#it feels so fucking gross and i can't do anything about it bc you CANNOT fuck w the tube

[artistformerlyknownasbutttrumpet]

You’re a genocide apologist, and we will remember until the day your favorite genocidal politicians wipe us off the planet - which you’ll pretend to care about until your own comfort is affected.

I hope nobody buys your book.

if there had been a choice available to me that would ensure not a single further act of genocide would ever take place--a choice that would make it so families weren't viscously slaughtered, children's bodies wouldn't be lining the streets, innocent people wouldn't be stuck with lifelong traumas i cannot even begin to comprehend the magnitude of--of COURSE i would have picked it. of COURSE. the problem, tho, is that there wasn't. my options were "pick the person who would kill everyone if he got the opportunity" and "someone who will make it so fewer people suffer," and i went with the one that would make fewer people suffer. bc at least that would save some children. some innocent people who did nothing but be born. bc to me, some was better than none

think of it this way: i work at a domestic violence shelter. sometimes we get calls from people who are in dangerous situations but for whatever reason (needs are too high, we don't have the resources available, they're out of scope, our grants will only pay for intimate partner violence, not family violence, etc etc), we can't offer them the resources needed to help them

now, what i could do, when that happens, is quit my job and refuse to work for an organization that would ever turn someone in need away. i could say "i don't care what your reasons are, letting even one person suffer is wrong, and i can't be complicit"

but the thing is, if i decided to take that stand, it wouldn't change anything, bc it wouldn't change any of the circumstances. it wouldn't provide more funding to the shelter. it wouldn't give us staff who can deal with higher needs. etc etc

what it WOULD do, however, is put me in a position where i am suddenly not helping ANYONE. my stance that nobody should be without services, no matter what, leading to a boycott, means that everyone suffers

what i CAN do, tho, is continue to work at the shelter, while actively advocating for improvements on the side. i can help with fundraisers, and offer suggestions to my higher ups, and help with grants. i can spread the word. i can make my voice heard. i can fight for these people we have to turn away, but i can do it while still helping the people we can serve

the moral stance of "these people should be helped" is an admirable one. it's the one you should have. it's one of compassion and human connection. but we also have to recognize that we can't always save everyone all at once. i would argue that most of the time we can't. sometimes we have to pick the choice that causes the least harm, and then continue to advocate for bigger changes on the side. abstaining from helping entirely just means everyone gets hurt, and that's completely counter to that core belief of compassion

i care SO much about the victims of this genocide. there is nothing i can ever do that will make me understand the horrors of what they're facing. and did it feel fucking gross to advocate for someone who aided the perpetrators? of course it did. but i did it, despite the discomfort, bc i knew that, in the end, it would at least save some people, and that was better than none

but too many people didn't agree with that. too many people abstained, or decided to try leaning to the right, and now i'm terrified bc i don't know how this ends, but i don't think it's good. i think a lot of people are going to be hurt, and i think we could have prevented it, but instead of coming together, we split apart and caused something terrible to happen. we didn't just quit working at the shelter--we shut the whole thing down. and now where do the people who need help go? where are they going to go? don't you see there is nowhere for them to go?

the doors to safety have been shut, and i don't know how to open them, and now we're all stuck outside

we have nowhere to go

and that's terrifying

[maraeffect]

honestly you don't know yourself until you feel your own chest tube juices leaking out and dripping all over you.

[lunas-side-anime-blog]

aot veteran/104 corp icks bc im back on my bullshit

someone requested AOT veteran icks, they didn't specify nsfw or not so I did both and also added sasha connie and jean bc i luv them:) feel free to message/inbox with requests!

(levi, erwin, hange, jean, sasha and connie)

Levi

will visit ur place and organize things without you asking. he'd just be like "ur welcome, now your kitchen makes sense" and ur like sir, I don't know where anything is now??? also he'd def the type to proclaim he's better than you for only getting two hours of sleep when you got four. honestly so many icks come to mind for this one, imma limit it to those two for now (stay tuned lol)

nsfw: tries to be rough with you but forgets his own strength. will try to throw you on the bed, but he does it too hard so you completely miss the bed and fall on the other side of it and he's just standing there like "🧍🏻...my bad."

Erwin

you cannot convince me this man doesn't wear water shoes at the pool. you guys say you want a dilf until you actually get one bc this is the type of shit it entails^^

nsfw: erwin cannot dirty talk for shit. im srry but if you're a lil kinky this isn't the man for you. try to call him daddy and he'd be like "we don't have kids?" and you explain the kink to him and he'd just say, "have you considered therapy?🤨" now he's concerned, boner gone, you feel called out, just go to sleep tbh

Hange

they're def a firm believer in natural deodorant and won't take the graceful hints that it's not working. prob wouldn't chill w them on a hot day is all i'm saying

nsfw: feel like they'd be really good in bed tbh like i'm struggling to think of an ick. hange has big dick energy, weirdos just do it better idk. i think maybe hange would try to spit in your mouth (they a freak) and they have so much and its thick and globby like the back of the throat type spit, your gonna choke bro im gagging as a i type-

