#it never left my mind and I've been dying inside searching for something to say otherwise

[haru-chi]

Okaaaay I'll drop this crazy thought that's been on my mind for ages for Seiji ...

If I said, what if something within him is yokai-related, would that make any sense to you ??

[ramen-writes]

"Saints, what happened to you?" He says frustrated as he rubs his temple. "You used to do what I say without any question. You used to-"

"You want to know what happened?" I ask. Controlled smile on my face but I try to bite down my tongue to stop me from letting the anchor I feel on my chest free.

"You really want to know what happened to me? You did" I glare at him. He's older, wiser. My mentor who took me off the streets but right now I don't- I can't see him as that as anyone but the person who turned me into a monster.

"You happened to me."

He sighs in exasperation, as if I'm a kid throwing a temper tantrum. It annoys me and makes me feel so small.

"What in this world are you talking about, child?" he pinched the bridge of his nose and sighs yet again.

"I'm talking about how you made me into a pawn doing your bidding!' I yell. That does it. He looks up at me and glares.

"I did not such thing, I saved you"

"You used me!"

"I've raised you since you were a child"

"You didn't raise me, you trained me"

"I turned you into a hero"

"No" I shake my head, tears threatening to fall down my face but I hold my head high. "No, You turned me into a weapon"

"You saved hundreds of people"

"And I killed a hundred more!"

"They were the enemy"

"They were innocent"

"Nobody's innocent"

"I was!" I yell. "Maybe not now, not with all I've done, with all the blood on my hands but I was. I was innocent before you plucked me like a flower you found pretty. Li-like your favorite little toy you got to control"

He looks at me in something that looks too much like disgust.

"I wanted you to be better". He finally says and I think I hear my heart crack.

"I didn't want to be better" I say, almost a whisper. "I just wanted to be happy" my voice cracks.

He scoffs, "Stop living in delusion and take a look around you. You are in a better situation then half the people in this town. You should be grateful"

"Grateful? Grateful?! You took me from the only people I had with the promises of helping everyone else and what happened?!" I ask.

"What happened to that promise? Because last I took a look around me people were dying, last I took a look around, the same people you promised I would help live a happy life are dead or barely surviving in the slumps that you promised to clear!" I yell, my body is trembling but I stand tall.

"You promised I would help them if I went with you. That they'll be happier if I left them without the burden of taking care of me" I whisper. My heart aches, I miss them, I miss them so much that my heart longs for them. They were the closest to family I had and I.... I left them.

"You promised I would be helping them, that my sacrifice would be for the greater good. I was a sacrifice! And for what?!"

"Well some promises get compromised" he states, ever so steady and it makes me want to scream and yell all over again. Like the kid he thinks I am.

"I built you up to be stronger, to protect your people" he says.

"But what about me?! I didn't need to be stronger I needed to be protected too! I was a child"

"I did protect you!"

"You never protected me, you stifled me, you hide me! You protected me like a bomb that could explode at any moment".

"What was I supposed to do" he scoffs "treat you like a fragile flower? Act like you're a child?"

"But I was a child! All you had to do was treat me like I was a human-"

"But you aren't!"

That makes me pause, I look at him, his eyes don't waver. "Wha- what" I barely get out.

"I said, that you aren't a human"

I feel like all the air has been sucked out of my lungs and I feel myself get lost inside my mind, like I'm no longer in my body.

"B-but" I gulp, tears threatening to fall "You said I was human like all of you. You're the only- the only person to tell me that-"

"I said what I had to to keep you from becoming the monster everyone claimed you already were" he looks at me, I searched for any sign that he is lying, that it was said in anger, I search for guilt or regret to his words but I find my self detecting none.

"You're lying" I say though my voice sounds like it's not a part of me, it's distant as if even it knows that I'm searching for diamonds in a coal mine, that this was the only truth he has uttered this entire conversation.

"Don't kid yourself" he sneers. "You always knew you weren't human. Humans can't do what you can. You already knew that you were different, but I never expected you to turn into the monster even after all I did to save you. But I guess it was faith itself-"

"No" I shake my head, looking him dead in the eye. I hate that my body is trembling, that my knees feel like they will buckle any second now but I try, I just try.

"This was all your own doing, you turned me into this"

"You did this to yourself" he snarls and glares at me.

Tears are already rolling down my face but I can't do anything but try and keep my head high, not let myself fall, not now, not ever again.

"You can't blame me for the cracks in my window when you are the one who handed me the hammer" I say. "I won't let you make me believe that I was born like this when you're the one who destroyed the only part of me that could feel"

[caffeineforbucky]

As Time Goes By...(Chapter three)

A/N: This one took a while to write. I've just been so busy doing absolutely nothing all while procrastinating, so special thanks to that. No, but I really hope you like this, fellow reader. If you like the series, let me know if you want to be tagged!

(Side note: I've been playing RE8, thirsting over lady D, and dying over and over...it's going great! It's part of the procrastination...)

Also, has anyone seen the Bridgerton musical tiktoks? I swear I've had the 'burn for you' song in my head all last month and if you've been living under a rock...here's the link:

https://youtu.be/EwY9_m5qeow

Word Count: 2,299

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Fem! Reader

Warnings: I don't know....angst? As always, John Walker!?! AKA; Fake Cap. Umm...If I missed any let me know.

(A little PSA: I don't hate John Walker: or the actor. John is a well-written character. This is just strictly for the purpose of where my story is going. I'm more reiterating how Bucky treats him in the show. Thank you!!)

You groan, rolling from your left side to lay flatly on your back, arms spread out beside you. You inhale deeply, becoming aware of the moistened dirt and crushed wildflowers beneath you as they release their aromatics. Birds chirped around you, the busy sounds of traffic fading away while you lie still in the field, oxygen feeling heavy in your lungs.

"Y/N?!"

You barely heard the worrisome calls of Sam over the sound of your heart pounding in your ears. You lift your head, the view of icy mountains in the distance, blurry figures making their way towards you while you somehow managed to sit up. Your head was spinning, a sharp ache on the side of your thigh.

Your eyes flickered down, taking note of the small paring knife lodged in your thigh. You exhaled softly, nodding your head at the sight of it. "Okay," You grumble in agreement. With shaking hands, you wrap your fingers around the handle, bracing yourself by taking intervolved breaths before carefully pulling it from your thigh.

You worked fast, ignoring the crunch of rocks and dirt under the acknowledgeable footsteps of Sam and Bucky. Taking babochka, you cut off the end of your pant leg, wrapping the spandex around your wounded thigh before securing it with one of the holsters, tying the ends into a knot. You remain quiet, carefully pushing yourself up to your feet, transferring all of the weight to the opposite leg, eyes drifting up to meet the guys. "Are you guys okay?" You murmur, dusting off the clumps of dirt and dead leaves from your jacket.

"Are you?!" Sam exclaimed incredulously. "You're bleeding!" He points out, gesturing to the bright red staining the skin of your calf as it dripped down to your boot. The wrap might've held the wound shut, but that didn't mean blood wouldn't have soaked through.

"Oh, this?" You ask, glancing down at your leg, the wound throbbing in agony, but you did your best to avoid it. "I've had worse." That was true, from all those years fighting as an avenger. Getting shot, kicked, stabbed, beaten until you were purple, and undergoing mind control. This tiny stab was the least of your worries. It still hurt like hell, and you couldn't hide the discomfort in your features.

"Do you want a piggyback?" Bucky asks suddenly, slightly annoyed at your nonchalance and still concerned nonetheless. You weren't expecting it, the odd but kind offer, especially from the menace himself. Though you weren't one to pass up being carried. With a hesitant nod, you agree, watching Bucky crouch just a bit, allowing you to climb on his back.

The position was awkward for both of you. With his hands tightening on the back of your knees and your arms wrapped around his neck, neither of you could think straight. Yet, you were still thankful. The road to the airport was a long one, and you weren't sure if you could make it in your state. Bucky held you as if you weighed nothing, his super-soldier strength showing off while he carried you on his back, footsteps matching up with Sam. He didn't mind doing it, especially since he was the one who offered, and the proximity was just a bonus.

"Sorry about Redwing," Bucky muses, breaking the silence while the three of you sauntered down the empty road. There was nothing for miles, only empty plains of grass and dirt. Young trees scattered, lacking the greenery around them, evident of the cold weather in Munich.

"No, you're not," Sam remarks, narrowing his eyes to a pinprick at the winter soldier. "You've always hated Redwing."

"That doesn't mean I'm not sorry about it," Bucky grumbles, tightening his hold on you as he felt you slipping. You gasp at the sudden strength, clinging better to his shoulders as well. "How're you doin' up there?" He asks, jaw clenching from your touch.

"All things considering," You sigh, pushing aside the butterflies in your tummy at how close you were to Bucky. "I've been better. We've gotta find out where that super serum is coming from."

"Yeah," Sam chimed in, glancing at you. "-And how the hell after 80 years are there eight super-soldiers runnin' loose?"

Loud honks of a horn ring in your ears, tires treading on the gravel as an army jeep slows down beside the three of you. "So, that didn't go as planned, huh?" John chuckles, pushing the door open only for you to keep walking, paying no mind to the man in stars and stripes.

"Okay, keep going," John utters, signaling the driver to keep up as he pulls the door shut. "Look, at least we know what we're up against, huh? And I'm pretty sure it's one of the big three...so,"

"Aliens, androids, or wizards," Lemar comments as John nods his head in agreement.

"There's no such thing as wizards!" Bucky grunts, keeping his eyes forward, hands on the back of your knees.

"Fine, aliens or androids," John settles, sharing a look with his best friend beside him. "Look, it's 20 miles to the airport, and you guys need a ride. Gary, stop," He instructs, the wheels slowing down. John opens the door once again. "Get in," He sighs, motioning all of you inside the jeep as Bucky and Sam's footsteps came to a halt.

Bucky gently sets you down, taking note of the small whimpers falling from your lips. No matter how tough you appeared to be, you still carried so much vulnerability. "You okay?" He asks, eyes filled with so much concern it almost scared you. He hadn't looked at you like that in a while. "Do you want any help?"

With a soft nod, you oblige to Bucky's ask, needing more help than you anticipated. You didn't want to add any strain or force to your injury. You didn't even realize it happened, and that part of it was Sam's fault for swooping to grab you while you had a knife in hand, but you weren't going to start pointing fingers. You wrap your arm around Bucky's shoulder, using him as support while he boosts you up on the jeep after Sam climbs up first, helping you settle beside him.

"Woah!" John exclaims, almost rising to his feet at the sight of your thigh, your hands stained with blood. "Are you okay?"

With a curt nod, you adjust yourself to relieve some of the pressure while Bucky takes a seat on your left, leaving you to be right smack dab in the middle as he pulls the door shut. You blow out a breath, knowing damn well if it hadn't been for the mishap, you would've walked the damn 20 miles.

"Lemar, hand me the first aid kit," John instructs, pointing to the steel case beside his friend. You wanted to protest, but even you knew that the strap wasn't going to work. Mouthing a thank you, you take the case from Lemar's hand and clip it open.

"Okay, so we got eight super-soldiers on a bulk supply run," John continues, the jeep beginning to roll down the road. You hand the case to Sam, asking him to hold it while you searched for gauze, medical tape, and butterfly bandages, you were probably going to need stitches, but you'd worry about that later. "Why?" John asks, watching closely as you patched up your wound.

"They say their mission is to get things back to the way it was during the blip," Sam answers, handing you another strip of tape. "Maybe they're just tryna help."

"They had a funny way of showing it," Bucky adds, his eyes trained on you, a hiss slipping through your lips as you roll down the remaining spandex. You sigh in relief, the ache becoming dull as you shut the case, giving it back to Lemar.

"Better?" John asks, earning a single nod as a response. "I don't think we've properly met. John Walker," he smiles, offering a shake of his hand, but you didn't move, only staring at the outstretched palm in front of you. "Does she talk?" John mumbles suddenly, looking to Sam or Bucky for a reply.

Your eyes cast down, gaze hardening at the sight of the shield in his grasp. Flashes of Steve running through your mind, the many times he'd catch you trying to throw it like he would. Steve Rogers meant a lot to you, having joined him in not signing the Sokovian accords, being an outlaw, and helping to clear Bucky's name with Sam. So, seeing a man who wasn't Steve hold the shield awoke something in you. Something unkind and hateful.

"When she wants to," You claim, John squirms in his seat, sensing the tension as your eyes flicker to his. "And frankly has no desire to speak to you."

"You don't even know me," John defends, glancing at Bucky, a sly smirk on his lips, and Sam, who rendered quiet, his eyes looking elsewhere. John sets his attention back on you, lips razor thin.

You scoff, shaking your head softly as you fold your arms over your chest. "Jonathon F. Walker," You begin, leaning back in your seat, your eyes never leaving his. "Former Captain of the U.S Army's 75th Rangers Regiment. Graduated at the top of your class from the United States Military and the first person in American history to receive three medals of honor, ran RS-one missions in counterterrorism and hostage rescue."

John's tongue darts between his lips, a frown spreading throughout his forehead at the information you were giving him. Either you did research on him or, you just read his file, which you had done both. You were not one to go into a mission without potentially knowing who you were up against. It was better to be safe than sorry.

"So you saw the news?" John chuckles, the frown falling from his features while he shrugs. "Big deal, so did the entire world."

"Custer's Grove High school alumni."

John's smile falters.

"There you met, Lemar Hoskins and your current wife," You tilt your head in curiosity. "Olivia, right? Or am I getting it wrong?"

Clearing his throat softly, John broke eye contact with you. So you did know him, and you probably knew more than you led on. "Do they always just stare like that?" He gestures between you and Bucky, who had displayed the same distaste for him.

Sam glances beside him, observing the matched body language you shared with Bucky, its no wonder Bucky had taken a liking to you, even if he'd never admit it. "You get used to it," Sam smirks, turning his head back to Walker.

"Okay..." John drags, eyes flickering to the more sensible one of the trio, and that was Sam. "Look, that serum doesn't have the greatest track record, no offense," He waves his hand, dismissing the insult directed towards the only super-soldier in the car.

"We need to figure out where they're going. How'd you track 'em here?" Sam asks, "The flag smashers."

"Uh," Lemar murmurs, scratching the back of his head. "We didn't track them. We tracked you through Redwing."

"You hacked my tech!?" Sam gripes, straightening out his back as he sat up.

"Sorry," John laughs, "It's not exactly hacking. It's government property...kind of the government. Alright, you know things have gotten kind of..."

"Chaotic," Lemar adds.

"Yeah," John nods in agreement. "The GRC, they're doing their best to get things up and running smoothly post blip. If you guys teamed up with us-"

"No." Bucky interrupts. He couldn't let Walker finish that sentence.

"I've got mad respect for all of you," Lemar praises, looking between the trio before him. "But you were getting your asses kicked 'til we showed up."

"And who are you?" Bucky bemuses, cocking a brow at the man next to John.

"Lemar Hoskins," You mention, "I could've sworn we've been through this." You shake your head at the old man, for being 106, he couldn't hear a thing.

"I see a guy hanging out of a helicopter in tactical gear," Sam shrugs, "I'm gonna need a lot more than Lemar Hoskins."

"I'm Battlestar, John's partner."

"Battlestar?" Bucky repeats, narrowing his eyes at Lemar as he nods, confirming his alias. "Stop the car!" Bucky shouts suddenly, brakes screeching as the wheels come to a stop in the middle of the road. Bucky pulls open the handle, ducking, as to not rail his head on the bar-frame above him before hopping off the jeep.

"Look, I get it, okay?" John sighs, calling after Bucky. "I get the attitude, I do. You didn't think the shield was gonna end up here. I get it, Bucky. And I'm not trying to be Steve!"

"Good," You interject, rendering John to settle his eyes on you. "Because you will never be. And just because you're the one wielding it..." You grab the bar above your head, using it to pull yourself up. "It doesn't make you Captain America." And with that, you carefully jump off the jeep, following after the heated super-soldier.

Sighing in frustration, he rips his eyes away from your retreating figures. "I'm not trying to replace him either. I'm just trying to be the best Captain America I can be." He explains to Sam, hoping the falcon would cut him some slack. "-And it'd be a whole lot easier if I had Cap's wingman on my side."

Sam's eyes widen in surprise, his tongue darting between his lips. "It's always that last line," He scoffs, shaking his head as he jumped off the car, following you and Bucky.

John's lips thin out, face scrunching in a scowl. "Let's go," He instructs. The sound of the jeep leaving making its way to your ears.

[charliedawn]

Imagine having ran away from the Elven kingdom while being betrothed to Thranduil and returning

" Where is lady Thranduil ?! I must speak with her this instant !"

You shout while making your way to the throne room where you were sure to find Thranduil.

" Oh no..She's back.."

Thranduil pales perceptibly and even shivers at the loud voice, knowing only one fool daring to address him this way.

" Who is it, sir ?!"

One of the counsellors asks while Thranduil closes his eyes and takes a big breath of air before responding with visible disdain.

" The most annoying arrogant little vermin to ever walk this earth.."

Suddenly, the door of the throne room is kicked open and you walk in with a big bright smile.

" Hello, your majesty ! Remember me ?! How is that scar of yours ?! Still healing ?!"

He sighs loudly before ordering the other people present to leave with a slight nod of his head. When everyone is gone, he turns towards you with a fake smile.

" Lady Y/N.. What an unpleasant surprise..!How could I ever forget you ? If I remember correctly, I swore to kill you myself if you ever dared to show your face again ?"

You ignore his barely hidden threat with a dismissive wave of your hand.

" Bah ! Still mad ?! Me who thought you elves were all about forgiveness ?! And, if I remember correctly, I told you that I wouldn't come back to your lovely spooky forest unless death was upon me !"

He nods and smirks before crossing his arms over his chest.

" Well..At least you don't have a problem of memory. You look well enough..How about you see yourself out ?"

You bite your lower lip hesitantly, when he walks past you in order to leave, before turning around and shouting.

" Thranduil ! I'm dying !"

He stops dead in his tracks and turns towards you slowly with a frown.

" What did you say ?"

You sigh before looking up at him with begging eyes.

" I'm..I'm dying, Thranduil..I have been cursed by a very powerful mage. I only have a short time left and I wanted to make amends before I leave..So, please, hear me out.."

He doesn't answer and you take that as an invitation to keep talking.

" I wanted to apologize. All those years ago, I wounded you. But, you have to understand why ?! We were betrothed, while you had just lost your wife..I knew that it was unfair of my family to force an alliance so soon. I wanted to get away, and I knew that they wouldn't let me leave unless I escaped. I didn't think that you would be the one trying to stop me..I didn't know because it was dark and I thought it was a soldier that would get me back if I didn't fight back ! I couldn't have known that it was you ! I wouldn't have fought you."

He sighs before asking you.

" How long ?"

You frown before replying, visibly annoyed.

" Did you hear a word of what I just said ?! Can't you just forgive me so I can finally have peace ?!"

He turns around and walks towards you at lightning speed before yelling.

" No ! I can't ! Now, tell me, how long ?!"

You are startled by his sudden outburst and quickly answer.

" 5 days ! I've got 5 days.."

He visibly clenches his jaw and asks surprisingly calmly.

" Where ? Where did he curse you ?"

When you don't answer, he grabs your wrist and you cry out in pain. He frowns before tearing your sleeve in half and looking at the rotten skin there. He softly touches it with the tip of his fingers and you whimper. He looks up at you with a worried glance before leading you to his throne. He gets out a big book that seems to be as old as the forest itself from underneath the throne and starts flicking through the pages in search for something that could help you.

" Who was that great mage of yours ?"

You hesitate before finally admitting.

" Saruman. I tried to steal something from him.."

Thranduil suddenly looks up at you with a raised eyebrow, urging you to continue with his eyes.

" I..This is why I am here, Thranduil.."

You get out some kind of little blue fial and he rises up from his throne to look at it more closely, tilting his head slightly to observe it with more attention.

" What is it ?"

He finally asks while continuing observing it with attention, tilting his head slightly to the other side. You sigh before admitting.

" A potion of resurrection. He had it in his tour and wanted to use it to resurrect someone..I don't know who. But, when I heard that he had this kind of potion, I sneaked inside his home and stole it. But, before I could get out of there safely, he woke up and cursed me.."

Thranduil growls in annoyance at the lack of results from his search inside the book and also, at your foolishness.

" You fool ! He could have killed you ! Why would you go do something so stupid and reckless ?!"

He asks, visibly upset, and you can only shrug with a sad smile.

" Maybe because I wanted to give you a chance to be happy again ?"

He frowns in incomprehension until you explain.

" It was for your wife. It was for Evranï."

His eyes widen in shock at her name and his eyes keep going back and forth from the small vial to your face, trying to see if you were telling the truth.

" Y/N..Why ? Why do this for me ? Why risk your life for someone that you don't even know..?"

You smile pitifully at him before replying with tears forming at the corner of your eyes.

" Because that's what you do when you're in love, right ? You do everything in your power to make them happy..You may have not known until today but, I fell in love with you, Thranduil..I fell in love with you the moment I first set eyes on you during my first visit to your castle. You may not share my feelings, but it doesn't mean I have to forget about them, right ?"

He was about to answer when you start coughing loudly and cover your mouth with your hand. You then notice the blood and Thranduil seems to notice too since he is standing next to you in a matter of seconds. You fall to your knees and Thranduil is there to catch you.

" Y/N ! You told me 5 days, Y/N ! What's going on ?!"

You smile sadly before confessing.

" I may have lied a little..Saruman told me that I had 5 days to return his vial..four days ago.."

You had never seen the king cry before, it was so hard to imagine his perfect face stained by such vain things as tears..and yet, here he was, crying his eyes out over you. You stroke his cheek lovingly before forcing yourself to smile reassuringly at him.

" Don't cry, my king..This is a happy moment. I finally got the chance to help you and you will soon be able to see your beloved wife again..So, smile for me, okay ?"

You feel the intense pain gaining your heart and tighten your grip on the king's arm unconsciously. He notices and puts his own hand on yours.

" You silly woman..I won't let you die. You still have so much to do, and much more to make amends for, before I can forgive you.."

He softly says and you shake your head, the words feeling like fire every time you utter them.

" Please..Forgive me, my king..I know that I've disappointed you greatly, but please, forgive me so I can leave this world in peace..You can see it as a final act of mercy for a repentent soul ? I give you my life for your wife's..A soul for a soul..I only ask for forgiveness in return.."

You implore him and he looks at the vial that you place in his hand. He then glances back at you with a sad smile, cradling your face and kissing your forehead lovingly.

" I can't forgive you, because there is nothing to forgive..You were afraid and needed someone to believe in you. I’ve let fear and sorrow blind me from my duties towards you. Letting you think that your life had any less value than the one of my deceased wife was my mistake. I should be the one begging for forgiveness, not you. This is why, I can't accept your gift.."

He approaches the vial to your lips and you open your eyes wide at his intent. You close your lips tightly, knowing that if you were to drink it, the queen would never be reborn. He grits his teeths before grabbing your face and pressing his fingers against your cheeks, trying to make you open your mouth, unsuccessfully.

“ I refuse to let you die, Y/N ! Now, drink, you stubborn woman !”

He shouts, but you shake your head and wiggle too much for him to be able to force you to drink the potion with the vial. He finally sighs in, what you thought was, defeat before looking up at the ceiling and whispering.

“ I’m sorry my beloved, but I can't let an innocent girl be the price of my selfishness.”

You frown in incomprehension until you see him drink the potion before pouring it down your throat. You try to push him away, but his lips are sealed to yours and he doesn’t step back until you’ve swallowed every last drop of the potion. Then, and only then, does he step back to look at your arm, making sure that the healing process had begun. He smiles satisfactorily at the skin taking back its original condition.

“ You see ? In a couple of days you’ll be on your feet again.”

He says, but you don't answer and she he looks back at you, he sees that you've blacked out. He smiles before kissing your forehead again.

