#it was badASS oh my GODDDD BRO
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bc i don't care about spoilers anymore, i want y'all to know that the climax of the south park portion of rm is at ike's winter formal where jersey is stuck wearing what sheila's brother or gerald wore to his prom in the eighties ( its giving downtown abbey, he looks like a founding father, help ) and is still mad as fuck at poor ravenstan, wolfing down punch ( he does not know is spiked, oof )
crimson dawn comes out, ravenstan is FITTED, bro like i put him in this badass emo boy red and black charro outfit because he's a legend with his red combat boots on and his eyeliner going crazy, ( ya i do think kenny and jimmy are in those 2007 scene shirts with the fake tie on them, marj looks like punk rock southern avril lavigne )
asks kyle to take him back, backflips into the splits says "HIT IT!" AND PROCEEDS TO DROP THE SICKEST BADDEST HARDEST POP GOES PUNK ROCK COVER OF STYLE BY TAYLOR SWIFT EVER.
#nina speaks#rm spoilers#PEOPLE DIIIIIIED THAT DAY#by people i mean jerseykyle#sorry to push the kyle swiftie agenda on yall#u have to endure for the HARD punk rock cover of style#IT WAS CRAZY OH MY GOD IT WAS SO GOOD#also gbless stan in his little outfit#it was for sharon bc cartman ruined the one she made him#BY HAND#at their sadies hawkins dance#te amo sonrisa#BUT NO HE WAS TURNING IT OUT#it was badASS oh my GODDDD BRO#sorry i have been sitting on this info for so long#i needed to say something bc ITS SO SATISFYING#kyle did take him back btw#he was glued#the sp(ike)d punch was doing something to his brain#ike and his friends did it btw#they have been trying to parent/brother trap them back together literally this whole time#legends and icons all of those little guys#I LOVE THE WINTER FORMAL IT WAS SO GOOD#THE BACKFLIP SPLITS COMBO U ARE SO COOL RAVEN#anyways…WHEW#i’m done now i am screaming#my magnum opus tbh#i know that first note felt like fkn HEROIN
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u. undyne....<3
#FUCK OFFFFFFF I LOVE WHEN IMPOSING EVIL LADIES OUGH-#cursing all of you for putting undertale shit on my dash in the first fucking place godamn- /lh/nm#ANYWAYS. FUCK BRO I LOVE HER THE FUCKING. FUCKING BADASS FISH OUGHHOUGUOOUG#i-use-my-words-to-express-myself#me when. when women. oh my godddd
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Okay theme songs let's go
Under the cut bc it's gonna be a long one 😭 I left out some of my more casual ones bc I don't have an idea :(
Satine: From Eden by Hozier!!! Like! "Babe/ there's something tragic about you"!!!! Bc both of us are tragic!!!! GAHHH,,,,
47 and Diana: There's so many!! But Shelter by FINNEAS!!!! That song hits so hard but I just. Oh my god. All of Verse Two hits me like a TRAIN!!!!! Fuck.
Movie!47: GAHHH!!! So many songs and half of them are just being absolutely hopelessly devoted. Like some Gomez and Morticia!!!!!! Skyfall by Adele!!! Bc badass couple goes brrr hehe.
Ella and Charming: Pierre by Run Weaver!!!, The vibes of the song are absolutely immaculate for them 🥺
Erik and Charles: Arms Tonite by Mother Mother. Bc we're uh™. Complicated. I think. Also the song is very good!
Arthur Morgan: This Side of Paradise by Coyote Theory!!!! Bc!!! He is lonely,,,I am lonely,,,our fingers dancing when they meet!!!!!! It's so gentle too... ughHHH.
Lucifer: hMM,,,Talk Too Much by COIN!!! He talks,,,so sometimes I just gotta shut him PSJDJSHDH. Also imagining him mumbling the words to that song and he's like an inch away from kissing me drives me insane.
Geralt and Jaskier: FUCK okay okay. You're So Creepy by Ghost Town?? Idk why. It just seems to fit us ;w;
Dana: OUGH MY BELOVED MY SWEET DARLING GIRLFRIEND. Can I Call You Tonight? By Dayglow!!! GAHHH that song is so sweet it hits my little yearning neurons.
Volga: Something Just Like This by The Chainsmokers bc. Bro,,,I just want something just like this,,,somebody I can turn to,,,somebody I can miss,,,
Gordon: WAILS LOUDLY. Die Alone by FINNEAS. It's so perfect for us you don't understand I am so feral its us it's us. The entire song. So good.
Karl: GAH THIS BASTArD <3 What A Heavenly Way To Die by Troye Sivan!!! It's a good song and just. Yes. All of Verse One!!!! There's other songs like Honeypie like JAWNY!!!
Jon and Martin: OKAY OKAY. it's a tie between Foreigner's God by Hozier and You've Got The Life by Florence + The Machine!!!!! GAHHH.
Sully: there's so many songs I could say bc of the ✨complicated love story✨ we are but. But. I Will Follow You into The Dark by Death Cab for Cutie. It's such....🥺🥺🥺😭
Alice: hMMMn,,,Yellow Hearts by Any Saunders bc it's so soft and we're so soft. Oh my god.
The Narrator/Simon: There's so many songs,,,I think Talk To Me by Cavetown!!!! Or It's Alright by Mother Mother. Maybe a mix of those two.
Jason: !!! This fucking man oh my god I want to kiss him. Anyway Creep by Radiohead and I will not expand.
Slenderman: oouughhh. Lay All Your Love On Me by ABBA!!! Esp the one with like the guitar and shit kicking in!!!! Also I Hear a Symphony by Cody Fry :>
Warren: !! Me and My Husband by Mitski!!! Gahhhh <3
Arthur Hastings: YELLS LOUDLY. As The World Caves In by Matt Maltese but specifically the acoustic one!!!!!!!!! Because fuCKKK it's him that I lie with as the atom bomb drops in!!!!!!!!!
Thomas Richardson: I think. Hmm. All of Me by John Legend and Cabo by Ricky Montgomery :0
Harvey: AAA,,,my sweet ghost man...I cannot think of a song other than the one that is our tag 😭. I might say Soulmate Song by Carson James Argenna is the first that comes to mind...second being I Don't Want To Set The World On Fire by Ink Spots!!
Nihilus: OH THIS MAN THIS FUCKING MAN. Oh my GODDDD. Obsessed With You by The Orion Experience!!! Also maybe Daisy Bell by...idk who? goddd,,,,
Luke and Din: They're still kinda new f/os tbh? But. Glad You Came by The Wanted. Something about it makes me think of them,,,,<3!!!
Phone Guy: !!!! gahhh. agaiN so many songs!!! Ugh. Boyfriend by COIN,,,also Absolutely Smitten by dodie,,,,
Miles Upshur: okay this one is gonna sound absolutely ridiculous and obvious,,,but. E.T. by Katy Perry and exclusively without K*yne's part. Also exclusively Clarity covered by Kurt Hugo Schneider.
Mirael and Fawkes: hmMMsnndj,,,,Run by Hozier but like. Also Line Without A Hook by Ricky Montgomery. Wrecking Ball by Mother Mother also makes me think of us!
Izold: yet again thinking of the song that's our theme. Anyway! Hey Lover! by Wabie,,,Walk You Home by Sir Chloe,,,so many songs. *pats Izold's shoulder* this bad boy can fit so many songs into him!!!!!
Alna: AGAIN THE FIRST SONG TO COME TO MIND IS THE ONE THAT'S OUR THEME!!! but. But. Pretend The World Has Ended by She Wants Revenge and Love Story covered by Sarah Coltrane!!! Ahhhh.
#time to tag#✨; star crossed#⚰️; my dove my beautiful one#💜; the a team#🦢; dance with me#🌱; three idiots#🌼; his lawman#💘; devil's dancemate#🗡️; questing together#👔; fbi and anarchist#🔥; gentle fire#🥽; goggled and dangerous#🔨; oh beloved#☕; tea for three#💰; he's my treasure#🍰; whimsical whirlwind#📞; can't pick up the phone#🏒; softly killing#🌲; down in our forest#🗝️; handsome knight#🍞; just two downers#📃; to brighter days#👻; baby you're a haunted house#♠️; favorite wound#💚; love me green#📹; just two journalists#☎️; hello my honey!#🥀; we're wretched but celebrated#🌬️; she keeps me warm#🌿; meet me at our spot
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Riverdale S5 Ep5 Thoughts *Spoilers*
Thoughts under the cut!! :) EXCITED FOR TONIDALE!!!
