#it also has a snake living inside its bug behind

[veryfancyrat]

So, if you follow theme park news, you may have heard that Disney is going to be ripping out the classic ride Dinosaur from their Animal Kingdom park, and replacing it with an Indiana Jones ride, likely similar to those in Anaheim and Tokyo.

Sorry, Aladar, you're getting evicted.

It seems that most theme park fans would like to see a new Indy ride, but some are upset about losing the dinosaurs.

The thing is... I think you can have both! There are plenty of pulpy adventure stories about a lost world of dinosaurs. In fact, I figured out one way they could do it efficiently... it's what I would do if I were in charge of Imagineering, anyway. You'll recognize most of these effects from other rides (and even some which are just left in place from Dinosaur.) I give you...

Indiana Jones and the Hollow Earth!

The experience begins just like Indiana Jones and the Temple of the Forbidden Eye (the ride out in California): We wind our way through the elaborately-themed queue as it passes through a jungle and into the shade of ancient ruins.

On the cool stone walls, we see Peruvian carvings depicting an enormous cave, where giant humanoid figures offer gifts to much smaller supplicants. But as we go deeper into the ruins, the carvings also begin to depict fearsome reptilian monsters. We come across artifacts which seem to be much too large to be made by regular humans: five-foot-long sandals, for instance, or a cracked soup bowl big enough to sit in. (These could make for good photo ops!)

Eventually, we end up in the safety briefing room, where Sallah informs us (via pre-recorded video) that while Indiana Jones was exploring this temple, he found an entrance to a vast system of subterranean caverns, full of larger-than-life plants and animals, seemingly forgotten by time itself! They go so deep that the researchers have begun joking that the planet must actually be hollow inside. Last week, Indy went in deeper than anyone has gone before, seeking evidence of the Staff of Giants: An artifact that, according to local legend, was forged by the mythically large people who once lived in the caverns, and holds the power to tame the mightiest beast. Unfortunately, Indy never returned from his expedition. Sallah is sure he's fine... wherever he is! But if we should happen to see Indy on our *very safe* private jeep tour of the pre-explored parts of the "Hollow Earth," we'll help him out, won't we?

We board the jeeps, which pass into a carved stone hallway, the walls lit by unnaturally large fluorescent fungi. Freshly-painted signs point out the tour route.

Suddenly, the vehicle shakes violently, and and the floor seems to crumble under us! The lights blink out as we lurch downward--and then out into a large natural cavern, where Indy stands spotlighted on a rock. He tells us that the floor caved in, and now we're all trapped in the Hollow Earth. We need to find a way out, and fast... the wildlife is BIG down here!

We roll from cavern to cavern, menaced by various threats. Enormous glowing bugs jump on rocks, and drop down on us from the branches of ancient trees. A carnotaurus lunges from behind a bush, defending its kill. A huge snake--perhaps a Titanoboa--threatens to strike at the jeep. A giant human skeleton lies sprawled in a clearing, its boney fingers still clutching an ornate silver staff. Its tip seems to crackle with electricity. "It's the Staff of Giants!" we hear Indy yell.

But beasts are not the only threat. Through the trees, in a quiet moment, we see the glimmering of a vast ocean, overshadowed by roiling clouds. Before we can wonder at the impossibility of a storm underground, the clouds begin to flash with lightning. Suddenly, a lightning bolt strikes the cliff next to the jeep, and boulders above us teeter menacingly.

We careen deeper and deeper into the caverns, until finally we come face to face with the carnotaurus again. Indy is there too, waving the staff we saw earlier, trying desperately to scare the carnotaurus away from the jeep. Suddenly, just as all seems lost, a bolt of electricity arcs from the staff and strikes the carnotaurus right on the nose. It rears back and roars in pain as we barrel past it to freedom.

Triumphant music plays as we enter the final cavern, only to see... a whole tribe of giants, accompanied by their pet dinosaurs! Indy is handing the staff to one of them, who gratefully receives the lost weapon. Happy giant children offer up crates of silver jewelry and dinosaur eggs in reward. One last giant strikes the cavern wall with his own staff, and mystical energy swirls, causing a door to open and release you back into the loading area, safe at last. Over the jeep radio, Indy says, "The folks back home will NEVER believe this one!"

Then you exit into the gift shop, where you can buy plushies of the "baby dinosaurs" you received from the giants.

No stealing the merch!

So... what do YOU think is going to be the plot of the new Indiana Jones adventure? I want to see who can come the closest to what we actually get!

[larcenywrites]

do you think tony would ever want a pet? (cat/dog/fish etc.)

I really don’t think he would 😭 he didn’t grow up with animals, and is a little scared of them and uncomfortable, and he doesn’t want fur everywhere (and swears it’ll mess with his allergies) and also doesn’t want his floor and furniture scratched up. Oh but there are pets that wouldn’t do any of that! He doesn’t want his living room smelling like fish ☹️ or lizard poop ☹️

BUT

Obviously if you already have a pet… you can’t just leave it behind :((( and he knows that. He’s probably never been particularly close to it, or went out of his way to seek out your pet when he came over, but now he has to live with it. Every day. All day.

If it’s a dog, he might be a little apprehensive and nervous if it’s excitable and hyper, and therefore mostly ignores it tbh. If it’s calmer, and just kinda hangs out, Tony still won’t have much to do with it… but he’ll be less nervous. He definitely won’t want it on the bed… or the furniture… but it’s kinda hard if you already let it on the bed and the furniture 🥺 Tony and the dog definitely won’t see eye to eye in this case, and when you’re not home, Tony is absolutely trying to tell it to get down aaaaaand the dog just side eyes him and rolls over 😕😕😕 Tony could try to pick it up… but he’s never really touched it before either ☹️☹️☹️☹️ so as soon as he does… your dog probably gets very excited and starts rolling around which probably gets fur everywhere and also freaks him out 😩😩😩😩😩 So your dog wins… but eventually, when it’s sitting right at his feet because he’s making food… Tony can’t help but subtly drop a few pieces of carrot or steak 😌

If it’s a cat, he’s definitely only able to think about those claws, and those videos where sometimes cats just randomly attack people… but it seems to keep to itself pretty often! Which is nicer than a dog constantly pawing at him! Until the cat starts sitting closer and closer, and then one day is laying right next to his arm while he’s working. He’s a little nervous, but so far so good. He probably tenses a little when it rubs against him, and anytime it’s around furniture or scratching at its posts. And eventually it’ll probably crawl in his lap and decide to sleep there, and Tony is probably freaking out inside and just tries to ignore it at all costs… but eventually you’ll probably find him petting it a few times!

If it’s an exotic animal, he might be a little more relived because it’s mostly in its cage/tank! No fur! And he doesn’t have to touch it! Oh no- is it a bird? He’ll definitely get anxious when they fly around, and if it’s a big bird, he’ll definitely be afraid of it 🤧 idk if he’ll warm up to a bird, especially if it’s a loud one 😕

Is it a snake? He likes looking at it through the glass! But he definitely won’t hold it! And please feed it before you leave for a vacation, he really doesn’t want to touch dead rats 😫😫😫 Same with a lizard. It looks cool, but if you let it roam free when you clean the cage, Tony won’t be afraid, but he’l be incredibly scared of losing it! He’ll probably follow it around everywhere, or attach a balloon to it if it’s big enough! He might hold it, but as soon as it starts wiggling he’s handing it right back! He might be able to feed it, all he has to do is drop veggies through the top! But it’s kinda gross that you keep an cage of bugs in his house ☹️ and he has to look at them ☹️

If it’s rats/gerbils/hamsters… he probably won’t let you bring in more once they pass…. If it’s bugs or spiders…. Same thing.

Ferrets? Okay, actually, he’ll end up having a lot of fun with them! Until he can’t find a watch… or his bottle of vitamins… and then they’re all hoarded under the couch! He still likes them, but now he can’t leave things lying around that’s for sure!

If you just want fish, he can deal with it. As long as they won’t smell like, well, fish! In fact, he might have fun with the aquarium! Maybe make a cool aquarium in the wall, equipped with all sorts of lights and decor and live plants. It’ll be very pretty! And he might be pretty proud of it! But his downfall is that he may forget to feed them if you’re away. Well, JARVIS can remind him! Or DUM-E could do it… actually no, he might dump the whole bottle of food in…

If you have eventually have kids, there will definitely be a point when they keep asking him for a dog or a cat or even a pony. He really really doesn’t want to give in, and maybe up to this point there’s never been any animals, but it’s hard to say no to his boys 😞😞😞😞 he might not agree to a pony, but maybe a small dog? Well, when he takes the kids to an animal shelter to look at the puppies, of course that puppy that was supposed to only be around 15 pounds is still growing bigger and bigger everyday 🙂 but hey, his kids are having fun running around and are happy, and he doesn’t have to worry about feeding it because the kids are plenty eager to take care of it! But it’s still not allowed on the furniture 😒😒😒😒😒

[devihashi]

it was not enough for them to look like a quirky animal

they had to look fucking weirder

[lady-literature]

ayy, so ya’ll know that Miraculous/DC crossover I screamed about a while back? I found plot for it.

It is not quite finished yet, but it’s also so much longer than I originally planned on it being. (me: I’ll just write a fun little thing to get this out of my head!

me, 13k words later: oh no)

SO! Here’s a little sneak peak!

(or, find the finished product here!)

***

There is an unspoken rule, kept by any outsider who’s ever set foot in Gotham, that you should only ever visit the city once. Most find that visiting even once was already too much.

The most dangerous city on earth isn’t kind to its residents—much less strangers who don’t know how to watch their pockets or keep off the streets after dark. It’s gotten better, perhaps, in recent years since the Bat started lurking on rooftops, but that doesn’t mean the city is good.

Normal people stay as far from Gotham as they can get.

Marinette, (un)luckily, is far from normal.

***

The touring of Metropolis, New York City, and Gotham had been going well as far as Marinette was concerned, no matter what Chloé says to her about carelessness and naivety.

She’s glad her, Adrien and Chloé all decided to take this summer trip before they started University in the fall. It sucks that it was just the three of them, she wishes more of their friends could’ve tagged along but, alas, it wasn’t meant to be.

Kagami was in the middle of training season and couldn’t come. Luka was touring with his father, learning the tricks of the trade and other things. Nathaniel had already been commissioned to paint a mural downtown before they really finalized dates. Nino was in much the same boat as Nath, just with music and pitch meetings. Felix hated traveling and Alix was doing… something. Time travelling, probably. Or at least spending more time in the burrow.

Marinette was certainly starting to notice the way she’s begun talking about ancient history like she was actually there when she goes on rants now. Felix also probably noticed but Marinette’s also sure that he’s aiding and abetting her in exchange for insider information so…

She’ll probably have to deal with that later, unfortunately. But not today.

Their tour group was going to Amusement Mile later that afternoon, but had been given free roam until then. Marinette decided to spend the time up until lunch at the park near the meetup spot in Gotham Square and Chloé hadn’t complained or vetoed that idea so the trio happily camped out on the grass.

Marinette had returned to her sketch of Lady Gotham in between eating bites of her sandwich. She thinks she much preferred the style of it to New York City’s Lady Liberty. There was just something about the Statue of Justice that inspired her.

She’d been doodling about it since they left the marina yesterday. She also had plenty of pictures of the statue for inspiration later. There’s one she especially likes and thinks she might even print out to put up on her wall at home.

She’s playing with the idea of draping fabrics for formal wear designs like the roman togas both Lady statues seem to wear when a tennis ball rolls up and bumps into her leg. She has only enough time to move her sketchbook out of the way before a large dog bowls into her, tail wagging happily and barking up a storm.

“Oof!”

Adrien’s already halfway up the tree, startled out of his light doze by the barking and Chloé only daintily moved away from Marinette, leaving her to her fate. 

Pushing herself back up so she’s not crushed by what feels like one hundred pounds of dog, she comes face to snout with quite possibly the biggest dog she’s ever seen. From there, there was really only one choice of action Marinette could have followed.

“Oh! Well, aren’t you just the prettiest boy?” she tells the dog happily, reaching up to give him scratches. “Such a big boy! You nearly bowled me over, didn’t you?”

If it’s possible, the dog’s tail begins to wag even faster, enough that he accidentally overbalances himself and decides to roll with it, flopping onto his back and letting her rub his stomach. Marinette does so enthusiastically, her baby-talk to the dog devolving into broken not-words and the occasional exclamation of good boy! in both English and French.

The dog was a great dane, and had the softest coat of black fur she’s ever seen. There was a thick red collar around his throat, and Marinette stopped furiously rubbing his belly long enough to look at the silver tag attached to it.

“Titus, huh?” she says to the dog. “Such a strong name for such a distinguished boy, huh?”

“Oh god,” she hears Adrien groan from his spot still up in the tree. When she looks up, she finds him eyeing Titus with distrust, the absolute kitten. “I hope whoever his owner is, they’ve never read Shakespeare.”

Both her and Chloé blink at the strange non sequitur.

“Uh, why? Exactly?”

“Because they have shit taste in his plays if they do! Titus Andronicus is, like, Shakespeare’s worst play.”

Chloé glares up at him. “You’re such a nerd. Now stop being ridiculous and get down from there.”

“But, Chloé! It’s a dog.”

“Adrien Agreste!”

Marinette tunes out the two blondes as they devolve into sibling-like bickering. It’s a skill she’s had to learn and learn quickly with living in such close quarters with the pair for the last few weeks and also being friends with the pair for the past three years.

“Speaking of your owner, I wonder where they are?” She scratches under Titus’ chin thoughtfully. “Should we go look for them?”

Titus' head flops to the side, almost like he’s listening for something, before he’s clambering up onto his feet to tower over her. He’s almost twice as tall as she is sitting, which is just ridiculous. Why is everything in America so big?

Getting to her feet herself, Titus still stands almost as tall as her. She can rest her elbow on his back when she grabs his collar to make sure he doesn’t run off. He leads mostly, pulling her along at a steady trot she has to jog to keep up with.

He truly was such a well behaved dog and certainly lived up to his breed’s reputation as a gentle giant.

Or at least she thought so, until the call of “Titus! Here!” echoes through the park and he goes racing off towards it, dragging Marinette along for the ride no matter how much she tries to slow down.

Titus comes to a skidding stop, and Marinette barely stops herself from falling by keeping her arm around Titus.

“And who are you?”

Looking up, she finds a young man, probably around her age, staring down at her. He does not look happy—but most Gothamites don’t, Marinette’s found. He’s also, despite the almost glare he’s giving her, very attractive.

When she opens her mouth, incoherent French comes tumbling out, much to her embarrassment.

Ah. ‘Not being able to speak coherently to people she finds attractive’, she had wondered where that particular personality trait had been as of late. Even after so many years hanging around people who should be—and are—super models, she still acts like a spaz. Why is she like this?

The man raises an eyebrow at her, looking very unamused.

She tries again. “Ah- Je suis- I mean, I am very sorry. Your dog found me sitting over there with my friends and I figured I should find his owner instead of letting him just wander around and I assume your his owner because if you aren’t this is very embarrassing for me. Not that it wasn’t embarrassing before but, oh, I’m definitely rambling and I’m going to shut up now.”

Pressing her lips together as tightly as humanly possible so her tongue will stop making horrible life decisions, she holds Titus’ bright yellow tennis ball out to his owner.

The man huffs, taking the ball from her hand. “I didn’t ask for your life’s story.”

Marinette blinks and then frowns. Her hand tightens around where she’s still holding onto Titus’ collar and she has to very carefully unclench her hand before she breaks it or something.

“I didn’t give it,” she says through clenched teeth, embarrassment abruptly forgotten. There’s no need for the man to be rude.

He scoffs. “Could’ve fooled me.”

She doesn't really have anything to say to that. Instead, she turns to Titus, who’s sitting like the good boy he is. She very seriously leans down to eye level—she does not have to lean down far—and tells him, “Your owner is an ass. But you are still a very good boy.”

She plants a kiss to his forehead that makes his tail wag, gives him one last scratch behind the ears and walks back towards her friends without looking back at the rude man. 

***

Colonel Bug: so I met kagami and felix’s lovechild today

MY HONOR: I would never stoop so low.

the evil twin: I would never stoop so low.

ShutUpTurtleMan: Nettie

dearest

the evil twin: Okay first of all-

ShutUpTurtleMan: sunshine

light of our collective lives and reason I breathe

what the fuCK

YoureUnderAgreste: Kagami, my love, how could you?

The Betrayal™

GottaGoFast: ew

Queen of Salt: ew

sneaky snake: Send pics or it didn’t happen

give me art or give me death: [a photo of the ‘right in front of my salad?’ meme]

Queen of Salt: wait

I was with you all day when did this happen?

was it the owner of the dog that attacked you?

ShutUpTurtleMan: WHAT

Colonel Bug: he didn’t attack me!

chloe stop spreading misinformation!

titus was a sweetheart!

YoureUnderAgreste: incorrect

he was, in fact, a menace

give me art or give me death: wait was Titus the dog or the lovechild

ShutUpTurtleMan: ^^^ ?

Colonel Bug: shut up adrien

all animals are great

stop being elitist

give me art or give me death: okay but seriously what kind of dog was it

the evil twin: why exactly was he our lovechild?

GottaGoFast: because of the dramatic tryst you and Kagami had obviously

keep up

Colonel Bug: because he was as pretty as he was rude actually

And gave me the feeling that he’d rant about his honor and parentage if it given the chance

MY HONOR: you say something once as an unsocialized teen

GottaGoFast: MARI YOU DOG!

ARE GETTING TAIL IN GOTHAM OF ALL PLACES?

Colonel Bug: no alix

did you not read the part about how rude he is

YoureUnderAgreste: i mean,,,,,

Felix is pretty rude and we all still like him

ShutUpTurtleMan: and Chloe

YoureUnderAgreste: oh good point nino

Colonel Bug: i hate it here

i spoke to him for like 2 seconds

Queen of Salt: Okay first of all-

YoureUnderAgreste: so i mean it’s not really a dealbreaker yaknow?

Colonel Bug: this familys a nightmare

i shoulda left you all on the street corner where i found you

YoureUnderAgreste: BUT CHA DINDT

ShutUpTurtleMan: but yA DIDNT

GottaGoFast: BUT CHA DIDNT!!

sneaky snake: but ya didn’t

***

I have every no regrets. stay tuned for more!

[chil2de]

How are you today? If its alright with you, can I request a Atsumu x fem reader where she has a super tomboy style and ALWAYS wears baggy clothes, but one day atsumu comes over to hang out and the only outfit she has left is kinda a tight fitting shirt and for the first time ever Atsumu realizes just how curvy his girlfriend is

sorry if thats to specific! feel free to ignorethis!

warning - miya atsumu x reader

hiii! i’m doing okay anonie, thank you and i hope u are faring well!!! so um this ended up being a LOT longer than i expected pls forgive me it was supposed to be a cute lil drabble but now its like uh 2k words aJdhfhhd, i really loved this idea!!! don’t worry ab it being too specific i actually like that and it helps give me a general idea about the req

well whilst this isn’t tooooo nsfw there are a few small themes in the beginning + swearing since i write atsumu like that and implications of sexual content ig at the end but aside from that? just some fluff for our fav king. characters are aged up and i am unsure how it would work but call it anime logic and enjoy! thanks for requesting! (okay rereading the ending is lowkey smut why am i like this)

“b-cup.” atsumu huffed with confidence. he took a large swig out of his water bottle, nodding his head wisely in affirmation.

“really? i’d say c-cup.” suna chimed in, his half-lidded gaze narrowing.

“nah, it’s b-cup”

“what the hell are you two talking about?” osamu interjected, concern and disgust thick on his features as he came over carrying a few towels.

“(y/n)’s bra size” suna nonchalantly responded, his eyes flicking up for a few seconds as he accepted the towel from osamu.

“‘tsumu i knew you were messed in the head but, suna? have you caught his germs?”

“fuck are you making it sound like i have some viral disease?”

“you don’t?” suna snorted, plopping down onto the floor to sit cross-legged.

“why don’t you just ask her?” osamu’s gaze flickered onto yours from across the court. you felt your ears burn from the way the three of them were staring at you.

was something on your face?

a bug? dirt?

“huh? like i’m supposed to say, hey baby girl, what size are your tits?”

“i’m still saying b-cup”

“c-cup”

“i think b-cup” osamu joined in, watching atsumu screw his face at him

“you goddamn hypocrite-“ “who’s being a hypocrite?” kita inquired with a half-hushed tone, making his way over with a few protein bars

“oh my god i’m going home” atsumu groaned, resting his palms on his knees as he stood up. he beelined towards you, his exhaustion painted his lazy smile beautifully. he still had the energy to turn around over his shoulder and flip his middle finger up at his team whilst his right hand snaked around to your waist.

somewhere around your waist. it took him a little bit of digging through all the fabric.

it didn’t matter to him, though. as much of a jackass as he might’ve been, he never judged you for the way you dressed. even if it meant that sometimes you looked a lil bit homeless, at the end of the day- he still had that glimmer in his eyes whenever he saw you.

you would be his favourite baby girl, no matter what.

“is that my shirt you’re wearing?” he hummed, glancing down to look at it.

it was, in fact, one of his shirts. it was matte black in colour, with a small dip that would showcase atsumu’s collar bones. it was a little bit faded from the many wash cycles it endured throughout its lifetime, but he would always notice the small tear in the bottom right section of the fabric.

“sorryyy, i know you just washed it but it smelled so nice. also, wow, did you put on deodorant? you actually smell like a man it’s kinda creepy”

“i always put on deodorant you dipshit, you’re always crying about how pretty my face looks so your nose doesn’t pick up the scent. it’s verbena citrus, buy your own because i know you’ll try stealing mine so i’m putting a padlock on that shit.” atsumu scoffed, digging his fingers into your sides to tickle you as you walked. you squirmed, swatting him away as you dug your hands into the pockets of your joggers. they were not atsumu’s, unfortunately, for you found out the hard way that you would literally have to drag the excess fabric behind you like some train dress or bundle it up and fold it, which, in retrospect- did not look too aesthetically pleasing. you settled for your own joggers and favourite high-top sneakers to match.

“you know you’ll say all this but give me your deodorant anyway, right?” you stuck your tongue out at him. he rolled his eyes, ruffling your hair.

“hey.” he called out, causing you to direct your attention towards him.

he nudged your arm with his elbow.

oh.

“give it here.”

you uncurled your left hand out of your pocket, zipping it up to make sure the contents inside didn’t spill. atsumu slid his right hand away from your waist and opened his palm up, intertwining his fingertips between yours into a tight lock. he grazed his thumb over the back of your hand, giving you a small squeeze.

“that was the cheesiest and most corniest thing you’ve done and i hated it” you made a mock gagging sound, averting your gaze.

you could feel the blush fresh on your cheeks, heart pounding in your chest like it was about to explode.

“wait, you thought i was holding your hand because we’re dating? i’m just doing it because i know your dumbass would get lost” atsumu snorted, throwing his head back in laughter.

well,

you could still see the light blush tinting his cheeks. and it wasn’t the sunset.

“mmm, should i wear this one- wait-“ you grabbed the shirt, folding it upwards as you took a small whiff. well,, you did wear it yesterday… yeah, you did put it in the laundry basket,,, no, it didn’t smell toooo bad, but..

you groaned, tossing it back into said basket as you furrowed your brows in concentration.

you heard the doorbell ring which only caused you to panic even further. you just needed a shirt. literally any shirt. you were about to cut your freaking pants out and sew them together to another pair for a shirt.

since it was a friday, you had atsumu walk you halfway home. you only lived a street away from him, and the apartment was conveniently built on a fork between the road down to his house and the supermarket. hence, he dropped you off and went to the store all by himself like a responsible adult to grab some snacks for the weekend.

“it’s open!” you called out, leaning your jaw back as you shouted in hopes for your voice to travel further.

in that moment, just in the corner of your eye- you saw a familiar flash of black.

you swooped the fabric up, quietly humming in pleasure when it smelled like laundry detergent and fabric softener.

you lifted the shirt over your head, struggling to pull it down for a few seconds.

you admired yourself briefly in the mirror.

it was a casual t-shirt. it reached down to the middle portion of your arms, though it was significantly less baggy than all of your other clothes. you liked to sleep in it during hot and stuffy summer nights, but rarely found yourself using it otherwise.

it’s not like you didn’t like these kinds of shirts.

but when given the option to look “stylish” or comfortable, who wouldn’t pick comfortable? that’s what was important to you above all. clothes that made you feel like you were constantly in bed were a godsend from the heavens.

