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soundrooms · 6 years ago

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Soundrs: DJ CYBERDAD

My name is John Verchot, I’ve released music under several names: J-chot as well as DJ CYBERDAD. Locally, I’m usually just billed as DJ Verchot. I feel like the first thing I should tell you about myself is that I have severe ADHD, which seems to be the single most consistent force guiding my art and existence. I often get distracted and always get ahead of myself when I try to explain things. DJ CYBERDAD started out as a funny pseudonym to release more profane songs that I didn’t want my son to hear, but changed into an outlet for my smoother dance jams as well as more introspective music.

What are your inspiration sources?

It varies from project to project. Often times with tracks, the inspiration to work on them comes in two or three different phases. Inspiration to create sounds is one thing, as inspiration to finish and structure tracks, create moods/themes, or even package them into a finished project, all feel like different driving forces/processes that need to happen in order for me to get anything done. However, whichever one of those forces I am able to utilize when I sit down at my laptop often seems to be beyond my control.

Most times I’ll hear a sound, loop or phrase, I’ll start to wonder what I can do with it, or how I can change and manipulate it. It might be the timbre of an old instructional video’s narrator, or an odd metallic sound I’ve managed to coax out of some equipment. Occasionally I’ll think of a concept, either of overall sound or thematic content and before I know it, I’ve got half a track planned out in my head. Many times I’ll hear other tracks or songs, and want to use just one part/concept/sound or re-do the whole track differently. With “Emotional in Destin”, I was trying to convey moods or feelings I felt during an unexpected trip to Florida in the middle of a crushing depression. It sounds bizarre, but I've never channeled personal experiences into my music before.

Overall what inspires me to create different sounds is the novelty of technology and bits and other people’s music.

What makes me want to sit down and make music is personal or professional success.

What inspires me to finish tracks and projects is the distant white noise of overwhelming anxiety and dread setting in as the ennui of the imminent collapse of western society fades giving way to the dark, almost imperceivable thrumming of the void drawing nearer, and is definitely getting louder. Your “time” is almost up John. Did you even do anything, or are you too skiddish and feeble of heart and head to make any clear decisions, impulsively flitting from one animal urge to another bad habit, clogging the chemical receptors of your brain for simple stupid pleasure. It’s night now and your eyes and fingers grow weary…

What was the question again?

Tell us something about your workflow.

Most times, it starts with just noodling around. Sometimes, it’s with synths and sequencers, either recording sounds or looping notes and tweaking/loading patches (virtual or real synths), sometimes I’m browsing potential sample material, but what happens next is the same regardless of how I’m making sounds or what I’m doing:

…I think hear something.

…And I STOP noodling. Basically, I either hear something I like, or I hit a riff or whatever and it’s like a tiny, tiny light bulb that blinks barely. Occasionally it’s like a hundred watt, and other ideas quickly fall into place. Most times, it’s a process of trial and error, but I’m making sure to document or isolate the little pieces that click and then attempt to refine or improve on those ideas. Ideas can quickly diverge, multiple sets with different names get saved, and I often jump around and get lost. I use color coding on clips and pieces in Ableton to help me sort those ideas. Some ideas form by running one sequence I’ve had already through a whole different synth/patch.

Very rarely, I’ll get a concrete idea while I’m driving, maybe I’ll make some notes on my phone (text to speech notes, voice recording).

When I get a spark that makes me imagine a full concept (“Charles Nelson Riley”, or that “My P**sy tastes like Pepsi Cola” remix for example), the track is formed VERY quickly (four to eight hours working time) and I finish the mix, structure, everything. This is rare, but these tracks are almost always my better material.

The next step is always the same: Let the track “cool-off”. Leave it alone. Do something else for a few days, or weeks… or in some cases, years… Then I’ll fuck around with it even more, or move on to:

STRUCTURE & MIXING:

I look for/experiment with arrangements that compliment my DJ style, or allow someone to do a rough edit if they want, (breakdowns at the end), or I’ll load a track that I like to DJ that’s similar enough and I will STRAIGHT UP copy the song structure in terms of intro, (drums or keys?) repeating bits, breakdowns, outros… Most times I fuck with it until it sounds okay, which is kinda bad because I end up drastically overscrutinizing it.

When it comes to mixing, something that I should do more often but don’t is load a reference track (someone else’s track) and try to get my mix to sound like theirs… This technique REALLY helps stop “nasty surprises” when you listen to it on a big system, or in the car.

Most of the time, I’ve been tweaking the mix the entire time I’ve been working on the project.

TL;DR

The “Emotional in Destin” EP is almost entirely soft synths, but lately my flow is:

1. dick around on hardware

2. “oh that sounds good, let me make another sound to go with it” (see step 1)

3. record a few pieces to an Ableton project.

4. “I don't know what to do now.” …maybe mixing or structure…

…almost ALL THE TIME, however I jump around and do everything very non-linearly. Hardware helps me not spend so much time tweaking patches or EQ-ing a snare drum for an hour. Texture is SUPER important to me, so I’ll often get hung up on EQ and compression before I even start on structure or mixing.

How would creative rituals benefit your workflow?

The hardest part for me is ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS getting started, or shifting gears from other activities (resting after work, reading tumblr, goofing off…) and going to sit down at my desk and start music stuff. I’m certain it’s an executive dysfunction thing. The less I think about doing it before I do it, the better.

Animal sacrifice SIGNIFICANTLY speeds things up. Try not to get blood on the gear/laptop, and make sure never to clean, but regularly sharpen the ceremonial dagger (VERY important).

How do you get in the zone?

I don’t really try…

As soon as I start to approach a task as “a thing” I get nervous and anxious. If I go “okay, I’ve got this task to complete…” my subconscious hijacks my higher functions to make me look at memes or tumblr for three hours instead of do what I “should” or “want”… The problem with me in the past has been how do I get OUT of the zone?

How do you start a track?

Oh jeez, I really jumped the shark with that question earlier, didn’t I? A technique I’ll sometimes employ is load up an old track, keep the drum sounds/patches but delete all the data, and make an entirely different genre of track… or one that's very similar… That’s kind of a fun exercise if nothing else. Also it often winds up getting tweaked and adjusted to hell and back.

Do you have a special template?

Nope. I make TONS of drum, EQ, and effects presets though. And they all have terrible names like “gooddrums”, “$GOODrums” and such.

Even though I’ve started with carbon copies, they ALWAYS end up sounding completely different by the time I’m finished with the track, because I can’t leave em well enough alone.

What do you put on the master channel?

Sometimes EQ, but always a phat ass compressor (limiting). I’ve been thinking about investing in a nice non-free one lately, but for some reason I am not comfortable with purchasing software plugins… I also have learned recently, that I’ve been using compression on the individual tracks way too much… which makes final-mixing a pain in the ass.

How do you arrange and finish a track?

DAMN IT. I really did go too hard with the first couple questions. The “finishing” of a track for me (arrangement, mixing) is usually done much later than the rest of the process. I try not to force stuff, but lately I’m realizing more and more that I need to not do this as much.

I can’t stress enough how using a reference track for structure or mixing can very often break up stagnation on a project.

How do you deal with unfinished projects?

Several ways. The first step is to judge an old file and see if it's worth finishing. If there is ANYTHING of creative/sonic merit, I put it in a folder with the other “sketches and ideas” (project graveyard). Otherwise, I have been trying to delete the “junk” projects… this can make it easier to focus. Another thing I often do is to make presets/patches/Ableton instruments from the parts I like, then drop it in a folder called “meh”. Or I drop them into several categorical folders, i.e.: “uncircumcised electro bangers”, “abrasive techno”.

How do you store and organize your projects?

Aw jeez. Oh gosh-oh darn. (See above answer.)

How do you take care of studio ergonomics?

Trial and error, trial and error, trial and error. This year alone my studio has been restructured and moved about my downstairs room at least five times. I’ve finally settled on something that feels very useful and productive. I am also this way with my work station at my job. CHANGE IT UNTIL IT WORKS GREAT. This can also help with creative stagnation, or can trigger it, so be careful. I keep my “electronics laboratory” close at hand so that more of that tinkering can find it’s way into my music… no such luck, YET.

I’ve currently decorated my space with all the crap I’ve saved up over the years, that for some reason, I’ve looked at this and thought: “This makes me happy” …SUUURE, my studio now looks like a fourteen year old decorated it, but I gotta say, I feel pretty phenomenal. Soon I’m gonna try to put this “stars and space” wall paper on my ceiling… I’ll update with a photo when that’s done.

Also I would like to say:

Minimalist spaces and studios are bullshit, y’all look like sick baby birds in empty shoe-boxes.

I mean, NOBODY LIVES THAT WAY, right? Maybe some boring rich people do, but damn… I mean, I try to clean and stay organized… and it helps, but I also try not to get to hung up on it.

Tell us something about your daily routine, how is your day structured, how do you make room for creativity?

**LOUD SUCKING SOUND THROUGH TEETH** I don't… at least, not very well at all… but I’m working on that.

I am not the person you should ask this question, because THIS RIGHT HERE is the BANE of my existence…

Share a quick producing tip.

MAN, I’ve already dropped like… seven, but okay, here goes:

BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY, FINISH THE TRACK. For me, this means ghetto-rigging, DIY, using the same goddamn audio interface from 2002 for f****ng fifteen YEARS… (recently fixed) don’t get hung up on “proper” ways, or ways that are outside your current means. Also, get a set of decent monitors… or use several pairs of headphones/speakers to double check mixes.

Recently, I’ve had less time, but a little bit of money, which is the opposite of how I’ve ALWAYS operated… it’s been difficult to unlearn “time consuming but cheap”. Also difficult not to impulse buy synths.

Making music with just a mouse and keyboard may be the least sexy thing ever… it works tho… cheap MIDI controllers CAN work faster however.

Share a link to an interesting website (doesn’t have to be music related).

My son just showed me this ➜ https://dddance.party/ and I have to say, this is an outstanding achievement of mankind.

List ten sounds you are hearing right this moment : )

Traffic outside my window, gentle hum of laptop cooling fan, dog snoring, fingers typing, birds chirping… that’s it.

John has a lo-fi house EP out on UltraBold Records as DJ CYBERDAD. It’s called ‘Emotional in Destin’. Stream it ➜ here, audio cassettes are available ➜ here.

Thanks John! If you want to get featured next, send a message here on tumblr or email [email protected].

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current-mcr-news · 6 years ago

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Off The Seton Path with Frank Iero: Full Transcription

Listen to the full podcast HERE

Brendon: Are you rolling?

Seton: Am I? I am! Yeah. Hey, Brendon, what's up?

B: Hi, Seton, how are you?

S: Great, great. And to you listening, welcome to Off The Seton Path. This is a podcast-

B: It is a podcast and it is 2019.

S: -that you've downloaded. Yeah, is this the first one of 2019?

B: This is the first one of 2019.

S: Yeah. How about that? And it's a good one. This is a banger, as they say.

B: This is definitely a banger. We don't even have to talk during this one. Well, you talk during this one, a whole lot.

S: Yeah. Yeah, I do talk, probably too much.

B: Well.

S: But that's-

B: I'll leave that up to the viewer.

S: Yeah, or listener, in this medium.

B: Your perspective.

S: Yeah. We have a really great interview here. Well, I think it's great because he was awesome. Frank Iero, he was in the band- he was the guitar player for My Chemical Romance, and then he's got other side projects, like Leathermouth was one, which was a really cool band, you should check them out. Frank Iero and the Patience, and there's a couple of other iterations of that band, of his solo stuff, but he is a really nice guy. Super cool guy. I met him last summer, actually, at a concert, and he was awesome. He was just a super nice guy, and I figured why not give him a call, see if he'd do an interview. He drove into New York City, which was really thoughtful of him. And- well, I don't know if it was thoughtful, but he drove into New York City from New Jersey, which was awesome, and we sat down at a place called The Ear Inn, which is-

B: Haunted.

S: -one of the oldest bars in New York City, and it's also supposed to be super haunted, which I thought, "How perfect for a guy like Frank Iero, who seems to be into that kind of that thing. He's got that sort of dark thing going on."

B: Black Parade, right?

S: Yeah, that was-

B: That's all there. I thought he was a wicked cool dude. First thing he did when we got in there, he was like, "I'm gonna go get a beer." And I have a camera on my shoulder, he's like, "Hey, do you want a beer?" And I was like, "Alright, this guy's good."

S: Yeah, he gets it.

B: This guy's good people.

S: Yeah. So anyway, I won't talk too much more about that, and I'll just let you get to the interview, but we do get into all of his solo stuff. He's got a podcast now that I think he's pretty pumped about. We talk a lot about ghosts, and we get into some stuff with My Chemical Romance, including the possibility of a reunion... I'm just gonna leave it out there. We do talk about that, despite the fact that I don't really think Frank wanted to.

B: Nope. You did the classic good interview. You were like, "I gotta ask."

S: Yeah. "I gotta ask you about this." So, he was gracious enough to let me ask that question, but anyway, enough talking. Here is an interview with Frank Iero. Enjoy.

S: Alright. So, I chose The Ear Inn to do this because it was built in the 18th century. Supposed to be super haunted, is what I hear.

Frank: I heard that there would be drinks and ghosts, and I was- you had me at both of those.

S: Right, yeah, those are- and actually the ghost, okay, so this place is supposed to be haunted by a ghost named Mickey. He was a drunken sailor-

F: Really?

S: Which, if you're gonna be haunted by somebody, it might as well be a drunken sailor.

F: See, I had questions about this. Like, ghosts- do they follow the same life that they had? Like, if you were drunk in life, do you stay drunk as a ghost? Or do you like, are you constantly looking for your next drink? Are you upset that you can't have one?

S: Well, so the legend has it that he- there's two ways that they think Mickey might've died. Either he drank himself to death sitting in one of these stools. Or he was hammered, walked outside, and got hit by a car.

F: Oh.

S: Either way, he supposedly- what happens to people here is they get their drink and sit down at the table, and by the time they get down at the table, their drink is gone.

F: No!

S: So, he'll drink your beer or whatever you're drinking.

F: What a shitty ghost! Sorry, I can't say that, right?

S: No, that's alright. You're okay. But yeah, the other thing they say, too, is that there's apartments up here, and occasionally, Mickey climbs into bed with some people, which is awkward.

F: Whoa.

S: I'd rather have him drink my beer, because if I'm sleeping, I don't wanna be disturbed.

F: Right, yeah. Is that how the statement "slipping a mickey," is that how that came about?

S: I don't know, it could be.

F: Alright.

S: That's wild.

F: That's strange.

S: So, you believe in ghosts? Or do you, I should say?

F: I would love to. I want so bad to believe in ghosts, or just the fact that there's something else. You know? I think that's what's so appealing about that, is that if there are ghosts involved in our lives, then that means that this isn't the only thing, you know? That there is something other than just darkness at the end of it.

S: So, I have a theory.

F: Go ahead.

S: This is what actually made me believe in ghosts, officially, 100%.

F: Okay, please.

S: A dog whistle.

F: Okay.

S: So, you know a dog whistle, right? You blow on it, and your dogs can hear it, but humans can't detect it because it's at a different frequency that, you know, our ears, for the most part, aren't picking it up, but for them, it's super loud. So, that got me thinking of the sounds out there that are happening that I can't hear because they're just at a different frequency. Why wouldn't there be other beings around that my senses just aren't picking up?

F: Different planes.

S: But for other people, or for other beings like dogs, they always say dogs can see ghosts.

F: Right.

S: I think dogs really have- are the answer.

F: You think that's the tie?

S: I do.

F: Alright. So, do you think all ghosts talk in a really high voice? That's the issue?

S: It's possible. It's possible. Yeah.

F: Maybe that's the- I don't know. Here's my question, right. Is that- where do you draw the line? Like, who gets to be a ghost, and why? And if everyone gets to be a ghost, then it has to be so crowded in that ethereal plane, you know? And then also, like, if that's happening, then there's gotta be ghosts that other ghosts really don't like, and they have to like- there's probably like gangs of ghosts, that are fighting.

S: There might be some kind of turf?

F: I would think, yeah.

S: Whereas, now, Mickey doesn't sound like all that tough of a guy. Why does he get to own The Ear Inn?

F: Yeah, like, that's the thing. He can't be the only one that died in the vicinity of The Ear Inn.

S: There was another place around the corner called The Death House that I thought was-

F: Oh, well, that sounds so much more badass.

S: That sounds really interesting, but I feel like I don't wanna put myself in those situations. I've never done a Ouija board.

F: I've done that.

S: Have you?

F: I've done that at a haunted hotel.

S: Get outta here!

F: Yeah.

S: What happened?

F: Well, I think somebody was pushing it.

S: You do?

F: Yeah. I think in order for those things to work, you have to do it with an asshole. Like, that's the only way it's really gonna be any fun, is like, somebody's gotta-

S: Like, "You be the guy."

F: Yeah, you have to, you know?

S: So, you're a skeptic?

