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mst3kproject · 5 years ago

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The Devil Bat

Two #fuck this movie entries in a row? Yikes. Time for something fun. Here we have Bela Lugosi and a fake bat on a string, in a movie brought to us by the Producers Releasing Corporation, who also gave us the classic I Accuse my Parents. It’s a bad movie masterpiece all on its own, and Joel and the bots could only have made it better.

As the opening card informs us, Paul Carruthers is the kindly local doctor in the village of Heathville… kinda like how Harold Shipton was the kindly local doctor in Hyde. In between tending to his patients, Dr. Carruthers has been carrying on twisted experiments in his secret laboratory. Electrical stimulation has allowed his pet bats to grow to the size of geese, which is certainly impressive but doesn’t seem very useful until the doctor’s business partner Mr. Heath inadvertently insults him. Seeking revenge, Carruthers trains the bats to attack anything with a particular scent, and then sends that scent to his enemies in the form of a shaving lotion! Can ace reporter Johnny Layton find the truth about the ‘Devil Bat’ before the entire Heath family is destroyed?

This movie was like a nice sorbet after the two course rotisserie turd that was Curse of Bigfoot and Sorority Girl. It has everything I want out of a lousy old horror movie: bad actors, a ridiculous plot, and hilariously shoddy effects, all dished out so earnestly that you can’t help but love the result.

It’s a fairly guilt-free pleasure, too, because I’m pretty sure no bats were harmed in the making of this movie. There’s a couple of close-up shots of a live flying fox, but almost all the bats we see are silly stiff props that don’t even deserve to be dignified with the label puppet. Dr. Carruthers carries these around dangling from coat hangers. In order to make them grow he just hooks them up to a battery with alligator clips, then puts some goggles on and watches. We see the stupid fake bat getting electrocuted, then cut to Carruthers watching, then cut back to a slightly larger fake bat getting electrocuted.

When the bat attacks, it dangles from a string (shaken slightly to make it ‘flap’) and swoops down to sink its fangs into people’s necks! This prop does double-duty, since it also appears to serve as the fake bat the reporters rig up to get pictures of. It’s the sort of monster you see Maciste fight half a dozen of when he visits the underworld. The movie’s best bat moment, however, is the cardboard cutout that passes by to cast its shadow over the lurid newspaper headlines. I can’t even describe how hilarious this is.

Bela Lugosi is in excellent mad scientist form, grinning and gloating and giving his all in a movie that really doesn’t deserve it. Everybody else is very bland, both the actors and their characters, but it doesn’t matter because they’re frankly not important. The audience is here to watch this stupid fake bat kill people at Bela’s orders, and the other characters don’t need to do anything but scream really loud as they die. The film-makers know this, too, because they devote the bare minimum of time to things other than Bela and the bat. The story speeds through all the plot stuff as efficiently as it can, so it’ll have time to linger on the mad science, crazed monologues, and stupid effects we came here for.

In some movies this might make Layton into a Hero Who Doesn’t Do Anything, but surprisingly, The Devil Bat avoids that pitfall. Layton and McGuire aren’t exactly likable heroes and their supposedly humourous antics are never funny, but they continue to actively pursue the mystery even after they’ve technically lost their jobs over their pictures of a faker bat, apparently out of active concern for the people the bat is menacing. Layton follows the clues back to Carruthers in a reasonably sensible fashion, and even has the presence of mind to react to the devil bats by shooting at them rather than standing around yelling! His motivations for this are slightly selfish, in that he wants his job back and is in love with Mary Heath (what she sees in him is a mystery), but he definitely doesn’t just blunder through it like the reporter from The Mad Monster.

At the end, Carruthers is destroyed by his own creation when the Devil Bat turns on its master, as is inevitable for any mad scientist movie. Even this doesn’t leave Layton out of the action, though – Layton came to Carruthers with his theory that the bats are attracted to the aftershave, and puts it on himself in order to lure them… then splashes some on Carruthers, too. In the finale, then, they are both in equal danger. Layton is an active character rather than a reactive one, which seems to be something very difficult to do in movies like this that tend to focus on the villain. So props for that.

There’s also some good fun to be enjoyed in Carruthers’ behaviour throughout the movie. The impression we get of Mr. Heath and his friend Mr. Morton is that they’re grateful for Carruthers’ help and would happily give him more money if he asked for it. It just never occurs to him to ask for it – he’d rather go straight into mad science revenge mode. When you note that he started creating giant bats well before his beef with Mr. Heath, it seems like Carruthers has just been waiting for an excuse to send his pets off to kill people. There’s also the fact that he’s very careful not to get any of his lotion on himself, to the point of throwing away a jacket that has become contaminated with the stuff… but on more than one occasion he shakes hands with somebody who’s just been applying it and then doesn’t wash afterwards. He ought to have bats gnawing on his fingertips.

I was a bit surprised to realize that this is only the second bat-centric movie I’ve watched for this blog. The other was, of course, It Lives by Night. I was annoyed by the way It Lives by Night presented bats as bloodthirsty little monsters, but for some reason I didn’t have the same problem with The Devil Bat. I gave that some thought, and decided there were two reasons for it. The first is just that The Devil Bat spends less time tormenting actual bats. The Devil Bat itself is very clearly fake, and while a fruit bat of some sort does appear in a couple of close-up shots, it doesn’t look like it’s having nearly such a bad day as the bats from It Lives by Night.

The second, more important reason, is that The Devil Bat gives us some kind of justification for the bat’s behaviour. Carruthers created this animal specifically to be the instrument of his revenge. It attacks because it’s been taught to hate the scent of the shaving lotion. It Lives by Night does nothing similar, and seems to want to suggest that bats are just naturally murderous. That’s bad press that these already much-maligned creatures don’t need.

(Bats’ ability to carry nine hundred horrible diseases and not get sick is, by the way, yet another of their amazing superpowers. SciShow on YouTube recently did a video on this if you’re curious.)

Of course The Devil Bat does have its annoyances. Layton and McGuire are meant to be comic relief as well as heroes, and they’re about as funny as most comic relief reporters in terrible old movies. They never quite descend to the level of Watney or Dropo but they don’t reach any heights, either. Each of them also gets a very perfunctory love story that contributes nothing to the plot, with Layton falling in love with Mary Heath and McGuire with her French maid (yes, a literal French maid) Maxine. So little time is devoted to these subplots that one wonders why the film-makers bothered including them. The only reason I can think of is that even with them the movie’s only sixty-eight minutes long.

I probably could say something about The Devil Bat’s gender politics if I wanted. The Heath family has made their fortune in cosmetics and yet there’s a bit where the newspaper editor seems to ridicule women for ‘all that goo they put on their faces’. I’m honestly not sure it’s worth the effort, though. I mean, it’s a movie about a giant bat on a string killing people because it doesn’t like their cologne.

Likewise, there may be some sort of commentary happening in the subplot about the reporters losing their jobs. They really want to get the real story but they also really need to have something to show their bosses in the meantime, and it’s the latter that drives them to stunts like their even faker bat-on-a-string. Or maybe something could be made of the thing with Mr. Heath underpaying Dr. Carruthers. The cheque he sends him is for five thousand dollars, which was, as Joel and the Bots enjoyed saying, a lot of money back now. The movie seems to feel that Mr. Heath was more than generous… but again, is it really worth taking The Devil Bat that seriously?

That’s as good a sum-up as any of The Devil Bat, really… it’s not meant to be thought about and I, for one, am not going to waste my time doing so. Not when I can revel in the sight of that stiff fake bat on a string being swung into victims’ necks. All the film-makers wanted was for us to watch and smile for an hour or so, and that’s exactly what you will do if you look The Devil Bat up on YouTube, where it is freely available in the public domain. Enjoy!

#mst3k #reviews #the devil bat #episodes that never were #40s #magic voice recommends

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mxliv-oftheendless · 5 years ago

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Writer’s Month Prompts Day 19

Day 19: Metamorphosis

Oh my god you guys this one was so much fun to write out! Requested by @cosmicrealmofkissteria <3 Hope you like it!!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Listen, Velma tried to be a good student. She was a Ravenclaw, after all; she just wanted to be a good student, make it through Hogwarts, graduate at or near the top of her class, and go on to have a promising career in whatever she excelled in. She was thinking Potions; it was rather like Muggle chemistry, which she had always been fascinated by.

So far she had nice friends as well; there was Fred and Daphne, both Gryffindors. Fred, a Chaser for the Gryffindor Quidditch team, wasn’t the brightest lightbulb of the bunch, but he still tried, and liked to create complicated traps with his magic. Daphne was a redheaded firecracker who all the boys agreed was one of the prettiest at Hogwarts (which kind of lowered Velma’s own self-esteem a bit but anyway), but she was the nicest girl and was always ready to defend her friends to bullies. There was also Norville, but he preferred Shaggy, a lanky beatnik of a Hufflepuff who sometimes got scared of his own shadow; he was kindhearted and was always down to hang out with his friends, or sneak into the kitchen to hang out with the house elves and eat. She was pretty sure all the house elves loved him.

Apart from her friends, who made life at Hogwarts more fun, there was also… Paul.

There were many reasons to stay away from Paul. For one he was a Slytherin, and although Velma didn’t believe in relying solely on stereotypes, she had been made fun of by enough Slytherins already to want to keep her distance from most of the lot of them. He also had the reputation of being a heartbreaker and a shameless flirt, flirting with girls and even some boys, and Velma wasn’t keen on getting her hopes up only to have them crushed. Also, although he wasn’t as obnoxious as her fellow Ravenclaw Ace Frehley, he still was one of the boys that liked to fool around in class. Did he ever actually get any work done?

So yeah, there were many reasons to stay away from Paul Stanley. Even if he had a cute face and that long dark curly hair and a charming smile… all the more reason to stay away from him. It was always the handsome ones that were the worst, her mother always said.

“Hey! Hey, Velma!”

Velma froze in the hallway. Speak of the devil… She turned around to find Paul himself running to catch up with her, bookbag bouncing against his side. He stopped and smiled as he worked to catch his breath. “Finally caught up with you… You dropped this.”

He held out… a quill? Velma blinked at him. “You ran all that way because I dropped a quill?”

Paul shrugged. “It wasn’t that far,”

Blinking owlishly at him for a second, Velma reached out and took back the quill. “Thanks,”

“No problem.” She was about to turn around when Paul spoke again. “You’re headed to Transfiguration, right? Mind if I walk with you?”

And she was reduced to blinking owlishly at him again. He kept smiling for some reason and explained, “Ravenclaws and Slytherins have Transfiguration together. We’re in the same class.”

How did he know that? I mean she knew that, she’d known they were in the same class ever since term started, but why would he put in the effort to observe that?

Don’t fall for it, Velma. Don’t fall for the smile and the good looks. Plus everyone’s going to assume you’re dating him and you’ll never get a moment to yourself again. “I’d… I’d rather walk by myself, thanks,”

A look of disappointment flashed across his face, but only for about a millisecond. “Oh. Okay, that’s fine. I’ll see you in class, then.”

Velma nodded. “Yeah,”

She turned back around and strode briskly away, her mind turning. What was that about? No guy had ever put in the effort to talk to her before, unless it was to make fun of her or get closer to Daphne. Heck, Paul had even flirted with Daphne before. But Velma was alone. What did he gain from talking to her when she wasn’t with Daphne?

Unbeknownst to her, Paul was watching her walk quickly away, and he sighed. There went his chance to ask if she wanted to go to Hogsmeade with him. Gene was right; he really did have it bad for her.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Velma paid attention carefully to Professor McGonagall as she lectured the class. They were learning the spell that would turn creatures into rabbits. She wondered if it would work on human beings as well, but before she could raise her hand and ask, Professor McGonagall was demonstrating the spell. Oh well; she could ask her after class was dismissed.

Readying her wand, Velma focused on the object in front of her, which was a jewelry box. She focused on the box, imagining it turning into a rabbit in her mind. She waved her wand. “Lapifors!”

The box morphed, until it was a small rabbit.

“Very good, Miss Dinkley,” Professor McGonagall complimented as she walked past, supervising the students as they attempted to pull off the spell. Velma beamed happily. “Perhaps you can also figure out how to reverse it back?”

Velma gave a moment of thought, then looked down at the rabbit sitting on her desk and waved her wand. “Repari—”

Then she suddenly jerked up as pain washed over her bones. Her arms and legs seized and jerked, and Velma felt a flash of panic as her wand fell from her hands and she suddenly heard a familiar voice screaming something. She fell out of her chair and her vision went dark.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Paul was barely paying attention to Professor McGonagall as she lectured them all on the spell. He was too focused on the back of Velma’s head. It was turned towards the front, and he knew from having other classes with her that she was paying close attention to every word. It wasn’t until Gene nudged him that he snapped back into focus and lifted his wand to attempt to perform the spell.

After a few tries, spent waving his wand at the water goblet on his desk and saying “Lapifors”, Paul gave up. He sat back and sighed, and glanced over at Gene’s successful attempt, currently sniffing around his desk. “How did you do that?”

“Say it with feeling,” Gene advised.

“I’ve been trying to do that!”

“Well try it again,”

Paul sat forward and lifted his wand. He was about to wave it when he heard, “Very good, Miss Dinkley,”

He looked up to see that Professor McGonagall had stopped at Velma’s desk. Had she already transfigured her object? He wondered if Velma was beaming proudly at the praise like she had once when Professor Snape said her sleeping draught was “acceptable”, the highest praise anyone outside of Slytherin was likely to receive from him. She had such a pretty smile…

Smiling at the thought of Velma’s likely happiness, Paul turned his attention back to his water goblet and waved his wand. “Lapifors!—Hey!”

Gene’s rabbit had crept over to his desk and started sniffing his arm, and Paul jerked his arm away, in the process moving his wand in the wrong direction. For a moment, he hoped nothing would happen. Then he suddenly heard shouts of surprise and looked up just in time to see Professor McGonagall back away and, terrifyingly, Velma collapse to the floor. He rocketed out of his chair and ran towards her desk, pushing through the forming crowd of students. He looked down… and stopped.

Velma’s robes, uniform, and glasses lay on the floor, nothing in them except a rather large lump. The lump began to move, until a small pink nose surrounded by brown fur poked out of the hem of the skirt.