“hey dipshit, i spent twenty minutes jumping stores for you but no one sold any (favourite drink) so i got you-“ atsumu halted in his steps, the grocery bags curled around his fists were suddenly forgotten and discarded as he caught sight of you through the doorframe.

you were clad in a pair of old white shorts and a black t-shirt, complimentary of the fact that everything else was currently in the laundry machine. atsumu could outline every single damn crevice and dip on you, and he burned that shit so deep into his retinas that he would still see it when his eyes were closed.

he felt his breath hitch, something deep inside him resonating, growing feral like hunger.

he still stood by what he said,

baggy clothes or not, you were beautiful.

but he wasn’t expecting this

“so you bought what?” you inquired, twisting your torso halfway to greet him as you finished brushing through some knots in your hair at the vanity.

“huh?”

“you said there wasn’t any (favourite drink) so you got what? did you fall and crack your head open on the way here? cause it looks like it”

you could feel your heart squeeze, body temperature increased twofold as icy hot waves wracked every inch of your skin. there was a cold sweat that rolled down the back of your knees.

“shut the hell up, i hate you” atsumu grumbled, forcing himself to turn away from you and stomp off to the kitchen with a pout.

“jesus christ give me strength i hate this woman, where the hell does she get off thinking she can get away with looking so good like that” atsumu mumbled incoherent curses underneath his breath, shakily unloading everything he bought out onto the counter and stuffing the groceries into cabinets and the fridge.

“‘samu, i hate you but dude i need twin telepathy, give me strength so i don’t deck this woman right here right now” he cursed, gritting his teeth. his self-control was about to fly out the window.

“you okay?” you popped your head through the door, leaning into the kitchen.

he could see the outline of your prominent collarbones, the way the shirt still fell a little bit and hung loosely off of your frame. he could see the start of your stomach.

god, it should’ve been illegal the way he wanted to grab your thighs. he wondered for a second what it would look like with his fingerprints etched into your skin there.

“want a few tissues and some lotion?” you snorted, nestling up beside him to help. you gazed at him, watching him keep his eyes narrowed on the packet of pistachios he was fumbling with.

you thought it was cute.

“listen- if you’re not ready yet then i’d suggest that you find something else to wear cause holy shit if you don’t get away from me right now i swear i will not restrain myself-“

“i’m ready” you hummed, giving him an innocent smile. you toyed with your hands behind your back, fiddling with them as butterflies swept your abdomen.

atsumu snorted, eyebrows creasing in confusion. he turned to face you, setting the pistachios down.

“alright i’m not saying this to boost my ego, but, what did you say?”

“i said i’m ready”

you watched his brain stir, gears ticking and turning like clockwork.

atsumu let out a low sigh.

“yeah, yeah. well, then.”

his right hand slammed against the wall, caging you in. he leaned into you, looming over you as his half-lidded eyes burned holes inside your soul. you felt the air tense and switch around him, carnal desires swirling behind his gaze. his chest was so close to yours, practically flush, save for the tiniest gap. you could literally feel his heart hammering.

he was so invasive, so close, yet so respectful. he still kept his distance, just n case you changed your mind.

“are you sure this is what you want?” his voice was hot and slick against the shell of your ear, voice husky and octaves deeper. you could feel the sexual tension dripping from him.

you wrapped your arms around his neck, resting your forehead against him.

“i’m sure, ‘tsumu.”

a loud chuckle ripped from the depths of his chest. it was so hearty, and fuck, it made you clench.

atsumu swooped you up all in one swift motion, hands hooking underneath your thighs as he shoved you against the counter. he sent everything clattering and thudding in the process.

“don’t say i didn’t warn you, doll.”

[milkacchan]

Request for anon- HC's for Class 1-A with a student native to the American south

Aha as a southerner, babe i got you

• The only reason that you're there is bc you had a connection to allmight. You were the sister of one of his friends from his study abroad in America and you needed help w your quirk.

• You had a strange quirk- it dealt with plants but it seemed to have a spiritual undertone- when you got upset enough and your emotions over took you, you'd go into a state of destruction.

• So obviously, uncle All might was all over it.

• You don't take the entrance exam which was a Bummer bc you wanted too

• Anyway, class A's ???

• You're introduced to class 1-A, All nights smile is wide and you wave shyly.

• You're a fucking phenomenon to them

• Your accent for one affects the way you speak Japanese- it makes it a little hard to understand you but they lowkey adored it

• Ahaha them tutoring you bc you butch so many words in Japanese

• You get accepted into the Bakusquad bc they, Mina specifically, wants to know everything about your state

• Mina will repeat your phrases she heard you say 'If you don start listening, I'm gonna take you behind and whip your tail' on the phone and repeats it during fights.

- 'HA! Kirishima I'm gonna whip your tail'

• You are SO proud

• You spit out pet names like it's no bug deal because that's just how it is in the south

• You call Mina Sugar once, her knees buckled under her and she had to sit down for a moment and just think about life for a sec

• You call people babe without really thinking about it- a habit that you've been trying to break but it's so hard.

• You do it without realizing and whoever it is will go so red in the face jfc

• They like making inside jokes based on how you talk

• Will call eachother 'Darlin' and 'sugar' after hearing you say it when you walk in a room

• You get sent 'care packages' by your brother, which consists of your favorite drinks and snacks that are only sold in the US (Aka cheerwhine ((which is only sold in the south, I've yet to see a cheerwhine in the north rip)) or Sweet tea and junk like that)

• You end up sharing some of it with the Bakusquad

• Not too much bc you live off this

• Kaminari made the mistake of taking a cheerwhine without asking you once

• and you DEMOLISHED him during training the next day

• Never again do they mess with your stuff

• They are HORRIFIED when you pick up a snake on a wood trail during a training exercise, and move it off the path

• 'Why the fuck did you touch it????'

- 'Well I didn't want it to hurt us and I dont want us to hurt it.'

- 'you could've moved it with a stick?'

- 'but it was no big deal picking it up, no problem.'

• They think that the entire south is gun totin, cowboy hat wearing, tan people and you have to explain that you've met some of the dumbest- city folk in the south

- Imagine the confusion when your brother sends you a fucking cowboy hat bruh

• They're SCREAMING with laughter

• You do not live it down

• They notice how you tend to hang around with the other American students and you're always a lot louder and touch with them

• Cue meeting in 1-A bc they think you're not comfortable enough w them

• You are but you dont want to overstep boundaries and do something wrong, you haven't quite grasped the culture yet

• Its not like many of them care, with all the near death experience they all have their own cuddle groups, even the more quiet ones

• You have to reassure them that it's not anything against them- you're just trying not to overstep

• They think its sweet

• Even though you're an honorary member of the Bakusquad, you still have relations with the Deku squad (forbidden I know)

• Bc obviously Deku wants to know everything about you and you're there a lot w him and all might anyway, so besties

• ITS A KNOWN FACT THAT SOUTHERN WOMEN HAVE THE VOICE AND THE LOOK

• Someone starts acting up? You give them the look. They dont take the hint? You use the momma voice and that usually shuts em up.

• You go with Deku and them to get Katsuki when he's kidnapped.

• This man hugs 2 people when no one is looking- after they get back.

• You and Kirishima.

• he won't talk about it though. He's still trying to keep his image.

• Aizawa takes it upon himself to teach you more about Japan when All might can't (after all he is a very busy man)

• He teaches you more about culture, boundaries, food- all that good junk

• The first time he see's you actually flip out is when the LOV attacked the training camp. Your eyes started glowing and he knew then just what All might had been talking about

• It seemed to be a little better- your friends weren't in immediate danger- but the villains in front of you were so lucky. Neither was the land around you.

• It wasnt horrible, seeing as your quirk was literally plants, but there were some broken trees and damaged rock.

• He'll also train with you, focus on breathing and meditation techniques.

• Leads you to get close with Shinsou

• Will you steal his jackets? Yes.

• But he takes some of your snacks (Kaminari feels BETRAYED)

• He'll imitate you just to be a dick

• but in all reality he'll love hearing your voice- especially in your native tongue

• CLASS 1-A WILL HAVE YOU READ TO THEM IN ENGLISH

• Theres something about your voice and your southern accent that makes them feel at ease and they just enjoy hearing you talk in English

• All in all, they treat you like family.

[petalshields]

[ ELLIOT KNIGHT, HE/HIM, CIS MAN ]  —  [ SABER WINSLOWE ]  is a child of  [ EPIONE ]  with the power of  [ PAIN SUPPRESSION + PATHOKINESIS ] .  they were born in  [ 1993 ]  and have been in nemean lion since  [ 2008 ] .  with the change, they  [ GRADUATED FROM ]  the  [ MEDICAL ]  role which makes sense since they’re usually  [ COUNSELING + READING + TRYING TO FEEL SOMETHING ] .  if you’d like to meet them try the  [ SUN ]  building .  —  garnet / she/her / kst / 18+ / @nlupdates​

it’s garnet ya’ll already know the vibes. this long as hell but bear with me.

Saber’s pinterest is here!

BIOGRAPHY!

saber did not grow up knowing the people he called his Ma and Pa were not his biological parents. Ma and Pa lived in a red barn hidden acres deep in rural New Haven, Kentucky and they prayed every night for a child that they couldn’t seem to conceive. one night, a woman appeared with her three-year-old son in tow, explaining that his father died in a tragic accident. the winslowes welcomed him inside and the woman disappeared into thin air. it wasn’t until the boy, who told them his name was saber, was fed, bathed, and asleep that they questioned where the woman came from. unbeknownst to them, it was the goddess of recovery epione, who just lost one of her mortal lovers and decided that saber could be the answer to the winslowe couple’s prayers.

starting he was around nine-years-old, saber bounced from foster home to foster home. he was taken from his doting parents who weren’t at all neglectful nor inattentive, but a concerned doctor reported the frequency of his hospital visits and the severity of his injuries. as a rambunctious lad who was always too curious, saber collected injuries the way other kids his age might’ve collected bugs. it did not help that he appeared to have an exceedingly high pain tolerance, and he wasn’t aware that a part of his body was wounded until someone pointed it out or he fell forward because his leg was broken.

while his parents were being investigated, at around the age of twelve, saber was placed in a particularly volatile household. its chaos could be felt the moment that he stepped inside. nonetheless, saber always had the gift of being a calming presence to those around him. even at his young age, he sympathized with others and always helped those in need, but he noticed that emotions could change quickly if he touched them. he could place two fingers on someone’s pulse and the heart of a mourning person would no longer thud under his fingertips, their sorrow drying on their cheeks. saber had the same effect on his aggressive foster family, who he would touch on the shoulder, elbow, or hand to calm them down. they’d always shake him off, but their mood visibly shifted, and saber would watch them walk away from the battle they’d almost started. he couldn’t relate to such extreme displays of emotion — while he wasn’t without empathy, he did not feel deeply for himself.

emotions became a puzzle that he wanted to solve, and saber poured over books about the topic to better understand his foster family. it was his obsession and he began to absorb random facts about how the brain functioned. this led saber into reading more, curiosity becoming less physical and tactile and more intellectual, using a flashlight under his covers at night to consume more knowledge.

when saber was thirteen, going on fourteen in a few days, he was claimed by epione sending a garter snake into his box-sized front lawn. saber, who was outside at the time, bent down to examine the creature, and when he looked up, there was a woman that he’d never seen before standing with his social worker. His social worker introduced him to his mother and explained that he’d be going with them to a new place, giving him time to pack his suitcase with his things. he did as he was told, waving goodbye to his foster family. they grumbled about having one less mouth to feed.

in the car, saber couldn’t stop looking at his mother, who was so familiar yet a stranger, and it was then that his social worker told him about his godly heritage. that because he’d been claimed by his mother, he was in danger, so he had to go somewhere he could be kept safe. that somewhere was nemean lion.

saber was a little awkward at first, but he found his strides, excelling in his training. he stayed in the standard track for the first year before switching to medical. many thought that he could have been a hero because of his bravery and his inability to feel pain, but he chose to follow his passion in trying to crack the brain. he received basic medical training, but by the time he was eighteen, he remained on campus for a little bit longer to study psychology.

at nemean lion, saber became close with another boy, another demigod. saber never had a crush before and he didn’t feel the clichés. the affinity that he felt towards the other boy was chosen rather than felt — he chose to speak with him for hours, he chose to go on dates with him, and he chose to kiss him back. in addition, saber also vowed to never change the other boy’s emotions with his ability — it was nice to have something that flourished organically without manipulation on his part.

homophobia tw: saber and his boyfriend married immediately after graduation and he brought his new husband back to meet Ma and Pa. the aging couple was set in their ways, and though they tried, they did not approve of saber marrying someone so quickly. when saber asked them if they would have approved if he did the same with a woman, he found their answer in their hesitance. his husband stormed out and saber filed behind him. “why didn’t you say anything?” his husband spat at him. saber didn’t say anything in response, understanding the reason for the reproach, that perhaps he should have said something, but he also logically understood that their bigotry wasn’t his problem. he touched his husband’s cheek, absorbing the pain and anger, something he swore he’d never do to his husband. but he did, and for the remainder of their time together, he didn’t forgive himself for it.

saber and his husband had a few honeymoon years before the marriage unraveled, but saber wasn’t aware of the unraveling. he came home one night to find his husband packing his bags, claiming that he no longer felt that spark between them and he hadn’t for a while now. saber simply responded that he didn’t notice, withholding that he felt the distance between them increase but couldn’t do anything about it, didn’t know what to do. he didn’t want to use his power to fabricate contentment, even love, where there was little to none. his husband said “you never notice, because you don’t know how to care.” it was an act of caring, however, that saber let him go find whatever would make him happy. shortly after, the divorce papers were filed, and his last name legally changed back to winslowe.

saber owns his own private practice, and he services both humans and demigods. the whole point of his character is that he’s telling other people how to get their lives together while his own is a hot mess, and he can be a bit of a hypocrite. but it be like that!

WANTED CONNECTIONS!

CLIENTS: everybody needs a lil therapy

EX-HUBBY: i’ll probably put a wanted connection in for this, but if you think that your muse could have been married to Saber....i just think we could have that conversation.

SOCRATIC CIRCLE: ezra stokes and sila demir zerhouni are part of this little group, where they get together and discuss intellectual stuff over coffee. if you think your muse would be interested in joining them, let me know!

MENTEES: the mind’s just as important as the body, and i imagine saber has a lot of insight that’s useful for other medical track kids. however it doesn’t have to be restricted to just the med kids, let him be ur dad friend.

CONFIDANT: someone who saber can hit up and be like “so do you feel nothing or is it just me” u feel me??

OLD FRIENDS/LIKE SIBLINGS: saber tries to be a good person and he really values his connections, so he maintains his friendships. he definitely got his shit rocked by his husband suddenly divorcing him so he really wants to figure out how to have relationships that mean something to other people.

ANYTHING: hit my line babes

[gxngsoflondon]

As The World Caves In - Part 1/?(Sean Wallace x Reader)

A/N: Hi guys! This first chapter is mainly background information, so bear with me (its not the most action packed chapter but it is 100% necessary).This is going to be a pretty long series so lemme know if you want to be added to a tag list xxxx

Materlist!

Part 1: Bang Bang! (My Baby Shot Me Down)

Nothing good ever becomes of the girl unfortunate enough to fall in love with a Wallace.

There is blood, thick pools of the stuff, not all of it yours.

There is too much blood.

You are running out of time.

This is how you’re going to die, you are sure of it now. But before you do, they are going to take him away from you.They are going to pull everything worth living for out of your sorry little world.

Sean.

You will not let them take Sean from you. You will make sure that he’s safe.

You hear them coming now.

This is it.

/// 16 Years Before \\\

A giggle fills the garden.

It’s more of a squeal in all honesty, carefree and silly and full of joy. Children’s laughter. The innocence of a little girl’s giggle is out of place here.

Innocence is out of place here.

“Ha! Sean! You’re out!” you call “I got you fair and square.”

Three fathers and three mothers sit on black woven garden furniture. Wallace, Dumali, Anderson, London crime royalty. There is no business to attend to today so they are also laughing, glasses of champagne in hand as they watch their children play on wooden stick horses in the April sunshine.

“Nuh uh Y/N! You didn’t shout BANG”

“Yes I did!”

“I didn’t hear you”

“Me neither”

“I did! I did! You’re all dead!’

“You absolutely did not”

You are tall for your age. A pretty white dress, white tights, pristine white shoes, but your pigtails are falling out, the dainty white ribbons becoming a tangled mess and you run to keep up with the boys.

Billy. Skinny, ears and elbows jutting out, a mop of curly brown hair.

Alex. Taller, dimpled cheeks and nervous eyes, deep chocolate skin.

Sean. Grinning, exploding with freckles, blonde eyelashes so long they tangled themselves.

“Watch, like this Y/N,” Sean says patiently, turning his fingers into a gun “BANG! BANG!”

Billy and Alex theatrically hit the ground, taking great pleasure in twitching and convulsing as they pretend to die.

You gallop towards them just as Alex starts to sit up.

“BANG!” you yell and he falls down again. Sean is smirking at you as you both trot together, linking arms as you parade around victorious. You stand on your tiptoes and you kiss his cheek, sparking fits of laughter from Alex and vomiting sounds from Billy.

“She’s precious that one,” Marian coos, she is watching you as you  march the length of the garden clutching her own son. She adores you, loves you almost as much as her own.

Your mother laughs.

“She’s not all sweetness and sugar, i’d check you’ve got all of your jewlery when we leave she’s going through a ‘borrowing without permission’ phase,”

Finn guffaws

“Still a damnsight sweeter than my boys”

“You might be stuck with her, she came up to me the other day asking ‘When I marry Sean will I get to stay at Aunty Marians all the time?’”

Marian grins again.

“I guess Alex is out of luck then,” chuckles Mrs Dumani. She is sat cross legged on the grass with the girls. Jacquline and Shannon are oil painting canvases, something not even the promise of sweets would bribe you into doing.

Trust me, your mother had already tried.

She wished you’d stay away from the boys, even further away from the family business.

Gangs are no place for little girls.

“My daddy’s going to show us a real gun!” Alex says as you watch all three fathers approach you, “Now that Billy’s seven, we’re all old enough,”

“But- I’m still five?”

“Yes but Y/N you're a girl,” says Billy pointedly, grimacing with the word as if it tastes foul.

You scowl at your brother Tom, a teenager now, as he picks you up and carts you back to your mother.

You love Tommy more than anybody in the world, so you only kick him twice.

”Why can’t I stay with the boys! None of this is fair!” you announce, your arms are crossed, lip pouting in defiance.

Your mother isn’t phased, she’s been practicing this conversation. The Wallace and Dumani mothers are smiling encourangling at her, they have been here before themselves.

They will raise smart daughters, undeniably good and honest and strong.

Their husbands will raise smart businessmen, undeniably rich, undeniably powerful.

“Look at you darling, you are my treasure. I love you very much,” Your mother is stroking your hair and when you try to pull away, she cups her hand to your cheek. ‘And you know why we stay away from Daddy’s business, don’t you”

“I know but-’

“That’s right, to keep you safe and sound dear,”

This isn’t the first time you’ve shown interest in the family business. That’s what is worrying Mrs Anderson and what is making her face settle into an unsupressable frown.

“But-”

It is Marian Wallace that speaks next.

“Try and listen to your mother Y/N”

She is looking at you with a firm, no bullshit stare. You know this is an order.

‘It's not fair! They get to-”

“Y/N, it’s a scary world out there. There is no place for you in that horriblness do you understand?” a more mellow Mrs Dumani says.

Yet, you don’t understand, how could you? Your mother had done everything in her power to shelter you from the violence attached to your surname.

Only Tom would be expected to contiue the family business.

“But I’m not scared of anything!”

Guillabe, naive, innocent, ditsy. How do you explain to a 5 year old that they inherited a world of death, drugs and crime?

Your brother has an idea. “Man eating spiders, cannibal clowns” He is sneaking up behind you and whispering in your ear

“Thugs, criminals, beasts, Please, they’ll eat you up, alive!”

Your skin takes on a crawling quality, even though you know it’s only Tommy, you are starting to panic.

“No!”

“Yes!”

“But-”

“Also, snakes and large bugs, men with pointy teeth, slimy monsters that creep under your bed at night and swallow you whole”

Any joking quality is removed from Tom's voice. He is doing everything he can to scare you.

It is working. You are only a small child

Guilt flashes on his face when your bottom lip quivers slightly.

“Tommy that’s enough, you’re upsetting her.” Marian again.

You are running straight to your mother, her arms opening to wrap you in a tight embrace.

“You’ll be safe as long as you stay with Mummy okay?”

You agree and she is still cradling you when Finn, Ed and your father return. They had left the boys inside.

“You haven’t been crying have ya?” Finn says. He bends down to ruffle your hair and you shake your head violently.

“Look I know you might want to be like the boys. Personally, I wouldn’t bother, cabbage heads the lot of them. But if you ever see one of these-”

He reaches into his pocket.

And then Finn Wallace gives a five year old girl a gun.

“-I want you to run in the opposite direction, do ya hear me?”

Your mother’s eyes are wide with shock, Marian’s mouth open ready to lecture her husband. But he takes the gun back from you before you can wrap your fingers around it.

“I want you to make me and Uncle Finn a promise Y/N. You wouldn’t lie to us would you? You won’t ever go near one of these will you? It’s very important”

It was your father this time.

“Of course not Daddy,”

“Good, now why don’t you play with Jackie and Shannon?”

“Actually,” your mother says, almost eager to leave now ”I think our drivers here”

You rush through your goodbyes and are herded into the back of the black vehicle. Your daddy sits in the front with the driver, you sit in the middle in the back. You aren’t quite sure why, but you feel the urge to give Tommy a big hug. You do.

As you pull out of the Wallace estate, you see the boys pressed up against a large bay window. Alex is grinning at you, Billy pulling a hideous face and sticking his tongue out. It’s only Sean that is actually waving at you, and you are waving back.

“Why can’t we all live together in one big house Mummy?” you ask.

Your father chuckles.

“Come now Y/N, we’ll be back again tomorrow. Just like always.”

You are smiling as the boys in the window disappear from view, knowing you’ll be back playing with them in the morning. Just like always.

But this is the last time you will see the Wallaces, for a very very long time.

(Part 2!!!)

[hextiger]

More Research Excerpts

This time it's Der Alptraum in Beziehung zu gewissen Formen mittelalterlichen Aberglaubens. (English: The Nightmare in Relation to Certain Forms of Medieval Superstition).

You can find the PDF here via Project Gutenberg, but it's in German.

For context though: this appeared in 1902 in a magazine published by Sigmund Freud. That fact is very much apparent throughout.

Introduction

"My focus is not on the historical side but the deepest psychological meaning" phrases that clue you in that there's a lot of nonsense coming

Nowadays the word "Weib" really just reads as "woman (derogatory)"

Dream and Belief

"the breath soul and the shadow soul" I'm sorry what. What! Shadow soul?????

