#it also just makes them look a little dumb which isn’t what they’re going for (I think they’re going for morally righteous)

[goingpheral]

Very funny seeing people on tiktok saying “I never thought Dan and phil were together haha am I the only one” with people in the comments saying “omg me too! I thought they were straight”

Like… okay? Do you want a medal? Or maybe an eye test?

[traveler-at-heart]

Stuck Together - Part 4

Summary: After Westview, Wanda and her children go into hiding. She's not happy with the person in charge of protecting them.

Wanda Maximoff x F! Super Soldier R

“Glad to see you’re getting along” Maria says with a smirk.

“Don’t” you warn her.

The timing couldn’t be worse.

Honestly, the last thing you expected was to end up kissing Wanda in the middle of nowhere. And now that Maria interrupted, you know it’s bound to get awkward.

Sure enough, Wanda is avoiding your eyes.

“Can we talk inside?” Hill says and you turn to look at the Sokovian, allowing her to make the call. She nods, turning to open the door.

“Have you been compromised?” Maria asks in a low voice.

“Huh?” you play dumb.

“You know what I mean. If you can’t be objective…”

“Stop. It was nothing”

“Mhm” she nods, the way Fury would. She truly is his right hand.

Wanda comes back from the bedroom, closing the door. You pull out a chair for her, and lean against the small kitchen counter, waiting for Maria to talk.

“We were worried. You moved houses”

“Position was compromised”

“By?”

“Agatha Harkness” Wanda answers. You don’t know how they know each other, what was she doing after them, but considering she almost killed you, knowing the rest of the story isn’t at the top of your list.

She’s gone, and that’s enough.

“I see” Maria looks between the two of you. “Anything else?”

“Such as?”

“Anything out of the ordinary” 

“Nothing I can think of” you say, but Maria is looking intently at Wanda. “Look, if you wanna know something specific, just say it. I can’t protect them from stuff I don’t know about”

“I take she doesn’t know what happened, then” Maria turns to Wanda, and the way she’s staring at her annoys you. You remember how she mentioned it was classified, which means she was hoping Wanda would tell you everything.

Perhaps even more information than what was found on a file. The fact is, you’re starting to feel used, and nothing annoys you more than being used.

“The short story is…” Wanda’s voice trembles, her accent rolling out like it always does when she gets nervous or pissed off. “I lost control and created a weird… I don’t know, reality. Some people got trapped in it as well”

“A whole town” Maria interjects.

“Well, I didn’t know I could do that. Agatha was also manipulating a lot of the things inside the hex” Wanda defends herself.

You push yourself off the kitchen counter, kneeling next to Wanda.

“Did you kill anyone?”

“No”

“Did you do any of it on purpose?”

“No, I didn’t… I was so upset”

You can guess where this is going. Wanda was gone with the snap, but Vision was killed before that. So she was thrown back into reality, without warning, without a second to mourn.

The way Yelena was. 

“What did you do to upset her?” you turn to Maria.

“Me? Nothing”

“Not you, specifically. The government”

“They didn’t let me see him” Wanda says in a small voice and it is only now that you remember how young she actually is. “He didn’t even get a proper burial. He saved the world once, you know?”

To be honest, you were never a big fan of Vision. Maybe it was the fact you were born in the 1920s and some technology just rubbed you the wrong way. But he was always one to fight alongside you. 

“See? I knew you did something”

“Ok, we’re getting a little off topic now” the agent crosses her arms.

Maria was definitely hoping you’d take her side. It’s interesting, how five years of being gone can throw people off their game so easily. They’re missing so much information, and so much context that there are blind spots everywhere.

“What’s the topic, then?” you ask, standing up and staying by Wanda’s side.

“Hayward is still on the run. We worry he might try to find you. He knows about this safe house and it isn’t that far from Westview, so…”

“We’ll move. I know a place that’s not on his radar”

“The android…”

“Vision?” you say, confused.

“No. There was… another one. Hayward built him. Used my magic to make him sentient” Wanda says, looking at her hands. 

“There’s a possibility that he comes back. And we don’t know if it’s friendly or not. Maybe Barton could help”

“I’m not on speaking terms with Barton” you cut her off. “If he’s willing to help, then he can take care of them while I go find Hayward”

“We’d rather you didn’t”

“Afraid I’m going to kill him?” you say with a smile.

“Well, yes”

“Yeah, he deserves it” you hold Maria’s stare. Yet another thing she doesn’t know about.

“That’s besides the point. FBI wants him locked up. If you kill him…”

“If they find out I killed him”

Like you haven’t done countless hits on behalf of the government, assassinations that were staged to look like perfect accidents. What’s one more? And against someone who actually deserves it.

“I don’t like where this is going” Wanda interrupts, looking up at you. You can see she’s shaken up, and that shuts you up real quick. “We’d rather stay with Y/N”

“Sleep on it” you say. “Barton knows you, he’s got kids that could play with yours. It may be safer to stay with them” 

Once again, Wanda stares at you, but you look away. Why would it be so hard for you to just drop her off at Barton’s and call it a day? Make it someone else’s problem.

But it’s not something you want to drop. If you can help, you’ll do it. 

“Sleep on it” you ask again, smiling. Wanda nods, standing up and Maria gets up. “Come on, Hill”

“You sure you’re not compromised? One pout and you were questioning your choices” she says on the way out.

“I’m sure”

“I told Fury, this could go wrong. You always had a soft spot for a beautiful woman with a sad story” she tries to joke, but you don’t laugh.

She's not exactly wrong.

In spite of everything, you trust Maria and Fury to do the right thing, though their methods can be questionable. You promise to be in contact as soon as you find a safe spot, and watch as she climbs in her motorcycle and drives away.

To your surprise, Wanda’s back in the kitchen, chewing on her thumb.

“You should get some rest”

“I don’t need to sleep on it. It would be better… I want us to stay with you. I’d feel safer”

“Ok” you nod, hiding your hands in the pockets of your jeans. You’re about to bring up the kiss when Wanda walks out of the room, wishing you goodnight.

It’s probably for the best.

—

The forest looks beautiful at break of dawn. The cool, clear night is followed by a misty morning, the first rays of sun trying to break through the heavy fog.

You didn’t sleep at all. The mention of Hayward left you restless. You know him and what he’s capable of doing. If he’s really after Wanda, better to not leave anything to luck. He won’t hurt her or her children. Not on your watch.

The bedroom is quiet, both kids glued to Wanda’s side. You kneel, admiring her sleeping figure for a moment. A strand of auburn hair covers her eyes, and you can’t resist the urge to push it back.

“Wanda” you say, hoping she won’t get scared. You almost want to laugh at the groan she lets out. “We have to move. Come on”

“Five more minutes”

“You can sleep in the car” you promise. Once she opens her eyes, Wanda looks around the room, rubbing the sleep off of them. Then, she focuses back on you, smiling.

“Hey”

“Hi, witchy”

“Don’t call me that”

You laugh at her readiness to fight, even when she just woke up. The kids stir in their sleep, and you stand up, carrying them all the way to the car, giving Wanda a chance to get cleaned up and changed.

She leaves the cabin a few minutes later, looking back.

“Food? Money?”

“I packed everything, don’t worry” you reassure her. You walk around the car to open the passenger door for her, and she can’t hide her smile when she walks past you, lingering a bit to stay close to you. You’re surprised to notice she falls asleep as soon as you start the car.

You drive for an hour, looking around for any cars following you. The road is empty, though. Still, you don’t relax until you choose a little battered road, the car swaying with each bump.

By the time you park close to a cliff, Wanda and the kids are awake.

“Where are we?” Tommy asks, and you smile at him.

“On an adventure” you wink. Opening the trunk of the car, you pull out four backpacks. They’re full of provisions, money, and in your case, weapons.

Each one takes their own bag, their plushie serving as an ID. Wanda laughs softly as she looks at the big purple axolotl, remembering how you insisted on getting it for her.

“Can we eat now?” Billy asks.

“Depends, do you get dizzy when you’re flying?”

“I’ve never flown before”

“I’d rather we save the trouble of throwing up in the small plane” you turn to Wanda. “But you decide”

“Have a small snack, kids”

You nod, pointing at the direction you have to take. It will only be five minutes until they find the aircraft. As they walk away, you turn to the car, pushing it over the cliff. It rolls down easily, and crashes against the bottom a minute later. It’s best to cover your tracks.

The kids stare in awe at the small plane, while you look for the keys under one of the wings. After opening the door, you stand by it, helping them up and waiting for Wanda to hoist her up by her waist. 

“Can you give us a little push?” you ask, referring to her magic. She nods, tendrils of red extending outside and moving the aircraft forward.

“You sure this thing will hold?” she asks and you nod, smiling at her.

“It’s just a short ride”

45 minutes at best, and you enjoy every second of it. It was one of your favorite things during missions and the team always knew you’d fly anywhere when the Quinjet was involved. Not only did you have a natural talent, but the feeling of being above everything, crossing the sky; that was very liberating for you.

It’s the perfect time to enjoy the view, too. The sun isn’t too high, and the mist is still lifting from the ground. You begin to let go of the tension of the past few days, recognising the path that will take you back to a safe space.

“Everything ok?” you turn to look at Billy and Tommy, and they nod, looking excitedly out the window, pointing at the mountains and the water of the river that glisten with the sunrays.

“You might wanna go back with them. It’s not gonna be the best landing” you warn Wanda and she goes to the backseat, casually drapping her hands around their shoulders. She wants to hold them, without raising any alarm bells about her sudden proximity. 

Truth be told, even if you are a little rusty, you touch ground almost perfectly, smiling at them when the dust settles.

“It’s going to be a bit of a walk from here, but we can take a break by the river and eat something” you say, the kids jumping out of the plane and going straight to running around the trees. “Need any help?”

“Yes, please” Wanda says, and you hold your hand out. Once she takes it, you pull her over your shoulder, making her yelp.

“Ass” she mutters when you put her down.

Except there’s no annoyance in her tone, not this time. You smile back, leading her around the path to a small clear. You hand over sandwiches and some chips, while Wanda’s backpack has water and juice boxes for the kids. For your part, you take out a flask, enjoying the taste of scotch.

“Must you really?” Wanda says and you shrug your shoulders. 

When the kids are done, they approach the edge of the lake, throwing rocks and playing with the water. You are leaning back on a log, watching them with a relaxed expression on your face. Between the warmth of the sun, the sound of the water running down the mountains and the fact you didn’t get any sleep, you’re dozzing off in the middle of the mountain. And then Wanda breaks the silence.

“Why aren’t you speaking to Clint?”

“He was one of the idiots that convinced Natasha to go on that god damn mission” after a beat you add. “If Stark wasn’t dead I’d kill him myself. Rogers’ too old now. That would be a bit of a dick move”

“Were you blipped as well?”

“Nope. After you escaped from the Raft I was captured and taken to a secret facility. They thought I was their best bet to get to you so they tried to brainwash me. Didn’t work. By the time they figured it out, they stuffed me in a cryo chamber. Rhodes found me by chance two years ago”

“So you did see Natasha. Before…”

“I was screwed up beyond repair. Angry at everyone. And she was ridden with guilt over failing the world. But yeah, on top of being pissed at everyone, I’m pissed at myself for not stopping her. Then she’d still be alive”

But I’d be gone. And I wouldn’t have Tommy and Billy.

Of course. You’d choose Natasha over Wanda. Was that even a question? And how stupid of her to think she could have a chance.

But when Wanda looks at you, you’re just staring straight ahead, not bothering to apologize or correct yourself.

You said it loud and clear, you’d be happier if Natasha didn’t bring her back. She misses your shocked expression when she stands up, walking to the kids and telling them to get ready for the rest of the road.

“Which way?” she says, ready to lead them. You point at the river. You have to follow it all the way down to where it turns into a lake, and then you’ll be closer to your destination.

Wanda nods and turns away from you, making sure her kids are right behind her.

You try to catch up, make small talk. But you kinda get the hint when she pushes a branch out of her way, only to drop it right into your face a second later.

So, she’s back to hating you.

The steep terrain gives way to more gentle slopes, the valley broadening as you make your way down. In spite of Wanda’s renewed dislike for you, you try to enjoy the view. It’s been a while since you’ve taken this road.

“Are we almost there?” Billy says, getting exhausted. 

“Yeah. Just 30 more minutes or so. Come on, climb on my back” you offer, and he’s happy to take you up on it. Tommy seems to be doing fine, running around with abandonment and testing the limits of his speed.

True to your word, a half an hour later you stop at the floodplain. 

“What now? Are we supposed to keep walking forever? Is that your great plan?” Wanda says, arms on her hips. 

“We’ll cross the river and then we’ll be almost there” you answer, trying to keep your cool.

Even if she’s being unreasonable, you really don’t want to go back to being at each other’s throats.

“How are we even supposed…?”

“Jesus, don’t you have magic, Maximoff?” you finally snap. 

“You’re right. Come, kids”

Sure enough, it takes a small amount of her power to help them cross, and she smiles as you stay on the other side, rolling your eyes. The current is a bit strong, but not enough to drag you. Water is freezing cold, and you try not to show how uncomfortable you feel when it gets to your knees.

Five minutes later, you’re on the other side, avoiding Wanda’s stare.

Maybe this is a really bad idea, but it’s too late to back down now. 

You pull a small boat from a hiding place, gesturing for them to get inside before you push it in the water. 

“We’ve never been on a boat before” Tommy says, excited at the idea of being surrounded by water. You smile at him, enjoying how the current is taking you back home, the wind steady and soft as you steer the boat through the path you know too well.

You prefer to fly, but sailing is a close second and you’ve managed to do both in one day. That’s a win in your book, no matter how bitchy Wanda gets.

A spalsh of water that goes straight to your face lets you know she heard that.

Idiot.

It takes you by surprise. Clear as day, her voice in your head. 

You turn around, considering if you should throw her overboard. With a sigh, you decide it would be too much trouble to take care of the boys alone.

“Home, sweet home” you say as you finally approach the small wooden pier, smiling at the familiar sight of the hill that leads you to a place you love.

“Where are we?” Billy says, following you out of the boat. Tommy watches as you tie the rope to keep it there, the small movement making it hard for Wanda to stand up and jump out.

Even if it would be really funny to see her fall, you decide to be the bigger person, reaching for her and carrying her out of the boat.

