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chrisevansluv · 3 years ago

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Here is the 2012 Detail Magazine interview with chris evans:

The Avengers' Chris Evans: Just Your Average Beer-Swilling, Babe-Loving Buddhist

The 30-year-old Bud Light-chugging, Beantown-bred star of The Avengers is widely perceived as the ultimate guy's guy. But beneath the bro persona lies a serious student of Buddhism, an unrepentant song-and-dance man, and a guy who talks to his mom about sex. And farts.

By Adam Sachs,

Photographs by Norman Jean Roy

May 2012 Issue

"Should we just kill him and bury his body?" Chris Evans is stage whispering into the impassive blinking light of my digital recorder.

"Chris!" shouts his mother, her tone a familiar-to-anyone-with-a-mother mix of coddling and concern. "Don't say that! What if something happened?"

We're at Evans' apartment, an expansive but not overly tricked-out bachelor-pad-ish loft in a semi-industrial nowheresville part of Boston, hard by Chinatown, near an area sometimes called the Combat Zone. Evans has a fuzzy, floppy, slept-in-his-clothes aspect that'd be nearly unrecognizable if you knew him only by the upright, spit-polished bearing of the onscreen hero. His dog, East, a sweet and slobbery American bulldog, is spread out on a couch in front of the TV. The shelves of his fridge are neatly stacked with much of the world's supply of Bud Light in cans and little else.

On the counter sit a few buckets of muscle-making whey-protein powder that belong to Evans' roommate, Zach Jarvis, an old pal who sometimes tags along on set as a paid "assistant" and a personal trainer who bulked Evans up for his role as the super-ripped patriot in last summer's blockbuster Captain America: The First Avenger. A giant clock on the exposed-brick wall says it's early evening, but Evans operates on his own sense of time. Between gigs, his schedule's all his, which usually translates into long stretches of alone time during the day and longer social nights for the 30-year-old.

"I could just make this . . . disappear," says Josh Peck, another old pal and occasional on-set assistant, in a deadpan mumble, poking at the voice recorder I'd left on the table while I was in the bathroom.

Evans' mom, Lisa, now speaks directly into the microphone: "Don't listen to them—I'm trying to get them not to say these things!"

But not saying things isn't in the Evans DNA. They're an infectiously gregarious clan. Irish-Italians, proud Bostoners, close-knit, and innately theatrical. "We all act, we sing," Evans says. "It was like the fucking von Trapps." Mom was a dancer and now runs a children's theater. First-born Carly directed the family puppet shows and studied theater at NYU. Younger brother Scott has parts on One Life to Live and Law & Order under his belt and lives in Los Angeles full-time—something Evans stopped doing several years back. Rounding out the circle are baby sister Shanna and a pair of "strays" the family brought into their Sudbury, Massachusetts, home: Josh, who went from mowing the lawn to moving in when his folks relocated during his senior year in high school; and Demery, who was Evans' roommate until recently.

"Our house was like a hotel," Evans says. "It was a loony-tunes household. If you got arrested in high school, everyone knew: 'Call Mrs. Evans, she'll bail you out.'"

Growing up, they had a special floor put in the basement where all the kids practiced tap-dancing. The party-ready rec room also had a Ping-Pong table and a separate entrance. This was the house kids in the neighborhood wanted to hang at, and this was the kind of family you wanted to be adopted by. Spend an afternoon listening to them dish old dirt and talk over each other and it's easy to see why. Now they're worried they've said too much, laid bare the tender soul of the actor behind the star-spangled superhero outfit, so there's talk of offing the interviewer. I can hear all this from the bathroom, which, of course, is the point of a good stage whisper.

To be sure, no one's said too much, and the more you're brought into the embrace of this boisterous, funny, shit-slinging, demonstrably loving extended family, the more likable and enviable the whole dynamic is.

Sample exchange from today's lunch of baked ziti at a family-style Italian restaurant:

Mom: When he was a kid, he asked me, 'Mom, will I ever think farting isn't funny?'

Chris: You're throwing me under the bus, Ma! Thank you.

Mom: Well, if a dog farts you still find it funny.

Then, back at the apartment, where Mrs. Evans tries to give me good-natured dirt on her son without freaking him out:

Mom: You always tell me when you think a girl is attractive. You'll call me up so excited. Is that okay to say?

Chris: Nothing wrong with that.

Mom: And can I say all the girls you've brought to the house have been very sweet and wonderful? Of course, those are the ones that make it to the house. It's been a long time, hasn't it?

Chris: Looooong time.

Mom: The last one at our house? Was it six years ago?

Chris: No names, Ma!

Mom: But she knocked it out of the park.

Chris: She got drunk and puked at Auntie Pam's house! And she puked on the way home and she puked at our place.

Mom: And that's when I fell in love with her. Because she was real.

We're operating under a no-names rule, so I'm not asking if it's Jessica Biel who made this memorable first impression. She and Evans were serious for a couple of years. But I don't want to picture lovely Jessica Biel getting sick at Auntie Pam's or in the car or, really, anywhere.

East the bulldog ambles over to the table, begging for food.

"That dog is the love of his life," Mrs. Evans says. "Which tells me he'll be an unbelievable parent, but I don't want him to get married right now." She turns to Chris. "The way you are, I just don't think you're ready."

Some other things I learn about Evans from his mom: He hates going to the gym; he was so wound-up as a kid she'd let him stand during dinner, his legs shaking like caged greyhounds; he suffered weekly "Sunday-night meltdowns" over schoolwork and the angst of the sensitive middle-schooler; after she and his father split and he was making money from acting, he bought her the Sudbury family homestead rather than let her leave it.

Eventually his mom and Josh depart, and Evans and I go to work depleting his stash of Bud Light. It feels like we drink Bud Light and talk for days, because we basically do. I arrived early Friday evening; it's Saturday night now and it'll be sunup Sunday before I sleeplessly make my way to catch a train back to New York City. Somewhere in between we slip free of the gravitational pull of the bachelor pad and there's bottle service at a club and a long walk with entourage in tow back to Evans' apartment, where there is some earnest-yet-surreal group singing, piano playing, and chitchat. Evans is fun to talk to, partly because he's an open, self-mocking guy with an explosive laugh and no apparent need to sleep, and partly because when you cut just below the surface, it's clear he's not quite the dude's dude he sometimes plays onscreen and in TV appearances.

From a distance, Chris Evans the movie star seems a predictable, nearly inevitable piece of successful Hollywood packaging come to market. There's his major-release debut as the dorkily unaware jock Jake in the guilty pleasure Not Another Teen Movie (in one memorable scene, Evans has whipped cream on his chest and a banana up his ass). The female-friendly hunk appeal—his character in The Nanny Diaries is named simply Harvard Hottie—is balanced by a kind of casual-Friday, I'm-from-Boston regular-dudeness. Following the siren song of comic-book cash, he was the Human Torch in two Fantastic Four films. As with scrawny Steve Rogers, the Captain America suit beefed up his stature as a formidable screen presence, a bankable leading man, all of which leads us to The Avengers, this season's megabudget, megawatt ensemble in which he stars alongside Scarlett Johansson, Mark Ruffalo, Robert Downey Jr., and Chris Hemsworth.

It all feels inevitable—and yet it nearly didn't happen. Evans repeatedly turned down the Captain America role, fearing he'd be locked into what was originally a nine-picture deal. He was shooting Puncture, about a drug-addicted lawyer, at the time. Most actors doing small-budget legal dramas would jump at the chance to play the lead in a Marvel franchise, but Evans saw a decade of his life flash before his eyes.

What he remembers thinking is this: "What if the movie comes out and it's a success and I just reject all of this? What if I want to move to the fucking woods?"

By "the woods," he doesn't mean a quiet life away from the spotlight, some general metaphorical life escape route. He means the actual woods. "For a long time all I wanted for Christmas were books about outdoor survival," he says. "I was convinced that I was going to move to the woods. I camped a lot, I took classes. At 18, I told myself if I don't live in the woods by the time I'm 25, I have failed."

Evans has described his hesitation at signing on for Captain America. Usually he talks about the time commitment, the loss of what remained of his relative anonymity. On the junkets for the movie, he was open about needing therapy after the studio reduced the deal to six movies and he took the leap. What he doesn't usually mention is that he was racked with anxiety before the job came up.

"I get very nervous," Evans explains. "I shit the bed if I have to present something on stage or if I'm doing press. Because it's just you." He's been known to walk out of press conferences, to freeze up and go silent during the kind of relaxed-yet-high-stakes meetings an actor of his stature is expected to attend: "Do you know how badly I audition? Fifty percent of the time I have to walk out of the room. I'm naturally very pale, so I turn red and sweat. And I have to literally walk out. Sometimes mid-audition. You start having these conversations in your brain. 'Chris, don't do this. Chris, take it easy. You're just sitting in a room with a person saying some words, this isn't life. And you're letting this affect you? Shame on you.'"

Shades of "Sunday-night meltdowns." Luckily the nerves never follow him to the set. "You do your neuroses beforehand, so when they yell 'Action' you can be present," he says.

Okay, there was one on-set panic attack—while Evans was shooting Puncture. "We were getting ready to do a court scene in front of a bunch of people, and I don't know what happened," he says. "It's just your brain playing games with you. 'Hey, you know how we sometimes freak out? What if we did it right now?'"

One of the people who advised Evans to take the Captain America role was his eventual Avengers costar Robert Downey Jr. "I'd seen him around," Downey says. "We share an agent. I like to spend a lot of my free time talking to my agent about his other clients—I just had a feeling about him."

What he told Evans was: This puppy is going to be big, and when it is you're going to get to make the movies you want to make. "In the marathon obstacle course of a career," Downey says, "it's just good to have all the stats on paper for why you're not only a team player but also why it makes sense to support you in the projects you want to do—because you've made so much damned money for the studio."

There's also the fact that Evans had a chance to sign on for something likely to be a kind of watershed moment in the comic-book fascination of our time. "I do think The Avengers is the crescendo of this superhero phase in entertainment—except of course for Iron Man 3," Downey says. "It'll take a lot of innovation to keep it alive after this."

Captain America is the only person left who was truly close to Howard Stark, father of Tony Stark (a.k.a. Iron Man), which meant that Evans' and Downey's story lines are closely linked, and in the course of doing a lot of scenes together, they got to be pals. Downey diagnoses his friend with what he terms "low-grade red-carpet anxiety disorder."

"He just hates the game-show aspect of doing PR," Downey says. "Obviously there's pressure for anyone in this transition he's in. But he will easily triple that pressure to make sure he's not being lazy. That's why I respect the guy. I wouldn't necessarily want to be in his skin. But his motives are pure. He just needs to drink some red-carpet chamomile."

"The majority of the world is empty space," Chris Evans says, watching me as if my brain might explode on hearing this news—or like he might have to fight me if I try to contradict him. We're back at his apartment after a cigarette run through the Combat Zone.

"Empty space!" he says again, slapping the table and sort of yelling. Then, in a slow, breathy whisper, he repeats: "Empty space, empty space. All that we see in the world, the life, the animals, plants, people, it's all empty space. That's amazing!" He slaps the table again. "You want another beer? Gotta be Bud Light. Get dirty—you're in Boston. Okay, organize your thoughts. I gotta take a piss . . ."

My thoughts are this: That this guy who is hugging his dog and talking to me about space and mortality and the trouble with Boston girls who believe crazy gossip about him—this is not the guy I expected to meet. I figured he'd be a meatball. Though, truthfully, I'd never called anyone a meatball until Evans turned me on to the put-down. As in: "My sister Shanna dates meatballs." And, more to the point: "When I do interviews, I'd rather just be the beer-drinking dude from Boston and not get into the complex shit, because I don't want every meatball saying, 'So hey, whaddyathink about Buddhism?'"

At 17, Evans came across a copy of Hermann Hesse's Siddhartha and began his spiritual questing. It's a path of study and struggle that, he says, defines his true purpose in life. "I love acting. It's my playground, it lets me explore. But my happiness in this world, my level of peace, is never going to be dictated by acting," he says. "My goal in life is to detach from the egoic mind. Do you know anything about Eastern philosophy?"

I sip some Bud Light and shake my head sheepishly. "They talk about the egoic mind, the part of you that's self-aware, the watcher, the person you think is driving this machine," he says. "And that separation from self and mind is the root of suffering. There are ways of retraining the way you think. This isn't really supported in Western society, which is focused on 'Go get it, earn it, win it, marry it.'"

Scarlett Johansson says that one of the things she appreciates about Evans is how he steers clear of industry chat when they see each other. "Basically every actor," she says, "including myself, when we finish a job we're like, 'Well, that's it for me. Had a good run. Put me out to pasture.' But Chris doesn't strike me as someone who frets about the next job." The two met on the set of The Perfect Score when they were teenagers and have stayed close; The Avengers is their third movie together. "He has this obviously masculine presence—a dude's dude—and we're used to seeing him play heroic characters," Johansson says, "but he's also surprisingly sensitive. He has close female friends, and you can talk to him about anything. Plus there's that secret song-and-dance, jazz-hands side of Chris. I feel like he grew up with the Partridge Family. He'd be just as happy doing Guys and Dolls as he would Captain America 2."

East needs to do his business, so Evans and I take him up to the roof deck. Evans bought this apartment in 2010 when living in L.A. full-time no longer appealed to him. He came back to stay close to his extended family and the intimate circle of Boston pals he's maintained since high school. The move also seems like a pretty clear keep-it-real hedge against the manic ego-stroking distractions of Hollywood.

"I think my daytime person is different than my nighttime person," Evans says. "With my high-school buddies, we drink beer and talk sports and it's great. The kids in my Buddhism class in L.A., they're wildly intelligent, and I love being around them, but they're not talking about the Celtics. And that's part of me. It's a strange dichotomy. I don't mind being a certain way with some people and having this other piece of me that's just for me."

I asked Downey about Evans' outward regular-Joe persona. "It's complete horseshit," Downey says. "There's an inherent street-smart intelligence there. I don't think he tries to hide it. But he's much more evolved and much more culturally aware than he lets on."

Perhaps the meatball and the meditation can coexist. We argue about our egoic brains and the tao of Boston girls. "I love wet hair and sweatpants," he says in their defense. "I like sneakers and ponytails. I like girls who aren't so la-di-da. L.A. is so la-di-da. I like Boston girls who shit on me. Not literally. Girls who give me a hard time, bust my chops a little."

The chief buster of Evans' chops is, of course, Evans himself. "The problem is, the brain I'm using to dissect this world is a brain formed by it," he says. "We're born into confusion, and we get the blessing of letting go of it." Then he adds: "I think this shit by day. And then night comes and it's like, 'Fuck it, let's drink.'"

And so we do. It's getting late. Again. We should have eaten dinner, but Evans sometimes forgets to eat: "If I could just take a pill to make me full forever, I wouldn't think twice."

We talk about his dog and camping with his dog and why he loves being alone more than almost anything except maybe not being alone. "I swear to God, if you saw me when I am by myself in the woods, I'm a lunatic," he says. "I sing, I dance. I do crazy shit."

Evans' unflagging, all-encompassing enthusiasm is impressive, itself a kind of social intelligence. "If you want to have a good conversation with him, don't talk about the fact that he's famous" was the advice I got from Mark Kassen, who codirected Puncture. "He's a blast, a guy who can hang. For quite a long time. Many hours in a row."

I've stopped looking at the clock. We've stopped talking philosophy and moved into more emotional territory. He asks questions about my 9-month-old son, and then Captain America gets teary when I talk about the wonder of his birth. "I weep at everything," he says. "I emote. I love things so much—I just never want to dilute that."

He talks about how close he feels to his family, how open they all are with each other. About everything. All the time. "The first time I had sex," he says, "I raced home and was like, 'Mom, I just had sex! Where's the clit?'"

Wait, I ask—did she ever tell you?

"Still don't know where it is, man," he says, then breaks into a smile composed of equal parts shit-eating grin and inner peace. "I just don't know. Make some movies, you don't have to know…"

Here is the 2012 Detail Magazine interview with chris evans:

The Avengers' Chris Evans: Just Your Average Beer-Swilling, Babe-Loving Buddhist

By Adam Sachs,

Photographs by Norman Jean Roy

May 2012 Issue

"Should we just kill him and bury his body?" Chris Evans is stage whispering into the impassive blinking light of my digital recorder.

"Chris!" shouts his mother, her tone a familiar-to-anyone-with-a-mother mix of coddling and concern. "Don't say that! What if something happened?"

Evans' mom, Lisa, now speaks directly into the microphone: "Don't listen to them—I'm trying to get them not to say these things!"

"Our house was like a hotel," Evans says. "It was a loony-tunes household. If you got arrested in high school, everyone knew: 'Call Mrs. Evans, she'll bail you out.'"

Sample exchange from today's lunch of baked ziti at a family-style Italian restaurant:

Mom: When he was a kid, he asked me, 'Mom, will I ever think farting isn't funny?'

Chris: You're throwing me under the bus, Ma! Thank you.

Mom: Well, if a dog farts you still find it funny.

Then, back at the apartment, where Mrs. Evans tries to give me good-natured dirt on her son without freaking him out:

Mom: You always tell me when you think a girl is attractive. You'll call me up so excited. Is that okay to say?

Chris: Nothing wrong with that.

Mom: And can I say all the girls you've brought to the house have been very sweet and wonderful? Of course, those are the ones that make it to the house. It's been a long time, hasn't it?

Chris: Looooong time.

Mom: The last one at our house? Was it six years ago?

Chris: No names, Ma!

Mom: But she knocked it out of the park.

Chris: She got drunk and puked at Auntie Pam's house! And she puked on the way home and she puked at our place.

Mom: And that's when I fell in love with her. Because she was real.

East the bulldog ambles over to the table, begging for food.

What he remembers thinking is this: "What if the movie comes out and it's a success and I just reject all of this? What if I want to move to the fucking woods?"

Shades of "Sunday-night meltdowns." Luckily the nerves never follow him to the set. "You do your neuroses beforehand, so when they yell 'Action' you can be present," he says.

And so we do. It's getting late. Again. We should have eaten dinner, but Evans sometimes forgets to eat: "If I could just take a pill to make me full forever, I wouldn't think twice."

Wait, I ask—did she ever tell you?

"Still don't know where it is, man," he says, then breaks into a smile composed of equal parts shit-eating grin and inner peace. "I just don't know. Make some movies, you don't have to know…"

If someone doesn't want to check the link, the anon sent the full interview!

#chris evans #cevans #Details Magazine #2012 #interview

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bibbawrites · 4 years ago

Text

Papa and Maggie’s Weekend - Single Dad!Charlie x Owen

THIS IS PART 11 OF THE SINGLE DAD!CHARLIE SERIES, YOU CAN FIND THE OTHER PARTS HERE

Request: none

Word Count: 5924 words!!!

Summary: Part 11 of Single Dad!Charlie, Charlie goes camping for the weekend and leaves Margaux in the care of Owen

Warnings: referenced drug use, swearing

A/N: i’ve had this sitting around for so long that i actually have almost two more full parts done so i figured i’d get this one out there before they stack up any more haha, i know most of you don’t care about this series much any more but it’s my comfort series so i’m gonna keep writing it for me (and ella, this is our series @happinessinthedarkesttimes lol) anyways, enjoy almost 6000! words of owen and margaux being the cutest little buddies and owen just trying his best

Tag List: @happinessinthedarkesttimes @herbrutals @youngbloodblog @courageous-she @littlemissaddict @gloomybrieyxb @itsyagorlemmalyn @jatpxmultifan @moneybagmgk @emeliii1 @mybradforddream @lovesanimals (the strike through means it wont let me tag you)

SATURDAY

“Be good, okay?” Charlie crouched in front of Margaux. She nodded sleepily, the early morning wakeup something she wasn’t used to.

“When will you come back?” She mumbled, rubbing her eyes with a fist. Charlie swallowed, willing himself not to cancel the whole trip. They needed to do this, he had to get used to spending time away from her eventually.

“I’ll be back tomorrow night. So you and Papa will spend all day today and then all day tomorrow together and then Daddy will be back in time for bed time tomorrow.” Charlie explained, his voice soft.

“Why can’t I go too?” Margaux pouted.

“Because it’s a big person trip.” Charlie sighed slightly. He knew this wasn’t going to end well.

“I’m a big person. I’m four!” Margaux protested.

“You need to be a little bit bigger to come. But I promise we can go camping next week, okay? Just you and me.” Charlie promised, knowing there was nothing Margaux loved more than going camping with her dad.

“Pinky promise?” She questioned, holding out her hand, and Charlie wrapped his pinky around hers.

“I pinky promise.” He agreed, before catching sight of the time on his watch.

“Fuck.” He mumbled. “I gotta go now baby, I’ll see you tomorrow. I’m gonna miss you.”

He pulled the four year old into a hug, biting his lip as she started crying. Maybe leaving when she was tired wasn’t a good idea after all...

“Don’t go.” She sniffled, and Charlie pulled back, kissing the top of her head gently.

“I gotta.” He whispered. “I love you so much.”

“Daddy, don’t go.” She cried, throwing herself back into his arms and Charlie felt his eyes prick with tears of his own.

“I’ll be back before you know it.” He promised. “I love you.”

“Love you Daddy, don’t go.” Owen stepped forward, reaching out and taking the crying four year old from Charlie’s arms.

“Go.” He instructed, as Margaux screamed out, Charlie’s heart breaking with every cry of his name. He stood up, hesitating, and Owen gave him a small smile.

“I’ve got her. Go have fun. We love you.”

“I love you too.” Charlie replied, and with one last glance towards Margaux he turned and climbed into his car.

And no one had to know if he cried all the way to the organised meeting spot.

Charlie’s car pulled away and Owen waved slightly, knowing that his boyfriend would be taking this separation just as hard as his daughter was. The blond boy sighed, carrying the still screaming four year old inside, humming softly as he walked in an attempt to soothe her, his mind drifting back to the first time Charlie had left him alone with Margaux on the first day he had met her.

“Just watch her for a second, I need to pee.” Charlie said, standing up and placing the two year old down next to Owen, before walking away. Margaux watched him go, her face scrunching up as she began to cry. Owen’s eyes widened. What was he supposed to do now? He reached out, patting the top of Margaux’s head awkwardly.

“Don’t cry.” He mumbled, in what he hoped was a comforting tone. Clearly it wasn’t, however, since Margaux’s cries got louder, causing people to start to stare.

“Hey, Maggie. It’s okay. He’ll be back soon.” He tried, moving to pat her back. Still no use, and Owen began to panic. What were you meant to do with a crying kid? He bit his lip, still awkwardly patting her back.

Out of the corner of his eye he spotted Charlie heading back over to the table, and Owen breathed a sigh of relief as the older boy scooped up his daughter, holding her close to him and mumbling something in French. Margaux relaxed into his arms

“I didn’t know how to make her stop.” Owen admitted, as Charlie sat back down, Margaux still wrapped up in his arms. The Canadian boy laughed.

“Don’t worry, you’ll learn.” He replied. Owen gave him a small smile.

He sure hoped so, for everyone’s sake.

As usual Charlie was right. Owen did learn, and now here he was, officially on his own for the weekend with Margaux having a complete meltdown in his arms.

He bounced her slightly, humming the tune to Stand Tall, hoping the familiar tune would calm the four year old.

“Daddy!” Margaux wailed, her face red with anguish.

“Papa’s here.” Owen reminded her, swaying back and forth with her head tucked into his shoulder.

“I want Daddy.” She protested. Owen bit his lip.

“Daddy will be back tomorrow but for now, think about how much fun we’re gonna have together! We can paint each other’s nails and get pizza for dinner and watch all of your favourite movies. Or we could go out if you wanted to go somewhere? We could go swimming?”

“Don’t wanna.” Margaux cried.

“Okay.” Owen sighed, moving over to the couch and sitting down on it, shifting Margaux so that she was in his lap. Surely she’d tire herself out eventually, especially since it was barely 7am... maybe the best thing would be to just let her cry.

So that’s what Owen did, let the four year old cry as much as she needed, as he held her tight and hummed whatever songs he could think of, his fingers tangled through her curls.

Margaux cried non stop for the first hour until she fell asleep in Owen’s arms, exhausted from her tears. Owen sighed. He knew there were things to do but he couldn’t bring himself to leave Margaux’s side.

So he stayed on the couch for almost four hours, Margaux curled into his chest, while he played video games on mute waiting for her to wake up.

Eventually she did stir, just before lunch time, which Owen decided was the perfect distraction.

“Good morning princess.” He whispered. “Are you hungry?”

Margaux yawned before nodding.

“I found a really cool place for us to go have lunch and some friends we can invite along to come play with us. How does that sound?” Owen suggested and Margaux just nodded again, staring at the TV blankly. Clearly it was going to be a bit harder to get her to talk than he’d thought.

“Should we get dressed? You can even pick your own clothes!” Margaux didn’t reply, so Owen just stood up, the four year old still held safely in his arms, and made his way down the hallway to her bedroom.

He kicked open the door, and placed Margaux onto the ground, before opening her wardrobe.

“What do you wanna wear?”

Margaux stepped forward and Owen internally cheered at the slight progress. The tiny blonde scanned through her clothes, eventually grabbing at a pair of overalls, before turning back and looking at Owen expectantly.

“You wanna wear those ones?” He asked, and she nodded, before grabbing onto a Julie and the Phantoms shirt that Madi’s dad had made her. Owen smiled slightly, taking the two items of clothing out and quickly helping Margaux get dressed.

“Now, what’s next?” Owen mused, hoping to get a reaction from Margaux. She didn’t answer, staring down at the ground as Owen grabbed her hairbrush and settled down with her standing between his legs as he sat on the end of her bed.

“How do you want your hair?” Owen asked, running the brush through her curls. Margaux thought for a moment.

“Bun.” She mumbled, and Owen grinned.

“There’s that beautiful voice of yours. I missed it.” He teased, and Margaux smiled slightly.

“Okay, let’s get this bun going.” He pulled her hair back, tying it somewhat messily in a bun. “How’s that?”

“Good.” Margaux replied.

“Yay!” Owen cheered and Margaux giggled, the sound warming Owen’s heart.

“Do you wanna go watch Paw Patrol while I get dressed? Or you can stay here and play?” Owen suggested, and Margaux shook her head, clinging to his leg.

“With you.” She mumbled and Owen sighed but took her with him nonetheless.

Two steps forward, one step back.

Almost an hour later Owen climbed out of an Uber, before unclipping Margaux from the safety seat, removing the safety seat from the car, and thanking their driver.

“You ready to make some friends?” He questioned, looking towards the large building that housed an indoor play centre where they would be meeting a few members of the cast.

“No.” Margaux replied and Owen laughed.

“Don’t worry, you’ll like them.” He said.

They entered the indoor play centre and Margaux’s eyes widened in excitement, taking in the various areas of the room, before settling on a high ropes course in the middle of the room. Of course Charlie’s kid would choose the most adventurous thing in the room to be excited for.

“Owen!” A voice called, and Owen turned to find Cheyenne heading towards them, with his twins holding onto their father’s hands.

“Hey guys.” Owen greeted. “It’s so good to see you.”

“You too. And little miss Margaux here, look at how much you’ve grown!” Cheyenne gasped playfully and Margaux grinned, Owen smiling at the switch in her behaviour.

“Cause I’m four.” She boasted. Cheyenne smiled.

“So are my little ones. This is Willow and Ethan.” He smiled, gesturing to each twin as he introduced them. “And this is Margaux.”

“Hi!” Willow grinned and Margaux smiled slightly, leaning into Owen.

“She hasn’t had very good experiences with kids her age.” Owen explained. “Plus we’ve had a bit of a rough morning.”

“That’s okay. Why don’t we head back to the table we’re at. Kenny and Sacha are there and Tori and Jadah are coming soon. Kenny booked the whole place out for the day so there’s no rush and no other people.” Cheyenne said, and Owen nodded, following the older man through the entrance and over to a table where Kenny and Sacha were sitting.

“Hey guys.” Owen smiled, once they arrived at the table.

“Hey Owen. How are you?” Kenny questioned.

“Not too bad. Hopefully will be better soon.” Owen replied with a small grin.

“Daddy can we go play?” Ethan questioned, and Cheyenne nodded.

“Why don’t you take Margaux with you.” He suggested and the twins both turned their attention to the blond, who turned to Owen, a worried look on her face.

“You’ll be okay.” Owen promised her, moving to take her shoes off as she clung to him. “I’ll be right here the whole time.”

“Okay.” She decided, and Owen placed her on the ground, watching as she hesitantly took a hand of each of the twins and allowed them to drag her towards the biggest playground.

“How was this morning?” Kenny questioned as Owen flopped down into an empty chair. Owen sighed, watching Margaux climb the stairs of the playground, any hesitation already gone.

“Not good. She was okay until Charlie said he had to go and then she had a complete meltdown. He was about 30 seconds away from cancelling his trip, you could see it in his face. So I grabbed her and made him leave, and then she cried for literally an hour until she fell asleep again.” He said, and Kenny smiled sympathetically.

“How long is Charlie gone for?” Sacha asked.

“He comes back tomorrow evening.” Owen bit his lip. “I’m worried about how she’ll go tonight when she realises he isn’t there to put her to bed.”

“You’ve got this.” Kenny assured him. “We’ve all seen you do it before and you do this all the time with Charlie around.”

“I hope so.” Owen replied. “I’m kinda hoping she’ll exhaust herself here and just pass out tonight.”

The group laughed.

“That’s pretty likely.” Cheyenne agreed. “I’m hoping for the same thing.”

The door chimed again, signifying another arrival, and both Kenny and Sacha stood up to go greet the newest guest. Cheyenne gave Owen a small smile.

“If you don’t mind me asking, you said Margaux hadn’t had very good experiences with kids her age. What happened?” He questioned.

