#it started out with a hickey how did we mess up so quickly

[1800jjbarnes]

𝐓𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞 𝐈𝐬 𝐁𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫 | 𝐒𝐭𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐲 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

【Synopsis】 : You suggest something new, and the boys love the idea.

『Word count』 : 2.1k 

Paring: Steve x Bucky x Reader [Poly Au] 

[Warnings] : Making out. Hickeys. Big dick energy. Light-hearted sex. Poly relationship. Swearing. Pet names. Praise from Bucky. Steve is a moaning mess. Multiple orgasms. Protected anal sex. Unprotected sex (Steve didn't wrap it).

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"Please, please. Please." You sounded like a broken record. One that had been broken by none other than the infamous lone wolf Bucky and his best friend, Steve. You were the good girl around the compoud. You weren't the best agent by all means, but you weren't an unskilled either. You had friends in and out of the heroing and crime fighting. You try to live a normal life.... well, that was until Bucky, the deep-voiced man that recently joined the Avengers, started to take interest in you.

Everyone wanted him and his best friends. They were the walking sex on legs. But none of them were interested in relationships or flings or even hookups. Especially with the women and some men shield agnets that only started working for the avengers because they wanted to get closer to them. People would lie, saying they'd been with them, but in truth, Bucky and Steve were untouchable, and that made them even more desirable. Heck, Bucky didn't even like human interaction with anyone other than their friend group. But yet when Bucky saw you, he knew he wanted you. And so did Steve.

It became a game of cat and mouse. But in this case, it was two very, very large cats cornering one scared little mouse. You wanted it, though. As much as you fought it at first. You wanted the pleasure you knew they would provide. But part of you wanted to keep your dignity, not wanted to be plastered as a whore in the compound. But Bucky and Steve reassured you that no one would come to know your dirty secret. And yet, no one would even believe it anyway if it were to get out.

So here you stand, with two large bodies holding you close in between them. Steve's fingers were paced fast as you high came, ripping closer and closer. Bucky's tongue lapped the bright purple marks on your soft skin, the ones he created so he could show others you were taken without anyone knowing who exactly gave them to you. They were both possessive over you. Learning more and more things about you and your body every time they had you in these situations.

"Steve , I.." You gripped his biceps, nails digging into his flesh as you could feel your orgasm approaching. Steve just chuckled, going faster while Bucky snaked his hand from behind you to place a finger on your clit, circling it quickly in time with Steve's thrusts.

"Fuck fuck fuck.." you swore, knees buckling, you fall into Bucky's arms, making him keep you up while they continue. Your orgasm comes quickly, Steve letting out a chuckle at his work. You were so fucked out already and they hadn't even started yet. Bucky swopped you up, laying you on his bed while Steve takes this time to undress, finally making you not the only one naked in the room. Bucky kisses your forehead whispering how good you were, making your heart jump at his words.

“Bucky.” You shakily place a hand on his cheek, bringing him close so you could kiss him on the lips passionately. Buck’s hands snaked down your body, gripping your breast, giving them a squeeze. You moan into his mouth, making him smile. The noises you made were always music to his ears.

“So Me or Buckaroo first, baby? Since we chose last time.” Steve rubbed your ankles as he stood by the end of the bed. You sat up, looking at your lover. A hard gulp ran down your throat as you tried to prepare yourself to answer him. You recently found you wanted to try a new thing but became unsure how to ask. No better time than the present, right?

“I…I want both of you..” You glance over to Bucky, “At the same time.” Steve and Bucky could feel their dicks twitch at the idea. don’t get them wrong, they both fantasised about taking you at the same time but they didn’t want to scare you away with the act. But hearing the thought roll off your tongue, god it made them go feral. Bucky jumped up, ripping his shirt off while he jogged over to his dresser.

“Rock, paper, scissors,” Steve shouted with a huge smile like a teenager. You tilted your head in confusion as you watched Bucky strip down while he held his fist out.

“Deal.” Bucky smirks, throwing the lube on the bed next to you before also placing his fist out. They swung, Steve getting scissors, and Bucky getting rock.

“Fuck!” Steve swears with a whimpering tone. Bucky laughs smugly, walking over to you with pride. He lets his hand out for you to take, so he can pull you up off the bed so you could stand on your wobbly legs. Did they really just play rock, paper, scissors for who fucks you in which hol-

“Oh god….” Your cheeks run a blush in a similar shade to the evening sky. Bucky twirls you, so you face Steve, and he could stand behind you. He kisses your neck from behind, rubbing your ass slightly before letting his hand land a smack on your soft skin.

“Next time, Stevie. But right now, this ass is mine.” Bucky chuckles to himself.

He lathers himself up with lube and then coats his fingers again. With one finger, he begins prodding at your ass before slipping it in slowly. It’s a foreign feeling, and it has you squirming under his touch. He murmurs something in your ear you can’t quite make out, but it’s all a blur anyways when he begins sucking at your neck. He adds another finger, and he has to hold you in place. It’s almost painful, but the lube is a blessing.

Steve is suddenly in your sight, grabbing your chin to look at him. “Keep your eyes on me, I wanna see your face.”

Steve cups your core, chuckling slightly at how wet you still were... He’s able to slip two fingers in easily, and the noise that comes from your lips is something that you wouldn’t imagine. They go at two different paces, and you can’t think. You forget that you’re meant to be looking at Steve, and you focus on him again. Bucky has to hold you up as your knees keep wanting to give way. You have never felt this much before in your life.

“I...I feel weird..” The tingle in your gut was growing differently than any other orgasms you’ve ever experienced before. You lent more into Bucky's body, while Steve got down on his knees so he could be face to face with your dripping pussy. His tongue licks a long strip, making you gasp out, gripping his short hair. His fingers got faster while Bucky stayed at the same pace, making your brain shortcircuit. Before you could tell what was going on, you were cumming all over Steve’s face.

“Fuck, our baby just squirted,” Steve said in amusement while Bucky chuckled against your ear, making you blush even more than you were prior. They both pulled out making you whine. You left dizzy, unable to register what was happening. All you could do was watch Steve disappear for a second before reappearing with a towel, wiping his face clean with a smug smile plastered to it. You could hear the sound of a wrapper being opened behind you. You glanced over your shoulder, seeing Bucky rolling a condom on his thick length. He had a sweet smile, but you knew this man had a dark side. He was going to enjoy ruining you.

“Okay, Stevie, lay back and let our baby ride you.” Steve does what Bucky asks, laying down on the bed so you can straddle his hips. You guide his cock to your entrance and sink down on him, watching his face contort as you squeeze his length. He fills you perfectly, hitting spots inside you that make you see stars. Fuck, you swear every time you feel his cock it gets bigger. From behind, you suddenly feel Bucky’s fingers, slick from the lube, slide against your ass like he had done before. You shiver at the feeling but welcome it, angling your hips so he has better access.

“You feel so perfect squeezing me,” Steve moans from below you, hands reaching out to grope your breasts in order to distract you from the discomfort you might feel soon enough.

“Isn’t she tight, Stevie. Always so good for us ?” Bucky grins, pressing a finger into your ass. You hold your breath at the feeling, but Steve just whispers calming words to you. You relax into them as Buck slowly moves his finger. One finger becomes two, and you ride Steve a bit harder as you warm up to the feeling. He grips your hips and guides you on his large cock, working the pleasure from you.

“Please, James, please,” you beg, leaning back up against his chest. He kisses your neck and smiles at your neediness.

“You ready for me, Doll?” he teases, thrusting his fingers at a quicker pace.

“Fuck yes, Bucky, I need you so bad.” Bucky pulls you into a bruising kiss as he removes his fingers and replaces them with the tip of his cock.

“You’re doing so good for us, baby. Now be a good girl and take a deep breath.” Bucky keeps kissing you as he presses his cock further and further inside of you. Steve helps you relax, but you can tell it’s difficult for him, too. His strokes are getting messy as you get tighter around him. His release came quicker than he expected. Only a thin wall now separates Bucky and Steve’s cocks, and that just turns them on even more. It turns you on even more.

They pump into you simultaneously, finding the perfect rhythm that makes your heart stutter. You’re at mercy to them, putty in their hands while their thrusts become different pacing, making it near hard to breathe.  All you can do is moan and beg, your brain becoming jelly the harder they fuck you. With their stamina, they last so much longer than other men. I guess the serm could be a blessing in some situations. They bring you to orgasm after orgasm, pleasing you seems to be their only goal.

“I’m gonna come,” Steve whimpers from below you, fingers digging into your hips with bruising force. “Please, I’m gonna come.” Bucky leans over to bite your shoulder, pumping into your ass with deeper strokes than ever.

“You gonna cum Doll? You want Stevie to cum inside you?” Bucky’s fingers wrap around your neck, giving it a tight squeeze.

“Oh my god, Stevie, please give it to me. Please come inside me,” you moan through your strong high, gripping onto Bucks’s metal arm. Steve comes on a long, drawn-out moan, sending Bucky over the edge right after. He thrusts into you a few more times before he becomes too sensitive, and then they’re both pulling out.

The three of you fall into a heap on the bed, panting and sweating for a moment. Bucky kisses you deeply before shifting to give Stevw the same treatment. Buck gets up to grab a washcloth while Steve holds you tightly, pampering your face with sweet kisses. They take care of you sweetly. Ensuring not to irritate your sensitive skin, Bucky cleans you up, and together, you and Steve care for Bucky. Once you are all done, you flop on the bed with Bucky on his back and you half on top of him. Steve cuddles up next to you, wrapping his arms around your waist while nuzzling his face into your shoulder. it was silent for a moment. The only things that could be heard were your bumping hearts and breathing that finally began to slow down. It was peaceful until Steve opened his big, smug mouth.

“Ready for round two?”

You have never wanted to slap him so much as right now.

[gatorbites-imagines]

Kinktober day 27

Bruce Wayne + cock cages

Schools killing me, I am so tired rn 👍

Kinktober 2023 masterlist

Bruce stood amongst the many attendees of whatever Gala it was he was taking part in. It was one of many he had to attend during this time of year, so many people to greet and so many hands to shake, as surface level conversations passed from person to person, in some weak attempt at comradery.

But only about half his mind was on the Gala and people around him, instead he was more deeply focused on the metal constraint weighing on his crotch. You two hadn’t seen each other for a few weeks, both busy with your work, as heroes and during the day.

Bruce wasn’t sure what had come over him, but around halfway through the third week he had started sending you pictures and texts that he knew would get in trouble, but he couldn’t help himself. From pictures of him in just his tight black briefs, to him in even less splayed out on the deep red silk sheets of his bed. Every picture he took was planned and posed just right, showing off just what he knew got you going.

It awoke some giddy almost bratty part of him when you texted him back warning him about punishment, part of himself that Bruce thought didn’t exist anymore at his older age, but you lived to prove him wrong. When you finally reunited again, you gripped onto his shirt and pulled him to his bedroom, Bruce almost stumbling along after you as excitement and arousal bubbled in his gut.

But as you kissed and licked and bit, never once did you actually grab his cock. Even as you sat him in your lap and pinched and twisted at his nipples, or sucked hickeys on his thick pecs, even as he groaned and whined, his hips lifting off the bed in search of any semblance of friction.

Instead, you just kept teasing him until he was a dripping wet mess, the crotch of his boxers and slacks wet and sticky to the touch. But in the end, you didn’t bring him any type of completion, just laying down on the bed beside him and pulling out your phone, scrolling through different work emails or notifications.

Bruce found himself feeling almost wild as he scrambled into your lap, trying to gain your attention as he gripped onto your chest, his blue eyes misty and lip red from all the biting he had done to it. As he tried to grind against you, you wound your arm around him and pulled him down against you, letting out a displeased noise that had him going slack almost immediately.

This kept up for a few more days, you teasing him and kissing him, but never touching him where he wanted you the most. The closest Bruce got to it was when you pressed up against his back and rolled your hips into his ass as he was working on the batcomputer, but the touch was gone as quickly as it came, leaving him aching even more than before.

The lead to this night, as he stood getting ready for yet another gala he had to attend. As he did his tie, you came up behind him and wound your arms around his waist, the small touch almost having Bruce keening and buckling at the knees from the gut burning need he had for you and your touch.

“I have a way we can end this little game, what do you say?” you mutter against his neck, Bruce finding himself nodding before he even heard what you had to say. But it had been weeks apart, and now almost a week of you teasing him any chance you got. He knew it was his own fault for teasing and sending those pictures, but just the thought of going another day almost had him in tears.

That’s how he found himself on the bed, an ice-cold rag on his hard cock as you dug through the drawers beside your shared bed. Bruce had gasped as you placed the rag on his dick, but the metallic clinks of the item you were messing with made it obvious what you had in mind. Bruce found himself gulping nervously as he caught sight of the cage, made of stainless steel and custom made for his specific size and needs.

His legs shivered as you removed the rag and got to work securing the cage around his cock, the coldness keeping him from getting hard immediately again, and when he could feel the heat returning the padlock of the cage snapped shut. Bruce exhaled shakily as you wound the kay around your neck, placing an almost loving kiss against his tip through the cage.

He twitched and gasped as you patted his caged cock a few times as you got to your feet, the grin on your face a little cocky as you watched Batman himself writhing against the sheets. “Come on Love, we have a gala to go to” your voice as thick with want yet teasing as you stepped away from him, moving to get dressed up yourself.

Bruce needed a moment before he shakily got to his feet, tucking on the clothes needed. It was only experience that kept it hidden that he wasn’t feeling as even footed as usual, but your hand on his lower back kept him steady, even when your thumb rubbing against his lower back had him shiver softly.

Through the whole night he could feel his cock ache against the bars of his cage, trying again and again to get hard as the smallest touch from you set his senses alight. But no matter how hard he tried, it was impossible, and he could almost had cried as you finally left the Gala together.

As you got into the drivers’ seat of the car, Bruce took his spot in the passenger side, his hips softly rocking against his own wishes like his body just couldn’t take it anymore. A soft chuckle left you as you placed a hand on his thigh, your hand dangerously close to his still locked up cock as you drove back towards the manor, soft mutters of praise leaving you as Bruce tried to keep himself presentable. He knew from your praise that he had done good, he could only hope you would keep up your promise and finally touch him, whenever you decided to take off the cage, that was.

[barcaatthemoon]

good morning || ingrid engen x reader ||

you're not a morning person, but ingrid tries to make an early morning easier on you.

you had never been one for an early wake up. even whenever ingrid let you sleep in, things weren't exactly easy. luckily, ingrid had been around you, both as a friend and your girlfriend, to know exactly how to make waking up easier for the both of you. admittedly, it was easier now that the two of you were together and ingrid had learned the quickest possible way to get you out of a bad mood.

"morning eskling," ingrid said softly. she was always careful to speak soft and quiet to you in the morning. ingrid noticed the way that you whined and tried to turn onto your stomach to get away from her. "come on, we need to get up."

"no," you grumbled. ingrid smiled to herself at the way your accent really shone through whenever you were tired. you tried to get away from her, but ingrid leaned over to press kisses to your cheek. she was peppering every bit of your face and neck in kisses, only stopping when you turned over to lay on your back. "all that and you won't give me a real kiss?"

"come on, let's get up and then i'll give you more kisses than you'll know what to do with," ingrid promised you. you were pouting the entire time, but you did follow ingrid out of bed and into the bathroom for your morning routine. she moved much quicker than you, which really just meant that by the time you got to the kitchen, she had two of your pre-prepped breakfast bowls and cups of coffee ready.

"you're a godsend." you sat down at the bar and immediately dug into your food. ingrid smiled as she sipped on her coffee and watched you. she didn't understand how you consistently ate like you were starving. it didn't matter what time of day it was or how much food you had, you ate the same way every single time. it had been a pretty big point of teasing for a lot of your teammates at various clubs. "ahem, my kisses."

"not when you've got yogurt all over half your face," ingrid teased. you pulled the inside of your shirt up to wipe away the bottom of your face. ingrid sighed as she leaned in, finally giving you what you wanted. "i swear you're like a toddler sometimes."

"i was much worse as a toddler, just ask my mami or ona. apparently i used to have quite the biting problem," you told her. ingrid believed it, she had never been with someone who was as keen on marking your territory with hickeys as you were. she thought it was some ridiculous possessive bullshit, but you were the least jealous person that she had ever met.

"you do realize that you'll probably need to go take a shower before we go to training now, right?" ingrid asked as she watched you spill a bit of your coffee on yourself. you were almost always a complete mess in the morning. you quickly downed the rest of your coffee and put your dishes into the sink before you raced off into the bathroom.

ingrid patiently waited for you to get out of the shower. you looked a lot more awake than you had been just moments before, but she could still see how tired you were. ingrid felt bad for making you get up so early, but the two of you had a long day ahead of yourself. the call time for training had been moved up hours ahead to allow for everybody who had resigned or signed for the first time to get their picture taken before the actual practice commenced.

"ingrid?" you called out as you sat down in the passenger's seat.

"yes, eskling," ingrid answered. you pouted at her, and she knew what you wanted before you even asked.

"can i have another kiss or like, five?" you asked. ingrid chuckled as she leaned over the console and pulled you in for a kiss. the first couple were nothing more than quick pecks, but you managed to hold her in for the third one. after that, ingrid gave you one more quick peck. you pouted as she started to pull away, which was when you felt her press one last kiss to your lips.

this one was the kiss to really wake you up. she squeezed your jaw a little, just enough for you to open your mouth. her tongue slipped past your lips, licking into your mouth several times as the hand on your jaw migrated down to your neck. ingrid squeezed gently, causing you to gasp into her mouth. you were definitely in a bit of a haze whenever ingrid really pulled away this time to pull out of her parking spot.

"i love you," you mumbled as you rested your head against the headrest and looked at her. ingrid placed one of her hands on your knee, squeezing gently as she smiled over at you.

"i love you too," ingrid told you. your heart fluttered in your chest at her words, something that you didn't think you'd ever get over. you could hear her tell you that she loved you a million times and it would never lose its magic.

[hwaslayer]

home (khj) | one shot.

—summary: when your home no longer feels like home.

—pairing: kim hongjoong x f!reader

—genre: (18+ - minors dni) established relationship au | fluff, smut, heavy angst

—word count: 24k

—content/warnings: *open-ended, sad ending* cussing/mature language, very platonic cuddling and biting btwn oc and bff lol, alcohol consumption, marijuana use, intoxication, house party scenes, club scenes, making out, protected/unprotected sex, hongjoong’s pull out game on 100, marking/hickeys, thumb sucking, slight choking, breast play, clit play, fingering, oral (f. receiving), multiple orgasms, praising, car sex, *toxic relationship themes (hints of infidelity, gaslighting/manipulation, jealousy, anxiety, bad temper, multiple heartbreaks, crying, yelling/loud arguing, friends getting involved during fights) - please proceed with caution*

—on rotation: change - arin ray & kehlani ・burn - usher ・snooze (acoustic vers) - sza & justin bieber ・ i wish i hated you - ariana grande

Home.

When you think of the word home, plenty of things come to mind: your family, fun times in the backyard with the grill going, home-cooked meals, the smell of the fresh tree and peppermint during Christmas time;

Hongjoong.

It’s been a little over 2 years since Hongjoong has made a home in your heart and continues to— him being your other half and knowing you like the back of his hand. Things started off so beautifully, blossoming into the greatest love you’ve ever known. You remember the day you met him like it was yesterday, remembering every single detail down to the weather, where you were at, how you were feeling at that exact moment;

The excitement, the infatuation, the thrill, the chase.

As beautifully as those moments blossomed, there were other moments that came crashing down, too.

So when you think of the word home, plenty of other things come to mind: loud arguments and hurtful words, doors being slammed, glass hitting the wall, crying till the point your chest hurts;

Hongjoong.

—LATE JUNIOR YEAR IN COLLEGE

“Dude!” Wooyoung runs over to your circle of friends, pushing through the crowd that’s currently in Changbin’s living room. “Cops are outside, we gotta go!”

“What do you mean we gotta go, Woo? We took a fucking uber—”

“Shut it down! Now!” You hear the cops at Changbin’s door, urging for the party to be shut down immediately due to multiple complaints from neighbors for being too loud and disturbing the peace. Quite frankly, it was past 1am and Changbin still had his dj playing music. On top of that, people were outside constantly yelling during rounds of beer pong and being a mess, even down on the sidewalk.

You couldn’t say you were surprised.

However, you are surprised with how fast Wooyoung is booking it. You don’t even know where your other friends are at, or where he’s even going. 

“Jung Wooyoung, what the fuck! Where are we going?” You continue to run past him, barely able to catch up especially while drunk.

“This way!” He cuts through the backyard, down the alley and towards a random car you truly don’t recognize.

“Whose car is that?! Wooyoung!” You call for him, but he hops in anyway, dragging you along with him. Everything happens way too fast, you don’t even realize you’re smushed in the backseat of a mini SUV, sitting on someone’s lap. Everyone in the car is loud, the music is loud, the driver is no other than Jeong Yunho—

“Yunho?” You furrow your brows as you peek over the passenger’s seat, quickly glancing down at the unfamiliar individual sitting there. “When did you drive to the party?! Whose car is this?!” You look over to see another unfamiliar individual plopped in the left seat, with Wooyoung in the middle— your friend Ara on said unfamiliar’s lap.

“I told you at lunch that I was driving and asked if you two needed a ride. It’s my cousin’s.” He laughs. “He’s out of town and left the car with us. Told me I could use it if I wanted to. Just make sure no one fucking yacks or else I’m tossing you out. No question.”

“You did not!” You reply to the part where he claims he told you. He probably did, but you can’t remember for the life of you.

“Sure did. You were too busy arguing or whatever with Bin.” Hm, sounds about right, you think. Yunho looks at the rearview mirror to meet your eyes before shifting back to the road. “By the way, this is Mingi. That’s San. And dude you're sitting on is—.” 

“Hongjoong.” You look behind you and see Hongjoong giving you a small smile just as he says his name. His hands are awkwardly at his sides, rosy tint coloring the surface of his cheeks as he tries to keep still as much as possible.

“I’m.. so sorry about all of this.” You tell him as you hang onto the headrest in front of you, apologizing to Mingi when your fingers accidentally tug on a hair strand.

“All good.” Hongjoong chuckles, a little unsure of what to do with himself. He’s only met you about a couple of minutes ago, and you’re already on his lap. How sway?

“I saw Yunho while I was trying to find an easy way out and he called for me to follow him, so..” Wooyoung says, but your eyes quickly divert to one of your friends who had been gone the entire night.

“Ara, where have you even been all night?” You tap her arm. 

“Around.” She giggles, enjoying herself on San’s lap. They continue to talk amongst each other, and it’s clear where she’s been all night. Welp, as long as she’s happy, and as long as you all are out of trouble’s way.

“Shit, sorry.” Yunho says, abruptly braking. 

“Jesus fucking christ, Jeong Yunho.” You put your hand out to stop yourself from crashing into the headrest, another pair of arms suddenly wrapping around your waist to keep you steady. 

“Woah there. You good?” Hongjoong still has his arms wrapped around your waist, and you can’t help but shyly nod. You are too drunk for this.

“I wasn’t gonna make it! Sorry!” He points at the yellow light.

“You would’ve made it.” Mingi laughs.

“What would you know, you’re high as shit.” Yunho sighs. “Never being DD again with my cousin’s car. For real. I got somebody high in the front seat and 5 people in the back seat.” He looks around while he patiently waits for the light to turn. “Good thing it’s kinda dead out here.” Yunho quickly turns. “Anywhere we can hang out for a bit?”

“You can go to mine, my roommate is gone for the weekend.”

“You sure?” You nod.

“Yeah. Thanks for driving and letting us squish in here.” You give Yunho a small smile. “We can order some food when we get to my place.”

“Sick.” Yunho presses on the gas, driving at a safe speed down to your apartment. You learn that San, Mingi and Hongjoong go to the neighboring university, but they’ve known Yunho since middle school. For a minute, you forget you’re sitting on Hongjoong’s lap with how comfortable you’ve gotten, conversing with your friends as Yunho continues to drive to the apartment. And Hongjoong doesn’t mind either; hell, he’s forgotten about the entire situation, his hands resting on your thighs. If anything, he’s determined it could help in case Yunho decides to do a hard-brake again. You don’t seem to be uncomfortable and that’s all that matters.

So, all is well and Yunho brings everyone to the apartment in one piece. You immediately hop off of Hongjoong’s lap and quickly thank him for tonight before taking the lead with Wooyoung to your apartment door. Everyone else trails behind at their own speed, with Hongjoong digging his hands into his pockets while he observes you and Wooyoung loudly laughing at your door. You’ve got your arm linked with his as you both crack jokes and playfully bicker. At one point, Wooyoung bites your shoulder, causing you to yelp in pain and push him off. It’s an interesting relationship, he thinks. He’s never seen people be so close and comfortable, but he supposes it’s nice that you two are able to be that way.

“Get comfortable!” You say as everyone finally makes their way inside, kicking their shoes off to the side. “Water is in the fridge, along with other drinks. Feel free to grab anything.”

“Should we order some pizza and chicken?” Yunho is already scrolling through his phone. “That sounds bomb right now.”

“Yeah, that does. Order it and let us know how much we should chip in.” Wooyoung plops onto the floor, grabbing your remote off of the coffee table. “Dude, it’s still pretty early.”

“This is early to you?” 

“The night is very much still young, my dear.” He says, pinching your cheeks. You smack his hand away before yawning into your own hands, excusing yourself to the bathroom to change and get comfy while everyone gets situated around the living room. Wooyoung throws on a random scary movie for some source of entertainment, some source of background noise. You quickly wash up and change into a matching hoodie and sweats set, startling yourself when you damn near run into Hongjoong lingering in your hallway. “Oh shit, you scared me.”

“Sorry.” He chuckles. “I don’t mean to seem like a creep, but I was just looking for your bathroom.. but.. I see you just came out of it, so..” He scratches at his temple and you giggle.

“I’m all done.” Hongjoong nods and brushes past, hurriedly making his way to the toilet to break the seal. Once he’s felt relief, he takes a minute to wash his hands and splash a bit of cold water to his face. He’s still feeling the alcohol, bits of the edible, too. But, he’s definitely not as crossed as earlier in the night. Just as he’s patting his face dry, he takes note of all your skincare laying around; that cute pink headband with a huge strawberry on it, various face sheet masks arranged neatly, random rings and other trinkets spread across the open space. Otherwise, both you and your roommate seem to be really organized and neat.

“Oh, uh, thanks.” He says when he catches you in your room. “For letting me borrow the bathroom.” You chuckle, Hongjoong’s eyes roaming around as he peeks in.

“You can come in, you know? My room isn’t entirely off limits.”

“I don’t want to intrude.” He gives you a small smile. “You do have a cozy room, though.”

“Thanks. I try.” You let out a tiny giggle, tossing your clothes into the hamper as he steps inside and slowly eyes the prints and photos organized beautifully along the off-white wall. 

“These are nice. Do you order them from somewhere in particular?”

“No. I just look online and buy whatever looks good.” You stand next to him.

“But.. these photos. Did you take them?” He points at the scenic photos you took of and around Hanauma Bay during a family trip to Oahu years ago.

“Yeah.” You tilt your head to the side. “Wow, I miss Oahu. I think it’s time to tell my family we need to do something and go back.” He chuckles.

“They’re beautiful.” You look at him and give him a tiny smile. “Everything about them. The angles. Crisp edges.” He says softly, mainly to himself, but it’s still loud enough for you to hear.