Gasps rose and Paul’s stomach dropped in utter horror as a brown rabbit crept out of the robes.

Then sudden laughter began to erupt, maddeningly from a chorus of Slytherin girls. “Dinkley’s been turned into a rabbit!” they jeered. “Now she’s got four legs to match her four eyes!”

“Shut up!” Paul whirled around to shout at them. They stopped in utter shock, because Paul had never yelled in anger before. He turned back to Velma, who was being inspected by Professor McGonagall. “Is she okay?” he asked worriedly. He felt like the lowest form of humanity; this was all his fault. If only he’d been focusing on the water goblet instead of thinking about Velma…

“Miss Dinkley is all right,” Professor McGonagall confirmed. “But it seems someone has turned her into a rabbit.” She straightened up and fixed them all with a stern glare. “Well? Who is responsible for this?”

Paul knew there was no way he could get out of this. But he deserved whatever penalty he got. So with a regretful look, he raised his hand. “It was me… It was an accident, I swear. I wasn’t focusing and I moved my arm and—I’m sorry…”

Professor McGonagall looked at him sternly. “Mr. Stanley, be thankful this can be easily fixed. You could have caused irreversible harm to Miss Dinkley. We will discuss your punishment later. In the meantime, you will help me get Miss Dinkley and her belongings to the hospital wing.”

Her tone of voice left no room for argument; not even Gene was willing to protest Paul getting punished for a simple mistake when Professor Minerva McGonagall spoke like that. Paul simply nodded, “Yes, ma’am,” and went to grab Velma’s bookbag and wand. He also bent down to gather up Velma’s clothes from the floor while Professor McGonagall carefully picked up Velma, who was visibly shaking. Paul wondered if she was panicking over what was happening, or if she could hear and therefore knew it was Paul’s fault she’d been turned into a rabbit.

“All the rest of you, carry on,” Professor McGonagall instructed. “Return to your seats. Come along, Mr. Stanley.”

Paul nodded and followed her out of the classroom, the entire time wondering how he was going to apologize to Velma for this.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

He ended up keeping his distance from Velma for a week afterwards, too nervous of how she would react. He was also kept away by her friends, mostly Daphne, who upon hearing about the incident confronted him and accused him of doing it on purpose. He also had to serve detention, and got five points taken away from Slytherin. But he spent his entire detention thinking about what he was going to say, and as soon as he was set free he sped off to find Velma.

His first pick to look was the library, and to his glee he found her at a table in the back doing her homework. She was too absorbed to hear him approach, which was good, because it gave him a chance to get his nerves under control. He blew out a quiet sigh, clenching and unclenching his fists, then pulled a quill out of his pocket and placed it on the parchment she was writing on.

Velma stopped and looked up. He shrugged at her, hands in his pockets, and smiled. “A spare in case you lose your quill again,”

She frowned slightly, then pushed it back over to him and went back to work. His heart sank sadly, but he still didn’t give up. “Can we talk?”

“I’m kind of in the middle of something,” Velma whispered, not looking up at him. The harsh whisper stung.

“But I need to talk to you,”

“About what? Turning someone into a rabbit?”

Now that… that stung hard. A voice that for some reason sounded like Gene’s spoke in his head. Quit being a coward and say it. If nothing else than do it so I don’t have to hear you pining over her for another year.

He sighed and pulled out the chair beside her to sit down. “I’m so sorry that happened. I swear it was an accident. Gene’s rabbit sniffed my arm as I was saying the spell, and I jerked my body, like this—” he mimed his movements from the day of the incident, “and my wand moved and the spell hit you. I swear that’s what happened.” Velma glanced up at him, and for a moment he thought hopefully that she would speak, but then her eyes went back to the parchment. “I’m really, really sorry, Velma. If it makes you feel any better, I got detention and five points taken away from Slytherin.”

“Daphne said she was going to punch you in the face; that made me feel better.” Disappointingly, Paul’s face showed no signs of any punching. It never showed signs of any flaws; what was his skincare routine? Shut up, brain.

“Yeah, your friends confronted me in the hallway the other day. I told them it was an accident. Your one friend—Frank?”

“Fred,”

“Yeah, him, he said he would punch me in the face if he saw me go near you again,”

“Should’ve been Daphne who made that threat. Fred doesn’t follow through unless he’s in the moment.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. One time he saw a group of Gryffindors trying to beat up Shaggy and—” Velma froze, realizing she had raised her head and was looking at Paul. Oh jinkies, he was even cuter up close. “… And never mind.” She looked back down at her homework.

Paul’s heart sank again. He thought he’d been making progress. “Velma, please…” he reached out and placed his hand over hers, making her stop and look up at him. “Please let me make it up to you. I’ll do whatever you want. In fact…” he couldn’t believe he was going to say it, but, “do you want to go to Hogsmeade with me next weekend? I can take you to the Three Broomsticks or something, or wherever you want.”

Velma stared at him in utter surprise. After a moment of blinking at him, she asked, “… Are you asking me out on a date?”

“So I can make it up to you,” Paul said quickly. He didn’t want to ruin this somehow. “I can take you anywhere you want, or if you don’t want to do that I’ll do whatever you want. I just… I really like you, and maybe it doesn’t seem like it right now but I swear that I do. What happened in Transfiguration was a total accident.”

Silence. The seconds ticked by. And with every second that passed Paul’s anxiety grew. She was going to say no. She was going to tell him to go away. She was going to say to never talk to her again. She was going to yell—well, not yell because she wouldn’t want to get kicked out of the library—she was going to furiously whisper-yell that he had some nerve asking her out after he just turned her into a rabbit. She was going to—

“Okay,”

Paul immediately felt hope rise in his chest. “Really?”

“Yeah,” a faint smile was appearing in the corner of Velma’s mouth. “Okay. I’ll go to Hogsmeade with you. But I’m making you go with me to the bookstore first.”

Paul nodded his head so furiously that for a moment Velma thought it would fall off. “Okay, that’s fine. I’ll meet you in the courtyard before noon.”

“Sure.”

He couldn’t keep the smile off his face. “Well… great! I’ll leave you to your homework. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

Velma had a smile on her face, and it was a breathtaking smile if he’d ever seen one. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Paul waited until he had left the library, because he didn’t want to get yelled at by the horrifyingly scary Madam Pince. But when he was out in the hallway, he pumped his fist in victory. “Yes!”

He was so going to tell Gene when he got back to the Slytherin common room that he finally asked out Velma Dinkley, the cute bespectacled Ravenclaw he’d been pining over since last year… and that she said yes. Next weekend couldn’t come any faster…

#writersmonth2020 #starchild x velma #starvel #hogwarts au #omg you guys this was SO MUCH FUN #REALLY IT WAS #kiss au writing #scooby doo #my writing #hope you enjoyed!

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shandidellamorte · 5 years ago

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~KISS AU writings 21~

My brain doesn’t wanna leave this story alone lately! Hope you’ve been enjoying so far! <3

~Shandi

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~MODEL AU Part 8~

Featured Pairing: Bruce Kulick/Paul Stanley

Special Guests: Ace Frehley, Tommy Thayer

Summary: Bruce helps Paul finally heal an old wound. (told from Bruce’s POV)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

While I’m pouring myself a drink I hear a knock at my door. Wow, I didn’t expect him to get here so quickly. Then again he is driving that awesome Corvette~ When I open the door I have to keep my jaw from dropping. He looks amazing. His fur jacket. Those leather pants that hug his curves. He can look fabulous without even trying. He has more style in one finger than Vince Neil could ever hope to have in his entire body. He sighs as he moves past me and falls onto the couch, patting the empty space beside him. “C’mon over here. We need to talk.” He sounds serious which only makes my anxiety sky rocket. Did he lose his job? Mr. Criss wouldn’t be that heartless would he? I hold my glass tightly as I sit down. “Okay..what’s the bad news?” He gives me a little smile. “Well..I’m not really sure how to classify this. It��s not good..but it could be. It’s not bad either..but it could be. I’m reading through Runway this morning and a particular little ad caught my eye.” He unfolds the page he ripped out of the magazine and shows it to me. It was an ad for a PR firm that specialized specifically in model affairs. Was this..important somehow? “I’m..not sure I understand..”

“It’s okay..I didn’t either at first. I was just going to dismiss it. Then I saw the name.” I take a closer look. The firm was called Space Ace International. Oh.

“OH.”

“Yeah..”

He takes the page and looks at it again before folding it back up. The expression on his face is unreadable. I want to help but I have no idea what I can do. He leans over and lays his head on my shoulder. “The main office is here in California. In Hollywood. I’m..thinking of going.” I think I know what he has in mind. “You..want me to come with you?” He nods. “I’d appreciate that. I’m definitely going to need your support for this.” I wrap my arm around him and hold him close. “You should spend the night then. We can leave in the morning.” He laughs. “I was hoping you’d say that. I have my overnight bag in my car~” Oh boy, a trip to see Paul’s ex. What could go wrong?

The next day we take Paul’s car for the drive to Hollywood. I have to admit there was a little selfishness in that decision. I just wanted a chance to ride in his Corvette again~ I can see his hands start to shake as we pull into the building’s parking lot. He looks calm but I know he has to be freaking out on the inside. Once he parks I pull him into a hug. “It’ll be okay. I’m going to be right there with you. The worst he can do is refuse to see you, and if he does then maybe it just wasn’t meant to be.” He holds me tightly and clings to my shirt. “Thank you again for doing this, Brucie. I have to try. I can’t..have this hanging over my head anymore. I need some damn closure.” I can understand that. I want this to be good for him. I can only hope that it is.

As soon as we enter the building I feel as if we’ve just stepped out into space. All of the walls are painted with stars, planets and galaxies. I have to say it’s a damn fine job. It certainly fits the company’s namesake. A younger man comes down the hallways towards us. He has a big smile on his face and a head full of blond curls. He holds out his hand for us to shake. “Good morning, gentlemen and welcome to Space Ace PR! I’m Tommy. Is there something I can help you with?” When Paul hesitates I place my hand on his back. “U-um..yes. I’d..like to see Ace. Is he here?” Tommy frowns. “I’m sorry but you need an appointment to see Mr. Frehley. Is it important?”

“Tell him it’s Paulie. He knows who I am.”

“O-okay.”

He clearly has no idea about their history. But he walks off anyway because he wouldn’t be doing his job if he didn’t. Now it’s a waiting game. A game that Paul despises. I’m pretty sure he’s about to wear a hole in the floor from pacing before Tommy finally comes back. “Follow me.” The sheer relief in Paul’s face is nice to see. We go down a long hallway to an elevator that only goes up to the executive offices. The one we’re going to is on the top floor. No wonder he took so long. When the door opens I take Paul’s hand and lead him out. He squeezes my hand when Tommy opens the door. Ace is standing on the other side to greet us.

“So it really is you, Paulie. I couldn’t believe it when Tommy told me. I had to see for myself.”

“Hello to you too, Ace.”

He looks over at me. “Boyfriend?”

“No. I asked him to come with me for..support. I didn’t think you’d actually bother to let me in.”

“I almost didn’t. But I figured what you’ve gotta say should be fuckin’ hilarious.”

The condescension is thick in his tone. I could see Paul trying to back away towards the door. I hold him in place to keep him from bolting. After he takes some time to collect himself he continues. “You might think so..but it needs to be said.”

“Alright fine. Lay it on me then.”

He steps closer to Ace and takes his hands, looking him straight in the eyes. “You..didn’t deserve what happened to you. It was my fault..and I lost you because of my selfishness. I can never take back what I’ve done but I want you to know how sorry I am for doing it. I never expected to see you again..but when I found out this was your company I had to come so I could talk to you if you’d let me. I want to reconnect with you..to regain some of what I’ve lost. I’m not expecting anything right away. I only want a chance. Please, Ace.”

Ace is quiet for a long time. Probably thinking about what to say. Whatever the outcome is I’m so proud of Paul for saying what he said. He can only improve from here..as long as he has someone to help keep him from falling back. “Wow, Paulie I..I think I’m flippin’ my wig a little here. I coulda sworn you just apologized to me and admitted to bein’ an egocentric little bitchcake.” Paul laughs and it’s a delightful sound. “That I did~” Ace then lets out a loud ridiculous cackle that leaves my ears ringing. “You always were full of surprises~! Tell ya what..why don’t we have dinner with Cat and talk things over, hah? Once we get all the mess squared away between the three of us I’ll call it even. Deal?” Paul hugs him tightly. “Anything you say~ I can call Petey when I get back~”

“Good! Now go feed y’self alright? You’re as white as a ghost! You..uh..what’s your name?”

“Bruce.”

“Make sure he eats somethin’ will ya, Brucie? I used to keep tellin’ him that starvin’ himself is no good and it’s still not!”

I chuckle. “Yes sir, I’ll get right on it~”

They hug again before we leave. Paul takes my hand again as we head to the elevator. I honestly didn’t expect it to go so smoothly. Maybe the time apart was good for mellowing things out.

“You know what, Brucie? I am starving. Let’s have breakfast~”

Happiness makes his face more vibrant than any makeup..and it’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen~

To be Continued!!

#Shandi's drabbles #KISS AU writings #Supermodel StarChild~#Paul has to deal with his past #Bruce is there to help~

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charmedtheselfproclaimedking · 5 years ago

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Charmed Again: Season 2 (Charmed Fanfic)

Episode 1 - Back to Black: Part 1 (Premiere)

Warnings: I don’t own the rights to any of the characters from the hit TV show “Charmed” or the storylines related to the show those rights belong to original creator Constance M Burge.

15+ Moderate/Graphic Displays of Violence, Sexual Innuendos, Witchcraft and Potentially Triggering Scenes.

Pan sat on the couch within the attic in her family home looking through a family photo album that included pictures of Prue, Piper, Phoebe, Paige, Melinda, Wyatt and Chris as well as containing baby, child and teenage pictures of herself and Paul.

“Do you know the elders summon me more than you do these days?” Piper complained as she appeared as if from out of nowhere.

“I’m sorry grams things around here have got even more crazy than normal as I’m sure you’ve probably seen for yourself.” Pan replied as she stood up, placing the photo album down on the couch.

“Yeah I’ve seen which is why I decided it was time to properly check in,” Piper explained to her granddaughter. “How are you coping with it all?”

