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#it doesnt help that im feeling absolutely horrible
4byun · 2 years
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(´ε` )
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ableedingpromise · 2 months
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God I'm so fucking annoyed how come she gets to treat me however she likes and then gets to say she didn't mean it?????
#have u considered not constantly comparing me to ur abusive husband who hit u??????#since i was like 8 its really fucking weird#like who in their right mind tells their child theyre naturally destructive just like their father and then says ohhhhh but i didnt mean it#are u fucking insane#doesnt help that i look like him too everyone tells me that#and now she acts like me raising my voice once means she needs to walk on eggshells around me wtf#what about how u treated me from ages 13-16#freak#i cant believe this shes treating me like im some scary stranger as if shes not the one with full financial control and that im this horribl#person go kill yourself omgjdjsjsjwjwwhwhhw#fuck u#last year was the worst year of my life and that was wholy bc of u you showed me what place i really have in this family and that it was not#hing. how is sveryrone so ready to throw me away??#yet everyone else gets to say shes sooo proetctive and loving fuck off you wouldnt even tell them youre treating me badly diedie diediediedi#i want to cut so bad bro#but i promised myself i wont so#i mean i dont even have any way of gettibg blades so whatver#just remembered her reaction to me cutting#nothing. yeah absolutely no reaction. i thought the worat thing that could happen was her gettjbg mad at me again but no#i realised there was somwthing worse. she just straight up doesnt care#useless mother#im fine w u treating me like shit ive accepeted it that i have no place in anyone's life unlesss i hive into this but at least#at least stop trying to confront me like this#just let me rot in peace#i really dont want to do this anymore#any time now she'll ask me if i was pretending to cry so i wpuldnt have to go out w her now#as if that isnt insulting#and then she'll say i wasnt trying to be rude!!! as if she hasnt always treated me like none of my feelings r real. i only ever overeact. ok
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rapidhighway · 6 months
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ngl i had a couple rough days regarding my food intake and im just losing my fucking mind rn
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angelstrawbabie420 · 1 month
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crazy how i have no one
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#like yes i have my internet friends and i adore them ofc#but i have no fucking one irl#and i mean no one. my mom’s side of the family is all dead and the other side is uber christian and doesnt give a fuck about us#i only have my brother#and i need help and support so horribly bad but i wasnt there for him when he needed me#so why the hell should he be there for me. he shouldnt#im going to have to rely on myself this time and i cant do that#i dont trust or believe in myself whatsoever#i think im fucking horrible and useless and repulsive#and idk how to be nice to myself bc ive never felt that and i dont know how to self soothe#i dont have the energy physically or mentally or emotionally to learn#and idk what to lean on anymore if i want to quit abusing substances#realized recently how much i do that.#and for how long. a decade. ive been acting like a 13 yo this whole time#idk how to move past and grow up. god i absolutely need to see my therapist again. if she’ll have me#i fear ill be rejected tho ive left and came back several times and last time she said ‘ofc ill take you back youre my person’#whatever that means. ive been an anomaly to every therapist/psych ive been to apparently they all mention how weird i am and how they cant#figure me out. like damn me too doc!#i want to email her so bad but i wont be able to see her until my insurance goes thru and i dont want to get free labor out of her if i dump#all the trauma ive sustained since i last saw her on her yw#but i want to get better i dont want to live like this anymore i cant do it#any of it#my coping mechanisms are all self destructive and i want to grow past that#but i need help and i dont have it. not really#whatever i guess. first step call and see wtfs going on w my insurance#i feel like i need help even for that . i feel so utterly incapable of everything snd i always have#i can do it. i can do it
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tortademaracuya · 1 year
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#idk why i thought it would be different this time#im an absolute idiot. im too fucking stupid to comprend all this shit#'maybe my professors will know how to help me' they never tell me shit. they havent helped me at all. i feel so stupid every correction#no matter how much i read or what i watch its like i cant understand anything#i used to love programming!!! i used to actually know what i was doing!!!!! when did i become so stupid!!!!#should i aak for help from someone else? probably! but i dont want them to know how much of an idiot i am#just kidding. i know all my friends know how stupid i am. doesnt mean i dont want them to give them even more proof of that#nor bother them either tbh. why should they have to waste time because im a fucking idiot?#im. such a disappointment#i dont want to do this anymore#every monday is just me going to that stupid class and see how dumb i am compared to everyone else. so pathetic#how did i even manage to pass all my classes? how do i only have my thesis left?#part of me wants to abandon everything but what would i do then? look for a job?#im an idiot and a horrible artist where the hell would i get a job? not like finishing my thesis would change that but. yknow#im so scared. for real how did it end up like this?#everyday i feel more stupid. i remember less. my body hurts a little more each day for reasons unknown#i dont understand how others have any expectation of me#i cant talk to others because everytime i have tried to express any worry i instantly get a joke or mock in reply#im so tired of everything#haunted.txt
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Me: I feel like no one but babe understands the hell I go through mentally
Also me 5 minutes later after he reeneters the room to essentially ignore me because I guess my distress is too much or something: nope no one understands whatsoever at all
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reegis · 9 months
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Yo! Do you have any notes/tips for your coloring process? I've always had trouble with that part of drawings looking good lmao and I really like yours! If not for your specific style, do you have any tips with that in general?