“I am doing fine”

“Sure, princess”

“Let go of me”

Once again, she moves the conversation to your mind.

Savage.

What does it take to shut that mouth of yours?, you think.

And then, unexpectedly, your mind goes to the filthiest place it can think of. The image of Wanda, on her knees, her mouth open as you sink your strap deep in her throat.

“Out of my head” you yell when Wanda gasps. 

“I hate you” Wanda mutters, trying to free herself from your grip, hoping you won’t notice how much she’s blushing right now.

The sudden movement makes the boat rock back and forth, and before you can react, you’re both falling into the water.

“See what you did!” 

“I was trying to help, you pushed me!”

“Shut up or I’m drowning you, Y/N” Wanda says, swimming to the shore.

You stay back, sinking underwater and letting out a scream. 

Wanda saw that.

Fucking god damn it.

—

As punishment, you take the coldest shower, banging your head against the bathroom tiles over and over again.

Where the fuck did that come from?

You know what, you don’t even want to know. Doesn’t matter. It’s been a while for you, you live alone… it doesn’t mean anything.

Nothing at all.

Whatever.

As you step out of your bathroom, and change into some comfortable clothes -and God, how good it feels to have your own stuff again, you look around the room. It feels as if it’s been longer, instead of a couple of days. But also, it’s been a while since you were on a mission.

If you could even call it that.

By the time you walk out of your bedroom and down the stairs, you catch sight of Wanda, examining the pictures on the wall.

Most of them are with Natasha, or other Avengers. She sees herself in one of them, and she remembers that mission. How Natasha almost died, and you practically ripped in half the man that tried to shoot her.

“Fun times” you comment, eyes landing on that same picture. Of course you remember. “Had a big argument that night, told Natasha it always felt like she was going out of her way to get herself killed”

“Weren’t we all? Taking too many risks. As if they had to prove something to the world” Wanda sighs.

“The world doesn’t give a shit about us, so I don’t see why…”

“I’m sorry” Wanda says suddenly, turning to look at you. “For your loss. I never got around… I never told you”

“I’m sorry for your loss too” you smile softly, looking at the rest of the pictures, avoiding her eyes. “They should have let you see him. At the very least”

“He doesn’t even have a grave”

“Hers is empty” you say, swallowing.

The only time you spoke to Clint, was to get him to tell you everything. How it happened. You punched him square in the face, called him a fucking coward and left.

That was that.

“Thought I saw some movement” a man says, knocking on the door.

Wanda jumps, but you place your hand in her waist, easing her nerves.

“Hey, Sykes. I was back sooner than I expected. How’d she do?”

“Let me feed her, that’s about it. She’s a stubborn one”

“Yeah, I have my share of those” you comment, sneaking a glance at Wanda. “Wanda, this is Sykes, my neighbor”

“Neighbor? I didn’t see another property in miles” Wanda comments, accepting his hand.

“Yeah, that’s right. Y/N here has a big land. Lets us use it for some crops, though. Least I can do is look after the horse and the pup when she’s gone. Speaking of which” he turns, whistling.

A black and white dog comes sprinting through the door, straight to your arms. 

“Hey, monster!”

“Puppy!” Tommy and Billy come back that very moment, and Riley is all too happy to play around them.

“See ya around, have a good one” Sykes says goodbye and you wave your hand, sighing happily.

“Wanna take a tour of the place? We can see the ducks by the pond”

Billy and Tommy cheer, and you turn to look at Wanda. She shakes her head no, claiming the journey was a little too exhuasting for her.

You nod, telling her to make herself at home, taking the kids around the very big farm.

Wanda’s tired, but also a bit restless. She never imagined you’d be living in a place like this. The house seems very old, but not worned down; the slightly different color of the painting told the story of recent renovations. Judging by the tools and materials in the shed, it was all done by you. 

There’s a large dining room, a living room and in the far corner of the first floor, a study. Wanda walks in, noticing that the walls are covered in books, some paintings and old pictures scattered around.

She opens a picture book, taken aback by the sight of you, at least fifty years ago. She notices how time passes for the people around you, wrinkles and grey hair appearing more frequently. But you’re the same. 

Was this your family home? And if so, what happened to the other people?

She must have spent more time than she thought inside the study, because you come back a while later, calling for her.

“Hey” you say, surprised to see her leaving the study.

“I shouldn’t have, I’m sorry”

“No, that’s fine. I’m just going to the grocery store, there’s nothing here. Need anything?”

“The usual, to cook us something”

“I was thinking I could prepare dinner tonight. If that’s fine by you” you say with a small smile.

“Right, you need to make it to taste it” 

“Just wanted to do something nice” you say.

Wanda nods, averting your gaze. Of course. She doesn’t mean to be rude, but you make it so hard to keep her distance.

One minute you’re offering to make dinner, the next you’re implying that you wish she was still gone.

You take her silence as your cue to leave, telling the kids to stay back with their mother.

“Riley will give you a run for your money, kids. I can never get her tired” you say, offering your dog’s favorite ball.

As you pull out of the driveway, you find that the sight of the two kids playing, while Wanda sits on the porch steps, laughing and calling out for them… it’s not unpleasant.

You told yourself you were done. Alone was better, alone meant no risks.

And now, you wonder.

Did you really mean it? 

[scary-grace]

blind date (shigaraki x reader)

After endless failed attempts to help Tomura up his game, his friends have settled on their last resort: A blind date. Even before you show up, it's not going well. No quirks AU, 2k words.

this was originally in the x reader lovers community, but I figured I'd release it into the wild as well!

Part 1 Part 2

Part 1

Tomura gets being a little late. “A little late” is practically his middle name. He waits until the last minute to do almost everything, and that means any complications mean he’s running behind. Hypocrisy pisses him off so much that he tries to avoid it all costs, so that means he has to put up with it without bitching when somebody else is a little late, too.

Except half an hour isn’t a just a little late for anything, let alone a blind date Tomura didn’t want to go on in the first place. He’s been waiting outside the bar you were supposed to meet at for half an hour, and he’s pissed.

“That’s it,” he says after the eighteenth time a woman his age has walked past and hasn’t been you, whatever the hell you look like. “I’m out of here.”

“Just a little longer, honey,” Magne says. She’s smiling, but she’s also got her arm around Tomura’s shoulders, and if she squeezes any harder, Tomura’s going to pop like a balloon. “She’ll be here.”

“No, she won’t.” Tomura crosses his arms over his chest, tucking his hands in so nothing will bite them. They’re on the waterfront, in the summer, and there are insects everywhere. Whose dumb idea was this? “You showed her a photo of me and she changed her mind.”

“It’s a blind date,” Magne says. Like Tomura’s supposed to know what that means. “She doesn’t know what you look like, either. That’s why you have to stay right here and keep wearing that baseball hat. Otherwise she won’t know it’s you.”

Tomura hates the hat. Right now he hates everything. “So she got here on time, saw me, and left. Can I go?”

Magne shakes her head. “You promised you’d try.”

“I showed up. I waited for fucking half an hour. I’ve tried.” Tomura finally shoves Magne’s arm off his shoulders. “I’m done.”

Tomura wishes he could say he didn’t know how he got here, except he does. One of his friends is getting married, and there’s supposed to be a wild bachelor weekend in Vegas, one last blast of stupid before settling down. Most of the groomsmen are planning to hook up with as many people as possible, and that’s where the problems start. According to his friends, Tomura has no game. Zero game. Negative one hundred game. If he was rolling for his game stat, it would be a critical failure – and none of his friends want to babysit him when they could be getting laid.

Tomura wouldn’t want to babysit when he could be getting laid, either. His solution was to skip the bachelor weekend and just show up for the wedding in his stupid rented suit. But apparently his friends really want him to come to the party, and they decided that what he needed was to get some practice in before the trip. Which means that for the last month, Tomura’s spent every Friday night and weekend getting dragged through his own personal hell.

They made him try dating apps, which were a disaster, even though Tomura let Toga set up his profile and make the first move. Then they tried traditional online dating, which also sucked, because Tomura’s too picky and other people have standards. Hanging out in bars and clubs worked exactly how it’s always worked – it doesn’t – and when Dabi pulled out the big guns and dragged Tomura to the sex club where he met his fiancé, the only people who talked to Tomura were guys. Tomura thought that was sort of a good sign, even though he’s not into men, until he remembered that guys will fuck anything with a hole in it. He’s not high on himself on his best day, but that was a really shitty night.

He thought they were going to quit after that, but his friends had one last ace up their sleeve – a blind date, Magne’s idea, which Toga enthusiastically signed off on when she saw a picture of the woman Magne wanted to set Tomura up with. Toga’s type and Tomura’s type line up, sort of, and Spinner giving the photo two thumbs way up sealed the deal.

It’s not like Tomura was hopeful or anything. He just wanted to get his friends off his back. Still, rejection sucks, and ghosting sucks worse. He’d rather have you show up and tell him to his face that you weren’t interested than stand him up.

Magne collars Tomura again, but her phone starts ringing at the same time, Toga’s contact info popping up. “Don’t go anywhere,” she warns Tomura as she raises the phone to her ear. “We’re here. She’s not here yet. Can you tell him –”

Tomura ducks out from under her arm and books it into the crowd of people on the waterfront, figuring he can make it to the metro stop before Magne figures out which way he’s going. But even that can’t go his way today, because he runs into somebody who’s moving at warp speed in the opposite direction, colliding at the shoulder hard enough to make him stagger. Tomura’s not confrontational, but it’s the wrong fucking day. “Can you watch where you’re going? It’s not like you matter to whoever you’re going to –”

“Are you Tomura?”

Tomura’s heart lurches. He stares hard at you as you right yourself, picking up the backpack you dropped in the collision. There’s no way this is happening. There’s no universe in which his blind date would be someone like you.

He can see right away why Toga and Spinner approved of you, but he thought you’d be someone in his league, not somebody who’s several kilometers above it. Maybe Tomura’s too excited that you actually showed up to evaluate what you actually look like. He looks away, then looks back. Nope – you’re still pretty, even though your face is flushed and you’re breathing hard like you’ve just been running. Did you run here to meet him? Only one way to find out. “I’m Tomura.”

“I’m so sorry,” you say. “My boss held me back at work, and I missed my train –”

You’re wearing some kind of work uniform. Scrubs, maybe. Are you a nurse? “And then I couldn’t decide whether to wait for another train or just run, so I ran – but I don’t really run, so it took even longer –”

Tomura doesn’t run, either. When he was doing the stupid online dating thing, he sorted out everybody who said more than one sentence about working out. You pause to suck down a breath, then keep talking. “I know everything I just said sounds like an excuse, and I know you’re leaving,” you say, “but I was hoping I could catch you so I could say I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to stand you up. I get it if you want to call it off.”

Before Tomura can answer or even think about what he’s going to say, Magne bursts out of the crowd. “I told you not to run off,” she scolds, collaring Tomura again. “If you don’t stay put, there’s no way she’s going to – oh! You’re here!”

You nod. Magne looks you up and down. “I told you to dress cute,” she scolds. “And to get here on time. I practically had to chain him to a streetlight so he wouldn’t escape.”

“I’m sorry,” you say. “My boss –”

“Of course,” Magne says, scowling. “He’s never met a good time he doesn’t want to ruin.”

Magne knows who your boss is? “How do you to know each other?”

“She’s a pharmacy tech at the place I go to pick up my E,” Magne says. “She’s the only one who works there who isn’t an asshole, and her boss is the biggest asshole of them all. I only go in there when she’s on and he’s off. But let me introduce you the right way. Shigaraki, this is – ”

Tomura misses your name the first time Magne says it, catches it the second time, but it barely registers except as something he probably shouldn’t forget. You’re pretty. You’re not an asshole, or at least you’re the same kind of asshole as Magne and everybody else Magne’s friends with, including Tomura. Your boss is the wrong kind of asshole, which means you probably didn’t blow Tomura off on purpose. And you ran here so you could meet him even when you knew you were really late. You must have really wanted to meet Tomura. What did Magne tell you about him?

Tomura can ask you about that later. “So?” Magne is saying expectantly. “Can I leave you two alone, or are you going to run away again?”

“No,” Tomura says. “You can go.”

You look surprised. “Um –”

“Now.”

Magne cackles. She snatches the hat off Tomura’s head, ruffles his hair, and slaps him on the back hard enough that he staggers. “Have fun! I want all the details later!”

“Sure,” you say, bewildered, as she kisses you on the cheek. Tomura’s going to have to talk to you about that – any details you share with Magne will be fair game for the rest of Tomura’s friends, and he’s not sure how much he wants them to know. “Um, bye.”

Magne waves and vanishes into the crowd. Now it’s just you and Tomura standing on the sidewalk. You shuffle off to one side, out of the way, and Tomura follows you. “Are you sure you still want to do this?” you ask once you’re both leaning against the railing. “I get it if you’re not in the mood. When I’ve gotten stood up, I haven’t wanted to –”

“You’ve never been stood up in your life,” Tomura says, and your expression changes from confused to offended. “Look at you.”

You look down at yourself, then back up at him. “What does that mean?”

“I didn’t know anything about you and I got here on time. If I knew what you looked like beforehand I’d have been two hours early.” It sounded like a compliment in Tomura’s head, but he can’t tell if you’re taking it that way. “People like you don’t get stood up for dates.”

“I wish that were true,” you say. You look away. “I know how it feels. I get it if you don’t want to go out anymore.”

Tomura pretends he’s thinking about it. “How far did you run to get here?”

“Sixteen blocks.”

“You ran sixteen blocks to meet me. That cancels out being late,” Tomura says. You look up, surprised for a second or two before the relief kicks in. “I still want to go out.”

“Me, too,” you say. You smile at him. Women don’t usually smile at Tomura. People don’t usually smile at Tomura. He doesn’t know what to do with it. “Thanks, Tomura. For giving me a chance.”

“Yeah,” Tomura says. “What do we do now?”

“I don’t really know,” you admit. “It’s been a while since I went on a date.”

“Same,” Tomura says. ‘Never’ counts as a while in his book. “I don’t know – grab drinks or something?”

You nod. “Can we find somewhere to sit down for a second first? I don’t usually run that much, and I don’t want to pass out on you.”

“You can pass out on me if you want,” Tomura says. You blink. Tomura facepalms even though you’re looking right at him. “There are benches back there.”

