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lubdubsworld · 4 years ago

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The Devil’s Own.

Jungkook x OC

Mafia Au!

Warnings : Non-Con ! Manipulation, Degradation, Shitty hero with no redeeming Qualities you have been warned. ( i mean he does get better but not much.)

Summary : Just Mob Boss Jungkook doing mob boss things.

Chapter 1

“ Sign it. ”

I glared at him, feeling sick at the tone. The entitlement.

“No.” I said sharply and I could feel his anger swelling, morphing into something dangerous and deadly but I couldn’t care anymore. I was tired. Exhausted. This cat and mouse game had gone on , long enough. It wasn’t an even playing field, in any sense of the qword.

If today was the day I died, so be it. I would accept it. I would even welcome it.

I was done.

He had everything : an empire at his beck and call , enough money to pave the streets of Seoul in gold and an army of loyal associates behind him. His face was plastered on Billboards across the country , the President posted pictures of him on his fucking SNS and delegates from other countries had to wait weeks , just to get an appointment with the youngest billionaire South Korea had ever seen.

And yet none of those white collared dignitaries saw this side of him. The dirty, violent ruthless man who had more blood on his hands than anyone else in the country. My father’s. My brothers’.

Jeon Jungkook was both the most revered business man in the country and the undisputed king of Seoul’s criminal underbelly.

“You defiance only makes me want to break you in other ways Elena.” He said warningly and I felt my throat go dry. I stared at him, wondering how someone could look so expensively gorgeous and yet, like a hardened criminal.

The expensive silk shirt, the fitted slacks and the handmade shoes ought to clash with the dark ink that covered his entire arm and neck, the piercing on his eyebrow and the glint of metal on his tongue but it didn’t.

It just all came together to make him the most attractive man in existence.

I took a deep breath. Perhaps begging was the way to go?

“ You have my father’s company. You have my brother’s Hospital and you have the family mansion. It’s all yours. This bakery belongs to my mother. It’s all I have left of her. My sister in law is pregnant , due any day. She needs a place to stay and I don’t… I don’t have money to rent anywhere else.” I said desperately, thinking of the paltry wage I earned waiting tables. I could barely afford food for myself let alone for Jisoo and the baby on the way.

The bakery was abandoned but it had a roof. The furniture was crumbling but I could fix that. If I didn’t have to worry about rent, I could save up enough to make it livable. At least till I got a better job.

“I’ve offered you solutions for all of that.” He reminded me softly, eyes trained unblinkingly on me and I stared at him.

“I’m not going to be your whore.” I felt my voice shake.

He grimaced.

“You aren’t qualified to be my whore. And I don’t need one either. Whores are not my thing. I have a beautiful fiancée, don’t you remember? ” He grinned. I felt my heart ache because that fiancée was once my best friend. The only person I had trusted with my entire life. Lisa had betrayed my trust, had spied on my father’s operations and brought him down and I had the horrible, horrible inkling that she had also had something to do with my father and brother’s untimely death in a car crash.

But I couldn’t think about that. Every time I thought about her my heart broke and head spun, and I had to be at my maximum mental capacity if I was going to deal with her heartless fiancée.

“ If you ask me, you’re not fit for anything more than a back alley blowjob for a couple bucks. But Hoseok thinks you have potential. Join his agency, there are a lot of very wealthy men who have a bone to pick with your father. He made a shit ton of enemies. Most of them would love to fuck the defiance out of you. ”

His words felt like worms crawling all over my skin and I could feel the nausea churn inside me.

“I’m not signing the bakery over. You can call the creditors. I still have another year and half to pay the one remaining loan and they won’t come for me till then.” I felt my head begin to throb and Jungkook sighed.

“Suit yourself.” He stood up and I stayed still, watching his tall frame tower over me with ease. He gave me a small bitter smile. It was fraught with hatred and I stared back at him, knowing the emotion was probably mirrored in my gaze.

“Beautiful Elena. As pretty as the day you left me at the altar.” He smirked and I flushed.

“Your vengeance is petty and pointless and unfair…just like you.” I said angrily, frustration building u at his words. The way he talked about our broken engagement like it even mattered. It hadn’t even been real. We had hardly spoken and my father had called the wedding off at the last moment. But apparently, that had been the last straw for the Jeons. They had come after my father’s entire existence with a single minded intent to destroy him and they had succeeded. The man was dead . His two sons were dead.

But apparently it wasn’t enough.

Jungkook stared at me, slipping his hands into his pockets.

“Maybe. But it’s also deadly and potent. And it won’t rest until I see you reduced to nothing but a whore on the streets, spreading your legs for every man who can afford you.” He laughed. “ Saying no is a luxury , one that you’ll soon be unable to afford.”

I refused to be cowed, refused to give him the satisfaction of knowing that his words scared me. Because they did.

They scared me so damn much.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“This bed is so lumpy… I’m so sorry, unnie..” I said apologetically but Jisoo shook her head quickly, palms cupping my face as I held her elbows, gently lowering her to the bed. I stared at her feet, feeling my heart race at how swollen they looked. That can’t be normal, a voice whispered and

I didn’t know if that was normal and I had no money to take her to a clinic. The social center we usually went to only allowed three visits per month and we had used it all up. I wanted to throw caution to the wind and spend the thirty thousand won it would take but that would mean no groceries for a week and surely bread and eggs wouldn’t stretch that long, even if I could sneak meals in the restaurant for myself.

“I’ve been feeling a little dizzy…I’ll just sleep.” She said tiredly. She was thirty six weeks along, not due for another four weeks but her blood pressure was erratic. Her lab numbers were oscillating and there had been talks of an emergency c section. Even with insurance it was way more than I could afford but I had my own jewelry, a few expensive trinkets from my teenage years. I’d been obsessed with diamonds and my father had indulged me and I had a pair of earrings left. I’d already sold the rest but this would take care of the medical bills for the birth itself.

“My shift starts in ten minutes. I have to go. Give me a call if you need anything…” I said softly and I saw the familiar blank and listless look come into her eyes. I knew she was depressed, dealing with grief and pregnancy and loss but there was nothing I could do for her. Nothing. I had applied for a bunch of other jobs but they never wrote back. It wasn’t easy, being rejected over and over again but it wasn’t like there was much else I could do. And the truth was I was resigned to this, accepted that at some point I would have to take more loans and be stuck in an endless cycle of debt for the rest of my life.

And I had made peace with that.

There was no future for me. And I was okay with just surviving.

If only Jungkook would let me.

Apparently, watching me wipe down greasy tables and mop up floors and toilets trying to earn just enough to get a few square meals didn’t soothe his anger. It only fueled it. Jungkook couldn’t fathom that it had been six whole months of me on the streets of Seoul and I wasn’t completely destitute yet. I’d kept myself and my sister in law alive, safe and it pissed him off.

He wanted to see me broken and on my knees, begging him for help. The idea of me somehow surviving despite him taking everything away from me, it just didn’t sit well with him.

I couldn’t afford to have him as an enemy so all I could really hope was that one day he would wake up and give up. One day he would just wake up and decide that I wasn’t worth it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When I walked into my shift and noticed a familiar pair of high heeled Louboutins , completely out of place in my seedy place of employment, I knew I was in trouble. Lisa sat against one of the booths and her gaze was fixated on the door which meant she was waiting for someone. And when her eyes narrowed at the sight of me, I just knew I was the someone.

She wants to get me fired.

It wasn’t rocket science and I felt the urge to turn right back around and leave. But I tamped down on it. I could get through this. I would get through this. Lisa and Jungkook got off on invoking reactions and I wouldn’t give them that.

Except it wasn’t that easy.

It was a nightmare, watching her demand and reject and walk all over me but the sleeplessness from the past few days made spacing out easier and I just stared away at the wall as she yelled and complained and made a scene.

“You’ve stopped fighting? Finally giving up? Good…” She hissed when the manager apologized to her and told me to meet him after my shift and I felt myself tremble in indignation.

“I won’t fight you or Jungkook, you and I both know I can’t afford to.” I said quietly and she went still, something flashing in her eyes for a second. It was gone before I could fully process it but it had been there. Guilt.

Lisa wasn’t a terrible human. She had been a dear friend. We had grown up together and she had even hugged and teased me when I’d been betrothed to Jungkook, all those years ago. I had been twenty back then, naïve and spoiled. While Jungkook had taken my father’s entire legacy apart, piece by piece, Lisa had been nothing more than a pawn. I remembered all the times I had let her home, how she would disappear for lengths of time.

Planting bugs all over the house. All over his office. Jungkook had been smart. Someone like Lisa, so fascinated by thr wealth she had grown up around would naturally jump at the idea of more. It wasn’t greed. It was human nature. And with her help he had destroyed everything my father had built over decades.

I shuddered. My father hadn’t been a good man. He had been greedy, yes. But he hadn’t deserved to die. And Jungkook would have to pay for that sin, someday.

“There’s a job waiting for you in Hoseok’s club.” She smiled cruelly , “ you don’t need this one.”

“The fact that you want to take it away from me, tells me that maybe there’s nothing left in you save.” I said blankly and she turned her nose up at me.

“I have Jungkook. I don’t need to be saved.”

I shook my head. She was so naïve. Men like Jungkook cared for nothing but themselves. But I wondered if women like her didn’t care for anything but the money that came with being his. Money was precious, I thought bitterly. I’d never realized how privileged I had been until I’d had it all ripped away.

“He’s the one you need saving from. And one day you’ll realize that.” I shrugged, not in the mood to offer her anymore life advice. If she was alright with being a trophy wife in exchange for a few pretty shoes that was her prerogative.

Before she could reply, my phone rang.

“Hello?” I asked nervously and I felt my heart drop to my knees when I heard who it was.

I turned on my heel rushing inside and my manager gave me a look of surprise.

“ My sister..she’s… she’s sick. I need to go.” I said desperately and his eyes narrowed. It was the worst timing. He was already annoyed because of Lisa and I stared in disbelief as he quickly shook his head.

“No. I’m sorry Elena…I just can’t let you leave like that…” He said sharply.

It was so unfair.

“I haven’t taken a single day off in five months…” I said desperately..” Please, she’s pregnant..She needs me, she-“

“If you leave, you won’t have a job to come back to. I can’t do this.. First you make trouble with a customer and now you just want to walk out in the middle of your shift without any notice…”

“Fine. Fire me.” I snapped, because I’d just had enough of it. I was exhausted, and tomorrow I’d go knocking on some other tore and I’d get a job. I lived in Seoul …How hard could it be? For now, I had to get to Jisoo. I had to get the hospital and things would be okay.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It wasn’t okay.

“I… You want to keep her in? So soon?”

“Her blood pressure is through the roof. There are signs of severe pre eclampsia and we want to get her started on a magnesium drip. Steroids to help the baby’s lungs incase we need to deliver…”

“Deliver..?” I couldn’t breathe.

“Yes, I’m sorry…. If her blood pressure doesn’t come down we’re going to have to deliver.”

I nodded, glancing at the bed where Jisoo was sleeping, her face swollen and I knew that she was sick. Really sick. She looked pallid and ill.

“Is she going to be okay?” I asked hoarsely.

“We’re going to do what we can… But I’m going to be honest, we’re looking at a c section, a lot of meds and also some time in the NICU for the baby…. Can you afford it? Your sister’s insurance only covers 80% .”

I blinked, completely thrown. White noise rushed through my ears, a dull throb settling right at the base of my skull and beginning to spread all the way to my arms and back. It was panic mixed wth anxiety mixed with despair and I couldn’t quite cope. The earrings wouldn’t cover all that.

“Oh… Oh..yeah.” I said dully, “ Of course I can… Let me just…. Can I have a moment? There’s somethings I need to do.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I carefully slipped the cash into the envelope, swallowing as I sat on the pavement. I’d got another call from the hospital, they had administered the steroids but Jisoo’s condition seemed to be worsening. They wanted to try inducing labour soon but they wanted me to pay for the room and for the medicines, and apparently, the earrings weren’t as valuable as I thought they were.

I fought nausea wrapping arms around myself as I stared at the cars whizzing by, the putrid city air clogging my lungs as I tried to come to terms with what was happening. Jisoo needed help. She was the only one left and she carried my brother’s son. I felt my throat clog when I thought of Daehwan. He had been a good guy. I had loved him. It wasn’t fair, what Jungkook had done to my family, I thought miserably .

And the only reason I wasn’t driven by vengeance or anger was because I was nothing like Jungkook. I hated him. I didn’t want him to live in my head, didn’t want to waste any part of myself on him , not even my anger. But it was hard when he wouldn’t let me breathe, always at my heels like a wolf : jaws snapping and blood thirsty eyes trained on me at all times. I couldn’t fathom his obsession sometimes. Surely, his hatred was uncalled for now? He’d taken everything from me anyway.

There was a dull roaring in my ears, one that said that this was not really a surprise. I’d thought about it way too often, had considered it countless times. Had even spent one absolutely horrifying evening scouring the streets of Seoul’s red light district just to see how sex workers behaved.

I’d also realized that in the face of desperation, dignity didn’t hold much value.

You are going to pay your debts on your back and on your knees.

The first time Jungkook had thrown it at my face, eyes glinting with glee, my stomach had rebelled so hard. I’d been absolutely infuriated, had thrown a vase at him. And it had been awful, watching him catch it out of the air with ease, his mocking laughter making my bones rattle as he shook his head, “ That’s how this ends, Elena. Mark my words.”

And it was pitiful , that he went through life so consumed with hatred and vindictive cruelty that he couldn’t leave me alone . He was pathetic. That’s how I saw him. A pathetic child who refused to stop tormenting the helpless ant on the floor although it was no match for his cruelty.

At some point Jungkook was going to win. And his idea of winning was seeing me stripped bare of the one thing that kept me alive : my freedom.

It had just happened sooner than I’d thought.

Because I knew what it would mean, to go to Hoseok. He would own me. Hoseok’s whores were all slaves, tangled in his web so badly that there was no hope of escape. He wasn’t cruel but he was smart. No one left the his ‘ agency’ once they went in. I would be lost, forever. And I couldn’t stomach it.

I stared at my knees, fists clenched on the fabric of my skirt. I grabbed my phone, scrolling through the contacts. I considered it carefully. I had to do this on my terms. Had to make sure I retained some sort of control here.

And I knew just how to do it.

Hoseok picked up on the third ring.

“Hello.”

“I need help.” I croaked out.

The deep chuckle made my skin crawl.

“Elena Gong. What a wonderful, wonderful surprise. What can I do you for?” He drawled.

“Well sweetheart, I’m all out of charity so you’re going to have to make it worth my while.”

I took a deep breath.

“I’m a virgin.” I whispered.

The line went completely silent.

“What?” The amusement in his voice died.

“You heard me and I’ll let you cash in on it. I’ll let you auction it off…” I tamped down on the burning protest in my lung, the screaming inside my head that said it was horrifying, that I was considering this. “ But only if you keep my terms.”

“What makes you think you have a say in that.” He said sharply and I laughed.

“I belong to your world, Hoseok. Did you forget that we were friends, once.” I whispered and he didn’t reply.

Laughter, kindness, a big brother I could always count on, hobi oppa, nine year old me with my fingers curled around his wrist as we ran all around the gardens , a smile so wide that he could spread sunshine on the gloomiest days. Different from Jungkook and Namjoon and Yoongi and the others. Willing to include a ‘ girl’ in his playtime. Lisa and I the only girls, not even fazed watching as the rest of them wielded toy guns and mock interrogation scenes, pretending to kill and maim and torture because that was the world we were born into.

“We’re not friends, Elena. Let’s get that straight. The only part of you that holds any value to me is th part between your legs. So tell me, what do you want.”

“When was the last time you auctioned off someone’s virginity? You know how much money you can make off something like that. Not just from the sale itself but from the entire night. Your club… Your gaming hell…. All of it.”

“You expect me to believe you’re a virgin. At twenty seven.” He scoffed.

“Put the word out, everywhere. If you find one man who says he’s slept with me , I’ll back off.”

“That would require me to tarnish your family name. And you’re alright with that?”

I smiled biotterly.

“Isn’t that what you and your precious Jungkookie want? To see the last living Gong, be labeled as a whore and a slut.”

He didn’t reply.

“I’ll give you that. You can do it… You know that will only interest more people. As Jungkook so eloquently put it, most of them would love to fuck the defiance out of me.”

“What’s the catch. What do you want. ”

“2 billion won.” I said firmly “It will be one night. One night only and I want enough money to pay off every one of my father’s debts, to get me an apartment for my sister in law and to support her and her baby for a year at least.”

“Done.” He said without missing a beat and I went still. What must it be like, to throw around money like that without a care in the world. And it sickened me that Jungkook was probably ten times as rich as Hoseok , the money my father owed him and his associates not even pocket change in comparison to his gargantuan wealth and yet, he stayed on my heels, snapping his jaws like a dog with a bone.

“And Jungkook doesn’t get to watch.” I said softly, knowing exactly what Jungkook would get off on.

That made Hoseok laugh.

“You know him too well. I keep forgetting he was madly in love with you once.”

I resisted the urge to vomit. Jungkook didn’t know love. He knew ownership. He didn’t love me, he thought he owned me. That I was his to play with…. For the rest of his life. And when my father had denied him that, just like a toddler in a toy store being denied a shiny toy to break and trample on, he had thrown a temper tantrum.

Except his tantrums always ended in death and destruction.

“That’s the deal. He doesn’t turn up there to gloat.”

“He’s heading out to Switzerland for a week , two days from now.” Hoseok said evenly.

“Good then. My sister in law…she “ I swallowed. “ She’s in a hospital in Yongsan. I’ll send you the address.”

“I’ll take care of it. But I want you here tonight. I’m not going to drop a couple billion won on your head without making sure I’m getting my money’s worth. And I can’t have you changing your mind and bolting either. My reputation is on the line here. If I put out the word that I’m serving something so fucking delicious and then back out, they’re not going to want to buy Hobi’s wares anymore. You understand what I’m saying darling?” Hoseok drawled and I knew exactly what he was saying. If I agreed to this, it was blanket consent for him to whatever he wanted.

“I won’t back out. I can’t. But this is one night. One night with whichever bastard you choose and that’s it. I want out. I don’t want you or Jungkook hounding me again. Ever.” My voice shook as I dug my fingers into my knees.

“My men will be there in ten minutes. Sit tight, princess.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I stared at Hoseok as he carefully poured me a finger of whiskey, neat. He gave me a smirk and I shrugged.

“you remember.” I said casually, throat itching because it had been way too long since I’d had quality alcohol. I missed the burn, the warmth , the numbness that followed.

“Of course I do. You could drink all of us under the table with little effort. It was spectacular.” He laughed and I leaned back against the couch, letting my head fall back.

“I was half certain that you would have a doctor around to make sure I’m a virgin.” I stared at him and he shrugged. “ Pointless. You’re twenty seven, you’ve probably had stuff up there anyway… Not like your hymen’s still going to be intact.”

I thought it was rather horrifying, that I didn’t feel nearly as mortified as I should. This was how Hoseok talked, matter of fact and open and that was why he was so popular. Anytime an important person came into the country, Hobi was the one who offered entertainment for the night. Hobi’s girls were always the prettiest, most well behaved and perfect. They were educated, knew what they were talking about and he didn’t force them into the life. They loved it, enjoyed it and it showed.

Not to say he was a saint.

Far from it.

Hoseok knew how to dine with kings in castles but also how to wrestle with swine in the gutter. The seedy brothels in Seoul’s back alleys were his as well, and he ruled his kingdom with an iron hand. The prostitutes there feared him, one look or word enough to silence any rebellion, any thought of escape.

He was called Hope. And yet somehow that was exactly what he denied the women under him. There was no hope here. There was only lust and power and money. You came to Hobi…. You never left .

I took the glass he offered, taking a small sip, savoring the taste.

“But you believe me. I wonder why.” I watched him closely and he scoffed.

“Between your father and Jungkook, no one ever really had the pluck to come anywhere near you did they?”

Undisputable.

I sighed, leaning back to stare at him.

“Do you think dying hurts?” I asked softly.

It was frightening, how his entire body went stiff, eyes wide and jaw dropping.

“Elena, what the fuck-“

“Its just a question. You’ve killed people. You’ve watched them die… how do you think they feel?” I asked , curious.

“None of them wanted to die. If that’s what you’re asking.” The look in his eyes made me nervous.

I stared at him and the question was obvious. None of them wanted to die, but do you?

I didn’t.

“I’m not thinking of killing myself , oppa. Stop looking so horrified.” I laughed. He shook his head.

“ Don’t joke about that. It’s not fucking funny.”

I sobered up, remembering with a jolt. Ah, of course.

“I’m sorry. I forgot.” I said quietly.

Hoseok’s little sister had killed herself when I was seventeen. She was a year older than me and her father had lost her in a wager to a seventy year old man, known for torturing his bedmates. She had heard the news, taken a deep breath and taken a deep dive off the seventeeth floor of the condo where she lived with her mother.

I’d been engaged to Jungkook by then. And I had almost wanted it. Jungkook wasn’t old at least… twenty one to my seventeen.

“Just so you know, he’s going to find out. And he’s not going to like it.”

I shrugged. Three years is a long time to be preyed upon and now my mind was resigned to a life of being hunted. Hoseok was right. Jungkook would find out and he wouldn’t like it.

Good.

“I don’t care what he does anymore. All I care is that Jisoo and the baby are left out of whatever plans he has…. If you promise me you’ll keep them safe , I’ll cooperate.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was a baby boy.

I stared, fingers itching to hold the baby but it was impossible, the little one whisked away to the NICU right after with respiratory distress and Jisoo had gone into a seizure, eyes rolling back into her eyes.

She as alright now, resting in a VIP room with the best care money could buy. Hoseok had asked me if I was happy with the arrangements, and if I would name the boy after him.

I stared at the room, large and breezy and filled with flowers and gifts, toys and baby stuff and I knew right then that I had sealed my fate. I was going to have to go through with this. I could imagine how much Jisoo would protest when she came to her senses. The only relief was that it would take her a few days to be good enough to fight or protest. But then this would all be over and done with.

Jungkook would leave this afternoon. His flight was at three.

I would reach the club at five. The patrons would arrive at seven.

One night, I reminded myself , staring at the gentle rise and fall of Jisoo’s chest as she slept, my fingers playing with the soft skin on her wrist. The IV line went through her veins and I watched the gentle drip of it.

One night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I didn’t know how auctions happened and while I’d been prepared for the worst kind of humiliation, Hoseok assured me that he wasn’t going to make me stand naked on some podium or something.

“Generally, I would do something like that simply for the flair of it but consider this a favor ….a respite because you were, as you said, once a friend.” He gave me an even smile and I could only nod in mute relief.

I was grateful. Beyond grateful.

And what was more, he hadn’t told anyone, who I was.

That stunned me. Because wasn’t that the selling point? The murderous, greedy mob rat Gong Hyo Suk’s only daughter forced to spread her legs for one lucky stranger? If Hoseok had cashed in on that he would have made a fortune. But he hadn’t. I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing. Would , whoever it was be upset if he recognized me?

I was led to a bedroom, large and tastefully decorated with silky satin sheets and dark curtains and dim lighting that lit up parts of the room and left other parts plunged in darkness. Hoseok had told me to wear whatever I wanted and I realized with a pang that he really didn’t see this as some sort of transaction. He was trying to make it as easy as possible without making any decisions for me. Offering me choices and options and some illusion of being in control.

I didn’t have anything fancy so it was just a dress shirt that I borrowed from Hoseok. I’d left the underwear off, eager to merely get the whole thing over with. I felt a sudden overwhelming urge to laugh out loud.

If Jungkook were here he really would have lost his damn mind, simply because of how little this whole thing affected me. And that was it, really. He was always desperate for a reaction.

Earlier when this whole thing had started, I’d obliged him with that. I would scream, rant and yell….launch myself at him like a wildcat, scratching at him , fists flying and it was obscene, how much he seemed to enjoy that. He would press me up against walls and tables , fingers choking the breath out of my lung, just so he could see me struggle and push back.

He fed off from every negative reaction I offered him and it had taken me a long long time that the way to beat him was to become passive, unresponsive. I would go limp in his arms, stare at him blankly as he tried to manhandle me and that…that had pissed him off. Because that meant I wasn’t playing his game anymore.

If the prey wasn’t playing, the game wasn’t fun anymore. It was drab.

Boring.

And I knew that Jungkook kept raising the stakes, kept tightening the noose around my neck….just to bring that girl out again. The one that had wanted to put up a fight . The one that wanted to mouth off even with the muzzle of a gun pressed against her head. The one who would spit in his face in front of all his associates, even if it earned her a vicious strike of his hand across her face.

I shuddered. They weren’t memories I liked reliving.

Well, if that was who he wanted, I’d make sure he would never see her again.

The door opening made me jump and Hoseok came in , with a wide grin on his face.

“Baby…. Your guest for the night.” He said softly and I peered over his shoulders, my heart and mind grinding to a halt when I caught sight of what had to be the most breathtakingly beautiful man on the face of the planet.

I felt my heart begin to pound, fear taking over because this wasn’t okay. Not really. I was okay with old, creepy and disgusting , not able to get it up for more than ten minutes.

I wasn’t okay with someone who looked like they stepped right out of the latest issue of GQ.

Hoseok left quickly, closing the door behind him and the man stepped into the light, the brightness lighting up his perfect features even more. I felt my throat go dry, and fought the urge to get up and run. Growing up as the daughter of a mobster , I’d learned how to trust my instincts over appearances.

And right now, every single one of those instincts screamed at me that this man was absolutely dangerous.

“Well, you are beautiful. I’ll give you that. “ He said casually.

“Thank you.” I said stiltedly, watching as he tugged on his tie, pulling it off his neck deftly . Instead of tossing it aside , he wrapped it a bunch of times around his wrist over and over as he smiled at me.

“Don’t thank me yet. The only reason I like beautiful things is because of how easily they break.” He smiled. “ I haven’t been with a virgin in a while…. I miss the screams.”

And there it was the full blown panic that came with stark terror. I crawled back on the bed, staring as he moved closer and there was no mistaking the look on his face, the harsh grip of his hand on my ankle telling me that I was going to regret every one of the choices that led me here.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Hoseok wasn’t at the airport.” Jungkook observed casually, glancing at Yoongi as the latter finished cleaning his gun carefully, eyes fixed on his weapon with utmost concentration.

“He’s holding some sort of auction tonight. Some chick …” Yoongi said casually and Jungkook hummed. It was not the kind of thing he was interested in. Anonymous bids were often boring : actresses or female idols past their prime, desperate to make some money to survive. He had no interest in those but he was a little peeved that Hoseok hadn’t told him anything about it.

Hoseok was one of Jungkook’s most trusted friends. He was almost as powerfully rich as Jungkook and the only reason Jungkook reigned supreme was because Hoseok had no interest in challenging him for the throne. Hoseok was dangerous and cunning and loyal and Jungkook was grateful to have him on his side and he had hoped to see him before leaving. Just to ask him to keep an eye on Elena.

He grimaced, hating himself.

God, he couldn’t go two hours without thinking of her. It fucked with his head, the amount of space she took up inside him. Jungkook , for all his wealth and power, was driven solely by his need to prove himself. He wanted to be powerful and terrifying yes, but more than that , he wanted people to know.

He wanted people to look him in the eye and acknowledge him for what he was : the most dangerous man in the country. He liked seeing that fear, that worship, that admiration. He got off on it. He wanted it , craved it and for some reason he craved it more from her , than anyone else.

And instead of giving him what he wanted, instead of begging on her knees for mercy, instead of licking his shoes and begging for him to let her live….she ignored him. She looked at him with defiance and pride, her chin straight and her back unbending, her gaze locked right on him like she was his fucking equal….

And Jungkook, he’d taken a lot of insults. Taken more than his fair share of hits in life …..

But when she looked at him like that , like he was something stuck to the bottom of her shoe….

Fuck it drove him wild with fury.

It made him want to teach her a fucking lesson, to remind her that he owned her because he owned everything. To break her down, snuff out the flames of defiance that burned so bright in those ember eyes… Take her into his bed and brand her with his body. Till she was on the floor, on her knees covered in his spit and cum begging for mercy….

Because no one looked at Jeon Jungkook like that and lived to tell the tale..

“Seokjin’s here. Landed in Korea a couple of hours ago. ” Yoongi said casually and Jungkook smiled a bit at that. He loved his older brother, technically a step brother and growing up he had only saw him when he visited his mother in China. That meant a couple of months a year and now as adults, a bit more often because Seokjin loved Jungkook and liked to visit him often.

Seokjin was a celebrity trainer, working with actors and athletes and he did a good amount of modeling as well. He was rich, handsome and well liked and the only thing that gave away the Jeon blood in him was the fact that he was a sexual sadist.

The face of an angel with a devilish streak, he had a penchant for sadism and inflicting pain on his partners and while Jungkook didn’t particularly enjoy indulging him, he knew there were women who were into that and usually had them arranged for when Seokjin dropped by in Korea. His hyung’s visit seldom lasted more than a few weeks at a time and it was a pity that he would miss out one whole week of it .

But the issue in Switzerland was a little pressing and Jungkook had to be there in person to sort it out.

He leaned back against the seat, staring out of the window, sighing.

“An unsullied dove ….What the fuck is this shit..” Yoongi muttered and Jungkook turned, curious.

“What?”

“Hoseok’s been hyping up some new girl for the auction and Seokjin hyung’s bidding on her.”

Jungkook laughed at that.

“Jungkook…..” Yoongi’s voice is completely stunned, his eyes confused as he looks up at Jungkook.” Its Elena.”

Jungkook’s thought process came to a grinding halt.

There’s a sound between his ears, a dull rushing sound like the wind in a storm and he can’t quite comprehend what he just heard. Even Namjoon who had been buried in his laptop , looked up then, tugging an airpod out of his ear.

“Wait…did you say Elena?” His eyes were wide , lips parted in shock. Yoongi and Namjoon exchanged glances, no doubt bracing themselves for the explosion that was to follow.

Jungkook took a deep breath.

“Turn the fucking plane around.”

That jolted Namjoon out of his stunned stupor..

“Turn-? Jungkook what…. We’re on a fourteen hour flight-“ Namjoon began but the look on Jungkook’s face made him stop.

“DID I FUCKING STUTTER?”

Namjoon swore.

“Fucking hell… alright just calm the fuck down, Jesus…just put a fucking bullet in that girl’s head and spare us all the headache fuck…” He growled, unbuckling his seat belt and rushing to the cockpit and Yoongi groaned.