Iv gotten a few asks about how I color but iv always avoided answering because
A) I am absolutely awful at explaining things, and
B) I am a very Very lazy artist you should probably Not do the things that I do
BUT i feel bad gatekeeping(?) my horrible technique if it helps anybody ig ill try and explain so
✨✨✨Welcome to Reegis’ Probably Not Reputable (But Very Long Winded) Art Advice✨✨✨✨
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line art of a random character for the example, just pic whatever colors you have in mind for your base colors, you can try using palette generators or basing it off of existing palettes/characters/whatever I have absolutely no idea how color theory works (& this is why you shouldnt listen to me) so im solely going off of vibes. but it is Rough so onto step 2 & 3
(edit to add i usually start off with the skin hair & clothes on separate clipping layers and merge them together towards the end.. i think i forgot to say that at all here oops)
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I abuse the hellll out of layer blending modes. overlay, saturation & multiply mainly, but also difference, brightness & screen. (just doodle something & try all of em out to get a feel for them honestly ik theres a Lot and they can be intimidating) for this i just wanted a more cohesive warmer tone to start with so i added a peachy overlay & a slight ombré to the hair to add a bit more interest to the character.
then just the most basic of rendering, some blush & highlights just wherever i think theyd go.
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Another thing they tell you Not to do, my next step is to block out all my shading in a vaguely purpleish multiply layer!!! i cant be assed to do it any other way im sorry…. once i have the basic shading down, i lock the layer & go in with air brush eraser & also airbrush in other colors wherever I think the purple is maybe too harsh/clashing
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still wasnt 100% happy with the colors so messed around with some more layer filter/modes/whatever you call them then colored in my line art! i think this is honestly the saving grace for all of my art shshsdhhf color your lines people. doesnt have to be all (i dont, i like the contrast) but it usually helps to make some at least a little less harsh
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then with a little more color tweaking im done! one random sleepy dude, fully colored (by my standards)
and then if a piece needs more dramatic lighting you justttt
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im so serious play around with layer settings! these are just basic multiply & add(glow), there as so many others you can abuse the shit out of & nobody will know or care in your finished piece.
was this?? in any way helpful???? I hope so.
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leelesbo · 2 months
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so this may be a bit of an odd request lol. im not personally into tickeling, but my partner is. i find it really attractive how into it he is, and am super willing to participate for him, but as hes into the lee and ler sides of it, sometimes when im taking the ler role, i sort of run out of ideas on what to say and do LOL. it doesnt come naturally to me like you all who actually Do have the fetish. i basically just picked your blog randomly cause we're the same age and you seem to have experience with it and i dont think he follows you already, but i was hoping you could offer some advice or ideas on good things to say and do that may not be obvious? i'd ask him but he gets so flustered over it that its basically impossible HDFJKGKDFHGL
this is the cutest sweetest ask omfg i would LOVE to help out. i love yapping about tickling you came to the right person (this turned out to be really long so it’s all under the cut LMFAO)
so for teasing, a lot of the times it really depends on Who you’re teasing!! for instance, im not personally a huge fan of the whole “coochie coochie coo” “tickle tickle tickle” thing bc its just Way too babyish and infantile for me, but ive found a lot of people in this community really like it and it flusters them a lot!!! if youre unsure, typical teases like that couldn’t hurt to try!