Jean

bring back toxic masculinity because Jean's hair care routine is so good to the point he'll call out your split ends, i just know it

nsfw: a fucking chatterbox like his homies know everything. you've walked in on him telling connie in extreme detail how he had you in a full nelson last night while you screamed bloody murder and he doesn't see why ur mad. "babe, if anything i'm bragging about you 😏" fucking idiot istg. also kinda gross but I think he's the type to keep sniffing his fingers after fingering you like well into the next day EWW

Sasha

obvi she can't share for shit so I think she'd be an annoying person to eat out with. like yk when you're with your friends and only one person puts their card down so the rest can Venmo them? I think you can ask her to Venmo 20 and she'd send 15 and say something like "oh I didn't eat as many fries" but she fr did. never puts her card down either so believe it or not? jail.

nsfw: will literally be on her phone mid-sex with you. feel like she'd be really into the subway surfer vids and yeah, you go down on her and look up and she brought her own entertainment? ipad child behavior

Connie

i think he'd say "we" when talking about his fave sports team as if he contributed. like, "really connie, you helped win the superbowl? did you score a touchdown?" grow tf up

nsfw: insane bush on this one, i feel like he doesn't groom for shit and whatever, that's your choice! but I also feel like college-aged modern connie would talk shit about women who weren't bald down there and won't eat it unless it is. HYPOCRITE!! I think when he gets to his mid-twenties tho he'd mature (sasha beat his ass)

[romanarose]

Physical Touch with the Triple Frontier Boys

Triple Frontier Master List All fanfic masterlist

Thoughts on the TF boys expressing their love for you in Physical touch, and you returning it. Be sure to comment which love language you'd like to see next!

Acts of Service Word of Affirmation Quality Time

Warnings: PIV sex, nonsexual nudity, mentions of oral, (f and m receiving), chronic pain, brief reference to child abuse (bc I can't let the Millers off easy, can I)

Didn't want to make his too sexual bc physical touch isn't just about sex but like. Let's be honest here, am I wrong?

**********************

Benny Miller

Don't let him fool you. Benny is a strong farm boy, ex-military, but he's not afraid of being things that may be perceived as feminine. He will take any opportunity to touch you, even in the most innocent ways. You had a long day, and Benny was more than happy to treat you right. Using ingredients in the fridge that google said made face and hair masks (Is there avocado on your face right now? Yes. Are entirely sure the egg in your hair is doing anything? No.) Benny gives you the first facial that didn't involve his dick in your face since college. He puts on a homemade hair mask in your hair, massaging it into your scalp tenderly, and even letting you put the remainder in his hair. In the shower he washes you, and impressively does not make a move o fuck you, simply taking care of you. Afterwards, you sit in front of the tv between Benny's legs as he brushes and braids your hair so that the shiny locks (the eggs did work!) are in nice waves in the morning.

*

Benny had a long day, walking in your house and immediately flopping on the couch as he said hello. You knew what he wanted, even if he wouldn't ask, feeling silly. Walking over to him, you ask if he wants you to lay with him and he nods. Carefully, you lay down on top of his sprawled-out body. As you watched ABC family you play with his messy blonde hair, full body weight on him and wondering how he could breathe, you felt his body relaxing.

"You know Benny, we can get you a weighted blanket"

"I like this better."

Santiago Garcia

Santiago Garcia can't keep his hands off you, the bedroom is no exception. Santi would partake in a myriad of positions, but his favorites were anything that he got the most contact with your skin. Doing doggy style, he never strayed far, his chest connecting with your back, or he'd pull you up flush against him to cup your breasts and kiss your neck. When he went down on you, Santiago's hands were always busy, roaming your body as if it was the first time being explored. This man cannot even sit back and enjoy a blowjob, his hands are always in your hair as he tells you how beautiful you are, touching your tits, or feeling himself in your throat.

*

Stubborn man. He will not ask for help if it's his only option. He'll beg you to give him a 5th orgasm, but he cannot admit when he's in pain. It's not just his knees. This man is middle aged, and just like you, he has pains. When you push Santi onto the couch, telling him to take off his jeans, a grin splits on his face. "Hold your horses, cowboy"

You pull out the container of magnesium lotion, and he looks even more excited. "Santi it's not lube!" You rub the lotion on his legs, tenderly and carefully taking care of his knees and calves, even going to far are to peel off his socks. Initially not a fan, insisting his feet are 'gross', you insist you don't mind (he is freshly showered, of course) and ask if it's okay to try it. He lets you, and find he really, really likes his feet massaged. The magnesium helps with the aches, and it's always nice to skin to skin.

