#it is 2:38am but that’s fine | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

blood-mocha-latte · 9 months ago

Note

How about Webgott + love letters, for Valentine's day :)

greetings!! i stared at this prompt for Forever, and was trying to write it in an Organic and Normal way. and it turns out that the Organic and Normal way for me to write this was modern exes webgott. so although i’m sure it wasn’t exactly what you were thinking, i hope you enjoy <3

Sun, Feb 4, 9:38AM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Subject: Books

Web -

You forgot your collection at my house. It’s all Dostoevsky, which I knew you did on purpose, idiot. You know I can’t stand that fucker, and you took all of the Vonnegut with you.

Come back and get your books before I burn them all.

- Joe

Sun, Feb 4, 2:19PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: Books

Joe -

You have my phone number. Just text me. What if I don’t have time to check my email?

I’ll pick up my books at 6.

- David

Sun, Feb 4, 6:01PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: Books

Web -

You always check your email. At least five times a day. Don’t lie to me. And I don’t want to have to compete with your goddamn spam texts, I know you forget to delete them.

P.S. You’re late.

- Joe

——————

Fri, Feb 9, 3:06AM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Subject: Journal

I can’t find my journal. The one from August to November? Can you see it at your place? I need it.

Fri, Feb 9, 3:41AM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: Journal

It was in your nightstand. You didn’t think to clear that out?

Go to sleep. It’s ass in the morning.

Fri, Feb 9, 4:13AM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: Journal

Can I come by and pick it up before Public Speaking? And you’re the one that responded.

Fri, Feb 9, 4:39AM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: Journal

Public Speaking starts at 10, I’m at work by 6. You know where the key is.

You’re the one that emailed in the first place. I can’t believe you didn’t just text.

Fri, Feb 9, 5:01AM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: Journal

You’re so old I thought a text would confuse you.

——————

Mon, Feb 12, 9:03AM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Subject: Journalist

Why did I just get called by a guy about a sports journal? The fuck are you up to?

Mon, Feb 12, 12:41PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: Journalist

Don’t worry about it.

Mon, Feb 12, 12:52PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: Journalist

Web, he has my contact info. If you get crazy-insane murdered so do I. Did you do something?

Mon, Feb 12, 1:13PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: Journalist

Don’t be a doomsday planner. He’s not a murderer. I just went out with him one time. It didn’t end great.

CALL FROM: JOE (DON’T)

February 12, 1:27PM

“Yeah?”

“What the hell did you do?”

“What — Jesus, Joe, is this about the guy? It’s fine—”

“Yeah, see, that doesn’t exactly instill me with confidence that you didn’t do something stupid—”

“I already told you, I just went out with him. To dinner.”

“When?”

“I… I don’t have to tell you that.”

“Yes, the fuck you do, because if—”

“Oh, what, you expect me to say I went on a fucking date with him when we were still together? Get over yourself, Joe, it was five days ago—”

“I didn’t say that! I did not say that—”

“And why the hell do you care, anyways? We broke up in December, okay—”

“Jesus, that was only two months ago—”

“It was three, and that’s plenty of time—”

“I’m just saying, you won’t catch me going out with—”

“Because no one can stand your crotchety ass—”

“Oh, but they can stand yours?”

“I — Jesus fuck. I’m hanging up. He only called you because he saw your name and thought it was a different Joe. I’ve gotta get to class. I’ll see you—”

“Wait, wait, Web—”

“I’m not even going out with him again, I just was thinking about the fourteenth. I’ll see you around, okay?”

“David — fuck.”

Mon, Feb 12, 6:34PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: Journalist

I shouldn’t have pushed that far. That’s my bad.

——————

Wed, Feb 14, 5:28PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Subject: (no subject)

Can you come pick me up?

Wed, Feb 14, 5:37PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: (no subject)

Are you okay? Are you hurt?

Where are you?

Wed, Feb 14, 5:31PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: (no subject)

Outside of Delancey’s bar.

Wed, Feb 14, 5:32PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: (no subject)

Please don’t call me.

(DRAFTED EMAIL - UNSENT)

Wed, Feb 14, 5:33PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: (no subject)

I couldn’t stand to hear your voice right now.

Wed, Feb 14, 5:42PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: (no subject)

I’m on my way. Stay where you are.

——————

Sat, Mar 23, 1:18AM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Subject: (no subject)

I miss you, I think.

Sat, Mar 23, 1:23AM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: (no subject)

Finally giving in to just emailing, huh?

Go to sleep, kid.

Sat, Mar 23, 1:29AM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: (no subject)

I understand it, now.

It’s less personal.

You have to think more about what you say.

And you’re not asleep, either.

Thank you for picking me up last month.

Sat, Mar 23, 1:53AM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: (no subject)

I thought you wanted a clean break, after that. That’s what you said at the bar.

Sat, Mar 23, 2:02AM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: (no subject)

I think that once your ex picks your shitfaced ass up from a bar because he got an email, there’s no such thing as a clean break.

I think I’m just delusional.

Sat, Mar 23, 2:10AM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: (no subject)

Well, I never said you weren’t.

But it seemed like we might have made it, in this go around. It’s been almost a month since we last talked.

Sat, Mar 23, 2:18AM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: (no subject)

Well, in the words of one of the best movies of all time: I just can’t quit you.

Sat, Mar 23, 2:32AM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: (no subject)

Eugh.

——————

CALL FROM: WEB

April 6, 8:52PM

“You know, he almost broke his nose here.”

“Yeah, I do know, Web, ‘cause everyone knows that. There’s not an American alive that doesn’t know that.”

“Mm. I like this scene.”

“What, the making out? Or did the TV’s go outta sync again?”

“No, the making out. Both do a good job at the… the emotion. The desperation, I guess.”

“Mm.”

“Are you eating something? I hear chewing.”

“What are you, a cop? Can a man not eat a toblerone while watching a movie?”

“No, you can, it’s just — you’re chewing right into the receiver, Joe, it’s gross—”

“Alright, alright, I’ll put it down. See? No more chewing. Enjoy your gay cowboy movie.”

“If I recall correctly, you’re also watching the gay cowboy movie.”

“Only because it was on! And I would’ve turned it off if you didn’t call me.”

“If I didn’t — you called me!”

“Yeah, yeah, believe what you wanna believe.”

——————

Thur, April 18, 11:27PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Subject: (no subject)

I think we’re better as friends.

Thur, April 18, 12:09PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: (no subject)

What makes you say that?

Thur, April 18, 12:31PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: (no subject)

It’s just.

I can’t be the only one that thinks that we get along about a thousand times better now then we did for the entire time we dated. I mean, you would have NEVER watched a Wes Anderson film with me if we were still together.

And we talk way more too, I think. Because of the emails, maybe.

Thur, April 18, 12:54PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: (no subject)

Well, first off, the reason we talk way more is because of the emails. Because you don’t delete those spam texts and have no filter and are therefore near impossible to reach.

Second off, we still get along terribly, fuck you.

But I can understand parts of that. We’re still seeing each other just as much as when we were together, I’d say. Now you’re just half an hour away, though. Much shorter distance.

Thur, April 18, 1:08PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: (no subject)

Do you think we’d still be together? If we hadn’t been long distance for so long?

And I’m just saying. You never would have agreed with me on any of this if we’d still been doing the whole dog and pony show. You just don’t have the bone in your head that says to be nice to people.

Thur, April 18, 1:19PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: (no subject)

I disagree with you on everything just on principle.

——————

Fri, May 3, 7:12PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Subject: The New Deal

I want to propose something.

Fri, May 3, 7:39PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: The New Deal

You get five sentences.

Fri, May 3, 7:57PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: The New Deal

If neither of us is married by forty, we marry each other.

Fri, May 3, 9:02PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: The New Deal

That is the most stereotypical bullshit I’ve ever heard in my entire life.

And I’ll be forty in five years, you’ve got a while. How in the hell does that even work?

Fri, May 3, 9:23PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: The New Deal

It works in normal marriage ways, idiot.

And that’s why I was thinking about it, anyways. You’re 40 in 5 years, I’m 40 in 12 years, we just split the difference and get married in 7 years. Avoid a lot of hassle.

Fri, May 3, 9:44PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: The New Deal

When you say you were thinking about it, it makes you sound like this is a pity marriage thing. Which is weird, by the way. I don’t think that’s how it works, anyways. That’s more of a heterosexual friends who are scared they’ll die alone sort of deal. Real platonic like.

Fri, May 3, 10:01PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: The New Deal

This isn’t a pity marriage thing! I just think that it’s something to consider. Unless one of us gets hitched in the next 7 years, it doesn’t seem like a half bad plan.

Fri, May 3, 10:19PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: The New Deal

Oh, I have plenty of issues with this plan.

But fine. We’ll get pity-married in 7 years. You’ll be a child bride.

Fri, May 3, 10:34PM

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Re: The New Deal

I’ll be 33, dickhead.

——————

CALL FROM: JOE

May 19, 9:54AM

“The German dog tags are a nice touch.”

“Mm. ‘s an interesting movie. I like this part, though. It’s incredibly violent.”

“Yeah, I figured. I dragged this fucking DVD across the country and rented a DVD player from the hotel to sync this movie with you, and get such wonderful comments as I like that it’s violent.”

“Well, I do! Nothing much to add there, really. D’you have anything smart to say, jackass?”

“You’re chewing into the receiver again. And not at this particular scene, though. I just like Eli Roth in this movie.”

“Hm. Figures. Want me to start bashing people's heads in with a bat? I could be the Bear Jew.”

“No one could be the Bear Jew. I’m sorry to tell you this. You don’t have the flair. Or the height.”

“Oh, go straight for the jugular, why don’t you—”

“It’s true! You’re chewing, again.”

“How’s everything going?”

“Ugh. Fine. I hate these fucking tours.”

“I know. That’s why I delight in them so much.”

“I hate you.”

“Yeah, yeah. Do you still want me to pick you up from the airport?”

“...yeah. I can’t get anyone else to do it.”

“Don’t worry. I’ll spare you the humiliation of having to be picked up by your ex. I’ll wear a hat and sunglasses. Send me the information.”

“Oh, yack it up, asshole. And I’ll email you.”

“Fine. Remember to make sure it has a fucking subject, I hate it when you do that.”

“Shut up. I’m trying to watch this.”

“Mm. But you’ll still email me?”

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll still email you, Lieb.”

#rie writes #making up email handles took years off my life btw. legit nearly killed me #also i know this is Off and i'm sorry!! hope ya... like?#for some reason with this i was like hmmmmmm. i have Never written words in my life #anyways. this is queued which doesn't really matter but seems important to mention #band of brothers #webgott #david webster #joe liebgott #hbo war

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simphellscape · 1 year ago

Text

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 12TH, 2020- 5:24PM // SUNDAY, DECEMBER 13TH, 2020 - 2:38AM // next | tw: alcohol, horny bird pt. 2

SUNDAY, DECEMBER 13TH, 2020 - 2:38AM

“Cheater!” Kei exclaims, scattering several UNO cards across the floor, “You’re -hic- cheating.”

He pouts dramatically, throwing himself against the living room carpet. This childish display has you cackling. Perhaps he’s a bit too drunk, but it doesn’t matter because so are you.

“Can we play a different game, please?” he pleads, slurring.

“It’s not my fault that I’m a god, Kei!”

“If I wasn’t drunk, you’d be a goner.”

“You said five minutes ago that you aren’t even drunk!”

“I’m not!”

“Liar!”

“Different game!” he bellows, still throwing a tantrum.

You reach over and flick the back of his head. Even though you’re hammered, you still manage to land it squarely in the center. His head flies off the floor to face you, honey eyes narrowed.

“You’re dead, (Y/L/N).”

One of his feathers darts toward you, aiming directly for your exposed ribs. You know this game far too well, and while you could easily avoid his attack, you secretly enjoy this kind of attention. In a way, it’s like he’s touching you. That’s what you tell yourself, anyway.

You leap to your feet and begin sprinting in the direction of your bedroom, but the feather is simply too fast. Before you can even make it through the door, it’s teasing the sensitive area, causing you to convulse with defeat. You, unfortunately, are being tickled within an inch of your life.

“K-Kei!” you shout, breathless and laughing, “Stop it!”

“No, you flicked me!”

You crash into the wall and slide to the floor, feather never leaving your side.

“I’m gonna pee!”

“You shoulda thought of that before you flicked me, then!”

“I -- fuck -- I’m sorry!”

“What? Can’t hear you. Speak up!”

“I’M SORRY!”

“That’s what I thought,” he says, a fake threatening tone to his voice.

With that, the feather zips back into the fold of his wings, bumping into a lamp on the way. You stay slumped against the wall, attempting to catch your breath. Meanwhile, Kei has raised himself to a relaxed sitting position on the living room floor.

“Now, a different game, please,” he smiles.

“Fine, crybaby.”

“Watch it, or I’ll tickle you again!”

“Nooo!” you whine, returning to your spot on the living room carpet with a graceless thump.

“I have an idea!” Kei gasps.

“Shoot.”

“How about, um, Truth or Dare, but, like, with alcohol! Like you take a shot if you don’t wanna do your truth… or your dare… or whatever.”

“I didn’t realize we were sixteen years old.”

He calls a feather to hover dangerously close to your ribcage once again.

“Jesus, alright! Just put that shit away.”

He smirks with satisfaction as the torture device returns to its crimson plume.

“I’ll go first!”

“Hold on, let me get the vodka,” you grumble, hoisting yourself up.

As you hobble to the kitchen, Kei begins the game anyway.

“Truth or dare?”

“Let’s do truth,” you decide after a moment, returning with the bottle of vodka.

“You’re no fun,” he pouts, considering his options, “Hmm…. oh! Okay, so, you’ve got good aim.”

“Yeah. Truth or dare?”

“I WASN’T DONE YET!”

“I’m teasing, Kei! Someone’s touchy.”

“Leave me alone,” he growls, “I wanted to know what your quirk really is. Because I don’t think that’s all.”

“Yeah, that’s not all. All of my senses -- you know, sight, hearing, whatever -- are better than a normal person’s. Not all of them are the same amount of better though! My sight is the best, and then touch, then -hic- hearing, smell, and taste. It kinda sucked at first, but I worked really hard to make it worth something, ya know? I even got an ultimate move out of it!”

Kei’s mouth is hanging open in real, but overexaggerated shock.

“Really? Show me!”

“It’s not really something I can show you…”

“Oh. Well, can you, like, tell me about it then?”

At this, Kei scooches closer towards you, eyes widening even further.

“I just, um, focus more, and it makes my senses almost perfect. Like they’re great on their own, but with more focus it gets to the point where, like, I can tell what people are gonna do before they’re finished doing it. It’s like -- ‘oh, I can hear their pinky toe moving in their shoe, they’re probably gonna take a step’. It gives me a migraine when I’m done though.”

Kei nods and begins the long, arduous process of standing up.

“Okay, so I’m gonna get up and then I’m gonna do something totally unexpected. You gotta say what I’m gonna do.”

“I just told you it makes my head hurt, birdbrain!”

“But I wanna seeeeee!”

“You can see it later! I don’t think I can do it right now, anyway. I’m drunk.”

He rolls his eyes and crosses his arms across his chest.

You learned from your last time drinking together that when Kei drinks, he often wants to play some sort of game. And when he’s drunk and playing a game, one of two things can happen. One, he gets extremely competitive. This is what happened last time, when he flipped your game of LIFE off of your coffee table. Or, two, he becomes a big, mopey baby, which is what’s happening right now. You know it’s all in jest, and while it’s slightly annoying, it’s mostly endearing. You can’t wait to remind him about this tomorrow. If you’re even able to remember, that is.

“Truth or dare?”

“I’m gonna pick dare, because I’m not a loser,” he mocks.

“Oh, now I’m gonna pick something terrible.”

You scan the room, drunkenly scrambling to find something hellish for him to do as revenge. You just did a deep clean of the whole apartment, so there’s nothing really gross around here that you can think of. You’re fresh out of mushrooms, otherwise you’d make him eat one. You know he would have hated that. You could make him wear one of your bras on his head, but that would require him to see it. Too embarrassing for you. Suddenly, a lightbulb pops in your head.

“Let me touch your wings.”

There are two reasons for this diabolical idea. Kei talks all the time about how he loathes when fans touch his feathers without his consent. But also, selfishly, you just really want to know what they feel like. You’ve felt individual feathers before, and they’re incredibly soft. Feeling multiple all at once sounds heavenly.

“No. Absolutely not!”

“Now you’re no fun!”

“They’re sensitive!”

“I’ll be gentle.”

“No, that’s wooorse!”

“How the fuck is that worse?”

In addition to the flush of Kei’s intoxicated cheeks, a new pinkess spreads across them.

“Either let me touch your wings for a few seconds or take a shot,” you urge him.

He locks hazy eyes with you, and you can see the gears turning in his head. Simultaneously, the gears are turning in your own. You can’t really gather how it would be worse for you to be gentle with them. Holding back on the pressure couldn’t possibly hurt him. In fact, that seems like it would be more pleasurable for him.

Your brain stops in its tracks.

Pleasurable.

Before you can stop yourself, you share your revelation.

“You don’t want me to touch them because you’ll like it too much!”

“No, I--”

“Don’t lie, Kei!”

“I don’t--”

“No, you do know!”

“FINE, TOUCH THEM!” he concedes, throwing his arms in the air.

You grin widely, feeling victorious, as he turns to the side. You use this opportunity to scooch closer to him, preparing to caress the plumes.

You could go about this one of two ways, you figure. You could make this as easy as possible for him. A quick stroke across a small section. Or, you could make this extremely difficult for him, running your fingers between the expanse of the whole wing. Something about the intimacy of the interaction, the inhibiting effect of the alcohol, and your burning desire to touch his wings, to touch him, make you pick the latter.

You wiggle beside his extended leg, facing the wing directly. Before you touch him, something possesses you to lean towards him and whisper in his ear.

“Remember, this game was your idea.”

All in the same motion, you draw your head back and carefully dive your fingers into his wings. As you run them along the surface, you suck in a breath. You expected them to be soft, but you’re taken aback. It has exceeded your expectations by a lot. Your fingertips tingle at the way each feather teases them. The fine barbs feel smooth underneath your touch. A strange sensation zips its way up your arm like it’s a live wire. You move at a sloth’s pace, wanting to savor this feeling for as long as possible, mesmerized. You’re only halfway across when Kei’s hand closes around your wrist, forcefully yanking it away.

His previously hazy eyes are now dark, met firmly with the wall directly across from him. His breathing is labored, shoulders heaving with each inhale and exhale. The previously pink flush in his cheeks is now beet red. Warmth spreads in your midsection, intoxicated by both the restraint he has you in and the downright primal look on his face.

“That’s enough,” he asserts, sternly.

You flounder, looking deep within you for some sort of snarky reply. There’s nothing left in your head; it seems that this interaction has wiped them all away. You feel redness creep up your neck and into your face. Your heart is beating out of your chest. You’re sure that Kei can hear it loud and clear. You swallow hard, and attempt to find your voice.

“Come on, that was nothing,” you offer, weakly.