The crowd on the sidewalk is only getting denser. Tomura doesn’t want to get separated from you, so he tells you to hold onto the back of his shirt. You grab his hand instead, and you’re still holding it when the two of you find a place to sit down. Still holding it once you’re both settled, searching for something to talk about. Tomura’s not optimistic about this. You’re too good to be true – the kind of woman who’d run sixteen blocks to meet him and hold his hand is a kind of woman who doesn’t exist. Even so, it’s – nice. Tomura laces his fingers with yours and decides to enjoy it while it lasts.

[iveneverbeenhere]

TW: suggestive bordering on smut‼️, hoshi is a himbo in this, degradation, specifically dumbification, sub‼️Hoshi, begging‼️‼️, no one actually gets naked but hoshi does try and undress you, he is whipped‼️‼️, hoshi just really wants you to treat him bad sometimes. Also he rubs himself on you like a dog

Genre: university au, established relationship, female reader x idol, no beta we die like men

A/N: woke up and needed hoshi to beg me to treat him bad. Lowkey a continuation of “the dumbest man meets the smartest woman” where they’re in an established relationship. Hoshi is a menace in this

Hoshi has never been the smartest, but he’s never minded; especially, now since he has you. To him, you’re the smartest, sexiest woman alive—which simultaneously makes him proud and turns him on significantly; he brags about you everywhere you go exclaiming with the widest grin:

“Look at my girlfriend! She’s just the best isn’t she?”

“Don’t you wish you had a girlfriend this smart.”

“She’s been on the Dean’s list for the last couple of years. No one could ever top my baby!”

Your humbleness causes you to wave off his praise with a simple “oh, it’s nothing, anyone could do it really.” Which Hoshi always gives a small pout to. He thinks you should be more confident. If he had your smarts, he’d never stop boasting. Nevertheless, he loves you for that humbleness and gentleness. You’re always patience; willing to explain everything and anything to him without so much as a frustrated sigh. You talk to him like an equal who needs a little help—not a child—which, he appreciates; although, sometimes he wishes you would be a bit meaner; like how you are with your cat.

“How’s my little dumb baby? Hm?”

“Awww, are you a little moron? Getting stuck in the cabinet, again? Do you have a little pea-brain?”

“Lil stupid boy hit his head, again. You’re too stupid to live, huh? You’re lucky I take care of you.”

Hoshi can’t help but feel his sweats tighten and his brain go a little fuzzy when you talk to your cat Einstein like that. You treat him like the dumbest little thing in the world; like he needs to be guided and save by your condescending hand. Hoshi borderline jealous that he gets to experience that side of you. A side that is almost cocky; a side that’s gentle, but with a catch. One that’s cruel, but tries to brush it away with sickly sweet tone. He can’t help but blurt out, ruddy cheeked and dry mouthed:

“God, please, talk to me like that.”

You freeze as your face heats up causing Einstein to fall out of your grip. You never know how to react when he says stuff like that.

He begs further with glossy eyes, “Cmon, baby please? Pretty please?”

Your ears turn red, “Hun, what are you talking about?”

He gets up from the couch and crawls slowly towards you. He kneels in front of you hitting your exposed stomach, rubbing his face near the waistband of your sweats as he pants.

“Tell me I’m stupid.”

You stand there open-mouthed as he continues.

“Tell me I’m just your dumb little baby. Tell me I’m a moron—fuck, I won’t be able to get enough—“

He starts to chew on the strings of your sweatpants, wanting to untie it with his teeth, but not wanting to go too far. You can feel the spit seeping onto waistband.

He pleads, “Call me stupid and tell me I’m only good cause I’m pretty and cute. Call me an idiot while you make it so I can’t walk.”

You can tell he’s slowly loosing it as he started to unravel the pretty knot you had in them in an attempt to get closer to your heat; you can feel him pointing and rubbing near your leg as he looks up with big, wobbly eyes.

“Please, baby?”

You can’t find it in yourself to refuse him.

Credit to dividers go to @k1ssyoursister

[steddieunderdogfics]

This week’s writer spotlight feature is:  @griefabyss69! GriefAbyss has 97 fics posted to AO3 in the Stranger Things fandom and 92 of them are in the Steddie tag!

Our anonymous nominator recommends the following works by GriefAbyss:

Quiet Nights

Still Motion

Vulture

Concrete Lovers

All Is Fine

"If you're looking for quality Steddie smut, Grief's profile is where it's at. There's such variety to the fics they write, that I feel like there's something for all tastes. If there's a very specific spicy tag you're looking for, they probably have a fic for that.Their phillia series is particularly delightful." -- anonymous

Below the cut, GriefAbyss answered some questions about their writing process and some of their recommended work!

Why do you write Steddie?

I write Steddie because we were given enough in canon to build a solid foundation of these characters—but not nearly enough to be satisfied. They’re also so easy to put into different situations, and in my case that usually means bondage! I think they’re both really interesting, well acted, and for me, they both ping that feeling you get when a character has a specific trait/experience/etc that you do. Also I really enjoy doing character explorations through sex and sex adjacent themes, especially BDSM/kink. What a character is or isn’t into can say a lot! More surface level; I like it when men are hot, especially with each other. :’ )

What’s your favorite trope to READ?

Is there a trope name for when two people are just messing around—wrestling or whatever—and accidentally get turned on and it becomes this push and pull thing where you know the embarrassment isn’t going to win out but the tension is still so good that you’re still like cheering from the stands when they start making out? Probably. I don’t know it though. That kind of thing is fantastic, especially if they’re rivals/enemies/etc.

What’s your favorite trope to WRITE?

Getting together, 100%. It’s the majority of what I write over all of my work no matter what type of writing it is! I also love to subvert the classic romance / sex / friendship scripts, so there’s a lot of buddyfucking and first kisses after sex (sorry to my LARP AU readers lmao). I’d say that kink discovery ties in with that well, because it’s rare for me to write a getting together story without sex, and it’s rare for me to write sex without getting kink involved.

What’s your favorite Steddie fic?

Here are three that are my faves, and I think might become other people’s new favorites! All three are very different, but they’re so well written and give you something really good—or interesting—to chew on. dog at the door by cchapsticck is hands down my FAVORITE, in the way that it’ll gut you so beautifully. I read it during a time where it was very cathartic (life is sad, gross, and dumb sometimes, to be suuuper reductive lmao), and I’m waiting for a good time to revisit it. Take the tags seriously, this is 100% a horror story. your dog or your bullet but i'm always a/stray by andwhatyousaid is another gorgeous fic with dog in the title that will gut you, but in a much kinder way. I also read this at a time where it hit me in a very cathartic way—this is more about the survival and growth after a certain kind of horror. Leomund's Lamentable Belaborment Makes It Hard To Graduate High School by perceived_nobility is the first fic I read that really nailed Eddie’s internal voice in my opinion! If you’re a fan of depictions of Eddie with ADHD, this is absolutely for you. It has a lot of details in it that feel so real to life too.

Is there a trope you’re excited to explore in a future work but haven’t yet?

It’s more of a genre, but erotic horror. I’ve been trying to sink my teeth into it but it still comes out either too erotic with little horror, or too horror with little eroticism. I have the vague plot ideas, but I don’t have the balance yet! Related (or not, who knows), I haven’t written sex pollen yet, which I think is strange because I love complicated sexual tension! I do have notes written down on how I want to go about it though, so it’ll be a part of my WIP city at some point.

What is your writing process like?

Sometimes I get a flash of something that would be hot or beautiful or interesting, and open a doc and start writing before it disappears. If I’m not at home I have to make do with writing down the gist of the idea on my phone which is... fine. I think I’ve lost some good ideas to just being at work and unable to do much with them when they’re right there in my fingers instead of gathering dust lost in the back of my mind. I do have an ideas document that is miles long at this point, though! And approx 65 WIPs. So I have plenty to work with. Other times I spend months and months daydreaming about something, examining the plot/themes/etc over and over from different POVs, until it eventually just comes out of me with little input. I have a WIP that comes to mind, where I got up one day and started writing and like three days later—I ate and slept I promise—I had 50K. That was in October, and now it’s a respectable 70K+, because life got in the way of my momentum, and I had other WIPs to finish sooner. When this happens it’s like I’m possessed by writing ghosts.

Do you have any writing quirks?

Mostly just an extreme pickiness about my writing environment! I need to be alone, have a specific word processor (if anybody knows of a Linux equivalent for microsoft WordPad, win7 edition, hit me up), headphones—usually with white noise AND music playing, and sweatpants on. Some of my friends get fully dressed to write at a desk, and I wear what’s basically pajamas to write while sitting on my couch :’ )

Do you prefer posting when you’ve finished writing or on a schedule? Oh my god I’ve learned my lesson with this one. For every fic I’ve written except for two of them, I fully finished writing and editing before posting them. I didn’t do that for one chaptered fic, and managed a decent update schedule, but with the second one… well, to the people who are waiting on a Vulture update, it’s coming soon! Thanks for your patience! It’s much easier for me to have a full fic to work off of, to change as I like, especially when it’s been a month since I’ve had the chance to even look at it. I think once Vulture’s done, I’m going back to strictly finishing before posting, though people have been very encouraging on it even though it’s not finished <3

Which fic are you most proud of?

I’m giving you two answers because I’m breaking the rules lmao 1. The first fic I ever finished and posted: Hell Patrol - It was kind of terrifying to share a piece of myself like that, especially in a fandom with so many people. I used to have a blog back in the day where I posted original art that got like no attention, which suited me well enough because attention seemed like a double edged sword at best—until this! So far 99.9999% of people have been nice. I’ve posted a lot, so I don’t really get nervous anymore, and I’ve gotten more comfortable writing what I want to. Mostly I get nervous about finding time to write everything I want to! 2. Silence Awakened - This was written for @steddiesmuttyseptember, and I really pushed both my ability to write under a tight deadline and my ability to turn something I thought was a very rough first draft into something I ended up liking a lot. I also had the idea for the gag sitting for a while, and was really happy to finally have a use for it! I’m not sure that I feel strongly proud of any of them over others, I think I’m just proud that I’ve finished things after a lifetime of struggling to finish any creative projects I started, and proud that my writing is—hopefully—getting better!

How did you get the idea for Quiet Nights?

This was another @steddiesmuttyseptember story! There were prompts: Soft and Slow, Backseat, Clothes On. Those really helped me get started, and I find it fun to write about public sex and also the idea of getting stuck on the side of the road with your hot best friend, so this was fairly easy to write. It was definitely one of those “I daydreamed about this for months and it fell out of me” fics. I also really like Steve’s car and need to write more about it :’ )

When writing Still Motion, what was something you didn’t expect?

This is the first fic I wrote where I felt like I was finally getting a handle on Steve’s voice, which was a nice surprise! I also had such a strong idea for the premise, but not for the ending, so figuring out how to carry that through but still having a satisfying end to the story was harder than I expected. I’m really glad I figured it out, though.

What inspired Vulture?

For anyone who’s read Vulture, this might sound weird, but trauma. It’s absolutely not 1:1 in the fic (and the story isn’t even really about trauma at all, despite the traumatized characters), but sometimes you gotta write about something through 100 filters and let that writing be a comfortable place to live in. Maybe some of the adjacent themes crept in, but it’s not really a puzzle or a mystery to solve—ultimately the story changed so much after the first few chapters that it isn’t really about that anymore. This is one of those WIPs that I come back to when I need some place where I can solve the problems that come up and it doesn’t even take anything away from me to do it. Also I wanted to explore a way more fun part of life, which is hearing an album so good you would eat it if it was possible, and then add in the sexual tension between Steve and Eddie, plus the vulnerable tension of their feelings.

What was your favorite part to write from Vulture?

I have a lot of favorite parts from this! It’s a pleasure to write, when I have the time to actually sit down and get to it. (Though I did write myself into a corner and had trouble fixing that, which halted progress on it, but I should be able to update it this month unless my life Gets In The Way <3) A few favorites are: 1. When Steve found out Eddie gave nobody else a copy of the tape. 2. The scene where Eddie’s sitting behind the counter at Family Video with Steve, severely sleep deprived, and the follow up scene where Eddie visits Steve at Family Video and brings him something. 3. The callback to the play wrestling scene in Chapter 1 in Chapter 8. That was a long time coming! Especially since I wrote Chapter 8 after a long break from working on this.

How do/did you feel writing Concrete Lovers?

This was a WIP I started almost a full year ago, because so many people were so nice about Acceptance and Negation, which is the first forniphilia/human furniture story I wrote. I wasn’t going to write more of A&N, so I started this one because not only did I want to revisit this kink very badly, but many people have said A&N opened them up to it. So this was written for the human furniture enjoyers, old and new! Including me. I felt great writing it, even though it sat at a dead end for months and months in my WIP folder. The fic I was writing for Dom Eddie week had turned into oh no they’re both switches, and so I decided this was a great chance to work on Concrete Lovers. I love this style of domming, especially from Eddie, who’s always so dramatic that writing him being so casual and playful about domming someone—even if he doesn’t know that’s what he’s doing—is really, really fun. And Steve, man. In A&N I was able to articulate something so fundamental to what I enjoy about enemies to lovers, and the beginnings of getting into a kink you had no idea you had, but I needed to get back inside of his head and go onto the next step. How does he feel when he trusts Eddie so much that he’ll just shrug and go with the flow, until he’s so at peace and horny that he realizes he’s breaking social rules—and Eddie is letting him? How will he feel afterwards as he struggles to get back to normal? They’re both not knowledgeable about BDSM in this fic on purpose, and so navigating the aftercare was a good exercise in not being too “by the book” about it. So all of that to say I had a lot of fun, especially once I got back into it. Even the idea of it—Steve standing there holding up the incense sticks—is so beautiful in my head, it’s very gorgeous and quiet. I’ve never seen incense holder done in any of my research—or “research”—for this kink, so it was satisfying to take it from my head and make it into something concrete. I’m very happy with this one!

What was the most difficult part of writing All Is Fine?

God. Finishing it. This one was so fun to write—right up until it was the most difficult thing to get through, and not for any particular reason! I’m glad I did it though. I think if I had been more committed to fleshing out the first parts before the sex, the rest of it would’ve been more satisfying to write to be honest.

Do you have a favorite scene and/or line from any of your fics?

