#it irks me even more that we’ll probably never get a ‘do you have any idea how special your son is?’ parallel but this time with JJ

[missmouse43]

Remember when we all thought Mike and Anna would play a major role in Jiara’s angst this season? 🤡

[jazzthatonewriterchick]

Lovers & Friends (18+ Fic)

Pairing: Keigo Takami x Black!Fem!Reader (Friends to Lovers)

Synopsis: In which you and Keigo have begun to realize the strange new feelings you both have for each other after one drunken night at a close friend’s wedding that ends with you in his bed, but because of your longtime friendship and committed relationships with other people, you’re more than happy to forget that night even happened and keep your mutual feelings in the dark…for now, at least. 

Story Warnings: Smutty smut; 18+ (MINORS GET AWAY); Cheating/Infidelity; Mating; Light Degradation; Spanking; Exhibitionism; Multiple Positions; Creampie; Unprotected PIV Sex; Facials; Scent Play; Marking; Spitting; Deepthroating; Cunnilingus; Begging; Edgeplay; Power Play; Daddy Kink; Some Angst; Hurt/Comfort; Mild Violence

Disclaimer: I own none of the characters mentioned in this fic (except for Rei and Haruko). However, as this is my writing, I do not give permission for my work to be reposted on any other sites that are not from my own accounts. Thank you!

Writer's Note: Just as note, Dabi isn't a member of LOV in this fic. I explain all of it in the chapter, but I didn't want to make him a villain in this fic, mostly cuz that's my baby daddy & he deserves better. Enjoy! -Jazz

Chapters: One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Seven. Eight. Nine. Ten. Eleven. Twelve. Thirteen. Fourteen. Fifteen. Sixteen. Seventeen. Eighteen. Nineteen. Twenty. Bonus Chapter.

Read on AO3 here!

************

Chapter Four: We're All Friends Here.

“Can you stop doing that, please?” Rei sighs from behind the wheel of his Benz. 

You, sitting in the passenger’s seat beside him, barely spare him a glance. “Doing what?” you ask dryly.

You watch as trees and cars whiz by as Rei drives slightly above the speed limit to get to Fatgum’s wedding. Your feet are up on the dashboard, your painted toes in some sexy-looking Steve Madden heels to match your peach-colored sundress and go along with your braids that you tied up in a bun on your head. 

“Acting like you’re not pissed when you are,” Rei replies. He clenches the wheel so tight that his knuckles are white. “Look, I said I was sorry, Y/N, but I can’t help that I lost my wallet.” 

“No, you can’t,” you begin, about to drag his ass to hell and back, “but you can help that you didn’t show up on time when you specifically told me 9 AM and showed up at 11 PM. The wedding started at 11 PM, Rei.” 

“I’m aware of that,” he growls, forced to stop at a red light. “That’s why I’m hurrying as fast as I can without risking getting a ticket. Cut me some lack, Y/N. I was out patrolling last night.” 

You turn to him, irked. Despite how clean and handsome he looks in his crisp button-down to match your dress, slacks, and red-bottom shoes, that does nothing to distract you from your anger. You had promised Keigo you’d show up on time and you never go back on your promises unless something serious happens. So for Rei to not respect that and make this about his lost wallet (which he found under his car seat later) is really starting to work your nerve.

“You didn’t have to come with me today, Rei,” you say, bite in your tone. “I told you you didn’t have to last night, but you refused. Now we’re two hours late for the wedding! Fatgum is probably already married by now!” 

“We’ll get there,” Rei reassures you, pressing down on the gas as soon as the traffic light flicks to green. “Just chill out, okay? I don’t want us going in here mad at each other.” You feel his hand move to squeeze your knee, but you don’t move to hold his hand or push it away. You try to act like it’s not there, like some pestering fly. 

There is a part of you that feels guilty for being so mad at your boyfriend. You know you can’t help what comes with the job as a pro, but you also know he can sure as hell take off from a night of patrolling, especially on the night before a very important event for you, which he said he’d attend. Even you got your patrols and other pro work out the way this week to prepare for Fatgum’s wedding. 

Rei’s decisions only validate what is more important to him than you are: his ranking. While you understand the pressure he’s under to be the best in the eyes of the public and the Hero’s Commission, you also understand that there is more to life than just a higher popularity number.

Like healthy communication and good sex. And while Rei is a great pro and an even better person, he doesn’t understand that more is needed to be a good boyfriend. 

Your mood only gets lower and lower with every passing minute as you sink deeper into your thoughts. You wonder how it’s possible to have a relationship like Fatgum and Haruko’s. How do two people survive for six years? When do you realize you want to be with someone for the rest of your life? How does it happen? 

You’re hoping for answers when Rei finally gets to the park and parks his car in the lot. By the time you get out of the car, fix your hair, and get Fatgum and Haruko’s wedding gift, the reception has already started. Everyone is now out and about, enjoying the dance floor. Some are on the dance floor, enjoying the tunes the DJ is spinning, while others are lounging at their tables or enjoying the pleasures of the park by snapping photos in the gazebos or taking walks. 

Others are circling the snack table where you find Fatgum and Haruko standing at their large, towering wedding cake drizzled in strawberry and vanilla frosting. Fatgum kisses Haruko’s cheek as they cut the first slice together, their wedding bands glinting in the sun. He catches sight of you and gives you a wink, glad to see you. 

The long snack table they stand at is covered in delicacies and expensive foods only Fatgum thought to add: fruit and cracker towers; charcuterie plates; bowls of salads and soups; spreads of potato salad, collard greens, mac n’ cheese, and every meat and fish known to man: ribeye steaks, grilled salmon, tilapia, chicken, and fried wings coated in hot sauce. Your stomach growls and you realize you haven’t eaten yet. 

“Y/N!” someone calls to you. You find Rumi waving you over to a table where she, Keigo, Sakura, Yu, and Nemuri are all sitting. Keigo is the first to greet you and you have to say that the man certainly knows how to clean up: he looks incredibly handsome in his tailored black suit and red bottom shoes. 

The scent of his cologne fills your nose as you hug him, tickling your senses. “Glad you finally made it,” he says, giving you an adoring smile. Seeing his face seems to make everything better until you notice his smile falter a bit at the sight of Rei behind you. “Tempo!” he happily greets, putting his hand out for a shake. “So you decided to join us losers today.” 

Rei’s eyes tick to Keigo’s hand hesitantly before he slowly takes it, as if unsure if the winged pro is serious with his cordial attitude or not. “Promised to be her date. Of course, I’d show up.” You inwardly sigh, already knowing that Rei’s dislike for Keigo will be an issue today. For some reason, he just doesn’t like your best friend. 

Rumi sidles up to you in her red dress, looking like a damn Amazon. “I bet,” she snickers, “with you lookin’ like that. Tryna take someone else home tonight, sexy?”

You shoo her away with a laugh before walking over to the table where Yu, Nemuri, and Sakura sit, Fatgum and Haruko’s wedding gift still in your hands. “Hey,” you greet, hugging each girl. “Sorry we’re so late. You take pictures of the wedding?” 

“Absolutely!” Nemuri giggles, already moving to show you the slew of pictures on her phone. Your heart melts at the sight of Eri as the flower girl and Fatgum slipping a wedding band onto Haruko’s finger. How you would’ve loved to witness such a beautiful moment! Now, you’re pissed at Rei even more. “But you’re here now!” Yu says with a bright smile. “And you look just as amazing as Sakura does.” 

Sakura blushes at the compliment. “She is right about that,” you giggle, sitting down next to the pink-haired girl. “You do look amazing.” Sakura giggles softly, reminding you of the cutest fairy: tiny, innocent, and pure. “Thank you, but your outfit definitely beats mine with those shoes. I’d die if I walked in those things.” 

Keigo takes a seat between you and Sakura, a new glass of champagne in his hand. You look around, noticing the empty seat that belongs to your renowned good guy, ex-villain friend. “Dabi couldn’t make it?” you mutter to him. 

“More like he couldn’t bribe the warden to give him back his perks after that riot, but he’s workin’ on it,” Keigo whispers back before taking a big gulp of champagne.

You sit back in your seat, disappointed that Dabi won’t be coming, but you should’ve known something would go wrong. He is in prison, after all. 

Dabi has been in your life just as long as Keigo and Rumi. While you met Keigo long before UA, you met Dabi and Rumi at the same time while attending UA for high school. Dabi, you went by Touya Todoroki back then, was training to be a hero and took a liking to you three almost immediately. It was the four of you all day, every day; a special quartet…. 

That is the one day Dabi cracked when his baby brother Shoto was born and his shit father Enji aka no. 1 pro Endeavor became more fond of him than Dabi. After that, he ditched the white hair for stark black, stayed to himself, and started skipping classes until he was finally kicked out. You had no idea what happened. 

Years later when Shoto started attending UA himself was when Dabi finally showed back up. When you and Keigo were called about a LOV attack downtown, you were beyond dumbfounded to see your old friend, all scars and staples, his beautiful, porcelain skin ruined. Even more dumbfounded to realize that he was now a villain and was against his friends. You had cried for weeks over this, being held by Keigo and Rumi, the only two who understood the pain and guilt you felt over Dabi’s new life path. 

However, that was then. Dabi has since changed his tune. After exposing Endeavor’s abusive past to all of Japan and getting him blackballed, Dabi sacrificed himself to save Shoto from a villain attack orchestrated by the LOV, nearly getting killed.

He was in a coma for a month after that. You, Keigo, and Rumi were right there beside him all that time. When he awakened, it was as if he had completely flipped a switch. You don’t know what he experienced while in his coma, but it caused him to wash out his hair dye, leave LOV, and turn himself into the police for his wrongdoings. “I have to atone for my sins,” was all he said. 

It was all over the news for weeks until, like all news, it faded over time. Because Dabi saved Shoto’s life, he and his family (minus Endeavor) implored the judge to shorten his sentence of 50 years behind bars. Now, as part of his deal, Dabi is in prison until his 40th birthday with the possibility of parole with good behavior. Since then, you’ve been visiting and calling him, making sure he’s keeping up with his good track record. 

The last time you saw him was a month ago over drinks. He had strode in with his snow-white hair and an ankle monitor on his ankle that would shock the fuck out of him if he tried to run. As part of his perks, he is given one day of freedom outside of prison every two weeks. He was saving up his days to visit after Fatgum’s wedding, but things took a negative turn when a riot thrown by quirked inmates broke out a week ago. Believing Dabi was the one who orchestrated it, the warden ��momentarily” took away Dabi’s perks.

But Dabi is smart, so you know he has some tricks up his sleeve. He was a villain, after all. 

But damn, you wish he was here now to liven up this terribly tense silence that settles on the table. Yu and Nemuri look at Rumi who stares at Keigo who stares at Rei who stares right back at him. You gnaw at your bottom lip, the urge to flee too much. “So, Sakura!” you squeak, cutting through the horrible silence. “How’s work going for you?” 

Sakura looks almost glad that you asked, obviously feeling the tension too. “As soon as it can go when you’re working as a nurse plus customer service,” she sighs tiredly. “I do it for the kids, but those parents try my nerves.” 

“I definitely get it,” you reply empathetically. “As a pro, you have to work well with people too, especially when patrolling.” Sakura’s eyes light up at the mention of your hero work. “Speaking of which, will you be attending the Heroes’ Gala later next month? Are you up for any awards?” 

“Yep!” you proudly say. “I’m up for best fighter, so I’ve been really trying to go hard with my training.”

Keigo smirks at you. “I got the bruises to prove it,” he chuckles, alluding to your training sessions that have taken a pause due to Fatgum’s wedding and because you didn’t want to give Keigo any more bruises that he couldn’t cover. Yet another reason why Rei strongly dislikes your friend: your closeness. He doesn’t quite understand that this is just the relationship you and Keigo share. It’s like the bond between brother and sister. 

“What about you, Rei?” Sakura asks. Rei smiles at her, and you can tell he’s overjoyed that she asked. “I’m nominated for most fearless,” he proudly states as he sips his champagne. “Then at the end of the year, I’m heading for no. 8. That’s why I’ve been working like the world is gonna end lately. Y/N definitely knows.” 

You duck your head to hide your irked expression. “Yeah,” you mutter before you can stop yourself. “I definitely know.” Luckily, only Keigo and Rumi hear you and share a look between each other. One of them has to get you out of here before you start stabbing your boyfriend. “Seesh, look at that waterfall!” Rumi hollers, pointing to the foundation at the snack table overflowing with chocolate fondu and surrounded by guests. 

“Y/N, help me fight to get at that fondu fountain. My sweet tooth is talkin’ to me.” Rumi gets out of her seat and loops your arm in hers, dragging you away from the table. “Bring back some wings!” Keigo shouts after you both as you walk away from the group and head towards the snack table. 

As you do, Rumi snatches a glass of champagne from a random tray and hands it to you. “Had to get you out of there,” she whispers. “That shit was awkward. You looked like you were about to choke Rei out.” 

“I can’t help it,” you groan defeatedly. “This morning was a shit show! It wasn’t the fact he lost his wallet, but he showed up so late when he promised he’d be at our condo by 9. I missed the wedding because of his negligence.” 

“Seems like he’s been negligent with a few things lately,” Rumi replies knowingly. “I can tell. When he’s over, all I hear is him and no you.” You stare at her wide-eyed. “Yes, I can hear y’all have sex, Y/N,” she chuckles, pointing at her ears. “With these things, I can hear a tree fall in the forest.” 

“That’s so embarrassing,” you groan. You’re not sure if you’re referring to the fact that your friend has heard you and your boyfriend have sex or to the fact that you’re crickets compared to Rei.  “So I’m guessin’ the sex has been lacking too?” Rumi questions, raising a brow when you finally make it to the snack table. 

You busy yourself with gathering some salad with a side of grilled chicken and potato salad to hide your embarrassment. “It’s only because he’s been working so hard to get his award and a high rank,” you say in a hushed tone for Rumi’s ears only. “And when we do have sex, he’s not as attentive as I want him to be. Either that or I’m not connecting with him.” 

Rumi scowls confusedly at you, a kabob of fruit for fondu in her hand. “I’m not following.”

You sigh, realizing you’ll have to be a bit clearer. “I love Rei,” you explain, “but I feel nothing when we have sex. When we kiss or have any other physical contact that isn’t sexual, I get the urge to fuck him, but when I actually do it, there are no fireworks setting off in my head.” 

Even saying it makes you feel ill. “Sex is a big part of relationships for me. Without that, what do we have?”

Rumi whistles lowly, a hand on her toned hip. “A very dry relationship in need of some lubin’ up,” she replies. “Either that or just dumb the guy.” You glare at her angrily and she puts her hands up in defense. “Look, I know you don’t want to break up with him over this, but if you’re this upset over it, why even bother? You don’t even look happy, girl!” 

You want to point out to Rumi that it isn’t like Rei is a casual hookup or a guy you’ve only been dating for a few weeks. You’ve been together for a year! You have history and he’s truly a great boyfriend despite the dry spell and your feelings of being neglected because of his work. “I love him, Rumi,” you say, exasperated, “and I wanna try with him.” 

That’s all the reason you give Rumi but it’s enough to shut her up. “Give me some advice,” you plead. “You have good sex, right? And don’t act like you don’t ‘cause you’re not exactly quiet either.” 

You raise a knowing brow at her. Many times you’ve heard the bunny hero going at it in her bedroom with her hookups of the week, most of them during nights when you’re in need of sleep before work. 

Rumi gives you a sheepish smile. “Guilty as charged,” she chuckles. “Well, have you ever talked to him about your kinks?” 

Her simple question makes you reach back into the furthest parts of your brain for an answer. Have you talked about your kinks with Rei? You’ve tried the handcuffs, but since that didn’t work, kink never saw the light of day again in your relationship.

However, you can’t remember ever flat-out telling him you loved spankings or for a guy to spit on your pussy. And what about your degradation kink? Or your desire for exhibitionism? He’d look at you like you’re crazy! 

You shake your head silently at Rumi. “Start there then,” she encourages. “Or maybe try to do something more adventurous with him to spice things up. That usually always works.” She passes you a fresh glass of champagne. “I’d suggest gettin’ some alcohol in him first.” 

You turn back to stare at Rei, finding him chatting with Jeanist and Ms. Joke. Nervous butterflies flutter in your stomach at Rumi’s advice, but it’s something you know will probably be easier than you believe it will be…right? 

“Hey, you two!” Keigo grabs you and Rumi’s attention, looking impatient. “You gonna gossip or get some wings for me? I need some before I pick either one of you as a dance partner.” He wiggles his eyebrows suggestively at both of you and begins subtly moving his hips to the band playing a cover of Rihanna, the lead singer crooning into the mic. 

Rumi looks at him in playful disgust. “With your big ass wings?” she scoffs. “No, thanks. You’d knock me over.” Keigo gives her a mock offended look as she sashays by him, heading back to the table. “Come on, you two!” she shouts over her shoulder. 

You inwardly groan, not wanting to sit back down in the awkwardness of that table. But when Keigo gives you that reassuring smile that everything will be okay, all of that dread vanishes. “Well, she’s waiting for us, baby bird.” He hooks his arm through yours, smiling at you. “Better not keep her waiting.” 

Without another word, you let Keigo drag you back to the table with your food and much-needed champagne in hand. 

[ember373]

4/8/23 4:08 pm

Hmmm…interesting date and time. I’ll ponder over that another time…

I just finished an erotic vampire/werewolf novel. I really shouldn’t read those. They get me all worked up and remind me of what I’ve been missing all these years. The primal love. That physical closeness. That feeling of desiring someone and being desired back. It makes me ache. In more than one place. My heart…between my legs…ugh.

It makes me wonder tho. That physical desire is such an important thing, why does A stay? It’s been over a year since he claims he’s had any sex, yet he stays. Why is that? Am I worth it? Of course, this is if he is actually speaking the truth about not having any since we met. But I do believe him. I’m just not sure if it’s because I just really want to believe him. I’m not sure if there’s that much of a difference anymore.

I have two theories.

We’ll start with the worst one first. And that is that he really doesn’t feel that much of a need for sex. Since he doesn’t feel that need as intensely then maybe he just keeps me around because it’s fun to play with me and I give him a sense of superiority. He has control and power over me and that can be quite addicting I would suppose. He’s just biding his time until either his mom forces him to go on dates or he finds someone himself. Why not play around and get his kinky satisfaction before then?

The other theory…I’m not sure actually if it’s better or not. The more I think about it, the more I can’t wrap around my head around someone just keeping me around for fucks sake unless they either are playing with me or…they love me. He knows if I leave, I’ll come back. I’m his. There’s a solidness in that. I think maybe he can almost rely on it? But you know… I do seem to think like it’s not always necessarily me begging to come back. I mean, it is, but it’s because he’s opened that door waiting for me to step in and do it. And because I love him, I do. I feel that maybe he does need me and I’m more than happy to always go back and love him more. I sometimes wonder if I really left-what would he do? Would it upset him? Or would he just shrug and move on?

I think…his seeming indifference sometimes is because he doesn’t want to be vulnerable. He’s been hurt so bad and doesn’t want to be hurt again. And I want to be with him with everything I am but… I mean… doesn’t he deserve better? More? I’m past my prime. There’s nothing remotely sexy about me. I can’t even do things right and I don’t try hard enough. I’m depressed as fuck which saps up energy I could use trying to please him. *sigh*

And this whole just waiting for him to leave me thing is killing me. It’s just an axe hanging over my head-when will the final blow be? Will today be the day he decides to end things? Will it be tomorrow? How long can this last without physical touch? I mean…he didn’t even want to come see me in AZ. I wasn’t worth the effort. So why does he keep me around? I don’t get it. I’m trying to prepare myself for the devastation. I know the loss of him in my life will devastate me. I also know I probably can’t ever have him so that loss is inevitable. It makes everything feel so…unreal. Why am I alive? I just don’t see a point anymore. Can I take the place of someone who’s fate is at it’s end? Give someone who wants to live the chance at life? It’s such a waste on me.

Trapped in a marriage I hate. In love with someone who most likely doesn’t love me back and never will and will drop me at any moment. My kids don’t really need me. I’m estranged from my family for the most part. My in laws irk me. My friends have their own lives and other friends and it’s so easy for me to slip out of people lives with my silence. Can I just slip out of this one and not have one anymore? Can I just not exist anymore? I don’t even have a job I love anymore. There’s nothing for me. Everything I do is for other people. My existence is for other people. I’m tired of it. If the universe doesn’t feel I deserve anything, can’t it let me go? Why does it have to be so cruel and keep me going…

All this from an erotic novel. Ffs. I had so many eloquent thoughts and insights in my head and when I sat down to type them…garbage. What’s the point anymore then? I can’t even whine properly anymore.

