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thekidultlife · 4 years ago

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Plot: After an unexpected encounter with Yoon Jeonghan during a baby shower, more memories unfold from your mind, and his.

Genre: slice of life, angst

Pairing: Jeonghan + fem!reader + Mingyu

Warnings: a bit of explicit language

A/N: Many thanks to my incredibly amazing beta reader, @secndlife, for helping me make this beautiful! Also, I would like to express my gratitude to @xuseokgyu for taking the time to make lovely banners and even a teaser for this series! You are both a joy to work with and I am so blessed to have you both help me. 🧡 Lastly, to our followers and readers who are continually supporting this blog despite its inactivity, thank you! More details about my future works will be addressed after this fic.

Taglist: @haotheheckk, @jeonjungkaka, @soonhoonsol, @fluffyhyeju, @minkwans

“If you love me like you tell me, please be careful with my heart. you can take it, just don’t break it — or my world will fall apart.”

🍁🎧🧡

The cobbled pavements of the narrow alley you were walking on were damp from the rain that had recently poured. It was chipped and uneven in some places, and your thin-strapped sandals would sometimes slip and get stuck between the cobblestones. Despite the imperfections of this street, you had come to love it, just like every other self-respecting college student living around the vicinity. Behind you, the signage of restaurants and thrift stores flashed in bright neon blues and violets, blending with the honey-golden glow of the lights coming from the shops and apartment buildings that rose around you.

This alley was the most beautiful place to go to in the city.

It was a beautiful Saturday night, too, and in your opinion, you had spent it well.

You were walking back to the dorms with your friends and a couple of seniors. You were in the back of the group, where it was quieter. Clutching your arm was Jung Mirae, one of your roommates, who was struggling to walk straight after too many beers.

In the process of half-dragging Mirae, an alarm from your phone rang. You hasted to get it switched off.

Bright laughter pierced the stillness as the ones just a few steps ahead of you, Park Hyewon and Lee Joonyoung, your best friends besides Mirae, kept on cracking jokes that would make the whole group roar with laughter. You giggled at their ridiculousness occasionally while trying to keep Mirae on her feet.

Hangout nights are incomplete without these two, you thought to yourself, as you studied long-legged, pink-haired Hyewon and the tall, broad-shouldered Joonyoung. You watched as they made mean comments at each other and then made up for the teasing by giving each other kisses.

“Gross!” someone called out from behind you, and you could not help but smile.

Joonyoung turned around and playfully gave the finger to the person who had shouted out. "Go get yourself a girlfriend, Sunwoo! It's clear to me that you’re in need of love.”

The group snickered at Joonyoung's words.

As you listened to everyone talk about how good the night was and how hellish the next week would be with final exams coming up, you felt cold fingers touch your cheek.

You turned to Mirae, who was looking up at you with quizzical—albeit drunken—eyes.

“Hey, Y/N." Mirae’s voice was loud and clear in the narrow alley. You brushed her hand away gently. "Why are you crying?”

“What do you mean?” You put a hand over her mouth and tried to tell her to stop spouting off nonsense, but it was then that you felt it—the wet trickle of tears on your face. Surprised, you wiped them away with your hand.

It was true.

You were crying.

The walking paused. Footsteps ceased over the cobbled pavement as everyone halted to look over at you. Your cheeks reddened at the unwanted attention.

“Y/N, is something wrong? Here, let me have Mirae.” One of your classmates reached out to take Mirae.

“Thank you.” I think I drank too much, you despaired, as you kept wiping at your face and waving people away. You made attempts to control your emotions, but nothing could stop the tears from coursing down your cheeks.

“I’m okay, I’m okay,” you kept saying over and over with a hoarse voice that almost didn’t sound like you. “Keep walking, please! Don’t mind me. I think I just drank too much.” You gave a shaky laugh and rubbed your eyes. “I get like this sometimes. Sorry.”

“You did not drink too much tonight, though,” someone commented dubiously. The others agreed and continued to look at you with confused expressions. "You never do."

“Jin-ah is right. And you don’t ‘get like this sometimes,’ babe.” Just a few feet away from you and leaning against Joonyoung, Hyewon crossed her arms. Her face, full of concern over your sudden outburst of emotions, made her look as though she hadn’t spent the night drinking as much as the guys did. “What's wrong?”

“I really don’t know, to be honest.” You pushed a strand of hair away from your face and made a poor attempt to smile at Hyewon. "I think it’s just the beer. Really."

Hyewon looked like she didn’t want to stop questioning you.

Please don’t ask me anything more, you begged with your eyes.

Joonyoung nudged Hyewon casually.

"Okay." Hyewon shrugged as she reluctantly conceded to your lame answers. She walked up to you, linked her arm with yours, and turned to grin at the others placatingly. “Let’s go home for real, gang! I think my girlfriend here just needs to sleep.”

Everyone nodded, put on happy faces, and eagerly put the awkward scene behind them. They once again started with the jokes and laughter and even managed to loop you into their silly conversations. However, their eyes avoided you most of the time, and their jokes were careful. You sensed that nobody wanted to have any part in pulling any triggers you might have. Tonight was no time to be sad. With finals coming up, no one needed any sort of emotional baggage. You felt bad for making them cautious, but you were also grateful for their thoughtfulness about your feelings.

The happy atmosphere became short-lived, though, as five minutes later, a sound cut through the alley and through the facades that everyone was putting up for your sake. It made all of them stop in their tracks once more. Even Hyewon stiffened beside you.

The sound perfectly explained everything that was going on with you, and there was no hiding it now.

Your alarm was playing again.

“Oh, fuck.” Hyewon let out a huge breath and squeezed her eyes shut. She looked as though she was trying to block out the sound. “Y/N, for goodness’ sake, don’t be an idiot. Don’t listen to it. Turn it off—”

But of course, like an idiot, you listened.

“Hey there. If you find yourself listening to this, then it means we have made it to Year 3. Please meet me at the same place where we are tonight: the art pier, one hour before the day ends. I'll be the stupid-looking guy standing by the yacht statue while holding too many roses. I love you. Happy Anniversary!"

This alarm shouldn’t be ringing—because you didn’t make it to Year 3.

“Please turn it off.”

Joonyoung, who was right behind you, reached for your bag, rummaged inside, and pulled out your phone. Glaring at the screen, he shut it off and dropped the phone in the bag again.

The alleyway was silent for a while.

Hyewon sighed. And then she leaned against you and said softly, “Let’s go home.”

The cobbled pavements of the narrow alley you were still walking on were damp from the rain that had recently poured. Hands would steady you from behind when your thin-strapped sandals would slip and get stuck between the loose cobblestones. No one drunk should walk on this alley with its imperfect pavements, but you had come to love it, just like every other self-respecting college student living around the vicinity. As you passed, the signage of restaurants and thrift stores flashed in bright neon blues and violets before melting into the ever-constant amber colors of the street lights.

This alley was the most beautiful place to go to in this city.

It was a beautiful Saturday night, too, and in your opinion, you had spent it well. But you weren’t supposed to spend this night here. Not in this place, despite its beauty, no.

You were supposed to be somewhere else.

You were supposed to be with someone else.

“I know that everybody here is trying to be nice, but let me say it for all of you here, so you don’t have to wonder how it sounds.” Joonyoung kicked a crumpled beer can out of his way as he walked. “Fuck Yoon Jeonghan.”

“Oh, please, Lee Joonyoung.” Hyewon sounded tired. “Thank you for making Y/N more miserable.”

“What do you mean? Bubs, I’m not the douchebag who—ah, whatever.” Joonyoung shrugged and flung middle fingers up the sky. “Wherever you are, Yoon Jeonghan, fuck you!”

“He’s completely drunk,” Hyewon said apologetically, looking around her; some of the campus seniors with you were friends of Jeonghan’s. “Sorry.” And then, looking at Joonyoung exasperatedly, she hissed, “Joonyoung. Cut it out.”

“Let him be,” you said in a drained voice, “let him be.”

You were supposed to be with Yoon Jeonghan tonight, but you weren’t. He was long gone, and all you have left of him was something that you had somehow forgotten to remove, something you wished so desperately to forget.

All you have left of him was his voice—frozen in time through that alarm.

The rest was memories and history.

🍁🎧🧡

Mingyu sips from a coffee mug and nods in understanding as you finish speaking. He leans back on one of the steps of the townhouse, where you both sit. Cars drive down your neighborhood street, their headlights coloring the concrete road with hazy white and yellow lights. You watch their signals blink as they find spaces to park. Leaves continue to fall, and some end up in your hair. You feel Mingyu brush them away. You smile and do the same for him.

It is way past midnight, and here you both sit, snuggling to keep warm against the cold night air and talking about a love long gone.

“So,” Mingyu traces the rim of his coffee cup as he puts the pieces together, “you and Jeonghan-hyung dated during uni days?”

You nod. “Mm-hmm. We dated for two years. And then we broke up during my junior year, which was when that alley story happened.” You look at your boyfriend in mock suspicion. “Not that I’m complaining, but are you sure you want to listen to this story? Because we don’t need to talk about this if you aren’t comfortable—”

“—No, no, baby, I’m okay!” Mingyu chuckles a little bit as he turns to you. “I’m perfectly fine. I really want to know. If you’re not comfortable talking about it, though, we could just put it behind us.” He smiles at you. “I’m okay either way.”

He had stepped onto a minefield of your past without warning. He’s not supposed to be okay either way. You keep staring at him, not believing what he said.

“But, babe…” You sigh as you look at him. “Instead of talking about how Jeonghan and I ended up dating years ago, why don’t we talk about other things first?” You keep searching his face for any sign of uneasiness, any sign of hurt or confusion. “Like, how you felt when you found out. Or, how to avoid getting ambushed by stuff like this in the future.” You lean against him. “I don’t want something like this to happen again, no matter how great we both are at handling surprises. I think this is a good time to talk about things we haven’t talked about yet. Exes, our most embarrassing moments—” you giggle as Mingyu laughs at your last words. “Hey, I’m serious here!”

Your mind recalls the events of the night. You remember twirling in front of your full-length mirror to admire your new dress. You remember how perfect Mingyu had looked when he stepped out of his car and walked up to you. You remember the car ride, the conversation that you had about meeting his family and kissing underneath the porchlight of Aera’s house. You remember the baby shower: meeting Mingyu’s parents, Kim Aera, and Mingyu’s other friends. You remember how happy and secure you felt with Mingyu beside you as he introduced you to his family and some high-profile friends. You remember the crib and the games.

You remember Choi Seungcheol’s surprised expression and shaking Yoon Jeonghan’s hand for the first time in years. You remember Kwon Soonyoung’s drunken announcement.

“So, the former flames have finally met!”

“Well, I guess I got surprised when I found out that you guys used to date,” Mingyu clarifies, “but if we will talk about whether I had strong, negative feelings about the whole thing...” his voice trails off as he looks at you.

“...Uh-huh?” you prod.

Mingyu shakes his head. “I didn’t have any.” He squeezes your hand reassuringly. “You don’t have to worry about me. To be honest, what surprised me the most was the fact that I handled the situation pretty well. Back when we were still at Aera’s house, I really did my best to be careful with how I took in the whole thing. I took care not to show how surprised I was with my expressions, my words...”

“Mm-hmm.” You nod along with him as his voice trails off. “Yes. I agree. You handled it pretty well. But I am still so sorry for dropping that bomb on you that way.” You look up at him with an apologetic expression. “We haven’t really talked about past relationships that much yet, so...”

“Y/N, please don’t overthink.” His face hovers inches away from yours as he looks deep into your eyes. “See?” He makes all sorts of cute expressions, and you couldn’t help but smile. “I’m okay.”

You become willing to believe him, but then you catch him looking at you with a twinkle in his eye.

“Although,” Mingyu adds, “I did feel a bit self-conscious.” He sighs dramatically, and he pouts—adorably. “I mean, he’s the Yoon Jeonghan. You dated the Yoon Jeonghan that most girls nowadays are swooning over. Who am I compared to that?”

As he continues to make such cute faces while saying the most outrageous things, you stare at him, open-mouthed. “What the hell.” You had seen through his joke, of course, but you could not help but look at him incredulously. “Is my boyfriend actually saying this to me right now while looking so drop-dead gorgeous beside me? Is he really comparing himself right now to someone else?”

Mingyu ignores your words and continues. “Yoon Jeonghan, actor extraordinaire, ranking twentieth at this year’s Asia’s Sexiest 100. Hmm. Yes.” He considers his words and nods. “I did feel intimidated. He’s good-looking and is amazing at acting and—”

“—Whoa, whoa, whoa.” You put your mug down beside you, and you giggle as you take Mingyu’s face in your hands. “You are one gorgeous person, too, and I am so, so in love with you. Stop comparing yourself to him.” You nuzzle his face, smiling. “I know you’re just joking about this, but please. Stop.”

He continues to look at you with a playful pout, but his eyes turn darker voice drops a notch lower. “Make me.”

You feel him grin against your lips as you make him stop speaking.

At the back of your head, you remember Kim Aera’s words when she talked about her husband.

“Not all women are as fortunate as I am, you know? Some of us meet such crappy guys that it’s a miracle I ended up finding someone worth the wedding vows.”

You aren’t one to believe in fortunes, so you try to think about all the things you must have done right to deserve a man such as Kim Mingyu. More importantly, you wonder if you would be able to keep him by your side.

Too much thinking, too much thinking, you chastise yourself as you kiss Mingyu harder, wanting to erase everything from your mind.

“I love you,” you say after a while.

“I love you, too. But where were we with your story?” Mingyu lets go of you and takes his mug once more. Leaves still fall from the trees. The streetlights glow brighter as midnight darkens. A green sedan stops directly across you both, and you watch as a man staggers out of the driver’s side.

“Well, if you really want to hear all about it, it would take us all night.” You look up at him with an enticing, hopeful smile. “Do you want to stay the night here? Hyewon and Joonyoung would be thrilled to have you. We can do storytime together with them.” You shake your head. “I still haven’t said a word to them about meeting Jeonghan again because we only went upstairs to get coffee. Hyewon will get a kick out of this.”

Mingyu laughs softly. “I can imagine.” He kisses your forehead before taking your hand. “Let’s head back inside.”

No more cars drive down your neighborhood street. No more hazy yellow and white headlights color the dark concrete road. Mingyu takes your hand and pulls you up from the steps. You feel him brush away some leaves from your hair once more. You look up at him appreciatively, and you do the same for him. Across the street, a glaring woman opens the front door for the drunken man from the green sedan.

You retreat indoors for the night. You think about how to tell Mingyu everything. And when Hyewon opens the door to greet you both, you wonder if she and Joonyoung would help you get the facts right about how you and Jeonghan started and how you and Jeonghan eventually ended.

With all these thoughts in your head, you faintly hear your phone ring in your purse. Getting a sense of déjà vu from the story that you had told Mingyu earlier, you feel chills run up and down your spine as you pull your phone out.

“Who’s your midnight caller, girlfriend?” Hyewon goodnaturedly teases as she takes your empty mug from your hand. Her face looks flushed, and you remember that she and Joonyoung had been drinking when you left them earlier. “Joonyoung! Mingyu’s here!”

“I have a confession to make,” you say as you look at the caller ID. “Mingyu and I ran into Jeonghan and Seungcheol at his cousin’s baby shower.”

Hyewon’s face pales at your words. “You what?”

“We did,” Mingyu says softly, scratching his head while smiling at Hyewon. “He’s a good hyung of mine and Aera’s in the industry. We’ve been friends for a long time, but I didn’t know that he and Y/N used to date.”

“Huh,” Hyewon breathes out. “All these years, the only way we could see him was on TV. We never ran across him, ever. And now we find out that he’s good friends with your boyfriend’s family.” Hyewon raises her eyebrows and shakes her head. “Imagine that.”

“You met Jeonghan?” Joonyoung bounds into the foyer, which suddenly becomes crowded with the four of you there. “Was he with anyone else?”

“Just him and Seungcheol-hyung,” Mingyu answers.

“Let’s not talk about this here. Come on in, you two. We still have some pizza, chicken, and beer.” Hyewon manages to push the two guys into the living room. She turns to you, clearly wanting to talk to you in private, but you put up a hand.

“Hold on.” Your phone is vibrating in your hand, and you hastily answer the call. “Hello?”

🍁🎧🧡

He leans on the railings of the rooftop bar, a drink in one hand and a phone in the other. As he gazes at the city below, he knows that he has had too much to drink. The lights have started to pulse too much. The numbness inside him has finally reached his fingertips. He considers stopping to drink this last glass, but his call finally goes through.

At the sound of the voice on the other line, he decides that he needs this one last shot of bourbon.

“I know that it’s too late to call you now,” he whispers almost inaudibly, “but if I don’t say this tonight, I probably never will.”

He lets go of the empty glass in his hand, and he watches as it shatters on the ground.

“I miss you,” he says, oblivious of the curses and complaints from the people around him. “And I know that you’re in a happy place now, but I—” A painful pause ensues as he stands there, lost for words. Shifting his weight from one foot to another, he tries to ignore the ache in his throat and the burning in his eyes. “—I just wanted you to know that. Everything about this call feels wrong because I know that I am not supposed to and that I have no right to call you anymore, but I will never stop wondering how these words sound like if I don’t say it right now.” A tortured grin spreads across his lips. “I miss you.”

The phone falls out of his hands, and he blindly falls to the ground to pick it up. Sharp fragments from the broken glass cut through his skin and the material of his pants, but he doesn’t feel the pain. He is too numb right now. He couldn’t even feel his legs. As he futilely tries to smoothen the cracked screen on his phone, he hears a loud voice coming from a megaphone.

“And cut!” The director’s voice rings loud and clear throughout the rooftop bar. He walks over to Jeonghan, who is still trying to bring his phone back to life. “Okay, did I suddenly step into some shitty romance movie after the break? What was all that?” The director impatiently turns around and gestures to the crew behind him. “I need a medical kit here; and another phone, please. Geez. What has gotten into you tonight?”

“Sorry,” Jeonghan says apologetically. “I just got too immersed with my role.” He shakily stands up. “And I can’t feel my legs.”

The director shakes his head. “Look, Jeonghan, I know that you love ad-libs. I love your ad-libs, too. You know that. But your last lines threw me off.” He squints his eyes suspiciously at Jeonghan. “Where did you go tonight? You were fine the whole day, and then you suddenly get picked up by your friend. The minute you come back to work, you’re a different person.” He shakes his head again and walks away. “Read the script and pull yourself together. We’ll be taking a short break. And apologize to your co-star for spouting out all that mushy stuff!”

“What was that about?” Seungcheol has appeared from out of nowhere, arms crossed. “Why were you telling Jihoon that you missed him?”

Jeonghan laughs. He gestures weakly with his hand as he answers, “It’s the bourbon.”

“Who on earth actually drinks half a dozen shots while filming?” Seungcheol pauses as he studies Jeonghan’s face. “And why are you crying?”

“I’m not.” Jeonghan wipes away something wet from his face. “Stop bitching, Cheol, and just help me sit down somewhere.”

“Oh, Yoon Jeonghan.” Seungcheol sighs as guides Jeonghan to the nearest steel chair. “You said you would be able to come back to work after the baby shower! God, I was an idiot for believing you.”

“This is not about the baby shower,” Jeonghan protests weakly as he leans back against the chair. “Leave me alone and let me rest. Please.” He closes his eyes.

“So," Seungcheol fishes around for words, "what was that about?"

Jeonghan doesn’t answer.

Seungcheol sighs again. “Was she the one you were ‘talking to’ in that phone call?”

Silence.

“Jeonghan—”

“—She looked happy.” Jeonghan’s voice is calm, but tears still escape his closed eyes. He leans to the side as though he wanted to sleep. “They looked happy. And when I saw them kiss by the front porch when we got to Aera’s, I felt funny." He grins. "I felt funny because a part of me got hurt—” He pounds his chest. “—Right here.” His grin widens. "I don't know. Maybe I'm just like this because I haven't seen her for a long time."

The rooftop bar is buzzing with activity: the director is making changes with the camera angles, someone is adjusting the brightness of the floodlights, and the extras are practicing the not-so-easy art of blending in with the scene. Jeonghan hears someone sweep the broken glass from the tiled floor.

“Mingyu is a good guy,” Seungcheol offers sympathetically. “At least we can both be sure that she will be alright.”

“Mm-hmm.” Jeonghan continues pounding his chest with his bandaged hand. “I know.”

“You are my first romance, and I’m willing to take a chance that till life is through, I’d still be loving you.”

🍁🎧🧡

The cobbled pavements of the narrow alley that he is walking on are still the same. It feels damp, even though no rain had poured that night. It is still chipped and uneven in some places, and he remembers how your thin-strapped sandals would sometimes slip and get stuck between the cobblestones. Despite the imperfections of this street, he knows that you loved it. But while you had loved this place for its bright lights and broken cobblestones, he had loved it for what it contained: the restaurants and thrift stores, all of which still had signs that flash in bright neon blues and violets.

And he loved them because of the memories he had created inside them—memories that he had made with you.

He vividly remembers the first plate of spaghetti that you shared at Georgie’s, a quaint restaurant that would have been considered Italian but for the sweet spaghetti sauce that it serves. He has not forgotten the taste because he still goes there on Thursdays. And he has never forgotten the way you had laughed while eating spaghetti as he confessed that he wanted to date you.

“You have no idea how ridiculous that sounds coming out of your mouth,” you had said while pushing away your plate. Your eyes had been gleaming with humor then, but your voice had been guarded and careful. “To put it simply, sunbae, I am not going to date you.” You had shrugged, and locks of your hair had tumbled across that denim jacket that he had loved seeing on you. “You know why.”

He had known then.

You had never fallen in love before. That knowledge should have made him cautious, but he admits to himself now that it had made him all the more desperate to snag that spot in your heart marked, “First Love.”

It was at Georgie’s that you had first rejected him, but it was there that you also said yes to him a few months later. Twirling pasta in your plate, you had murmured, “Okay. Let’s date. But Yoon Jeonghan—” Your voice had shaken. And then you had looked at him.

“Please be careful with my heart.”

He had answered that with your first kiss.

At signless thrift stores that are scattered a few stalls away from each other, Jeonghan remembers patiently waiting for you as you picked clothes for him and art supplies for yourself. He remembers how you would stand to the side to let Hyewon and Mirae haggle with the storekeeper. He remembers your apologetic expression when you felt like Hyewon or Mirae had taken the bargaining too far. He smiles as he remembers how embarrassed you would be during those times.

And then he smiles wider as he remembers Hyewon’s sharp fingernails that had dug on his shoulder when she pulled him aside during the first time he tagged along for the shopping. He chuckles as he remembers how menacing she had looked.

“If dating my goody-two-shoes Y/N is payback because I broke your best friend’s heart a few years ago,” Hyewon warns darkly, “then you’d better know that I’ll be coming for you. And I have no qualms whatsoever about tearing you to shreds. You got that?” She had dug her nails deeper at that point.

“I don’t care what history you had with my best friend,” he had answered calmly. “I am dating Y/N because I love her. That’s all there is. You’re reading way too much into this, Park Hyewon.”

“Am I?” Hyewon had scoffed, clearly unconvinced. “Yoon Jeonghan, why are you dating Y/N? The real reason, please."

"I love her," he repeated. "That's all."

"No. That's not it. I refuse to believe that’s your reason. And we both know here that you can’t fool me with that crap.” She had let go of him then, but not before throwing out a few more words that sounded like a prophecy. Throwing up her hands in the air and rolling her eyes, she had said, “I’m calling it: you’ll only break Y/N's heart.”

Funny how Hyewon turned out to be right.

“This alley is the most beautiful place to go to in the city, isn’t it?”

At that moment, Jeonghan stops in his tracks. He stops reminiscing.

He whirls around, his eyes wide and almost sober, searching for the owner of that voice. His heartbeats quicken. He clenches his jaw as another knife of pain stabs through him at those words.

You used to say the same thing to him. You used to say those words while holding his hand or whenever he would kiss you unannounced while you walked this street. You used to say those words while looking up at him. He would never get lost anywhere in the world, but he used to get lost in your eyes when you did so.

He squints his eyes, certain that it had been you who had spoken. But as his vision focuses on the owner of the voice, he feels his heart sink inside him.

Of course, it wasn’t you. Jeonghan laughs at himself and his stupidity.

It wasn’t you. It was some stupid co-ed echoing the words that any college student would say about this street. It wasn’t you because you were long gone from him now, and he had nothing left of you but all these memories that still plague him in this fucking alleyway.

It wasn’t you because Jeonghan had done what Hyewon had said that he would do.

A hand grabs his arm. “Let’s go, Yoon Jeonghan. You shouldn’t be here.”

Jeonghan recognizes Seungcheol’s voice. He grins at his friend’s frustrated face as he trips on a stupid loose cobblestone. “Hello, there. Why do you keep appearing out of nowhere? And did you also think of Hyewon while following me along this legendary street? You only loved this street because of Hyewon, but you still feel it, right?” Jeonghan helps himself up and absently studies his dirtied pants. “The nostalgia this place evokes?”

“Shut up,” Seungcheol snaps, “just shut up. You know, I expected you to act more maturely than this, Jeonghan.”

“What?” Jeonghan laughs. “Can’t a guy walk in peace?”

Seungcheol stops walking. He lets go of Jeonghan’s arm, and he faces Jeonghan with a furious expression. “You have no right to get hung up over Y/N,” he says with a poisonous tone. “You have no right at all.”

Seungcheol’s words slice through Jeonghan like a blade he didn’t see coming. He wasn't able to brace for it. He didn’t expect those words to come, especially from Seungcheol.

“You broke her heart.” Seungcheol’s tone is more fit for a eulogy than for a conversation with his best friend. “You made a choice years ago. What did you expect the ending to be? You can’t cry now.” His face softens. “Be a man. Accept that she’s moved on. Did you see her face earlier at the baby shower? She didn’t even look at you with any hurt or anger.” He presses a hand on Jeonghan’s shoulder. “She looks happy. Was she surprised to have seen you? Yes. But she has clearly moved on, and so should you.”

There is silence for a while until Seungcheol hands him a face mask.

"Spare yourself the hell you'd experience from gossip rags and wear the fucking mask. You look terrible and stupid, coming here without any disguise at all. These aren’t uni days anymore, dumbass."

The cobbled pavements of the narrow alley that Jeonghan and Seungcheol are walking on are still the same. It feels damp, even though no rain had poured that night. It is chipped and uneven in some places, and both men could still remember how easily one could trip and fall on the slippery cobblestones. But despite the imperfections of this street, they both know someone who had loved it for what it was.

Yes, you had loved this alleyway for its bright lights and broken cobblestones. Seungcheol had loved it because of your friend Hyewon, but Jeonghan had loved it for what it contained: the restaurants and thrift stores, all of which still had signs that flash in bright neon blues and violets.

And he loved them because of the memories he had created inside them—memories that he had made with you.

But now he realizes that this alleyway is a literal Memory Lane, bringing him back to the past and clouding his judgment of the present.

As he walks past Georgie’s, He remembers your words again.

“Please be careful with my heart.”

Friday has barely ended, and Saturday is just about to begin, but when Georgie’s fades behind him, he laughs. He laughs like the idiot that he is, and tears pour out of his eyes as he does so.

“I will be true to you—just a promise from you will do: from the very start, please be careful with my heart.”

🍁🎧🧡

The truth has finally hit him.

Everything that he had with you—all of it—is now just memories and history.

And his conviction that he should stop riding this rollercoaster of emotions about you becomes even more pronounced when his phone vibrates, and he picks up a call.

“Where are you?” a woman’s voice asks, worried. “I’ve been up all night waiting at your apartment.”

Seungcheol mouths, Who is it?

Jeonghan flashes the phone at Seungcheol.

It was Jung Mirae.

“I love you and you know I do—there’ll be no one else for me. I promise I’ll be always true, for the world and all to see. Love has heard some lies softly spoken, and I have had my heart badly broken; I’ve been burned and I’ve been hurt before.”

🍁🎧🧡

Mingyu stops staring at the ceiling and turns to look at you. You are sleeping beside him, tucked under his arm, and he is happy. He had spent the night with you, going through your memories and learning from them. He had spent the whole night immersed in the past that you had inside you.

Yes, indeed, he had learned a lot about you tonight. And as he presses a tender kiss to your forehead, he whispers something that you did not hear. He whispers words that he just wants to prove to you with actions.

“I’ll be careful with your heart,” Mingyu whispers as he kisses your hair, your neck, your bare shoulder, “because I know how it feels to get hurt, too.” If you had been awake at that point, you would have seen the pensive, faraway look in his eyes as he walks down his own cobblestoned path—his own Memory Lane. If you had been awake, you would have worried about his expression like he knows you would. So he quickly smiles at your peaceful, sleeping face.

