#it just feels like theres a cavern between them

[arogoldpika123]

Not sure how to organize my thoughts, so just going to bullet point my main thoughts

-Feefee returning, and Ruby's speech on Beauty was great, 10/10 highlight

-Archie and Maxie returning was cool, as they became quite cruel and hatable, but like with the fight at Seafloor Cavern, I wish the fight had a bit more focus, as really Ruby and Sapphire do a single combo move, then the Leader's run away

-Courtney's back story was good, and made her inclusion interesting. Also, the girl in the flashbacks alongside her is definitely Daisy Oak, right?

-Sapphire was way out of focus, and she definitely should've gotten mad at Ruby at somepoint for the betrayal/ pushing her away. Tricky being clutch was also great -Found it funny how Ruby straight up just stole Troppy, it is actually on his team in the between Chapter status updates -Norman backstory was good. I think? I feel like theres some more to be said about Ruby and Sapphire's backstory, but it is overall solid

- And last but not least, Celebi. So Ruby just found Celebi? Because its not like there's a reference to Ilex Forest or anything, he just says he's had it, and it is from Johto. I like how he doesn't actually know it time travels, and he just sort of wishes that he could have saved the people who had fallen, and Celebi helps him because it cares. Ruby doesn't actively time travel, and it simply ends up as a slightly altered Future. Not as much of an asspull as I had thought when I heard of it, but not as well foreshadowed as other things. -Epilogue stuff! I Liked how Sapphire got tongue tied at the end, kinda wish we could see her Gym fight with Norman. And I like them walking home, actual friends with a shared wink. - Team Magma got a lot of focus overall, as both Courtney and Tabitha are shown to surrvive, but no one on Team Aqua gets a single panel. So Ruby is really the main focus overall. Speaking of, Tabitha at the hot springs is great, and I enjoy Flannery noticing him, thats cute. - Overall- I like Ruby and Sapphire, it handles the Legendary conflict quite well, the characters have good backstories and development, but sometimes it doesn't share focus well, and has lack luster battles(Examples being the Maxie and Archie fights, and Chic's double kick strategy against Brawly just feels like a weak win) But its great! It goes hard with backstories and legends, and is quite fun.

[birdybirdnerd]

hello i am here i have had A Day but i cant stop thinking about birds and ive been stewing on words for several days now. i love you

the delightful coincidence that she thought to have narrowed her search down to dover, but because beachy head is Right There and she needs to be thorough so she checks there first (and what do you know, Its There), is just SO delightful to me

i love the back and forth of her in the here and now and the her of the past, it creates a lovely reading-feel. cant think of the word but you know what i mean. feels nice to read, like swaying back and forth if that makes sense

god, your descriptions are so beautiful, the way you handle words to make them punch, just, mwah. chefs kiss. 'strange. she would always find herself crying at the idea. she didn't know for a long, long time, that six year olds shouldn't be thinking about that. strange' that shit is HAUNTING in such a good way

'she reeked of tourism and sweat' another fantastic line, so evocative of that specific flavor of physical exertion

hmm, wonder who the missed calls/voicemails are? i have an idea from later on in the story, but the fact that you never specifically say Who it is intrigues and delights me. love some mystery sprinkled in

OOOOH, love the shadows warping Wrongly, foreshadowing that theres Something Else going on

the descriptions of her depression and how it manifests are gut wrenchingly poignant, i can almost feel how heavy it all is. you handle it intimately well and i applaud you; its often hard to find words to describe just what a character/you are feeling and youve done more than well

AND YES. YES. staying alive out of spite, continuing to forge onwards because FUCK the people that try to drag you down, pushing on and fighting for every step. we love to see it- AND we love to see someone take their destiny in their own hands and leave when they know its time

'she had made her own miracle. she'd pulled herself from her own grave. somewhere along the way, she chose to love' when i say my heart swelled and i got chills, man…

the whole 'down. down. down.' paragraph similarly is written so so well, the rhythm of it, the cadence, really drawing you in and keeping you hooked like a heartbeat. chefs kiss

GOD i can FEEL her emotions when she gets there, when she turns out to look at the water, holy shit. and then?? when she thinks its just another dead end?? the sheer panic, the grief, the utter frustration she feels comes out in every word you wrote- and then the frantic way she scrambles for that little crevice, that sliver of a chance that no, she wasn't wrong, its right there-

the description of the cavern/antechamber when she enters is very nice, very evocative. its like im there and boy howdy do i feel unsettled

the image of a floor carpeted in gold feathers, leading up to the figure frozen in gold? thats some good shit right there. primo visuals. hell yes

i loooooove love love LOVE voices that come from nowhere and are in your head and dont have a voice of their own but yet you Understand them, god its such good shit i eat it up every time i see it and you knocked it out of the park with this one dude hell YES

her dedication, her determination, i love it. she tried so so so hard and she made it. im so proud of her. i love her

god, sorry. i love the dissonance between this grand prose, this scene where she is determined and approaching the sun disk and ready to accept her rightful rule, where it demands of her trials to complete to prove her worth, and then- she makes a nerd reference and its just like 'what'. fuckin superb

aaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH i love love LOVE the trials, the way you set them up with no clear way to win/choose correctly, and yet she figures it out anyway!!!! i love challenges that have no clear win scenario but which Do Actually that require the challenged to be selfless and clever and to most of all Not Give A Single Shit, its fuckin rad!!!

the whole part in the second trial where she Realizes…. god. more chills. so many chills. all the chills. i love it (sobs)

GOD AND. AND THEN. so many stories that have similar scenarios to the above and end with the challenged choosing themself so often end with the challenged about to die/suffer the consequences they chose, only for things to stop right beforehand, right at the last possible moment, and then theyre told they were right and they win. they dont actually suffer, but up until the last moment, they have to believe with their whole hearts that they will or it lessens the impact

you still made her suffer. she still got attacked, and hurt, and brutalized, and THAT was also part of the trial. she couldnt just accept the consequences in a distant way, a hypothetical way, or even in a way that like. she believed would happen only for it not to Actually happen and spare her the pain. because the level of power she will be getting from this, she NEEDS to understand the consequences, intimately. she needs to suffer, to know truly what she is accepting, what shes doing. and the way it segues so neatly into the final trial, a continuation of that, i just. i dont even have words. youre fuckin rad

so visceral, so detailed, so painful to read because your mastery of description makes us feel like we're there, like we're her, like we're the ones being torn apart to our very atoms. i am envious, its so so SO good.

the sun disk pushing her again and again to let go, to give up, this isnt for you, this is the kind of punishment you will have to suffer day after day if you choose this and youre not ready- except by pushing through and forcing herself to her knees and then her feet and then crawling towards the obelisk even while she is torn apart, she proves that she is ready and dammit she is going to do things her way

if i could just copy and paste the entire section of her remembering her shitty childhood and fighting back and almost giving up and staying alive and choosing life, i would because its all so so good and i love it, but then id just be. pasting a whole section like four hundred words long and this comment is supposed to be MY words dammit anyways i lov eyour words. i love them. i love them

THE NAME REVEAL. i knew going into this her name wasnt mirah but i didnt question it, i figured itd be important later and GOD I WASNT DISAPPOINTED. I LOVE IT and GOD i love the way you wrote the sun disk Knowing and her Realizing and UGH I WANT TO EAT YOUR WRITING MAY GOOD FUCKING GOD ITS SO GOOD

i am jsut. in awe. i dont even know where to start with the section on her actually Becoming. the agony, the descriptions, the way she comes to at the end and shes just so. calm. because its done now. she has Become

and there she goes!

jesus

BIG GOD

Queenie went through a lot of work to get to where she is today. Putting it onto paper was a hard thing to do, for reasons that will become painfully obvious.

Please understand that I’ve had this concept planned out for at least 3 years now—if it reads like an angst ride, it’s because it’s something 2015 May had conceptualized, and I’ve set into stone for years and years. If anything, writing this nailed down some facts about her character and her beliefs that I haven’t gotten to really talk about or study in depth.

10.8k. 30 pages, single spaced. Not an enjoyable ride to read. Heavy, heavy lore—there’s no humor in this one.

Warnings for mention of suicide/suicide idealization, graphic descriptions of violence and body trauma. Also just general angst. Probably some CPTSD.

BIG GOD

The white cliff side stretched along the horizon, a stark contrast to the blue sky that it cut into, to the black sea that crashed against it. From here, she could see the thin red and white lighthouse, could only just make out the coast that crested partway along the bottom.

Beachy Head was the second of the four chalk cliff ranges she’d narrowed the location to. Mirah had seen the Seven Sisters—had scoped the cliffs for over a week, studying every shadow and dip—to no avail. The scripts had been unclear, only truly describing the cliff-side cave entrance as well hidden, barely a blot against the white edges of Albion, soaked in a history of blood.

In all honesty, she predicted the artifact would be at Dover, near the castle. It was a logical conclusion to jump to—the site had been witness to war, over and over again. The right island, the right backstory, it made sense that the scripts would describe Dover.

But Beachy Head was just east of the Sisters, and she wanted to be thorough. She’d come this far.

Keep reading

[zaricats]

I'm interested, what do you think of Roman and Kendall's relationship overall? I feel like they were close when they were little but got driven apart when Roman's psychological issues got him sent to military school and Logan covertly encouraged him to blame Kendall for making him turn out weird (mainly to take any responsibility off of himself). I don't believe Kendall was aware of anyone other than Logan hurting Roman or that Kendall abused Roman himself, but... it's complicated.

!! i don't think roman and kendall were ever very close, actually - i think they've always been pretty distant

this got away from me in the extreme so im going to put this under a cut (i'm so sorry)

the dog cage story in the episode with tom's bachelor party i think is indicative of two things: how siblinghood in the roy house functioned, and how kendall (as well as connor) react to guilt/abuse.

connor says, when roman asks him if he really did enjoy being put in a dog kennel, that they all had a hierarchy to learn and that once they learned it, they would be happier. we're meant to take this as a sort of metaphor: in childhood, the siblings were likely pitted against each other (by logan) to be the 'stronger dog'. roman was the 'weaker dog' because he was the one stuck in the cage - kendall was stronger because he put him in there. kendall rationalizes it by the idea that roman somehow belongs in this position, wants to be there and is happier for it, so that kendall can feel better about participating and winning.

i don't necessarily blame kendall for participating (he was also a child), but that sort of competition and play would likely prevent any sort of close relationship. roman was four - that would be an extremely early memory for him. logan likely intended to prevent any close bonds anyway, because in order to have control over someone, you have to be the most important person in their life. a close relationship with a sibling could ruin that; it could be a threat to you, even.

the dog cage story is also extremely tied up with roman's "sexual perversity", and is also, imo, extremely indicative of csa (bed-wetting, 'you enjoyed it', etc). kendall doesn't really remember the story at all, at first, and his next reaction is to get defensive. he insists it wasn't that bad, and that roman wanted it. i agree with the idea that kendall wouldn't have known if someone other than logan was hurting roman, but that sort of denial and avoidance still wouldn't (and doesn't) play very well with roman. it hurts when your suffering goes unnoticed and/or unprevented.

even if roman isn't a victim of csa (i don't think anything fits better, but i digress), it's very possible kendall exhibited this sort of avoidance/denial in regards to just logan's physical abuse. i know he defends roman at argestes, but that doesn't necessarily indicate anything about their childhood (for example, logan's already snapped at iverson at this point - this would have changed kendall in a fundamental way).

i do think roman was close with shiv as children - they seem closer in age, and they have a rapport/banter/cadence with each other that neither have with kendall. this could be because kendall just isn't good at that sort of banter, but i think we're meant to read a special sort of closeness out of it. it's a mean sort of affection only roman and shiv have.

shiv also isn't competition in the way kendall is. her distance from waystar in the beginning of the show is non-threatening, and i think her position as a woman also prevents her from intimidating roman in any sort of significant way (this goes for kendall as well). even still, once shiv exposes logan's offer to make her CEO, roman's relationship with her becomes a lot more aggressive. their teasing becomes acidic and cruel - the way they poke at each other about sex (shiv having too much, roman having none at all) grows exponentially in both amount and cruelty. i think this is where roman and kendall have been their whole lives.

i think theres a lot to be seen in the way roman wrestles with both shiv and kendall as well. with shiv, roman wrestles just to wrestle - its very reminiscent of two kids getting into a scuffle because its fun and they need to get the energy out somehow. when they wrestle in the hospital, its almost cathartic; its a strange way to process logan's sudden and eminent mortality.

with kendall, wrestling is a competition - its a genuine fight. think of the hunting retreat: kendall is trying to take something away from roman, kendall is trying to get roman in trouble, kendall is trying to put roman down so he can get a leg up with logan. again, their relationship is about competition.

i do think something changes after roman gets back from turkey - he starts showing real concern for Kendall, makes attempts to get closer with him (and shiv) by suggesting they talk seriously, etc. i think this is a new thing, however - i don't think they're going back to something they once had. it feels new and awkward - i think they've always been dogs at each other's throats.

[huesohnobro]

You Dont Love Her

Chapter 11: Fire

Content warnings: Actually in comparison this one is pretty tame, theres some anxiety and stuff, Wanda being crazy

“You know when you said we’d be stealing an aircraft, I didn't think you were serious.”

Natasha rolled her eyes, glaring playfully at you over a set of dark sunglasses. They hid her eyes and all of the emotion that they held, whether that be a frenzied sort of adrenaline or something softer, you wouldn’t know. 

“We aren’t stealing anything, I’m cashing in a favor with someone who happens to owe me.” 

Her hand gripped the steering wheel tightly, as if trying to indent her handprint into the smooth, soft leather; quite the mark to leave on your vehicle if she did. 

You scoffed and crossed your arms, closing your eyes to give them a break from the endless expanse of green and brown that rushed by the windows. 

“If all we needed was a favor then I could’ve just asked one of my contacts.”

“What like waiting for you to ki-“ You shot the spy a warning look before she could finish the word, instead electing to clear her throat before continuing on. “Like waiting for you to conduct your business would’ve been faster than just packing up and going to a meeting point?” 

She had a point, not that you’d admit it. Farai took at least 4 hours to get back to you, and everyone else in your contact list was rather…. Hesitant.. to work with you after the incident at the gala. 

Such was the cost of being a god, a meager price to pay in the grand scheme of things. Soon you wouldn’t have to bear the burdens of such costs, soon you would be able to take joy in things other than blood in mayhem, soon you would have your missing piece before you filled with blood and life and vigor. 

Soon Nekali would be in your arms and you would once again know the joys of being mortal, and you would be unbothered by whatever pains and sorrows came with your mortality.

You wouldn’t need power or respect or sacrifices after tonight, all you would need is the woman who sat at your side and the woman who rested against the skin of your chest.

You took the crystal that hung from your neck between your fingers, gently holding it as a pleasant warmth grew within your sternum at the idea of a more peaceful existence with the two. Despite the desire within to allow yourself to rest with this warmth, to curl up and lie with it until the feeling becomes ingrained in your bones, reality required you to bury the feeling deep within yourself. You were thinking far too pleasantly about your near future, even with the developments between yourself and Natasha you were sure that some part of her wanted to see you behind bars. 

You could worry about that later, you were sure that it wouldn’t be too hard to break yourself out of wherever they put you anyhow; for now you’d focus on the winding road ahead of you, the bright star in the morning sky, and how Natasha was practically trying to crush your gear shift in her grip. Placing your hand on top of hers, you rested your fingers over the gaps between her own, your thumb gently rubbing the side of her palm.

“If you don’t relax you’re going to fuck up my interior Araña, and I doubt you can afford to replace it.”

Her bewildered smirk made your heart flutter, the warmth from just a few minutes ago begging, screaming to work its way back into the cavern of your chest. The widow looked like fire made flesh in that moment, hair enkindled into a veritable blaze in the morning sun, skin thrumming with an ill tempered frenzy of nerves and adrenaline. Today, fire was neither dangerous, nor the doom of your lover,but rather something you desired to have pressed against you in the late hours of the night.

Today fire was not hell, today fire was hope and safety.

Fire was going to be the reason your favorite pair of shoes was fucking ruined. A two mile long tread through high grass, snagging branches, and patches of earthen clay and mud had you cringing out of regret with each step. Natasha was, of course, unbothered, she had practically existed in a pair of black combat boots with the cuffs of her pants tucked into them. Never again, never again would you let her plan retrievals or reconnaissance preparation or anything that in any sort of manner requires picking something up for a mission. It didn’t matter if those things would never happen again between the two of you, it didn’t matter that the woods offered beloved privacy and a sense of shelter through the close together trees and hanging moss. None of that mattered if this was something that she considered a casual affair: you would be damned to the infernal plane you habitually wander through if you made it into a casual affair for yourself.

You practically sighed in relief when the thick bunches and clusters of branches gave way to an open and spacious clearing, the next section of woods a far and distant sight compared to the bark and lichen that grew behind you. The teeming life of the woods that made itself known through chirping voices and the rustling of leaves was absent from the clearing, only grass and a metal behemoth lying within. The titanium and steel of the small military plane looked uncanny, a symbol of human bloodshed in a forest that deserves no such afflictions. 