"Freud's discovery of psychoanalysis" I don't know that I'd call it a discovery rather than "wholesale invention" or maybe "ass-pull" but sure

You can at times REALLY tell this is influenced by Freud. Example: "The more people have a certain type of dream the more likely it is that its' subliminal content is of a sexual nature" good (?) news for all the people who dream about their teeth falling out

Something something dreaming of your dead mother or father something something oedipus complex repressed in childhood

You can really tell this was written in the early 20th century. Take me back to the 18th/19th century weirdness please

"In a court in 1516 the jury of Trojes admonished the caterpillars who had devastated some distracts on punishment of curse and excommunication to leave within a certain number of days" I have SO MANY questions

The source for the above is "Cesaresco. Essays in the Study of Folk-Songs, P. 183" which I now have to read

Nightmares

"It is generally known that nightmares have a greater influence on the fantasy of waking life than any other dream" my dude you JUST went on for a whole chapter abt sex dreams so like are you sure

"I have added that the repression of female masochistic sexual urges is more suited to the creation of the typical nightmare than that of the male one, a view that Adler agrees with" I just wanna read abt weird hairy creatures sitting on people's chests, not this nonsense

Ok HERE'S something interesting. Dude's talking about how nightmares express deeply repressed wishes like yes. This I can vibe with

"Digestive problems do not explain the appearance of beautiful women from keyholes" sure but if that were a thing I'd sure as hell take the digestive problems

Incubus and Incubation

"In the middle ages the belief was generally that there were evil spirits whose sole function was to have [...] intercourse with sleeping people" HE JUST SAYS THIS. WITHOUT A SOURCE

"A favorite form that incubi took was that of clergy. Hieronmyus reports the story of a young lady who called for help against an incubus which her friends found under their beds in the form of the bishop Sylvanus. The reputation of the bishop would have suffered if he had been unable to convince them that the incubus had taken his form"

People at the time reacted by saying "Oh an excellent example for the wizardry of Sylvanus" so I don't think this bishop was believed

Anyway I WISH that had been an incubus but it really sounds like it was just a creepy old dude

Sir why do you keep randomly throwing untranslated French quotes in this German text

Oh hey another mention of people who were supposedly children of incubi. This time it's Alexander the Great, Caesar, Martin Luther, Plato, all of the Huns and everyone who lived on Cyprus

You're right, it would be unnecessary to linger on how snakes are phallic symbols thank you for not doing that

"The belief that the soul leaves the sleeper in the form of a snake which escapes through the mouth" UM HOLD ON

I checked the source and yeah, that sure is a thing

This one's from Thorpe. Northern Mythology, 1851, Vol I. P. 289f https://archive.org/details/northernmytholog01thoruoft/page/n309/mode/2up

The Vampire

"The wish for reunion, which has its origin in the living person, is here partially projected on the dead" FINALLY some good content

"Widows can get pregnant by their vampiric husbands visiting" uhuh sure

"After the transformation into a vampire is complete it can be discovered by finding the unburied body with red cheeks, tightskin, full blood vessels, warm blood, grown hair and nails and open left eye"

May have found another source on alps here. Features slut-shaming of sphinxes as far as I can tell

"The Wallachian myth wherein dead redheaded men appear in the form of frogs, bugs etc. and drink the blood of pretty girls"

So depending on which church you were a part of before committing heresy you'd either become a werewolf (roman-catholic) or a vampire (greek)

"Like the vampire the Alp can be the soul of a dead person and suck the blood of sleeping people" whhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhy do I only read this now

The Werwolf

Apollo's apparently associated with wolves, which I did not know

Oh yeah I forgot about the part of werewolf lore that's like "Yeah they turn their human skin inside-out cause the other side is a wolf pelt"

If you're born on christmas day you're apparently destined to become a werewolf as punishment for your parent daring to deliver on the same day as Mary

"The seventh son is destined to become a werewolf, the seventh daughter a mare" mmmmmmmmm there's Something here I may be able to use

Quick gallows, wow what's that? Oh. Oh it's a gallows where the person has their hands bound behind their back, is pulled up by their bound hands on a pulley and then dropped from great height??????? That's uh. That doesn't sound like a good experience

Armenian werewolves are women who sinned and were thus punished by having to live for seven years as a werewolf.

There's also a creature that's somewhat between werewolf and vampire which, apparently sucks blood from the soles of the feet of people walking by

Very rough translation but "One has to burn the werewolf because otherwise he will rise from his grave a few days later. In ravenous hunger he will eat the flesh from his own hands and feet and when he has nothing else on his body to consume he will burrow out from his grave at midnight, fall into the herds and steal the animals or even go into houses, lay down by the sleeping and suck their blood from them" this is good, actually

I cannot stress enough how openly freudian this thing is

Werewolves can apparently also leave behind their bodies and wander about at night

Devilworship

"Belief in devils can be traced back to an oedipus complex" ok. sure

Apparently the devil used to be a close parallel to jesus. The whole deal: twelve apostles, went to hell and was reborn, hot bod

The devil had his own bible which was written down in Bohemia and is now in a library in Stockholm k so who's down for a trip to Stockholm after [waves hands] all this is done

"One of the later bynames of the devil was Grendel (english Grant)"

The devil is canonically bisexual and bigender

He can only impregnate folks if he previously acts as a succubus

....Merlin was a son of the devil? He was born because the devil was imitating God? His purpose was to defeat Jesus? Is this what Fate Grand Order is about

"if a woman sleeps alone the devil sleeps with her" well good for her

The devil has a second face on his butt that looks like a beautiful woman's face. He sits the wrong way around in chairs. His genitals are on his back

The Witch Epidemic

Witches like to eat babies, especially unbaptized ones

Witches apparently sometimes turned men into horses to ride to sabbath??? rad

Or they rode the devil himself in form of a horse or goat. sure

Why would witches have stigmata. I want to know, but not enough to check the source that's cited for this

The roman-catholic church is at fault for witchcraft

Apparently 40 year old witches turn into Drude which are also similar to alps

In Conclusion

This entire thing was a trip but I cannot recommend reading it or a translation. It's far too Freudian for my tastes. At least there's a little bit here that I can use for A Pale Imitation and its potential sequels.

[erumai-maadu]

so after several increasingly insane messages to Alex at ungodly hours of the night, I caved (haha), posted about my new obsession, and now I have once again been enabled by @tamale104, so you’re gonna hear about the latest obsession I gained from research for my fic: The Sơn Đoòng Cave.

long, LONG post below the cut

Hang Sơn Đoòng, translated from Vietnamese as either “cave of the mountain river” or “cave of mountains behind Đoòng (village)” is a cave in the Phong Nha-Kẻ Bàng National Park in Vietnam, near the Laos-Vietnam border. It’s between 2 to 5 million years old, and is a solutional cave, which means it was formed by water dissolving soluble limestone. The cave has an internal fast-flowing river called Rao Thuong, and it’s this river that carved out the cave over millions of years.

The cave was discovered in 1991 by a local man named Hồ Khanh, who was, at the time, a logger looking for agarwood, a valuable timber. However, the steep descent into the cave (a 200 ft drop!), as well as the sound of roaring water coming from within discouraged him from entering. Later, in 2009, a group of cavers from the British Cave Research Association were conducting a survey of the national park and explored the cave, giving it international fame.

The main passage of the cave is the largest in the word by volume, big enough that a Boeing 747 plane could fly through with ease without having to fear for its wings. It’s 200 meters (660 ft) high and 150 meters (490 ft) wide. The cave also contains some of the world’s largest stalagmites (those are the ones that come from the floor), such as the 200 ft tall Hand of Dog stalagmite.

The story behind that weird name, in a quote from one of the first people to explore the cave, Howard Limbert: “A woman on our original expedition asked if she could name it. She shouted ‘The Hand of God,’ and the lad who wrote it down wrote ‘Hand of Dog’ instead. We didn’t know it was going to be famous, so some names are a bit weird.”

The cave’s size is because of two factors, the river running through it, and the fault line it sits on.

My favorite thing about this cave are the two dolines, places in the cave where the ceiling has collapsed. The first doline, named Watch Out for Dinosaurs, is a small hole in the ceiling that lets in mesmerizing beams of sunlight. Small ferns grow on the rocks where the sunlight touches. 

(image taken from the cave tour company’s website, Oxalis Adventures. The picture is taken with artificial lighting to brighten the surroundings. The second picture is from the CNBC article linked in my sources list. it’s done with minimal artificial lighting.)

The cave is so big that it has its own weather system. The sunlight from the dolines heats the water from the river, forming clouds inside the cave that give moisture, allowing plants to grow on the rocks.

So after the first doline, you pass through a chamber whose walls are made entirely of fossils, making the rock white, and then through the cave’s biggest chamber, the one that a 747 could fly through without its wings being in any danger. 

Then, you get to the second doline and my absolute favorite part of the cave: the Garden of Edam. The second doline is large enough that it allows enough sunlight for a jungle to grow 820 feet below the ground. 

(picture of the aerial view was taken from the CNBC article. second picture is taken from the wikipedia article.)

(it looks so pretty at night, I wanna live there.)

In the cave’s jungle, trees grow as big as 150 feet tall, and species of monkeys, snakes, at at least one type of eagle owl live there. There are also at least two types of flightless birds running around there. 

There are also the cave bugs and fish that live deeper in the cave, far far past the dolines but I’m not talking about them bc they’re creepy and I hate creepy crawlies. Just know the fish’s skin is white/translucent and the creepy crawlies have no eyes because evolution.

this cave also features cave pearls the size of baseballs, which is highly unusual. Pic also describes them.

During rainy season, a lake nearly 2000 ft wide fills up the cave. It’s usually gone by June.

The cave is gorgeous and I have an absolute obsession with it, and if you’re interested in learning more than the brief (ish) overview I gave, check out my sources, listed below!!

- this cool article from cnbc that has gorgeous pictures of the journey to and into the cave

- the wikipedia article that also has some really nice pictures of the cave

- this national geographic 360 degree tour thing of the cave was my biggest source of info. you have to click the screen to start and then the sidebars teach you how to navigate and stuff and also give cool facts. Works better on desktop or tablet but it’s SO COOL to see and I highly recommend it. The whole thing took me around 45 mins to get through but I was going back and forth and writing things and taking my sweet time so I’d estimate it’d take around 20 mins normally.

[thewritewolf]

Two For Two Chapter 12: Falling

A sky-high supervillain forces our heroes to use the yellow potion of flight.

@ladynoirjuly2020

Enjoy!

First Chapter | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Read on Ao3

If Hawkmoth was going to repeat akuma ideas, Adrien would prefer if he’d at least repeat the fun ones. Like Gamer 2.0 or Mister Pidgeon. Well, maybe not Mister Pidgeon exactly since Adrien was always sent into sneezing fits for those fights, but still. Something easy or at least fun.

Certainly not being shot into space, like with Startrain or the Bubbler. And yet, that was exactly where Adrien found himself now. Riding a tiny spaceship - almost more a rocket with some cargo space - into the upper atmosphere.

Adrien shook his head and started digging through his bag.

“Correct me if I am wrong but,” Sass began, looking out the convenient window. “I feel that thisss is not good?”

“Great job, sass, you’ve really nailed it,” Plagg said, rolling his eyes. He crossed his arms and looked at Adrien. “So what’s the plan, kid? I doubt the bug is gonna be able to get you out of this mess.”

“Well, she sort of already did.”

“Huh?”

“Just give me a second… Aha!” He pulled out the container full of dyed cheeses. “Yellow is going to be our best bet, I think.”

“Bleh! Yellow potion tastes awful.” Plagg stuck out his tongue. He grabbed Sass and pushed him towards Adrien. “You’re the new kwami on the block, so you’re gonna have to take this one for me.”

Adrien gave a worried look to Sass who shrugged.

“Worry not, I am sssure you are in harmony enough with me to make full ussse of my powersss.” Sass tentatively took the cheese, his thin forked tongue darting out to taste it. “Hm… It has been some time since I have had some of the Guardians’ brew.”

“Okay, let’s give this a shot…” Adrien cleared his throat. “Plagg, claws out! Sky Sass, Plagg, unify!”

Snake Noir took a moment to stretch his wings and look at himself before he busted out of his rocket. His eyebrows rose when he saw in the reflection of the window that his bald cap had been replaced with a mane of rainbow feathers, and his mask had lost its domino mask appearance and looked painted on.

It suddenly hit him and he blinked in surprise. Wings?

Sure enough, he glanced to the sides and saw emerald green wings made of long feathers that reached to his knees even when held out completely. The edges and tips of the wings were lined with short white feathers, which naturally drew his eyes toward his chest, which was now coated with a crimson plumage.

He wasn’t sure what he had been expecting with a flight transformation, but in hindsight wings made sense. What surprised him even more was how using them already felt like second nature. Snake Noir punched out the window with cataclysm and leapt out of the rocket, plummeting towards the ground where he knew that his lady was fighting alone.

-------------------------------

Marinette watched another set of rockets blasting off into the sky, her lips pressed into a thin line of determination.

“If I am not mistaken, that doesn’t seem like the standard fare for Parisian life,” Longg commented drily. “What is to be done about it?”

“Marinette is going to go after them, of course!” Tikki said resolutely, brimming with confidence. “Right, Marinette?”

“No doubt about it, Tikki.” Marinette pulled out a yellow dyed cookie. “But I think we’ll need a little extra help this time, just in case whoever this is catches us.”

“That’s a great idea!” Tikki’s enthusiasm dimmed a bit. “But it might be best if you give that to Longg.”

“Why’s that?” Marinette scrunched up her eyebrows.

“Not all power ups are created equal, young Guardian,” Longg said with a bow. “Some kwami take better to the brews than others.”

“Yes. I’ll give you the power of flight, sure. But Longg’s is faster and more nimble.”

Longg nodded sagely. “The lack of wings also means you cannot be suddenly robbed of your gifts.”

“No wings? Then how do you-” Marinette shook her head vigorously. “Never mind, I guess I’ll find out.” She passed the cookie to Longg. While he was eating, she said, “Tikki, spots on!”

The potion took effect and Ladybug took a moment to brace herself for whatever was about to happen. “Tikki, Sky Longg, unify!”

At first, she didn’t really notice anything different. That lasted until she realized that she was floating a couple meters off the ground and her hair had lengthened into a massive, shimmering wave that rippled behind her like a dragon’s tail. She willed herself to move and found that her hair always stayed behind her and glided of its own accord as she flew in a direction.

Dragonbug understood what Tikki meant about Longg’s power of flight. The smoothness of it was like a dream as she easily sailed into the air and looked for the akuma. Which, judging by the yelling, called himself Rocketman. He lived up to the name too - besides the rockets that he sent people up in, he had what looked like a jet-boosted surfboard that he used to fly around and an outfit that looked like a fashion moghul had been given five minutes to design a suit with only the word ‘rocket’ as their guiding principle.

Not only was Dragonbug fighting for Paris and its people today - she was fighting to end this abomination in the eyes of fashion.

Rocketman was just about to catch another group of people when she snared his board with her yoyo and yanked it to the side, sending the rockets harmless into the ground. There, they burst into smoke after failing to capture anyone. An angry glare was on his face as he whipped around to look at her, before quickly melding into a look of maddened joy.

“Its about time one of you showed up. I was beginning to think you’d already been sent sky high!” He spun his board around to face her. “And now you will have the honor of being beaten by ROCKETMAN!”

“Keep dreaming,” Dragonbug said as she nimbly dodged the rockets sent toward her. “Way better villains than you have had their butts kicked by me.”

“They had to fight two meddling heroes.” Rocketman grinned. “I only have to fight one.”

He unleashed a wild barrage of rockets and it was all she could do to avoid it. Despite her earlier confidence, she was worried she would have to waste time - or worse yet, one of her powers - to break free. Especially when she had to go at double speed to dodge one rocket… and the momentum carried her into the path of another.

Her jaw clenched as she prepared to take the hit.

But it never came.

Instead, there was a loud clanging noise and a wild blur of greens and blacks and reds. Snake Noir had plummeted from above and smacked the rocket, sending it into a tailspin toward the ground. His wings stabilized him and he shot her a playful wink before turning back toward the Rocketman.

“You were pretty close there! You almost winged my lady. I can’t let you get away with that, now can I?”

“Nice wings, chaton.”

“Thank you, m’lady! And can I just say, I love what you’ve done with your hair today?”

“Hey! How dare you-” While Rocketman launched into a tirade about them not taking him seriously, Dragonbug drifted forward toward her partner.

“Chat,” she whispered. “Can you distract him while I summon my lucky charm?”

“Leave it to this cat to cause some mayhem!” He grinned and with a few powerful strokes of his wings soared above Rocketman and dived toward him.

With the akuma on the backfoot for now, Dragonbug summoned her lucky charm. A frown creased her face as a tall glass bottle - red and spotted, naturally - dropped into her hands.

“A bottle?” She shook it and felt liquid slosh around inside it. “Full of… something. Reminds me of-” Her eyes widened as she had a moment of remembering the meal her papa had made just the day before. “Oh!”

She threw it over the akuma and yelled out to her partner. “Chat! Break it!”

There was no hesitation or any questions on his part. In the span of a second he’d glanced from her to the bottle and immediately extended his baton and smashed the bottle. The akuma raised its arms to block as glass shards and a pale yellow liquid rained down on him.

Confusion gripped his face as he sniffed it. “...Olive oil?”

Snake Noir glanced back at her and she made a subtle motion to follow her. Then she flew away from the akuma at top speed, staying close to street level, but not so fast that he couldn’t keep up. Snake Noir was right behind her.

“Hey! Get back here,” Rocketman shouted indignantly as he gave pursuit. Even from this distance she could see the purple mask outline around his face - no doubt Hawkmoth was warning him about a trap, but Rocketman was in no mood to listen.

“What’s the plan, LB?”

“Just follow right behind me, okay? We’re going to make a hard turn in 3… 2… Now!”

They both suddenly veered to the right around a building. Rocketman turned as well…

...only to slide right off his board.

“Oh, the oil!” Snake Noir hit his forehead. “I get it now.”

“Mhm. Now if you’d be a good chaton and break that board.”

“Your wish is my command, bugaboo.”

A quick purification and Ladybug Cure later, and the two of them were fistbumping over another victory.

[wroteclassicaly]

Dibs

A/N: Heeeeeeeey, loves! I’m back and pretty proud of this one! It’s a two part story, this obviously being the first part. Smut will be in the next one. I’ve wanted to write this idea since I came up with it the night of the season premiere. 

Reader is plus size in this one. She is also Chef Bertie’s daughter. There’s some major self-esteem issues and some self-bashing in this one, so be warned. I hope ya’ll enjoy! Lemme know what you think? :) 

P.S. I’ve changed a few things around to fit the reader in. Dialogue, mostly. It’s not that much of a change though, so don’t worry. 

Also, I can’t seem to get my taglist to work right, so I don’t tag anyone. I’m sorry. :(

Pairing: Xavier Plympton x Female reader

Word count: 2,691

Warnings: Explicit language, references to smut and virginity, self-esteem issues, poor body image issues

Looking forward to something during the summer months wasn't usually your forte, but this season seemed to be taking drastic approaching turns already. You'd been coerced into coming help your mom work the kitchen of Camp Redwood. Massacres and legends galore, bugs and snakes touring your housing. Sounded so fun to you. Your mom didn't want to leave you at your home alone, so you hesitantly agreed to get away from the dangers in Los Angeles and help out at the camp with her.

The drive up you imagined all sorts of various and vile scenarios. Woods and stories caught your imagination and refused to leave without a searing tongue lashed haunting. Your mom had assured you things would be okay this time around, that she wouldn't let anything happen to you, but it still felt so unsettling to be surrounded by nothing but dirt and trees and a large body of midnight fresh water. For your mom, however, you opted for the positive side of things, and sucked it up. You met with the eccentric and eerie Margaret, hovering closely to any exits you could think about, then escaped to the cabin you would be sharing with your mother to put your things away.

Margaret had informed you and your mom that a group of counselor volunteers would be arriving in the afternoon, leaving your stomach to tumble into the anxiety founded pits it always was. You hated much social interaction, even living in one of the world's largest cities. You avoided leisure activities and parties that were too high octane. You cared only about the peace and quiet, a few close friends, your books, and your music. You were grateful you had been permitted to bring along some albums and your record player, because without it, you could not function.

Setting out your music, you had tasked yourself out to sweep and mop the dining hall and kitchen. Covered in sweat and grime, hair pulled back into a messy mopped bun, the entire area became brand new once more. So much so that you had to stand and admire, the enriching draped melodies from Stevie Wonder casting a serene, echoing production to highlight your hard work. You hadn't noticed until Margaret jabbed a nail into your tank top clad shoulder, causing you to nearly deck her in the face with your broom handle. She raised a manicured brow, annoyance perched on her poker faced features, asking you to come meet the newest additions to the staff, as they would be arriving soon and you still had to bring food into the kitchen pantry.

Reluctantly, you followed your camp leader out into your new life for the next few months.

~*~

Present day: The First Night

Your insides feel as if they have all been twisted together like licorice, coolness spreading through your veins, erecting goosebumps all across your flesh. You self-consciously grip your noticeable stomach, already prepared for an array of flashy and skimpy clothed girls to accompany muscular, tight fitted guys. You don't fit in. Not being more than overweight, but what doctors seemed to call obese, with a swell to your face and the rest of you in places all around your thick form. In this day and age, not many girls your size are praised or celebrated in music and on television.

Sure, there were a few, but the movies you have seen are the overweight girl being an extra, a classmate, the bestfriend, the loner, the reject, or the propping joke. Fat is funny in LA, you aren't stupid. And no matter how far you run from it, you'd have to face scrutiny, even here. Your thinking is pregnant with triplets on this one, as you don't even bat a blink walking out with the Carrie White's mother - Margaret White -esque Camp owner, to meet everyone. Worn sneakers and boots from different brand names dusted in California soil is what you see before meeting the eyes of a very petite brunette.

That's the first counselor that smacks your self-esteem straight into the pits of hell. And the blonde girl near her in the colorful and tight outfit? Yeah, you want to find a hole and dig it twelve feet under. Six feet for your humiliation, adding on an additional six for your fat ass body. You want to run, but, yeah, right.

If you don't speak then you will look stupid, more so than you do now, covered in perspiration and dirt smudges. Margaret makes an introduction that collides right into you stepping behind your mom, getting an eyeful of the two handsome guys with the girls, reaching for a crate of eggs, attempting to look busy as to bay the awkward pause. Everyone says a few brisk words of greeting, those male counselors snickering. Why did you come here? The risks back home are far more tempting right about now.

Your nose catches the scent first, the sound of the person's shoes hitting ground second. Clad in this overly musky scent that seems to glide itself across the air, a rapturous, creamy silk-like voice hits the atmosphere and flips you head over ass.

"Dibs."

Your mom is snapping back with her wit, shoving her crate into his hands and moving away from his speechless face to leave you visible. Standing still, your box seemingly heavy, body light, you can't but help yourself to a heaping serving of observation. His pants are tan, or white, belt tightly securing those defined hips, his sneakers stretched over long feet (don't they say long feet mean... okay then, holy fuck), and sea-foam green muscle tank that leaves nothing to the imagination, except how much leverage you'd have to straddle his chest...

"And this is Y/N. She's joining us with her mother, whom is Chef Bertie. She won't be bunking with the ladies, however. But I still expect of all you to get along and make her feel apart of things, as she will also be partaking in counselor duties for the summer." Margaret's voice interjects, right smack into your looking into this guy's angelically crafted face.

You can't see what color his eyes are over his designer frames, just blue hued glimpses reflected off California sunshine. His plump lips are wet with amusement and surprise at your reveal, jaw sharp and alert, so arching and shaped it can cut through glass. There's a small cross dangling from his left ear, his hair is frosted at the top. He looks like some guitarist that has actual angel wings. His arms are steady, hands big.

You can swear there's a saxophone player somewhere playing a soundtrack for this very moment. You kind of, no, record SCRATCH that, you definitely need to find a seat somewhere and pour a glass of ice water over your head. For a fleeting moment you think you might need to attempt Olympic running towards the infirmary, cause this is some sort of General Hospital soap opera scene. You can't stop yourself from how you do react though. Biting your upper lip, eyes dashing mad all across his body, you're engulfed in more than the summer California heat.

You see the metal of his silver cross earring catch the light, and you know that even God himself can't help you now. Looking at this man in the blue shirt, you feel as if you've committed a lifetime of the most blood deep sins. You feel the need to ask Margaret to save you in the lake, some prayer needing to happen before you feel anymore guilt for objectifying this stranger. What feels like never-ending hours is merely a minute at most, making you look even more awkward and ignorant. Margaret does save you this time, introducing each counselor, the sensual blue eyed boy called Xavier Plympton, to your amusement, then with a seemingly arrogant grin on her peach painted lips, demands you take Xavier and the other two attractive male counselors - Ray and Chet, to finish carrying the crates of fruit and eggs to the kitchen pantry.

A dying 'hi' towards the friendly faces of the group is all you muster, rolling a shoulder back to the truck for the boys to take the hint. Xavier already has his share from what your mom gave him, so it's quick work for the other two. You don't talk, don't look at any of them on the way into the large dining area and back into the kitchen where your mom is hard at work. All the guys pile beside you, so you figure that now is the time to find your damn voice box and activate its fucking switch.