F: I don't know if I'm so much a skeptic. It's just that I feel like a lot of things are easily explained, and that's unfortunate, you know what I mean? I wish that it was like, "Oh my god! The beer's not here anymore!" It's like, well, either somebody drank it or it spilled out.

S: Like, maybe a bartender messed with somebody or something.

F: I would be upset, though, if this wasn't' there anymore, so I get that.

S: I have had a history of thinking that I had a full beer, and then it was gone, and being like, "Well, that was weird. How did that happen?"

F: That's happened, yes. I have been haunted in the past.

S: "Better get another one." Apparently, I'm being haunted in bars all over the country.

F: Exactly. That was the interesting thing to me was like, we're going to a haunted bar. I was like, "Wow, usually I'm just haunted by the mistakes I've made being at a bar. Whereas, an actual spirit is going to come, like, that's where I wanna be."

S: Right, yeah. Like, "This is not my mistakes here."

F: Right, yeah yeah.

S: "That is causing me all this awful guilt." When you are travelling on the road, do you get to be a tourist? Or is it too busy?

F: I try to. I feel like in my younger days, I didn't. I really despised the travel so much that I let it affect how I toured, and it was like, "Oh no, I'm just gonna- just to the shows, and I don't even wanna see anything else. I don't wanna be here." And nowadays, I love going to new places that I've never been before, or even places that I've been a hundred times, but I haven't seen everything. I feel like, maybe I'm a little bit more relaxed in that setting of being a tourist. Of being out and experiencing things and not letting it, kind of, affect my show later on. I feel like it actually enhances the show later on, so, I'm into it if I have the time. But that's the hard part, man. Like, when you're on tour, the one thing you have is a lot of time, but it's a lot of hurry up and wait, you know? So, you're kind of on someone else's schedule at all times. You know? Waiting for soundchecks, or doing press, or you know, whatever it may be.

S: So, you've been in- you've played massive places like, you know, Reading and Leeds, headlined that, which is crazy. Brian May comes out, like, oh my god! And then you played, you know, you started small.

F: Played places like The Ear Inn.

S: You played places like here, too. Is it just as busy either- the bigger the venue, the more busy you get?

F: It is. It's kinda the same, you know? It depends. Festivals are just always hectic, and there's an added sense of dread, I feel like, with a festival, because you're dealing with a lot of- no soundcheck, getting up on the stage where a sound guy or monitor guy, just doesn't wanna deal with your shit. Basically, he's like, "I've done this 16 times today, I'm gonna do it 60 times more, and I have a whole weekend of it. Just get up there and play it." So, that's a little rough. Things are usually broken by the time you get up there and play, and those kinds of pitfalls. But you know, regular venue type stuff, like, it has its own issues, you know? But, yeah, the stress is always there, and there's something- will always go wrong that will be a constant succubus of time.

S: Yeah, right right. I saw Jawbreaker in Chicago for Riot Fest, and as soon as they come out, they opened it with Boxcar, which is like the song everybody knows. The place goes bonkers. And Blake, the lead singer and guitar player, steps on his pedal, and it doesn't work. It's like, "This is our big return in front of this massive audience," and he was like- you could see him looking over at the bass player like, "Isn't this so typically us?"

F: That's typically everybody. Yeah, it has to go like that, you know? And it's not a matter of will it happen? It's just a matter of when. When's it gonna go wrong?

S: It's more about how you react to it happening, because you know it's gonna happen.

F: Yeah, you'd like to think that no one else knows, but everybody knows. You know what I mean? Everybody knows that it's happening.

S: You're like, "Oh, dear."

F: There's definitely been times where, like- and it's usually when you plan out this huge entrance into something, or like, you know, like, "Oh, we're really gonna psyche the crowd up by like- we're gonna have the curtains open and we're gonna go 1 2 3 and right into it!" And that's when the kick drum pedal will break, or something of that nature. You count into silence, basically. It's like, "Alright." Takes you down a couple of notches.

S: When we talk about, in sports, we talk a lot about places like Fenway Park, and the ghosts of the people that have played there before, like Babe Ruth played there, and all these- Ted Williams and all that. When you play a venue, a famous venue, do you feel that? It might not be ghosts, necessarily, but that sense of history of, "Whoa, we're playing this place right now."

F: There's definitely, yeah. There's definitely moments like that. It's funny. I recently went to go see the Queen movie, right? And for the first half, I was like, "This is a dramatization, I don't know if I like this," and then the last 20 minutes are basically centralized around their triumphant show at Live Aid at Wembley Stadium.

S: Yeah, iconic performance.

F: Iconic, yeah. And I feel like, you don't really get to see that a lot in like, you know, movies about music, or musicians, where they really- you go through every song. Like, 5, 6 songs, 20 minutes of them performing or lip syncing, rather, you know, performing this. Like, that's crazy. And I started to think to myself, I've had shows where I've played them and been like, "This is a show I'm going to remember for the rest of my life." And you're like, "Wow, that's really awesome." But I've also played Wembley Stadium opening up for Muse one time, and I remember thinking to myself, "This isn't going well."

S: Oh no.

F: So, I got to watch that movie with people playing that venue with a triumphant gig, and you're like, "Oh, I know what that's like, but not there." So, I just hope that my movie doesn't end with my set there. Hopefully, it's somewhere else.

S: You know, you don't think- you just think of being in the moment and then- how do you get a sense of when a show is going the wrong way?

F: Oh, you know.

S: Just the crowd, or is it you, or is it-?

F: Depends on the instance, you know what I mean? I've definitely had some moments where I'm like, "Oh man, this might be the last time anyone ever lets me get up the stage." You know what I mean? So, those where everything you tried just goes wrong, that's never fun. I feel like, the music business or the music industry is rough, because you can go to school, you can go to college, you can get a degree, and you can- say you pass the bar, you'll be a lawyer. Unless you do something really fucked up, you're always gonna be a lawyer, nobody's gonna take that away from you. But as a musician or as an artist, you're only as good as the last thing that you did. You can make, you know, a beautiful piece of art, or like 3 records that are great, but if your last record sucks, or the last couple of shows suck, people are gonna be like, "That guy's a has-been." You know what I mean? So, it's kinda rough. You're always trying to keep that bar high, and that's why when you have a really bad show, you start to really beat yourself up.

S: You're like, "When's the next time I'm gonna be in this city to make this right? When's the next time I'm gonna be in Boston, because I gotta-"

F: "Can't wait for no one to show up."

S: Yeah. All of the sudden, your merch sales just dipped.

F: There you go.

S: "Great, blew it."

F: That's, I think, part of- you don't get into this business because you're confident. Like, you get into this business because you hate yourself on such a pure level, you want something that you can beat yourself up with every night.

S: You need to punish yourself onstage, nightly.

F: Oh definitely. It's like a flogging. It's a lot like drunk Mickey.

S: Yes, right. Yeah. And occasionally, we all go down that same way, you know. Aside from the haunted hotel Ouija board, what's the scariest place you've been? Is there a place that's been super creepy that you're like, "Dang, I don't know if I'm cool with this?"

F: That's a really good question. Especially in My Chem, we would search those types of places out, like, "We've heard this hotel is haunted, or we've heard that this venue is haunted," we'd wanna take a tour. And there was one night where- there's a venue in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. The Eagle Ballroom, or the Aragon- I think it's called The Eagle Ballroom. Actually, where it's located is- the venue is here, and it's down the block from the McDonald's where Jeffrey Dahmer used to pick up all his victims. So, it's already got a weird feeling around it. And deep down in the bowels of that venue, there's an old sports club. There's a huge Olympic sized swimming pool, and locker rooms, and all these different things. And so, we would take tours of it, and I remember one time in particular. I've been there a couple of times. One time in particular, after the show, it was late, and they had this, you know, like shower rooms, and backstage rooms down there. And I went to- I was gonna go take a shower and then go back to the bus after the night was over. And I remember hearing, not a commotion, like, what sounded to me like kids running around, laughing, and just like, you know, doing whatever. And I thought to myself, "Alright well, must be cleaning crew or something, brought their kids." Something is weird. And so, like, looked outside, didn't see anybody. And where that shower room is, is next to the Olympic swimming pool that's now closed, and you can kinda go underneath it and check things out, it's really creepy. But I've never seen anything there. And so, looked out there, was nothing. I was like, "This is weird." I ended up taking a shower, blah blah, you know, heard chattering one more time, but couldn't find anybody. Later on, went back to the bus, like, "Yeah, I keep hearing like, kids or something." They're like- you know, I spoke to somebody at the venue, and they said nobody was ever- no kids were there, but in that swimming pool, there was a drowning at one time. So, I don't know. I just got chills all of a sudden, while I was saying that.

S: Yeah, dude, that's what I'm saying! A draft just blew in or something.

F: It's weird, but then again, I don't know, maybe it was a high pitched cleaning crew.

S: You don't know, you have no idea. That's super creepy.

F: It's weird.

S: But there's something great about being scared in that thrilling way. Not scared in a real life or death way, but in a like, "Whoa, what's- this is kinda weird." There's something about that rush.

F: It's unsettling, yeah. I do enjoy that. I really enjoyed it until my children got old enough to realize that scaring people is funny. And my daughters, especially my daughter Cherry, she's 8 years old now, but she loves to scare people. And she'll like hide behind doors and jump out at you, and I'm now at an age where I think I might have a heart attack at some point. Now, I really hate it.

S: "I've survived rock and roll, I need to survive my 8 year olds."

F: Survived the troupe of ghost children at The Eagle Ballroom, now I come home and die trying to put you to bed.

S: The kids are at an age where Halloween is like, prime time. I know in my house, with my son, it's like Halloween is a big deal.

F: They love it, yeah.

S: Do you go big?

F: I do. It's actually my birthday, too.

S: Oh, no kidding.

F: Yeah, so.

S: Oh, cool.

F: That's my favorite holiday, and my kids have actually now adopted it as their favorite holiday, too. I keep saying, "Isn't it so much better than Christmas? Especially when you get Dad something really good for it?"

S: "Everybody dresses up for my birthday, that's how good this is."

F: Exactly, we all celebrate. But yeah, no, it's a big deal at our house.

S: Do you have a best costume?

F: I mean, I'm not trying to brag, but I'm pretty good at the costuming. I've perfected it over the years. I had a slump when I was young, about 3 or 4 years where I was just Freddy Krueger. I had the same costume for 3 or 4 years. And then, somebody woke me up a bit, and then I started to get a little bit more inventive with things. This past year, I actually had a working birthday. I had a working holiday, so I did have a costume in mind, but I didn't get to dress up, which was really depressing for me. But last year, I was Don Mattingly, and I really pulled it off, really well. I was Donnie Baseball. And the year before that I was Sadness.

S: Do you go 'stache?

F: No, I didn't. I did 'stache, and then I did the party in the back.

S: Yeah, great, that's awesome. Donnie Baseball is a legend.

F: Yes, absolutely. Especially around here.

S: Oh yeah, you're right in it for sure. Did you record an album in a mansion in LA?

F: Yes, kind of.

S: It sounds creepy as hell to me.

F: Yes, it was. That actually was supposedly haunted as well. I heard things- alright, so, I'll move backwards. So, what we did was we lived in, and wrote the record, in the Paramour House in LA. It's up in the hills somewhere. And it's basically, yeah, like a haunted mansion. We did some recordings there, but none that made it to the actual record. The record that we were making at the time was called The Black Parade. Where I lived was, there was the main house, was say like, kinda long like this way, and then there was a pool outside, and there was, like, a spire that you kinda do like a circular stairway up to, and that's where I stayed. In that room-

S: Which isn't creepy. Not at all. "I slept up here in this perched thing."

F: I was perched in the spire!

S: You're like, "That's the one I want."

F: Yeah, exactly. I guess, yeah, I was really looking for an experience, you know. But the story goes that Merle Haggard stayed in that room at some point, and met, what he claimed to be, a ghost. And it was a lady ghost, and apparently he wrote- whenever he wrote songs up in that room, in the spire room, she would come and visit him and they would harmonies together. And so, that was my room. I never saw anybody, but I did hear things in the walls, which I kind of assumed were raccoons. But maybe it was lady raccoons that had a really good voice. I don't know!

S: There could be a lot of things creaking, or I don't know.

F: Could've been Merle. I don't know!

S: Right, right. Which could explain why the record did so well, too, I mean, you've got other forces getting in.

F: This is possible. There were a lot of forces. See, I was not the only one that had an experience though, in that house. I know Mikey and Gerard- Mikey had a room that he refused to sleep in, and he actually ended up sleeping on Gerard's floor for a long time. We were in that house for months, and no one really had a great time. I don't know.

S: That's awesome.

F: Yeah. It was a cool experience, though.

S: That feels like a whole other different- I mean, things happened for My Chem pretty quickly, it seems like. In the span of a few years, it went from like, 0 to 100.

F: Yeah, and in the very beginning it was pretty- yeah.

S: That's a lot different than, like-

F: Pretty intense.

S: -getting some studio time and going to cut an album as quick as you can, versus, "Alright, we're gonna take up this house."

F: Yeah, well-

S: "Move in all of our equipment."

F: Not to sound like an old fuddy-duddy, but like, times were different back then. The budgets were- you were able to have those months to kinda sit in a haunted house and write. And I'm glad- I feel like that was the tail end of that in the music industry, and we were very happy to be a part of it.

S: Oh yeah, you caught that tail end there. "Let's just blow it out!"

F: When we were kids, Metallica was holed up in, what I imagine was like, pool cabanas, for years, you know what I mean? Writing records and stuff like that. So, yeah, we caught the tail tail end. We got a haunted house for a couple months.

S: How do you know when a song is done, when you're writing it?

F: A better person than I can be quoted as saying, "You don't ever finish a record, you just relent." You have to kinda just be like, "I have to let go." You know what I mean? "There's nothing more I can do that will make this better, I'm just going to make it worse." And I feel like that's, you know, a lot of art. There's- you can always do more. Should you do more? Probably not, you know? But then again, there's some songs where it just needs to be just a very succinct, you know, the simpler the better. But it's hard to see the forest for the trees sometimes.

S: Yeah, that makes sense. What about the difference between writing- I mean, I'm assuming you just sort of always write, but writing for yourself, and then versus writing with a band. Is there one you prefer? I'm sure they're both great in their own ways but-

F: Yeah, they're so different. That's the thing. I've always been a fan of that collaborative effort. I like that when you're in a band of friends, people that you respect musically, of course, but also that you get along with, it's fun to try to impress each other, and be like, "Look at this thing I came up with!" That inspires someone else with something else, and then we just kind of make this crazy Scooby sandwich out of it. It just kind of layers up, you know? And that's really fun. The thing about writing for yourself and just as a solo artist, is that there's a sense of accomplishment because nothing makes the record that you didn't come up with on your own. You know what I mean? If it didn't come from your head or your heart, it's not there. And the other great thing about it is that sometimes, certain ideas take a little while to flesh out, and if you can't immediately make someone else see the potential in something, it's able to be kind of bulldozed over, if you're working with a bunch of different writers, you know. They'll be like, "Oh well, that's not working. We'll get back to it," you never really get back to it. But if you write something, even if it sucks, but you see potential in it, you can chase that to the end of the year, and that's really cool.

S: Yeah, that's gotta be a very, sort of, I don't know if it's democratic, or just the idea of working with people and delicately, "I don't know if I'm feeling that." Which I'm sure-

F: It's hard, man. I've been in both situations where somebody was like, "Yo, that fucking sucks. And I don't like your face."

S: "Alright, that was kinda rough. Maybe we've been in this mansion too long."

F: Possibly. But I've also been in situations where people are really kind about it, but even when they're so kind, you still feel like a piece of shit when someone doesn't like what you wrote. It's hard, you know. I feel like, the older you get, maybe, the more able you are to deal with that type of rejection. Be like, "Oh well, I'll get 'em next time," or like, "Oh, I'm gonna take that home, I'm gonna really work on it really hard, and bring it back, and they're gonna understand later on." But part of you also is like, "Fuck that guy!"

S: "Screw you, dude. Fucking fine, I'll save it for my own shit."

F: Exactly, yeah.

S: How do you know, too, when a song- if you're writing, how do you know if this is just for me, or this is for them, this is for- this feels more like a Leathermouth song? I mean, granted, there's obviously huge differences in the music that you're making there, but-

F: You know, sometimes it just speaks to you on a level. It depends, too, I feel like, if you're writing lyrics to it, could you see yourself kinda handing those over, and letting someone else emote with those emotions? Would it feel contrived if somebody else sang your words? You know? Or if you're like, "I just had music here, I don't know what to do," you know, vocally, or something like that. That's a good one to pass off. But usually for me, I kinda jump from project to project, and I think I start- I write within that project. I don't ever write a song like, "I'm gonna hold onto this because this is gonna be good for that one."

S: This is what you're focused on, so this is sort of where your head space is.

F: Yeah. And if I hit a block within that project, I move to the next project, and I start writing there. So, I'm not ever just writing in a broad stroke where I'm like, "This could be for this, this could be for this." It's always like, "Alright, I'm focusing on this one, or I'm focusing on this one."