Your gaze flickers from his eyes to his lips. They’re parted slightly to allow for his panting breaths. The image of him closing the distance between you, crashing them against yours, flashes across your brain. Working against them in expert fashion. Just like you’ve wanted for so long. You can practically feel the pressure of them, sucking on your bottom lip and lightly nipping. To satiate the need you suddenly feel, you take your bottom lip between your teeth, returning your gaze to the predator before you.

_____________________________________________________________________________

Keigo’s palm burns around your wrist. It’s taking everything in him to refrain from pinning you down on the floor and reenacting the images flashing in his head. Your heartbeat is drumlike, rapid, and even more inebriating than the copious amounts of liquor he’s had tonight. Your erratic breaths cause your chest to brush lightly against his forearm, the additional contact driving him further into insanity. After years of training, he knows that this is the ultimate test of his will. He’s losing.

A part of him consistently suggests that loving you isn’t a venture that’s destined to fail. The rest of him usually overshadows that, spouting endless excuses for his actions. Well, rather, inaction. Right now, he’s forgotten every reason he’d previously given himself. No matter how badly he wants to, how desperately he needs to, he can’t bring himself to look at you. If your expression is anywhere near what he’s imagining it to be, he won’t be able to stop himself. In his soul, he knows that if he acts right now, he will be completely unable to show anything resembling mercy. The already looming threat of going completely feral will swallow him whole, and he will fuck you into oblivion.

It’s appealing, the thought of releasing hold on his inhibitions. The only thing stopping him now is the thing that stops him from doing a lot of things these days.

He must, above anything and everything else, keep people safe. And you just happen to be at the very top of the list of people in the world.

This is as instinctual as breathing for him. A knee jerk reaction to outside stimuli. His outside might be extremely stimulated right now, but the core of his very existence will not allow this to continue. Not like this. If he’s ever presented with the opportunity to sleep with you, it has to be centered around you. It has to be considerate. It has to be gentle. The current state of things doesn’t equate to that at all. Of course he cares about you, about your safety. He also cares about being a decent human being, a decent pro-hero, even in the face of quickly reducing into an animal.

Finally, in the raging battle of Keigo versus avian instinct, Keigo emerges victorious.

In one swift motion, he releases his grip on your wrist and raises himself off the ground. Semi-rational thought slowly starts to flow back into his head. He knows that whatever the hell all that was effectively ruined the banter for the night. The way he reacted to your touch scared himself, and he can’t even begin to imagine how terrified you must feel. Moments like these reacquainted him with the fact that his quirk, combined with all of the meddling the Commission did to him, essentially made him a monster. He goes to great lengths to hide that from the rest of the world, but now he’s revealed the most ugly part of himself to the only person in the entire place that matters. You, his entire life, now know that even the most human of hawks are predators, too.

He stumbles to your balcony. In his altered mind, he believes that leaving would be the ultimate courtesy to you right now. It doesn’t matter that he’s plastered. It doesn’t matter that you’re already following him, begging him to stay. No one, especially you, deserves to spend another moment with such an unholy creature as Keigo Takami.

Without so much as a backward glance, he surges off of the balcony and into the night sky. His aim is to fly across the city, across the country, across the world. But, his double vision doesn’t grant him much aid in the darkness. Before he can make it even fifty feet from your apartment building, he clips the one across from you with his massive wing. In any normal circumstance, he would be able to recover from this without much issue. But he’s shitfaced. So, instead, he careens into the street below at remarkable speeds. With a yelp, he lands on the gravel and slides, scraping his entire left side. For a moment, his deafening, panic induced thoughts are quiet. It happens to be just long enough to hear you from your apartment four stories above.

“KEI!”

A pro-hero such as him should be able to take an injury like this like it’s nothing. In fact, he’s done it countless times before. Something about the drunkenness and the complete descent into self-loathing keeps him glued to the pavement. He knows you’re coming. He knows he’s going to have to face you. He knows that you’re probably worried out of your goddamn mind. He knows it’s all his fault.

For the first time in recent memory, Keigo feels entirely lost. Though he’s tried so hard, he knows now that you’ve found him out. In his perfect world, he hoped that you took his lack of affection and general emotional standoffishness as a sort of defense mechanism. In essence, that’s what it was, but he never wanted you to find out any of the myriad of things he was defending himself from -- defending you from. Now, there’s no way in hell you could view it as anything else. He wants you. Badly. And now, you know.

He hoists himself up into a sitting position with difficulty, both hands finding their way to his hair. The panic is starting to give way to crushing defeat. He’s already running through ideas on how to cope with the loss of your presence in his life. After the imminent rejection he’s about to face, he’ll have to cut off contact with you for his own sanity, at least for a little while. Maybe he can contact Kana and see if there’s any way she can assign another pro-hero to your case. Just as he’s running through candidates to recommend, he hears your sandals crunching against the gravel.

“Hey!” you call out.

Keigo inhales deeply and raises his head.

“Oh, thank fuck,” you breathe as you approach him.

You stumble slightly as you finally reach him, hands reaching out. You crouch beside him and begin to inspect his form, picking pieces of the ground off of it.

“(Y/N)...” Keigo sighs.

You shift your focus from cleaning him up to his face. As soon as you see the look of despair on it, your own face drops.

“What? Kei, what’s wrong?”

Is it possible that you aren’t as thrown off by this interaction as he is? Did this even phase you at all?

“Um.. you were there five minutes ago too, right? You witnessed the shit that I just pulled?” he asks, softly.

“Yeah, you jumped out of a fucking window! Of course I witnessed that, you idiot!”

Of course you didn’t care about the fact that he almost acted on his innermost desires in the most animalistic way possible. As always, you just wanted him to be okay. He should have suspected as much.

But, after tonight, he’s not sure if he’s physically able to keep the act up much longer.

“I meant before that.”

Redness creeps across your cheeks as you nod in recognition.

“Yeah, uh, I did witness that,” you whisper.

“And,” Keigo gulps, “did that… uh… scare you? At all?”

You laugh nervously. A flighty and musical sound. Keigo’s heart drums faster.

“No. I wasn’t scared. I was…” you trail off.

You suddenly groan and throw your hands over your face.

“God, Kei, don’t make me say this,” you cry.

His mind races. What could possibly be worse than making you scared by that? He can’t immediately think of anything, but whatever it is must be awful. He definitely won’t be seeing you ever again after this, but he needs to know. He has to prevent this from happening ever again. Not that it ever will, because he doubts that he’ll ever let his guard down like this from now on.

“You’re gonna have to. I’m not following,” he mutters.

You whine, and retract your hands. Your eyes are glued to his chest, as if that’s as close as you can get them to his eyes at the moment.

“I -- it kind of… turned me on.”

Keigo feels as if someone dumped a gallon of cold water over his head. In fact, if someone managed to do that right now, he would probably be less shocked. He can feel his mouth drying out from the amount of time he’s spent with it hanging open.

“See! I knew I shouldn’t have said anything,” you groan, shifting to raise yourself up.

Without thinking, he wraps his hand around your wrist again, pulling you towards him. You fall to your knees, face inches away from his own. He searches you one final time for any sign of regret, but all he finds is a desperate, pleading expression. He somehow finds it in him to speak.

“Can I?”

You nod softly and he does what he’s been wanting to do for months.

The first thing he notices when his lips finally meet yours is the taste of strawberry vodka. The second thing, hitting him immediately after, is an explosion in his chest. It’s a million sensations at once -- flowers blooming, fireworks popping, the sun rising. Keigo has done a lot of things in his short life, but not one of them has even come close to the pleasure of kissing you.

What was a tentative, slow pace quickly evolves into something needy, something frantic. His hands shift from the soft grip around your wrist to tangle themselves in your hair, pushing you closer to him. Even though you’re practically on top of him now, you’re not close enough, and he doesn’t think you ever will be. His tongue swipes against your lips, begging for entrance. You happily oblige, and he delves deep into you. As your teeth crash together, Keigo begins struggling for breath. He doesn’t want it, maybe he doesn’t even need it. Now, he feels as though you’re the only thing he needs to survive. Just as he accepts that as fact, you break away to rest your forehead on his. You’re panting, giggling softly between breaths. As he collects his thoughts, his mouth moves before any of the rest of him can.

“You have no idea how long I’ve been wanting to do that,” he whispers.

“You should have done it sooner,” you retort, still out of breath.

He’s beginning to regain control of his body now, so he pulls away from you just far enough to plant a soft kiss against your nose. Even though he would love to continue to feel the most unique and gratifying thing he’s ever felt, he recognizes that now is not the time nor the place. But, if he has anything to say about it, there will be plenty more opportunities, scattered across the rest of time. He pauses as that thought, at how a simple kiss has fixed the position he’d been saving for you since the moment he laid eyes on you. You, his first friend, his last love. He finds your hand and squeezes it.

“It’s getting pretty late. You should probably get to bed,” he suggests.

“You could stay with me, if you wanted. I wouldn’t want you to get arrested for drunk flying,” you chuckle.

The smile that sprouts on Keigo’s face is strong enough to break his cheekbones. It’s a miracle that they stay intact.

“You’re absolutely right. Always looking out for me, aren’t you?”

He lifts himself up and pulls you with him. As the two of you walk back to your apartment, your pinky fingers are linked together. It’s a small, almost lazy connection, but neither of you seem to be able to entertain the thought of letting go.

(a/n): fuckin finally amirite

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abeautylives · 2 years ago

Text

Imperfect Moments - Chapter Four

a/n: This one is so short, it’s more of a half chapter 🫣 I’m sorry!! Accept me giving it to you earlier than planned as an apology. The next one will come soooo soon.

Series Masterlist

pairing: Jakexfemale!reader

word count: just over 1k this chapter I’m so sorry

series summary: You’re in love with your best friend. His twin brother hates you. Or does he?

warnings: 18+ minors stay away, language, mention of sex

The sun woke you the next morning, the harsh glare of it landing across your face and forcing you to roll away from it. The motion made it abundantly clear that a headache would be in your near future. Pushing up from the mattress with a groan, you toss your blanket away and get up to head to the kitchen. You don’t check your phone until coffee is brewing and you’ve swallowed a few ibuprofen and chugged a glass of water. Turning Do Not Disturb off, you find a handful of texts and three missed calls from Josh. One from very late last night and two this morning. His first texts are apologetic, until they turn accusatory.

Josh ☀️: What exactly were you doing with Jake before I found you??

Josh ☀️: My BROTHER

Josh ☀️: Unbelievable honestly

When you hadn’t responded, he’d left you last night with a final apology, but only for the way he’d spoken about you. Nothing about how he’d treated you earlier in the day, nothing about how he’d acted during the party. This morning he’d sent only one.

Josh ☀️: Just call me back

You had no plans to do so. After pouring your first cup of coffee, you settle onto your couch and open a string of texts from an unsaved number, unable to stop the smile that forms.

UNKNOWN (1:38am): Hey it’s Jake

UNKNOWN (1:38am): Hope you got home ok

You’d been deep into that bottle of wine by then.

UNKNOWN (2:06am): Call me tomorrow if you wanna talk

UNKNOWN (2:06am): About anything

UNKNOWN (2:09am): It doesn’t have to be about us or whatever

UNKNOWN (2:09am): I’ll be here if you need me

UNKNOWN (11:11am): Good morning 🙂

In quiet contemplation, you set your phone onto the cushion next to you and sip your coffee. After a shower and a second cup, you pick it up and hit Call on the still unsaved number. It rings for a long time but just as you’re about to hang up, a slightly out of breath voice comes over the line.

“Hey, Y/N, hi.” You can hear him trying to calm his breathing, in through his nose and out past his lips.

“Hello Jacob, is this a bad time?” Though you’ve technically known him for over a year and a half, you don’t know anything about his habits, his personal life. You’re not sure what you could’ve been interrupting and you think briefly that you should’ve texted him first.

“No, no, sorry. I was downstairs with Jo- I was downstairs.” He’d been sitting in the kitchen, across the island from his brother. The air was already thick with tension as they mumbled stubborn and unspecific apologies to each other for the night before and when Jake’s phone, lying face up on the marble, started ringing they'd both looked at it. Your name scrolling across the top of the screen had Josh cursing under his breath. Jake had grabbed the phone and jogged across the room and up the stairs, waiting to answer it until he was behind the closed door of his bedroom. “How are you, did you sleep okay?”

“Well I did have some trouble falling asleep, someone was blowing up my phone,” you jest.

“Oh, oh, I’m so sorry, I didn’t-“

“I’m joking,” you giggle at the mild panic in his voice, “I slept fine.”

You hear him let out a breath he’d been holding. “Good, that’s good…” He lets silence take over for a moment before asking, “So… why are you calling?” He’s not sure he’s prepared for whatever the answer is. He’d meant it when he said you could talk to him, about Josh if need be, but he’d also been very specific in the hallway.

If you wake up tomorrow and you still want me to show you exactly how you should be treated, exactly what you deserve…

“I’ve thought about what you said. Probably not enough, but… I haven’t changed my mind.” You’ve lowered your voice as if someone could overhear. His reply is equally low, the soft timbre of his voice causes goosebumps to raise across your skin.

“Is that right, sweetheart? You want me to fuck you?”

Oh. No one had ever spoken to you the way Jake has over the last few days, especially not over the phone. You feel your face get hot and the flush creeps down your neck.

“I- yes. Yeah.”

“You sure? If we do this, there’s no going back…” It’s true, but it’s laced with wishful thinking. It would irreversibly change things; your friendship with his brother, mainly but if he has his way, you’ll keep coming back to him. Maybe permanently.

“I’m sure.” It comes out stronger this time, but it’s met with silence. You can’t see the grin that’s taking over his face or the way he shifts at the edge of the bed where he’s sitting, adjusting himself in his sweatpants.

“Okay. Okay. Um, do you, I mean would you wanna come over later?”

“Don’t you think that’s a bad idea? Because… Josh, you know.”

“Right right… um-“ His typically smooth persona is cracking and he’s embarrassed that he’s suddenly overthinking things.

“Jake, why don’t you just come to my place?” Your decision has been made and you’re feeling more sure of yourself than you have in days. “You have no idea where I live,” you chuckle at how absurd it is. His twin has spent countless hours in your apartment and Jake has never even asked him where he’s been.

“Text it to me. Tell me when to be there, I’ll be there.”

“Will do. I’ll let you go then, I guess…” You really don’t want to hang up, odd since you’ve barely spoken a handful of sentences to him at a time before last night. Now that you've stammered through this phone call, you don’t feel ready to let it end.

“Yeah, okay. I’ll see you later Y/N.”

“See you later Jake.”

Neither of you move to hang up.

“Bye Jake,” you whisper.

He laughs softly before responding, “Bye sweetheart.” He ends the call, head already swimming with thoughts of later.

A door slams somewhere downstairs.

Taglist:

@lightmylove-gvf @spicedandicedtea @weneedsomehealing123 @milkgemini @why-ami-on-here @gretavanbitches @twistedmelodies @wildflowerxx-x @dannythedog @blissfulbellss @averagemisfit03 @dharmasdivine @thetroublegetssoloud71 @lucimoo @toxbexannouncedx @dig0930

Please let me know if you’d like to be added ❤️

#greta van fleet #gvf #greta van fleet fic #greta van fleet fan fiction #greta van fleet smut #gvf fic #gvf fan fiction #gvf smut #jake kiszka #jake gvf #jake kiszka smut #jake kiszka fanfic

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up-in-space-reading · 3 months ago

Text

Average Weekly Screentime - Chap 2: Motorbikes and Movie Nights

pairing: Jake Peralta x Amy Santiago

word count: 1908

warnings/tags: college au, texting, drunk texting, text fic (mostly, there's prose a few chaps in), bets, bisexual!jake peralta, jake peralta has adhd, parties, drinking and alcohol, sexual references, implied sexual content (nothing explicit, just suggested its going to happen/has happened), friends to lovers, swearing, mentions of cannibalism, lighthearted threats of violence (typical rosa stuff yk), fluff

read on ao3

Average Weekly Screentime masterlist

Story Summary: texting fic college AU with the squad! It's the beginning of the school year and while everyone else thinks it'll be the same as the previous year, Gina has a feeling things are going to be different and wagers a bet with Rosa and Charles. Told through all the various group chats everyone is in.

authors note: i was gonna wait until i had more written to post another chapter but i felt bad making you wait so here is another chapter! i wanted to title this chapter differently but the one i first came up with rhymes so we've GOTTA stick with that.

Thank you for reading and hope you enjoy!! <3

Jimmy Jabbers

[11:23am, Thursday]

Queen G: okay we NEED to go to a party this weekend or im gonna start pulling my hair out Queen G: im being semi-serious btw

RoRo: name a time and place RoRo: I just show up if I feel like it

Pineapples: gina ur a genius Pineapples: party this weekend is a m u s t

Mr Grapes: I’m in but does anyone even know someone having a party

Four Eyes: I’m with Rosa, name the time and place and I’ll see if I can make it

Queen G: firstly – ur not getting out of this one amy, nice try tho Queen G: secondly – charles I know MANY people and at least one of them will be having a party Queen G: give me 10 and I’ll sort everyones weekend plans

Pineapples: love u gina

Queen G: thank u

Sexy Bitches

[11:28am, Thursday]

Sexy: what are ur weekend plans ter?

Ter Bear: James is throwing a party at ours on Saturday. Claims its his birthday but his birthday is in summer

Sexy: and im assuming ur gonna invite ur bestie gina?

Ter Bear: Sure, but you can’t DJ

Sexy: seriously??? Sexy: what if i sent u my playlist Sexy: u can make an informed decision

Ter Bear: Fine, but I’m not making any promises

Jimmy Jabbers

[11:33am, Thursday]

Queen G: great news! Queen G: ter bear having a party at his

Pineapples: count me in!

Mr Grapes: me too!

RoRo: yeah sure

Four Eyes: I don’t know..

Pineapples: still recovering from the last party??

Four Eyes: Very much so Four Eyes: I’ll come but no drinking

Queen G: boooooooo

Four Eyes: I’ll be designated driver?

Queen G: amy ur the beessttt

Skipping School Is(n’t) Cool

[11:38am, Thursday]

Ferris: u dont have to come

Cameron: I know, I’ll probably regret if I don’t though. My mother keeps bothering me to make sure I’m making the most out college

Ferris: what if making the most out of it is being a regular in the library and handing assignments in a week early Ferris: has ur mom ever considered that

Cameron: Haha I don’t think she has but I’ll bring it up next time she calls me

Ferris: tell her i said that Ferris: i want credit

Cameron: Will do

Jimmy Jabbers

[9:06pm, Saturday]

Four Eyes: Leaving my dorm now, you all better be ready. Meet you in the parking lot.

Queen G: rosa and i on our way

Pineapples: charles and i also on our way

Four Eyes: Can’t believe I wasn’t invited to any of the getting ready sessions?!

Queen G: we were pregaming Queen G: next time u will be invited

Four Eyes: Fine. Now get your asses down here.

[10:04pm, Saturday]

Four Eyes: Can’t believe I’ve already lost Rosa, does anyone know where she is?