"You can just leave the stuff here, guys. Some of the other staff is in charge of stocking it anyways. They're real particular on everything, you know? We appreciate your help!" You ramble on, eyes widening when you spot Xavier - shades now clipped to his collar - smirking at you, pearly whites gleaming tauntingly.

Everyone, yourself included, all discard your food onto the chipped wooden counter. You fold your hands into fists on its hard surface, knuckles pressing together, lips pinched tight, feeling this tickle attack you from the tips of your toes and back, leaving you absolutely parched and winded both.

"So you're the Chef's daughter, huh?" Ray is the first to speak to you.

You turn to his direction to see him leaning a few feet beside you, propped against the end of the countertop by his elbow. His smile is genuine, calm, excited even.

He must really have wanted to be here this summer.

"Yeah." Is your proud response. Your mom is a hard worker with a zero tolerance policy for bullshit or dumbasses, so you're very proud to call yourself her child.

"Kind of a given you'd be here with her, right? That's cool. Most kids wouldn't volunteer their time to help their Mama at some sweaty ass camp in the middle of nowhere. You even gettin' anything in return from this?" Ray questions again.

Your body warms a little, not used to this duration of a conversation, let alone by someone this cute, this cool, who seems nice enough. You find yourself softening towards his presence, friendly and open in your answers.

"She'll share whatever she makes with me, so it's a win win. I have to clean the camp, so I'll also pull in my own money, then we put it all together. Living in LA is fucking expensive."

"Wait-" Chet cuts in. "You still live with your mom? Aren't you in your twenties or some shit? Don't you have any plans back home?"

Yup, there it is.

You were expecting some sort of snide commentary from at least someone in this group. You're unsure how to answer. It's not that your lifestyle is something you're ashamed of, it's just that you're beyond sick and tired at the ridicule it brings. Your mood is deflated, head bowing a little at Chet's laughter. Maybe it's not malicious, but to you, it isn't funny either.

"At least she didn't blow a chunk of cash on condoms and cheap ass cologne to impress Brooke. No one likes a cocky counselor, Chet." Sounds to your left.

Ray snorts into his hand, easing back at Xavier's biting remark. Your jaw becomes unhinged with a loud giggle that makes Xavier lick his tongue across the top edge of his teeth. He's super focused on you, sharing this knowing that eases and unsettles you all at once. Ray and Chet begin a bicker at Chet's expense, Xavier continuing to watch you in a similar fashion as you were observing him earlier. The floor feels like lava under your feet, your legs jello.

"Better get back outside, kids. Boss lady will be getting impatient." Your mom's helper speaks to you from the kitchen.

You give him a nod, trance broken. Moving one foot in front of the other is hard, but you get it right, breezing past Xavier and the rest, right back into the summer heat wave.

~*~

After the conversation your mom directed over her history with this Camp and her current decision to return, Margaret invited you to tour the grounds again with everyone else after formal introductions were completed. You weren't going to disagree, not with the possibility of sneaking looks in Xavier's way, hearing the things that came from his perfect mouth. You're fucking sickening, like some dingbat ditz on a sugar high that's having an affair with lust. The whole tour was boring and subpar, but worth it to see Xavier in action. Margaret stops everyone outside the cabin with, in your opinion, the finest views, to preach her rules onto everyone.

You're cringing, already choking on heaps of unshed laughter and snorts. Everyone but Brooke seems to be amused. Brooke seems the most like you, so it's a comfort. Xavier has his debate locked and gone, metaphoric smoke trailing behind of his tongue, following his words like a steaming mug of honey-hot tea. After his fist bump with Ray he makes sure to give a nodding little grin your way.

A bashful smile colors your mouth.

"Y/N is true to her pure body, to herself, to the Lord. She hasn't polluted it with the perversions of today, have you, sweetheart?" Margaret's voice is that bucket of ice water you could've used earlier.

You have to grab onto the other side of the doorway to keep it together, your heartbeat in your throat. How in the fuck does she know what you do, or for that damned matter, if you've done anyone before? The entirety of everyone's attention is on you now. Your eyes are sharp on Margaret's, her joy apparent. You see right through her bullshit.

She can read people, and she's just used that to her very public advantage.

Whatever. Fuck her.

"I don't know how you’d know about my personal life, or why it matters towards the situation of a damned summer camp, Miss Booth." You snap, cheeks hot with anger, neck flushed with adrenaline. 

Her head twitches as if she's some robotic experiment in a lab, but she catches herself, a plastered on smile melting back into place. "Damned is the farthest thing from the grounds on which this Camp sits, Y/N. And as for your earlier inquiry? I have known your mother for half of my adult life, so that means I also know you."

You're in place, still stunned. How does knowing your mom have anything to do with Margaret knowing you're a virgin? It's not something your mom would broadcast to anyone. Luckily, it's a dropped topic. You're given looks you expect, especially by Chet and Montana. Ray and Brooke, who stops to turn around and give a compassionate smile, are the more sympathetic and understanding.

That leaves... him. You're petrified to turn and see his cliché reaction. He doesn't say anything, not at first, only moving past you. But when stops, a partial pivot, there's an almost relieved expression on his face. The breeze picks up a little, making you brush a lock of escaped hair from your messy style.

The grass and dirt crunches under his weight as he approaches you, stopping a decent distance. You can't breathe, can't comprehend anything out of this shared airspace. The wind has the little cross swaying against his lobe, his lips are plump, the blue in his eyes darkening to the shadows of the summer shade. There's rain on the air. It's going to rain tonight.

"You know I teach at an exercise studio in Los Angeles, Y/N? I'm good at helping people learn."

So he's baiting me to come to his gym with my fat body? Prolong the shame?

You want to further scold yourself for thinking he'd be anything but a shallow Hollywood hottie. Typical.

Before the tears even make themselves form, Xavier is moving closer. You don't stop him, don't take the out his slow and respectful pace is giving you. He's tilting in a little more so that wisp of frosted hair brushes your nose, his breath warm and minty.

"A virgin, huh? I guess it works out that I'm a teacher."

[indieks]

Two Nights, One Da(y)te 🌒 Lee Jooheon | 1.5/2

🔥 Pairing : Lee Jooheon x Reader

🔥 Genre : Soulmate!AU, Angst, Fluff, Suggestive (light)

🔥 Word count : 25.3k

🔥 Synopsis : He should have been just another Tinder match you would have swiped off your life just like you swiped your thumb on your screen that night, hadn’t it been for the deep connection that bonds you to him. He is your soulmate, you are a girl he can’t help but get attracted to. You are seeking for the perfect relationship, he is trying to stay away from love. Would the few times you come across each other be enough for your opposite hearts to face the same direction?

Part 1 /\ Part 1.5 /\ Part 2

🔥 A/N : I don’t know where I should begin... I’m so relieved to finally be able to publish the sequel of this story, but I’m so sorry at the same time for being this late. My past year (I can’t believe it’s already been a year) has been hectic and busy, my studies being the most intensive and time-solliciting ever. But I’ve managed to type a few words here and there, to finally come up with this part ; and no, it isn’t the ending one like I had planned to, because I had so many things to tell that it would’ve been too long, so I had to cut it into two!

Anyway, I just wanted to thank every single one of you who’ll take the time to read this, especially if there are some of you who were still waiting... I’ve missed Tumblr and I hope you’ll like it!

Disclaimer : the few new named characters I’ve introduced are purely fictional, I’ll just let your imagination be!

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"You're dozing off, again" a low voice finally snaked its way into his closed eardrums that had muted any possible sound buzzing around him, letting his messy thoughts rule over his focus and his awareness of where he actually was.

Jooheon snapped his head towards the left to peak at his interlocutor, being met by his bartender colleague's sad smile, Wonwoo, who shook him lightly as he had landed a friendly hand on his shoulder.

"You should take a break" he then suggested to the reddish-haired boy who looked back at him like a deer caught in the headlights.

"W-What? No, I'm fine, I'm sorry I just… Got a lot on my mind lately" Jooheon then brushed his offer off with a forced smile of his and a gentle nod to ask for his understanding and forgiveness.

"Hyung, I've been taking over your third customer because you've left the counter to take a bottle of vodka like five minutes ago yet never came back" Wonwoo chuckled, releasing the tensed muscles of the man next to him from his grasp.

"Five? No kidding? Wow shit I'm so sorry" Jooheon apologized again before sighing, his now squinted eyes meeting his own reflection in the glasses that were plastered behind the rows of bottles at the back of their bar.

The night club's neon-lights painted his face in warm colors, contrasting with how pale and  expressionless it had been for weeks now. He looked miserable in spite of the fancy hairstyle he had put effort in and his attempt to feel confident by opening his shirt a little bit too much for the ladies – in vain, as his mind wasn't even here to actually catch them lurking.

"It's okay hyung, I can see you're going through hardships lately. So if you need to take a small break, go ahead, you'll pay me back later" his tall friend reassured him before turning back to their counter where a crowd of thirsty people was already asking for his services.

Jooheon's knuckles that had indeed been around the bottle of alcohol he had indeed intended to bring back to the front weren't fed with blood anymore as his clench tightened around it. He was confused as hell, hell he thought he had already been living in all this time but which seemed to have darkened and deepened with discomfort ever since he had sent that very message to you and you had had the last word.

He could almost recite your answer by heart aloud, as he had come to read and reread it, the words planting swords of doubt, regret, and want in his body. And if he had managed to push it aside most of the time by busying himself with work at the club or on some music, it only took one glimpse of your face flashing randomly through his head from time to time, for him to get blocked into a quicksand of thoughts about you, about his feelings, about his choices, and his mind would be on full stop just like it had now.

But five minutes straight… Wow, that was a record.

You [00:44 a.m.] : I'm alone at my place, so now I have nothing to distract me anymore… I shall finally muster up my courage after hours of thinking about what to actually say. I don't know if I'm mad, upset, frustrated. Maybe a mix of them three. I'm sorry if I'm bothering you with a heavy block of words but I'll just let it all out. I spent a wonderful night with you last time. And as I told you back then, I like you, and I'm sorry. I like you and I can't do anything about it, I'm almost bothered by it myself, because you kind of warned me about your issues. Maybe I was the only one feeling this way, but that night was really special to me, and that independently of the fact that you're my ideal. Special enough for me to stop thinking about what should come next, which is sooo unlike me. And I thought I had somehow convinced you to do just the same, appreciating that thing between us. Between us, yes, as in from me to you, but also from you to me, because I felt like it wasn't one-sided. I shall thank you for trying to explain yourself again and your decision, but I'm having a hard time understanding why everything that had apparently made you come to me suddenly disappeared, or why it wasn't enough again for you to let things unwrap on their own and see where we would end up. See, I told you, I'm not enough, not even for my soulmate haha ! Anyway, I'll have to respect your decision because I can't do anything about it, right?"

Everything had gone well that night. Jooheon hadn't felt the time run out through his fingers wrapped around your waist, molding perfectly against your skin as if they had been supposed to land just there. Everything had gone so well, that he had thought he would finally be able to overcome his insecurities, as the way you had freed him from his knots of thoughts and his heavy shell had definitely showcased how special you were, reason why he had made a move first the afternoon following your leave and started a conversation.

However, the time with you and the messages you had exchanged had only been a suspension of the weight crushing his heart, and not its eradication. Because soon, the ghosts of Jooheon's lack of trust in himself had come back floating around him ; he had then realized he still felt betrayed too much to finally draw his sword and fight them, and chase the light you had shone on him.

Yet, why turning away from you was continuously bugging him even after three weeks of cutting ties? He missed your daily chatting, he missed your reassuring presence, and he somehow missed your touch and your lips. With just an encounter, a night next to him, and some text messages 'til the morning light, you had lodged a bullet right at his heart and the wound was spreading your print through his whole body. And now, it was as if he had run away, but with his eyes looking back at you all the while ; with the strings pulling at his bloody organ held by your hands ; with his mind paused back in that past night with you, unable to make him sort what was supposedly waiting for him onwards.

He had made this choice with the conviction that he still needed some time alone to go ahead with his life and mostly sort it out, but right now, what was left in front of him was only a battlefield of endless question marks, blocking his vision of where he should land his next footsteps away from the crossroad where his path had met yours.

Shit, he was regretting.

"Why did you change your mind, all of a sudden?" Kihyun asked him as Jooheon had ended up taking a short break with the encouragement of his colleague, and he had joined his group of friends who were sitting down at one of the fancy tables in the club.

They had been avoiding the subject for a while now as they knew how sensitive the bartender could be ; however, as the latter showed them how uneasy he felt about his decision himself to the point it had now impeached him from working correctly, Kihyun hadn't been able to hold it in any longer.

"What do you mean" Jooheon mumbled nonchalantly as he poured himself a glass of soda from one of the bottles of soft drinks they had spared.

"You told us that everything had went well that Friday night. I hadn't seen you smile like that when receiving a text for ages. So what happened, Jooheon-ah?" the boy specified, a worried expression clear on his face as his brows were furrowed and his little eyes were shining.

"In other words : why did you pee on yourself?" Changkyun tackled his friend intently, so that he'd gain a reaction from the zombie he had been all over again as if they were back when she had left him – and maybe, as a bonus, a spontaneous answer.

Bingo.

"Would you leave me alone, please? I feel like my head's gonna explode from all the overthinking about this already, so no need to add your questions to it, thanks!" Jooheon barked back at them, gulping down a huge sip from his glass before smashing it down on the table with a trembling hand.

The beverage was refreshing, but what he needed right now, were the flames of liquor to burn his insides so that he wouldn't feel them twisting anymore.

"Hey, we're trying to help here, calm down" Hoseok, one of the players of his ex-football team, warned with a hurt frown.

"Wanna know what I think?" Minhyuk spoke up, and he got an eye-roll in return.

"Actually, not that much…?" Jooheon tiredly inquired, because he knew what was about to come out of the blonde's mouth.

"I know you like the back of my hand Jooheon-ah, and what I'm sure of, is that you simply chickened out because you like the girl. And right now, you're having a headache, because you're just admitting it to yourself yet you don't know if you do want to take the proper actions that go with it, or not. I told you, that your heart doesn't give a damn about what's settled in your head" Minhyuk ignored his answer and looked him in the eye, unphased by the angry glare the fiery-haired boy shot right at him. "And while you're at it with your overthinking, just ask yourself the right questions : Did I enjoy the time I spent with her? Yes or no. Would I like it if I see her again? Yes or no. Do I wish to talk to her? Yes or no. Did I like kissing her? Would I like it if it happens ever again? Yes or no. If everything's a yes, then let me answer for you : maybe putting an end to it wasn't the best of choices, no."

"Leave me alone with your psychanalysis" Jooheon barely replied through gritted teeth, hating how that friend of his always managed to nibble right at the sensitive spot.

"We're just seeing that you're not… As okay with your decision as you've been when you had stories with no tomorrow up 'til now. And I think it's a shame that you're letting your doubts take the best of you like that, because Y/N really is a great girl and I swear she's really into you-" Kihyun started, but he got interrupted by Jooheon standing up roughly.

"I've had enough."

"Jooheon-ah, wait" Hyunwoo, the eldest of the group, got up on his feet as well in an attempt to prevent him from leaving.

"Aren't you supposed to be the ones to understand me and cut me some slack the most? You know how fucked up my mind is, you know how hard it is for me to find a solution to that blocking, you know ALL OF THAT! I've listened to you, I've tried to let myself go, but I just can't, okay?! See in what it resulted! I hurt a nice person, and I'm going crazy because I don't know why I can't make it work out this time as well!" he burst out and once he did, his eyes grew wide as a wave of guilt crashed against his head walls.

He regretted having taken his buried frustration at them. Hyunwoo took that opportunity to grab him by the nape as the boy's head had dropped in shame, before he presented under his nose the rest of the glass he hadn't finished but with a hint of whiskey he had poured in it, a gesture of comfort Jooheon had needed instead of the lecturing and review of his love-life.

"This time it's definitely different, you like her, and maybe that's why you're even more scared. But we just think this could actually be the way out of it, your attraction to her. If only you had hung to that a little bit more… Anyway, sorry, I didn't mean to anger or hurt you" Minhyuk stepped towards his buddy, giving him a brief hug, before he left to get himself a strong drink at the bar.

If only Jooheon was brave enough to hold onto the rope you had caught him with, yes. If only the fight with his mind was that simple, yes. If only he hadn't already forfeited, yes…

*

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*

"You're dozing off, again" Jiwoo whispered from her seat facing you, her two eyes peeking at you over the thin panel between your two desks, and you blinked rapidly to bring yourself back to reality.

That poor, lonely, empty, reality you had been breathing in for three weeks now but that was suffocating you, as all the words you wished to tell him and all the ones you regretted having said were stuffed at the back of your throat.

So that was how it was supposed to feel, having bathed in the perfect world of soulmates only to drown in loneliness then harshly dry if it ever came to an end? You felt totally, inevitably, unbearably lifeless, your soul being trapped into the wonderful moment you had spent in his company but that you had a hard time labelling as a simple "good memory" now that everything was over. It was as if his lips on yours had taken all of your willpower to remain careful when it came to love, as you felt now tenfold worse than after your past breakups.

All of your usual imagination and enthusiasm had been swept away by your emotions that got the best of you, as Jooheon had stepped on the last thing that had implicitly kept you going with your life confidently after your previous heartbreaks : hope. You had hoped to find happiness in him, you had hoped that his smiles at you, his wish for you to stay, his sweet and deep kiss in the morning, his hands lingering around your frame as you had told him you had to go, his messages popping up on your screen afterwards, were the signs that you may have found some arms to engulf you ; but he had proven you wrong with his change of mind, or maybe, to your despair, his change of heart.

Once again, the power of feelings hadn't been enough for you to keep him by your side, for him to come to you fearlessly, for the both of you to enjoy the ride and see where it would take you, blindly. And because the law was a witch that had casted an awful spell on you, you got to experience the weighing sensation of melancholy as you couldn't help but think of him.

A raindrop would make you think of him, as the shape of his mouth made it seem as if he had a small one always hanging from his lower lip. The sound of a car passing by, as it reminded you of the numerous taxis you had tried to stop before you had decided to take yourselves home by feet. The dimples of one of your colleagues, as his were the cutest you had ever seen. The scent of beer or dumplings, as it was the first – and last – late night snack you had shared with him. The orange and red lights at a stop, as the strands of his hair were tinted between those very two colors.

Anything in your daily sight of banalities managed to link itself to a memory of Lee Jooheon, and every time, it was another sigh leaving your mouth. Funnily though, it somehow helped you to understand how hard it could be for him to move on from his ex and let his heart beat for anyone but her, as for now, you felt like you couldn't give yours to anyone but him, and that until a long long time.

He was your ideal type of man, and unfortunately, he had also made your heart flutter. He matched your dreams and the reality of your feelings, and it hurt, pretty badly. The bittersweet taste of what you barely could call a relationship dried your mouth that only craved for his to grace it all over again with sweet kisses and caresses of his tongue inside of its walls.

"Stop checking your messages" Jiwoo guessed as she spotted how your eyes were lingering down on something on your desk, and you almost whined as your lips formed a pout.

"Remember what the cards told me last week? That he probably would text me…" you retorted shamelessly.

"This application is bullshit and you know it, and it told you that he might think of sending you something, not that he would actually do it in the end" your colleague countered in a sigh.

"You remember quite well for someone who's so sceptic about astrology and so on…" you chuckled and she tsk-ed at you.

"It was funny because we were drunk" she admitted with a shrug, before regaining a stern composure. "More seriously, Y/N, I'm sorry to tell you this but it's been three weeks already… I know he's your ideal, but it doesn't mean he's the absolute perfect man you need for real, y'know? Life goes on, and as you've always told me, true love always wins! I'm just sad to see you still like this!"

You addressed her a smile as you saw how hard she was trying to reason you, but the you who had been so reasonable those past months, was long gone and replaced by a desperate girl in need for a romantic-comedy-like unfolding to happen in her life. In the movies, he would actually send you the message ; he would have been thinking of you in his bed until late late night ; he would have realized that he…

That he liked you. If he ever did.

Your heavy eyelids that supported a lazy gaze fluttered tiredly as you turned your head to the window showcasing a lining of buildings warmed up by the setting sun that hadn't fought with any cloud during the day, as if it was laughing at your gloomy state.

"Yes I'll send it to you next morning" a sweet but clear voice caught your attention from the other side of the room, and your heart did a small jump as you shifted in your seat to catch a sight of Yoo Kihyun entering the open space with a phone stuck between his ear and his shoulder, and his eyes suddenly fell on you, his face then breaking into the most welcoming of smiles.

You adored him. He was a hard working senior who was straight in his shoes, never failing at his tasks, always ready to help, always giving his opinion in the subtlest of ways, always supporting your projects ; he was kind of your mentor at work, while Jiwoo was your right arm, and if usually meeting with him every day was pure happiness, now you couldn't help but get strangled by the hands of questions about Jooheon every time Kihyun would look at you or talk to you. He was the most vivid yet most embarrassing of remaining links between you and your ideal, and for three weeks you had had to bite your lip so that you wouldn't blurt your wonderings to him out of nowhere.

How was he doing? Had he talked about you? Had he forgotten about you? Were you crazy to hope and wait for anything to happen, deep down?

The after-effects of the spell were definitely chewing on the lucid part of your brain.

"Don't distance yourself from me because of Lee Jooheon" the cause of your stomach's knots to tighten at work quietly told you as you were waiting for your coffee to be spilled by the machine near the blocks of desks.

"W-What?" you stuttered, surprised by his so-on-point remark. "I-I'm not, I’m not Kihyun, what does make you say that? It's fine between us!"

The latter chuckled, his eyes disappearing as his mouth curled up, and you would've bet that he could cook some eggs on your two cheeks that were steaming from the mortification he had put you in.

"You know you can talk to me about it, if you need to… I can see that it's been running on your mind" he offered in a soothing tone, and you both went to sit on the comfortable sofas located in what was supposed to be the rest area. "But please, don't be embarrassed with me!"

"How can I not be? He's your friend before anything else, and you are the first spectator of how ridiculous I'm being nowadays… I don't want to put you into a tricky position. It was one night, and it's over" you convinced yourself before sipping on your hot energizing drink, and Kihyun landed his face in the palm of his left hand, a fond smile spreading on his traits just for you to see.

"You're not as convincing when you talk about yourself as when you're selling our projects" he joked, and you faked a kick in his legs extended before yours. "You don't have to try to look all strong in front of me Y/N, I'm actually dating my own ideal and I know how devastating it feels if they ever turn away from you."

There was a glimpse of sadness in his eyes you had never seen before as Kihyun was either smiling, either completely unreadable at work, his face expressions only shifting from concentrated traits to joyful ones when he heard good news. But sadness? Never had you ever spotted him break in front of you in the few months you had spent together, and God knew how late you had stayed together in the building to finish your work, how drunk you had both been, how tired the job could make you.

"You weren't hers, as well?" you questioned before you could think of how intrusive this could sound.

"I am, but we took a break for a few months because the emotions and sensations were… Too much for her and for me to handle. We were quite passionate from the very beginning, so much that it could have torn us apart" he explained.

You nodded understandingly, your fingernails tapping an unknown beat on the small plastic cup in your cold hands.

"Now everything's fine, but just so you know that I've been through it, dreading the ideal one, so I get how you feel" he added, insisting on the last word with his eyes looking at you intently, as if they were also bearing the weight of it.

"Well at least you stopped dreading her because you were meant to be together anyway! Jooheon and I aren't as lucky, I just hope it won't take too long for me to move on" you smiled enviously at him before coating your lips with some hot coffee to mask how quickly the corners of your mouth had fallen down.

"You know, what's funny…" Kihyun trailed, passing his hand through his thick mop of brown hair that was graciously welcoming the last rays of sun seeping through the bay windows.

He bit back a chuckle when he caught how your eyes lightened up at the suspense he had voluntarily seamed between the both of you, finding you cute, and confirming his already steady opinion : Jooheon and you would be perfect together, if only…

"What's funny, is that Jooheon is supposed to be my friend first, so I should support him and respect his choices, but this time, I'm definitely on your side" he confessed, his eyes turning into crescents as his mouth supported a warm smile once more.