S: Yeah. So, new projects. You're used to the music world, but you're dipping your toes into a whole new venture.

F: Yeah.

S: Of podcasting.

F: Podcasting. It's strange to me. I was like, I didn't know really what a podcast was for a very long time. I was like, "It's people just talking into a recorder? Alright."

S: Yeah, you just kinda sit and talk for a little while and then say, "Here you go."

F: That's it, yeah! I was like, "Why do people listen to that?" You know? And then I actually started to listen to them, and I was like, "Oh alright, I get it now." And it just so happens that a few of my friends, my friend John Hambone and my friend Shaun Simon, who were in a band I did very early on in my career called Pencey Prep, we just were looking for an excuse, I guess, to hang out and talk. And we, like, well, we go to lunch every couple of weeks and bullshit, and if we were to record this, I think people would get a little bit more insight into other things. And Shaun, of course, from music stuff, branched out and he started writing comics, he ended up writing The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys with Gerard, he wrote Art Ops, and he's working on something new called Wizard Beach, but he brings in kind of a different realm to the podcast. We could talk until we're blue in the face about writing music and touring, and stuff like that, but I feel like his venture into writing comics and actually starting to write prose and stuff like that, and trying to write a novel, is a fun conversation to have about, you know like, creativity, and inspiration, things like that. So, we've been having a really good time. The first two episodes are out, the third episode is coming out in a couple of days. It's called Casual Interactions, and it's one of my favorite projects I've ever worked on because it's just so much fun.

S: Yeah, well you need- especially when you get older and you have kids, and responsibilities, it's hard to figure out time to hang with your buddies.

F: It is! It really is.

S: But now when you make it work, you know like, work.

F: That's my advice. I feel like if you wanna hang out with your friends and drink, turn a recorder on and then you can tell your wife you're working.

S: "It's been a week! We got a podcast we gotta get out!"

F: "It's work, I have to!"

S: "I have to do this right now!"

F: Yes, yeah.

S: She's like, "Yeah, but at 8:30 on Friday night or whatever, at the bar?" Like, "Yes!"

F: There you go. Right now, if there wasn't a camera on us, we'd be fucked off. "Oh, I'm going to a haunted bar with my friend Seton and have some beers."

S: This is exactly what I've- so, we me and Brendon are sitting at a bar in Houston, right? Houston?

B: Yeah.

S: And we're just drinking and trying to figure out a show to do, or whatever, and getting kind of in our cups a little bit, and, "Well, I really like interviewing bands in bars," and then we're like, "What if we made a travel show out of it and just did-" Like, because you guys were saying you travel all over the place.

F: Yeah.

S: James from Against Me!, anytime I'm going to a new city, I'll throw out on Twitter or whatever like, "Hey, what's the best place, a bar, in Minneapolis," or whatever, and he's got 17.

F: He definitely knows. Oh my god.

S: He's got 70 of like, "Oh, make sure you get the burger here, and the burrito there," or something, you know, he's all over the place with it. I'm like, "God, you guys are just a limitless fountain of knowledge for travel!"

F: See, Bowman's a bad influence for me, though, because when he sends me stuff, it's like music stores I have to go, or record stores, and it's like, "Man, just kill my bank account."

S: "How am I shipping this new stack back to my house?"

F: Yeah.

S: Yeah, and actually, on the way down, I nerded out a little bit on your guitar rig.

F: Oh, really?

S: Yeah. You know that equip board, there's like a website.

F: Oh okay, alright.

S: That, I think it's all unofficial, but they'll do- it's got everybody's. And like, so you're on there, and it's got all of the guitars that you've been seen using, pedals, and sometimes it's just a random picture from a fan on the stage, and it's like, "I think that's-"

F: I love that.

S: "-a Big Muff," or whatever, you know, I don't think you use one of those, but Swollen Pickle.

F: Yes! I do use a Swollen Pickle.

S: Yeah yeah yeah.

F: I've actually passed that along, though, to my brother-in-law, who uses it in the band. He plays guitar in my solo project, so he uses that a lot, and I actually ended up getting an older, like 70s, Tall Font Big Muff, that I've been using, and I actually finished a record 3 weeks ago, and it's on there a bunch. So, I'm pretty excited about that.

S: Yeah, right on. I can get in that stuff. I'll just spend all day on the internet looking at freaking pedals and stuff. Like, I don't even- I mean, I play, but I don't ever play out. It's just in my home, you know?

F: That's fine.

S: And my wife is like, "Man, that's a lot of pedals for a dude who doesn't even record music." And I'm like, "Yeah, but-"

F: "That's my tone, honey!"

S: "You get these sounds!" Yeah, I'm like, "Babe, I'm trying to find my tone." Yeah.

F: "That's why I haven't played out yet, I haven't found the right tone! You're interrupting me!"

S: Yeah, I'm like, "I'm writing songs, I'm creating in here! Just leave me alone." Yeah. But you can get lost in that stuff.

F: Oh, definitely. Definitely. And that's the thing too, is like, you know, each one is different, man. They're all like snowflakes, dude. Like, "Oh yeah, this is a distorter but this is a fuzz, and this is an overdrive and this is a preamp."

S: Yeah, and then dialing each one in when you plug in another.

F: Oh man, and then you switch the order!

S: Oh my gosh, you switch the order and it's a whole new world.

F: Yeah, definitely.

S: No, it's crazy. We just moved about 4 years ago, we moved in to a new house, and it was built in 1880.

F: Oh.

S: So, in New England, everything's old. A lot of stuff is really old. And so, we got one room that I can sorta, I call it the music room, where it's set up. I got my guitars in there, amps, all that stuff, it's cool. But when we were- that was one of the main selling points of the house for me, was like, "Oh, I'd have space to just sorta do this." Not that I need it, necessarily, but it's nice to have it. So, we're closing on the house, and the real estate agent is like, "Alright, cool, so, inspection was good," running through all of that stuff, "The playscape is gonna stay, you know about the garage, it needs to be fixed, there's some stuff upstairs they need to take out, and of course you know about the dollhouse." And we're like, "Uh, no? What dollhouse?" And they're like, "The dollhouse in your basement." I'm like, "What dollhouse in the basement?" She's like, "You didn't notice the-" I'm like, "No!" She's like, "Oh, well, for the last 5 owners, this dollhouse has been in the basement and it sort of comes in the house, it stays in there. No one's ever removed it." I was like, "Nope. Forget it, I don't want the house. Forget it." That's- now, there's nothing inherently weird about a dollhouse

F: Oh, yes there is!

S: But when they say it like that.

F: Oh yeah.

S: Like, "Oh, and of course, you know about the dollhouse, right?" "No, what dollhouse?"

F: That's a deal ender right there.

S: Yeah.

F: Fuck, god.

S: Like get the- so, then, I started developing this whole theory that what happens is, if you do something in the house, or somehow disrespect it or something, or get on the bad side of whatever spirits are living there, you're shrunken down into a miniature person.

F: And then you live in the dollhouse, yeah.

S: You're doomed to live in the dollhouse for eternity.

F: Oh man. You know what movie really freaked me out as a kid? It was Cat's Eye, with that little elf guy who, kinda like, goes in their room and he has that little knife, and he tries to steal the breath of the little kids? But I feel like if you live in a dollhouse, like, that you probably have to steal child breath.

S: I feel like I've seen the cover of that VHS tape.

F: Oh, it's so fucked up, dude.

S: Yeah. Is that your favorite horror movie? Are you a horror movie guy?

F: I do like them. I do. I wouldn't say connoisseur. I would say kinda? But that- here's the thing. I really bonded with my dad. Of course, my dad was a drummer, so we bonded over music. But the other thing that we bonded over was horror movies. So, like, you know, Vincent Price and stuff like that, and then I kinda convinced him to show me other stuff that I wasn't' supposed to see yet, and we would just, on the weekends, we would just watch horror movies constantly, and listen to records. So, yeah, that's- yeah. I remember, but like, certain ones leave that impression on you, you know.

S: Definitely. Some of them just leave the impression because they're weird, some are gory, some just scare the shit out of you.

F: Yeah. What's your favorite? If you have one.

S: Well, you know, as a kid, I really- it's kind of basic to say but Halloween really scared me, actually.

F: Okay, yeah.

S: Just because there was something about the face, and you know what? It really does, truly-

F: Shatner, man. He's terrifying.

S: -terrify me. Yeah, he was a scary dude. Random acts of violence really scare me. You know? Like, that's something that actually- that movie, The Strangers?

F: Oh, yes! I love that movie. I won't go see the second one.

S: No!

F: Because I think they ruined it. But that movie is terrifying.

S: I got into- I got about 20 minutes into that movie and I looked at my wife, and I said, "I think we just made a huge mistake. I don't think that we should be watching this." Because it just, there's something about- they're sitting there, there's this young couple, they're working out, "Should we stay together, should we not?" and the whole time, there's these people in the room with them, and they have no idea.

F: No idea, yeah.

S: Holy sh-. That's scary!

F: I saw that movie in theaters, right. It was like, a midnight showing, right, because I wanted to see it really bad. The night it was coming out, was maybe a Thursday night, or something like that. So, we went to the midnight showing, me and my wife and a friend of ours, and we're in there, and all of a sudden this lady rolls in a baby carriage, and sits down in the front row, and it's packed. I mean, it's packed. I'm like, "That's really, kinda weird. Odd, but whatever." So, the movie starts, and all of a sudden the baby wakes up, and is terrified and it's like, "It's fucking midnight! Why am I here?" And so, the baby starts screaming, and everybody's like, "Yo, what are you doing here?" And she stands up and goes, "Deal with it!" And so, the guy behind me goes, "Put yo titty in its mouth!" And it was the greatest thing I've ever heard at a movie in my entire life. It was, actually, almost better than the movie.

S: You never get that experience-

F: You never get that experience ever again.

S: "Put your titty in its mouth."

F: "Put your titty in its mouth!" I mean, could've worked, I don't know.

S: That's great. And that's The Strangers.

F: That was The Strangers, yeah.

S: That's what you took away from that movie.

F: That baby, yeah. Yeah.

S: Wow, that's great. That's a serious experience. That's what you get at a midnight showing of a horror movie.

F: That's true. This is true.

S: You know? Yeah. So, let's see. You have a podcast coming out. What else is going on now? You did Frank Iero and the Patience was last year. You released something last year but the- two years ago was your last album.

F: Yeah, so, two years ago was the last full length, and then we did an EP last year, finished recording the new record, like I said about, 3 weeks ago, and that will be out, I believe- we haven't announced it yet, so I'm thinking it's-

S: Is this news? Is this breaking news?

F: We're breaking news.

S: Is this an exclusive?

F: Yes. It might be wrong, though, I don't know.

S: You never know.

F: Maybe April or May, I think is what we're discussing right now.

S: Do you have to shop labels and all that?

F: It's strange. We're starting a new relationship with a new label, I'm pretty excited about it. But again, it's all new, and the papers should be signed this week, so I probably shouldn't say anything else. Unless Mickey has anything to do with it, I don't know.

S: So, about two years ago, I won't get into it too much, but I have to ask.

F: Yes yes yes.

S: Like, two years ago, anniversary of The Black Parade.

F: Oh!

S: Everybody kinda went bonkers thinking about a reunion. Right?

F: That did happen. Here's the thing. Well, was it two years ago?

S: Well, it would've been 2006, did that come out?

F: Right. Okay, oh, it's 2018, yeah you're right. 2016.

S: So, it was like two years ago, ish.

F: So, what happened was, we wanted to do a 10 year anniversary release of it. And we had some demos left over, and songs that didn't make the record, and we're like, "Oh cool, we'll put it all together, and-" Every year, we meet and we have a barbecue kinda thing, and we'll- that's like, we'll have the barbecue, the kids'll hang out, and then we'll discuss business for the next year, basically. And so, we're like, "That'd be really cool. We should do a little teaser trailer for it." And so, we said, "Alright, that's what we'll do." And we told the lady what we wanted, and they made this trailer, and released it, and all of a sudden we're like, "Oh wait... Everyone's real confused."

S: "We're just doing an anniversary release. Not a tour."

F: Yeah. And then we had to come out and be like, "Oh... That was- we were just excited but..."

S: "At the barbecue, it made a lot more sense."

F: Yeah!

S: "It was much more clear when defined at the barbecue."

F: "It was so much clearer then!" But here's the thing, we were always a theatrical band, so like, we wanted to continue in that fashion, but when you're not a band any longer, it's probably harder to do that. We didn't realize.

S: I'm always fascinated that there's business. Bands will say like, they breakup, or they're not together, they go on hiatus, whatever the right wording is. But they're still always business to be done. You'll read- I like reading music biographies, and it'll be like, "The worst breakup ever: Van Halen still has to get together once a year to sign papers." You know? And you're like, "Oh my god! That must be so crazy."

F: Especially if you hate each other. That's gotta be really awkward.

S: Oh, it's gotta be super weird. So, well, 2020 is coming up.

F: Uh huh.

S: That would be another anniversary for you guys.

F: For what?

S: I don't know if you're- isn't Danger Days-

F: Was that 2010?

S: I think so.

F: Alright.

S: I think that's 2010. I'm just giving you the heads up.

F: Just another opportunity to disappoint people like that.

S: "Sorry." Is that, sort of, there's gotta be a blessing and a curse in that pressure on you guys.

F: Yeah.

S: Like, people want you to.

F: Right.

S: Which is really great and you have that option. But then they also expect you to, which is sort of like, "Eh, just... Let us figure this out."

F: Right. I imagine it's a lot like the holidays, you know, and you go to like, your family and they're like, "You should marry that Dennis. You should go back to school." And you're like, "Ah yeah, that's not really, you know, I'm doing- I got this thing happening." And they're like, "Yeah, but that was so nice when you- You could've been-"

S: "What about that nice thing?"

F: Yeah, exactly. The weird thing about it is, is that we all still get along really well. It's just that we're kinda focused on other aspects and other projects. And I feel like when the band- when we knew the band was over, we didn't wanna do the hiatus thing, because I feel like that leaves this weird open ended discussion of, "When is it gonna come back? When's it gonna come back?" And you'd just be hounded by that, and you can't really focus on anything else you're doing, because you're just going to be hounded by these questions of that. Little did we know, that we'd still have it. But we thought, like, "Alright, well, if we're going to end it, we're gonna put a bullet in its head and end it the way that we started it." You know, for all the right reasons. As far as, you know, it being- it's crazy to me that the band is almost bigger now than it ever was when we were doing it, you know? And I feel like that's really interesting, and really flattering that it's taken on a life of its own, and we've been passed on to younger generations. That's how I found out about bands, you know.

S: Sure, yeah.

F: You know, older siblings or older friends. They'd be like, "Listen to this tape, this is the real shit. You're listening to some stuff that you think is cool, but it's not. Like, listen to this." And that's rad, man. I love being in a band like that. It's strange to me when I'm touring currently on a project, and say you get a cover of a magazine for that project, and then two months later, you're on the cover of the same magazine as a legendary artist. I'm just like, "Oh shit, that's real weird."

S: "I didn't get that old yet."

F: Yeah!

S: "I can't be a legend!"

F: Eh, kind of.

S: "How could I be a legend?" You know what, man? That's what I love, though, about people-

F: Or- not legendary, I'm sorry, "classic artist."

S: Oh, a classic.

F: I don't want everyone to go- yeah.

S: When I first started in radio, one of my first jobs was at a classic rock station, and they were playing Nirvana and stuff like that, and I'm like, "Hold up. What?"

F: That's scary.

S: "How is that classic rock? It's been 10 years!"

F: It is, man.

S: That's it.

F: I know.

S: I love that there's people our age, because we're pretty close. I'm 40.

F: Okay. 37.

S: And so, we- a lot of times, my friends are like, "Dang, you still going to shows, or whatever, doing this?" And I'm like, "Yeah, but everybody that I'm going to see is my age."

F: Right, yeah.

S: You know?

F: Yeah, exactly.

S: It's not like, there's a lot of us that still- it's not let go, but it's just who you are in a way.

F: Yeah.

S: Now, I'm not a musician or anything like that, but I'm still so into all of the same things from when I was 16, somehow. I'm just in an adult about it now.

F: I hear you. It's strange to me too, like, a lot of those bands that we both grew up listening to are kinda having this resurgence, and new fans are coming in, and it's really awesome to see those bands get their just dues, you know?

S: And you're gonna be in that loop.

F: We'll see, I don't know. I mean, that's nuts. Here's the thing, you gotta think about this, right? The last show that the Misfits ever played, right? Not now, but-

S: Not the new.

F: Yeah. But like, when they were doing it, I mean, how many people did they play to? 800 maybe? Like, that was a lot. I know they played Irving Plaza at some point. So, the cap on that now is like, 11, but back then, I think it was less. Let's say 1,000 people. That's huge numbers for punk rock, right? I know about punk rock, that's crazy.

S: Yeah.