[chilumi-shipper]

When Mommy's Resting

Diluc x Fem!Reader

Warning: Smut, NSFW, Mommy Kink, Consensual Somnophilia, Sub Diluc, Dom Mommy Reader, Overstimulation, Oral Sex (Reader Receiving)

Summary: To most people, Diluc was a man of mystery, a strong, rich and handsome business man who seems to always be stoic, but within the space of your own home, he is just sensitive baby who likes getting you to ride his dick. He was obedient, until of course he was put under the influence of the Cavalry Captain.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

Diluc was done for the night, he sighed, it was a long day bartending at the tavern, he can't wait to just go home to you and cuddle up to mommy.

As he was cleaning up, he thought if you were still awake at this hour. 'Probably not, she did tell me that she has a lot of things to do with Cyrus and the others in the Adventurer's Guild, she must be tired.'

As he was wiping down the counter, he heard the door of the tavern open and close, and an unwanted guest stood right in front of him. The Cavalry Captain, Kaeya, who seems to wear a smirk quite different from his usual grin.

"Diluc, good you're still here." The blue haired man walked up to him, arms crossed with mischief painted on his feature.

"We're closed, better get going, Sir Kaeya." Diluc said with a rather tensed and irritated voice. But that only seemed to amuse the knight.

"Ohh, I see." The blue haired man still sat on a stool in front of his brother though. "Eager to see your Mommy back at the Dawn Winery?" Diluc froze up, looking at the former with a shocked expression that seemed to irk him even more.

"I d-don't know what you're talking about." Diluc stuttered, turning away from his brother and pretended to clean up the other parts of the counter.

The Cavalry Captain chuckled, "She told me." 'No, she wouldn't, my Y/N would never.' "Told me about what goes around you guys, pretty interesting. It makes me quite jealous, my flings aren't usually comfortable with that kind of relationship." He continued and Diluc's clenched his hand in frustration. You did tell him! And now that one eyed punk is gonna try to gt you from him.

He looked back at the smirking man and glared. "Don't get any ideas, bastard." He'll never let anyone steal you from him.

"Relax, brother. Although I am quite interested in that kind of relationship, I'm quite sure she doesn't like anyone but you." Kaeya laughed, "However, she did tell me another thing. You're a bit too obedient aren't you?" Diluc felt uncomfortable, sure when you tell him that he's a good boy, kiss his forehead and pat his head while you ride him, he feels so good about himself, other people telling him just makes him uneasy.

"This is between me and her, it's non of your business, Kaeya." He said in a serious tone. "I'd rather not talk about this." Diluc straightened up, finished up cleaning and walked away from his brother.

As he was about to leave though, the knight stopped him. "Don't you want to contribute more on that relationship, she seems to be the only one putting in actual effort." Kaeya stated to him. He smiled when Diluc stopped and sighed.

"Alright, what do you have in mind?"

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

He can't believe it, why is he doing this?

Did you think he was boring? Maybe you complained to Kaeya about him and his brother is just giving him a boost.

Yeah, maybe that's it.

Well, anyway, as he watched your sleeping figure, Diluc smiled a bit, you look so beautiful, like an angel, and now he's supposed to take you this way.

Being honest to himself, he is so excited! You two have always been so comfortable around each other, to the pint where he basically knows that you won't mind what he's doing right now, taking of your garments that didn't even cover much in the first place.

He loves seeing your naked body, you perfect boobs that he loves to suck on when you shove his face onto your chest, your skin with a few stretch marks that only he's been able to see, your plump thighs that you squeeze around his head whenever you order him to eat you out, and then, your pretty little cunt, just made for him and his cock, the juices you make are like a sweet tasty treat just for him.

Diluc can't wait to taste it again.

Gently spreading you're legs apart, he was met by your slightly wet pussy, he can practically feel his mouth watering with hunger for you. Diluc tested the waters buy liking your clit with the tip of his tongue, you didn't move. He felt his heartbeat increasing by the second. He was still afraid to wake you up, deep down, he wants to keep his title as your good boy despite him defiling you right now.

'Fuck it.' And he just shoves his face between your legs, lapping your juices and sucking on your clit. He can hear you let out a few whimpers, Diluc's never heard that before! Usually you're the one that always makes him moan and scream, this time he can actually hear you make lewd sounds! And boy does he love it, the noises you make irks him on even more.

He sucked even harder on your clit and that's when you let out a moan that just straight up went to his cock.

"D-Diluc?" He looked up and there you were, with tired eyes that looked so so cute. But he didn't stop sucking though and you kept moaning. "Ughh, baby.... Mhhhm, baby, what are you- Ohhh!" His tongue grazed your hole, which made you jump. And now you're holding his head and shoving it down even more, as you grind your cunt on his face. "Ohhh, that feels so good, Luc." You moaned out.

Diluc loves it, the way you just grind on him mouth, loves how much juices your giving him. He just really loves you.

And you came hard on his mouth, which he of course as a good boy, swallowed.

Your head fell back onto the bed. Tired from your post orgasm. You felt your Diluc suck a few more times to clean up your cunt before slipping beside you.

You rised up and open your arms for him, and he gladly welcomed himself into your warmth, laying his head between your boobies.

"What was that for, love?" You asked him. He felt his heart clench. Did you not like it? And now he's gonna lose his good boy privileges.

"You didn't feel good, Mommy?" He asked with a broken tone, looking up at you to see that you're already staring at him.

"Of course I did, silly!" You laughed a little, "I think I was just surprised, my baby boy, doing something so naughty." You booped his nose as he smiled a little.

When you told Kaeya about Diluc and your kinks and stuff, you knew he was gonna go to Diluc to embarrass and probably suggest something to him. But you never expected Kaeya to tell Diluc to eat you out in your sleep!

You did purposely do that so Diluc would have motivation for a little spice. And you got it, and boy did it feel amazing.

"But was I good?"

"You always are, baby."

With that, he nuzzled his face at your chest lovingly.

"But..."

His ears perked up. "It's not fair that Mommy's the only one to cum right?" You asked teasingly.

And then he felt it, the painfully hard cock still confined within his pants. You start to rub it with your leg.

You are gonna give him a lot tonight.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

"Ahhh... Mommy, please.... ughh." You stroked his messy red hair as you savagely went up and down on his cock, squeezing it so good with your delicious pussy walls.

And he let out a low grunt as he came once again, he's so tired from cumming so many times inside you already. But just looking at your face and down to where you two connect makes him hard all over again. It just feels too good to stop.

"That's right." You roll your hips around before slamming back down to take all of him. "Moan for me, baby. Tell Mommy what you want." You grabbed his hands and guide them to cup and fondle your boobs as you ride him.

He came so many times that there's only a little bit coming out when he hits his peak.

"P-please, make me cum inside you again." He said while holding back a few moans.

He lets out a growl after he came out for the last time and you felt his seed pour into your cunt that's already full of his cum.

Getting up from his dick, his and your cum starts to drip down your thighs.

You sat down between his legs and spread you thighs to show him your pussy stuffed full of your shared cum. "Oh, baby. Look at that, you came so much, huh?" You giggled as it dripped out of you.

"M-Mommy, please keep it inside." He whispered in a low voice, making you smile even more. Exhaustion was shown all over his features. You knew that he did feel better if you keep all his cum inside you every time you make him cum so many times.

You giggled again, "Alright, baby. Go to sleep, maybe we'll do this again tomorrow morning." He nodded before closing his eyes.

But before you can even lay next to him, his eyes opened up immediately.

"Why did you tell Kaeya?"

Oh, right. Hehe.

[i-just-like-goats]

Levi x Female Reader Angst to Fluff

Summary: happy endings are never a guarantee in the world Levi lives in

Warnings: mentions of death

WC: 0.9k

Main Masterlist

“We’ll never have our happy ending you know,”

“I know, which is why we should make the most of the time we do have,”

Those were your words to him when you revealed your feelings. He had told you that the feelings were returned but warned you of the uncertainty of the relationship lasting due to the nature of your jobs in the scout regiment. That didn’t stop you from loving him with all of your heart. But as he previously warned, his fears came to fruition.

“Where is she?”

“Levi. I don’t think you should see her right no-”

“Where. Is. She?” Levi repeated with more weight on his words.

“She’s still recovering. We don’t know if she’ll make it,”

“Just let me see her. Please,”

Levi’s desperate expression made Hange sigh in defeat.

“She’s in the critical care wing,”

Levi strode to where you were. He paused at the closed door, preparing himself to see your injured state. There you lay, bandages almost covering your whole body. Levi was not one to cry, but seeing your broken body made his eyes water.

“What happened?” Levi whispered.

“The colossal titan transformed. She was the nearest to the transformation which resulted in burn wounds of varying degrees from the heat and energy expelled by the titan’s transformation. Currently we’re just waiting to see if she wakes up, her pulse is still there but we may need to prepare for the worst,” one of the nurses said.

Too stunned to formulate a verbal response, Levi nodded with a blank expression as the nurse left to tend for the others that were close to the colossal titan.

Day by day, Levi sat by your bed every waking hour to be there for when you awoke. As the days dragged on, the others already woke up and were now moving and walking around. But still no response from you.

A week and a half passed and the doctors were ready to pronounce you dead, as you showed no signs of waking. Levi begged that they allow him one more night with you. They obliged, so that evening, Levi skipped dinner in order to spend as much time with you as he could.

“Y/N. My dear Y/N. I don’t regret loving you even if I were to lose you like this. I won’t plead with you to wake up for me; that would be selfish and you don’t deserve to suffer any more in a world with Titans. I only wish that I dated you much sooner so that our happiness would have lasted much longer,”

Up until now, Levi was managing to keep his voice steady and tears from falling, but realising that he would have to say goodbye to you for real and get rid of any remaining hope he had left, crushed him. The tears were no longer held back and he allowed them to fall down. Levi clasped your still warm hand between both of his hands and sobbed into your intertwined hands.

“Who died?” A raspy voice asked from somewhere in the room.

He was slightly irked by the fact that his final moments alone with you were interrupted. Levi looked up after hastily wiping his eyes with one of his hands while the other still held yours. To his confusion there was no one else in the room. He shook his head, figuring that he probably imagined it and looked back at your face.

Your face still held the same expression as when you were sleeping. The only difference being that your eyes were open!

“Y/N?”

“That is me,”

“Y/N,”

“Yes?”

“Y/N,”

“Please stop saying my name,”

What Levi previously found impossible was finally possible again - he chuckled. He chuckled at your confusion, just overwhelmed with relief that you finally woke up.

“You. You were supposedly dead,”

“Well. I’m clearly not. Whoever pronounced me dead; I’d like a word with them,”

“You were unconscious for ten days, and no one was sure if you’d wake up. And your pulse was quite weak, which is why you ‘died’,”

“Whatever. I’m awake now aren’t I? So stop your tears, you’re wasting energy, I can tell by those bags you haven’t been sleeping,”

“Easy for you to say, you weren’t in my position of not knowing if you would survive or not,”

“True. But I’m not dead. My beating heart and conscious mind are evidence that I survived the colossal titan,”

“Don’t ever do that again. That’s an order,”

“You’re not my commander. That’s Erwin. And besides, I’ve learnt my lesson, I’m staying away from titan shifters, that is, assuming that the colossal titan’s transformation is what has led me here with these burns,”

“Your assumptions are correct. Your injuries came from the colossal titan, and I haven’t been sleeping because I’ve been by your side,”

“That’s sweet of you, but do take care of yourself will you?”

“No guarantees. Especially if you’re in this situation again,”

“I technically can’t be in this situation again. Captain’s orders. As well as my boyfriend’s,”

“It would be beneficial for your boyfriend’s sake if you tried to stay alive,”

“I’m not planning on ever going near the colossal titan again don’t you worry,”

“But I do worry, because.” Levi took an inhale. “Because I love you,”

“And that’s why I love you too. You always care about me and I care about you, so until I’m fully recovered I’m not even going to see a titan,”

“Your boyfriend thanks you,”

“Your girlfriend is weirded out by the third person speech,”

You laughed out loud at your last sentence, which in turn brought a fond smile to Levi’s face. In spite of your promise, your happy ending with Levi was still uncertain, but you were alive and safe with him. For now that was enough.

[rayofsunas]

s/o trying on the boys clothes.

A/n: I hope everyone’s day is going alright, as good as these days can be :( this was requested by an anon. thank you so much for your cute idea anon! also can I just say, I love scaramouche’s hat so much? it’s so pretty!?!?! sorry childe’s is so short, I don’t have much exposure to him ngl. these could be read as g/n, but I did have a female reader in mind, it’s more noticeable in xiao’s.

Summary: s/o trying on the boys clothes.

Parings: Scaramouche/Reader, Childe/Reader, Xiao/Reader

Warnings: fluff, swearing

Word count: 1.2k

Scaramouche

You knew the minute you put his hat on he’d be angered to see you wearing it. But how could you not, when it was just sitting on the back of the wooden chair, begging to be worn.

Your lover had abandoned it for once, but you assumed he hadn’t gone far if he’d left it behind. It was like a signature of his, he never left without it.

If he wasn’t here, he wouldn’t notice you wearing it, so it wouldn’t hurt anybody if you tried it on for just a few minutes. The curiosity was getting the better of you, and before you knew it, you were padding across the room to pick up the hat.

It slipped easily on your head, but you quickly noticed how heavy it was, the weight of the two ornamental accessories weighing it down significantly.

“Jeez, Scara... how do you wear this?” You muttered to yourself, approaching a mirror in your bedroom. You stared at your reflection for quite a while, appreciating and admiring the small intricate designs and details on the top of the hat. It was truly beautiful.

A nervousness bubbled in your stomach when you saw your lover come into view in the mirror, his eyes pointed in a heavy glare.

“What do you think you’re doing,” It wasn’t a question, more like a statement. One that could have held malice behind it if you were someone else.

Despite being nervous, you gulped and confidently announced, “Hello Scara.”

“Take that off.” You weren’t shocked by his demand, not at all.

“But it’s so pretty,” you whined. Scaramouche’s eyes rolled as he strolled forward, standing behind you with a finger on his chin. He was so close you could practically feel the best emitting off of his body; he was... irked.

“It’s design isn’t pretty.” He stated harshly.

“Hmm, I suppose you’re right because it’s not on your head! Here.” You whipped the hat off at the speed of light and were quick to plop it on top of navy hair.

The ornaments continued to jingle even when the hat was secure on his head and you were left staring at an unreadable face.

“Better...” you whispered shyly. “You look like a King now.”

He stayed silent for a long time, it makes you feel uncomfortable and awkward under his gaze.

“Considering you like it so much. Maybe we should have one made for you...” he said thoughtfully, easing away all of your nervousness with just one unusual thoughtful comment. Your face heated up, burning like Jueyun Chili’s, you were excited.

“Really?! You would do that for me! Aw you’re so sweet Scara-”

“Only because I don’t want mine stolen all of the time.”

You frowned, but you would take the previous statement as a compliment. He wanted to match with you, that’s what you decided to conclude.

“Two-faced bastard... just let me have this moment, okay?!”

A rare smile formed on his pale face. “Aw, is someone upset?” You glared.

“Don’t whine like a baby; you’ll get yours in due time.”

You eventually did get your custom hat, designed to accommodate you perfectly. You wore it out of your house proudly, despite passing by travelers commenting on how odd it looked on you due to you looking “normal”. It didn’t bother you, you’d continue to wear it and strut it like a peacock with beautiful feathers. Let’s just say if Scaramouche hears anybody saying that to you, death. 🔪🙂

Childe

Childe LOVES that he caught you wearing his grey jacket, he could not thank the Archons enough, that he got to see such an image this morning. It was a great start to his day. 

“Oh, you’re wearing my jacket, how cute of you, girlie.” He continued to say as you walked through the streets of Liyue. Ever since you had stepped out of your house this morning, and Childe had spotted you wearing his jacket he hadn’t been able to let go of the flirtatious and prideful comments. 

“I didn’t have anything else.” You admitted, kicking rocks at your feet.

His tongue clicked, mockingly. “If you wanted to wear my clothes sweetheart, all you had to was ask!” A long arm gracefully slipped around your shoulders, pulling you closer to his side. You huffed. 

“It’s not like that, I didn’t have time to wash any suitable clothes this morning-”

He only hummed with the shake of his head. “It’s okay, we’ll keep this secret between us.”

“It’s not, ugh whatever...”

You truthfully hadn’t had any suitable clothes left to run to Liyue Harbor in and hadn’t had time to wash them at the river near your home. Hence the reason you were wearing his jacket. You should’ve known he would not be able to drop it as soon as you stepped into his line of vision. 

Although the teasing was annoying, especially so early in the morning after already starting your day stressing about what to wear, you did like the warmth the grey jacket gave you, and you probably would consider wearing it again. 

Xiao

“Please, Xiao, please.” You whined, begging at your knees in front of your husband, hands cupped together in a pray-like form. 

The pale man tried to get you to stand, but you would not, “I do not see why you want to wear my clothes.” He exclaimed, standing tall above you.

“Because, they’re pretty, are they not?” 

He stayed silent, clearly thinking. “I’ve never associated them with the word pretty.” 

You hummed, eyes glistening with false tears, he concluded. You sure did know how to get your way. Without much thought as to what he was saying, the man suddenly mumbled, “Fine, if you must.” 

You cheered excitedly and loudly as if you had won a battle. Xiao watched with curiosity, as you abruptly stood, leaned in to kiss his cheek, and then ran off towards his wardrobe in the corner of the room. 

You whipped the wardrobe open as if you were starving and began stifling through his clothes. Most articles were similar to his everyday attire, you could see signature teals, purples, and golds; immediately you gravitated towards one of his sleeveless shirts, although this one was a faded gold, with a light purple collar and intricate white detailing closer to the bottom.

Despite your husband still in the room, completely tinted pink from your previous cheek kiss, you threw your top off and began slipping his shirt on. It fit weirdly since you had breasts, kind of snug, you thought. You had to adjust it a few times, but you loved it. It was quite comfortable, almost like a tank top.

“What do you think?” You asked, turning around to face the Adepti. 

He stared. Eventually, he spoke up after seeing your awaiting gaze. “You look beautiful, darling.”

You felt your face heating up, glad he liked how it looked on you, despite being extremely tight up top. 

“Can I wear this more often?”

“I’m not sure-”

“Please.” You whined once again. 

He just could not say no to that look on your face. If he let you get your way more often though, you just might end up with his closet as your own...

1.16.21, rayofsunas

[hookedtheghoul]

My theory is that Hookhausen was never meant to be anything else than a short-lived meme. Then it blew up and the entire management went “oh fuck, well, guess we’ll have to come up with something now”. Correct me if I’m wrong but aren’t storylines written well in advance? If they thought they could get away with just a small bit of two weirdos tagging against a common enemy, they wouldn’t have had anything written down after the rivalry was over. That’s why we got “only” little snippets of them in between matches and after shows. That was all to appease the fans and to promise there will be something in the future. This is also why Danhausen has said at least twice now that Hookhausen will be a thing later on. He wouldn’t lie about that and put himself in a difficult position where the management would berate him for getting our hopes up and then the entire fanbase would attack him when it came out that he lied. Hookhausen will. Be. A. Thing.

So, they had to look at their other storylines and figure out a way to build more of this (and they will, no company would pass an opportunity to milk a cash cow like Hookhausen, even if they themselves didn’t like it). I guess the - what do we call it, Jungle Hook? - thing was the only thing they could come up with this fast. Especially when the company was nearly blown up, all thanks to Certain Wrestlers And Other People Who Shall Not Be Named. Hookhausen was not their priority at that point.

Anyway. It’s not smooth. It’s not necessarily good (unless they’re somehow playing 4D chess which is highly unlikely). It was probably the first remotely good idea they could come up with. Would we have done better? Absolutely. But we’re not getting paid to do this (@ TK: you can change this any day) so we’re stuck with their ideas.

I personally am not mad about this. I’m willing to give them the benefit of the doubt. Like I said, it’s not smooth or that great writing-wise, but I’ve read worse. Hell, I’ve written worse. The only thing that really irks me is the slower-than-glacial pace they’re going with, but what can you do.

So two days before D-day, aka the Dynamite episode we don't like to talk about, Taz posted this on Twitter:

Obviously I didn't connect anything until this whole Jungle Hook thing dropped and Taz started spending his days arguing with dudebros about how well the storyline works (sidenote, but if your dad has to engage dudebros on social media and argue about why your new storyline makes tons of sense, um, it totally doesn't), so I find the timing coincidental at worst and highly suspect at best. But why post that before anyone sees the episode who wasn't there for filming, since the backlash hadn't started yet?

This begs the question: how did they know people weren't going to like it?

All they had was an arena audience. They didn't have everybody else reacting yet. So...were they bracing for it not to go over well? Or was Taz just assuming the worst and going into parent mode? (Which, again, sigh) Or was this somehow unconnected, which is possible but not really probable, you know?

(I've mentioned before, but Danhausen is hyper connected to his fan base. And the internet. Like he's probably reading this right now -- Hi, D! -- so there's no way he's unaware of how popular Hookhausen was. Even if no one else is paying attention, he would be. I would be... surprised if the company wasn't paying equal attention. So a negative reaction probably should have been expected, if their teams are earning their keep in market research.)