Queen G: with me Queen G: we’re dancing and drinking

Four Eyes: Fantastic

[11:24pm, Saturday]

Pineapples: anyone seen amy?? Pineapples: cant find her

RoRo: shut up or come to the kitchen and drink peralta

Queen G: charles hitting on a girl Queen G: trainwreck

Skipping School Is(n’t) Cool

[11:26pm, Saturday]

Ferris: where r u?

Cameron: Outside, it was too loud inside

Ferris: u okay?

Cameron: I’m fine, will be in soon

Jimmy Jabbers

[12:28pm, Sunday]

Pineapples: my whole body has dry mouth

Four Eyes: I’m not surprised considering you almost threw up in my car

Pineapples: worth it

Skipping School Is(n’t) Cool

[12:43pm, Sunday]

Ferris: u alright?

Cameron: I’m fine, I just really don’t think I was in the mood for that party last night

Ferris: fair enough Ferris: when i feel like that i pretend to be a different person

Cameron: I’m not surprised you do that, maybe next time I’ll try it. For now I’m gonna focus on studying

Ferris: as if u need to do more

Cameron: There’s always new material to be worked on, you know

Ferris: news to me lol

Jimmy Jabbers

[06:54pm, Tuesday]

Pineapples: calling it now Pineapples: anakin is darth vader

Four Eyes: Wait what???

Mr Grapes: jake, have you ever seen star wars??

Pineapples: this is my first time! Pineapples: i get why people like these

Four Eyes: Oh my God..

Pineapples: i gotta ask tho Pineapples: why the purple lightsaber

Mr Grapes: don’t worry about it, it really doesn’t matter

Pineapples: sure thing!

[07:45pm, Tuesday]

Pineapples: im literally so smart guys

Four Eyes: Jake in the nicest way possible, everyone knew about Anakin

Pineapples: seriously??

Queen G: even i knew that and i dont watch movies like that

Pineapples: aw man…

RoRo: Jake ‘I worked out that Anakin was Darth Vader all on my own’ Peralta

Pineapples: idc i still liked the movie

Bi Besties

[04:02pm, Wednesday]

Dagger: if you message me one more time about this I’ll burn your die hard poster

El Baboso: i know about motorbikes I swear!

Dagger: gina knows more about motorbikes than you do

El Baboso: wanna take that bet?

Dagger: NO JAKE

Jimmy Jabbers

[04:04pm, Wednesday]

Pineapples: @Queen G can u name some motorbikes?

Queen G: sure thing babe Queen G: bike 1, bike 2, bike 3, bike 4, bike 5, bike 6, harry Harley, harriet Harley, henry Harley, hobie Harley, hotel Harley, and bike 7

RoRo: I have nothing to say

Pineapples: check. mate.

Skipping School Is(n’t) Cool

[08:03pm, Friday]

Ferris: amy can i be super honest with u rn?

Cameron: Of course, is everything okay?

Ferris: this is hard for me to admit tbh Ferris: but ive gotta do whats best

Cameron: Jake, you’re making me worried

Ferris: i need help

Cameron: Are you alright? What’s going on?

Ferris: im behind on assignments and idk what im doing Ferris: can u help me???

Cameron: That’s it?! You scared the hell out of me! Cameron: Yes, I can help you with the assignments as long as you don’t do that again

Ferris: pinky promise! Ferris: library tomorrow??

Cameron: Sounds good

Dance Squad

[01:32pm, Saturday]

G-Hive: ive just gotten some incredibly interesting news

Charlese: dish sis!

G-Hive: ignoring that G-Hive: jake and amy are studying together at the library

Scary: and?

G-Hive: and?! G-Hive: they’re getting cozy

Charlese: they didn’t invite anyone else? that’s weird

G-Hive: i never thought id say this but thank you charles! G-Hive: you get it!!

Scary: so what, you think there’s something happening?

G-Hive: nothing serious because its just studying but voluntarily spending time alone together G-Hive: bit suspish if u ask me

Charlese: its all coming together and im on track to win this bet Charlese: get ready to pay up guys

Scary: absolutely not happening, just because they’re studying alone together doesn’t mean they’re gonna get together in the next three weeks

G-Hive: but its a step in the right direction

Charlese: i still have confidence

Scary: and its still misplaced

Skipping School Is(n’t) Cool

[10:06am, Wednesday]

Cameron: Holt has just sent out an email cancelling this afternoon’s class, do you want to go to the library and work on your assignments for a bit?

Ferris: thats great news i should really check my email more Ferris: library sounds good as long as we get food Ferris: im hungry

Cameron: Did you not have breakfast this morning?

Ferris: ran out of fruit loops Ferris: heartbreaking tbh

Cameron: Your nutrition (or lack thereof) scares me

Ferris: thank u!

Jimmy Jabbers

[09:35pm, Thursday]

Queen G: manifesting that one day ill have a famous bf

RoRo: are you doing anything to actually achieve that goal?

Queen G: chris evans is bad in bed and if he wants me to stop saying it he’ll have to come prove me wrong

Pineapples: i second that!!

[11:32am, Saturday]

Four Eyes: Does anyone want to come get lunch at Sal’s?

Queen G: cant, getting my nails done

RoRo: also can’t, gina dragged me to her nail appointment

Pineapples: yeah im down for lunch

Mr Grapes: I’m ordering in Ethiopian so I’ll pass Mr Grapes: next time though!

Skipping School Is(n’t) Cool

[11:34am, Saturday]

Cameron: Meet outside the building?

Ferris: see u in a few!

Dance Squad

[11:34am, Saturday]

G-Hive: its all happening babes

Scary: sure it is

Jimmy Jabbers

[01:08am, Friday]

Pineapples: i wanna start by saying that i will NOT be held accountable for my own actions Pineapples: now, free of judgement Pineapples: how do i get red wine out of carpet

[01:13am, Friday]

Pineapples: you guys suck

Skipping School Is(n’t) Cool

[01:16am, Friday]

*Ferris made an audio call to Cameron*

“Jake, what’s wrong?”

“I spilled a drink on the carpet of my dorm and I don’t know what to do, they’ll charge me to replace the carpet or something and I can’t afford that-“

“Okay okay, calm down it’s gonna be fine. What did you spill, and be honest with me”

“Red wine..”

“What?”

“I wanted to try it because I’ve never had it before and I went to put the glass down on the table and miscalculated and knocked my hand and it spilled”

“Is your hand okay?”

“Yeah its fine”

“Okay great, the next time you drink red wine in your dorm I’m going to kill you. Now, you’re gonna need two cups of warm water, tablespoon of dish soap, tablespoon of vinegar and mix together. Pour on the stain in little bits and blot until its disappeared”

“You’re a lifesaver Ames, I owe you big time”

“Yes you do. Now I’m going back to sleep, goodnight”

“Goodnight”

[01:29am, Friday]

Cameron: 1 image attached Cameron: good as new!

[08:02am, Friday]

Ferris: I’m glad. Never drink red wine in your dorm ever again.

[10:12am, Friday]

Cameron: i promise!

The Night Boys

[10:15am, Friday]

Sidewinder: sorry I didn’t see your message in the chat Sidewinder: how did u go with the stain?

Deathblade: i called amy and she told me how to clean it up Deathblade: looks good as new now! Deathblade: 1 image attached

Sidewinder: THAT’S SO GREAT

Deathblade: thanks

Dance Squad

[10:17am, Friday]

Charlese: 1 image attached Charlese: well well well

G-Hive: boyle if u win this bet im going to delete my insta

Charlese: tempting offer but I’ll do you the kindness of just taking your $50

G-Hive: god i hate u

Jimmy Jabbers

[11:49am, Saturday]

Pineapples: anyone up for a movie night tonight?

Queen G: only if its a fun movie

RoRo: why not

Mr Grapes: absolutely!! looking through my DVDs as we speak

Four Eyes: Yeah sure, I could use a break

Pineapples: wonderful!! Pineapples: pls gather at mine at like 8 and bring ur best movie suggestion Pineapples: everyone give me money for Chinese food

Queen G: god ur cheap

Pineapples: im not made of money gina

Four Eyes: How much do you want?

Pineapples: lets call it an even $12 each

Mr Grapes: worth it for a movie night with my buds

RoRo: boyle ruined it

Skipping School Is(n’t) Cool

[08:23pm, Saturday]

Ferris: btw i liked ur movie suggestion Ferris: even if gina didnt

Cameron: Thanks :)

Dance Squad

[09:03pm, Saturday]

Charlese: they’re sitting next to each other

G-Hive: and im sitting next to rosa G-Hive: doesnt mean we’re in love with each other

Charlese: its gotta mean SOMETHING

Scary: it doesn’t mean shit except that there’s hardly any seating in this dorm

Charlese: you guys have no sense of romance

authors note: Fun fact: that star wars thing is literally me, i didn't know anakin was darth vader and then guessed it when i watched the movies for the first time and everyone was like "you didn't know???!!!". The motorbike one is also a direct quote from my bestie <3

I tried to be less party heavy this chapter, they do have a life outside of going to house parties but i will warn the next chapter involves a party (i am gonna tease that there's non-texting writing in it tho). Also this chapter now with added terry for one of the lovely commenters on the first chap, it isnt much but i hope u liked it!

Thanks again, i love you!! <3 next chap will be out as soon as its done!

#alice writes #jake peralta x amy santiago #jake peralta #amy santiago #gina linetti #rosa diaz #charles boyle #fluff #college!au #bisexual!jake peralta #brooklyn nine nine #b99 #multi chap #average weekly screentime

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georgiapeach30513 · 11 months ago

Note

I feel that there will be news about his acting activities soon. It's time to make new movies.😌

Me too! lol at people who kept saying he’s a flop and won’t get hired again 😒

They’re just mad. He’s fine. Just wait and see. Alright guys, it’s 2:38am, it is time for me to log off 🫡 hold down the fort and don’t let the ship sink!

If you’re American, Happy Thanksgiving

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anvoo · 1 year ago

Text

07.07.2023 - Milestone

2:38am. My head's hurting a bit and I feel really warm (temperature-wise). I can't really put a finger on how I'm feeling, to be honest. It's not the greatest feeling, leaning more onto the negative side, but there's this air of complexity and depth to it.

Today is my and Cat's anniversary. I sent her a message along with a cute cat video, then later in the day asked if she wanted to talk a bit in the evening.

She replied to me, saying that today is indeed a special day, and that she really liked my message and the cat video. She wishes me well. She told me that, right now, she's not doing so great and she's drowning herself in work and such. She doesn't think that she can talk right now and that she hasn't been feeling like she has the capacity at all these days. She hopes that I understand. She told me also to not forget that I am special.

I'm happy that she likes my message and cat video, it's meant to bring a bit of a smile and happiness to her ;) I'm happy that she wishes me well, too. I always kind of saw it as a formality thing, and it sometimes can be, but when someone genuinely means it, it's a really nice and heartwarming gesture. I feel sad and sorry that she's not doing so great, and that she's feeling swamped and overwhelmed. I wish somehow that wasn't the case. I wish that I could do something to help her. There are difficulties and challenges in life, and we all got to face them. You can't make all her troubles go away, and even if you could, that might not even be a good thing! But, I think that she knows you're there for her, you know. Through all your messages and actions, I think she knows that you're on her side and that she has your support and care, and it means a lot to her (you know this :>). I think so, yeah. She knows that I'm with her, and I know that she's with me also! I believe in Cat, and that she can do well. I like how she believes in me and us; it's really romantic and precious. I'm happy that my support and care mean a lot to her, it makes me feel really valued and appreciated. I understand and I know her well. I really do. It's ok;) I'm with her no matter what. I won't forget that I am special to her. She's reassuring me that even during difficult times, I am still special to her.

2x "I'm happy", 1x "I'm sad and feel sorry for Cat", 1x "I understand and know her well", 1x "I won't forget that I am special to her".

I haven't been doing great recently either. I was in a bit of a rut before, and then COVID took me out of commission for like a week, so that messed with my mental well-being even further. With a lot of time on my hands, I overthought a lot of things and made myself upset cause of it. Piled on top of that are my other challenges and things I want to do, and all of that just ended up leaving me feeling overwhelmed. I want to approach this in a different way!

I have difficulties and challenges that I'm facing right now, and in some moments I wish I could just escape it all and make it all go away. But I know that that's not really possible, and I don't think that's what I would want for myself in the long run either. I think that I'll do fine, it's just a bit bumpy right now. Some of the things I think about Cat, I should remind myself that she feels and thinks about me like that too. She believes in me, that I can do well. I'm grateful for her support and that she's on my side. There are just challenges that I am dealing with right now, but I will handle them ok.

Me focusing on my own things and doing well with them is the best thing I could do for myself, and also for Cat and our relationship right now. I want to be a positive impact on those I care about, and I want stability in my future.

I do care about her, I really do. I want to be kind, caring, and understanding, but sometimes my own personal struggles and challenges get in the way. The best thing I can do right now, and the way I can show my feelings for her, is to work on those challenges and myself! The time right now that I am dedicating to personal growth is precious and important, and I know it'll help us build a great foundation later. I love her, and I'm special to her. I won't forget that! She does care about me. She really does. She wants to be kind, caring, and understanding, but sometimes her own personal struggles and challenges get in the way. The best thing she can do right now, and the way she can show her feelings for me, is to work on those challenges and herself! The time right now that she is dedicating to personal growth is precious and important, and she knows it'll help us build a great foundation later. She loves me, and she's special to me. She won't forget that!

Get some sleep man. You deserve it.

Thank you. Goodnight!

Goodnight!

#journal #diary #motivation #thoughts #self love #self help #abstract #art #writing #milestone #love

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skinni-girls-eat-books · 9 months ago

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Friday, January 26th, 2024!

12:38am busted a nut and it felt great, awesome way to start the day lol. Also so glad I deleted the emails, I don't even remember what they said and soon they will be totally forgotten :) I already feel more at peace.

10:26am still feeling better, haven't heard from him day #2 (new record!) I want to get away from him he's toxic and doesn't know it/ believe me/ won't do anything about it. Just worry about me lol.

10:47am there's nothing wrong with doing things with your own company btw. Just be safe and you're literally fine ❤️

10:58am FUCK I jinxed myself what the hell 😂 retarded ass I told him I miss him (as a friend) and he said thanks that makes me feel better.... 😑 Glad you feel better bro (no shit I never did anything to you too make your feel bad RIP) literally what? I can't.

4:02pm had some lunch earlier and took a 3? Hr nap very needed, sleep is important!! And I only had like 4-5hrs last night so this makes sense!! I am a girl who needs lots of sleep especially when I am wanting to achieve my best mental health!! Do not feel guilty that you slept in the middle of the day you needed rest!! I love you ❤️

5:18pm laundry in the wash, trash taken out and I'm going to pick up BC RX. I love summer and warm weather but I have to be ok with sweating lol!

Pros >>> cons :) of going outside

11:15pm oops got drunk and watched too many relationship videos = bad. My heart hurts. I want him to feel pain. I fucking hate him and I want him to know (mmmmm maybe this is what I'm manifesting/ loa??) Fuck him fuck him fuck him I hope he gets fucking cheated on ong stupid prick narcissist. Fuck you you're no longer in my life fuck you and your small dick frfr.

I am a beautiful person, with a heart and soul that would NEVER do that shit to someone and that's why I know I'm fucking better. Someone with empathy, with half a brain, would not do that to another human being especially one they've known for years. I know I'm better, kinder, more loving, more respectful, more empathetic, more genuine and real AF, smarter with more emotional intelligence, more confident in myself not to need some half-ass bitch in my life, I'm going to get farther in life than he can even dream of, I get bitches on days I don't even shower bro, I have bitches hitting me up fucking constantly since you left and literally all their dicks have literally been bigger and fatter than yours and they've all been nicer more straight forward at least tbh 😂 bitch you are the bottom of the barrel and I'm the cream of the crop you could not pull me now with your little bitch ass bro wtf so fucking unconfident and with so much mental baggage and mommy and daddy issues the only flex you have is your physical body that's literally so sad and I will fucking stand on this shit, if you only pride yourself on physical appearance and ability but have nothing psychological or emotional or financial or support to provide,,, you're literally a walking dildo I'm sorry but literally please fix your fucking mental before you come at me!!!! I said what I said and I have felt this way for a while, kinda like a woman just being a fleshlight with no emotional or intellectual contribution to the relationship JFC I CAN'T it does go both ways for men and women.

Y'all are so immature and I am above you both I said what I said my confidence scares both of you coward bitches and I will get so much farther in life than the both of you combined x2 I stg because I know my mf worth and I know what and who will not take up my mf time and space. Y'all are so peabrained and act like fucking high schoolers, there's really no point in talking to y'all either bc of the stereo effect with y'all just tell each other what the other wants to hear, enabling the never ending shitty ass behavior with your insane mentally and morally wrong ways of justifying your actions. Nonsensical which is WHY it's so confusing to people who follow LOGICAL thinking..... That cognitive dissonance is the star of the shit show.

Fuck you and good riddance, can't wait for my birthday to know true fucking peace of mind. ❤️

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ocisugovorile · 1 year ago

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02:38am 19th November 2023

I cannot be upset with you, you had every right. I gave you oppurtunity. I willingly gave you myself, even if that was not my intention in the beginning, even if your words and your actions brought me to this moment, i decided to put my walls down, i decided to trust, i decided to risk. I gave you the right. You had a choice. Even though you gave me recognition to believe your choice would be me, in the end it was her. Why did you come to me? Why did you choose me at my most scarred and vulnerable period in my life. How could you ?. Im not mad at you, im mad at myself. Im dissapointed because i truly believed you wouldnt do this to me. I truly believed you and i believed you wouldnt hurt me. But you did. When i was at my worst, you hurt me. YOU. I wouldve given 2 lives to say it wouldnt be YOU, but in the end it was you.

Thats what burns me. Burns me every morning when i wake up and every night before i go to sleep. I am so grateful for my self respect that i would never allow you to do this to me again, even though every inch of me would run back to you in a second, and even when i see you my whole body shakes and my mind goes fuzzy and all i can think about is you, i wont let you get to me again, i just need to get over you first. I need to not feel you anymore. And when i dont i will be fine but for now, sto dalje od mene.

- MP

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keefwho · 1 year ago

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September 03 - 2023 Sunday

8:31 am

I am such a huge failure. I didn't go to town today because I'm a weak loser. I feel like I can't show my face around anyone today. I should have just canceled the groceries instead of enabling my own poor behavior. I didn't have a good reason to not go today. Other than feeling extremely depressed, I am fine. Now I plan to not leave my bed unless I know I want to do something for a good reason.

9:38am

I can't remember the last time I hated myself so much. I literally can't do anything right now. I never get like this. I can't pursue anything I "enjoy" because it would be a waste of time and I don't deserve the joy. I can't do something productive for others because it would be wrong of me to pretend like I have the energy for that right now. I am stuck rotting.

I'm proving to myself that my life means nothing and I'm going nowhere. That I don't have the energy to change or hold onto the things I have, like I even deserve them. That there really is nowhere to go but down so what's the point in even trying. If it was possible I'd just will my heart to stop beating.