“I’m doing good yeah it’s most Drake that’s struggling with it all although he’s acting like it’s not affected him, I know it has. He doesn’t let people in easily and when he does, he winds up hurt that’s got to blow.” Pan admitted to her.

“The elders have always been real pains in the proverbial especially with their archaic ideology you should’ve seen the hissy fit they through when I married your grandfather but eventually they learned I wouldn’t back down and it was time for them to change their ways which I hope happens again in this case.” Piper reassured her.

“I’m not sure this time Grams I’ve not seen or heard much from Quinn since he got reassigned and I doubt Drake’s going to open himself up again just to be hurt.” Pan replied honestly.

“Drake’s a lot more resilient than you think and he’s full of surprises I mean just look at him you and Paul all under the same roof.” Piper disagreed with her granddaughter. “I never thought he would wind up moving in and he did.”

“Pan are you coming back to...” Lacey began to ask while walking into the attic before noticing Piper. “Oh, never mind.”

“Hello again Lacey I see being dead is a good look on you.” Piper said to her granddaughter’s girlfriend.

“Right back at you Mrs Halliwell.” Lacey replied to her.

“I’m so glad Aunt Paige bended the rules about white lighters and sped up Lacey’s process.” Pan admitted as she walked over to Lacey and kissed her. “I couldn’t imagine life without you.”

“Yes, well every now and then the elders and by which, I mean my sister Paige manages to get things right.” Piper told them both. “Where is my grandson and great grandson anyway?”

“Paul’s working late at the law firm and Drake’s always late coming in from Devilish Delights.” Pan explained to her grandmother.

“What the hell is Devilish Delights?” Piper wondered.

“A very nice and very colorful performance venue for exotic male dancers.” Pan reluctantly replied.

“Oh,” Lacy laughed. “She means a strip club.”

“I suppose continuing to give you more and more chances are proving worthwhile for me.” Cindy smirked while she and Drake stood in Cindy’s office fixing their tops, having clearly just had some fun with each other.

“Please I’m the closest thing you have to a friend around here unless your hiding them somewhere really good.” Drake laughed, teasing his boss.

“Friends are seriously overrated I mean what use has anyone really got out of friendship?” Cindy replied. “If I wanted friends, I’d have friends, but I don’t.”

“Don’t you consider me a friend?” Drake asked as he moved closer towards his boss.

“I don’t do emotional attachments of any kind and that’s the reason why this works.” Cindy admitted before leaning in to kiss him only to be frozen mid-air.

“Didn’t I ban you and Paul from ever coming here?” Drake asked as he turned around to see Pan and Piper stood at the now opened office door.

“Yeah this time I’m not doing the freezing or the invading.” Pan replied while pointing at her grandmother, making it clear Piper was to blame.

“Who even are you?” Drake asked Piper, clearly unamused.

“Hello, anyone home?” Paul shouted as he walked into the foyer only to see Lacey orb into the foyer, although Lacey didn’t quite execute the landing making her fall to the floor upon appearing into the room.

“Damn, Quinn always made it look so bloody easy, but orbing is really hard,” Lacey moaned as Paul helped her back on her feet. “If I don’t start acing this white lighter thing quickly, they may consider taking my wings off me.”

“Lacey you’re still relatively new to all of this you’re not supposed to be the best straight away give it time.” Paul suggested to her. “Where is everyone?”

“Your grandmother Piper Halliwell returned from the grave once again just in time for Drake’s birthday tomorrow.” Lacey told him.

“Drake’s birthday is on the 31st of October, I should know considering I was there the day he was born.” Paul replied to his white lighter.

“True but Halloween is a big no for him, so we just do his birthday the week before, so he doesn’t have to be associated with all hallows eve.” Lacey explained to her charge. “I swear I tried doing a fancy-dress themed birthday for his 21st and the guy almost killed me on the spot.”

“How can Drake not love Halloween the guy’s obsessed with horror movies and all things spooky to an alarming level which I guess is the demon in him, but Halloween should be his favorite time of year.” Paul wondered. “Not to mention as a Halliwell it’s the most important time of year for us.”

“Delilah was a huge fan of Halloween and she used to go all out every year she’d throw this big party for the entire street and her and Drake used to spend so much time decorating, designing costumes and coming up with ideas.” Lacey revealed to Drake’s biological father. “It was their thing and he’s refused to celebrate it since to be honest with you I think she made such a big deal about Halloween because it was her son’s birthday she loved him more than anything and he loved her so much.”

“That’s terrible here’s me believing Drake and I were growing closer and not only didn’t I know he loathed his own birthday but I didn’t even know the woman that raised my son the woman he called mum was named Delilah.” Paul admitted, hurt by the realization his white lighter knew his own son better than him.

“I wouldn’t blame yourself on that one Drake’s a hard one to open up on a good day never mind opening up about the worst day of his life.” Lacey said, trying to make Paul feel better about himself. “His father was called Stewart in case you were wondering about him too.”

“What was his father like?” Paul asked her.

“He was a regular dad type nothing to write home about really Drake was always closer to his mum but Stewart and him did have their wrestling addiction they bonded over every week they used to go to shows together and Drake would get so excited to spend time with him.” Lacey continued to reveal more about Drake’s adoptive family before beginning to laugh over a memory she quickly shared with Paul. “I remember Mr Black tried bonding with him with a father son camping trip which I of course invited myself too and Drake was just hopeless and it wound up being just me and Stewart doing some father and son’s friend bonding why trying to find Drake.”

“Where was Drake when you eventually found him?” Paul wondered with a smile on his face, happy to hear more about his son even if it wasn’t from Drake himself.

“In a nearby hotel he paid for after swiping his dad’s credit card which was pretty much expected from us both except for finding Jake in the room with him which Mr Black wasn’t so happy about.” Lacey laughed. “He would’ve been even more pissed if he realized that’s when his son lost his…never mind.”

“I think we should work on having Drake move his birthday back to the right date I mean his mum would want him to keep up the tradition she created for them both.” Paul suggested to Lacey.

“Trust me when I say that conversation won’t end well, I’ve tried it a few times myself and it only ever ends up in disaster Drake really doesn’t like talking about anything deep especially with new people, no offense.” Lacey warned her charge. “Quinn was lucky Drake let him in like he did which was clearly a big mistake. I liked Quinn too I can’t believe I was fooled into thinking he was a good guy.”

“Quinn’s not a bad guy in fact he’s one of the best guys I’ve ever met.” Paul defended his departed friend. “The elders made it clear he had to give us up as charges if he had a choice, he’d still be here trust me.”

“I understand this whole white lighter gig has a bunch of stupid rules which I have to memorize like no matter how idiotic, grumpy or down right rude my charges can get I’m not supposed to bite back which is a thing I’ve complained to Paige about in length.” Lacey complained. “My point is Quinn at the very least could’ve said goodbye to Drake elders be damned Drake deserved a goodbye.”

“Maybe saying goodbye was just to hard for him.” Paul replied.

“Not that it’s not lovely having people I know pop up where I work especially the dead kind but what are you actually doing here?” Drake asked Piper as Piper, Drake and Pan stood in the parking lot outside of Devilish Delights.

“I’m pretty sure mid-day hook ups with your boss isn’t in the job description for stripping although I’m not exactly an expert in that area.” Piper joked before going on to reveal. “I’m here to celebrate your first birthday living under the Halliwell Manor which I’ve been told you celebrate a year early.”

“I’m grateful you dug yourself out of your own grave just for my birthday but it’s not exactly a special one and I don’t intend to do anything special for it.” Drake replied to his great-grandmother.

“Yeah that’s not quite how it works when one of us return from up there no digging is actually involved.” Piper explained to him.

“I really think you should reconsider doing something special it means a lot to us to get to spend your first birthday with you.” Pan tried to persuade her nephew.

“I understand birthdays aren’t your thing but there a big deal to us and I want to use this occasion to get a proper chance to get to know you.” Piper admitted to Drake. “Please just let us do something if only to appease us.”

“Fine,” Drake reluctantly caved. “We can do brunch or lunch but that’s all.”

“You are going to be so pleasantly surprised by how amazing I am as a chef in fact I taught your father everything he knows although I must admit he never quite mastered it as well as me but he sure comes a very close second.” Piper boasted.

Paul and Pan found themselves sitting at the table in the dining room of their family home waiting for Drake to come downstairs as the table was filled with a luxurious display of food while Piper kept popping in and out from the kitchen with more plates of food she somehow managed to squeeze onto the table.

“I know Lacey advised me against it, but I really think we should convince Drake to celebrate his birthday on his actual birthday Halloween isn’t exactly a holiday that we as witches should be avoiding.” Paul suggested to his younger sister.

“I say we don’t rock the boat this year at least I mean you’ve just got him living under the same roof pushing him too soon might not end well.” Pan replied to her brother. “Besides this is about the parents who raised him that’s not exactly an easy topic to approach especially when you’re the father who gave him up.”

“I agree with you both, I agree with Paul in that as a Halliwell it would basically be sacrilege to ignore Halloween, but I also agree with Pan that Drake celebrating his birthday should be up to him.” Piper interjected while placing another plate on the table. “Halloween has a way of making Halliwell’s celebrate whether they like it or not.”

“Maybe I should just talk it out with him and get him to be more open with me?” Paul asked his sister and grandmother.

“Because that has worked so well in the past.” Pan replied with sarcasm.

“I’m sorry honey but Drake’s brick walls have brick walls behind them and who knows how many layers of cement.” Piper told her grandson as she walked over to him and placed her hand on his shoulder. “I mean even I’m handling with kitten gloves and I normally blow things up.”

“You’re both right I just hate the fact he’s still beating himself up about things that were in no way within his control and I hate he’s hurting and there’s nothing I can do to stop him from hurting.” Paul admitted.

“I know sweetie,” Piper replied as she hugged into her grandson.

Lacey orbed into the dining room once again missing the landing and this time falling mid air crashing into the table breaking the dining table and destroying Piper’s entire buffet of food at the same time much to Paul and Pan’s horror as they looked over at their clearly furious grandmother Piper.

“Oh god,” Pan said in shock. “My grandmother is totally going to explode my girlfriend.”

Having waited long enough for the birthday guest and leaving Pan, Paul and Lacey to clean up made by the rookie white lighter Piper decided it was time to chase Drake out of his bedroom only to find him putting on his jacket after knocking on his door and letting herself into his bedroom.

“Good you’re finally ready I did make a buffet but let’s just say Lacey’s orbing ruined the feast.” Piper said to her great grandson.

“Thanks, I can only imagine you went to a lot of work, but I have to go into work.” Drake replied to her.

“Isn’t the whole point of sleeping with your boss that you get benefits let’s say like time off on your birthday?” Piper joked.

“It’s that a subtle way of you saying you don’t approve of me stripping or that you don’t approve of me sleeping with my boss?” Drake asked his great grandmother.

“I married my white lighter which was considered a lot worse than dating your boss back then so I’m not going to judge you for who you sleep with or strip for I just want to spend some time with my first great grandchild on their first birthday with his family.” Piper admitted to him.

“No offense Piper but this isn’t my family in fact everyone at Devilish Delights has known me longer than the people in this house barring Lacey who is actually my family.” Drake replied. “I’m not trying to be mean or hurtful it’s just you’re not my family, this isn’t my birthday and even if it was, I don’t do birthdays.”

“We’re trying really hard here Drake sooner or later you’re going to have to meet us halfway.” Piper made herself clear.

“It’s been months since they took the charmed ones off me as charges when are you going to convince them to reinstate me as their white lighter?” Quinn asked Paige as the two of them stood within the clouds.

“I hoped for the process not to take this long but then Lacey wound up getting herself killed by a demon with her father’s face and Pan was left completely grief stricken so I had to change priorities and make sure I could rush the white lighter process for Pan and Lacey to be reunited.” Paige explained to the white lighter. “From the feedback I’m getting from the other elders it may take a while for them to come around to everything and even then, I’ll have a hard time convincing them the charmed ones need two white lighters. There is a way I could probably swing it with them to reinstate you now, but I don’t think you’d like it.”

“Paige I’ll do anything to get back to them.” Quinn pleaded with her.

“You’ll have to refuse all feelings you have for Drake and that you won’t act on any feelings for him and I could get them to reinstate you now but I’d rather you just wait until I get this demons and angels rule overturned.” Paige revealed to him.

“And how long will I have to wait for that rule to be changed?” Quinn asked the elder.

“I’m not sure how long it’s going to take or even if I will be successful, but I am extremely hopeful.” Paige reluctantly admitted while still trying to give Quinn some hope.

“I’ll make the promise to the elders and I’ll never act on my feelings for Drake.” Quinn decided. “I can’t be away from them any longer especially with the source and the triad still out there.”

Drake was stood within a local cemetery in San Francisco holding a red rose in his hand as he looked over at his adoptive parents Delilah and Stewart Black’s gravestone.

“I’ve been thinking about you a lot lately mum wondering what my life would’ve been like if you were still around wondering if you ever forgave me for what I did.” Drake cried as tears fell down his cheeks. “Wondering if you’d want me to embrace the Halliwell’s or run away as fast I can. I met my biological mother and I betrayed your memory by calling her mum you’re the only real mum I’ve ever had and I’m so sorry for never appreciating you enough when you were around. The truth is I’ve never recovered from losing you and now all these new people are in my life trying to push me to move on and I’m so beyond terrified of trying to live again.”

“Your mother could never blame you for an accident that happened when you were still a child, but something tells me you’re never going to believe it until you hear it from her.” Piper said as she appeared standing next to her great grandson before Drake was left stunned to see his mother Delilah appear in front of him in a series of white orbs instantly becoming corporeal.

“Mum.” Drake struggled to mumble as his voice broke before he ran over to hug his mother beginning to sob in her arms as Piper looked on with tears in her eyes “I’m so sorry.”

“Drake you have nothing to apologize for honey.” Delilah told her son as she broke off their hug and kept her hand on his face stroking his cheek lovingly. “The fire was an accident that you had no way of knowing would even happen I mean how could you, you didn’t even know you had powers back then.”

“I’ve missed you and dad so much mum.” Drake continued to cry.

“You had no reason to miss me or your father because we’ve never left you, we’ve always been there with every move you’ve made.” Delilah revealed to her son. “We were there when your heart broke over your first love Jake, we were even they when you were stripping at that club although your dad and I look away at the skin filled parts. We were there when you became a cop, when you found your birth father, your birth mother and when you became a charmed one.”