ok i said “tickle tickle tickle” didnt work on me but Actually in the right context that absolutely could work bc the simple act of Hearing The Word is insanely flustering. fr, if you just keep repeating how ticklish he is, asking if something tickles, maybe even figure out a way to force Him to say the word it should work. there’s smth about knismos where our brain overloads hearing that word and it’s even so hard to say, it’s extremely flustering being forced to say it!!
also, focusing on spots and Talking about how that particular spot is affecting them is killer. if you’re tickling his ribs and it’s making him giggle more than belly-laugh, point that out!!! “oh you really like the ribs, don’t you? you’re giggling so much you can’t even talk! try! go on, tell me how much it tickles!” for me and a lot of other knismos, tickling is a lot about feeling Analyzed. experiment with specific spots and see how differently it affects him. verbally take notes on the differences!
also, emphasize how much he’s enjoying it even if/when he’s Begging for you to stop or move spots. knismos love to pretend we hate it, it adds to the fun of the whole thing. but don’t ONLY emphasize that he’s enjoying it, also throw in how horrible it must be!! how he’s too ticklish to take it, how it must be so bad if he’s screaming for mercy.
(i literally keep thinking of new things to add this is going to be so long sorry)
AND AND AND!!! POINT OUT HOW FLUSTERED HE IS!! how red his face has gotten, how he keeps repeating the same thing over and over bc his brain is fuzzy and he can’t Speak Properly, maybe he can’t figure out what to do with his hands, or he keeps trying to hide his face! LET HIM KNOW U CAN SEE EVERY LITTLE REACTION!!! it’s about the attention to detail babyyyy
tickle teasing can also go beyond the actual Act of tickling. tease him when you aren’t even tickling him!! wiggle your fingers his way, throw the word in casual conversation (“what you said earlier really tickled me”), poke him when ur out in public!! little things :3
when you Are tickling him, make him tell you what spots tickle more. make him help you! maybe choose two spots at a time, tickle one spot and then the other, and make him tell you which was worse (this ofc will take Many trials and retests juuuust to be sure he was right the first time 😌). use different methods and make him choose which is worse! hands or teeth? feathers or raspberries? the list can go on and on and you’ll both be sure to have a lot of fun testing out the varieties of the game lol
okay so i could literally keep going FOREVER but ill stop here for now bc ive already written a fucking essay!!! if you want more i’d be elated to go again, my brain is constantly on Tickle Mode so im always happy to yap about it!!
anyway, hope this helped!! hope you guys have fun, im happy to be of service :3
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sexisdisgusting · 8 months
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mentally ill men are the fucking worst. i live with a bipolar schizo narcissist (yes, actually diagnosed) and i cant even muster enough sympathy to feel bad for him, because all he does every day is use his problems as an excuse to abuse the women in his life. he is manipulative and horrible to my chronically ill mother. he makes me sick. he refuses to help himself at all. all he does is threaten to khs, and at this point i dont even care. meanwhile mentally ill women are able (and expected to) hold steady jobs, raise kids, AND work on fixing their mental health. the double standard is insane.
-🍇 grape nonny (gonna start signing my asks now)
omg... grape nonny my beloved... i adore the idea of signing your asks and i look forward to hearing more from you!