“Thanks. Are you into photography or something?”

“Yeah, I guess so. I try to take my own pictures, too. Just like holding onto memories that way.”

“I agree.” He smiles at you before glancing at the rest of your room. Everything about your room is also neat, organized and incredibly in sync— if that makes sense. Everything follows a certain theme, a certain color tone. Whites, creams, soft pastels. His eyes just gloss over the room in such a smooth way, he’s positive you love being in here.

“Do you spend a lot of time in your room?”

“How can you tell?”

“The way you decorated it. You put a lot of thought into it. It’s really nice. I meant it when I said it looked cozy.”

“You’re just throwing compliments left and right. What did I do to deserve it?” You laugh, and it Hongjoong finds his smile growing bigger.

“I’m just being honest.”

“Well, thank you, Hongjoong. I appreciate it.”

“Are you two hooking up or something? The food is here!” Yunho is heard at the end of the hallway, careful to not walk into something he doesn’t wanna walk into.

“Yunho, why the fuck would I hook up with someone with the door wide open?” You ask as you lead the way out of the room, Hongjoong following behind and shutting your room door close.

“I don’t know, you’re drunk.”

“I’m pretty sober now after everything that’s happened.” Wooyoung is at the coffee table, already spreading out the pizza boxes next to the bucket of chicken.

“So, you weren’t making out in there?” You smack Wooyoung upside the head before plopping down next to him. Hongjoong lets out a small laugh, taking a seat at the end of the coffee table while Mingi does the same on the opposite end. Ara and San are still flirting a storm on your couch, while Yunho takes a seat on Wooyoung’s free side.

“Do you want me to be?”

“I’m sure Hongjoong would be down, you were already pressed up on his lap earlier.” He whispers right into your ear.

“Oh my god. What’s wrong with you?” You pinch him on the thigh, making him yelp in response.

“I’m just saying you deserve all the fun, baby. Jesus. Just go for it next time.” He continues to tease. “Anyway, here. Let’s eat up.”

“What’s playing on the TV right now?” Yunho asks, already gobbling down a slice.

“Who fucking knows, but it’s kinda funny.” Wooyoung laughs at the screen. For the rest of the night, everyone is eating to their heart’s content and actually watching whatever movie happens to be playing on the TV. You stand for a moment to grab some water from the kitchen, unaware that Hongjoong had followed you over to grab another bottle of his own.

“Mind if I grab one, too?”

“Here.” You hand him the bottle, cocking a brow up when Hongjoong hasn’t stopped staring at you.

“Um.” He chuckles and points to your cheek. “May I? You.. there’s sauce.” You giggle.

“Oh shit, wow. That’s embarrassing.” He wets a paper towel before gently dabbing at your cheek, eyes focused on getting the sauce off of your skin. His face is merely inches away, hand gently holding your chin up towards the light. 

“There.” He says softly. Except, Hongjoong doesn’t release his grip from your chin right away, eyes now glazing over your features. You’re really, really pretty, and something about you is enticing to him; even if you two have barely known each other for the night, you are enticing and he is curious about you.

“Thank you, Hongjoong.” You say ever so sweetly and it confirms the thoughts swirling in his head— intoxicated or not.

“You’re welcome.” His thumb grazes over your cheek for one last quality control check before he steps back. “Wanna catch the rest of the movie?”

“Yeah, sure.”

Truth be told, Hongjoong isn’t even sure how the whole night unfolded this way. He wasn’t even planning on going out, but leave it to Mingi, San and Yunho to convince him until the very end. He had noticed you ever since the party, eyes glancing around the living room over the edge of his cup while he people-watched, took in his surroundings. What caught his eye the most was how bubbly and energetic you were around everyone, always being the life of the party and genuinely enjoying yourself. You’d loudly laugh and joke, smile from ear to ear while dancing around with a bag of chips in your hand. You didn’t have to do much to be that way, and Hongjoong could tell you were only being yourself. He liked that. He liked seeing you happy, he liked seeing you be you.

So colorful, vibrant.

But, truthfully, he was afraid to make a move. Mainly afraid, but he also knows what kinda wreck he’s been lately. Just lots of shit, lots of baggage— he’s not sure what he’s really ready for or if he’s ready for anything. The thoughts alone are enough to keep him still in his place, pushing certain desires and wants to the back of his mind to try and focus on fixing his shit first.

He can be selfish sometimes, though. It is beautifully dangerous for Hongjoong. Beautiful because it works, dangerous because it works.

So at the end of the night, after Hongjoong watches you giggle away to the stupid movie on the TV, after watching you happily gobble away at the pizza and chicken, after your hands grazed over his a few times; he is going to be selfish.

That would change the trajectory of everything for him, for you.

Ever since that night, Hongjoong and his friends would invite you and your friends to hang out at their apartments and vice versa— engaging in casual drinking over board games and more movies. Every hangout led to you and Hongjoong getting closer and closer, teetering into new territory quicker than you both imagined.

“Hey.” Hongjoong says, stepping out onto his balcony where he finds you getting some fresh air. “What’s a pretty girl like you doing out here?” He jokingly teases, making you roll your eyes even though you feel the heat rising to your cheeks.

“Ew, don’t ever.” He laughs, swinging an arm around your shoulders.

“Why are you smiling like that then?”

“Not because of you.” You tease.

“I don’t see anyone else out here.” He looks down at you. “Seriously, what’s up? You okay?”

“Just wanted to get some air.”

“Wanna go for a walk with me, or do you wanna stay here?”

“Can we stay here? I was looking up at the stars.” You look up. “They’re so bright tonight, Joong. I feel like I haven’t seen them like this in forever.”

“Hm.” He hums, eyes glued onto your side profile. You’re not even doing anything in particular, but this moment right here makes Hongjoong want to pull you close. 

Kiss you. 

Hold your hand.

“Are you looking?” You look at him with a brow cocked up and he laughs.

“Honestly, nah. I’m sorry, baby girl. I’m just..” He pauses, brushing the hair away from your face. “Let me take you out on a date.”

“You— wait, what?”

“Let me take you out on a date.” He chuckles, pressing his lips against the side of your head. “Please?” Hongjoong had been a bit more affectionate with you as time went on, and you welcomed it because whatever he was feeling, you surely were feeling too. Unspoken feelings and little acts of affection kept you going, and you thrived on it, if you were being honest. You loved the cute ‘lil pinches on your side, the ‘lil moments where he’d grab your hand and let it linger for awhile, the ‘lil moments you’d catch him staring at you from across the room, the ‘lil texts that showed you were on his mind in one way or another. It was the subtle chase, and you loved it.

“A date, hm?”

“I’m serious.” He clicks his teeth in defeat, making you giggle.

“Alright, yeah. Take me out on a date, Hongjoong.” He smiles.

“Yeah? It’ll be fun.”

“Where are you planning on taking me?”

“Why would I tell you that, pretty?” He boops the tip of your nose. “I promise. I got you.” 

And to that end, he did. He fulfilled his promise, and he did have you. He took you to a basketball game, one that you had been dying to catch for months, but never had the time to do so. He picked you up that morning and drove to the arena 45 minutes away from campus. It wasn’t like any other date you’ve been on, no. But, it was a date you enjoyed because you had fun and you were comfortable enough to be yourself around him already. You screamed together, you yelled at the refs together, you cheered on the team together. During the game, he’d hold your hand or throw an arm over your shoulder before giving you a quick peck on the cheek or temple. You don’t know what it is, but you trusted him. A lot. Quickly, too. 

After the game, he took you out for dinner at a casual restaurant nearby, asking you to order whatever you wanted and that he’d cover everything, as long as you were happy. The two of you talked about everything and anything about life, and you felt like Hongjoong understood you just as you did with him. You knew a bit about his family after all the kick-its and hangouts your friends had. You knew he had an older brother he looked up to and adored, you knew he loved his parents more than anything. You knew he loved his senior dog named Momo, and you knew he cherished his childhood home, his friends— near and far. He knew you also had a good relationship with your family, and he knew the little things about you that made you.. you. It was an equal situation of give and take; not one taking more or less than the other.

Sooner or later, more dates occurred, the affection and PDA progressed to the point that everyone automatically paired you two together. Wherever he was, they’d figured they’d find you there and vice versa. It wasn’t until the date at the baseball game a month later when he made things official with you. Hongjoong knew all the right things to do, all the right things to say. It almost felt unreal that you had him by your side— a stranger whose lap you sat on just to get away from the cops, a stranger you knew nothing about and had no intentions of getting close to.

That stranger became everything to you in such a short amount of time, but you didn’t want it any other way. It felt good being with Hongjoong, and it felt like pure bliss being with him. You were certain you had finally reached cloud nine, and you didn’t think you’d ever come down from it.

“Hello?” You pick up the phone just as you begin to walk to the parking lot after your last class; books tucked against your chest, bag strap slung on your shoulder.

“Hey baby, did you just get out of class?”

“Mhm. Finally! I’m so tired today.”

“Aw, I’m sorry. You don’t have anything else going on tonight, do you?”

“No, but I have homework to finish and I definitely have to study for our next test. What about you? How was school today?”

“Same old. Can’t complain. I just have some things to finish tonight, too.” You hear rustling in the background, followed by his door shutting.

“Did you just get home?”

“Yeah. I went to the gym really quickly.” He lets out a sigh. “I miss you.”

“Aw, I miss you, too. You’ll see me tomorrow, though.” 

“I know but.. it feels like a long time from now.” You step into your car and let out a breathy giggle. “Do you wanna just stay over tonight?” You pause, hearing the question come from him. You’ve hung out at Hongjoong’s apartment more times than you can count, but you’ve never stayed the night since Hongjoong was always so careful about being too quick or pressuring you into doing something you weren’t ready for. It’s not that you weren’t ready, and you definitely thought about it more recently. But, you were also shy because it felt like a huge step for you and Hongjoong’s relationship. Though, you knew he’d enjoy it just as much as you would. You just had to overcome all of your overthinking and get over your assumptions, you think.

“Joong, I have to study tonight.”

“Study at mine. I won’t bug you.” He laughs. “I have some homework I gotta get through, too.” Silence. “Baby, no pressure but I really just miss you.”

“Joongie.” You almost whine. You miss him, too. You really, really do. “Okay, yeah.”

“Really?” He says excitedly.

“Mhm.” You laugh. “I just need to go home, shower and pack a few things.”

“Mmkay. Let me know when you’re ready.”

“Okay.”

“See you soon, pretty girl.” You hang up the call, eyeing the phone before shaking your head and driving home. Not gonna lie, you were extra nervous. You were excited to finally spend the night with him, but you were nervous. You were nervous thinking about what the night would bring. What could it possibly bring? Were you two really gonna study and just go to sleep? Would Hongjoong expect things from you? Hongjoong would kiss you, slowly make out with you and touch you in certain places, but never expected more from it— again, mainly because he was afraid to unintentionally pressure you in any way.

Welp.

You quickly brush your thoughts away and hop in the shower before throwing on a lazy outfit consisting of an oversized sweater and biker shorts. You pack up some things, telling your roommate you’ll be back tomorrow. She teases you a few times about finally sleeping over, yelling from her room that she’ll be excited to hear details if you actually do come back the following day.

When Hongjoong comes, it’s about 15 minutes after you finish packing. He tells you he’s parked near the curb out front, slipping into your shoes and rushing out the front door to greet him. He’s in a hoodie and sweats, hood up on his head while he scrolls through his phone waiting for your arrival.

“Hi.” You happily say, hopping into the passenger’s seat after dropping your bags into the trunk.

“Hey.” He beams at you, leaning over for a kiss. “Ready?” You nod, buckling in your seatbelt. Hongjoong stops by the nearest McDonalds to grab some greasy fast food for you two to indulge in while you both study away.

The apartment is quiet tonight, with San being out and Mingi studying away in his room. The both of you make a beeline to his room, Hongjoong hauling your bags while you take charge of carrying the food in. You place the bag down on the desk, carefully setting the food onto the surface. You let out a squeal when you feel his arms wrap around your waist, pulling you in between his legs when he settles onto the edge of his bed.

“I missed you. I’m glad you’re staying tonight.” His hands are at your hips, gently squeezing before caressing your bare skin.

“I missed you, too.” You cup his cheeks and give him a kiss on the lips.

“Let’s eat first?” He chases after your lips for another quick kiss. “You’ll have energy to study.”

“Yeah, that sounds good.” You give him a tiny, toothless smile. You and Hongjoong talk about your day in more detail while eating, laughing and teasing each other before settling down for the rest of the evening. He offers you a shirt to change into so you can be more comfortable, and you take it; slipping into it with ease before plopping back onto his bed with your books in hand. You tuck one leg in, while the other is propped out, with Hongjoong laying on his stomach next to you. He plants random kisses along your leg from time to time, throwing an arm over to hold onto it while he continues to work through his homework.

Surprisingly, you do finish everything.

“Babe.” You call for him as you shut your books close about two hours later, Hongjoong now folding some clothes and putting them away in his closet.

“Mhm?”

“I’m done.” You smile, packing your things into your backpack.

“Nice. See, I told you I wouldn’t bug you.” You laugh, making grabby-hands at Hongjoong.

“Are you almost done, though?”

“I am. Just a few more, then we can cuddle for the rest of the night. Sound good?” You nod.

“I’m gonna get ready for bed.” You hop off and grab your toiletries, throwing on a random pair of Hongjoong’s extra sweats before waddling to the bathroom. You take your time brushing your teeth, washing your face and getting cozy for the night before heading back into Hongjoong’s room. He’s back on the edge of his bed, this time, sorting through Netflix to find something to watch. You carefully slip under his sheets, texting away with Ara and Wooyoung until Hongjoong shuts off his lights and slips in next to you.

The one thing you’ve learned from Hongjoong is that he always gives you his full attention. He never scrolls through his phone for long if you’re with him, doesn’t let other shit occupy his attention. It’s you, and it’s always about you.

So, you set your phone aside and let him pull you into his arms, fixing the pillows so you could comfortably lay on his chest while he lays back against the headboard.

“You okay, baby? Comfortable?” He asks softly. You nod and he gives you a sweet, feathery kiss on the top of your head before starting the movie. There’s silence that falls between you two when the movie begins, but it’s comfortable. It’s sweet, it’s comfortable, it’s peace. Hongjoong gently runs his hand up and down your arm, tracing faint shapes on the surface as a small, reassuring way of saying he loves taking care of you— loves keeping you safe, warm.

Eventually, the movie hits the halfway mark, and you’re kinda over it. You’re over it because all you wanna do is kiss Joong and lazily make out with him until you can’t anymore. You just want him, all of him, and you don’t really wanna wait for the next opportunity to come around when you can have him here, right now. In this bed.

“Babe.” You call for him softly as you rest your chin on his chest and look up at him.

“Hm?” He hums, eyes still glued to the TV.

“Pay attention to me.” You pout, making him shift his attention from the screen down to you.

“I am.” He laughs a bit, hand gently massaging at your scalp. “What can I do for you, baby girl?”

“Just want a kiss.”

“Mm. I’ll be more than happy to give you that.” He smiles. “C’mere.” He adjusts once more while you rise and bring yourself closer, lips locking onto his the moment you are close enough to do so. Even after you pull away, you repeatedly kiss him— Hongjoong squeezing your side in between kisses as a way to encourage you to keep going. 

And you do.

The kiss deepens and the movie is now a long-gone thought in the background; simply filling noise, filling space. He lets out a soft sigh when you tug back on his bottom lip and suck onto it, following up with another kiss to keep the intensity alive. Your tongues are fighting for dominance, giving Hongjoong leverage to lay you down onto the mattress while he hovers over your body.

His lips trail down your jaw, down to your neck. He gently nips and sucks at the surface, leaving marks along the way to show off who you truly belong to in this crazy, fucked up world. You are his, and his only.

“Wanna take care of you, baby. Can I?” He pauses as his hand slowly travels underneath your shirt and up your side, thumb caressing right under your bra line. You simply nod, feeling his hand travel to the back of your bra to unhook it in one quick move. You help by tugging your straps down and tossing the bra off to the side, Joong’s hand now coming up to cup your breast— letting out a shaking breath when he toys with your perked nipples. 

“Joong.” You whimper. He gives you a look before he pulls your shirt upward, tongue carefully swirling around a bud before repeating the same on the other. He watches as your back slightly arches in response, goosebumps etched on your chest, arms. He plants chaste kisses down your stomach, trailing down to your clothed core.

“Is it okay if I keep going?” He whispers, fingers toying with the band of your cute red panties.

“Please.” You respond, arousal overflowing in the pit of your gut. He hooks his finger onto your panties and slides them off, biting onto his bottom lip when he finally has you like this under his hold. To be honest, you’ve never really had fulfilling sexual experiences in your previous relationship. The sex was good, but it wasn’t great, nor was it memorable. Your ex had a tendency to fuck for one purpose only, and that was to get himself off. He’d never go down on you, but he’d finger you as part of the foreplay. He’d keep it to missionary, never really down to explore other positions or find something that’ll spice up shit in the bedroom. But you were young, so you never really complained. You truthfully thought that was how sexual experiences worked— who were you to fight against that if you didn’t really have anything else to work off of or compare it to?

The other thing about Hongjoong is that he is keen on showing you differently, satisfying and pleasing you to the end. Because it’s you, and it’s always about you.

His thumb presses against your clit, earning a small gasp from you. He smiles at how sensitive you are, damn near begging him to touch you in all the right places, fuck you ‘till you can’t walk. And he will, but he wants to explore you first; really explore you and take you in.

“You’re so beautiful.” His eyes are glued onto you, slipping in two digits inside of you. “So wet.” He curls his fingers just right, pumping them at a perfect rhythm. 

“Oh— Joongie.” You let out, toes curling at the end of the bed, hands gripping the sheets when he lowers himself back down in between your thighs; pressing sweet kisses to the inner parts before coming down to your pussy. Everything feels so slow, yet so intimate and special, even when Hongjoong finally latches on and laps away at your clit while his digits continue to pump into you. You’re moaning a little louder now, but he only hopes the TV is loud enough to muffle the noises because he truly could care less about shushing you and trying to keep it down for his roommates.

Oops.

So as to say that you’ve never had memorable sexual experiences with your past, you’ve also never really felt what a real, raw orgasm felt like. And when the first one hits you, it feels like a certain high where all you hear are fireworks exploding. You tremble in his grip and Joong soothes you by kissing you all over, praising you for doing so well, whispering that he’d continue to take care of you. He digs for a condom in his nightstand, sheets draped over his body when he sits back to roll the condom down on his length. Your eyes can’t help fix on it, his tip red and angry— ready to feel you, make you feel good but equally ruin you in the best possible ways.

He eases himself in, lips grazing over yours as he locks eyes with you. The both of you let out soft moans while adjusting to the feeling, Joong keeping a slow pace until you’re more comfortable. 

“Keep going.” You manage to whisper against him, enjoying the feeling of being full of him. He picks up his pace, rocking his hips at a steadier pace that has him muttering curse words to himself, your nails digging into his back while your moans get a little louder.

“Baby.” He chuckles. “Fuck— you sound so sexy, but—” He pants a bit, furrowing his brows as he forces himself to hold on a little bit longer. “Mingi.”

“I can’t.” You whine. “Feels too good.” He lets out another shaky breath hearing that slip from your lips, his ego climbing just a bit knowing he can make you tremble under his grip, knowing he has you wrapped around his finger like this.

“So good.” He responds. “So good for me, princess. You’re so, so good.” He praises you, nibbling on your earlobe when his hips snap at a messier, rougher pace. He sucks on your neck more, darkening the reddish blobs littering across the column. You start to move your hips to match his movements, earning a deep groan from Hongjoong. “Ohhhfuck, Y/N. I won’t last.” He dips his thumb down to your clit, wanting to push you over the edge so, so badly. “Can you come for me again, baby? Hm?”

“Hongjoong.” You repeatedly moan his name like a mantra, feeling the coil in your stomach threatening to snap any second now. 

“Mhm, that’s it. Come all over me. Give it to me.” He coaxes you. Suddenly, your orgasm washes over and makes your bones feel like jelly; everything sounds and feels like white noise even when Hongjoong snaps his hips roughly, chasing his high until he spills into the condom.

“Holy fuck.” You manage to let out as you try to regulate your breathing— eyes glossy, lips swollen, hair a mess, hickeys covering your neck. It’s a beautiful fucking sight to Hongjoong, and god, does he love seeing you underneath him like this.

“God, you’re perfect.” He kisses you on the lips, carefully removing himself from inside of you. He steps out of the bed and tosses the condom into the trash, slipping back into his sweats to grab the wipes from the bathroom. “You’re so pretty.” He laughs, watching as you lie there, letting him clean you up and take care of you.

“This is pretty to you?”

“Incredibly.” He smiles. “Gonna grab us some water.” He turns to the TV. “Fuck the movie, I guess?” You laugh.

“Yeah, I’m sleepy.”

“Okay, baby. I’ll be right back.” He kisses your forehead before running out to grab some water.

“I see you two were having some fun.” Mingi says with a smirk on his face, exiting the bathroom after a quick shower. Hongjoong truthfully didn’t even hear his ass walk into the bathroom and step into the shower.

“Oops. My bad, dude. We’ll keep it down next time.” Hongjoong chuckles, returning to the room with some water. “Here, drink some. You should probably go pee, too.”

“Joong, I’m so lazy.” You respond after chugging some water.

“Go.” He hands you the sweats you were wearing earlier. You roll your eyes and shove them on, earning a quick ass-slap from Hongjoong for the attitude.

You definitely slept well that night.

And the next morning felt even more perfect, being that you didn’t wake up to a Hongjoong next to you; but, you did wake up to a Hongjoong bringing you a plate of breakfast in bed. He cutely sat on the edge of the bed, brushing the hair out of your face while the other hand held a plate with rice, eggs and spam drizzled in sriracha. You certainly didn’t wanna leave him that day, especially when he pressed repeated kisses against your lips in the car— reassuring you he’d be back to pick you up after classes.

“How was it?” Wooyoung asks as you two sit in the café before classes, raising a brow at the hickeys you’re trying to cover with your sweater [but clearly failing]. “Or should I even ask?” He scratches at his neck as a way to point out your hickeys.

“Uh.” You fiddle with the straw on your drink, biting onto your bottom lip to prevent yourself from smiling too big.

“Ew.” He laughs. “You’re so bad at hiding them, dude. Did he try to eat you or something?”

“You asked!” You tuck your hoodie up. “I didn’t think he’d give me that many hickeys.”

“Mm.” Wooyoung hums. “At least it was good.” He snorts, making you toss a crumpled napkin at his face.

“He made me breakfast in bed, too.”

“You spoiled little brat.” He laughs, this time earning a kick under the table. “Ow, you’re so fiesty today!” He complains.

“Woo, listen to me.” You pout.

“What? The fuck can you possibly be sad about when you got the best fuck of your life and breakfast in bed?”

“Sometimes, I feel like he’s too good to be true.” You give him a look.

“What, why?”

“He’s just so good to me.”

“And you deserve to be loved that way, Y/N. Don’t ever question that shit.” Wooyoung points at you in a scolding manner. “I can tell he genuinely cares about you and really, really likes you. Let the guy love you.”

“Really?” He smiles and nods.

“Yeah, really. It’s the cutest shit. You two are cute.” He pats himself on the back. “Say thank you Wooyoung for throwing us in the backseat of Yunho’s car.”

“Fuck no, you wish.” You joke. Though, you really are grateful for that specific moment. You are grateful to Wooyoung and his irrational, loud, spontaneous ass. You are grateful that Yunho just happened to be there, right at that very second, with the people he was with. Because it brought you to Hongjoong, the one person that has become your homie, lover and friend all in one.

So yeah, maybe Wooyoung is right. After your shitty exes and unfulfilling relationships, maybe you do deserve this. 

All of this.

—SUMMER

“Y/N, my favorite!” Hongjoong’s dad says happily as he stands at the front door, watching you step out of the car.

“Hi to you too.” Hongjoong jokes with his dad, making him push Hongjoong out of the way in order to pull you into a big hug. “Mom, your husband doesn’t know how to show love to his youngest son!” Hongjoong yells into the house.

“Hi!” You hug him back before stepping into the house, kicking off your shoes and setting your duffle bag down. His mom comes to greet you, followed by his older brother and his dog, Momo.

“You look so cute today.” His mom says, bringing you to the dining table. “Come eat, I just finished cooking. I made sure to get you some fried fish since I know it’s your favorite.” You sit and look up at her with appreciation before letting out a small ‘thank you.’

When Hongjoong first told you that his family really wanted to meet you, you were scared. You were scared, and you were nervous. All you wanted to do was make a good impression, enough for them to like you and support your relationship with their son. 

But it ended up being so much more than that, and you were super happy with the outcome.

You had built such a strong bond with his family over time, just as he did with yours. You constantly wanted to join Hongjoong when he visited home. His parents always asked about you, always wanted to know when the next time you’d drop by. Sometimes, his parents would drive down just to hang out and see you both. Hongjoong had taken you to a huge family gathering or two, his parents proudly showing you off to their family members.

It went the same way with your own parents, but your parents weren’t as adventurous as Hongjoong’s. They loved taking weekend trips to nearby places, while your family loved staying home and being in their comfort zone with the occasional family trips here and there. Your family wasn’t as big as his, and your family loved being lowkey. It wasn’t a problem, but you ended up hanging out with Hongjoong and his family more just because they were closer to the universities and had more plans in store. Plus, you bonded with his father and his older brother over basketball. It was always a good time.

“What time are you guys heading to the party tonight?” His dad sits on the opposite side, already digging into the fried fish that laid flat in the center of the table.

“I don’t know, probably 9 or something.” Hongjoong picks at the fish, dropping pieces into your bowl of rice.

“Whose house is it at?”

“Joshua’s.” His dad nods.

“Y/N, you’re finally gonna meet his childhood friends.” You nod.

“I know, I can’t wait.” You giggle.

“They’re all obnoxious freeloaders.” Hongjoong’s mom laughs while she washes the pans in the sink, telling his father to be nice.

“So what hotel are we staying at over the weekend?” The main reason you two came down for the weekend was because it was a childhood friend’s birthday, and because his parents had plans to do a weekend staycation at a hotel nearly 1.5 hours away. They invited you two to come along, especially since his brother was tagging along, too.

“It’s a smaller one, but it has suites. Ours has a full blown kitchen, living area and two rooms. But we have to sneak Momo in.”

“What do you mean we have to sneak Momo in?” Hongjoong chuckles. “You didn’t check if it was a pet-friendly hotel?”

“I think it is, but I’m not sure. It’s too late to ask anyway. He won’t make a peep.” The both of you turn to Momo sleeping in his crate.

“Yeah, he’s an old man.”

“You and your brother need to sleep out on the pull-out couch so Y/N has the room to herself.”

“Babe, I’m gonna slip into your room.” You playfully nudge him in the midst of eating, rolling your eyes.

“I’m sure the couch will be just as great, Joongie.”

“Don’t be like that.” He pouts.

“Give her some space, my goodness.” You laugh at his mom’s response, excited to spend the weekend with them nonetheless. 

The night comes rather quickly, especially after you’ve walked Momo with Joong and tagged along to buy some groceries for the weekend staycation. You’ve dressed yourself up in a cute little mini skirt and a top, while Hongjoong is sporting a white Stussy shirt, black jeans and a backwards cap. The house isn’t too far from his own; the town that his family lives in not being incredibly huge. He pulls up to a block lined with big, two-story homes [similarly to his], parking in a spot around the round-about. The house at the corner is flooding with people— either hanging out outside or in the house, and the music is muffled behind the walls of the house.