F: What did they get paid for it? I don't know, I mean, could they have gotten 5 grand? That's a lot, that'd be a lot back then. Now, they're headlining Prudential Center.

S: The Prudential Center.

F: What the fuck?! That's crazy!

S: And they'll only do it for a minimum.

F: A minimum! Like- My god.

B: That was a ride.

S: Wow, that was a rollercoaster ride of-

B: Talk about something.

S: He's a cool dude, man.

B: He's funny, too.

S: What a really nice guy.

B: He seems like a prankster. You know what I mean? He seems like he would be a guy that would be fun at a party.

S: Oh, yeah. Yeah. I think he had a pretty good time. I think he had a pretty good time. And you know, he- one of the things that I love about interviewing people now, especially bands like that, a lot of these guys are my age, and we're sort of all in this same stage of life where we're all married, we're all having kids, we all have families, but still go to shows and stuff.

B: Yeah, maintaining the other.

S: Yeah. And I love relating to people on that level, where Frank is talking about- we could both talk about taking out kids to soccer practice, and he's like, "Oh yeah, the other parents will drive you nuts," or something, you know. He's right in that same space, which is pretty cool. And that helps me whenever I start thinking to myself sometimes, where I'm like, "I don't know, I'm 40 years old, maybe I should move on." But I just can't, you know? It's just part of who you are, it's just part of your DNA, I think.

B: Yeah, just keep it in balance.

S: Yeah. Like, I'm not stage diving anymore. But I still like going to shows. I still like watching bands, and people like Frank Iero help me maintain that, and feel like, "Yes. See? It's not just me. I'm not always the old guy there. There's other people. They're all holding on." I love it.

B: I'll get there someday.

S: Yeah, you will. It happens.

#frank iero #off the seton path #dan patrick show

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ariianas · 6 years ago

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ˢʰᑫ ᶦᶰᵗᵉʳᵛᶦᵉʷ ﹔𝕒𝕣𝕚𝕒𝕟𝕒 𝕘𝕣𝕒𝕟𝕕𝕖 !

❝ so you are famously known for not only your grammy winning music, but also your ability to fall in and out of love. your boyfriend, shawn mendes, has abruptly abandoned your joint tour just as rumors surface of your ongoing relationship with 1d alumni, liam payne. what are you doing to keep yourself positive? and what exactly is going on with liam and shawn? ❞

❛ whew, okay, i should’ve known the hard-hitting questions were coming first. trying to get the hot scoop, man ? can’t blame you. but, uh, i do the same thing to stay positive during ... you know ... the million times a month when my life hits the fan. lots of comfort food, surrounding myself around these brilliant, amazing people i call friends n’ lay up with piggy n’ the gang. what else could a girl possibly ask for ? oh, i know, a suave answer to get my tiny ass out of this question. uh, literally days after my divorce with gregg was finalized, i ran into my little crumpet liam. we instantly hit it off, which had much to do with me droolin’ over his accent, mind you. then he ghosted for personal reasons, n’ a bitch wanted to hop on the first man she saw. lasted a good two days later, of course. shawn came along ‘n ruined everything ─── but in the best way possible. so, yeah. ❜

❝ consider the rumors about sofia carson are true. do you think you were inconsiderate of her feelings because your own marriage was wrecked due to another woman? ❞

❛ oh gosh, not a day goes by where i haven’t heard sofia’s name. can y’all leave the poor girl alone ? i don’t even know the girl, ‘n i’m feelin’ super bad for her right now. that’s rough. but, uh, do i think i was inconsiderate ? fuck yeah. are you not listening, dude ? as i said before, my main priority after leaving gregg was living as recklessly as i possibly could. and, well, uh, some may say that i took that a little too far. look, any inch of consideration that i felt instantly flew out the window once i really got to know who shawn was. which was, mind you, by like the second day of us speaking. n’ to clear that up, i never had the intention of stealing shawn away from her, or whatever they were at the time, but it just happened. i spruced up his life n’ he did the same for mine, simple. ❜

❝ your critics have stated that your music is becoming too generic. your song, 7 rings, blatantly copies the flow of another artist. what do you have to say to the people that are questioning your artistic integrity? and why are you so afraid to say you pulled inspiration from others? ❞

❛ this again ? i really want people to stop this whole ‘ she copied so n’ so, ’ or ‘ this sounds exactly like …. ’ bullshit cause music n’ beats are universal. literally every song, pop, at that, would sound the absolute same to anyone who isn’t all techy with production n’ all that jazz. plus, why would i be afraid to admit something so simple ? everyone has to start somewhere, man, n’ there’s no reason for me to shy away from that. you know ? it’s like adding fuel to the fire. no bueno, my friend. either fuckin’ way, man, 7 rings is a banger ─── buy n’ stream it, folks. mama needs to feed her dogs tonight ! ❜

❝ let’s talk about some of the other men in your life. for instance, joe keery, who infamously publicly defended your honor during the cheating scandal between camila and your ex husband, gregg. it seems you have a history with somewhat problematic behavior. do you think you’re manipulative? do you feel bad for what occurred between you and keery and how his tweets destroyed his friendship for many months? and don’t you get a sense of your actions repeating themselves? ❞

❛ y’all really made sure to hit all the bases here, huh ? the only interview that has done their research has me spilling out my guts. thanks guys ! but, uh, did he really come to my defense ? can someone pull up the tweet for the love of science ? i need visual proof cause now i’m feelin’ bad for tell him to buzz off the other day. joseph, if you’re seeing this then i’m sorry ! let’s be friends again ! now, to get down to the nitty gritty since i know this is the tea everyone’s looking for. am i manipulative ? of course i wouldn’t say that, but i will say that i’d stop at absolutely nothing to get what i want. so, if that’s your idea of manipulative then there’s your answer. as for joseph, i definitely feel bad. i mean, let me not act like ghostin’ him was easy cause watching his reaction when i told him actually ruined me. he was just this precious ‘lil awkward bean who deserved the world n’ still does, which is why i’m happy he ended up with madelaine. she will definitely give him more than i was able to, so, i wish ‘em nothing but the best. so yeah, if i could redo the entire joseph scenario then i would. for sure. but you know what’s scary ? i wouldn’t have seen it that way unless you would’ve brought it up. that means shawn would be joe n’ liam would be gregg ….. yeah, no, i don’t wanna play this game anymore. ❜

❝ it’s been rumored that you were pressuring shawn mendes to have a baby with you. do you honestly believe you’re ready for parenthood? and describe your relationship with your other boyfriend, liam payne’s son, bear. do you think your desire to have a child with shawn stemmed from your jealously over liam’s relationship with the mother of his child? ❞

❛ pressuring ? is that what you call it ? i, excuse me, was just throwing things out there n’ maybe, just maybe, it was aggressive as hell. am i ready for parenthood ? definitely. i feel like knowing that another life literally depends on me n’ my actions would be enough to finally snap me out of my shit. but to be honest, i would answer that except i don’t have a relationship with bear. it might be crazy to hear considering liam and i had a thing for months, but i thought it would be weird as hell from cheryl’s position. like, coming around n’ seeing this little stick figure with your child ? nope, i’ll spare myself from that scandal. also, jealousy ? what’s that ? have never, can never, will never experience that emotion in my entire life. thanks. ❜

and with that, my friends, it’s a wrap ! hopefully i didn’t say anything to offend anyone, i’m literally just telling my side of ... everything. whoever doesn’t like it could suck a fat one, preferably in my honor cause i haven’t gotten action in weeks. sorry. too much information ? ariana, stop talking !

#shq;task #....i was sO EXCITED ABT JAY #THT I FORGOT TO DO THIS ??????#I'M GOING 2 SLEEEEEP :))))))

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eurovosion · 6 years ago

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some thoughts on this year’s entries

or i guess just a ranking with comments tacked on

albania - this year’s nf season was a let down for me, partly because a lot of the winning songs weren’t the best on offer, and partly because albania picked first and nothing could live up to it. i love the depth this has, the dark, almost tribal vibes, and most of all i love how they didn’t fuck up the revamp like they usually do. if this is staged correctly, i think this could do really well. 10/10

greece - i feel like this has been overlooked in the wider fandom, which is odd because greek entries are usually pretty polarising, for better or for worse. regardless, i really like this. it’s atmospheric, powerful as hell, and katerine is more than capable of nailing it live. don’t count greece out just yet! 9.5/10

portugal - festival da canção was easily the best nf this year and the portuguese public picked wisely. telemóveis is such an intriguing song with a really curious sound, so traditional yet so modern at the same time. i’m not 100% on the staging, but they have time to figure it out. 9.5/10

spain - la venda wasn’t the song i was rooting for in the selection (rip todo bien, never forgotten) but i’m fully on board with it now. this works so well with a big audience, and you just know that the crowd will be on his side. if this doesn’t go top 10 at the very least i’ll be stunned. 9/10

cyprus - this is just as instant as fuego for me. not sure if tamta will do as well as eleni, but the cypriot delegation has definitely found their winning formula. 9/10

malta - malta is not fucking around this year. this is a verified banger, and their best entry in years, perhaps their best ever. take as many youtube ads as you want, michela, you deserve them. 8.5/10

azerbaijan - without a doubt, azerbaijan is back with a vengeance. you can tell they’re determined to set the record straight and prove that last year was just a blip, because this is great and hopefully the live performance reflects that. 8.5/10

denmark - i really should hate this, but i can’t. it’s so innocent and cheerily optimistic in a way that i can only be jealous of whilst humming along to the chorus. this deserves to do well. 8/10

italy - it took me a little while to warm up to soldi, but once i finally got there i really started to appreciate it. i don’t think it’s a winner, but it’s a very good song, and in the end that’s all that matters. 8/10

san marino - yes, serhat is in my top 10, and what of it? you only wish your fave could write a song in ten minutes and have it go off like this. and yes, if he doesn’t qualify you’ll catch me openly sobbing in the streets for weeks. 8/10

switzerland - an unabashed bop with some actual choreography, but lacking lyrically. then again, so was fuego and that popped off live. he’s also working with the same stage director as eleni, which can only be good news for him. 7.5/10

the netherlands - don’t get me wrong, it’s a very polished song and i’m sure duncan’s great but like... is that it? this is the big fan favourite? i’m very whelmed. 7.5/10

armenia - i was expecting something like yete karogh es from srbuk, so this came completely out of left field in the best way possible. i thought we’d lost our token edgy pop song when ukraine dropped out, but armenia saved us at the last minute. the only thing i’m worried about are her vocals, because, from what i’ve seen, she isn’t the most confident performer. 7/10

serbia - another respectable but ultimately pretty safe pick from serbia this year. nevena has a really strong voice and she sells the song well, so i think she’ll avoid another moje 3 style placement. 7/10

germany - first of all, aly ryan was robbed. secondly, thank god the surprise song didn’t win. thirdly, this is alright. nothing spectacular, but it’s cute and the spinning stage was a great stylistic choice. 7/10

latvia - thank you latvia for letting this win and rejecting markus riva’s basic ass for the sixth year in a row WHEW i really love the whole atmosphere that surrounds this. barring a miracle, however, i don’t think it’ll qualify, but it’s still a good attempt. 6.5/10

sweden - i don’t think it’s john’s most solid composition, but it’s a decent entry nevertheless and it’s nice to see sweden picking an entry that isn’t generic pop again. 6.5/10

united kingdom - my only faint glimmer of national pride so far this year is that we managed to pick the only good song from the flaming garbage pile that was our nf. yeah, the lyrics are redundant and it’s a ballad by numbers, but michael gives it his all and it really pays off. 6.5/10

ireland - this will absolutely not do well but who cares, it’s fun and harmless. super chill and easy to listen, and i think sarah’s a big eurovision fan already which is nice. also i’d just like to take this opportunity to thank her for ditching the ylva and linda song she originally applied with. 6.5/10

iceland - hm. this is one where you need to listen a few times to get a full impression of what the fuck you’re hearing/seeing. i really did not like this when i first heard it alongside all the other söngvakeppnin songs (and most of them sucked lbr), but now i’m kind of ambivalent towards it. i still don’t like the screaming or the key change, but it’s something different and i can admire that. 6/10

slovenia - fine, but forgettable. she has a nice voice, but there’s a distinct lack of stage presence from the two of them and i fear that this might get lost in the semi final. 6/10

israel - i’m conflicted here. i definitely don’t think home is as bad as the fan polls and reviews imply, but it’s not great either. a verse or two in hebrew would have really elevated this and i’m a little baffled as to why the writers didn’t include even a little bit considering the contest is on home turf this year. still, kobi’s a very convincing performer and israel probably didn’t want to win again anyway. 6/10

poland - this is an odd one, which isn’t a bad thing at all in a year full of safe entries. not sure if using the bilingual version was the best shout, but it’s clearly still very polish and i’m glad to hear that they’ll be wearing the traditional clothing on stage in tel aviv. 6/10

czech republic - the chorus absolutely slaps, and if i was judging by music alone this’d probably be in my top ten. unfortunately, though, the rest of the song exists. the lyrics are truly abysmal, with some of the lines ending awkwardly and without proper rhymes where they’re needed, and the spoken-word section is genuinely unbearable. 5.5/10

austria - i honestly don’t know where to place this one. very underwhelming when it was first released, but now i feel like there’s potential here. most of austria’s recent entries have been very under the radar only to end up doing quite well. i’m not as optimistic about this as some of those, but only time will tell. 5.5/10

hungary - not a patch on his previous entry, but pleasant enough. he’s a good performer and unless the staging really sucks, he’ll do fine. 5.5/10

north macedonia - it’s a nice ballad? i guess? and, unlike a lot of their recent entrants, tamara is an established singer who we all know can sing live. there are also rumours that the delegation has been planning the performance for a while, so who knows, perhaps this’ll qualify. 5/10

georgia - this has been growing on me lately. the song itself is a bit of a bust, although the revamp helped, but oto really brings it to life on stage. even if you don’t understand what he’s saying, you can tell by the emotion in his voice that he really means it. 5/10

russia - the nightmare dream team hasn’t produced a good song in over a decade at this point, this included. kirkorov needs to quit fooling himself and let someone else have a go. 4.5/10

belgium - belgium’s had quite the glow up since 2014, but i fear they’ve gone for style over substance this year. wake up is very polished, but it doesn’t go anywhere and eliot’s live performances haven’t been convincing as of yet. 4/10

lithuania - i don’t know what was more shocking, him winning the selection or me finding out that he was lolita zero’s real voice in 2017. this isn’t awful, just very repetitive and strangely put together. 3.5/10

norway - sue me, i don’t like this. the bald guy feels out of place and out of tune, it sounds like it was written by a child, and oh my god it’s so unbearably cheap. 3/10

estonia - eesti laul was such a let down this year. usually there’s a good mix of mainstream and alternative genres, but the new producer doesn’t seem to give a shit about variety, which is a real shame. anyway, victor’s performance is slick, but he can barely sing and the song itself is nothing to write home about. 3/10

romania - when this was first selected i didn’t mind it, probably because i just really didn’t want laura bretan to win, but as the season drags on i’ve really soured to it. it feels like it lasts for a minute longer than it actually does, and the whole ay-ay-ay part was not a good choice. 2.5/10

australia - as someone who was a big fan of estonia last year, this is honestly the furthest thing from that. it comes across as quite cheap (even without the questionable staging), and the chorus really grates on me. 2.5/10

belarus - i didn’t watch the entirety of the belarusian auditions for them to reject the potato monks in favour of lidl’s own brand zara larsson. 2/10

france - this is why delegations should be wary of selecting social media stars for their national selections. yes, they might get the viewing figures up a little, but they’ll probably win and the song will be Bad. i respect his message, but holy shit is this hamfisted as hell. 1/10

finland - if anyone was wondering how darude only ever had one hit two decades ago, here is your answer. 1/10

moldova - they really don’t want to qualify this year, huh. could’ve had ca adriano celentano, but nope. basic tune, painfully simple lyrics, but i guess her voice is nice enough 1/10

croatia - this... is awful. upsettingly so. at least jacques’ last entry had a novelty factor, but he’s doomed this poor kid to failure. 0.5/10

montenegro - i have absolutely nothing positive to say here. honest to god one of the worst songs i’ve ever heard, and no amount of clumsily shoehorned in folk instrumentation was ever going to save this. i can only pray that they’re spending their preparation time wisely and taking singing lessons, but considering that they probably blew half the budget on the music video, it’s unlikely. 0/10

as for potential winners, ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

a lot of the big fan favourites don’t have a winning vibe about them, so we might be in for a shock this year. please let it be albania or greece

also feel free to drop me an ask if you want to chat about last year’s entries since i kind of ditched tumblr for a year or two lmao

#god that's a straight up wall of text i'm sorry #i tried to format it as best i could i promise #but i am Very rusty #eurovision

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ujuro · 6 years ago

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this is my running list that i have kept in my drafts all year of things that i wanted from kpop in 2018. some are kind of vague but honestly which groups were “successful” and which weren’t is really obvious because the “unsuccessful” ones just didnt come back at all ugh

long post here we go

things i wanted from this year:

-success for wjsn: my girls got a win and their best-selling album yet so we’re on a roll now. but im somewhat worried because a lot of it comes from the new fame of c-line and between you and me i...dont think theyre ever coming back. prove me wrong yuehua.