mentally ill men truly are the absolute fucking worse, i knew a woman whos husband would use his anxiety as an excuse to blow all their money on alcohol and abuse her
its like, men normally cannot comprehend that the world doesnt revolve around them but when mental health comes into play, it gets so much worse
especially with this huge corporate push of pro-mental health awareness to sell their fuckass products more, i notice men taking advantage of it and blaming everything down to sexually assaulting a woman on their 'depression' or some shit
im sorry grape nonny, for both you and your mother :( i hope things get better for the both of you, you dont deserve this fuckery
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faerunsbest · 4 months
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ive never sent an ask but im assuming this is for sharing brainrot. so yeah i literally cant stop thinking about tav arriving at the grove, knocking aradin out. later that day after speaking with dammon (and resisting the urge to drop kick kagha into the atmosphere) everyones at camp. tav cant sleep bc shes so horribly stressed, angry at the druids, but also curious about zevlor and his whole deal she cant stand it so she goes for a walk around the grove to clear her mind but finds herself in front of zevlors stone door. to her surprise he opens it and they look at eachother blankly for a moment before the tiefling decides not to ask why. doesnt matter, he cant sleep either. instead zevlor simply retrieves two hand rolled cigarettes from his pocket, lights one with a flame spell on his fingertip and hands it to her before lighting his own. they sit outside the entrance in peaceful silence for a few moments before tav gives in and starts asking so many questions (making sure not to ask anything that could trigger the poor old veteran) and they talk and smoke and drink whiskey until nearly sunrise and theyre tipsy and overtired by the end of the night so neither of them feel awkward about parting with a kiss(or more, why not when youre under the constant shadow of impending doom) AAAAAAAAAAAAAA help
bruh
im sitting here eating a potato and saw this and i SKRUMPT!
am i the brainrot page?! is that who i am????? oh my god im so excited, thank you
on a more related note
THATS AN EXCELLENT WAY TO GET TO KNOW ZEV!
shit thats like being drunk at 3 am on the porch talking shit with a stranger who is your bestie right then. I can just see them talking mad shit right there just venting to each other and they UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER!? Thats probably the most zevlor has felt like himself in AGES because theres no judgement no one is watching or expecting anything from him. they have qustions? great so does he! they probaby woke people up laughing.
i can absolutely see this being the reason zev relaxes a little bit more when tav rolls up. just visibly melts a little bit because 'ah my friend!'
i would wish that they get to sit off on the sidelines at the party smoking and drinking again. maybe theyll do more but its be so cool if they just passed out just leaning back to back like soldiers do. he trusts tav even if hes not coherent
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homoeroticbetrayal · 2 years
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Iconic Homoerotic Betrayal: Round 1
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Round 1 Directory
Context (they're really good very passionate):
Nagi/Reo (Blue Lock)
basicallt bluelock is a soccer program being funded by the soccer association (i swear i know soccer im tryna speed through this) theyre tryna make it so japan wins the world cup and to do so you need a strong striker. so they gathered all the young adults (hs graduates) and put them in this program, which, if you're eliminated, you dont have a career in soccer at ALL. they didnt know this walking into it :p. so reo and nagi met in school and reo saw him (rich kid, gets what he wants but doesnt really know what he wants yk) and said that he has to have him. or....... something. anyways, reo needed someone to learn soccer with and he chose the most antisocial sleepy guy on campus. and then proceeded to be an absolute simp (theres a scene he literally massages his back.) he also has canonically called nagi "good boy" (nagi said "yes boss" to him as well) context for the specfic betrayal was the game required them to be in teams of 3 and this is after reo and nagi's previous team of like 8-10 lost to isagi's team. reo and nagi said that they were going to go to win the world cup together. thats always been their promise. (theyve known each other for half a year i think. which is a short amount of time to be so attached LMAO.)
they also have a second betrayal which is honestly worse than this one, and reo's team loses to isagi/nagi's team and nagi tells him he's done with reo.
its a common theme of nagi never picking reo btw. reo was upset after the game because after you win a mtach you pick someone from the losing team to advance with and NAGI DIDNT ADVOCATE FOR REO HARD ENOUGH I GUESS AND ISAGI TOLD THEM ALL THAT THE BEST CHOICE WAS CHIGIRI. so they had another homoerotic fight that im never getting over. hope this meets ur criteria. they're in their exes era. its slightly better tho because nagi does feel bad/sorry for what he said.