The scene in Transcending Dualities where Eddie and Steve both dump their tapes out onto the floor to share music is one I love. I think Steve is a “I listen to everything including Rap and Country” kind of guy, so he had a few of the same tapes as Eddie, and the way Eddie figured that out was really funny :’ ) And the scene in Waves where Steve forces Eddie to keep his mouth open by holding his teeth apart with his fingers. It’s just hot, strange, and vulnerable! It’s one of those ideas that hit me in a flash that I had to write immediately.

Do you have any upcoming projects or fics you’d like to share/promote?

Like I said earlier, I hope to update Vulture this month! Other than that, I should have a steddiemicrofic this month, and I’m working on a sequel to Lingual Frenemies for Sub Eddie week in April. And a few other things that I might get done on time for the deadlines for corrodedcoffinfest’s May Mayhem and some steddiesportsau prompts! Also random WIPs I’m tapping away at that might get finished this month. No promises on an update to LARP AU before April but it’s been a while and I did some work on the next installment today. I have a lot of ambitions and very little writing time these days :' )

Outside of these questions, Is there anything YOU would like to add?

Thank you to everyone who runs this blog, it’s made my To Be Read list a million miles longer, and I’ve found some fics here that I really loved! Thank you to whoever nominated me, this made my week! It was such a pleasant surprise <3 Also, thank you to anyone who’s given me any encouragement, or feedback. It’s easy to feel like an outsider in a fandom (especially after not participating in one for many years), but I’ve met a lot of friendly people here <3  Lastly; get weirder with it!!!

Thank you to our author, @griefabyss69, and our nominator! See more of GriefAbyss's works featured on our page throughout the day!

Writer’s Spotlight is every Wednesday! Want to nominate an author? You can nominate them here!

[eightpackdiaz]

i have more of the kingdon college exes au! (this time from mel’s pov)

Mel’s first day of undergrad was really not extraordinary, not for the first half anyway. Until she decided to go to the library after class. She figured it would be one of the quieter places on campus, and after a day of lectures, and chatter, and bright fluorescent lights, she wanted to be in a quiet corner of the library to be able to center herself and get started on assignments.

Suddenly she sees someone standing right in-front of her, but not saying anything, so she makes herself look up, make eye contact even though she doesn’t want to, except, once she looks at him, at those eyes. she finds herself not wanting to look away. except, years of social cues conditioning kick in and she speaks,

“can i help you with something?” she hasn’t looked away from his face. she knows she’s staring but, this guys is objectively very good looking, that’s just a fact, she’s just observing a fact.

and then he asks to sit with her, she says yes, and they begin studying together. it’s nice, she thinks, he is a little fidgety but she’s used to it, really. becca and her both fidget sometimes so it’s not like it bothers her, and she tells him this when she notices him trying to stop himself. the look he gives her at that is one that she can’t quite understand, but does make her feel warm inside (later she will learn, that that look was awe, and that it will become a look frank sports very often when he’s around her)

he asks for her phone number, he wants to do this again. and she agrees, because she wants to make friends, and he’s been here a couple of years, and he wants to be a doctor too, so they should be friends. she’s excited about this.

very shortly, faster than she realized, and truly faster than she’s ever really thought, they become mel and frank. a package deal. he has his friends, and she also has her friends now, but they always seem to be around each other, including each other on their plans, and planning to be around each other.

mel isn’t dumb. mel knows what the feelings she’s been developing mean. and she also knows, because of the way she observes social cues. that the way frank is with her, he really isn’t with anyone else. he seeks her, he looks at her, and he always, always considers her. mel doesn’t know if he knows this, but he everytime he’s there, she feels…calm. comfortable. safe. which she does realize is crazy to say about someone you’ve known for two months, but it’s the truth.

they’re at frank’s place watching a movie one day when she decides that the best way to go about this, is simply to ask frank if her feelings are mutual. this is frank, so even if they aren’t, he won’t be weird about it. and it wont ruin their friendship.

and instead, before she can say anything, he asks her on a date. she’s been on two first dates before, neither of them were great, but also, neither of them were with frank.

being with him, is like, baking bread, she thinks almost deliriously. but baking bread has always calmed her down, she likes the process of mixing, kneading, rising, shaping, rising again, and then baking. it’s a process she uses to calm herself down, because she knows that no mater the variables, the will always like the result, and she thinks that no matter the variables in her relationship with frank, she will always like the result.

he is a gentleman through the whole thing, and really, this isn’t news to her, he’s always a gentleman. and every time she pointed this out to him, he just sort of shrugged and said something along the lines of “just for you”

he kisses her at the end of the night, he asks first, which she is really appreciative of, and when their lips meet she feels simultaneously like the floor slips out of her feet and like she is floating in the air. she decides that this is the best kiss she’s had in her life, and she also decides that she wants to do this, again, and again.

and they do, they go on more dates, they kiss, they study, they learn each other’s bodies, and they enjoy each other’s gasps. she had sex before she knew him, but she doesn’t think she ever made love until she was in bed with frank and they were looking into each other’s eyes and smiling.

they date for two years, which mel is very tempted to say were probably the best two years of her life.

and then reality comes crashing down, he’s going to med school in a different state, and that’s okay, they both have plans, and they might be similar, but they’re not the same, not yet anyway.

Their last might together was full of tears, and passion, and promises that they both knew were meant to be broken. After hours of memorizing each other’s bodies for one last time, they laid together and mel knew this was probably going to be the last time, ever, that he held her like this, so she was trying to keep herself awake. she wanted to memorize every point in their body that was touching, the curve of his ribs every time he inhaled, the tickle of his chest hair against her fingers. She knew she seemed asleep, and really, she almost was, her breathing regulated and her ability to keep still helped her unintentionally trick frank into thinking she was asleep, and really, she thought he was asleep too, until she felt him move his hand to her head.

she didn’t move, used to his touch and more into the sleeping world than here, she felt him take a really deep breath,

“you’re it for me, melissa king” a pause, and another deep breath. “i don’t know how, i don’t know when, but i will find you, and we will be together again, i’m never going to love anyone the way i love you” she could hear in his voice how the last sentence was said with tears in his eyes.

she didn’t react. she felt tears fill her eyes, but she didn’t react because she didn’t want to call him a liar. objectively, she knew he wasn’t lying, but she also knew that the possibilities of that happening were very low, so she took this moment, and put it in a delicate little box inside her heart. choosing to hold on to it, giving her hope in her darkest days, that maybe somehow, someday, they would meet again.

The next day, she forces herself to ask him to wait to be friends. She doesn’t want to. But it’s the best way for both of them to focus on what they want to do with their lives, she thinks, isn’t that the point of why this is happening?

She applies to med schools close to home, she thinks about him. She finishes undergrad, she thinks about him. She goes to med school in her home state to be near her family, she thinks about him.

And then her parents die. A car crash, both of her parents were DOA, and so was the drunk driver that hit them. And then she needs to deal with legal procedures, and become becca’s guardian, and the lawyers ask her if she’s sure because she’s on her first year of med school and this is going to be a lot, and she says yes, because this is her sister. And so she ends up not thinking about frank for a couple of years. too busy trying to survive with the weight of the world on her shoulders. but it’s a weight she bears gladly every time she gets to see her sister smile.

when she decided to move to pittsburgh, she knew, logically, that there was a high chance frank was still living there, he moved there to be with his mom, so there’s no reason for him to have moved away still. but pittsburgh is big, and it’s a city, and yeah he wanted to be a doctor, but there’s dozens of hospitals in pittsburgh, and it’s not like she doesn’t want to see him.

she knows, ever since the idea of moving to pittsburgh, and finding this facility for becca, a part of her, (the part that was under lock and key in that delicate box inside her heart), hoped that she might see frank again, she didn’t have any expectations, not really, because people change and life moves fast and she just thinks that maybe it would be nice to see him, even if in passing, even if only through the distance.

And now it’s her first day at PTMC, and she’s excited, she knows that this is where she will spend many years because that’s the plan, and because neither becca nor she like change, and the move was enough change for at least 6 years. She meets dr. robby, who is nice, if a little hard to interpret because mel can tell that his words have a lot of meaning behind them, she just will need to learn what it is.

she needs some help with a patient, and she’s walking towards dr. robby but then she sees him. him. frank. her frank. out of all the hospitals that are in this city. what were the odds for them to be in the same one. she stops walking. allows herself a moment for the feelings to flow, she’s learned is better to do that, just, gives herself a second. she can see years of longing and memories playing in her minds eye, and then she just. puts a pin on it. counts to 10, recites the three most common causes of infection and then approaches them.

she never really got quite used to how blue his eyes were, and being in the middle of an er with all this bright lights isn’t doing her any favours. she hasn’t been able to look away from his face, well she has, obviously, she’s working! but every time she has to look at him, all she can look at is his face. they’re working on the case, so they haven’t really acknowledged…anything, is there anything to acknowledge?

and just as she’s about to make a comment about the percentage of odds to be working in the same hospital, she sees it. and she didn’t mean to, really, wasn’t looking for it. but when he handed her the ipad back with his left hand for the first time in the day she saw it. a wedding band. a gold wedding band god they had talked about using golden wedding bands

she can tell that he noticed her eyes lingering on it, he always noticed things like that. she avoids eye contact and luckily is called away by dr. robby.

maybe she was wrong, maybe there isn’t anything to acknowledge.

[billythesimp]

Uhmmm... Billy and Lycaon with a Therian!reader who always nonchalantly (trying to be) fixes their hair/clothes!! I honestly think that's something cute and intimate between Therians and it's low-key a confession from reader

I cackled at the thought of a Thiren grooming and fixing up Billy. My man would both love and hate it.

Neat and Tidy

⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎…

I will apologize in advance if Von's part is longer then Billy's. After all, they are just headcanons but also I figured that Billy wouldn't know how to respond to such a thing as he's an android while Von himself is a thiren.

Also it is thiren or therian? I can never tell and I've seen both.

Billy / Lycaon x Thiren-gn!reader

𝑃𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑒 𝑤𝑎𝑖𝑡…⋙

tw: none

✦ With Billy, he only gets mildly annoyed when they are combing back his hair and closing up his jacket at times because of the ‘wind’. Though he does like that they are thinking about his appearance from time to time. He is a pretty good looking mech, he takes pride in his looks from time to time so if he found out his hair was unkempt and a bit messy, he would want someone to tell him for sure. But they were starting to become overbearing in his eyes that he would pout and whine whenever they would start tending to him in public.

✦ He jumps at their touch everytime, muttering quietly that they don’t always have to be babying him from time to time and that it’s a choice, but they don’t listen at times and don’t stop until he is presting and clean. Eventually he just brushed it off as a quirk of theirs despite the fact that no one else in their team got this similar treatment. It’s not until Nekomata told him something rather odd that made him rethink everything he’d known about them. At first he didn’t understand, what did she mean by how he was so lucky that he had someone who cared so much about him to groom him often?

✦ She thought he was joking at first, but it clicked that he was just dumb and really hadn’t noticed, so she held back on telling him so he would ask them himself. He can’t help but wonder what Neko meant by that, cue the therian mentioned before coming over and tsking at Billy before scolding him about his jackets collar and keeping his cuffs even. The more they go on, he can’t help but put two and two together and start to overheat from how cute they were being all this time.

✦ Since Lycaon was a thiren himself, he knows the mannerisms of his fellow kind. They vary depending on the species but they all fit under some umbrella of shared habits. That being said, he always gets a little flustered when they come up to him and mention that his red tissue is uneven in his pocket, reaching out to fixed it along with any little thing they can get their hands on. While he could have done it himself, a small part of him loves the thought of being doted on, and so lets them do as they please before thanking them. 

✦ They do this often, helping him fix himself up before making appearances or after a job well done, having rough housed a little leaving him a little messy. And Von isn’t one to own another being, so he returns the favor by smoothing out their skirts and shirts, finding an excuse to fix their cuffs to linger his hands over theirs. The way they grow flushed and thank him which only leaves him with a hint of excitement. If he could, he would take them into his office to properly groom them but he thinks that that would be too far. Move at your pace, he thinks, though if they offer to help fluff up his tail he wouldn’t refuse. 

✦ Of course, it isn’t unusual for either of them to fix up the other girls when needed. They are often thought of as the parent figures of Victorian Housekeeping, so seeing them get along well with their little preening sessions and cute moments of fixing each other's clothing. It leaves little to the imagination as Corwin and Ellen have at least spoken about when they would come out and announce that they’re dating. And while Lycaon spends more time with them and hears about this, he can’t deny his urge to ask them out and properly court them. But he wants to hear it from them first.

[boyfhee]

UNKISS ⋆ nrk

prompt · “you're so dumb” insert fond smile requested

g · bittersweet / fluff warnings · kissing, profanities wc · 0.9k

note · hi lily i hope u like this :< pls take care of urself, yeah? i luv u, and thanks to @flwrshee and @dokiyeom for beta reading + helping me with the ending. i asked both of them for advice and used neither's 😆☝️ go follow them

riki follows you closely behind as you rush down from the hallways to the middle of the football ground for some reason, anger spilling around with every step you take. “riki, what the fuck? what the actual fuck? how could y— why did you do that?” 

“relax, it was just a kiss,” and his voice is calm, like it’s just a kiss, just a moment where his lips touched yours, like it’s an everyday thing, as if you’re making a big deal out of it by making it sound like he just committed a crime. you don’t know why or how he’s so normal about this while you feel every nerve in your body go off with sirens. 

“my first kiss,” you turn around hastily, your index finger pointed at him as he takes a step back to avoid crashing into you. “it was my first kiss, riki, and you took it. you, and you’re not even my boyfriend,” 

is this supposed to be a secret? yes. are you in the middle of the football ground throwing a tantrum like a five year old, for the world to know? also yes, and you couldn’t care less, actually. the fact that riki took your first kiss easily tops your list of concerns at the moment. 

“i am,” he blinks, as if he’s stating a fact, hands on his waist like he’s making a completely valid point. “a fake one, but i am still your boyfriend,” you roll your eyes, scoffing at his oh so true words before shooting him a glare. 

“that doesn’t even make sense. i thought i made it clear when i said ‘no kissing,’ at the beginning of this fake dating thing,” there were three rules, actually— no kissing, none of you are allowed to go on dates with someone else, this is a secret which means, none of you are allowed to breathe a word about this to anyone, not even your best friends. 

