#it took me forever to get to the last two chapters because ok i ended up revising it

[justmeinadaze]

Nothings Gonna Change My World Part 2 (Steddie X You)(Zombie Apocalypse Universe)

A/N: The way I am having fun with this <3

I can absolutely go back to some of these universes and expand in separate series. Especially this one.

Please Enjoy!

Warnings: Steddie X Fem Reader, In universe Zombie Apocalypse survivors Steddie X Y/N, SMUT, dp, dirty talk, and things in-between, FLUFF, in the universe the relationship is already established and they love each other <3

ANGST! Obviously Zombies, Steve is the leader of a community and Eddie is an ex military sniper; mentions of military PTSD (brief) , mentions of Steve being abandoned by parents, mentions of readers sister Kallie being turned and Y/N guilt of that, Reader is kidnapped and the boys save her, mentions of blood, cliffhanger in universe, Eddie talks about his mother dying of cancer (brief), Steve talks about his asshole dad (brief), they ask again how her sister passed but she refuses to answer.

This chapter kinda delves into abandonment issues and fears of losing new people in your life so if that's a trigger fair warning! I have abandonment issues so I get it <3

Word Count: 6765

Chapter 1/Donate to Me <3

“Ok and how did you feel moving around?”

“Like a passenger I guess. It was very much like a movie or VR.”, you sigh as you lean back in your seat. 

You had been answering his questions for over two hours and quite frankly you were exhausted. After the experiment and now dealing with this asshole, you barely even had time to process what you saw. 

“Was anything similar to our universe? Or even your life in general?”

“My sister was still dead. That’s fun.”, you sass as his eyes scan you over. “Um, they seem forever regressed in a time period that has long since past even though my grandma always said the 90s were a blast.”

“Was anyone there you recognized? Family, past friends, relationships?”

Your gaze shifts as you avoid his eyes and prepare to do the thing you do best; lie.

“Um, my ex was there. In that universe, he cheated on me. In ours, he just left me.”

“I see… ok, and you said you just went to bar, listened to a band, went to a party, and then woke up?”

“Yup.”, you reply with an obnoxious pop on that last letter.

“Did anything stand out as odd or feel off?”

You got lost in the void as you ran through the universe you just experienced and couldn’t help but smile at the warm fuzzy feeling of safety that flowed through you when you were around Eddie and Steve. For the first time in years, nothing stood out or felt off.

“Y/N?”

‘Oh, um, no nothing.”

“Ok…ok. Go ahead and head back to the common area. We just served meals so eat, rest up, and we’ll talk again after the next session.”

***

The following day, you felt their eyes on you. Steve was always in a corner doing push-ups or working out in the gym that was provided while Eddie was either smoking or reading on the balcony outside of the sitting area. 

You planned to avoid them for the rest of the time but you were antsy as jitters ran through your hands desperate for a beer to calm your nerves. Stepping outside, you took a seat on one of the lawn chairs without looking his way. 

Before even saying a word, he extended his arm out with his pack in hand.

“Don’t get used to this. These things are fucking expensive in here but…” When all you do is stare, he shakes it finally willing you to take one of the sticks between your fingers and lighting the end. “It’s kind of amusing to me that there’s a universe with an Eddie Munson that doesn’t smoke. He had a point though. Because of my mom I shouldn’t be doing it myself yet here I am.”

Flashing a smirk your way, he visually takes this version of you in as you inhale the cigarette and blow out a big puff of smoke. Compared to the you in the alternate universe, you seemed a bit more rough around the edges. While you never answered Steve’s question about your class status, you did seem like you fit in both. 

You could pass for upper class like the other boy with how clean cut you were with that air of arrogance that screamed everyone was beneath you. But unlike them, you seemed exhausted like someone who had just completed their last leg of ten-mile race. You appeared sassy and confident but to him you also seemed…sad. 

“You said your name was Y/N? In the thing I mean.”, he clarified when your looked at him with confusion. “I’m Eddie. Well Edward but my friends call me Eddie.”

“I don’t care. You and I aren’t friends.”

“Excuse the fuck out of me, princess.”

Your eyes shift his way again at the term remembering him calling you that in the alternate universe and how comfortable he made you feel. 

“I’m sorry. I, uh, yeah my name is Y/N. Doctor dipshit said I had to be sober for this experiment so it’s been a week since I’ve had anything and it’s making me insane.”

“I know how that goes. After our experience I would love a beer.”, he chuckles making you grin as well. “So, uh, if I may how did it feel?”

“I’m sorry?”

“The doctor guy asked me what it felt like in the universe and I told him it was kind of surreal like I was seeing through someone else’s eyes but what was even more crazy was I could smell the smoke in the air at the party. I could practically feel the plastic from the controller when I was playing that game. I, um, I could feel your lips. I can still smell your perfume and cold air that was attached to you when Steve brought you inside.”

Jesus, he could string words together like a poet which you weren’t expecting at all. As he spoke, your brain replayed those four hours as your eyes took in Eddie who had turned in his chair to give you more of his attention. 

“Did you experience the same?”

“I did.”, Steve answers as he saunters around the corner and sits at the end of your lawn chair to light his own cigarette eliciting an eye roll from the other boy. 

“I wasn’t asking you, Harrington, but good to know.”

As the man inhales and exhales, he stares off into the distance towards the skyline. 

“I think that was genuinely the first time I felt happy…being on stage and playing that guitar… Then I saw you come in and I felt like I knew you.”

“Maybe in that universe we had passed by each other a few times before that night.”

Steve’s lips pout out as he shakes his head. 

“Naw, it didn’t feel that way. Did it feel like that for you?”

“No.”

“Just no?”

“Jesus Christ! What do you both want from me?!”

“A straight fucking answer maybe.”, Eddie responds as you rise from your chair and toss the cigarette over the edge of the building. 

“I don’t owe you anything especially an answer.”

As you start to head back inside the long-haired boy’s voice gives you pause. 

“I still don’t think less of you for anything you’ve done. That’s one thing that version of me and I have in common.”

“I don’t either but I do want to know more.”

***

That morning you dragged your sleepy form to the cafeteria to grab some coffee and took a seat at a random table…or so you thought. 

“Kinda starting to feel like you’re stalking me, sweetheart.”

“Jesus Christ.”, you sigh ignoring his breathy laugh as he continues to pick at the cereal in his bowl. “Why are you two even eating together? I thought you hated each other.”

“I mean, we’re going to be stuck together for a month. Might as well make the best of it.”, Steve shrugs as he sips from his own cup. 

You take in his comment as your gaze shifts to the void in front of you. You had numerous dreams about them and a couple about Kallie that were making you feel a bit lonely. You could have some casual conversation. What could it hurt?

“I felt safe with you both. It was an intense emotion but I knew I could trust you. Which is weird because I don’t trust anyone except my sister.”

“Kallie.” You nod at Eddie’s answer surprised he even remembered. “Do you have that tattoo?”

“Yeah and in the same place.”

“It’s interesting what stays the same. My dad is still an asshole, Eddie was still living with his uncle, and you still lost your sister.”, Steve theorized as he casually continues to drink. “I’m sorry, honey. Maybe this universe today will be different.”

“Honestly…I don’t know what I’d do if I saw her face again.”

“Ok, guys.”, the doctor shouts as he claps his hands to get everyone’s attention. “We’re very excited about the second test to see what happens. It seems we had some positive experiences when it came to the first universe. We’re hoping for the same in this regard. Please, if you don’t mind, gather your dishes and place them on the counter so we can start heading to the vessels.”

“Pfft, if you don’t mind. Like we have a choice.”, Eddie snickers as he takes note that his comment made you smirk as well. 

As you enter the experiment room, the three of you separate to go to your different pods where nurses do the same as they had before; making sure you were comfortable and getting your vitals.

“Alright, Y/N, ready for the pinch… Oh I know.”, she coos as you wince. “Dropping down in 3, 2, 1…”

######################

Everything was dark around you when you tried to open your eyes but couldn’t. The feeling of fear heavy in your heart as you listened to people whisper around you. 

“Do you really think she’ll help save us?”

“Yeah, I mean she’s a part of his group so once he comes for her we can use her to have Harrington provide us with a cure.”

“If he has the cure than why hasn’t he done it already?”

“I don’t fucking know! Maybe he’s selfish like his father.”

The sound of your whine gives them pause as you try to break the bonds tied around your wrists keeping you fastened to the chair underneath you. They were using you to get to one of the men you loved. 

If they’d remove the gag from your mouth you could tell them the truth; that he didn’t have a cure. If he had, he absolutely would have handed it over by now. You knew because you thought the same thing.

When you met him, you weren’t aware of what building you were in until you found him rummaging through his father’s desk. When you pulled your gun on him, he held up his palms in surrender insisting he wasn’t here to cause trouble. It took all your energy not to kill him right then and there but a red dot zeroed in on your chest forced you to pause.

The Harrington Virus was the reason your sister was taken from you, dying in your arms before she began to turn into a mindless flesh-eating corpse that you had to put down. 

He told you then about how his father’s company had created a viral weapon to sell to the military but it backfired and ended the world. His parents went into hiding and he spent the last two years looking for a cure feeling strongly it had to be somewhere within his father’s things. 

Over the last six months, you got to know him and his best friend he had been trying to survive with, falling in love with them and trying to help them save the world so to speak. 

While out on a routine supply run, someone took you and here you were.

“Did you hear that?”, one of the men asked cocking his gun as you hear footsteps echo away from you. 

Loud squelching noises make you jump as you prepare for the worst. Your body trembles in terror before the blindfold is removed from your eyes and you blink to adjust to the light around you.

“Everything’s ok, honey.”, Steve comforts as he takes the gag out of your mouth and begins untying you from the chair. Taking in your surroundings, both men who had kidnapped you were now dead with the man’s knife bloodied on the ground beside you. They had brought you to a warehouse of some kind but where you weren’t sure.

“Steve, you shouldn’t be here. They wanted you to come for me! We had a deal!”

“Yeah we did but I ignored it. We can fight about it later.”, he sasses as he grabs your hand and prepares to run before meeting another gun barrel in his face. “Tommy…good to see you again.”

The man growls as he hits Steve with the butt of his weapon and watches as he falls to the side. 

“Good to see you to, Harrington. How’s your dad?”

“I wouldn’t know. He disappeared and didn’t feel the need to take me with him.”, the boy winces as he tries to stand but is pushed back down. 

You step forward to help but Tommy turns the gun on you. 

“Don’t move, Y/N. How could you do this? How could you side with him after what happened to Kallie?!”

“Don’t you dare talk about my sister!”

“She would be so ashamed of you! You said you were going to kill him and yet somehow you managed to fuck him. The first time we saw you two together while scouting we thought maybe you were just trying to get on his good side. Come to find out, no, you actually fucking love him!”

You see the glint of light near the ceiling and your sigh in frustration at both men’s stubbornness. As you hold your palm in the air, Tommy scans you over trying to get a read on what you’re doing. 

“It’s not his fault, Tommy. I promise. These past 6 months we’ve been trying to track down Bill and any notes he had on a cure. We’ve come up with nothing.”

“That’s impossible! He can’t just fucking evaporate into thin fucking air, Y/N!”

“I know! But he will if you kill his son. If you kill him you’ll never have a chance!”

You see doubt flicker across his face for a split second before it hardens once more and raises his weapon in your direction. 

“I’m sorry.” Your voice cracks as you close your eyes and close your fist above you. The second your fingertips make contact with the bottom of your hand, you hear a soft whooshing sound followed by a bullet hitting flesh and when you open your eyes again Tommy is dead on the ground in front of you. “You two are idiots.”, you scold as you lean forward to help Steve to his feet right as Eddie slides into view slinging his sniper rifle over his shoulder.

“Are you alright?”, the long-haired boy asks with concern as his fingers caress the scrapes on your skin. 

“Yeah, come on. We have to go.”

The three of you run and skirt around the undead unseen back to the compound you called home.

***

“Ooooooow!”, Steve whines overdramatically as a girl pushes a bandage over the cut on his forehead. 

“Oh, don’t be such a baby.”, she teases as she lightly taps his forehead and turns to work on you. 

“I’m fine, Robin. Don’t waist the supplies.”

“I didn’t ask if you were fine, Y/N. I am designated nurse lady so let me at least look you over, please and thank you.”, she grins making you smile as well as you rolled your eyes. 

The year you and Kallie were with Tommy and his group, you rarely smiled. Everything you two did there was to find the Harringtons and find a cure especially after Tommy’s girlfriend got infected. There was very little time for play or fun and your sister hated it. She always talked about leaving the group and heading off towards the beach with your back to the water. 

You insisted on staying because you felt like you were close to the cure. Maybe if you had left Kallie would still be here…

When you joined Steve and Eddie at their base with the high school, everyone seemed so much more at ease. They worked together to get things done and made time to have fun which you didn’t realize you missed till your first night here. 

“Ok, do you think any more of them will come back?”, Wayne asked at the desk just outside of the nurse’s office. 

“I don’t know. Y/N always said Tommy was in charge so I guess it depends on who takes over and if they even want to bother.”, his nephew answers as they continue to look down at a map on the table. 

“Well, we’ll continue to keep an eye out and I suggest Steve and Y/N don’t leave this place alone for any reason until we can confirm.”

“Can I shoot them in the legs if they do?”, Eddie jests as his best friend pushes him to the side lightly.

You feel all eyes in the room watch you as you silently leave the area and head to your shared room with the guys. The best part about being in a school was each classroom was utilized as a different room. This particular hallway was for bedrooms but soon you would have to open another with the more people you let in. 

The generators kept the electricity running so you were able to have mini fridges and food in each area along with music and anything else you may need. 

“Ok, we can fight about it now if you want.”, Steve announces as they both come in and shut the door. 

Shaking off your jacket and tossing it aside you continue to ignore them as they do the same. Fashion was scarce in the apocalypse but goddamn did they look good. Steve always wore that brown leather military jacket he stole from a gun store nearby but depending on who he was meeting that day was what he wore underneath. For your rescue, jeans and a crisp black t-shirt with black running shoes were in order but if he was meeting a new member of the group or a group outside to do exchanges with he donned slacks and a button up shirt to look “presentable.” 

Eddie never cared as long as he was comfortable. When you guys went out scavenging, if he found a band shirt he enjoyed he brought it back home with him wearing one of those with a pair of jeans or sweats and always having his DIO vest over that which he had modified himself to hold his sniper bullets should he need them. 

Before you met them you knew about Eddie Munson but not enough to form an opinion. With Tommy, you had done research on Steve and he was flagged as an accomplice but deemed invaluable because there wasn’t much information on them together. When you and Kallie did stake outs, you saw them spend time together and watched him practice firing his weapon, surprised about how well he shot. 

After coming here, you learned that his uncle had been in the military before he came to live with him and took him out to a range to show him how to shoot. Eddie himself signed up for service and did a tour labeled as the best sniper marksman in his unit. He had planned on doing another tour but while on leave the world ended. 

Your eyes continue flick between them as Eddie leaned against the arm of the couch with his arms folded across his chest while Steve stood in front of you waiting for you to speak. Unable to find the words in that moment, you stepped forward and smacked him hard across the face.

“We had a deal. If anything ever happened to me; if I got kidnapped or was in a situation that was dangerous you would leave me behind because people on this earth and finding a cure was more important!”

“I made that deal for you but I’ve never liked it especially now.”

“Oh my God, Steve, you are so fucking selfish! We’ve come so close numerous times to finding an end to this! I’m just one person in a sea of others who need your help!”

“That’s how you see it. I don’t.”

“I don’t care! The world needs you!”

“The world may need me but I need you!”, he snaps, placing his hands on his hips as he exhales. “WE need you.”

“That’s…that’s not fair.”

“No, sweetheart. What’s not fair is making us choose. To us…you’re our world. We love you.”, Eddie adds softly as your eyes meet his. “Now, how about we stop pretending you’re sacrificing yourself for the world and be honest. You don’t want us coming to save you because you don’t want to be responsible for another death.”

“Even though we tell you time and time again that what happened with Kallie wasn’t your fault.”

Your jaw tightens as you glare at the wall. 

“I got stuck in that building. I should have been the one…”

“No, baby, no. Your sister made her choice because she loved you. What happened wasn’t because of you or her. It happened because my father was greedy and helped create a weapon without knowing anything about it.”

Tears started to fall but as they stepped forward, you hastily ran out of the room.

***

“Hey, Y/N. Can you go the library for me and grab me a book about infections? I’m trying to read up on alternative remedies for green things.”

“Gross and you can’t get this, Rob, because…?”

“Because I asked you to.”

Laughing and patting her shoulder, you got to your feet as you headed away from the group in the cafeteria to make your way for the library to get what she needed. Part of the reason you put up with Robin’s sass is because she reminded of Kallie; 90% attitude and sarcasm with a kind, genuine heart. 

As you opened the door music caught your attention as you stepped inside. 

“Miss Y/L/N.”, Eddie smiled as he gestured towards the table that had a candle lit in the middle surround by cafeteria trays of food in front of three seats. 

“I’m going to kill Robin.”

“Ah no you’re not.”, Steve teases as he takes your hand and guides you to your seat. “On our menu today, we have school lunch hamburgers with a side of fries and a can of soda Eddie brought back with him from his last supply run.”

“Aaaaaand…”, the long-haired boy sings as he reaches into his vest and pulls out the desert to display to you. “A chocolate cupcake.”

“Oh my god. What did I do to deserve this Michelin star meal?”, you joke with a smile.

“You’re you.”, Eddie grins as he reaches over to place his palm over yours. “And you went through a lot today. Not just with getting kidnapped but these were people you were with for over a year. They were family…”

“Kallie was family. You two…are my family.”, you sigh as you swallow the lump in your throat. “I’m sorry, I just—”

“Hey, no reason to apologize. You’re a stubborn hardass. We get that.”, Steve interrupts sarcastically, chuckling when you punch his arm. “If anyone gets that, honey, it’s us. I may help watch over those people out there but you both mean everything to me. I don’t know where I would be if…”

Your heart broke as you watched him shift into a memory he only spoke about a handful of times. When the virus broke out, he was at home but did what they rehearsed as a family and ran to his BMW to speed to the airport. His parent’s security stopped him as the helicopter flew over his head and neither of them even gave a cursory glance at their son as it flew away. 

The area became over run and all Steve could do was sprint as he tried to remain in one piece. He was cornered at the high school and right as he thought he was about to die; gun fire went off before a ringed hand reached from behind a gate and yanked him inside. 

Eddie had been with his uncle which he was thankful for as both men ran to the closest safe place they could find. Some of the nearby kids were hold up there and he did what he could to save them. Once it was cleared of the infected, he and Steve worked together to build their little community. 

“I’m sorry, baby.”

Flashing you a big smile, he reaches for your hand and kisses the back as you three eat your meal. When you’re finished, Eddie beams your way mischievously and presses something behind him before a new song lightly flows through the room. 

“Wise men say

Only fools, only fools rush in

Oh, but I, but I, I can't help falling in love with you.”

“You’re such a dork.”, you giggle as you take the hand he extends to you and guides you to your feet where you both lightly begin to sway. 

“Shall I stay?

Would it be, would it be a sin?

If I can't help falling in love with you.”

“I was terrified when you didn’t come back.”, Eddie murmurs above you as you lay your head against his chest. “I tried picturing you as one of those things and I just… it killed me. When Steve got Tommy’s letter, I was relieved you weren’t dead but I was so angry…I wanted to burn that whole place to ground.”

As your gaze shifts to look at his face, you realize his eyes are glazed over as he simmers in his fury. Even though the world had ended, Eddie still carried PTSD from the time before. While he was a decorated soldier, during his tour he saw a lot of things he carried with him that had you holding him at night as he cried from a nightmare. 

 Zombies were one thing but men coming after him with weapons and intent was another. 

“I love you, baby. I’m right here and I’m not going anywhere.”

Blinking back into the moment, he softly smiles before kissing your forehead and spinning you into Steve’s awaiting arms. 

“Like a river flows

Surely to the sea

Darling, so it goes

Some things, you know, are meant to be.”

“I don’t know what we’d do without you, honey. Jesus, wait until we tell our children we met their mom when she pointed a gun in my face.”, he chuckles as he playfully dips you. 

As your face falls, he wraps his arms tightly around you.

“Take my hand

Take my whole life too

For I can"t help falling in love with you.”

“We’re going to figure this out, Y/N. Whether it be a cure or a safe place in this chaos, we’ll get everything in order and start a family.”

Tilting your head back, his lips land softly on yours as his kisses slowly get more passionate. 

“Wait…what if someone…comes in here.”, you pant making him smile as his thumbs caress your cheek.

“I’ve booked this suite all night, baby. It’s just you, me, and Eddie till morning.”

After quick peck again, you fall to your knees and fumble with his belt as he removes his shirt above you. As soon as his cock springs free, your lips wrap around it as he places his hand on your head to guide you. 

“God, Y/N. That feels so fucking good.”

Reaching behind you, the long-haired boy laughs knowing what you’re looking for as he comes closer and pushes down his sweats. Both men groan and exhale heavily as your mouth switches between them while pumping your hand to spread your saliva along their shaft. 

“Come here, sweetheart.”, Eddie breathily instructions as he jumps up on to one of the tables and helps you out of your jeans and panties before guiding you till you were straddling his waist. 

After lifting off his own shirt, you couldn’t help but kiss along the scars on his chest like you always did as he petted your head. He had so many old wounds from battles he didn’t talk about; war, the apocalypse, his father when he was growing up. 

Eddie gave you the baseline of information. When his mother went missing he cried every day but his father didn’t care, hurting him over and over till he was arrested. One day overseas a bomb went off knocking him back and causing the little cuts on his stomach. Before he ran with Wayne, the trailer park was over run and he smashed out a car window to hot wire it so they could get away. 

Each scar had a different story but they made up the man he was and you loved every part of him. 

You felt safe with him; both of them.

“F-Fuck, princess.”, Eddie mewled as your gradually descended on to his length. 

Cupping your face in his hands, he tenderly trailed kisses from your forehead to your lips. 

Feeling Steve’s large palms on your ass, you lifted up to allow him more access as he carefully guided his own cock into your hole. 

You would never get used to the full feeling of them both inside you but just like out in the world, in the bedroom you felt safe. 

Between their bodies, nothing else mattered.

You could see the stars, heaven, and even the future. A future with no virus, smiling kids, and happy home filled with hope. No more nightmares or screams. Just peace. 

“Hey, hey. A-are you ok? Are we hurting you?”, Steve asked as Eddie whipped the tears that had begun to fall. 

“No…I just love you both… so much.”

Grinning they kiss a random part of your body as they begin thrusting into you again at a steady pace. 

“We love you to, baby. Mmph— everything’s ok.”

“We love you.”, Eddie repeated as his jaw fell open in a silent moan. “You feel so good.”

Wrapping your arms around his neck, you clung to him as they found a faster rhythm allowing their cocks to hit every sensitive spot inside of you roughly. 

“Cum, baby. You can do it, honey. That’s it.”, Steve coaxed as your body shook and the coil snapped. “Atta girl. That’s our beautiful girl. Shit.”, he grunted as his hips sloppily slammed his release into your behind.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck. Up, Y/N.”, Eddie lightly commanded but the other boy took the initiative, lifting you off his friend’s dick and allowing you to tilt over him as you bobbed your head, catching his release on your tongue as it spurts down your throat. “Mmph—good girl. Good girl.”

You giggle as Steve pulls you down the floor and you utilize his arm as a pillow while the long-haired boy hops down to snuggle you to his chest. 

“We got you one more thing.”

“Why?”, you blush as you listen to his strained groan while reaching for his bag above his head. 

“Because we love you. Unless you don’t want it. I can take it back to the store and—” His grin grows as you lightly smack his arm and Eddie chuckles behind you. 

As soon as everyone calms down, he produces a small diamond ring that has you smirking his way. 

“What’s that?”

“A ring.”

“For what?”

“For you.”, the other boy answers. “If you want it, that is.”

You can’t help but blink as you sit up and they follow. 

“I don’t understand.”

“Yes, you do.”, Steve replies way too calmly. He was definitely meant to be a leader. “You’re just scared.”

“I am not. What on earth do I have to be afraid of?”

“Besides the ever-present doom of the end of the world?”, Eddie jokes as he leans back on his palms. “Maybe losing us…like you did Kallie… Trust me, babe. I was a solider. I understand that fear better than most.”

“So do I. My parents abandoned me in the middle of all this.”, Steve gestures around him. “I watched them fly away while people around me were dying but, honey, you can’t live your life in fear…especially this one. We could be gone at any second and if anything happened to me than I’d want my last memories to be a full life with you and my best friend.”

After thinking for a moment, you casually take the ring from his hand and pretend to inspect it.

“I think when you give a girl something like this you’re supposed to ask her a specific question.”

They both laugh as they grab each one of your hands. 

“Honey, I’ve been love you since I met you. You’re smart, sweet, and so fucking beautiful. The first time I held you I knew I’d never let you go. Will you marry me?”

Cupping your cheek, Eddie turned you to face him. 

“I don’t trust many people but when I saw you running around that building trying to sneak up on Steve I knew you were special.”, he chuckles as you laugh at the memory. “I love your sarcasm and your strength and you motivate me to open my heart not just to you but people around me. You make me a better man, sweetheart. Will you marry me?”

Before you can answer, Dustin busts through the library doors as they pull a blanket over your lower half to cover you. 

“Henderson! Rude, man—”

“Steve, something… you need to come…now…”, the boy panted. 

Noting his genuine concern, both men pulled up their pants and began to follow. 

“Stay here.”

“That’s cute you think I’d listen to that.”, you answer his command sarcastically as you tug up your own jeans and push past them to see what’s going on. 

As you enter a hallway by the doors, you see Robin running around a woman on the floor trying to assess her wounds as she tries to catch her breath. 

“H-H-Harrington. I need…Harrington…”

When Steve steps through the crowd, her eyes widen as she forces herself off the floor and limps to him, collapsing in his arms as he catches her. 

“Y-Your father…I escaped…I found…help…”

“I don’t understand.”

Swallowing in frustration, she extends her palm and hands him a crumbled-up piece of paper. 

“C-C-Cure.”

His amber eyes widen as he twists his head to meet your own irises as your mouth falls open in shock behind the long-haired man who insisted on keeping you behind him to keep you safe.

The woman notices as her bottom lip trembles and extends her arm to reach for him. 

“Eddie?”, she whispers.

The man scans her over again before kneeling beside his friend to take her hand in his. 

“Mom?”, his voice cracks at the realization. “What…where have you—”

#########################

Muffled screaming is the first thing you hear as your eyes snap open and the pod door slowly slides out. 

“Everything’s alright, Miss Y/N, I’m going to—no! Please don’t do this again!”

You ignore the nurse as you swing your legs over and promptly go on the hunt for Eddie. That feeling you had in the universe was still heavy in your heart; that worry for him as soon as he knelt down. 

The people around you were crying and still trying to catch their bearings as nurses tried to calm them. 

“Zombies were everywhere! They had us cornered!”

“My wife was trying to kill me!”

“I swear I could feel their teeth!”

A hand suddenly intertwined with yours, tugging you forward out of the room and down the hallway. Steve’s head was on a swivel as he searched for the other boy but you couldn’t take your eyes off him as that air of confidence from the other universe still seemed to cling to him as that rush of safety washed over you. 

“Ed?”

At his soft worried tone, your gaze shifted as you both entered the dorms and saw the man before you pacing as his chest heaved in what looked like anger. 

“Everything’s ok, Munson.”

“Everything is NOT ok.”, he growled. “Did you see her, Steven? She was in so much pain and needed help… and why was she talking about your dad?!”

“I-I don’t know. That’s not me and even if it was that Steve felt just as confused—”

“BULLSHIT!”, Eddie screamed as he lurched toward him and shoved him against the wall. “My uncle and dad worked for your father’s company in this universe! If Bill did something to her in that other one…”

“Eddie, I swear on my life, I have no idea what my father does with his business but I’m sure he wouldn’t be responsible for what happened to your mother.”

“What did happen?”, you ask making the long-haired boy jump, forgetting you were even there.

“She died…cancer…what was odd though was she had no family history of it.”, he rumbled as his angry eyes focused on Steve’s. 

“So…this was the first time you saw here in a while…?”

The man’s voice shook as he answered your question. 

“Since I was six…”

“Eddie…I don’t know much about either of you in this world but so far in both Steve’s father has been an asshole who abandoned his son. 2 for 2 says a lot…which makes me think that in this universe here, it’s most likely the same.” Steve’s eyes flutter slightly at your assessment as the other man’s grip around him loosens. “Whatever Bill Harrington is involved in…I don’t think he’d have his son help or know about it and not because he doesn’t want him to get in trouble.”

“My dad has told me numerous times I’d never live up to our name.”, the man whispers. “I’m so sorry, Ed. I swear if I knew anything I’d tell you. I’d have told you a long time ago.”

Eddie snickers as he steps back. 

“When? When you were ignoring me or when your friends were calling me a freak? You always treated me like I was beneath you especially at school because only you rich pricks should have been there according to you. Us kids of employees should have been relegated to some cheap public school, remember?” Steve’s jaw tightens as his eyes flick to you before finding the boy’s again. “Which is why I don’t FUCKING UNDERSTAND why 2 for 2 you and I are friends and fucking THIS girl.”, he shouts as he gestures towards you. 

“Don’t look at me. I don’t get it either.”, you growl as you fold your arms defiantly.

“You HAVE to know us or even one of us.”, Steve insists. “You come from money right? Have I seen you or something at a party or a charity thing? Anything?”

“First off, fuck you. Second, I don’t come from money. My father’s side does.”

“Our private school has your last name.”

“No, it has my great grandfather’s last name. That doesn’t mean I know you.”

“Jesus, you’re really fucking stubborn.”

“I don’t know why you’re quizzing me! I’m just as confused as you! Look, I just came in here to make sure Eddie was ok and now I regret it. This is why I didn’t want to make friends or whatever.”

“Because they die or leave?”

Your eyes narrow towards the long-haired boy as you glare his way. 

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me. In both universes, you talked about your sister and how you were afraid of us leaving you. Whether that be through judgement or death. In the first one your boyfriend cheated and then in this one your ‘family’ kidnapped and scolded you for your choice. Is it the same in this universe? Are you afraid if you make friends with anyone you’ll end up alone again?”

“Fuck you, Eddie.”

“What happened to Kallie?”

“None of your fucking business!”

As you start to walk away, Eddie grabs your arm to pull you back and in return you smack him. He doesn’t say a word as his grip on your bicep slides to your wrist and his head hangs.

“I’m sorry. You’re right…it’s none of our business. Just…seeing my mom and then feeling everything that other Eddie felt.”

“I understand.”, you sigh as you lean your forehead on his. “It lingers…the feelings…”

“We never got an answer.”, Steve murmurs causing you both to look his way. “We asked you to marry us. That Steve seemed confident and smooth but he was really fucking nervous to ask you that.”

“So was Eddie. He…you made him feel like he wasn’t just a robot who could wield a gun. You gave him hope. Hope for a future that he struggled to believe in.” 

As the feelings and their words overwhelmed you, you tried to leave again but his hand kept you in place and Steve came up behind you till his chest was against your back. 

“Please, don’t go.”

Eddie’s shoulders shook as he began to cry and as your arms wrapped around him, he rested his face into the nook of your neck as he clung to you, holding you tightly to his chest.

###################

@baileebear @jasminelafleur @twirls827 @dashingdeb16 @myherometalhead @starboygf @alba8688 @crybabyddl @fireeyes-on-teller-dixon-grimes @utterlyinsanity @hardladyheart @yesimabratandwhataboutot @chelebelletx @season4steve @fic-lover-29

[moonchild9350]

Sign the Dotted Line (Chapter 7)

Summary: You reconciled with Minho and Minho spent the night. Your trip in Japan continues. You both decide that your relationship can withstand anything, as long as you have each other.

Pairing: idol Minho x fab reader

Genre: fluff, smut 18+ MDNI

Word Count: 2.5k

Warnings: p in v penetration, creampie (don't)

Notes: Ahhhhh this is it! The final chapter. I want to thank everyone that has made it to the end. This is my first series and it was such fun to write and share with you. I appreciate every kind comment, reblog, like that was said/given over the last two months! I hope you enjoy this last chapter and if you would like check out my other works as well :)

If you would like to move to my general taglist now that the series is over, shoot me a message or dm!

Series Summary: You are living an ordinary life until one day you come across a notice from your favorite band Stray Kids, that the company is looking for a girlfriend for one of it's members Lee Minho. Thinking you have nothing else to lose, you apply. This one action causes your life to change forever.

Series Masterlist

Please do not copy, translate, modify, use, or repost this work elsewhere without my permission. ©moonchild9350 (2024)

PREV

You awoke with a start, your eyes snapping open. You looked around the room until your eyes landed on Minho, fast asleep next to you. You couldn’t believe he was here, next to you in bed. Carefully, you scooted closer to him, snuggling into his side. Minho stirred, opening his eyes briefly before pulling you close to him. You chuckled, resting your hand on his chest, feeling the steady beat of his heart. Minho buried his face in your hair, giving you a squeeze.

“What time is it?” He mumbled, his voice laced with sleep.

“Don’t know,” you replied, “I didn’t get a chance to check.”

Minho tickled your side at your response causing you to squeak as you tried to wiggle away, but Minho just held you tighter.

“Let’s sleep a little more,” Minho said. You hummed in response, more than ok to get some extra sleep. Before you knew it, you were fast asleep once more, safe and warm within his arms.

“Wake up, wake up, wake up.” Someone was telling you to wake up and you felt something poke your face again and again. You swatted at whatever was poking you, that something chuckling. You opened your eyes to see Minho, wide awake, continuing to poke your forehead.

“Why are you poking me,” you whined, twisting your head away and trying to get away from him. Minho giggled, chasing after you. He caught you once more, hovering over you, as you parted your legs so he could slot himself between them. He took in your features, from your messy bed hair, to your tired eyes, before landing on your lips.

“So beautiful,” he whispered, before leaning down to kiss you. The kiss was gentle, his lips moving softly with yours. You felt him shift slightly, feeling his cock at your entrance. With a rock of his hips, you gasped as he buried his cock within you. You gripped his arms as he set a steady rhythm, his eyes on your face watching your every reaction. Minho grasped your hands, bringing them on either side of your head, intertwining your fingers with his.

He was in heaven, the girl he loves beneath him, lost in pleasure because of him. He loved the feel of your hands in his, the way your breasts pressed against his skin, the way your warm walls fit snugly around his cock.

He shifts his hips so he can go deeper, the change in position causing you to loudly moan as he hits your sweet spot again and again. You feel that warm feeling building up within you, within your core. You squeezed Minho’s hands tightly as he rolls his hips into yours again and again until you reach your high, that warm feeling spreading to your toes, to your belly, causing you to arch into the man above you.

Your walls clench around Minho’s cock, causing him to groan before he’s thrusting his hips sporadically before slamming into you one last time, his hot cum filling your walls. Minho leans down to kiss you, his tongue finding its way into your mouth as he deepens the kiss. He leans his forehead against yours and lets out a sigh before pecking a kiss to your lips once more.

You watch as he leans back on his knees and withdraws his cock, his eyes trained on his cum seeping slowly from your pussy. He licks his lips and then smiles, happy that he’s made his mark in you once more.

“I’ll be back baby, let me clean you up,” he says as he gets off the bed. He cleans you up and helps you sit up, your hair now more of a mess than ever. He chuckles at the sight, tussling your hair so it’s even more of a mess.

“Minho!” you whine, slapping his hand away. You couldn’t help but giggle, Minho joining in.

“Let’s get ready baby. We have to meet the others soon.”

You nodded your head in agreement and followed Minho out of bed. You watched as he got dressed and walked over to you, wrapping his arms around your waist.

“I’ll be back to get you ok? Gotta go back to my room and change.”

“Ok,” you said, wrapping your arms around his neck. You reached up on your toes to give him a kiss. Minho’s hands slid down to grip your ass, giving the flesh a squeeze causing you to yelp. He chuckled at your distress and made his way to do the door, opening it and softly closing it.

You made your way to the bathroom, deciding to take a shower. You felt sore between your legs, an occurrence that you’ve come to expect now whenever you slept with Minho. This time it was a reminder of your new start with him. After your shower, you finished getting ready, opting for a comfy fit, putting on jeans and a tshirt. You brushed your hair and did your makeup. You smiled at your reflection, noticing that afterglow, causing you to blush. You could say you were truly happy.

You heard a knock on the door. Hurrying out of the bathroom, you grabbed your bag and phone, slipped your shoes on and opened the door. There was Minho, looking gorgeous as always. He gave you a smile and reached out his hand to grab yours. You smiled as you took his hand and followed him down the hall to the elevators. You couldn’t believe you were about to walk out in front of everyone, holding hands with Minho. You honestly never thought this day would come.

If you thought it was a sight to behold, it was nothing compared to how the boys reacted when they saw you two walk their way hand in hand.

“Oh my god,” Jisung exclaimed, shock on his face.

“You’re holding hands, you’re smiling and you both look….happy.” Felix gushed, a big smile on his face.

You giggled at their shock, understanding where they were coming from. After all, you and Minho have bickered and been sworn enemies since you meant a year ago. Chan smiled at you two, happy that things worked out. He was proud of Minho and his growth.

You made eye contact with Harin and Seoyun who were sitting with Chan and Hyunjin. Harin winked at you while Seoyun smiled, both girls beyond happy for you. Minho walked to an empty couch and sat down, dragging you down with him. He pulled you closer to his side and wrapped his arm around your shoulder. You were giddy with excitement, finally feeling like a real couple.

You all chatted, waiting for instructions for today’s gig. The boys had yet another fan meeting to go to and they were allowing you, Harin, and Seoyun to go, so you could watch from the sidelines. You were excited to go, as you knew it would be a fun outing. Once the meeting was done, you all headed to the cars, filing in one by one. Minho never left your side, his hand wrapped in yours whenever possible. He would bring your hand to his lips to press a kiss every now and then, sending shivers down your spine each time.

Once at the venue, the manager showed where you three girls could sit and watch. The venue was full, hundreds of fans lined up to meet with the boys. You were excited to watch the process, always seeing fan videos of what goes on. You were on the edge of your seat the whole time, watching as the fans met with each member one by one, as the boys spoke with the fans and had a mini dance party.

You watched Minho, a smile constantly on his face as he interacted with each fan and the other members. He seemed happier than usual and you hoped your new found relationship was part of the reason.