(Other anon, I'll include your essay if they make it into the next round)
Geto/Gojo
"He was my friend, my one and only" ultrapowerful, one tried for it one born with it bitches but the twist is one was so consumed by the twisted horrible nature of humanity he went all Magneto but a lot more murderous while the other one only stays nonmurderous because he believes in changing the system by training the next generation. You don't understand he spared him, you don't understand, Gojo's devastation of knowing that he didn't do anything to help him as he slowly literally ate and ate and ate hate and pain to protect people that didn't protect his own. The devastation of knowing that there was nothing else to say nothing to do no way to help him bring him back he'd changed into someone he understood but simply couldn't support. Geto's betrayal, leaving everything and everyone behind because their way not only wasn't working but it was protecting those who wouldn't protect them. Geto laughed for the first time in ten years after all this when Gojo said something to him , the moment before he (Gojo) killed him, carried his body, refused to have it burned. Geto gets basically possessed and when Gojo sees not!him for the first time he freezes and gets captured, Geto almost breaks the possession momentarily whe he hears his name , he doesn't, Gojo gets captured, Geto is stuck, cursed , dead.
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kewpidity · 3 months
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posting my loz au here cause its like the third time ive lost it and had to recall and retype my thoughts about it, dont mind me or the terrible typos if you read it i was on mobile lol
okay so firstly, this is not a completely solid idea yet, the way i have the triforce divvied up is subject to change and also i realize there actually isnt that much emphasis on the swamp anyway, moreso im swapping their settings around but for now the vague idea is zelda - power, ganondorf - courage, and link - wisdom (this also reflects a bit more in their personalities, so we get a wilier zelda and a calmer link for example)
zelda is a young shepardess living in a nowhere hamlet in hyrule, feeling she's wasting away on the farm and hoping for a great big somewhere else, you know Hero Stuff. she lives with her two aunts (gotta get in that old lesbian rep) who are sheikah women that are also literally not related to her, who are set on keeping zelda on the farm, insisting that the world is dangerous and onlyl fools go out of their way to find it- in fact one would think that they were keeping her hidden away on purpose.
meanwhile, ganondorf is a diplomat from the gerudo nation, and a powerful wizard besides that. a strange and terrible sickness that seems to be magic based has ravaged his people, and desperate for a cure he didnt have the knowledge to make, he sets on into the world to search for anything that could point him in the right direction, in particular places of great age and magic, old temples, castle ruins, etc. all the while trying to keep ignore the gnawing feeling that he might somehow be the cause of the sickness because of a darkness thats been building inside of him the past year, right before things got bad. he doesnt know what it is but it scares him.
and then there's link, who lives deep deep in a forest (probably the lost woods). he was raised by fairies in some old hylian ruins choked with vines and impossible to reach without his assistance. he doesnt get much interaction with the outside world, and locals from the nearest town sometimes tell stories about a ghost that lives there that might help you out or might lead you further astray, so most people are smart enough to steer clear. he's lonely. he doesnt know where he actually came from, and it mostly doesnt bother him, but sometimes he feels a pull in the back of his mind when he looks at the words painted on carved on the temple ruin walls that the fairies never taught him to read, he always feels a bit like he's forgotten something and its Just out of his reach
now the catalyst for all of them meeting is ganondorf traveling through hyrule and stopping at the village zelda lived nearby, and when she heard that a powerful wizard from a distant land was visiting, she snuck out in the middle of the night to meet him at the inn, demanding that he take her with him. he was absolutely gonna say Hell No, but he notices the triforce symbol on her hand (i'll likely have them be a kind blobby birthmark that isnt super obvious immediately what you're looking at) thats v similar to his own, and that pesky darkness welling up in him has a v weird and strong reaction to her presence, and he isnt sure its a good thing, but its Something that must mean Something so he agrees to it
their travels lead them to the forest that link is living in, and they get horribly terribly lost and tbqh link considers just leaving them to stay lost forever, but he also feels that weird pull to the travelers that he does from the temple walls, and figures its worth helping them out because obviously he's curious about the feeling, and v much longing for companionship, like mentioned earlier
the overall plot is basically them going to the various temples, etc that ganondorf travels too (he's kind of in change in the au, since he's the oldest and Obviously most well traveled)
if it wasnt already clear, the darkness he's dealing with is actually the demon demise literally starting to take hold of him so he's got to push on for his people despite it (courage)
zelda is going on a more typical hero's journey sort of thing, where her resolve and overall goodness is tested through the adventure, and she has to find the balance of being righteous and Self righteous (balancing power)
link is kind of unknowingly a vessel for a lot of ancient knowledge that he doesnt know how to unlock, and is literally illiterate, so his journey is a little more vague but basically when he's the key to knowing what exactly to do about demise, maybe the language of the temple is a dead one because thats how ancient it is, and he can unlock the knowledge with some spiritual exploration (so wisdom)
zelda and link are the keys to getting rid of demise here, but none of them realize it
also ganondorf and link fall in love Obviously
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baby-xemnas · 6 months
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PLEASE TALK ABOUT THE LUZO SABAODY/2 YEAR TIMSEKIP STUFF IM BEGGING YOU
oh its so much....its So cute that u know that panel where they step away to talk like "hey where did the bear guy send you to? 😄" its so casual for what a heavy event it was, and how hard what came after had been.....but i kinda love it you know it's not unrealistic to be like haha its fine NOW so we can laugh and have fun and relax and smile again....just like lawbepo hug on zou - bepo is SO happy to see law that he instantly forgets and forgives all the fear and pain law made him feel, it doesnt matter its over!!!