“well, what do you expect me to do when your friends dare me to kiss you?” another factual information falls off his lips, it’s actually true this time. truth and dare with friends— never a good option, especially when you’re playing with your fake boyfriend and when your friends are spawns of the devil. 

“i don’t know, you should’ve made an excuse to not kiss me, or you could’ve pretended to kiss me, you know, since this is all about pretending,” right, all about pretending, from pretending to date, to pretending to like each other, fake smiles and fake words of affirmations, fake sweet nothings whispered and fake claims of being in love— it’s all about pretending and riki, he isn’t enjoying this little play at all.

he doesn’t like that every i love you that leaves his mouth manages to convince the world but you. he hates that at the end of the day, every second spent with him is simply tagged as ‘fake dating’ under the chapters named after him in your life. riki despises the fact that no matter how true his feelings are, in your eyes, they’re just an act pulled by him to convince people he doesn’t care about, and he hates himself for not being able to tell you how he actually feels. 

“eh, what’s done is done. besides, it can’t be that bad to kiss me,” so, he just picks up pieces of you from the smiles and hugs you give him here and there, hoping that there will be a day when you will actually consider turning whatever you two have into something more serious, something real.  

you feel your cheeks heat up at his words as you turn around to face away from him. truthfully, the kiss wasn’t half bad. it only lasted for a few seconds, but the ghost of his lips still lingers over yours as if you’re the home they’ve been looking for. you can still taste faint flavour of strawberry from the strawberry milk he had during the game. the moment replays at the back of your head like a movie, one that makes your heart beat relentlessly everytime you think about it. you don’t even know why your mind keeps travelling back to it every now and then. 

“whatever, ‘ki, first kisses are important to me,” you like the fact that he hasn’t noticed your flustered face, he likes the little name you’ve given him unknowingly. “i wish we could just…unkiss or something,” 

“that isn’t even a thing,” he chuckles, earning another glare from you in return. “you’re so dumb,” your words make no sense, but riki can feel himself smiling fondly at your stupid thoughts, his eyes fixed on you while yours are staring at the horizon with slight annoyance. what you said is baseless, but the next second, he’s actually considering it; to unkiss, if that’s even a thing— he can make it a thing, perhaps,

the next thing you know, riki is cupping your face to make you look at him, and before you could say something, his lips are on yours again, catching you by surprise as he pulls you a little closer. you swear your heart might’ve just skipped several beats, another second passes as you process the situation, and riki pulls away the very next moment. “there, i returned your first kiss back to you,” 

and all it took riki is a kiss to find his way to your head, and an unkiss to find his way to your heart.

[alisblackgf]

hello lovely, hope all's good! May I request Hobie period comfort? Reader's started their period and is NOT felling good at all. They're just nauseous, have a horrible headache, back pain, boob pain, cramps, a slight fever (I get period fevers), and the list goes on. And he's feeling real bad for lovely? He comforts her, makes her favorite snacks, reads aloud to her so that she can nap.

If you get to this, thanks a bunch!!

(honey anon)

YES YES SURE OF COUrse! (thanks for requesting honey anon i hope to see you more in the future!!)

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: hobie brown x afab!reader

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: fluff :)

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: hobie takes care of reader during their period!

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: writing about this man isn’t enough i need to inhale him (i didn’t know if you wanted headcanons or a fic so i did a little bit of both!) also i tried to write him in his accent but it is so HARD and it looks kinda dumb so excuse that

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: the sickness section may trigger emetophobia (fear of vomit), viewer discretion is advised!

𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐬

if you two just started dating, he’d ask you the basic questions.

such as: what size pads, favorite candies, what you want him to do, etc.

but as time goes on, he’s on top of everything.

he remembers all of your preferences and favorites.

he’s fine with you being grumpy, he has a lot of patience for you and will do whatever you need him to.

“go away, hobie,” you groan.

“sorry, love, ‘m not goin’ anywhere.”

“my insides feel like they’re collapsing,” you complain, hugging your stomach and curling into fetal position.

“i know, doll. li’l ol’ hobie’s here to fetch whatever your heart desires.”

“li’l ol’ hobie?” you laugh, forgetting your grumpiness for a second, which makes him smile.

he did mean what he said, though. he will get you anything.

if you like being read to sleep, he’ll get an assortment of books that you like.

he’ll read them to you at your very request! just say the words.

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐧

if you’re experiencing pain, just tell him where and he’ll massage the area for you.

if your chest is too tender to massage, he’ll just cuddle you and rub circles into your back.

however, if your pain is intense, he’ll go out and grab you some pain killers.

he’ll even buy you a heating pad should you need it (you probably do).

“(y/n), ‘m back. got you some stuff, too.”

“really?”

“yeah, got you some ibuprofen and a heatin’ pad.”

he loves taking care of you and he loves that you let him.

he’ll probably even say some stupid jokes to make you laugh (and they’re probably not funny).

his reasoning is “laughter is the best medicine”.

if you don’t laugh, though, he’ll tickle you.

so laugh.

𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬

if you get fevers, he’ll wet a rag with cold water, fold it, and put it on your forehead.

he gets you fever medication, mainly tylenol because he assumes you wouldn’t like the taste of the liquid medicine.

if you feel nauseous, he’s there rubbing your back and comforting you.

he tells you to let him know if you’re going to vomit so he can accompany you.

if you do end up vomiting, though, he’s right there with you.

if you have long/medium-length hair, he holds your hair back as you do your business into the toilet.

if you have short hair, he rubs your back.

whatever length hair you may have, he praises you.

“there you go, dove, let it all out,” he coos.

when you’re done, he gives you a cup of water.

𝐛𝐨𝐧𝐮𝐬!

it’s nighttime, and hobie was urging you to sleep. even though your body was practically wrapped around him (which was usually all you needed to fall asleep), the pain kept you awake. you were already facing him, looking over the features you adored so much. he was resting peacefully, you really didn’t want to wake him up, but you really couldn’t sleep.

“hobie?” you asked, attempting to wake him up.

“mm, yeah, love?” he mumbled, half-awake. he was so cute you could almost laugh.

“sorry to wake you, but could you read me to sleep?”

“mhm,” he responds. “gimme a sec.”

his willingness to do what you asked without questioning it made butterflies swarm in your stomach. he groggily got up to go retrieve a book.

“want anythin’ in particular?” he asks you.

“no, surprise me.”

he nods and picks one out.

he sits down on the edge of the bed as you get snuggled back under the covers. as he begins to read, you find yourself more relaxed than ever. hobie must’ve loved you to death with the way he was caring for you, so you made sure to let him know you felt the same.

“i love you, hobie.”

he stopped reading and looked at you. your eyes were already closed and your breathing steady. he smiled at your resting figure.

“i love you too.”

UGH i love him

tags: @pr0wlerpunk

[thatnonameuser]

I like how Winston is rightfully pissed at MC. Her horrible naivety, the dumb hopeful behavior really fucking both their lives up, sad. MC still believes that she can change things to morph her perspective and ideals (ie. Save lives and escape or talk things through) which makes everything much more easier for the others to twist and manipulate. She's still playing by her own rules;; That's why I believe she's losing. That and major disadvantage when facing all these magically equipped yandere, 100% the worse place to be a darling ngl. If Riddle can fix your injuries with a swoosh of a hand, who's to say he's not afraid of you getting hurt so you can learn your lesson? If Chenya can hold you and follow you any time with his UM, who can say whether or not he's always there.

I can't wait for her to succumb to the world and realize, she's going to have to rewire herself if she doesn't want to be "just a darling". The only people hellbent on helping her are those in her dreams.. which gives me an idea. How will we escape? The key to escaping seems to have been broken but.. Winston's wedding ring seems to still have remnants of it. Will the other darlings have one too? Will we need those to escape? Are they hidden somewhere in the school? Just what ifs scenarios

He has every reason to be angry with her. If she never appeared his last strand of sanity wouldn’t have snapped and the only real, working exit he had would still be usable.

Winston sees her as a hallucination, a cruel voice promising him freedom that made his life worse (sort of like the Cheshire Cat in Winston’s recollection) while she ‘tried’ to help him, her decisions tore what was left of him to shreds. Winston’s madness isn’t just directed at her for putting him in this situation, it’s also at himself for perpetuating his suffering by rebelling against his wife. His mind was already in tatters, MC and Alice were just the final straw. 

You can’t completely fault her for being naive, she’s still not completely used to this world yet. A few days isn’t enough to completely rewire herself to adapt to her new, crappy and extremely disadvantaged situation, and she needs to learn and experience things to adapt to them. In later chapters, she’ll go very far to protect herself, stumble a few times and screw up even more, and maybe threaten her own life in the process, but she’s going to learn. Besides, she made one smart decision, learning how far they’re willing to go and willing to lie, is a decent first base for her on her path to fighting back.

For MC, Winston is a lesson in not being naive. He was naive, look where that got him once he opened his eyes. Should she try to bury her doubts with the idea of, ‘I just have to talk my way out of this, be cautious and I'll be fine.’ she’ll end up the same way he did. Miserable and terrified. Later on, she’ll grow to be less empathic and more distrusting, and how to manipulate her situation to her advantage. (She’s still going to suffer though)

Now for the part of her, finding a way back….. I’m waiting for TWST to tell me how the hell that’s going to work. I don’t want to write a way out yet because TWST still needs to confirm some things for me, but since there is one more Earthling Darling she’s yet to meet, maybe I’ll figure it out. Mostly since I have my own idea of how Book 8 is going to go, I want to see what happens first before I make the story’s way out.

Huge downside about the ring though, unfortunately, is that what remains of it is locked away in the Queendom of Roses, where only the royal family can access it. So unless MC goes heisting she’s not going to be able to get it. 

One little thing though, MC's presence won't have as big of an affect on all the OG stories. For this one she's a participant, for a few others she's mostly an observer with the ability to communicate with the other darlings.

[callme-holly]

Can you do Tim’s reaction when someone flirts with his girl? Like does he send his gang after the I’m just really curious what your take would be on it :)

𝐣𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐭𝐢𝐦 𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐝 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬

a/n: not me writing an entire thing on him being protective because im dumb and read it wrong. IM SO SORRY

Tim can get pretty possessive over you, and sometimes it can get a little overbearing.

If someone flirts with you, he’s standing very close by, making it very clear who you belong to. Nobody gets to sweet talk you but him

He’s probably  a little insecure. He knows he isn’t perfect, and if he sees someone who is 10x better for you, he might get a little upset or self-concious, though he’ll never say it out loud.

He’s a pretty rough guy, and he’s involved in a lot of dangerous things, which means he’s also involved with a lot of dangerous people. That might put a bit of a target on your back, but he does everything he can to make sure nobody lays a hand on you.

If he hears someone talking about you or if there’s even a hint of a threat towards you, he will lose his shit and make sure they don’t act on their word.

He tries his best to shield you from the rougher side of his life, not wanting you to be present in anything that could hurt you. 

His gang is looking out for you all the time, and Tim always makes sure you’re never entirely alone. You’re going on a walk? Convenient, someone from his outfit is also going that way? School? He can get that Pony kid to look out for you. 

He will start fighting for you, and he’s all about defending your honour. It can get a bit worrying at times, especially when he’s willing to get his skull bashed in, but you can’t ever tell him no. 

If someone ever hurts you, he’s sending the entire gang to go rough them up and show them who they’re messing with. You might not agree with it, and the majority of the time, he won’t even tell you what he’s done; he’ll just look after you and tell you, “They ain’t gonna mess with you no more.” 

[tgmsunmontue]

Wild fields of forget-me-nots - 12/? WIP

During the training for the mission Jake has an accident which results in him losing 10 years of memories.

A lot has happened in ten years. Bradley broke up with him. DADT was repealed. He got and air-to-air kill and a new callsign.

And he doesn't remember any of it.

ONE TWO THREE FOUR FIVE SIX SEVEN EIGHT NINE TEN ELEVEN

PART TWELVE

                Javy isn’t sure if Jake understands just how badly Bradshaw fucked him up, but he also doesn’t want to throw his toolbox of spanners into whatever this new thing is they have. Bradshaw is looking at Jake like he’s his sun, moon and stars and it reminds him of how Bradshaw used to look at Jake. Clearly the feelings never stopped and he just got better at hiding what he was feeling. He’s going to be cautious as fuck though, because Jake surely isn’t going to be.

                However, Jake has given him a handful of letters to read, and he turns them over in his hands. He hasn’t read them yet; they’re addressed to Jake, dated years ago, but he doesn’t know how Bradshaw will feel if he finds out that he’s read them. He snorts then, decides he doesn’t fucking care how Bradshaw feels, he’s Jake’s best friend, and Jake wants him to read them. And it’s not like he doesn’t have the time right now, Jake in Bradshaw’s room and probably holding his fucking hand or something equally sappy. Of course, he’s only just opened the first one, the oldest, when someone drops into the seat beside him, and he looks to the side; jerks his head in greeting as Trace makes herself comfortable.

                “Coyote.”

                “Phoenix…”

                “You okay?”

                “Yeah. Course. Just…” he waves a hand in the vague direction of Bradshaw’s hospital room. “Dealing.” He’s Jake’s ride, and potentially Bradshaw’s as well although now Phoenix is here so maybe he’s off the hook. Although they’ll all be going back to Bradshaw’s place anyway, he can’t imagine Jake wanting to go anywhere else.

                “With…?”

                “Jake and Bradshaw being a couple again.”

                “Oh.”

                “Yeah. That pretty much sums it up. Jake gave me some letters to read…”

                “Are those… oh. They are…”

                “They’re what?”

                Phoenix’s face makes a complicated expression Javy isn’t quite sure how to parse.

                “I called them his therapy letters. Offloading his feelings and thoughts until he went and got some therapy. Not enough. But… some. He’s…” she pulls a face again and Javy isn’t a stranger to having a best friend who is also a bit of an idiot, or asshole, or both in the case of Bradshaw. “He gave them to you?”

                “No. Jake did. He’s read them all. There were… a lot. Apparently.”

                “Yeah. Hundreds. He’s…” she sighs then and scrubs at her face. “All he’s ever wanted is for Jake to be happy and he didn’t think he was the best person for that. But he’s…”

                Javy slaps the letters against his knee.

                “He called Jake a noose around his neck.”

                “More like his heart,” Trace mutters darkly and Javy’s eyes widen slightly, wonders if she’s been trying to get Bradshaw to get over Jake as much as he’s been trying to get Jake to get over Bradshaw.