Natasha walked through the field with a practiced ease, seeking out the man you could only assume was the aforementioned contact. Hanging back from the conversation, you stared up at the craft that would soon be porting both you and the spy to your previously abandoned home: the only reason you weren’t teleporting there was well… you couldn’t risk harming Natasha like that. The very idea of bringing her along… the liquifying meat, the smell of charring bone… it was all too much, a suffocating concoction of smells and textures against your hands, the wet press of blood against clothing that would inevitably stain beyond repair during a final embrace, the gentle smile even as unbearable pain wracks through the system….

Not now, don’t think about that now. The muscles of your shoulders tensed up, the prehensile cord of your tail wrapping around your hips in an effort to stabilize your shaking. 

Something else. Think about something else, anything else, the negotiation happening behind you, the way the grass brushed against your legs, the way that the clouds hung in the sky, anything at all please anything and everything at all would be better than this.

The dark glimmer of metal wings caught your eyes, a smooth expanse of welded together metal that held unknown mysteries inside.

When was the last time you had been on a plane, come to think of it… have you ever been on a plane?

To say that Natasha was stressed would be like saying it was snowing as a blizzard raged outside of your house, technically it was an accurate statement, however it failed to capture the magnitude of the event taking place. First there was hacking into the S.H.I.E.L.D. mainframe in order to act as surveillance and direct Helen where to go with the Cradle, which was fairly simple; next was coaching the geneticist on lifting off and setting the autopilot embedded in the stealth-craft to the pre disclosed coordinates; and then there was tampering with S.H.I.E.L.D.’s security camera footage to ensure that it looked as though the good doctor was still in her laboratory. It wouldn’t have been anything particularly difficult had Natasha held access to quite literally anything other than a laptop that was bought the night before, and had S.H.I.E.L.D. not conscripted Stark to upgrade their cybersecurity and firewall systems in lieu of recent events. 

Eventually the proverbial blizzard had calmed down to all but a flurry, two hours in the air filled with technological espionage having passed, leaving Natasha to enjoy the view of the sky painted in the windshield before her. It was quiet, the wings of the jet cutting through the sky in the same way that a too-hot knife cuts through butter. If Natasha didn’t know any better she would think that she was the only soul on the aircraft, the journey being nothing special or out of the ordinary compared to her usual trips.

Its a shame that Natasha did know better. 

You weren’t necessarily the loudest person in the world, however your excessive time alone had given you certain… quirks. 

You had a tendency to mutter to yourself, likely as a way to communicate with the woman who rested in limbo, the absence of such muttering was a bit jarring to say the least. 

No, instead of a light conversational murmuring, Natasha’s ears picked up on jagged breaths and the incessant tapping of a sole against the metal floor. 

Natasha slowly entered the hold, consciously unmasking her usually silent steps in order to alert you to her presence in an attempt to not escalate your panic. She wasn’t quite sure what was wrong, but she did know one general rule: dangerous people become even more so when erratic, especially when in small spaces. Your tail was wrapped around your waist, eye twitching as you gripped the crystal around your neck harder and harder with every bump of turbulence. It was a strange sight to behold, Natasha had never seen you show fear; to watch it be so clearly etched into your features was shocking. Hell, you had been so distracted by your panic that you had failed to notice the spy’s continued presence in the room until about 20 seconds after her entry. 

Your posture straightened in an attempt at forced relaxation, your leg stilling itself and your hands planting themselves onto your thighs as your eyes met green ones. 

Your tail betrayed you as the hull shook ever so slightly, tightening noticeably around your waist as though it were a living belt. Your teeth were clenched tightly, hands balled into fists, wary as Natasha took a seat next to you. 

“Do you want a drink or something to relax?”

Your eyes flicked over to Natasha before focusing back on your shoes, the building pressure in your ears slowly becoming unbearable. 

“I don’t really do alcohol anymore, so no thank you.”

“Good, we don’t have any in here,” the spy rested her back against the metal wall of the plane, feeling the slight rumble of the craft as she watched you. Nothing on your body was touching the plane if it didn’t have to, your hands on your lap, tail ever so slowly constricting yourself, your spine a figurative mile away from the wall. Natasha was almost positive that had you known a way to sit on the air rather than the bench you two rested on, you would’ve done so in a heartbeat.

“You’re going to break a rib- I take it you’re not a fan of flying?”

Your shoulders shrugged stiffly, the blue cord loosening just barely in response to her worry. 

“So far, no, I’m not seeing what’s so great about it.”

“So far?”

“Before today I’ve never exactly flown before, I’ve never really needed to. I can’t particularly say I understand the appeal.”

Natasha chuckled at that, a soft smile growing despite herself. 

“Well, most people who fly don’t have the power to teleport across continents.”

You hummed softly, looking back at the widow with eyes full of tempered anxiety. 

“Most people are delusional then, it’s ludicrous to trust a glorified tin can as much as we are right now.”

Natasha had to agree, most people were delusional, just not in the ways you were thinking. 

Walking into your old compound felt as though you were an archeologist walking into an ancient ruin. Cracked marble and tile, burn and splintered yet still polished wood, fallen soldiers and apostates, all littering the floor along side relics of past glories and triumphs. A veritable Pompeii of your endeavors, all sprinkled with a healthy coating of blood and gunpowder. As you toed through the rubble of your past, you couldn’t help but wonder if a volcanic ending to your efforts would’ve been preferable. It would’ve been easier, no doubt, you wouldn’t have to see the rings on hands, the worn pairs of boots, the peek of blue mottled skin from the corner of your eye. 

It was a harsh reality, what your old home was giving you. You were not the savior you proposed yourself to be, were you? Your blood and flesh was never going to be a permanent salvation, despite your best efforts. It was all doomed from the start, mortal souls can only take so much, perhaps they were not meant to be holy in the way one such as yourself was. 

Perhaps all of your endeavors would be doomed in the same way, ending with a faint scent of gunpowder and egregious burns. 

“We’ve passed at least three rooms with enough space to hold the Cradle, where are you taking us?” 

You looked back at Natasha with a raised eyebrow, gently thumbing at the crystal vessel chained around your neck. She didn’t seriously think that somewhere as filthy as the dormitories or common areas was good enough did she? No, in your mind there was only one place fit enough for your first love to take her beginning breaths and steps in, you were sure of it. 

“Those rooms are subpar in nature, only members of the flock resided in such squalor. We’re headed towards somewhere far more important, as it is what someone who holds such high importance in my heart deserves,” the two of you stopped before a solid hardwood door, tall and dark and covered with intricate silver filigree; the handle was cold in your grip, lacking its usual pristine shine. “I would demand the same quality if it was you, perhaps just a touch lower, you have tried to kill me a couple of times after all.” 

Your tone was teasing as you pushed the door open, a creaking echo shooting through the room. A high vaulted ceiling rested above you, engraved with intricate geometric designs and lettering; the walls were made of the same dark, filigreed material as the door, illuminated only by the sconces interspersed between pillars around the room; the floors were a rich marble, the shimmering onyx cracked with streaks of radiant white. It was vaguely haunting, a chill running down Natasha’s spine as the two of you entered; she didn’t understand why until she finally turned her eyes to the center of the room. 

A circular table dominated the space, covered in ornate mosaics of what Natasha could only assume were crystal and colorful stones, shackles on four opposing ends, grooves on its surface still stained with gray and ruddy brown, all leading towards collection chambers embedded into the floor. Various tools and sharp implements hung from the side of the diabolic structure, glinting gun metal gray and pure silver in the warm light of the room.

It was vile, how calm you were about the idea of such a place being the only location worthy of your lovers.

It was a place of death, of despair, of horror and maniacal power trips and of manipulation; a chamber of false gods and the enamoration of those who followed them. Shadows came to life and revealed the dark creatures that lay within them in this room, boogeymen and demons drank from bowls of blood and the aroma of awe-struck terror within these walls, and yet you looked so satisfied with it.

It was a living mockery of a cathedral.

It was twisted, horrific even.

It was the essence of what you had become after all this time.

It was gorgeous.

“Dr Cho is going to hate this- how is it that it wasn’t destroyed in the raid?”

You shrugged, sitting upon the altar and running your fingers over its grooves.

“People tend not to destroy holy sites, they usually know better.”

Wanda had never truly noticed how quiet Avengers tower could get when everyone was away, there was no bickering to be heard in the living room, no thudding of fists against a sand filled leather bag, there was nothing but the sound of a laugh track to distract her from just how lonely she felt. The laughter and dialogue emanating from the screen felt dull, Wanda’s mind too preoccupied with worry to be sated by the serialized comfort of Bewitched. There was something missing, the absence of a warm caress of a hand against her cheek, the lack of the scent of vanilla and spices surrounding and overtaking her senses in the best way. 

With the absence of such comforts came plenty of time to become lost in one’s own thoughts, ample opportunity to wander down the halls and corridors of anxiety and find oneself trapped in the shadows and whispers that echoed throughout. Such time and opportunity has been known to bring many a sane person towards conducting rather strange behaviors. 

This is how Wanda found herself in Natasha’s office, at approximately 2:52 pm on a Sunday. All things considered, there was no real reason for the witch to enter the room, and certainly no reason to find herself seated in Natasha’s usual chair. The lack of lumbar support was something she would have to bring up with the spy at a later time, for now Wanda would just allow herself to sink into the well worn fabric of the desk chair. 

Slowly but surely the minutes crawled by, the slow passage of time marked by the ticking of the clock on Natasha’s wall. The sound was like a metronome, steadfast and unwavering in its almost mechanical beat; Wanda couldn’t help but wonder if that ever bothered Natasha, if the steady click that filled the air ever reminded her of her days in the Red Room, surrounded by the sounds of training in both combat and dance. 

She wondered if Natasha had ever felt like this… lonely, surrounded by things that reminded her of someone she cared for dearly, waiting for something, anything to change and give her a sign that something new or exciting was going to happen, or perhaps that her beloved was safe and sound.

Breathe in, tick.

Breathe out, tick.

Breathe in, look at the pictures and various files on the desk.

Breathe out, notice how happy she looks in that picture with Clint’s family… how at home she looks with Laura and the kids…

Breathe in- 

The desktop computer flickered to life, the left corner of the screen showing grainy, pixelated footage of two figures in a hall. Scooting forward, Wanda squinted at the lettering in the corner to figure out where the footage was coming from. 

N-P-828… It was no use, so Wanda elected to watch the footage. The hall looked familiar, rubble covering the carpet alongside blood, it was haunting, filled with an odd sense of deja-vu that Wanda couldn’t place. 

Something was walking into the frame, something grey- no… blue. Blue in the shape of a person, clothed in a suit and followed by flaming red hair.

Wanda sat frozen as she watched the two walk across the screen, seemingly locked in conversation as they made their way across the hall. 

In that moment Wanda knew what she had to do, the ticking of the clock matched her heart rate as she watched the screen, standing from the chair with red wisps surrounding her fingers.

She was going to save Natasha, and it would be the last thing you’d ever see.

[adrianasunderworld]

I never have had anything against Kataang, honestly I've always been kind of indifferent to it. Even as a kid when the show first aired and the moment Aang blushed at Katara, I knew they were going to be a thing. Because the main guy and the main girl always end up together, it was just a given that I knew even then. So i never invested myself in their romance, there was never a moment that made me think, you know what this isnt bad, they're good together and I want them together. It never did anything for me so I put my attention in all the cool fights and backstory. It wasnt until I was a bit older and the show was wrapping up and me, new to the internet and internet fandom, did I see Zutara fan art and think "wait you can do that!?"

I haven't watched avatar in its entirety since it aired, and now that I've watched it on netflix as an adult and knowing what I do and do not enjoy in romance, and on occasion having to come up with quick explanations of the show for my mom who has watched bits and pieces with me, I really am bummed Zutara was not canon.

We all know the reasons we love this ship: the sun and moon, red vs blue, fire and water dynamic. They both mirror each other in diffrent ways. Plus they just look damn good together.

(Dont fight me on that last one, you cant convince me they dont make a good looking pair.)

Both are children of their nations leaders. Both took on personas to reach some kind of goal (katara as the painted lady and zuko the blue spirit), both were very close to their mothers and were the last to see them before they were gone, something that had traumatized them both. This last one was something they bonded over in ba sing se and later in the southern raiders, even though Zuko didnt talk about his mom in that episode, you know hes the only one in the group who understands that need for closure about her mom.

We assigned them both as the mom and dad friends of the group, and to an extent that is true. But both of them also have their own temper. We all know about Zukos anger issues and how he has dealt with it, I feel like we dont talk about Katara always down to kick ass, especially when shes pissed. ( master pakku anyone?)

Hell even in the show itself its almost a running gag. June teases Zuko that Katara is his girlfriend whenever she can. And they joke about it big time in ember island players. Even when not played for laughs theres something foreshadowy about Zuko finding and holding up to Kataras neck what we find out is essentially an engagement ring. Or Katara almost using the spirit water to heal his scar once Zuko opens up just a smidge about how he lost his mother too. Surrounded, I might add, in cave of glowing stones like the stones in the cave of lovers, which was created by lovers on opposing sides of a war.

Once Zuko joins the group, Katara is the only one that actively challenges him and tells him she will personally hold him accountable if he steps out of line. And Zuko owns up to what he has done in the past and willing to do anything to earn her forgiveness and trust.

Plus, Iroh teaches Zuko these advanced firebending moves he learned from observing water benders, methods zuko continues to use and later teach Aang. Water is hailed as the element of life and healing while fire is cast as death and destruction. Only when they learn from the dragons do we learn that fire gives life as well.

Plus, and this is something I've recently thought of while rewatching, I think they could have showed another important lesson that I think little me, who was so used to and uninvested in romances between the two main guy and girl, would have appreciated and been blown away by. Someone can love you, be willing to do anything for you, and you can care about them as well, but it doesn't mean you have to love them back. You can grow and change and find someone else, and it may hurt that other person, as much as you dont want it to, but you dont have to be with them. We all know about Aang and his attachment to Katara and not wanting to lose her. But Zuko also has Mai. Who has liked Zuko since they were kids and loved him more than she feared Azula, and was willing to save him even after he dumped her and knowing how pissed Azula would be. I love both Aang and Mai, and when I started to ship Zutara many moons ago, I felt bad because I liked them so much. They loved and were devoted to them, but I couldn't think of a scenario where neither character got out of it un hurt. But that's the thing, that's practically impossible. And you know what? It's ok, yes they would be heartbroken, but they'll eventually grow and move on. Something I think Aang especially needs. Because he may be wise beyond his years and also deserves good things for everything he's been through, but Aang is still very young and has room to grow. Katara and Zuko may not be much older than him, but they both were forced to grow and be mature years before they should have. And fighting in the same war that forced them to grow up would make them change and find each other. Aang and Katara always felt like puppy love to me. Its innocent and sweet, but never felt lasting to me. Zutara always felt sturdier, like they were capable of working well together because they have both figured out who they are and what they want.

We are reminded over and over again that Katara is the one thing that attached Aang to the world. But he must learn to let her go. In Ba sing Se when they were in the caverns, instead of immediately going to her defense. Aang let her go to go into the Avatar state. That's all well and good, but I feel like it could have been taken a step further in "if you love her, let her go" way. That would have been a great big step into Aang growing up and willing to give up his pursuit of Katara. A big sign that he has matured, and willing to let the girl he loves be happy, even if it's not with him.

[lettheladylead]

(I think I might be falling in love with you.) #Scroldie

(my usual warning for the concept of sex but theres nothing nsfw lol)

Scrooge grabbed the next ledge, ignoring Goldie’s sarcastic pleas for him to hurry up. He knew he was close - closer than anyone had ever been before - and he was going to savor the moment.

He pulled himself up to the top of the stalagmite and briefly turned away as the shining glow of the gemstone in front of him pierced his eyes. After a moment of composure, he turned back and took in the treasure in all its glory.

Without hesitation, Scrooge reached forward and pulled the tiny stone off its perch, too enchanted by the beauty to consider any consequences. Fortunately for him and his partner, nothing seemed to change, and Scrooge squeezed the gem in his palm as he looked down at the blonde below.

Goldie waved up at him. “Did you get it?”

He nodded and shook his hand that was holding the stone. “Did I set off any traps?”

She looked around herself to check for monsters or living statues or demons or anything of the sort. Nothing in sight, Goldie just shrugged. “Doesn’t look like it. Probably means the mysterious legends aren’t true, then,” she said with a sarcastic drawl.

Scrooge shrugged, undeterred by her pessimism. He was hoping beyond hope that the legends were true, since they weren’t mysterious to him. He’d come across detailed information about what exactly the diamond would bestow upon its holder and conveniently failed to mention it to Goldie. Just in case it was true.

He slid down the stalagmite and came to a graceful stop not too far from the woman on his mind. He looked at her seriously and then down at the gem in his hand.

Goldie crossed her arms over her chest. “So are there supposed to be any other treasures in this cave or am I just gonna nab that from you later?”

“The Agartha Diamond lives alone,” Scrooge quoted, taking another step closer to her. “That’s what the inscription said, at least.”

She rolled her eyes. “This was a lot of work for one little diamond. Are you gonna pay me for all my help, Moneybags?”

Scrooge smiled and rolled his eyes, too, but then moved his focus back to the gem. He moved it around in his palm and stared right at his partner.

“Why is he looking at me like that?”

Scrooge’s smile grew wider as the sound of Goldie’s voice hit his ears despite the fact that she hadn’t opened her mouth. He grabbed his water bottle to take a drink and avoid answering the question she’d actually said.

“Maybe he’s getting in the mood. I’d be down for some cave sex.”