“I have a story, too,” he adds softly, “but I’ll save it for later.” He hugs you close to him. “For now, I’ll just be content with taking care of you.” He kisses your lips, and you stir. “Of us.”

When your eyes open, he shyly ducks under the covers, his twinkling eyes peeking at you. And as you protest that it was late and that he should sleep, he laughs softly, and he nods. “Okay, okay. I’ll take care of you.”

“What?” you ask, uncomprehending. “Say again, baby?”

“Nothing.” He hugs you close again. “Just that I love you.”

You fall back into sleep at his words, and he keeps watching you until his eyes close on their own.

“I love you,” he whispers again.

“So I know just how you feel: trust that my love is real for you. I’ll be gentle with your heart—I’ll caress it like the morning dew. I’ll be right beside you forever, I won’t let our world fall apart. From the very start, I’ll be careful with your heart.”

Author’s Note: Thank you very much for reading! I know that I have been very slow and inconsistent with my updates, but as long as there are unfinished WIPs on this list, please expect me to keep posting, no matter how sporadic. Tell me what you think about this part on the askbox, comments/reblogs! Thank you! - Leanne.

#seventeen #seventeen scenarios #svtcreations #seventeen angst #yoon jeonghan #yoon jeonghan angst #jeonghan #jeonghan angst #svt scenarios #svt angst

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naktergalen · 4 years ago

Text

Rivamika Fic Suggestions List 2

Hey there again! It’s been a while since my last rivamika post and I apologies for that. I caught the reading bug and have just been hitting book after book. I might be doing a book of the month suggestion starting in March. I’m still thinking about it but if that is something your interested in let me know. Or if you just want book suggestions just message or ask me. But for now, I’m back with my second Rivamika Fic Suggestions List.

First of all, I want to thank you for all the comments and messages I received from my first list! I think it has over 150 notes now which is crazy for me. I was going to be ecstatic if it got like 10 likes or something hahaha! I’ve enjoyed talking to some of you about fics and other snk stuff. Feel free to do the same after this post! I know I take awhile to respond but swear I get there eventually.

Same rules as last time. I’ve split this list up into four categories. I wanted to let people know the status of some of these fics in case they did not want to start an incomplete or in progress story. All of these fics can be found on AO3. I’m going to try to link them but we will see how tumblr acts today. If you have any fic suggestions for me, feel free to message me with them and I can add them on to the next list. If any author sees their story on here and wants me to take it off the list, please let me know I don’t wish to make anyone feel uncomfortable. Also, last thing, I highly recommend leaving comments and kudos to the authors. I know that they greatly appreciate it and it helps them with improving their writing through feedback. Okay shutting up now, ON WITH THE LIST!

DISCLAIMER: I know that not all of these stories are not for everyone, these are just my opinions and suggestions.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Completed:

- Thunder Clouds

Author: K_Lionheart

Rating: Mature

Sometimes I like to go to the very back of the Rivamika archive on AO3 and look for fics that have gotten buried over time. Low and behold what I have found lol! I enjoyed the emotional roller coaster when I was reading this fic, though sometimes I wanted to pull my hair out. Set after the titans are gone, humanity has to repopulate so arranged couples by the monarch are made to be wed. While this new order is being enforced, Mikasa and Levi are trying to work out their strained relationship. A slow burn with angst that will have you staying up till 3am dying to know what happens next. I know that there is a sequel to this fic called Nimbus and I’m slowly working my way through that one. Honestly, it will probably go on my next list.

- Red is the Only Colour

Author: mongoose_bite

Rating: Mature

A cute fic that was a quick but wild ride. A Little Red Riding Hood type of AU where Mikasa is a hunter of some sorts traveling through a town. I don’t want to say how Levi plays into all of this since it gets border line spoilers but just know that he is there. It is an opening ending fic for the author to come back if they plan on doing so but it can be interpreted in different ways. All in all, a fic worth of the quick read.

- Sing Me a Song

Author: LazyTrash

Rating: Mature

First I have to get this off my chest, I love the author’s name hahaha! I freakin wished I would have thought of that for mine! Anyway, this fic is wonderful but I will warn you that its a gut punch. If you like hurt and angst put together, then this is the story for you. I love these types of fics because I adore them so much but they hurt me in my soul. I don’t know what that says about me but whatever. I don’t want to delve into the story too much for spoilers but I would suggest rivamika fans to check this one out.

- Midnight Musings

Author: Raewyll

Rating: Teen

I just started to read Raewyll’s fics so I’m slowly working my way through all her works. This one caught my eye and I had to read it. This is a cute take on a chance meeting through texting the wrong number. I love the way Levi and Mikasa’s relationship blossoms into something more serious after causally texting back and forth. It’s one of those stories that I can only describe as being cute as shit! I’m definitely going to be checking out more of Raewyll’s fic in the future.

Ongoing:

- Beyond the Walls

Author: helena3190

Rating: Matue

If you love RIvamika angst, then look no further than this baby right here. This is currently my favorite ongoing fic. It was supposed to be a shorter story, but the author keeps adding more chapters so I’m not complaining hahaha! This fic is pretty much how I would *personally* picture canon Mikasa on how she would deal with realizing that she’s falling in love with someone. Its mostly told in the perspective of Mikasa as she is dealing with the after effects of war and trying to figure out what should she do with her life now that she is no longer a solider. Her feeling for Levi come with a lot of confusion as she’s discovering emotions that she has never felt before. She has a hard time pinpointing on what exactly describes her relationship with him. I’m anxiously waiting for the final chapter for this fic and dying to see how it will end for Mikasa and Levi.

- After the War

Author: loneackerman

Rating: Mature

I am loving this rivamika slow burn fic right here. Its similar to Beyond the Walls but I think the author adds their own taste of the 1920s into it. Set after the war is over (obviously), Mikasa and Levi have to figure out what they are going to do the rest of their lives. It has great tension, a perfectly paced gradual romance and just the right amount of humor to combat the emotional turmoil it puts you through. Again in my opinion, this is close to how I would realistically perceive Levi and Mikasa’s relationship evolving. I’m really enjoying this story and I’m looking forward to more updates to come!

- The Sound of Lightning

Author: LycheeGreenTea

Rating: Mature

A new fic that is just getting started but I can tell that what the author has in store is going to be interesting. Set several years after the end of the war, Levi and Mikasa are loving parents to a single child. Their peaceful life comes to an end when the family has a threat against them. There are not many long fics about Mikasa and Levi being parent so I was very happy when this one popped up on the AO3 feed. An exciting adventure awaits the Ackerman family now and I can’t wait to see where this fic goes in the future. There are three chapters as of now so head over there and check it out.

Incomplete:

- Home

Author: MissErikaCourt

Rating: Mature

One of the gems I found when diving back into the Rivamika archive. Ugh I HATE that this fic is incomplete!!! Its a good long fic but I’m greedy and I need more! I will give a warning first that this fic does contain heavy themes. Mikasa and Levi are in the underground to fight against a criminal ring. This story is a slow burn with action and emotional trauma. There is a wonderfully written OC that you easily get attached to its not even funny. Even though its not completed, I would highly recommend checking it out. I still have three more chapters to finish but I had to put it on this list. I know that I’m going to be pissed once I reach the last chapter written. If someone know MissErikaCourt, let her know that she needs to comeback to finish this masterpiece!

- Shiver

Author: bornsinner

Rating: Mature

Another one that I DISPISE its incomplete!!! Ugh such a great Office AU. It’s everything that I would want in an Office AU setting. Mikasa struggles between her committed long term relationship and her growing attraction (which starts to develop into some feelings) to her boss, Levi. Its hot, sexy and intriguing and it pisses me off that its not finished! The author writes each chapter as a one-shot but collectively together they tell the whole story. Highly recommend even though its so short. BORNSINNER where ever you are in the universe I hope you come back to finish this!!!

- Two Lines

Author: Crejhov

Rating: Mature

When this was getting updated it was my favorite on-going Rivamika fic. I would find myself checking to see if the author updated with a new chapter every week! The unplanned pregnancy trope is a classic one, but Crejhov does a fantastic job on keeping readers enthralled with soo many anticipated character meet up that are bound to cause hurdles for our expecting parents. This story is told from the perspectives of Mikasa and Levi in order for us to understand where their mindsets are as they plan for their expecting child and deal with their relationship. AHHHHH I want more of this!!! I was soo excited to see where this awkward journey was going to take Mikasa and Levi. CREJHOV COME BACK PLEASE I KNOW YOU HAVE WORK BUT PLEAAASEEEE! I NEEEEEEDDDD!!!

- Cabin Fever

Author: AmayaOkami

Rating: Mature

All I should have to say about this is that its written by AmayaOkami and that should explain it. Amaya is the one that gave us the beautiful incomplete rivamika fic Romance and Rivalry. I just adore her writing. Levi and Mikasa relationship evolves as they are standing guard over the arrested Kenny Ackerman. Secrets are discover about the Ackermans and it gets pretty steamy between our two favs. Great fluff and great sexual tension that leaves you wanting more chapters! Again AmayaOkami where ever you went I hope for some miracle that you come back and complete this one too!

One-Shot:

- Jade

Author: shulkie

Rating: Mature

This one-shot feels like I read a novel, it has such a great storyline. An arranged marriage between Mikasa and Levi leaves the relationship strained in the beginning. Their relationship evolves over time as Levi patiently brings down Mikasa’s wall. With smut added for all of your one-shot needs. Definitely worth the read in my opinion.

- What Remains

Author: Mirime

Rating: Mature

This one-shot gives us a glimpse into the secret relationship that Levi and Mikasa have been having while there are still scouts. This fic is sad but I would say it has a bittersweet ending. I think this was supposed to be part of a collection but I can’t find the rest of them. Still a great read by itself.

- Agape

Author: alienheartattack (Sanneke)

Rating: Mature

This fic is cute as shit! A College AU where Mikasa and Levi are childhood friends. Levi has to deal with Mikasa being at the same college as him while he is struggling with his changing feelings towards a grown up Mikasa. Worth the read as I said cute as shit, leaves you all warm and fuzzy lol!

- As Seen in Shadows

Author: MoraLeeWright

Rating: Explicit

FUCKING MORA! LEE! WRIGHT! UFFFFGGHHH Fuck I’m in love with her writing style. I really have nothing to say more that just go read it! Its hot and sexy and the sexual tension is off the fucking charts in this one. Its just MoraLeeWright smut thats all I can say. It’s great! JUST READ IT LMAO!

- Remedy

Author: NSummer

Rating: Mature

Another hot smut one-shot coming your way! Levi and Mikasa have had an ongoing affair and this just recounts their first time together. Its just some good ol’ Rivamika smut that I think that everyone in this community would enjoy.

- Nutty: Drunk in Love

Author: Hallow17

Rating: Mature

A fun smut to read about Mikasa getting “revenge” on her asshole boss, Levi. Things don’t go the way she plans as things get a little heated in the sexy way. A quick smut that I think is perfect for a little Rivamika crave.

- Spicy: Jalapeno

Author: Hallow17

Rating: Explicit

Another fun smut to read by Hallow17. Levi has been stressed out at work and Mikasa finds a way to help him get his mind off it (if you know what i mean). Again perfect for a Rivamika quick fix.

#rivamika #rivamika fic #levimika #mikasa x levi #levi x mikasa #Levikasa #levi and mikasa #mikasa and levi

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misterewrites · 3 years ago

Text

Inhuman Interrogation (Welcome to the Underground!)

Hello everyone! E here hoping you are all safe and sound! Here’s the next chapter of the Underground! A special thank you to everyone who reads my stories. I know they’re not everyone’s speed and I get wordy but I really do appreciate it! I really hope you are having some fun with it. Okay stay safe, sound, keep your loved ones safe, wash your hands, wear masks and get yourself vaccinated, push for vaccines worldwide. Here's the next chapter, enjoy! Feel free to leave likes, tell your friends, reblog and leave feedback I love it all! have a good week and I'll see you later! E is out byeeeeee!

If you want an easier way to read my story here’s the newest chapter at ao3

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27814297/chapters/79942294

Curious what this about? Here’s the first chapter

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27814297/chapters/68094967

Want an overview of my works, you can find me right over here! Fun fact I do, on a occasion, write stuff for fandoms! Shocking I know :D

https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrE42/pseuds/MrE42

Summary: Oliver's been caught red handed and there's only one thing to do: Claw and lie his way out of the situation. However, the bard might be a little over his head from this stranger who watches all.

-----

Oliver could feel a chill run down his spine, fear gripping him tightly as he scrambled to keep himself calm. Being found out was always a possibility he’d calculated in his plans, he just hadn’t wanted to deal with it tonight. Well you know what they say: When life gives you lemons, squirt lemon juice in life’s eyes and run like hell.

He’d been caught so the next step was to determine by who.

Oliver blew cool air onto his face as he pivoted around to see which person had been acute enough to catch onto his antics.

He had been expected to looking at an unhappy Lea with his sword drawn.

What found waiting for him was worse.

It was good looking man though Oliver couldn’t hazard a guess to his age. His hair was short wispy dark brown like the color of copper. His face was scratched by dozens of tiny whites line, healed scars that somehow did not detract away from his handsomeness. He wore a plain white tunic with black leggings, a large bronze hued cape hung over his unusually thin frame. The most striking feature were his golden eyes. Not golden in shade but actual gold, metallic shimmering and shining like metal caught in the glow of the sun.

He was a sight to behold, perfection made flesh and blessed by the gods.

And Oliver knew he was utterly and terribly inhuman. He was not a mortal being for no human could ever been so perfect.

The Stranger tilted his head quizzically, his eyes dilated into pupil-less orbs.

“You” He spoke in a raspy, low voice “You’ve been busy.”

Oliver coughed, trying to get his dry throat working again.

The Stranger took a step closer, his gaze unflinching “Yes, very busy.”

Oliver chuckled nervously “I haven’t the slightest clue what you mean increasingly creepy man. If you excuse me.”

As Oliver turned to leave, his blood turned cold when the stranger harshly whispered, his words booming in Oliver’s ears.

“How’s Death I wonder? He’s an old friend for you, right?”

Oliver whirled around, fist clenched but the Stranger hadn’t taken a step forward. In fact he had taken a step away, furthering the distance between them.

Oliver gulped nervously, trying his best to stop his racing heart.

“And you” he murmured quietly, trying to hold onto his fleeting courage “Smell of it.”

It was true: Even this far away, Oliver could smell the stench of decay, of death and blood wafting off the Stranger as if he’d come straight from a bloody battle.

The Stranger made no indication he heard Oliver’s comment, just stared with golden eyes unblinking.

Oliver let out a tense breath before closing his eyes. He centered his will, he reached out into the universe and drew in the power of his magic.

He could hear the scrawling of a pen across the scratchy surface of parchment, the squishy wet sounds of paint drying, the tuning of a lute among excited laughter and cheers.

‘I need to escape.’ Oliver spoke in his mind.

Knowledge filled his mind: Spells and their uses. The hand gestures necessary to tug at the weave to make his will, his need a reality.

An unknown force guided his hand, raising it high and surging with magical power. Oliver’s eyes snapped open with a fierce determination. He took a deep breath, his fingers at the ready as he prepared to recite the incantation.

“I…” Oliver began when the Stranger struck. There was a blink and there was the stranger in front of him, his hand wrapped tightly around Oliver’s wrist.

“So.” the Stranger spoke in an oddly smooth voice “You ready to tell me what you were doing squirreling about?”

Oliver was strained against the Stranger but his grip was as strong as iron. Unless he could complete the hand gestures and motions along with the incantation, the spell was incomplete and he was as helpless as a kitten in Stranger’s grasp.

Oliver grimaced in pain “Now you’re remembering to be human? No creepy staring or awkward conversations about death?”

“Sorry, sometimes my lady speaks through me. I am her will incarnate on this plane.” The Stranger gave a sheepish grin

Oliver smiled uneasily “Right mysterious lady sure. That’s totally normal. How about you let me go and I won’t take the psychotic act personally?”

“But it is personal.” The Stranger’s smirk widen, his teeth too sharp to be mortal “You’re up to something and I’d like to know what.”

‘Great.’ Oliver thought to himself, his eyes darting about for a sign of assistance: a cloaked figure nearby fidgeted awkwardly but ultimately did nothing, a few nobles conveniently glanced the opposite direction of their altercation. Even the guards were nowhere in sight. Whoever this person was, he was the luckiest son of a bitch in the world.

Oliver pursed his lips, his mind desperately grasping at ideas to escape this situation.

“Party planner” Oliver offered helpfully “My job is to keep track of everything, make sure the party is moving smoothly and ensure there is no issues. You know how Mr. Brambleoak dislikes unnecessary distractions.”

The Stranger nodded in understanding “Party planner? That’s a good one. Feasible. If were I shade dumber, I might actually believe you. However…”

Oliver winced in pain as his grip tightened. The bard had been manhandled once or twice before but never this single handedly.

“Now” The Stranger’s golden eyes narrowed threateningly “Let’s try this one more time before you really anger my lady. What were you doing?”

Oliver opened his mouth.

“There you are!”

For one nerve wracking moment Oliver thought the Stranger had backup but he seemed just as confused as he was.

Maria cut in between two men gracefully and forced the Stranger to release his grip. He backed away as she linked herself arm in arm with Oliver.

“Sweetie!” She spoke with honeyed words, patting his arm lovingly “You ran off so quickly. I was worried I’d upset you.”

“Umm.” Oliver eyed the Stranger carefully, wary at any sudden movements “Sorry honey. This person thought I was someone he knew.”

Maria peered closer, getting a good look at the man.

The Stranger smiled cheekily “Fraid I got the wrong person.”

“You should really be careful, the guards here dislike any disturbance to the festivities.”

Almost as if magically summoned by her words, the guards began to approach with hands on their blades.

“Of course. Of course. Wouldn’t want trouble.” the Stranger bowed mockingly “Besides, I don’t think he’s the one I want.”

“That’s certainly ominous.” Oliver murmured under his breath.

Maria jabbed him with her elbow though her gaze never left the Stranger’s golden eyes.

“We should go.” Oliver offered helpfully “I think I’ve overstayed my welcome.”

Maria beamed cheerfully “No worries, I was feeling a bit tired myself. Good night good sir.”

“Bye.”

“Good night miss” the Stranger tilted his head “Bard.”

Maria hurriedly dragged Oliver away.

“Thanks for the save.” Oliver said gratefully.

Maria blew a strain of hair from her face “You’re welcome.”

“Not mad about using you as a distraction?”

“Normally I would be” Maria admitted “But that little stunt you pull got the harpies off my back for the rest of night.”

Oliver chuckled “Basking in the admiration of their adoring fans?”

“You have no idea.” she replied wearily “I’m just happy for a moment of peace. So thank you for that.”

“You are welcome then.”

The two made their way outside and straight into quite the scene: a massive cheering crowd formed around a handful of people. Most of the combatants were faced down, sprawled across the cobbled streets though Oliver spotted two familiar faces standing tall and victorious over their fallen foes.

“ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED!?” Terri screamed into the roaring masses, arms flexed. Tyrell looked like he was about to pass out from exhaustion.

Oliver spotted Lea among the thundering crowd, his eyes alive with excitement and joy.

Terri caught Oliver’s eye and gave a proud smile. Oliver offered a subtle thumbs up as Maria led him away from the bank.

“I take it you can’t go far.” Maria stated simply.

“No” Oliver spoke honestly “I’m afraid my business is not yet concluded.”

“Is it alright if I stay with you for now?”

Oliver bit his lip nervously “Sure. Of course. I have a moment. Not curious about what I was up to?”

Maria gave a cheeky smirk “Naturally but I have a feeling secrecy is important here. Better to not ask than force you to lie to me."

“Thank you. I don’t like lying to you.”

The two stood side by side, arms intertwined together in a quiet comfortable near silence.

Maria smiled softly “You know my father used to warn me about my sentimentality for people. About they would use it against me.”

“People like me?”

She smirked mischievously as she puffed out her chest, speaking in a mocking tone “There will come poet whose weapon is his word. He will slay you with his tongue.”

Oliver snorted loudly, trying to hide his flushing skin “Oh lei oh lai oh lord?”

“Oh quiet you.” Maria scolded with a chuckle “Surprise you didn’t take the set up.”

“Too easy.”

“Should I be offend?”

“I mean those are pretty good lyrics” Oliver replied, hand high in surrender “Surprised they came out of your father’s bitter lips.”

“I suppose everyone has their moments. However rare.”

“I suppose so.”

Maria’s hazel eyes met Oliver’s brown, curious yet expecting “Do you remember what you said to me two months ago? At the last competition?”

“Umm…” Oliver scratched his chin thoughtfully “I say a lot of things. You need to be specific.”

“That my voice was utterly angelic?”

“Ah, I didn’t think you actually heard me.” Oliver’s cheeks blushed a bright red.

Maria giggled sweetly “Did you mean it? What you said inside?”

“Yes” Oliver answered without hesitation “You don’t need them. You would be amazing by yourself.”

Maria’s smile was sad. She sighed tiredly as she threw a glance towards the bank “My father won’t let me but you knew that, didn’t you?”

Oliver nodded in confirmation.

“I feel like I am a disappointment. A puppet controlled by a father who craves nothing but influence and status.”

“You’re not.”

“How do you know?”

Oliver shifted uneasily.

“That’s what I thought bard. Nice try though.”

Oliver caught sight of Flora and Sel making their way outside, signaling the others the mission was complete. Terri and Tyrell broke free from the fight circle and began making their way towards the rendezvous point.

Maria slipped her arm out of his “It is time I suppose.”

“Enjoy your night off.” Oliver took her hand in his own and softly kissed it. Maria flushed a pink hue but still curtsy in response.

Oliver turned to face her, his eyes gentle and understanding “You aren’t a disappointment.”

Maria rolled her eyes “You don’t have to lie to me.”

“I’m not.” Oliver firmly stated.

Maria’s eyes stared quizzically into his “Certain, are you?”

Oliver cleared his throat “You aren’t a disappointment to me.”

“That’s sweet but I’m afraid I barely know you. Besides you’ve been a thorn in my father’s plans consistently. Technically, I shouldn’t be talking to you let alone assisting.”

Oliver gave an impish grin “Yet you are.”

“You are far too charming for your own good.” Maria frowned mockingly

“Nothing compared to you.”

“Sweet words are nothing without meaning beyond them bard.”

Oliver took a deep calming breath, struggling to get the words out before he lost his nerve “The boy who used to climb your fence still loves you.”

Maria’s eyes widen with confusion before realization dawned upon her hazel eyes “How did you…?”

but Oliver ran, bravery failing. He disappeared into the crowded streets without another word. He ducked and weaved through the people in case Maria decided to chase him though he doubt she would. Perhaps those words didn’t have the same weight as they once did. Oliver really did not want to stick around to find out. He shouldn’t have said anything but he’d never been good at keeping his mouth shut.

-----

It hadn’t taken long for Oliver to meet up with the rest of the crew. Everyone managed to gather in a nearby alley, their chatter excited and cheerful.

“Boss man!” Terri boomed, arms opened wide “WE DID IT! See the pile? Do I get results or do I get results?”

Oliver gave a weak chuckle “Yes you do. Remind me not to piss you off.”

“Damn straight.” Terri flexed unnecessarily once more. Flora gave a playful wink towards her girlfriend which turned Terri a lovely bright pink.

Tyrell looked haggard and sick “I never want to do that again. Ever.”

“You did amazingly Ty! You can be First Chair in no time if you keep this up!” Terri patted his back approvingly, Tyrell nearly went sprawling to the floor below.

Oliver gave a sharp whistle, grabbing the attention of everyone “We did great team and it was an honor to work with you. If you require my assistance, I’ll be in town for a few days at the Right Hook. Ask for Ollie.”

Terri slipped her hand into Flora’s “We won’t be in town much longer. We have business up north but we wish you well! Permission to leave?”

“Granted.” Oliver waved them off “No making out until you leave our sights.”

It was impossible to know who was a redder shade: Terri or Flora.

The pair bowed respectfully before taking their leave, Flora’s head resting lovingly on Terri’s shoulder. Oliver couldn’t help chuckle at Terri’s proud “And you didn’t poison anyone! Great work sweetheart!”

Oliver turned to the remaining two “Sel, destroy the paper and report back to the local Conductor. If there’s any more trouble come get me.”

Sel gave a single nod before disappearing into the crowded streets without another word.

“And me?” Tyrell whispered anxiously “What about me?”

“You.” Oliver stretched his neck, trying to relive the tension of the night “You’re gonna tell me how to get into the Clifftop Distract.”

“E-excuse me?”

Oliver waved his question off “Don’t even. I know you’re a noble born. Your clothes are way too nice to be a simple baker or blacksmith’s son. And barely frayed means you ran away from home recently.”

Tyrell glanced away, fidgeting nervously “You noticed?”

Oliver nodded.

“And you don’t care?”

“Not in the least” Oliver admitted honestly “You got into the Choir. That means you’re good in my book.”

“Thank you.” Tyrell smiled softly “I appreciate it. May I ask why you need to get into the Clifftop Distract?”

Oliver scratched the back of his neck sheepishly “Someone I know has business up there. Figured I might as well ask you to make our lives easier.”

“You’re a good friend.”

“I’m really not.” Oliver murmured quietly, unable to stare Tyrell in the eyes.

Tyrell shook his head is disagreement but didn’t press further “Every month they change the password. This month’s is Knightly Valor.”

“Knightly Valor, thank you.”

“No, thank you for not telling the others. May I go now?”

Oliver ruffled Tyrell’s hair playfully “Go on scamp.”

Tyrell bowed and with a skip in his step, made his way out of the alleyway.

Oliver stood there alone for a moment before turning towards the shadows.

“You gonna keep follow me or we’re finally going to talk?”

The figure did not break the silence of the night as they stepped out seemingly from darkness itself.

“You knew I was following you? Impressive given not many can sense my presence” the cloaked figured spoke. unable to keep the curiosity out of her voice.

“Mhm.” Oliver grunted “Ever since West End. You were in the bar the night Abigail and I hired Archie. I heard you moving about when we camped for the night, just down the tunnel out of sight. I assume you lost us when we went down the side tunnels and decided to stake out West Haven for us to pass through. You’ve been tailing me all night since I left the Right Hook.

The figure said nothing.

“That’s what I thought.” Oliver sighed tiredly “Alright, we gonna have a problem? I've had a long night and I've been threaten one times too many today.”

“No problem.” The figure muttered.

Oliver narrowed his eyes suspiciously “Then why show yourself?”

“You need to know my presence.”

Oliver sighed “You are being very cryptic.”

“Now you know how everyone else feels.”

Oliver smirked mockingly, unable to hide the sarcasm from his voice “Thanks, I hate it!”

“Be careful bard.” the figured glanced about, worried “Something is coming.”

“Nice and vague, thanks for the tip ninja.”

The figure shifted uncomfortably but remained silent.

“Fine, go on then if you're not gonna be any more helpful.” Oliver shook his head before closing his eyes. When he opened them, the figure was gone, upped and vanished into nothingness.

Oliver ran his hand through hair tiredly as he began making his way back to the Right Hook.

“And I still have to climb two stories. Fucking hell, what a night.”

#My work #Original Work #original story #welcome to the underground #Welcome to the underground!

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sheepfulsheepyardinspace · 4 years ago

Note

Do you have any Star Wars fanfic recommendations, or have a link to someone else's list? I really wanna veg out.

oh my god, DO I. this may have been the best ask in the world. i’m not really sure what u want a feel for, so i threw together some of my favorite longfics for maximum veg time from the ot/pt and links for swr and swtcw recs. they’re pretty much all luke-anakin/vader centric, since that’s kinda my bread and butter.

let’s start with frodogenic, who wrote the first longfic i ever read in sw and might be one of the funniest authors ever. they once reviewed my fanfic & i nearly cried from joy. anyway.

The Father, 284k+, complete. “Ten years after ROTS, tormenting nightmares of his unborn child drive Darth Vader to extraordinary measures with unexpectedly drastic consequences. Clearly, experience has taught Darth Vader nothing...”

this is my og star wars fic and boy oh boy is it amazing. i will never get over this. i don’t want to spoil anything but when i say the final chapters are great? i mean they’re legendary. sometimes i still think about them & wish upon a star that i could be such a great writer. vader’s amazing, han is spectacular, and the ocs are fantastic.

Far More Than Rubies, 70k+, complete. “Nine years after AOTC, tragedy revisits the Lars Homestead. Little Luke Skywalker is suddenly plunged into chaos as the rebel movements discover a secret military project that may make a crucial difference in the war with the Empire.”

the spiritual twin of The Father, FMTR takes a look at padmé’s character and relationship with both luke and anakin/vader that’s hard to beat. it’s darker and heavier than The Father, but it hits those same sweet, sweet emotional beats while raising the age-old question: if padmé had lived, what would she have done?

