#it implies he's not immortal because he was a kid when he got adopted but he's not a hilichurl either

[sapphicjackal]

Bingyuan Soulmate au 3

Part 1 Part 2

Shen Yuan was overjoyed now that he had made contact with his Soulmate at last. Binghe was absolutely precious. The burst of his emotions written into his words were all so genuine and adoring. Once Binghe knew that they were soulmates, he all but bloomed into an adorable white lotus. The way he writes in a more formal and archaic dialect is charming, especially since it’s paired with the calligraphy brush he consistently uses. Shen Yuan finds his quirks overwhelmingly cute.

They had only known each other for two days, but Shen Yuan was working out something of a pattern for Binghe’s messages. He would wake up well before Shen Yuan, leaving a message on his wrist like Shen Yuan has done for years. Then Binghe will be busy for the rest of the day until late at night.

Maybe he works on a farm? 

Shen Yuan tried to picture an adorable (because there’s no way that Binghe isn’t the cutest thing in existence) child waking up with the sun to work on a farm. Shen Yuan doesn’t really know what work is done on a farm. It would probably be a lot of manual labor. Binghe’s too young to be working all day!

What if he’s one of those kids stuck in a sweatshop forced to do labor?

The thought of it breaks Shen Yuan’s heart, and fills him with protective fury.

His soulmate is a lot younger than him, so Shen Yuan has been trying to keep the conversation more shallow to protect his soulmate’s privacy and safety. However, he’s getting the feeling that Binghe isn’t in a great situation. 

Not knowing about soulmates indicates a level of isolation and deliberate ignorance. Being illiterate at 10 implies a level of disenfranchisement. The long hours that Binghe keeps where he’s too occupied to talk. Those emotions of fragile hope and loneliness that undercurrent some of his words.

Something is wrong, and Shen Yuan should address it sooner rather than later.

“Bing-er could you tell me where you live?” Shen Yuan writes during the afternoon, knowing Binghe will likely respond later that night. He keeps imparts emotions of curiosity, concern, and care, hoping Binghe will feel safe enough to tell him, even if they hadn’t known each other long.

He had to wait a few hours but finally he felt the tingle of a brush dragging across his skin. 

“This Binghe is a disciple of Cang Qiong Mountain’s Qing Jing Peak” Binghe wrote. Shen Yuan stared blankly at the words. He would doubt them, but he can feel the truth in the words. 

Soulmates can tell when the other is lying, because the communication is between two souls that are linked together. Soulmates can lie to each other verbally, but words written on skin can only be true to the soul, if they’re dishonest then your soulmate can tell.

Shen Yuan pulled up his phone and looked up Qing Jing Peak, not expecting anything to come up. He was surprised to get results. However the results were to a web page of a relatively new Web novel called <Proud Immortal Demon Way> which only has 4 published chapters.

Shen Yuan read the summary in disbelief, his eyes skimming over it before reading it over and over again to make sure he got it right. The main character’s name is Luo Binghe, named after the river that his washerwoman adoptive mother found him floating in after being abandoned in a basket on the coldest day of winter. 

Shen Yuan didn’t understand what was happening. He didn’t think that Binghe was lying, their bond would tell him. Why would Binghe introduce himself as a character in a web novel that had barely started and had practically no audience. It made no sense.

None of this makes sense.

Shen Yuan can feel the tingle of a brush on his arm, Binghe must be wondering why he was taking so long to reply. Shen Yuan decided to read <Proud Immortal Demon Way> tomorrow during the day while Binghe is busy. He wouldn’t ask any questions that could make Binghe think that he doubted him. Shen Yuan just knows that it would shatter Binghe’s heart.

“Yuan-ge?” Binghe had written, light impatience mixed with a hint of nervousness and hopeful anticipation.

Shen Yuan decides to just go along with whatever Binghe says. No need to contradict him.

“I’m not a part of any sect. How do you find Qing Jing Peak?” Shen Yuan asked.

This time it was Binghe who took a long time to respond.

“This one likes Qing Jing Peak. Qing Jing Peak does not like this Binghe.” Binghe says, his words carry with them the faintest amount of bitterness, with a stronger mixture of sorrow, pain, and loneliness. The words feel like a whispered confession, like a truth too terrible to speak aloud. It feels vulnerable and painful raw in its honesty.

Shen Yuan’s heart hurts with the words. He has gotten so used to Binghe’s overwhelming vibrance, it makes it all the more clear how achingly diminished he feels in those words. All the brewing heartache that’s being exposed.

Shen Yuan glances at the summary page for a web novel, seeing the tags that promise a revenge story and power fantasy. It’s exactly the type of web novel that Shen Yuan likes to read. He pushes away all of his confusion and doubts to focus on what’s important, Binghe.

“I don’t know how anyone could not like Luo Binghe.” Shen Yuan writes, soaking the words with protective anger and overflowing adoration. Binghe is a good boy. Binghe deserves the world. Shen Yuan has only had him for 3 days but if anything happened to Luo Binghe, Shen Yuan would kill everybody in the world and then himself. 

“Yuan-ge!” Binghe writes, joy tinged lightly with heartache.

Shen Yuan changed the subject to instead ask about what Binghe was learning. Binghe told him that Qing Jing Peak was a Peak of scholars and that he was meant to learn the 4 Arts. However he wasn’t allowed into the classes with the other disciples and he was told to do chores instead of cultivating. 

It filled Shen Yuan with indignation. 

“I don’t know if my education holds up to Qing Jing Peak standards, but I have been learning the Four Arts. I’ll teach you whatever I can.” Shen Yuan wrote. He began trying to think of the best ways to teach the subjects with limited space and an inability to actually demonstrate in person. It would be difficult, but written instruction could hopefully help Binghe in some way.

“Thank you Yuan-ge!” Binghe wrote enthusiastically, filled with anticipation and hope. His brush strokes were messier than usual with his giddiness. 

Shen Yuan smiled at his arm. He had been thinking about becoming a teacher after he found tutoring his meimei to be enjoyable. Maybe this could be like his test? He’ll take this seriously, only the best for his Binghe. 

That means that Shen Yuan will have to do deep research into the four arts to expand his knowledge, and also work on putting together lesson plans. He should also look into teaching methods. (Not to mention the fact that his soulmate might just be the protagonist of a xianxia novel, a fact he was studiously putting out of mind and out of sight, meaning he should also research cultivation type settings.)

The bottom line is that his soulmate needs help, and after 15 years of waiting, Shen Yuan is prepared to do anything for his soulmate.

Part 4

[servantserah]

Hello hello!

I wanted to say that i enjoyed your art all day yesterday instead of studying! Just scrolled through the ggAU and fell in love with the concepts. Still need to go back and put them in my queue.

One thing im curious about. You implied on the grown up art of the fellspawns (Eden and Toni to be exact) that they aren't the only ones. Do you meant that fellspawns are a species (?), or is it a name for Fran and Lilith's kids? And do you include Warlock in the fellspawns category or being an Antichrist is different?

Thank you, I'm glad you enjoy it! 💜

'Fellspawns' isn't a species, it’s just a nickname I use for Fran and Ash's children! It's a combination of 'hellspawn' and 'Fell', their family name. Their species would be 'cambion', which describes the offspring of a demon and a human.

But yes, Eden and Toni aren't the only children they have! I haven't shown the other ones yet because I'm still working out details about them but they are born when Eden and Toni have already moved out. Perks of being immortal, you can just have children whenever. (Francis is still a human but granted immortality after Armageddon. That's a VERY basic summary of the story lmao)

It's a bit complicated with Warlock. FrAsh practically raised him and he was never that close to his biological parents since they neglected him, so he and FrAsh do consider each other family. But not exactly in a parents/child kind of way. Maybe this is where the godparents aspect from canon comes in? He technially isn't a fellspawn, but no one would object if anyone called him one. Idk if that makes sense,,,, He never got adopted by FrAsh or anything btw, and he has always lived with his biological parents.

Warlock is a cambion, too, though!

[milfmacbeth]

Hi! Your top 5 best and top 5 worst endings of anything that you liked? Could be TV shows, books, movies, podcasts. Thanks!

hi!! thank you for the ask <3

i generally prefer tragic or bittersweet endings over unambiguously happy ones; this will be long; spoilers ahead (obviously)

best endings

hannibal

the wrath of the lamb fucking rearranged my brain chemistry. how do i explain to people that one of the most romantic things i’ve ever seen was a murder-suicide?

technically hannibal was canceled and not ended but in absence of a season 4, i will consider twotl the ending. i don’t even want a season 4 because i can’t imagine any better ending than the one we’ve got. yes, season 3b was a rushed mess of hannibal, will, and dolarhyde playing fuck marry kill with each other, but they stuck the landing so well, and it’s this perfect tragic mix of “this could’ve all been avoided” and “there’s no other way this could’ve ended”.

and yeah the ending is ambiguous and it’s implied they lived but my favorite interpretation is that they died in each other’s arms.

black sails

wars have been fought over the interpretation of this ending. i personally think john silver is lying but whatever your take, jack’s “a story is true, a story is untrue” speech is brilliant and it’s a perfect ending to a great show

fleabag

“i love you” “it’ll pass” I AM NORMAL. 

i love you, female characters written by women. i love you, comedy that turns into tragedy halfway through. i love you, clever use of narrative devices.

this show is damn near perfect, and even though the first thing i did after finishing fleabag was go on ao3 in search of thousands of words of fix-it fic, i wouldn’t change a thing about the ending. 

white fang

i wouldn’t say i have a favorite book, but if i had to answer that question it would either be the iliad or white fang. this is the book that got me into reading.

this book caught me at exactly the right time in my life. i was obsessed with wolves as a kid; i was 11 or so, and my grandma handed me this beautifully illustrated book that had the most amazing old book smell (because it’s been in a wooden attic up until then).

it’s about the life of a wolfdog (more wolf than dog) that was born in the wild but gets tamed/adopted into a dog pack that hates him because they can smell he’s not really a dog and hooo boy does something is wrong with you and others can tell that you’re not like them hit when you’re a lonely child.

anywayyyyyy it ends with white fang, having been adopted by a kind man, lying in the sun, still a little confused/out of his element but content. the ending is bittersweet and thematically fitting and he’s a good dog and deserves it.

the mechanisms

the mechanisms are a band of immortal space pirates telling stories of their adventures. their last album is titled death to the mechanisms and in the eponymous song , they realize they’re not quite as immortal as they thought they were. it’s sad, it’s funny, it’s beautiful, it’s poetic, and it’s a worthy send-off.

if you’ve got six and a half minutes, it’s worth a listen (even without context), if only for gems like “witnesses will say that they have never before seen someone so viciously excited to die” or “his body will float there forever, far beyond the warmth of stars” or “pointless, ignoble deaths the lot of them. but who that lived can really boast otherwise?” (this band is so quotable it's insane)

onto the hating!

worst endings

dexter

what the absolute FUCK was that. i adore this show but the ending sucks so much it feels almost malicious

supernatural

i’m not sure i can answer “do you like supernatural?” without a lawyer present. i was obsessed with supernatural as a teenager, then i stopped watching around season 10 or 11. i decided to rewatch the entire thing after november 5th. 

supernatural would be so good if it was good. i’m a “supernatural should’ve ended after season 5” truther but i admit that some of the later seasons do have their moments.

not the ending though. the ending is so completely beyond parody i don’t even know what to say. castiel is in superhell for gay angels. dean gets nailed by vampire clowns. when i first saw the aged-up version of sam i literally burst out laughing. at least the wincesties got a forehead touch out of it i guess???? i am so glad that i’ve built up enough emotional distance to laugh instead of rage about this because i know my teenage self would’ve had a conniption.

goethe’s faust and euripides’ orestes

they’ve got nothing to do with each other but i have the exact same beef with both of them so i’m just gonna throw them together. 

faust ending: faust loses his wager with mephisto and should’ve by all rights gone to hell but god says ????? (don’t even ask i’m not sure i could explain whatever twisted logic is going on there. something about faust using his devil-bestowed powers for good) and faust goes to heaven anyway.

goethe, my guy, you named the thing faust. eine tragödie. where’s the tragedy i was promised? false advertising. fuck you.

orestes ending: standoff between menelaus and orestes; orestes is holding a knife to hermione’s (menelaus’ and helen’s daughter) throat; this will not end well. or so you thought! at the last possible second, apollo swoops down and fixes everything, tells orestes to marry hermione and ???

nothing is satisfyingly resolved but hey, at least no one’s dead. except iphigenia, and agamemnon, and clytemnestra. this fucking family…

this is what the ancients called deus ex machina and what i call an ass pull.

i just think if you’ve constructed an entire narrative that follows a very clear, specific direction, you shouldn’t then swerve to the left. SEEMS LOGICAL TO ME

and it’s not just philistine bitching on my part btw. there’s actual academic debate about what the hell these authors were thinking. that being said, i’m a hater because i’m a lover, and i wouldn’t be so mad if i didn’t love both these plays

game of thrones

i am sure everyone has heard about how much the ending fucking sucks. from building up the night king to be a badass villain only to kill him in the ass-pulliest way imaginable in one (1) night, to walking back all the character development the characters went through to jon’s heritage being meaningless to having a thus far sympathetic dany snap and burn a city down over literally nothing to jaime and cersei being killed by falling rocks to brandon fucking stark, a character so uninteresting the show forgot about him for a whole season, sitting on the iron throne.

also, euron greyjoy is my favorite character in the books and i’ll never forgive the show for butchering him (i don’t know who the fuck that guy on the screen is, it sure ain’t euron).

one thing that i find fascinating is that it’s literally just the writing that sucks. the costumes are beautiful, the soundtrack is better than the show deserves (thank you ramin djawadi ilu mwah <3), the dragons look great, the actors are doing the best they can. highest production value piece of garbage ever made.

the magnus archives

(little warning bc i’m really mad about this so vitriol ahead. also, i have not listened to the magnus protocol and i’m not sure i ever will)

i yelled about this a lot and i’m ready to yell about this some more!! THIS IS A SEASON 5 HATE BLOG. i’m so serious it’s literally a better podcast if you ignore season 5 and act like MAG 160 is the ending.  jonathan ‘the archivist’ sims should’ve had a corruption arc and i will die on this hill, everything E V E R Y T H I N G pointed towards jon becoming a monster and enjoying it. it could’ve been so good!!! instead we got some formulaic bullshit, the concept of (and i cannot stress this enough) parallel universes introduced like three episodes before the ending, and the single shittiest romance i have ever been subjected to. the way martin treats jon is sooo fucking vile and yet the podcast is constantly like aren’t they so cute :) isn’t this soo romantic :) NO IT FUCKING ISN’T. he’s dating his shitty coworker who he doesn’t even like that much why exactly am i supposed to be rooting for this relationship jesus fuck i feel like i’m being gaslit. i don’t just have a notp i genuinely feel like jonmartin ruined the entire thing.

s5 also completely ignored jonah magnus who, apart from being one of the most interesting characters, is THE GUY THE PODCAST WAS NAMED AFTER. but yeah, sure, who cares about him? let's have five more episodes of jon and martin being fundamentally incompatible. 

and then there’s the ending where jon is the only one who stands up for what’s right. the podcast tries to act like keeping the fears in their world or releasing the fears are two equally bad choices but the latter is so clearly worse. so clearly the wrong choice to make. AND THEN THEY MAKE THAT TERRIBLE CHOICE FUCK THIS SO MUCH

tma season 5 is one of those cases where you can so clearly see the potential of something that could’ve been so great and they just threw that away AND FOR WHAT 

(ok i’m done yelling about this now. just kidding i’ll never be done)

[aragarna]

Coucou mon ami!