-success for loona- is a debut mini selling over 50,000 copies success? ya know there are people that will say that based on how expensive and long their debut project was that everything was a flop and loona’s doomed but i dont really think that way. when lookin at it strictly as an actual debut they did great. i love my girls.

-success for clc- we’ll never know if anything could have come from a comeback after black dress because CUUUUUBBBBEEEEEE but im not salty or anything nooooo

-success for dreamcatcher: happyface and i think the girls themselves realize that their concept will never be mainstream but ya know what? my girls had a good year! they’re working hard and building a fanbase and theres nothing more i can ask for really

-someone please pay attention to sonamoo please: FUCK TS

-same for gugudan this is depressing: i dont know how their last comeback did but it seems like they kind of staying the same which is sad because gugudan probably ranks the highest of post ioi groups in terms of raw talent and consistently good music. stan my girl nayoung.

-weme and pristin to actually get non-controversial actually good title tracks so we can put all of that to rest (though i’d die for wee woo don’t fuckin try it): crush was well liked so we got that but FUCKIN PLEDIS OH MY GOD IM SO MAD IDEC THAT GET IT WAS GOOD THEY DIDNT GET A NON-CONTROVERSIAL TITLE TRACK THEY DIDNT GET ON AT ALL and NO PRISTIN V DOES NOT MAKE UP FOR IT FUCKIN PLEDIS anyway

-news on after school….any news…free them…: WELL lizzy is was freed and kaeun is in limbo (more on her later). now all we need is eyoung to be freed and i can sleep better.

-news on secret: the news is that TS is a shitshow but what else is new. at least hyosung and jieun were freed.

-FX COMEBACK- GODDAMNIT

-Shinee to be happy and healthy: this is sort of a wish because i can never really know if they’re happy but in terms of what i can judge aka content this was a great shinee year. minho solo when

-9muses comeback PLEASE: got a great kyungri solo debut and it aint over till hyemi says its over but please one more comeback PLEASE

-aoa comeback: FUCK ALL OF THE HATERS BINGLE BANGLE RULES AND U ALL SAID THEY WOULD FAIL WITHOUT CHOA HA

-hello venus comeback: LOOK i know fantagio is a mess but they managed to gave their other groups a comeback COME THE FUCK ON

-for companies to just stop kidding themselves and disband dal shabet and bestie: with woohee gones dal shabet is over and im pretty sure bestie’s company doesn’t exist anymore so i guess thats solved

-solji to come back to exid: YEEEESSSSSS OUR MOTHER AND QUEEN IS BACK

-more non-taeyeon snsd solos (and a taeyeon one too thatd be great): fuck solos we actually got lil touch i didnt see that coming at all. oh AND a bunch of solos too snsd had to die so snsd could live i guess.

-any post-ioi group to get a win: Dia and wjsn!

-ladies code comeback (or at least a hint at group activity): the hint came from a christmas song so i should be happy however i am unsatisfied.

-t-ara news: the news is theyre being secretive in between solo work c’mon hyomin give up your plans

-fiestar news-disbanded and im still sad

-brown eyed girls comeback: someday...i have hope...i know they want to...

-LEE HI COMEBACK: FUCK YG but that goes without saying

-deleted a stupid one sorry gyus

-yoongi singing: lol im not even into bts anymore but i still like yoongi and seesaw is still a banger great job my dude

-kaeun to get into the produce48 group: hmph. normally i wouldnt be worried with her high place and the hype like it should be easy to give her something to do right? however this is pledies we’re talking about so i can only hope that what lizzy said and the rumors of her joining a new girl group come true. argh why pledis id even trust her with cube over them look at soyeon

-girls day comeback: see brown eye girls above

-a not terrible produce 48 group k at least put hitomi in it: I love izone i got over my hangups with the lineup real quick and now cringe at grown-ass adults still going off about a fourteen-year-old. like y’all. you can stan the group its fine they’re nice and talented girls. i swear. you’ll like them. hyewon is my queen. i still find wonyoung too young to connect with (im finding now that im too old to truly bias any idol under 16 or even 17. yujin is fifteen but she’s near the middle of my izone bias list.) but ya know what? its fine. theres 11 other girls to like. la vie en rose is a bop. sakura i love you. that is all.

-PLEASE EX 2NE1 MEMBERS DO SOMETHIN; minzy’s touring and bom of all people seems likely to release solo work before cl but like. its sad man i dont really consider this one done. fuck yg.

-fuck an fx comeback someone just tell me if they’re alive: can i even answer this one i dont know i think i was mad when i wrote it

-some kind of jbj/ibi like group from produce 48: Nope, probably unlikely due to the difficulties of getting any akb girls over there (i follow all of the contestants on instragram and they all seem pretty busy like miu and sae and miho and miru have actual shit to do). but i can dream.

...

alright out of approximately 30 wishes (i cant count) about half of them (i cant count) were at least partially fulfilled. this year was great for a lot of groups i like but not really for my 2nd gen and post-ioi faves. all of my absolute fave stuff came from groups that didnt even exist last year- fromis, idle, and izone.

how do i even react to all of this im feeling to many emotions. moral of the story: fuck kpop companies the end

#words of mine #sorry #long post #but its been in my drafts for so lone i couldnt just leave it there

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deadcactuswalking · 6 years ago

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REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 28th April 2019 (Jonas Blue, Lil Dicky, Rita Ora)

Top 10

We have a couple new arrivals this week, but the biggest story is still how this song clings on to the top spot, as “Old Town Road” by Lil Nas X featuring Billy Ray Cyrus still at number-one for a second week, and both the meme and constant discussion surrounding the song continue to spread to the point where it’s a cultural phenomenon.

The rest of the top 10 is incredibly less interesting. “Piece of Your Heart” by MEDUZA and Goodboys is up two spaces to number-two. It could make a play for the top.

Lewis Capaldi’s “Someone You Loved” is also down a spot to number-three.

Down one position from last week is Billie Eilish’s “bad guy” at number-four.

Tom Walker’s “Just You and I” isn’t moving at number-five.

Avicii’s posthumous hit “SOS” featuring vocals from Aloe Blacc has boosted up six spaces to number-six, becoming Avicii’s first ever posthumous Top 10, as well as his tenth Top 10 in general, and Aloe Blacc’s third.

Up a spot from last week is the Jonas Brothers with “Sucker” at number-seven.

Russ (Splash) and Tion Wayne’s “Keisha & Becky” stabilises its spot at number-eight, down a spot from last week.

Elevating a single space from recent controversy is “Here with Me” by Marshmello and CHVRCHES at number-nine.

At #10, to round off our top 10, is “Talk” by Khalid, up a space and returning to the top 10.

Climbers

Wiley’s “Boasty” featuring verses from Stefflon Don, Sean Paul and Idris freakin’ Elba is up five spaces to #12, whilst “All Day and Night” by EUROPA featuring Madison Beer enters the top 20 at #14, up eight spaces from last week, becoming the first top 20 hit for EUROPA as a group, as well as Jax Jones’ seventh, Martin Solveig’s third as well as Beer’s first ever (Congratulations). Other than that, “Pretty Shining People” by George Ezra is up nine spots to #25, and his other song “Shotgun” is up seven to #30, so there must have been some sort of boost to the album sales, but generally, that’s all we have.

Fallers

We have a few more of these, or at least it seems these songs are more notable. “Giant” by Calvin Harris and Rag ‘n’ Bone Man finally gets its streaming cuts due to dumb UK chart rules and is down 10 positions to #16, whilst “Boy with Luv” by BTS featuring Halsey collapses 16 spaces down to #29 as K-pop always does, “Disaster” by Dave featuring J Hus is down six spaces to #33, whilst “wish you were gay” by Billie Eilish as well as “MONOPOLY” by Ariana Grande and Victoria Monet seem prepared for a premature exit, down 11 and 10 spots respectively to #37 and #40.

Dropouts & Returning Entries

I’m going to assume YNW Melly has had his streaming cut as “Murder on My Mind” is completely out of the Top 75 after dropping out from #38. Speaking of, “Options” by NSG and Tion Wayne has very unfortunately dropped out from #23 due to this dumb chart rule, which directly affects certain genres, i.e. urban music like hip hop and R&B (as well as EDM, for that matter) that is boosted prominently from streaming, from never having any longevity and not becoming as big as hits on the year-end than they deserve. “Options” would have been locked if it weren’t for this rule, as I think it would have lasted many more weeks. The other drop-out is from Ariana Grande and it’s “break up with your girlfriend, i’m bored” from #39.

NEW ARRIVALS

#39 – “Carry On” – Kygo and Rita Ora

Produced by Kygo and Afsheen – Peaked at #8 in Norway

Yes! I finally get to talk about Pokémon! I know what you’re thinking, what? Why? It’s just Rita Ora collaborating with some massive EDM producer like she always does, and while you’re right, it’s for the Detective Pikachu film, which isn’t currently out but I am going to see it at some point. I’m excited to hear this soundtrack as well, although I’m not exactly expecting Kygo and Rita Ora to deliver anything particularly good, or interesting, or Pokémon-related for that matter. Pokémon songs for the anime films have never directly related to the film plots, though, and usually were kind of boring, motivational songs with very vague lyrics, which is understandable as they had to be rushed out every single year. Anyway, this is Kygo’s seventh Top 40 hit and Rita Ora’s 21st, which is impressive, and is it any good? No. Of course it isn’t, and I’m mostly indifferent on this tasteless drivel that EDM producers put out in general with female pop singers where it sounds like the singers have been artificially sped-up, with mixing that’s overly-drowned in reverb and an instrumental as dry as clay years after it is first moulded. The piano melody here isn’t bad, but it isn’t unique and doesn’t carry Rita Ora’s incredibly weak hook, and in general her performance here sucks, like that random “Woo!” she adds in that pauses the song entirely just to halt his momentum, to add nothing at all! There’s barely a real drop here, so it just feels like a constant onslaught of nothingness and high-pitched vocal samples, which I somewhat like for its effort not to make a club banger but rather a tropical house ballad straight out of the dregs of 2016, and it’s not the last new arrival we have that does that here, but this is the only one I’ll talk about in this episode, more on that later. Anyways, this isn’t worth much analysis. It’s dreadfully boring but it’s not exactly long and doesn’t overstay its presence for THAT long, I suppose, it’s just disappointing for a soundtrack that is supposed to provide the music for what is looking out to be a film full of personality with actors oozing charisma. I’m looking out for the Sonic the Hedgehog film’s soundtrack a bit more now, albeit just for the novelty of a Dr. Robotnik cover of “Gangsta’s Paradise”. Next.

#27 – “No Diet” – Digga D

Produced by Ghosty

Digga D is a UK drill artist, as most of the rappers we see on the charts are in 2019. I’ve only vaguely heard of him before, so I think it’s safe to assume that the extreme marketing for the song involving a lot of different companies and individuals, including Mixtape Madness, is what landed this on the charts as Digga D’s first top 40 hit, as well as the video which is about trafficking crack cocaine in Coca-Cola cans... sure. Anyway, is the song itself any good? Well... the beat is incredibly minimalistic like most UK drill, with just an ominous piano line as the backing for a skittering hi-hat and bass-heavy trap beat – those 808s, by the way, are pretty insane. Digga D isn’t really saying anything of interest or anything different than the other guys, but the beat is good enough to carry him a lot of the time, and I love his weird sounds he uses for the ad-libs. It reminds me of a British Migos, where instead of repeating the line, he just makes unintelligible nonsense words and stutters. The singing on the second verse is pretty janky in relative to when it appears in the verse, and while Genius says this and the supposedly playful lyrics are what sets it apart, I don’t see the juxtaposition here, I just think it’s kind of surreal in how bipolar this song feels. There’s an ominous, eerie and menacing beat, violent and braggadocious lyrics from Digga, and then a bunch of silly, humorous ad-libs over it. This song has an identity crisis first and foremost, and while we’re at it...

#24 – “Earth” – Lil Dicky

Produced by benny blanco and Cas—

Nope. No, sorry, not touching this one. I appreciate what it’s doing for charity but I have a LOT to say about this song and trust me, it is not overwhelmingly positive, so, no, I’m not covering this one, at least not like this, and not right now. I might do a full-length review at some point but I think it’s much more likely that I talk about this at the end of the year, if you get the gist. For now, to replace an actual review, let me just list the guest stars, because technically, this is a song by Lil Dicky featuring Justin Bieber, Ariana Grande, Halsey, Zac Brown of his eponymous band, Brendan Urie of Panic! at the Disco, common fungus Hailee Steinfeld, Wiz Khalifa and Snoop Dogg, Kevin Hart as Kanye West, Adam Levine of Maroon 5, Shawn Mendes, Charlie Puth, Sia, Miley Cyrus, Lil Jon, Rita Ora, Miguel, Katy Perry, Lil Yachty as an STD, Ed Sheeran, Meghan Trainor, mother-father gentleman PSY, professional basketball player Joel Embiid, Tory Lanez, John Legend, Bad Bunny, Kris Wu, Leonardo DiCaprio and the entirety of the Backstreet Boys. Does that count as a review for Lil Dicky’s second UK Top 40 single? I don’t care, I’ll talk about in length when I want to. Trust me, I’m planning ahead.

#23 – “What I Like About You” – Jonas Blue and Theresa Rex

Produced by Jonas Blue – Peaked at #1 in Belgium

Oh, yeah, this, okay, well, Jonas Blue exists, I guess, and I’m supposed to review everything he puts out because everything this dude makes charts... and sucks. I don’t really have a problem with the dude, but nothing he makes is all that interesting, and he’s the epitome of carelessly generic EDM and dance-pop. This particular track features vocals from Theresa Rex, Danish pop singer who you won’t know by name and she doesn’t even have a Wikipedia page, but you will know the voice of from “Solo Dance” years back, which she had uncredited vocals on (I’m glad they stopped not crediting the vocalists on EDM tracks, especially since, you know, they do all the heavy lifting in terms of singing). The production here is pretty tropical, I guess, with some handclaps and a weak synth drop that has a few orchestral stabs to replace any unique instrumentation. None of the vocal melodies catch on yet and I’d much prefer “Solo Dance” to this. What else am I supposed to say? I know I’ve taken the easy way out with these two songs, but honestly we’re at a standstill in the charts right now where it should really be more interesting than it is.

Conclusion

Even if I didn’t review it, I don’t care, Lil Dicky and friends still get Worst of the Week for “Earth”, with Dishonourable Mention going to Jonas Blue and Theresa Rex for “That’s What I Like About You”, or something to that effect. In fact, there’s no Best of the Week or Honourable Mention, the Dishonourable Mention is tied as Kygo and Rita Ora’s “Carry On” exemplifies the exact same problem. God, what a crappy week. Follow me on Twitter @cactusinthebank for more pop music ramblings and Top 20 rankings, and I’ll see you next week!

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obtusemedia · 6 years ago

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In Ascending Order: Ranking Taylor Swift’s singles worst to best

After slowly tilting her sound away from Nashville more and more with each album, Taylor Swift made a clean break from country five years ago with her synthpop masterpiece, 1989. It was about as successful as a pop album could be, producing three massive #1 hits and cementing Swift as the world’s biggest popstar.

Fast forward three years, and her next album, reputation, was bitter and moody — a good fit for the American landscape of 2017, but a far cry from the bright melodies and fun sing-a-longs of her previous smashes, Red and 1989. The lead single hit #1, but quickly stumbled down the charts and the album’s follow-up singles didn’t have the same impact. But you’ll still find those who defend reputation, and a year and a half later, it’s clear there are some gems hidden in the wreckage.

Now that Swift is entering her 30th year of life with a catalogue that’s ran the gamut from country-fried ballads about teen crushes to vengeful electropop bangers about Kanye West, I thought it was a good time to look back on her career. Because despite her negative (sorry) reputation right now, Swift has contributed many great songs to the modern pop canon.

Here’s the ground rules: The song had to be a single from one of Taylor Swift’s six albums. No deep cuts (apologies to “All Too Well”), no soundtrack tunes (sorry, Fifty Shades) and no featured spots on others’ songs (asking me to listen voluntarily to John Mayer is too much to ask, sorry).

#37: “End Game” feat. Future and Ed Sheeran (reputation, 2017)

Listen, Taylor, if you want to have guest rappers on your single, that’s fine. But maybe get, you know, actual rappers. Ed Sheeran doing his awkward schtick certainly does not count. If this was a hip-hop flavored pop song, fine — then why is legitimate rapper Future here? The Atlanta trap icon feels so out of place on this gentrified R&B cut, and he only gets a few bars anyways, making his appearance seem more like Swift wanting cred more than anything else.