" Sleep well, my little spitfire."

A couple of days later :

As soon as you are awake, you storm inside the throne room with only one person in mind : Thranduil. When he sees you arrive, he smiles, but unlike his previous thoughts on your reaction when you would eventually wake up, he finds you angry and with tears in your eyes. Before anyone could stop you, you walk towards the king with determination and slap him across the face so hard that the sound resonates around the throne room. His surprise turns into anger and he was about to yell at you for your behavior when he sees that you are crying.

" Why did you do that ?! You kingdom needs a queen !”

He suddenly understands what you are so upset about and before he could answer, you crumble at his feet. You grip the bottom part of his robe and starts sobbing, hiding your face in the piece of cloth. He sighs before forcing you to look at him, grabbing your chin between his thumb and forefinger to look deeply into your teary eyes.

“ You made a mistake.”

You suddenly stand up and yell, obviously offended.

“ Who said it was a mistake ?! I gave you what you always wanted !”

He frowns before standing up as well and glaring back at you.

“ I do say it is a mistake because you made a reckless decision that could have led you to your death ! Your life belongs to me! Don't you dare forget again ! You'll die when I see fit ! You really thought that coming in here and dying on my floor would make me happy ?!"

You open your eyes wide and hold back the tears that were threatening to come back. He regrets his sudden outburst nearly instantly and straightens up to add.

" But, as a queen, you are to learn from your mistakes and make good use of them.."

You grit your teeths before replying confidently.

" I am no queen ! I am a warrior ! I have spilt blood and done things..things that would only bring you down with me. Why want me as a queen ?”

He sighs before turning towards you with a sad smile.

" What makes a queen ? A queen learns to survive, and even if her hands are red with the blood of her enemies, her heart will always be pure, for it beats for her people. A queen can have moments of weaknesses, as any other creature on earth, but she learns from her mistakes. As I have learned from mine. Don't you think I already thought about running away ? Leaving my duties, my son and my kingdom behind ?"

You frown before asking.

" Then why didn't you ?"

His eyes turn grey for a moment and he looks at his thrown before answering truthfully.

" I admit that I was upset at first when my advisors urged me to find a new wife, casting aside the memory of my sweet Evranï. But, having no choice, I had to make a decision. I traveled to every land in order to find that being that would be able to take my love's place on the throne by my side..When I thought that all hope was lost and that I would never find such a person, I found you. I saw you near the weeping willow, as still as a statue and listening to the wind with your eyes closed. I found myself wondering what you were waiting for and sat on the ground until the sun disappeared behind the hills, only then did you move and, to my astonishment, you started dancing with a sword in your hand. Your gestures were so precise and calculated, as if you could slash the wind itself in two. Only a few days later did I finally get an explanation to your particularly odd behavior from one of the villagers, you were training to slay a monster that was killing villagers in your land that nobody had ever seen, but that those who had survived described as fast as the wind. I wanted to laugh at the ridiculous theory, but couldn't bring myself to and decided to wait to see if you would succeed, certain that nobody could slay such a beast. But then, one day, you came in the inn where I was staying with a large victorious smile, covered in blood and carrying the body of the beast on your back that had a wide range of pointy teeths and a very distinctive fur color, one that I had never seen before..Blue with yellow stripes. I remember feeling a sudden wave of pride and respect towards you. Such dedication, patience and strength are what I always thought made a queen. That day, I knew that you would be the only one I would ever accept to rule side by side with.."

You open your eyes wide at the revelation before remembering that there was no weeping willow near the castle and this is when you recall your childhood weeping willow, the one that you used to come to think and imagine what the world would be like outside of your little town. You look up at Thranduil with wide eyes full of admiration, realizing that he had always been one step ahead of you, already knowing you before you even set foot into his kingdom. Thranduil only chuckles at your startled expression.

“ You didn't think I would let some random stranger choose the woman I would be spending the rest of my life with, did you ? Who do you think invited you to the castle in the first place ? You may have chosen me, but I chose you first, my queen..”

He suddenly kneels on one knee in front of you and you blush vividly before hitting his shoulder.

" Get up ! You could have told me ! I thought that you didn't even know my name until I escaped !"

He chuckles again before getting up and leaning in so close that you could stare deep into his beautiful blue eyes. He then proceeds to whisper in the shell of your ear.

" Do not misunderstand. Try to escape again ? And I'll break your legs. Understood, my dear ?"

You shiver at his threat and nod vividly, gulping loudly at his sudden change of demeanor. He smirks at you, satisfied with your answer, before walking towards the exit with the same usual elegance that all elves seem to possess. It takes you a while to react and when you do, you turn around to yell.

" Hey ! Come back here, you tall drama queen wannabe ! I'm not finished with you yet !"

He only laughs before replying with a sing-song voice.

" Welcome home, my queen !"

You huff in annoyance, but can't help smiling at the end. King Thranduil wasn't an easy elf..But, you wouldn't have him any other way. He made you keep going and even if he was harsh in his lessons, you knew that the harsh truth was always better than sugar-coated lies. During your many travels, you had met many different people in many different lands, but none ever compared to the elf king who could be as cold as ice, but also as hot as the sun that shined high in the sky. He always was one step ahead from everyone and even if you were to rule by his side until the end of your life, you would surely never succeed in understanding him.

He suddenly stops in the corridor and turns towards you with a knowing smile.

" Well ? Aren't you coming ?"

You smile and nod before running towards him.

" Thranduil ?"

You would later ask.

" Yes, my queen ?"

He answers before looking down at you while you smile devilishly at him.

" Since I am to become queen, does that mean that I can call you lady Thranduil all I want now ?"

He sighs exasperatedly before rolling his eyes playfully.

" I would rather not, especially in front of my advisors or subjects..but when have you ever taken my opinion into account ?"

You laugh happily before closing your fingers on his hand.

" Who knows ? Maybe I was following your plans from the beginning ?"

He chuckles before smiling mysteriously at you.

" And how did you come to this fascinating conclusion ?"

You look back up at him before replying.

" I just remembered that I was wearing the fur of the beast the night that I escaped..As you said it yourself, of a very "distinctive color", one that nobody could have mistaken.."

He understands and grins at you.

" Looks like I've been exposed..Well played."

You smile widely before winking cheekily at him.

" A queen knows how to learn from her mistakes.."

[mightyavngrs]

don't do that again | poe dameron x reader

summary: a broken promise and a mission gone wrong

warnings: mentions of a panic attack (stay safe <3)

a/n: hope you guys had happy holidays! here's a belated christmas gift :)

masterlist | taglist

You laid silently in your bed, heavy eyes trained on the alarm clock that stood in your nightstand. 1:45, 2:36, 3:18... the time passed and you couldn't help the voice inside your head telling you that every hour gone by the probability of Poe coming back safe and sound lowered.

He was supposed to come back a week ago. Maker, you knew it. You knew this mission wasn't going to go well.

Your legs carried you through the resistance base as you furiously made your way to Poe's quarters. It was late and most people had already retired to their rooms but the few members in the hallways threw confused looks your way. As you got to Poe's room, closed fist ready to bang on his door, the thing opened before you revealing a very excited Poe Dameron whose smile disappeared the second his eyes met yours. You caught his wrist, pushing him back inside the room with you before closing the door.

"Y/n, what happened-"

"Tell me you didn't take that mission." you demanded, your raised voice unrecognizable to your own ears.

"Wait, what? This is the most important mission of my career i thought you'd be happy i-"

"Poe this is the most dangerous mission anyone in the resistance has been assigned in years."

"You think i can't do it? Is that what this is about?" he questioned in shock, failing to keep the disappointed look that formed in his face.

"No! Maker, Poe, you're one of the most skilled people this rebellion has seen but this mission could just be an ambush for all we know! I mean collecting intell in heavy-guarded enemy territory from someone the resistance hasn't even heard about? Do you realize how dangerous that is?"

"Yes, y/n, i do. You know i think you're forgetting i've been a part of this rebellion for far longer than you have." he snapped, voice dangerously low and your eyes couldn't help but widen at the hostility in his words.

"Why are you being so aggressive? I'm just worried about you." you stuttered, trying to hold back the tears already forming in your eyes. Your anger for his stubbornness now fully replaced by concern. "I know this is important to you and you know i wouldn't be saying this if i didn't actually mean it but i have a bad feeling about this mission, Poe. Please stay. Just this once." you practically begged, hand moving to cup his cheek before he harshly brushed it away.

"I think you need to go, y/n."

And with those words you were out the door and on your way back to your room. Although hurt, you weren't too worried about Poe's outburst. You guys had promised each other long ago never to leave for a mission without saying goodbye, even if you were mad at each other. He wouldn't break that promise. "Just needs to cool off." you thought to yourself before allowing yourself to drift off to sleep.

When you woke up the next day it took you a second to process what had happened the night before, but once you did panic filled your senses. You quickly got out of bed, clumsily getting ready before starting to make your way to the hangar, your eyes frantically searching for any sign of Poe or the falcon.

"Hey, y/n! What's wrong?" Rey's voice broke you from your thoughts as the jedi made her way towards you.

"Where's Poe?" the question left your mouth without hesitation and the look that formed on your friend's face told you all you needed to know.

"He left for his mission an hour ago."

"No. He wouldn't just leave without saying goodbye. We promised we wouldn't do that." you muttered feeling Rey's hand on your arm as she gave it a comforting squeeze.

"I'm sorry, y/n."

After hours of staring at the alarm clock you sighed. "No way i'm gonna get any more sleep tonight." you thought to yourself, swinging your legs over the side of your bed after deciding a walk through the hangar would be a much better waste of your time. The hallways were deserted and if all the equipment didn't look so modern you would've thought you were walking through an abandoned resistance base.

Finally arriving to the hangar you started your walk through the area before your eyes landed on a beaten up millennium falcon. You violently shook your head, figuring the sight was just another trick pulled by your tired mind to torture you a bit more, but when the image of the spaceship didn't disappear you felt your blood run cold.

And then you were running through the hangar and towards the beloved ship, quickly punching in the code to open its door and before you could call out for your best friend's name you were met by an obnoxiously loud BB-8. Between the mess that were the noises produced by the small droid you were only able to pick out three words. Ambush. Poe. Shot.

You only had time to scream for BB-8 to go and get help before you were sprinting through the ship. Once you finally arrived to the cockpit your eyes landed on your best friend lying on the ground. You fell to your knees by the pilot's side, releasing a shaky breath once you confirmed he was, in fact, still breathing. Tears were starting to cloud your vision by now, and you felt your chest getting heavier by the second. You tried your hardest not to let the panic settle in. This was most definitely not the time for a panic attack; Poe was injured. He needed you. He needed you applying pressure to whatever blaster wound those bastards had given him but your body was frozen, you couldn't move. You could only stare at your best friend's beaten up face as a pool of blood grew around his body. You don't know how many minutes had passed when you felt someone pull you away from Poe and against their chest startling you in the process.

"Y/n, it's ok. We got him, he's gonna be okay." hands you could now recognize as Finn's were rubbing your arms in an attempt to ground you and bring you back from your state of panic. This wasn't your first panic attack but you usually had Poe there to help. Stars, Poe. He always knew what to do; how to help you, and now you couldn't even help him. You closed your eyes, trying to avoid the sight of his bloodied body being carried away by the medics and finally, after a couple of minutes, you gained enough strength to get on your feet (with Finn's help), and start your walk to the medbay.

7 hours. The longest, most painful 7 hours of your life and you were finally let inside the room. A sweet doctor had come to get you letting you know that, although stable, Poe was still unconscious but she hoped hearing your voice could help him. After a quick nod of reassurance from Finn and a hand squeeze from Rey, who'd met you at the medbay only a few minutes after you'd gotten there yourself, you stepped inside the room.

Poe laid on his hospital bed, face still dirty from the mission he'd barely made it out alive from and a thick bandage on his torso. You closed the door behind you, moving to take a sit next to the pilot. With a sigh you brought your hand up to his hair, brushing the brown curls away from his bloodied face.

"If only you had listened to me just this one time." you mumbled with a sad smile, your hand now moving to hold his. "I'm sorry i couldn't help you. I tried to move but seeing you like that i just- i thought i was going to lose you and i couldn't focus and i-" and then you were choking on your words and there were tears running down your cheeks again and you couldn't believe you were this pathetic because if you couldn't even help your dying best friend then what the hell were you good for. Then you felt a squeeze in your hand.

"Please don't cry." Poe's tired voice filled the room and you couldn't help but do the exact opposite, lifting your teary eyes to meet his own.

"Poe." you were barely able to mutter out before you were engulfing him in a hug. The pilot ignored the pain in his abdomen, focusing instead on how warm your embrace felt and on how happy he was to be back in your arms. His favourite place in the galaxy. "I thought i'd lost you." you confessed just above a whisper, and he hated that he could hear how mortified you were in your voice. He hated that the tears now staining his shirt were a result of his stubbornness and most of all he hated himself for breaking your spirit like this.

"I'm so sorry, sweetheart." he muttered into your hair, trying his best to hold you as tightly as the pain would allow it. "You were worried and i snapped at you and then i left without saying goodbye and you were right about the whole thing. It was an ambush. Maker, y/n, i'm so sorry." he kept apologizing while rubbing your back, trying to bring you as much comfort as he possibly could. But you shook your head no before attempting to reassure him.

"You had no way of knowing. It wasn't your fault Poe just- don't do that again ok? Please don't ever leave without saying goodbye again..."

"I won't. I promise."

Poe had always found amusement in complaining about the resistance beds but now, as his bare back laid in fresh sheets for the first time in weeks, he couldn't help but sigh in content.

"Alright! You're all bandaged up." you exclaimed happily, putting away the gauze you'd been given before laying down next to the pilot. It'd been a few days since the incident and the doctors had released Poe from the medbay as long as he promised he'd change his bandage daily, job you'd gladly taken. "How're you feeling?"

"I'm happy i'm alive." he replied with a smile, staring at the ceiling above, but something about his tone of voice and the slight frown still visible in his features threw you off.

"You know you can tell me anything right?" you asked softly, bringing your hand up to caress his face when he flinched at your touch. "Look at me, Poe. Please." And then his eyes were on yours. You were used to hearing the fear in the pilot's voice, no matter how much he tried to hide it through his comlink you could always sense it but this... you'd never actually seen fear in his eyes like this. He was still terrified. Terrified that he wouldn't come back home one day. That he wouldn't come back to you.

"Hey, you'll always come back home." you assured him, and you sounded so confident in your statement, so faithful that, just for a moment, he allowed himself to believe your words. "You'll always come back home because you're the best pilot in the resistance, Poe Dameron. You'll always come back home because this rebellion needs you. I need you, ok?"

Poe swallowed the lump that'd formed in his throat. "Say that again." he pleaded and Stars you could never say no to him.

"I need you, Poe. I can't do this without you." Your fingers were tracing his skin in an attempt to get him out of his head. To get him to calm down so he would finally get some proper rest. But then he was scooting closer to you, resting his forehead against yours.

"I love you." the words left your mouth before you could stop them. You pulled away from the pilot, eyes widened in fear of the rejection you knew was to come but Poe's hands found your face and pulled it towards him closing the space between you. Your eyes fluttered shut and you ignored the tear you felt running down your face as they did so. It felt right. His lips on yours that is. And when you finally had to break the kiss for air he pulled you gently into his arms. "I love you. And i really can't do this without you either."

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a/n: i'm so excited to finally post this! i've had this idea for a year now but my first attempt at writing it went so bad i gave up haha i think i've gotten a lot better ever since so hopefully you guys enjoyed! don't forget to leave feedback if you'd like and treat people with kindness <3

taglist: @buckysbeloved @justanotherblonde23 @lbuprofiend @etherealsanakin

[serenityseventeen]

Love & Letter: To The Thirteen Boys I've Loved Before

The Second Letter

----------------

To: Yoon Jeonghan

From: Y/N

Dear Jeonghan,

I hope everything's going well with you, wherever you are. I'm writing you a letter without knowing where you are so even if I did ever decide to send this letter, I wouldn't know where to mail it.

Are you doing well? Why don't you call me? Contact me somehow? Why don't you say something to me? Don't you have anything you want to say to me? Oh right, you don't have my number. I don't know any of your social media accounts and you don't know any of mine. I can search on Facebook for you, through a thousand different “Yoon Jeonghan” profiles, but what would be the point?

Actually, I'm angry with you. I'm really angry and I'm a bit heartbroken too because you just took my heart and left.

Why didn't you tell me beforehand?

I waited for you to return. I spent the rest of my freshman year waiting and I even waited through my summer break, hoping that maybe you'd come back or send a letter. School starts in a month and you still aren't here. I don't know what I feel toward you anymore because you're gone. Do I love you since I'm angry at you like this?

From the first day we met, I could tell we didn't match. I don't even know why you pursued me. You joined the basketball team and whenever you had games, you wanted me to come to watch. I didn't know why so I refused the first few games.

We had many classes together, you know that. Did you use the advantage of being in the same classes as me to try to get to know me? What were your intentions when you asked me if I had lunch? Why did you always ask my friends if I was eating well?

I have so many questions I'm dying to ask now that you're gone. One day you were laughing, joking with me while I watched you practice basketball and the next day you suddenly disappeared. One day of absence turned into months, then half a year. I didn't want to ask but I was dying to know.

Then, the answer finally came.

You moved?

Why didn't you tell me anything?

I thought we were developing something special, was that only me? I thought that you liked me, that's why you did so many things to me, making my heart race and pound. Am I wrong?

If I am wrong, why did you do it?

Maybe I'm completely getting the wrong idea and the sudden move wasn't your fault. I bet that it wasn't your fault. I'm just angry that you didn't inform me. Not everyone moves houses in one day, it takes a lot of planning, doesn't it?

Now I'm just left here, confused.

Now I'm just left here, reminiscing about my second love that disappeared. I'm still remembering the first day we met when you bumped into me at the stairs and held me to keep me from falling backward.

Jeonghan, just, where did you go?

I know this message will never reach you anyway, anyhow, so I'll tell you this much.

Because of you, I changed. Hanging out around a mischievous guy like you made me pick up your habits. Before I knew it, I was playing small pranks on my dad and enjoying it, just like when you and I teamed up to prank the gym teacher into thinking that he had sat on a freshly painted bench. I can still remember how long I laughed because of it.

I still have the pen that you forgot when you were here to study with me. My father constantly asks me where you are and I always reply that I don't know because I don't know.

You came by twice every week for three months because you wanted me to tutor you. I don't know if I became a sheep to you but even though I knew you were gifted intelligent, I tutored you anyway. Jeonghan, you were one of those people who didn't need to study to ace a test. Even your methods of trickery are intelligent.

So as I reminisce, I also wonder why you would do something like that if you didn't like me. You were the one who told me that all men act like this, wanting to be around someone, making up excuses to stay close, and doing things they won't normally do if they like someone. Was that all a trick, Jeonghan?

Not only did you study with me but you studied the times that my dad was gone and came by when he wasn't here. You were respectful toward my dad and kind too, so I wondered how you could have such a naughty nature but at the same time be so caring.

It was one of those days when my dad went to work that you came over. Look, I was so confused that's why I kept stuttering. I knew that you weren't supposed to be at my house at that time of night so we stayed on the porch, gazing at the fallen sky. What were you thinking about? You stared for a long time and didn't say a word. It was the middle of winter too and you came by with your hands tucked in your puffy black jacket with your nose cutely red. You remember this night, don't you? If you don't, I'd go even more nuts than I did.

Why did you kiss me that night?

I mean, we weren't even talking, just gazing at the sky where stars were barely visible. Then all of a sudden, you said, “Look at me.”

I turned to you and then all of a sudden, you kissed me. I honestly didn't expect to get a kiss this early in my life and for it to be from you, the second love who disappeared, I can't be any more disappointed.

Jeonghan, the thief.

Your lips were cold at first but then they grew warm. I'm also sorry if I didn't know how to kiss. I just went with the flow and followed the way your thin lips moved against mine. Your hand also touched my neck as you kissed me, I could still feel the warmth of it lingering on my skin.

After you left that night after kissing me quietly, making my heart burn in the cold night, you stroked my hair. I ran inside my room and rolled on my bed, wanting to scream on my bedsheets because my lips have finally been pressed against another man. A boy that I liked at that.

How about you?

Do you think about that night at all?

It was about two days before you moved away.

Strangely, the next days, you continued to talk to me as if you didn't kiss me the days before. I was confused but since I was naive, I just believed that's how it went for everybody.

Also, because of that kiss, I began to notice your gaze. Maybe I could have noticed something in those two days before your departure. I just remember seeing you gazing at me with different eyes. I want to believe that you had fallen for me, but because of you, I'm being delusional like this.

The only way to know is when you finally decide to speak it true somewhere and it reaches me.

In this letter to you, I just can't help expressing the emotions I'm feeling. I have nowhere else to rant and I need you to know about my feelings though you'll never receive this letter.

Gosh, writing this letter makes me remember the weekend that you took me biking on a couple bicycle. Why did you ask me to go with you when you were leaving the next day? It's not like you at all. Knowing you for those short six months, you would have just told me with a pitiful face, “I'm going to move.”

Instead, you kissed me and decided to take me biking. I can still remember that grin on your face when you came to my house and said, “Hop on, Y/N.”

The wind that hit my face that day was amazing and my heart was racing just to have my hands around your waist.

Because of you, I became rebellious for the first time. I never disobeyed my father. He told me to go buy groceries that day and I went on a bike ride with you, enjoying the chilly winter breeze and ditching groceries. When we arrived at the basketball court, I watched and played a bit of basketball with you. Do you know what that means, Jeonghan?

Were you aware this whole time of my feelings? I know you can read other people's expressions well.

I can't understand you, Jeonghan. I don't think I ever will unless you come back and tell me.

I won't believe what any of your friends say even if it's the only source I have. ‘You moved away because a different high school was giving you bigger opportunities’, how am I supposed to believe that? In the middle of the school year?

Now, all I can do is sigh.

I won't wait for you anymore. That's why I'm just going to leave it. I loved you. Now, you're just one of the boys I've loved. I'm not going to spend the rest of my summer waiting to find a needle in a haystack.

I'll remember how I loved you. I'll remember how you changed me. I'll remember how loving you changed me.

I'll wonder sometimes about what we could have been if you didn't leave. If you didn't leave, I think I would have still been in love with you. Now, I'm pretty sure I would still be in love with you, at least for a little longer.

Please, send me a letter.

I know the chances are low.

I'm still angry at you for not telling me. If you did like me and think you did it for our own good, you're wrong. At least I wouldn't have had to wait and worry for the weeks that you disappeared that your life's clock stopped ticking. If you did tell me beforehand, I would have known that you'd be fine and that you were just moving away.

Did you have no faith in us?

Or did you really find a better opportunity in a better high school somewhere far away?

I'm still angry.

Is this what you call ‘the one that got away’?

Anyway, I don't love you now, but if you come back, I might again. I can't make up my mind.

I miss you, Jeonghan.

Sincerely,

Y/N

-------------------

© serenityseventeen

6/18/21 - 9:51 pm

a/n: SEVENTEEN back on Instagram?? Seungcheol, Minghao, Vernon, Joshua, and Seungkwan posted today/yesterday. I didn't even notice WOOZI changed his profile picture. Also, I find Seungkwan and Seungcheol so funny...

SC: you are my escape

SK: you are my s.coups

But yay? Seventeen is back on Instagram!

[syuga-s]

The Last Time

w.c 4.3k

pairing. Jooheon x gn!reader

genre. angst, a little fluff maybe, idk how to classify it but it's my take on relationships in real life(?)

a/n. (warnings) I throw some curses here and there, mention of the word "sex" once, tried to make it as gender-neutral as possible, I could really use some help about t/w, feedback is more than welcome, hope you like the fic 🧍‍♀️

Once again you were at the same bar. With the same friends. Same music. Same drinks. It's safe to say that nothing's changed in here but you.