“ Let me guess you want me to get in touch with someone in Seoul and ask Hoseok to hold off on letting Seokjin near her…”

Jungkook glared at him.

“If you already know that why the fuck are you still here…” He growled and Yoongi gave him a look.

“Just tell her you’re in love with her and let us live, Jeon Jungkook.”

In love….. what the fuck….

He glared at Yoongi’s back, his asinine words making him madder. God he wanted to crush someone’s skull into dust with his bare hands.

And right now, in his head , that skull belonged to Jung fucking Hoseok.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“What just happened?” I asked, frantic staring at the door as Hoseok’s men casually led a fuming Seokjin away while the man himself stared at me, looking pale as parchment.

“ Jungkook found out.” He said shortly and I felt my heart drop although I was half relieved because there had been something insane in Kim Seokjin’s gaze when he’d reached for me , a cruel glint of hunger that told me he would have hurt me really badly if Hoseok hadn’t barged into the room , frantic and worried.

He had given Seokjin a wide smile and then, “ I’m so sorry. We were waiting on her blood results and turns out she has a…. well, certain occupational disease that is very infectious.”

Seokjin’s mouth had dropped open even wider than mine.

“I thought she was a fucking virgin.” He had snapped, and I flinched at how cold and furious he had sounded.

But apparently there was a reason this whole thing had happened.

“What do you mean Jungkook knows? What does that mean?” I asked frantically, fear taking over.

“ He’s heading back here… He wants to see you.”

I felt my entire body go ice cold as I shook my head…

“No…fucking no bring Seokjin back here , he can fuck me that was the fucking deal, Hobi, please don’t../…”

“Elena , I’m so fucking sorry.. Seokjin…he’s fucked in the head…. He likes hurting his whores, likes making them bleed and he would have fucking destroyed you…”

I gaped at him horrified.

“What?!” I hissed shaking my head in disbelief.

“He’s Jungkook’ stepbrother. I’ve arranged whores for him before, I knew he was a little crazy but I’d never seen him before and I didn’t know he was the Kim Seokjin…fuck he outbid everyone and fucker looks like a fucking angel, how the fuck was I supposed to know he’s unhinged? Thankfully, I messaged Yoongi and …. Fuck… Listen… I know I paid for your sister’s surgery but you’re going to have to pay me back….”

I felt my body convulse in rebellion.

“I can’t.. You know I fucking can’t…”

“I can’t make an enemy out of Jungkook…. I can’t.” Hoseok shook his head. “ You can get out of here now if you want but I’d advise you to stay. If you run it’s only going to make Jungkook angrier.”

“WHAT DID I FUCKING DO TO HIM?!!!” I screamed, feeling my composure crumble into smithereens. “WHAT THE FUCK DOES HE WANT FROM ME?!!”

Hoseok flinched, stepping back and holding his hands up.

“Whether I want to or not, I answer to Jungkook. I shouldn’t have done this in the first place , I’m sorry Elena.” He shook his head and stepped back like the coward that he was and I wanted to hurt him. To shake him and ask him to fucking remember who I was. That I had nothing to do with my father’s sins . That I had been a fucking marionette in his hands, had wanted nothing more than to be left alone.

I stared at him in disbelief.

“So much for being a friend…” I whispered.

His jaw tightened. But he didn’t look guilty. None of them ever did. It was like guilt didn’t exist in their world. They did what they wanted to whoever they wanted , whenever they wanted and they got away with it because that bastard’s word was law. What Jeon Jungkook wanted, he got.

“I’ll get your clothes sent in.”

I watched him leave, the door slamming shut behind him and sagged against the bed, staring at myself. What had just happened?

Was I born to endless misery and misfortune?

Couldn’t I catch a fucking break?

I’d agreed to sell myself hadn’t I? Would have even let Seokjin hurt me if that was what he wanted. Because it was one night. It was one night of this…whatever the hell this was and then freedom. That was the deal.

The door opened again and I stared as a young girl brought me a pile of my clothes neatly folded.

“Do you work here?” I said sharply.

She blinked before bowing her head.

“Yes, mistress.”

I scoffed.

“Don’t call me mistress , I’m here to get fucked, just like you. Tell me does Jungkook ever use the women here.” I demanded.

She looked trapped, glancing at the door, clearly wanting to run .

“Tell me.” I snapped and she flinched.

“I..uh..yes. Sometimes.” She said softly.

“Can you tell whoever fucks him next to kick him in the fucking balls?”

The girl bowed deeply and all but ran out and I sighed, feeling myself shaking. Jungkook was on the way here and I wanted to yell and scream and rave at him but I knew that was exactly what he wanted. I wanted to deny him the satisfaction …wanted to act all cool and composed in front of him but it was impossible…

Because I hadn’t realized just how tired I was of this whole thing, till right this moment, when the end had been in sight. I was supposed to get my two billion won pay off all the debt , give Jisoo the rest of the money and disappear. I was so tired, so tired of this life I’d gotten trapped into, slaving over for hours on end just to afford a couple of meals a day. No friends, no boyfriends, no hope of a future …..

The door banged open and I jumped, crawling back when I recognized the man who had just entered.

“Yoongi-“

“Jungkook wants to see you.” He ground out and I swallowed.

“I need to get dressed. Please just wait outside.” I said shakily.

And then the door opened further and a tall looming shadow stepped in familiar and vomit inducing.

Jungkook looked livid, piercing glinting through the dimply lit room and I stared at him. He was dressed in a tight black t shirt, he sleeves stretched thin over his biceps and the tattoos stark against his skin.

“Leave us.” He said softly and Yoongi moved away to the door leaving me alone with the devil himself. I cursed myself for not putting at least my panties on, I was naked underneath this shirt and although it was big it left nothing to the imagination.

Jungkook’s eyes raked over my form before resting on my face.

“You think you’re smart enough to outsmart me, Elena?” He whispered softly.

I swallowed.

“Send you brother back in. He can fuck me and I’ll pay you back.”

Jungkook hummed, stepping closer and grabbing my clothes from the bed, he grabbed the plain white bra and the pastel pink underwear and then to my complete and utter mortification he brought the clothing up to his face, breathing in .

“Fucking pervert!!!” I screamed, feeling the action like a physical touch and wanting to claw his eyes out and the smirk on his face told me that this was exactly what he wanted but I was too fucking gone to care.

“If you want me to be a whore, fine. I’ll be a whore. But on my terms…” I spat out and he shook his head, laughing.

“I don’t just want you to be a whore, Elena. I want everyone to know that you are one…” He dropped my clothes and moved closer, holding a hand out. “ Come here.”

I stared at the inked fingers, adorned with sterling silver rings and bracelets with the motifs of his gang. I shook my head.

“No. I’m not playing this game with you.” I turned my face away.

His hand shot out gripping my upper arm with enough strength to bruise and I screamed, agony shooting up my arm and shoulders as he dragged me off the bed and onto the floor. I landed hard, hips and elbows bruising from impact and I stared at him in disbelief.

“I’ve been to gentle with you. You’ve forgotten your fucking place.” He bent over and grabbed me by my hair, yanking me to my feet so hard that it felt like my scalp had been ripped away from my skull.

“Okay…okay…Okay Jungkook..just…!!” I said softly, flinching because my pain tolerance was almost zero and Jungkook’s grip was so hard that my eyes were beginning to water now. He let me go, grabbing my panties off the floor and tossing them at me.

“I’m going to count to five. Put those on and get out.”

He walked out of the door and I stumbled a little fumbling with the fabric before quickly, slipping my legs in and yanking it up to my waist. I made to put on something else but his voice came, loud and impatient.

“Get the fuck out here.”

I walked out of the door and he was standing there next to Hoseok. I couldn’t meet either of their gazes , hating how they had so much power over my life. I stared at the floor. It was tempting to yell at them and scream but that never led anywhere.

“ I’ve asked them to stop the payment on the Hospital bill. Seeing as Elena hasn’t kept her end of the bargain.”

I felt my breath hitch at that, willing down the tears as I glared at him.

“What do you want?” I snapped. “ Tell me who you want me to fuck…. I’ll do it. Let’s get this over with so you can go back to whatever sewer you fucking climbed out of. ….”

Hoseok’s breath caught like he couldn’t believe what I’d just said and the look in his eye was a warning but I was sick of this. Sick of them all.

Jungkook turned to Hoseok with a laugh.

“You see hyung? See why I can’t let her go? If I let her scot free, everyone’s going to think I’m a pushover….that any worthless bitch can talk to me any way she wants and get away with it….” He shook his head, staring at me with a glint in his eye. “ I’m not going to choose. They are. You think you can charm your way into Hoseok’s heart and get special treatment? You think you’re ready to be a whore, Elena? Let me show you how a real whore gets treated in Hoseok’s club.”

He gripped my wrist, yanking me behind him as he stalked off down the narrow corridor that opened up into the club. I let myself get dragged out into the club dismally aware of the fact that I was wearing nothing but Hoseok’s shirt. I could feel eyes on me but I kept mine on the back of Jungkook’s head as he dragged me all the way to the front. I knew what he was going to do and at this point I was just numb.

There was no point reasoning with the devil.

I glared at him as he pointed at the stage. “ Get up there.” He whispered harshly.

I stared back at him, not moving. I saw Jungkook’s jaw clench.

“Either you go up there by yourself, with your clothes on. Or I carry you up there, after stripping you naked. What’s it going to be? ”

I glared at him, pursing my lips before climbing up using the small stair in the side. I moved to the center, right in front of the stage lights, so the rest of the room would disappear. I had no wish to see any of the bastards in the room.

“I think all of you recognize this little beauty here, don’t you?” Jungkook’s voice was cheerful, friendly even and I bit my lips, fists clenched. “ Well, if you don’t let me tell you . This is Gong Hyo Suk’s daughter. Remember that bastard? He put a hit out on my father. Killed him and my mom on the night I was supposed to be marrying his fucking daughter. A daughter who later called off the wedding, because I was too poor now, to give her the life she deserved. ”

I felt the familiar ice cold guilt in my vein. I was seventeen, I wanted to scream. I was seventeen and all I did was say what my father asked me to say, do what my father asked me to do.

“ That was nine fucking years ago… and you know what I told myself…. I told myself, that a greedy little bitch like this, doesn’t deserve shit.” He laughed. “ If money’s what she values the most, then the only thing she deserves is to be treated like the whore she is.”

“Why don’t you guys tell me, how much money you’d be willing to spend, to fuck her? Come on, Hobi’s been treating you guys so well lets help him make some money tonight… be generous. ”

I could barely hear what they were calling out but when Jungkook climbed onto the stage next to me, I jumped. Moving back instinctively, I winced when brought a forearm around my throat nearly choking me as he dragged up against his body.

“90 million won….That’s a lot.” He grinned. “ Jihan hyung….. that was you right? You’re gonna pay 90 million won for her?”

I felt my heart race, it was a lot. More than enough for the Hospital Bills, would even leave extra to get a decent apartment somewhere... I grabbed his wrist as it pressed into my throat, trying to pull his hand off me but he just wrapped his free hand around my waist, wrapping his entire body around mine and chuckling into my hair.

Jungkook pressed his head against mine and I froze, hating the close contact.

“Okay…but since I’m feeling a bit left out here…Why don’t I pitch in… 500 Won.” Jungkook said loud and clear.

I froze. An eerie silence fell over the club, laughter stilling and the clink of glasses slowing down.

What.

I struggled to get away from his but his hold tightened.

“Anyone else?” He called out. “ Come on… Not even thousand? Surely you think this one here’s worth a thousand won? Aren’t you going to outbid me?”

No one responded of course they didn’t. Jungkook’s anger was palpable and no one was going to get on his wrong side …..

“Ahh… is that it then? Bid’s going to close for 500 won then…. Hear that baby?” He whispered against my ears and I swallowed. “ 90, million won to five hundred won in a few seconds… What does that tell you?”

“It tells me you’re a fucking psychopath in love with your own voice… Get off me.” I hissed.

“No. What it tells you is that only I get to decide how much that body of yours is worth, not you. . You don’t get to go sell your fucking body behind my back for two billion won and then pay off all your debts and ride off into the sunset, that is not how this works….”

I went limp in his arms fighting tears because he never played fair. Never.

“Hear that Hoseok-ah… I win her for the night for 500 won…fair and square…. Is that alright?” He called out into the darkness and I felt the first inkling of dread begin to seep in.

“No.. No… get off me.” I hissed and he laughed, dragging me off the stage with ease. I screamed, kicking out in disbelief.

Jungkook grinned at me, before grabbing both my arms and yanking them behind me, and I whimpered, unable to move as he easily pulled me along to the door that opened into the hallway. Behind us I heard Hoseok’s voice.

“Jungkook, don’t be impulsive. Think about whatever you’re going to do.”

I flinched at that, panic building.

“He’s not going to do anything. I’ll fucking kill him if he touches me , I-“

“Shut the fuck up, you little bitch.” He shook me hard till my teeth rattled and I sobbed out.

“Jungkook…” Hoseok warned but he merely snarled.

“I know what I’m doing hyung, just…. Don’t disturb us. And make sure everyone here knows that she’s open for business.” It was loud enough to carry through the club and I felt humiliation burn my throat, acrid like acid.

I froze in disbelief.

“Jungkook …” Hoseok’s voice held a tone of reproach.

“ And tell them that her body is amazing. Tell them she spent the night with me , the best fuck I’ve ever had , mouth made for cock.”

I stared straight ahead as he pulled me all the way to the room we had left earlier and I tripped when he shoved me inside, landing on my hands and knees . I quickly rolled back around to land on my ass, crawling back as he slammed the door shut and locked it from the inside.

He stared down at me, mouth grim.

“You do owe me a wedding night. I was so ready to fuck your tight cunt, nine years ago… I think I’ve waited long enough yeah.”

I stared at him in disbelief. I knew exactly what he wanted me to do, to yell and scream and protest and fight so he could get off and forcing me…. Fucking psychopath.

I took a deep breath and nodded.

“If you pay for my sister in laws bills, and give me an apartment sure. “ I shrugged. “You’re not any different from any of the bastards here. I don’t give a damn which one of you idiots wants to rut into me like the absolute animal that you are…. I don’t care…” I said softly.

“you don’t? Really? You want me to tell you what your brother said when one of my men put a gun into his mouth…. He begged for his life…said he had a kid on the way….” Jungkook laughed, shaking his head. “I told him it was better than what his father did…. My sister was six months pregnant when his lieutenant gunned her down on the streets.”

I shuddered, wrapping my arms around myself.

“Why are you telling me this…” I snapped.

“Because she didn’t deserve it did she, Elena? She didn’t fucking deserve to die like that , like a dog on the street when she had nothing to do with any of this…. She didn’t deserve it.” He growled, bending down and gripping my chin hard.

“Maybe she did deserve it.” I spat out. “ If I deserve to be here, maybe your sister deserved to die too. “

He snarled, hand flying to my hair and dragging me up off the floor in one sharp yank. I whimpered as he pushed me on the bed, before climbing on top of me. I felt like every bone in my body was about to snap in two, the weight of him unbearable on me.

“I won the bid tonight…. I won it fair and square… You signed the waiver didn’t you…that you agreed to the auction…I won and I’m going to fucking collect.” He growled, and I kicked out, trying to buck him off of my body.

“Get off me.” I hissed. “ I’m not letting you fuck me for 500 won.”

“How about for your Jisoo then?” He whispered and I went still.

“What?”

He chuckled, reaching down and I felt my pulse pound as he pulled his phone out, dialing quickly and turning on the speakers.

Yoongi’s voice made me go ice cold. Everyone knew what Yoongi did for Jungkook.

“Daehwan’s wife is in a hospital room in Yongsan. Hobi’s got the details. I think she’s served her purpose.”

“No!! JUNGKOOK NO!!” I screamed , thrashing so hard my head began to spin but he grunted pressing down into me harder.

“Are you serious? I’m not home yet… I can take care of it tonight.” Yoongi said, voice casual and I sobbed, shaking my head in sheer terror.

“Okay… I’ll behave.. I promise.. please just don’t…”

Jungkook hummed.

“Well, that was easy… Yoongi-yah… why don’t you stay on the phone yeah…. Going to get that wedding night I’m owed and if my baby doesn’t co operate you know what to do, yeah?”

I bit my lips, glaring into the sheets as he gripped my waist, pulling me up.

“Ass up like the bitch that you are, baby.” He whispered and I felt my entire body shudder in disgust. It was worse because I hadn’t done this before. Didn’t know what to expect. But I couldn’t let him know that. If Jungkook knew that I was a virgin, I could just imagine how much fun he’d have with that info.

Hands gripped my wrists, pinning them to the bed and I turned my face away when I felt the press of his lips on my cheeks. He gripped both my wrists with one hand, keeping them pinned over my head and I flinched when I felt his fingers pulling the fabric of my panties aside, just enough for the blunt head of his cock to press against my slit.

“Yoongi, you there?” Jungkook said softly and Yoongi grunted over the phone. I felt my face flame in embarrassment.

“You’re a sick bastard but I’m used to it. What’s up?” he said casually.

“Remember how we used to wonder just how tight Elena’s cunt was… back when we were in school.”

Fucking monster, I thought in disbelief. I hate him I hate him I hate him….

“Good times…” Yoongi chuckled lightly .

Jungkook pushed into me in one hard thrust and pain shot straight up my spine, my insides burning like he’d fucked me with a knife and not his body. I couldn’t stop the cry of agony that got torn of me, my eyes tearing up and tears spilling over onto my cheeks.

“Damn Jungkook, she okay?” Yoongi’s chuckle made me want to claw his face off, and just the urge to kill was growing inside me.

“Well, I can confirm that it is, in fact just as tight as we thought…” He grunted, thrusting into me at a pace that was inhumane, every push and drag of him rubbing my insides raw and I bit down on the sheets under me, afraid that I would do something absolutely humiliating, like beg him to stop.

“Good, you should let me take that tight ass for a ride someday then. With her permission of course…. I’m a gentleman after all. Big on consent.” He laughed and I swallowed the urge to tell him that I would puncture his balls with a switchblade if he came anywhere near me.

“Oh, she’s going to do whatever I ask her to….aren’t you baby…” He grunted, “ Turn around so I can see you.”

He pulled out of me, his weight lifting off my body as he moved away. I couldn’t move, limbs numb and insides throbbing in pain . His palm landed on my thigh, hard and the sharp sting of it made me jump.

“I said turn around, I want to see your face when I fuck you.” Jungkook growled. I stayed limp, breathing hard and he grunted impatient, fingers sinking into my hair , yanking me to my knees and the movement made my legs scream in protest.

“How’s she so quiet? You fucked the voice out of her, kook-ah?” Yoongi asked amused and Jungkook pulled me by the hair, dragging me to the center and pushing me down till my head landed on the pillow.

“Hyung you should see her right now, all fucked out …. Like she’s never had a dick in her before.” He shook his head, “ Fucking slut. Take that off and hold yourself open for me.”

I stared at him, uncomprehending and he grabbed both my hands, placing them on my knees.

“Grab your knees and pull your legs back… So I can fuck that tight cunt the way I want to.” He said slowly, like I was a dog he was trying to train and I stared at him , defiantly.

“ Go to hell.” I whispered.

Yoongi’s laughter came from somewhere to the right.

“Your dirty talk needs work, Kook ah… Tell her she’s a precious little kitten and she makes you feel really good…. Bitches love that shit…”

Jungkook hovered over me, grabbing the back of my thighs and spreading them wide enough to make me whimper in pain.

“Is that so babygirl? You want me to tell you that? That you make daddy’s cock feel good?” He cooed, nudging the tip against me again and I had never hated anyone so much in my life. I stared up at his face, and he smiled at me, a cheeky little grin that made his bunny teeth stand out and for a second he looked so deceptively angelic and the glimmer of his piercing caught my eye.

I couldn’t help but swallow, gaze trained on the glint of metal on his tongue.

“You like that?” He grinned suddenly, sticking his tongue out for me to see, I felt my eyes widen at how sinfully good he looked .” Hyung she likes my tongue piercing.”

“Show her how it feels on her clit.” Yoongi laughed and I could barely fully process what I heard before Jungkook was crawling down my body, arms, curling on my thighs and yanking me onto his tongue .

I felt the press of his tongue on my slit, licking right into me and the jolt of pleasure was so unexpected, the pleasure so unwanted and yet so overwhelming and I couldn’t stop the way my body thrashed against the streets, lips parted as I practically mewled out in pleasure.

“Definitely a kitten…” Yoongi called out and I shuddered as Jungkook slipped two fingers into me , the ice cold press of his ring inside me making me jump. I wanted to pull away, grab his hair and yank him off but I couldn’t because it was

“Next time I’ll put the dick piercing in too, yeah? Fuck you with a bit of metal on my cock so you can feel that up there…. ” He laughed into my thighs and I screamed when he bit into the flesh there , hard.

“I’m getting bored… Either turn on facetime so I can at least jerk off to this , or I’m hanging up…” Yoongi called out .

“Hyung she clenches down on me every time she hears your voice… Just stay on for a few more minutes yeah, she tastes so fucking good, I’m gonna cum soon….” Jungkook added another finger, slipping in deep before spreading them apart inside me. I whimpered when he pushed his tongue in between the wet digits, licking into my walls and I could feel the ball of his piercing drag against my walls, ice cold and hard.

Was it fucked up that I did clench down on him again, my body apparently a slave to my base desires even as my mind screamed that he was the absolute worst bastard on the face of the planet.

“Elena, you owe me a blowjob at least for this…” Yoongi called out and I glared at the phone.

“I’ll bite your fucking dick off if you come anywhere near me.” I snapped.

“Fuck, I could get off just to that mouthy fuckhole of hers…..” Yoongi grunted.

Jungkook pulled away, climbing back up over me and lightly slapping my breasts.

“Now, how about you open that mouth and let me fuck it?”

Yoongi snorted from behind us and Jungkook glared at the phone before glaring at me again.

“Well?”

“You want to know how hard I can bite?” I said sharply, the pleasure ebbing away into nothing and resentment taking it place, the momentarily physicality of the situation fading and the reminder of who he was and who I was entering my sex addled brain.

“No.. You’re right…. But you know what, I’m not feeling it anymore. I was right.. you really aren’t qualified to be my whore. Your body…it’s frigid like a fucking popsicle…such a fucking turn off. ” He reached over and hung up on the phone.

“Now…”he whispered, leaning in closer and I yelped, when his fingers closed over my throat..” Shut your mouth and take what I give you like a grateful bitch.”

I swallowed when he pushed into me again, his pace steady as he fucked into me, eyes closed and I realized that he was almost fully dressed having just unbuttoned himself enough to get his cock out.

When he stiffened, spilling into me his eyes blew open and he locked eyes with me, wide eyed and for one horrible second he looked young and vulnerable and hurt.

I blinked as he pulled out, the sticky warm mess of his cum dripping down my inner thighs and onto the sheets.

“Well, that was much worse than I thought it would be.” He said and I stayed on the bed as he grabbed his phone and buttoned himself back up.

He smirked at me and then reached into his pocket.

I quickly pulled myself together, ignoring the aches and pains and getting to my knees before reaching for my dress on the bed. it was kind of pointless because I still had Hoseok’s shirt on and I wasn’t going to take that off in front of Jungkook.

“Well, I’m a man of my word , Elena so…here you go..just as we discussed.” He tossed a coin on the bed and I stared at the engraved 500 on the shiny surface, feeling my rage swell inside me.

“If you still want to work out a payment plan for your sister’s bills …. Why don’t you come to my office tomorrow?” He tossed his card on the bed before moving away to the door.

Fucking bastard.

Author’s note : My whole life is filled with regrets .

#jungkook smut #bts smut #ts fics #jungkook fics #bts fanfic #jungkook mafia au #bts mafia au

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titanicsimp · 4 years ago

Text

Been too long

Pairing: Reiner Braun x Female!reader

Genres: Smut/lemon, fluff

Warnings: Sexual content including; vaginal sex, creampie, oral, general foreplay. Brief mentions of injury and trauma

Summary: You have known Reiner since you were both kids, and though life has separated you, a second chance might be in sight.

A/N: I finally wrote a story about my n1 love 🥺

It’s been over a decade since you’ve last seen Reiner, not counting the little glimpses at parades. It’s odd, the two of you had been so close when you were kids. You had known Reiner since he was 6 years old, and you had stuck to him like glue till the very last day before he went on his mission.

When you had finally pushed yourself to the front of the crowd the day Reiner had returned from paradise island, you looked straight at him, and he had looked back, but his gaze had been vacant. You had been too taken aback to wave or say anything. He had looked straight through you.

From your glimpses and the rumors you had overheard, it was clear that Reiner had changed. You refused to hear the whispers in the alleys about him having lost his mind. He might be not be the same anymore, but you knew that he would never give up. He was strong, not only a warrior by rank. Yet you would be lying if you said you weren’t worried.

❦

Now Reiner had returned from war once again, you were determined to at least speak to him this time. You followed the parade all the way up to the hall where the Warriors gathered and situated yourself outside the building. The guards made you anxious, but the fact that you’re an honorary Marleyan kept you relatively safe. It was okay for you to be there, unless it started taking too long.

When Reiner finally exited the building, you said a quick prayer to the gods and stepped out of the shadows.

“Reiner!”

He kept walking, seemingly so lost in thought he didn’t hear you.

“Reiner!” You tried again, quickly walking after him.

Reiner turned around suddenly, a warning look on his face. You gulped and instinctively took a step back.

When he realized it was you, his expression softened and then turned to confusion as he mumbled your name. “It is you, right?”

You smiled at him shyly. “Yes, it’s me.”

Now you got a good look at his appearance, your heart skipped a beat. His haircut had changed, and he had grown a beard, but the most striking was the way he had aged. Sure, he seemed older than he was, but he looked incredibly handsome.

“Sorry to hunt you down like this, but I really had to talk to you.” You told Reiner and nervously rubbed at your arm.

Your rubbing turned his attention to your arm, making him notice the red band around it. The sight of it made his expression turn cold.

“You.. got married?” He questioned.

You frowned, confused at the sudden question. When you noticed what he was glancing at, you realized why he thought so.

“Oh! No, I’m not married. I’m a doctor, actually.” You told him and couldn’t help but sound a bit proud. The work you had to put in for that band had been exhausting and neverending, but you made it.

Reiner scratched the back of his head and looked away from you. “I see, my apologies.”

Disappointment settled over you at his standoffish attitude. Was he not even slightly excited to see you?

You tried to shake off the feeling and gave him a smile. “It’s alright, we haven’t seen each other for a while... Perhaps we can catch up?”

The glint in his eyes gave you hope, but that quickly faded as he shook his head and sighed. “I don’t have time.”

No, you wouldn’t cry, no matter how much that stung. Looking into his eyes like this and still feeling alone was the worst.

“Ah, of course.”

Reiner turned his back to you and you watched him walk off, your heart feeling like a brick inside your chest.

❦

Another month passed and you heard nothing from Reiner, so you told yourself you were over it. If he thought you would first wait 9 years and then some more he was sorely mistaken!

You angrily pursed your lips at your thoughts as you picked out tomatoes at the market. Forget about him already.

You had filled your bag with the needed tomatoes and had paid the salesman when you turned to be on your merry way, but instead stepped right into someone’s chest.

“Gods! Ever heard of personal space?!” You grumbled as you backed off.

Your face paled when you recognized who you had bumped into. Reiner was peering down at you with that serious face of his.

“Sorry about that.”

You casted your eyes down, heaving your bag over your shoulder. “I-it’s fine, I didn’t realize it was you.”

He simply nodded at your words. You were uncertain as to what he wanted as he stared at you in silence. He didn’t even seem sure himself as to what he was doing.

You cleared your throat. “So, what is a warrior doing at the market?”

Reiner raised the basket in his left hand. “I’m getting vegetables for mother.”

A smile clawed it’s way onto your face. You guessed he was still a mommas boy. “That’s very nice of you, Reiner.”

More silence and staring followed before he finally decided on something to say.

“What clinic do you work at?” He asked.

You chuckled at the question. “How many do we Eldians have?”

The corners of Reiner’s mouth quirked up slightly. “Right.”

It made you feel nervous when you made eye contact with him, like you were a teenager again. “Well, if you ever get injured, you are free to visit.”

As soon as you said it you felt like hitting yourself. “But Warriors regenerate... oops.”

You waved off your own comments. “Injured or not, you are more than welcome.”

Reiner seemed amused, and you were unsure if it was because you were making a fool out of yourself or not, but it made you happy to see him warm up slightly.

“See you.. soon.” He said and waved you off, leaving you with a flushed face to match your tomatoes.

❦

A week later, you just got done with a long shift at the hospital and were getting ready to leave. Even though the soldiers had been back for some time, more and more kept showing up. Some that weren’t healing, some that were traumatized beyond believe, and some that had never come to get treatment and now their wounds were festering. It was exhausting, and terrible to witness, but you were happy you could at least do something to help them.

Darkness had already settled over the town when you exited the hospital grounds. When you turned the corner next to the gate you felt your heart jump in your throat at the sight of a silhouette.

“Hello?”

The figure stepped out of the darkness after you called out to it. You sighed with relief when you saw it was Reiner. “Gods Reiner, you scared me.”

“Sorry.” He said and stook his hands into his pockets.

“It’s alright.” You looked around the area. “Were you waiting for me?”

His lips quirked into a tiny smile. “I told you I would visit.”

That he actually did made you so happy. Perhaps he hasn’t grown as cold towards you as you first thought.

“Yeah, you did. You could’ve just come in though, it’s pretty cold out here.”

Reiner shrugged. “I’m fine. Join me on a walk?”

You nodded and gave him a warm smile. “Of course.”

He lead you through the dim alleyways and you wondered what he was planning. You were expecting him to say something, but he seemed to be mauling over every word again.

When you entered the plaza you knew why he took you here instantly. It was quiet, the cobbling of fountain in the middle of the square the only sound. It was peaceful like this, not crowded like during the day.

Reiner turned to face you, looking slightly nervous. “This is where-“

“I remember.”

The day before he had left for paradise island the two of you had snuck out and met up here. You could still remember how thrilling it had been.

You shook your head and looked down at the uneven street. “Why did you take me here?”

“I... I remembered you liked the fountain.” He responded, a slight shake noticibale in his voice.

“Reiner...” You looked at the small fountain. “If you remember, then you know why I’m not happy.”

His face, so young and hopeful, was still clear in your memories. He had been overjoyed he was now a warrior, finally having reached what he felt he needed to. It had given him the courage to tell you he liked you, and he had promised you he would return so you had to...

“Wait for me.”