I'm interested in takes on this. I could be totally wrong! It wouldn't be the first time, nor the last. But it strikes me now, in hindsight, as weird.

[antiloreolympus]

5 Older Anti LO Asks

1. Does Persephone have motives or goals though? I'm not joking, I'm not sure exactly what she even wants or what she's even doing, the plot seems to dictate what's going on for her and she just does nothing unless the plot or other characters make something happen for her. I've never seen a lead so passive in their supposed story.

2. A lot that irks me about Persephone and Hades is that Persephone has the opportunity to get pissed at Hades to have some growth dialogue between them but they don’t.

“You stole a photographers’ eye ball??!!” Well since we still have it we’ll just put it back no problem. It was the closest thing to an argument but was fixed just like that. Persephone doesn’t even get to really define herself as her own person who has emotions because hades and her do it together and she’s just doo attracted to him.

Hades veto Demeter from queen of the mortal realm because he’d lose volcanoes. We’re suppose to buy the idea that Persephone does find her mother overbearing but still supports her, so when she finds out her not boyfriend veto her mother from having any power against Zeus, no reaction no emotion just in love with him never mentioned again. What does he need volcanoes for? It’s mentioned Demeter and hades don’t get along but doesn’t go into it, well there’s a reason, and Persephone does not care.

She’s also mad at her mom for getting hades drunk to block a creepy crush on her daughter, but hades was still asking for alcohol. It’s not like he wasn’t trying to drink, it’s on him. 

3. There's a webtoon called 'When The Day Comes' that only has 52 chapters (with 1 side chapter) that literally only spans the course of like 2/3 days but it's written so well and shows so much depth to the characters that I didn't care it had only been 2/3 days, which makes LO that much more awful in its writing.

Like I don't think I'd have been as annoyed about how 1 day in LO time is like 20+ chapters if RS had put any effort in developing her characters and given them depth, y'know?

In 'When The Day Comes' we get flashbacks and thoughts to all the characters, and the way the story weaves through present and past is, in my opinion, seamless and wonderfully done and gives so much emotion weight to what is presently happening, and if RS had only taken the time and care to do that too we wouldn't have such an awful plot with equally awful and bland characters.

4. I hate how LO makes the HxP ship as much as the next person, but Hades wasn't exactly the bad guy, and we probably shouldn't forget that. I've chatted with some history majors before, and they still agree that in myths they generally had a pretty nice marriage in comparison to others. I've heard once that the myth was more between Zeus and Demeter than anything else, a lesson that when you give your bro permission to marry a girl, you should probably consult the girl and her mom

5. "Persephone’s “Elysium” [is still] segregated to “good” shades, meaning everyone else are STILL slaves, but the occasional “good” ones get to enjoy the afterlife" okay I didn't even think about that but wowowow that is so horrible. rachel we know you're white and so is your team but do none of you know even a remote bit of history to know this looks really bad?? like??

[rwrights]

WE'LL BE OKAY - NAT.

summary : nat and you never got along. reasons still unknown, but it was affecting the whole team. steve assigns you both to a mission, with natasha acting harshly. she said something to you before heading off. she got in your head and the aftermath wasn't so pretty.

contents : angst (??) / fluff

warnings : mentions of blood, guns, bullying, cursing and just occasional marvel fight scenes.

NOT PROOFREAD. a/n : my first fic aaaahhh !! i was inspired by a lot of similar fics like this, but mostly by this WANDA FIC WRITTEN BY @/maximons - i suggest you give it a read BCS ITS SO GOOD ARRGH <3

you don’t know how the feud started between you and natasha. you couldn’t tell if it was because of your age or because you were new.

you had quite an age gap with the former assassin, being a striking 24 years old, but according to the russian - you might as well have been 12 years of age.

unlike most of the avengers, you had a decent childhood. it wasn’t filled with trauma, and death, and basically what some of them unfortunately went through. you grew up in the suburbs with your mum and two older siblings. you got all the toys you wanted and everyone loved you! because of that, you were always polite and cheery - it’s what made people like you. you were funny and usually managed to put a smile on people faces ; usually.

natasha found your positivity irking and unnatural. how could someone be so, happy? she felt as if you were shitting rainbows down her throat, and god, did she hate it. how could someone like you even have the guts to be an avenger?

she enjoyed picking fights with you out of nowhere, and as fun as it was at first - the hostility only progressed and became a disruption to the whole team, including you. you tried your best to really become friends with natasha - or at least be civil with her. but the more effort you made, the worse she treated you. all you wanted to do was make it a little easier for the team, you all have enough crap to put up with and the quarreling between the both of you was definitely not needed.

─── donk.

“nat! y/n! conference room one, now!” steve’s loud voice called out through the speakers placed throughout the compound.

you set your book aside before running down to the conference room as you were told. you walked passed natasha, already giving you a sharp glare from afar. she adjusted her speed and basically ran to where away from you. you couldn’t help but roll your eyes at her as you trailed behind.

you entered the room, greeting everyone politely before sitting down next to wanda, who saved a space for you.

“alright, now that we’re all here..” cap began, walking around the table where you were all sat. “we’ve got a mission for two of you,”

“did you call us here to compete for it? because i am so getting this mission.” natasha stated, pointing at everyone as if she was threatening them. “uh, no.. not exactly. we’ve already assigned the mission to two of you..”

“who?” she asked, wanting to leave the compound immediately and get some action (not the peepee way).

“you and y/n,”

hearing your name, you just froze. you couldn’t help but stare at steve as if he was out of his mind.

“what?!” natasha squeaked. “i’m sorry, but there is no way i’m going with her. it’s probably best if i go on my own!”

“that’s just mean..” you replied quietly, in your seat. you weren’t in the mood to argue, so you tried to contribute as little as possible into this conversation. “cap, if natasha doesn’t want to do the mission with me, i’m totally fine with sitting this one out.”

“oh, don’t suck up and use your y/n reverse psychology on this. it’s not gonna work,” she spat, obviously mad about the whole situation. “nat, i’m being serious. i know how much you’ve been dying to go out, so please. just take it.”

“no, y/n, you’re going with nat. we’ve decided this already.” steve stepped in, trying his best to set his foot down. “steve, i think you know this isn’t going to happen.” natasha glared.

“you either go together or y/n takes someone else.”

“steve! i swear i’m fine!” you argued, seeing how natasha’s ears were practically steaming from anger. “i-”

“no, you know what? fine. enjoy your mission, y/l/n.” she growled as she stormed out of the room. you couldn’t do anything but watch as she slammed the door shut. as much as you wanted to chase after her, you and everyone else in the room knew you’d probably make the situation a thousand times worse for natasha. you sighed and slammed your head on the table in exhaustion.

“we’re sorry, y/n. we thought her need for a mission would make her say yes even with the partnership.” bucky said from the other side of the room. your head shot up almost as quickly as you blinked. “what do you mean?”

“we thought sending you two on a mission together could… make the arguing stop - even by a little.” steve explained, sighing. you laughed at them, did they really think that would work? did they know the obstacles you went through to try to get on her good side? your first few weeks were HELL because of it.

“it’s alright.. clint? what do ya say?”

“always up for a mission, y/l/n.” he smiled, giving you a fistbump.

─── donk.

clint knocked on natasha’s door after the meeting. “nat? it’s me,” he called, nat opening the door a few seconds after.

“can you believe them? they know how much i dislike her and they’d send me on a mission with her? Bozhe mo! (oh my god!)”

“nat, y/n is awesome. it’s been months, it’s getting tiring.”

“oh, please. it took forever to get any of you guys to trust me. doesn’t mean it has to be the same with her.”

“nat, she’s a kid!”

“ugh, don’t say it like that. it makes my thoughts uneasy..” nat replied, mock-gagging. clint glared at her as he playfully shoved her. “you’re so stupid.”

“and oh, i’m going on the mission with her.”

“wait what?! but you’re my best friend, why would you take it!” she exclaimed. “i never say no to a mission, nat. you and i both know that. i thought you did, too.”

“i would’ve taken it, but.. no! i’m not losing this fight.” she huffed as she fell on the bed. “turn the tv on, i need to distract myself.”

he did as he was told and decided to stay and watch with her until dinner.

─── donk.

it was the day of your mission and you were making your way to the hangar. to your surprise, you saw natasha waiting there. you smiled at her only to receive another sharp glare. yeah, what a surprise. you looked away and decided to wait for clint.

not long after he arrived and said his goodbyes to natasha, just as you were going to aboard the ship, she grabbed your wrist and whispered in your ear.

“you’re gonna trip and get yourself shot, y/l/n.”

“what the hell? i’ve barely left and you’re already telling me i’m gonna fuck up?” you retorted, angrily. you weren’t in the right state to panic or stress. especially not before you were leaving. “have fun, y/n.” she smiled, dripping in faux kindness.

you followed clint onto the ship and couldn’t help but shake in fear. great, now you were worried. you didn’t want to fuck up. you weren’t planning to.

“you’ll be okay, y/l/n. i’ve got your back.” clint reassured, seeing the panic clouding on your face.

“thank you..” you mumbled, but natasha’s words never left your head.

─── donk.

“something seems off, clint.” you whispered, looking around and keeping your guard up. “i agree, y/l/n. it’s too quiet.. too easy.” he replied.

just as you were going to reply, someone charged at you from behind, getting a hold of your throat. by instinct, you kicked his shin and flipped him around. “clint!” you called out as you knocked your attacker out.

suddenly, groups of people were coming towards you - fully armed. “clint!” you screamed, pulling your gun out and shooting as many of them as you could. “shit!”

“y/n, it’s a trap!” clint finally replied, making you roll your eyes as you threw your fist at a guy’s temple. “yes, clint, i’m aware!”

“keep your guard up, y/l/n. you can do this!”

“there’s-” kick. “too many-” elbow. “of them!” shoot.

“try to hold out for as long as possible! i’m on my way,”

you looked up to see more men charging at you. “ah fuck,”

you grabbed one of the guns from the guys you managed to knock out and aimed. “clint, i can shoot right?” you asked for permission, not knowing if you were supposed to kill them or just simply knock them out.

“yes, y/n. you can shoot.”

“thank you!”

you silently thanked god for the gun you chose and started shooting at the guards. you quickly threw it away as they ran out of bullets and grabbed two pistols and continued to run and shoot away.

as you focused on getting a certain guard, one of them slid under you, quite literally slipping you off your feet - probably making you twist your ankle, giving one of them an opportunity to get a clean shot of your thigh.

the bullet went through your thigh, making you scream in pain. “fuck!” you shot back at him immediately and slid up onto the wall.

well great, another thing natasha was right about.

“y/n?!” clint called, hearing you scream. the worry in his voice was evident, it managed to make you smile for a second until you dodged another bullet.

“i’m okay!”

no, you weren’t. you could barely stand with your fucked up ankle and the hole in your thigh, but you continued to shoot and fight.

“just.. hurry up, please!”

you used your bad leg to kick a guy down and use him as a ledge. you cursed as you ran out of bullets. there were guns scattered across the floor, thanks to you. you just grabbed the nearest ones and looked back up.

as quickly as you did, a shot went through your shoulder and your abdomen. “gah fuck!” you collapsed on the floor as you tried to control the bleeding. you got up for a second to shoot back at the closest people and went back down. “clint, hurry up!” the pain was too much, the bleeding wouldn’t stop and your ankle looked like a fucking bean. you started to get nauseous, but tried your best to stay up.

“i’m here!” he yelled as he aimed at a few people in front of him. he ran towards you, finally seeing your state. “oh my god!” he kneeled down, putting pressure on your wounds to help with the bleeding, but the blood just kept seeping through “you just said you were okay, idiot!”

“i know, i didn’t want to worry you..” you mumbled. “no, no! y/n, you have to stay awake. come on!” he picked you up and started running away to go back to the ship. “you’re okay, y/n. tell me you’re okay right now.”

“i’m okay.. i’m okay, clint.”

“yeah, yeah, you are.”

you tried making it to the ship, but you were already so tired. “i’m gonna nap, clint..” you said before passing out.

─── donk.

clint alerted steve about you right when you passed out. they were rushing you out to the med bay to perform surgery on your injuries.

“she told me she was okay, steve. i thought she was okay!” clint screamed, he blamed himself for what happened to you. only if he arrived a few seconds before. you wouldn’t have been in the situation you’re in now.

“no, no. this isn’t your fault. neither is it hers, it happens, okay? we put ourselves at risk every time we step out of here. y/n was brave, alright?

wanda rushed down to the medbay, reaching for the door before pulling her back. “wanda, we have to let dr cho do her job right now. she’ll be okay.. y/n will be okay.”

she cried into steve’s shoulder - her best friend was being operated on. you were being operated on! the thought of you getting hurt never crossed her mind because she knew you were strong.

the team soon heard about the incident and let their worries out, obviously caring about you. natasha was confused about the whole hassle.

“vision!” she called out. he turned around and walked towards natasha. “how may i help you?”

“what’s the hassle about? everyone keeps whispering,”

“mr barton and ms y/l/n have returned from their mission, but ms y/l/n has suffered some major injuries and has been in surgery for about an hour now-”

hearing that, she sped to the medbay, thanking vision quickly. she saw wanda, steve and clint waiting around. “no, no, where is she?!” she yelled, making the three of them look at her in shock. “she’s still in-”

she tried running into the room like wanda did, getting pulled back by steve. “natasha, we have to let dr. cho do her job.”

“i need to see her!” she exclaimed, not being able to breathe. “what happened to her? what major injuries?!” she demanded.

“broken ankle, shot through her thigh, shoulder and abdomen..” clint recited, looking down at his feet. “where were you!? how could you let this happen?!” she roared, genuinely shocking them.

why did she suddenly care about you? well, yes, you suffered major injuries, but why was she getting mad?

“natasha! enough!” steve scolded. “this isn’t clint’s fault, and you know it.” he said, sternly. she didn’t reply as she panted. wanda held her hand as support, needing it for herself as well.

─── donk.

an hour later, dr. cho finally walked out of the room. everyone stood up in eagerness.

“is she okay?” steve asked, immediately.

“y/n suffered major blood loss, but we are lucky none of the three bullets hit any major arteries. she has also quite definitely broken her ankle, so i’m putting her on bedrest for at least 6 weeks until you get her up and going again.”

“main point, yes. y/n is okay.”

a smile broke out in all of their faces. “thank you, doc!”

“you may see her now, but she hasn’t woken up yet. don’t be too loud.”

they all walked into your room and stood beside your bed. “she looks so peaceful,”

“she definitely looks better right now than earlier,” clint joked, earning a soft laugh from the three of them. they stood by you for a while until natasha spoke up.

“um.. could- could i be the one who stays with her until she wakes up?”

they looked at the red head in surprise, “are you sure, nat?” steve asked.

“yeah.. i just want to be here.”

“alright,” they smiled softly at her before leaving.

she held your hand and stayed with you, waiting for you to wake up. it took for a while so she managed to fall asleep, holding your hand.

you slowly started coming back, groaning from the late pain you experienced. natasha jumped in shock and saw that you were awake.

“you’re awake!” she whispered, making you turn to her. “natasha? what’s happening?”

“you passed out during your mission. i know i told you you’d slip and get shot.. but i didn’t actually mean slip and get shot, idiot!” she scolded, flicking your forehead. “gah! it was an accident, i was doing fine,”

“no, you have three holes in your body. and not the good ones,”

“nat??” you replied, shocked. “did you just joke around with me?”

“no..”

“you’re holding my hand.. what did they bribe you with?” you asked, quickly getting suspicious. you tried pulling your hand away, but she only held onto you tighter. “nothing! i.. i volunteered. ask steve and wanda! and clint!” she replied, defending herself quickly.

“well, if you volunteered.. what do you want from me? i’m not gonna be leaving the compound for at least 2 months, so you can have all my missions-”

“no, y/n. truthfully, i just really want to apologize.”

“huh”

“i know i’ve made your first few weeks really hard and even after being here for months, i still managed to.. you know.. make it hard for you. in full honesty, i genuinely don’t know why i’ve been so horrible to you. i had a hard time opening up to people - and.. you were just so welcoming and i got scared. not an excuse for my actions, by the way! i was horrible and i’m so sorry.”

“thank you for your apology, i forgive you, nat.” you smiled, squeezing her hand. “i also.. have feelings for you.” natasha added, avoiding eye-contact with you. “you whAT?!”

“i-”

“i like you too! but are- are you serious?”

“yes, y/n… i like you. guess that’s why i was so defensive about.. literally everything.”

“nat.. thank you. for opening up to me. it genuinely means so much - especially after all this fucking time, you asshole.”

“are we okay now?” she asked, hopeful.

“yes, nat. we’re okay.”

[lalaurelia]

Gotham Rewatch 1x02

It’s a slower episode, but still setting the mood and some important things.

The scene with Bruce. Oof. It’s a logical continuation of the one in the previous ep, with him on the ledge. Testing more of his limits. Thinking that it gives him some form of control, over his present state and what happened. I so don’t envy Alfred there.

Then we get a glimpse of Selina with her peers, and I wonder if it hasn’t been her last? I don’t remember atm. We didn’t really see much of her life in the streets, it seems. Though she’s aloof and mistrustful, she’s still very much a little kid.

Then a glimpse into Jim’s army past at the crime scene. It’s so frustrating that it got glossed over, birthing a couple of rather infuriating takes, but it was probably never meant to be an important part of his character, just some traits - like discipline and respect for rules paired up with disrespect for authority? because really, look at Jim and tell me he didn’t end up fighting with his CO more often than not. He’s also more high-strung from here on out. It’s pretty important though that Jim tells Mackie that he’s not gonna get hit when Harvey threatens to do just that, and objects when Harvey says that it’ll be fine - because none of that is fine, it’s a kid and a detainee, they have rights and Jim would protect those rights. Another thing that sets him apart from his colleagues.

The scene where Oswald’s getting teased by the guys who pick him up on the road always makes me uneasy. Perhaps, if they’d treated him nicer, they’d get to live. Perhaps not. Perhaps he meant to steal from them and take a hostage anyway, and just waited for the right opportunity. We’ll never know. I like the shift his voice does from when he’s trying to be nice and polite, to when he’s incensed and lashes out. It’s so cold.

Then the scene at Fish’s club. It’s like. Don Falcone comes off as someone who could almost be nice? and then he goes and pulls shit like making his bodyguards beat up the guy Fish was sleeping with, in her line of view, as he holds her hand and gaze. So cold. So cruel. If Oswald was a regular witness to scenes like these, is there any surprise he’s come to think of it as something natural, something people just did to others?

I do wonder about the photograph on the left. Just how removed are these people from Oswald? Grandparents, grandgrandparents? I wonder if the little kid was meant to be Oswald at this point, but given his backstory later, it seems unlikely. I think the leftmost lady was supposed to be Gertrud, and the kid - perhaps a younger brother?

Also. Renee kinda irks me with her doubts about Oswald’s being snatched by a woman. Like you’re one to talk, girl. Like you have any say in that. Also. You literally live in Gotham, is it hard to imagine that people could have all kinds of preferences? anyway, this makes me like her less XD

I do enjoy the following scene with Barbara. It’s characteristic of Jim’s conflict between following the rules and doing what’s right, and characteristic of Barbara who shares his idea of what’s right and whose heart was in the right place to begin with - and Jim, knowing it would be troublesome for him, but not having it in his heart to actually be angry at her for calling the newspaper.

And they’re just cute, so.

Jim trying to act all innocent at the precinct is awfully cute too. And technically he’s not lying, but still XD And then his talk with Harvey, who says Barbara needs a firm hand, but Jim says he likes her the way she is.

Gotham mayor is a piece of work, unsurprisingly. It’s the second time I see Richard Kind in the role of a corrupt mayor, and it’s funny to me. He does have that vibe, somehow.

Also. When Alfred comes to invite Jim for tea, isn’t that just a little weird? Like. This is the Wayne family. They had to have a big social circle, after all, even if we’re judging by the people who showed up for the funeral. And that neither of them were close enough to drop in on Bruce to see how he fared, and that none of them had kids of a similar age? Just how secluded were you. Anyway, it makes sense for the show, but it’s also very sad that all those presumed social connections have been lost.

The way Selina gives advice to the other kid on the bus makes you think that she’s been to juvie before. Which is also another point of character building that gets glossed over.

This time Jim doesn’t object to the beating, though he’s not happy about it either. But math wins. Kids’ lives win. It’s subtle, but Gotham gradually begins to chip at Jim’s armour of principles.

Also, they’ve totally hinted at Trident in the previous ep, and through the city shots of this one.

Jim is funny when he gets called out on bullshitting by Bruce. But he meant well. I do enjoy their semi-familial dynamic, with Jim being maybe not a parent figure, that being reserved for Alfred, but something of an uncle? or a significantly older and slightly estranged brother. And he explains that some problems aren’t solved with money, at least not directly. 