Will Miller

His body was broad and sweaty and all-consuming over you, his back chest up against your back as he fucked into your center, deep as always. Every fucking inch of you was covered by him, protected. As he lay on top, full weight heavy and comforting, his arms were wrapped over yours, fingers intertwined, even his legs were pinning you to the mattress. He came inside you, warmth coating you on the inside as much as his skin did on the outside, he took a few moments to breath to relish feeling you so completely. "Baby, can we stay like this for a bit?" He asked, not wanting to be any further away than he was right now. As he laid on top of you, only pulling away slightly to put a blanket over the pair of you, all you can think of is how safe and cared for he makes you feel. You fall asleep like that, with him still inside you, as close as two people can possibly be.

*

Will isn't a talker. If he's bothered, or upset or sad, he's not going to tell you. But that's why your job is take care of him. He cares for you, you care for him. But you have to frame it as asking a favor, as needing him. So, bathtub full of water lavender oil and Epsom salt, (no candle bc strong smells hurt Will's head), an open door so the steam and heat doesn't trigger him, you lay in the warm water with Will's large body surrounding you. He had his arms wrapped around you, knees bent around you as metaphorical extra protection to some imagined threat. Will likes this. Will likes being there to comfort you, Will likes to be there to protect you. Will is a caretaker, a protector, first and foremost, just ask Ben. Who shielded Ben from their dads alcoholic rages? Who bandages him up after fights? Will. Will needs to be needed, and you are happy to allow him that.

Francisco Morales

A hand on your thigh, fingers interlaced as you walk, a grasp around your waist. It's protective, he knows how men at bars can be, but also a bit possessive, you know, how Frankie wants to touch you all the time. His mind constantly whirs with worst case scenarios... he doesn't want you getting hurt, or someone touching you without consent... but also... he likes knowing. He likes knowing that other men see you, but know they can't have you, wouldn't even try, not with the way you sit on his lap. You are all dolled up, showing so much skin that a lesser man would be nervous, or demand you change. But Frankie doesn't see it like that. First of all, he would never tell you what to do. Second of all, he couldn't even if he tried, but thirdly, the primal, animalistic party of his mind loved showing you off. Look at how good you looked, and only he got to put his hands on you (Well, and Ben as you swing danced to Come on Eileen but that's beside the point). Frankie pinches your ass as you lean over the bar ordering another drink. For good measure.

*

Later that evening, as the crowd fills in and the men get drunker, more obvious with their staring, even as you are surrounded by four ex-military men, you notice Frankie's touch more and more possessive around you. You excuse yourself to the bathroom, much to more Frankie's visible distress, and on your way back to put money in the jukebox. After a few other peoples songs came and went, Frankie immediately looks up from his drink, looking at Santi as "Siempre en mi Mente" by Juan Gabriel comes on, asking if he put it on, the only person Frankie assumed would even know Juan Gabriel. But you had paid attention to his Spotify as he cooked Sunday morning breakfast. Taking his large, rough hand, you pull Francisco to the dance floor. In the predominantly white small southern town, no one really knew the song, but a few couples were dancing, because really, who is resistant to Juan Gabriel? For the most part, however, the dance floor was nearly empty. This meant that as Frankie held you close, singing along to the words with his mouth hot against your ear, every men in the bar who had been eyeing you got to see his your hands on his as, signaling in no uncertain terms who you belonged to.

*****************

hope y'all enjoyed!!!

Remember, reblogs help a lot, comments mean the world!

@welcometostayingawake @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction @kittyofalltrades @luciannadraven33 @littlenosoul @jake-g-lockley @milkymoon2483 @in-between-the-cafes @howaboutcastiel

[oopsiedaisymae]

Writer ask game? hehehe

On today's fruit platter: 🍓 🍎 🍐 🍇

MWAH!

MWAH jes thank u for the ask!! i will try my best to answer o7

🍓 What’s a fic you’ve written you feel is underrated?

i'm not one to jump to thinking my works are underrated all that often, both because i'm a bit hypercritical of my own work and also bc i can usually predict what might be more popular based on the premise/character i'm writing. but if i had to give an answer from each blog:

cool about it is a songfic-thingy that i wrote for obey me nightbringer around this time last year. when i was going through my masterlist and reorganizing everything, this is the piece that stuck out to me the most as being better than i remembered. some of the phrasing really hits in my opinion, too:

"but being around you leaves his head devoid of all reason. he craves you like flowers crave rain in early spring, like the dead of night craves the gentle kiss of dawn." - mammon's section

"he doesn't question his fondness towards you. you're just... special. he doesn't want to question what makes you feel so nice to be around-- he'd rather just bask in your warmth, like a child savoring the summer sun." - beel's section

i also, like many others, think nightbringer's premise was underutilized for the massive change it made to the franchise. i wish they'd explored the dynamic of knowing the past demons more thoroughly before reversing it, maybe made it an entire spin off game and continued the og timeline? i'm not sure. but i think the early dynamic of nightbringer was really interesting and i like how i captured it here.

back brace blues is a fic i wrote for twisted wonderland about lilia vanrouge. i think it was a pretty decent dive into my first "longer" fic for that blog (longer used incredibly loosely). i wrote it from some inspiration i got from some hcs about him floating around and a fic from a now-mutual of mine about giving him a back rub. as someone who chronic back pain myself i think it's incredibly fascinating to show lilia's age in subtle ways like that. in general, i think lilia has one of the most interesting backstories, and this was my way to explore it. idk. i think the piece is based around some interesting headcanons and some soft domestic moments that i like.