its the same with luzo at sabaody reunion they are all grins and "i cant wait to rediscover you, I'll enjoy learning how youve changed bit by bit, ill savour it like a good meal" long looks. Because its Safe they are together again and they both, they ALL worked to become stronger so they can stay together, so luzo have that sexy confidence about it and instead of regretting the wasted time they think "nothing can separate us now"
and its CRAZY cuz they've been through so much. from the absolute horror of the initial incident, to the pain of finding out what happened to luffy at marineford and zoro going insane because he isnt there for luffy. luffy going through that and not wanting to live afterwards but being brought back Because he has zoro and the others - no doubt in those tears of love and gratitude there was a mix up of guilt for considering offing himself because it would mean hurting THEM. he is very sorry, it passed.
so reunion is So full of joy and comfort Despite that horrible baggage makes it all the more beautiful for them to feel So Light as they fall into each other like: there you are, my love, my home, isnt it amazing how we sync up so effortlessly again - its pure happiness
not only both of them worked and changed and became so much stronger to be able to stay together, not only did they endure so much pain for each other's sake (others' too but u know. its fucking luzo) they also both discovered a facet of their love that only distance could give so theyve matured with it too
its Nuts
zoros devotion got formed under pressure of kuma fight and his training like a diamond. as ive said i love post ts zoro being a shameless trophy wife/bodyguard who is So openly proud to be a dog its DISTURBING (positive. appreciative)
if luffy was possessive before he somehow becomes Worse much to zoros happiness. But luffys determination to be great to reach his goal is inseparable from his greed and selfishness, and that includes zoro, its crazy really because greed usually implies large quantities but with this its intense greed focused on one person (because zoro is luffys only lover and he wants no other. zoro is the best) which makes it Suffocating. in a way even the fact that "thought of zoro saved me from giving up" kind of = zoro is mine completely, its a batshit logic but thats not unusual for luffy -
luffy doesn't want to become king alone - he wants to do it with zoro and the others, his goal is his life, he is nothing without them and it just so happens that zoro is most important there, not making others disposable just cuz they arent sucking his dick but zoro is zoro, zoro was always different, zoro is the most HIS out of this group of people who will die for him
and they all came back...and zoro came back.. it's like by doing that they signed a second new and expanded unspoken contract between them that yes you are our captain Yes we will see you through the end etc
and luffy is so giddy that zoro is there ..not that luffy doubted him but he really feels like celebrating
😊😊😊
(sorry this ended up being a scattered train of thought and i didnt even talk about them fucking but i did cry typing it up if that helps cuz i love them...)