- more mature Bughead gives off good vibes. Here’s to hoping that if they do have a relapse, it’s just a kiss/makeout/quickie that means nothing and then they realize they don’t feel anything for one another.
- Adult!VA is so sweet aww
- JUGHEAD’S IN THHE BUNKER… bruh he could’ve asked Veronica muah
- Kevin using “Bughead” ew hopefully we never hear it again
- VERONICA DIDN’T TELL HIRAM SHE MARRIED CHAD AS SHE SHOULDN’T HAVE
- Swangs and Toni hating Jughead AS THEY SHOULD. Toothy and Popeye hfjasdhfshk I’M SO PROUD OF THEM FOR STANDING UP TO JUGHEAD MUAHHH
- “THE FIRST RULE OF MY DINER IS NO TABS.” TABITHAAAAAAA!!!!!!!
- Swangs protecting Toni 💞💞💞
- Betty admitting that she and Kevin would sneak peeks at Archie 😏😏 throwback to the first episode
- Still mad they made Reggie work for Hiram. Literal bullshit… makes NO sense.
- Jeronica both having Apple products. SHE JUST CALLED VERONICA MS. LODGE!!!
- SMITHERS ❤️❤️
- WE’VE MISSED MONICA POSH 🔥🔥🔥 LADY LIKE REVOLVERS MMMHM
- THIS IS THE GUN SCENE. ARE WE RIGHT, IS IT ARCHIE?? Oh, it’s Polly. “I haven’t forgotten.” I mean you remembered it because of the random tapes Charles left but sure lol
- Betty is so much more likable now that she’s not with Jughead and an adult muahhhh if I suddenly become a Betty stan MIND YOUR BUSINESS
- Lol Hiram trying to drag Toni down knowing everyone loves her fahjsdkfsaj I have to laugh
- The bad part about being a writer is everyone assumes you can write/write a speech…
- Reggie deserved so much better smh POLLY???
- Jughead looks so good right here ughh
- “I think I’d remember a weird ass name like that.” finally someone says that fjskdhfa
- Again, Reggie deserved better than this devolvement of his character development :(
- BARCHIE WORKING TOGETHER YESSSS. working with the Serpents??!?! OH MY GOD THIS IS SO GOOD THIS IS AL WE EVER WANTED
- You can unincorporate a town……..??
- Not Veronica having to go to Hiram once again… smh but her being the adult in charge makes it better
- HIRAM’S STILL BUTTHURT ABOUT WHAT VERONICA SAID SEVEN YEARS AGO WHAT A LOSER FAJSDHKJFSHFKLAL
- The one time Betty butts in that feels actually good and not annoying yess we love it
- Barchie cleaning up the Andrews’ <3
- Adult Betty is more like they’ve aways wanted her to be
- OH MY GODDDD BARCHIE SHOWER SEX LETS GOOOOOO WE AND THEM HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS FOR FOREVER. It feels so good to actually like this show and get what we deserve 😭😭😭😭 like they’ve been forced to carry out fanservice for FOUR seasons and you can tell everyone is happy for this fresh start. Honestly just erase s1-s503
- The sex scene literally felt so organic muah we’ve rarely ever seen that in this show
- SOMETHING WE’VE BEEN WANTING TO DO SINCE HIGH SCHOOL!!!!!
- barchie friend with benefits muah they can finally head in a direction to where they can be together as they should have been sine the first episode
- Pop 🥺🥺
- WAIT I JUST REALIZED… Veronica used to own/work at Pop’s and now Jughead work’s at Pop’s. My Jeronica ass is taking that and running.
- “HE’S THE ONLY REASON I MADE IT THROUGH.” JUGHEAD PLEASE-
- CHONI! Sucks this is like the only scene of theirs so far but this is Tonidale so they’ll HAVE to get more throughout the season
- Jeronica and Barchie sitting beside each other muahhhhhhhhh this is Barchie and Jeronica’s season
- This show finally being based around Archie
- BETTY IMMEDIATELY BEING IN ON IT. their adult friendships are literally so much better and feel leek their actually friends PLEASE this is all we’ve ever wanted
- SERGENT Archie Andrews. Also Barchie and Jeronica sitting together AGAIN MUAH
- there were definitely more hands for against but whatever
- We got to see Veronica cleaning tables and now we get to see Jughead do it
- Can Jughead ever talk about his OWN tragedy or something lol like bro
- Alice lost her badassery over the years :( II hate it she’s so different
- “Since I made most off the money in our joint accounts.” AHHH BADASS VERONICA
- Barchie owns texting
- JUGHEAD FINALLY ASKING ARCHIE IF HE CAN STAY WITH HIM YESS <3 JARCHIE!!
- Thank God Betty dressed so much better
- So Betty finally genuinely apologizes now that she’s actually in the right literally I—??
- Moree barchie kisses OMG YESSSS
- It’s been so long since this show has been genuinely good… like we all put up with Bughead and Varchie for FOUR seasons of the show only revolving around them and their relationships that never went anywhere and now it’s honestly so intriguing and I’m excited for each episode?? It’s like a new era… imagine not having to be embarrassed about saying we like Riverdale anymore and it being an incredible beloved show like it could have been
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I’LL RESPOND TO YOUR ANSWER LATER BUT 👹👹 I’M GONNA HAVE SO MANY WORDS WITH YOU RIPTIDE IS SO GOOD WTF HOW
no honestly wtf, you described everything so well, are u part of an actual mafia or what. the description of mark’s condition when he was basically fished out actually made me wince like dude OW, that’s gotta hurt. i love how the entire NCT is like a family, it’s so nice to see that the other members cared about the reader too. also like, the description of mark going down deeper into the estate?? the way u wrote his anger and the fact that he sometimes succumbs to his anger and he can “stomach the screams, the blood and the smell of desperation” (i can’t remember the actual quote i was too busy losing my shit) IS SO GOOD OH MY GODDDD.
honestly the thing with mark mourning you on the day you ‘died’ every year reminds me of this one marvel fic i read and it was so good, you wrote his grief so well. even better, you wrote the other members so well!! hyuck and johnny’s back and forth with hyuck’s insistence to not let johnny through and johnny being the only one that could contend with hyuck?? *chef’s kiss* they’re both such amazing friends i love it sm. also the johnten, it was a really cool interaction between the two when ten was tailing the reader,, you can really tell both of them are used to this and again, how ten seemed relieved and even excited at the thought of you being alive. that’s a family right there <33
the reader is so badass dude. i’ll be honest i don’t feel much from fics but the bombing scene genuinely made me shocked, and the way you wrote the reader’s shock and anger was SO GOOOOOD HOLY SHIT i really did feel like i was there, experiencing it all. also dw about the fight scenes, you wrote them pretty well!
i’ll be honest i’m so glad that each episode isn’t super long, i swear i lose interest when each instalment in a series is like 10k words each. i’m so glad urs are a decent length and give just enough to have us wanting more. it’s so good.
but yeah, i can see why you like riptide so much. it was my first time reading a series for someone who’s not my bias but bro!!! mark lee!! the way u write him!!! it’s so good ur such a good writer <3 i can’t wait for the next two episodes it’s SO GOOD. i wanna see how the convo goes down between mark and the reader. — v.