🍎 Is there anything you straight-up won’t write?

despite the things that i tend to post being pretty fluffy and contemplative, i've dabbled in writing other stuff offline. sexual content, violence, stalking, murder, etc etc... just some truly feral shit i've explored over the years with a particular writing buddy of mine. i got into creepypasta at like, 10 lol. my writing boundaries are based on whatever i feel like writing and always in flux. some things i don't ever see myself writing, though:

pedophilia, cuz i think it's a very serious issue and also gross as fuck (includes grooming, very imbalanced power dynamics played completely straight, etc etc)

graphic torture, cuz i'm squeamish and don't have the constitution for that

non-con and cnc, cuz i don't personally like it at all even though i can understand why others do (the ability to give consent in a fantasy that hinges on a lack of it, etc etc)

scat/piss/vomit, cuz squeamish

rough BDSM stuff, cuz i don't like it

probably never gonna write selfship stuff cuz i'm much much more interested in creating ocs and specific narratives

other things that i personally just find gross/upsetting/annoying/am disinterested in etc etc that i either cannot think of right now or have not discovered i dislike yet

i'm someone who has always been really clear in my personal boundaries and moral convictions, because i personally am very keen on separating fiction from reality. i'm a massive pussy and moralist irl (can't even steal from villagers in minecraft bc what if they starve :'( rip) but i think the ability to look at something in fiction and pick it apart knowing it's entirely not real can allow us to reflect on the nature of humanity etc etc. hence why i can read stories with demons and murders and yet can't really stomach true crime. but that's just my opinion personally!

🍐 Is there anything in canon that you absolutely hate and love to fix in fics? A wrong choice made, a fuck-up in characterization, a misunderstanding never cleared up, a conversation never shown onscreen, etc…

a lot of my biggest gripes center around shitty characterization and thoughtless plot points. obey me is incredibly guilty of this so here are some things i constantly correct in fics or just in my general understanding of the lore:

solomon's characterization, specifically in nightbringer and fanon. i talked about him in my last post. idk when the hell he got this reputation as a soft boy that's never done anything wrong. that man's a fucking war criminal lol. AND he's cute and sweet! duality of man! but i hate when all his nuance is scrubbed away and he's basically declawed for the sake of sanitizing the game and/or making people feel like they don't like someone who's done lots of dubious shit.

beel's characterization. oh my god. let him have a personality outside of eating.

satan's characterization. idk when the game decided it was funny to have him only care about cats and being a dick to lucifer but i hate it. give my boy his academic snootiness back. where are his mysterious connections. his nuance. they've fuckin destroyed his nuance.

the lack of lore about the way the celestial realm works, the connections between the three realms, etc. there's so much neglected world building and i always do my best to muster up SOMETHING in the gaps.

i also usually just perceive twisted wonderland's canon and night raven college as an actual university level program instead of... whatever it's supposed to be. idk why some of the characters are so young or why the age spread is so wide or why it's called a "college" if only some of the characters are college age. that's the sort of main premise of my twst blog, basically just correcting that stuff bc it makes absolutely no sense to me and i think some of the plot points are more interesting that way (riddle's relationship w his mother, vil's fame, kalim and jamil's dynamic, etc etc).

🍇 Is there a particular scene/episode/book/etc that you want to just write a million fics about, over and over? Which one?

for obey me, the way most of them are solomon-centric... fucking embarassing lol

i want to write the end of season 2 of og over and over forever. i think it's so incredibly interesting. the back and forth with solomon, the talk with lucifer, the impending doom, being saved by simeon who basically destroys his relationship with michael and Father in that moment... so juicy. i wish i could read and write about it forever

in my mind, my magus opus fic is this detailed fic of the night solomon and mc are implied to sleep together in og season 3... so many thoughts. it's needy and full of yearning. he's way too chipper the next day. belphie's line that implies he was geTTING OFF TO IT???? jesus. i wish i had the focus to lock in and write a detailed smut fic from several povs about this event

i eat up every single fic about lucifer and mc making a pact in og season 1 and would love to have my own interpretation one day

for twisted wonderland:

i would love to explore each overblot scene in obscene detail. specifically riddle, azul, and jamil

i want to write so many fics about chapter 6, specifcally with mc and pomefiore. i loved that book and the dynamics. i want to write a fic about vil's kisses. i want to write about hunting down rook with epel on the brooms. i want to write about the angst at the end with almost losing grim and a hypothetical where mc jumps in to grab him instead. god i forgot how much i love book six until literally right now lol

twst is better written imo (sorry) so i have less moments i want to build on but i'm sure there's more rattling around in my brain lol

[according2thelore]