"Oh yes? And why's that?" you asked him with a dubitative expression as you leaned back into the comfy chair. "Glad to learn that you and I are not friends though…"

Kihyun's phone suddenly rang, and he held the screen towards you so that you could read the name of one of your collaborators, actually being the one you were going to work with on the next event.

"They have your personal number? Woooow you're so chic" you whispered with a faked astonished expression as he stood up quickly, chuckling at your remark.

"Let's talk about it around drinks tonight, I feel like going to the bar instead of finishing what I have to do" he smiled before exiting the relaxing room in pressed strides, and you could hear him getting back to his work-tone as he seriously said "Yes sir it's me, Yoo Kihyun".

Little did you know he was literally going to replace his blood by alcohol once night had fallen, and that you would follow him with just a few drinks late.

*

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*

You were sitting at your favorite bar, that was located only three blocks away from your workplace. All of your team could never get enough of its cozy ambiance, with the dangling little garlands and lanterns hanging from the ceiling, the numerous tropical plants placed between the row of tables, and the exotic landscapes sketches or Maya-like sculptures fixed on the wooden walls, giving the overall feeling of having found shelter in the middle of a sublime jungle.

It had started as another classical end of day, Kihyun and you enjoying some delicious appetizers and tricky cocktails that were as tasty as threatening for your sanity, all the while talking about futile things and sharing funny stories. However, sooner than you would have imagined, you weren't clinking your half-empty glass with your favorite partner when you agreed on things anymore, because it had been already ten minutes since he was ranting about life and love with a jaded expression on his sharp traits.

He wasn't even looking at you, his lost eyes fixed on a wooden stick which used to support candies he had now planted in the glass in front of him, and he turned it again and again into the rest of his drink mixed with water from the cooling ice cubes.

"You know, when you date your ideal, you almost forget how it actually feels to love at first. I swear, the sensations you get almost turn into a drug, something you can never get enough of! You immediately love the person without even knowing him or her, and you're in such a bliss, in such an awe, that you can't even distinguish what your real emotions are anymore. It took me a break with my girlfriend to look back on what I feel, what I love in her, and to miss her but because my heart felt empty, not my entire self."

He sighed loudly before taking a sip from his striped straw, and seeing how he frowned and tilted his head, you knew he had more to say, which was so unlike him. It seemed as if your own situation with Jooheon affected him as well ; as if it had opened the doors to some secret yet deep thoughts that had been bugging his mind.

"When you're in a one-sided situation like yours, I feel like there's a lot to it. I think that it's also a perfect combination in its own way, because there's the power of soulmates, facing the one of true feelings. Two paths come across and merge into one : the one of the heart, and the one of fate, this is complementary" he then explained as his digits lightly traced the two lines in the palm of his left hand, and strangely, his words seemed to have cooled down the atmosphere around you as you felt chills run down your skin all of a sudden.

"I used to agree with you and believe in love more than in the soulmate-thing, but… You can't deny that nothing can beat the perfection of the romance between two individuals that were both bond by fate. It means they're made for each other, it's beautiful" you inquired, and unlike you whose heart now felt heavy in your itchy chest, Kihyun looked like he relaxed in his chair as it was his turn to speak again.

"But what sticks two soulmates together is also love, just like any other couple. What we actually feel might be stronger, but not purer. If I didn't love my girlfriend and if she didn't love me, our short break would have resulted in a break-up, for sure. That's the part of reality in this world of dreams and expectations. I wish Jooheon would understand that…" he breathed out as his gaze finally landed on you, an exasperated expression veiling his white face.

"Oh no, don't tell me he's back at it again" a rather high-toned voice spoke from behind you and your colleague's reddening cheeks spread into a contented smile, so you turned around in your seat to be met with five familiar figures, their sight making your heart drop down to your heels.

Before you had even recovered from the tornado of emotions this situation was putting you through, the boys you couldn't help but label as "Jooheon's friends" dragged some more chairs and tables to join Kihyun and you. To each beat of your weakened heart, one thought kept on ringing in your mind : every single boy sitting next to you, in front of you, across from you, knew Lee Jooheon better than you did even though the law made you feel otherwise. But what was harder to process, was they surely were aware of the things that had happened between the both of you, making you rot in embarrassment.

"What, what, what? I'm back at what, huh? You know you all agree, Jooheon doesn't realize how lucky he is! What he trusted in is right in front of our eyes, Y/N, who aspires to believe in love more than anything! He's not her ideal for nothing, it's because they would be perfect together, am I wrong?"

You swore that the weight of awkwardness and how the atmosphere had thickened were crushing you in your wooden chair, and all you did was agitating your head from the left to the right repeatedly while shooting him a pleading look so that he would stop playing the justiciary.

"Hey, you're lucky too you punk! Sorry Y/N, he tends to turn really sentimental once he's drunk… Anyway, we're here to save you from hell" the one you remembered as being named Hoseok smiled kindly at you, however it didn't chase your wish to disappear away.

"What are you saying, you're here because I texted you to come" Kihyun snorted with a sulky face.

He hadn't asked for your advice or assent before taking this questionable initiative, but you had noted from the mischievous smile he had sported on the way earlier that he had been exceptionally excited to go out, making you wonder if he had been up to something.

And he clearly had.

"I thought it would be nice for you to hang with some new people, to clear your mind a little" he then addressed you, and every single one of you – except for him– rolled your eyes at his stupid idea.

Clear your mind? While being surrounded by six faces that only reminded you of the one that was missing? Seriously?

What a nice idea he had had, bringing another set of pieces to the puzzle picturing Jooheon in your dizzy head, bringing dozens of questions burning the tip of your tongue, bringing discomfort as you were hanging with an important part of his life when he had chased you out of it.

"I texted the sad boy too, so that he realizes what he's missing, I can't leave him alone being all dumb like that" Kihyun then proudly announced, and you darted two big round eyes at him, your heart beating faster than it had since the night you had spent with the very sad boy he was talking about, as for three weeks it had been unmoved.

"ARE YOU CRAZY?!" you shouted along with the rest of the boys, your pupils then exchanging panicked-angry-incredulous glances.

"I'm leaving" you then precipitated yourself, your suddenly trembling hands gathering your things on the table and putting them back into your leather bag.

"Yoo Kihyun seriously what's wrong with you…" the tall one, Hyungwon, pestered him with a clenched jaw as he looked at you who were ready to stand all at once.

"He will be here in less than a minute, just stay and trust me Y/N, please" Kihyun begged and it triggered you.

"Why would you do that? It's just embarrassing for the both of us! I am respecting his decision, and so should you! Thank you for worrying about me, but don't interfere anymore, please!" your tone would have gotten close to the one of yelling, hadn't it been for your voice cracking as it was the prey of your fear to meet Jooheon's eyes again, to read discomfort and resent in them instead of the memory of their tenderness you cherished.

Just as you were about to finally get up, having put your fluffy puffer coat on as well as your beanie to confront the icy weather, the peal of small bells signaling the opening of the main door resounded over the music and the boys' voices telling you how sorry they were ; and you knew. You knew it was him who had just entered, because your body automatically reacted the second you dared to throw a look over your shoulder quickly, your eyes only perceiving a reddish mop of hair and a bright yellow padded jacket. Your hand was scorching and shining around the handle of your bag, and you cursed under your breath at the pain and at Kihyun who bit back a smile of victory.

He really could become sly and clueless at the same time once he was drunk, how come you had forgotten about that?

"Y/N, wait-" the latter tried to hold you back as you pushed your chair that screeched against the ground, but you walked past the table, your hurried strides supported by your trembling legs taking you towards some other exit at the opposite side of the room.

Your heavy heart had turned light, floating under your chest as a feather would do in some spring breeze, however the two drinks you had consumed and the trap your friend had pushed you right in made you overall feel sick, your stomach burning. Some fresh air was even more welcomed, yet you hadn't even taken that much steps when the most pleasant voice you would ever hear infiltered your buzzing eardrums :

"Y/N" Jooheon called you out calmly, and your feet immediately stumbled as you came to a full stop.

Shit.

You didn't want to look at him, you didn't want to see his face again, you didn't want to feel yourself sucked into the hole of sweltering feelings for him once more now that you had told yourself that your dreams wouldn't come true ; however you did, slowly turning on your heels, and you inevitably got consumed by the flames of whatever his presence did to you.

He looked utterly handsome even though he was doing nothing, just standing there and breathing. His hair was down, falling messily on his forehead, with a few strands kissing his eyelids ; still, it didn't occult the power his pupils could hold. His sharp eyes never failed to get the best of you, absorbing your willpower to leave and pinning your two feet to the ground, as contrary to what you had dreaded, there wasn't anything near embarrassment shining in them. They were simply gazing at you, two black orbs full of stars hooked on his sculpted-like face, and they didn't quaver when they met your unsure, humid ones.

"Let's talk outside for a minute" he invited out of the blue, and you blinked obliviously but your head nodded independently of your command.

You then waited for him to move closer behind you before exiting the bar, without saying a word, your throat strained and your mouth itching with the desire of kissing him right here, right now. Once you had landed a few steps outside, it took you a lot of courage to turn around again and face the cause of your happiness and sorrow, the sweet-and-sour mixture twisting your stomach where butterflies still were doing their usual job of messing with you.

"Hi" you tried with a small smile, shoving your hands inside your pockets so that you wouldn't lose your fingers.

Jooheon wished the fog that came out of his mouth as he breathed out had conveyed all of his messy thoughts to you, so that you could feel how torn you had left him for three weeks, so that you would help him sort things out, so that you would absorb them just like you had that Friday night, as he didn't even know what he was supposed to say to you right now ; he had just wished to see your face, selfishly, even if it was only for a short and bittersweet moment.

"How have you been doing?" he then asked randomly, the words falling from his plump lips he then bit in regret.

Your world was spinning twice faster now that it was revolving around Jooheon as its center of gravity again ; you could only see and hear him, your senses all gathered to focus on his person. Nevertheless, if three weeks ago the enchantment casted upon you had made you feel happy, this time, your encounter was crackling further your heart he had closed his doors to.

"Fine, and you?" you lied, so bad, yet you didn't want him to feel worse than you knew he already was, as even if you were distraught because you had failed in a relationship once more, you couldn't ignore the fact that Jooheon was suffering from his disappointment more than anything.

Your heart understood him through its aching, reason why your voice's tone had been sweet despite you, warming Jooheon's own bloody organ in the matter of a millisecond, warmth that spread inside his limbs and made him insensitive to the actual freezing weather. Some snowflakes had started to fall and were finding home in the free strands of your hair, and his burning left hand was weirdly craving to caress the white gown they were creating over your head until it'd disappear.

"Pretty fine too" his low voice vibrated through his chest, and another cloud of steam formed between your two faces, giving you the time to collect your expression so that he wouldn't notice how flustered you were.

"Anything you wished to tell me? Or else I'll get going I have a bus to catch in… 10 minutes" you insinuated that he had called you out for something precisely, and when his eyes fell down to the snowy pavement, you crumpled the insides of your pockets as the longer he was standing in front of you, the harder it was to fight the urge to assault him with questions and… Kisses?

The silence was weighty, and when Jooheon's pupils leveled up to yours once again, he noticed the thin line of water that was forming at the crease of your eyelids, killing him on the spot. Just like her, the sight of him was making you sad and uneasy, and he hated himself for that. Still what he despised more, was that he was putting you through the same thing that had eaten him alive the past months. He wished you had never met him and had simply fallen in love with some random guy, not being helplessly attracted to him because of a stupid law.

"I wanted to apologize on behalf of my friends, I can see you were quite embarrassed… They truly can be dumbasses sometimes, so sorry" he found the excuse on the spot, his improvisation impressing himself.

"Oh it's okay, they already apologized. It was Kihyun, he thought he was… Doing something good, I guess? He just doesn't get our situation" you brushed off as your brows had furrowed due to his surprising revelation.

"And I guess I wanted to check if you were okay" he suddenly admitted in a low yet steady tone that shook you to the core.

"Well you must know how it is, you've been through it" you sounded harsher than wanted, however, you couldn't blame your inner self for getting more and more sensitive while facing him.

You were right. Jooheon was more of a punition to you than anything else ; he knew it because he had lived in this empty feeling up 'til now. But couldn't he try to make you feel any better?

"Look, I'll take that as an opportunity to tell you face to face that I truly am sorry for what I did to you so… Yeah I'm sorry Y/N. I really wish you'll find someone good for you, you deserve it-"

"Jooheon, I told you I got you" you cut him, and the whisper of his name coming out of your freezing lips tranquilized its owner instantly. "Don't misunderstand what Kihyun just planned, I wasn't aware that you were coming either. I'm sorry but… Hearing you apologize and inducing that everything's over another time… Makes it kind of weird, I'm embarrassed right now."

You had become upset, as you had felt some kind of disappointment fall over you all of a sudden. Upset for having expected something to change with the time passing by ; for having felt the spark of excitement replacing your anger towards your colleague as soon as Jooheon had called your name ; for receiving his words like a good slap all over again when you had been supposed to let go and accept the reality of rejection three weeks ago already. Why did you keep on hoping?

You could already hear Jiwoo's voice scolding you with an "I told you!".

"Oh- I'm-"

"Don't" you smiled sadly. "Remember when she said sorry to you, did it make you feel any better?"

Jooheon's face contorted in displeasure and regret, and he passed a tensed left hand through his fluid hair, the locks enlightened by his shimmering red scar caressing them, and he cursed himself with thousands of insults inside his head. What had he been thinking?

"Someone told me that if your ideal leaves you, it means that you're not good for anyone else. So hearing you wishing me to find someone else… Kind of reminds me of this" you chuckled while looking away.

"Shit Y/N I'm so sor-… I didn't mean it that way, I just thought that apologizing to you face to face rather than behind a screen was at least more appropriate, because I know how it is to go through this so I was hoping to… Shit I don't know anymore" his words fell precipitately out of his mouth, and another wave of threatening tears accrued at the corner of your eyes.

"You don't have to feel guilty, okay? You should try to make yourself more comfortable with your choice, or else… Or else I'm gonna think that something's going on when there's not" you pursued with the same nervous laugh, your eyes dropping to your shoes as you nibbled at your lower lip. "So please… Don't worry, and don't be too harsh on yourself."

It had been as if you had read his inner emotions like they were scribbled on his face, finding what he couldn't point out in his mind then formulate, and soothing him with words to counter those insecurities. You never failed to find the right buttons to push at, and to his despair, you skimmed the one of his doubts, making his heart throb at the idea of taking risks that flashed through his mind.

"How come you're worrying about me when I'm the one who hurt you" he wondered aloud, before gasping as he heard his own voice that had betrayed him.

Because you cared for him. Because you could feel his pain now that he was near, your heart constricted under your ribcage the more you could read the guilt in his eyes that were begging for any sign of your forgiveness. Because apparently, the law left you no choice but to empathize with him no matter what he did, even if it included leaving you behind.

"I guess you know the answer since you experienced it too" you simply managed to answer before you would break into a sob. "I'll get going."

Something felt off in the way your exchange ended, Jooheon was even less at ease to part ways. He had apologized, to ensure that you would hear the sincerity of his excuses and to see you accept them ; but didn't it look like he had been looking for his inner peace rather than yours?

He could recognize himself in your reaction, as it had been the one he had adopted back when she had repeated the word "sorry" to him. However, he had been unable to hear the authenticity in her excuses as, just like you, all that remained was that you and him were being left behind no matter how guilty the one who was bidding goodbye felt.

But Jooheon didn't want you to experiment that loneliness, nor wanted the bright you to ostracize itself from everyday pleasures that would have brought a smile on your face before him ; so as your eyes were turning away from him as well as your figure, he spoke up :

"Why don't you stay?"

You faced him again and the unquavering look he conveyed to you made your heart jump up to your throat, yet ready to drop down at any second.

"What?"

"I said… Why don't you stay?" he reiterated, then gulped down his anticipation that had burned his rushed tongue.

You batted your eyelashes involuntarily as the incredulity galloped its way through your brain once you had processed his words.

"W-Why would I? Why would you want me to?"

"Because the guys are funny and nice, and because I liked it when we hanged together, it was cool" he simply stated, his brows going up on his forehead as he showcased a shrug.

"Is this a way for you to tell me we should be friends…?" you then asked ; however you weren't sure of how you would react if he ever came to say "yes".

"It is my way to tell you you shouldn't leave because of my stupid ass when you could spend a good evening with some dorks to make you laugh" he retorted.

His eyes were shining with expectation and maybe mischief, a cocktail that sparked some excitement in you and tickled your limbs to the point you almost returned him a warm smile as you could see how bad he was trying to make up for what he did – or thought he did – to you.

"At least you acknowledge the fact that you're stupid" you managed to joke, earning a shy chuckle from him. "Thanks but no, actually I'm pretty tired and I'm glad I escaped this situation with Kihyun because I would have had a short night, when tomorrow we need to finish some project…"

Jooheon's hand caressed his nape slowly as he nodded in understanding, and this time he was the one feeling the ache of disappointment when he probably shouldn't. Indeed, it was easier to let go behind a mobile phone's screen ; but now that this wall of fake-confidence wasn't there to help playing the cool ones, Jooheon felt like you could see how torn he was when you were supposed to believe that he was okay with his own decision.

"Alright…" his words trailed as well as his gaze on you, to the point you shivered as if you had been naked under the snow falling above your two dizzy heads.

You had found the courage to turn away a second time, when a last thought popped up in your mind, thought your tongue felt obliged to convey to him who had remained in his spot, watching you take a few steps away on the pavement.

"Oh and Jooheon" you spoke up with a small smile over your shoulder. "Just start practicing football again already. I saw you at the futsal on Kihyun's Instagram stories two days ago and you looked… Really happy. I think… That's actually the first step you need to take, y'know, to feel better with yourself, then maybe with life in general?"

These had been the only images and news you had had of him during the past three weeks, and you just had remembered how he had glowed with serenity and simple joy as he had been filmed kicking the ball with his friends. This was the Jooheon you wished for him to be, this was the bright version of him you thought deserved to be on full-time display, this was the self-love you wished he could give himself when you couldn't do it for him anymore.

"Thanks Y/N you're… Literally a good person like it's crazy."

But not good enough, once again, you thought.

"Comforting the guy who did you wrong and so on…" he breathed out.

You cared for him, so much that you hadn't been able to leave him on that awkward note, so much that your quavering heart felt at ease to see his lips draw a shy smile as he seemingly had been touched by your kind advice.

"Bye, then" you almost whispered to end up this conversation that could turn up to something too emotional in no time.

Another goodbye, less sour yet not that sweet as you both parted ways not as lovers, neither as friends, just as two hurt people who couldn't speak their hearts and minds up but only feel how confused they were. And if you were entangled invisibly to each other by the red string of fate, you still had to separate ways another time, and you finally turned your back on him. It was as if you were walking against the current, your whole soul pulled back to him who was looking at that beautiful silhouette he should let go of without regrets, his umpteenth sigh still not conveying his doubts to you.

*

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*  

Kihyun was looking at you from the corner of his half-closed eyes, and you were hesitating between smashing his head or simply laugh at his evidently dull state.

"I-I'm sorry…" he finally blurted out in a hushed voice, and the chuckle that had lurked deep inside your throat escaped despite you.

"About what? Your conspiracy that got me cornered and facing your friend in an embarrassing way, or the fact that you're a zombie on the day when you're supposed to be helping our team by being productive?"

You were waiting with your back against the wall in front of the meeting room, your files safely guarded under your crossed arms that covered your chest trembling due to stress. Your mind had to be at its best condition all day long so that at the end of this brainstorming, your Project manager would be satisfied and no more worried about one of the next huge events you had been offered to organize.

"I guess both, I messed up pretty badly…" Kihyun regretted as he pinched his nose bridge and you couldn't prevent your eyes from rolling up before they dropped on his pale figure.

"Oh yes you did, you moron" you sighed. "I hope your performing brain will help us as usual, or else if I die by the hands of the manager, you're dying with me."

Your team partner laughed tiredly before nodding, his briefcase held tight in his hand that was shivering as well, because of the little night he had spent and the anticipation getting on his nerves. While New Year's Eve was right around the corner, your team had already been picturing itself in the next decade. You had been assigned to draft an event destined to celebrate the merge of two small but successful companies – a Korean and a Chinese one. They had contacted you so you'd make them dream in the early spring of 2020, and the burden was real as the more time passed by, the more you were building a reputation, and the less you could allow yourselves to do any mistake.

The few instructions you had been given were that the clients were seeking for something fancy enough, and that they wished to invite all their employees so that they could get to know each other and learn to work together on good terms for the future. And those exact good terms, mainly depended on the successful night you would offer them as well as the few sponsors and investors who had been put on the guest list, so that they would never be able to forget about it but mostly be convinced to stick to a firm that treated them well.

Thankfully for you – and hungover Kihyun –, the meeting went well as you had been more prepared than you thought you would be in the midst of the confusion that plagued over your brain. So prepared, that the third idea you had come up with of renting a boat earned the votes and the trust of your Project Manager who complimented you on this plan you had worked hard on ever since the end of the National Federation of Football's party.

You finally looked back on how you had devoted yourself to work in order to forget about your heartache, and thanked your determined spirit as it had definitely paid off. This event truly had been your loophole to escape, only for a few hours within a day though, from your sickening thoughts about your love life.

"Oh right, about the staff we will need on the boat, I heard from the Korean firm that they have special recommendations they want to discuss with us about before we actually call our partners" Himchan informed you. "There are some people they worked with for previous events and who they trust so they'd like to have them on that night as well.

*

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*

Three months-and-a-bit later.

 You should have taken a closer look at the pile of folders containing the-said wanted workers your project manager had then handed to you that morning instead of leaving it on your desk to welcome some dust, because you would have been less appalled on the D-Day, as you were about to face your big clients.

Kihyun, Jiwoo and you quietly sat in the largest and fanciest of rooms in your building, organizing your ideas and files before the grand meeting. Like every single time even if you should have gotten used to it, your heart was ravaging your ribcage with great kicks of its own, and you felt hot as if you were in August under the sun of Madrid, and not in mid-March. Finally, the main door opened and Himchan entered with a reassuring smile pulling his traits, shortly followed by the two communication managers of the companies as well as their respective secretaries, a young woman and man.

You had exchanged a lot of e-mails and phone calls with the assistants during the past weeks, so you could say that you were pretty excited to finally get to talk to them without the barrier of a digital screen. The girl had been full of energy and had always asked if you needed help, reminding you of yourself in a way, while the male secretary had been quite formal but you had perceived a real kindness between the lines.

Yet, as soon as your eyes met the ones of the latter who translated the Chinese greeting of his chief for your knowledge, your left palm was set on fire, with the famous pleasuring pain that itched your skin and illuminated your… Heart-line.

You gave him a shy smile as you guessed he felt it too, the situation quite embarrassing when you were meeting at your workplace with all the eyes to see and a huge deal to conclude, however you observed with excitement the quick changing of expression on his face, his pupils suddenly darkening and pinning you to your chair, his lips parting slightly before he bit the lower one for a short moment, and his cheeks and ears reddening in no time.

Don't tell me…

He finally greeted you with a polite bow before taking place in the seat exactly facing yours, and you could read in his rushed attitude that he was flustered. While your team manager was delivering his speech, the guy started translating in real-time, mumbling the words while bending closely to his boss, who nodded and smiled as he progressively understood he was welcomed and thanked for having put his trust in your company.

You used his busy state as an opportunity to have a longer look at the figure of a new compatible man with you, and you could say you were quite flattered as the first word that came to mind to describe him was-

"Handsome. He's freaking handsome. You've been mailing this handsome guy, wow, your luck is real Y/N" Jiwoo whispered to your attention, quietly enough so you'd be the only one to hear that cringy remark and you nodded absent-mindedly, a smirk making its way to the corners of your mouth.

That handsome man was compatible with you, how lucky you were, indeed. He had chestnut blonde hair, slicked back and parted neatly with probably some wax, and his facial features were dangerously close to perfect. An angular nose, almond shaped eyes, thick and straight eyebrows, a peachy appealing mouth which covered an aligned dentition he finally showcased as he beamed at you once he had worded his name :

"Good morning, my name is Qian Jie, nice to meet you all."