V!!! GOOD MORNING (?) >:)) I see you have entered into the world of Riptide MWAHAHAH I'm very glad that you've enjoyed the ride thus far, and tytysm again for reading it ☹️
now that we have that out of the way: lmao maybe I'm apart of the mafia,,, or maybe I am the mafia; we shall never know ig
I'm so glad the angst was convincing cuz half the time I'm writing, I get so in my feels and then I come back five minutes later to reread and realize that it's all very dramatic 🤡 but then again, I think the only thing I can write is angst at this point, so that's chill lol
DUUUUDE I LOVE WRITING JOHNNY PLS he's such a fun character to write like his personality is so ✨✨✨ and I could not resist throwing in johnten bc we don't get enough johnten nowadays 😔😔 you'll see next chapter that I lich rally cannot get enough of this man (me being down bad for every nct member part 24829)
(oof we do not talk about those fight scenes akdnwlsj they're so embarrassing)
omg is this me wrecking ur bias list again mayhaps 👀👀 lol jkjk but I feel like Mark is just too soft boi for me to write a smexy thing for him like COUGH NOMIN COUGH aNywAys—
I've always wondered how other writers are able to write long oneshots w/o the urge to break them into separate installments? but ig it's just preference lol I prefer series with mid-length chapters tbh cuz I have the attention span of a goldfish 😃 lots of respect to every writer who writes oneshots that r longer than 5k 🤧 that's commitment and talent
#sungbeam strikes again#v <3#welcome backkkk#in our riptide feels#gonna go make sure the next chapter is good to post lmfao
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@roguepythia you asked for it ;)
PREPARE FOR THE LONGEST COMMENT I HAVE EVER WRITTEN FOR A SHOW
How is gotham the only show I have ever seen that acknowledges mothers can be abusive too lol UHHHHM WTF what the fuck is going on with Pyg's face Seriously, every single villain on this show is trying to out-extra each other. Some wear glittery suits, others get hair so high it doesn't fit into the frame anymore, and some dramatically murder some random dude to the tune of ave maria. And you know what?? It doesn't even shock me anymore. I love this show. Harper is alive!! :DD And her name sounds so much like Harvey's holy shit MY WIFE IS WEARING HER RED COAT AGAIN Ajsjdkcksjah I love how she's acting around everyone she's manipulating??? Pretending to be in love with Jim (I will continue to see it like that no matter what happens) to prevent him from parting from her is such a badass move I love her so much LEEEEEEE!!!! She's running the Narrows like a boss and Grundy and Ed are her sidekicks!!! I sorta expected her to be Ed's but it works so much better this way?? Uhmmmm Ed made a smart suggestion!! That boy isn't dumb and we all know it. Oh also, letting her kill the guy is exactly what Oswald would probably have done which means!!.... I'm not sure what it means exactly but it's definitely good for my ship Lee is so caring and nice and badass and I want to cry ;-; first she settles a dispute that would have ended in death without her and a second later she asks about a kids health. I just love her so much, being away from Jim is helping her so much Aand can we please talk about how Ed and Oswald literally changed hairstyles?? Ed does it over his forehead for some reason and Oswald slicks it back/up. Bitch wtf that is some soulmate level shit right there Supportive Ed giving Lee really smart advice about ruling is giving me feels about the Lee/Ed brotp and early season 3 as well. Fuck me up Look at Lee being a better person than Jimmyboy ever was! Contrary to him, she's not a hypocrite ❤️ Oswald looks so sad :( He knows Sofia has been tricking him and even has proof, but he still seems to hope the one friend he still has isn't betraying him (I'm not counting Martin because he's clearly his son guys) Yoooooo this "perfect explanation against suspicion" is exactly what happened with Maroni and Oswald in season 1. With the difference that Oswald actually cares about Sofia while Maroni only liked Oswald for the profits he brought him Sofia is beautiful and adorable and I wish I had a girlfriend like her, pretty and adorable instead of no girlfriend at all She keeps lying and Oswald looks so damn heartbroken :( This is what happens when you take every single person someone cares about away, they become terrified of betrayal He cared about her so much, let her in on his business etc and it was all fake. His heart is probably actually breaking right now (in a platonic way) And in the middle of this actually heartbreaking scene that has me on the verge of tears (partially because I'm super gay for Sofia, partially because I feel so bad for Oswald), Zsasz makes me laugh by reciting a fucking meme. This fucking show. It hurts so much to see Oswald trying to hold back his tears and smile gleefully while it's obvious his whole world just shattered. AND YET it gets even more painful once Sofia admits she lied. He doesn't even have the energy anymore to pretend to be happy Oh my fucking god Zsasz's face at "foot rub" Sofia is so done and I love her Yo what the shit the Dentist is the creepiest fucking character on the show so far If there is one thing Gotham truly adapted from the comics, it's the idea of villains constantly making puns about their theme I just love how the three characters Jim calls first class villains are Jerome, Fish and Oswald. Mention Fish more often please!!!! What do all the villains of the show have in common? Correct! They all want to be remembered in one way or another That was the funniest southern accent I've ever heard. It's so southern, even me, a german teenager who has never been to america, realises it's southern Lee and Ed, the two Badass Bros, on their way to fuck her rival up. Hell Yeah. I had to play that scene three times because I never understood what the guy said until I finally turned on subtitles and I could have sworn he said husband instead of has-been. Ed would make a great husband for a certain flightless bird I can promise you that Ed is being super smart?? Oh godddd if I wasn't gay for Sofia before, when she acted all sweet and adorable, I am definitely HELLA gay for this badass, openly manipulative, top of the game Sofia. Holy FUCK SHE FUCKING MEMORISED EVERY SINGLE DETAIL ABOUT OSWALD AND HIS EMPLOYEES SHE'S SMART AS FUCK Sofia making fun of the guy who's about to torture her, laughing into his face and threatening his family while somehow still remaining adorable and sweet as hell is my sexuality You know what really gets me about this scene?? The way she coldly threatens a whole family, isn't even a bit scared of a horror-dentist but can't watch some random dude getting his brain drilled. She's so badass and incredible and yet she still has compassion YESSSSSSS THE CRIME GIRLS ALL TEAMED UP well they're enemies but they share a scene!! Selina is wearing leather gloves just like Michelle Pfeiffer did oh my fucking godddd this is amazing I'm so fucking gay for mastermind!Sofia MARTIN IS SITTING ON OSWALD'S THRONE AND OSWALD WANTS HIM TO INHERIT HIS CLUB WHICH MEANS OSWALD IS ALREADY PLANNING TO RAISE HIM AS HIS OWN SON AND BE A DAD WHICH HE ALREADY IS AAAAAAAAAAAH Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck I mean we all realised there was something fishy about the scene where Sofia catches Martin spying and suddenly the scene cuts off but I kinda hoped it was just weirdly shot BUT HEY at least it wasn't his decision!!! I feel so terrible for Martin :( He looks terrified to tell Oswald the truth, probably felt guilty as hell lying to him in the first place but ignored it to prove himself to Oswald, and he knows how angry Oswald can get. And he STILL tells him!! That's some father-son trust right there guys I love how Oswald collects himself before answering the phone. Martin really is helping him with his temper huh I don't know if I ever said it before, but I really love the new Barbara?? Probably my favourite version of the character yet. Calm, calculating, but still emotional and crazy. Love her Martin looks so fucking scared :(( Protect him please MORE SCENES FOR FOXY PLEASE Selina is literally the youngest in the room but she's the only one that notices they're about to die. Really makes you think And Sofia keeps playing Jim and Oswald against each other! She knows she'll probably die if she doesn't do something fast, so she pushes her plan along and asks Jim to finally take Oswald down. Even though this is about her victory, she makes it look like it's what Jim wants too (which it kind of is?) I'm almost amazed at how Jim is finally thinking with his brain instead of his dick or ego. Almost because that should be the logical thing to do I can't watch Martin cry :( He feels so terrible for Sofia using him, which isn't even his fault, and he apologises and cries and I just want to protect him forever :( I get why Oswald is pissed but you can't just threaten a kid with basically kicking him out of the family But still, I love that even when Oswald is pissed at Martin he is patient enough to let him finish writing his answer without interrupting. that's better parenting than most parents do when they're pissed at their kids AND even though Oswald calls Martin a "little spy" he still cares enough to keep him away from the actual violence. Oswald?? More like Dadwald. Sassy Oswald is still the best. Lol as if he needed to be there to have someone killed The way Jim's and Sofia's scene was cut off it seemed like he considers her plan and will probably follow it but??? I'm pleasantly surprised?? I love how done Oswald is with Jim when Zsasz leaves I mean same This!!! Is the only kind of Gobblepot I am happy to accept. They're still enemies and they threaten each other etc but they have a common enemy and they work together to defeat them. This is some good shit right there This is also the first time this season I actually like Jim. He should threaten people like that more often. Ed and Lee fucking turn to each other in the exact same second this is the best friendship on this show Ed is sassy and witty and Lee is just like "!! this is my best friend and we're sassing this dude together" I love their friendship so much Remember how I said how gay I am for Sofia?? Add Lee too please she's so amazing and have you seen how she looks in this episode?? This whole season?? fuck i'm so gay No matter how genuine Sofia looks just before she kisses Jim, I will keep in mind that she looked just as genuine in her friendship with Oswald and no matter what happens, I will keep holding on to my hope that she does not love him. She's too good for him anyways More female-female scenes!! Oh god I hope this doesn't mean Harper will die I don't want that OH FUCK MARTIN BETTER BE OKAY The scene with the sirens and Martin in the car perfectly show their most important character traits this season?? Selina is the one that observers and notices, Tabitha is the brute that doesn't really bothers with people unless she likes them and Barbara, even though she's calmer now, is still the emotional one. Did I meantion how much I love their team-up?? For one terrible second I thought Zsasz had been working for Sofia the whole time and came to rescue her. I'm SO glad I was wrong Oh Jimmy you should have known Sofia won't let herself be "put on a train" just like that. I'm so damn happy Zsasz didn't kill Harper I cannot believe