For some reason, you were awfully quiet tonight. Everyone was away from the table by now. All of them talking and dancing in groups.

You were regretting saying yes to going out the very moment Jasmine was at your front door. But your best friend really wanted to get you out of your house.

The thing is you weren’t going to be alone, all of your friends were tagging along. I guess I need to suck it up, maybe I could have fun, despite him.

And you really tried, there was no need to make a scene anymore. All of your friends have had their fair share of nights seeing you 'talk' with him and making things awkward for everyone. It's been a while, though. You haven't seen him in exactly 2 years.

How do I explain this? There's no resentment anymore, no hate for what happened between you. But when there's a choice between spending your Friday night at the same place as him or staying at home? Well...

But tonight was clearly different. Something (Jasmine) had dragged you here and to be quite honest, it hasn’t been half bad yet. Jasmine kept waiting for you to get up from your chair to come and chat with Jackson and Changkyun. Her all-time crush and his best friend.

"In a sec!! Just let me finish this drink!" You said while you showed her your glass. She quickly nodded and turned to keep talking with those two. You have to remember to thank them later for keeping her entertained because if it weren't for them cracking jokes every single second, she wouldn't have let you off the hook that easily.

Meanwhile, you decided to get a little lost in your head. Laughing to yourself because you were feeling like having a main character moment. Being the only one sat down in a place full of people. The mysterious persona drinking by themselves.

But that didn't last long.

"Mind if I sit here?" You shook your head. He put his drink next to yours and asked, "How are you?" And it somehow felt like you couldn’t have avoided this exact situation.

You released a breath that you didn't even know you were holding. "I'm sitting Jooheon, drinking… existing, you?" He forced himself to smile. Trying to hide the fact that he was still feeling uneasy around you. Nonetheless, showing you the dimples that you used to love so much.

“I can see that”, he paused, "it's been a lot since I last saw you, you look different".

You hummed softly, finally making eye contact with him. "So you expected for me to look the same?" You surely weren't going to pass up the opportunity to be passive-aggressive to him.

It still makes you happy to know that he has never minded this side of you.

"I'm teasing, I guess we both look different, it's been what? Two years?"

"I'm not sure, but it feels like a lot" He took a sip of his drink and started to fidget with the glass. Maybe you're not the only one that's changed after all.

In the two years, you were together, you never saw him like this. But let's remember the fact that you never fully knew him back then. It just feels weird to see him this anxious. Especially with you.

"I've wanted to reach out to you for a while now," You frowned at his words. "Guess I lacked a little courage" He let out an airy laugh. "I really want to talk to you".

Now it was your turn to feel tense. What is this supposed to mean? How long has he been wanting to talk? And talk about what?

You tilted your head and opened your mouth to ask him all this, but he didn't give you the chance to get the words out.

"Before you say something, please believe me I just wanna talk", "but not in here”.

"Alright then, where do you suggest we ‘talk’ Jooheon?” He took his phone out to check the time. 10:44 p.m. He pursed his lips and said, more like hesitating, "I could walk you home?"

You stared off into your group of friends. This was going to make their night interesting. Seeing you two go together again, just like all those times before.

Jooheon's been waiting for this since he saw on your social media that you were leaving the city. And Jasmine took care of letting him know that you would be coming back in about 6 months.

That was a year ago. More than 365 days waiting to be in the same room with you. Praying that you would let him talk to you. Not that you would reject him. But he was scared, he was perfectly aware he messed up everything.

As you were both saying goodbyes to your friends, you started to think about how everything had ended between you two.

You know what? Yes, maybe I was wrong in ghosting him but after all, I don't owe him anything. Just like he threw me out of his life two years ago. We didn't work out, he never communicated with me. He didn't choose me back. I just had to watch him get rid of me, no explanations, no nothing. And I find it really hard to believe that he's been dying to talk to me. What could be so important that he wants to have a proper conversation? How will I explain to him that I stopped replying for no particular reason? That I just realized that we weren't good together, and I had to let go of him? Should I tell him that no matter my hard feelings, I still thought about him constantly?

You had left each other in the cold back then.

He called your name, and you snapped back to reality. Didn't even realize you were already outside of the bar when he softly asked you, "aren't you cold?"

You smirked and told him "Well yeah, walking back home in this weather wasn't in my plans dummy, but I didn't bring a jacket though".

He used to be so attentive to you. One of the other things you used to love about him. Always concerned about you.

He simply put his jacket around you and started walking before you could complain about something as simple as this. Like you always did.

It feels nice to know that someone in this world knows you to this extent. The way you’ll react to simple things. How can you still love someone despite knowing that you don’t work together?

You realized he still has this jacket. It's the same one he gave me the first night we spent together. Why do I have to remember this now? Not fair. Maybe he wore it on purpose.

You gave a little run to catch him. Now that you were by his side, you were getting impatient, "Can you please start talking? I'm intrigued by all your seriousness".

You were kind of hating this feeling. Everything about him felt familiar. Suddenly, you wanted to cling your arm to his but thought twice about it.

He chuckled. "Well it's not super serious, I want us to have a nice conversation, you know?" You snorted at this, what does a nice talk mean?

"I can be nice, as long as you tell me WHAT you wanna talk about…", "come on Jooheon, just get to the point".

"Okay!! OKAY… I-" he took a deep breath and continued, "First of all, I want to apologize to you for everything, then I want us to talk about what happened between us if that's okay with you?"

You'd be lying if you didn't say that you wanted this to happen since you drew apart the first time. You always dreamt of having an adult conversation with him.

But the dream left your mind bit by bit. Just like your heart got itself back together after he left you, piece by piece.

Overwhelmed, you could only stare straight ahead into the street. He called your name again. Now your eyes were on his, and you could see his concerns. How his mind was going miles per hour, just like yours.

"I want to apologize too,” you smiled and finally let yourself link arms with him. “It’s gonna take us a while, isn’t it?”.

The walk to your apartment took around 15 minutes. The words you exchanged with Jooheon were kept to a minimum. You weren’t gonna get into the heavy stuff right there in the street.

When you finally arrived, you gave him back his jacket. It was gonna get uncomfortable to talk with him with a piece of clothing that made you remember too much.

“Want something to drink? I have a beer, wine, you name it”. He sat on your couch while you searched for something non-alcoholic in your little fridge. “A beer would be okay”.

You got yourself some water. Otherwise, your head would be fuzzy, and wouldn’t be able to tell him all you’ve had on your mind for years.

You handed him the bottle, and you took your seat on the carpet. Your mind wandered off to the last time he was in here.

When he told you goodnight and planted a soft kiss on your lips like he always did. You knew it wasn’t a simple ‘good night’, for you.

You remembered how your eyes followed him until he closed the door of your apartment.

He took a swig of his drink and by the time he put the bottle on your little coffee table, it made you realize he was sitting right there, in front of you.

Finally, gathering the courage to start telling you what was on his mind. “I never thought I’d get the chance to talk to you again”.

I didn’t think so, either. We both fucked up multiple times.

──────────────────────

You were never a couple. After 5 years, you never understood what had lacked between you. The desire was there. Now and then you had your moments of happiness. Usually on the weekends.

When you met, you weren’t looking for love or a serious relationship. At least one of you.

Jooheon was free, like the wind or like a bird. He flew back and forth and once in a while he needed to land somewhere for a while. Every so often he sought another fire, another bed, other arms that weren’t yours.

The time came when he made you feel a million things inside. Overwhelmed with words and emotions, mostly love. But also turmoil and maybe desperation.

It made you happy that he made you feel so much after being empty for months. You felt different with him. It was the kind of love you didn’t know you had in you. Didn’t even think it was possible to express about someone like this. Until him.

You didn’t need anyone else. You just needed Jooheon. Not only that, but you didn’t care for how long your love would last because you believed that the meaning of the word love was what you had built together.

A few hours together. Every so often the whole night.

But when the morning came, the nightmare started to take form. Texts at inappropriate hours, and even unanswered messages.

You started thinking that you didn’t know better. You started feeling insecure. Replaceable. Maybe he knows better than to be with me.

Desperate to know what you had. But afraid that you would ruin everything with the words “What are we?”.

Tried to convince yourself that all of this was okay. That it was a good thing that you were going slow, giving him the chance to open up to you.

Months kept passing and your trust in him was running thin. He made you feel weird on the daily. Wondering if he was seeing someone else. If he danced with someone tonight. Had they kissed? Is he having sex with someone who isn’t me? What if he’s tired of me?

You wanted to be with him, but It was starting to hurt.

I hate that when I try to get myself to think that I don’t like you anymore… you do these little things that make me love you.

When you were together, he treated you like there was no one else for him. His hand was always wrapped up in yours. Talking until dawn, about college, his family, and your relationship. Those times, you couldn’t lie to yourself about your feelings.

He was the only face you could see in the world. The only guy you’ve ever wanted to keep around. But how did we get to this point?

The day you told him you were starting to fall in love with him, all he could reply was, “I don’t know what to say, I never thought you would be in love with me”.

“That’s all you have to say?”

“Well what do you want me to say? You took me by surprise”.

“You could tell me how you feel. I’m not expecting for you to tell me you love me back, I-“

There’s no return now, you have to keep talking.

“I’m just tired of not knowing what’s in your head, I’m not sure if you want to have something with me anymore, it’s okay if you don’t so, just be honest with me”.

“I like you”. You stayed quiet after hearing this, urging him to tell you more than just three words.

“I mean, of course, I’m attracted to you”.

At that moment, you liked what you heard. But the more you thought about it, you realized that he didn’t actually care for you, or loved you. Maybe that was a greedy thought from you. Maybe you expected too much.

You were angry but mostly angry at yourself.

Why are you still waiting for him? It's been years and nothing has happened between you. Nothing ever will at this point.

You ended up telling him not to bother you again, that if this was his way of ‘loving’ you, you were better off without it.

But that was a lie, you longed for your phone to show his name, even if it was at 5 A.M. Still thinking that there was no other way to love someone.

Unable to put an end to it, months kept passing and nothing changed between you. Jooheon had many others, and you only had him.

You loved spending nights like this by his side, watching him sleep, wondering for hours about you two. Unable to explain how you could love him this much.

Maybe he did love you, but you can’t handle this kind of love anymore. It’s better for both of you to end this, whatever it was because it's driving you crazy. And you meant it this time.

Jooheon told you goodnight and planted a soft kiss on your lips like he always did.

You knew it wasn’t a simple ‘good night’ for you, this was the last time you were gonna let him in. Your eyes followed him until he closed the door of your apartment. Fighting back your tears while softly saying to yourself, “I’m always going to love you…”.

The texts at 5 A.M. came again, but this time there was no answer. Jooheon started calling and sending texts for days, but you didn’t reply. All your efforts in disappearing from him on social media weren’t stopping him.

He met someone else, yet the texts wouldn’t stop. Until one day they did.

Now and then your curiosity would get the best of you and you would see his Instagram stories with her. An older girl you had met once. They were supposed to be friends.

You wanted to avoid comparing yourself to her but, he never posted something with you. It’s a dumb thing to worry about, but it’s one of those things that sometimes matter.

You tried to understand the whole situation. Accept the fact that you two weren’t meant to be. That he didn’t see a future with you.

Your days stopped revolving around him. You focused your time on getting your degree, learning another language, going out with your friends. Even tried meeting new people.

There were a few here and there. No one was enough for you.

Your ideas of love and relationships were different now. You gave another meaning to the word love. You wanted to find someone who would love you and take care of you. A quiet kind of love, real love.

What you had with Jooheon, was something you never wanted to experience again. Days went by, even months until you saw each other once more; for the first time in Jooheon’s life, he felt a knot in his stomach, he knew he lost you, for good this time.

Months passed and Jooheon left his girlfriend. He now felt different because he looked for you in everyone, yet he couldn’t find you, and he felt empty.

He cursed himself a thousand times for not knowing how to appreciate you and the love you gave him for two whole years. Tears finally fell from his eyes, he couldn’t believe he was crying for someone, crying for love, crying for you.

He took his phone out, swallowed hard, and started typing another text.

“I miss you, and I need you with me now and always, I never thought I would say this, but I’m not happy without you. Maybe I should’ve loved you less and loved you better, I just want you to know that I’ll always be waiting for you my sweet y/n…”

But the message was never delivered. You had changed your number.

It made sense that you would do that someday. It’s been too long, but this didn’t stop him from sending you texts in the middle of the night. When he felt the overwhelming need to have his arms wrapped around you.

──────────────────────

I still love you

(9:05 p.m.)

no, I don’t

(9:06 p.m.)

I’m confused why did this happen

(2:26 a.m.)

I want you to be happy, if this is what it takes then I’m okay with it. be happy. for me. please.

(10:45 a.m.)

I kind of hate you for changing your number

(8:57 p.m.)

I’m sorry

(1:43 a.m.)

maybe if I wasn’t so fucked up this wouldn’t have happened

(3:37 a.m.)

why can’t things be like they were before

(10:13 a.m.)

please come back to me. I need you. You need me

(1:58 a.m.)

I still want you

(4:06 a.m.)

──────────────────────

The day you left town was the day he swore to himself to try his best to get another chance to talk to you, just once more. To make things right, not caring anymore about his pride. He just wanted to let you know everything he didn’t say when you were by his side.

That he was sorry that it took him too long to acknowledge he was wrong. That he knew he was a little too late and wishes that he could say something more meaningful than a simple “I want you back”.

──────────────────────

“I wonder why” You smirked at him.

The more you kept making eye contact, the more you realized you didn’t feel any kind of resentment anymore. You both had grown, and while you didn’t actually need this kind of closure, you figured this was the healthiest moment to do so.

His eyes were avoiding you now, his smile was still there, but you could tell he lost a bit of his confidence. “Okay, so I’m gonna talk first, please just hear me out. I want to rip the band-aid,” He said with a forced laugh.

“I don’t know why I could never tell you that love scares me. That it scares me to be attached to someone”. His tone was soft now.

“I still play in my head the day you told me you were falling in love with me. I couldn’t bring myself to tell you not to tell me those things because you could have changed your mind any moment”.

“I never told you how I felt one of the many nights you spent with me. You were stroking my hair and I seriously felt like crying because I was fucking scared”.

“I was scared to lose you”.

“I’m sorry because I know I made you think I didn’t want you for something serious. I’m sorry for being immature”.

“I look at you now, and I’m happy to get to see you like this. You’re still everything I’ve ever wished for and more. You need to know that nothing compares to you”.

“And believe me, I don’t expect you to take my words as a way of asking you for another chance, I know I don’t deserve it… but I would really love it if you could let me show you I could love you better this time”.

You never imagined these words coming out of his mouth. Couldn’t believe how he was looking at you. Hopeful but understanding at your loss for words.

“Can I ask you one last thing?” His voice was barely audible, but you nodded at him.

“Well, maybe it’s not an actual question, but I’d like to know why you stopped talking to me”.

“Look Jooheon, I don’t know how everything I wanna say will come out, so please bear with me”.

You didn’t know where to start, either.

There were so many things to be said that you were getting nervous to start talking. Because once you opened your mouth, you didn’t know if you would be able to piece everything together.

“When everything ended I really wanted to hate you, everyone around me hated you,” you admitted to him, “except for me and I hated that”.

“I knew that all I could be able to do was cut you from my life, so I just decided to stop talking to you”.

It may sound harsh, but it’s the truth. “I admit it was a poor way of handling things, and I’m sorry for that”.

You’ve always been scared of having this type of conversation.

You let out a sigh because you never thought that the following words were gonna come out of your mouth, ever.

“I’ve only been in love once in my life, and that was when I was with you”.

“It used to frustrate me that I wasn’t able to make it work with anyone after you. I couldn’t help but compare everyone to you”.

“I swore to myself that I never wanted to go through the same thing we had, maybe because those memories are yours and I don't want anyone else messing that up, you made me feel so safe, I felt alive with you, nothing could stop me when I had you”. 

“You've been the only one I've ever wanted to see every day, no matter the hour or how busy I was, I truly wanted everything with you”.

You hadn’t noticed how he had been looking at you this entire time. He couldn’t believe that you used to feel that way about him. Still couldn’t wrap his head around hearing you say how you loved him.

You quickly wiped a tiny little tear that escaped your eye, hoping we wouldn’t notice. But he did.

You let out a nervous laugh and said, “I’m not sad, I swear, It’s just that I never thought I would say all this out loud, especially to you”.

“You don't know how many times I wanted to call you, run to you”.

“Last year before I left I wanted to see you, I kept trying to convince myself that It didn't have to mean anything, that I was just desperate for any physical touch, but from time to time, I wonder if what I really needed was just you”.

He didn’t say anything. So you just said his name out loud. “Jooheon…” Followed by a long pause.

“I feel so different now”.

“When I was far away from you, I realized that I need someone who isn’t absent when it comes to me, someone that isn’t a ghost in my life”.

While you were talking, you were watching his every move and how he couldn’t stop playing with his rings. You’re still not used to seeing him act like this.

“At this point, I want someone who will take care of me, that makes me feel safe. Someone who wants to be with me because they love me, and they love to have me next to them. I’m beyond only spending the night over, I want whole days”.

You finally got up from the floor and sat next to Jooheon. Facing him, making him do the same. He kept looking at you for a whole minute but it felt like hours.

You didn’t know what to do after his following words.

“What I realized with being away from you is that I was pushing away what I’ve always wanted. I wasn’t confident that I could meet you where you were. I felt it would be better not to waste your time back then, but that was then, and this is now…”

You kept looking at each other a little too long. Both realizing you didn't need words anymore. The love was still there.

[mortimer-writes-sometimes]

Alrighty, so this is an idea I've been having about the bartender for a while: if you remember sans' workshop, I actually thought about the idea of sans being gone, and grillby finding the key and beginning to explore the skeletons' past.

Just a random idea, and I also love how you write your stories, I can literally imagine the scenario happening❤.

Oh, I really like this one! I hope you don’t mind that I went in the angst direction with this. It turned out to be a little long and might not have been exactly what you were looking for, but I hope you like it anyway! Also thank you so much for the compliment, I’m thrilled that you can enjoy it.

I Never Knew You. I Never Will.

Word count: 2951 Warnings: Genocide route and all that entails Summary: Grillby can’t find Sans after the evacuation. When he finds himself in Sans’s lab, his world comes crashing down around him.

Preface: This takes place near the end of a genocide run. The remaining monsters have been evacuated to the True Lab by Dr. Alphys. Determined to avenge his brother, Sans left the safety of the lab to judge Frisk.

Grillby felt like he was floating as he made his way through the crowd of monsters around him. This had to be a nightmare. It couldn’t be real. He watched from outside himself as he searched the crowd for familiar faces, stumbling as he was pushed aside by a monster rushing to greet their spouse. People were calling out for each other, sobbing as they found their family members or wailing as they realized their children hadn’t made it. It couldn’t be real.

It couldn’t be.

He couldn’t see any of the Snowdin guards. Where were they?

No, he couldn’t understand, this wasn’t real.

He couldn’t find his niece. He heard someone screaming her name above the crowd and realized it was him. Where was she? Where were Grillby’s brothers, his parents? He hadn’t seen them in so long. They had to be okay.

It wasn’t real.

It couldn’t be real.

It was.

Reality came crashing down. Grillby snapped back into awareness and choked, sickened by the lingering smell of dust as sheer panic gripped him. His friends were dead. His family was dead. They’d been fine just yesterday, how could they be dead? What kind of monster- no, what thing could do this? He struggled to breathe as he felt his whole body seizing up. It was all he could do not to puke, head spinning as he leaned against the nearest wall. He couldn’t breathe, his vision was spotty, was he dying? Was this what it felt like, for your soul to break apart?

Grillby sank to his knees, trails of steam pouring from the corners of his eyes as he sobbed. Everyone he loved was dead.

No. Wait. He was forgetting someone.

Where was Sans?

The fire elemental jerked his head up, frantically scanning the crowd. Sans had been the one to come for him and tell him to evacuate to Hotland. He’d taken Grillby’s hand and told him there was no time to explain. They’d taken a shortcut to Alphys’s lab, skipping Waterfall to be sure Grillby wouldn’t get hurt by the rivers and rain. Sans told him a human was attacking every monster in sight. He told him to stay put, then left to help with the rest of the evacuation. It had only been after the fact that Grillby realized Sans had been wearing Papyrus’s scarf, and it was covered in dust.

Alphys’s underground lab had quickly filled with frightened monsters. The remaining members of the royal guard had spread the word and were getting people out as fast as they could. Sans could only take one person at a time using his shortcuts, but he still managed to get dozens of people out. Despite it all, they weren’t fast enough. The human was destroying everything in its path. They got to Waterfall, Hotland, and the Core faster than everyone could get out. Survivors started showing up covered in lingering dust.

Grillby forced himself to his feet. Sans had to be nearby. All the survivors had been moved to safety, hidden underground. There was no reason for Sans to still be searching. There was no reason for him to be anywhere but by Grillby’s side, safe and sound. Where was he?

The bartender spotted Alphys handing out blankets and walked over, desperation gripping his soul as he stepped in front of her. “Dr. Alphys, have you seen Sans anywhere? He was helping with the evacuation. He should be back by now.”

Alphys stopped in her tracks. “H-he isn’t here?” She looked around, nearly as worried by the news as Grillby. “He s-said he was taking a- a shortcut home. He was o-o-only going to grab some- some more blankets and food.”

Dread enveloped Grillby’s soul, threatening to break it. No. No, this couldn’t be happening. “Why would you let him go back out there?!”

“The h-human is, um, in New Home,” Alphys stuttered out in her defense. “Sans c-c-can teleport. He doesn’t h-have to get, um, anywhere n-near the human. It should b-b-be safe by now. I’m sure, um, h-he’s probably safe. He’ll be back any moment now! I’m s-sure of it!”

She didn’t sound sure enough for Grillby’s taste. He pushed past her, continuing his search as he went from room to room. Sans should have been back. What if he’d exhausted himself and couldn’t teleport again? What if the human doubled back, searching for survivors, and found Sans?

A flash of red caught Grillby’s eye. A long piece of red fabric was left draped on one of the medical beds. Papyrus’s scarf.

Grillby pulled out his phone, shakily picking the dusty scarf up. Surely Sans had his phone on him, right? The phone rang… and rang… and rang… 

“Congrats, you’ve reached the voicemail of Sans the skeleton. Picking up the phone is too much work right now, so I probably won’t answer if you call me back. You can leave a message, but I probably won’t check my voicemail either. Just text me. Or call Papyrus. See ya.”

The fire monster wanted to cry. He called again and again and again. It went to voicemail every time. He tried texting him, begging Sans to answer…

But nobody came.

Grillby was moving towards the elevator of the lab before he truly comprehended what he was doing. Alphys saw him and rushed after him, grabbing his sleeve. “W-wait! Where are you going?”

“You said Sans was at home, didn’t you?” Grillby answered quietly. “I’m going to find him.”

“You c-can’t! It’s not safe-!”

Grillby turned around, his flames burning hotter as he snapped at her. “But it was safe for Sans to leave, was it?! Don’t be so hypocritical! If you’re truly concerned about the safety of monsters, let me go!”

Alphys fell quiet, trembling a bit. She let go of Grillby’s sleeve and hunched over. She hated being yelled at. Grillby immediately felt guilty, taking a deep breath. “I’m sorry,” he said softly, “I shouldn’t have raised my voice. I just-”

“N-no.” Alphys wiped at her eyes and adjusted her glasses. “You’re right. I sh-shouldn’t have let Sans go. Let, um, let me find a r-rain jacket for you. It will be dangerous for y-you to get through- through Waterfall on your own.”

Grillby was quiet for a moment, then just nodded, letting her leave. She came back moments later with a rain jacket, rubber boots, and an umbrella. The fire monster took them and thanked the scientist, heading towards the elevator. He didn’t say goodbye. In the situation they’d found themselves in, a farewell felt like a curse.