"And I'm Jeon Jiwoo" your colleague pressed while passing a hand in her hair, and you had to sew your lips so that you wouldn't cackle before her childish behavior.

"I'm Y/L/N Y/N, nice to finally meet you too."

His eyes fell on your face once again and you were sure this time he was blushing, either because his grey turtleneck under his dark anthracite costume was too hot now that he wasn't braving the wind outside ; either because, just like you a month ago, he was staring at…

His ideal.

It was your turn to blush at this absurd idea and you shook your head from the left to the right to reason yourself ; the world was little, but this just couldn't be.

"I'm Jang Sora, I'm glad to meet you all as well, and to see you again, Kihyun" a feminine voice resounded in your ears and you finally paid attention to the woman secretary who was smiling at you then at your colleague who suddenly looked flustered.

"I'd never imagined we'd meet again under these circumstances" Kihyun nodded.

"You two know each other?" your manager asked enthusiastically.

The dark-haired girl chuckled, eyes with a single eyelid shining as if they had taken a ray of sun outside to illuminate them in a light brown, then she spoke up again :

"Yes, we happened to hang together a while ago, friends of friends!"

Kihyun was hanging his head low, and you could decipher how he forced a smile as he obviously was swimming under a sea of discomfort. Who was she to put the unwavering Yoo Kihyun in such a state? She definitely looked charismatic, young but surely experimented, just like what she had showed you through mails and voice calls as she started leading the discussion by relaying accurate and precise questions while her chief only came in to speak in the name of his own boss : what he liked, disliked, wanted, feared. They embodied a powerful business duet that got you talking to them with precautions and staying on your toes to be sure you were convincing enough and show them you hadn't been idle all this time.

On the other hand, your compatible match was still translating everything, would it be what you said or what his manager said, but what disturbed you more than his handsomeness and your burning hand was the fact that he kept on kissing your silhouette with his eyes. The few times you dared to support his gaze, you came across an unreadable expression, between warm and intense, something that gave you the chills as you were thrilled to be the one receiving such attention in a long time.

"About the workers, we sent you their profiles, did you receive them?" Sora asked while combing her bangs with a quick hand move, and you took the pile in your hands with a smile.

"They're right here, but we haven't contacted them yet as we wanted to confirm the place with you above all! Is there any priority between them, so that we know who to call first?" you looked her in the eyes and she nodded vigorously, accepting the files you slid on the table to her side.

"Let's see… Yes, there's those three, and… this one. They've worked with us for a few events and were well appreciated, we would like it if they were to be here again. They knew our directors' preferences in each area so they might be useful to you and the other staff you'd hire!"

Out of seven recommendations, she pushed four of them back to you fully opened, and when your eyes caught the sight of a familiar ID photography as if it was the only thing filling the white page resuming the professional experience, you almost gasped.

Lee Jooheon.

With a solemn face and short black hair, the boy of your dreams was watching you from his laid-down position, his sharp eyes, as diminished as they were in the small picture, still catching your breath and provoking exhilarating sensations in your body. The attention of your teammates diverted towards you as quickly as a finger snap, and you did your best to bottle your flustered state deep down in your twisted stomach as you had to remain professional and not let your personal matters mingle with your work ones. You couldn't object even if you wanted to ; but it burned your tongue and made your ears ring as the same thought kept banging in your head : Why? How? Why? How? WHY?

Somehow, you heard Kihyun shifting in his chair before the opened file of your ideal disappeared in his hands, and when you leveled up your pupils, you could read in the look Sora was giving your colleague that she particularly cared for this candidate.

"I'll contact this one" he informed as he lowered the papers for his eyes to shoot question marks at his interlocutor, who nodded in consideration.

_______

You knew the world was small, as in this very room, had been sitting a man compatible with you when he should have been just a business partner.

However, you didn't know yours would keep on spinning around Lee Jooheon for so long after that last encounter at the bar three months ago, or else you would have prepared yourself for this kind of coincidence to happen anytime. Or else, this situation wouldn't have felt as if Sora had taken a knife and rammed it over your wound all over again. Or else, you wouldn't have been that devastated right after the end of the meeting, completely forgetting about Jie as you were pacing round and round in the rest area, for Kihyun to watch.

Because while everyone in the room had been sharing his or her advice until they were satisfied with the terms of the negotiations, your mind had been half occupied by the task of making the link the between the care in Sora's eyes, the discomfort between her and your colleague, and the re-apparition of your soulmate. And the conclusion you had come to find was…

"That's her, right?" you barked at Kihyun who jolted in surprise at your little burst out. "That's his ex!"

"Lower your voice, they're still here!" he warned you. "And yes, she is" he then shrugged.

"You saw her name in the contracts, right? Why didn't you tell me?! This is so embarrassing!" you ruffled your hair and threw an accusing look at him.

How come the law, or maybe life in general, were so determined to mess up with you? Did they wish to see the vise tighten itself around you to the point it would feel like you definitely couldn't escape from this? Were you between the hands of a sadist pulling at the strings that would ridicule you the most?

"So what if she's his ex? What does it change? You would have refused to take part in the project? We are working here!" your colleague and friend answered, his tone inducing that he was a bit annoyed.

Yet, he marked a point and you grumbled in defeat, his face now showing he was completely unphased by your anger – angering you even more.

"This is so embarrassing Kihyun, I don't know where to hide myself right now" you then moaned while rubbing your blushing face with your panicked hands.

"Because you don't have to hide! I repeat : what if she's his ex?" Kihyun emphasized, less and less sure that he could follow your train of thoughts.

"What are you going to do with him?" you ignored his question because, well, you didn't have an answer to it.

The sigh that left his thin lips was so displeasing to hear.

"I'm gonna call him and propose him the offer, just like I am supposed to do" he explained in a calm tone, hoping it would help you to calm down too.

Your eyes came across his and even more than his sigh, his stern expression wasn't to your liking, at all. First his trap at the bar, now this secret information that could have helped you digest the whole thing better ; he might be the one wanting you to have a heart attack, in the end.

Your new year's resolution had been to move on from Lee Jooheon and to stop considering love as a priority for a while, and you had been doing quite fine up 'til now. Why? Because you hadn't seen his face ever since that night on the sidewalk, or more exactly, you had avoided it or anything that could remind you of him like some kind of bacteria. Posts of Kihyun on social medias? Muted, as well as his voice when he made the mistake to pronounce his name – one killing stare and that was it. The club he worked at? Banned from your options to have a funny night. The TV corner talking about football and his great return? You knew exactly its time slot depending on the day now. And positive thoughts? Always welcomed, as well as the flirting with some guys on dating apps or at your friends' parties. He had been doing well without you in the meantime, retrieving his old life, so why shouldn't you?

"Stop looking at me like that" you hissed through gritted teeth, wishing to smack Kihyun's confident expression out of his face.

"Like what? Like I'm hearing some bullshit coming out of your mouth? Sorry but that's actually the case so I can't help it" he then smiled cockily, and strangely enough, your cheeks tickled as he made you want to laugh at yourself as well.

You knew you were overreacting, but you couldn't help it. Why did it suddenly feel like the carefree attitude you had adopted was as fragile as a house of cards, ready to get whisked away by what you only saw as a storm coming right at you?

If every single effort you had put in forgetting about Lee Jooheon had paid off, then why were you panicking? The thought that maybe you had been more of an impostor than you'd like to admit was turning your blood cold.

"You're going to hide it from him too? And the fact that she actually recommended him?" you asked your partner while regaining your composure.

"So that's what's actually bugging you, I see…" Kihyun nodded, the smirk still present on his pale face.

"Of course it is!" your lingering care for him spoke for itself. "It means she's still interested in him, and if they meet again… If they meet again…"

You didn't want to imagine it. As much as you certainly didn't wish to see him at all, you needed even less to witness him shattering in front of his ex when she had already turned him into a mess. Or worse, to watch their romance bloom all over again if you ever had read her eyes rightly, and to feel uncomfortable, if not hurt.

"I don't want to see it, no thanks." you told yourself aloud, and to your surprise, Kihyun got what you meant with only those few words.

"You won't see it. You know why? Because the man she works for, the manager we saw earlier, is her ideal, and they're actually dating, she left Jooheon for this guy. She just has affection and surely pity for him. I'm sure she wants to see him again just to be sure he's doing fine because she cares about him in a way."

"Then did you think of him? Did you think of how hurt he'd be to see them together?" you pointed out his negligence that seemed to keep on revealing itself ever since his questionable choice back at the bar.

Kihyun chuckled at your worries and crossed his arms, looking at you tenderly this time.

"You sound pretty concerned for someone who's proclaimed herself as, I quote, "careless about boys" just a few days ago for the umpteenth time..."

"I-I'm just empathic, unlike you it seems" you scoffed with a shrug.

"I am always thinking of my brothers first. And what I am thinking nowadays about him, is that you resolve trauma by trauma. Trust me, Y/N, I was wrong at the bar last time, but right now, I know what I'm doing."

Every single pore of his skin, every single inch of his posture were screaming that he actually did know what he was doing, his confidence emanating from him like a glowing and powerful aura, so much that it chased the cloud of panic you had been struggling in away.

"You always have the last word, huh?" you sighed before it faded into a smile.

"That's why we always conclude contracts, I'm the best at convincing. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a phone call to make…" he crooned as he walked away with Jooheon's number and nickname displaying on his phone's screen, and you caressed your flushed cheeks before sighing again, the anticipation pressuring your lungs.

Suddenly – but not so surprisingly…– you wished to meet him again. Your shell had indeed been made of glass, as your inner voice was already whining that you wanted him to be there on that night. And bitterly, you realized that you had moved on, yes, but not far enough ; you had let go, yes, but not of everything.

You felt so upset to see that you had definitely been convincing yourself half-heartedly. But well, that colleague and supposedly friend of yours was definitely not helping.

"Y/N, you forgot your stuff in the room" Himchan informed you as he walked past the rest area, followed by the very ex and her actual boyfriend you bowed to.

You sprinted towards the meeting room, hoping it would be empty so that you could groan loudly once and for all to evacuate the weight of distress crashing your ribcage. She was so pretty, so well-mannered, so determined, so professional, so feminine, that it made you feel like a naked worm who just deserved to be left alone in the dirt, and nowhere near the blooming flower she was. You were no competition for her, and she was the perfection Jooheon deserved according to the law ; how come you had expected anything?

Some unwelcomed tears came to play with your eyelids, as if your body was laughing at you by trying to make you properly pitiful. Three months had gone by, but your stomach still twisted at the sight of his picture? REALLY?

"Excuse me, Miss Y/L/N?" a voice as soft as velvet smoothed your eardrums that had been buzzing for the last two minutes, and you looked back to thank with your eyes the one who had prevented you from becoming deaf and suffering from a harsh headache.

And that very person happened to be the one whose way of ending your sentences and picturing your ideas as if you had drawn them yourself in his mind had petrified you in the same meeting room earlier, and now just his gaze did in the corridor as he smiled broadly before approaching your shaken figure.

Jie truly was handsome and beyond chic, making him intimidating but not in a negative way, just one that made you respect and admire him without even knowing him inside-out. He could be compared to the handsome main character in a manga before whom the girl – and the reader as well – was losing the strength in her limbs.

"I wished to ask you earlier but you disappeared quite quickly… Would you like to meet tomorrow night for a team gathering, with your colleagues? We've been working together for a while now but we haven't been able to talk properly without a working context, I thought it would be nice for our teams to get to know each other in a friendly manner" he offered, to your great surprise.

The idea was not so bad, and you knew that when it came to going out for a drink, your teammates were always the first ones to respond positively.

"Oh yes, that's a great initiative! Thanks for proposing!" you smiled, and realized that you felt more at ease ever since he was facing you, as if the air around you was fresh and clean, not thick and overpowering.

He seemed to relax as he heard your answer, then he took in a sharp breath before asking :

"Then… Can I have your personal number? I only have the one from your office… So that I can tell you the time and address?"

Bold move. Had he been anyone else, you would have not seen anything else than a professional and nice proposition ; however, something in your guts was telling you there was more to it. From the way his eyes were always so dark and sparkly when they crossed your stare, from the way he smiled confidently but his cheeks were flushed, from the way he had dared to stand so close to you… You could recognize your own flirty behavior from the night at the club when you had met Jooheon, and as scared as you were to admit it, you were 97% sure that you were his ideal one.

The question was : was it fate that you had crossed paths? And if yes, should you give it a try? This man had no choice but to like you and wish to stay by your side, or at least the chances were slimmer for him to leave like every man before him had, however… However, why did you feel like you were cheating on Jooheon as you grasped his phone between your shy fingers to type your number, when the guy was supposed to be nothing but a souvenir you should free yourself of?

Jie happily took the device back and shoved it into his blazer's pocket, and after one last long glance at your traits, he left to look for his boss. Unbeknownst to you who had still read the other signs, his heart was pounding under his chest and his head was busy thinking of you until the next day when you were about to meet again.

*

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* 

Qian Jie [11:15 a.m.] : Hello Y/N, this is Jie. I hope you had a great morning. I'm texting you to send the address and time as agreed. Here is the map with the location. Let's say we should meet at 8.30 p.m., is that okay with you? 😊

You were the last one to show up at the fancy dining bar, which was already full of university students, co-workers, friends on a hangout or even loners, all sitting around barbecue plates grilling fresh meat and vegetables. The scent of alcohol and food stimulated your buds and your mouth watered as you wandered between the tables, looking for familiar faces.

And the familiar face you finally spotted was the one of a blonde man smiling while grilling some piece of what you guessed was beef, and as if he had sensed you coming, Jie immediately leveled up his eyes to meet yours. Your left hand heated up in no time, but less than your cheeks as you could clearly read in his stare that he was finding you… Pretty. His pupils scanned your silhouette quickly from head to toes, before he came right back at your face and his cheekbones reddened a bit as he finally gave you the biggest of smiles.

He pressed himself to move his things that had been displayed on the seat next to him, and he then silently motioned you to come and take the place he had just arranged. Had he done it on purpose? Probably. Did you find it cute? Maybe. Noticing his agitated and excited state, everyone at the table finally turned around or stopped looking at their phones to acknowledge you, and your colleagues all exclaimed :

"Y/N! Finally!"

"What took you so long?" Jiwoo, who was sitting at the far end of the table – and consequently at the opposite of the seat you were supposed to take at Jie's side – asked you with a sly smile, as during the day, you had finally confessed to her who you thought that handsome man was to you, or more accurately, who you were to him.

You had been quite embarrassed to tell her as you knew she had found him pretty attractive, but Jiwoo never ceased to surprise you with her cheerful state which never betrayed an ounce of jealousy. Surprised you as well, because if she was then sitting far away from Jie, she seemed to have found another target in the teammates from Sora's company. Indeed, each secretary had brought their coworkers responsible of the communication about the event or supposed to help you, your group then occupying at least three tables.

What had taken you so long, had been firstly the tasks you had wished to finish before leaving the building, and also your hard time choosing your outfit. In a way, you had wished to look pretty, but it wasn't exactly because of Jie's presence ; it was more because you were utterly conscious of Sora's. You had dreaded all day long to meet her – and her boyfriend – again, as you felt intimidated and embarrassed to be working with Jooheon's ex. That very ex whom he couldn't get over, and who, in a way, had deprived you of a relationship you had been dreaming of for so long.

You had then opted for a corduroy camel dress with large straps, wore over an oversized shirt, as well as comfortable boots and your favorite jacket. You considered you were right at the middle between casual and feminine ; at least, you felt pretty enough to finally take a seat next to Jie whose masculine yet fresh cologne hit you more than the smell of meat.

"Forgive me, I had to finish up a few things, the company's closed for three days in a row so I won't be able to work" you explained to Jiwoo and the rest of your team after everyone at the table had introduced themselves, and Kihyun chuckled at your remark.

"I hope you're going to take a break for the week-end and not think of work" he then inquired as he poured you some beer.

"You have a long week-end? How lucky of you!" Sora suddenly exclaimed with her hands clasping, making her boyf-… Her boss, laugh before his lips touched his glass.

God, it was painted all over his face ; he just loved her. His eyes were bearing an enamored spark as they landed on her, his long lashes giving them something so tender you felt chills on your arms just by watching.

You secretly wished someone – Lee Jooheon – would look at you like that. Oh but, Lee Jooheon had probably looked at her like that back in their days. Lucky her.

Before you could slap yourself to get out of your pitiful thoughts and way too envious state so that you could actually enjoy your night, Jie's smooth voice resounded in your eardrums :

"You want some?" he asked while holding a piece of meat between the pliers in his left hand, and you finally saw it.

Shining so brightly, looking more vivid than the heating charcoal under the barbecue plate in front of him, his life-line was lightened for you to see. You had been right : you were his ideal. You couldn't do anything except for nodding as this revelation and his two dark eyes boring into yours caught you off guard.

Was that him actually looking at you lovingly, like that, as you had just wished?

"Let me make you a wrap then" he smiled as he turned away from you to work on his preparation.

Your eyes dropped on his veiny forearms that were revealed as he had rolled up the sleeves of his white shirt to his elbows, before they dared to spy his profile. It was neat, as if sculpted in marble, as if borrowed from a manhwa. His hair looked wet on purpose and were combed back with the same hairstyle as the day before, yet a few strands were falling before his forehead, probably having lost the battle against the breeze outside. Was it because you felt lonely that you suddenly found him really attractive? Probably, because your heartbeat hadn't changed. However, at the thought that you were the girl of this man's fantasies, waves of heat came crashing against your skin and you bit your lip.

Was it a coincidence that he showed up now, or a sign that your heart should give a chance for another man to take it?

As Jie handed the piece of meat and lettuce neatly folded to you, you felt in his eyes that he was conveying a bit of his emotions at the same time, as something really sweltering was sparkling in them and lit up a tiny flame down your stomach. That man was so elegant and charming, and he dreamed to be with someone like you.

But that elegance and charm weren't the only great things you could list to describe him. As the dinner went on, you did your best to turn a blind eye on Sora's presence at the table and ended up chatting with Jie and his colleagues, whom you discovered were all good at Korean or English, and pretty nice. But Jie was always the nicest, the gentlest, the smartest, the fiercest of them all, at least in your eyes as you stared at him shamelessly.

He had dimples, just like Jooheon, but you quickly came to the conclusion that it was the only thing the two men had in common, probably explaining why the little light Jie's eyes had turned on inside you had soon been eaten by the remaining feelings Jooheon apparently still put you through just at the thought of him.

Jie was reserved, calm, hard-working. You came to understand that he was at least two years older than you, making you somehow shy and impressed. And you could read, in the eyes of his co-workers that gradually were turning red because of the soju you were sharing, that they all had a huge respect and admiration for him.

He was the perfect businessman every team would wish to work with : a good listener and an opportunity giver as he always asked about the quiet ones' opinions ; a responsible and wary person as he warned a teammate about how he should stop drinking because he had to meet his wife back home ; a polite mediator when he sensed that someone's remark could offend others, starting to calmly show to that person how rude he or she had been, or explaining his or her words so that everyone felt equally understood and not attacked.

And even though he didn't look like it, he was a funny guy. A timid one, but his jokes and his lovely smiles never failed to spread the happiness on the rest of the table's faces. He looked icy on the outside, having the silhouette of the serious secretary tightly gripped in his suit and shoes ; however, with how he remembered everyone's preferences when cooking the meat – including yours –, you could see that he was very warm.

On top of that, you truly felt how the law had made you a match to him, as he always seemed to complete your trail of thoughts, opening your eyes to another view you hadn't seen yet ; as he sensed when you didn't wish to drink anymore, stopping his teammates when they insisted to pour you a glass ; as he looked like he was eager to hear anything coming from your mouth, generously complimenting you for what you had achieved but without ever crossing the line where it would be too much.

Qian Jie was undeniably a sweet, sweet man, a man who embodied the perfect groom every mom would wish for her daughter to join at the end of the aisle ; nevertheless, objective perfection wasn't yours, and so the law was telling you.

Because, sadly for him, you couldn't help but compare his traits to your own ideal once you had drunk and eaten enough to do it without feeling your stomach knot.

It wasn't that Jooheon couldn't fit with the words warm, calm, or caring ; it just wasn't the same. Jooheon was more mischievous, more spontaneous and care-free when it came to talk about life stuff. On the few Instagram stories Kihyun had shared, you had seen him lose his temper during the futsal, or laugh and shout like a dork when he scored a goal. During the time you had spent chit-chatting with him at the bar or texting him afterwards, you had been attracted to his mysterious side, but his bubbly one had drawn you to him even more. It was that very spark that you liked, that insouciant charm he had, which certainly had been distraught by Sora but still managed to manifest itself from behind the walls Jooheon had built.

Just like his hair, Jooheon was fire, when Jie was water. The first one was full of passionate feelings to express, so much that he was about to break, so much that he was impulsive just like he had been that night with you ; when the latter seemed to prefer the smoothest of ways, always putting much thought in his actions and wordings, even in a situation where he had alcohol thickening his blood and was supposedly struck by the powers of the law.

You then wondered : what was the law's message to you? How come your ideal was fire, when you were supposed to suit water? Was it that you should trouble Jie's flow of life and make it more exciting and wilder, or that you should've canalized the flames so that Jooheon wouldn't burn himself anymore?

______

"Let's play a game! Girls versus boys, c'mon!" Changmin, the guy from your team who was the same age as yours, suddenly shouted, with his rosy cheeks inducing that he had swallowed a lot of booze.

You all agreed cheerfully and started exchanging seats, and in all the haste you accidentally ended up next to Sora, realizing then that you were going to get paired with her. She smiled at you immediately, and you wished she had been less beautiful, less kind, less lovely as she started a conversation with you while the boys were still struggling to understand the game's rules. Just as Jie and Jooheon were a world apart from each other, you felt diminished next to her, crumbling under the pile of differences you were spotting between the both of you.

You compared yourself again and again, as she shared with you her story about how she managed to climb up the ladder in her company at such a young age, as she envied your imagination but had the audacity and business-logic you lacked in, as she was so damn adorable that you could understand why Jooheon's heart hadn't turned to you at once. And if you couldn't see any flaws in him plausibly because the law was blinding you, this time you had your eyes fully opened as you watched and beamed at her, yet you couldn't pinpoint any flaws in her as well. You then imagined how hard it must be to fall out of love with someone like her, and how hard Jooheon must believe that he would never find better .

"Hello? Oh hey Jooheon!" Kihyun suddenly shouted over the ambient noise and his eyes instantly narrowed at you, a sickening smile twisting the corners of that filthy mouth of his.

You looked back at him as your body tensed up ; your ears did their best to catch the slightest word from this conversation ; your hands crumpled the napkin on your lap ; and your heart simply stopped beating as it had ascended up to your throat.

"Really? You're not kidding? You're taking the job?!" he exclaimed loud enough for you to hear. "Aaaaah you thought well my son, I can't wait to be your boss! You should be nice to me or I'll reduce your pay… Anyway good choice mate! Where I am? I'm out drinking and eating with Y/N and other colleagues!"

The way he insisted on your name punched an iron fist into your chest, which grabbed your bloody organ and pulled it down your throat to your stomach. Sora was right next to you and you could bet that she was listening too. What was he doing, putting on a show, all the while staring at you?!

I hate you, I hate you, I hate you, you cursed him through squinted eyes, and when you turned your attention back to your game partner, she was looking at you with surprisingly fond eyes.

However, she didn't say a word and simply grabbed your hands gently as Changmin told you to do so, and the game began, with a lot of laughter, too much mistakes and shouts, and thankfully, it stole your time to realize that you definitely were going to meet him again under those weird circumstances. Changmin sounded like he was full of crazy ideas tonight, as he shouted again, with his high-pitched voice :

"Let's go to the Golden Tiger! We're regulars there, we'll have some discounts! I like all of you so I want to treat you all with the company card!"

You suddenly felt as if you were going under a high fever, chills sliding down your skin while your head started spinning. Why that club, out of all the others? There were plenty of party sites in Seoul, why would he think of the one Jooheon works in? There were too much of coincidences in a short time, too much for you at least.