Love potion no. 9

1, 3, 4, 9(haha), and 11

Literally the 1st fic that introduced me to yall and probably my favorite!(though you have so many good ones, especially when combined with the art🤌🤌)

hi!! :) EEP thank you so much, i'm so glad you like it! i agree--charlotte's art immediately elevates anything it's accompanying into an S-tier item

here's the link to love potion no. 9 on ao3! (quick recap: it's the love potion one, lol)

1: What inspired you to write the fic this way?

i LOVE love potion fics, especially subversive love potion fics where they don't work how they're supposed to, or work in opposite ways. love potion fic (not sex pollen fics (which are also v fun but mostly don't deal w the icky gross guilty emotions of being in love w someone)) are pretty rare generally, but oooooh i eat them up when i find them.

in this case, i chose dean because a sam who found out he was bewitched would probably avoid dean as much as possible as to not make dean uncomfortable, and i think sam would have the most guilt about taking away/infringing upon someone else's autonomy/true wants. and i loveeee writing angsting winchester narration. it's delicious 2 me.

i also wanted it to feel kinda rom-commy? third act conflict, miscommunication, and all.

3: What’s your favorite line of narration?

It’s exactly what he had thought it would be, when he still let himself think about it. He had shared this man’s toothbrush, had shared his bed, had shared his clothes. This isn’t anything foreign, this is Dean. It's the rush of the Impala’s wheels underneath him, the adrenaline of a fight, the spark of Roman candles, the salt of sweat and tang of blood and the depthless, endless night.

this one, i think! i think i have some really solid lines in this fic, but this one makes my chest fuzzy. or this one (also solid!):

Dean’s eyes are soft, and his mouth is pulled into a hesitant smile. He looks exhausted, suddenly. He looks…In his pajamas and bare feet and toast crumbs on his shirt, Sam doesn’t think he’s ever loved anything more. Sam’s throat closes. This is so unfair. This is so fucked.

4: What’s your favorite line of dialogue?

“Well, you went on that huge rant about those kudzu-eating goats last month and invasive species blah blah blah. So wildflowers. Y’know.” Dean trails off, and looks at Sam over his shoulder as he wads the empty paper bag into a ball. “They’re wild.”

i don't know! i think this one is fun bc it kinda captures the dean i'm going for in this fic: very purposefully blasé. he cares but he can't let you know, until it all bubbles over. he listens to sam's dorky rants, but cannot tell him that outright lol--what if sam finds out he cares?? no shot.

bonus: i don't know which one to count this as (dialogue or narration), but i like this line because dean's trying to do the math on the acceptable brother-to-woman ratio for sam to have sex with him, which i thought was pretty funny

Dean had been coming around by then, muttering “S’mmy? ‘f there’re two of ‘em…would you do it then? ‘ow many—how many do I have to get?” as Sam hauled him to his feet.

9 (lol): Were there any alternate versions of this fic?

originally (to the surprise of no one, lol) this fic was longer! i had a couple of scenes included in the "montage" in the middle, about an early kiss (in which dean decides to go for it and sam thinks he just assaulted his brother), and a couple other i forget now! i am terrible about wanting to do every single idea a have for a fic, even when they don't fit as well.

i also was originally going to have the potion work the entire time, but it plays out the exact same. dean doesn't feel any more in love w sam than he already is, bc he is already in love with him, and thinks the potion didn't work. he does all the shenanigans anyway, bc like hey why the fuck not? but then it became tricky when it came to how sam finds out that this is genuine emotion from dean and not the potion actually working.

11: What do you like best about this fic?

i think it's fun! besides the end, it's mostly ridiculous and fluffy, and i think i got sam's brain pretty okay! which is not my usual forté. i like the balance it strikes between being fluffy (the flowers, the bar, etc.) and agonizing (sam's running narration abt this being real). i was genuinely shocked that this is one of my more popular fics, but i'm so glad it is! it makes me happy! :)

(send me one of my fics and i'll answer some questions!)

[aspd-culture]

ASPD + DID/OSDD culture is:

Seeing someone talk about "internal family systems" and, after doing a bunch of research, groaning. It can very easily be mistaken as "Huh. I have an internal family system, so I must be a DID/OSDD system!"

It feels like the same thing as people without trauma trying to worm their way into our spaces again. IFS and DID/OSDD are not the same thing. I've seen two people come to think they are/might be a system because of IFS now. Not only am I livid, but now my opinion of them has gone down considerably. Thanks to my black and white thinking, both of them are wrong, idiots, and causing severe harm to others.

And I can't even say anything to anyone involved. I'll immediately be labeled an asshole and told that I'm "downplaying their trauma". No, the fuck I am not! I've HAD an IFS in the past, and the two are VERY different things!

Oh gosh, do not worry you are so valid and right in this./gen I *hate* IFS-based therapy for exactly this reason. I will be the first in line to admit that I do not get how IFS works, but I do know that the professionals I have come across who work with them say *everyone* has one. If that's the case, they have nothing to do with systems AT ALL, yet I have seen people labeling themselves an "IFS System" and just?? No. With all required respect and whatever, no.