“Really?” Drake asked his mother as tears continued to fall down his cheeks.

“You have made us so much prouder than we could have ever imagined you would. You’re an amazing and loving boy who has done some truly incredible things and I know you will continue to do even more.” Delilah admitted to Drake. “It truly breaks my hear that you keep closing yourself off to everyone because of this stupid notion you have of not deserving to be loved. Life will never get better if you keep not living it Drake and you deserve to have the most wonderful life.”

“I don’t feel like I do.” Drake argued with tears still in his eyes.

“Yes, you do you deserve to be the happiest person and I refuse to allow you to think otherwise for any longer!” Delilah demanded.

“I’ve never learned how to be happy without you and dad.” Drake admitted to his mother.

“You never have to be because even when you don’t see us, we’re always there.” Delilah promised him. “We will continue to always be there but you have more than just us now you have your father and your aunt now too and I know there’s enough room in your heart to love us all so let Paul and Pan in because they really do love you and you deserved to be loved.”

“Can I help you?” Cindy asked Piper Halliwell as she the witch walked into Devilish Delights where Cindy was stood behind the bar counter waiting for her arrival.

“Yes, you can go ahead and tell me why my great grandson’s boss is a demon who seems to be taking a special interest in him?” Piper wondered as she walked over towards the demonic club owner.

“You do realize your great grandson is also part demon himself.” Cindy replied to her.

“I’ll be the one asking the questions here unless you would prefer me jumping straight to the exploding.” Piper snapped at her.

“If you must know I genuinely had no idea who he was until after he was hired and trust me when I say I wasn’t particularly thrilled to find out he was a charmed one considering my history with you lot.” Cindy admitted to Piper.

“You mean because your father was Barbas and your sister Barba attacked my grandchildren not so long ago.” Piper told her. “I know you’re not like them and are trying to seek some form of redemption but why do you need to do it around my great grandson?”

“I never wanted to be part of this world or the Underworld but since meeting Drake I’ve found myself tolerating somebody for the first time I even tolerate his detective friend Lacey and that annoying squirrel boy Quinn.” Cindy answered honestly. “Paul and Pan will take some work.”

“If you ever hurt any of them, I will kill you!” Piper warned her. “In fact, I’d kill you now if it wasn’t for the fact history has once again seemed to repeat itself.”

“What is that supposed to mean?” Cindy quizzed the Halliwell Matriarch.

“I think you already know.” Piper responded with a knowing look.

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villa-kulla · 6 years ago

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so I saw Avengers Endgame last night, and honestly.....

I actually frickin’ LOVED it haha, I haven’t genuinely enjoyed one of the Avengers ensemble movies that much since the first one. Granted I’m still very sleep-deprived and on a slightly giddy high from how much it exceeded my expectations haha, and once I’ve thought more about it I’m sure I’ll find things to nitpick. But for the time being, I’m still pretty much swooning.

FULL INCOHERENT THOUGHTS/REACTIONS TO SPECIFIC THINGS BELOW THE CUT, AND OFC, ***SPOILERS*****

ONCE AGAIN: ******SPOILERS********

these are just my rambling Emotions about different moments, ostensibly in the order they occurred in the movie, but actually in the order I remember them:

The opening scene: that moment when Clint turned away from his daughter, and then turned back to see just a few remaining ashes floating slowly where she’d been was beautifully shot. Also beautiful: the soft gasp that went around the theatre right when it happened haha

Killing Thanos within the first 10 minutes and breaking the expected formula and thereby thrusting the movie out into unknown waters? lmao WELL PLAYED, ENDGAME <3

Steve picking up Sam’s mantle and running a support group for survivors? flawless move. My heart couldn’t take it

Okay first thing I genuinely didn’t like: “fat Thor” as a punchline. It was so cringey. My friends and I were discussing how that actually COULD have been so great had they explored Thor’s breakdown and PTSD in a meaningful way, and I mean who wouldn’t adore thicc Thor? But instead we got comedic zooms on his beer belly, and yeah. Kudos to Hemsworth for being a gem and making it work but yeah. Nothing wrong with Thor going to seed physically as well as mentally, just wish it hadn’t been played for laughs is all

Tony basically ripping his heart out and putting it in Steve’s hand? I knew my Vintage™ Stony feels were going to resurface and oh boy did they ever haha

Honestly their whole dynamic in the movies works very well if you imagine that they had angsty hate sex that wasn’t actually hate sex at all, and there was the possibility of real feelings there, but for whatever reason they just couldn’t. quite. make. it. work.

That moment with Antman and Hulk’s fans was so genuinely awkward and I could not stop laughing. Paul Rudd is a gift

It only took them 7 years to realize that all fans ever wanted was the Avengers lounging around in hoodies and eating takeout, but it felt all the more earned for it haha

this is silly but it was nice to have a return to Nat’s red hair...sort of lol

TIME HEIST! TIME HEIST! TIME HEIST! TIME HEIST!!

^^^ That was around when I really started settling in like ‘oh this is gonna be good’

the only spoiler I was exposed to was the ‘Steve’s ass finally gets the recognition it deserves’ post, and did it ever

got as close as we’ll get to canonically bi steve rogers and imma take it haha. Checking out your own ass? Legends only (in fact in our post-movie debrief over drinks, our first toast was ‘here’s to bisexual disaster steve rogers’ he time heisted my heart all over again)

and honestly props to them for going the cute nostalgic route by revisiting all the old movies like that, and not trying to be overly ‘dark and gritty’ for the whole thing. It was lovely how they did it, and very appropriate

The ‘Come and get your love’ credits from GotG is like the only concrete thing I even remember from that movie lol, and I was so giddy when it resurfaced

I’ll be honest, I’m so over aliens and space lol, any time one of these movies goes to space I’m basically yawning instantly, I’M JUST NOT INTO IT FOR THESE MOVIES SORRY. So I’m glad the space stuff was kept to a minimum in this haha. The way they do alien civilizations just never really packs a punch for me, with the single exception of...

......NEBULA MY LOVE <3 She was always the most intriguing and raw of any of the characters in those movies for me. Karen Gillan gives her an amazing presence, so I was glad to see her get a good showcase in this one

Oh hi Robert Redford, I definitely wasn’t reading Butch and Sundance fan fiction on the bus to work 12 hours before this movie asdjhgf haha that was a fun surprise

“Hail Hydra” ajshgd FUCKING EPIC OH MY GOD. I couldn’t breathe. That was amazing.

On a much less lighthearted note.......Natasha. Oh god. I really didn’t think they were going to go there with any of the original six but they did. Natasha was my original fave at the tender of 18, I was completely in awe of how Scarlett portrayed her, immediately cut my hair and dyed it red in tribute haha, and claimed her as my OG fave. I adored her, and still adore her. And honestly, I would have been so much more upset about her fate if...it hadn’t been so completely right for her. As much as I hate to say it, what she did was very character-appropriate for her, and really brought her full circle. And sneaky/unexpected to the end omg. That’s my girl. I’m a diehard Black Widow fan, and I think it’s safe to say she definitely wiped out the red in her ledger, if there ever was any left <3

.....that being said, really, no lingering zoom on a photo of her somewhere at the avengers compound? Nothing? The reaction immediately afterwards was well done, but it was kind of awks that it never came back with even a mention lol

Loved the way they did the ‘Guys...I think it worked’ emphasized only by the sound of birdsong. This movie killed it with the quieter moments

And now for something absolutely not quiet:

STEVE!!!

CAUGHT!!!!

THOR’S!!!!

HAMMER!!!!

I HAVE NEVER HEARD A THEATRE COLLECTIVELY LOSE THEIR SHIT LIKE THAT IN MY LIFE

I may have screamed. So. fucking. aces.

Between ‘Hail Hydra’, ‘That is America’s ass’, and lifting the hammer, Steve really owned this movie didn’t he lol

that’s my boy <3

they may have turned steve’s last movie into an avengers movie, but man alive this avengers movie was pretty much steve’s show and he killed every second of it

I’m giddy just thinking about it

And speaking of giddy, everyone’s return.....normally the big final climactic battle scene tends to pale in comparison to nimbler action sequences that happened earlier, but I said giddy and I meant it. They really pulled out all the crown-pleasing stops in it, and it was impossible to nitpick, I had the biggest fucking smile on my face the whole time

AND OH MAN THAT ONE LITTLE MOMENT WITH DR. STRANGE. HOLDING UP ONE FINGER. WHAT A MOMENT. INCREDIBLE. JAW-DROPPING. VISIONARY. TRANSCENDAENT. UPLIFTING. MY HEART SOARED.

Until......THAT MOMENT

“I am Iron Man”

TONY

Oh god

Everyone speculated it would happen, but I didn’t actually think it would. IDK MAYBE I’M JUST NAIVE LOL.

I was actually kind of numb there for a while and I stayed numb until....

“Your dad liked cheeseburgers too”

Yeah there was no recovering after that lol, I was basically a wreck until the end from that moment on

Man...Tony Stark actually died....

As powerful as it was, I don’t really think they had to go there in order to bring the pathos? Idk I have mixed feelings about that choice lol, his big moment was epic but you know what else is epic? Going back to your log cabin to live with your family in peace lol. Idk I’m still not sure how I feel about their choice with that, but maybe it just hasn’t fully hit me yet

Sam as the new Captain America?? A-fucking-men

And this brings us to the ending

the controversial ending which is already causing its own civil war based on what I’ve seen so far haha. And for what my two cents are worth....

I loved it. That was a bold move and I really have to give them props for choosing something risky and unexpected as a conclusion.

That last shot was absolutely beautiful. The moment ‘It’s Been A Long, Long Time’ kicked in I think my breath caught. And that slow zoom in on the window to see Steve and Peggy dancing 11 years of the Marvel Cinematic Universe to a close, and sealing it with a kiss? Gorgeous.

I’m honestly choked up again just thinking about it lol.

And although it’s a small thing, no end credits sequence?? That’s what we call true closure lol, and I think that was what really hammered in the fact that it’s really all over, folks <3

Yes there were some nit-pickable things, some things that could have been better, or came too little too late, and I can’t even BEGIN to wrap my head around the time-travel implications in the conclusion (and I’m not sure we’re supposed to haha). But they took approximately 9000 storylines and characters and managed to represent them in what was actually a genuinely emotional, thoughtful, and entertaining movie that managed to smash the expected formula and the gently pick it back up again to piece together a satisfying, crowd-pleasing, and soaring resolution. Yeah a good deal of the emotional-payoff was already built in what with audiences bringing their own 10-year journeys with these movies to the theatre, and part of my excitement about this movie is definitely tied into the overall pop culture phenomenon itself. But as a movie it exceeded all my expectations, and I’m very satisfied. Thanks, Marvel. It’s been a good run <3

#spoilers #avengers #avengers endgame #endgame spoilers #shares #MY THOUGHTS AND STUFF #and now i need to sleep lol #the movie finished at 10:30 and i had to work the next day but....we HAD to debrief after something like that lol #how could we not #so add another couple hours to a schoolnight outing WHY NOT #i managed a 4 hour catnap before i was up again to go to work #where i wasn't as dead as i thought i'd be #dead now though lol #but yeah i loved it #i went with 2 other diehard marvel fans and at the end we all turned to each other like #'......they pulled it off O':'#and they did <3 #good times

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smollandtoll · 7 years ago

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HC: 5Hole

TW: this headcanon mentions other people in the NHL including certain Blackhawks and Capitals you might not want to read about. You can skip this one and won’t hurt our feelings OR just read until you get to the section divider that indicates the rest of our HC that doesn’t particularly involve just Sid/Geno.

Have you ever listened to Ariana Grande in the shower and immediately come out with an entire head canon about a Gay Hockey Bar called 5Hole? No? Just me?

So imagine Mario owns this establishment of course and Sid works there as a bartender. He’s perpetually single, mostly because he is super awkward, but also a little because his lower half is always behind the bar. There’s also the fact that he’s hopelessly in love with a regular named Geno and no one wants to get in the middle of whatever epic romance they’re figuring out together.

Geno’s story goes something like: he tried to work at 5hole, but was literally always late, and drank too much while on shift, and was generally the worst bartender because he'd get distracted flirting with patrons instead of y'know working. So he turned into a regular, and is ALWAYS dating someone new/constantly with a boyfriend. Cue Sid being like terribly in love with him from afar for 8 years.

We love a pining Sid - meanwhile Geno’s like, “Sid's good friend! Very cute boy. Weird little bit, but fun to chirp. Flirt with Sid all the time. He never show any interest.” See why no one wants to get in the middle of that? Besides you never know if Sid’s going to do something to one of Geno’s date’s drinks. Like he hasn’t so far, because he’s Sid, but sometimes he looks long and hard at the way they giggle up at Geno from under his arm and takes a really long time to set their drink down on the bar. Anyway Geno's busy having a great time and being young and a mess and missing his family so fiercely he doesn't even think his heart is capable of love any more it's so broken, y’know casual. So he's not looking, not even thinking to look back at Sid because sometimes someone just doesn’t register as a prospect.

Meanwhile Geno is like so scary to Sid, like he's so bright and bold and fearless and like he's got so much drama, with all the people in his life and like the on again off again friendship with Ovi and all the other shit, the Russian politics, the constant internal struggle against self-hatred. He’s always in and out of the bar, always laughing brightly at someone pretty or giving his friends shit and then turning his smile on Sid, and Sid just can’t help but be so drawn to him. Geno is so much, and Sid is so little, he doesn’t think he could compare at all, he doesn’t have deep thoughts or an interesting background, he’s not sexy or silly or fun or any of the other things Geno seems to look for in a date.

He definitely wouldn't know what to do even if some miracle happened and he managed to capture Geno’s affection and attention. To always have the weight of Geno's gaze and possessiveness on him? Like it'd be so nice, but also when he flirts even just a little, Sid always FREEZES. It's been years and he still doesn't know how to handle it. So he’s writing himself off.

But other than the Geno drama, Sid actually really likes being a bartender. It suits him because he can’t flirt (that well) but he can quickly and efficiently prepare drinks when it’s busy af and it’s easy for him to stay low-key and focused. He’s actually the best, he's quick, his eyes never miss anything (he's definitely caught a few doctored drinks), he remembers an infinite amount of orders, he's clean, he's no nonsense, and he's pretty enough to make really decent tips when he smiles even if he can’t flirt worth a damn.