You turned back to face Reiner. “That’s what you told me.��

He made a face like you just struck him, distress in his eyes. “I-I know. That wasn’t fair of me.”

You shook your head and laughed sadly. “It wouldn’t have been unfair if you had actually come for me when you returned.”

“I wanted to...” He gripped his forehead with his hand. “But the Reiner I had promised you died long ago.”

“It was too late.”

You took a step closer and felt tears sting at your eyes. “You’re right, it was too late.”

Reiner’s fingers clenched at your confirmation.

“It was too late for those kids, but not for us as we are now, Reiner.” You told him.

You chuckled. “I mean, I’m sure as hell not the same as I was 9 years ago, why would I expect you to be?!”

Silence fell as Reiner let your words sink in, dropping his hand from his face in shock. You could sense his doubt, and you felt it too. There were zero guarantees that you would fall for each other again, but you felt it in your heart that you had to give it a chance.

“I’m not asking you to feel the same way you did all those years ago. I just want you in my life, friend or lover.”

He remained silent for another minute before he spoke up. “Are you sure?”

You smiled and blinked away the tears that had built up. “I am.”

Reiner stepped closer to you hesitantly. “I don’t want to burden you. I’m not-“

You took one of his hands into yours. “I don’t care what you’re not! I want the Reiner that you are, nothing more and nothing less.”

He looked both terrified and happy with you’re declaration. You were scared he would pull his hand back, but he let you hold it. When he looked down at your joined hands, he seemed to relax slightly.

No more words were exchanged, there was no need to. His eyes spoke volumes, and you had said all you wanted to. In silence the two of you reunited, and a new promise was formed.

❦

The tavern is crowded tonight, the people of Marley having been in a surprisingly joyous mood lately. Pints are spread over the table in front of you and your group excitedly chats away with each other, some blaring instead of talking after having a few too many beers.

You had felt so nervous to join the Warriors tonight. Sure, in the last few months you had seen them around and had brief conversations with them, but sharing a whole evening with them was new.

In the end you had been worried about nothing. Zeke, Porco and Pieck had been more than welcoming, and not a single thing regarding their statuses had been brought up. Tonight they had just been people, and you were happy to see this side of them.

You lean back into Reiner’s arm, peaking up at your boyfriend. He raises his eyebrows and glances between you and Porco who is drunkenly arguing with Zeke about what beer brew is the best. You chuckle and roll your eyes at Reiner.

Your heart had been right. It had been a rocky road, and you both still had a lot to figure out, but after years of pining and separation you could finally call him yours.

“My, my, seems like those two had a bit too much.” Pieck notes with a laugh.

Zeke and Porco have quickly moved on from arguing and are now half sleeping on each other.

You laugh as well. “You think so?”

Pieck shakes her head disapprovingly, but her smile stays. She pushes at the men’s shoulders, but besides mumbles she gets no response. “I’ll have to carry them back home. What a pain.”

You sit up. “We’ll help you get them back.”

No way you’re letting poor Pieck drag them back all by herself, walking alone is already enough of a hassle for her.

You look at Reiner, who gives you a hesitant nod.

“Thank you!” Pieck says happily and sighs in relief.

The three of you stand up, rounding the table to haul the drunkards up. You and Pieck carry Porco while Reiner takes care of Zeke. You are happy you have experience with dragging men around in the hospital, otherwise this would be even harder.

“Come to think of it, you haven’t visited our place before have you?” Pieck asks you as the two of you carry Porco through the streets.

You shake your head. “No, I haven’t.”

She glances over at Reiner, who is walking a bit ahead. “I suppose it’s not much to show off.”

You all walk on in silence as you ponder if there’s a reason he hasn’t taken you there.

You meet up with Reiner in the hallway after everyone has been brought to bed and you have said your goodbyes to Pieck.

“I can bring you home.” He tells you.

You frown and shake your head. “I’d rather go to your room, unless you mind?”

He regards you for a moment before he gestures you to follow him. “I don’t.”

When you see his room, you get an idea as to why he didn’t want you to see it. There’s a one person bed, a chair, a desk, and a gun. The walls are painted grey, not decorated in any way.

“It’s... cozy.” You struggle to say.

Reiner sighs behind you as he closes the door. “It’s nothing.”

You turn around and throw your arms around his neck. “Should I be offended you don’t have any pictures of me?”

He quirks his eyebrows. “I don’t remember you giving me any.”

You laugh at his seriousness. “I suppose I’ll have to chance that then.”

You lean in to kiss him, but he frees himself from your grip and takes a step back.

“Reiner?”

It hurts to see him shrink away from you like this.

“Did I do something wrong? We’ve kissed before.” You ask him.

Reiner shakes his head and walks towards his bed, sitting down on it with a troubled look. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“What’s wrong then?” You question, your confusion resonating in your voice.

“I should just bring you home.” He says and stands up.

Before he can take a step towards the door, you stop him, putting your hands against his chest. “No! If I’m going too fast or if you don’t want me, just tell me, please.”

“What? Of course I want you! But I can’t-“

You feel frustration starting to bubble inside of you. “Why can’t you?!”

“Right now you can leave!” He shouts out. “If we... I don’t want you to feel tied to me.”

His pained expression absolutely breaks your heart. Gods, you would do anything to bring the peace his mind needs.

You cup his face in your hands. “Reiner, I’m here because I want to be here. I don’t want to leave, I want to be with you.”

“In every way I can be.”

“I think-“ Reiner starts but you give him a quick kiss.

“Stop thinking.”

You stroke his hair out of his face. “If you want me, then please, take me.”

Convinced, he grabs your hands in his and kisses you. His lips move against yours roughly, his kiss desperate.

His hands let go off yours and instead start exploring your body through your clothes. You gasp into the kiss as he cups your breasts, allowing him the opportunity to slip his tongue past your lips.

Your tongue tangles with Reiner’s, your body heating up from his touches. You rest one of your hands onto his shoulder as you grab the back of his neck with the other.

Gods, how long have you wanted this? The fact that it’s finally happening is dizzying.

Not breaking the kiss, he picks you up and carries you to the bed. You mewl as he presses his body to yours. You can feel the heat radiating from his skin even through the layers of clothing.

You are left panting when Reiner breaks the kiss, needing more. It feels like a dream when he starts unbuttoning your blouse and you shiver when the air hits your exposed skin.

He drinks in the sight of you, gaze gliding over you chest slowly.

“Worth the wait?” You tease but blush regardless.

Reiner gives you a smile, and it’s bigger than usual. You melt at the sight. How hard you have fallen for this man yet again.

“Ten times over.” He mumbles as he moves to take off your skirt.

You feel yourself growing slick with excitement as your left only in your underwear underneath him. He hooks his fingers into your panties, but your stop him.

“You first.” You say and tug at his button up.

Complying, Reiner sits up slightly between your legs and takes off his button up and undershirt.

You smile and run your hands over his now exposed chest. His muscles feel so good under your hands that it makes you regret not taking him to bed sooner.

He chuckles at your fascinated expression. Even though he’s glad that you ogle him just as much as he does you, he’s impatient to finally have you fully.

Reiner swiftly takes off his pants, giving you another smile when he’s left in his underwear. “Seems it’s your turn again.”

You giggle and shake off your blouse completely. You unclasp your bra and slowly take it off to tease Reiner. He groans when your breasts are finally exposed, his hands coming up to squeeze them immediately.

He leans his broad form over you, capturing your mouth in a kiss as he fondles your breasts. You wrap your arms around his neck and moan into his mouth.

When he gently squeezes and rubs your nipples, you arch up into his touch. He breaks off the kiss, dragging his tongue over your bottom lip before he moves down. He kisses a trail down from your neck to your breasts before licking over your nipple.

“Reiner!” You moan out encouragingly.

He flicks your nipple with his tongue and sucks softly before he moves on to do the same to the other.

After giving your breasts several more kisses, he moves down again. Your breath hitches when he reaches the hem of your panties.

Reiner looks up at you, and you can easily read his expression, ‘Is this is okay?’, and you mumble a quick yes under your breath. He slides your panties down your legs and throws them to the side.

He lovingly kisses the top of your mount before he lets his tongue slide against the sensitive skin next to your folds. He teasingly continues licking around it before he finally dips into your core.

You thrash your legs at the feeling of his tongue lapping at your slit, and in response he grabs you by your thighs to keep you still.

Moans leave your lips when Reiner pushes his tongue past your entrance. He groans lustfully when he tastes you, making you blush.

He moves his tongue in and out of you eagerly till you feel like you are drenching his face.

When he feels your thigh muscles clench under his grip, he knows you’re close. He takes his tongue of you and you whine in protest.

Your protests are quickly silenced when Reiner’s tongue starts playing with your clit. He slides two of his thick fingers into you while he licks and suck at your clit. You see stars as his finges inside you curl to hit your sweet spot while his tongue drags circles over your sensitive nub.

“Yes! Yes!” You scream out as you cum.

Your walls quiver around his fingers as he continues moving them to ride out your orgasm.

When Reiner removes his mouth and fingers from your cunt, you give him a satisfied smile, telling him without words that he did well.

His hands stroke over your thighs. “I’ve dreamed of this so many times, but this is better anything I could’ve imagined.”

You sit up, which seems to surprise him. You quickly erase the fear of you stopping this from his mind by stroking your hand over the bulge in his underwear.

Fuck he’s big. His cock is straining against the fabric, his precum staining it already.

“I need to know what you taste like as well.” You whisper seductively and take off his underwear.

You do your best to hide your gulp when you see for yourself how big Reiner is. That thing is going to fill you the brim, but that’s exactly what you want.

You bend over, arching your back in the hope your ass looks good as you take his cock into your hand. He groans breathily when you stroke him, and you feel him tense up and stutter when you wrap your lips around the head. His reactions sound like music to your ears and make you eager to for more.

Deciding to focus on the head of his cock first, you drag your tongue flat over it and then circle it. Reiner’s hand goes to the back of your head, lightly gripping your hair as you start sucking.

When his cock twitches in your mouth, you hollow your cheeks and sink the first few inches into it. You don’t take him into your throat yet, first working your way up and down so you can get used to it.

His groans and pants start increasing and you can tell he’s getting close. Mustering your courage, you breath in through your nose and slide the rest of his inches into throat.

“Shit!” He curses and the hand in your hair tightens.

You keep still like that for a second, savoring the sounds he’s making. When you start taking his cock in and out of your throat, it’s Reiner’s turn to see stars.

Surprisingly, you are doing better than you expected. You are convinced that only he can make a cock down your throat feel good.

“Fuck, you need to stop or I’ll cum.” He chokes out.

You look up at him, and he can tell you have no intend of doing so. Instead you slightly speed up your motions, and it doesn’t take long before Reiner forces you to still on his cock.

He shudders as he cums into your mouth, keeping your face snugly against his pelvis as he does so. You wanted to taste him, and now you are. He doesn’t disappoint either and you happily swallow the ropes of cum he spurts down your throat.

After he lets you pull away, you swallow the remaining cum in your mouth and give him a smile.

Reiner’s face is just as flushed as yours now. “Gods that felt good, but you didn’t have to.” He pants.

You giggle as you wipe off your mouth. “I know, but I wanted to.” You grab onto his shoulders and guide him to lay back down with you. “And I’ll do it again.”

Your words make him grunt in anticipation. His cock is still hard, and as he retakes his place between your legs you feel it poke at your cunt.

You wrap your arms and legs around him and take in his face. You note his stern eyebrows and the little frown creases between them, the slight bump on the bridge of his nose, his sharp jaw and so many more little things. You want to remember them all, so even if he goes away again, you’ll carry them with you.

“Are you ready?” He asks you, pressing a kiss to your forehead.

You nod and give him a smile which he returns. After your confirmation, he positions his cock at your entrance and slowly starts pressing in.

The old bed creaks underneath your combined weight as he presses closer to your body, his cock sliding in and stretching your walls.

“Reiner!” You squeal in pleasure when he bottoms out in you. You feel so full of him.

One of Reiner’s hands strokes your hair out off your face and you can tell it feels so good for him as well.

He gently starts sliding his cock in and out of you, letting you adjust to his size before he goes harder.

You moan and writhe underneath him, experimentally bucking your hips to meet his thrusts now and then. The dull throb of pain that was present at first quickly having faded into intense pleasure.

Reiner groans your name over and over when he starts going faster. You’re so soaked from you earlier activities that your cunt makes a lewd sound every time he thrusts in, filling the room with even more noise. Neither of you care about whether or not someone hears, too lost in each other.

One of his hands moves to stroke your clit while fucking you. Your eyes roll back as your walls twitch around his cock in reaction to the extra stimulation.

“Yes! Don’t stop!” You cry out, feeling your orgasm approach you overwhelmingly fast.

Reiner continues rubbing circles over your clit, giving it gentle pinches now and then and making sure he keeps fucking you at this fast pace.

You grab onto the hair at his neck as you cum, too overtaken by pleasure to notice. He curses but doesn’t mind it, continuing to slip in and out of you. Your cunt feels so good, tightly wrapped around his cock as you cum, that you could do anything to him right now and he wouldn’t care.

Your breathing is ragged and your legs shake as your second orgasm fades away. Even through your foggy mind you realize Reiner hasn’t cum yet, so you start moving back against him.

“You feel so good! I want you to cum inside me!” You tell him boldly.

His eyes widen in surprise but you feel his cock jerk inside of you. “Are you sure?”

“Yes, gods yes!” You cry out.

He smiles and chuckles at your enthusiasm. If only you knew how happy he is that you want him to.

Reiner stills and grabs onto your legs, making you yelp as he unwinds them from his waist and instead pushes them closer to your chest. When he sinks back into you in this position, he feels unbelievable deep inside you.

You scream his name as rams his cock in and out of you hard. Clearly you telling him to cum inside spurred him on.

His face is closer to yours now and you can hear every groan and ragged breath that leaves his mouth, causing your cunt clench around him.

Reiner’s pace becomes erratic as he approaches his orgasm. He presses your legs down further unconsciously, but you don’t mind at all as his cock is the only thing you are focusing on.

With a sharp finally thrust, he grunts your name and empties himself inside you. He kisses you as his hot cum fills you, his tongue quickly finding yours. You continue making out till his cock stops twitching, completely spend.

He gives you gentle kisses after he’s done filling you up. You giggle at him and return his affections by planting a kiss on his nose. Seemingly satisfied and assured that you are happy and okay, Reiner frees himself from your arms.

He seems hesitant to pull out, and when he does he watches his cum drip out of you. The sight almost gets him hard again, but he knows you need rest.

You scoot over to the edge of the bed so he can lay down, nestling yourself on top of his chest and against his side after he does so.

His fingers run through your hair, and as you lay basking in the after glow, you wonder if you should tell him again how you feel. When you look up at him though, you know it isn’t needed. He looks at peace, fully happy and relaxed for once. And those hazel eyes of his which you love so dearly, finally shine again.

#reiner braun #reiner #reiner x reader #smut #aot #snk #lemon #Reiner smut #aot smut #snk smut #Reiner x reader smut #fanfic #imagines #attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #x reader #fluff

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dwlrmoon · 4 years ago

Text

Astrological Analysis: I.M "Duality"

An astrological analysis of I.M's solo album "Duality" & how his astrological placements manifest through the songs. Changkyun said that he poured his entire soul into this album, so I thought it'll be really cool to dissect the songs in the astrological lens because I'm in love with his artistry.

REMINDER

Observed & analyzed through western tropical astrology; we are missing information due to lack of confirmed birth time, so I can only deliver using the traditional 7 planets (mainly the personal chart) without a house system.

DUALITY

Having the album entitled "Duality" with songs expressing this topic (esp. the title track) reminds me of his Aquarius placements, mainly the Sun. I.M has his Sun in detriment, meaning that his Sun is "weak" or uncomfortable in that sign. As the sister sign of Leo, Aquarius symbolizes celebrities, fame, the star in tarot, as well as hopes & dreams. Aquarius can represent notoriety & infamy while simultaneously having the stereotype of the loner or outsider, not wanting to be perceived or "understood."

Using traditional rulership, Aquarius is ruled by Saturn who also rules Capricorn. If Capricorn rules authorities & conformities, Aquarius is the rebellious younger sibling refusing to conform & rather revolt, deviating from the norm. I.M placed his artistry in precedence; convincing SSE to use God Damn as the title track despite the profanity requiring him to release this album digitally in addition to him creating the tracks in his own style that may or may not be in line with k-pop or Monsta X.

GOD DAMN

In true I.M fashion the song & MV are very concupiscent, & since I already talked about the duality that is expressed through this song, let's talk about the MV specifically. Pisces rules escapism & addiction & his Pisces Venus was very on brand to go with alcohol as the imagery of getting high to hide from his frustrations. This piece is highly self-reflective & he encourages listeners to read between the lines, it's quite Saturnian in nature. I also love how the lyrics have that duality of hating & loving whoever/whatever that is ruining/comforting him—I really associate this with his Martian Moon (him assigning Misbehave as the song that represents him is so... Aries Moon).

HOWLIN'

No more taming 'bout my color I swing 'till I get, what’s the problem? Problem I ain't follow simply what I see I go follow what I need 'Cause I see that I'm loyal Imma go on my speed, even I'm slow

The 1st verse reminds me a lot of his Saturnian + Martian energy—no more wanting to be someone he's not, doing his own thing without care of what others may think. However, the last 2 lines really highlight the fixed modality of his Aquarius: I love that he says he's loyal even if he goes on his speed which can be slow; he doesn't care as long as he gets there.

I don't celebrate 'till I make it till the end Ain't time for the 'hol up' You want me be a shade but I'm made for a big wave Ain't time for the 'hol up'

This song has a lot of Saturnian themes esp. the chorus. It reminds us that Saturn rules time—he doesn't succumb to the challenges & distractions or "hold ups," rather focusing on his goal & only celebrating once he reaches the mountaintop. Saturn is karmic, it takes its sweet time to give you your rewards that you must work laboriously for. He knows he's made for something bigger (Aquarius), & with his perseverance (fixed), determination & passion (Aquarius Mars + Aries Moon), he will be rewarded despite all the struggles (Saturn).

Don't call me, I'm drivin' I just wanna keep on ballin’ Even though when you are hatin’ Woah Grab me when I'm fallin’ 'Cause I make myself so lonely You know that I'm howlin'

However, Saturn can be extremely isolating & Aquarius is akin to the underdog. Of course we don't know where his placements are, but his Pisces Venus contributes to that isolation. He feels lonely & he knows that, but he inevitable makes himself lonely which Aquarius natives can do when they develop that mentality of me v.s. the world sometimes. Keep in mind that Aquarius rules community yet the outsider, showcasing that wanting to be alone while wanting someone to be there for him. Saturn is burden & he's a lone wolf used to being alone carrying all that burden himself.

BURN

The night has become cold and now it's a meaningless fight I don't wanna waste my time on the past time Endless shot, let me head to the top I don't wanna waste my time on the past time Burn the accumulated emotions, burn Burn everything without leaving anything, burn

An Aries Moon anthem? I find that Aries placements love having fire/burning imagery if not in their songs then in their MVs. Aries is Martian, cardinal & fire by nature, which means that Aries Moons may get irritated fairly quickly—a quick temper? But they get over it super quickly, kind of like blowing off steam & then letting it go right after. The Moon rules our emotions, & I think the lyrics speak for itself here. The allusion to the fight is very Martian as well.

I'm mixed and complex, yeah I don't know myself well, eh Yesterday I couldn't empty it out, yeah I'd rather burn it, yeah The tears that fell are oil Make the flame burn higher Pour it out, no more regrets Burn it all up and high, yeah

I really enjoy I.M's introspective & intrapersonal nature; he always says he doesn't know himself well & accepts that rather than fighting it. He accepts all facets of himself, & that's very refreshing. The 2nd verse made me chuckle a little bit because the first 2 lines look Aquarius while the rest is Aries. Not to mention he has an Aquarius Mars conjunct Sun, so, more Martian energy there. Cardinal + Martian give me that attitude he portrays very well in this song—throw some more oil, let it burn more so that there'll be no regrets. Another Aries placement who wrote something like this? Yoongi.

HAPPY TO DIE

I could die right now, yeah I can never lie, yeah You bring me to sky Let me be yours till I die When you say goodbye, yeah Bury me on your heart, yeah Don't you say that word Could you keep it till I die? You brought me back to the real love I wanna get lost here forever

There is so much to unpack in this little song... The chorus is a mixture of Saturnian commitment & Aries headstrong, passionate reckless energy motivated by his romanticist Pisces Venus. The title itself, the whole concept of this song, is fundamentally Pisces (his DSC would be really cool to talk about here, if we had the birth time, but we don't, so).

We're childish like we were when we used to play back then I let go of rationality as if I'm drawn by the wind I don't know what this feeling is Even if I try to pretend I don't know, everything seems to be obvious, yeah I don't know, I like it the way it is I don't know me well, I don't know I guess it's not a lie that I really like you I'm happy to die right now

Verse 1 truly has my heart in a grip. He has a rational & intellectually-minded Saturnian Mercury & Sun, yet once he's in love he gets enamoured & childish, rendered completely irrational. It's giving me Aries meets Pisces—of the moment, idealistic, just overwhelming emotions taking control of his Saturnian mind, which I find funny because he has Moon square Mercury.

Things of mine might go away and shape Will just change, but don't you change When I'm low, could you make me not alone? I could die right now if we were just this crazy about each other

Pisces is sentimental & can represent past lives, that feeling of being stuck in the past? Pisces Venus is visionary & idealistic, they're more in love with the idea of love than love itself sometimes. Here we see that theme of isolation again, his Aquarius could play a role here, but his Pisces placements are also desperate to be loved. The last line, like said before, is utterly Pisces because Romeo & Juliet is known to be a Pisces type of relationship, plus with that Aries Moon... it just makes sense since Aries Moons love the rush & passion.

시든 꽃 FLOWER-ED

Somehow I have no strength to resist I stay right where I am It's not like I'm longing for someone But I'm standing there

Personally loving how his songs gradually grow more & more Piscean? The overwhelming emotion of yearning with no one to long for is so Pisces/Jupiterian Venus in general. Like I said, they're idealistic & in love with the idea of love more than anything—not the happy kind of love either. I notice that Jupiterian Venuses play with the theme of wanting a lot, mainly because they are ruled by the planet of expansion. Distance is a huge theme in Jupiterian signs, & they idealize that.

When you step on me like it's nothing I desperately want you to come back and hug mе I deeply remember your smilе that laughed at me While I was being illuminated by you

Because Pisces placements love the idea of love & the feeling of longing for someone they can get into the habit of sacrificing themselves, hence their association with the hanged man in tarot. They are too focused on the fantasy of love to take off their rose tinted glasses.

I don't really blame you I know your days by my side Have faded away Please don't disappear, oh

The hand that held me, the eyes that captured me are all blind The scattered hands, the shining eyes are gone

I don't know what else to say here, like, I think you guys understand how these verses really depicts his Pisces Venus very well... With a Venus conjunct Saturn it can really emphasize isolation & rejection as well—this aspect feels like they are deprived of love, so they crave it desperately even if it hurts them which is a theme of Pisces. Him titling this track "withered flower" in Korean is so Pisces Venus of him overall.

#i.m #changkyun #im changkyun #monsta x #kpop astrology #monsta x astrology #changkyun scenarios #monsta x scenarios

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aineryeo · 4 years ago

Text

Prominence ௹ ATSUMU

The letters of the first few days when you parted ways 📨

Prominence: “Find someone great, but don’t find someone better.” You’d say to yourself, though it was directed to your ex-boyfriend, writing in a number of papers, serving as letters. Awaiting your impending doom.

Timeskip! Atsumu x Reader

Synopsis: You break up with Atsumu Miya in hopes to alleviate his pain. And for what he'd have to deal with. » 6.2k Words

Warnings: Depictions of Mental Illnesses & actual disease, Angst, Suicidal tendencies, Cursing, Atsumu is an impulsive bitch, so is reader. Read at your own discretion. Do not read if this has any sort of possibility to trigger you, more if you feel encouraged to do something you shouldn’t. This isn’t what the fic is about.

It was a rainy day, droplets of water knocking on the window of what was your empty room. It wasn’t a space you were supposed to be getting used to at this point in your long life. A faint tune of a piano was penetrating through your thin walls as you stared into nothing in particular, maybe the particles that become visible with the peek of sunlight through the gray clouds piercing through your window pane.

Your body got up, but you had a stinging migraine, your limbs were weak, and today was an off-day from your work as a bustling city journalist. No phone calls for a sudden need for your presence in your job. Your blanket was wrapped around you loosely, your feet navigating through your creaking floors. How depressing.

Empty fridge.

Messy bed.

Disorganized papers.

And clothes in unsuspecting places.

Your clothes. None of his. You can’t even reminisce about him anymore. Your migraine seems to have gotten worse. You spot one of the few things that were left organized. Your letters. You grimaced, the pain suddenly pushed to the back of your head as you were reminded of the contents.

“It won’t be bad to see him, at least once.” You reason to yourself with a small smile, it wasn’t a happy one. Nonetheless it was one. One reason out of many when you were always reminded that he was already happy, that Atsumu no longer needed you, and your relationship was a ghost of the past.

It has been for a month now, how else would it go, when you were the one who ended it?

Yeah, it was a bad idea to see him. You scold yourself for coming here, furthering your torture. You see him with a huge smile, bigger than when he was with you. Brighter than when you last picked a joke, at least that was what you thought. You dated him since you were sixteen, young, and fresh in-love.

“Tsum, baby, not here.” You vaguely make out, from hiding behind one of the tall bleachers near the exit from where their practice usually resided in. She was very pretty, her voice silky. You hear a rumbling chuckle in return, you feel your spine shudder at the familiarity. “Hm, honey where do ya want me ta do it then? I jus’ can’t resist ya.” You took your small window to catch a glimpse of them. The perfect lovers.

This was selfish, you knew it. But you inwardly cheered for him, happy to know that he found someone great. That he was happy, even if it was at your expense. Your eyes were glossy, dams about to break, so you walk away; like you always do, like you always did. Your mouth formed into a shaky frown, your fists clenching ‘till you were white-knuckling nothing in particular. White-knuckling all your pain, perhaps.

It was when you exited the establishment, into the car park, into your cheap second-hand car, did your tears fall; until everything kept breaking, your multi-functional tape to bar all your emotions inside, failing you for the umpteenth time for the past month. You were all alone, still clutching your keys to open the door to the driver’s seat. When you felt a hand on your shoulder, which made you jolt, you were too surprised that you didn’t get to wipe your residual breakdown off your face.

“Hey, are you okay?”

Your blurry eyes adjusted, and your heart almost jumped at the familiar face. You turned your face away from him, you were too ashamed to show your face to him. To the brother of the man you were still in love with. You changed your voice a few octaves higher, “Yeah! Thanks, sorry you had to see that.” Mishandling your keys before being able to open it quickly, though Osamu stopped you just as fast.

“I know it’s you, Y/N.”

You froze. “I’m not—”

Hearing a small laugh from him made you stop. “I think I’ve seen your car enough times before, with the same plate to know that it’s you when I parked right next to it.” Turning back, he already had his hand out holding a handkerchief.

“Sorry.”

He smiled sympathetically at your small figure, noticing that you’ve gotten smaller than you already were. More fragile. So he placed his hand that was roughly the size of your face, gently on top of your head to stroke it, hoping to bring you some comfort; roughly knowing the situation about you and his brother. How couldn’t he?

“It’ll be okay.”

It’s not. You recall, already sitting in your bathtub, not really crying, not really feeling anything of the sort. You exhaled as if it lightened your burdens. It won’t be.

You hum. Knees to your chest, “Not when...” You sigh, not now.

It was time for work, tedious work that requires you to write articles and camp out places at 2am in the morning, only to turn up and camp out at a different place again, just hoping for an interview for your channel. You didn’t feel like breaking down at all, but it felt like everything is typically more down. You refused to eat when your co-workers asked you to join them, you had no appetite.

You hadn’t for weeks.

A heavy feeling is always stuck inside you. Like everything is screaming at you, but you can’t scream back. You just can’t. Always heaving sighs, always staring into what once was blue skies, turned dull grey. Was it because you regretted having to let go of him? Or was it because of the news you had received prior to when you left him? Was it because the one time you felt like you couldn’t walk, the doctor told you that you had a few left; extend your life with a surgery that was high-risk.

Your hand ran through your hair for the umpteenth time, thoughts drifting to whether you should just end it quicker than what you had. What was the point? You failed to notice that your hand was writing on another piece of paper, as if documenting everything that ran through your mind. And maybe you wanted them to find out, when you’re gone. So you don’t have to face the burden of facing them afterwards and giving them any answers.

But you don’t want to ruin the happiness Atsumu had right now. He’ll blame himself, but this was all your fault. You ended it with a bad note so he’d forget you easily, you yelled at him, told him that he was useless, you didn’t love him anymore. You open your eyes, seeing yourself back at the situation where it all began, and where it all ended.

“Atsumu, I hate you.”

“Angel, what are ya saying? I said I was sorry! I’m tired from practice.” He replied, he was tired. He was stressed. You were stressing him. And he was getting rightfully agitated, it was working.

Your thoughts briefly flash to the days before, same old. You chose to do it days slowly, so it wouldn’t be too sudden; so he’d lose all love for you once you leave him. So you nitpick him again, even though it never really bothered you, “You always do this. Maybe we should just...” You swallow, it was like eating hard, bitter candy at once.

“What? Break up? Yeah, with your incessant yappin’ these days, Y/N, I wouldn’t mind one bit.” He said, looking at you with a harsh gaze. Similar to when some random fan begins screaming during his serving routine. You were nothing now. You nodded, if he had the right mind that time, he would’ve noticed that you were eerily calm; you were expecting this, why wouldn’t you?

“Yeah, break up.” You confirmed, with a somber smile. He hadn’t even noticed that more than half of your things were already gone from your shared apartment. You had one last suitcase, it was right beside the door. Atsumu failed to notice all the little things disappearing, so it wouldn’t be a surprise if he failed to also stop you before you hung your apron on the rack, turning the stove off, he was already gone. Into his bedroom, where he slept, too tired for anything his aching muscles couldn’t take right now. Your keys left untouched on the table before you left him altogether. Always, just always looking back with a heavy grimace.

The skies were the same color from that day, to everyday, same grey.

It wasn’t long before you found out he had a new love. Apparently an avid, and innocent fan of his whom he met during one of his morning runs in the park.

“What’re you writing there, Y/N?” One of your co-workers as of now, Akaashi Keiji, brought your head back up in the present. You hummed, folding the paper your hand subconsciously wrote in, and placing it in your pocket. “Nothing, really. My hand just kind of moves on its own when I think of anything in general.”