"I think I'll go home" you shyly muttered after a few seconds of zoning out and you stood up clumsily, hoping to escape as you knew your coworkers could turn into sharp traps clenching your ankle and preventing you to flee the scene.

You obviously knew that going down there was going to result in you losing your reason as you were completely disturbed by the love triangle you were tangled in. You would end up doing crazy things to evacuate all your stress, such as such as going to Jooheon's counter and bawl your eyes out before him because you felt empty and way too emotional after having spent the night with his ex. With that very ex to watch and him only paying attention to her and not to your ridiculous state, on top of that. This scenario was close to the one of a nightmare, and it was definitely a no-no.

You spanned the bench you had been seating on and everyone followed your lead, thinking you were pressed to go clubbing when you actually just couldn't stay in place and wished to run away as fast as you could. Once outside, your heels were bouncing slightly on the pavement, as you clutched your phone against your heart while the rest of the group was busy paying for your food, going to the restroom or trying to light a cigarette in spite of the breeze. Then, as you were about to bid them goodbye, Sora's voice was suddenly heard delivering the same excuse as yours, but with an alibi no one could question :

"I think we'll go home, that mister obviously can't follow" she struggled to say with a smile as she had the arm of her boyfriend hooked around her neck, his legs apparently giving up on him and making him completely lean on her, with his head down.

"Where do you think you're going?" Jiwoo threw darts at you with her eyes as she could guess from your moving figure that you were impatiently waiting for the moment to slip away.

"I'm-"

"Y/N, can I have a word with you for a second?" Sora suddenly called you out behind your back as she tossed her boss's body over to one of their colleagues who whined at how heavy he was.

Cold sweat ran down your spine and you gulped, your body always suffering from high tension whenever your eyes met hers.

"What is it?" you asked her after having taken a few steps away with her at your side, your tongue heavy and your cheeks completely flushed.

Even though the fresh air was stimulating your senses, they were quite altered by the effects of alcohol. You hadn't drunk that much, yet you had barely managed to stuff something to eat down your throat, too immersed into Jie's doings next to you, when you hadn't been thinking about Jooheon.

Through your half-closed eyelids, you could still see that the young woman was somehow hesitant, swaying from one foot to another and her fingers fiddling with each other. She bit her lip as she looked up at you, before grabbing your shoulders.

"Look… I'm sorry but I can't help saying what's been on my mind… I think… You know me" she started with a smile, and your tension suddenly went up to its limit, making you dizzier than you already were. "Or should I say, you know Jooheon, and through him… You know who I was to him. I read it in your eyes on the day of the meeting, and I read it on your face tonight, when he called."

You felt so ashamed that you wished a black hole could suck you up in an instant far away from her grasp and her eyes still looking at you caringly.

"I just wanted to tell you that you don't have to feel uncomfortable with me around! We are working together and he'll be there on the ship. To be honest, I wished Jooheon could meet someone after me who made him realize I wasn't the best for him, and if that's you- Oh my god sorry this sounds weird" she pressed her words. "I just think you're such a cool girl, Y/N. I haven't seen Kihyun trying so obviously hard in a while, he wouldn't if he didn't think you were too! I hope you two last long!"

_______

"What's going on between them?" Kihyun asked as his eyes fell on his friend's ex and you, the concern clear in his voice as he had just stepped out of the dining bar.

"I don't know, but Y/N wants to leave" Jiwoo grumbled before shivering as a whirlwind shrouded her body and messed with her light blonde hair.

"Ah…" your colleague sighed before taking his phone out to answer to his last message.

Kihyun [11:30 p.m.] : Dude, we're going to your club, is there a free table for the twelve of us?

My kid Jooheon [11:36 p.m.] : TWELVE?

My kid Jooheon [11:36 p.m.] : I'll see what I can do, but you better pay the bill tonight not like the last time, I'll never be nice to you again

My kid Jooheon [11:36 p.m.] : AND STOP TEXTING ME WHEN I'M AT WORK FFS

Kihyun [11:38 p.m.] : Well you're answering anyways, thanks I love yooooou

My kid Jooheon [11:39 p.m.] : Y/N's coming?

Kihyun [11:45 p.m.] : Oh, weird question isn't it, you never ask abt her

Kihyun [11:45 p.m.] : But I don't think so man

My kid Jooheon [11:46 p.m.] : Ah… I hope that's not because of me, I don't want her to miss a great night like she did last time at the bar

Kihyun [11:46 p.m.] : You're still thinking of this? Shit I guess I really messed up that time wow

[Unread message] Jooheon [11:46 p.m.] : Oh really no kidding

Kihyun [11:48 p.m.] : She's a bit drunk right now so I just think she's tired

Kihyun was lying, because he was well aware of your reasons without you wording it to him ; however, he couldn't make his friend feel worse than he already was.

My kid Jooheon [11:49 p.m.] : Someone's taking her home, right?

Kihyun [11:49 p.m.] : I don't know, she's about to leave now

My kid Jooheon [11:50 p.m.] : Ok…

My kid Jooheon [11:50 p.m.] : I know it's awkward of me to ask but… Just don't let her walk home alone, please

______

"I got rejected" you had managed to reply to Sora in the meantime.

Her rant had killed you on the spot, her kindness completely fired up with alcohol and drifting to something close to indiscretion without her wanting it to. You knew her words weren't meant to hurt you, but it still did.

She was so desperate to have Jooheon moving on, to lessen the burden on her shoulders, the weight of the pain she had caused obviously still tormenting her. Just like him trying with you, she was seeking for a way to his happiness on his behalf, but in your eyes, it was mainly in order to make up for her guilt.

"Y/N!" Kihyun suddenly ran up the pavement to you, pushing discretely his phone in his pocket as he wished to keep his last conversation a complete secret and try to execute his "mission".

"Yes?" you threw a jaded stare at him.

You didn't have the strength to deal with two people wishing for a relationship between Jooheon and you  to happen when you knew better than them that the latter didn't want to see it bloom to begin with. You were too tired to prove them wrong and fight against their concerns that were anything but touching at this point. Your lower lip started to tremble as you gave Kihyun a pleading, defeated look ; you were on the verge of breaking into a set of tears as you wished for nothing except for you to be safe and sound in your apartment, falling asleep so that this long night would be put to an end and another day would come quicker. A day where you'd be back to your strong-self dealing amazingly with her feelings and her everyday life without romance like she had promised herself to do.

"Y/N, let's go" Jie suddenly told you from his position a few feet away, saving you from hell as if he had heard your secret prayers, as if he was the only one to get the distress you were drowning in. "I'm not going to the club either, so I shall come with you. C'mon, I'll take you home."

The second your stare came across his and his reassuring tone caressed your eardrums, some salty, hot, tickling water definitely accrued at the crease of your eyelids. That kind man down there had fulfilled your needs without you even asking for it. He would certainly work for your happiness, and he was probably already fond of you and could be for a long time if you'd just let him ; still, the warm smile he addressed you wasn't enough to falter the misery the name "Jooheon" had pushed you in all over again. Nothing could ever make up for it, no one could fill up the void in your heart, except for Jooheon himself. However, he wouldn't. And to realize that, after three months of persuasion, was eating you alive.

       Kihyun [11:55 p.m.] : She's leaving now, with a man from the company we'll be working for…

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You couldn't clearly picture the way back home with Jie when you woke up the next morning with your head wheezing painfully, and you never tried to recall it afterwards as you spent your long weekend reconciliating with the fighting spirit you had sported 'til the past two days. You just knew you had walked for a while and felt a hint of his touch on your shoulders as he had covered them with his coat. You could picture yourself hopping in a taxi, yet you couldn't remember if you had talked, fallen asleep, or maybe cried in front of him ; neither did you know how you had managed to enter your flat and find your way to bed.

Qian Jie [10:06 a.m.] : Are you alright?

This lone message had put a smile on your dry lips, and your heavy fingers had managed to type a "yes, thank you for asking and taking me home yesterday" even though the room had seemed to be turning around your body, not helping to focus. You hadn't drunk that much to the point of enduring a blackout and such a harsh hangover, but you could guess that it simply were your brain and body that refused to cooperate after they had been plunged into the swamp of your negative emotions all over again.

However, you took the signs into account and instead of burying your emotions deep down as the tsunami they turned into once triggered wasn't welcomed, you accepted the fact that you were damned to like Lee Jooheon for a longer while. You hadn't been able to force your feelings out no matter how hard you had tried, then only being nicer to yourself could lift the weight of misery off your shoulders and help you not to falter at the sound of his name next time.

Meanwhile, you allowed yourself to chat with Jie sometimes for work, sometimes casually as he managed to push the conversation over event-related things. Of course you liked talking to him, as your mind was somehow destined to clink with his more than with the rest of men in this world, and obviously Jie seemed to be falling for you as you deciphered the sweet tone in his voice every time he would call you to check on – futile – things. And if his feelings were still one-sided for now, you gave your heart a break by stopping the overthinking and just enjoying your little excitement ; maybe you'd turn the page too before you'd know it…?

However, the day you had to see Jooheon's face again came sooner than you had expected, because right after you had come back to work, your team manager had had the wonderful idea to plan a briefing reunion between your team and the staff you had hired for the food making, the service, the animation or the music, were they independent workers or specialized companies which would then send a representant. You would explain what you expected from them, what was the theme, what were the rules, what would be the organization, all of this around a small buffet.

Himchan had thought that it would be a more humane and clearer way than communicating by mail or phone, and if you couldn't deny, your nervous heart didn't thank him on the D-Day while you were waiting in your company's hall to greet the convoked people. Of course, Jooheon wouldn't be represented as he had been especially recommended ; so of course, instead of having the information relayed to him by someone else, he was going to hear it from your mouth directly, your very mouth that still itched at the thought of your kiss ; and of course, Kihyun had ensured you with a smirk that his friend had confirmed his presence. How professional of him. What confused you above it all, was that you couldn't decipher the reason why he would still accept this job, when he was back in the football game…

______

The clock was ticking on the watch enclosing his left wrist, and Jooheon found himself unable to walk through the glass doors of the huge building without having the fear that his heart would burst like a firework. Once again, his body was strangely stimulated by some flashes of thoughts he had of you every once in a while, and that never missed to make him feel edgy. Had he really made the right choice, wouldn't his mind had let go of the memories just like ashes evaporating in the air by now?

He hated how indiscreet his eyes had been these past months, lurking at Kihyun's phone's screen whenever he was sliding through his feed on Instagram, hoping he'd get to see a picture of you smiling and being – at least apparently – well. Because he, had been doing pretty well. Much better, to be precise.

Just like you had suggested him to, he had finally gathered the sufficient courage to confront his second biggest fear, football, as he couldn't stand the feeling of being such a loser and scaredy-cat anymore. Stopping to live like that had somehow been his way to cope with what he had done to you. He had then met with his coach after a long time of ignoring his calls, who had gladly welcomed him and re-offered his help to train him all over again, as well as his teammates who were happy to get their brother back in the family.

And as he had finally felt alive on the track field after a long time of wandering like a lost soul between his home and the club, his thankful heart and mind had only been craving to tell you how right you had been. In the end, without even being by his side anymore, you still had been the wind pushing him across the paths of challenges but happiness as well, would it be that night or right now, and Jooheon could never forget how this quick passage of yours had marked him for life. You had tamed the fire within him, reason why the ashes were still around…

His sharp eyes had barely caught the sight of you chatting with Kihyun and whom he guessed were other colleagues behind the windows, that his stomach twisted itself just like his mother used to twist their drenched laundry.

"Lee Jooheon, we need to go, they're waiting" a dismayed voice called him out.

His agent was standing in front of the doors, his expression clearly inducing how impatient and upset he was starting to feel before his childish behavior.

"Why'd you come anyway? It's embarrassing, I don’t need you for personal affairs like these" the younger boy grumbled while pushing his hands into the pockets of his black trousers.

"The coach told me to see for myself how much of an important meeting you were attending for you to miss a training day" the man smiled sarcastically.

"Ah-a! I regret going back to him, I didn't know he'd be that clingy and wouldn't trust me ever again!" Jooheon scoffed, earning some time.

"It's not that he doesn't trust you, he's just scared that he'll lose you anytime, you're still his precious gem you know, the future of his club, the son he had lost for a while, his-"

"Oh no stop it please, this is cringy" Jooheon frowned while covering his ears, even if he still heard the laugh of his agent which drastically stopped as he pushed the door open.

"Come on. Let's go" he ordered with a straight face.

"I really didn't miss you, not once" the footballer sighed.

This man, Mr. Seo, a father of two kids and a devoted husband, had always been there for him, even when he had cut ties with everyone. He had kept on sending diet food and side dishes to his place after the injury, just like had been doing back when Jooheon was training under his protection, with encouraging notes telling him to take his time but to come back. Unfortunately for him, Jooheon had only felt more guilty and unworthy at the sight of these pure displays of affection he couldn't pay back, instead of getting cheered up.

Your stares met as soon as Jooheon made his entry, and the corners of his mouth couldn't help but curl themselves up to offer you a shy smile, his suffering stomach immediately untying so that it would welcome the fluttering sensation of sparks tingling its walls. Yet you didn't smile back, or more accurately, not at him but at someone coming from behind him as your eyes quickly left his. They indeed followed a man who strode past Jooheon's manager, wearing a dark brown suit and with a neat hairstyle, his blonde hair color seeming to be the one of his birth and not the result of bleaching the locks a few times. The man came to stand next to you, and as Jooheon was concentrating to distinguish your voice over the lots of blabbering around him in the hall, Kihyun called him out :

"Lee Jooheon! Oh hello Mr. Seo! Finally, I was about to call you!" his friend smiled, obviously having said it loud enough so that everyone would admire the latecomer.

All the faces turned to him as they heard the familiar name, belonging to a "football player who has made his comeback to the infamous club in Seoul and is preparing all over again to enter the national team in the near future". Or so the medias were saying, in such a dramatical way. As much as he hated being the center of attention, his coach had been going out and about his "great return" as well as his teammates on their social accounts – they were proud, but way too proud. Jooheon hissed discretely, noticing embarrassingly that a girl from the group was already gazing at him quite intently, but what embarrassed him the most was his brain that told him he would have liked to catch your attention instead.

However, you were still discussing with the suited man whose head was quite close to yours, showing him something on sheets you were arranging for him and nodding back at him, before you cleared your throat :

"Welcome everyone, and thank you for coming. Please follow us to the first floor where our team manager is waiting for you" you announced.

"Wow she's young" Jooheon heard a man whisper.

"And pretty hot" another muttered back before they giggled together.

The sparks in Jooheon's body suddenly lit up a flame that was about to blow up into a raging fire if he ever heard another comment coming from their dirty mouths. He hadn't known he would be that sensitive to see you again today, and if he had, he would have gladly stayed in bed this early morning. Everything was wrong about the way he was feeling right now, about how he was craving for your attention, about how he was nervous to be around you, when you seemed to be so calm – with that man standing at your side and smiling at you and you smiling back at him and him letting you enter the lift first as a true gentleman even if his hand on your back was a tad too much.

It was as if the situation was pushing him into a corner of discomfort the more he had your silhouette, which was lovely more than pretty hot, in his sight, that very silhouette he had refused to hold in his arms exclusively. He could feel the excitement bubbling within his limbs, sign that you still were like a shot of happiness to him, but what were those upsetting side-effects?

______

You stepped into a large room where the guests each chose a seat while you took place next to Himchan who was ready to give his speech. Jie sat at the front row, on your left, prepared to take notes so that he could relay the organization to his boss ; and thankfully, Sora had sent a colleague, putting the strangling reunion of your love triangle with Jooheon off to the scary date of the event.

"Good morning everyone! I'm Kim Himchan, the manager in charge of this project and this is Yoo Kihyun, Y/L/N Y/N and Jeon Jiwoo, my people, my team" your boss started with a clap of his hands.

Jooheon was sitting at the far back of the room, his right foot landed over his left knee, his hands with tangled fingers across his leg, his black turtleneck top under his camel trucker jacket catching your eye, but less than the fact that he had shortened his hair and the color had faded since the last time you met, signs that a long time had passed. Yet, his handsomeness never failed to feed your eyes, but when they met his dark pupils, your blood turned icy. He looked like the distant, rebellious kid at the back of the class that pinned the teachers down in their place with their piercing gaze.

You wondered if Jie was feeling the same way every time he met you, and if that was the case, you pitied him ; you were quite lucky to come across Jooheon only once in a while, as he shook your senses enough for you to feel disturbed even once you had parted, and you hated it.

Though this time, something had changed in him, but you couldn't pinpoint exactly what. Something in his look was turning your body stiff, just like it had the first time at the club ; it had been the only one time you had seen him shining with confidence and easiness, and right now, it seemed as if the usual gloominess that had inhabited him afterwards had… Gone. Had you guessed it right, had football really relieved him? Or was it something else? Either way, you didn't receive nor share his sadness this time as something different was emanating from him.

The more the clock on the wall was reading the seconds passing by, the more your hand was starting to hurt like hell, and the less you could focus on the meeting. You ignored if the explanation of the pain was lingering in the pure fact that the two lines were solicited at the same time, or simply that your body was overreacting under your systematical, uncontrollable desire to have Jooheon for you, and to have him lean on you.

The two pair of eyes of the men bound to you by destiny were focused on your being, unashamedly, inevitably, obviously staring at you and you only, and you were thrilled to read some kind of intensity in Jooheon's pupils each time you came to catch their sight. Mechanically, your thumb had started to slide along your palm in order to soothe the scorching sensation you thought you were the only one to suffer from, until you perceived your ideal's fingers doing exactly the same, with his palm turned to the ceiling for you to see.

You then got captured in a glimpse of time and space where nobody could tell, except for the both of you, that you were letting yourselves getting consumed into the sweet pain and under each other's stares. Suddenly, when Jie shifted in his seat and grasped your attention, his shy smile at you turned the sweet pain into an excruciating one, as if someone was planting a knife into your hand again and again.

It told how much you were torn between your need for your one-sided love to be accepted, and the will you had developed to walk down the possible way out of it.

"And that's about it! Any questions, before we get our claws on the appetizing buffet behind you?" Himchan concluded just before you'd scream out of pain, and as nobody rose a hand, you used the mass movement towards the back of the room as an opportunity to run discretely to the toilets.

The cold water flowing on your palm made you sigh in relief, and you closed your eyes for a moment, but ended up opening them in a haste as the picture of Jooheon staring at you had appeared in the black space veiling your pupils. What was wrong with him? When you had imagined he'd be nothing more than formal with you as three months had passed without him regretting anything, in fact he had almost been scanning you naked with his insisting look at your face. You slowly regained your composure as the pain dispelled, and finally walked out of the restroom, only to be met by one of the guests, a man in his mid-thirties, in the corridor.

"Oh sir? Did you lose yourself?" you asked him as he had been standing with his back against the wall.

He stood up properly with a smug look on his traits that instantly put you in a cagey position as something disturbing was glowing from his body, like a bad feeling, and he took long strides until he was properly facing you.

"Actually no… It might sound weird, but I followed you here because I wanted to have a short private talk with you, Miss Y/L/N" he said with a smile that wasn't warming at all.

"R-really? You must have some points to share? Tell me so I could relay them to my sup-"

"You're really professional, I like you even more…" he acknowledged in a low-tone, and this time, you were definitely embarrassed.

Was he hitting on you, right now? There was nobody in the corridor as the restrooms were quite far from the meeting rooms, and you weren't sure of how this would end as you'd have to turn his eventual confession down.

"I just wanted a bit of privacy, to ask you out for dinner, tomorrow night. Just you and me."

"I'm sorry but I'll have to refuse, sir." you smiled awkwardly with an enchanting tone to chase away the tension building between the both of you. "Thank you for proposing, but-"

"Oh please, you can't refuse, it's my treat! I know a bunch of luxurious restaurants that women adore, you won't regret it!" he insisted, grabbing his phone in the pocket of his costume's vest and presenting it to you. "Here! Why refuse, my pretty lady, hm? That senior is ready to do anything for you."

He looked so arrogant, obviously thinking girls who were young were also dupe and would gladly give themselves to him, but he had been wrong about you. You almost rolled your eyes at his stubborn behavior, as if using his status and pet names – that were out of place – would make you change your mind.

"I'm really sorry, I can't accept your offer, sir. Should we go back to-"

"Why are you refusing?" he suddenly groaned, combing his hair nervously. "Don't you know how good of an opportunity this is for your company? We could be great partners afterwards! You shouldn't be that difficult and just give me a night, huh? C'mon, I told you you wouldn't regret it!"

Your heartbeat was now the one of some kind of fanfare turning hectic, as you felt anger fueling through your veins at his threat, but also the premises of panic because the two of you were alone.

"I don't think us going out on a date tomorrow has anything to do with my career or my company, sir" you tried to answer in the politest of tones before biting your tongue so that insults wouldn't proliferate out of your lips.

"Hey, you little- You should know better than to talk back to your elders and just accept the good deeds they do for you, shouldn't you?"

"I think I have the right to refuse, sir. I'm sorry."

"You're very stubborn as I can see… What a shame, hm?"

The man suddenly grabbed your right arm, freezing you in your heels, his eyes opened wide and his brows furrowed in pent-up frustration as you didn't comply to his far from legitim authority. And just as he had been about to lecture you some more, a hand caught his and firmly removed it from your limb.

"You heard her, right? She refused, you disgusting pervert" Jooheon interfered in a tensed, stern tone as he stepped before you, before his jaw clenched tightly.

The surprise of his sudden appearance and your frozen state quickly faded away as his citrus perfume invaded your space ; and like an enchantment, it lifted the atmosphere up, relaxed your limbs and untied the knot twisting your stomach in fear, making you feel at ease and secure.

"W-What?" the man stuttered, looking impressed by the young man's serious face and his apparent strength as he had squeezed his hand without pity.

"I filmed everything before interfering, and I'll report this to your employer, you can be sure of it. Also, I can make it buzz in a few hours, don't you know who I am? Huh? I can bring you down in a minute" he pursued as he took a step further. "I can't believe you're proudly saying you're a senior when you act like an ignorant pervert. So maybe I, a junior, should teach you how life is. Nothing will ever give you the right to think women should oblige when you say so. You're nobody. No-bo-dy. You don't have any right to tell a woman she's disrespectful when you don't respect her in the first place. Do you get what I'm saying, sir? Or should I make it clearer? You don't have any right to lay your dirty hands on a woman unless she agrees for you to do so, you hear me? You don't have any right to intimidate her or even talk to her to begin with, you scumbag, you filthy dirty scumbag I swear you should be taught to be a man"

Jooheon had approached the businessman a bit more, his right index pointing at his chest but never touching him, his physical presence enough to crush anyone else's self-assurance into dozens of pieces. His unphased expression and threatening behavior impressed you, as well as his sharp tone, mostly because you were their trigger. Something had definitely changed in him. Something that was straightening his back and glowed through every pore of his fair skin, telling you he was now standing with a confidence you hadn't known of.

He looked like a man that finally was comfortable enough in his own shoes, but as you could decipher the invisible flames of fury irradiating all around his body and spotted his left fist tightening, you grabbed his wrist so that he wouldn't take it further. Jooheon turned back to your fingers wrapped around his watch, then to you.

"I won't do anything, only if you forgive him" your ideal then addressed you in a calm tone, before he unblocked your sight of the man for you to kill him with a disgusted stare.

"Don't get that angry, young boy, I-I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry" the latter couldn't talk properly anymore, shame reddening his prominent cheeks.

Jooheon's eyes were gazing at you with a sweetness reminding you of that morning when he had held you close in his kitchen, and you cursed secretly at him for having appeared next to you when you were at your weakest, as his ambiguous behavior made your heart flutter even more. It conveyed the same light of false hopes you had tried to turn a blind eye to, and it was dangerously circling you.

"He's not the one you should apologize to" a familiar voice suddenly cut in the conversation, and Jie appeared from the end of the corridor with a face as strict as Jooheon's. "I witnessed everything as well and looked up for your company's contact information. I won't let this go. This isn't making business, this isn't profitable for your company or hers, this is harassment, and you should be ashamed of it."