Mario is definitely grooming him to take the bar over - sending him to business school, letting him stay with him indefinitely (this is definitely one of those stories where Sid was like wayward, but not in a terrible way, just a little at loose ends and in need of a decent paying job and Mario swoops in with all the experience and convenient answers). (At this point we got deeply excited by possibilities of other people in this universe and our adorable Sid/Geno plot went off the rails. We just have so many faves, guys!)

Other things about the bar/patrons (stop reading here if you don’t want other people):

Mario is one of those old gays that realized late in life that they COULD be gay, like long after they had a wife and four kids and a career and things. Mario's “one that got away” was probably Gretzky (like, okay, in retrospect, I was in love with him and very in denial about it) and Jagr was probably a young coworker that got along well with him and occasionally experienced a tension-laden moment at a conference or two after a few drinks and was DEEPLY IN LOVE WITH HIM despite Mario explicitly saying "BACK OFF I'M VERY HETERO AND HAVE A WIFE AND BABIES I LOVE." But you know how it is when someone is in so much denial about who they actually are, and Jagr knew, he KNEW. But he also wasn’t self sacrificing enough to stick around waiting only to get burnt over and over while Mario always prioritised his wife.

Basically in this universe, NHL = gay(/bi/pan/poly/aro/ace/various other QUILTBAG abbreviations/occasionally straight because they can’t ALL be gay but like just most of them!). There are a lot of regulars at this bar, and they float in little interest groups and cliques depending on who is dating who and who has what in common - you know like real life. Here are some of the groups and what we think about them.

Jonathan Toews is the other bartender who works in tandem with Sid, because we just imagine this being a super Canadian bar. Jonny is hot and serious and deadpan and if Sid’s the shy (but incredibly competent) one with a great smile then Jonny is the intimidatingly tall and hot one. Regular bar patrons occasionally give guys the DL on the Sid <3 Geno situation - if someone is interested in wooing Geno feel free to hit on him, make out with him, but they usually get warned to grab their drinks from Tazer.

Patrick Kane is one of those self hating gay dudes who comes to the bar to pick up and fuck in the bathroom and then goes back to saying f slurs with his finance bros. He’s probably very angsty and Tazer probably serves him a lot of water and stern looks.

Jamie Benn is one of those gay boys that has no style and doesn't know how to be gay at all. Sid feels for him deeply when he first starts coming in with just the solidarity of his straight brother who kind of abandons him to hustle at pool and watch hockey (hockey is always playing at 5Hole). Tyler Seguin probably swoops in early, takes him for haircuts and makeovers and long late-night heart-to-hearts they pretend are just bro-chats but no one is surprised when it turns out they’re secretly in love with each other.

Flower and Tanger are in some kind of open or poly relationship. As far as Sid can tell, Flower is married to a woman, but a couple times a month he and Tanger come to 5Hole and Tanger goes off to pick up a third guy for Flower’s inspection while Flower shoots the shit with Sid at the bar.

Phil Kessel genuinely comes in for the beer and the hockey and to not hear gay slurs while enjoying them. At first Sid thought maybe he was in the wrong bar and tried to warn him they weren’t a normal hockey bar, but Phil didn’t even look up from the beer menu and scathingly told Sid that he didn’t have his rainbow ID card with him that day, his apologies. After a while they all got used to him being gruff at the bar, focused on the TV more than the company, but still getting hit on relentlessly by like Hags. Phil usually tells him "SURE KID WHATEVER. YOU'RE TOO PRETTY FOR THE LIKES OF ME, MOVE ON." But Hags likes him, and thinks he’s cute and is slowly eroding Phil’s disbelief. Phil deserves love too.

Whenever Hags feels like he’s starting to cross the border into being harassing however it’s okay, he pays for Phil’s drink and then retreats to the corner that is occupied by mostly blonde swedes. Taken into Horny’s open (usually bare and glistening) arms, hair ruffled by Erik Karlsson.

The rest of the Swedes are a small contingent and insanely hot. They usually all break into their individual cliques and return every so often to Nicklas Backstrom’s table where he watches over them all with a stony expression of love, and makes sure the babies don’t get drugged (looking at you Willy Nylander).

There is a similar table of Loud Hot Russians, that is mostly lead by Ovi, and, depending on where their on and off friendship is at, Geno. But obviously Ovi is always like "SID! NICKY HERE?" literally any time he comes in. Ovi is just SMITTEN from the beginning, loving that beautiful impassive man, seeing the WARMTH WITHIN NICKY knowing he NEEDS OVI'S JOVIAL NATURE IN HIS LIFE. Whenever he can say something that gets Nicky to smile it’s 100% worth all his scathing looks and comments and he drunkenly pledges that he’s going to spend the rest of his life trying to make Nicky smile as much as possible. Nicky thinks he’s certifiably insane, but eventually caves and starts hesitantly dating him, and they are definitely instantly the new old married couple at the bar. And then all the Russians and Swedes get strangely intermixed a lot. Geno and Horny being brothers etc.

The Bi Guy club is mostly just Tyler Seguin, Paul Bissonnette talking shit and giggling in a corner and occasionally leaving 5Hole to pick up down the street at the straight club.

IF ANYONE was gonna be part of the drag act that comes in on the first Friday of the month it'd be PK and his Predators. Roman Josi in drag would be so beautiful. Baby gays Kevin and Juuse, longtime queens Pekka and Shea (#denial). Those Preds are so pretty.

Johnny Hockey would be that twinky kid who is like actually maybe too afraid to have sex yet but acting all mature and like he can handle it but he's sEEN SOME FUCKED UP PORN, HE KNOWS ASSHOLES CAN JUST RIP AND HE'S SMALL he's just ANXIOUS. It doesn’t help that he’s deeply hung up on Sean Monahan who runs in the Fuck Boy circle with Tyler Seguin, Tom Wilson, Michael Latta, and Brady Skjei. He is afeared. It’s okay though, Jeff Skinner, and Beau Bennet comfort him and take in Mitch Marner when he wanders in on his 18th birthday.

There’s definitely a kind of low self-esteem but thicc as hell club? President Tyson Barrie, VP Nate Mac, Treasurer Jamie Benn. THEY ARE ALL SO SHY AND WEIRD BUT SO JACKED AND FUNNY??? Gabe's gotta always be tagging along with them because he thinks he fits right in, not because he's ugly or they're ugly but because he thinks they are all smart and funny. And also Tyson is super cute and he is INTO IT. But it like PEEVES Tyson like no other because GABE DOES NOT BELONG.

Tyson: Why does he not spend all his time with the hot swedes, he gets to be hot AND FUNNY. RUDE. Gabe doesn't know how to stay in HIS LANE. THERE IS SUCH THING AS TOO PERFECT GABRIEL. LOOK GABE, GO BACK TO YOUR HOMELAND, LOOK, THAT ONE WHO LOOKS LIKE A PIRATE PROBABLY IS MISSING YOU.

Gabe just exchanges looks with Nate and buys Tyson a very sugary drink (basically anything that ends in -tini) and smiles at him a lot to see him turn increasingly fluorescent shades of red.

Tom Wilson and Michael Latta despite their best intentions as part of the Fuck Boy clique are those guys who have been in a high school sweethearts level committed relationship for EVER AND EVER and everyone is like "maybe you should play the field" and they're like ....I don't think I need to. Because they have everything they need in their meathead bro! Solid sports understanding? Companionship? Twice the wardrobe? A+ blowies??? Done, done and done.

There is also the older distinguished extremely handsome gentleman's society aka Henrik Lundquist and Patrick Sharp. They’re biding their time, eyeing up future Gabe and Holtby. Ovi occasionally tries to set up shop with them and they're like "Good try, you might be silver but you're still like 28."

Thennn idk probably plot would happen like Geno would start dating someone and drama would occur and someone would have to force Sid to talk about his feelings and Geno would realise that he could have had Sid all along BECAUSE WE NEED LOVE.

5HOLE!

#headcanons from the icy void #sid/geno #sidgeno #Hockey RPF

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thegeekerynj · 5 years ago

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An Occasional Attempt to Read, Discuss and Review the Wonders of Comics By: John Rafferty, cranky old man, and Fan of All Things Comics

The Joker 80th Anniversary Special Writers: Various

Artists: Various

‘Oh, I’m sorry, This is the wrong form. You’ll have fill out another one, and go back to the end of the line.... AGAIN.

HAVE A NICE DAY.’

In April 1940, Bob Kane, Bill Finger and Jerry Robinson accidentally birthed the most reviled, revered, iconic villain in all of comics. A character of such amazing insanity, so wondrously psychotic, yet incredibly loyal, and possessed of caustically focused , savant level intellect, as to make him unique, above all others.

Originally known as the Red Hood, a vertical trip to the Ace Chemical acid vats took Jack Napier from failed stand-up comic, failed protector of his wife and unborn child, and turned him into the Clown Prince of Crime, the Joker.

So, here we are, a mere 80 years later, celebrating the legacy of this Master of Mirth and Mayhem.

To say the creators in this spectacular collection bring the crazy does not begin to give credit to the levels of lunacy and abject destruction visited by the tales held within. Ten stories, 10 creative teams, some, marvelous writers with amazing artists, some writer - artist teams uniquely qualified to tell a Joker Story, and Denny O’Neil, with Jose Luis Garcia-Lopez, reclaiming his title as Master of the Batman Story, with what is probably his last story.

10 stories, and not a stinker in the bunch... How in the name of face paint did that happen?? This is unheard of, I mean, there’s usually one story that is sub par, just a filler... but no, every one of them holds up to the shadow cast by the Harlequin of Hate, not one that can be called a filler, or even a second tier story.

Not here.

We start with the ‘after’ story... What happens to the victims, the survivors of the Joker’s mayhem? We are flies on the wall of Dr. Reeder, a psychiatrist put on retainer by one Bruce Wayne, to try to help these victims of collateral violence. In this particular case, the doctor is working with Officer Gary Dell, who is suffering from PTSD, as well as physical trauma, as the Clown saw it to remove enough of Dell’s facial structure to make it look like he is grinning a Joker grin...

Skipping the second story for the moment, we jump tp ‘Kill The Batman’, which asks the basic question, ‘What happens when your entire purpose for living life has been taken away?’. Strangely enough, the answers will surprise, and sometimes horrify the reader.

Next up, ‘Introducing The Dove Corps’, which for this reviewer, was the hardest story to both read, and be impartial about. This story, written by the late Denny O’Neil, is possibly the last Batman story written by one of the most prolific, and awarded writers in Comics History ( Mr. O’Neil passed away on Friday, 6/12, just before the reviewer sat down to read and review this collection). This man, having written the Joker many times over his 50 years in Comics, brought a sense of whimsy to the character, who tried to become a ��non-violent warrior’, with both unexpected, and totally expected results.

This collection, as with any collection concerning the Joker, would not be complete without the requisite Harley story.

While I have a history of complaining about the appearance of Harleen Quinzell in just about every book in the DC Print line (still waiting to see her show up in Basketful of Heads... reading Issue 7 later...), in this group of stories it is totally appropriate, expected... and a neat, little story. Harley, bad dreams, and Joker insomnia... well, we can expect mayhem, and we get it, in face cards! Thank you Paul Dini, for writing the characters you love so well...

The rest of the stories, while just as good deserve, no, need to be read to be fully appreciated. These stories all touch on different aspects of the psyche of the Joker, his violent tendencies, his memories, or rather his rather fluid ‘quasi-memories’, his diabolical sense of humor, and his twisted senses of justice and loyalty...

Yes, LOYALTY.

Read his stories, the Joker exhibits a sense of loyalty to his henchmen, twisted though it may be, like a rabid hyena... but it is a loyalty unrivaled.

Before closing out, no, I haven’t forgotten. Let’s address that second story, the one I made a point to avoid earlier... Yes, this one...

‘What Comes After A Joke’, the story by James Tynion IV and Mikal Janin, asks the question that has been delayed for 3 months due to the COVID - 19 lockdowns, and answers it with the origin of the most awaited character in many years, Punchline. Yes, Gentle Readers, the first origin of Punchline is here, in the pages of the Special... seems appropriate, don’t you think?

Wonder how many times this will be retconned...

Anyway, here’s my take, for what it’s worth... The story as a story is great. The origin is told as a conversation between two characters, pretty straight forward, no dancing around, or anything. The dialogue is truly organic, the reader could imagine themselves being a third person in the room, listening to these two people discussing what led to the creation of the character.

Here’s my problem... I’m just not impressed with the character.

Just another knife wielding psycho, with emo-torn stocking, and mime-puppet makeup, one with villain worship issues.

I think she was done a whole lot better as Marionette in Doomsday Clock, and at least, SHE had a reason for her murder spree.

Now, she may grow on me, but to start, she certainly ain’t a Harleen Quinzell... and I had her story to compare to, written by Paul Dini ( and then I went and watched ‘Mad Love’). Now it might just be the hyped because of it, I’m anticipating more, but right now, I’m left wanting...

Other than this, which I will not hold against the book, it’s entirely worth the 9.99 cover price... sticker shock be damned!

And did I mention the Sienkiewicz Joker cover ??? OMG!!!

Out of 5 🌶 🌶🌶🌶🌶🌶

#comic books #comics #dc comics #joker #joker 80th anniversary

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thesrr · 8 years ago

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My Review on the WWE Royal Rumble

Decided to give my thoughts on the WWE Royal Rumble since this is the first day fully back from Ponycon. So if you haven’t seen it yet, I recommend you do before reading. Or if you’re like me and don’t care for spoilers, go ahead.

NXT TakeOver: San Antonio

To me, the big 4 PPVs don’t start an hour earlier. They start a day earlier with NXT TakeOver. These are like PPVs themselves and sometimes even better than the Big 4. So I’m going to review them alongside the Royal Rumble and treat them all as one big event. Because they are.

Eric Young Vs Tye Dillinger

Been a fan of Eric Young even in TNA. While him winning the world Championship was definitely copying Daniel Bryan, he did deserve it. Nice to see him not do a joke gimmick in the WWE so people new to him can treat him seriously from the start. As for Tye, he has grown on me. To think, only Stonecold and DB were capable of getting one word over and he joins them with “10″.