Grillby managed to make it through Waterfall mostly unscathed, folding his umbrella as he walked into Snowdin. The place felt like a ghost town, every window dark and every home abandoned. He tried not to think about it as he approached the skeleton brothers’ house. The door was standing open, filling Grillby with dread. He choked down another wave of panic as he stepped inside the dark living room. “Sans?” Grillby called out, voice feeling muffled by the oppressive, eerie silence. “Sans, are you here? ...god, please be here.” He pulled out his phone again as he walked up the stairs, dialing Sans’s number and waiting.

A default ringtone went off in Sans’s room.

The bartender should’ve felt relieved, but if anything, the sound scared him more than the silence. If Sans was here, why didn’t he answer the phone? Respond to the texts? Grillby tried the door and found it locked, struggling with the knob despite knowing it was useless. “Sans! Are you there?! Please, answer me!”

But nobody came.

The panic Grillby had been holding back consumed him. The fire that made up his body grew as he stepped back, leaning against the railing before moving forward and kicking down the door. 

The room was empty. Sans’s phone was ringing on the bed, abandoned.

For the second time that day, Grillby found himself sobbing, kneeling on the floor as he desperately tried to force himself to breathe. This couldn’t be happening. He couldn’t have lost Sans, too. He didn’t even say goodbye. He didn’t even get to tell him…

Dizzy with exhaustion, Grillby looked up at the phone again. On the bed next to it was a piece of paper, folded around something. Dragging himself to his feet, the bartender stumbled over, sinking to the ground again as he picked it up. A key fell into his lap. It was small and silver, and it looked old. The note it had been wrapped in had a drawing of the house, with an arrow pointing to something in the back. As Grillby’s gaze drifted down to the base of the drawing, he choked on another sob.

Hey Grillbz,

If you’re reading this, you probably did something stupid like go to my house by yourself with a homicidal psychopath on the loose. Don’t worry, I get it. You did this last time, too. Anyway, this go around, I’m not gonna be here when you show up. 

That key you’ve got goes to a basement behind the house. Go in there. You’ll figure out for yourself where I’ve gone.

When you do, please don’t follow me.

I love you, Grillby. I’m sorry.

~Sans

Grillby read the note over and over, crying as the implications sank in. Whatever Sans was doing, it didn’t sound like he planned to come back. Well, if he thought that Grillby wasn’t going to go after him, he was dead wrong. But first… the bartender had to figure out where Sans was going.

It had taken a minute to get the door behind the house to open. The lock was old, and it stuck for a moment while Grillby jiggled the key to get it in. It finally swung open with an echoing creak, light from outside barely able to illuminate the inside of what looked to be a small home lab of some kind.

Grillby stepped inside, drawn to the large machine in the back. The damage to the odd machine and the char marks on the floor did nothing for Grillby’s anxiety, but the lack of dust around it at least assured him that it probably wasn’t the dangerous thing Sans had been alluding to. The fire monster stepped away from it, moving towards the desk and the piles of paper there. The first thing that caught his eye was a drawer slightly ajar, something inside reflecting the light that Grillby gave off. He opened it the rest of the way, immediately recognizing the badge inside as he picked it up. “This… This is the insignia of the royal scientist. Why would he have this?” Grillby mumbled out loud. Now that he was thinking about it, why would Sans have any of this? It didn’t make any sense. Sans was a sentry, and he had been the entire time Grillby knew him. The skeleton had never mentioned living in Hotland or having a scientific career. The bartender was starting to question how well he knew his best friend, setting the badge back in the drawer and turning to the papers.

The first page was written in some sort of font that Grillby couldn’t understand. Looking at it made his hurt, so he moved it to the side, skipping over it. The next page was thankfully readable. It described something called ‘DT’, and the effects it could have on a monster’s magic if infused properly. The records of the experiments had been partially burned, but most of what Grillby could read was too complicated for him to understand. He never thought Sans was dumb, but the complicated equations were far beyond anything Grillby had seen before. He hadn’t guessed Sans had that level of intelligence, or put that level of work into any one project.

The last few pages had the most burns out of all of them. Some sections were written in that headache-inducing language, with a lot of the notes Grillby could read seemingly added later. It looked like a comparison between the effectiveness of multiple attacks before and after the use of DT. The last few notes made Grillby burn lower, nearly going cold.

In conclusion, DT can be used to temporarily increase stamina and allow a monster to use their magic more effectively, summoning attacks and creating patterns like nothing seen before. However, drawing that level of magic from a monster’s soul can cause their soul to become unstable, tearing it apart. A monster could not withstand the effects of DT long-term without turning to dust.

I could handle it, just for a little while. If it came down to it, I could use the machine on myself and keep the kid from hurting anyone else.

Papyrus… Alphys… Grillby… ���︎✋︎☠︎☝︎👎︎✋︎☠︎☝︎💧︎… I’m so sorry.

“No,” Grillby whispered, his eyes widening in panic. “No, no no no no please tell me you didn’t- Sans-”

Sans was going to fight the human.

No matter the outcome, Sans was going to turn to dust.

Grillby ignored the sting of the rain as he sprinted through Waterfall. He didn’t have time to worry about his HP. Sans used that machine on himself. He’d managed to build it, surely he could reverse it if Grillby just reached him in time. His mind was reeling, trying to catch up with everything he learned. Sans had once been involved with the royal scientist. Was that how he knew Alphys? And what was with that strange handwriting? Why would Sans hide it from him? The rain didn��t bother Grillby this time, but he felt a sting in his soul as he realized just how little he knew about Sans. Everything he learned about him throughout their friendship… was it all a lie? Just a cover-up for whatever Sans had done in the past? It didn’t make sense. Nothing made sense anymore.

Grillby’s footsteps echoed in the corridors of New Home as he sprinted down the main path. Alphys had said that the human was in New Home somewhere, undoubtedly heading towards the castle. If Sans were to face them, it would be there. He only hoped he could reach him in time.

Sans fell backward as he felt the human’s blade slice through his ribcage. Looking down, he watched in distant shock as blood started to seep from the wound. He knew the whole battle had been pointless… Frisk would just load their save file each time they died, coming back over and over until they killed him… but it still felt so surreal. The fight was over. Sans lost.

“Heh… heh heh…” The skeleton laughed breathlessly to himself as he looked up. The human was expressionless, uncaring. How? How could they have so much apathy, after everyone they hurt?

It didn’t matter. Sans forced himself to his feet, coughing as blood dripped from his mouth. It would be fine. Frisk would reset, everyone would come back, and then they’d die again. The warm golds and oranges of the hall began to blur together as the bloodloss made Sans woozy and he stumbled, leaning against one of the pillars. If he closed his eyes…

He could almost pretend he was sitting at a familiar bar, the bartender smiling at him as he cracked jokes and drank from a ketchup bottle.

“Welp. I’m going to Grillby’s,” Sans said weakly, tears filling his eyes.

“Papyrus… do you want anything?”

Footsteps echoed in the final hallway as Grillby ran, desperation gripping his soul. He almost ran right past it. He skidded to a stop as his mind processed what he’d seen. His mind went empty and numb, and he turned around, walking a few paces back the way he’d come.

At the base of one of the pillars was a blue jacket, sitting in a pile of dust.

Grillby screamed.

No. No, it couldn’t end like this. The fire elemental fell to his knees and picked up Sans’s jacket, wailing as he held it to his chest. When he did- God, he was covered in dust. Sans’s dust. The thought made him drop the jacket and turn away, gagging and throwing up until there was nothing left.

Grillby wrapped his arms around himself, the humidity in the room increasing as he sobbed. He thought of Sans’s smile, his jokes and laughter, the way he always winked at the end of a bad pun. Was any of that even real? Did Sans enjoy being around Grillby, or was it all a façade? Grief and betrayal settled heavily over the bartender, threatening to drown him. He dry-heaved again, choking as he desperately fought for air.

I love you, Grillby.

Grillby... I’m so sorry.

The words washed over him, pushing those feelings away. It didn’t matter. Whoever Sans had been before, it didn’t change what the two of them had. Grillby wouldn’t let it.

Grillby picked up Sans’s jacket as he stood, shaking the dust off and putting it on. The heat in the room became sweltering as the fire monster was filled with rage. That human... that human had taken so much from him. His friends, his family... the skeleton he loved. They couldn’t get away with it. He wouldn’t let them.

The fire monster walked towards the end of the hall, eyes burning with murderous rage. That human was going to pay for what they-

The world stuttered.

Grillby hummed to himself as he wiped down his bar, getting ready to open for the day. Hm, that was strange. Lifting the cloth, he noticed that it had quickly gotten fairly dirty. There was dust all over Grillby’s hands, coming off on the towel. He shrugged to himself as he wiped them off and got another towel.

It was probably nothing.

Thanks for reading! This one accidentally turned out kind of long. It’s pretty stream-of-consciousness, but I’m too busy to edit it today and I’m too eager to post it to wait.

Reblog or leave me a comment telling me what you think! Asks are open if you would like to leave a prompt for me, and let me know if you want to be on my Undertale fic taglist!

[fitzs-trained-monkey]

Chapter One: Lonely Together

Jack Kline x OC

Rated: PG

~I might hate myself tomorrow

But I'm on my way tonight

Let's be lonely together

A little less lonely together~

Sent: 10:52 PM

Merry Christmas, stranger. I hope yours is as bright as new fallen snow. Stay warm.

I smiled down at my phone before clicking it off and slipping it into my pocket. I didn't know who I had sent the message to. It was just a number I had punched in at random. I didn't expect anyone to reply.

Wrapping my dark green cardigan tighter around my body, I pulled my knees in closer to my chest and pressed myself closer against the wall of the bakery. The wall was only slightly warmer than the frigid air around me. It was December 2nd and icy gales were blowing in from Lake Superior and stinging the skin of the city's occupants.

The sky hung dark, low, and flat over Copper Harbor, Michigan. Copper Harbor was an itty-bitty town at the northern most tip of the northernmost part of Michigan. You know that piece of land that's only connected to the mainland by a highway, that in-between place that really should be Canada, but isn't? That's where Copper Harbor is and that's where I was.

Copper Harbor was the sort of town where newcomers and visitors are as common as flying pigs and are treated with about as much scrutiny. It's not one of those small, friendly towns just off the highway; the ones that are pleasant to find yourself in if you've taken a wrong turn. It's quite the feat to get lost and turn up in Copper Harbor, considering its miles away from anything and everything remotely interesting, unless you're searching for Bigfoot or a drunk Canadian that took a wrong turn. Though those two things might just end up being one and the same. No, nobody came to Copper Harbor unless they had a reason. That's just the sort of place it was. And aside from the mind-numbing cold, it was exactly the sort of place I wanted to be.

The clouds were so heavy with the snow that now drifted down, dusting everything in a layer of fine white powder, it seemed that someone standing on even the lowest rooftop could reach up and touch them. The snowflakes raining down from those clouds gave the appearance of tiny shooting stars. Many would have found the sight beautiful. I didn't. I just found it cold and somewhat depressing. Some people say that shooting stars are angels, falling to the earth to bless the lives of people in need. I've never liked those sorts of stories. The stars belong in the heavens. The dust belongs on the earth. Collecting in puddles, the sparkling, sugar-like ice crystals did nothing to ease the bitter cold. I shivered and coughed, my breath fogging in front of me.

I should have frozen to death hours ago.

But I can't die. At least, not that way.

Suffering, on the other hand, I can do that to no end.

I put my head between my knees, hoping to retain what little heat my walking corpse had to offer. I struggled to remain conscious. The story of the little-match-girl was playing in my head. I'd never liked that story's ending. Hallucinations really weren't my thing, especially hallucinations about things I tried not to think about, the things I tried to burry in the farthest corners of my mind. I had to distract myself, to think about anything that would keep me awake. The problem was, there was nothing to distract me.

Pling!

My phone buzzed in my pocket with a text. I grasped it quickly, greedy for a distraction, but I paused upon seeing the number displayed upon the screen. It was that number I had texted the Merry Christmas message to. Whoever it was had texted me back. I unlocked my phone and peered at the mystery person's message.

Received: 11:18 PM

Merry Christmas to you as well!

The message read. I smiled a little, surprised that anyone would care to return my quiet Christmas wish. The screen of my phone lit up with another message.

Received: 11:19 PM

Who are you?

The question was a simple one. Though tone can often be difficult to infer over written text, the question seemed to bear no hostility, only innocent curiosity. I thought for a bit about what to say, the answer was not as simple as the question had implied.

***

Located quite literally one thousand miles away from Copper Harbor, was the small, out-of-the-way town of Lebanon, Kansas. Now, in the outskirts Lebanon there was a hill. The hill was modestly sized and carpeted with thick grass painted with a layer of frost. Although it was a rather pleasant sight for some stray hiker to find, the hill was really quite unremarkable. That is, if you ignored the hulking steel door built into the side of it that looked like the entrance to a post-apocalyptic hobbit hole. See, built under that hill there was a bunker. It looked like any ordinary bunker if one can ever describe a bunker as ordinary. But inside this ordinary looking bunker, sat something rather extraordinary and his name was Jack.

Jack Kline was quite happy where he was. Sitting with his legs crossed on a chair beside the bunker's fireplace, Jack held Sam's beloved lap-top between his knees. Sam let him borrow it on the nights he couldn't sleep. Those nights were many. Sleepless nights were one of the many side effects of being half-angel, but he didn't really mind. Jack wasn't overly fond of sleep, not like Sam or Dean who adored the few hours they got. Jack would much rather be awake because if he was asleep then he couldn't observe. He liked to observe. He loved learning. He loved taking in anything and everything going on around him, soaking it all up like a sponge with legs. He especially loved to soak up a story. Epic ones with heroes that defeat powerful villains. Jack loved stories.

So, no; Jack Kline was not overly fond of sleep. No, Jack preferred to just sit quietly and watch those epic stories as they played out in front of him on the screen of Sam's lap-top.

Currently, he was watching Star Wars: The Clone Wars. The computer had said he would like it, and the computer had been right. He had just finished season 2 and had begun on season 3. Some small voice in the back of his mind told him he should slow down and draw the series out a little longer, but Jack just couldn't find the will to do so. This story was just too good to stop. Jack shoved a hand full of popcorn in his mouth as he pressed the play button on the next episode. He had managed to sneak several bags of popcorn from the kitchen and into the secret stash in his room a few nights earlier. It was perfect, except popcorn needed to be popped and popping the kernels without attracting notice was a bit of a challenge. But he found that if he popped them during the day, when everyone was clamoring about and busy with whatever, the noise from the popping kernels wouldn't peak any suspicion. The only downside to his strategy was that it left him with cold popcorn. Though this too could be remedied via his angel powers, if he was careful about it, he could warm up the popcorn undetected.

Now, don't get the impression that Jack was being starved, or held in this bunker against his will, or something awful like that. As was mentioned before, Jack was very happy there. The Winchesters, Sam and Dean, and the angel Castiel, lived there with him and took care of him. They were his family and Jack loved them. The only reason he had a secret stash at all was because Sam was the only one in the bunker who cared about the importance of having a somewhat healthy diet. Whereas Dean let the boy eat pretty much anything he wanted and Cas- well in Cas's mind food was food and that's all there was to it. But Sam didn't like it when he caught Jack eating what he referred to as 'junk food'.

Somehow, Sam always caught him.

"That stuff’ll rot your teeth, Jack!" He'd sigh, as he'd flip on the kitchen light and catch Jack eating cereal sometime around midnight. Then he'd look at Jack with a disappointed look on his face until Jack threw the cereal away and went back to bed. Jack hated it when Sam looked at him like that, he just couldn't bear to let the Winchesters down.

But Jack loved to eat. Eating was enjoyable as it brought with it something new every time. Yet more things to absorb and to experience. Although the younger Winchester disapproved of the more sugary foods; Jack liked those a whole lot more than the salads Sam tried to get him to eat. Jack didn't like the salads or 'Rabbit Food' as Dean called it. No, Jack liked popcorn a quite a bit more.

He smiled as he brought another handful into his mouth. Yes, Jack Kline quite enjoyed eating.

Plip! Ploop!

Jack's head swiveled away from the screen to stare at the phone laying face-up on the arm rest of the chair in which he sat. The screen was alight with a text message. He picked up the phone and unlocked it. The message read:

Received: 10:52 PM

Merry Christmas, stranger. I hope yours is as bright as new fallen snow. Stay warm.

That was all. Jack was quite confused; he didn't know that number. Who had sent the text? What should he do? Should he say something back?

Curiosity and caution struggled in a match tug-of-war in his head. He wanted to know who the message had come from. He wanted to know why that person had sent it. He also wanted to know why he had a strange feeling that whoever had sent the message was horribly sad. But would the Winchesters be mad at him if he answered? Sam and Dean had given him the phone just a few days earlier.

"For emergencies," Sam had said as he laid the device in Jack's hand before resuming his packing. Jack had stared at it, rather confused as to its purpose. Castiel had been off somewhere doing something and Sam and Dean had been leaving for a hunt, leaving him alone which Dean was completely and utterly against.

"Only for emergencies," Dean had stressed, jabbing his finger in Jack's general direction as he inspected various articles of clothing before tossing them into a duffle bag. "That means don't text or call unless someone is breaking in or you're dying!"

Sam shot his older brother a warning look. Dean ignored it and pulled a pair of socks out of his dresser, sniffing them briefly before making a face and chucking them to the other side of the room. Jack looked back down at the small black rectangle in his palm.

"Okay so, only text or call in case there's an emergency. Got it." Jack clinched the thin black box between his thumb and forefinger, carefully lifting it up as if it might explode in his face. "But, one question, if something happens like-like you said, like somebody breaking in or me dying, how-how would I do that?" He asked, looking back at the two brothers. They both froze their hasty packing and pivoted to stare at him, their eyebrows raised with disbelieving question.

"What?" Dean asked the young Nephilim. Jack shrank away a little, not wanting to upset the older Winchester.

"How do I text or call you? I don't know how to do that," Jack had timidly replied. Dean just shook his head and returned to over-stuffing the duffle. Sam, however, was much more understanding.

"That's right, you-you don't, do you?" Sam asked, realizing his mistake. Jack turned his attention to the younger of the brothers, shaking his head in an answer to Sam's question.

"Unbelievable," Dean muttered, rolling his eyes. Sam shot him another glare which Dean merely shrugged off.

"Well, come on then, I'll teach you," Sam had said. Jack watched as Sam set the contacts and explained how everything worked. He showed Jack how to send a text, how to dial and answer a call, and all the other things Jack would need to know. Jack just watched him and took note of every little thing. Watching and replicating was how Jack learned best.

"Now, if I don't answer my phone, you call Dean. But if he doesn't pick up, I want you to call me again, if I still don't answer a second time, I want you to call this number right here. That's Jody Mills, she's a friend of ours and she'll help you, alright? You get all that?" Sam finished explaining and looked for Jack to confirm his understanding. Jack nodded.

"I got it!" He said, enthusiastically. Sam gave the young boy a nervous smile.

"You do? Can you repeat it back to me?" Sam asked Jack the question the same way Sam and Dean's father had always asked them.

"If something happens, call you, and if you don't answer, call Dean. If Dean doesn't answer then I call you again, but if you still don't pick up, then call Jody Mills." Jack repeated all of Sam's instructions perfectly, grinning proudly at the younger Winchester when he finished. Sam laughed a little, but nerves twinged his voice.

"Good, yeah. Okay," Sam paused, thinking things over, "You know what, Jack? If neither of us answer your call and it's really that urgent, don't bother calling me a second time. Just call Jody right away if you can't get through to either of us. Alright?"

"Alright!" Jack nodded, grinning. Sam nodded back, stiffly.

"Alright." He seemed like he wanted to say something else but didn't know how to say it.

"You two done in there, Sammy?! We gotta go!" Dean called, walking in from another room. Sam stood and looked at his brother.

"Uh, yeah. I think we're good," He took a few steps towards the stairs that lead up to the door before pausing and turning back to Jack, "We're good, right? You're gonna be okay here by yourself?" Sam asked again. Jack grinned and gave him a thumbs up.

"I'll be fine. You don't have to worry."

Sam nodded and smiled with so much nervousness it almost hurt to watch.

"Okay, good. It's good. We're good," He said, nodding and trying to reassure himself more than anyone else. Dean raised an eyebrow at his overly anxious little brother, tugging his old leather jacket on over his shoulders, but he didn't say anything. Instead, he directed his remarks at Jack.

"Hey, kid. Whatever you do, don't do anything stupid," He'd said, half glaring, "We'll be back in a few days." Then they'd left.

Now, Jack glanced back down at the phone in his hands, remembering Dean's warning about not doing anything stupid. But his curiosity regarding the sender of the message was overwhelming. It couldn't hurt to text this person back, right? Was that what Dean had meant by his warning? Did this count as something stupid? What was the worst that could happen? Deciding that the benefits outweighed the risks, he texted back.

Sent: 10:18 PM

Merry Christmas to you as well!

Jack wrote.

Sent: 10:19 PM

Who are you?

No sooner had asked his question, he began to worry that he might have sounded rude. He waited with anticipation for the mystery person to reply. He didn't have to wait long.

Received: 10:20 PM

It doesn't matter, you don't know me.

I'm just someone wanting to give you a warm holiday wish.

Jack frowned. Again, he got the distinct feeling that the person on the other side of this conversation was deeply saddened by something. He desperately wanted to know what. So, he did the thing he did best. He asked and waited to see what would happen.

***

Received: 11:21 PM

If you don't know me, why do you care?

I don't mean to be rude. I'm just curious.

Why do this?

I read the person's question once, then twice, then three times and I realized that I didn't have an answer. Why did I care? Why was I texting some random person a Christmas wish? For all I knew, this person may not even observe the holiday. I had so many of my own things to worry about I was nearly drowning in them. I didn't know this person. I had nothing to do with them. So, why did I care about their holiday season? Why was I doing this?

I told myself it was just a random act of kindness. But deep down I knew what the reason was, and even if I didn't want to think about it, I felt it in my heart. I was doing this for the same reason I did everything. So, I took a few moments and came up with a reply.

Sent: 11:25 PM

I'm doing this because I believe that no one should ever have to be alone,

especially during the holidays.

I sent my reply and remembered to keep on shivering. I could hardly feel the cold anymore, I had gone almost completely numb. But I knew if I didn't keep moving, I would surely freeze in place and be unable to move until spring came. I vaguely wondered how cold it was. I remembered having heard on someone's car radio that this was supposed to be the coldest winter Michigan had experienced in the last decade. Though winter had only just begun, it was already cold enough for the district council to be suggesting face coverings to prevent citizens from getting frostbite and losing their nose.

I sneezed. I had no such face covering. Hell! I didn't even have a jacket! Let alone a coat or anything mildly warm. All I had was my oversized green cardigan, my black Star Wars t-shirt and my black jeans. That was it. Yet here I sat, outside a bakery in well below freezing temperatures, shivering myself into next decade.

I could go to a shelter. At least there I wouldn't have to endure the bitter biting of the wind as it gushed with double its normal force through these tight, abandoned alleyways. But if I went to a shelter then there was no chance of leaving undetected, I reminded myself. No, it was better to stay here, cold and alone, than to risk human contact.

I was pulled from my thoughts by another pling from my phone. Another message from that unknown contact.

Received: 11: 27

Are you alone?

Again, the question was simple. And although the mere thought hurt like a knife twisting in a fresh wound, I looked around at the dark, trash littered alleyway I sat in, watching the scattered rags of paper flutter and tumble in the winter gales, and I looked at the brutally beautiful puddles of speckled ice gathering along my body and melting on my skin, and I examined the bleak night sky, choked starless by the drifting dreary clouds; and the utterly silent stillness of the sleeping city revealed the harsh reality of my answer.

No one was here.

Nobody cared.