“Ready, baby?” You give him a nod and he quickly leans over to kiss you on the lips. The two of you walk hand in hand towards the house, Hongjoong already greeting people the moment you’ve stepped onto the property. 

You’re a bit relieved when you see San, Mingi and Yunho hanging around in the house, instantly greeting them while Hongjoong continues to say his hellos. It’s not long before you’re returning back to his side because Hongjoong is proudly introducing you to everyone as his girlfriend, his lady, his girl; arm either swung around your shoulder or your waist. Even though these are people he mainly grew up with, you didn’t feel entirely left out with how down-to-earth and outgoing everyone was.

“Let me get you something to drink.” Hongjoong kisses your temple before tapping your hips and leaving you to Yunho, San and Mingi. 

“Dude, I’m glad you came tonight.” Yunho swings an arm around you. “Where’s Woo at?”

“He went home, too! He’s barely been around his apartment cause he’s been spending time with family.”

“He does hate being around school.” You laugh.

“He does.” 

“Did you get to meet everyone? I think mostly everyone’s here.” Mingi looks around, sipping on his drink. Hongjoong comes back around with a red cup full of a sweet, fruity cocktail in his hand. He hands you the cup and presses another chaste kiss to your lips before hugging you from behind.

“I think so.” Right at this moment, more roars are coming towards the backyard door where a few heads walk in. Loud greetings and hugs are being thrown towards the group that just arrived, Hongjoong, Yunho, San and Mingi happily greeting the guy that walks in first.

“My guy!” Hongjoong daps him up and everything, even with his one arm still wrapped around your shoulder.

“Kim fucking Hongjoong, it’s about time! I haven’t seen you in so long, dude!” The guy looks down at you with a big smile, giving you a curt nod. “Who’s the pretty lady? Is this Y/N?”

“Sure is.” Hongjoong smiles. “This is my girlfriend, Y/N. Y/N, Jisung.” He properly introduces you.

“I’ve heard so much about you.” He smiles, his semi-long permed black hair cascading down the sides of his face. “It’s a pleasure to finally meet you!” Truthfully, you’ve probably only heard Jisung’s name tossed around a few times, but Joong has never really talked about him like that. It does make your heart soar that he’s proudly talking about you and beaming about your relationship.

A girl comes up behind Jisung and loudly greets Yunho, San and Mingi. Her eyes simply glaze over you and Hongjoong, but she manages to mutter a small ‘hey’ before pulling Jisung to the drinks. It’s not until someone calls out her name that you realize it’s Hongjoong’s Tara; his ex, Tara. You don’t miss how Hongjoong’s smile fades a bit, and how his body becomes rather stiff. But, he manages to play it off well— returning his attention to you as if the vibe switch never happened. He had always been honest about his relationship with her, telling you that they had always been close before they started dating. But unfortunately, all of that has gone to waste with how awful their break up was. He doesn’t give you details on the breakup— how, why or when it happened. You just know that they’re awkward, and that they’re back to being strangers.

It is what it is, he says. Maybe it just works out better that way. 

You never pressed on it, never asked him more. Because whatever Hongjoong was willing to share was okay with you, and as long as he was okay, you were okay. Same thing goes for you and your ex— Hongjoong never pressed you to share what you weren’t comfortable with; but he damn sure made up for everything you had gone through in your previous relationship. He made sure to kiss every scar, every wound, every thought, that made you believe you weren’t enough or that you lacked in certain areas.

Because to him, you truly didn’t. You were one of a kind.

Throughout the night, you and Hongjoong continue to stick to each other, sharing affectionate moments in between silly dances. Tara surprisingly didn’t make her presence known much, and that eased the anxiety you felt when she first walked in. It’s not like you expected him to be bothered purely by the way he talked about their history, but at the same time, you didn’t know what to expect and you didn’t know her. You just wanted to have a good time with him and the people he enjoyed being around. You loved being with him more than anything, and you loved the attention he always gave you. You didn’t have to ask because Hongjoong always gave, always made sure to take care of you before anyone else. 

Towards the end, you find yourself clinging close to Yunho and participating in a round of beer pong with him while Hongjoong steps outside to take a few hits of a blunt Jisung made. 

“I’m glad you brought Y/N along. I’ve been dying to meet her since your ass talks about her so much.” Joong laughs just as he exhales.

“That’s my girl.” 

“You look hella happy with her.”

“I am. We just.. fit. She really does make me happy.” Joong takes another hit.

“That’s good. I’m happy for you.” Jisung chuckles. “So does that mean..?” Joong looks at him because he already knows what he’s talking about.

“We’re not really talking.”

“That’s not what I was gonna ask, though.” Jisung cocks a brow up. “I’m assuming you’re over her and everything since Y/N is around now.”

“Mhm. Yeah.” Is all Hongjoong says. “Been over with.”

“Okay.” Jisung responds. He leaves it at that because even though a tiny part of him feels like Hongjoong isn’t actually over it, who is he to argue against it? Only Hongjoong knows what’s going on in that head of his. Jisung can only hope you don’t get hurt by anything in the end because you seem like a genuinely nice and sweet girl.

Once Hongjoong and Jisung are done smoking, he comes to find you finishing up the round with Yunho. He celebrates your victory, showering you in kisses before whispering in your ear that he wanted to get the fuck up out of there. You take the keys from him and step into the driver’s seat, sober enough compared to your boyfriend since Yunho took all the beer during beer pong. The both of you recount different moments of the party, with you telling Hongjoong that you really enjoyed meeting his group of friends from home.

“Baby.” He breaks the silence, hand on your thigh and giving it a good squeeze.

“Yes?” You quickly look over at him before looking back out to the road.

“You’re so pretty.” He says, the weed still in his system; eyes still glossy and red. “I liked seeing you have fun tonight.”

“Joong.” You giggle.

“No, seriously. You’re perfect.” He squeezes at your thigh again, fingers slowly trailing up to your inner thighs and sending goosebumps to ripple through your body.

“No one’s perfect.”

“You are. To me.” Your breath quietly hitches when you feel his fingers tease at the hem of your skirt. “My pretty girl.” His hand finally dips underneath, teasing at your panties.

“You do remember we’re going back to your parents’ house, right?”

“Mhm.” He teases at the edge of the material; so close, yet so far. Threatening to be right where you want him. “Just sleep in my room.”

“I’m not doing that with your parents around, Hongjoong.” He chuckles.

“They won’t care. Fuck the guest room. You can just be quiet for me, right pretty?” He bites onto his bottom lip.

“Hongjoong.” You whine, almost unable to finish the drive home with the way your boyfriend is being.

“Pull into the park’s lot.” He points ahead. “Need you right now.”

“In the lot?!”

“You won’t sleep in my room, so..” You let out a breath, still obeying to pull into the lot. You needed him just as bad, the ache becoming unbearable in between your legs. You park under the tree for more ‘privacy’ [if you can even it call it that], the rest of the lot completely empty and dark. As soon as you put the gear in park, Hongjoong is tugging onto your shirt, begging for you to be on his lap. “Ride me.” He adjusts the seat enough so that you have room to climb over, already unbuckling his belt and undoing his jeans. When you land on his lap, he tugs your panties to the side and guides you onto his tip, letting out a loud moan when you finally sink down on his length. “Fuuuuck.”

“Joong, someone might see us.”

“No one will see us.” He digs his fingers deeper into your hips, encouraging you to work your hips faster.

“We don’t even have a condom!”

“I’ll pull out.” He laughs. “Fuck baby, I promise. We’re okay.” He kisses you sweetly on the lips. “Just need you right now. Ride me like the good girl you are, hm?” You let out a breathy moan hearing his raspy voice, working your hips back and forth at a steady pace.

“Feels so good.” You whine.

“Always know how to ride me so well.” He dips his thumb into your mouth, watching you wrap your pretty lips around it. “And you’re all mine. Right, princess?”

“I’m yours.” You mewl with a nod just as he slips his thumb out of your mouth, hand now coming to your neck with enough pressure. He pulls you in for a sloppy, wet kiss, shared moans released in between kisses. The friction against your clit is adding onto the pleasure you feel, your orgasm building quick. It only takes a few more rolls against him before you feel yourself unraveling, moans echoing within the car— you’d really be surprised if nobody questioned it. The car moving, sounds probably heard through the windows.

You can’t believe him right now.

“Hongjoong, I’m gonna—” You don’t even finish your sentence before your squeezing the life out of him, walls pulsing around his length. It’s enough to bring Hongjoong’s orgasm out of him, the panic lowkey mixing with the pleasure he’s feeling.

“Fuck— up, baby. Up.” He taps your hips and you move upwards, Joong releasing right into his hand as soon as he’s out. You’re still twitching from the sensitivity while also trying to regulate your breathing, exhaustion hitting you quick in the tight space. “Shit.” Hongjoong says, looking around to grab a napkin.

“You’re so messy.” You joke, making him laugh.

“Where else could I have done it, hm? Enlighten me.” You point to your mouth to tease him. He responds by clicking his teeth, wiping away in between your legs before tending to himself. “Don’t say shit like that, Y/N. We might never make it back to my parents’ place.” You laugh and hop off, albeit struggling to make it back to the driver’s seat.

“We’re leaving.” You fix yourself a bit more before buckling your seatbelt in and starting up the car. Joong continues to adjust himself back into his jeans before settling, letting out a hefty sigh when he’s comfortable.

“Offer still stands, love.”

“What offer?”

“To sleep in my room.”

“No. Absolutely not.”

“Why?” He pouts and whines. “I’m telling you right now, my parents won’t care.”

“I do!”

“Baby, how are you gonna do me like that?”

“You’ll see me down the hall in the morning.” You smile at him before driving up the hill, the park literally being down the street from the house. When you arrive and park at the curb in front of the house, you and Joong quietly step inside and slip out of your shoes. He playfully grabs you by the waist, pulling you into more kisses in the dark to prevent you from heading up the stairs. You silently scold him and laugh against his lips, afraid his parents will wake up and see you two making out in the entryway. Just as you’re about to head down to the guest room, Joong tugs you by the wrist and pulls you into his room for another round of kisses. 

“Just stay with me.” He whispers before locking his lips with yours again.

“I’m down the hall.” He gently sucks onto your bottom lip, slightly pushing himself up against you. “Kim Hongjoong. Stop it.” You tap him on the chest and he sighs in defeat.

“I hate sleeping without you.”

“It’s for one weekend.” You blush at Hongjoong’s neediness. Quite frankly, you don’t wanna be without him either, and it’s taking everything in you to leave him. “I’ll see you in the morning, okay?”

“Fine.” He meets your eyes while caressing your chin. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.” You smile at him before leaving him in his room to head down to the guest room. The guest room has a half bathroom that you use to get ready for the night. You quickly wash up and throw on a comfy pajama set before slipping into the bed and plugging your phone into the charger. Hongjoong sends you a few more texts and pouty faces before you send one final text saying you were setting the phone down for the night.

The next morning, you’re woken up by his parents making breakfast downstairs, followed by Hongjoong’s dad yelling for him and his brother to wake up and take Momo out. Hongjoong’s actually the first to be up, responding that he’ll take Momo out after he checks on his other baby first. You giggle to yourself under the covers until you feel another body jump onto the sheets and hug you tightly. He showers you with tickles and kisses before getting up to get ready for the rest of the weekend ahead.

Which, was amazing. Something you’ll always remember, something you’ll always keep close to your heart.

The hotel was small, but beautiful, and it sat in the middle of a cute town. You successfully snuck Momo into the suite with Hongjoong and his brother; the boys tasked with hauling his things and his crate, while you tucked him nicely into a blanket and carried him into the room once the coast was clear. The entire weekend was spent walking around town or playing around at the pool while Hongjoong’s parents always cooked the best meals. Hongjoong would occasionally sneak into your room just to pepper you with kisses and lay with you for a bit before you would whine about his parents finding him in there. It was a weekend full of laughter, bonding, candid photos, kisses and sweet praises from Hongjoong— telling you he felt so lucky to have you.

You, perfect for him.

You, everything to him.

And that continued even after the weekend. You and Hongjoong both found summer jobs just to keep yourselves busy, but he never failed to make you feel loved despite the slight change in schedules. He’d drop by as soon as you both were off, bringing you a bouquet of ‘just cause’ flowers before kissing you and holding you close. He’d bring you to work on days he didn’t have work and patiently wait for you to get off. He’d cook you a good meal, cuddle you and make love to you in the best [yet nastiest] ways. He’d surprise you with little things here and there— shoes, little trinkets, shirts— things he knew you’d like and that reminded him of you, only you. The hangouts with your friends and his friends continued, the bond between all of you only growing more tight.

You could say that summer was amazing. It was the happiest you’ve felt in such a long time. Or.. ever, if you’re being honest.

You were so happy that the moments when Hongjoong would go home for a night to hang out with his childhood friends or help his parents, you’d be sad. You knew you couldn’t always be with him, but those moments when you weren’t, easily made you feel incomplete. You were used to having him around, stuck at your hip while he kissed your temple and kept you close.

You felt empty, like your other half was missing.

“You’re leaving me.” You pout as you wait for your smoothie to be done, Hongjoong resting his chin on top of your head while he lazily holds you from behind. Tonight was one of those nights where you’d be sleeping without Hongjoong, a night where you wouldn’t get any cuddles, kisses.

A night without his warmth.

“Only for the night, love. I’ll be back tomorrow.” He presses his lips to your head. Once your smoothie is done, you take it to the car with your hand in his, head hung low because you don’t wanna be without Hongjoong for a night. You’ve gotten so used to being with him that one night feels way too long.

When he finally gets you back to the apartment, he kisses you sweetly; hands cupping your cheeks before he presses a kiss to your forehead. He tells you how much he’s gonna miss his pretty girl for the night, but he’ll be back before you know it. You smile, hugging him tightly before waving him off and watching his car drive off towards the direction of home.

Though you already missed him, you happily skip to your room and eat your favorite breakfast bagel with your smoothie; reminiscing about how summer has been so, so good to you.

How Hongjoong has been so, so good to you.

—SENIOR YEAR IN COLLEGE

“Hi!” You giggle as you hop into Hongjoong’s car, leaning in to kiss him. But, he moves away, furrowing his brows at you. He’s angry, and you’re not exactly sure why. “Um, okay. What’s wrong?”

“Where have you been? I’ve been waiting here for close to 15 minutes and you weren’t even answering my texts or calls.”

“Babe, I’m sorry. Class ran late and then I ran into Ara and Wooyoung on the way over.” He pulls out of the lot rather quickly, speeding off to his apartment from campus. “Slow down.”

“You couldn’t take that one second to text me or let me know?”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t think about it.” He doesn’t respond.

“Yeah, you didn’t.”

“It’s 15 minutes, Joong.”

“I’m just saying you could’ve told me, Y/N. I picked you up, it’s the least you could do.”

“The least I could do? If you didn’t wanna pick me up, you could’ve just said so—”

“That’s not the point.”

“Hongjoong, I didn’t do this on purpose. It just slipped my mind.” Your bottom lip starts to tremble. “Why are you so angry with me? I haven’t seen you all day.”

“Exactly.” Is all he says, leaning into his hand propped near the window as the other steers the wheel. You feel the tears building up quickly because not only was this unintentional, but Hongjoong is making you feel incredibly guilty for no reason. 

“I said I was sorry. Why are you being like that?”

“I’m not being like anything, Y/N.”

“You’re being mean.”

“Am I?” He quickly turns to you with a glare before looking back out at the road. “I do hella shit for you, the least you could do is fucking let me know you’re gonna be late instead of letting me look dumb.” You flinch at his words, a mixture of both anger and sadness running through your body.

“I don’t mean to be such a chore for you.”

“Wow, there you go putting words into my mouth again. No one even said that.” You cross your arms and quietly slump in your seat, subtly wiping away at the tears streaming down your cheeks. You don’t even continue the conversation, leaving the air heavy and thick for the remaining 10 minute drive home to his apartment.

Once you get there, you simply kick off your shoes and sadly greet San and Mingi before walking into Hongjoong’s room. You change into comfier clothes, and slip into bed; studying for next week’s test and taking notes on your iPad while Joong talks to the boys outside in the living room. They start up a game of FIFA that has them screaming in the living room for an hour or so before they decide they’re gonna head out for a bit. Usually, Hongjoong skips in and begs you to come because he doesn’t wanna go anywhere without you. He loves having fun with you, seeing you smile and being able to kiss you in between.

But tonight, he rushes into the room without saying a word, and grabs a jacket before heading back out. The door to his room shuts close and you can’t help but feel your heart break. All of this over being 15 minutes late, and you feel terrible about yourself.

Why were you doing everything wrong?

“Woo.” You cry into the phone.

“What’s wrong?” You continue to cry quietly. “Y/N, what’s wrong?”

“Joong was just hella mad at me. For the dumbest reason.”

“What happened?”

“Dude, he was so mad at me for taking too long. Said I should’ve just texted him and let him know instead of making him look dumb for 15 minutes.”

“I’m sorry, what? That’s what you’re arguing about?” He clicks his teeth. “Y/N, please stop crying. Where is he right now?”

“I don’t know, he left with San and Mingi.”

“Do you want me to pick you up?”

“No, it’s fine.”

“He didn’t say anything else to you?”

“No. He was angry. Sped the fuck off to the apartment and everything.”

“I get where he’s coming from but it’s really not that big of a deal. It’s not like you always do this to him.”

“Why do I feel so bad and guilty about everything? I always feel like I’m doing something wrong.”

“You’re not. He’s just not thinking.” You sniff and wipe away at your face, glancing at the time. You didn’t think Hongjoong would be back any time soon, so you continue to talk to Wooyoung on the phone while going through your notes. It’s about 2 hours in before Wooyoung says he’s gonna call it a night since he needs to wake up early and head home for the weekend. You let him go and get yourself ready for bed— fully expecting Hongjoong to probably sleep outside or create a gap between you two.

You wake up close to midnight when you hear San barge into the room with repeated apologies, hair a mess.

“Y/N, I am so sorry to wake you, but I need help.” You look up at him and sit up, rubbing at your eyes. Suddenly, the sound of someone falling into the floor and crashing into the dining room table echoes in the living room and San panics. “They’re both fucking drunk.” San says, stumbling back into the living room to find Mingi laid out on the dining room chairs, while Hongjoong is on the floor. You sigh and let San guide Mingi to his room, while you tend to your boyfriend.

“Joong, get up.”

“Baby. I’m sooo drunk.”

“Yeah, I can see that. You need to get up, though.” You try to pull him up by the arm. Luckily, he cooperates, though he stumbles a bit while you guide him to the bathroom. “Can we get you ready for bed?”

“Only if you come with me.” He hiccups. You shake your head and sigh.

“Yeah.” You sit him on the toilet. “Sit. I need to grab you some clothes.”

“I’m gonna fall over and die.” He laughs.

“You’re not.” San comes out of the hallway, letting out a huge sigh.

“Mingi’s in bed.”

“Can you watch him? I need to grab him some clothes.” San sits with him while you grab him a change of clothes. You hear them fumbling in the bathroom before Hongjoong lets out another laugh.

“Dude, keep still. Jesus Christ. You’re so lucky Y/N’s taking care of you. I would’ve left your ass there to fend for yourself.” He scolds him just as you walk back into the bathroom.

“Thanks, Sannie.” He gives you a tiny, toothless smile and nods.

“I’m sorry about this.”

“You don’t have to apologize. Just go and get some rest.” 

“I’m gonna sleep on Mingi’s floor in case he yacks on himself.” He rolls his eyes, shutting the bathroom door behind him.

“My pretty baby.” He continues to tug you closer, making grabby hands and being all needy.

“Stop, Joong. Get your shirt off.”

“Why are you mad at me?” He whines as you switch out his shirt.

“Cause you were mad at me for something stupid.” 

“You were taking so long. I just wanted to be with you, but Wooyoung was taking up your time. W-Wouldn’t you feel the same way?” He slurs.

“Ara, too.” You look at him. “You don’t need to get mad at me for things like that, Hongjoong.” You can’t believe you’re having this talk with him while he’s intoxicated. But for whatever reason, you feel like he’ll understand you better this way. He’ll be less mean, less temperamental.

It shouldn’t be that way, though.

“Sorry.” He mumbles as you help him switch into his pajama bottoms. You don’t respond as you quickly wipe down his face with a wet face towel, handing him his toothbrush. “Baby, m’sorry. What more do you want?” He’s only accepting defeat because what else can he do being this vulnerable right now?

“Okay.” You give him what he wants. “Brush your teeth so you can get to bed.” Hongjoong brushes his teeth, grabbing the tiny cup of mouthwash you hand him before guiding him to the bed. He plops down onto his stomach, arm lazily hanging off the edge while you tuck him in. He falls asleep rather quickly, already deep in sleep when you place a water bottle on the nightstand and a trash can near the bed.

You sleep easily throughout the night after that, with the occasional Hongjoong tossing and turning in bed, sitting up to drink water before he’s back to holding you and keeping you close. You feel his lips press against the back of your head and neck a few times, but you don’t budge. Because you’re still upset, yet you’ve pushed it to the back of your mind to take care of him. 

Oh, Hongjoong.

You wish you weren’t so easy to fold when it came to him, your relationship. Hongjoong does so, so well bringing you up; but you’re learning over time and as your relationship goes on, he does so, so well bringing you down, too.

The following morning comes, and Mingi is yacking his brains out in the bathroom. You shrug Hongjoong’s arm off of you before you stretch and slip out of it, Joong way too out of it to even care. By the time you make it outside, Mingi is standing at the bathroom doorway, holding onto his stomach. You ask him if he’s okay and he winces, telling you he’s unsure if he’s got more left in him. You gently push him back to his room to rest before you’re cleaning the bathroom and washing up for the day. You cook a good meal for the boys, arranging a plate for your boyfriend. By the time that you’ve set the food out and cleaned up, Hongjoong is awake, but also struggling to move much.

“God, I’m so fucking hungover.” He mumbles and groans, barely able to look you in the eye.

“Eat.” You set the breakfast on his table.

“You made breakfast?”

“Yeah, cause both you and Mingi sound terrible right now.”

“Baby.” He sits up to drink water before pulling you in between his legs. “Thank you, but you didn’t have to.”

“It’s fine.” You try to push off, but he doesn’t let you go anywhere.

“Hey. I’m sorry about yesterday.”

“It’s fine, Joong.”

“You don’t seem like you’re fine.”

“It’s fine. I’ll text you from now on if I’m gonna be late. I just don’t need you getting mad at me for that.” He hums against your chest and continues to hold you without saying much. So, you stand and wrap your arms around him, letting out a sigh in hopes that all the pent-up frustration would leave, too.

“You’re so good to me.”

“I hope so.” You look down at him, swallowing the lump in your throat. You truly hope you are good to him. At least, you hope he genuinely believes so because it’s so easy to feel like you aren’t, like you aren’t doing enough, especially when Joong gets like that.

Though over time, you believe he meant it, for the most part. Hongjoong is better, but that doesn’t mean the arguments have settled completely. The moments they do spring up, he’s back to his ways of keeping silent and brushing you off, or leaving you behind. He comes back late, slipping into bed before pulling you close and whispering his apologies into your ear.

It’s a never-ending cycle, a circle, but you take it because Joong is what you’ve known, Joong is your other half. You take it because Joong is your home, and that maybe, this was just a silly little phase. Something you two will eventually grow out of.

A little bump in the road, a hill to overcome. As with any relationship.

A weekend full of fun activities eventually makes way, one that universities in your town and neighboring cities always look forward to. It’s the one weekend where all campuses get together for a full day of music, food and friendly competition before partying the night away at a local venue. This year the event was going to be held in the next city over, about an hour drive down. You, Hongjoong and your friends had packed up all your things and drove separately— you with Joong, Wooyoung with Yunho and Ara, San with Mingi.

As soon as you all arrive at the hotel, you unpack and grab dinner before heading to bed for the festivities the next day that started bright and early. You knew you were gonna have tons of fun this weekend, but you didn’t expect it to be the same weekend that you’d be tested; that your relationship would be riding its downhill course yet again.

Your group, along with other familiar faces, stayed during the majority of the day’s events. You and Wooyoung ran into a lot of people you knew growing up, catching up while standing in line for snacks and food, or in between the games happening out on the field. So did Joong.

And he was his usual self, happily introducing you to people you hadn’t met before and vice versa. He kept you to his hip whenever he could, peppering you with kisses, dancing around and having fun like the Hongjoong you first fell in love with. A lot of it felt like old times, like there wasn’t a care in the world. It had just been you and him, through rose-tinted glasses.

When it’s time for the afterparty, you and your friends do a shit ton of pre-gaming before heading out to the venue across the street. The coordinators and the huge security team keep a single file line organized right outside of the doors until opening, allowing the venue to be flooded with people right at 8pm on the dot. You hang onto Joong, afraid you’ll lose him in the sea of people, with your friends around you until you find a good spot on the dance floor. No one wastes any time once you settle on a spot— you working your hips on Hongjoong while he holds you close, while San and Ara are also indulging in each other and Wooyoung is pulling random girls to dance. At some point, Yunho and Mingi run over to grab some drinks for everyone to sip on, the DJ’s setlist continuing to hit all the right spots.

“Baby.” Hongjoong says, arm around your waist while he leans in by your ear. “I’m gonna go find Jisung. He said he just got here.”

“Okay. Tell him I said hi.” He pulls away to look at you and smiles, brushing your hair back.

“I will. Be back? Be good?” He chuckles while you nod, planting a sweet kiss to your lips.

For awhile, Hongjoong is gone long enough that you’re not sure if he ever found Jisung. You start exploring around the dance floor, greeting people you know again before heading off to the spacious hallway that leads to the bathrooms and water fountains. Lots of people are standing around and talking, which makes it a bit harder for you to find him. You eventually do though, and you almost wished you hadn’t at that exact moment, at that exact time.

The exact moment when Tara pulls him in for a hug, keeping her arms around his waist while he looks down at her with a fond smile. He laughs loudly while she continues to talk to him, the grip around his waist clearly not loosening any time soon. He throws an arm around her shoulder and pulls her in for another hug; keeping her there for a bit before she finally pulls back and parts from him. 

You head towards his direction, his eyes instantly landing on you when you get closer. He gives you the same fond smile, before pulling you in and hugging you close. You swear you could still smell her perfume on his clothes and it gives you the ick.

“I didn’t know Tara was here, too.” You say, even though you should’ve expected it with all the schools invited. You should’ve known she was bound to be here, especially with Jisung being around.

“Yeah, and?”

“Nothing, nevermind.”

“No, I know you. What are you catching an attitude about? Because I said hi?” He furrows his brows at you and pulls away.

“It’s not even that—” You’re not even sure how to explain yourself, because how do you tell him she makes you uncomfortable without getting accused of being jealous? You know Hongjoong would instantly get upset, thinking you don’t trust him enough to be around his ex. That’s not the case at all. It’s just something about her that makes you feel.. off, and you can’t exactly put your finger on it. It’s probably the way they’re so up and down sometimes, you can’t tell if Hongjoong wants to keep her in his life or not. It makes you wonder how “awful” their breakup truly was.

But yeah, right now, you are kinda mad about how she hugged him and kept him close. He let that happen, too. 

“Just because she’s here, you wanna ruin a good night? Be for real, Y/N. All you fucking do is trip over stupid shit.” He says, alcohol surely not helping in this case.