Nice to see Eric give him one more chance to join. Made it seem he really did want him to join Sanity. But seeing how Tye rejected it was really smart. You can’t disqualify someone for giving back their jacket. If Tye does indeed move to the Main Roster, this is a great completion of his time in NXT. I’m not a fan of heels with minions but I could when done right. And Sanity I felt is done right.

They’re big an intimidating, but they’re not the sole reason Eric Young wins matches. Eric Young is capable of winning his own battles (through underhanded tactics but still on his own). They’re not someone who shows up in the final moments of the match and makes it easy for the heel to win. Overall, an excellent opening to the rest of TakeOver and the Royal Rumble in general.

Samoa Joe in the Audience

If I saw this live, I would have thought “if he’s there, that means he MUST be appearing at the Rumble.” Sadly, I would be wrong.

Roderick Strong Vs Andrade Almas

While I heard of Roderick Strong, I sadly never seen him wrestle outside the WWE. Seeing him has been impressive so far. Andrade Almas I felt was smart to go heel. As a face, he didn’t provide much impact. Especially when he got overshadowed by others coming into NXT. He has been working better as a heel than a face.

The two work really well together. Almas was a fun cocky heel while Strong at times lived up to his name and more by being also pretty agile and quick. Awesome match overall. Both of them would be awesome to see on Raw or Smackdown.

The Authors of Pain Vs DIY

Outside having Paul Ellering as a manager, I don’t see them being a Road Warriors ripoff. I see this more of Paul wanting to be known more than that guy who managed the Road Warriors. He want to be the guy known for managing champions. And unlike the Disciples of Apocalypse, these two definitely have the look of being Tag Team Champions. I just didn’t like how they won the later rounds of the Dusty Rhodes Tournament. Makes them look weak when they really aren’t.

DIY are frikkin impressive alone and together. They were the Match of Round 1 and possibly even the Entire Tournament of the Cruiserweight Classic. And seeing them take on The Revival all those times proved they have what it takes as single competitors or a team. 206, Raw, Smackdown, these two definitely deserve a call up.

The match told a good story. When DIY were in control, they had a strong intensity and excitement. When AoP were in control, they told the story of big men Vs smaller men very well in both having the advantage and losing it. Seeing Tommaso German Suplex both of them one after another was awesome! That double submission being broken was also an awesome spot!

This is how the AoP should have won the Dusty Classic: by just being dominate. Definitely beatable, but still showing they could dominate. I hope these two teams collide again in the future. So far, the current match were superior to the previous. I wonder if this can keep up.

Seth Rollins invades NXT

More evidence that TakeOver is part of the Big 4 Events. While this could have been done in the Royal Rumble, seeing it part of NXT really shows how close NXT is to the Main Stage. Would love to see more of this sometimes. Maybe a special event where some NXT stars take on WWE Main Stage ones. The Revival Vs America Alpha would show why both teams are a must see. Joe Vs Styles in the WWE. Sanity Vs Wyatts. A lot of fun possibilities without the need to call them up.

Asuka Vs Nikki Cross Vs Billie Kay Vs Peyton Royce

Asuka is fun: nuff said. Can’t tell if she is a heel or a face but I love the fact that when she asked for a match that she demanded all of them. I don’t remember much of Nikki prior to being in Sanity, but talk about making a nice change. This new gimmick is very fun.

Billy and Peyton, on the other hand, I’m not a fan of. As I said before, I prefer heels who can do things on their own. Either by being completely dominate like the AoP did or being sneaky on their own like Eric Young or the Miz. These two do it in a way I dislike: unable to do anything themselves unless they have numbers. Take away the numbers and they are not a threat and honestly not worthy of a title shot.

And the opening proved it as the two acted more like scared children than wrestlers. They also ruin Asuka and Nikki face each other. When those two collide, its frikkin fun! Intensity Vs Insanity. But when Billie and Peyton join, it slows it down and they continue to work as a team. Its like you have two high speed cars in a race but they have to stop to allow two kids on a tandem bike to catch up.

I will say the Double Suplex off the Announce Table was a cool spot. And in another positive, unlike Jericho and Owens, the two actually didn’t care who got the pin. As long as they have the belt in their possession. But if they didn’t care who won, why not allow one to pin the other? Most likely because neither one wanted to be the one pinned, so pinning the champion would prove their dominance.

But I am glad Asuka defeated the pair while Nikki was taken out via Double Suplex off Announcer Table to Table. It made sure those two are out of the title hunt because they both failed to defeat her and Nikki can get an actual one on one match in the future.

Bobby Roode Vs Shinsuke Nakamura

All I’ve seen on Shinsuke was what he has shown in the WWE. And the first moment he arrived, I believed he was made to be on the Main Stage of the WWE. It was like Japan wanted to design their version of a WWE Superstar and Shinsuke Nakamura is that final product. He is probably going to have the greatest Wrestlemania Entrance ever in the future.

Bobby Roode I saw a lot in TNA. My first real taste of him turning heel was after the first ever TNA event where the winner of a grueling tournament would face the champion. Bobby Roode won that, only to lose the match at the PPV. That was bad in itself, but it got even worse when James Storm, his partner at the time, WON THE TITLE on TV after that. After that, Roode turned heel and won the title. It would have been so much smarter to just have Roode win it all and then turn heel.

But I blame TNA for that and not Bobby Roode. As part of Beer Money I felt the two had a license to print money. As a heel he was great. And now as NXT, he definitely lives up to his new theme song and is Glorious. Though of his three entrances, this one was weaker than his other two TakeOver entrances. Eight ladies kind of pale in comparison with having an actual choir sing your theme song or descending from above to enter the ring.

It was a fun match until the ending. I do hope it was planned and not a real injury. Would hate to see this take Nakamura out of action. But either way, I am glad to see Bobby Roode as Champion in the WWE. If Shinsuke isn’t injured and this is storyline, I do hope we get to see these two again in the future.

Pre-Show

Now the Day of the PPV. NXT was awesome! But can the WWE Royal Rumble itself live up to that hype? Let’s see with the matches that weren’t officially on the card.

Becky Lynch, Nikki Bella, and Naomi Vs Alexa Bliss, Mickie James, and Natalya

There is a lot of people here. Becky is fun. Nikki has been proving herself. And Naomi’s entrance, I hate to say, is more exciting than her. I like Alexa Bliss. She makes a unique heel. Mickie back in the WWE is fun to see. Thanks to her time on the Independent Circuit and TNA, she still has the chops. So weird that Natalya is a heel. As coach, she had a great face gimmick. Sure, it was humorous but it would have gotten over. Considering Tamina is back to full health, I would have had her be the one to attack Nikki.

First, Mickie definitely needs a new theme song. So use to hearing her theme song being more country thanks to her time in TNA. Second, all these story lines in one match? Maybe just have one of them being the pre-show and the others handled in the next PPV. Third, I wish they had an all women Royal Rumble. With the talk of the Woman’s Revolution, it would be cool to see a Full Rumble dedicated to the Wrestlers themselves.

As for the match itself, that Triple Suplex was a fun spot. Other then that, it was an alright match. Definitely a downgrade after seeing all the TakeOver matches minutes ago. Luckily it wasn’t Mickie or Natalya who were pinned or Becky and Nikki getting the pin. This give Naomi the idea of a singles match at the Elimination Chamber PPV that they have been building up. If Mickie were pinned by Becky or Natalya was pinned by Nikki here, it would have watered down their feuds.

Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson Vs Cesaro and Sheamus

I did enjoy Gallows in the WWE prior to his return. While being Kane was terrible (mostly because of the wig), his time with CM Punk was great. Festus was alright for a gimmick but seeing his real self was much better for him. In TNA, he was in Aces and Eights which I felt was a terrible fraction. Like I said with Billy and Peyton, I hate heels that relies on numbers. And I felt he had the same belief as he left TNA.

Now with Karl Anderson, they became part of the Bullet Club. While I haven’t seen much outside bits in ROH, even I heard of them. And they have been a good team but sadly haven’t gotten the chance to shine until recently. They definitely need a Team Name though. The Club is when they were with AJ Styles (as an allusion to the Bullet Club).

Speaking of teams who could use a Team Name: Cesaro and Sheamus. I frikkin enjoy Cesaro, especially in recent time. He makes a great singles competitor and has a lot of fun matches. And even in this situation, he still provides fun. Sheamus I have no real problem with. As a face or a heel, he does his job the best he can. I just am tired to see these two together, be it a team or against each other. I feel they both need to move on to something different.

I like the idea of two referees out there. It would make annoying finishes harder to pull off legitimately since we get a ref not distracted by a wrestler. Downside is we don’t get to see the teamwork of heels due to the fact they can’t attack the wrestler while their partner in the ring is being pushed away by the ref.

As for the match itself, I barely notice the second referee except a few times. This could have been a regular tag team match. Besides that, it was a better match than the 3 on 3 but still down from AoP Vs DIY. But I am glad to see Gallows and Anderson finally win the Tag Team Titles.

Nia Jax Vs Sasha Banks

Sasha is definitely fun. Shame she never got the chance to shine as Women’s Champion. Instead, we see her continually choke on the PPVs. As for Nia, I always liked powerful women. I was hoping to see Awesome Kong (Kharma) be successful but sadly things were out of everyone’s hands. Nia did a great job during NXT and I hope she gets that treatment I was hoping to see in WWE.

As for the match itself, it felt like a TV match than a PPV match. Makes sense since this is not the PPV. Technically a stomp for Nia to prove her dominance. So if she were to ever actually go for the Women’s Title, she would have steam behind her.

The Royal Rumble PPV

So far, NXT TakeOver was Superior to the Pre-Show. But then again, the Pre-Show is not the PPV itself. So can its four single matches match or surpass the ones on NXT?

Charlotte Flair Vs Bayley

Charlotte is a mix bag for me. When she’s alone, I feel she is a great heel. But when she was with someone (be it her father or Dana Brooke), I feel she is a terrible one. Like I said, I like my heels who can win on their own: be it dominance or using tricks. Those two directly interfere in the finish making it worse for me. Bayley I hoped would win the title here. Her character is fun and her last set of matches on TakeOver were great! I am hoping she would get the same kind of success on the Main Roster as she did in NXT.

For the match itself, it was pretty good. A little botchy in the beginning but some great moves from both of them (like the Back Slide Reversal from Charlotte). Definitely better than the NXT Women’s Match because they didn’t have to drag two others with them. And Charlotte goes for a dominance victory with a Natural Selection to the apron. Shame Bayley lost cleanly, but she was defeated by a strong attack like that and that at least doesn’t lower her rankings in my book.

Kevin Owens Vs Roman Reigns

I haven’t seen Kevin Steen prior to the WWE, but he has been a fun heel in NXT and his feud with John Cena. Sadly, as Universal Champion he has been hampered with being a bad heel due to needing the assistance. Kevin definitely can be a dominate heel and he has in the past. But honestly he has to stop being Besties with Jericho and be the show.

I don’t really have a problem with Roman. I believe he has been pushed too soon. And I can see why people dislike Roman due to all the “shoving him down our throats”. Hopefully he can develop into his own in the future and actually be a face people can get behind.

Why is the Shark Cage above the Ring? If I was Foley and I saw NXT’s attempt, I would have kept it away from the ring to prevent any shenanigans like throwing down brass knuckles like they did. But in this case, it didn’t matter because it was also No-DQ. That kind of makes the entire “Keep Jericho Out of the Match” pointless. Because being above the ring and ready to drop a weapon pretty much means he was still there in the match.

The match itself, being a No-DQ match, was fun to see. Lots of fun spots with the biggest being KO Frog Splash Roman through a Table on the Outside. But one of the spots had me worried and that was Kevin Owens falling down onto the Tower of Chairs. I really hate spots like these because I fear it would seriously injure them or worse. I only recently got over them breaking Ladders after someone revealed those are specifically made of wood.

The biggest downer was Braun Strowman. At the end, he showed up and attacked Roman Reigns. Once again, despite having the opportunity to show his dominance the writers decide to make him win because of others. And even ignoring that, why Strowman? Was he still upset with the Double Spear or the Spear in that Three on Three? If the first, why not attack Goldberg when he came out? This wouldn’t be the last time I question the Storytelling.

Neville Vs Rich Swann

I enjoyed Neville as a face. But now that he is a heel, he has definitely improved character wise. His look and his moves definitely makes the Heel turn legit. Rich Swann is fun and exciting in the ring. I was really hoping he would retain the title. But unlike other matches, I wouldn’t have mind if Neville won. This was a match where either outcome would be a positive for me.

The match was exciting and excellent. Neville is definitely the big star of 205 Live. And to see him win by submission showed that he doesn’t need the Red Arrow or to go off the top. He just wants to to inflict more damage.

John Cena Vs AJ Styles

I have no real problem with Cena. He does a lot for the WWE so he deserves to be their poster boy. AJ Styles definitely lives up to being phenomenal. In TNA, he was the reason you had to watch it. Even after being Mini-Flair, he was still great in the ring. TNA made a grave mistake to letting him go. Seeing him in the WWE so soon had me worried. But eventually in the end he became World Champion, something I never expected.

I am still surprised how well the two work together. I will say that sometimes Cena does heelish tactics. Would this lead to an actual heel turn or is he trying to add some edge? Overall, best singles match of the PPV alone.

The Royal Rumble Event

Possibly the most stacked card ever. And the potential of surprise entrants are numerous. How did it do? Let’s go over it by elimination.

Jack Gallagher - Entry #5

I was hoping to see this guy be one of the competitors. Outside the Neville story line, he was the highlight of 205 Live. Sadly, his time was too short and he was the first one eliminated when #6 entered the match. But for the brief time he was there, he was a joy to watch.

Mojo Rawley - Entry #4

Mojo is a fun guy in a Tag Team and most likely fun at parties. But as a singles competitor he could use work. Honestly, despite winning the Battle Royal to get in, I was hoping he would be the first one gone. But he lasted longer than Jack and that makes me sad.

Big Cass - Entry #1

He’s pretty good for a big guy, but I like him better with Enzo than a solo act. Sadly, we didn’t get to see the two together because he was eliminated right after Mojo.