Oswald was willing to let Sofia live even though she betrayed him etc but as soon as Martin is in danger, he flips and is prepared for a full on war against her Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck Oswald is so worried for Martin :( I am dying and I hope Martin isn't OH FUCK SAVAGE that was the sickest burn holy shit Aaaand I also just remembered how sweet Gertrud and Elijah were and I miss them so much OSWALD GIVES UP HIS POWER FOR THE THIRD TIME NOW FOR SOMEONE HE LOVES AAAAAH Dadwald ;-; he loves Martin so much and Martin knows it and I just want to cry Let himself say these things to Ed next please The melody is the same one that played when Ed threw away the pills in 3x15. Oswald better not do what I fear he'll do BITCH WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK MARTIN BETTER NOT BE DEAD OR I'LL LITERALLY SUE Eddie, honey, sweetie pie, you have always been at your best mental heights when you were a sidekick. Sorry to tell you buddy but you are literally the best at being a sidekick, even though you are an amazing villain when you're alone as well Ed's brain damage is psychological!!! It's psychosomatic!!!! It's just him not being able to cope with losing against Oswald!!!!!!! Boiiii this implies some amazing things for the future I KNEW Ed's suggestions were smart!!! And Lee knows it too!!! The fact that it's more important to Ed that Lee lied than the fact that he's still brilliant is so telling tbh. It perfectly mirrors the way he reacted when Isabella got killed: He didn't really care about her death in and of itself, but the fact that Oswald lied to him for weeks. Here it's the exact same thing, just with less death and suffering. Even Lee's response mirrors Oswald's motivation! She was afraid of him becoming the Riddler again, aka leaving her, and Oswald was afraid of Ed choosing Isabella, aka leaving him!! It probably won't happen, but I really hope this will lead to Ed reflecting on what really broke him and Oswald apart. This may be the first time in all four seasons someone tells Ed they like him the way he is now. Kristen wanted him to be more “manly” first and less murdery later. Oswald wanted him to be who he was with the added factor of being in love with him (which he was, come on) and maybe more murdery. Lee is the first person that likes Ed the way he is without wanting to change him in any way and even says so. This is what true friendship looks like guys. SHE CALLS HIM HER FRIEND AND HE LOOKS LIKE HE'S ABOUT TO CRY How long has it been since Ed had any friends?? A whole season for sure, right? Before Oswald, there was no one at all who was an actual friend for him. And now Lee comes along, supports him and lets him do what he does best and their friendship is so pure I want to cry. The "you didn't get told no a lot as a kid" thing from Barbara kinda fucks me up a bit tbh. Firstly, because Sofia probably got told no too much, since approval is literally the reason she does all this. Secondly, because I remember how terrible Barbara's parents were and how they called her a pig and all that. The both got told no way too often which is why theyre doing what theyre doing now This is the first time I could sorta analyse Barbara nice MARTIN IS ALIVE!!!! I'm so fucking glad holy shit HOLY FUCK WAIT A SECOND does this mean The Penguin's reputation as a gross soulless bastard comes from everyone thinking he murdered his own adopted kid??? BOIIII that means the thing everyone knows him for is actually fake and what really went down is Oswald saving the kid's life and giving up his dream of raising him just to protect him!! LOVE IS ABOUT SACRIFICE SUCKERS OSWALD CALLS MARTIN "MY BOY" OH MY GODDDDDDDD HE MIGHT AS WELL SIGN THE ADOPTION PAPERS NOW Oswald is about to cry and Martin is already crying and neither of them wants to be parted but Oswald cares too much about Martin to risk his death like he did with his mother by keeping him at his side. This shit is beautiful and I'm sobbing what the fuck FINALLY OSWALD GETS THE HUG HE DESERVES THEY BOTH LOOK LIKE THEY'RE LOSING WHAT THEY LOVE MOST IN THE WORLD So let me get this ‘straight’: Oswald is willing to give up the life he dreams of to make sure Martin is safe? He's willing to let someone he loves go to protect them?? BOY Oswald has grown so much over the course of this whole show HOWS THAT FOR "and you won't change" ED???? All the pieces for a renewed friendship between them are there! Ed is less obsessive, has found friends who can keep him from doing something rash like, I don't know, murdering his best and only friend and understood why Lee lied the same way Oswald did. Oswald learned to love even more selflessly than he did in 3x14 when he was already willing to sacrifice his life for Ed's by sending Martin away, thus proving Ed's theory about Oswald never being able to love that way wrong once and for all. NOW GET THEM TOGETHER INTO THE SAME SPOT PLEASE AND MAKE THEM TALK THEIR SHIT OUT My favourite plottwist is "we're raising the ratings with straightbaiting so we won't get cancelled and say someone will come into Oswald's life and change his view on love just before introducing Sofia, but actually Oswald will just adopt an adorable mute kid" Okay but where are my 20k word fanfics about Martin coming back to Gotham as an adult/teen to be a family again Zsasz is sceptical of sending Martin away but as soon as Oswald calls him is top man he agrees lol There was a guy called Laszlo/Lazlo at the beginning of the first season btw I'd literally die if Pyg was him You idiot, have you never seen Megamind???? If you don't see someone when you look into a cell, you don't open it and check wtf that's literally the easiest way to escape guys OH FUCK OH FUCK OH FUCK ED'S HALLUCINATIONS OF HIS DARK SELF ARE BACK!!! I wonder if Lee accidentally triggered them by saying Ed is who he was before he went crazy fuck You know you spend too much time in school when you're too distracted by the missing comma in Pyg's blood message to find it scary
TL;DR: Sofia is hot as fuck Lee is hot as fuck and the best friend ever Lee and Ed are brotp forever and I'm so damn glad he finally found friends after all the shit he went through Oswald is heartbroken over losing Sofia's friendship and then over losing his son and so am I This season's women are sooo damn badass please let me marry them all Martin HAS TO come back!!!
#theere you go#i wrote this while i was watching the episode yesterday#so a lot of this is also just me freaking out over#...#certain parts#gotham meta#kinda
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Blindspot 2x19 recap
(Aka the Scavenger hunt)
(Aka both Zapata and Shepherd getting arrested and Reade coming back and Patterson being adorable and Jeller ALMOST-KISSING AAAAAHHHHHHHH)
Well, here it is at last. This recap should have been posted a week ago, after already having been delayed by all the fic-writing, but just as it was aaaalmost done, my computer crashed and lost the whole damn thing. So here’s take 2 haha, and I’ll try to get my 2x20 recap up tomorrow, if I’m lucky...
(Warning: extreme flailing ahead)
Well, here’s to the amount of deja vu I’m about to experience lol. And just a note-- I’m gonna speed through the Shepherd scenes bc frankly I don’t care about them in the slightest. And so speaking of which, we're back in Bangkok and Shepherd’s using all the ominous language about how the guy should avoid the western world and blah blah she totally thinks she's so badass, yet she has no idea that the western world-- or specifically, the Weller & Patterson bro-sis combo, is about to Strike Back (;P). And so while she's acting tough and threatening the sellers of the toxic stuff, these two precious little catburglars are stealing all of her ill-gotten money. I love Patterson being about to go into a complex explanation of how, and Weller being all "Don't explain. Just type." haha. Aw, my little partners in crime. And then Patterson succeeds in freezing the account, causing all hell to break loose for Shepherd, bullets flying, her entire little posse getting shot down and she herself barely escaping with her life (though damn, for a middle-aged lady she sure still got some moves)-- and back in the lab, Weller and Patterson are just sitting there like.... 'well that was anticlimactic' hahahaha. Oh, if only you knew how much you had just ruined Shepherd's day lol. You would be as delighted as I am. Also damn she just went all Terminator on this guy, only to get nabbed by the cops which is SO satisfying even though we know she'll get free soon enough. But still, anything that pisses Shepherd off is just fine by me lol
Looollll it's the Right Boob Snake! I assume you guys heard the story from last year's SDCC panel, but in case you didn’t, the gist of it was that this tattoo is Rob's favourite because each tattoo is kept in a separately labelled storage container thing and this one is labelled with 'Right boob snake'. Also I love that we have literally never seen the team use a CG graphic of the tattoos until now, when it's one in a 'private area', which is so cute omg. I wonder if Weller is disappointed or relieved? Knowing what a gentleman he is, probably relieved lol. But anyway, they already know that the snake is the calling-card of a hacker guy, but they could never find him until just now, when he was picked up on facial recognition for the first time. Is it just me or does he kind of look like a less-attractive Henry Cavill? But anyhow they assume that he's going to hack into some mainframe or something so they rush to Grand Central to detain him. And awww Jane and Tasha both get their own little mini-teams to lead. Man, these guys are totally FBI elite, aren’t they? God all the other agents must think they are just so cool. I bet there's heaps of office gossip about them and people pick their favourite team member like fans do with the Avengers (which should clearly be Clint and Natasha, duhh) or Power Rangers or whatever. I bet all the Reade fans have been bummed lately. But anyhow, they've spotted their target at the station-- he just picked up a dead drop. Jane follows him, but he's clearly expecting trouble bc he notices her, then makes a run for it-- only to be grabbed by another guy. And for a sec I thought it was one of Jane's lackeys that she'd perfectly positioned-- but then that guy slits the hacker's throat and steals the package. Daaaamn. Also omg I find it hilarious that there's like instant screaming and running from the bystanders the moment it happens-- like c’mon, writers. These are New Yorkers. New Yorkers have got shit to do and places to be and they keep their eyes DOWN. They'd have to be standing right beside this guy and get their coffee spilled on themselves in the struggle to even notice at all. I do appreciate that Jane goes straight to the hacker to administer first aid rather than running after the attacker, leaving that to Zapata. Who does a damn good job of it, nearly catching the guy before he's shot by another dude who subsequently takes the package. Like damn, what is in this thing?? Zapata runs straight past the guy on the floor, not even checking to see if he's still alive, too busy giving chase to dude #3. Too bad, son. Weller, however, catches the guy first and kicks his ass very thoroughly, which we all know I am a huge supporter of. And inside the package is.... a Rubiks cube?? I wonder if it opens up when you solve it???