He smiles, sweet. “That’s endearing. Must be why you’re quite famous in the department.”

You chuckle, “I’m not famous, Keiji. If anything, this job just keeps giving me migraines. You’re the real MVP as a great editor in your dept.”

His hand was rubbing his nape, laughing softly with you. You stood up, supposed to get some water only to fall back down again. Your co-worker quickly catches you with worry etched in his delicate features.

“Y/N, have you been eating?” No, but..

“Keiji, I can’t feel my legs.”

It was showing.

You asked Keiji not to tell anyone, he in turn, asked if any of your family members knew this. It made you chortle, you said, “No. My grandmother died years ago, I’m an only child, and my parents didn’t last.” It wasn’t a funny thing, you knew that but it made you laugh anyway. Laugh at how pathetic you were.

He looked at you, on your bed at your home that he had kindly helped you in after calling your doctor from before. Saying it was that the disease was starting to become severe, causing your limbs, your legs, your arms, to lose its sensation. Slowly, you’ll become more agitated, and it’ll be harder for you to talk, or even move. Only your co-worker, and your boss knew for the time-being.

“You don’t have to help me. I know you’re busy.” You said, though weak, “I’ll only weigh you down.”

Keiji sighed, he knew that you worry too much about other people, he knew that you got lost enough to stop thinking about yourself. And it was sad, he empathized with you in the way that you were both overthinkers, though he’d understood for a while that you were more hasty with decision-making.

“No.” He said, simple.

You looked down at the blanket that covered your bottom half, your top half facing the big, musty, old window next to your bed. Facing away from Akaashi.

“Why?”

He was quiet for a few seconds, save for the usual noise from the surrounding roads. He looked up, before he looked back at your weak figure. “It’s just you—you’re all alone.” Walking around to the other side so he can face you. About to utter a tad more to his sentence, he stopped when he saw your eyes blown wide, a bit red at the bottom, a hard attempt to stop tears from falling. He didn’t miss a beat after, quickly crouching, and allowing your head to rest on his chest.

“So I thought you could use some company.”

You appreciated your co-worker, now close friend’s generous help. It’s been a few weeks, and you’ve been spending it cooped up in the hospital. He had also forced you to finally admit yourself so you can get immediate assistance in the case that something similar were to happen again. A similar event where he was forced to carry you to your car, and drive you home.

The cords stuck to your skin to hydrate you was a bother, but it was manageable. Here were your last few months alive. You still had no idea why you couldn’t just leave. You had no specific goal, you were bound to hit rock-bottom, and the least you can get is a few more months, maybe years of living if you get the surgery. There was no point, nothing to live for. You could work on your career, but what can you really do with legs that can barely stand, and… hands that can’t even pick up a pen.

The latter was the one that you cried to every night if you had tears to spare. The latter was the one where you try to continuously hit your head in hopes it can keep writing. It was such a simple task, why couldn’t it do its job? When Akaashi came to visit one afternoon, he had to rush and grab the sharp pen you had in your barely moving left hand, attempting to dig it in the skin of the right. Just to feel if it was still alive.

Then it was requested to have no pens, or sharp objects left near you without supervision. You’d call your friends, if by friends, you mean other than occasional visits from your co-workers that didn’t know much about your personal life; but still had the courtesy of visiting you nonetheless after hearing news from the boss, you’d consent to it since you were leaving the field. But he hasn’t fired you yet, apparently.

Sometimes it shifts, when your arms refuse to work, your legs will move for a bit, vice versa. A frown forms on your face when it happens to be both. Why couldn’t this just be quicker? You ponder, and hear the door open. Expecting the only person who visits you so frequently.

“Keij—” You stopped. He stopped. “What are you doing here?”

“Hm? So I can’t visit ya now?” Oh, his familiar tone.

“How did you even know I was here?” You said, a bit agitated.

“Asked one of yer co-workers.” He shrugged.

“...You visited my workplace? And they told you immediately?” You raised your brow, bringing your body up to sit on the bed instead. It was a feat on its own, but he’d seen your struggle, he was about to reach and help actually.

“Yeah, I had deliveries to make.” He said, leaning back. “And I may have made them slip it after overhearin’ yer name. Couldn’t resist my charm.”

“You’re ridiculous, ‘Samu.” You smiled, for the first time in a while. He could tell that it wasn’t a normal occurrence in a while, the thought of at least alleviating your stress for a bit eased a tide inside Osamu.

Osamu took his hat off, putting it on the table next to your bed. He was humoring you, because he didn’t want you to see the first look on his face when he confirmed that it really was you who's been confined here. Not any other person with the same name. He sat on the sofa beside you, next to the window. You’d lie if your heart didn’t clench at the sight of him, If you’d look inside, you’ll spot the tinge of pain; but outside, all Osamu could see was that you still adored him. By that, he meant his brother. He knew he might trigger you due to him being the twin of what was your love. Still is, he was sure.

Clearing his throat, your trance broke. “Y/N.”

“Hm.” You lay your back flat on the metal headboard covered in the white pillows of your white bed, in your white room.

“Why are you here?” It was true that Osamu had heard you were confined in the hospital while he was making deliveries to your place coincidentally, so he couldn’t help but perk his ears. Despite your break-up, he was still your childhood friend, and although he heard of the story of how it ended from none other than his brother’s dull voice on the phone that night he was closing up Onigiri Miya; he knew there must’ve been something that caused you to do that other than Atsumu himself. He’d investigate, and help rekindle the lifelong relationship you both shared if he wasn’t so busy himself. And if his brother hadn’t immediately used a rebound to inflict immediate pain upon you, maybe he’d have considered it.

“I don’t know.” You shrugged.

Osamu sighs, “You do. Tell me,” he looks at you with sincerity, placing his coarse palm from the work he’s been juggling in, on top of your pale, lifeless hands. Almost wincing at the cold temperature they held, “Please.”

You sucked in a breath, he placed his, what you assume to be, warm hand on top of yours. But you felt nothing. So you let it out, “I have Friedreich’s Ataxia. Apparently it’s genetic, uh, doesn’t allow me to use these flimsy things.” You glanced at your legs, slightly waving them along with your hands, “I can’t even feel the warmth of your hand right now. I mean, that is, if you’re warm. It’s always cold here. The doctors said they’d try to give me therapy and train me to walk again, or actually use my hands.” You chuckle.

“And something about heart surgery, though that won’t really extend my life for long.” You finish, opting to insert a joke that you thought was bright until you let it out, “Better than turning out blind though! Haha… Kidding, it may happen to me too, which sucks, by the way.”

Your rambling was cut off when you were met with an intense stare from Osamu. “And you’ve found out of this, when?”

“...Nearly 2 months.. Ago?” You gulped the lump that was stuck in your throat.

Osamu rested his elbows on his knees, thinking. “So that was the reason?”

You retained silence.

He sighs. “I knew it would be a valid reason, but I really wasn’t hoping it would be this.” His face hidden in his big hands, frustration was visible. But it was the breathy question of, “Why are the gods this cruel?” To which your eyes soften, albeit a little bit.

“Samu, can I ask a favor?”

He looks at you, face out of his palms. “Sure.”

“Can you… Turn the TV on?” He raised a brow at first before standing up and getting the remote by the stand, switching it on, immediately being greeted by the sports channel on Volleyball. Oh, they had a game today. He had nearly forgotten due to this new revelation from you. He looked at your face that was staring directly at the screen, then he saw the number thirteen, and his heart clenched tighter.

He placed the remote on the table beside your bed, and he took his black cap. He spun it on his finger for a bit, “I won’t tell ‘Sumu.”

You hummed again, before looking at him. “Thank you.” Then he smiles sweetly at you before turning around, his face immediately turning into a painful grimace. Because even he could feel the tragedy of this love.

Each day you were gone was a punch in the gut for Atsumu. His initial lack of reaction to his overreaction, trying to get back at you for leaving him. It was wrong. All he ever wanted was to call you, tell you to come back, have you in his arms, the lot. He’d miss the smell of your hair when he hugs you tight, or the clean apartment whenever he comes home to you beaming, cooking dinner; like his precious wife-to-be. Though he hadn’t proposed, the ring he bought for you started collecting dust in his drawer.

The girl he was with didn’t really last long, she broke it off after getting annoyed by him calling your name instead of hers on any normal occasion on impulse. His head in his hands, bed half-empty. His games gave him a little bit of adrenaline, but every time he sees the empty spot saved for you in his jersey, the adrenaline will scafe off, bit by bit. It’d be a lie if he said that he didn’t at least try to call your number in the past two months, he had actually, for a couple of times. But your number was unreachable, and your social media was non-existent.

It was like you weren’t real. Like a ghost. Sand that was slipping far from his fingers, his hold. His hold loosened in a moment of weakness.

To say his biggest regret was the night you left was a lie, because the biggest regret he ever made was never immediately trying to get you back. He was dazed off in the locker rooms after one of their games, his water bottle in hand. Hinata waved in front of him, Bokuto right next; to which his daze cut off.

“You okay, Tsum?”

He smiled, nodding. But his teammates knew it wasn’t the same for a while now. He was more rigid and tired in his movements. Probably not the kind of exhaustion that could be solved by sleep.

“Yeah, no worries.” Even Sakusa worriedly glances once in a while, he still cares, though not openly shown. Atsumu slung his gym bag over his shoulders after changing, he decided to visit his brother in his shop for now. He was walking out to drive when he accidentally bumped into someone, trapped in his little thoughts about you again.

“Oh—Sorry, didn’t see ya there.” Atsumu apologized, knowing it was his fault.

“It’s okay, Miya-san.” It took a few moments before Atsumu registered who this was.

“Akaashi? Keiji? Bokuto talks about ya all the time! Nice to meet ya.” He smiled, putting his hand out for him to shake. To which the latter man does. Oh, Akaashi recognizes him, not just from being his friend’s teammate; but from being your ex. He concluded in his thoughts by the few seconds they shook hands that he wished for him to not find out about you any longer. Thinking about the pain it would cause for both of you, especially him. They nodded at each other before bidding goodbyes and heading off to their own destinations.

Atsumu drove past the busy streets of the city, traffic holding him back a little bit. He was stopped a little bit in front of the city hospital. He didn’t know why, but his gaze lingered on the building a little longer than he’d like to admit. His left hand clutching the wheel, the other on the stick; Why does it feel like… He shakes his head to rid himself of ridiculous thoughts, seeing as the cars were finally moving, he did too.

Just as his foot pressed on the accelerator, his eyes landed on you. His eyes were the widest it had been, and this was the day he felt the most emotions since the day you left him.

“Y/N?” He asks, though his window was turned up and he was inside his car. He must be going crazy. Were you on a wheelchair? Was it really you? Or were his eyes playing tricks on him again, just like it had been every time he visited places he used to go with you. Or when he needed anything in particular, his first call in the apartment would be your name, expecting an answer back like you always had been.

He rolls his window down, and at that moment he swears your eyes met before you quickly changed vision. He’d run out of his car to chase you right now, if it weren’t for the honking behind him. Fuck.

He drives forward, and goes around to park for the hospital real quickly. Just to see if he wasn’t going insane by the amount of times he’d imagined seeing you again. He looks around the area, arriving at the greener part of the hospital, probably one of the places where they take some patients out for walks. Atsumu’s heart beats faster when he sees the same beautifully familiar hair, and angelic face he’s fallen in love with. He misses a beat, he stops, just plainly admiring; he notices your weaker stature, and your crest-fallen face. Paler skin, and limp limbs. And for that mistake, he fails to notice you were being guided in already.

He panics. About to bolt when he suddenly trips over his feet, and gets a bloody knee as the door closes. That doesn’t stop Atsumu, no, he’s dealt with much worse; one of which was the pain of not having you in his life. So he runs, and he sees the wheelchair you resided in enter the elevator; and once again, he swears, he swears, that his breath catches in his throat as he sees your eyes, and you see his.

And maybe he didn’t know, and maybe you didn’t know, but for the first time in months, you both saw colors.

“She was there, ‘Samu, I was sure of it!” Atsumu yells even in the midday of the bustling Onigiri Miya.

“Yer delusional as always, ‘Sumu. Ya should get yer head checked.” Osamu says from the kitchen in the back, there was faint squealing from the men and women alike in the restaurant. Feeling blessed for being able to witness the Miya twins in one sitting. And bantering, no less; even if it was over a girl.

“I can’t have mistaken it. I know when I see ma’ girl, Samu. Ya know it.” Atsumu groans, burying his head in his arms on the counter. “But when I asked the nurses, none of ‘em are giving me details. They say there ain’t Y/N L/N on their recent list of confined patients.”

Osamu was lucky he was working the kitchen right now, because he was low-key nervous of what to say, to not compromise you. How was his brother so close to it anyway? He wants to drive him away. He thinks he can agree with your rationale, but when he thinks of his brother’s side, wouldn’t it be more painful to just find out that you were just… Gone? His mind was splitting in half because of this dreaded situation, until Atsumu called him out again.

“Hey, ya scrub! Are ya even listening to me?” Atsumu lightheartedly yelled as Osamu’s heart softened. If anything, he didn’t want to see his brother bear the pain of losing you, permanently.

“Yeah, yeah. Shut yer trap. I have a business running here. Yer scaring off the customers.” Osamu says, getting out of the kitchen, arms crossed with a scowl.

“Help me, Samu. I just… Can’t bear to lose her.” Atsumu finally says, with a lace of evident longing. Osamu’s face contorts into a myriad of reactions that he couldn’t pick from. Before he settled with a sigh, and a lean on his forearms to poke his brother roughly on the forehead. A grunt of pain from the blonde.

“The only one who can help ya is yerself. If ya want to go find her, go ahead. Whatever your choice will be, don’t let it end with regret.” Was all he said before he went away to tend to the girls who were about to order, red-faced, and all.

Atsumu didn’t understand it a bit. How was that supposed to help him? He thinks. His fist digging into his cheek, face contorted into heavy thinking. It went on like that. He had no other clue, but he kept visiting the hospital, kept driving through, hoping he could catch a glimpse of you; to prove to himself that you were real. But for the first few days, he had no sign of you whatsoever. He kept bugging the nurses, or at least asking them everyday and ended up getting rejected again, and again, and again.

He sat in his car parked in the hospital on his free-day. As if a lightbulb turned on, he felt stupid for not visiting your workplace. They should at least know something about you, right? You were pretty well-known, and idolized in the industry. So he drove there, he may or may not have sped up a little more than he should but all in good purpose. He arrived there, and immediately knew where to park, the signature spot for everytime he comes to drive you home. Recently hearing that you bought a car when you broke up with him, made him sink a little bit. But he saw the spot was taken, eyebrows furrowing for a little before parking to the spot next to it.

When he got out, he noticed that the car that took your spot had dusting on it. As if it hadn’t been let out in a while. Or used. Quickly putting two-and-two together, maybe this was your car? The one you had bought? And if it hadn’t been used in a while… Then that supports his thoughts about you being in the hospital. His face shifted into worry. That must mean.. Whatever you had been sick of, was serious if you haven’t been using your car as often, considering your job was hectic.

He shook the thoughts off for a while, determined to find more clues about you instead. But he thinks the search suddenly became too easy when he suddenly heard a few gossiping women.

“Oh, poor Ms. L/N… She’s been hospitalized for a month now.”

“Really? Have you heard of any reason why?”

“I’m still unsure but I heard it’s chronic, and she doesn’t really have long.”

He sucks in a harsh breath. What? His ears perk up more to their conversation. He hides behind a wall, he assumes that they’re probably heading for their lunch break as a group right now.

Then a snicker, “I know this is kind of mean, but who’ll be replacing her now? Surely her position is up for debate.”

Atsumu’s face darkens at this. Stepping out of the wall as his big frame became all the more intimidating, “I mean, she’ll be biting the dust sooner or—”

“Shut your damn mouth, filthy whore.” Atsumu says with a sneer. Chin up, looking down. “Continue that sentence and I’ll see who bites the fuckin’ dust first.” A whimper, “It’s him again!” Shuffled feet, then they’re gone and out of his sights.

It takes a sigh, and a slump in his posture before everything sinks in. What does this mean? Is it.. True?

He shook his head, sure, you weren’t looking so good when he last saw you. You looked especially sick. But it was like nobody, not even the universe, had wanted him to see you. He thought back to the gossiping workers earlier. It’s him again? Atsumu hasn’t visited in a while, and he doesn’t think that he’s seen them… Oh.

Fuck, Osamu.

He could pass off as a professional racer with the speed he was driving at, only lucky enough to not have any cops tailing him. He was breathing heavily, his brother knew about you and didn’t tell him anything apart from that vague statement a few days ago? He couldn’t help the light betrayal he felt but in all honesty, he’d much rather force his brother to take him to you now. So when he arrived in Onigiri Miya, he didn’t waste a second dragging his brother out who was grumbling incessantly.

“The fuck ‘Sumu, I have a business to run!”

“No you, The fuck ‘Samu. You knew where Y/N was? Take me to her, now.” Atsumu said, foot on the ground, he won’t let anything come between his decisions now. Taking the bag of Onigiri from Osamu’s hand, “I’ll take this too. I’ll pay for it, I need to give a treat at least but we’re kind of in a hurry.” Osamu sighed, finally getting the gist of the situation. Deciding to spare his brother, he’d have to apologize to you later for spilling the beans. But he thinks he needs to let his brother let his feelings out as well.

“Okay.”

“No, you don’t have any other cho—Okay. Okay, get in the car.”

Osamu briefly yells at the part-timer he recently hired, telling them to take over for a while. To which they nodded eagerly, and so, the brothers left. Save for the quiet ride for the first few minutes. “...How—” Atsumu clears his throat, “How is she?”

A quiet beat, Osamu thinks of his answer. He settles for a passive one, “Okay.”

“Hn.” Atsumu grunts.

Osamu leans back on the passenger seat, “Just… Just make sure you don’t regret any of this.”

Atsumu raises a thick brow at this, “Why would I?”

“I think you already know why.”

He sucks in a harsh breath at this, and the silence remains. Atsumu reaches the hospital, parks the car, and Osamu leads the way to your room. Every step Atsumu took felt like the ground was shaking and trying to eat him whole. He wanted to see your pretty face again, your smile that could make his day whole and puff his chest out, or your hands that would comb through his hair and ask how it’s so soft when he bleaches it regularly.

So why was he seeing your writhing body under nurses yelling your name this time. Osamu breathes in, slowly understanding the situation as he quickly glances at his brother who was frozen. Both of them kept walking, until they were in front of what was supposed to be your room. Door open, and multiple people, trying to keep you alive. He hears that the doctor is coming, that you should wait, that you’ll get better in no time, at this point Atsumu didn’t know if the reassurances were for him instead.

When he sees your weak hand gripping the railing of your bed, he breaks. The bag of Onigiri long forgotten on the floor as he runs towards your bed.

“Darling, hey, hey, Angel, you—Yer okay, yeah? You’ll be fine, please be okay.” Atsumu says with shaky hands gripping yours, it was intensely cold, as if you weren’t even alive in the first place. He wishes so much that he was the one to give you warmth. “Look at me, you’ll be okay.”

And for the second time in a while, your eyes meet his, your weak, fragile, pretty little eyes; finally meeting him. The nurses noticed you calming down more, but your state wasn’t getting any better. They were initially going to let Atsumu out, but noticing the intimate relationship you two seemed to have displayed, they decided against it. More focused on bringing you back to life.

You had the heart surgery. You took the leap to extend your life, ever since you caught a glimpse of him a few days back; you just knew that the biggest regret you’d ever have is to never try. You told Akaashi when he visited that you were deciding on it, and he was supportive. He was really supportive. But you weren’t blind that it was a risk that may also shorten your life instead. Though wasn’t that what you were asking for, this whole time?

So maybe the time you got out of the surgery unscathed was the calm before the storm, it was the calm before this. But you were glad that even through your hazy vision, it was him that showed. It was Atsumu that kept telling you to look into his pretty eyes, and tell you that you’ll be okay.

Atsumu thinks that even in this situation, you were the most beautiful thing he’s ever laid his eyes on. So when the most beautiful thing slipped from his grasp, with no chance of clutching it back; his heart is torn, and burnt into crisps, non-existent flakes as his mind replays every memory he’s ever had with you, and how he was standing and watching warm, sunny spring turn into the ruthless, cold winter.

Osamu watched his brother break down in front of your bed, his own tears mixing in the lot, his cap covering most of his face. Another familiar figure that frequented visits with you, a solemn expression on his usual calm face. Heavy feeling on his chest, Akaashi approached the man who lay on his knees in front of your bed while the nurses that were scrambling to keep your life had promptly announced the date and time of your death.

Akaashi handed the box in his hand towards Atsumu who was kneeling with all his might, head on the ground, continuously asking for forgiveness from you, continuously asking for more time, just a little more. He hates this, he hates it. Because, when it sank in, you were gone.

The scene of your death. ⁆ To Visualize :) But instead of it being Kousei playing the piano, it's Atsumu when he plays volleyball, but when someone comes up to him, tapping on his back with a bright smile for an interview after the game; it's not you.

#Atsumu Miya #atsumu miya x reader #atsumu x you #atsumu x y/n #break up #haikyuu #haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader #timeskip atsumu #timeskip haikyuu #Akaashi Keiji #Atsumu angst #MSBY

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lilixloveswriting · 4 years ago

Text

Oasis

Summary: Late, wet from the rain, and with all her friends back home in Inaba, the reader's first day at Shujin Academy was far less than ideal. Prepared to eat her lunch alone, she'd soon realize she wouldn't after to after being approached by the school punk. Ryuji Sakamoto x F!Reader (she wears a skirt, but that's really the only gendery thing going on)

Word Count: 1386

TW: swearing, ryuji says fuck, sad reader, angst with a happy ending

A/N: I wrote this at 2 am as a distraction after crying over kpop yet again. This is incredibly self-indulgent, but hopefully someone else can read it for the same reason. Enjoy!

You dropped your bag and sat down beside it, opening up your lunchbox and unwrapping your sandwich, staring at it emptily before breaking down into tears. Today was your first day at Shujin and, well, things weren’t going great. You’d gotten lost on the way; couldn’t seem to find the damn gate for the connecting train. By the time you did, you knew you were definitely going to be late for class. People weren’t nearly as friendly in the city as they were in Inaba, and nobody seemed to want to stop and help you. The same could be said for the actual students at your school, except instead of completely ignoring you, they were quick to pass judgment, snickering as you walked into the classroom sopping wet from the sudden rain, which you had sworn wasn’t in the forecast.

Your homeroom teacher didn’t take nicely to you being late and gave you a stern scolding, muttering something about always being stuck with the delinquents before leaving for his lunch. So here you were: wet, cold, and hungry, sobbing over your quickly sogging sandwich as you sat alone in a patch of poorly grown grass promptly turning into a puddle of mud as your tears mixed with the rain. You thought about maybe calling your mom, but dismissed the idea realizing she’d only tell you to suck it up, and that the first day was always the worst. Encourage you to try and make some friends...yeah, right. Even if the other students did seem friendly, they all seemed like gossip junkies and would probably turn on you to spread a new exciting rumor given the chance. You’d rather be alone than befriend people like that.

Despite this, you weren’t fooling anyone as the thought only made you cry harder. The tears fell faster as you realized the days at Junes and the floodplain were over, they’d fade into distant memories as your friends back home carried on with their lives, soon forgetting all about you. You never understood the hype about the big city. Sure, there were more things to do, but what was the point if there was no one to share it with? It was the very definition of being alone in a crowded room.

“Oh, fuck.”

You stalled your crying with a gasp, snapping your head up and looking around. You listened intently for footsteps or a voice, but couldn’t distinguish anything between your sniffles and rain pattering on the foliage. “Hello?” You hiccuped, more embarrassing sobs leaving your throat as you grimaced at how pitiful you sounded. “Anyone...is anyone there?” You fumbled to your knees, setting your uneaten sandwich down in your bento before leaning out from behind the wall you’d picked to shelter yourself.

“Uh…” The voice came again, and just as you rounded the corner out stepped a sheepish looking boy, gritting his teeth as his hand rubbed at the back of his blond head. You recognized him from your class. His features were kind of hard to forget, plus, he’d been the only one who didn’t give you a dirty or snarky look when you burst through the door. “Yeah, sorry. I...didn’t know anybody was over here.” He slouched, sticking his hands in his pockets as he pursed his lips, avoiding eye contact with you. Not that you could blame him, you were a mess. “Umm, are...you okay?”

You snorted. Did you look okay? You didn’t have a good answer for his stupid question, so you ignored it, instead asking one of your own. “Am I in your way?”

“Ah...nahh.” He shook his head kicking at the ground. “It’s cool, I was just gonna do some...stuff.”

You scrunched up one side of your face, eyes drifting from his face to the grass outside of your hiding spot. If you were judging just based on his hair, his posture, and the way he’d phrased that last sentence, you wouldn’t be able to think it was anything but drugs. But that was probably how everyone at this school thought, and you were different from them.

“N-nothin shady or anythin!” He said, raising his voice and taking an assertive step forward.

Yeah, no, never mind. It was definitely drugs. “Okay, well, sorry. I’ll get out of your way.” You wiped your face with your sleeve, kneeling back down to pack up your bag.

“Uh, no! I mean, you can stay. Uh…” He toed the ground some more, a frown on face. “It didn’t look like you were done with your food, so.”

You shook your head and cleared your throat with a sniffle. “I’m not that hungry.”

He somehow managed to slouch more as he watched you zip up your bag. “So, you’re new, huh?” He asked and you faltered, glancing up at him and brushing the raindrops off of your forehead.

“How’d you tell?” You scoffed, your own joke only making you feel more embarrassed.

He shrugged and you laughed a bit, shaking your head. “Pack an umbrella in your bag,” He said. “It’s saved my ass about a million times.”

“Oh,” You blinked up at him and nodded. “Thanks for the tip.”

“Uh-huh.” He said, then bent over, bracing his palm on the ground and he lowered himself onto the wet grass. “So, why are you eatin in the rain? There are covered spots you can eat, ya know?”

“And let everyone witness my breakdown? No thanks.” You laughed beside yourself, hands resting on top of your backpack.

“Heh,” He smiled, “Well sorry, you probably won’t gain any popularity points talkin to me.” He said, placing both of his hands in the grass and leaning back, lifting his head to look at the sky.

“Why not?” You watched him a moment before following his gaze. “You seem nice enough.”

He shook his head. “I’m trouble, haven’t you heard?” He glanced at you. “Thought teach woulda toldja.”

“Hmph,” You snickered, “Well by his standards, I’m pretty sure I’m trouble too.” You told him and felt some of your anxiety melt away when succeeding to make him chuckle. “Um, I’m Y/N.” You introduced yourself quietly, still feeling a little shy, but this was the only person who had bothered to even offer up a conversation all day, and you were kind of starving for human interaction.

“Ryuji.” He said, and lifted his hand when he saw you’d outstretched yours, but faltered when it came off if the ground caked with grass and dirt. Ryuji apologized, rubbing away the muck carelessly onto his pants. “Eh, it’s not so bad here. I mean, it’s shit cuz it’s school, but it ain’t awful once you make some friends.”

You gazed at him and sighed, eyes rolling down to the floor. “Yeah…I’ve kinda been struggling with that part.”

The bell rang and Ryuji heaved a sigh, rolling his weight onto his left hand and pushing himself back to his feet. “Welp, if you don’t mind a few rumors, me and my friends are always lookin for more people!” He beamed, offering you a hand, which you gratefully took.

You brushed off your butt, sure your skirt was probably stained, but you didn’t care so much at this point. You needed to get out of these wet clothes anyway, you could probably just change into your gym uniform.

“Here you go.” You looked back up to see Ryuji shoving something at you eagerly, taking it into your hands to realize it was an umbrella.

“Oh, no.” You quickly shook your head, holding it back out for him to take, but of course he refused. “Please, I can’t take this-”

“Then just use it ‘till you get your own.” He said zipping his bag back up and readjusting it on his shoulder. “You’ll get sick if you don’t use one, and then how will you make friends?”

You snorted, breaking into the first true smile you’ve made since moving to Tokyo. “Thank you, Ryuji.”

“Uh-huh!” He nodded with a grin, then turned away and began walking back to the building. “You better hurry up, if you show up late to class with me you’ll be blacklisted.”

You giggled, jogging to catch up to your new friend. To you, being blacklisted with Ryuji definitely didn’t sound like the worst case scenario.

#persona 5 #persona 5 royal #ryuji sakamoto #p5 #ryuji x reader #persona 5 fanfiction #skull persona 5 #my writing #fanfiction #x reader #reader insert #persona 5 imagines #angst #persona 5 angst #hurt/comfort #fluff #angst and fluff #no beta we die like the persona 3 protagonist #lilixloveswriting

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phoenix-downer · 4 years ago

Text

White Day Surprise

2026 words. Contains spoilers for Melody of Memory. SoKai. Romance, Angst, Fluff, Pining, Mutual Pining, White Day, Pi Day, Baking, and most importantly, Pie.

Successor to this story I wrote for Christmas and this story I wrote for Valentine’s Day.

Sora wanted to do something special for Kairi for White Day. She’d gone out of her way to make Valentine’s Day special, so it was only right he returned the favor. Back home, that meant giving her a gift that was, uh twice? three times? the value of the original. But her letter was priceless, and those chocolates were special too, so he was at a loss as to what to do.

He paced back and forth in this place that looked like the Final World. He couldn’t give her a gift right now. Couldn’t tell her how he felt yet (not with words anyway) because she wanted him to wait till they met again. So what was he supposed to do?

Something that involved taking control of her body was all he had. His face flushed. No, not like that. Putting this whole body-sharing thing into words always made it sound worse than it actually was. He always waited till he had permission and immediately ceded control the moment she asked him to.

He plopped onto the watery ground that somehow didn’t ever get him wet and scoured his brain for ideas. What would he do if this was a normal White Day, if he was fully back in the Realm of Light with his own body at his disposal?

“Take her on a date. Maybe to the Bistro. Or I could cook or bake her something myself using the stuff Little Chef taught me.” He perked up. “That’s it! I’ll make something for her. I’ll just need to write down the ingredients so she can get them and then ask her for control when it’s time to actually make the stuff.”

He made a mental list about what he’d need for the recipe and then patiently waited. Something told him Kairi would be reaching out to him soon.

Sure enough, he eventually heard her voice.

“Sora? Want to take over for a bit?”

He followed her voice, chased it, pursued it till he was in her body. She was in her room on the Land of Departure, lying on her bed, and sunlight was streaming through the window. Must be morning, and she probably just woke up.