Kalisto - Entry #3

I was rooting for him to win the Crusierweight for Smackdown. Sadly, his lost means Raw is also after Smackdown. He’s fun but really needs to be with others his own weight class. But man, that is a lot of height for his elimination.

Mark Henry - Entry #6

Like the three before, Mark was also eliminated by Strowman. I grew up watching Henry from his blue tights being an Olympic hero to being a member of the Nation to Sexual Chocolate and everything between. He definitely deserves a Hall of Fame shot in my book.

The Big Show - Entry #9

Big Show looked good. I believe them when they say this is the most fit he has been in some time. But surprisingly he was there pretty short. Another victim of the Strowman Push.

James Ellsworth - Entry #11

I knew he is a joke entry. I have them a bunch of times in my own Rumble. His spot was funny and that was an impressive bump he took when being eliminated. But I think I am done with the joke Ellsworth. How is the real Ellsworth?

Tye Dillinger - Entry #10

Another guy I wanted to see and even in the exact spot I was hoping for. I was hoping he would last a little longer but sadly he was soon eliminated.

Braun Strowman - Entry #7

As I type this, I am watching Raw. It was there that they explained, with a clip I totally forgot, that Kevin Owens promised him a title shot after beating Reigns. And Strowman took that as legit. Amazing how one promo can change the results of a match. As for his elimination, I’ll talk about that more when I get to the person he was eliminated by.

The New Day - Kofi #14, Big E #17, Woods #20

Even though they have been around for a long time, I still enjoy their work. Even Woods with his Up Up Down Down channel on Youtube. But for an event that says “Friend Vs Friend”, there is very little friends going on. In fact, these two practically went out at the exact same time.

Cesaro & Sheamus - Entry #19 and #16

Speaking of which, so did they. That is until the final moments. A funny bit was Cesaro getting dizzy hitting everyone with the Big Swing and almost getting Sheamus. But those final moments saw them going against each other and lead to both of them being gone.

Apollo Crews - Entry #22

I feel sorry for Crews. He is definitely good but he was brought up from NXT way too soon. And his time in the Rumble makes that same suggestion. He should probably go back to NXT and wait before WWE actually have a plan with him.

Dean Ambrose - Entry #12

I don’t mind the comedy bits of Dean. I still enjoy him. I just like the Miz better as IC Champion.

Dolph Ziggler - Entry #24

Ziggler’s chase for the IC title bored me. Besides one time, the Miz always had the upper hand. It is because Miz has a clever use of his wife while Ziggler hits a Glass Ceiling that is invisible. I am glad he turned heel, but in this Rumble you don’t see it.

Enzo Amore - Entry #27

Talk about a quick time. Like Big Cass, I prefer him with Cass than alone. And his time was quick thanks to Lesnar.

Brock Lesnar - Entry #26

I knew Lesnar wasn’t going to win, but I expected him to at least be the one to Eliminate Goldberg to set up that Wrestlemania Final Match. Instead, Goldberg came in and quickly eliminated him. That shocked me.

Rusev - Entry #18

Poor Rusev. He has a lot going for him but things just don’t turn out well for him. At least he lasted longer than others.

Baron Corbin - Entry #13

I wasn’t a fan of him before, even when he turned heel. But he has been growing on me. One thing I wanted to see at Survivor Series 2016 was Strowman Vs Corbin. Of the two, I prefer Corbin. My wish failed because of Shane McMahon. But in this rumble, I finally got to see Baron take on Strowman. And with a little help, Corbin was the one to eliminate him. He lasted pretty long too. Maybe in the future he’ll be a World Champion.

Luke Harper - Entry #25

I am honestly surprised that Luke was the one to betray the Wyatt Family. I swear it was going to be Orton and Harper would prove his loyalty. But if he does decide to go solo, here’s hoping he doesn’t return again to the Wyatt Family.

Goldberg - Entry #28

Goldberg did more in this Rumble than his match against Lesnar. But despite what they set up and planned, I am looking forward to seeing Goldberg Vs The Undertaker than either of those other two matches.

The Miz - Entry #15

I was hoping the Miz would win. He is my current favorite wrestler. In that match, practically everyone who entered hit the Miz with one of their best moves. Speared, F5ed, Chokeslammed... While Jericho lasted longer overall, the Miz was in that ring much longer.

Sami Zayn - Entry #8

Zayn is a fun guy and I’ve seen matches of him outside WWE. I am glad he lasted as long as I did but I was hoping to see him at least in the Final Four. Oh well.

The Undertaker - Entry #29

With Goldberg, Lesnar and the Undertaker entering when they did, I was wondering who would be #30. They wouldn’t have done that unless the surprise of the 30th Entrant was worth it. But honestly, it wasn’t. Especially because that person eliminated the Undertaker to set up a Wrestlemania match.

Chris Jericho - Entry #2

I am a big fan of Jericho. He was the first heel I ever cheered for. And in this Rumble, he surpassed Triple H by lasting almost 5 hours in total. Sadly, he didn’t do much as he spent a good number of time outside.

Bray Wyatt - Entry #21

I enjoy Wyatt. Love his gimmick and his group. While I question the entry of Orton into the fray, it does seem to be working for him. And Final 3 is a great spot to be in.

Roman Reigns - Entry #30

I was upset that Reigns was #30. While the possibility that Joe or Finn would be in the Rumble stung, the real issue was one thing: HOW?!? In story, McMahon hates Reigns. And she was definitely in charge of who enters the Rumble. So how on Earth did she okayed Reigns to enter? So far he hasn’t appeared on Raw so unless he becomes a heel working with the Authority, I don’t like the fact he did enter the Rumble.

Winner: Randy Orton - Entry #23

And our winner is the 7th Two Time Winner. Orton has his ups and down but he seems to be doing well in the Wyatt Family. But now that he won the title, what is gonna happen? Well, we’ll find out when Smackdown is on Tomorrow. I honestly expected him to be the betrayer in this PPV. Looks like I was wrong

Overall

Overall, it was a fun Weekend for Wrestling Fans. TakeOver was awesome and the Rumble was still fun. Now I am looking forward to do my own.

#wwe royal rumble #WWE #WWE NXT #wwe nxt takeover #royal rumble #royal rumble 2017

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ohblackdiamond · 5 years ago

Text

little t&a (paul/gene, nc-17) (part 14 of 29)

Paul was still trying to remember the times he’d slept with her even as he looked her over. Brownish hair in a grown-out shag, that sort of dirty light brown color that made it obvious she’d probably been towheaded as a kid, blue eyes, freckles in heaps across her nose and cheekbones. Icepick scars ran down one cheek on close inspection, reminiscent of Ace’s, pitting up her complexion. The remnants of measles or acne. She was very small, easily at least a head shorter than him, even now. Skinny figure, accentuated in a pair of jeans and a halter top. So much for the dress code he’d rambled about that morning. Younger than him, if he were going to take a guess. Not—not substantially so, maybe three or four years. She wasn’t beautiful at all, but she had that blandly cute girl-next-door look about her that sometimes was its own ticket of admission.

He’d been working towards this for days, and he didn’t know what to say. He didn’t know how to approach her. The doorman had already backed away, disappearing as soon as he’d realized Gene saw the girl. Paul’s palms were sweating worse now than during the dance; he felt like he was about to sing at Shea Stadium. He felt Gene’s hand on his back, urging him, and finally he stepped forward and spoke.

"Hi, Carol."

She didn’t recognize him. He could tell by the way her eyes flickered from him to Gene, measuring him up. She was probably thinking that Gene was adding up girls for a threesome. She smiled in a distant, vague way, holding her hand up in a wave.

“Hi.”

“We need to talk,” Paul said, but she shook her head and turned to Gene.

“The guy at the door said Paul Stanley wanted to see me, too.”

“I do.”

“What?”

“I do want to see you.”

She looked at him. Really looked at him, staring him dead in the eye. Her mouth opened. She looked—she almost looked afraid.

“Oh, my God.” A breath. “Paul?”

Paul nodded.

“It worked? It really—” Carol stopped herself. Her gaze inched down from his face to his chest, Paul’s stomach curdling as her focus moved further down—it had never felt that bad before, being looked at, but being looked at by her felt absolutely awful, like he was a specimen or an experiment. “Did it go all the…”

“Do I look like I’ve got anything else there?”

She actually flinched, shaking her head. He hadn’t expected that. Thought sure she’d be gleeful as soon as she realized who he was.

“We want to talk to you.” Gene, still next to him. Paul glanced at him briefly. The lipstick smeared on his mouth and neck had to make him seem far less threatening, but Carol seemed at least a little cowed anyway. “You know exactly why.”

“I… I don’t want to talk to you. I only want to talk to Paul.”

“That’s too damn bad,” Gene snapped, but Paul raised his hand.

“No. That’s fine. We’ll talk privately.”

“Paul, I don’t think—”

“Gene, it’s okay.”

He didn’t really think it was okay, being alone with this girl. No matter how small and timid she was, that didn’t change what she’d done, what she was capable of. But he thought he’d stand a better chance of getting the curse removed if Gene wasn’t there staring daggers into her. Whatever he’d done to Carol, however he’d hurt her, it was up to him to try and smooth over, not Gene. Gene, who still hadn’t withdrawn his hand from Paul’s shoulder.

“Paul, don’t be stupid.”

“I’m not being stupid.” He turned to Carol. “Look, we’ll go to the basement and talk this over there, all right?” He’d almost bet she was familiar with that basement. Mary-Anne had said she wanted to be the next Pamela des Barres, hadn’t she? She’d probably gotten with dozens upon dozens of rockstars.

Except that didn’t feel right. There wasn’t that—Pamela’d been before his time, but Connie Hamzy, even Bebe Buell, and the weird entourage of girls he’d almost started to recognize when he’d tour parts of America over again, they all had some sort of—charm and self-confidence propping them up, at least for as long as it took to come. This girl seemed totally devoid of that. This girl reminded him, uncomfortably, of—

“Okay.”

“What?”

“I said okay. We can go downstairs.” Carol glanced, haltingly, at Gene. “I won’t hurt him.”

Gene’s expression was wary. Paul couldn’t blame him. He clasped Gene’s arm, briefly.

“I’ve got to do this myself, all right? I’ll be right back.” He squeezed Gene’s arm; for a second, just a stupid second, he wanted to kiss him. Like they really were together. Like they’d… like they’d really shared something beyond an evening and a few dances and a few kisses not five minutes ago. Something in Paul’s stomach felt all mangled, whether because he couldn’t manage to do it or because he wanted to, he wasn’t sure. Gene inclined his head in a slight nod.

“You’ve got twenty minutes.” Gene was directing the words at Carol, not Paul. “I’m coming down there if he’s not back by then.”

Paul started to say he didn’t have a watch, but Gene was unlatching his own and putting it in his hand before he could. The silver felt heavy in his palm, heavy and warm from Gene’s skin. It was just as well that he hadn’t tried to put it on him; it would’ve been loose enough to be laughable. Paul nodded.

“I’ll see you, Gene. C’mon.”

It felt weird, going anywhere without Gene at his side. Made him feel bare, somehow. Two girls walking together down the VIP floor, without anything recognizable about either of them, was ironically enough to garner quick glances from the people around. Paul sped up his steps more than he needed to, dimly satisfied at the way Carol was having to scurry to keep up with him, heading down the stairs to the main dancefloor, and then past that, to the basement.

He’d thought a doorman might be there to block the way for non-VIPs, but there was no one at all. Maybe Ace had been right when he’d said Rubell’s workers were as loaded as he was. Maybe they were just lucky. He wouldn’t question it, holding the railing in one hand, Gene’s watch in the other. Twenty minutes. He stood at the foot of the steps, waiting on Carol, and then, once she’d descended, started knocking on the doors that lined the basement. A whole hallway full of them. He didn’t stop knocking until he came to a door where he didn’t hear an answer back, and he opened that door, turning on the light, looking the room up and down before gesturing for Carol to come inside, and then shutting the door on them both.

The room was small, the carpet dirty and full of ground-in glitter and smeared stains. There was a coke spoon on the floor, a box of tissues, and a bare king-sized mattress. Studio 54’s luxury basement suites, tawdry and disgusting as a tenement. With nowhere else to sit, Paul lowered himself onto the mattress next to Carol, sitting on one corner while she sat on the other. Her knees were bent, ankles up against the side of the mattress. His legs were stretched out but closed on the floor, more from concern about what might be crawling around on the carpet than any lousy efforts at ladylike fakery.

It wasn’t the way he’d wanted to confront her, in a grimy little room, wearing a dress that made it seem, maybe, like he wanted to be like this. Odd as it was after what she’d done, she seemed almost like she was the one afraid of him. She didn’t say a word at first, just looked at him, gaze right on his face now, hands resting her knees, watching him as he put on Gene’s watch, having to clasp it several inches below his wrist just to keep it from falling off. He wondered what she was seeing, if she had a better idea of what was under the surface than Gene did, just by virtue of having done this to him. He wondered if she was disappointed, when she finally spoke.

“You look nice.”

Paul didn’t answer.

“I didn’t think you’d look that nice.”

“Did you think I’d come out here in a sack?”

She bit her lip, flinching, shaking her head. For a bizarre moment she looked like she was about to apologize to him, and then she seemed to steady herself.

“I was just surprised. I didn’t really think it would turn out.”

“Well, it did.” Paul couldn’t manage to catch himself. He was scared, sure, but he was pissed-off, too. He’d counted on her crowing over the damage like some corny Batman villain. That would’ve been so easy to smart back at. But this fragile slip of a girl that still seemed cowed by him—this girl, instead, at the crux of all his problems—there was no satisfaction in snapping at her, any more than there’d be from tearing a piece of paper or blowing out a candle. “Carol—what the hell did I even do to you to deserve this?”

Carol shook her head again, rubbing her hands up and down her jean-clad thighs, like an anxious athlete, like she was trying to gear herself up, almost. The words seemed to tumble out of her throat, like pebbles and shells pushed out by the tide.

“Y-you don’t even know. Mary-Anne said you wouldn’t. She said I could try whatever weird hex I wanted, and you’d never know who did it to you, or why. I guess she was half-right.”

“Are you going to tell me? Look, Carol, whatever it was, I’m—”

“You’re sorry?” She shook her head. Her face was starting to flush, body stiffening. That weakness to her, that fear, seemed to be fading out, blue eyes narrowed. Every sentence seemed to be fueling her, getting louder and louder. “You think you can just apologize and I’ll reverse it for you? Y-you can just stare at me real sad and I’ll feel bad for you?”