The end of the meeting came fast, as all good things do, everyone filing out of the venue. You and the other girls were escorted to the backstage area where the boys were. They were filled with energy and horsing around, laughter filling the area. Hyunjin ran to Seoyun, wrapping her up in a hug, while Harin snuggled closely into Chan’s side. You stood awkwardly on the side, not sure if Minho wanted you by his side. You remembered what happened last time you tried to take initiative and be close to him.

However, his eyes met yours and he beckoned you over, a small smile on his face. You grinned and made you way over to him, stopping in front of him. He pulled you in and placed a wet kiss on your lips. You were shocked, not use to the public affection…not that you were complaining. Ohhhs rang out around you both as the boys teased you two. You laughed with them as Minho had you stand in front of him, wrapping his arms around your middle.

“I’m hungry!” Changbin yelled, a pout on his face.

Seungmin shook his head at the outburst. “Why am I not surprised,” he said, teasing his hyung.

“Shall we go eat?” Chan asked.

Everyone agreed to the suggestion, as everyone was actually hungry. There were a group of eating places nearby, so you all decided to walk over and enjoy the night air. The banter was light and playful, the boys talking animatedly about the fan meet and making fun of each others costumes. They did all look pretty cute, you had to agree.

You all ate well, filling your stomachs with yummy food. You hadn’t felt this happy in a while, your cheeks hurting from all the laughter. Minho talked with you when he wasn’t chatting with the others, making sure to include you in the conversation. You were very happy to be involved. What you loved the most, however, was how Minho doted over you, making sure you had enough to eat or drink. He made sure you were able to pick out your favorite foods and even let you try some of his food. He kept his hand on your lap at all times, when he wasn’t spooning food onto his plate or yours, occasionally giving it a squeeze.

The flight back to Korea is tomorrow. This trip definitely would be one to remember. Your relationship was on the mend. You had your boyfriend back and you were proud to call him so. You couldn’t wait for the adventures that awaited both of you. **1 year later* Today was the day of your meeting with the manager. She wanted to discuss your last two years with the company and how you wanted to proceed. You couldn’t help but reminisce, thinking back to the first time you were in this office. You were hopeful and excited, this opportunity laid bare before you that anyone would kill for. You remembered your shock after your first encounter with Minho. The memory caused a pang in your chest, but knowing what you know now, it was just a roadblock in your relationship.

You are thankful you were able to meet the boys, their kind, gentle nature, and how they welcomed you with open arms. They were your refuge during the dark months of solitude, when you felt more lonely than ever. You were thankful for Harin and Seoyun, their friendship meaning more than they could ever know. How they took you in and encouraged you, wept with you, and cheered you on.

The door opened, pulling you from your thoughts, watching as the manager sat down opposite you like she did two years before.

“Y/n, we meet again.” She said, a smile on her face.

You chuckled and said, “yes, yes we do haha.”

“Well here we are two years later. Your contract has ended and so we need to discuss how you want to move forward.” She looked at you with curious eyes but she also seemed nervous, not sure how you were to react.

“Well, I don’t want to renew the contract.” You watched as she took a breath, understanding on her face laced with sadness.

“Ok, well…” but you stopped her, holding up your hand.

“I wasn’t finished. I said I don’t want to renew the contract because I feel Minho and I don’t need a contract to remain in our relationship.”

She looked at you, her eyes wide. You’re not sure she expected you to say that. She quickly recovered however and cleared her throat. “Excellent, that’s excellent news y/n! I’m so happy you feel that way. If that’s how you both feel, then we have no problem in agreeing with that.” She gave you a warm smile.

You smiled back, happy to she was willing to agree with you.

“I guess that takes care of that. I really am happy Minho has found his match. It’s been hard these last few years, many people have come but no one has stayed given his…temperament.” She stopped to consider her next words. “But it seems he’s found his match in you y/n. Thank you for giving him a chance, really.”

You nodded your head. It has been two tough years. You have been through a lot mentally and emotionally. You were ready to call it quits and leave more than one time, but thankfully you stayed…even though you had to, but that was besides the point. You and Minho truly didn’t need the contract to define your relationship. You both felt comfortable with each other to forgo continuing the contract and to just have a normal relationship. You both got the idea from Chan and Harin as their contract had recently ended and the company had let them forgo renewing another one.

“Thank you so much,” you said as you got up from your chair. She smiled at your on your way out, watching as you left the office. You let out a breath once you were outside the door and made your way to the practice room, the path familiar by now. You were happy this time, unlike so many others as you reached to open the door. You felt warm inside as you were greeted by the typical pile of boys on the floor as they loudly talked over one another.

Chuckling at the sight, you closed the door behind you and sat down on the couch, watching as Jeongin and Seungmin fought their way from underneath the others. Once everyone was untangled and slowly getting up from the floor, clutching their stomachs from laughing, you were noticed, a loud chaos of “y/n!” rang throughout the room.

You smiled and said hello, crossing your legs to settle in. Minho came up to you and kneeled in front of you.

“Hey baby,” he said, a smile on his face.

You grinned at your boyfriend, “hi.”

Minho pulled your face to his and kissed you, once, twice, three times before Changbin yelled “get a room!”

You pulled away from Minho with a smile, the boy grinning from ear to ear. You loved this man with all your heart and as long as you had each other, you could take on the world. Yeah, you two would be just fine.

Taglist: @jehhskz @jeonginsleftcheek @simpforleeknaur @armystay89 @palindrome969 @slut4hee @ivydoesit23 @amarecerasus @kaysungshine @fun-fanfics @baby-stay92 @artemisdoe @emily21morgan @athforskz @jazziwritesthings @imperfectlyperfectprincess1 @jisunglyricist @tsunderelino @hyuneyeon @sillyhal @queenmea604 @bloominhos @partyparty-yah

[gingiesworld]

Family Is Forever

Chapter One

Wanda Maximoff x GN! Reader

Warnings: Angst. Heartbreak.

Taglist: @fxckmiup @ginnsbaker @gb12d @casquinhaa @angrywhisperslove @louxbloom @starry-night17

18+ MINORS DNI

Wanda Maximoff used to have the life she had dreamed of since Y/N had built up the courage to ask her out many of years ago in college. Although the getting pregnant in her third year of college was never a part of their plans but Y/N had stepped up and proposed to her. Vowing that she would never have to go it alone in raising their children.

What they didn't expect was that their relationship would soon become toxic. As Y/N was the main bread winner for the household, Wanda wanted to find a job of her own for when the twins where at school so she got a job at Harkness Cafè. Working during the schoolday before the twins were home.

Although, both of their jobs were tiring, and Y/N always made time for the twins. They never really made time for each other. So as the time went on, the distance between the two of them grew. The cuddles and intimate moments were non existent. They were like two passing stars, never destined to collide.

"I can't do this anymore." Wanda whispered one night as they lay side by side. "It hurts because I don't feel like you're here."

"Wanda." Y/N tried as they turned to face her. "I'm sorry." Was all they whispered as they sat up, leaning their head against the headboard.

"I don't know what happened to us." Wanda whispered, her eyes glistening as tears threatened to shed. "I just don't know."

"I do love you Wanda." Y/N told her sincerely, nothing but truth was behind their eyes. "I really do but I guess love just isn't enough to make a marriage work."

"I don't think it is." Wanda whispered. "Maybe we need a divorce."

"You're right." They whispered as they stood up, reaching for their pillow. "Maybe we just lost touch of who we are, with work and raising a family."

"Stay." Wanda held their hand. "Just hold me one last time." Wanda asked as they took a shakey breath, getting back in bed beside her, opening their arms for their soon to be ex wife. Pressing a kiss to her head as she squeezed her eyes closed, feeling heartbroken at the end of their marriage. The two who had dreamed of growing old together.

Y/N had packed their bags on their day off, packing their car before the twins came home. Once the two 10 year olds were home, the two of them sat the boys down to talk.

"Your mom and I are getting a divorce." Y/N told them softly. "I am going to be finding an apartment nearby so you guys can still come and stay with me whenever you want."

"Your O'pa and I still very much love each other and you both." Wanda told them as she wrapped her arms around the two of them. "But it just isn't really working between us and we can't keep lying just to keep this marriage working."

"But we're family." Tommy whispered as Wanda took a deep breath. A soft smile on her face.

"A family is forever." She told the two as Y/N smiled at her, before her eyes met Y/N's. "We can never truly leave each other, even if we tried."

"This is what is best for us." Y/N told them. "We just want what's best for you both."

"But what about holidays and our games or competitions." Billy asked them both.

"We will still spend holidays together, if that is ok with your mom." Y/N told them. "And you know we will never forget about your games and competitions. We're your biggest fans."

"But you're moving out?" Tommy questioned as Y/N just nodded.

"I am." They told them, taking Tommy into their arms. "I wanted to stay here to talk with you both first because you two boys and your mom will always be the most important people in my life."

"I love you O'pa." Tommy spoke sadly as his tears started to fall.

"I love you both so much." They told the boys as Billy joined the hug. "But I want the two of you to always respect your mom, ok? This is in no way her fault, it's not yours either. This is no one's fault." The two nodded before Wanda stood up behind them. "Now go and wash up for your dinner."

Once the twins were out of the room, Wanda stood over Y/N who looked up at her sadly. Taking her hand in their own as she took a deep breath.

"Where will you go?" She questioned as they smiled at her. Pulling her to sit in their lap for the last time.

"Bucky's for now." They told her honestly. "I have an appointment on Monday to look for an apartment in the area, and then I will get in touch with Jennifer too so we can sort out the divorce."

"Ok." Wanda took a deep breath as Y/N rubbed her leg soothingly.

"You're not going to lose anything." They told her honestly. "I don't want you to lose anything."

"But, you can't afford to keep the house and pay for an apartment." Wanda told them as they shook their head, moving Wanda gently from them before they gestured for her to follow them to the room, heading into the closet and opening the safe. "Is this deeds?" She asked as she looked at the paper with the twins names on it.

"I started to buy it when I got my first pay rise." They confessed. "I wanted to make sure that the twins were looked after no matter whatever happened to us."

"You did this?" Wanda asked them with tears in her eyes.

"I wanted to look after my family, make sure the three of you were looked after." They reached in and took out two bank statements. "Once the final payment on the house was paid, I started to put that money into two different saving accounts. College funds for the twins, I still put the money in the accounts each month." They also handed her another statement and envelope. "And I have been doing the same for you, just in case something happened to me, I wanted you be looked after."

"I don't know what to say." She whispered as Y/N shook their head.

"Don't say anything." They told her. "The card for your bank is in this envelope with the pin."

"Thank you." Wanda whispered as Y/N placed the papers with the twins names on back inside the safe and locked it. "I just."

"It's ok." They told her. "I know I may not have been the best partner for you but, I just wanted you to be looked after. That was all I ever wanted." They kissed her lips one last time as her tears fell from her eyes. "I'll see you next week." With that Y/N had left the house, leaving Wanda who started to sob uncontrollably.

The moment Y/N had made it to Bucky's apartment with their bags, he gave them a sad smile.

"This is for the best Buck." They told him as he patted their shoulder before helping them grab their bags and leading them to the guest room. As he left them alone, they sat on the bed in the darkness. Looking out of the window at the first night they are going to be spending the night away from their family.

The next morning rolled around faster than anticipated, Y/N had got themselves ready for work before finding Bucky already filling two cups of coffee.

"You look like hell." He stated as he handed them the coffee.

"Thanks." They muttered as Bucky observed them with concern in his eyes. "I couldn't sleep." They took a sip of their coffee before looking up at their best friend. "It's just that I don't sleep when I'm away from Wanda and the twins. Even on business trips, I barely get three hours of sleep a night." 

"That's not healthy." Bucky stated.

"They're my family Buck. I went straight from my college dorm when Wanda got pregnant straight to the house." They told him. "I have spent over a decade living with my family and I have screwed that up."

"How did you screw it up?" He asked them as they sighed.

"I didn't work on the marriage." They told him. "I completely took the woman I have loved for most of my life, the woman I still love with every fibre of my being, I took her forgranted. I did that!! Not her. Me."

"You should tell her what you just told me." Bucky told them.

"It won't be any use." They told him. "I think this divorce is still set in stone because my job is quite demanding too."

"Y/N." He spoke softly.

"I can't keep her in a marriage that she isn't happy in." They told him. "I don't want that for her. We can make the co-parenting thing work but that's it." With that they left the apartment and made their way to work.

[smolwritingchick]

The Bangtan Gal Chapter 93- Our First Time

Summary: Jennie celebrates her birthday in Japan and Jungkook makes it a memorable one.

Genre: Jungkook fluff! And smut! (A for effort on the smut! I'm sorry if you're a bit disappointed with the smut writing but I'll continue to get better. Practice makes perfect!)

Words: 15,000+ 

Author's Note: It's been a while! I missed writing this story, I'm happy to be back at it. I missed you all dearly! I have been overthinking the HECK out of this chapter. Like ideas kept coming but then I was worried cause it was like ah...is this too much or not that realistic? I had a vision but I kept going back and forth regarding realism and contemplated deleting stuff but then I wanted to keep it. So, I hope you enjoy this and it was worth the wait. I wanted to make it romantic, fluffy, intimate, and a bit vulnerable in a way. I mean this is a critical point in their relationship and I didn't want to screw it up.

I just feel like these two will be comfortable with each other and certain about their love. Everyone especially black women should be loved on and cherished by their significant other and I thought a lot about how Jungkook would feel in this moment with Jennie in the story after pinning for her for so long. 

I'd say Summer Walker's Nobody Else and Best Part by Daniel Caesar & H.E.R is super relatable to JenKook. Loveeee these song so much. Both are so beautiful and always get me in my feelings.

Also: context on Booker T and his Spinaroonie which will be mentioned in the story. Black wrestlers mean a lot to me and he has been a huge part of my childhood.

Soon after chilling for a bit, and celebrating my birthday on May 10th, I will be working on my wrestling story next to update that and then I will be back writing the next chapters for Bangtan Gal. There will be two chapters updated for this one, the Muster chapter which will have Jin and Jennie's wrestling match, and then the next story chapter :)

So, bear with me for the slow updates. It may take a bit but I will try my best to not take forever. Again, thanks for sticking with me and I hope this was ok. Lemme know what you think! Until next time!!

Currently me after uploading:

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A loud sigh escaped Jennie's lips as she sat down in the middle of a wrestling ring. Here she was alone at Big Hit, in one of their rooms which had a standard sized wrestling ring for her and Jin to practice for their next match. Lately, it had been used as a private room for Bangtan's Oldest and Youngest members and held a lot of gym equipment as well. 

For a while now, Big Hit proposed for Jennie and Jin to get professional wrestling lessons. Jin stuck with learning the basics but Jennie wanted to learn more and asked for extra lessons as wrestling had started to become a new hobby for her. Despite the soreness and occasional bruising she'd endure while training, wrestling was fun and stress relieving. Their professional lessons were a few days a week as they learned the basics and prepared for their choreographed match to make sure things went well. Juggling dance practice, recording music, events, and wrestling lessons took a while to adjust but the two members remained dedicated and wanted to put on a great video for ARMY when it was time to record their match.

Big Hit wanted to ensure their safety as well and thought professional wrestling lessons would help. Because at the end of the day, Jin and Jennie were still idols and the last thing the company needed was two of their artists injured off of wrestling. And Jennie knows from watching WWE that those wrestling injuries are no joke. She was grateful every day for not suffering a serious injury and hoped to keep it that way. 

Since her hair was dyed red, Jennie wanted to portray WWE's Lita for their next match while Jin was still researching which wrestler to portray. Since the matches are predetermined, Big Hit wanted Jin to win which made sense to Jennie and she was all for it. For the past week, Jin and Jennie would go over what they wanted to do for the match and their trainers were extremely helpful in making their vision come to life while assisting in producing the match.

With it being evening time and everyone had left for the day, Jennie stayed behind to practice while wearing some shorts, knee pads, and a tank top. She wanted to get a few moves down and hoped to perform them better as she kept jumping off the top rope safely onto a padded mat to pretend it was her opponent.

After drinking water, she stood on her feet and stretched.

"There you are!" Jungkook's bright voice filled her ears as she turned around and smiled.

"Hey! Sorry, Jungkook, I should have texted you. I wasn't ready to go, yet. I wanted to train a little bit more,"

"It's all good, honey. What are you working on?" he strolled over to the ring and went in, wearing a hoodie with the hood over his head and sweatpants.

"My moonsault. You know the move where you backflip off the top rope and onto your opponent lying on the mat?"

"Yeah! I know the move," he reached out for her and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"I'm sweaty," she giggled and tried to pull away but he wouldn't budge.

"I don't care," 

He smiled and leaned down to give her multiple kisses on her lips which she immediately returned, smiling into the kisses. 

"Show me what you got with the moonsault. I can help you," he said while she looked at him in surprise as they pulled away.

Jungkook even learned a bit of wrestling just in case he wanted to participate in future matches. He was still trying to convince the rest of the members to join but so far no luck. But hopefully one day.

"A-are you sure? I should practice more on the big mat first," she said with a hint of nervousness.

"I'm the Golden Maknae, I got this," he flashed a big grin. "Where do you want me, Jagi?"

"O-okay. Um, let me move the mat and you can take its place," she pulled the mat to the other side of the ring while Jungkook got on his back.

"All set! Let me know when you're ready, Jennie,"

Nervousness continued to overwhelm her as she replied, "Kookie, are you sure this is a good idea? I don't think I'm ready to perform it on someone just yet,"

"You never know unless you try! Come at me. Let me see what you got,"

"Fine, fine. Stay still," she got up the top rope, trying to remember everything she could for the move. "Three...two...one...go!"

She backflipped off the top rope gracefully and landed right on him. However, a loud groan escaped his lips as her knees landed on his stomach instead of her torso, which made her freak out.

"Ah! Oh my God! Are you okay!? Why am I such a klutz!?" she got off of him to see him clenching his stomach with his face twisted in discomfort. 

Oh, this was so bad. She knew she shouldn't have decided to practice on him. All that training went out the window as she saw her man in pain. 

She cupped his face while he continued to clench his stomach. "Kookie, I'm sorry! Are you okay!?"

"Yeah..." he grunted, '"We'll work on it,"

"I am SO sorry!" she exclaimed after releasing him. "I did so much better, earlier! I promise, I did! I just miscalculated! I can do it, better! But I'm not quite ready to do the move on someone! Ah...why did I agree to this!? My knees were on your stomach! God, I know that had to hurt. And I got my knee pads on, too? Sheesh!"

As he watched her ramble, Jungkook couldn't help but laugh and stopped clenching his stomach, sitting up.

"You're cute when you freak out like this," he giggled.

"You're not hurt!?" she exclaimed.

"I am a little. My stomach hurts but I was exaggerating the pain. It doesn't hurt that bad," 

"I-you idiot! Don't do that!" she smacked his arm, making him laugh again. "You had me thinking I injured you! I was about to freak out and cry to Bang PD!"

"Wow, you were going to do that? I should have kept up the act,"

"Shut up!" she giggled as they both stood up. "You're a piece of work, you know that?"

"So, I've been told," he smiled and placed a warm hand on her cheek, brushing his thumb against it. "You did good, babe. You just gotta work more on the delivery of your moonsault. I say Jin stands no chance against you in the high flying department,"

"Thank you. I'll keep practicing on the mat, for now," she kissed his cheek and placed the mat where it was before.

"How are you and hyung coming along with the match?" he asked as he stood across in a corner, leaning against the top turnbuckle with his arms crossed.

"It's going so well! Jin still gotta figure out who he wants to be. I gave him some suggestions, so he's researching to get one of their personas down. And once he does choose the wrestler, then the trainers can try to teach him some of their moves to add to the match. I lowkey want him to be Booker T from WWE. I told him earlier as a suggestion and he said he'll think about it. But yo, if he chooses him that would make my day. To watch Jin do the spin-a-roonie though...that will have me crying," she laughed at the idea with Jungkook.

"Can you dig it, SUCKA~!" Jungkook said Booker T's wrestling catchphrase in English with Jennie as the two laughed again.

"Yeah, hyung would be so extra with his persona. I can't wait to see who he decides to be. And I'm looking forward to being front row to watch it this time instead of on video,"

"Haha, you're in for a treat. Man, all this makes me want to go to a WWE event one of these days. If we're back in America and they're doing a show close to where we are, I want to go!"

"I hope so too, so you can go. I'll come with you,"

"It's a date!"

"Speaking of dates, we still need to go to a rock concert together like you wanted,"

"Yeah! I gotta research that too whenever we are free. I have no idea who will be on tour but no matter what we have to do GA! And we must crowd surf! It's gonna be fun, I promise!"

The lovers could see the date now. She was on top of his shoulders, singing the lyrics to whatever song was playing from one of her favorite bands while he vibed and smiled at her having the time of her life. It needed to happen soon. 

As she continued to practice her wrestling, Jungkook's eyes began to roam down her body, as he pondered about his self control. Her dark skin glistened in the lighting of the room from the sweat of her workout and her hair was in a messy bun. Every day the want for her increased and her birthday couldn't come fast enough with the way his body reacted to her. He wondered if she felt the same.

As her birthday drew near, Jungkook's anticipation and nervousness kicked in tenfold. It was a huge step and he hoped everything would go well and he could make her feel how wanted and loved she is. 

"Did you hear me?"

"Do what?" Jungkook snapped out of his trance and looked into her eyes.

"I asked, since you're here do you want to train with me, too?" she repeated.

"Yeah, why not. I could use a workout before we go back," he took off his hoodie to show his tank top, revealing his muscular arms as her eyes eagerly checked them out.

Now this was a little dangerous. Jennie was already trying to keep herself in check to not let her dirty thoughts get to her. Shaking the thoughts away, the two trained back and forth, practicing moves. She was grateful for it and it was nice to have a partner to assist. But as time went on, she began losing focus because, in the back of her mind, her desire to be intimate with her man had gotten stronger, these days. But maybe...just maybe...

Jungkook currently had his arms around her from behind in a waist lock while she struggled to get out of it. With him breathing down her neck and his firm arms holding her, she seemed to have completely lost focus. 

Abruptly, she pushed back against him to grind, making him sharply inhale.

"You know that should be a disqualification," he said in her ear as his hands began to roam down her body.

"Hm, well, there is no referee in sight. So, what now?" she turned in his arms. 

Before he could reply, she pulled him by his shirt to smooch him as he groaned softly against her mouth. Their kissing became needy and his hands traveled down to her ass, squeezing it. She gasped at the sudden action which led him to slide his tongue into her mouth and lift her up as she wrapped her legs around him. As he proceeded to walk forward to press her up against a corner, Jennie cupped his face and held onto him.

She wanted him so badly. She was ready and felt herself getting aroused that she didn't even care where it was as long as it was with him. With Jungkook, as much as he wanted to touch her and lose control, he didn't want it to be abrupt like this. With every last restraint, he set her down and reluctantly pulled away, running a hand through his messy hair.

"Did I do something wrong?" she asked, catching her breath from their passionate kissing.

"No, of course not. I want this and I want you. Believe me when I say I've been wanting to touch you and make you feel amazing for a long time, now. But you deserve a bed, Jennie,"

Her heart fluttered at how serious he sounded about that.

He stepped forward and placed his hands on the top rope, connected to the top turnbuckle, trapping her in the corner. "And I want to take my time and kiss every inch of you...and I want to hear you say my name again when I make you feel things no one else can because you're mine...but not now. Not here. It'll be on a bed. And soon. I promise,"

"You say that and expect me not to pounce on you? You're giving me images that I want to become a reality, now,"

"You do the same to me,"

"And I was only going to ask for you to come to my studio. I mean...there is a couch,"

He chuckled at the suggestive thought. "And a bed for your first is even more inviting,"

"Touché,"

"Wait a little longer for it, okay?"

She smiled and nodded. "Okay. I know it'll be worth the wait,"

He returned her smile and leaned back in to kiss her passionately, not ready to let her go just yet. However, their making out was cut short when they failed to realize the door opening. A loud clearing of someone's throat was heard, making the couple quickly back away and turn to who was there.

Of all people...it was Bang PD. 

'This would be my luck...' Jennie thought to herself as she bowed with Jungkook apologetically. 

She was mortified while Jungkook blushed out of embarrassment. 

Jennie thought everyone left but then she realized she had forgotten Bang PD had told her he would also stay late to finish up some work. He must have come by to say goodbye to her since he was done.

"Jennie..." Bang PD let out a sigh, shaking his head as he looked at the couple.

These kids...boy was he amused at the scene. 

"Y-yes, sir?" she answered, flustered.

"When you told me you would be staying late to practice, I didn't mean making out in the ring with Jungkook. You two should be working," he replied with his arms crossed.

He scolded them for not focusing on training and then laughed about it in the end, wishing them a good night and to next time focus on work. After he left, Jennie and Jungkook glanced at each other and ended up laughing at the embarrassment.

"Oh my God...I can't believe that just happened," she got out of the ring with him. "We are NEVER telling the boys about this. This is going to the grave,"

"I second that. Do you think he's going to mention this to anyone?" he feared.

"Oh, fuck outta here, I hope not!"

----------

"I cannot believe this..." Jennie grumbled with her arms crossed as she sat in the van with the members, on their way to the airport.

She had her fair share of goofy moments but this right here was currently number one. The boys were struggling not to laugh as they snuck glances at her wearing a large Pikachu Onesie. The reason? Losing a bet with Jungkook on who could beat who in Smash Bros, last night. She tried her hardest but he prevailed in a best out of 5.

"You look adorable," Jungkook giggled.

"Be quiet," she snapped at him in a playful tone, earning another giggle from him. "I can't believe I have to walk out in public with this on. Why? You know Dispatch is going to be there taking photos."

"You did bring it on yourself. You should have beat him in the game," Yoongi chuckled.

"Wow." she shook her head. "I am loving the support, right now,"

Bangtan had some fan events in Japan just before their 3rd Muster in Seoul and were headed to the airport to get on their flight. Once they arrived at the airport, fans and reporters were already there to take videos and photos. Jennie watched as the members and staff made their way out of the vehicle as she tried to mentally prepare herself to be seen with the onesie.

About to get out of the car, Jin turned back to her and chuckled. "Are you coming?"

Seated next to him by the window, she groaned. "Yes..."

With a smile, Jin helped her out of the car and surprised sounds from the crowd were heard when they saw her in the onesie, along with giggling and various comments on how cute she looked. Being a good sport, Jennie grinned and waved at the cameras, walking inside the airport with everyone else.

She laughed, forgetting about the embarrassment, and began to pose, with the members. Miss Bangtan even started playing the part of Pikachu, while reporters ate it up. After photos, the group started going to the destination of where their flight was as the large group of fans and reporters followed them.

"Jennie-ah, why are you wearing a Pikachu onesie?" she heard a fan ask who was recording her with their phone.

"I lost a video game bet against Jungkook," she grinned sheepishly, earning giggles in response.

Safe to say, her look went viral and became an instant classic BTS moment for ARMY as they tweeted their thoughts:

'Look at Jen-kachu!'

'The fact that she agreed to this lmfaooo.'

'Jungkook was the cause of this!? LOL the Golden Duo never has a dull moment!'

'Wait I thought this was photoshopped! WHAT!?'

'Jennie blessing us with her cuteness!'

'I deadass thought it was a joke but Jennie is actually at the airport as Pikachu!'

'Hahahaha not Jennie getting caught in the mix of losing bets!'

'I LOVE cute Jennie! This made my day!'

--------

Because of her birthday, the staff treated Jennie to have her own suite in the hotel BTS stayed while the rest of the members roomed with each other. The room was huge as it even held a kitchen, which Jungkook was currently using to his advantage while Jennie was out eating with the Hyung Line for her birthday. Jungkook's birthday plans for Jennie were in motion as he and the rest of the Maknae Line decorated her suite with balloons and other birthday accessories. 

"She is going to freak!" Jimin beamed.

"Yeah, this looks like it's going to be her best birthday, yet! You gotta tell us her reaction when she sees the room," Taehyung added.

Jungkook grinned as he decorated. "I will! You two okay continuing to decorate? I want to start the cake,"

"Yeah, go ahead! I still can't believe you're going to bake for her. This is adorable," Jimin giggled.

Jungkook wanted to go all out for her birthday and thought of baking for her. She always baked for him and the rest of the boys. It would be sweet to have her receive a cake that was made from the heart. The Golden Maknae researched some good birthday cake recipes and chose to bake a small red velvet cake for her. 

He whipped out all the ingredients he purchased the night before and placed them all on the counter to begin while the oven was preheating. Getting right to work, Jungkook was diligent in making sure he followed the directions and mixed the ingredients while checking to see if the measurements were fine.

"Do you know what you're doing?" Taehyung teased while walking over to him, trying to throw him off as he mixed everything in the bowl.

"Go away!" Jungkook playfully shouted at him, turning away.

"You sure you don't need help?" Jimin added to the teasing.

"No!" Jungkook exclaimed. "You two just continue decorating and stop messing with me,"

However, Jimin and Taehyung decided to continue messing with him by playfully hitting him and throwing some decorations his way, which resulted in Jungkook setting the nicely mixed bowl down and running around the suite to chase them. It didn't take too long for him to beat them up before going back to working on the cake. Once in the oven, Jungkook put a timer on his phone and continued to decorate with the guys.

"What do you plan to do with Ennie when she returns?" Taehyung asked.

The question caused Jungkook to smile to himself as his heart leaped. To spend the day with the girl he had fallen for and was proud to call his girlfriend was something he'll cherish forever. He wanted everything to be perfect because she deserved the world. For her birthday, Jungkook convinced his hyungs to let him and Jennie have the entire day together. He was happy they all agreed and that he'd have some sweet alone time with her. He thought long and hard about how he wanted to spend the day and hoped she loved what he had planned.

"I have it all planned out but don't want to jinx myself and give it away. I just hope to make it as special as possible," Jungkook answered with joy. 

"No matter what you do, she'll love it. I mean it's Ennie. She appreciates everything we do for her,"

"And we're happy to see you be the best boyfriend for her. Our ship is still sailing strong, isn't it Tae?" Jimin praised.

"Indeed!" Taehyung high fived him with enthusiasm.

Jungkook chuckled and blushed at the kind words. "I sometimes still can't believe she's mine. I'm really happy I told her my feelings, that day,"

"Us too, Jungkookie," Jimin patted his back. 

After Jimin and Taehyung left, Jungkook went to where the bedroom was to start decorating it. She had told him she was ready and he hoped that tonight would be special for the both of them for that first time. To take that next step in the relationship. 

Later, his phone began to buzz and he took it out of his pocket to see a text from Jin.

Jin: We're back at the hotel! Meet us in the lobby.

JK: On my way!

--------

To Jennie, she was with the rest of Bangtan and patiently waited for Jungkook. Her tummy was full from the delicious breakfast and she had a big smile on her face. Her birthday had been filled with great vibes so far and she couldn't wait to see what else was planned today. 

"Jennie~!" Jimin ran up to her with Taehyung to embrace her. "Happy birthday!"

She giggled and returned the hug enthusiastically. "Thank you~! I feel so loved! First, it was the breakfast, and now the hugs from you and Taehyung!"

"I'm glad you're enjoying your day so far. It's only going to get better,"

"Ooh? More surprises? I wonder what's next. That breakfast hit the spot. Japan has some amazing food,"

As they all chatted, Jungkook finally came down on the elevator to see Jennie chatting with the guys. Sensing his presence, she turned and grinned. 

"Kookie!" she waved as he strolled over to her.

"Happy birthday!" he grinned and embraced her tightly, spinning her around as he lifted her in his arms.

"Thank you!"

"We'll leave you two, to it," Namjoon smiled and began walking to the elevator.

"Yes and please just stay safe. And no, I will not blow up your phones to get updates. I promise," Jin chuckled and waved, following Namjoon.

"Have fun, today! We'll see you, eventually," Jimin giggled and left with the rest of the members.

"Oh? They're all leaving? Even Jin? What a surprise," she said in wonder. "So, it's just us?"

"Yeah, you're with me for the rest of the day," Jungkook proudly said.

"What?! Oh, that's perfect! How'd you get them to agree? Especially Jin?"

"I am the Golden Maknae," he grinned.

"You always say that shit, give me the details! I want a proper answer," she playfully hit him.

"Haha, I told them I'd treat them to Korean beef when we return to Seoul. So, they were fine with that. They eagerly agreed once I mentioned food,"

"I like that. So, where to?"

"You'll see. Let's go,"

As they were en route to their destination, Jennie continued to scroll on Twitter to see the sweet messages from fans for her birthday. And then she smiled when ARMY began to notice that Nike and a Nike PR followed her Instagram. She was excited to announce her being sponsored by Nike and was just waiting for the OK.

As soon as they made it to the destination, Jennie looked around in awe.

They were at Universal!

"Universal Japan!? Oh, hell yes! We about to have a TIME, today!" she cheered and put a black mask on with him as Jungkook laughed at her enthusiasm, agreeing.

After they checked in, they walked inside the park while Jennie looked around, amazed. She always wanted to check out amusement parks in other countries. She can check this off her bucket list.

"Follow me," he said as she walked closely with him.

"Oh, wait! I wanna take a photo with Hello Kitty!" she pointed out the mascot taking photos with the children.

Jen waited patiently for her turn, smiling under her mask at the adorable kids. Then, she kept her mask on and posed with the peace sign while Jungkook snapped the photo. She'll be sure to tweet it on Twitter, later.

Walking inside one of the stores, the large variety of headbands caught her attention.

"Soooo many options! Look at all these headbands," she looked through them.

After looking around, the two decided to get matching headbands. Once they put them on, they took cute selfies together and even some silly ones. As they walked further into the park at Universal Japan, Jennie began to hear the Harry Potter theme song, taking her by surprise.

"Wait a damn minute...are we-are we going to Harry Potter World!?" she exclaimed. Once she turned to Jungkook and saw him nod happily, she jumped and squealed excitedly. "What!? Oh my gosh! Wait, you took the test!?"

"I did. I'm a Ravenclaw,"

"Ahhhh! It suits you! So much to do! Okay! We gotta get wands! We gotta do the whole thing. We gotta go on the rides, we gotta get butterbeer, get the outfits, everything! You ready?" she giggled excitedly as he smiled, thinking it was the cutest thing.

"Lead the way,"

"That's what I'm talking about!" she grabbed his hand as they wandered around.

Jungkook had brought a camera with him and had been filming her since their arrival. Smiling as he filmed, he observed as she looked around the area, geeking out. This was so going towards a future GCF for their relationship reveal.

"Ah~! It's just like the movies! I feel like I'm actually in the movies!" she beamed.

After picking up their wands and robes, they check out Three Broomsticks to eat lunch.

"Here we go! Butterbeer! Let's see..." Jennie checked out the options they had.

"Should we get cold or hot butterbeer?" Jungkook pondered.

"Let's get both and try it together,"

After ordering food and two cold and two hot butterbeer beverages, the couple sat together and ate while discussing how much fun they were having so far.

"Okay, the moment of truth. You filming?" she grinned as she watched him with his camera.

"Yes, milady," 

"Okay! Let's see if butterbeer tastes as good as everyone says! I'm going to try the cold one first," she presented the cup and began to take a big sip.

"And the results are...?" he asked with anticipation.

"This SLAPS!" she praised and took another sip, enjoying the delicious taste and cream on top.

After watching her praising the cold drink, Jungkook filmed himself trying the drink and nodded in approval, enjoying it as well. Turning the camera back to her to film, she presented the hot butterbeer next. 

"Okay! Now for the hot one!" she announced and began to take a careful sip. "Oh, I like this, too. Very rich taste. And I feel all warm and cozy. It's warming me up nicely,"

Jungkook filmed himself trying the hot one and enjoyed the taste as well but not as much as the cold one.

"It's good. But I like the cold one, more," he said, still enjoying the hot drink as he took more sips.

"It's hard to choose. I like the hot version just a little bit more. Both are amazing. Well, butterbeer is worth the hype. I'm glad we finally tried it!"

The rest of the day was spent all over Harry Potter world, enjoying the rides and shopping in the stores. They even got to check out some other areas of Universal while taking lots of photos. After a fun filled day, the couple began to leave the park and Jungkook gave her his jacket to wear so she wouldn't be too cold.

"Enjoyed yourself?" He asked.

Enjoying the warmth of his jacket while holding his hand, she said, "One of the best birthdays ever! We gotta go back again, soon. Thanks for today. I had an amazing time,"

"I'm glad you did. Now, onto your next surprise," 

"Wait, there's more?"

-------

Making it back to the hotel, Jungkook guided Jennie back to her room, having her close her eyes as she walked in.

"And...open," he smiled after closing the door behind him.

Once she opened her eyes, she looked around in shock.

"No way!" she grinned and walked around. 

A large happy birthday banner was on display, tons of gifts were placed in the living room area and even cute balloons and decorations were scattered all around the room.

"Jungkook...this is incredible!"

"You deserve it," he grinned. "Jimin and Taehyung helped out,"

"They're the best. You're the best. Everyone is the best. This is too sweet, what?" 

"I'm glad you like everything. And...these are for you," he presented her with a vase full of a dozen red roses and she placed a hand over her chest, appreciative of the gesture.

"Aw...thank you!" she gave him a big kiss and set the vase down on the dining room table. "Wow...these are gorgeous! And they smell great!"

"Nike sent you something as well," he pointed to the living room couch as he made his way over.

"What!? A whole custom birthday box from Nike? What!? Oh, I am about to lose my mind!" she shouted happily and ran over to the large Orange box, sitting on the couch with him.

It held a card wishing her a happy birthday and that they were excited about her working with them. When she opened the box, there were tons of Nike goods in her size and custom made items just for her which made her heart soar.

"Wow...I sound like a broken record but...I...I feel so loved. And I'm so grateful to have you and everyone else in my life. Like really...thank you for always showing me how special I am," she said and kissed him again.

"Always. You mean a lot to me and you deserve all of this and more,"

"Kook...you mean a lot to me, too," 

After the two checked out everything from the Nike box, Jungkook spoke, "I made something for you,"

"Oh? What is it?" she looked on in anticipation.

"Close your eyes, first,"

"Okay," she closed her eyes with a smile, awaiting the surprise.

Getting up from the couch, Jungkook made his way to the fridge to grab the small red velvet cake that he had made for her. Despite the constant teasing from Jimin and Taehyung on whether he knew what he was doing, the cake turned out quite well and was decorated nicely with the icing. After grabbing a few paper plates, plastic forks, and a plastic knife, Jungkook set everything down on the coffee table in front of the couch as Jennie continued to wait patiently.