I feel like apologizing to everyone I've let down and led on. Wasting their time making them think I'm someone worth having around. I'm so selfish

10:25am

Everyone has better things going on in their lives that don't involve me, thats always the case. But look at me being selfish enough to want anyone's attention. I should just die already

12:59pm

I feel like I can't do anything without causing damage in some way.

1:33pm

Everyone I talk to seems to have had a good weekend. While I'm rotting away hoping I can finally die

3:03pm

I'm having the thought that I just can't have certain things. I see anyone doing literally anything happy and fulfilling and I think "that could never be me." "Im just some loser stuck in this cabin doomed to be sad and alone until I die." I hold the core belief that it's impossible for me to find peace, or love, or satisfaction anywhere. I can't be a valued member of a group. I can't be someone who accepts the affection of someone else. I can't be someone who feels like he contributes to the world. I can't be with the same reverence I view others with. I can't even be someone who finds peace with himself, enjoying my alone time.

4:11pm

I hate having to be the one to message first so often. Why am I not fought for. I fight so much. Or maybe I just don't see it because I don't want to.

I definitely hate asking for emotional support because I want to make sure I'm not a drain on other people or that Im misusing them. But sometimes I just rot waiting for anyone to notice/care which doesn't happen. And all I need to do is reach out.

4:46pm

1.What are the major changes you’d like to make in your life?

I want to change how I act and perceive things so that I can stop being someone who assumes the worst of himself. I also want to learn how to drive and become more independent so maybe I can fit in more with my peers. Changing living situation would be a big next step, being truly on my own.

2. How would you act differently if painful thoughts and feelings were no longer an obstacle?

I would be able to act on my decisions rather than sulking so much. I'd be able to operate without distraction.

3. What projects or activities would you start or continue if your time and energy were not consumed by troublesome emotions?

I have so many creative ideas I'd like to do that feel like they are locked behind learning to overcome my thoughts. Not only that but I'd want to make a better effort to get integrated into a friend group or two. I want to play VRchat like I used to where every weekend night felt like a party no matter who I was with, even strangers. I want to be better overall about being active online instead of doing things alone so much.

4. What would you do if fear were no longer an issue?

I would go to town to get my own groceries without it being such a big issue. I'd meet up with someone IRL like my gradeschool friend who reached out but I didn't do anything with. I'd try to get to a con to meet my online friends. I'd join group activities more without worrying about my mood, knowing it's something that would benefit me.

If unhelpful thoughts and unpleasant feelings did not deter you: 5. What sort of relationships would you build and with whom?

First and foremost I'd stabilize things with my bestie as much as possible. Thats the most important relationship to me right now and I want it to be a very healthy one. I want to make more friends in general that I actually care about and want to put my time into. I want relationships that I don't worry about so I can actually maintain multiple. It could be nice to have an art buddy of sorts to draw with on a frequent basis.

6. What improvements would you make in your health and fitness?

I'd stick to my workout schedule better but overall I don't think I'm that unhealthy of a person. There's always room for improvement but I just want to make sure I have something going that is okay and stable which I almost do.

7. What changes would you make in your work?

I'd stick to my schedule extremely well before trying to expand it more. I'd be less afraid and more willing to work on things that might grow my name/business at the cost of being things I might not be super into. But usually it's about the art process more than the content for me. I'd stop skimping out on work just because I am "able" and push myself more.

What feelings, urges and sensations might possibly act as obstacles?

Feelings of loneliness and inadequacy. Feelings that make me believe I am not worth the things I want. Urges to quit or cope self destruct. Sensations that remind me of my fears like an upset stomach or that empty feeling in my chest when I feel like none of it is worth it.

What thoughts and images might possibly act as obstacles?

The thoughts that I can't sustain friends or find out what I really want in life. Images of myself alone, unhappy, or dead. Images of myself in a place remembering how I fucked it all up and can never move on to something better. Knowing it was actually all my fault.

7:25pm

I feel so selfish expecting literally anyone to prioritize me or help when I need it. I really don't deserve it but I expect it anyways. How can I be such a bad person

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torreshalstead · 2 years ago

Text

20 hours

First fic for One Chicago Appreciation Week 2022 and Burzek Appreciation Week 2022! AO3 link

Prompts - Chills and ‘Why won’t you let me in? What are you afraid of?’

Summary - Those 20 hours in solitary had affected Adam more than he cared to let on and he was hiding it from everyone. But he works in an elite unit so people are bound to notice.

Notes - I played around with the timelines a bit but it’s set after the Season 2 episode ‘Prison Ball’ but includes elements of Season 5 as Hailey is present

Adam woke with a start. Breathing heavily, he ran his hands over his face in an attempt to wipe the sweat away, cool the chills and calm himself down. It had been 5 days since those 20 hours and he hadn’t slept through the night once. He looked to his right and breathed a sigh of relief to see Kim still sleeping soundly, curled on her side. At least he hadn’t woken her up he thought as he looked over at the clock. 3:38am. The earliest he could get into the bullpen without arising suspicion was 6, any earlier and people would start asking questions and this was not something he wanted to talk about.

Getting out of bed quietly so as not to wake his sleeping girlfriend, he walked into the kitchen. Coffee, that would ensure he stayed awake for the rest of the day and no one would know any different. Whilst waiting for the coffee machine to finish, he looked around. His once manly bachelor pad now bore signs of someone in a happy relationship. There were pictures on the fridge, cushions on the sofa, that Adam had no idea how they got there, and two glasses with the dregs of last night’s wine on the coffee table. Adam smiled to himself, even with everything going on in his head right now he still had her. She was the love of his life, for that he was sure and he knew he had to get over this, for her sake if not for his own.

-------

Dragging himself into the precinct at 6am was not what he had planned today yet here he was. He went straight into the break room to make another cup of coffee, it was going to be a long day. His phone chimed shortly after he returned to his desk – it was a picture of the note he had left Kim on her mug and a message saying I love you too. A small grin crept across his face.

‘What’s got you smiling like a fool’ came Kevin’s voice. Adam had been so preoccupied that he hadn’t even noticed him coming up the stairs.

‘Nothing’ Adam said.

‘Yeah nothing to rhyme with Burgess’ Kevin smirked.

If there was one person who understood the relationship he had with Kim, it was Kevin. The two hadn’t necessarily gotten off to the best start in relation to her but now Adam understood that he was only looking out for her, and he appreciated someone else having her back.

-------

By the time lunch came around, Adam was on his fourth cup of coffee and people were starting to notice his irritable behaviour. He had snapped at Jay when Jay asked what was wrong. Had barked orders at Hailey even though she outranked him. Al had called him out for zoning out during their meeting and Voight, well Voight could tell something was up.

‘Ruzek’, the gruff voice of their Sergeant said, ‘my office, now’. Adam groaned internally, getting called to the Boss’s office was never good news and he knew after the way he was behaving today, it definitely wasn’t.

‘Sarge’ he said when he entered the room and closed the door behind him.

‘You going to tell me what’s going on or do I have to drag Burgess up here and hear it from her’. Oh, great Adam thought, he thinks it’s my relationship that’s getting in the way of the job, whereas the relationship was the only thing keeping him afloat right now.

‘It’s nothing Sarge, and it’s got nothing to do with Kim, she’s great, I mean we’re fine. I just…’, he took a breath, ‘haven’t been sleeping great, think I just need a new pillow is all’ he said with a chuckle. Voight didn’t look convinced.

‘If that’s all, close the door on your way out’.

‘That’s all Sarge, I’m good’. And with that, he left Voight’s office and headed straight to the locker room. He sat down on the bench and put his head in his hands, I’ve got to get over this he thought. If not I’m out of intelligence and that can’t happen. Just as he was trying to pull himself together, he heard a voice.

‘Adam, hey, what’s up?’ He looked up to see Kim walk in, she looked concerned. ‘You didn’t text back this morning, I just wanted to check you’re alright. You’ve been gone every morning this week before I wake up’.

Adam rubbed his face, ‘I’m all good darlin’’ he said with his signature grin, ‘just had paperwork to catch up on’. And with that, he got up, quickly pecked her on the cheek and headed back to the bullpen, leaving a very confused and worried Kim in his wake.

-------

Adam was the last to leave the bullpen that evening and once he thought he was alone he headed back into the locker room. He knew Kim had gone home earlier; she had text him to say she was going to cook if he was home before 7. It was now 9 and he had shot her a message back to say the team had to stay late. In reality, Voight had a meeting in the Ivory tower at 5 and the rest of the team apart from him and Jay had left before 6. Jay had headed out a little while ago and he had just been staring at the screen until he thought he was alone. He knew Kim would probably be in bed by the time he got home which meant he could hopefully avoid the conversation he knew was coming.

When he got to the locker room however he saw that he wasn’t alone. Jay was sat on the bench waiting for him.

‘Ruze, talk to me man’.

‘It’s nothing Jay really, I’ve just not been sleeping, need a new pillow, you know the story’. He tried to play it off but he could see Jay wasn’t believing him.

‘That’s not it though is it’, Jay said in a slow calm voice. ‘You’ve been like this ever since that UC case. The one in the prison’.

Adam bristled, he wanted to say something, anything to deflect what Jay was saying but he couldn’t get the words out.

‘Going into the hole must have been hell man, I’ve heard the stories. It’s normal that it would have affected you. Hell, you’d be crazy if you didn’t get torn up over what you saw.’

Adam sat down facing his locker, not wanting to see Jay’s face.

‘I’ve seen the look in your eyes before’, Jay took a deep breath, ‘I’ve had that look in my eyes too. When every time you close them your back somewhere that broke you. It’s normal but you’ve got to get some help man. Have you told anyone the real reason you’re not sleeping?’ Adam shook his head. ‘Not even Burgess?’.

Adam scoffed. ‘What do I tell her? Hey Kim, you know your big strong cop boyfriend who’s not afraid of bullets. Well he got locked in a room for 20 hours and went almost crazy and now he can’t sleep because he keeps having nightmares.’

Jay looked at him slowly, ‘yes’ he said simply. ‘Tell her and she’ll be there for you. Hell that girl is crazy about you and heaven knows why’. He chuckled quietly. ‘You’ve got PTSD Adam, at least on some level’ he said as Adam looked at him and tried to interrupt. ‘20 hours locked in a room with no windows, hearing sounds of other prisoners going crazy, not knowing when you were going to get out. That’s a lot for anyone to take. Even a big strong cop’. He said with a smile. ‘I’ve known men bigger and stronger than you, crack under a lot less’.

‘But that’s different’ Adam said.

‘Why, because it was war. Men are men Adam, in prison, on the streets or on the battlefield. It doesn’t mean what we see or hear doesn’t affect us. You should talk to someone. When I had all that stuff with Morgan, therapy got me through it. Well therapy and Upton.’

Adam looked up at him with a curious expression.

‘Yeah, she basically told me if I didn’t go to therapy and start dealing with it, she was going to ask for another partner’.

‘Damn, for someone so small, she’s feisty’. Smirked Adam, Jay nodded and laughed.

‘She is, but it took that for me to realise that me not dealing with it wasn’t just effecting me. It was having an impact on those around me, those I care about.’

‘But therapy’ Adam said, ‘talking to someone about my feelings and crap, not sure that’s for me.’

‘I didn’t think it was for me either, thought I’d be weak if I went to see someone but it helped. It really did. But start with talking to Kim, she knows somethings up. We all do. And she might surprise you.’

With that Jay patted him on the shoulder and headed out leaving Adam with a lot to think about.

-------

Adam took a breath before opening the door to his apartment. She loved him, he thought to himself, she loved him.

As he walked in, Kim turned her head to see him from where she was sat on the couch. ‘You’re home late’, she said. It wasn’t said in an accusatory tone, it was laced with something else, worry, perhaps.

Adam took of his jacket and draped it over a chair before making his way to sit next to her.

‘Talk to me Adam’, Kim said softly as she took his hands in hers. ‘Why can’t you let me in? What are you so afraid of?’.

This was it thought Adam, this is the moment I might lose her. And with that he started talking. Once he had opened the flood gates, it didn’t seem like he’d ever stop.

He told her how he hadn’t been sleeping because every night it felt like he was lying on that hard slab and all he could hear was the shouts coming from the neighbouring cells. He told her how he felt like he’d been in that room for days and when it turned out it was only 20 hours he was ashamed of how he felt. He told her when Kevin seemed fine straight afterwards that he must be weak for acting the way he was. He told her that he didn’t want her to think less of him because he was having nightmares so he made sure she fell asleep before he even dared to close his eyes. He told her how Jay had cornered him this evening and told him to talk to her and that maybe he should get some therapy. He told her how he had scoffed at the idea because good cops don’t need therapy. He told her how the reason he hadn’t told her any of this was because he was scared. He was scared she would look at him with pity, scared that she would think he was weak, scared that she’d leave him.

All through this, Kim watched him whilst he talked, holding his hands but never interrupting. She knew he had to get it all out and when it seemed like he had finished, she gently squeezed his hand and he looked at her.

But it wasn’t a look of pity that Adam saw, it was a look of love, a look of pride.

‘It took a lot to tell me all that Adam’, Kim smiled, ‘I always thought you were the strongest man I’d ever met’. Adam heard the past tense and looked away. Kim squeezed his hand again and he looked back. ‘But now I realise that you’re stronger than I ever thought and I love you more because of it.’

Adam had tears in his eyes and let out a weak laugh.

‘And we will get through this together, and if you want to go to talk to someone then…’. Adam interrupted her, ‘I do’ he said. ‘I think it’ll help’. She smiled, ‘then I will drive you to the appointments and wait until you’re finished. Then we can come home together, and talk about it, or not if that’s what you want, but we will do it together.’

Adam’s smile became even larger as he wrapped her into a hug and gently squeezed. How did I get to be so lucky he thought as he held the woman of his dreams and realised that tonight, he might actually get to sleep through the night, for the first time since that hideous day.

#one Chicago appreciation week #ocaw22 #Burzek appreciation week #burzekaw22 #Burzek #Chicago pd #one Chicago #one Chicago week #onechicagoweek #dailyburzek

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mindninjax · 3 years ago

Text

Awake

Bakugo x Reader (duh)

wc: 1.7k

A/n: Had a full on mental breakdown yesterday. Tried to sleep tonight. Couldn’t. Wrote this instead. I listened to Rain Clouds by The Arcadian Wolf while writing it and it’s the song that’s referenced in this. I could link it but I’m lazy and depressed so I’m not gonna *dabs sadly*. Anyway here’s a comfort Fic I guess.?

Bakugo: Hey

(2:38AM): uh…hey?

Bakugo: You up?

(2:39 AM): clearly… clearly I’m up Bakugo. Why are you?

Bakugo: Can't sleep.

(2:39 AM): oh. I’m sorry.

Bakugo: Come outside?

(2:40 AM): like outside outside?

Bakugo: What other outside would there fucking be?

(2:41 AM): don’t curse at me stupid. I meant the balcony? Or are we going for a walk or something?

Bakugo: Fine. Nevermind. Forget I asked.

…

Bakugo: Balcony.

(2:52 AM): gimme five to put on pants.

Bakugo: Ok

(2:52 AM): folk or classical?

Bakugo: Ugh neither.

(2:53 AM): neither wasn’t an option shit head. Pick one.

Bakugo: Whatever you played last time. It helped me feel far away.

(2:54AM): Folk it is.

You put your phone down, the light dying and drawing you back into the darkness of your room. It’s quiet, you can hear him rustling on the other side of the wall, hear the balcony door slide open in his apartment next door and then shut.

You sit in bed for a moment, your heart the only thing thrumming in your ears as you take a deep breath. The city is quiet for the first time in a long time. There are no cars on the street, no sirens, just the sleepy lazy sound of the wind blowing and alley cats slinking through the garbage filled alleyways.

Then you get up, grab a pair of sweatpants and exchange the large holey t-shirt you’re wearing for a comfy but secure cami top. You search around your room for the little Bluetooth speaker and pause when your eyes fall on your acoustic guitar. You smile to yourself, it's perfect. You’ve been thinking about the song, the chords should be easy enough to grasp, and the words have been drifting around your head for days now.

You grab your phone to send him another quick text.

(2:58AM): Change of plans. The roof.

He doesn’t hesitate.

Bakugo: Ok.

He’s up on the roof of your city apartment building before you are, gazing out at the city lights , the moon in the sky blazing white shimmering light through his ash blond locks. He doesn’t turn around or acknowledge your presence when you land delicately on your toes and deactivate your air quirk. He’s wearing a red tank top, must’ve had to change out of the usual black one he wears to bed from all the sweat. His shoulders look broad and you can see the scars rippling down the muscles of his arms.

“Took you long enough, even with your floaty little air quirk,” he taunts, back still to you.

“And yet you’re still here,” you quip back, rolling your eyes and grabbing a crate to sit on. You pull another over and plop it down across from you the same time he turns to join you on the other crate. He has dark circles under his eyes, there’s still a gleam of sweat shimmering on his jaw and neck. He watches in anticipation as you ready the guitar on your leg and hook your arm over it, expert fingers finding the correct chords to strum a lovely tune.

“What’s the occasion?” he asks, gesturing to the guitar. You smile down at the guitar, concentrating on the correct note in your mind to start the song.

“It’s a nice night,” you murmur, eyes still focused on the instrument on your lap.

The muttered “It is now,” is swallowed by the sound of you strumming the strings softly diving into the tune as you rock back and forth. You close your eyes and hear Bakugo take a deep calming breath in and out before you start singing the lyrics.

I'm being frightened by the people

They look at me like I'm a scar upon their perfect skin

Perfect to only them

I'm being shadowed by my past

Reminding me of what I was and what I could become

My sins should stay where they belong

The wind is blowing gently and you can smell Bakugo’s sweet scent on the breeze. His crisp pine scented body wash mixes with his smoky sweet scent and it almost feels like the two of you are sitting around a campfire. Your voice drifts dreamily over the lyrics, enunciating the words and basking in the ease of the notes while putting your own lovely spin on it.

Listen to my voice

Close your frightened eyes

Hide behind my love for you

Fear's only a choice

One that we all must make some day

So know you're not alone in this

It’s clear and strong like a bell, punctuating every phrase with meaning that sits in Bakugo’s core and makes his heart do that weird thing where it’s fluttering but also extremely tranquil at the same time. When you end the song and finally open your eyes, he’s looking at you incredulously.

“How do you do that?”

“Hmm?” you say, placing the guitar against a huge wooden pallet gently.

“How do you fucking do that? Every time. It’s fucking creepy.”

“You mind elaborating, dummy? I’m not a mind reader.”

“Coulda fooled me,” he grunts, rolls his eyes and folds his arms, pouting.

You roll your eyes before chuckling and answer the question you already know he’s asking. “Somewhere out there. Someone has made a song for every feeling you’ve ever felt. So I won’t take credit for that.”

“But you show them to me.”

“Yes,” you say this as if it’s an obvious statement.

“And play them for me.”

“Yes.” Again, another obvious statement. Why wouldn’t you play them for him. It’s why the two of you are here. Right?