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antisemites will genuinely expect jews to be endlessly patient with them while simultaneously referring to us as nazis, baby killers, pedophiles, etc. honestly no one owes you patience ever, but how the fuck can you even expect to get it while you are constantly hurling the worst possible insults at someone.
yesterday i was gonna try to help dig an antisemite out of the jew-hatred pipeline. they seemed perfectly fine, just misguided, so i was willing to help at first. until they insulted israeli jews and called them "zionazis" and i gave them the ultimatum that if I was gonna help them they'd have to stop insulting people for the duration of the conversation. and it was like a switch flipped. they began to insult jews every other sentence, specifically converts and israelis, so of course i decided to not go through with helping them bc dont insult ppl means dont insult ppl.
the worst part is they were trying to do this while propping me up as a "good jew" and i find that shit reprehensible. i dont feel any warmth when someone is cruel to all other jews and then claims that im good bc im "not like them". surprisingly people insulting those that i care about doesnt make me trust them!
maybe this all says something about leftism that someone besides me could describe better (person was a leftist btw). it's like antisemitic leftists care more about how they appear than helping others. maybe being told "they're horrible, i hate them, but you're one of the good ones! you're better!" is a compliment for them. i dont think antisemites are stupid to the point that they dont realize that they're insulting people, but i do kinda think they believe they're complimenting people when they absolutely aren't.
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hiemaldesirae · 6 months
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Swap AU:
Val wasn't too slow, he didn't come at all to Vox's distress call. He thought Vox could handle it. He spends the first 4 years as Alastor's thrall dead, as do most of the soul that Val owns. (Angel included.) Killing Valentino and the souls he owns gets old, however and sinners are getting tired of the same old pornos, so Valentino gets to go back to work, but thanks to their multiple horrible deaths, Valentino and his contracted souls are alot closer. They even have a discord server dedicated to bitching about Alastor. Now that Vox is back, they've added a sever dedicated to getting pictures of Vox for Valentino so they all don't die horrible deaths--and also, Valentino rewards everyone with every new picture with a raise of 50 dollars, so it's nice incentive.
Alastor on the other hand beside killing Valentino and his contracted souls for the first 4 years, made a shrine with Vox's heads--except for the very first one. That one he slept with. That one remain's in his (formerly Vox's) bed everyday, waiting for Alastor's return everynight so he can curl around it and murmur the words he never got to say to his beloved Vox one last time.
When Vox returns, Sir Pentious joins the hotel because Vox has always been his favorite of his favorite of the Vees, and if he's joined another Overlord and started something else, the Sir Pentious will try it out!
Angel Dust is there because he doesn't want to go through the absolute HELL the first 4 years under Alastor was, he wants no repeats. No one Valentino included DOES!
Husker actually loves working with Vox, and loves sending smirks at the very pissed off shadow Alastor (not knowing Alastor is watching from the Shadow's eyes.) and the side hugs, the cuddles, Yeah, they might piss off the Shadow and Alastor even even more but he deserves it--Vox still has nightmares about his near death.
OHH okay okay i see. that clarification. Actually made things 1000x worse for me actually im gonna throw up. this val trusting in voxs abilities to the point where it made him lose one of his best friends for years vs show val jumping to vox the moment that it became clear the other couldnt hold his own..... so sickening what the hell. the guilt that val must feel in specific for voxs disappearance and presumed death- honestly hes probably glad for dying so much those first four years because it took his mind off the fact that it was HIS fault all this happened to vox and him and vel. i just want an oddly tear filled reunion scene with the two vees where vox is like "i thought you guys just didnt think i was important enough to come help" and voxvel start actually bawling bc theyve missed him so much and theyre so glad he's back and *safe*. also the discord server inclusion is hilarious as hell thank you for that mental image nonny
oh my GODD thats actually so sweet im gonna be sick. i just know those former heads are kept clean and swept everyday both by niffty and alastor himself, and the one in his bed is probably propped up by all the most comfortable pillows while alastor himself just goes without a pillow.... WHAT WORDS. what FUCKING words if it was i love you ill actually just implode on the spot nonny ill get raptured and itll be all your fault /lh
+ pentious finally gets an audience with his idol! aww this is so sweet im gonna get cavities. hopefully he doesnt get hit with the kys this time but oh well if he does cause i support my wife committing crimes
Also. Vox having nightmares about the time he nearly died.... do you think that he has like ptsd flashbacks or something everytime he sees a radio. im gonna be SICK fuck oh my god. do tou think ohe day he just . meets al again and immediately tries to run away or something while the other hotel members go to his defense because they know the shit hes been dealing with from al....
p.s. nonny are you planning on turning this into a fic or something anytime soon? because if not.... can i write one based off these ideas 🥹
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offbranddrpepsi · 10 days
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Hello! I'm not sure if you do this so feel free to just ignore this request if you don't :]! Could I request a Reyna X trans! Male reader that already had his surgery but some people were mean to him saying his still a female (how would Reyna react to them, comfort reader, etc) have a great day/night!