“Charlie had something to do, I think it was some beach cleaning thing, so he enrolled her into a childcare program. She lasted a few hours before she got into disagreements with the other kids about her not having a mum, and the bitch teacher backed them up saying she had to have a mum. So next minute Charlie’s being called in to discuss Margaux’s “issues with authority figures”, and she never went back.” Owen explained, and Cheyenne frowned.

“That’s horrible.” He said. “I’m glad she didn’t go back.”

“Me too.” Owen agreed. Cheyenne gave him a reassuring smile.

“At least we know with my kids they won’t worry about her not having a mum.” He joked and Owen smiled, instinctively glancing towards the playground, where Margaux and the twins had decided to attempt to climb up the large slides the wrong way, the three of them giggling loudly as they slipped back down.

“She reminds me so much of Charlie.” Cheyenne commented, following Owen’s gaze. “They have the same adventurous spirit and cheeky personality.”

“She’s his clone.” Owen laughed. “Everything except the hair.”

“Personally I think her hair makes her look like your daughter.” Cheyenne said, and Owen’s heart skipped a beat.

“Really?” His tone was filled with disbelief. He’d never considered that before.

“Definitely. If people didn’t know they’d assume she was yours biologically.” Cheyenne nodded. Owen smiled slightly.

“That means a lot to me.”

“Anytime.” Cheyenne smiled, as they were rejoined by Kenny and Sacha, who were now accompanied by Tori and Jadah.

“Now,” Kenny started, as everyone sat down around the table. “Should we order some food?”

So maybe not all kids her age were horrible, Margaux decided as she sat at the top of one of the large towers in the playground. The twins seemed nice enough and her Papa promised her that he would be there, and she knew he wouldn’t let anyone be mean to her, ever.

“Do you have a brother or a sister?” Willow questioned, plopping down next to her. Margaux shook her head.

“No.” She said. “Just me and Daddy and sometimes Papa. But he lives in Oklahoma most times.”

“You don’t have a mummy too?” Ethan asked, joining them. Margaux shook her head again.

“Do you have a mummy?” She glanced between the twins, who also shook their heads.

“We have Dad and Daddy.” Willow told her. Margaux grinned. There was no way they’d be mean to her about not having a mum if they didn’t have one either.

“Do you like Paw Patrol?” She asked, and the twins nodded quickly.

“Yeah! I like Skye.” Willow answered.

“I like Marshall.” Ethan added.

“I like Everest cause she likes snow and I like snow too.” Margaux explained.

“Can we go on the slides again?” Ethan questioned, and the girls exchanged a look before nodding.

“You go first.” Margaux instructed, and together the three made their way through the tunnels, back to the slides.

Yeah, Margaux thought as she followed the twins, maybe all kids weren’t mean.

After several hours of running around, the three four year olds were clearly exhausted so the group decided to call it a day.

“Do you need a lift?” Cheyenne asked. Owen nodded, glancing down at Margaux, who was hugged tightly between Willow and Ethan. He couldn’t wait to tell Charlie that she finally had some friends her own age.

“That would be great, thanks.” Owen smiled, which Cheyenne quickly returned.

With a few last goodbyes to the rest of the group and promises to meet up again soon, Owen, Cheyenne and the kids left, Cheyenne leading the way while Owen brought up the rear to make sure the kids didn’t wander.

And before he knew it Cheyenne was pulling up in front of Charlie’s place and Owen was unclipping Margaux’s seat as she clung to the twins, begging to see them again soon. It was only after Cheyenne and Owen promised they’d organise something that she let Owen lift her out of the car and the two of them stood and waved goodbye to the car as they drove away.

“Come on Maggie, lets go inside and decide what we want for dinner.” Owen said and Margaux’s eyes lit up.

“Pizza?” She asked. Owen chuckled.

“Sounds good to me.” He agreed, unlocking the door and letting her in, placing the car seat near the door in case they needed it again.

“Can we watch movies?” Margaux questioned, squirming in Owen’s arms until he placed her down on the ground.

“We sure can.” He smiled. “Whatever movies you want.”

“Nemo?” Margaux suggested as Owen flicked the TV on, going to Disney Plus and finding the movie in response to her request.

And once the movie was playing Owen settled down onto the couch with her, and was determined he wouldn’t move unless he absolutely had to.

Eventually it was time for the moment Owen had been dreading. Bedtime.

“Okay princess, it’s time to go to sleep.” He said, as the credits rolled on Frozen 2.

“Daddy said he would come back for bedtime.” Margaux frowned.

“Bedtime tomorrow, remember?” Owen reminded her softly.

“Oh.” She pouted, tears threatening to fall. Owen’s eyes widened, trying to think fast.

“I know!” He exclaimed, and Margaux looked at him curiously. “We should have a sleepover. We can get your toys and sleep in Daddy’s bed and maybe even watch TV until we fall asleep.”

Margaux grinned widely.

“Yeah!” She squealed. “I wanna do it!”

“Okay, well we’ll have to go get your friends from your room.” He said and Margaux grabbed onto his hand.

“Hurry.” She giggled, tugging him down the hall to her bedroom. He flicked the light on as they entered, and Margaux jumped onto her bed, eyeing the large pile of Squishmallows stacked at the end of the bed. Madi had bought her one and ever since then she had been addicted to the stuffed toys.

“Okay, who are we bringing?” Owen questioned, sitting down on the edge of the bed, already grabbing the toy penguin that Margaux never slept without. The four year old frowned at the pile before reaching towards an orange octopus, depositing it in Owen’s lap. She scanned the pile again, grabbing a small brown and white cow, a grey dragon, a green dinosaur and a large purple and blue cat that was almost as big as she is.

“That’s all.” She decided. Owen nodded, grabbing the toys in his arms.

“Anything else we need?” He asked, and Margaux grabbed her blanket.

“Done.” She decided. Owen grinned, standing up.

“Lead the way Miss Maggie.” He instructed, and Margaux giggled, rushing out of the room and across the hallway into Charlie’s room, leaving Owen to follow her after struggling with the light switch. Eventually he got it off and entered Charlie’s room, dropping the toys onto the bed for Margaux to sort out.

“Do you want to watch one of those house hunting shows?” Owen asked, flicking the TV on. Margaux hummed in response, too busy figuring out the placement of her Squishmallows to pay full attention to him.

“What’s it ‘bout?” Margaux mumbled, settling into the middle of the bed. Owen pulled off his shirt before climbing in next to her, smiling when the four year old latched herself onto him in the same way she did to her father.

“It’s about people who are looking for a new house.” Owen explained.

Margaux thought for a moment before nodding.

“Okay we can watch it Papa.” She agreed, so Owen changed the channel to the lifestyle channel.

Hopefully the show would put the four year old to sleep.

It did not put her to sleep.

It was well past midnight and somehow Margaux was still awake, happily watching a couple decide between an apartment close to their ideal location, or a large house a little further out.

Owen yawned, glancing towards the time.

“Maggie, aren’t you tired darling?” He questioned, and Margaux shook her head.

“I’m awake! My Squishmallows wanna know if they buy the little house.” She informed him. “I want the big, big one.”

If Owen wasn’t half asleep he would have laughed at how invested Margaux was, but he was struggling to keep his eyes open and her not being asleep was not something he found funny in that moment.

“After this we’re gonna turn it off and go to sleep, okay?” He told her, and Margaux frowned, shaking her head.

“I wanna watch more.” She replied, and Owen groaned.

“We gotta go to sleep, otherwise we won’t be able to wake up for Daddy coming home tomorrow.” He said, and Margaux pouted.

“I wanna watch it more. You said I could watch it ‘til I sleeped, and I’m not sleeping yet.” She reminded him, and Owen cursed his past self for using those words, and cursed Charlie for raising such a smart kid.

“But I’m falling asleep.” He whined.

“You sleep then.” She answered, and Owen sighed. Time to put his “parent voice” on.

“Margaux, we’re turning it off after this episode, and we’re going to sleep.” He said firmly and Margaux glared at him.

“No.” She retorted and Owen tensed up. Now what was he meant to do? Margaux was rarely in trouble so he didn’t really have experience in how to discipline her if she acted out.

“Margaux Ivy.” He warned. “Do you want to go back to your own bed?”

Margaux shook her head.

“Then after this episode finishes the TV goes off and we’re going to sleep. And if you go to sleep straight away maybe we can go get breakfast somewhere in the morning. How does that sound?” He tried, hoping the promise of a nice breakfast would make her back down.

“Don’t wanna.” She mumbled. “Want Daddy. You’re a meanie.”

Owen stared at her, his heart shattering at those three little words.

“You don’t mean that, you’re just overtired.” He said, his voice sounding small, not quite sure who he was trying to convince. Margaux crossed her arms.

“Yes I do. You’re a big meanie and a bossy pants and I don’t like you now.” She replied firmly.

“Maggie...” He trailed off, not knowing what to do.

She ignored him, turning her attention back to the TV where the couple were about to sit down to decide between the three houses.

Owen bit his lip, reaching for his phone to text Charlie, even though he knew the chances of Charlie replying were probably slim. He was probably out of cell range, or already asleep, or both.

Messages between OPJ and Char

OPJ one day without you and she hates me

Charlie’s reply was almost instant.

Char she could never hate you O, i promise

Owen sighed, glancing at Margaux who had tucked herself into a ball with her chosen Squishmallows surrounding her, and was mumbling something under her breath in French.

OPJ she said, and i quote, that i’m a “big meanie and a bossy pants and she doesn’t like me now” so yeah, pretty sure she hates me

Char what happened?

OPJ she got sad at bedtime so i promised her we could watch tv until we fell asleep and now its 1 in the fucking morning and she’s still awake watching house hunters and i told her its time for it to be turned off, like the asshole i am, and she said no so i used my parent voice on her and now she hates me and she’s still fucking watching tv and i don’t know what to do

Owen had barely pressed send when his phone began to ring, Charlie’s photo appearing on his screen.

“Hey.” He answered sadly.

“Give the phone to Margaux.” Charlie’s voice came through the phone and Owen didn’t respond, holding the phone out to the four year old.

“It’s for you.” He said, and she glared at him, but took the phone nonetheless, face lighting up when she heard her father’s voice.

Owen flopped backwards onto the bed, relaxing instantly as Charlie’s scent engulfed his senses. He zoned out, just focusing on breathing, until he was jolted back to reality by Margaux poking his cheek.

“Daddy wants to talk to you.” She informed him, and he took the phone, pressing it back to his ear.

“Yeah?”

“She’s gonna go to sleep now.” Charlie said, and Owen breathed out a sigh of relief.

“Thank you.” He whispered. “I’m sorry I disrupted your night and bothered you when you’re trying to have time off.”

“You didn’t.” Charlie assured him.

“I couldn’t even get her to go to sleep.” Owen mumbled, glancing at Margaux, who was already fast asleep, just proving how tired she had actually been. “I’m a failure.”

“You are most definitely not.” Charlie replied firmly. “You’ve made it all the way til now with no issues, even after the complete meltdown she had this morning. Parenting isn’t always easy Owen, even I struggle with overtired Margaux.”

Owen sighed, reaching for the TV remote and turning the TV off, engulfing the room in darkness.

“Fuck, can you just promise me you believe me? I’m too high right now to figure out a better argument.” Charlie whined and Owen giggled, only just noticing how out of it Charlie actually sounded.

“Kid free time is going well then?” He teased, thankful for the lighter topic.

“I haven’t been this high since she was born, it’s nice to be able to smoke without worrying about her waking up or not being sober by the time she gets up the next morning.” Charlie replied, and for a moment Owen felt an overwhelming sadness for the 18 year old Charlie who had been forced to grow up so quickly, with no chance to be an actual kid himself.

“I miss you.” Owen admitted. “It’s hard being here with her without you.”

“You’re halfway there babe, just keep going.” Charlie reminded him and Owen blushed slightly at the pet name.

“I will. Thank you again, for getting her to sleep.” Owen replied. Charlie hummed in response.

“Any time. How was the rest of your day?” He questioned.

“After you left she cried for a bit, and then slept until lunch time. And then we went to this indoor play centre thing with Cheyenne and his twins, and Kenny, Sacha, Jadah and Tori, and Mags loved the twins.” Owen recounted.

“She did?” Charlie cut in, and Owen could hear the smile on his face.

“She did.” Owen grinned. “She begged me to see them again soon, so you’ll have to organise something with Cheyenne. Then we just had pizza and watched some movies before we went to bed.”

“Sounds like you had a great day.” Charlie replied. Owen opened his mouth to respond, but instead yawned, eyes drifting shut for a second.

“Go to sleep babe.” Charlie’s voice was gentle and Owen nodded, before realising his boyfriend couldn’t see him.

“Okay.” He answered. “Night Char, I love you.”

“I love you too Owen. See you tomorrow afternoon.” Charlie replied, before hanging up. Owen let his phone fall to the pillow, too tired to even plug it in to charge.

And with Margaux’s steady breathing in his ear, he finally drifted off to sleep.

SUNDAY

Owen woke the next morning to Margaux attempting to braid his hair, Bluey playing quietly on Charlie’s iPad.

“You awake Papa?” Margaux questioned. Owen hummed in response.

“Yep.” He replied, voice deep with sleep. “You doing my hair?”

“Yeah.” Margaux responded simply. After a moment she spoke up again.

“Are you still mad with me?”

Owen sat up, reaching out to the tiny blonde. She wriggled closer, settling into his arms.

“Oh darling no, I could never be mad at you.” He told her. Margaux thought for a moment before looking back up at him.

“Do you still love me?” She asked, her voice small. Owen’s heart shattered.

“Of course I still love you. You’re my little girl, I will always love you. Just like how your Daddy will always love you no matter what.” He assured her.

“But I was mean to you.” Margaux frowned. “And Daddy said that’s naughty.”

“It is naughty, but I forgive you. Because I know you were just very tired.” He told her. She sighed, resting her head on his shoulder.

“I’m sorry Papa.” She said quietly. Owen pressed a kiss to her head, playing with her curls like he knew Charlie did, hoping the familiar gesture would reassure her.

“I know honey, it’s okay, I promise.” He whispered.

“Love you.” Margaux mumbled, pressing her face into his neck. Owen smiled, wrapping his arms around her tightly and squeezing.

“I love you too.” He replied. “Now how about we get dressed and go out for breakfast?”

“Yeah!” Margaux grinned, perking up instantly at the mention of food. Owen laughed.

“Okay then, let’s do it.”

Just over an hour later the two of them were curled into a tiny booth in the back corner of a café, the table chosen especially to try to remain unnoticed by any fans that may have been around. Owen loved the fans but sometimes they could be a little much, and having Margaux with him made him hyperaware of how necessary it was to remain anonymous. He had no idea how Charlie did this.

Owen glanced around the room, picking at his eggs. There didn’t seem to be anyone around who might recognise them, but there was never a guarantee that they wouldn’t be noticed.

“Can I have some of your one Papa?” Margaux questioned, catching Owen’s attention.

Owen’s head snapped back, his attention now solely on the four year old in front of him.

“Which one darling?” He asked.

“That one.” She pointed to the cooked tomato that he had pushed off to the side of his plate. Owen nodded, placing it on her plate and shaking his head when she dipped it into the leftover maple syrup. Charlie really was raising his clone.

“Are you full?” Margaux questioned after scoffing down the tomato, eyeing his eggs. Owen chuckled, scooping the eggs onto her plate too.

“Hungry this morning huh?” He teased. Margaux grinned at him, her mouth full of his eggs.

“Patrick says it’s cause I’m a growing girl.” She informed him.

“I think Patrick is right. You were only tiny when I first met you and now you’re huge!” He emphasised the last word and Margaux laughed loudly.

“You’re silly Papa.” She said between laughs. Owen grinned.

“Excuse me?” A voice came and Owen’s heart stopped for a moment, looking up to find an elderly woman smiling at him.

“Yes?” He answered politely. She didn’t look like the type to watch the show, but you could never be sure.

“Sorry to interrupt, I just wanted to compliment you on how well behaved your daughter is.” She smiled and Owen couldn’t help the light blush that covered his cheeks.

His daughter.

“Thank you.” He replied and the woman nodded, smiling at Margaux, before wandering away.

Owen took a deep breath, collecting himself, before tuning his attention back to Margaux.

“You ready to go kiddo?” He questioned. Margaux nodded, so Owen stood up, taking her hand and leaving the cafe, thanking the waitresses as they left.

“So what do you wanna do today?” Owen asked as they began the short walk back to Charlie’s place. Margaux pulled a face as she thought.

“Can we watch some more House Hunters?” She questioned, making Owen laugh.

“Of course we can.” He agreed.

It was just after 2pm when Margaux shifted in his arms, where she had settled down to watch House Hunters hours ago.

“Papa? I’m hungry.” She mumbled. Owen played with one of her pigtails.

“What would you like to eat?” He asked.

“I don’t know.” She shrugged, as Owen’s phone vibrated in his pocket.

“Why don’t you have a little think then.” Owen suggested, pulling out his phone and smiling when he saw Charlie’s name on his screen. He answered quickly.

“Hey!” He greeted.

“Hey babe. I’m just leaving now, will be home in maybe an hour?” Charlie’s voice came through the phone.

“That’s great, we can’t wait to see you. We were just talking about getting some lunch, would you wanna pick something up on the way home?” Owen asked. Charlie laughed.

“I can do that. Anything in particular?” He questioned. Owen turned his attention back to the blonde in his arms.

“You decided on what you wanna eat yet Maggie?” He asked. She shook her head.

“No.” She replied simply. Owen chuckled.

“Want Daddy to pick something? He’s coming home now and he’s gonna get lunch for us on the way.” He suggested. Margaux lit up at the suggestion. Or maybe the idea that her Dad was on his way home. Probably both.

“Yes please.” She grinned.

“Hey Char? Your pick. Just not pizza cause we had that last night.” Owen informed the older boy.

“Okay cool, I’ll see you guys in like, 30 minutes then.” Charlie answered, and Owen could hear his car starting in the background.

“See you then.” Owen smiled. He really had missed Charlie, and he knew Margaux had missed her father just as much, if not more.

“Love you.” Charlie’s voice came, breaking Owen out of his thoughts.

“Love you too.” Owen replied, before hanging up and turning to Margaux. “Okay Maggie, what house are they picking?”

The four year old paused, thinking.

“The blue one.” She decided.

“With the pool?” Owen checked, and she nodded.

“Yeah that one.” She said. He looked up at the TV, just in time to see the house again.

“Cause it’s got a pool?” He questioned. Margaux nodded, settling back into his arms again.

“And it’s blue.” She giggled. “Blue house and blue pool. That’s the best one.”

“You know what? I think you might be right.” Owen laughed, and the two of them turned their attention back to the TV to find out which house the couple chose.

Just under half an hour later Charlie arrived home, unlocking the front door and entering the quiet house, his arms full of Chinese takeout.

He could hear muffled giggles coming from his bedroom, so he dropped his bags and headed down the hallway, entering his room to find Owen and Margaux curled up in a pile of Squishmallows, the lifestyle channel playing loudly on the TV.

“Daddy!” Margaux exclaimed, jumping up and throwing herself at him. He stumbled, but caught her, handing the food off to Owen so that he could properly hug his daughter.

“Hey baby.” He greeted, squeezing her tightly as she clung to him like a baby koala.

“I missed you.” She whined. “Don’t go away again.”

“I’ll try not to.” He laughed. “Did you have fun with Papa?”

She launched into a complete recount of her weekend as Charlie placed her back down onto the bed and plopped down next to Owen, snuggling close to the blond in greeting.

“You survived.” Charlie grinned, placing a kiss to Owen’s shoulder. Owen chuckled.

“Barely.” He replied, scooping fried rice onto one of the paper plates that the restaurant had provided. Charlie shook his head.

“But you survived. That’s all that matters.” He said, and Owen glanced at Margaux before nodding.

“Yeah it is.” He agreed.

And as Charlie settled back into Dad life, he couldn’t help but wish that this was how life could be every day.

#single dad!charlie #single dad!charlie series #single dad!charlie x owen #charlie gillespie #owen joyner #owen patrick joyner #margaux

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cyarikashakira · 4 years ago

Text

Chimichangas

A/N: This is my first time writing a fanfic. I am super nervous but I have an overabundance of love for Joaquin Torres so I had to put it somewhere. I'm doing @caplanbuckybarnes's summer writing challenge.

Summary: Falling in love at the supermarket wasn’t on your to-do list today, yet here you were snatching looks at a cute stranger.

Warnings: (I don't know if these count as warnings) GN!Reader, No Y/N, Joaquin Torres is an absolute cutie pie!

‘They were gone. All of them.’ I thought as I rummaged through the wrongfully stocked freezer. A sniffle escaped, then two, which was followed by a full on wail.

“Who the hell put the Steak and Cheese chimichangas where the Chicken and Cheese chimichangas goes!?”

I slammed the freezer door and rested my head on it and placed my hand on the cold glass.

Casual shoppers and workers tiptoed around me while I grumbled to myself in annoyance. I just wanted my comfort food.

A full on breakdown in the middle of a grocery store and I gave no fucks. A tap on my shoulder and I whirled around ready to light up the poor soul who decided to bother me.

“What do you want?” I wiped the tears from my face with a growl. Giant innocent eyes looked at me in shock as I grimaced at him.

“Hi - um, can I help you?” He bravely pointed at his name tag which said ‘Joaquin’ with the Walmart name above

“Sure~ can you just point me towards the person who decided to sleep on the job and stock the wrong chimichangas in the wrong spot? I just wanna have a little chat.” I said with a fake smile on my face.

“Th-that would be me.” He gulped and pointed over his shoulder towards the stocking material behind him.

You peeked around him and just glared.

“So it was you. You have been declared as my arch nemesis. Where are the chicken and cheese chimichangas?”

“They are out of stock. But we can call you when they are back in stock.”

The air suddenly became tense.

“...Believe it or not, they already have my number because I buy them so often. It is Tuesday and it’s 8:30. They are always stocked at 8pm on Tuesday.” I looked down at my watch to double check the time. I crossed my arms ready to take my frustrations out on the worker.

“We are going to have to call some people.” He said plainly.

“What?” My head tilted to the side in confusion.

“For this chimichanga shortage. We need to call some people.” His smile got bigger as he continued talking.

“Chimi..changa shortage? If they are going to fix my day then you better call them.”

“I’m kidding..”

“Oh.” I let out a nervous laugh and made a face.

He ran a hand through his fluffy black curls and huffed. I took a look at his face, he was nervous.

“...Are you new?” You raised an eyebrow at him.

“To the stock things department, yes. This grocery store, no. I’m so sorry that I stocked it wrong but thank you for pointing it out for me.”

I immediately felt bad because I realized that I was being a dick over some food.

“I’m so sorry. I’m just having a bad day. It was just a complete shit show. My cat got sick, my car is on it’s last leg and my boss is on my ass and I ran out of chimichangas and forgot to restock my fridge so here I am today - “

I rambled on and on.

“Hey, it’s okay. We all have bad days. I thought this was about to be a bad day for me also because you were upset at me.”

“I’m sorry again. I’ll live without them. I should go home before I embarrass myself even more.”

I lowered my head now feeling shy and more aware of my surroundings.

“Before you go, I think I have something that will make your day a little better. Follow me.” He turned swiftly and started walking away.

“Uh, no. I’ve burdened you enough today, sir.”

He stopped and turned to face me again. A smile formed on his face. Were those dimples always there?

“Come on. I’m just taking you to a person who can solve your problems.”

“Oh o-okay.”

I followed behind Joaquin towards the front of the grocery store. He stopped in front of the deli section and tapped a hand on the counter to alert the workers.

“Hey~ is Margie in today?” He said sweetly to the teenage girl who could barely see over the huge counter.

“Yeah Curly, she’s in the back. Let me go get her.” She ran to the back and pushed the double doors with force.

I looked at Joaquin with furrowed brows and pursed lips.

“Why do they call you Curly?” A small smirk appeared on my face. He blushed and his hand went to his hair once again.

“My hair. It is how everyone finds me and the fact that I’m tall. Everyone has a nickname here. We are as much a family as capitalism will allow us to be. Margie is just...wait until you see her.”

The shock of blue hair caught my peripheral and I expected to see a teenager. No. A tall lady who was on enough to be my mama strolled up to the counter with a huge smile on her face.

“What can I do for ya, Curly Quin?” Her accent drawled as she leaned against the display case.

“We have a situation. Apparently, I suck at my job and a certain someone had an entire meltdown in the middle of the freezer aisle because they are having a bad day like it was my fault. I’m pretty sure they want to get me fired but I’m too cute for that, right? So we need a solution to their chimichanga problem.” He sarcastically and over exaggeratedly explained the situation to Margie and his smile got wider as he went on.

“So Grilled Cheese over here wants a chimichanga? How is that my problem?” Margie planted her eyes on me and I felt like I swallowed my heart.

For an old lady, her look was intense.

“I need the goods. The family secret, the whole enchilada, you get where I’m going with this. I’ll finally bring you back your book that you let me borrow when I first started working here.” Joaquin slapped on the puppy dog eyes and Margie rolled hers.

“I’ll believe it when I see it. That was a year ago. I’m never getting that book back and you know it. I’ll be back for you and Meltdown over here, assuming that is you.” She gave a small smile and moved to go towards the back doors. “Give me a sec.”

As soon as she disappeared, I face palmed and groaned.

“You guys are going to make fun of me forever, aren’t you?” I looked at him in despair.

“Oh yeah, you know it. Welcome to making history.” He smiled towards me, flashing a dimple.

“Is there a way that I can make everyone forget about this? I will pay you guys off. I promise. Just forget everything that happened here today.” I waved my hands in circular motions like I was casting a spell, earning odd looks from everyone around.

He laughed for the first time that night.

“It’s not every day a grown up has a total fit like a toddler. This has made my day and probably my whole week.”

I groaned again and stomped my foot in annoyance, ready to snap at him.

The back doors flew open and a brown paper bag was thrown in my direction. Joaquin and I fumbled to catch it at the same time and we butted heads.

“Good thing you knocked some sense into each other so I didn’t have to. Get out of here kids, your chimichanga problem is solved.” Margie smiled.

I opened the steaming paper bag and started crying.

“Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.” I started bouncing up and down with joy. I wrapped my arms around Joaquin and pulled him into a tight hug, crying on his shirt.

“No problem, I can’t breathe, please..let..go..” He said dramatically.

I immediately let go and cleaned my face putting on a huge smile. He took a deep breath and put his hand on his chest.

“You guys are the best and I am so sorry for taking my frustrations out on you. I really hope you can forgive me at some point.”

“Already forgiven. I just always want to do something positive with my day and make others smile. It’s all in a day’s work.”

“I don’t know how to thank you guys enough for the chimichangas.” I held the bag close to my heart, grinning widely.

“Go home and eat them. That’s thanks enough.” Margie deadpanned.

Oh. She was still there.

“Yes ma’am. Have a good night. Thank you for everything!” I waved goodbye to her.

“Don’t mention it kid.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow Margie!” He said to her.

She waved us off and we were on our way to the front doors of the store. We stopped just before the entrance, triggering the doors to automatically open. We were blocking the exit and people started going around us.

“I guess this is goodbye? Until I come in to restock my freezer again.” I said glumly, holding out my hand towards him to shake his hand.

“I guess so.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone, placing it in my hand.

Question marks filled my brain as I looked down at his phone in my hand. He shyly placed his hand on the back of his neck.

“I told you whenever we restocked, I would give you a call so.. I would need your number for that.”

“Oh. But they already have my numb- Oh. Okay. Oh. Oh um, of course uh..”

I stuck my tongue out in concentration as I typed my name and number into his phone and handed it back to him.

“There you go. I uh, look forward to your call for whenever the chimichangas are back in stock.”

“Of course. I’m just doing my job. If they aren’t in stock and I’m off of work, can I still call you?”

My brain short circuited and I blinked rapidly at him. He was smooth. Toooo smooth. I studied his face for a joke.

“You aren’t joking with me, are you?” I put my hands on my hips.

“Nope, not one bit. Are you okay?” He questioned. I was sure smoke was coming out of my ears at this point.

“Uh, yeah. I’m fine. Just tired, it’s been a long day. I should get going.” I looked off towards the cars in the parking lot.

“It was nice to meet you. I’m sorry about your chimichangas and for my poor stocking skills.” He apologized sincerely.

“It was nice to meet you too, Joaquin. Thank you for everything. Am I allowed to hug you again?”

His brown eyes lit up and he furiously nodded. I wrapped my arms around him and he did the same to me. We let go as quickly as we started.

“I’ll see you around, Grilled Cheese.” He gave a two finger wave towards me and started walking backwards.

“Likewise, Joaquin Phoenix.” I started walking in the other direction.

“Haha. So original! It’s actually Falcon!” He shouted.

“What?” I stopped and turned back towards him but he was already gone.

I shrugged and walked towards my car. I opened the door and climbed inside, tossed the bag of chimichangas in the passenger seat and rested my head on the steering wheel. I released a huge sigh while lifting my head, started my car and began driving home. The street lights blurred past me on my drive home. My body was on autopilot as I opened the door, kicked my shoes off and sat on the couch next to my roommate with my bag of chimichangas.

I took a bite and immediately frowned.

‘Damn it. Steak and Cheese strikes again.’ I started laughing and shaking my head, dropping the chimichanga back in the bag.

“What is your problem?” My roommate said staring at the tv, not concerned to turn their head towards my hysterics.

“Nothing. I just had a meltdown in a freezer aisle and I think I fell in love with a stocker who is bad at his job.” I leaned back against the cushion of the couch and sighed dreamily.

“....no offense but you aren’t allowed to go to the store unsupervised ever again. You got issues...”

My phone began to ring and I just stared at the unknown number before answering.

“H-hello?” I stuttered.