Not even the stars would keep me company. Because the stars never cared who I was.

So, with no reason to keep the truth hidden. I answered the question honestly.

Sent: 11: 29 PM

Yes.

Sent: 11: 30 PM

I am alone.

I was completely and utterly alone.

***

Received: 10: 30 PM

I am alone.

Once again Jack got the distinct impression that these words carried a heavy burden. It made him frown. What could he do to help a person he didn't even know? He wanted to ask this person if they had any friends, but something about those words told him the answer. When this person had said they were alone, Jack got the feeling they weren't just talking about the current moment. But maybe that's what this person needed. Maybe they needed a friend.

Sent: 10: 32 PM

Well, I'll be your friend and talk to you. There, now you're not alone anymore!

Jack smiled as he sent the text. The reply didn't take long.

Received: 10: 33 PM

Thank you.

You don't have waste your time on me but thank you.

It didn't take any special powers to read in between the lines this time, anyone could see the sadness in those words. Though Jack wasn't sure if it was his powers causing that strange feeling or if he was just imagining things.

Sent: 10:34 PM

I don't mind. Really!

Besides, I don't have anyone to talk to either.

Received: 10: 35 PM

Well, in that case, we can be lonely together!

Jack grinned. He'd made himself a friend. He couldn't wait to get to know them.

***

Received: 11: 36 PM

Since we're friends now, what's your name?

I smiled down at my new mystery friend's message. There was something about the words that made them seem innocent and earnest. It couldn't hurt to give my name, right? It’s not like he could find me. After all, I'm supposed to be dead.

Sent: 11: 37 PM

My name is Martina.

I sent my name and waited for the response. It came quickly.

Received: 11: 38 PM

I like your name Martina!

It's very pretty.

I flinched as I read the text. Something about seeing my name written in the text brought me back to a conversation with a different person a long time ago. It was a painful memory, and I didn't want to see it anymore. I didn't want another reminder of the still bleeding wounds in my heart. I remembered why I didn't let anyone call me that name anymore.

Sent: 11: 39 PM

Thank you.

But I would prefer you call me Marty.

I didn't want to be so sensitive to things like this, but I just couldn't help it.

Received: 11: 40 PM

Alright! I like Marty too.

It's a fun name.

I smiled; grateful they didn't ask why it was so important that they called me by a nickname.

Sent: 11: 41 PM

Thanks for understanding.

So, what's your name?

Received: 11: 42 PM

My name is Jack!

I grinned to myself. I'd made me a friend. I just couldn't wait to get to know him.

Sent: 11: 43 PM

Heya, Jack!

It’s nice to meet you!

I think this is the beginning of a wonderful friendship.

Received: 11: 44 PM

I agree, Marty. We are going to be great friends!

Sent: 11: 45 PM

So, what's your favorite movie?

And just like that, we talked until the sun came up. And suddenly, for the first time in quite a while, I wasn't completely alone.

***

"Hey, uh, Jack? We're back!"

Sam's voice drifted in from just outside Jack's bedroom door. Jack was surprised. He hadn't heard the brothers come in which, for him, was quite peculiar.

The door creaked open and Jack hastily attempted to pretend like he hadn't been using the phone.

He failed.

Miserably.

The device slipped from his hand and he fumbled to catch it before it smashed against the grey, polished concrete floor. He let out a sigh of relief as he snatched it just in time.

Sam peered around the door, checking in on Jack, who was now hanging halfway off his bed and clutching the phone. Scrambling to sit upright, Jack gave Sam a half-panicked smile.

"Hi Sam!" He waved a greeting, shoving his phone behind his back. Sam raised his eyebrows in a questioning expression and stepped into the room, shutting the door behind him. He folded his arms and leaned back on his heels.

"Hey Jack," Sam seemed a little distracted, "Have you seen Cas?" He asked. Jack shook his head vigorously.

"He's not back yet," He answered. Sam nodded and started to leave before stopping and turning back. Only now seeming to notice Jack's odd behavior. Sam gestured at the phone hidden behind the boys back,

"So, what were you doing in here just now?" Jack's eyes flew wide as quarters and his gaze shifted rapidly around the room, focusing on anywhere but Sam. His mind was working overtime trying to find a viable excuse.

"Uhhhh...Nothing!" Jack tried; his brain had gone blank. Sam raised an eyebrow.

"You sure about that?" Sam leaned forward a little, narrowing his eyes. Jack leaned back to match; his face scrunched up with the guilt he was trying very hard to hide. Everyone in the bunker knew how terrible Jack was at lying. He might be able to pass a few simple fibs by a stranger, but his family saw through him like he was made of glass. He couldn't deceive them. But that didn't stop him from trying, however.

"Yes..." Jack said slowly, his eyebrows pulling together in a rather sad attempt at looking sincere.

"Jack, what were you doing?" Sam asked more sternly. Jack looked at his feet and didn't answer. His shoulders moved up and down in a shrug.

"Do I have to go get Dean?" Sam pressed. Now Jack's head shot up. He stretched his hands out in a pleading gesture.

"No, no! Don't tell Dean!" Jack begged. Sam's expression shifted into one of concern.

"If you tell me, I won't tell Dean." Sam agreed, moving to sit on the bed beside Jack who shifted to give him some space. Sam waited patiently for the young Nephilim to speak. Jack kept his head down and rubbed his hands together nervously as he tried to think of how he should explain himself.

"Well, last night I was watching Netflix when I got this text from somebody wishing me a merry Christmas-" He started.

"Someone we know?" Sam asked, interrupting. Jack shook his head and continued.

"I asked them why they would do that, and they said it was because they thought that nobody should be alone this time of year. So, I asked if they were alone and they said, yes ─" Jack looked the younger Winchester in the eyes ─

"I don't know why but I just got this- this feeling, and they sounded just so sad, and now we're friends! But Dean said not to do anything stupid, and now I'm worried that I did! Are you mad?" Jack finished, worry coloring his features. Sam blinked. Once again astounded by the size of the half-angel's heart, he shook his head.

"No, Jack. I'm not mad," He said, softly.

"Really?"

"Really. I think you did a good thing. Everyone needs a friend." Sam patted Jack's shoulder and smiled. Jack looked down, grinning to himself as pride filled his chest.

Sam waited a moment before getting up from the bed. Stretching his back out and groaning a bit as he stood. It had been almost 48 hours since he last slept, and he was more than ready for a long nap. His hand rested on the doorknob and he paused a moment before turning back around.

"Hey, uh, Jack. Just one more thing. Do you by chance know this person's name?" Sam asked. Jack looked up briefly before looking back at the floor again, trying to hide the embarrassment creeping up to stain his cheeks.

"It's, uh, it's Marty," He replied. Sam nodded and moved to leave again but he stopped. His eyebrows pulled down with confusion before he turned back.

"And uh, is that a boy's name or a girl's name? Do you know?" Jack turned his head a bit to the side and picked at a thread in his jeans.

"Does it matter?" He questioned back. Truthfully, it didn't. Sam wouldn't make Jack stop if he didn't want to. But to say that the boy's current evasive behavior didn't pique his interest, would be a lie. Though, the kid’s flushed cheeks told him quite a bit about the answer.

"It doesn't matter," Sam said, shrugging, "I'm just curious is all." The tall man watched the boy's reaction. Jack nodded and shifted as if uncomfortable.

"Marty's a girl." He answered, trying to force his voice into sounding nonchalant. And failing.

"Okay, cool." Sam nodded, turning around again, and reaching for the handle. Jack's head whipped around.

"Wait, Sam!"

Sam looked over his shoulder.

"Hmm?"

"Don't. Tell. Dean!" Jack stressed. Urgency was evident in his voice. Sam huffed a laugh.

"Okay, Jack." With that, Sam pulled open the door and walked out letting the heavy steel swing shut behind him. Behind the door, Jack sighed with relief. He'd dodged a bullet with that one.

Walking a ways down the hall, Sam got to Dean's room where his older brother was now unpacking. The younger brother leaned on the door frame and expelled the laughter he'd been holding on to since Jack’s room. Dean turned around, holding a pistol and a pair of weeks old and hopelessly blood caked socks in his hands, he faced Sam with a questioning look.

"What's got you so giggly all of a sudden?" The older of the brother's asked.

Dean glanced at the pair of socks in his hand. He grimaced at the stench and held them further away from his face, trying not to breathe. It didn't work. The socks odor was so pungent, Dean could smell them through his mouth. There was no hope of washing them. Nope, those things would have to be burned. Though, taking another whiff of them, Dean wasn't sure that even incinerating the socks would do him much good now. The stomach-turning stink would be branded into his memory forever. Sam straightened up, shaking his head of shoulder length hair.

"It's just something Jack said." Sam smiled and laughed again before taking notice of the unholy stench wafting off the socks. He coughed. "Dude, those stink. Bad!"

"Yeah, it's a sad day, Sammy." Dean nodded solemnly. Sam covered his nose.

"Why?"

"These were my second luckiest pair of socks."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"Well, they're not anymore," Sam pointed out. Now, they were just rancid.

"I think we should give em' a Viking funeral, something to honor their service. I mean, I remember one time when I wore these things for two weeks straight!" Dean reminisced, grinning. Sam looked mildly disturbed.

"That's, uh... nice... But, uh, is there somewhere we could put them before the funeral? Because they, uh, they reek." Sam was trying hard not to gag and couldn't understand how Dean could be holding them and remain unaffected. Dean smirked.

"You wanna go put em' somewhere?" He asked, waving the socks into Sam's face. Sam leaned away.

"Ah! God! No! Put those things somewhere! Please!" He choked out. Dean just grinned and moved to the other side of the room. Grabbing a cardboard box from off the shelf, he shoved the socks in there and sealed the lid. The stench quickly began to dissipate.

"Better?"

"Yeah, thanks."

"We're gonna have to burn that box too."

"Yup." Sam still felt a little sick but at least the socks were gone.

"So, what was it Jack said that you thought was so funny?" The older brother asked.

"Oh, uh, nothing. It was nothing," Sam said. But laughter began to creep up on him again. Dean rolled his eyes and went back to pulling more dirty clothing from the duffle bag.

"Are ya gonna stand there or are ya gonna spill?" Dean pushed. Sam sobered up again.

"Well, I'm not supposed to tell you," He said.

Dean shook his head, mildly annoyed. He knew Sam was going to tell him whatever juicy information he had gotten, just like he always did when he got that sly look on his face. Sam could be a bit of a schoolgirl that way. Except, of course, when it came to the important things, the things Dean was supposed to know. Those things Sam always kept to himself.

"Well, Sammy, if you ain’t gonna spill─" he used the gun in his hand to gesture from Sam to the duffle bag─ "get workin'."

The younger Winchester moved to the bag and started unpacking, grinning his face off all the while. Dean knew his little brother was waiting for him to ask about the thing with Jack again, so he said nothing. He just waited for Sam to look over to him eagerly, which is exactly what Sam did.

"So get this!" Sam started.

'Here it comes.' Dean predicted internally. Sam kept starring.

'Yatzee.' Dean thought. He knew Sam like the back of his hand. Actually, he probably knew his brother better than that.

"Apparently, Jack got a text from some random person last night wishing him merry Christmas. And, well, you know Jack! So he─" Dean stopped his brother mid-sentence.

"What's her name?" He interrupted. Sam looked confused.

"I didn't say anything about a girl," Sam trailed off. Dean sighed and shook his head.

"Geez, Sammy! If you love drama so much, you should go be an actor. You ain't foolin' anybody. We both know where this is goin' so just cut to the chase!" Dean sighed, opening a trunk and tossing in the gun he'd been holding along with several knives. His small outburst had startled his younger brother, but Dean didn't really care. Sam wasn't the only one who hadn't slept in 48 hours. Sleep was calling and Dean wanted nothing more than to answer. Sam frowned.

"Marty. The girl's name is Marty," Sam stated, sounding rather put out that Dean had guessed at his not-so-cleaver ploy. The older if the pair turned to the younger with a perplexed expression.

"Wait, wait. Marty?" He clarified. Amused disbelief written all over his features.

"Marty," Sam confirmed.

"Marty?"

"Yeah. Marty."

"Like the zebra in Madagascar, Marty?" Dean asked, grinning. Sam nodded.

"Yeah, like that. But remember, you didn't hear anything from me!" He answered, smiling as well. Dean laughed as he turned his attention back to the mess of clothing and weapons surrounding him on the floor.

"Yeah, whatever, drama queen." Dean rolled his eyes and kept working. The room was silent for a moment before the older Winchester burst out laughing again. He couldn't help himself; he found the subject hilarious.

"Ah, man. Marty! Now there's a name!" He exclaimed as he started folding the few clean clothing items laying in the pile. "What? Did her parents just take one look at her and say: 'Look at our beautiful baby! Let's name her Marty!'" Dean scoffed.

Sam snorted and shook his head at his older brother's bad joke. Then he leaned his head back and yawned.

"Man, I think we need some sleep," Sam sighed. Dean smirked.

"Is it your bedtime already?" He taunted, expecting a playful retort. But this time, Sam didn't argue. He just nodded.

"Yeah, I think it is." Though worried about his little brother, Dean held his playful smirk in place perfectly, just like he had been doing for so many years.

"Well, you go ahead and hit the sack. I'll finish up here." He said, easily. Even though he was just as tired and Sam was, he would finish out like always. Sam raised an eyebrow.

"You sure?"

"Yeah, o'course. There's not much left anyway." That was a lie and they both knew it, but Sam took the offer of sleep while it was on the table.

"Thanks, Dean."

"You're welcome, Sammy."

Sam patted his older brother on the arm as he stood and left the room. Traveling down the corridor he got to his bedroom and was out as soon as his head hit the pillow.

Meanwhile, Dean mouthed the strange name of Jack's mystery girl and chuckled about it to himself. Sitting on the floor in his room as he continued folding the rest of the clean clothes, cleaning out all the weapons and putting everything back in its place. The chore took him two more hours to complete but when it was done, he stretched himself out and laid back on his bed.

"Marty. Now, that's hilarious." Dean snickered to himself as he drifted off to sleep.

~I might hate myself tomorrow.

But I'm on my way tonight.

Let's be lonely together.

A little less lonely together~

Lyrics from: Lonely Together by Jasmine Thompson

[old-hyper-super-clover]

Squeeze that bunny tail!

Part 4

Description: The RAD student council as well as the exchange students help out at a bar where, oops, the staff´s dress codes are those sweet bunny outfits that we all know and thirst for. The MCs, Violet and Clover, play a game of who can touch the most bunny tails over the evening without getting caught. Prepare for fluff, funny innuendos as well as my thirst over hot boys in bunny outfits.

The story is divided in several parts and will be updated every few days. find the other parts in my masterlist.

Story continues below the cut. Have fun!

Finally having stomached the midnight clothing change, the girls had to get back to work, so they kept their strategic meeting short.

However, when they finally stepped outside into the public again...

The demon lord was waiting for them.

Arms crossed, expression serious.

He was staring at them.

"Lord Diavolo...!" Violet pressed out while Clover gave a quiet but terrified "oh no he will actually kill me" as both backed away on instinct.

"May I have a word with you two?" the demon prince asked, however it felt more like a demand. They have never heard him speak in such a serious tone before.

The girls not able to give an answer other than a nod, Diavolo gestured at the staff's office room.

He let them step inside before closing the door... And locking it.

None of them have ever felt like shitting their pants more than in this moment.

"Violet, Clover" He raised his voice.

Clover had called her own death, and had accidentally pulled Violet with her.

"There is an urgent matter that I have to discuss with you two..."

That was it. The end.

Diavolo kept them trembling in a horrible silence for way too long.

"Y-yes...?" Violet somehow managed to say.

He took a heavy breath. The girls swallowed their fear.

Then, he spoke up.

"... Why do you keep squishing everyone's bunny tails? Is it some kind of human tradition? I'm dying to know!"

The girls literally felt like they just died.

"I've observed you for quite a while now, but I can't make out the reason behind it" Diavolo continued. "Please, fill me in...!"

----------------------

It took a while to recover, but in the end, the girls confessed about their game.

"We just look how many of those tails we can squeeze" Clover said.

"It's nothing more than a joke..." Violet mumbled. "I'm sorry to have upset you..."

Diavolo blinked at them.

"Upset?"

"Uhm... Yes..." Violet frowned in regret. "We will stop being childish while working. Again, sorry for-"

"Can I join your game?"

Silence.

"Y... You want to... Squeeze the guys' tails with us?" Clover asked.

And Diavolo's natural smile said it all. So, it seemed like another opponent joined the game at half time...

---------------------------

The three parted quickly after as they were needed in the local, but Clover had an idea on how to keep things organized:

* Clover formed the group chat [Squeeze that bunny tail!] *

Diavolo: Hello!

Violet: ... Are you sure we shouldn't call the group something else...?

Diavolo: I quite like it.

Clover: Thank you, Sir :D

Diavolo: This is the first group chatroom I am in without Barbatos.

Violet: Should we add him?

Diavolo: No. Don't tell him. I am experiencing a new kind of freedom right now. Anyway, I wish you girls the best of luck in our competition!

---------------------

As this story is ridiculously long, let’s do a quick squeeze round!

Violet got very lucky... She caught Luke while the angel had been trying to reach for something in the kitchen shelves. He was still in his first outfit (because even demons do not support children nudity, that's gross), and looked adorable, standing on that stool to be tall enough.

After squeezing his tail, Violet offered her help.

... Only to realise she wasn't tall enough either.

But oh well, luckily, Solomon appeared and was there to grab those tiny cocktail parasols.

Later, Violet also worked with Asmo at the casino area for a while and got herself another point.

As for Clover... She tried.

Tried to squeeze Mammon´s tail a second time, but the greedy boy was also a very bouncy boy.

She also worked with Barbatos for quite a while, but as much as she wanted to go get those juicy two points, she just couldn't.

Something about this pretty man was scaring her... She found out later what it was.

Violet and Clover were serving drinks.

And for two girls without any real waitress-practise whatsoever, they did quite well.

But at one table, it had to happen.

The first broken glass of the evening. Clover had been holding the tray a little too sloppy.

As an ugly scream bubbled up her throat, she already felt the full glass of demonous fall, but was unable to do anything. The shattering of glass echoed through the bar, but what was worse was the growl that the customer pressed out.

Looking down on himself, Clover had perfectly spilled his drink onto the demon.

"You little..." he grunted, standing up and ready to break her neck this instant.

Clover backed away, of course, and felt how Violet had been there immediately to back her up.

"W-we apologize for this accident" Violet pressed out.

The demon seemed to get even more agitated, now raising his hand to hit her.

"Shut up you fucking-"

Then, another silhouette stepped in front of the girls.

Barbatos was gently holding the demon's hand back.

"In the name of the owner, I'd like to offer my deepest apologies as well. In cases like these, the local would like to immediately return the money you have spent this evening, and offers compensation in form of three free drinks of your choice."

Barbatos did a little bow after having finished.

"Screw the money..." The demon hissed. "I wanna tear those humans into miserable pieces. That´ll do as an apology."

Barbatos did not look up.

"... In that case..." the butler continued. "Guests who actively threaten the well-being of our dear staff will be treated according to their own attitude."

He straightened his back, beaming the demon a formal smile. "I will show you the exit. Please, do not think of coming back anytime soon."

Despite being so cocky before, now the customer flinched heavily. Finally, he seemed to follow the butler's orders. He spat on the table in some disrespectful dick move, then left the local.

---------------

Violet and Barbatos helped Clover clean the mess afterwards.

"Thanks for dealing with that guy..." Clover mumbled.

"Oh, there is no need" Barbatos hummed. "If not for me, one of the demon brothers would have come to your aid. And I fear a person like Mammon would not have left the situation without a fight, so I figured it would be best to jump in myself."

The girls gave a small giggle.

"That's true..." Violet mumbled. "But that only makes you even more impressive. It's rare to see a demon so calm."

“Calm?” Barbatos looked up from the broken glass he had been collecting. He seemed genuinely confused for a moment, then his usual smile was back.

"How cute" he chuckled.

"C-cute?!" Violet blinked in surprise.

But Barbatos was already making his leave.

"Ah, don't mind it..." he mused. "The naiveté is what makes you humans so charming."

----------------------------

Clover felt safer sticking to cleaning instead of potentially making another mess, so she was wiping the tables when she heard Diavolo calling out to her.

"Are you busy right now?" he asked.

"Not really, I'm still on cleaning duty but there isn't really much to do right now... Can I help you with anything?"

Taking a careful look around, Diavolo stepped closer, lowering his voice as well. "I am in trouble."

"Uhm..." Clover swallowed her stress. "And why?"

"I lost the master key. The one the owner gave me."

"... The one you need to lock the whole place with? The one that basically gives you control over the whole bar?"

"I see you smell the trouble now."

Clover gave a nod. "I do... Should I help you search?"

Diavolo's expression changed into a smile.

"That's what I wanted to hear! Thank you."

"No problem. Do you have any idea where it might be?"

So Diavolo gave it a thought, concluding that he must have lost it during his break.

"I looked through the bathroom already” he explained. “Which leaves only the kitchen and the staff's room."

Suddenly, a third voice joined the conversation.

"I did not notice anything like a key in the kitchen" Satan said, coming to a stop next to them.

"Oh, Satan, so you have overheard our conversation..." Diavolo crossed his arms.

"Don't worry, I won't spill anything to Lucifer" the blond laughed. "He'd only scold you, wouldn't he?" Then, his gaze fell on Clover. "I can help you search."

----------------

Clover and Satan looked through the whole staff's office.

Luckily no one was there to ask what they were doing, especially since they just couldn't find anything. Satan gave a sigh.

"Nothing... I even looked through Mammon's jacket in case his kleptomania had struck again..."

Meanwhile, Clover was rummaging through one of the desks. Giving a resigned breath as well, she was about to give up when she spotted something shimmering behind the wooden desk.

"I think I found it...!" Clover called out.

Satan came up to her, seeing as well how there was a key stuck in the web of cables behind the office desk.

"Wait, I'll get it."

He tried reaching it from above, but some computer monitors kept getting in the way.

In the end, Satan was crouched down, head under the table as he fiddled with the cables.

"I still can't reach it..." he pressed out under his breath.

Clover grumbled in displease, kneeling down as well. There wasn't enough room for her to help in any way, so all she could do was watch Satan do his thing...

Oh no.

She had THE perfect chance to squish Satan's tail. Due to his position, his booty was right in front of her, and he seemed more than busy to even bother her presence.

Three points, she thought...

Just a little tap, she thought...

Holding her breath, she stretched out a finger and reached for the pompom...

Merely a second later Clover found herself landing on her back, her wrists being pressed against the floor next to her head.

"I'M SORRY I'M SORRY I'M SORRY I'M SORRY."

Satan's body hovered above hers as he held her in a tight grip.

Clover was panicking.

"I'm so sorry - I shouldn't have done that - I'm sorry Satan Sir please don't kill me - I'm an idiot - I'm sorry I'm sorry - I love you sir I'm really sorry I'm-"

"Explain yourself" he interrupted her pleading.

"Hnnngh...” Clover fought actual tears but finally calmed down. "I... Uhm... Violet and I might be playing... A game..."

"Go on" Satan demanded in a sharp voice.

So Clover took a deep breather, speaking terribly fast in her fear.

"It's a competition. We wanted to see who can touch the most bunny tails over the evening, without the people noticing. Look, it's weird, I'm sorry, Violet has some kind of pompom kink and suggested it and I can't say no to people so I joined, also because it's funny, oh also please don't tell Violet I said anything about a kink, she will kill me."

His glistening greenish eyes kept mustering her flushed red face.

"I'm not satisfied yet."

The girl gave another whine.

"Pleeaase... Dearest Satan, Sir..."

"Keep going..."

"Ah...uhm… Oh lord, my man, oh how I plead for thy mercy, oh mighty Satan...! Thy tail was so tempting, I couldn't resist reaching for it...... And also I suck at this game and need points so desperately...! It was just too perfect of a chance, please forgive m..."