He spit out his entire sip, getting his bag wet and making Goldie yelp and shove away from him.

“What? What’s wrong?!” she said quickly, looking at her own bottle.

Scrooge shook his head and punched his chest lightly. “N-nothin’, nothin’! Just, um...down the wrong pipe!”

She glared and glanced at his bottle, looking like she didn’t believe him. “Don’t waste your water, I’m not giving you any of mine!”

“I can’t believe how much that scared me.”

Scrooge glanced at her as she turned around to pack up her tools they’d used since getting to that part of the cave. He knew the gem would let him hear the thoughts of the person closest to him while he held it in his palm. He didn’t know what exactly to do with that power. Being able to read Goldie O’Gilt’s mind was a treasure of its own - a priceless gift that could help him avoid betrayal or perhaps even...understand her a little better.

His father always told him that women were impossible to understand, but Goldie was different. She was purposefully difficult in ways that other people weren’t. Sometimes he could barely make sense of her ulterior motives, he just knew there always was one.

She sighed and turned towards him again. “Why are you staring at me?”

He blinked as her thoughts lined up with her words for once. “...I want to ask you somethin’.”

“Then ask me already.”

Scrooge took a deep breath as he considered his choice of words. “Would you want to come with me on my next adventure?”

“Yes, yes. Yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.”

“Will there be more treasure for me to take?” she answered with a frown. “Otherwise I wouldn’t get your hopes up.”

Scrooge felt his heart race at the way she reacted in her head. Her excitement was contagious and he felt an urge to kiss her.

“Mmm…” Scrooge hummed. “There should be. More than this one, at least. But if you’re not interested, I’m sure I can find someone else to help me.”

“Oh absolutely not.”

“Don’t go jumping to conclusions, Scroogey. But before I agree to our next trip, how about we make it out of this one?” Goldie said as she strapped her backpack back over her shoulders. “Now let me see the diamond! I didn’t even get a glance.”

Scrooge squeezed the gem tighter into his palm. “How do I know you won’t just grab it and run off, hm? Safer to keep it out of your sight.”

“As if that could stop me,” Goldie responded with a smirk.

“God he is irritating. I wish he’d just shut up and kiss me already.”

He paused and considered that for a moment. Goldie was staring at him with a raised eyebrow and a hand on her hip and he glanced from his closed fist to her face and back again.

Well...he couldn’t just ignore a request like that, could he?

A moment later, Scrooge closed the gap between them and gently grabbed the side of her face with his free hand, pulling her break to his. She seemed genuinely surprised by the act but quickly kissed him back, moved her hands to his shoulders to squeeze the fabric of his jacket and pull him closer.

“Finally something goes my way,” he heard Goldie think as she deepened the kiss. His heart was racing even faster as he realized the intense intimacy of hearing someone’s thoughts while being physical with them.

“If he keeps this up, I’ll follow him anywhere.”

That time, Scrooge deepened the kiss, shoving her against the nearest cavern wall. She groaned and wrapped her arms around his neck.

“God, I love him, I love him, I-”

Unable to stop himself, Scrooge moved his previously closed hand to her waist, not noticing that the gem had slipped away from him. Her thoughts were cut off and the small sound of the stone hitting the floor made both adventurers pause.

Goldie was breathing heavily and Scrooge leaned down to briefly peck her beak with his a few times. She smiled as he did and opened her eyes to reveal a lusty expression.

Scrooge didn’t need the gem to figure that one out. But before he did, he wanted to clear some air. He moved away from her to grab the diamond off the ground and stood back up, holding it out so she could see it.

Goldie glanced down and shrugged. “It’s not much to look at.”

He shook his head. “You should try holdin’ it.”

With a confused expression, Goldie reached over and grabbed it, surprised by his change of heart. A little make-out session and suddenly he was trusting her? That wasn’t how they usually danced.

“I’m fallin’ in love with you.”

Goldie blushed deeply and stared at Scrooge’s beak, knowing for a fact that he didn’t say that out loud, but she distinctly heard it in his voice. She looked down at the diamond and then back up at him.

“I know you heard that. I wanted you to.”

She blinked. “I...is it…” She held up the diamond. “...mind-reading?”

Scrooge nodded, reaching out to take the gem back from her.

Goldie was faster, though, and held it against her heart. “So you were...listening to my thoughts. For the past ten minutes?”

“Give or take,” he said softly, grabbing her free hand. “You didnae think anythin’ you wouldnae have said out loud, lass.”

“Except that you love me.”

Her cheeks were bright red and she felt an unfamiliar anxiety prickling all around her. She couldn’t look Scrooge in the eyes as she tried to go over her thoughts for the last few minutes. How sappy and pathetic could she have possibly been in such a short amount of time?

“Y-you know...that’s a terrible invasion of privacy!” Goldie stammered, trying to sound angry but mostly sounding embarrassed. Which made her even more embarrassed.

“Says the walking invasion of privacy.”

“Feel free to listen to my thoughts, then,” Scrooge offered genuinely. “Unlike you, Goldie Girl, I’ve got nothin’ to hide.”

She scoffed and finally made eye contact to glare at him properly. “You call it hiding, I call it none of your business.”

“Loving me is none of my business?”

She blushed harder at his thoughts and angrily tossed the gem to the side. Scrooge watched its descent and reached down for it when Goldie grabbed his wrist and tugged him back towards her.

“I’ve heard enough from you already. Now get back over here, you condescending old sourdough!”

Scrooge hesitated for only a moment as he thought about grabbing the diamond, but decided that Goldie’s open arms were much more inviting. He had to finish what he’d started, after all, and there were some things he didn’t need to have telepathy to understand.

As their beaks crashed together again, he smiled and pulled her as close as possible. She loved him, and he wouldn’t let her live that down anytime soon.

[popculturebuffet]

Final Space: And Into The Fire Review or Now with 110% More Homoerotic Telepathy

Welcome  new and old to my first Final Space review! If you’ve never seen the blog before, and given this is the first “new” series i’ve covered as it come out in some time that’s probably quite a few of you, welcome. I’m Jake, I do recaps and reviews of various animated shows and comics, mostly just stuff I want to do, often on comission (5 dollars an episode if theres any episode of the first two seasons of this show or any episode of any other show you’d like tos ee me cover), or for my patreon patreon.com/popculturebuffet. And it is my utmost honor to add this show to my rotating roster of shows I cover as they come out. 

I friggin love Final Space. I was intrigued by it back when TBS released the animatics alongside Close Enough (Wth the two shows ironically finally together on HBO max as of earlier this month), for their doomed block. I heard a lot of good things about season 1.. and let it get away from me, not watching it till Season 2. But both seasons had more than enough to pull me in with intriguging characters, even greater jokes and a truly unique idea for a premise involving giant monsters, an edltrich god and lots of cookies. 

So while it took an extra year given Covid, I’m super friggin pumped to get into season 3 at long last after the hell of a cliffhanger, especially since ironically last night I saw Steven Yeun’s oscar nominated performance in “Minari”. Now i get to watch him play a cat teenager again too.. and in a few days Mark friggin Grayson. It’s a good week to be a fan of his is what i’m saying and a good week in general. 

Previously on Final Space Yo!: Since it’s been a year and while the series provides  a recap , I’m going to be doing these anyway so:

Our heroes finally got all 5 dimensional keys and freed Bolo, and in the process also freed Avacato from Invictus, the horrifying entity controlling final space. Meanwhile Tribore got Sheryl to stop being a selfish prick and she joined the team trying to be a better mother from now on. But freeing Bolo came at a high cost as Nightfall sacrified herself as the sixth key (KVN was natrually both Gary and Bolo’s first choice, but was inllegible. ) So we ended the season with our heroes entering Final Space and Gary reuniting with Quinn.... while Invictus loomed. So over a year later we finally get some answers so join me under the cut for spoilers, recaps, and homoerotic text ahoy. 

Something i’m doing since both the roster keeps changing.. and as I correctly guessed from the trailer, and the general tone of the promos for this season, that everyone won’t be all together all season.. or even in one piece.. i’ll be doing a silver age style roll call to let us know who all we have on the Team Squad for the episode Roll Call: Gary, Quinn, Avacato, Little Cato, Ash, Fox, KVN, HUE, AVA, Sheryl, Bolo, and Tribore

So we pick up right where we left off, Gary tearfully reuniting with Quinn, with Quinn wishing he hadn’t come for her, and Gary being Gary naturally having ignored that, and actually been more determined since that made it forbidden which made it extra tempting and him want to extra do it. God I missed this glorious idiot let me tell you. 

So things are quickly interrupted by invictus, who turns out to be a giant flaming head.. thing... and chases them and the crimson light, which has to start speeding with our heroes tethered to the outside, Quinn holding onto Gary. 

So we get one hell of a thrilling chase as the Crimson Light outspeeds the demon head and runs into two titans, but Bolo shows up to take out one, with Mooncake trying his dimension shattering blast thingy on Invictus.. and naturlaly g ven this is the big bad we need to show off how horrying they are, and it does NOTHING. But Gary catches his little buddy so we’re alright. 

Sheryl also shows off her badass bonafieds by LIGHTFOLDING THROUGH A TITAN... granted she still has some parenting skills to learn as “lightfolding while your son is hanging out the back through an edltrich god” really isn’t a motherly thing to do.. but neither is trying to murder your child several times or blaming him for how shitty your life turned out so ANYTHING is a step up for her. 

But.. it’s not enough. While she does manage to kill ONE the Crimson Light is too badly damaged to go on and we get two tragic deaths in one go... The Team Squad is forced to abandon the Crimson Light.. and AVA is too damaged to Upload into HUE. “I’m Sad” “For who?” “For you.. and for us. “ God damn Tom Kenny is amazing. You don’t need me telling you that, but sometimes you need a reminder. 

So our heroes end up on a desolate mystery world, stranded in final space with no ship, no suplies and no hope. The only thing to do now is survivie and hope they can continue the mission at some point. 

ONE MONTH LATER

Things have not gotten any better, as naturally , our heroes have only found weird cartoon eyed worms that regrow their heads when you bite them off. So while this means unlimited food, it’s also disgusting and Garry hates it. “This may be a head but it tastes like a butt”. Quinn and Tribore are with him and Quinn hasn’t been ready to talk about her experiences trapped in this hellscape and still isn’t but being a good dude, Gary dosen’t push her on it. Though the weird red veiny thing on her arm tells me maybe one of you should speed that up before she explodes or gets cronnenburgy. Just saying. I’ll also say i’m not huge on the one month time skip, as while I feel they probably have a reason for being that specific i’ts a bit TOO long and I question why have that long a period of a jump, not the longest but still long enough for things to happen with nothing changingin that time? Still it’s a minor nitpick in an otherwise fantastic episode so I can let it go, I just don’t get it. 

What we do get is some Gary Corpses dropping and Invictius puppeting them... i’m with gary that is bowel openingly scary. I also do like how despite the FAR more dire circumstances, they still get in the requisite shenanigans this series requires. I’ts not to the network mandated subplot levels where it distracts, but it’s enough to help ease the terror of the situation and isn’t around for situations like the opening where it really SHOULDN’T be. As the series always has when something big happens, the bollocks goes away. Once we’re in between we can get back to literal pissing contests, KVN leading a crowd to their deaths and HUE in a pimp hat like god intended. 

So yeah our heroes have to outrun the horrible horde of Gary’s, though Little Cato catches on something’s wrong as Tribore makes gary cary him as foreshadowing for later and Sends mooncake down to asssit. Our heroes escape.. but a cave in happens.

After the break, Gary wakes up confused with the party now split in two: Gary, Quinn, KVN, Tribore and HUE on one side and Avacato, Ash, Fox, Little Cato and Sheryl on the other. So Gary does the logical thing... and take his shirt off telling Avacato to feel him. 

I mean I didn’t even ship them before this scene but... Gary claims because of their bond he can telepahtically connect with Avacato. That’s normal Gary shenanigans.. except not only does he shrug off his girlfriend asking why they can’t do that.. but it WORKS. We have a scene of the two telepahtically talking in a wheatfield that is so homerotic I guarantee there only wasn’t the Careless Whisper sax because they couldn’t afford it.. or their saving it for later this season. Look sometimes you don’t ship a ship because you just.. dont’ care that strongly one way or another and sometimes you just need an incredibly gay scene to see the light. Same thing happened with Weblena same thing here. 

Fox also says “that was glorious to watch” same man. That was freaking art. So our heroes split up into three plots. As usual for me

Team Gary: So yeah... Triobore’s pregnant. No way to really softball into that. He’s been pregnant this whole time. So we get a stupid and mildly horrifying gross out sequence with Gary having to look Triobore in teh eyes and Quinn having to “uncork him”. Which is code for ... you know what i’m not going to say it. If you’ve seen the episode you know and if not your better off not visualizing it trust me. Point is this whole sequence is dumb and the worst part of the episode by far. And the series CAN do good gross out. While Olan Rodgers regrets it, the pissing contest was one of the funniest scenes of season 2, and managed to make a gross idea on paper actually pretty damn funny. This.. this is just “Haha males giving birth and tribore’s an asshole”. There’s no joke here just a .. plug. .. gah.. the vomit is rising let me tell you. 

We do get something good out of this nightmare, Tribore’s son who hatches as the army of gary’s dig their way in, Quanstranstro, who rapidly ages into a stylsih spanish speaking adult badass. He is fucking awesome and a great addition to the team and the sheer.. oddity of his birth is wonderful even if the actual birthing was not. Then the climax happens so before that. 

Team Avacato:

Avacato and Co come across a sleeping giant robot cyborg .. thingy. Naturally Fox wakes him up. Little Cato remains not suprised. It occelates between panicking over it’s legs being gone and amenisa and is pretty damn funny. It’s voiced by John Dimagio. But it gets serious as we find out nothing has ever made it out of final space, and things.. change the longer there there. And Quinn’s been there several months if not a year. Whuh oh. This part is much better both due to better jokes and plot advancment.. though again Quanstrano is still fucking amazing. 

Team Bolo: Bolo meanwhile returns and fights a titan, and has mooncake help him rather htan join the others, but looses, hitting the planet with his body.. I mean he might not get back up.. but the impact shatters the caverns and causes an explosion. Everyone but Gary, Quinn, KVN and HUE are MIA, as our remaining party find earth floating overhead. 

TO BE CONTINUED> 

Final Thoughts: A decent start to the season. Like I said the whole birthing sequence can die in a fire and reminds me of the terrible comedy subplots adult swim wanted grafted onto two episodes.. but otherwise it’s a tense stark opener that sets up the bleak tone while still keeping the series rediciulous shenanigans in tact. It’s the perfect welcome back after so long. I mean the gay telepathy alone would make it a winner. 

Next Time on This Blog: We dive into a little history with HIsteria. See you at the next rainbow. 

[ask-the-party-god]

Ask The Party God - Timeline

hi hi! as i mentioned earlier, i wanted to talk about my specific timeline so you guys are more or less aware of my situation when sending asks! thats me up there! the best doggy girl around ;o

as far as i am aware, theres not much of a difference between mine and... other timelines as far as the game goes! we beat sburb, we arrived to earth-c, we settled down, you know! the usual! i have my tower on a nice island, but its so far away from everything i barely go there, its... lonely!

i have a smaller house in the troll kingdom though! its a bit on the outskirts and like ten minutes away from dave and karkats, but i still crash at theirs or roses or roxys or johns way more often... X) its pretty standard all things considered, but i do have a bit of a basement lab to mess around with some side-projects of mine!

that aside... lets see...

thats john! my lovely ecto-bro! :D hes been a bit down in the dumps for a while so i try to cheer him up and keep him company <3 he lives in the outskirts of the human kingdom bordering with the consort kingdom, in a little mixed village... recently hes started to grow his hair out a bit too! i swear its just laziness so he doesnt have to take care of that messy mane, but i do think itd look cuter longer sooo...

he doesn’t... do much, which is why i have been trying to cheer him up and be around lately! he’s a bit more active at least and talks with the others, but i do wanna encourage him more >:/

5/8/20 edit: thats june egbert, my adorable ecto-sis whom i adore so so so so very much!!! weve been hanging out a bunch since her latest birthday!

shes been doing a lot better! more energetic, more open about the things that worry her... i only wish her the best of the best for the future, and im sure well be having lots of fun together from now on! :D

of course theres dave and karkat!!! they live together in the troll kingdom and have the moooost adorable domestic life i have ever seen, swoooon~ that being said theyre two awkward bottoms that couldnt realize their feelings even if they wrote a heartfelt love letter to each other and read it aloud, soooo its a... work in progress! i have tried nudging things along but thats an even worker in progresser, whoops

they also dont do much other than laze about most of the time, but dave has some creative side-projects with music and art that he shows me from time to time!