“You will never guess what we just got in stock.” A light voice filled with laughter said over the phone. A huge smile formed on my face and I was booking it out of the door and yelled a quick bye to my roommate.

“I’m on my way.”

I hope you guys enjoyed this. I tried my best :)

#cappyssummerchallenge #joaquin torres #joaquin torres x reader #tfatws

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guessimwritingficsagain · 4 years ago

Text

To be seen, part Two (Frankie Morales x reader)

Summary : You somehow get closer to the boys, as an old acquaintance shows up..

Author’s note : The movie is definitely Portrait of a Lady on Fire.

Part one : Here

------

Life went on, and despite the occasional stories Jessie told you - she had a favorite now, Will, and you could see why - Benny and his friends became a distant memory. Then, September came along, and with it, preschool for Clara. That meant changes for you too. You’d take mostly night shifts at the bar, now, just so Jessie could work while Clara was at school and spend her evenings with her. Mildred, the other mom on the team, was already working days. But yeah, your babysitting days ? They were mostly over. Once you got Jessie through her little meltdown because her babygirl was growing so fast, it felt weird to have your life back to yourself. You found out you were giddy.

There was so much to do and see, and you had a regular schedule now. You didn’t stop to think about the fact you hadn’t had a holiday in ages, which is why it came as a surprise when you basically slept through most of the days the first two weeks.

You admitted as much to Jessie, one Sunday evening, sitting on her porch, sipping a beer as you both watched Clara play with a small red truck. Jessie made fun of you for that, but, after a beat, quietly admitted :

« It feels good. I feel like I have more time for myself. I can rest, you know ? Things are … better, I guess. »

Right then, with the sun slowly coming down, the world a soft shade of orange, and Clara babbling right in front of you, you understood what she meant. Neither of you moved, even after you’d both finished your beers. You fell into easy chatter, until Clara showed signs of exhaustion.

When you headed home, it was dark, but it felt good not to have to sleep on Jessie’s couch anymore.

———

You were sweating.

You were sweating and Anna was running around like she was Usain freaking Bolt and the young man the boss had finally hired to help in the kitchen was not helping in the kitchen at all because there was so many patrons he was needed in the main room. You thanked the deities Phil was very good at what he was doing because you were truly understaffed here.

And also : not used to it.

The fact that you’d previously not worked every Saturday evening meant you hadn’t quite had to go through that particular circle of hell.

And then, as soon as it started, the rush was over. Not that people had left, but suddenly, you could catch a break. Anna came back next to you, behind the counter and just slumped on the wall, next to the coffee machine.

« Good job, handling that. » smiled Santiago from his perch on the other side of the counter. He’d come in a bit earlier, alone. That had raised questions from Anna, even though you figured she was now too tired to even care that he was here. Jessie would be ashamed of both of you. You nodded, as you saw Phil come out of the kitchen and walk towards you. He sent Anna on a break with a pat on her shoulder, took her spot against the wall and mumbled to you, quiet enough so that Santiago or other patrons couldn't hear :

« We really need to talk to the boss about that. »

You nodded again - you weren’t quite sure your mouth was still working. It had to, though, because you spotted Benny, his brother and the other guy - Frankie, you remembered - walking in. The kid (whatsisnameagain?) walked hurriedly towards them but they gestured towards the counter, leaving him to watch the room anxiously, trying to spot if anyone needed anything. Out of politeness - or rather, because it was your damn job - you asked Santiago if they needed a table. He shrugged. You chose to take it as a no. You smiled in greetings at the new patrons, and Benny exclaimed :

« You’re back ! »

« Yeah. I’m back. »

As you were about to push yourself from the coffee machine you had left yourself slump on, Phil’s hand went to your shoulder and he whispered, quiet again :

« Go take a break, I’ll handle it. »

You frowned.

« Phil, they’re not … »

« That’s not why I’m telling you to take a break. You’re trembling. Go for a walk, have a smoke, something. »

You made a gesture towards the coffee machine.

« That, though, is off limits, » growled Phil. « No coffee. Go. »

You watched as he pushed himself from the wall and asked their orders. Then, admitting your defeat, you left through the backdoor and let the cool air ease your mind. You fished for a cigarette and spotted Anna, sitting right on the ground, sipping tea.

« So, he’s hot. »

« Who ? » you asked.

« Santiago. »

« Too old for you. » you reminded her.

She turned to you and wiggled her eyebrows. You countered :

« Meh, not my type. »

And that was true. He was hot in a way that made him inapprochable. You didn’t go for guys like that. Though, you thought about the fact that both Anna and Jessie were still obsessed with theses guys after months and that you were playing along and you groaned.

« We need to get a life. »

Anna simply hummed. She let her head fall on your shoulder, just for a bit. You finished your cigarette and tapped her thigh.

Time to get back to work.

———

« So, she’s gone then, your friend ? »

You had just handed a beer to Will when he asked. It was a thing, now : when the place was too crowded, they’d sit at the counter instead of taking a table. It didn’t happen every time, but enough that you’d had to make small talk once in a while. That, though, was new.

Benny and Frankie were in deep conversation and Santiago was -

Ah.

Santiago was not going home alone, tonight.

« My friend ? »

« You know, the lady that tended the bar on Saturday nights, before. »

You shook your head.

« Nah, but her kid started preschool so we had to make arrangements. She works during the day, now. »

« Preschool ? That makes her kid about as old as Frankie’s kid, then. Hey Fish ! Didn’t your kid start preschool too ? »

That got Frankie’s attention and you winced. You actively tried not to talk too much to Frankie. Or to look at him too much. There was something about him, about the way he fumbled with his cap, about the curls of his hair, about his eyes and his hands. Something soft.

(So yeah, you’d looked a lot, but you couldn’t help yourself.)

Will went on about Jessie’s kid, preschool, and you caught the name of the little girl - Maria. Frankie, never the talker, was nodding, a kind smile on his face. You explained how Jessie freaked out at first, how it had changed a lot of things for both of you. Benny asked :

« For you too ? »

You realized that you had said too much. Jessie probably didn’t want some random strangers she had a crush on to know she was a single mother struggling and you didn’t want them to know the only life you had revolved around Jessie and her kid. You tried to keep your answer as evasive as possible.

« I’m around a lot. Friends, right ? »

The two brothers nodded, smiles a bit too tight on their face. Frankie was looking at his beer bottle. There was something there, something you didn’t quite catch but it felt like you had just said the wrong thing. Trying to light up the room, you asked if any of them wanted a refill. Frankie fished for something in his pocket.

« Actually » he started, « I should head home. »

But before he could get his wallet out, Santiago appeared out of thin air, right behind him, grabbed him by the shoulder and said :

« He’s gonna have another one. All of us actually. Drinks on me. »

The two brothers cheered at that, even though Benny said something about Santiago being full of shit about paying. Frankie complied at his friend’s request and stayed. As you were handing out the refills, you saw Will and Santiago exchange a look as the latter sat back down with his friends. Turning around, you took a look at the woman he had been flirting with and wondered if things didn’t work out, in the end, though you somehow doubted it.

When you handed Frankie his drink, he smiled, showing a single dimple. You made the mistake of looking into his eyes and something in your belly grew warm. You felt like you were wrapped up in a blanket, on a rainy day, watching Laggies and drinking hot chocolate, your cat Starbuck sleeping in your lap. You couldn’t help but smile back, even though you knew you were screwed. Not for the first time, you were glad for the safety of the counter, though usually it was because it protected you from unsavory patrons. Right now, though, without it, you didn’t know what you would’ve done. Leaned in a bit, maybe ? You were sure he smelled good.

You turned around quickly and busied yourself, trying not to think about how Frankie smelled.

What was wrong with you ?

———

You finally managed to get that movie Linda had told you about, or rather : that movie you had told Linda about but never got around to watch it and in the end she had watched it before you could. You’d been grocery shopping when you’d seen the DVD and you’d taken that as a sign from the universe itself because why on earth would that small French movie be on display here ?

So you’d taken it.

You were about to press play when you got a text from Linda herself. It was a selfie. She hadn’t changed much, you noticed. Her hair was slightly shorter, and she wore glasses now, but she looked almost the same as she did five years ago. You were so focused at the relief you felt at not feeling anything but fondness that it took you a minute to recognize where she was. A second text popped up :

Was hoping to catch you !

She was at the bar. You thought for a second, there. It was your day off, and you were not in the mood to go back to your workplace for a drink. But Linda was there, hoping to catch you, so you got up anyway, turned off the TV, put your shoes on and walked through the door.

The thing was : everything with her had always been easy. So you didn’t feel nervous going there. You didn’t give a second thought to the way you were dressed, or what the two of you could talk about. You were slightly curious, though, as to why she was here.

The bar was slightly crowded, but nothing big for a Thursday. You spotted her immediately and navigated your way through the tables to get to her when you spotted a sign that made you stop in your tracks and snort.

Santiago was flirting with her.

You watched for a few seconds, and closed the distance with the table, eager to put Linda out of her misery.

« You know, Santiago, one of these days, you’ll get an harassment suit on your ass. » you joked, putting a hand on his shoulder.

He playfully shrugged your hand off, and said :

« Nah, I understand it when I’m not wanted. No means no and shit, you know. But, one of these days, I’ll get you to call me Santi. Only my mother calls me Santiago. »

You snorted again. Clearly, if he was still hitting on the raging lesbian that was Linda, his radar was way off.

« Well, back off, Santiago. That’s my seat. »

« Oh. Girls’ night. I see. Well, I’ll leave you two ladies to it. »

He still extended his hand to Linda, who’d been watching with a small smile on her face.

« Lovely meeting you, Linda. If you ever wanna grab a drink. »

« You’re not my type, Santi. »

She shook his hand anyway. And then, it was just the two of you, together. There was a pause, there, as you smiled at each other before Linda got up and wrapped her arms around you. As you took a sit, you figured it was going to be a good night.

———

« And then, Starbuck tried to jump in the closet, missed and fell on my mom who screamed like she’d seen a ghost. »

Linda was laughing so hard you worried for a minute she would choke. You’d both moved to the counter. Once the the kitchen was closed, Phil had joined you. When she had recovered from the story, Linda quipped :

« I can’t believe you called your cat Starbuck. You’re such a nerd. »

Seeing Phil didn’t get it, she explained :

« It’s a callsign in Battlestar Galactica, the TV show. Starbuck is her favorite character. When I met her, she kept saying stuff like « what do you hear ? Nothing but the rain ». Sometimes she would listen to that bloody song for days, over and over, drove my crazy. »

« Hey, » you protested with mock indignation. « All along the watch tower is a classic. »

« Guess we found your callsign, then. »

You turned around to see Frankie smiling at you. He greeted Phil with a handshake as you, trying really hard not to get flustered, introduced him to Linda. The way she looked at you, you knew you hadn’t fooled her. There would be questions.

« Could I talk to you for a second ? I know you’re not working right now but it’s kinda important. »

He lifted his cap and ruffled his hair a bit.

« No, it’s fine. Guys, I’m going for a smoke », you told Linda and Phil.

Before leaving, you pointed a finger at Linda and threatened :

« Do not tell Phil any compromising stories. »

« No promises. »

Frankie kinda grabbed your elbow, then, to guide you outside. Nothing much, barely a touch but you felt like your skin was buzzing. You were tapping your fingers on the side of your thigh and your hands were a bit unsteady as you tried and lit your cigarette. You hoped he didn’t notice. The way he said here, let me and took the lighter from your hands showed you he did, but he didn’t say anything about it.

« Listen, » he started, a hand in his hair again, « the boys and me, we were wondering … I mean, tonight we’re kinda … we … »

He stopped and let the noise of the street wash over the two of you. You’d never seen him like that, and you didn’t know what to do about it. Hell, you’d never been alone with him. After a while, he took a deep breath and :

« A friend of us died last year, on this day. »

You probably stopped breathing. Whatever you had been expecting, that wasn’t it.

« And so, well, the thing is : he has a daughter. She’s gonna turn 17 in a month or so and well, let’s just say that for a number of reasons, we’re not gonna be invited to the birthday party. So we were wondering if, you know, since we like this place … »

« Frankie, » you stopped him, a hand shooting up on his arm to steady him as much as yourself because this was a lot of information. « Yes, you can celebrate her birthday here. Just make a reservation and if you want a special cake, ask Phil. »

He sighed, rubbed a hand on the back of his neck as his eyes fell on your hand. You removed it, and took a drag from your cigarette.

« Sorry, I probably didn’t need to tell you all of this but tonight, it’s … It’s a lot. »

You simply nodded, not trusting yourself to speak. What could you even say in that kind of moment ? You’d lost a grand-father, a few years back, and a great-grand mother sometime after but you never had to grieve a friend. And, a bit like that moment a few weeks ago when everybody grew awfully silent when you mentioned you were around for Jessie, you wondered what it meant that we’re not gonna be invited for the birthday party.

It was easy to forget they were ex-military, mostly because they never talked about it. You talked about Benny’s fights mostly, and, on that one occasion, about Frankie’s daughter, but you knew nothing about them, you realized. That’s what made that little fantasy thing you had going both with Anna and Jessie possible. But suddenly you had a sneak peek at something so very personal you didn’t quite know how to handle it. You didn’t quite know what it meant.

On a whim, desperate to lighten whatever that was, you asked :

« How’s Maria ? »

His head shot up at that. His smile was blinding.

« She’s perfect. »

You finished your cigarette, then, and allowed Frankie to take you by the elbow again. Before he let go, he squeezed and said, eyes heavy behind the hood of his cap :

« Thank you … Starbuck. »

This time, his smile was teasing and your own laughter couldn’t be contained.

#frankie morales x reader #francisco morales #Triple Frontier #francisco 'catfish' morales #francisco 'catfish' Morales x reader

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onceuponaloonatic · 4 years ago

Text

“Beach!” Saya yelled as she practically sprinted out of the car.

“Saya no!” Mina yelled as she also got out. It had been a long car ride, and Saya was seven, so it made sense she was desperate to get out, but Mina had tried to tell her not to run off already. She caught up to the child and picked her up, holding the squirming child in her arms. Saya was almost too big for being picked up, so it was a bit awkward to hold her, and she tried to use that to her advantage to run off towards the ocean. “Ka-san.” Saya whined. “You promised to help carry stuff from the car, remember Saya?” Mina asked, putting Saya down but keeping a firm grip on her arm to keep her tethered.

“Fine.” Saya whined dramatically. “Stop being such a drama queen Saya.” Sai nodded as she got out of the car, stretching her legs. She had been trapped in a car with Saya and Saki for hours and she was just about done with Saya. Saki had been fairly quiet the entire time, playing mario kart with Sai on their Switches. Saya had joined at first, but had quickly gotten bored and began making it the rest of their problem. Sai almost wished she had been in the other car with Sae and Nico, but at the same time she knew the carsickness car was probably worse than putting up with Saya’s whining about being bored.

“We’ve been in the car forever Unnie, I just want to get in the ocean already.” Saya pouted, following Mina to the back of the car. Saki was already there, still engaged in a mario kart race as she stood. Mina popped the trunk and handed Saya a small bag full of snacks before turning to Sai. “Can you carry something kinda big Sai?” Mina asked, the twelve year old nodding. “Of course Ka-san. I’m not a baby like these two.” “We’re not babies.” Saya pouted. “You are to me.” Sai giggled. “Saki as fun as mario kart is I need your help kiddo.” Mina turned to Saki, who sighed and put her game down. “How much further are Mom and Mama?” Sai asked as Mina put a bag with some towels in Saki’s arms. “They are already here.” Mina explained, grabbing a couple bags for her to carry. She shut the trunk and then led the kids towards the beach. “Really? How did they beat us? Mama said she was going to go slowly for Sae-chan?” Saya asked, adjusting the bag she was carrying. “We ended up taking a long time at lunch. Sae decided to not eat until we got here so she wouldn’t throw up.” Mina explained, looking around for her wives. Sana and Tzuyu had definitely gotten the easier choice. Sure Sae and Nico both got car sick, but it was better than Saya asking over and over again if they were there yet. “She’s probably pretty hungry so let’s find your Mom and Mama.” “Okay!” Saya nodded eagerly, looking around.

“Found them!” Saki yelled out when she spotted them, Mina smiling and leading them over. Sae was passed out on a beach towel, little white streaks of sunscreen still on her face as she laid in the sun. Nico was in Sana’s lap, being held by her mother while Sana attempted to read. Tzuyu was standing off to the side with Chaeyoung and Dahyun.

“Ai Unnie!” Saya yelled when she saw Ai, throwing the snacks down and running towards Ai, who was in the shallow part of the water with most of the other kids. “Eunji!” Saki yelled when she saw her, getting her attention from where she was building a sandcastle with Daehyung. “Ka-san can I go play with Eunji?” “Sure.” Mina nodded, watching Saki run off. Sai tossed the lawn chair she was holding down, going over to Sae and poking her. “Hey Sai.” Tzuyu smiled at Sai when she saw her. “How long has Sae been like this?” Sai asked, poking Sae again and getting no response. “Since we got here.” Tzuyu laughed. “You know she’s never liked the ocean.” “Hm…” Sana looked up when she heard Sai’s voice and smiled. “Hi Sai-chan! Hey Mitang.” Sana smiled at the two. “How was the drive?” She asked Mina as Mina moved to sit next to her on her towel. “Long.” Mina sighed. “Auntie Dahyun where is Kihyun?” Sai looked up at Dahyun, who was holding Haeun. “He’s playing with Ai in the water.” Sai nodded at the answer and ran off. “Hey Mina Unnie.” Chaeyoung greeted. “Rough drive?” Chaeyoung giggled at the other alpha’s demeanor. “Saya was bored and made it everyone's problem.” Mina sighed. “She always does that but it can be a lot when she has Saki and Sai to argue with.” “Well at least you guys got here right?” Sana giggled. “Where did you stop for lunch?” “Saya really wanted Hamburgers so we got that.” Mina explained, wrapping one arm around Sana and looking at Nico. “What about for you guys?” “It wasn’t bad. Haeun did have a little meltdown about halfway here so we had to stop for a bit but otherwise it was fine.” Dahyun explained. “Mina Unnie do you want a drink?” “Sure, what do you guys have?” Mina asked. “We have some water. Momo Unnie and Jihyo Unnie just went off to buy some more drinks and some food for the barbecue tonight.” Dahyun moved to get Mina a water. She tossed it to Mina, who happily accepted it. “Where’s Haeun?” “She went with Momo Unnie and Jihyo Unnie. She refused to be separated from Hina.” Chaeyoung explained. “Have you heard from Nayeon Unnie and Jeongyeon Unnie?” “No, but knowing them they are probably just running late.” Mina giggled. “Mom! Eunji and Saki are taking over my Sandcastle!” Daehyung yelled. “We are not!” “Should we go deal with that?” Tzuyu turned to Dahyun, putting her water bottle down on a towel. “Yeah.” Dahyun sighed. “We’ll be back.” Once they were gone Mina turned to Sana and Nico, watching Nico. “How was Nico?” “She was pretty good. She’s been eyeing the sand for a while but I’m sure it looks weird considering it’s the first time she’s seen it.” Sana giggled, closing her book.

“I’ll take her for a bit if you need a break.” Mina offered.

“It’s okay. We’re both good here.” Sana giggled. “Hey Mina Unnie I think Saya is trying to run out into the water.” Chaeyoung spoke up, noticing the way Saya was getting deeper and deeper. “Saya!” Mina sighed, chasing after her before she got into the water too deep. Sana giggled as she watched her wife chase after Saya. It seemed her energy was just getting more and more abundant as she got older.

“Saya has always been an energetic one.” Chaeyoung giggled, looking over to where Tzuyu and Dahyun were. It had seemed they got roped into helping the kids. “Oh yeah, especially now that it’s summer and she doesn’t have school to tire her out.” Sana giggled, adjusting Nico as the baby tried to reach for her necklace. “Haeun is similar. She may only be one and a half but she’s a ball of energy.” Chaeyoung laughed, leaning back from how she was sitting. “Dahyun’s mom says Dahyun was the same way at that age.” “I can actually imagine that perfectly. I bet little Dahyun was pretty cute.” Sana laughed. “She was. Haeun looks a lot like Dahyun did. It’s almost scary sometimes. When I told her that though she said she felt the same way with me and Dae.” Chaeyoung took a sip of her water. “Yeah we felt that way with Mina and the triplets and Sai. Well, Sae and Saya at least. Saki looks like her Mama. I think Nico looks a lot like Tzuyu, but she thinks Nico looks like me.” Nico looked up at Sana at the mention of her name. “I think I agree with Tzu on that one. Nico does look a lot like you.” Chaeyoung smiled at Nico when the baby looked over at her. She waved at Nico’s stare, smiling at the little smile Nico gave her. “You think?” Sana giggled. “Of course.”

When Momo and Jihyo got back, Nico was no longer interested in being still in Sana’s arms. She went over to the large towel Jihyo had set out for the little ones and crawled around with Haeun and Hina, trying her best to keep up with the older babies. About that time, Saki and Eunji both began asking their parents obsessively to play beach volleyball with them. Sana and Dahyun manage to get out of it by saying they need to watch the little ones and keep an eye out for a text from Nayeon and Jeongyeon. “Mommy you are hitting it wrong.” Momo was very amused by the look on Eunji’s face. They had started playing volleyball less than a year ago, but Saki and Eunji already were better than most of the adults playing, and they were telling them. “You aren’t supposed to hit it like that.”

“You too Mama. You are hitting it wrong.” Saki told Tzuyu. Saki and Eunji were on different teams, as the others had determined that was the only thing that was fair. You are supposed to hit it like this.” “Oh sorry Saki.” Tzuyu couldn’t help the giggle from leaving her lips. Saki looked so cute like that. “I’ll hit it like that.” “Saki serve it already.” Saya rolled her eyes. “Fine!” xx

“You guys finally made it.” Sana giggled when she saw Jeongyeon and Nayeon. Hyunjun and Seojun had run off in the direction of the volleyball game going on while Yuna held Jeongyeon’s hand, a popsicle in her other hand.

“Sorry it took a while.” Jeongyeon sighed. “We had to make a lot of stops.” “It’s not my fault.” Nayeon defended. “Yuna why don’t you go join the others?” “No.” Yuna nodded, sitting next to Sae, how was still asleep. “Volleyball hurts my arms, plus Oppas are both so competitive.” “Okay sweetie.” Jeongyeon giggled when Seojun waved her over. Nayeon decided to stay behind and unpack the stuff they got. “My babies!” Nayeon smiled when she saw the little ones. She picked up Haeun, how immediately giggled and latched onto Nayeon. “Hi Haeunie. Have you been good?”

“She’s been a little bit of a troublemaker recently.” Dahyun giggled. “Hina has been too from what I hear.” “Oh, the boys were like that at age as well.” Nayeon giggled, noticing how Hina wobbled over to her. Nico was still playing with a baby toy. “You three look so cute in your little swimsuits. Who's Auntie Nayeon’s favorite girls?” “You aren’t allowed to kidnap them, you know that right?” Dahyun joked. “I know.” Nayeon sighed dramatically. “Oh I forgot, I brought booze.” “Really Unnie?” Dahyun giggled. “Of course.” Nayeon looked up at the game of volleyball going. Considering the large age range the net was pretty low, but it was still pretty intense. “Alphas. So competitive.” Nayeon muttered.

“While Momo is keeping up with them pretty well.” Sana giggled. “She is super competitive for an omega. She always has been.” “Yeah especially since her and Jihyo are on opposite teams.” Dahyun pointed out. “Kihyun is like that too. A competitive omega.” “He is.” Sana giggled. “He’s cute.” “I know. He tells me he is a little intimidated being the only omega kid though.” Dahyun commented. “He hopes Sai is going to be an omega.” “She won’t.” Sana pointed out, looking at her daughter spike the ball. “She is definitely going to be an alpha.” “Yeah.” Dahyun giggled. “But he can hope, right?” “Right. Maybe some of the younger ones will be an omega.” Sana giggled. “I have a feeling this one will be.” Sana grabbed Nico and peppered kisses on her hairline. “She’s so needy and adorable. I love her so much.” “We love them all so much.”

#twice #sorry this is a bit jumbled #i'm sleepy #misatzu #minatozaki sana #myoui mina #chou tzuyu #kim dahyun #son chaeyoung #dubchaeng #mohyo #2yeon #this is a bit short oops

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dyaz-stories · 5 years ago

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Out of The Woods — One: Acceptance

It’s here!! You guys might remember this post of mine, and that is what this story is based on! I had planned to have everything done by Inukag week and... yeah that didn’t happen, but this is chapter one, the next ones will be based on prompts, though I definitely won’t have them all out this week. Let me know if you want to be tagged for this specifically (tagging everyone just for the first one) and I hope you’ll enjoy this first one!

Thank you so so much to @sweetchcolate for being my beta for this chapter, you helped improving the final result so much and you’re amazing ❤️

Tagging: @shinidamachu @sailorbabydoll92 @sweetchcolate @clearwillow @zelink-inukag @cstorm86 @digital-art-monster @danycontreras90 @redflamesofpassion @lost-amidst-the-stars @eternalnight8806-3 @desiree239 @keichanz @ashleys-canvas @mustardyellowsunshine @meggz0rz @contacting-u @ramen---boi @superpixie42 @kazeinori @disgruntledbeast

The full moon shone high in the night sky, its soft light falling on empty streets and tightly shut windows. The villagers laid restless in their beds, waiting for the morning to come, pretending nothing would be happening tonight, pretending that they didn’t know about the white form dashing through the trees in the forest, pretending they hadn’t left him an offering that was far more than they had ever expected to pay. Pretending that the moonlight was enough to repel the darkness.

In the forest, things looked very different. Even the midday sun hardly pierced the thick foliage, and the moonlight barely reached the ground. Unlike the village, the forest was full of life and movement, even at night. Small demons, animals, owls and bats… It was like they knew the humans wouldn’t venture in here tonight, and they intended to make the most of it.

Sometimes, however, the noise was interrupted for just a moment. Silence fell brutally on the trees, as a flash of white appeared, only to vanish just as quickly, letting the animals resume to their lives as though nothing had happened. The silhouette stopped in front of a clearing, sniffing the air, as it checked its surrounding. Once it was satisfied, golden eyes focused on a bag laying on the ground. Good. Relief overtook it for just a second, before resolve flashed in its expression, and it jumped in.

The action was only a matter of seconds. The form jumped in, easily threw the bag over its shoulder, paused, only long enough for an exterior observer to discern red clothing underneath long white hair, before he ran away, just as fast. A blink, and you could have missed it.

It didn’t stop until it had reached a small river. There, it took north, going up stream, the sound of bare feet on rocks barely audible over the brook’s whisper. Finally, the shape slowed down as the banks of the river started to rise to form a small ravine. After one last glance over its shoulder to make sure it wasn’t being followed, the white shape disappeared behind the rocks.

As it walked to a small wooden hut by the lake that had formed there, the moonlight revealed a definitely humanoid shape, an impression that was only disrupted by the two triangular ears on top of its skull. He unceremoniously dropped the bag onto the grass, only to freeze when a yelp came from the bag.

Slowly, he knelt down next to it. The moonlight caught onto claws, and they briefly shone in the dark as he prepared to open it.

Kagome didn’t regain consciousness until she was moving. She remembered the men, showing up in her house, dragging her out as she asked, begged, for an explanation. She remembered Mo, the leader of the village, telling her that he was sorry, that this was for the best, for everyone. She remembered the pain exploding in her temple. She remembered hitting the ground. And nothing after that.

She woke up, disoriented, unable to see, terror coursing through her veins, aware that someone was moving with her at full speed. Her stomach immediately protested against the up and down movement, and made it all the more difficult for her to fight her first instinct: to scream. She dug her teeth into her lower lip in order to keep from making a noise. Trying to calm herself down, she took a few quick breaths. That, however, only fueled her panic as she realized with horror how hard breathing through the cloth was, but she somehow managed not to have a complete meltdown. She could breathe, after all. It was just difficult. She focused on that for a moment, and used that to consider her situation.

It wasn’t easy to form coherent thoughts, not with the fear that was infecting her system, and certainly not with the fact that she could feel the youki of the person carrying her. Her reiki was always under control, and she had never had any problem with it, but as it was, it took everything she had not to let it spike. If she did, it could have disastrous consequences.

She swallowed, and forced herself to focus. What did she know? The men of the village had knocked her out, but clearly, she wasn’t with them anymore. She closed her eyes, both to calm down her breathing and to try to remember Mo’s words.

“I’m really sorry, Kagome,” he’d sighed, shaking his head dejectedly. “If there was any other way, I would choose it, but you’re the village’s priestess, and I know you understand why you must offer yourself in this situation.”

“What are you talking about?” she’d asked, tensed, not aware of the gravity of the moment yet.

Her eyes shot open as his words finally came back to her.

“I’m sorry,” he’d repeated. “I believe what we need right now is a virgin sacrifice.”

‘The situation’ had to be a reference to whatever lived in the forest. From what she’d been told when she had joined the village as a priestess, only a couple of weeks ago, in replacement for a distant cousin of hers who had been murdered, everyone believed it was a god that they had angered. They made regular offerings to it, once a month, on the full moon. And tonight was…

Gods. She was tonight’s offering.

She had just realized it when she felt herself falling, and let out a cry of protest when she hit the ground. She closed her mouth shut, but the damage was done already.

The silence that followed was excruciating. She felt the bag being lifted as though she weighed nothing, and she knew that it wouldn’t be long until it was open. Concentrating her reiki in her hands, Kagome prepared for a fight. She would not go down easily. She knew herself, knew her power, and she didn’t doubt that she would be able to take out a demon, even without her bow, if she had the advantage of surprise.

But, as she prepared to deal it a death blow, knowing that she wouldn’t have another chance, she hesitated.