Hey, Kairi, he signed. Happy White Day.

“Happy White Day to you too.”

Desk, he gestured.

“You want to write something?”

He nodded.

“Okay. You can take control.”

He gently got her up out of bed and walked her body to the desk. She had a little diary for the two of them to write to each other now, and he opened it and grabbed a pen.

Ingredients List

Butter

Sugar

Whipped Cream

Coconut Chips or Shavings

Coconut Milk

He was about to write another ingredient when she interrupted.

“You want to bake me something for White Day, don’t you? You’re the sweetest.”

He smiled and continued, listing off the rest of the ingredients. When everything looked good, he added, Can you get these for me?

“Of course. We should have most of the stuff around the castle except for the coconut-related things. But I can buy them for you, okay? Or bop back to Destiny Islands real quickly if need be.”

Please do. I know it’s not much, but I wanted to thank you for your Valentine’s gift.

“Leave it to you to figure out a way to make it work. I assume you’ll want to do the baking yourself too, right?”

Yeah. I’d do it in my own body if I could. Make you a five course meal. When I get back, okay? This’ll have to do for now.

“This is more than enough.”

Talk to you soon.

He had to let go of the connection for now because he sensed danger. Curse the stupid monsters in Quadratum who kept pulling him back to their (un)reality. If he missed making Kairi’s gift for her on the appropriate day, these monsters were gonna regret they ever crossed him.

“Riku, where are you?” he grumbled as he fought them off. He knew Riku was somewhere in this reality, they just kept missing each other. It didn’t help that Sora’s heart was jumping all over the place, getting pulled more and more towards Kairi, while his body was stuck here. Glued to this place because abusing the Power of Waking meant it had been banished from the Realm of Light and couldn’t return.

As the last monster disappeared in a puff of smoke, he sighed and wiped his forehead. He was more convinced than ever that his heart’s connection to Kairi was growing stronger by the day. What would it take to get his body out of here too?

“Stupid body,” he said as he scowled at it. “Keeping me trapped here.” He let his Keyblade disappear and slunk towards a private alley. “Kairi won’t want a boyfriend without a body forever.” He sat on a box of crates and cast a barrier around himself to buy some time. “And I don’t wanna be without a body either. I don’t want my options to be body-less in the Realm of Light or trapped here forever.”

Sighing, he closed his eyes, imagining himself back in the Final World-esque place. Thankfully, he was able to will his heart back to Kairi pretty quickly. She was in the castle’s kitchen now, and all of the ingredients he’d asked for were dutifully set out.

Sorry I kept you waiting, he scrawled on the diary she’d left out. Had some monsters show up.

“Monsters? Sora, is it safe for you to be here?”

It is now. Trust me, if my body’s in danger, it lets me know.

“If you’re sure,” she finally said, and he could hear the worry in her voice. “I’ve put you in enough danger before as it is.”

Don’t I get to be the judge of that?

“Sorry, considering your current predicament and how you got there… No. You’re reckless when it comes to your own life if it means keeping me safe.”

Maybe, but I was the one who put myself in danger. Not you. And can you blame me? I wasn’t about to abandon you, with your heart in pieces and at Xehanort’s mercy. You would’ve done the same for me. You did, in fact. You refused to let me die like I was supposed to at the Keyblade Graveyard.

“That was different,” she said tersely. “I didn’t have to die to keep you alive.”

I didn’t either. I’m not dead. My body’s just—

“Cut off from the Realm of Light. How is that all that different from being dead?”

Sora felt like sighing. Kairi… We’re wasting what precious little time we have together fighting. I would gladly fight with you all day if I could, but I’d like to make you the gift I promised.

She hung her head, shoulders slumping. “Sorry, I’m making this about me and my guilt again, and when you’re in such a precarious situation, too.”

It’s okay. Sometimes I think you got the harder end of the bargain, watching me disappear, feeling all alone and abandoned.

“You didn’t abandon me. You came to my aid when I needed you most. And you’re the one who’s cut off from me, from everyone. You have it worse by far.”

Sora was about to write something when Kairi continued. “But today you’re gonna literally walk me through this recipe and we’re gonna have fun, okay? You need this, you need to relax and unwind and have some fun.”

Yeah. And there’s no person I’d rather spend time with than you.

She giggled, and his heart felt warm, hearing her giggle.

“Okay, Master Chef, teach me your ways,” she said, and with that she let him take over. He led her through mixing and chopping and cutting and stirring, and she was ever the attentive student. It had been so long since he’d gotten to bake anything. Since he’d gotten to unwind and have fun like this.

“So we’re making a pie, huh?” she said as he prepared the crust. “Don’t tell me… Coconut cream pie? That’s one of my favorites. And it’s the perfect dessert for White Day. Pi Day, too.”

The pie took a long time to make, but spending that time with Kairi was worth it. He’d spend every moment with her if he could. When at last the pie was chilling in the fridge, she sat at the table so he could write notes to her. His signing was still a work in progress.

Pie should be ready now, he wrote presently.

“Do you want me to eat it while you’re still here? It feels a little rude when you can’t.”

He didn’t like the twinge of melancholy in her voice.

I don’t mind. In fact I kinda want to know what you think.

“Okay,” she said and went to the fridge to grab the pie. It looked amazing with its crispy crust, its creamy filling coated with whipped cream shaped into perfect swirls, and its coconut shavings artfully sprinkled on top. He’d really outdone himself, and he couldn’t wait for her to taste it.

You’ll have to tell me how it is, he scribbled when she was seated at the table once more. She nodded and lifted a forkful of pie to her mouth.

Oh, yum. This pie was creamy and delicious and brought back memories of all the times he’d eaten his mom’s coconut cream pie back home—

Hold on. Hold on. He could taste the pie? How was that even possible?!

“Oh this is amazing,” Kairi cooed as she brought another forkful to her mouth. “Creamy and coconut-y and—”

“Sora?”

Ven was standing in the doorway of the kitchen, his mouth hanging open.

“You can see him?” Kairi squeaked, dropping the fork. “That’s never happened before!”

Sora froze. Ven could see him? How?

“Yeah,” Ven said, taking long strides towards them. “It’s like he’s kind of translucent, and I can still see you through him, but yeah, I can see him.”

Ven? Sora tried to say, but no sound came out.

“Do you think—Is his connection to the Realm of Light getting stronger?” Kairi asked, her voice so full of hope Sora could practically feel her heart soaring.

“Yeah, I think it must be,” Ven said. “Hang on, lemme get Terra and Aqua.” He paused for a moment to squeeze Kairi’s hand, and Sora’s felt a little warmer. “Be back in a second.”

The taste of the pie, the warmth of Ven’s hand… He wasn’t imagining this stuff, was he?

Kairi, diary, he signed, and she let him take control so he could write.

I could taste the pie. I felt Ven’s hand when he squeezed yours.

“That’s great, Sora! I think your body is trying to follow your heart back to the Realm of Light.”

Was it possible? He wanted it to be possible. He wanted to come home.

“Here, let me eat more of that pie, you must be starving.”

Please, he signed.

Kairi lifted the fork to her lips again when he felt a strong tugging on his heart.

“No,” she cried in frustration. “You can’t leave yet!”

Be back soon, he signed sadly. His heart was getting pulled back with a vengeance now, which meant he needed to protect his body. Happy White Day, Kairi.

“Happy White Day, Sora,” she said, and with that, he was back in Quadratum. Oh, great, more monsters had found him, and it was raining now too. He groaned and summoned his Keyblade. He’d much rather be eating coconut cream pie with Kairi in the Land of Departure’s warm and bright castle kitchen.

He was so close to finding a way home. Right on the edge. If he’d just had a little more time, he could’ve done it. Still, he was grateful for the moments he and Kairi had shared today. Making the pie and then tasting it together. He was more determined than ever to make it home to her. If he succeeded, then he and Kairi could spend as much time together as they wanted.

For that, he’d keep on fighting, however long it took.

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A/N: This fic is dedicated to the lovely @angel-with-a-pipette for coming up with the idea of Sora baking something for Kairi when I was trying to think of a follow-up to the Valentine's fic I wrote. Thank you again for all your help and input!

And Happy White Day and Happy Pi Day to you all! Thank you for reading!

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neoskidz · 4 years ago

Text

What A Mess || Kim Sunwoo

WC. 2.3K words

GENRE. Fluff / Fantasy / Witch!au

ELSIE’S NOTE. This was an old work that I wrote back when I was new on Tumblr. It supposed to be a stray kids fiction, but I decided to re-write it as The boyz fiction. And now, I repost it again in here.

SUMMARY.

As a friend and mentor, cleaning the mess Jaehyun made was never an option for you, it was a must. Including this kind of mess that involved Kim Sunwoo.

TAGLIST. [Networks] @tbznetwork @deobiwritersnet

It was a peaceful morning, one of the rarest days you could ever get. It just you and your morning tea. No Jaehyun nor his troublesome mess. You finally could relax for once.

Or so you thought.

A rather loud and impatient knock could be here from outside your house, ruining your peace. Which only means one thing.

Lee Jaehyun.

And that also explained how you got stuck in this situation.

“So… let me get this straight.” Jaehyun winced at your words and tone, shuffling guiltily in place as he took a sudden interest in his shoes. Eyes narrowing, you continued, gritting your teeth slightly as you fought to keep your tone even, so as not to frighten your surprise guest.

“You wanted to give me a gift as apologies for always troubling me, and instead of, oh I don’t know, a damn cake or something, you decided to make a magical perfume from a sketchy spellbook and made Sunwoo test it out… Am I getting this so far?”

Nervously he nodded, and you inhaled sharply, continuing. Out of thousand humans in this world, why did he test it on Sunwoo!?

It’s not like you were in bad term with Sunwoo or something. It just, ever since you became Jaehyun’s mentor, you rarely talk or meet him anymore. You were too busy cleaning your apprentice’s mess. Moreover, he was your childhood crush. How do you suppose to face him when he back to normal?

“Then, somehow, you managed to accidentally turn him into a kid with no memories what so ever, and no way of turning him back because the book didn’t say anything about how to reverse the spell… Have I gotten everything?”

You asked tightly barely fighting back a growl as he nodded again meekly.

Trying not to blow up at him completely, you turned your eyes to the silent toddler in your arms, face softening as you found him peering back at you quietly. Sunwoo had been crying and squirming when Jaehyun had arrived, and instinctively you had taken him from the lad, knowing how terrible he was with kids.

Almost instantly the small Sunwoo had started to calm, cuddling into you and looking at Jaehyun distrustfully, apparently having decided you were safe. He’d been perfectly calm and obedient for you ever since but had refused to let go of you even once, getting frightened every time Jaehyun came too close.

“I-if it’s any consolation, the age regression, and lost memories should fix themselves on their own in about a week… You’ll only have to deal with it until then.”

Jaehyun’s words interrupted your thoughts, and you looked back up from Sunwoo as you absorbed what he had said.

Suspicious, your eyes narrowed on him, your voice carrying a clear warning as you spoke. “…What do you mean I'll only have to deal with it…”

Your body tensed as you saw the way he fidgeted, a nervous laugh spilling from their lips.

“SorryIJustRememberedIForgetToTurnOffMyStoveBYE!!!”

“Yah! Lee Jaehyun!”

After blurting those words, Jaehyun leapt up before you could react, and promptly vanished with a pop, startling the little boy in your lap and leaving behind a truly obnoxious amount of slowly fading sparkles. Blinking numbly at the spot Jaehyun had just been, you slowly looked back down at Sunwoo still clinging tightly to you, meeting his wide eyes with your own, before letting out a deep groan and quiet curse.

Sunwoo simply blinked wide innocent eyes up at you in response, still thoroughly spooked by Jaehyun display, though he was finally starting to relax completely in your lap now that Jaehyun was gone. Seeing the toddler version of Sunwoo sitting in your lap was already doing your head in, and again you fought back the urge to groan loudly in frustration, giving him a small tired smile instead.

“Guess you’re stuck with me. Remind me to dropkick Jaehyun into the sun when he comes back, yeah? Maybe I can make him taste his own medicine.”

Not understanding your words, Sunwoo simply blinked at you, before mimicking your tired smile with a shy one of his own. Unwittingly, your heart melted, and you sighed, holding him a little more protectively against you.

“Noona,” You hummed at Sunwoo. “Are you and that guy witches?”

“Well, I can’t completely say we are a witch, but yeah, something like that.”

Sunwoo furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

“But, isn’t witch suppose to has hag-like crone appearance? You are too pretty to be a witch.”

You let out a giggle, face redden at his unexpected compliment as you put him down and ruffled his hair.

This Sunwoo was too innocent. It kinda reminded you of your childhood, where you guys didn’t know anything about magic yet, where you couldn’t do anything besides following Sunwoo around like a lost puppy. It was a nice memory.

“Anyway, have you eat any breakfast before coming here? I have some bread if you want.” He opened his mouth, wanting to decline your offer. But, his stomach spoke louder than his voice. “I will take that as yes to my offer.”

A week almost passed and yet, there was no sign of Sunwoo getting back to his normal state. He was still the six years old Sunwoo who still clueless to magic. You almost run out of excuses to not make him go anywhere—like his house, or more like his parents’ house since the old him live away from them—in this state. He seemed worried about something.

“Hey, Sunwoo. May I ask you about something?” The boy looked up and nodded. “Why do you want to go home so badly? It’s not like I don’t allow you or anything. It just… it’s kinda complicated.”

“Someone is waiting for me at home, and I’m sure she must be looking for me now in worry.”

“Your mom?” He shake his head no. “Then, who?”

“[Name], my friend. She is six years old like me but can’t do anything right without my help.” You blinked and titled your head in confusion. Did he just talk about you, the six years old you? Are you too depended on Sunwoo back then?

He let out a sigh before continued. “She is too innocent to the point she can’t distinguish which is dangerous and not. That’s why I have to go back soon and protect her.”

His speech made you stunned. Who would have thought he still could think of the six years old you in a situation like this. You could not help to wonder, is he still worried about you ‘till now. Maybe you should talk to him more often later.

“She is lucky to have a friend like you.”

“… please keep this a secret between us.”

You saw his cheeks redden at your praise before shyly turned away.

That noon, after the talk you two had, you decided to go down to the city with Sunwoo to have some fun. He must be bored staying at your house for almost a week without any particular to do.

You took him to your favourite cafe to try their famous macaroon, which you sure he will like.

As soon as you entered the cafe you were greeted by Jaehyun, the culprit that went missing for days who happen to be the cafe’s part-timer. If it wasn’t because of his shift, he might have run away from you again. He looked nervous as you made your order.

Your interaction with Jaehyun didn’t go unnoticed by the little Sunwoo.

When you two went sit on one of the vacant seats, he couldn’t help but ask, “Are you and that hyung dating?”

Dumbfounded by the unexpected question, you pointed your finger at Jaehyun and you, shuddered at the unpleasant thought. There was no way you could see your apprentice that way.

“No, we aren’t and never will.”

Sunwoo happily smiled, “Great! Someone pretty like noona shouldn’t date a guy like him.”

“Then, what kind of guy should I date?” You curiously asked. It’s not like you will take his answer seri—.

“Like me!”

Okay, that was unexpected and caught you off guard. Did he indirectly just say that you should date him? Oh gosh, your poor heart. You should teach him to not say something like that carelessly, after all, this kid was too innocent to understand how those words affected you.

“Really?” You decided to play along with him. “Too bad you are too young for me.”

His face looked panicked at the realization.

“Um.. give me a few years. I grow up into a man and ask you out again.” You could only laugh in response, spending the rest of your day with stories and sweets.

Later that night, Sunwoo insisted on sleeping together on your small bed. You let him did whatever he wanted since you didn’t know if you can be this close with him in the future.

You somehow couldn’t get a good night sleep, the talk you two had this noon kept you awake through the night.

Let alone a few years, a few more days you sure he will turn back into his normal self. Completely oblivious of this talk and promises, not remembering the memories you shared these few days.

You two will become awkward toward each other again.

And it made you sad.

The next morning, something woke you up earlier than usual. You felt engulfed in warmth as you’ve never felt before, thinking that Sunwoo had turned off the air conditioner in your room. You attempted to stretch out your hands only to realize they were confined by something—more like by someone.

When you shuffled in place a little to try and turn over, Sunwoo arms that were around your waist tightened. It took you a few second to completely awake and realized that his arms weren’t this long before.

Your heart thumped loudly at the realization, letting a buzzing sensation overtake your chest.

Your first reaction should be jumping out of his embrace and wake him up, maybe express some form of embarrassment and then ask him how he able to turn back into his normal state, but you didn’t. You found yourself not able to do that. Instead, you kept lying beside him like that, let yourself slip back into the dreamland like that.

Little did you know, Sunwoo was awake since the beginning. He should be asking you why he woke up beside you like this, what did Jaehyun do to him, and why he saw the six years old he made a love confession to you. Yet, he decided to enjoy the little moment and pulled you closer to him.

He will deal with those problems later.

Bonus:

"Why are you hiding here, again?" Haknyeon confusedly looked under the table where you were currently hiding right now.

Apparently, after what happened on the morning when the potion’s effect wears off, you’ve been avoiding Sunwoo for a while now. You either stay away from the places that he might visit or hiding at some places until he tired of looking for you for the day. Just like now.

You still not ready to face him in person. The same scene of him hugging you without knowing you were awake at that moment kept replaying in your head. And strangely, it made you felt weird. You actually kinda liked it. The fact he remembered everything after the age regression didn’t make you any less worry—not when it made your relationship became more awkward than before. To make it worse, the source of this problem seemed to be avoiding you too.

Most people on the town knew your relationship with Sunwoo. You two were childhood friends. It shouldn’t be a problem for friends to share the same bed. But, it would be a different case if it happens between friends who almost never talk to each other beside giving each other some greeting and including a sleepy hug, which not the type of skinship that Sunwoo likes to do with you on daily basis, that holding a hidden meaning.

Was he have a feeling for you or something? The little Sunwoo sure had—since he had asked you out at the cafe.

That’s why you either staying away from the places that he might visit, or hiding at some places until he tired of looking for you for the day. Just like now. This was already the third time you hide under the potion room’s one and only table.

Before you could explain it again to Haknyeon, Sunwoo came into the potion room and looked around.

"Hyung, do you happen to see [Name]? I couldn't find her anywhere." You clasped your mouth with your hand, shaking your head and warned the older man to not say anything with your eyes.

Haknyeon sighed and shook his head no, wondering how could he get dragged into your problem.

“I haven’t seen her since this morning. Have you checked the library?” Sunwoo shook his head in response. “I just from there, and she wasn’t there.”

“Maybe Jaehyun hyung could help you with that.”

After making sure Sunwoo had left for good, you came out from your hide out and sighed in relief.

“Thanks, Haknyeon.” He chuckled before putting down the potion in his hand.

“In the first place, why you need to avoiding him like that? You know soon or later you need to face him, right?”

Yes, you knew that, but you would worry about it later—

“Oh hyung, I forget to ask you—“

Or maybe you should worry about it now.

“...She has been hiding here all the time, huh?” Haknyeon tiredly pinched the bridge of his nose and nodded.

Realizing the situation, you quickly activated a teleportation spell and escaped the room. But, you were not fast enough to escape from Sunwoo’s grasp. Which teleport him with you. His tighten his grip around your arm, leaving you no chance to get away from him again.

"Stop running away from me!"

"W-who is running away!?" Sunwoo rolled his eyes at your obvious attempt. Knowing you from kids, he still could see how bad you were at lying. "You did. In fact, you were planning to do it right now."

"Well, you- I-" Your brain went overdrive as you tried to find some excuses.

He put his hands on your shoulder and looked at you in the eyes. And for the first time in the while, you finally looked at him in the eyes. You didn't know why he does that, but it did help you with your nervousness.

"Do you feel much better?" You bobbed. seemed like he still remembers about your habit when nervous. "Now, what are you trying to say?"

"I'm not avoiding you nor running away from you. It just..."

"You keep thinking about the confession that six years old me made, right?" He finished. " To be honest, I did think you're pretty, back when we were a kid until now."

Well, he was not completely wrong. You did think about it sometimes— "Wait, what!?"

"I like you, idiot." He chuckled, flicking your forehead lightly. "Hey! What's that for!?"

"For being a stupid and also a dork." You pouted a little while processing this new information in your brain. Great, now you have a reason to even avoiding him more.

Tack!

"Ouch!" You rubbed your forehead that got flicked again by him, "Stop flicking my head!"

"Then you better not thinking about avoiding me again!" He chuckled a little before finally left you alone. "I'm hoping for my answer soon."

#tbznetwork #deobiwritersnet #the boyz imagines #the boyz scenarios #the boyz x reader #tbz imagines #tbz scenarios #tbz x reader #kim sunwoo imagin #kim sunwoo scenarios #kim sunwoo x reader #sunwoo imagines #sunwoo scenarios #sunwoo x reader

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tomiokai · 5 years ago

Text

Reality||Spencer Reid||Part Two Of Drunk Words, Sober Thoughts

Masterlist

Part One.

{not my gif}

A/N: Like 4 people wanted a part two lol but that’s fine. So here is the long-awaited part two to Drunk Words, Sober Thoughts. I’m currently working on another fic so I haven’t been writing anything else, that’s why I haven’t been posting any fics. Anyways, enjoy!! Also, I forgot that JJ’s son is also called Henry, that just completely slipped my mind when I first wrote “Drunk Words, Sober Thoughts. So please excuse that. Also you have no idea how much I wanted to make the ending depressing but I decided against it.

Summary: After Y/n’s and Spencer’s explosive fight on their breakup anniversary, Y/n shuts herself out from everyone, even Henry. One day the girls had enough of Y/n’s behavior and decided to take things into their own hands.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader

Category: Angst

Warnings:Angst. Swearing. Drinking.

Word Count: 4.2k

Ice cream, sweatpants, and vodka, is one hell of a trio if you asked me. It has officially been three weeks since Spencer talked to me. He hasn’t called me yet like he said he would. Honest to god I had no idea what his problem was.

Ever since that night I barely got off the couch only when I wanted vodka or plain old vanilla ice cream and some food deliveries. I’ve been in the exact same pair of sweatpants for three weeks and the last one of Spencer’s hoodies he had lent me when we were dating, he never asked for it back and I never planned on giving it back. The smell of his cologne had detached itself from the hoodie a long time ago but I could care less. I probably stank honestly. I think I got up twice to shower??!! Maybe I’m not really sure. All I knew was that I looked like garbage.

Emily and the girl’s had tried hauling me out the doors to a nightclub to cheer me up but it didn’t work, I stuck to the couch like a potato. The morning of the fight I fell into a state that I honestly have no idea what it would be called, depression maybe, I sulked on the couch under a blanket for hours. Henry woke up when the birds started to chirp and crawled under the blanket with me, he had his small arms around one of my arms. Every time he saw a tear run down my cheek he would take his small hand and wipe away the tear. When I heard Henry’s tummy grumble Henry got out from under my blanket and walked off towards the kitchen. I had taken a peak from under the blanket and saw that he was in the pantry grabbing Oreo's. He brought me a few and my heart broke, I was supposed to be taking care of him not the other way around, but my body hurt so bad I couldn’t bring myself up to do anything. I was a horrible mother. That night he and I ate ice cream and goldfish crackers for lunch and dinner. It wasn’t till three days later when JJ came over to check on me when she discovered Henry eating leftover brownies from a few nights ago and me under my blanket staring at my phone waiting for Spencer’s phone call. JJ had tried to talk to me but not a single movement left my body. When she saw that it was no use talking to me she told me she was going to take Henry with her until I was better. I wasn’t offended by it and I didn’t complain, I trust JJ with Henry at the moment more than myself.

After Henry left that’s when I got off the coach walked out of my apartment looking like hell and went to the nearest liquor store and stocked up on vodka. Ever since then vodka and I have been best friends.

Throughout the week everyone except Spencer has come by trying to talk to me or comfort me. I locked the door and refused to look or talk to any of them. On the sixth day, Garcia started bringing me breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I still wouldn’t open my door though, so she simply left the food at my door and I would wait a few minutes when I’m sure she was gone, I would quickly grab the food and close myself in again. If she hadn't brought me food my whole diet would have been crap like ice cream, goldfish crackers, and some random shit I can find from the pantry.

Currently, I am sitting up (surprisingly) on the couch watching some stupid rom-com about this dumb couple who are madly in love with each other, waiting for my food delivery from Penelope. Truly I felt selfish for making Garcia bring me food every day and JJ taking care of Henry for me. After I get over this, I was determined to make it up to everyone who tried to help me during my dark time.

This wasn’t me. I’m not like this but Spencer of all people has this dumb power over me. Fuck my heart and it’s feelings.

I sat at the couch staring dumbly at my tv as the stupid couple slow danced in a meadow with fireflies surrounding them.

“Disgusting.” I sneered throwing a goldfish cracker at the screen.

Before I could complain more about the tv show, suddenly my doorbell rang and my ears immediately perked up! FOOD! I was starving. I made sure to wait a few minutes before I stood up and ran over to the door and swung it open. I was STARVING.

Before I could register what was happening I was pronounced on. I blinked in shock as I finally saw my attackers face.

“Emily what are you doing here!” I asked in utter confusion. I looked around and saw that JJ and Penelope also walk in through the door.

“Guys what’s going on,” I panicked. “Is Henry okay??”

“Henry’s A-OKAY,” Emily said getting off of me and hauling me up. “But you sweetheart is not okay.”

“Guy’s I’m completely fine,” I reassured.

“No you are not sweetie, you look like hell and your house is something else,” Garcia responded already picking stuff off my floor.

“You don’t need to do this, you guys already did so much for me.” I breathed out.

“Honestly Y/n you need all the help you can get, you have been sitting on that couch for three weeks crying over Spencer,” Penelope stated.

“Spencer has been getting hell by the whole team recently.” Emily chimed in.

“Mostly from Rossi,” JJ added.

“Oh?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Yep. Now let’s get you a warm bath.” Emily responded, as she started hauling me to my bathroom. Emily sat me down on the toilet seat as she leaned over the bathtub filling it with warm water.

“What’s JJ and Penelope doing?” I asked as Emily started pulling my hoodie over my head.

“They’re helping you clean up your dump of a house,” Emily sang back standing me up. “Now take a nice long bath and when your finally clean we are going to go see Henry.”

I nodded back to her reassuring her I’ll get cleaned up. She left making sure to keep the door open a smidge. I stripped the rest of my clothes and dipped one foot into the nice warm water. I slowly let down my foot into the water, then the other. I bent down and sat in the tub making sure I didn't spill any of the water out. The warm water surrounds me as relief and pleasure washed over me. The warm water felt reassuring to me keeping me safe from anything that could harm me.

I slid down the tub and submerged the back half of my head into the water not caring if the water had gotten into my ear. It felt like I was in the sky, it was peaceful and nobody could disturb it. But I spoke too soon.

Emily burst into the bathroom, might I add very loudly. “Y/n it’s time to wash your hair and scrub your body not lay down in the tub and look dead,” Emily said bullying me into a sitting position.

I groaned as my head lost contact with the lavishing warm water. “Fine” I puffed out.

Emily reached to my bathroom counter and grabbed my coconut shampoo, she squeezed a large amount onto her hand and gently lathered it into crusty hair.

“You know we found seven empty bottles of vodka in your cabinet alone. Did you drink all that yourself?” Emily asked as her finger ran threw my hair.

I nodded my head staring straight ahead at nothing.

“Okay, stand up and I want you to wash your body and rinse off in the shower and let the bathtub water out,” Emily said, rinsing her soapy hands in the water. She got up from her squatting position and left again.

I slowly stood up, slid the shower curtain shut and started the shower. I rinsed my hair out and went on to scrubbing my body with vanilla body wash. For the first time in two weeks, I was finally actually clean.

I turned off the facet off once I was rinsed off and got out of the shower. A nice clean towel lay perfectly folded by the sink waiting for me, I needed to thank Emily, JJ, and Penelope big time later.

I opened the door and instantly noticed my apartment was clean and spotless. “Wow, you guys really didn’t need to do this,” I said amazed.

“Don’t worry about it, now shoo, go get dressed,” JJ called to me.

I felt really bad that they were doing everything for me but I guess they wanted to do it considering they ambushed me! I walked into my bedroom and swung open the closet door. If I were to go see Henry today I was probably going to be seeing a whole bunch of other people so I decided on a pair of black jeans and a lavender button up long sleeve, that I decided to tuck in and black boots with a 4-inch heel.

I walked over to the small mirror by the door to the bedroom and stared at myself. Wow, I looked cleaned up.

I casually walked out of my room to find that my whole entire apartment was cleaned up and everything was in place.

“Wow, you guys really know how to get cleaned up, how could I ever repay you guys,” I asked as they walked over to me.

“You can repay us when you change into a different outfit,” Penelope said, linking her arms to me dragging me back into my room.

“Wait, why?” I asked as Penelope sat me down.

They didn’t answer but instead, JJ went straight to my closet tearing it apart, while Emily and Penelope went through my drawers.

“We’re going to show Spencer exactly what he has missed out on.” Penelope sang.

I watched as JJ flipped through my closet throwing things that she deemed “ugly” onto a growing pile on my bed.

“Y/n don’t you have any cute underwear?” Emily asked, holding up a very plain black pantie.

“Hey! Leave my underwear out of this!” I yelled jumping up and snatching my underwear back and shoved it back into the drawer. “And plus he’s not even going to see me half naked.”

“Yeah, but what if you meet someone and you never know,” JJ responded, pulling out one of my dresses that I haven’t seen in a long time.

It was a gorgeous baby pink dress that went down to right above the ankles. The silk v-neck dress had a beautiful seer covering over the dress and puffed out sleeves from the shoulders to the wrist, with a beautiful thick baby pink belt.

“Oh my god! That’s the one! It’s so pretty!” Penelope squealed.

“Don’t you think this is a little too much?” I asked, picking up the elegant dress.

“Of course not!” Emily resounded heading out the door. “Now get dressed again and we’ll take you to see Henry.”

Penelope and JJ left right after Emily leaving me alone to get dressed.

I turned the dress in my hand a few times before undressing again. I slid the dress over my head and looked myself up and down, I swapped the boots for some black heels and walked out of the room to regroup with the girls.

“Ohh! You look so beautiful!” Penelope gushed wrapping her arms around me in a tight hug.

“Thank you!” I laughed hugging her back.

“Come on do a little twirl,” Emily said smiling.

I let go Penelope and did a little twirl with my hands out.

“This is the dress! Spencer’s going to flip,” JJ said.