For the Character Ask Game 💚🤍🖤

Herny Morgan, Adam and Abe from Forever :D

Hello Old Valley! ;-)

All three?! LOL Okay, I'll try to make a collective, though I'm not sure I have a lot to say about Adam...

one aspect about them i love

I love that Henry, despite all he's been through, remains, at heart, a very compassionate person.

Abe, I love that he remains such a young man in his mind. Still behaving like a teenager with Maureen, or not afraid to try skateboard.

I don't think I like Adam very much, though I guess I did feel sympathy for him when he said he wouldn't do any harm to Abe because they were both survivors of the camps.

one aspect i wish more people understood about them

Not as much about what people understand or not, but I'd love to explore what it must feel for Henry to witness the world change the way it had in the past 200 years. Those have been pretty extraodinary years to live through (good or bad).

And I wonder what kind of lives Adam lived through those 2000 years...

one (or more) headcanon(s) i have about this character

I think Henry had children before - at least one child - and having to face their mortality, having to live with it with no escape for him, broke his heart and that is why he originally didn't want a kid of his own with Abigail.

Adopting Abe is different (though they've lived together as a family for so long now that Abe's death will break his heart and he knows it and he fears it). But still, adoption is different. Adoption he can do. It's just providing a good life for a lost kid that was already there.

Abe let his dad move back in because in his old age (Abe) he feels like he's become a father to Henry sometimes. Henry needs a sort of father figure, in the sense of someone to rely on, someone to take care of him when he's down. And Abe is that figure for him.

Adam? Hmm, I don't know. Nothing special beyond the fact that I took the pugio thing as him trying to save Caesar, like most people. And with this amazing trend of two, I assumed that immortality is linked to dying while trying to save a life (which also implies Adam used to be a good guy)

as well as

one character i love seeing them interact with

Henry and Abe are adorable together.

Adam is just fine where he is.

one character i wish they would interact with/interact with more

I really like the Henry-Hanson dynamic, but with a single season we haven't seen a lot of it. But I do enjoy how Hanson seemed to take Henry's deduction talent as a challenge. He goes from annoyed at that weird English guy to "Henry figured it out, did he?" to "yeah, I figured it too, genius."

one (or more) headcanon(s) i have that involve them and one other character

Abe found out his dad's weird condition by accident, at a relatively young age. Like maybe 7 or 8. And he just accepted it (as kids do at that age). So it's just been a normal thing to him all his life. He tried bragging about it a couple times at school (despite his parents repeatedly telling him to keep it a secret) but no one believed him, and he was mocked for it. Plus, when he got a little older, he saw how anxious Henry was about keeping it a secret, so he understood it wasn't the kind of secret he should betray.

The less Adam interacts with others, the better LOL

Thank you for asking :-) It's a bit messy but I hope I did it well enough :-)

[robininthelabyrinth]

Age Reversal RuoJue. In which Nie Mingjue is a century’s old sect leader and Wen Ruohan is a bastard orphan who is trying to make a name for himself AND win his hand

A/N: I'm kind of fascinated with where you got the idea of NMJ being a bastard orphan from tbh?? I mean, role reversal implies NMJ had those qualities first and then you give them to WRH...anyway

-

“Maybe we should change it up in this life,” Nie Huaisang said, and Nie Mingjue glanced at him sidelong. His little brother had that contemplative tone of voice he got when he was making trouble. “No, really! Doesn’t it get old, you know, all those Nie sect leaders dying tragically from qi deviations –”

“We’re not not doing the qi deviation thing,” Nie Mingjue interrupted, frowning. “It’s our thing.”

Nie Huaisang rolled his eyes and patted him on the arm. “Yes, yes, I know, and you do so love putting on a grand performance, all red eyes and blood everywhere, all the drama of it.”

Nie Mingjue didn’t dignify that with an answer, even though it was true that it was kind of fun to let loose sometimes. He usually didn’t allow himself the chance.

“Listen, I’m not saying we’re not going to do it,” Nie Huaisang said soothingly. “We have to find a way to ‘die young’ somehow, right? Otherwise people will start thinking we’re immortal.”

“Huaisang. We are immortal.”

“But other people don’t need to know that, isn’t that what we agreed? That’s the usual routine: first you’re the sect leader and everything’s all well and good, then you die tragically and I take over, mourn sadly, fritter away a few decades in the role, grow disgustingly old and grey –”

“You don’t have to use that much makeup.”

“I like the make-up. Anyway, when I’m old, I then adopt a charming young man – or maybe I have a standing in ‘kid’ who grows up into a charming young man – and die at some convenient time, then ta-da! You’re sect leader again, just in time for a revival of the sect.”

“Is there a reason you’re reciting the routine to me? It’s not like I haven’t lived it with you.”

“I’m just saying: how about we swap it up this time?”

Nie Mingjue arched his eyebrows.

“I get to be the self-destructive wonderful asshole that is doomed to die young in a qi deviation,” Nie Huaisang proposed. “You get to be the mourning son. Sound good?”

Nie Mingjue snorted.

“What? What’s wrong with it?”

“Oh, nothing. I’ll be mourning you all right, but only because someone is going to kill you first.”

“Are you saying you think I’ll get murdered before I qi deviate?”

“I’m willing to bet money on it.”

Nie Huaisang grinned. “You’re so on.”

(Some time later, Nie Mingjue poked Nie Huaisang. "Hey, expert in mourning," he said. "What's the loophole that says I can still pick up what's getting dropped down in front of me here?"

"I can't believe you want to sleep with my murderer," Nie Huaisang sniffed. "But also, yeah, you should definitely go for it. He's cute!")

[woniiwasp]

hello everybody! we begin the weekly ritual of last-minute aitsf theoryposting before stream. we just learned that uchikoshi is a coward and DIDN’T twinkify shoma in the timeskip.

i think shoma is immortal and i’m scared of his power now

god, a lot of the tearer’s man cave stuff makes me think we might be dealing with an unintroduced person as the culprit. not a fan of that, but uchikoshi has pulled that before, so

tearer is 100% tokiko and chikara’s kid. the age doesn’t seem to add up to jin, though. he was 29 at his time of death, and masked woman specifically gives an age a little over that number 7 years later, and says they’re dead. i’d have to double-check.

specifically, it looks like we have two adopted kids: jin and tearer. jin is definitely the missing aioen kid, but tearer was adopted to somebody else shortly after getting into the orphanage or whatever. if i had to bet money, i’d say jin is so’s kid.

this has the added benefit of hitting on our two halves of a whole motif

god i need to double check so much here.

the jin half thing is weird, because it seems to imply jin got killed twice--once normally, and once when his DNA became chikara, and his guts were ripped out. what if jin was killed second, not first, and the first death was somebody else?

this raises the question of why tearer would do this. no idea tbh.

oh also ryuki has been infected with tc-perge

[songofclarity]

(Was going through my notes app and found this but I'm not sure if I already sent it to you or not so I'm sending it again just in case lol please ignore if you already received this ask)

Idk if this would count as a prompt or rant lol but I kinda hate it when fics imply WRH has no taste (I mean this would work for CQL WRH but personally I don't consider CQL WRH Canon) IMO he must be extra and refined and picky in his tastes. He probably goes to a conference in an other sect and judges them very hard for their lack of taste and refinement.

Like everytime he's in koi tower he goes "look how gaudy this place is. Some people think covering everything in gold makes it look refined and elegant" and that's without talking of JGS's private "parties" that he has to attend sometimes and that leave him wanting to either set koi tower on fire or go home, take a long scalding bath, and scrub the whole outer layer of his skin off.

He doesn't know who's the genius who thought building lotus Pier on a pond was a good idea but he doesn't see the appeal of the stench, the unbearable humidity, and all the insects! He also thinks it's very improper how the jiangs can't keep their domestic arguments private and how madam Yu has to involve everyone in LP in her marital affairs, even the guests! WRH doesn't want to be part of your latest hysterics ma'am! He just took his 3rd bath of the day and is trying to have a nice refreshing drink in this suffocating heat, please leave him alone!

The "unclean realm" is truly worthy of its name in his opinion, the servants must be utterly incompetent and lazy to leave the main hall dusty like this and serve the dinner cold and an hour late. Also did no one teach the Nies basic table manners like "don't chew your food with your mouth open" and "don't speak with your mouth full" and "don't have an arm wrestling match at the dinner table" ?

The Cloud Recesses is tolerable enough but why would anyone need 3000 rules to live with? That's a little overboard isn't it? And how do the lans survive on their diet? are they descended from rabbits? Also who told LQR a 4 hour lecture on the history of Lan poetry was a good post conference entertainment? And how is WRH supposed to go through the ordeal without even a cup of wine? Maybe he should fake a migraine and retire to his room early?

Needless to say WRH thinks nightless city is the best by far and that's his objective opinion! No, he doesn't think he's being biased because nightless city is his home where he grew up and spent his whole life.

Everyone has a right to their own headcanons, but I agree, the mere idea that Wen RuoHan has no taste is just bizarre. Last I checked, those festivities he hosted in Qishan were a hit! No one was complaining about having to eat Qishan Wen food or put on some Qishan Wen disciple robes or shoot some QIshan Wen kites. Wangxian wearing Qishan Wen robes even has plenty of official art and merch because the style looks so darn good!

And those are the robes worn with pride by Qishan Wen cultivators and disciples on the norm. Everyone wants to be part of the Qishan Wen, guest cultivators love being part of the Qishan Wen! It’s only those other sects that have an issue with them, and it’s never an issue with Wen RuoHan’s taste.

But Wen RuoHan having an issue with everyone’s else’s taste is hilarious. I did receive this message before, but since you wrote so much already, let’s just play around with the idea for now! There are four reasons he never wants to leave his home and they’re called Cloud Recesses, Koi Tower, Lotus Pier, and the Unclean Realm, in that order...

As opposed to finding Cloud Recesses tolerable enough, my thought is that Wen RuoHan would think it's the worst! There is something very arrogant about not only having 3,000 rules, but immortalizing them on stone and forcing them on your guests. Wen RuoHan is the leader of the Qishan Wen. He is NOT a child! Wen RuoHan does NOT go to bed at 9 if he doesn’t feel like it and his subordinates CAN play music for him at 10 to help him sleep! All this smell of sandalwood is aggravating his headache from listening to Lan QiRen for three hours. His servants had to go to Gusu to buy his party a real dinner. So get these annoying Gusu Lan off his porch, he doesn’t need them trying to boss him around! The audacity of this place! One more word out of them and he’s burning this place to the ground!

Jin GuangShan invited Wen RuoHan to one (1) of his private parties and it lasted less time than it takes to burn a stick of incense. Wen RuoHan is not cultivating a perfect body for other people to touch and he did NOT travel all this way to watch Jin GuangShan and his posse act like animals in heat. What do you mean they were fucking in the kitchen? In the main hall?? Are these sheets clean or was Jin GuangShan here, too??? The waters of Lotus Pier are sounding quite nice right about now because it will take that much water to make Wen RuoHan feel clean again...! Don’t ever invite him to Koi Tower again, Jin GuangShan, letters only.

Lotus Pier is kind of... uncomfortable. Messy. Half-eaten lotus pods around the place, abandoned robes hanging off ledges by the water (he’s getting Koi Tower flashbacks), and disciples lounging half-dressed in the sun like lazy cats. Is this even a sect? Is he lost?? Who is in charge here??? There should be at least some order. But ah, he can’t be mad about the kids making too much noise outside. Wen RuoHan loves his kids, after all, and then there is Jiang Fengmian, who only keeps bringing up his bastard, which Wen RuoHan supposes is an improvement to Jin GuangShan. Oh, Wei WuXian is an orphan, son of a former servant, brought to Lotus Pier at age 8? Very talented, is he? And... Jiang FengMian didn't adopt him? Bring him into the family? Now Yu ZiYuan is staring at her husband with enough intensity to melt steel. This conversation just got awkward real fast. Also the lotus seeds taste nasty but everyone here keeps eating them like it’s normal. This place is making Wen RuoHan feel like a crazy person and he needs to go.

Now the Unclean Realm is strangely tolerable if only because it’s laughable. Wen RuoHan has never felt so important in his life. He is the sun in the sky if only because they never take their eyes off of him! Everyone looks like they might snap in half if he breathes too hard. Was that a laugh he heard or was it the wind? He touched a door and now three people are inspecting it as if it were poisoned. None of these people have so much as heard of entertainment. (What do you mean it’s because they don’t trust him? What did he do??) He did like what he saw of the saber practice, but they all pounced on him as if he were trespassing, as if they caught him in the middle of a murder! He knows all the sects call them Wen-dogs, but the Nie are the ones hounding his step everywhere he goes! Aren't they exhausted being so uptight? Because he's exhausted just watching them.

Nightless City truly is home sweet home 💖

[violexides]

The DreamSMP Explained (By Someone Who Has Never Watched Any DreamSMP Stream)

cracks knuckles. okay, fucking FINALLY doing this. ahem. 

Couple things to preface with, will keep this brief. 

This isn’t entirely blind. One of my best friends has helped out in places, just because I wanted to hit on everything (accurate or not), and I know mutuals/friends who post and write about DreamSMP (though how much of that is AU or canon-typical, I can’t say. I can’t tell). I’ve never seen a single stream, but I’ve seen a few clips. So, my understanding is a bit more than the title may imply, but still not a lot. Sorry.

Also, this will be very, very long (near 2k words). All under the cut, will TW this with themes of abuse, death, manipulation, unreality, hallucinations, and me having an abrasive sense of humor where I revel in the glee of calling these guys European twinks. Though, speaking of. This is ALL about the actual characters, not the people. I don’t know anything about most of these actual streamers, so, no hate to them. In fact, I think they’re pretty cool for having come up with a… somewhat coherent… narrative, all through using Minecraft as a medium. Anyway.

Sigh. Without further ado, 

So. There’s this place. Made by Philza, AKA God, AKA one of like six different gods. Philza, born from the womb acting like someone’s 43 year old uncle, has three kids. Wilbur, Tommy, and Tubbo. There are other people here, with some scattered ancestry that raises some questions, but I don’t really care who fucked an Enderman and had an 8’0 tall kid (Ranboo DNI).

There are also places! Sometimes! On a good day, there are actual, intact locations. We’ve got hits like “The Badlands”, which I think was taken from about three different dystopian novels I read in third grade, “El Rapids” (Quackity, Subpoena (autocorrect wins this round), and Karl made this one), “Pogtopia”, no comment on this one, and “L’Manberg”, which Wilbur made. 

Only one of these is going to be important.

So, might be a good time to say this: I don’t know what the inciting incident of DreamSMP is? I don’t know what was the catalyst for all this shit, but I’m going to take a guess and say Wilbur blowing up L’Manberg had something to do with it.

… That’s going to be a pattern, by the way. Just. Stick with me here. 

So, Wilbur is an older child who read the Hamlet parts in literature class and can only cope by ripping down the very creations he has and taking the entire world down with him to hell. Which is to say, he throws a pity party after Jschlatt (some bitch who abused Quackity, that’s another trend, yippee) wins an election and decides to blow up the fucking kingdom and kill Jschlatt.

Little does Wilbur know, the devil may work fast, but Jschlatt getting a fucking stroke and dying out of nowhere works faster. 

I’m not kidding. He gets a stroke, he dies, and Tubbo takes over. I’ve tried to puzzle out the government structure of DreamSMP for a while and have drawn zero conclusions. In any case, Wilbur also tells Philza, his… father…, to kill him. And Philza fucking does? For some reason, like, holy shit.

Anyway. Wilbur is now a ghost. So is Jschlatt. The… life system, on this server, is really strange and I don’t know how to fully explain it. Just know that nothing has permanence here. 

I’m going to throw this out here because I don’t know when it’s relevant, but I wrote down something about Karl being in a place called the In Between. I don’t know how the hell he got there or what the hell he’s doing. This might be where the discs are? I can’t explain the discs. I… think they are fighting over the discs? Don’t know why, Wilbur makes music himself, I feel like you have enough to go around.