                “So, we just, what, let them get back together?”

                “We don’t let them do anything. They’re adults. We just have to be there and pick up the pieces. But…”

                “But?” Javy prompts.

                “I don’t think Bradley believes that Jake deserves someone better than him now. He’s not as…”

                “Dumb?”

                She snorts then, shakes her head.

                “I wouldn’t go that far. But he’s matured. A little. He won’t just end things, not without talking about it. So, if there’s a fallout it should be less.”

                “We can only hope.”

                “We can hope that there isn’t a fallout at all.”

                “That’s pretty fucking optimistic. This is Jake and Bradshaw. They were ready to rip each other’s throats out two weeks ago.”

                “And yet they’ve been playing house and happily married… Any sign that Hangman’s memory has come back?”

                “Nope. And that’s fucking weird as well. Jake knows they broke up now. And that they aren’t married. But he’s… you remember right?”

                “Yeah.”

                Because it had been the four of them against the world, and they’d just been beginning to test the waters with each other for something more than friendship when Bradshaw went and imploded that as well. He’s never resented her though, although she’s been as staunchly loyal to Bradshaw as he has been to Jake. He glances up in time to see a doctor open the door to Bradshaw’s room, and then Jake is coming out, and he grins widely at both of them.

                “Hay Natasha…”

                “Oh… that is weird. Uh. Bag- Hang- Ser- Jake… good to see you.”

                “Huh. He got you in the breakup huh?”

                Javy feels Phoenix startle a little, and he knows better than to ask if Jake’s got his memory back, because he’s pretty sure he’ll be the first to know. But the fact that Jake knows now, that he and Bradshaw did break up and that being together would be a new thing… well. He glances at her and she’s nodding slowly.

                “He did…”

                “Ouch. We used to be tight.”

                “We all did.”

                “Huh. Well. I don’t remember us not being tight. So.”

                He watches as Jake hugs Phoenix, and he knows one of his eyebrows is so close to his hairline it probably looks like it’s trying to migrate. What the actual fuck? Yeah they used to be tight, but Jake wasn’t ever overly affectionate other than with Bradshaw when he thought no one was watching and even then it was still only in the safety of their own accommodations and behind closed doors.

                “Just… thank you for being there for him.”

                “Oh. Oh fuck. Yeah. Of course. Always.”

                Jake turns to him then, jerks his chin in the direction of the letters clasped in his hand.

                “Read them.”

…            …            …

                As he expected he ends up giving both Bradshaw and Jake a ride back to Bradshaw’s house. Before they leave the hospital Maverick comes and gives him a clap on the shoulder, tells him he’ll see him shortly and Javy has no idea if that’s a promise or threat. Jake is grinning at him though, and Bradshaw looks just as happy, if not also a little loopy on pain meds. When they get to Bradshaw’s little house he watches Jake move around with ease, clearly comfortable and at home there. Bradshaw is tired, and he lets Jake bully him into bed and Javy watches with amusement in the role reversal of about ten days ago. Then he’s alone with Jake in the kitchen and Jake is studying him, head tilted and eyes narrowed and Javy knows the expression well.

                “What?”

                “I’ve got to ask. Why did you lie?”

                “Why did I lie?” Javy asks, taken aback by the question.

                “You were the one there when I woke up… you think I couldn’t have handled it?”

                Javy scoffs at that, wonder’s if Jake can actually remember when he woke up, what he said, because even with all his memories all Javy remembers himself is Jake’s excitement about DADT being repealed… Oh. That’ll do as a starting point, because he’s going to be honest.

                “You were… you were so happy about the repeal. I was just glad to have you alive. Then all you wanted was Bradshaw and I didn’t want to be the one breaking your heart and telling you that you guys had broken up… So I made it his problem.”

                Saying it out loud makes him feel a little cowardly, but he wonders if Jake would have believed him if he had told him the truth then. Thought that maybe he was joking. He doesn’t need to go into how Bradshaw is really fucking weird about Jake. The fact that he’d rocked up with wedding rings and some of Jake’s old clothes had worked out, but also speaks to someone not completely okay.

                “Javy… did I ever get over him?”

                “Nope.”

                “Hmm. Yeah. Didn’t think so. He’s an idiot, but he’s my idiot.”

                “Definitely appears that way,” Javy agrees dryly.

…            …            …

                He takes the letters back to his assignment, opens a beer and decides he might as well read them. Bradshaw had seen them in his hand, met his eye and just nodded, so even if he had felt like it was an invasion of Bradshaw’s privacy somehow he feels like he now has his implicit permission to read them. So he does, settles down and opens the first one and starts. He finishes the first one, the oldest. Dated not even a week after Bradshaw dumped Jake so unceremoniously with no explanation. Now he’s got the other side of the story, knows why Jake had clung to Phoenix and thanked her for looking after him. Holy shit. How did they all miss the signs of whatever dark place Bradshaw had been dwelling?

                He reads the rest in quick succession, knows Jake has only passed on a selection, however that’s plenty to paint a picture that is crystal clear.

                Bradshaw has been grieving.

                Grieving Jake.

                Grieving his relationship with Jake.

                And now Bradshaw has him back.

                In a way so does Javy.

[z-eel]

i felt insane writing this. like we can talk about size kink and free use and maybe even a weird adjacent virginity kink but NOT that y’all are dating…. love them! also i should be back today i’ve been rotating narcissa in my mental microwave :(

he’s literally their toy but in the best way!

they’re living like boyfriends, they’re fucking like boyfriends, they go out like boyfriends and kiss on the sidewalk and hold hands in the bookstore and even are affectionate outside of the bubble of their apartment

sirius isn’t the over protective brother he once was, but still when regulus sits in remus’s lap and lays his head across james’s chest he has to ask what the fuck. out loud. and regulus just kind of… doesn’t answer. he’s more like oh and you don’t cuddle with them? okay. the rest of the night, sirius is staring at them out of the corner of his eye. it’s weird. he knew reg was staying here, he’s not that dumb, but the way james has an arm keeping regulus exactly in place while remus contentedly rubs his hip… it’s all bizarre.

meanwhile regulus cant stop thinking of all the things remus said they’d do if he stayed put tonight. he has to stay exactly where he is, no wiggling or grinding, and remus is finally gonna fuck him if he’s good. james even stretched him before everyone came over. not like it’ll still easily fit, but just to make the stretch for remus’s ridiculous huge cock easier. he’s not even paying attention to the movie, just thinking about remus and his stupid dick

sirius and peter try to linger but even james is too eager and tells them they need to turn in. regulus told him that remus has the biggest cock he’s ever seen, and james wants to see regulus squirm when he takes it. based on the way he took james for the first time, he’s going to be quite the sight

and remus… well, he is excited. he’s been listening to and watching james fuck regulus for weeks. james has told him every detail of how good regulus bottoms, but remus wanted to save it for a good opportunity. he wanted to test regulus, who’s been grinding in his lap every opportunity he gets. he’s just as sex crazed as he claims james and remus are, but he’s better at lying about it because he’s such a pillow princess. and regulus is a little manipulator. that too.

so remus has him on the bed in james’s lap, three fingers in him, kissing him while regulus can barely do anything but moan. remus, remus pleaseeee give me your cock, i’m too close already i want it so bad please please please i’m literally begging pleeeeeeaaaasssee

and then remus goes to push in and before he can even get his head fully in, regulus is whimpering wait wait it’s too big, remus no it’s-it’s too much. and remus goes to pull out but james runs his hand through regulus’s hair to calm him. he’s not too big darling, i’m sure you can take him. just calm down, deep breath, relax.

so regulus does, even if he’s a little scared because holy shit it feels even bigger than it looks which is already absolutely massive. so remus pushes in a little more and regulus has to keep deep breathing and he’s clawing into remus’s shoulders because fuck he’s being stretched so much and it feels so good even if it stings. maybe because it stings. maybe he likes the pain. hmmm what other kinds of pain would he like …

remus leans down and kisses him. reg, back here with me baby. are you feeling good? tell me

and regulus can barely speak, he’s so full, but he gets out that yes, he’s feeling so so good. and then remus pushes the last little bit in and regulus’s eyes roll back and he whines out fuck fuck so full, i thought you were done but fuck oh god remus

james is sitting over regulus grinning from ear to ear while remus is barely clinging to his sanity. so of course james goes remus you can fuck him already. he’ll be so good for you, i promise

-💫🐀

no because Remus would fuck into him, no restraint and Regulus has never taken Remus like this and it to much he crying because he come twice, and James is trying to pull out third one and Remus isn't done and he doesn't plan on being done anytime soon.

and James is just praising him for taking Remus so well because in the beginning it had taken James a while to get used to Remus but because the prep they did now Regulus got to be properly used by Remus , dont you just love that angel, dont you just love being used by Remus.

and Regulus can't even fucking answer because he came and Remus stopped and James stopped talking, and they're starting at him because he had a dry orgasm and fuck that so hot. and now Remus is practically bending him in half and fucking him to him fast while James is jerking himself off. Regulus is crying griping on to James' arm as he begging for a break, one break please, because he's shaking and oversensitive and he wishes he could just sleep but he's pretty sure his legs are a sleep because of how hard Remus was gripping on to him.

(i miss Cissa)

[unp0pularl0nerkid]

The Flowers Died On Monday

Short one shot off of the following prompt: the flowers died on monday.

I didnt know everything about you. In fact, the mystery was what drew me in. What made me want more. You were a rich adopted kid, who stayed to himself, showed up with bruises and cuts and wore clothes similar to street kids. You were educated .. yet just like me. I didnt go to school. In fact, when we met, you watched me pickpocket someone. I was hungry. I needed the money. I needed to survive. Gotham isn’t the city where you ask nicely and gain a roof over your head. You gave me a tip. “Try a distraction, next time. Twinkle Toes.” He chuckled. “Twinkle Toes?” I growled. “Because you’re not soft on your feet” he laughed. Who do you think you are? Making Jokes about me when you don’t even know my life. I tried to fight you, you let my punch connect. You weren’t phased and you sure as hell wasn’t angry. You…understood. You stopped by the grocery store, bought a whole bunch of food and brought it up to “my” apartment. If you could call it that. It was abandoned, don’t know why. Its gotham. It was actually really nice, aside from the broken windows, tattered wallpaper, busted pipes…etc. You didnt judge though. You simple set the food down and watched me eat. You asked me about myself and I told you very little. Orphan, check. Poor, check. Misfortunate, check. Dumb, check. All the usual boxes, checked. Somehow i’d fallen asleep. You had this sense of comfort within you. Like i had no reason to keep my guard up. When I woke up you were gone. But, I’d seen some wood, and other stuff scattered on the floor. I didn’t see you for the whole day, but at 1 am, you’d showed up. You looked slightly bruised and even tired. But you also had some things with you. A blanket, an air mattress, some school books. The little stuff. You used the wood to cover the windows, you’d got some tape and covered the leaks. You blew up the airmatress and made my “bed” and then you gave me a book and told me to read it, throughout the day, so im not bored. I felt like I was a true human being. I told you more about me. How I ran away from everyone because they all mistreated me. They didnt care for me. They hated me and they told me it. You told me about your past. How Bruce had taken you in because he saw some potential. How you think, Bruce would maybe see some potential in me. I shut it down immediately. That’s your thing. You have someone who cares for you and im not about to ruin it. Maybe you sensed that I was about to break? Whatever the case was, you switched the conversation. We kept it smaller, you asked me if I think batman and robin were heroes. I told you that I think they’re doing the right thing in their own way. I told you that it’s admirable to do something, knowing nobody knows your identity. Especially robin, he’s young and he’s brave enough to do all of this. It’s really amazing. You just simply shrugged and told me to go to sleep. That morning you’d came back except you had a man with you. His name was Bruce. Your Bruce. We had a short conversation and he told me to grab my things because im going to come with yall. I told him that I ruin everything I touch and I don’t want to be responsible for breaking up his family. He simply smiled and said that the manor was big enough for everyone. And he was right. It was huge, id never even seen anything like it. He showed me up to my room, which was decorated pretty plainly but it was a room nonetheless. Id taken a warm shower and got cozy in my bed. You’d came in with some flowers and put them on my desk by the window. You said that even though the room is dark, the flowers lighten it up. I laughed and said it was stupid, one thing doesn’t change everything. You said that I was wrong, that one small step is all that’s needed to change everything. Like if you wouldn’t have met me, then none of this would’ve happened. And you were right.

The flowers died on Monday. I’d gotten back from school and they were burnt to a crisp, leaves wilted like they were already preparing for their demise. You said that it’s okay and you’d get me some more later. But I was feeling like those flowers. Id been to school, and I didnt belong. I felt like the biggest outsider and even when I got back to the manor it felt like there was some huge secret I didnt know. But when I told you that, you said it was probably because I needed to get used to it but your eyes said that I was right. That i either didn’t belong or wasn’t apart of whatever secret there was. But never mind, we both went to sleep.

My heart cracked that Tuesday. It was that morning when I asked where you and Bruce were. Alfred said yall had gone on a trip and would be back soon, but something about the way he said it made me believe otherwise. Later that day, it was just Bruce who came back. I asked him where you were but he simply muttered that you’d left and went straight to his study. My heart cracked. It felt like you’d abandonment me. You did abandon me. You did all of this for me and you left me. I ruined your life and I will never get the chance to tell you that Im sorry. I felt almost numb, except for the stinging sensation in my chest. I knew this would happen but you gave me hope. Me and hope were never ones to get along. Our story more like mortal enemies but you bridged our gap and somehow you slipped through the crack and fell through. And it was all my fault.

My eyes cried that Wednesday. I was wondering through the night, and Id seen bruce. He looked upset so I wanted to sneak over and see what happened. You’d always said I wasn’t light on my feet. He just looked over and sighed. Like he was going through an inner battle and lost. He’d taken me down a dark room and when the lights turned on I realized that it was THE cave. The bat cave. Usually I would be excited but.. id seen the news lately. Batman and Robin were missing after the joker fight on Monday. And there’s been no news since. If Bruce is batman then.. I asked him if you were robin. He simply nodded his head. My eyes watered before I even got to speak next. I asked him where you were? What happened? Why won’t you come back? He told me that you were gone. That he’d been too late to save you. That there was nothing he could do. I wanted to tell him that it wasn’t his fault. That there’s risk with the jobs and no matter what i know he fought as hard as he could. But, I couldn’t speak. I tried to open my mouth, to even make a sound but it was gone. Silent tears flowed down my face like rivers and that is how we stood for what felt like forever. So it wasn’t my fault..but i still couldn’t protect him.