Maybe she was being unfair. Maybe it was her fear speaking, and not her reason. Her work was not to inflict death. It had never been, and in fact, she had always held strong beliefs against that practice. Kagome knew that gods and demons could often be reasoned with, and that they would rarely go out of their way to attack humans unless provoked.

It was stupid, not to kill the demon instantly. An act of folly. It was taking a chance on something nonsensical.

Kagome took it anyway.

When the bag was finally pulled down, she held back her power, only sending a flash strong enough to make the demon jump back with a surprised growl. Sharp pain to her cheek told her she’d been hit, but she didn’t care as she stared at the supposed god that terrorized the village, and all she found was…

A young man. No older than herself, probably under twenty. Sure, his hair was white, his eyes seemed like liquid gold, and the dog-ears on his head weren’t human, but other than that— He was practically a boy. Skinny, almost to the point of being called scrawny, and his entire body tense as a bow string.

Kagome slowly lowered her hands, though she didn’t disperse her reiki just yet. The man kept growling as he glared at her, claws in evidence. His eyes moved over her clothes, a priestess’ garment, and the growl only became louder.

“What the fuck are you doing here? Where’s my food?”

Fear was soon replaced by anger, and Kagome shot him a death glare that would have made most men cower. He didn’t react to it — she hadn’t expected him to. Clearly, he was not ‘most men’.

“Oh I’m sorry, am I not a sacrifice satisfying enough?”

“Sacrifice?” he repeated with a frown. “The hell sort of sacrifice are you? Am I supposed to— eat you?”

People didn’t eat other people, did they? He couldn’t say he was tempted, even if she smelled a lot like fresh meat.

“No, I’m—” Kagome rolled her eyes. She had not expected to have to explain that part of the situation, and now it was weirdly uncomfortable. “They said they needed to make a— a virgin sacrifice. To appease you.”

A puzzled look appeared on the man’s face, and for a second, Kagome really feared that she would have to explain to him what a virgin sacrifice was. But then, his eyes widened in understanding, and, much to her surprise, his cheeks heated up. He glanced away from her, blushing and clearly embarrassed, which only made her feel more awkward.

“K-keh! So there’ll be no food this month?”

The question took Kagome off guard, yet again, and she was starting to realize that she really did not like that sensation. Why was she always one step behind? Something was wrong here.

“I… suppose not.”

For a few moments, there was only silence. He was crouching and glaring at her and she was trying her best to assess the situation, now that her fear was mostly gone, but she still was far from having enough information. First things first, then. Clearing her throat, she asked him about the thing that had been on her mind ever since she had felt his aura.

“You’re… not a god, are you?”

His lips curled to reveal his fangs, and his growl, which had stopped when she’d mentioned being a virgin sacrifice, picked up again.

“Are you making fun of me?”

His voice was defiant, and Kagome didn’t doubt that he would have attacked her if he hadn’t feared her powers. She swallowed as she looked him over once more. His youki was extremely powerful, so she had assumed he was a demon from the beginning, but now that she was looking at him, there was only one explanation that made sense. She hadn’t even considered it before, but the ears spoke for themselves.

“You’re a half-demon,” she said slowly.

“Gotta problem with that?” he snapped.

“Everyone believes you cursed the village,” she said, shaking her head, just trying to understand. She didn’t know how such a mistake had been possible. She’d only ever met Kikyo a few times, but based on what she’d heard about her power, there was no way she wouldn’t have been able to tell the difference. Maybe, maybe, she would have believed him to be a full demon, but she doubted even that.

“Sounds just like those assholes to blame their problems on me,” he mumbled bitterly. “Been blaming me for their priestess’s death, too.”

That caught her attention again.

“You’re Inuyasha?” she asked.

He almost jumped when she said his name, before focusing back on her. His eyes were shining dangerously, and Kagome resisted the urge to lift her hands defensively in front of herself. She didn’t want to risk escalating the situation.

“How would ya know that?”

“I was told that, on her deathbed, Kikyo said you were responsible for her final injuries.”

She watched his face crumble. The shock in his eyes, the way his lips fell. He whirled around, turning his back on her, but his reaction told her everything she needed to know. Having seen that— she couldn’t believe he had anything to do with her cousin’s death.

“She said that, huh?” he asked, voice sounding a little too loud and too clear. “Sounds just like that bitch. Keeping me her dirty little secret and stabbing me in the back last second. Nothing surprising about it.”

Kagome watched his back, silently. She didn’t know what to do. Didn’t know where she went from here.

“I’m Kagome, by the way,” she said, awkwardly.

That snapped him out of whatever emotion he was feeling, and he turned around.

“I didn’t ask,” he growled. “So ya said ya were— a sacrifice? Were ya okay with that?”

Her lower lip started to tremble, as it finally dawned on her what the men from the village had been willing to let happen to her. Whether they expected she’d be killed or— It would all have been horrible for her. The worst part was that she was pretty sure she could have been guilted into accepting it.

“Well, that’s humans for ya,” the half-demon said with a shrug, able to tell what the answer was from her silence.

Kagome forced herself to breathe in, but it didn’t help. She had been called to the village. They had asked for her presence, and she hadn’t thought much about it. She travelled a lot, usually going where she was needed. When they had called for her, she had assumed they wanted someone powerful, given what was living in the forest. She hadn’t doubted their intentions at all. Did they know then? Had they planned this all along? Did they think of it whenever they saw her walking through the village in her robes?

Inuyasha cleared his throat, right before she lost herself completely in questions she didn’t have any answers to, and she looked at him, blinking the tears away.

“What are ya gonna do now? Going back? Are ya gonna tell them that I ain’t a god and I haven’t cursed their village?”

He was trying his best to sound detached but, judging by his previous reaction, he did count on the offerings of food, which meant he did care about what her answer would be. She wanted to give him something, she did, but she didn’t know what to tell him. Even if he hadn’t killed Kikyo, he had injured numerous villagers who had ventured into the forest. She couldn’t find it in herself to feel bad for them right now, but he was still very much dangerous, even if he looked so young and normal. He could probably feel her reiki, and that might be why he hadn’t done anything to her yet. He might very well be waiting for her to lower her defenses to strike.

“I don’t know,” she admitted regardless, voice weak. “I can’t say I really want to go back there.”

The silence that followed was heavy and uncomfortable. Kagome wrapped her arms around her knees, pressing them against her chest, and finally let the reiki dissipate in the air. She would be able to summon more energy if needed, but it didn’t look like it. For now, at least.

“I guess ya can sleep here,” Inuyasha finally said, reluctantly. “’s not much, but it’s warmer than outside, and demons don’t come here.”

She could understand why. The air was infused with his youki, clearly marking the place as his territory. It made sense that other demons wouldn’t want to challenge him.

“…I think that would be for the best,” she said.

His reaction was less than enthusiastic. He sighed, obviously considering retracting his offer, then pointed at the hut with his chin.

“C’mon.”

Kagome pushed herself up, wincing at the sudden wave of pain that shot through her head, where she had been hit. If Inuyasha noticed it, he didn’t show it. In only a few large strides, he was in front of the hut, pushing the curtain that served as a door.

“You comin’ or what?”

Well, even if he didn’t kill her, he was pretty insufferable, Kagome decided as she followed him, walk a little wobbly.

The hut consisted of one room, with no furniture whatsoever. In a corner, there was some straw and what looked like a blanket, laying directly on the earth, and that was about it. It was not, by any means, comfortable, and Kagome found herself almost horrified at the thought that he lived here. These conditions were definitely not good.

“I told ya, it ain’t a palace or anything, but unless you wanna sleep outside, you should get your ass in here.”

Inuyasha’s annoyed voice — though Kagome was pretty sure she detected a hint of shame in there as well — finally got her to step in.

“You can sleep there,” he said, pointing at what was probably his bed.

“But what about you?” she questioned, concern filling her voice despite the fact that she wanted nothing more than to collapse on there to soothe her throbbing head.

In the darkness, with the only window in the hut being the sole source of light, she missed the suspicious glance he shot her. When he didn’t find anything in her behavior that should keep him on his guard, he merely shrugged.

“I’ll be good. I’m not like you humans, my body can handle a lot more.”

Kagome accepted his explanation, too tired to object that demons, while more resistant, still needed sleep.

“Well, if you’re fine with it…”

The only response she got was another shrug, so she slipped under the blanket and did her best to wrap herself in it. As expected, it wasn’t pleasant, but it was better than nothing. She watched as Inuyasha went to sit against the wall opposite her, putting as much distance between them as he could in this small space, and closed his eyes. She hesitated a second before rolling around, turning her back to him. Maybe it wasn’t the smartest decision, as she wouldn’t see him coming if he attacked her, but she knew she’d hate it if someone watched her as she slept.

Even with her exhaustion, sleep wouldn’t come to her, and the pain did not help. After a while, she rolled over again, attempting to find a better position to sleep. When she moved, she saw his eyes opening. It lasted less than a second, just long enough for her to see a golden flash, but it told her that he was keeping track of her actions.

It seemed that he was as weary of her as she was of him. The thought was almost reassuring. She wouldn’t attack him, unless he did first, and if he felt the same, well, they were both probably safe.

And with that thought, Kagome was finally able to find sleep.

When she stepped out of the hut in the morning, Kagome at least felt a little better. Her head still hurt, and the cut on her cheek stung, but she assumed she would be okay. The first thing she did was to examine her surroundings, something she hadn’t been able to do when she’d arrived at night.

There was something surreal about being here, in the middle of a forest she’d been told was inhabited by dangerous monsters since she’d arrived, and to see that it was, actually, a really normal place. The sun was shining bright in the sky, the birds were chirping in the trees. Today was looking like a beautiful day.

Looking around, she realized the hut was by a lake, in an enclosed area surrounded by cliffs. There was a small waterfall just a little further, making the river the only easy way out, though she assumed Inuyasha had other ways. The scenery was idyllic, in stark contrast with everything she’d imagined about the forest. Sure, she could feel youki all around her, even with Inuyasha’s so present, and she couldn’t forget that this place clearly wasn’t inhabited by humans, but it was all so… peaceful.

She heard a noise above her, and was startled when Inuyasha simply jumped down from a cliff. He landed with a grunt, and she took her chance to examine him as he pushed himself back up as though he hadn’t fallen from at least ten meters.

She hadn’t noticed in the night that he was dressed entirely in red, and that was not the only way he looked very different in the daylight. He went from a mythical being to— a person, simply put. She noted his sharp jaw, the hard glint in his eyes, the frown that she doubted ever left his face. When his eyes turned towards her, she glanced away quickly, then berated herself for her reaction. She hadn’t done anything wrong.

“Hey!” Inuyasha yelled at her, “I got some food for ya!”

Joining her, he hastily handed her some fruits.

“It ain’t much, but ’s all the forest gives at this time of the year,” he explained.

“It’s fine,” Kagome replied, forcing herself to smile. “Thank you for that.”

A look of suspicion passed on his face, and he had to bite back a comment. He didn’t like her behavior, not one bit. People were never nice to him. He definitely expected her to try some shady shit. Maybe she wanted something from him. He couldn’t figure out what for the love of him, but that would explain that ‘virgin sacrifice’ story she’d told him. After all, he’d never asked for that. Surely, those guys weren’t twisted enough to get that in their mind without any suggestion?

Keh. All things considered, he wouldn’t put it past them.

Humans couldn’t be trusted, after all.

“You should try to wash yourself,” he said bluntly as she bit down on a pear. “You reek.”

In fact, she smelled like animal blood. That was why he hadn’t been able to tell she was in that bag. Which was definitely weird and—

“Excuse me?” she protested, eyes wide. “I’m so sorry I didn’t have time to wash myself before I was given as a sacrifice, you—”

Was she insane? Did she think that, just because she was a priestess, there’d be nothing he could do to her?

“Whatever, wench,” he growled. “Should probably take care of your clothes, too, ‘cause it ain’t any better.”

Kagome didn’t think she’d ever been so insulted. It took a lot of her self-control not to shoot some reiki at him. She tried to tell herself that he had helped her so far, and that it was probably a bad idea, but damn if it wasn’t tempting. She folded her arms on her chest, self-consciously tightening her clothes around her.

“And what am I supposed to wear then, you pervert?”

The way his eyes widened as color rose to his cheeks his face told her that he had not considered that difficulty.

“That’s not what I— Ah, fuck.”

He quickly got rid of his haori and pushed it in her hands.

“Just get it done. I’ll be— around. Scream if a demon starts eating you alive or— something.”

With that, he was gone, and Kagome was the first surprised when she felt a grin lift the corner of her lips. She’d been told before that she trusted too easily, clearly she had, and perhaps this was another one of those situations, but Inuyasha just seemed weirdly… inoffensive. She didn’t doubt that he could be dangerous, however it was also strangely easy to forget.

Shaking her head, she walked to the lake, and found a place where she would be hidden by rocks to take off her clothes, before taking a deep breath and plunging in.

It was the middle of spring, and the water was biting cold, which didn’t stop her from immersing herself completely. As much as she didn’t want to admit it, Inuyasha was right about her needing a bath. She didn’t think she reeked — jerk —, but she didn’t think she smelled great either. She took the time to rub her body energetically, then to rinse and disentangle her hair. She was almost done and was about to start working on her clothes when she felt a disturbance in the forest’s youki.

She only had the time to look up before a giant centipede, with a woman’s chest and head, came out of the woods, screeching in a high-pitched voice. Instinctively, Kagome tried to reach for her bow and arrows, only to find them missing. She didn’t have time for anything else, so she moved as though she did have them at her disposal. With only her mind, as the Centipede was closing in on her, already opening its mouth wide enough to swallow her whole in one bite, she shot a reiki arrow.

The shot was unfocused, difficult to maintain, and it wasn’t nearly as efficient as an actual arrow would have been, but the creature was close enough that there was no way she could have missed it. Fortunately, purification was her strong suit, and the Centipede was destroyed in an inhumane scream.

Kagome remained there, trembling, frozen in place, unable to comprehend what had just happened. She was still immobile when Inuyasha burst into the clearing, jumping in the water in front of her, fully clothed.

“What the hell was that? What—”

His eyes widened and he spun around, though not quite quickly enough for her to miss the blush forming on his cheeks. Kagome slowly realized, while staring at his back, puzzled by his reaction at first, that it was because she was naked. That finally got her to move, and she wrapped herself in his haori, hands shaking so hard that she had to try several times before she made it.

She forced herself to breathe in. She’d fought and killed demons before. Sure, this time she’d been taken completely off guard, and she didn’t have her weapons here, but still. She’d been through worse. She couldn’t let this affect her that much.

“Wash your clothes,” Inuyasha ordered, though the effect was undercut by the fact that his back was still turned to her. “I’ll be closer, ‘kay?” Then, after a moment of awkward silence, he added “Good job on that one”, and took off as fast as he had the last time.

Kagome didn’t even have it in herself to protest his manners right now. She started to wash her priestess garment, with regular movements that she had done a hundred times before. Still, the Centipede’s scream kept replaying in her mind, and she couldn’t seem to shake off that horrible feeling she’d had when she had realized that her bow wasn’t there.

Despite all her efforts, her hands didn’t stop shaking.

Inuyasha watched the woman from above. Seeing his haori on her shoulders made him feel— weird, to say the least. He hadn’t expected her natural scent to be so pleasant for his nose, and he knew his clothes would definitely smell like her afterwards. Right now, though, the aroma from the mix of their scents was having more of an effect on him than he’d have wanted it to. Stupid demonic instincts…

It would probably only get worse if she chose to stay. He didn’t have much experience in that domain, because he hadn’t been in contact with many dog demons, or not for a long time, but it was likely he’d start to consider her part of his pack. Which meant he’d feel protective of her. Get attached to her.

He sat up with a growl at that thought. He knew he should have wanted her to leave, if only to avoid that. She was human, after all. She wouldn’t have the same instincts as him, and judging on how easy it had apparently been for Kikyo to stab him in the back, he didn’t have many hopes for that one.

Keh. He couldn’t believe Kikyo would have done something like that to him. He’d— Fuck, he didn’t know if he’d loved her, not when they’d spent so long openly distrusting each other, but saying that, on her deathbed? She’d really done him dirty.

And it sucked, because he hadn’t been able to mourn her. He’d been preparing himself to meet her, in the clearing when they found each other, when it had happened. It was like a refuge for them, a place where they just— sat, next to each other, and talked, ignoring their differences. She spoke a lot about not wanting to be a priestess anymore. He listened, mostly. Let her daydream out loud about a world where they’d both be simple humans. Normal.

It had almost made him want that, too.

But Kikyo had died, and the villagers had tried to kill him, almost succeeding that night, because they’d taken him by surprise, and he’d been all alone once more.

He swallowed, risking another glance at the new priestess. He should have gotten rid of her as soon as he’d realized she was a— a person. Should have made sure she wouldn’t be able to guide anyone to this place, and shouldn’t have looked back. However, even though she clearly viewed him as a threat, judging by that first shot of reiki she’d fired at him, she hadn’t commented on the fact that he was a half-demon. Her gaze had lingered on his ears, but outside of that, she hadn’t shown she was even aware of the implications of his status, something humans were usually very keen on reminding him.

That had gotten him… curious. Not hopeful, he didn’t do that anymore, but if she proved to be somewhat interesting, if she could dull the loneliness, even just a bit… Let’s say he wouldn’t be opposed to her presence.

He’d been alone for almost as long as he could remember. The memories of his mother had been fading, and he now tried his best not to think about it, because he couldn’t take that her face wasn’t as clear in his mind as it used to be. He clung to her scent, which he still knew, but he didn’t have much else, and when that’d be gone— He’d have nothing left. He knew it was stupid, to try to make new memories, hadn’t worked well with Kikyo and wouldn’t work with that one either, and yet he couldn’t help but try.

He could take being alone, had for years. He couldn’t take not having a single good thing, a single good person to remember. He just couldn’t.

Down there, the priestess was done with her washing and had laid her clothes on a rock, waiting for them to dry, and he decided that was his cue to go back down.

She jumped when he landed next to her. In other circumstances, he might have found that funny, but right now, he was just satisfied with her reaction. She should be afraid. This place was deadly, and ignoring it wouldn’t do her any good. If she was on her guards, it was all for the better. As long as she didn’t zap him with her reiki, at least.

“Is everything okay?” she asked, frowning, when he didn’t talk immediately.

Yeah. Fine. Just, there was this weirdly childish part of him that liked to imagine that she wouldn’t remember she was supposed to choose whether to leave or to stay today, and that she’d just end up… Well. Staying.

Like she could fucking forget something like that.

“’s all good. You?”

She shivered at the question, but quickly caught herself.

“I’m… fine. I didn’t think a demon would come here. Your youki is pretty powerful. I thought it would keep them at bay.”

“It usually does,” he replied, shrugging off her concern. “Could be ‘cause they smelled the blood, or ‘cause you’re a new smell. Some find reiki… tasty, I guess.”

She threw him a horrified glance, and he took offense at that.

“Calm the fuck down. I don’t eat people. Would be shit if you taste as bad as you smell anyway.”

Kagome rolled her eyes, reminding herself that she should not waste her energy on getting offended because this jerk implied she would taste bad. It just was not worth it.

“Men at your village did that?” he asked, pointing at the injury on the side of her head.

She had done her best to clean it, and she didn’t think the wound was infected. It still throbbed painfully, and it couldn’t possibly look good, but there was not much she could do about it right now.

“They did,” she replied, mouth dry. “They knocked me out before… You know.”

He did, and it still didn’t sit right with him. He wondered if they just wanted to get rid of her and were hoping he would do the dirty work for them, or if there was something else underneath it all, but he just couldn’t come up with an answer.

“So? You gonna go back there or what?”

She flinched, suddenly snapped out of her thoughts, and Inuyasha cursed himself. He was supposed to approach the subject carefully — or, ideally, not at all — and that just wasn’t the way to do it. Especially since he had this irrational wish that she would stay.

“Well, I clearly can’t for the moment,” she said, finally. “My clothes are drying, and I don’t think I feel well enough to travel. But…”

Inuyasha’s ears had perked up, which was pretty pathetic in his opinion, but at least she hadn’t noticed. That wasn’t definitive, not by any means, but it was something, right? If she stayed for a few days, he could perhaps— pretend. Pretend she was something for him that he could never even hope for. Pretend that, maybe, she didn’t feel sick and disgusted from being in his presence.

“But?”

“I just— I have nothing here. I’m not talking about the food, you can clearly find those things, even without the offering—” Inuyasha felt his chest swell with pride, as his instincts to provide for his pack kicked in. “—but there isn’t much I can do about the creatures here. I mean, I barely took down the Centipede, and you and I know it’s not the most dangerous thing to live in those woods, not by a long shot. Not to mention I don’t have herbs to take care of my wounds, or…”

“I know where herbs humans like grow,” Inuyasha interrupted her. “Can’t help you with picking them, don’t really know the difference between ‘em, but I can take ya there. I can go steal stuff from the village, too, but if you’re talking ‘bout your bow, I don’t think I’d make it to the temple. That’s usually under heavy guard.”

Kagome frowned, but nodded.

“I suppose I could learn to focus my reiki without it. It’s doable, in practice. If you know where herbs grow, that would be great, though.”

Inuyasha couldn’t help but think that there was something weird in the way she spoke to him. He was vaguely aware that it was because she talked to him normally, without calling him a monster, a half-breed, or an abomination every sentence, but there was something other than that. He couldn’t identify it as respect — he hadn’t been faced with it enough — however he could hear the underlying kindness in it.

That definitely played a role in him letting her stay, in walking her to the spot where herbs grew, later in the day, and in waiting around to make sure she wouldn’t get in trouble. It was rather nice, to have someone talking to him like that, he wasn’t gonna complain, that was for sure, and yet…

There was also something worrying about it. If she kept it up, it would probably get harder to endure the way others spoke to him, so, when he recognized it for what it was, he told himself he shouldn’t get used to it.

But fuck if he didn’t want to.

Days passed. Kagome was healing slowly but, though she appreciated not feeling pain every time she got up anymore, the idea was more worrying than pleasant to her. Every time she thought about it, and about going back to the village, she felt a pit in her stomach. She hated it. She had always lived to help others, devoted herself to it body and soul.

And they had betrayed her so easily.

She didn’t think she would be able to change her behavior, even after that. She knew herself well enough to be able tell that if someone was in danger, she would jump in without a second thought. She spontaneously took action for others. It was just who she was, what she did.

Now though, the thought of doing this for them was actively sickening. The thought that they would use her, would take advantage of her again, and the knowledge that she probably wouldn’t be able to stop them— it hurt in so many ways. She didn’t want to be the type of person who couldn’t trust. It was— She believed people were good. Maybe not entirely, and maybe they hadn’t always been, to her and to others, but all in all, she thought everyone deserved her help, her kindness. If they talked to her about their issues, she wanted to be able to listen to them and to believe them.

The idea that she might not be able to do that anymore was soul-crushing.

Inuyasha, as it turned out, wasn’t of much help when it came to her moral dilemma, and she hated that he had been the first recipient of her new-found mistrust. He didn’t deserve that. Clearly, he had been through enough already.

Not that he had talked to her about it. In general, they didn’t talk much. She’d tried to engage in some conversations, but he’d shrug her off quickly, take off in the woods, or close his eyes, leaning against the wall of his hut. She knew he could probably still hear her, because there was no way he fell asleep that fast, but she got the message, loud and clear.

It didn’t mean there was no communication between them, though. It wasn’t much, and he certainly didn’t make any grand gestures, but if she mentioned something, he’d make sure she would get it. It generally manifested in food, but he also stole some items she’d brought up. She knew she should have said something then, but she hadn’t found it in herself to berate him.

“Thank you,” she’d just said, genuinely grateful.

“Keh. If it can get you to stop talking my ears off, it’ll have been worth it.”

But she was starting to be able to read him, and even if his arms were folded on his chest, and he was frowning, she knew that when his ears perked up that way, it meant he was happy about the attention.

It was the cutest thing ever.

“You shouldn’t put yourself in danger by going to the village, though,” she’d added, genuine worry piercing in her voice. “I can make it without these. I really don’t want you to get hurt because of me.”

As most of their conversations, it had ended abruptly, with him rolling his eyes and growling “Whatever” before running off in the forest, and she’d let out a long sigh. Just once, she would have liked not to feel like a complete nuisance when she talked to him. Was that really too much to ask?

It wasn’t even like they could avoid each other completely, otherwise she would have given him as much space as he wanted. Instead, they lived together, in a really small space. He had taken to sleeping regularly outside, and when she’d voiced her concerns, because she really, really didn’t want to push him out of his living space, he had vaguely replied that he did that before she was here, that he liked sleeping in trees, and that she was overestimating her own importance.

Another extremely fulfilling conversation.

So Kagome had done her best to use the same language as him. She couldn’t be as silent as him, because she was the type of person to express herself vocally, and not with growls and grunts, but she could pick herbs and fruits, even if she still didn’t stray far from the hut, and she could kill small demons. So that was a start.

She did her best to pay attention to him silently, to avoid scaring him off, which wasn’t simple for her. It was obvious that he was used to a rough existence. There was no hidden softness in him. Whether in his body, all muscles and bones, or in his behavior, he seemed to treat everything with the same harshness, including himself. It was that very harshness that came out when he was talking to her. That became a lot easier to accept once she realized that it was just who he was and that it was very likely that he hadn’t received anything else.

She wanted to show him something else.

That turned out not to be such an easy task. He always pushed her away when she tried to show him kindness. She didn’t know if he just really didn’t like her, or if it made him uncomfortable for some reason. She didn’t want to impose anything on him, she just wanted him to know. Not everything needed to be so hard all the time.

When she was coming back from picking fruits, she found him knees deep in the lake, and chest bare. It wasn’t the first time, and she was pretty sure he had caught glimpses of her naked as well. Normally, she would have been uncomfortable with it, but her attachment to privacy had greatly diminished recently, so she just watched him from the corner of her eyes, absent-mindedly noticing his toned chest.

She heard him groaning in annoyance as he attempted to untangle his hair. His claws seemed to be doing a pretty good job at that, but it still looked like an unpleasant experience. She winced in sympathy for him, and then the idea hit her.

“Do you want me to brush your hair?” she asked, words leaving her mouth before she had really decided whether or not it was a good idea.

The look he gave her told her that it definitely wasn’t one. Yet, because she just didn’t know when to quit, she insisted.

“You got me a brush, remember? That would be a lot easier, and I would actually see what I’m doing.”

Inuyasha glared at her, and Kagome swallowed. She was pretty sure that was an argument she’d just lost. It was obvious, from the look in his eyes, that he was doubting her. Well, it would just be another failure to add to her list. No big deal, fine, whatev—

“Okay. But if you try anything funny, I’ll tear off your hand.”

“That’s great!” she beamed. “Just give me a second to get the brush!”

He was still eyeing her suspiciously when she came back, and she wondered what he thought she would do. Beat him to death with the brush?

She sat on a rock, and he took place between her legs, back turned to her. He tilted his head, and she got to work, an inexplicable grin forming on her lips. His hair was surprisingly smooth and silky between her hands, and it was a pleasant feeling underneath her fingers. After the first tense minutes, Inuyasha started to relax. His shoulders fell down, and she heard him taking in a deep breath, followed by a long exhale.

Her movements were slow, careful. Soft. Evidently, he didn’t mind the treatment.

“Can I touch your ears?” she asked, curious, after a while. She had wondered about them since she had first seen him.

“Don’t pull on ‘em,” he mumbled back, voice almost slurred, as though he was falling asleep.

She decided to take that as a yes. Hesitantly, she reached to take one in her hand, and let out a small exclamation when she found it feeling like real fur. Not just that, but it was pleasantly pliable, and she had to actively resist an urge to play with it.

Don’t, Kagome, she told herself. She didn’t want him to push her away again.

But Inuyasha didn’t say anything as she massaged them. Instead, he let out what she thought was a contented sigh.

“So,” he said, still with that half-asleep voice, “your injury’s better. Are ya, y’know, going back there? Have ya made your mind ‘bout that?”

Kagome froze and let go of his ears. She cleared her throat awkwardly as she took back the brush and got back to taking care of his hair.

“I’m in no hurry,” she admitted, voice small. “Why, do you want to get rid of me that bad?”

She had intended to say it as a joke, but it sounded desperate instead.

Inuyasha’s long silence after that only made her feel worse. If he was trying to find a nice way to say it, it was more than she had expected. She thought she would only receive bluntness in response, but she could take him at least not wanting to hurt her feelings too badly.

“…nah,” he said, so low she almost missed it. “Y’can stay a while longer. Or a lot longer. I don’t mind.”

That almost had her dropping her brush.

“Really?” she asked in disbelief. “You told me I was breathing too much of your air.”

“Didn’t mean that.”

“You said if I hurt myself when picking fruits, you’d me get eaten by the wolves.”

“I wouldn’t have done that.”

“You—”

“Ugh, fine, go, see if I care!” he finally exploded, standing up and stepping away from her.

He found her with a bright, wide smile on her face, and his heart skipped a beat.

He didn’t know he was capable of making someone smile like that.

“I’d love to stay,” she said softly. “I just didn’t think you’d want me to.”

“Well I told ya. I don’t care.”

“Actually,” she grinned, leaning forward, “you said you didn’t mind.”

“I meant I didn’t care!”

“Right.”

“I don’t care! I fucking mind if you’re going to be like that!”

Then Kagome bursted out laughing, and Inuyasha felt like he couldn’t breathe simply from listening to her. The laugh flew high in the sky, losing itself between the clouds, and Inuyasha felt lucky from having been there to witness that. Hearing her laugh. Certainly felt like an event in and of itself.

“Thank you,” she said, simply.

“Keh. You’re welcome.”

When she pushed herself off the rock to get up, he held out his hand for her. He didn’t know why he did, certainly couldn’t find a good reason, but he did anyway.