“I can’t apologize if I don’t know what I did!”

“That’s your whole damn problem! That’s all of it!” Carol reached over, grabbing his arm. He was too surprised to jerk away. She let go for him, after a squeeze that, even now, in this body, was hardly tight enough to hurt at all. “You don’t know anything! You aren’t anything! People—people wanna be like you! Girls wanna sleep with you! They think there’s something you’ve got that they can get at, but there’s not!”

“What are you talking about?”

Her lip was wobbling, her face completely red, all the way to her neck. He was hoping she was high, hoping he had some leverage, somehow. He didn’t think she was.

“You know what they say about you in the magazines?” she blurted. “They say you’re so, so sensitive. They say you’re shy. That you’re wanting to commit to someone, but you just haven’t found the right girl yet.”

“That’s—”

“I believed it.” Carol bit her lip. “I believed all of it. W-why shouldn’t I have believed it? What the hell else did I have going for me? I was flunking out of college.”

“I’m… I’m sorry.”

“You’re not sorry at all! You’re just sorry I did this to you!”

“I—” Paul started, then swallowed the rest. She was right. But more than that, he wasn’t in a position to argue her on anything. She could make him a girl permanently. Or do something even worse to him. Better to try and let her get it all out.

The funny thing was, the sad thing was, he wasn’t sure how. He wasn’t used to anyone spilling on him. Peter, maybe, in the early days, but besides him… people didn’t confide in him. Even Gene didn’t. Luckily, the girl didn’t need any prodding.

“I was flunking out of college,” she repeated, quieter now. “My dad had just died. That’s how I got into the occult. I’d try and contact him. But I never got him. That was two years ago.”

Paul opened his mouth to apologize again, then, figuring she’d yell, he reached over, hesitantly vying for her hand. Her mouth wobbled, and she yanked her hand back before he’d even grasped it.

“My mom was… trying to get me to withdraw from all my classes and come home. But I didn’t. I just kept skipping them. I’d go downtown, watch movies, go to the record store. That’s when I saw you.”

“Were we doing a signing?”

“Yeah. But I hadn’t heard of you. I was just there to buy an album.”

“What album?”

“Have You Never Been Mellow.”

Oh, God. Paul managed a tight smile.

“Olivia Newton-John.”

“That’s right. I-I wasn’t going to get your album, ’cause I didn’t know who you were, but… you were all at the front of the store, and—I was holding her album, and… you waved at me.” Her voice had softened up as she kept going, that hard edge whittling to nothing. “It’s stupid.”

He wanted to agree. It was outstandingly stupid. If every girl he’d ever waved at hated him half as much as this chick did, he’d have been hung, drawn, and quartered years ago. But the look in her eyes was so miserable, and his body was so heavily on the line, that he couldn’t manage a word.

“That’s not why I did this to you, anyway. I got your album and all of you signed it. Dressed to Kill. You were right at the end—then you… you said you had a show tomorrow. So I went and—”

“And I picked you up after, right?”

She snorted.

“No. I was too far back. You didn’t even see me.” Her hand was on the mattress now. “But that’s what got it started. I’d get all the music magazines. I kept looking out for KISS. I-I wanted to know all about you.”

“Just because I spoke to you?” Paul swallowed, shook his head. “Carol… Carol, KISS was nothing back then. If Alive hadn’t been a hit, we—”

“You were something to me. I didn’t care what you were to anybody else.” Carol wasn’t looking him in the eye. She was staring at the floor, or maybe at his heels, her voice almost on the verge of wobbling again. “My… my roommate, she—she still had that old Mark Spitz poster on the wall. The one with where he’s wearing all his medals, you know? So why couldn’t I want you? At least you were around! At least I knew I could get you, if I kept trying!

“So I kept trying. I had lots of time. I got kicked out of college the end of that semester. My mom’d given me some of the insurance money after Dad died. I spent that whole summer chasing musicians around.” She took a ragged breath. “I saw Lynyrd Skynyrd twice, I saw the Stones at the Garden, Fleetwood Mac, Aerosmith… all those guys. I figured out how to get backstage. And then… that next year, when KISS was back in town—I got you.”

He was starting to remember her now. She hadn’t been any prettier then, their first time together. He remembered opting for her because she seemed to want it most, the way he tried to aim guitar picks at the fans that seemed most desperate for them. But he’d only noticed her at all on the outset because she was very short, the shortest girl in the entire Coop that evening. It had appealed to him, in some weird way—kind of made her endearing. Just a little bit of a chick.

“I picked you up. That was you, wasn’t it? You’re the one I carried out of the Coop.”

She looked a little startled, but she nodded.

“You’re the only one I ever did that to.”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better?”

“I…” Paul hesitated.

He’d been in a good mood that evening, really good. Gene had gotten to the Coop first, as was typical. Then Ace—he knew because he’d passed him in the hallway, face halfway made up and a girl on his arm. He didn’t know about Peter. He’d seen the girl, he’d seen Carol, staring at him with a look that was practically beatific. Like those weird Catholic icons. It should have turned him off, but paired with her height and build, it had just given him an idea. He’d pointed at her; she’d started to walk towards him, and then he picked her up bridal-style, carrying her past one hotel threshold and to another. The other girls in the Coop just about lost it. And Carol, Carol was giggling.

It hadn’t been hard to carry her from the Coop to his hotel room. She probably didn’t weigh much more than ninety pounds. He hadn’t had to sit her down once until putting her on the bed. He remembered being a little pleased with his own theatrics, remembered thinking that it was too bad his taste usually ran to taller girls; otherwise, he might have tried the trick again.

But that was the only thing he remembered from that first evening with her. He couldn’t remember tears or her having trouble getting off or anything; it was just a typical night. He exhaled, trying not to be intimidated by the look in her eyes, the disgust there, the bitterness.

“Carol, I—look, I don’t understand. What was the problem? What didn’t I live up to?”

Carol looked at him. Really looked at him, blue eyes watery.

“Nothing. You were just like all the magazines said.”

“So—”

“You were really good. Well, I thought you were. It’s not like I could compare.”

“You said you—”

“I said I figured out how to get backstage. I didn’t say I slept with all those guys to do it.” Her mouth twisted acridly. “I wasn’t that cheap. I was just waiting on you.”

“Waiting on…” There was a prickling down his spine as it hit him. “Wait, you… were you a virgin?”

Her mouth opened like she was about to speak, or about to sob. She closed it and nodded instead, tears dripping down her cheeks. Paul’s stomach started to churn. He didn’t know how to answer.

“Carol, if I got you pregnant, if you—caught something, I—”

“You didn’t get me pregnant!” Her voice cracked. “You didn’t give me anything! Y-you just slept with me!”

“Then—”

“You took my virginity! Then you got up and took a shower! Asked me to leave like I was a whore! It didn’t mean anything to you! A-all the time I’d spent! All the money I’d spent! Reading about you! Figuring out about you, how t-to get to you—and it didn’t mean a goddamn thing! You only wanted me long enough to get off!” She was crying now. “I-I wanted it to be different! I wanted to mean something to you!”

“Carol, stop—”

“A-and I knew I wouldn’t! I knew I’d be like e-every other girl, but I didn’t want… I-I thought if I could… if I could have you, just once, it’d be enough for me. Just once. But having you made me feel even worse than before!”

He sat there stunned, without a word. One hand shifted awkwardly again, but he didn’t reach for her this time. Instead, he grabbed a tissue from the box next to the mattress, placing it on her thigh. Her fingers clamped around the offering, but she didn’t bring it to her face at first.

“I wasted myself on you. I knew that before you told me to leave. Y-you’d be in some other city the next night, fooling around w-with some other girl. Your breakfast meant more to you than I did.” She rubbed the tissue against her eyes, streaking her eyeliner. “I couldn’t stand it. I threw up as soon as I got out of the hotel.”

Paul’s throat felt dry. He couldn’t say she was wrong, because she wasn’t. He couldn’t say he hadn’t ever thought about it, because he had. He had wondered. He did know he slept with virgins on tour sometimes, just from body language and, sometimes, from the blood. He thought they knew what they were in for, assumed they’d made their choice with just as much awareness as any Butter Queen or Sweet Connie. He didn’t drug girls; he didn’t fuck drunk girls, and he didn’t try to hurt them. But he didn’t give a damn about them, either. He hadn’t in years and years. They came with the tour. Pick the girl like a room service entrée. Never think about the after, or the kind of place she lived in, or the things she wanted—because thinking about that might stir his conscience, might make her matter.

“Then I went home a-and just went to pieces. I even called up my mom.” She sniffled, wiping her nose on a clean edge of the napkin. “I didn’t tell her what happened. But she told me to come back home. I did for awhile, but… it didn’t help. I just kept thinking about you. Going through all those girls l-like we were toilet paper. You and all your stupid bandmates. You and all the other rockstars. Claiming you were looking for the right one. All that bullshit. I wanted to hurt you like you’d hurt me. And I figured out how to do it.”

Paul swallowed thickly.

“It took months to get it all worked out. Marbas is so particular.” Her eyes closed. “I had to make all these offerings just to summon him right. He thought the whole thing was… was funny. That’s why I didn’t really think he’d done it.”

“So you did conjure Marbas.”

She looked a little surprised he knew the reference.

“Yeah. Marbas told me what I needed. How to get to you. I knew you’d come before you walked into CBGB that night.” Her lips tilted up. “You were better that second time, you know. Maybe just ’cause he told me what you liked. You didn’t carry me anywhere. But you offered to let me shower with you, after. I almost changed my mind about cursing you.”

“I wish you had.”

“I don’t.” She wiped her eyes on the tissue again, seeming to recover a little. “It didn’t turn out like I thought it would. You haven’t had it that bad.”

“How the hell can you say that to me? You ruined my life! How can you have the… the nerve to—”

“What’s happened to you?” She twisted the tissue in her hand, crumpling and tearing it. “You’ve got a nice dress. You’re pretty. Y-you’re still getting the VIP floor at Studio 54. You didn’t even have to do anything nasty for it.”

“I’ve got a tour I can’t go on. I’ve got family I can’t see. You can’t—”

“How come you’re even here, Paul?” she interrupted, as if she hadn’t even heard him. “It’s ’cause you just got Gene to take care of you, right? I bet that’s how it’s been this whole time.”

Heat seemed like it flooded his throat. Got him to take care of you. Like… like he was just some dog with a limp, scurrying into the house for comfort and petting. Like he wasn’t capable. Like he had to have Gene there, like he was screwing around, just screwing around with what he knew Gene wanted out of him, just to get ahead, just to get his body back. His guts felt like they were twisting and coiling inside him. He wanted to tell her it wasn’t like that. He wanted to burst into the truth, as lowly as it was, and he couldn’t get the words out. Easier to let her think he was rotten than to own up to—

“Gene—”

“I saw you kissing him.” She said it slowly, still tattering what was left of the tissue. “It’s not just the girls you’d hurt. You’d use anyone to get what you wanted, wouldn’t you? Even him. Y-you really did deserve what I did.”

“Carol, it’s—”

“I won’t take it off.”

Paul stared. His heart felt like it had dropped somewhere down into his twisting guts. He was breathing hard through his nose, mouth twitching. He hadn’t even asked yet. He hadn’t even asked yet, and she’d decided. His gaze drooped, unbidden, to his hands, fingers still long, wrists too thin to even hold Gene’s watch on them, not his hands at all, not really. He didn’t want them. He didn’t want to be like this. Not for forever. He didn’t want to face—

“You’ve got to!”

He hadn’t touched her since that ill-fated reach for her hand earlier. Still trying the time-worn ways to get a girl’s attention, even though it couldn’t possibly work now. Still not really aware that he didn’t have the presence he’d taken for granted his whole life. He turned on the bed, legs splayed out to the side of the mattress, and grabbed her bare shoulders. She bit her lip, drawing back a bit, but didn’t try to push him away.

“You can’t leave me like this! I-I can’t live the rest of my life like this! I don’t want to!”

“I don’t think you’ll have to, Paul.”

“What are you—” Paul stopped, eyes widening, hands shifting down from her shoulders. “Carol, please. I’ll—I’ll pay you, I’ll do anything, all right? I’ll—what do you want? Do you want to fuck me again? Date me? I’ll do that. Whatever you want. I can’t—please, you have to—”

“You think I’d be hot for you when you’re like this?” She snorted. “You caused it. You can fix it.”

“You caused it, damn it! You can fix it!”

She shook her head.

“You weren’t paying attention. It took months to summon Marbas. He won’t want to come back to undo it for me. Not this fast.” She exhaled. “If you want to break the curse, you’ll have to do it yourself.”

“How?”

“It won’t be hard on you, Paul, don’t worry. I’m surprised you didn’t get there already.”

He didn’t hesitate. Even her slight got shoved to the side in his eagerness.

“What do I need to do?”

She shifted, leaning back and resting most of her weight on her arms, against the mattress. Posture that shouldn’t have seemed stiff at all but somehow did.

“Depend on somebody else the way I depended on you. The way all those girls depended on you. Give yourself up just like they did. That’s fair, right?”

Paul sat there stunned. His palms were sweating.

“Give myself up. You mean—”

“Give up your virginity. Get fucked, Paul.” Her mouth was unsteady again, twitching at the corners in her effort not to cry. “You’re still a guy, so maybe you won’t even care. But I hope you do. I hope you feel like I did. I hope you feel like you wasted it on someone that didn’t give a damn. T-that’d be enough for me.”

“That’s what I need to do?”

“That’s it.”

“That’s all?”

Carol took the pieces of tissue, wadding them up and pushing them into her pocket. Then she stood up, biting her lip.

“Yeah. That’s all.”

He started to get up himself. His throat still felt hot, heart and guts all out of alignment, utterly uncertain. Whatever sparks of anger she’d had before were gone already, and she seemed smaller now than ever, like a battered kite, flimsy, forlorn. Someone who’d put all her hopes in something that couldn’t pan out.

He knew who she reminded him of. He’d known the whole time.

“Carol.”

“This is one room you’re not showing me out of,” she said quietly, and walked out the door.

#kiss the band #kiss fanfiction #paul stanley #gene simmons #gene simmons x paul stanley

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