The Family Tree, 12k, complete. “In which Luke Skywalker is stranded in a tree waiting for a flash flood to recede. Too bad he's got company...”

okay, i admit, this isn’t a longfic, but it is a longshot, and it’s amazing. the imagery and description always blow me away, and the interaction (canon-compliant) between luke and vader just [chef’s kiss] get me. vader’s in full, glorious form, and it makes it all the harder when luke wrestles with the knowledge that vader is his father.

Sibling Revelry, 25k, complete. “After Bespin and before Endor, Darth Vader is shocked to discover that Luke and Leia are twins. He's even more shocked when Imperial Intelligence reports that Organa and Skywalker are, erm, a tad closer than previously suspected.”

this is complete crack and humor in the best way possible. it’s crack treated entirely seriously, and you will be in stitches, i promise. no matter how many times i’ve read this i break down.

KittandChips (@kittandchips) writes what i can only describe as food for the soul. the luke-vader interaction is insanely amazing, the world building of daily imperial life and imperial governance is amazing, and vader just has a special je ne sais quoi that u must read to understand––tragic, funny, and so, so fatherly. they’re currently rewriting the Force Bond Series to fit in with newer canon, so i will joyously binge reread the entire again (including the new Force Bond: Mustafar Weekend).

Force Bond 1: Orphan, 47k, complete. “After Owen and Beru are killed by a mysterious stranger, young Luke ends up as an orphan on Coruscant. It's a race against time as Obi-Wan struggles to find Luke before Vader realizes the boy is his son.”

Orphan kicks off the series, which tracks vader and luke’s relationship through the perils of luke’s teenagerhood while growing up under the eye of the emperor and imperial court. it’s filled with slow growth, struggle and misunderstandings as darth vader tries to single parent, and pay off in every installment. the entire series clocks in around 777k+ and is the most joyful, fulfilling reading you’ll ever have. promise.

darth-nickels (@darth--nickels) writes darker, twistier, and terribly, terribly heartwrenching aus. they’ve got a whole host, but let me introduce to my two favorites. also, check out their faux-academia on vader. it’s amazing and i love it, but i admit i am an academia hoe.

Dooku Captured, Pt 2, 16k, complete. “Dooku is taken alive onboard the Invisible Hand, and Sidious' web is torn. The Sith Lord wonders if death might have been preferable to clumsy interrogation by Anakin Skywalker.”

Dooku Captured is a longshot au told from Dooku’s pov which takes the beginning of ROTS and throws it on its head. it’s a fascinating outside perspective of anakin and obi-wan’s relationship and such and interesting examination of dooku’s psyche and especially his complex relationship with the jedi order, qui-gon, yoda, and palpatine. i cannot rec this one enough.

Black Mirror, 90k, incomplete. “The Ghost crew returns to the Lothal when they hear the Empire is investigating the Jedi Temple there. They learn Vader is alone and decide to take him out-- but what they find could change the course of Galactic history.”

Black Mirror diverges into swr territory, but make no mistake: this is entirely an examination of vader and, later, obi-wan as well as ahsoka. luke makes his appearance later in the game, and boy oh boy will you love luke’s portrayal is a microcosm of luke and vader’s relationship within canon. heed the tags, though.

jerseydevious ( @jerseydevious ) is, first and foremost, one of my favorite people on earth. secondly, though, she’s an amazing writer with a deep understanding of vader’s character and psyche, a flair for beautiful depictions, and the true ability to wring every emotion out of your body.

Two and a Half Men (with a baby), 13k, incomplete. “After a long day of bargaining with Hutts and attempting to ignore his past, Darth Vader is nearing the end of his rope. When he discovers his two-year-old son, it's the straw that breaks the semi-rational Sith Lord's back; in a rash act worthy of the Skywalker name, he scoops his son into his arms, steals a shuttle from his own fleet, and punches in random hyperspace coordinates to a destination on the other side of the galaxy. Unfortunately, father and son are not the only ones on the ship.”

Two and a Half Men will stick with you, dude. like no other. i promise. it’s a whirlwind ride with obi-wan, vader, and piett and as funny as it is heartbreaking. it touches on some heavy issues and doesn’t shy away from looking at the damage done to vader––again, heed the tags.

Helioseismology, 4k, complete. “Luke gets shot down on a supply run and caught in an ice storm. It's extremely lucky that his father followed him there.“

i’ll admit. im completely biased about this one because it was a birthday gift to me and i am sucker for litcherally anything when jd puts pen to paper, but believe me when i say you will be awed by the depth and tangled relationships between these luke and vader that jersey can illustrate in a stroke of the paintbrush. im love. always.

izzythehutt ( @izzythehutt ) i am blown away by the intricate dialogue and characterization, always. and the latin puns? im sold. im also a sucker for latin puns, but that’s a story for a different time.

In Loco Pirates, 34k, complete. “A down-on-his-luck Hondo Ohnaka manages to capture the unicorn of all bounties--Luke Skywalker, which sends Darth Vader, Lord of the Sith, on a painfully familiar trip to the planet Florrum to collect his prize. The failed negotiations leave Vader in the awkward position of being stuck in a besieged pirate bunker, trying to balance keeping his wayward child safe (and in his custody) with controlling the tongue of a loose-lipped pirate who--to the surprise of no one--has a bad habit of telling 'amusing' anecdotes from the Clone Wars.”

hondo, aka the best character of swtcw, is brought to life just as vividly on paper as on screen. his entire personality brings luke and vader’s difficulties in a sort of incredulous light, which makes it as funny as it is vulnerable and tragic. the sequel, Palpatine Ad Portas, brings piett into the spotlight, and oh man do his interactions with palpatine and vader bring u all the uncomfortable vibes. relish in it.

sparklight ( @littlesparklight ) man. lemme introduce u to an amazing prolific and detailed writer. i will never get over the series they’ve written & neither will u.

Where Our Intrepid Hero Doesn’t Get Away, 122k, incomplete. “One-shots surrounding either AU situations of canon/legends works where Luke would normally have gotten away (or Vader is simply inserted into the action to come pick his child up) but in these instances doesn't, or completely new scenarios of the same. There are no deep ruminations on consequences of the situations here, just our awful Sith dad picking his son up when he'd rather not be.”

exactly what it says on the tin. u know those glorious moments of fanfic where luke’s gotten captured and ur on pins and needles, waiting for vader to show up in a moment of dark glory? here’s the moment. here’s all the moments.

Space Race, 122k, incomplete. “Owen gives in to Luke's wish to attend the Imperial Academy and Obi-Wan is too late to avert it, though he's not too late to make sure Luke leaves Arkanis before Vader can gets his hands on him. Luke spends over a month running around the galaxy before his father gets him, and from there...”

this story relishes in chase and boy is it fun. it will keep you on the edge of your seat and it’s an amazing ride.

The Suns of Tatooine, 85k, complete. “Luke ends up on a moon swamped in dark side energy after a mission goes wrong, then his father appears... and then they go on a bit of a learning experience. This could've been the only thing that would come of getting through a Sith complex with his father, but thanks to going to free Han earlier than the gang did otherwise, more revelations are had. Will that change anything?”

this series is a thoughtful, contemplative piece examining the nature of the force and the relationship the skywalkers have with tatooine. the descriptions are beautiful, the inventiveness is amazing, and you’ll be thinking about it for long afterwards.

an additional few…

Between Flight and Longing; 34k, complete. “Luke Skywalker and Han Solo journey to the planet Balen'ar on a desperate mission and find more than they'd bargained for.”

a classic and it is for a reason. the interaction between han, luke, and vader is so spectacular and the slow trudge of going through the forest with your greatest enemy and best friend is something hilarious. the end is bittersweet and fantastic.

The Sith Who Brought Life Day, 13k, complete. “An Imperial officer loses a bet and has to get Darth Vader a present for Life Day.”

somewhere between terrifying and dull, this fic presents a canon-compliant look at the hunt for luke and the grinding wheels of the empire. the oc is amazing and it echoes in true star wars spirit: sometimes it’s just some dude who can change the galaxy.

Quintessence, 5k, complete. ‘“Well, Master, I think I’ve found the one positive aspect of this situation.” “Which is?” “The Temple won’t have to pay the costs for our funeral pyres.”’

pure hilarity and shenanigans abound in pre-aotc obi-wan and anakin hijink goodness. lemme tell u––u will deeply sympathize with mace windu afterwards. additionally, check out the rest of the author’s oneshots! they’re deeply thoughtful and the interactions the author writes between obi-wan and anakin are always gold.

some extras & shameless self-promotion

here’s a full list of recommendations for star wars rebels fanfic in case this is what you’re looking for (remember when this used to be a swr blog, lmao)

i’ve also written sw fanfic, both swr and luke-vader centric. drop by and tell me if it’s any good!

#also if anybody knows these authors' tumblr accounts pls lmk so i can link them #guys remember piett?#i miss piett #firmus piett #star wars #star wars fanfic #sw fanfic #sw fic #three two one boom #jerseydevious #luke skywalker #darth vader #anakin skywalker #star wars rebels #late-in-the-day #idk if any of these r new at all to anyone #but they r my faves :)

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writingfromkitchenator · 3 years ago

Text

Agathokakological

Artist: @dmsilvisart

Beta (if applicable): @emmagan

Rating: M

Word count: 13,829

Warnings: Blood, mentions of torture, violence, near death experience (major character), fatal injury, subtle loss of control from spell

Other important tags: Magic, canon divergence, powerful character, love spell, obsession, vaguely set during season 11, hidden past

Crowley x Original Female Character

Other characters: Sam, Dean, Castiel, Gabriel, Lucifer, Balthazar, Rowena, Chuck

AO3 Link

The absolutely amazing art is shared below! I cannot thank @dmsilvisart enough, I absolutely adore it!

Summary: After being hit by a love spell, Luna has to adapt herself quickly to try and prevent her past being brought to light, as well as stopping her friends from getting themselves killed. In a time of crisis she knows there’s only one person she can trust, as she always had, and Crowley finds that he still can’t tell her no.

The spell had been rushed, launched as a final distraction to ensure a getaway, and the fact that it made contact, was even better.

Just not for Luna.

She was unharmed, much to her initial surprise, but after a few moments, it began to sink in as to what the spell was actually effecting.

Castiel hauled her to her feet, earning a startled yelp, and he brushed her down rather roughly, surprising her completely. This behaviour was completely unlike the angel and she didn’t really know how to take it for a moment.

“Are you alright?” He asked. “She didn't hurt you did she?”

Luna managed to free herself from Castiel's grip, letting out a sigh as she heard the Winchester’s approaching. “I'm fine, I don't know what it did, or was meant to do, but I'm fine. I feel fine.”

Castiel stared at her, unconvinced, and she realised that there's something different about the way he looked at her.

Her gaze was dragged away by Sam and Dean bursting in.

“What happened?” Dean asked rather angrily, bee lining for her, his eyes doing a quick scan of her.

“Rowena got away,” Luna said. “Whatever spell she was intending to use on me, was incomplete, so it didn't work. I'm fine.”

Dean stopped short of her and Luna found herself looking at him and then to Sam. The same look was in their eyes as Castiel.

“Are you guys okay?” She asked, a worried feeling beginning to bubble up in her stomach.

“Just worried about you,” Sam said, finally putting his gun away. “I think it's time we got away from here. We can track down Rowena later.”

Luna was stunned when Castiel and Dean agreed. “We've been chasing her for months and you guys are going to call it quits? Just like that? For all we know, she’s just in the next room.”

“For now,” Dean said, he took her arm and started pulling her from the room. “But right now, we need to get you checked over and safe.”

She stopped dead, frowning, Dean looking back at her. “I told you guys, I'm fine, but the three of you are acting really weird. If I didn’t feel the impact, I would’ve said that the spell hit you.”

“I'm not acting weird,” Dean said, letting his hand drop. “But we do need to get out of here. The spell could have a delayed effect, the sooner we are safe, the sooner we can check.”

It didn't stick, something about the way he said it just didn't make sense, and Luna stared at him until he shrugged.

“Come on Luna,” Sam stepped in close. “I think we could all just use a moment to regather ourselves. We'll go get some food or drink or something.”

Luna had no idea what to say to this and even looking back at Castiel didn't help, his gaze intensely on her, as if he wanted to stride over and just teleport her away.

“Okay,” She said, but kept herself out of anyone's reach. “If you guys insist.”

It got even weirder when they made a stop at a gas station.

Luna ducked in to grab some snacks and she quickly took notice of the clerk’s eyes following her around the store. The hair on the back of her neck started to raise up, a million possibilities flooding through her mind.

She made her way to the register and as she put her collection of items down, the clerk interrupted her.

“Free of charge.” He said, his cheeks quickly flushing red as she met his gaze, an eyebrow raised.

“I'm sorry?”

He seemed to swallow a growing lump in his throat. “F-free of charge. Anything you want, you don't have to pay.”

Luna frowned. “I can't do that. How much do I owe you?”

“Nothing!” His voice rose an octave till he cleared his throat. “Anything for you.”

There it was again, that odd look in his eye, and something slowly began to dawn on her.

The bell sounded, Dean entering. “You all good Luna?”

“Uh huh,” Luna said slowly and looked back at her items. “You know what, don't worry about it.”

She left quickly, even as the clerk sputtered after her, the awkwardness leaving an odd weight on her shoulders.

Sam's frown was full of concern. “Are you okay?”

“No,” Luna said, quickly getting back in the car. “But leave it. I need to think.”

When Dean returned, he was ladened down with food.

“Seriously dude?” Sam asked as Dean dumped it all in the car.

“What?” Dean shrugged. “The guy was insistent, kept rambling on about not wanting Luna to starve. I don't know what you did to him before I walked in.”

“I didn't do anything,” She said, frustrated. “He wouldn't stop staring at me from the moment I walked in.”

Castiel, who, up until this point had remained obstinately silent, suddenly disappeared from the seat next to her, making her jump.

The three of them quickly looked over as there was a crash from the gas station, Castiel holding tight to the front of the shirt of the terrified clerk.

“Cas, what the hell man!” Dean was out first, quickly followed by Luna and Sam. “Put him down, he didn't do anything.”

Luna stared at the tenseness in Castiel, her previous theory slowly becoming more prominent.

“Cas, put him down.” She said firmly, earning the angels gaze. “I mean it Cas, staring is nothing to get upset over.”

Slowly, Castiel put the terrified young man down, an unmistakable look of anger in his eyes. “He made you uncomfortable.”

“I'm sorry!” The clerk squeaked.

“At the moment, all of you are making me uncomfortable,” Luna said, a little angrily. “Now, I don't know what's going on, but we're all going to calmly get into the Impala, and we're going to go home, got it?”

There was silence for a moment before Castiel nodded and Dean shrugged, both heading to the car.

Sam lingered behind her. “Luna-"

“Sam, if you dare ask if I'm okay, I will tell Dean to leave you here.” She said, quickly striding past him as his face flushed red, the doors closing behind them.

Silence sat heavily in the car all the way back to the bunker, the thought of chasing down Rowena long gone from any of their minds. Luna was now more concerned about whatever this spell was doing to those that were around her.

It wasn't until they pulled into the garage that Luna realised that there were going to be three more people in here to contend with, ones she currently didn't want to test her theory on.

Getting quickly from the car, ignoring the three men's looks, she hurried to her room and shut her door.

“The spell hadn't been ready,” She said to herself as started to pace. “So why do I have a feeling that this was still the intended effect?”

Luna knew magic, knew it better than most of them, she could recognise an incomplete spell when she heard and felt one, so why was this having so much effect on her? It didn’t make sense, she couldn’t understand it, but she knew that there was a good chance that she was going to have to try and fix this on her own.

“Hey sugar, what are you hiding in-”

She jumped as Gabriel popped into her room, stopping mid-sentence, his head tilting as he stared at her.

Luna groaned. “Oh Gabe, come on, I came in here so I wouldn’t be seen, not to mention the fact that I’ve asked you not to do that.”

Gabriel frowned slowly at this, and she could see his mind working, but there was no missing that now familiar look in his eyes. “Why would you not want to be seen?”

“Because something is happening, and I was trying to avoid anyone else being affected by it,” She said, a note of desperation in her voice. “I was hit by a spell and-”

“Are you alright?” He asked suddenly, looking her over quickly, as if expecting to see an injury. “You’re not hurt are you?”

“No!” Luna snapped and rolled her eyes. “For the last time, I’m fine! If you all actually listened to me-”

Her room disappeared around her and she froze, finding herself out in the main room of the bunker, all eyes turning to her.

“Oi, what did you knobs allow her to get hit by a spell for?” Gabriel asked Sam, Dean and Castiel angrily.

“We didn’t let her do anything,” Dean said, frowning. “Rowena got lucky.”

“She’s fine Gabriel,” Castiel said. “She assured us that she wasn’t hurt.”

“But who knows what else it’s doing to her!” He said and the four of them started to argue.

Luna was preoccupied though, very aware of the other two gazes now on her too. As cautiously as she can, she casts a look to the other side of the room, and refrains from flinching, both Balthazar and Lucifer staring at her. If she didn’t know any better, it was like the two of them were seeing her for the first time, much like Gabriel’s stare had been, and the more she thought about it, the more she thought that Castiel, Sam and Dean’s had been almost the same way, she just hadn’t been paying attention to it.

The one that scared her most was Lucifer, something dark in gaze, and she had to quickly drag herself back to the argument at hand as voices began to raise.

“Stop.” She said it so firmly and loudly that a silence sat in the room. “All of you will stop this right now.” They all stare at her and she takes a deep breath, trying to stop the racing of her heart. “Thank you. Now, and I’m going to make this very clear. Whatever your reactions and or feelings currently are about me, I believe that that has been from whatever spell Rowena hit me with. So, I need you all to calm down, and think rationally about this.”

Sam was first to react, frowning at her. “If the spell was affecting us, we’d know it Luna, and it hit you, not any of us.”

Luna shook her head. “Not necessarily Sam, it depends on the nature of the spell that she cast, and judging by what all of you have been doing since you saw me, it was to cause utter chaos.”

Another moment of silence passed through the room.

“I’m sorry,” Balthazar said finally. “Just what reaction am I meant to be having?”

She sighed. “That’s not helping. Don’t you think that I can see it all in you? You’ve all been acting differently since you’ve seen me after I was hit with that spell.” When they still all just looked unconvinced, she makes a frustrated grunt, glaring at Castiel, Sam and Dean. “Why do you think that that clerk reacted how he did? He saw me and something changed! Look at all the free food he gave us because of me!”

“Free petrol too,” Dean said, his grin quickly faltering at Luna’s glare. “Well what was I supposed to do? Leave him a credit card so he can charge me when he feels like it? He might’ve just been trying to get fired, you don’t know.”

“Fired, right.” Her gaze moved to Castiel. “And your reaction?”

Castiel’s cheeks tinged pink. “I didn’t like that he was making you uncomfortable.”

“Why was he making you uncomfortable?” Gabriel asked quickly.

“You don’t need to know.” Luna said quickly. “All you lot need to know is that it was because of the spell. Gabriel, you yourself were fine when you burst into my room, but as soon as you saw me-”

“How uncouth.” Balthazar said, looking at Gabriel. “I’m pretty sure she’s asked you not to do that.”

“Well, excuse me for being worried when she didn’t reappear with the three musketeers here.” Gabriel said hotly. “I don’t see either of you making an effort.”

Lucifer’s smirk set Luna’s teeth on edge. “What do we need to make an effort for? I do believe any decision that needs to be made, needs to be made by Luna.”

“And what makes you so sure she’ll pick you?” Gabriel asked, cutting Luna off. “The last I checked, she couldn’t stand your guts.”

“In all fairness Gabriel, she’s never really liked any of us,” Balthazar said. “If I do remember correctly, there have been a fair few colourfully worded insults thrown our way.”

“I’ve got a few more if you keep talking like I’m not here.” Luna growled, but they either ignored her or didn’t hear her.

Gabriel smirked. “And it’s absolutely killing you to admit that, isn’t it?”

“At least he will admit it,” Lucifer drawled. “Unlike you, constantly popping in and out of denial.”

“Denial? You’re really going to compare me to the Winchester’s and yourself?”

“Hey!”

“Well, you have spent enough time around them. I have more important things to worry about.”

“You guys don’t get to just put that on us. You lot are hardly perfect yourselves, even for angels.”

“That’s hardly fair Dean, you’ve tried to kill her before as well.”

“Because I was a demon!”

“And like that makes things any better.”

“Like she’s going to pick anyone that’s been down that road.”

“That makes you a saint in comparison doesn’t it?”

“I’m sure we could come to some sort of arrangement Sam, then we may just both get what we want.”

Back and forth the arguing went, each point making Luna just feel worse, both in anger and in the bad feeling sitting in her stomach. When she tried to talk again, and again her voice fell on deaf ears, she huffed and stormed back to her room.

In her room, she dug out a permanent marker and quickly drew a symbol on her door, and then shoved her dresser in front of it, ensuring that she wouldn’t have any visitors. It wasn’t perfect, and she knew that there was a chance she would need to get properly out eventually, but for now, it was enough to be able to think.

Luna sat on the edge of her bed, resting her head in her hands for a long moment. She was worried that the argument may get worse, but she also hoped that her presence not being there, would help ease the tension in the room.

She stared at the floor, unsure of where to start. The internet wasn’t going to be of much help, and all the books she could’ve needed were out with the others.

Huffing, she lets herself flop back onto the bed, working several options through her mind, each less impressive than the last, until she finally had a thought on one person that would potentially be able to help. Whether he would or not, would be another question. It wasn’t that they had a bad relationship or anything, in fact, she’d probably known him the longest out of anyone, but it was more she didn’t know how far she could push the friendship.

Crowley had looked at her like she was crazy, and while she knew it definitely wasn’t a normal request, she was fully in her right mind. “This is important Crowley.”

“I had figured,” He said calmly enough, but it was clear that he was a little on edge. “You do realise though what sort of target this is going to put on you?”

Luna shrugged. “No one knows me bar you, maybe the princes, but none of them have really been seen in years bar Azazel.”

He remained unconvinced. “And Lilith?”

“Okay, and Lilith,” Luna huffed. “Honestly Crowley, I don’t give a damned about any of them. None of them know this. That’s all that matters. None of them control me and you are the closest one I know to be able to trust you with this.”

“Terrible idea really.” Crowley said flatly. “No matter how much I know you’ll torture me if it ever gets out.”

Luna sighed heavily, scowling at him, losing patience. “Look, will you do it or not?”

Crowley pursed his lips, thinking for a moment longer before he nodded. “I’ll do it, but I want you to know, I do not like it.”

“And your price?”

“I’ll think of something,” He said with a casual shrug, his usual smirk tugging at his lips. “For now, though, let’s just leave it at that.”

Luna shook her head of the memory, just one of the many that she had, some not so peaceful. She didn’t know why, but she had to keep believing that Crowley would help, no matter what, because the danger of thinking otherwise was something she wasn’t sure she could face.

Hesitantly, she took out her phone and scrolled through till she found his name. She had no idea how to start a message, just staring at it for a long moment, until she knew that she would have to get straight to the point.

It seems your mother has given me a wonderful gift after hitting me with a spell. I’m sure that’s bringing up all sorts of questions in itself, but let me just say that 1. Don’t come and see me, and 2. It’s a pain in the arse; I’ve got six men arguing over it already and a store clerk that couldn’t stop staring. Can you help?

Luna hit send before she talked herself out of it, and then held her breath as she waited for a response.

She was pleased when it didn’t take long.

That’s awfully vague and amusing. I take it the whole not seeing you part is from the effects of the spell?

She lets out a breath and feels herself finally relax slightly since all this started.

Good guess. I’m almost worried that they’ll start killing each other, but if I can get rid of this spell, then hopefully I can stop that too.

I don’t know, sounds like an ideal scenario to me.

There was a loud crash outside, making Luna jump.

“Ow!” Gabriel’s voice said. “Why would you lock us out Luna?”

“Because I have more important things to deal with than listening to you lot argue over me,” She said hotly. “So you’ll all just leave me alone, got it?”

“Come on sug-”

“No Gabriel. Go away.”

She turned back to her phone. I’m sure it does, but it’s not for me. I’m almost 100% sure that Lucifer would ensure it was him that would win.

There was a long moment of silence to this, one that had Luna more than a little nervous.

That’s hardly going to be good for anyone.

No shit Crowley. Can you help or not? I'm a little stuck here.

Isn't it a good thing I owe you favour?

She sighed at this, knowing that it would come up. It had been Crowley that had introduced her to the Winchester's, the two of them having worked together on a few things before, although neither of them were particularly happy about it.

When she made friends with them, he was nothing short of amused, and while it didn't change much between them, it changed enough.

It might just be enough for us to be back to even.

Crowley smiled at the message and shook his head. “Ah love, if only you knew.”

Leave it with me.

Without much thought, he teleported to the bunker, and he actually took a moment to look at the six men sitting there, all looking rather miserable.

“Having a pity party are we?” He asked.

He knew it was bad when no one, not even Dean or Lucifer, said anything smart back.

Sam sighed, shifting uncomfortably in his chair. “Luna is locked in her room. It seems we succeeded in upsetting her.”

Crowley raised an eyebrow. “And this is a good reason for the mood because...”

“Why do you think Crowley?” Dean huffed, picking at the label of his beer. “What are you even doing here?”

“Entertaining myself,” He said lightly, although he was currently thinking back to her messages. “A little birdy told me you were all miserable sods, so I came to see for myself. I can’t say I’m disappointed.”

When he still didn't receive any sort of response, he knew things were bad, and as much as Luna had warned him, he needed to see her to be able to tell just what sort of spell was at work.

“Hello darling,” He said, appearing in her room, making her jump. “I have to say, you have wonderful company.”

Luna was instantly anxious, as if expecting something to happen as she looked at him. “Crowley, I told you not to come and see me.”

“I know,” He said. “But if you want me to find out what's going on and how to undo this spell, then I'm going to have to try and work out what's hit you in the first place.”

She stared at him for a long moment, searching his eyes. “You're not...affected?”

Crowley tilted his head. “You seem completely normal to me love. I certainly don't see any need to be wallowing in my own pity like that lot are.” He smirked. “Maybe I should take a few videos, it is quite amusing.”

“I would much rather not have any memories of this, thank you.” Luna said, looking miserable and frustrated. “At least I know they aren’t fighting anymore.”

“Then I definitely would’ve taken videos.”

Luna sighed but finally smiled a little at him. “Cute Crowley. Do you have any idea what this is like? I feel like I’ve become the centre of their whole attention.”

Crowley hummed in thought, looking her over. “Well, whatever magic has hit you is currently hidden from me, which means there is a good chance that we are going to need my mother to remove it. Do you feel any different?”

She shook her head. “No, nothing. The spell winded me for a moment and knocked me back, but that’s it. I would’ve said it was incomplete, but the longer that this goes on, the more I’m doubting what I saw and heard.”

“Which was?”

She repeated what she heard Rowena say, or, as close as she could remember it. With all the current distractions, it hadn’t been a top priority, and when Rowena had even hit her with the spell, she’d been more occupied in trying to take the witch down.

Crowley thinks again. “Alright, give me a moment.”

He reappeared back with the others, all still looking rather miserable. Dean had successfully peeled the label of off his beer and was now spinning the bottle on the table. Sam was trying to keep himself focused on the book in front of him, but it didn’t stop him constantly looking up or rubbing the back of his neck.

Castiel seemed content to stare at the floor where he was sitting, his foot tapping occasionally. Gabriel stared down the hall and Crowley just knew that he was itching to see Luna. Balthazar hummed away to himself, pretending to be distracted by a glass of wine and a book, and it seemed that Lucifer was intent on staring at him, trying to be annoyed.

“What is wrong with you all?” Crowley asked, finally, understanding Luna’s discomfort, an odd air sitting in the room. “What is going through your heads to just be sitting here doing nothing?”

There were a few shared glances, but it was Gabriel who answered, finally breaking his gaze away from the doorway.

“You’ve seen her,” He said, sounding miserable. “Don’t you feel it too? We love her.”

Crowley blinked. “I’m sorry?”

“I love Luna.” Gabriel said loudly, standing and puffing his chest out with pride. “And I’d like to see any of you challenge it.”

Dean glared at him. “Dude, we all love Luna, and it’s not a competition.”

Murmured agreements came from all of them and Crowley couldn’t help but stare at them, it slowly clicking that Luna had realised this already, which was why she’d asked him not to see her.

But then, why hadn’t he been affected? They had known each other a long time now, but Gabriel and Lucifer were archangels, they were meant to be some of the most powerful beings there were. He had little doubt that this was no simple spell, especially to provide such a result, but it was certainly nothing he’d heard about before, which was no small feat. Luna was the only person that had ever done such a thing before.

“How did you even find such magic?” Crowley asked frowning, but then shook his head, a little angry. “Don’t answer that. Why would want to go through with such magic?”