(Stream Saline Solution it reminds me of my best friend only if you want okay thx)

L’Manberg gets blown up again. This time, Techno did it. He did it just after giving this speech about Theseus, which, jokes aside-- the writing of DreamSMP is actually really good. That was all done on improv, and I did watch an animatic with some of the audio from it, and damn. I’m a whore for metaphor and I love this for him.

This happens, and Ranboo and Tommy decide to do a little hehe and burn down George’s house. Who is George? Good question: a king. Of what? Good question: call me the antithesis of a Ranboo kinnie and get me some discs because I hear no answers.

Dream gets pissed off by this (who gave him authority, I don’t know) and builds a wall. He for some reason decides that if Tommy, and only Tommy, breaks some rules, the wall will stay up forever. So, naturally, Tommy immediately yells at him, and Tubbo gets pissed (what happened to the whole, who are you without me, yourself, thing?). Dream exiles him, which is bad enough, but then Dream burns down his house, so now he’s double exiled.

Dream kins Julius Caesar but Julius Caesar does not kin Dream and I think that’s important. 

(It had to be important enough for me to literally go back and edit this in, for no reason, because I think I’m really fucking hilarious.) 

Techno takes in Tommy and shows him his super secret cave of evil, which Tommy promptly screams at. Philza and Ranboo visit sometimes, but mostly Tommy just sits there. Dream says “fuck you” to Techno, but Techno decides to wage war on L’Manberg, so Quackity and co. come over to try and kill Techno, but Techno kills Quackity with a pickaxe, but Quackity has three lives for some reason, and then Dream blames Ranboo for blowing something up for literally zero reason, and can you tell how tired I am.

Ranboo sees a smiley face in his notebook and zones the fuck out while Dream tries to kill… Tommy? No, Tubbo. No, fuck, no it was Tommy. I don’t know why people suddenly care about it n- NO, NO IT WAS TUBBO, he is TRYING to kill TUBBO. 

I hate Europeans. 

Ahem. Dream goes to jail, but he has books in jail, which is a horrible idea. Everyone knows that if you give a war criminal some novels he’ll accidentally haunt someone else’s dreams and launch psychological warfare with the prison guard, Sam, who has zero idea what he’s doing because he probably didn’t sign up for this.

Also, I’m gonna say this here because I don’t know when it will fit in. There’s this place. Called… the Egg. Now, I don’t know what goes on in the Egg. I don’t know what the Egg is. I don’t know who decided to name all these fucking things, because I think the Egg is just a box made of bedrock. I think Ranboo hallucinates about it, but Ranboo hallucinates about everything so I’m not really sure. I’m going to call it here and say that this is probably a bad sign.

People are trying to talk to Dream. First BadBoyHalo, who gives Ranboo this little note from Dream with a smiley face. Or maybe that was SapNap. Either way, Ranboo hallucinates seeing Dream, and then actually sees Dream but he thinks he’s hallucinating? I don’t know. 

Then we get Tommy. Basically he kind of comes in here and Sam, being a good prison guard, allows Dream to beat Tommy to death and then revive him (don’t ask about the revivals just pretend it makes sense please). He tells Tommy he’s also going to revive Wilbur which Tommy isn’t a big fan of, considering that Wilbur, uh. Vague hand gestures. You get the schtick. Hopefully. I don’t know.

Anyway. Uh. Quackity loses his shit, also.

As in he talks to Jschlatt, the ghost of his abusive husband. Makes a deal-- if Quackity here loses, he revives Jschlatt. I don’t know what the winning conditions are, but, thankfully, they don’t matter because Quackity loses damn near instantly. 

So he goes to Dream and Sam gives him really powerful gear for no reason. Dream is a bit terrified by this situation, and Quackity is like “give me the fucking book”, and then we never find out what happens because Quackity ends up covered in blood about to blow up El Rapids. I hadn’t expected to mark Quackity off on the demolitionist bingo, but hey, all’s fair I guess. My next bets are on Tubbo or whichever bitch became god of the sea. 

(I also made a joke to my friend about me kinning Quackity (the character not the streamer could you fucking imagine), to which they said “you’d torture someone for information”? So. I guess Dream, uh. Hm. That explains why Quackity was bloodied. Uh. Oops. Don’t know why he’s playing Poker, though.)

So, for my sanity, as we come to a close, I’m going to start listing lore details that I don’t know nearly enough about but are probably important. Just… bullet point them. Might be a bit tacky of me but I have shit to do, dammit. By that I mean, I don’t have shit to do, but I’ve had this doc open for literally 1-2 weeks and I just want to be freed.

List Of Other Shit That Happened:

Ranboo started an arg, so there’s a character named Z now. Can’t believe the kid I knew in middle school who didn’t know where the Middle East  was made it into the dreamSMP omg! 

Tubbo did something immoral, and we still don’t know who his dad is. By we, I mean me. 

Eret exists. That’s all I’ve got for this one. They’re important. Probably.

Karl hallucinated six versions of himself and left the In Between to go to hell. (Lil Nas X girlboss gaslight gatekeep in this motherfucker!!!)

Ranboo and Tubbo got married because taxes exist </3

More on this last point: they opened a hotel, despite Tubbo being a king, and Tommy got mad at them for getting engaged without his permission. But Tommy was literally dead when they had the wedding so I’m not exactly sure what he was expecting. Either way, he’s fine with it now.

Kids getting adopted oh shit oh fuck. Also, mpreg is canotical. Make this what you will. 

DreamXD is a god now. I don’t know who DreamXD is. I don’t think anybody else does either.

I’m like 60% sure George is dead. 

I’m like 60% sure Philza is immortal.

Going through my ‘notes’ to make sure I didn’t miss anything and I’m just getting more confused, so I think I’m going to call it here. Props to everyone in the dreamSMP for creating kickass lore, I would not summarize any of it ever again if you held me at fucking gunpoint, and thanks to my mutuals/friends for letting me ask a lot of really stupid questions as I try to puzzle this out. And also, another thanks to you all for reading this. I hope to God this was funny. 

I really, really, really fucking hope that Tumblr doesn’t cut this off for a long character count. This is longer than some of my fucking oneshots. My God. This was so fun, don’t get me wrong, but I also want a hit of a candy cigarette. Make it two, actually. Or three. All at once. 

Anyway. Drink some water, stay safe, and remember that statistically speaking, 100% of people with a name starting with “T” need to put down the Greek mythology books and learn about the ethics behind pyromania. Goodbye, Theseus. 

[comeandreadawhile]

Cullen Family HCs

I’m jumping on the twilight renaissance train

Smeyer is wrong and vampires can sleep, they just need to sleep like once a month.  

Esme is the favorite pillow of the Cullen house.  She has an adjustable standing desk so she can work on the couch while one of the boys naps with their head on her lap.

The kids have seen some messed up things already in their immortality.  Carlisle and Esme leave their door open and any given night, sleeping or not, 1 to 5 of the kids stand a good chance of moseying in and settling down for the night.  They’ve had to upgrade to a California king so Emmett doesn’t squish the girls and Edward doesn’t kick Jasper off the bed again.  

If Esme is in her and Carlisle’s room, Alice and Rosalie tend to join if they’ve had a long day or just need some comfort.  Emmett is a snuggler and will absolutely worm in between them like a newborn litter of puppies.  Seriously they needed the bigger bed, Carlisle has come home from the hospital to find Esme happily covered in teenagers just reading a book or patting their hair while they vent.    

The kids have all called them mom and dad in some form at some point.  

Alice calls them mom and dad around the house pretty frequently, Rosalie calls Esme mom, and though very rare, calls Carlisle dad or father.  

Emmett calls Esme ma, mom, or mama.  Absolute mama’s boy, he hugs her when they get home from school and gives her a kiss on the cheek when they leave in the mornings.  He is the most frequent couch napper,   followed by Edward.  He loves going to the garden center with Esme to pick out plants for her flowerbed and to carry bags of dirt.  He calls Carlisle dad and pops and has supplied half the sweaters in the man’s closet.

Jasper tends to call them ma/mom and dad/pop like Emmett.  They know he’s had a day when they’re in their respective home workspaces and he comes to sit on the floor by their chair.  Esme will pat his hair and ask if he wants to talk about it, and if not she’ll show him what painting or blueprints she’s working on; Carlisle knows he’ll talk when he’s ready and gives a firm few pats on the shoulder, asking instead some philosophical question to take Jasper’s mind off of whatever it is. Of all the kids, he’s the one most likely to end up at the foot of their bed instead of the middle.  Though not always touchy, he likes being nearby.    

Esme can tell Edward has had a day when he hugs her and just buries his face in her shoulder.  Though less frequent than Emmett or Alice, he calls her mom when addressing her and mother when speaking of her to others.  Likewise, he calls Carlisle dad and pop, but father to others. He loves his parents so much.  He lives off of ruffled hair and departing hugs.

If  they remember their birthdays, they celebrate on that day.  If they don’t, they use the day they were turned, or joined the family, or just a day they like and that’s their new birthday.  Whatever the birthday boy/girl wants to do, it’s done. They’ve been to Orlando and Hollywood theme parks, and international counterparts, so many times for birthdays.

Emmett and Alice love Disney and Pixar, Rose and Jazz love Marvel, Edward loves Harry Potter.  They rotate choice for movie nights.  

Since Esme uses the Ashton Martin when she needs it, it’s Jasper’s turn for a car.  He gets a big truck.  Bella’s truck has jealousy-filled nightmares about Jasper’s truck.  Emmett likes riding standing up in the bed pretending to be king of the world. It’s black with tinted windows, and Emmett made the mistake of putting his feet on the dash once.    

Jasper and Emmett get to go out when the winter weather’s sunny because they have cowboy hats.  Jasper got Emmett his first pair of cowboy boots.  Rosalie hates them.  

Seriously they throw on some flannels, jeans, their hats and boots and Esme lets the yeehaw boys whenever they want if they behave (jackets are only if humans will question not having one).  

Jazz and Em blast country music to mess with Edward.  If they’re really annoyed with him they’ll sing along.  New Moon saw lots of country music.

Mother’s and Father’s day are sacred in this house.  The local garden center employees know to expect shortages the rest of the month because the boys come clear out most of their flowers for Esme’s garden.  The hospital knows to expect Carlisle taking off because the kids are not above stealing him from his office.  

Carlisle and Edward didn’t really do Christmas until Esme joined the family.  It was always such an effort to try surprising Ed, and then surprising Alice when she and Jasper had their first Christmas with the family.  Now that Bella is around it is profoundly easier to have surprise presents again.  Alice and Edward help their parents decorate the house while Rosalie, Emmett and Jasper pick out a tree and bicker over who gets to carry it inside.    

There’s an egg hunt every year and these kids are so competitive about it.  Alice and Edward are forbidden from using their powers to cheat, and Esme and Carlisle switch off hiding the eggs while the other goes over rules; they have to run around the area a few extra times to make sure the kids don’t find the eggs by scent alone.  These things are hidden in the car wheels, the garage, on the roof; anywhere on the outside property is fair game.  

If you thought Jacob, Seth and Leah were any less adopted after breaking dawn you would be wrong.  Leah and Jake help Rose on the cars, the boys all wrestle with Seth in the yard and Esme always has plenty of food in the house for them.

There are always plenty of extra clothes in the house in case the wolves need them.  

Carlisle can never find the sweater he wants to wear because Esme, Edward and Jasper steal them.  Rose and Alice frequently steal Emmett’s sweatshirts. Someone goes to pick up one of Emmett’s sweatshirts off the couch and Alice pops her head out of the head hole when they grab it.

Despite being immune to the cold Esme still likes bundling the exasperated teenagers up, tying their scarves before they leave home.

One time a Karen was bad mouthing Esme when she and the kids were in a store (something about being a gold digger doctor’s wife and using five foster kids for the government money) and that is the first time they saw Jasper go at someone for something other than blood.  That lady got a hateful and quite corrective earful because that is his mama, thank you very much!  The glares of the Cullen brood make the Karen feel like she’s being hunted after that.

A more civil but no less threatening correction is given to anyone who implies to Dr. and Mrs. Cullen that they aren’t the father and mother of their brood simply because the kids are adopted.  

[overclocksaa]

anon / Hi, I have seen you talk about Howard and I really enjoy ur analysis. You are damn good. I have one question/confusion. Is Howard evil? I know he is an ass and abusive but I mean like evil- as in supervillain? Because when I read the marvel wiki page, it went from him being a SHIELD Agent and protecting humans and going after those that misused his weapons to him working with Mephisto? Like I thought he was like Endeavor from bnha. A terrible abusive father but outside the house he was “well respected” u know? 

honestly, i guess this is one of those questions where it’s up to the individual reader to make those moral calls.  i mean i, personally, feel like howard is an irredeemable shitsack, but that’s me.  i have a lot of Personal Feelings, considering i - full disclosure once again - was abused as a kid in much the same way as tony, and got gaslighted to hell about not knowing anything, that it was just wanting what’s best for me, parents are hard on the eldest, etc, so i see red every time marvel deigns to slap howard stark in a panel.

(don’t get me started on the mcu’s sorry ass howard stark apologist vibe, either, i will fucking scream.)

the thing about howard, and his being a shield agent and member of the brotherhood of the shield and all that happy shit, is the fact that the whole time he’s doing these things, he’s whining about how his family is holding him back and down.  he’s adopting a baby of a shield agent he basically slutshames to use as a decoy for his actual son (arno).  we find out later - if you want to count it, and i guess we might as well - he tried to sell tony as a baby to dracula (probably for his harem) and then his soul to mephisto (which tony actually witnessed) for selfish ends (immortality).  i guess he’s jealous of leonardo da vinci or something, i don’t know.  he even talks about at some point he’s going to have to bounce, and he’s going to do so faking his death (a car accident - sound familiar?).  joke’s on him tho he literally actually died so.  shrug emoji.

howard is like most abusers in that the  outside world thought he was a respectable guy doing good things in the name of his country, or whatever, yet.  you can go all the way back through to the 60s of tony’s story and see hints that howard has always just been Like This.  like, if we need more, how about:  experimenting on his own son in utero and planning on fucking over an alien robot over it.  all the times he belittled and sometimes got physical with tony over tony doing things normal small children do - despite having a big brain - like playing with toys and being upset over the death of a pet.  he was a member of the hellfire club, which is in and of itself Enough. 

also you have to remember that like.  tony was a shy, quiet kid who preferred to read and tinker by himself and in general just be nerdy with his own special interests while howard more than subtly implied homophobic things here at the same time being irrationally angry that his son wasn’t more of a manly man.  he sent tony to a boarding school at seven where he was bullied and by all accounts had trouble fitting in and making friends, and then when he came home for holidays/breaks, he hung out with the butler who was a hundred times more a father to tony than howard ever was.  howard tried to control every aspect of tony’s life and was praised for it, and all it’s done in the end is cause tony endless grief with feeling like he’ll never Be Enough and desperately seeking that approval from others (steve rogers blatantly comes to mind here). 

i think, in the end, while there’s a certain amount of personal interpretation that goes into how far you wanna slide on some scale of good and evil, overall i think the adage of the banality of evil is very true, especially in this case.  like...howard doesn’t have to be a mustache-twirling snidely whiplash to be a real shitsack (and also by all accounts he was just as horrible in the business world, he regularly ran friends/associates out of business - ty stone’s father, we don’t know what happened with his brother edward but we can make some pretty good guesses there).  he abused a child he adopted to use as a decoy for his own biological son and proceeded to make his life miserable up until the day he died.  if that’s not some definition of evil i don’t know what is.

[haec-est-fides]

“What have you done?” : Why Riordan’s Handling of Triumvirate Holdings Sucks

I put my thoughts under a cut to make it easier to avoid spoilers and to save you all from a long post,,,like a really long post.