rose and kanaya maryam-lalonde!!! two absolutely lovely ladies whom i looove very very much! ;o their place is at the carapace kingdom, but kanaya spends a good deal of time in the brooding caverns as the matriarch of the troll race! i helped them install a transportalizer to speed things up so they have more time for each other, if you catch my drift ;)

about a year ago or so, rose got really sick for a short while, but she recovered and has been her usual lovely self since! since that scare though, they have been considering the idea of expanding their family! they could adopt of course, but they wanna try other stuff first! i occasionally help kanaya at the caverns with ectobiology machinery trying to find a way to properly mix troll and human genes, but its not exactly... easy

those are jane and jasprose! janes technically my mom but ive always seen her as a sort of cousin! we dont chat much but shes not bad! jasproses... well, you know! a wild kitty girl that knows how to have fun, hehehe, i hang out with her far more than my doggy alignment would have you know! ;o

a while back jane seemed pretty serious about running for office, and maybe because rose was in a bad spot or something, but jasprose started to pop up more and more often in public, and specifically messi around with jane? eventually she seemed to just lose interest in politics entirely and, while they havent said anything officially, i heard the cheshire cutie pops over by janes way too often to be just friendly visits ;o

roxy and callie!!! both of them came as non-binary around the same time, probably after talking it out for a while! hehe, rox has got that strider style going, and callie has been wearing their old wig more often in public! roxy and i have been messing around with their old lab equipment trying to give callie a fun surprise, but as it turns out messing around with basic biology with tech made to be used by 13 years old requires a looooot of tinkering... maybe some time?

i love them a bunch! theyre not really together i dont think so? but im pretty sure theyre more than just good friends that live together! im pretty sure callies still experimenting with identity and labels so, i wont pry really!

two cool dudes~ jake and dirk are nice, dirks a bit shy but ive gotten him to open up about robotics and we talk from time to time! jakes pretty much like jane, i pretty much see him as my cousin! we go hiking around from time to time in the weekends im not busy doing other stuff! :B

dirk got really concerned about rose when she had her episode, but dave helped him keep his cool about whatever was going down, and they hang out about once a month or so! also i was never sure whether dirk and jake USED to be dating or are STILL dating or whatever but, hey, much like with rox and callie, im not gonna pry!

tereziiiii :( shes away from earth-c plundering the corpse of paradox space! we barely see her but we keep in contact and send her supplies out into the furthest ring!

we worried for a bit that she was focusing too much on vriska and harming herself being out there, we kind of made it work in the end! some of our other friends are still out there and theres the possibility of finding some weird remnant of a timeline or something, so she keeps watch in case she can guide someone still living or trapped back to safety... and in the meantime she keeps watch for vriska, too, of course- ugh, i sorta just wish she got back already, im sure her being around would also encourage john to be more active! but as long as shes safe...

davepeta!!! the coolest cat around B) ive not... seen them in person since our little encounter near the green sun, but, terezi bumped into them a while back and sent a selfie! i dunno what theyre doing out there, but they mentioned about popping by earth-c eventually, sooooo, weve been holding onto a welcome celebration for a few months now!

and i think thats all? uuuh, if i can think of anything else i will add it, and you guys can ask me anything that wasnt clear or to elaborate on other stuff! hope this gives all of you a better picture of whats been going on in my life! :p

[reality-warp]

A/N: So I finished Jedi: Fallen Order and sweet God it was way better and more emotional than I was prepared for. And then before I knew it my mind starting rolling out this idea before I could slam on the brakes. What else is new?

With work stress, difficult physiotherapy, and seasonal affective disorder all kicking my butt right now, theres no way in hell I’m going to have the time or enegry to turn this idea into an acctual polished fic. But after the idea refusing to leave me alone several weeks I decided I just needed to sit down and get the beginning out of my system.

Not my best work by a long shot, but it’s been so good to finally get writing again after a year of struggling.

Set post-game, this follows crew of the Mantis as they start their search for others who survived Order 66, and opens with the POV of one ex-Jedi Healers padawan (alien OC) hiding out in a hospital on Lothal...

Remedial Biomancy - Part 1/5 Auri

The first thing all padawans learned when they apprenticed as healers in the Jedi Temple was that your hands were always going to be the bloodiest.

Bloodier than any knights. Bloodier than any murderer. And if you chose the path of healing, you were going to be living up close and personal with suffering, pain, and not always be able to help. It was not a job for the faint of heart, or for the thin-skinned. But Auri Madraan doubted even Master Sayf, the man who’d taught her everything she knew about the horrors and wonders of being a Jedi Healer, would have been able to remain stoic in the face of all this. 

Bodybags lined the room.

Dozens of them lined up in neat rows stretching from one end of the cold storeroom to the other. Twenty-six men. Fifteen women. Forty-one in total. She knew because it had been her job to count, scan and evaluate each one of them. She’d already finished the details of the last entry on her datapad, and now she just found herself staring into the cold room, struck hollow by the stark emptiness of it against her senses.

The absolute silence of life in a room so crowded.

“Medic Rinna,” The tinny voice of her droid assistant using her fake name broke through her daze, floating over from after making his final scan. “I believe that was the last one. Shall I transmit the results directly to Head Medic Jorran?”

Auri shook her head, both in reply and attempting to pull herself together, rubbing her tired eyes and tapping the save function on her datapad. She’d been awake for well over thirty-two hours and desperately needed to sleep. But this was something she always made herself do every time there was a death.

Master Sayf had always said one should never let lost life become something that felt normal…

“No, that’s ok PANN. I’ll deliver it myself,” she answered, her voice a bit crackly from hours of not speaking.

Her Prognosis Analytic Neural Network droid—more commonly referred to as PANN—bobbed in the air where he hovered, amber optical sensors flickering over her face. She could feel him resisting the urge to share how high her cortisol levels were, and that she would start to become dangerously inefficient if she stayed awake much longer. But even if she were already tucked up in her tiny room in the hospital staff quarters, she doubted she would have been able to shut her eyes for the thoughts and images burning through her mind.

There had been another tunnel collapse in the Lothal mines a day ago, and the men and women now lined up on the floor of the hospital basement were the only ones lucky enough to have been close to the entrance for their bodies to be dug out. The initial evaluations of the first-aiders and Auri’s reports both read suffocation and crush syndrome as the cause of death—no need for full autopsies or further investigation. That was what Head Medic Jorran had made clear what he expected to see, and consequences to anyone who thought otherwise.

But Auri knew differently.

She knew the truth of what had killed these people. She’d known the moment she’d touched a hand to the brow of one of the young men, the story of his broken body unfolding out before her like a story in black bruises and shattered bone.

They hadn’t died from lack of oxygen, they’d been killed when a toxin in the earth they’d been mining had been released as a gas. The Imperial mining operation running the dig had realised what had happened as their workers began dropping, and they had quickly collapsed one of the tunnels in an effort to both cover it up and stop the gas from escaping.

No one else knew. And if her Imperial loyalist boss had his way, no one else ever would.

Only her.

The thought made her want to be sick. She might have done just that were it not for the whooshing sound of the elevator doors opening just behind her, the sounds of footfalls on the metal floor.

“Hey Rinna, I hoped I’d find you down here—” Lyle, her co-worker and fellow junior medic broke off halfway through his sentence behind her, clearly noticing the contents of the room for the first time. She heard the air leave him in a single stunned rush, like someone had jabbed him in the solar plexus. “Maker, I’d heard it was bad, but this…”

Auri didn’t answer or turn to look at him.

Lyle was another recent emergency employee of the short-staffed Lothal capital hospital. He was human, blonde, good looking, and unfortunately just enough aware of it for it to be utterly confused by her disinterest. They’d been working the same shifts for the past two months, and Auri wasn’t sure why, but he had started developing what a charitable person would have called a fondness for her. An uncharitable person would have called it annoying. Her polite but repeated rejections only seemed to urge him on, and he always seemed to turn up when she most wanted to be alone…

This was definitely one of those times.

“You ok?” He asked her earnestly, coming up and placing a too-familiar hand on her shoulder, apparently completely unaware what a stupid question it was.

No, she wanted to say. To scream.

To yell that nothing about this was ok.

That she hadn’t been ok for the past five years.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” she lied, clipping her datapad back onto her belt and turning past him towards the elevator. She refused to look back at him or the forty-one bodybags filled with people who would never have their truths heard.

Who would never get justice.

She stabbed the button for the top floor without waiting, and Lyle quickly dashed after her, slipping in just in time and almost getting his scrubs caught in the door. A significant part of her really wished they’d cut him off before he could get inside.

“Rinna,” he started, once again reaching to touch her shoulder, but clearly thought better of it this time when she shifted away. “You sure you’re alright? You covered a triple shift today, and you look kinda… well, paler than usual.”

Something halfway between a laugh and a snort escaped her before she could stop it.

Ex-Jedi padawan Auri Madraan was a haedrathi, an uncommon near-human species from the Haedra system whose only real biological difference to humans was that they’d evolved in underground caverns, which meant their bodies didn’t process vitamin D in the same way. The result was naturally pasty skin, snow-white hair, and eyes so sensitive to light that they had to be covered by protective black contact lenses near constantly to prevent blindness.

She was likely the palest being on this entire damned planet.

How this guy had managed to become a medic, she had to wonder sometimes…

“I’m fine, Lyle. Just tired. And doing autopsy scans of tunnel collapse victims isn’t high on my list of favourite things…” she trailed off into the silence of the elevator, the only noises breaking the tension the whooshing of the passing floors. 

She sighed heavily, rubbing her eyes again. She had been working herself harder than normal, but focus and eventual exhaustion seemed to be the only way to keep her thoughts and nightmares at bay lately. It was clearly taking its toll on her temper—and for all his dogged determination to get her to swoon over him like the other nurses did, Lyle was only being kind. 

“Sorry. Yes, I’m ok. Anyway, what are you doing down here? Didn’t you finish half an hour ago?” She asked more gently this time.

Lyle scratched awkwardly at the back of his neck as the elevator continued its rapid ascent, and even though she wasn’t looking at him, she could feel his gaze running over her.

“You’re going to deliver those reports in person, right? I thought I could keep you company on the way to Jorran’s office, if you like. Give you an excuse to get out of the quickly.” he offered, an almost painful note of hope in his voice. “Look, I’ve been meaning to ask if you’d like to spend more time together? Like, maybe… as a date?”

Auri only managed to restrain her sigh by virtue of the fact that at least he’d managed to wait until they were out of the room full of dead bodies before trying to officially ask her out. If he hadn’t, her training might have failed her entirely, and she’d have simply brained him with her datapad and left him down there. 

She was saved from shooting him down by her droid rounding on her, a distinctly disapproving note in its metallic voice.

“Medic Rinna, I really must insist you engage in at least one REM sleep cycle as soon as possible. Your cortisol levels are impractically high, and—”

“Yes, thank you PANN,” she interrupted the fussing droid, cutting him off before he could launch into a full-blown lecture. “I’ll get some sleep as soon as I’ve delivered the reports. Why don’t you both go on to the dorms and get plugged in to charge for the night.”

“But—” PANN and Lyle started at the same time.

“I’ll be five minutes max. No need for an escort,” she cut them both off, deliberately not meeting Lyle gaze. The elevator came to a stop at their floor, the doors whooshed open and Auri quickly stepped out before either of them could try and stop her.

Out of the corner of her eye, Lyle looked crestfallen, but PANN just grumbled, immediately floating away back towards the staff quarters at the other end of the building.

She’d tried tinkering with the little medical droids AI processor a few years ago before arriving on Lothal in an effort to improve his analytical speed, but it had somehow affected his personality algorithms too. Now instead of being a clinically detached medical encyclopaedia, he fussed when her stress levels got too high and chipped in with sarcastic commentary whenever she least needed it, and she had no idea how to fix it. It was like having a nagging metallic nursemaid following her around every day. She’d found herself cursing the fact that she’d never taken any programming courses back during her training; but metal, chips and circuit boards had never been her area of expertise…

Cal had always been way better with that stuff anyway.

The sound of his name, even inside her own head was enough to send a lance of pain through her chest. She buried it quickly before it could show on her face, forcing a small, weak smile into its place.

“Thanks for offering, Lyle. But I’d rather just get this done and go to bed. I’ll see you for the next shift,” she said over her shoulder.

“Yeah, sure,” he mumbled, failing to hide his disappointment as she strode off. “Night, Rinna.”

Auri started making her way towards the Head Medic’s office on the far side of the building, but instead of heading there directly, she turned down another hallway and made a detour towards the recovery wards.

There was someone more important she needed to see first…

Three minutes later she was swiping her ID card to enter the paediatric wing, the smallest but also most colourfully painted section of the hospital by far. The wards weren’t particularly big, only four beds to a room, and at this time of night, all the kids in them were fast asleep. The one Auri entered was at the end of the long, brightly painted hallway, and it was the only one with just a single kid curled up on his own inside.

“Rinna?” The boy mumbled, hearing the door sliding open as she entered, turning over to peer sleepily at her from under the blankets. It hadn’t been safe for Auri to use her real name in five years, but the smile the little boy gave her as he saw her was always just enough to ease the ache of missing it.

The kid coiled under the hospital blankets with bio-monitor patches all over his chest was human, small even for his years, with dark hair, coppery tanned skin, vivid blue eyes, and an infectious grin in the rare moments when he was feeling ok. His entire family had been living on Lothal since the days of the Republic, and the day he’d first come to the ward a week ago and met Auri, he’d excitedly told her that he loved haedrathi pop music, was a crack shot with a slingshot, and was going to be a pilot one day.

The name on the bed chart read: BRIDGER, EZRA.

“Hey little soldier,” she smiled at him, this time a genuine one, quietly shutting the door behind her. “I just came to check up on you before my shift ends. How are you feeling?”

“Better,” Ezra lied, trying to sit up. “I don’t even think I’ll even need my meds tonight.”

Auri gave him a sceptical look, eyeing his shaky arms struggling to support him, and the low blood oxygen level reading on his bio-monitor.

It turned out the same toxins that had killed the workers in the mines had been leaking into the water supply a couple of weeks before, and Ezra had got a heaping dose before his parents realised what was wrong. Now it was wreaking havoc on his organs, the toxin fiendishly difficult to purge, especially for smaller children whose body mass was less than an adult. Ezra was barely six, short and skinny as a rail, and he was getting sicker by the day, even with the treatments and Auri’s regular help during their checkups.

Still, he was a fighter, and stubborn as a Loth-cat. Especially when it came to foul-tasting meds.

She placed a hand on one hip, trying not to smile.

“Oh really?”

Ezra scowled determinedly, but on his young round face, it was closer to a pout.

“Really!”

She raising a brow theatrically at him.

“Then I supposed you won't need this either?”

The kids face lit up as she pulled a little album stack out of her pocket and held it up—an innocent little palm-sized chip that stored sound data and could be plugged into any system or droid to play music. She’d managed to find one of the bands he’d mentioned while complaining how boring and quiet it was in the ward on his own, and she’d promised to bring it during her next visit.

She waved the album stack in front of him before setting it pointedly on the side table.

“Meds first, then music.”

Ezra pouted at her again, but dropped his little shoulders in defeat.

“Urgh, fine,” he grumbled.

Auri couldn’t help but smile sadly to herself as she opened the medication compartment on his bedside table, and began measuring out his prescribed dose of immune boosters. A nurse or med-droid would have been round later to give him his nightly meds, but they were so short-staffed at the moment that they likely wouldn’t have finally got to him until late at night. The kid was already struggling with his condition so much, she didn’t see any need to keep wake him once he finally managed to get some rest.

And she would have been lying if she said she hadn’t wanted to visit the one person in this hospital she actually enjoyed spending time with.

Once she’d double-checked the measurements, she pressed the little measuring cup into his hands and poured him a glass of water to wash it down with. Ezra took it without complaint but pulled a face as he gulped it down.

“Urgh! Why does it have to taste so bad?”

“That’s how you know it’s good for you,” she teased, setting the cup aside and handing the glass of water over. He took it gratefully as Auri pulled a pressure band out of the side table and wrapped it carefully around his skinny arm. “Just going to quickly check your blood pressure too, then you’re all done.”

In truth, she didn’t really need the band to check his blood pressure, but it gave the excuse she needed to get close enough to use her Biomancy.

She’d had the ability for as long as she could remember—a rare talent even among the Force sensitives that let her sense and read a persons life force through direct contact. It meant she’d effectively been able to tell when a person was healthy or sick since she was a child, and after years of training in the Jedi Houses of Healing she was now able to pinpoint and identify the cause of almost any pain or illness with a single touch.

Or in Ezra’s case, it allowed her to sense every part of his body that was struggling most against the poison in his system, and do what little she could during her checkup visits to help him. She’d added specific toxin absorbers into his daily meds to try and help take the pressure off his kidneys, used tiny amounts of Force biomanipulation to boost his white blood cell count, but to be honest there wasn’t an awful lot left she could do. Pretty soon the only thing she’d be able to do was numb his pain receptors so he could sleep comfortably. She hadn’t even been able to think about how she’d break the news to his parents that he was unlikely to ever fully recover…

Frustration and regret roiled deep in her chest as she read his bio-signs, seeing barely any improvement since she’d checked the day before. If only she could just do what she’d been trained for years by Master Sayf to do. To reach out with the Force and help heal the actual source of the problem, not just clumsily try to manage the symptoms. To be the healer she’d worked so hard to become since she’d first walked into the Jedi Temple at two years old.

But it was a different Galaxy now.

She’d only been on Lothal six months. If she cracked now, used her true power and took the risk of being found out, at best she’d have to flee. Start all over again.

At worst she’d be found by Purge Troopers and executed on the spot.

“Hey, Rinna,” Ezra asked abruptly, pulling her out of her morbid thoughts.

“Mmm?” She answered, pretending to check the pressure monitor before releasing the air and removing it from his arm. He pointed at a spot around her collarbone.

“What is that?”