“I’m trippin’ over stupid shit?”

“Yeah, you are! It’s so fucking unnecessary when you act like that. I was just catching up with Jisung and Tara happened to come by. I don’t know why you assume so many things right away. Nobody is putting those thoughts in your head, you do that to yourself.” Hongjoong harshly lets go of you before walking off and leaving you in the hallway. Yunho is just leaving the bathroom, catching you standing there with a sadness in your eyes that surely doesn’t fit the environment you guys are in right now. 

“Yo, you okay?” He throws an arm around you and brings you close, having to talk right in your ear because of the music blasting. You look up at him and shake your head, tears pricking your eyes while you sadly stand there with your arms tucked closely to your chest. “Woah, hey. What’s going on?”

“Tara.” Yunho lets out a small sigh as he frowns. He understands the anxiety that builds when she’s around. He knows their full story, and quite frankly, he’s iffy about the whole Tara thing, too. You clearly don’t know, but Yunho can tell your gut is telling you otherwise— that your instincts are making you defensive, making you overthink. He knows how serious their relationship was, but he also knew how much of a rollercoaster it was. How bad the breakup was, how weird they’ve been even post-break up. Hongjoong is a good guy, and he likes to think that he’d be smart enough [and grown enough] to move on from all that mess. “He’s fucking mad at me because I made a big deal out of it. I’m sorry I don’t want her around him.” 

“I’m sorry, that’s totally valid. He’s drunk and he’s being a dick. He’ll realize how stupid he’s being. Let him.” Yunho smiles and gives you a playful pinch on the cheek. “No crying allowed. Let’s go back to the dance floor, okay?”

“Bruh! I’ve been looking everywhere for you.” Wooyoung grabs your wrist when he finally spots you and Yunho. “Don’t you hear the song they’re playing?! It’s our song!” You laugh, letting Yunho and Wooyoung guide you back to the dance floor. Once Yunho and Wooyoung have successfully brought you back to the dance floor, you’re able to brush off your feelings and forget the stupid drama for a bit. Wooyoung dances closely with you [like he always has], playfully singing around and laughing while simultaneously watching the crowd go crazy around you. Being around Wooyoung feels nice because you’re reminded of the good ol’ times. You’re reminded of the times you used to be so, so carefree and so full of life. You’re reminded of the times you didn’t have to worry about a single thing or feel so fucking anxious and frustrated. You’re reminded of the times when you and Wooyoung used to have tons of fun without a single weight on your shoulders.

Well, scratch that. You still do. It’s just a little different now.

During the remaining time you’re at the party, Hongjoong doesn’t return to you even once. And you know he’s hanging out with Jisung. Probably other childhood friends. Definitely Tara. And your suspicions are confirmed when you excuse yourself from dancing with your bestfriend and a few others to grab water, finding Hongjoong laughing and in good spirits with Jisung, Tara and another friend. There’s a look in his eyes when he looks down at her, and it makes your stomach twist.

Of course.

You’re not really sure why that’s the last straw, it’s not like he was doing anything out in the open with her. He would never do anything, you think. Even if you haven’t seen him throughout the night, he would never. But, it’s definitely the fact that he chose to spend his time with them [her] knowing how you felt.

And that shit is fucked up. You’re hurt.

You make contact with him and roll your eyes, shaking your head right before you take a big swig of water and head out the doors. Before you know it, you’re outside, pushing through the random groups lingering to get fresh air. Luckily, the hotel is a short walk across the street. But, you’re not even sure if you should call Wooyoung and take your things into his shared room with Ara and Yunho because you truly don’t want to be around Hongjoong if he was gonna be like that.

“Fuck.” Hongjoong mumbles to himself. Jisung follows his eyes, watching as you storm out of the venue alone.

“Uh, is she good?” Tara can’t help but look over either, heart sinking when she realizes Hongjoong is about to run after you. Because yeah, she has history with him, and she knows deep down that part of Hongjoong still has a grip on it. Just like she does.

“I’ll catch up with you later, alright?” Is all Hongjoong says before bidding them farewell to chase after you.

“Of course.”

“Tara.” Jisung gently scolds her through his tone. “I know that shit has always been complicated, but I need you to let him be.”

“Okay, Jisung. I’m not even saying anything. It’s just annoying how we can’t even be friends.”

“It’s never just that with you two and you know it.” She looks at Jisung and remains quiet, not having a rebuttal.

She knows, she knows.

Meanwhile, Hongjoong pauses in his steps and searches for your familiar figure. More people have piled outside, making it a bit harder for him to navigate through the crowds. Once he leaves the entrance and finds himself on the street, he sees you nearing the crosswalk.

“Baby, baby.” You hear Hongjoong behind you, footsteps getting louder as he picks up his pace to catch up with you. “Baby, wait. I’m sorry.” He repeats when he grabs your wrist, but you’re quick to snatch it out of his grip.

“Hongjoong, go back to the party. Looks like you were having a fucking blast anyway.”

“No, I don’t want to.” He attempts to grab you again but you’ve moved out of his reach.

“And I don’t want you here.” You sharply look at him. “Just go back with your friends. I’m sure Tara’s looking for you, too.”

“I don’t give a fuck! I wanna be with you.” 

“If you actually wanted to spend time with me, then you would’ve done that a long time ago.” You feel the tears threatening to spill from your bottom lid as you continue to walk across the street to the hotel. You keep your distance from Hongjoong, genuinely wanting to be alone and away from him for a moment— but he doesn’t understand and he won’t. Because he’s selfish, and the moment he realizes you’re slipping from his grip, he panics. 

Saying and throwing everything your way just to get you calm, to not have you be mad. 

“I didn’t mean to get upset at you, it’s just frustrating—”

“I really don’t wanna do this right now, okay? I left alone for a reason.”

“Can you just listen to me for a second?”

“I don’t want to!” You push away from him once again, picking up your pace. “Hongjoong, just go back to your friends. For the love of god, I don’t wanna be around you right now. You fucking knew how I felt about the entire thing yet you still spent time with her and your friends. And you got mad at me for voicing those feelings! God forbid I feel that way about her.” You snap. “I don’t wanna do this anymore. I’m so fucking tired of fighting with you, all we do is—” He comes around and tries to stop you in your tracks, hands on your arms as he tries to pull you close.

“No, baby. You don’t mean that. I’m trying here! What do you want me to do?!” His voice slightly raises.

“You’re trying?! Funny cause you had hella shit to say to me at the party. Don’t try and flip the switch now.”

“I didn’t mean it, fuck!” He groans, attempting to stop you from walking any further again. His tone is loud enough to catch the attention of a couple walking past, eyes fixed on the scene until Hongjoong lowers his voice. “I just got frustrated and I’m sorry, okay? Please don’t leave. Let me make this up to you.”

“You don’t even know what the hell you’re sorry for!” You continue to raise your voice before storming up into the lobby, straight to the elevators.

“Yes I do!”  He rushes into the elevator with you, and you tuck yourself into the corner. But of course, in a very typical Hongjoong manner, he cages you in, hands resting on the rails while his face barely ghosts yours. “I fucked up, and I didn’t mean to discredit your feelings. I want you to know that I don’t care about Tara. That shit is all in the past. It gets frustrating because I would never do anything to lose you, Y/N. I just need you to trust me. Why don’t you trust me?”

“Joong, I don’t get why you can’t just cut her off. She’s your ex for a reason. I don’t understand it. I just don’t feel comfortable with it, and I’m sorry—”

“I know, baby. If you want me to cut her off, I will. I wanna make up for this and prove it to you.” You let out a breath. “No one else matters to me.” Silence. You aren’t really sure what to say. What can you say? Was it wrong for you to ask him to cut her off?

If not, why do you feel guilty about it? Why do you feel so fucking wrong for doing that? For making it a ‘big deal,’ for voicing your uncomfortability?

“You didn’t have to come after me and miss the party.” You don’t really know what else to say. You’re tired and you’re over it, so you do what you do best in these scenarios: try to physically push him away from you and keep him at bay.

“Stop pushing me away. Baby, please.” He shakes his head and almost whines, cupping your face. “I don’t care about the party. I don’t care about any of them. Why can’t you trust me?” And it’s that stupid fucking look Hongjoong gives you that makes you melt, makes you weak in the knees. He looks at you in a way that reassures you, in a way that tells you how special you are; a way that says you’re mine and only mine.

And it gets you every single time. 

You let out a shaky breath when his thumb caresses the surface, lips a few inches away from yours.

“Don’t push me away. I’m sorry, I’ll make this better. You can trust me.” He repeats. You don’t respond besides a simple nod, giving him leverage to press a chaste kiss to your lips as the elevator doors open. 

Hongjoong is home to you, which is why you trust him to make it better, to keep you safe.

That night, Hongjoong takes you into the room and shows you his way of making up for it, of taking care of you, of showing you all that matters is you. You slip into the shower, eventually letting Joong join and take you inside. He carefully calculates every move, every kiss, every touch; making sure to whisper and mark your skin with his repeated apologies. And it doesn’t stop there, no. You get yourself ready for bed, throwing on one of Joong’s shirts before slipping under the covers. He shuts off the lights when he’s finished, getting in next to you. Innocent cuddles and kisses eventually turn into Joong taking you from behind; pounding into you while he pulls your hair and whispers sweet nothings in your ear.

No one else matters to me.

You’re perfect.

Made for me.

My good girl.

And you take it all, letting the love consume you all over again. Because for a while after this, things felt beautiful again. You felt like you were back in your honeymoon-cloud nine phase with Hongjoong— sharing laughs and jokes, holding each other close while kissing each other every chance you get. He’d make love to you like the last day on Earth was tomorrow, souls intertwining and never wanting to be apart from you.

Things were good, until they weren’t.

There comes a day when you realize he hasn’t actually cut Tara off, and your anxiety spikes again. There comes a day when all those shitty feelings return, and it makes you question if there was any meaning behind everything Hongjoong said, did.

You sat on Hongjoong’s bed, reading through a chapter of a book for class. He’s out in the hallway grabbing his clothes from the dryer when his phone dings a few times, your eyes shooting to the screen sitting on the nightstand. You used to think it was kinda nice that Hongjoong always set his text previews to show up no matter what. Maybe it was a weird way of showing you that he didn’t have anything to hide, maybe it was a way of showing you that you didn’t need to question anything.

Now, you’re not so sure how to feel about it.

tara: hey. is it okay if i swing by and hang out with you guys?

tara: my aunt passed, and i just want to be away from home.

You do feel a bit bad for her. Losing a loved one is never easy, and she is good friends with San and Mingi, too. But, where is Jisung? Where are her other friends? Surely she has other friends she can rely on, right? You can’t help but fix on the funny feeling and the anxiety that bubbles in your gut seeing her name— anything to do with her. You’re not sure what it is, but Tara unsettles you, and you know it’s for a reason. Your instincts are telling you so.

“Who is it?” You flash his phone his way, a small frown on your lips.

“So much for cutting her off, Hongjoong.”

“I’m not even planning to respond to her.”

“Not my point.”

“I know you aren’t getting mad at me over some unanswered texts. I haven’t even talked to Tara since that night.” He glares at you. But if he hadn’t talked to her since that night, what makes her think it’s okay to ask for something like this?

“Why would you tell me you’d cut her off if you weren’t actually planning on doing so? And why do you sound so mad about it?” You’re tired of doing this, going in circles, having to explain your feelings over and over again.

“Oh my god.” He huffs. “We’re really at this again?”

“Because you don’t get it. It just feels weird.” 

“Mm, when I haven’t done anything.” He drops the basket onto the floor. “Since you wanna talk about ‘weird’ and bring this shit up again, what’s been going on with you and Wooyoung then?”

“Are you actually kidding me right now?” You scoff. “You’re not serious.”

“You know, I saw you that night of the party. The two of you dancing hella close. I’ve seen the way he is with you lately, too.”

“Wow.” You laugh pathetically because what is actually going on? Wooyoung had never been an issue, at least, Hongjoong has never vocalized it. Nor has Joong ever given you signs that he was becoming a problem. “You know we’re just close like that. It’s actually unbelievable that you’re comparing him to Tara right now.”

“Oh, bullshit! You expect me to believe that? That’s the shit that feels weird.” Hongjoong yells.

“Yes!” You match his tone. “Because we’ve been together for how long?! You know this. Why are you all of a sudden making this an issue? Wooyoung was never a problem—“

“To you, maybe.”

“And that’s my fault, how?! I can’t read your mind, Joong. You never told me you had issues about it.” You groan. “He’s just one of my best friends. I don’t know how else I’m supposed to prove that to you. I don’t know what you want me to say.”

“Then, what the hell was he doing being all up on you? Leaning into your ear like that. Holding you close. Too fucking close.”

“We’ve always been that way! This isn’t anything new, and you know there isn’t a meaning behind it!” You yell, but you’re quick to crawl back into your shell when Hongjoong tosses a dish into the sink harshly before walking away from the kitchen. 

“Right.” He starts walking towards his bedroom and you follow behind. “It’s crazy how you make a big deal out of Tara when I keep her at a distance. I don’t do anything to make you uncomfortable, I make sure there’s clear boundaries.”

“That’s not the same, and you know it. Her being around is uncomfortable enough.”

“How is it different?”

“You’re kidding, right?” You cross your arms. “She wants to get back with you so fucking badly, Joong! How can you not see that? She doesn’t care about me, and you apparently don’t either!”

“Oh, I don’t? I cut her off like you asked me to even though there really wasn’t anything going on between us. Shit was fucking crazy to me, but I did it anyway.”

“What exactly does ‘cutting her off’ mean to you? Because she continues to call you and text you, asking you to be there for her when she has so many other people she can turn to. Why does it always have to be you saving the day? You just let it happen, too! You clearly would see her and let her visit when she needs you. You two aren’t together anymore!”

“So, how is this different from Wooyoung? Because every time something happens, you run to him. You ask for him all the time, you call and text him when you need someone. You choose him all the time.”

“No, I don’t! He’s not my ex-boyfriend, this is just how we are. I’ve known him for so long, he would never disrespect you. Why on earth would you ever think of us in that way? This is different because you and your ex have history. She obviously still loves you, and wants to continue feeling close to you. As soon as you’re vulnerable, she wants to swoop in and show you that she’s always been there. You don’t get it!”

“Fine, I don’t!” But Hongjoong does, he’s just matching your energy and the way you fire back makes him want to fire back even more. He yells and he slams his hand against the wall, making you flinch. He’s heated just as much as you are— it’s all in the heat of the moment. “If I ever asked you to cut Wooyoung off, would you?”

“No. I don’t have a reason to. That’s unfair and you know it.” He scoffs as he throws on his jacket and grabs his keys.

“Okay, whatever. Fuck this then.” He says, just as San and Mingi walk into the apartment— pausing mid-conversation at the chaos going on.

“That’s it?” You pause. “Hongjoong.”

“I don’t know what you want me to say to you, Y/N. I gave you what you wanted.”

“And I am too, I’ve been trying to tell you that you shouldn’t worry about Wooyoung.”

“And yet it still feels like you’d choose him over me if it ever came down to it!” His hand hits the wall and it causes you to step back.

“Woah, hold on. Hongjoong—'' Mingi cuts in when he hears Hongjoong yelling at you, also slightly appalled at the topic behind the argument. 

“Why do I even have to choose?!” You begin to cry more, aggressively wiping at your tears. He gives you one last look before he’s heading towards his shoes. “Hongjoong.” You call for him. “Where are you going?” He slides into his shoes, still not sparing you a look. “Hongjoong!”

“For a drive.” Is all he says before he’s heading out and slamming the door in your face. Mingi sighs as he sets his things down and tries to race after Hongjoong, while San sits you down and throws an arm around you to console you.

“What happened?”

“He’s getting mad at me cause Tara texted him.” San sighs. “Started talking about Wooyoung.”

He shakes his head. “I’m sorry Y/N, let him cool down.” You don’t say anything because you’re sick of fighting and you’re sick of his friends, your friends, genuinely apologizing on his behalf. It should have never gotten this deep, and your friends shouldn’t have to be involved. Yet, here they are. “He’s being a hothead. I know how you feel, and you shouldn’t have to explain the situation with Wooyoung after all this time.”

“Sannie, I’m so tired.” You cry into your hands. You truly are tired. You feel exhausted from this rollercoaster you’ve been riding for months. You’re not sure if Hongjoong feels too comfortable, or if he’s just losing sight of who you are to him, what this relationship means to him. And that is an awful feeling. “I’m so done fighting with him.”

“I know.” He rubs your arm and gives you a gentle squeeze. “Hongjoong just needs to realize how lucky he is to have someone like you by his side. For real. You do everything for him and you’re always there for him. I know he’s appreciative but he just needs to do better.” He lets out a breath. “We’ll try to talk some sense into him. Why don’t you lie down and get some rest?” You shake your head.

“I’m gonna go home.”

“Want me to drive you?”

“I’m gonna call Woo.” He nods, letting you go to give you some space. “Thank you, Sannie.”

“Of course.” He gives you a small, half-hearted smile. He feels terrible. He truly wishes Hongjoong would stop being so mean sometimes. It’s true; he does have a temper but it’s unfair for him to unload that on you for every little thing, every little inconvenience. You had been nothing but good and patient. Understanding.

“Yo?” Wooyoung picks up as you pack up your things.

“Woo, are you free right now? Can you come get me from Hongjoong’s?”

“Yeah, sure. You okay?”

“I don’t know.”

“I’ll be there in 10.” And with that, you hang up the call and continue to pack your things. Hongjoong and Mingi haven’t returned, and you’re relieved you don’t have to go explaining yourself if he were to walk in at this moment. Wooyoung arrives sharply in 10 minutes, texting you to come outside. You bid San farewell and hug him tightly, telling him to let Hongjoong know you’ve gone home if he ever asks. He simply nods before watching you leave, releasing a deep sigh as he heads to his room.

The car ride is quiet simply because Wooyoung can tell you’re having a bad night. The thing with Wooyoung [which is why he’s your bestfriend] is that he knows when he just needs to hold space for you and let you be in your peace. He doesn’t ask any questions, he doesn’t hound you for attention. He just lets you be the entire ride home. It’s not until you start breaking down again that he finally feels ready to ask, especially because he hates seeing you this way.

“Y/N, what is it?” Wooyoung lets out a breath when he sees you breaking down in the passenger’s seat. “Come on, let’s get inside first. Okay?” He says, hand coming to rub your back. You don’t respond so Wooyoung takes it upon himself to step out first before coming to your aid on the passenger’s side. He crouches to your level and unbuckles the seatbelt, wiping your tears away before getting you to walk to the apartment. He heads to the kitchen to grab you some water while you change and get into bed.

Wooyoung hears you quietly sniffling and crying to yourself, and he knows he can’t just leave you here like this. So, he places the water down, slips into your bed and holds you, telling you that things will be okay. To anyone, this probably would’ve looked incredibly wrong, and Hongjoong probably would’ve beaten his ass if he knew. But he doesn’t care; because Wooyoung will always do anything for you, especially after all the times you’ve dropped everything to be there for him without asking for shit in return. He cherishes you as his bestfriend and he will always put you first—

That goes to say, Wooyoung would never disrespect Hongjoong. He knows better than that, and if Hongjoong had a problem with him, he’d gladly talk it out and reassure him. Well, he’d at least hope Hongjoong was grown enough to do that.

But if not, then he thinks that's his own damn problem and his own damn fault for assuming and putting shit into his own head. Wooyoung has known you for so long that things like this— platonically laying in bed, consoling and being there for each other— comes so naturally. It doesn’t mean he’s trying to make a move on you [god, no], everyone knows that.

Except Hongjoong, I guess. It’s funny how he tries to flip the script on you when he knows exactly what he’s doing.

It’s kinda stupid, Wooyoung thinks. He should really know better after dating you for over a year at this point. He should really know better, period.

Right now though, you need him and that’s what he’s here for. He continues to quietly shush you and ease you to sleep, phone constantly vibrating and going off on the table. It’s not until he hears your soft snores that he carefully moves to grab your phone and attempt to turn it off, eyes glancing over Hongjoong’s texts and missed call notifications.

hongjoong: where are you?

hongjoong: y/n

hongjoong: assuming you’re with wooyoung

hongjoong: wow really, y/n? after tonight, too? of course you’d run straight to wooyoung

hongjoong: fuck this, whatever

Wooyoung scoffs to himself a bit, the audacity of Hongjoong for being so fucking upset over nothing. Don’t get him wrong. Wooyoung loves seeing you happy. It’s all he wants. And he loved Hongjoong for you. He really did. He thought you two were perfect and actually made for each other.

But, over time, he’s starting to question his thoughts, if he still stands in the same place he did a year ago. Because all this crying, this back and forth, nights of having to come save you; he sees you slowly changing. The light in your eyes dimming. Life slowly being sucked out of you. You aren’t the same bright, fun, loud Y/N you used to be and Wooyoung hates it when he really thinks about it. As the cherry on top [which Wooyoung also hates to admit], everything is becoming way too unhealthy. It’s the way that Hongjoong’s temper gets the best of him, the way all of your friends get involved one way or another. The way this will probably blow over tomorrow, and you and Hongjoong will go about your day like nothing happened.

What’s gonna be left of this?

What’s gonna be left of you?

Wooyoung feels his own phone vibrate, and it’s a text from Yunho. Granted, he kinda saw this coming. But again, he hates that this is what your relationship has become.

yunho: is y/n with you? hongjoong’s wondering where she’s at

wooyoung: where the fuck else would she be?

wooyoung: she’s at home, sleeping

wooyoung: had to pick her up cause she called crying after their argument

yunho: they fought again? over what?

wooyoung: idk but reading his texts, it sounds like part of it was about me

yunho: wtf why? i dont get it?

wooyoung: you and me both

yunho: alright well ill let him know shes safe and asleep. text me if u need me

wooyoung: thanks

wooyoung: also, tell him he can ask me directly next time. i’m not hiding anything, nor is y/n. bold of him to assume shit

He lets out a hefty sigh before setting his phone aside and slipping deeper into your covers, turning onto his side to give you some space.

When the following morning comes, Wooyoung wakes up to your hand on his arm as you reach over to grab your phone. He groans a bit, tugging on the sheets while you sit up and read through Hongjoong’s texts from last night.

“Fucking idiot.” He hears you mutter. As much as he wants to sleep in a little more, he can’t help but worry about you. So, he turns over and sees your fingers pinching at your bottom lip while you continue to read the texts— obvious the tears are building up the more that you do.

“Y/N, what the hell did you guys fight about last night?”

“It was so stupid.”

“Yeah, you’ve said that before.” You look at him and drop your phone, head resting back against the headboard.

“It started because Tara texted him asking if she could swing by for some company since her aunt passed. I got mad at him for it because I swear to god, she’s trying so hard to get back with him and he just lets it happen. I know he’d continue to help her and be there for her even though she has other friends she can rely on. Why does it have to be Hongjoong every fucking time?” You groan, tears already streaming down your cheeks. “And then he started attacking me about you, a-and—” You cry. “It’s unfair. It’s not the same, I don’t know why he’s suddenly making an issue about us or whatever, but it’s not the same and I thought he knew that. He was making me choose, saying I’d probably choose you at the end of the day and that I—”

“What a piece of shit.” Wooyoung says before sitting up and pulling you into a hug. “Nah, I get it. You don’t have to explain the rest.”

“It’s so stupid. Why would he say that when he knows it’s not the same? Tara’s his ex-girlfriend, why doesn’t he see it the way I do?”

“Because he knows he’s wrong and he doesn’t wanna admit it, Y/N. He’s looking for other things to pick at and blame. Deflecting.”

“I’m so done with him getting mad at me like this. I asked him to cut her off for a reason.” You pull away from him and wipe the remaining tears from your face. “I asked him to cut her off because she clearly didn’t give a fuck about me or our relationship. That girl knows no boundaries. She makes me feel anxious and I fucking hate it.”

“And you were right to do so.” You sigh.

“I feel like I’m never winning with him anymore.” You say quietly, defeatedly. “It just never feels like enough.”

“Don’t say shit like that. You’re doing more than enough, he’s just being dumb.” He sighs. “Are you going to talk to him?”

“I don’t know. Maybe later. I just need a moment to myself, I guess.”

“Take your time with it. Talk to him when you’re ready. Don’t let him determine that for you.”

“I know. Thanks for last night.” He gives you a small smile.

“I got you, always. And for the record, I know you’d choose me in the end.”

“Shut up.” You chuckle as you wipe at the stragglers running down your cheeks before pushing him out of your bed.

“Ow.” He pouts and whines. “Why would you hurt me?”

“I need to shower.”

“You should.” You smack him upside the head when you finally stand from your bed and grab a set of new clothes. 

“Are you at least feeling better?”

“Kinda? Sleep did me well for sure.”

“It’s cause of me.”

“Wooyoung, I will—” He bites you on the shoulder with a loud laugh, causing you to yell and curse at him this early in the morning. Luckily, your roommate wasn’t home and was off at her internship. But goodness, does your bestfriend drives you nuts. Can’t live with him, can’t live without him.

Once Wooyoung leaves, you take a bit more time just to be in your own peace. You deep clean your room and the rest of the apartment, while playing some soft music in the background. Hongjoong’s call is what interrupts the music coming through your bluetooth speakers, sighing as you disconnect it and pick up the call. He asks if he can come over and talk, and you agree to let him swing by. You aren’t feeling 100% but you are feeling better enough to try and talk to him.

It doesn’t take more than 15 minutes before Hongjoong is walking through your door, kicking off his shoes and setting his wallet and keys off to the side of the dining table. He finds you sorting through some extra prints you’ve kept hidden in your desk drawer, your back turned to him even as he walks in and greets you.

“Hey.” Is all he says, sitting on the edge of your bed.

“Hi.” You turn to him, setting the prints aside.

“Hanging up more?”

“I don’t know yet. I bought these awhile ago and they’ve been sitting in my drawer. I need to figure out how I wanna put them up.” He leans back on his hands and nods. Even throughout all the stupid shit you and Hongjoong have been fighting about, you still find him to be the most handsome, the most charming; it truly makes your heart flutter every time you see him. He’s in a plain white tee and sweats, hair freshly washed and still a bit damp. The tattoo on his arm is poking out from underneath his sleeve and it drives you insane how attractive your boyfriend is.

“Mm.” He hums. “Did you sleep well?”

“Slept well enough.” You look at him. “What about you?”

“I slept alright. Was worried about where you were at.”

“I wouldn’t be anywhere else but my place, Joong. You know that.”

“With Wooyoung?” You look at him and let out a sigh, crossing your arms as you feel the anger within you grow again.

“Look, if you came here to argue some more, I don’t—”

“I’m not here to argue. I asked a simple question, Y/N.”

“Yes, he was here. But I don’t see why that would be an issue compared to Tara asking to come over.” He licks his lips, but he doesn’t say anything. Just nods. 

“She just needs her friends.”

“So do I, but you don’t see me leaning on my ex for that kind of company.” 

“We were good friends before we even dated.”

“But you dated, and that’s the shit she’s holding onto. As with anybody.” You roll your eyes. “I guess you did come here to argue.” He shakes his head.

“No. Forget it, I’m sorry.” Is all he says.