Endos are one thing bc most of them are just unaware of their trauma bc forgetting trauma is literally part of the point of many DID systems especially - hence the amnesia symptom - so I can handle why they think untraumatized systems exist as long as they realize and admit their mistake when their system is ready.

But as far as I can tell, all IFS is doing is pushing singlets to believe they are systems and some systems to believe they are singlets dealing with IFS - especially OSDD-1a systems.

On top of all of that, I have seen professionals claiming IFS therapy is a "treatment" to DID/OSDD/UDD and gross gross gross I can't. I just can't.

I am not a professional and cannot say if IFS are a real thing, fuck I'm not even versed enough in IFS to know exactly what it is (is it the whole inner child/inner teen thing???), but I DO know many providers are misunderstanding it and spreading that lack of understanding to the patients they care for, which is irresponsible as hell.

One day, I'll research IFS, but I don't want to until the nasty taste of all these bad providers is out of my mouth about it so I can research it with an open mind.

(Sorry if this is intense or aggressive. I was quite drunk when I wrote this response).

[imperial-nuisance-rudje]

Fandom shit under the cut, I don't feel like slap fighting people who can't read rn so nothing is tagged

Can't stop thinking about people trying to use anything in this game to prove that a specific character is IC misogynistic without the game being real obvious about it

It got slightly better post-StB but like. All but like one or two major-role women in this game are either fridged or shown to have been victimized by a man, especially if the character was ever antagonistic*, and that continues even to now. I cannot buy misogyny as a "clear-cut" character trait in all but the most on-the-nose cases when the ambient writing is already deeply misogynistic and misogynistic tropes are (even where it has improved) still so often unthinkingly used as a lazy way to further villainy.

*bird-daughter counts for this, given that the game is pretty clear that bird-dad harmed her deeply even if he didn't do it intentionally.

Like if you want to go watsonian about it I won't stop you, it's a valid read, but in the game that has the Tsuyu Arc in it I cannot agree with it being "obvious" that it's intended to be an IC reflection of anything. It's on a similar level of reading as "is this in-game organization meant to be colorist or is it the character designers being that way", yknow?

I think the thing that gets me most about this is that the argument would have a stronger leg to stand on if they used, like, the captured krill scene. Nope, gotta immediately gesture at the lazy villain tropes used in the expansion that is probably peak casual misogyny by volume across the game.

This isn't even an argument that Z's like, somehow enlightened, because even the best case scenario is that he's looking for people who specifically lack power and are fucking furious about it to turn into potential knife-havers, which is not something you do when you give a shit about other people—he's clearly and unambiguously written as a user with zero qualms about means to his end. It's, "you cannot be relying on subtlety about misogyny in the game that has it as extremely strong background radiation and has repeatedly leaned on gross tropes just to show someone as eeeeeeevil before if you're going to claim it's an obvious canon personality trait and not just something easily read into the writing". Because the writing is frequently fucking rancid about casual misogyny, including in ways where I don't think the writers realize what they're doing (0, I genuinely don't think anyone on the writing team realize how bad her relationship with Z is bc there's just no acknowledgment of the severity of it by anyone including 0—the en translation adds more rage in spots but it's added, and the addition doesn't hold up when combined with the rest of her dialogue as 6.x has gone on).

[hyperactivetransdrone]

So yall know how there are only 4 flavors of diet soda pop sold in stores most of the time

With Coca-Cola, Mountain Dew, and Pepsi the most common diets then Doctor Pepper being uncommon in terms of rarity and everything else being mythically rare

Well actually let's do a chart to show both of these:

Common:

Pepsi, Coca-Cola, Mountain Dew

Uncommon:

Doctor Pepper

Rare:

Literally every single other sodapop

Literally that's it, at least where i live and out of those mountain dew is the tastiest now before I continue to my next chart your probably wondering

"Why don't you just get Zero Sugar?"

Because 0 Sugar fucks with my blood sugar and according to my 5 minute Google search some of the sugars in some of the 0 sugars mess with your blood sugar but I don't know which ones and in which sodas and I'm type 1 so the thing that fixes my blood sugar isn't slowed or anything like type 2, it's literally dead, I don't make any insulin by myself I need an outside source for all reasons.

Anyway another thing that effects flavor is the source all rate those next

Bottled - Amazing Tastes really good

Straight from the tap into a glass (made of anything glass glass, plastic glass) - The Best, straight up cannot be outmatched, especially if it's a personal recipe

Fountain - Also really good, better than bottled, but worse than The Tap

Canned - Ew, it's drinkable but it really makes it taste bad

Now only generic brands of pop can be from the tap like root bear can be from the tap but A&W cannot bc the tap is like you made it yourself so you CAN copy Pepsis recipe but it is also made in a factory however you Local Root Bear can be made in a tap but CANT be in anything else (except maybe a glass bottle) so for this next chart of those 4 pop brands it will include everything but tap

Bottled

Pepsi - 6.5/10, pretty good but I like cream sodas and root bear more.

Coca-Cola - 6/10, good but it's too common for me to not be constantly tired of it.