He placed a 1 candle and a 9 candle on the cutely decorated cake and presented it to her with a smile.

"Open," he softly said.

Opening her eyes, she looked at the cake in surprise, covering her mouth. She glanced up at him, back at the cake, and then back at him, uncovering her mouth to reveal a grin.

"What? You baked for me?"

"You bake for everyone. I wanted this birthday to be memorable so I decided to try to make you something,"

"Jungkook, today has been way more than memorable. This is so sweet, thank you. It smells so good. And it looks good, too,"

"I hope you like it. But before digging in..." he lit the candles and then began to sing Happy Birthday angelically which made her heart leap.

"Make a wish," he happily said. 

After a moment of thinking of a wish, she blew out the candles and they both cheered.

"Let's try the cake together," she requested.

Once Jungkook cut a big slice and put it on a paper plate to share, he placed it on the table. The two picked up a forkful and decided to feed each other. Jennie expected Jungkook's cake to taste delicious and she was correct, enjoying every bite as they continued to feed each other.

"How do you like it? I think it's pretty good," he said.

"You've outdone yourself, this tastes great!" she complimented.

"Better than you?" he teased in a hopeful voice.

"Alright now," she deadpanned before breaking out into giggles with him. 

After finishing the slice, Jungkook put the rest of the cake in the fridge.

"Ah, I'm so spoiled. Today has been magical! Like, look at this! I don't even know where to continue for the gifts," she said, looking at all the gifts scattered around from friends and family.

"Do you want to open your gifts now or see your last gift of the evening?"

"Last gift?" she looked at him curiously.

He smiled softly and nodded. 

The curiosity took over her. "Show me the last gift,"

"Follow me," he grabbed her hand and led her to the bedroom door.

Once he opened it, they walked in and saw that the room was decorated romantically. Cute electric candles lit up the dark room along with rose petals scattered around the floor and bed.

She gasped lightly as her heart fluttered. "Jungkook..."

After closing the door, he watched as she stood in front of him, looking around in awe. Slowly walking over to her from behind, he saw her turn around. No words needed to be said at the moment as they smiled at each other. They both knew they wanted this and felt secure in their feelings.

He gazed at her lovingly as he reached out to pull her into his arms, leaning down to capture her lips tenderly. She held onto him as they kissed and their stomachs leaped with joy and anticipation of what was about to happen. Pulling away she smiled and grabbed his hands, walking back until she was closer to the bed. Turning him around, she made him sit on the edge of the bed as the butterflies increased in her stomach. Straddling him, she wrapped her arms around his neck while feeling his hands rest on her hips.

'Wow...we're really about to do this,' she thought as she held his gaze.

"Nervous?" he asked softly.

"A little," she admitted.

"I'm nervous too but whatever we do it'll feel right," he responded while she ran a hand through his soft hair and cupped his cheek. "We have all night and I plan to take advantage of it. We'll go slow, okay?" 

"Okay," she smiled and explored his mouth again, tasting the red velvet cake from his lips.

Once she pulled away, he guided her soft hands to his firm chest and she slowly began to undo the buttons of his dress shirt. Unbuttoning the last button, she took it off him eagerly and got a good look at his toned torso, admiring the view which did not go unnoticed by him. She kissed him again, having her hands all over his body as the warmth of his skin radiated onto her. Jungkook smiled into the kiss, loving how her hands roamed, making him feel satisfied with his body. He had been getting slightly bigger in muscle and had been working out even more these days. 

She didn't know how much time had passed as she kept touching and kissing him but she loved how patient he was. He didn't rush her. He let her set the pace and let her do whatever she wanted.

As her soft, full lips trailed down to his chin and his neck, she began to slowly grind into him, making him groan softly which caused her stomach to leap at the pleasant sound. The grip on her hips tightened as he moved with her to create more friction. He sighed out her name when she nipped softly on his neck. Trailing kisses up his neck and capturing his lips again, she could feel him through his jeans as he pushed his hips into hers again, making her moan softly.

She felt his warm hands on her waist as he met her eyes, asking if it was OK to continue. Once she nodded, she felt her sweatshirt ride up and helped him take it off, tossing it on the floor. Jungkook swallowed hard, looking at her chest with desire as it was covered in a red bra.

"You can touch me, you know," she reminded with a smile and grabbed his hands, guiding them to her chest.

"I-I know...just...wow..." he said breathlessly.

He was in a trance and felt himself getting harder, enjoying the view up close like this. She sighed into his touch when he squeezed lightly and had his lips travel around her neck.

"You are so beautiful..." he murmured against her skin while his hands caressed her, making her squirm and whimper softly.

He was pleased to hear the sounds coming from her as she moved her neck to give him better access, feeling his sweet kisses all over. Suddenly, he easily stood up with her legs wrapped around his waist. Spinning around a little, she giggled, making him smile and capture her lips as she cupped his cheeks. Not breaking the kiss, he gently laid her down on the bed, crawling on top of her as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

Everything he was doing to her so far made her body feel warm all over as her heart pounded. The way he kissed her and continued to caress her body had her intoxicated by his touch. As they both sat up a little, Jungkook glanced at her to see if she was ready to continue and she nodded. Reaching out to the back of her bra, he attempted to unclasp it but began to struggle. The sight made Jen look amused as she thought it was cute how concentrated yet confused he was at trying to do such a simple task.

"Need help?" she teased.

"I got this," he said but continued to struggle.

As she watched him fumble with the bra, a giggle escaped her lips, making his ears twitch and glance back up at her.

"Are you laughing at me?" he chuckled.

"A little~. Here, let me help," she helped him unclasp it and take it off as she tossed it somewhere on the floor.

"Wow..." he breathed, drinking her in.

He gently laid her down and grabbed her right breast in his palm. Feeling him place kisses over her chest, she let out soft moans and writhed under his touch while he gave her left breast attention. While he sucked and swirled his tongue around her hard left nipple, her back arched as a wave of heat surged down between her legs. This felt too good as she continued to let out sounds of pleasure, enjoying what his mouth was doing. As he brushed her right nipple with his thumb, he continued to suck and nip on her left one, before moving over to give her right breast the same attention.

"Can I?" he breathed as his hands moved down to the button of her jeans.

"Yes," she breathed with want.

Unbuttoning her jeans and zipping down the fly, he helped her out of them, along with her red underwear, and tossed them off the bed. Moving back up, he kissed her again passionately. She then began to whimper against his mouth and squirmed when she felt one of his hands traveling down to her thigh. 

"Still sensitive here, I see," he murmured, pleased to have remembered one of her sensitive spots.

He kissed her hungrily as his hand traveled down to rub against her core, causing her to moan loudly into his mouth and hold onto him. 

"Jungkook..." she gasped.

Proud to feel her getting so wet for him and being so responsive to his touch, he kissed up her neck and whispered in her ear, "I'm right here,"

They've been here before. They have done this a handful of times since Prom Weekend and each time felt amazing as he knew how to make her feel good with his hands and tongue. 

As he kissed every inch of her body, being vocal about how beautiful she was and how beautiful her black skin was which continued to make her dizzy, Jungkook began to kiss down her body. While he kissed down her stomach, she let out a gasp and began breathing heavily once his lips kissed around her hips and inner thighs. Finally, he was face to face with her entrance. He was pleased to see how wet she had become and it was all for him as she was anticipating what he would do next.

His mouth got to work, kissing her thighs and landing right to her core as her heavy pants were heard throughout the bedroom, which was music to his ears. Jungkook felt her grip fistfuls of his silky hair as he swirled his tongue around her folds, starting at a slow pace since he wanted to take his time to enjoy her. His tongue felt warm and soft against her as he licked his way up to her clit.

"Ah, Jungkook!" she cried out as her hips jolted at the sudden sensation.

As he continued, picking up the pace to lick and suck her clit, he felt her remove her hands from his hair and try to move away because the pleasure was beginning to make her feel like she wouldn't be able to handle it. However, Jungkook was having none of it and pulled her back to his mouth and kept her firmly in place, digging right back in.

"I-I can't—fuck!" she moaned, squeezing her eyes shut as she threw her head back into the soft mattress. 

She wasn't going to be able to take much more of this as she felt vibrations against her from his chuckle, sending shivers up her spine. Meanwhile, Jungkook looked up with lustful eyes, enjoying the view of her looking disheveled with her mouth open.

"Yes, you can," he encouraged. "You're taking it so well like you always do,"

He felt a sense of pride. No one else was able to make her feel the way he made her feel. And he enjoyed the fact that he caused this reaction from her and only him. He continued to devour her, paying attention to her cries of pleasure. Instantly after that, her entire body tensed up as she shuddered and cried out his name. Smiling to himself, he kept his head buried between her thighs as his mouth was slick with saliva and her juices. Pulling away, with his mouth glistening, he licked his lips.

"You all right?" he asked with a soft smirk, feeling a bit smug that he left her in shambles.

As she steadied her breathing, she finally was able to speak, "Hm-hm...it's like...every time you do this you get better,"

He smiled at her praise. "The motivation is you,"

She smiled at his reply. They truly loved each other. And now they were expressing it on a whole new level. She felt so safe with him and felt amazing so far. Deep in her thoughts, her eyes began to roam down to his physique, admiring the view. Those arms...those thighs...everything. He looked beautiful and she felt so lucky to call him hers. 

"Normally, I'm the one caught in a trance. Like what you see?" he raised a brow in a teasing manner, making her look back up at his doe eyes.

She giggled. "Caught red-handed,"

Reaching out for him, she pulled him to hover over her as she crashed her lips against his.

"Are you okay to continue or do you need a break?" he murmured against her lips.

"I can continue," she replied, helping him take his jeans off.

As he tossed the jeans off the bed, Jennie noticed the bulge in his underwear and reached out, wanting to pleasure him but he gently stopped her. 

"I want to focus on you, tonight," he said softly. "Another time, okay? Let me take care of you. I've been dreaming about this moment for a long time...tell me what you want and I'll give it to you. I'll give you anything and everything, Jennie..."

Her heart pounded at his words as she cupped his left cheek, thumb caressing the little scar on his cheek. 

"Jungkook, please...I need you," she begged, making his dick throb while he sweetly kissed her body again. 

It took every ounce of strength from him to not let her wish be granted just yet. He still wanted to make sure she was well prepared for him.

"I know...I know...just a little longer," he murmured against her skin. "I love you like this...I love your beautiful skin...your lips...your shoulders...your arms...your hands..." 

As he called out each body part, he moved to kiss them as he continued to take his time with the foreplay which began to drive her crazy with her need for him increasing tenfold. He kissed every inch of her body once again and made mental notes of all her sweet spots. Even though he also had lube to assist, he meant what he said when he wanted to take his time and make her feel beautiful as he whispered sweet nothings to her.

When he finally felt like she was ready, he slipped out of his boxers and she finally got a look at all of him as she laid on her back. From his broad shoulders, strong arms, and thick thighs, to his hard length slick from anticipation, she loved everything about him as she bit her bottom lip softly, enjoying the view. He was so captivatingly handsome and no longer the little boy she met at Big Hit when they were younger. He was a man whom she fell in love with and is proud to call hers. A man who has made her feel desired and gorgeous all night. A man who she's giving herself to.

A man she loves deeply.

Watching him put a condom on along with putting a generous amount of lube, her stomach flipped with anticipation. Lining himself up at her entrance, he met her gaze and they both smiled.

"You ready?" he breathed.

"Yes. I love you," 

"I love you, too," he immediately replied.

He hovered over her and gave her a deep, passionate kiss as he pushed his tip in slowly and entered her. As she felt him push all the way in, she moaned into his mouth and held onto him tightly. The stretch felt good and it didn't hurt as much as she anticipated. Honestly, the way he prepared her was a great thing as she felt more pleasure all around.

"Fuck...you feel amazing," he groaned.

He felt like he was in heaven at how good she felt around him while his head was on the crook of her neck. He kept himself still for a moment to allow them both to adjust to this new feeling as he breathed heavily with her. It felt like a big stretch and she felt full. But damn did he feel good and he didn't even move yet.

"Are you ok?" he whispered.

"Hm hm," she breathed.

"Let me know when to move. I'll try not to cum too quick...you feel so good," he sounded a bit strained as he tried to control himself. 

They remained still for a while and Jungkook lifted his head to take a good look at her with love in his eyes. This was another sight he'd never get tired of and wanted to experience over and over again with her under him like this. 

She reached out and cupped his cheek. "You can move,"

"Okay. I'll go slow,"

Their bodies pressed together heatedly with Jungkook slowly thrusting into her with ease as he grunted along with her gasps and whimpers. It felt so good. Better than she ever imagined. 

So this was how it felt to be intimate with someone you love. She felt euphoric.

He kept the pace slow, careful not to hurt her, and found a sensual rhythm after a few thrusts. Picking up his head, he watched her with adoration while maintaining eye contact with her.

"I love you so much...you feel so good. Better than I ever imagined..." he moaned.

He noticed she was trying not to be loud and was keeping a lot of sounds to herself. But he wanted to encourage her to break out of that and it was all for his ears only. He kissed her sloppily and pressed his body against hers again with his head on the crook of her neck.

Grunting in her ear, he spoke, "It's okay, Jennie. Let it out. It's just us. I want to hear you,"

He began to pick up the pace a little, causing her to cry out and lightly scratch his back. She held onto him tight as her panting and moans increased in volume. When he heard her beginning to moan out his name, he smiled to himself.

"That's it...good girl," he praised with a huff. 

She involuntarily clenched around him, causing him to moan. That nickname was going to be dangerous in the future she could already tell from the way she reacted positively every time he called her that. Because of her sudden reaction to it, his confidence continued to boost.

Grabbing her hands, he pinned them to the bed on each side of her head and intertwined his fingers with hers as he continued to thrust into her.

Feeling her release, Jennie cried out his name with her body stuttering. As she rode out her high, Jungkook soon followed as he groaned out her name. His body shook violently as he filled up the condom and collapsed on top of her, panting heavily.

He rolled off of her, removed the condom, and placed it in the wastebasket next to the bed. Immediately he pulled her into his arms and held her as they came down from their high.

"Wow..." he sighed deeply with a big smile.

She giggled and looked up at him.

"Wow..." she replied breathlessly.

Wow...they just took the next step in their relationship and it was something they were always going to remember. Jennie had a dull ache between her thighs but she felt amazing. She felt treasured and she felt important. He took his time with her and made her feel beautiful. They both were sweaty from their physical activities and tangled in the sheets as they smooched again, soaking in the euphoria. 

"Are you all right?" Jungkook asked in a gentle voice with a smile as she looked at him.

He admired the afterglow on her face as he thought she was the most beautiful person he ever laid eyes on.

She cupped the side of his face and beamed. "I feel amazing. Thank you."

"I'm glad you do. Did I do ok?" he hoped as she moved strands of hair sticking on his forehead.

"Of course. It was everything I wanted and more,"

"Good. I'm glad. Does anything hurt?"

"Not really. You prepared me, well. And the lube was a bonus, too. A few friends of mine told me how it hurt them for their first time so I was trying to mentally prepare for the pain but...with you, I was in bliss,"

He smiled at that as his heart pounded. "I was in bliss with you, too,"

Jennie truly was in a state of utter bliss, right now. She felt so good and relaxed. Jungkook had been so loving and attentive for their first time.

"Honestly, I love it when you praise me, in bed. And I really love the things you do to me...how you make me feel. Physically and emotionally,"

She could sense his confidence boosting even more from her compliment as a big grin came across his face. 

"That makes me very happy. So, I can keep calling you my good girl in bed?"

She giggled. "Yes. It makes me feel good and makes me feel like I'm doing a good job,"

"You're always doing a good job. You have nothing to worry about when it comes to us. I like it when you're vocal and the way you hold onto me. Don't be timid about it, okay?"

"Okay, I'll do my best,"

"We need to work on you not running from me when I'm trying to give you head," he teased.

"I...listen...it's..." she couldn't find the right words as he laughed, making her chuckle. "You do it so right, I can get overwhelmed with the pleasure. I didn't think I was going to be able to handle it,"

"You handled yourself, well. And you'll continue to. Also, I think you scratched my back a little,"

"Oh gosh, I'm sorry. I hope it's not too bad,"

"I liked the feeling, it's okay. It did have me thinking about the future. If I'm able to get this reaction out of you now then...what about the other things I want to try with you because there are a lot of things I want to try...a lot,"

She felt her stomach flip at the way his gaze intensified when he said that. "Me too. I kind of...want to see how it is in front of a mirror, one day,"

"Thinking ahead, too, huh?" he smirked softly at the thought. "I'm curious, as well,"

She decided to lay on her back, looking at the ceiling while he chose to lay on his side and propped his head in his hand as he watched her.

"Wow...I remember when I first saw you..." she said with a smile as he listened attentively. "I walked past you a few times when I was still training. You didn't notice me but I'd see you from time to time at Big Hit. You were so focused on your training. And it was always a treat to catch a glimpse of your smile. I always loved seeing you smile. I was closer with Tae at the time since he was the only BTS member I knew but he'd talk about you and the rest of the members and I was just praying...just hoping that I'd get chosen as Miss Bangtan when I auditioned,"

"And here we are," he spoke up.

Turning her head to him, she chuckled. "And here we are. Over the years...being your best friend and learning and growing up with you have been some of the best moments of my life. And being here in this moment with you...being your girlfriend...is when I'm the happiest,"

Jungkook's eyes softened as he listened to her. "And I'm the happiest with you. Always. You taught me a lot of things and you're still teaching me. You taught me how to love. And how to express myself,"

She smiled at that. "I'm glad. Thank you. I'm happy you made me wait. This was perfect. Wow..."

Jungkook watched her with heart eyes as she rambled. He couldn't help himself and blurted his thoughts out loud, "You're so beautiful,"

Hearing him say that caused her to stop talking, feeling flushed at the sudden compliment. She giggled as he looked at her lovingly. Hiding her face in his chest made him chuckle as his heart leaped.

"I'm serious, Jennie. I'm happy. I'm happy to be here with you in this moment,"

Looking up at him, she responded, "Keep it up and you're gonna make me fall in love with you harder,"

He grinned and leaned down to kiss her, wrapping an arm around her. Jennie was already down bad. She couldn't get enough of him and didn't want this to end. She wanted to stay here forever if she could.

As they cuddled and rested in bed in a comfortable silence, Jennie spoke, "What are you thinking about, Jungkook?"

"What you said earlier. I remember my first thoughts when I first laid eyes on you at Big Hit," he brought up as his fingers began to trace over her curves. "I caught a few glimpses of you during the trainee days. Before we officially met when you were declared Miss Bangtan. I always thought you were so pretty. Me and my shyness prevented me from trying to approach you to say hi but whenever I saw you train, I'd stop for a moment to watch you work. You worked so hard and there was a unique fire in you that made you stand out from the other girls. And I had hoped you'd be the one to become Miss Bangtan,"

"And here we are,"

He chuckled at her response since he had said that earlier. "Here we are. I was so happy. And then I got to know you and asked you to be my Golden Best Friend. We confirmed it with friendship rings and did everything together. And I couldn't help but start to fall in love with you and that scared me because I didn't want to ruin our friendship. But as we got older and I finally had that confidence to tell you how I felt...it became one of the best decisions I have ever made in my life. I'm really happy that you're mine,"

"Jungkook..." she cupped his face and smiled. "I'm really happy that you're mine, too. We'll be together for a year in a few months. Time flew, huh?"

"Yeah, it did. Wow...a year already?"

"Seems like just yesterday I told you I loved you, too in your room. And since then, every day has been an adventure,"

"A fun one at that. I just want to be the best boyfriend, ever. Your first and last,"

"You will be my first, last, and always," she said as he played with her hand and intertwined his fingers with hers.

"Are you ready for our reveal?" he asked, since later this year they'll be revealing their relationship to the public.

"Yeah. I am. I'm going to miss this. Miss the privacy and everyone not knowing anything but I know Dispatch knows we're dating. But at least we can beat them to it and say our truth. I'm mentally prepared for it. I know you'll be by my side through it all. I have nothing to worry about when I'm with you,"

"I'm happy you know that. We'll be fine. Just like what I told you when I confessed. I meant every word. No one is going to take you away from me so easily. I'll stand next to you through it all,"

Time passed as they continued to be in each other's arms to talk. Angelina was right, pillow talk was definitely the best.

While Jungkook listened to her talk, he thought about how connected he felt with her after everything. He was never going to let her go. Not after all this. Jennie noticed his expression change which caused her to stop talking. The way he stared deeply into her eyes with deep longing made her stomach flip.

"A-are you okay?" she asked.

"Yeah...I just can't get enough of you," he leaned down to start kissing her lips again, slowly turning them over as he hovered over her.

She gasped and held onto him when she felt him grind into her.

"A-again?" she asked keenly, melting into his touch as his hands roamed over her body.

"Again. I'm not done," he responded as she giggled. 

Jennie was happy that they were on the same page with this. She wanted to ask to go again and wondered how to bring it up. His dick felt nice and introduced her to a whole world of pleasure and she couldn't wait to try different positions. Also, who knows when they will have alone time like this, again? Especially for the whole day. So they should take advantage of this moment.

Jungkook wasn't expecting himself to be hard again so suddenly but this was Jennie who he had in his arms. Who he kissed over and over again and made love to. Who he had longed for since he could remember. He wanted to do everything with her and his desires began to take over.

"Are you still flexible?" he suddenly asked.

Flexible? Just what did he have in mind? The question weighed in her mind as she thought of how she should answer.

Feeling playful, she replied in a teasing manner, as her hand went down to his hard length, "Hm...why don't you find out?" 

Groaning from her touch, Jungkook's ears perked up when she asked that enticing question.

Was that...a challenge?

"Challenge accepted," he said huskily in her ear, making her shiver.

It didn't take long for them both to be ready for the next round as he went to grab another condom to put on. On his knees, he heard her let out a surprised yelp when he quickly grabbed her ankles and swiftly pulled her to him as his pupils dilated.

"I always wanted to do this to you," he grabbed her legs and placed them over his shoulders.

He kissed her right ankle softly and looked down at her while placing a warm and firm grip on her hips. She felt even more vulnerable and excited to be in this new position as she tried to prepare for what was about to happen.

"Just tell me if it's too much or if this hurts, okay? I'll go slow, first," he reassured.

Once she confirmed that she would do as she was told, Jennie cried out when he pushed in and began to move at a slow pace to get her used to the new position. Now this position felt even deeper and had her louder as she gripped the sheets and let out a series of curses from how good it felt. Pants left Jungkook's lips as he kept his eyes locked on her while Jennie's eyes were closed, overwhelmed with pleasure.

"Look at me," he demanded.

Managing to open them to meet his ardent gaze, short, ragged gasps left her.

"W-wait—Oh my God!" she cried when he began to pick up the pace, leaning forward, bringing her knees to her chest as he placed his palms on the mattress, on either side of her head.

She tried to grab onto anything she could. The sheets, his torso, his hair, anything as she kept her eyes on him, watching his face contort in pleasure. His eyes were as dangerous as that sultry stare he kept on her and he was using all of it to his advantage to make her tremble underneath him. When she told him to find out if she was still flexible, she wasn't expecting him to bend her this early on as his hips snapped faster.

Her release hit her in waves as she screamed with her body shaking. With one last powerful thrust, his body twitched and he released into the condom. Both were shaking and breathing heavily as they stayed in the position with him looking down, enthralled by her.

"Shit...Where did you learn that!?" she exclaimed, catching her breath, feeling the after effects of her high.

He chuckled and leaned down to lock lips with hers as his tongue brushed against hers. Pulling away, he smiled. "Ah...I hope you won't get mad but I've been asking Namjoon Hyung for some advice,"

"Me? Mad? After what you just did to me, are you crazy? I need to thank him,"

He laughed as she giggled.

Jungkook felt like Namjoon was the best to have serious discussions on topics regarding taking that next step in the relationship. He loved all his hyungs and trusted them. And with Namjoon, he felt like he could confide in him the best about being an attentive boyfriend in the bedroom. And overall, the best to go to for any advice. He was a great leader and a great friend.

"I am not complaining whatsoever...oh my God..." she sighed deeply. "That was amazing,"

As they continued to catch their breath, Jungkook hadn't pulled out yet.

"Just let me...let me stay inside you just a little longer. You feel too good," he told her as she enjoyed the sensation.

He relished the feeling of being inside her. The warmth of her around him. He was happy to be vulnerable with her and be able to express himself like this. After a while, he slowly pulled out of her to remove the condom and throw it in the trash.

"Stay right there, I'll be back," he said and got out of bed.

Turning on her side to watch him, she spoke, "Nice butt,"

He chuckled and raised an eyebrow suggestively at her before leaving the room. Moments later, he came back with two bottles of water and a wet washcloth. Handing her a bottle while setting the other on the nightstand, he got back in bed.

"Thank you," she smiled and opened it to gulp some water. 

The cool drink quenched her dry throat and she was grateful. Especially due to the amount of yelling and screaming she had been doing because of him.

"Let me clean you up a bit," he said and used the washcloth to gently wipe her down. 

They both were sweaty and spent from their activities as sleep was heavy on their minds. After he wiped her down nicely, he turned off all the electric candles in the room and got under the covers with her. Pulling her into his arms, she laid on his chest with her chest flushed against his as he put the covers over them. 

"You all right?" he asked, sleepily.

"Hm-hm...I love you..." she murmured sleepily as she snuggled into his chest.

"I love you, too," he kissed the top of her head and closed his eyes.

----------

In the morning, the bedroom was brightened with the sun peeking out. Still under the sheets and lying on her own side of the comfortable bed instead of on top of Jungkook, Jennie began to stir in her slumber.

Opening her eyes, she stretched and laid on her back. Her body felt a little sore from last night's physical activities and her face flushed, remembering what had happened. A smile tugged on her mouth as she thought about how good Jungkook made her feel. Was this what it was like to be with someone you truly love? She felt like she was on a high. Warm and fuzzy feelings filled her heart as she was elated.

Turning around, she was greeted by the beautiful view of a naked Jungkook still sleeping. His hair was messy and the bed sheet was covering his lower body, showing off his toned chest and abs. His face exuded calmness as she watched him with a smile and looked at him with a deeper love. After last night, their love for each other amplified and they were even more affirmed in their feelings.

She kissed his nose and turned her back to him to grab her phone off the nightstand. She focused on answering birthday messages from yesterday and thanked friends, family, and fans for all the love. 

Feeling the bed move, she set her phone down on the mattress and felt Jungkook wrap an arm around her, pulling her to his firm chest.

"Mm...good morning," he greeted in her ear, making her shiver.

Oh...his morning voice was a whole new level of sexy. His voice was rough and deeper and she even heard a bit of his Busan Satoori accent. 

Before she could speak, he gently moved her onto her stomach and began to place soft, sensual kisses on her shoulder and down her back, making her breath hitch. His lips traveled down her spine as she trembled and he found himself going lower.

"Ah! Stop!" she laughed and squirmed when he went to gently bite her left ass cheek, feeling playful this morning.

She felt him chuckle against her body as he kissed back up her spine with his length hardened. Pulling her back against his chest, as they began to lay on their sides, she looked back and crashed her lips against his deeply.

The both of them were all over each other, unable to get enough as they kissed and touched each other like they did the night before. Both ready for round 3, Jungkook slipped on another condom as they laid on their sides, spooning. Sliding in smoothly, she gasped as he held her close, with her leg over his, thrusting in and out at a luscious pace while she pushed back with each thrust. 

They can get used to this. Being able to love each other this much without any interruptions. Their moans and heavy breathing filled the room as they made love once again. After they came down from their sweet release, with Jungkook pulling out and throwing the condom away, Jennie snuggled into his arms.

"Good morning. Can't keep your hands off me, huh?" she giggled after kissing him tenderly.

"Not after last night. And I just wanted to make sure I wasn't dreaming that last night happened. I'm happy this is real. How are you feeling?"

"Me too. I feel good. Just a little sore but I'm fine,"

"Did I do too much?"

"No, you're fine, Kook. You made me feel special," she answered while he kissed her temple.

They stayed in bed for another hour, enjoying each other's company, and proceeded to get ready for the day. Jennie put her hair in a high bun and planned her outfit for the day, setting it out on the dresser of the bedroom. Putting on her shower playlist to play on a small speaker in the bathroom, the two began to shower together. This was a whole new level of intimacy as they smiled at each other and reminisced on last night.

They showered but before they could turn off the water, the two found themselves all over each other once again. This time it was Jennie who had initiated it, pulling him to her wet body as the warm water rushed down Jungkook's back. Her heavy breathing and moans mixed with the running water as she writhed under his touch.

"You want to do this in the shower?" he grunted against her ear as her hands released his length.

"Wait...condoms. We don't have any," 

"We do. I put one condom and a specific type of lube that'll work in the shower for it. Right here," he pointed to one of the shelves of the shower.

As he said, there was a packaged condom and lube to assist with the shower. She was surprised. He really thought of everything.

"Wow, you really had this all planned out for me, huh?" 

"Just in case," he grinned sheepishly. "There are a lot of places I imagined us in...this is one of them. So, we could try it here. See if we like it, if you're up for it. I don't want to overdo it or anything if you're tired,"

"Overdo it? Nah, come here. I'm never going to get enough of you. I can handle another round," she pulled him back, backing up against the cold tile which made her shiver slightly.

He smirked. "Your wish is my command. I'm never going to get enough of you, either,"

As they kissed repeatedly, the shower water ran down his back while they were all over each other. They didn't know how much time had passed as they explored their bodies in this new environment for lovemaking but all that was on their minds was each other. After grabbing the condom to put it on himself, he used a generous amount of lube.

"Hold onto me," he instructed after lifting her to hold her securely in his arms while she was pressed against the shower wall.

He slid right in, slow and sensual as they both gasped at the feeling. The two became lost in each other once again as Jungkook began to move at an agonizingly slow pace, to try to tease her. It began to work as she whined and held onto him tighter.

"Faster..." she murmured in his ear while his face was buried in the crook of her neck.

He heard her and chuckled as she felt the vibration against her wet body. He knew what she wanted but wanted to hear her say it louder.

"Speak up, Jennie. What do you want?"

Oh, this little shit...How could he have the strength to tease her like this? This wasn't fair.

Unable to handle the slow pace, she finally relented as she let out another curse and spoke up as requested as she begged, "Please...go faster!"

Giving her what she wanted, he immediately picked up the pace, making her cry out and hold onto him tighter. Moving his head he smooched her sloppily as she moaned and whimpered against his mouth. There was no way she was going to be able to survive this with the way he snapped his hips against hers. God...her head was spinning with the way he had her yelling out for him. She knew for a fact her legs were going to feel like jelly after this with the way he was making her feel. He felt so good and felt better every time they were intimate. 

She moaned his name loudly and clenched around him as she had her release. His hips snapped into her faster with his movements getting sloppier, groaning out her name as he followed her, both riding out their high together.

Still catching their breaths, they looked at each other with satisfied smiles and kissed again as he remained inside her, enjoying the feeling. After their shower, Jennie's legs felt weak and she almost fell until he caught her.

"Easy," he soothed. "You all right?"

"I am but my legs feel like jelly," she admitted.

"Yeah...I overdid it," he chuckled.

"And it was so worth it," she responded tiredly with a chuckle.

Turning off the shower, and grabbing a towel, he wrapped it around her body and carried her bridal style out of the shower. Gently laying her on her bed, he went back to the bathroom to dry off and wrap a towel around himself, walking back in the bedroom.

"I'll take care of you. Relax. I'm going to lotion you up and help put on your outfit. Then you'll rest up, all right?"

"Mm-hm," she responded tiredly again.

Her body was spent.

To pamper her like this even though her birthday was over was sweet. He lotioned her body and even massaged her while he did it to help with the soreness. Especially for her legs. He then helped her put on her sports bra, sweatpants, and a hoodie. After she was squared away, she immediately fell asleep as he chuckled at the cute sight. Readjusting her on the bed, he gently placed a pillow under her and placed the covers over her.

Kissing her cheek, he watched her sleep, feeling satisfied. He made love to her how many times, now? Made her say his name with ecstasy in her voice, how many times? She was his and he was hers. They were 100% locked in.

After she was taken care of, he grabbed his bag to put on his new outfit for the day, consisting of a similar outfit of a hoodie and sweatpants. He then gathered their scattered clothes from last night and straightened up the bedroom.

Gently closing the bedroom door, he let her sleep. While he waited for her to wake up, he brought his Wii U and played it in the living room. After an hour passed his phone buzzed on the coffee table and he saw Namjoon calling.

"Morning, hyung," Jungkook greeted happily.

"Good morning. Are you two getting ready for breakfast?" he asked.

Breakfast?? Jungkook had forgotten that the group planned to go out to eat for breakfast. But he planned to make Jennie breakfast.

Jungkook rubbed the back of his neck as he got up to check on Jennie still sleeping and went back to the couch. "You mind if we both do a rain check? We'll be ready for dinner, later. She's still sleeping and I plan to make her breakfast in her room,"

Namjoon laughed at his response, having an understanding of what was up while Jungkook began to blush.

"Ah...Hyung, can you keep this between us?"

"Of course. I'm happy you two are happy and affirming your love for each other,"

"Thank you,"

"Is that Jungkook? Are they getting ready?" Jin asked in the background.

"It's him. They're going to eat breakfast together. They won't be joining us," Namjoon informed.

"What!? I wanted to see Jennie and spend more time with her after he hogged her all day,"

"We ate breakfast with her yesterday,"

"And I'd like to spend more time with my daughter, thank you,"

"Our daughter,"

Jungkook laughed at their banter and ignored Jin's complaining as he hung up the phone. He proceeded to make Jennie a Japanese breakfast. He planned out making her breakfast a few days before her birthday and went grocery shopping in advance. Once he finished making everything for them both, he set the dishes up on the coffee table while the TV was showing the news and how the weather was going to be today. 

Heading into her room to see her awake and scrolling her phone, he smiled. 

"Hey," he greeted softly.

Her face lit up when she turned to see him. "Hi...something smells good," 

She sat up and stretched, feeling refreshed as the soreness had felt more dull now and her legs didn't feel as weak as before. 

"Call it brunch. It's waiting for us," he proudly announced. 

"Brunch with you? How cute. What time is it?"

"It's past 1 now,"

"There is no way," she looked at the clock on her phone.

She was so fixated on continuing to reply to birthday messages and seeing the nice tweets from ARMY that she failed to acknowledge the time. It was truly past 1 pm.

"Jungkook!? Why didn't you wake me earlier? We were going to hang with Jimin and Tae, I just remembered,"

"Trust me, you needed the rest after what I did to you these past 24 hours," he reminded, causing her face to flush. "And it's a good thing we don't have a schedule today and you get to rest. So, it all worked out," 

"Okay, you got me there," she chuckled with him.

Reaching out to gently grab her, he easily lifted her in his arms to carry her to the living room and sat her down on the couch where their food was waiting for them.

"I already let them know we'll hang out with them, later. They're still here at the hotel. We'll meet them when ready," 

"Okay, cool. Wow, this looks delicious. Spoiling me, still?"

"Always. Let's eat,"

She took a bite of her steamed rice and praised him for his cooking as he felt great about himself. He loved hearing her praise him and thank him for the little things. Jennie was always vocal about the things he did for her and he appreciated that. 

As they ate, Jennie found a channel that showed a familiar anime that she remembered Taehyung mentioning. The two chatted about what they planned to do for the rest of the day and as they ate with Jungkook focused on the TV, she observed him in contentment.

So valued...so secure...she wanted this relationship to last forever. She truly believed she found the one. A walking green flag, he is. Someone so open and patient in loving her. Someone who truly sees her and is not afraid to love her, even in public. 

"What?" he grinned, sensing her looking at his face as he got lost in her eyes. 

"I love you, Jungkook," she said with a smile.

His bunny smile got wider as he leaned over to kiss her deeply. "I love you, too,"

After eating breakfast together, Jennie continued to open up her gifts and made sure to send texts and tweets to shout out everyone who had gifted her something. The two lovers continued to get ready for the day and made sure to cover up any marks from their physical activities since last night with concealer. 

Making sure she had everything, she left her room with Jungkook and placed a white cap on her head. "Okay! Let's meet up with Jimin and Taehyung,"

"Onward!" Jungkook smacked her butt and walked beside her as she giggled.

----------

The couple met up with the other half of the Maknae line so they could do some sightseeing for the day. Meeting them outside, the four of them began walking. Jimin and Taehyung began to notice Jennie and Jungkook acting closer than before and peeped at how Jungkook seemed to act clingier in a way. And there was a sudden glow about Jennie that could not be ignored as she smiled happily. Curiosity popped up between the two as they wondered what happened.

"Ennie! So, how was your birthday? It's been all day and now we see you? Are you all right?" Taehyung asked with a grin.

"Yeah! It was so much fun! We went to Universal and we got to see Harry Potter World! Butterbeer is SO good! And yeah, I'm fine. I was catching up on sleep. I was up all night," 

A low chuckle escaped Jungkook's lips as he thought about the context of her statement and smirked to himself. All the memories of her under him came back as he thought about how crazy they were about each other. Catching the reaction, Jennie locked eyes with her lover and felt her face warm up as she chuckled softly. 

Jimin and Taehyung glanced at each other as they watched closely at the couple's body language and reactions to her statement.

"Jeon Jungkook...Jennifer Walker." Jimin called them out.

"Yeah? What is it?" she asked, reluctantly turning away from Jungkook to look at him.

"What, hyung?" Jungkook asked as his lingering gaze on her stayed. After a moment, he finally turned to Jimin to see what he wanted.

Jimin narrowed his eyes, observing them suspiciously while the couple raised an eyebrow.

"Mm-hm." Jimin nodded to himself and glanced at Taehyung.

"Mm-hm?" Taehyung glanced back and Jimin nodded in response. 

"Mm-hm..." they both said and gave each other knowing looks, chuckling to themselves.

"So, Jennie, was Jungkook golden in lovemaking, too?" Jimin teased with a grin.

Jungkook let out a cough, looking shooked while Jennie widened her eyes and turned away.

"He was! Oh my God! You two finally did it!? It took you both long enough! And why didn't you tell us this, earlier!? Our ship has sailed to NEW heights!" Taehyung cheered.

"Why would we do that!?" Jungkook exclaimed.

Jennie groaned. "This isn't something the whole world should know."

"But we're the Maknae Line! We tell each other everything!" Jimin whined.