Then we get at least one other decent cop there, handling Selina’s case. I wonder if we’d see him later? probably not. But unlike the others we’ve seen, he’s been kinder. Which Selina promptly uses for her advantage and gets to meet Jim.

Who loves that little scrapbooking project of Oswald’s? I wonder if that’s how all of his plans were formed. Little insights and scathing remarks here and there, too, because of course it’s personal. I do wonder what he knew of Barbara to put something like that, and from where. Gossips column, most likely?

And then he’s not taken seriously again, and as much as I want to think he maybe didn’t torture that kidnapped guy... he probably took his anger out on him. They were planning Oswald to be a lot more cruel, didn’t they...

I like the subtle smiles Jim gets around Selina. They’re very alike in some things, and I think he liked the gutsy kid. And she’d seen him actually care while spying on him.

All in all, it’s a setup episode. So I don’t have more to say about it.

[qsphyxias]

𝖗𝖊𝖈𝖐𝖑𝖊𝖘𝖘

if you fetishize mlm/nblm relationships, get the fuck out of here!

synopsis ; you took a reckless bullet for your ever so beloved detective/partner, and shuichi isn't too happy about it. understatement ; he was fucking devastated

warnings ; hospitals, gun violence, getting shot, inaccurate depictions of police and police negotiations, cussing, major angst, male! reader uses he/him pronouns

note ; the first one-shot of this blog, everybody dance ( the imagine isn’t based on the song, but i just thought it had the same vibe ig )

words ; 4k

⊱ ────── {⋅.𝐢𝐝𝐟𝐜 - 𝐛𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐛𝐞𝐚𝐫.⋅} ────── ⊰

ring, ring.

...

ring, ring.

what's that noise?

ring, ring.

why won't it stop?

ring, rin-

"hello?" gratuity washed over your body, the feeling causing you to relax as the obnoxious noise had been replaced by the gentle tone of the one you love. suddenly you didn't feel as bitter as you did before; when you had first awoken from your slumber. "ah... yes, this is... detective shuichi saihara."

your head shifted towards the sound of shuichi's voice, eyes flickering to him and back to the small dot on the ceiling you had first caught sight of.

shuichi darted his eyes over to your turned back, hands cupping the phone as he tried to muffle the authoritative tone your shared boss had been emitting. "... but he's still recovering. no, i don't think that that's-" the anxious detective's voice grew a little louder out of panic, causing him to immediately lower it back down to a whisper as his mind reminded him that you were still sleeping — or so he thought. "just... at least give him one more day. please. i'll take all his work for that day."

you blinked, brain whirling as you tried to process the information that seemed to be dripping from shuichi's lips. who's he talking about? you groaned quietly, feeling as if an anvil and a hammer had been clanging obnoxiously at your head.

shuichi whipped his head towards you, sad eyes widening as he had caught your groan, however soft it was. "s/o?" nearly dropping the phone, he tightened his grip and spoke into the receiver again, quickly wanting to end the call so he could go check on you. "oh- um, th- thank you so much, yes- okay, thank you again." without hearing his boss's reply, he abruptly ended the call and kept in mind he would have to hear the scolding later — however, it wasn't like he really cared at all in that moment.

"sh-?" you paused, shuffling to sit up from your waxy, cotton hospital bedsheets as you finally decided to announce your consciousness. fuck, how did the rest of his name go? come on brain! he just said it!

shuichi had been repeating and reversing what he had wanted to say to you the moment he saw you shuffle up and groan, as well as what you needed to hear. his head was sure to detonate, each second that passed by brought him closer to his limit.

despite shuichi's selfish desire to hear your lips say his name again, he held his greedy urges back ; he needed to talk to you first. "no, you ...you don't have to talk. actually i... need to talk to you first." that's right, shuichi. stay calm, don't scare him, he's still recovering.

you furrowed your brows at him, feeling yourself slightly perspire at his serious tone ; he was usually a pretty calm, serious guy, so you weren't sure why you had been so nervous. this was quite common, however, talks like this happened a lot at his demand ; he believed communication was key — and since then you were always at his mercy with his sweet and honest sentiments.

however cringe-worthy they may have seemed, he never failed to make you flush from his honesty ; though the embarrassment he caused you had been nothing but unintentional, or at least...you believed it to be.

laughing nervously, you opened your mouth to say a stupid joke to lighten up the mood, but the throbbing feeling of your shoulder being detached, reattached, pulled, strained, and yanked stopped you from doing...well, practically anything. wincing, you gripped your wound instinctively.

"s/o! i- i said not to talk...!" the sudden, yet the revolting sound of his chair scraping against the floor hit your ears, but shuichi's hands cradling your face distracted you from the gross sound. "s- shuichi?" his touch acted as a brain restarted, as your pupils suddenly dilated ; memories of yesterday coming back to you and hitting you like that bullet you took for him.

that bullet you took for him...

"i- i did it out of love! just- just let me go! i can't go to jail! i just fucking can't!" with blurred and fuzzed vision, there stood the perp, a small pistol held improperly in his quivering hands as he spewed out excuses and nonsense.

"listen, it's going to be okay...! just put down the gun, and i promise, we'll try and work this out ; i'll talk to the judge about your prison time, just...trust me, okay?" right...you remember now. you could remember so vividly how beautiful he looked, even as he was practically sweating out of his fancy turtleneck, he still somehow was able to keep a calm attitude.

he was...he was such a nice guy. well, that was an understatement.

despite his amazingly calm and reserved speech, the perp remained unconvinced, yet also unsure of what he was supposed to do. that much was obvious when he kept darting his eyes all over the room indecisively picking one spot to focus on.

as you held your gun firmly and pointed in your hands, you flickered your eyes back onto the perp, despite wanting to stare at the detective for hours ; you had a job to do.

you sidestepped towards the detective that had kept his golden eyes glued onto the perp carefully, leaning your head into his side as you whispered something into his ear, "you know you can't actually do that, right?" you could see his adam's apple bob in response.

"i'll... i'll figure something out." shuichi adjusted his grip on the gun he held, eyebrows furrowed in such a breathtaking way. you could feel your knees buckle.

"what are you guys- what are you guys talking about, huh? talking about- how-how i'm such a pathetic piece of shit!? huh?!" you threw your head back to the shaking, wary man, gun tightening in your grip. "we weren't. just take his offer, it's the best thing you can do." your tone had been firmer than shuichi's, not as kind, but hey ; that was your whole dynamic.

"we really weren't." shuichi agreed, sincerity was written all over his face. a small part of you felt envious of his stare.

"stop-stop lying to me!" the perp's frantic switching of his gunpoint, seemed to halt to a stop as he directed it at shuichi ; causing an unwanted panic to rise up in the both of you, but mostly you.

"hey, you seem pretty nervous there. say, when was the last time you had any contact with drugs or alcohol?" you questioned in a condescending tone, a smug smile adorning your face and irking the already unstable man. looking back at it now, you should've kept your mouth shut. even so, shuichi's life was in danger, and if you had to risk your life for his ; well, you'd take any chance to do that.

the perp seemed to take the bait and aimed it back at your chest, lucky or unlucky for you two. "shut up!" an unreasonable relief washed over you as shuichi had been put out of danger.

shuichi looked over at you, communicating with his eyes as if he was pleading for you to stop and let him handle it instead. however, there seemed to be an itty bitty miscommunication. your ego seemed to betray you, as you started spewing out things you probably shouldn't have been saying ; all so you could impress the very nervous and quite frankly, unhappy detective.

"cocaine? heroin-?"

shuichi glared at you, mistakenly taking his eyes off the perp for once. "s/o, what are you doing?! i have this under control...!" he suddenly barked at you, breaking his composure as he had gotten a tidbit angered that you had been interfering with the negotiation.

"shut up! shut up, shut up, just shut the f-fuck up!" a gunshot rang out.

"watch out!" without thinking, you had shoved the frozen detective away from you, even if the gun had already been pointed at you ; you had no business risking his life.

jesus, you were probably the most idiotic man known to humankind.

next thing you know, you've been knocked onto the floor, head throbbing and wheezing from blood loss as shuichi has to determine whether he should chase after the perp or stay with you.

the decision had been more than easy ; he took barely one second to decide that your life was more important. dialing back-up in one hand, he crouched down to assist you with the other. taking in one shaky but deep inhale, shuichi nervously fiddled with his radio, shaky eyes glued to you. "officer down, i repeat officer down."

"the hell are you doing, saihara...!? he's going to get away!"

"i-i can't just leave! what if you- no, i-! just...just here," he handed to you a handkerchief he held in his shaky hands. "press it onto the wound, okay? please?" he wasn't going to take no for an answer, one more beat and he would've been doing it for you.

grunting, "shuichi, i'm happy you're worried about me but you're being hella stupid right now-" you cut yourself off, grunting at feeling the strain of talking.

"w- why did you do that? i had the situation under control...!" he sounded upset, that much was clear.

"he...he aimed the gun at you and i guess i panicked, i don't- i don't know, look- just go, alright? back-up's coming for me, and you know you can't let him get away." you could feel the adrenaline from getting shot wearing off, and with it, the pain getting worse. sweat formed on your brow ; it felt like the more you breathed, the more the searing pain worsened.

you knew deep down you didn't want him to go, that you were scared you could actually die within moments, yet you hated yourself for that feeling. it was extremely selfish. it wasn't fair. you could remember the way he looked at you.

"i'm not going, that's final. we're going to... we're going to wait for back-up together, okay?" it was weird to hear him use his asserting tone when talking to you, it was weird to hear him so confident with you too ; yet you couldn't ignore the strange sense of pride you held.

suddenly out of the blue, a wave of exhaustion hit you, causing your eyelids to flicker shut. you knew you weren't supposed to sleep ; especially not when you were bleeding out from your shoulder, but you told yourself, hey, one 10-minute nap couldn't hurt, right? back-up would come anyway.

before shuichi could even stop you, you're already out like a light, and causing sudden arrhythmia to shuichi's chest. "s/o! w-wake up!" with his words echoing throughout your dream-like state, your smile only seemed to widen ; he may have been screaming at you to not leave him — but his voice still kept that same, soothing tone to it. it was like a lullaby, to a man seconds away from death.

comparing his tone and reaction from the incident to now, it had certainly been different. you wondered what had changed... maybe he was mad? understatement of the year it seemed ; he was probably pissed the fuck off. you did ruin the negotiation after all, and for what?

"you don't seem very sad that i got shot ; i knew you were a pretty stoic guy but i didn't peg you as cold-hearted." you teased, to which shuichi held a neutral face, eyebrows creasing as he stared you dead in the eye. for a second you worried if he could tell you were joking.

"... i cried for days, s/o." his voice broke, and you could feel your heartbreak piece by piece as he frowned at you.

blinking in response, you didn't seem to believe him ; why would he cry over you? your head was probably just fucking with you. promptly ignoring the blood bag hanging beside you wondered if it had been the blood loss. "you- you what?"

it took you a few minutes to process what he had said, and for good reason. days? had you been asleep that long-? wait, he was crying? over you?

sometimes you forget he has emotions from how calm he is ; you swear you've only ever seen three sides of him ; anxious shuichi, serious shuichi, and calm shuichi. along with the occasional happy shuichi when you make him laugh with your shitty jokes, but that's a secret you keep between the two of you. or more like for yourself.

"i was- i mean, of course, i was devastated- you're sp- i mean- look, why did you- what made- that w- s/o, you- ah-" he stammered over his words frustratingly, hand rising to fiddle with his hair out of habit.

you watched him sympathetically. "hey, where'd mister assertive go?" you grinned, tone playful as you essayed soothing his anxiety. "...listen, it's okay, just take your time ; i'd prefer it if you did anyway, you're probably just gonna scold me, right?"

shuichi took strange comfort in your words, golden eyes staring straight at your hospital-gown covered chest as he tried calming himself down. "y-yeah...thanks." something was unsettling about how you seemed to be smiling in a situation where you nearly got yourself killed — even so, it was refreshing to see it.

he missed it. he missed you.

you had been sleeping for two days, so it would make sense that you were refreshed and well-rested enough to be back to your regular self.

whilst you had been peacefully sleeping and recovering in the nasty smelling hospital, shuichi had been in agony. those two whole days had been hell for him. crushing guilt and his anxiety attacked his head 24/7 ; even when he knew you probably weren't going to die in your sleep, 'probably' wasn't very assuring when you were shuichi saihara.

he would fret for hours and cry in the shower about whether it was his fault or not ; despite it being so obviously your fault, he couldn't help but wonder what he could've done differently. he shouldn't have been so weak, he'd tell himself. this was a normal thing that happened as a police officer, getting shot in the line of duty, it was normal. but it... it was completely different when he knew it was you who had been taking the bullet.

his eyes widened as he felt your hand clasp upon his. "don't look so guilty, shuichi. you're breaking my heart." you pouted, apologetic eyes staring at his kicked-puppy-like eyes. "sorry, i just- i know you said you...you said you panicked when the perp aimed the gun at me ; who, um, thankfully got captured by one of our back-up team." he could hear you sigh in relief, which frankly, irked him a little.

you were still worried about that? he, himself was a workaholic but not to the point where he would sigh in relief as there was a large bullet wound inside his shoulder.

"but uh, i don't...i don't think i understand why? i mean, he- he wasn't going to shoot, i had it under control—"

"i know you did, and i trust you but...i just couldn't take any chances, you know? i'm...honestly i don't really regret much." you smiled sheepishly, hands gently fiddling with his cold hand that rested on the very end of your hospital bed.

"i mean, i get to see you worried about me." you chuckled, "it's cute, i have to admit." you forgot all about your wound at this point.

his guilty expression didn't change a bit ; eyebrows only furrowing deeper down as he eyed you questionably. "you think it's...cute? you almost got yourself killed, s/o. you know you can't be that reckless. to get yourself nearly killed just because you didn't want to take the chance of me in danger...s/o, i was terrified. when you fell asleep, i thought my heart was collapsing — you shouldn't have done that for me—" his worries spilled out of his mouth like fluid, the words coming to mind easier, and quicker at the cause of your hands being a good distraction.

"saihara." you snapped him out of it, tugging his arm further towards you. "don't cry, okay? i'm okay. if it makes you feel better, i'll...try not to do that again. please, just..." you swiped your thumb at his face, flushing as he instinctually leaned into your hand.

shuichi sniffed in response, hands coming up to wipe his own face as soon as he realized he was, indeed crying. "...i'm sorry."

"i know i'm too reckless for my own good, but i just didn't want for you to get hurt. you're...you mean so much to me. more than you could ever know." you confessed, eyes averting as you tried to avoid his reaction.

"um, i don't know what i'm saying — maybe it's the painkillers? they put in the right blood type for me, righ-?" you took your hand away from his and to the back of your cold neck.

"i made sure they had the right one — but um, what did you mean by that? just earlier?" shuichi stared up at you, pouting as you only seemed to look away from his detecting stare.

you knew one look in your eyes would show everything you felt for him ; and you weren't sure if he even wanted to see that emotion. so you settled for a temporary solution.

"um, is- is that a bee outside? i like bees, though they are going instinct — haha, the human race is fucked-"

"s/o, why are you avoiding the question?" he dealt with many guilty perps, thus knowing when someone was guilty ; and that right now, had been you.

you grunted underneath his stare, sinking further down into your sheets as you sighed defeatedly. it's not like you could hide from a detective for long. "i- uh, i just meant like," your confidence seemed to deter ; and for a second shuichi almost felt bad. almost.

his job as a detective meant he wouldn't stop until he got answers ; and that applied to his daily life as well, his daily life that included so much of you.

damn him and his adorable crying. "i think i...since the gun thing, and i don't know if this will comfort you in anyway but this has been seriously e-eating at my brain and i finally know- i finally know what this feeling is. i feel kind of dumb for not knowing earlier ; i mean, was my career as a detective nothing?" you gazed at him from underneath the 'comfort' of your uncomfortable paper-thin sheets.

"getting off-track, i just meant that i-i think that i really really like you." your voice had been slightly muffled by the sheets, but shuichi heard you clearly nonetheless. he made sure he did.

"you- me? r- romantically?" he flushed bright red as you nodded in confirmation.

you hoped he was as embarrassed as you were because you felt like you would dissolve into the sheets from the pure humiliation if he wasn't. "youdon'thavetosayanything,ijustthoughti'dletyoukno-"

"n-no, that's not it! i- i like you too! i...haha, to be honest, i thought this would go differently." he chuckled, scratching his cheek awkwardly as he eyes your shoulder wound.

jerking up, you briefly ignored the searing pain in your shoulder as you leaned way too close to him for comfort, a look of pure devastation and worry on your face. "you already knew?"

he couldn't help but think your worried pout was nothing but adorable, unsuccessfully stifling a goofy smile. "no, i..." honestly he kind of did already know, but he never thought it was something possible ; thus clouding his judgment.

"i planned to confess, actually...i was planning to-to talk to you about it during one of our-"

you made an 'o' shape with your mouth, a thoughtful look in your eyes as you nodded understandingly. "-talks, of course."

huffing quietly, he sent you a worried look. "what, are they bad? communication is key, you know-" his informative, but light-hearted scolding had been cut off as you reached to tussle with his hair, erupting a hiccup out of him.

"they're not bad ; you're just...you're a real saint."

"a-ah, i wouldn't say that..." you laughed at his nervous reaction, retracting your hand to his dismay.

"that's what a saint would say." he pouted at your teasing tone, grabbing your arm gently with his hand as he kept in mind your disability.

you cut him off as he opened his mouth, seemingly about to defend himself. "don't worry too much about it ; i actually sometimes like our talks...though i spend most of my time staring at you as you talk, it's still pretty fun." oops.

"s-s/o..." he squeaked, looking at you pleadingly for a reason you hadn't been aware of yet.

"what? i didn't say anything wrong, did i?" blinking at him, you tilted your head.

"n-no, but- um." he wasn't sure how to tell you how much he wanted to kiss you right now. those talks proved to be nothing but useless as he couldn't find the words he desperately wanted to speak.

it was only then had you noticed he had leaned half his body over you, nearly climbing into the hospital bed with you. the sudden realization caused you to widen your eyes, as you awkwardly hovered your hands in the air. it was like your body had been telling you to touch him, cradle his head but you didn't know how, or where.

the awkwardness had caused a small, nervous chuckle to erupt from your throat ; prompting shuichi's worried glances. were you laughing at him?

you felt him shrink away, and out of panic, you let your heart act before your brain could. your hands cupped his face, a quiet clapping noise echoing throughout the white hospital room walls and only seeming to make everything more strange than it had been.

shuichi held a shocked expression on his face, as you had practically been melting from how much you were sweating. fuck, did i mess this up?

no words had been exchanged, both of you, too bewildered and too nervous to say or do anything — the situation grew so bizarre that it literally left them speechless. with both pairs of eyes glued onto the others, neither of you moved — no matter how sore shuichi's arms had been getting from holding himself up not to crush you, and how with each agonizing second, you weren't sure whether or not to tighten your grip on his jaw.

"a-are you going to kiss me? or just stand there?"

"i-i can do that? really?" shuichi watched you closely for confirmation ; and you swore you felt him lean in closer to you — not that you were complaining. in any way. whatsoever.

"um, y-yeah. i-i consent, ha— mmf-!" shuichi hadn't bothered to hide his eagerness, lips already pressing and moving against yours like it was instinct, like it was something he had been waiting for for years.

your fingers ultimately tightened around his jaw, and you made the move to bring him further down onto you — to which wasn't a very good choice.

"w-wah! s/o, w-wait a second!" he muffled through your lips, golden eyes revealing themselves as he lifted his eyelids in a panic as you started pulling him down to you. he was unreasonably afraid of accidentally putting you in more pain ; but the electrifying feeling you had felt from his lips on yours had had the same cause and feeling as 10 million painkillers — you felt like you were in cloud 9 with a million tiny shuichi angels swimming and flying around you.

you promptly ignored him, craving more as you used one of your arms to hug him close to you — the position probably looked like you were trying to strangle him, but your lips on his said otherwise.

you two probably spent 30 minutes making out in your assigned hospital bed, but hey, it's not like anyone was waiting.

...i mean, just ignore the nurse awkwardly standing at the doorway and you're fine.

⊱───── ❝ thank you for reading! ❞ ─────⊰

[imonthinice]

The Criminal Psychology Majors, Jason Todd x Fem!Reader Part 3/?

Word Count: 1.5k

Author’s Note: Y/N - Your name, A/N -Any name (your best friend’s name)

Part 3! Date 2 is going to be underway with this one. Enjoy!

I had to change my pfp and my header cause they were being dickheads so just be aware if you liked looking at the batboys when clicking on my profile lmao <3

Warnings: Swearing, no beta bitch we die like Jason Todd, Dark humor.