She stopped.

He was smirking at her, his grin almost dripping with this sly and cocky attitude.

Clover only now felt how there was something else in-between his left hand and her wrist.

The key.

And she remembered what Violet had texted her earlier today.

"... Did you trick me? The key wasn't actually hard to grab, was it?" she asked. “You knew I would try to touch your tail.”

His smirk widened.

"Why the fascination with bunny tails?" Satan nonchalantly ignored her questions.

"... They're fluffy..." Clover mumbled bashfully. "Just... fun to play with, y'know...?"

The blond tilted his head. "Never played with one."

"... Try it, it's nice."

"Yes, I would like to" he said, enjoying the flustered mess underneath him as she tried to figure out what he was implying. "Right now" he added.

So Clover tried to stand up... But Satan wasn't letting her.

"Uhm... I-I would let you touch mine, b-but... Could I stand up first...?"

"No."

Silence.

Probably the only thing audible was Clover's boiling head as she slowly raised her hips off the ground, constantly being focused by those sly eyes of his.

One of his hands let go of her arm, reaching down while his whole body lowered slightly as well.

Instead of reaching for her back, however, he first placed his hand on her thigh. Through her fishnet stockings, she felt his touch wandering up her leg, only then he'd brush over her side to her back, finally finding the bunny tail in his grip.

"Interesting" he mused, poking and squishing the pompom as he pleased, visibly amused at her embarrassment. "Yes, very-"

They heard the office's door falling shut.

Both, Satan and Clover, stopped in their motion, even in their breathing, as footsteps came closer.

"My jacket... Where did I leave my jacket..."

They were staring at each other first, then at the person casting a shadow on them.

And... well...

Luke stared back.

Stared at the demon bending over the human, the human arching closer to the demon, touching each other in those... those clothes...!

The angel could only press out some dying squeaking noises as his face exploded in an outraged blush. He took a step back, raising an arm as if shielding himself from the evil.

"S... S-s..."

Clover was the first to move again.

"Luke, this is not what-"

"SIMEEOOOOOONN....!"

Aaand Luke ran out of the room in a great whine. Slowly getting over the shock, Clover let out a sigh.

"... He's going to arrange some exorcism for me now, ain't he..." she mumbled.

The demon only gave a chuckle. "Serves you right" he hummed.

"Wha-?! You're the one who start..." her voice gave in immediately after meeting again with this almost sadistic stare.

"S-s-stop... Satan... Since wh-when are y..." Clover stuttered as the demon continued to play with her tail.

He leaned in closer.

"You should know that trying to play pranks on me will always backfire thrice as much..." he purred into her ear.

Then, Satan let go, pulling back and rising onto his feet.

"Well, I think that is enough of a punishment for now. I'll go and bring Lord Diavolo his key."

Clover sat up as well, but her legs were way too wobbly to do any more than that.

She glanced up at him, seeing him wave a goodbye.

"See you around" he hummed, adding a little wink before heading out of the room.

-----------------------

About another hour had passed when Clover and Violet decided to check up in Diavolo again...

Clover: Lord Diavolo, how is the game going?

Diavolo: Good! I have 62 points so far.

Clover: WHAT

Violet: U-uhm... May I ask how you got to have so many...?

Diavolo: I asked Barbatos to let me touch his tail.

Clover: ... For all of the points?

Diavolo: Yes :)

Violet: ...

Diavolo: What is wrong? Is that not a good score?

Clover:

It is... But... We actually had made some rules that we didn't get to explain...

Diavolo: Oh! Which would be? :)

Violet: Uhm... For example, you are not allowed to squeeze the same tail twice in a row, and the target is not supposed to notice you...

Clover: Meaning... If you simply touched Barbatos' tail 31 times in a row with him knowing... You would have... No points yet...

Violet: ...

Clover: ...

Diavolo: :(

----------

Ironic enough, Diavolo had been taking a break in the staff room while texting.

Minutes later, Barbatos came in to bring him something to drink.

"Barbatos! You are not allowed to notice me anymore when I touch your tail. Apparently I did it wrong the whole time!"

"Of course, my lord" the butler answered, the slightest smirk glistening in his eyes.

Diavolo noticed immediately, pointing out how Barbatos looked way more relaxed than usual.

"Oh, do I?" Barbatos tilted his head. "Well, it certainly is a weight off my shoulders to have a crew to rely on. For most parts, at least."

He was heading for the exit already.

"And I am glad to see you are enjoying yourself, my lord" he smiled. "I will have to thank those girls for that..."

----------------------

Violet was working at the bar.

Lucifer had promised her to teach her some cocktail mixing, and there they were.

Turns out she was learning quickly, and the demon soon entrusted her with serving drinks to actual customers. Keeping an eye on her, Lucifer watched as Violet worked, also receiving help from Asmo.

... Which was impressive, by the way, because anyone could sense that Asmo had been sneaking some drinks here and there, and was getting a little... Tipsy.

It showed at one point, though. A customer came up, asking for a drink rather difficult to mix.

"I can do this!" Violet assured her friends and started mixing the juice.

But just as Violet was bending down to put some ice cubes into the drink...

They heard -- and Violet felt -- a slap that was audible even despite the quite loud music playing.

And everyone around them went quiet.

Blinking, Violet straightened her back again, turning to find Asmo behind her.

"Did. You just."

"Slap your ass? Fuck yes I did!"

"Asmo!!"

"Come on, you CAN'T expect me to NOT go for that booty when you're stretching it RIGHT into my FACE."

Lucifer next to them barged in. "But you can't just do th-"

"It was on INSTINCT" Asmo said.

"What do you mean, instinct?!" Violet asked, her face still in a slight blush.

"Oh my godddd, I'm the avatar of LUST, if I see a cute butt I just can't help it!"

"Asmo, that's not okay", Lucifer scolded. "You need to learn to control your sin."

"WHY?! Y'all have your quirks too, why am I not allowed to be myself?! That's so unfair, I always get shouted at! Like, Beel's also snacking our whole storeroom empty but THAT'S fine, huh?!"

Lucifer´s eyes widened. "He's doing WHAT?!"

"And Mammon is stealing money out of the guest's pockets, but NO, let's sue ASMO for giving a booty the appreciation it DESERVES!"

Lucifer looked like he was about to have a stroke. A growl crawled up his throat.

"MAMMOOOOOONNN...!!!"

And he was gone.

Asmo turned to pout somewhere, and Violet was left at the counter, still a little overwhelmed.

The customer slowly raised their hand.

"... Could I... Get my drink now...?"

[lovemalecforever]

Chapter 4

Confrontations and Truths

It was almost 5:30, the dusk was setting in as Alec walked out of his office, mumbling something under his breath. He looked around to find a taxi which he got after 5 minutes, then got in and left for Catarina's house.

*At Catarina's apartment*

Catarina was pacing in her living room, glancing at the clock again and again. Her worries were deepening with each passing second when her doorbell rang. Sighing, she waved her hands and opened the door.

Alec walked inside and gave her an apologetic look. "Sorry, Cat! I'm.... 15 minutes late." He said while hugging her gently.

"That's not what I'm concerned about Alec, you asked me to meet you urgently and not tell Magnus about our meeting at all, what's going on!?"

He was about to answer when a soft voice echoed the whole house.

"Aallleeecccc!"

Madzie came running down the hall and hugged Alec's leg who was around Alec's waist height now. She was growing faster and learned a lot in all these years. Catarina had officially adopted her, and they formed a really great bond over the course of years.

A wide smile appeared on Alec's face as he bent down to her height and gave her a tight hug. "Hey, sweet pea!"

"Magnus didn't come?" She asked in a sad voice.

"No, sweet pea, I had some important work with your mom, that's why I came. We'll surely come soon to meet you, okay?"

"Okay!" she said enthusiastically, her sadness completely gone.

"Hey Mads! Go to your room sweetheart, we have some important work to discuss." Catarina said to her softly but a slight tone of worry was visible in her voice.

"Okay mommy, bye Alecc!"

"Bye, sweet pea!"

After she left, Catarina sighed, crossed her arms above her chest, and glared at Alec. "Alec! Are you going to tell me what's going on?"

"Cat! Calm down, can we please sit and talk?"

Catarina sighed yet again. They walked towards her mini balcony where there was a coffee table with two wooden chairs placed around it. She waved her hands and summoned a hot coffee for herself and hot chocolate with marshmallows for Alec.

"Thank you!" Alec said as he sat down on the chair.

Catarina was still looking at him firmly.

"So, to answer your question, Magnus is not fine."

"What!? Alec! What happened to him, has his powers-"

"Cat! Cat! Calm down! There's nothing wrong with him. He's completely fine, he's just not fine emotionally."

"Emotionally!?"

"Look, Cat, it's our anniversary in 6 days, I want to do something for him for which I'll be needing the help of a warlock, and I obviously can't take Magnus' help, so that's why I wanted to meet you."

Catarina let out a breath of relief, which she didn't know was holding. "Alec, I'm still confused, how is Magnus' mental health and your surprise plan related?"

Alec took a deep breath and composed himself before speaking. "You're aware of the biggest attack that happened in Alicante about a month ago, which almost resulted in war?"

"Yes, Alec, I obviously am, that's the reason I'm in Alicante. They needed the powerful warlocks from around the globe to fix the broken wards, you know it really well those are no ordinary wards. But, what about it?" a frown appeared on her forehead, not understanding where this was headed.

"Well, in that attack, I was in the field and Magnus was also called. It was not a small attack so they called everyone that can fight that battle. We both were on the field fighting side by side, but..." Alec cleared his throat, his eyes starting to flood with tears with those memories.

"Alec?" Catarina asked softly.

Alec closed his eyes and a teardrop fell on his cheek. "I... I almost died in that battle."

"What!?" Catarina's eyes went wide. "Oh my god! Alec... why nobody told me about this!? Why am I hearing about it now?"

"You were at the Spiral Labyrinth, Cat. We wouldn't be able to contact you even if we wanted. And, you know Magnus, he hates talking about things like these."

Catarina sighed and gave a slow nod.

"Anyways, I was in a coma for 10 days. My recovery was really slow, but I recovered. I knew Magnus was by my side the whole time, I was able to hear him, hear everything happening beside me, I heard him crying, begging me to wake up, to not leave him this soon, that... he won't be able to live without me, he cried on my arms, didn't sleep for a day!" He paused as tears kept running down his face.

Catarina gently squeezed his arms.

"When I recovered and went back home, he didn't allow me to go back to work for days. I had to convince him, remind him that I'm an inquisitor, I don't have that much fieldwork now, but... he never was able to get over it." He took a deep breath and continued.

"He told me he was fine, but I know he's not Cat! He still cries at night, thinking I'm asleep and not hearing him. whenever I've come home early, I've heard him crying, saying things like... like I'll die someday in a battle or I'll grow old one day and die and leave him forever. But I've always ignored it, knowing that I won't be able to comfort him no matter how hard I try to. And also, because he thinks he's hiding from me. If I confront him, he'll become defensive and more secretive, he'll push me away."

He closed his eyes and let out a deep breath. Catarina reached out and gave his shoulder a light squeeze. When he opened his eyes, tears were shining brightly in them.

"I... I can't see him like that, Cat! He had a past full of pain, he had been in and out of relationships, had bad ones like Camille. You know all about it better than me, I know he's scared that I'll grow old one day and die. My mortality is scaring him, I love him and I'm worried about him."

"Oh my! Alec... I can't believe Magnus didn't say a word to me. But how can I help you with this?"

"I... Is... I... I... Is...."

"Alec!?" Catarina frowned, her mind going only in one direction with Alec's confrontation.

"I want to become immortal!" He announced.

At first, Catarina's eyes went wide, but then a light smile appeared on her face. "Look, Alec, I'm happy to see the love you have for Magnus, but becoming immortal-"

"It's not just for Magnus, Cat! I'm doing it for myself as well. I want to be with Magnus forever. I can't think of being apart from him even for a day, and, about watching my whole family dying in front of my eyes, with Magnus being by my side, I know I'll handle it!"

Catarina was so awestruck by his determination. 'Magnus is really lucky to have Alec, I'm so happy for you Magnus Bane!' she thought. "But there's one more problem, Alec, you have pure angel blood running in your veins, if you want to become immortal-"

"You think I came without homework, Cat!?" He took out a piece of paper from his pants pocket and kept it on the table. She took it and carefully opened it but then her eyes went wide.

"Wha... Alec, from where did you get this?"

"I was looking through the history of Shadowhunters and Immortals when I got this. The only thing I got to know this far is that," he pointed at the sketch on paper, "his name was Kasper Windermere, the first Shadowhunter to become immortal, half angel and half Shadowhunter, he became half-angel through a spell, but I'm not able to find the rest of it."

Catarina's eyes were wide. Noticing that, Alec took her hand in his catching her attention.

"Look, Cat, I want to become immortal, but Shadowhunting is my life, my career, it's what I've taught since childhood, I can't just give up on it. And I know I'll regret if I become immortal by using demon blood, you all know me. So that's the only option I have. Please, help me Cat!"

She couldn't help but give a wide smile at Alec.

"What? Why are you looking at me like that?"

"You know, Magnus has been my best friend for centuries, I've seen him falling in and out of love, being with people, caring for them, and getting heartbroken but I've never seen anyone caring for Magnus the way you do. Magnus is really lucky to have you in his life. I'm really happy for both of you."

Alec's cheeks flushed red at this. "Thank you, Cat!"

"But for what you want, we need to search in every place possible. We can start with Book of White; Magnus gave it to me to keep it safe, I'll bring it."

"Okay, let's do it."

-----------------------------------------------------------------

* A Few hours later*

"There's only a small part of the spell mentioned in it, Alec." Catarina rubbed her temples as she turned the book towards Alec. They searched for hours but were only able to find a few details.

"Hmm... but that means it's possible right? We just need to find the rest of it." He was really happy with their findings.

"Alec, are you really sure? There's little mention of it, and... it's written there that it has consequences, that's why it's removed."

"What consequences?" He frowned.

"This spell is irreversible, so you can never turn back to mortal ever again and the only means that can kill you is.... is your own will, as an angel you'll only die when you desire to be."

"How is the other one a consequence?" He asked, confused.

"Alec, no one desires to die, and there's no mention whether Kasper Windermere is alive or dead."

"I don't see any problem with any of the above!"

Catarina sighed. "You are so determined, aren't you?"

"Cat, I can't see Magnus like this anymore. With our anniversary coming, I want to surprise him in the best way possible. I want our anniversary to be about him, his happiness, and I know he'll be happy, so yes, I'm determined to do anything which will make him happy. I'll look for more information tomorrow at Gard's library."

Catarina grinned then out of nowhere, giving him a tight hug. "Magnus Bane is a hell of a lucky man!"

Alec pulled out of the hug but then his eyes fell on his watch, it was 10:30. "Shit! Oh, no! Shit! Shit!"

"Alec, what happened?"

"We planned a dinner at 7 today and it's 10:30, Magnus is going to kill me, I need to run!" He said in a hurried tone.

Catarina laughed and shook her head. "Go, get your husband Alec!"

"Bye, Cat!" With that, Alec rushed out of Catarina's house.

__________________________

Magnus was pacing in their living room, eyeing the cold food kept at the kitchen counter and at the clock alternatively. It was almost 10:45. His eyes were filled with the pool of tears that were ready to shed at any moment.

'Where are you, Alexander? You promised you'd make it for dinner.' He sighed and started pacing again when a sudden thought struck him. 'Is... Is he all right? Did something happen to him? Did he go for the hunt? No, No! But he should be home by now then!'

He was about to change into his regular clothes to go out in search of him when he heard the jingle of keys and the door opened making him let out a breath of relief.

Alec walked in and noticed that Magnus was standing in the center of the living room with worry-filled eyes. 'Shit! I'm screwed' he thought then cleared his throat before speaking.

"I'm sorry, Magnus, I... Umm... I...." He kept shuffling in his place, unable to meet the eyes with his husband's.

"Where were you, Alexander?" Magnus almost choked on his words.

Alec noticed this, 'he was crying again, shit! I'm sorry Mags. Just a few more days and you never have to worry about it ever again' he thought.

"I... I was actually with Izzy; she was at the meeting too... I met her after a long time, so after we were both done with our work and meetings we decided to meet for a coffee. We met and started chatting and didn't realize the time. I'm sorry Mags! I should've texted you, I forgot, I'm really sorry." He said half truthfully, Izzy was at the meeting, but she was in a hurry so they only talked for 5 minutes, then she left but she's still in Alicante.

He then took out the flower bouquet he was hiding the whole time, with a sorry card placed on top of it. "I hope this will make up for it, I'm so sorry Magnus!"

Magnus was completely on the verge of crying right now, he was trying to hold his tears back, as he kept glancing between the bouquet and his husband. 'I missed my chance again, how am I supposed to say anything when you keep doing things like this' he thought, unable to keep his tears back he started crying.

"Magnus!?" Alec kept the bouquet on the couch then hugged him tightly. "I'm sorry Magnus, I'm sorry!" 'I know why you're crying Magnus, please don't be scared love, just a few more days!'

Magnus cried on Alec's shoulders, holding his jacket in his fists tightly. 'how am I supposed to tell you, Alexander, how am I supposed to tell you that... that I want to end our marriage, that I want to end us. I can't take it anymore, thinking that you'll be gone forever someday, and I, I'll have to live with those memories. I can't create more memories with you, Alexander. What happened a month ago had hurt me in ways you can't imagine. I can't do this anymore, the more I'll be with you, the more it'll hurt me when you'll be gone. I won't be able to bear that pain, I have to end us, I need to end us, but how am I even going to say it, when you keep showering me with your love' he cried harder on his shoulders.

[pistachoz]

legally blonde, tenth doctor

pairing: tenth doctor x fem!reader

synopsis: between trips and adventures with the doctor, you finally find the perfect timing to change your look. with no pointless dress codes to follow anymore, you try dyeing your hair on your own, ending up in a string of botched outcomes and unexpected confessions.

wc: 3K

warnings: none, mild cursing maybe??

author's note: oof, this took me more than i expected and it definitely ended up being waaay more. anyway, this is my first piece of writing for the doctor -also in general- and what a better way than start with a fluffy one! i hope it turned out decent! my first language it’s not english, so you can expect some -more like a lot of- writing mistakes.

also, a big shout out to @plxstic-rose​ bc she has been my biggest supporter when i felt like i couldn’t do this, she has helped me so much ily 🥺 💞

(GIF IS MINE)

A grimace appeared on your face as the sour taste of the coffee filled your mouth, you definitely needed to bring yours the next time you stopped on earth because the alien version of it tasted like stomach bile. You weren't even sure if it had proper caffeine or it was drug-fueled tea.

With a resigned sigh, you put the cold mug in the mirrored vanity table in front of you and checked your phone. Five minutes more and you would be rinsing the red dye out of your shower cap covered hair. You lift the right side of the cap slightly, trying to peek at your tinted hair, the pale red -almost blonde- pigments made your breath hitch in a halt.

Was it supposed to look that light? Oh crap, you should have gone to the salon.

That was actually going to be the original plan. You had been procrastinating changing your look; nothing wrong with the colour and length you normally had but since you started travelling with the doctor, you didn't count with office regulations to follow anymore so you considered shaking up a bit your aesthetic. Yet, it seemed as you could never stop to take a breath and the times you did, was always on strange-named planets where your peaceful state of mind lasted a couple of minutes. So, you took it upon yourself to change your look on your own. You knew it could have any sort of downfall, but you didn't really want to nag the doctor into making a 'short' stop on earth -even though you knew he wouldn't mind- just for a date at the salon. He needed a well-deserved rest after all the uncontrollable lifesaving shenanigans and every time you came back to earth, somehow you ended up enticing some sort of trouble.

Besides, how hard could it be, right?

You barged into the installed bathroom connected to your room and locked the door as soon as you stepped inside. The last thing you needed was for the doctor to burst in looking for you while you were in the middle of this crucial transformation, and even though he was probably too distracted tinkering around the console of the TARDIS, you knew how intrusively spontaneous he could be when he finds something new. It wouldn't be a first to hear him enter your bedroom in a spur-of-the-moment with enthusiastic hand gestures and euphoric rants about alien-y stuff.

You grabbed the light blue hand-sized towel that rested upon the toilet tank and draped it around your shoulders. A jittery feeling building up in the pit of your stomach at the prospect of how your new hair would look like.

You weren't particularly bold when it came to your style, always stuck with what you could call an average look, to be fair, before the doctor, your whole life was just brimming with a never-ending stodgy routine that encased every aspect of your life. You didn't see the point of making more than few changes in your image and it was not like your office let you go too risky either.

This was going to be the first radical change in your appearance, and you were lying if you didn't say a fit of excitement was already bubbling up your throat. You didn't know what exactly had gotten into you, but you were so adamant to do something. Perhaps it was the stockpiled adrenaline from all those adventures catching up on you, perhaps this was something you were going to regret later. Either way, right now, you could only think of how satisfying it would be to finally match your current lifestyle. New and thrilling.

To be completely honest, you were also eager to see the doctor's reaction. Of course, you were not doing this because of him…well, not for the best part, but a piece of you wished it would have some sort of effect on him.

You knew this regeneration was cheekier and maybe you were reading too much between the lines but sometimes you could swear there was something more in all those subtle touches and lingering hugs. The shared gazes that let you wonder if this was just some friendly treatment or if he really meant something deeper made your mind go into a frenzy.

You also knew that appearances didn't really matter to him but the need of looking bolder and more luring was still there. You wanted, for once and for all represent how traveling with him had changed you into someone who would risk more than just a ‘change of look´. You were becoming the best version of yourself and you wanted to show him that in more than one way, but one step at the time.

Warily, you lifted the plastic cap; your sticky hair popping in every direction. Without a prior look, you stooped over the sink and manoeuvred your head under the sprout. After some unsuccessful tries, you managed to open it and began massaging your scalp with your fingertips.

After swilling away the shampoo and applying the conditioner; you grasped the towel laying around your shoulders and swaddled your hair up in a turban.

You straighten your back and stroked your hair through the towel, trying -quite poorly- to pump it dry. You didn't anticipate it to be this gruelling. In fact, you thought this would be some sort of restful hiatus from your general tense state, but apparently, this had drained you more than expected.

Resignedly, you undid the coiled towel on top of you and let your new dyed hair fall freely behind you. The air fell out of your lungs and your stomach dropped when you stared at the sight of your reflection.

You were blonde. Blonde.

What in the name of god did you do? You were so sure you followed every instruction of the flipping tint box in lockstep- well, judging by the results, you obviously had made a mistake at some point, maybe even skipped one, but how catastrophic had it been that you ended up looking like a defective version of a Weasley that had awfully light shrimp coloured hair.

A trembling neigh-like sound left your mouth when you touched the ends of your hair. What were you supposed to do now? You didn't even have any dye left to apply another layer and asking the doctor for help was ruled out. He couldn't see you like this. Nobody could see you like this, for your dignity's sake.

This was all on you. You needed to think of something. Anything.

Hats, of course! The TARDIS must’ve a good stash of those, you knew you could find something in the never-ending wardrobe. That thing was three times bigger than your flat.

Well, problem solved. You were going to use a hat until your hair grew enough to cut it or until you stopped on earth again and got the chance to go to a proper hairdresser.

Good god, who were you kidding? This was a mess.

With shaky fingers, you fumble your way out the bathroom and dashed out of your room, in search for your only resource.

---

"You won't believe what I found underneath the floor panel!" You heard the doctor's elated voice buzzing through your room before he could even fling your door wide open.

All you managed to convey was a muffled hum through your pillowed-smashed face. Too tired sulking the crime you made to your hair to turn around from your current position. Your limp body was sprawled all over the bed; arms and legs stretched at your sides with your face buried deep down the mattress.

