#it is monday morning for me

[skyrim-forever]

Creampies in Skyrim call that giving the sweet roll some icing

[books-books-smolderinglooks]

Love drunk and we're never sober.. If I die tonight then I'll die happily, with your hands on me.. 🧡💜

-Wrong by Omar Rudberg

[moveslikekeithrichards]

CAN we discuss how hard it is to make the call when your pets time is coming around .

[rocketbirdie]

thoughts on gay cloud strife?

too many, actually........

He strikes me as the kind of guy who would pretend to have a crush on a girl because that's what he's supposed to do, right? And he doesn't understand why people make such a big deal out of it. love songs, romance movies, steamy novels, apparently everybody else is feeling some kind of feeling that Cloud just........ doesn't have access to. But he plays along with it. it's what's expected of him. It's not like there's any other options, as far as he knows.

but he's not interested in girls and he knows it, he just doesn't see anything odd about his obsession with SOLDIER. With Sephiroth. With these strong, confident men in their sleeveless tops and baggy pants and badass combat boots.

And when he finally gets to meet a real SOLDIER for the first time (Zack in CC), it's almost comical how Love At First Sight the scene is. What with its tender emotional orchestral swells and glittering snow and pretty-smiling hair-swooshing face reveal. Suddenly Cloud's got the giggles and he's trying to act all cool. then they're hanging out every chance they get. Cloud's inviting Zack to his hometown to meet his mom. somehow neither of them realize what's happening.

and it's over before it can even begin.

By AC, there are so many people who love Cloud dearly— whose love he feels unable to reciprocate because he never got the opportunity to learn what love is. He doesn't know that love is supposed to be more than just a sense of obligation. The way he sees it, he got a tiny taste of it one time, and it ruined his life and took the life of someone that, in hindsight, he loved.

[felsicveins]

Do you think that julien and jd are going to get together again? Man i am clawing at your leg begging for them to have that happy ending.

Part of me feels julien genuinely loves and cares for jd, and that the guilt of what happened and the shame of what he did follows him like a lost dog. Hes never going to know what happiness feels like as long as he doesnt have his boy. And that eats at him. He feels pathetic for begging but at the same time what does he have left to lose? Dignity? He lost that the day john found out about the lip syncing. About everything.

John might be in a similar boat, having the guilt eating at him. He hates what julien did. But does he hate him himself? Fuck if he knows. All he does know is that the ache in his chest is a pain in the ass and that no matter what he cant go back to alcohol to subside it. So what can he go to? What can he do? He needs to be strong, to set his foot down. But even though he acts like he despises the guy, he still has that fucking wedding ring. He still has that ache. Sure there were others, but those were casual even in marriage. But this? This had a plan. A promise.

And that was broken. Years ago.

I wonder if they’ll ever fix it.

Nothing will get fixed if no one changes

[intotheelliwoods]

Hello tumblr fam anyone got something to help cheer me up?

[socialbutterfly19]

Anything but….

[hyperfocusthusly]

Motivation Monday

Tagged by @bidisasterevankinard 🧡🧡 so you can have a little bit from the second(?) chapter of Forget Me Not (first chapter here)

—-

“He makes me feel safe Bobby.

And when I woke up in that hospital, over a year of my life just, gone. I didn’t think I’d ever really feel safe again. That day, when we came home for the first time, he was going to leave. He was going to go and stay with Eddie, or Maddie, he wanted to give me space, not put any pressure on me-”

He dipped his head, chewed on his lip.

“And I- I didn’t know him, all I had was a long distance coworker who said we were together. You could have put 10 guys in a lineup and I wouldn’t have been able to pick him out, but when he said he was going to leave” his voice falters “I was terrified. Completely, inexplicably terrified by the idea of him leaving.”

—-

Tags list for this fic (let me know if you want to be added or removed 🫶🏻) also if you want to do your own MM, please do!

@leashybebes @sweaters-and-silly @sunnywithachanceofbi @mattdoestevan @mmso-notlikethat @harmonic-intervention

@cinderellarhea @buckcurls @theotherbuckley @wikiangela @apassingbird @mannafromtevan @actuallyitsellie @desert--moonchild

@casismybestfriend @crankypotionsmaster @powersuitup @disaster-j @hellion-child @kinkley-are-adorkable-flirts @evanbuckleymylove @drivebyanon @teabroomsandbooks @feistygina

@androidsaliensnwizards @bigfootsmom

[kaiserouo]

fuck weekly meeting

[clotpolesonly]

how truly devastated will Ronan be when he realizes that, when he dies as Ronan Lynch, whatever part of him is Greywaren will most likely go back to whatever other plane of reality it came from. nobody knows what that place is, really, but he does know it's not the kingdom of heaven. it's not where everyone he loves is going to be. no matter how good he is during life, in death he will be alone.

[montereybayaquarium]

😑 Mondays — am I right?