Honestly, if that was the only problem, “End Game” wouldn’t be last place on this list. But nope, the song itself is a giant mess in itself. The production aims for sexy and nocturnal and lands in lethargic. And what is this song even about? Is Taylor making a song about how cool she and her boyfriend are, or about her negative reputation? The post-chorus, which suddenly veers into that later topic, tries so desperately to be a chant-along and it falls utterly flat.

With all of Swift’s other singles, even the ones I don’t like, I at least understand how someone could like it. But I have no clue who “End Game” is for, or who would enjoy listening to it.

#36: “Ours” (Speak Now, 2010)

I’ve listened to this song many times, and I find it hard to remember a single hook or line. “Ours” isn’t aggressively awful, but it is painfully bland, and I have no plans on listening to this nondescript ballad after I’m done writing this.

#35: “Fifteen” (Fearless, 2008)

I can’t take away the good intentions of “Fifteen.” The general message of being wary of manipulative older men (or, in this case, high school seniors) and enjoying youth while it lasts is nice, if a bit cliché.

But this song still bugs me. Swift sings the story of her and her (real-life!) friend Abigail’s experiences as ninth-graders like she’s a wise elder, looking back with years of experience. But she was only 18 when she wrote “Fifteen” — I’m sure she matured some in those three years, but once you realize that, it makes the whole song come off as fairly condescending.

Couple the after-school special lyrics with a sickeningly sweet acoustic guitar musical style, and “Fifteen” doesn’t hit the mark.

#34: “Gorgeous” (reputation)

The lyrics aren’t the problem here (except that any Angeleno knows that at the intersection of Sunset and Vine, it’s just a Walgreens). Nah, it’s the shrink-wrapped production that drives me nuts. There was the potential for a great, 1989-esque pop song here, but it got neutered.

#33: “Mean” (Speak Now)

Given that Swift eventually became the music industry’s Regina George, this song has aged horribly. Also, this sounds way too much like the Country Bear Jamboree for me to take it seriously.

#32: “Bad Blood” feat. Kendrick Lamar (1989, 2014)

The worst song from Swift’s best album, “Bad Blood” is a clunky mess that frankly doesn’t go hard enough. If you’re going to make a diss track towards Katy Perry, go for the kill shot! Prism was mediocre, her whole look was tacky, she wrote this disaster — Swift had plenty of options. But I guess she felt adding a couple phoned-in Kendrick Lamar verses, getting Selena Gomez and Lena Dunham (??) in the music video, and spouting clichés did the job better. *shrugs* At least it’s catchy.

(Side note: Perry obviously lost that feud, but “Teenage Dream” is absolutely flawless and probably better than any song Swift wrote)

#31: “Everything Has Changed” feat. Ed Sheeran (Red, 2012)

“Everything Has Changed” has a gorgeous, wilting chorus, and Swift and Sheeran have clear chemistry. Beyond that, it’s unfortunately kind of forgettable.

#30: “Fearless” (Fearless)

I’m honestly not sure why this needed to be a single. It’s fine and all, but it doesn’t stick in the brain compared to Fearless’ other smash hits.

#29: “New Year’s Day” (reputation)

Ending the brash reputation with a quiet, sparse piano ballad was a smart move, and the bittersweet “New Year’s Day” is a solid enough tune.

But here’s the thing — Swift wasn’t the only popstar in 2018 to put a minimalist, Jack Antonoff-produced piano song on her album. Lorde did nearly the exact same thing just a few months earlier with the heartbreaking “Liability,” which is much rawer and more intense than “New Year’s Day.” In other words, when I hear Swift’s ballad, I enjoy it, but I find myself wishing she went for the emotional jugular like Lorde did.

#28: “Tim McGraw” (Taylor Swift, 2006)

Here’s the part where I admit that I’m really not into country music, so a lot of Swift’s very early material isn’t for me. But, like with other genres I don’t love, I can at least respect talent, and “Tim McGraw” is a great piece of detailed, nuanced songwriting. But acoustic-y country ballads will never be my favorite.

#27: “The Last Time” feat. Gary Lightbody (Red)

Here, we have the opposite situation as “Tim McGraw” — a musical style I love, but not done very well.

These types of Coldplay-esque, faux-indie power ballads were totally my thing back in the day (shoutout to The Fray and obviously, Coldplay). But although “The Last Time” does have real bonafides with its soaring chorus, great guitar solo, and Snow Patrol frontman Gary Lightbody contributing vocals, it just doesn’t click. The duo doesn’t have a lot of chemistry, and the epic feel shoots for “Chasing Cars” and lands closer to...one of Snow Patrol’s other songs that nobody remembers.

#26: “...Ready For It?” (reputation)

I’d love to just make a snarky joke about Swift trying to rap and embarrassing herself in the process (which she kind of does) ... but I can’t lie, this is a total guilty pleasure. It’s about as close to a classic Ke$ha song as we’re going to get in the gloomy late-2010′s, so I can forgive the try-hard vibe.

#25: “Our Song” (Taylor Swift)

This is the very first of Swift’s songs I ever heard. Naturally, being a 13-year-old wannabe snob at the time, I hated it immediately.

Over a decade later, I can appreciate “Our Song” for its adorable charms and extremely quotable lyrics (“when you talk reeeeeeal slow” is my personal favorite). But it still rubs me the wrong way a bit, probably because Swift was pretending to be a southern hick when she was actually raised by a wealthy family in Reading, Pennsylvania. ...but it’s still a solid pop tune.

#24: “Mine” (Speak Now)

So uh...I guess Swift really wanted to write a Bruce Springsteen song? Specifically, a more optimistic version of “The River,” with a romantically doomed teenage flame sputtering out into adult financial troubles.

But obviously, a song about a shotgun wedding and blue-collar poverty wasn’t going to sell to Swift’s audience, so she gave the trope an uplifting spin, complete with a bright, peppy chorus in a major key. And it kind of works! I’m not going to pretend that “Mine” is top-tier Taylor, but sometimes rough stories do have a happy ending.

#23: “Should’ve Said No” (Taylor Swift)

A nice and pissed-off song about a cheating boyfriend, “Should’ve Said No” has a great, visceral chorus and Swift puts 100 percent of the blame on her scummy ex, who’s trying to weasel his way back into the relationship. I will say this about country: it’s a great vehicle for breakup songs.

#22: “The Story of Us” (Speak Now)

This is a great example of a very under-used style of breakup song — the slowly-drifting-apart story. It’s not usually as fiery, but it’s a lot more realistic and relatable. The best recent example I can think of is The 1975′s new wave heartbreaker “A Change of Heart,” which admittedly, is a lot better than “The Story of Us.”

Still, Swift gives the trope a nice effort here, and the charging guitars perfectly match her growing frustration at this boy who gets more and more distant as time goes on. The book framing device is a nice twist too (“NEXT CHAPTER.”), and it all adds up to one of Swift’s more underrated singles.

#21: “Look What You Made Me Do” (reputation)

Ahh yes, the infamous Kanye West diss track. Let’s be clear, nobody looked good in this feud — Taylor came off as vindictive, back-stabbing and petty. Then Kanye lost any moral high ground by wearing MAGA hats and buddying up to Trump.

The funny thing is, the songs from both artists that are central to this feud — “Look What You Made Me Do” and Kanye’s “Famous,” the song that reignited Swift’s rage — are both deeply ridiculous songs that I love despite my better judgement. The main issue with Swift’s song is that she can’t decide whether to play the cackling villain or the victim. The smart move would’ve been to lean into her dark side, like Kanye himself did with Yeezus, but she isn’t willing to completely do that, which makes the song have a pretty awkward tone.

YET. “Look What You Made Me Do” is still way too much fun for me to hate. The “I’m Too Sexy”-aping chorus? Love it. The thumping, wonderfully stupid Black Eyed Peas-esque production? Give me more! “I’m sorry, the old Taylor can’t come to the phone right now. Why? BECAUSE SHE’S DEAD!!” — that might be my favorite part of all.

It’s a total disaster, but it’s a highly enjoyable one. But considering that I find other bombs like Lady Gaga’s ARTPOP fascinating too, maybe my opinion isn’t valid on this one.

#20: “22″ (Red)

I read a tweet once that called this song the “Kidz Bop ‘Tik Tok.’” Don’t remember who wrote that, but they’re absolutely right. Not that there’s anything wrong with that! It’s probably the closest Swift came to a squeaky-clean Carly Rae Jepsen banger.

#19: “White Horse” (Fearless)

The darker cousin of “Love Story,” Swift proved with “White Horse” she could also use classic tropes to convey weepy ballads as well as the sweeping romances. I honestly wish the lyrics were a little less vague — usually Swift is hyper-specific, which serves her well in these breakup songs — but Swift’s emotive performance carries the song regardless.

#18: “Begin Again” (Red)

Musically, the sleepy sound of “Begin Again” doesn’t do a lot for me, but the lyrical detail and story are stellar. After listening to so many Taylor Swift songs about crushing heartbreak or whirlwind romances for this list, it’s nice to hear a more understated song about a first-date that goes well. It especially works well at the end of Red, a fairly angsty album.

“Begin Again” might still have some exaggerations (nobody’s first date is that perfect, Taylor, come on now), but the more grounded, mature tone was a nice change of pace for Swift.

#17: “Shake It Off” (1989)

This song is so, so stupid. And yet I know every single word. Yes, even the incredibly awkward rap breakdown (“THIS. SICK. BEAT!”).

I can’t in good conscience name “Shake It Off” as a top-tier Swift single, but it’s damn fun, despite its awful lyrics. Which basically makes it — gasp — a Katy Perry single. Oh, the irony.

#16: “Delicate” (reputation)

Swift went nocturnal with this sleeper hit. I couldn’t get into it at first, but it eventually grew on me, with its subtle production and charmingly insecure lyrics. Who among us hasn’t nervously second-guessed everything they’ve said or done when they’re around a new romantic partner?

The vocoders and slowly building percussion just add to what was already a solid groove, and it’s no wonder that “Delicate” eventually creeped up the charts despite the fact that, as Swift said herself, her reputation’s never been worse.

#15: “Picture To Burn” (Taylor Swift)

If I’m going to enjoy a country song, it better be ridiculous and stuffed with as many goofy clichés as possible. The single can’t take itself too seriously (and should be super catchy, of course). This is why some of the few country songs I semi-ironically love sound less like George Strait and more like “Man! I Feel Like A Woman.” If all country music was as silly as “Save A Horse, Ride A Cowboy,” I’d probably like the genre a lot more.

“Picture To Burn” isn’t quite on those songs’ level, but it nearly matches the same level of yee-haw fun. Swift puts on an aggressive Southern accent, there’s a literal banjo solo at one point, and it’s about the best country topic there is: getting revenge on your ex!

Swift leaves no shot unfired as she calls out her former boyfriend for her “stupid ‘ol pickup truck you never let me drive,” calls him a stupid redneck, threatens to date all his friends and even gets her daddy involved. (At one point, the song contained a lyric about telling his friends he was gay, but thankfully, she later removed it)

It’s not quite “Honky Tonk Badonkadonk,” but it’ll do in a pinch.

#14: “Wildest Dreams” (1989)

One of the smartest things Swift’s done during her blockbuster pop era is cribbing ideas from other musicians and adapting them to her own personality. As mentioned earlier, “22″ is her version of a Ke$ha party song, “Mine” is like one of Springsteen’s heartland tunes, and “Shake It Off” is an intentionally dumb Katy Perry single.

But probably the most obvious example of this is “Wildest Dreams.” And the artist Swift cribs from on this sweeping ballad is more of a cult favorite than a true pop megastar: Lana Del Rey. Don’t lie, you hear it too: the cooing, sensual vocals, the cinematic sound, the lyrics that evoke classic Hollywood romance. It’s basically just “Summertime Sadness” without the Spaghetti western guitars.

And that’s absolutely a good thing! Although Swift doesn’t have Lana’s stunning alto vocal (sorry, but you know it’s true), she can still absolutely play that classic movie starlet role. Add a bit more modern pop structure to Del Rey’s indie-darling formula, and you’ve got the recipe for an easy standout track.

#13: “You Belong With Me” (Fearless)

Pointing out that “You Belong With Me,” arguably Swift’s biggest early hit, is problematic isn’t a new take. The idea of that someone inherently “belongs” with you because you like them has been debunked. I’m sorry this guy doesn’t you like you back Taylor, but maybe he has a good thing going with that cheer captain who wears short skirts? Let him be.

...but on the other hand, Swift was 19 when she wrote “You Belong With Me.” Most people criticizing the lyrics here are doing so through an adult vantage. Yes, the message is toxic, but it’s also extremely accurate to how teenage crushes work. I can promise you that I had similar feelings in junior high/high school, and I know I’m not alone in that regard.

Also, “You Belong With Me” is far too catchy and bouncy to truly hate. So although I can’t rank it too high due to the iffy lyrics, I can’t deny that it does tap into some raw teen emotions, even if they’re ugly.

#12: “I Knew You Were Trouble.” (Red)

I was there. That fateful day in 2012 when Taylor Swift *gasp* MADE A DUBSTEP SONG. People were snarking that this was basically just Skrillex for the Forever 21 crowd, sharing around that (hilarious) screaming goat remix, and so on.

But seven years later, although that dubstep production is oh-so-early-’10s, “I Knew You Were Trouble” absolutely holds up. If Swift was going to abandon country, why not go all out? Besides, the drop still hits with a lot of force, mirroring the visceral anger of her lyrics. If anything, it isn’t intense enough. Maybe she really should’ve gotten Skrillex to produce...

#11: “Out Of The Woods” (1989)

YES inject that synthy Jack Antonoff production right into my veins.

I’m still upset that “Out Of The Woods” wasn’t a smash like 1989′s other singles, but it is a pretty weird song. The chorus is aggressively repetitive (its only real flaw), it’s a breakup song that’s less relatable lyrically and more abstract, and America was too busy paying attention at the time to Bieber semi-apologizing.

But THAT PRODUCTION. It’s nervy yet propulsive, with a quiet-loud-quiet setup that any good power ballad needs. Antonoff even provides some backup vocals, which is always a welcome addition. Swift herself really sells the song too. I wouldn’t say she’s a powerhouse singer, but she’s really giving it her all here in terms of vocal force — something she typically shies away from.

“Out Of The Woods” will likely be lost to time for all but the most ardent Swifties. But for those who love it, may I suggest listening to some Bleachers?

#10: “Back To December” (Speak Now)

The stereotype of Swift’s breakup songs, particularly in the early stage of her career, was that they weren’t self-aware and basically demonized whatever boy the song was about (or the girl she was jealous of). And while that’s not 100 percent true, the stereotype did have some merit back then.

That’s why “Back To December” was rightfully hailed as a breath of fresh air for Swift, and it’s held up extremely well nine years later. The perspective has shifted — in this story, she’s the one admitting guilt for ending the relationship. It’s a very measured, mature song, but with still enough tender emotion and regret to stay relatable. The orchestral sweep is a nice touch as well, emphasizing the tragedy of the situation.

Also, fun fact: This song is about Swift’s relationship with Twilight hunk Taylor Lautner. Maybe the relationship didn’t work out because she thought it was weird to date a guy with the same name? It was probably because she’s more of a Hunger Games fan.

#9: “Getaway Car” (reputation)

Here’s the one thing reputation improved upon from 1989. As just a cursory listen could tell you, “Getaway Car,” sonically, is extremely similar to “Out Of The Woods.” They’re both pulsing, synthy new wave tracks with a heavy Bleachers influence — considering they’re both Antonoff productions, not surprising at all. It even steals a lyric from Bleachers’ “Rollercoaster.”

So what makes “Getaway Car” a superior sequel? Well, it’s a smoother ride, for sure — the aggressively repetitive chorus in “Out Of The Woods” was that song’s weak spot. And “Getaway” has a more clear concept as well, being about a Bonnie and Clyde-inspired escape from a failing relationship, invoking all the bittersweet emotions that come along with that. “Out Of The Woods” is...about a car crash with Harry Styles? I guess?

It’s really a personal call. They’re both amazing songs, I just happen to think Swift and Antonoff refined their collaboration on this later attempt.

#8: “Teardrops On My Guitar” (Taylor Swift)

“Teardrops On My Guitar” is both obviously written by a 15-year-old kid, but also so, so much better than that implies.

The lyrics here are extremely wholesome and corny — unlike “You Belong With Me,” Swift doesn’t even take any shots at the girl her crush is currently dating, and there’s references to “wishing stars,” something I think I’ve only ever heard in Disney songs. And like many of Swift’s early songs, it absolutely nails the yearning emotions of a teenage crush, especially for those of us who were too shy to do anything about them.

But obviously, Swift wasn’t an average ninth-grader. The lilting melody in the verses of “Teardrops” fits the lyrics perfectly. And the song comes off both very polished and radio-ready, yet still plucked right from the pages of a diary. Yes, Swift co-wrote the song with pop-country songwriter Liz Rose, but that’s not unusual for a very young artist. Lorde’s “Royals” (written at age 16) had a co-writer, too.

The simple beauty of “Teardrops” is what brought Swift into the mainstream, and there’s a good reason for that: it’s an incredible start to a career.