Lol Weller's bummed about going through all that for a Rubiks cube, grumping about it being a dumb toy-- and Patterson's all 'excuse u these are very cool adult things that totally normal and cool adults are into okay' and ughhh the little grin on Zapata's face just gives me life. Almost as much as the fact that when Patterson says the cube is related to Leakhub, Zapata immediately explains what it is to Jane, instantly knowing that she's in the dark about it and catches her up so she doesn't have to ask. Ughhhh Zapata is such an amazing and considerate friend and she just always knows what people need and I'm so glad that she and Jane are back to being buds again because they are the besssssttt. Then Patterson shows them the mannequin-challenge video that she found (idk exactly how, using her usual Patterson awesomeness I guess) that had the message from the Leakhub founders in it, hidden on the license plates. Damn. Sometimes I remember that this is a TV show and that it's written by actual real people and I think about it and I'm just like goddamn these people are clever. But anyhow. I love that the mannequin challenge actually came up at all (even though by this point in time, even in the show-universe, it would be a long-dead meme) just because the Blindspot cast and crew did a challenge of their own and this all feels very meta rn haha. I love Patterson approving of the classy iambic pentameter in the coded message too haha. And so they realise that the Leakhub founders are basically having a going out of business giveaway, handing over their cache of Super Secret Files to whoever completes their challenge. And on that list of documents is... dun dun dun... the Truman Protocol, which as we've heard is basically the basis of Phase 2. So if they find this document, they might be able to stop Shepherd. And, you know, there's also the fact that if any one of these documents gets into the wrong hands, it could have devastating consequences etc etc
Aaaand Shepherd is in some super tiny little jail thing, and will be taken to the consulate when it opens in ten hours. Yeaaaaahhhhh she'll be long gone by then. I do appreciate the guard guy verbally putting her in her place though. Too bad she'll probably kill him soon.
Lol Patterson has solved the Rubiks cube-- though not in the traditional way, as Weller points out, eyeing the randomly-coloured sides. She snarks that she could have solved it in 30 seconds (20 when she was in tournament shape appearently, and omg I adore her so much) but explains that the arrangement of the little colored squares per side IS the code, with each pair of them representing numbers or letters. Zapata seems to get it, bc that girl is honestly such a secret little nerd, but I personally would be in the 'smile and nod' camp with Jane and Weller rn lol. Basically it translates to a challenge where they have to hack one of a bunch of different documents. They realise, too, that there were other Rubiks cubes out there, and other people are also playing this game, meaning it's like a large-scale scavenger hunt. The team picks one that involves a big pharmaceutical company that is reported to have products that cause cancer, meaning they can complete the challenge in a bit of a Robin Hood way rather than causing more problems. Weller's totally ready to just ditch Patterson to get all hacky with it, but she drags him back, telling him that doing it by remote access would take her all day, and then before he even speaks she says in a super deep voice "we don't have that kind of time, Patterson" and then continues laying out her plan and oh my godddddd Patterson mocking her big bro is everything I have ever wanted in this world and more. I think I literally shrieked. Weller gives her this adorable 'excuse me??' look and ugh Jane is so completely failing at hiding her smile and omg I love this stupid team and their stupid family dynamic ughhhhhhh
Omg. Patterson's plan literally involves Jane and Weller going for a relaxing couple's stroll down the CEO guy's street, and I literally cannot even explain how delighted I am rn because Jane is literally loving it?? She's smiling like a kid, just so happy to be here with him, getting to do something relaxed and easy and just the two of them-- like literally she could reach out just a tiny bit and they'd be holding hands, walking down the street like any other lovestruck couple without a care in the world. And of course Weller notices her smile, and he makes a joke about them not getting shot at for once (dude, please at least knock on wood after saying something like that, geez), and ughhhhhh I love her little laugh and her bright smile as she looks up at him and then the way she giggles as a couple of kids race past them and omg she's literally almost giddy just to be out doing something normal with the man she loves and I am SO EMOTIONAL about it. And then sighhhh, the moment is over and the smile fades and she takes a deep breath and asks him about hearing from Nas, and how he feels about her leaving, given the whole thing with Allie having left as well, and oh godddd now I'm emotional in a much less pleasant way because she knowwwwwwwss. Jane knows/knew about him and Nas-- like she might even think that they were still together right up until Nas left-- and she puts her own feelings aside to make sure he's okay and aaaaarghhhhhhhhh this is the woooooorst. She has literally probably known since that damn baby shower in 2x08 and ugh I can't even imagine how it must have hurt her to see them both at work every day and know that they probably woke up together that morning or would be going home to each other that night and ugh noooo my baby. She just cares about him so much and suffers through it silently and ugh it hurts me. And Weller's pretty much all 'huh? Nas who?' bc lbr that was only ever just a stupid fling for him (emphasis on the stupid) and his heart has always been 100% Jane's but he probably thinks she's just asking to make sure he doesn't compromise the mission somehow by being distracted over Nas and there's almost a dry little chuckle in his voice as he tells her he's fine and ughhhh these two literally just need to have a clear conversation bc this is driving me CRAZY. Idiots. But anyhow, they've just found the guy's car (fortunate timing there) and so they stroll over, with Weller standing guard over Jane while she casually slashes though one of the car's tires like it's warm butter (bc she's a superhuman, obviously-- do you have any idea how hard it is to slash through a tire?? Hard!) but anyway tbh I don't know if anything could really capture my aesthetic better than this moment lol? And anyhow onto the next step-- the guy comes out and sees his slashed tire, only for a cab to conveniently pull up right beside him-- with Weller at the wheel haha. Ugh I love Patterson's customer service voice as she calls to tell the guy he's being hacked, almost as much as I love the little grin she and Zapata exchange as she does it. And then he tells her to piss off with her little scam, then calls the ‘real’ IT department-- only to be answered by Zapata, and omgggg if I loved Patterson's customer service voice I am DYING over Zapata's. Also what an asshole, he just hung up on Zapata mid-sentence?? So glad their little camera then watches him put in his password so they can steal all his stuff and expose him. But ughh I can't believe that Weller's voice has somehow managed to get even deeper and more gravelly than usual? I hope Jane can hear Cabbie!Weller over the comms rn bc I really want her to be able to experience this too haha. Honestly though do the writers of this ep have some kind of role-playing fantasy, or?? Because it's sure as hell feeling like it... not that I’m complaining