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7) (Part 8) (Part 9) (Part 10) (Part 11) (Part 12) (Part 13) (Part 14) (Part 15)  (Part 16) (Part 17) (Part 18) (Part 19) (Part 20)

Y/N woke up the next day feeling like she could take on the world, energized, with a new crush, and full of life, a stark shift from how she usually was. She was never normally a morning person and had a severe addiction to caffeine. I mean, the addiction was still there and she still needed coffee before she could go to her 3pm class and meet up with Jason again, but she was happy. She would put on her clothes and pack her bag before even getting coffee.

“G’morning, A/N!”

“Who are you and what did you do with my best friend?” A/N joked.

“Down girl, I’m just peppy today, it’ll probably wear down and it’s probably a once-in-a-blue-moon deal,” Y/N said as she started brewing her coffee.

“You got a date with Jason today?”

“I do!”

“That explains it,” A/N joked again.

“Says the one with a boyfriend,” she shot back.

“He’s not my boyfriend, we’re just hooking up right now, trust me, if he was, you’d know, darlin’.”

“So what did dreamboat ask last night?” A/N asked.

“Well I said ‘What do you want to know?’ and he said ‘We’ll talk about it today, maybe during notes or maybe during our lunch date, we’ll see how i’m feeling.’ so I think that’s good?”

“You kidding? You got that man wrapped around your finger, respect.”

“Shut up.”

“No thanks, I have free speech y’know.”

“Yeah you can say whatever, but I can also use my free speech rights to tell you to shove it, so, checkmate,” you sneered at her.

“That’s fair,” A/N paused and then changed the subject, “Have you heard Brutal yet?” she asked.

“You’re damn right I have, I wonder where that was for me at 17. But to be fair, I would still blast it now at my parents just to make them irk.”

“They would kill you for listening to that song instead of their Christian Rock.”

“Worth it, I’ll die swinging and singing.” Y/N mused.

“It really is Brutal out here.”

“Leave, get out, that sucked, blocked, friendship over.”

---------------------------------

She walked up to her 3pm class, to be greeted by Jason at the door, with of course, her new knowledge of the tabloids and their minions, she questioned why he’d do this.

“Hey, Y/N.”

“’Afternoon, Jason.”

“I’m trying to give the tabloids a show, don’t mind me.” he mused.

“I’m not surprised, but class is in 5.”

“Then I guess we should sit down and get ready to write at lightning speeds.”

She went to sit down, followed close by Jason. She couldn’t help but notice everyone was staring, but she didn’t care. This is going to be fun, she thought, I’m glad they’re gonna get a fucking kick out of this, she finished her thought.

Class went on as usual, with her scribbling down the notes so quick her arms hurt by the end of it, and Jason just sitting around making sure she wasn’t losing her arms to the writing, and casually laughing at the Professor. Then, the Professor brought up Barry Allen. Dr. Barry Allen and what he does for the criminal psychology people. 

“Forensics go hand-in-hand with criminal psych, normally we can tell, as scholars, from the hitting of the weapon why and who might’ve done it.” The Professor said.

 She saw Jason tense up a bit, and whispered over to him;

“You know Dr. Barry Allen don’t you?”

“He’s my uncle,” he whispered back.

“Well, be sure to tell him I’ve read some of his essays when I wanted to go into forensics instead of criminal psychology.”

“Really? He has essays?”

“Many. Very good writing. 10/10.”

“You’re going to make his week if you keep talking like this.” he mused.

“Good.” you mocked.

---------------------------

“So, you’re intermixed with a renowned journalist, a legend in forensic testing and you’re the son of Bruce Wayne?” she asked Jason, she couldn’t believe the words coming out of her mouth, but there they were, all cards on the table.

“Yeah, I know this is all new to you but famous people tend to know other famous people.” he joked with her.

“Well that’s fair, I guess I kind of know Clark, I met him once at a office party with my mum.”

“He’d probably remember you.”

“Enough of your family ties, huh? You said you wanted to know more about me?”

“Yes, that, did you tell your roommate to pick up your car?” he asked her.

“I did, why was I meant to do that, by the way?” she asked him.

“Because, we, you and I, Y/N, are going to go for a joyride on my motorbike and try to get away from these,” he lowered his voice, “bitch ass cameras,” he grabbed her hand and started running towards his bike, dodging all the paparazzi who just wanted the snag shot of the two. They don’t even know my name, and they’re going off about this, she thought.

When the two met his bike, she looked over it fondly. This guy really likes his red, she thought, that’s fair, I do too.

“Nice bike.”

“Thank you, Y/N. We can ride this bad boy out to the country and try to escape the cameras, which kind of cuts into the lunch date, but hey-”

“That’s just the life someone famous has to live?” she questioned.

“You’re catching on.”

“I could have been a detective if I wanted it.”

He laughed and sat down on his bike and like instinct, she sat behind him and wrapped her hands on his chest and leant in. She didn’t know how to passenger a motorbike, but he didn’t say she did it wrong.

“You ready?”

“Jason, are you going to kill me?”

“Well if the shoe fits.” he mused.

“I’m ready.”

And off they went.

There was something about the way the bike drove through the streets of Gotham that she loved so much, she had already fallen in love with the restless city and called it home long before right now, but this was exhilarating for her. Somehow driving at 120mph was amazing, it brought out this feeling of freedom, something she hadn’t ever felt back home in Metropolis.

It’s worth it, she thought, it’s forever going to be worth it.

-------------------------------------

Pulling her off of his bike, the two of them laid underneath the tree on the small hill Jason pulled over by.

“Do you think we escaped the pap?” she asked him.

“Probably not.”

“Festive.”

“So, Y/N, it’s your turn to open up about your family. Besides your mum, I already know about your mum.”

“So, my twin sister goes to our rival school, the Metropolis one, I think she’s more of a people person than I’ll ever be. My parents are still together, they got married after they had my sister and I, so I’m a bastard,” she laughed, “I always like telling people I’m by definition a bastard, a lot of them get mad all like, ‘don’t call yourself that you’re a lovely girl’ and it’s just funny to me,”

He laughed, “You call yourself a bastard out of spite?”

“Am I supposed to not? I think it’s funny-”

“It’s pretty funny. I live out of spite too,” he said, almost like he was pulling out a bad memory, but she egged him on slightly,

“Spite who?” she asked.

“Spite God.”

She let out a laugh, and he seemed to let go of whatever memory he had clung onto to watch her laugh. It was clearly a distracting laugh.

“God tried to strike you and you just went ‘Nah mate, go away’? Respectable. I would do that.” she said while laughing.

“That’s exactly what happened, Y/N-” and his phone pinged, he turned it over, it was Dick.

“Mind sharing who that is?”

“I don’t mind, it’s my older brother sending me an article of us today. We really gave them a show holding hands,” he began reading, “ ‘Millionaire’s Son, Jason Todd, Caught Holding Hands with the Mystery Girl.’ “

“One day they will know my name. And it will be a massive article. Like a gender reveal.”

“Like a gender reveal?!” he said back to her, laughing so hard his smile reached ends she didn’t expect it to be able to go.

“It wasn’t that funny of a joke, Jason,” she said.

“It’s a better joke than my brothers and sister could ever come up with, Y/N, and they’ve had Galas to practice for,” he retorted.

“I’ll set it ablaze like the California gender reveal,” she continued with the joke, expecting this to be too far, but this also showed her that Jason liked dark humor, and she did too.

He burst out laughing at this, and she smiled.

“You have perfect teeth, Jason.”

“Is that what you’re focused on?” he asked.

“They are the forefront when you smile, it is hard not to.”

“Romantic,” he mocked her.

“I can be more romantic next date, if you want it,” she said, inclined towards him saying I want it. She was right.

“I want it.”

[eternally-writing]

chain reaction | jjk

genre: fluff and angst

rating: PG

pairing: Jungkook x reader

theme: college!au , enemies to lovers, series

word count: 1.3k

warnings: light swearing

synopsis: A semester with your mortal enemy, Jeon Jungkook, as your lab partner was bound to be an experience to remember.

banner by me!

A/N: hey everyone! This is my first series that I’m writing and I’m so excited to share it with all of you! If you want to be tagged in future parts, reblog and mention that you want to be tagged in the caption, or you can send me an ask!

--♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡--

“You’re late”

Swinging your backpack onto the lab bench beside you, you glare at your lab partner.

“Shut up Jeon, it’s only 8:04am and our TA hasn’t even finished introducing the lab yet”.

Introduction to Organic Chemistry was all set up to be your favorite class. You were a chemistry genius in high school, your professor had amazing “rate my professor” reviews, and the class fit perfectly into your schedule, finishing right at 2:00pm so you could walk back to your dorm under the radiance of the afternoon sun.

It was all going well until you walked into your 8:00AM lab and found that due to budget cuts, all labs would now be done in pairs. And you had been paired with none other than the bane of your existence, Jeon Jungkook. As if doing an amide reduction wasn’t hard enough on its own, you had to do it alongside the biggest thorn in your side.

You couldn’t quite pinpoint exactly what it was about him that irked you so much. Maybe it was the way the girls tried to flirt with his constantly over the open flame of a Bunsen burner, or the way that he sucks up to your extremely old TA in order to get full marks on his procedural skills, or maybe it’s the fact that he somehow managed to look effortlessly put together at 8am on a Tuesday morning, while you looked (and felt) like absolute crap.

Either way, you were counting down the seconds until this semester would be over and you wouldn’t have to look at Jeon Jungkook again, but time seemed to be moving extra slow today.

“Late and spacing out today? Wow, lucky me to have you as a lab partner.”

Scoffing at him, you adjusted your protective glasses and readied your labware for today.

“180 minutes until I’m free. That’s it,” you thought to yourself.

“Technically it’s 170 minutes now, but if we don’t get started someone soon so we can hand in our product by 11am, we’re going to be here for a lot longer than that.”, snapped Jungkook next to you, already starting to mix chemicals together in a beaker.

Well, looks like your habit of accidentally saying things out loud gets worse when you’re tired.

“Let’s just try and get through this lab today without stepping on each other’s toes Jeon, okay?” you said, trying to catch up to Jungkook in the lab.

There was one part of chemistry labs you disliked the most. The waiting time. In some labs it was only 30 minutes, while in other labs it had taken almost an hour, but the constant in all of the situations was that waiting made it feel like time was passing at an infinitely slower rate. Taking out your laptop would violate lab safety protocol, and you couldn’t do any further steps in your lab until your reaction in your solution was done progressing under the fume hood. Since there were no other options, the only other thing left to do in moments like this was talk to Jeon Jungkook.

“So I was -”

“What did you -”

Yikes, add the awkwardness of starting conversation with Jeon Jungkook to the reasons you never talk to him.  You decided to pause and let him carry on with whatever he was saying, giving him a semi-pleasant smile to hopefully help distract from the embarrassment you were feeling.

“I was going to ask what you wanted to do our lab presentation on,” said Jungkook.

Your eyes widened at his statement. Looking at the whiteboard situated at the side of the room, you saw that in the 4 minutes you were late to your lab you may not have missed your TA explaining the procedure, but you did the big words on the board that said:

“FINAL LAB PRESENTATION: 3 weeks from now, worth 20% of your grade, done with your lab. 5-10 page paper and 10-15 minute oral presentation”.

Unable to contain your discontentment with the situation, you let out a groan and leaned back in your chair in frustration, almost falling off your lab stool in the process.

“Well aren’t you just little Miss Sunshine today? I’m not thrilled about this either, but I’d rather pull out my eyelashes than have to repeat this course again next semester,” scoffed Jungkook.

No morning ice coffee + Jeon Jungkook being annoying + a looming group project was more enough to make your head hurt.

“Can we just talk about this later Jeon? My brain can’t process this right now,” you pleaded as you put your head in your hands.

Leaning closer to you, Jungkook spoke at a whisper-level near your ear so nobody else would hear.

“Is your brain too busy processing my charm, sunshine? Don’t worry, I’ll try and tone down the charisma for you,” he joked with a smirk.

Your head went from being in your hands to plopping flat onto your (no longer sterile) lab counter at Jungkook’s comment.

First of all, ew. You don’t know how Jungkook was possibly picking up girls by talking like that. Second of all, charm and charisma were probably two words that you would NEVER associate with Jungkook, so his statement was definitely wrong.

A project with Jungkook meant that you would be spending a LOT more time with him, and the prospect of that happening made you wince internally. Group projects meant libraries, evenings, and , ugh, probably weekends with Jeon Jungkook.

You were snapped out of your internal despair by the sound of Jungkook’s voice.

“Hand me your phone.”

You froze. “Hm?”

“Well I don’t know what you think of me Y/N, but unless you think I can read your mind we’re  going to need to text to figure out when to meet.”

Giving in, you quickly tossed your phone into his open palm while grabbing his phone which was sitting on top of his backpack.

Glancing over his shoulder, you took a peek at your contact name.

“little miss sunshine? really Jeon?”

“Of course sunshine, i had to pick a name that encapsulated your positive and radiant energy,” he retorted, sarcasm practically dripping off of his words.

You definitely were picking your battles today, and one over a silly contact name didn’t seem to be worth it.

“You can do whatever, Jeon, but you’re sticking in my phone as “Jeon Boy” and there’s nothing you can do about it.”

“We’ll see about that Y/N,” remarked Jungkook as he opened up his lab manual to read the next steps in the procedure.

Your mom had always taught you that the word “hate” was a very strong word and was only to be used in extreme situations. To this day, there were only 3 people in your life that you truly hated in every sense of the word: your ex-boyfriend, Jimin, your ENGL 101 Professor, Dr.Lee, and your neighbor’s cat, Mr. Whiskers, who chewed up your grade 8 science project the day before it was due.

You wouldn’t say that you hate Jungkook, but you were definitely getting close.

“Yknow, I don’t like you Jeon. Actually, scratch that, I really don’t like you.”

Glancing over at the timer on your lab bench finally reaching 0:00, Jungkook began walking over to the fume hood. Turning back to you, he smirked and started to speak.

“Well, the feeling’s mutual sunshine.”

Boy, this was definitely going to be a long semester.

--♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡--

If you want to be tagged in future parts, reblog and mention that you want to be tagged in the caption (or you can send me an ask)!

If you liked what you read, please write/follow! Thank you for reading♡

- Emily

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

What are your thoughts on Near and Mello (Death Note)? You don’t seem to like them as characters

I was about to say that I don’t necessarily dislike them, but, honestly, I do. I really really do.

And hey, look at that, I get to offend an entirely new fandom. 

To be honest though I’m not even sure where to begin.

I suppose I’ll start with the concept of the orphan heirs to the title of L.

Wammy’s Dog Fighting Arena for Boys

Death Note is a fantastic and brilliant anime, however, every once in a while more general anime tropes sneak through and cause it to fall flat on its face. We have L, who for reasons is a sugar addicted man child (well, I actually have thoughts on L, who I quite like, but my theory is that he is the way he is because he’s a jackass who fully intends to be that off putting).

The Wammy orphan bit is the worst of this. We have an orphanage of... children competing for the title of L, an anonymous detective that Watari made up. These children are all super serial geniuses who are even weirder and less socially adjusted than L. Just, kill me.

Even the premise for why they exist is bad. The authors’ in the Death Note guide admit that, when they realized they were going to kill off L, they realized they had a major problem. They didn’t want a repeat arc with another L as a nemesis, SO THEY BROUGHT US TWO Ls, THAT’S COMPLETELY DIFFERENT!

Why I call it anime derp is that the whole ridiculous Wammy’s concept is never addressed. Wammy’s existence, the little we do know of L’s backstory, makes Watari the level of skeevy reserved for manipulative Dumbledore.

The man uses these children and pits them against each other in a high stakes intellectual environment where they stake their entire worth on their still developing intelligence.

In canon, we see what this has done to Mello, L, Matt, and Near. All of them are completely messed up human beings and they either die or never get better. L is an utter jackass who cares very little about justice. Mello becomes an actual gangster and uses the Death Note to make hits on rival gang members (not to mention Sayu, but we’ll get into that). Matt also becomes a gang member and kidnaps multiple women. Near cannot function, at all, in society and when we catch up to him ten years later in that hilariterrible one-shot he’s gotten even worse.

If we’re taking LABB as canon then you have Beyond Birthday who becomes a serial murderer and lights himself on fire in a desperate, insane, attempt to show up L. We have reference to A who killed himself under the pressure of trying to become L. 

We can presume there’s been other orphaned children, who had nowhere else to go and no one to protect them, that Wammy just destroyed so that he could have Batman.

Death Note, however, never touches this with a ten foot pole.

Instead these are our weird and quirky band of heroes who are so weird because... it’s anime and we like weird! Weird means you’re a super genius! Yay genius orphanage!

So, right at the very idea of Wammy’s existing, they already have to win me back. Mello and Near do not win me back.

Mello is a Thug

We’re supposed to feel very bad for Mello, he’s always been second to Near and this messes him up, and he leaves to try and find his own path. I’d say god bless him, you go Mello, except his own path turns out to become a gangster.

Mello’s not a remotely good guy.

Just because he’s pitted himself against Light, and tells us he’s sticking it to Kira and Near at the same time, does not make him remotely good. And that’s what irks me about him, Mello is a great skeezy character, but the story actively wants me to think he’s the hero.

It’s sort of like trying to convince me that Kylo-Ren is secretly a great guy. It’s really hard to sell me on that when we watch Mello in real time and, more, why are we even bothering? Let Mello be the scumbag he is.

First, Mello steals a weapon of mass destruction and immediately begins using it. It’s not about solving the Kira case for him, or at least, it’s certainly not about stopping Kira. It’s about showing up Near, L, and all those who never believed in him. 

That Mello, first, not only steals the notebook from the government, but then gets it into the hands of gangsters, AND THEN USES IT TO ASSASSINATE HIS RIVALS. Well, suffice to say, you do you Mello.

More, this is a guy who tortures, murders, and probably rapes multiple people to get this to happen. Mello’s attempts to retrieve the notebook start with the kidnapping of Japan’s head of the police force. He then kidnaps Light Yagami’s younger sister and... Something very bad happens to Sayu.

We never get confirmed what happen, we don’t see much of her in captivity or much after, however immediately after the events we see her in a wheelchair. At the end of the series, Sayu is catatonic and barely able to express emotion.

It’s highly implied she was raped.

With the kidnapping of Takada, regardless of what you think of her... Nothing good was going to come of that. Mello resorts to the tactics of terrorists just so he can prove he’s a big man.

Further, Mello’s brilliance is never really that brilliant. Yes, he gets the notebook (though notably does not hold it long and loses his name in the process). However, his big win at the end is supposed to be him having realized Mikami would mess up were he to kidnap Takada. He had no guarantee of this, frankly, I think he was just kidnapping Takada in an act of desperation. Because that’s what Mello does when he runs out of ideas: he kidnaps people close to Light Yagami and sees what happens.

This gets both him and Matt brutally killed.

Near’s a Moron

Near is so weird and so maladjusted, my god, and he’s such a pretentious ass. He’s just... knock off L in every way. Which, granted, is kind of what he’s supposed to be. Except that the story never capitalizes on this. 

We see hints of it, Near trying desperately to live up to L’s name and mantle, but it never really delves into it.

More, what we do see of Near’s plans...

I really want to go into the one-shot epilogue, because that said so much about Near, but I’ll resist.

Instead I’ll note that L was 13 days from proving Light’s guilt. It takes Near and Mello combined five years, and Mikami’s dumb ass, to get to the same place. And even then, they nearly all died if Matsuda had been a worse shot.

Near has no idea that he’s nowhere near as brilliant as L. Instead, he gives us the world’s most hamfisted, frustrating, lecture at the end of the series where he tells us that Light was so stupid and that together he and Mello triumphed over evil.

Good for you, Near, I’m so happy for you.

I Just Don’t See the Point of Them

The second half of Death Note, in general, is a slough. It’s not just me saying this, you ask the majority of the fanbase, and they’ll admit it all goes downhill with L’s death.

I think the authors desperately wanted to avoid writing the dystopian politics of what would happen if Light won unopposed. They wanted a detective thriller, the trouble was, that story ended with L’s death.

So they try to feed us the same, but worse, story twice, and it just doesn’t work.

Personally, what I’d rather have seen is Matsuda and company slowly but surely realizing Light is Kira and Matsuda, in the end, having no choice but to assassinate him as they just cannot get any proof. It’s a very different story, but it would have been such a good story of betrayal that, again we sort of got hints of, but never really confronted.

Alternatively, keep Naomi Misora alive, and have her be the spearhead of brilliance we need. As it was, I am eternally sad/amused that she was killed off because she was too damn smart for the series (the authors admit she figured everything out too fast and as a result had to be eliminated).

Just, please, not genius orphan children. 

[xbaepsae]

same old mistakes (m)

“But it wasn’t that you necessarily regretted sleeping with Hoseok. No, you very much enjoyed it—maybe too much—which is why it was wrong. So fucking wrong.”