Luna wouldn’t look at him and this bothered him even more. “You don’t know what it’s like Crowley. None of you do. This is the only option I have.”

“Only option…Luna, there is nothing wrong with you now.”

She shook her head, giving him a small smile. “You are saying that simply because of how much I’ve done for you lately.”

“Rather effortlessly,” He said flatly. “But that is beside the point. You were naught but rumour and speculation when I was first thrown into this hole, and I have told you since I found you that you have potential to take the top bloody job if you wanted to. There is nothing wrong with that.”

“I don’t want the top job,” Luna said, her eyes flashing in anger for a moment so she dragged her gaze away. “I want to be normal.”

“Normal is boring darling.” Crowley said. “You cannot ask this of me.”

“It’s going to take me time to gather what I need anyway,” Luna said, turning away. “Think about it Crowley. I’d rather not do this alone.”

Crowley had watched her go, had felt helpless to do anything, and had a growing worry that this was going to be something well out of his control, not that she was anyway. Somehow, the whole time they had known each other, they had just worked off of a healthy respect of the other.

He admired her strength. She admired his tenacity.

Crowley continued staring at the men in the room, a brief thought flickering through his mind, about how that hadn’t changed between them, even though it really should have. He quickly forced it away though, wanting to deal with the problem at hand.

“Right,” Crowley said, a little slowly. “And this has all been since you’ve seen her after she was hit the spell?”

“Well, you should bloody know,” Dean growled. “You’ve seen her too.”

“Of course,” Crowley lied. “Just making sure. You do all realise that this is magic at work?”

There was a mumble around the room and Crowley’s frowned deepened.

“It feels like I’ve felt like this forever,” Castiel spoke up finally. “Every memory I have with her just makes me…makes me feel…”

Sam looked up, interrupting Castiel. “You can see her right Crowley? She hasn’t blocked you from her room? Maybe you can tell her that we’re sorry?”

Crowley stared for a long moment before shaking his head. “I am not an errand boy Moose, so that’s no can do. In fact, her and I have something much important to attend-”

His words stuck in his throat and he could feel Lucifer’s gaze burning into him, a curl in his lip as he snarled. “Watch your tongue dog, or I may just rip it out.”

Pain flared in his throat and Crowley held up a hand, it easing away just enough so he can talk. “I’ll do what I can to help, but you lot need to not intervene. She’s upset enough with you already.”

Lucifer stared at him coldly for a few more moments before letting him go, Crowley instantly teleporting back to Luna.

“It’s a love spell,” He said as she stared at him. “A rather powerful one too. They’re all practically ready to fall at your feet.”

“I was afraid of that,” Luna sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. “It is actually bad enough that they’ll start killing each other eventually right?”

Crowley nodded, adjusting the collar of his shirt. “Considering Lucifer almost killed me for just mentioning spending time with you, yes. I won’t go back in there in a hurry.”

Luna flinched. “Sorry. I didn’t think it would put your life in danger.”

He tried to shrug it off. “It’s witchcraft darling, if that’s not life threatening, I don’t know what is. The question now is, how can we fix this before it gets that far?”

“Well, unless you know of another powerful witch, then we’re going to have to find your mother.” She said, even as he looked less than impressed. “I don’t like it either, she’s already hit me once today.”

They were cut off by a knock on the door, Sam’s voice coming through. “Luna, can we talk please? I’m sorry about all this.”

Luna sighed. “Now is not a good time Sam, maybe in an hour or so.”

“Look, whatever is going on, we just want to help,” Sam said earnestly. “Maybe I can even just look through some books for you?”

Crowley rolled his eyes, but Luna held up her hand, stopping him.

“Could you do that for me Sam?” Luna asked. “Do you know of any books that have anything on love spells?”

“Love spells?” Sam echoed for a moment. “Maybe, I’ll have to check to be sure, I know there’s at least one potion, but spells…”

“That would be great if you could do that for me Sam,” Luna said softly, making Crowley fold his arms. “Just…don’t tell the others. This spell is going to get worse before it gets better. I don’t…need anyone fighting over me.”

“I’ll see what I can find Luna.” Sam said and they heard him walk away.

Crowley stared at her, making her roll her eyes.

“Don’t look at me like that,” She said, gathering a few things from her draws. “You and I both know that Sam is good at this. If he can find something before the two of us find Rowena, then so be it.”

“And I thought I was the manipulative one,” Crowley said, but he doesn’t miss the slight awkwardness in her look. “And who said you were coming with me?”

Luna frowned. “Come on Crowley, you know that it’ll be easier to find her with both of us, not to mention dealing with her and getting her to remove the spell. Plus,” She glanced at the door. “I really don’t want to stay here with that lot, especially if things start to go bad.”

“Are you running from the danger or towards it?”

��It’s a rock and hard place and you know it.”

Crowley chuckled and took her arm, the two of them teleporting away from the bunker.

The last place Crowley had ever thought to look was in some small backwater town in outback Australia, and yet, this was where all the small clues he’d scrounged up had led him. Almost instantly, his nose screwed up at the heat, far too reminiscent of Hell for his liking, and then he stared at the dirt and the dust and sighed.

If someone was pulling his leg, there was going to be hell to pay for this.

It only took a few questions before he found what he was looking for, and he went out into the very emptiness of the area, just making out a small house in the distance. He was quick to make his way over, but he quickly froze, staring at the shotgun pointed at him.

“I know it won’t do much,” Luna said coldly, sitting in a chair on the porch. “But it will certainly make me feel a lot better. Get lost before I make you.”

Crowley held up his hands. “Now, now, that’s hardly a way to greet a guest.”

“Guests are invited,” She snarled. “And you were definitely not invited. I won’t tell you again.”

“I promise I’m just here to talk,” Crowley said slowly. “And I’m the only one that knows you’re here bar rumour and specula-”

The gun went off and he staggered back several steps, before he sighed. “-tion. Was that really necessary? That does still sting.”

“And I warned you.” Luna reloaded. “I won’t hesitate to shoot you again.”

Crowley pursed his lips. “Well, I guess I’ll just go and report to Lilith and Azazel where you are then. They were the ones that put me on the trail of this to begin with.”

Luna stared at him for a long moment before she slowly lowered the gun. “Why wouldn’t you report to them anyway? Seems odd for a low little demon to disobey his betters, especially when it could get him killed.”

“Low little demon indeed,” He brushed down his suit, annoyed as he looked at the holes now scattered through it. “I didn’t get this job just for the fun of it darling. I’ve worked quickly through the ranks and I’d like to keep it that way, which means I need others outside of the ranks of Hell too.”

She took a moment to process this, observing him, and Crowley waited as patiently as he could, trying not to squirm under her gaze, knowing she was seeing a lot more than he would’ve liked.

Finally, she chuckled. “Alright little demon, what do you want from me?”

“Obligatory question first, even though I know what the answer will be.” Crowley said. “Will you come to Hell and help Azazel with his plan?”

“Nope.”

“Right,” Crowley nodded. “See, normal conversation isn’t so hard is it?”

Luna just raised an eyebrow at him.

“Right,” He said again. “Second question. What are you doing in this god forsaken place?”

“Staying out of the way and passing the time,” Luna said simply. “It might be hot, but I’m less likely to come across demons accidently, until you of course.”

“There’s nothing out here,” Crowley frowned, but shook his head. “Whatever. Now that those two are out of the way, would you be willing to work with me?”

“And what would you offer in return?” Luna waved her hand as he went to speak. “Don’t feed me bullshit about keeping me hidden, I’ve been doing that well enough since I escaped Hell, and certainly don’t feed me anything about protecting me, I could smoke you where you stand.”

Crowley refrained from smirking. “I know where the witch is, or at least, rumours of where she was last.”

He got the exact reaction he was looking for, Luna tensing and slowly leaning forward in her chair, suddenly taking this much more seriously. “Is that so?”

“I found you, didn’t I?” Crowley asked innocently. “A witch should be no problem after you.”

“And just what exactly do you know of witches?” Luna asked. “Not to mention, how do you know you can find her when I couldn’t?”

“I have my sources,” Crowley said. “I thought the more pressing question you would’ve asked would be how did I know exactly who you are?”

“I’ll get to that.” Luna stood, and gestures to the front door. “But you might as well come inside first. I hate to think of any other demon or angel getting a whiff of me here talking to you.”

He blinked, having not expected this so quickly. “Just like that? You also don’t even know what I wish of you.”

She smirked back at him. “Unless you’d rather stand out in the sunshine Crowley? I’m sure a heavy sunburn would suit you.”

Crowley stared after her for a long moment before it clicked she knew who he was too, but then he grinned and followed.

The two of them appeared in the warehouse that they’d been at earlier, Luna letting out a steadying breath as Crowley lets her go.

“That’s still mind spinning,” She said. “No matter how many times you’ve done it.”

“We’ll, there is an easy solution to that,” Crowley said, but then looked around the space. “So where did dear old mother get too?”

“She ran out that door,” Luna pointed to the side of the room, ignoring his first comment. “After hitting me with the spell. Of course, those three were more worried about me than following her as soon as they saw me.”

They moved to the room, to see a small puddle of blood on the floor, Crowley raised an eyebrow.

“I may have shot her,” Luna said a little sheepishly. “The bullet grazed her leg, or, that’s what I thought.”

“Oh, you won’t find me complaining,” Crowley said rather cheerfully, seeing small spots of blood on the floor. “And look, we even have a trail to follow.”

Luna smiled and shook her head as she followed after him. That would definitely never be a relationship she understood, if it could even be called that at this point. Like most of their odd little group, they always seemed reluctant to kill each other.

“I still can’t believe you let yourself get hit by a spell,” He said casually as they walked together, following the faint trail of blood. “Another spell. After everything you’ve been through, I thought you were actively avoiding anything with witches.”

“I was,” Luna said. “But when the boys practically begged for my help in pinning Rowena down, I could hardly say no, no matter how much I wanted to. I never thought I’d end up on the end of another one though. It’s certainly not preferable, and I still can’t decide whether it was better or worse than the first one I got hit with. At least the second was what I wanted.”

“You could just break that one,” He said, watching her out of the corner of his eye. “And then break this one yourself.”

“And bring an even bigger mess back? I’m good.” Luna said. “It took me too long to do what I did in the first place Crowley, I’m hardly going to tear it down just like that. You know that.”

“Shame,” He sighed. “It’d be good to have you back at your full potential.”

“You mean it would be good to have someone powerful on your side again?” She asked, grinning as he shot her a look. “Come on Crowley, you can admit it to me, I’m not an idiot.”

Crowley snorted. “I would never say such a thing.”

“As in you won’t admit it or won’t call me an idiot?”

The blood trail ends and Crowley frowned at her. “Can we get back on the task at hand please? I can’t say how long we’ll be left alone out here, especially considering two of those currently in love with you are archangels.”

“You don’t need to remind me,” Luna chuckled. “But there is one more thing I have to ask.”

Crowley paused and frowned, a trickle of worry rolling down his spine, although he wasn’t entirely sure why. It had been some time now since she could see things in him, but he currently had nothing to hide, so it was an irrational thought. “What?”

“Did you ever tell anybody?” She asked, smiling. “That wasn’t so painful a question now, was it?”

He stared at her for a moment before he sighed and gave a small chuckle. “No and no. Considering I helped you…put it away, I hardly want to be facing any fall back for it, and with the attention you’re now receiving, it is an uncomfortable thought that any of them could find out.”

Luna nodded, still smiling. “I guess we should hurry it along then. All the angels do have the capability of finding out of course. In all honesty, I’m actually surprised that they haven’t.”

“They aren’t the brightest.”

She laughed. “True, but do be careful not to push that line too far.”

Crowley rolled his eyes and let her lead through the closest door to look for anything further on where Rowena could've gone, his eyes following after her.

Worry sat in his stomach, and had he not been a demon, would've made him feel rather ill. The thought that anyone else could find out about her, could understand or undo what had happened, he wasn't entirely sure he could live with that scenario. It was irrational, considering the ease of the alliance that they had over the years and into now, but this had been something that was her choice. He’d hate to see that taken away.

“You wanted immortality.” Luna growled low, approaching the wounded and terrified witch. “You wanted to survive the world through the ages, and yet you cursed someone like me to Hell. I hate to tell you this, but that was the stupidest thing you could’ve ever done.”

The witch tried to straighten out, tried to get her bearings again, but as soon as she met Luna’s black eyed gaze, her courage faltered. “Please…”

Luna snarled and grabbed the witch by the throat, pinning her to the wall. “Please? Do I look like I care about your pleas? Now, where is it?”

She whimpered, holding her tongue.

“Oh, so you were courageous enough to kill me when I was human,” Luna said coldly. “But now that I come back practically as death itself, you are nothing but a snivelling coward.”

“What do you want from me?” She managed to get out.

“I want it back.” Luna spat. “What do you think I want?”

“B-but you can’t use it anymore…”

“Do I look like a give a damn?” Luna snarled. “Your death is going to be slow and painful, that I promise, but you can save yourself a whole lot of torture beforehand by giving me what I want now.”

Tears filled the witch’s eyes. “Please…please don’t kill me…”

“You don’t get to ask me that.”

The witch’s screams were more than satisfying for Crowley, but he still couldn’t help but frown, not realising that the witch would have anything she could’ve taken from Luna when she cursed her. It was a development that he hadn’t been expecting. As far as he’d been concerned, the two of them had been more than honest with each other during all this build up to here.

Now he was questioning everything.

The fight the witch had put up had been a decent one, but it was quickly clear that she was no match for Luna, and it was really the first time that Crowley had seen her use any sort of her power to its full capabilities. He had little doubt that she was the strongest demon to have ever existed, which was both dangerous and exciting. He was the only one that knew she still existed.

But now he couldn’t help but wonder if she’d tell him exactly what was going on.

The screaming stopped, turning into wheezing sobs and Crowley watched Luna tuck something quickly into her pocket.

“There, now that wasn’t so hard, was it?” Luna said coldly. “You witch’s all think that having magic makes you untouchable, that it gives the right to do as you please without consequences. Well, guess what, I’m the consequence.”

Luna stepped back, letting the witch slump to the ground, letting a silence fall for a long moment.

“Would you like anything done with her?” Crowley asked.

“I’m thinking.” Luna said, glancing at him. “I don’t suppose Hell would take a witch for a while?”

Crowley smirked, knowing where she was going with this. “I’m sure I can come up with something.”

The witch tried to mumble something that sounded like ‘no’, but they both ignored her.

“Good,” Luna turned away from her. “I’ll be happy if I never have to see her again. I’ll leave that to you, of course, right now, I need to get away.”

He didn’t have a chance to say anything, Luna disappearing, and leaving him less than pleased. The witch continued to sob and for a long moment, Crowley thought.

“What was she after?” Crowley asked. “What was it that you took from her?”

Crowley had been less than pleased when the witch had told him what it was, happily locking her away in Hell with an excuse he could no longer remember. The harder part now, apart from trying not to be angry at Luna, was trying to find out how it gotten that far in the beginning. He spent a long time thinking of a way to broach the subject, but as it turned out, she approached him first, asking him to look after it.

Which he still wasn’t happy about, especially when she turned herself human.

And yet, here he was, still by her side helping her with whatever she needed.

His thoughts lingered on it all for a long moment, watching as she followed the blood trail, and again, that thought came up and niggled him, causing him to internally scowl at himself and push it away once again.

The blood trail disappeared in one of the back rooms, and they could both tell that Rowena had stopped to either heal or bandage the wound. They hoped that she wouldn’t have gone far.

“Crowley,” Luna said slowly, a frown coming to her, the thought just occurring to her. “You don’t think Rowena knows, do you?”

He didn’t like the idea any more than her. “I don’t see how she would, and if she did, I’d like to think she had something more impressive than a half formed love spell up her sleeve.”

Luna looked about as convinced as he felt, and as much as he wouldn’t argue with her returning to what she was, he also knew that there were a fair few dangers involved with it.

“Right,” Luna sighed and then tugged a small bag out of her pocket, Crowley raising an eyebrow at her, making her give a small smile. “Don’t give me that. I do what I have to do survive.”

“That I know,” He said flatly. “But perhaps you should let me do it? I’d hate to think that magic could conflict with magic.”

She hesitated a moment, but tossed the bag to him, Crowley catching it easily. “I guess I picked the right person to help me then.”

Crowley snorted, pulling a pinch of powder out from within. “I’ll try not to take offence to that.” He muttered a few words and blew the powder, it shimmering in the air for a moment before gathering and moving outside the building. “Let’s go get ourselves a witch, shall we?”

Luna sighed. “Again. We should stop meeting like this.”

He chuckled, leading the way. “Or you could stop asking, but then I’d really know something was wrong.”

She smiled after him, shaking her head as she followed.

For once, it seemed, fate was on their side, Rowena looking less than impressed as they caught her trying to get out a locked door.

“Well, isn’t this cute?” She asked, looking between the two of them. “I suppose a few words had you eating out of her palm? I’m surprised none of the others she’s come across has joined you.”

“Oh, I’m sure they’d be more than happy to,” Crowley said rather cheerfully. “And since one of them is Lucifer, I’m pretty sure he could settle the score rather well.”

“Is that supposed to scare me?” Rowena scoffed. “If you really thought that, if you weren’t terrified of him yourself, you would’ve already brought him along. Now, what can I do for the two of you?”

“Get rid of the spell,” Luna said before Crowley could say anything else. “Get rid of it and clear everyone that’s been affected.”

Rowena rolled her eyes. “Oh yes? Just like that? Sorry dear, the spell is permanent. You’re just going to have to learn to deal with the consequences.”

There was a dangerous flash in Luna’s eyes, one that reminded Crowley of what she had once been. “Just like that. I’m not here to play games Rowena. I want it gone, and I want it gone now. They’re all going to kill each other soon enough if it’s not.”

“That would be a pity, I’m sure.” Rowena said, and they watched closely as she tried to shift a little. “But I can’t say that none of them wouldn’t deserve it.”

“While I’m sure we can certainly say Lucifer deserves it,” Luna said coldly. “I can guarantee he would come out on top. I don’t really feel like losing all my friends today, or any day for that matter, no matter how much they are currently convinced they love me."

Rowena tutted and looked at Crowley. "Doesn't it just break your heart to hear her say that?”

Crowley raised an eyebrow. "And why should it? I am not effected by your spell, so whatever else is laced in there means little to me."

There was something about Rowena's look that neither of them liked.

A charming smile crossed her lips. "Is that so? Well isn't that interesting. I'm sure then that you'll feel no compulsion at all to jump in to save her when things go wrong then?"

Crowley and Luna frowned at this. "What do you mean go wrong?"

"Well you were correct in your assumption that they will get violent," Rowena said innocently. "And more than one of them will probably die, but then the real kicker of the spell? They'll turn on you. If one of them can't have you, none of them will."

"No," Crowley's voice was quiet. "Remove the spell now mother."

"I have more important things to be doing I'm afraid.” She said sweetly. "So as much as I'd love to stay and chat, I really must be going."

No!" Luna took a step forward, but Rowena was quicker, launching her backwards with a wave of her hand, her body slumping.

Crowley found himself powerless and immobilised as Rowena turned to him.

“Oh, I'm sorry Fergus," She patted his check as she walked over. "But I would tell her before it's too late.”

Rowena left, anger curling in Crowley's blood, even as Luna groaned, sitting up, giving a small shake of her head, before she focused back on the room, seeing what had happened.

"Have I ever mentioned how much I hate witches?" She grumbled as she limped over to him, breaking him free from the spell.

"Many a time, and the feeling is mutual." Crowley growled, glad to be free of that quickly. "Our chances of finding her now are slim."

Luna scowled. "Almost makes me wish...” She shook her head. "Doesn't matter. We better get back before they do anything.”

Crowley pulled out a handkerchief and handed it to her. "Your head is bleeding."

"Oh, thank you.” She dabbed at the wound. "I'm just glad I wasn't unconscious long. That could've been disastrous.”

He nodded, but he was still watching her, something about Rowena's comment getting to him, although he didn't understand exactly why, or more, he didn’t want to understand why.

Luna sighed, the blood not easing. "I'm dreading walking into the bunker like this. It's going to be disastrous, especially when they are all an edge with each other as it is."

Crowley stepped forward and applied a little more pressured to the wound. "Have you ever thought what it would be like to go back?"

She met his gaze with a sad smile. “Many times, but you know as well as I do...”

His expression is grim, his jaw set. He knew, he knew what she was trying to do, but he still had a feeling that it would never work. Spell or no spell, demon was ingrained in her blood, and she was always going to be one now, no matter what the spell did.

Luna could read him still, even after all this time, and she knew he still wasn’t happy about it, no matter what she said to change his mind. If she didn’t stick with what she felt was right though, then she was going to be miserable, and if she could get things back in control...

Luna stared at the pile of ingredients in front of her, going over her mental list again to ensure she definitely had everything. Crowley was watching her, still looking unconvinced, but he remained silent, waited for her to talk to him.

Finally, she let out a slow breath and met his gaze. “Is everything in place?”

Crowley nodded. “Set and ready to go as soon as this is done.”

She hummed absently. “Good, and the Winchester’s don’t suspect anything?”

“Darling, if they did, they would be on to you already.”

She gave a nervous smile. “Relax Crowley, it’ll work out fine.”

He snorted. “I think it’s you who needs to relax. If you really want to go through with this, then do it now, before you have time to convince yourself otherwise.”

“I thought you didn’t want me to change?”

“I don’t,” He admitted. “But this is your choice, not mine, just as all of this has been your choice.”

Luna flinched and began preparing the ingredients. “Not all of it.”

“I meant between us Luna.”

She smiled at him, a sadness in her gaze that he'd never seen before. "Whatever happens, I do want to thank you. You've given me a freedom back that I haven't had in a long time."

Crowley does his best to keep his expression passive. "Don't get to sentimental on me darling, I might just change my mind about helping. You are a damned good demon after all,"

"I wouldn't say that," Luna shook her head slightly. "More just...stuck in the middle I guess."

"Nothing is black and white Luna."

"I know,” Luna said softly. "We both know. Now, let's get this over and done with."

The spell had worked, almost too well. After everything she'd been through, she was basically human again, but Crowley knew, as did Luna, that the spell was hanging on by a thread.

Still, the plan went on. She came across the Winchester's on a ‘hunt’, one carefully organised by Crowley to gain their trust. Luna was good, almost too good, but they eventually let her in.

Crowley didn't like it then, and he liked it even less now. She deserved better than this.

Luna comes out of her bathroom, the two of them safely back in the bunker. Things were quiet, but right now they couldn't sense any harm being done, so Luna focused on cleaning up.

"How's that?" She asked, angling her head for him.

"Very normal," Crowley said. “But you know that's not going to stop the angels from sensing your pain."

"I know, but I can't do much about that." She rolled her eyes at his look. "It's not that simple Crowley. The destruction it could cause alone-"

"Could potentially level the bunker. I have always said the place needs redecorating."

Luna laughed softly, shaking her head. "Come on, let’s go make sure everyone is okay."

Crowley caught her arm as she went to walk past and he hesitated for a moment, a bad feeling sitting in his stomach, but as she met his gaze, surprised, he faltered.

“Just…be careful.” He said quietly. “We don’t know how bad this has gotten. If you were still…you know…I wouldn’t have to…to…”

Luna smiled and patted his hand. “Come on Crowley, we’ll be alright. It’s not like I want to go out there, I’d rather not have others obsessing over me, but right now, we’re the only ones that know what is really happening, meaning we’re the only ones that are going to be able to fix it.”

Crowley let out a slow breath and forced himself to let go of her arm, watching her smile again and head to the door. His bad feeling grew, but he pushed it down. She was right, and he had to trust her as he always did.

The bunker was far too quiet for either of their liking as they went out into the hall, and Crowley watched her fingers itch a little towards her gun. Something wasn’t right.

Whatever had happened while they were away, was nothing good.

Something was burning, and Luna instead pulled out her angel blade, Crowley following suit. Both of them knew that smell, having used holy oil multiple times over the years, and it only set them more on edge wondering what had happened for that to come out.

The first thing they saw were Sam and Dean tied to chairs, both trying to get themselves free, mouths gagged shut. The next was Gabriel, Castiel and Balthazar trapped within a circle of burning holy oil.

Neither of them got a chance to react to what was going on, Crowley suddenly launched away from Luna’s side, leaving just her facing off against Lucifer.

“That was uncalled for,” Luna said, a note of coldness in her voice, glaring at Lucifer. “Crowley has been helping me, and by extension, helping you.”

Lucifer shrugged, unfazed, holding her gaze. “He’s still just a demon, by rights, I should just kill him now and be done with it.”

“Really?” Luna asked, keeping Crowley in the corner of her gaze as he slowly gets up, glaring darkly at Lucifer. “I’m afraid I can’t let you do that. As much as none of you here seem to think otherwise, I do prefer him very much alive.”

He scoffed. “And what hold does he have over you to have that reaction? You are a hunter, by right-”

“I should be killing you too,” Luna said. “As the supposed epitome of evil as you are, but life is just a little more…complicated than that, isn’t it Luci?”

Lucifer’s eyes narrowed on Luna and she could see him pause, an implication in her tone that he didn’t quite understand. A tense air began to fill the room, and all eyes were on Lucifer and Luna.

“Leave Luna alone Lucifer,” Gabriel said, trying to edge himself as close as possible to the circle of flames. “She’s the victim in all this, and needs us to help, not hinder.”

“I’m not the one that’s armed,” Lucifer said, gesturing lazily to the angel blade in her hand. “So clearly she was expecting some sort of fight.”

Luna huffed and threw down the blade, it clattering to the floor. “No, actually, it was a precaution. Did you have something you wanted to say?”

Lucifer looked from her to the blade and back, even as all the others in the room grew more agitated, included Crowley, who was now back on his feet and trying to edge forward a little without gaining Lucifer’s attention.

“You think it’s a spell,” Lucifer said slowly. “Had little Sammy there looking things up. You could’ve easily just asked us to check. If there was, we could’ve gotten rid of it.”

“It is a spell,” Luna said. “And I got Sam to look because he’s been the most sensible about all this, no matter what you all think.”

“But you still didn’t let him near you again.”

“No, I didn’t,” Luna folded her arms. “Because the less contact you all had with me while this spell is on me, the better. Of course, after finding Rowena, I realised that contact or not wasn’t going to make a damn bit of difference, so that’s why we came back to check.”

“And-”

“Crowley is unaffected,” Luna cut him off as his gaze went to move to Crowley, getting his attention back on her. “That’s why he has been able to properly help. Now, I’m only going to ask you this once, Lucifer, please let everyone go, so we can sort this out in a civilised manner.”

Lucifer looked unimpressed, his eyes narrowing on her. “And just how is the dog not affected? He is just like the rest of us. This is assuming I even believe you about the spell.”

“I don’t have answer for that,” Luna said. “It could have been the result of the incompleteness of the spell, or it could just be that it doesn’t work on demons. I’m sure there are other reasons, but you are avoiding my request.”

He stood and approached slowly, perhaps a little cautiously, her previous words still in the back of his mind. “Yes, because none of these idiots deserve you. I’m ensuring that we won’t be interrupted.”

“Crowley, stay there,” Luna said, holding Lucifer’s gaze as Crowley tried to inch further again. “I’m alright. He is not going to do anything to me.”

“Forgive me if I don’t exactly believe you.” Crowley muttered under his breath, but against his better judgement, he didn’t continue forward.

Lucifer stood over her. “And how can you be so sure of that?”

“Well, you can certainly try,” Luna said lightly. “But I assure you, you will be the one regretting it.”

Crowley watched as Lucifer seemed to consider how to take that statement. Luna had never been specific on how well she knew him, but Crowley knew that nothing good had happened between them. She had been furious when Sam and Dean allowed him to stay in the bunker, and if things hadn’t been as bad as they were outside of this, he knew she would've left.

Now he was wishing she had anyway.

Lucifer tilted his head at her. "And just what do you think you can do to me?"

There were multiple shouts at once but Luna was already moving, a second angel blade in her hand as she dodged out of the way of Lucifer’s blow, and swing back in, the blade catching him under the ribs.

It wasn't enough to kill him, but it was enough steal his breath and power for a moment, although the holy oil and ties did not disappear.

The lights in the bunker began flickering, Gabriel building up his power to try and get out. "Leave her alone!"

Luna's gaze doesn't leave Lucifer, even as she slowly picked up her first blade, watching him pull out the first. “I’ve been waiting a long time to do that.”

Lucifer glared at her, his eyes red. "Is that so? Well I'm sad to tell you that it won't have much effect on me except to piss me off.”

"Then you'll get to feel just a fraction of what I've felt." She snarled. "Shall I do it again?”

His eyes flashed with power. "If this is love, then I hate it.”

“You haven't even been close to human, Luci, so you'll never have an understanding of what real love is.” She spun the blade in her hand. “I can arrange it though, if you like. Now that would make me feel better.”