Aaaahhh Reade just showed up in the bullpen. Weller takes him straight to his office and I love the fact that while Reade immediately sits, Weller is standing for just a moment longer, meaning that when Reade apologises he's looking up at Weller. It's very 'penitent son' or something, idk. And Weller is so calm and steady, and ugh he could totally rip Read a new one for what he did but instead he's so supportive and forgiving and allows Reade to take the time off without the upper management ever having to hear what he did and ugh tbh I feel like season 1 Weller wouldn't have been this gentle?He would have been much more shouty. I think his experiences with trauma and betrayal recently have made him even more understanding and forgiving and despite what Reade said before, they ARE family. And Weller looks out for his own. And then ughhh Reade and Zapata... but wait he thanks her for 'sitting through that' and she tells him she's sorry... and oh no. Ohhhh noooooo. He really was abused. Oh god. I am so horrified and sad that he had to watch that and sort of re-live it. Ugh Reade my baby I know I've been grumpy at your behaviour lately but I am so sorry and I love you and I hate to see you hurting. Also their hug is so sweet ugh and wow she really is tiiiiiny lol
Awww Weller walks into the Bullpen and I love that his three ladies are all hanging out together at the same desk?? Like Patterson could be down in her lab with her lackeys and Jane and Zapata could have been off doing their own thing but instead they're all sticking together bc they're besties and ughhhhh I am so happy. Also have I mentioned how much I love this ‘Charlie's Angels’ kinda situation they've got going on rn?? Reade's away and there's no more Nas (#sosad), so it's just Weller and his angels and ugh I am so into it. Literally can we have a spin-off movie about this? Like Patterson is their computer whiz and Zapata is the demolitions/weaponry expert and Jane is their combat expert and they fight crime under the direction of their doting leader Weller and ugh just give it to me now. But anyhow the Leakhub peeps have received the files that they hacked from the asshole drug company guy (and which Patterson cleverly sent through fancy means so they'll never know it came from the FBI), and a new message comes, telling them to wear red, go to a particular place, and bring someone they trust. And uggghhhh just let me die,��bc Weller doesn't even hesitate; he just immediately picks Jane to go with him. Their responses kill me-- Jane's head snaps around and she just stares at him; Zapata's all like 'of course you would' haha; whereas Patterson's all disbelieving and insists that she should be the one to go bc what if there are more puzzles??? This is literally her forte. Ooh and Zapata looks at him then like 'let's see you argue this one buddy' lol. And then Weller says he's great at puzzles and Patterson legit laughs before quickly putting on a serious face when he stares at her (yep, he may be your big bro but he's kinda still your boss, honey) and she says "Yes, in your own way" and ughhh Zapata is LOVING this and I loooove the fact that she looks to Jane (who is determinedly staring at the ground, trying so hard not to laugh) because they're best buds again and they're all sharing this joke at Weller's expense ughhhh. Oh man, I almost feel sorry for my lil boy. So outnumbered. So out of his depth. But because they love him, they let him pretend that he really is calling the shots, and Patterson relents (sidenote: what are those earring she's wearing? Like an inverted triangle underneath another upright triangle? Isn't there some culture where upside down triangle means ‘woman’ and upward pointing triangle means ‘man’? So this combination would mean... sex? Idk maybe I just made that up, but anyway enough about the sex earrings) and helps Jane pick out her red outfit. Maaannn I wish we had gotten to see the conversation she and Jane had in the locker-room (or lbr, the one she, Jane and Zapata had, all in there together giggling at Weller’s expense haha).
Oooh karma has caught up with Weller quickly-- he's right, he does look ridiculous. But I still dig it?? And it seems Jane does too haha. Ugh I loooove seeing her smile and laugh so much??? She's actually really enjoying this case and I think that has less to do with the relative lack of danger and more to do with the amount of one-on-one time with Weller ugh. Oh and now suddenly they're swept up in a sea of red, meaning Patterson and Zapata lose them. Ooops. So they end up at some big old industrial building, which Weller says used to be a sanatorium for TB patients back in the early 1900s. Well look at you, lil history buff! I am now headcanoning that Weller knows heaps of NYC history bc it was an interest he developed when he was younger (maybe young Weller couldn't face the future without Taylor so he spent all his time focused on the past ugh) and ugh now I want him to take Jane out on a walking date where he just tells her history of the places they see while they hold hands and eat icecream or something ugh. I can dream, right?? But anyhow the door is their first challenge-- a keypad with a note about the simplest answer being the right one, and a math riddle, and they just look at each other like 'man it would be great to have Patterson right now' lol. And Jane's like 'ugh maths is gross why don't we just guess' but Weller stops her and just reaches for the door handle and pulls the door open. The simplest answer was that the door was never locked in the first place. Looks like it's lucky Weller did go along, bc I feel like Patterson might have solved the equation without necessarily thinking of any other alternatives. Score one for Weller. Tbh I feel like I would have done the same as Weller, bc I would have just been like 'nope too much maths can I just yank it open by force instead' lol. Though man the riddle does give me some serious flashbacks to the IQ test I had to do in order to get into med school. The first third of the test was all stuff like that, and those logic puzzles like where you have to get all the animals across the river in a boat but it could only hold two at a time and some of the animals would eat each other if left alone etc. I actually quite liked that section but the middle third was more my jam-- we just read different paragraphs of text about people interacting with each other and had to determine why they did what they did/said certain things/how they were feeling etc. That part was awesome. The third part was literally looking at patterns and picking which weird shape should come next in the sequence and I really wasn't a fan of that one at all haha. But aaaaanyhow. I wonder what would have happened if they'd put an answer into the keypad? Like would it have just locked them out, or blown up in their faces?? But omg I love Weller's 'told you I was great at puzzles' and the way Jane just rolls her eyes at him omg these two are so marrieeeeddddddd
Wow okay so they pretty much just stepped into the human version of a bowl of skittles-- there's colourfully dressed couples everywhere, and looollll Jane makes a joke about being glad not to be on the turquoise team and ughhh my baby is such a goddamn cutie pie omg. The green team gives them shady looks, and Jane wonders if everyone here is a hacker-- but Weller says some would be mercenaries or bodyguards or spies. Great. Lol then suddenly the lights go down and epic music starts and a spotlight appears on a hooded figure and for half a second I almost expect it to be Rich (even though I know he's back in prison and has an entirely different body shape) bc this is totally his kind of style haha. But then the hooded figure reveals themselves to be... Kaylee?? Erm, I mean some lady hacker, meaning ooooh the Hacker Bros are actually sisters. Or were, since the other one was apparently killed in a boat crash. Um, okay. This is all a little weird. God she really does remind me of Rich though. I wonder if they've met? I bet they're friends. Or exes haha. And then crap she says that there's a cop in the room and pulls out a gun and dammit Jane your poker face is usually better than this, get yourself under control woman! But then she does sound super badass and in-control when the Hacker Chick asks her who she thinks the cop is, so phew. Aaaand oops, now the white team is dead. Well, a little less competition, at least?