#7: “Blank Space” (1989)

“Blank Space” might be the only intentional, successful self-own in recent pop history. I can’t think of another time when an artist eviscerated their public persona with such surgical precision, and it actually made them more endearing.

Tired of trolls constantly making jokes about her short relationships and constant breakup songs, Swift decided to make the joke herself, 8 Mile-style. In “Blank Space,” she paints herself as a psychotic maneater who will drive any guy insane. Out of all her disses over the years, she might have saved the best barb for herself: “Darling, I’m a nightmare dressed like a daydream.” The instant tone switch from the cooing, seductive first verse to the furious, delusional second verse is brilliant.

If there’s one flaw to “Blank Space,” it’s that the production is maybe a tad too minimalist for such an intense song. But the hook is still massive, and the song isn’t about the production anyways: It’s 100 percent a lyrical showcase for Swift, and a way to beat her haters at their own game.

Dissing yourself while still coming off smart is a tough tightrope to walk, as “Look What You Made Me Do” unfortunately proved. But with “Blank Space,” Taylor proved that, even if for a brief moment, she controlled the narrative.

(Also, this is Taylor’s best video. Obviously.)

#6: “Sparks Fly” (Speak Now)

A lot of the other songs in this top 10 work because of a very specific reason, whether it be the production or a clever lyrical conceit. But it’s difficult to describe what makes “Sparks Fly” fly so well.

At first glance, it’s not that much different than other early upbeat Swift singles — it’s got the country-rock guitars, lovesick lyrics, a bit of a twang but not too much. But this is where that formula reaches perfection. It’s no wonder that after “Speak Now,” Swift tilted hard into pure pop, because she wasn’t going to top this.

The chorus is passionate and soaring, with even the percussive lyrics ( “Drop. Everything. Now.”) contributing. And this seems like a super-odd aspect of a Taylor Swift song to compliment, but “Sparks Fly” also has a fantastic guitar riff — something few of her pop contemporaries would try.

Sometimes what makes a song great is to just have every aspect go perfectly, and that’s exactly what happened with “Sparks Fly.”

#5: “Red” (Red)

The title track to Swift’s instant-classic album Red is the closest she’s come to being a full-fledged rockstar (well, that and album cut “State Of Grace,” which is an obvious U2 pastiche). It’s definitely more of a country-fried, Sheryl Crow brand of rock, but it suits Swift well. There’s even a killer guitar solo!

As a summation of a whirlwind relationship, “Red” absolutely nails the bittersweet feelings that come after a breakup. Even the best moments or aspects of her ex have a dark side, but she seems equally wistful about the worst moments. And the color-based chorus (a few years before Halsey stole the idea), complete with a new wave-y vocal echo, is simple but effective. It’s the perfect middle between Swift’s uber-pop era to come and her Nashville songwriter past.

#4: “New Romantics” (1989)

I was hesitant to include “New Romantics” on this list. Yes, it was a single, but it was also a tacked-on bonus track to 1989. But it’s too damn perfect of a pop song to leave off.

Honestly, how was this not included in the regular tracklisting of 1989? Yes, it’s her best album, so there’s not a lot of filler, but “New Romantics” would’ve still been an improvement over nearly all of the songs there. The production by pop wizards Max Martin and Shellback pops and whizzes with energy. It’s pure ‘80s heaven, with an anthemic sing-along chorus and bouncy synths and drum machines.

But naturally, Swift herself is a major factor to why “New Romantics” is such an effective pop song. Her vocal delivery here has a knowing wink, with a bit of snark. You might even call it Debbie Harry-esque. For a song where Swift is conveying the joys of non-stop partying, she certainly sells it. And I’d imagine if she released it as a regular single earlier in 1989′s cycle, it would’ve been another #1 smash.

#3: “Love Story” (Fearless)

“Love Story” deliberately misinterprets multiple literary classics to create an uber-cheesy, ridiculous fairy tale. And it’s easily the best song of her country era, and one of the best pop songs of the ‘00s, bar none.

The star-crossed lovers angle is overdone, yes, but Swift sings about this secret relationship with such passion and earnestness that it feels fresh again. When the surprise ending comes and the boyfriend proposes (wait, aren’t they both high schoolers? Maybe wait a bit on that one, guys), it’s got all the sappiness of a Hallmark special, and yet it totally works. You can tell the then-18 Swift didn’t find this cheesy in the slightest, and her bold, passionate sincerity works.

Even the fact that the song seems to not understand what The Scarlet Letter was actually about, or how Romeo and Juliet ends, is honestly more charming than anything else. “Love Story” is like a puppy — full of boundless joy and absolutely impossible to resist, despite not being all that smart.

#2: “Style” (1989)

I can’t imagine the confusion and shock that Swift’s management must have felt when she told them she wanted to record a song that sounded like the Drive soundtrack. But it was an absolutely brilliant move, and it gave us the song that will likely age better than any of Swift’s other singles.

To be fair, “Style” is much more radio-friendly than your average Chromatics single — but not by much! Swift’s vocals are less ethereal than Ruth Radelet’s, and the hooks are much more obvious. But many Chromatics songs, or songs from Drive, are already pretty catchy — Swift just needed to maximize them into a slinky-yet-explosive new wave behemoth.

The pulsating synth background and Swift’s whispery vocals make “Style” an all-time classic song for aimlessly driving around at night, yet it’s big enough to fit in with her more blunt hits. In fact, it might be the one time she actually seemed *gasp* cool. It’s too bad reputation tried so hard to recapture this dusky vibe and utterly failed, but at least we’ll always have her first attempt.

#1: “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” (Red)

It took Swift many, many tries to capture that elusive first #1 hit. But when she finally reached that pinnacle in 2012 with the gleefully venomous “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together,” it made perfect sense. After all, it’s her best song.

Swift has written many breakup songs before, but she’s never had this much fun knocking down her ex — in this case, the famously sleazy John Mayer. And her digs are just so relentless and delivered with a perfect smirk. There’s the dig at Mayer listening to “some indie record that’s much cooler than mine,” which drips with sarcasm. She calls him out for his inability to fully commit, saying both that his breakups and makeups only “last about a day.” And of course, there’s also that wonderfully exasperated phone call, where Swift groans about her ex’s persistence, calling the situation “exhausting” and mocking him.

The best part is that all of this is delivered in a sugary-sweet, insanely catchy campfire sing-along that wouldn’t leave anyone’s heads in the fall of 2012. That chorus is just so joyful and fun that you have expect the little bouncing ball to pop up next to the “WHEEE-EEE!”

It seems weird to say Swift’s best song is also her big sell-out moment, but some artists were just meant to be pure pop. And in Swift’s case, she didn’t sacrifice any of her sharp songwriting en route to a catchier, more fun sound, which created one of the most iconic pop songs of the ‘10s.

#taylor swift #pop #country #In ascending order

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placetobenation · 6 years ago

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Tomorrow is another one of those Divas anniversaries – fourteen years to the day since Trish Stratus and Lita wrestled in the main event of Monday Night Raw in a Women’s Title match.

This is a big one, not only because it was just the second time a women’s match headlined an episode of Raw without any pesky men around, and not only because it was the biggest bout yet between the two biggest stars of the era, but also because it was the culmination of a nine month feud that was far and away the best thing about Raw in 2004.

On a personal note, this is the 20th Deep Dive I’ve written for you kind folks, and in an extraordinary and uncharacteristic show of restraint, I Dove Deep nineteen whole times while barely mentioning the greatest of all time, my sun and stars, moon of my life, Trish Stratus. Now, that’s simply because I’m so excited to talk about ALL of these women and there’s so much to cover, but that streak is well and truly over today because for real dudes, Trish Stratus in 2004 is the greatest gift that He ever sent down from the heavens to grace this wretched wasteland of a planet.

She is God tier.

The entire feud is fantastic, in fact, so let me spin you another yarn. There are about three different soap opera storylines to get through here so the short version of this preamble is that in late 2003 Trish and Lita, bestest best friends, were being pursued by Jericho and Christian respectively, the boys made a bet for $1 (Canadian) that they could hit that, Jericho ended up catching feelings and turning babyface, only for Trish to kick his ass to the curb and turn heel and mack on with Christian on the WrestleMania XX stage.

Thank u, next.

You may wonder how Trish goes from breaking Jericho’s heart to making Lita’s life a living hell. After all, last we saw they were bestest best friends! I’ll tell you how. This was all the fault of a women’s battle royal. In wrestling, some battle royals are throwaway. Others change the course of the next nine months of television. This was the match that launched a thousand skits.

It was a couple weeks after WrestleMania, and this particular battle royal was for No. 1 Contendership. Basically all of the other dorks got tossed during the ad break and we end up with Trish and Lita facing off in a big finishing stretch to determine the winner. Despite Trish and Christian still being in the middle of their feud with Jericho, and despite Jericho’s interference late in this match handing Lita the victory, Trish seems FAR more offended at Lita beating her than at anything Jericho is doing. It’s a subtle shift in Trish’s motivation, where the focus of her vitriol becomes her bestie/archrival, Lita, someone she’s comfortable fighting against, instead of a man that she isn’t really a physical threat to. Heel Trish liked to punch down, and Lita was a much easier target.

She had NO IDEA how much of an easy target Lita would soon become.

For reasons that remain unbeknownst to this day, I believe, one fateful day on Raw, Kane decided to interrupt a Divas tag team match, corner Lita in the ring, and forcibly kiss her. Oh yes my dudes, THIS WHOLE THING THAT HAPPENED.

Kane began stalking Lita on Raw every week, with her then-boyfriend Matt Hardy often getting in the middle. Trish Stratus observed her best friend being relentlessly stalked and molested by a psychopathic monster and decided, “Yep. I am going to ROAST THE SHIT OUT OF THIS BITCH LMAO”

She started out with the gold standard of fuckwithery, “Oh no! Look out! Kane’s behind you! BAHAHAHAHAHA!” And just stepped it up from there.

When Kane defeated Matt Hardy at SummerSlam 2004 for the right to marry Lita (I know, I know…) Trish was kind and thoughtful enough to corral the other heel Divas and throw Lita a bridal shower! (And let me tell you, the way that Trish utters the phrase, “Because you have to marry *KANE*” is just… I saw God.)

Then we ALL saw God when she crashed the wedding itself.

If you can get past the outfit, this run in is also basically the greatest speech anyone has ever made at a wedding. “All you have to do is open your heart! Just like you opened your legs!”

Holy moley.

When Lita was impregnated with Kane’s demon baby as a result of Kane coercing her into sex to protect Matt Hardy (hmmm why does this sound so familiar??) who else was there to greet her backstage with jokes about it “festering” inside her but King Dick Trish. That whole episode in fact (Raw, September 6th) was basically a one woman show. She dragged Lita mercilessly for getting knocked up by Kane, turned around and dragged Nidia for yelling at her in Spanish (“I don’t speak German!”), then dragged Nidia in the ring to one of her best matches like the GOAT she is, and then when Nidia started making her comeback, Trish could super not be fucked dealing with it and just straight up RIPPED NIDIA’S SHIRT CLEAN OPEN to distract her and kicked her head off.

I have no words for that kind of thuggery.

But back to our bullshit, when Lita then lost the aforementioned demon baby after an unfortunate and definitely-not-his-fault incident with Gene Snitsky (I KNOW, I KNOW OKAY!), who was there waiting to savage her some more about losing her pregnancy weight and drop lines like “At Survivor Series you’re gonna lose to me, just like you lost your baby” ?? You guessed it! King Dick Trish, the fucking asshole. What kind of prick trolls someone about having a miscarriage? Jesus.

Speaking of Survivor Series, let me catch you up on other, more normal events. At Bad Blood 2004, after an original Victoria vs. Gail Kim defense was changed to a four way with Trish and Lita, Trish, of course, stole the winning pin from under Lita’s nose and won the belt. From there it’s a tale of two women; Trish ruling atop of the Women’s Division as champ, and Lita toiling away in the Utter Bullshit Division. For months they only really ever met in these backstage skits and promos where Trish would body her over and over when she knew Lita couldn’t retaliate. And that was all they needed to make it the hottest feud on Raw.

Finally, in November Lita moved from the Utter Bullshit Division back into the Women’s Division and immediately set her sights firmly on Women’s Champion King Dick Trish Stratus. The match is made for Survivor Series. Jericho hosts a Highlight Reel featuring the both of them in the lead up, and he brings a referee out with him because he’s TERRIFIED of having them in the same room together.

With good reason. They’ve barely laid a hand on each other since that title match back in June. There is five full months of angst packed into this powder keg.

And it well and truly goes off at the PPV.

Trish comes out first and is STILL making puffy cheeked chubby faces as Lita makes her entrance, determined to make absolutely sure of her own death I guess. Lita walks down to the ring and punches Trish right in her fucking face. And punches her again. And again.

Then they go outside and all hell breaks loose. Lita grabs a chair and absolutely WALLOPS Trish for the DQ. Trish BLEEDS. Women NEVER bleed on WWE TV, but Trish got that juice brother. Lita kept going crazy and blasted Trish from behind right into the stairs in one of the greatest camera shots of all time. Trish freaks out spectacularly at the sight of her own blood. And somehow, considering this was an immediate DQ finish for a PPV title match they spent half the year building, this was some great business.

From this point forward Lita is fascinating to watch. You might think she’d go on some crazy tear of babyface revenge going after Trish’s title, but she’s actually the complete opposite. She’s not frantic or wild or in a hurry. She’s… calm. Almost serene. It’s as if she knows at this point that she HAS Trish. She’s got her. She’s finally free to fight her, she already beat the shit out of her at Survivor Series, now Trish is wearing a face mask on her broken nose that Lita can gleefully target, and she knows her day is coming. Lita is completely free to punch Trish in the face all she wants for all of the shit she’s been talking all year. Lita is free. Finally. And so she doesn’t chase Trish. She takes her time. She enjoys it. After all of the crazy shit she’s gone through in 2004, it’s actually a relief to just enjoy beating up a familiar foe in a wrestling match.

I bang on a lot about Trish here, and it’s always the heels that get to have more fun, but don’t sleep on Lita. She was also great during this entire angle (while having to do some truly horrid bullshit) and this part of it in particular was some fantastic work.

So the return match for title is finally made (by the ever-present Chris Jericho in his role as guest GM, in a nice touch) for the December 6th Raw. This show happens to be in Charlotte, not very far at all from Lita’s hometown at the time of Sanford, NC. The Women’s Title gets that main event slot baby. They spent the whole night recapping the feud to build up to it. Jim Ross dropped a great line about how to these women, this title means as much as the World’s Heavyweight Title does to the guys. The scene is set.

But not before one last backstage skit. We couldn’t really have it any other way. Trish had taken to calling Lita “The Walking Kiss of Death” and jokingly asked who’s career Lita was going to kill tonight, to which Lita obviously replied, “Yours” and gave her a big smackeroo. Now, Lita was just being smart here because as we know from this and Mickie James in the near future, kissing Trish before a match increases your chances of having a motherfucking BANGER with her by at least 1000%.

That’s just science.

What is a lot harder to explain with science is how Lita actually survived the match.

Y’all remember THAT bump. Lita hit a tope and landed so hard on her face her body scorpioned ov-argh. Nope. It’s fourteen years later and we know she was fine but man is it still hard to watch. She only came back from the broken neck a year earlier! Lita is officially a cyborg.

I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention it, but it’s a shame that the scorpion bump is sometimes the only thing people remember about this match. What’s important to remember about this match is that IT FUCKING RULED.

The tension was palpable from the bell, and the crowd was ready. Trish took off her face mask and used it as a weapon BECAUSE HER FACE WAS FINE AFTER ALL in a move so dastardly it caused Jim Ross to wig the fuck out on commentary. Lita’s bad bump ended up serving the match, lending a lot of weight to Trish working over Lita’s head and neck during the heat. Lita came back with a powerbomb and the rare and elusive women’s superplex. There were a bunch of great, close nearfalls, and at this point the crowd was going insane chanting for Lita. When she finally went up and hit the redemptive, life affirming Moonsault for the win, people went APESHIT. J.R. literally screamed himself hoarse raving about Lita coming back from all that punishment and winning the belt.

A trillion and three quarter stars.

Revolution or no Revolution, this is still one of the very best women’s matches in company history. And the perfect capper, at that point, to a rivalry that had started all the way back in 2000, and boiled over so spectacularly in 2004. I just love these women.

You can actually watch the full match on WWE’s Youtube here.

That was a lot, and yet like, I feel like I didn’t even scratch the surface with Trish, or even get into half of the stuff with Kane and Lita and all of that nonsense. I’m going to suppress the masochistic urge to dive into it that further, and come back next week to talk about another one of my favourite girls, the unfairly-maligned Divas of the world.