For a second she didn’t know what he was looking at. Then she saw that he was pointing at the cord she wore around her throat. It must have crept up without her noticing, and was now barely peeking out over the neckline of her scrubs. She shrugged it back under the grey-green cloth a bit too quickly to be subtle.

“It’s nothing, little soldier. Nothing important.”

“I always see you wearing it, every time you visit,” he pressed, a tiny pout appearing again. “None of the other nurses or doctors ever wear any jewellery. How come you do?”

“Because this isn’t jewellery,” she answered automatically, then mentally kicked herself for it. Ezra just kept looking at her expectantly, and she knew instinctively he wasn’t going to let it go. So with a sigh, and against her better judgement, she pulled it out just enough for him to see the small jade green stone bound at the end. “It’s called a kyber crystal.”

Ezra’s vivid blue eyes went wide in wonder.

“Isn’t that what’d in Jedi lightsabers?” He breathed.

“They use to be. But not anymore,” she murmured, quickly tucking the cord back beneath her shirt. “It’s just a silly trinket. But one that you have to keep a real secret, ok? I’m not supposed to have it, and I’ll get in a lot of trouble if you tell anyone.”

He gave her a solemn look and a slow nod, his dark hair flopping adorably.

“I won’t tell.”

“Swear?”

He drew an X over his chest.

“Swear.”

Auri tried to regard him seriously but eventually smiled, unable to stop herself. He was a starry-eyed kid, but he was also the most honest and genuine person in this place.

“Good. Now let’s get you tucked in. Your folks will be in to visit tomorrow morning and you don’t want to sleep through it.”

He nodded, coughing a little as he pulled the covers up to his chin again, peeking out and giving her and the album stack on the side table another hopeful look.

“Can you put the music on?”

Auri rolled her eyes with a smile, but nodded, bopping him lightly on the nose with the stack.

“Ok, but only on the lowest volume.”

She got up from the cot and started plugging the stack into the small radio near the door. Ezra coughed again, a bit harder this time. And then a strange noise came from him; a kind of gasping wheeze that quickly became a throaty cough, like he was struggling to catch his breath. Auri turned instinctively, feeling the pull of something wrong through her senses, only to see the colour had suddenly drained almost from Ezra’s round cheeks, leaving him a sickly grey colour.

“Ezra? What’s wrong?” She asked, dread creeping into her chest.

“R-Rinna…” he mumbled, sitting up and swaying dangerously on his cot, “I d-don’t feel good…”

He slumped sideways, almost falling out of the bed entirely. Auri shot across the room and caught him by the shoulders just in time. She tried to sit him up again, but he’d gone almost entirely limp, eyes rolling back in his head.

“Ezra? Ezra!"

He didn’t respond. Only continued to wheeze out breaths that were far more laboured than they should be.

Not wasting a second Auri rolled up his sleeve and touched her entire hand to his upper arm. That one solid point of contact brought a fresh flood of sensations, and she instantly understood, the breath slipping out of her in horror.

“Oh no…”

She could feel the frantic flutter of his pulse through her senses like a hummingbirds wings. Feel the pain of his insides and every laboured breath as if it were her own. The toxin had finally found its way into his heart, and the shock of it was causing the organ to beat wildly out of control.

Not wasting a breath, she yanked back the sheet and laid him out flat on the cot, tilting his head back to open his airway. He was so small it barely took even her any effort to lift him, his little form not even taking up half the space on the cot.

“Keep fighting hard as you can, little soldier,” she whispered, pulling out a syringe and a vial of cardiac stabiliser from the nearby emergency cart. She didn’t realise her hands were trembling until it took her three tries to get it filled correctly.

If this didn’t work…

She returned to his side, sliding the needle into his bicep and depressed the plunger, keeping a hand firmly on his arm and letting her Biomancy monitor his response better than any of the equipment around her could.

But…

“No, no come on, please…” she cursed under her breath, dread beginning to turn to panic.

It wasn’t working. She’d managed to slow his pulse and calm his adrenaline with the stabilising drugs, but it wasn’t enough. His heart was still beating out of rhythm and getting quickly worse. If that poison stayed in his body any longer she knew it was going to destroy his heart beyond any hope of repair…

The sight of those bodybags filling the room downstairs invaded her mind again. The image of one more of them, slightly smaller than the others—

No.

The thought rang through her head with the long dead voice of her master, and the panic in her chest stilled into sudden, familiar calm as she looked down at Ezra again. This time with all the years of lessons and practice she’d gone through to get here rushing in to fill the void.

To heal a hurt, you must first understand the hurt, padawan.

To ease the pain, you must know that pain.

She could still feel the poison lingering in him through her senses, could feel the damage it was doing through the contact. She also knew it wasn’t going to be enough to just remove some of it. Every last drop he’d managed to accumulate by drinking that contaminated water had to be pulled out if she was going to save him now.

So, taking one of his small, tanned hands in her considerably paler ones, Auri reached a hand out to hover over his chest, stretching out with the Force. It was like flexing an aching muscle that had long gone unused, and for a moment, she wasn’t sure she was going to be able to do it. 

But then, her thoughts brushed up against a cluster of something cold and foreign. Something that wasn’t supposed to be there—a knot of wrongness caught up in the complex weave of life that made up all of Ezra.

She reached out further, and her mind stumbled over another. And another. And then another. Feeling the pressure building in her own head with the concentration, she forced herself to focus harder, latching her will onto all those knots of wrongness until she could feel every molecule of the poison scraping against her thoughts—a million pinpoints on a map laid out in the shape of the boy before her.

Then, as gentle as she could, Auri began to pull on all those pinpoints of wrongness.

If anyone had been watching, it might have looked at first like the young haedrathi medic was simply praying over the kid, one hand holding his while the other hovered over his chest. But then, ever so slowly, what looked like tiny beads of pale orange sweat began to appear all over the boy’s clammy skin. At first they were almost unnoticeable, but quickly they grew, forming together into bigger drops that began to slowly rise off him entirely, floating in dozens of perfect spheres up into the air.

She didn’t stop until all of those droplets had risen off Ezra’s clammy skin, and only when every last bit had left him did she shift her hand slightly, condensing them all into a single floating sphere the size of a large marble in the air.

Her head beginning to ache with the strain, Auri automatically reached a hand towards the side cart at the edge of the room, and a test tube flew into her grip as if pulled by a magnet. Sweat began to bead on her own brow as she guided the floating ball of poison into the glass before finally releasing her focus. The pale orange liquid fell straight into the container as if someone had finally turned the gravity back on, and Auri felt her hands trembling as she quickly stoppered it.

Her perception of the rest of the room flooded back in as she pulled in a few steadying breaths, if someone had turned the volume back on for the rest of the world…

Only then did she hear a noise come from directly behind her.

Auri whirled to face it, her head spinning and heart pounding as she automatically shoved the test-tube full of poison into her back pocket. Lyle was stood in the open doorway to the ward, a confused look on his face. For a horrible moment, she thought he’d seen everything, his gaze flickering in bewilderment between her, the boy on the cot, and the empty syringe of cardiac stabilisers on the side table. But the look softened to worry as he saw the expression on her face.

“Rinna, what happened? Is he ok?”

She was saved from trying to flat out lying when Ezra groaned. She turned back to him to see the boy’s vivid blue eyes flickering open as he began to regain consciousness.

“R-Rinna?” He rasped, and she immediately knelt next to him, gently stroking his messy hair back from his face.

“It’s ok. You’re ok, little soldier. You just had a bad spell,” she assured, calmly as she could despite her own racing heartbeat. He coughed a bit and she helped him take a few more gulps of water before gently laying him back down on the pillows. “Try to sleep. You’ll feel better in the morning, I promise.”

He was out barely ten seconds later, the exhaustion of having the poison forcibly purged from his body taking its toll.

But at least now he would live.

Auri covered him in an extra blanket from one of the other beds, and set the bio-monitoring system to alert her if there was any change to his vitals. Then, once she was sure he was as comfortable and safe as she could possibly leave him, she turned back to face a concerned-looking Lyle. He was gazing at her like he was desperate to somehow comfort her, but had no idea what to do or say to help.

“What happened?” He asked quietly the moment they were both outside.

“His heart, it started going tachy right after I gave him his meds. I barely got the stabilisers into him in time…”

It wasn’t a complete lie, but she still hated the taste of it on her tongue. Lyle glanced down at her still trembling hands, and once again she could see him barely resisted the urge to try and take hold of one.

“You’ve done everything you can,” he told her, not realising the truth of those words. “But you really should sleep now too, Rinna.”

She nodded, glancing back at the door to Ezra’s room once more before turning back to Lyle.

“I’ve changed my mind,” she said quietly. He looked at her in confusion, and she gave an anaemic smile that she couldn’t quite make reach her eyes. “Would you mind walking me to Jorran’s office after all?”

It took him a second to process what she’d said, but once he did he nodded vigorously.

“S-sure! Yeah, of course.”

Auri followed her colleague down the hallway, falling into an exhausted step beside him. But not before quietly pulling the test tube of poison out of her back pocket and dropping it quietly into a nearby biohazard bin.

Much as she hated to admit it, PANN and Lyle were both right—she really did need all the sleep she could get tonight.

Tomorrow she was going to have to start planning her escape from Lothal.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5

[pwnyta]

Full Endgame spoilers/review:

(TL;DR: It was really fucking good. Theres some bad obviously but overall worth it. Even after reading the spoilers and feeling like I may not like it as much as I thought I would... I actually liked it more.)

- - So as I said I loved the movie I had some gripes but overall I thought it was one hell of a fun, entertaining movie. I'll go by each characters story in my review saving Cap and Tony for last.

Natasha- Honestly? Though I think the MCU dropped the ball on the 0G6 being a believable family... I think Nats role in this movie was sweet. I really like the scene where Tony Nat and Bruce were laying down talking about Strange and the stones. It was really cute but it really made me wish we got to see this earlier. Joss dropped the ball hard in AoU. Ive said it one and I'll say it again. AoU should have been the movie where the Avengers were a solid unit throughout the movie.Nats death was... heroic but honestly her and Clint beating the shit out of each other because neither could stand the thought of the other being sacrificed was kinda funny and cute which is jarring to the story. It kinda sucks that she was fridged before the final battle though.

Clint- What are the fucking odds that every one of his family was dusted? But w/e. Clint having a wild sword battle in Japan... it was ridiculous and weird and IDK what they were thinking with that scene but it was played really dramatically but I laughed? Cuz it was so over the top and silly... even though he just slit that guys throat and Nats like :c Clint~ honey no its fine... and they hold hands over the guys warm corpse. LMFAO WHAT!? Im at least happy his kids got him back if nothing else.

Bruce- ... Bruce with Hulks big green body? NICE. Thats gonna have some interesting fanart I can already tell and I lift my glass to you. I once tried to draw a little comic where Bruce and Hulk separated but also had swapped bodies.... so Bruce had Hulks body but I never did finish it I wonder if I still have it saved somewhere. Anyways. Honestly? I found Bruce in this movie to be equal parts funny and annoying? Like it was a bit jarring sometimes that he was so lighthearted despite everything.

Thor- When I read the spoilers I thought I was gonna really dislike Thor but watching it I understood where Thor was coming from and I couldnt really blame him for spiraling and its not like anyone close to him seemed to even check up on him despite clearly knowing where he was. Im really sad that it took all those years and only until he was needed for someone to try and talk Thor through what he was going through. Im not annoyed with Thor. Im annoyed with the rest of them (minus Tony and I guess Clint? Considering.). Bruce was his friend in Ragnarok, Nat keeps talking about them being family, and Steve is their leader where the hell were they? Unless im missing something... I guess Valkyrie too but shes been picking up his slack as a leader and was holding the Asgardians together so I can cut her some slack. ANYWAYS. Thor was kinda funny in the movie but it was kind of hard to enjoy his goofiness. It kind felt like Tony in IM2. Speaking of Im glad Tony seemed really tolerant of Thors drunk behavior... I was sure he would throw a lot of shots like Rocket did. I wish they had a moment to talk about Thor self medicating with booze... Tonys been there. I get why they couldnt really but.. His scene with Frigga was really nice. Frigga is a bad bitch raised by witches and shit.... she knows all~ A wise woman that Frigga.

Scott- HOLY SHIT Did I love Scott in this movie. He was soo funny and cute... and bullied a lot. You know I have a thing for easily bulliable character. And Scott just got spanked left and right. His helpless goofiness reminded me of Harry from KKBB a little. He bounced off everyone well and it makes me kinda wish he was one of the OG6 instead of Clint. He was more of the heart that kept the Avengers together than anyone. Also him and Tony talking about Caps ass? HILARIOUS. Bisexual icons honestly. 'That suit did nothing for your ass.' 'No one asked you to look!' 'I think you look great Cap as far as Im concerned thats Americas ass!' and then later Caps all 'That IS Americas ass.' Unbelievable. But his best scene is still him reuniting with Cassie. She was so big! Im so happy she got her dad back... but Bruces failed time travel machine scene.... that was a close second. 'Somebody peed my pants... idk if it was baby me or old me........ or me me.' Also the 'whats up regular sized man' scene is longer and more hilarious than the preview showed. FUCK YOUR TACO SCOTT. At least Bruce is nice to him. I ship GreenAnt a little. Rocket petting Scott and mockingly calling him a puppy. SAME.

Rhodey- JESUS RHODEY. Speaking of hilarious idiots. Im glad he got a bigger roll in this movie but he didnt hug Tony when he got back so whats the point? BUT W/E... He was hilarious and amazing. It was nice to see him step up as one of the sorta leaders after the snappening. But he was also A HUGE FUCKING DORK THE ENTIRE WAY THROUGH. Thinking that a secret cavern with a spooky name would be boobytrapped like in Indiana Jones and trying to convince Nebula to be careful. Naming a bunch of shitty time travel movies to prove a point about time travel (with Scotts help) and going back in time to kill baby Thanos...and Bruce was like 'yeah... no...' and him fucking TRASHING the magic of the iconic opening scene of the first GotG where Quill is dancing.... 'so hes an idiot?' RHODEY PLEEEEAAASSSEEEE have mercy. Him and Nebula are a trip. Also I made a note to mention Don Cheadles BEAUTIFUL soft voice. So here it is. I love Don Cheadles beautiful soft voice. He had too few scenes with Tony but their first scene when Tony starts freaking out and hes trying to get Tony to calm down was pretty good... and god that ending.... ;-; How come Rhodey got NO lines while Tony was dying? But also in the same position I dont think Id have any words either. I too would just cry. And did... for Tony. But yeah besides his lack of scenes with Tony I really loved Rhodeys scenes. I usually do. Hes adorable.

Nebula: Sweetie... You are just amazing. Shes legit one of the best most solid characters in the movie. The opening scenes between her and Tony? FUCKING adorable. Im sad we dont see more of them after the time skip. I also wish we got a longer scene of Neb and Rocket talking when she gets to earth... I guess just seeing them sit together sadly was enough to portray the emotions but.... I MEAN. More Nebula wouldnt hurt anyone. Having to see two tortured versions of Nebula was upsetting. Future Nebula who lost so much and past Nebula still under Thanos' thumb. 'You can change!' 'He wont let me' OOF. Im sad that past Nebula was killed... but appreciate that even in that moment past Gamora was upset to see her be killed. Im glad with Present Neb, Gamora was so easily heel-face turned. She loves her sister. Also their moment after past Gamora beats up present Quill was hilarious 'Really? This is the guy?' 'The choices were him or a tree.' WHAT ABOUT DRAX, NEBULA?! I know I said I may not watch any MCU movies after this but I might tune in for GotG3 for Nebula (and Thor).

Steve: I actually ENJOYED Steve in this movie for the most part. For the first time in any movie... even by himself I kind of enjoyed Steve. Especially the scene when hes fighting himself and his past self says 'I can do this all day' and hes like 'Tst... yeah I know... okay' Like he was sick of his own damn bullshit. And frankly? Same. Also him whispering 'Hail hydra' to get the scepter? Hilarious. I cant help but see it as a knock at that shitty Hydra Cap comic that everyone hated. But despite me enjoying Steve for most of the film... the MCUs inability to write a good romance and pretending like Steve and Peggys relationship was a peak or something completely undoes it all. It would still NOT BE GREAT regardless but the fact the RUSSOS are the ones who brought Sharon into TWS in the first place makes it SO MUCH WORSE that Steve dipped out. Steve should have moved on... even if it wasnt with Sharon. They could have at least MENTIONED HER but they knew they couldnt because then it would be too highlighted that Steve is a fucking FUCK BOY who used the niece of the woman he loved as a surrogate and that him going back to the past means hes gonna be meeting little Sharon at some point. Also? Really? Steve you have this whole new family you supposedly love and can live your life with but you rather go back in the past because the first woman who was nice to you was there? Move on. Its so fucking weird that hes so obsessed with her. You have your childhood friend and the rest of your new friends... and supposedly a girlfriend. IDK how anyone could be happy with that ending for him. But I guess its in character... remember the note he sent Tony 'I've been on my own since I was 18.' What about Bucky? He was there with you and you had family in the Avengers supposedly. Natasha seemed to think so. YOURE SUCH A FUCKIN SCUMBAG STEVE. Jesus.