Basically, I think it was inevitable that Riordan fumble Triumvirate Holdings. He simply designed a villain network too powerful and too extensive to ever be handled properly by the heroes. He did try to address,,,some of it, but in the end I think he just made it worse.

I. Let’s talk about Triumvirate Holdings.

The way that Riordan established the origins of the Triumvirate and the extent of their power made it too big to handle from the beginning. The emperors have been around for centuries. It’s mentioned countless times how much property they own, how much money they have, and how many businesses are actually under their control. Rachel says it well in Hidden Oracle: “They make my dad’s company look like a kid’s lemonade stand.” Nero brings it up again in Tower of Nero: “What you don’t seem to realize, Apollo, is that you can’t destroy bank accounts with a bow and arrows. All my assets, all the power I’ve built up for centuries -- it’s all safe.” Think of what Caligula did to Piper and her dad, how deep that ran and how many people were involved. Think of how the Triumvirate funded both Luke and Octavian. All of this goes to show how deeply rooted Triumvirate Holdings is, especially -- unlike other villains -- in the mortal world.

This never really gets taken into account. For instance, Apollo does wonder if Meg will inherit Nero’s tower, but it seems as if she doesn’t, nor do any of the other imperials who go with her to Palm Springs. They live off of the Sibyl’s tarot card business, which strongly implies that they took nothing from the tower -- or the company -- at all.

Apollo also mentions Camp Half-Blood getting the weapons and Greek fire from Nero’s tower, but that is so poorly thought out that I want to scream. Nero had designed special holding tanks for the Greek fire, tanks that Rachel pointed out could be mistaken for a water-treatment facility. And we’re transferring it to a summer camp? Yikes.

Beyond the question of the material, there’s the question of personnel. Mortals, demigods / legacies, monsters, Germani, etc. were all involved with Triumvirate Holdings. I’ll address the Germani in a moment, but the sheer numbers involved make the fall of the company either impossible or devastating. It is conceivable that the mortals, business people and mercenaries alike, could move on and the Mist would do its work. Still, that’s thousands of people jobless. The unemployment rate just skyrocketed. Further, the monsters once under Triumvirate control are now presumably free to cause havoc as well.

Before moving on entirely, multiply all of that by three. Commodus and Caligula employed mortals and monsters as well, and who knows what happened to their material possessions. (Besides the fifty yachts in San Francisco Bay, ofc. Millions of dollars, minimum, at the bottom of the ocean.)

What I’m most concerned about, however, are the demigods / legacies, especially those raised by or who spent considerable time with the Triumvirate. An experience like that shapes people, and not for the better.

II. Let’s talk about the Imperial Households.

Starting with Nero’s household, I think it’s clear that Riordan brushed over the imperials to have his wholesome ending, which is entirely understandable. Even so, he creates such a conflicting view of them that his “they all moved to Aeithales and Healed” bit is so shallow. Apollo’s views in particular cause this problem.

Initially, the fact that the imperials are enemies puts them in this strange category where they’re minors and people (like Meg) but them being harmed or even killed,,,isn’t a bad thing? Chiron, directing new campers during the Greek attack on the tower, yells, “Try not to kill enemy demigods or mortals! Okay, well, from now on, then!” It’s given the weight of a throw-away line. Apollo later goes so far as to think, “I wondered where the other three missing adoptees had gone -- if they’d been captured or had fallen in battle to Camp Half-Blood. I tried not to feel any satisfaction at the thought, but it was difficult.” (Emphasis mine. Oh, and if anyone is interested, this is almost an exact parallel to what Apollo says in Tyrant’s Tomb about Octavian’s death.) I’m not saying that Apollo hasn’t really changed or that heroes have to value the lives of their enemies, but this isn’t the best foot to start on.

In Nero’s throne room, when Meg gets her imperial siblings under control, Apollo comments on how close they are to siding with Nero: “[Meg] reminded me of one of Hades’s dog trainers working with a pack of new hellhounds. ...any sign of weakness from her, any change in the temperature of the battle, and they might break ranks and slaughter everyone in sight.” Even after Nero’s death, the imperials break down. Raging, sobbing, catatonic -- whatever the case, not exactly the best candidates for a smooth adjustment to ordinary life.

Apollo and Meg briefly chat about how the household will need support to heal, but Apollo still notes, with some real hesitancy, “There were no guarantees. The imperial demigods had dealt with so much for so long, some of them might never be able to come back from the darkness.” A short while later, at Aeithales, Apollo observes that the imperials “seemed determined to garden, as if their sanity depended on it, which perhaps it did.” While Cassius, at the very least, seems to be adjusting well, who’s to say that the others are? They can’t garden forever. I just can’t picture this ending as well as Riordan leaves it.

All of that is bad enough, but we know that Nero’s “household” is larger than just the twelve demigods he adopted, and it’s likely that Commodus and Caligula had similar households. Remember Marcus, Meg’s escort in Dark Prophecy? Whether he was one of Nero’s twelve (and got replaced) or not, his existence is evidence that there are far more demigods / legacies involved than the series’ focus would make us think at first glance. We do see members of Commodus’ household in Dark Prophecy, in the stands of the stadium and in the battle against the Waystation -- “a few dozen” even. Interestingly, Caligula is the only triumvir who doesn’t seem to have a household at all, as they’re never mentioned aboard his yachts. That may be exactly as it seems, with him preferring not to have a household out of paranoia. However, I still think it’d be more reasonable to assume that he had some kind of household than to assume otherwise.

Nero’s household appears to have been the most imperial and the most like a family, but that doesn’t mean we can brush off the other households as a non-issue. Considering the lack on information on the subject, it’s entirely possible that the other two emperors did adopt kids. In any case, we can’t judge the loyalty of these unknown demigods / legacies, and they certainly seem to have fallen through the cracks. It’s doubtful that Nero’s children will be able to “heal” even with Meg’s help and a place totally removed from their old life. If the others don’t have any kind of support system? If they’re left to their own devices? That’s a recipe for disaster. They’re likely to cling to the system they know in whatever ways they can.

As a bit of a thought experiment to drive this home, consider: what would Octavian do if he were part of Triumvirate Holdings when the news arrived that the emperors were all dead? I think it’s clear than the answer is not “go live a normal life and pretend the Triumvirate never existed.” It would be naive to think that not a single person in the Triumvirate’s sphere is willing to step up and take over.

III. Let’s talk about the Germani.

Riordan actually explained this well, but then proceeded to fuck up.

I had questioned why the Germani -- ordinary legacies / humans -- could be turned to “monster” dust once resurrected and put in an emperor’s service. What kind of afterlife did that mean they had? Thankfully, Riordan touched on this! As @triumvirateds pointed out on my older post, the Germani -- like most ordinary monsters -- did come back in a day or two after being killed. This apparent immortality, we find, is tied to the Triumvirate’s power, symbolized by each emperor’s fasces. When the Germani were revived, however the Triumvirate accomplished that, they became removed from any usual afterlife until released from the Triumvirate’s service and made “regular people” again.

(This does raise some technical questions. Were each group of Germani tied to a specific emperor? Meaning that the troops on the West coast were “released” when Commodus’ and Caligula’s fasces were destroyed? I’m fairly certain that they still turned to dust during the final confrontation with New Rome. That would imply that their loyalty was tied to the Triumvirate as a whole, and their bond transferred to Nero’s fasces with the power of the other two emperors.)

However, I can’t believe Riordan decided that the Germani would simply be regular people after Nero’s death. Throughout the series, Apollo often remarks that the Germani are a threat because of their loyalty. Remember when the Germani were described as “sensitive about insults to the Imperial person” and nearly killed Apollo for looking at Nero wrong? Well, now Apollo says, “I supposed none of them loved the idea of staying loyal to the cause of a dead emperor.” I’m reminded of when, after Commodus and Caligula were defeated in New Rome, the army ran away and was never mentioned again. In both cases, the Germani are brushed off as disloyal / uncaring and no thought is given as to how they’re supposed to integrate into modern society.

“But wait,” you might argue, “They’re mercenaries. Many of them, like Luguselwa, probably don’t care about the emperors.” Sure. There’s definitely a long history of mercenary troops not being the most loyal, especially when there isn’t a clear leader. However, I have to bring up the fact that when Nero died (in actual history) the German guard was disbanded by one of the following emperors due to their perceived loyalty to Nero, even in death. (Also, because the guard was disbanded for their loyalty, which was a major insult, the entire tribe revolted.) That’s a bit of an oversimplification of ancient history, but with the constant reminders we have in the series about the Germani’s loyalty, this ending just seems like a cheap move by Riordan. He might as well have had them all turn to dust one last time with the dissolution of the Triumvirate’s power. Also, if you even entertain the possibility that someone could step forward to take control of Triumvirate Holdings, I feel that the Germani would serve whoever that was.

On the purely practical side of things, please try to imagine thousands of (possibly illiterate) barbarians adjusting to modern life with zero help. I’m not saying it’s impossible, considering the amount of time they’ve been around (and how they seem to legally exist, as evidenced by Luguselwa being Meg’s legal guardian), but it’s still a stretch of the imagination with how Riordan characterized them throughout the series.

TL;DR

To wrap it up, you just can’t make villainy this pervasive, throw out some guesses as to how things will work out fine, and pretend the world can just move on. Triumvirate Holdings isn’t a snake that dies when you cut its head off; it’s a hydra. The life that almost everyone involved in Triumvirate Holdings lived makes them who they are. Not everyone will end up like Meg, especially considering the sheer number of people impacted. I know that all of this isn’t really Riordan’s concern, that he couldn’t have covered even half of this if he wanted to, but gods does it bother me.

[missholoska]

Time for the Dreemurr siblings cousins! ❤️🐐

(For anyone unfamiliar with my Swap content, see the character sheets for Papyrus & Sans, Undyne & Alphys, Asgore & Toriel, and more about Underswap MH here!)

The thing with Dandelion (Asgore) being Sage’s uncle was explained on his and Toriel’s sheet, but to give a quick reminder: it’s because Toriel, Asgore and Asriel all being alive in Underswap with none of them aging doesn’t make sense to me, and I still want Asriel to have a family bond with both of them. It’s not a perfect middle ground, but it works for me 👍

anyways, the usual additional rambles are under the cut!

Swap Chara's nickname seemed like a fitting way of showing that they are in fact a good merciful child and not Murderous Demon Baby Extraordinare™, but it was mostly chosen because no matter how many times I hear people pronounce Chara as 'care-a' or 'kara', my brain absolutely refuses to stop saying it as 'char-a' with a proper 'ch' sound, and nicknaming them Charity means everyone has to pronounce it like I do :D (side note: keep in mind the nicknames I give the Swap MH cast are not used in-universe, and as such Charity isn't their full name or anything. it also isn't intended to imply anything about their gender, please let this kid be non-binary in peace)

As for Swap Asriel's nickname, I'm not gonna pretend I actually know anything about the meanings of flowers, but while looking up various plants to name him after (in keeping with Dandelion and Orchid) I did find mentions of sage meaning immortality and wisdom.

I draw UT Asriel with slightly heterochromatic eyes and didn't want to give up that detail, so I decided heterochromia just runs in Dandelion's family. Sage's right (viewer's left) eye is a warmer purple while his left (viewer's right) is a cooler purple, matching the positions of Dandelion's orange and blue eyes.

I don't plan on making Sage's parents actual characters, especially since they're dead and aren't any more relevant than UT or Swap MH Monster Kid's parents, but for what it's worth I did look up how royal titles work for a King's nephew and based on that, Sage's mother would've been Dandelion's sister.

Dandelion and Orchid took Sage in after his parents' deaths, his bed being put on the other side of his uncle's room. He got to know MK and later Frisk, considering them both cousins, but wasn't quite as close as they were to each other. He was distraught by their deaths too, though.

Despite not viewing himself as any older than 10, occasionally Sage likes to mention how long he's actually been alive for, just to see people's reactions when a small goat child says he's 113 years old.

I've given myself several headaches figuring out the timeline of all four kiddos, but I think it goes: - Sage was born - 4 years later, Monster Kid was born - 3 years later, Monster Kid was found and adopted by Dandelion and Orchid - 3 years later, Sage's parents died - 2 years later, Frisk fell into the Underground and was adopted (year 201X) - 1 year later, Monster Kid and Frisk died - 100 years later, Charity falls into the Underground (year 211X)

Since everyone has a different interpretation of both Frisk and Chara it's probably worth expanding on Charity's personality a bit more: Like my UT Frisk, Charity is more easily excitable than their UT counterpart and being kind comes a little more naturally to them, and they care deeply for their found family. But overall they're pretty similar to my UT Chara - sassy, fairly intelligent and mature for their age, but can be bitter and self-destructive at times. They lack UT Chara's way with words (i.e. narrator tendencies, that goes to Swap MH Frisk) and don't speak quite as formally. They also love gardening, dogs, anime and bad puns.

oh and I just now realised I should’ve written something about how Charity and Sage interact together, which generally similar to UT Chara and Asriel but with less dying from flowers and angry humans and more playful bickering over who’s actually the older one

Next up will be Napstabot and Happstablook, but I haven’t yet designed Napstabot’s box form so that needs to be done first :D;; but I fully intend to complete all the main character sheets this year!!

[chaos-family]

Backstory Masterdoc (in chronological order)

Credit to Anny for compiling this. 

TW for child abuse (physical and emotional), swearing, violence, blood mention, hospital, murder/death, implied panic attack, crying, arson mention, slight self negativity, neglect, alcohol abuse, hospitals, harassment, implied murder, violence mention, emotional distress/crying, manipulation, ab*se, implied s*xual feelings, repression, mention of abandonment, people going missing, crime mention, assassination mention

Oranges backstory: @orange-side-please-appear

Orange had an unremarkable life.

Xyr life followed a pattern. A cycle, if you will.

Get out of the house

Come back

Screams

Words that cut even before Orange knew the meaning to them

Pain

Then drowsiness 

And it repeated and repeated.

Get out of the house. Come back. Screams. Words. Pain. Drowsiness. Get out of the house. Come back. Screams. Words. Pain. Drowsiness. 

Xe met an animal with spikes. That was nice.

 Get out of the house. Come back. Screams. Words. Pain. Drowsiness. Get out of the house. Come back. Screams. Words. Pain. Drowsiness.

The neighbors asked xem to fill out some report. Xe never did get to do that before they were suddenly gone.

Get out of the house. Come back. Screams. Words. Pain. Drowsiness

And so on and so on.

And that was life. A cycle. A pattern. Something Orange knew even before xe knew xyrself.

There were days in xyr life. Good days, when they (could they even be called xyr parents?) grew bored of xem in the midst of the pain stage and went out with their painfully smelly bottles and small cylindrical white thingies they sometimes pushed against xyr skin.

There were middle days, where the smelly bottles would be thrown around and the white things would make marks under xyr hands.

Then there were the bad days.

Orange prefered not talking about them.

Today was like every other day. The cycle had continued its course. Orange had gone to visit the animal with spikes (who xe dubbed ‘Spiky’), xe had come home, there had been a fight xe couldn’t even bother to remember until the words were turned on xem. Then, there was pain.

And pain.

And pain.

And pain.

When would this stop? Was it gonna stay like this forever? Just the pain and numbness

Pain

Pain

Pain

The drowsiness never did come. It seemed like the cycle reversed and suddenly there was that white noise again, except different. Then, there was screaming again. That was weird.

Orange would have been bothered by the broken cycle if xe wasn’t so drowsy all of a sudden.