“I hope he does or you did all this for nothing,” I spoke lightly.

“Don’t say that, we did it for you mainly.” Penelope corrected.

“Mommy!” Henry cried as soon as I went through the door of JJ’s house.

“Hey, baby! I missed you so much” I said, picking up Henry in my arms.

“I missed you, mommy,” Henry said into my shoulder.

“Me too baby.” I cried. “Did you have fun with aunty JJ and uncle Will?”

“Yes, I did!” Henry said joyfully.

“How about I take you to go get some milkshakes? I asked looking at Henry.

“Yeah!” He excitedly exclaimed.

I turned around to face the girls with Henry still in my arms and said, “Thank you guys for everything, I promise I’ll somehow pay you back for all this.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Emily said with a wink.

“Oh and dinner party at Rossi’s at 5:30.” JJ reminded me.

As we walked out of JJ’s and Will’s house I pulled out my phone and dialed Spencer’s number. Confidence filled me as I did it but the longer it took for Spencer to pick up the more anxious I got. In the fifth ring, Spencer picked up.

“What do you want.” He spoke. He didn’t sound very pleased but also very tired.

“If you want to meet your son at all, meet us at the 24-hour diner on third street.” I shot hanging up before he could decline or accept.

I placed Henry in his baby seat and strapped him in. I got into the driver's seat and drove away to our destination.

When we walked through the doors to the diner the salty smell of burgers, fries and just fried food, in general, filled my nostrils. It reminded me of all the fun nights Spencer and I had here discussing everything and anything.

I looked around the diner looking for Spencer and there he was sitting in the corner, his back facing us.

I took Henry’s little hand in mine and walked slowly towards Spencer. As we neared the table Spencer turned around and spotted us, he didn’t do or say anything only looked at me then at Henry. His eyes never left Henry as we walked the rest of the way. I slid into the booth first and Henry followed along right after.

I looked at Henry and followed his gaze to Spencer.

“Who that mommy?” Henry asked looking up to me.

I looked down at him and said, “how about you ask that man sweetie,” pointing at Spencer.

“Who you!” Henry said joyously pointing his little finger at Spencer.

“Hey, buddy! I’m Spencer.” Spencer’s demeanor changed completely.

Wow, that guy sure knew how to change personalities real fast.

“Hi Spwencer, I Henry,” Henry exclaimed.

“Wow! I love your name. How old are you Henry?” Spencer asked, his eyes never leaving his.

I looked down at Henry and he was fidgeting with his fingers trying to hold up two fingers, once he figured it out he held it up high and said, “I two years old.”

“Wow buddy, you’re so big!” Spencer said, taking Henry’s hand in his.

All throughout their little exchange, Spencer never looked at me once or even mentioned me. I guess he was only here for Henry.

“Hey Henry what do you want from here?” Spencer asked Henry.

“I wan vanilla milkshake,” Henry said pointing at a girl a few booths down drinking a vanilla milkshake.

“And you Y/n,” Spencer asked, finally turning to me.

“I’ll just have a small fry,” I responded.

Spencer stood up from where he sat and dusted off his suit and walked away towards the cashier to order.

When he was finally talking to the cashier I quickly turned to Henry and spoke, “Hey Henry, what do you think about Spencer?”

“He’s fun!” Henry laughed pointing at Spencer. I followed his finger and saw that Spencer was looking at Henry very intently waiting for the food.

In my mind, I knew I couldn’t keep Henry all to myself and close Spencer out. After all, he was his child.

“Here’s your milkshake!” Spencer exclaimed happily, setting down a tall glass full of vanilla milkshake with whipped cream, rainbow sprinkles and a blue and white straw.

Spencer slid over my small basket of fries and sat down again in his original spot.

When I knew Henry wasn’t paying any more attention to us I looked to Spencer and said, “When are we going to tell him?”

“Right now if you want,” Spencer responded dryly.

“Then tell him,” I shot back. “Hey Henry, Spencer here has something to tell you.”

Henry’s attention instantly snapped to Spencer with glowing eyes and asked, “What!” excitedly.

Spencer glared at me before turning his glare into a happy smile and responding, “I’m actually your daddy. Isn’t that cool?”

I watched Henry as his expression changed a whole bunch of times from happy to sad to confused. But ultimately it ended up being very very excited and happy.

“Really!” Henry asked excitedly.

“Yeah, buddy!” Spencer responded with a big smile on his face.

Without a word, Henry got up from his seat and ran towards Spencer and crawled up to Spencer and wrapped him in a big hug. Spencer immediately responded, wrapping his arms around Henry's back.

“Are you and mommy married?” Henry asked curiously letting go of Spencer and pointing at me then to him.

Spencer looked at me and I nodded at him signaling him to answer the question himself.

“No we’re not Henry,” Spencer reposed.

Henry’s face fell but luckily Spencer saved it, “But mommy and daddy do like each other!” Spencer happily said.

“Yay!” Henry joyously yelled.

Spencer and I looked at each other for a moment and I turned away right after tears threatening to spill. Spencer must have noticed.

“How about I take you out and play for a day?” Spencer asked Henry.

“Yeah!” Henry cheered.

“Is that okay with you?” Spencer turned to me.

I hesitatingly responded, “Y-yeah, sure.” I responded.

Spencer stood up with Henry still in his arms and said, “Well we’ll see you at Rossi’s later. Say bye to mommy.”

“Bye, mommy!” Henry said, blowing me a kiss.

I pretended to catch it and put it in my pocket and said, “Bye sweetie, have fun.”

And with that Spencer and Henry left. Wow. Both my loved ones just left through that door. I felt a pang in my heart thinking about what-ifs. What if Henry liked Spencer better than me and left me alone with no one. Definitely not the best idea to overthink but that was exactly what was happening.

The whole day my mind never left Henry and Spencer. Constantly wondering what they were doing. Where they having fun, were they happy, were they hurt, were they in danger?

Every time I reached into my pocket to get out my phone and call, I stopped myself they probably didn’t want to get disturbed by me. Sharing Henry was hard for me. My mind wouldn’t let me rest at all.

Eventually, I found a way to distract myself. I went to a nail salon and had a very pretty lady manicure my nails. I poured my heart out to her and she was there the whole time comforting me and reassuring me that everything will work out in the end. That’s what I tried to think.

I stood outside of Rossi’s house debating whether I should just ring the doorbell or run away like a coward. I decided against running away and rang the doorbell and stood back and waited.

As soon as the door was opened by Spencer, Henry ran into my legs and hugged them!

“Daddy took me to a fair!” We had so much fun!” He exclaimed as I picked him up.

“Wow! Did he really?” I asked excitedly.

“Yeah! He won me this bear!” Henry said holding up a brown stuffed bear wearing a striped shirt and a top hat.

“It looks so amazing!” I responded, putting Henry down.

I looked over to Spencer and saw that he was proudly smiling at his son.

“Hey Henry, how about you go find Jack and other Henry and go play with them?” Spencer asked, ruffling his hair.

“Yeah!” With that he took off to go find the others.

After Henry was out of view Spencer started walking without another word I followed him into Rossi’s backyard. The October sun was slowly setting in the distance as I followed Spencer to the very back of the yard as far away from the house as possible.

When we finally stopped, Spencer didn’t turn around and face me and that pissed me off. “What?” I spat crossing my arms over my chest.

Spencer spun around to face me and slowly drew out, “Why didn’t you tell me you were pregnant.”

“Because,” I said hesitantly, “be-because I don’t know.”

“You didn’t give me a chance to be a father.” Spencer said, waving his hands around to his words.

“I didn’t want to burden you!” I whispered looking down.

“With my own son?” He asked, shifting on his feet.

I looked up to face him and said, “No! Me! I didn’t want to burden you with me.”

“You could have at least told me!” Spencer said, his voice rising.

“And what! What were you going to do! Take time off from your job! Make time? You never did that for me! So would you have done it for Henry?” I yelled tears stinging the corners of my eyes.

Spencer didn’t say anything, he was lost of words. I knew I was right and I had hit a spot.

“That’s what I thought.” I spat.

“You don’t know that! Henry is my son!” He yelled, cornering me into the back fence.

“I was your GIRLFRIEND!” I yelled.

“AND?” He asked first slamming on the wood my back was pressed to.

“IF YOU COULDN’T TREAT ME RIGHT, HOW COULD YOU HAVE TREATED YOUR OWN SON RIGHT.” I yelled furiously jabbing one finger into his chest.

He grabbed my wrist and pried it away from his chest and breathed, “You didn’t even give me a chance.” quietly.

“I know, I’m sorry,” I cried.

“Just let me be a good father to Henry. I’ve proved myself worthy of taking care of him today.” Spencer said letting go of my wrist.

“I know you're capable of taking care of him, I’m just afraid you’d leave him unexpectedly like what you did to me,” I whispered leaning my head back so that it touched the wood.

“Y/n, I’ve changed for the better. When we started dating I wasn’t fully committed. I just had so much on my mind.” He said cupping my face in his hand and bringing it back up so that I was looking at him in the eyes.

“I wish I could believe you,” I whispered, shutting my eyes, tears running down my cheeks.

“You can. I’m committed to Henry. And I know you’re not over me. So just let’s give this a try” He stated carefully.

My eyes shot open and I raised an eyebrow at him. “How do you know,” I asked.

“Because I was the reason you shut yourself out from the rest of the world. Word travels fast in the bullpen. I’m also a profiler, I read people. Ring any bells?” He answered wiping a few tears away.

“Ugh I hate the fact you can read me so well,” I let out a shaky laugh.

He laughed with me, our foreheads touching. “I miss us, you know?” I whispered quietly trying very hard to not ruin the peace.

“I know, me too.” He whispered back.

“We fight and we get into arguments. But that didn’t stop me from loving you.” I cried.

“I know and I was an idiot for letting you go.” Spencer whispered. “I just needed space when I broke up with you.” He responded.

“And what about that other girl?” I asked.

“Amanda?” She was just a one night thing.” Spencer answered.

“Yeah okay whatever.” I rolled my eyes.

“Let’s give us a try one more time. For Henry and for us.” Spencer pleaded.

“Will I regret it?” I hesitantly asked.

“You won’t. I promise.” Spencer whispered, kissing my cheek.

I looked deep into Spencer’s eyes, searching to see if he was lying to me. “O-okay we can give it a try.” I breathed out.

“Can I kiss you now?” Spencer asked.

“Mhm” I laughed, leaning into Spencer.

@april-14-blog

#Criminal Minds #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds angst #criminal minds fluff #spencer reid #dr spencer reid #spencer reid angst #spencer reid fanfiction #fanfiction #fanfic #spencer reid fluff #mgg #mgg fluff #mgg imagine #mgg x reader

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storiesforallfandoms · 5 years ago

Text

a great team ~ yungblud

word count: 1730

request?: yes!

“could u maybe write a dom/yungblud fic?? maybe he meets a writer working for his record label (she could be writing someones biography or smth) and they hit it off and then maaaybe flashfoward to them being together??”

(i made her a songwriter i hope that’s okay!)

description: in which a famous songwriter is paired up with a famous alt. rock musician and they find out that they’re a great team, in more ways than one

pairing: yungblud x female!reader

warnings: swearing mainly

masterlist

You checked the time again as you tapped your fingers against the steering wheel. You were late for the meeting you had with the new artist you were supposed to be working with because you left your house later than you meant and got stuck in traffic. You didn’t even know who you were supposed to be working with because your agency hadn’t told you who it was yet, so you couldn’t even contact the person to tell them you’d be late!

You sighed heavily as your car moved about another inch. You looked at the time once again, willing the traffic to let up so you could make it before the artist just left.

The one upside to being stuck in traffic was that you were having some good ideas for songs. The downside was that because you didn’t know who the person you were supposed to be working with was, you had no idea if the song would be the right genre for the artist. Regardless, every time your car came to a stop you wrote some more lyrics down. By the time you finally got through the traffic you had a whole song written.

You were humming a possible beat to yourself as you raced through the hall till you got to the studio you were book in for the day.

“I am so sorry, traffic was absolutely awful and I got stuck,” you explained the moment you pushed the door open.

The person waiting for you was a younger looking guy with a messy mop of black hair, wearing an oversized hoodie and a pair of skinny jeans. He looked up at you and smiled.

“It’s cool! I figured that’s what it was. I’m not long here myself,” he responded. He stood and held his hand out to you. “I’m Dom, professionally known as Yungblud.”

“Oh! Yeah, I know you. I love your latest EP, it’s like the most played thing on my phone right now.” You realized his hand was still extended to you. “Oh! Right! I’m (Y/N).”

“Nice to meet you, (Y/N),” Dom said.

“So,” you said as you both sat down together, “why do you need a songwriter? I thought you wrote your own stuff.”

“I do,” Dom responded. “But my label is pushing for my next album like now, so they called in some help. Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful for the help, but I hate being rushed. Making music is a process that can’t be rushed.”

“Trust me, I understand. I’ve had my fair share of singers essentially being forced to work with me because they’re under some sort of time limit to get an album done. Record labels just don’t get it because all they do is slap their name on the thing and release it to the world.” You shrugged. “On the positive side of all of this, while I was stuck in traffic I managed to write a song if you wanna check it out.”

“Like a completed song?” You nodded your head and laughed at Dom’s bewildered expression. “Yes! Let me see it!”

You passed Dom your phone. You watched him read through the lyrics in silence, waiting anxiously for his reaction.

He started nodding his head and humming to himself before singing a couple of the lyrics. The melody he came up with was definitely much better than what you were humming.

“It’s amazing!” he finally said. “That’s perfect! I have to make a note of this melody in my head before we continue. We’ll work on the instrumentals later. I only need like four more songs and then the album is ready to go.”

“Let’s get to work then!”

You two were sat there for hours on end. It was easy bouncing ideas off of one another and banging out three more songs together. It was as if you both had the same mind when it came to songs and lyrics, and even melodies as you were eventually coming up with the instrumental ideas for the songs and both your ideas were the exact same.

Before you knew it, you had the album written. All that was left to do was figure out the instrumentals and the vocals.

“Well, that was a breeze,” Dom commented. “We make a pretty great team, huh?”

“Honestly, you’re the best musician I’ve worked with,” you told him. “Most people I work with, especially on such a strict deadline, are so hard to write with. They want the album to be perfect since it’s so close to being released that they refuse some of the stuff I write because it’s ‘not their style’ and ‘too simple’. I wonder why they kept me around for so long. Realistically, you could’ve told me to leave at any time if you weren’t enjoying my company.”

“That’s awful,” Dom said. “I don’t understand how people can turn down help when they obviously need it. It’s hard enough to write one song by yourself, let alone having to do multiple in one session. Even if the lyric didn’t sound like something they’d sing, that’s why they’re there, to make it sound like their style.”

You shrugged. “Some people are afraid of being called out for having a ghostwriter, too. I’ve worked with a couple artists who said they’d consider my ideas and then didn’t use them at all so they didn’t have to put my name in the writing credits. It’s all about appearance, you know. If you’re found out to have a song writer help you they accuse you of ghostwriting. It’s hard in the industry to be a songwriter alone and not a singer-songwriter.”

Dom shook his head. “That’s not right. Most people need a professional songwriter to help them out.”

You chuckled. “Yeah, tell me about it.”

There was a prolonged silence between the two of you. You weren’t sure what else to say or do. You both technically had the studio booked for another hour, but there wasn’t much that could be done right now without a producer or any musicians present. A couple of the songs written were meant to be collabs with other singers, so those couldn’t be done until Dom reached out to those artists.

“So,” Dom started after a moment, “you said I can tell you to leave at anytime. I know we technically have another hour before our session is up, but would you be opposed to being kept a bit over our time?”

You raised an eyebrow, confused by his question. “What do you mean?”

“Like...I dunno, would you wanna grab something to eat or something?”