Without waiting for a proper response, he roved across your room and resumed his explanation of his oh-so-great discover with a shit-eating grin.

You didn't need to see him to know the already too familiar gestures he was making. You could picture with the most minimal detail how his eyes would sparkle with wonder and how a contagious gleam dotted the signature boyish grin he always wore.

You smiled fondly.

You could still remember thoroughly the first time you saw him in all his glory, ranting about scientific stuff you could not understand and even though you had never seen the man before, the brightness on his eyes and the insatiable curiosity he radiated made you grin almost immediately.

You sat up slowly; grunting when you stretched your arms upwards. You moved your head from side to side, trying to stir yourself up completely awake.

"…So technically, it should be able to make the TARDIS' chameleon barrier unfroze. Well... the possibilities are thirteen out of a hundred, but I-" He stopped mid-sentence when he turned around and saw you sitting on the edge of the bed.

He tilted his head slightly to the side and a puzzled look crossed his face like he was trying to figure out what was out of place with you.

Your heart skipped a beat.

Thankfully, you had managed to find a Kangol black bucket hat. It was pretty simple; a small metal fuchsia arrow was stamped on the front and the brim was big enough to fit all of your hair inside. Still It was just not your style. Well, the other option was an animal print floppy one, the type that Lady gaga would wear. So, you had to settled with the e-girl-angsty-teen looking.

"That's new" His left eyebrow quirked curiously.

"What?" Good job; try playing dumb and maybe like that he won’t notice it.

"The hat, I- " he made a circular motion around his head "I don't think I've seen you wear one before"

"Oh, I um- wanted to try something different?" You stated but the wince in your voice made it sound more like a question.

“Right, yeah” he rushed "It's not like it doesn't suit you"

"Right" You fidgeted absent-minded with the hem of your sweatshirt, trying to think of something to break the awkwardness “So… you were saying?”

"Oh yes!" a playful glint overtaking his features “I think I found a way to repair the malfunction on the chameleon circuit and hopefully it will be better than that time I tried a block transfer computation. I was so close, well- not that close but at least I managed to build a part of the outer plasmic shell. Anyways, if we are lucky enough, we could stop travelling around looking like a 'blue box'" he raised his eyebrows, a devilish smile gracing his lips.

“Hold on, didn’t you say it was kind of unsafe?”

"Oh no, don’t worry! It’s danger-free… for the most part, well actually, it’s a 4 out of ten, maybe 5. But I’m sure the old girl can handle- "

A shrilling alarm started echoing through the TARDIS’ walls and you almost fell out of the bed when the floor started shaking uncontrollably. The doctor stumbled upon his own feet and with strained struggle and held out his hand to help you up.

"You were saying?" You muttered, sarcasm dripping from your voice.

With one hand locked onto the doctor's and the other extended to keep balance in the middle of the tremble, you managed to head out of your room. As soon as you stepped outside, you were greeted with red flashing lights going off all around the TARDIS.

"Careful" You heard the doctor called out, his voice barely perceivable. You had to double check to understand his next words "We need to get to the console"

Both of you tried the hardest to advance without falling or tripping over. The din of your footsteps lost in the middle of the shrieking noise. You could feel the vibration of the walls crawling to your brain and rumbling. The longer you spend running, the sharper the dizziness became.

You felt his hand clasp yours tighter when you decreased your speed; a warm feeling squeezed its way through your chest instantly. He looked down at you, a small reassuring smile on his lips; he was going to solve this.

When you finally reached the control room, the doctor leaped his way towards the console. A string of garbled mumbling fell under his breath, which you were more than certain you wouldn’t understand even if he spoke up. You saw him go around the panel, flicking switches and pressing buttons but it didn’t lessen a bit the state you were in.

You stood next to the entrance holding onto the railing for dear life. Maybe you should have been trying to do something useful, but quite frankly you had no clue as to what was going on. And even if you could have done something, there was no way of giving more than a few steps without falling.

After several confused exclamations and scrunched up faces from the doctor, he stumbled his way to the other side of the room and kneeled next to an opened floor tile. He plunged into what used to be a makeshift storage and with a newfound enthusiasm, you heard him shout. "Found it!"

He reappeared back on sight and held a small cassette-looking thing, his hair sticking up in a messier way than usual and a triumphant grin spreading on his features "The resetting format key should be able to stabilize us."

With a quick motion, he stood up but before he could head back towards the console to plug it in, an abrupt shook threw the both of you across the room. You saw the doctor’s figure fall hovering over a coral column next to the panel as you held tight on the railing stronger, attempting unsuccessfully to stand still.

Maybe if you hadn't been distracted watching how the doctor got up and toss his weird-looking key into one of the TARDIS’ inputs, you would have noticed how your apparently well-put-cap was now laying on the floor a few meters away from you. And maybe, if you hadn’t been so awestruck at how quickly the room returned to its normal state with golden cozy lights shining from the ceiling, you would have notice your now-bright blonde hair flowing behind your back without a care in the world.

"Right, so it looks like the TARDIS went into some sort of safe mode." He spoke a little out of breath, arms still hunched over the panel "but it's okay now. Apparently, it was a defense response, she thought it we were under a- "

He turned around slowly but stopped dead on tracks when his eyes landed on you, or more specifically- on your hair. His once furrowed eyebrows were now raised, almost touching his hairline and open awestruck eyes were looking at you like you were an unknown species. A breathtaking unknown species.

He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out. Every part of his body was just not responding, it was like he had stopped functioning properly. His unblinking eyes were glued to your face and his agape mouth looked almost comical; you would have taken out your phone in that moment just to snap a picture if your brain hadn’t been dozing off at the reason for his reaction. Because what could possibly- Shit.

Shit. Shit. Shit.

You moved your gaze to the ground, eyes falling on the discarded hat near the entrance. You pursed your lips, thoughts running a mile per hour. When did it fell? Why weren’t you careful enough? This was the doctor’s fault. Yeah, all his fault. He had to come with his incredibly soft hair and that flipping sweet smile that made your toes curl up and your heartbeat race like there was no tomorrow. He had to come and distract you, oh and of course, bringing a mess along the way.

God! This was not helping.

“You- um, you are…blonde” Yeah, no shit, sherlock.

“I-…am I?” The breathy words rasping out, your mouth felt as dried as the Sahara and you were surprised a sound came out at all.

“You look-”

“I know” You close your eyes and shook your head, praying to whatever entity out there to swallow you up and throw you to the Bahamas “it wasn’t supposed-“

“I like it” he blurted out “I know you don’t need any sort of validation and I’m not trying to- what I-” He starting flapping his hands around in a cartoon-like gestures “you look stunning… truly stunning; not that you weren´t before. I mean, the colour really does suit you but I’ve always thought- blonde, not blonde, you’ve always been beautiful… Guess what I’m trying to say is that when you love someone, there’s really nothing that can make you look at them differently. Did you know that As’urs considered blonde people holy? Well they would if there were blonde people. Sorry, totally off topic, but they do. Everyone there is blue-haired. And there’s a lot of mystical myths and clergy influence involved but basically everything golden is sacred for them. If we go, they might even crown you as their queen.”

He looked like a deer caught in headlights. You could imagine the red alarms in his brain going off, trying to process what fell out of his mouth moments prior and desperately attempting to conjure something up but instead just causing a short circuit in the process. To be completely honest, you weren’t any better.

You felt your heart bumping up your throat and your skin grew hotter and hotter per second. You swore you could feel the maniac rhythm of your pulse piercing through your head and you were quite sure you looked like a pop-eyed toy from one of those claw machines at the funfair, with eyes nearly falling out of your skull.

Because he didn’t really say that, right? Your mind must’ve been playing some sick game with you. There was no way, he really-

“What?” It was all you managed to muster; your small voice barely hearable.

“Huh?” You saw the redness from his cheek expand through all the visible skin.

“What did you just say?”

“That As’urs would consider you a goddess?” He asked hesitant with a guilty expression.  

“No- before that”

“That the blonde hair looks good on you?”

“No! I-“ You took a small breath “Do you love me?”

You could sense the confidence returning to him like a tidal wave, a serious expression overtaking his features, but with a softness you couldn’t comprehend. “I always have”

Your legs seemed to move on their own, carrying you towards him. You stopped when your noses were almost touching and you could feel his hot ragged breath fall on your eyelashes. With hesitation, you placed your hands on his arms and looked up, letting yourself fall on those brown pools you have grown to love.

“Doctor…” you whispered

You had no idea what made you do it, but you moved your hands to his cheeks, and you kissed him. It was impulsive and stupid, and something you’d expect a sixteen-year-old girl do on her prom night. But you did it without a second thought. And for a moment you felt the doctor grow incredibly still, mouth unmoving and eyes wide open, until you placed your soothing fingers on the back of his neck, thumbs caressing and drawing invisibles circles on his sideburns.

And so, he gave in; firm hands grasping your hips and pressing you flush against him. His mouth spilling raw passion and his insides melting at the soft contact of your delicate lips. The tenderness on his touches and intensity of his lips drawing out all those words that didn’t need saying, because you knew. He was so sure you knew.

An involuntary whimper left your lips when he broke the kiss and intertwined his hands with yours. He brought your joined hands nearer and placed a light kiss to your knuckles.

“Did I mention I like your hair?” A husky laugh fell from your lips and your eyes sparkled when he gave you a soft smile that would be imprinted on your brain for the rest of your life.

When he looked at you with those old eyes that sung you stories in the most beautiful way imaginable and his swollen lips ghosted a smile you knew things were going to be better, with new adventures and new experiences awaiting on your door. And you had the whole time and space at your disposal to face it together.

author's note pt.2: OK that was a lot, honestly the ending got sloppy and there’s probably a lot of bad editing, but I invented a whole new alien species, so hey! kudos for that I guess. anyway, i hope you like it! and as always, feedback would be really appreciated, a comment or a like would mean the world to me! like my description says, requests are open! but It would probably take ages for me to finish it, so please patience. right now I have some more doctor who drafts and also some marvel ones!

-love, rina xx

[morganaspendragonss]

Bad Things Happen Bingo Masterpost!

And that's a wrap on my @badthingshappenbingo card! Thanks to anybody and everybody who requested a square - this has been so, so fun! I've had this card for years and have been actively working on it for a year and a half, so it's incredible to have finally finished it 🥰

Prompts and Fills listed below the cut:

Used in Sacrifice/Ritual - Filled

you would be the one to rescue me | BBC Atlantis | Jason x Pythagoras

When Jason wakes, Pythagoras is gone.

This in itself is not so strange. What is strange, however, is that his cloak has been left behind despite there being a significant chill in the air. And when Hercules begins to wake, and there is still no sign, Jason knows.

Something's wrong.

Rage Against the Reflection - Filled

out, damned spot | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

TK wakes up gasping, choking on air. The sheets are suffocating him and, when he tries to free himself, they only seem to get tighter. The hands reaching out for him, trying to calm him, are the final straw; TK throws himself from bed and sprints to the bathroom, slamming and locking the door behind him as he collapses against the sink.

On some level, he is aware that the hands were Carlos’s, that the sheets were theirs, that his hands are clean, and that the dream was just a dream.

But they weren't always that way.

Falling Through the Ice - Filled

ice in my veins | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

Carlos only turns away for a second, he swears. Unfortunately, a second is clearly ample time for his boyfriend to get into trouble because when Carlos turns back around, TK is no longer standing where he left him.

Instead, there’s a sizable hole in the ice.

Flashbacks - Filled

start again from the beginning | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK & Owen

Owen trusts his son. He’s watched TK fight his addiction and stay sober for the last six years, and he has faith that he can handle himself.

But when TK doesn’t show up for work the night after proposing to Alex, Owen knows that something is wrong. After all, they've been here before.

Branding - Filled

setting fire to our insides for fun | Supernatural | Meg x Cas

Cas had been prepared to find demons. Frankly, he would have been concerned if he didn’t find demons, given that that was his mission here. What he hadn’t been prepared for, however, was to find two demons torturing another, pressing the hot end of a branding iron into her forearm.

He killed the two torturers with practised ease, barely wasting a moment before they were both on the dirty, wooden floor, eyes burned out their sockets. Only then did he allow his surprise to catch up to him, breathing heavily as his gaze settled on someone he hadn’t seen in a long time.

Meg.

Memory Loss - Filled

focal point | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

Waking up in the hospital is becoming all too familiar. Being the one in the bed is less so, but Carlos has had his fair share of hospital trips. He knows the drill.

As soon as he sees him awake, TK breaks out in harsh sobs. "Carlos," he breathes. "I... I thought I'd lost you."

Caught in an Explosion - Filled

can we skip past near death cliches? | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

It’s the kind of call every first responder dreads. A bomb threat in an apartment block, civilian’s lives on the line, the whole situation a hair’s breadth away from disaster. And Carlos is right in the middle of it.

tw: explosions, bombs

Forced to Kneel/Bow - Filled

in case you don’t live forever (let me tell you now) | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

His teammates were still sitting in the communal area when TK entered, eyes glued to the tv screen. Paul was the first to notice him, and TK’s concern only grew as he got everyone else’s attention, their worried gazes falling on him one by one.

“There’s a hostage situation at that big, fancy hotel across town," Marjan explained. "Apparently it’s pretty serious, they’ve had to send police in, and, um, well…”

Marjan paused, and TK felt dread wash through him, knowing what her next words would be.

“Carlos is there, TK. He’s gone in.”

tw: references to gun violence

Be Careful What You Wish For - Filled

can you beat back the night? | The Witcher | Geralt x Jaskier

He misses the bard. Geralt won’t admit it, not even to Roach, but he misses him. After months—years—of Jaskier’s constant chatter and the sound of his lute, the silence, once valued above all else, is too much.

It’s been months since the dragon, since Geralt lost both Yennefer and Jaskier in one fell swoop. He’s cursed himself many times over for the words he said—to both of them—and cursed himself more for the mistakes he made to get in this position in the first place.

*

this is the lot of witchers, to be alone.

Blood From the Mouth - Filled

I Got You | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos, TK & 126 Crew

“I’m just sayin’,” Judd says, waving his arms around. “Somebody’s gonna get themselves killed in there one of these days. I had to come out here three times last year because of some idiots who think they know better than the ‘Keep Out’ signs.”

The team are called to an abandoned house where some kids are trapped. Everything is going smoothly, which, naturally, means that it won't be that way for much longer.

Trapped in a Burning Building - Filled

a little unsteady | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

9-1-1, What's your emergency?

'Please, help! My house is on fire and my husband’s inside!'

or

t.k. sometimes wonders if the universe is out to get him

Worked Themselves to Exhaustion - Filled

In Your Arms | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos, Michelle & TK

T.K. and Carlos agreed when they started dating to check-in on each other that they were both okay. Reassurance that nothing bad had happened. So, when Carlos hasn't replied hours after his shift is supposed to have finished, T.K.'s definitely beginning to panic. 

Locked in a Cage - Filled

running out of time | Shadowhunter Chronicles | Kit x Ty

When (if) they got out of here, Kit wanted the record to unequivocally state that this wasn’t his fault. Not that it was Ty's either, but it certainly wasn't Kit's.

or

kit and ty's first hunt together after three years goes wrong and they wind up trapped in a cage with no way out. naturally, this leads to a heartfelt conversation.

Demonic/Ghostly Possession - Filled

Haunting | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos, TK & Owen

T.K. is five when he first sees a ghost, though, of course, he doesn’t know that it’s a ghost. His name is Joey, and he lives in the playground, which T.K. thought was a little strange, but he doesn’t want to ask. Dad says it’s rude to ask questions like that to someone he’s just met.

Fingore - Filled

ease my mind | 911: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

Briefly, Carlos considers calling TK and telling him about the accident. But… He only broke two of his fingers and it barely even classifies as a minor injury in his book, so there’s really no reason to bother his fiancé while he’s still on shift himself. He pockets his phone then looks around to figure out where the exit is.

Only, an all-too familiar laugh distracts him from his task, drawing his attention to the nurses station.

Where TK is standing, smiling as a nurse swats at him for stealing one of their lollipops.

Carlos is, beyond doubt, fucked.

Verbal Abuse - Filled

this is a song about somebody else | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos, TK & Marjan

TK doesn't notice the 126's latest visitor until it's too late. He freezes as Alex smiles at him, knocked off balance by this sudden intrusion of his old life into his new one.

or

alex vists tk at the 126. luckily, tk has his family to help him through it.

tw: abusive language

Dying in Their Arms - Filled

can you hear me screaming (please don’t leave me) | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

As a cop, Carlos has to deal with all kinds of cases, and not all of them end well. But never in his life did he imagine that he'd have to respond to an incident involving his own boyfriend.

tw: major character death

Blindfolded - Filled

find you here inside the dark | Doctor Who | Thirteen x Yaz

Yaz has walked this room too many times to count now; she’s traced her fingertips over the walls, searching for any cracks or crevices to indicate where there might be a door.

If the Doctor were here, she’d have her sonic out by now, spitting out words, only half of which Yaz could understand. She’d find a way out in no time. Or, if not, at least she’d be here. Talking a mile a minute, probably annoying the hell out of their captors. Yaz can almost hear her now—

Wait.

She can hear her now.

Water Torture - Filled

soggy clothes and breezeblocks | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

Carlos wakes up slowly. He cracks his eyes open, wincing at the pounding in his head. He lifts his hand to massage the pain away, only to discover that his hand won't move, the cool metal of handcuffs biting viciously into his wrist.

After an undercover mission goes wrong, Carlos is forced to fight for his life. And to make matters worse, his kidnappers are making sure that T.K. is watching the entire thing.

tw: torture

Fighting from the Inside - Filled

and curse the gods | BBC Atlantis | Jason & Medusa

Jason knows what it is to be cursed.

Slammed into a Wall - Filled

mind over matter (matter over mind) | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos, TK & Owen

After a night out goes wrong, TK and Carlos are left to deal with the consequences.

tw: homophobia, hate crimes, hiding an injury

Suicide Attempt - Filled

be done with this now | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

Once upon a time, Carlos had thought that watching as his almost-boyfriend was whisked off in an ambulance, bullet wound in his chest, would be the worst moment of his life. Then TK had been kidnapped, and Carlos had spent hours not knowing where he was, if he was alive or dead, and he thought - this is it. Nothing can top this.

But, having to perform CPR on his husband, having to hold him as he slipped away in his arms?

That was worse than even his nightmares.

tw: suicide attempt, suicidal thoughts, depression, drug abuse, overdosing

Bleeding Through the Bandages - Filled

pull you in to feel your heartbeat | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

The call comes at the tail end of Carlos’s shift, and he instantly hates whichever idiot decided to ruin his night by mugging someone.

What he's not expecting is to find his boyfriend on the ground, bleeding out from a stab wound.

Arm in a Sling - Filled

have you been involved in an accident at work? | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK & 126 Crew, TK x Carlos

T.K. was on his way to the hospital. Again.

At least this time he could say with absolute certainty that it 100% wasn't his fault.

Self-Harm - Filled

but god i wanna feel again | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

Carlos blames himself for not noticing. It's not like he had much choice in the matter; he hasn't seen T.K. all week, and his texts have been going unanswered, but he can't help but feel like it's partly his fault.

If only T.K. would actually talk about himself, instead of keeping it all in.

tw: self-harm

[dolphin-enthusiast]

Idk if you've done this before and I've got nothing creative so please could I get some Headcanons for The Bucci Gang if their S/o suddenly disappeared out of thin air. Not bc of a stand or anything, she just disappeared and didn't even say goodbye? What if like years later, they come across their S/o again and if they talk, she seems as though she's never met them before? But she actually has no idea who they are. Weird ik but yeah.

My 🅱️ruh u better give urself more credit bc this is one of the most original ones I’ve gotten so far-

Bruno:

- Once he learns about s/o’s disappearance, he’ll be in constant denial for a few days because he simply cannot (and doesn’t want to) grasp the concept of his partner leaving his side like that out of nowhere. He always tries staying as logical as possible even during stressful situations, therefore he’ll try not to worry too much in the beginning, continuously telling himself that s/o has to pop up soon enough.

- Alas that doesn’t happen and after a week the man is in a damn frenzy. Bruno would start being uncharacteristically stressed as well as slightly more snappy, and the gang would undoubtedly notice it too. The man would then begin to eratically search for his partner left and right, sending his subordinates to investigate the entire city, but all to no avail of course.

- Weeks would turn into months, then months would become years and s/o would still be nowhere to be found. Each second of her not being by his side would absolutely crush Bruno’s poor heart, making the man become significantly more closed off and distant. So just imagine the pure shock that would take over his features once s/o would just pop in out of nowhere one day. The pain would only get worse once he’d realize that for some reason she has no idea who he is. Honestly this would entirely fuck him up and he’ll spend (even more) nights fully awake, thinking about what went wrong and desperately trying to find a reason as to why his s/o decided to leave him one day just like that. To be honest, it would have been better for him if she never showed up again at all.

Giorno:

- Similar to Bruno, as in he doesn’t outright panic and tries going over things logically. He thinks of all sorts of scenarios and reasons as to why his s/o would just disappear out of thin air without even leaving him a message or something before going away. It’s extremely uncharacteristic of her he has to admit, but he still tries to keep a (somehow) optimistic attitude. She HAS to show up sooner or later....right?

- But of course that it doesn’t happen and so he takes it upon himself to go and search for her. At first Gio would think that it was the work of an enemy stand or perhaps the mafia again, but turns out that it wasn’t the case at all. No matter where he went to or who he asked, he just couldn’t find a single trace about s/o’s whereabouts. That’s when he’d start panicking for real and would slowly become more and more sleepless and grief filled. He just doesn’t get why s/o would ever do such a cruel and unexplainable thing.

- Gio would be utterly shocked to randomly spot her one day after so many years, so he’d waste no time and approach her with a hopeful smile. That’s when his heart would get shattered once more, for s/o would be looking at him with the emptiest and most coldest look that he’d ever seen. Gio would ask her dozens of questions, but to no avail. She’d keep claiming that she has no idea who he is and that’s when he’d realize that he truly is hopeless. He’ll bitterly accept the fact that he’ll never get his partner back, but the memories of his past are going to haunt him forever. At this point, it’s almost as if it would have been better if s/o was actually dead. Then again, she is dead to him for sure.

Abbacchio:

- Probably the one who would react in the worst way. Like prepare for maximum fucking angst, because this is one of the quickest ways to COMPLETELY fuck this already damaged man over. It’s already hard enough for him to let people in, so just imagine how hurt and betrayed he’d feel once he’d realize that his s/o suddenly vanished from his life without a trace.

- That’s when Abba would swear to never open up to anyone, and this time he’d REALLY mean it. He already lost someone in the past, so this would be like reliving trauma all over again for him. At this point he won’t even search for her, the man would just completely shut off from everything and everyone and dwell in grief and repressed anger. He feels utterly betrayed and keeps beating himself up for being so foolish as to open up to someone else again. Despite the fact that the rest of the gang would be there for him and trying to get him to loosen up, all of their attempts are sadly going to be in vain.

- So when s/o DOES eventually show up after long and painful years, Abba is going to straight up ignore her. Yes, you heard that right. He wouldn’t even want to look her in the eyes, that’s how spiteful and hurt he still is, even after literal years. And it’s probably for the best anyway, because if he were to find out that she also completely forgot about him, that would have been the last straw honestly. Even to this day, Abbacchio keeps telling himself that things would have been far more bearable if s/o didn’t return at all.

Mista:

- Instant fucking panic. He already worries enough whenever s/o comes home later than usual and all of that, so just imagine the sheer anxiety that would take over the poor man when his partner would be nowhere to be found an entire fucking day. And it would only get worse as more days would go on. At some point he’ll even start crying over and over again and no matter what the rest of his gang would try, it wouldn’t help soothe his nerves at all.