She took it without any hesitation, ignoring the calloused palms and the claws. This time, he felt like he could finally breathe, like she was injecting air directly to his lungs.

He could get used to that feeling.

#inuyasha #inukag #inukag week #kagome #kagome higurashi #my writing #out of the woods

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exhaustedfander · 5 years ago

Text

“Don’t Tell Janus” [Moceit]

This is based on a textpost I saw of drunk Patton telling Janus that he loved him then asking him not to tell Janus. I thought that was such a fun idea so I had to run with it. This gets kinda horny at the end, but there’s no smut. I’d love to hear what you guys think!

Word count: 3,797

A03 link

Seeing Patton intoxicated was a fairly new development in their friendship. It’s an odd thing to think about, all that’ve changed in the last few months. Janus had been more than a little surprised that Thomas had accepted him, but Patton? The physical embodiment of morality? He’d never been foolish enough to hope for such things.

Janus and Patton’s relationship had been fairly messy for most of their existence. When they were children things were far simpler, but even then, there was opposition. Janus had never gone far enough to claim outright hatred for Patton, not even when he might’ve deserved to do so. It was hard, even when they were so bitter to one another, to claim to hate someone who was usually so kind, so bubbly and full of positivity. There were instances where he’d longed to despise him, but there was always something about Patton that was so likeable and soft, despite what he tried to see.

For years he’d tried, in vain, to win Patton over to his side. Eventually he’d given up, determined to gain some kind of influence in Thomas’s life even if he did so despise by the others. In the end, it took Patton having a frog-related meltdown in order for things to finally sink in. Janus’s importance and everything he represented, as it turned out, was far more nuanced than Patton had ever allowed himself to consider.

Janus hadn’t expected Patton’s acceptance of him, much less his friendship. He had apologized to Janus for all of the hurt he’d caused him just as he’d apologized to Thomas. Janus had tried to rebel against it and not accept it so easily, but he couldn’t help himself. The way that Patton said it, so genuinely, explaining that he felt so awful for all that he’d put him through and that from there on out he wanted to include him more. For the love of God, Patton had hugged him, tucking him into a tight embrace and promising he’d do better by him with tears in his eyes, like he was devastated for the animosity that had festered between them.

And this wasn’t without consequences for the moral side, either. Things between him and Roman had been fractured to say the least, recently. It wasn’t like Roman and Janus were on any better footing; the princely side had been avoiding him like the plague ever since their sharing of rather unkind words. Quite the opposite, Patton had been seeking him out quite a lot.

Chats in the common room between them were beginning to become fairly routine, as strange as that was to admit. Janus was now invited to movie nights and for meals, even to the distain of others. He and Virgil certainly weren’t in the best place and he had been spending even more time with Roman recently to avoid him. Janus couldn’t believe that Patton would be willing to sacrifice so much to spend time with him. It just didn’t make sense.

It wasn’t as though he was complaining. His time spent with Patton was cherished and something he was growing to enjoy more and more as time went on. Janus was growing quite fond of the moral side, maybe more so that he’d like to admit.

He was by no means used to the physical contact that Patton provided him. Embraces were becoming very common, and in all honesty, Janus still wasn’t used to it at all. Being wrapped up in Patton’s arms, feeling far too safe, too warm. It spelled trouble, the way such things made him feel. But who was he to deny Patton a hug or two?

He should’ve. Surely, it would’ve staved off so much heartbreak if he’d been a litter firmer, more distant. If he had been an acquaintance rather than a friend, someone who was of little importance to Patton but played a role in his life nonetheless. For a long time he’d considered Patton a coworker, just as he considered the others to some extent, but things were shifting. He couldn’t call Patton that now; not after everything that had recently occurred.

Physical-contact was one thing but seeing Patton drunk was another entirely. Janus had been fairly surprised to find out that Patton liked to unwind with a glass of wine at the end of the day sometimes just as he did. As it turned out, he didn’t like to drink in front of the others, opting to do so when everyone else had gone to bed.

When Janus asked why, Patton had simply responded, bubbly as ever: “Oh I just get a little silly when I’ve had something to drink is all.” At the time, Janus had assumed that would be the end of it. If Patton didn’t feel comfortable drinking around the others than it was very doubtful he would behave any differently around Janus.

Except on Janus’s search for a late-night cup of tea he found Patton leaning against the kitchen counter, nursing half a glass of wine. He was about to turn on his heel and leave without his beverage before Patton spotted him and grinned wide as ever.

“Jan! C’mer, come talk with me!” Patton invited cheerily, his voice a touch too loud for the time of night. Janus considered leaving. Would keeping Patton company be rude, considering what he’d said? But then again…he’d offered him his company, rather enthusiastically in fact. And the idea of turning Patton down and upsetting him rather than staying for a while was far more unappealing.

“Hello, Patton,” Janus said as he strode into the kitchen and stood beside the moral side.

“Hey – you want some?” Patton said, gesturing to the bottle of wine sitting on the counter. Janus thought about it for a moment, noticing how Patton’s cheeks were already a tough too pink before deciding a little wouldn’t hurt.

“Sure, I suppose a glass would be fine.” Patton smiled at that, grabbing a wine-glass from the cabinet and providing a generous pour before handing it to Janus.

“Thank you,” Janus said, holding the glass to his lip and taking a dainty sip. Janus felt Patton’s eyes on him in a way he couldn’t ever recall them being. He was practically beaming on him, staring not with any kind of distaste but what Janus could only identify as unabashed fondness. The very idea was terrifying.

“So, do you do this often?” Janus asked, hoping the question might get Patton to stop staring at him like that, “Have a late-night drink, that is?” Patton shook his head, the action more forceful than necessary.

“Not too terribly often, no. Just something to take the edge of, y’know?” Patton said, taking a sip long enough to drain the rest of the glass. Janus noticed the way Patton’s hand trembled as he poured himself a second.

Ah, Patton was a lightweight, then. That explained why he didn’t like to have the others watch him while under the influence. To them, he was to some extent a father-figure and one who always wanted to do right by his “kiddos.” Perhaps he thought that being drunk and saying something “silly,” as he’d phrased it, could disrupt that somehow. Why, then, would he allow Janus to be with him now?

“I do,” Janus said, turning the words over in his mind. It was interesting to consider, Patton wanting to take the edge of. It wasn’t as though he hadn’t thought that Patton had just as many problems or stressors as the rest of them, it was just odd to contemplate, the fact that Patton was even telling him.

“And drinking alone helps? It takes the edge off?” Janus didn’t mean to sound cruel. It was just…sad to think about, really. Patton being too embarrassed to relax in front of the others, feeling like he could only do so by himself. Patton shrugged, the deep red liquid nearly sloshing out of his glass.

“I mean…yeah. It’s not always ideal – but that’s why it’s nice having a friend like you around! A drinking buddy!” Janus laughed at Patton’s enthusiasm, as well as at the idea that his presence was making Patton comfortable. That was reassuring, considering how long they’d had a distaste for one-another.

“Well then I’m happy to be of service,” Janus replied, only to find Patton clapping him on the back a touch too hard for his liking, the wine sloshing in his hand.

“Don’t say it like that. you’re not “of service” you’re – we’re friends. You’re my friend, I like having you around. I wish we’d been doing this years ago,” Patton said, sorrow blanked beneath the slight slur of his voice.

“I enjoy your company, too, Pat,” Janus said honestly, maybe too honestly, laughing fondly as he watched Patton set his glass down and hoist himself up so that he could sit on the counter.

“Oh! I see why Virgil likes this, sitting up here. And now I can do this,” Patton said with a giggle, reaching out and pulling Janus into a tight embrace, his legs wrapping around his waist. Janus stiffened, feeling every muscle in his body tense up. Patton was already incredibly affectionate while sober, but this? This was overwhelming, terrifying, even. Janus became hyper-aware of how hard his heart was beating, knowing it would be impossible for Patton to miss it what with him burying his face into his chest.

“Mm, you’re warm, an’ comfy, too. I like hugging you, Janny. Coulda been hugging you so long ago…” Patton had certainly never called Janus “Janny” before.

Patton trailed off, snuggling against him. Janus sighed, wrapping his arms around Patton’s shoulders and returning the embrace, despite the fear that was bubbling up in him. It was greedy, accepting this while Patton’s in such a state. He’d never be this outwardly affectionate if not for the alcohol, certainly not with Janus. Janus could feel the heat radiating off of the moral side as he peeked up from his chest and rested a hand on the left side of his face. Janus shuddered.

“Smooth, they’re smooth,” Patton said with a loopy smile, running his fingers along the scales slowly, “I always wanted to touch em. Can I touch em?”

“You already are, Patton,” Janus pointed out, not that it seemed like Patton was registering it.

“They’re cold, too. It feels so nice. And pretty. Have I ever told you how pretty your scales are, Janny?” Patton could feel the blood draining from his face, uncertain under Patton’s burning gaze.

“Uh – yes. Yes, I think you might’ve mentioned that,” Janus lied lamely, hoping it gets Patton to drop the issue. Patton shook his head.

“Nu-uh, I would have remembered that! Your scales are scalerific! Or something like that…” As it turned out, Patton’s sense of humor didn’t transfer over too well when he was intoxicated. Patton gasped as he lost his grip around Janus, nearly falling forward before Janus caught him and set him on his feet.

“I think it’s best that you go to bed,” Janus advised, taking the glass from Patton and allowing Patton to lean on him, his form noticeably trembling, “We wouldn’t want you to fall down, now would we?” Patton sighed.

"I guess not, but I must say I’m already falling for you,” Patton said, followed by a hiccup, “Gosh my head’s fuzzy…” Janus’s heartrate spiked at the joke, thinking, for a fleeting moment, what if? But such things were dangerous, and he knew that. Patton was drunk, and nothing he has to say should be taken too seriously.

Janus helped Patton down the hallway and into his bed, removing Patton’s shoes and cardigan. He snapped his fingers, placing Patton in a set of pale blue pajamas. It wasn’t anything Janus had ever imagined himself doing, tucking morality into bed, and yet here he was nearly losing his nerve enough to give him a goodnight kiss.

Janus had simply meant to help Patton to his room, but before he knew it he was tucking the blankets over him and placing a glass of water on the nightstand as well as some headache medication for the morning. He was about to get up and leave the room when Patton spoke, voice thick with exhaustion.

“You know, I like Janus. He’s so beautiful…” Janus froze, standing near Patton’s bedside, thankful he’d already shut the lights out.

“What are you –.”

“I love him.” The statement punched the air out of his lungs, nearly leaving him gasping for air. There was such a genuine, lovesick tone to Patton’s voice, as though he’d contemplated the notion of loving Janus for a long time and it was something he believed with the utmost sincerity.

“Don’t tell him, okay?” Janus didn’t know who Patton was convinced he was confiding in, he didn’t want to know. He needed to leave now, he needed to lie under the blankets and pray the memory away.

“Okay, Pat. I won’t.” Janus said breathlessly, walking to the door and shutting it. Janus’s back collided with the door as he slid to the floor, blinking back tears.

=+=

Janus slept very poorly through the night. Even in his fleeting moments of unconsciousness he was haunted by what Patton had said. I love him. he could still feel Patton’s hand against, the strangest mix of burning fire and tenderness he’d ever experienced. He should’ve left the kitchen when he found Patton, he shouldn’t have entertained his company, for God’s sake he shouldn’t have been stupid enough to fall for him.

Janus heard the sound of the others bustling around the kitchen and common room, but he stayed in bed, wondering how missed he would be if he just hid in his room for eternity. Surely if he tried it Remus would barge in and bother him, or Logan would tell him that he was being unproductive and not cooperating, or Virgil would make fun of him for being so useless, or Paton ��

He couldn’t think about what Patton might do.

He would stay here until he had the strength to leave and face anyone, to face Patton. That might take a millennium.

There were knocks on his door that went unanswered. Whoever was on the other end didn’t seem to care enough to check on him, which was just fine as far as Janus was considered. This was punishment for the fact that he’d been foolish enough to endear himself to Patton and he was paying a price most severe. For so long now he’d been ignoring the dull ache in his chest whenever Patton was around, but it could go unaddressed no longer. Not when the spark of a flame had become an inferno.

It was not a strict necessity for a side to eat, so Janus went without meals, deciding instead to stew in his misery. He’d been torturing himself in Patton’s presence, he realized somberly. Every brush against him, every embrace, every moment shared together hurt him a little deeper until those three little words drove him to agony.

This pain would eat him from the inside. Janus had wondered occasionally what it might feel like to be in love in the past. He’d never imagined it would be such a detrimental pain and he pitied those who sought it out. He pitied himself.

“Janus?” Patton’s soft voice on the other side of the door startled Janus out of a trance, disgusted to realize he’d been crying. Janus scrubbed at his face, untangling himself from the bedsheets.

“I haven’t seen you at all since…well, I’m worried. Can I come in?” Janus felt his pulse hammering in his ear, praying that Patton would leave him rot.

"No, I’m – I don’t want any company right now, thanks.” He cursed the weakness his voice betrayed. Since when had he been so pitiful?

"Janus, you’re hurting. I know you are, and I want to help, if I can. Please, let me in?” Janus sighed in defeat, knowing Patton’s persistence and damned good heart wouldn’t allow him to leave well enough alone. He’d stay there until Janus let him in, no matter how long that took. Keeping him waiting would only be staving off the inevitable.

Janus trudged to the door, pulling it back to reveal a terribly concerned looking Patton.

“I’m fine, Pat, nothing to concern yourself with,” Janus muttered, wondering how he’d ever been known as Deceit considering how abysmal that lie was.

“No you aren’t,” Patton said, his voice soft and sad, “I can see you’ve been crying…Jan, please, tell me what’s going on? Or don’t, if you don’t want to. I don’t want to pressure you it’s just…I’ve been really worried and trying to give you space but then you didn’t come out of your room for so long and I just…I had to come and check on you.” Janus sighed, walking to his bed and all but collapsing onto it. Patton sighed as he shut the door and sat beside him.

“I’ve done something to upset you, haven’t I?” Patton asked after a moment of bitter silence. Janus exhaled, his eyes landing on the floor.

“It’s not your fault. You don’t need to worry about it.” Patton shook his head, gingerly placing a hand on Janus’s shoulder, reminding him ever too much of how touchy-feely he’d been. “Of course I need to worry. I’m so sorry for whatever I said to you, Janus. I can’t even imagine; that’s exactly why I don’t like to drink in front of anyone. I get so silly. Gosh, I remember I touched your scales…I’m really sorry. I didn’t even ask, I was so rude.” Janus wondered if this would be his demise? Patton’s kindness, his apologetic nature despite the fact he clearly didn’t remember the things he’d said, didn’t mean them.

“It’s fine. As I said, you don’t need to worry about it. I know you didn’t mean it anyway.” And if Janus had ever had an oh shit moment in all his life, this was definitely it. Patton cocked his head, his grip on his shoulder tightening just barely.

“Didn’t mean it? Janus what – what did I tell you?” Janus swatted Patton’s hand away, half-expecting to demand Patton leave his room at any time now. He couldn’t take this kind of love, he hadn’t been built to carry it and at this rate he was bound to break down.

“Patton please, just don’t.”

“Jan, what did I tell you? I can see that you’re hurting. I don’t want to hurt you ever again. Please don’t let me hurt you.”

Janus cursed himself as he felt the tears welling up behind his eyes again, wondering when he’d gotten to be so soft. The others would laugh knowing he’d become so infiltrated with sentimentality and longing; he used to be so much stronger before this love.

“You…” he swallowed, wondering if half of the truth might suffice, “you said my scales were pretty. And you, uh, called me Janny, which you don’t usually do. That’s all.” After an uncomfortable moment of silence Janus dared to meet Patton’s eyes, finding, to his surprise, a great deal of terror flickering in them.

“That isn’t all, though, is it? I told you…didn’t I?” “Told me what?” Janus asked dumbly. He didn’t mean it. He couldn’t mean it…there was just no way.

“Oh my gosh, I did. I thought it had been a dream,” Patton said quickly, his voice pained, “And now I’ve made you uncomfortable. I was so excited we were finally friends, and I’ve gone and ruined it.” Janus’s mind was ringing out with What if’s and Maybe’s, the tiniest bit of hope welling inside of him. Patton seemed so frightened and sad, and despite all that he’d been feeling, it was horrible to see Patton in a similar state.

“Patton…the thing you told me, the thing you asked me to promise not tell, well, myself? Did…did you mean it?” Patton’s eyes finally met his again, glossy and wide.

“With all my heart.” And that, it seemed, was all it took to cut Janus lose from his nerves. He cupped Patton’s face in his hands, the skin warm and faintly pink with a blush.

“Me too,” Janus said finally, smiling wider than he had in what seemed like forever. Their lips connected hesitantly, just a brush before Janus felt Patton relax into the embrace, digging his fingers into his hair and pulling him closer. Janus hummed against Patton’s lips as the moral side depended the kiss, edging on desperate. The pair collapsed onto the bed, a tangle of limbs sharing frenzied, passionate kisses Janus hadn’t even dared to dream about before. Even if he had, this surely would’ve exceeded all expectations.

“I love you, Janny,” Patton said breathlessly as they parted pulling him close, “I really, really love you.”

“I love you too, Pat,” Janus gasped as Patton pressed an open-mouthed kiss to his pulse-point, his mind still reeling, feeling Patton’s hands on him. “I never thought – I mean, considering how things were for so long. Fuck, I’ve got to get you drunk again, I’d love to hear what else you have to say.”

“Language, sweetheart,” Patton scolded, peppering Janus’s neck with kisses that were going to be hard enough to leave a mark if he kept at it. Janus hoped he kept at it.

“You really think they’re pretty? My scales, I mean. Not – not that I care.” Patton giggled, moving so that he was straddling Janus and pushing him down into the mattress.

“Of course I do, cutie,” Patton said, pressing a kiss to the left side of Janus’s face, earning a moan from the deceitful side because, damn, he’d never imagined that would feel as good as it did. He ran his hand along the smooth scales slowly, stopping when he’d reached the collar of his shirt. “How far down your body do your scales go?” Janus arched his back to capture Patton’s lips in a burning kiss.

“Only one way to find out.” Patton grinned more mischievously than he’d ever imagined was possible.

“Oh, that sounds like an exscalent idea,” Patton said, barely giving Janus enough time to register the pun before his hands were on him again and Janus was very much doubting that this love would be his downfall. No, he would embrace this, nature these feelings as much as possible. Janus had never been one in favor of vulnerability but with Patton, he was fairly certain he’d bear every ugly, wretched part of his soul if it meant he could have him.

Janus would always be thankful he’d walked in on Patton in the kitchen, thinking of all he’d be missing out on if he hadn’t.

=+=

#Moceit #romantic moceit #Janus Sanders #Patton Sanders #Janus Deceit Sanders #Deceit sanders #hurt/comort #angst #fluff #angst/fluff #love confession #drunk love confession #my writing #sammy writes

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iamtrebleclefstories · 4 years ago

Text

The Little Bit of Hope I Cling To - Part 4

Izzie goes to Grey Sloan in hopes of seeing Bailey, Meredith, or Alex. She meets Dr. Karev instead.

the end of the road

Part 4

——————

The months following were smooth sailing, until they weren’t. Jo was about seven months in her pregnancy when it seemed like everything had gone to shit. Izzie got sick again and was back in a hospital bed undergoing multiple treatments and would be undergoing a resection for new mets that appeared along her small intestine.

Everything had been going so well. Izzie had been hired by Alex as a full time neurosurgeon at Grey Sloan, Geo was thriving in his school and enjoying have “cousins” to play with, even Piper—the damn dog—was happy.

That’s why Jo was so pissed. For months, she’d been working tirelessly on her fellowship research to find a breakthrough that could maybe save Izzie’s life and stop the spread of her cancer. Finding out that the cancer was back was like a punch in the gut for all the time Jo had spent trying to come up with a solution. It was made increasingly difficult by the fact that Jo had become friends of sorts with her husband’s ex-wife. They had forged a friendship from the most unexpected of circumstances and it was one that Jo was grateful for.

Jo’s impending motherhood didn’t help the situation either. She knew that she’d be going on maternity leave in a few months, but what would that mean for Izzie? Jo couldn’t just stop now. Not when Izzie needed her the most.

She’d been sitting in the attending’s lounge with her head in her hands when she heard someone shuffle through the door.

“Hey.”

Jo looked up to find Link standing in the doorway. She gave him a small smile, “Hey.”

“You okay?”

“Nope,” Jo laughed dryly. “I’m stressed and tired and my feet hurt and I just need to figure out this medical breakthrough so that a woman that I’ve grown to care about doesn’t die.”

“So... just another Thursday, right?” Link quipped sarcastically. He sat down next to Jo and put a comforting hand on her shoulder. “Look, I know you feel like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders, but it’s not all on just you. Whether you figure it out or not, it doesn’t make you any less of a good doctor. It doesn’t mean that you didn’t try your hardest. You are going to run yourself to the ground if you keep going at the rate you’re going, and I know that can’t be good for the baby.”

Jo let a tear slide down her cheek, “I know... I just wish there was something more I could do. I’m running out of options. She’s my patient and it’s my job to help her, but she’s also become the most unlikely friend. I just... I don’t want her to die.”

“No one wants her to die. But if she does, it won’t be your fault. It won’t be because you didn’t try hard enough. It’ll be because she had cancer and try as we might, sometimes the cancer wins. Regardless of who wins, you have given her time. Time she wouldn’t have had if she never would came to this hospital looking for old friends and instead stumbling upon you. She gets time and a chance to fight because of you. Don’t forget that,” Link pulled Jo in for a sideways hug. “Now, dry up those tears and go to her room and tell her what’s next in your plan to try to save her life.”

Jo chuckled softly, “Thank you.”

“That’s what I’m here for,” Link shrugged. “Seriously though, you’re gonna wanna wipe your face. You’ve got some mascara running down your face.”

“Shut up,” Jo rolled her eyes and stood to look in the mirror. Yikes. She did look pretty wrecked. She grabbed a tissue from the box on the coffee table and began to blot her face.

Satisfied with her appearance, Jo said goodbye to Link and made her way down to Izzie’s hospital room. As she approached, she saw Alex with Geo on his lap and Meredith talking to Izzie as she knitted a scarf. Smiling, Jo knocked on the door as she walked in, “Hey. I see you have some company.”

“Jo! We were just talking about you—oh my goodness... your belly looks absolutely precious today,” Izzie beamed brightly.

“Thank you,” Jo nodded gratefully and looked over at Alex who was staring at her with love in his eyes.

“Oh! You see, that’s the look. The one we were talking about,” Meredith pointed at Alex.

“What look?” Jo scrunched her face.

“The lovey-dovey look Alex gets on his face anytime you walk into the room. It’s like he worships the ground you walk on,” Izzie teased, a wide grin on her face.

“Yup,” Meredith nodded. “The look of complete and utter adoration.”

Geo looked in between Jo and Alex briefly before agreeing, “Uncle Alex looks at you like you’re the most pwetty thing ever to exist!”

“That’s because she is,” Alex ruffled Geo’s hair, causing the young boy to erupt into a fit of giggles. He looked up at Jo again, “How are you feeling?”

“Good... a bit tired and Link may have just witnessed me have a hormonal break down in the lounge, but mostly good,” Jo ran a hand over her swollen stomach. “Baby is kicking a lot today.”

“Can I feel?” Geo asked excitedly, jumping up from his spot on Alex’s lap. “Pwetty please?”

“Sure,” Jo smiled at the boy and guided his little hand up to where the baby’s feet were. “You feel that thump? That’s the baby.”

“Woah,” Geo’s eyes widened in wonder. “This is so cool!”

“It is pretty cool isn’t it?” Jo winked at him. “What’s even cooler is that in a couple months, the baby will be here and we’ll get to hold and cuddle him or her all day long.”

“I can’t wait to have a baby cousin,” Geo looked over at Izzie. “It’s something happy and we need all the happy so mommy can get better.”

“You are so right, Geo. A big part of your mommy’s recovery is going to depend on her being very strong. Happiness gives us something to hope for and it makes us oh so very strong,” Jo replied.

The three other adults watched the scene unfold with smiles on their faces. Izzie turned to Jo, “You are going to be a wonderful mother. I can tell.”

“Thank you,” Jo reached over and squeezed one of Izzie’s hands. “I wanted to come in and tell you that I’m actively making plans for what to do next. Right now, surgery is still our best option, but I’m doing everything in my power to figure out something else. Until then, you’ll continue with the IL-2 treatments to shrinks those mets down as much as possible. I want to do the resection in a week from today.”

“Sounds good,” Izzie nodded. “Enough about me, someone tell me something happy or funny to help me distract myself from the fact that I’m stuck here while everyone else is performing surgery. Ooh! Like have you guys figured out a name yet?”

“Not yet,” Alex shook his head. “We haven’t really had a chance to sit down and talk about names. Hell, we don’t even know if it’s a boy or a girl.”

That was true. Originally, Jo and Alex were going to find out the sex of the baby, but at the last minute chose to wait and be surprised. It was exciting and made it even more fun when people tried to place their bets on the sex of the baby.

“You better hope for your sake it’s a boy, because if you have a little girl who looks like Jo, that’s it. You’re a goner,” Meredith smirked

“Oh I can see it now,” Izzie laughed. “Alex freaking out because she’s going out on date when she sixteen.”

Alex scowled, “Shut up. We’re no where close to that so we’re not even going to think about it.”

“You see? He’s going to have a complete meltdown if that baby is a girl,” Meredith pointed at Jo’s bump. “What do you think it is Jo?”

“Honestly, I haves to clue. It’s changes every day. Today I’m feeling boy, but I’m a couple hours from now I might think it’s a girl.”

“Well, if you guys decide to go with the theme of naming your babies after a loved one, just remember that no one has named a baby after me yet,” Meredith grinned slyly.

“Shut up,” Alex threw a paper cup in Meredith’s direction, causing the three women to laugh.

***

“Helen, I swear I’m fine,” Jo insisted as she walked into the hospital, her mother in law trailing behind her.

“No you are not,” Helen frowned. “I know that I’m not entirely mentally stable, but Jo, I gave birth to three children. I know what labor looks like. You are having contractions.”

“They’re Braxton Hicks,” Jo tried to explain. “Besides, I am only thirty five weeks. I have a whole month before the baby is supposed to be born. I haven’t even gone on maternity leave yet.”

“Now I see why Alex called me,” Helen muttered under her breath. “Okay, fine. Maybe you aren’t in labor but you need to slow down.”

“Trust me, Helen, I would love to, but I can’t. I have patients to take care of and my research. I can’t afford to stop now. Not when I’m on the brink of something that could save many lives. Not when Izzie Stevens is finally getting discharged again today,” Jo said as Helen followed her into the attendings lounge.

Truthfully, Jo was in pain. She’d been having contractions ever since four in the morning, but did her best to ignore it. She was tough. She could handle a little pain and discomfort. It wasn’t time yet.

“Wait, is this the ex-wife Izzie Stevens?” Helen made a face at the information, while Jo changed into her scrubs. “Alex mentioned that his ex-wife was here getting treatment. You’re her doctor?”

“Yes,” Jo nodded as she pulled on the scrub top and fluffed her hair out.

“You are a saint,” Helen shook her head.

“She’s really not that bad,” Jo turned to Helen. “I’m going to round on her right now if you want to join me.”

“Might as well,” Helen shrugged. “I promised Alex I’d stay with you today.”

“Alex needs to calm down. Worrying like that is just going to give him more gray hair than what he already has. I am fine. The baby is fine,” Jo walked out the lounge and into the hallway in the direction of Izzie’s room.

Just as they were about to walk into Izzie’s room, Jo was hit by a powerful contraction. She took a deep breath and grabbed onto the doorway, exhaling in pain. She shook her head and proceeded into the room.

“Hey Izzie,” Jo greeted and smiled when she saw Geo. “Hello to you, too Geo. Aren’t you supposed to be in school?”

“Yes he is, but mommy decided to let him skip because she’s leaving the hospital today,” Izzie grinned.

“That’s right! I checked all of your levels and your most recent scans, and I feel very good about discharging you today,” Jo shared the good news. She turned and motioned for Helen to walk in, ignoring another contraction. “Iz! This is Alex’s mom, Helen Karev.”

“Hi,” Helen gave Izzie a wary smile.

“Oh! Hi, Mrs. Karev, it’s so nice to meet you,” Izzie shook Helen’s hand. She looked over at Jo. “I didn’t know that he introduced you to his mom.”

“Yeah, we met just a couple weeks before the wedding. Went out to Iowa to visit,” Jo recounted. “Alex called her and flew her out here to be the pregnancy police.”

“He did not ask me to be the pregnancy police,” Helen rolled her eyes. He’d mentioned that your due date was approaching soon and I told him that I wanted to be here to see you before you gave birth, so he came to Iowa and flew out here with me. He said he’d do the same once the baby was born. But it looks to me like he won’t have to make the second trip because you are having contractions every three minutes.”

Jo’s eyes widened as she realized that her mother-in-law had been measuring the time between her contractions, “They’re three minutes apart? They’re coming steady?”

“Yes, honey. Like I said ever since we left the house, you are in labor,” Helen reiterated and placed a hand on Jo’s shoulder. “You need to cancel the rest of your day.”

“No, no, no. I am not having this baby right now,” Jo shook her head stubbornly. “It’s two early. He or she has still got to cook for five more weeks. Their lungs still need a few more weeks to develop, they don’t have enough body fat to regulate temperature yet, and they won’t be strong enough to breastfeed. So, this baby is staying inside.”

“Um... Jo,” Izzie called out. “You’re bleeding.”

“I’m what?” Jo looked down to see a dark streak running down the leg of her scrub pants. She clutched her stomach in pain again. “Oh, crap. Call Alex and Meredith.”