You couldn’t help but smile at the question. “Yeah, I would love that.”

~~~~~~

A few months later, you were sat at home watching a late night talk show in which Dom was performing and being interviewed. His performance, which was of the song you had written that day in traffic, had just ended and you were waiting for the show to start back up after the commercials.

When it finally did, there was Dom, sat next to the interviewer and smiling widely.

“Welcome back, ladies and gentlemen we are sat down now with Yungblud!” the host announced. The crowd cheered in excitement and Dom was beaming at them all. “So, this new album, it comes out in about a week. What can fans expect from the album?”

“It’s a sort of different album as far as what fans usually get from me. It’s still my usual style but it’s sort of different subject matters on each song than what I usually sing about.”

“And I heard that you actually had a songwriter brought in to help you write some of the songs.”

Dom nodded proudly, unashamed to admit it. “I did, yeah! Her name is (Y/N). She’s honestly the best songwriter in the game if you ask me. We got together and I’d say in 2 hours flat we had songs written, melodies figured out and we had sent out samples to artists we wanted featured on the album. That’s the fastest I’ve ever gotten anything done.”

The audience applauded and you couldn’t help but smile at, even though no one could see you.

“On the topic of this songwriter,” the interviewer continued, “there have been some reports that the two of you may or may not be dating. There’s been pictures of the two of you together getting very cozy.”

The smile on Dom’s face only got wider. He looked up at the interviewer and shrugged before responding, “I guess the cat’s out of the bag. Yeah, we are dating. We have been since that day in the studio, actually. We thought we made a great team songwriting wise, let’s see if we make a great team dating wise. And so here we are.”

The crowed cheered excitedly. You felt as if a massive weight had been lifted off your shoulders. Keeping this relationship a secret, even if for a couple of months, had been the toughest thing for you. You just wanted to tell everyone that you two were together. To post all the cute pictures you had saved on your phone, to not be afraid of being caught by fans or paparazzi. To just be a happy couple in public no matter what.

Now, it was out there for the world to know, and you couldn’t feel happier about it.

The interview continued until the host thanked Dom for coming onto the show and plugging his album one last time before going to commercial. Nearly seconds later, you phone was ringing. You looked down to see that it was Dom trying to facetime you. His face was still beaming with pride when you answered his call.

“Did you see it, babe?” he asked. He sounded so excited, like a kid in a candy store.

“I saw it,” you confirmed. “How do you feel, baby?”

“I feel so free!” he declared. “I’m so glad to publicly call you mine.”

You couldn’t help but giggle. “I’m glad to publicly call you mine, too. Finish up your press tour for your album soon and come back to me, I miss you.”

“I miss you, too, love,” he told you. “I’ll be back soon, I promise.”

He kissed his camera and you giggled again, kissing yours back. Yeah, you both definitely made a great team.

I’m sorry if this sucked :/

#yungblud #yungblud imagine #yungblud x reader #dominic harrison #dominic Harrison imagine #dominic Harrison x reader #imagine #request #one shot #imagine request #leave a request

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smolbeandrabbles · 5 years ago

Text

Control - Ralph Anderson x Shifter!Reader 2 (The Outsider)

Sequel to Halfway Home

@mandy23b @wltz-bby @happyskywhale #mendotagsquad

Author’s Note: This song, this damn song, oh my god. I confess I hadn’t listened to any Halsey at all (besides a couple of collabs with other artists I like) until I was music swapping with @mandy23b... But I honestly don’t think I’ve loved an album this much lyrically in a very long time! Anyway, a second part was always in the works. This song for sure inspired the finish of it.

Thank you @mendelskrull and @crawlingmist I really REALLY hope the sequel was worth the wait 🙈🙈🙈🙈

Control - Halsey

Disclaimer: gif not mine / lyrics not mine / The Outsider & all associated characters not my property!

I wrote this before I read ‘If It Bleeds’ but I see the immediate eerie similarities in my Shifter species. I think I might cover it off in the finale...

Premise: After a particularly erratic encounter with Ralph Anderson, you wait on your fate... can you trust the Detective to make the right choice? Can he trust you, at all?

Words: 5737

Warnings: Swearing

⚠ Major Angst/Hurt Caution Warning (Again) ⚠

_____

They send me away to find them a fortune A chest filled with diamonds and gold The house was awake, the shadows and monsters The hallways, they echoed and groaned

I sat alone, in bed till the morning I'm crying, "They're coming for me" And I tried to hold these secrets inside me My mind's like a deadly disease

I paced around for hours on empty I jumped at the slightest of sounds And I couldn't stand the person inside me I turned all the mirrors around

I'm bigger than my body I'm colder than this home I'm meaner than my demons I'm bigger than these bones

And all the kids cried out, "Please stop, you're scaring me" I can't help this awful energy God damn right, you should be scared of me Who is in control?

---

Your first visitor the following morning surprised you. You thought Ralph might just have blanket banned the entire city from seeing you, but apparently some just wanted to break the rules. DA Kenneth Hayes stood hesitantly in the doorway watching you, clutching papers close to his chest – and you were inquisitive enough to wonder if he was about to serve you, or, you were going to be dragged into a questioning room. You sat yourself straight against the wall and folded your arms; “What will it be Hayes?” He jumped, and for a moment you thought you’d get a good laugh out of the papers scattering – no such luck though. “Detective Anderson has already appeared to have considered the full 48 hours. I just hoped as the DA you’d be able to shed a little light on the subject.” He was staring at you like he couldn’t believe you were talking, like an animal had suddenly found a human voice. You weren’t in the mood; “Look if you can’t tell me anything-” “Ralph told us to stay away from you.” “Then why are you here?” You realised how exasperated you sounded, but you hardly cared. “Are you… are you really…?” It was obvious that Hayes couldn’t bear to even voice it. “Yes. I am what he says I am. No, I didn’t have a hand in anything that happened here…” You tilted your head, “I don’t see why it has much consequence to you. They didn’t even tell you.” “But I know now.” You sighed; “Hayes just put me out of my misery, what’s the big plan!? I know I’m behind bars but I’m not an animal in a zoo.” Your eyes flashed, and it caused him to step back, truth was you were no longer trying to hide it, and they could all blame Ralph for that. “Least you could do is stop gawking at me like I’m about to spring into some kind of murderous, child-killing rampage, or change form.” He swallowed, “Ralph has it all planned out and I trust him.” “You know he put a gun to my head yesterday, right?” “I’m aware.” “Sounds like intent to me.” You scoffed, “I suppose to you I wouldn’t come under the remit of human rights, huh?” The way your eyes were burning an odd iridescent silver, and emitting light the way they were, made Hayes even more uneasy than just the thought of you really being a Shapeshifter, and he backed away – heart racing, “Good day, Y/N.” You shook your head after him with a roll of your eyes – Humans had always been so typical. Part of you wished for the days of old, when your kind was fascinating, mystifying and worshiped – and you could all coexist. Before humans, as they did, got ideas beyond their station. Now you were still revered, but not for being so unusual – for the thought alone that you could threaten their existence. People like Kenneth Hayes would brush this off as a bad dream and would never allow it to be mentioned or lingered on again, even if it was witnessed. Ralph would never forget – and it would scar him deep; that was without the added heartbreak of you. You were the final nail in the coffin for your beloved detective. You were sitting against the bars with your eyes closed the next time someone joined you. And you were immediately suspicious by the level of calm they issued – for one, you weren’t even in the mood to have visitors now. Ralph hadn’t come by, and by now you were thinking of refusing an apology if he even offered one. “Go away.” You groaned softly, “I don’t need you all staring at me like I’m some form of entertainment.” There was a tap against the bars and you cracked your eye open, greeted by a disposable coffee cup; “I’d rather make sure you were okay.” You took the cup from Detective Sablo, “Why? You were in Tennessee too. Your best friend know you’re doing this?” Yune sighed as he crossed the room to sit on the bench opposite your cell; “He’s not my best friend.” “Yeah he is…” You took a sip, and hummed in gratitude; he’d remembered your coffee order. Yune smiled gently; “I’m not afraid of you.” “You should be. He is.” “He loves you.” “Loved. I think you’ll find.” And you’d not forget that soon enough, your heart still greeted you with a sharp pain in remembrance. “Ralph’ll come around.” You indicated to the cell that you were stuck in, and it made him grimace, “Okay, I know. It’ll be a long time…” He ran his hands through his hair, “But I believe in the two of you – Look, Y/N, I want all of us to get out of this… I’ll talk to him; we’ll get you out of here. I promise.” “I’m not sure he wants to see me.” You took a few gulps of coffee, “At least not alive.” “Ralph’s not like that, you know he’s not like that.” You finished the cup and placed it outside of the cell for him to collect. “Yune, answer me one question.” He nodded, ready for it, and you breathed, “Who killed the Shifter in Tennessee?” “…I think it was a joint effort.” “Answer the question.” “I wasn’t there-” “Yune!” He had to realise that skipping around it was just as bad as what you knew the answer was. He swallowed hard, and couldn’t meet your eyes, “Ralph did.” You gave him a pointed look; which made his statement all but useless, “RALPH did.” *** Surprisingly Ralph Anderson did make his way down to you. You thought he might leave it the full two days and deal with you when he had to let you go, or when Hayes had figured out something that would lead to you spending a lot of time in prison. Maybe they’d even work out a way to pin the death penalty on you. You wondered if it’d work – but you weren’t sure you wanted to be the test subject. Or maybe he’d found a lab somewhere that was going to take you in – despite the fact that he’d spent the later part of his threats yesterday telling you that he’d rather no one knew you existed. You were back to lying on your bed and studying yourself with a depth of self-hatred – that this was something you’d chosen for yourself. That if Ralph Anderson came face to face with the real you, he probably wouldn’t have hesitated with pulling that trigger. That the blood flowing through your veins looked like the ink Ralph would make notes with in every interview he’d ever conducted, otherworldly, ethereal… dark and cold – rather than the rich red that could be associated with such emotions as anger, love and passion. The kind of emotions that were easy to feed on – your preference was love. Love was strong, and it only got stronger, and even when it wasn’t some kind of all raging passion when two people were all over each other, it was still there. And if you could surround yourself with couples (particularly those that had been in love a long time) you were at your happiest; and also your strongest. You supposed your Cherokee City counterpart had the same edge, but for fear, anger and total chaos. You could eat like a human, but you could sustain yourself on emotion alone. If he’d chosen a better path, he would have been able to as well – but he had to cause the pain he fed on. Which is why he had to move so frequently. After all, you couldn’t keep those close that you made angry or fearful of you – let alone if they died. But if someone loved you, if someone really loved you, you could live the rest of your life on them alone. You’d spent the best four years of your life living on his. But that was not the emotion that overtook Ralph Anderson’s body as he entered the room. It never would be again. You turned your head to him, and were met with that icy steel blue; calmer than last night, which you were glad of – you didn’t want to have to face that erratic anger again. But it hurt you; because your heart stirred just to see his face, and you had to push all of that back once more. He kept track of your every movement, but said nothing. When Ralph was satisfied, he opened the door; “Out.” You raised yourself, “What, they didn’t give you the full 48?” His eyes narrowed slightly; “I said out.” You stood and he unlatched the handcuffs from his belt “Hands front.” You raised an eyebrow in questioning but did as he asked. This was even more painful for Ralph – half of him felt terrible for going so out of control yesterday; half of him knew he was face to face with a monster, a woman who had lied to him for four years and broken his heart. He wasn’t about to apologise – and didn’t think you were either. He still kept his eyes on you as he picked up the bag, hating the fact that you were wearing one of his favourite shirts – he should never have given you that. But Ralph didn’t want any of your things in the house. He pulled himself upright to full height – you took half a step back, still not sure of exactly what he would do to you. You didn’t think Ralph knew himself. “Lets go.” He pulled you out of the cell and down the corridor – Ralph wasn’t about to tell you where of course, and it left you wondering if you were about to be met by a lawyer and a judge, and the same kind of water tight evidence that Terry Maitland had been. You supposed to the humans here your race deserved nothing less. And perhaps they were right. Humanity had never scared you; even when it had driven your race to hiding – you’d grown up around them, and you’d blended well. But humans had become the kind of scary stories told to children that ‘monsters’ were to them. Ralph’s reaction was simply proving every one of those stories true. When he pulled you back to the elevators you wondered if this was about to be Terry and the courthouse part II. Crowds of hundreds wanting a glimpse of a terrifying creature, and a few well aimed shots… “Stop it.” He growled, although he refused to look at you – talking to him was only going to make it worse, but upon flicking your eyes to the elevator doors you realised that all the thoughts in your head were causing your eyes to burn silver again. You blinked a couple of times and they returned to their ‘natural’ colour. Ralph gripped you tighter as he pushed you in, and as you found yourself in the parking lot, you were surprised to see there wasn’t a soul in sight. That only made you turn to him; “Where are we going?” He ignored you, pulling him along to his car and opening the back door – your stare was defiant and this time you demanded it, “WHERE are we going!?” “Get. In. The. Car.” Ralph’s voice shook with every syllable and you knew he was dangerously close to losing it with you again. He also probably didn’t like that you weren’t about to just let him order you around here, you’d always had a little bit of push about you – it was an aspect of your personality he really liked, especially when you were snarking someone he didn’t. Right now, Ralph didn’t need or want it – he just wanted you to get in the car so that he could do what he must. You only conceded because you weren’t sure you wanted that stalemate to end with getting shot – a little too aware of the pistol on his utility belt. He slammed the door on you and took a deep breath; it wouldn’t take much – he’d done it before. If he could keep a clear head, he could do it again – Ralph could finish this easily. All he had to do was get through this. *** You realised very quickly that you were heading for the city limits and sat up, twisting around in your seat. No court case? No going back home? You knew where the jail was and he certainly wasn’t heading that way. What was he doing? You bit your lip, knowing it couldn’t be good. Wondering if Ralph was numb to it all, or was simply that good at controlling his emotional output. It scared you that you weren’t sure of the answer. And suddenly you wished you didn’t know the answer to the question you’d asked Yune; one tear leaked and you rubbed your cheek on your shoulder to hide it, heck, now you wished you’d never asked that question in the first place. When Ralph finally stopped the car you weren’t sure ‘middle of nowhere’ covered it. You weren’t even sure what you were supposed to feel – and he’d been off-roading for so long he might well have been lost. Maybe Ralph Anderson wanted to get lost. It occurred to you that he might not want to be found out here; maybe he’d take that pistol and kill you before turning it on himself. Ralph didn’t seem like the type, but you felt perhaps now you’d seen him at his worst (what else would you call the previous evening), maybe he was… maybe he could do something that devastating. He drummed his fingers on the steering wheel for a long time before he decisively shut the engine off – gathering his radio, cell phone, and gun, Ralph hopped from the car and pocketed all items before opening the back and dragging you out. Ralph marched you a little way from the vehicle and stood you roughly in the grassland before growling at you to stay still, and walking back towards the car. He stopped, maybe 10 paces from you and turned back. You blinked, but no emotions crossed your face. That only made him angrier, but Ralph wasn’t sure what he wanted to see out of you – blind rage and anger that would prove to him you really were the monster underneath your guise? Tears streaming down your face and begging him for mercy – as you rightly should be, after everything that had gone down in the past few months, after what you’d done to him for years. Maybe even controlled acceptance of your situation, that it had to end this way and you were alright with that. But there was nothing; not even that shiver inducing silver in your eyes. The silence eschewed and you found yourself looking around, fields and farmland to one side rolling for miles into hills, and a forest in the distance on the other – too far to think that even with your decent sprinting you could get into cover before he put a bullet in your body. Maybe if you weren’t human, but you weren’t about to give Ralph Anderson the satisfaction of seeing your true form. You looked back to him and took a step; “Look, whatever you’re gonna do… Will you just do it already.” The pistol was drawn immediately; “NOT another step.” “You’re really gonna use it this time-!?” You couldn’t help your cold laugh; “I swear to God Ralph Anderson, if you have it in you, it better be a good fucking shot.” If he wasn’t about to keep the venom out of his voice then neither would you. Ralph just shook his head. Paying more attention to his gun than you, he checked everything was in working order; “How could you do this-!? Do you not even think about what you’re doing to the person you’re with-!? How utterly selfish it is to play someone like that?” You flinched, pulling back a few paces – the metal of your restraints cutting into your wrists. What right did he have to ask you something like that? “Look at me, Ralph Anderson.” He didn’t. And this time you weren’t sure if you were crying from anger or because it was hurting you so much and you were just letting it; “RALPH! LOOK AT ME!” You yelled it, “Look me in the eye and tell me that even without the Frankie Peterson case, if I’d have told you what I was then you wouldn’t have reacted in exactly the same way-!” He raised his blue eyes to you, and he didn’t have to answer, the guilt was already there. “Tell me the second I said shapeshifter you wouldn’t have thought me insane – that the second I’d have shifted into someone else to show you, you wouldn’t have cast me out as a freak and wanted to use your damn pistol on me anyway.” “You could have HELPED the case!” “It’s NOT the case-! Stop pretending it’s the case! If you knew what I really was Ralph, you’d run 1000 fucking miles and not look back and you know it. The case!?” You looked around you again and now he could clearly see the tears running, “The case has put me in a field in handcuffs waiting for the man I love to kill me.” “NO. Don’t!” He held his hand up, “Don’t tell me you love me. You gave up that right.” “Then for Godsake Ralph,” you presented your body to him, “Just get it over with because I can’t take this.” your eyes narrowed, flickering again, “But don’t you dare presume to tell me that I can’t love you.” That was decisive enough and he swept his pistol up to aim for your head; yet Ralph knew he was thinking too much. He just wasn’t sure what the right thing to do was – wasn’t killing you just as bad as murdering someone? Sure, he’d killed one of you in Tennessee – but you weren’t an evil murdering entity (as far as he knew). You were you. And what Ralph would have to accept was that even if you were a monster, he couldn’t end your life without killing a part of himself. You watched all of this cross his face, even though his look maintained the utter hatred and disgust for what you really were, and you were soon yelling at him again; “Oh, why don’t you just aim for my heart—!!!!” He gritted his teeth; “Because that won’t work!” Hadn’t your counterpart taken a shot gun and a knife to the chest before he’d crushed its head with a rock? How many bullets would you take? Could he count on it being a one and done? You gave a shrug, wondering if there was just enough love in Ralph left for you to somehow talk him out of it, “For him maybe-! For me who knows-!” You focused acutely on his body, you knew that DNA so well by now; you could feel Ralph Anderson coursing through your veins even when he wasn’t a part of you. His breath was small, but still significant – the safety gave a click, and you realised this was the time to be anything that you could be but scared. Even if your fear was driving you to this. You didn’t really want to die, after all. You hadn’t come all this way in so many lifetimes for a Cherokee City detective to end your life in the middle of nowhere. “If shooting me is so easy for you, do it Ralph. But I should show you what you’ll do to yourself-!” Ralph would have asked you what the hell you meant. Ralph would have asked a million questions that he never got the chance too; because real fear finally flickered across his face, and his body became rooted to the spot, eyes wide. One second he’d been staring at you, defiant even in the face of your own death by his hand – until your eyes illuminated once more; but instead of it just stopping there, your whole body seemed to shimmer out of focus and pixelate. It clearly didn’t take you months to shapeshift into someone else – because now Ralph Anderson was standing face to face with himself. And if it wasn’t for the fact that your eyes were still a gentle silver colour (always the last thing to accurately render), it would have been just like looking in a mirror. Instead Ralph got chills; he’d seen a lot, he would admit to that much, but he’d never seen anything as unnerving as this. He had no choice than to immediately look away from you, hand over his mouth, for fear of throwing up over all this once again. Your eyes narrowed and you tipped your head to follow his movement – he better not think he was getting away with that. Unfortunately, your straining on the cuffs still didn’t cause them to break, and you could already feel the likelihood of leaving Ralph’s DNA in the middle of the field as pretty high, considering how raw your wrists now looked. “Look at me.” Oh, that was much worse. The shudder that coursed through Ralph’s body must have been visible – his voice coming from you; well him, but- It wasn’t him. He shook his head continuously. This was too much. This was way too much and Ralph was suddenly aware of how in over his head he was. He should have brought back-up. He should have listened to his friends. Ralph Anderson suddenly realised just how alone he was out here; and finally comprehended just what was in front of him. “LOOK AT ME!” This time you screamed it, repeatedly, admitting to yourself that there was a certain power that came with being in someone else’s body whilst also facing said person. And it’d never felt so good as this moment. Eventually Ralph Anderson did – but you could feel him when you were like this – and if anything, he was only looking at you because he wanted it to stop. He straightened; the pistol was still very much in play but lowered and hesitant, still you didn’t trust him not to take out your knee at the way he was holding it, and that finger was still hovering on the trigger. “What is wrong with you?” You continued, wondering if he might even listen to himself, “I can tell you what I think is wrong with you, Ralph Anderson, and you can hate me for it all you want – but I think it’s about time someone told you the truth.” You took a step and the pistol raised a little higher; “You have survivors guilt for whatever the hell happened in Tennessee, you feel guilty about everything that happened to Terry; from the way you arrested him to the way he died, guilt that you’ve left the Maitland family in the state it’s in and two girls without a father, guilt for the Peterson family because they’re all gone now – not forgetting the fact you shot Ollie. You think you’ve got off lightly with therapy sessions. For the record, I think he’s a God awful therapist and I get the feeling you don’t hold him in regard much higher than I.” You took a breath, “You feel guilty about everything that happened on this case, and every other fucking person that suffered at the hands of that shapeshifter and everything it ever touched.” You pointed to yourself… or… himself. “But I am NOT it, Ralph!! I didn’t do ANY of that. And you’re still here! You’re still alive and you’re still breathing! And you have friends and people who LOVE you!!!” You shook your head, suddenly a picture-perfect image of the man who’d been on the other side of your cell yesterday; “Face yourself—!! Face the person YOU are-!! How hard can it be!?” You couldn’t place your fingers exactly on the look on has face, it was such a distinct form of fear. No-one in the world should have to face themselves in such a way as this; and you could see it, Ralph Anderson was terrified of you. And you acknowledged that with a twisted smile; “Yeah. You’re damn right! You should be scared of me.” But it wasn’t just you, was it, that’s what you were getting at; “Scared of ME and yourself – at the man you can become!”

By this time Ralph was shaking, his hands were trembling and all he needed was one shot. Perhaps that was the point – was that what you were saying? By ending you, he might finally have peace? Or were you saying that’s what he thought he could have and it wouldn’t be that way? That he should face everything he’d done… that he thought he might have done, even when he hadn’t, and feel better. You didn’t want to die, but if he was going to do it the only thing you wanted right now was Ralph Anderson to be free from everything that haunted him. Even when you’re pointing a gun at my head I still fucking love you… But the shakes became sobs, and even Ralph knew he couldn’t hold that gun steady enough to take a clean shot. His vision blurred as tears ran; “God dammit-!” The pistol left his hands, settling in the grass – and Ralph’s hands went back to his face, trying to wipe those tears away as if you hadn’t been staring at him long enough to see them. Knowing it was over, you shimmered back to yourself, and although you wanted nothing more than to run over to him and hold him close to reassure him – the situation still had you standing calmly in the spot that he had placed you – waiting for Ralph to free you himself. Your detective crossed the grass to you, tears still staining his face, and again you found yourself wanted nothing more than to reach out and hold him close. You weren’t sure you’d like the result of that one – he had pointed a gun to your head and been seconds from pulling the trigger. Twice. In two days. Even though his hands were still trembling as he pulled yours towards him, he managed to unlock the cuffs with ease. “R-Ralph-” “Go. GO-!” He wiped his eyes again, nudging you away from him; resolve completely done. And you had a terrible feeling that Ralph Anderson was more broken than he’d ever been before. You shook your head, closing the gap again and trying to get him to look at you; “You don’t mean that…” You whispered gently, glad that he didn’t put away when you placed your hand delicately on his arm, “…You don’t.” “I do.” If there was ever a time to let him know that no matter your race you were still you, it was now. Maybe he expected the monster to run for its life. The woman who loved him would stay. “Tell me, Ralph Anderson. Tell me you want me to go. Right now. Say those words. That full sentence.” He was still determined not to let his eyes meet your face; “I want… I want….” But his body was still shaking; and his lip quivered. Ralph didn’t finish his sentence before he was sobbing again. “You can ask me to stay. Ralph. We can go back. I know this is going to take time, maybe a lot of time… but we ca-” “No. We can’t.” He shook his head, “I won’t.” Your face fell as he held out his car keys, “Take it. Take the car and go - I don’t care where, anywhere - just not Cherokee City. Not back to me.” “Ralph…” Your disbelief was more than evident, after all, you hadn’t done anything wrong and yet realised you were the one begging for his forgiveness now; “…Why? What about you?!” “Yune can pick me up. Look TAKE them!” He closed your hands around the keys and stepped away from you again, “Leave-! I’m letting you go, God dammit just GO!” “NO!” You shook your head again, “Why won’t you let us fix this? We can make this work! You know we can!” “BECAUSE I DON’T WANT TO BE WITH YOU ANYMORE!” You were forced into a stunned silence, and your eyes couldn’t help but burn again. If you expected anything from him, it wasn’t that. You opened your mouth, but suddenly found it hard to form words. “I DON’T EVER WANT TO EVEN SEE YOU AGAIN-!!! BUT I CAN’T EVEN KILL YOU – I LOVED YOU TOO MUCH TO KILL YOU, AND WHAT DOES THAT MAKE ME!?” Ralph ran his hands through his hair, and suddenly that strange crazy energy he’d given off the evening before was back – but a hell of a lot more erratic. “R…Ra…Ralph.” You weren’t sure it was something you could reason with; and he snapped, just to prove you right; “GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE! FUCKING GO!” His advance on you made you stagger back, and this time the fear that ran across your face was something he’d never seen before. It unnerved him but he couldn’t stop now; “LEAVE! NO ONE IN CHEROKEE CITY WANTS YOU AROUND ANYWAY!” That was just a little too much, there was a knife already through your heart, he didn’t have to twist it. You were staring at a man you’d loved for four years, and you didn’t recognise him at all. ‘Oh my god, who… who is this man?’ The pain was unbearable, and you didn’t want to cry – you couldn’t show him he was upsetting you; but Ralph Anderson probably already knew exactly what he was doing. You shook your head, continuing to walk backwards towards the car – staring at him hard, even if you couldn’t hate him you could still let him know how angry you were. And you’d show him your anger before you let him upset you. ‘Human beings, all the same… I should just have listened…’ Throughout history when weren’t you told to never get involved with one? Lifespan was the least of the worries at the top of any other shapeshifters list; but you’d always been fascinated – and their biggest advocates. They were afraid and they had to drive you to this point, that always made sense – but they were fragile, and emotional, and they could love in ways so unconditional that you’d never seen another species replicate. Yet here you were, and the one you’d wanted to spend the rest of his life with was doing this. And Ralph Anderson was one of the good ones. “You have it wrong, Ralph Anderson. So fucking wrong. You think you don’t know me... but really, it’s me that doesn’t know YOU.” You didn’t turn as you kept backing towards his car, “How can you – YOU – prove my race so fucking right!?” You opened the door, still glaring at him, you wanted to say it, you wanted to tell him that you couldn’t believe you’d ever loved him. But you couldn’t. You couldn’t even bring yourself to pretend you felt that. Because even now when he was breaking your heart – you’d never loved a person as much as you had him. And you knew you didn’t know where you’d go from here – but you knew you’d carry that feeling with you for the rest of your life. There would never be another Ralph Anderson. You stopped looking at him, slamming the door shut, belting yourself in and starting the engine, throwing it into gear. You paused with a deep breath and allowed yourself one last glance at him. Standing there in the middle of a field alone watching you leave. Take a good hard look, Y/N, because you will never see this man again… You peeled your eyes away with an exhale, and closed them, counting to 10 before you pushed your foot to the pedal and the car began moving. But now you were stuck with eerie silence, and the echoes of his voice in your head – the remnants of his DNA in your veins. You knew Ralph would never let you go, but right now you couldn’t handle that. And suddenly realising how alone in the world you were, you had to pull over to the side. Tears were running before you’d even slowed to a stop, you buried your face in your arms against the steering wheel and all you could do was let out huge, shaking sobs. God damn you, Ralph Anderson… Why?! *** 9 Months Later…

You’d watched him for a little while, sitting in that little corner coffee shop. You would call him new in town; only you’d seen him a few times whilst running around. He drew you in in a similar way to the detective whose face you wore a little more often than you’d care to admit. Ralph’s body made you feel safe when you were alone, especially at night – he was familiar, his voice was familiar. Comfortable. Yet, with Ralph you could torture yourself for everything you’d ever done – and you were no longer content with looking at your own form. This man was gone because of you. Still, there was something about the one you were watching that you couldn’t quite put your fingers on… You tapped your stirrer against the top of your cup and bit your lip gently – never a fan of making the same mistake twice. But you knew that aura well, and he wasn’t human. Which was why you were sitting here and you looked like you again. Even though you couldn’t let him go; it was still Ralph’s shirt you were wearing, it was still his car you were driving, it was still him that you cried over every night. That didn’t mean that the man now turning from the counter with his coffee didn’t intrigue you enough to try it; had you found one just like you? His eyes met yours, and that silver flashed. And this time you couldn’t help but smile, using exactly the same tell on him. He wasn’t expecting it, and immediately froze, despite the tiny smile making its way to his lips.

And for the first time since you’d left Ralph Anderson in a middle of nowhere field, you didn’t feel quite so alone…

---

I really appreciate your support for this series 💕 Thank you for your readership! I’m sorry!

#Ralph Anderson #Ben Mendelsohn #Ralph Anderson x Reader #The Outsider #The outsider hbo #HBOs the Outsider #Ralph x Shifter!Reader #Shifter!Reader #Dia #Ever since reading If It Bleeds she certainly looks like Dia and not an AU!Harmony...#I mean I think this is probably worse than either of you were envisioning #UGHH! THIS SONG!!#SHE HAS SO MANY AMAZING SONGS FOR THE BOIS!!!!#IT'S SO CRAZY AND I LOVE IT!#158

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13-reasons-ideas · 5 years ago

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Pls pls can u do a Monty x oc, you’re with your friends & they keep teasing u asking u who’s this guy you’re so in love with and when u tell them it’s Monty their faces fall and they start giving u crap about him so u defended him and told them that u didn’t care what they thought explaining that u won’t justify your relationship with him, you end up choosing Monty over your friends & later when u meet up with him you know you’ve made the right choice💕

I met my friends after school at Rosie’s for milkshakes as per our usual Friday afternoon tradition. I got there first, so I sat at our usual table near the door and pulled out my phone. As I grabbed it, it buzzed and I saw Monty send me a text, have a good time with your friends Liv. Maybe order something different this week. Could be fun for you. I’ll see you in a bit. I love you. Smiling to myself, I quickly responded.

You too. What would you suggest oh master of milkshakes? See you after. Don’t worry, I’ll update you on all goings on in the Clay hole. I love you too.

Maybe try a vanilla milkshake. Oh joy. I’m so looking forward to that….

I had to hold back a laugh at his suggestion. I’m sorry, did you just suggest vanilla? YOU suggested vanilla?

That’s about the only thing I suggest be vanilla, little miss. I felt my face heat and didn’t respond.

“Hey Olive.” Clay greeted as he sat down.

“Hey Clay. Where’s Tony?”

“He had to work. His dad needed him at the shop.”

“Okay, Justin is coming today, right?”

As soon as the words left my mouth, the bell above the door dinged and Justin walked in, his letterman once again around his shoulders. I missed that look on him. Jess was tucked under his arm and she smiled brightly.

“Hey guys. Make room.” He said as they sat down. Jess sat across from me as Justin sat beside me.

“Hey Jess.” I greeted her.

“Hey Olivia.” She responded, the smile on her face falling slightly. She still wasn’t fully comfortable with my friendship with Justin. Little does she know, he’s not even on my radar. We chatted a bit before Marie came to take our order. Since we wait for our whole group to arrive before we order our shakes, we settled on an order of fries while we waited.

A while after we got our fries and talked amongst ourselves, the last two of our little group showed up.

“Scooch over Justin, my turn to sit with Livy.” Zach joked, pushing Justin aside. Alex laughed behind him. After some rearranging, we were all seated comfortably in the small, yet somehow accommodating booth. I was sandwiched between Justin and Zach. Marie came over again and took our orders. As usual, Clay and Justin got chocolate, Jess got strawberry, Alex got peanut butter cup, Zach got chocolate strawberry. When it was my turn to order, I took Monty’s advice and ordered vanilla. My friends looked at me like I had sprung another head or something. Marie furrowed her brow at me but wrote it down when I nodded at her. We also ordered another fries to snack on.

“Vanilla? What about your usual chocolate orange?” Alex asked.

“Decided to try something different.” I shrugged.

“Okay Olivia. But if you don’t like it, you still have to drink it.” Justin told me.

“Sure thing Dad.” I teased with a roll of my eyes. The group laughed along with us and my phone buzzed. Deciding to be polite and not check my phone at the table, I ignored it. After we had gotten our milkshakes and fries, we chatted idly for a while until my phone buzzed again. And then again.

“Someone’s popular.” Clay said. I chuckled as I looked at my phone. If someone is texting me that fast in succession, it could be important. I blushed as I saw that it was a couple of random texts from Monty, about something he was watching on tv. Hiding my phone from my friend’s view I typed a quick reply, I’m with my friends. I’ll talk to you in a while. Love you.

When I looked up, my friends were smirking at me. “What?” I asked, “Is there something on my face?”

“Yeah. Red splotches.” Clay said plainly.

I threw a fry at him and he looked affronted. I threw another one and he caught it in his mouth. Changing the subject, I asked him, “so what’s going on in the Clay hole?”

“Ah, you know, Justin has years of annoying brother stuff to catch up on. So that basically.”

“Hey, I only do it because I love you. You know that.”

“Mhmm, I know. That’s why you leave lasagna from three days ago on the counter in our room.”

Justin merely shrugged and stuck his fry in his shake.

“Dude, that’s gross. Also, don’t leave food out. That’s also gross.” I chided.

“It’s delicious Liv. And yes Mom.”

“I’m sure Lainie feels the same way, yes.”

He threw a fry at me and I caught it in my mouth triumphantly. My phone buzzed a few more times and I ignored them. A few minutes later, it buzzed again, and I took a quick peek. Can’t wait till I get you alone and we can discuss exactly why vanilla is only good as an ice cream flavour. One text read. Another read, I’m only half sorry about that. Mostly because you know it’s true. I felt my face heat again before a smile spread across my face as I read another text, But really. I can’t wait to see you soon beautiful. I didn’t answer him and instead, locked my phone again. Looking up, my friends were once again staring at me. I took a long sip of my milkshake in lieu of responding. This isn’t actually all that bad…. “Vanilla shake, more smiling, running off as soon as school is done.” Alex mused.

“She gets more than one drink at Monet’s in the morning too.” Zach muttered.

“Changed our tutoring to lunch. A lot more texts when we are together.” Justin added.

“What’s his name?” Jess asked.

I took another sip before answering, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Right. And so if there’s nothing, explain why you don’t pull your hair up as often anymore.” Clay implored. Maybe he’s not as oblivious as we all thought.

“Guys, it’s nothing. My cousin is coming into town and my mom just wanted to make sure everything was in order.”

“Livy. Your mom has never texted you that much. And your cousin doesn’t make you smile. I believe there was a story of the time you cut the heads off of her barbies for pushing you in the mud.”

“She ruined my favourite shirt Zach. She had it coming.”

“I don’t deny she did. But you can’t expect us to believe that there is no one. You’re different. Who is he?”

I paused before pulling my hair back into a low ponytail. There was a small hickey just under my ear. “No… Olivia. No.” Justin muttered when he saw it.

“What?” Clay and Alex asked together.

I took a very long sip of my shake and took a deep breath before responding, “Yes Justin.”

“No. I refuse to believe it.”

“What? Who are you talking about?” Zach asked, not seeing the man’s mark on me.

“I-it’s Monty….” I stuttered quietly. There was a pregnant pause before Jess burst out laughing.

“That… that’s funny. There’s no way he would go for a girl like you.” She said. That’s only slightly rude. I made no sound of defence or any attempt to answer. “Wait. Seriously?” She continued, her eyes darting around the table. I simply gave a small nod. Again, it was quiet while my friends digested the information they were just given. Their faces had all fallen.

“Monty? Honestly Olivia?” Alex stated but I could tell he intended it to be a question.

“Yeah.”

“He’s a dick.” Clay said.

“He’s violent as shit.” Zach added.

“He’s not very smart.” Jess muttered.

“He’s mean Liv. I thought you were smarter than that.” Justin chided.

The group’s list of reasons why he is all wrong for me went on and on until I couldn’t stand to listen to their bullshit anymore. “Okay. I understand you are mad. That is fine. What is not fine, is you sitting here and talking shit about the man that I love.”

“You love him?” Clay asked, dumbfounded.

“Yes. I do. And he loves me.”

Jess huffed out a laugh, “please Olivia. Montgomery wouldn’t know love if it bit him in the ass. He is incapable of feeling it.” That’s it.

“Fuck you.” I said plainly to her. She stared at me her mouth open in shock.