[rich boy!hoseok x reader]

genre: country club!au, smut, slightly angsty, some fluff

word count: 12.8k

rating: mature

warnings: sex. lots and lots of unprotected sex lmao (please use protection), slight rough sex, some jealousy, rich prick asshole jung hoseok, mentions of alcohol, language, golf terminology (i’m sorry if it’s wrong idk anything about golf LMAO) oblivious mutual pining lol

a/n: omg this fic absolutely consumed me these last few weeks. i haven’t been able to think about anything else, which is why i haven’t been super active lol. so glad i finished this before the upcoming valentine’s holiday and hobi’s birthday <3 loved writing this so much! rich asshole hoseok has my heart. xoxo

You have never felt more flustered in your life.

It’s the summer after your first year of college, and you decided to come home—to spend a little time with your mother and her new husband. Well, more like she begged you to come home. You actually wanted to visit your roommate’s family on the coast, and spend your days at the beach, but your mother insisted that you come home instead.

Now that you are home, she doesn’t even have time to spend with you. She and her husband are too busy vacationing; that should’ve been you. You can’t even bear to look at your roommate’s Instagram account. And worse of all, your mother signed you up for a job you did not consent to.

“You did what?”

Your mother blinked back at you, feigning innocence. “I heard from Mrs. Lee—you know, our neighbor down the street that attends the local country club—and she said that they were hiring for the summer. You know how rich people love their golf and fancy dinners.”

“And you just decided to volunteer me?” You couldn’t believe her. “I don’t want to work at some prissy country club.”

“Weren’t you just complaining about being broke last week?” She really did not need to expose you like that. “This’ll be good for you, honey.”

Thus, you found yourself standing in front of the country club not even a week later. They hadn’t even asked you to do an interview; you just talked to a manager on the phone and she said for you to just come in. Honestly, too suspiciously easy but what could you do about it? Your mother had been right—you did need the money.

When you arrived, you were immediately whisked away into training. There, one of the girls, Soyoung, fitted you into the uniform—a plain white polo and khaki shorts—and told you what you’d be doing here.

“So, there are a lot of different areas here,” she began, “as you can see from how big this country club is. So, you might find yourself working in different areas occasionally…but for now, you’re going to be on the course with the drink cart.”

Soyoung explained that as the drink cart girl, you’d be driving a golf cart around while handing out beer and other drinks to the golfers on the course. It seemed easy enough, except you’d never driven a golf cart before…or tried to sell people something. However, Soyoung assured you it was easy.

But that was about an hour ago. Since then, a lot has happened. You managed to get the golf cart to work, but it is considerably different from an actual car. The forward/backwards switches were tripping you up. Because of that, you already knocked over a display…or two.

Which leads you to your most embarrassing moment.

For some reason, you forgot that being back in your hometown means the possibility of running into people you went to high school with. The thought just didn’t seem to come to mind. Being off at university has made you forget about all of those idiots you used to be around every day. Until now, when you bump into one of them. Literally.

You really hadn’t seen him behind you; then again, you weren’t looking, which was probably not the greatest idea. But you blindly backed up and hit him. Not that you were going fast or anything, but he did cause an outburst.

“Oh my—fuck! Watch where you’re going!”

Horrified, you press onto the breaks. Turning around, an apology begins to fall from your lips. “I am so sorry. It’s my first time—”

“Y/n?”

You freeze at the voice; it sounds awfully familiar. Blinking a few times, your eyes focus on the person in front of you. And your stomach sinks. Standing in front of you is none other than Jung Hoseok—the last person you ever expected to see again.

He must see the recognition fill your eyes because he instantly smirks. “Wow, it really is you. It’s been a while, huh? Haven’t seen you since graduation.”

An awkward laugh passes through your teeth. “Yeah…it really has.”

“Didn’t expect to see you here,” his smirk seems to widen, and his eyes travel down to your clothes. “You work here or something?”

“Yeah…just started today, actually.”

He nods appreciatively. “Nice. Well, I’m here almost every day, so, I’m sure we’ll be seeing a lot more of each other.”

I hope not. “Sure.”

Just as Hoseok opens his mouth to say something else, someone calls his name. He looks away from you, and that’s when you finally allow yourself a moment to look at him. For the first time, you realize how long a year is and how much change can happen in that time frame. Even though it irks you a bit to think about, he looks really good—even in his damn polo and khakis.

You take in the curved slope of his nose, the way his brows are perfectly arched to match his equally perfect eyes. And you’re almost blinded by his pearly white smile. Perhaps, Hoseok has always been attractive—dark, windswept hair and all. You’ve just never wanted to admit it; even after that one—

“Catch you around, y/n,” he suddenly says, and that’s when you realize he’s caught you. He smirks and shoots you a wink as he walks away, leaving you to mentally kick yourself alone.

***

In high school, you and Jung Hoseok were in different crowds. He was preppy and popular—kind of snooty, to be honest—and you were just normal. Not popular, but not a complete wallflower either. Despite not being in the same circles, you both had a few classes together; which meant that you knew each other decently well. At least, you knew enough about Hoseok that you wanted nothing to do with him.

Except for that one, momentarily lapse of judgment, your conscious suddenly reminds you. But you’d rather not think about that right now.

Another thing about Hoseok that you knew of was his background; he came from money—a lot of it, actually. You don’t know exactly what his family does, but they’re those old money types; the kind of rich people that have been rich forever. Which helped to explain his popularity in high school, and how he had a country club membership now.

You wished you knew that before you got the job here.

As you drive around the golf course, feeling more comfortable driving the cart now, you may or may not be on the lookout for Hoseok. Now that you know he’s here, your eyes seem to search for him everywhere. And it’s not because you want to see him; you want to avoid him, if possible.

It’s not until you’re halfway through the course that you see him with a group of other guys, which—to your displeasure—are also people you went to high school with. It’s fitting though, you presume, considering they were all close then as well.

You don’t know anything about golf, but you watch as Hoseok lines up his club to the ball. He swings only once, and the ball flies. You follow where it goes and watch as it hits the grass and rolls right into the hole. His friends cheer for him as he turns around with a smug look on his face. “And that, everyone, is how you fucking do it.”

“Nice, man,” one person—who you recognize as Jeon Jeongguk—says, moving to pat him on the back.

“The motherfucking GOAT,” another—Kim Namjoon—laughs.

“Maybe you should just go pro or something, dude,” the last guy says, and you recognize him as Kim Seokjin. “Because you’ve hit an ace, birdie or eagle at every hole.”

Hoseok laughs at that. “Maybe I’m just lucky today.”

“Dude probably just had good ass last night,” Namjoon smirks. “So, who was it?”

“A gentleman does not kiss and tell, my friend,” Hoseok winks, and you can’t help but roll your eyes at the banter between all of these men. Disgusting. “But if you really want to know…”

“Not you trying to get Hoseok’s sloppy seconds,” Seokjin speaks directly to Namjoon. “Because we all know how that went the first time with—”

“It wasn’t my fault Katie caught feelings,” Hoseok interrupts, walking back towards the rest of his friends. “I told her it was a one-time thing.”

Jeongguk struggles not to laugh as he moves up to line his club and ball. “And then you introduced her to Namjoon.”

“And she used him to get closer to…” Seokjin starts to say, but then he notices you. You’ve never seen someone straighten up so quickly. “How long have you been sitting there?”

“Long enough,” you say as three pairs of eyes turn to look in your direction as well. “Um, drinks?”

“Took you long enough to get here, y/n. I was starting to wonder when you’d arrive,” Hoseok takes a step in your direction, and you watch as the rest of the guys do a double take.

Namjoon is the first to speak, “Ah…y/n. Yes, I remember you…we had chemistry together, right?”

“Oh my gosh, you were in my calculus class!” Jeongguk exclaims, golf club still mid-air.

“I don’t think we had any classes together,” Seokjin says with a pout. “Because if we did, I would’ve remembered you for sure.”

For some reason, you feel your cheeks get hotter. “Um, thanks?”

You can tell they want to say more to you, but Hoseok shoots his friends a look you can’t see, and they close their mouths immediately. Turning back to you, he takes another step close to your golf cart. “A beer for each of us.”

“Aren’t you all underage—”

“No one cares here, y/n,” he cuts you off with a smirk. “Besides, Seokjin’s father owns this country club—we can do whatever the fuck we want.”

Shock passes through you at this news, mouth dropping at the realization that Hoseok and his friends might be more privileged than you originally thought.

“And we don’t usually have to pay for anything, but”—he fishes for something in his pocket— “here.”

You look down at his extended hand, where a crumpled 100-dollar bill sits, and practically gawk at it. Who carries such large bills around so casually? “What—?”

“Keep the change,” he stares you right in the eyes, and you have no other choice but to accept the money.

“Thanks,” you manage to say before reaching around to grab four beers from the cooler.

As each bottle is plucked from your hands, Hoseok is the last person to grab his; and the way his fingers accidentally touch your own seems like no accident at all. Although it was only for a few seconds at most, his touch leaves your skin burning. Burning for what? You don’t know; but it lingers the rest of your shift in a way that is so distracting, you nearly hit someone else with the golf cart.

***

“So let me get this story straight, you saw a guy you fucked for the first time in a year and now you don’t know what to do with yourself. Worst of all, his presence at your new job is going to be the death of you.”

You cringe at your roommates’ words. “God, why do you have to say it like that.”

“I mean, that’s who he is right?” her voice echoes through the screen.

She’s not wrong, but it still doesn’t sit right with you. “When you say it like that, it’s just weird.”

“Y/n, you act like you haven’t fucked other guys before.”

“Yes, but what happened with Jung Hoseok was a mistake,” you breathe. “It was never supposed to happen.”

Her pixilated expression softens upon seeing your clear distress. “I understand, babe. We all do things we regret.”

But it wasn’t that you necessarily regretted sleeping with Hoseok. No, you very much enjoyed it—maybe too much—which is why it was wrong. So fucking wrong. It wasn’t like he coerced you into that bedroom; you willingly followed him inside. And you can’t even blame it on the alcohol because you had been as sober as the day you were born.

It was graduation weekend, and everyone had come out to celebrate. You really didn’t want to go, but some of your friends forced you. Just enjoy the time we still have together, y/n, they had said. Ironic, because you no longer spoke to any of them.

Around the fire, behind the massive patio of someone’s house, drinks were poured and passed around. Even though you held a red solo cup in your hand, the murky liquid didn’t draw you in; you hated the way alcohol tasted back then. Still kind of do. But you simply pretended like you were enjoying yourself.

Every single part of you wanted to leave early that night, but you didn’t. You ended up staying because of Hoseok. It was something about the way he carried himself at that bonfire that night. Before, you never saw him as anything more than a spoiled brat; however, the flames of the fire seemed to soften him before your eyes. Because before you knew it, Hoseok pulled you away from the stares of everyone else.

You don’t even remember what happened—what you two talked about or didn’t talk about. But something happened before he kissed you. Unfortunately, it’s all a blur now.

After swelling your lips with, what seemed like, a thousand kisses, he told you he wanted more; and you told him yes. The memory of him rushing with you through the house and into a vacant room still burns hotly in your mind. You had been giddy with nerves and excitement as he pushed you against the closed door, sucking the air from your lungs.

Hoseok ripped your clothes off with practiced hands, clearly experienced with this, and made you come undone more times than you can recall. Throughout this whole exchange, not much was said; but no words were needed when he could read your body so well.

The both of you ended up falling asleep like that—tangled in each other’s arms. And when you woke up a few hours later to the rising sun, horror filled your veins like a shock of ice.

You left without saying anything. Not that you think he would’ve cared either way. Jung Hoseok seemed like he would be used to stuff like that.

You just never thought you’d see him again one year later.

But here he is.

***

During your next few weeks at the country club, you try your best to avoid Hoseok.

This, however, proves difficult to do since you can hear his laughter echoing everywhere. From the hallways to the range, you can’t seem to escape him at all. And it doesn’t help that his friends all seem to be around too.

Every time you catch even the smallest glimpse of him, you turn in the opposite direction. You aren’t sure if he can tell that you’re avoiding him or not, but you don’t care—you just want to get this summer over with already.

“Y/n!”

Turing in the direction your name is being called, you see Soyoung walking towards you. You offer her a tight smile, hoping she isn’t here to tell you that you’re in trouble or something. “Soyoung. What’s up?”

“Do you mind helping me clean up a little by the pool? I know you just got done on the range, but a girl called out and I could really use the help.” She gives you this sad puppy look, which means you can’t refuse her offer. So, begrudgingly, you follow her back outside.

In the hot summer sun, the large crystal blue pool looks like temptation. Soyoung notices your face and laughs. At her laughter, you realize you’ve never seen the pool this close. You pass by the canopy lined pool lounge every day, but you’re not a maid here or on lifeguard duty so you’ve never had a reason to linger very long.

“Looks inviting, huh?”

All you can do is hum in agreement as you begin helping Soyoung pick up disserted pool towels and throwing them into the hamper. As you’re bending down to retrieve a particularly wet towel on the concrete, the hot sun beating down your back is suddenly gone. You look up and notice there’s a shadow blocking the sun—a suspiciously familiar shadow.

Immediately, your back straightens, and you turn around to face a shirtless Hoseok. His hair is wet from the pool, which means beads of water are cascading down his chest. You try not to stare, but he’s literally so close; there’s nowhere else to look. Your eyes follow the towel in his hand as he begins to dry himself up, going from his abdomen before they travel down to the dark trail of hair that leads to—

You freeze and force your eyes back up, but the smile on his face tells you that you got caught—again.

“Like what you see?” His smile seems to grow wider at your expression.

You scowl. “In your dreams, Jung Hoseok.”

He leans down, face inches from yours, whispering, “If I remember correctly, that dream already came true…one year ago.”

Before you can say anything, he stands back up to his full height and brushes past you—his naked skin burning holes through your clothes. Once he’s a few steps away from you, you realize his friends were also there the whole time. Embarrassment burns your cheeks at what they might’ve thought, but their expressions remain too ambiguous for you to read as they follow their friend.

“I didn’t know you knew Hoseok.”

Your head whips towards Soyoung. “I don’t…I mean, not really. We just went to high school together.”

But your coworker doesn’t seem to buy it. “Really? I’ve been working here for a few summers and those guys have always been around, especially because Seokjin’s dad is the owner. I’ve tried to make small talk with them a few times, but they’re pretty intimidating.”

“They’re pricks,” you tell her. “Typical entitled rich boys.”

“I suppose so,” she hums, throwing the last towel into the bin. “Anyway, can I ask for another favor?”

All you can do is nod. “What?”

“I have another thing I have to do,” Soyoung starts, making you realize she works pretty hard here, “so, can you put these towels in the laundry room? You don’t have to start a load or anything; just leave them and one of the maids will wash them later.”

She slips the laundry room key into your pocket, telling you to give it back to her later, as she rushes off to her next task. Which leaves you to find the laundry room by yourself. After nearly ten minutes of searching, you find it tucked in a small hallway.

Opening the door, you push the dirty towel hamper into the room. You look around and see multiple washers, dryers, and a lot of storage shelves filled with miscellaneous items. You’re so caught up in looking around the room that you almost don’t hear the door close. At the sound of the lock clicking into place, you turn around; immediately, your heart starts beating faster.

“What are you doing in here?”

Hoseok leans against the door, no longer shirtless like before, and smirks at you. “I was following you.”

Like that’s not weird at all. “Stalker much?”

“Just wanted to know why you’ve been avoiding me, that’s all,” he pushes off the door, taking a step closer. You unconsciously take a step back, hitting the hamper.

“I haven’t been avoiding you,” you lie.

He just blinks at you. “You’re a bad liar, you know that?”

You’re shocked that he can read you so well. “Okay, so what if I am avoiding you? It’s not like you should care. Just leave me alone.”

For a brief moment, something passes over his eyes; but the emotion’s gone before you can think about it. “I don’t think I can do that.”

“What?” Now, it was your turn to blink rapidly.

Hoseok takes another step towards you, severing whatever distance there had been before. His arms move to cage you between himself and the dirty hamper. Slowly, he leans down, making sure not to move his eyes away from yours. “I can’t just leave you alone—not when you’re the only thing on my mind.”

“What are you trying to say—” his hand wrapping around your jaw shuts you up.

“To put it simply, I can’t stop thinking about you—about that night after graduation,” he says, eyes swirling with a darkness you know all too well.

“But that was a year ago,” you manage to say through clenched teeth, and he loosens his grip on you.

His signature smirk lights his lips. “So?”

“I was drunk,” you lie again. “I don’t even remember what happened.”

“So, you’re telling me you don’t remember this?” One hand curves around your hip. “Or this?” Another wraps around your waist. “Or this?” He plants his lips onto your jaw.

You release a harsh breath as the memories of that night come flooding back. Heat begins to pool in your stomach from his touch. As he peppers kisses along your jaw and down your neck, your hands move to fist his shirt. Just as a moan threatens to leave your throat, he pulls away.

Your lips part in indignation at the loss of touch, and Hoseok just smirks even wider. “I thought you said you don’t remember?”

“I’m going to kill you, Jung Hoseok,” your frustration is through the roof.

“Tell me you remember.”

Right now, there are two sides of you fighting. There’s one part of you that wants to tell Hoseok you don’t remember a single thing—that you really had been drinking graduation night. But there’s an even larger part of you that wants him so bad—to feel the same high you felt a year ago.

So, you settle with, “But I’m working right now.”

Hoseok’s eyes turn obsidian as his smirk drops. “I’ll be quick.”

He pulls you away from the hamper and pushes you, stomach first, against one of the washers. Suddenly, you realize what’s about to happen and you try to force the dopey smile off your face by biting your lip. In one swift motion, he unbuttons and pulls both your shorts and panties down to your ankles. By the sudden coolness below, you already know you’re soaking.

And Hoseok must realize this too because you feel him swipe a long finger over your folds. You instinctively jerk back, letting out a moan at the slight pressure. “Hoseok—”

“Fuck, y/n, you’re so wet for me already,” he groans, using a second finger against your wetness. He slowly rubs your clit and you can’t help but tighten your grip against the cool machine. “Wonder if you’ve been wet since we saw each other earlier.”

You roll your eyes. Typical, cocky Jung Hoseok. “Of course not, you douchebag.”

“I beg to differ,” he hums, inserting a single digit inside of you. “So tight—just like I remembered. Tell me, y/n, has anyone else had the pleasure to fuck your pretty pussy after me?”

His words cause you tense for a moment, before replying, “Yes, asshole. I went to college. What do you think?”

“I’m thinking that I’m about to fuck you so good,” he starts and finishes with a whisper, “that you won’t remember any of them.”

If you weren’t already turned on before, you were now. Hoseok continues to fuck with his finger, slowly adding a second one, edging you until you’re a panting mess before him. “S-Stop teasing—I thought you said you were going to be quick?”

“I will be,” he promises, and you can hear him pushing the waistband of his swim trunks down. You’re dying to see his cock again, so you turn and nearly drool at the sight of his angry red tip. For some reason, he looks bigger than you remember and that worries you a little. “What? Think it won’t fit?”

You raise your eyes to look at his, and he has the sexiest expression on his face you’ve ever seen. “No. It fit before, right?”

He licks his lips as he brings his cock close to your entrance, brushing his head back and forth against your clit. You turn back around, arching your back more in hopes that he’ll finally just stick it inside already. But before you can get too lost in the moment, you gasp.

“What’s wrong?” He actually sounds concerned.

“Do you have a condom?” you ask, facing him again. And by the pained expression on his face, he doesn’t. You let out a frustrated groan at getting all worked up for nothing. You’re about to reach down for your panties when he pushes you back into place. “What?”

“Are you on the pill?”

“Yes,” you answer, “but the pill is only—”

“I’ll pull out,” he says. “And I’m clean, I swear.”

You look into his eyes and seeing the desperation in them makes you want to indulge him. “I’m clean too.”

Hoseok breathes a sigh of relief. “Thank fucking god.”

“You better pull out, or I swear Jung—”

You fail to get the rest of your words out because he slams his cock into you. And you’re right—he is bigger than you remember. He bottoms out at your cervix and you feel like a mess already. You both moan at the feeling of being connected like this again, after so long, and Hoseok keeps his promise and wastes no time.

He thrusts into you hard and fast, leaving you to do nothing but take everything he has to give. “Fuck, Hoseok—oh my god.”

Earlier, he talked about fucking your past sexual exploits out of you, but there was no need to mention anything at all; no one compares to him. They never had a chance.

“Shit, you feel so good wrapped around me,” he groans, digging his fingers into your hips.

And soon enough, you feel your orgasm approaching. It’s slow building, but it’s there and you want it. You figure you’ll just chase it yourself. Reaching a hand down, you find your clit and begin rubbing it. But just as soon as you feel yourself get closer to the high you desire, your hand is ripped away.

There is a sudden weight on your back as Hoseok whispers in your ear, “That’s my job, sweetheart.”