“Sorry for what?” You hate that you always have to ask him this because lately, it’s been feeling like he doesn’t even know what he’s apologizing for. Like he’s just apologizing to apologize and move past it. “You do understand where I’m coming from, right? Tara’s your ex-girlfriend and I asked you to cut her off for a reason. Wooyoung and I have been bestfriends for years, and we’ve never been anything more than that. We’re just used to being there for each other and having each other’s backs. It’s natural for us. It doesn’t always have to have a hidden meaning, Hongjoong. Don’t make me choose because it’s not the same thing. Why would you do that? Why would you get upset at me for assuming when you’re doing the same thing about my bestfriend?”

“I hear you. I truthfully don’t wanna fight about this anymore.” He runs his hand through his hair. “I cut her off, alright? Told her she couldn’t do that and expect me to be there for her anymore.” He lets out a heavy sigh as if it was a chore to do, as if he didn’t want to but had no choice.

“Hm.” You hum. It’s not that you don’t trust him, you just don’t trust her. But part of you has also begun to wonder if you could truly be comfortable with his responses— if you could sit back and relax, take it for what it is. It’s complicated. Too complicated for something that started off so simple and beautiful. So beautifully simple.

“Baby.” He calls you as he stands. “Can you come here, please? Look at me.”

“Hongjoong, I just don’t know what to say.” He holds you by the waist, hand on the small of your back while he kisses your forehead, temple.

“Trust me.” He slightly frowns. “I need you to trust me because I would never do anything to lose you, remember? Baby, nothing else matters.” 

“Then trust me. Wooyoung would never disrespect you like that and I thought you knew that.” He nods.

“Yeah, I know. I was just upset.” He kisses you on the lips. “I’ll do better.”

And since that moment, Hongjoong was better. Really better. The feelings you felt during the beginning of your relationship with Hongjoong felt like they’ve returned. Hongjoong was good, so, so good to you— it was easy to trust him again and feel safe. He worked on building a safer space for you after the back and forth about Tara, making you feel like he truly understood you and wanted this relationship to flourish like it used to. He cared about you, and he loved you.

Little did you know that this would all come crumbling down in the future. All of it.

The hope that this would eventually pass, that it was just a bump in the road, dwindled when Hongjoong had reverted to his old ways—

You should’ve known it wouldn’t last.

But it breaks you, constantly breaks you, because at this point, you’re convinced it’ll never change. 

Not anymore.

“Wooyoung’s graduation party is that weekend. He had to push it out so his family could travel over.” You say, washing your bowl in the sink before plopping back down on the couch with him.

“So you’re not gonna come with me to Jisung’s graduation?”

“I’m sorry, I can’t.”

“Can’t you at least stop by then go to Wooyoung’s?”

“No, because I told his parents I’d help get everything together, Joong.” You furrow your brows because you already know he’s angry, even though this has absolutely nothing to do with him.

“Alright.” Is all he says, continue to scroll through his phone.

“You’re not mad, are you?”

“I mean, I just wanted you to come along for a bit. I don’t understand why can’t do that, but I guess it’s cause of Wooyoung.” He looks at you again. “I should’ve expected that.”

“Hongjoong.” You call his name with a certain tone, one that says you don’t wanna revisit this so-called issue again.

“What, am I wrong?” He chuckles, but there’s an obvious drip of anger, of venom, in it. “Do you, Y/N.”

“Why are you being like that? I thought you would’ve understood by now.”

“Yeah, I have. It was always going to be Wooyoung anyway, so what the fuck is the point?” 

“Why are we back here again? Why do I have to keep explaining myself to you? It’s not that I don’t wanna go to Jisung’s, I just promised Wooyoung and his parents I’d be there.”

“I’m sure an hour or so wouldn’t hurt.”

“Oh my god.” You run your hands through your hair and get up from the couch, heading into his room. “I know that’s not what you’re really trying to get at.”

“It’s true though, right? You’re just choosing Wooyoung like you always do. You’re right, maybe I should just stop because in the end it doesn’t matter. I always put you first, I do everything for you and I always take you into consideration. Everything is about you, and you never do the same—”

“I never do the same?!” You match his tone. The disbelief running through you is unbearable. You’re just not sure how Hongjoong has the audacity to say something like that when you’re always thinking about him and putting your own feelings aside to keep him happy.

But you would never hang that over his head like he does with you.

“You know that’s not true! I appreciate everything you do for me, but you don’t get to hang it over my head like that because I would never do that to you. I would never make you feel guilty about the things I do for you, or make you feel like you’re an obligation.”

“You make me feel that way all the time!” He yells. “You don’t even realize how much you do.”

“Oh, because of Tara? So sorry that was such a fucking tragedy for you!” He groans loudly before hitting the wall.

“For real, fuck this. Count me out of your graduation, too. I’m not doing this shit.”

“Hongjoong, what the fuck is your problem? My own graduation?”

“I don’t wanna do this anymore, Y/N! What the fuck is the point!” He repeats. The words cut through you like a sharp knife because damn, you weren’t expecting that out of this.

“Okay, you know what, Joong. I’m not gonna keep arguing about this with you. Do whatever the hell you want, call me selfish, whatever. I made a promise to my bestfriend and his family and I’m not going back on my word.” You pack up your things and head out the door, not taking one look at him.

“Yeah, whatever. Done with this bullshit.” He slams his room door, causing the walls to shake.

You cried when you got home that evening, but you weren’t crying because of the shit he said, the things he pulled, no. You were crying because you were exhausted and you felt like you had nothing left in you anymore. You didn’t have the energy to keep fighting back, you didn’t have the energy to explain yourself. You shouldn’t have to, and you don’t want to.

Was it wrong to turn down Jisung’s graduation for your bestfriend?

When you said you had no energy, you truly meant it, and Hongjoong clearly did, too. The both of you hadn’t texted or called, let alone seen each other in those two weeks. You weren’t really sure what Hongjoong was up to, but you couldn’t think about much while wrapping up senior year and getting ready for graduation around the corner. Maybe the break was needed, maybe you two really needed the space.

You honestly would’ve thought this was the end of you two. 

He manages to prove you and everyone wrong again when he shows up to your graduation, with a big bouquet in hand. Wooyoung nudges you when he catches him across the street, walking over with San, Mingi, Jisung and a few other of their guy friends [who are probably here for Yunho]. He’s dressed in a dark grey short-sleeve dress shirt that’s loosely tucked into his black slacks with black boots. Your parents catch him on their way over to the field to get to their seats, pulling him into a tight hug before pointing over at you, Wooyoung, Ara and Yunho. Your parents [or his] never really knew the extent of your fights, which is why everything seems so fine and dandy in their eyes. Rose-tinted glasses, glitter and gold.

“Congrats!” San yells, hugging all of you before Mingi and the rest make their way around the group.

“You’re here.” You look at him with a slight fondness in your eyes because even though the past weeks have been a mess, Hongjoong still makes you weak. He gives you a tiny smile before pulling you in for a tight hug.

“I missed you. I’m sorry.” He mumbles against your temple before giving you a kiss. “Congrats, my pretty girl.” He tilts your chin up to press a kiss against your lips. 

“Thank you, Joong.” He gives you another chaste kiss to the temple before they bid their farewells and rush to the field, the commencement ceremony scheduled to start in a few minutes. 

It was a hot day, but nonetheless, a happy day. You felt happy finally getting through college and graduation with your bestfriends alongside of you. Your parents and Hongjoong stand near the stage to snap photos of you as you walk across and grab your diploma, the crowd roaring in celebration. After the ceremony, you, your friends, their families and loved ones all take hours to take photos together before agreeing to eat at a nearby restaurant together for a small, but intimate way to close the day. You would have never known that things had gone awry with you and Hongjoong with the way he lovingly held you, kissed you, kept you close. Though deep down, it was still hurtful to know that this wouldn’t last. That you’d have to accept the fact that this was only temporary.

Hongjoong’s graduation followed the next weekend, and you ended up heading to Jisung’s for a bit before helping with Wooyoung’s party. Wooyoung didn’t really like the idea, and you had apologized for going back on your promise of sticking with him throughout the entire party. But it happened anyway, even if Hongjoong dropped you off to head to Jisung’s party without you.

As long as you were okay, as long as you had stopped crying and feeling so shitty, Wooyoung was okay. Even though he really couldn’t stand what this had become.

But if Wooyoung could save your world from crumbling just a little bit longer, he’ll do that. 

Fuck the rest.

—CURRENT

“My birthday baby.” Hongjoong squeezes at your hips before biting onto his bottom lip, eyes ogling your dress and how it hugs you in all the right places, fits perfectly over your curves.

“Hi.” You smile up at him, hands lazily hanging around his neck.

“You’re so beautiful, love.” He says softly, kissing the tip of your nose before moving down to your lips. Jaw. Neck. You giggle in his grip, gently pushing him back by the chest. “I love you.”

“Thank you. I love you, too.” You smile lovingly at him.

“Ready to go? I think everyone’s waiting for the birthday girl to arrive.” You laugh and nod, letting him lead the way to his car.

You and Hongjoong had a good talk about your relationship and where things stood, being able to communicate properly about your needs, wants, giving each other space and letting the other be their own person. There was a tiny conversation about his current status with Tara, and he vaguely told you that they were back to being friends but he swore up and down that it was just.. that. He told you honestly that he wasn’t sure why he had to cut her off when there wasn’t anything going on between them, and that he felt like he didn’t need to. That you needed to trust him and he’d have no problem reassuring you.

So, that was it. And it worked well. It was a bit of adjustment at first, but you knew giving Hongjoong the space he needed was crucial— just as it was for you. You had stopped coming along to every single party or hangout back at home, only seeing his parents from time to time unless they visited Joong at his apartment. It was the same with your family; yet again, none of them knowing what kind of rollercoaster had gone on in your relationship during the past two years.

They just took it as you two evolving in your relationship, keeping things healthy. Alive.

They barely knew about all the nights you cried, you yelled, breaking dishes and cups; having Wooyoung come and save you while Hongjoong stormed off.

You suppose it’s better that way. In the end, you two were still growing and learning. Maybe.

You ended up renting a small studio in the heart of the city after snagging a job right after graduation. Hongjoong and San moved into another place of their own, while Mingi moved back home to help his family and work for their company while he continued his job search. Wooyoung also lived in the heart of the city, renting an in-law while he worked his part-time job and internship at a bigger company. Everything seemed to be going well for everyone, and you couldn’t have asked for more at this point. It seemed too good at one point, but you weren’t going to dwell on it; taking everything for what it is.

The club you decided to celebrate your birthday at is packed with people, but you’re able to easily slip in since Wooyoung, Hongjoong and the rest of your friends chipped in for a VIP table. The DJ was already blasting his music, while you and your friends were off to a quick start with shots. It didn’t take long before you were drunk and dancing the night away with everyone, with Hongjoong— sharing cute, affectionate moments in between. It’s not until he steps away with San to grab another drink at the bar that Mingi swoops you away and playfully dances around with you for a bit; this being the very moment when everything changed.

When your world came crumbling down in one quick, swift motion.

“Dude, to be honest.” Mingi lazily keeps his arm around your shoulder while leaning in towards your ear. “I didn’t know if you and Hongjoong would actually make it through.”

“We had our rough patches, Mangi. I wasn’t sure what things would look like either, but we’re here.” You smile at him and he laughs.

“I know, I know. It’s just.. he had been with Tara a lot. It was confusing.” You furrow your brows at him. “But, I’m glad you two are okay and back to being good. Like.. I’m glad he’s with you. I know he can be dumb but I’m glad it’s you. You’re good for him, sometimes I don’t think he realizes it.” You’re a little appalled at the stuff coming out of Mingi’s mouth, and half of you wants to blame it all on the alcohol. Though, you know you can’t because where on earth would Mingi come up with this? Shit doesn’t just form out of thin air.

“Uh, yeah. I hope so.” Is all you respond with before he pinches your cheek and leaves.

“There she is.” Hongjoong finds you in the crowd, another glass in his hand. “Taste this, it’s so good.” You sip on the drink and nod in approval.

“Thanks, babe.” He gives you a look.

“You okay, baby girl?” 

“Yeah, I’m good.” You swallow the lump in your throat. “Have you seen Ara? I need to go to the bathroom.”

“Are you sure you’re okay?” His tilts your chin up.

“Yeah, I just really need to pee and freshen up.” He slowly nods.

“She’s with San over there.” He points behind you, where you find Ara and San flirting around like they always do. “Seems kinda busy though? I can wait for you outside the bathroom.”

“No Joong, it’s fine. I’ll be alright. I’ll be quick.” You give him a small smile, and he finally lets up with a quick kiss to your forehead and a quick ass-grab. You interrupt San and Ara, letting them know you need her to accompany you to the bathroom. She agrees, linking her arm with yours, but just like Wooyoung, she can tell something else is wrong. Who knows, maybe Hongjoong is onto you too, but you could care less because you don’t know how to confront him about this.

Nor do you want to on your birthday.

“My birthday girl! Are you drunk enough? Why do you look so sober?”

“It’s nothing.” She looks at you and holds you close to her side. “I just need some space.” Quite frankly, you just need her company more than anything. You just need somebody other than Hongjoong.

“Why? Did something happen with Hongjoong?”

“Mm, no.” You lie. You lie to her, you lie to yourself. You lie and you lie in hopes that it’ll ease the pain slowly seeping into your body, in hopes it’ll somehow make things easier for you to accept the harsh reality of your relationship.

Of your home.

“You sure? Do you wanna sneak out of here and go back to my place? You can tell me anything, you know that, right?” You nod. “Or do you want me to get Woo?”

“No, no. It’s okay. I’m just gonna freshen up and head back out there. Thanks for coming with me.” She smiles and squeezes your arm as you two move to the front of the bathroom line.

“Of course, my love!” She chuckles. “I’m glad you did because I didn’t realize how badly I needed to pee.” You laugh, resting your head against hers until a stall opens up for you two to squeeze in and share.

The rest of the night, you’re distancing yourself from Hongjoong enough so that you can still enjoy the night, but not keep him too close. It’s fucking painful to hear Mingi’s words repeatedly in your head, and even though you don’t have concrete evidence to back it up, you already know it’s not needed. You just know, and that is the worst feeling. And this— this is the same gut-wrenching anxiety that you’ve always felt every time she was around, every time you saw her name randomly pop up. It’s the same feeling in your gut, the same feeling that was telling you something was wrong,

Hongjoong doesn’t catch onto anything else, or at least, he doesn’t question you. Instead he has his hand on your thigh and showers you with kisses, oblivious to the fact that Mingi might have just knocked over and spilled his jar of secrets. The apartment is quiet since San is out grabbing food with a few others, giving Hongjoong leverage to kiss you in the living room— his urge, his need, evident through his touch, the deepening of the kiss, Hongjoong pushing himself up against you. But you break the kiss with a simple [but sad] smile, encouraging him to go wash up so you can follow. He laughs and whines a bit before he’s finally grabbing clothes and heading for the bathroom. You’re able to release the breath you’ve been holding, even though your chest hurts and you’re trying your best to not let this completely consume you.

The universe has different plans. Maybe, just maybe, it had been time for things to unravel.

A ding comes from Hongjoong’s phone, and you can’t help but glance at the screen. It’s Tara, but you’re having to unlock his phone to view the preview this time. You nervously navigate to his text thread with her, finding that the entire thread is choppy— big gaps in between dates, some closer than others. But, your eyes land on the first text in the thread and you instantly feel sick to your stomach.

It’s a text from about a year ago, during that summer when you spent with Hongjoong, with his family. The summer you couldn’t spend a second away from him because all you wanted was Hongjoong, all you wanted was to kiss him, cuddle him, keep him close.

The summer he bought you your favorite breakfast bagel and smoothie before dropping you off to go ‘home.’

hongjoong: do you wanna come over and stay the night at the apartment?

tara: yeah! should i leave soon?

hongjoong: yeah im just gonna be here

tara: i’ll be on my way!

tara: joongie i’m outside

hongjoong: meet you at the door in a sec

You feel your hands shaking the more you go through the thread, eyes welling up with tears as the realization hits and settles. 

Hongjoong made you trust him, made you believe in everything he said. You put your faith in all his actions, thinking he was truly doing his best to make up for everything he’s done and said.

All of that going to waste.

hongjoong: you home? can i stop by and say hi?

tara: yup!

There is a huge gap after he claimed he so-called cut her off, but it doesn’t mean that the thread ends. There are other texts between them asking if the other is going to be at so and so’s house, or if the other is going to be at so and so’s party. There’s texts of Hongjoong asking if he can pop by and say hi at her place before there’s another big gap and Tara’s texting to ask if she can see him [spoiler: he says yes].

tara: are you going to channie’s?

hongjoong: yeah, are you?

tara: i’m not sure, i wasn’t really feeling it

hongjoong: go 😞

tara: lol why the sad face, isn’t your girlfriend coming?

hongjoong: nah shes not..

tara: ohhh okay, maybe then!

hongjoong: just go, wanna see you ☹️

You don’t even read the recent text because you simply can’t. You remember every single time he mentioned those kick-its, those parties, but not once did you ever think he’d mainly go to see Tara and vice versa. You toss the phone aside and begin to pack your things, fitting them in the bag you came with— not even worrying about how you can haul the rest out right now.

“Girl, I just got home from dropping Ara off. Please don’t tell me I have to slip back into my shit and—”

“Can you meet me at my place? Please.”

“Oh. Shit, yeah, of course. I’m already on my way.” He says, picking up on the shakiness in your voice. Hongjoong is still in the shower and you’re grateful you chose to drive to his place so that you can easily slip out and leave. You’re very much sober and at your breaking point; all you can think about is getting away as soon as possible.

Because the moment you step through your door, you collapse to the floor and start crying. Crying about all the fights, crying about all the times you let up and let Hongjoong get his way. Crying about all the times you let every little feeling, every little detail, brush over your head. Crying about how much you trusted him, loved him.

“Shit, Y/N. What the fuck?” Wooyoung immediately drops to the floor, arms thrown over you as he shushes you and tries to calm you down. He has never heard you cry this hard, has never heard you long for air this badly in between cries. It kills him and he’s not even sure how he can help you right now. And that for him is a first.

When you’re able to breathe a bit, you let everything out on the table. You tell Wooyoung what Mingi said, you tell him about the texts, you tell him about all these instances that you brushed over and didn’t think much of— when in fact, you should’ve stuck to your gut feeling and questioned everything. When you should’ve pressed harder, when you shouldn’t have trusted him so easily. And the realization hits you again because fuck, it is so painful to know that the person you loved for two years hadn’t really been there for you. That he was physically there, but his heart, his soul, wasn’t entirely yours. Probably wasn’t even yours to begin with. And you are so, so stupid for thinking Hongjoong was over her.

Maybe you were just the excuse.

The rebound.

The one he needed for his own selfish reasons.

It was never about you.

And Wooyoung continues to hold you and rock you, because there’s nothing like finding out that the person you invested in didn’t do the same back. There’s nothing like finding out the time you spent on someone, the amount of vulnerability, trust, emotion that came with loving someone for two years, had meant nothing. Wooyoung could murder Hongjoong right now, but that’s the least of his worries because Hongjoong isn’t crying his fucking heart out on a studio floor.

You are.

“I don’t know what I did wrong.” You mumble into his chest. “I don’t know why I wasn’t enough, Woo. How could he just do that to me? I meant nothing to him—”

“Y/N, don’t ever let me hear you blame yourself again. You hear me? This was not your fault. You gave everything your all to him because you were an amazing girlfriend. He fucked up, and he fucked up big time. This is all him.” Your broken sobs continue to echo in your studio, your phone now constantly going off from Hongjoong’s texts and calls. When he unlocked his phone to text you, he noticed Tara’s thread open. So he panics, and he panics.

Calling, texting. Almost ready to jump in his car and explain this even though he can’t.

But Wooyoung shuts off your phone and locks the door, telling Yunho, San and Mingi to tell Hongjoong to back the hell up. That he doesn’t want him near you, and that Hongjoong would know better than to confront the both of you right now.

It all feels like a blur, like white noise; static.

2 years of nothing.

Home to him might’ve meant so many different things; people, places, feelings. But to you, home was Hongjoong. Hongjoong has always been a home to you, everything about home. A home wasn’t a home without him.

But tonight, home looked a little different. Home looks like the empty bed you’re staring at, the dark room, the stillness of your surroundings even as Wooyoung sleeps on the couch. Tonight, home felt a little different, especially when you cry and feel your heart shatter to a million pieces looking at the cold, empty space next to you in bed, Hongjoong’s clothes from your closet tossed all over the place, ripped pictures across your desk that Wooyoung had to snatch out of your grip.

Because did you deserve this? All of this? 

It was never about you.

Home was meant to be you and Hongjoong, but all the significant cracks in the relationship that lead to this, the one unfortunate blow that completely destroys you— every bit of you, everything you know, all the love that you’ve had. 

Now, there is nothing left of you.

Nothing left of this home you built.

—a/n: ty for sitting through this very personal piece of mine; a reminder that you are beautiful and so, so deserving of the best love and happiness. ♡

—taglist: @asjkdk @bintificreads @interweab @hyukssunflower @everyonewooeverywhere @mcsalterego @persphonesorchid

[endlessthxxghts]

Liquid Gold

Frankie Morales x afab!reader || W/C: 2.7k (a oneshot)

Summary: Frankie gets turned on by your love for caramel. (Read a tiny continuation of these two here, titled Comfortable!)

Content/Warnings: Pics above are for aesthetic purposes only. No physical descriptions of reader, everything is neutral. I am in fact a nonbinary girly who describes their coochie with she/her pronouns LMFAO, and both you and Frankie do that here. Feminine pet names (querida, cariño, sweet girl). You also really love caramel - like a lot. SMUT 18+ MDNI. Inappropriate use of caramel. Food play. Kitchen sex. Hickey/marking kink. Lots of tongue action. Breast worship. Cunnilingus (He's Frankie the munch, what can I say?). Fingering/finger fucking. P in V unprotected sex. Creampie... hint of a breeding kink (I'll be tame with it.. for now..). Frankie, the aftercare KING!! (Please let me know if I've missed anything xoxo.)

A/N: I was eating caramel and apples, and I couldn't stop groaning at the sweetness LMFAOOO I really fucking love caramel. Then I got horny and started thinking about Frankie. Don't we love the ways inspiration strikes? Hope you enjoy my delulus. Much love, my babies.

MASTERLIST || NOTIFS BLOG

“Mmm,” you moan. “So fucking good,” you mutter to yourself, licking the tips of your fingers to clean the residue. 

“...Querida?” Frankie calls out from the living room. “What are you, uh…” he pauses to take a deep breath in and out, his cock stirring at the faint lewd noises coming from the kitchen. “What are you doing, baby?” 

“Mmm,” you hum again in delight before responding back to him. “Nothing, baby, just grabbing a snack, I’ll be right there,” you say. 

Okay, his curiosity is definitely getting the better of him. He rises from his place on the couch, and nothing would prepare him for what his eyes were about to witness. 

You’re leaning over the counter, a plate below you with neatly cut apple slices, and you have a bottle of caramel in one hand. Your other hand is placed underneath the spout as you squeeze a dollop onto your finger, the thick liquid running down your digit before you have a chance to stop it. You quickly bring your finger into your mouth, your eyes fluttering shut at the sweetness, another delicious vibration escaping your throat. 

Frankie literally has to perch himself against the nearest wall to stop his knees from buckling. He knows how much you love your caramel, but he forgets just how much. The thud of his broad body against the wall is what forces your eyes open. 

“Oh,” you gasp with a smile. “Hi, baby. Did you want some?” You ask him, sucking your finger once more for good measure, not wanting to make a mess at your impulse decision of practically drinking the sugary substance from its bottle. 

You watch as his eyes track your finger’s movement, his gaze coming back up to linger on your lips for an extra moment. “N-no, that’s okay, querida,” he replies, distracted. 

You tilt your head in response, trying to gauge where his thoughts are right now. Then, you look down. 

Oh.

He’s thinking with his other head. 

You break away from your side of the counter, caramel still in hand, and you make your way in front of him. Putting your body flush against his, you put your free hand on his chest, reaching for his chin with your thumb and forefinger. “You sure you don’t want any, baby?” You ask him, voice teasingly smooth. You nudge his mouth open; his tongue flattening out immediately for you. “Just give it a little try, it’s so sweet.” 

You let the caramel dribble onto his tongue, and he retreats the muscle back inside when he thinks you’re done squeezing, but you don’t stop, letting it drip onto his pouty bottom lip. Your thumb is quick to run over it, not giving his tongue a chance to clean the mess you made. 

Before he knows it, you’re pulling his mouth into yours, your tongue briefly darting around your thumb before you’re sucking his bottom lip into your mouth, nearly dropping the bottle of caramel with how addicting your senses are being consumed. 

His response is just as quick, his arms snaking around your waist and backing you into the edge of the counter, pushing himself deeper into your mouth as your tongues overlap each other. The hand on his jaw is now wrapped tightly in his brown curls, keeping his mouth messily against yours. 

You feel his hands tap against the bottom of your ass cheeks, and you take the hint. Settling the bottle down, you pull yourself up on the counter. Finally, the kiss breaks, but now he’s reaching for the hem of your top, flinging it over your head, letting it land only God knows where. 

Frankie’s crowding your space, looking down at you, his chocolate brown eyes now pure black with lust. “Can I have another taste, querida?” He rasps into your mouth. 

“Y-yeah,” you stutter, your mind too turned on to register what he’s really asking. His hand is on the bottle instantly, squeezing a thick line of caramel across your naked chest. You choke on your breath at the sensation, your eyes fixated on the golden liquid starting to drip down, nearly reaching your nipples. 

Frankie takes a step back to admire his work before he’s diving right in, the caramel bottle tossed back onto the counter as his hands find their home on your ass, pulling your hips into his as you lean back, giving him the space he needs to lick up his mess. 

You feel his teeth softly graze the tops of your breasts, Frankie sucking with just the right amount of pressure for pretty little fireworks to ignite across your chest. 

“Oh, fuck, Frankie-” you moan, eyes rolling back at the feeling. “Didn’t know- shit- didn’t know caramel is what does it for you,” you say with a weak smirk, your last few words higher in pitch than normal. 

“It doesn’t,” he retorts, his tongue flicking across your nipple. “You do,” he growls, reaching for your other candy-glazed nipple. 

Between your legs are fucking drenched, and fuck, he feels so good attached to your chest like this, but you need more—she needs more. 

You’re yanking Frankie’s curls, pulling him off of you to look into his eyes—wild and desperate, he’s looking at you—his lips and chin glistening with a shine only sugar could provide. Fuck, you want that mouth somewhere else. You tell him as such. A cheeky grin spreads across his face. “Don’t have to tell me twice,” he says leaning back in, kissing each breast for good luck before he reaches for the caramel once more, letting another thick drop fall down your sternum and belly, daring to drip in places it shouldn’t. 

He follows the caramel’s path, open-mouthed kisses surfing down your torso, his tongue not letting any of it go to waste. 

The lower he goes, the needier you become. “Please- please, baby- need you,” you heave, your head falling back between your shoulder blades at the overwhelming fire roaring between your legs. 

“Paciencia, mi amor,” he whispers, kissing where the hem of your bottoms meets your tummy. “You’ve got me, cariño.”

His fingers reach for your bottoms, pulling them down swiftly as you raise yourself up to make it an easy removal. 

Wasting no time, his mouth is kissing hotly on your mound, his tongue swirling your pubic area as your hips buck further into his face. He drags his mouth lower, a shiny trail of his sweet saliva coating every inch of you as he brings your throbbing bundle of nerves into his mouth and sucks—a near pornographic wail reverberates the kitchen walls, your back nearly giving way if it wasn’t for your other hand being planted onto the countertop. 