[noxious-fennec]

Happy (re)birthday to the most guy ever! I come bearing a humble gift :)

[graveyardcuddles]

There's this post I saw on here about how if the player turns Shadowheart over to the Sharans, the rest of the party should all turn on you. I completely agree, and I think they should also mutiny against Tav/Durge if they tell Orin to just go ahead and kill the party member she takes hostage. Act 3 feels like the act where everyone in the group should care about each other the most and yet it's the act where they arguably feel most disconnected from one another. And this is all probably a symptom of the overall lack of reactions and responses to major events in Act 3 from the companions in general.

But another similar example that drives me insane is how, if you ascend Astarion and then immediately turn on him and side with the Gur, ALL of the companions will just be like "Nice work taking out the trash, team. Job well done. Another vampire lord vanquished, " without so much as a hint of emotion after you betray him, gang up on him and KILL HIM?? As if they hadn't spent weeks and possibly months traveling with Astarion, getting to know him, bonding with him, ect. As if they hadn't just all stood there and let him complete the ritual. But the moment Paladin Karen and the Gur show up, they just abandon all that over what? Some vague ideal of "evil is evil black and white no nuace" nonsense? (which is even more ridiculous if some of the other companions are evil like DJ Shadowheart or Minthara).

The only companion with a reasonable reaction is Halsin, who correctly points out you should have tried harder to stop the ascension rather than betray Astarion and kill him after it happened. I understand that not all of the companions have the best relationship with him. And I understand all of them very much disapprove of him ascending. So I don't expect the whole party to mutiny over this particular decision. But the fact that they ALL uniformly turn on him so quickly for these people they don't even know is disappointing. There should have realistically been some pushback/objections. Or at least some guilt and sadness and reflection over the fact that they all just had to kill their former traveling companion/friend that THEY allowed to become this threat they felt warranted putting down.

It feels like it should be an incredibly tragic and cathartic moment, and it just falls spectacularly flat. I tried to rationalize their reactions as just part of the shitty lack of responses the companions all generally have in Act 3. But at least with Shadowheart and the hostage situation with Orin the companions will still be ANGRY at you and express their disaproval. Whereas here it really comes off like they just don't give a shit about Astarion and never really did. It's depressing.

I feel like it unintentionally and very sadly lends validation to the idea that what Astarion says about no one else being like Tav/Durge. No one else will look out for him. No one else will have that same kindness for him. No one has a heart like them. I don't actually agree with this notion. I think based on the good epilogue for his spawn ending he's definitely capable of making friends and genuine human connections. But Tav/Durge HAS to come first. They have to be the example that shows him how.

Also why I can't stop repeatedly romancing him. Astarion needs Tav/Durge arguably more than any other companion. He has nothing and no one else.

[babydovey]

Good morning Monday ☀️

[starrystevie]

"since when do you know how to use a gun?"

steve's standing in the bunker doorway with his arms crossed over his chest, hip balanced against the door frame. he's watching eddie meticulously clean what used to be a basic rifle that's turned into some monstrous thing hopper built with an additional barrel and multiple scopes. they just got back from a big fight that took a lot out of them all, so he's not surprised that eddie stays silent before clicking something into place. the sound of the metal echoes off the barren walls and he finally turns to look at steve.

"since i started hunting with dear old dad when i was 6."

he pulls off a scope, peers inside and frowns at something steve can't see before blowing against the glass lightly. there's a rag sitting next to him covered in some mix of blood, guts and grease and steve wouldn't be surprised if it isn't the first cloth he's had to use on that particular rifle. it's one of nancy's favorites, after all, and she's not known to clean up after every fight.

eddie looks good with a gun in his hand, steve thinks in some dark recess of his brain that ignores the part where he hates guns. he thinks about the part that loves the focus on eddie's face when he holds one instead, his jaw set in place. eddie looks older, they all do, but with scars dotting his face and wrapped around his neck and days old stubble covering his chin because they haven't had enough water for a shave, he looks mature.

there's a permanent scowl on his face that seems wrong, takes over where cheeky grins used to be. he misses the days where eddie's laugh was the only thing ringing in steve's ears, when his eyebrows weren't pinched in the middle, when he would play alongside the kids with wild expressions and jokes to match.

steve guesses coming back from the dead could do that to a guy.

"hey," he offers, a bit quiet and hard to hear over the clinking of the metal and the ambient sounds of the underground bunker they've lived in for months now. eddie's head stays dropped over the gun as he cleans but he gives a hum in response, so steve takes it as a go ahead. "i think i'm ready to take you up on that offer."

eddie snorts. he wipes some grease over a piece of the gun before setting it down on the table to grab something else steve couldn't name if he tried. "gotta be more specific, stevie boy."