"Oh my God..." Jennie sighed.

"Oh my gosh, do your sisters know that their baby sister is-"

"NO!" she cut Jimin off.

"Does Jin know!? His reaction will be priceless!" Taehyung laughed.

"NO! And we'd like to keep it that way!" Jungkook exclaimed.

"So, this is why she was walking a little funny," Jimin laughed loudly while Taehyung giggled.

Jennie pushed her cap down to hide her embarrassment as she looked down. Her face was on fire from their constant teasing while Jungkook went to hit them both.

"Hyung!" Jungkook shouted, face getting pink.

"What? We think it's adorable! If you need any alone time, we can help!"

"Yeah! It's nice to see our Golden Couple so close as of late," Taehyung added with a boxy smile.

"So, Jennie, was Jungkookie manly?" Jimin teased, raising his eyebrows.

"Chill!" Jennie whined, covering her face.

"Let's go!" Jungkook grabbed her hand and walked away while the 95 Liners continued to laugh out loud and ran after them.

--------

Later in the evening, all of Bangtan went out to eat in a private area for dinner to catch up. Jennie sat in between Jungkook and Hobi as they all ate their food happily. Jen settled for ramen and devoured the noodles with delight.

"Well, it's finally good to see you, Jennie. Where have you been all day? We tried to get a hold of you for breakfast but Jungkook said you were still sleeping," Jin brought up. 

"We ate breakfast together," she answered with a smile.

"He hogged you all day yesterday and even all morning. It's good to see you, now," Yoongi added.

"Haha, it's good to see you guys, too! I just had a long night and slept in. But my birthday was fun!" she replied, smiling brightly.

"What did you do? I saw your tweets at Universal! I want to go next time,"

"We all gotta make a trip there, it was a blast! The rides were lit," she enthused as she recapped her time with Jungkook at Universal.

"Butterbeer, huh? I'm curious," Hobi added.

Dinner was filled with good vibes and silliness like always as everyone laughed at whatever jokes were said or silly acts were performed. Amused at Hobi and Taehyung's silliness, Jennie and Jungkook began clapping their hands while laughing, throwing their heads back.

Jimin and Taehyung glanced at each other and grinned. Now they were doing the same mannerisms as each other? This was too cute.

"You two laugh the same!" Taehyung giggled.

"Yeah! And you moved the same!" Jin pointed out.

"Lately it's like you two are starting to act the same, sometimes," Hobi added.

"We are?" the couple asked in unison which caused the guys to chuckle at their point being made.

"Usually Jungkook claps and laughs. Jen, it seems like you picked up on his habit. It's cute," Yoongi observed.

"Really? I didn't even notice," she giggled, glancing at Jungkook with a smile.

After eating, Jennie decided to do some last minute grocery shopping because she wanted to try to make a Japanese cake after coming across so many bakeries in Japan. She wanted to learn more about baking different types of sweets and decided to try to make herself a Japanese Strawberry Shortcake. She had tried one before and loved it and wanted to create her own version.

Wanting to keep her company, the Hyung Line decided to join her while the Maknae Line went to hang out somewhere else. Finding a grocery store that didn't have that many people, they began to shop while wearing their masks.

"What do you plan to make?" Jin asked while Hobi pushed Jen's shopping cart for her.

"Oh, so you know the Japanese strawberry shortcake? I've been researching how people make it and their techniques. I want to try to create my own," she answered happily.

"You sharing?" Namjoon immediately asked.

"I want a slice," Yoongi spoke up.

"Me too~!" Hobi cheered.

"If there is anyone who deserves a slice, it's me! You are sharing, right, Jennie?" Jin asked, hopeful. 

She giggled at their enthusiasm. "Yes, I'm sharing. I'll let you guys know when I finish making it,"

The boys cheered at that, yelling happily as she laughed.

"Do you have the list of ingredients?" Yoongi asked.

"Mm hm. I have it on my phone," she answered while checking out the fruit section.

While they shopped, Yoongi began to research the Japanese Strawberry Shortcake on his phone and wandered off to grab recommended ingredients. Finding his group after a few minutes, he placed the ingredients in the cart.

"What's this?" she asked him.

"I read that these specific brands are the best for making the cake. Try it out, see if it'll enhance it," 

"Aw, thanks, Yoongi! I'll try it out,"

Yoongi smiled under his mask, happy that she accepted his suggestion. 

As they were finishing up their shopping with the boys carrying the bags for her, they began walking back to their hotel. But then, Jen's phone crashed onto the ground, being protected by her phone case after it slipped out her hands.

"Ahhhhhh~! Her phone dropped!" Hobi yelled while the guys began freaking out with him which startled her.

"Miss Bangtan dropped her phone! Holy shit!" Yoongi dramatically yelled.

"She dropped her phone! Her phone is down!" Jin cried.

"Her phone is on the ground!" Namjoon shouted as he and the rest of the boys gathered around the phone, looking down at it.

Jennie watched in amusement as they pretended to be a referee for a boxing match and began counting like it was a knockout.

"1!"

"2!"

"3!"

"4!"

"You guys are so dramatic! What the hell?" she laughed as she bent down to pick up the phone while they laughed with her. 

Once making it back to the hotel, she stayed in her room alone to work on her cake while Jungkook was still out. Looking back at the recipe and videos to make sure she followed the directions, she felt confident in having the cake turn out well. She worked hard as she followed every tip and direction, making the cake with love and putting her spin on it.

After a while, she heard a series of knocks on her door and Jen washed her hands and opened it to let Jungkook in.

"Hey! Welcome back," she gave him a sweet kiss after shutting the door.

"Hey, I missed you. How was shopping?"

"It was fun. I just finished the cake. You want to be my taste tester?"

"Hell yeah! How did it go baking it?" he asked as they walked over to the kitchen to see the delicious shortcake. 

It looked mouthwatering. The soft, fluffy sponge cake sat on a platter, decorated nicely with strawberries and whipped cream.

"I think it went all right. I didn't have any trouble when making it. I had some good references. I want to start trying new recipes to expand my baking skills,"

"So, I get to be your taste tester before you give it to the guys?" he asked happily.

She giggled. "Yes. They're eager to try it but I wanted you to try it first. I like hearing your opinions. Your feedback means a lot to me as well as your suggestions with everything,"

Jungkook smiled at that and kissed her temple. "How lucky am I? I'm glad to hear that,"

"Moment of truth. Let me know what you think," she cut a slice and placed it on a paper plate along with a plastic fork for him.

His doe eyes looked at the slice with delight as he picked up the fork to take a big bite. His expectations for her baking were always reasonably high because he was confident in how talented she was with her baking. No matter what she does, it always turns out well.

The Golden Maknae's eyebrows furrowed immediately as he continued to eat it. The cake was moist and light as the strawberries tasted sweet. Jungkook felt like he just bit into a cloud and whatever she had done for the whipped cream enhanced the cake even more. Meanwhile, Jennie watched him chew as nervousness was at the pit of her stomach. She was her worst critic when it came to baking new recipes and hoped she did it justice. 

As she observed him he looked...angry? Did it taste nasty?

'Damn, this is good. How did I get so lucky to have a girlfriend who bakes this well?' he happily thought.

Jungkook immediately ate another forkful, chewing it vigorously as he enjoyed every bite. He kept chewing while Jennie assumed it was a negative reaction and he just wanted to keep eating to not hurt her feelings.

"U-um...Kook? You good?" she asked with some nervousness in her voice.

Swallowing the sweet bite, he looked up at her as if nothing was wrong. "Yeah, why?"

"Why? You tearing that shit up but you look mad," she giggled. "Is it good or bad? You're making me a little nervous,"

He laughed at her concerns and reassured her, "It's amazing! And this is your first time making this, too? You did a great job. The right amount of sweetness and the cream is the best part. I want another slice!"

Relief washed over her as she smiled widely and kissed his cheek. So, if something tastes really good, Jungkook looks angry when eating it. Jennie made a mental note to remember that. 

[spnjediavenger]

It Won't Last Forever (Chapter 2)

Title: It Won’t Last Forever (Chapter 2)

Type: multi-chapter; father!Hotch x teen!daughter!reader, some bau x teen!reader (platonic!)

Warnings: canon-typical Criminal Minds sadness and/or violence

POSSIBLE TRIGGER WARNINGS: panic attack description, flashbacks, alludes to PTSD

Spoilers: S5 SPOILERS

Notes: This chapter is much shorter than the last since the scene has been set but hopefully it’s still good!

The panic attack and PTSD description is a mix of my own experience and some I read online - this is not how ALL panic attacks and PTSD are experienced.

As always, love and/or constructive/friendly criticism is welcome and encouraged!

Word count: 1258

“Trauma fractures comprehension as a pebble shatters a windshield. The wound at the site of impact spreads across the field of vision, obscuring reality and challenging belief.” Jane Leavy

“Ok, babygirl, you know the drill - tell me five things you can see,” Morgan coaxed gently to the girl in front of him. Hotch was needed out of town and Morgan elected to stay behind and watch over Y/n. While she was open to help, she didn’t want to see a therapist. Hotch was against this but was temporarily more lenient since she had his team to help her with her PTSD symptoms. If things got worse, then she would see someone.

“Y- I see you, the-the door, the picture of mom,” Y/n ended the last word in a sad cry.

“Come on, sweetheart, you’re doin’ good. Two more things you can see, stay with me now.”

Y/n sniffled and took a couple breaths. “My bedspread, the floor.”

“Alright, good job. Now four things you can feel.”

The girl ran her hand over her bed. “My knitted blanket…the body pillow behind me…my cheeks are wet,” she sniffled again. “And your hands.”

Morgan gave hers a squeeze. “Good. Three things you can hear.”

“Your voice…cars outside…the air conditioner.”

“Two you can smell.”

“The candle…and I can still smell the detergent on my clothes.”

“Taste?”

She let out a sad, quiet chuckle. “The salt from my tears.”

Morgan let go of one of her hands to wipe said tears from her cheeks.

“That was perfect, sweetheart. How do you feel?”

“Better,” she admitted. This wasn’t the first time one of the team walked her through a panic attack exercise and probably wouldn’t be the last. She could do them by herself at times but it was always better when she had someone with her. Each member of the team had their own methods to help her too. Morgan and JJ typically went with the five things method; Spencer would try and help her regain her breathing while he talked to her, his voice calming to her and helping her to focus on something other than her symptoms; Emily would try and ground her by getting her to pay attention to her surroundings and everything she could feel; Penelope hadn’t been needed too much but when it did happen she, like Reid, would just talk to the girl and try to stay calm herself; Rossi would guide her breathing, squeezing her hands for her to breath in and out; and her dad would hold her and do whatever else she needed. He would usually let her tell him what would help her most in each situation because many of them were different; it was these times when he was most grateful for his team and all the calming methods they taught his daughter.

Right now, it had been Morgan’s turn again.

Morgan smiled and tapped her chin. “That’s my girl.” She offered a half smile. “Do you want to talk about it?” he asked.

The girl frowned again and looked down at her hands, still being held by one of Morgan’s. Y/n squeezed his hand a bit and took a deep breath.

“I just came across one of dad’s guns. And suddenly it was in my hands and I was back there again. I’m so tired of this, De,” she whined softly, looking into his eyes.

Morgan sighed and tucked some stray hair behind one of her ears. “I know, babygirl. I know. And I’m sorry you have to go through this. But it’s all part of trauma, unfortunately. But your dad and your aunts and uncles are all here for you to help you through it. I know it’s hard now but just remember that it won’t last forever.”

Y/n couldn’t help but smile at that.

“What?”

“That’s what Spencer says.”

“And he’s right. But then again, when is pretty boy ever wrong?” Morgan added, rolling his eyes a bit but smiling when that got a genuine laugh out of Y/n. “Ohhh there’s that beautiful laugh we all love so much.”

The girl looked at him and wrapped her arms around him. “I love you, Uncle De.”

He hugged her in turn, holding a hand to her head. “I love you too, babygirl. We’ll all be here for you through it all, ok?”

“Ok.”

Morgan: Y/n/n is asleep. Had a rough day so maybe let her stay asleep when you get back. Your little man is waiting for you though

Hotch frowned and sighed before replying.

Hotch: OK. Fill me in when I get in please

Morgan: Will do

As much as Hotch wanted to see his little girl, he knew he should let her sleep. So when he walked into his home, he happily but quietly greeted Jack when he ran over to him.

“Jack! Hey, buddy!” he whisper-yelled.

“Daddy, I missed you!” his son whisper-yelled back. “Uncle D said Y/n is sleeping and to be quiet,” he informed his father.

Hotch smiled at his son’s thoughtfulness to his big sister. “That’s nice of you, buddy. Did you have a good time with your Uncle D?”

“Yeah! We played a lot and he helped Y/n when she was sad.”

Hotch gave a sad smile that Morgan shared. “That’s good. Alright, it’s pretty late, bud. Why don’t you get into bed and I’ll tuck you in when I put my stuff down?”

“Ok!”

To his word, Hotch put his son to bed when he put his things away. He then went back out to the living room. He sat in one of the chairs to face Morgan on the couch.

“So what happened?” Hotch asked him.

Morgan sighed, resting his elbows on his knees and clasping his hands together. “She got triggered when she saw one of your guns while looking for something. I helped calm her down but she got pretty tired after that.”

Hotch sighed again and ran a hand down his face. “I-”

He was cut off when a scream sounded from down the hall.

“I’ll keep Jack in his room, you go to her,” Morgan said as both men got to their feet.

“Daddy?” Jack’s voice came.

“Hey, it’s ok, little man,” Morgan said as he went into the boy’s room. “Your sister is just having a bad dream. Come with me, ok?”

As Jack followed him, Hotch went to Y/n’s room to find her writhing in her bed and crying, eyes still closed. He knelt on her bed and gently grabbed her shoulders, making her let out one more scream and open her eyes, shooting up in bed.

“Daddy?” she said, panting.

“It’s alright, honey, it was just a dream. You’re home with me,” Hotch soothed, running a hand over her messy hair.

Y/n let out a breath and ran her hands over her face as she caught her breath.

Hotch sighed as well and didn’t wait to address the elephant in the room. “It’s getting worse, Y/n. I know you don’t want to do therapy but we can’t avoid it anymore. You’re still a minor, I technically don’t need your consent to send you to therapy but I would feel a lot better if I had it.”

Y/n searched her father’s eyes before looking away and nodding. The man let out a relieved sigh and pulled her in for a hug.

“Can one of you always be with me though?” she asked with a small voice.

“Of course, sweetheart.”

The girl nodded into his shoulder and continued hugging him, relishing in his warmth and comfort. She hated the idea of having to let a stranger into her personal life but she knew this wouldn’t go away without help.

Kiera Cass said: “Accepting help is its own kind of strength.”

[crazyunsexycool]

The Sun ☀️, The Moon 🌙 & the Stars ✨

Chapter 9: Stormy skies

Pairing: alpha!steve rogers x alpha!bucky barnes x alpha!sam Wilson x omega!reader

Word count: 5.3k

Warnings: some fluff, some heavy petting, someone is trying to get to reader

A/N: here is the next chapter I’m so sorry this took forever I really didn’t know how to end this chapter but next chapter will be very fun because it’s Steve’s birthday!!!!!

Series masterlist

Ch. 8

It had been a few days since your friends and mates had spent time together. You felt like you were dreaming. It was a nice way to spend your day at work, it made it go by faster. Just like the last few days, Mrs. Levy would get downstairs and wait for you by the door. Usually you would make sure she got home safe but today there was a certain someone waiting for you.

“Hi, honey.” You greeted Steve cheerfully when you were close enough. His eyes snapped up to watch you get closer. You noticed how his eyes traveled up and down your sundress clad figure and heat creeped up your cheeks.

“Hey, sweetheart.”

“This is Mrs. Levy. Mrs. Levy, this is Steve.” You introduced the older woman to your alpha and it was like watching a schoolgirl talk to her crush. When Steve held his hand out and smiled her cheeks were practically crimson with how much she blushed.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you ma’am.”

“No, the pleasure is all mine.” She smiled, then she cleared her throat and scowled in his direction. Using her cane to point at him. “I’m going to tell you what I told her other alpha, if you hurt her you’ll have to deal with me. And I’m worse than Jonah and Ricky.”

“Understood ma’am. Although I would never intentionally hurt her. You have my word.”

“I’ll keep my eyes on you.”

“Yeah you will.” You wiggled your eyebrows in her direction. Your phone goes off. “Ophelia, your Uber is here.”

“Ok, well have a good evening and I’ll see you tomorrow. Remember that’s two alphas and one to go.”

“I’ll make sure you meet Sam soon.” You smile.

“Bye.” Steve waves at her as she gets in the car. “She seems intimidating.” He laughs.

“She can be when she wants too.” You wrap your arms around his waist and bury your face in his chest. His scent brings you comfort. “I missed you.”

“I missed you too.” He kisses the top of your head. “So what do you want to do?”

You look up at him and notice how tired he looks. Like he hadn’t slept for days but you knew he hadn’t been on missions. Maybe some nightmares, like Bucky.

“How about we go back to my place, order something for dinner and just relax?”

“That sounds amazing. But are you sure you don’t want to go out?”

“Nope.” You knew he would take you if you asked. “I’m tired and I really just want to cuddle.”

“Well I can do that.”

“You ordered like three meals for yourself. I didn’t know you could eat that much.” You said as you picked up the empty containers of Chinese food.

“It’s because of the serum.” He says as he helps.

“Or because your stomach is a black hole.”

Steve chuckles as he tosses the last containers in the trash. When he turns around he finds you holding a container.

“A blondie for my blondie?”

Steve laughs again as he grabs one of the sweet treats you had made just for him. He takes a bite and moans.

“Thank you sweetheart. This is really good.”

*******

A movie was playing in the background, you weren’t sure what it was about. You were too distracted by the warmth Steve’s body gave off. The serum, he told you as you snuggled closer into his side. His fingers drew lazy patterns on your skin while keeping his attention on the tv. You however were distracted by him. The curve of his plump lips, the way his hair fell out of place, the way his eyes crinkled when he smiled genuinely.

“You’re staring.” Steve said without looking away from the tv.

“No I’m not.”

“You aren’t?” Steve chuckles.

“No, I’m admiring. It’s different.”

He looks down at you with a smile, his arm tightens around your waist. You make the first move by pulling him down so that you could connect his lips to yours. Steve pulls you into his lap effortlessly without breaking the kiss. Your hands are in his hair and you swear you hear him groan when you tug his silky strands. He fights for dominance over the kiss and the growl that rumbles through his chest is enough to make you want to present for your alpha. It wasn’t until his hands were on your hips that you realized that you were grinding against him. And it was obvious you weren’t the only one affected by the close contact.

“Fuck.” Steve says breathlessly. “Sweetheart we can’t, not yet.”

“Why not?”

“Because if we do I’ll want to claim you and it can be painful for you.” Steve said before kissing the place on your neck where his mark would go.

“But Steve…”

“Nuh-uh starlight, don’t you want to be my good girl?”

“What do I get if I’m bad?” You say as you close the space between his lips and yours.

You felt his fingers dig into the soft flesh of your hips as he laughed.

“You’ll get into trouble.”

“Mmm, trouble with you? Sounds like fun.”

Steve tilted his head up slightly connecting his lips to yours. A small moan escapes you and Steve takes advantage of it. His tongue slips past your lips. He had been dying to feel you pressed up against him like this, to taste you. You were everything he thought and more, sweet like the notes of honey in your scent. Steve’s lips move away from yours and travel down your chin, he nips and kisses along your neck. He finds a spot below your ear that has you preening and tugging at his hair. You feel his teeth on the crook of your neck and your eyes flutter close.

“There we go.” He says softly before kissing the same spot. Your fingers brush up against the area and you feel the bite mark he left although it didn’t break skin. “It’s not permanent, yet.” He sighs “It’s getting late sweetheart and I know you work tomorrow, I should go.”

“Ok.” You say with a pout which he kisses away.

“Call me if you need anything.”

“I will.”

“Oh, Tony is having a Fourth of July party and I put your pack on the list.”

“Isn’t the fourth your birthday?” You ask as you follow him to the door.

“Yup,” he turns to look at you. “Would you consider staying the night with us? Nothing has to happen, we just want to spend a little bit more than a few hours together.”

“I’d like that a lot.”

“Good. I’ll see you soon then.” He kisses you again, his lips soft yet demanding against yours. “Goodnight sweetheart.”

“I’m going to need the coldest shower.” You rest your head against the closed door muttering to yourself.

It was a little after midnight when you were startled awake. You had been in a deep sleep so it took a moment for you to realize what woke you up. A scent. Not just any scent, the one from the hallway a few days ago. It was so strong it almost felt like the person was standing over you. Your apartment was extremely quiet so you hear the jingle of a door knob being turned. Immediately your heart rate picks up. You head toward your bedroom door and open it just a little to figure out if someone broke in. Further down you hear what you’re sure to be the apartment door rattle. Someone was definitely trying to break in. There’s a growl loud enough to make a shiver run down your spine and you scramble to get the baseball bat from underneath the bed. You jump when your phone starts vibrating and when you grab it you see Steve’s face on the screen so you answer.

“What’s wrong?” He says before you’re able to say anything. There’s rustling in the background like he was maybe getting dressed.

“I think someone is trying to break into my apartment.” You whisper.

“Where are you now?”

“In my room.” You gasp when you hear a bang at the door. “I think they’re trying to kick the door down. What do I do Stevie?”

“Can you get out using the fire escape?”

“No, the ladder sticks and won’t go down all the way. It’s too high for me to jump down to the ground.”

“You’ll have to stay in your room, can you block the door somehow?”

“With my dresser.”

“Do that and stay in there we’re on our way ok?”

“Ok.” You cover your mouth with your hand when another bang comes from outside. “Please hurry.” You move quickly to push your dresser against the door. Another bang echoes through the apartment. You were silently thanking Jonah and Ricky for installing the extra locks on your door.

“Darling, what’s happening?” Bucky asked as you moved to the furthest corner of your room.

“They’re still there.”

You were starting to panic. There was a tightness in your chest and it felt like you couldn’t breathe. Tears were starting to form in your eyes. Bucky was talking but you couldn’t hear what he was saying. All of your attention was on the door. The apartment door slams against the wall and you do your best not to scream. It felt like you were sitting there for ages. With shaky hands you hold up the phone to your ear.

“They’re inside.” You whimper at the sound of the bedroom’s handle jiggling. There’s a knock on your window and you practically jump.

Bucky is standing on your fire escape motioning for you to open the window. There’s another bang against the door and it’s strong enough to move the dresser. You feel frozen where you stood, your eyes glued to the door. Bucky knocks again and this time you move quickly and unlock the window. There’s a grunt and something smashing outside of your door.

“Are you ok? Are you hurt?” Bucky looks you over. All you can manage to do is shake your head no. He pulls you into his chest, letting his scent surround you. His presence was enough for you to calm down.

There’s a knock on the door and you jump again.

“Sweetheart it’s me, it’s Steve. Can you open the door?” Steve says from the other side.

Bucky pulls the dresser out of the way easily. He opens the door and Steve rushes in heading straight to you.

“Are you ok?”

“I am now.” You lean into his touch as he checks you over just like Bucky had. “Did you get whoever it was?”

“Yes, we got him. Sam is talking with the police now.” He places a kiss on your forehead. “You can’t stay here for now. Why don’t you pack a bag and you can stay with us for a few days. At least until we get your door fixed.”

“Ok.” You hug him before you turn to start packing.

Sam had his arm around your shoulders, Steve stood in front of you and Bucky was next to you both holding the bags you’d packed in a hurry. You weren’t sure how long you’d be staying with them but you know there wasn’t enough clothing, especially for work. But you’d worry about that later, all you wanted now was to sleep.

Steve and Bucky disappeared further in the apartment while Sam led you to the living room. He sat you down and went to the kitchen, coming back a few minutes later with a steaming mug of something.

“Chamomile tea,” he said as he set the mug down. “Try to drink some, it should help relax you some.”

“Why? Do I not look relaxed?”

He chuckles because he can clearly see how tense you are and because he knows you’re joking. Sam sat next to you and he let you settle into his side. You let your head rest against his chest and you could hear his heart beating. It calmed you more than any tea ever could.

“What are Steve and Bucky doing?”

“They’re getting a room ready for you.” He says as his hand moves up and down your arm absentmindedly. “How are you feeling after what happened?”

“I don’t know,” you answer after a moment. “It still feels like a nightmare. I'm a bit confused.”

“Confused about what?”

“Well when I realized someone was trying to break in, Steve called me and asked me what was wrong. But how could he know something was wrong if I hadn’t even had a chance to call the police?”

Sam smiles as he tilts your head back. His fingers trace the area Steve’s bite mark is.

“He knew something was wrong because he felt it through this. Even though this is temporary it works similar to an actual bond.”

“Oh, that makes sense.”

“What makes sense?” Steve asked as he walked back into the living room. Bucky trailing behind looking upset.

“How you knew I was in trouble.”

Steve sat next to you and placed his hand on your thigh. He squeezed lightly before moving his hand up and down. The whole ordeal had been exhausting and you couldn’t stifle the yawn that escaped you.

“You should get to bed. Let me show you where you’ll stay.” Bucky spoke up. Instead of letting you get up and walk he threw you over his shoulder.

“Bucky.” You squeaked in surprise before laughing. “I can walk, you know.”

“Doesn’t mean you have too.”

“Goodnight boys.”

“Goodnight.” Both Sam and Steve replied.

He set you down once you were inside a bedroom. His scent was all over the place and it was very comforting but it wouldn’t be enough.

“Bucky, would you stay with me?”

“Of course.” He smiles and you head straight for bed where either Steve or Bucky had pulled out the blankets you’d brough with you.

It took you a few minutes but you arranged them in a way that was comforting for you. Once you settled in bed you looked up to see Bucky leaning against the door with a smile on his face.

“What?”

“Nothing, you’re just cute. Can I enter your nest?”

“It’s not a nest it’s just-“ you started saying as you looked around and sure enough it looked similar to the nests you’ve seen pictures of. “A… nest. Yes you can come in.”

Bucky kicks off his boots and jacket before climbing into bed with you. He opens his arms and you settle in next to him. You relax immediately and it doesn’t take long for you to fall asleep.

You wake up first. The bed is a mess of blankets and bodies. It seemed like after you fell asleep Steve and Sam joined you in bed. As quickly as possible you get out of bed, hoping not to disturb the sleeping men. Sam reaches over the spot you were just in and instead of finding you finds Bucky, pulling him closer. With a smile you sneak out of the room and head toward the living room where you left your purse. You check your phone and you’re up thirty minutes before your alarm would have gone off.

In the kitchen you start the coffee maker and begin to rummage around for sugar, creamer and a mug. There’s a slight breeze behind you but you don’t pay attention to it thinking it’s the A/C kicking on.

“Good morning.” You hear behind you in a voice you don’t recognize. A scream rips from your throat and the mug you had in your hand almost falls to the ground. The surprise visitor held out the mug for you. “Sorry I didn’t mean to scare y-“

The man that had surprised you is pulled away by an angry looking Bucky. Your hand is on your chest and once you realize who it is you chuckle. Steve and Sam are right behind Bucky. Looking as if they’re ready to murder someone.

“Buck it’s ok. Let Pietro go.” Steve said, softly putting a hand on Bucky’s shoulder.

Bucky didn’t listen, his eyes still held a murderous gaze. You stepped in between him and Pietro and placed a hand on his cheek.

“Hey I’m fine. I was just surprised, that's all. Can you let Pietro go now?”

Bucky lets go of Pietro and wraps his arms around you instead. He pulls you into his chest and buries his face into your neck as he turns his back to the beta.

“I really am sorry. I didn’t realize your omega was in.”

“It’s ok, Pietro. There was a break in at my apartment and I guess I’m still jumpy. It’s nice to meet you though. I’m Y/N by the way.” You say as you lean to the side to look past Bucky.

“It is nice to meet you as well. The team will be excited to know you’re finally here. These three don’t stop talking about you.”

“Really?”

“Oh yeah. You should hear what they say.”

“Ok and that’s enough. Why are you here roadrunner?” Sam asks.

“Steve was going to train with me today. When he didn’t show up I came to check in. Since he’s so old, you know?”

You giggle and hide your face in Bucky’s chest when Steve playfully glares at you.

“Pietro I’m sorry I completely forgot. Would you be ok if we rescheduled for later today.”

“No problem. See you around Y/N.” He says and runs out, leaving before you’re able to say goodbye.

Even after Pietro is gone and it’s just the four of you, Bucky doesn’t let go. You try to walk away from his grasp but he only tightens his hold on you. He lifts you up and sits you on the counter and hides his face in your neck.

“Uh- Bucky?”

“Just give him a minute. You’re not the only one that’s still one edge because of last night. And when we heard your scream and you weren’t in bed well…” Sam says and motions to Bucky.

Nod in understanding and wrap your arms around him. You play with his hair and Bucky starts to relax against you.

“I didn’t mean to scare you guys.”

“It’s ok. We just want to keep you safe is all.” Bucky mumbles once he finally pulls away.

He’s quickly replaced by Sam who also hides his face in your neck. You feel the tip of his nose move up your neck as he inhales deeply. Steve took his own turn scenting you. He finished by placing a kiss on the temporary bond mark on your neck.

After that the four of you spent the morning getting ready for the day. When it was time for you to go to work Bucky insisted on taking you. You couldn’t deny him the request since you were now aware of his worry over your safety.

You weren’t sure what was worse, your alphas and mates fussing over you because they were worried or your pack mates doing the same thing. Jonah and Ricky hovered, even Mrs. Levy would call down to reception throughout the day to make sure you weren’t in danger. And it went on all week. It was somehow endearing and annoying at the same time.

You were grateful it was Friday and that you wouldn’t have to be escorted from the tower to your job for at least three days thanks to the long weekend. When you get outside though it’s not your alphas that are waiting for you, it’s the Black Widow herself. You’d only met her briefly a few weeks back but still you walked up to her with a nervous smile. Mrs. levy eyed her up and down before saying her goodbyes.

“Hey Y/N, the guys asked me to pick you. There was some incident at training and they had to handle it.”

“Are they ok?” You say as you check your phone, there weren't any unread messages from them.

“Yeah, some recruits got overly confident. Happens every time there’s a new group.” She waves her hand dismissively.

“Oh ok. Well since it’s you here and not them, especially Steve, would it be ok to make two stops?”

“Depends on where.”

“The apartment and an art studio.” You look at her hopefully.

At the end of the day it is in an alpha’s nature to want to make omegas happy and apparently the infamous spy isn’t immune.

“As long as it’s quick.”

“Thank you so much,” you say as you get in the car. “I’ve needed to get a few things, especially a gift for Steve’s birthday but they would not take me back to the apartment.”

“They tend to be overprotective when it comes to something or someone they care about, especially if it’s you. Those three have been a pain in the ass since the break in though.”

You chuckle because it’s true but you appreciate what they’ve done for you. “Still, it’s nice someone cares that much for me. I’ve never had that before.”

Nat takes her eyes off the road for a moment and studies you. From what she knew, which was more than she would ever let on, most of your life had been full of abuse and trauma. She hadn’t really looked into your family but she did look into the hospital visits and reports from school which listed all of the things done to you. She did it to protect her friends and make sure you weren’t trying to hurt them. The more she learned the more she understood why Sam, Steve and Bucky were acting the way they were. It’s why she volunteered to pick you up today. She’d seen the reported abuse but now she was really putting a face to the survivor. And you sat in the passenger's seat humming along to the song playing on the radio with a certain lightness and love for life.

When Nat parks the car you don’t immediately get out. No, instead you take a moment and look around trying to find something or someone out of place. Once you’re satisfied you open the passenger’s side door and step out. Nat follows your lead all the way up to your apartment. The door and lock had been replaced and you fished around your bag to get the new key. The stench from the alpha that broke in still lingered in the air. You still hadn’t been told why he was trying to get in though.

“You can make yourself comfortable if you want. I’m just going to grab a few extra clothes and one of Steve’s gifts.” You say as you walk further into the apartment but Nat follows you and stops at the door, not wanting to invade what was supposed to be your nest.

You move around the room gracefully as you pull out an extra bag and some more clothes. Then you dig in the back of the closet for the present you had bought. It was only one of two but it still didn’t feel like enough.

“So, do you have a mate? Or are you courting someone?” You ask as you open your drawers. “I’m sorry, that’s none of my business.”

“It’s ok, I’m courting Bruce actually.”

“I can see that. You’d totally be cute together.” You say while double checking your bag. “Ok I’m ready to go.”

You stopped at the art studio to pick up Steve’s other gift and now Nat was pulling into a parking spot in the tower’s garage. She leads you to the elevators and the stench from the night of the break in hits you again. Immediately you’re on edge as you look around the parking lot and Nat curses under her breath. One of the elevators opens to reveal two agents and two cops escorting a man in handcuffs.

His eyes snap up to yours and he gives you an evil grin. Your breath hitches as he gets closer and he stops right in front of you. He towers over you and his smile turns into a sneer.

“You stupid fucking bitch.” He spits out. “You just had to ruin everything didn’t you?”

“Shut up.”

“You don’t tell me what to do. You’re a worthless broken omega whore. Always have been and always will be.” He tries to lunge at you but the agents pull him back and toward the awaiting cop car. But he’s too strong for them and he just walks back toward you. This time Nat stands in front of you ready to attack if he tries anything.

“Enjoy being their rut toy while you still can. He’s coming for you and this time he’s going to rip out your throat.”

“I’d like to see him try.” You say through gritted teeth.

The cops and agents pull him away but his eyes stay on you the whole time. Nat turns and blocks your view.

“How do you know him?”

“That’s my brother Daniel.” You say as you wipe away a tear and turn back toward the elevator.

Your heart was practically beating out of your chest. Ignoring the rest of Nat’s questions you turned and headed to the elevators. You wanted to be alone. It had been years since you’d seen your brother and it pained you that his scent was unrecognizable.

When the elevator doors opened your three alphas were already there waiting. You ignored them and pushed through to get into the apartment and into the room you’d been using. Panic, fear and worry were all making your scent sour.

“Y/N? Is everything ok?” Steve had called out but you didn’t answer. “What happened while you were out?”

All three alphas turned their attention to Nat.

“You know the alpha that broke into her apartment?” They nodded. “It’s her brother, Daniel. Said some horrible things. And then said he was going to rip her throat out.”

“Who is he?”

“No idea.”

They looked at each other concerned. Then Sam and Bucky walked back toward the room you’d been using in order to check up on you.

“Can you-“

“Already on it, Rogers. I’ll check in with Tony to see if we can look into the men in her life. Though we don’t have much to go on.” Nat looks up at him and studies his face. “She’s good for all of you. I’m glad you found each other. Make sure you take care of her.”

“Of course. I think her pack would kill us if we did anything to even upset her.”

“She has a pack?”

“Yeah, work friends. One of them has a mate. They made their own pack.”

Nat nods. “I’ll let you know if I find anything.”

“Thanks Nat.”

She leaves just as Sam and Bucky walk back out into the living room. Bucky was pacing back and forth. Anxious and worried for whatever it was that happened to you.

“She locked herself in the room and she doesn’t want to come out. She won’t even answer us. What should we do?”

“I’m not sure, Sam. I guess we'll just wait it out.”

“What? No, she needs us. We can’t just let her feel alone and scared.” Bucky argued. He was getting riled up. Bucky didn’t like to see those he cared about be upset especially if he couldn’t really do anything about it.

“Baby,” Sam walked up to him, effectively cutting off Bucky’s pacing. He takes Bucky’s face in his hands. “I know you want to help her but maybe she just needs a minute to gather her thoughts. It’s just like when you need to be alone sometimes after a nightmare.” Sam presses his lips against Bucky’s and the latter relaxes just a bit. “Let’s give her a moment. Why don’t we go get something for her.”

“Like what?”

“I don’t know, how about some flowers. Something to cheer her up.”

Bucky nods and turns to look at Steve.

“I will let you know the moment she’s out. Go, get our girl something good.”

“Ok.”

Sam and Steve look at each other in silent understanding before they share a brief kiss. Then Sam heads out the door with Bucky and Steve heads in the direction of the room you’ve locked yourself in.

The moment you got to the room you locked yourself in and then you grabbed one of the blankets that smelled just like the boys, wrapping it around yourself. Their combined scents brought you comfort and it’s exactly what you needed even if you wanted to be alone. Bucky and Sam called your name softly through the door but you ignored them. You climbed into your nest and tightened the blanket around you. Everything your brother said to you kept replaying in your head over and over again until you fell asleep.

About an hour later you feel a dip in the bed. Your eyes flutter open and they land on Steve. He smiles and when he reaches out to cup your cheek you flinch away from his touch. His smile falters a little but he doesn’t get upset. At least not with you.

“Sweetheart, are you ok? We’re worried about you.”

“I don’t know. Did Nat-“

“She told us. You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.”

“Ok.” You pushed the blanket off of yourself just enough to reach out for him. “Could you stay with me?”

Steve smiles again and lays down behind you. His warmth is welcomed and the weight of his arm in your waist is somehow comforting. The door opens and you see Sam and Bucky standing there waiting. You pull back the covers and Bucky moves first. Sam sits up against the headboard and winks in your direction when you look up at him.

“I’m sorry if I made you worry.”

“It’s ok. It must have been a shock to see your brother.” Sam answers.

“Yeah, I haven’t seen him in years.” You say as you snuggle into Bucky’s chest. “I think something happened to him. He was never that aggressive.”

“Was he protective over you?”

“Not really but if my dad ever told him to punish me he wouldn’t hit me as hard or whatever my dad told him to do.”

All three of them tense at the information and the way you say it so casually. They had all tried to talk with your brother for a week and he didn’t say a word but they could tell something was wrong. However at the moment their focus is on you and only you.

“We’ll figure it out ok. You don’t have to worry about him.” Bucky says.

“I do, he’s my brother. We were treated differently because he was an alpha but my parents were horrible to him too. I can’t just ignore all of that now.”

“That’s understandable but we don’t want to have you meet him again until we can figure out what’s going on with him. Is that ok?”

“It’s ok. I know you just want to protect me.” You turn in Bucky’s embrace to look at Steve. “I’ve never had this before and I trust you, all of you, so I’ll listen to what you say.”

Steve kisses your forehead as you get more comfortable. You can’t help but think of your brother when he was younger and now. How he tried and failed to protect you. It was his instinct not only as your older brother but as an alpha. Maybe he knew back then that you were an omega.