His fingers find your sensitive nub and you come immediately, screaming a string of curses into your arms in hopes that no one hears you. As you ride your high, you feel him pull out. With a groan, his cum spills all over your ass.

As you try to catch your breath and calm your erratic heart, you feel Hoseok pull his shorts back up and take a step back. All of the sudden, a strange feeling builds up in your chest. Is this what loss feels like? But you don’t have much time to dwell on your own thoughts because you feel a towel wiping your body.

You turn and see Hoseok cleaning the mess he made; but instead of looking down, he’s looking right at you.

“What?” you ask, sounding defensive.

“Nothing,” he says, and you hate that you can’t read people well. You wish you could know what he’s thinking right now.

After he cleans between your thighs, you pull your clothes back up your body. You still have a few hours left of your shift, so you hope you don’t look too much like a mess right now. Pulling your hair into a low ponytail, you feel awkwardness hit you like a truck. What are you supposed to say now?

“Uh…I have to go,” you can’t even look at him. “We have a meeting this afternoon…”

You don’t have a meeting, but you don’t know what else to say. But unlike you, Hoseok can take a hint and nods. “I’ll leave first…see you around…and thanks.”

He stares at you for a moment longer before leaving the room. You look out to make sure he’s a considerable distance away before you follow, ducking into the bathroom to check your appearance. Once you look into the mirror, you barely recognize the person you’re seeing.

The girl in front of you has flushed cheeks and sweaty hair.

You spend the rest of your shift daydreaming about what happened. In all honesty, your body aches in the best possible way. And even after your shift, once you get home and lay in your bed, you’re still thinking about everything.

Did you really willingly have sex with Jung Hoseok a second time? Once is a mistake, twice clearly means there was choice involved. What would your roomie say if she knew? You don’t plan on telling her—at least, not until you get back to school. If she knew you had succumbed to his charms this early in the summer, she’d chew you out for sure. Besides, you won’t let it happen again.

There will be no more slip ups this summer.

***

“Oh, fuck—yes. Right there…!”

You cling to the shelf as Hoseok fucks you from behind. Your legs feel impossibly weak from being in such an uncomfortable position, but you couldn’t care less right now—you just want to come.

“Don’t be so loud, sweetheart,” he groans through clenched teeth. “Don’t want to get caught now, do we?”

“N-No…but if you d-don’t make me c-come quicker, Hoseok…” you moan, and he proceeds to thrust faster. You don’t want to scream, but it just feels so fucking good for you not to. “I’m going to—”

Hoseok clamps a hand over your mouth as you come undone. Your eyes shut on their own accord as you scream into his hand, body shaking from the impact of your orgasm. He curses, probably from how tight you’re gripping his cock, but continues to thrust a few more times before pulling out and painting you in strings of milky white.

Once your body shops shaking, he pulls you up and presses a kiss onto your exposed shoulder. “You’re amazing.”

You can’t help but smile a little. “Thanks.”

The two of you quickly clean up and readjust your clothes. You’re supposed to be organizing after all—at the place you are working at for the summer—not fucking an old high school classmate. Hoseok leaves with a promise of finding you later, and you’re left alone with your thoughts again.

What just happened?

You really did mean it when you said that you didn’t want to have sex with Hoseok again, but here you are anyway. It’s already been a month since the first incident, and you’ve been sneaking quickies around the entire country club with Hoseok.

Every time you think you’re alone, he manages to find you and that infuriating smirk makes you helpless. You’ve lost track of how many times he’s already managed to make your panties drop. But even though he seeks you out for sex, every now and then he sticks around to have a conversation with you.

You feel your resolve crumbling away every time you get a glimpse of the human Hoseok.

“So, what are you studying in school?” he asked one day, settling beside you on the floor of the laundry room.

“Is it bad that I’m undecided?” You tried to laugh it off, but the sober expression on his face stopped you.

He shook his head. “No, you have time.”

And just like, all felt okay in the world.

“What about you?” you managed to ask.

The scrunch of his nose had been nearly undetectable, but you noticed it. “Business. My father wants me to take over the company one day.”

“And you don’t?” the question slipped past your lips without a second thought. You’d been horrified.

“I don’t mind business, but I don’t want my father’s. I’d rather start my own.”

This truth had been rather insightful, and you couldn’t help but change the way you looked at Hoseok—only a little though. You still thought he was an asshole.

After another moment pondering your idiocy, you go back to whatever you were doing before. Just as you place the last shampoo bottle on the rack, a knock sounds on the door. You jump, wondering if it’s Hoseok again; but when it opens, it’s just Soyoung. “Hey—you’ve been in here for a while. Almost done?”

If only she knew.

“Uh, yeah. Actually, just finished,” you try to smile. “Got a little distracted in here, I guess.” A little more than distracted.

Soyoung offers an understanding expression. “Feel that. These storage rooms can be a bit overwhelming.”

“Did you need something?” you ask, changing the conversation.

“I actually bring word from our manager. You don’t work tomorrow night, right?” Tomorrow is Saturday and one of the few days you actually have off this week. You’re dreading what Soyoung is about to tell you. “She asked if you could come in for a few hours—just to help with dinner. They’re expecting a big crowd tomorrow night since there’s a fundraiser happening during the day. It’ll be like three hours max.”

You think about it for a moment, rolling your lips between your teeth. Honestly, you don’t want to come in on your day off—who wants to work when they don’t have to—but three hours doesn’t sound so bad.

“Just three hours?”

Soyoung nods. “Just three hours. I’ll be helping with the dinner too, so we’ll get to work together. And afterwards, we can go to a party, if you want.”

That piques your interest, even though you aren’t one to go out often. “What party?”

“There’s a few houses on this property—they’re rented out to people who want to stay at the country club for an extended amount of time. And I heard from some of the other employees that a party is being hosted at one of the houses. Anyone and everyone is invited—even us.”

For some reason, you actually want to go to this party. Why? Maybe you just want to forget about Jung Hoseok’s charismatic smirk. A party should be a good distraction. So, you tell Soyoung that you’ll come work tomorrow and attend the party with her.

And the girl gives you hug, promising that it’ll be loads of fun.

You hope she’s right.

***

The next night, you arrive to work in a different version of your uniform. Instead of the usual polo and shorts the country club has you normally donned in, you’re wearing a long sleeve button up and black slacks. In your bag, you brought a change of clothes for later. Thankfully, you remembered to grab it on your way out. Imagine having to wear your server uniform to a party.

That would’ve been a social suicide.

You meet up with Soyoung for a few minutes before the dinner staff collects you all together. They debrief about tonight’s expectations and everyone’s roles. Next, they list all the jobs and when they call your name, you find out you’re going to be taking orders.

“Do I also need to bring the food out?” you ask.

One of the leaders shakes their head. “No, we’ll have people specifically there for that.”

After all the roles are established, dinner officially begins and you try not to look dumbstruck when you walk into the formal dining hall. This is the first time you’ve been in this room and it’s absolutely magnificent. You continue staring around for a moment before walking towards your section of the room—a row of tables by the window overlooking the setting sun.

You proceed taking orders from the first table—a family of four—and then the next—a group of six—before walking to a table that only seats two people. Probably a date. You barely look at the couple as you push a strand of loose hair behind your ear and pull out the notepad.

“Can I take your orders?” you ask, click your pen.

“Yes,” says a nasally voice to your right. You follow it, meeting the profile of a gorgeous girl. Long, silky hair drapes down her back in waterfalls and she’s wearing a tight pink dress. You think that she’ll turn her attention to you, but she doesn’t; she keeps staring at her date. “I’ll have the ratatouille. What about you, Hobi?”

Hobi? “I told you not to call me that, Nina.”

She pouts. “But you let me call you that when we were kids.”

“Yeah, we were kids then.”

You spare a look at Nina’s date and nearly falter when you realize who this Hobi is. It’s none other than Jung Hoseok himself. He’s wearing a fitted charcoal suit, hair slicked back slightly. Even from this view, you can tell his suit is expensive; definitely imported and tailored fitted to his body. Still, you can feel yourself salivating. The man looks like absolute sin, and you feel a sudden flash of jealousy because he’s on a date with someone else—someone he seems to know pretty well.

But you realize you have no right to feel that emotion at all. He’s not yours to have. You both just happen to be sexually compatible. That is all. You two never talked about being exclusive. He is allowed to see other girls, even though the thought makes you feel a little sick.

Hoseok brings his eyes to yours, flashing you a smirk that has your knees weak. “Y/n.”

“You two know each other?” Nina asks, but your eyes don’t move from his.

“A little,” he says. That’s an understatement.

“We just went to high school together,” you add, playing along with his little game. “We weren’t friends though, just happened to be in a few classes together.”

Hoseok feigns hurt, bringing a hand up to his chest. “Can’t believe you think so little of me.”

“Oh, Hobi,” Nina interjects, her hand finding his on top of the table. You zone in on the touch, blood pressure rising when you realize he hasn’t pushed her away.

You try not to roll your eyes. “Yes, poor Hobi.”

When you turn back to him, he’s already looking at you. You stiffen for a second, wondering if his eyes have been on you this whole time. And by the scathing sensation you feel on the side of your head—Nina’s eyes, no doubt—you realize he probably has. “Um. Anyway, what did you want?”

He smirks again. “I’ll have the same, y/n.”

You quickly jot it down and excuse yourself before you start thinking too much.

The rest of your short shift, you make sure not to walk by Hoseok’s table again. Whenever you’re around him, you can’t think properly. He always seems to cloud your best judgment, which is why you’ve already been fucking him this summer. You allow work to consume you, which makes the time fly by. Before you know it, the three hours is already up and you’re headed to the bathroom with Soyoung.

“See? Wasn’t that bad, huh?” she asks from the cubicle beside you.

It was terrible. “Could’ve been worse, I guess.”

“I’m so excited about the party,” Soyoung changes the conversation. “It’s been so long since I’ve had a night out.”

You can’t help the next words that bubble out of you. “Why do you overwork yourself?”

Honestly, you didn’t mean to ask. After all, it isn’t your business to ask such questions anyway. Sure, you were curious about Soyoung but it’s not your place. You’ve been really testing boundaries recently.

“It just kind of happens,” she answers, which shocks you. Not the answer itself, but the fact that she even answered you at all. “I’ve been working here for so long, I guess I just can’t help it.”

“Well,” you sigh, “don’t overwork yourself. Live a little, you know.”

Soyoung laughs. “I’ll try.”

You step out of the stall first, moving to stand in front of the full-length mirror. Tonight, you opted for a flowy crop top and tight skirt. Not something you’d usually wear, but tonight’s different than most nights—you want to enjoy yourself. You pull your hair out of its tight pony, humming in pleasure at the sensation of your hair being free.

“Okay, I see you with the sexy hair.”

You didn’t even hear Soyoung’s stall unlocking or opening. Turning in her direction, you see she’s wearing something similar to you. Only, both her top and skirt are flowy. “More like messy hair.”

She laughs. “It looks good still.”

After running a hand through your hair a few times, and fixing your makeup, the two of you throw your bags into your respective vehicles and walk across the country club’s property. Not even five minutes later, you can hear music playing. Across the distance, you can see a massive house—no, villa—lit up with lights and people all over the place.

“Woah,” you breathe.

“Right?” Soyoung chuckles. “I told you this party was going to be it.”

“I thought you said it was going to be a house party.”

“It is?” She seems confused.

You shake your head. “Are all the houses on the country club property this big?”

Even in the dim lighting, you can see her nod. “I think so. Maybe not this big, but they’re all large enough to house multiple people.”

Damn. You wonder who’s renting this place for the summer. It’s huge, so there must be more than one person; maybe a family? Though, that seems odd since a party filled with young people is happening right now. However, you can’t even begin to fathom how much it costs to rent. How can anyone actually afford that?

But all thoughts of money fade when you actually reach the villa. You assume there’s mainly college-aged people here, though it’s difficult to tell age these days. Soyoung leads the way as you two maneuver past groups of people and into the villa itself. Once inside, you have to force yourself not to gawk at everything.

Grand doesn’t even begin to describe the interior. There’s so much to look at and before you can even begin to look at everything, Soyoung pulls you away. She finds the kitchen and hands you a drink from the cooler. You remove the lid and begin sipping, tasting the slight bitterness of alcohol on your tongue.

“So what do we do now?” You’re acting like such a noob.

Soyoung slants a look at you. “We mingle, maybe dance a little. Do you like dancing?”

You bite the inside of your lip. “Umm, kind of?”

Of course, you’ve been to your fair share of college parties—where dancing and drinking do not mix well. But you don’t mind it; you just don’t think you’re very good. You voice this thought out loud and Soyoung rolls her eyes.

“You don’t have to be good at dancing. You just have to do it. Usually, it comes naturally.”

You aren’t too sure about that statement. But as Soyoung pulls you in a new direction, away from the kitchen, you realize that you have no choice. In another large room adjacent to the kitchen, someone has started a makeshift dancefloor. The bass is booming against the wall and strobe lights illuminate the room.

Even though you’re struggling, Soyoung pulls you both into the middle of the room and spins you around to the music. “I can’t.”

“Sure you can,” she shouts over the music, proceeding to move her body dramatically. You can’t help but laugh. Shaking your head, you realize dancing really isn’t a big deal and you allow Soyoung to move you to the beat. And eventually, you can do it by yourself.

You close your eyes as you sway to the music, occasionally bumping into Soyoung on purpose. It even gets to the point where you feel comfortable enough to lift your arms into the air, which is something you’d never thought you’d do.

It’s not until a few songs later that you finally open your eyes. And when you do, you immediately meet his gaze.

A jolt of electricity goes up your spine at the look Jung Hoseok is giving you right now. He’s leaning against the fireplace in the room across from you, changed out of that expensive suit he was wearing earlier. Now, he’s only wearing the white button up—sleeves rolled to his elbows—and a pair of navy-blue shorts. In his hand he nurses a beer, and that’s when you realize he’s still with that girl from earlier.

You try to keep your expression neutral as you stare at them; but by the way Hoseok’s hard gaze morphs into something smugger, you know you’re doing a bad job at concealing your feelings.

Dammit.

You quickly whisper something to Soyoung about needing some air as you look for the nearest exit. Unfortunately, you don’t know your way around the house. You meander around for a moment before you find a door that leads to the backyard. Breathing a sigh of relief, you open the door and walk into the cool summer night.

There’s a pathway of rocks that leads to the dock of a body of water—a body of water that you didn’t even know existed. You aren’t sure what to call it; a large pond? Whatever it is, you take the pathway until you reach the end of the dock. There, you settle on the edge and stare at the murky depths.

Bodies of water like this were unpredictable. You had no idea how deep it actually was. It could seem shallow, but in actuality be sixty feet deep. For a second, you consider dipping your toes in; however, you decide against it. Who knows what’s in there?

You allow the echoes of cicadas and other small insects to fill your senses. Eventually, you even lay down on the dock and close your eyes, trying not to think too much about—

“What are you doing?”

Your eyes flash open. And as they adjust to the night, you make out Hoseok’s infuriating perfect face. He’s leaning over you, and it pisses you off that he looks good even from this obscene angle. “Go away.”

“Well, aren’t you grumpy,” he hums. “It seemed like you were having a great time shaking you’re a—”

“Hoseok,” you breathe. “Leave me alone. I don’t want to play your stupid games right now.”

He cracks a rare half-smile. “Who said anything about playing games?”

When you don’t answer him, Hoseok’s smile falls and he frowns. You don’t care what else he has to say; you really meant it when you said you’re not in the mood for him right now. However, the boy doesn’t seem to take the hint like he usually does. Because he settles right beside you on the dock, laying down so he’s now eye-level with you.

“You’re insufferable,” you roll your eyes, shifting away from him.

“That’s what you like about me.”

“Who said I liked you?”

“I think your actions speak louder than you think,” he says, sounding awfully calm right now, which is very unlike him. You have no other choice but to look at him. And when you do, your breath gets caught in your throat. Even in the darkness, his eyes seem to sparkle as he looks at you—so fucking intently like he’s seeing you for the first time.

You don’t like it.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you force your eyes away, but his stare burns your skin anyway.

“You were jealous at dinner, weren’t you?”

The scoff that leaves your lips sounds beyond bitter. “No, of course not. Why would I be?”

“If you were jealous,” Hoseok begins, which makes your stomach churn, “don’t be.”

“Huh?” you ask, still not able to look at him.

“Don’t be,” he repeats. “Don’t be jealous of Nina.”

“I wasn’t jealous of—”

He cuts you off. “Don’t be jealous of her. She’s just a family friend.”

“But you two seem so close…”

Hoseok laughs. “I just entertain her because our parents have been friends forever. I’m pretty sure they want me to marry someone like her. I mean, she’s hot”—you suck in a breath— “but she’s not you.”

Your eyes finally give him and meet his, and he’s still staring at you. “What’s that supposed to mean.”

As you both look at each other, you expect him to say something. But he never does. Instead, he scoots a few inches closer to you—so close your noses are almost touching—and runs his fingers through your hair. Weaving his digits through your still messy hair, he pulls your head towards his and your lips meet.

And underneath the moonlight, you allow Hoseok to kiss you until your head is dizzy and you have no choice but to let him consume you again.

***

The next morning, you find yourself wrapped in pristine white sheets that feel like silk beneath your fingers. But that’s not the only thing you’re wrapped in. A heavy arm is slumped over your waist and the body heat emanating from him sets yourself ablaze.

Last night, after Hoseok bruised your mouth and skin with his lips at the dock, you asked him why he was at the party.

“This is my house,” he said so casually, like it wasn’t a big deal at all. Your eyes bulged out of their sockets. “Well, my house for the summer at least.”

“You’ve been here this whole time?”

He nodded. “Our actual house is in the city, and I hate driving back and forth so much—especially since I’m here with the guys nearly every day. So, my parents decided to rent this.”

You didn’t know what to say. But you realized there was nothing that needed to be said because since this is where he was staying, it meant his bedroom was here too. You let him walk you back to the villa and up the stairs into his room, to which you had to text Soyoung and let her know you were headed home early. A lie. You told her you felt sick. Another lie. But she didn’t seem to mind. She had found a few other employees of the country club there and would walk back with them.

After losing track of how many orgasms he gave you, youth both shared a bottle of vodka he had stashed underneath his bed. And tipsy you had no inhibitions.

Every question Hoseok asked, you answered honestly.

“Favorite color?”

“Red.”

“Do you like working at the country club?”

“It’s a job.”

“If you could do anything in the world, what would it be?”

“Spend my life away on some island.”

He laughed. “Really?”

“Island life s-seems fun. It’s relaxing. You don’t have to worry about anything,” you slightly slurred your words. “You?”

“I think island life seems to be the move now.”

You both talked so much. About anything and everything. It reminded you so much of the first time you really spoke to him. Moments like this made Hoseok feel normal, which you don’t know how to feel about yet.

But one thing you realized you did enjoy was his laugh—his real laugh. Not the one he smirked with, but the one he gave when he thought no one else was watching.

You must’ve said something stupid—you honestly can’t recall it now—but when he doubled over in laughter, it was infectious.

The good thing is that you don’t have work today, which means you don’t have to rush anywhere. But you have a feeling that you’ve overstayed your welcome. You didn’t even mean to stay the night, but you’d been so comfortable in Hoseok’s bed that you fell asleep after all the conversations. It was probably the best sleep you’ve ever had.

You’re going to give the credit to Hoseok’s expensive mattress, and definitely not him.

Though, you can’t deny how good it feels to have him spooning you. A part of you wants to stay in this bed forever, but that’s crazy talk—you shouldn’t have come into the bed with him at all. You keep telling yourself—over and over again—that you don’t want to fuck him again.

But you’ve been such a liar.

Now, you’ve accepted the fact that you can’t resist him. You know it’s just sex, but you didn’t want to get involved with him in the first place.

You take in a few breaths as you try to move his arm off of you. Hoseok shifts a little, and you risk a look over your shoulder. When your eyes take in his face, your heart stutters for a moment. With his mouth slightly parted and eyes still firmly closed, you realize that he looks so peaceful asleep. So vulnerable. You have to force yourself from touching him.

What the fuck, y/n?

Turning back around, you gently pry his arm off of you and pray that you don’t wake him. But all your careful maneuvering proves to be futile because his arm releases from your grip and moves back down to your waist. With a squeal, Hoseok pulls you back on his chest.

“Where do you think you’re going?” God, his morning voice is so hot.

“Um, leaving?” you sound like an idiot.

“Stay,” he breathes against the back of your head.

You want to. You really, really want to. “I can’t.”

“Why not?” he asks, snaking his arms underneath the covers to find you—skin still bare from last night’s activities. Your breath hitches as his fingers trail across your skin, each touch feeling like sparks.

“I-I have somewhere I have to be,” you stutter as his rough hand wraps around one of your breasts, squeezing tight. Your nipple hardens immediately.