Crowley found himself suddenly frozen, staring at Luna, a lot of things suddenly clicking into place.

Lucifer approached slowly, her blade in his hand. “And what would you do with angel grace when you got it? You’re nothing but a little human, you have no use for such a thing, even if I did let you do such a thing.”

Crowley loved her. That was why the spell didn’t work on him. That was why his worry had been growing for her. He loved her and he hated that he had never realised it.

“I’d keep it away from you for starters.” Luna stood her ground. “Then I’d probably enjoy watching you squirm for as long as possible. You wouldn’t be able to cope with being human Luci, and that would just make me all the more amused knowing that I was the one that got to do it.”

He had loved her for a long time, long before she’d made herself human again, and certainly long before he’d ever experienced human emotions again. Being a demon had just dampened the emotion, hadn’t allowed him to understand it properly. He had always wondered why he was so against her being human again, or why the two of them just seemed to fit into such an easy rhythm with each other. He couldn’t believe that he’d never realised this before.

But then, he thought, he always chased those thoughts away that got even close to this admission.

Lucifer’s expression was a cold snarl. “You enjoy playing with fire too much, especially for a hunter. I think it’s time you were taught a lesson or two.”

Crowley loved her and if he let this go on, he was about to watch her die.

Luna smirked. “And just what makes you think that I’m an ordinary hunter?”

Lucifer took another step and suddenly Crowley was between them. He didn’t have any idea what he was going to do about it, but this had to stop now.

“Crowley, don’t.” Luna’s voice was quiet, just for him, tension sitting far too heavily in the air.

There was something in her voice, something that Crowley had only just realised that he used himself. Luna felt the same for him and it just made him more resolute to not move.

“This needs to stop.” Crowley said, keeping himself calm, holding Lucifer’s gaze. “We need everyone, everyone, for what is coming, and going after Luna is madness, no matter how you think you feel.”

“Crowley, please get out of the way.” Luna took his arm and Crowley’s heart raced, feeling what she felt. “Please.”

“I can’t do that Luna,” Crowley said back, still not moving, wondering whether she had ever seen this in him when she’d still been a demon. “Now, we can get this spell sorted, we just need more time.”

Lucifer’s eyes flashed and in a movement that none of them saw, everything came crashing down.

Crowley was thrown back several feet by Luna, that old feeling of her power rippling across his skin for a moment, and he had just enough time to catch himself and see what had happened.

It didn’t have time to register before Gabriel, Castiel and Balthazar suddenly broke free from the holy oil and rushed at Lucifer, brilliant flashes of light filling the bunker, Sam and Dean knocked backwards in their chairs as the angels fought. Anger and rage crackled through the air, fuelling the chaos, and Sam and Dean struggled to break free to try and join the fray.

Crowley ignored all that, he caught Luna before she could fall, a shuddering gasp leaving her, the angel blade sticking out from her chest. His chest ached, knowing she didn’t have long, but it took him a moment to find his voice.

“What did you do that for love?” Crowley asked, fighting hard to not let his voice break. “That was incredibly foolish.”

Luna does her best to smile through the pain, meeting his gaze. “For you, it would’ve been instant death, for me…well…” She fought to draw in another breath. “I’m sorry Crowley.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for love,” Crowley gripped the blade and as carefully as he could, he pulled it free, blood blossoming quickly on her chest. “I’m the one that should be sorry. There’s a lot of things that I should have done a long time ago.”

She took his hand, and he hated that her grip is so weak. “You were right, you know? I should’ve never have…have…”

Crowley shook his head. “No, I should’ve made you take the risk, that’s what I should’ve done, then we wouldn’t be in this mess. My mother could’ve never used that spell and…and…”

Luna gave a weak chuckle, despite herself. “Then…you would’ve…never…known…”

She knew. Of course she knew. Luna always knew. She knew him better than he knew himself.

He licked his lips, watching her getting weaker by the moment, his heart breaking, and he knew that there was only one thing that he was going to be able to do, consequences be damned anymore, and it honestly couldn’t go more wrong than this.

Crowley refused to lose her.

From his jacket pocket, he pulled a vial, angel grace glittering within, and before Luna can protest, can grab his hand to try and stop him, he pulled the topper off.

Lunvariel was less than impressed when she found herself on Earth, looking around with a slight air of distaste at all the nature surrounding her, before her gaze moved to Chuck, standing a little distance away, watching her.

“What?” She asked. “I’m sure whatever this is, you could’ve talked to me about in Heaven.”

Chuck was looking at her disappointedly. “No, I couldn’t. It would cause all sorts of problems if I did, and after what Lucifer had done, and what I had to do to him, no one needs anymore of that turmoil.”

She raised an eyebrow at him. “And what exactly am I have meant to have done to deserve that accusation? I helped you put Lucifer away.”

“Perhaps,” Chuck said slowly, breaking away from her gaze to look around. “But clearly you have another plan in mind for him. Being in Hell would make it easier to handle.”

“A bigger plan?” She echoed. “Who has been filling you with that nonsense? The only plan I have is to keep doing my duty for you.”

“And what is your duty Lunvariel?”

She was starting to get frustrated. “I look out for Lucifer, Michael, Raphael and Gabriel, as always, as you created me for. I ensure they stay in line, and I put them away when they don’t.”

Chuck met her gaze slowly, and she could see the doubt clearly in his eyes. “You don’t love humanity.”

“I love it enough,” Lunvariel said flatly. “From a distance. Being here is certainly not a preference of mine, but that does not mean I do not care. We all have places that we’re comfortable.”

She was worried, having never seen Chuck like this before, and while she knew Lucifer’s rebellion had taken its toll, she never thought it would have him question her loyalty. He’d brought her here for a reason, and now she was wondering exactly what it was.

“I’m sorry Lunvariel,” Chuck said softly. “I do not wish to do this, but if you cannot be honest with me, I cannot take that risk. You will stay here.”

This took her back. “Stay here? What are you talking about? I have always been honest with you. What is it that I am meant to have-”

Her words are strangled in her throat as pain erupted from her back, sending her crashing to her knees, tears filling her eyes. Her wings burned behind her, burning feathers floating through the air, and she tries to look at him, her chest aching through more than the pain.

Chuck sighed heavily. “I have no pleasure in doing this. I do not want to do this. I have no choice but to do this. I am sorry.”

“Sorry,” She gasped through the pain, her voice breaking. “I have done nothing wrong!”

“I cannot trust you saying that,” He said sadly. “And after all that Lucifer said, I cannot leave you in Heaven. This is the fairest way to deal with it.”

“What?” Lunvariel tried to get back to her feet, but it was still all too much, she had no strength left in her body. “You’re still going to take Lucifer’s word over mine? After all he’s done?”

“I am sorry.” Chuck turned away from her. “If that is worth anything at all.”

Lunvariel watched him disappear, holding herself as tight as she could, tears rolling down her cheeks, anger curling in her stomach. She was alone and she was human.

The reaction to her grace was immediate, her body arching, and through the chaos of the angels fighting and the lights flickering, the bunkers alarms started blaring, the room blinking between red, white and black.

Crowley backed away as best he could, shielding his eyes, as Luna seemed to burn brightly, surrounded by fire and ash and smoke. The crackle of power through the air was unmistakable, and soon the lights disappeared entirely, flickering them all into complete darkness momentarily.

Confusion filled the room quickly, but through squinting eyes, Crowley could see Luna moving, could see her kneeling on the floor, large wings forming behind her, heavily damaged, very little of them left, and black smoke seemed to trail from her hands.

Slowly, she rose, her chest rising and falling in deep breathes, and with a sudden move, throwing out her hands, everything snapped back to normal. Lucifer, Gabriel, Castiel and Balthazar were thrown to opposite corners of the room, Sam, Dean and Crowley all back on their feet. The lights flickered on and the alarms stopped.

There was a moment of complete and utter silence.

“Lunvariel.” Gabriel dared to speak first. “You’re alive?”

Luna’s eyes opened slowly, burning a vivid and bright blue ringed with black.

“Lunvariel’s a myth,” Balthazar squirmed against her hold. “And I would greatly appreciate it if you let me go.”

“No.” She said, all too calmly, her gaze turning to Lucifer, who was watching her, frozen. “Not until I deal with him.”

Lucifer seemed to recover a little at this, his lip curling in a snarl. “You want to deal with me, little Lunvariel? Now that is adorable. You never had any chance of-”

His words were strangled in his throat, and he struggled as she turned her gaze away, looking momentarily at the trails of smoke still curling around her hands. Slowly, she flexes her fingers and it eases away, the black in her eyes slipping back to white, although her eyes were no less blue.

“Chance of what, exactly?” She asked, her voice cool and calm. “Because last I checked, keeping you idiots out of trouble was my job. With Uriel dead and Michael still in the cage, that only leaves me with the two of you to deal with, and seeing as I have no problem with Gabriel…” She looked at him again, a hardness in her gaze. “And seeing as what you did to me, I think I have every right to do as I please.”

“Hang on a second,” Dean said quickly. “I can’t believe I’m actually going to say this, but we need him still, but not only that, what the hell is going on?”

Luna titled her head a little. “I thought that would be obvious? I’m sorry to have lied to you boys for so long, but, well, I’m not exactly human. I have been appearing as such to…well, you don’t really need to know that. Let’s just say I have had a grudge for a very long time. Crowley allowed me to clear one off of my list, a certain witch who cursed me to Hell, but now I finally have the opportunity to do the other.”

“Angels can’t be cursed to Hell,” Sam said, still looking just as confused as Dean. “And they certainly can’t be…be…whatever you are.”

She smirked slowly and her gaze returned to Lucifer. “I guess rules change.”

There was an audible cracking sound as Lucifer was pressed hard into the wall, cracks starting to appear, and despite his struggling, it was doing little against her new found power.

“Get me cursed to Earth, Luci,” Luna tutted. “Surely you can’t have thought I wouldn’t have held onto that?”

Crowley held Sam and Dean back as they went to step forward, shaking his head. He knew, better than anyone here, that there was no stopping Luna when she had her mind set on something. He watched in sheer awe of her, completely out of ideas on what to do next, except to let her do what she had to do.

“Luna, you can’t,” Castiel said, also trapped by her power still. “We need him!”

“Oh, I know,” She said, the calm tone still in her voice. “I’m just teaching a lesson and waiting.”

Lucifer was gritting his teeth against the pain, trembling as he tried to fight back but couldn’t. Cracks were starting to appear along his skin, his grace shining through, and they all thought she was about to rip him apart, none of them having little doubt that she could.

The bunkers lights flickered again and then Chuck was standing there.

“Lunvariel, stop.” He said firmly, eyes alight as she glanced back at him. “I’m here. We can talk.”

The power in the room dissipated and Lucifer dropped with a groan, Gabriel, Castiel and Balthazar stumbling forward as they were let go as well.

“You could’ve stopped this at any time.” Luna said with a lazy shrug. “You let it get this far. In all honesty, I’m actually surprised you stopped.”

Chuck’s jaw clenched. “You wanted to talk, so let’s talk, but not here.”

With that, the two of them disappeared from the room.

“What just happened?” Dean asked.

Castiel grunted, brushing his clothes down, looking a little worse for wear. “She’s gone to speak to God. I guess I should’ve known by now that we shouldn’t have believed him when he told us she was dead.”

Sam and Dean stared at him for a long moment before they register what he said. “Wait, Chuck is God?”

“Why was I in love with Luna?” Gabriel asked, screwing up his nose slightly, rubbing his head. “That’s…what all that had been about right?”

“If you listened, you would all have realised that she’d been hit with a spell.” Crowley said, feeling like a long explanation was coming and not wanting to be a part of it. “Naturally, it broke when she revealed herself.”

“Why were you carrying around her grace?” Castiel asked.

Crowley shrugged and waved his hand at them as he turned away. “None of your business Feathers.”

With that, he vanished from the bunker, leaving them to sort themselves out, but he doesn’t return to Hell. Crowley didn’t care what discussion she was having with Chuck, or who Chuck even was, he needed to see her. He needed to know she was truly alright.

He appeared close enough that he was out of sight, but could still hear the conversation being had. In the middle of nowhere, again, it seemed, although at least this time was in the woods, the two of them overlooking a large valley.

“You took an awful risk doing that,” Chuck said, a little sternly. “Do you even know how much could’ve gone wrong?”

Luna raised an eyebrow at him. “I didn’t take any risk. That was Crowley’s choice to not let me die.”

“You and I both know you could’ve stopped it.” He said. “Even after all this time, you still haven’t learnt anything, have you?”

She laughed, shaking her head. “You talk of me not learning things, and yet, you are still hiding from your sister, still hiding from the responsibilities of Heaven, and still acting as if I was in the wrong all that time ago.”

“You were.”

“I wasn’t.” A harsh note entered her voice. “And you bloody well know it. You just believed Lucifer’s bullshit. Even now, you still hurried to his side.”

“If Lucifer wasn’t wrong, you wouldn’t have fallen in love with a demon.” Chuck said, his voice raising a little. “You would’ve gone for a human, or you would’ve lived out your days in peace.”

“Is that what you wanted me to do?” Luna laughed. “Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realise that I wasn’t supposed to get captured by a witch, have my remaining grace stolen, and then have that witch curse me to Hell. Then what? You really think that I was going to just sit back and let myself be tortured for eternity? You really think that I wasn’t going to take opportunities door as soon as it was knocked on?”

Chuck shook his head. “You’re missing the point.”

“No, you’re missing the point.” She said coldly. “Despite what I was doing for you, you always underestimated me.”

“And now look at you,” He looked her over. “Practically an abomination, certainly not one I created.”

“No, one I created,” Luna said lightly, letting her eyes flash to black for a moment. “Sitting firmly in the middle, where I belong, because you seemed content to put me there in the first place.”

Chuck huffed and took several steps away, frowning and muttering a few curses under his breath, before he looked back at her, a sadness in his gaze. “For what it’s worth, Lunvariel, I am sorry.”

She shrugged. “You tried that already. For what it’s worth, Lunvariel died a long time ago. It’s Luna now, and I hope you don’t forget it.”

He went to say something else, watching her for a moment, but thinks better of it, shaking his head and vanishing.

For a long moment, quiet sat in the air.

“You can come out now Crowley.” Luna said quietly, smiling as he appeared. “I guess it makes things a bit clearer for you now?”

“Not in the slightest,” He said with a small smile and looking her over. “Are you alright love?”

She nodded slowly, seeming to think about, and held out her hand for him. “I will be once you come here.”

Crowley took her hand, the two of them standing there together, watching the quiet of the world, unsure of what was to happen next.

“Thank you,” Luna said finally. “For taking that risk.”

“I was hardly going to have you die on me now, was I?” He asked quietly, giving her hand a squeeze. “After all that, just sending you into the nothingness? I don’t think so.”

She laughed and shook her head. “It’s…still not what I was expecting.”

“No,” He admitted. “But we can sort that out. We seem to be good at doing that together. Sorting things out.”

Luna nodded, casting him a look. “We are. To think I shot you when we first met.”

Crowley chuckled. “I clearly didn’t take it personally.”

Again, an easy silence fell, the two of them looking out over the valley together.

“Crowley?”

“Yes Luna?”

“I love you, I hope you know that, no matter what it really means for two people like us, and no matter what others will think it means.”

Crowley smiled. “I love you too, and I think it means exactly what we want it to mean, others be damned.”

Luna beamed and gave his hand a squeeze. “So if I asked you to still help me hunt your mother down…”

“Oh, now that would be my pleasure love,” Crowley chuckled. “Although, we might actually have to thank her for this one.”

She laughed and nodded. “That we might, although, still being a witch, I don’t think I’ll mean it too much.”

They laughed together and, still hand in hand, disappeared to go and find Rowena.

#supernatural #crowley #crowley x original female character #crowley resurrection bang 2021

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overthinkingkdrama · 5 years ago

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Hi! So, I’ve just recently gotten into K-Dramas, and... I have a small issue, and that is though I LOVE them in the beginning, by the end they always disappoint me? Like, they start lighthearted and fun, and then by the end suddenly everyone��s in mortal peril, and I don’t care? Or they start all fantasy, and then it’s all about the romance in the end? So... Could you possibly recommend me ones that are good, or tone consistent, throughout? Please?

Hi! Thanks for dropping by for recs. These are some of my favorite asks. I just love going back through my watch list and finding dramas that fit a given criteria. It gets more fun the more dramas I've seen.

The thing about Kdramas that makes them a uniquely sticky beast is that many of them are live-shot week to week, at least for part of their run, and often the scripts are not fully written before filming begins. Popular Kdramas will also occasionally receive extensions which can cause further pacing and plot issues and (sometimes) cause a story to sputter out entirely. With the increasing prevalence of entirely preproduced dramas there's been an increase in overall drama quality and consistency in past years. That being said, Kdramas are still a decidedly mixed bag in terms of overall production quality. So it pays to either drop things with extreme prejudice if you stop enjoying them and watch widely, or to have a good drama filter friend (like me!) to give you vetted recs. As a genre a lot of the more "classic" feeling dramas have a tendency to start really light hearted and then swing super dramatic in the latter half. That's something I occasionally like, but lucky for you not all dramas are like that!

Your ask doesn't really tell me what genre of Kdrama most appeals to you, so I went through my list and tried to find you wide a variety of dramas that I think of as being well-paced and tonally consistent throughout. I've also tried to limit myself to dramas that I rated highly on MDL, although my primary criteria was "good and tonally consistent" so this list of dramas is kinda all over the map. But then, so are my tastes. Also, I kinda got the impression from your ask that you're not a fan of the uber-melodramatic side of kdramas and you want something a little more restrained and less soapy, so I tried to steer away from those more makjang dramas but did not entirely succeed, lol. I gave a couple sentences of description so you can more readily narrow down what you're interested in, and if you would like a more thorough review of the dramas some of these have full reviews on my blog which I went ahead linked where they exist.

Age of Youth: A well written slice-of-life ensemble drama about a group of 5 college age women who end up boarding together. There are a couple moments of high drama/trauma toward the end of the show that might be a turn off. But other than the finale the tone is consistent. 9/10

Arang and the Magistrate: A dark fantasy fusion sageuk with a romance. I included this drama because it does a good job of developing the creepy worldbuilding and fantasy throughout. Though at points it can be a bit slow and the special effects are hella cheesy. 8/10

Argon: A tight, journalism driven suspense drama. Not always my genre but I found it very engaging, and at eight episodes it does not overstay its welcome. 8/10

Be Melodramatic: Another female-centric slice-of-life ensemble drama, though with an emphasis on fourth wall breaking comedy and clever dialogue. Very funny and heartfelt. 8.5/10

Cheese in the Trap: Maybe a controversial inclusion, but I very much enjoyed this drama. A slice-of-life college romance with psychological thriller elements. Some critics felt that the drama focused too heavily on the second male lead in the later half of the story, but YMMV. 8.5/10

Coffee Prince: Classic cross-dressing romance and still probably the best of its kind. A wonderfully nuanced and progressive handling of the subject matter, even after 13 years. Deals with serious subjects but doesn't go too melo with it. 8.5/10

Children of Nobody: My best of 2019, a dark psychological thriller about a child psychiatrist and a police detective who have to confront gray morality while attempting to track down a serial killer who only targets unrepentant child abusers. 9.5/10

Ex-Girlfriend Club: On the lighter side, a friends-to-lovers type romantic comedy about the writer of an autobiographical webtoon who has to figure out a way to get along with a group of his ex-girlfriends to make a movie based on his work. Only 12 episodes. 8.5/10

Go Back Couple: Also only 12 episodes (these shorter dramas tend to be better paced I find) a time-slip drama about a divorced couple who get the chance to relive their twenties and end up realizing they still have feelings for each other. This drama is both very funny and it had me bawling on multiple occasions. 9.5/10

Healer: A favorite of a lot of drama fans, this is an action-focused romance about an awkward soft boy with a secret identity as a highly skilled errand boy to criminals and an intrepid tabloid reporter who is his biggest fan. This drama is pretty tropey, but it's fun and the romance is great. 8.5/10

Hello Monster (aka I Remember You): A police procedural with a background love line about a criminal profiler looking for his lost brother and a detective looking for her father's murderer. One of my personal favorites. 10/10

Hit the Top (aka The Best Hit): A time-slip fish-out-of-water comedy about a 90s pop star who winds up in modern day Seoul and ends up befriending his biological son and meets old friends who his disappearance left in the lurch. 9/10

Incomplete Life (aka Misaeng): A realistic office drama that gave me real world work anxiety, focusing on a failed Go player who winds up an intern at a highly competitive shipping company and has to find a way to earn his keep even without the background and college education of his coworkers. Unbelievably well done ensemble drama. 9/10

Just Between Lovers: A romantic melodrama about two people whose lives were irrevocably changed by a tragic mall collapse that nearly killed them as children, meeting again as adults and finding comfort and healing in each other. A rough sit at times, but a wonderful love story with incredible acting. 9/10

Just Dance: High school, slice-of-life, drama about a dance club in a technical high school and a group of working class kids who reluctantly become involved in this club and befriend each other. Only 8 episodes (or 16 thirty minute episodes, depending on how you recon it.) 8.5/10

Life on Mars: Remake of the British show of the same name, this is a surreal time-slip police drama, about a forensics expert who gets shot in the head and wakes up in 1988. Or does he? He could also be dying on an operating table. It's hard to tell. Dark, suspenseful and trippy. 9/10

Matrimonial Chaos: An off-beat comedy about two dysfunctional couples who become inescapably mixed up in each others lives. One that's having a hard time getting divorced and another that's having a hard time getting married, and all the messy weird emotions that go along with that. This is another one of those, makes you laugh/makes you cry throughout dramas I have an affinity for. 9/10

Moment of Eighteen: A heartfelt high school drama about a straightforward but awkward loner who is forced to transfer to a new school, immediately earns the ire of a powerful student and experiences first love. Not my usual thing, but very well written with complex and likeable characters. 8/10

Mother: A cold and socially isolated woman becomes a temporary teacher and upon discovering one of her students is being severely abused and neglected, decides to pose as the child's mother and go on the run with her. Like Children of Nobody, this can be a bit of a rough watch because of the subject matter but it is very well done. 9.5/10

My Mister: A healing, human drama about a structural engineer in his 40s and a debt-ridden young woman in her 20s who end up crossing paths and saving each other from a miserable existence. My current all time favorite drama. Cannot say enough good things about it. Practically perfect in every way. 10/10

One Spring Night: A very restrained and naturalistic slow-burn romance about a woman who is about to get married and suddenly begins to question her relationship and a single father who had given up on love who find themselves irresistibly drawn to one another. 9/10

Prison Playbook: An ensemble slice-of-life drama centered on prisoners and correctional officers in their day to day lives. I find the actual het romances in this drama totally useless, but it's a large and talented cast playing a variety of lovable characters. 8/10

Psychopath Diary: Recent fave. A screwball black comedy about a mild mannered pushover who loses his memory and finds a diary that convinces him he's a psychopathic murderer, which gives him a huge boost of confidence from his new found identity, much to the chagrin of those around him and the actual owner of the diary himself. 8.5/10

Queen In Hyun's Man: A drama about a Joseon scholar who time travels to modern day Seoul and meets an actress who just landed a part playing the queen he served in the past. This one might be on the border line of too dramatic or tonally inconsistent, but it's got one of the most pitch perfect finales in Kdramas and the 45 min episodes keep it a snappy watch that doesn't drag or meander too much. 8/10

Reply 1988: A late 80s nostalgia drama about a group of families who all live off the same alley. Lovely family drama, comedy with a variety of romances. Long ass episodes especially later in the run, but I have rewatched the whole thing and I loved every minute of this show. 9.5/10

Save Me: A dark drama about a young woman who finds herself forced into a dangerous cult by her family, and is desperate to escape, and a group of 4 local young men who try to help her. One of the more unique and well done OCN thrillers. 9/10

School 2013: High school ensemble drama that launched a whole bunch of careers. In general I avoid school dramas (I know there have been three on this list so far, but those are like the only three, lol) but this show got me so invested in all these students and teachers. Also the two male leads are so shippable. 9.5/10

Secret Love Affair: A romantic melodrama about a piano prodigy from an underprivileged background who catches the eye of a married older woman and the two fall into a passionate affair. This drama involves cheating (obviously) but it's beautifully filmed and written and the music is to die for. 9.5/10

Signal: This is a supernatural crime thriller and a perennial favorite in the Kdrama community. An imbittered criminal profiler finds an antique police radio which allows him to speak with a police detective 15 years in the past, and uses this to crack cold cases and try to prevent brutal crimes from ever happening. 9/10

Six Flying Dragons: This one is a bit different from the others on the list, first of all because it's a more traditional historical drama, and secondly because it 50 episodes long. But it is so, so very good. And if you're looking for overall consistency in terms of storytelling and tone this drama has it in spades. 9/10

SKY Castle: A unique melodrama about a group of affluent competitive mothers who will go to any lengths to get they're children into the best medical schools, and a mysterious school coordinator with shady motives who gets brought in as a ringer to give them an edge. This show is kind of hard to sell but very entertaining and watchable. 7.5/10

Stranger (aka Secret Forest): The story of a stalwart prosecutor who, due to a childhood trauma is unable to feel the full spectrum of emotions, works with a bighearted police detective to root out corruption around a series of murders. This one’s rather cerebral and requires your full attention but the leads are amazing and there's a second season coming out this year I'm very much looking forward to! 9/10

The Nokdu Flower: Another sageuk drama about the latter years of the Joseon Dynasty surrounding three people who fall on different sides during the Donghak Peasant rebellion. Incredibly well written and involving historical drama. If you're not sure you're ready to commit to something like Six Flying Dragons, I think this would be another good entry point into the genre. The acting is amazing. 9/10

The Smile Has Left Your Eyes: A romantic melodrama and psychological thriller about a dangerous enigmatic young man on the cusp of becoming either a human being or a monster. He becomes involved in a fraught relationship with the sister of a police detective at the same time her protective older brother begins to focus on him as the prime suspect for a murder. High key moody and tragic if you're into that kind of thing (I am). 9/10

Touch Your Heart: On the complete other end of the drama spectrum, this show is pure unadulterated fluff, which managed to keep me giggling and swooning throughout the run, even though it's typically not my thing. An actress joins a law office as research for a role and falls for the ace attorney she's assisting. 8.5/10

WATCHER: Another OCN thriller about three different people with shady motivations who are connected to the same murder case and become involve in a corruption task force looking into dirty cops. One of those "trust nobody, everyone's a suspect" dramas with lovely complex characters and a fully engaging plot. 8.5/10

Sorry that got so out of hand! This is what happens when you don't give me a little more direction I guess. These are all dramas I quite enjoyed and I believe you will find something in there that will suit your fancy. This is a pretty accurate cross section of my tastes.

Happy watching!

Jona

#asks #answered #kdrama recs #this got stupid long #i got half way through writing my two sentence plugs and was like #omg why did i put so many dramas on this list #lemme just casually throw together a list of 30+ titles that’s what you want right #like wtf #oh well #hope you find something you like anon #i have no idea why i’m this way either

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dragon-fics · 4 years ago

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DOS: (Spyro Reignited Trilogy) Wyrmhole (Bubba X Reader)

Chapter summary: Another boy has asked you to prom, but you got scared and said “no”. You try to clear your head with a walk, and end up falling into a hole.

Note: This was requested on Wattpad. And I’m going to immediately apologise for not knowing the non-binary term for boy/girl. Please let me know by commenting if I got it wrong and what to change it to and I will as soon as possible.

F/T = Favourite Takeaway (food) (pizza, Chinese, Indian, etc.)

“(Y/N), um could we talk?” Rodger asked nervously.

“Sure, what is it, Rodger?” I reply. He was a good-looking guy, why would he talk to the shy guy/girl/person in the back of the class.

“So, um, as you know prom is next week and um...,” he took in a breath. “I was wondering whether you’d like to be my date?” He asked. Rodger was one of the most easy-going, confident guys in my year. It was odd seeing him like this.

“I—“

My nerves got the best of me. “I’m sorry Rodger, but I can’t...” I found my body walking away without meaning to.

His face dropped completely. “Oh... I get it.” I felt awful. I went to apologise, but my older brother Sam honked his car horn. I slowly walked away feeling awful.

*-*-*-*

“C’mere Gizmo!” I called, putting her dog food in her bowl. The German shepherd came bounding around the corner of our home. As I emptied the can of wet dog food. She ate it with the most awful of sloppy noises. I tossed the can into the recycling bin and looked at the woods in front of me.

The scene kept playing in my head. All I could see was Rodger’s face dropping with disappointment. I really felt awful for turning him down. I just don’t like crowds and the thought of being near the boy I liked in the middle of a dancefloor, it made my palms sweaty and my breathing uneven.