“I think he was trying to warn me.” You say after a few minutes of silence.

“Warn you about what?” Sam asks from behind you.

“Maybe someone is after me? Danny said ‘he’s coming for you’ when we were little he’d always tell me what was going to happen so that I could at least be ready for it.”

“But who is he?”

“Maybe it’s your dad.” Bucky offered but he was really talking to Sam and Steve. Sam gets up and excuses himself. He quickly goes off to find Nat to help her look into who might be after you.

“We’ll figure it out and keep you safe, Darling.”

“I know you will.”

Ch 10

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[aszles]

csm chapter 120 but in toki pona (first 10 pages)

alright hellooo!!!! this is my first published translation in 2024 i guess!

of course i'm marketing this towards english speakers since i'm not sure if there actually is a part of the csm fandom that speaks toki pona... i hope you'll stick around to see something a little fun and different!

so if you don't know what toki pona is, allow me to explain! ☝️🤓 toki pona is a conlang created by Sonja Lang where the main draw of it is that it has less than 200 words! it sounds like it may be tricky to speak with so few words, but it's surprisingly easy and very fun! i always recommend it to anyone who has a bit of time on their hands and wants to try something new.

here i was mostly trying out gimp for comic translations, and so i translated the first 10 pages of chapter 120! i chose this because... it's silly! also fun fact, the start of this chapter was one of the things that pushed me to read chainsaw man!

ok that's enough preface rambling, let's get on with it!

i think typically the first page should be full sized if it has to, but nayuta peace sign is just so cute..!

alright, if you wanna feel like you're on a date with asa then keep reading to find an english translation and translator's notes! if not... feel free to leave, i hope you eat something nice today! (omekapo!)

semi-literal translation:

yoru: woof! woof! woof!!

nayuta: HAHAHAHAHAHA!! yoru: woof woof! wooof!! denji: Nayuta! what did you do?! nayuta: i turned her into an animal. denji: why?!?! nayuta: because she [kissed] my thing! (here she basically says that yoru interacted with nayuta's thing using her mouth. it's a very vague statement)

denji: i'm not your thing! turn her into a human now!! nayuta: want food! can't! (technically she says "food desire! no ability!") nuh uh! denji: ah?! i'll make food. when you eat turn her into a human!! nayuta: 'kay!

denji: eat and turn her into a human. i'm not joking. nayuta: hey! this is my food! bad! bad!! nayuta: hey... do you really want her humanity? (sounds very weird in english but i'm not sure a better way to put it) denji: what?

nayuta: Denji. every woman tries to kill you, right? why is this animal different? denji: why...? i have a feeling. nayuta: hmmmm.... good. (this is being used as an affirmation similar to "alright" or "very well then") you won't die. okay. i'll turn her into a human.

nayuta: but, two things. if they're not good to you, then she'll be an animal forever. denji: what are they?! nayuta: number one. i can eat ice cream (cold sweet) all the time. denji: i want (it) too. nayuta: number two.

nayuta: don't be nice to her. denji: are you joking?! nayuta: uh, i'm (being) real. this is the best. she's bad to my nose. denji: your nose?

denji: is she like a wet animal? nayuta: weirdo, wet animals are good! anyways, don't be nice to her! i'll change her knowledge... so that to her you didn't come (today)! denji: you'll what?! then she'll hate me!

nayuta: not important. you won't talk to her. denji: ahhh...

denji: you're number one, nayuta...

tadaaaa! there we have it! now time for some translator notes, of which there are actually not a ton.

toki pona is surprisingly difficult to adapt for different kinds of characters. due to having no register, it's hard to make characters seem more punky or polite than normal, and to distinguish between adult and child characters. here particularly we have the issue that, while Nayuta is a child, she's also super smart! so making grammatical mistakes doesn't really seem in line for her character. the main action i took was doubling up "la" with her. this isn't incorrect, but there are more optimal ways to say things to avoid ambiguity. i thought that perhaps a kid wouldn't think ahead with their words as much as an adult would, and may end up with this quirk in their speech.

related to the last note, one possible way of making a character seem younger or less proper is having them use nimisin ("unofficial" community made words). it's a fun idea, but it's kinda inaccessible and also... i don't really know nimisin! guess i'm not hip enough >_<

the name Nayuta luckily fits with toki pona phonetics (with the y changed to a j)! Denji doesn't quite, so i opted for Tensi. this is the most direct tokiponisation of his name. it sounds a bit like tenshi! (angel in japanese)

just a little something. i went with humans being "jan" and devils "monsuta" (hybrids and fiends may be jan monsuta and monsuta jan respectively, or they could have nimisin) so.. why are these two using jan? well for Denji that's an easier question, as he is basically human-first and also had the name before he became a hybrid. (also there's no need to be so descriptive with a headnoun) as for Nayuta, she uses jan because she's sort of undercover. depending on the circumstances, or when referring to her with her real name (like saying Control Devil in english) she would be monsuta. some devils who gave themself a name use jan, while others such as Power use monsuta (because why would she call herself a human when devils are clearly superior?!)

suwi lete or lete suwi? that is the question. here i decided to go with suwi lete because i think the most appealing aspect to Nayuta is likely the sweetness!

i hope this was at least somewhat enjoyable! i wonder what i'll find to translate next >w> thank you so much for reading if you did! sina lukin la mi pilin pona a!

[jaybird-fanfics]

Burnt Out: Chapter Fifteen

You were back at Dabi's apartment, Toga was helping tend to your wounds. As she did so, neither of you spoke, both unsure of what to say. While you were ashamed that someone knew about your situation with Ryuji, Toga didn't to say anything to upset you any further. Though she was curious, she admits. Mostly about what your history was with Dabi, and why you meant so much to him. Thankfully the silence wouldn't last much longer, as the door opened up, Dabi making his way through. Toga looks to him before briefly turning her attention back to you. "Looks like he won." She says with a grin before standing up from the couch. She walks away from you towards Dabi. "I'm sure you two need some alone time, so I'll be heading out." Dabi glances at her. "Better keep your mouth shut about this to Shigaraki." Toga chuckles. "Yeah yeah. Don't worry, I'm no snitch. See you around." She waved her hand before leaving you and Dabi. Dabi's gaze fell onto you, before he could get a word out. You stood and rushed to him, grabbing him into a hug. Dabi wrapped his arms around you as your body shook, crying into his chest. He rubbed your back soothingly. "It's alright. He's gone now. That jackass can't hurt you anymore." He says softly. You clutched onto his shirt, choked sobs leaving you. He's gone. He's gone, finally he's gone. And Dabi's still here with you. "Toya..." You cried. Dabi hushed you gently, he lead you back to the couch and sat you down on his lap. He pulled back from the hug, only to wipe away a few of your tears. He took a long look at your face and body, bruised and bandaged. It was a fucking shame, that your beautiful skin had to be tainted by such a shitty excuse for a human being. Multiple times you had suffered at his hands, but not anymore. Dabi internally smirked and reveled in the memory of Ryuji's dying screams of agony.

Dabi moved some stray strands of hair away from your face. Despite the bruises, you still kept your beauty in his eyes. You've looked past his scars, why shouldn't he do the same for you? He smiled softly before closing the gap between you both and met his lips with your own. You sighed shakily into the kiss, eyes fluttering shut. If you could, you'd stay in the moment with him forever. Just enjoying him, his soft touches, his love. And that's what it was, Dabi loved you. He's always loved you, even back then, and you were just too blind at the time to see it. But it's so clear to you now. It was clear that night you two spend together. When the two of you separated from the kiss, you spoke with a soft and whispered breath. "I love you Toya." You lean forwards to kiss him again, this one shorter however. "I love you so much." Your voice started to tremble. "And I can't thank you enough for everything you've done." Dabi's hand found its way to your own. "You don't have to thank me." He tells you. "I'm just glad you're ok."

"I was so stupid. I should have never trusted him." You sniffle. "That day, I should have just ignored him. I let him sweet talk me into thinking he was actually good. That he actually cared about me. None of this would have happened if I had just..." You trailed off. Your heart felt heavy, deep regret setting in as everything had come crashing down on you all at once. All those years, you were used and abused over and over, not just from Ryuji, but from the many others you were forced to sleep with. All that pain. All that time wasted. All because you decided to trust Ryuji. He has reduced you into...this. A broken shell of what you once were. The life you had, that light, the spark within you, destroyed into near nothingness. At one point, you were sure it had been. That there was nothing left for you in the end. Because in life, all you were good for was using your body to please others. You contributed nothing to the world around you. You did things you are not proud of. And one day, when you die, there would be no one to mourn you. You would not be missed. You were just another unfortunate soul, who was swept up into a tragic way of life. No friends, no family. Alone, with the choices you made, willingly or not.

All had seemed hopeless. And there were nights where you considered taking your own life, just to end the cycle of pain. But that was all before Toya had entered your life once more.

Even as he is now, he continues to light up your broken world. He made you feel as if you were still new, still that same innocent girl from before. Though he was a villain, he would forever be your hero. Whether he wants to acknowledge it or not. Had life just turned out a little differently, you didn't doubt for a second that he could have done for others what he's done for you. But no one can predict the way life works, it can be cruel and unfair, and some things will happen that are out of anyone's control. Maybe he could have done some things a little differently, maybe you could have too. But who's to say if things would have been any better for either of you? What did matter right now, is that you both had each other again. And as long as you both would live, there would be nothing or no one that would ever get in the way of that again. Life is unpredictable, yet so precious. All the more reason to never separate again.

"He manipulated you. He saw a pretty girl down on her luck and tricked you into thinking he wanted to help you." Dabi tells you. "I should have been there." His expression fell into one of anger and frustration. Not towards anyone but himself. "If I had just been there for you, you wouldn't have ended up in that situation in the first place. That fucker would have never got to you, and you would have been spared all his bullshit." You gripped onto Dabi's hand slightly. "I don't blame you." You tell him. "But I do wish you would have came to me when all that shit happened to you. I would have done anything to try and help you out of that mess." Dabi sighed, his head fell onto your shoulder. "I didn't want you involved. Besides, I was too far gone. You would have just gotten hurt." You wanted to argue, but Dabi continued. "You shouldn't worry about me. It's my old man you should be worrying about. He's gonna regret ever having brought me into this world when I get my hands on him...All in time." Dabi smirked. "For though." He looks down at you. "You're my main priority. As long as I breathe, you will never live in fear or suffering again. I'll make sure of it." Well, he's already made sure of it. He decided not to think about it right now, he just wanted to enjoy you until morning came.

"I don't want to burden you." You say. Dabi scoffed. "You are never a burden. Take that back." He plants a soft kiss on your cheek. "You think I'd keep anyone around that I felt like got in my way? Hell no. You topple over everyone else, you're always going to be more important. Always." You couldn't help but smile. He never fails. You lean into him, resting your head on his chest. "You better not regret saying that." Dabi falls back onto the couch, keep you close as he laid down. He kissed the top of your head before speaking. "Never in a million years, would I ever regret someone like you being in my life." Your heart skipped a beat at his words. Then a tiny yawn left you. God, you've never felt more exhausted before tonight. It felt like you hadn't slept in days. You slowly let your eyes fall to a close, listening to the sound of Dabi breathing before finally slipping into sleep.

[meetmypointlessaddiction]

So It's Gonna Be Forever

Summary: Joel Miller and Emily Harper have been best friends since 2nd grade and at the end of freshman year become something more. Will they last or will their new label ruin it all.

OR

Joel Miller gets some lovin' because god knows he deserves it.

Chapter 1

Warnings: Mentions of rough childhood and some violence between father and son but that isn't for another few chapters. Mentions and allusions to smut but never actually turns into smut.

I understand that this might not be everyone's cup of tea so if it's not for you, just don't read.

If there's anything that is possibly triggering that I haven't mentioned in the warnings please let me know as this is not beta'd and it is very possible that I've missed something.

Series Masterlist

Words: 2,757

Joel Miller was extremely unlucky. His mother died halfway through his sophomore year and his father spiralled into a good for nothing drunk, leaving him and his younger brother Tommy to fend for themselves. When their father hit his lowest points, Joel was always the one to take the blame, not wanting Tommy to be too badly affected and from there sprouted a routine of protecting and doing everything he could to not disappoint anyone else. 

Emily Harper had been a friend of the Miller’s ever since they met on a playground in their neighbourhood. Since then, their relationship had only grown from strength to strength, the pair eventually becoming something more than friends at the end of their freshman year. However, being the best friend/girlfriend of Joel Miller came with some additions. It also meant that she was close with Tommy, the two never far away from each other. Her parents loved Joel and Tommy like their own sons, often inviting them round for a dinner they knew would otherwise be forgotten about once they returned home. 

“Come on, Joel. It’s one night away from him, please? He can even stay with my parents if he wants to.” Emily begged, tugging on Joel’s hand. The pair walked home together every day, Tommy meeting them there after walking with his friends. Every Saturday, the popular kids threw parties for the seniors, usually celebrating a football win. 

“Em, please? I really don’t wanna go, maybe next time.” Joel tried, trying desperately to wriggle his way out of it. Joel Miller was not a partying kind of kid, preferring to sit at home with Tommy, preparing himself for the next screaming attack from his father. “Listen, you know I’m not a social kind of guy. Why don’t you come round, I’ll find some beers from somewhere and we’ll kick back and relax.” 

“If we’re not going to a party, I’m not sittin’ in your place again, the cable doesn’t even work most days. You’re not workin’ tomorrow, Tommy ain’t got nothin’ planned, come over, have dinner. I’ll get my dad to buy a few beers and they might even let Tommy have one, no harm no foul.” She shrugged and Joel contemplated it. It was a Friday night, their dad wouldn’t be back until the early hours of the morning and he would pass out before he had the chance to go looking for either of his sons. 

“Fine, fine. I’ll wait for Tommy and then we’ll come over with a change of clothes. An hour, tops.” Joel decided, the pair coming to a stop outside the Miller Household. “We won’t be long, ok?” He muttered as she pulled him in for a hug, kissing his cheek. 

“Do me a favour, cowboy? Stop bein’ so damn stubborn all the time?” She teased, punching his arm. “We have this conversation every Friday and you always use Tommy as your get out of jail free card. Come up with a better excuse. I love you.” She laughed, walking down the street, Joel trying to find it in himself to tell her those same words back. 

While Joel and Emily told each other most things, the Miller’s home life was kept a secret to the outside world, only a few details being revealed. In truth, the reason Joel never left Tommy alone with their father was because of the disaster that happened with his mother. From then on, Joel took on the protective role over Tommy and refused to let anything happen to the 14 year old. 

Joel busied himself by collecting the takeout containers and bottles of beer that had piled up since his dad’s return last night and him leaving while the boys were at school. Joel wasn’t much of a chef but his mother had taught him enough of the basics to be able to keep him and Tommy alive and fed, Joel having given up on trying to give his father anything other than a new bottle of beer. 

“Joel! We goin’ to Emily’s place again?” Tommy yelled through the house as he opened the door. “Joel?!” Joel snapped out of his daydream and turned to face his little brother. 

“Sorry bud. Yeah, get a change of clothes and your toothbrush and you can head over. I’ll finish cleanin’ up his mess and then I’ll follow you.” Joel nodded at Tommy, pushing his head jokingly. “Maybe we can get Carol to trim these locks of yours.” 

“Not a chance, man. The ladies love it!” Tommy cried, moving from his brother’s attacks on his hair. 

“Ah, the intelligent ladies of the 9th grade.” Joel mocked and Tommy rolled his eyes, shoving Joel with his shoulder as he walked to his room to pack a bag. “Let Em know I’ll be over as soon as I can.” He reminded Tommy as the boy set off out of the door. 

“You know that she’ll be over to help as soon as she sees me turn up on my own.” Tommy replied and Joel chuckled to himself, wiping the puddle of alcohol that had spilled by the couch. Joel often found himself working as a maid in his own house, Tommy doing his best to help out whenever he wasn’t getting distracted by a new comic book his friends had let him borrow. 

“What did I tell you about leavin’ that to your dad?” Emily scolded as she walked in the door and Joel laughed, dropping the rag onto the counter. “He expects it now so he’s never gonna try and clean it up himself.” 

“I’d rather not come home to maggots in takeout boxes, I’ll be completely honest.” Joel quipped and Emily huffed, walking into Joel’s room and shoving some of his clothes into a bag. Joel watched as she picked up a white shirt of his that had been stained a reddish colour. “I put Tommy’s jersey in and it stained all the white stuff.” Joel answered the unspoken question and Emily frowned. 

“I liked this shirt.” She mourned the loss of her favourite shirt by holding it up and catching a whiff of the laundry detergent Joel used to clean his clothes. 

“Correction, you like stealin’ it any time I come over.” Joel teased and Emily rolled her eyes. “Take it, I sorta managed to shrink it too. There are a few others you can take, may as well go to a better home, right?” 

“You just like seeing me in your clothes.” Joel nodded and Emily smiled, shoving a flannel and a clean pair of jeans in the bag as well as another pair of underwear. 

“You expectin’ me to sleep buck naked, sweet cheeks?” Joel asked, reaching into his drawers to pull out a pair of sweatpants. 

“No but you always sleep in your boxers anyway so I don’t see the issue. Free up baggage space for the snacks I will force you to go and get me later, duh.” She stated and Joel chuckled, shoving the sweats into the bag and slinging it over his shoulder. When the pair arrived at Emily’s house, Tommy was standing at the stove, stirring whatever it was that Carol was making, trying his best to be helpful. “Joel, how are you honey?” Carol attacked him with a tight squeeze and a dozen kisses to the cheek. 

“I’m doin’ good thank you, Carol. Is Jerry still at work?” Joel asked, receiving a knowing look for Emily’s mother as he set his bag at the bottom of the stairs, ready to take up to the spare room later that night. The small talk continued for a while before Emily took Joel’s hand and dragged him up the stairs, closing her bedroom door behind them. Her lips were pressed against his and he grinned, holding her hip with his free hand. “Christ, baby. How long you been keepin’ that to yourself?” He teased, resting his forehead against hers. 

“Still don’t understand why we can’t just go with it, it’s not like anybody really cares what we’re up to, Joel. Nobody would bother us. We could at least tell Tommy.” She whispered before he leaned down and kissed her again. Footsteps on the stairs brought them out of their bubble and the pair pulled away from each other, a knock on the door making Joel walk to the other side of the room and make himself look busy. 

“Em, your father’s home and dinner is almost done.” Carol said through the wood of the door and Joel smiled, nodding at her to open the door. Carol’s face appeared as the door swung open and she smirked. “Ok, lovebirds, downstairs or I out your asses.” She threatened and Joel gasped, his hand flying to his chest as he feigned distress. 

“You wouldn’t.” Emily threw a shoe at him and he laughed, walking over to her and kissing her temple. “I’m kidding, darlin’. Come on before your dad kills me.” Your mother had known about the two of you for a while after you had failed at sneaking Joel out one day during junior year, the anniversary of his mother’s death leaving him needing a little comfort. Since then, she had always covered for the pair of you, accepting Joel into the family officially, and surprising you with a box of condoms which you threw at Joel’s head the next time he entered through your bedroom window. 

“What the fuck? That the greeting I’m getting now?” He groaned, rubbing the spot on his head where the corner of the box had hit. 

“You asshole. Because of your clumsy ass, my mother has taken it upon herself to provide us with condoms and a daily reminder that she doesn’t want any grandbabies just yet.” Joel chuckled, looking at the box and pressing a kiss to Emily’s forehead. 

“I’ll have to tell her thank you, been meaning to buy some more. Goin’ through ‘em like crazy, sweet cheeks.” He whispered, pressing a kiss under her ear and she gasped, pushing him back. “Hey, at least she ain’t threatenin’ to chop my dick off. Would make the experience really borin’ for the both of us.” He huffed and she just rolled her eyes. 

“Joel Miller, you say nothing to my mother about the condoms or I won’t give you a damn reason to use them.” She hissed and he pouted, throwing the box into Emily’s bedside table with a smirk. 

Joel and Emily set the table while Tommy helped Carol carry out the plates, placing one in front of each seat. Emily sat across from Joel, Tommy sitting next to Joel while Jerry sat at the head of the table, Carol sitting beside Emily. “So kids, coming closer to winter break. Joel, Tommy, any plans?” Tommy tensed beside Joel, who shook his head. 

“I’ll pick up a few more shifts at the garage, save up for my own truck. Tommy is going to a festival somewhere for a few days, which week?” Joel asked, nudging Tommy with his knee, shooting him a questioning look and Tommy nodded, glad the topic had moved on. 

“First weekend in.” Tommy commented and Jerry, Carol and Emily nodded, Emily’s legs tangling with Joel’s underneath the table. 

Once everyone had finished their meals, Joel and Emily offered to clean up while her father went to shower and her mother and Tommy made themselves busy around the house, Tommy flicking through some magazine he’d brought with him. “What was all that about?” Emily asked as she handed Joel another plate to dry and put away. 

“All what?” Joel asked, sending her a confused glance. 

“Tommy losin’ his voice. That never happens.”

“Ma used to take us out a lot in the winter break to my Aunt’s cabin and to markets so I guess it’s just become a soft spot, that’s all.” Joel reassured, kissing his girlfriend’s temple. “It’s cute that you worry ‘bout him but I promise that he’s ok.” Emily nodded and Joel smiled, putting away the last of the dishes before he was being dragged into the living room to watch a movie with Emily and Tommy, her parents heading upstairs and calling it a night. 

“When are you two gonna hurry up and fuckin make out?” Tommy muttered after watching the two of them throw popcorn at each other for 10 minutes, a handful hitting him every so often. 

“Hey, watch your damn language.” Joel scolded and Tommy rolled his eyes, throwing up a middle finger towards Joel who took another sip of his beer. “Ain’t it past your bedtime anyway?” Joel grumbled, the distance between him and Emily making him irritable. 

“You just want me to leave so you can cuddle your girlfriend, fine. You guys think you’re bein’ so sneaky but I’ve know for ages.” Tommy teased and Joel flipped him off. “I’m surprised you don’t remember actually. I’d snuck in after leavin’ Andy’s a little earlier than expected and you two were fuckin’ bare ass in his bed. Didn’t take a genius to figure it out.” Tommy shrugged and Joel and Emily blushed, Joel throwing a pillow at his brother and shooing him upstairs. “Fine, don’t answer me but for the love of God, if you ever fuck in his bed, put a pillow behind the headboard. Hearin’ dads headboard is disgusting but yours?!” Tommy gagged and Joel snickered, Emily pushing her feet into his ribs. 

“G’night Tommy.” Joel muttered as Tommy made his way upstairs. 

“Don’t be too loud.” 

“Shut it, Tarzan. Go to sleep while your brother gets the best-.” Tommy ran up the stairs, not wanting to hear the rest of her sentence, and Joel and Emily burst into a fit of silenced giggles, not wanting to wake up her parents. 

“You’re cruel, darlin’.” Joel muttered, letting Emily curl into his side and she smiled, pressing a kiss to his shirt covered chest. “C’mon, I’ll take ya up to bed before you start droolin’.” He teased, pressing a few gentle kisses to the crown of her head and her cheeks before, liting her into his arms, a giggle escaping her lips. 

“Jesus, Joel. A little warnin’ next time.” She complained and Joel smirked, using his elbow to push the handle down on her door and throwing her on the bed, dropping down beside her. 

“You usually love it when I take you by surprise. Oh, Joel. More, baby, move.” He pitched his voice a little higher and threw his head back, Emily swatting at his chest. 

“Was gonna blow you tonight but I’m rethinking my plan.” Joel scoffed and raised his eyebrows, calling bullshit. 

“You wouldn’t risk it with your parents bein’ home and my brother in the room next door. ‘Sides, I’m expected to be seen on the couch in the mornin’ when your dad leaves for work and if he finds me fuckin’ blissed out in your bed, I’m dead.” Joel finished his rant with a kiss to her lips and then stood, making his way towards the door. 

“You could stay. Pops is working the night shift tomorrow so he’ll probably lay in until noon. He doesn’t normally look in anyway, not until he knows I’m up and changed. Nothin’ more than an innocent snugglin’ and smoochin’, right?” Joel chuckled, kissing her again and laying back down next to her. 

“A lil’ snuggle an’ smooch ain’t never done us any harm before. Fine, but I ain’t takin’ my shirt off. He’d come to conclusions.” Joel complained, changing his jeans for the sweatpants he had thrown into his bag but taking his shirt off anyway after receiving multiple kisses across his chest and those pleading eyes that he could never say no to. “You know, my dad’s goin’ away with his fishing buddies next weekend, they’ll probably spend the entire trip in a bar but it means I’ve got a free house. It falls on a weekend where Tommy is going to his friends for a football game so we could rent a few movies, get a few drinks and just kickback for a few nights if you’re feelin’ up to it.” 

Emily just smiled, settling against his chest with a content hum. “Lemme think about it and I’ll let you know.” She replied through a yawn and Joel smiled, pressing his lips to her temple and rubbing his thumb over her jaw. 

“Get some sleep, sweet cheeks. We’ll talk about it tomorrow.” He assured, settling down next to her and pulling the duvet up to her chin. 

“G’night cowboy. I love you.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Don't forget to like and reblog if you enjoyed!

[shutupdevvie]

ok so some people have been doing their little mushy end of dig/end of tbagg thing so here i am because i can never pass up the opportunity to be sappy. also this is gonna be long af and i honestly don't expect anyone to read it but i wanna write it so i'm going to.

dig allentown was so many firsts for me. it was my first greta show. my first show ever on the floor. my first time waiting for wristbands. my first time traveling for a show. my first time going on a trip with my best friend completely on our own. what i'm trying to say is that allentown meant a lot to me and it meant a lot that i had tay (who literally will not see this post but i'm gonna say it anyway) with me even though she didn't really care to see them very much. she still stressed with me for MONTHS over this show and sat with me for wristbands and gave me support when i needed it at the show. not only was allentown so important for me, but it was also just such a great show. the setlist was fucking amazing. i don't think i will ever get over it or figure out why they played that setlist in allentown of all places but whatever the reason, i am grateful.

then we have atlantic city. ac was very much an unexpected experience for me. i had plans with other people for months that fell through and at the last minute, tal offered me a place in her room, and i am so glad i took it. spending that weekend in ac with tal and lexi and buffy was something so extremely out of my comfort zone. i had never met any of them before yet i was committing myself to staying with them. i was stressed as fuck but i was so tired of everyone being so surprised that i was willing to do something like this that i forced myself to get over it and have a good time. i think they will all admit that i still didn't talk very much and that may not have given off the best impression but ac was one of the best weekends of my life and i forever am grateful to them for making it as great as it was. spending all night in the hostage room together. watching tal crumble after seeing sam in the hallway (sorry tal but i couldn't NOT mention it in my favorite memories). doing prayer circles together in hopes of having a good show. getting second row, barbs, and stardust chords for night two (plus my rose that i will always cherish). and we also have to mention learning the rival sons claps because that is still one of my absolute favorite memories. anywho ac was also very special to me and it brought me closer to some of my favorite people.

and finally to the battle at garden's gate. tbagg is the reason i'm here right now. "here right now' meaning a) alive, b) on tumblr writing a sappy post, and c) a greta van fleet van just in general. this album and this band has changed my life so so much more than i ever could have possibly guessed. without this album, there would be so many wonderful people that i would never have had the chance to talk to and connect with and i would never be listening to the music that i do now. tbagg was a life-changing album for me in so many different ways, and i am so glad that i found it, especially when i did. there are times that i still feel a little alone in the universe, but then i post some bullshit about josh kiszka and somebody halfway across the world will respond and i'll remember that, maybe i'm not so alone after all.

anywho i guess the tldr is: i love greta van fleet. allentown and ac changed my life and so did tbagg overall. i love @streamsofstardust and @jakewhorecore and @artificialbarbarians for making ac so great and for being some of my favorite people. and i love all of you. also want to say that i love @highdefkiszka because she's like my bff and i would never have met her without these stupid fuckers ! to a new chapter and i'm sorry this is so long and so gushy and everything, i can't help it :))

[sunatoru]

NO WAIT I'M STILL HERE— AJHDJSAJS SORRY FOR BEING SO LATE I'VE BEEN DISTRACTED 😭

BUT THIS CHAPTER MAN DO I FEEL SATISFIED LIKE YUUJI I'M SORRY BUT YOU DESERVED EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED TO YOU IN THAT MOMENT, Imagine begging for your life after threatening that of an innocent soul like sir, you have no room— not to mention the way he crumbled the SECOND he heard the singing was *CHEF'S KISS* I COULD NOT HAVE ASKED FOR A BETTER CONCLUSION AND ENDING FOR A CHARACTER LIKE PIRATE TERU AND HIS CREW

THEN WE HAVE THE SISTERS COMING IN SPEARS OUT, VOICES READY, MELODY PLANNED OUT FOR THIS RESCUE MISSION HELL YEAH! How they literally tell him straight up that "Bro we fuckin hate your guts for what you did to our sister but we can't throw you away bc you know where she is so get to it errand boy" 👌 and the way the started criticizing Y/N's taste in men 💀 they really wanna hammer it in to him that *no we don't like you. At all.* but I'm so glad they still care abt Y/N so much despite her probably almost starting an inter-merwar bc of some guy named rintarou 😭

Y/N MY SWEET SIREN LADY YOU ARE FREE NOW, FREE TO FIND ANOTHER MAN LIKE PLEASE LEARN FROM YOUR MISTAKES AND FISH OUT THOSE RED FLAGS BEFORE THEY HURT YOU AGAIN </3 BUT I'M SO HAPPY SHE'S OK NOW AND HER TAIL IS ON IT'S WAY TO BECOMING NORMAL AGAIN AHSHDHAJSHSHAJAH Siren Y/N learned a LOT about humanity during her captive days and they were NOT great like at ALL (ok maybe except for that weird healer lady) BUT I hope she would still be willing to give humans a chance because she needs to know that the rest of us (who aren't pirates, freak circus owners, corrupt zoo owners, yadda yadda yadda) aren't that bad, yk specifically the human me ;) we can be besties Y/N don't worry, I'll kick the shins of everyone out to hurt you <33333

AND FINALLY RINTAROU FUCKING SUNA..... you did pretty good, yeah I still hate your guts for being a SELFISH SEA TURD but at least you acknowledge that what you did was fucked up and tried to make it right even if it is going to stain your conscious and life records forever, I WILL SAY I'm impressed at how much he made me un-hate him, I mean he's still like the worst but yk less worst and maybe yeah, the punishment of him being banished to the human world forever and never being able to go back to the ocean is k i n d a s a d, cause I'm WEAK to tropes where it's like the last you'll be able to do or see something so that explains the crack in my heart rn :" But goddamn, he learned his lesson and accepted it with grief and regret *pat pat* you did well and I begrudgingly hope for your redemption and rebirth as a character

Yk, maybe the epilogue would end with them just seeing each other one day after years and being like "Hey" "Hey" and asking how they've been, then revealing how they've got their own lives both in the ocean and on land.... I mean it could also go the route where they try to make it work but I feel like that would take one long epilogue to explain 😅 but I really look forward to what conclusion their stories will reach, whether they fall in love correctly this time or learn from their mistakes and become better people respectively, I really want to say that you have made an *AMAZING* story of two people with similar dreams yet different ways of fulfilling them, Y/N simply wanted to run away and never look back with him but Rin wanted to have his freedom set in stone no matter what it took even if it meant having to sacrifice someone he was supposed to care for

Man, this conclusion is making me EMOTIONAL 😭 but I want you to know that even if it doesn't seem like there wasn't a lot of hype for this series, I'm glad I got to be part of the hype that was there :D I'm so glad I was one of the reasons you kept going strong with this series till the end :) I'll be patiently waiting for that epilogue so go at your pace! (Also, you are one of the reasons I decided to start writing on tumblr so thanks for being inspiring with this series <333)

HAISHWOSB HIHIIII YOUR REACTIONS MAKE ME SO HAPPY TEHEHEH

HAHSHAHA ERRAND BOY😭

i’m glad i was able to make you un-hate suna, he does deeply regret what happened and i hope one day i’ll be able to revisit this series and explore his grief more! spin-off series where suna lives eternity as a human and watches humanity evolve??? 🤭🤭 jokes jokes (possibly)

“i really want to say that you have made an *AMAZING* story of two people with similar dreams yet different ways of fulfilling them.” STOP YOURE ACTUALLY GONNA MAKE ME CRY WTF 😭😭😭that’s so sweet of you i’m skdhwidnwk i really appreciate how much you looked into this story!!

IM SO GLAD YOU WERE PART OF THE HYPE TOO, the group of people who reblogged and sent asks or commented really helped carry this series and my motivation to finish it. i’m excited to write more for you guys and i hope i can do better with my next series :,>

ALSO WTF HELLO PLS DROP YOUR WRITING BLOG I WILL FOLLOW YOU AND HYPE UP YOUR POSTS THATS SOA WIDHOWBDWO,, MEEEE??? I AM ONE OF THE READONS YOU STARTED WRITING, i am fr so honoured oh my God 🫣🫂🫂🫂

[alabastetwrites]

A Psychopomp's Guide to Surviving the Afterlife

Chapter 1: Trouble in Paradise

"Hello group C-38," said a strange humanoid figure dressed in a flowing angelic robe and matching bright green sports visor and fanny pack. "My name is Stelcat, and I will be your psychopomp for today"

Twenty three miscellaneous people looked around at each other, at the white void they found themselves in, then to the flickering, shadowy figure that had addressed them. "Okay everybody, before we start on the tour, let's go over some FAQs.

"Am I dead? Yes.

"Where am I? You are now in the realm of the beyond, the vale of the hereafter, et cetera et cetera.

"Why can't I remember my loved ones/key life events/name? You will need some time to adjust to not having a body and existing purely as sense-experience. While this happens, you might have difficulty discerning between dreams and memories and fantasies."

Some starting crying. Some got loud, started shouting. A few just stood dumbfounded.

"Ugh, this always happens," Stelcat muttered to themself. "Hey, hey, don't freak out! Sure, your time on Earth has come to its irreversible end and you've been torn away from your friends and family and any plans or projects you were working on will forever go unfinished, but you have an eternity of afterlife to look forward to!"

This didn't do much to reassure the crowd.

"Come on, everyone, we've got places to be. Now, who's excited to have their life choices judged? Can I hear an 'I'm ready!' from you all?"

The people who were freaking out seemed to calm down, more in spite of the psychopomp than because of them. Perhaps the sheer bizzareness of the situation setting in distracted the recently departed from their grief.

"If you'd all just follow behind me, hopefully none of you get lost. If you look up ahead, you should be able to see the door to the throne room of the afterlife."

As C-38 approached, they saw another group by the great door.

"Hey Stel!"

"Hi Ten. Ok 38-ers, this is Tencat who's guiding group C-35. They're going to go in first and each of them will be judged to see how well they've done in their life."

Tencat pushed the door open and let their group through. After the last soul had entered, they followed in after. The door let out a loud thud as it shut behind the group.

"Well, while we're waiting, how about you get to know each other a bit? It might be a bit hard given that most of your memories will be gone. If it helps, each of you all lived in the same area of the city and all died at around the same time. Who knows, you might have seen each other in the streets without realising that you'd end up here together!"

Cassie Chalmers looked around at the unfortunate people she was surrounded by. Her eyes studied each face; her mind strained to match them to anything. Any recognition would satisfy her: a barista who took her coffee order, a bus driver who'd take her to college, a particularly notable passerby, but none of the people before her rang any bells. She came to a young man that she knows but can't place from where. He looks a couple years younger than her, maybe 18 or 19. Maybe she'd seen him around campus.

While she was lost in thought, the door was pulled ajar again and Tencat poked their head out. "Hey Stel, kinda urgent, come look at this."

"Uh.. ok guys, just wait here while I help Tencat out, I won't be too long"

With that, Stelcat too disappeared into the throne room, leaving Cassie and the rest outside. She considered approaching the familiar face, but something about the situation made it feel inappropriate to make conversation.

She felt relieved when the two returned.

Stelcat looked sheepish. Tencat looked on edge.

Stel stepped forward and addressed the unsettled crowd. "Uh, the throne is empty."

Ten had a grin that was somewhere between nervousness and sadistic pleasure. "If you hurry now, you might be able to sneak into heaven while nobody's looking."

[sakurachan7734]

A mouse and a lizard

Chapter 6: just kiss me already dummy

Slight s3xual content 

The next day at school

Kim: hay mary how long have you known Sally for? 

Mary: since middle school why?

Kim: well I am planning on telling her my feelings and I want to know what she likes

Marcy: well I do know that she likes long walks

Kim: ok dose she like flowers?

Mary: yes she absolutely loves tulips

Kim: tulips ok dose she like any candy?

Mary: yes and no she really likes mochi, but other than that she doesn’t really like candy or anything too sweet 

Kim: ok Is there a store that sells that? 

Mary: I know that store mall that sells Japanese snacks does 

Kim: ok good

Sally: hay Kim where were you yesterday?

Kim: oh I wasn’t feeling good so I stayed home

Sally: ok do you still feel sick?

Kim: no

Sally: ok can you meet me in the library after school?

Kim: yes I can

Sally: good * walks away*

Kim: oh my god she is so hot

Mary: you want to get her in the sheets hm?

Kim:* blush’s* WHAT?! No!!

Mary: yea sureee

Kim:* blushing* shut up

Mary: anyway try complimenting Sally throughout the day

Kim: what kind of compliments?

Mary: nice ones and maybe slip in a few ones about how sexy you think she is and nearly every girl I’ve seen her take liking to has had some big muscle so maybe show off yours if you have a chance 

Kim: if I get punched in the face if I try this stuff you’re telling me I’m blaming you

Mary: fair i’m definitely not the best person to come to for dating advice 

Kim: aren’t you secretly a succubus? 

Mary: shh don’t say out loud! But yes, that doesn’t mean I know what I’m talking about

Kim: ok I will let you know how it goes 

At lunch Sally decides to take a nap for a little bit she didn’t get much sleep last night but dream is different this time she is standing in front of two figures that look like her parents

Sally: mom, dad?

Angelina: hi my little princess

Zach: how was your life been since the incident?

Sally: well…. as you can see a bunch has changed about me I gotta a haircut

Angelina: sally dear if you’re trying to skip over the fact that you are now a girl we aren’t here to yell at you because of that

Zach:we are proud of you that you were able to realize who you are before you became an adult and but you didn’t try to push it down and try to say that you’re lying to yourself

Sally: really?