“Geo, run to the nurses station and tell them that we need a wheel chair for Dr. Jo and that they need to page Uncle Alex right away. It’s an emergency,” Izzie instructed her son, who nodded and ran out into the hall. She carefully stood up from her bed and walked over to where Jo was leaning against the wall. “Okay, you’re going to be fine. Jo, how about you let me feel your belly?”

Izzie felt around for a minute before scrunching her eyes in concern, “Alright, keep in mind that I am a neurosurgeon and I’m not exactly sure that this is what’s going on, but I think your placenta ruptured. There shouldn’t be this much blood.”

“Is there anything I can do?” Helen asked worriedly.

“Just hold her up while I find Geo with the wheelchair,” Izzie rushed out of the room and found her son walking next to a nurse strolling a wheelchair. “Did you page Alex Karev?”

“Yes,” the nurse nodded.

“Okay, you also need to page OB and Meredith Grey. I think Jo’s experiencing placental abruption and she may need to undergo a crash C-section.”

“I’m on it.”

***

The following minutes were a frenzy of activity as Alex—who’d been elbow deep in a kid’s body cavity—was notified of his wife going into preterm labor. He got tagged out by Bailey and ran out to find Meredith standing outside the OR board, trying to figure out which OR they’d taken Jo to.

When they got to OR 2, both Meredith and Alex were happy to find that Jo was not alone. Standing there holding her hand was Izzie, who was muttering soothing words to her, “Everything is going great so far. You are doing good, the baby is okay, and Alex is on his way.”

“I’m here!” Alex announced as he came up beside Jo and placed a kiss on her forehead. “Hey, I’m here.”

“Oh thank God,” Jo breathed out a sigh of relief. “This wasn’t the plan. God, Alex this wasn’t the plan.”

“When the hell have our lives ever gone to plan?” Alex chuckled light. “It’s okay, because we caught in time and in a few minutes we’re going to have a beautiful baby.”

“Where’s Meredith?” Jo called out.

“I’m right here Jo,” Meredith walked up to where Izzie had been sitting my Jo’s head. “We got this, thank you.”

“Oh. Yeah... no problem,” suddenly, Izzie felt very out of place. For the first time in the months since she’d returned to Seattle, she felt like an outsider looking in. “Okay. I’m going to go sit with your mom, Alex. Keep her some company.”

“Thank you.”

***

A little over an hour had passed when Meredith finally came out to the waiting room on the Labor & Delivery floor. She wore a bright smile on her face, “Mom and baby are just fine. There was some bleeding but we got that under control and Alex stood over the peds fellow’s shoulder making sure that the baby was fine.”

“Oh thank God,” Izzie let out a sigh of relief. “They’re both okay?”

“Yes,” Meredith nodded. “The baby’s lungs are fully developed. She might have to stay in an incubator a couple nights to regulate her body temperature, but she’s healthy.”

“Did you say she?” Helen asked.

“I did. It’s a girl.”

Izzie laughed, “Oh my God. I knew it! Please tell me she looks exactly like Jo.”

“She’s a carbon copy,” Meredith joined Izzie’s laughter. “I would’ve thought Jo’s cloned herself if it weren’t for obvious mop of hair on her head that definitely came from Alex.”

“Can we go see them?” Geo pulled on Meredith’s scrubs. “Pleaseeeeee!”

“Yes, you can go see them. That’s why I came out to get you,” Meredith extended her hand out to the little boy. “Come on, follow me.”

They walked down the halls of L&D until they finally found themselves outside a room. Somewhere along the way, Amelia, Link, and Bailey had joined them. Meredith knocked on the door before walking in, “I brought some visitors.”

Jo and Alex looked up from the tiny pink bundle in their arms to see their friends—their family walk into the room. Alex grinned widely as he held his daughter in his arms and stood up to greet everyone. He was jittering with excitement, “Dude, I’m a dad!”

The room erupted into laughter. Amelia chuckled, “Yeah we know.”

There was a shuffling by the doorway as someone pushed their way through, “I’m here! I was in surgery. Did I miss it?”

Maggie burst through the door eyes wide, struggling to catch her breath, “Oh my God. It’s a girl!”

“Yes, it’s a girl,” Jo sighed dreamily, very clearly in love with the child in her husband’s arms.

“She’s absolutely beautiful,” Helen fawned over the small child. “I have a granddaughter!”

“Well? Are you going to tell us her name?” Bailey asked expectantly.

Alex and Jo exchanged a look before answering simultaneously, “Taylor Joy Karev.”

“TJ for short,” Jo added.

Izzie watched as everyone—her son included—took their turns meeting and holding the precious little newborn. It was a sweet moment, one that she thought she’d never get to see. It was... odd, seeing her ex-husband and his wife welcome their child into the world. It was odd being a part of the process. It was odd that they let her in after the history between her and Alex.

Jo must’ve noticed Izzie’s detached expression because soon, Izzie was being pulled out of her reverie by Jo’s concerned voice, “Izzie, are you okay?”

“I should be the one asking you that,” Izzie winked. “You scared me a little there. But of course Taylor had to have a dramatic entrance into the world, she’s a Karev after all. Already like her father in that way.”

“She’s been in this world for two hours and she already has him wrapped around her little finger,” Jo mused quietly, looking at her husband helping the Geo and the other kids—who’d been brought over from school—hold their newest cousin. “I don’t blame him, though... I didn’t think I could love anyone this much. I didn’t think I’d ever love anyone more than I love Alex, but this little girl... she’s everything. Absolutely everything.”

“I know exactly how you feel,” Izzie sat down on the edge of Jo’s bed. “When I saw Geo for the first time, my heart cracked wide open. It didn’t matter that I hadn’t given birth to him. I knew he was mine and I was his. Not a day goes by where I’m not grateful for every second I get to spend with him. Especially, since my cancer returned.”

Izzie paused and thought carefully about her next words, “I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for you. I wouldn’t alive right now. But I also, wouldn’t be here in this room, surrounded by friends watching my ex-husband hold his newborn daughter if it weren’t for you. You have helped me mend broken relationships and have given me a community again. And that’s all because of you. God knows they wouldn’t be as welcoming to me if it weren’t for your genuine care and compassion. So thank you, for giving me life back.”

About halfway through Izzie’s short speech, Jo felt a couple tears slip her eyes. She tried to wave it off as the hormones, “You’re welcome. Thank you for staying with me until TJ was born.”

“It was my pleasure and honor,” Izzie squeezed Jo’s hand lightly, marveling at the shift in roles. For the first time, Jo was in the hospital bed and Izzie was standing about it. “It’s weird seeing you in a hospital gown instead for scrubs.”

“It’s weird being in a hospital gown,” Jo answered. She observed Izzie for a minute. “Are you okay? You got discharged today and instead ended up getting me to an OR in time so that I didn’t lose too much blood.”

“I’m good. Honestly, I feel really good,” Izzie assured. “I know I’m not better yet and I know that I’ve still got to fight, but things like these... things like these remind me that I have so much to fight for. I want this. I want to be here and watch TJ grow. I want to see Zola, Bailey, and Ellis grow. I want to see my son grow and I want to have another kid. I want to marry someone that looks at me the way Alex looks at you, or Ben Warren looks at Bailey. So as long as I have left, I’m gonna keep fighting for those things.”

Alex—who’d heard the tail end of the conversation between the two women—walked up with baby Taylor resting comfortably in his embrace, “And we’re going to help you do that.”

Jo nodded in confirmation, “Anything you need, we’re here.”

“Thanks,” Izzie smiled and finally turned her attention to the small child. “Okay, it’s Auntie Izzie’s turn to hold this little one. Everyone else got a turn except for me.”

Alex handed the baby over and Izzie grinned widely when she finally got a good look at the little girl, “Oh, Alex. You are in so much trouble.”

“Why?” Alex scrunched his face in question.

“Because she’s gorgeous and looks exactly like her mother. And with the parents she has—ha, I cannot wait to see what kind of trouble she gets herself into,” Izzie laughed. “Let’s just pray she doesn’t take after you and your... wild side.”

“Oh God, no. Nope,” Alex shook his head. “She’s not allowed to even look at a boy until she’s thirty.”

“Okay,” Jo snorted in amusement. “You’re just terrified because now you finally realized that you ten years ago, was every father’s worst nightmare.”

“God, I’m gonna pay for that, aren’t I? This right here, this little girl is karma for all of the terrible things I did throughout the years,” Alex’s eyes were wide in terror.

“Yup,” Izzie hummed and cradled the little one closer. “I’m happy for you guys. Truly.”

“Thank you,” Alex’s face curved up into a crooked smile. “I’m glad you’re okay.”

“You’re going to stick around right? You’re not leaving Seattle or anything?” Jo asked.

“I’m sticking around,” Izzie took a deep breath. “Years ago, I told Mer that this was just a place I worked, but I was wrong. This is home. This is family."

***

Five Years Later

“TJ! Get your butt in here right now!” Jo yelled as she tripped on a pile of toys in the living room. She waited until she heard the pitter-patter of feet signaling her daughter’s appearance. “What have I said about leaving these on the floor. Someone can get hurt.”

“Sorry mommy!” TJ’s little eyes widened in apology.

“It’s okay baby, just pick them up when we get home later. Right now we have to go. We’re going to be late,” Jo reached out her hand and led her daughter out the house.

When they reached the car, she saw Alex fiddling around in the backseat. Jo smirked, “Having some trouble there?”

“I can’t get this stupid seat belt over her dress,” Alex grumbled. “Was this really necessary?”

“You know how Izzie is. Everything has to be perfect. Here let me do it,” Jo chuckled as she pushed Alex aside to look at the three year old girl that Alex was struggling to strap in. “Hi, Bella Mae. You look so beautiful. Mommy is going to help you get all strapped in because Daddy is having some issues.”

“Daddy habbin’ issues,” Bella giggled quietly. “I wike my dwess.”

“I like your dress too,” Jo complimented the little girl. Jo smoothed down her daughter’s dress as she buckled her into the car seat. Bella was her goofy, energetic kid. Rather than being a carbon copy of her mother like Taylor was, Bella took after the Karev side. Alex constantly talked about how Bella reminded him of his sister, Amber when she was a little girl. Bella and Alex had the same big brownish-greenish eyes and crooked grins. “Alright, Bells. You are all set.”

“Tank you, mommy!”

“You’re welcome,” Jo kissed the little girl’s forehead.

Finally, Jo turned over to the little man that was sitting in between his two sisters. Wyatt Alexander Karev was a cubby two year old that was the perfect blend of both Jo and Alex. It was hard to determine where features of one parent ended and the other began.

Wyatt gave Jo a cheesy smile, “Mama!”

“Hi munchkin! You look so handsome,” Jo ruffled his little curls.

“Tanks mama!”

“You ready?” Alex asked as he rounded the car.

“Yeah. Let’s go,” Jo nodded and thanked Alex as he opened the door for her and helped her inside the car.

When they arrived to the venue, Alex and Jo hurried to take the kids out of the car and walk in the direction they had been told. Standing outside the room, Jo knocked on the door.

“Come in!”

The family of five walked in to see Izzie standing in an ivory gown with a giant smile on her face, “Oh thank God you’re here. I was worried you’d be late.”

“I can’t be late, I’m the maid of honor,” Jo pulled Izzie into a hug. “You look amazing. Decker isn’t going to know what hit him when he sees you.”

“Jo’s right. You look hot, Iz,” Alex grinned widely. “You’ve still got it.”

Izzie rolled her eyes, “Thank you.” She let out a shaky breath. “I’m kind of nervous.”

“Do you want to make a run for it?” Alex asked. “I’ll tell Mer to gear up the getaway car. We’ll leave the kids with Maggie and Amelia and the the four of us will be out of here before anyone notices.”

“No I don’t want to make a run for it. Can’t a girl be nervous? Weren’t you nervous to get married?” Izzie made a face.

“Nope,” Alex shook his head.

“Seriously? You didn’t get nervous? Not even when you married me?” Izzie’s face was painted with disbelief.

“When I married you, it was so last minute, I didn’t have time to be nervous. And when I married Jo, I’d never been more sure of anything in my life. Also, our wedding day was a mess and we had sex in a shed next to corpse and practically missed the entire thing,” Alex answered simply.

“Fair enough.”

“Just take a deep breath. You’ll be fine,” Jo placed a comforting hand on Izzie’s shoulder. “You two love each other and Decker adores Geo and Gabe.”

“Speak of the little devils,” Izzie chuckled as her sons barged into the bridal suite.

Geo had grown a lot in the past five years. At eleven years old, the boy was almost as tall as Izzie. His brown hair darkened a bit and started to curl slightly. He looked more and more grown up everyday.

Gabe had been adopted about four years ago at the age of three. Like Zola, Gabe had come to Grey Sloan for a surgical procedure as a toddler through the African exchange program that Alex had spearheaded. Gabe had needed surgery for a cardiac defect that Maggie had operated on. When Izzie heard that one of the little boys from the program was an orphan, she went to go meet him for herself and fell in love. The now seven year old was a boundless spring of energy that brought so much light and laughter into their lives.

“Mom!” The two boys gasped when they saw their mom standing in her dress. “You look so pretty!”

“She does, doesn’t she?” Jo smiled. “It’s almost time to start so you guys need to go find Decker and get ready, okay?”

The young boys gave their mom a hug and another compliment before making their way out the room. With a couple minutes left before the ceremony started, Izzie took another deep breath.

Meredith walked into the suite, “Okay. Our flower girls, Ellis, TJ, and Bella are ready. The ring bearers are with Decker and the groomsmen. The guests are all here. The priest is just waiting on you.”

“Let’s get you married,” Jo grinned excitedly and followed Meredith as she led the flower girls to the aisle.

Finally, it was just Izzie and Alex left, waiting outside the double doors for their turn to enter. Izzie bit her lip nervously, “Are you sure this isn’t weird? You walking me down the aisle? I mean you’ve seen me naked.”

“You know how many people I’ve seen naked?” Alex huffed a laugh. He extended his arm for Izzie to take. “No. It’s not weird. The past few years have been some of the best of my life. And not just because I married Jo and had three kids. Having you back has been great. You’ve become family. I’m so excited for you to get married and I feel honored that I get to be the one who walks you down the aisle. So, just shut up and start walking before I have to kick you down the aisle.”

And with that, Izzie realized that it had finally come full circle. Five years ago, she’d returned to Seattle with very little hope to cling to. Today, she had a family, a support system that was celebrating her as she finally got her happy ending. It might seem strange or unconventional to others, but she wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world.

The end.

——————————————————————————

Hi guys! I hope you enjoyed the final part of this series. I loved writing this story. I'll confess, Izzie Stevens has never been one of my favorite characters, but writing this redemption arc and beautiful ending for her character, while preserving jolex is something that I wish we would've seen in canon. Let me know what you thought of this and don't hesitate to follow me on Tumblr @iamtrebleclefstories for more content!

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adenei · 4 years ago

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Gryffindor Bonding Tales - The Follow Up

I couldn’t resist. Here’s what happens immediately after Hermione storms out of the truth or dare game! This WIP is closer to being Complete!

*************************************

Hermione made her way swiftly back to the Common Room. It wasn’t that she was embarrassed by kissing someone in front of her classmates. No, it was because she kissed her best friend who she’d been harboring feelings for, and had been too afraid to tell. It was just a dare, though. You don’t have to tell him anything unless you want to.

She’d taken the cowardly way out again, leaving the game before it was over, but she couldn’t bear to see his reaction. So she entered the common room and made her way halfway up the girls staircase before realizing that she’d left her books in the boy’s dorm because they were running late earlier.

********************

“Ginny! Ginny, wait up, will you!” Harry was calling down the corridor. It was hard to move quickly in clothes so tight without worrying he was going to tear something.

She finally paused long enough to turn around, “You should have stayed back!” she hissed at him.

“What? Why?” Harry was confused.

“I can’t explain it now, I need to go find Hermione!” Ginny said as she turned around and continued on her way.

“Okay, but can we at least change back first? No offense, but your clothes are kind of uncomfortable,” Harry said.

Ginny sent a smirk his way, “What? Don’t like women’s clothing?”

“Not on me, I don’t,” he muttered as she laughed.

They turned the corner to climb the last staircase to the common room, when they saw Professor McGonagall walking down the staircase towards them. “What on earth…?” she looked bewildered as she saw Harry and Ginny clearly wearing each other’s clothes.

Harry was trying to look anywhere but McGonagall, while Ginny embraced the scene. “Hi, Professor! Just an innocent dare for some Gryffindor fun!” They kept going before she could stop them and possibly take any points away for...indecency? Harry wasn’t really sure.

The Fat Lady gave them an amused look as they gave the password and entered the portrait hole, and much to Harry’s chagrin all eyes were on them when they entered the common room. It was still quite full considering it was barely eight o’clock.

“Uh, Harry,” Colin Creevey called, “I don’t think girl’s clothes really suit you, but Ginny could definitely pull off the boyish look!”

“Thanks, Colin,” Ginny waved him off, “I’d like to thank my six brothers who helped with this success.” Always the witty one, Harry thought, as she grabbed his hand and pulled him up the boy’s staircase.

Harry could hear Romilda Vane say, “..But I thought she already had a boyfriend!” in a clear tone of dismay.

**********************

Hermione was in the boy’s 6th year dorm retrieving her bag from Ron’s bed where she’d left it. Her hands were still shaking, which caused her to drop the bag, the contents spilling everywhere. Hermione groaned and knelt down to retrieve everything. When she was putting the last book in the bag, she heard voices on the staircase.

In a moment’s panic, she jumped onto Ron’s bed with the bag and quickly shut the curtains around it so she wouldn’t be seen. She’d just finished in time as Harry and Ginny stormed into the room.

“What is all the rush for? Am I missing something?” Harry asked as they entered.

“Yes! Of course you are! Now, quick, we’ll get back into our own clothes and then I can go find Hermione.” Ginny lifted Harry’s shirt over her head and tossed it to him. He froze and stared at her, she was only wearing a bra and thin vest. They’d changed in the stalls of the bathroom and threw their clothes over the wall before.

“What are you staring at? I’m still wearing more than I would in the Quidditch locker room, which you might want to get used to since I’m planning on making the team this year,” she said.

That snapped Harry out of it. “Oh, you are, are you?�� he said as he peeled her shirt off of himself and tossed it back in kind. “Sorry if it got stretched out a bit,” he said, putting his own shirt back on.

“It’s fine. Not like I’m a witch or anything to set it back to its original fit,” she said, taking off his trousers. It took a bit longer to switch the bottoms back because Harry had to peel her jeans off himself. They were so tight that he couldn’t remember how he even got them on in the first place.

Once they were decent and in their own clothes again, Harry said, “Now, what is going on?”

“Alright, alright! Remember when Hermione was fixated on the heart that Lavender put on Ron’s letter this summer?” Harry nodded. “Well, Lavender and Parvati had been planning this whole thing out, and they recruited Seamus and Dean to ask certain questions that would result in Lavender kissing Ron in the game because she fancies him.”

“She does?” Harry asked.

“Have you not noticed all her annoying giggling and girlishness when she’s around him? It’s revolting,” So, anyways, when I was on the train with Seamus and Dean, they were telling me about it. That’s why I asked to join the game. Once Lavender said yes, I worked with Seamus behind her back and convinced him to ask Hermione the question he was supposed to ask for Lavender.”

“So you’re the reason Hermione kissed Ron?” Harry was trying to make sense of it all.

“Try and keep up, will you? It wasn’t all me. Seamus didn’t like that Lavender was rigging the game, and he vividly remembered Hermione storming out in fourth year, so it was fairly simple to get him on board,” Ginny explained some more.

“Have you told Hermione yet?” Harry asked.

“No! I didn’t get a chance to before the game! That’s why I was trying to get to her.”

“But why’d you want me to stay?”

“Because I don’t know if Lavender was going to retaliate, and if Ron’s still down there, she may still find a way to kiss him, too!”

“Yeah, but he wouldn’t pick her over Hermione….”

“One would hope so,” Ginny said, rolling her eyes.

“..but he said he liked it when Neville asked.” Harry was going through all of the evidence against that happening.

“Yes, I know, but you don’t know how manipulative girls can be when they want something!” Ginny protested. “Now, let’s go down and you check the common room, and I’ll check her dorm.”

They bumped into Ron who was entering the dorm. Neither heard him approach. “Hey, have you guys seen Hermione?” Ginny and Harry both stopped dead in their tracks.

“Is the game over?” Harry asked.

“Dunno, but it was getting weird. Lavender was having a major meltdown, so Neville and I bowed out.” Ron looked over towards his bed and noticed his curtains were drawn. He hadn’t left them like that.

“Oh, er no we haven’t. I was just going to check the girls dorm,” Ginny explained.

“You didn’t do that first?” Ron asked her.

“No. Someone wanted to change clothes back first,” Ginny rolled her eyes. “Come on, Harry let’s go.” Ginny once again pulled him along as Ron walked over towards his bed, verbalizing what he’d thought moments before.

“Huh. I don’t remember these being closed when I left earlier.” Ron flicked his wand and the curtains were immediately pulled back.

“Shite,” said Hermione, covering her mouth at the uncharacteristically offensive word.

Ron laughed and sat down next to her. It was an awkward silence before Ron finally broke it. “So….you kissed me.”

Hermione made a small nodding motion with her head. A small smile played at her lips. “And you liked it?”

“You heard about Neville’s truth after you left then?” Ron cocked an eyebrow at her.

“Harry and Ginny weren’t as observant as you, so yes, I heard their whole conversation, including how Lavender tried to rig the game so she could kiss you.”

Ron stared at her. “Oh. Well, I’m glad that didn’t happen.”

“You are?” Hermione asked, trying not to get her hopes up.

“Well, yeah, the way it played out was way better,” he flashed his lopsided grin at her.

Hermione was feeling braver now, “So, does that mean you’d like it if I kissed you again?”

“That depends,” Ron said slowly.

“Oh?” Hermione’s breath hitched in her throat as he moved closer.

“Only if I didn’t do it first,” he said as he closed the gap between them. His lips met hers as she finally let herself feel him kissing her this time, and she was kissing him back.

When they pulled apart, neither could suppress the shy happiness on their faces. “So, does that mean we’re-” Hermione started to say.

Ron cut her off with a “Yes.”

Hermione leaned in again to kiss him because she could do that now. It wasn’t just in her dreams!

“As much as I like this, we should probably head downstairs before Ginny loses her mind,” Ron told her.

“Yes, I suppose you’re right.” Hermione said as Ron stood up. He held his hand out which she gladly took, and they made their way back to the common room.

#romione #hinny #gryffindor friendship #hp fanfic

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tirednotflirting · 5 years ago

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i’ve got a secret for the mad (in a little bit of time it won’t hurt so bad)

i was sad last night and this just happened. (baby’s first time writing lashton pls be nice)

Luke wakes up in an odd position, his long limbs tucked up onto the couch, an ache in his neck but also a pair of lips press against where the pain begins (something oddly poetic, he would reflect on later during a writing session that only he and Calum attended). Ashton's body is half on top of his own, the drummer’s calloused fingers pressing against his ribs under the t-shirt Luke had thrown on after showering in the venue the night before hopping on their bus.

The night before they had finished up their last Texas show which meant the long drive from Houston to Denver for the next show was on the agenda for the next couple of days. The show that night had felt a bit weird, Luke found himself thinking as he rummaged through the fridge in search of a few beers and a bottle of kombucha as he was the one who had been sent back to grab drinks for a movie night. Not that it hadn’t been a good show but at times he had found himself feeling some kind of tense energy during certain songs. Like a lack of fluidity he normally felt jamming with the guys for an arena of 10,000+ people.

He brushes it off pretty easily for now though, assuming it was maybe the lack of sleep or dehydration (the latter thought causing him to grab a bottle of water for himself as well) and shrugs to himself as he gently kicks the fridge door closed before wandering back to the lounge. Michael was standing in front of the TV, one hand on his hip while the other pointed a remote to the box, flipping through Netflix options. Calum stands just behind him, his chin resting against the blonde’s shoulder, softly adding comments about different titles he was finding he might be interested in.

Luke pulls a couple of the beers out from where they were cradled in his arms and passes one to each of them, the two boys turning and smiling their thanks as Luke continues walking past them toward the couch where Ashton was seated, his thumb swiping across his phone screen and his legs covered with a fleecy throw.

“Grabbed you a hippie juice,” Luke says quietly to him, trying not to startle him as he took a seat on the free end, his arm reaching over Ashton's shoulder to hand him the glass bottle of the pinky beverage. The comment would normally result in a giggle from the older boy along with some faux complaint at Luke making fun of his current drink of choice. Instead he is met with silence from Ashton, the mumblings of Calum and Michael trying to decide on what to watch and the hum of the interstate being the only sound to meet his ear.

Luke pouts as he let the bottle fall into Ashton's lap. As his eyes stay glued to the screen in front of him, his fingers now tapping against the glass, Luke was starting to have an idea of what might have felt off earlier in the night. He nudges his shoulder between Ashton's shoulder blades and let his head drop to his shoulder, the back of the couch keeping Luke from falling back as he looks up a bit at his cheek. Tired and somewhat sad hazel eyes met Luke’s blue as he felt Ashton sigh. “What is it, Luke?”

He immediately returns the question with another. “What’s bugging you?”

Ashton's tongue clicks against the roof of his mouth before his eyes lift to the ceiling and he takes a deep breath. Just as he’s about to respond, they both lift their eyes to the sound of footsteps toward the door that leads to the front of the bus as Mikey starts to speak. “Got a text that we’re stopping at McDonald's before we get too far out from anything. You guys want to join?”

Luke looks up to Ashton's face just as he’s looking down toward him with eyes pleading with him to not move. Luke lifts his head for a moment to respond for both of them. “Think we’re all good for now, you guys go ahead.”

The two of them shrug and wander toward the front, Luke watches them meander past the bunks as the lounge door slips shut again. He settles further into the plushy couch and Ashton scoots up some before letting his head drop into Luke's lap. He sighs gently again, this time against the knee closest to his face as he faces away from the pouting blonde. “Miss home. miss the sunflowers out back, miss that cat I started feeding out on the front porch.”

It was pretty routine for Ashton to hit some kind of slump around the halfway mark of a tour. Everyone was tired, everyone was missing the comforts of their own beds and kitchens. Being the first tour back after not being able to be out on the road for so long, Luke was honestly surprised it had taken this long for the boy in his lap to reach this point. He knew that by the end of it, Ashton had grown incredibly fond of his mornings watching the flowers he had been tending to dance in the breeze, of really taking his time to make his coffee in whatever fancy way he had read about trying recently.

Luke lets his fingers run through Ashton's black dyed curls (the longer style he had sported out of necessity summer 2020 was one he decided he wanted to keep for a while). The attention causes Ashton to turn some so he can look up into the eyes of the boy he’s cuddled himself onto. The action was one he had been hoping for, feeling and watching Luke wrap the dark hair around his painted fingers being one that brought him an almost odd sense of calm (a feeling he had found himself scribbling into song lyrics in his journals).

Just as Luke’s about to respond, to offer some kind of comforting something to try to make Ashton feel even a little better (he really hates to see him so upset and stuck in his head), he speaks up again. “Which like, I know is bullshit. Because I know I spent probably a collective three weeks on FaceTime and stuff whining about not being able to be out on the road with you guys and seeing the fans and stuff but—“

He stops as Luke reaches out his free hand to the one Ashton has resting against his chest. The younger boy tangles up their fingers and squeezes against his palm. “You don’t have to try to explain yourself to me. Come on, I get it.”

Luke rhythmically taps his fingers against the knuckles of the other boy, hoping to get him to focus on the pattern to relax him as he continues. “You think I don’t miss Petunia? Or spending nights out in the backyard around that fire pit we decided to finally build to jam around? Or watching you make breakfast in the morning after we all ended up falling asleep around my place after hanging too late?”

Ashton feels his cheek press into Luke’s thigh as he smiles, remembering the image of a sleepy, bleach-blonde Luke sitting on the counter beside the stove, a cup of coffee cradled between both hands, his eyes tired but happy as he watches Ashton flip pancakes and cut fruit. He’s pulled out of the summer-sun soaked memory when Luke keeps going. “But we’re lucky. Because we get to go out and make people really happy making music that we’re proud of when honestly, I was worried we would never get to do it again like this.”

And of course he’s right. Ashton knows that. He suddenly thinks of another memory from the end of the previous summer also in Luke's kitchen. It was after another night with everyone in his backyard. Michael and Calum had just left (Michael deciding to drive a giggly, clingy Calum back home with promises to make sure they were both on time to the writing session at Ashton’s in the morning) and Luke and Ashton were cleaning up when Ashton suddenly heard a sniffling from the opposite side of the kitchen island. Luke faced away from him toward the cabinets but upon turning him around with a gentle hand against his shoulder, Ashton was met with red, glossy eyes before Luke tucked his face into the somewhat shorter man’s neck, his arms wrapping around his waist. He spoke quietly of his fears of never getting back out on the road so as to avoid a full blown meltdown.

And while Ashton knew the wine Luke had sipped throughout the night was definitely heightening his emotions, he also knew the fears the boy in his arms confessed were ones shared by all four of them. Lacking the words to help dismiss those fears at the time, Ashton had just held Luke for a while in the kitchen, eventually waddling them both down the hall to the bedroom. He let the blonde cuddle into his side to fall asleep before sneaking out to finish cleaning up the kitchen and grabbing his keys to head home.

(Before returning back to the present moment, his mind sits for a minute on how the night actually ended - he had one foot out of the door when he heard a sniff from across the living room, Ashton turning to see Luke in the pajama pants and t-shirt he had managed to get him to change into, the curly boy’s lips pouted as he blinked over at him. Ashton sighed with a smile as he dropped his keys into the bowl by the door, clicking the lock back into place before toeing off his boots and following Luke back to the bedroom, agreeing to play as the big spoon until the morning.)