Doctor Pepper - 7/10, good but tastes REALLY similar to coke and pepsi

Mountain Dew - 8/10, the most unique, ergo refreshing of the 4 but I like cream sodas and root bear and Local Sodas, and also unique sodas more

Fountain:

Pepsi - 7/10, slightly better than bottled, but that's probably bc it's fresher... relatively speaking

Coca-Cola - 6.5/10, same reason as Pepsi but again, too popular/common for me to like it anymore

Mountain Dew - 8.5/10, highest I'll give a soda pop that's not unique or local just because it tastes different than all the other pops here

Doctor Pepper - 8/10, same reasons as all the others but also it just tastes different enough from coke and Pepsi that it's just a little bit better

Canned (it's red so you cam probably guess my opinion):

Pepsi - 5/10, bad but coke does it worse probably bc coke is more common/popular

Coca-Cola - 4/10, actual trash, tastes horrible

Mountain Dew - 6.5/10, doesn't actually taste all that different from bottled but does taste good enough that it gets the highest score out of all of bottled

Doctor Pepper - 5.5, it's better than coke and Pepsi that's canned, that I'll say

Umm yeah I just wanted to say my annoyance, please tell me how I'm wrong but if you say

"Just drink normal soda!"

1. That can kill be because in 1 can there's like 36 carbs which is about as much as a stack of homemade pancakes, and it doesn't even fill you as much

2. I've been type 1 diabetic for... (if I Exclude the fact it was at the end of the year so I was practically a year older) like almost 6 years like 5 years and 2/3s a year so pretty much 6 years so I've gotten used to diet and now taste the coating of sugar around my mouth when drinking non diet pop now which just feels really gross like think of it like having plastic sealed to your hand, and I mean sealed, not like latex where you can get it off I mean you can't take it off with your hand, you just have to wait it off like that pine sap that gets stuck between your fingers that won't come off even after washing your hands

Anyway uhh feel free to disagree I will argue you (unless you yell then you are correct) and umm sorry for ranting, I already know no one will see this lol so if you do see this say hi to me :)

[lecoindecachou]

#it always felt a bit onesided#like snart already loved her romantically and sara COULD be in a place where she could love him back. with time#but they didn't get that#bc he died and he died with feelings for her and he died knowing the chance she would start to be as into him was dying with him#but that was fine by him bc at least SHE wouldn't die with him.#in his head she can't love him when he's alive#he knows he's dying he knows he feels something for her he knows he wants the team to live he knows he wants mick to go#he knows he has to die#he knows their chance of a relationship has to die#so maybe sara can start loving him when he's dead#bc sara just can't do tangible long-term relationships by the time snart decided to become a martyr#so. eventually. sara will be the one with a onesided love.#snart dies and sara lives; their roles in their dynamic swaps#it's all rather tragic really. (@frosty-the-killer-doll)

Um, wow, I disagree with all of this. I don't think he loved her, I think he very much fancied her and wanted a relationship with her but love? No. As far as I can tell the way Snart shows love is in his willingness to suffer for someone else. The only two people he canonically loves are his sister and Mick (whether you want to interpret as platonic or romantic is not important, what matters is that Snart is willing to die for him without a second thought and we don't KNOW whether he'd do the same for Sara bc he's never put in that position). And I don't think him dying had anything to do with Sara at all. It was about Mick and making things right between them, because Snart felt responsible for Mick becoming Chronos, period. Trying to make his sacrifice about Sara is more in the realm of shipper headcanon bullshit than anything you can legitimately point at in the actual show. You're assigning a lot of thoughts to Snart that you cannot accurately point at in canon.

As for Sara, I genuinely do not believe she felt anything like that for him at all. Episode 8, she says so herself when she admits the nurse was the first person she cared for like that since her death. In episode 10, he tells her he has feelings for her and she rolls her eyes, doesn't acknowledge it and never brings it up again. He's the one who brings it up in his very last episode, tries to awkwardly ask her out after he literally threatened her with his gun, and she rejects him, and he gets that gross 'challenge accepted' look in his face bc fuck you writers. And frankly her kissing him when he dies was more because he's dying for the team and the hero gets his reward than anything else. It's boringly cliche. If Wentworth Miller had remained in the show, I can almost guarantee you this would've been walked back in the first episode of s2, bc it absolutely would not make sense for them to be together at this point. She kisses him because he's dying, that's all. It's also an obvious throwback to something she tells him in Episode 7 about how the worst thing about dying is how lonely it is.

And you'll notice that your assessment that 'the love becomes one-sided and he haunts her forever' or whatever shipper bullshit you've got in your head is completely invalidated by canon, because the relationship is never brought up again and Sara is completely consumed by her grief FOR HER SISTER in the next season. And then Snart comes back in Doomworld, kills two members of the team and proves how much of a terrible person he is, and she never thinks of him or mentions him ever again.