Angelina: yes we still love you, you were once a adorable little boy and now you’re a gorgeous woman 

Sally: thanks mom

Zach: and we are very happy that you were able to move on from what happened and you were able to find someone who makes those memories go away even if for a little bit

Sally: yea me too I try not to let it take over my mind because i know that would only slow me down

Angelina: that’s good we are proud of you sweetheart

Kim: sally?!

Sally:* wakes up* ah!

Kim: sorry didn’t mean to scare you

Sally: it’s fine do you need anything?

Kim: no I just wanted to say that you look very nice today and those jeans really highlight your curves

Sally:* chuckles* aww thanks 

Kim: and that shirt really suits you

Sally: thanks is this why you came up here?

Kim: kinda and the makeup you are wearing looks cute

Sally: thanks it took me forever eyeliner is hard

Kim: why do you want to meet me in the library?

Sally: I want to ask you something private

Kim: ok that lipstick shade looks great on you

Sally: thanks this one is my favorite but it would look better as kiss marks all over those muscles

Kim:* mind* oh my god I think she knows

Sally: You want to see how it will look and your cute face?

Kim:* blushing* maybe later

Sally: alright

The bell rings

Kim: we’ll see you later

A few hours later the school day ends and Kim goes to the library

Kim: hay Sally I’m here

Sally: hi Kim come over here

Kim:* walks over to sally* yes?

Sally: I know you love me

Kim: what?! No I don’t!

Sally: don’t lie to me Kim I see the way your eyes wonder around my body and I see that you act differently when you are around me and how you talk to me

Kim:…..ok you got me…..I do like you

Sally: kiss me then

Kim:* blushing* w-what?

Sally:*pulls Kim close* kiss me dummy

Kim pov

Without warning sally pulled me in and kissed me and it was a passionate kiss I didn’t know how to react so I kissed her back it went on for a few minutes her lips are soft I feel her arms wrap around my waist then I feel her pull away

Sally: sorry about that

Kim: it’s fine I liked it does that mean we are?

Sally: yes you are my girlfriend

After Kim and Sally are done in the library they both go home

John: so how was school Kim?

Kim: great! I got a girlfriend!

John: really who?

Kim: it is Sally!

John: that’s great I am happy for you!

Sally makes it back to her aunt house to call her

Sally: come on pick up

Linda:* answers* yes Sally? Can you make it quick have a short break

Sally: well I have a girlfriend! 

Linda: really who?

Sally: it’s Kim!

Linda: that girl you met at the hospital?

Sally: yes!

Linda: that is great I’m glad you are happy

End of story





[fairydustedtheory]

Searching Every Lonely Place

🌨 Complete. Chapter 12/12 (70.2k)

Summary: Stiles is a Winter Spark -whatever that means- living a solitary life in the forest. It could have been a quiet life, except for that one part... there are wolves in these woods and for all Stiles would love to ignore them and keep to himself, well, there's this part of him that was meant for more.

[inklore]

break the chains

prev chapter | series masterlist

premise: it’s been a month of spending your summer days with eddie. a month that is closer to coming to an end. the feelings that have grown between the two of you within those days meaning a lot more to you than you want them to.

pairing: eddie munson x richgirl!reader

word count: 6.6k

warnings: eighteen+ content, quick mentions of oral sex, come eating, weed mention, time jump, anxiety and panic attacks, blackmail, angst angst angst, fluff in the beginning to even it out tho, hickeys, mention of doing spicy things in public (fingering), trauma and emotional abuse at the hands of shit parents, diet culture.

etc: ok so like this chapter actually fucking killed me to write, like it was all over the place and just angsty and wow can these two get a happy ending yet my godddd. but i kept thinking about this little fluff piece i wrote for them and how it happened days before the events of this chapter and it made all of this hurt even more.

i do not give anyone permission to translate or repost my work, please be respectful — if you enjoyed please comment or reblog!

The Dio song from one of the many mixtapes that Eddie has generously gifted you over the last month—“to enlighten your musical taste buds” he had told you as he handed you two of them, then a third the week after that—plays loud enough that you’re surprised the neighbors have yet to complain.

Your parents had ditched you; was it still considered ditching when you refused to go when your father would only ask out of pity from your mother not asking you? Escaping to their summer cabin with some friends for the weekend, leaving you home alone and blissed about it.

The three of you living like disgruntled roommates as you tried to never be home when they were. Them never asking you where you were, who you were with, what time you came home or left the house.

You’re sure if you dig deep enough it makes you sad to know no one truly cares about your well being. That they probably would only notice you’ve disappeared once they realized you weren’t cashing your monthly check.

But avoidance of feelings is bliss and while your parents weren’t taking up space in your childhood home you were going to make the most of it.

Which is why you’re sat at your bedroom window waiting to see that old rusted van come down the road, sticking out like a sore thumb, completely out of place with the large statured homes around it—and the barley scraping the owners salary, cars sitting in the driveway.

When you had called Eddie earlier, once your parents took that first step out of the door and you were finally rid of them. You had picked up the phone and with little to no convincing he was agreeing to come over.

“What do I get out of it?”

“To see the inside of my castle.” You teased.

“Is that an innuendo?”

You scoffed, “you wish, Munson.”

“Oh yes, many a’wasted stars have been used for wishes on you, my fare lady.”

You roll your eyes, that cheesy smile on your lips when you say, “are you coming over or not?” You wait a few seconds, a minute, what feels like forever as your heart beats in your chest, “I miss you, or whatever, just come over!”

He’s chuckling into the receiver, you can hear his loud footsteps throughout his trailer. “I’ll be there, princess.”

After you've hung up you feel a tinge of embarrassment, don’t know why you said that. Went and told him you missed him like you haven’t spent the last month spending nothing but time with him. Getting high. Making out. Sucking him off. Him returning the favor.

The two of you had to take a week respite because your lips had felt so chapped from how often you found yourself in a lip-lock with him, once you were done puffing and passing on the never ending supply of weed he had.

And within that week you may have warded off kissing, but that didn’t mean Eddie stopped touching you. Or returning the favor that felt more like something else than a favor.

When the two of you had walked in high as a kite to see a late showing of Pretty in Pink, a movie neither of you wanted to see but it had been the only thing showing, and had told Eddie it was his turn to see how the other half lived.

“The other half goes to see Pretty in Pink?”

“Yes! All of my friends love Molly Ringwald.”

“Therefore every person with a trust fund wastes their daddies hard earned money for tickets to this snooze fest?”

“Munson,” you had fake whined. “You’re killing my high right now, all I want to do is go watch a movie and eat some really bad-for-me popcorn, okay?” You held your hand out as the two of you stood in front of the theatre in the town over. A theatre that looked too fancy for Hawkins residences, let alone the inebriated like of you—not to mention it was the only theatre open right now and that you were sure of wouldn’t be housing any of your so called friends, or people who would think twice to see you and Eddie walking hand in hand into the theatre as you dragged his grumbling form along.

And what you had expected to happen while the two of you sat in your seats as the movie played—sharing the popcorn, banter, more complaining from Eddie that would be better than the movie because you’d get to hear his laugh and nothing beat that nowadays—did not happen.

Instead his lips were close to the shell of your ear, his hot breath making goosebumps prick your skin as he whispered in your ear. His fingers bunch up the bottom of your skirt as they move up your thigh, pulling your legs apart so he can push his fingers between them and inside of you.

Your no kissing rule because your lips hurt being dead in the water as your teeth bit into your bottom lip to stop yourself from moaning—trying not to let the other patrons know that the boy beside you was making you come on his fingers.

Eddie Munson was full of surprises.

And so were you the day you had found yourself at the local bookstore, Lord of The Rings in hand, and looking completely out of place. And maybe you had always meant to read it because you’d heard in passing that it was good, you wouldn’t consider yourself a person too interested in reading. Your mother had always said being too smart wasn’t something a man wanted, but being too stupid would land you a shitty one.

You had been made to fall somewhere in the middle. Not hating or loving having a book in your hand.

But hearing Eddie talk about it one night as the two of you laid high and spent on his couch, your heads touching as he lay at one end and you the other. His fingers dancing in the air as he spoke about the book, the world building, the characters. How he made them come to life and you could barely understand a word he was saying—how it was filled with passion, something that went into the same sentence as Eddie Munson perfectly, as peanut butter did jelly; it just made sense.

It had made you realize you’ve never heard anyone talk about the things they liked, loved, like he did.

Your parents barely touched each other let alone spoke of passion about their love. Nor did your ex with anything he spoke about, or your so called friends; unless it was in malice by putting someone else down.

Just as you were learning to roll the perfect joint, and the world of Tolkien; the more time you spent with Eddie the more you realized you’ve never smiled this much in your entire life. Or enjoyed your days in this shit town more than you have in the last month, and you loved it.

There had been fear with that realization. There still was fear. Fear of how long it was going to last. Fear of having to go back to your real life, the reality of it, in less than a month's time. How you would have to say goodbye to Eddie eventually.

Because this was just summer fun. A fling. A…whatever to pass the time while you were at home. It held no substance. Was the behavior of a silly girl with a crush your mother would say if she knew.

But you didn’t have a crush on Eddie and going back to your life before this, before him, wouldn’t be as bad as your chest made you feel each time you thought about it.

It’s not like the two of you were serious. You were friends who got high together and made each other come. That’s all. Nothing more. Nothing less.

Or so that was your internal mantra every night Eddie brought you home, every night you had to resist the urge to ask him to stay at his place, to burrow your way into his arms forever so you wouldn’t have to leave his side and go back to your castle where you were unwanted.

Because while the two of you may have only shared kisses, joints, and bodily fluids—at least in those moments spent together, laughing, teasing, talking about life, you had felt like you mattered. That you weren’t just being used for someone else’s benefit. A robot in the machine of the sad pathetic life of a rich girl who had everything but hated it all. You weren’t a fucking cliché when you were with Eddie.

You were you.

And the summer wasn’t over yet, so when reality came crashing down then you’d worry about it. You’d pack your bags and go back to your life and be fine.

As the mantra goes.

As luck would surprise you, it doesn’t take much effort to sneak Eddie in through your back door; giving him specific instructions to park in the signature location and sneak his way through your yard—without looking like a total creep to any neighbors that could possibly be nosy-ily peeping out of their windows.

When you hear the soft knocks at the door your heart does an annoying leap as you race to swing it open. Trying to hide your amusement as you see him grip his knees as he doubles over trying to catch his breath.

“Your yard is bigger than my trailer, shit.” He fans himself with his ringed fingers dramatically.

“Don’t participate much in gym do you?”

“This body is made for love not torture,” he waves a hand along the front of him.

And yeah, maybe your body feels things from how tousled his hair looks from running, or the way his chest is heaving, the collar of his shirt sitting low enough to give you the perfect view of his necklace —of the tantalizing column of his neck you love to run your teeth along.

And maybe it’s also the way the porch light shines down on the leather of his jacket and dark jeans—always filled with holes—but you’re just now realizing how much you missed him in more ways than one, a way that has a dull throbbing starting between your legs.

You wordlessly grab his wrist, pulling him through the threshold and right to your chest. Your hands finding the warmth of his chest through his jacket as you look up at him with a sly smirk, “maybe you should show me this love you speak of.”

The heel of his sneaker finds the edge of the door swiftly kicking it shut as he leans his face down into your space. “Anything for you, princess.”

While your feelings for certain things—Eddie—may have been morphining and changing into something unexplainable to you; the act of the two of you only keeping your physical relationship strictly oral had not.

If this were any other guy, that you knew, he would have already moved on. Every guy loved blowjobs, loved to cop a good feel of what you were working with. But holding out for sex? When there had been plenty of times for it to happen?

Maybe you had just been seeing the wrong guys. Had let the wrong ones take up space in your life and made you feel inclined to please, to give, but never to take or receive. To do what was expected of you.

And maybe you shouldn’t classify every guy into that bubble of misogyny and insensitivity. Because Eddie was the opposite—so much so that it proves your track record of guys were not the right ones.

It’s not like you were holding out to see his resolve. To see if one night he’d actually act or initiate it. If he did you know you’d gladly do it. Gladly let him, someone worth it, inside of you.

Instead of the usual parasites.

But maybe that’s why you haven’t done it.

Why you’ve stopped yourself from pushing it to the next level. Because Eddie was good. Too good. For you, for the confusing feelings you got the more you spent time with him, for the fact that you were leaving at the end of summer and all of this would probably fade into the background noise of your life and you two would forget about each other and move on.

Deep deep down mixed in between those fuzzy feelings you get every time his fingers brush against yours when you’re walking beside each other, or passing a joint—your heart stopping when he kisses the side of your throat, when he’s between your legs, when he’s actually listening to you talk about things he doesn’t quite get and vice versa—if you fucked Eddie Munson you don’t think you’d be able to leave.

And that scared the shit out of you.

Because it was both incredibly ridiculous and stupid all on the same hand as it was so bitterly-sweet that it fucking hurt your chest to even think about.

So you swallowed it down like every other feeling. You let it pass. Let it drift to that lump in the pit of your stomach where you stored the things you’d never be able to have, obtain, because of who you were.

“Fuck,” Eddie gasps, his chest heaving. As he shoots rope after rope of cum across your chest, the heat from it giving the tops of your breasts a tantilizing burn—your eyes casted up at him as you watch his mouth hang open, adore the bruise you had sucked right below his jaw, love the way his eyes roll back and hips stutter as his fucks his fist, getting out every last drop from the head of his cock.

There’s drool coating your chin, drying and becoming cold in contrast to the rest of the air in the room; the smell of sex, come, and desire filling your childhood bedroom full of a different type of heat than the one outside.

Your throat feels raw and swollen from letting him fuck it, from how deep he had gotten. It brings a sweet smile to your lips remembering how he had asked the first time you told him he could, that he didn’t have to treat your mouth as if it were something fragile, that you would not break because of him–for him was another story.

“Are you sure? This is alright? Shit, that–yeah–fuck okay that feels good.” His cheeks had been a pretty pink, a nervous flush that soon turned into something needy and depraved.

You’d always think Eddie was pretty like this. Pretty in general.

Even if the word was miles off from how he normally looked, his brooding scary stature that most would swear off.

But that was the beauty of you being with him like this; you saw him, in ways no one else had and that meant too much to you.

The pull of the corner of his mouth as he looks down at you, his breath coming back to him, his eyes lazily filled with satisfaction and admiration, has your stomach plummeting into regions of your own need—and other places that are being ignored. How his bottom lip pulls into his mouth as he lets two of his fingers run along your chest, skating across a nipple making your breath hitch as the pad of it gathers the remnants of his come and brings it to your open mouth.

Your lips wrapping around them, tongue swirling around the tips to gather his taste and swallow it down as you suck them clean. Your eyes never leaving his as you do so.

It's crazy how well the two of you have grown to know the other body. What turns you on, what gets you there faster, the words you didn’t know you needed to hear in order to make your orgasm more intense.

There had been brief conversations over joints and a shared six pack. Eddie enclosing to you what he thought about late at night when he fucked his fist, and where your thoughts would lead you when you were all alone in your room with your hand between your thighs. The both of you sharing wants, needs, and things you’ve always wanted to try. The conversation being a pivotal one to you and your insides, the comfortability to talk about such things was something that you'd look at as far fetched if this were two months ago. But now it felt like the simplest thing in the world, easy, special to your used-to-being-closed-off feelings.

What was Eddie Munson doing to you?!

After you’ve cleaned yourself up, Eddie being as gentlemanly as ever as he helps you to your feet, hand in his as he pulls you to your ensuite to set you on the counter and run a wet cloth over your messy chest. A look of precision as he does so. Like a doctor holding a scalpel.

“And there, all perfect once again.” He grins, sets the cloth on the counter as he rights your top. Hands lingering to rest at your hips as he stands between your open legs.

“I think it was perfect the way it was.”

“Ooh,” Eddie leans in to you, mouth centimeters from yours. “Of course you did. Sometimes I forget how much of a depraved sex demon you are.” He snickers as he presses a quick peck to your lips.

Dodging the slap you give to his arm as he moves towards the door to run out of the bathroom as you chase him, hollers and giggles filling your room as he throws a pillow at your head.

“Eddie! Not the pillows my mother will–” another hits you in the face before you can finish your sentence. A shrug of innocence on his face when you scowl at him, a low growl in the back of your throat as you ignore your own words and pick up the small pillows your mother had knitted herself—that were gaudy and ugly but insisted you decorate your room with, as if they were classy and not actually tacky.

The two of you spend the next ten minutes shouting and tossing pillows, and whatever else you can get your hands on, until Eddie wraps his arms around your waist and tackles you to your bed. Your back hitting the plush duvet heavy and hard with his weight over you.

“I didn’t call you over here to wreck my house!”

“You should have been more clear on the phone then,” his cheeky smile has you about to give a playful pat to his cheek but then he’s grabbing your wrists and pulling them over your head.

“You’re cleaning this up!” You grunt as you try to lift yourself from his hold to no avail.

“I think it gave the room some life, it was too..” he makes a face as he looks around your bedroom, a grumble echoing through his chest. “Pink.”

You can’t help but laugh, “pink? That’s the best insult you have, not that it looks like it was decorated by a sixty year old grandmother? Pink?!”

“I was trying to be nice.” He makes a face, tries to hold it, but his laughter seeps through.

“Eddie the chivalrous.”

That soft look of admiration is in his eyes again as he presses down, his chest flush against yours as he moves closer to your mouth with his. “Only for you.”

“I think the press would love to know about this.”

“‘Hawkins Freak actually a decent person, who would have thought’. What a headline.”

Your chest tightens, a small frown washing away your happy expression. But you don’t let it stay, let it stick. Don’t let Eddie see as you use all your strength to pull out one of your wrists from his hold to bring it to the back of his head, fingers splaying in his hair. “I think it’s a perfect headline.”

“If thy majesty approves then who am I to argue?” His smile morphs against your mouth as the two of you kiss. “Now, should we get back to the real reason I’m here?” His brows waggle dramatically as he rolls off of you and onto his side, fingers dipping into his front pocket to pull out a joint.

There’s an array of condiments and chip bags littering your island as you lean over it, chin in your palm as you watch Eddie make his version of nachos. Your throat dry and burning from the joint and the laughter that keeps slipping out from him, your stomach caving in as you try not to grab a handful of shredded cheese and toss it into your mouth.

“Trust me, one bite of these and your fancy smancy country club will be put to shame.” He declares with conviction, points a finger in your direction as he puts the concoction into the microwave and lets the ‘magic happen’ as he says.

“I don’t think they serve nachos there, this is already an unfair fight.”

“I never thought a sentence could hurt me until now.”

You roll your eyes, “they should change your name from freak to dramatic.”

He shakes his head, “doesn’t have the same twang to it.”

“Twang?!” You laugh, covering your mouth with your palm to stop the echoing of your giggles throughout the large kitchen.

Eddie bites back a grin as he watches you lose it, leaning himself on the opposite counter, arms coming to cross over his chest. “What kind of food do they serve to the Royalty anyway?”

Once you’ve given yourself a stomach cramp from laughing too hard and have caught your breath you’re shrugging your shoulders. “I wouldn’t know, I’m only mandated a salad.”

“Mandated?”

You nod, “yeah.” A chuckle slips in between a puff of air, “my mom thinks it's proper for a lady to keep a healthy diet. Therefore what she eats I eat.”

“Always?”

“If I’m accompanying them, yes.”

“I’m guessing no is not in her vocabulary?”

“You’d guess correctly.” You can feel the ill feeling from the conversation bubbling up in the pit of your stomach, that sting of perpetual dread you get when you think or talk about your parents with anyone. As if your body is waiting for the sickening pity that’s going to come from them, you don't need anyone pitying you. Or the ‘you have everything, your parents can’t be that bad’ that was worse than the pity. Like a reprimand of the damage your parents have done to whatever part of your brain that holds your feelings—and traits that make you turn into a decent human being. Both parts have dents and nicks no thanks to them.

But Eddie’s not looking at you with either of those things on the horizon of being spoken. Something that doesn’t surprise you, but does make you chew happily on the skin of your bottom lip.

“And when you’re away?”

“She’d have an aneurysm with all the takeout boxes in my dorm room.” You joke but the thought actually brings you a dark kind of joy, “I should just order a steak the next time I’m forced to play happy family with them.”

“The biggest.”

“Juiciest.”

“You have to get fries!”

“Fries? Forget an aneurysm, it’d be cardiac arrest!”

Eddie’s chuckle, the rise of his still blush tinted cheeks, the way even after having wrestled with you and taken a few pillows to the face his hair still looks perfect—you know, from the smell, but also having seen his bathroom, that he spends way too much money on hairspray—makes those annoying flutters bother your insides again.

When the microwave goes off you can feel your mouth watering from the smell wafting from the nuked chips he pulls out. The cheese melted to them looking burnt and fried, like it’s going to take some effort to separate them. Eddie grabbing a few condiments to scatter across the chips; sour cream, hot sauce.

After he’s done he holds it out in front of him with a smirk, “ready to taste heaven?” You make a face, trying to suppress a smirk of your own at the innuendo that’s dying to come out of you, that has him shaking his head. “Don’t tell me.” He says as he walks past you and heads towards the stairs.

“What?!” You’re laughing as you follow close behind.

As hard and nuked as the nachos looked, as much as you figured—expected—them to taste like something they’d serve you in middle school and call it lunch; they tasted amazing.

And maybe it was how high you were and how you were still rolling off of the sex endorphins, or maybe it was because Eddie had made them and everything he did just felt, tasted, was better. But it was almost obscene how you were hoovering the chips down, sour cream coating your fingers.

Eddie’s fingers looking the same, “told you, can’t get enough, huh?”

“I’m just high.”

“Mhmm and I passed biology.”

You snort, a chip flying across the plate from your fingers to land—sauce free—against his chin and then onto your duvet. “Yes, they’re amazing, we can add Eddie the chef to your resume.”

He makes a show of doing a fake bow as he pops the chip you threw into his mouth.

Your thrown chip leading into the two of you trying to see who can catch one in their mouth on purpose this time. The stains that would surely be present in the wash was sure to give your mother heart palpitations—good.

You couldn’t find an ounce of caring about it, about her, about anything other than this moment. The way Eddie’s missed his fourth chip and it’s landed in his hair, sour cream coating one of his curls. A look of dramatics one his face.

“Unbelievable.”

“It’s just a little sour cream, Munson. You’ll wash!” You tease, trying to hide your laugh by putting a chip in your mouth.

“It’s just three inches away. Aim better!” He mocks back at you as he cleans the white from his brown lock.

“Oh it’s my fault that you can’t catch?”

“I see why cheerleading was your top pick, that’s all I’m saying.” He holds his hands up in defense, the playful grin on his face making you scowl at him.

You don’t think, only react, as you scoop up a dollop of sour cream and toss it at him, it landing on the front of his shirt.

The look of astonishment on his face lasts for half a second before his finger is scooping it back up, jumping across the plate of nachos that crunches under his weight, to tackle your back down onto your mattress and swipe his finger—and the sour cream—against your forehead and hairline.

“Eddie!”

“You started it!”

“My bed!”

“My shirt!”

You let out a frustrated puff of air, look over at the mess on your bed, at the front of his shirt, up at the coolness of the white you can’t see but can feel drying against your skin.

And then up at Eddie the both of you holding stoic faces until you can’t hold back the laughter any longer. Your chests vibrating against each other as you laugh in the crook of each other’s necks. And it’s like it all clicks; something changing in the air, inside of you.

It wouldn’t matter if you fucked Eddie or never fucked him, if things just stayed like this and you never took those next steps, went to that next level: it was going to be hell leaving this behind either way.

This comfortability, these nights spent together, all that’s been shared, that’s been discovered, these feelings..this crush.

It was going to tear you in two no matter the circumstance. No matter the level. You could convince yourself otherwise all you wanted, but your heart knew.

So why should you wait? Why should you continue to hold back?

It was obvious you both wanted each other, that it wouldn’t take much to get to that level. It’s been dangling right there in front of the both of you since the first night you spent together.

Maybe it was time you faced this reality and stopped running from it.

And when Eddie pulls his face from your neck, smile faltering when he sees the serious look on your face, eyes still soft as ever; your choice is made.

Fuck it.

Your palm comes up to his cheek, thumb running across his bottom lip. There’s a need and want thrumming through your body that you hope he can see in your eyes. Hope he can read it through your touch, through your unspoken words—the heavy beating of your heart speaking the syllables you can’t.

You’re positive he knows because he doesn’t say anything just presses his lips to yours. Connecting your mouths in an agreement that you wish you would have settled on weeks earlier.

Eddie’s shirt is the first to go, him balling up the material to clean the gunk from your forehead and hair. A laugh shared between the two of you before your lips reconnect, before your shirt is peeled from your body. His body slotting perfectly between your legs, his hardness pressed to your thigh through his jeans. Your hips gyrating in attempts to ease the ache between your thighs, to get whatever friction you can against him—to feel him.

His lips attaching themselves to the side of your neck, sucking your sensitive flesh into his mouth. Teeth scraping against it causing gasps to fall from your parted lips. Body pushing up into his. Hands in his hair.

You were really going to do this.

Finally going to do this.

You're about to moan his name, about to ask him if he wants this as bad as you, but then the ring of the doorbell from downstairs has the two of you freezing.

Your breath caught in your throat, heart stopped.

Your parents' friends knew better than to call before dropping by. Your mother hating unexpected guests—needing time to put on her fake game face.

And your friends were barely in existence.

“Expecting someone?”

You shake your head, “only you.”

A half smile pulls at Eddie’s lips before he pulls off of you and the two of you right yourselves. His hand comes out to grab your wrist and pull you to him before you reach the door. A deep kiss pressed to your lips from his as he speaks against them, “hurry back.”

It’s a tenderness, on the cusp of being romantic that has you forgetting how to breathe for a second. Almost as if you don’t recognize the boy in front of you.

Until he opens his mouth again, “I really don’t want to clean up this mess myself. Especially when it was your fault.” He grumbles as he motions towards your messy bed.

The moment gone. Lost.

Somehow making it even more special.

“Don’t boss a princess around.” You tease as you slip through your bedroom door, closing it behind you and skipping down the steps. Hoping that maybe it’s just some neighbor kids messing around and you can get back to Eddie, and what you were about to do, quicker.

Conversing with a neighbor or someone you knew was not something you were in the mood to do right now.

But you put on your signature fake smile just in case as you open the door. The mask faltering, your face dropping, heart hanging heavy in your chest when you come face to face with your ex.

While you’re freaking out on the inside the cocky smirk he has on his face is picture perfect.

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” He chuckles under his breath as he doesn’t wait for you to invite him in. Pushing his way past you and into the foyer.

The feelings inside of you quickly mold into aggravation.

“What do you want?” You slam the door, a little too hard. “Why are you here?”

“I can’t come see my girlfriend?”

The laugh you let out is obnoxious and pretentious and lathered in humor and ‘get real’ with a touch of ‘in your dreams’.

“I’m not your girlfriend.” You cross your arms. “I thought the fact that we haven’t spoke, let alone seen each other in two months, and me telling you to fuck off the last time I saw you was enough of a confirmation of the fact.”

“Couples fight.” He shrugs, that smirk still in place. Still making you want to drive your fist into his face.

“We are not a couple!”

“Don’t be childish.”

It sounds like your mother. It’s her voice that you hear when he says it. It’s the same red rage you see when she says.

You open your mouth to tell him to fuck off, to get out of your house, that it’ll be a cold day in hell before you ever torture yourself with being with him let alone being around him.

But then he’s saying, “Carol said she saw you with that freak Eddie Munson.”

“Don’t call him that.” Your mouth, heart, speaks before you comprehend the words, the meaning of them, the threat that’s bound to follow them. Your chest sinking until you feel like you might get sick. Your body now adding nerves into the mix of your aggravation.

And all you can think to do, the only thing that your mind can compute right now is to deny deny deny. Lie. Do what you’ve been trained to do your whole life.

Ignoring the pang of pain you feel in your gut at your words, “get real.” You scoff, roll your eyes. “Just because I don’t want to be around her bitching doesn’t mean I’m hanging out with the steerage.”

He nods, pressing his lips together in a tight expression that lets you know he’s not buying it.

Can’t bullshit a bullshitter.

“I don’t care what you’ve been up to, who you’ve been hanging with.” He strides to you, putting him too close in your space that it just makes you even more nauseous at the smell of his expensive cologne. His thumb coming up to press into the side of your neck—a hiss leaving your lips, a feeling of childish humiliation washing over you as you realize Eddie must have left a mark from earlier. Your hand comes up to cover it. “Or who you’ve been fucking.” His hands slip into the front pocket of his dress pants, “you’ve had your fun, saw what it’s like to run with the lower class. But now it’s time to come back to reality.”

He presses a chaste kiss to your cheek before he’s moving past you and over to the front door. Opening it and stepping between the threshold. Looking back at you to add, “we’re going to get back together or I’m going to break the news to your parents, let them know their daughter opens her legs for anyone these days.” He gives you a smile before he’s shutting the door behind him and leaving you alone—with your heartbeat pounding in your ears, the aggravation gone, the nerves making it harder to breathe, the threat playing in a loop in your head to the point where it’s only his voice you can hear.

And only your parents faces, the horrific look you know they’ll give you. The screaming in your face you know your mother will do. How she’ll call you ungrateful and tell you how disgusting you are.

Your father will look at you as if you’ve murdered someone. As if you’ve put shame on his name, like they’ll never be able to show their faces in town again. Like you just ruined their lives. Like you’re pathetic, and for what? For falling for the town freak? For spending time with him? For finding someone who actually makes you feel good?

No that’s not allowed and you’re stupid for thinking it could ever be.

“What were you thinking? You stupid girl!” Your mother will yell.

And maybe that’s exactly what you were. A stupid girl.

What were you really thinking spending all this time with Eddie?

Lying to yourself thinking that this would wrap up in a happy little bow. No one finding out.

You were stupid to think so.

When you finally drag yourself up the stairs to your room Eddie is sitting at the edge of your bed, teeth biting at the beds of his nails, knee bouncing.

You notice that he’s cleaned your blanket off. That the music that had been playing isn’t anymore, when did it stop? Did you turn it off? Was it ever on?

You don’t remember. Can’t think.

Your heart feeling like it’s going to burst in your chest.

The look on his face, a look you wished to never see on those features. A look you know you’ve caused.

“Did you-”

“Hear it all? Yeah..yeah.” Eddie stands. Runs his hands down his thighs, taps his finger against his leg as the both of you stand there awkwardly.

The first awkward moment you’ve ever shared.

Once again caused by you.

All of this mess caused by you.

Your fault.

Stupid girl.

“Cats out of the bag now,” he jokes. Tries to give you the smallest of smiles but you don’t return it. Can’t and it makes his face fall as you start to pace.

Your hands shaking. There’s fear and heartache making your blood boil, making your limbs feel weird, making your head spin.

“It’s a good thing you’re not embarrassed to be seen with me or this might be realllll-”

His sentence is cut off, unfinished when your eyes connect. When he sees the look on your face that does the opposite of denying his words. You can’t even open your mouth to save face, to tell him that’s not the case because would that even be true?

The two of have been sneaking around. Have gone out of your way to keep it a secret. You thought it was a mutual agreement that yes, while you weren’t embarrassed to be with him, that it was best that no one knew. That your parents never found out.

It’s not like this was anything. It was nothing. The two of you were just hanging out. It didn’t mean anything.

Your pacing stops as does your breathing when you realize you’ve said those words out loud.

And if the look on Eddie’s face before had hurt the one that he was giving you now was enough to make you want to fall to your knees.

He nods, chuckles weakly under his breath. “The steerage will see himself out. So long, princess.” He says without another glance to you. Without looking back at you, without yelling at you the way you know you deserve right now.

But that wasn’t Eddie.

You weren’t brave and he wasn’t a fighter.

What a match.

You don’t wait to make sure he’s gone before you let out a broken sob, the burning behind your eyes finally coming to the forefront to have hot tears pouring down your face. You can feel your heart shatter in your chest, knowing that the sweet summer you’ve spent alongside Eddie is over.

As is the hope you had held out in your heart that maybe a different life was something you wanted for yourself. That you could tell off your parents. That you could feel something other than dread. That you could actually be yourself with someone.

That maybe these feelings could withstand past the summer and you’d actually be happy to come home on holidays because you’d get to see Eddie.

But maybe these were just more lies you were good at telling. Because look where hope got you, where feelings got you.

Your mother was right.

Girlish feelings only ruined things.

And you’ve gone and ruined everything.

[maedaex2combo]

More Than Pale

Chapter Two: When Feelings Go Unspoken

Post-retcon / Post-sburb

[CH 1] ==>

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Pairings: Dave x Karkat x Reader (GenderNeutral!Reader Human!Reader)

Warnings: Strong language, Alcoholism, Angst.

Word Count: 16.3k (itsmorethistimeimsorry)

Summary: After sobering up and getting your music career up and running again, you reconnect with an old friend from your tour. This causes more than a few issues between you and your two "platonic" best friends. Is it jealousy or is it for your well-being?

A/N: Holy shit I finally finished this chapter LMAO. God this took me forever y'all I'm so sorry. I'm literally in a foreign country right now for study but I'll be damned if I let that stop me (I only let it slow me down significantly). Anyways I was kind of struggling with what direction I wanted to take the story to get the boys to realize their feelings, but this is what I came up with! I hope it's good because I can't keep reading over this monstrosity of a chapter anymore. But we've got a new character and high high tension in this one. Sorry for all the angst! But it'll be worth it in the end ;) Enjoy!

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Lets get into it x2

It’s been a month!

A month of sobriety. A month of working on your new album. A month since the breakdown video, which ended up getting cleared up with both the public and your friends. The dinner with Rose and Kanaya was awkward, you’ll admit, but they actually helped with their advice about staying sober. The picnic with Roxy, Calliope, and Jade was helpful as well and encouraged you to spend more time with your other friends. All in all, you were doing a lot better now! You even wrote one of your songs about your journey towards recovery and self-love so far. In a livestream, you ended up crying at how supportive your fans were. Things were really looking up for you.

The album was maybe about halfway done now. At the moment you’re currently working on your track with Dave as a feature and writer. He’s been having trouble with his own writing, despite all his work being very good, as you continue to tell him. You think he’s just being especially hard on himself since he knows this will be largely produced and listened to by millions. You’ve been patient though, always, for him.

The room is scattered with papers, whole ones and crumpled ones. Really, this was not very eco friendly. You probably could’ve written in a tablet or something. All the tech though was being used for recording, beat making, mixing, etc. There's cords everywhere like a death trap. It’s a mess.

You’re reading over one of the verses for the thousandth time when Dave walks back in again with AJ and a water for you.

“so what do you think?”

“Dave. Every time I tell you it’s perfect! You’re the one who’s nitpicking.”

“yeah but if it’s perfect then why do you keep giving me feedback?”

“Because you insist!!!” You laugh a little at the ridiculousness of the past several hours spent going back and forth like this. You stand up and hand the paper towards him for the last time. “This is it, Dave. This is the final draft. I officially have no more comments.”

“but-“ he starts to protest.

“Nope!”

“ok just-“

“Nuh-uh.”

“dude-“

“No!”

He finally breaks out into a smile. “okay! okay. but just for the last line. I think that-”

“What was that?? I think someone’s calling me, I can’t hear you. One second.” He sighs as you clearly answer a fake phone call. “Hello? Who is it?… Oh my gosh, Barrack Obama???… Wow, such an honor to talk to you sir. To what do I owe the pleasure?-“

“hey. don’t bring him into this.” He says, but there’s still that little amused smirk on his face.

“Oh, what’s that? You read the copy of Dave’s verses I sent you? Thank you, sir! And what’d you think? Oh, wow…. Really??? You think it's THAT bangin?? That’s great! I’ll let him know!” Dave rolls his eyes behind his shades as you pretend to give Americas greatest president your farewells.

“thats not funny. identity theft is a crime (y/n).”

“You know what’s not a crime? Being confident in your bomb ass work. Seriously, why are you so anxious about it? You like your own music, don’t you?”

“of course bro. i write the fucking sickest raps on this planet.”

“Then why-“

“this is different. im not just posting this on my shitty little personal noisecloud account. this track might end up playing in every goddammed mall, cafe, club, and whatever else is on earth c. this is gonna be like- my own official debut. if i put this song out there on your album, its gonna be the whole planets first real look at my music. people are gonna search me up- and if it’s too good then theyll look at my old songs and be all ‘aw shit dude this guy actually sucks’. but if its not good then theyll just assume my music is ass and wont even bother-“

“Dave.” You cut off his rambling suddenly, taking a step closer to him.

“what??” He snaps, clearly stressed, as he whips his head around to look at you.

“It’s good. I promise it’s good.” You take one of his hands in both of yours. “It’s just as good as all your other music. I promise you. Your debut will be a huge success, I already know it. You don't have anything to worry about.”

It’s silent after that. He just stares at you for a while, and the assumed eye contact feels weirdly intimate after a moment passes. From your point of view, you think maybe you went too far. You just wanted to reassure him, but you probably made him uncomfortable. 'I really have to draw the line for this stuff somehow' You think. You start to blush a little out of embarrassment, and quickly let go of his hand to turn away and clear your throat. Not that that makes it any less uncomfortable.

From Dave’s point of view, well, he’s not even quite sure what he’s feeling. He's had these weirdly intimate moments with you ever since he found out you had feelings for him. Did he ever get this flustered around you before that? He cant remember. It’s a good thing that he doesn’t usually blush very much, because it must’ve been unnoticeable to you. He wishes it was unnoticeable to him too, the way his heart started to beat faster when you touched his hand and comforted him, and even faster every second your eyes stayed connected. It felt so nice, it left him speechless long enough for you to think he was uncomfortable. this is weird… this feeling… i have a matesp- boyfriend. so why do i feel-

And then you’re pulling away. And he shakes off the weird emotions he doesn’t want to address as quickly as they came.

“Anyways.” You quickly add onto that comically awkward cough as you make your way back to your own desk with your own writing. “If you want to keep perfecting it, that’s fine. But y'know that one saying… Uhh what was it… Don’t fix what isn’t broken? Right?”

Dave nods. “yeah i guess.” He replies as he goes to sit back down at his desk. Right before he can take a seat, someone knocks on the door of your workroom. You both know who it is of course.

Karkat opens the door before either of you even get to say anything. “HEY. SORRY TO BOTHER YOU TWO WHEN YOU’RE ‘IN THE ZONE’ OR WHATEVER. BUT SOMEONE'S AT THE FRONT DOOR ASKING FOR (Y/N).”