I focused on the wavering branches of the trees to calm myself down. I relaxed a little, breathing calmly. The forest was pretty much in our backyard, with only a picket fence and gate between our lawn and the wall of trees.

Gizmo whined and looked up at me. I looked down at the dog. She was wagging her tail and looking at me longingly.

“Time for a walk, Gizzy?” The German shepherd bowed the lower half of her body, her black tail wagging wildly. I went inside, grabbing Gizmo’s harness and lead. When I came back out she was jumping up and down in excitement.

“Sit,” I commanded. She sat, tail still wagging hard. I put on her harness and attached her lead. I looked up at the trees again.

We were so lucky to live in one of the few houses with access to this forest, yet still live so near to our town. Then again, when your parents are a writer and an artist, and they’re both as introverted as you are, it all fits into place.

I looked at Gizmo again, her tail still wagging as she waited patiently.

“All right, come,” I said excitedly. I jogged toward the wood, Gizmo bound beside me. I stopped to open the gate and Gizmo hopped the fence, as she often did.

As I jogged on, I felt the grass beneath me give way to hard, coarse dirt. As soon as I passed the first few trees, I saw seven colourful lines of string, each one led I various directions through the wood, all leading back to the same starting point. My usual route was the yellow route, it was the one we all usually walked on with Gizmo. But I saw a new colour, a red string with a white string coiling around it—it looked like a string-made candy cane.

The white string meant that we had not completed the route. I let curiosity take over and followed the red-white trail, Gizmo trotting by my side.

We walked for about twenty minutes before the string ended. I saw to the right that there was a sizeable hole. The surrounding ground was cracked and weak. I walked over, Gizmo followed closely behind, ears twitching in all directions, nervously.

The hole was about a meter wide and looked to be a meter deep. I saw something gold twinkle in the dirt, the last rays of sun catching it.

Again, curiosity got the better of me and I lay down Gizmo’s lead. She whined as I sat with my feet dangling into the hole.

“Its all right, Giz, I’ll be right back.” I lowered myself into the hole and got on my hunches as I dug around the gold spot and could finally pull out the gold coin.

I had never seen a coin like this—I’ve only ever seen gold and silver Euro coins, I rarely see cents used nowadays. I held it in my hand, pinching it between thumb and finger, studying it.

“Looks old,” I mused.

The next thing I felt was the ground give way.

*-*-*-*

I opened my eyes to the bright sun hovering above me. And according to it, it was midday. I groaned as the bright light burned my eyes.

“Finally, you’re awake,” said a gruff voice from beside me. I looked toward the voice. An anthropomorphic blue dragon with a blue-grey underbelly lay beside me. He was very muscular and very handsome. He rolled himself into a pushup position, did three pushups and pushed himself onto his feet from the pushup position.

“Impressive,” I thought aloud.

The dragon smirked. “Not really.” He held out his muscular hand. I reached for it and with one swift movement, he pulled me into his arms.

My cheeks flushed red. Keep it together, (Y/N).

The dragon got on one knee and placed me on the ground. “The name’s Bubba, and welcome to Artisans in the Dragon Realm,” he stood up and spread his arms wide to gesture at the lush, grassy area.

I looked around, noticing several dragons that were as tall as Bubba. Some were muscular like him, some of them were stick-thin, some were young, some were old with long beards. I saw sheep leap around in the lush grass—surely they were wary of the surrounding dragons.

“I’m (Y/N),” I said. “And why were you lying on the ground beside me?”

“You were unconscious for a while, so I thought it would look less worrying if it looked like we were both chilling on the grass,” as he spoke he flexed his arms, showing off his biceps.

I shook my head and smiled. “That’s reassuring, wouldn’t want anyone to be worried about me being unconscious in a realm I’ve never been before,” I said, a light air of sarcasm stuck to my words.

Bubba chuckled. “Well, I couldn’t leave a pretty boy/girl/person alone in the middle of Artisans unconscious, just in case other dragon tried to flirt with you,” he eyed a green dragon with a yellow underbelly while he worked in his workshop, chiselling a slab of wood.

My cheeks flushed again. God/Gods, he likes me! I thought in a surprised tone. Two guys in one day—that was odd.

I smiled at him as my cheeks returned to their normal shade. “So, um, could I get a tour from the very muscular, very handsome, Bubba?” I asked, trying to return his compliment.

He bowed at me. “As you wish, the dazzling (Y/N),” he held out his arm in an incomplete link. I completed the link and walked with him.

I met almost all the dragons in Artisans, from the small purple dragon named Spyro, to the tall green dragon carpenter named Nestor. Each time I met a new dragon, and they showed me a trick like Zantor’s floating card trick, Bubba would eye them jealously and sometimes—like when I talked to Nestor—a low growl would escape his pursed lips. And then he’d quickly lead me in another direction, to meet someone else or to show me something different.

Hours later, after a complete tour of Artisans, Bubba brought me to a cliff that overlooked the whole of Artisans. I saw the sun set in the distance, the evening sky adding a warm orange glow to Artisans.

“(Y/N)?” Bubba said, sitting on the smooth rock beneath us.

“Yeah?” I sat beside him.

Bubba took a breath, which was odd because he was all confident and charming. “I really like you,” he said, in a low voice.

I smiled and wrapped my arm around his thick muscular one. “I like you too, Bubba.”

What the hell am I saying?! I would never admit that!

Would I?

Bubba smiled a toothy grin, one I had to smile at.

“Then perhaps you should tell Rodger how you truly feel,” he said, placing a finger on my heart. “After all, you’ve just told me the same thing.”

I thought for a moment.

“Tell him, (Y/N).”

*-*-*-*

Something wet, slobbery and warm ran across my cheek, and all I could smell was canned dog food. I felt a dull throbbing ache around the back of my head. I groaned loudly, and I heard a lively bark after whatever ran its way across my cheek stopped.

My eyes shot open.

“Gizmo!” I gasped and tried to sit up.

“Easy, easy,” came my dad’s voice. He placed his hand on my shoulder and gently pushed me back down. “You hit your head pretty hard. Your mum bandaged it up after Gizmo came to us for help,” he looked back at the dog.

“Thanks, Gizzy. Thanks, Mum,” I said, relaxing a little.

“You can thank Swords and Wielders for pushing me to learn bandaging techniques,” my mum said, referring to her medieval fantasy story of a knight who taught a wannabe-knight how to fence and be a knight and ended up falling in love.

I smiled, amused.

“We still have to take you to A and E, though,” my dad said. My mum nodded in agreement.

“Fine,” I sighed dramatically. Mum and Dad helped me up and walked me home.

I have to take my mind’s advice and talk to Rodger. I decided, walking with my parents and Gizmo towards our house. I have to tell him I feel the same, and that I’m too awkward to bring a dance.

Perhaps he’d be ok with just staying in and having (F/T) instead?

#spyro reignited trilogy #Spyro the Dragon #spyro fanfiction #bubba x reader #dragon #dragon one-shots #dragon one-shot #request

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camilliar · 4 years ago

Note

I've just reread ~get the wine pairings~ which is one of the best zimbits fics I've ever read and I was wondering if you're currently working/planning any new omgcp fics? I really love your writing 🙈

Ahhhhhhh wow thank you, there are so many Zimbits fics to choose from, and you chose the one I wrote while my OMGCP AO3 account was still a sock I never planned to link to because it was too many kinks pasted together. I’m very flattered. I’m still weirdly pleased with that fic!

To answer you question -- which I’m also very flattered anyone would ask? -- I've got two OMGCP fics that’ll be going up in the next, like, month:

You may have seen me insanely blogging about this AU where everyone’s getting MFAs at Samwell. In theory, ideally, I guess this would be like a loose collaborative series me and @tomatowrites both write in? (If she wants to/has time to?) I’ve very near done with the first fic in this series, like, one to five paragraphs away from being done and passing it on to a beta. It’s a PBJ sex fic set over Labor Day weekend; Bitty thinks he’s getting into one thing (group sex) but he’s actually getting into something else. It doesn’t get that much into the MFA part of things but I hope it does an okay job introducing the general themes around the Parse + Bitty stories in the AU? Lots of ???? because I’m just so excited about this entire thing. Please send me + Tomato asks about MFA stuff, I’m obsessed with and I want everyone else to be, also.

I’m also doing @omgcpheartbreakfest, and that fic is due on August 5 and should be posting ... a week later? Ish? Because it’s a blind fest I ought not divulge too much about it, but it’s an idea I’ve wanted to write out for a while, so I’m looking forward to finishing this over the next week or two.

and then OH GOD this list continues:

After those two I’ll probably switch gears to finish up this infamous South Park fic. Further afield, I did start an Ollie/Wicks fic that could be conceptually interesting but a) what is the audience? and b) do I really want to expend energy on digging into the tone and keeping the tone on point? More problematic is that these characters do not have personalities or even biographical information to transform into a story, so it’s tough to know what their relationship would even be like? I guess what I’m saying is I’m not sure if I want to follow through on this. Earlier today, actually, I took a look at it convinced I was going to scrap it -- but I also felt like there was something there that made me almost wistful for whatever conviction I had for this story when I started it. We’ll see where that goes.

Two big fics I have wanted to write in this fandom for a long, long time, like nearly as long as I’ve been in the fandom:

An AU where Jack’s OD is fatal, and a few years into the future his mother has established a foundation in his memory, to which she’s recruited Parse to sit on the board, which requires that he help fund the foundation. The foundation creates a scholarship for a hockey player at Samwell, and Parse is asked to advise the selection process, which results in Bitty being offered the inaugural award. The problem, however, is that Bitty is terrified of checking and if he doesn’t make it on this team, there’s a chance SMH might ultimately reject the gift -- and if this pilot program fails, Jack’s mom is gonna, like, have a breakdown. So Parse decides to intervene to make sure Bitty doesn’t get cut? Long story short, endgame Bitty/Parse, with the basic tension coming from what everyone’s lost if Jack isn’t in their lives: the team dynamic is totally different! Bitty thinks Jack is a selfish monster who ruined the lives of everyone around him, but Parse maintains that Bitty didn’t know him. The Bob/Alicia relationship is almost irreparably frayed and Parse finds himself in the middle of it because they both refuse to let him go! In a lot of ways it’s a story about Jack, although Jack is very dead for all of it. If done properly I would love to get into some of the tough politics around, like, money in US higher ed and some politics around wealth generally.

I have mentioned a few times that I want to write a “normal” not-edgelord Zimbits fic, and that would be an AU where Jack gets a PhD in history instead of going into the NHL -- so it’s basically canon-divergent from the start of Y2, where Jack decides that, for his own mental health, he can’t do professional hockey. The fic is set over the summer of 2017, at which point Jack is preparing to take his exams, write a dissertation prospectus, and start teaching in the fall. He’s at an impasse with his advisor, however, who doesn’t want him to write a social history of hockey because that’s a second book project, not a dissertation. While that’s happening, Bitty’s just graduated college and moved back in with his parents while Jack tries to find them an apartment in Boston -- which he’s having some trouble doing since Bitty doesn’t have a job lined up and Jack’s income is like, a graduate stipend. The conflicts in this story come from circumstances external to the Jack/Bitty relationship, and center around Jack’s doubts about his ability and desire to follow through on his stated goals, especially considering he’s deeply uncompromising. I’ve seen so many arguments that Jack would be so great at grad school or being a professional academic and it’s like, yes, in some ways, he would be; I can see him doing good archival research, or moving through the degree requirements in a PhD program, because he’s goal-oriented and willing to put the work in. But! He’s fucking awkward and so much of this field is just ... networking? Collaborating? Taking advice? Listening? Taking social cues? He had this idea about what kind of dissertation he was going to do, and why is he being told no? Can Jack take “no”? Can he adapt? A random woman has been showing up to his beer league games -- maybe this degree wasn’t the right path after all?

Then, all the way down at the bottom here, it’s like, I have sooo many incomplete Greerverse and lady Jack fics, many of them in the 500-3k range, but some of them in the 15k range, which is like, wow, that’s a lot of unfinished fic! The most profitable of these would be Jack and Bitty taking a 15-year anniversary vacation traveling around Europe for six weeks, which Jack unceremoniously kicks off by announcing a desire to transition--and then saying nothing about it for the duration of the trip while Bitty tries to work out how he feels about this, never mind what Jack even wants.

Aaaand last and probably also least, I’ve got like 15k each of an a/b/o fic I tried to write for Tomato and another 15k of a fic where a career- ending injury leads Jack to reassess his entire relationship with his body and therefore he winds up getting a little drag-curious, and it was fun writing about like, Jack moping around the house on crutches feeling sorry for himself, but also the fic has an OC who’s a big part of the story and I just didn’t feel that guy or care to write about him so I quit! Maybe I should scrap those things, along with the rest of this mpreg fic.

So that’s where I’m at ficwise right now! Who knows a) when the things further down this list would see the light of days, and b) which other crazy ideas will crop up that I have to write in the interim?

Thank you so much for asking! I love chatting about my fic, please ask any time.

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rxreid · 5 years ago

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Cheater 《 Part. 2

This gif has absolutely nothing to do with the fic I just wanted to use it.

[A/N] ~ So, people actually enjoyed part 1?? And @asonofpeter requested part two so here yah go :) also, I am a tumblr noob so I don't know how to link part one... its under #tom holland on my blog though :)

Warnings ~ Swearing

It had been three months since you and Tom had last exchanged words. Three long months since you walked right out of his life. People asked you how you were doing, to which you always gave the response of 'I'm fine' or 'I've moved on,' both blatant lies. You never truly realised how much your life revolved around Tom. Even when he was gone, he was there to comfort you after a particularly rough day or order pizza when you were sick. He tackled all of your problems with you as if they were his own. But now? Now you had to face the world alone.

Your best friend let you move in with her after the break up, she provided you with company but nothing compared to Tom. You knew you shouldn't still have feelings for him, he'd ripped out your heart and stomped on it. But you did. Every waking hour of your day was spent thinking about Tom, and when it wasn’t, it was because you had finally been able to sleep after hours of crying.

Tom was doing worse than ever before. He'd cancled his trip back to America to allow himself to wallow in self pity. How on Earth could he let himself do that to the most important being in his life? The thing that completed his heart? You were his final puzzle piece and you were gone.