Tony: First of all Id just LOVED his scenes with Nebula as I said. He sat there patiently teaching how to play paper football and held her win. It was REALLY cute. When he passed out she picked him up off the floor and sat him down on the chair and pat him. REAL CUTE. He nicknamed her 'The Blue Meanie' its cute and he tried to give her the last of their food but she insisted he eat it. Bobbos eyes never looked more gorgeous than in that scene where Carol finds them honestly. Tonys I told you so was really really sad. It had a lot of feeling like that scene in AoU when he laughs hysterically and starts ranting? Rhodey tried to calm him down but he just ripped into Cap. Also he yanked off his arc reactor and I FULLY JUMPED IN PANIC because I forgot it wasnt in him. I fully flinched. But he pulled his heart out and gave it to Steve and then passed out. Tony and Peppers daughter is ADORABLE. And her interactions with Tony are so sweet. Domestic Tony is lovely. I love that when Steve and the gang roll up on him Morgan runs out during their discussion and is like 'Mom told me to come and save you....' and hes like 'Well Ive been saved!' REAL CUTE. Also he swore and his daughter copied him and hes like NOOOOO!!!!!!! LMAO. LANGUAGE Tony. Tony is motivated to fix things seeing that pic of him and Peter. Hes such a softie. IM REALLY REALLY SAD that we finally see Pepper kinda GET Tonys need to be Iron Man and is like 'But could you rest?'. The one time she encourages him to go back to be Iron Man and he fucking DIES. Im so sad for Pepper. But that scene between them where shes like 'We'll be ok.... you can rest now.' FUCK. Im crying again. That scene between him and Steve- 'Someone shoula warned you~' 'You did...' 'Oh did I? Thank god Im here' has the same energy as 'Who taught you how to dance?' 'You did.' 'Well Ive done a marvelous job!' It was pretty great. Tonys nicknames for Scott are 'Pissant' and 'Thumbelina.' Im not OVERLY fond of his scenes with Howard. But honestly? My brother is the same way with our dad... he just chooses to forget the bad stuff and focus on the few good times. I cant do that but if it made Tony happier then VERY WELL. I wish Tony coulda talked to Jarvis too tho... just a word... anything? Best Tony scene is Peter babbling about how he musta passed out because Tony was gone and and and and Tony just hugs him so tightly and Peters hugs back and is like :D 'this is nice'! Though that STARK contrast of them after Tony uses the gauntlet... and Peter is like 'Mr Stark... we won... we did it... no Mr Stark...' Big Simba and Mufasa feels (and kind of Hughes and Elicia tbh). Not cool Disney. I was already crying. Rhodey was the first to reach Tony and Tony couldnt say ANYTHING to anyone and Rhodey just pets his cheek... Tony was just looking around as his family just has to watch helplessly as hes dying and Pepper tells him its ok. His funeral was really nice. He recorded a message for everyone kind of like his message for Pepper on the ship. Everyone was there... I think even Harley (Im really sad we didnt see them get reunited even once). The scene with Happy and Morgan was really sweet. 'I'll buy all the cheeseburgers you want....' It was cool to because... ya know.... Jon Favreau. He got a really beautiful end. I wish he could just retire and live with Pep and Morgan... but if he had to die... that was a really lovely sendoff. SO ALL IN ALL. Awesome movie. I didnt get to see past elderly Steve passing the shield off to Sam... I'll have to rewatch it again when theres a better version. Especially for that fucking STUNNING end battle. Even with the shitty cam I watched it looked AMAZING and I cant wait for it in HD.

[crewhonk]

Glovebox

Warnings: Swearing, Fluff, bad poetry (w the first poem, not the second)

Pairings: Billy X Reader

Words: 4,000

AN: There’s a little bit of reference to the brain storming convo the Gorilla Gang had on Friday, and theres a specific reference to the thing that makes Annie (@dacre-thotgomery) want to die, so theres that! Enjoy! xx (shoutout to Rupi Kaur for Y/N’s poem)

Tag List: @veronica-lodge-photography  

Billy Hargrove had moved into Hawkins in the beginning of October. He rolled in with cold fall air, and the smell of Camel cigarettes, and with the motivation to dominate everyone in Hawkins high school. He started with Steve Harrington, belittling him in the hallways and on the basketball court, later beating him near death in later November and facing three months of community service in the soup kitchen. He also dominated most of the girl in Hawkins, minus a few and the few consisted of one girl in junior year who looked a little too much like his little sister, Max, Nancy Wheeler- as she was dating Jonathan Byers, the rest of the girls in happy relationships and then there was you. You, who was the Pom team captain, decathlon leader, and tutor of physics. You had healthy hair, you had a gorgeous smile, you had a sparkle in your eye and you volunteered on Saturdays at the soup kitchen. You weren’t exactly a stranger to him, you volunteered on the same days and he gave you rides to and from the kitchen. So why did Billy seem to almost avoid asking you to do anything? Literally, if he even wanted to hold hands you’d be down.

You pushed your tray away from you and smashed your face into the lunch table. The cool surface of the lunch table froze your face and you kicked your best friend, Jo when she laughed loudly at you. You straightened up after a few minutes and wiped away the forehead-shaped foundation mark from the table with your sweater sleeve.

“I mean, why doesn’t he even look at me outside of the Kitchen. I don’t understand? I’m hot, I’m talented, I’m fun, I’m down to make out and let him grab my butt I don’t understand.” You whined quietly. You didn’t want anyone outside of this table section to hear about your low-key obsession with the King.

“Honestly, I don’t know why he hasn’t even spoken to you because he’s literally undressing you with his eyes right now.” She laughed, sucking on the straw to her orange juice box. You turned around on the bench and caught Billy’s eye before his head whipped his gaze away from you.

“Oh, whatever, Joanne. You slept with him what? Two weeks ago? He’s obviously hung up on you.” You wrinkled your nose at her and held your apple in your hand like a Shakespeare skull. “Where for art thou is Joanne’s self-respect?”

“In my vagina-crevice.” She smiled back, taking your apple from your hand and biting a chunk out of it and slamming it back on your tray, making sure to bruise it.

“I hate you.” You sighed, shoving a handful of Goldfish in your mouth. Joanne laughed at you and swung her legs over the bench, slinging her backpack over her shoulder and pointing behind you.

“Incoming, dude.”

You were forced to turn around and came face to face with Billy Hargrove’s belt buckle. “Eye’s up here, Y/L/N.”

You felt blood rush to your neck, ears, and chest quickly and the room became very hot very quickly. You looked at him through your lashes, and he parted his lips at the angle he had of you.

“What do you want, Hargrove?”

“I want you to make coffee for us tomorrow.” You looked up at him, craning your neck to look fully up at him. His hand came up to hold your chin in-between his thumb and the crook of his pointer finger. You grabbed his wrist and shoved it away from you. “You can pick me up early and we can get coffee on the way— I’ll buy.”

“Well, I can’t let you do that the girl is never supposed to pay for the man.”

“First of all, that’s sexist. Second of all, you need to save for rent if you ever want to get out of that god-forbidden house. Third of all, I want to pay.” You said, standing up and pushing him away from you. He only smiled down at you and he picked your books up from the ground, leading you to your next class and walking in, placing the books down on your desk and ruffling your hair.

“See you tomorrow, then?” He asked, walking backward and biting his bottom lip while he smiled at you.

“I expect you to be half an hour early.” You confirmed. You sat down and twirled your pencil between your fingers and smiling to yourself. Carol, however, hadn’t looked away from you since the moment you two walked into the room. She popped a large bubble and chewed on the gum loudly.

“Finally, he got the balls to ask you out?” She asked, leaning over and kicking your calf muscle. You looked at her, brows furrowed and blinked slowly.

“Pardon?”

“He finally asked you out? He’s been planning to ask you forever, he just loses his mind whenever he sees you. He’s so freaked out because he doesn’t want to just fuck you.” She said, twirling the string of gum around her finger. You felt as if your heart and stomach dropped to your feet, leaving cold caverns in their place.

“He— um, he didn’t? We have uh, we have to volunteer tomorrow at the soup kitchen downtown. We didn’t start anything.” You blanched, feeling as if your eyes were going to fall out of your head. Carol’s eyes widened in fear and regret before she turned her body fully towards the front of the class. “Carol, what the fuck are you talking about?” She didn’t reply, only gripping her pencil harder in her hand and clenching her jaw tight.

When Billy showed up at your house the next morning half an hour early, you would have liked to be more prepared. You were trying your hair into a ponytail at the nape of your neck and no matter how hard you looked you couldn’t find your left shoe. Billy honked the horn once more and with a loud groan you gave up and shoved your foot in a similar shoe, hoping to any higher power that was out there that Billy wouldn’t notice.

When you got into his car, you had to look over at him and remind him that he needed to drive the car to get anywhere. When you looked at him, however, you were struck speechless by the look on his face. His mouth looked like there had been a smile carved into it so wide it showed all of his teeth. His blue eyes were shining with laughter that had yet to burst from his chest and there were wrinkles sprouting from the outer corners of his eyes like roots from a tree. As you caught your breath, he reached over and wiped a bit of toothpaste from the corner of your mouth.

“Who knew that someone who was so well put together and who was as cute as you could also be such a hot mess.” He laughed, pulling out into the street, not looking over to gauge your reaction at his compliment. Your jaw hit your toes, and you directed your attention out of your window to hide the giddy blush that was spreading over your entire body.

The drive to Starbucks was a quiet one, but the silence that you two sat in was anything but uncomfortable. The soft sounds of whatever pop radio station Billy was playing crooned words you didn’t bother paying attention to and the windows had been rolled down, letting the fresh late-spring air flood through the car. It smelled like water, and dew, and blooming flowers and smelled more and more like fresh coffee the closer you got to the cafe. The sun was shining down on the blue paint, and it glittered in response, shining in your eyes and warming your skin.

Billy pulled the car over and asked you what you wanted, grabbing his wallet from the glove box and dashing into the store— the desperation for caffeine making him rush. You waited for five minutes before he came back empty-handed.

“They’re just grinding the beans, and warming up the pastries for us— they said it would be about ten minutes before we get everything. Apparently, they’re technically not open yet-- but only a select few can resist the charm of Billy Hargrove.” He laughed, leaning on the driver side window. “You good out here while I make sure they get our orders right?”

“Yeah, I’m good in here. Be nice to the barista’s, William.”

“Okay I told you my full name in confidence and you’re using it against me, Doll?”

“I’m not stupid enough to believe that your mother signed off on a birth certificate where your name was Billy.”

“Billy is a perfectly fine name, you know!” He retorted, his tongue slipping past his teeth and running across his bottom lip. He tapped his hand on the car twice before straightening up and sauntering into the cafe, making sure to swing his hips just enough for your eyes to drift down to them. God, you were whipped and he didn’t even know it. Sure, you had found out yesterday from Carol that he apparently felt the same way, but she was known for stirring the pot when things got too quiet. She saw the way you reacted to Billy being in the room, and she especially saw the way your eyes sparkled when he talked to you. You were a smitten kitten and Carol was just shitting around, right?

You pondered the way your life was in Carol’s hands for another five minutes before you got restless and began seeing what you could entertain yourself with for the duration of your stay in this car. You picked the dirt from under your nails, but that only took fifteen seconds tops. You checked to see if your mismatched shoes (god help you) were tied, and you re-tied them. Then, your eyes drifted to the glove box. Billy made sure to always keep his favorite and most dear things to him in there if the need to flee ever came up. You knew opening it was a breach of trust and privacy and he had told you that if anything went missing from the box, he would probably die. (“jesus, who raised you to be so dramatic?” “mom watched a lot of soaps— it’s basically bred into me.” “please don’t say it like that.”)

Your fingers brushed along the handle of it, one final chance to turn back on your decision. You pulled on the handle, and the hatch swung down so quickly you thought that would have all spilled onto the floor. (you’d have to run away then, probably move to Canada or some other far away place so he wouldn’t kill you). The contents, however, stayed tucked into the nook and you reached forward to root through the contents. There were a few developed pictures, one of Max and The Party sleeping in the basement of the Wheelers house. There was one of a younger and much chubbier Billy smiling next to a woman, his mother you assumed (they were spitting images of one another) on a pier in California. There was another one of the same woman— now bald with skin almost clinging to the bones underneath— sitting in a hospital wheelchair as Billy (now filled out, but still soft around the edges) rode on the back of the chair, smiles wide over both of their faces as the breeze from the speed of the chair racing down the hall blew his hair back. There was another picture, of him and the basketball team after they won championships this year— Billy had a thick arm wrapped around Steve’s shoulders and Steve was laughing as the flash went off.

Underneath the stack of pictures, there were three large packets of Marlboro cigs laying still in their plastic, you laughed as you moved them aside, revealing a pack of hair ties, a pair of scissors and finally, a thick leather journal.

It looked like it had seen some hard days. The spine of the book was missing, having detached from the cloth underneath. The revealed spine had a handful of staples and duct tape holding it together— as if someone had offhandedly tried to fix it, not caring too much about how it looked. There was a cut on the back, slicing the leather in half and revealing the back page. You opened the book and flipped through the pages that had flowers, and leaves and grass taped to the pages. There were tiny words scrolled between the flower-frames Billy had made, complete with a title, and the date at the very top of the page. You flipped the pages slowly, not wanting to break any flower stems or lose any pictures he had taped on the back of the poems he had written. You flipped until you reached the last page he wrote on, because holy shit, there was a picture of you. It had been a cutout from the local newspaper, and it was from the Christmas Eve meal you had volunteered for, and Billy was beside you, smiling down at you as if he was the sun itself. The article was talking about the philanthropic demographic that was raising its head in Hawkins, and you had known that there would be a piece done about the Kitchen, but you had never expected to be the main article picture and you certainly didn’t expect your picture to be in Billy’s journal. On the adjacent page, there were some yellow wildflowers you had picked one day and given to Billy as he filled the car up with gas. You had tucked them into the mirror above his head and he had only commented about how they took away from his masculinity. You had told him to suck it up and enjoy them, as one's masculinity was fragile if he was put off by the sight of wildflowers.

Your fingers barely traced over the indentations his pen made, feeling the pressure of his hands, and feeling the way the pen tore through the page as if he was writing it down in a hurry. There was a poem there.

“I can see you running around your house, Your hair resembles something like a nest and you have a blush on your cheeks that makes your skin glow. And I wait. You tie your hair into a rubber band that I know you’ll complain that it's going to pull every strand of hair from your head as I drive you home. I will wait. You turn around now, one foot in your front door and you wave your hand back at me, the shadows from the front porch light casting shadows over your face that I want to memorize. I will always wait. I wait until I see your silhouette against your white curtains. I wait until the light goes out in your room. I wait until I can catch my breath, and I wait until my heart stops racing. And I’m still waiting.”

You felt as if the air had been knocked from your lungs. Your fingers had since grown cold, and you struggled to breathe for a hot second. It was as if the world around you had melted away, and the only thing in the world that existed were the flowers on the page and the words that he wrote. You noticed a movement from the corner of your eye, and your head whipped up to see Billy with a handful of coffee and muffins and bagels and yogurt.

You slammed the glovebox closed, and shoved the journal into the bag in your lap without thinking. He opened the driver's side door and you gave him a nervous smile. He was waiting. He was always waiting, and so were you and now that you had read the poem he had written about you, and you had forgotten how to even interact with another human being.

“Blonde caramel latte, and a cheese danish for the Princess. Oh, and I got a yogurt for you— it’s strawberry, but I wasn’t sure if you like strawberry yogurt, so if you don’t I will trade my vanilla.” He said, handing your the paper bags and putting the coffees in their cup holders. He didn’t even bother to hand yours to you as he had been reminded multiple times that you were afraid of burning your tongue— you only drank lukewarm coffee. It was a detail you hadn’t realized he had remembered or even noticed.

When you didn’t respond, he nudged your knee with his fist. “You okay?”

“I’m perfect.”

You had kept the journal. You knew it was bad, and you knew that Billy was probably losing his god damned mind about not having it in his glovebox. You knew he wouldn’t talk to you about it, and you knew he wouldn’t come over until the following Saturday morning because you still weren’t friends. You were volunteer buddies, and holy shit you’ve stolen Billy Hargrove’s poetry journal and there was a poem written about you in it and you were pretty sure it was literally burning a hole through your side table.

It was Sunday night when you took it out the first time. It looked innocent enough, its stapled spine pressing into your palm and the weight of it not enough to make your hand sink. The crinkle of the stale pages echoed around your room, and you almost wanted to shove it back into your drawer like it was something dirty you needed to hide. You placed it at the bottom of your bed, and you sat for some time curled up at the head of it, staring at it like it was a severed hand.

It was one in the morning when you finally reached for it, flipping through the pages to a new one— the page after the poem where he said he would wait. You taped a few scraps of lace you had found in your mother's sewing kit, and secured it with some hot glue you had found in your old craft drawer. The white lace bordered the middle of the page and you picked up your favorite (it was lucky) purple pen and began writing. You didn’t know what you were writing until it was finished, and when you tried to re-read it, the words didn’t sink in until you forced yourself to read them out loud.

“The universe took its time on you Crafted you precisely, so you could offer the world Something distinct from everyone else. So when you doubt how you were created You doubt an energy greater than us both [Do not doubt that energy It’s one smart mother fucker].”

You left school the next day early. You ignored the look your teacher gave you as you stood up in the middle of class, and you ignored the way Billy watched you leave. You ignored the way his expression shifted from boredom to interest, then from interest to worry when you didn’t look back. You pushed your shoulders back and walked out of the class and down the hall. You walked out of the school and into the parking lot and stopped in front of the iconic Blue Camaro.