“Huh?” This catches your attention, turning your body in your chair to look at him. “Who is it??”

“NO FUCKING CLUE. HE SAYS YOU KNOW HIM.”

Your heart sinks a little, immediately assuming the worst. “Oh, shit. Is it one of the guys I’ve dated?? Tell them I’m not here!!”

“NO, (Y/N). UNFORTUNATELY FOR ME, I THINK I WOULD RECOGNIZE THEM. IM PRETTY SURE IM SO TRAUMATIZED BY ALL THOSE DATE NIGHTS, THAT THEIR FACES ARE ENGRAVED INTO MY FUCKING THINKPAN FOREVER AGAINST MY WILL. BUT I'VE NEVER SEEN THIS DOUCHE BEFORE.”

Now you’re curious. And apparently your two friends are as well, when they follow you into the hall and quietly peak their head out from behind the stairs to see who the mystery man is.

When you open the door, you need to take a second to get a good look at him. He has curly black wolf-cut hair, and when he takes off his expensive-looking maroon shades, he’s got really well drawn black eyeliner on. You immediately recognize him now that you can get a good look at his face. He was one of your openers on tour! You spent a couple months together and he was really cool from what you can remember. You can’t believe you forgot to keep in touch! Then again, a lot happened for you.

“Rael!!!” Your face lights up and you excitedly pull him into a hug, taking him by a bit of surprise, but his smiles big when he returns the hug.

“(Y/n)! Hey! I missed you, dude!” The two of you pull back, grinning. “How you been? I saw all that stuff that happened last month and got worried. Thought I’d come check on ya!” Karkat and Dave share a confused glance with eachother.

You laugh a little, embarrassed that he had to read/see about that. “Ooohhh yeah… that was crazy! Haha.. But I’m doing a lot better now! I’m working on my next album!”

“I heard! I bet it’s coming along great.” He compliments, putting his hands on his hips. "Your tracks are always groundbreaking."

You blush. “Hahah.. Thanks! But yeah, it is coming along really well." You’re smiling bigger than you have in a while. It feels so good to see another artists from your tour again, brings back good memories, as exhausting as the trip was. There were people who made it worth it. “Would you… like to come in?” You suggest suddenly on a whim.

“Oh, that’s okay! I know you’re busy. I just thought I’d come by and say hello, since I was in the area.”

“Are you sure? I'd love to have you over for a while! Maybe I could show you what I’ve been working on?” You suggest, a little bashful. You haven’t shown anyone but Dave and Karkat your work so far. It’d be good to get another artists opinion as well.

“Hmm…” He takes a second to think, looking off to the side. “Well, alright! Since you insist!” He agrees suddenly, and the two of you laugh, chatting some more as he walks in alongside you into the house. Dave and Karkat go back into the workroom when they notice you coming in.

When you two enter to see them, Rael is the first to speak. “Hey! These must be the god-friends I heard you talk about so much!” He announces, and you blush a little. “Its nice to finally meet you two! The famous Dave Strider! I heard your beats are nice!"

"sup." Dave nods in resonse, his hands in his pockets.

He looks over to Karkat. "And uh… Wait don’t tell me… Kitkat?”

“KARKAT.” He sneers, immediately put off by this guy.

“Oh right! Haha, funky name.” He totally misses the aggravated response. Humans sometimes have a hard time with troll names, but it comes off as xenophobic if they don’t even try or apologize. It’s one of Kar’s many pet peeves. He only didn’t go off on the guy because Dave immediately took his hand behind his leg to calm him down subtly. You laugh a little awkwardly to fill the short, yet thick, following silence.

“and who are you?” Dave asks, melancholy.

"Oh right. Guys this is-"

“Name’s Rael! I’m a friend of (Y/n)’s. We were on tour together!” He cuts you off, but you don't think much of it.

“His music’s really good! I thought he could help us out a little bit. Maybe give us an outside view for editing purposes?” You smile, intentions good, totally forgetting Dave’s thing about privacy and how much he would and does think that's an awful fucking idea.

“im good.” Is his short reply.

“What? Dave!” You immediately retort.

“It’s okay, I can just take a look! I don’t have to give any real criticism if you don’t want it!” Rael offers, but Dave’s cold expression doesn’t budge. There’s a very tense air in the room right now. The silence unfortunately pushes Rael to continue his paragraph. “Hey, I get it man! Some people just can’t take it, I’ve had a lot of friends go off on me for-“

“yeah. really. im good.” Dave reports again, cutting him off in the same tense tone. “you two can knock yourselves out though. think im all written out for today anyways.”

Then he’s grabbing all his writings that he can see and walking out of the room. Karkat follows behind, not without his signature dirty look glaring directly at your friend. The door slams after him.

Yeah. They’re never really elusive or subtle with how they feel, are they? As much as Dave tries to be. This doesn’t surprise you, but you’d be lying if you weren’t a little upset. Also, it was a little bit out of character for Dave to be so cold to someone new. Why was he acting so weird?

“Well then!” You say, clapping your hands together and faking a smile, trying to forget that strange interaction. “Shall we get started then?”

You two spend the next several hours in the workroom. Every laugh from behind the door seems to vibrate throughout the whole house. The intense air followed the two boys into the living room where they’ve been biding their time doing whatever the hell they could think of. Mostly video games. Theres no real one set reason to why the events of today seem to put the two in a bad mood. Karkat of course didn’t like this 'friend' of yours based off first impression, but he doesn’t ever like new people honestly. He’s also just pissed he has to deal with him being in the house for this extended amount of time, even having to see him walk out to use your bathroom once. It was silently pissing him off. Or as silent as he can get, only warranting a few angry outburst rants to Dave saying things like “HOW LONG IS THIS ASSHOLE GONNA STAY IN THERE?” and “HE MIGHT AS WELL FUCKING MOVE IN AT THIS POINT.”

Dave on the other hand didn’t really have a problem with the guy, other than the way he greeted Kar earlier, which also set a bad first impression for him. He’s more-so annoyed with you, for suddenly bringing in a stranger and offering to share his personal work with him when you know- or should know- he wouldn’t like that. He was already struggling with the track, and now he can’t even work on it for today. But it’s whatever. (It’s not.) At least that’s the conclusion he’s come to.

Finally, after what feels like forever, at 11:48pm, Rael finally gets escorted out into the front hall. He says goodbye to your friends, which grants him what sounds like a muttered goodbye and a headnod without eye contact. (I’m sure you know who’s who.).

You hug him in the doorway and send him on his way, satisfied with how tonight went. Other than maybe one thing.

You walk into the living room and stand in front of the TV as to get your best friend's attention. They both look up at you.

“Hey… I’m sorry about earlier. I know what he said was maybe rude, and a little intense. But I promise he’s a cool.”

“YEAH RIGHT. THAT GUY SEEMED LIKE A SHITHEAD.” Karkat says immediately, sitting tucked into the corner of the couch.

“Karkat.” You frown at his never-failing bluntness.

“its cool. just maybe dont bring him into the workroom again.” Dave says from his spot chilling on the floor, looking at something on his camera.

“Why not?”

“because dude. i got my work in there too. you know i don’t want some random people seeing my personal feels-jam shit.” He says plainly, glancing up at you now.

“Okay, well, he’s not just some ‘random guy’, he’s my friend.”

“big emphasis on ‘your friend’.”

You sigh, moving forward to sit on top of the coffee table. “Okay, I’m sorry. I just thought maybe he could help you get inspired! If you gave him a chance, I'm sure you’d see he’s really great and you two would hit it off… Artistically, I mean.” You say the last part glancing at Karkat nervously. He didn’t care of course.

“maybe. but i just met the dude today.”

“AND HES AN ASS.” Karkat adds again, arms crossed.

“He is not. You’ll see. I’ll bring him over again and you guys can actually talk this time.”

“PLEASE DONT.” He chimes.

“Karkat, can you at least try to give him a chance? This could be good for us.”

“FOR US? WHAT THE HELL ABOUT THIS IS GOOD FOR US? NEITHER OF US WANT HIM OVER.”

“But you guys should really be meeting more people! I finally have the chance to introduce you to someone you don’t know, but I do! This could be a chance to maybe socialize? I think you guys need it.-”

“and i think you obviously have a thing for this guy.” Dave suddenly adds.

“What!?” You blurt out, very thrown off by this accusation.

“cmon (y/n). you were putting on the happy-go-lucky ass demeanor you always have when some dude youre into is around. and you were laughing like every minute.”

“LOUDLY. IT WAS INTERRUPTING MY GODDAMN THOUGHTS.”

You frown at this sudden accusation, and blush intensely at their teasing. “I do not have a thing for him!! He’s my friend!! And I’m trying to make him your guys too!”

“hard pass.”

“DAVE!” You shout in protest. He finally has to let out a snicker at how insistent you were being about this. It really couldn’t be more obvious. You blush harder.

“alriiiiiiiight alright. fine. if it means that much to you then ill try.”

Your smile finds its way back again slightly, still blushing. “Thank you.” Then you turn to Karkat.

“NO.” Is his immediate response as soon as you make eye contact, because he knows exactly what you’re about to ask.

“Karkaaaaatttttt” You plead. “Pleeeeaaaaaseeeeee!”

He glares at you, and you keep strong with your pouting, waiting for him to give in. This is held for a weird amount of time, as Dave watches, pretty amused by it. And then-

“UUUUGHHHHHHHHHHHHH” He groans loudly and throws his head back, signaling that he's given in.

“Thank you!!!” You immediately respond to his groaning. You go over and give him a big hug, to which he weakly tries to retract from, as an attempt to show how much he did not want to agree to this.

“OH WHATEVER! GET OFF ME!!!” He yells, starting to blush lightly, but you can tell by his weak squirming that he didn’t actually dislike it. If he really wanted you off, he’d be clawing at you like a cat or something. You’ve seen it happen. 

—————————————————————

And so your fate was set.

After that night, Rael comes over and tries again with the two boys. It goes better than last time, but they’re still not quite convinced. So, he comes over again, and again. And again. But it unsurprisingly becomes less and less for their sake.

One day, the two of you actually go out on an official “date”. To which the boys are very skeptical of, considering past mishaps. You insist to them it’ll be fine.

“We’ve been hanging out with Rael for a few weeks now! It won’t be any different than how it usually is hanging out with him! I’ll be fine.”

So, hesitantly, they let you go. They’re silently anxious and impatient when they wait for you that night, trying to bide their time in a way that tried to make it seem like they weren't both feeling this way.

To their surprise and relief, you come back totally sober. And happy! They haven’t seen you this happy in a while. Maybe this is a good thing after all… Right?

It’s an hour since you got back from your date with Rael and you’re in the bathroom doing your nightly routine. When you hear a knock on the bathroom door, you give your permission for them to enter, and in walks Karkat. “Hey Kar. What’s up?” You say, only glancing at him for a moment before going back to applying toner.

“SO… TONIGHT REALLY WENT WELL? LIKE YOU’RE NOT LYING AT ALL?”

“Yes. I promise you it went well.” You assure him again, despite having done so ealier.

“OKAY… YEAH. BECAUSE YOU SEEM REALLY HAPPY… ITS KIND OF WEIRD.”

You hold back a laugh, but it comes out anyways kind of like a snort. “What’s that supposed to mean?! It’s not like it was a date with just any random person like before!” You exclaim and he nods, leaning against the door, arms crossed. “Plus, you should know since I’m totally 300% definitely sober. Do you still want to test me just in case? I’ll walk in a straight line, look!” You start to do so as a joke, but realize after a few seconds that something is off with him. He looks lost in thought. “Kar.. What’s up? Is something wrong?”

The question seems to snap him back to the moment suddenly. “WHAT?! YEAH. I MEAN NO!! IM FINE.”

You frown, titling your head a little. “Are.. you sure?”

It’s quiet for a moment.

“…YOU REALLY LIKE HIM THAT MUCH?”

You smile, making sure once again that he knows you’re very serious about this. “Yes! I really really do. Seriously.” You reassure him, but you don’t realize that’s not at all what he wanted to hear. “I’m actually thinking about asking him…” You continue, but trail off.

“TO BE YOUR MATESPRIT???” Karkat shouts, eyes widening slightly and arms dropping.

“Well… yeah. I mean…“ You look away sheepishly. “Do you think I shouldn’t? I know how you guys feel about him, so-“

“YEAH. GO AHEAD. DO IT.”

Your head shoots back to him, surprised, not noticing the tensity of his response. “Really?!”

“YEAH. DO WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT. GO BE HAPPY WITH HIM OR WHATEVER.”

This time you notice the harshness, but you brush it off as the usual grumpy commentary you get from your friend, not reading much into it. “Oh!… Okay! Thank you! I-“

“IM GOING TO BED. NIGHT (Y/N).” He says and he’s leaving before you can even protest.

“..Night..” you say weakly, even though no one’s there anymore. You hear a door slam down the hallway. Something in your heart sinks as you replay what just happened and analyze the look on Karkats face that whole conversation. It was almost…

You don’t even know. Really, what was that?

Anyhow, after that night, you two do make it official. Rael is over more often. Then, suddenly he’s spending the night “since he stays so late anyways”. The boys get used to him, but no closer to him at all. They more-so just put up with him for your sake. It’s what they had figured they might have to do when you eventually made it official with someone unfortunately. But there’s still always been something off about Rael, the way he’s so “chill” and “happy” all the time, to the point where it seems almost passive aggressive. There was a time where they watched while you disagreed with what they were ordering for dinner, and it almost seemed like he manipulated you into agreeing. But he was so subtle and upbeat about it that it was hard to point out. Plus, it’d be weird to address that they’re being that observant. Things like that happened pretty often, but they never decide to address it outwardly.

Work on the album continues as well. You’re more inspired and motivated than ever. Dave and you finalize your collab together, and all that’s left now is recording. What could go wrong?

… Lol.

—————————————————————

A few weeks pass since you got into your new relationship. You, Dave, and Rael took today to go to the studio together. Karkats been alone at home for a few hours, not wanting to tag along. He decided to actually try and bake you two something as a surprise, being the romantic yet non-physically-affectionate troll that he is. He knows the baking is done when the oven starts smoking. That’s definitely how this works.

As he goes to take the (basically burnt) pastries out of the oven, the door swings open with a loud bang, and then slams close with the same volume. Karkat nearly drops the container when the sound comes out of nowhere, followed by his clearly aggravated boyfriend flying into the room. He takes a seat on one of the dining room chairs. It stands quiet for a moment as Karkat stares at the blonde in shocked-confusion, oven mitts and pan still in hands.

“…DAVE?” He finally says to get his attention. 

Dave quickly whips his head around to face him. “yeah? whats up?” He asks without hesitation, acting as if he didn’t just make a scene, and isn’t home earlier than expected.

“WHAT HAPPENED?? WHY ARE YOU HERE??”

“what? a dude can’t fly into his own home and take a seat on his comically high dining room chair?”

Karkat blinks a few times. “ISN’T IT EARLY FOR YOU TO BE HOME? ARE YOU FINISHED DOING YOUR-“

“yep. we finished early.”

“OKAY… WHERES (Y/N)-“

“probably still recording.”

“PROBABLY??? BUT-“

Another unnecessarily loud bang as the front door opens, and you come flying in.

“CAN WE NOT JUST OPEN THE DOOR LIKE NORMAL FUCKING PEOPLE?!” Karkat yells, now very aggravated after almost dropping the baked goods on the floor for the second time.

“Dave!!” You yell, remaining hovering above ground when you come to a halt in front of him. “What the hell was that about?! What do you mean you won’t do it?!”

“WONT DO WHAT??” Karkat asks from behind you, still confused.

“i just don’t feel like doing it anymore.”

“What?! But we spent so long working on the song! What happened?”

“YEAH SO IM SURE ITS A BIG FUCKING SURPRISE TO ALL OF US, BUT IM WONDERING THE SAME THING!!” Karkat interjects between the two of you, really desiring some type of answer.

You sigh, looking over to Karkat. “Dave suddenly said he didn’t wanna do the song anymore after we spent like not even a half hour trying to record it. He just said he didn’t want to do it and flew out!” You turn to look at Dave again. “I had to leave Rael at the studio to come chase you!”

“yeah well why don’t you go back to him then?”

“UGH! Why are you being like this??! I thought you liked the song!”

“i do.”

“Then why?!”

“i just don’t want to produce it anymore.”

“But!… but…” You trail off, not sure what to say anymore.

Silence. The three of you stay still for a moment, Dave looking to the side, you staring at him, and Karkat staring back and forth between both of you with—you guessed it— a still very-confused expression. You guys usually never argue like this. If you fight, it’s always lighthearted, but this felt different. None of you know how far you can take this. You take a deep breath, trying to calm yourself down before you speak again. You lower yourself so your feet touch the floor, slowly.

“Fine.. fine. We won’t release the song.” You say as calmly as you can. “But… can you please tell me the actual reason why?”

“…”

You and Karkat both stare at him, waiting for his response. The silence is deafening.

“i don’t want him working on the album.” He says, finally turning his head back to face you.

“What??”

“your boyfriend.”

“Why not?”

“because he ruins my flow.”

“Your flow.”

“yes.”

You turn your head from him to roll your eyes.

“Dave. He’s been helping me with almost this entire process. I can’t just not credit him or exclude him from production suddenly.” You tell him, crossing your arms.

“then i don’t want my song on the album. ill release it on the next one or something.” he says, mirroring you by crossing his arms, and leaning back in his chair.

“Are you serious right now?” You say, totally taken back at how stubborn he was being.

“yeah.” The two of you glare at each other, him straight-faced and you just straight-up pissed off.

This is really the first time things have ever gotten this heated between you guys, surprisingly, and it felt so weird. This never even happened when you three were stuck in the same building on a meteor in space for three years. There was bickering, sure, but never actual heartfelt aggression. The worst it’s ever gotten was when Karkat and Dave first met and fought all the time. But you’ve never actually fought with either of them in a serious light.

At this point Karkat’s had about all he can take while being silent. “ALRIGHT.” He finally drops the pan on the counter, and whips back around to address you both. “CAN YOU TWO JUST FIGURE OUT A GODDAMN SOLUTION? WITH ALL OF THE FUCKING BARELY-ANYTHING I KNOW ABOUT THE SITUATION, FROM MY POINT OF VIEW THIS IS PAINFULLY STUPID AND POINTLESS.”

“Tell him that! He’s the one who’s being totally unreasonable!” You retort, gesturing with one hand to Strider.

“i just don’t want my song on the album, is that such a big fucking deal? you have plenty of other ones. just make one with him or something.” He says coldly.

He’s never been this heartless to you. His words sting. You really wanted to release this song with him. It felt special, since you two put so much into it, it’s one of your favorite pieces off the whole disk.

Your frown gets deeper. “I want to release our song Dave. We worked so hard on it!”

“okay let’s just release it as a single then.”

“BUT WH-“ You take a sharp inhale. “Yknow what?” They both watch you as you carefully calm yourself down. “Fine. Let’s just release it later then! If that’s what you want.” You finally get out, in the most passive aggressively upbeat tone.

“okay.”

“Okay.”

“cool.”

“Great.”

“awesome.”

“Amazing.”

“rad.”

“OH MY FUCKING GOD. CAN ONE OF YOU JUST FUCKING LEAVE OR SOMETHING?! MY EARS ARE GOING TO START BLEEDING.”

“Gladly!” Are your parting words as you take his advice and fly up to your room. That’s when you know you’re upset, you don’t even bother using the stairs.

Karkat looks over at Dave somewhat sympathetically. Dave avoids eye contact with him, already knowing the look he’s getting.

“YOU WANNA TELL ME WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED NOW?” He asks, walking over to take a seat next to him.

Dave sighs hard and slumps into his seat, sinking into the hoodie he’s wearing. “i just cant fucking stand that guy. i dont even know why. i hate that i have to work with him. i already feel uncomfortable enough releasing my shit officially.”

Karkat nods along. Usually it’s him ranting, so he does take special care to be a listener when it’s Dave’s turn, which of course he's still good at with his history of people relying on him with their problems.

“-and like. he didn’t even say anything specifically. i don’t even know what it was dude. something just ticked me off and it was the last fucking straw i swear. like if i told you youd be like 'wow thats a fucking stupid thing to get pissed and quit about' but its not just that-“ He continues to rant for quite a while.

Meanwhile, you’re upstairs ranting to Rael over the phone. He only lets you talk for a short amount of time before he has to go, but he promises he locked up the studio and everything before he left. Still, you can’t help but feel discouraged about the whole thing as you lay on your bed, listening to your unreleased album through again with your headphones. Why was he being like this? Things were going so well… What happened?

You decide to go to bed early.

Time goes by too quickly for your liking after that. Dave stays stubborn, despite your pleading. And you really do end up releasing the album without one of its best pieces you were hoping to showcase.

Still though, it does incredibly well. It hits all the top charts, and passes record streams in less than a week. You’re getting bombarded for interviews, music video shoots, magazine features, etc. And yet, you haven’t taken any offers. You still barely go outside. You spend most of the day sleeping and just scrolling through the stats and comments on your phone. Things have been tense and awkward with your housemates ever since the argument. You’re not sure anymore if you’re still upset at Dave or upset at yourself that you actually went through with the release without him. Is that what he really wanted? It seemed like it. Karkat won’t talk to you about it either. It’s kinda been like the silent treatment.

You hate it.

Your boyfriend tries to beg you for some publicity, which he’s very rarely successful in. It gets a few appearances from you, but fans are still not satisfied. The little publicity you two do together, though, also gets him a lot of attention. Everyone wants to know more about you two and how you met.

You’re so tired. Why are you tired? Your boyfriend tells you that maybe you need to get away from your environment for a while. Maybe he’s right.

——————————————————————————————

It’s been about two weeks since the album release. Tonight there’s a dinner party being held at Kanaya and Rose’s gigantic house, to celebrate the album’s success and discuss deals with professionals interested. There’s lots of people there, musicians, producers, artists, directors, etc, and of course your friends. No reporters were invited, per your request stemming from past events anxiety. Karkat and Dave show up as well, to your surprise. You’re silently glad they still decided to show support in some way, despite not actually talking to you in several days. They came after you, and when you spotted them you got excited and nervous as hell at the same time. You never feel this way with them, it's like they're strangers suddenly?

You’re greeting all your friends as you make your rounds through the giant event hall. Everything is decorated so beautifully, of course the married couple always having an incredible eye for interior design. You make note to thank them again for all this later.

“Roxy! Calliope! June, so nice to see you!” You exclaim, making your way over to the group of three familiar faces. 

The black-haired girl in thick glasses and a blue dress stands up to greet you. “(Y/n)! Big congrats on the release!! I listened to it when it came out and I love it! Really inspiring stuff.” June says happily, beaming that toothy smile.

You mirror her reaction. “Thank you so much. I appreciate the support guys, really.”

“Of course babe!! We got you no matter what.” Roxy smiles, giving you a sly lil wink.

“Yes.. I’m happy to be of sUpport to any of my friends.” Calliope adds. “I hope to see yoU continUe down yoUr road of sUccess!”

You keep conversing with them for a little while before moving on. You talk to Terezi and Vriska, Dirk and Jake and Jade, and many other visitors for a little while. Eventually you get pretty exhausted from all the social interaction, and decide to take a break at the snack table you've been eyeing for the past half hour.

Your boyfriend accompanies you as you approach the table, decked out with insanely delicious looking treats. You don’t even know where to start.

“Hey sweetheart. How’s it going? How you feelin?” He asks, placing a hand on your lower back.

“I’m great! The album and the party have been such a success... What wouldn’t there be to be happy about?” You reply without looking up at him, placing a few fruits on your small porcelain plate.

“You say that, but I know something’s been buggin' you. You know you can talk to me, right?” He replies. You feel a pang of guilt for masking your feelings so much around him lately. You’re scared to complain to him about how much not being able to talk to your best friends is effecting you.

“Yes! Yeah. Of course." You try to shake off the awkward feeling of secrecy with someone you're supposed to confide in. "But.. I promise, I’m okay! I’m more than okay! I just can’t believe this is all really happening.” You insist as you move right to grab some small cakes, putting on a half-fake smile. You really are happy with how things are going. Everything besides that. You wish it weren’t bothering you so much.

“Yep! ...It’s all really happening, just for you. You deserve it, babe.” He reassures you. You smile, your heart warming at his words, finally looking up at him, but see that he’s actually looking around. Your smile wavers. He turns back to meet your gaze a little late.

“Well… I couldn’t have done it without you! You’re the best.” You say half-heartedly.

He smiles fondly, and gestures at a glass of champagne in his free hand. “You sure you don’t wanna celebrate with some booze tonight?”

“You know I can’t.” Is your automatic response.

“Yes, I know how you feel about it. But really, you’ve been so good about being sober. You deserve to let loose for just one night!”

You bite your lip a little, cursing yourself in your mind for even thinking about taking the validation as permission. But still, you shake your head. “I can’t, really. But I’m still enjoying the party! Don’t worry!”

He nods, not bothering to push anymore for now. “Well, I’ll be making the big announcement in couple hours. Make sure you’re ready, cus I’m gonna get some people to record, okay?”

You nod, smiling. He leans down to kiss you quickly before saying he’s going to socialize some more, leaving you to your snacking. You wave as you watch him go, long after he’s already disappeared into a crowd of people.

He’s so sweet. Really, it’s all you could’ve asked for.

So… Why did it still feel wrong?

Rose later approaches you as you’re dipping your 4th marshmallow into the chocolate fountain. “(Y/n). May I talk with you about something?”

You finish popping the whole thing into your mouth when you muffle back “Mm? Myeah, whasshup?”

She chuckles a little before continuing. “You'll have to forgive me for asking, if it’s somewhat out of line, although I can't imagine it being so. But is there something going on between you and Dave and Karkat? …Davekat? You three haven’t talked all night. Usually nobody can get you to separate.”

You feel your stomach sink a little at the unwanted question, and take a moment to finish swallowing your snack before you respond. “Oh, it’s nothing really. We just had a little argument a couple weeks ago and-“

“An argument? What about?” She inquires, keeping a calm gaze with your eyes even when you start glancing around awkwardly. Oh boy.

“Ohhhh Dave and I just had a disagreement about the album I released.. But It’s really not a big deal. We’ll get over it.”

Rose’s eyebrows perk up a little as she becomes more intrigued. You usually know when to keep quiet, but to be honest, you haven’t really had anyone to talk to about this. You haven’t even wanted to talk to your boyfriend about it, since it involved him for some reason, so you’ve kept it to yourself. So, in your early defense, you were probably just desperate for someone to rant to.

“So yeah...” You think maybe you shouldn’t continue.

“And what did this disagreement entail?” She pushes again in her subtle way.

“Okay so, we were supposed to have this track together on the album, right? And we spend sooo much time-“ aaaand you’re spilling. Man, that was easy. She didn’t even have to pry it out at all, you were like an open book sitting on a teachers lap during story time.

As you’re telling the story, you come to realize you’re not even mad anymore. You’re just sad. It starts out frustrated, but becomes a little depressing and self-depreciating as the explanation goes on. “And now I’m not even sure where to go from here. Do I apologize? Do I wait for him to apologize? Should I just be the bigger person and say something? But what if they don’t want to talk to me or-“

“I fail to see what else there is to do besides talk about it.” She bluntly cuts off your ranting a bit early.

“Huh?” 

“Lets say, hypothetically, you decide not to bring up the fore-mentioned subject again. I’m assuming talking to them at home is quite awkward right now because of the lingering elephant in the room, correct?-” You nod in response, which she knew was the answer, because she immediately continues. “-So, you continue to avoid them, and they continue to avoid you. But then, really, what’s next?”

You take a moment to think about it. What’s next?

“Well… I don’t know. But what if they don’t continue to avoid me?” You retort genuinely. 

“In that quite unlikely situation, knowing my brother and my practically-brother-in-law pretty well, then it would probably warrant the same outcome as if you were to be the first to speak. But the point is that someone needs to initiate some type of communication about the situation, or this unusually awkward train isn’t going anywhere. And like I mentioned, we both know well how stubborn those two are." She watches your expression become more discouraged for a moment. "If you feel so guilty about going on with the release without Dave, then I see no good reason it can’t be you to initiate. Why don't you just apologize?” You start what is about to be a protest, but she holds up a hand to silence you before you can. Then she takes a brief moment to bite into an orange slice she's holding in her other hand, from an orange you didn’t even realize she had been peeling. She looks to the side for a second to think while she snacks, then turns back to you. “Even if you feel like you did the right thing, or were only doing what he said he wanted, you still feel guilty about it regardless. If it’s bothering you that much, which I know it is since you just avoided using a chocolate fountain for several minutes to rant the subject to me, then I say you rip the damn bandaid off.”

You take her words in for an even longer moment again. She’s… right. Of course. “Yeah...” You sigh.

She places a kind hand on your arm to comfort you for a moment. "I'm aware of how much you all care about each other. Don't let something so fickle be what pulls you apart. That'd be a disappointing situation to see play out in this timeline."

You smile just slightly at her encouragement. “Thank you, Rose. I guess I’ll have to work up the courage to talk to them about it this week somehow.”

“Or how does right now sound?”

“What?!” You only look up for a second to see her smirking, staring at something behind you, before suddenly she’s taking you by the arm and leading you a few steps backwards.

Karkat and Dave are walking and chatting, looking at each other, before turning forward to see you two, at the same time you turn to face forward and see them. Your expressions of awkward-surprise are mirrored, not including Rose of course, who looks entirely calm and satisfied at how perfectly this moment just played out.

“Hello, Dave. Hello, Karkat. I don’t think I’ve gotten to speak with you tonight yet.” She greets. You avoid eye contact with them.

“HEY ROSE.”

“yo.”

“How are you two enjoying the party? I know it’s not your usual scene.”

“nah, its cool. you always throw sick ass events in your unnecessarily huge mansion.” Dave replies, ignoring the awkwardness of you being right beside her.

“Again, not a mansion. And interesting of you to say so when you hardly ever come to these so called ‘sick ass’ events in mention.”

“hey. im a busy guy, what can i say?“

“Is that so? Please enlighten me on such things that keep the great Dave Strider busy.” She jeers.

“oh yknow. god stuff. big responsibilities. nuff said.” He adjusts his glasses, smirking a little. Then he puts his hands in his suit pockets. You hadn’t failed to notice earlier that Dave actually dressed up a little for the dinner party. Karkat is wearing a sweater and black jeans, but it’s different from what he wears around the house at least.

“How mysterious.” Rose and Karkat both roll their eyes. You feel her nudging you forward a bit. “Well, it’s all for (Y/n) today. But I’m sure you’ve already congratulated her on the release and such related subjects, yes?”

“yeah sure.” “YOU COULD SAY THAT.” They respond at the same time, overlapping words. You’re still not looking at them.

Rose turns her head to the left to spot her wife waving to her. Taking this moment to complete her mission, she waves back and lets go of your arm. “Well, I’d love to stay and chat, but a host has her duties to attend to, doesn’t she?” She doesn’t miss when Dave smiles at the word ‘duties’ to no surprise. “I’ll see you all later.”

And then, to your dismay, she’s walking off in the opposite direction. Leaving you and the two men who you haven’t properly talked to in a couple weeks despite living in the same house.

It’s… uncomfortably quiet for a handful for seconds.

“UH.. YEAH CONGRATULATIONS ON THE RELEASE BY THE WAY.. (Y/N).” Karkat says carefully, and you look over to finally make eye contact with him. You notice that Dave’s looking off in the other direction when you take a quick glance at him.

“Thanks, Kar. Have you guys listened to it at all?” You ask, giving a weak smile.

“YEAH. IT WAS GOOD. I REALLY LIKED HOW TRACK 3 CAME OUT HONESTLY.” He replies genuinely.

Your smile also grows genuine now. “Oh yeah.. that one was your favorite, right? I’m glad.” 

Karkat nods, and when there’s an awkward silence afterwards, he nudges Dave a little bit to say something as well.

“i mean if you want me to be honest, i didnt yet. but technically i was there for the whole process of making it, so i already know what the tracks sounds like.” Dave comments flatly. Of course he was lying, he still listened to it when it came out, but he didn't feel like making small talk and half-assed compliments with the way things were with you at the moment. He just wanted to get to that snack table right now. Karkat scowls at him for his attitude, and continuing to make this conversation as awkward as possible.

You try your hardest not to get upset at this comment. “Well. I think it probably sounds a lot different now that it’s all put together… Maybe you could give it a listen?… Sometime?”

He finally turns to meet your gaze, pocker-faced. “yeah. sometime.” The seemingly cold response sends chills down your spine. It’s quiet again for a beat. “damn, im fiendin for a chocolate covered miscellaneous fruit right now to be honest.” Dave breaks the silence, completely changing subject and demeanor suddenly. He doesn’t bother looking at you again as he walks right past you to towards the table. Karkat follows hesitantly, and his eyes linger on you for longer than you’re able to notice.

Staring at the floor, you’re not sure what comes over you next. You start to feel a wave of emotion, everything from the past few weeks seeming to come up in your mind, everything you’ve been trying not to think about- and failing. You’re so sick of this. You have to say something. You remember Rose's advice, and it suddenly pushes you to blurt out:

“I’m sorry!!!” You say it out of nowhere, just loud enough for them to hear you. Dave stops, Karkat stops. They both turn over to look at you, and you slowly turn around to meet their eyes. “I’m sorry, okay?” You repeat.

“FOR WHAT?” Karkats the first to respond.

“What else?? For not including the song on the album!”

“dude, im not mad about the song.” Dave’s calmer than you expect when he replies.

“You’re not?”

“fuck no. we can release that shit whenever.”

“But.. then what…” You trail off. Karkat and Dave exchange a subtle glance. It’s really not an easy thing to explain to you. “Was it just the fight in general? I’m sorry I just stormed out and never said anything it was just-“

“yeah its not that either.”

“What??” It goes quiet again. You look very confused. Then you remember. Of course. “Oh. Is this about Rael?” You glance around a bit to make sure he’s not around when you ask this. The silence that follows tells you your answer.

You’re not really sure what to say, because you’re still not sure what exactly you have to be sorry about at first, regarding him. All you did was bring your boyfriend into your project. It made you happy. But you can think of one thing that maybe you crossed the line with.

“Okay well… I’m sorry then that I brought him into our song production. I shouldn’t have made you share that process with him. It was my mistake, really.” You’re looking at Dave the whole apology, so he knows you're being genuine. “Can we please just stop being so awkward around each other now? We can talk more later in private, if you want. I just hate having it be like this between us... So awkward, like you guys haven't seen me do a plethora of embarrassing things before, and vise versa. We're best friends, so why is our first instinct when we fight to ignore each other?” After a second, the two nod slightly in agreement.

“YEAH THIS IS FUCKING AWFUL. I HATE HAVING TO AVOID YOU IN OUR OWN HIVE. ITS SO WEIRD.”

“yeah this blows.”

“…So?” You wait for their response, mostly Dave’s, since he’s the one who has to accept the apology. You and Karkat both look at him.

“what? i just agreed that this is stupid.”

“So you'll forgive me? For now?”

“wait hold on. let me think about it. give me a second.” He says holding his hand out, and then bringing it to his chin to over-exaggerate his thinking. He takes a deep breath. “hm… yea i dont know im not convinced. how much AJ are you offering if i do?” He says in a way where you can obviously tell he's teasing, but it flys over Karkat's head.

"DAVE!" He elbows him, and Dave holds his side with a "what! i was joking!"

But then you're laughing, and they both turn to you curiously. It's the first time they've heard you laugh for a little while, and it puts you all at ease, making all the tension suddenly disappear. The other two smile slightly at you after a moment, and Dave joins in lightly chuckling with you. You beam, walking up to pull both of them into a hug. They’re both taken off guard at first, but then melt into it, hugging you back. You really needed this, and it was literally so easy to just talk to them that you feel stupid being so overdramatic about it this whole time.

“Thank you! I’m so glad you guys-“

“(Y/n)!!”

You turn to the sound of your name cutting you off. When you turn around, you see your boyfriend leaning out of the dining room doorway, waving you over. You nod and wave back, gesturing that you’re coming. You turn around a little sheepishly. “Sorry.. I should go see what he wants..”

“go ahead.”

“YEAH ITS FINE.”

“Thank you. I’ll talk to you guys later though, okay?” They both nod and you pull them into one last quick hug before quickly making your way over to the kitchen. They watch you go for a while, exchange a glance, and then turn to serve themselves some food.

It’s been over an hour and Karkat and Dave have been sitting on the couch on their phones for longer than probably acceptable at a social event. They’re leaning on each other, slumped, a sign that they haven’t moved for a while. There’s been no sight of you since you walked off earlier, which could be their fault. Still, they figured maybe you’d come find them. Finally, Dave leans back from his phone, his head pushing back onto Karkat’s arms, blocking his phone.

“yo i think im gonna go hit the bathroom and then grab a drink. you want anything?”

“NO IM FINE.”

“you sure? youre not thirsty?”

“YES STRIDER I ASSURE YOU IM NOT FUCKING LYING TO YOU ABOUT THE STATE OF MY HYDRATION.”

“aight. just checking. that shits important.” He responds, waiting for Karkats eye-roll in response before standing up and heading off.

On the way to the bathroom, Dave says hey to June and Jade and a couple other people. He forgot that there were actually a lot of people he knew here and not just random artists and whoever else Rose invited. The closer he gets to the bathroom, the less noisy his surroundings get, the chatter slightly fading to a muffle as Dave closes the door behind him into the hallway.

“jesus this place is a fucking maze.” He mumbles to himself, despite being alone. When he gets up to the bathroom door, he can hear a voice from inside. Figuring he’ll just wait until they’re out, he leans his back against the wall. Though it’s weird someone is talking in a one person bathroom? He ends up eavesdropping a little. That’s when he realizes the voice is familiar. It takes a few seconds and then… it’s Rael. He wasn’t going to think anything of it, just going back to minding his business, until he hears your name.

“Yeah (Y/n)’s party is going great! It’ll be announced soon and we’ll get to start the next project together. It’s all going hella smooth.” Dave doesn’t notice when he’s subconsciously leaning his ear to the wall for a better listen. “Dude what? Nah, it’s fine. When I break up with them, they’ll still have those two dorks they obviously like. I just need to get this part over with so I can start making bank. But it’ll be fun.” Dave’s eyes widen more with every word. There’s no way. He has to be imagining this. “Yeah, I’m good. I mean, like I said before, the other perks of the relationship aren’t bad either. You should’ve seen the way they-“

“no fucking way.” He mumbles to himself, and he feels sick listening to the rest. The anger and shock is so overwhelming, he’s not even sure what he should do right now. Should he confront the guy? Should he tell you? No, no way, it’d ruin your night. And would you even believe him?