He, too, got the questions asking how he was and he answered with the same responses as you. Harrison knew everything he said was a lie. Tom had asked him to stay in the spare bedroom at your apartment until he felt like putting himself out there again. Harrison was company, but not company like you.

~~~~

Monday morning rolled around quicker than you expected. You groaned as your alarm rang through your ears, seeming louder than it was. You had the morning off work so you'd decided to be productive and go outside for coffee instead of being cooped up in the apartment. Getting out of bed, you showered before throwing on an old sweater and a pair of leggings. After getting ready, you finally made your way out of the apartment and headed for the nearest cafe. Slipping in your earphones, you blasted the playlist you and Tom had made together.

The cafe was in sight and you lowered your head to attend to a notification on your phone. Out of nowhere, a body bumbed into yours, knocking you both to the ground along with the strangers coffee. You whipped out your earphones.

"Fuck, I-I'm so sorry, I wasn't looking where I was going. I'll buy you-" you started, but the stranger cut you off.

"Y/N?" He whispered. Your eyes locked with his and the realisation hit you.

"Tom...hey." you mumbled. He stood up, reaching his hand out for you to take. You didn't, though. You ignored it. Tom couldn't deny the slight tug at his heart. He cleared his throat, not knowing how to drift the conversation from its awkward stage.

"How have you been?" Great job at trying to keep away from awkward. Now you were going to ask him the same question and he couldn't lie. Not to you.

"I'm, uh, I'm doing good, thanks." Lies. "What about you?" You questioned, genuenly intrigued for his answer.

"Terrible. Y/N, I messed up, I fucking messed up. I miss you. You complete me, I'm a wreck without you." Tom rambled, your eyes widened in shock as his glossed over.

"Tom...not here. I'm staying at my best friends apartment, its a five minute walk. If you want to walk there we can continue this...." you trailed off. He nodded his head repeatedly as you motioned for him to follow you.

When you finally arrived at the apartment, you took Tom to the guest bedroom you'd made home. You sat down at the end of the bed and the brown eyed boy stood awkwardly in the doorway.

"You can sit down." You smiled sweetly at him. God he missed that smile.

"You're wearing my sweater." He whispered. You shook your head, you were sure it was your own. He lightly folded the end, revealing the tag that had his initials written in a black.

"Oh. I-I didn't realise." Tom chuckled at your response.

"Me too." You mumbled. Tom gave you a questioning look, promting you to continue. "I miss you too. A lot."

Tom let out an audible sigh, "oh thank god."

"But you still hurt me, Tom. You really hurt me. I-I never thought you'd hurt me..." you let a tear slip from your eye.

"I never meant to hurt you. Please, Y/N, it's been three months and I've never felt so incomplete. Come home." He pleaded, brown eyes looking lovingly into yours. You didn't want to give in so easily but you could tell he wasn't lying. He meant it.

"Okay." You whispered, Tom let out a small chuckle before embracing you in his arms. Those damn arms. The only things you'd wanted that night.

"Can we not go too fast? I'll come home but could we...wait on the ring?" Tom hooked his finger under your chin so you were facing him as he pressed a light kiss to your lips.

"Of course, theres no rush. I'm just happy to have you back in my arms. I'm sorry I hurt you, Y/N. I'm so in love with you." You felt one of his tears hit your cheek and you smiled.

"I'm so in love with you, too."

#tom holland #tom holland angst #tom holland x reader #tom holland fluff #tom holland smut

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loftec · 5 years ago

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It’s been four years today since I put up the first chapter of NTW. Let’s celebrate with a new chapter, and a couple of sneaky extras.

I have been editing old NTW chapters (which has been slow, painful, discouraging work) and it felt impossible to write new chapters before I had finished the edit. I am not finished, but I reached the roguish chapter 20 last week and managed to talk myself into a bit of a compromise. So,

here is chapter 43, effing finally

and a lengthy account of this editing malarky under the cut:

This is a strange one, and I’m not sure what you’re going to think about it. Will this upset you? Have I ruined something you liked? I don’t know. I just know that it’s been four years (FOUR YEARS) and I really just needed to do this. So I’m going to go through the whole process with you here, to catch you up on why and what, and where.

(If you’re not interested in these changes, or in reading my rambling explanation, please have this PDF of NTW chapters 1-42, unedited.)

So.

Why!

I have been writing this story for a long time, and I was in a very different place when I started it. I’m hopefully better at writing, now, and I have a slightly different approach to how I write. Every time someone commented that they just started reading NTW, I would feel really awkward about it, because I knew there were specific weak points in the first half that I wish I had managed better when I wrote them. So I decided to go back and edit a little, no big deal, right? Well.

I ended up doing a little bit more than just correcting typos, and I realise that this might feel like a bad thing to some of you who care about this story, and have been reading it almost as long as I have been writing it.

What??

Not everything has changed, I promise. The story is still the same, and I have tried my best to keep the bottom line the same for each and every scene that have in some way been adjusted. The edits can be divided into three levels, in order of severity.

Level one: tone consistency

Little things you hopefully won’t notice. Trying to get the first half to stylistically better match the second half. I can’t promise it’s better, but it’s different and oh dang… I hope it’s better.

Level two: alternative routes

More noticeable changes which still remain faithful to what they used to be.

Example! In chapter 7, Ian and Mickey talk about coffee. Ian makes a pointless reference to Clueless, because 2015 me thought it would be funny. 2019 me would still make that pointless reference to Clueless, cling to it for a minute, and then admit to myself that it isn’t particularly funny and definitely isn’t in character, and then rewrite the scene. So I rewrote the scene. They still talk about coffee, all the main points are still there, but this time it makes some god damned sense.

Level three: DEMOLITION SCHEDULED TO MAKE WAY FOR AN INTERGALACTIC EXPRESSWAY

Substantial changes and additions.

Example! In chapter 16, I originally wasted some 1000 words ranting about Halloween before getting to the point. Why? Because 2015 me had thoughts about Halloween and figured what the heck, Mickey can have those thoughts too, that makes sense. Guess what, 2015 me? It didn’t! But the point of that section was never supposed to be “Mickey hates Halloween, here’s why”, but “Mickey is grumpy because his son chose to spend Halloween with his mom for the first time in ten years and it sucks”... which did not come across super clearly, all muddled up in me projecting my own thoughts on the poor guy. This has been rewritten to better reflect what I wanted to say with that section, and also include more Yev and better introduce Mickey’s friendship with Sonya. It’s more in character, it’s more fun to read (I hope) and it makes some god damned sense.

We also have a couple of pure additions, such as the second half of the infamously incomplete chapter 20, and little bits here and there.

WHERE?

Here’s a list for reference.

Chapter 1: edited (level 1)

Chapter 2: edited (level 1)

Chapter 3: edited (level 3), slight addition/change

Chapter 4: edited (level 3), slight addition/change

Chapter 5: edited (level 1)

Chapter 6: edited (level 2), slight alteration in dialogue

Chapter 7: edited (level 2), slight alteration in dialogue

Chapter 8: edited (level 3), pretty hefty edit, but no real addition

Chapter 9: edited (level 3), added dialogue in the beginning, minor changes throughout

Chapter 10: edited (level 2), slight alteration in dialogue

Chapter 11: edited (level 1)

Chapter 12: edited (level 2), slight alteration in dialogue

Chapter 13: edited (level 1)

Chapter 14: edited (level 1)

Chapter 15: edited (level 2), mostly just a level 1 edit, but I think I added a paragraph at the end that wasn’t there before

Chapter 16: edited (level 3), the start has been rewritten, large bit has been added, the rest has been heavily edited/rewritten

Chapter 17: edited (level 3), a few smaller additions throughout, pretty heavily edited

Chapter 18: edited (level 2), some heavier edits, mostly bits and bobs

Chapter 19: edited (level 2), pretty heavily edited, but no major changes. Except one, concerning Monica’s death (mentioned). Let me know if you want me to elaborate on why I made this change (or any change, of course).

Chapter 20: edited (level 3) FINALLY ADDED THE SECOND HALF. It’s nothing special, but IT’S THERE NOW OMG I’VE BEEN SO ANNOYED BY THIS FOR SO LONG. Also edited.

(Chapters 21-40 to come.)

And here’s the thing. I think the story is a lot better now, but I 100% understand if you don’t feel the same way. I needed to rewrite the version of it which is published online under my pen name, so I changed it. But! That doesn’t mean you have to read it. Here’s the link to that PDF again. Let me know if the link ever stops working, and I’ll fix it.

Lastly. I want to thank you (YOU) for letting me grow and get better, in my own time. Editing the first twenty chapters was a painful experience for me, they were incredibly uneven and occasionally mortifying. But I thought they were fantastic when I wrote them, and first put them up on AO3, and not one person told me a single discouraging thing about my poor grammar, sloppy spelling, or contrived references. And that means something.

I deal with a lot of “constructive feedback” in my actual work, and I know the value of it. But there is also something so uniquely wonderful about allowing someone to grow at their own pace, purely by encouraging them to keep going and do what they love, exactly the way they want to do it.

I would hope I am a more refined writer now than I was four years ago, but I wouldn’t be writing at all if I hadn’t dared to start somewhere and received the encouragement I needed to continue. So download the pdf and enjoy my humble beginnings, or come with me and enjoy a whole host of new typos in the freshly edited NTW universe. But whatever you do, please know that I remember and appreciate every click, kudos, and kind word you’ve ever said to me on the way. Thank you.

(If you have any questions about any of this, general or specific, please ask me!)

#shameless us #ian x mickey #fan fic #update!#NTW

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heyyyharry · 6 years ago

Text

My Girl Series: Chapter 5 - Somebody Else

…in which, once upon a time, there was a girl and a boy, and no one else.

Series description: Y/N falls in love with the older boy next door who doesn’t feel the same, years later they meet again at a funeral.

AU: actor!harry, older!harry, younger!y/n; (4-year age gap)

Chapter 4: Thumper The Rabbit - Harry tries to mend the past, but Y/N wants to let it go.

wattpad link

‘Somebody Else’ bathroom version, you’re welcome

"Once upon a time, there was a boy and a girl, and no one else..."

Those hot summer days had turned the little town called Holmes Chapel into a heated up oven. Everyone would rather stay indoors where there were fans and air-conditioners, yet the two kids Harry and Y/N refused to abandon their treehouse even for a day.

It was a blazing Wednesday afternoon. In the crooked treehouse, the little girl's voice was a lullaby, with the help of soft summer breezes through the branches, sending the 14-year-old into dreamland. With his eyelids fluttering, Harry heard her say, "don't fall asleep."

"I'm not." He tried to open his eyes and look at her.

"Liar." She scoffed. "Is my story boring to you?"

The little girl closed the pink notebook, looking a bit offended as she crossed her arms.

"No," Harry told her as he folded his arms behind his head. "But I want to hear the good stuff, like sword fights or gun battles or something."

"It's only chapter one. I haven't introduced all characters yet."

The boy thought for two seconds before he asked, "I thought there were just the two of them and no one else?"

"Well, it's just a way of saying. They are best friends, so in their eyes they are the only two people in the world." She furrowed her eyebrows and shook her head at him in disappointment.

"Is the girl you?"

She nodded.

"Is the boy me?"

"No, it's a very handsome guy."

"Fine." Harry huffed as he turned his eyes back to the ceiling and told her to carry on. He couldn't see that smile on her face when she resumed reading the story she'd worked so hard on. Even if she'd lied and said it wasn't true, the boy was Harry of course.

Y/N quickly closed the pink notebook on her lap when her phone started to ring. The call was from her best friend Celine, the one Y/N had been expecting to hear from in almost two weeks. Both Celine and Amala had been so busy with their part-time jobs and final exams so Y/N couldn't describe how elated she was to finally receive that phone call.

"Cece, I miss you! How's Boston?"

"Boring as usual. I'm at work right now but I missed you so much. How are you, baby?"

Y/N scanned her eyes around her messy bedroom, at all the papers and clothes lying everywhere on the chair, table, and floor. She was kind of hopeless if she was honest.

"I'm struggling with my work in process. I'm rereading my old stories to find inspiration." She looked at the time and realized she'd been sitting in front of her laptop for an hour now without actually writing anything. Sighing, she went on, "I miss my imagination back then. I used to be so creative."

"Adulthood kills creativity."

"True." She agreed, rolling her eyes. "How's Amala?"

"She's doing great. Maybe we'll video call you tomorrow night. We both missed you lots and lots!" The next thing Celine said was what Y/N had been expecting."Hey, how's it going with the hot photographer?"

"You know." The girl clicked her tongue. "We're just...flirting back and forth."

"Good! Take things slow, but please let yourself have some fun like a normal 20-year-old."

Celine’s advice put a smile on her best friend's face as the girl nodded her head, and soon remembered they were talking on the phone and she couldn't be seen.

"Got it," she said, biting her bottom lip.

"When are you seeing him again?"

"Tonight. He invited me to his exhibition."

"I thought you said he was taking photos for fun."

"That's what I thought! But it turned out he was actually famous, like he shoots for magazine covers and shit. That's so intimidating."

"That's hot! If I weren't gay and taken and your friend, I would eat him up already."

Both girls guffawed at Celine’s remark.

"Shit, I've got to go now! Any more update?"

The first thing that came to Y/N's mind when she heard the word 'update' was actually Harry. She hadn't told her two best friends about them being friends again yet, because those girls had known too much about her history with Harry.

Though a lot had changed in the last two years, she didn't think they wouldn't just believe her friendship with Harry had improved so much just from hearing the words from her mouth. So she decided to keep him as a secret and wait until she saw them in person to break the news. It'd be more convincing if they could see for themselves how much Harry had changed.

"Nope," Y/N lied. "I think I've told you everything, Isaac, my father's engagement..."

As the silence sank in, she heard her best friend exhale. Celine had basically grown up with her and known her father for almost eleven years now, so that news had also shocked the girl a lot. She didn't know the man well to despise him, yet the pain he'd caused to Y/N made it impossible for her to even respect him like she used to.

"I'll call you tomorrow okay?" Celine said, sounding cheerful again all of a sudden, probably to distract her friend from thinking about her father. "Have fun tonight! I'll be refreshing your insta feed!"

"Oh, God!" Y/N tossed her head back, laughing hard. "Bye! Love you!"

"Love you, too!" And just like that, Celine ended the call.

"So I just ran into Daniel Bullard from Vogue Italy. He was obsessed with your works and he told me—"

As his manager kept on rambling about another magazine cover deal, Isaac failed to focus on what this man thought was important. He couldn't stop the words from going into one ear and out from another while scanning his eyes around the crowded room.

He knew this had been his biggest photography exhibition by far, and he was supposed to be excited that there were many big names here tonight. However, he felt so incomplete that the one person he hoped to see most wasn't there.

Harry wasn't there.

He'd told Harry about this exhibition before anyone else, and Harry had never missed a single special event in his life ever since they became friends. So if Harry decided not to show up, Isaac knew it wasn't because he'd forgotten, it was because of Y/N.

"Isey!" The nickname got the photographer to turn his head, and spotted the cheerful Irish man waving at him from across the room.

"Hey, Lee," he interrupted his manager, who was still talking. "I'm gonna go say hi to Niall, if that's alright."

The Asian man sighed as he realized Isaac hadn't heard a single word he'd said. So he just gave up and told his client to do whatever he wanted. "Meanwhile, I'll be over there, praising you to Daniel Bullard."

"Thanks, Lee." Isaac patted the man on the shoulder and headed towards his friend.

They pulled each other into a tight hug because it'd been nearly four months since the last time they saw one another in person.

"You bastard, why didn't you tell me you were back in London?" Isaac asked, one hand on the other guy's shoulder, smiling widely.

"I wanted to surprise you. This exhibition is amazing by the way! You should shoot my next album cover!"

Niall's suggestion made the blond chuckle. "Only if I got half the profit of every single album you sell."

"Hey, I'm your friend!"

"You made Harry and I buy tickets to your concert, you dick," Isaac exclaimed, hands on his hips as both of them cracked up at the good memories with all three of them together.

Harry, Niall and Isaac had been close friends since they shared a dorm room back in university. Now at twenty-four, they had all become famous and got the lives they'd always wanted, living their dreams. The only thing that hadn't changed was their friendship, so Isaac hoped it would just remain this way.

"Speaking of Harold, where's he?" Niall looked around, squinting his blue eyes to search for that familiar curly head. "Where's the other musketeer?"

Isaac shrugged, not knowing what to say but the truth, "maybe he won't even come."

"Why? Did something happen between you two while I was gone?"

"No."

"Fucking liar. I'll ask Harry then." Niall raised an eyebrow, staring at Isaac and waiting for him to say something, but the guy simply gave him a shrug, lips pressed into a faint smile as he let the awkward silence continue. Niall couldn't take it anymore. He lowered his volume to make sure only his friend could hear what he was about to say.

"Don't tell me he's still upset about the Ruby thing."

"Actually, he handled it better than I thought," said Isaac. "But dude, I almost flew to L.A to punch you for sending us that article about Ruby's engagement. He blocked her on social media for a fucking reason."

"Sorry, sorry, I was just really shocked!" Niall held up his hands like a criminal surrendering to a cop. "I just wanted him to know she's a terrible person."

"I think he knows, but whether he believes it or not depends on himself, not you and I." Isaac shook his head.

Niall opened his mouth to say something else, yet got cut off immediately by his friend's notification. Isaac excused himself and took out his phone to read the text, which instantly got him beaming.

⌲ Smiley: I'm outside. Should I just walk in?

He quickly typed back:

⌲ Yes, just tell them your name. You'll see me as soon as you enter. :)

"Niall," said the blond, beaming as he sent that text. "I cannot wait to introduce you to someone."

"Ooh, lemme guess, it's..." Niall paused a bit to think and then shouted out, "Harold!"

Isaac was very confused, at first he thought his friend was joking, but then he heard that all-too-familiar voice from right behind him saying hello. He turned around, and there he found Harry, dressed in a nice suit with his hair pushed back, making his way to them.

The green-eyed man put on a grin as he gave Niall a hug, then Isaac too. He apologized for being late and congratulated his best friend on this exhibition, like their argument the other night about Y/N had never happened. Isaac didn't know how long it would last, but at the moment he couldn't be any happier.

"I'm glad you're here, H," said the blond, who now started to look more like the host of his own event with that elation on his face. Now that the three of them were together again, they could—

"Hey, guys!"

That female voice caused both Isaac and Harry to turn to the main entrance. Two big smiles appeared on both handsome faces as they called out, at the same time,

"Bambi!" / "Smiley!"

Harry looked at Isaac, who looked at Harry, and the men heard Niall mumble "awkward..." under his breath but he wasn't wrong. It was truly awkward for both of them, and maybe for Y/N too.

"Smiley?" Harry furrowed his eyebrows, mouth agape, staring at the girl who shrugged and flashed him a smile. He was hoping the nickname his friend had just shouted out wasn't meant for his Bambi, but as she hugged Isaac and couldn't stop smiling at him, Harry knew it couldn't be anyone else.

Pulling away from Isaac, Y/N turned to Harry and hugged him as well. He didn't know if she noticed, but he held her a bit tighter than he normally would, and when they broke apart, he told her she looked beautiful in the dark blue dress she was wearing.

"Thanks. This thing is two years old already." She looked down and giggled, and for a short second there Harry almost forgot Niall and Isaac were with them.

"Niall, this is Y/N. Y/N, this is—"

"Niall Horan!" Y/N interrupted Isaac, shaking Niall's hand enthusiastically. "I love your music!"

"I like her already." Niall chuckled, eyes on his two best friends. "Which one of you assholes is her boyfriend?"

Both men were left dumbfounded by that one question, but the person who answered it wasn't one of them.

"Neither. We're just friends," Y/N said, red lips curved into a smile, and the satisfaction on Harry's face could not be more obvious.

"So every random person has a nickname for you then?" Niall raised an eyebrow though his attempt to lighten up the mood had his two friends sighing in frustration. "Maybe I should give you a nickname as well."

"Niall, don't even."

"Shut up, Harold, lemme think." Niall held up his hand as he shushed the other brunette.

"In the meantime..." Isaac trailed off, shaking his head at Niall, who was still trying to come up with another nickname for the girl he'd just met. But the photographer never got his chance to finish as his manager Lee appeared out of nowhere and grabbed him by the arm.

"Where's the girl?" Asked the manager, leaving all four people confused.

It took Isaac a second to remember and realize what that meant. So he quickly pointed to Y/N and said that she was the girl.

"Good, good." Lee nodded quickly, holding both Isaac's and Y/N's hand as he laughed. "Blair and Cyrus Archer wanted to see you both."

"The Archers? The twins who shoot for Vanity Fair?" Y/N asked and everyone looked at her in shock, all wondering why she had that knowledge. Shyly, she told them she'd done a bit of research about the industry before she came, so she wouldn't end up looking like a fool.

"Oh, she's smart too! How great!" Lee squealed in excitement as he squeezed her hand. "They are literally obsessed with that shot of you, darling."

"Wait, what shot?" Harry finally spoke up as it seemed like he was the only one there who hadn't seen whatever Lee was talking about. Confused, he quickly followed everyone to another room.

And as soon as he entered, one particular exhibition immediately caught his eyes. It was a portrait of his Bambi. Though the shot was black and white, that beautiful smile on her lovely face was all the colors it needed to radiate joy all across the room.

Harry stood transfixed in shock and disbelief as he heard Y/N whisper to Isaac, "I can't believe you picked that one."

He then replied, "your smile is the brightest in that one."

"Harold?" Niall nudged Harry to pull his friend back down to Earth, but the green-eyed brunette never got his chance to comment on the artwork. Lee jumped right into his mouth, saying he needed to borrow Y/N and Isaac for a moment.

"Sorry boys, networking is key!" said the man as he grabbed the startled pair, pulling them with him towards the twin sisters waiting by the portrait.

Harry couldn't be there much longer. Even though he blamed the overcrowding room for his annoyance, he knew all those people didn't bother him half as much as the happy two standing over there.

"So that's what you two have been hiding from me?" Niall held back Harry's arm as he intended to walk out.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"The girl. Smiley?"

"Bambi." Harry knew Niall made that mistake on purpose to test his reaction, yet he still got irritated, probably because of the nickname alone. "I'll go get a drink, you coming?"

"Then you'll tell me what happened?"

The actor gave his friend a smile, but then brutally killed off Niall's hope with his answer. "In your dreams."

The love song blasting from the loud speaker really got on Harry's nerves, as he looked around at those happy couples dancing and making out with each other. It wasn't even Valentine's Day yet and he'd already felt like the loneliest person in a room.

The after party at Lee's house was massive, and many of the guests were important people in the entertainment industry. Harry swore he knew most of them and they knew him. Still there he was, standing in the corner with a drink in his hand and himself as his own company, like a geek at senior prom.

Across the room, Niall was flirting with a girl Harry had never met before. Isaac and Y/N were nowhere to be seen, and Harry didn't want to guess what they could be doing right now. As if seeing them together wasn't awful enough.

The actor quickly emptied the glass in his hand and laid it down on the table by his side. Fuck, he thought, I really need another drink.

"Well, isn't this the famous Harry Styles?!"

Harry could've broken his neck from turning his head so fast to the sound of that voice.

There she was, his Bambi, walking towards him with a cheeky smile and asked him why he wasn't dancing like everyone else. He told her half the truth, that he wasn't in the mood to party at the moment without telling her why.

Surprisingly, she didn't ask, and just tugged on his arm as she said, "come dance with me."

It wasn't a question, more like a request, one he couldn't deny. So he let her pull him along to the center of the room to join the dancing crowd, thinking about how they used to dance with each other when they were kids; but of course, with them being adults a lot would have changed already.

Under the flashing red and blue lights, Harry couldn't take his eyes of the young woman in front of him. She was swaying to the rhythm of the upbeat song without caring who might be watching her. Her energy fueled him to also let himself loose.

She grabbed his shoulders, pulling him in, their foreheads resting against each other as he finally found the courage to place his hands on her lower back. If anyone was watching them now, they might think they were in love.

"You dance like a grandpa," she teased, raising her voice so he could hear her over the loud music. Harry couldn't help but laugh at her comment.

"Thanks, that's why I act and not dance."

She rolled her eyes playfully, shaking her head as she cracked up.

"Where's Isaac?" He finally asked.

"Oh, he's talking to some people Lee introduced him to."

"Why did he call you Smiley?" The second question had no relation to the previous one, yet Harry couldn't keep second guessing anymore. He assumed the nickname had something to do with the shot of her smiling, but the answer Y/N gave him was beyond his prediction.

"He called me that to remind me to always smile."

Harry nearly lost his balance on his own two feet when he heard those words. Sure Y/N had never been his to begin with, but at that moment, he realized he was losing her.

"Let's be honest, Bambi is a better name." He scoffed and received another smile from the girl.

"Don't you worry," she told him. "I'll always be Bambi."

Though that seemed far from the truth, it was what Harry chose to believe.

"I can't believe the last time we danced together you still had pigtails," he said, beaming at her as he ran his hands through her hair.

"The last time we danced together I still had a crush on you." That response was beyond his prediction but the next thing coming from her mouth put him up short.

"Don't worry, I'm over it."

Harry stopped dancing and so did she, not because she could read his mind, but because she spotted Isaac heading towards them. Harry turned his head just in time his best friend arrived and asked to steal Y/N for a moment.

"Sure. She's all yours," Harry said. Those words had been the hardest to say by far. "I'll see you later, Bambi."

Without waiting for her to reply, he leaned down and kissed her on the cheek to say goodbye. And not until he was walking away from them did Harry realize, he had never kissed her on the cheek before.

It was rather embarrassing to even try to guess her reaction as he headed straight to the bathroom, and he didn't even need to go. He just wanted a place to get away from all those background noises and human interactions, even though those things kept him free from the crazy thoughts inside his head.

The muffled music from outside had changed to Somebody Else by The 1975. And as he washed his hands in the sink, Harry cursed the one who'd made that playlist. Were they trying to narrate his situation at the moment?

I don't want your body But I hate to think about you with somebody else

He needed to get out of there.

"Lee, have you seen Isaac and Y/N?"

The manager excused himself to the guests as he turned to Harry. "They just left together, he told me he was gonna take her home."

Harry thanked Lee, ignoring what the man had to say next and just walked away, pushing his way through the packed room to find the exit. Now that they were both gone he had no reason to be there anymore.

He was just a few steps away from the door when a familiar figure caught his eyes, and for a second there he thought that girl he saw was his Bambi. From behind she surely looked like Y/N, but she was wearing a different outfit.

The girl turned around, sending Harry a smile as soon as she caught him staring. What happened next was very hazy in his memory probably because the alcohol had finally kicked in.

He vaguely remembered approaching the girl and asking her to dance. He remembered them drinking until his head was spinning in circles. He remembered kissing her on the mouth as they called a taxi to go to his place. He remembered taking off her clothes as well as his own. He remembered having sex. But most importantly, he remembered thinking of Y/N the entire time.

And when he crashed down on the bed, sweaty, all out of breath, Harry remembered the feeling of disappointment. The girl said a lot of things to him, yet his ears automatically canceled out all the other sounds apart from his own heartbeats.

As he drifted off, the face of Y/N from earlier as she pulled him close continued to haunt him still.

Y/N giggled as she ran up the stairs with Isaac following right behind her. The lift in the building broke again, so they had to walk five floors to get to her flat, and Y/N would've been so embarrassed if Isaac hadn't already known she was too broke to afford better accommodation.

"Don't be too shocked when you see my room."

"I've been in your room before, love," he said, catching his breath as he took the last step to reach her and gave her a tired smile.

The last time he'd been there was actually on the day they first met. After hanging out together from morning till night, he dropped her off at her place and she invited him in for a cup of tea. That was how they woke up the next morning with him spooning her in her bed, fully clothed of course.

"You were lucky the last time because I'd just cleaned it. I haven't done it again since." She chuckled, pulling out her keys as she opened the door. Then the girl was completely frozen in her spot.

Isaac looked around the tiny living room, it wasn't that bad so he didn't get the shocked expression on her face. It was only when she bent down to pick up a white envelope someone had probably slid through her door gap that he realized the real reason she'd reacted that way.

"Is that a wedding invita—Hey!" He shouted out, reaching for her hands but it was already too late. She'd already torn the envelope to pieces and marched across the room to toss them all in the trash bin. She looked at him, he looked at her, neither said another word, both second-guessing each other's next move.

She knew he wanted to ask her why, but he wasn't sure if what he was wondering would be invasive, so he stayed quiet. Anyway, she was glad he had chosen not to question what she'd done.

"Tea?" She asked with a smile.

"Y/N!"

The way Isaac shouted out her name caused the girl to bat her eyelashes and she finally made it out of her maze of thoughts. The cup of tea she’d made for him had been emptied whereas the one in her hand was still full and had gotten cold.

"What's wrong?" He asked in concern. "You kind of spaced out."

"Nothing. I'm just tired."

Isaac checked the time on his watch and furrowed his eyebrows as he realized how late it'd been.

"I should leave so you can rest."

"Wait!" She stopped him. "We can...We can talk some more...I'm not that tired."

Her reaction made the man laugh as he nodded and shifted a bit to get back to his previous comfortable posture. He looked around the room, at the books and many crumpled up pieces of paper lying all over the floor and on the table between them. It looked like the aftermath of a tornado inside her living room but he didn't have to raise questions for her to give him the answer.

"I'm struggling with my writing."

"Yeah, I figured." He chuckled. "You told me about the book you'd been working on."

"I haven't even edited the first chapter." She rolled her eyes. "But it sucks anyway, so..."

"Can I read it?"

"What?"

"Your first chapter."

"Oh...that...well..." The girl straightened her back, flipping her hair over her shoulders in a nervous manner as she cleared her throat. "I'm sorry but I've never shared my unfinished work with anyone besides my mum and..."

"Harry," Isaac finished the sentence for her, leaving her surprised for a second.

"Yeah." She nodded. "But when it's ready...if it's ready, I'll let you read it."

"I can't wait."

The gentle smile he was giving her had her sitting there with her heart in her mouth. Her anticipation told her he was gonna say something else, so she quickly stole his chance to speak by blurting out, "do you wanna stay tonight?"

"S-Sure." He chuckled, slightly taken aback yet also amused. "If you want me to."

"I want you to," she asserted.

"Okay. Then I'll stay."

Harry woke up in the middle of the night and found himself in his bed with a naked stranger lying by his side. She had her back turned to him so for a split second he imagined it was Y/N though he knew for sure it was not. Y/N's hair smelt like freshly picked apples, not lavender, and she had a little scar on her left shoulder from crashing her bike into a tree when she was eleven. Harry didn't know why he remembered that, but he did. And now he couldn't go back to sleep anymore.

He propped up on his elbows, reaching for his phone on the nightstand to check what time it was. It was almost half past two in the morning. The worst time of the day to be awake. Usually, at this hour, his thoughts would go out of control and he would always end up doing things that he would regret in the morning, like what he was going to do next.

He searched for Y/N's number despite knowing to call her up this late would be cruel, if she had class early in the morning and needed her full eight-hour sleep. However, he missed her too much and desperately wanted to hear her voice. He had no idea what had gotten into him and why he was so needy for her attention. She was his little Bambi. But he seemed to have forgotten that already ever since he got jealous over her relationship, or whatever it was between her and his best friend.

He quietly left the bedroom and made that impulsive move to dial Y/N's number, biting his nails as the beeping on the line continued for what seemed like forever.

But it wasn't Y/N who picked up the phone.

"Hello?"

"I-Isaac?" Harry nearly choked when he heard the voice, still he prayed she'd left her phone in Isaac's car or something. Something. Anything. Let it not be what he had in mind. "Is Y/N there?"

"Yeah, she's sleeping. She told me to pick up the phone."

Harry heard noises in the background like someone shifting between the sheets. And he had the squeezed his eyes shut to fight the thought that his worst fear had come true.

"Who's that?" Her sleepy voice was faint but he could tell it was her talking to Isaac.

"It's Harry."

"Great...You talk to Harry, I'm gonna sleep..."

"Mate, she just...dozed off again." Isaac's chuckle drove Harry insane. "Is it urgent?"

"No...uhm...Her dad just asked me to check on her. It's fine." That awful lie was followed by the worst laugh Harry had ever faked, but Isaac couldn't recognize that over the phone so he sounded so indifferent when saying goodnight and goodbye to his best friend.

Harry's heart died down as soon as the call ended. He dropped his arms down to his sides and leaned against the wall behind him, looking defeated. He stood there, pondering for about five minutes before deciding to head back to bed and trying to get some sleep before sunrise.

The girl who looked like Y/N was still sleeping. He kind of envied her now because he couldn't fall back to sleep, so he just closed his eyes and tried to think about anything but the previous phone call.

As he dug through the memory box in the small dusty corner of his mind, Harry found himself going back to that hot summer afternoon in the treehouse and he could hear her voice reading aloud the story in her pink notebook.

"Once upon a time, there was a boy and a girl, and no one else..."

Harry didn't know how that story ended because Y/N had never finished it, or at least never revealed the ending to him. But how wonderful could it have been, if that was the last sentence of the story instead of the first? Now, he could no longer return to the world where there was no one else besides them two.

#my girl series #harry styles #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles imagine #harry styles imagines #harry styles fanfics #harry styles fanfictions #harry styles writing #harry styles series #harry styles angst #harry styles fluff #harry styles smut #bestfriend!harry #older!harry #younger!y/n #actor!harry

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codylabs · 6 years ago

Text

Chapter 23: Limbo

Links: P 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22

In the middle of Dipper’s mindscape, Mabel’s hunched form stood alone, glancing about uncertainly. “Dipper…?” She asked, as if doubting her own voice. “Dipper, are you… Here??”

Hi Mabel… Yes. I… I guess I am.

She put a hand to her head, as if confused or overwhelmed by something. She stuck a finger in her ear, as if trying to clear a blockage. “Uh…” She said. “Uh… Dipper? Can… Is that you?”

Can you hear me? He focused on thinking the words as hard as he could.

Mabel shook her head again, and turned in a circle. “Uh… No…” She said. “No I can’t…”

…Yes you can. Otherwise you wouldn’t have known to say ‘no’.

“Oh… Yeah… That’s right… I guess… Wait… Where are you?”

I’m looking right at you, uh… I can’t move or speak, I don’t think I have a body… We’re inside… Well, I guess we’re inside MY mind inside YOUR mind I think… I guess I’m dead? Did I get that right? I died?!?