Then, there was nothing

~~~~

Orange wasn't sure what xe was supposed to do, stuck in the stuffy hospital. 

Everyone seemed to look at xem wherever xe went. It felt strange. Xe wasn't used to people looking  at xem for anything but…

Words. Scarring words and horrible insults. ‘Useless child’ 'you are better off dead’ ‘i wonder how your skin would look like burned. Probably better, you ugly freak’. Words long forgotten but still burned in xyr skin. Ugly. freak. Useless Child. 

Maybe it was better that xyr skin was burned. It felt familiar. 

“Oh what a poor child” the nurses said “. those burns will scar. Who would want to adopt xem”

..scars.

Xe could work with that

~~~~

Orange didn’t even notice the scars were why people didn’t want to adopt xem at first.

Xe wouldn’t have noticed them if they weren’t still flaming red and plastered all over xyr face, like a pattern. It was odd and unfamiliar and Orange didn’t like that.

Xe was in a big house with a bunch of other kids. An ‘orphanage’ xe was told. Xe was supposed to be ‘adopted’ from here.

Orange would much rather stay here.

It was like xe was perpetually in the ‘Get out of the house’ state. It was the best state, in xyr opinion, and xe wanted to stay there.

Xe didn’t want the cycle to repeat. xe didn’t want the words and the screaming and the pain and pain and pain.

Xe did want the drowsiness right about now, xe thought as xe idly scribbled in a corner. The other kids chatted with the potential parents while xe settled to xyr scribbling.

People came and went but xe felt disconnected to them all. None of them came too close, eyeing xyr mad scribbling and horribly noticeable scars.

Well, not all of them it seemed.

Someone walked towards xem. Xe looked at them, unsure what they were doing so close. Didn’t they see the scars? It was a very clear ‘stay away’ sign, the other kids had told xem.

“What do you have there?” They asked, trying to look at the paper. 

Maybe they expected some butterflies or a very pretty flower.

They likely weren’t expecting a drawing of a burning building with ‘WORLD DOMINATION’ scribbled in bright crayon. 

“.... Huh” They said.

And that was that.

~~~~~~

It wasn't, xe later found out.

The stranger had taken a liking to Orange for some reason. Xe walked away from the orphanage with nothing but a cardboard box with belongings. Or a porcupine and some paper, more accurately.

The other kids whispered as xe walked forward

‘Why is XE getting adopted’ a voice asked

‘This isn't fair’

And maybe it wasn’t.

But oh well

~~~~~

Orange would be lying if xe said xe wasn't just a bit spooked as xe walked inside the house.

It was very big, but mostly empty. Xyr new guardian (Who xe was told to call cenn) was.. Nice.

They didn't comment on xyr scars, which was a bit weird. They also did not have smelly bottles like they had. Mostly, it was quiet.

Xe was given a new room, which was far more bright and big than any room xe ever had.  It was empty, waiting to be filled by xem.

Spiky poked his head out of the box, looking at xem with the two mismatched eyes and the sparkling spikes.

Orange stared at the spikes and at the room. xe felt something missing.

Cold. it was cold.

Orange saw a candle in the nightstand

Cold. light it up. Hot hot hot.

Control.

Warmth

..home?

And even thought xe had to later go to buy a new nightstand because the other was reduced to ash and even thought xyr skin thumped with something

For the first time in xyr life, xe wasn't afraid.

Xe wasn't gonna be scared anymore

~~~~~~

Orange waited for the cycle. Xe waited and waited and waited for the pain until xe… forgot what xe was waiting for. 

~~~~

Orange Chaos stared at the burning tree house. Cenn was sighing exasperatedly behind xem. The lawyer was trying to charm the firefighters. Xyr siblings were all whooping or pouting at the tree house.The cryptid was eerily watching them. Spiky was fighting Patrick and…

Xe felt good.

Xe felt safe.

Xe looked around at the people xe loved and who loved xem. Xe looked at the ones who nicknamed xem Zuko and who listened to xem chatter on and on about xyr world domination plans and who cared about xem.

The cycle had ended. The pattern we’re gone.

But somehow, Orandge wasn’t scared of losing those anymore.

No, xe didn’t need them anymore.

Xe was home.

Spiky’s backstory:

Spiky wasn’t quite sure what he was.

Well, some might say, a porcupine.

But what porcupine could set fires? 

So Spiky wondered.

Unti, one day, there was a person. A person who would sit next to him and attempt to pet him, even with all his spikes. A person who would play with matches. A person who named him.

Then, he became a partner in crime. 

The first thing about being a partner in crime, Spiky realized, was that he was never alone anymore.

In the Before, he would sleep wherever he could find. Alleys, gutters, roofs.

In the After, he could go home- Before, he hadn’t even known what home meant.

And there was always that person- xe would talk to him, constantly filling up the space with an abundance of chatter and warmth.

He hadn't even realized it Before, but he had never felt warmth.

This person was warmth. Xe was the campfire, crackling and laughing and so, so, wonderful. 

And one day, xe was gone.

Spiky- he couldn’t think his name without flinching, that was what xe called him- went back to Before.

And then xe was back, but xe was different.

Xe had a scar over her left eye. 

Xe looked… sad.

When Spiky sparked, xe flinched.

He curled up alone that night.

)(*)(

When Spiky went back to the girl the next day, xe was smiling. Happy, (xe was smiling!) Spiky curled up next to her, watching her play with not-matches. 

He deflated a bit- xe didn’t want fire xe didn’t want fire xe didn’t want him- but stayed curled up next to her.

The next day, it was still not-matches. 

The next day, it was red not-matches. 

The next day, it was a glowing thing that looked like matches, but wasn’t- Spiky had tested it. And maybe broken it.

But it was okay, because the person laughed, and the next day, it was matches.

Spiky let out his sparks.

Cenn/Maxx/Logan’s backstory: @logan-please-smile-speaks

Maxx was immortal. At least that’s what they were told. Their family was of a high social standing, they figured that out early on. What, with all the people taking care of them instead of their parents and seeing all the other immortal children playing fun, risky games but not being allowed to join them because they were "different. They got noticeably more clumsy, but they claimed that wasn’t their fault. They were bored, they wanted friends, they didn’t have anyone to talk to.

Their parents didn’t like that and yelled at them for hours. It was the longest amount of time they’d been in the same room with their parents. After that, they were, broken to put it simply. They zoned out often and talked even less. They tried to not bother the staff as much as possible and they vowed they’d never repeat the words said to them that night to anyone.

Four months later, their parents went on a business trip and went missing. After 10 months without them returning, Maxx had to take over.

It wasn’t like Maxx cared, they barely knew the people. But now they needed to run everything their parents had left behind. And there was rumor of a traitor around that time which meant they could only depend on themself. 

So that’s what they did. It was a lot of work and they had many sleepless nights but they managed. They learned about energy drinks and became much more productive. They never asked their staff to do the work, instead doing it themselves since the staff dealt with the media and Maxx didn’t trust them.

When they were younger they’d overhear some of the staff members whispering about very incriminating subjects. Maxx never told anyone. They also never showed their face to the public, making everyone’s last memories of them being from when they were only a child. They did this because they knew they were going to leave one day. Not give up their rule, just explore the world, maybe adopt some children since they practically owned the law and everything else. 

They wanted people to talk to. They wanted people they could trust.

So, when they were old enough, they chose to leave, still promising to rule from wherever they went, and left.

One thing about their family is that the rule they held over everything was kept secret. Only selected and trusted officials are chosen, and if they are then they go through loyalty testing and have to say an oath. If information like that was to get out, an uproar would occur and Maxx would be a target for assasination. In short, it would be a disaster. 

So when Maxx chose a town near the cost of [Enter place here], they had to go tell all the officials in the area and make sure they were all sworn to secrecy. At first, they focused on working, they wanted to try and get ahead so they could go adopt. They decided to try a somewhat smaller house at first, and they'd size up if need be. 

Maxx knew they also weren't going to tell anyone who they were or that they were immortal. That could be saved for later. Much, much, later. Sometime after moving, they listen to a 'musical' named Hamilton and some memories resurfaced. Memories of signing the declaration and constitution. Not in the body they have now but one of the founding fathers. Did they write the law? They researched their family a bit more and, yeah, all of their ancestors were founding fathers and people of ruling houses. They didn't understand why they had memories from so long ago but they weren't too concerned.

Soon enough they had a day off, so they decided to adopt.

So Maxx got ready and went to the orphanage, they wanted someone who might have gone through things, like them, so they could help the child live a somewhat normal life. They wanted to help, to make the child's life easier. Which might be why when they got to the orphanage they were drawn to the kid in the back. 

The child was converted in scars and writing something on what looked like a huge stack of paper. Maxx was curious, so they went over to talk to the child. 

"Hey, what do you have there?" 

They don't know what they were expecting, but they definitely weren't expecting to see 'WORLD DOMINATION' in crayon. If they were at a full energy level they would've laughed but instead what they said was 

"....Huh"

After meeting some other children, they went to the matron and told her they wanted the kid in the back. The matron looked skeptical and asked if they were sure, which confused them but they said yes anyways. 

A few weeks later Maxx was called back to pick up the child, whose name, they learned was Orange. They were excited. They knew this was gonna be much different then anything they had ever done before. At first Orange was quiet and cautious, which makes sense. But as more children were brought in and xe found Spiky, xe warmed up to the family. Maxx was proud. After seeing how much Orange changed, they started helping and bringing in more children. 

It was a lot of work and the children could be exhausting at times but Maxx finally felt human. They felt like a normal person, even though they weren't. They loved it here. The only downside was that, they still had to run the world, basically. So late at night they'd be in the under area of their bed, typing away at laptops and writing out letters etc etc. They hated it but there was nothing they could do. They had to keep running everything until they disappeared. Thing is, if they disappeared they'd leave their family. Maxx could never, it would be cruel to take all these children in and then abandon them. 

So they stayed. 

Then they met River and helped out when they had lost their job. (You already know the business got told off later that week) But when River's family moved in, Maxx knew they'd need a bigger house. They got nervous though, they knew what house the family was going to move into but they were scared someone was going to ask where it came from. They never talked about their job! So if they just showed up having bought a huge house with presumably no money, people would ask questions. 

Eventually, they just decided to say it came from a relative. That worked somehow and the family kept growing, now with ghosts and cryptids and lawyers and therapists, and many, many, children. They didn't know how no one questioned the fact that they could commit crimes without consequence, but they weren't complaining. Maxx was having fun, they felt alive and they loved each and every person that was a part of their family. (/p) 

Even surrounded by all the love and happiness in their home, they always wondered where their parents were and if anyone would ever find out.

Ren/River’s backstory: @searching-for-the-frog-man

River sat on a bench, a book on their lap, scrolling through their spotify playlists. They had been doing this for about ten minutes and had yet to find an appropriate playlist for the setting. It was getting a little frustrating. “Hey!” A small child stood in front of them, distracting them from their extremely important (not) business.

“Hello?” They weren’t super used to having people just run up to them “what’s your name? Are you lost?” “No” they smiled in a mildly creepy manner “But my sister’s pet porcupine is” “Ah” It was one of those days “do you need help finding them?” “Yeah.” The kid nodded “turns out my parent doesn’t want to help” Understandable River thought 

“Okay, I’ll help you out” they thought for a second if this would be creepy, but before they could really put any thought into it, they were being dragged across the park “I think he’s in a tree” They pointed up at a big oak that stood in the center of the park River stood there for a minute before spotting an exasperated looking person on the other side of the park 

Before they could go talk to them another kid ran up and tugged on their sleeve

“What’s up?” she said, holding the largest stack of papers River had ever seen “have you found spiky yet?” “No” River looked at the paper “what’s that” “You’re nosy” the kid remarked “my name is orange, it’s nice to meet you” “I’m river”

“If you don’t tell cenn” Orange whispered “i’ll tell you what the papers are” “Okay?” the past five minutes were weird enough, and besides, River had no clue who cenn was anyway Orange flipped over the first page of the stack,

It read “world domination plans” “Oo-kay” River slowly backed away “good to know” It was then that Orange grabbed their arm and pulled them into the woods by the park 

______________________________________________________________________________

20 minutes later Maxx wandered into the woods to look for their kids only to find both children swordfighting with a random blue haired person

“Who the hell are you?” 

“Oh!” River tucked their sword behind their back “you must be their parent” “Yeah” they nodded “why are you swordfighting with my kids?” “Orandge is trying to take over the world” they pointed to the wide eyed child “so yup” “Okay, well thanks for stopping her”

“No problem” River laughed “funny thing- I came to this park to get away from my kids” “Oh?” “Yeah, they’re small chaos demons” They plucked a leaf out of their hair “but turns out I just found more” “Our kids should play together sometime” “That would be nice” ______________________________________________________________________________

River lost their job in march of the next year, and their house in may. “I don’t know what the hell I’m doing” They sat on the couch of Maxx’s house, tears in their eyes “or where I’m gonna go” “Have you told the kids yet?” “No.” River admitted “I don’t want to. I’m their parent. I’m not supposed to fail like this” “Nobody’s perfect” “Still. I can’t bear to tell them that I don’t know where we’re gonna live” “Ren?” one of river’s kids stuck her face around the corner “are you okay?” “I’m fine sweetie” River wiped their eyes “go play” “You could move in with us” Maxx said suddenly “What?” “Move in with us, bring the cats”

“Really?” “yeah” ______________________________________________________________________________

River and kids moved in on may 16th

They brought over their pets and soon the family was all together. They thought for a minute that all they really needed was just these five kids

They were wrong. Something told them (maybe the cryptid in the attic, maybe the lawyer in the chimney, something) that the story wasn’t over

And so every time there was a hurt kid, every time someone was abandoned, every time a crying child wound up on their doorstep, they took them in. And the inside of the house was warm and happy and safe

And even if the neighbors thought they were weird, even if River’s extended family refused to visit, it was still home. And it was still full of love.

March’s backstory: @bewaretheidesofmarchyall

[being written]

Green’s backstory: @janus-come-back-to-us (wip)

Green, or as you better know her, the unlawful lawyer, lived a mundane life, at first. A stereotypical mother and father, both prestigious lawyers who went to yarvard university. Both prominent names in the world of law, both excellent in their careers. 

  At least, that’s what Green had learned. 

 When she was five, her parents took her to her first court case— her father versus someone else, she couldn’t remember the name. All she knew was that they had burned much of the city’s property, and he’d father had to show that they were guilty. Simple enough, wasnt it? They were already known as an arsonist, so what would be so difficult about it? 

 But then, the defendant pulled out colorful wads of paper— shs didn’t recognize it, but the courtroom did. Her parents, especially, their faces draining of color at the sight. 

  The judge’s eyes lit up behind their glasses, leaning on the edge of their seat as the defendant strutted up to them, a confident smirk on his face. 

 “Monopoly money?” Her mother hissed under her breath, her hold on Green’s hand deathly tight, “that’s— where did they—?”

  “Momma?” The toddler asked, because what was monopoly?? Why was father’s head in his hands? Why did the defendant look so smug, so sure of himself? 

 Her mother only shushed her, somehow squeezing her hand tighter, but that didn’t erase Green’s questions. If anything, it encouraged them, spurred them on until they were all she could think about.

 The only other thing she registered, before zoning out once again, was the judge and jury declaring the defendant innocent. Innocent— as if those fires just magically appeared! As if there were no worries about fixing the property— of possible injuries— of anything!! 

 After the tense car ride home, the little toddle ran upstairs to her room. The billion books that lined her walls— she hadn’t read up on many of them, in all honesty, because the only ones she could reach were on the bottom shelves, all filled with fairytales and fables that taught her nothing. 

  So, she climbed. As if she was merely a monkey in a jungle, she kicked her tiny legs up and climbed the many shelves. She fumbled, faltered, nearly fell in the loneliness of her room, but miraculously made it to the highest shelf. 

 Where her parent’s court records were. Where the knowledge of the law was. Where a whole board game was (seriously, why was there a board game?).

 It took her all night, around twelve hours, really, but by the end of it, she was a much smarter kid. 