“Olivia!” Justin gasped.

“No Justin. Listen to me. You are all being ridiculous. I know you have this idea of what Montgomery is like. He has a temper, yes. He has shitty coping mechanisms. He uses violence to feel something he can’t express verbally. It’s not healthy and he knows that. We are working on it. And before any of you ask, no. I do not think he would ever hurt me. Oh and since you all seem to think he’s an idiot, he isn’t. He is actually very smart. I don’t deny that he has issues. But don’t act like none of you have issues. Clay, you have this idea where any information that doesn’t fit what you think a person is like, must be wrong. You’re idealistic in a way that is not only reckless but makes you look like a dumbass. Justin, you’re an addict. I know you’re in recovery and it’s hard sometimes, but I also know that you understand the adage of ‘once an addict, always an addict’. Zach, you’re a pushover. You want to please everyone. Unless it doesn’t suit you. Then you are an ass to everyone because you want to keep your butt clean. Don’t act like me dating Monty and not telling you is any different than what you did to Hannah after that summer. Alex, I don’t think I need to explain your issues. And you Jessica, you were fucking Justin while you were dating Alex. And you’re jealous that Justin and I are friends. So, don’t fucking sit here and act like you are any less fucked up than he is. Just because he deals with it in a way you wouldn’t, doesn’t make him a bad person. I don’t need to sit here, and fucking justify my relationship to any of you.”

My friends sat in shock at my outburst. I could feel the blood rushing in my head as I took a breath. “You really feel that way?” Zach asked.

“Yes.” I said bluntly.

“Well in that case,” Alex started.

“Don’t make me choose.” I told them.

“Why not?” Clay demanded.

“Well for one thing, its fucking childish. And for another thing, you won’t like my choice.”

They were silent in response. That’s my answer then. As I grabbed my bag, Zach stood up to let me out of the booth. I took one last look at my friends before putting cash to cover my drink and portion of the fries on the table and turning to walk away. I texted Monty when I got in the car, can you come over please? I need you.

He replied almost immediately, give me ten minutes. I’ll be right there Liv.

I got to my house a few minutes later and got myself a cup of water before going upstairs to reapply my perfume. I caught sight of a few pictures of the group of us on my shelf, the seven of us including Tony at one formal or another, the six of us goofing off in the park, Justin and I after he got back from rehab. Fucking best friends my ass. Before I could stop myself, I gathered the photos in my arms and took them downstairs. Clearing a space in my living room and moving the area rug, I snapped. I threw the pictures one by one to the ground, the glass shattering or cracking and the frames breaking at the impact. When I went to throw another one, my front door opened. I heard Monty’s voice in the distance, “Olivia?” He walked over to me, being careful of the glass littering the hardwood. I felt his arms wrap around me, “hey hey. It’s okay. You’re okay.” I felt myself slump into his strong arms as tears filled my eyes. Taking the picture from my hand, he placed it on the couch. He held me tightly and walked me to the couch and pulled me into his lap, “shhhh. It’s okay. Everything is okay. Just breathe, I’m right here.” He soothed.

Once my crying subsided, I was able to find my voice again, “I t-told them about you.”

“Okay.”

“A-and they… they.” I hiccupped. I felt his arms tense around me.

“What did they do Liv?”

“They were horrible. They hate me Monty. They made me choose.”

“They what?” His anger was evident in his tone.

“They made me choose. It was them or you. And I couldn’t… I couldn’t choose them if that’s how they were going to act like that when I fall in love with someone.”

He kissed the top of my head and held me until I was calm enough to stand. “You go change. I’ll go get the broom and we can clean this up, what do you say?”

“Mkay.” I said, numbly. By the time I had come back down, the pictures were gone, and he was in the process of sweeping up the mess. I went to grab the hand vacuum and cleaned up the microscopic bits the broom missed. Once the living room was back in order, Monty queued up my favourite movie and we cuddled on the couch. Definitely made the right choice. I’ll worry about the fallout on Monday.

#13rw #13 reasons why #montgomery de la cruz #fanfic #clay jensen #montgomery de la cruz imagine #fanfic writer #zach dempsey #alex standall #jessica davis #justin foley jensen #monty x oc #monty de la cruz fanfic #monty de la cruz #monty x reader #monty imagine #montgomery de la cruz x reader #montgomery de la cruz x oc #My Friends Over You

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captainamericasbeard · 5 years ago

Text

Rescue 9/10

Pairing: Alpha!Bucky x Enhanced!Omega!Reader

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: none really

Summary: The Avengers are sent in to rescue a group of omegas from the hands of Hydra. There Bucky finds you, an enhanced omega. Can you ever be fully rescued from what Hydra has done to you?

A/N: This chapter wrote itself. There’s friendship, hugs, bloody knuckles, and thigh holsters. I don’t think anyone on this hellsite can write about a thigh holster without paying tribute to @kentuckybarnes Agent 28. If you haven’t read it yet, you’re a fool. IF YOU WANT TO BE TAGGED PLEASE SEND AN ASK.

Rescue 8 l Masterlist

You lay in your nest staring at the ceiling like you had been ever since Steve deposited you there three days ago. Sleep occasionally stole it’s way through your room as you lay listlessly in a tangle of sheets and Bucky’s clothes. You were desperate for his scent, craving it like a cigarette. You wanted your lungs full of him, but he was gone. Taken by Hydra off to god knows where and you were left here alone, with no way of getting him back.

You rolled over in your nest, tears slipping down your cheeks again when someone knocked on your door. Rap rap rap, the noise of it hurt you and you groaned, pulling a blanket up over your head.

“Y/N, I know you’re in there. Open the door!” Thor’s booming voice came from the other side of the door. You refused and buried yourself deeper in your nest.

“If you don’t open up I’m coming in,” he insisted, jiggling the door handle only to find it locked. You made no effort to move. Seconds later with a crash and a grunt Thor entered you room. An angry cry came from Tony down the hall. Thor gingerly propped the door back on its frame before turning to you apologetically.

“Sorry, but you’ve made us all desperate, locking yourself away in here,” Thor said. You blink at him. You have nothing to say. Thor sets himself down on the edge of your couch, arms resting on his knees and hands folded in front of him. The two of you stare at each other for a few moments before Thor speaks.

“I’m scared too, Y/N.” Your lip quivers and a few more tears escape at his words. “Everyone is scared actually,” Thor continues “but everyone is out there doing their part to try and find Bucky. Tony has all his tech running around the clock searching for Bucky’s face. Nat and Clint are running down every Hydra agent we’ve come across, looking for someone who knows something. Steve and Sam are vying with all the powers of the UN to bring him home. People are working, Y/N. What are you going to do?” Anger pricked at your heart at Thor’s words. Lightening flashed in your eyes as you stared him down. He stared right back. He wasn’t challenging you, he was honestly asking the question. What are you going to do to bring Bucky home? A few seconds of staring and all your resolve withered. The light died in your eyes again and you cried in earnest now.

“What can I do, Thor? What am I? I’m not a genius like Tony? I’m not a super spy like Clint and Nat or a superhero like Steve and Sam? I’m a freak that was rescued from a cave. Everything I am, Hydra made me. I’m only a functional person because of Bucky and he’s gone. And I can’t bring him back.” Your words came through gulps of air and shuddering sobs. Thor came and knelt at the side of your bed, careful not to touch your nest. He reached out a hand for yours and you had a flash of mad dancing and hysterical giggles. You took his hand timidly.

“You’re right, Y/N, you’re not Tony or Clint or Nat or any of us. You’re you. Not a freak made by Hydra. Not a shell of a person propped up by Bucky. You are you. You went to all those hard therapy sessions and talked through what happened so you could find out who you truly are. You trained harder than I’ve seen anyone train to become so much more than what they made you to be. And if you’ve relied on Bucky too much I know you have the strength to stand without him now. To train again, to go with us, and help us find him. I know out of all of us, you are the one that can bring Bucky home. Because you love him more than any of us and you hate Hydra just as much. You can bring him home.”

Thor’s words broke you. All the pain and fear you’d been cramming inside your chest broke out with an almighty wail. Your body heaved with sobs and Thor scooped you off the bed and into his lap on the floor. He held you in his arms and rubbed soothing circles on your back and let you cry it all out. Which is all you’ve wanted for three days anyways, to cry and be held. And as you cried you felt the poisonous fear leaving your body to be replaced with something else. An obsessive feeling of determination was digging its claws into your heart telling you to do whatever it takes to see Bucky again. As the feeling took root, your sobs slowed and your breathing steadied. You peered up at Thor and giggled slightly, embarrassed by the position you found yourself in. In spite of yourself, you threw your arms around his neck and gave him a huge hug, knocking him backwards into your table. He laughed and squeezed you back.

“Thank you Thor,” you whispered in his ear, “Thank you for being my friend.” You looked him in his eyes and found the shining love of friendship radiating back at you.

“That’s what I’m here for, Y/N.” Thor replied with a smile. Shakily you stood up, all the blood rushing to your head. You were trying to remember when the last time you’d eaten was when you swooned a little bit. Thor gently caught you by your elbow.

“Whoa there, dear friend. Let’s get you to the kitchen, shall we?” He hooked his elbow around yours and guided you through the broken door and down the hall. You entered the common area and everyone stopped what they were doing to look at you. Wanda approached you first and wrapped you in one of her mama bear hugs. You felt instantly calmer and more able to face the others. Tony strode over to you with his hands in his pockets and his eyes on the floor. When he finally looked at you his usual cocky demeanor was gone.

“I’m sorry Y/N, we all are. We’re doing all we can to find him.” “I know you are Tony. Thank you.”

Gradually the others surrounded you offering hugs and apologies. Sam was obviously just as shaken as you were to lose Bucky. Nat whispered that he blamed himself as Sam turned away. Steve still couldn’t bring himself to look at you. You knew he was shouldering more guilt than anyone. You walked over to him and lifted his chin till his eyes met yours.

“Steve, I need you to train me,” you say with a quiet certainty. Steve searches your eyes, confused.

“You’re not mad at me?” he asks.

“How could I be? If there was anyway for Bucky to be here right now, he would be. None of this is your fault. It’s Hydra’s. Let’s make them pay for it.” You said, your eyes hardening. Steve nodded.

_______________________________________________________________________

Six months of training sees you transformed. Your lithe body is now tense and toned, ready to lash out. Nat has taught you how to make every inch of your body a weapon, to not just rely on your powers but to be able to strike discreetly. Sam has you fully trained on weaponry, even Bucky would be impressed with your speed and skill. You stuck to guns- knives held too much association with Bucky and you couldn’t bear the thought of someone else teaching you how to use them. Steve oversaw it all, watching your determination with pride.

While you had been training the search had continued. You got regular updates from Tony. They nearly thought they had him back in an old haunt in Siberia but it was a false lead, another trap. Then again in sweltering South Africa, but the base was cleared out before they ever got there. Lead after lead, base after base, they searched in vain it seemed. Every base they attacked was either cleared out or filled with low level operatives with little to no intel.

Until they got to a cramped corner of Eastern Europe. Nat had been tailing who they believed to be a high ranking operative within the Hydra weapon’s division. The sort of man who would have been trained by the sort of men who made Hydra’s greatest weapon. The exact sort of man who would have wanted that weapon back. Nat tagged him and trailed him to an empty alleyway. He must have thought he had the upper hand, but Nat got the drop on him and dragged him in.

That was a week ago. SHIELD had sent in their best nutcrackers but no one could get him to talk. Tensions were running high and you could see even Tony was starting to sweat. Steve caught you crying into a punching bag. You had been in the deserted gym alternating punching a bag till you couldn’t breath and sobbing until you couldn’t see straight. Steve came in, took one look at you, and walked back out. He walked straight down to the detention wing. He came back thirty minutes later with his knuckles covered in blood and Bucky’s location.

“Jet leaves in 20,” Steve said, never taking his eyes off yours.

The compound broke into a flurry of activity. Tony rushed you to his lab to show you the suit he’d been working on for you. Skintight like Nat’s but with the ability to help you conduct electrical currents and a thigh holster to boot. You thanked Tony with a peck on the cheek and rushed off to change. You joined the team to a chorus of whoops and whistles.

“Wait’ll Barnes gets a look at this!” Sam quips, giving you a once over. Even Steve nods with approval. The team settles down and turns their attention back to the holoscreen in the middle of the desk with the little intel Steve had been able to “gather.”

“It’s a large base deep in Northern Canada that’s been off our radar until now. Intel says it’s similar in size to the one we rescued Y/N from. Scientists, agents, the whole bit. Should get a good bit of intel off them too, Nat that’s your job.” Nat gives a curt nod of agreement.

“And what if we find…Not Bucky. What if we find The Solider?” Sam asks the question no one wanted to ask. Eyes flicker to you and your eyes find Steve’s.

“Then we’ll handle it, won’t we, Y/N.” You clench your fists as fear tightens your heart.

“Yes, we will.”

Chapter 10

_____________________________________________________________________

TAGLIST: @fanfictionjunkie1112 @kiki5283 @humanexile @starkrobb @alyxkbrl @momc95 @bullshitantichrist @the-omni-princess @animegirlgeeky @acf2510 @fluffyirwinie @disasterwelshgirl @jamesbarnesappreciationsociety @veronawrites @guccicloudz @holyhumorliteraturelight @mrsalwayswrite @no-clue-whats-happenin @booktease21 @mymomcallsmefury @fafulous @asgardlover75 @susmita121 @noseyrosey1597 @jennmurawski13 @buckybarnesscrunchie @learisa @kinkywitchy @mywinterwolf @dyanna-corona @procrastinating-angels @shellbeerocks @broco8 @just-a-littlebit-of-everything @sweetybuzz25 @cookies186 @badassbaker @buchanan-lover

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mirrerover · 5 years ago

Note

They both refuse to acknowledge it out loud, but one side of the couch is definitively better than the other. Prompt pals: domestic taekook edition!

Dude, first of all you’ve send this over half a year ago, this is only like a 1000 words and it’s not even that domestic, so sorry about that. I don’t know what this is. I’m jobless and frustrated and projecting. XD Anyways, a thousand apologies and enjoy my very brief verbal vomit.

---------------------------

“This place feels like hell,” Taehyung says one afternoon, sitting on the left side of their raggedy couch. Like he’s said every afternoon for the past three days of this heatwave. Ass parked left. Not the right side but the right side. The correct side.

Jeongguk, slouched next to him, grunts.

“Sweat pouring down my ass crack like Niagra Falls or something,” Taehyung continues, spreading his legs even wider, right knee almost touching Jeongguk’s. He’s an overheated and miserable mess stripped down to just to his underwear, tan supple skin stretched over sharp collarbones. A golden colour that Jeongguk can’t now, can’t ever, live up to.

Jeongguk swallows. It’s been three days of this too.

Their apartment faces southwest, the temperature inside climbing all day long till it reaches this crescendo in the late afternoons when they get home. Taehyung first. Jeongguk half an hour to an hour later. Tonight, they’ll have to sleep naked again, shying away to opposite ends of the bed to avoid touching each other’s scalding skin.

“Fucking hate summers in the city.”

Jeongguk stays silent. Blinks slowly and watches Taehyung play a new game on his phone. It’s annoying how stupid he looks. Long hair stuck to his neck and forehead with sweat, eyes squinting at the screen, and tongue poking out between his lips as he tries to spark together his last 2 braincells not fried-out by the heat.

It’s annoying how sexy he makes stupid look.

Jeongguk twists his body slightly to the left, trying to obtain something resembling relief. Anything, really. Just a modicum of comfort or a short respite from how the leather sticks to his skin. He’s sitting on the right side of the couch, the wrong side of the couch, where the springs dig into the flesh of his thighs no matter how he positions himself and the breeze of their 10 year-old fan that Seokjin donated to them out of pity can’t reach.

The whirring of the fan follows Jeongguk everywhere he goes in the apartment. It’s with him in the living room as Taehyung plays his games and with him in the bedroom as they go to sleep. The whirring of the fan, the sweltering heat that coils itself tightly around everything in the apartment till it suffocates, and Taehyung’s presence. On the left side of the couch. The right side.

Three days.

Jeongguk lifts himself off the couch, leather peeling off his skin with a sound that haunts Jeongguk’s sweaty nightmares, and Taehyung barely tears his eyes away from his phone long enough to throw him a questioning glance. He should have looked a little longer.

There’s loud wheeze full of pain when Jeongguk drops his body into Taehyung’s lap like dead weight, phone clattering to the ground.

“Jesus, Jeongguk! Fuck!”

Jeongguk has always liked how deep Taehyung’s voice goes when he’s angry. His words bleeding all the different shades of red.

“You’re on my side of the couch,” Jeongguk says simply. Like it’s a real explanation.

“What the-!” Taehyung’s hands connect with his back hard enough for some of the air to escape him. “Get the fuck off me, Guk! It’s fucking 400 degrees in here!”

Digging both feet into the carpet, Jeongguk pushes all his weight back onto Taehyung, calf muscles burning. He’s not going anywhere. There’s a sick satisfaction at spreading the pain and grief this heatwave has been giving him. And Jeongguk has wanted to share everything with Taehyung since the time Taehyung took him out for their first date, wallet forgotten at home, and the owner made Jeongguk leave his silver bracelet behind as collateral while they scrounged up the funds. Apparently, misery is no exception.

Taehyung’s hands tighten painfully around Jeongguk’s waist and, for a second, Jeongguk’s scared Taehyung will be shitty in the way Jeongguk’s being shitty. That Taehyung will be shitty in a way all boys can be shitty and wrestle Jeongguk off until they probably crash through the coffee table and someone ends up with an elbow to the eye socket.

But then Jeongguk feels Taehyung’s body go limp behind him and his chest expand in a heavy sigh. No real fight in him when he’s this worn down by the beating sun outside.

“You’re such a cunt, y’know that.”

Jeongguk smirks; Taehyung’s right. It is hotter than Satan’s asshole in their living room. Taehyung’s a wall of almost unbearable heat against his back and Jeongguk feels the tin fabric of his top growing damp and uncomfortable with their combined sweat. Even the way the naked skin of their legs rub together is aggravating. But Jeongguk hasn’t felt this pleased in three days.

“Wanna sit this side of the couch,” Jeongguk says. Like it’s reasonable. And Taehyung does nothing but grumble softly in response.

In his new spot Jeongguk is closer to the windows. Outside he sees the blinding glare reflected of all the steel and glass that makes up the inner city. Pretty. Brutal. A massive magnifying glass scorching it’s inhabitants like ants. He can’t wait for the end of the heatwave to come. For darkness and rain. Taehyung and Jeongguk sharing hotteok under their windblown umbrella while the neon reflects up at them from the pools of water around their feet instead of sleeping on opposite sides of the bed.

“Guk,” Taehyung whines from behind, legs gently jostling Jeongguk. “You’re gonna give me heatstroke. Get off.”

Jeongguk huffs. He’s not done yet. There’s something simmering under his skin. He feels agitated, pent up, too hot to be this close to Taehyung but too restless to be alone. “Suck it up.”

Two vicious jabs between Jeongguk ribs, exactly where he’s ticklish, precisely where Taehyung knows he’s weak, and then Jeongguk’s dumped sideways in one well-placed shove.

Jeongguk glares up at Taehyung from his newfound place on the couch, one leg still draped over Taehyung’s lap, the other foot on the floor, Jeongguk’s back resting on the sharp springs. Even from this angle Taehyung looks good. In a way no person should really be allowed to. His head is tilted, long hair brushing past his cheekbones, and his strong eyebrows are scrunched up in irritation above dark eyes. Such a pleasant view.

“Whaddaya want, Guk?”

What does he want?

For this heatwave to stop. For the burning in his belly to give. For Taehyung’s hands on him. For Taehyung to…

“Touch me.”

Taehyung rolls his eyes, angrily mutters unbelievable under his breath, but he wraps one large hand around the thigh spread across his lap and Jeongguk feels something in him settle. “You get so moody when it’s hot.”

“You’re not exactly Mr. Sunshine either, shitbitch.”

“Cuz my boyfriend’s an asshole,” Taehyung counters, pinching the inside of Jeongguk’s thighs and making him jolt.

There are marks there. Old ones that, when Jeongguk pushes them in the shower, still throb. Marks that Taehyung left behind days ago before the city turned into an open-air oven and everything and everyone became too hot to the touch. Faded bruises peeking out from under the shorts that Taehyung is pushing higher up his leg till it’s bunched up at his groin.

“Better?” Taehyung asks. His grin is a little too sharp. A little vindictive. Jeongguk shudders.

“Y-yeah,” Jeongguk says, feeling Taehyung digging his fingertips deeper into old love bites. They burn. The air too hot in Jeongguk’s lungs and only getting hotter. Even this side of the couch. Not the right side but the right side. Taehyung’s side. “Better.”

-----------------------

@ghouliecruz I wrote more than 50 words. I’m going on another 2 year hiatus.

#taekook fanfic #taekook #jeongguk #taehyung #mirre writes #streetlightserenades

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lady-divine-writes · 5 years ago

Text

Husband, Guardian, Muse - Chapter 1/3 (Rated NC17)

Summary: After the untimely death of his husband and muse, Crowley tries to find the simplest, most foolproof way to join him. But in the days that follow, he discovers that sometimes what looks like an ending can turn out to be a beginning, and that no one is ever really gone if we find a way to remember them.

Notes: This was the piece I wrote for Celestial Harmonies Zine :) Go check it out. Human au. Warning for heavy angst, death, alcohol abuse and thoughts of suicide. But it does have a happy ending :)

Crowley hated working over his vacations.

Wasn’t the point of being a semi-famous artist that he got to make his own hours, work alone, and spend as much time at home with his husband as he wanted?

Not this time, apparently. Not since Alciston & Selmeston Village Hall decided to do a complete renovation, including replacing their hospitality-grade art with original work from local artists, he had been stuck in meetings and consultations all week while his husband occupied himself at their cottage.

Aziraphale said he didn’t mind since he was doing renovations of his own – a new work space for Crowley, an extension to his library, expanding the wine cellar. Being alone gave Aziraphale the opportunity to putter over fabric samples and color swatches in peace without his husband intervening every five minutes with his supposed “expert eye for nuance”.

But Crowley had enough of forgoing lunches with his husband (as well as afternoon delights) in favor of another discussion over whether or not a Monet-inspired acrylic of waterlilies would be appropriate for the treasurer’s office. He launched his escape when an argument over abstract sculptures for public spaces broke out. He grabbed a blank canvas under the guise of starting a new piece and slipped away in his Bentley. He hit the interstate and sped off like a bat out of hell, making it to their cottage in record time.

Crowley loved how secluded it was in their small patch of heaven. Tucked far and away from any other living souls, no one complained about their activities – amorous or otherwise - be it at three in the afternoon or three in the morning.

Crowley shed his jacket, his keys, and his phone at the front door, then he wandered the rooms, the canvas from earlier tucked beneath his arm, making as much noise as possible to alert his husband of his arrival.

“Aziraphale!” Crowley called, walking through the kitchen in search of his muse. “Aziraphale! Where are you, angel? I miss your ass!”

“I thought you had to work this afternoon.”

Crowley smiled. “I am working. I’m doing a portrait of a gorgeous man, as soon as I find him.”

“No …” Aziraphale chuckled. “You’re supposed to be doing a landscape for the city planner’s office.”

“No,” Crowley insisted, inspecting another empty room. “I’m painting you. Naked if I have my way.”

“You just want to snog,” Aziraphale teased.

“Nothin’ wrong with that. Now where are you? This cottage i’n’t that big.”

“Out here, installing the track lighting.”

Crowley turned the corner to the patio – a space they’d recently added to give Crowley a protected outdoor area to work. There was Aziraphale – his intrepid Aziraphale – braving their rickety, eighty-year-old ladder to install a row of lights. The chrome runner and bonnets gleamed in the midday sun, right in Aziraphale’s eyes, so he was installing them blind, his eyes shut against the reflected light, feeling around for the holes to put the screws in. Crowley winced when the ladder shivered beneath Aziraphale’s weight, but Aziraphale seemed oblivious, balancing precariously on his toes to screw the fixture to the wall.

Crowley put the canvas down and held the ladder secure beneath his husband. “I really wish you’d let me do that. Or wait till we buy a new ladder.”

Aziraphale looked down at Crowley with playful blue eyes. “This ladder is fine. Besides, I don’t have much more to do. It’ll only take a ---” Aziraphale leaned sideways. The ladder lurched. Luckily, Crowley reacted in time to keep Aziraphale from toppling head first into the retaining wall.

“Okay, that’s enough,” Crowley said, pulling on Aziraphale’s pant leg. “Get down now.”

“But I only have one screw left!”

That’s an understatement, Crowley thought bitterly in reference to the dozen or so times he’d asked Aziraphale to wait on this project. “I don’t care. Get your ass down off that ladder.”

“Geez,” Aziraphale huffed, carefully navigating the rungs. “You certainly have a fondness for my rear.”

“It happens to be a glorious rear.” Crowley grabbed Aziraphale’s behind and squeezed for emphasis. “I don’t want anything happening to it.” He drew Aziraphale close, relishing the way their bodies fit together, as if some higher power had carved them both from the same slab of stone.

Like they’d been made specifically for each other.

Aziraphale tilted his head, pouting in mock offense. “So, you only care about my rear?”

“Among other things.” Crowley captured Aziraphale’s lips, not waiting for an invitation, trying his best to kiss the pout from Aziraphale’s face.

If Aziraphale’s whimpers were any indication, Crowley was winning.

But Crowley’s cellphone, ringing where he’d left it, called a foul on his game. He had no intention of stopping, but Aziraphale annoyingly felt that job and responsibility came before snogging.

“You should get that,” he struggled to say, voice muffled by Crowley’s lips pressing insistently against his.

“Nope.”

“But it’s probably village hall, wondering where their artist is.”

Crowley frowned as his husband squirmed out of his arms while laughing at what Aziraphale called Crowley’s “sour mug”. Crowley narrowed his eyes at his husband.

“I’m going to go answer that, but just to tell them to get lost, and then I’m getting you naked.”

Crowley peppered Aziraphale’s cheeks with kisses to a symphony of his giggles. Then, with a heavy-handed swat to his backside, he reluctantly released his husband and ran inside to answer the phone.

Despite his frustration at having to put his escapades with his husband on hold, Crowley couldn’t help smiling. He loved his life. He loved his marriage. He especially loved the time they spent at their cottage in the South Downs. He’d always be a city dweller, but this place was paradise. He loved bringing his husband here and having him all to himself.

Crowley and Aziraphale had been blessed with a wonderful five-year-long honeymoon, and he didn’t see that ending anytime soon.

“Coming, coming,” he yelled at his insufferable phone, but he wasn’t exactly rushing to get it. By the time he reached it, it stopped ringing.

“Oh, no,” he joked. “I didn’t get here in time. Whatever shall I do?”

It didn’t matter to him anyway since no power on heaven or earth could have convinced him to leave his husband right as he was preparing to ravish him.

And to make sure they weren’t interrupted again, he turned his ringer off.

“Well, now that that’s settled …”

A sharp noise pricked at Crowley’s ears. Nothing too alarming. In fact, it could have been a bird chirping. But it filled him from head to toe with dread.

He didn’t know how he could possibly feel the ladder tilt from inside the cottage, but he felt the sway of it as if he was standing on it instead of Aziraphale. After a swoop of sudden and inexplicable nausea hit him, everything happened absurdly fast. He heard Aziraphale yelp, a loud metallic clatter, then a horrifying crack, like pottery hitting pavement.

“Aziraphale?” Crowley called, and then he waited. When his husband didn’t answer, he started to panic. “Aziraphale!” He ran for the patio, having the sense of mind to start dialing 9-9-9, knowing in his heart that his husband would need an ambulance. “Aziraphale! Are you alri---?”

Crowley got his answer the second he burst through the patio door.

No, Aziraphale wasn’t alright.

Aziraphale definitely wasn’t alright.

***

It rained the day they buried Aziraphale.

This weather was such a marked change from the weeks of sunny skies and no clouds. Aziraphale had mentioned how they needed a good, all-day rainstorm to trap them indoors where they could snuggle together on the sofa with mugs of cocoa and listen to the drops fall. Aziraphale was a quintessential pluviophile. He found peace in the rain.

Crowley hated the rain. He hated getting wet. He hated when his soaked clothes stuck to his skin and cold water ran into his socks. He hated sloshing inside his shoes, and the way they never completely dried. But as much as he hated the rain, he loved Aziraphale, and the rain made Aziraphale happy.

So Crowley became a pluviophile for Aziraphale.

Crowley stood by Aziraphale’s casket beside his open grave and waited in the rain. He waited while the mourners paid their respects. He waited while everyone hugged and cried. He waited until the final mourner wandered somberly away. He waited until they lowered Aziraphale into the ground, and even after there was nothing left to witness, he waited until nightfall, when the rain stopped, the clouds parted, and the stars came out.

Crowley had painted stars hundreds of times. They were one of his favorite subjects to paint.

Now, he didn’t want to look at them.

Tracy, one of Aziraphale’s dearest friends, and her husband Sergeant Shadwell, returned to the cemetery a little before midnight in search of their missing friend, convince him to go home, but Crowley refused to leave. So they waited with him, not pressing the issue even though Crowley was sopping wet and stifling sniffles he knew would bloom into a full-blown cold later on.

At some point, Crowley finally came to the conclusion that Aziraphale wasn’t going to magically return, so he took Tracy’s hand and let himself be led away from his husband’s final resting place. Crowley’s forehead burned with fever by the time the couple got him back to the cottage, but Crowley turned down Tracy’s offer to stay. As much as Tracy objected, in the end, she didn’t have the strength to battle her own grief and Crowley’s, and they left the man alone.

Crowley walked through the unlit cottage, straight out back to the patio, shoving aside a morbid sense of déjà vu. He dropped heavily into a wicker chaise and looked up at the clear night sky, but his vision was obscured by something shiny hanging a few feet above his head.

The light fixture.

That stupid track lighting.

Crowley stared at it in shock as it dangled on its two screws.

The fixture was there, brand new out-of-the-box, installed except for one damn screw, but because of it, Aziraphale was dead.

Crowley snapped.

He spotted an abandoned hoe over by the retaining wall, a few feet from where Aziraphale had fallen. He grabbed it and, with a renewed vigor, attacked the lights.

“Goddamned lights!” he screamed. “What the fuck did we need these for, Aziraphale? Why did you have to put them up when I asked you to wait!? Why didn’t you wait, Aziraphale!? Why couldn’t you just sit on your ass and fucking wait!?”

The sound of the hoe hitting the lights and the brick behind it echoed. The force of the blows caused the hoe to vibrate painfully in Crowley’s hands, but he only tightened his grip and struck harder.

“Fuck you, Aziraphale! Why did you have to put up these stupid lights!?” Crowley screamed, shattering the bulbs and sending a spray of glass falling over his hair and clothes. “I told you to wait! I told you I’d do it! I don’t need the lights, Aziraphale! I need you, Aziraphale!”

He pounded the bonnets flat, chipped away a good portion of the brick wall, but it didn’t make him feel better. He didn’t feel avenged. He could pick those lights apart piece by piece, chop them up until they became dust, but that wouldn’t bring his husband back. And why was he taking out his anger on the lights? He should turn that hoe on himself. Why the fuck hadn’t he held the ladder till Aziraphale finished? He knew how stubborn his husband was, how determined he’d be to finish something he’d started. Why didn’t he take Aziraphale’s place and screw in the lights himself, get it over and done with once and for all? Those lights didn’t kill his husband, nor the ladder. And it wasn’t Aziraphale.

It was Crowley.

He was the only one to blame.

Panting hard and with blistered palms, he dropped the hoe on the ground at his feet.

He’s the one. He did this. He killed his husband.

He destroyed his muse.

He stumbled into the cottage and rifled through the cabinets, searching for a fresh bottle of whiskey. He couldn’t stand being sober any longer. His hand came in contact with a bottle that felt mostly full. He grabbed it and pulled it down. Except this bottle wasn’t his spare bottle of Jack.

It was a lone bottle of Hennessy … and it had belonged to Aziraphale.

Crowley’s first instinct was to toss the bottle up against the wall and smash it. He looked around for an open space to hurl it when he caught sight of his paintings - a new crop he had started working on for a show in the fall, all of them featuring his muse.

Aziraphale.

Crowley hadn’t set them up in here. Aziraphale had. He was so proud of them, he’d displayed them. That way he could look at them while Crowley toiled down at the village hall, wasting his talents painting hillsides and sunsets.

But Crowley couldn’t look at them. They represented everything he’d had and lost in an instant. Being in their presence made him realize that he couldn’t go on this way. He couldn’t keep being the artist he was when the only subject he enjoyed painting was gone.

He didn’t want to keep existing when the only man he’d ever loved was dead.

He took a swig of the Hennessy to steady his nerves. With his body burning hot and fire in his veins, he grabbed up the paintings, every last one, and carried them outside, dropping them in an undignified pile on a patch of bare earth a distance from the cottage. He doused them with the cognac, gritting his teeth as the liquid assaulted the paint, causing it to bleed, distorting Aziraphale’s face, twisting it, like Aziraphale’s body would eventually be, decaying inside his coffin.

When the bottle was just about empty, he rummaged through his pockets for his silver Zippo. He didn’t smoke, but he liked keeping a lighter on hand for emergencies. And why carry around a common plastic BIC when he could spend over a hundred dollars on something he only used once or twice a year? But that was the man Crowley was.

Frivolous.

Over-the-top.

Who in their right mind chooses to make a living as an artist anyway? He didn’t even want to be a painter initially. But when his trust fund matured and he gained control of it, he realized that he had more than enough money to live the life of a rock star and never work a day in his life. On a whim, he began to dally with watercolors and voila! He unlocked a secret talent.

But he should have done something respectable - gone to law school, or medical school. If he’d done either of those, Aziraphale might still be alive.

He’d give it all away, call a complete do over on his life, to get Aziraphale back.

He flipped the lighter open and an orange flame sprang to life. Crowley tossed the lighter into the pile. The flame barely touched the heap before the whole thing went up in a blaze. Crowley stood back and watched it burn, watched the past three months of his life go up in smoke. The paint melted, the canvas crackled, sparks of color went flying into the sky.

“There, Aziraphale,” Crowley grumbled, his throat raw from screaming. “It’s done. All of it. No more muse … no more you … no more paintings. I’ve buried it all with you. I’m done!”

Weak, tired, and sick, Crowley drank the dregs of Aziraphale’s cognac while fire devoured his paintings … and the love of his life.

It seemed too much work to trudge back to the cottage and climb into bed, so he lay down on the hard-packed earth next to the destroyed canvases. They maintained a slow burn, the air around him reeking of chemical smoke. Crowley hoped it would seep into his sinuses and suffocate his brain. Or maybe an errant cinder would jump onto his alcohol-soaked clothes and he would burn to death in his sleep; a sudden temperature drop freeze him to the ground where he lay. Either way, without Aziraphale, his bed wasn’t his bed, his home wasn’t a home, and Crowley wished more than anything that he could find the quickest and most efficient way to die.

Crowley had prayed that he would black out, surrender to an unconsciousness where time passed outside of memory, but he had no such luck. Locked inside sleep, he had the same dream over and over - Aziraphale falling from the ladder and cracking his head on the wall. And no matter what Crowley did, no matter how fast he ran, no matter if he didn’t go into the cottage to answer the phone, Aziraphale still died.

That was an absolute. It never changed.

Which meant that doctor, lawyer, or artist, Aziraphale would still die.

Before dawn, Crowley had no idea when, he heard a rustle, followed by footfalls on the ground, and he wrestled through the fog in his brain to open his eyes. If he was about to be mauled by wild animals, he wanted to know. But what he saw was a man – a beautiful man - approaching the charred pile, focused on it as if a sick, drunk, and urine-smelling Crowley wasn’t lying mere feet away. The man bent over the burnt canvases, a trembling hand pressed to his lips, and a gasp escaped his mouth.

Crowley had an overwhelming urge to reach out to the man, apologize for setting the paintings on fire, but why, he couldn’t explain. Crowley groaned, trying to form words with his sticky tongue. He rolled slightly, blinking to get a better look at his paintings’ solitary mourner, but when he opened his eyes, the man was gone, and Crowley fell asleep once again.

Crowley awoke after sunrise to the sound of laughter breaking through the haze of his fever-induced stupor. It was high-pitched, familiar. It sounded like heaven and home and the future Crowley had always dreamed of having, starting during those days when Aziraphale was completely clueless that Crowley had a crush on him. He could punch himself in the eye for the time he’d wasted not outright saying, “Aziraphale, I’m in love with you!”

Time he could use now.

Time he would never get back.

Back then, it took him longer than necessary to realize what he’d known from the beginning, from the first moment they met.

He wanted Aziraphale. Just Aziraphale.

Crowley peeled open his eyes and craned his head in search of the laughter, fixing his gaze on the cottage, and the patio he planned to tear out brick by brick by hand as soon as he was physically able. Somewhere in the midst of his pounding headache and the fog that refused to lift, he spotted piercing blue eyes – blue like the sky in summer – staring at him from behind a golden hibiscus. It was that exact spot Crowley had planned for his painting - the one he’d rushed home to start, of Aziraphale lounging on a chaise in front of the outdoor fireplace, the hibiscus behind him, its golden hue mimicking the highlights in his hair.

Crowley sat up too quickly to see who the eyes belonged to. His head swam, his stomach flipped, and before he knew it, he was on his hands and knees, vomiting over the ground. Crowley heaved until there was nothing left, eyes squeezed shut as his body wrung the past several hours’ worth of alcohol from him. As quickly as he could, he looked back at the cottage with watery eyes, but this time, he saw nothing. He dropped his head. It felt too heavy for his neck so he let it hang while he blinked what remained of his tears from his eyes. He caught a glimpse of his hands, filthy and paint-stained; the ruined cuffs of his suit reminding him that he still wore it. He pictured himself covered in dirt and vomit and knew that if Aziraphale could see him, he would be sorely disappointed.

Slowly, ever so slowly, with that thought lodged in his mind giving him an impetus to move, he crawled back to the cottage on his hands and knees. He felt lousy with fever, but his head began to clear. Small pebbles cut into the palms of his hands, but, unable to get to his feet, he continued to crawl, distracting himself by considering his options.

By the time he made it to the patio, his path seemed certain.

Crowley didn’t want to live, not without Aziraphale. His mind was made up.

He would settle his affairs.

He would finish his commissions, complete his obligations.

And when the cottage and his flat were put up on the market, and all was said and done, he would find the quickest, most foolproof way of being reunited with his husband again.

#good omens #good omens fanfiction #ineffable husbands #anthony j crowley #aziraphale #aziraphale x crowley #crowley x aziraphale

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