Ashton feels Luke poke at his cheek and he screws his eyes shut and shakes himself back to where he’s currently at, staring up at the sweet smile and golden curls just above him. “All of that to say,” Luke starts as he draws figure 8s through the black curls and Ashton finds himself leaning back into his hand. “You’re allowed to be home sick. Especially after being stuck at home for so long. It’s not often we’re allowed to get used to what it feels like. Being at home.”

The drummer turns then to face the ceiling again as he nods slowly, knowing there wasn’t much of a solution to his current feelings aside from just waiting for them to pass. It's then that Calum and Michael return to the back lounge on the bus, giggling as they find places to set the food on the far too tiny coffee table in between the two couches. Michael informs the two that had stayed behind that they got them fries and Luke smiles brightly as he thanks them. Calum is typing into the search bar the name of whatever comedy the two of them must have decided on while waiting for their food.

Luke is preparing to ask what they’ve settled on as he continues to listen to the two of them laugh while Calum types in each additional letter, when the weight in his lap is lifted. He watches wordlessly as Ashton gets up off the couch and plants himself on the opposite side of Luke, his legs then tossing over the blonde’s lap and his head moving to rest where Luke’s shoulder meets his neck. He wonders if Ashton can feel the warmth of the blush that he’s sure is now painting it’s way up the back of his neck and cheeks. He pulls his left arm out from where it's been squished into the couch cushion and moves to wrap it around Ashton's waist, an action that provides him the reward of the black haired boy nestling a bit closer toward his chest.

He finishes his question to Calum, who, upon turning to answer him, rolls his eyes as a smirk forms against his lips. He bites his tongue to avoid calling attention to the current arrangement his bandmates have placed themselves in since he was able to tell during the show that something was keeping Ashton stuck up in his head. Calum turns back to the TV and clicks play then and the title of a comedy from their childhood flashes onto the screen and Luke finds himself chuckling to himself just as the other two had before. Calum hits the light by the door and throws himself onto the other couch causing Michael to jokingly whine as the bassist lets his legs fall over his lap.

As Luke wiggles some to settle more into the couch, Ashton lifts his head in response, his eyes meeting Luke's with a questioning gaze. Luke rubs away the worry between the other boy’s brows that he can see from the white-blue illumination coming from the TV screen and squeezes Ashton’s hip so as to encourage him to settle back into his side. He misses hearing it over the dialogue from the characters on screen but feels a contented hum from Ashton as he cuddles into his neck. It's not fifteen minutes later that Luke catches soft snores in between the hushed laughter from the other couch.

He doesn’t remember ever stretching out and falling asleep on the couch. He's wondering how they managed the unconscious movement as he feels the lips against his neck pout some. Luke is still half asleep as he feels a smile stretch lazily across his face when he feels Ashton wrap his warm fingers more around his chest, obviously awake now but still chasing after the last moments of rest.

Luke's eyes lift from where he’s looking down at the boy against his chest to the door as he hears it slide open, Michael wandering in with a couple of Starbucks cups. “Hey cuddle bugs, time to get up,” he announces in a voice loud enough that both of them groan as he places the cups on the coffee table. “We need to be out at the car to go to those radio shows in an hour.”

He slips out then, giving a similar message to Calum who likely was up in his bunk. (Luke finds himself wondering when Michael suddenly became the morning person of the bunch.) Luke moves to sit up then, attempting to wrap an arm around Ashton so as to avoid letting him fall to the floor with the movement, but he is met with a frustrated noise and Ashton attempts to push his weight more onto him.

“Ash, we gotta—”

“No, five more minutes.”

Luke laughs gently and lets his back fall back against the cushion, deciding the attitude was somehow a good sign.

“Still feeling homesick?” he questions, his free hand moving to play with the ends of the black curls tickling his cheek.

“Not anymore,” Ashton mumbles back against his neck. The response is punctuated with him further cuddling into Luke's chest, somehow making the short answer feel like so much more than two little words.

Luke smiles and makes a mental note to run out between interviews to find where he can buy some sunflowers as he lets his eyes flutter shut once again.

#lashton #lashton fic #not even gonna try to tag this like crazy bc i just need to put it out into the world to say that i did #like do i need to apply for a membership card before i can post this #idk im just gonna do it #happy fluffy wednesday afternoon dudes

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fandomsconfuseme · 4 years ago

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I have been playing in my head with an idea for a fanfic (i actually never wrote fanfiction but oh well) and would love if any of you guys could tell me if you think i should try to write it!

Headcanon:

After It is defeated Richie is the one that goes to see Patty and explain everything and since every other loser is occupied doing something with their lives (Mike is traveling, Ben and Beverly are together and Bill goes back to his wife) they end up leaving Richie completely lost without realizing, so he becomes friends with Patty because they are both in a "what now?" moment in their lives. Patty finds out she is pregnant and Richie offers to be there to help.

Fast forward 9 months and Richie and Patty are trying to take care of this kid while having zero idea what they are doing. Bev is pregnant, Audrea is pregnant and Mike found a girl he really connected to in Florida, they got married and are now expecting twins. While Patty was pregnant Richie basically started going out and getting drunk in order to try to feel something beside numbness, having quick sex with any boy or girl that took his mind of his life. When the kid is born he stops drinking and straights up his life but by that time he got a model pregnant.

Fast forward 18 years and we have 6 adorable kids:

Anne Uris (18)

She grew up with Richie and Patty and basically became a mini Richie with better sense of style. She is the one that is always cracking jokes, is always ready to fight but can barely talk about her feelings. She plays a ton of instruments and dropped a lot of other ones, loves skating, is always wearing her dad shirts and t-shirts with some dark acessories, is confused about her sexuality but has supportive parents that tell her that at the end of the day she doesn't need labels and it doesn't matter and she is the first one to call people out on their bullshit (like Stan).

Samantha Tozier (17)

Richie got full custody of her when she was 4 because she is trans and her biological mother didn't "agree" with it so ended up becoming psychologically abusive. She is a ray of sunshine and is really similar to her mom (Patty). She is the nerd of the group, allways talking at the speed of light about some new subject she adores, she loves history (especially queer one), is totally a bookworm and an activist, loves studying cultures and learning new languages for fun (she is fluent in 5 but can understand a ton of other ones with a little bit of help). She also got Richie interest in sex (haha) and while she is in fact a virgin she is always reading smut and ends up being the one that teaches good sex education to the others and gives them shit about being safe and stds (like Eddie would). And while her sister is not the most touchy person ever her love language usually involves physical contact, they complete each other, are always doing stuff together and are also best friends.

Ruby Hanlon (17)

She is one of the popular kids, plays volley and really likes math and fashion. She sometimes gets involved with drama for the guys she chooses to get involved with (that are not always the best ones) but is a strong cookie and a feminist that would not turn on another girl for something a guy did. She is extravagant and loud and lovely to be around, she has friends from completely different circles and with completely different interests and its good at seeing people for who they truly are.

Theo Hanlon (17)

He is allways fighting with his sister and hates drama but is the first one to get involved to have her back. He is in the Track team and is always getting medals because he works hard and loves running. He is the person that is allways there if you need, loves hearing his friends rambling even if it's about something he knows Jack shit about and although he wouldn't admit it to his sister his family is one of the things he cares the most about. He is really popular with girls but has been in love with Samantha since they were little kids (she also loves him but they are just too dumb to realize each other feelings so everyone has to silently face palm themselves while they go on about how they won't say anything because they don't wanna ruin their friendship).

Adrian Hanscom (17)

Adrian is loud and vibrant, he is openly gay and having Bev as his mom means he can always have clothes that scream his personality, never apologizing for who he is. At first glance people might say that he just wants to have fun all the time and doesn't think about the future but he is actually the one that worries the most about which path he wants to take because he doesn't really know what he truly loves or wants to do with life. He likes to experiment and try new things and has a closer relationship with Ruby and they are two vibrant puzzle pieces that belong together.

George Denbrough (17)

He is the quiet kid, loves to dance and plans to do it professionally in the future. He is closer to Samantha and Anne but adores Adrian, and might have a little crush on him if you ask the others. He loves musicals and cats and has a laughter that is always louder than anyone in the room, he adores his younger sister (i didn't put her on the list because she is not exactly a main character but she is 5 or 6) but has a hard time connecting with his parents. He is the person that you would go to if you wanted to talk about your feelings without being judged and without them giving you advice in return.

Samantha has anxiety but is in therapy and talks openly and healthy about it. George is currently pretty much depressed but believes that since he doesn't think he is clinically depressed and he doesn't "have reason to be depressed" he shouldn't worry his parents about it. Ruby has a bad relationship with food that her friends are trying to help her with.

Ideally this would be a Fix it fic, the Tozier-Uris kids decide to research about Derry and their parents past because they wanna learn more about the people their parents love and end up finding things that Mike missed because of bad translations and lack of information available at the time. They decide to go back and try to save Eddie and Stan and the other kids get involved and go with them.

Another idea i played with in my head was Eddie having his sperm conserved as a way to try to delay Myra "requests" (more like manipulative behavior) to have kids, and Myra finding a way to use his sperm some years later because she is lonely (this would be HIGLY unethical but hear me out). And while researching about Eddie, Anne finds out about his kid and decides to find him because she believes he would be important if they are really using magic for this. She ends up finding a way to work as a babysitter for Myra but the kid doesn't really communicate a lot with other people and hates physical touch (i thought about making him autistic but i would have to learn more about the spectrum to portrait it accurately) and she is actually not that good with children. So one time when she tries to get close to him he basically has a meltdown and she calls Samantha who actually knows how to help and ends up getting close to the kid with time passing. From that point forward Samantha always goes with Anne and while Anne is researching about Derry, Pennywise and the Tuttle she is playing with the kid and starts building a strong relationship with him, teaching him what real family should feel like, not something overbearing and stressful but unconditional love, support and mutual understanding.

I don't know if i people would read this, specially since the main characters wouldn't be the Losers so please let me know your thoughts in the comments. Thank you :))

#reddie #it 2019 #it stephen king #It #richie tozier #richie trashmouth #Eddie kaspbrak #bill denbrough #stan uris #beverly marsh #ben hanson #mike hanlon #fix it fanfiction #Richiexeddie #I would really appreciate if you commented because i am super lost

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jeontaeh · 4 years ago

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SIX⁶

"Hey listen, let's just chill around the planet for tonight, keep our ship on freeze mode. Taehyung and Cherry are gonna keep an eye out for any problems. It'll be fine." Jin told Namjoon who hummed in response, and they heard a groan.

They were sitting around the dining area, because after the little meltdown of realising they were lost and alone in space floating through time and space and could inevitably die, they got hungry.

"For the last time- it's Jungkook, not Cherry." Jungkook snapped, and upon hearing the small silence, he smirked. "Or you guys could call me what girls usually call me- Daddy," Jungkook said, and then winked at Taehyung, who just grimaced.

"No shit," Hoseok laughed. "Could've sworn it'd be the other way around."

Jungkook frowned. "What?? Are you insinuating that- no way dude. I'm straight, why would I take it up the ass?"

Hoseok hummed. "Fair enough."

"Topping and bottoming is a social construct created by heterosexuals forcing heteronormative ideals upon homosexuals." Yoongi said, elbow rested on the table as he took a sip of his drink.

"Just say you're a bottom and go," Jimin said, and Yoongi scoffed.

"Excuse you. You're the biggest bottom in this damn ship." Yoongi retorted, and Jimin sighed. "True. But actually, no, I have a girlfriend."

Everyone laughed. Jimin frowned.

"Dude, she cheated on you like ten times. She's a bitch, just let her go." Taehyung said, and Jimin toyed with his food. "Yeah, whatever." Jimin mumbled, silence falling upon the table, Jimin clearly looking a little upset.

"Topping is fun." Hoseok said, leaning back into his chair.

"True." Jungkook and Taehyung said at the same time, and then looked at each other for a split second, and then back at Hoseok, who was now looking at Yoongi.

"I knew it," Yoongi laughed, and Hoseok smirked. "Yeah? How'd you know?" Hoseok said, putting his elbow on the table too, both their elbows touching a little.

"Dunno," Yoongi said, suddenly looking a little pink in the cheeks. "Got this- uh- v-vibe to you."

"A vibe?" Hoseok said softly to him, and Yoongi gulped, both quite close now.

"Min and Jung are flirting, I repeat, Min and Jung-"

"Shut up Jimin!!" Yoongi and Hoseok snapped, and Jimin started giggling, along with the other boys, who were giggling as well.

"Anyways- so- check this out. I? Have hypothermia. Hence, I can't sleep in the control room-"

"Jungkook you do not have hypothermia." Taehyung snapped, and Jungkook groaned, kicking his shin under the table, making him let out an ow.

"You're not getting out of sleeping together." Namjoon said, and then instantly covered his mouth with his hand because of what he said. Jungkook and Taehyung's eyes widened.

"Dude.. if you want some porn.. there's some on the tv.." Jungkook trailed, and Namjoon turned red. "Shut up, I didn't mean it like that-"

"Don't push your sexual fantasies on us, Captain. Jeez." Taehyung said, and Namjoon was red now, and both Jungkook and Taehyung started giggling when Namjoon rolled his eyes.

"I hate you guys." Namjoon grumbled, and Jungkook and Taehyung continued giggling, sipping their bubbly drinks in harmony.

"Guys I'll have to do a normal checkup tomorrow. It's one of my jobs as a medical student, to make sure you guys didn't catch anything by visiting the planet." Jin explained, and Namjoon turned to him.

"You can check me up anytime, Jin." Namjoon said, and then smirked when Jin turned red and hit his arm.

"Y'all so horny and shit. Anyways-" Jimin said, getting up and grabbing his plate. Before he could grab it, the plate just disappeared. It fucking just- it just vanished. Into thin fucking air.

Everyone was frozen, staring at the plate that just disappeared from Jimin's hands for 11 seconds- and then started screaming.

"What the fuck!!" Jungkook shouted, jumping off his seat, while Jimin screamed and ran behind Namjoon, and Jin did as well, and Taehyung ran up and hid behind Jungkook.

"The fucking plate just fucking disintegrated- what the fuck is this, the ending to Infinity War?!" Yoongi snapped, and Namjoon scoffed at him.

"Dude, you need to stop watching old ass movies." Namjoon said, and then Hoseok went up and touched his plate, and the plate just evaporated into thin air.

More screaming. "Ah-" Jungkook squeaked, trying to hide behind Taehyung, while Taehyung pushed him forward. "Dude- you have muscles!-"

"Yeah but I'm only 18 I can't die so soon-" Jungkook started, trying to hide behind Taehyung, and then Namjoon groaned.

"Guys! It's just a plate!"

"A plate that fucking ghosted itself like a girl that doesn't like you back!" Jimin snapped, and Taehyung snickered.

"Damn Jimin. You okay?"

"Going through some stuff right now." Jimin replied, and Taehyung nodded.

"Shut the fuck up!" Jin snapped, and then stepped forward and ran out the dining room. The others stood there, and then followed him out.

Jin was in the kitchen, checking the cabinet with the plates in it, and he sighed. "It's new tech. Plates are made of different matter than solid, so the particles evaporate after use and clean themselves." Jin explained, and all the guys sighed.

"Oh thank fuck. I thought we had some ghost plate shit going on. Turns out it's just nanotechnology." Jungkook laughed, and then Yoongi gulped.

"You guys know what this means right?" Yoongi said, and the guys frowned.

"What? That our plates left like my mom did when I was a kid?" Taehyung said, and everyone looked at him. Taehyung paused.

"Oh shit did I say that out loud? My bad- continue." Taehyung said, and everyone looked at him with concern for, like, ten seconds, and then continued.

"No- it means that we're all a bunch of scaredy little bitches who got scared of plates!" Yoongi snapped, and Jimin pouted.

"Hey! In my defence- utensils don't just poof into the air, okay?? They don't just leave like my girlfriend left me." Jimin said, and then he paused as well.

"Okay what the fuck is going on-" Jin said, and then Namjoon gulped, before saying- "We're all gonna die."

"We're not all- okay listen, there's like, a 53% chance we'll make it out alive. So chill." Hoseok said, and Taehyung nodded.

"Exactly. If there's one of us that could possibly die, we all know who that is." Taehyung said, and Jungkook nodded.

"Yes. Jimin-" Jungkook started, but got cut off.

"Jungkook." All six said at the same time, and Jungkook frowned.

"Woah, what? How am I the first likely to die?? Jimin's wearing a shirt with bra cupping on it!" Jungkook snapped, and Jimin looked down at his shirt, and then cupped his 'boobs'.

"Holy shit- it looks like I have boobs!" Jimin laughed, and then looked up in amazement. "Guys I have boobs!"

Jungkook suddenly looked around, and frowned. "Wait- all of you are wearing weird clothes," Jungkook pointed out. They all had mixes of pinks and purples and sparkles on their clothing.

"Yeah. You'd think a planet full of women would have some masculine clothing, but not really. Everything was rather feminine. To be honest, clothes don't have a gender, anyone can wear anything they want and gender is a social construct. But- the shop we went to had the cheapest stuff, and it had all these sparkles on it." Yoongi said, looking down at his xxxl shirt that said 'PUSSY POWER' on it.

"We got you clothes too, Jungkook. I don't know why you've been walking around in tiny ass panties." Taehyung said, and Jungkook scoffed. "These are boxers."

"He wants us to see his abs. We saw 'em, Jungkook. You can go change now." Jin said, and Jungkook blushed, and then frowned.

"I can't believe y'all hate thick people. Damn."

"What're you on about, no one hates me." Jimin said, and Jungkook glared at him, before turning around and walking to his room.

"Nice ass!" Taehyung yelled out, and Jungkook turned around and sneered at him, before entering his room, where a packet of clothes lay.

"It's late now, we've had a long ass day. Time isn't real." Namjoon said, and Yoongi was about to open his mouth, but Jin groaned. "God- don't say time is a social construct, I'm gonna hit my head against a wall."

"I was going to say that I'm tired, but you're right, time is a social construct." Yoongi said, and Jin went to a wall and hit his head against it.

"Damn. Okayyy- anyways. A bitch is gonna go get her beauty sleep! Night!" Jimin said, and then turned around and walked to his bedroom. He walked closer to it, and then stopped, and turned around.

"Where's the comment about my ass?" Jimin frowned, and Taehyung sighed. "Nice ass, Jimin." Taehyung said, and Jimin giggled and winked at the silver haired boy.

"Thanks. You too." Jimin said, before walking into his bedroom and closing the door.

"Tae, you change and go sleep in the control room. I'm really tired too." Namjoon said, and Jin nodded, a visible little bruise on his forehead. They both walked to their respected rooms and went in.

"Hey Yoongs, you wanna go for a quick walk around the ship?" Hoseok said, and Taehyung watched as Yoongi's eyes lit up a little, and he grinned. "Sure." Yoongi replied, and they both went off, whispering to each other.

Taehyung sighed and walked to his bedroom as well.

Jungkook was in his own bedroom, eyes angered, wearing his clothes that he's supposing is for him to wear to sleep. Jungkook walked out his room, slamming the door shut, and then walking towards Taehyung's room and opened it without knocking.

"What the fu-" Jungkook started, but then paused.

Taehyung was bent slightly, completely naked, rummaging through his bag of stuff on his bed, his ass facing Jungkook.

Jungkook gulped, and then decided to be funny. "Nice ass." Jungkook smirked, and then Taehyung turned around, eyes growing wide.

"Dude, what the fu-" Taehyung started, and then saw as Jungkook's eyes widened comically, mouth falling to the floor.

"W-what the fuck is that?!" Jungkook let out weakly, looking at the thing between Taehyung's legs.

Taehyung frowned, looking down at his dick, and then looked back up. "It's my dick, you fucking imbecile."

Jungkook gulped, and for some reason, stepped forward, closer to Taehyung, but still a distance between them. "I-is that real?" Jungkook let out, and Taehyung raised an eyebrow, feeling weird suddenly.

"What? Y-yeah- what the fuck are you doing?" Taehyung asked, seeing as Jungkook's eyes were glued on his dick, eyes wide.

"It-" Jungkook started, and then licked his dry lips, blushing. "I-it's so big." Jungkook let out, and then Taehyung let out a snicker, seeing as Jungkook looked at his gigantic penis for like two more seconds and then turned around.

"You fucking weirdo." Taehyung mumbled, grabbing a pair of sweatpants he bought and putting them on quickly. Jungkook was still red in the face, realising he'd started at Taehyung's...heat seeking moisture missile for a little too long.

"I- um- I came here t-to-"

"To make a comment about my ass and then stare at my dick for 27 seconds?"

Jungkook blushed. "No! I didn't mean to stare at your dick!"

"Oh so you meant to come see my ass?" Taehyung snickered, and Jungkook blushed again.

"Shut the fuck up Taehyung I- what the fuck is this shirt?" Jungkook snapped, turning around, seeing Taehyung finally dressed in tight sweatpants and a big pastel blue shirt.

Jungkook's tight pink t-shirt said 'Daddy's Little Girl' on it, and Taehyung giggled.

"What! It's funny- you're a kid so I got you a shirt from the kid's section. I don't understand, is it too small?" Taehyung tilted his head, and Jungkook glared at him.

"All my clothes are weird. I hate you. One says 'Proud Mother of 2' No I'm not!! How do those women even have babies??" Jungkook snapped, and Taehyung scoffed.

"Their biology is different, dude. Some women have organs that help in the 'male' parts of reproduction. What- you're just gonna assume every alien is like humans?" Taehyung said, and Jungkook scoffed in return.

"Clearly not since your dick is bigger than any normal human's." Jungkook snapped back, but then blushed when Taehyung laughed.

"Chill, Kook. It's not even that big. It's like, 22-"

"22 inches??!!?!?!?!?" Jungkook shouted, and Taehyung gave him a weirded out look.

"Are you dumb? No- centimetres." Taehyung said, and Jungkook sighed.

"Oh thank god, for a second I thought- wait, 9 inches?!?!?!?!" Jungkook shouted again, and Taehyung blushed. "Bro- shit up."

Jungkook blushed too, and then both got out of Taehyung's room and began walking towards the control room, soft hum of the engines avid to their ears in the silence.

"9 inches when it's hard or soft-"

"Jungkook."

"I-I'm just asking- do all Jupiter males have big penises?"

"Yes." Taehyung responded. "Mine's an average size in Jupiter." Taehyung mumbled, and they both entered the control room, and Jungkook hummed.

"I thought people were just being nice when they said I had a big dick- and that every dude I sleep with just happens to have a small penis." Taehyung explained, laughing down two thick blankets on the floor, along with two pillows.

"Yeah. Same same. My dick's huge too. I mean- not as big but. Pretty close. Y'know. Yup." Jungkook said, and Taehyung gave him an amused look, and they both lay down onto the thick blankets, head against pillows.

Small silence.

"Wait so you've never had a dick inside of you?" Jungkook asked, and Taehyung turned to face him.

"Are you horny? Or do you always just ask stupid ass questions?" Taehyung said, and Jungkook rolled to his side, looking at Taehyung.

"I'm always stupid. Now tell me," Jungkook said, poking his foot with his cold one, both wincing at how cold their feet were.

Taehyung sighed. "Yeah. Once or twice."

Jungkook's eyes glittered. "Is it fun?"

"Jesus fucking Christ-"

"Oh come on! Scientists say we're all inherently a little bisexual. And yeah, I know that was like super controversial, but it might be kinda true." Jungkook said.

Taehyung turned to his side, both facing each other now. "So you're saying you're bisexual?" Taehyung said softly, and Jungkook looked at him.

"I'm saying experimenting isn't all that bad." Jungkook replied. "Plus, fucking a dude is like doing anal with a girl, right? And I've done that coupe of fifty times, I'll be fine."

Taehyung snickered. "You're just assuming you'll be the top?

Jungkook frowned. "Well, duh."

Taehyung hummed. "I get it. Topping is hot. Hotter than bottoming. At least for me. S'fun- to see a guy squirm and all that shit. Hear them whine. And moan out your name- jesus fuck- I'm kinda horny too." Taehyung said, and then turned to face the ceiling of the ship.

Jungkook snickered, doing so as well, lying on his back. "So like, hypothetically speaking. Hypothetically. If we were to- y'know.." Jungkook trailed, and then turned a little to see Taehyung, and saw his cheeks turn a faint blue.

"We were to what?" Taehyung asked, and Jungkook gulped. "To- y'know- bring an al dente noodle to the spaghetti house." Jungkook said, and Taehyung choked.

"What?!" Taehyung let out, and they both started giggling, staring at the ceiling which had weird technology so was kind of see through, allowing both to see the stars. The lights were off now, only the planet and moons giving light from outside.

"To have sex, if we were to have sex. How'd we- y'know-"

"Why would you assume the two of us would have sex? There's five other guys on this ship, y'know." Taehyung said, and Jungkook hummed, inching a little closer to Taehyung, the older not noticing.

"Well- Namjoon's clearly into Jin. Jin's clearly into Namjoon. Hoseok and Yoongi have their own thing going on. And Jimin's in love with himself. So.. if you do the math.." Jungkook said, and Taehyung laughed.

"Shit, Cherry. I guess we would end up together." Taehyung said, and Jungkook giggled as well.

"So- when we have sex-"

"When??"

"If we have sex-" Jungkook reiterated, blushing. "If we were to have sex- who'd be Tom and who'd be Jerry?" Jungkook asked.

"Hey, if Jerry was full grown, he'd top the fuck out of Tom." Taehyung said, and Jungkook sighed.

"Fair enough. Okay okay- who'd be Shrek and who'd be Donkey?"

"Are you insinuating that Shrek fucked Donkey-"

Jungkook started laughing, so Taehyung continued. "Jeon Jungkook- he had a wife and three kids, and Donkey was in a happy marriage with a dragon-"

"I don't remember these stupid old stories- you come up with one." Jungkook said, and Taehyung hummed.

"Who'd be.. Woody and Who'd be Buzz Lightyear?"

"Buzz would fuck the shit out of Woody."

"Jungkook!!"

"Sorry!! Okay- just tell me. Who'd be the penetrator and who'd be the penetratee?" Jungkook asked, and Taehyung rolled to his side, and now the both were quite close, staring at one another.

Before Taehyung could speak, Jungkook did. "I could fuck you." Jungkook whispered, and Taehyung looked slightly amused- but the humour went away when Jungkook placed his hand on Taehyung's waist.

"Y'know- there's a reason why girls like me so much." Jungkook whispered again, and then leaned in, lips lingering over Taehyung's ear. "'Cause I fuck 'em really well. Like I could fuck you. Leave you whimpering and moaning my name, like you said." Jungkook said, and then saw how Taehyung's cheeks were slightly blue.

"It's a shame, really, if you ask me. Such a big dick-" Jungkook said, looking down at his sweats, and then back up. "Gone to waste." Jungkook whispered, and then saw how Taehyung gulped at that.

"Isn't that right?" Jungkook said, and then touched Taehyung's chin with his finger. "Baby boy?"

Taehyung paused for a while, and then let the blush wear off into a small snicker. "You're funny, Cherry. Really cute, too." Taehyung sighed, and Jungkook removed his hand from his waist, frowning.

"What?" Jungkook asked, and then saw Taehyung smirk. "I mean- you're too annoying to be a top, y'know?" Taehyung said, and Jungkook frowned.

"Meanie." Jungkook said, and Taehyung cooed, booping Jungkook's nose. "I'm just saying! You're trying too hard."

"M'not trying, Tae! I could fuck you really hard and make sure you don't walk for a year. Do you want me to? 'Cause I will," Jungkook growled, and then heard Taehyung let out a hum.

"I'm sure you could, Cherry. I'm not doubting that. I'm just saying- you just come across as a bratty bottom." Taehyung said, and then pinched Jungkook's waist, making him blush a little.

"Well you come across as a loud whiny bottom!" Jungkook snapped, and Taehyung giggled.

"You don't know me well enough." Taehyung whispered, and Jungkook sat up straight.

"I wanna know you well enough, then." Jungkook said, and Taehyung suddenly grabbed Jungkook down onto the bed, and turned him around, and then threw his arm over his waist.

"Here. I'll show you a thing or two." Taehyung whispered, and Jungkook frowned. "No! I'm not a little spoon, I-I have muscly arms! I'm gonna spoon you." Jungkook said, and tried turning around, but got caught in Taehyung's arms.

"I'm bigger than you. Now shut it, and let's just cuddle and never speak of it again. It's cold and we don't have blankets." Taehyung said, and wrapped his arms around Jungkook, holding him close.

Jungkook whined in his hold, hitting his chest lightly. "Let me go, alien boy." Jungkook said, and Taehyung tensed a little.

"Don't call me that." Taehyung said, voice coming out a little harsh.

Jungkook looked at him and gulped. "Oh- s-sorry- I didn't mean to-"

"I know. Just don't call me that." Taehyung said, and then Jungkook looked down. He turned around and Taehyung let go of his hold on him, a quiet surrounding them.

Jungkook grabbed Taehyung's arm and wrapped it around his waist. "Here. I'll be the little spoon for now. I feel bad." Jungkook squeaked, and Taehyung laughed airily, warmth tickling the back of Jungkook's neck.

"But you're still the baby boy." Jungkook affirmed.

"Sure thing, baby boy."

"No!" Jungkook said, and Taehyung squeezed Jungkook's waist. "You're so cute."

"No no- m'not cute!! I'm manly and strong! Ah- Taehyung. You won't tell anyone I was the little spoon, okay??" Jungkook said, and Taehyung placed his chin on Jungkook's shoulder.

"Okay." Taehyung whispered.

"Goodnight." Jungkook said.

"Goodnight, baby."