You thanked whatever God was out there when you tried to open the front door and it opened without the alarm blaring. You placed the journal on the seat and you let out a frightened squeal when a polished hand smacked the top of the roof.

Carol.

“What do you think you’re doing?”

“Returning something that doesn’t belong to me.”

“Mmhmm.”

“To you happen to have any nice perfume?” She responded to you by digging through her bag and handing you an old bottle of something. You opened the book to your lace page and spritzed the perfume across the page.

“Okay, so do you like him back or somethin’?”

“That’s none of your business.”

“Alright then.”

You left school after that, choosing to walk home and enjoy the chill in the wind that reminded you it was not quite spring, but the promise of something warm around the corner was on its way. You didn’t live too far from the high school, so you knew your walk would be short. You took your time today, however. You pondered if this was about to change the last three months of your high school life— or even how it wasn’t. You kicked a rock on your way home, even stopping to kick it between your feet as if it were a soccer ball. You were stopped when you heard a familiar rumble ignite in the distance, followed shortly by a silence, and then a sound that resembled the of a Nascar tearing down a dirt pathway. Billy.

You picked up the pace, suddenly afraid of the consequences you had brought upon yourself and just as you turned the corner to your tiny cookie-cutter cul-de-sac Billy’s car pulled over in front of you, almost knocking you out by the knees. You didn’t know what Billy’s intentions were when he stormed around the car, a pin on his jacket catching the rays of the sun and glinting in your face. He didn’t slow down when he got closer, and he forced you to take a few quick steps back for fear of him bowling you over.

You were pleasantly surprised when his hands wrapped around the back of your neck and pulled you to him. He pressed his lips hungrily to yours and they danced messily with yours. He grasped at your face, head, and neck desperately trying to get you closer to him as if he wanted to drink you in. When his arm wrapped around your waist to pull your torso closer to his, you let out a surprised gasp which allowed his tongue to snake into your mouth and lick the back of your teeth, only wanting to finally get the chance to taste you. And boy, did you not disappoint. To Billy, you tasted of mint gum, and coffee and warmth— and he knew that you needed air but there was no way he ever wanted to pull away from you.

You pressed your hand against his shoulder, pushing him away just enough so you could breathe. You gasped for air when his lips popped away from your swollen ones, and you looked up to his face. His cheeks were redder than usual, his lips were swollen from the hard kiss he had given you seconds before and were glistening in the golden sun from spit. His pupils were large, making the blue of his eyes stand out more in a thinner circle. His ears were red as well, from nervousness, or attraction, or adrenaline and his hair was mussed from your hands. His shaking breathe hit your face, and he leaned in once more to press his lips gently to yours, pressing you onto the car behind you and cradling your face softly his rough hands. Your lips danced together, barely touching but enough to take both of your breaths away. You let your hands drift— from his waist to his chest, over his shoulders where you cupped his neck briefly. They then drifted to his sticky-outy ears where they traced the shell of them briefly before your arms wrapped around his shoulders in one of the softest hugs had ever felt.

Before you, his glovebox was where he kept his most important items. Where he kept his addiction, where he kept his thoughts and his heart.

You were his new glovebox.

[runephoenix6769]

Willow Schnee theory

Ok, this is something that I havent seen discussed much, if at all and I really think it needs to be addressed. 

Willow Schnee. 

We now know, due to the very cute Freezerburn heart to heart..  that she is a heart broken shell of a woman, who has, like her children, suffered at the hands of Jacques.  Alcohol became her refuge and her daughters have suffered for it. 

But lets dial that all back for a sec. 

In ‘Lessons Learned’ , Winter tells Weiss, 

“We Schnee’s are unique. Unlike many, our Semblance is hereditary.”

( It has been suggested by some members of the FNDM that due to Whitley’s slightly jealous over tones towards Weiss and hatred of Winter... Plus his view’s of Huntsman as barbarians. that maybe he doesn't have this ability. Leading some people to suggest that maybe the semblance only passes down the female line...... The jury is out on this.. Guess we’ll have to wait for RT to confirm.. Any way, I digress)

So if the Semblance is hereditary that means that Willow has this ability too, making her story all the more upsetting. 

No doubt she learned how to use it, and no doubt she was rather skilled, Im thinking she taught her eldest daughter before the confirmation of Jacques motivations crushed her... 

This revelation knocked the fight right out of her.

Why didn't she rage? Why didn't she fight? Why didn't she get angry? 

We’ve met the Schnee women and jesus fxxing christ when they set their mind to something they are formidable. The Schnee women have an unbridled temper  under a very frosty veneer.  

Why didn't she stand for her children and tell Jacques to knock it the fuck off?

She’s had training, shes got a kick ass semblance. She could just swat him to one side, ‘swish, flick. splat!. 

But think about it. 

A care free young woman, Beautiful, educated, From one of the wealthiest families in the whole of Remnant, she’s royalty.  Im seeing her wild and happy, her Father’s pride and joy/ She has many suitors, but one in-particular is slightly older, dashing , charming. speaks to her in a way that no one else ever has. He shows her things she never seen. He is intelligent, understands her Father’s business. The pressure of being the heir to the Schnee Dust Company is a heavy burden, a company she shall one day run, she’s slightly insecure that she wont be able to live up to her father’s legacy. but this man assures her, she shall. besides, if they get married, he will be there to help her. 

Her Father likes him, her mother does not, her grandmother says Willow could trust a Vacuoan Faunus vagabond more than she can trust him. Willow brushes it off as snobbery. 

He suggests marriage. Her Mother disapproves.. Her Father is wary..She assures him, this is the man she loves, she wants no other... 

How can a Father deny his only child? 

He reluctantly agrees....  Assurances are made, he agrees to give up his name. 

The first few years are blissful, they are learning the ropes at her Fathers side. Her husband is eager to start a family... Willow falls pregnant... Her husband is so tender, caring. Suggests she takes it easy, theres no need for her to come to the office, he’ll deal with everything..

 Dont worry or stress out the baby. 

She gives birth to a beautiful baby girl, keeping the W tradition, she names her Winter..  Her husband lavishes gifts on his daughter but the affection isnt quite there. He explains its the office and hes tired. Her grandparents dote on her.. Catering to Winters every whim..

As the years pass, she loses her mother.. Her father is over come with grief, he isnt as strong as he used to be... Her  husband graciously offers to step up to the plate, carry the load... In her stead, of course...  Just whilst her Father gets back on his feet... 

He never does.. 

The only light in his life is Winter, who he begins to train , mock wooden swords... Chasing her through the cavernous halls.. Her delighted squeals of joy echoing through the house...  Willow trains her a bit more seriously, encouraging ballet, gymnastics, and horse riding to help with her foot work and balance.. at her husbands request 

Her Father gently chides her, “Allow her to be a child”

Willow takes to caring for him and he is over joyed when he hears shes expecting a second child. 

Whilst her movement is limited, she begins to teach Winter the fundamentals of glyph usage and explains the Schnee semblance

She is so grateful to her husband, for being such a good man, understanding that her Father needs her, for taking care of the business. 

Everyone is over joyed at the arrival of Weiss, a middle name belonging to your mother. She is small and frail but alert. This time, he is much more receptive, he is much more affectionate with the new arrival

And business is booming. She hears silly rumours on the social circuit but dismisses them as idle gossip among elitist assholes. The upper echelons of society had never quite accepted him as one of their own. Jealousy at his success when other company's were slipping. 

Her Father’s mind begins to deteriorate until he is the shadow of a man. 

When he passes, Willow is at a loss..... 

She notices small differences. Her husbands long hours at the office, hes cold, distant.. distracted. He rarely sees his daughters, he loses his temper easily.. 

The first time winter messes up a recital, he snaps, Winter cries.. He apologies n claims its stress.. 

He continues to favour little Weiss over her sister, instead he begins, pushing Winter in all her training, her academics.. Willow confronts him... 

He says he wants what is best for her... that maybe its her Mother who isnt good enough to train her.. He hires Winter the best sword master in the land n demands progress reports. 

What has happened to the man she loved, what has she done wrong, maybe another baby might bring them closer... 

When Whitley is born, her husband is ecstatic.... A son! A son he spoils and lavishes with praise.. 

He almost immediately forgets Weiss..

 Willow can see the seething sibling rivalry brewing, vying for his attention,  the jealousy. The competitiveness between the girls. Which her husband encourages, claiming it is healthy for them. 

They are Schnee’s after all with an image an image to up hold. 

They should be the best at everything they do. 

The rumours about the company become too dark to ignore, the collapsed mines, the trapped faunus.. The threat of the White Fang.. 

Suddenly your home is your prison.. Security ramped up... She always had security but not like this, Board Members go missing.. Family and friends murdered. 

Her husband treats you with barely concealed contempt , She asks if the marriage is over.. He sneers

She decides something needs to be done.. She sweeps into the head quarters.. She goes through the files... She is disgusted.. 

Who is this man and what has he done to her husband

She brings it up at the dinner table, she wants the company to reverse its policies.

He laughs at her.

Willow, “I am the head of the SDC.”

He informs her that she is only a figure head... The company is his.. Sure she can leave with her money n the schnee family homes, jet property n what ever, but the company is his.. He threatens to write the children out of company.. 

She asks him... “ Did you ever love me?”

He looks at her with a stare as cold as an Atleasian winter..

“No. I only married you for the company”

In that moment she realises that she has been played.. the longest con.. Her mother and grand mother were right... 

It all begins to dawn on her..

Willow no longer has anyone to turn to... Any board member she was close to has conveniently disappeared or died. 

she meant nothing.... It was all an elaborate charade.

She was a means to an end.

He is a repulsive monster!!

And now her children’s futures are at stake.. 

Her children... HIS children.. 

Winter looks stricken. Weiss bottom lip is trembling.. 

The candles on her birthday cake flicker and die

Willow has never noticed how much of him is in them... The set to Winter’s shoulders. The way Weiss scowls at a particularly difficult problem.... 

And Whitley....... So much like his Father.. 

Feel free to comment, or add to.. or share.. Or if you think I’m way off base, let me know... 

Im genuinely intrigued by Willow Schnee and her kids.. The dynamic.. 

Im up for listening to anyone else’s theories or if anyone else has any ideas. 

[fearofaherobrine]

Roleplay Server Log #286

“Shifting Update, Stuck Gem”

[Notch] On the phone- so what's in the new snaphot?

[Dofta] Not much, this one is mostly bug fixes, stuff with the cameras, there's a new stock sound if you're drowning, some new noises for the noteblocks, you know the drill.

[Doc] I'm setting it up now...

[Ashe] Comes outside- Mama!  I finished my book!

[Alan] -Comes running up, wings flapping rapidly to boost them along. They skid around Notch and duck down low, peeking between Notch's legs to make sure they're not being followed.-  -Turns head to look at Ashe as they come out too-

-There's a sudden flicker in the world itself and then a sparking noise before it snaps back. -

[Doc] Um....

[TLOT] over chat - WHAT THE FUCK?!

[Ashe] Trips and falls face first, breaking his glasses as he turns into his human form-

[Endrea] Because of where she is, she falls off the roof as she's suddenly in her human form

[Yaunfen] Makes a surprised noise as they turn human too, scaring the barn cats at the sudden transformation-

-Very loud angry cat noises from inside of Lie's room-

[Doc] Looks around in confusion-

[TLOT] FIX WHATEVER YOU JUST DID. STEVE TURNED INTO A RAPTOR AND HE'S CRYING!!!!

[Deer] - Ummm, I'm a bit stuck...  Why did I just suddenly change?

[CP] Comes barreling out of the bedroom and into one of the windows of the bridge, launching fireballs at Doc-

[Gk] Rushes out of the house in his plain Herobrine shape- What the actual fuck is going on?!

[Flowey] -in chat- What just happened??

[Firebird] -in chat- ????????????

[Doc] Looks around in a panic-

[Gem] -in chat- can I have some help I am suck in my hall way I turned into my dragon form out of nowhere

[Lie] Comes out and puts a paw on CP's head, also in feline form-

[Doc] Grabs the block and bolts to avoid the fireballs-

[Notch] Uh.... Dofta, I'll call you back-

[CP] Chases after Doc-

[Alan] -Panicked squeak and scuttle a bit away from Notch and Doc, accidentally bumping into the downed Ashe-

[Doc] Is trying to protect the computer-

[Ashe] - Oh, um...  Hello...

[Endrea] Grumbles as she stands up- Ashe?  Are you alright?

[Notch] Is checking on the children-

[Ashe] - I broke my goggles again...

[CP] Many angry cat noises-

[Yaunfen] Runs back towards the front of the house- Mada what's happening?

[Doc] Has the block in hir mouth and is practically dacing to avoid the fire balls-

[Notch] Goes to Yaunfen- Some kind of update glitch-

[Willow] -comes outside as a human- why are human only now?

[TLOT] Is in his huge golden cat form and barrels into Doc- FIX HIM NOW!

[Alan] -Scrunches up on the ground by Ashe, shaking. They're overstimulated by all the confusion-

[Doc] Is knocked over and rolls a bit-

[Oak] -is behind Willow-

[Endrea] - I'm not certain Willow, are the two of you okay?- She heads for Alan to check on him as well

[Notch] Calls to Doc- I have Yaunfen! Just go!

[oak] i'm okay

[willow] so am I

[Doc] Runs in the direction of the spawn -

[Alan] -Sniffle, shake-

[Gk] Looks extremely angry

[Endrea] Spreads one of her wings around Alan- Shhhh, it's alright little one.  Ashe, could you use your echolocation for now?

[Ashe] - Yes mama

[TLOT] Runs after them-

[Gem] -in chat- could I request a tp from anyone in a place I won't get stuck in again?

[Lie]  In chat- That might be awhile, everyone seems to have been forcefully changed...

[Gem] -in chat- at least this is better then the excess heat that happened

[Alan] -Sniffles and scoots against Endrea's wing-

[Endrea] Gently picks Alan up and holds him close- There we go, it's alright

[Alan] -Sniffle-

[Ashe] Makes his way to Willow and Oak- Are you sure you two are okay?

[Willow] yes I will be fine I could even go on adventure -starts to run around-

[Oak] I will be good thank you big brother, will you be okay?

[Ashe] Squints- I should be...  And no Willow, we should stay here, we're not as strong in these forms

[Alan] 'M Scared... Why is everyone yelling and angry?

[Willow] adventure -runs off to the swings under the bridge and gets on one-

[Endrea] - It's alright, something unexpected happened, that's all

[Alan] Oh...

[Endrea] - Now then, what are you doing away from your guardian?

[Alan] Ran! Wanted to explore! Felt good enough but then all the yelling and angry.... -Snuffles and curls up again-

[Endrea] That's alright, not all explorations are fun.  And sometimes things happen

[Alan] Really?

[Endrea] - But many adventures can be fun, especially if you have friends with you

[Deer] Huffs and awkwardly moves around the playroom.  She's never been in there in her dragon form before and so keeps banging into the wall-

[Steve] is curled up in his and TLOTs room, which shares a wall with the tunnel leading down to where Deerheart is. He stops snuffling and listens intently

[Deer] Trips and bangs her chin on the ground- Owww...

[Steve] sniffs around curiously and catches a whiff of her. He lets out a questioning bark

[Deer] Lifts her head at the unfamiliar noise- Hello?

[Steve] scratches furiously at the wall where the sound is coming from

[Deer] Hears the scratching- Hang on, I'm pretty big, let me try- She scratches away at the walls, pulling out hunks as she goes

[Steve] Starts kicking at the wall and the blocks pop away to reveal a natural cavern. He hops down and the sound seems to be coming from the floor. He lets out another raspy bark

[Deer] Keeps clawing and eventually makes a small hole and looks through-

[Steve] jumps a little but then let's out a soft coo. His snout is streaked with tears

[Deer] - Steve?

[Steve] Sad nod. He starts scratching and kicking at the rocks again

[Deer] Makes the hole large enough for Steve and holds her foot up- Here, come on through

[Steve] Shakes his head no. He's trying to make the hole big enough for her to get out into the tunnel. His kicks are as strong as his normal punches

[Deer] - Oh, are you trying to help me out?

[Steve] Strong nod yes. - keeps kicking. She can almost climb out

[Deer] Pulls away a bit more stone as well until she can shimmy through.  She moves carefully so as not to hurt Steve with her much bigger body-

[Steve] sad hug around her leg. His bitty green scales are a bit cold

[Deer] - Oh Steve, I'm sorry.  I don't know what caused this

[Steve] Air sniff and low growl

-There's a bit of a moan from a nearby shadow and a pair of zombies trundle into view-

[Steve] Darn towards them without hesitation and viciously kicks them until they despawn

[Deer] - Well at least you're in an agile form, there's not much I can do in here when I'm this big

[Steve] Points too his mouth and makes a sad noise-

[Deer] Thinks for a moment- Is...  is this the form that you hurt TLOT in?

[Steve] Wilts visible and shakes his head, yes.

[Deer] Draws Steve closer to herself- It's alright Steve, we all know it was an accident.  You don't have to feel so guilty anymore

[Steve] Sad cheeping noise-

[Deer] Snuggles Steve close against her body- It's okay

[Steve] Sniffs a bit and then his head pops up and snaps around-

-Theres a creeper trundling straight for them-

[Deer] Swats it with her tail-

[Steve] Yip. - He tugs on her a little bit-

[Deer] - Yeah, maybe we should keep moving

[Steve] Nods and heads towards the end of the tunnel that curves up. He's leaping nimbly to take out high blocks so she can squeeze through.