“And make them….ya know… sound good and shit,” he says, stuttering over the words as his cheeks and ears start to turn pink.

You smirk, “You can say I sound pretty. I won’t tell anyone you said it,” you tease.

“Tch. Idiot.”

There’s a beat of silence, you’re lost in your thoughts staring up at the starry sky before you look at him again.

“Can I ask you something?”

“You’re going to even if I say no.”

“Correct. Why do you text me when it happens? Why me?”

He shrugs his shoulders, looks away sheepishly and doesn’t meet your questioning gaze. "Don't know.”

You raise a suspicious eyebrow, “Yes you do”

He sighs, holds out a hand to gesture as if it’s obvious. Why would you be asking this? Especially after the many nights the two of you have done this. “Just feels right I guess. And after we talk I can go back to sleep just fine.”

“You realize what that is right?” You lean in closer to him, elbows on your thighs, chin in your hands. “That’s called trusting someone.”

“Sure I guess.”

Another beat of silence and then a long winded sigh from you, one that definitely says “I’m tired of this” and it makes a shiver of fear run up his spine.

“Look Bakugo. I’m not usually one that skates around feelings. And as much as I enjoy late night jam sessions or sneaking out and gazing at the moon with you until you feel ok enough to sleep, I…”

He holds his breath, “What?”

“Hmm…” you have a finger up to your chin in the universal thinking pose.

His heartbeat picks up and his fingers start to fiddle in the pocket of his sweatpants. “Fucking what? You just said you don’t skate around feelings so what?”

You frown at him, “Hold your flippin’ horses I’m thinkin’ first.”

“‘Flippin’ horses?’ You’re such a weirdo.”

And now you’re glaring. "Speaking of thinking before speaking. You should try it.”

“Fuck you.” There’s no hostility to it and he knows you know it.

“Very original. ANYWAY, I was going to say despite your constant attitude and constant shouting, I still really like hanging out with you. So I’d like to not only hang out at…”you pull your phone from your pocket and gaze at the tiny blue screen, “4 AM”

Another pause as he processes his elation. He’s happy you’re not telling him this is the last time. But this isn’t the hard part. “Ok.”

You squint suspiciously. “I mean it.”

“So do I.”

“Then say it aloud to me,” you challenge.

This is the hard part.

He takes a few deep breaths and then… “I don’t wanna be just friends with you. I don’t know what any of that shit even means. All the stupid lovey dovey shit Raccoon Ey-”

“Ashido.”

It’s his turn to glare. “Fine, Ashido talks about all the time. All I know is no one talks to me the way you do. And I always feel calm around you. Calmer than usual. I always wanna hang out more with the idiots when you’re around to hang out with them too.”

You smile but hide it behind your fingertips. He doesn’t look finished so you nod to encourage him to finish.

“And I don't know what it is. But whenever I wake up from the fucking …” He doesn’t say the word “nightmare”. He struggles with it like if he says it he’s surrendering to weakness or something. “Whenever I wake up the only thing I think of is you. Wishing you were there, like a fucking idiot. But it never goes away, not until I text you and I see you and I hear your voice.” His head is in his hands, like he’s ashamed to admit this to you.

It’s quiet again, some cars from below have started bustling on the street. The morning wind carries his scent and the city's waking smells of coffee and fresh baked bread. You stand quietly and walk over to him, head still hanging in his hands as he crouches over on the crate.

You hug him, force yourself between his legs and wrap your arms around his head. And at first he stiffens but he doesn’t pull away from you or move out of your grasp. He just sits there with his arms hanging limply at his sides,eyes wide, and your arms wrapped around his head. His ear is pressed against your chest, listening to the city waking around you. You're warm and you smell impossibly good and he knows this is what he craves when he wakes up from those terrifying nightmares. Your embrace is the cure.

“I like being here. I like being there for you.”

Then his arms move up to wrap around your waist and he hugs you back and sighs into your chest. He stays there for at least 10 minutes listening to the steady beating of your heart.

And then he quietly mutters, “Thanks.”

#bakugo x reader #bakugou x reader #marquie writes #yea it’s unedited #I just told y’all I was depressed #sheesh #idk what I’m doing anymore #I’m numb and empty 🙃

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kuroyorusimpdom · 3 years ago

Text

Harbinger

*Part 2*

Minors DNI | NSFW | Smut / Lemon |

Pairings: Aizawa Shouta x OC, Bakugou Katsuki x OC, Hitoshi Shinsou x OC

Dom/Sub, Pegging, Orgasm Denial, Aged up, Post Cannon

Word Count: 5.2K

[3:37am] Idiot (Sexy): Well, my relief came earlier than expected. You still awake, or should I head home?

[3:38am] Boom Boy: I’m up

[3:38am] Boom Boy: Get your fine ass over here so I can fucking ruin you

[3:41am] Idiot (Sexy): Pretty sure the terms were set baby, and though they did involve someone being ruined, I don’t believe it was meeee ;)

[3:42am] Boom Boy: I did not agree to any shitty terms

[3:43am] Idiot (Sexy): Guess I’ll be headed home then!

[3:43am] Idiot (Sexy): Have fun with your hand, big boy

[3:44am] Boom Boy: Fuck you

[3:47am] Boom Boy: Seriously Kai. Come over.

[3:50am] Boom Boy: Kaida, I’m not fucking around. You better be on your way here

[3:59am] Boom Boy: Fucking FINE. You win. Just come over.

[4:00am] Idiot (Sexy): Aw, okay boomy, I’ll see you soon. You better be ready for me, you know how much I like it when you’re all ready to go, like a good boy. {Read 4:01am}

Kaida smirked down at her phone, re-reading the string of messages between her and Bakugou while waiting for her train. Excitement flowed in her veins. It had been too long since they were last able to get together without the parade of idiots they considered friends.

It both was, and wasn’t a shock to the entire Bakusquad when you two started doing … whatever it is you’ve been doing for the past year.

There was always a vibe between the two of you. When the first semester at UA started, Kai was the only person who wasn’t afraid to go toe to toe with the angry gremlin. Sure at first it clearly pissed him off that he couldn’t use intimidation to get her to back down, but it didn’t take long for Bakugou to see Kaida was a solid adversary. Not equal, Bakugou would never believe anyone equal to him, but definitely more interesting than all the other “extras”.

Smartass quips back and forth soon turned to casual flirting (though everyone else would definitely not consider what the two of you did as ‘flirting’). Into second year there was a class pool on when the two of you would get over yourselves and just fuck already.

Through first year and into the beginning of second, the banter between the two of you continued.Kaida most definitely developed a bit of a crush on the brash and aggressive man, however due to Bakugou being emotionally stunted he had deemed anything not related to classes or training as a waste of time on his goal to getting to number 1, Kai included. This of course was when there was no one else that held any of her attention, so he didn’t have to think too hard about his decision to not allow their dynamic to move forward. That’s when Hitoshi Shinsou made his appearance in the hero course.

Of course Kai had seen Shinsou around the school a few times, and he was impressive to have made it to the final round in the sports festival the first year considering he was in general studies, however overall, Shinsou didn’t really capture much of her attention. This in part was because she spent any of her (very limited) free time with Bakugou. When Shinsou fully entered Kais raidar, it was a seismic event.

He was hot, mysterious, quiet and 100% Kaida’s usual type. In typical Kai fashion, she found one of the only other men who thought anything outside of Hero Studies was pointless. Despite his initial insistence that he didn’t need friendship (or any other kind of relationship) Shinsou didn’t actually remain resolute with his convictions. He realized slowly that the connection with others was a help, not a hindrance and Kaida was right there when that realization did come.

_______________________________________________________________________

Mina sat cross legged in the middle of the common room floor, pouring a new round of drinks for everyone while simultaneously ushering them into a circle with her

“Okay guys! We’re playing truth or dare! No backing out, the whole class has to be involved!! You can’t pick truth twice in a row, and if you don’t want to answer or complete the dare, you can drink, but you can’t drink twice in a row either so make sure it’s worth it if you opt out!”

Mina reached out and grabbed Bakugou’s arm as he tried to leave the room, grumbling about how he ‘wouldn’t be playing a stupid game with stupid extras’

“That means everyone Bakubro” She gave him a sharp glare and yanked him down next to her.

Kaida watched as the class gathered around in a circle, Iida (in typical Iida fashion) made several statements about how everyone must be responsible and act in a way befitting to their status, only to be shut down by several people booing him loudly.

“Okay, I’ll go first” Denki stood up, slurring slightly from the already consumed drinks.

“Jirou, truth or dare babyface”

“Dare, and also, gross” Jirou rolled her eyes at the blonde,

“I dare you to sit on the lap of the most attractive person in the room” as he spoke, a sly smirk appeared on his face as he dramatically cleared space on his lap for her.

Jirou stood up, and made her way over towards where Denki sat, he looked around the circle in triumph while she simultaneously spun around and sat directly on Momo who was just to his left.

A few snickers sounded as Jirou got comfortable in her new seat, “Aw, did you think I was going to sit on you sparky?”

“Not cool man, not cool” Kaminari’s face visibility fell and Jirou pouted towards him.

“Okay, my turn!” Jirou smiled and glanced around the circle “Bakugou, truth or dare?”

“Sure as fuck not a pussy, so if I have to play this stupid game I’ll obviosuly do a dare”

“Interesting, interesting” Jirou pressed her finger to her lips in thought as Momo leaned in and whispered something in her ear “oh shit, that’s perfect!” her smile widened “Okay Bakugou, I dare you to make out with Kaida, the sexual tension you two have been carrying around since last year is suffocating, and clearly you’re not going to do anything to make her your girl without divine intervention”

Kaida could feel her face heating up. It wasn’t untrue that they had been dancing around each other for the better part of first year in a ‘will they, won’t they’ dance, but she had finally FINALLY started to think about moving on when a lilac haired man made his way into her life.. That said, she certainly was not over her crush on the blonde, and she couldn’t help but anticipate the implication of this dare, maybe it would finally mean that Bakugou would come to terms with the fact that he also felt something towards her.. He wouldn't be able to deny it once the obvious chemistry between them was turned into a physical act.

“Fuck no, I ain’t kissing no shitty fucking extras and I don't want to waste my time with any shitty fucking girlfriend. Not fucking interested” Bakugou snarled “I’d rather drink this fucking disgusting drink than kiss anyone, especially HER” he punctuated his sentence by slamming back the beer that was resting in his hand.

“Jesus bro, that was not manly, not manly at all” Kirishima scolded Bakugou , while looking over at Kaida with a sympathetic smile

Every student sucked in a breath at the outburst from the blonde, glancing at Kaida who remained stone faced despite having her heart openly crushed in front of her entire class.

She refused to allow anyone ESPECIALLY Bakugou know how much that hurt. Any hopes she had of ever having anything with Bakugou were effectively out the window.

Kaida took an almost imperceptible breath in and turned to Bakugou with a blank face “your turn to ask now, let's keep the game going”

The entire group seemed to let out an audible exhale at Kaidas reaction.

Bakugou just stared forward, anger emanating from his large frame. “Deku, truth or dare you fucking nerd”

Deku looked up, a deer in headlights “u-uh……….. Truth” he squeeked out

“Fucking pussy” Bakugou chided. “Is it true that you’re a useless fucking nerd?”

Midoriya tilted his head slightly, looking down at his hands “u-um, I’m h-honestly not sure how t-to answer '' Ururaka gently placed her hand on top of Deku’s and whispered quickly in his ear. His entire face turned beet red as she leaned away from him, “I guess, n-no is the answer” .

Mina elbowed Bakugou hard in the side as Midoriya was answering, and a few people in the circle shook their heads at the blonde. Bakugou just rolled his eyes and mumbled under his breath.

“U-um, Mina truth or dare” Midoriya quickly diverted the attention from himself to the pink haired girl across the circle.

“Truth!”

“Is it true that your boots on your hero costume are made specifically so that your acid doesn’t burn through them?” Midoriya asked, while pulling his hero notebook seemly out of nowhere to write her answer down

“What a waste of a turn Deku, I totally would have answered that for you anytime without needing to waste a precious truth question on me!! But Yes, most of my clothing has to be specially made to make sure I don’t have a serious wardrobe malfunction due to my acid” She answered while he hastily scribbled in his notebook.

“Now, let's get some dirt from the newbie!” Mina squealed “Shinsou this is your first game with us, I’m excited to see your playing style. Truth or dare?”

Hitoshi glanced over at Mina with what outwardly appeared to be little interest, “dare” his monotonous voice rang through the circle.

“Oooooh!!! I dare you to kiss the person you’re most likely to get with” Mina smiled in triumph, hoping that Shinsou wouldn’t chicken out of the dare like Bakugou had.

Shinsou glanced around the circle slowly, and stood up.

Kaida was mostly lost in herself, only putting on an outward appearance of being present in the game. She hadn’t paid any attention whatsoever to the last 3 rounds, and absolutely did not know what was currently happening as everyone else watched with bated breath when Shinsou walked around the circle. She only realized something was happening when a shadow was cast over her.

As Kai’s brain re-entered her body, she looked up to see who was standing in front of her. Her eyes had barely made it halfway up his legs when Shinsou bent down and grabbed her chin in his large hand, tilting her face up so her bright green eyes met his periwinkle ones. He leaned forward towards her, allowing his nose to brush along her own, “tell me now if you don’t want this” Shinsou whispered his hot breath trailing Kaidas lips as he brought his other hand to the back of her head, threading his fingers through her short black hair. His eyes moved from her lips, up to meet her own in question. Kaida reached her own hand up to his face, her thumb delicately tracing over his bottom lip, feeling the soft skin. Her tongue darted out of her mouth to wet her lips in anticipation and Shinsou’s eyes followed the motion. “I want this'' she whispered back, allowing herself to forget about the pain and embarrassment that Bakugou had put her through, and embrace this unexpected circumstance. The gentle admission from her was all it took for him to close the short distance between their lips in a searing kiss.

The world melted away from Kaida as she relaxed into the kiss, the hand that once caressed his face moved back to grab a handful of his soft hair as she pulled herself flush against him. His tongue tentatively met her lips,a silent request, which was swiftly granted. Their tongues fought for dominance, lips moving in tandem as the kiss deepened. His hand moved from her chin down to her waist as he squeezed gently. Kaida couldn’t hold in the gentle moan that his mouth quickly swallowed.

Wide eyes watched the pair for absolutely too long to be appropriate, no one being able to find their voice to remind them that they were in a room full of classmates.

It took the audible slamming of a door for the two to jump apart from each other, suddenly remembering their surroundings. Kaida blushed heavily while Shinsou simply leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss behind her ear and whispered gently

“Let's get out of here and find somewhere with less of an audience” his hand still on her hip guiding her to stand up.

The pair said nothing as they walked out of the common room in search of a more private location.

“Uhhhhhhhhhhhh. That was fucking hot” Mina was the first to speak up after 18 sets of eyes followed the two out of the room

“Not everyone seems to think so” Kirishima motioned to the empty spot where Bakugou had been previously seated

“Whatever, it’s his own fault he’s missing out on his chance with her. You heard what he said, it was pretty savage” Jirou shook her head as she shut down any pity Bakugou may have garnered from having to witness the kiss.

Kirishima looked sad “Bakubro just doesn’t know how to express his feelings..” he started “We all know he has feelings for Kai”

“Yeah but that doesn’t mean she’s going to wait around for him to stop being an idiot, she’s hot and super talented, one of the strongest in the class. He shouldn’t assume she’ll always be around pining after him” Jirou looked down the hallway after Sinsou and Kiada “and it seems to me like he just lost his chance”.

______________________________________________________________________

Kaida and Hitoshi’s relationship burned hot after that night. After Kaida walked out of Shinsou’s room the following morning, they were officially a couple. They stayed together for the remainder of the time at UA, and even ended up at the same agency straight out of school. 4 years together, an apartment, 2 cats, and a plan for the future.

Unfortunately for Kaida, even the best laid plans can go awry.

Shortly after the pair celebrated their 4 year anniversary Kai started rising in the ranks despite her not being in the public eye. This created some friction in their relationship, Hitoshi hadn’t cracked the top 100, and rather than being happy for Kai’s success, he wallowed in his failure.

As the weeks passed by, Kai could feel Hitoshi pulling away from her. His usually stoic and emotionless demeanor held with everyone else started to become a regular at home. The small things that he used to do to show love to Kai all but disappeared, and all of his free time was spent ‘out’.

It got so bad that the pair didn’t see each other at all for 2 weeks. Shinsou had requested to switch to the day shift rather than working at night like they always had, it kept his evenings free to go out and not bother coming home. On the rare occasion that he did come home, he rolled in after 2am and went straight to bed, only to sleep in until he got up and left for work in the morning.

Kaida watched the slow deterioration of her relationship. Of course in the beginning she made efforts to fix the cracks, but it was clear that there was nothing she could do. His resentment over her success created such a chasmic rift between them. The rift allowed him to become jealous and possessive while at the same time completely pull away from her. He would lose his mind whenever she went out to her bi-weekly Bakusquad hangouts (something that had been happening regularly since graduation) and try to tell her that she shouldn’t be out with anyone who wasn’t him. In a few short months Hitoshi somehow became suffocating, yet completely absent.

The last straw was finding lipstick that did not belong to her on his capture weapon and hero uniform.

_______________________________________________________________________

Kai had been sitting in the same spot at the kitchen table in their shared apartment for several hours. Long enough for the bottle of wine she opened to be finished, and for the tears that had streaked her face to dry. It would have been in Shinsou’s best interest to show up earlier than 4am however luck was not on his side, and no longer was Kai sad, now she was just fucking mad.

The pregnant silence in the apartment was broken by the sound of a keys jingling and the door being unlocked.

Kai glanced at the clock on the stove

4:07am

Hitoshi removed his shoes and walked into the living room, Kaida’s eyes tracked him the entire way before speaking.

“What in the actual fuck Hitoshi” her tone was cold, her eyes displaying no emotion.

“Jesus christ Kai its late, why are you sitting at the kitchen table like a serial killer?” His eyes cut to her still form, sitting with her arms crossed over the table.

“I don’t know, why don’t you tell me” She remained still, only lifting a hand to gesture to the empty chair in front of her

He made his way to the chair and stood above it, taking in her calculating stare, “How would I know?”

“Well Hitoshi” This was the second time she had used his surname, something she had not done since second year in highschool “is there anything you need to tell me?”

He glanced toward the window, considering how to respond, “no, I don’t think so. Did I forget to pay a bill or something?” he glanced up at her briefly and their eyes locked

“Or something”

Kaida knew now that it was over. She gave him the out. The opportunity to come clean to her, to tell her it was a mistake, it was only one time, he still loved her, ANYTHING.

But he didn’t

He chose to stand in front of her, and lie.

She looked him dead in the eyes, searching desperately for a piece of the man she fell in love with. The man she had planned her future with.

“Last chance Hitoshi”

He didn’t move, he didn’t speak, he stood behind the chair at their table and said nothing.

Kaida stood up from the table slowly, sliding the packed bags out with her.