“Jesus- Fuck, Frankie, oh my God, ohmyGod-” you pant, your chest rising and falling at an erratic rate as his mouth never stops its assault on your clit. One of his hands makes their way towards your entrance, Frankie’s two middle fingers surfing through your wetness before he prods inside with ease, his fingers always filling you up in a way your own fingers never could. 

He curves his fingers just right, hitting your release button, forcing your floodgates open with absolutely no warning. “F-fuck, fuck! Fuck, baby, I’m cumming, oh, fuck, mmm just like that- shit-”

He pulls his mouth off of you, pulling away just enough to watch as you cream all over his fingers—your caramel dripping down his fingers as his mouth positively waters at the sight. “Jesus, hermosa,” Frankie breathes, his hot breaths fanning across your center sending an aftershock of shivers down your spine. 

His fingers come to a halt, slowly slipping out of you as his eyes remain fixated at the sight. “Tan perfecta, mi amor,” he says mindlessly. You watch with bated breath to see what he does next. 

He brings his fingers up to his mouth, eyes slowly rolling into the back of his head as he licks his fingers clean, practically purring at the way you taste. You whimper at the sight, an entire new wave of arousal leaks from your sex—crying again, for more. 

“Frankie,” you whine. 

For a second, Frankie genuinely got lost in your taste, forgetting everything around him but the way your flavor sits so addictingly across his taste buds. He could spend forever drinking from you if he could. “Lo siento, cariño, lo siento,” he says, truly apologetic. “You just taste so fucking good, I can’t help myself,” his inflection turning desperate in those last few words. He pulls you in for a kiss, a tinge of your own flavor melting onto your tongue. “How do you want me?” he says softly into your lips. 

“Inside, Morales. Please,” you whine into his mouth as you reach for the bulge of his sweatpants, your legs spreading open impossibly more, begging him to end whatever coy teasing game you started. “You already made a mess on me,” you tell him. Bringing your mouth to his ear, you whisper: “Now you need to make another one inside.”

“Oh, fuck, baby,” Frankie groans, throwing his head back to contain himself. When he brings his gaze back down to you, you can see the determination behind his eyes. “That’s what you want, huh? Want me inside you? Want me dripping from you all day, huh, my sweet girl?” He’s yanking his sweats down. He steps closer to you, lips a hair’s width away from each other. “Wanna be filled up with my caramel?” He smirks. 

That was the dumbest shit you have ever heard, and your facial expression reveals that, yet it has your pussy clenching on nothing. Of course, Frankie catches it. “Oh, yeah, she does,” he says, running his fingers along your seam before he’s guiding the head of his cock into you. 

“Oh, God-” you moan, the girth of him is always a stretch no matter how many times he’s been inside you. “So fucking big- fuck-” your fingers digging into the nape of his neck as he pushes himself to the hilt. 

His one arm is wrapped behind you, his hand planted on the counter right where your ass sits to keep you steady as he begins to move—pulling completely out with just the tip at your entrance before slamming back inside, sobs pouring from your lips at the pleasurable plain hitting all the right places. “Fuck- so fucking tight,” he grunts, his vein popping out of his neck with every exertion of his hips. “Feel so fucking good wrapped around me, hermosa, shit-” 

“Frankie, p-please. T-touch me, k-kiss me, something, please, baby, I-” you plead, both hands reaching for his face now, grasping for his lips to be on yours. 

His mouth slams into yours in a bruising embrace, his mouth immediately latching onto your tongue to lap up the sweetness still laced in your spit. He’s groaning into your mouth, hips moving faster, harder—the wet slick of your pussy getting louder with each thrust, putting you both in a lust-filled haze. 

His hand snakes to your front, the pads of his fingers finding your clit, giving you the extra push you need to reach your high. “I feel her fluttering, baby, she’s close,” he mutters against you. “Cum for me, mamita, and I’ll fucking fill you up, baby, come on.”

“Oh, fuck- yes, baby, oh God-!” you’re screaming, eyes clamped shut and head thrown back as you soak his cock, nearly pushing him out of you with the force of your release. 

“Mierda- just like that, fuck-” Frankie moans, his chest heaving as he struggles to keep himself from finishing just yet, reveling in the sight of you fall apart around him. 

His hips have slowed, giving you a moment of breath, but you’re not having it. Your hips start to move on their own accord, wrapping your legs around Frankie’s waist as you buck your hips into him, whining for him to move, for him to fuck you, for him to- 

“Fucking cum inside me, Fish.”

Fish. 

That brings him to attention immediately—his hips that were once meeting your every push and pull, now stuttering as his release covers every inch of your walls. You smile wide at the full feeling inside of you even as he begins to soften and slip out of you. 

The room is filled with both of your heavy breathing, your gaze stuck on your man as he watches his cum start to leak from your used hole. 

“Christ, baby,” he breathes, his fingers collecting the spend dripping out of you only to bring it back to your opening, slowly pushing his fingers inside. Your body, now reaching oversensitivity, jerks at the feeling, a small whimper leaves your mouth. “Sorry,” he says sheepishly. “Just putting it back where it needs to be,” he tells you with a smirk, your tummy fluttering at his statement. 

He’s helping slide you off the counter now, hands gripped tightly on your waist knowing your legs must be pure jelly. “Let’s get you cleaned up, mi amor,” he says softly. “You’re all sticky,” he says in a mock exasperation, as if he wasn’t the reason for this fucking mess. 

You slap his chest, rolling your eyes as your feet hit the ground. “If I’m still sticky, it’s because you didn’t do your job properly,” you huff. 

He meets your gaze once more, licking his bottom lip before he speaks. “Oh, yeah? Telling me I need to go in one more time?” He asks, leaning in with his tongue out to reach for your chest. 

“AGH, NO,” you screech, holding your hands up to keep him away. “Last I checked, I was just trying to eat my apples-” you pause at the realization. “Oh my god, wait!!! My apples!!!” You break from Frankie’s hold, turning to see your plate of sweet, crisp apples—now brown and spoiled. “My apples,” you say softly, your lips jutting out into a frown. 

Frankie chuckles behind you, grabbing ahold of your waist as he guides you to the bathroom. “I’ll cut you a new one, sweet girl. Let’s just clean my mess up, yeah?” 

“Okay,” you submit. 

He runs your favorite soft wash cloth under warm water, adding a drop of your favorite soap to get any stubborn sugar stains. “But, Frankie?”

“Sí, cariño?” 

“Leave the mess between my legs.” 

“Baby-” he says, slightly concerned not wanting you to get a UTI or anything. 

“I’ll go pee,” you cut him off. “Just let me sit in the feeling of you for a little bit. Please?”

“Fine,” he says softly. “But we’re showering after I feed you your apple.”

“After you feed me?” You ask, your cheeks going hot at the tenderness of the gesture. 

“Yeah, baby,” he says nonchalantly as he kisses your forehead, wiping around your sensitive center. He hangs the cloth to dry before putting it in the hamper. He grabs one of your favorite comfort shirts from your drawer, putting it on you, before he’s guiding you back to the kitchen. 

In the midst of your rabid behavior, neither of you realized that caramel bottle toppled over, long enough for nearly a quarter of the bottle to make its way through. 

“MY CARAMEL!” You cry, never wanting to let the universe’s best creation go to waste. 

Frankie stifles a laugh, not wanting to upset you but finding your love for caramel so endearing. “Baby, it’s okay, we can buy more,” he comforts, rubbing your back as you freeze at the sight. 

“I know,” you say. “I just hate to waste such- such yummy things. This is literally liquid fucking gold,” you add, gesturing to the spilt thick liquid blessing your countertop. 

“I thought what was inside of you was your liquid gold?” He says with his soft chocolate puppy eyes, gesturing to your cum-filled pussy. 

“Oh my god, Frankie, what-” you start, unsure of whether to laugh or be weirded out at what just came out of his mouth. “Please just cut my apple,” you say defeated, slapping your forehead as your body begins to shake with laughter. 

As Frankie peels the skin off your fruit—he knows how much it makes your throat itchy—he mutters something that you couldn’t quite pick up. 

“What was that?” You ask again. 

“You know I’m right,” he says as he clears his throat, eyes focused on his task. “Your liquid gold isn’t the caramel,” he adds for an unnecessary confirmation. 

“Francisco-”

“Tell me I’m wrong.”

You stay silent for a moment. 

“Shut up.” 

He grins triumphantly, squeezing a generous amount of your second favorite liquid gold equivalent all over your juicy apple.

If you enjoyed this, feel free to check out my masterlist or follow my updates blog @endlessthxxghtsnotifs to be notified when new stories come out! I love you all, thank you so much for reading and interacting with me.

Also, please check this post out to see some ways you can educate yourself on how you can help Palestine.

@pedrostories

[kolyasangel]

6:09 a.m.

synopsis: after nikolai insists, you and him both spend a very long and passionate night together...

content: fem!reader, dom!nikolai, nsfw, aftercare, a bit of fluff, mdni

One more round.

One more round is what Nikolai had promised a few hours ago. Yet here he was, thrusting deep into you relentlessly like there was no tomorrow. However, you didn't mind, for you allowed him to do so with a weak voice after he begged you for another every time. He was just that good at getting everything he wanted. Missionary was what he decided for this supposed last round, wanting to end it off with a romantic position, as he put it. You and Nikolai had been at it for hours now, trying different positions, taking time to explore each other's bodies, basking in the glow of all the overwhelming pleasure. It was exhausting, sticky, and sweaty— all of the above times two. Nikolai's endurance was no joke, though, after many hours, his signs of tiredness were finally starting to show through.

This didn't happen often, where you would stay up all night loving each other like this, a rare occurrence, actually. But Nikolai's dramatic tirade last night of claiming he would die without a goodnight kiss was what started this in the first place, and things escalated rather quickly from there, fueling his hunger to indulge in you.

"Fuck, harder!" A loud moan elicited from Nikolai as you pulled on his hair, his deep tone sending a shiver up your spine. It was one of his favorite things you did during sex, and he even encouraged you to be rougher and harsher with him. It's not like you could hurt him easily, at least not physically, anyway.

You felt bad for your neighbors who had to hear the lewd noises coming out of Nikolai's mouth at the ungodly hours of three to four a.m., most likely disrupting their sleep. You wouldn't be surprised if you got a noise complaint sooner or later today, even though you tried your best to tame him. You smacked him, clawed at his back, and harshly pulled at his hair too many times to count in an attempt to get him to be quiet, but that was an obvious mistake on your part because your actions only made it worse, eliciting louder moans and harder thrusts from him like he was a dog in heat. It shouldn't surprise you that Nikolai is a fucking freak, that he already alluded to a long time ago.

“Kolya, I'm.. I'm almost—”

Nikolai's face was buried into the crook of your neck, inhaling the sweet scent of your skin that was invading his senses, his hot tongue making its way through slightly parted lips to drag along raw bite marks and hickeys that littered your skin, all while his throbbing cock drove deeper into you. His big hands were on either side of you, gripping the sheets with glistening fingers still coated in slick.

"Yeah, baby? Just a little bit more, 'kay? I'm close too.." he cooed.

The backs of your hands were on your face covering your eyes, unwilling to meet his gaze while you looked like a vulnerable mess, shuddering from the blissful yet almost unbearable pleasure he graced you with. Nikolai noticed this and pulled your hands away from your face, making you look right at him as he intertwined his fingers with yours. Your glassy eyes and red face were so so cute to him. He loved how you looked in this moment, even if you felt embarrassed and didn't want him to look at you. He was the one doing this to you, making you feel so much pleasure that you were unable to string a sentence together. His face didn't match his brutal pace at all, every roll of his hips sending you into complete ecstasy.

One more thrust and you felt like you would unravel.

“A-Ah— Mmh!” He covers your mouth to muffle your noises.

"You're being so loud you know, wouldn't want to get you in trouble, now. Would we?" He removed his hand, returning to hold yours while eyeing the small pout on your lips that formed from his words.

"You're the loud o—Mfh!"

Nikolai latched his lips onto yours as he pounded into you, those last few pumps sending both of you over the edge and making you finally release for the nth time.

"F-Fuck yeah.." Nikolai moaned into your mouth as he rode out his high, his voice making you even more dizzy than you already were.

Once he opened his eyes again after ravishing in his high, his fingers swept some hair that was sticking to your forehead aside. Despite being absolutely drunk in pleasure, he was still being so sweet to you, checking up on you every hour or so to make sure you were holding up from the tiring activity. It was obvious he had taken a toll on you, taking the hints of your fucked out state and panting as signs of clear exhaustion. He chuckled a bit and slowly pulled out of you, groaning in the process as you were still clenching around him.

You fell back on the mattress dramatically as soon as he was out, closing your eyes.

"I think I wore you out completely." he laughed.

"What time is it?" You ask as you rub your eyes, your vision still blurry from tears.

Nikolai reached for his phone on the nightstand, checking the time. He held out his phone to you, pointing at the screen while wiggling his eyebrows. "My my, we spent so long together."

"Just read it, I can't see clearly right now."

"It's 6:09, very fitting time don't you think?" He smirked, giggling at his own joke.

You lightly hit his chest and turn your head to the window, noticing how the sun started to rise. Light seeped through the curtains, the sun finding its grasp on your skin, the subtle rays making themselves visible on the creases in the sheets.

He rubbed the spot where you hit him and laughed. "Feeling feisty, are we? I like this side of you."

"I can tell by the way you wouldn't shut the hell up."

"Aww, are you cranky? Want me to fix it?" His hand trailed up your thigh again before you slapped it away.

"Kolya, I'm tired.." You whined, feeling too disoriented and tired for his antics.

He only smiled before grabbing your face to plant a huge smooch on your lips, followed by multiple forehead kisses.

"I know honey, I'll take care of you. I'll go get you some water, okay?" He got off the bed and left the room, and you shamelessly stared at his bare state while he did so. He returned a few minutes later with a cool glass of water for you. Bringing the glass to your lips, he helped you sit up and drink, making sure you down the water carefully.

"Need anything else?" He asked, sweeping some hair that kept falling over your face behind your ear and planting a sweet kiss on your cheek. You shook your head, placing the glass on the nightstand before your eyes trailed, watching him put his boxers on.

Nikolai leaned back to stretch before reclining onto the mattress, his toned arms relaxing above his head, revealing the marks you left and the sheen of moisture glistening like diamonds on his body. Scratches covered his whole back and arms, and a wave of heat washed over you, realizing that you were the one who did that to him. He looked so pretty lying in bed like that, his eyelids fluttering closed. Not to mention, he had the cutest bedhead and a raspy voice from being so vocal.

"I'm exhausted.. let's stay in bed and sleep for the rest of the day." He said as you moved lower to press your lips on his arms to soothe any discomfort you may have caused him to endure, causing a smirk to fall upon his lips. You took all the more severe repercussions, but you're still taking the time to kiss him better. He moved his arm around to rest on your thigh instead, kneading the flesh to ease the soreness in your muscles.

After a few minutes of massaging you, Nikolai shuffled closer to wrap his strong arms around your waist, resting his head on your chest. The gentle heave of his chest relaxed you after what had just ensued— it never failed to, always bringing you back to your senses. You ruffle his fluffy hair, running your fingers through his soft locks and caressing the nape of his neck, resting your hand there for a bit to feel the warmth of his skin and his sweat.

"Do you want to shower?" You ask him in a softer voice.

"In a bit, I just want to stay like this right now." He hummed contently, looking up at you with a playful grin painted on his face.

"What?"

"Nothing. You're pretty." He says before laying his head back down, his fingers tracing patterns on your heated skin.

"Go to sleep, you're tired too."

"Can't, dove. I feel so awake now after seeing you so I wanna stare at you instead."

[knoxic]

Eris Vanserra drabble

summary: smut, eris is obsessed, enemies to lovers

wc: 664, sorry

a/n: I have been writing small bits of the next part of How to be a High Lady but it's so been so hard, so I had to write a small easy thingy for Eris so I wouldn't stress myself out.

Eris' bloodshot eyes gazed at your nude form, admiring the sway of your hips and the soft bounce of your tits. Even with your head thrown back you could feel his eyes on you, making up for his tied hands. He couldn't touch you so he'd pay attention to the smallest detail, not wanting to miss anything if this turned out to be a one in a million opportunity.

"Please–" his voice was barely audible, probably from having restrained himself from moaning your name, "please." A mere whisper. You slowly shifted to look at him, your head rolling into your shoulder. The sight that greeted you was one you'd never forget. Eris' lips were red and swollen from the rough kissing session you had earlier, the corner of his bottom lip starting to bruise from a bite. His hair was a mess, a strange thing to see on him, his combed red locks now stood in every direction possible, shiny with sweat. His flushed chest adorned with multiple nail scratches, hickeys and bites. Eris looked absolutely ravishing.

"Please what, Eris?" Your voice was taken over by lust, coming out lower and rougher than you expected. Apparently that was enough to make him lose the last bit of control he still had.

You watched helplessly as Eris burned through his tie, freeing the hands that were on you barely a second later, the remaining fabric flew across the bed as he turned both of you to be on top.

"You know what I want." He watched you with heavy lidded eyes. "Tell me."

"No." You refused, even though every cell on your body screamed at you to just say it.

"Why?! Say you want me, and I'll be yours." The exasperation in his voice made your stomach drop. "It's easy. I want you, I burn for you," he rolled his hips, pushing a whimper out of your mouth, his cock twitched inside you at the sound, "I would let Prythian burn for you– no, I would burn it for you." The gentle rolls of his hips quickly became rough thrusts. His lustful eyes never left yours.

"Rhysand would kill me." You tried looking away from him, not bearing the weight of his feelings pouring down on you. Not when you so clearly felt something too. A warm hand found your jaw, holding you in place.

"If I promise to kill myself, would you give me– give us a chance in the afterlife?" Your heart beat faster at the way Eris showed no hesitation, no doubt in saying that.

"You're insane–"

"Yes! Yes I am, you turned me into a mad male." His thrusts faltered, showing he was close. "We can be so much better together. You and I, little fox, just you and I, imagine it." He rested his forehead against yours, eyes closing to focus on not losing himself before you, one of his hands slipped between your slippery bodies to rub gentle circles on your clit. "Say it, and nothing else will matter. I swear to be completely devoted to you, and only you, ask me anything and I'll do it, if you ask me the sun on a platter, I'll burn myself to death just to get a segment of it for you." Your brain formed the image of a small chunk of the sun on a platter, the vibrant gold taking over your vision, threads of it slipping to the ground and shining through the ceiling, one of them bigger, tying you and Eris together.

His heavy breathing fanned your face, the pull of the thread on his heart almost pushed him over the edge. The thread tied to your heart brought you closer to your complexion. Finding Eris' eyes did it for you, there seemed to be threards of gold in those russet irises too. He pulled at his end of the thread and you fell, harder than you ever had before, bringing your mate with you.

"I want you."

[daycourtofficial]

Hickeys and The Marks We Leave

Summary: You and Cassian have been sneaking around for a year now, keeping your relationship hidden. You’re tired of hiding, but Cassian doesn’t want to tell everyone yet, so when his brothers accidentally see some hickeys you left on him, you want to tell everyone, but he doesn’t.

Author’s note: this is heavily inspired by Hickeys by @lalacliffthorne so I highly suggest reading that as well!!

Cassian didn’t think anything of the delightful morning sex the two of you had before he had to go to training. Despite keeping your relationship a secret, it was really easy to find ways into each other’s rooms throughout the day and night. A rigorous training schedule was one of the reasons you two slept in Cassian’s bed every night - you could slip out easily while him and Azriel were at training.

Cassian had, to his misfortune, cleaned the scent of you off of him, as he did every morning the two of you had sex before his training. He wasn’t ready to tell his brothers he was seeing someone, especially not that it was you. His brothers adored you, Mor and Feyre adored you, even Amren was somewhat fond of you.

The problem is once he tells them, it becomes very real. And once it becomes very real, he could mess it all up. Cassian was in love with you, no doubt about it, and you were in love with him. But Cassian was always afraid, waiting for the other shoe to drop, waiting for something to go wrong.

His thoughts whirled and swirled, consumed by you, which is how Gwyn’s voice catches him by surprise as she shrieks, “Cassian is that a hickey?”

Cassian stops stretching, looking down at his bare torso, finding a trail of hickeys down his chest that extend into his pants. He looks back up to see all of the valkyries and Azriel looking at him.

He thinks quickly, “I fell coming up here.”

They’ll buy that, right?

“This one has teeth marks,” Azriel says, pointing to one close to his belly button. He swats his brothers hand away, “besides you have no marks anywhere else, unless you want to drop your pants to prove they don’t go further down.”

Cassian was going to murder his brother in front of these priestesses, he just knew it.

Fuck, he thinks, Azriel never lets any information go. If he suspects anything serious, he’ll follow Cassian around for months, years even to figure it out.

Damn you and your beautiful mouth.

“Fine, I saw someone last night, happy?”

Azriel keeps his stare on Cassian’s face, “then they would have healed by now, or at least be more healed. These are fresh bruises, probably an hour or two old.”

“Okay, fine, I stayed with someone last night and we had sex again this morning. Now, let’s get back to work.”

Azriel let it go, but Cassian could see in his eyes all the lingering questions he has.

-

Cassian returns to his room in desperate need of a shower, only to find you still in bed asleep. He sits on the bed next to you, and kisses you nice and slow, waking you.

“Mm, morning Cass,” you drawl sleepily.

“Ah, good morning my little vixen. While you were sleeping here all nice and peacefully, I was getting grilled by my nosy brother for the beautiful trail of hickeys you left down my chest.”

You freeze, not realizing you were going to leave a mark on him. “I’m sorry Cass, really I am. But maybe this is an opportunity to tell them about us?”

He huffs, “we’ve talked about this, no. I’m not ready to tell them.” He gets up off the bed, heading towards the bathroom.

“Oh so it’s just ‘no’ and that’s it? I don’t get a say?” You reply, sitting up straighter in the bed.

“Not when it comes to my brothers you don’t.” He starts angrily looking around the room for fresh clothes.

“Your brothers? They’re also my friends? Anyway so what? We’ll never tell them?”

“We’ll tell them. Eventually.”

“Eventually? Cassian it’s been a year. What are you waiting for?”

“To feel ready,” he replies, wanting this argument to be over.

“What if you never feel ready to tell them?”

“Then they won’t know.”

“Cassian I’m starting to think the reason you won’t tell them is because you’re ashamed of me.”

Cassian doesn’t respond, standing stock still in the doorway to the bathroom, seemling confirming your deepest fear. This secret relationship was fun, yes, but you were always afraid he was either ashamed of you or that he didn’t see a future worth telling his brothers about.

“Well then, I guess there’s nothing for Azriel to find out then. If you’re so ashamed of me, you’ll be glad to be rid of me.” You reply curtly, storming out of his room, not letting him get another word in.

-

You’d been avoiding Cassian for three days since your fight. He hated what he said and what he didn’t say as soon as you had left, but he wanted to give you space to cool off so you could talk like reasonable adults. Except you’ve decided to not be a reasonable adult by avoiding him at all costs.

If it didn’t piss him off so much he’d be incredibly impressed. His family has still seen you, you haven’t completely dropped off the face of the planet. But you haven’t been in the same room as Cassian since your fight. He’s hardly caught your scent, but he knows you’re around.

“What’s wrong Cassian?” Rhys asks, Cassian’s distress the past few days impossible for him to hide or cover up.

Cassian sighs, rubbing his hand over his face. “I think (y/n)’s avoiding me, I haven’t seen her in days.”

Rhys has a ghost of a smirk cross his face before it turns into concern. “And why do you think she’s avoiding you?”

“We got into a fight and I said some things I shouldn’t have and I haven’t seen her since.”

“And when was the fight?” Rhys asks.

“Three days ago,” Cassian responds.

“So the same day we teased you over your hickeys at training.”

Despite having known Azriel for hundreds of years, he has always been able to sneak up on Cassian.

Cassian turns to the shadowsinger, grinding his teeth, “it might have been the same day.”

“Curious,” Azriel says, not even looking at Cassian. Cassian knows Azriel’s figured it out, he has the look on his face he gets during interrogations when he’s waiting for his prey to tell him what he’s already figured out.

The three of them stand in silence while Cassian weighs his options.

“Okay fine, we’ve been together for a year now and she was tired of hiding it and wanted us to be public about our relationship but I kept telling her I wasn’t ready. The hickeys were an accident, but I blew up on her over it and she might have insinuated I was hiding our relationship because I was ashamed of her. I didn’t deny it and she ran out before I could say anything.”

Cassian puts his head in his hands, trying to bury the shame he feels for how he handled things.

“A whole year?” Rhys asks.

“Yeah, things started happening around solstice last year.”

“I didn’t realize you guys had been sneaking around that long,” Azriel states.

Cassian snaps his head up at his brother, “you knew?”

“Of course we knew,” Rhys responds, “she hasn’t slept in her room in months. The maids complained to me that she doesn’t have to make her bed every morning. And I know she hates no task more than making a bed.

So I figured she was seeing someone and sneaking back in. I had Azriel figure it out. His shadows caught you two taking a bath together.”

“Well,” Cassian sighs, “there are much worse things they could have caught us doing.”

Cassian’s laugh dies as Azriel turns to him and asks, “Are you ashamed of her?”

The look on Azriel’s face reminds Cassian that while Azriel was his brother, he was also incredibly fond of you. Both his brothers were, they both loved you dearly, but Azriel especially.

“No, I’m not. I’m an idiot because as soon as she said it I couldn’t believe it! Me? Ashamed of her? She’s the best thing in my life, how could I be ashamed of her?”

Azriel backs down a little, his temper satiated by Cassian’s admission. “Then why keep it hidden?”

“Because if I told you two, it would become real. And I could fuck it up if it’s real. If it’s hidden, it’s our secret. It’s fun. But telling all of you makes it real. And when it’s real, the stakes are higher.

“I’ve had my heart broken before, I’ve survived it. But I couldn’t survive if we became real and it ended.”

Cassian’s silence hung in the air until he felt Rhys’s arms pull him into a hug.

“But what if it doesn’t end, brother?” Rhys loosens his hold on Cassian as Azriel chimes in.

“Whether or not you tell us, it was clearly real. And you really hurt her. Fix it,” he says, before walking out of the room.

Cassian and Rhys watch him walk out, confusion coating Cassian’s face.

“Ah, he’ll come around. He’s just upset he didn’t figure it out without my prodding. And the fact he views her like a little sister.

“No doubt he’ll kick your ass in training tomorrow, especially if you don’t fix things.”

-

That night, after you skipped family dinner, Cassian decided to go straight to your room. You answered the door, wearing one of his shirts, clearly upset.

“Hi,” you squeak, knowing he’d come around eventually to come talk to you, maybe even take his shirts you had stolen back.

“Can I come in?” He asks, a look of sadness on his face. You open the door, allowing him entry and he closes it softly behind him.

“I’m sorry,” he tells you, having to get the words he had rehearsed out as quickly as possible, afraid you’d shut him out again. “I’m not ashamed of you. I was terrified if I told anyone it meant this would become real and I could mess it up, but I messed it up anyway.”

You open your mouth to respond, but Cassian cuts you off. “I love you, and Rhys and Azriel know, which means Feyre probably knows, which means everyone likely knows. I don’t care who knows anymore if it means I can have you. If you’ll have me back.”