Oh I forgot about Shepherd. She tries to connect with the guard about living with tyrants, but little does he know that SHE is the tyrant she's talking about. Ugh, I wish he had a tranq gun or something to knock her out with
Oh Readey. My baby is at the shooting range having all kinds of nasty flashbacks as he shoots, and okay either all his shots will have gone wild and missed entirely, or they'll all be right on top of one another in the silhouette-man's heart. Aaand it's the latter. Oh my poor traumatised son. You need more Zapata hugs ugh
Hacker chick is taking them all to individual rooms for the next challenge, and I love that when she holds up the hard drive of files, Jane looks back at Weller like 'are you sure we can't just attack her now and steal it? We could take on all these people' lol. But instead they head for their room (poor orange team just got dissed by the Hacker chick. That's what you get for wearing such a terrible colour lol) and omg I KNOW WHAT THIS IS. I loooove escape rooms, though I've never yet done one. One just opened in my town though so I'm gonna try to drag some friends along. Oh but before the key-finding can begin, there's a polygraph challenge-- "prove you can trust each other and you'll fin d your fates will be forever intertwined" yaaaassss I like the sound of this. It's true though, isn't it? If they reveal some of the things they've ben hiding from each other and then come through this whole ordeal knowing that they trust each other, they'll be one step closer to finally getting back on the right path, the one they’re meant to be on, the one that leads to marriage and babies and growing old together ughhhhh. And oooh Weller seems a little nerv ous about the polygraph-- if it asks him his feelings for Jane, he's screwed. He'll be even more at her mercy than he already is. Not to mention that he probably still thinks she doesn't feel the same and ughhh my boy is just not ready to be stripped of the last of his walls. Not like this. Whereas Jane is all 'let's do this' because she knows that if she needs to, she can beat the machine. Though I feel like that wouldn't be hard in this instance anyway bc it's literally missing half of the measurement devices that it should have, and somehow apparently can have answers of more than just yes or no? Mmmmkay, sure. But ugh the look they exchange when the chick is on the screen talking about them trusting each other. Both of them are like 'despite everything I trust you but I have no idea if you feel the same' and ughhhh I am so READY for this. And then lol the chick trolls Weller when he tries to talk to the recording. I love the humour in this show haha. But aaaahhh the first question is about meeting each other and their first impression, and I'm interested to know how this would work for those teams that are hacker + bodyguard/mercenary? Like 'we met this morning and he seemed like he would be really good at killing people so I thought that was good'?? Or maybe that’s the point, it's like an instant method of disqualifiying some teams, in that the questions are designed to show that they have a strong bond, a connection and trust equal to that which she had with her sister, so any pairs of strangers would automatically have to fail. After all, the rule specifically said 'bring someone you trust', meaning those teams broke that rule. Which means that Jane and Weller are automatically going to be one of the few teams that have a chance of winning. Excellent. But omggggggg the way Weller looks up at her sharply when she said she was terrified when she met him?? Ugh and he looks at the computer like 'wait no that can’t be right' and it comes up True and she looks at him all 'I did good?' and he's still processing that one because ugh of course she was scared-- she had no idea who she was or why this was happening and was locked in a room completely at the mercy of the people holding her-- but he would hate the thought of her being scared of HIM. But tbh I totally believe that the moment she first met him, her terror went from overwhelming to just a low background hum, because she just instantly recognised that he was Good and would try to help her and protect her. But wait hold on I want to hear about Weller's first impression too?? Because I feel like it would have been something like 'My first impression was that she was beautiful.... and that she was somehow both dangerous and vulnerable at the same time. From the moment I saw her I wanted to protect her.' and it would ping true and Jane would stare at him while he stared at the floor and ughhhhhhhhh why would you rob me of this opportunity show, whyyyy
Patterson's database just flagged that one of the fake documents made by Sandstorm's forger guy was just recently used-- and so they realise that Shepherd is in Bangkok. Dun dun dunnnnnn. They also still have no idea where Weller and Jane are either and are very stressed about it lol
Oooh wait Jane is answering again? Are they alternating and we just didn't get to see Weller's last question, or?? And ugh she answers that yes she's lied to him about something important. It's interesting that the question doesn't ask them to admit what the lie was, but that could either be bc the writers didn't want to have to go into it, or bc the Hacker Chick just wanted to plant that seed of distrust between the pairs and cause them to have an argument about it later. Of course this question doesn't have much of effect on Jeller bc they've already had their big reveal of all the lies and the subsequent fallout. Well, most of the lies, anyway. She's still got her Emma lie and he's still got his 'I'm stupidly in love with you but have made you think I'm not' lie. Though technically his lies-- that he's in love with her, that he hooked up with Allie and Nas to distance himself from her-- are more omissions than outright lies. But then aaaaaahhhhh Hacker Chick asks what the best/worst thing their partner has done for them (again, for strangers this would be an awkward one to answer bc they wouldn't really have anything to say) and ughhh Weller answers and talks about her getting inside his walls and ugh he's avoiding her gaze and fidgeting as he speaks, but then looks up and meets her eyes as he half-whispers that the worst thing was the same answer and ugh she can barely look at him, her eyes drawn to the screen instead, because ugh when he started speaking it seemed like her getting inside his walls was the worst thing-- which it did turn out to be as well, but there was more emphasis on it being the best thing and she must hardly be able to believe that he could ever consider being vulnerable to her like that as a good thing but the screen pings True and ugh she swallows and looks like she's trying not to cry and ughhhhh save me. And then the last question is hers, and it's about why they chose to work with their partner/why did their partner choose them, and Weller looks at her kinda like 'crap, how's this gonna go' but also simultaneously 'yes please tell me how you feel about working with me because I need to know that you'll stay' and ugh she says she chose him bc he's honest and loyal-- and then meets his eyes and says she trusts him with her life. And ugh he looks down, unable to hold her gaze, and you just know he's thinking about how he didn't protect her from the CIA and how he treated her like shit when she came back and how she still believes in him even after all of that and how he doesn’t deserve it. And he's probably also thinking that she's among the maybe three people he would trust with his life, with the other two being Patterson and Zapata (Reade's temporarily taking a break from the list) and yet the others are his hand-picked teammates who he has worked with for years and who have always proven themselves to him. Jane is an ex-terrorist who he's known less than a year and who has already lied to him and betrayed him more than once, yet he would still willingly put his life in her hands because he knows she would never let anyone hurt him. Ughhhhh. But then she says that he didn't choose her, he was forced to work with her, and he looks up and frowns a little bc the computer shows that she believes that's true but it's so totally opposite to what he feels and tbh I almost expected him to say something about it right then and there, but there's no time bc a little compartment pops open and there's locks to unlock. Also I just noticed that the symbol in the screen is a triangle with an eye in it overlying an inverted triangle, almost like Patterson's earring! What does it mean?? Are Jeller being followed around by a literal sex-symbol because I'm really starting to feel like the universe is trying to send them a message.... but anyhow the escape-rooming begins, with Jane finding two keys to Weller's one, then realising that the fourth lock is opened by the third lock itself. God she's so smart. I bet Weller is finding this super hot rn, bc I’m pretty sure the rest of us are. And then ta-da, a wall slides aside to reveal a window into the room next to them, where the blue dudes are still searching for keys. A message on the screen says that pressing the big button by the door will let them out, but fill the blue guys' room with deadly gas. Which means that getting to the files first-- saving a whole bunch of people-- will require killing two people in cold blood. Well, shit.
Well, if anyone tells you that slow internet never hurt anybody, show them this clip. This guard died bc of it, poor guy. But first he was talking with her about how Remi and Roman probably miss her and I'm like nooooope they certainly do not, my man. Ugh I'm so sad he had to die, though, like it was absolutely coming from the moment she got locked up, but ugh we were SO close to having her in US custody and then... sigh.
Ugh my precious babies are desperately searching for another way out, bc they refuse to press the button. And then ugh the blue guys unlock their last lock and see the same message-- and I appreciate that one of them tries to stop the other from pressing the button. Thanks for having honour, bro. But it's still not enough, and the other guy hits the button, releasing the gas-- into their own room, while Weller and Jane's door swings open. Plot twiiiist. Jane automatically moves for the door-- they have a mission, after all-- but Weller refuses to leave the guys to die, so he smashes the window and the two of them drag the blue guys out. Ugh, my babieessss. Unfortunately being good people means that the green team has gotten a chance to get out ahead of them, and they chase them down, catching one and absolutely kicking his ass in a freakin' awesome tag-team way, because these two are literally the most badass partners ever. And so they make it to the finish line-- but after the other guy in green, who grins at them like a cocky S.O.B. But then whaaat the white-team lady is there-- she's actually the other half of the sister duo. Niiiice. Jane's all ‘????’ and the chick makes a joke about her being a ghost and lol I love how absolutely done Jane is with all of this. Poor woman is daydreaming about being back on the sunny streets strolling along with Weller rn rather than being here trying to prove herself to these criminals lol. She tries to argue that both partners were supposed to get to the finish line, yet greenie is on his own, but Hacker chick shoots down that attempt. But then Weller, my precious cupcake, my secret cinnamon roll, argues that the whole point of the button test was to ensure someone with a moral code got the files, and reminds her that he and Jane risked the win by stopping to save two strangers. White-clad sister seems to like him-- er, I mean his argument-- and so the main hacker chick is all 'eh, sure, I love a twist' and tosses the hard drive to Weller. I bet Patterson, as amazing as she is, couldn’t have succeeded like that. The green guy tries to attack Weller but neither Jane or the hackers' bodyguards are having any of that shit lol. Nobody touches Weller :P And loooolll the chick reminds them that their fates are now forever intertwined and they look at each other kind of awkwardly and it's just like well guess you guys should just go ahead and get married now then...
Uh ohhhh, Zapata's friend from the precinct called her and says that the detective investigating Coach Jones' murder is about to start an inquiry into possible evidence-tampering in the case-- and oh no this could go very very badly. Ugh my baby I am so worried for you
Blah blah Shepherd has tracked the guy with all the toxic stuff and killed him, and now has all the goods (or should I say 'bads', heh) on a boat, headed for NYC. Whatever, lady. The team will stop you.
Aw Reade is having a session with Dr Sun. I still really, really don't like that the person now hearing all their most intimate confessions is someone brought on board by Nas. I also can't forget how she treated Roman like a monster, and incorrectly diagnosed him with a really significant disorder. I just don't think this team should be trusting any shrink that has any connection to government agencies rn. I do like how they're sitting in chairs side by side though, so he doesn't feel suffocated or trapped. And ugh he says that using is gun is triggering (heh) his flashbacks, and Dr Sun suggests he maybe separate himself from his triggers... which would mean leaving the team. As much as I love Weller and his Angels, I really do want Reade to come back eventually... I mean, Zapata would be so sad without him??