“What’s with the bags Kai?” Hitoshi glanced from her bags up to her face

Kaida kept the emotion from her face and answered him clearly and with confidence “I’m done Hitoshi. I’m leaving.”

This at least elicited some kind of response from him.

“What?” he asked, his mask of nonchalance slipped off his face as he stepped out from behind the table, reaching out to her for the first time in 3 weeks “What do you mean you’re leaving? Why would you leave? This is our home”.

“Don’t treat me like a fucking idiot” Kaidas tone was sharp, her words cutting, “You and I both know why I’m leaving, and we both know that this has not been a home in a long time” she picked up the bags in one hand and her jacket in the other “I will not stand around while you feel sorry for yourself and take it out on me Hitoshi.” she moved towards the door as she spoke, “I know my worth, and you’re going to realize very soon that nothing you find in a bar or hanging around waiting to have 5 minutes of fame with a hero” she stared into his eyes, the rage simmering beneath her skin, “nothing and no one you bring into your sad, miserable life will ever compare to me and what we had that you threw away”.

Hitoshi’s face fell.

The reality of what he had done hit him HARD in the face.

The months of pulling away from you, blaming you for your success, the desperate fans he used to make himself feel like he was worth something, every single night he spent away from home, away from you, it all came rushing to him at once.

“Please Kai, don’t go” His voice cracked

She was leaving.

His future was about to walk out the door and it was entirely his fault.

Hitoshi’s eyes followed Kaida as she reached the door, “ Please, I can fix this, I’m so sorry” his emotions swirled to the surface displaying on his face, “please give me the chance to fix this. You’re my future, I love you, I’ve always loved you” he stepped forward, towards the door “There will never be anyone like you, you’re all I want” his voice pleaded with her. He closed the remaining distance between them, arms outstretched, eyes full of sorrow.

Kaida’s hand raised to stop him before he reached where she was standing, “You really should have thought of all this before Hitoshi” Kai's hand fell on the door handle and twisted, “it’s too late now”

_______________________________________________________________________

Thank God for the Bakusquad. Mina took Kaida in and allowed her to stay at her modest 2 bedroom apartment until she figured out the next steps. A tearful Kai showing up on her front door at 5am with no plans and nowhere else to go.

It took the entire crew to go back to Kaida’s shared apartment and collect the rest of her things once she found a place. Hitoshi had been incessant in trying to ‘fix’ their relationship, and he was not something that Kai could face alone. Even a reluctant Bakugou came with them to collect her furniture and one of her cats (it only felt fair to each keep one since they were shared pets).

Thankfully due to her rising status as a hero, it wasn’t hard for Kai to move agencies to be further from Shinsou - ending up at Hawks Hero Agency as an underground hero working almost exclusively on covert missions.

After about a year away from Hitoshi and their failed relationship, Kai had settled herself into her new normal. A small one bedroom apartment overlooking the city, her cat Turtle and she even got a snake (because fuck Shinsou and his fear of snakes).

Kaida was strong. Her career was on the upswing, she loved her friends and honestly, she loved her life. Sure it took a while to get past the hurt of what had happened with Hitoshi, but now that she has, everything was great!

And she did not want a relationship. Relationships were for suckers. Been there fucking done that, and she would not be doing it again. But there’s only so much a vibrator can do.

As a hero the schedule Kai had to keep was hectic at best. Where does that leave any time for meeting people to hook up with? Plus, it seemed like anyone who showed any interest in her was only in it because they recognized her from the charts and wanted either the bragging rights of sleeping with a pro hero, or to try and snatch 5 minutes of fame by using her name. Neither was something that interested her in the slightest.

It didn’t take long for Kaida to bring up her “issue” at one of the squad nights. She was definitely not sober at the time.

_______________________________________________________________________

“Minaaaaaaaaaaaaaa” Kaida whined while throwing herself back into the booth with her friends, “Why does everyone suck so hard?”

“Who sucks?” Kirishima asked as he sipped his third beer of the night

“Yeah, want me to zap ‘em?” Denki chimed in, moving the umbrella from his drink aside so he could see Kai from across the table

Kaida giggled at his absolutely ridiculous drink and swayed into Bakugou who was next to her on the bench.

“Watch yourself ya fuckin’ idiot” Bakugou shoved back gently, while also making sure she didn’t fall off the seat and onto the floor.

“No zapping required Denks” Kai leaned her head on Bakugou’s shoulder much to his chagrin, “I just can’t deal with the suckfest of men” She moaned “Why is it so hard for an attractive able bodied woman to just find some casual sex!”

Bakugou choked on the drink he had been sipping, and Kirishima's eyes dart around the table refusing contact with anyone, his face reddening at the implication from his friend.

“Guys don’t be prudes” Mina pointed at the two men at the table being awkward

“Yeah guys, geez you’re acting like we aren’t all adults here” Denki added while turning his attention to Kaida, “Don’t worry baby, Daddy Denki is here now, I can help you out”

If looks could kill, the glare that Bakugou shot towards the electric blonde would have placed him in an early grave

“Shut it dunce face, like you could satisfy anyone” Bakugou snarled

Kai glanced between the two boys, too drunk to think clearly at this point in the evening, “You’re saying that like you can Bakubabe” she waggled her eyebrows up at him.

Bakugou glanced down towards her and smirked, “I’d fucking rock your world”

Mina looked between the two, recalling in the not so distant past that everyone was rooting for them to get together. Her smile widened, a mischievous look in her eye

“Why don’t we just hold a friendly little competition to see who’s better?” all eyes at the table turned to Mina as she spoke, “Kai, you kiss both Denki and Bakubro and tell us based on that kiss who would be a better lover”

Kaida’s eyebrows shot up as she looked from Mina to the two boys, neither one of them protesting

“Okay fine, c’mere sparky give me some sugar!” she motioned towards denki and puckered her lips

Bakugou’s eyes followed as the Blonde moved from his place at the table to come and stand in front of Kaida. Jealousy bloomed in his chest as he watched Kai’s arms wrap around Denki’s shoulders. He knew that his feelings from highschool hadn’t entirely receded, but until this moment he didn’t realize how strongly he still felt towards her. He watched as their lips pressed together, Denki’s tongue finding its way into Kaidas mouth.

A fairly quick and less than passionate kiss from Kai’s perspective seemed like an eternity to Bakugou. When they finally pulled away from each other Denki’s eyes were glazed over while Kai looked entirely unaffected.

“Alright Denks, that was cute” Kai gave his arm a gentle squeeze “but it was like kissing my brother which was fucking weird” she finished.

“Damn, don’t pull your punches or anything” Denki pouted at her as he made his way back to his seat and slouched down in it.

“Okay now time for you Bakubro, unless you’re afraid to lose?” Mina chided at the angry blonde, knowing he would never back down from a challenge

“Pft, yeah right, like I could lose to that glorified charging cable” Bakugou responded as he slid out of the booth to be face to face with Kaida.

He picked up his drink from the table and downed it in one shot, slamming the cup down and grabbing Kai by the back of the head and leaning in close

His voice dropping to a low baritone as he whispered against her lips, “I hope you’re ready sweet cheeks”

Kaida’s face bloomed with heat as she felt the warmth of his breath against her lips. She hadn’t really allowed herself to think of it much (since she was with Hitoshi for so long) but Bakugou was fucking hot. If he was attractive in high school, he would be like a Greek God now. He had grown several inches to make him about 6’3, and his broad shoulders were rippling with solid muscle. His face lost any of the childish wonder, and was now all sharp angles and harsh lines, only adding to the allure of him.

For the first time since high school, Kai was nervous about the prospect of kissing someone.

“Bring it on Boom boy” Kai whispered back, risking a glance up into his eyes only to find he was already staring down at her, an unreadable expression reflecting back at her.

He crashed his lips to hers and immediately fire engulfed her. The heat from the searing kiss only intensified as his tongue forced its way into her mouth. Kai’s hands grabbed the front of his shirt, pulling him impossibly closer while he snaked his arms around her waist. Their tongues battled for dominance, neither gaining the upper hand.

During the clearly passionate exchange, Mina ushered the rest of the group out of the table and towards the bar under the pretense of refills.

Bakugou cut off the heated kiss, allowing his lips to dance across her jaw. His hot breath against the shell of her ear caused shivers down Kai’s back as heat bloomed between her legs. A harsh bite against her neck caused an involuntary moan to escape Kaida’s throat. Her hands sliding up from his chest to snake into his hair. Bakugou's mouth continued to trail south, finding her chest as he sucked and licked, leaving marks on his way down. Kai tugged on the roots of his hair eliciting a deep moan from the blonde. Kai used his hair to pull him back as she looked into his eyes, half lidded with lust.

Kaida’s pushed her lips against his again, a moan from Bakugou's throat was swallowed by her greedy mouth

“Lets leave” she whispered against his lips, trailing her hands down from his head and across his chest, leaving a scorching trail of heat.

She turned on her heel and walked towards the exit, Bakugou following behind her in anticipation.

_______________________________________________________________________

That was just over a year ago, and ever since the two of you have had this undefined relationship. You had sex whenever you could, and still hung out with the Bakusquad like normal. Everyone hounded the two of you in the beginning, trying to force Bakugou to define your situation, but Kaida made it very clear she was NOT interested in dating anyone. Bakugou mimicked that sentiment, once again stating that if he was going to be in the running for number 1 he wouldn't have time for a shitty girlfriend, but that certainly didn’t mean he didnt have time for sex.

It was a stress reliever for both of you, and honestly a great set up. Kai knew he was only sleeping with her, and vice versa. No one had to worry about catching something nasty, or trying to find someone to have casual sex with. It was perfect. No feelings, just sex.

And thank God he wasn’t some vanilla bitch in the bedroom. After years with Hitoshi who always wanted to ‘make love’ Kai was happy to be sleeping with someone who embodied the word ‘Fuck’. The sex was hard and passionate, and Bakugou was not against trying out new things and bringing toys into the mix.

Which is exactly why at the moment, Kai was in her apartment digging through her box of sex toys to find the perfect thing for tonight. It wasn’t often that Bakugou let her top, so she was going to make the most of it.

Pulling out her phone and snapping a picture of the strap she smiled and quickly sent it off as she walked out the front door of her apartment a convenient 5 minutes away from his.

[4:28am] Idiot (Sexy): Attached 1 image

[4:28am] Idiot (Sexy): You better be ready baby, I’m coming for you.

#bakugou x oc #katsuki bakugou #bakugou fanfiction #bakugou x reader #bnha bakugo katsuki #bakugo katuski #shouta aizawa x reader #shouta aizawa #bnha aizawa #shouta aizawa x oc #aizawa x you #katsuki smut #bnha smut #bhna fanfiction #hitoshi shinso x y/n #shinsou smut #shinsou hitoshi x oc

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junghelioseok · 4 years ago

Text

clandestine. | 03

↳ forbidden fruit tastes the sweetest.

◇ jungkook x reader ◇ smut | fluff | brother’s best friend!au ◇ 9.2k [3/6]

notes: this will likely be my last update of this fic until the new year, because i have two (2!!!) other fics that i’m planning to post in december, including another jungoo one, so! please look forward to those, and enjoy this chapter in the meantime!

warnings: jk’s massive noona kink: a recurring yet warranted warning, me absolutely fucking up everything about korea’s geography probably, semi-public? fingering???, jungkook....... shall we say, rocks the boat, there is one (1) dick pic but no one’s complaining

⇢ 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06

Monday - 11:27am

Kim Taehyung added you to the group: the great escape!!!!!! 🏝🚗💨

[11:27am] Taehyung: let’s gooooooooooo!!

[11:27am] Jisoo: ???

[11:28am] Lisa: go where?

[11:28am] Taehyung: parks lake house this weekend! we’re going on vacation!

[11:28am] You: hold up tae, we haven’t even asked our parents if we can have the house yet

[11:29am] Chimchim: oh yeah lmao

[11:29am] Chimchim: u wanna go ask noona??

[11:29am] You: nope

[11:30am] Chimchim: ugh, fine

[11:30am] Chimchim: u big baby

[11: 31am] You: 🙄

[11: 37am] Chimchim: they said yes!

[11:38am] Taehyung: LET’S GOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

[11:38am] Minho: sweet 👍

[11:38am] Taemin: tight

[11:39am] Jungkook: dope

[11:40AM] Jisoo: you’re all idiots 🙄

Tuesday - 2:34pm

[2:34pm] Chimchim: i’ve secured the van

[2:34pm] Chimchim: for the trip i mean

[2:35pm] Taehyung: noice

[2:35pm] You: 10 people aren’t gonna fit in mom’s van, chim

[2:37pm] Jungkook: i can drive too

[2:37pm] Chimchim: 👍👍

[2:37pm] Chimchim: see? nothing to worry about

[2:38pm] Jungkook: yeah noona, nothing to worry about. nothing at all.

Wednesday - 9:49pm

[9:49pm] Taehyung: oh my god we need FOOD

[9:49pm] Lisa: you’re just realizing that now?

[9:50pm] Taehyung: shut up

[9:50pm] Taehyung: i have a cooler

[9:51pm] Lisa: and ice?

[9:51pm] Taehyung: ………… i will buy some ice

[9:52pm] You: there’s a grocery store on the way up that we always used to go to, we can stock up there

[9:52pm] Taehyung: 👍

[9:54pm] You: you also better remember to bring your own towels. and more than one change of clothing

[9:54pm] Taehyung: 👍👍

[9:55pm] Chimchim: yes, mom

///

The day of the trip finds you standing in the foyer, rifling through your purse to make sure you have all the essentials. Off in the distance, you can hear Jimin sprinting around frantically, catching the briefest glimpse of his ruffled blond hair before he disappears again into the depths of the house.

“Chim, I swear to god. Why didn’t you pack earlier?”

“I did!” your brother whines, poking his head out from the living room where his suitcase is lying wide open, belongings scattered in every direction. “It’s just that—oh, fuck. Do you have my toothbrush?”

“Why would I have your toothbrush?” you deadpan.

He ignores you, and not two seconds later, he lets out an excited shout. “Never mind! I found it!”

You sigh and rub your temples. The trip hasn’t even begun, yet you’re already feeling the beginnings of a headache coming on. “I’m going outside,” you call to your brother, who grunts in acknowledgement. Opening up the front door, you drag your suitcase out onto the sun-drenched porch, relishing the welcome breeze that caresses your cheeks and whispers through your hair.

The rare moment of peace is broken almost immediately by the rumble of a starting engine—the sound shuddery and wavering before it finally evens out into a steady, mechanical purr. It’s coming from nearby, and your gaze immediately travels to the neighboring driveway where a beat-up sedan sits, torn between exasperation and amusement when you see Jungkook waving at you from the driver’s seat.

“I’m coming to pick you up!” he calls through the open window, and you hold back your laughter as he reverses out of his driveway, rolls ten feet down the street, and pulls into yours.

“Was that really necessary?” you ask once he’s parked.

“Of course it was,” he replies, hopping out to grab your suitcase. You watch as he pops the trunk and loads it inside, and blanch when you realize what that means.

“Wait a second. Am I riding with you?”

Some emotion flashes across his face, but he wipes it away before you can identify it. “Would that be so terrible?”

It’s been one week since Taehyung’s party, and Jisoo’s warning still rings loud and clear in your brain. Still, you feign nonchalance and tamp down the uptick in your heart rate, offering him a shrug. “Just wasn’t expecting it, that’s all.”

He grunts. An awkward silence settles over you as he adjusts your suitcase in the trunk beside his, and you distract yourself by fiddling with your purse strap until he slams the lid closed.

“So…” you start after a few seconds. “Are we picking anyone else up?”

“Yugyeom,” Jungkook replies, opening up the driver’s side door and climbing in. Hesitantly, you make your way over to the other side of the car, wondering if there’s any way you can avoid sitting in the passenger seat without looking like a total weirdo.

“Oh! Jungkook’s here already?” Jimin exits the house at last, lugging his suitcase and a smaller backpack. He shoves both into the backseat of your mother’s van before coming over, frowning when he sees you hovering near the trunk. “Why are you just standing there?”

You make a face at him. “We’re waiting for you, dumbass. Who’s riding with you?”

“Tae, Minho, and Taemin,” your brother replies. “Didn’t you see the group chat this morning?”

“I muted it days ago,” you admit. “You guys were annoying as hell.” Then another thought strikes you, your brain belatedly registering the names Jimin listed. “Wait, what about the girls? Aren’t they coming?”

Your brother rolls his eyes. “Jisoo’s working as a camp counselor this summer, and Lisa has other vacation plans. Maybe if you hadn’t muted the chat, you’d have known that.”

He has a point, though you aren’t about to admit that. You’re also wise enough not to inquire about the third member of the trio, remembering Jisoo’s revelation at the party. It’s no surprise that Chaeyoung isn’t joining you for the weekend—you’d want to avoid extended periods of time with your ex-boyfriend too. At the thought, your gaze reluctantly flits back over to the ex in question, who raises an expectant brow when he catches your eye.

“Ready?” he calls out the open window.

No, you want to say. But Jimin has already clambered into the van and slammed the door shut, and Jungkook’s car is blocking the van in the driveway so you suck in a deep breath and slide into the passenger seat beside your dark-haired neighbor.

“Yeah. Let’s go.”

Jungkook nods and throws the car into reverse. One hand splays across the wheel while the other comes up to rest on the back of your seat, and your breath hitches when he cranes around to check his blind spots, his face suddenly too close for comfort.

He’s playing with you, you tell yourself firmly, leaning back until your back’s pressed against the door and you can safely breathe again. Chaeyoung. Think about what he did to Chaeyoung.

“Hey, I made a roadtrip mix,” Jungkook pipes up all of a sudden. He grabs his phone from where it’s resting on the dashboard, tapping at the screen until the first strains of a melody filter through the car speakers. “It should last us the whole way.”

You perk up when you recognize the tune. “Oh! I love this song.”

Jungkook watches out of the corner of his eye as you bob your head to the beat, before smiling down at his lap. “Yeah. I know.”

///

Yugyeom lives on the other side of town, in a sprawling, winding neighborhood that sends your brain—and your phone’s GPS—into a complete and total tailspin. “Wait, wait—hang on. I think you missed a turn. You must have.”

Jungkook’s face crumples in confusion as he slows the car to a crawl, drawing a few irritated honks from the cars behind you. “There weren’t any streets back there, though.”

“Are you sure?” you ask, twisting in your seat to get a better look. “The directions said to take a right in… oh, fuck, hang on. We’re not even on a digitized road anymore, apparently.”

Jungkook heaves a sigh, but when you glance up at him, he’s wearing a grin. “Come on, Noona. You’re supposed to be my navigator. I’m depending on you.”

“I only know how to get us to the lake house, not Yugyeom’s,” you sniff defensively. “This is way beyond my pay grade.”

Jungkook chortles and reaches out, extending an open palm. “Can I see your phone for a sec?” You nod, handing it over, and he clicks his tongue as he turns it upside-down—rotating it a full three hundred and sixty degrees before returning it. “We might be lost,” he declares.

“Gee, you don’t say.”