  For one, Green learned that her parents… weren’t really that good. They just knew how to drag on conversations without looking suspicious, and they knew how to seem trustworthy, so much so that their rivals could have all the evidence in the world, but her parent’s charisma would always win out. They hardly ever mentioned the law in most of these, actually, they were just court jesters!! Playing a fool, entertaining the Royal judge, making his advisories, the jury, chuckle in good faith, ruling in favor of her family. 

 Secondly, the law was horrendously stupid. Crimes of higher evil weren’t punished for as long as little white crimes. Flimsy evidence could win against the truth. Corruption littered every surface of the courtroom, from shady deals with the jury, to the judge having immediate biases with no reason… it was unlawful, in every sense of the word. 

 Lastly, and probably the most egregious thing she learned… monopoly wasn’t just some measly board game, not just some family fun. No, it was the biggest scam of the century. The court held these colorful dollars to such a high regard, higher than they held the victims of cases. “Get out of jail” cards were waved around as an easy bail. Owning miniature green and red buildings was considered a genuine source of income!! As if!!

 All of this fraud, all of this deception in the very rules of society… Green realized what she had to do. 

 She had to become a lawyer who was so awful at her job, that it would unmask how horrendous the whole system was. 

 Maybe a bit extreme for a five year old to think, but this is a fix for the chaos family, what did you expect?

  For the next several years, Green studied about the law as much as she could. Her excuse was just “following in her parents’ footsteps,” but anyone who she was close to would know that’s a lie. 

 So thankfully, she wasn’t close to anyone. 

 She ended up going to Yarvard University— a prestigious, peculiar, picky school— and her whole course on law… was very lackluster, to say the least. It was merely a video of very similar looking men, flirting in a courtroom (did one of them have scales?). But, for some reason, the quick quiz and test she took after (and, of course, passed with flying colors), was enough to earn her a degree in law. Splendid. 

Callisto’s backstory: @where-is-the-morningstar

[being written]

Anny’s backstory: @awkward-pics-of-john

[being written]

Samir’s backstory:  @bring-back-the-sides-onesies

Samir had always felt left out. Her parents didn’t love each other anymore, one would tell a story that the other would say wasn’t true, and she would be stuck in the middle. Sam was maybe 5 when they stopped living together. Every Wednesday, she would go to her father's house, stay there till Saturday when she would go back to her mother. Sometimes her Dad had people over that she didn’t know, sometimes he played music for her, sometimes he made custard.

Her Mum didn’t do much. She always seemed tired, like she didn’t want Sam around, or that she was too much trouble. She was rarely clean at her mother’s house, which her father didn’t like. They used to argue a lot. Yelling and banging that would scare Sam, make her hide under her bed and wish for it to stop.

It was one of those nights. She was 10 now, her father come over to confront her mother about how she was being treated. They were yelling again. She hid, beneath blankets and with pillows and stuffed animals. Especially her stuffed ‘devils. The loud wouldn’t go away, she knew. So, wrapping herself in blankets and picking up her devils, she shoved some clothes, all just a bit small for her, into her school bag and opened the window. Using the bed as leverage, she climbed out of the window, tears welling in her eyes as she landed in the bush outside.

It was prickly, and sticks kept on almost poking her eyes. Sam looked around, before choosing one end of the street to walk up, hugging the blankets around herself, and holding her tasmanian devil stuffies close to her. It was late, starting to get dark, and Sam knew that the dark meant she might get in trouble. Mum and Dad had always told her not to go outside when the dark was here, that bad people would try and take her away.

Sam thought that maybe that was better than staying there.

There was a park near where she lived. It had a swing and a slide and some climbing areas. It was fenced off, but Sam had never been there before. Mum said that kids who did bad things went there to talk to their friends.

Placing her bag on the ground, and her blankets on top of them, she reached up to open the gate, so she could stay there for awhile. There were wood-chips on the ground though, so it might not be a great idea since she was barefoot.

Sitting down on her bag and blankets, Sam hugged her stuffies, tears finally falling down her cheeks. She was cold, and scared, and didn’t know where to go. People around here were rarely nice, but no one would want to help a scruffy, filthy nuisance such as herself.

Picking up her bag and blankets again, Sam began to wander. It was gloomy now, her tummy empty, so she stopped at a road. There was a shop across it, but the road was there, and it scared her. Her Dad had taught her to always look both ways, but it was dark, and her eyes hurt. 

So when all was quiet, she dashed across, making it safely across. She stood silently at the door, before jumping to try and get the scanner to see that she was there, and let her in. Eventually someone walked out, so she dashed in, looking around the inside of the store as she did.

It was empty. The people at the registers seemed barely awake, and the only sound she could really hear was the faint chattering of several people, most higher-pitched than what a usual adult would sound like. Sam hurried towards the sound, curious to know what the sound was. Turning into one of the aisles, she saw three or four children, seemingly around the same age as herself. There was an adult with them, but their back was turned. Sam watched them for a while, watched as they talked together. 

One of them, a short one with burns over her face and arms, turned to see Sam, to which the child ducked out of view, hugging her stuffies tightly. She had always typically been a shy, isolated child.

The child walked out of the aisle, followed by one other, looking over at Sam. She waved to her, which Sam responded with a small wave in return. The other two children soon appeared, followed by the adult. They had shoulder length brown hair, and were wearing a blue top and a grey skirt. 

“Hey kid, are you lost?” They asked softly, crouching in front of Sam. She shook her head, looking down and hugging her stuffies close to her.

“Hiding?” They prompted a response, trying to look into Sam’s eyes. She began to cry again, hiding her face in her blanket and stuffies. 

“I-I r-ran a-a-away-” Sam sniffled, still keeping her face hidden. The adult sat down in front of Sam, silent for now. “T-they kept on figh-fighting and i-i didn’t wanna-” Sam went quiet as the adult leaned forward and brought them into a hug, two or three of the other children joining in. Because hugs are amazing.

“Come on, let’s get you something to eat, then we’ll see about finding your house, ok?” The adult spoke softly to Sam, who nodded, hugging her stuffies tightly. “For now, tell me about your teddies. What are their names?” Sam rubbed at her eyes, before responding with a meek ‘Devi and Tali’. 

“Those are pretty names! Come on, let’s go choose out a small treat for you to have.” The adult stood up, holding onto Sam’s hand as they went to the checkout. “Orange, Anny, Calli, can you take her to the chocolates or the treats to get something? Keep it small,” The adult said, smiling encouragingly.

“Ok Cenn!” Said one, as three of the children, the one with the burns, one wearing some sort of fake suit, and one with a blue top, led Sam to one of the aisles. Her eyes widened as she looked around, before picking up one of the bars, almost dropping her stuffies in the process. 

She knelt down to pick up her stuffies, before looking at the other children.

“My name’s Samir..” She said quietly, before standing up again.

“I’m Orange! That’s Callisto, and that’s Anny.” The burnt one spoke, a grin on her face. “And that was Cenn, Eryn was with them. They adopted all of us! There are more of us at home, and Ren’s there too! They’re our other parent.” Orange explained.

“Is it happy?” Sam asked quietly. Anny nodded.

“It sounds nice..” Sam smiled softly, before rubbing some of the dirt off of her face, bundling her blanket tighter around herself as she walked back over to Cenn and Eryn. “Why don’t you have any shoes on?” Calli asked, looking sideways at Sam, who went red.

“I climbed out my bedroom window. My shoes were in the hallway, I didn’t want Mum and Dad to see me.” Sam said quietly.

“You’re all dirty too. Do you live in a mud house?” Anny asked jokingly, causing Sam to giggle.

“No, Mum’s usually just a bit busy. I’m cleaner when i’m at Dads though.” Sam explained.

“Mum and Dad don’t live together anymore, otherwise i’d probably be clean all the time. She doesn’t have much time for me, and Dad tries his best but he gets busy as well.” Sam sighed, looking down.

“I ran off because they were arguing though, it always feels louder than it actually is, like… like it’s a big group of elephants all running towards me, except it’s their arguing and shouting and hitting things.” Sam squeezed her stuffies closer to her, before looking up again.

“It was all cold and dark outside and Dad said that the dark is bad, so I came here, cause I thought it’d be warm. Then I met you!” Sam finished off her explanation, Cenn looking on from the sidelines with a confused face.

“Do you know your address?” They asked. Sam thought for a moment, before nodding. “Good. We’ll drive by there, and I’ll go talk to your mother and father, if they’re still around. You might have to go back, but if you don’t and they agree to put you up for adoption, then you can join our family.” Cenn nodded slightly before placing Sam’s chocolate on the conveyor, waiting to pay for their groceries. Orange was vibrating with excitement, whilst Anny was bouncing and Calli was nodding subtly. Eryn stood still beside Cenn, hugging their left leg.

Cenn finished paying, carrying the grocery bags out to the car, unlocking it as they went. Callisto went and sat in the front seat, whilst Eryn and Anny helped Sam get into the very back, Orange sitting in the middle (it’s a van-type car).

“What’s the address?” Cenn asked Sam, who stuttered before quietly muttering a street name and number. Cenn nodded, opening up their phone to get google maps directions to said address. 

“Buckle up, buttercups.” Cenn called, waiting to hear the clicks of the belts, which they soon did. Nodding to themselves, they pulled out of the carpark, heading to the address that Sam had told them.

Sam was looking out the window, hugging Tali and Devi. Anny sat beside her, Eryn on Anny’s other side and seemingly half asleep.

“Uhhh… Kids, stay here, i’ll be back..” Cenn stopped the car, hopping out quickly and locking it behind them. Sam shied away from the window, hugging her knees to her chest. Police surrounded the house, her father being dragged away, yelling and handcuffed. Blood spattered his shirt.

An ambulance was there too. They were loading a body on a stretcher into the back, blood soaking the sheets that covered it. The doctors were yelling orders at each other, trying to keep whoever it was alive. Cenn was talking to one of the policepeople, trying to figure out what had happened.

With a sigh, Cenn walked back to the car and got back in. “Sam, honey, you’re gonna come stay with us for tonight, ok? There’s been a bit of trouble, that’s all.” Sam nodded, looking down as they drove off.

Cenn had taken her to their home. It was big. She’d been shown to an empty room, then given a bath so she would be clean, and had her hair brushed. Then she’d gone to bed.

Sam didn’t see her father ever again. He was sent to court and then convicted for Second degree murder of her mother. Cenn decided to adopt her when they all found out, so now this was her home.

She was happy here, at least. So Sam stayed. She kept quiet, she kept mostly to herself, but she did love them and was grateful for what Cenn had done.

And terrified of what might have happened to her if she had been there when it happened.

Rina’s backstory: @really-awkward-pics-of-talyn

She wasn’t sure why she liked it there. It was a “family” of her own, maybe that’s why. Ven and Yosh would act as everyone’s parents. Minty, Immy, Adriana, and Syd were her older siblings; Slimey, Derppo, Mimi, and Leon as the younger ones. They all had something in common; that’s why they were a family.

Fighting.

No, they never really fought.

They just liked watching it happen.

Rina had to leave. Time passed and she lost touch with those older siblings. She couldn’t find them in this jumbled mess of a mansion (which she had somehow come up with). It was an unfair system, where the higher rank gave you a better-quality room. Of course, this meant the parents had a pretty high quality of living while her younger siblings were all stuck sharing a room.

Just like she had written in that story of hers.

“Rina, this is cute, but… when do we get to see your parents’ representation here?”

“Sorry, Ven, I can’t. It goes against the story’s system. Besides, Don is in a lower rank, and even if he was there, they still wouldn’t-” she caught Ven’s glare and nodded. “...Okay.”

She glanced outside and saw Syd pack her bags. She rushed outside, only to have Yosh stop her.

It felt like Yosh had some unspoken negative feelings about her, seeing as they both liked the same character. It felt like Rina wasn’t allowed to do that, even though Ven, Adrianna, and Slimy shared a favorite. Syd and Derppo shared a favorite. Minty, Immy, Mimi, and Leon were the only ones who liked their certain characters (give or take the fact that there was someone outside the “family” who shared with Leon).

“Yosh…”

“Come back inside. Don’t follow her.” Yosh pushed the smaller girl back inside.

“But… Syd…” Rina looked back at one of her closest friends in the group.

“Nah, she’s fine. She’s fine, let’s just… Not talk about her anymore, okay?”

Rina nodded, a tad bit uncomfortable.

“What’s all this?” Yosh picked up Rina’s notebook.

“Oh, you see, I’m really into idol anime, so-”

“Fine, but keep it to yourself. No one else.”

Rina had to leave. Things were getting worse in the household. Rina knew Minty and Adrianna were still there but couldn’t get a hold of them. Immy seemed to fade without a trace. As for the “younger siblings,”...

She heard what she considered to be “no-no noises” and laughter. Derppo and Leon were poking fun at Slimey for being, well, something for her favorite. Rina shuddered at the thought. Slimey was about the same age as her at that time, but for someone to feel something like that for a character that was nine years older than them was not a very pleasant thought.

Rina went back to her room (being the middle child meant she got to choose where she wanted to go, so she obviously shared the apartment-type room with the older siblings) and opened up an empty notebook. She took a marker and scribbled a face similar to her own on the page. She held it up to her face.

“Rina-chan board says, ‘smile,’” she said, mimicking her namesake, Rina Tennoji.

Rina continued to use the board, hiding her face and her feelings from the parents of the household. She was the only one left from the “first half” of the children, and seeing how much things had changed shocked her. Every day, behind the smiling notebook, was either a blank stare or a sad expression (which still felt empty).

She’d lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling. If the ceiling wasn’t in sight, it was the smiling sketch on top of her actual face, which would be covered in tears. Why did it have to be that way? Now that she was the oldest child there, did she want to stay? She wasn’t used to those “parents” being pushy and manipulative. They didn’t even have the parent role in the first place; it had belonged to the real veterans of the group (who, like the older siblings, were nowhere to be seen).

Rina had to leave.

Finally, they convinced themselves to pack their bags. Inhale. Exhale. Let the family light itself on fire, they didn’t care. They just needed to be somewhere else.

At this point in time, they had gotten used to the notebook. They got used to holding a straight face. Rina looked back to the old building. It started to fall apart. Just like in the story, which was deleted. Was she the only “normal” one there? Of course she was. The only ones left there were either extremely manipulative or horny. There was no sense of normalcy there. Unless you were talking about Rina.

It really was best for them to leave. That experience left them blank and expressionless. More faces had been drawn in their notebook. The first smile from months ago, a more excited smile, a face of worry, one of anger, one of embarrassment… the list went on. All of this because they were told to keep things to themselves. They were told to have the same exact mindset as those “parents” who ran the show.

But they didn’t want to, so they left. They had no particular place in mind, and nowhere to go to. They’d been walking further and further away from the mansion until they felt like they couldn’t move anymore.

“Middle of the woods, huh…?” Their lips curved up for a split second before they set their bag down. “I don’t have a problem with that.” They took out their phone and listened to a song or two that they knew well.

Right. They wanted to be an idol. That dream had been pushed away from them by their “parents.” A second notebook, along with a pencil, was pulled out of their bag.

“What should I finish?” they asked themselves, looking at their English translyrics. Of course. Color of Heart, a song about hiding one’s true self behind a mask. A song where smiles were just meaningless lies.

This song fit them. After the manipulation, they didn’t want to be themselves anymore. After jotting down some more lyrics, they cleaned up a bit and hoisted one of the bag’s straps over their shoulder. And they sang. They went down the road and sang as they did so, their headphones playing the music.

The smell of fire snapped them out of their thoughts. They panicked (enough to almost drop their board) and ran out to stop it. That is, until they saw the kids around it, laughing.

“Did you… Set this on fire?” they asked, staring at the burning treehouse. The kids there nodded. Rina caught their own feeling of shock and held up their board (notebook). “Where are your parents?”