- Mista is going to beg his gang to help him find his s/o and the man will literally lose sleep since he’d be unable to stop his racing thoughts at all times. His mind would keep coming up with countless of complicated and highkey tragic scenarios about his s/o dying or getting kidnapped. I mean, that would be the only logical explanation for her sudden disappearance, right? Why else would she just leave him randomly like that? 

- Once s/o shows up again after literal years, he’s going to burst into tears and immediately run up to hug her only to notice that she’s acting extremely off. This wasn’t the s/o that he knew years ago. What in the world happened? The man would bombard s/o with questions, and when she’d reply that she has no idea who he is Mista is going to have a goddamn aneurysm. That’s when he’d throw tantrum and accuse her of being a liar, starting to rant about how hard the past years have been for him and how hurt he was by her sudden departure, only to be met with another empty look from his now ex partner. Once again, maybe it would have been better if she didn’t return at all.

Fugo:

- Reacts almost as bad as Abbacchio tbh. Fugo doesn’t easily trust, but when he does he TRUSTS so he’d feel twice as betrayed by his partner suddenly leaving him. He’d immediately go into panic mode after a few days so he’ll start desperately seeking answers left and right. Poor man would have EVEN more anger outbursts than usual since he’d be stressed out of his damn mind.

- He would start isolating himself and thinking over this entire situation inside the cold emptiness of his room. Literally everything would start reminding him of his s/o and, although he hates showing emotions, the man would start crying himself to sleep night after night thinking about how lovely it felt to wrap his arms around his partner’s body as he contently drifted off to sleep. But not anymore. All of that was cruelly ripped away from him one day, and something keeps telling him that he’ll never experience it ever again.

- Alas his instinct was right, because the day s/o returns Fugo’s heart is only going to get crushed more. The man would instantly lighten up and would almost cry out of happiness once he’d see her again, starting to run up to her only to stop dead in his tracks when he notices the look on her face. His confusion and anger would only grow as s/o would keep telling him that she has no fucking idea who he is. At this point it would be too much and Fugo would just say fuck it and throw a few nasty curses at her before storming off, tears of disappointment and repressed anger running down his cheeks. Yes, it truly would have been better if she never ever showed up again.

Narancia:

- Immediately freaks out after one mere day passes. He starts looking for her left and right, asking anyone if they seen her or if they know anything about her whereabouts. Hell, he’ll even beg Bruno to help him search for her with the most desperate expression ever plastered on his pained face. In the beginning he would try being as optimistic as possible, constantly reassuring himself that it will all solve itself and that s/o will return at some point.

- But that sadly doesn’t happen, and so poor Narancia would slowly seep into despair more and more with each passing day. Every second in which s/o wasn’t by his side was pure torture for him, and at some point he even started to lose good amounts of sleep because of it. Narancia is not one to be negative usually, but this would cause even him to become pessimistic and even hopeless at some point. He’d be constantly locking himself up in his room, most likely crying as he remembers all the wonderful memories that he made with s/o. If he wasn’t curled up in a corner in his room, he was entirely ignoring everything around him and constantly spacing out in his own dooming thoughts.

- Now, the second he sees s/o again he’s running towards her at the speed of light whilst exclaiming that he knew that she’d come back at some point. But this ain’t no fairytale, so Narancia’s dreams would get crushed once again when he hears s/o confess that she doesn’t know him at all. He’ll take it as a joke at first and try to humor her, only to realize that she was dead serious the entirety of time. That’s when the panic would settle in again and he’d desperately try to make her remember him by showing her pictures or telling her things that only she knew about him, but to no avail. Narancia would start wailing again and he’d dread the day that he met her. Sadly, it would have certainly been better if she didn’t return at all. 

Bonus - Trish:

- Absolutely fucking heartbroken, She had dedicated herself entirely to s/o only to discover that she one day disappeared from her life without a single explanation. Although Trish isn’t usually pessimistic, she’d start beating herself up for s/o’s disappearence since she’d start believing that she somehow did something to upset s/o THAT much that she felt the need to just...leave.

- Similarly to Narancia, Trish would soon enough lose the last bit of hope that she had left and would slowly start shutting off more and more. Her appetite is going to decrease and she’ll start having little to no motivation to do pretty much anything. Bruno would constantly be taking care of her and bringing her food, and his heart would break whenever Trish would weakly refuse it all. Literally no one would be able to cheer her up since she’d be literally fucking depressed.

- The day s/o returns though is going to be an even bigger blow to her already shattered heart. She would be unbelievably happy to see s/o again, and so she’ll start asking her dozens of questions only to be cut off by a cold “and who are you?”. Of course that this would absolutely shock Trish and she’ll be confused as all fuck by s/o’s weird ass behavior, but Trish being Trish, she wouldn’t give up at all and would stubbornly press s/o for answers which would only result in her getting more and more angry when she gets no answers. She cannot comprehend why s/o forgot about her, and honestly it would have been better if she never returned altogether.

[paolaofthewatertribe]

woosung - i don’t know you

«i don’t know you, but you make me

wonder who you are»

Everybody on campus knew him. The one and only Kim Woosung. Majoring in music and arts, vocalist and guitarist in his own band The Rose and every girls' heartthrob.

[y/n] wouldn't admit it though. She hated the fact that she developed a crush on him so quickly. But who wouldn't? Just a look at him would help you understand why every girl on campus had a crush on him.

5'10'', nice built and a smile that could heal all the diseases in the world. Only thing [y/n] didn't like what his personality.

He was known for being a player. If he liked someone, she would be going home with him by the end of the day. He was also very cocky and flirty. Not that that behavior annoyed [y/n], she found it very attractive, but not coming from him.

Everybody talked about him, it's just as if the whole world turned around him. And he definitely acted that way to her.

She just hated him. And liked him at the same time. But she would rather fail all her classes than admit it.

– Are you fantasizing again? – her friend Sangyu asked –. About a certain someone, maybe?

– What the heck Yu, of course not. You know I don't need no man – her friend laughed –. I was just thinking about what I'll eat for lunch later.

– If that's what you say. Well, here's me. See you later at lunch! – they said their goodbyes while each of them went to their different classes.

[y/n] was studying linguistics. She loved languages and was very good at it too.

She entered the classroom and sat down. The room was still kind of empty since class didn't start for another 15 minutes, so she decided to kill time by playing with her phone.

– Hey, is this seat taken? – she turned around when she heard a voice. She directly smiled.

– Of course it is Hajoon, was saving it just for you – she winked, making him blush, to what she laughed.

Lee Hajoon. He was studying music and also linguistics. That's how they met. They just sat together at one of their first classes and hit it off.

There was one bad thing about him though. What, you may ask? He was friends with Woosung.

– Are you free tonight? – he asked.

"Of course I'm free", she thought. It was kind of sad though. To be a student who had nothing to do on a Friday night.

– Why are you asking?

– We are playing some songs tonight at The Red Cat and I would really appreciate it if you would come – she sighed.

She saw it coming. It wasn't the first time he asked her to come to one of their concerts. But she always had an excuse. She just couldn't go and have to look at Woosung the whole night. She would probably fall deeper for him if she did.

– And don't say you can't. I know you don't have anything to do.

– You're right, like always – they laughed –. Okay fine, I'll be there. But with one condition.

– I knew it. You just couldn't go to make me happy – he faked a tear.

– Shut up! I'm bringing Sangyu with me, and I want you to finally try and talk to her.

Hajoon had the hugest crush on Sangyu, and so did she. So [y/n] thought it would be a great idea to finally set them up.

Bad idea. During the first half, it was fun. They danced to their songs, and to [y/n]'s luck, Woosung's voice was that of an angel, making it difficult for her to stop looking at him.

They decided to take a break, and Hajoon luckily kept his promise and talked to Sangyu. Sadly [y/n] didn't really think it through, since she was now alone in the middle of the bar.

She sighed and decided to get herself something to drink.

– What can I get you miss?

– I would like a Sex On The Beach please – she answered politely.

– I could give you that for free.

She froze. They never talked but she would recognize that voice anywhere. Kim Woosung was flirting with her.

She was fangirling inside, but she wouldn't show it. That would only increase his ego and she wouldn't give him that.

– Not interested, sorry – she smiled at the bartender while paying for her drink.

– You sure?

– Oh hell yes I am – she stood up and walked towards a free seat in the back of the bar.

She sighed with relief when she didn't see him coming to her. She could breath normally again.

– It's me again – someone whispered in her ear.

– What the hell dude? – she said while getting away from his face –. What part about "I'm not interested" did you not understand?

– Come on, every girl wants a piece of this.

– Yeah well, not this one. So please, just leave me alone.

To her surprise, he smiled apologetically and left. She was expecting him to be more stubborn, so that was a nice surprise.

Great. Now she would spend the whole night thinking about that gesture, and wondering, was he really a player or was it just rumors?

Sangyu came back after a while and they enjoyed the rest of the night. But [y/n] kept thinking about Woosung. And so did he.

– Don't you think that's weird? – [y/n] turned around when she heard her friend Jinsoo. She was lost in her thoughts. And yes, they were about a specific someone.

– What is?

– Haven't you been listening? – Jinsoo made an annoyed gesture but started to explain again –. Woosung hasn't been seen with a girl since last week. And that's really weird coming from him.

[y/n] shrugged, implying she didn't care. But well, we all know she cared. In her mind there was every possible scenario about him.

– Maybe he fell in love? – suggested Sangyu, to what Jinsoo laughed –. I'm being serious. I've been hanging with Hajoon and the band these days and I can tell you Woosung is a really nice guy. All the stuff about him being a player is a lie. But believe what you want.

She stood up and left Jinsoo shocked and [y/n] surprised. [y/n] then said goodbye and ran to her bus who had just arrived.

Luckily there were some seats available, so she sat down since she had a long way to go. Her apartment was 20 minutes away from campus, but she enjoyed the bus rides.

She put her earphones and listened to her favorite song. But when she looked up, her eyes met with another ones. Woosung was sitting in front of her. She quickly looked away, so she couldn't see how he smiled sweetly at her.

Woosung had been infatuated with her since that night. He kept thinking about her. He liked her loose jeans and her casual hair, he liked how her eyes disappeared when she laughed heartily, he liked how kind she was to people.

He was dying to know her, but he supposed she wasn't interested after their conversation at the bar. And that made his heart ache a little bit.

[y/n] did her best in not looking at him for the first half of the ride, but it was hard. Really hard.

A couple of stops later, two elderly women came into the bus. Woosung and [y/n]'s reaction was to instantly stand up and offer them their seats.

It was a sweet gesture, and that made both of them fall even more in love with the other. And to top it off, they were now standing next to each other.

Finally, it was [y/n]'s stop. She was battling inside about if she should smile at him or not. His small gesture made her think maybe Sangyu was right, and he was indeed a nice guy.

The bus came to a stop. Woosung saw that it was her stop, which made him a little bit disappointed since he still had a couple of stops before him.

She sighed. And quickly looked at him, smiled and exited the bus, leaving a surprised Woosung behind.

Friday night and Sangyu dragged [y/n] along to a bar. The guys would be having a special performance there, and since Hajoon had asked Yu to be his girlfriend, she needed to go. And of course, that meant [y/n] had to go too.

– Just promise you won't leave me alone afterwards to make out with your boyfriend – Sangyu smirked.

– I won't, relax – they both laughed.

The boys entered the stage. Everything went quiet. They took their respective places and Woosung took the microphone.

– Hello everybody, we are The Rose! – a lot of girl screams could be heard from the back of the bar, which made [y/n] cringe a little –. First of all, thank you all for coming, it means a lot to us – his eyes were searching something in the crowd –. Hope you enjoy it!

They started playing their set and the mood changed. Their songs were so upbeat and fun, [y/n] couldn't help but move her head along to the music. Her eyes met Woosung's a couple times, making her blush.

After a couple of songs, it was time for the last one.

– Well, now it's time for our last song – some whining sounds were heard –. I know you want to hear more, but I guess that means you'll have to keep coming to our concerts – everybody laughed, including [y/n] –. Now this last song is a new one, what means we haven't played it before. Honestly, I just finished it yesterday – his eyes met [y/n]'s –. It's dedicated to a special girl out there, so let's hope she likes it.

It was the prettiest song [y/n] had heard in her entire life. And to make it even more beautiful, Woosung kept staring at her the whole time.

She listened to the whole song, which made her heart want to explode and her feelings want to come out. That's why she left the bar after they were done.

She just needed some fresh air to try and sort her feelings out. She couldn't be falling for him.

Woosung saw her ran out and without a thought, went straight after her. He found her staring at the starry sky just in front of the bar. He walked up to her.

They stood next to each other for a couple minutes, without saying anything. And they both liked the silence. It wasn't awkward. On the contrary, it felt nice.

– Are you okay? I saw you ran out and I wanted to make sure everything was fine – [y/n]'s heart jumped –. Was it the song? If it was, just know that I didn't mean to hurt you or anything like that. I just wanted to express my feelings. And it would be totally fine with me if you didn't feel the same.

– Why do you have to be so goddamn nice? – her question surprised him. But she wasn't done yet –. You're supposed to be a player! You're not supposed to act like this and make my heart flutter at every word you say! I'm trying to forget you, goddamn it. I can't fall in love with you, I just can't!

He took her hand in his and looked right into her eyes.

– Why can't you? – she looked away, but he took her chin in his other hand to make her look at him –. All that stuff about me being a player, is a lie. I haven't taken a girl home since last year. I don't play with their hearts, I'm just straight to them. It's been a while since I liked someone. But you just make it seem easy, and right. I know we don't really know each other, but I'd love to. So, let me travel you.

[frecklesdefelix]

Tequila

(revised) tutor!felix, badboy!changbin, rapper!chan, frat!straykids

Warning: swearing, sexual innuendos, drinking, drugs

Word count: too many, I didn't count

You trudge into your school library. You're not excited to be here but you're late for your tutoring lesson. You despised that your parents and teachers insisted you got tutoring for something as rudimentary as Russian history; just because you failed one exam by accidentally falling asleep while taking it didn't mean you needed help. You were fine, but no one else thought you were.

You rush into the secluded study room and are met face to face with Felix, the History nerd in school.

He was cute but not in the way that Hyunjin was. It was the type of cute where you would want to squish their cheeks and read them a bedtime story. While everyone else was into shaving, drinking and sex, Felix looked like his mom tucked him into his race car bed every night with a bedtime story that revolved around talking mice and sleeping princesses while he calmly wears his two piece pajamas under his childish spiderman sheets.

Felix was a glass of warm milk, soothing to the soul and familiar to the tongue. You were looking for something that made your throat burn, your skin itch and your heart race. You often described your personality as a lime; you were sour on your own. But together with tequila, you were an iconic balanced duo. You were searching for that tequila, that kiss in the dark. And Felix was not it.

"Sorry I'm late. Have you been waiting long?" You apologized half-heartedly.

"No, it's okay. I just got here too." He smiled softly as he put away his snacks. You sat down and tried to get everything over with quickly. You answered all the questions correctly and sometimes played dumb to indulge him. Before you knew it, it was time to go.

After the tutoring lesson reached it's time limit, you started rushing to put everything away quickly.

"Hey, so I, um, I know this is awkward but my friends, Chan and Jisung, they're having a party and they told me to invite my friends. The thing is, I don't have many other friends unfortunately. Would you be interested in going?" He asked shyly. You chuckled and stood silent when you saw he was being serious.

"A party? Han Jisung and Chris Bang Chan?" You coughed. They were some of the most exclusive parties of the school. You had never gotten the opportunity to go to one since you were never invited. Although you wished you were. Chan, Jisung and Changbin were notoriously popular in school for being troublemakers. Chan and Jisung were the only ones attending school at the moment because Changbin had gotten suspended. The cause was unknown, but the rumors were aplenty and ranged from highly illegal things to petty theft.

"Yeah. Would you be interested in going?"

"Well, I don't know any of the people there." You muttered.

"See, that's okay because I'd be going. And you know me, right?"

"I mean, Felix you're nice and all but you're just my tutor." You smile, apologetically.

"I know, I know. I'm sorry to try to put this on you." He smiles, but you can see the sadness in his eyes. You felt your heart start to hurt with guilt and pity for the poor boy. How he was friends with Han Jisung and Chris Bang Chan was definitely a question for conspiracy theorists everywhere. They were total opposite of Felix. They were the tequila you so desperately desired.

"Okay, I'll go with you." You agree.

"Like a date?" He gulped nervously.

"If that's what you want, sure. I'll keep you company." You shrug, grinning. He nodded and thanked you profusely before walking out. He rushed back in, scratching the back of his neck.

"I should probably let you know what time I'm picking you up, shouldn't I?"

"Yes, you probably should." You chuckle.

"Is 9 okay?" He inquired.

"9 is perfect." You state as he nods, writing stuff down on his agenda. Once a nerd, always a nerd.

The day of the party, you made sure to eat before you left, in case he asked you out to dinner. You didn't feel comfortable eating in front of strangers. You were pulling the last finishing touches on your tameless mane of hair before you heard the doorbell sound. You opened the door and were faced with who you soon realized was Felix. He didn't look like his usual self.

Felix was wearing a piercing, something that you knew you hadn't seen him wear or probably never noticed he owned. You weren't even aware he had the balls to pull a move like getting piercings. He had on a baseball cap that perfectly framed his now blond hair. He had dyed it since the last time I had seen him, from a very cute light scarlet red to a seductive blond that framed his masculine features perfectly. His cheekbones were high and his mouth was curled into a soft smile. His eyes were piercing into your own, the familiar and warm chocolate brown replaced by stormy grey that overflowed with electricity whenever he looked at you.

"Felix?" You asked, smiling.

"Y/N?" He teased.

"What happened to my Russian History Tutor? What did you do to him?" You chuckled.

"He goes into hibernation during the weekends. Ready?" He questioned. You nodded and closed the door behind you.

"I hope you don't mind walking to the party. It's right outside campus in the frat house Jisung and Chan are a part of." He explained, looking at my shoes. You had opted for high top converse this one time.

"Oh, yeah no it's fine. I'm all set for the night." You lifted you foot off the ground and shook it briefly. Felix chuckled and waited for you to catch up with his pace.

"Thanks again for agreeing to come to the party with me. I know we don't know each other too well, so I hope it isn't too awkward." He muttered nervously. You chuckled.

"What?" He asked, curious as to your amusement.

"For a second I saw a bit of my tutor Felix again. I thought he went into hibernation." You joked. He burst out laughing.

"Well, we are still the same person." He stated.

"How did you become friends with Jisung and Chan? I'm sorry, but I still can't believe you guys are friends." You apologized. Felix sighed before chuckling at your question.

"Yeah, I get that a lot. Honestly I don't even know how myself. It really started as a simple tutoring session. Then they asked me if I wanted to attend a party and they kept coming up to me after that. Now we're buds." He shrugged.

"I'm not going to lie, I was shocked the first time I saw all of you together. You just don't fit the mold of what I would assume people like that are like." You breathed out nervously.

Before he could answer, you heard a commotion farther ahead on the block you were walking through. You saw a house, lit up with Christmas lights that flickered and loud heavy music that sounded muffled but deafening.

"So that's it, huh?" You gulped, hiding your excitement. He nodded.

"Before we go inside, because you agreed to come with me, doesn't mean that you have to stay of you don't want to. Just tell me and we will head out."

"But what about you? What if you want to stay?"

"No it's not about me." He shook his head. You nodded slowly, accepting the fact that you were actually nervous too. The idea of partying with some of the school's most notorious players and troublemakers wasn't something you thought through very much. And now that you were here, faced with the reality of the situation, you were nervous.

Felix saw this and grabbed your hand. You instinctively pulled away and he apologized profusely.

"I saw you were nervous. I was going to give you a reassuring squeeze. You're not alone, you know? I'm sorry though. I should've asked." He coughed.

"Sorry, it was instinctive. I don't mean to be rude. Let's just go inside before I make a bigger fool of myself." You sighed, chuckling anxiously. Felix started walking towards the house.

Inside the house, you had discovered that these parties weren't all illegal substances, as you had previously presumed. Sure, there were definitely people who were into the hard stuff, but you could point them out in the crowd and apparently everyone else did too. They steered clear of them. Going through the rumors you had heard in your head, you discovered that apart from it being a mostly drug free zone, Chan and Jisung, along with Changbin, provided the music for the most part. They performed and rapped live. Felix stayed beside you for the most part and didn't try anything else with you.

"You want anything to drink?" He asked, shortly after Chan, Changbin, and Jisung had gotten off the stage.

"Sure. But I get to grab my drink." You joke.

Felix led you to the kitchen, where he ran into Chan.

"Felix! Mate, glad you came! What did you think? Oh fuck, you brought A GIRL?! You fucking rascal!" He exclaimed, putting Felix into a hug before pulling him into a headlock.

"Um, excuse me but I'm right here. I'm not a fucking piece of meat." You glared.

"Feisty! Apologies, I got overexcited. Here, help yourselves to anything you want to drink and then come, let's introduce you around to the crew." He smiled sweetly. You followed him outside, a cooler in hand, to Jisung and Changbin.

"You fuckers, you will not believe who I met in the kitchen! There's Felix here, and he brought a friend! Wait, fuck, I didn't ask your name. What's your name?" He exclaimed.

"Y/N. Nice to meet you guys." You smirked.

"Felix actually brought a friend, who knew?! Welcome Y/N, feel at home. I'm Jisung and that's Changbin." He shook your hand.

"Nice to meet you guys formally. I've heard a lot about all of you." You sip your drink.

"Yeah, everyone says that. Don't believe everything you hear though." Changbin scoffed, smiling.

"Only the good stuff is true." Jisung winked. You scoffed and looked at Felix.

"Where's Hyunjin and Jeongin? They're usually out at things like these." Felix coughed, changing the subject. As if by magic, Jeongin stormed up to Chan and Changbin.

"Your stupid loud music ISN'T letting me sleep! I tried to study but I can't and so I'm trying to sleep but you won't fucking let me!" He yelled at the boys. They burst out laughing and Jeongin grew into a disturbing shade of red.

"I'm trying to fucking sleep! Keep it down!" He yelled, turning to look at every single one of the guys and then his eyes landed on me. His gaze softened before asking me who I was.

"This is Y/N. And she came with Felix." Jisung answered, the smirk plastered on his face.

"Oh, word!" Jeongin smiled, excited and extending his hand out for Felix to high five.

"He invited me and I accepted. It seems you have the wrong idea. We aren't together." You stated, clearing your throat.

"Oh, we know that. We're just excited to see him out with a girl and away from the books." Changbin stated.

"Jeongin, where is Hyunjin? Haven't seen him all night." Chan asked, changing the topic, much to your amusement and appreciation.

"He's tearing up the dance floor." Jeongin sighed, grinning lightly before walking away. They took this as a sign to follow him and started to slither through the crowd. Felix was standing beside you, his ears red and his fingers on his neck.

"Are you okay?" You furrowed your brows.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm sorry about that. They're-" he started before you finished.

"Frat boys. I know."

Before long you were inside the house again, in what would've been the living room if there weren't so many people dancing. In the center, Hyunjin was dancing away and beside him, Minho.

He was another frat boy who majored in dance, along with Hyunjin. They weren't bad at all. Hyunjin looked in your general direction and stopped, hitting Minho's arm and he stopped as well. They approached the guys and they yelled at each other in an unintelligible volume. They all headed into the kitchen where Woojin, the house dad, was throwing empty cups into a huge trash can they were carrying around. Seungmin, the last of the frat boys was mixing drinks and pouring away as if this was a bar. He even had a tip jar set up for people after offering his services.

"Hi Y/N!" Seungmin greeted.

"You know each other?" Hyunjin asked.

"We have biology together." You smiled. He was always helping you with your labs and helping you finish your assignments on time.

"Nice to see you around. Glad you came. Any drink you want?" He asked.

"What does it look like I'm in the mood for?" You teased lightly. He smirked, looking at Felix.

"She's a tequila person." He answered.