Speaking of our angelic team, they’re down in the lab, looking at the booty they just scored from the hackers. There's a loooootttt (maybe enough to drive a season three...??). Good thing it's in safe hands with these guys, who would never use it for evil. And then they find the !!Truman Protocol!! which is like the redactiest of redacted documents, but they can see that every POTUS since then (well, up to Clinton I) has signed it as well. Jane also spots a stamp with the letters COGS at the bottom, reminding them that Nas' source told her to follow the cogs. Ugh, my super smart baby girl, I'm so proud. And so somehow it all connects to Phase 2, but the question is how....
As any sensible person does in the face of such pressing matters, the team goes out for drinks. And ugh I just love Weller and his ladies having these little bonding moments away from the NYO, the four of them banding together because they are the only ones left fighting this war. Their ranks have been diminishing one by one, and they are the last ones standing, the handful of Spartans facing an entire army alone. Tbh though I really want to know which of them suggested the drinks; I'd like to think it was Weller, partly suggesting it to help morale but also partly so he might have a chance to talk privately with Jane with a little bit of liquid courage on board. And ugh he's so supportive now, reminding them all that they had a huge win today and now have a really significant new lead that will help them stop whatever Sandstorm is planning, and then ugh his savvy sister Zapata is like 'time for some Jeller alone time' and pulls Patterson away with her. Ugh, what a wingman. It's interesting bc we really don;t see thaaaaaat much direct Weller-Zapata interaction, but somehow I feel like-- of the pre-Jane team, I mean-- they are the most similar to one another and have a super good understanding of each other? He seems to act like the older sibling towards both Reade and Patterson, but with him and Zapata, they're more on a level? He still gives the orders but she subtly gives him crap about it and isn't shy to disagree with him if she thinks he's wrong. Like they'll never be tight like she and Reade are, but I definitely think they've got a really cool connection. But ANYWAY, the Wingman has departed with the Cockblock and this means-- as Weller ensures by literally looking over his shoulder, omg-- that Jeller have a rare moment of privacy. Jane's just happy chilling there with him; she has no expectations or anything, she's just so content to be sharing this kind of bonding moment with the others and to get to sit next to Weller and listen to him talk and catch the occasional hint of his cologne and just feel safe and wanted and included ugh. But Weller's been dying to have this talk since the polygraph because he needs to correct this belief she has that he's only working with her because he's forced to. He literally loves working with her, and that was part of what made her betrayal and subsequent absence so hard (and what made him so grumpy when she came back)-- because not only had he 'lost' the woman he was in love with, but he also lost the best partner-- yes, partner-- he'd ever had. She made him better, in every way, and for a while he lost that, and without it he spiraled. He was irresponsible in his personal life and barely holding it together in his professional one. So to hear, today, that she thinks he doesn't want to be working with her, doesn't want her around... he couldn't let her go on believing that. And ugh his voice is so cute when he tells her that he was never forced, and she teasingly calls him out on it a little bit, reminding him of when he'd refused to let her out in the field, etc. There's no malice to it though, her casualness showing that she understands he's moved on from that steadfast rejection of her, and his joking response of 'doesn't sound like me' is a way of acknowledging her point, but also subtly communicating that he in the here-and-now isn't the same/doesn't hold the same views as he did then. She smiles at that, then reassures him anyway, telling him that she actually meant they were 'forced' together initially by Shepherd's design and now in the mutual drive to take Shepherd down. And then he basically tells her he's completely okay with that, because though their enemy started them on this, it has enabled the to save a lot of people, to do true good.
AND THEN, he says 'and...' and takes this deep breath and shifts to face her, clearly working himself up to say more, and Jane is all "what?" because she's felt the change in the air between them; this wasn't just one of those patented Weller Reassurances where he bolsters the morale of his team. That was the lead-in to something else, something he's about to tell her, and she stares at him as he stares right back and tells her that all of it led him to her. And she smiles a little and looks away, not exactly knowing how to respond because she doesn't know where this is going, and it's kind of like when someone pays you an unexpected compliment and your body doesn't know how to react because your mind is instantly scrambling, and ugh she clearly expects him to kind of just stop there, or change the subject or something,,, and it's only when she looks back up him and he's still looking at her so intently and adds 'and you to me' that her face softens, filled with such looooongingggg and her breath escapes like a tiny little sigh and ugh there's such emotion in her eyes and then he shifts his arm and idc that it's out of shot, I am certain he is now lightly grasping her elbow, and he tells her that the two of them coming together is something he would never-- he literally emphasises the never-- want to undo. Which means that having her in his life is worth more to him than the ability to erase every bad thing that has happened since her appearance in Times Square. And ughhhhh there are tears forming in her eyes and there's a tiny shudder in her breathing because oh god this is everything she's ever wanted, to have his forgiveness and his love and have a chance for the two of them to start over, because she loves him, never stopped loving him even when she hated him, and so right now she can hardly believe this is real and ugh the way she looks down for a moment like she's drawing on the courage to believe in it and go with it, not even realising she's already subconsciously leaning toward him just a teeensy bit even before she looks up (because her body is already a step ahead of her poor overwhelmed mind and heart) and then she looks up and sees him also leaning in just a fraction, eyes still on hers, no mistaking his intent but also ready to pull away if she indicates this isn't what she wants, but ugh then her eyes meet his and she leans a little closer and it's like that tiny movement tipped them over the edge, and then he's slowly closing the gap and she tilts her head and they hold eye contact until the last moment and her eyes have just fluttered shut, scarcely half an inch of space separating their lips, literally no possible doubt remaining that both of them don’t desperately want this-- when Patterson calls out, and I love that while Jane pulls back like a startled deer (or rather, doe), Weller literally does not move. He's probably just too busy thinking 'I'm gonna kill you, Patterson' but I'd like to think it's also bc he's not afraid or embarrassed to get caught. Literally everyone else in the team already knows he's in love with Jane anyway (and actively ships it) so what's the point in trying to hide it? I love the fact that Jane glances back up at him and gives him that small smile before pulling away, and he just grins at her like 'so close...' while she scrunches her nose and mutters 'yeah'. They are very much on the same page when it comes to their exasperation with interruptions haha. And then ugh they're so cute as Patterson arrives, both straightening in their seats and Jane clearing her throat while Weller pretends his dumb grin is about the drinks and not the almost-moment he and Jane just had (because oh my god she was going to kiss him back) and then Zapata rejoins the table with a grin that says she knows very well what just got interrupted (while Patterson remains oblivious, clearly having been focusing on her footing rather than what was happening at the table as she approached), and as the conversation resumes, Jane looks back at Weller with this shy but elated little smile because oh my god he was going to kiss her. And okay maybe it didn't actually ~happen~ but it was literally so close to happening that it had the same end result anyway, which is that they each know now that THEY BOTH WANT TO DO THE KISSING WITH EACH OTHER. LONG-TERM AND EXCLUSIVELY. Someone help me I’m dying over this aaaaahhhhhh
Okay so I literally couldn't care less about Shepherd's scenes (except about the fact that they cut short the screen time of characters I actually like) but damn this overhead boat shot is actually pretty gorgeous. Nice one, team. And then she's all 'shiiit the FBI has the Truman Protocol' and we see the Green team with Parker and ooooh I wonder if they recognised Weller and Jane at the hunt?? Did they know she was the prodigal daughter and he was the golden boy? And yaaaass I love seeing Shepherd’s day get ruined. But then woah lady, no need to put a hit out on Weller because of it??? I agree with that slimy Parker, I thought he was vital to everything??? What the hell is Phase 2????
Lol the guy checking Zapata out as she walks along the street. Same, bro. And then oh crap, flashy lights and sirens and "That's her" and on one hand I love that they've got literally four cops there just to take her in-- frightened, were we, boys?-- but on the other hand I'm like nooooo don't you dare arrest my baby she's done nothing wrongggggggg (lately) ughhhhh
Aaand okay there’s one down, time for 2x20 lol
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me in 2013 first starting invisible/making jaida: haha no one can see her. this has absolutely no ramifications for her mental health at all
me now: haha. hehe
#FOR REAL THOUGH ITS LIKE. ITS ONLY NATURAL ?#if you went YOUR ENTIRE LIFE invisible to EVERYONE around you#you can see them! but they cant see you!#THATD FUCK YOU UPPPPP BRO#brot posts#and tis only smth im realizing now like back then i was just like#HAHA HEHE SHES SO COOL AND EDGY AND BADASS#and now im like... bro#PLUS SHES LIKE SIXTEEN LMFAOO#i was. 11? 12 at the time? so 16 felt like a whole ass adult#NOW IM LIKE OH MY GODDDD SHES 16#i mean shes almost 17 in the story but like. Still
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