He chuckles again. Picking up his own phone, he swipes a thumb across the screen before handing the unlocked device over. “Here, call Yugyeom. Put him on speaker, yeah?”

You hum in acknowledgement and scroll down in his contacts until you find the other boy’s name, clicking it open. A photo fills the screen as it rings—clearly a group photo from the way it’s cropped, zoomed in on Yugyeom and the ridiculous face he’s making.

“Is this from graduation?” you ask curiously.

Jungkook blinks and tears his gaze away from the windshield. “Huh?”

“Yugyeom’s contact photo,” you clarify, tilting the phone screen so he can see. “He’s got robes on.”

“Oh.” He looks away again, cheeks flushing. “Yeah. It’s lame, I know.”

You shake your head. “Don’t say that. I think it’s nice.”

Jungkook doesn’t get a chance to respond, but it’s impossible to miss the grin that crinkles his face and settles there. There’s a staticky hum as the line connects, and then Yugyeom’s voice is filling the vehicle, sounding as if he’s just rolled out of bed.

“Whaddaya want?”

“We can’t find your fucking house, man,” Jungkook says bluntly, turning onto a street that you’ve driven down at least three times by this point. “Where do you live?”

On the other end of the line, Yugyeom sighs. “Okay, okay. What street are you guys on?”

That gives Jungkook pause. “Uhh, Cedar Street? Oak Avenue? It has a tree name.”

“Neither of those streets exist, dude.”

“Birch Boulevard!” you exclaim. “We’re on Birch Boulevard. I saw the sign a while back.”

“Ah, okay. You’re close, then. Do you see a sign for Linden Lane?”

You glance around until you alight on a signpost. “Yeah.”

“Turn right onto it. Then take the first left, go past the cul-de-sac, and another left. Do not pass Go, and do not collect two-hundred dollars. I’m the fifth house on the right.”

He ends the call before you can ask him to repeat the directions, and you send Jungkook a helpless look. “Did you get all of that?”

“Besides the overused Monopoly joke?” Jungkook asks.. “Yeah, I got it. Right, left, left. Fifth house. Shouldn’t take more than a few minutes to get there.”

And true to his word, you arrive at the house three minutes later. Yugyeom is standing on the front step with rumpled hair and a duffel bag at his feet, and you snort when he throws open the car door and flops across the entirety of the backseat.

“Rough morning?”

“Stayed up late packing,” he says by way of explanation, his eyes already beginning to drift shut. Jungkook immediately turns the music up, and you giggle when Yugyeom shoots upright at the bassline that’s now shaking the entire vehicle. “I’m up, I’m up! Jeez, man.”

Jungkook just sends him an innocent grin in the rearview mirror. You turn the volume back down to a reasonable level as Yugyeom directs Jungkook onto the best route to take out of the neighborhood, and it isn’t long before you’re merging onto the highway that leads toward the coast.

You’re just beginning to get comfortable, staring out the window at the passing cityscape, when your leg vibrates with an incoming text notification. Glancing down, you see that Jungkook’s phone has slipped between your thigh and the seat, the screen lit with a new message.

[10:21am] Minho: gonna be at the store in 10

“Minho says they’ll be at the grocery store in ten minutes,” you relay to your companions. “We have a little longer to go. Probably another half hour or so.”

“We wouldn’t be so far behind if Yugyeom didn’t live in a fucking labyrinth,” Jungkook remarks, but a glance at the young man in the backseat reveals that he’s drifted off despite your earlier stunt. Rolling his eyes, he turns to you. “Can you text him back, Noona?”

You nod and hold out his phone so he can unlock it with his thumb. “Hey,” you say once you’ve hit send on the message. “Do you have a contact photo for me?”

Jungkook stiffens slightly, his gaze skittering between you and the road. “Oh. Uh, yeah, I guess I do. But it’s nothing, really. It’s kinda lame. But you… you can look at it if you want.”

Curiosity piqued, you scroll down until you find your name, tapping on the image beside it. The photo is from several years ago, during a family trip to the lake house with the Jeons. You are no older than fifteen, your arm slung around a fourteen-year-old Jungkook as the two of you stand knee-deep in the lake, wearing swimsuits and bright smiles. In the background, you can just barely make out a blurry Jimin mid-splash.

“I remember this,” you murmur, zooming in on your smiling faces. “That was a fun summer.”

“Junghyun was grumpy the whole time,” Jungkook recalls with a laugh. “But we had a good time, didn’t we? We practically lived in the lake that entire week.”

“Or that old canoe.” You grin, taking one last look at the photo before locking his phone and handing it back to him. “Remember? We’d always row out too far, and our parents would scream for us to come back before we fell in and drowned.”

Jungkook snickers. “As if I’d ever let you drown. I’m a great swimmer.”

“Are you saying I’m not?”

He backpedals immediately, realizing his mistake. “Hey, don’t twist my words. I said nothing of the sort.”

“That’s what I thought.” Giggling, you turn to look out the window, propping your chin in your palm as you watch the scenery flash past. “And I want that photo, by the way. Send it to me?”

“As soon as we get to the store,” Jungkook promises. “Speaking of which, we’re getting close. Keep an eye out for the exit for me?”

“Deal.”

///

Jimin and the others are waiting in the parking lot when you arrive, perched on and around the van as they watch Jungkook expertly maneuver the car into a neighboring parking space. “Took you long enough,” your brother says once the engine is cut, hopping off the hood and landing lightly on both feet.

“We’re here now, aren’t we?” you snark as you join the others hovering near the grocery store entrance. Jimin makes a face at you, and you stick your tongue out in response. After a quick huddle—wherein you form a very haphazard game plan—everyone disperses. Jimin grabs a shopping cart and heads inside with Taehyung and Minho, the latter of whom is trying to clamber his way into the cart to hitch a ride.

Sighing, you grab a shopping cart of your own and scan the interior of the store for the produce section. They’ve rearranged the aisles since you were last here, but you quickly find what you’re looking for and begin picking your way over when Jungkook materializes at your side.

“So, what are you thinking for food?” he asks, nudging you away so he can push the cart in your stead.

You allow him to take over, gesturing toward your destination. “I know my brother,” you tell him dryly. “He’s going to buy meat and completely forget about everything else. And I don’t trust any of you to buy a single fruit or vegetable.”

“I like fruit and vegetables,” Jungkook defends.

“You like everything,” you correct, flashing him a teasing grin before leading him into the produce section.

Grocery shopping with Jungkook turns out to be surprisingly pleasant—comfortable, even. He proves adept at finding the ripest fruits and greenest vegetables, and when you ask him to find some apples, he trots off immediately and returns with a handful of sweet potatoes in addition to your requested fruit.

You raise an eyebrow. “What are you planning to do with those?”

Jungkook feigns offense, slapping a hand to his heart. “That’s cold, Noona. Don’t you think I can cook?”

“I’ve never seen you cook in my life,” you respond. “How am I supposed to know if you can or not?”

“I can,” he promises. “And I’ll prove it too, if you let me.”

You get the feeling he’s not just talking about cooking anymore, but he doesn’t give you a chance to answer. Dropping the apples and potatoes into the cart, he flashes you a crooked little smile before turning toward a display of cabbages, leaving you to wonder at what exactly is going through his head.

///

It’s nearly one in the afternoon when you arrive at your family’s lake house. The last stretch of the drive takes you through the forest along a winding, narrow road, but Jungkook is a capable driver and you know the way well enough to warn him about any upcoming hairpin turns. Piling out of the car, the three of you make quick work of putting the food safely into the refrigerator. By the time you’re finished, Jimin and the others have arrived as well, lugging their belongings inside and setting them inside the entryway.

“So who’s sleeping where?” Taehyung asks, glancing around the house. It’s modestly sized, with a living area on one side and a combined dining room and kitchen on the other. Three bedrooms and a bathroom branch off of the hallway between them, ending in a back door that leads out to the lake. Through the window, you can see the water glimmering in the sunlight, hazy and golden.

“We’ll have to share,” Jimin says. “ If Noona takes one room, that leaves two bedrooms and the pullout couch for the rest of us.”

Jungkook tilts his head. “Rock, paper, scissors?” he suggests, drawing a chorus of groans.

“I always lose!” Jimin complains. “And Taemin cheats!”

“Do not!”

Laughing at the indignant expression on your brother’s face, you decide to leave them to it and head to your bedroom with your luggage in tow. The room is just as you remember it, with a bed tucked against one wall and a dresser on the opposite. There are three doors in total—one that you just entered through, and another that opens into a small closet. The third leads to a bathroom—shared with the bedroom on the other side of the wall that usually belongs to Jimin. Vaguely, you wonder who will be sleeping there tonight, before setting your suitcase on the bed and unzipping it.

“Fuck!”

You jump at the sudden shout, poking your head out into the hallway to see what’s causing all the commotion. Yugyeom is kneeling on the floor with his head down, a crestfallen Taemin standing beside him. Meanwhile, Taehyung and Minho look supremely pleased with themselves, and you see why when they grab their bags and practically skip to the master bedroom across the hall, collapsing onto the king-sized bed.

“Have fun on the couch, losers!” Jimin singsongs, grabbing Jungkook by the wrist and dragging him into their newly won bedroom on your side of the hallway. “Lake in fifteen minutes, so get changed! Last one there’s in charge of dinner!”

The door slams shut behind him, and you roll your eyes before turning back to your opened suitcase and pulling out a book. There’s a perfectly shaded spot beneath one of the trees along the water, and you fully intend to capitalize on the last few hours of daylight before the sun begins to set.

Minho is the only one outside when you exit the house, standing on the dock in a pair of green swim trunks. He waves at you cheerily before cannonballing into the lake, and you squeak as the resulting splash sends water splattering across the front of your shirt.

“Sorry!” he calls when he resurfaces, shaking his hair out like a wet dog.

You wave off his apology with a laugh, settling down onto the soft grass at the base of your chosen tree and opening up your book. The other boys trickle out of the house one by one, but you barely notice. It isn’t until a triumphant shout pierces the air that you finally glance up to see what’s causing all the commotion, your gaze immediately landing on Taehyung standing on the back steps of the house.

“Trust me,” he says, unbothered by his apparent tardiness. “You don’t want me to make dinner.”

Minho pulls a face and straightens up from where he’d been floating on his back. “You know, he kinda has a point there.”

Murmurs of agreement all around. Taehyung gives Jimin a smug smile, who scowls from where he’s sitting at the end of the dock, his bare feet dangling over the edge. “So what now? Do we have to play rock, paper, scissors again?”

“Nah, I’ll do it.”

Every head whips around to face Jungkook, yours included. He’s standing a short ways from where you’re sitting—his approach so quiet that you hadn’t even heard him arrive. The last time you checked, he’d been diving off the dock with Minho and Yugyeom, water pooling in his collarbones and dripping down the ridges of his taut abdomen each time he resurfaced.

Not that you’d been looking, of course.

“Really?” Jimin looks aghast at his best friend’s declaration. “You can cook?”

Jungkook scoffs in disbelief and plops down beside you, leaning back against the tree trunk. “Why does everyone in your family seem surprised by that?” he asks, his lip jutting out in a petulant frown. “Do I seem like someone who can’t cook?”

“Yes,” you tell him honestly, marking your page and letting the book fall shut. “Don’t take it personally, though. Men only learn how to cook in college when they have to start fending for themselves. And sometimes, not even then.”

The noise that leaves Jungkook’s mouth can best be described as disgruntled, but he doesn’t press any further. Instead, he peers over your shoulder to get a look at the cover of your book, mouthing the title to himself before glancing at you. “Haven’t I seen you reading this before?”

“Probably,” you admit. “It’s an old favorite.”

He hums, slouching back against the tree again, and when you look over, you see that both his eyes have fallen shut. With his mouth parted and his dark lashes resting on his cheeks, he looks years younger than he is—and so much more like the Jungkook you used to know.

“Tired?” you whisper.

“Long drive,” Jungkook whispers back, his head already beginning to loll. “Lemme sleep, Noona.”

Smiling to yourself, you return to your book and leave him to rest.

///

“So, what are you even planning to make?” Jimin asks, swinging his legs. He’s seated atop the kitchen counter, taking up the majority of what precious little space there is to begin with, and Jungkook sighs deeply as he’s forced to dodge around him yet again to peer into the refrigerator.

“You’ll see.”

“I don’t think you even know yet,” Taemin pipes up from the doorway. The other boys are in the living room playing Mario Kart, but Taemin and Jimin have selflessly pulled themselves away from the game to help their friend in the kitchen—or so they say. As far as you’re concerned, they’ve been nothing but a nuisance thus far, but you don’t voice that particular thought aloud.

“Ramen doesn’t count as making dinner,” Jimin points out snidely when Jungkook pauses too long next to the box of ramen packs. “Anyone can boil water. And you don’t get to add an egg and call it fancy, like you usually do.”

“My ramen is delicious, excuse you,” Jungkook retorts, pointing a spatula at him. “And that’s not even what I’m making, so fuck off.”

Jimin shrugs, but shuts his mouth nonetheless. You take the opportunity to throw some pork belly at him, the meat wrapped neatly in paper and tied off with twine. “Here,” you tell him. “You could at least make yourself useful and start grilling the meat.”

“Okay, mom,” your brother grumbles under his breath, hopping off the counter. He and Taemin head out to the back porch where the grill sits, and you join Jungkook at the stove where he’s staring thoughtfully at an empty pan.

“Try twisting the dial. I’ve heard that helps.”

Jungkook snaps out of his daze and turns to you. “Huh?”

“The stove. It won’t light itself, you know.”

Chuckling, Jungkook twists the dial as instructed, adding a drizzle of oil to the pan. As it heats up, he turns and selects a knife from the cutlery drawer. The sweet potatoes he’d insisted on purchasing are already washed and peeled, and you watch as he begins to slice them, your gaze automatically flitting down to his exposed forearms, his muscles flexing with every movement.

“Hey, Noona? Can you do me a favor?”

You blink, tearing your gaze from the branching veins lining his arms. “What?”

Jungkook, thankfully, doesn’t seem to notice your distracted state. “Can you put the rice in the microwave?” he asks, and you can’t help but giggle.

“Why?” you tease. “Are you still scared?”

“Of course not,” he retorts, but you don’t miss the wary look that flashes across his face when you plop the rice inside and go to punch in the cook time.

The remainder of the cooking goes smoothly. Jimin and Taemin return with the grilled meat, and Jungkook rebuffs your offer to set the table, leaving his position at the stove to lay plates and utensils down on the table himself. “I’m just about done, anyway,” he tells you, gesturing at the plate of glazed sweet potatoes on the counter. “Sit down and relax, Noona.”

“Fine,” you relent, taking a seat. Jimin takes the chair beside you, and Taemin plops down on his other side. Jungkook sits down just to your left once he’s finished laying out the food, and for a brief, insane moment, you almost think that he’s going to repeat what he’d done at his graduation dinner. But the dark-haired young man remains on his best behavior, keeping his hands to himself under the table, and you aren’t sure whether you’re grateful or disappointed.

The meal flies by in a flurry of laughter and conversation. Jungkook discovers that his glazed sweet potatoes have adhered to the plate, and sends everyone into hysterics when he promptly starts spinning it around like a steering wheel.

It’s a good night. And at the end of it, you go to bed warm and content, with a belly full of food and a smile on your face.

///

You awaken to the sound of chirping songbirds and gentle waves lapping at the shore the next morning, thoroughly rejuvenated after an undisturbed night’s sleep. Stretching your arms overhead, you yawn and bask in the comfort of your bed for a few more moments before getting up and heading to the bathroom, thankful that you don’t have to fight anyone for sink occupancy. The toilet seat is even down, which comes as a welcome surprise, all things considered.

Before long, you are back in your bedroom, rifling through the contents of your suitcase. Belatedly, you realize that you’ve packed only one swimsuit—and a bikini, at that. Cheeks warming, you pull the two pieces out, holding them up against your body. Has it always been this small? You don’t remember. All you know is that Jungkook has two fully functional eyes, and there’s no way that he won’t be looking at every inch of skin you choose to expose.

In the end, you settle on wearing the bikini beneath a flowy, floral kimono-style robe, tied at the waist to form a makeshift dress. The ensemble reaches just past your knees and is sheer enough to still show skin, but you no longer feel as self-conscious going out into the view of your companions and that’s a victory as far as you’re concerned. Checking your reflection one last time, you adjust your sash before opening the bedroom door and heading down the hall for some breakfast.

Unsurprisingly, the kitchen is empty when you walk in, tiptoeing past a still slumbering Taemin and Yugyeom on the pullout couch. You savor the quiet as you start up the old coffeemaker, pulling a mug from the cabinet and rinsing it out to get rid of any lingering dust. The weather app on your phone promises that it’ll be a clear, cloudless day, and a glance out the window confirms it. Silently, you debate whether or not to crack a window.

Your musings are interrupted by the arrival of Taehyung, his brown hair sticking up at all angles. Blearily, he trundles to the fridge and grabs the orange juice, seemingly two seconds away from chugging it straight from the carton before you clear your throat and push a clean glass toward him. You think you hear him mumble a thank you.

As the morning wears on, the others slowly begin to trickle in. Breakfast is a disorganized affair that leaves bread crumbs all over the counter, and nearly causes a fight when everyone seems to want their eggs cooked a different way.

“Look, if you wanted your egg soft-boiled, you should’ve made it yourself!” Jimin grouches to Taehyung, the t-shirt over his head muffling his words. Everyone else is already in the water, splashing about, but you’re seated on the end of the dock with your brother and Taehyung, who looks thoroughly unfazed behind his tinted sunglasses.

“Maybe if I knew how to soft boil an egg, I would have.”

“Google exists,” Jimin says, finally freeing himself from the shirt and tossing it aside.

Taehyung nods sagely. “Exactly. So why didn’t you use it?”

Jimin is beginning to look positively murderous, so when Minho swims over and taps your submerged ankle, you are beyond grateful for the distraction. “Hey. What’s up?”

“Are you gonna swim, or are you gonna sit onshore the whole time?” Minho asks, raking his wet bangs out of his eyes. “The water’s not even cold, so get in here.”

Pointedly, you wiggle your toes. “Feels pretty cold to me.”

“Okay, fine. It’s cold.” Minho grins. “But you get used to it.”

You sigh at his easy admission. “All men do is lie. How am I supposed to believe you?”

He raises a brow. “Do I need to pull you in and dunk you under?”

“I will kick you if you even try,” you tell him, standing up and shrugging off your robe. An audible hush falls as the gauzy material pools around your ankles—Jungkook stops wrestling with Yugyeom and trying to dunk him underwater, and Taemin pauses mid-splash, his hair drenched and dripping.

It’s Minho who breaks the silence first, letting loose a low whistle of appreciation. “Damn, {Name}.”

Jimin grabs a shoe from the pile on the dock and chucks it at him, hard. “Dude, that’s my fucking sister!”

“Ow! What the fuck, man, that’s my shoe!”

“Quit ogling my sister!”

“I’m not!” Minho yells, just as Jimin chucks the other shoe and hits him square in the mouth. “Okay, I’m not anymore. Sorry, okay?”