Despite his burning urge to punch the shit out of your ‘boyfriend’ when he walks out, instead he starts speed walking back into the event room and to his previously designated couch. Karkat feels a sudden hand on his shoulder from behind the couch and a voice right in his ear “karkat!”

He jumps and swings around to face his boyfriend, his hand on his chest from shock. “JEGUS CHRIST DAVE YOU SCARED THE EVERLIVING FUCK OUT OF ME!!” He shouts.

“dude. you won’t believe the shit i just heard.” He says, ignoring the previous comment, his voice a little quieter than normal.

“WHAT? I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO THE BATHROOM?”

“yeah yeah i was. but (y/n)’s boyfriend was in there, and he..” Dave goes on to explain everything he heard.

Every word Dave continues with, Karkat’s face gets noticeably more pissed off. His eyes widen, his sharp teeth start to show more as his mouth opens in disbelief, he clenches his fists. “NO. FUCKING. WAY.”

“thats what i said.”

“YOURE KIDDING, RIGHT? YOU’VE GOT TO BE PULLING ONE OF YOUR DUMB IRONIC PRANKS ON ME RIGHT NOW.” He insists, despite knowing he must be telling the truth.

“no dude i would not joke about this. honestly i wish i were joking.”

It’s silent for a moment, and Dave just watches as Karkat seethes with rage, staring at nothing.

“so... what… do you think we should do?” He asks cautiously. But instead of saying anything, Karkat's standing up and darting off like he’s on a mission. Dave quickly tries to follow behind him, startled.

“wait. wait! karkat.” He shouts, catching up to him and grabbing his shoulder, making him stop.

“WHAT?!” He says, whipping around to face him.

“what are you doing??”

“GEE I WONDER. I’M GOING TO TELL THEM THAT THEIR BOYFRIEND IS A HUGE DOUCHEBAG!! WHAT THE HELL ELSE?!”

“you cant!” He replies immediately, and he’s not even sure where it came from, it was so automatic.

“WHY?!?!” 

“because!… i dont know. maybe its not the right time. cus yknow itd kinda suck if i got told my boyfriend was using me at a party im supposed to be enjoying and celebrating my success at and shit. right?” He explains, even a little unsure of his own words. Karkat takes a second to think about it, and it seems to resonate with him a little, but thinking about what the guy said again, his anger returns and he shakes the previous thought off.

“DAVE. WHO GIVES A FAT FLYING FUCK ABOUT TIMING!!" He argues, throwing his arms up to emphasize. "I GET HOW YOU FEEL, BUT IF I WERE THEM, I WOULD WANT TO KNOW. AND I DON’T KNOW WHY YOU’RE SO OVERPROTECTIVE WITH (Y/N) ANYWAYS. YOU SHOULD’VE TOLD THEM WHAT THEY SAID THAT NIGHT THEY WERE DRUNK TOO, BUT THEY STILL DON’T EVEN KNOW. DON’T THEY DESERVE TO KNOW IMPORTANT SHIT LIKE THIS??”

There’s a silence. He knows that Dave agrees, but he doesn’t understand why he’s being so careful anyways. “IM TELLING THEM.” And with that, he continues to stomp around looking for you, Dave somewhat anxiously following behind him.

They finally spot you from behind, talking to some people they’ve never seen before.

“(Y/N)!” Karkat shouts when he’s a few feet away from you, making everyone in the circle turn. When you turn around though, your face has a bit of a pink hue, and there’s an empty bottle in your hand. An alcohol bottle. Not only that, but when you see the two of them, your face immediately lights up and you smile that big, goofy, drunk smile. You stumble a little bit to meet them when they both stop in their tracks at the sight of you. Karkat reaches out to hold your arms, steadying you when you get to them.

“(Y/N)?? WHAT THE FUCK?! I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING SOBER?!” He says and Dave nods, still in a bit of shock.

“Yeahhhh! I was! Butt yknoww Raelie said ‘ohhh come onnnnnnnn its ur night! u should be celebrating with booze!! dont be lame’ And I thought ok YEAH! I mean what’s one…. Or ah fwew drinks gonna make a big differance.. rhight?” You ramble, making big gestures as you speak. Both of their hearts sink as you talk, realizing what’s going on.

“he seriously peer pressured you into drinking again? even though he knew you were trying to stay sober?” Dave says, feeling disgusted at the thought of him again.

“Huh?? No i chouse to-”

“NO YOU IDIOT HE MADE YOU FEEL LAME FOR TRYING TO BE SOBER. THATS WHAT FUCKING PEER PRESSURE IS!! AM I REALLY HAVING TO EXPLAIN THIS SHIT TO YOU? ARE YOU A WRIGGER OR SOMETHING? DID YOU JUST HATCH??”

You frown. “I know what peer presure is!!! He didn’t preshure me!!” You shout back defensively.

“karkat chill. its not their fault.” Dave says, trying to calm him a little. Of course, those were not the best words he could’ve chosen.

“CHILL??? FUCK NO!! IM NOT GONNA SIT BACK AND WATCH MY BEST FRIEND GET ABSOLUTELY FUCKED OVER BY SOME DOUCHEY GARBAGE CAN IN A HUMAN FLESH SUIT. HE CAN SUCK MY GOUGING BONE BULDGE!! I DONT GIVE A FUCK ANYMORE.” He’s yelling louder than normal, and quite a few people have started to stare now. Dave looks around awkwardly. You are now confused and a little shocked at the sudden outburst.

“I’m sorry, I can do what now?” Comes a familiar voice from behind the two boys. They turn their heads to see Rael.

“YOU HEARD ME MOTHERFUCKER!! HOW DARE YOU WALK THE EARTH I CREATED JUST TO BE SUCH A FUCKING BULDGEWAD TO SOMEONE WHO ALSO FUCKING CREATED IT!!! I LOATHE WHATEVER KIND OF SORRY EXCUSE IS ABOUT TO COME OUT OF YOUR IGNORANCE TUNNEL AFTER THIS!” He shouts, pointing in his face, as Rael puts his hands up in defense- a little jokingly. Rael holds somewhat of a smug look on his face, faking surprise, which only pisses Karkat off more.

“Woah! Woah! Calm down, man!” He starts, moving past him with his hands still in the air, to be next to you. He places a hand on your back, and Dave has to hold Karkat back by the arm. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m just trying to throw my partner a good album-release-dinner-party.”

Karkat shakes off Dave’s grasp to get up in his face again. “YOU DIDN’T THROW JACK SHIT. ROSE AND KANAYA PROBABLY PLANNED THIS ENTIRE THING THEMSELVES. AND YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHAT THE HELL IM TALKING ABOUT YOU TWO-FACED BLITHERING FECULENT SHITHOLE!!” A few people in the crowd of people gasp at this, and Dave sighs, putting a hand up to shield his face slightly.

“What are you talking about?!” You finally shout back, extremely confused.

“(Y/N).” Karkat looks deep into your eyes, with a gaze more gentle than he was just staring up at your boyfriend with, placing both hands on your shoulders. Your eyes widen, and Rael stares down at you two blank-faced. “THIS GUY IS USING YOU FOR YOUR FAME. WE HEARD HIM SAY IT. WELL… DAVE HEARD HIM SAY IT.”

You glance over his shoulder at Dave, and he nods slightly, reassuring the statement. You go back to eye contact with Karkat, and he looks dead serious. “BREAK UP WITH HIM. TRUST ME ON THIS.” He tells you suddenly, and your eyes widen again, bigger this time.

“What?!” You say immediately, shocked, but Karkat keeps the same serious face. You want to trust him but…

You look up to your boyfriend, who’s not even looking at you, he’s making some kind of intense eye contact with Dave. “Rael… Whaht are they talking about?? You’re.. ushing me?” You mean to say as a firm question, but it also comes out a little nervous.

He turns to make eye contact with you, and for a half-second you can’t see any emotion in his face. Then he melts into a sweet loving tone “No, baby. Of course not.” He takes your cheek in one hand. “I would never do some lame shit like that. Why would I go through all that just for some clout?? I really don’t know what they’re saying.” You immediately feel comforted by this, but there’s still a doubtful gut feeling in you. Your mind is a little clouded from drinking, but you know you always trust your best friends. Why would they lie to you? They have never liked him though… But they still wouldn’t lie… Right?

Karkat, on the other hand, is about to go off the rails. “ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW? I MEAN I KNOW YOU'RE A LIAR BUT COME THE FUCK ON?! WE HEARD YOU SAY IT.”

“Say what?” He says, turning to them, looking genuinely confused.

“that youre using them!” Dave cuts in suddenly, finally having enough of this conversation. “you said you were only working on the album for the fame and you were gonna break up with them! i heard your whole sleezy ass conversation in the bathroom. why would you even go to the bathroom to take a phonecall if it wasn’t for something you were trying to hide?”

Your heart pangs. Why are they so genuinely upset if Rael said they were wrong? Maybe it’s a misunderstanding?

“In the bathroom?? I was never talking to someone in the bathroom. And why would you even be trying to listen to my conversation if I was? That’s just weird." Dave opens his mouth to retort, but Rael cuts him off again. "But anyways, I’d never screw them over like that! You guys are making ridiculous assumptions!” He starts to get defensive now. It’s a really believable act, because you’re not sure who to believe at all. Although, you’re starting to lean towards Rael, despite your better judgment. Even if these two are actually telling the truth, then this party would just turn into a big scandal event and the next few months of your life will probably be hell again. You don’t want to believe it.

“seriously?!” Now Dave’s getting actually pissed, as he moves in closer to the rest of you. You can feel the heat rising.

“JUST TELL THE FUCKING TRUTH YOU FUCK. SERIOUSLY WE’RE GIVING YOU A FREE FUCKING PASS HERE.”

“I don’t know what the hell you two are talking about, I told you! I wouldn’t do stupid petty shit like that.”

“ARE YOU SURE?? BECAUSE IT SEEMS TO ME TO BE RIGHT UP YOUR DAMN DECEIVING ASS ALLEY.”

“I’m sorry, do you two have any kind of proof of anything? Because this is a lot to be accusing someone of suddenly. Is this a publicity stunt?”

“what?? no-“

“WHY WOULD WE NEED PROOF? WE’RE (Y/N)’S CLOSEST FRIENDS WHY WOULD WE HAVE TO LIE?! YOU'RE THE ONE DOING THE PUBLICITY STUNT WITH THEM!!”

So many people are looking right now. You start to hear whispers. Glancing around, luckily you don’t see anyone recording, but you start to remember the articles again, and you’re getting more anxious by the second.

“HEY. IVE GOT AN IDEA. HOW ABOUT INSTEAD OF DEALING THIS USELESS BACK AND FORTH WITH THIS FILTH SPEWING TAINT-LICKER, WE JUST FUCKING DROP HIM ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE DAMN PLANET OR SOMETHING!!! THEN MAYBE HE’D STOP FUCKING UP OUR LIVES!!”

“ALRIGHT!!!” You shout, matching Karkat’s volume, immediately silencing him and making them all turn to you. You look around again anxiously before you continue, lowering your tone now. “Look. I don’t know what the hellss gotten into you two toniight but this is reaaally REALLY annoying and ridiculous!!! Ok!! I get yew dount like him!! Fine!! I know it everyday becushe you make it super obvuouhs always!!!! But can you not make the dinner party a huge fugcking scene! This ise embarrassing!!” You all hold eye contact for a few beats. You’re breathing heavy from the sudden outburst, and now some people are starting to try to pretend like they aren’t looking, to your slight relief. Then, you spot Kanaya and Rose looking over at you with concern. You look to them, and then the bottle in your hand, and suddenly you’re very embarrassed. The anxiety continues to build.

“(y/n)… do you not believe us?” Dave’s the first one to break the silence. The two of you now hold an intense stare now. Your eyebrows are furrowed, but they slowly lift as your expression softens. “I!… I don’t know. All I knouw is thaat you two have neever been supportive of us!! So… Ok yeah maybe itss kinda haurd to believe you now!” You cross your arms.

When you look at Karkat, your heart sinks again. He’s looking at you with hurt and disappointment. You don’t think he’s ever looked at you that way, not even when you had the addiction. Though you suppose you started that again as well. You feel more guilty. “I… I can’t do this right now.. Can we just talk about this later?” You say, tone suddenly much sadder from before.

Karkats expression phases back into an angry one again. “NO. NO YOU KNOW WHAT? ITS FINE. THERES NOTHING ELSE TO TALK ABOUT IF YOU DON’T EVEN WANT TO TRY TO BELIEVE A WORD WE’RE FUCKING SAYING. DO WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT THEN. FUCK ME FOR LOOKING OUT FOR YOUR WELL BEING!!.” He shouts and turns, starting to walk away from you.

Your eyes begin to water, but for some reason you're getting angry at the same time. “WELL… FINE. I WILL THEN! I NEVER ASKED YOU TO DO ANYTHING FOR ME ANYWAYS!! ALL I WANTED WAS YOUR SUPPORT!!” And you don’t even let them respond before you dart off behind you into a crowd of people.

Only Dave watches you go, and Karkat stops and stares at the ground with his arms crossed. He also can’t decide whether to be sad or angry, but angry is easier for him to show.

Rael continues to stare at them after you leave, keeping his place. The two boys both look over to him when they notice he’s still there.

“what the fuck are you still standing here for??” Dave snaps at him, exhausted.

Rael looks around to make sure no one was watching anymore, and they weren’t. In fact, most started to walk in the direction you ran off in, since the drama might presumably follow you. He then flags down one of his buddies and whispers to him to start the announcement. Dave and Karkat watch in confusion as the other guy runs off and Rael turns to make eye contact with them again. He’s smiling now.

“WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU SO SMILEY ABOUT, ASSHOLE?!”

“Haha! You guys are a damn riot, I’ll give you that. (Y/n) sure knows how to pick em.” He says giddily, suddenly changing demeanor so drastically.

“whatever dude.“ Dave comments flatly, not wanting to keep talking to this asshole.

“Hey, you got me, alright? I’ll admit it.” He runs a hand through his hair. “But it doesn’t matter anyways-”

“WHAT?!” ”what?!” They say in unison.

On the speakers a little further into the room, an announcement starts being made.

              [Hey everyone! Thanks so much for coming out to celebrate (Y/n)’s Third album release! There’s a few things we want to-]

“Yeah, look, they’re not gonna believe you. It’s too fucking wild of an assumption. Because really, why would someone go through all that for fame?”

“YEAH THATS EXACTLY WHAT IM WONDERING. YOU’D HAVE TO BE A REAL FUCKING DICKHEAD.” Karkat snaps back sarcastically.

              [-If you discussed any possible offers for (Y/n) tonight please make sure one of their managers has your contact information as well as-]

“Exactly. But I’m not like everyone. I’ll do anything to achieve my what I wan-“

“OH MY GOD PLEASE SHUT THE EVERLOVING FUCK UP.” Karkat groans, cutting off what sounded to be the start of a cringy self determination speech.

Rael laughs again. It rumbles over the announcement that continues to overlap their conversation. “Alright alright. I know you guys are sick of me now. But hey, think of it like this-"

              [-I mean truly, we're all so proud of the success that has continued to skyrocket from this long-awaited release, and there's sure to just be more great works on the way-]

"-You can have (Y/n) after the tour now, so it's not all that bad for you guys. Since you’re so obsessed with each other, I’m sure that’s what you wanted!”

“WHAT?!” They both say again in unison.

“Oh, I’m sorry did you not notice yourselves yet? Even if I did actually like (Y/n), which I almost did in the beginning by the way, how could I not see the obvious tension between you three? It would be impossibly awkward to be around you together all the time, and I can never seem to get them away from you either. You’re all they ever talk about for gods sake.” Rael even chuckles a little at the thought of it, clearly not even that bothered by it, just amused.

Dave and Karkat side eye each other for a few moments, trying to read each other’s expression about this accusation, and feeling slightly more guilty about the situation now than before. Were they really preventing you from having a relationship, even if this guy hadn't turned out to be a douchebag?

Then something clicks in Dave’s head. “hold on… did you say tour?” He asks suddenly, and Karkat looks at him confused as it starts to click for him too.

Raels smiles again at this, and he starts walking backwards towards where the announcement is being made. “Well. Maybe I’ll catch you guys later!” He shouts nicely.

“GET BACK HERE YOU FUCK!! YOUR PLAN ISN’T EVEN GOOD PEOPLE ARE JUST GONNA FUCKING HATE YOU AFTER!! YOU’RE A BUMBLING IMBECILE!!!” Karkat shouts after him, but he only laughs as he turns around and disappears from sight again.

“hey, it’s fine. i got that all on recording.” Dave says calmly, holding up his phone that still continues to take a video, and holding Karkat from going after him with his other arm. 

“WHAT? REALLY?”

“yeah. he was talking all that shit earlier about having no proof. but they have to believe us now, right?”

              [But anyways, enough of me! We’d like to tell you all some big news that we’ve finally made official! And I’ll pass the mic over to Rael so he can share it with you all!]

Karkat and Dave turn toward the speakers. There’s a lot of people gathered around a small platform where Rael's friend was just making the announcements. They can barely see over the amount of people, but then Dave spots your face as you walk up and stand behind Rael. There’s no readable emotion on your face.

              [R: Thank you all! Really! This has been such a great event. And I want to especially thank the lovely Rose Lalonde and Kanaya Maryam for knowing how to throw together such a great dinner party on such short notice!] 

Karkat rolls his eyes and huffs.

              [R: Now I’m sure you’re all curious what this big announcement is!]

Everyone cheers and claps a bit as confirmation.

              [R: Well… It took a lot of string pulling and quick planning, but (Y/n) and I are proud to announce, we’ve decided to go on a world tour!!]

Gasps and applause ring throughout the room. Karkat and Dave’s face change to a look of absolute horror. He wasn’t bluffing.

              [R: This will be (Y/n)’s second ever tour, and I’ll be accompanying them on stage! Please come and show support if you’d like to! Everyone here will revive a free ticket so-]

Karkat suddenly feels sick as he turns away from the stage, covering his mouth. This was a nightmare. A world tour. You’d be gone for such a long time again.

Dave puts his arms around Karkat to support him, and he looks over his shoulder to search for your face again above the crowd. When he does, you both make eye contact at the same time. Your slight smile immediately turns into a frown, and you're the first to look away again, almost shamefully.

You were going to tell them before it was announced, but everything happened so fast. You knew they’d be upset if they didn’t hear it from you.

Dave frowns and turns to walk towards the door with Karkat. Tonight was a lot, so maybe it’d be better to just go home.

But there’s no reassurance or making up afterwards this time.

They go home, but you don’t follow.

You don’t come home that night. Or the next night.

—————————————————————

The house’s atmosphere is intensely gloomy. The two boys can barely talk about anything other than what happened that night. Pent up anger they can’t express to you, since you won’t come home or answer your phone, ends up coming out at each other sometimes. They start fighting about small stupid things, and the arguments always eventually turns into something along the lines of “WHEN THE HELL IS (Y/N) JUST GONNA COME HOME ALREADY?”

When three days pass since the party, the anger dies down a little and worry starts to take its place. Calls are made to a handful of other friends asking if they’ve heard from you. No one says they have until they talk with Rose, who says you had come over briefly the day prior to thank them for the party.

At least they knew you were okay. But now they know you’re definitely ignoring them.

From your point of view, you had been spending the nights at Rael’s place, and your unsureness of the situation also caused you to be quite cranky. You tend to snap at Rael a lot, which causes him to just leave you alone most of the time. He goes out a lot as well, so you’re usually by yourself.

But you miss them.

You want to go home. But you’re too exhausted to want to deal with this, especially right before tour. You don’t even know what you’d say to them. You’re upset at them, but you feel bad at the same time, because you know they’re upset at you as well. Plus you can't stop beating yourself up about the relapse. You broke a promise to your friends, but more importantly, yourself.

You unlock your phone and go to look at Dave’s text messages to you for the hundredth time.

Tuesday 1:34pm     Dave™️💿: yo can you at least tell us where you are    Dave™️💿: and that youre like safe and not dead maybe? Tuesday 3:53pm    Dave™️💿: i mean i doubt that something heroic or just happened for you to actually be dead    Dave™️💿: but you never know    Dave™️💿: maybe you decided to push an old lady out of the way of a big truck headed straight for her because you realized shes blind and couldnt see it coming    Dave™️💿: or because maybe she just had like    Dave™️💿: really ass peripheral vision or some shit    Dave™️💿: you just fly in like superman and    Dave™️💿: wait fuck we can fly i always forget we can fly    Dave™️💿: yeah i guess that wouldnt happen since you could just fly away with her instead of pushing her out of the way which would probably still put her in the hospital anyways    Dave™️💿: but you get my point    Dave™️💿:  like i doubt something like that happened but itd be nice to be reassured Tuesday 8:20pm    Dave™️💿: karkats still super pissed off im ngl but im willing to talk about it if you want to    Dave™️💿: plus i have something you really need to see    Dave™️💿: but i dont want to send it to you cus i dont know where you are or where your heads at right now    Dave™️💿: ok ill stop spamming you but seriously text me asap    Dave™️💿: its like the damn twilight zone up in here

And that’s just from today.

You sigh. It’s really hard to stay away from them like this. You remember what Rose said that night, and you know you should really talk to them.

Rael walks into the room, looking dressed to go out.

“Hey.” You greet, melancholy. “Where are you going? Don’t we start practicing tomorrow? The tour is really last minute so we'll probably be rehearsing all day.”

“Yeah I’m just going to this party my friends invited me to. It’ll be fine.” He says, fixing his hair in the mirror.

“Again? Do you always go to parties this often when you’re not with me?”

“Yeah, why? Is it a problem?”

The attitude in his voice makes you feel sad, but you shake your head. “No.. I just didn’t know.. Sorry.” You respond and go back to your phone, not wanting to make a big deal. You're already exhausted.

He walks over to you and places a kiss on the top of your head, which permits a range of conflicted emotions inside you. “It’s alright babe. I’ll be back before midnight, okay?” You nod and he grabs his coat before leaving the room.

You stay staring at your homescreen as you hear the front door close. Your finger lingers over the 'phonecalls' application for a while. You reluctantly press it.

There’s still a ton of missed calls from Dave, and a few from some others. You linger again over the call back button next to Daves contact name, biting your lip. After what feels like a couple minutes, you press it, but the second it starts ringing you hang up again.

You grip the phone tightly, and then toss it to the end of the bed with a loud groan, falling back onto the pillow behind you. This is annoying.

Suddenly you hear a vibration, and you body shoots up to look at your phone a few feet away from you, but it’s off. Looking around curiously, you spot another phone on the dresser. It’s Rael’s. He forgot it.

You crawl over, hovering over the screen to read a name you don’t recognize. Eventually it stops ringing, and the screen fades to the lockscreen photo of Rael performing during your tour. You slowly take the phone in your hand, swiping up on the screen to the passcode input. You look cautiously around the room even though you know you're the only one here. You know his password. You saw him put it in once and laughed at how stupid it was, but maybe he changed it after? Only one way to find out…

No.

You stop put the phone down, scolding yourself for even thinking about snooping through your boyfriends phone. Why would you need to do that? You trust him, right? You trusted him that night so...

…

It’s not like he should have anything to hide…

Yeah. There’s nothing suspicious that should be there, so what’s the harm in looking? He wouldn’t mind.

You quickly pick up the phone again, rapidly sliding up and typing ‘6969’, the screen making a click sound and opening to yet another homescreen photo of him. You immediately go for the texts app, scanning the messages. You don’t find anything weird though, everything seems normal to you.

Of course.

You click on the photos app. Nothing weird here either. Screenshots of random things, photos of random things, a few photos of you two, and tons of selfies.

Okay…

You click the phonecalls app now, scanning through the recent calls. There’s not anything strange here of course, since it’s not like you would recognize any of these names. However, there is one number that isn’t registered as a contact. You’d brush it off as a spam call, but it was ongoing for almost 20 minutes. Then you notice it was the day of the party, and it was an outgoing call. Why would he call an unknown number and talk for 20 minutes with them? On the same day Dave and Karkat accused him of saying those things on call in the bathroom…

You can’t be sure.. but it is the only call made that day.. so what if..

You hear the front door unlock and open, and you immediately snap out of your daze you got caught up in. Hearing the footsteps down the hall start to get closer, you quickly throw the phone back on the dresser and try to sit natural like you weren’t just snooping through his history.

“Hey babe I think I forgot my-“ He stops in the doorway, raising an eyebrow at your weirdly composed position with your phone sitting at the foot of the bed. “Uh.. Phone.”

“Oh really? How’d you manage to do that?” You smile, which is out of character for you the past few days.

“What are you doing?”

“Huh? Oh nothing, I was just thinking about stuff..." Your eyes drag over to the television. "Like what I should watch on the TV! There’s.. so many channels.... ha.”

“Okay…” He gives you a weird look, and then glances over to spot his phone. “Ah! There it is. Alright I’ll see you later.” He grabs it and immediately starts doing something on it as he leaves the room again. Luckily he doesn’t seem to suspect anything.

“Okay! Bye!” You shout to him and you hear the front door open and close again. You let out a sigh of relief.

…

Your phone starts to ring, surprising you again. You look over.

It’s Dave.

—————————————————————

Tuesday 8:21pm.

Dave is chilling on the couch after just sending you todays ‘last text’, even though he knows he’ll definitely text you again tomorrow if you still don’t respond. Karkat sits on the other side of the couch, with one hand in his hair probably squeezing the color out of it, and the other tapping away on the down arrow of his laptop (husk-top). Really, he could not be hitting the button any harder. It’s practically ringing throughout the whole house.

CLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICK.

CLICK. CLICK. CLICK.

CLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICK.

“dude. take it easy on the keys. i can hear them begging you for mercy at this point.” Dave comments, staring over at him. Karkat hasn’t spoken a word since yesterday. Which is honestly impressive, but it is starting to scare his boyfriend at this point. He just turns to make eye contact with Dave, looking just as pissed off as he has since they got home, and continuing to hit the keys like he’s trying to break them. Then he goes back to whatever he’s looking at.

“ok. cool. forget i said anything i guess.” He says passive aggressively, but also at this point he can’t seem to care anymore. He goes back to looking at his phone.

CLICK. CLICK. CLICK. CLICK.

CLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICK.

CLICK. CLICK.

CLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICK.

CLICK. CLICK. CLICK. CLICK. CLICK. CLICK.

CLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICKCLICK-

“AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!” Karkat finally shouts out in aggravation, grabbing his face and throwing his head back, making Dave jump in his seat. “AAAAUUUGHGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!” And then he throws his laptop (HUSKTOP.) across the room. Wow.

“wow.”

“GIVE ME YOUR PHONE.”

“what? why?”

“BECAUSE IM CALLING (Y/N).” He says and he starts to reach over for Daves phone.

He pulls his arm back to hold it out of reach. “i already did today and they wont answer. why dont you just call on your phone?”

“THEY WONT ANSWER IF ITS ME IM THE ONE WHO CUSSED THEIR BOYFRIEND OUT.”

“ok well if you havent noticed, theyre not answering me either so were both shit out of luck right about now. hate to break it to you.”

“JUST GIVE IT TO ME!!” He shouts hysterically, starting to climb over him to grab the phone.

“dude calm down!!” Dave shouts back, startled, holding the phone up over his head now.

Kartkat continues to fight for the phone, and Dave continues to move further to keep it out of his reach. Eventually, Dave ends up sitting up on the couch and just holding it to his chest, buried in his arms to shield it from grabbing. Karkat gets on his lap and tries to grasp for it, but then Dave suddenly puts his arms around him, locking Karkats arms to the side of his body. Karkat squirms around in this position with all his might.

“LET GO OF ME STRIDER!!!! LET GO NOW OR I SWEAR!!!”

“nope! were staying like this until you chill the FUCK out.”

“THIS IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN THE STATE OF HOW ‘CHILL’ I AM!! I NEED TO TALK TO THEM!!!”

“no shit we both do!! but they wont answer!!! you know they wont!” Dave protests, still keeping a tight hold on Karkat, his head tucked into his side as well.

Kakat’s struggling starts to get weaker and weaker after Dave says this, until finally he relaxes, letting himself drop his weight down and his head fall onto Daves shoulder. Dave lets out a subtle sigh of relief. 

“theyll call when theyre ready dude. itll be fine.”

It’s quiet for a while as they both stay in this position, breathing a little heavy in the beginning from all the struggling, and then calming down.

“man. they cant go on another tour. or at least not without talking to us.”

There’s more silence as Karkat just lays dead still on his shoulder. Dave clicks on his phone to check for a notification, to which there’s still just a blank screen. He sighs. The air stays still and calm like this. He starts to lightly rub Karkats back after a while, comforting him silently. Karkat begins to purr after a couple minutes of this, to his further relief.

“you okay?” Dave asks, breaking the silence as he moves his head a little to try to see his face.

“…YEAH.” He responds in a tired sounding tone, not moving at all. “SORRY.”

“its cool.”

…

“do you miss them?” He asks, and even he thinks it comes out a little strange after it’s left his mouth. When there’s no response, he tries again to get a look at his face.

“hey.” Dave says, shaking him slightly to try to get him to sit up. “look at me.” Karkat reluctantly raises his head a little to face him.

“WHAT D-“ Dave cuts off whatever he might’ve said by pulling him into a kiss. It shocks him, but he doesn’t pull away at all, and eventually he’s kissing back. He starts purring again. When Dave pulls back, he’s got a sweet smile on his face, and Karkat is blushing intensely, his bright red blood always making it so noticeable.

“WHAT WAS THAT FOR…” He asks a little sheepishly.

“what? a guy cant just kiss his boyfriend? are you homophobic?”

“NO! I MEAN-”

“thats fucked up karkat. to be homophobic in this day and age. honestly. you should be ashamed.”

“OH JUST SHUT UP ALREADY.” He crosses his arms, and looks away, still flustered. Dave laughs a little, and then leans back onto the couch, closing his eyes.

“things have just gotten so intense. i think we need to chill.”

“…YEAH…” Karkat looks back over and stares at him for a little longer, blush still lingering, and then eventually leans forward to lay against his chest.

There’s another long pause. Karkat sighs.

“I JUST…” He starts, but is still seeming to try to find the right words. “I JUST DONT WANT THEM DATING THAT ASSHOLE ANYMORE. AFTER WHAT HAPPENED. I DONT CARE IF THEY WANT TO GO ON TOUR OR WHATEVER. WHO ARE WE TO STOP THEM IF THATS WHAT THEY REALLY WANT? BUT WE KNOW THIS SHIT IS ALL HIS IDEA. HE WANTS TO GO ON THAT TOUR SO HE CAN GET ALL THE PUBLICITY AND MONEY AND THEN HE’S GOING TO LEAVE THEM.”

“i know..” Dave frowns as he starts to rub Karkats back again. “but theyll definitely talk to us before they leave. theres no way they wouldnt.”

“BUT HOW DO WE KNOW THEY WONT STILL GO?”

“well they might. but i mean they have to at least believe us about him? ive got the video.”

“I DONT KNOW. THEY SEEMED SO FUCKING HELLBENT BEFORE ON NOT BELIEVING US. EVEN IF THEY WERE DRUNK.” He sneers, still bitter about the way you doubted them that night.

Dave is silent for another minute before he speaks again.

“you remember what the douche said to us right before he made that announcement about the tour?”

“HE SAID A LOT OF IDIOTIC BULLSHIT BEFORE THE ANNOUNCEMENT.” Karkat responds.

“yeah but i mean when he was saying that stuff about uh..” He pauses out of awkwardness of what he wanted to say next, not even sure if he should bring it up right now. “like.. that we should date them or whatever? he said we must have a thing for them.. but thats...”

He waits for Karkat to finish his sentence, thinking maybe he could get his opinion without having to directly ask. To no avail, however.

“THAT’S WHAT?”

“i dont know…” He blushes a little, turning his head to stare at the wall. “what did you think when he said that?”

“I THOUGHT… THAT THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE.”

“oh.. yeah? why impossible?”

“I MEAN WERE BOTH ALREADY IN A MATESPRITSHIP. TO ALSO BE IN A ROMANTIC QUADRANT WITH THEM IT’D HAVE TO BE BLACK ROMANCE. AND I FEEL FAR FROM BLACK FEELINGS FOR THEM SO...”

“i mean yeah. but are matespritships always with two people for trolls?”

“OF COURSE? THE ONLY QUADRANT INVOLVING MORE THAN ONE PERSON IS AUSPISTICISM USUALLY, UNLESS YOU HAVE FEELINGS FOR MORE THAN ONE PERSON FOR ONE QUADRANT BUT…”

“..but?”

“BUT THAT'S NOT A GOOD THING. YOU USUALLY ONLY HAVE ONE PERSON IN ANYTHING OTHER THAN AUSPISTICISM. I MEAN IVE NEVER HEARD OF MORE THAN TWO TROLLS IN ANY OTHER QUADRANT…” This thought seems to have him pondering hard about whether that would be sustainable. He had never considered it before, and surprisingly it had never been in any of his RomComs. He sits up a little to look at Dave, who turns his head to meet his gaze again. “DO HUMANS HAVE MORE THAN TWO PEOPLE IN YOUR ONLY QUADRANT?”

“i mean im probably like the last person to ask. hell if i know anything about human relationships, obviously i was never in one. but yeah im pretty sure people did that. polyamorous and like… quad.. amorous? i guess? no wait that doesnt sound right.” Dave now is pondering what the fuck a four way relationship is called, not to mention five, six, seven…

“DAVE. WHAT EXACTLY ARE YOU TRYING TO IMPLY?”

He snaps out of his thoughts. “huh? nothing.”

“NOTHING...” He's not convinced.

“i mean i was just thinking like… its weird that hes not the only person to have said something like that right? rose and kanaya asked us before and it made us super awkward. june and roxy asked me once.. dirk mentioned it but not even as a question he was just like ‘your two partners blah blah blah’ which totally threw me off? plus we never even talked about when they confessed to us that one night. we both know they have feelings for us but we never talked about how we feel about it. whats up with that?”

Karkat takes a moment to consider all of this. To be quite honest he hasn’t really thought about this subject in a lot of detail, but it is a little troubling. With everything happening lately, he's been realizing he's always felt for you the same he's things he's felt for Dave. You both meant a lot to him, and he cared for you both in the same way. 

“THERES NOTHING ‘UP’ WITH IT, WE JUST HAVEN’T HAD TIME TO TALK ABOUT IT.”

“dude. we have literally nothing but time, all the time.”

“OKAY! FINE. LETS TALK ABOUT IT THEN.”

“okay.”

…

…

…

The silence is deafening.

“WELL?”

“what”

“YOU SAID YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT!”

“okay yeah but-“

“THEN HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT (Y/N)? DO YOU HAVE FLUSHED FEELINGS FOR THEM? OR ARE THEY STRICTLY PALE?” Karkat suddenly asks bluntly.

Dave's pokerfaced for a beat, like he’s loading. “…how... do you feel about them?”

“MOTHERFUCKER I ASKED YOU FIRST!”

“yeah but! if i feel one way about them and you dont then thats kinda awkward… and its gonna be a problem later on right?.”

“FOR FUCKS SAKE.” He rolls his eyes. “FINE I…” He stops, starting to think hard again. He knows how he feels, but at the same time he's not sure. Having feelings for two people at once, like he said, is usually not seen as a good thing. It's normally conflicting and problematic. Granted, it's usually not a good thing for humans either. They're both struggling with the concept of polyamory.

“I… I DONT KNOW.”

“you dont know?”

“IVE NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT IT OKAY!!”

“really. youve never thought about being in a relationship with (y/n)? like all of three us?”

“HAVE YOU?”

Dave purses his lips for a moment, thinking hard trying decide if he should just come out and say it. 

“yeah. ive thought about it honestly.” 

“OH.”

Karkat's short response suddenly makes Dave a little anxious, and he sits up a bit to get closer to him and make eye contact. “oh shit but you really havent?? fuck... im sorry i just meant because we all live together i just sometimes think ‘we all might as well just fuckin date with like how much we sit around together all day and-’ man im sorry-“

“ITS FINE DAVE I DIDN'T SAY IT WAS A BAD IDEA. RELAX YOU DIDN'T HURT MY PRECIOUS FEELINGS.”

“oh. right. okay.”

“I JUST MEANT THAT I NEVER… I MEAN I JUST DIDN'T WANT TO…” He groans at how much he struggles with talking about how he feels about this. “I THINK IVE ALWAYS HAD SOME TYPE OF RED FEELINGS… FOR BOTH OF YOU. BUT WHEN (Y/N) WAS GONE AND WE GOT CLOSER... IT JUST ENDED UP LIKE..”

“oh.”

“SORRY NO I DIDN'T MEAN IT LIKE THAT.. I MEAN.. WELL OKAY ITS JUST-“

“its cool i get it.”

"YOU DO?"

"yeah of course."

Insert awkward pause of silence.

“so… we both feel the same way about them?”

“I GUESS SO?" He gives a troubled look. "BUT WOULD A RELATIONSHIP LIKE THAT REALLY WORK?”

“i dont fuckin know. but im sure we could figure out a way. weve already lived together this long.”

“YEAH. THATS TRUE.”

Dave chuckles a little. “fucked up that raels the motherfucker that made us finally talk about this shit.”

Karkat snickers back at this. “YEAH ITS THE ONLY THING HES BEEN GOOD FOR AT THIS FUCKIN POINT.”

They laugh for a bit before letting out a sigh of relief, all this finally being off their shoulders. Feels like a huge weight is gone.

“god. we really need to fuckin talk to them now.”

“YEAH NO SHIT.”

Dave picks up his phone from the couch, going into his contacts yet again to click on your name. He puts it on speaker.

It rings…

And rings…

And rings….

No response.

The phone goes to voicemail and Dave hangs up again.

“GOD FUCKING DAMNIT (Y/N). PICK UP THE PHONE!!”

And then, as if replying to him, the phone lights up with a text notification.

[ 1 New Message Notification:    (y/n): ill be over in 5.]

The curtain closes again on Chapter 2, bringing it to a cliff-hanging END.

There are curtains this time. Imagine them. You’re imagining them, and they are closing.

See you soon for the finale!