Check it out: No. 1 Contender’s Battle Royal (Raw, April 5th 2004) Trish Stratus vs. Lita (Raw, April 12th 2004) Trish Stratus vs. Lita (Raw, May 17th 2004) Victoria vs. Gail Kim vs. Trish vs. Lita – Women’s Title (Bad Blood 2004) Trish Stratus vs. Lita – Women’s Title (Survivor Series 2004) Trish vs. Lita vs. Molly – Women’s Title (Raw, November 22nd 2004) Trish & Molly vs. Victoria & Lita (Raw, November 29th 2004) Trish Stratus vs. Lita – Women’s Title (Raw, December 6th 2004)

#IFTTT #Place to Be Nation

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eddiejpoplar · 7 years ago

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2018 New York Auto Show Hits, Misses, and Revelations

NEW YORK, New York — The New York International Auto Show has hereby won the right to call itself the North American International Auto Show next year, as it has usurped the erstwhile holder of that title, Detroit, with more newsy and relevant car and truck unveilings. Mercedes-Benz, BMW, and Porsche all will be here again in 2019.

This year, New York has the usual fleet of new sport/utility vehicles, including such high-volume models as the Toyota RAV4 and Subaru Forester. But there are actual autos—cars—here as well, including a Nissan Altima that proves the brand’s revived commitment to the midsize sedan segment.

And there is a concept car that has taken our breath away like no other concept, at Detroit, Los Angeles, Frankfurt, or even Geneva has, this year …

HIT: Genesis Essentia Concept

And the winner of the “Wait, that’s a Hyundai?” award goes to this breathtakingly beautiful concept car. What a work of art.

—Aaron Gold

Star of the show, and probably the auto show season. It’s exactly the sports grand touring (electric vehicle) design that Genesis needs in order to build up its luxury brand credibility.

—Todd Lassa

MISS: Cadillac XT4

The XT4 looks to be a solid ute with an efficient 2.0-liter engine, it has technology on par with the competition, and the interior looks to be well built. It’s just that it doesn’t move the compact crossover market in any real way. There’s nothing groundbreaking here. I know Cadillac is thrilled to have another crossover and it will likely sell well for them. But other than the Cadillac style, it’s just another in a crowded sea of offerings. The fact that the refreshed CT6 with its 4.2-liter twin-turbo V-8 took center stage at Cadillac’s New York show stand and not the XT4 speaks volumes.

—Mike Floyd

HIT: Cadillac XT4

Has there ever been a good small Cadillac? The former Standard of the World has been trying and failing for the better part of four decades, but it looks like they finally got it right. The XT4 is cute and playful, a little cheeky even, and yet it still has the dignity and stateliness of a proper Cadillac. The XT4 may prove be the first baby Caddy worthy of the name.

—A.G.

HIT: Cadillac CT6 refresh

Cadillac injected a good dose of Escala concept design language into the CT6’s facelift, while adding the CT6 VSport and the new twin-turbo V-8 options. I think it works. Cadillac’s successor to the Northstar V-8 has been an on-again, off-again proposition for more than a decade, as the luxury brand faced the question of whether it could credibly take on the Germans and Lexus (and now, Genesis) by sticking with the modern Chevrolet small block instead spending big cash on its own, overhead-cam V-8. The timing of its release isn’t great, but the low-volume, hand-built nature of the twin-turbo 4.2-liter suggests it will be an expensive and rare option. Now, if only Cadillac could do something about the sub-German interior quality.

—T.L

HIT: Cadillac CT6 VSport

When the CT6 first came out, I wrote a review challenging any 7 Series owner to take the twin-turbo V-6 CT6 for a spin. If they came back and said the Caddy wasn’t as good as their Bimmer, either they were lying or they didn’t know how to drive. The addition of a twin-turbo V-8 can only make this car better. Now if only Cadillac can do something about the snoozer styling…

—A.G.

HIT: Volkswagen Atlas Cross Sport Concept

There are a lot of compliments I can fling in the direction of the seven-set Volkswagen Atlas; “sexy” is not one of them. But now that I’ve seen the five-seat Atlas Cross Sport—whoa, Nellie. This new SUV-to-be combines the Atlas’ squared-off styling cues with the shape of the old Touareg. Love, love, love. What we saw here in New York is the concept version, but the Atlas Cross Sport is destined for production and I doubt it will look too much different. I can’t wait to see the real thing.

—A.G.

Or is it Atlas Sport Cross? Cross Atlas Sport? Hate the name, but as SUVs go, the new two-row 2020 VW Atlas is rather rakish for a sport/ute. It is to the three-row Atlas what the VW Arteon is to the Passat.

—T.L.

HIT: Volkswagen Atlas Tanoak Concept

Designed as a vision of how VW could potentially expand the Atlas lineup, the Tanoak’s massive mug screams truck, though the production model would likely have some functional limitations. It definitely looks cool, and given that the Atlas line is built here in the U.S., a truck version is not out of the question.

—M.F.

How do I love VW’s proposed pickup? Let me count the ways. First, I love the way the box cuts into the cab. It puts me in mind of the old Ford Explorer SportTrac, another sort-of pickup that wasn’t trying to look like a miniaturized F-150. I love the way the Atlas’ squared-off styling works on a pickup truck. And I love the fact that VW is being honest about this being a utility vehicle with a pickup bed, rather than a pickup, period. (Are you listening, Honda?) Volkswagen says they have yet to make a decision about putting the Atlas Tanoak into production, and they are gauging public reaction. Public, I implore you to react. I want this thing to happen.

—A.G.

MISS: Volkswagen Atlas Tanoak Concept

Well, you asked, VW. The company says its gauging public and press reaction, and is looking at clinic and sales data before its pickup truck concept gets a green light for production. The first sport-ute pickup was the Chevy Avalanche—remember that one? —and the only unibody, transverse-engine competitor, the Honda Ridgeline, typically does well in its first year (which means, maybe 35,000 units) until everyone who wants one has one, then it settles in below 20,000 per year. The latest Ridgeline AWD gets 18/25 mpg, not much better than the V-6, 4WD Chevrolet Colorado (17/24) or Toyota Tacoma (18/22), and the Chevy and Toyota are available with both four-bangers and RWD, so where’s the unibody truck advantage? While the VW Atlas Tanoak is a credible looking, nearly full-size truck, it’s not going to do much to utilize the Chattanooga plant’s capacity.

—T.L.

What in the heck is a Tanoak? I’ll give VW credit. I highly doubt that name was trademarked and it vaguely makes me think of trees, so there’s that.

—M.F.

HIT: Light up VW badge

VW showed this on their Atlas concepts. Please, Volkswagen, make this happen. Please.

—A.G.

REVELATION: Tanoak is a tree. Don’t name your pickup after a tree.

If you’re going to build the Tanoak, Volkswagen, and you probably will despite my objections, please, please change its name to something relevant to your brand: VW Atlas Chicken Tax Exemption.

—T.L.

HIT: Genesis G70

Three words: Manual friggin’ transmission.

—A.G.

We were still reveling in the stunning beauty of the Genesis Essentia when Hyundai’s nascent luxury brand unveiled its BMW 3 Series competitor, the G70. Already, the fluid, organic lines of the Essentia have translated to a production model. That should be no excuse for denying the Essentia EV production, however.

—T.L.

MISS: 2019 GMC Sierra AT4

This would have totally been on my “hit” list but for the wheels, which, like the Grinch’s heart, are two sizes too small.

—A.G.

REVELATION: Something else for Bugatti?

I spoke with Stephan Winkelmann, who has bounced from his longtime role with Lamborghini to Audi and then to help launch Audi Sport, about what’s next from his current Volkswagen Group brand, Bugatti. As always with any exec, he wouldn’t talk specifics, but when I asked if there was room for something else coming for Bugatti beyond the Chiron variants, his non-answer (“I think the brand has a lot of opportunities to do more”) and grin spoke volumes. It seems silly to put Winkelmann in charge of a brand to simply oversee 500 Chirons being built. My money is on some sort of SUV, because of course.

— M.F.

HIT: Lincoln Aviator

When I first saw the design sketches of the Aviator, I thought, Oh, here we go, another Range Rover clone. Shouldn’t someone remind Ford that they sold Jag-Land Rover years ago? But after seeing the new Aviator in person, I changed my tune. This is a good-looking Lincoln with handsome proportions and a great interior. The promise of rear-wheel-drive is, well, promising. Lincoln is keeping mum on the powertrain specifics, only saying that it’s a twin-turbo engine, but if it’s anything like the 400-hp grin-generator in the Continental, then life with this Lincoln is going to be very, very good.

—A.G.

HIT: 2019 Toyota Corolla Hatchback

The present Corolla iM hatch looked decent, but it didn’t excite in any real way. The significantly reworked 2019 Corolla hatch has the potential to change that, thanks to its new TNGA platform underpinnings and Toyota’s new 2.0-liter engine mated to either a six-speed manual or CVT with a launch mode. No power ratings yet, but it should top at least 150 horses. Kudos to Toyota for keeping the hatch in the Corolla lineup. I hope it drives as good as it looks.

—M.F.

HIT: Nissan Altima

Looks like the Altima has picked up some of the Maxima’s mojo, and I love it. I’m sure some will disagree with me, but I think this is a great looking car inside and out. I can’t say I’m optimistic about the driving experience, not after the lackluster showing of the Rogue and Rogue Sport, but I’m hopeful that Nissan can pull some of that old-time magic out of its hats and make this Altima as good to drive as it is to look at.

—A.G.

It seemed Nissan had given up on sedans when the now-retiring Altima came out, and went straight-to-rental. But the new one, with its optional variable compression turbo four (replacing the V-6 option) and an interior that would have been considered premium a decade ago, indicates that Nissan is as dedicated to the future of its sedans as is Honda.

—T.L.

HIT: 2019 Toyota RAV4

Whoa. Wait. What? When I first saw the new RAV4, I figured it was an early April Fool’s joke. Nope—despite the fact that the current conservatively-styled RAV is selling like ecstasy at a rave (do either of those things still exist?), Toyota has taken the RAV4’s styling in a completely new direction—and what a stunner it is. Some of Toyota’s recent designs have been a bit awkward, but I think this one works, inside and out. In a way, it reminds me of the love child that might result from the coupling of a 4Runner and a Venza. That’s a good thing. Let’s hope the market agrees.

—A.G.

Toyota has split the RAV4 into two designs, both ditching the Camry-like nose. The Adventure series comes with a Tacoma-like grille that’s supposed to make you think you’re driving body-on-frame sport/utility, which doesn’t quite work on that level, though it does take a lot of the “cute” out of this cute/ute.

—T.L.

MISS: 2019 Subaru Forester

I know, I know—you don’t mess with success. Still, did Subaru have to make the new Forester look so much like the old Forester? Frankly, I’d be perfectly happy if the new car looked more like the first-gen Forester. Twenty years is long enough for a retro-mobile, right?

—A.G.

REVELATION: Subaru’s design “aesthetic

Look at the Mark I Forester on Subaru’s stand, and you can see that the Crosstrek has replaced that model [full disclosure: I just bought a new Crosstrek] in the brand’s expanding lineup. The Forester is compact SUV-sized, which is to say, like a Honda CR-V, Toyota RAV4, etc., and like those rivals has grown over the years. As for the design, well, you generally don’t buy from this brand for the styling, so much as the anti-styling.

—T.L.

MISS: Acura TLX 2.4 A-Spec

At its press conference, Acura mentioned that the V-6-powered TLX A-Spec was proving to be a big hit with younger and more affluent buyers, so they have decided to bring out a version of this car with the 2.4 liter engine. Er… guys… First, it’s the V-6 engine that makes this car. Second, why would affluent buyers opt for the cheaper engine? I can’t see this going well at all. Why not put the Accord’s 2.0T engine in the TLX? Now that would be an A-Spec to get excited about. Save us, RDX!

—A.G.

HIT—I hope: 2019 Acura RDX

The current RDX is, in my opinion, one of the better vehicles in Acura’s lineup; the fact that it’s an aging and fairly conservative design, both visually and mechanically, doesn’t say much about this lost-in-the-weeds brand. But the new RDX looks to be a ray of hope. With a longer-and-lower look than the current car, it’s attractive without being silly. The 2.0-liter turbo engine should prove to be just as much of a gem here as it is in the Accord (assumi from Performance Junk Blogger 6 https://ift.tt/2J5u7Sz via IFTTT

#IFTTT #Performance Junk Blogger 6

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jonathanbelloblog · 7 years ago

Text

2018 New York Auto Show Hits, Misses, and Revelations

And there is a concept car that has taken our breath away like no other concept, at Detroit, Los Angeles, Frankfurt, or even Geneva has, this year …

HIT: Genesis Essentia Concept

And the winner of the “Wait, that’s a Hyundai?” award goes to this breathtakingly beautiful concept car. What a work of art.

—Aaron Gold

Star of the show, and probably the auto show season. It’s exactly the sports grand touring (electric vehicle) design that Genesis needs in order to build up its luxury brand credibility.

—Todd Lassa

MISS: Cadillac XT4

—Mike Floyd

HIT: Cadillac XT4

—A.G.

HIT: Cadillac CT6 refresh

—T.L

HIT: Cadillac CT6 VSport

—A.G.

HIT: Volkswagen Atlas Cross Sport Concept

—A.G.

—T.L.

HIT: Volkswagen Atlas Tanoak Concept

—M.F.

—A.G.

MISS: Volkswagen Atlas Tanoak Concept

—T.L.

What in the heck is a Tanoak? I’ll give VW credit. I highly doubt that name was trademarked and it vaguely makes me think of trees, so there’s that.

—M.F.

HIT: Light up VW badge

VW showed this on their Atlas concepts. Please, Volkswagen, make this happen. Please.

—A.G.

REVELATION: Tanoak is a tree. Don’t name your pickup after a tree.

If you’re going to build the Tanoak, Volkswagen, and you probably will despite my objections, please, please change its name to something relevant to your brand: VW Atlas Chicken Tax Exemption.

—T.L.

HIT: Genesis G70

Three words: Manual friggin’ transmission.

—A.G.

—T.L.

MISS: 2019 GMC Sierra AT4

This would have totally been on my “hit” list but for the wheels, which, like the Grinch’s heart, are two sizes too small.

—A.G.

REVELATION: Something else for Bugatti?

— M.F.

HIT: Lincoln Aviator

—A.G.

HIT: 2019 Toyota Corolla Hatchback

—M.F.

HIT: Nissan Altima

—A.G.

—T.L.

HIT: 2019 Toyota RAV4

—A.G.

—T.L.

MISS: 2019 Subaru Forester

—A.G.

REVELATION: Subaru’s design “aesthetic

—T.L.

MISS: Acura TLX 2.4 A-Spec

—A.G.

HIT—I hope: 2019 Acura RDX

#IFTTT #Performance Junk Blogger Feed 4

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jesusvasser · 7 years ago

Text

2018 New York Auto Show Hits, Misses, and Revelations

And there is a concept car that has taken our breath away like no other concept, at Detroit, Los Angeles, Frankfurt, or even Geneva has, this year …

HIT: Genesis Essentia Concept

And the winner of the “Wait, that’s a Hyundai?” award goes to this breathtakingly beautiful concept car. What a work of art.

—Aaron Gold

Star of the show, and probably the auto show season. It’s exactly the sports grand touring (electric vehicle) design that Genesis needs in order to build up its luxury brand credibility.

—Todd Lassa

MISS: Cadillac XT4

—Mike Floyd

HIT: Cadillac XT4

—A.G.

HIT: Cadillac CT6 refresh

—T.L

HIT: Cadillac CT6 VSport

—A.G.

HIT: Volkswagen Atlas Cross Sport Concept

—A.G.

—T.L.

HIT: Volkswagen Atlas Tanoak Concept

—M.F.

—A.G.

MISS: Volkswagen Atlas Tanoak Concept

—T.L.

What in the heck is a Tanoak? I’ll give VW credit. I highly doubt that name was trademarked and it vaguely makes me think of trees, so there’s that.

—M.F.

HIT: Light up VW badge

VW showed this on their Atlas concepts. Please, Volkswagen, make this happen. Please.

—A.G.

REVELATION: Tanoak is a tree. Don’t name your pickup after a tree.

If you’re going to build the Tanoak, Volkswagen, and you probably will despite my objections, please, please change its name to something relevant to your brand: VW Atlas Chicken Tax Exemption.

—T.L.

HIT: Genesis G70

Three words: Manual friggin’ transmission.

—A.G.

—T.L.

MISS: 2019 GMC Sierra AT4

This would have totally been on my “hit” list but for the wheels, which, like the Grinch’s heart, are two sizes too small.

—A.G.

REVELATION: Something else for Bugatti?

— M.F.

HIT: Lincoln Aviator

—A.G.

HIT: 2019 Toyota Corolla Hatchback

—M.F.

HIT: Nissan Altima

—A.G.

—T.L.

HIT: 2019 Toyota RAV4

—A.G.

—T.L.

MISS: 2019 Subaru Forester

—A.G.

REVELATION: Subaru’s design “aesthetic

—T.L.

MISS: Acura TLX 2.4 A-Spec

—A.G.

HIT—I hope: 2019 Acura RDX

#IFTTT #Performance Junk WP Feed 4

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