Hoseok slips the covers off your body, exposing you to the cool air-conditioned room. And without warning, he moves on top of you and begins trailing his lips over your body. You notice that he makes sure to suck those bruises he left scattered across your skin extra hard, purpling them even more.

“Hoseok,” you try not to moan. “I really have t-to—”

His lips crashing onto yours shuts you up. You kiss him back forcefully, nipping his lips with your teeth and running your tongue across his. As you two battle it out, he settles in-between your thighs. Bringing a hand down your abdomen, it slides straight to your cunt—which is already drenched.

He hisses against your lips. “So fucking wet. Thought you had to go?”

“Shut up,” you moan as he runs a finger from your ass to your clit, swirling your juices everywhere. Involuntarily, your hips buck up when he slides a finger inside of you. He gently fucks you like that for a moment, leaving you writhing underneath him. “More, Hoseok—I need more.”

A wicked smile erupts on his face. “Are you going to beg for it?”

An incredulous expression lights your face. You’ve never begged in bed before, and you aren’t going to start now. However, the man on top of you is sure getting a kick out of this. Hoseok moves his finger slowly out of you, which agitates you to no end. If you weren’t so horny right now, you’d kill him.

“No,” you narrow your eyes, not willing to give in.

His finger stops moving. “A shame, really.”

You freeze. “What the fuck, Jung Hoseok?”

“I’m not doing anything until you say please,” he smirks, moving his upper body away from you.

Even though you’re pissed, you can’t help but drink in the Adonis in front of you. Like you, Hoseok is completely naked. Your eyes rake his defined muscles and his thick cock that’s already unbelievably hard. He’s hard for you. The fact that you turn him on makes you feel good—too good.

“Fine,” you shrug, and his smirk falls. “Just get blue balls then.”

As his body goes slack for a moment, you use the opportunity to slip from the bed. But you don’t manage to get very far at all. You probably only take three steps before his arm wraps around you and pulls you back to the bed.

You fall on your back, and Hoseok pins your arms on either side to keep you from moving. Still, you squirm—heart drumming in your chest at the look on his face. His eyes have turned black, and he looks like he wants to devour you. “I’m not begging.”

“We’ll see about that.”

With your arms still pinned, Hoseok lowers his body and your legs spread on their own accord. Fuck you, body. The movement makes him chuckle darkly and he begins peppering kisses along your thigh. Your breath hitches in your throat, which turns into a gasp when he suddenly bites down on your flesh. Not hard enough to draw blood, but it’s enough to be painful.

And as much as you hate to admit it, you like it very much.

Hoseok continues alternating between kissing and biting your thighs until you’re one-hundred-percent positive there is a pool of your wetness on the bed. You know what he’s trying to do and it’s working, but you don’t want to give in. And then he’s so close to your pussy, not even an inch away. You can feel his breath fanning you there. If you just move your hips a little…

“Don’t even think about it,” he moves his head away.

You release a groan of frustration. “Oh my god.”

“If you just say the magic word,” he taunts, lips now on your stomach. He moves low, but never low enough; never where you want him to go.

When he moves up your body, pressing chaste kisses on your nipples before latching his lips on your neck, you release a breathy moan. Hoseok lets out a groan from the back of his throat, hands tightening around your wrists. Fuck, why are the noises he makes even attractive? “Hoseok…”

“Y/n,” he’s still sucking on your neck.

This position, you realize, aligns him perfectly with your body. Again, if you were able to move just a little bit…but Hoseok’s weighing you down with his body, not allowing you to move at all.

“Hoseok,” you say his name again, but he doesn’t respond—he just moves his lips to your ear, nibbling on the sensitive flesh there. And that’s when you crumble. You can’t take it anymore. “Please…please just fuck me already.”

Simultaneously, he curses into your ear as he slides his cock into you. Too perfect—the way he fills you up is too perfect.

You expect Hoseok to fuck you hard, hips slamming into you, but he doesn’t. His thrusts are slow, but the way he hits your cervix has you nearly in tears. Fuck. He releases the hold on your wrists to grip onto either side of your face. With lips ghosting over yours, you tangle your hands into his dark hair.

Your breaths mesh together as he continues to fuck you with slow, measured thrusts. You’ve grown accustomed to the rough way Hoseok likes to fuck; but for some reason, you love this so much more. It’s intimate and makes your chest tighten in a strange way but feels so good you don’t want it to stop.

“Please,” you whisper against his lips again.

“Fuck, sweetheart,” he groans, rolling his hips in a way that has you arching off the bed. Yes.

“Just like t-that,” you say, slanting your mouth to mold against his again.

Your orgasm comes without warning; you moan into Hoseok’s mouth, gripping him closer to you and you ride your high. Through the haze of your earth-shattering orgasm, you hear Hoseok ask if he can come inside you. He’s always pulled out—even last night when he fucked you for hours. But right now you don’t care, and your answer comes in the form of your legs wrapping around his hips.

He kisses you hard and comes inside you a moment later. You’ve never let anyone else come raw inside of you; never trusted anyone else that much. And in that moment, a terrifying thought flashes across your mind.

I’m in love you.

The thought comes so suddenly, burns your brain so hotly, your body stills. Hoseok finally lifts off of you, eyes crinkling in concern. “You okay?”

You quickly try to shake the feeling away. “Um, yeah.”

“You sure? Should I not have come inside you?” he slips out of you, and for some reason you want to cry at the sudden emptiness you feel. “You’re looking pale right now.”

“No, it was fine,” you blink too fast, feeling tears begin to well in your eyes. Get a fucking grip on yourself. “I’m sorry, I really have to go.”

Hoseok doesn’t try to stop you this time when you move away from the bed. You find your clothes on the floor and slip everything back on without looking at him, even though you can feel his gaze on you the entire time. Not bothering to check your appearance, you grab your stuff and move towards his door.

“Y/n,” he calls your name, voice sounding strange, but you don’t want to look at him. If you look at him, you’re going to start crying. And that’s too embarrassing to explain.

You slip out of his bedroom and take the stairs two at a time. As you rush down, you run into someone. “Sorry—”

Looking up, you realize it’s Seokjin; he must’ve stayed the night. Even in your distress, you feel feverish wondering if you were too loud. However, he takes one look at you and stares like he has you all figured out. Your heart threatens to beat out of your chest.

“Did something happen…?” he asks, looking at the door you just left wide open upstairs.

“Don’t worry about it,” you quickly say, adverting your eyes and sidestepping him.

This morning, it’s much easier to find the front door. Just as you’re about to slip out, you hear your name being called again, heavy steps thundering down the stairs. Shit, shit, shit. You break into a run and don’t stop until you have no more air to spare in your lungs. Thankfully, you’re far enough from the villa and close to the country club.

Only then do you allow yourself to fall into the grass as the tears finally cascade down your cheeks.

You’re a fool, you realize. A fool to have fallen in love with someone like Jung Hoseok. Someone who will never feel the same way. Someone who just uses you for a good time. someone who you barely even know. Someone you never wanted to get involved with.

***

You call out of work the next week, claiming to have the stomach bug. But you don’t have the stomach bug; in fact, you’re not even physically ill at all. You just can’t bear the thought of running into Hoseok at the country club.

On the first day, you listen to your sad girl hours playlist on repeat.

During your second day of moping in bed, you half consider quitting your job. Would it be too cowardly? Maybe. Unfortunately, there’s only a few weeks left of summer and you doubt that you’ll be able to find another job.

When the third day arrives, you finally get out of bed and take a proper shower. You didn’t realize how much you needed it.

Your mom knocks on your door on the fourth day. You only know it’s her by the way she taps on your door rhythmically; she’s always done that ever since you were a child. When you don’t respond, she dares to crack the door open. Shit, you forgot to lock it last night.

“Are you feeling better, love?”

You don’t move on the bed, hoping your mother thinks you’re asleep or something. But despite you not moving, she still shuffles into your room and settles herself on the edge of the bed.

“Is this because I haven’t been spending time with you this summer?”

No, mom. It’s me. I fucked up. Although, I would appreciate it if you did spend time with me—like you dragged me here this summer to do.

“I’m really sorry, love,” she whispers, getting up after a moment.

Once you’re sure she’s by the door, you finally open your mouth. “It’s not because of you. It’s…something else.”

You hear her grab onto the door, but she doesn’t say another word before leaving you all alone again.

On the fifth day, the bruises that littered your skin finally start fading. Glancing into the mirror of your bathroom, you run your fingers along the—now greenish-yellow—hickies he left on your neck. Goodness, there were so many. And annoyingly enough, you can still feel exactly where he had touched you—like his hands are still there right now.

Pulling your t-shirt down, you see more evidence of Hoseok’s assault on your chest. You have to stop yourself from looking at the rest of your body.

The sixth day you, finally, spend time pondering that terrifying thought you had about Hoseok. Are you actually in love with him? Do you even know what love feels like? What even is love? You’ve always been an overthinker, and these questions only make your head spin more. But after hours and hours of teetering the files of your brain, you do know one thing.

You like him.

You like Hoseok a lot.

It might not be love—perhaps that had been your sex-brain talking—but you were definitely starting to fall for him. You don’t know when or where the change happened, or maybe you’ve always liked him, but it feels good to finally admit the truth to yourself.

Now, the real challenge was if you would tell him.

Would it be worth it?

***

“Y/n, I seriously thought you’d quit!”

Soyoung is the first person you run into on your first day back. You just thank god it’s her and not someone else. You flash her a quick smile and greeting. “Hey.”

“What happened to you?” she asks, walking beside you down the hall.

“Stomach bug,” the lie passes surprisingly easily through your lips. Good thing you had enough time to practice saying those words out loud.

Soyoung makes a face. “That must’ve been awful, but I’m glad you’re well enough to be here.”

“Yeah, totally.”

She leaves you at the golf cart and you get into the seat with a sigh. Over the month and whatever weeks you’ve been here, driving the cart now feels like second nature. You no longer bump into displays or people.

As you drive around the green, you make a stop at every hole and offer the players drinks. At the beginning of summer, you’d been a little apprehensive about this job. However, it turns out, working as the drink cart girl isn’t half bad. The tips you make are worth being out in the scorching summer sun.

Towards the end of your round, you feel your nerves twist. You’re relieved that you haven’t seen Hoseok; then again, a part of you is worried. Why isn’t he here? He’s always here. Every single time you’ve driven on the range, he’s been here.

Where is he today?

Soon, you realize that you didn’t need to worry at all.

At the last hole, you see him—well, them. Hoseok, Seokjin, Namjoon, and Jeongguk are together, like they always seem to be. Inseparable. For a second, you think about skipping them, but then you overhear their conversation.

“Damn, Hoseok,” Jeongguk whistles, leaning against his club, “this is the worst game you’ve ever played.”

“He played worse than Namjoon,” Seokjin snickers.

Namjoon narrows his eyes. “I’m not that bad.”

“You lack coordination,” Seokjin explains to his friend, as if that was supposed to make the burn better. “And Hoseok usually always wins.”

“Now that I’m thinking about it, he hasn’t played well all week,” Jeongguk twists his lips.

“Dude probably hasn’t had ass in a week,” Namjoon comments.

“I’m right fucking here, assholes.”

You finally allow your eyes to settle on the man of the hour. Like his friends have suggested, he does seem off today. Normally, the Jung Hoseok you know is easy going, laid back. He’s usually cocky and charismatic. Every time you’ve seen him play golf, he’s amazing. He always swings with blind sureness—like he knows the ball will hit green. But the man you’re looking at right now is beyond tense and agitated.

“You’re no fun today,” Jeongguk pouts.

“He hasn’t been fun all week,” Seokjin rolls his eyes. “Not since the house party.”

Your hands stiffen on wheel. Hoseok’s been in a mood for a whole week? You try to find the answer to your own question in his eyes, but he hasn’t looked in your direction yet. In fact, none of them seem to realize you’re close. They all seem to be thrown off their usual balance. That obvious fact makes you realize you should probably just skip them. But as you lift your foot to press the gas pedal, Seokjin notices you.

Damn. Why is he always the first one to see you?

His eyes widen at your appearance. “Just the girl I was thinking about.”

That statement draws everyone else from their stupor and towards you. You watch as Jeongguk and Namjoon’s eyes also widen, but the only pairs of eyes you really care about right now can’t even meet yours. Hoseok shoots you a glance before twisting away, jaw hardened. Ouch. You feel a pang in your chest.

For some reason, his dismissal hurts more than anything else right now.

“Glad you finally arrived,” Seokjin continues talking, walking closer to you. “I was wondering when you’d come.”

It was weird to have Seokjin speak so much to you. The only person you ever really spoke to was Hoseok, but it seems like he’s the last person who wants to talk to you right now. Maybe coming into work was a bad idea.

“I think you should talk to him,” he says, and it was your turn to have wide eyes.

“I don’t know…” What could you even say to him? You don’t know where to begin because you don’t know what kind of relationship you have with Hoseok. Did you want a relationship with him? Did he even feel the same way?

“He’s been a fucking wreck all week because of you, you know?”

Your chest hurts. “Really?”

Seokjin nods. “I mean, the guy’s always a pain in the ass…” he rolls his eyes, “but it’s worse now.”

Maybe you hadn’t been the only one suffering this past week. As horrible as it sounds, the thought makes you feel…hopeful.

“We’ll take your cart back and cover for you, if you want.”

You stare at Seokjin and find yourself nodding. “Okay.”

He calls Jeongguk and Namjoon over, asking you to get out of the cart. “Don’t worry—we won’t steal your money.”

It’s a joke. You know it’s a joke. Still, you can’t help the next that slip past your lips unconsciously. “Like you all need it.”

The three of them laugh at you as they pile into the cart. Before you can say anything else, they drive off—leaving you alone with the one person you’re most nervous to speak to. He’s still turned away from you, staring off into the distance. You will your heart to stop racing as you wipe your sweaty hands on the back of your shorts.

Calm down.

You take a deep breath before you decide it’s now or never. Deciding it is time, you take the tentative steps towards Hoseok and run a million different scenarios in your head. What’s the worst thing that can happen? He tells you to fuck off and never speak to him again?

Nausea settles into your throat at the idea.

By the time you run another worst-case-scenario into your head, you’re just a few steps behind him. Closer to him now, you feel like you’re going to burst at the seams. You stare at his disheveled hair—like he’s been running a hand through it all day—and stiff body. Despite his rigid posture, he’s still the most handsome person you’ve ever seen.

You don’t know long you stand there and stare at Hoseok, but you don’t jolt out of your daze until you hear his voice.

“Are you just going to stare at me all day?”

“Oh, you’re—I mean, I—” you fumble with your words, nervously twitching your hands. “I wasn’t sure if you wanted to talk.”

“It’s kind of hard to talk to someone who doesn’t even like me,” he says, finally turning to face you.

What? “Hoseok—”

“I know you hate me, so I won’t bother you again, if that’s what you wanted to talk about,” his voice is detached, and you realize you’ve never seen this side of him before. No wonder his friends were fed up with him. You would’ve been too. “Sorry if I annoyed you this summer.”

Without another word, he begins to walk away from you. What the hell is going on? You shake your head as you march up to him and grab onto his shirt. “Stop.”

“Y/n…”

“Hoseok, shut up!” You bring your eyes up to glare at him. “Just—just let me talk first, okay?”

His eyes are still cold, but you can see a bit of softness pool in them. “Fine.”

“You’re an idiot,” you breathe, dropping your fist and feeling something prick your vision. “I-I don’t hate you…I don’t hate you at all. And I don’t want you to stop bothering me. Yes, you’re annoying”—you feel him take a step away— “but I like it. I like you. I like you a lot, Hoseok. So much…I don’t even know—”

He stops your rambling with his lips. The kiss makes your heart soar and ache all at once because it feels so damn good—Hoseok feels so damn good. But it ends all too soon when he pulls away.

“I like you too.”

“Then why are you being so mean to me?” You feel an onslaught of tears flow down your cheeks.

Hoseok wipes a tear away with his thumb. “Because I thought you hated me.”

“Well, I don’t,” you sniffle.

“Then, why’d you leave?”

You know he’s talking about that morning. Do you tell him the truth? “Because I thought I was in love with you.”

“Love?” he chokes, and you feel a blush heat your face. “What made you think that?”

“Uh…it was just a sudden thought,” you awkwardly scratch the side of your face. “But I thought about it, and it’s not love…at least, not yet.”

You say that last part so quietly, you don’t think Hoseok even heard. However, the way his eyes gloss over for a moment lets you know that he did. You’re even more embarrassed now. You try to cover your face, but he grabs both of your hands before you can.

“Let’s take this one step at a time, yeah?” Look at him being the rational one here.

You nod, agreeing with him. “So, we like each other.”

“We do,” he says, suddenly pulling you closer to him. Your body hums being so close to him. Being close like this, you’re able to wrap your arms around him and does the same—hand moving to the back of your neck to tilt your head back. At this angle, you’re exposed to him.

“So, what are we?” you dared to ask the question.

Hoseok ghosts his lips over you. “I don’t like sharing.”

Butterflies erupt in your stomach. “I haven’t been with anyone else this summer.”

It’s the truth. You haven’t even looked twice at anyone else. You haven’t desired anyone else. You don’t think you ever can again. Jung Hoseok has ruined you.

“Me either.”

“You and Nina—”

“We’re just family friends, remember?” he cuts you off.

“She clearly likes you.”

“Well, she’s not you. I’ve told you that before.”

He did. And, for some reason, you believed him.

“So, what are we?” you ask again, looking up at Hoseok to gauge what he’s going to say. He stares down at you for a moment before that smirk you know all too well graces his lips. As irritating as it is, you’ve missed it.

“We’re dating,” his eyes sparkle, before dimming a little. “If you’ll have me.”

Warmth pools in your stomach as you nod. “There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”

[svucarisiaddict]

Hello, how are you? I hope you have been well.

So I saw these prompts that kind of stood out to me and I was thinking about them in reference to one night stand series;

“I’ve never felt like this about anyone, and honestly it scares me.”

"I never stood a chance, did I?” “That’s the sad part – you did once.”

"You were more then a one night stand". 

but idk, I just liked them for some reason. Not sure if they work but I thought I'd send them over and get your thoughts?!?!

I don't just see her listening to Sonny and going okay then happy ever after but I also don't know if she is really willing to stop with him either. I'm probably reading to much into this but what do you think?!? When your write a series such as this one was there a thought on how it will go or is it something when you start writing?

I know it sounds silly, I just like the reader. She's flawed with her putting up the walls, arguably self destructive and going back to Stone who seems to be that safe, familiar relationship even if it's not the best (ex for a reason). I love that despite her feelings for Sonny she isn't hanging around to wait to get hurt or even be anyone's second choice.

But Sonny here, I guess the choice has gone because she has, but honestly he's pined, had feelings for, had this close relationship with Rollins for ever that we know. But he had this chance right with someone else. And look what happens!

I'm so invested and like alot of your fics I have been going back and re reading..... Im sorry I'm rambling with no real questions at 4 in the morning my time.

Ps. Okay John Carter, yasss. Such a mood and I love him. I was quite young when ER was on but my mum got me into the re-runs much later and he was def my fav! So excited to hear your writing for him.

First, let me say thank you for sending me your ask. I love when people ask me questions about my series! You really seem to get my writing and the characters :)

The prompts are perfect for the series. So, thank you! In fact I used one in the most recent chapter of the series!

She is definitely not over Sonny nor will she just accept his explanation of his feelings for Amanda. We all know Sonny has liked Amanda for years. Deep down he probably does. You are not reading into it at all! That’s exactly how I want the story to come across. 

As far as my writing I usually have a rough idea of how the story is going to play out but sometimes change on a whim. It may depend on how I’m feeling that day emotionally, not liking what I wrote and rewriting, getting a better idea, etc. And sometimes I just get stuck on where to take the story.  I’m releasing the next chapter later today and I am working on the next. And I’m stuck. I have a couple different ways to go.

You’re not silly. I like the character too. I try to write real characters. Everyone has flaws and I try to reflect that in my writings. I feel people can relate to a story or character if they see themselves in a similar situation to having the same feelings and reactions. 

Peter Stone is complicated. He is a broken man but he has the capability to love deeply. He truly cares for and loves our leading lady. I have a feeling he is going to fight for her and prove his love to her. Whether he’ll be successful is to be seen.

Don’t count Sonny out though! He cares for the reader as well. She’s made him realize that there is someone out there other than Amanda he can love. I do think he’s torn on what to do because now he thinks that the reader is over him and he lost his chance with her. 

I’m still uncertain who the reader will end up with, if anyone! We’ll see where the story takes us!

I’m so happy to hear how much you enjoy and are invested in my fics. I appreciate it so much! Please message me with any questions on my fics, my process, etc. 

I love Carter too. I was so naive and sweet when the show began. There were times when he irked me and I didn’t care for how he behaved. I have a middle story for him and the reader but need to work back to thow they meet. I have a couple of different scenarios but not sure if I like them. Stay tuned for Carter fics!

Thank you again so much!!