"i want-" steve huffs and readjusts his stance to look more serious. he wants to bring eddie back, but that might be too hard to do in the apocalypse. "i want you to teach me how to shoot."

they spend their allotted 30 minutes above ground later that afternoon in the open space that used to be an old garden. there's trees surrounding them and cans sitting on an old cardboard box structure yards ahead of them. everything's tinted red from the upside down sky that bled into hawkins a year ago and never seemed to leave.

the only gun steve wanted was a handgun, a tiny thing that he can hide in the back of his waistband if he needed, backup for if he lost his bat in a fight. it's not that he wants to shoot, that can be left to nancy and hopper and apparently eddie now that he's healed up enough to fight. no, steve just wants a way to connect with eddie again. a way to bring a little glimmer of light back into his eyes that look more and more like the upside down darkness everyday.

"you need to hold it tighter, steve." eddie's next to him with an arm hovering under steve's elbow as he aims at the pepsi can in the middle of the stack. "it'll throw you back when you shoot, so you gotta be ready."

steve lets his fingers curl tighter around the gun, careful not to press down with his pointer finger that's over the trigger. he can hear eddie huff under his breath and then suddenly he's there, hand curled around his arm and chest pressed against his side. eddie's hand whips up to wrap around steve's on the gun and he shakes his arm like he's testing how tense steve is.

"noodle arms ain't gonna help you. hold it tight."

there's something about the red sky and decay in the air and eddie's gravely voice in his ear that gets to him, his southern drawl more prominent now that he's come back. it's like he's trying to be wayne, trying to replicate what he thinks a man should be because the best model for it that he's had is wayne. steve plants his feet firmly in the ground to ignore the icy shiver passing through his body.

eddie breathes in deep and steve copies him, his shoulder pressing in firmly to eddie as he does. it feels like the first real breath he's had in a while and all it took was eddie munson touching him for steve to breathe again.

"that's better," eddie says and drops his hand from steve's elbow to hover somewhere around his waist. "be relaxed, but concentrate. keep steady and don't let your eyes look away. how do you feel?"

even though he asked a question, steve feels like he shouldn't answer. in some ways, it feels like a trap, like if he says what he actually feels then it's all going to fall apart. but there's this part of him, this tiny, nagging part of him that doesn't want to go back into the bunker without telling eddie how he's felt for far too long.

"okay, i think."

"go ahead and shoot when you're ready."

"...okay."

they stand in silence for a beat. steve can feel eddie's breath tickling the long hairs at his neck and there's a ringing in his ears that he doesn't know what to do with. the air is more suffocating than ever and steve wonders if he pulled out his pocket knife if he could cut through the tension.

eddie's hand finally lands on steve's waist and it blazes through him like a bullet. how is he supposed to shoot a gun, this all powerful thing, when eddie is there? he's breathing and he's alive and he's right where steve wants him to be. he knows he must tense up, knows he must take in a shuddering breath at the contact because-

"stop," eddie says, breaking the silence and pushing away from steve. he feels colder now, the fire that licked along his veins not 3 seconds ago diminishing at the distance between them. steve sighs, takes his hand off the trigger and lets his arm hand limply at his side. "why did you ask me to help you with this? why not nancy or hop?"

his questions hits steve like an accusation and steve wishes he had expected for it not to happen. this is eddie now, he's a little bit harsh and more than a little bit angry at the world. and god, steve had hoped that being with him, that being outside with him would help just even for a minute.

he wishes the upside down would open up and swallow him whole so he could escape the glare that eddie's throwing his way, but he couldn't stand to be an addition to the pain eddie carries around on his back. steve looks him in the eye, shoulders pushed back and something like determination on his face, and hopes he can feel what he's feeling, too.

"you know why."

it's whispered but he knows eddie hears him. it's loud, always loud in hawkins now, but he knows eddie hears him.

somewhere in between dragging eddie out of hell and nursing him back to semi-okayness and staying up in the middle of the night with cold rags on foreheads and arms wrapped around waists, something started growing. steve knows he can't have all of eddie from 86 back, and that's okay. he's not the steve from 86, either.

but he'll try with every last breath he has to see him smile again.

eddie steps closer, shuffles his boots across the dirt until he can take the gun from steve's hand. he does something with it that steve can't really see, unloads the ammo and puts the empty pieces into the deep pockets of his cargo pants. there's lighting flashing across the blood red sky and he's sees it mirrored in eddie's eyes.

"you mean it?" eddie whispers back. steve is strong and he's been holding on for so long to see a light like that in the dark brown pools he's staring into that it cracks a smile onto his face and he sees eddie's lips pull up just the tiniest bit to copy him. it's a start.

"yeah."

steve knows they don't have much time left topside and soon enough hopper will be yelling over the speaker they wired up to the bunker door that they have to come in. he knows they don't have much time left in whatever hawkins has become, more and more creatures breaking through the liminal space between worlds every day.

they don't have the time, but steve would tell the earth to stop spinning for eddie any day, and fitting their palms together to tangle their fingers seems like the right way to spend whatever time they have left.

[possiblymiranda]

~ 🥀🔪📖 🍓 I hate texting let me cut fruit for you 🍓 📖 🔪 🥀~