[Deer] Wiggles into the passage after Steve

[Doc] Hits the bare ground where the spawn is and leaps into the air-

[TLOT] Jumps after hir and takes a mouthful of hir tail fluff-

[Doc] OW! - Xe climbs the air and quickly vanishes into the clouds.

[TLOT] Thumps back down and spits out the hair.

[CP] Is hissing and angry, launching a few fireballs after Doc's retreating form-

[TLOT] Lets out an angry yowl of his own and looks at Cp.

[CP] Fur is poofed in anger and speaks mentally to TLOT- The fuck happened?  I know Lie didn't use the collar on me

[TLOT] I don't know! Steve and I just instantly shifted, and now we can't change back!

[CP] - Well fuck...  I think I saw the dragons in their human forms as well...

[TLOT] Ears flatten - Then it might be everybody... including Doc... Oh shit...

[CP] - What?

[TLOT] Gem is huge as a dragon and so is Deerheart... I hope they were outside.

[CP] - Not my problem- Turns around and starts heading back

[TLOT] Ears twitch as his anger fades and his senses re-open.  He feels Steve shift from sadness to fighting mode, and he dashes off to find him-

[CP] Returns home and finds Lie curled up with Notch getting head scratches while purring-

[Notch] I saw them fly.... Doc can't fix anything if everyone is trying to murder hir you know?

[CP] Hisses-

[Lie] - CP calm down

[Alexis] Over chat- Hey Notch?  Is Stevie with you?  He went out mining yesterday and I haven't heard anything from him since

[Notch] Freezes - Stevie... Alexis, I haven't seen him. Do you know where he was digging?

[Alexis] - There's a cave system farther down the coast.  He marked the outside with a brown banner

[Notch] In chat-  I'll go look. - out loud- Guys.... Stevie has two other forms. He might be in trouble.

[Yaunfen] - Adventure?

[Notch] Not this time kiddo. I know this isn't the shape you're strong in. You stay here with Endrea. Then you can play with Ashe, Willow, Oak and Alan too.

[Yaunfen] - Okay- He heads into the house to join the other dragons

[Lie] Stretches- I'll stay here with Flux

[CP] Starts trying to follow Lie-

[Notch] No. You I need. Come on Cp- Picks him up-

[CP] Angry grumbles-

[Notch] Pulls out an iron sword. - Your brother is in trouble. I might need your fireballs.

[CP] Mentally- Fine

[Notch] Thank you. - Hurries to find the cave-

-The cave has the banner as promised, and Notch follows the torches down inside-

[Notch] Stevie?

[CP] Sniffs the sir and squirms a little-

[Notch] This is bad... But the real question is; is he a child again? Or a cat?

[CP] - Can't tell, the smell is adult here

[Notch] Reaches the end of the torches and calls out again- STEVIE? WHERE ARE YOU?

[CP] Squirms out of Notch's arms and starts sniffing around- There's a scent change here

[Notch] What does it smell like?!

[CP] - Small, the trail is narrower

[Notch] Shit.... can you follow it?

[CP] - Yeah yeah- Sniffs along as the trail leads farther from the light

[Notch] Keeps calling out for Stevie, He sounds a little frantic-

[Stevie] Quietly- Father?

[Notch] Stevie? Stevie! We came to find you! Are you hurt?!

[Stevie] - Father!  Up here!

[Notch] Looks up. - Oh Stevie! I'll get you down! Just stay still. - He uses some random blocks from his inventory to make a short stair and reaches for Stevie-

[Stevie] Is huddled as far back as he can get on a little ledge, he's once again a child and he looks terrified, but he quickly moves towards Notch- Father!

[Notch] Thank goodness. - He holds Stevie to himself- Let's get out of here. Your brother came for you too. - Looks down at Cp-

[CP] Grumbles and flicks tail a little-

[Notch] He puts away the sword and reaches down to get Cp before putting the cat on the opposite shoulder- Lets get out of here.

[CP] Just lays there-

[Stevie] Sniffles- Father, what happened?

[Notch] I think Doc got a buggy version of the update. Everyone with a second form was suddenly switched to it.

[Stevie] - Second form?  But I'm always like this!

[Notch] Oh dear... Actually, no you're not. You're usually an adult. You have a girlfriend and your own house.

[Stevie] - No I don't!  You're being silly father

[Notch] in chat- Alexis? We found Stevie... he's been turned into a child again....

[Alexis] Much cursing-

[Notch] Heads back to Lie's house. Still in chat- I'm taking him back to my house for now. Hopefully this will get fixed quickly.

[Lie] Is up on Notch's table eating a pork chop when she see's them approaching- Oh dear...

[Notch] Opens the door with a sigh and sets Stevie down - Well at least he's not a cat too. He's not as used to that shape.

[Stevie] Looks around- Father I'm hungry

[Flux] - Oh my, are we babysitting again?

[Notch] It looks like it. Cp can't take care of him like this anyway- gives the cats ears a gentle rub. - He fiddles around in a trunk and offers Stevie an apple, some bread and a cooked steak.

[Stevie] - Thank you!- He takes it to the table and climbs up into a chair and starts eating

[CP] Tiny hiss-

[Notch] Sits down as well and leans his elbows on the table- You want some food too Cp?

[CP] Climbs down and just starts sharing Lie's food-

[Notch] -sigh-

[Gem] -in chat- I need still need some kind of help I can't even get out of the hallway

[BEN] Stuck in his adult form- I think you might just be stuck there

[Hyrule] Happily eating some applesauce-

[Aven] well i'm not complaining about your adult form

[BEN] Quick smirk at Aven-

[Aven] well we have no one to watch Hyrule for that

[BEN] - He's old enough

[Hyrule] Immediately tries sticking something not food into his mouth-

[Aven] -takes it away from Hyrule and has sarcasm dripping from her voice- yea totally old enough.

[BEN] - What?

[Aven] he isn't

[BEN] - Well we can't really do anything until Gem moves

[Aven] yea well she can't move she is stuck

[BEN] - So what?  Should we just bomb the side of the house to get her out?

[aven] gem will get pissy because that would need to be a lot of damage to get her out

[BEN] - Well do you have any other idea's?

[Aven] nope

[BEN] - Gem, we're gonna blow up the house

[gem] no because i'm the one who is going to have to fix it and I can't fix it like this

[BEN] - I don't think we have a choice

[Gem] a giant hole in the house isn't safe for the kids

[BEN] - Neither is letting a kid run around through temples and dungeons and fighting demon kings but we turned out fine

[Gem] -if they could see her eye or if she had pupils they would be able to tell she is rolling her eyes- well we are on the second floor it's not really the safest.

[aven] get over it we are doing it we will make sure they don't fall i'll even put fences up

[BEN] - I'll go get the bombs

[Gem] -is grumbling but makes no further statement-

[BEN] Scrounges up his bomb arrows- Think these will work best?

[Aven] just try to make it as precise of a hole as you can

[BEN] - Yeah yeah- He heads outside and floats so he's level where Gem is- Let me know when you and Hyrule are a good distance away

[Aven] -makes sure her and hyrule are on the bed which is as far as they can be with out being outside- ready

[BEN] Begins shooting, quickly blowing up portions of the house-

[Gem] -squeezes out of the hole and falls to the ground- yep now that happen

[BEN] - You know, the house could probably use more windows...

[Gem] I made it when I was just arriving so I was worried that some how me being allergic to the sun would come back which it didn't there where marks for windows I could add at any time.

[aven] -adds the fences till gem can fix the wall-

[BEN] Flies over and picks up Hyrule- Yeah, well now you have a chance to add bigger windows

[Hyrule] - Dada!  Fly now!

[Gem] -lays on the path- I will add the normal windows I had planed out to long and the planters you blew up will look weird

[BEN] - Who says you need planters or can't just make those longer too?

[Gem] the planters look weird if they are too long and I say I do need them because I like the planters

[BEN] - Fine, whatever

[aven] just let her do what she want with this house  because after all she did build it and this part of the house is hers

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

There is way too much killing on TV

Okay so you may shoot people with an unloaded gun

If you are a clone the clone you shoot with an unloaded gun will molt like a bird.

If you are not a clone the clone you shoot with an unloaded gun will explode into sand and dust. Which you then shoot again and it will get sucked up into the gun.

If you are not a clone and you have the unloaded gun set in the locked or midway between locked and unlocked position and you shoot an evil person with the same unloaded gun they will explode into a cloud of sand and disappear.

Stabbing people makes a mess.

So i don't understand why y'all are out doing shit when already I said theres a missle launcher from North Korea that is designed by me that does the same thing and is on auto lock to constantly sweep the entire world except for designated areas that are unknown to you and New Mexico.

If you have a problem and think someone should be dead, call an airport and request a Chinook Shadow Shot. It will do the same thing as an unloaded gun.

The missle launcher uses super sonic waves. Which are healthy and you can feel a slight shimmer, shake or tremor that lasts about 15 seconds to a minute depending on the caverns or amount of bunkers in your area.

When you kill people then it requires a shit ton of extra work and punishment for you. It means we have to manually go in and heal the people, double check they are not evil or clones then arrest you and put you in jail, check if you are dumb or a clone or evil.

The auto heal missle sweep for the dead is not scheduled until a Valentine's homecoming. So you're out killing people now. Well they're gonna bloat and explode from the gas in their intestines and look like gremlins hatching because you fed Gizmo after midnight. And require a hazmat team to clean.

Peru had a massive mess because of GPS implants in the Iraq human trafficking victims and so for days people have been healing body after body after body.

Because some were clones and the healing missle will not shoot and heal clones. It has a lock. Since the clones were killed by clones the bodies were molting. And it could be seen why there was a block on the healing missle.

So people missed Christmas So that other people could be home for Christmas. They only finished 9 hours ago and they still have more refrigerated FreightLiners (18 wheelers/Mack trucks) full of dead people stacked on top of one another. I told them to stop. We would use the missiles because its way too much for all that. Hundreds of people were working day and night to heal over 2 million people. Because 2 someones using 2 planes to indicate they were from Iraq bombed them.

And they bombed China. Killing 9 million with 2 planes. That have not been healed and their bodies were not preserved. And so they will be healed with a different shot that's called the Zombie Shot on January 1st that is shot to a satellite then bounces back down and covers a particular area of the Earth in one shot to bring them back to life. The satellite has been mirrored to alter the original plans to also include China.

As for the original; Its called the International Date Line which then will begin a scan that cannot be blocked until Valentine's Day that only revives good people that have died.

People know to be at the Date Line on New Years for the shot and we know some won't bother about it. So they don't have to. We will get them later. Most will but some have like fears to leave loved ones or their favorite places so we promise to get to them and they can remain where they are happy.

It will also revive dead pets that were not reincarnated people previously and just animals. And those will revive in the homes of the previous owner. Like our dog George was Chris' and so while he was a family pet, he was most loved by Chris and that is who he will return to.

I had a beloved white kitten that was murdered by a Tom Clone and so he won't return to me like he was but as a white panther with blue eyes, instead. He used to follow me to school. Drove me nuts but i loved him to death.

But the point is y'all should not be killing people. I am in a house with 2 rapists and they're both still alive

So no one can claim I said to stab or shoot any one with a bullet or drop a bomb.

I'm not doing it so no one has permission to do it either.

And people are making shit up about North Korea so you can shove a dildo down your throat. Yes the USA IS flying over North Korea and Yes we will continue to and Yes we will kill any one that is a threat to North Korea. We are protecting North Korea. So the lies about North Korea and us having some war are in fact lies. So cut the fucking bull shit. You're gonna get some ass hole out there thinking he knows how to handle it and you're gonna end up getting them killed or worse North Korea and us hurt. We are friends with North Korea. I don't understand why that is difficult to understand.

How many times have I said North Korea and how many times have I said Kim Jong-Un with affection? Too many for stupid ass reports to exist about us having issues with North Korea.

North Korea is doing more to save the planet than any other country combined. Because I gave THEM the tools to save the planet because that was the country that i chose based upon my work with the USSR.

So y'all can fuck yourselves with your fucking lies because I'm way beyond pissed about them.

The Pentagon and 23andme is also a lie.

And so y'all need to cut the bull shit.

No lying and no killing.

Its not creating. Habitable Earth.

Would you like me to stab you to death, heal you. Stab you to death. Heal you. Stab you to death, Heal you? Because I can.

Would you like me to lie to you, pretend i care about you. Lie to you, pretend I'm trustworthy. Lie to you, make you think that you're dumb. Lie to you, prove you're dumb. Lie to you, prove I'm your leader. Lie to you, prove youre dumb. Lie to you, prove you're dumb. Because I can.

So watch what the fuck you're doing. Because it can happen to you.

If someone tells you to do something you don't agree with then say No.

Don't put words in my mouth. Tell them you will ask me. Don't say what you think i will say or what you want me to say. Ask me. I will fucking say what i will say.

You can say what I have said but only exactly what i have said and not your interpretation of what i have said but an exact quote of what I have said

You can say your opinion/feelings of what i have said

But this "Sabrina said to bomb Peru and China and to stab people and North Korea says we are bugging them and are gonna kick our asses" is shit i never fucking said and i will punch your fucking teeth down your throat.

There is enough honest confusion and I know sometimes i don't write clearly enough. Which is why i say you must say only exactly what I say when you want to say i said something. Screen shot it and read it exactly.

Because I'm not responsible for stupid ass bull shit you fucking idiots want to do using my fucking name. But i will clean it up, find you and make you regret ever fucking doing it.

Use your own goddamed name. Don't blame me for all your decisions.

I'll slap your fucking jaw off your dammed face.

Everyone else that is honest and kind. I am sorry the world isn't perfect yet. We will get it.

Peru. China. I am deeply sorry for your bombing. I understand you both made different choices according to your customs and both are fine and we will help you.

Those still missing loved ones, I am also sorry.

Those that are sick and in pain I am understanding that and we will eventually get around to healing all that shit by the 4th of July.

Meanwhile take baths to hydrate your bodies cause you know you don't drink enough water and severe degenerative back diseases like mine do absorb water into the spine to reduce pain. You don't need volcanic waters to heal. Just to grow limbs and penis.

Also take vitamins.

Low Vitamin D and B will cause pain.

Grow up. I did.

[pcrfide]

✉️

✉️ Send for an unmailed letter from my muse

The paper is ragged, torn from the back of an old dictionary it looks like. It’s bone colored, ivory going south towards the yellow of old age. Ink smudges here and there, ballpoint- nothing so fancy like a fountain pen or suchlike. Just pressure points where the paper’s nearly torn, divots and valleys pressed into the paper with uncertainty and too much emotion.

The grammar, however- leaves much to be desired, as if the writer decided to throw out the stops once the words started flowing.

Or perhaps, couldn’t keep them contained. 

-------------------------------------------------------

I haven’t written a letter since elementary. Hand written at least. I remember when the papers were lined, blue and white. Then they handed us tablets and told us how to type, and it was easier to get words out that way. Theres an honesty in this, though. like valium or morphine that makes your fingers cramp and everything just start coming out. 

i dont know if that makes sense, or if anything does anymore. i dont know if i even make sense, but im trying. i saw you yesterday, standing there while shouting at the recruits. you were tall and strong and it made my heart twist in the best and worst of ways. god i miss you. i miss the way you used to scream at me to get my head out of my ass because the thought of being without us together was impossible to think about. sleeping back to back in foxholes and trenches and bomb shelters was better than hiltons and featherbeds alone.

i could write a fucking book of poetry in the way you hated me then, but the way you hate me now makes me want to cease to exist. i miss the insults and the fucking snide commentary, because i knew behind it was you. reading you was hard, but it was possible. and it was a gift i fucking wish i had cherished more.

and now? now i don’t know. now i see you everywhere and nowhere. i see you in the hallways on the way to the office, in the shadows in the corners of my eyes. but you’re not there, not really. you’re not in the bed, or at my back and i’m not at your’s

and it’s killing me by inches. 

we won’t talk about this, about how it’s killing you. the hollowness of your cheeks and the red rims around your eyes. about how you turn your back when i start a conversation. about how the distance between us is greater than it’s ever been. I feel like even though we can’t fix this, we could at least figure out something to work around

bridge something.

i don’t know, man. i never thought i would need someone as badly as you until you weren’t there anymore. 

and that scares me.

and i think it’ll keep scaring me for a long time. 

tomorrow, i’m gonna come find you. i wanna at least talk like we used to, back when we’d hit the mat together. maybe share a drink or some shit. tomorrow i wanna try again.

tomorrow i—

---------------------------------------------------------------

The paper curls in and on itself, blackened into brown leaves as the fire consumes. Tired blue eyes watch as sheaf after sheaf is fed, pulled from an old security box hidden away in a small nondescript bank in Indiana. Words that’ll never make it past this fire, this time. Words that never made it past his lips, his pencil.

Grey smoke that twists and winds in and around itself in tired arabesques, mingling with the vines that dangle from the cigarette on his lips. The words crackle and pop as they become embers, and then ash- and the nothing at all.

Flakes that dance on the wind, and disappear out the cavern’s opening into the night air. 

Leaving behind nothing more than the memories they once were.

[ceescedasticity]

0k: THEMES