“Uh…” Mabel turned slowly in a circle, her eyes passing right over the place where Dipper perceived himself being. If she couldn’t see him, his form must really be gone. Finally, Mabel settled down onto a nearby rock, with folded arms and a frown that looked annoyed and very, very tired… “Well… Yeah, mysterious brain voice;” She addressed him curtly. “Dipper IS dead… And he can’t come back… So… I think you’re Ford. You plugged me into a weird machine just to talk weird and cheer me up…”

Huh? No, I’m…! Well, I don’t think I am…

“Say something only Dipper would know.”

Uh… He racked his memory for something tangible to grasp onto. Everything was so blurry… So he stared hard at Mabel. At the shape of her hair, and her eyes, her red cheeks, her braces…

Her braces…

In the corner of his eye, one of the many hatches in his mindscape pushed aside some rubble far enough to open a crack. Mr. Upsidedownington is overrated… He finally recalled. Little bits and pieces seemed to follow the scrap. Some incomplete, some without form, some without image, but he mentally recited them as they came. A few more doors opened, here and there. And… And dad won’t let us race syrup after the waffle incident of ‘08… You ship anime characters while I pretend to listen… And… You were the one who invented the awkward sibling hug, but I was the one who named it… Uh… Uh… Dippy Fresh rocks and Disco Girl is stupid… Wait… No, the other way around. Dippy Fresh was stupid, and Disco Girl rocks… And… I don’t know… I can’t really remember what else… Oh, yeah, and you sing in your sleep… You inherited it from mom…

“You…” He saw tears coming to Mabel’s eyes, as she stood up again. Her eyes were searching him out more urgently now. “You… You really are Dipper…”

…Yeah… No… Well… I guess what’s left of him.

“Why can’t I see you?”

I dunno.

“Like…” She sniffled. “Like, just imagine a body for yourself! Everything you imagine comes true in here… Right?”

I… I can’t… I mean… I’m having a hard time… Imagining. I mean, I can’t remember things. And I just feel really, really confused, and I don’t know, I can barely think… I can barely think…

Mabel put her fingers to her head and squinted really hard for a minute, as if trying to be psychic. When she finished, Dipper found he could feel his body again. He looked down, and saw himself.

“Oh.” He wiggled his fake, imaginary fingers, flexed his fake, imaginary neck, and found he could speak. “Hey. Thanks. Uh…”

Before he could continue, Mabel had rushed up to him, wrapped her arms around this fake, imaginary body, and was already crying in his fake, imaginary shoulder. He fell silent. And the hug he gave her back was neither fake nor imaginary.

And so they just stood there like that. It felt like a moment but was probably longer.

Mabel wouldn’t stop crying.

“So…” He finally ventured. “I died, huh?”

The body Mabel had imagined for him flickered for a moment, and he felt parts of it go numb. Blood trickled down his forehead to blind one eye. He looked down and saw that he had a busted leg, big gashes in the chest, and one of his arms missing entirely. It didn’t hurt, not in here, but the injuries were somehow familiar. “Oh…” He said.

“Uhmf!” Mabel gasped and shook her head. “Sorry, sorry…” The body flickered again, and turned back to what they both recalled as ‘normal’. “Sorry… That’s… That was how… I’m sorry…”

“Hey…” He hugged her a little tighter. “It’s okay… Uh… Uh… You know, uh… Wow, 13 years old, huh? That’s… That’s pretty… I… How did I die? What was I doing? And… Why… How… I…” His mind began jumping around, fixating on those unfinished scraps of his life that now would never be realized. Ford’s apprenticeship that I wanted someday… Publishing a book… Hosting a ghost-hunting show… Wendy… Something with Wendy… “I… I had dreams…” He said.

“No…” Mabel sniffled. “Let’s talk about something else. Anything else…”

“…Okay…”

But, of course, one’s own death has a way of dominating the conversation. Neither of them could think of anything else to say.

“So…” Dipper finally released Mabel from the hug, and sat down in the grey grass. She eased herself down across from him. “So, uh… I dunno, is anyone else here? Is… What happened to Wendy? Is Wendy here? No, never mind, I mean… Is she okay? Weren’t we together when…? Did she…?”

Mabel shook her head. “No, don’t worry, she’s fine… Well… Like, she kinda… When… Well, she took your journal and stormed off into the woods 4 days ago and nobody but her dad has seen her since… I… I think Great Uncle Ford said she had radiation poisoning…”

“Radiation poisoning…? Is she okay?”

“I don’t know… The same thing happened to Great Uncle Ford, and he’s fine, just really really sick…”

“Ah.”

“I think she blamed herself for the crash…”

“Crash…?” In the corner of his eye, another memory hatch struggled open. Beyond, he saw a replay of the explosion, the impact, the escape from the wreck… He saw himself standing over Wendy’s unconscious form, and in front of him was… that… “Oh… Oh yeah…” He stared. “I… I died fighting that… Geez…” He couldn’t seem to remember the duel itself, but he saw the beast as it last had stood.

“Yeah…” Mabel sniffled.

“Is Wendy fine…? And… Wait, did I kill it…??”

“Yeah…”

“Wha…? How??”

“I don’t know…” Mabel wiped her eye. “But… You wrecked Gideon’s robot with your bare hands too, and beat Rumble McSkirmish, and won Globnar against a trained adult… This… This is like a stupid habit for you…” She tried to make a joke, tried to smile too, but neither worked.

“Ha ha…” Dipper rubbed his arm awkwardly, and almost smiled. “Dumb habit…”

“Really dumb…”

“Yeah…” He glanced about once more. It seemed to him there was something profoundly important he ought to be remembering right now, but he couldn’t recall what it was… Maybe it would come to him. “Hey, you’re right.” He said. “Let’s talk about something else. Anything else.”

“Yeah.”

The silence stretched on.

“Dipper…” Mabel finally worked up the courage to choke out the words. Dipper thought he could hear her heart racing from where he sat. “Dipper…” She repeated, trying to convince herself to talk. “I’m… I’m sorry…”

“Hey, woah.” He put up his hands. “Don’t blame yourself; I was the one who chose to fight it. You and Wendy didn’t have anything to do with—”

“N-no, not for that, for everything else… There’s… There’s a lotta stuff I never told you, and I never meant to tell you, but now you’re dead and… And I need to tell you so, and… I… Is Ford listening?”

“Uh…” Dipper glanced up at the sky, as if he would be able to see Ford up there, maybe hunched over his computer screen looking down at them. “He was reading my mind earlier…” Dipper recalled. “But I think he’s giving us some privacy right now…”

“Okay…”

“So…?”

“Dipper… I messed up… And I kept messing up…” Her voice broke, and warbled as it raised an octave. “Everything I do I try to do for the right reasons. I try to be nice, and to be sweet, and to love everybody and everything and make them love me… But it keeps breaking! And I want so bad to do whatever I’m doing that I just keep on doing it! Even when it gets stupid and things start to happen that I don’t want to happen, I just keep on being STUPID and SELFISH and DUMB! And… And…” She tried to wipe away her tears, but more just flowed in to take their place.

“Hey, it’s okay, what are you even talking about…?”

“And I’m just lucky!” She continued. “Lucky because everything always works out in the end! Lucky because everyone is always looking out for me! If it weren’t for you guys… Dipper, I’m not a good person at all…” She bent over, as if feeling sick. “I’m not a good person, the unicorns were right! And I’m sorry…”

“Hey, what? No…” He told her. “It’s okay… You’re okay…”

“I’m not though.” She sniveled. “I’m a terrible person…”

“No you’re not… You’re my sister; you’re Mabel! You-”

“Mabel is a terrible person then…”

“Yeah, well… She may have made her mistakes; everybody does bad things now and then… I mean, I know I do… It doesn’t make her a bad person. Just makes her a regular person… And the thing about Mabel? I love her.” He put an arm around her shoulder; it felt cold. “No matter what she’s done. Even if she’s crying, even if she’s hating herself, even if she marries a fish person… Even when I’m mad at her, even when we FIGHT, I’ll ALWAYS love her…! Always! Don’t… Don’t you know that…?”

“But…” She turned away from him by a couple degrees. “But I never told you the things I’ve done… If you knew…”

“It wouldn’t change a thing. I love you. And I forgive you. You understand?”

“But but… Oh… Oh yeah?!? Well… Well guess what?!? Well… Well last summer I almost ENSLAVED sev’ral people! I wanted to make them my toys for all eternity, until my friends stopped me! I never told you about THAT, did I?? And I never told you how I beat up Steve in 4th grade just because he was stepping on flowers… And I stole Rebecca’s birthday cake in 3rd grade because I was feeling really hungry… And I never told you about the vampires, did I? And… And… AND YOU NEVER KNEW WHY WEIRDMAGEDDON HAPPENED!”

“Hey, woah, calm down! That’s all… That’s… Listen…”

“YEAH!” She turned toward him, and was practically screaming at herself. “Yeah, you know how the little snowglobe thing with the galaxyness broke? You know how Bill got into our world?!? I never told you that because I promised I would never tell anyone because I LET HIM IN! I GAVE HIM THE SNOWGLOBE! ALL THE PEOPLE WHO DIED THAT WEEK, I KILLED THEM! I LET HIM IN!!”

“Woah, woah woah…! Hey… Hey… Uh…” As Dipper stood up and wrapped his scrawny arms around her again, he wished they were bigger; wished he could pretend to be strong enough to hold her.

I may not be all that Dipper was. He thought. I may not be able to stand beside her much longer… But I can tell her what Dipper knew.

“Hey… Look…” He said. “You know… You know why I never mentioned this whole thing before?”

“Why, cause you figured I was just a klutz and dropped it?” She snapped.

“Well… At first, yeah… But… But then I figured it out. I figured out why you never talked about it, and why Blendin left his last message… I put it all together; filled in the blanks. And I understand. Not just understand what happened… But I get why too… I do. I get it.”

She sniffled. “You do…?”

“I get what he promised you. I get that you were trying to do it for me… I get that you didn’t know… And for the record, you’re far from the only one, or the first one to fall for him… You were just unlucky enough to be the last.”

“But… But… But he almost gooshed the universe… And… He…”

“We all make mistakes. It’s just life… And as soon as you saw the truth, you worked harder than anyone to save the day, now didn’t you?”

“But…”

“So… That means you’re cool, right? It’s-”

“But that doesn’t make it all okay!” She wailed, shook his arms off, and pushed him away. “Because THAT’S NOT ALL!” She continued. “TODAY… Today I almost did it again!! Because after last summer, Bill left behind a statue in the woods, just a stone statue sitting there with one hand up like this, and… And I wanted you back so bad that I almost shook his hand and almost let him in AGAIN! I almost accidentally the whole thing AGAIN…! So… So how about THAT! Explain THAT away! Justify THAT! Tell me I’m still a good person after THAT…! I’m… Grunkle Stan found me and saved us all again… And… And… And also I was so mad at the robots for killing you that I tried to kill Juan with my bare hands, even though he never did anything and he’s just a BABY, and that makes ME the monster and… And… I’m so sorry Dipper, I’m so sorry…” She buried her face in her hands, and sobbed.

Dipper considered this for a long while.

Well, this was a dilemma.

What could he say? Could he call her evil a ‘mistake’ to try and lessen the blow? Could he tell her she hadn’t been in her right mind? Could he tell her ‘all’s well that ends well’? Could he tell her they were certain that Bill was dead for good? Could he tell her that anybody would have done the same thing in her place? Could he tell her that nothing wrong had been done?

No. For those were all complete lies.

She was right; there was no rationalizing or justifying her actions. She HAD done wrong. She HAD willingly repeated the mistakes of the past. She had betrayed herself and everyone else, and tried to throw away everything she knew… If things had run a little differently, if Stan hadn’t been there, if some piece of Bill really was still alive and present in this universe… She may very well have let him have his way. She might have. And she’d meant to.

His sister was guilty.

…But she was sorry.

So the only true thing Dipper could tell her was: “I forgive you.”

Ford kept his eyes off the screens; he’d promised Dipper’s simulation a time of privacy with his sister. After all they’d both been through, it was the least he could do.

He found a few cushions and propped them up as best he could around Mabel’s neck. Sleeping sitting up like that for hours on end couldn’t be easy on the neck, especially not when you’re wearing a helmet the size of a colander.

As he squeezed the last pillow in there, he took a look at her face. There were dark rings under her eyes, tangles in her hair, tear stains on her cheeks, and her face was almost pale; the last few days must have been horrible for her. Indeed, he didn’t think he’d ever seen her looking this bad. Even during Weirdmageddon, where showers, clean clothes, and fresh water had all gone extinct, she’d stayed strong and happy and hopeful. Even when messed up and dirty and oppressed on the outside, she’d always seemed to be… Glowing inside…

Pity what it all had come to. Such a pity.

But as he watched, a change came over her. Tears began to trickle down her face. But she didn’t struggle or move or show any other sign of distress; indeed, the beeping of the heartrate monitor seemed to slow down.

And on the edge of her mouth, there appeared the first hints of something precious: a smile.

Finally a smile.

Ford breathed a sigh of relief and shot a glance at the biological diagnostic screen. The Dipper backup file was decaying fairly rapidly inside Mabel’s head, and would eventually reach a point where he was no longer compatible with his sister’s brainwave. They’d have to uninstall him at that point, and, hopefully, be left with a Mabel in slightly better condition… One step forward, three steps back, I suppose. He thought. Even if we can’t save him, perhaps he can save her… I wonder what happened to her. Stan seemed to think this was pretty urgent.

Ford eased himself to his feet. Dipper wasn’t decaying quite as fast as anticipated; they still had 5 hours or so left before terminal failure.

Ford shuffled over to an old couch in the corner of his study, set an alarm for 4 hours, and eased himself down for a nap. The ever-more slow and calm beeping of the heartrate monitor lulled him off to sleep, though he couldn’t shake a vague, implacable feeling of paranoia…

“So… Uh… Well, anyway, we’re in the mindscape.”

“…Yeah…” She shrugged.

“So that means this reality is our playground. Like a lucid dream…” He glanced around, fishing for some fun idea she might enjoy. “Wanna imagine… Like… I dunno… Jetpacks or something?”

She seemed to consider briefly, and shrugged.

“…Rainbow powered jetpacks?” He elaborted. “…Made of Plush?”

“No…”

“Why not?”

“Not in the mood.”

He chuckled. “I think somebody mixed up our lines.”

She smiled off one corner of her mouth. “I guess somebody did…”

“Well… Come on…!” He encouraged her. “We’re inside my brain… I mean, normally you’d fight tooth and nail to dig up all the secrets and deep, dark thoughts… There must be something interesting around…”

She scratched her head. Then something seemed to occur to her, and her face finally broke open into her old, familiar, full smile.

Dipper was so happy to see her happy that he didn’t even question for a moment. But then, an enormous, rainbow-powered plush jetpack materialized behind her, swung its big fuzzy buckles closed across her shoulders, and rocketed her into the sky on a thundering blast of color, knocking him for a loop. He stumbled back to his feet, wiping some of the indigo off his face (Was this paint?!?) and looked around for where she was headed.

He saw the rainbow’s vibrant band arc up from his current location, turn a couple loops through the grey air, then swoop down near a shadowy grove of trees in the far corner of his mind.

He had a hunch what that corner was. A signpost leaning nearby confirmed his suspicions: romance. “Of course.” He sighed and smiled at the same time, before imagining a (not rainbow-based) jetpack of his own, and lifting off after her. It’s okay after all… He assured himself, as the rockets began to roar. It’ll all be okay.

She’ll be okay.

He turned the jetpack’s engines forward to slow himself down, then undid his straps and jumped clear just before it exploded on the ground. (Why did he have to imagine it being so explosive?)

Soon as he got his legs under him again, he followed Mabel down through a tangle of brambles and into the romance sector. “Oh, come on, you know what’s in here, Mabel! It’s not like you need to see or anything…!”

“Yuh-HUH!” She grinned back at him. “You never talked about it, and always shushed me when I did, so this is like my one chance!” She began to giggle. Then giggle harder. Her giggling rose to a feverish pitch as she scurried onward. “Besides, just try to stop meeEEE-HEE-HEE-HEE…!

“Uuuuugh…” He broke into a jog as he followed.

By the time he reached her, she’d already popped open several doors, and was moving further down the line.

Dipper glanced inside each as he ran past.

He saw just about what you’d expect: Him and Wendy playing at the arcade. Him and Wendy stunt-jumping the golf cart. Him and Wendy playing marbles with the jar of eyeballs. Him and Wendy messing around at the pool. The smell of her beef jerky still lingering on the goodbye letter… Each memory made him awkwardly blush a bit more, until he was sure his fake, imaginary face was as red as a stop sign. Mabel’s laughing didn’t help either.

He finally caught up to her when she stopped for a minute to inspect the contents of a particular door. He jogged up behind her. “Mabel, please, do—”

“Okay.” Mabel grabbed his cheeks and pointed his head toward the door. “WHY. Is THAT in here?”

The memory was him and Wendy trapped underground, being swarmed by the endless hordes of ravenous, razor-sharp, creeping, crawling, alien robot bugs from chapter 13.

“Uh…” He scratched his head. “Why is that in ‘romance’, you mean?”

“Just… Why?” She rubbed her temples. “Killer robots, fighting for your life… And then romance. Really. I… Uh… I don’t quite see how that fits really.”

“Well… Y’know… I was doing it with Wendy so I guess… Eh...” He shrugged. “I dunno. It felt just a tiny bit romantic at the time. If you were there you’d have been having fun too.”

Mabel looked again. The robots were tying Dipper down and starting to drill through his armor. He dropped his gun and was starting to really panic as their cutting bits burrowed deeper. “You do not look like you’re having fun.”

“Yeah, well, I was.”

The memory showed Dipper screaming for help. Wendy wasn’t able to reach him, but hollered at him to find his magnet gun. Her voice was the one non-hectic, confident part of the scene, and Mabel saw Dipper’s memory hold onto her voice, and use it to calm down. He reached out his hand, wrapped his fingers around the gun, and pulled the trigger. The EMP ended the battle, and Wendy finally reached him.

She hugged him, and promised it would be alright.

Mabel could see how much they cared about each other. “Oh.” She nodded. “…I get it now.”

“Yeah.” Dipper shrugged.

“Okay, enough of that, what’s over this way?!?” Mabel shook her head and rushed off.

Dipper saw where she was headed: a place where the trees crowded together ominously overhead, and the path sloped downhill, down into deeper and darker parts of his memory…

“What, NO! NO don’t go that way!” He squealed. “That looks like, I dunno, really forbidden stuff! Like stuff I don’t think about, or try not to think about or whatever! See?” He pointed to the wayside. “My subconscious even put up a sign here that says ‘off limits!’”

“What was that?” Mabel asked. “That sounded a lot like ‘blackmail fodder’ to me…!”

“Augh!”

“Hey, here’s one where Pacifica hugs you!”

“Look—”

“Ah-HA! And here’s where she kissed you on the cheek after your date! I always wanted to see that part… Aww that wasn’t a very long kiss at all! Shaaaame!”

“Won’t dignify with response.”

“Where’s the rest of the Pacifica junk?” Mabel peaked in a few other doors. “I can’t find it anywhere? Didn’t you help de-curse her house…? And where’s the rest of the date?”

“Probably over there.” Dipper pointed way across his mindscape, toward a more secure, less shady area. “’Paranormal event records’.”

“Why’s it all the way over theeeere?”

“Because, umm… Duh.”

“Hmm…” Mabel opened another door. “Oh, hey, there’s that girl! That… Like, that one girl! One of the girls that you flirted with during the road trip! …Hey, where’s Candy?”

“I would be profoundly confused if you found any candy down here.”

“No, not candy as in sugar snacks! I mean, like, Candy Chiu!”

“Oh… Her. Yeah, same for her.”

“Yeah, well… OOOOH HEY LOOK!” Mabel found a small, boarded-up door, stuck her fingers into the crack, and levered it open. “It’s Abby Lenin from 4th grade! I never knew you had a thing for her!”

“I dunno… Like… She could play piano and that was kinda cool…”

Mabel watched the memory, and gasped. “You gave her a valentine’s day card? I never knew that!”

“Yeah, well, I almost got a nervous breakdown writing that card. And then she didn’t give me one back, and wouldn’t talk to me for a while, so… Yeah. That door was tiny and boarded-up for a reason.”

“Yeah, okay, that makes sense. But how about now we… GO DEEPER!” Mabel turned and sprinted even further down the path. “How about THIS one then?” She flung open a very deep door. “Heeeey, who the heck is that? She looks like an adult…?”

“Hmm?” Dipper peeked over her shoulder to see what all the fuss was about. “OH AGH! Mabel that’s not even a human! That’s an anime character!” He grabbed her hand and tried to pull her off the door.

Mabel burst into uncontrollable laughter, and wrapped her arms around the handle. “Who is she?!?” She screeched hysterically. “What anime is she from?!?”

“Like, just some random thing I found on the internet! I don’t know! She’s like a secret agent cyborg ninja or something stupid and you really…! GRR! JIK! AKK!” Dipper got his fingers under her fingers, pulled them free of the handle, slammed the door shut as fast as he could, and then ripped the entire doorframe off the wall.

He stuck the doorframe under one arm, and extended his other to keep Mabel a safe distance away from it. “Look, it was kinda cool, but it shouldn’t even be in romance!” He pointed to the removed door. “I’m putting this over by my Star Trek junk! Now can we please just turn back! We’re getting into the weird, repressed stuff now! I bet none of this has even been in my conscious mind for, like at least a year now!”

Mabel stuck the sleeve of her sweater in her mouth, and chewed for a minute as she glanced deeper down the path. She was beginning to see the wisdom in that… “Uh… Just one more?”

“And then you promise that we leave the romance sector?”

“Fine.” Mabel carefully selected one last door, and opened it…

“Dude.” Said the memory of Wendy. “You’re lying on my bra.”

The memory of Dipper screamed his lungs out and fell off the bed.

Mabel giggled and closed the door. “Okay, let’s go.”

As they walked out, Dipper breathed a pent-up breath in through his nose and out through his mouth. He wanted to be mad at Mabel for what she’d just did… He wanted to be even slightly annoyed… But anything negative was rather difficult. He glanced at his sister out of the corner of his eye, and saw her braces glint from within her smile.

Given what she’s been going through. He thought. I’m happy to see her smile… Really, that’s all that really matters, isn’t it? “Hey…”

“That part of your brain is big and weird.” Mabel interrupted, gesturing one thumb over her shoulder.

“Uh… Yeah. But yours is probably bigger and weirder and crammed full of miscellaneous hunky guys, so shut up, that’s what.”

“Ha ha! Yeah… And really, yours wasn’t as big and weird as I thought it would be.”

“Oh… Well, that’s good.”

“Now how about we talk about your crush on Wendy?” Mabel poked him in the cheek. “You know, that one you totally just moved past last year… The one you know will never work out and that you swore to just forget about…?”

“Ugh! …Uh… Yeah… I guess I forgot to forget…”

“I always knew you forgot.” Mabel smiled. “You two have been practically glued together ever since we came back this Summer.”

“Ha ha… Ehhhhuuuuhhhh… Yeah, just a one-way train to nowhere. That’s what that is.”

“Whaaaaat?? Whaddaya mean?

“Come on. She’s a chill, athletic, 16-year-old human girl, and I’m a broken-down, laggy simulation of the brain of an awkward, sweating 13-year old… I mean really, come on.”

“Bah! We…! Uh… All this… Well… Well, if this hadn't of happened, I think it would have worked out.” Mabel said. “…She likes you.”

“Umm… No. No she doesn’t… I mean does she? Do people say that? Who says that? Does she really?”

“Okay then…” Mabel stopped walking. “…Did she dance with you? Remember? That night when we had the big party? I went up to set up a sleepover with Grenda and Candy, and what were you two doing?”

“Umm…” Dipper scratched the back of his neck. “Oh yeah…” His voice got small. “I, uh… I guess we did dance, huh…”

“EEEEEEEE! WAS IT BEAUTIFUL?”

A door hesitantly creaked open behind them. Party sounds echoed in through it, and Mabel saw the magical moment unfold… Well, it wasn’t really all that magical. Dipper never did just straight-up ask her, he just kind of started awkwardly dancing on his own, then she jumped up and joined him and started firing party crackers everywhere… The never held hands, never twirled together to the slow music, never did anything intimate at all really, but both of them were beaming the whole time.

“Umm… Yeah…” Dipper admitted. “It wasn’t all that beautiful really.”

“But look! Boom! Right there man!” She pointed to the door. “Look at her face! She’s having fun! That means she likes you! You don’t dance with people and enjoy it that much when you don’t like them!”

“Uh… Huh… I dunno. I guess… I couldn’t dance though.”

“So? Nobody can dance perfectly right away. My first time, I almost drowned in the punch bowl.”

“…Surprising no one.”

“I bet if you asked her on a date now, she’d be happy about it… I bet she’s waiting for it.”

“Well…” Dipper spread his arms toward the grey landscape around them. His fake, imaginary body flickered once, to fully remind Mabel of how absolutely, entirely un-date-able he was at the moment. “It’s not like there’s any point talking about it.” He told her.

“Yeah…” She nervously fiddled with her sweater for a minute, then turned and left the romance sector entirely. “Hey, c’mon!” She said. “I bet we can find a lot of cool memories over there!”

“Yeah, I bet…”

He pushed Wendy from his mind, and continued after her.

Ford lurched awake two hours before his alarm. He’d just had the strangest nightmare… A nightmare where a terrible enemy lurked both near and far, between and among, above and below… Who was it?!? Where was it?!? WHEN was it?!? He hadn’t a clue, but he knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that everyone was gone.

Everyone, every single one of his friends, family… Dipper, Mabel, Stan, Fiddleford, even the Corduroy lass, every last one of them, GONE. Were they dead? Were they insane? Or both? Or worse? Yes, they were all dead, and worse! But even more certainly, they were just utterly GONE! There was NOBODY LEFT! AND I WAS THE FIRST ONE TO GO!

He shook his head. No… All a dream… No, nothing but a dream… Just a dream. And, as everybody knows, dreams never mean anything at all…

He fished his phone out of his pocket, and pressed 2 to speed-dial Stan.

The line was quiet for a moment. Then it connected to his voicemail. “Get outta here lady!” Stan’s pre-recorded voice snapped. “I ain’t goin’ ta your resort, and I’ve told ya that 5 times now, so quit calling me! Beep.”

“S-Stanley…?” Ford stuttered. “I’m sorry, just… Just call me back. Just call me back. I’m sorry… Uh… Is everyone alright? Just need to know… Call me back. Sorry.”

He hurriedly closed the phone again.

What’s wrong? He racked his brain. What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with him? Why didn’t he pick up? Why am I so scared right now? What the heck is with that stupid nightmare? Why does it still feel more real than reality? What the devil is happening?!?

He looked down at his hands. Two palms, two thumbs, twelve fingers, fifty-three wrinkles, he counted twice. Every one of them shaking and sweating. Look at me. He thought. I’m already half-dead from the radiation poisoning of that blasted crashed ship… He was still on a liquid diet, and the past few days had been spent fading in and out of a dreadful fever. What more might it take to kill me?

He looked over at Mabel, comatose and helpless, plugged into the machine. What more might it take to kill her?

He looked at the computer itself, a most delicate assembly of wires, transistors, and little brown chips. What more might it take to erase all we have left?

No… No… ‘Just a dream’ my butt! Dreams… Dreams! What if… What if, what if…

What if what if what if…

Whatifwhatifwhatif…

WHATIFWHATIFWHATIF…

He struggled to his feet, grabbed a shotgun out of a cabinet, and collapsed back onto the couch with the barrel pointed toward the door. Without once taking his eyes away from it, he reached a trembling hand out, snagged half a mug of stone-cold leftover coffee off a shelf, and downed it in one gulp. This is a secure area. He reminded himself. Nothing could break in here. I can sit here and defend Mabel when something terrible happens… Or until… Until I come to my senses… Am I really going mad? I hope not, but what if? What if…

His eyes quickly grew sore from staring, his ears remained sharp, his fingers sat loose across the trigger, and so did he wait.

He waited…

What if what if what if…

What if I just haven’t been getting enough sleep?

What if I’m slowly going crazy?

What if it’s all real?

Just on the threshold of his hearing, he thought he heard something moving in the Shack above.

What’s if it’s already much too late?

Dipper pried the weeds and clutter off a hidden door, and got it open a crack. “Hey, look! It’s our first show and tell!” He smiled when he recognized the scene. “You remember that?”

“No…!” Mabel hurried over. “Did you really find it?”

“Yeah! Check it out…”

They watched the memory together.

“You brought a Lego X-wing.” She put her hands on her hips. “Because of course you did.”

“And you brought… Oh yeah. Look at that. A pinecone.”

“Wait, is that really a pinecone?” Mabel squinted hard at the memory of the shiny, egg-like object. “Are you sure…?”

“Yeah. It was so covered in glitter that nobody thought it was… I was the only one who believed you.”

“Ha ha…”

Dipper straightened up. “How ‘bout you? Did you find anything good?”

“Yeah, over here…!” Mabel beckoned him over to another part of his mind, and showed him a door. The scene it recalled was Dipper playing with model dinosaurs, making a pretend documentary. Little did he realize, Mabel was sneaking up behind. In an instant, she snatched his plastic camera, and ran off through the house, laughing like some kind of maniac… It seemed horrific to him at the time, but they both had a good laugh about it now.

They closed that door and continued on.

There was a lot of good stuff in this part of his mind. A ton of strange, hidden little memories here and there, memories that both of them had forgotten they’d made together… Bedtime stories, baking cookies, playing tag, stargazing, minigolf, the waffle incident… Even that time in Kindergarten they’d tried to dig a hole to the other side of the world, and Dipper insisted on bringing flippers and snorkels for when they came up in the Indian Ocean… That was fun.

Mabel ran on ahead to inspect another group of memories, her face finally alight were her smile.

As he ran after her, Dipper’s eyes strayed across all the great expanse of the inside of his brain.

Huh. He thought. We might’ve gone our entire lives without ever thinking of this stuff again. It’s only now that I’m dead that we really take the time to go back and relive all the good times… Only now do we realize how good we had it…

But I’m still dead… Which means all these doors, all these memories, all this stuff I have locked away, it’ll all just vanish into oblivion as soon as they unplug Mabel. And nobody will ever see them again… Nobody will ever remember them again. Nobody will ever even care.

I guess it’s like our lives. We’re all impermanent. We’ll all pass on. Everything we do will fade into obscurity and disappear, leaving nothing behind, not even a memory… And all we can do, all I’m doing right now, is procrastinating that… Delaying for a few hours the onset of eternity, the eternity where I am forgotten…

He shook his head. No! Don’t think about that… Don’t think about the future, think about the past instead… Because who wants to go to the future?

Don’t think about the future.

Don’t think about it…

Don’t think…

Future…

Mabel noticed he’d stopped running.

She turned around curiously, and saw the look on his face.

“What’s wrong…?” She asked, as if she didn’t know.

He tried a few times to compose his voice and gather his thoughts, but he couldn’t really hold back his tears. “Remember me, Mabel.” He finally managed to choke.

She took a minute to process that, then ran up and wrapped her arms around him. “Don’t say that Dipper!” She pleaded. “You know I will! I’ll remember you forever and always and you know that and I love you and…! And we’ll bring you back and it’ll be okay and—”

“No!” He struggled against her hug. “No, it won’t be okay.” He told her. “Don’t… Don’t hold on to me. Don’t rely on me. Don’t… It… Look, I AM going away, Mabel. I’ll be gone. I AM gone. Ford said this simulation is decaying, which means I’m basically rotting in fast-forward… And… Look, even if you DO somehow bring me back, as a robot or a clone or… A centaur? Heck if I know… I still won’t be able to be there for you all the time… You’ll still head off on adventures from time to time without me… Go on dates without me… Go to college without me… Get a job without me… Raise a family without me… Sooner or later… You’ll have to learn to live without me.”

Mabel eyes fell.

“And you…” Dipper struggled to find the right words. “You know what would make me happy? What I need you to do? What… What this entire world needs you to do?”

“What…?”

“You need to be stronger, Mabel… No matter what happens, to me or anybody else, we need you to be strong. Strong enough to hold together when something hits you. Tough enough to take a thousand hits and never break… So that you’ll never lose your hope, so that Bill will never tempt you, so that you’ll never be hoodwinked by some jerk guy… Just… I dunno. Don’t build your entire life on me being there for you, but don’t change a lick, even when something goes wrong… Be hopeful. Be loving. Be cheerful, and caring, and good… Be that way forever. With or without me. That’s… That’s what we need you to do.”

She held his eye for a long minute, then nodded slowly.

“I will.”

“I love you, Mabel… More than the world.”

“I know.” She nodded. “I love you too… More than the world.”

“I know.”

“And I’ll remember you.” She said. “I promise I will… I’ll remember everything…”

“I know… And thanks.”

A loud, distant sound interrupted them. A noise like a blast, that echoed into Dipper’s mindscape from somewhere beyond, resounding between the clouds and trees like a whisper of another world. Mabel was seized by a sudden spell of dizziness, and put her fingers to her ears.

“Was that a gunshot?” Dipper frowned.

“I dunno…” Mabel scratched her head. “Was that from real life? Did that, like… Maybe he accidentally bumped the helmet. Or maybe he’s trying to wake me up? I dunno, but that did not work.”

“Uh… Uh… I dunno, but we might not have a lot of time left.” Dipper assessed. “Okay.” He turned back to Mabel. “If this is it.” He said. “Uhh… Uh… Okay, just be careful out there. Be careful. Dying isn’t something that only happens to soldiers, old geezers, and evil henchmen, alright? It’s fast, easy, and it sucks.”

“Got it.” She nodded. “But… Uh… Okay, what do I do? What do I do? You and Wendy were right in a middle of some mission to find out where those alien robots came from, and to save the day or something, right? What do I need to do to finish it?”

“Uh… Okay, we found out where they came from: they were all farm animals brought to this planet aboard that giant ship. They came from a low-gravity, airless planet somewhere in another galaxy, but found they could survive after they crashlanded here.”

“Farm--?”

“The farmers themselves are dead, so they don’t need the animals anymore. Wendy and I were going to… Uh… To reprogram the gravity engines in the main ship to smash the entire robot forest… I don’t know. Maybe Wendy’s already on it.”

“… And that’s it?” Mabel winced. “They have to die?” She knew she’d do whatever she had to, but that didn’t mean she’d have to like it.

“Yeah…” Dipper answered. “Well… Actually no… Actually I don’t know.” He caught himself. “We really didn’t see any other way, we didn’t think of anything else. But we have to get rid of ‘em somehow. They’d do no good for mankind, only harm…”

“But what if…” Mabel wrapped her head in her sweater sleeves. “Hmm… What if… Hmm… What if there was a happy way?”

“I dunno, people might not go for it…” Dipper shrugged. “They were the ones that killed me, after all.”

“But they didn’t mean it… And… And they aren’t all bad…”

They were suddenly interrupted, as loud, voiceless words pounded through their minds:

-INPUT: The mindscape interface is ending. Prepare to exit.

“No! Wait!” Mabel looked up at the sky and waved her arms, as if that would do anything. “Wait Great Uncle Ford! Not now! Give us half an hour or something! Not now!”

-NOW UNINSTALLING GUEST BRAINWAVE.

-HOST BRAINWAVE, PREPARE FOR DISCONNECTION.

“But…!”

-UNINSTALLING:

- 2%

“LOOK!” Dipper grabbed her. “If there’s a better way, if there’s a happy ending here, a way to make things okay again, with me, with the robots, with everything…! Then you WILL find it! I believe in you! Just… Just I know you will. You always see the upside. You always bring the upside. It’s who you are… O… Okay?”

- 5%

She got a feeling in her gut; a feeling that agreed. “Okay.” She said.

- 7%

Dipper’s body flickered once, and he felt himself leaving. This might be it. He thought. I’ll never remember this, and I might never even live again. This moment, this might be all.

- 10%

“Do you think there’s a God?” He asked.

- 11%

Mabel blinked.

- 13%

“GOD!” Dipper turned his head skyward. His voice was starting to lose its form and its steadiness, though whether that was from panic or from getting disconnected, nobody could tell. Nonetheless, he prayed. “If you’re there, please save us! Help Mabel to be strong! Help Ford and Wendy and Stan to know what to do! Make everyone do the right thing…! Please help everything turn out all right!”

- 24%

“And God!” Mabel added. “Please bring Dipper back from the dead!”

- 32%

Mabel’s head began to hurt.

- 39%

Her sight got blurry for a minute, and when it cleared, Dipper was no longer there.

- 46%

The mindscape around her began to fade in and out; parts of it began to glitch and disappear.

- 58%

Trees toppled. Rocks split. Doors shattered. The ground crumbled beneath her.

- 72%

She felt herself falling.

- 85%

The pounding in her head became excruciating.

- 91%

Up was down and in was out and sane was mad and he was gone,

- 95%

when suddenly,

- 100%

Input: deactivating motor and sensory dampeners. Subject is awakening.

She awoke.

The massive computer buzzed tiredly as it finished its work and turned off. The helmet was warm from all its recent electrical activity. The pillows were damp from the tears she’d shed in her sleep. Her neck was just a little cramped from so long asleep sitting up.

The was a big hole blasted in the door, and a lot of overturned furniture and broken equipment.

Ford was nowhere to be seen.

Instead, there was only the monster, looking down at her.

She looked up at it, and remembered that the world still needed her to be strong, brave and kind. She still needed to keep her hope. “Please God.” She whispered quietly, as she tried to smile. “Please help everything turn out alright.”

The Shapeshifter shrugged.

#The Forest Of Daggers #wendip #wendy x dipper #gravity falls #scifi #wendy corduroy #dipper pines #shapeshifter #see you next summer #fanfiction #fanart #alien #robot #ghost #wendipweek #limbo #playdead #game

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