The past few days of ignoring Cassian were torture. You were in love with him, but he was also your best friend. Being mad at him felt awful, but feeling like he was ashamed of you was worse.

His confession makes you soften, reaching your hand out to his. “So you’re not ashamed of me?”

He clasps your hand in his, rubbing his thumb across the back of it. “Absolutely not. I didn’t respond because it took me off guard,” he looks into your eyes, reaching up to cup your face, “I could never be ashamed of you. I’m sorry you thought I was. I just couldn’t believe you would think that.

“I’ll shout from every rooftop in Velaris that I’m in love with you if you’ll have me.”

His gaze was piercing, an intensity you’ve hardly seen from him. You smile at him, reaching to touch his cheek, “can I pick the first rooftop?”

Cassian snorts, “what do you say? Will you let me grovel for you to take me back?”

You smile, pressing against him, “I’ll allow it.”

[sillymilie]

Charles Leclerc smut

In which your boyfriend broke up with you and you go over to Charles' place

You were devastated. 3 long years of relationship and your boyfriend decided to put an end to it. You couldn't stop crying. He had left your house 10 minutes ago, leaving you alone in this awful situation. Tears filled your eyes as you could barely see what was in front of you. You were tired from all the crying, but you couldn't go to bed yet. You were sat down on your couch an the whole situation was far too painful. You needed to see someone. And you desperately knew who that "someone" would be.

You stretched your arm, reaching the coffee table that was in front of you and you grabbed your phone. Wiping the tears away, you dialed your bestfriend Charles' number. You didn't know if he'd be awake by now since it was almost 1am, but you decided to give it a try anyway. On the 3rd ring, he picked up.

"Hey (Y/N), what's up?" Your bestfriend asked. It took you a couple of seconds before answering.

"Can I come over to your place?" You asked as tears started to roll down your cheeks again.

"Always. Is there something wrong?" He said.

"Yeah.

You hung up, quickly put your shoes on and grabbed a jacket. As the front door closed, the pain in your chest started hitting you again. It hurt, so bad, but you still got into your car and made it to Charles'.

-

Three fast and hard knocks made Charles open the door in two seconds. As soon as your eyes met his, you could feel he knew what was going on. He closed the front door and wrapped his arms around you.

"It's him, right?" Your bestfriend asked, looking into your eyes.

"It's over." You said.

Charles joined you in his bed as he got close to you. He wrapped his arms around you and pulled you into his chest. Your face was buried into him.

-

You had fallen asleep and you woke up at the sound of shuffling besides you. You looked over to your left and there was Charles. He somehow managed to get closer to you. You smiled and looked up at him, his face relaxed and shiny. He was still sleeping and you loved watching him as he did so. Charles looked angelic.

After staring at him for a while, he eventually woke up from his sleep. His eyes met yours quickly, looking into yours before he closed them and rubbed them. He yawned and let out a small groan before finally talking to you.

"Hi." Charles said, giving you a small smile.

"Hey."

"Are you feeling better?" He asked.

"Yeah, I really appreciate you."

"I'm always here. Whenever you need." He said, replacing a strand of your hair that got messed up while you were sleeping.

-

The two of you stayed in bed for a little talking about other things to change your mind from what had happened last night. The more you talked to Charles, the more you realized how badly it should've been him all along. Those 3 years and more should've been spent with him and not your stupid ex.

You stared into his eyes, feeling safe, but also butterflies. You've always felt different around Charles, but this time it was a whole other type of different.

Your bestfriend didn't say anything. He stared at you in return, his arms still wrapped around you, warmth surrounding your bodies. Charles moved one of his hands up to your face. His hand caressed your cheek, cupping it with his hand as his thumb rolled circles on it.

"Why do I feel this way?" You whispered, tons of emotions filling your body up.

"Because we love each other." Charles simply answered still caressing your cheek

Your heart started beating faster. Your eyes could only focus on his lips and your hand tugged at his shirt impatiently. Charles smiled, and pulled your face closer to his. His lips brushed against yours, making you envy him. He gave you a small kiss on the lips before having a whole make out session with you. You rolled over on your back and Charles got on top of you. His kisses trailed down to your neck, leaving hickeys all over it. His hands went all over your body causing you to shiver. Charles went back to kissing you. His heavy breathing made you go crazy, wanting nothing but more of him.

"Charles..."

"What? Did I do something wrong?" He asked suddenly stopping, a worried look on his face.

"No, don't stop. Please. I need you."

"Are you sure?" Charles asked, his eyebrows furrowed in concern.

You answered by tugging at his hair and pulling him closer to you for a kiss. Charles pulled away from the kiss and took his shirt off, throwing it to the ground before getting back to making out with you. His hands trailed on the hem of your shirt, helping you take it off. The two of you took off your pants. You could see how the buldge in Charles' pants was growing, and you loved it.

"You are everything..." Charles said kissing your cheek, then your neck.

Your hands played with his hair. You couldn't wait for him to be inside of you. It's all you wanted. Charles took off his boxers... God was he big. You looked at him, not saying anything. You didn't know if you could take all of it.

"(Y/N), are you feeling okay?"

"I don't know if I'd be able to... take it all." You answered, kind of embarrassed. Your cheeks flushed pink as you kept looking at him.

"I'll go slowly and you tell me if you want me to stop, okay? I would never in my life hurt you, ever."

You nodded in response, biting your lip. Charles took your underwear off and guided his member on the edge of your core. He could feel how wet you were, and you could feel his pre-cum already. The mix of the two of you felt heavenly. Charles slowly put his dick inside of you, making sure you couldn't get hurt. A loud moan escaped from your lips. A wave of warmth flushed through your body as Charles kept whispering in your ear how perfect you are. After a few seconds, you got more used to it. Charles started thrusting in and out of you, each time going a little faster. He felt amazing. He was sweet, passionate and smooth with you. He was so patient. His thrusts got only better. His moans and yours filled the room. Charles' hand got to your clit, gently rubbing it with his fingers. A sharp moan was heard from you, burying your head in the crook of his neck, your arms wrapped around it.

"(Y/N)... I'm close..." Charles moaned as he went faster.

"Me too... keep going. You feel so good."

In a matter of seconds Charles came inside of you, filling you with his warmth and love. You joined in at the same time, letting go of Charles' neck. All of a sudden you got extremely tired. Charles let himself fall besides you on his bed, exhausted. The two of you stayed in silence, thinking about what had just happened.

Charles rolled onto his side, looking at you. You turned your head to face him. He was admiring you, his eyes full of love and care for you. How long had he felt this way for? So many questions ran through your mind but you ignored them. You ignored them because you now realized that the man lying besides you was your only purpose of life. You were ready to drop everything you had for him. At the end, you didn't know why you loved him, but to you, that meant true love. Not knowing why you love someone is the purest kind of love there was, is and ever will be to mankind. His slow blinks proved he was ready to do anything for you.

"I think this is as close to heaven as I'll ever get." He said.

[ja3hwa]

Day 19 : Double Penetration : YunGi

「Title」 : Three Is Better

「Word count」 :  2.0k

-> Genre: Smut, College Au

Paring: (Mingi & Yunho) Boyfriend's YunGi x Reader

[Warnings] : Making out. Hickeys. Big dick Yunho and Mingi. Light-hearted sex. Poly relationship. Swearing. Pet names. Praise from Yunho. Mingi is a moaning mess. Multiple orgasms. Protected anal sex. Unprotected sex (Mingi didn't wrap it. Woops) Let me know If I missed anything

February Filth Fest Event Day Calendar

"Please, please. Please." You sounded like a broken record. One that had been broken by none other than the infamous bad boy Mingi and his best friend, Yunho. You were the good girl in school. You weren't popular by all means, but you weren't an outcast either. You had friends, and you did what every normal college student would do. You lived a normal life.... well, that was until Mingi, the deep-voiced boy from your musical art class, started to take interest in you.

Everyone wanted him and his friends. They were the idols of the school. But none of them were interested in relationships or flings or even hookups. Girls would lie, saying they'd been with them, but in truth, the boys were untouchable, and that made them even more desirable. Heck, they didn't even like human interaction with anyone other than their friend group. But yet when Mingi saw you, he knew he wanted you. And so did Yunho.

It became a game of cat and mouse. But in this case, it was two very large cats cornering one scared little mouse. You wanted it, though. As much as you fought it at first. You wanted the pleasure you knew they would provide. But part of you wanted to keep your dignity, not wanted to be plastered as a whore in the school. But Mingi and Yunho's reassured you that no one would come to know your dirty secret. And yet, no one would even believe it anyway if it were to get out.

So here you stand, with two large bodies holding you close in between them. Mingi's fingers were paced fast as you high came ripping closer and closer. Yunho's tongue lapped the bright purple marks on your soft skin, the ones he created so he could show others you were taken without anyone knowing who exactly gave them to you. They were both possessive over you. Learning more and more things about you and your body every time they had you in these situations.

"Mingi I..I.." You gripped his biceps, nails digging into his flesh as you could feel your orgasm approaching. Mingi just chuckled, going faster while Yunho snaked his hand from behind you to place a finger on your clit, circling it quickly in time with Mingi's thrusts.

"Fuck fuck fuck.." you swore, knees buckling, you fall into Yunho's arms, making him keep you up while they continue. Your orgasm comes quickly, Mingi letting out a chuckle at his work. You were so fucked out already and they hadn't even started yet. Yunho swopped you up, laying you on his bed while Mingi takes this time to undress, finally making you not the only one naked in the room. Yunho kisses your forehead whispering how good you were, making your heart jump at his words.

“Yunnie.” You shakily place a hand on his cheek, bringing him close so you could kiss him on the lips passionately. Yun’s hands snaked down your body, gripping your breast, giving them a squeeze. You moan into his mouth making him smile. The noises you made were always music to his ears.

“So Me or Yun first, baby? Since we chose last time.” Mingi rubbed your ankles as he stood by the end of the bed. You sat up, looking at your lover. A hard gulp ran down your throat as your tried to prepare yourself to answer him. You recently found you wanted to try a new thing but became unsure how to ask. No better time than the present, right?

“I…I want both of you..” You glance over to Yunho, “At the same time.” Mingi and Yunho could feel their dicks twitch at the idea. don’t get them wrong, they both fantasised about taking you at the same time but they didn’t want to scare you away with the act. But hearing the thought roll off your tongue, god it made them go feral. Yunho jumped up, ripping his shirt off while he jogged over to his dresser.

“Rock, paper, scissors,” Mingi shouted with a huge smile. You tilted your head in confusion as you watch Yunho strip down while he hold his fist out.

“Deal.” Yunho smirks, throwing the lube on the bed next to you before also placing his fist out. They swung, Mingi getting scissors, and Yunho getting rock.

“Fuck!” Mingi swears with a whimpering tone. Yunho laughs smugly walking over to you with pride. He lets his hand out for you to take, so he could pull you up off the bed so you can stand on your wobbly legs. Did they really just play rock, paper, scissors for who fucks you in which hol-

“Oh god….” your cheeks run a blush in a similar shade to Mingis pink hair. Yunho twirls you so you face Mingi and he could stand behind you. He kisses your neck from behind, rubbing your ass slightly before letting his hand land a smack on your soft skin.

“Next time Min. But right now, this ass is mine.” Yunho chuckles to himself.

He lathers himself up with lube and then coats his fingers again. With one finger he begins prodding at your ass before slipping it in slowly. It’s a foreign feeling and it has you squirming under his touch. He murmurs something in your ear you can’t quite make out but it’s all a blur anyways when he begins sucking at your neck. He adds another finger and he has to hold you in place. It’s almost painful but the lube is a blessing.

Mingi is suddenly in your sight, grabbing your chin to look at him. “Keep your eyes on me, I wanna see your face.”

Mingi cups your core, chuckling slightly at how wet you still were... He’s able to slip two fingers in easily and the noise that comes from your lips is something that you wouldn’t imagine. They go at two different paces and you can’t think. You forget that you’re meant to be looking at Mingi and you focus on him. Yunho has to hold you up as your knees keep wanting to give way. You have never felt this much before in your life.

“I...I feel weird..” The tingle in your gut was growing differently than any other orgasms you’ve ever experienced before. You lent more into Yunhos body, while Mingi got down on his knees so he could be face to face with your dripping pussy. His tongue licks a long strip, making you gasp out, gripping his short hair. His fingers got faster while Yunho stayed at the same pace, making your brain shortcircuit. Before you could tell what was going on, you were cumming all over mingi’s face.

“Fuck our baby just squirted,” Mingi said in amusement while Yunho chuckled against your ear, making you blush even more than you were prior. They both pulled out making you whine. You left dizzy, unable to register what was happening. All you could do was watch Mingi disappear for a second before reappearing with a towel, wiping his face clean with a smug smile plastered to it. You could hear the sound of a wrapper being opened behind you. You glanced over your shoulder, seeing Yunho rolling a condom on his thick length. He had a sweet smile but you knew this man had a dark side. He was going to enjoy ruining you.

“Okay, Min, lay back and let our baby ride you.” Mingi does what Yunho asks, laying down on the bed so you can straddle his hips. You guide his cock to your entrance and sink down on him, watching his face contort as you squeeze his length. He fills you perfectly, hitting spots inside you that make you see stars. Fuck, you swear every time you feel his cock it gets bigger. From behind, you suddenly feel Yunho’s fingers, slick from the lube, slide against your ass like he had done before. You shiver at the feeling but welcome it, angling your hips so he has better access.

“You feel so perfect squeezing me,” Mingi moans from below you, hands reaching out to grope your breasts in order to distract you from the discomfort you might feel soon enough.

“Isn’t she tight, Min. Always so good for us ?” Yunho grins, pressing a finger into your ass. You hold your breath at the feeling, but Minigi just whispers calming words to you. You relax into them as Yun slowly moves his finger. One finger becomes two, and you ride Mingi a bit harder as you warm up to the feeling. He grips your hips and guides you on his large cock, working the pleasure from you.

“Please, Yuyu, please,” you beg, leaning back up against his chest. He kisses your neck and smiles at your neediness.

“You ready for me, Darling?” he teases, thrusting his fingers at a quicker pace.

“Fuck yes, Yunho, I need you so bad.” Yun pulls you into a bruising kiss as he removes his fingers and replaces them with the tip of his cock.

“You’re doing so good for us, baby. Now be a good girl and take a deep breath.” Yunho keeps kissing you as he presses his cock further and further inside of you. Mingi helps you relax, but you can tell it’s difficult for him too. His strokes are getting messy as you get tighter around him. His release to coming quicker than he expected. Only a thin wall now separates Yunho and Mingi’s cocks, and that just turns them on even more. It turns you on even more.

They pump into you simultaneously, finding the perfect rhythm that makes your heart stutter. You’re at mercy to them, putty in their hands while their thrusts become different pacing, making it near hard to breathe.  All you can do is moan and beg, your brain becoming jelly the harder they fuck you. With their stamina, they seem to last so much longer than other men. It was like they were some type of super soldiers They bring you to orgasm after orgasm, pleasing you seems to be their only goal.

“I’m gonna come,” Mingi whimpers from below you, fingers digging into your hips with bruising force. “Please, I’m gonna come.” Yunho leans over to bite your shoulder, pumping into your ass with deeper strokes than ever.

“You gonna cum Doll? You want Min to cum inside you?” Yunho’s fingers wrap around your neck, giving it a tight squeeze.

“Oh my god, Mingi, please give it to me. Please come inside me,” you moan through your strong high, gripping onto Yun’s arm. Mingi comes on a long, drawn-out moan, sending Yunho over the edge right after. He thrusts into you a few more times before he becomes too sensitive, then they’re both pulling out.

The three of you fall into a heap on the bed, panting and sweating for a moment. Yunho kisses you deeply before shifting to give Mingi the same treatment. Yunho gets up to grab a washcloth while Mingi holds you tightly, pampering your face with sweet kisses. They take care of you sweetly. Ensuring not to irritate your sensitive skin, Yunho cleans you up, and together you and Mingi care for Yunho. Once you are all done, you flop on the bed with Yunho on his back and you half on top of him. Mingi cuddles up next to you, wrapping his arms around your waist while nuzzling his face into your shoulder. it was silent for a moment, the only things that could be heard were your bumping hearts and breathing that finally began to slow down. It was peaceful until Mingi opened his big, smug mouth.

“Ready for round two?”

You have never wanted to slap him so much as right now.

-

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[sergeantbarnessdoll]

Morning Swim » Tommy Lee

Pairings: Husband!Tommy Lee x Wife!Reader

Summary: Tommy and Y/N go for a morning swim.

Warnings: Smut (18+), language, dirty talk, kissing, hickeys, fingering, unprotected sex, pool sex, praise kink, pet names (babe, baby)

Written on my phone. I’m sorry for any mistakes and typos.

Header made by @buckys-wintersoldier

GIF IS NOT MINE! Credit goes to the creators.

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!🔞

You woke up to the feeling of your husband placing soft kisses along your shoulders, making you smile. You rolled over, capturing his lips in a sweet kiss. You two smiled against each other’s lips.

“So I was thinking…” Tommy starts and kisses your lips again. “We should go for a morning swim.” He suggests.

“I love the sound of that. We should make it interesting.” You say with a hint of mischief in your voice.

“Interesting how?” He asks.

“We should swim naked.” You say, biting your bottom lip.

“Even better.” He smirks.

Tommy got out of bed and stripped from his clothes which was only his underwear. His tattooed naked body was on display in front of you, making you lick your lips at the sight.

“C’mon, babe. Don’t leave me hanging.” Tommy says.

You giggled and got out of bed. You took off your -Tommy’s- shirt and panties, dropping them on the floor and revealing your naked body to your husband.

“Holy fuck.” He mumbles and licks his lips.

You smiled and walked towards the door.

“Come on, rockstar! The pool is calling our names!” You say from the doorway of yours and his bedroom.

Before you knew it, Tommy picked you up and threw you over his shoulder and smacked your bare ass causing you to squeal. He walked outside to the pool. You already knew he had a mischievous grin on his face.

“Tommy, I swear if you throw me in the pool, I’ll—” Tommy threw you in the pool before you could finish your sentence.

You came up above the cool water with a gasp. You brushed your wet hair from your face before glaring at your husband.

“You’ll what, babe? You didn’t finish your sentence.” He says with a smirk.

“Fuck you!” You say, playfully glaring at him.

Tommy jumped into the pool next to you, water splashing you. He came up above the water and pulled you closer to him.

“You did that last night.” He smirks. “You can do it again in the pool.” He says.

You bit your bottom lip at the thought. You wrapped your legs around his waist and kissed him hungrily. Tommy swan the two of you to the steps of the pool, laying you down on them and hovered over you. One of his hands slid down your body, stopping at your pussy. He quickly found your clit and began rubbing it in slow circles. You pulled away from the kiss to tilt your head back and moan softly. Tommy kissed along your neck. You gasped when you felt his teeth graze your skin. He bit down hard enough for a hickey. He moved his lips down to your collarbone and repeated his actions.

“You look so hot right now.” Tommy says against your collarbone.

His fingers rubbed up and down in between your folds. The tips of his fingers found your entrance and circled it causing you to whine.

“Tommy!” You whined.

“Yes, baby? Tell me what you want.” He says.

“Your fingers!” You begged.

Tommy slid two fingers in your pussy. Your jaw dropped, an inaudible moan left your lips. His fingers moved in and out of your pussy while his thumb rubbed your clit, turning you into a moaning mess. You held onto his shoulders, your nails digging in his skin.

“Oh god, yes!” You moaned.

You arched your back in pleasure, pushing your breasts towards his face. Tommy happily kissed along your breast and latched his lips on one of your nipples while his hand was massaging the other breast. You gasped when his teeth lightly grazed your nipple causing your pussy to clench around his finger at the sensation. Tommy moved his lips to your other breast, repeating his actions. One of your hands held the back of his head, your fingers tugging on his hair.

“You’re going to make me cum if you keep doing that.” You say with a moan.

“That’s the plan, babe.” Tommy says with a smirk.

Tommy’s thumb applied more pressure to your clit as he rubbed it. Your cunt clenched around his fingers as you came, a loud moan leaving your lips. You laid on the pool steps panting while looking into your husband’s eyes. You leaned up, kissing his lips hungrily.

“Fuck me.” You say against his lips.

Tommy didn’t need to be told twice. He lined his cock up at your tight entrance, slowly sliding it inside of you till he was balls deep inside of you.

“So fucking tight.” He moans.

His thrusts started off slow and loving, but then got faster and still loving. Tommy kissed along your neck and left hickeys on your skin as he was fucking you.

“You should see unbelievably beautiful you look right now.” He says, looking down at you.

Tommy was loving the sound of you moaning his name. It was music to his ears. He was also loving the blissed out look on your face. Your nails dug in his back as his thrusts got faster.

“Such a good girl for me, aren’t you, baby?” He says.

You moaned and nodded your head yes.

“My wife is always a good girl for her husband.” He praises.

You hummed in response. A gasp left your lips when his fingers started rubbing your clit causing your cunt to squeeze around his cock.

“Fuck, I love it when you do that.” Tommy moans, referring to the way your pussy was squeezing around his cock.

His thrusts became faster. His tip hitting your sweet spot over and over causing you to moan loudly.

“Right there, baby!” You moaned.

His cock hit that spot repeatedly. Soon your second orgasm started to build up the more he hit your sweet spot and rubbed your clit.

“I can feel you squeezing me, baby. You gonna cum for me?” He asks.

“Mhmm!” You moaned.

“Cum, baby.” He says.

His fingers rubbed your clit faster, helping you get closer and closer to the edge. His name left your lips with a loud moan as you came. Tommy fucked you through your orgasm. His thrusts became sloppy when he felt his orgasm building up.

“Oh fuck!” Tommy moans, tilting his head back.

Tommy came inside of you after a few thrusts, his cum painting your walls. His thrust came to a slow stop. Both of you were panting. He leaned down, kissing you passionately.

“That was one hell of a morning swim, babe.” Tommy says, grinning against your lips, making you to smile.

🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍

-Bucky’s Doll

[descendantsramblings]

Maybe some dating headcanons for Morgie and Hook with a more dominant gn! partner?

And maybe some nsfw headcanons if ur ok with it but no need

I do not do smut, however I will cross over into makeout scenes. So if you consider that nsfw then sure it's nsfw. I hope you meant together because that's surely how I did this.

Also this is so different from my normal posts tone wise, let me know how we feel about it?

Any way!!! I haven't written head canons since 2021 (I think the Gil ones? Maybe Harry's idk) it feels so good to write them again.

The Dominant Type

James Hook x GN! Reader x Morgie le Fay head canons

No pronouns used

'Warnings: Sfw dominance, make out/heated scenes including hickey mentions (probably the furthest I'd ever be comfortable going) , pet names, reader is possessive but not in a toxic way, Polyamory (obviously) I talk about Hook's hair an ungodly amount read into that what you will

Word Count: 1.6K

Originally, back in freshman year when it all started, it was just you and James

But by Junior year James couldn’t deny that Morgie had a thing for you, he knew it should make him jealous but something about how his roommate- his best friend- stared at you was so hot 

And you’d have to be stupid to pretend you didn’t see that the sorcerer had a little thing for your boyfriend, hazel eyes always locked on Hook’s pouty lips while the two spoke, constantly trying to find a reason to touch him

When the two of you confronted it, talking about the boy between lazy kisses, both of you came to the realization that you wanted him too

So who could blame you two for asking him if he wanted to join you?

At first, Hook tried to hide that he was so submissive when it came to you, but Morgie-Who had watched from the sidelines for years by that point- knew better than that. It was no shock that you wore the pants so to speak

Quickly it fell into a rhythm, You were always the dominant one while Morgie and Hook were both switches in their own right. There was no true rhyme or reason to who leaned more submissive, it just sorta worked out

Hook Focused head canons:

He won’t admit it outside of the two of you but James is needy

And a giant brat

You never know if you’re getting him lounged across you like a house cat or extreme sass and attitude until one of you puts him back in his place and you love the unknown aspect of it- of him

He loves to hit you with a “make me” when you tell him to do something (Morgie gets an equal but different “bite me”) just to see the way you smirk, knowing he’s in for it

He’d die if his other friends knew though (Something that drives Morgie crazy because Hook is the biggest tease he’s ever met and he loves to catch an attitude in the hideout) 

He loves to playfully pull away from your lips so you’ll thread your hands through his hair and force him to hold still while you kiss him properly, sighing into your mouth at the contact 

James adores when you baby him though, he longs for it

Morgie making him sit on the bathroom counter so he can shave his face or you straddling his lap and putting his makeup on for him

If his boots come untied, you’re on the ground tying them for him before his mind has fully processed that it even was undone.

Doing his hair for him, or messing up his hair, really just anything that has to do with you touching his hair

He loves to push his luck in public for the thrill of you or Morgie shoving him against the door or wall to kiss him the second you’re all alone

Pull his hair while kissing him, Force him to look you in the eye while you speak. He eats it up, he likes when you two get more aggressive with him, especially if it’s you. The way you refuse to deal with his attitude drives him wild 

If he thinks Morgie is getting more attention than him he’ll lay across the two of you and genuinely pout, whining about how you both “hate him and want him to die” because he is the most dramatic boy to ever live

You often hold his hook, leaving his good hand open for Morgie to take but if you’re in the middle of the two of them it’s always his good hand, rubbing calming circles on the back of it with your thumb

Buries his face in your neck when he’s upset, playing with his hair while he’s snuggled into you like that will always calm him down

He’s melting into your touch if you or Morgie wash his hair for him, it’s his favorite act of love

Polishing his hook for him is also a love language in his mind

If y'all are spooning he absolutely has to be the little spoon

Loves it when you undo his shirt for him absent-mindedly pressing kisses on his face and neck and shoulders as you do. There’s nothing more to it, just you doing something minor to care for him all on your own 

He can’t sleep alone, if you’re not over he’s curled up against Morgie (not that the sorcerer would complain about the way his head fits so perfectly in the side of his neck, the boy is so warm when even in the summer Morgie can find a reason to shiver) 

You call him “Honey” and he just melts, kissing you before you can finish your sentence or staring you with those big puppy dogs eyes until you kiss him

Morgie Focused Head canons:

Unlike his boyfriend, Morgie very rarely has an attitude but by god is he clingy

Making grabby hands at one of you when you dare to be in a different part of the room from him

Laying on your back if you’re refusing to cuddle him for any reason because he needs the closeness

Adores laying on top of you with his arms tucked underneath you 

And he doesn’t care who sees it when he’s being needy, he proudly claims the two of you, you make him feel safe

He can pout like no one’s business though, Morgie knows how to get his way and make Hook think it was his idea (doesn’t work on you though, something he’s come to accept) 

Hug him from behind, it makes him feel good to know you give him affection just because you want to and not because he asks for it

He doesn’t prefer to be babied but he does like to be taken care of, to him there’s a major difference

Loves when you put one of your jackets on him and zip it up for him or when you drape it over his shoulders when you notice him shivering

Or standing between your -or Hook’s legs- letting you wash his face after calming him down, the gentle motions gaining  you all of his attention

He prefers to be in between you two, the middle spoon or the middle person while y’all are walking side by side, he likes to know he has both of his partner’s attention without having to fight for it. 