I am always open for asks like this because I know how much comfort they can give people as well as it just feels nice to have something like this sometimes. I hope you enjoy it and will be writing it as both top and bottom surgery (though the focus will be top surgery for obvious reasons). This is not proof read as im still a bit sick and finished a book recently so rereading anything makes my brain soup so i apologize for any mistakes.
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Reyna is no stranger to being different though she doesn't understand why it is such a big deal for some. As such she is as well read as she can be when it comes to queer issues, especially if they involve her partner or someone close to her. She may not be perfect but she is always willing to listen and understand. Since day one when you introduced yourself she had asked for your pronouns, a habit Gekko had gotten her into, and didn't ask any questions past that. At that point you had obvious defined hips, despite trying to hide them, and a notable bump in your chest as binders weren't perfect but she never questioned it. You called yourself a man so she did and when you came out to her you could tell the dots connecting in her brain as you spoke. If someone misgendered you she would just very bluntly correct them with a "he." then stare at them with those vibrant eyes until you folded. Reyna was like having a guard dog that, even if they disregarded your identity, made it hard for anyone to disrespect you to your face in her presence. As you two grew closer and became a pair she would get a little intrusive but well meaning. She would ask you about physical things ranging from affection to more intimate ones. How you wanted her to handle you or refer to you, if you were comfortable with her seeing you in certain clothing or ways etc. Reyna is a woman who likes to establish clear boundaries and does so with you so she can be the best girlfriend she can be while also making sure you are comfortable. If permitted she can be found at times stealing your clothes like most girlfriends would, favoring anything oversized or jackets. She never stops gushing about her partner and boyfriend, even talking about how her sister would adore you and probably see you as a brother. At the end of the day who you are at the surface doesnt matter to her as she cares more about whats under it all, appearances be damned.
Post surgery shes adorable and overbearing as you heal. She helps change bandages, drains, even helps you shower if needed. Her radiance lets her monitor your heart rate and body temp so at the first sign of any infection or inflammation shes right on top of it making you take medicine and rest. Once you're healed enough she is the first to nuzzle herself into your chest and sit in silence as she hears your heart beat, you breath, just you exist as a more full version of yourself thats hopefully happier being in your own skin. Given how supportive and loving she is she absolutely takes it HORRIBLY when people are still mean and cruel to you. She makes sure to over talk them with your pronouns and correct name, throwing compliments at you in there as well to make them feel absolutely smothered by her. Of course thats when you're there, when you arent shes snarling and threatening them in the way shes best at. Teeth bared shes asking them to repeat themselves, seeing how dedicated they are to their bigotry before tearing into them. If theres one things Reyna is good at its being scary and damn does she scare them into at least being politely silent. When it comes to comforting you shes your biggest fan already but shes admittedly a tad bad at it because she doesn't really get why they have to be like that. Before it made sense because maybe they slipped up or just weren't thinking but now that you've taken steps to masculinize yourself more she sees absolutely zero excuse. Reyna holds you against her and promises to make sure you don't have to hurt again, to weed out those that would treat you this way. She makes threats of ripping tongues out but calms herself to turn her attention to you. You're the one that was hurt by people to small minded to be accepting, being vengeful won't fix that right now. For as long as you need she is there, holding you and talking to you. She talks you into setting up a date where she introduces you to her family that accept you just as she had. She arranges shopping trips to get you more masculine clothes and even helps you donate your old binders to other trans youth. Reyna even pulls Gekko in to "help his big brother out" as theres just some things about being a man that she doesn't understand but knows having someone like him around would be helpful
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