One of the kids pointed off to an adult nearby. “Cenn’s over there, Ren was around earlier.” Rina walked towards the adult they assumed to be Cenn.

“Cenn…?” Rina glanced towards the burning treehouse.

“That’s fairly normal for them.”

“I’ll go get a fire extinguisher or a hose or… something else to put it out.” It was then when Rina realized they were being… weird, compared to the other kids. But that was fine with them.

“What’s your name, by the way?”

“Rina. Noticed the fire while I was running from- I mean, just on my way to-”

“Running away?”

“From a toxic ‘family,’” they said, flipping to a worried page. “I wanted to get away from there, came across here…” Their eyes widened, feeling a hand patting their head.

“I don’t know if you’d find this better, but Ren and I are always open to adding new members to the family.”

Rina nodded. “I like this better…” While they began to flip through the notebook to a smile, they heard someone else approach.

“What’s the notebook for?” Ren asked, looking at the board.

“Expressions. I usually have a blank face.”

“You’re smiling, though,” Ren remarked, looking at Rina, who had put the board down.

Rina’s smile grew a little bigger, and she let her cuteness take over. “You guys don’t mind if I stay here?”

“Not at all.”

Rina giggled to herself, and said something she didn’t expect to say. “Rina-chan says, ‘smile’!”

Curt’s backstory: @wheresvirgilsspidercurtainstho

Curt's hoodie was special to them. 

It made them feel protected. 

Like they were safe. 

The reason?