My hands bled that Thursday. Bruce told me, if I wanted to, that he would train me. I wouldn’t have to be “robin”, it could simply be self defense. I wanted revenge, I wanted to take down any evil out there. I told you, I didnt believe in heros and villains but I was wrong. Some people are destined to be evil and they must be taken down. Your soul was pure and you didnt deserve what happened. You were kind to a nobody like me..and this happened to you. I told Bruce that I didn’t want to be robin though. I wanted to be a canary. I wanted to have a separate meaning because I could never live up to your shoes. Because i wanted your memory to remain the same. So that Thursday, we were out all night. “Fighting” crime. I wanted everyone to remember my cape. I wanted you to.. wherever you were, to see it yourself.

My heart broke that Friday. Joker had released the video of what happened to you, that day. It was all over the news, it was everywhere. I couldn’t breathe, I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t sleep. I wanted to take away your pain, I wanted to switch roles. I wanted to be the one that died just so you could live the life that you were supposed to get. The life that it seems like i stole. Unfortunalty life doesn’t work that way. It’s a series of unfortunate events. And i wonder if i had just made yours worse?

My soul left that Saturday. You’d came back. But it wasn’t you, but I knew it was you. Everything I saw, was you, Jason Todd but my heart knew that you weren’t Jason Todd. You were Red Hood. That wasn’t just a new name, that was a new you. You barely even recognized me as we fought. You said twinkle toes but it sounded malicious. You weren’t the boy I’d fell in love with. You were a stranger, a vigilante. You were simply a person that life dug its claws into. You changed and once again you left me in the dust.

That Sunday I knew what I had to do. I felt like I was the ghost of you, like everywhere I went the ghost of you followed me and I was forever reminded that I can’t live up to your shoes. Like i was an outsider who would never fit in. I felt hollow, Id lost my best friend and basically gained a new identity. And then I saw you, and you glared at me. You hated me…and that was my biggest nightmare. Literally. So I knew what I had to do. Id been thinking about it for a while. I stood on top of the clock tower, watching the whole town. Watching the cars, and hearing the sirens, and seeing the moon at its brightest. In moments like this, there would be reminiscing. Thinking about the good times..but i didn’t have much. All i saw was you. And then I fell. It didnt go in slow mo like the movies said, it was very fast. I even regretted it near the end. Not because i wanted to change my mind but because I saw you. Not Red Hood, but my Jason Todd, you tried to save me. But I knew it was too late, it was something I had to do. Goodbye. My love.

Uhm yea that’s it..sorry i haven’t posted. Writers block and what not!! I wanted to add pictures but i’m not really sure what to add…

[mikkomacko]

Could you do a small blurb for him and I about jacks lil crush on Nico?? Do you think it would be super obvious to the reader or to Nico? Or both? Neither? Idk I’m looking for crumbs lol

Ok I didn’t have enough ideas for this to make it a full blurb haha but I can offer crumbs

It’s so obvious to reader from the moment she meets Jack, though she’s a little confused at first because they’re both so in love with each other but also not?

And to Nico, no Jack doesn’t look up to him, doesn’t want to be him. He just likes to piss him off, has fun pulling the typical middle child card and being a clown all the time. It’s just who he is.

At first, reader thinks Jack is just trying to play wing man and talk Nico up to her. Which was funny because Nico needs no advocates. His looks alone say enough.

But then she realizes he compliments Nico to the other guys too. Like always mentioning him, always talking about cool and calm he is, how steady

And Jack never says it to Nico’s face or in front of him. It’s like he wants it to be a secret between everyone else. He likes the love-hate relationship him and Nico have, likes that they’re always picking at each other and bickering. Like Jack doesn’t want Nico to know he actually looks up to him

One day she finally asks Timo, “so like is Jack in love with Nico? Or what’s the deal with them because it’s a little…ya know?”

“Know what?” Timo plays dumb because he just wants to see what she’ll actually say. He does in fact know.

“A little romance, enemies to lovers trope of them.”

Timo laughs at that, fully understanding what she means. “Yeah, Jack is just really affectionate and Nico isn’t I guess. Not openly so like they’re really close but their love language are not compatible at all so they just fight a lot.”

After that, she realizes it’s true. Nico has this insane over protective brother energy about Jack, one that makes him come off as too mean or too hard on Jack. And Jack’s way of showing admiration is through boyish teasing and jokes. He just wants attention, any way he can get it.

But it’s like they both know. Because Nico gets all fond and proud when she asks him about Jack, when he tells her about his brothers and how he’s basically following in Quinn’s footsteps but wants to make a path for Luke too. And Nico tells her-swears to her- that he’s going to make sure Luke ends up in Jersey with Jack. He’s insistent that they shouldn’t be separated.

And Jack loves Nico. He talks about him the way a little boy talks about superhero comics and their favorite athletes and their older brothers. Always compliments Nico clothes, tells him that he looks good, that he’s a heartbreaker.

Eventually, reader slowly points out to Nico how much he means to Jack. That the playful jealously jokes with her and teasing him about being handsome and funny aren’t just teasing, they’re how he actually feels. It’s just in more of a brotherly way, a way in that Jack does want to be like Nico.

Nico is lowkey caught off guard, but he does start to pay more attention to how he treats Jack, tries to act like more of a role model and teacher for him rather than a boss.

And as we all know, he does give him back his brother when he makes Luke a dev

[ordinaryschmuck]

What I Quickly Thought About What If...? Season Three

Salutations, random people of the internet who are already scrolling past this! I am an Ordinary Schmuck. I write stories and reviews and comics and cartoons.

You know, it’s a LITTLE crazy to me that What If…? is one of the most hated MCU shows…and yet not that crazy at all. I kind of get it, this is a show that’s basically dumb fun where the writers play with the heroes and villains in the MCU like they’re action figures. If you’re looking for interesting ideas and concepts, you’ll SOMETIMES get it like with Doctor Strange destroying his universe to save his true love or Hela trying to figure out who she is other than a Goddess of Death..but the majority of the time, you’ll just get Thor being a party dude, Nebula going full Bladerunner, and a big buff lady punching a demon wizard in the face with the power of infinity–I will keep saying that until it stops sounding awesome.

What If…? is not a show for everyone. You need to be in the right mindset and the right kind of person to enjoy a show like this. Dumb fun only works if it matches what YOU consider to be dumb fun. As for me, though? I loved it. I enjoyed the hell out of Season One, I found Season Two to be a HUGE improvement, and I really looked forward to Season Three. It’s just a shame, though, that Season Three is the FINAL season…which makes no sense to me.

What If…? is a concept that could go on for MULTIPLE seasons, at least EIGHT for sure. I get that maybe animation is expensive or maybe we’re wrapping up this multiverse shit next year so we can move onto the X-Men, but COME ON! You can’t make a show about showing all the different possibilities in infinity and then just say, “That’s it. We only get three seasons.” It also puts a lot of unnecessary pressure in these last eight episodes. If this is a final season, then these need to be the best, brightest, most EPIC final What Ifs in the SERIES. The question is…are they? Well, let’s run through them. Though, keep in mind, we ARE gonna have to talk about spoilers. I'll TRY to keep the big things secret, but what's considered big anymore on the internet. I could say two characters kiss (They don't in this) and that'll be enough to drive people up the wall. So, to keep things safe...

Spoilers Ahead.

What If…The Hulk Fought The Mech Avengers?: Alright, so we have Avengers fighting giant Hulks in giant mech suits. I would definitely say we’re off to a good start…if not for the fact that it has pacing problems out the wazoo.

Yeah, poor pacing has ALWAYS been What If’s…? main issue. The show was originally intended to have forty-minute episodes, but got shaved down so the MCU needed to fill their quota for Disney and the company’s shoddy streaming service. The writers never got used to that and, in episodes like this one, you can really feel it. I mean, this is an episode of MECH AVENGERS fighting GIANT HULKS. It should easily be epic, but there’s too much time fast-forwarding through the epicness so we can get to the next cool thing or the next heart-to-heart. The final fight as the team pulls a Voltron (RIP Netflix show) feels more like a montage instead of a big, epic battle, with most of the team practically being non-existent. I mean, this is the first time we’re seeing characters like Moon Knight and Shang-Chi since their debuts, and they do basically NOTHING. The most memorable thing Moon Knight does is press a button. THAT’S IT. The majority of the time isn’t on this team of Mech Avengers, but instead on Sam Wilson and Bruce Banner…Which, to be fair, is actually the part of the story I liked. The relationship these two have makes a lot of sense when you think on it and it really sells the tragedy of a character like Bruce far better than recent MCU entries have. But, just like everything else in this episode, we rush past this friendship. We’ve got great moments like Sam consulting Bruce about being The Hulk and that final heart-to-heart feels like it SHOULD mean something, but there wasn’t enough time to build up this relationship or to show how good it was for them. We’re constantly TOLD they were friends because the episode didn’t have enough time to SHOW us. I don’t know, this SHOULD have been a SMASH, but with so much going on and not enough time to let it flow naturally, it all feels more like an episode you can PASS.

What If…Agatha Went to Hollywood?: Huh. So, for the first time ever, the MCU is acknowledging certain stories I’d figured they’d sooner let audiences forget. For one, we have The Eternals, a movie not many people liked, myself included. On top of that, we have acknowledgment to Agent Carter Season Two of all things, taking the plotline of Howard Stark making movies and using it as the main crux of this story. It shouldn’t surprise me, these writers are CLEARLY Agent Carter fans given how they shoved Peggy Carter into the spotlight again, but it still amazes me that the MCU is FINALLY giving some form of nod to what is really an underrated series…In Season One. Season Two’s not as good.

Now, outside of those acknowledgements…I feel like this story is a LITTLE hindered by the fact that the writers of What If…? didn’t get a chance to know what would happen in Agatha All Along. The plot of this story is that Agatha’s trying to gain the power of a celestial, and knowing what her life was like in Agatha All Along and what she lost, it would be interesting to consider WHY she would want the powers of a god. There would have been such a fascinating angle to go with that, but because animation is a lengthy process and you can’t edit an episode to fit a story that wrapped up two months ago, there’s no way they could have fit in what happened THERE into HERE. They barely had time to explain what happened to the other Eternals, saying they were taken care of off screen so we can rush through parts of this story. Again.

That being said…I still had some fun with this one. Seeing Agatha ham it up was a lot more entertaining in animation than live-action, with animators looking like they’re having the time of their lives making her move around and have facial expressions like an over the top Disney villain. She may not be AS compelling of a character like she was in her own show (Which had NO right to be as good as it was), but again, the writers probably didn’t have enough time to factor that in. All the information they had was from WandaVision, and ran with it by making Agatha more of an outrageous villain than before. And her interactions with Kingo, the one of the few characters I kind of liked in The Eternals, was surprisingly enjoyable. It’s two egotistical immortals trying to outperform the other, with the chemistry shooting sparks through the roof. Not ROMANTIC chemistry, mind you. That “Not my type” line is just…hilarious. Regardless, they’re what makes this episode fun, taking elements from the weaker side of the MCU and creating a bigger story out of it. Would it have benefited if this season had more material to work with in regards to Agatha All Along? Most definitely, yes. But for what they had, it still shined bright.

What If…The Red Guardian Stopped The Winter Soldier?: I really want to like this one. I REALLY do. It’s the loud and boisterous Red Guardian teaming up with the quiet and professional Winter Soldier. There should be comedy GOLD with their interactions, and while there ARE…there’s not enough to make this episode more than “Okay.” The execution is really what holds it back, as David Harbour’s performance often makes the Red Guardian more ANNOYING than endearing a lot of the time, aside from a few bits with Bucky. Speaking of, it’s weird how Bucky isn’t…the same, cold killer he was in Winter Soldier and the opening of Civil War. There, he often acted robotically, matching the arm that Hydra and the Soviets gave him. Here though? He’s biting Alexi’s leg, quipping, and acting just as jovial as Alexi does sometimes. The only time it makes sense that he acts more human was when he flirts with a cashier and explains it away with him saying his “Deep-Cover Mode” activated. That’s not the BEST excuse, but it works enough. I get that this hypnotized assassin would have been hard to write around and explain why he’d team up with  Alexi, but I also feel like there would have been MORE comedic opportunity to have Alexi try and interact with someone who doesn’t talk much or barely acknowledges his presence. Treat it like a kid trying to befriend a killing machine, there’s comedic potential there. It’s definitely more digestible than Alexi being the one to break Bucky’s conditioning.

Yeah, that’s a thing that doesn’t sit right with me. You can argue it was the power of friendship that broke through to Bucky in Captain America: The Winter Soldier, but it’s not just that. It’s the POWERFUL friendship between Bucky and Steve that no time nor conditioning could have broken, making something kind of beautiful in a movie about spies and espionage. So to have a guy Bucky barely knew in a DAY AND A HALF to be the one to free him spits in the face of Bucky’s story, his relationship with Cap, and his entire character development. It’s what stops me from really ENJOYING this episode, as it takes leaps and bounds of logic that feel greater than any other What If. Especially since there’s a way to help that. You have this guy dressed up as a red version of Bucky’s best friend. You can find a way to write that into why he changed gradually, even if it means having Red Guardian SUBTLY act like Steve. Definitely better than how he USUALLY acts.

It really is the characterization that stops me from enjoying this episode. Alexi and Bucky feel more like they’re in a Lego parody instead of an alternate timeline in the MCU, and it holds back the enjoyment a LOT…That being said, there are SOME things that I do enjoy. While the characterization isn’t the best, there are the occasional fun and somewhat endearing moments the two share. It’s also kind of cool to see Bill Foster’s Goliath again as he chases after these two idiots across the country, and his interactions with Ranger Morales (Not THAT Morales…Maybe) are surprisingly adorable. Speaking of which, Ranger Morales might be the best character in this entire thing, with her being the only one who benefits from the screwball comedy because, you know, she’s a new character. She’s allowed to say she wrestled a bear with her bare hands or collected slot machine tokens in her hat because she’s not someone with far more interesting and compelling stories being ruined for a comedic episode. And, to this story’s credit, there IS something interesting and compelling as it reveals WHO gave up information that got the Starks killed. I’m not gonna give it away, but it’s a great detail that offers more lore than I could expect from a series that isn’t really canon but CAN offer plausible information that COULD be canon. And, yeah, it makes me enjoy a certain MCU villain a LITTLE bit more because of how despicable his actions are.