Doesn’t mind if you or Hook get rough with him but he prefers gentle touches. Softly hold his jaw while you kiss him, slide a hand into his back pocket when you walk with an arm around him. Card your fingers through his hair while he’s laying in your arms talking to you

He likes to sit on the floor, between your knees with his head in your lap while you play with his hair

He loves verbal dominance too. “Let me help you”, “Baby, come here”, “That’s my boy” it makes him feel appreciated, like you really see him 

Sits on your lap a lot, likes to feel your arms wrapped around his waist and your cheek pressed against his shoulder (likes it more when you tell him to do it)

He’s definitely the type to distract you from what you need to get done so he can lay in your arms for longer

Loves praise, you can get him flustered by simply telling him he did a good job on a test

Whiny, worse than Hook when it comes to being whiny, the boy nearly begs for things

Loves it when you get possessive over him, especially when Uliana is giving him a tough time

Nuzzles against you like he’s trying to scent you (maybe he is)

Call him “Baby”, “Sugar”, or “Sweetheart” and he’s a mess between your adoring hands, eyes looking up at you with stars in them 

Even if he’s not as submissive, he’ll sometimes ask you for permission for things (Mainly if you’re kissing James and he wants to)

When he is feeling completely submissive though, he loves looking to you for approval, nearly glowing if you specifically give him permission to do something without him having to ask (not that he needs your permission to begin with)

More of them together:

Morgie isn’t a brat on his own but when they’re both feeling more submissive Hook has no trouble coaxing him to be bratty with him. You have your work cut out for you if it’s one of those days. Nothing’s worse than one sassy man but two of them 

If you are sleeping over, most of the time you lay between them, they’ll both lay their head on your chest, letting their intertwined hands rest on your stomach. You’ll scratch Morgie’s head with the hand on his side while your other arm is around James’ waist pinning him to you with all three of your legs becoming one big tangle in Morgie’s bed

Grabbing the nape of Hook’s neck to pull him off of Morgie’s lips when you walk in on them making out, kissing him from behind while Morgie’s lips find a new home on the boy’s jaw. His half-lidded doe eyes look so pretty while he’s looking at you with hunger in them. 

Or holding Morgie still while Hook tickles him, the boy is absolutely the most ticklish person you know. 

They both love seeing you get jealous, especially since they know you can’t get set off by them. Heaven forbid some princess starts flirting with James or Uliana gets too handsy while trying to get Morgie to do something she wants. They know they’re going to end up with your hands all over them, whispering in their ear about how they better know they’re yours. It’s unbelievably hot to them

Heaven forbid they decide they want you to stop what you’re doing so you’ll pay attention to them, they’re pulling out all the stops until they can get what they want from you. 

You’re always touching one of them in some way, sometimes both of them. A hand on Hook’s shoulder, a leg thrown over Morgie’s lap, your arms both wrapped around their waists. 

Leaving visible hickeys on them, literally marking them as yours -especially on their jawlines or collar bones (something Morgie does in fact beg for) 

Sometimes Morgie kisses James purely so you’ll grab him by the neck to focus him back onto you. He doesn’t do it often but something about kissing you over his shoulder like that while James’ hands are on his hips is intoxicating

[kyurizeu]

Dangerous game (pt 2)

This is a quick part 2 some of you were asking for and I thought i should give you a treat before i dive into exams again🫶🏻

Wc: 555 words

Fyi: its a quick drabble and the smut scene is quick

Warnings: unprotected sex (wrap it before u tap it), praises kinda, kissing and maybe a mention of hickeys but not necessarily…

Summary: part 2 of dangerous game (pt1)

Pairing: Jungwon X reader

Not proofread!!

————————————————————

It was an uncomfortable situation to explain to your friends where the hickeys appeared on your neck… you couldn’t concentrate on anything in class feeling frustrated that it ended like the way it did. You decided to just scroll on tiktok in class to bring your mind to something else than the fact how painfully horny that situation made you.

As soon as you opened your phone you saw an instagram dm from Jungwon: “we can’t leave things like we did.. meet me at the locker room” so you excused yourself from class.

Walking into the locker room you quickly felt a cold hand pull your waist to the bathroom and you felt yourself being pushed harshly against a wall. “You seriously ran off like that? so mean….” Leaning super close to your face smirking. You blushed as he crashed his lips onto yours once again but this time, his hand started groping your thighs aggressively. Almost immediately you felt hot and sweaty deciding to take your shirt off never breaking the kiss.

He took one look up and down at you making you shiver and pull his face towards you by his neck again. All of a sudden the locker room filled up with laughter and chattering. “It’s the soccer team..” you mumbled against jungwons lips. “So? You cant just go out now. They’ll see you” he places his finger on your lips squeezing your cheeks together cooing at you. He started going down to kiss around your neck and boobs. You felt so needy and frustrated from the teasing you couldn’t help but whine quietly. “You’re such a cute mess right now y/n…” he looked up at you with his cat eyes while unbuttoning your pants woth his delicate hands. You bit your lip as his hands made their way onto your soaking panties. He got up and looked into your eyes making you shiver. “Turn around princess.” You felt like you’d never seen this side of him before but at this point the feeling you felt, you would’ve done anything this man wanted you to. You turned around feeling the fabric of your panties rip instantly, making you quickly whimper out of shock. Jungwon placed your hair onto one side of your neck gently whispering to you: “please tell me if it hurts mkay?” His cold hands went down on your waist as he lined up in your entrance and caressing his fingers on your hips he slid into you slowly. You try to muffle your moans but he takes your hands in his and puts them up on the wall under his. The deep thrusts hit the deepest spots inside of you making you moan really loudly. “Music to my ears” he feels that he’s close and senses that you’re close as well. He starts rubbing your clit slowly, wrapping one arm around your waist. “Jun-Jungwon m-mcumming..” he kissed the back of your head thrusting one more time the deepest he could painting your walls white as you rode your high. You shook there for a bit as he cleaned you two and dressed both of you up. “You did so well y/n” he held your chin up pecking at your lips and opening the bathroom door revealing Sunghoon and Jakes shocked faces in front of you two.

————————————————————

[billys-pretty-babe]

Focused On You

Pairing : Billy Hargrove x Fem!Reader

Summary : Billy always focuses on your needs, you're his top priority in and out of the bedroom.

Billy pictures from Pinterest, Djo lyrics from Apple Music.

Warnings : this is all smut 😔 [oral - f receiving, unprotected sex, creampie] aftercare, swearing

Word count : 2,588

A/N : This particular lyric in general makes my brain go brrr so.... Figure You Out by Djo

His left hand was on your jaw, thumb at your lips as he kissed down your neck, letting his teeth drag across the skin, his fingers from his right hand trailing over your side, starting from your ribs and ending at your hip bone, making you shiver.

"This okay," he asked gruffly, voice a little deeper than normal. You nodded quickly, making him laugh at how eager you were. His lips trailed down to your collarbone, sucking a hickey onto the bone, lips trailing down the valley of your breasts as he ogled them, trying not to get distracted at the task at hand.

"Wanna tell me what you want," he asked as his lips ghosted over your skin as he looked up at you, his pupils dilated with lust, rings of blue nearly gone. You shook your head quickly, you didn't know what you wanted, only one thing came to mind. Him.

He laughed against the skin of your torso, gently nipping at it, kissing right below your belly button. He ducked down and kissed the front of your underwear and the heel of your foot dug into the middle of his back, trying to pull him closer. Your fingers itched to grab his hair and keep him where he was but instead you grabbed the sheets.

He noticed your struggle and laughed once more, "You can touch me, it's okay baby. You just gotta tell me what you want." You groaned in frustration, he always did this and you still could never go in explicit detail of what you actually want, just giving him a vague answer.

"Just want you." He nodded, sitting up on his knees, his own shirt off as he wore sweatpants, the band of his underwear sitting right below his trimmed happy trail. His hands slid into the legs of your underwear, looking at you, "Are you sure this is what you want?" You nodded, biting the inside of your lip as you watched him pull the material down, throwing it behind him where the rest of your clothes were.

He grabbed your thighs, squeezing them as he pulled you so your head was sitting on the mattress and not the pillows. He kissed the side of your knee, placing your legs on his shoulders as he lowered himself. Glancing up at you once more, he moved his arms to spread you out, his hands going to hold the sides of your body, his silver ring resting on your skin. "Take my ring off, baby. I don't want it to get messy." You picked his left hand up, taking the ring off, placing it on the wooden bedside table.

He kissed the inside of both of your thighs, sucking two more hickeys on the skin. His hands trailed down to your thigh, gripping them as he spread your legs more. "There we go," he nodded his head, looking up at you, a small smirk on his lips. His large hands moved to the side of your thighs, his thumbs spreading you open wider so you were on complete display for him.

"Look at that, already making a mess on my sheets and I haven't even done anything." You watched as his head lowered before you felt his tongue on you and almost instantly your breathing became heavy. Your boyfriend was extremely experienced, which at times like this, you were very thankful that he knew female anatomy and wasn't just thumbing at skin thinking it was your clit.

His tongue licked a long, wide strip up, stopping at your clit as his lips enclosed around the bundle of nerves as he began light suckling, his tongue still lightly flicking across the top of it. Your fingers grabbed a handful of his hair which had already become frizzy, as you pulled and you felt him laugh, even feeling the smile form on his lips.

Your back bowed as you felt the laugh, the vibrations on your clit. He let go, looking up at you as you saw how messy his mouth and chin were. Your body became warm from embarrassment, you had never been this turned on. He dipped back down, licking another stripe but stopping below your clit, the tip of his tongue gently licking over your soaked hole, the tip of his tongue barely dipping inside before you clenched.

He squeezed your thighs, your skin sitting between his fingers the more he squeezed. Billy moved back barely an inch before you heard, then felt his spit dripping down from your clit as he took his left hand from your thigh, using his middle and ring finger to spread the spit downwards, circling before they slowly pushed into you. He watched you, making sure nothing was painful for you, his eyes boring into yours.

Your own right hand gripping his sheets tightly and he laughed, kissing your knee, a slick stained lip mark now on your skin. "Feel good, baby?" You nodded and he crooked his fingers, watching you, still making sure there was no pain for you. Your back arched, nothing dramatic, just enough for your own body to know that there was pleasure, an immense amount of pleasure that you were receiving.

"Feels so good," you said, your breathing so heavy that the words nearly came out in a pant. He dipped down again, lips around your clit, sucking softly, not wanting to overstimulate you too much before you could get to the best part. At times like this, you swore he knew your body better than you ever would.

You weren't as experienced as Billy, only having one sexual partner before him, your very first boyfriend and not once did you ever feel pleasure like Billy gave you in the near year the two of you had been together.

Billy looked up at you, seeing that your head was somewhere else. He pulled off of you, tapping your thigh with his ring finger on his right hand. "Baby, hey, get outta your head." Your eyes snapped down to him, an apology on the tip of your tongue before he softly smiled at you. "Everything okay? Do I need to do something different?" You shook your head, "Feels good, just a little faster with your fingers, please." He nodded and wrapped his lips on your clit again, speeding his fingers up.

Your fingers tightened on his hair and the bed sheets, as you let out a loud moan that could have been mistaken for a cry if someone outside could hear the two of you. He pulled back with a soft pop, talking you through your orgasm, his head resting on your leg as his eyes watched your face and watched his fingers, seeing the mess you were making on him. "There we go, that's a good girl." He kissed your knee once more, gently pulling his fingers out of you.

You looked up at the ceiling, letting his hair go as your hand dropped down. He laughed at you and your eyes snapped to him. "What's so funny?" He snickered once more, popping his two fingers into his mouth. He wiped his chin with the palm of his hand, licking his lips. "What's so funny," you asked again, your breathing going back to normal.

"You. You're so dramatic." You rolled your eyes, "Says you, you literally just did that and expected me to be normal about it." He laughed, leaning forward and kissing you quickly. Your hand reached for the elastic on his sweatpants and he grabbed your hand. "Don't worry about that, tonight's about you, not me." You went to protest and he took the grey sweats off, making you snap your mouth shut as you watched him, watching the way his muscle contracted and relaxed.

He glanced at you, watching you gawk at him and he let out a soft laugh, shaking his head. "How do you want me," he asked, his hands on the outside of your legs, thumbs rubbing your knees. Usually he would just put your body into whatever position would arise, no thought process behind it.

You shrugged, "I don't know, don't really care. They all feel good to me." He nodded, "Stay on your back then." You agreed, as you watched him finish undressing. He grabbed your thighs again, spreading your legs as he situated himself, leaning over you, his hands now on both sides of your head. He kept his balance on his left hand, watching your eyes, despite them being half-lidded. "Ready?" You nodded, "Ready."

He nodded, trailing his hand down your body, the backs of his fingers caressing your skin the lower his hand went. His hand left your body as he grabbed the base of his cock, the slightly trimmed curls on his pelvis touching the side of his fist. He nudged your right leg with his hip and you spread your legs a little wider to accommodate him more.

He tapped his tip on your clit, one, two, three times before sliding the tip down as it caught onto you. "Ready?" You nodded and he shook his head. "Words, pretty girl." You grumbled, sexually frustrated, just needing him in you. "I'm ready." He nodded, slowly and gently sliding into you. You wrapped your legs around his waist as he bottomed out, the two of you moaning as he leaned forward, wanting, no, needing to be as close as possible to you. His hands found purchase in the sheets beside your head once more.

His hips moved, another moan leaving your mouth, your mouth just inches away from his. Your hands went to his sides, nails digging in as he sped up his movements slightly, not fast enough to bring you close to another orgasm, just fast enough to where you could both enjoy it. "Can I hold your hand," you asked breathlessly as he hit that sweet spot so deliciously with every single thrust. His left hand held your right tightly as he leaned down and kissed you.

You whined against his lips as he stopped thrusting, his hips moving in a grinding motion, the coarse hair rubbing your clit just right. "Does that feel good, babe," he asked, lips ghosting over yours as he pulled away so the two of you could breathe. "Mhm," he came out more high-pitched than you wanted it to and he chuckled softly, leaning his head down to lay a few kisses to your collarbone and shoulder.

"Love you so much, so fucking much," he said before gently biting you, then licking the bite. "I love yo-" he cut you off with a particularly hard thrust as your left hand dug into the muscles on his back. You tightened your legs around his hips. "Whatcha need, baby? I'll give you anything, just tell me." Another whimper left your throat, if sweet dirty talk was a crime your boyfriend would be in prison for life.

"Everything, I want everything you can give me." He nodded, pecking your lips once more before his thrusts sped up, not too erratic but enough to where your body moved each time. He moved so his chest was on top of your breasts as he moved his right hand to the top of your head so you wouldn't hit it on the headboard.

"Oh fuck," he moaned, his own breathing getting heavy. Sweat began to build up on his back, his skin beginning to stick to yours. You held him tightly, your own moans filling the bedroom, expletives and his name flying out of your mouth. You were hurtling towards your second and final orgasm.

Billy knew what you needed as he let go of your hand, picking his body up just enough to snake his hand between the two of you, placing two fingers on your clit as he began circles at the very top, where you were the most sensitive. You began to clench around him, and he looked at you, his own eyes were half-lidded.

"Let go for me, I'm right here, baby. I've got you." His words were what did you in, back arching once more, clenching sporadically around him as he talked you through your orgasm. He leaned back forward, just needing you against him. He was so close, he was twitching inside of you.

You looked up at him, his moans were becoming engraved into your brain. The moans of your name, how hot they sounded with how breathless he was, this was everything and more. "Baby, fuck, I'm gonna," he was breathless and it made your heart race. If you weren't already turned on, you would be just from listening to his moans.

One last hard thrust as he was completely bottomed out, he was grinding his hips as he spilled inside of you. His head fell, his hair falling into his face, covering the two of you as a few strands tickled your nose. "Fuck," he moaned, eyes fluttering shut for a minute before opening them, laughing softly.

"Fuck, that was good. Was it good for you too?" You quickly nodded, "Really really good." He laughed, kissing you as he gently pulled out, knowing the two of you were sensitive. He quickly grabbed the tissues that he kept beside his bed as he cleaned you up, throwing the body fluid soaked tissues into his trash can.

He laid beside you, catching his breath as he looked at you. He held your hand, just looking at you, taking in everything, the way your body looked ethereal after an orgasm, his mind taking a picture of you to keep forever. "Water, food, cuddles? Whatcha need, babe?" You laughed, trying to catch your own breath as he laughed at you, "Why're you out of breath? You laid there looking pretty." You laughed again, "Water, then cuddles. I'm tired now." He nodded, reaching over and grabbing a bottle of water that he had gotten before your shirt came off nearly an hour ago.

He handed it to you, the cap already off as he sat you up so he could fix the bed. He grabbed clothes as he slipped on a pair of underwear, giving you his old Hawkins High gym shorts and one of his white shirts. You gave him the water, thanking him and watched him chug the rest of the water, some of the water missing his mouth as it trailed down his jugular, and down his chest and torso.

He wiped the sweat from his body, fixing the pillows. "Blanket or no blanket?" You were hot, you were pretty sure you were on the verge of overheating. "No blanket with the fan on, please." He nodded, going to the wall and turning the switch on before he walked to the ceiling fan, pulling a pull chain that turned off the light as he pulled the second one, turning the fan speed to medium.

He laid back down beside you, pecking your lips multiple times before cuddling you as you placed your head on his chest. "I love you," you said as you scratched his back. "I love you too," he said, his own fingers tracing random shapes on your back, his hands having slipped underneath the shirt that you wore. He began humming a soft tune that you instantly recognized. "Is that Donna Summer?" He laughed, his own eyes shut as he nodded.

You shut your eyes, listening to the hums of your boyfriend as the sound lulled you to sleep, the both of you falling asleep in bliss and happiness.

[genshingorlsrevengeance]

Oooh can we get the waking up one with SPAS too? She's so cute and morning cuddles would be oh so nice with her.

and of course the thoughts about the night before but shhhhh.

I was gonna mention listening to her heartbeat as well but... T-Dolls don't really have those, huh? Somehow I don't know if mechanical whirring is as comforting.

wait actually. it kinda would be. maybe I just find 'signs of life' comforting...

(GFL) SPAS-12, Angelia, Kalina, AN-94, and RPK-16 with their S/O the morning after

NSF-W IMPLICATIONS BELOW THE CUT! obviously

SPAS yawns loudly as she snuggles closer to S/O, her chest acting as a second pillow for their arms.

(SPAS-12) "Hm...what time is it...?"

(S/O) "Hah, morning. It's just eight right now, SPAS."

(SPAS-12) "Mn..."

Her eyes start to close before it suddenly shoots wide open.

(SPAS-12) "AH! W-We can't oversleep, they're finally serving pancakes in the mess hall!"

She sits completely upright, the blanket still hanging off her large chest with ease.

S/O shivers at the sudden cold brushing against their skin before they chuckle, one hand reaching for hers.

(S/O) "At nine, SPAS. You can rest for a little longer. I promise I'll get you double the amount."

SPAS pouts, before cuddling back into S/O, noticing they were respectfully keeping their eyes above neck level.

(SPAS-12) "Alright...You promised, remember!"

With a kiss on their forehead, she can't resist making a small giggle as well.

(S/O) "Yes yes, I know. Besides, it'll give us plenty of time to shower."

(SPAS-12) "But I don't really need to, as much as you do. I see a stain on your neck."

S/O blushed as their hand felt the outline of a hickey.

(S/O) "...S-SPAS, that was from you."

(SPAS-12) "Huh? I didn't-"

Memories from last night came flooding in.

(SPAS-12) "...O-Oh."

Angelia brushes the hair out of S/O's eyes as she gently smiles.

(S/O) "Mn...? Ange?"

(Angelia) "About time. We gotta get up soon."

(S/O) "Hah, easy for you to say. You weren't the one draining me for everything I had-"

(Angelia) "Then we just need to get your endurance up. Think of it as special training."

Angelia gets up, the scars on her body completely visible.

For a brief moment, she gets a bit self conscious about them, her hand covering them up before seeing S/O's arm reach for her prosthetic.

S/O sits up with them, and kisses the top of her metal hand.

(Angelia) "You stupid or something? I can't feel anything with that arm."

(S/O) "Then how about this?"

Angelia blushes when S/O kisses the scar near her chest lovingly, wrapping their arms around her stomach.

(S/O) "You're beautiful, Ange."

(Angelia) "...Only a dumbass would call scars beautiful."

She doesn't look at them as her remaining hand holds S/O's.

Kalina groggily opens her eyes, muttering something as she rubs them, suddenly feeling a warmth next to her.

(Kalina) "What the hell is-"

(S/O) "Hah, morning to you too, Kalina."

(Kalina) "...S/O? What are you doing in my-"

Kalina suddenly notices the lack of clothes on them. And herself.

(Kalina) "...Oh. Right."

Her cheeks quickly heat up as she coughs into her mouth awkwardly, feeling a little more at ease hearing S/O's laugh.

(S/O) "Wow, so flustered. You sure weren't like that last night-"

(Kalina) "H-Hey, don't tease me! I'm just not used to the sight of you next to me as soon as I wake up is all!"

S/O hugged Kalina, which she relaxed into their embrace.

(S/O) "Well, you can get used to it if you want my help."

(Kalina) "Heh, that doesn't sound like the worst idea."

94's eyes flutter open, seeing S/O still asleep.

A soft smile overtakes her lips as she carefully moves closer, hugging them.

(AN-94) "...Is this how you do it?"

(S/O) "It's more like this-"

94's body stiffens when S/O suddenly holds them.

(AN-94) "You were awake?"

(S/O) "For a little bit now. I didn't want to wake you up since you looked so peaceful."

(AN-94) "Thank you for your consideration but-"

She was about to follow up on how she didn't need rest like they did, instead just smiling and resting her head into S/O's neck.

(AN-94) "-...Never mind. You looked peaceful as well."

They both remained there, quiet as they warmed each other up under the blankets with their bare skin touching.

Was...this how romance was supposed to be? There was nothing in her databanks that could even describe how this felt.

16's finger pokes S/O's nose, stirring them awake.

(RPK-16) "Ah, that finally woke you up."

(S/O) "Hm...I thought I felt something touching me repeatedly."

S/O's face quickly became more alert, now becoming aware of what they had said.

(S/O) "A-Ah, I meant you just trying to wake me up!"

(RPK-16) "Strange, shouldn't I be the one saying that after last night?"

She laughs at their reaction, resting on her stomach as she looked at S/O with such curiosity in her eyes.

(RPK-16) "And all your bravado seems to disappear in the morning. Is that a human thing, or is that just you?"

(S/O) "Psh, as if I could ever match your attitude when it comes to these things, 16."

16 just hummed at that, being entertained by how hard they were trying to not stare at her sideboob.

(RPK-16) "What a lovely morning to wake up to, wouldn't you agree?"

[imagine-a-life-like-this]

Always Him : Prologue

Word Count : 1k

Warnings : swearing, food mention, mentions of sex, mentions of being tied up, mention of arson, kinda angsty, kinda crackheadassery

A/N : Just a brief introduction to some of the characters! Hope you enjoy the mess that is about to come.

          She woke up wrapped in his arms for the third time that week. He always seemed to hold her closer when he’s sleeping, their bodies contorting into one mess of limbs, but she loved it. Loved how peaceful he looked, loved seeing how perfect they fit together. Like two puzzle pieces specifically made for one another.

            She would allow herself to imagine what life would be like if they were more than friends. If he loved her outside of his bedroom. And then she would slowly remove herself from his hold and sneak back into her room, laying in her own bed, dreaming of the day Hongjoong would let her in.

~

            “Wake the fuck up, we’re going to be late again.” Mae said as she jumped on top of Y/n. “Whatever, or whoever, it is you’re doing at night, you need to stop or you’ll fail out of uni.” Y/n groaned as she wrapped her arms around Mae, rolling both of them over, and pretended to keep sleeping. “This works too. Goodnight.”

            “Fuck sake Mae, you were supposed to be waking her up, not falling asleep with her.” Kayla said as she walked into the room, yanking the covers off both of them, causing both of them to groan and beg for 5 more minutes. “Yunho is here with coffee and breakfast. Get dressed and be downstairs in 10 minutes. Both of you.”

            “Yes mom.” Mae groaned, sliding out of bed, and walking over to Y/n’s closet. She looked through her clothes, picking out an outfit for her, and throwing it towards the bed Y/n was still laying in. “Put that on. It’ll drive whoever you’re fucking crazy when they see you.”

            “Who said I was fucking anyone?” Y/n pouted back, quickly slipping on the outfit that Mae chose for her.

            “The hickeys on your tits. And the one on your neck. Might want to put some concealer on babes. I’ll meet you downstairs.” With a kiss to her cheek, Mae left Y/n’s room, who was now standing in front of her mirror, curing Hongjoong in her mind while trying to cover up all 5 hickeys he left.

            “Thanks Yunho.” Y/n said as she ran down the stairs and into his arms. “You always know how to make mornings better.” He gave her an extra squeeze before letting her go.

            “I should go check on the others. When I left the apartment, Jongho was making his way inside, so I’m sure Wooyoung is there by now. Gotta make sure they didn’t let Mingi near the kitchen.”

            “Is he back to setting things on fire again?” Kayla asked from the comfort of Seonghwa’s lap. He had his arms wrapped tightly around her so she wouldn’t go anywhere, leaving her to have to feed him his breakfast. It was a routine at this point, a sight everyone was so used to seeing that they’d be more confused if they sat separately.

            “You’re talking as if he ever stopped. Introducing him to Mae was the worst idea.”

            “That’s my baby!” Y/n laughed, high-fiving Mae, and then San who wanted to be included.

            “I did nothing but show him his true potential.” Mae replied matter-of-factly. “Besides, it’s only arson if you get caught.” Kayla reached into her purse for the tiny spray bottle she started carrying around once she became a mom to the group of idiots, and sprayed Mae in the face.

            “Bad Mae. We don’t do crime.”

            “Be gay. Do crime.” Y/n chimed in, earning herself a spray from the spray bottle.

~

            The 6 of them walked to school together as they do everyday. Seonghwa and Kayla were holding hands, swinging their arms back and forth, as she continued her conversation with Mae and Y/n, who were walking with linked arms. San was on the other side, his arm draped across Mae, every once in a while giving his own opinion on whatever the conversation was. Hongjoong walked slightly ahead of everyone else, every once in a while glancing back to see Y/n already looking at him.

            He had hoped she wouldn’t cover the marks he left. Hoped she would show them off proudly, but he should have known she would cover them. They were just friends, nothing more than friends that live under one roof. Friends that keep ending up in each other’s beds. Like an undeniable force bringing them together over and over again.

            He couldn’t stop looking at her. Glancing back every few seconds to look at her again, hoping no one else would notice. Every time he saw her, it was like the songs wrong themselves. Lyrics floated around in his mind. But friends write songs about friends all the time.

            Maybe his songs verge on love songs with the way he describes the feelings he has. How beautiful he finds her, how drawn to her he is. It’s like she understands him in way no one else does, and he could spend the rest of his life with just her, and he would be happy. But it’s all platonic, mixed with some physical attraction. How could he not want to fuck her when she looks at him with a pout on her face but dirty words dripping from her lips?

            She made it impossible to be around her without thinking of all the dirty things she’s begged him to do to her. He looks at her and can’t help but to picture her all tied up and helpless with his head in between her legs. That happens between friends sometimes, right?

            He wasn’t in love with her. He couldn’t be. She was just a friend he enjoyed fucking into submission most nights. Friends with benefits if you will.

            But maybe if he could take just one second to see the hearts in her eyes when she looks at him, he would see things differently. If he could get out of his head long enough to see that she allows him to use her because in those moments she can pretend he loves her, maybe he could see that friends don’t look at friends that way.  

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