I guess my issue with Sara x Snart is that they did genuinely have a lil bit of chemistry in the pilot and then... nothing. Just a whole lot of talking, I guess, but nothing that felt even close to the flirtatious tension in the very first episode. It's like the chemistry just disappears after that. And then Sara meets her hot nurse in the 50s and tells Rip she hadn't felt anything romantic/sexual for anyone since she died and thought she wasn't even capable of that anymore, like okay?? So by episode 10 it's canonically established she has not had any feelings like that for Snart at all, and there's only five episodes left until he's dead lmao

[faggotron9000000]

there was a lot of drama around moneycat when she left tumblr and i don't remember any of it well enough to comment on it but i think of her a lot bc she was probably one of the first ppl to point me towards leftist politics (& specifically marx)

she was the first trans lady i saw who did that bit that trans ladies do sometimes where they fantasize that a shitty cis dude would get good if only he became a woman-- which is a funny bit if you don't turn it into like, an ideology lmao.

she was one of the first of many ppl who i saw promoting the radical feminist ethos that 1) gender is defined as a political hierarchy that privileges men and subjugates people who can have babies, referred to as 'women'. the hierarchy is inherent and defining-- you cannot have even the concept of "men" without a counterpoint concept of "women" to contrast them against, and that contrast inevitably plays out via oppression and violence. hierarchy is too entrenched in gender for gender itself to be rehabbed; it needs to be scrapped, evolved-past, into a fully egalitarian future where biology is irrelevant.

this fucked with my head as a freshly-formed trans man because like, i don't think this definition is wrong-- it's an accurate description of how gender has been conceptualized & how it has functioned, at least in my world here in america.

i think it's only recently that i think i've realized that gender is only one of the hierarchies that we live with every day, and its ultimately one of the weakest in terms of producing either solidarity or subjugation, for better and worse. at least ime, i tend to find solidarity among poor/neurodivergent/poc men than i do among non-men who are none of those things.

tl;dr narratives about class struggle cannot be remapped onto gender and still be coherent, bc gender does not change one's prospects for life as strongly as class does-- while women with money do suffer under patriarchy, but the actual punishment for forsaking gender norms is... losing your financial security and class position.

anyway i can't say too much bad about moneycat bc while her takes were awful in 2014-- arguably, she personally was one of the ppl who led me to put off my transition for like, a year and a half; that sucked at the time but tbh wasn't that big of a deal, in the scheme of things-- but being challenged by her led me to figure out some things that have stuck with me since then, in a good way.

the idea that gender is a path to political/ethical purity-- women good, men bad!!!!-- has decades of history in feminist philosophy so moneycat didn't really do anything that her forebears didn't set up, and it kind of makes me uncomfortable that she (a mentally ill trans woman) is still remembered as this unique monster when i see so many of you assholes in the years since implicitly-but-loudly agreeing with her. "men are the bad gender" has been a normie opinion for ~30yrs, she wasn't special. and having reckoned with myc's bad 2014 takes, i think i'm better equipped to own my identity and justify myself to assholes than a lot of the trans men i see coming out today, who are desperately self-conscious about being men at all.

imho moneycat was a worthy ideological challenge for me & i'm disappointed in how i now, ~8yrs later, live in a landscape where people agree with her but don't think about it-- i would wayyyyy rather argue with a radfem trans woman about why men deserve dignity and humanity than spend an hour in the same room with any of the little bratty trans queers i run into who just think men are gross and refuse to even try to justify it. at least she cared about knowing why she thought what she thought, at least that gave me something real to chew on.

between her & jobhaver (sex-negative radical feminist trans woman SWer) i feel like i got an early crash course on reckoning with radical feminism in an environment where the well was not completely poisoned bc all the ppl bringing it up were trans women-- which didn't tell me that radical feminism is right, only that i am capable of hearing from radicals & empathizing with them even if their opinions hurt my feelings. because of this, i don't think radical feminism is inherently transphobic-- its entirely possible for radical feminist action & political theory to be trans-inclusive, hypothetically, someday. i don't think its worth it to shy away from all self-proclaimed radical feminism any time it shows its face, when our contemporary feminist scene is so lacking in materialist critique & so easily co-opted by corporations and government.

i dont think the ultimate goal of radical feminism-- an egalitarian future where biology is irrelevant-- is a bad one. i think their failure comes in the assumption that binary gender will disappear if only we socially condemn it enough-- an opinion that is invariably transphobic against binary trans people but is also shared between radical feminists and the majority of nonbinary people i have met, so do with that what you will i guess. hopefully this attitude leaves me open to solidarity with radical feminists (and gender abolitionists in general) at a time when like, i really would like their help + would also like to see them evolve past the ongoing plague of TERFs and general transphobia

i realized that i prefer a materialist analysis of gender over things that validate me personally, and i've tried to find a balance between those things since, which-- like, it's hard, but the journey's been good imo. now when i log on instead of seeing moneycat's radfem marxist blogging, i feel like i kind of just get a firehose of regurgitated decade-old shit-talk without anything to actually think on or build on or learn from, and like. if i'm going to be the constant subject of debate in my social circles could i at least not die of boredom while i'm here

does anyone remember....... monetizeyourcat