In the end, there are SOME good stuff that makes this a fun experience, but if you’re not a fan of the Red Guardian’s characterization or ESPECIALLY the Winter Soldier’s, then you’re going to likely wish someone wiped YOUR memory of this adventure.

What If…Howard the Duck Got Hitched?: Darcy laid an egg in this one…I wouldn’t expect crazier from an episode about Howard the gosh dang DUCK.

Despite all its flaws, What If…? really was the best way to adapt an insane character like Howard the Duck into the MCU. His wackadoodle adventures and storylines work fine in a comic universe where characters are allowed to get as silly as they want, but I feel like She-Hulk proves that MCU fans aren’t ready for goofy nonsense that suits the character. So to have him go on an occasional oddball adventure within a non-canon series, it works so that the writers can get as weird as they want with it. And holy shit-knuckles, do things get fuckin’ WEIRD.

Aside from Darcy laying a FUCKING EGG (How the hell is that even possible?), you have every powerful person in the universe chasing after the damn thing because it is, inexplicably, the most powerful thing in all of infinity and they all want it for different reasons. Dormamu’s cult wants it to host his body, SHIELD wants to keep it out of the hands of everyone, and the Grandmaster…just wants to eat the damn thing. Now, HOW is it possible that Howard and Darcy’s egg turned out to be the most powerful thing in existence? Fuck if I know, but it is BONKERS and I love it. It’s just so funny seeing all of the mightiest and most threatening beings in the MCU all chasing down an egg of all things. And I don’t know about you, but something about seeing the two most boring MCU villains slapping each other so they can get to it first is…It…It just tickles me, okay?

And I know I complained about characterization in the last episode, and that still applies…unless the story is about Howard the mother fucking DUCK. Characters can get as weird as they want because that’s just how things work with him. But even then, there’s some genuine heart there as Howard and Darcy try their best to be good parents for their precious little egg. I would never think that a story where Howard and Darcy start a family together could turn out so wholesome, but gosh dang it, these writers are really trying to sell it. Their personalities work off each other better than I could have imagined, with Howard being an angry but good-hearted doof while Darcy perfectly toes the line between being the only sane person there and just as insane as everyone else. It works far better than I thought it could, really endearing me to the comedy as I watch the insane lengths these two would go to protect their child. I wouldn’t expect an episode about Howard the Duck to be one of the best in the season, possibly the series, but I guess it’s true what they say. When you’re outta luck, go duck…Or someone says that. I don’t know.

What If…The Emergence Destroyed the Earth: Hey, look! An actual DARK episode of What If…?! Are you fuckers HAPPY NOW?!

I say that as if it’s not something I wanted either, but I will admit that I would love just a BIT more dramatic stories in this show. Strange Supreme’s origins and Ultron’s victory are the best episodes of the series for a reason, even if I still wildly enjoy the goofy antics we usually get. It allows the writers to tell a tragic ending to a universe while, occasionally, showing the true strengths of our heroes. Something about Black Widow and Hawkeye still trying to stop Ultron despite living in a dead world–A dead UNIVERSE–shows that you can kill anything and everything, but you can’t completely kill a hero’s spirit. Something similar happens in this episode, though going for a different tactic to tell this tragedy.

It opens right away with The Watcher telling us that this story doesn’t have a happy ending. So, with every tense situation Riri is in, it makes you think that THIS is the moment when the worst happens. Yet the episode does a good job at always giving just the TINIEST bit of hope, making you think that The Watcher might be wrong and that she could maybe save the day. Although, it may have played its hand a little TOO much that The Watcher might do a certain something, but even then it plays with expectations a little, making you wonder if he’ll even do what you expect him to. It’s a decent attempt at playing with emotions, all while fitting into this extra dark world.

Speaking of, this is definitely the most intriguing universe that The Watcher presented. The idea that life still exists despite the Earth cracking apart is such a cool sci-fi concept that works best in a superhero world. Science will likely call bullshit, but I for one love seeing this literally broken world, watching debris and parts of people’s old lives float around the Earth’s messed up gravity. Things get more interesting as we get to see who the big bad of this story is, and I’m pleasantly surprised to see that it’s Mysterio. I don’t hate him as a villain, but I wouldn’t have expected him of all characters to control what’s left of Earth. Yet the writers go all the way that they could with a concept like this, showing us a much darker version of this villain and going further with what his abilities are capable of. The episode does a good job of showing us how Mysterio’s illusions were capable of taking over the planet, and I applaud the attempt.

I also love how much this episode endears me to Riri Williams. I wasn’t a huge fan of Ironheart in Wakanda Forever, feeling like she was the weakest part of that excellent movie. Here, though, I’m starting to see how a character like her could be fun to watch. Her determination to try and fix what’s left of the world and to keep fighting back no matter what it might do to her is the right kind of motivation to make me enjoy ANY hero. It’s simple, but effective enough to know that Riri is capable of such inner strength. I will admit, though, that I don’t really care for her supporting cast. In this episode in particular, it really feels like the writers just picked random names out of a hat and just inserted those characters into the story. No one other than Riri feels like they’re meant to be there as none of their unique personalities are allowed to shine through like hers. You could have replaced them with anybody, and the effect would still feel more or less the same.

That being said, I still think this is a winner here. It’s the exact type of dark story that fans have been demanding, all with a little hope shining in that darkness. Maybe it’ll make fans happy, maybe it won’t, but nothing in What If...? rarely does. I had my fun, and I’ll continue to have it no matter what Twitter says.

What If…1872: An episode where Shang-Chi and Kate Bishop are local heroes in the wild west? Sure, why not. This show’s done weirder…In fact, it’s kind of why I have some objections with a part of The Watcher’s opening narration. “Think less of ‘What if’ and more ‘What the hell,’” has basically been this show’s motto for a while. This is just putting two heroes in a different time period without some nonsense with Captain America smacking a time stone. Meanwhile, two episodes ago, we had Darcy lay an egg. I think it’s safe to say that this isn’t the first time we said “What the Hell?”

With that said…this is another good one. And it’s easy to see why. It’s a wild west story featuring two characters that have NOT made that big of an appearance since their introductions. AGAIN. As someone who absolutely LOVES Shang-Chi’s movie, it’s actually nice to see him kicking ass like he used to while the animation is allowed to have him fight with crazier moves. And Kate Bishop was a lot more entertaining to me this time around, acting as a cold and stern markswoman with actual skills instead of the bubbling and awkward character like most of the Young Avengers the MCU portrayed. She felt more like a unique character, and a badass one at that. Even the villains are pretty awesome in this, with Sonny Burch being a great, twisted fuck and The Hood being an ominous mystery even if the twist became a BIT predictable.

Speaking of, I have…mixed feelings towards that twist. Because I do kind of like the tragedy and internal conflict that Shang-Chi faces when met with who The Hood is. It feels like a taste of what COULD happen in a Shang-Chi sequel, whenever the fucking hell that will happen. But, at the same time, the episode started off as if it was about tackling AmerIica’s dark history in how we abused the immigrant workers to make it the country that it is. I was SO ready to give the MCU brownie points for tackling subject matter that isn’t easy to discuss…and then immediately ripped those points away once it revealed that the culprit is an immigrant too. Now, it’s not a COMPLETE loss. There’s this implication that the twist character is under some kind of control from The Hood itself and we’ve still got white boy Sunny being all kinds of okay with the enslavement of Chinese immigrants. BUUUUUUUUUT I still feel like this is the MCU starting off with an interesting, dark story to tell but pulling back because…reasons. Believe it or not, that happens more times than you think

Regardless of my thoughts on the twist, though, I enjoyed this one enough. It’s a decent wild west story that finally utilizes characters that the MCU refuses to touch despite throwing so much money into bringing them into the spotlight IN THE FIRST PLACE! Here’s hoping to seeing more Shang-Chi and even Kate Bishop in the future…

What If…The Watcher Disappeared/What If…What If: Might as well lump these two together as they’re more of a two-parter than any other finale. Even the Ultron episode of the first season still felt more like its own thing even though it set up the first big crossover. Here, though, both episodes are definitely part of the same story, one that a buddy of mine actually predicted we’d get: “What If The Watcher Was Put On Trial?”

Through this final story, we learn more about The Watchers, especially the one we’ve been following throughout the series. We get more of an idea about their oath and WHY The Watcher would want to break it. My favorite part is that he doesn’t hate his role in the multiverse. He loves his job as a Watcher and he doesn’t resent his higher ups for trying to take the job away from him or kill him and the ones he loves. He only gained a new perspective of what it means to watch and wants to share the lessons he’s learned, with the crux of the conflict coming from the fact that the other Watchers believes he’s going too far in protecting “lesser beings.” Speaking of, I liked the group of “lesser beings” formed in this two-parter. Byrdie is a kind of fun little tinkerer, it was GREAT to see Kahhori again despite her being a little TOO quippy, Storm as the Goddess of Thunder was AWESOME, and, of course, the big buff lady named Captain Carter proved just why I love her so much. I mean, she took a Watcher and fuckin’ body-slammed him into the dirt over and over again. Why the FUCK should I hate someone that awesome?

Speaking of, I’m…torn about my feelings towards the final battle. On the one hand, it was VERY epic and my monkey brain clapped at all the punching, kicking, and laser blasts that happened. On the other hand, I feel like the strongest parts of both episodes where the slow, character moments. The Watcher defending himself, Captain Carter voicing how she feels out of place in the entire multiverse, and even ULTRON going through a sort of redemption that works far better than I could have expected. That last part is the most fascinating of all, as we get to see what happens when a machine completes its objective, but his human mind allows him to reevaluate everything and change because his universe was allowed to exist. I feel like, as awesome as the final battle is, it would have been a more fascinating finale if we got MORE of that from other beings in the multiverse. Like, maybe if we got others that The Watcher helped or interfered with coming to his trial, defending him or going against him in some way, bringing the whole series together in a close. BUT, at the same time, I get why they didn’t do that. If this is the final episode, you gotta end it with a bang. And a big flashy fight is PERFECT for the kind of show that this is…but it could have been flashier.

We went from the starring characters in every episode teaming up to fight Ultron, to Captain Carter and Kahhori fighting against the most powerful beings of the multiverse, to…a random assortment of heroes plus The Watcher fighting three other Watchers. If this is the series finale, then bring in EVERYBODY for this one, big epic showdown as they defend the being that gave them importance. Instead, we have four heroes with one of them being introduced in THIS two-parter. As cool as Storm is, we know NOTHING of her or how she got that hammer. She just…does so the finale can have that extra cool factor. Even though I feel like it was on the right track when it brought back Infinity Ultron to join the team. It’s actually BRILLIANT to find a way to bring the first big bad in the series and make him an ally…Only to kill him off within the first few minutes of the final episode. You see what I mean? There’s a good idea to tie this series all together into one epic finale and what they do is…good enough, but not perfect.

With that said, I still find this a fitting enough end. Captain Carter gets to go out swinging to protect those she cares for and for all of infinity, while The Watcher realizes he’s more than just a voice or a faceless narrator who observes the fragments of the multiverse. He’s Uatu, and he’s the protector of infinity to make grander universes to observe, with brief flashes of the multiverse him and the others saved to prove. And…it’s really too bad we won’t get to see any of those.

Were these the best stories What If…? had to offer? Well…Not really, no. Aside from maybe one or two, it is, admittedly, not the BEST the show could make. Or the best stories they could have possibly made. It’s still enjoyable, but, once again, I can see why it’s not best for everyone.

…IT IS NOT THE WORST MCU SHOW, HOLY SHIT! The amount of people who bitch and moan about how awful the show is…makes me question reality, I’ll say that much. I genuinely wonder if there’s something wrong with ME or there’s something wrong with THEM with how VENOMOUS they get towards this show, especially with Captain Carter. I mean…what is with the hatred towards Captain Carter? They’re acting like the writers are FORCING fans to like her when…people like me just like her. And you wanna know WHY I like her? In fact, you wanna know WHY I liked What If…? Especially in this season? Because the writers give more of a shit about these characters than the MCU does.

Villains are allowed to come back and be better threats than they were in the movies.

Tony Stark can go on an intergalactic adventure instead of fighting evil billionaires.

Hela can look into who she is beyond a goddess of death.

Riri Williams can be an actual hero instead of a side character that’s forced into a spin-off.

Howard the Duck can be an actual character.

And Peggy Carter? She’s not someone who has boys fighting over or for Steve Rogers to win as a trophy. She’s not carefully tip-toeing through situations and appealing to men for the sake of getting THEM to get shit done. She’s a big, buff, BADASS woman who will do whatever she wants and wins like a fuckin’ CHAMPION because she is CAPTAIN GOSH DANG PEGGY CARTER! I don’t give two shits if you think she’s an industry plant. Ninety-percent of the heroes you LOVE are industry plants. THE FUCKING AVENGERS WERE INDUSTRY PLANTS! It was a collection of superheroes that weren’t doing well on their own, so Marvel just lumped them all together into a team, labeling them as “Earth’s Mightiest Heroes.” AND YOU CALL THEM THAT TO THIS DAY! Just admit that it’s sexism that makes you hate her. You’re still annoying, but at least you’re honest about it.

Like What If…? or not, it’s at least USING these characters for more than what the MCU offered, especially the ones that the franchise refuses to touch because Kevin Fiege didn’t think ahead about how to use characters he spent millions to produce for the big and small screens. And I’m going to genuinely miss it for that reason alone. I had so much fun with this show because I got to see these characters I love go on more adventures they couldn’t in the main timeline. If it’s not your cup of tea, that’s fine. I can live with that. But don’t act like it’s a STAIN on the MCU when the MCU HAS GONE LOWER! It’s not the writers fault that they wanted to have fun instead of making YOUR fan fics come true. You want to see what happens if the other half got dusted? Write your own fan fic about it. Because if you don’t think What If…? has good writing, what makes you think it’ll deliver those high expectations to you. YOU are not the person this show is catering to. Deal with it.

As for me, I’ll miss this show. I genuinely will. It was fun while it lasted, but I guess fun can’t last forever. The only question now is…What’s next?