Jungkook found himself blushing, and squirmed a little in Taehyung's arms. "W-what?" Jungkook said softly, but Taehyung seemed to have fallen asleep.

Jungkook didn't know why his stomach felt like it was fluttering with butterflies, but he thought it best to ignore it. Just fear. S'just fear of being in a spaceship in the middle of nowhere. Nothing else.

✫ ✬ ✭ ✬ ✫

https://jeontaeh.tumblr.com/post/647226620930916352/seven%E2%81%B7

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trashfor-imagines · 5 years ago

Text

The Music Series: Haikyū!! Edition! | 6

A LITTLE MESSED UP ft. Bokuto x Reader

Summary: Short story: You’re the life of the party, but sometimes you accidentally on purpose get out of hand and surprisingly Bokuto’s always chooses to take care of you. Warnings: Alcohol. Smoking. Drunk behavior.

Music blared loudly through the bar. The band playing had a bit of a pop vibe to them that made everyone dance around. It was a Friday night which meant konpa. This was a tradition your friend group participated in on almost a weekly basis, barring exam time. It was different than a traditional konpa. Instead of an izakaya, the group, fluctuating anywhere between twenty to forty people, frequented the same seedy little bar in Shinjuku where the only five employees were friends of someone in the group. It was known for having live musicians, usually in the indie, DIY, punk genre and being frequented by mainly college students. Everyone loved listening to loud music to let off steam.

You had a particularly difficult week and had been looking forward to getting absolutely smashed. You’d gotten some scathing remarks on a review you’d written from your Classical Literature professor that was pretty crushing and your boss at the publishing company you worked at went in on you for not being more available - despite having explained twice already that you were an active college student. Then there was the fact your mother wouldn’t stop calling you just to chat and your next door neighbor was an old woman who lived alone and seemed to always need help with something and your big old heart just couldn’t say no to either woman. Honestly you were constantly running out of spoons and you wanted someone to take care of you.

Drinking game after drinking game, you played them all. Win or lose, as long as you were having a good time, you didn’t care. It was past midnight now and trains had long stopped running. You were dancing in circles with a group of girls you knew, arms in the air and bouncing rhythmically to the beat. Opening your eyes, you scanned the blurry sea of faces around you. You didn’t see him so you just keep dancing. It wasn’t until the band stopped playing and house music played, did you make your way over to the bar to order a beer.

Blowing the bartender - a boy you had classes with a few times - a kiss, you took the glass bottle with you as you meandered to the small enclosed back patio. It was deserted save for a person who was headed back in. You made a motion with your fingers to your lips and he passed you a cigarette before disappearing inside, the shutting of the door barely muffling the sounds of music and partiers. You stepped onto the bench carefully, sitting down on the back of it. The cigarette sat between your lips and you closed your eyes, feeling the cool night breeze that rushed through the city’s alleyways. Tonight was a great night. Tomorrow morning not so much. Your brows suddenly furrowed, realizing you didn’t have a lighter. A blast of music signaled that someone had just joined you.

Opening an eye, you couldn’t help the blush and lazy smile that appeared on your face upon seeing the man before you staring at you with a familiar and intense gaze. He was definitely drunk. Bokuto Kotarou was two types of drunk. First he was a charismatically loud and fun drunk, and if you got enough drinks in him, he would become serious and if he had his eyes on you, completely romantic and passionate.

Reaching up, he plucked the stick from your lips and placed it between his own. Slowly he reached into his pocket and pulled out a matchbook, fumbling slightly until he could light it. He stomped out the match, taking a single drag of the smoke before giving it back to you.

“It’s bad for you.”

“Then don’t enable me,” you replied, taking a drag.

“Like I could say no to you,” he scoffed, turning to sit down on the bench and carefully inserting himself between your legs. He pulled your legs over his strong shoulders and relaxed, gripping your thighs to keep you from accidentally falling backwards.

“Bokuto, take me home,” you whispered.

“In a little bit. It’s only two. Since it’s almost the end of their shift, the guys want to play a few more drinking games with the staff before we go.”

Finishing your beer and cigarette, you and Bokuto walked back inside and sat on the couches where the drinking crew sat. After several rounds of Pin-Pon-Pan, you were officially thrashed and could hardly keep up. Your owlish savior excused you for the night and the two started the long trek home across Tokyo to his apartment. He had switched beer out for water long ago, lying and saying it was vodka every time you asked him. You were quite the difficult to handle type of drunk, constantly side tracked and absolutely bratty, full of demands. Despite it having been two years since the two of you met, you hardly changed from when you first met.

A boy you knew from one class had brought Bokuto to the third ever konpa your freshman year of college. There was almost an immediate spark and the two of you were all over each other, even going to his apartment afterwards. The morning after, you didn’t stick around and disappeared. He came to the next konpa, the same thing happened, and the two of you agreed that as long as you were both into it and were single, this could keep happening. The rest was history after that, and that’s how Bokuto became your weekly dick appointment.

You still caused this man the same problems as always. Bokuto, however, matured in a sense. It depended on the situation really, but he was more serious about certain things, like his career. He decided he wasn’t going to finish college. Instead, he was going to try out for the Black Jackals after this semester. He remembered how after he told you his decision, you had acted quite recklessly at the following konpa, more so than usual. You had said some nasty things to him, kissed a stranger, and had been such a nightmare that friends asked why he even bothered with you. He simply smiled at them and, when you passed out in a booth, took you home and put you to bed. That’s what confirmed to him that you cared about him and this realization made him feel even more strongly about you.

“Bokuto, why don’t you fix your roots?” you asked, reaching up to touch his hair. At first he attempted to swat your hand away before finally lacing his fingers with yours, trying to keep you from falling behind.

“What’s wrong with my hair?”

“Let me fix it for you. It was so cute when it was growing out.” Your free hand joined your intertwined ones, gently grasping onto his wrist. Pressing your lips to his bicep, you peered up at him. He was so handsome and tall and-

Looking down he smiled at you. “I’ll think about it.”

You grinned and your gaze wandered past him to the store window and your eyes widened, a burst of energy escaping you as you pulled him over, wanting a better look at the dress in the window. “Look how cute it is. Do you think it’d suit me?”

He watched as your eyes sparkled and he couldn’t help smirking at you. “You look good with or without clothes. Doesn’t matter what you’re wearing.”

You narrowed your eyes and playfully slapped at his shoulder. “You dog.” Looking back at the dress, you sighed, “This store’s so expensive. Let’s go.”

The two of you continued on your way. It had barely been another fifteen minutes when Bokuto realized he was basically dragging you. He sighed, realizing you were getting exhausted. Peering back at you over his shoulder, he stopped walking, casting his gaze upward as if to ask God why. Your eyes were closed, head tilted back.

Opening one eye, you smiled at him. “Piggyback, please.”

“Come on, (Y/N), I’m tired too,” he pouted.

Stomping your feet you frowned at him, “I said please though!”

He sighed and squatted down enough for you to hop onto his back. “You’re lucky I love you.”

“No, you don’t,” you replied dismissively, climbing on.

Bokuto reached back and gave your ass and firm slap before standing up straight. “If I didn’t, then how do you explain why I always put up with your nonsense?”

“I hate you,” you pouted, resting your chin on his shoulder.

He sighed, "When are you going to finally admit you love me?”

“When you mean it,” you mumbled.

“Silly girl, don’t you know I mean it every time?”

By the time you made it to his apartment, you had sobered quite a bit. The two of you cuddled up on the couch in your underwear, making out and watching Japanese game shows between intimate physical moments and sweet whispers. You didn’t want to bring it up, but you’d been thinking of what he said when he was carrying you the entire time. Don’t you know I mean it every time? It was hard for you to digest.

He was a very honest guy, but you spent years digging in your heels when it came to having feelings for him and becoming anything other than friends-with-benefits. You remembered he hadn’t been mature or serious enough for you when you first met. He was that fun guy; the one you fooled around with, not married. You had been nursing a broken heart from a high school sweetheart at the time as well, deciding that you weren’t ready yet and you certainly weren’t going to date the first guy you slept with after your break up.

But you weren’t broken hearted about that boy anymore, and he wasn’t an immature goofball anymore. For the first time, during the span of knowing him, you opened your eyes that night and re-evaluated him; how he always seemed to be the one to take care of you, how whenever you freaked out on him he stayed by your side. Bokuto was always there for every meltdown and he was always the one you thought of when you needed someone to help you fix your problems. It’s why you can’t stand the idea of him leaving school for pro-volleyball. It feels like he's leaving you and... You never want to be without him.

Oh fuck.

Like clockwork, you woke up first with strong arms wrapped around you. Stretching out, you carefully slipped from his grasp. He slept like a log for the most part so it wasn’t difficult to make your morning after escape. You managed to shower, find the aspirin, and make a pot of coffee before you headed home. Setting some aspirin and a glass of water on his nightstand, you took a marker from his desk and wrote on his hand before pulling on your clothes as you walked out the door.

Several hours passed before Bokuto awoke. Groaning, he turned to his side and saw the empty space where you’d been and sighed. Just once he wished you’d actually stay long enough for him to wake up to you. As he reached up to rub his face, he paused at seeing the black marks on his hand. Fully opening his palm, he stared in disbelief.

I love you.

tag list: @hihiq

#bokuto kotaro #bokuto x reader #bokuto #kotaro #bokuto kotarou #fukurodani #haikyū!!#haikyuu!!#haikyu #volleyboys #fanfic #imagine #one shot #the music series #reader insert

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grimelords · 5 years ago

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Hello I finished my July playlist a week ago but when I went to post it tumblr was down, and then I just plumb forgot! Anyway, here it is - properly sequenced this time for a very special listening experience that seamlessly delivers you from disco heaven to black metal hell and everything in between. Also I’m thinking of making these playlists a tinyletter that people can subscribe to that comes out on an actual schedule, rather than me posting them at a random time weeks after they’re finished. Is that something you’d be interested in? Who knows. Check back next month! Anyway, here goes:

listen here

Stay Away From Me - The Sylvers: You know when you’re listening to a song and the sample is super hot but the rest is just ok, so you think to yourself well why don’t I just listen to the original instead? That’s what happened to me with Final Form by Sampa The Great. That song is good but it’s also kind of not doing enough to convince me not to just listen to this super hit by The Sylvers instead. A fun thing with this song is to try to count how many instruments you can hear because it is surprisingly densely arranged for some reason. There’s a xylophone back there going off if you listen.

Sizzlin’ Hot - Paradise: The same thing happened with this song and Sizzlin’ by Daphni. I think they were going for an Armand Van Helden style distillation of the pure essence of the song, sampling the hookiest part and speeding it up and thickening up all the percussion and all that, which can work amazingly but for me it just made me want to hear the original and so I have been all month. What’s so good about being alive now is that in most cases it’s just as easy to access music from 2019 as it is to access music from 1981 where an original copy is apparently going for $1000 on discogs. Every day I thank god for inventing mp3s and putting them on the ark.

Manaos (Canzone) - Fabio Frizzi and Crossbow: I forget how I came across this, I was going through random Fabio Frizzi soundtracks for some reason. I just love the concept of a disco song about escaping from vicious assailants. Funkily singing ‘God help us, if they catch us we all are gonna die.’ as spears fly past you.

Holding On - Julio Bashmore: I think this is one of my favourite pieces of sampling ever. The way the vocals in the background are cut they don’t even sound like vocals. They just a strange contextless textural sound that works so well before eventually revealing itself as vocals in the run before the drop. It’s just so good.

Weight Watchers - Parallel Dance Ensemble: First of all I love this disgusting bass sound. It sounds like two different indistinct bass lines playing at the same time and they both drowned. I’m also mounting a change.org petition to bring back this kind of extremely naff Tone Loc flow, it rocks.

Dance - ESG: I found this incredible band while I was looking for the rapper ESG and I’m so glad I did. Their song UFO is one of those songs that’s been sampled so many times you think of it as more of a sound effect than a song, like it comes preloaded on a drum machine everyone has or something, but it’s also a good template for ESG’s sound. Every ESG song I’ve heard so far goes like this: a straightforward beat that doesn’t change for the whole song, a functional bassline that doesn’t change for the whole song, and good old fashioned simple lyrics about dancing and having a good time that sound more like schoolyard clapping games than anything. It doesn’t sound like much but over the course of an album it adds up to this incredible sort of hypnotic post-punk funk that I cannot get enough of. It sounds like kids who have 1 idea making a whole album out of it because that’s exactly what it is and it’s great!

Crave You - Flight Facilities: I love how elementally simple this song is. The vocals are hypnotising enough so everything else just quietly supports it. The only part that stands out is the thick bass synth halfway through which makes the short sax solo at the and all the sweeter, a tiny little cherry on top.

You - Delta 5: Get a load of this band bio: “Initially inspired by the success of local heroes The Mekons and Gang Of Four, Leeds, England’s Delta 5 later emerged as one of the key figures of the feminist new wave. Formed in 1979 by vocalist/guitarist Julz Sale, fretless bassist Ros Allen and bassist Bethan Peters.” Just going to gloss over them having TWO bass players before they even have a drummer?? Absolutely amazing. I love this song because it’s such a specific, targeted fury. Imagine being the loser at your girlfriend’s gig when she launched into this one for the first time. ‘who’s got homebrew with lots of sediment?’ oh fuck that’s me ‘who took me to the Windham for a big night out?’ oh fuck that’s me ‘I found out about you’ oh FUCK

Siren - Gong Gong Gong: I love the way the bass works in this, just looping and layering different variations of this noisy, stationary riff on top of itself - steadfastly staying in the exact same place the whole song and growing in power the whole time as it sits in its stubbornness.

Changes - Antonio Williams and Kerry McCoy: This came up on my Discover Weekly and I completely fell in love with it, then I realised it’s Antwan and Kerry McCoy from Deafheaven which is extremely intriguing collaboration and fell in love even more. The vocals are so good. The pure broken-hearted anguish, and the super blunt delivery that progresses to straight up yelling by the end of it combined with the Radio Dept type instrumentation is just so powerful. This feels like it’s a song that could really be a life-changing piece of catharsis for everyone in a 5k radius done live.

Fuck A War - Geto Boys: Absolutely in love with the conceit of this song: rapping a whole song down the line to the army drafter. The incredible part being of course that Bushwick Bill would be able to dodge any draft easily, being as he was both a dwarf and blind in one eye.

God Make Me Funky - The Headhunters: I found a lot of great songs going through the samples list for We Can’t Be Stopped by Geto Boys and this is one of them. I have so much love for any song that takes its time like this: nearly two minutes to set the scene and somehow taking deadly seriously the very funny lyrical idea of desperately praying to god to PLEASE make you funky. The way this song escalates is also amazing, moving from a hot groove that sits in place to a full-on saxophone meltdown that feels like god placing his finger on your forehead and saying ‘so you want to be funky, do you?’ in a scary voice.

Use Me - Bill Withers: Fortunately and unfortunately, because of how this song was in Anchorman and because I’ve seen Anchorman one million times I can’t listen to it without hearing the noise Ron Burgundy makes when he sees Veronica in the first few seconds. Anyway, this song is so horny. The part where he has to explain to his bro how good this shit is? Doing all kinds of weird dom shit like ‘getting him in a crowd of high class people and then acting real rude to him?’ Weird. And the escalation into the claps at BABY! is amazing, he’s just going off powered by horniness and god bless him for it.

America! I’m For The Birds - Nicolas Jaar: Unbelievably, the deluxe edition of Sirens is possibly superior to the original. It’s a whole new tracklist, new songs interspersed throughout rather than the usual ‘three new songs at the end’ and it really gives it a whole new feel. This song is my favourite of the new ones and it’s a song I had in my head for a solid week. A perfect song to sing to yourself because the lyrics are so indistinct that you just end up mumbling pleasantly exactly like he is.

Cable Guy - Tierra Whack: I’m finally catching up on Tierra Whack and everyone’s right: she rocks. The sheer restraint in these songs is amazing, they just get in and out with only the good parts and no bullshit. It reminds me a lot of To The Innocent by Thingy which is one of my favourite albums for the same reason - the economy of the songwriting just serves to amplify the feeling of it. They both have this total irreverence in the lyricism where the songs are kind of about nothing but they’re so short and heartfelt that you dig for the feeling underneath it.

No Drug Like Me - Carly Rae Jepsen: I’ve previously written that what I love the most about the Carly Rae Jepsen is how horny it is and I’d like to double down on that sentiment here. I love how slow this song is, it’s the perfect tempo between danceable and ‘fucking’.

Con Calma (Remix) - Daddy Yankee, Katy Perry and Snow: I’ve been on a european holiday for most of this month and I would like to report that across Spain, Portugal, Czech Republic, France and Germany this is the absolute song of the summer. It is completely inescapable and personally I can’t get enough. Informer is one of the greatest and strangest one hit wonders of all time (it’s also canada’s highest selling reggae song of all time and Snow is thusly named because he’s white) and I’m psyched to hear it reworked by Daddy Yankee like this. Katy Perry being on the crossover attempt remix isn’t a good sign for her new album but she kills it so maybe that’s all that matters.

Chase The Devil - Max Romeo and The Upsetters: Here’s the other half of my short lived dub phase from the end of last month. This is a good example also of how completely beguiling lyrics can still be so effective. I have no idea what he means by putting on an iron shirt but it rhymes and he’s saying it with conviction so I’m nodding!

Glass - Bat For Lashes: The new Bat For Lashes songs have got me revisiting Two Suns which is an all time great five star album and this is my favourite song from it. Maybe the most powerful opening track of all time, it does as much worldbuilding as most fantasy novels do in 1000 pages. In fact almost every line in this is a viable fantasy novel title. A Thousand Crystal Towers. The Hand Of The Watchmen. A Knight In Crystal Armour. A Cape Of Rainbow. The way she sings ‘to be made of glass’ is.. incredible. I love Natasha Khan and I cannot wait to see what she does next.

Unsquare Dance - Paddy Milner: In searching spotify for other interpretations of Unsquare Dance after getting obsessed with it last month I came across this absolutely bonkers version. It’s maniacal, it feels like you would be physically and mentally drained by the end playing it because I am just listening to it. Need a little lie down.

Gimme Some Skin, My Friend - The Andrews Sisters: My girlfriend has turned me onto The Andrews Sisters lesser known hits recently and this is the best one: a song from when high fives were a novelty that those wacky blacks over in Harlem town were inventing. Extremely odd but an undeniable banger. The thing about The Andrews Sisters is one of them was an absolute force of nature as a performer and the other two were complete wet blankets and it’s kind of funny they were together as a group for their whole career because anyone with eyes can see where the real star is. The way she sings ‘baby’ at 1:25, and that whole run really, is absolutely amazing and so much better than this extremely dumb song deserves.

Kids On The Run - The Tallest Man On Earth: The piano sound alone in this is just so beautiful. This song could be about anything at all and it would still make me cry, and luckily for me: it basically is!

King Of Spain - The Tallest Man On Earth: Good song I had in my head the whole time I was in Spain. It’s incredible that his voice is so good. It feels like if it was even the tiniest bit different, slightly rougher or tinnier he would be completely hilariously unlistenable but instead he’s amazing. Plus the fact that he leans into it with the purposefully lo-fi trebly production is just so confident you can’t help but love it.

Romeo And Juliet - The Indigo Girls: A great cover I wasn’t aware of before that I heard in this great documentary Wildwood I was watching https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rOWxnh012J0. The way she absolutely flies off the handle and nearly tears the song down around her near the last chorus is pure power and I love people who can do that in an acoustic song without it feeling overblown, just getting totally swept up in it and taking everyone along with you.

On The Bus Mall - The Decemberists: Definitely the number one song about gay teenage prostitutes who love each other and are optimistic against the odds.

White Fire - Angel Olsen: This song feels like a piece of dark magic. It feels like a 4am moment of clarity, speaking everything true in a five minute monotone and then instantly falling back to sleep with only a dim memory in the morning.

Glass Eyes -JW Ridley: JW Ridley is a genius and I cannot wait to see what he does with an album. Every song he puts out seems to be better than his last. The central melody in this is just beautiful, and the whole thing has so much space in it it feels so much longer than 3 minutes. It’s like a song you can live in.

Nullarbor - Floodlights: I love how rough this song is, and driving across australia because you’ve got nothing else going on and want to rattle your own cage is a Huge mood.

Made Too Pretty (Audiotree Live Version) - As Cities Burn: I’m so glad As Cities Burn are back, because it means they get to do good shit like this Audiotree session where they absolutely killed it.

Dirty Hearts - Dallas Crane: I think I’ve put this on a playlist before for exactly the same reason: it’s a song I wake up with in my head fairly often for some reason and it’s a very fun slice of pub rock that doesn’t overstay it’s welcome.

Ruin This Smile - The Number 12 Looks Like You: Did you know The Number 12 Looks Like You have reformed after 10 years away and haven’t missed a step at all?? I’m salivating. This song is as good as anything they’ve put out before, and feels like it fits somewhere between Mongrel and Worse Than Alone which is fantastic news for me who always loved those a lot more than their earlier more explicitly grindcore stuff.

Nutrient Painting - Yellow Eyes: A special thanks to my friend and yours Powerburial for linking this song on his twitter. There’s something about the guitars in this song, in almost every riff, where it sounds like they’re playing backwards somehow. Like the structure of the melodies is backwards. It doesn’t make sense but that’s what it sounds like to me and it’s very disconcerting.

Jejune Stars - Bright Eyes: I think this an underrated Conor Oberst era, when he became a sort of buddhist for a while and wasn’t sad anymore but just observed earth from outer space instead. I also love the instrumentation of this song, Bright Eyes and blast beats a match made in heaven. Also the strange sample about pom’granite at the end is one of my favourite things ever. A very strange album to retire the Bright Eyes name on but a very good one too.

At The Bar - Dirty Three: When I was overseas I was thinking about cultural music, and Australia’s place in the world and things like that. I ended up thinking about Dirty Three who I think along with The Drones make the most distinctly Australian sounding music to me. Just the vastness they manage to conjure from such straightforward barebones instrumentation is incredible.

listen here

#Playlists

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msjr0119 · 5 years ago

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Cordonian Wags

Part 2b- I’m so sorry

In a world full of Professional footballers and their demanding wives- can their football team nicknamed the ‘Cordonian Apples’ succeed? An American female physiotherapist joins the club. Will this cause issues with the footballers wives?

*This series is based on The Royal Romance characters who belong to Pixelberry - AU Plot switch*

SECOND PART TO THE PREVIOUS PART- TUMBLR WOULDNT ALLOW ME TO POST IT AS ONE 😫😫😫 Read this Part first 😊

Tags: @annekebbphotography @burnsoslow @drakesensworld @ladyangel70 @kingliam2019 @bbrandy2002 @butindeed @bascmve01 @drakewalker04 @pedudley @captain-kingliamsqueen @duchessemersynwalker @insideamirage @of-course-i-went-to-hartfeld @kozabaji @texaskitten30 @ibldw-main @kimmiedoo5 @nikkis1983 @dangerouseggseagleartisan @gnatbrain @walker7519 @lodberg @cmestrella @hopefulmoonobject @addictedtodrakefanfic @angi15h @liamxs-world @rafasgirl23415 @notoriouscs @whenyourheartskipsabeat @jovialyouthmusic @nz1091 @yukinagato2012 @indiacater

******

“Get your things! You’re coming back to mine. You are staying with us. It’ll be fun - sleepovers, eating more chocolate than you have done tonight, I have wine lots of wine. You are not leaving. You don’t have to tell us who you kissed... that is your business. Between you two.”

“I have no say in the matter do I? You’re going to force me to go to yours aren’t you? Yes I need to forget about it. Please don’t mention it. He wants to talk but I can’t do that - it was a drunk mistake...”

Maxwell and hana just nodded politely, Maxwell went to pack Riley a bag whilst Hana tidied up for her. She was grateful to have such nice people around her for once in her life.

*****

Hey bro, Riley’s had a bit of a meltdown. But we are coming back now.

“Better tidy up a bit, they are coming back with Riley. Max has just text me, in his words she’s had ‘a meltdown’. Gentlemen be nice. It must be hard on her coming here.”

The trio arrived at Maxwell’s house, he had asked Hana to get them all a drink whilst he showed Riley the spare room in which she would be staying in. Riley felt like she was imposing and most likely playing gooseberry there was only the three of them staying there.

Riley quickly unpacked, and walked down the golden spiral staircase admiring Maxwell’s house. It was glamorous. Ambling into the room, she saw all the guests go quiet as she entered, then she saw him. No this is not happening- why is he here?

“So now we have the special guest here... why not play a drinking game? Never have I ever.” Maxwell said jumping up and down like an excited puppy. “I’ll start, so get comfy. Never have I ever fantasied over someone I shouldn’t have.”

Riley, Leo, Liam and Drake all took a shot. Riley daren’t look in the direction of who she kissed when she raised her glass to her lips- she didn’t fantasise over him but she couldn’t stop thinking about the kiss- his soft touch. Gulping the spirit down her she hoped that someone else would ask a question sooner rather than later. Leo began to blow kisses to her, she shuddered.

Savannah decided to ask the next question. “Never have I ever made out with a stranger.” Fuck Riley thought as she closed her eyes. As her eyes fluttered open she saw both the Rhys and Drake also have another shot.

“Never have I ever had a bedroom injury.”

“That’s hard to believe! Liam you have a turn.” Drake said nearly choking on his whiskey- shocked with Leo’s words.

“Never have I ever been cheated on.”

Riley took the shot along with only Drake. Feeling lightheaded she needed some coffee, or maybe just to get that intoxicated to block the pain away.

“Guys, I think the game is officially over. Leo has passed out. And myself and Drake are the only ones who have had a shot for every question. I’m out before I end up joining Leo on the floor!”

“Liam how’s your brother getting home? I’m not carrying him to a taxi... and I’m not explaining to the devil why he’s so drunk....”

“Why don’t you all just stay? I’ll take the blame if Madeleine, Olivia and Kiara question it....” Maxwell said with a cheesy grin- pleading with them all to stay.

“Bartie is in his room, Sav and Bertrand can stay there too. Hana can stay with me. Riley has her own room. Leo can stay on the floor- make sure he doesn’t piss himself again though and you two can share the sofa. There it’s sorted.”

Everyone agreed to stay, and said goodnight to each other. With the amount of alcohol they had consumed it was most likely going to be the second day in a row with a hangover. Maxwell had made them each a hangover bag- which contained a box of paracetamol, a bottle of water and some chewing gum. He really was the considerate one- even if he was to blame for their delicate heads they were going to have in the morning.

******

Riley collapsed on her bed after changing into her alluring lingerie- she really shouldn’t have trusted a man to pack her bag. He had no clue. She was hoping as soon as her head hit the pillow she would drift off to sleep- but no, her mind was working overtime. Thoughts due to her current situation in Cordonia and her past situation regarding her estranged husband. Maxwell kept texting her to check up on her- if she was able to fall asleep easily she would throttle him for constantly asking her. After the internal battle of trying to go sleep- her eyes were starting to feel heavy until there was a quiet knock on the door. Sighing, she stood up and answered the door.

“Max I’m fine. Well I’m not fine. You didn’t pack me any decent nightwear......”

“Wow!”

“Shit!” Grabbing her robe, she attempted to cover her body up- assuming it was Maxwell, she didn’t really care about him seeing her dressed like this. “What do you want?”

“Ive been telling you since last night that I wanted to talk. About you know what.”

“And like I have been saying since last night- it was nothing.” Riley feeling frustrated really didn’t want to talk whilst she was still drunk. “Can I come in? If anyone wakes up and sees us?”

“No. And if anyone sees you, I’m sure you could come up with another lame excuse.” There is no us - attempting to shut the door she failed as he forced the door to stay open with his foot.

“What did you want me to say? ‘Hey Bertrand, can you give me Riley’s number because I’ve just had the most amazing kiss with her.’ “

“No, but maybe you should have just not asked for it in the first place!”

He placed his finger over her lips to keep her quiet- she was getting more and more frustrated so was becoming more loud. Forcing himself into the room, he quietly stepped in and closed the door quietly.

“I’m not a home wrecker. I don’t want to be the reason for a relationship breakdown. You should have just left it be.”

Riley was nervously playing with her wedding ring- thinking back to how she felt when her husband constantly broke her heart. She didn’t ever want to be the other woman.

“You would never be just the other woman or the reason for my relationship breakdown. I like you. And I can’t show it in front of everyone. You are beautiful and I can’t lie and say that kiss didn’t mean anything.”

Moving closer to her, she bit her bottom lip- he put his hands on around her waist keeping a slight distance. Both their heartbeats were racing ten to the dozen. She wanted to push him away- she knew it was wrong, but there was a magnet pulling them closer together. Knowing the minute he touched her again her resistance would crumble. He brushed her hair away from her shoulder, moving his head closer to hers - his body now leaned against hers. Feeling his warmth- he crashed his lips onto hers, not a soft kiss like the prior night. Instead it was passionate and demanding. Picking her up he carried her over towards the bed- hovering over her, he knew what he wanted. He wanted her. Removing her robe, he began to kiss her body.

“We are both consenting adults- I want you Riley. That kiss last night made me want you more.” His eyes full of desire, deep down she was attracted to him and wanted this too. But she didn’t want to be that woman.

“I feel guilty. I can’t help it. I promised myself to never get involved with a footballer again.”

“Don’t feel guilty. I’m not like most footballers.”

Scrutinising his eyes for reassurance, caressing her cheeks and lowering closer to her- she felt his trousers tighten. He began teasing her by thrusting against her. This time she made the first move kissing him.

I’m so sorry... I’m now the other woman. The home wrecker. He’s Xavier. What are we doing?

#theroyalromance #choices trr #riley brooks #drakewalker #maxwell beaumont #liam rhys #leo rhys #hanalee #bertrand beaumont #savannah walker #au the royal romance

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