Once he’s sufficiently sure that Jimin is done attacking him, Minho turns to you. “I’m sorry,” he says sincerely. “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable or anything. You know that, right?”

“I know,” you reassure him. “Honestly, it was kinda good for my self-esteem. And I don’t need you defending my honor, or whatever it is you think you’re doing,” you add, glancing over at your disgruntled brother.

“Men are pigs,” Jimin sniffs. “I won’t apologize.”

You ruffle his hair good-naturedly. “I know, Chim. You’re right.” Then your smile turns mischievous. “I won’t apologize for what I’m about to do, either.”

And then you grab him by the arm and drag him into the lake, the cold water submerging you in an instant and stealing the breath out of your lungs. You’re both gasping by the time you resurface, blinking water out of your eyes, and you squeal when Jimin takes the opportunity to splash you again.

Hours pass—the sun rising higher overhead. Around noon, Taehyung disappears inside the house and returns with an assortment of snacks and sandwich fixings, ushering everyone over for an impromptu lunch on the dock. You dip your feet into the water as you munch on a bag of chips, and Jungkook plops down beside you with a juice box in one hand and a ham sandwich in the other.

“Wanna go for a ride in the canoe after lunch?” he asks, jabbing a thumb back in the direction of the house. “I found it in the garage.”

You laugh. “Really? I thought for sure we got rid of that thing. Are you sure it hasn’t sprung a leak?”

Jungkook’s face crinkles into a grin. “Guess we’ll have to wait and see, huh?”

You grin back and raise your cup, the lemonade inside swishing around. “I’ll hang on to this, just in case I need to start bailing water out.”

Lunchtime winds down gradually. Jungkook polishes off his sandwich and trots off to fetch the canoe, waving off your offers to help before disappearing around the corner of the house. You watch him return a few minutes later from your seat on the end of the dock, resting your weight back on your hands and swirling your pruney toes in the water. He’s stripped off the loose white tee he’d donned during lunch, his golden skin cast in shadow by the canoe perched across his bare shoulders, and your gaze trails from his bulging biceps down to the ridges of his abdomen. The muscles flex with every step he takes, and you hastily take another sip of lemonade in an effort to combat the sudden dryness in your throat.

With a grunt, Jungkook comes to a stop at your elbow, heaving the boat into the water. The impact sends ripples across the lake and the butterflies in your belly into a frenzy, and you nearly fall off the dock when Jungkook touches your shoulder gently.

“Ready to go, Noona?”

You nod, not quite trusting yourself to speak. Jungkook holds the boat steady with one hand while offering you the other, and you gratefully grasp it as you step off the dock. The canoe rocks dangerously when Jungkook clambers in after you, but quickly steadies when he picks up an oar and jabs at the dock to push off into the lake. The glimmering expanse of blue water stretches before you, and you relax as you let your fingers dangle off the side of the boat, watching ripples form beneath your fingertips.

“I can help row,” you say after a few moments, casting a glance over at Jungkook. He’s settled into a rhythm now, the veins and tendons in his arm flexing with each movement, and you’re suddenly very aware of how close he’s sitting.

“You—” Jungkook says, fixing you with a playful stare, “—just enjoy the ride, yeah?”

Shaking your head, you smile and turn back around to admire the view. Sunlight reflects off the rippling water, lending a golden iridescence to the glittering blue depths. In the distance, the opposite shoreline rises up, crowned with rocky outcrops and majestic dark green pines.

With a start, you realize how far away you’ve gotten from the other boys. The shouts and laughter from the house are quickly fading into the background, and you nervously turn to look at Jungkook as he rows you even further.

“God, my dad would freak if he saw us right now,” you remark, trying to diffuse the sudden tension that’s settled. “I mean, we don’t even have life jackets. He’d lose his mind.”

Jungkook hums. He stops rowing, his hands stilling on the oars, and you’re just about to ask him what’s wrong when a warm hand glides up your thigh.

“You think you could maybe stop talking about your dad, princess?” Then he smirks. “Unless you’re into the whole daddy kink thing, because I’d be down to explore that at some point if you want—“

“Jungkook!” you hiss, scandalized.

“Yes?” the young man in question hums, his face the picture of innocence. It’s hard to muster up your vocabulary when he’s looking up at you with those wide doe eyes, but you somehow manage to prevail over your malfunctioning brain.

“We’re in public!” you whisper, glancing back at the shore where your brother and his friends have started an impromptu game of water polo.

Jungkook smirks crookedly at you. “Guess you better not scream too loud, then.”

And then, before you can open your mouth to protest—before you can even try to call his bluff—he’s slipped his hand into your bikini bottoms and found his way to your clit. Your entire body spasms when he presses into it experimentally, and the resulting snicker that escapes him is nothing short of infuriating.

“Careful,” he coos, laying his free hand on your thigh, his thumb rubbing nonsensical circles into the soft skin. “Don’t wanna rock the boat, now.”

Then he returns his attention to your clit, pinching the nub just to watch you jolt in his grasp and soothing you with a gentle kiss to the knee afterward. Your skin warms beneath the plush of his lips, and the pleased smile that curves them is all the warning you get before he sheathes a single finger in your clenching core. “Jungkook—” you gasp, shoving uselessly at his bare shoulders, but you can’t keep the edge of desire out of your voice. You can’t hide the growing wetness between your legs either—wetness that he most certainly feels as he slips another finger inside, pumping into you with ease.

“God, look at you,” he murmurs, his eyes trained on the way you clench around him. “So pretty like this. So pretty, getting fucked by my fingers. I could do this all day.”

“We—we don’t have all day,” you whisper. The last syllable dissolves into a moan as Jungkook eases a third finger into your cunt, and you scrabble to ground yourself when he picks up his leisurely pace. One hand settles on the edge of the boat, your fingernails digging into the wood, while the other finds Jungkook’s bicep. His arm flexes beneath your grip with each snap of his wrist, and you keen when he crooks his fingers just right and sends stars skittering across your vision.

He knows that you’re getting close. You can tell from the growing furrow between his brows and the hard set of his jaw, and you can tell that he won’t stop until he gets you off. Concentration etches across his face, and you gasp when his thumb finds your clit again.

“Oh, fuck, Jungkook—”

“That’s it,” he rasps, digging deeper and thumbing roughly across your bundle of nerves. “Cum for me.”

And you do. With one final flick of his wrist, Jungkook sends you hurtling over the edge that he’s so effortlessly built, a cresting wave of pleasure overtaking your body and spreading through your veins. Your leg kicks out instinctively, rocking the canoe dangerously in the water, but Jungkook catches you by the ankle with his free hand and presses a kiss to the inside of your thigh. He shifts his weight until you’re steadied once more, and only then does he ease his fingers out of you, raising them to his mouth to lick them clean.

“Think we can sneak away so I can fuck you properly?” he asks.

Your cheeks heat up at the lewd display, warming even more when his words register in your muddled brain. “Oh my god, Jungkook.”

“That’s exactly what you’ll be saying when I really get my hands on you,” Jungkook agrees. Flashing you a mischievous grin, he drops his hand over the edge of the boat, letting the turquoise water wash away any lingering fluids. “What do you think? The backseat of my car isn’t half bad…”

“I will literally push you into this lake,” you tell him, trying and failing to hide a disbelieving laugh. “Why are you such a perv?”

“You like it,” Jungkook defends immediately. “‘Sides,” he adds, casting a wary glance at the shore where Jimin and the others are still fully engrossed in their game, “I wanna kiss you while I fuck you. It’s not as good like this.”

At that, something dangerously close to affection blooms in your belly, winding its curious tendrils around your heart. Swallowing the feeling down, you pick up one of the oars instead, handing it over to him before hefting the other. “Come on,” you murmur. “They’re gonna get suspicious if we’re gone too long.”

Jungkook hums. “Yeah. Probably.”

And then he raises the oar you just handed him, lifting it until the paddle covers both of your faces, and boldly plants a firm kiss on your mouth.

“I’ll row us back,” he declares casually when he pulls away, as if he hasn’t just stolen all the oxygen from your lungs. As if your lips aren’t burning where he’s kissed you, your cheeks hot beneath his gentle exhalations. As if you aren’t positively thrumming with the desire to pull him back in, and maybe take him up on his offer to fuck you in the backseat of his beat-up sedan.

“Yeah,” you say instead, your voice hoarse. “Let’s go.”

///

What few remaining hours of daylight you have, you decide to spend inside. Jungkook gets roped into the water polo match as soon as the two of you return to shore, and you take the opportunity to slip into the house and clean yourself up. Safely locked away in the bathroom, you strip off your damp bikini bottoms and toss them in the sink. The top follows, and you give both a quick wash, doing your best to ignore the remaining slick from your orgasm that stubbornly coats the material.

Once everything is washed and hanging up to dry, you step into the shower. Warm water soaks your hair and slides down your back, and you tilt your head back to let the spray wash your worries away, relishing in the rare moment of peace and quiet.

By the time you’ve toweled off and gotten dressed, you can hear the boys beginning to traipse back into the house. From what you can make out, they’re making dinner plans, and you poke your head out curiously when Jimin mentions you by name.

“What are you saying about me?” you ask, narrowing your eyes accusingly at your brother.

Jimin whirls around, his cherubic face a perfect picture of innocence. “Nothing! I was just talking about your fried rice and how good it is…”

“You’re trying to get me to make you dinner,” you sigh. “I knew it.”

“No, we’ll help!” your brother promises. “I swear, as soon as I get out of the shower, I’ll chop all the vegetables.”

“Sure you will,” you snort, brushing past him and heading for the kitchen.

Much to your surprise, the kitchen is already occupied when you arrive. Jungkook and Yugyeom are at the counter—the former poised with a knife at the ready, about to slice into an onion. The latter is digging through the cabinets, and both turn at the sound of your footsteps.

“Hey,” Yugyeom says. “You probably know where the bottle opener is, right?”

You nod. “Left of the sink, second drawer down.” Then you turn your attention to Jungkook, peering curiously over his shoulder. “What’s the onion for?”

“Dinner,” he replies, flashing you a crooked little smile. “We’re making fried rice, aren’t we?”

Your heart skips a beat in your chest and races to catch up, thumping erratically against your ribcage. It’s hard to ignore the warmth blossoming in your belly—near impossible to ignore the butterflies that have made a home there—but you somehow manage to school your expression into something passably neutral and busy yourself with the other vegetables on the counter. “I see Jimin got to you, too. Is the other cutting board clean?”

Jungkook nods, jabbing a thumb in the direction of the dish rack. “Washed it last night, yeah. It’s all yours, Noona.”

You hum and skirt around Yugyeom to grab the clean board and another knife. Chopping vegetables goes a lot faster with two people, and Yugyeom does his part by cracking open two bottles of beer and plunking one down next to each of you before opening a third for himself. “Hydrate,” he orders, and you roll your eyes before picking it up and taking a sip.

It doesn’t take long to finish making dinner. As promised, Jimin joins you as soon as he’s out of the shower, plucking the knife out of your hand and nudging you aside so he can finish cutting the vegetables. You fire up the stove and drizzle some oil into a pan, and smile when Taehyung brings you the container of leftover rice and a large serving bowl.

“You know what we should do?” Minho asks as you’re all sitting down to eat. Yugyeom’s opened more beers, and Jimin’s brought out the wine as well. Jungkook is spooning out fried rice for everyone, and you accept the bowl he hands you with a murmur of thanks before looking at Minho expectantly.

“What should we do?”

“Go to the beach,” he replies, tilting the remainder of his beer back into his mouth. “It’s only an hour away, isn’t it?”

“Closer to half an hour without traffic,” Jimin corrects. “But, yeah, we should go. That would be fun.”

By the time dinner is finished, you’ve finalized plans to drive down to the beach in the morning. “Remember, we’re leaving at ten,” you tell Jimin, elbowing him in the ribs. “That means you have to wake up before ten.”

“I know!” your brother whines, rubbing the spot where you elbowed him with a grimace. “Jeez, Noona. I’m good at waking up. It’s Jungkook and Tae you have to worry about.”

“Says the punk who takes hour-long showers,” you snark. “What are you gonna do when you have to pay your own water bills, huh?”

“Shower at your place,” he replies smugly. “You can’t turn me away. I’m your brother.”

“Please, that’s exactly why I can turn you away, you little mooch.”

“You love me!”

“Really? You wanna test that theory?”

The remainder of the evening passes in a blur of booze and board games, unearthed from the closet in the hall. Despite your collective agreement to go to bed early, it’s past midnight when you finally bid everyone goodnight and crawl underneath your covers. Shutting your eyes, you will your brain to settle and your limbs to relax, and you’re on the verge of drifting off when your phone suddenly buzzes. Lazily, you roll over and snatch the device off the nightstand, taking in the late hour before your eyes flit down to the new notification and go wide.

[1:02am] Jungkook: IMG_497

You freeze, thumb hovering just above the message. Even when your screen goes dark again, you can’t erase the sight of his name lighting up your phone, the attachment sitting there like a taunt. You shouldn’t open it. You can’t open it.

But curiosity gnaws at your belly, fraying the edges of your resolve. Slowly, you wake the screen, watching as Jungkook’s name fills it once more. You hesitate, bottom lip finding its way between your teeth.

And then your phone buzzes again, several times in quick succession.

[1:04am] Jungkook: i miss you, noona

[1:04am] Jungkook: miss your pretty face

[1:04am] Jungkook: miss how tight your pussy felt around my fingers

You drop the device as if scorched. It takes several moments to gather your wits again, but when you do, pick up your phone, clicking on his name and scrolling up to the attachment. In the darkness of your bedroom, you watch with bated breath as it downloads.

“Fuck.”

The expletive slips past your lips, unbidden, but you can’t help it. Jungkook stares out at you from the photograph illuminating your screen, his eyes hooded and his lips curled into a devious smirk. He’s in the shared bathroom between your bedrooms, and even though it’s dark inside, the flash of his camera is just enough to illuminate the distinctive palm tree patterned shower curtain behind him.

But, you aren’t focused on that.

No, your focus is zeroed in on the foreground of the photo, where you can perfectly make out the head of Jungkook’s cock, sticky and leaking copiously from between his fingers.

“Fuck,” you repeat, louder this time.

And as if reading your mind, another text flashes onto your screen.

[1:07am] Jungkook: wish your pretty little pussy was stretched around my cock right now, princess

You aren’t sure what possesses you to send the response you do, but your thumbs are moving before the more rational side of your brain can catch up and stop you.

[1:07am] You: why don’t you come over and make it happen then?

You’ve only just hit send when the bathroom door swings open, revealing Jungkook standing there in nothing but sweatpants. His face is illuminated in the stark white light shining from his screen, his eyes dark and his smirk even darker. Every movement drips with intent, from the way his lips quirk upward to the way he saunters over to join you on your bed, dropping his phone somewhere amongst the rumpled sheets. The room goes dark.

And then…

“Hey, princess.”

His lips are at your ear, hot breath caressing your cheeks and sending shivers down the length of your spine. The mattress dips beneath his weight as he joins you, a hand finding your bare thigh before sliding up to grasp your hip. Only an oversized t-shirt and a thin pair of cotton panties shield you from his roving fingers, and you can tell from the pleased curve of his mouth that he isn’t going to let either stand in his way. One hand slips beneath the hem of your shirt, dancing along your ribcage, and you let out a breathy gasp when he trails up and skims along the soft skin just below the swell of your breasts.

“Been thinking about you all night, you know,” Jungkook whispers, pushing up your shirt and peppering kisses along every inch of newly revealed flesh. “Been thinking about how pretty you looked, cumming around my fingers, and how much prettier you’d look cumming around my cock.”

Your shirt is long forgotten by this point, tugged overhead and thrown carelessly over his shoulder. Jungkook hauls you closer, slotting himself between your spread legs, and you shiver when he presses the pad of his thumb against your clothed clit, the material uncomfortably damp as it clings to your folds.

“Jungkook—” His name escapes you in an airy whisper. “Please.”

Even in the darkness, you can see the satisfied, self-assured tilt of his lips. “Such a good girl for me,” he croons, leaning down to press a kiss to your waiting mouth. His free hand comes up to cup your cheek while the other remains between your legs, and you gasp sharply when he digs his thumb a little harder against your clit, circling the sensitive bud.

Jungkook seizes upon the opportunity to slip his tongue past your lips, licking into your mouth with unrestrained ardor. Your panties are peeled away, the cottony material disappearing right alongside the pressure of his thumb, and the inadvertent whine that escapes you has him chuckling darkly in his throat.

“What is it, princess?” Jungkook rasps, his voice dipping several pitches. “You have to tell me what you want, remember?”

You clutch at his wrist weakly, tugging it back between your legs until he finally indulges you and resumes his lazy revolutions around your clit. “Want you,” you whisper. “Want you inside me.”

Jungkook lets out a pleased hum, rewarding you with a single finger that he slips into your sopping entrance, your juices aiding the smooth glide as he curls it up in search of the spot that’ll have you seeing stars. “See? That wasn’t so hard, was it?”

“No, it wasn’t,” you agree shakily. “But it looks like you are, so why don’t you let me help you out?”

Jungkook chuckles softly, his lips ghosting across the swell of your cheek. “Oh, yeah? And how exactly do you plan on helping me?”

Slowly, you reach down, letting your fingers graze the sizable bulge in his sweatpants. “You said it yourself, didn’t you? Me, stretched around your cock?”

A low groan escapes him when you give him a firm stroke, your fingers barely meeting around his length. “On your back,” he commands hoarsely, nudging you backward until you’re nestled into your pillows. Freeing his erection from the confines of his sweatpants, he settles comfortably between your spread legs, the mattress groaning in protest at the shift in weight.

“Wait,” you whisper, grabbing his wrist. “Did you hear that?”

His face scrunches in confusion. “Hear what?” he asks, as if he’s never heard that particular string of words before. “Are you sure it wasn’t just—”

He stops mid-sentence, and you both hear it again—the unmistakable creaking of bedsprings from next door. “Shit!” you hiss, scrambling back on the mattress until you’re nearly pressed against the headboard. “Oh, god. That’s Jimin. He’s going to kill you if he finds you in here—”

On the other side of the wall, the door to the shared bathroom opens, the light flickering on and illuminating the crack beneath your door. You hear your brother cursing sleepily under his breath as the toilet lid clatters open, and nearly shove Jungkook off the bed in your haste to get him out of your room.

“You have to go,” you whisper frantically, herding him toward the door that leads out into the hall.

Jungkook hurriedly pulls his pants back over his hips, and you can practically see him willing his erection to go away. “What am I supposed to say if he asks?”

“I don’t know! Pretend you were going for a glass of water or something!”

With a final push, you shove him out of your bedroom, leaning against the door with a relieved sigh when it clicks shut behind him. You hear Jungkook shuffle off just as Jimin flushes, and cast a prayer up to any deities that may exist as you listen to him wash his hands. And it seems your prayers are answered, as quiet descends over the house once more. Off in the distance, you think you hear Minho snoring.

Letting out another sigh, you return to bed, crawling beneath the covers and getting comfortable. And when sleep finally takes you, you dream of Jeon Jungkook.

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