Well, we'd have to go far back for that. 

~~~~~

To say Curt's biological family wasn't the best would be an understatement. They didn't care about their child at all, often forgetting they existed on good days. They didn't want Curt to exist and they made it clear to them every day of their life for around a decade. 

Sometimes verbally telling them wasn't enough and they'd leave physical reminders of it, bruises, cuts, broken bones, etc.

They still have the burn scar from a particularly bad day along their stomach. 

One day, their 'parents' had an argument. 

A loud one. 

It turned physical. 

Curt remembers watching as their 'mother' snapped, grabbed the nearby kitchen knife and plunged it into their 'father''s heart. They remember the scream of pain. They remember the blood. They remember the expression on their 'mother''s face. They remember the moment when their 'mother' realised they were watching from the stair bannister. They remember running, scared for their life. Hiding in a wardrobe. They remember their 'mother' yelling "YOU LITTLE BITCH WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?!" They remember not being able to breathe, their throat closing up. The shaking. The pure terror. The warm tears running down their face. 

Their 'father''s scream wasn't quiet. A neighbour heard, got concerned and called 999 (or 911 depending on where you live ig). That's the only reason Curt didn't die in that house that reeked of alcohol and bad memories. They got there before their 'mother' had a chance to kill them. 

The ride to the hospital. 

It felt like the longest ride in their entire life. 

It was too loud. 

But also too quiet. 

Everything felt wrong. 

It all reeked of that metallic smell. 

They couldn't get the image of their 'father''s face before he died. 

The yelling. 

The fear. 

The fear. 

Before they knew it, they were at the hospital building. 

It was too crowded. 

Too many people. 

Too bright. 

The next half an hour was basically just a blur.

Curt had to sit in the waiting room, since for plot purposes, the hospital was busy. 

They had a cup of water in their hands-how'd that get there?-but they couldn't stop shaking violently. 

A thing-person-that snapped them out of their thoughts. 

"Hi, are you okay? There's water on your face-" The voice said. 

Curt jumped at the voice before looking up. A pair of brown eyes behind glass stared back. The person was wearing a black jumper but was holding another piece of clothing. 

"Sorry if I annoyed you or anything I was just kind of worried and I'm sorry!" The person said, growing more and more nervous as they continued to speak. 

"...I-i'm fi- no, wait. T-that's probably a lie. I don't even k-know anymore…" Curt said quietly, stuttering a bit and not even knowing what to say. 

"Well uh… here! You look cold and if you want… I can give you a hug too? That usually helps me!" As they said that, they handed them the clothing item in their hands. 

Curt blinked in confusion. "t-this is yours though…"

"Well uh, if you don't want it then you don't have to but it's just a hoodie, I don't need it!" The person smiled. 

Curt put the hoodie one. It gave them a small bit of comfort. It was warm and the hoodie had cat ears patterned with stars. It was the best thing they'd ever received. 

They accepted the offer of the hug. 

That was the first time they'd ever been hugged. 

Even more crying happened. 

The person's name was Sam, they were at the hospital because another person, called Orange (who was Sam's sibling), got burnt because of arson gone wrong. 

Sam's family was so loud. But not overbearingly. It was comforting. Was this a real family? One that loved and supported you? They were lucky. 

Sam didn't mind if Curt didn't know what to say or stuttered. She was kind and her family were one of the first ones to show Curt any kindness. 

It couldn't last though, right?

After all, Curt still had to live somewhere. 

And that's when a social worker finally turned up, claiming that she was going to take Curt to an orphanage since their 'mother' was going to prison and their 'father' had died earlier that night. 

The almost safe feeling they felt disappeared. "u-uh.. Bye Sam, Sam's f-family." They said quietly. 

"Can't they stay with us?" Anny, another person part of the family, said. Curt would be lying if that sentence hadn't caused hope they didn't think was possible. 

"Cenn would probably say-"

"Please, please, please!" Pleaded Callisto, another part of the family. 

"I don't know what you're on about but let us do it Ren!" A new voice said loudly. The owner of that voice had burns on their face and a bandage on their arm. 

"Orange!"

"Hi Anny! And hi new person!"

Their Ren sighed. "Well, we'll just threaten to commit arson to the house again if Cenn isn't okay with it."

There were happy noises from everyone else. 

Curt was honestly shocked that anyone could ever want them in their life but they weren't going to complain. 

There was a lot of paperwork and it's a surprise that they even let Curt come home that night but that was the best night's sleep Curt ever received. 

And that hoodie became a reminder that maybe someone did want them after all. 

Local Family Cryptid’s backstory:  @where-is-elliot-come-home-please

[being written]

Xael’s Backstory: @awkward-pics-of-critic-and-crew (i just put this here since i don’t know where it is chronologically lakjd)

Xael had always liked swimming. I suppose her name was an indicator to any who knew what it meant; “from the sea”.

So her meeting her new family after almost drowning was interesting.

Her parents were… ok. Her parents were never together, but they weren’t angry at each other. They were on good terms, agreeing to co-parent their child. It worked, for a while.

Until they died.

They were on their way to Xael’s school, for a parent-teacher meeting, when a truck came out of nowhere. Struck their car, killed them on impact. She was upset, naturally. When she was put in the orphanage, she didn’t make many friends. None she kept anyways.

Eventually, she got new parents.

Her new adults were awful. She refused to call them her parents. That’s all she said about them at the start. They liked to yell, and sometimes things got broken. Xael was scared that she might get angry like them too.

They didn’t always pay attention to her either. Sometimes she had to make her own food and get herself ready for bed because they just weren’t bothered. She adjusted to this.

One day, her adults decided to drive out to the beach. Xael could read the weather forcast; they knew it was gonna be bad weather later. They hesitantly brought this up.

“Oh, shush. Either you come with us or stay here alone for the day.”

Xael didn’t wanna stay alone, even though those adults weren’t much better. So they got in the car.

At the beach, Xael sat still for a while. Eventually, she went to swim in the sea while her adults drank a weird red drink. It reminded her of blood. She wasn’t sure how to feel about that.

She wore ear plugs while she swam. Weird, but she already had bad balance, and watery ears don’t help with that. So she swam, just doing her own thing. She didn’t realise when it started raining, she was already wet.

She noticed when thunder struck nearby.

She stopped, taking out one earplug and looking around. Nobody else was swimming anymore. The sky was grey, almost pitch black. She was very far away from the shore.

‘I should get back.’ She thought.

She couldn’t see anyone on the beach anymore. Anyone.

Where were her adults?

She started swimming back, only for a particularly large wave to brush her aside and under the water. She let out a startled yelp. Water flooded her mouth, almost choking her.

She was panicking.

The next few moments felt like a blur. All she remembered was coughing and sputtering as she was tossed around the water, rain pouring and thunder cracking.

And eventually, she just let her eyes close.

Her adults clearly didn’t care if she wasn’t there, they’d already left.

Maybe she’d see her real parents soon.

Well, she didn’t wake up to her parents.

She coughed as she opened her eyes. She realised she was in a car. No, a van. Looking to her left, she noticed a kid staring at her, with scars and burns on xyr face. She thought they were interesting. Orange, xyr name was.

“Oh, they’re not dead. Huh.” The kid said.

“Oh, they’re awake!” A different kid chimed in the row ahead of them. She noticed a stuffed animal sticking out of the chair, which she learned later belonged to Sam. There were other kids in the van too. Somehow, she knew she wasn’t being kidnapped. Nobody was panicking.

Xael coughed another time or two, trying to clear the last of the water from her throat. “Huh..?” Was all she said at the start.

“Cenn! They’re awake!” Another kid called. Eryn. She liked these names.

“Oh! Let me pull over…” They stopped the car, pulling over to the curb. They turned to see Xael.

“Are you ok?”

How long had it been since she’d heard that?

“…I think so. Where am I?” She usually tries to be polite, but at that moment she was confused.

“Ah, this is our car. We found you washed up on the beach nearby and wanted to make sure you were ok.”

Right. The beach. Adults left.

“They left…” she muttered.

“Hm? Sorry, what was that?”

“My adults… they left without me.”

She wasn’t attached to those people. She really wasn’t. So why did she feel upset?

“Your adults? You mean, your parents?”

“Not really. They’re bad parents, I think. Did I drown?” She was really just hopping between topics, huh?

“Oh- no, you’re ok. Do you have a way of getting in contact with your pa- adults?”

“No. Don’t wanna.”

“That’s ok. Well, for now, would you like to come stay with us?” Cenn asked. Xael perked up a bit. So did Orange.

“Another partner in crime?” Xe asked. Xael wondered what that meant.

“Do I have to keep making my food?” She asked.

“What? No, what age are you even- nevermind. No, the older people in the house make the food. The kids are kids.” Cenn replied.

She didn’t have to take care of herself constantly. Others could help.

“Mm… that sounds nice…"

She could feel herself getting tired. For once, she let herself doze off. She enjoyed naps.

She was hoping she’d have more in the future.

[shlabam]

ALL OF CYCLOPS’ CHILDREN, RANKED

Despite being fairly young and a very active planet-saving adventurer/ crusader for mutant rights, Cyclops has managed to father a significant number of children. Sure, all of them hail from alternate futures, many of which have been erased due to the actions of Scott Summers himself, but his DNA has traveled through space and time to create, in one way or another, ten different humans throughout the Marvel Multiverse. And now, because it’s the internet, they will be ranked by coolness. Feel free to become furious in the comments. [Note: this article only discusses characters who were directly descended from Cyclops’ DNA. No adoptees, grandchildren, or in-laws, just his direct kids.]

9-10 (tie): Charles and Jeanette Summers (Millennial Visions)

Somebody’s gotta be at the bottom. These tykes only exist on one page of X-Men: Millennial Visions, a one-shot where various artists showed their ideas for what the X-Men would look like in the new millennium. One artist apparently thoughts the coolest possible idea would be for a lull in villain activity, allowing Scott and Jean to settle down and have a couple kids. Charles and Jeanette rank at the bottom of this list for having no discernible powers, as well as very lazy names. (Really? You’re gonna name them after your most important mentor, and yourself, but with an -ette on the end? Think outside the box, Red.)

6-8 (tie): Alex and the Twins (X-Men: The End)

In the alternate world of X-Men: The End, Scott and Emma Frost have four children. The oldest is later on this list, but these three duds gotta come up first, seeing as they have no traits, and two of them don’t even have names. It’s implied that they have powers and have been trained in unarmed combat, but with all their appearances being in the background and no lines of dialogue, they can’t hold a candle to the children of Cyclops who affect the worlds around them. Plus, you can’t fool me: those twins are just two spare Stepford Cuckoos with drawn-on freckles. Come on!

5: Megan Summers (X-Men: The End/ GeNext)

Megan Summers, the oldest of Scott and Emma’s children from X-Men: The End, suffers from underexposure. She mostly exists as a prop for Scott and Emma to agonize over, such as when she is kidnapped by Mister Sinister. However, as she grows into her powers (fairly potent telepathy), she enters a relationship with Oliver Raven (son of Rogue and Gambit) and joins his team GeNext, the next generation of X-Men. In another universe, she could have had her own title and adventures, but the short run of GeNext leaves most of her stories untold.

4: X-Man

Nate Grey, created by Mister Sinister using Cyclops and Jean Grey’s DNA in the alternate timeline Age of Apocalypse, could have ranked higher on this list if it was still the 90s. However, as we move further and further from his relevance, we are forced to examine his contributions to the Marvel Universe after his arrival in the main timeline: had the ego to call himself X-Man (yikes), had the ego to call himself the Shaman of the Mutant Tribe (double yikes), lost a lot of his powers in combat with the Sugar Man (what a loser), and lately has function as more of an antagonist to the team from which he took his name. Sure, he has his fans, but it’s hard to relate to a character this powerful. Bonus points for his initial escape from the Age of Apocalypse: stabbing Apocalypse’s son with a chunk of the M’Kraan Crystal. That’s some Final Fantasy ish.

3: Ruby Summers

Hailing from the same future as Bishop, Ruby acts as one of the figureheads for the Summers Rebellion, a mutant uprising to campaign for mutant rights in a world where they’re frequently held in internment camps. Another potential offspring of Scott and Emma Frost, Ruby is also the only one of Scott’s children to not exhibit telepathic powers, instead inheriting her father’s optic blasts and her mother’s invulnerable gemstone form. Additionally, she can retain her ruby form for any amount of time, granting her immortality (she looks to be in her 20s but is actually over 80 years old). Despite being interesting enough for her own series (or at least membership in a team book), Ruby only appears in a single arc in Peter David’s X-Factor, leaving much of her story untold. However, she gets points docked by being romantically linked with time-traveling serial killer and all-around grease-stain Trevor Fitzroy. Ew.

2. Cable

The most successful of Cyclops’ children, and also the only one he had intentionally. Born of Scott and his first wife Madelyne Pryor (who was a clone of Jean, so he’s kinda Jean’s kid, too), little Nathanial Summers was born with incredible mutant potential, but an infection with a techno-organic virus caused him to be pulled 2,000 years into the future where his condition could be treated. Since then, he’s traveled back and forth to the future, led scores of teams, fought Apocalypse, fought Mister Sinister, fought his own clone Stryfe, raised the first mutant born after M-Day, got fused with Deadpool, was portrayed in film by Josh Brolin, and currently exists in a younger form alongside the X-Men on the mutant utopia Krakoa. And despite all these incredible accomplishments and iconic character design, Cable just couldn’t plug in to the number one spot on this list.

1. Rachel Grey

The original, still the best. Rachel Summers has everything you want in a Cyclops offspring. Telepathic and telekinetic powers? Check. Hails from a post-apocalyptic future? Check, the world of Days of Future Past. Traumatic backstory? She was a literal slave trained to track down and kill other mutants as one of Ahab’s Hounds. Member of many teams? X-Men, Excalibur, Starjammers, and the current X-Factor, just to name a few. However, what sets her apart is her intentional iconoclastic views with her father. She adopts her dead mother’s alias, changes her last name to be closer to her, and, despite potentially having the same earth-shattering powers as her “siblings” Cable and X-Man, manages to keep it all under control, as well as occasional flirtations with the Phoenix Force. A genuine boss, a class above the rest. However, there’s another Summers son that can’t be discounted.

0. unnamed baby of Scott and Jean (X-Men: Millennial Visions)

Despite only appearing on one page of the same one-shot referenced at the beginning of this list, the sheer number of questions generated by this single illustration are innumerable. Why is this the only Cyclops kid to get both Scott and Jean’s powers? How is it possible for a baby to tap into their X-Gene at such a young age? Did Xavier design that X-Diaper, knowing the child would be the youngest member of his paramilitary force? (Eat that, 13-year-old Kitty Pryde!) This baby is everything Charles and Jeanette aren’t: potent, captivating, adorable, and lacking a first name. Give him a cinematic universe before he stops being cute.

[valkerymillenia]

Umbrella Academy

season 2, episode 4

New episode, new post!

This was the other post I had written out that got accidently deleted so I'm writing it all again.

1993? And Lila was 4? TOO MUCH COINCIDENCE! I still stand by my theory that Lila is one of the 43.

Yes, she has a father but that could just be her mother's husband. It's just too coincidental that the show would make her exactly the same age as the Hargreeves for no reason.

Ah the red heels. Hi Handler. These heels are really pretty though, very wicked witch with the ruby slippers. Even that outfit kind of screams wicked witch meets Cruella de Vil 😏

Kill parents, adopt child. Interesting MO, Handler. Like an evil Bruce Wayne (does this make Handler Owlman? I know, I'm not funny).

Oh, Handler pulling a Reginald with Lila!

Except, you know, she actually gives Lila positive reinforcement and affection, unlike Reggie. But her training seems just as brutal and inhumane for a child (and possibly even more violent) as Reginald's...

It's curious and interesting, a nice foil. Handler succeeds where Reggie fails- creating a loyal and effective soldier will into adulthood- because she was willing to give the kid affection and compassion. Reggie saw himself as some sort of hero creating heros but he failed at the most basic and human thing that even the villain understood.

-The filmography in these training scenes is brilliant.

-Ah, that prom look is the same as half of my classmates when we graduated 🤣 down to the blue makeup.

I'm guessing Lila's "prom"/"graduation" was her first solo assassination?

Wait, Handler wants to protect Five...? What the hell is she up to now?

Talking about killing people like it's a fun hobby 🤨

Oh, so the Swedes are triplets? I suspected but I like the confirmation.

Oh, Handler is lying ~~~~ 🎶

She's definitely following her own agenda here and she's leading Lila into danger. The question is if she's going to undermine the Commission for revenge of if she wants to prove her ability to get promoted back into administrative ranks of the Commission.

Either way, this will not end well for Five.

Lila is going to end up having to choose between Diego and Handler, isn't she?

Five stays in the car to give Luther space... No matter what Five says he actually cares about his siblings' feelings, doesn't he? He's the most overprotective of them all and always has been. It's sweet.

Ah, Luther and Vanya bonding over Five being an asshole. ☺️

"very warm and cuddly father" 🤣

Of course Vanya figured out Five was sparing her feelings, because she's not dumb

Oh, thank you for the honesty, Luther! Gotta love that.

I'm actually really happy to see Luther owning up to his mistakes instead of trying to act like the flawless leader. I think he grew a lot after accepting that Reginald wasnt perfect and I'm glad to see that growth still happening as he learns how to be an independent person. I just hope his guilt doesn't turn into even more self-hatred.

"you had kind of a bad childhood" -understatement of the century, Luther!

Luther, you have pissed off the mobster, you moron. You're on big trouble now.

Dramatic wall punch! 🙄

"when you get angry shit blows up" 😂😂😂

"you're our sister and a member of the umbrella academy" - oh, now you want to include her? The irony of this is that it's the one thing Vanya wanted for the first 29 years of her life and if anyone had said it then, the apocalypse would probably have never happened.

🖕🙊🖕

"I wonder if it's too late to be un-adopted" -ah, you know you love them, Five

Honestly, Allison actually keeps her cool really well, if I went through that phone call I would have broken something.

Why the hell does Klaus want menudo first thing in the morning?? Ew...

Klaus butchering "the frog and the scorpion"... You were doing so well but ended up completely missing the point of that story, dummy.

Diego's stab wound is healing really quickly...

Wait, he's healing quickly and Allison doesn't have a neck scar... Plus Klaus is immortal... Hmm, I wonder if quick healing is an ability they all share? Though that would put Diego's scars (and maybe Ben's death) into perspective...

Does Diego wax his chest? Those pecs are real smooth for someone who spent over two months in a 60s mental institution. 😆

"we've all had the urge" 😂 and Diego's sarcastic laugh 🤣

Who's the 12th of the Magestic 12? Oh, I WONDER WHO THAT COULD BE??? Maybe a certain monocled asshole?

"Mamie pink" is Klaus's new nickname, I don't make the rules.

Klaus, you are freaking the boy out with all this new information...

Oh no, the homophobia 😡😡😡

You know what's more heartbreaking about this homophobic disaster? Dave is likely in the closet and this whole situation here and the hate his uncle is showing must be so painful to him, it would probably bury him even deeper in the closet...

Klaus... The punch... Oh, baby... 😢 Oh no, I'm going to cry 😭😭😭

Is Raymond really implying that Allison is a spy? Damn...

Just tell him the truth, Allison! How do you marry a person without telling them something so big about yourself??

Oh, so Klaus has been sober for 3 years... Interesting.

No, Klaus! Don't start self-destructing again! 😢😢😢

It must be so painful for Ben to watch this and not be able to stop it...

Oh shoot, the cult found him.

"prophet"? "holy wanderer"? Interesting.

Poor Klaus just wants peace.

They seriously couldn't get a suit for Five too? Is he not allowed to wear anything else?

Five is onto Lila 🎶

Luther, are you stress eating? Well, at least you're not going on a bender again.

Awww, Luther- Allison reunion. Cute. Please don't make it weird.

Oh God, the awkward small talk is back 😩

I'm glad Luther is being so mature about this. I like this dynamic better.

"Vanya is on a farm. And happy" and Allison finds the happy part weird. Diego in the "nuthouse" and Allison doesn't find that weird at all, even does that 'yeah, ok makes sense' face. Klaus "cult leader" and Luther isn't surprised at all, that little "eh" was so funny.

Lord, this family is mess.

"Doomsday" *awkward chuckle* -you guys are getting way too used to this.

"Diego, try not to do anything too stupid" 😆 ah, brothers.

Lila in red heels, like mommy... 😏

Reggie taught them ballroom dancing? And Handler had the same idea?

Um.... Ok, so new theories! Do Handler and Reginald know each other? Could Reginald have been in the Commission? I'm going to be thinking about this for a while...

Just let the girl lead, Diego. Stop being a little bitch.

GRACE?!

So mom!Grace is either a cyborg or she was modeled after this woman... Makes curious about Reggie's relationship with this lady.

Diego going through the universal horror every kid goes through when realizing that mommy and daddy are "together". 🤣🤣🤣 "I can't picture it on my head. That's nasty"

She didn't tell him her name was Grace but apparently it is.

Am I the only one getting weird desperate and co-dependant vibes from Sissy?

Oh no! Save the baby!

Holy shit! HOLY SHIT! Vanya's powers are incredible! The special effects in this scene are unbelievable!

Save the child!

How did his lips get blue so quickly?

THE RETURN OF THE MAGIC ALIEN LIGHTS! AAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Ok, I need to pause to gather my thoughts... Ok, things I hope don't happen-please don't magically "fix" the disabled boy, and please don't make the powers transferrable (that's just lazy writing, don't rehash "Misfits").

However, other than that I'm just very curious what those lights will do to Harlan. Will they just save his life? Will he gain powers? Will he have some weird connection to Vanya now? I'm dying to find out!

Anyway, back to the ep.

Baby boy is ok!

Luther, did you think pissing off the mobster would end well?

Elliot just starting up at Luther in awe and visibly fighting not to poke him. 😆

HELL NO, LUTHER! NO DRUGS! DON'T YOU REMEMBER THE LAST TIME?? YOU GOT YOUR BROTHER KILLED!

Oh, Sissy... Poor woman.

There going to kiss, aren't they?

Melancholic music kicking in. Sad emotional talk. Sitting way too close. Yeah, they're going to kiss.

Aaaaaand there's the kiss! ☺️

But now I need to pause and digress again...

Yeah, Sissy's feelings for Vanya are not healthy at all. In fact they mirror Vanya's feelings for Leonard- she's unhappy with her life and clinging to the first person that gives her attention. She wants help, she wants to be rescued, she's touch and attention starved. She's co-dependant and emotionally manipulative.

I'm not saying Sissy is a bad person, she's not, she's a sad person stuck in an unhappy marriage, terrified of being abandoned (almost paranoid) and exhausted under a lot of pressure dealing with a disabled child. And then in comes Vanya, who is perfect with Harlan, so loving and kind and has nothing else to pour all her attention towards. Of course Sissy sees salvation in Vanya and is desperate to keep her.

I'm not saying Vanya and Sissy can't have a beautiful healthy relationship, they can, but not like this. Sissy is clinging too tight and using Vanya to make herself feel better and make her life easier. They both deserve better than that and I hope they get it.

I'm starting to think that all relationships in this season might be doomed to fail:

-Sissy and Vanya have a co-dependant and emotionally unhealthy infatuation and Sissy is married to a man that, while not great, still clearly loves her;

-Raymond and Allison have too many secrets between them that are causing a major rift, they can fix it but there's also the chance that Ray might not be able to accept the truth about her;

-Lila is a double agent using Diego to get close to Five, she seems to be developing feelings but the fact that she's lying about who she is and working for Handler is obviously toxic;

-Klaus is pining over a person that Dave has not yet become and while he only wants to save Dave's life, it's obvious there's too big an experience and culture gap between them for a relationship to flourish;

-Luther and Allison have become one-sided and less innocent and puppy-love than before, now it really is just creepy and unhealthy (whereas before it was understandable because they grew up together under an emotionally unavailable father and isolated from the real world, naturally they became attached and confused their feelings, their attachment wasn't healthy but it was justified and almost innocent... Not anymore though);

-we have no concrete proof yet, but it seems Ben MIGHT be pining over a girl that might not even see him, he's dead, it might be an interesting dynamic storywise, but it's not going to happen, it's unhealthy and unfair;

Some of these couples might still survive and become great, it's still really in the season after all, but they have a lot of growing to do before they get there.

Anyway.... Back to the episode.

Oh Klaus... Off the wagon...

Allison being a good sister and taking care of her brother. My heart ❤️

Luther, you idiot... Well, at least you're getting high in a safe environment.

Luther and Klaus are self-destructing, my poor boys.

"you are super weird" - Luther, you have no zero right to call anyone weird, have you looked in the mirror??

"the woman I love loves someone else" -the woman you love is. your. SISTER!

I really like poor Elliot, I hope nothing bad happens to him.

Jesus, that's creepy, Luther.

Didn't I say Reginald was the 12th? 😏

Roswell? Reggie probably has a vested interest in that.

Blink out of there, Five.

I love that Five's main move is always 'teleport onto their backs and go for the throat'.

Wait, why did Five's teleportation glitch???

The music!!!!

Wait, did Diego's aim just glitch too???

Could these power glitches be connected to Vanya's magic lights going into Harlan? Or could it be something about the Swedes? Or about Reginald's presence, seeing as he dodged Diego's power before? Hmm...

Oooh, Lila has to choose between Diego and her mission already? Interesting... Of course she chooses to save Five.

Badass Lila is amazing!

So she could have helped Diego after helping Five but instead she just walks away? Huh, unexpected.

Diego, you adrenaline junkie. Good moves though.

The ancient Greek is a surprise! I really want to know what Five said to Reginald!!! What did he say? I need to know!!!

Another great chapter!! Very emotional too!

I want more!!!

[directdogman]

could we get some random facts/headcannons about the main three (jack, dave, henry)? i wanna know more--

So, you want trivia? Sure, I got some o’ dat.Jack’s full name is Jack Fitzgerald Kennedy, aside from being an obvious nod to the late US president, “Fitzgerald” was chosen as his middle name as it’s the surname of F. Scott Fitzgerald, the author of The Great Gatsby, which is the book that the inappropriate, yet endearing usage of “Old Sport” by Dave came from. In very early development, I tossed around the name Mike for OS, but due to Scott coincidentally turning Mike Schmidt into a sibling zombie going from Freddy’s location to Freddy’s location with a new name each time, from SL onwards- I kinda thought to distance myself from that name, so things’d be less confusing.Jack’s name comes from three sources. The obvious one is that when he goes “LEGACY” his face turns into a pumpkin, and he’s orange. The second is a nod to the dude who tricked the devil, Stingy Jack, who ended up living an immortal life due to a deal that went wrong, only to find himself unable to enter heaven OR hell. (Sound familiar?) Shadow Doggo is based is on the British legends of black hounds. The image of Blackjack barging into a room full of people and mauling Henry by the throat is inspired by Black Shuck, an alleged hellhound who broke into a church, killing worshippers, and leaving scorchmarks on the door on the way out.The other legend is of Richard Cabell, who allegedly sold his soul to the devil, only for it to be sealed away, and his resting place was pursued endlessly by frustrated hell hounds, trying to free the soul. The twist on this story is that the tomb is empty, the hell hound IS the soul, and the hound has a soul of his own imprisoned in a hell of his making.Blackjack’s ability to move through timelines manifests in DSaF 2, when he can comment on events from other savegames in current ones, not unlike Flowey in Undertale. The ability canonically is the physical manifestation of Jack’s desire to alter time, to turn back the clock and prevent Dee’s untimely death.Some of Jack’s qualities are actually nods to my own. Jack’s height is 5′10-6′2, which is the height range I am in, Jack’s pizza preferences are like my own, and there’s a few other eerie similarities I only now realize, but those are for another post, I guess. Jack’s orange colour was chosen in DSaF 1 (instead of pink, red, green) because the suit the player wears in DSaF 1 is orange. Simple as. At one point in development, I considered giving Jack the surname of “Johnson”, but an artist I was working with pointed out that “Peter Johnson” essentially means “penis penis”. Johnson was the surname of a US president who resided over the early vietnam war period, and was the vice president of JFK, so I just went one back, and decided to adopt the “Fitzgerald” as a reference to Gatsby, as I said previously.Dave’s an odd one to discuss, because he was kind of an enigma before DSaF 3. I’ll just give a few facts, then. I don’t know what Dave is. Dave flat out implies he’s actually half eggplant in DSaF 2, but with how dishonest he is, I doubt that to be the case. I consider him a cryptid, because according to Dave in DSaF 3, he was purple as a kid too, long before his death.Him and Jack are polar opposites in a weird inverted way. Dave’s immortality comes from manually repossessing his body, because he can’t let go. He’s alive through sheer determination, even though it’s a lie and it’s eating him alive from the inside out. Jack’s alive against his will, because he can’t die. It’s like determination vs perseverance. An unstoppable object vs an unmovable object. This is why they work so well in a pair; they’re completely complimentary. They cover each other’s weaknesses. This is represented in the Flipside segment, because Jack and Dave each have a weak attack/defense stat, but can boost each other to make each other both stronger, and equally strong/tough in the same ways. Funny, that.Dave’s relationship with Henry is something I never quite got to show properly on screen due to never showing any scenes before Henry’s death that don’t involve murder. Henry calls Dave “Willy” as a subtle way to demean him, because it’s slang for wiener, and that’s why Dave hates it so much.I’ve written a long ass post about Henry in the past. It’s here, in case you wanna read it. There’s obviously more that I never wrote down, but there ya go. Explains how he got from birth to the circus, anyhow, and why he has a book. Bonus fact: he listens to very old music (mostly classical) as he works, hence why he had My Grandfather’s Clock stuck in his head as he created Dee’s new vessel, and why his theme is a waltz. Henry is also much older than Dave, who is slightly older than Jack. My original headcanon design for Henry was a flushed version of Stephen Fry, but tbh, YOUR design for him has really grown on me :)Hope this helped!