Jooheon's brows quirked in surprise as he looked at the plus-one who had put an end to his somehow intimate moment with you, only to be met with the darkest stare he'd ever received in his whole life. Dark, but also… Thankful? Your eyes were going back and forth between the two saviors, as you felt that an electric vibe was circulating from a pair of eyes to another. The pain in your hand burned your flesh all over again as you did so, and the second you winced, Jooheon and Jie's attention focused on you, completely forgetting about the third party who let out a long sigh before hanging his head low, evidently having a hard time swallowing his pride to apologize to you.

"I'm sorry, miss. Forgive me."

"I hope you will stop thinking that your position should make women appreciate you and beg for a night with you. I will stay nice for now because the event is coming soon and we can't replace you in such a short time. But I hope that your attitude doesn't reflect your company's values, I'll ask about it myself. Just know that it would be shameless of you to dare come out in front of me ever again, and if you do so, the video will be out" you managed to warn him even though your voice was trembling due to your need to moan your suffering out. "Let's go back to the room"

You didn't know where your confidence to lecture an older man had come from when he had been pretty intimidating before and you had been quite scared for yourself ; surely Jooheon's and Jie's overpowering auras, like those of two knights in shining armors, had made you feel protected and supported.

"You're coming with me" Jie surprisingly took your hand in his and without further explanations, leaded the walk down the corridor, leaving the pervert behind the both of you ruminating his own frustration and fright to get reported anytime, but also Jooheon whose lips got sealed the second your skins weren't in contact anymore.

His eyes fell down on your hand intertwined in his, an unreadable expression veiling his traits before they went up to your face as you looked back at him while walking away, still flustered by his intervention, and torn to have your hand in another man's.

______

"Where are you taking me? And why hold my hand?" you asked Jie as you followed behind him.

You didn't have the guts to tear your hands apart on your own, the serious look on his face preventing you to do so.

"Where can I find ice?" Jie asked you back as he kept on pacing straight in the hallway.

"Ice? Ah that's right, we forgot to put some on the tables for the drinks! We can go to the rest area, we have a fridge there" you informed him, your heart beating fast. "It's the door on the right, over there…"

Once you had entered the empty room, Jie finally freed your palm to close the door behind the both of you, then he pressed himself towards the fridge. You silently observed him as he put some ice cubes in a towel he had found on the vending machine's handle, before he told you to sit on one of the sofas.

"What? Why?"

"I know your left hand is hurting, you were rubbing it a while ago and I can feel it too, it hurts pretty badly, doesn't it?" he answered in the most natural of ways, and your heart begun the fanfare all over again.

He was so considerate, from the way he had noticed your pain, to how he had also stepped up to a senior only to defend you. For the first time since your encounter, and even though your feelings belonged to someone else, you couldn't deny that it had reached out to you, almost in a romantic way.

"O-Oh… Thank you…"

"I'm sorry I followed you to the toilets, but I was pretty worried about you" he then told you straightforwardly.

It looked like he was having a lots of arrows to shoot at you on this day.

"Actually I went to the toilets to put some water on it, but ice is way better" you sighed in relief as he was massaging your palm with the ballot of ice he had quickly made, and the mixture of the warmth of his hand supporting yours and the cold of the fabric was the most soothing of sensations.

His brows were furrowed as he was concentrating on keeping his gestures delicate, and you took this opportunity to close your eyes briefly. Some pictures of the previous incident flashed through your mind, and you gazed back at Jie to admire his sharp traits that never failed to fascinate you. How come your thoughts were monopolized by Jooheon's face and questions about him, when this man right here was ready to give you what you needed? The law was so unfair to the both of you.

"Thank you, for also coming to my rescue earlier, that man was pretty creepy" you said before biting your lip, as he probably hadn't been able to prevent himself to do so.

"I'm just glad I followed you there, my instincts definitely never betray me" he smiled purely as his eyes finally looked at you, catching you in the act of analyzing every single inch of his skin. "Oh and about tomorrow night… What will you be doing?"

"Tomorrow night? Nothing, I only told him no because I didn't want to go" you chuckled.

"Oh well… I was willing to ask you out on a date anyway, so I might just do it now. Would you mind going out to eat with me instead, tomorrow night?"

His eyes conveyed an intensity that flushed your cheeks and suspended time for a second, in this room only lightened by the few rays of sun penetrating through the small window and enlightening in gold his light strands of hair. You could have sworn your heart had finally given up some beats to this man worthy of everything, but its main rhythm was obviously stimulated by another man that was somewhere behind this door.

The way to a possible happiness without him was paved right before you for your eyes to see, and probably to a new beginning with a decent man ; however, you knew from your past relapse at the sight of Jooheon's picture, and from the way he had overshadowed Jie earlier would it be in the room or in the corridor, that you weren't quite ready to date or love anyone else but him.

"Can I give you my answer later?" you still smiled.

It would be the perfect occasion to be truthful with him and put an end to his false hopes just like Jooheon had done with you, before it would be too late, before he would end up as miserable as you had been for weeks. The temptation to just give in the easy way had been powerful as his care for you was heart-fluttering, but less than your feelings for Jooheon, and you couldn't deceive Jie or yourself anymore.

"Sure, Y/N" he gently nodded before going back to his ministrations without saying another word.

______

Jooheon had witnessed the incident from the very beginning. Indeed, he had seen you step out of the room hurriedly and not too long after, one of the men he had heard talking dirtily about you earlier in the main hall had followed you. Just like Jie, his guts had told him that nothing good would happen out of an eventual encounter, and they had taken his feet through the huge and numerous hallways of the building, the red vest of the pervert always in his sight.

He had then waited quietly at the corner of a crossover, observing the man as he had paced around in front of the women's restroom's door before stationing himself against the wall. Jooheon's heart had been bumping against his ribcage, while his hands had enclosed into tight fists, the tension getting higher in this silent corridor. When you had finally stepped out, he had caught his breath not to miss any single word of your conversation, and had brandished his handphone to record the scene in case you'd need it.

The second the man had dropped his first dirty move on you, Jooheon's anticipation had turned into anger, his veins popping out of his neck, hands and even temples. And right at the moment when he had decided he'd had enough of this disgusting scene playing under his two eyes, he had spotted the blonde man in his brown suit walking down the hallway facing his, approaching the scene. That was when a thought had popped up in his mind fueled with rage : he had promised himself not to be a coward anymore. And that very thought, had urged his body towards yours, as if attracted to you like a magnet, and made him intervene before his twisted brain could tell him to hide like the runaway he was.

Jooheon had rarely seen that red in his whole life, as he had felt on the verge to crush the man down until he had been crawling and begging for your forgiveness, but mostly, the sensation of being strong, important in your eyes had excited him somehow.

Nevertheless, it hadn't lasted long. When the blonde man had finally interrupted him in his rare time of following his heart, when he had looked at him without blinking, Jooheon's confidence had lost to his doubts, again. The sadness lingering in your last text message, the memory of your teary eyes three months ago, the echo of your voice begging him to stop acting as if there was a way for a "you" to happen struck him like a thunderbolt. Maybe this man, would make you happy when he had failed to.

That millisecond of torment had been enough for this very man to be the one taking your hand then your body away from that dirty stranger, without thinking or hesitating, and to leave him as the defeated man he still seemed to be. He thought he had changed, but once more, what had only been left, was the price of his regrets or, like his friend Minhyuk had accurately induced, the price of his feelings he had wrongfully subsided. Right in this corridor, Lee Jooheon had been a bit too late to realize that he liked you too, as his lingering anger had transformed into frustration and jealousy.

Regrets, regrets, regrets. Jooheon was getting tired of this bugging feeling. So tired that he'd do anything to not welcome them anymore. And as his eyes had fallen on his empty left hand, his vivid heart-line scorching his skin couldn't have seemed more meaningful to him.

The key to the end of this long labyrinth he had been wandering in with his eyes closed, hoping to find an issue while avoiding the new experiences in front of him, was in fact residing in one thing : his heart, that had given him the most impulsive, spontaneous of directives in a while, but the most ecstatic of feelings once he had been close to you.

His heart, calling for him to fall off the cliff he had been hanging on for too long, and to finally give in to the euphoria of love, for himself and for you.

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"I'll send them off manager, don't worry!" you exclaimed to Himchan's attention as you walked out of the building and stood a few meters away from the entrance to shake hands with everyone and thank them.

The subtle breeze comforted you after the disturbing episode in the hallway, but it couldn't calm the drum solo your bloody organ was still playing as you knew you'd come to face Jooheon again. You hadn't had the chance to approach him after you had been back to the meeting room, as Jie had stood by your side all the while, his eyes telling you that he had been worried that you'd collapse at any moment, once the pressure had completely fallen down.

Your heels were stamping the pavement as you were thinking of what to say, but also wondering if you could ask the questions Jooheon had the talent to outnumber with additional ones every time you met, leaving them preys to your unending interpretation.

The man of your dreams was the last one to step out, his agent leaving the two of you on the forecourt after bidding politely his goodbyes, and before you could open your mouth to thank him properly for having protected you, Jooheon asked you :

"Are you alright?"

"I guess, thanks to you. Thank you for intervening, really" you said truthfully, and when your eyes dived into his crescent ones, your body vibrated with the familiar yet dangerous tsunami of feelings you had bottled up.

Jooheon shared that same trembling feeling as he, too, had kept many things inside for a long while, and as he was letting them out one after the other, he couldn't fight the smile curling his lips at your sight and answer.

"Good then, I'm glad to hear that" he sighed his thoughts out, before licking his lower lip. "I have a thing to be thankful for you as well."

"Me? What is it?" you questioned him with doubt lacing your voice.

"I've been practicing football again, and I wouldn't have hadn't it been for you. You might not realize it, but I wanted to thank you anyways because it has helped me a lot" he confessed.

His deep and serious tone made you scoff the embarrassment out of your body, before swinging slightly back and forth to vivify your limbs as they could melt under his stare at any moment. You felt nervous to be left alone with that new version of him, his quiet strength overhanging you.

"What does that even mean, I didn't do anything special…" you grumbled. "Anyway, I'm glad to hear that as well."

He chuckled at your reaction, and started counting the seconds passing by, his brain urging itself to find what to say so that you wouldn't part ways already.

"Can I ask you a question?" you unexpectedly spoke up another time, relieving him as you granted him a bit more time.

"Sure, go ahead" Jooheon shrugged, his palms growing sweaty because of the anticipation.

"Why did you take the job? You don't need it anymore, I mean you're back in the club" you interrogated frankly, an apparent unphased look dressing your face.

You had taken acting classes back in school, so you knew how to pretend. When you could sometimes share his emotions or read him like an open book because he was your soulmate, you had decided to take an advantage of this unbalanced situation by displaying a bit of nonchalance and distancing, so that you wouldn't falter before him as easily as in front of his resumé.

"Hmmm…" he hummed as he certainly hadn't expected this question to come out. "Should I be honest or-"

"I can tell if you lie, you know" you reminded him while waving your left hand at him with the red mark shining brightly.

"That's true… Well, let's say that my guts told me to do so" Jooheon managed to mumble while diverting his eyes from your face as it could drive him into betraying his deepest intentions.

Even though he had found pure bliss in acting recklessly earlier, his body moving and his tongue untying without warning, now that there was only the two of you he was hyperaware of his every move, scared to ruin his chance to try putting the pieces of an "us" together, or at least sow its seeds.

"Your guts…?"

You tilted your head, unsure of what it meant. Another swirl of wind flew around you and brought his scent right into your nostrils again, his presence getting more and more overwhelming.

"Yeah, my guts" Jooheon reiterated as his eyes lowered back on you with the same intensity as in the hallway, catching the legs of time that stopped running along with your breath.

He could see that you were drowning under a sea of confusion as his behavior swayed between assertive and careful of being too forward, confusing him all the same as he was hesitating about what to actually do. Hiding his feelings and himself wasn't an option anymore ; but why couldn't all of his fiery honesty just form the right words that would translate what he actually felt about you?

"Fine, see you soon then" you abruptly concluded, upset by his vague answer that was way worse than silence, and you extended your hand to send him off just like you had done with the rest of the group.

Jooheon gladly took it, but he didn't let go after a short shake ; in fact, he pulled at it in a swift move once he had sensed that you were about to question his actions, bringing you pretty close to him.

"You said you could tell when I lied…" the words trailed out of his mouth as he looked down at you with sparkly and squinted eyes. "Well, I kinda lied."

"What do you-"

Your voice suddenly got muted as the orange-haired boy snaked his way around your neck and waist with his arms, lightly squeezing your body into a hug before his head landed on your shoulder, his neck kissing your lips. You gasped, but your hands were unable to push him away, whether it be you giving in to his touch as you loved it just like you loved him, or the law tying them down to your body as it had finally gotten what it existed for : you being close to your soulmate.

"Sorry, that's what my guts told me to do as well" his voice vibrated through his chest against yours and resonated in your headwalls. " I think I missed you, Y/N. I'm too ashamed to say it straight to your face, but my guts… No, my heart is making me crave to do all sort of things today, and for the first time in a while, I know I won't regret it."

At this confession, his fingers dug a bit deeper into the fabric of your blazer. You could feel his heart beating fast against your torso, giving credit to his messy declaration that left you breathless. Your own vital organ was throbbing at the erosion of thoughts buzzing through your mind, from you stealing a kiss from him to smacking his face for being this late ; but the chills on your skin were slowly inducing that you were somehow thrilled to believe that something was actually happening. After all your efforts. After three months. After only a short reunion in the morning.

"I thought of you pretty often, as reconciliating with football was a way for me to stop living like a coward waiting for things to get better without working on it at some point" he acknowledged. "And I thought it was strange that I couldn't move on, so I wanted to see you again to sort things out, and that's the answer I've got… I just couldn't part ways another time without being honest with myself and with you, for once. I just needed you to know, that I missed you."

"Why do you want me to know that" you finally answered in a monotone, your voice muffled by his body against yours, and Jooheon adjusted his arms around your frame so that you could properly speak.

Your breath on the material of his clothes still sprawled ticklish sensations all over his skin like ants going down his limbs, and he almost hissed at the flustering sensation.

"Because I'm tired of thinking about you with regrets filling my mind" he finally straightened himself to gaze properly at you in the eyes, his arms still resting loosely on your body. "I know I told you not to wait for me, I hope you didn't… And I don't know who that man is to you… But I'll have to try my best to listen to this raging dude if I want to be proud of myself one day"

He patted the left part of his chest, releasing your shoulders from his hold, and it immediately felt cold. You had missed him too; your colleagues could testify. And for a long while, you had wished for this moment to happen, him coming back to get you with eyes full of regrets and apologies as he'd have realized that he liked you back and that it was worth the try.

The overwhelming sensations you went through at the listening of his speech suddenly spilled through the edge of your fingers that hurried themselves up his shoulders, to his neck, before they reached his face, and pulled him into a kiss. A long, insistent, needy press of your lips against his ; the only way to put an end to his confusing rent and to your panicked thoughts plaguing your mind.

You had been dying to kiss him since the first time you had met him in the club, and after your last one, just while thinking of him ; now that you were doing it again, it seemed that you'd never get enough of him, never enough to fill in the void he had left up 'til now.

When his lips started moving against yours to kiss you back again and again with the same need, upgrading to another rhythm, Jooheon felt like he was getting dangerously closer and closer to abandoning himself to his euphoria again, so he forced himself to pull back, leaving you with your eyes closed.

"I like you, Y/N" he breathed out. "I like you, but I want to take it easy. I've hurt you."

You finally grasped what had happened, what your body had decided to do on its own, how your bottled feelings for him or maybe the powers of the law had taken over your faculty to think rationally or even control yourself ; and that was when Kihyun's words from three months ago resounded with the most power into your eardrums.

"You know, when you date your ideal, you almost forget how it actually feels to love at first. I swear, the sensations you get almost turn into a drug, something you can never get enough of! You immediately love the person without even knowing him or her, and you're in such a bliss, in such an awe, that you can't even distinguish what your real emotions are anymore. It took me a break with my girlfriend to look back on what I feel, what I love in her, and to miss her but because my heart felt empty, not my entire self."

Burning with your desire for him, craving for his touch when he had barely hugged you, kissing him with a despair you hadn't been able to contain, wishing for it to never stop and only seeing and feeling him ; all the emotions crashing down on your being were too much to handle at once, so much that you got scared of yourself.

All along, you had been sure that you liked – no, loved him, and that the empty feeling you had gone under painfully could be explained by the power of love before the one of the law. However, right now, you couldn't decipher where the origin of your rushed, needy actions and of your emotions lingered : was it really from your heart that pounded in your chest as its fluttering was finally reciprocated? Or from the law that had made you fall for Jooheon in the first place and now stimulated your body to the point that it felt like you weren't mastering it anymore, because it was satisfying its purpose?

You were suddenly terrified of what Jooheon actually made you feel, instead of enjoying the bliss they all had talked about ; when his feelings were genuine as he wasn't tied to you by the law, the intensity of your excitement shone the confusion Kihyun had talked to you about in your blurred spirit. You needed to tame and sort these new emotions out, before you'd get pervasive and lose yourself and him a second time.

"I-I'm sorry" you only managed to stammer as you pushed his hands away from you, before taking a step back, then another one.

"Y/N, wait let's-"

"You needed time, now I need mine" you cut him as you were getting closer and closer to the building. "I was only wishing for this to happen, but… I-I don't know what I'm feeling right now I need to go"

"Wait just stay let's talk it out I have so much to-"

"I'm sorry, I don't know what's wrong with me but I just can't be with you any longer" you finally sobbed your frustration out and without looking at him, your eyes glued to the pavement where you had searched for your sanity in vain, you turned around and disappeared behind the glass doors.

Jooheon clutched a hand at his heart beating way too loud for him to think clearly, the palm of his left one burning after your passionate kiss. And for the second time, he had to watch you walk away without having the chance to hold you back into another moment where the blooming of an "us" was waiting for the both of you to water it at the same time.

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A/N : thank you again for having read it up ‘til now, I’m doing my best to continue writing the ending part through my schedule!

[cinaja]

Before the Wall Part 3

For the entire series and the summary, click here

Is anyone reading this? If so, please give me a sign! This is my first time posting a story and I'd love some feedback

Disclaimer: characters, world etc. belong to Sarah j. Maas

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There is another desert. Great. Simply great. Sometimes, Miryam wonders if fate hates her.

But in a small town on the edge of the sand, a Fae female with a bad cough that she is treating tells her about the human rebels who have set up their camp just on the other side of the sand. The female means it as a warning, but Miryam has to lower her head to hide her smile.

"I mean it", the female insists, "You may be part human, but you are also half Fae and these people won't like that."

This worries Miryam more than she wants to admit. But she swore a vow to save her people and another one to be kind, to help others - and for both, she needs the rebellion.

So she spends her last coins on a camel and sets off.

On the first day, she runs into a pack of Martax and almost gets eaten (again). On the second day, there is a stabbing pain in her lower body. Closer inspection reveals that she is, apparently, on her period. (Of course. Of course she gets her first bleeding while stuck in the middle of a desert. It`s just typical.)

On the third day, she runs out of water. She was supposed to reach an oasis that day, but it is dried out. She guesses it is a side effect of thirst (or maybe of the heat) when she starts seeing strings of light, running through the air and over the ground. She blinks and they are gone.

On the fourth day, she falls asleep in the shadow of a sand dune and wakes up in a small cabin. Miryam jumps to her feet - and slams into a wall of hard air. Around her, there is are symbols drawn on the wooden panels. Forming a perfect circle and trapping her within.

Miryam has seen those symbols before. For a moment, she thinks that she`s still asleep and this is another nightmare. But something tells her this is very real.

"You know", a voice drawls behind her, "this would have been much easier for you if you had stayed unconscious.

Miryam spins around and comes face to face with a High Fae female. In her hands, she holds an ancient-looking book bound in black leather.

The female is a witch

Fear shoots through Miryam. This can't be happening. Not when she was so close to reaching the rebellion. For a moment, Miryam thinks that she sees the strings of light again, wrapping around the witch, running through the air. But they vanish as quickly as they appeared

The witch raises her hands and smiles at Miryam. "You should consider it an honour, girl. Your life will be used for something greater."

Miryam doesn't beg for mercy. She knows there won't be any and spent her entire life on her knees - she won't die that way, too.

The witch begins chanting

Miryam can feel the magic, wrapping around her body. Burning, searing. (This is what her mother must have felt in her last moments). She raises her hands, like she might ward of the looming death.

The lights are back. Strings of light, wrapping around her. Miryam pushes against them and something inside her rises up, up, up.

Burning pain.

Her body is on fire. It hurts. Hurts so badly she thinks she may be dying. She leans to the sides and retches up blood.

Somehow, she manages to sit up.

Around her, the house is reduced to cinders. Where the witch stood, there is nothing but a pile of ashes on the ground. The book is still there, untouched, but everything else is destroyed. But the strings of light are still there, fainter but clearly visible.

It is impossible. Miryam should be dead - worse than dead.

She wants to laugh, but she only manages a broken sob. She knows enough about witches from her time in Ravenia's court to understand what it means that the female is dead and she is still alive. What those strings of light mean and why they appeared just when she bled for the first time.

Miryam is a witch.

It has to be some kind of sick joke by whoever decides these things - maybe the Cauldron. She has seen such unspeakable horrors inflicted by witches and witchers - on humans, on her people - and she...

Stumbling, Miryam gets to her feet. She doesn’t know why, but she takes the book when she staggers outside. (Maybe she knows it is too dangerous to just be left lying around. Or maybe some small part of her understands that she will still need it.)

Through some stroke of luck, the stable is still standing and inside, she finds her camel standing next to two horses. The animals look up when she enters. They stand frozen, staring at her.

She puts the book into the saddle bag next to the one on healing. It feels wrong, death and life together. The animals still watch at her, without an inch of fear. It`s not natural. But Miryam once heard that witches can talk to animals. Maybe it is true, after all. She unties the horses.

"Go north", she tells them, "that's the way out of the desert." Then, she climbs into her camel's saddle.

She decides right then and there that those powers might be evil, but she is not. And she won't use them. Not now and not ever. So she locks them away, right alongside all that pain and the memories she cannot face, the past she chose to leave behind

(Years later, Miryam will look back and wonder what would have happened if she had chosen differently. If it would have saved her all the pain that later came with realising that there is no way to lock away parts of yourself forever - or if it would have broken her to face these things right there.)

During the following days, she begins to understand that choosing that she doesn't want to be a witch doesn't mean that she stops being one. The strings are everywhere. She doesn't understand what they mean, but they. Drive. Her. Crazy. Then, there are the animals. Snakes, hares, even bugs - all of them suddenly approach her without an inch of fear.

"Go away!", Miryam yells at them, "I don't want this!" But if they do understand, they certainly don't listen.

Finally, burning sand gives way to soft grass and trees. Miryam ties her camel to a tree and runs her fingers through the grass. She smiles. Now, she just has to find the rebellion, then everything will be fine.

She takes the rest of her food out of the saddle bag and sits down, back leaning against a boulder. Just as she is about to take a bite of the hard cheese, the forest around her goes silent. Miryam is on her feet, knife in her hand, in a second. Quickly, she climbs onto the boulder.

Three Naga burst into the clearing. There is a dark shimmer around them, like an aura. The first Naga takes a step forward - and collapses, the tip of an arrow pointing out of his throat. An Ash arrow.

Another arrow goes flying and hits a second Naga in the shoulder. The faeries whirl, snarling, just as three people appear out of the bushes. Two men, one woman.

And all of them human.

The Naga, surprisingly, don't stand a chance. A few seconds and they are all dead. One of the human men, old enough that his blond hair is already streaked with gray, is down as well with a nasty slice over his stomach. His companion, brown-haired and handsome, kneels next to him, while the woman now has an arrow pointed at Miryam

"What is a pretty little faerie like you doing here?", she asks sharply.

But the brown-haired man looks up. His eyes slide from Miryam's face to her arm, where here sleeve slid up to reveal the brand on her arm. His eyes widen slightly, but his tone is light as he says: "You know, Tia, sometimes you can be shockingly blind. Can't you see that she is partially human?"

He stands up und jerks his head at the woman - Tia - who lowers her bow and takes his place at the injured man's side.

"Are you going to come down from that rock, or do you need me to help you?", he asks mockingly.

Miryam scowls at him and clims down. Her camel is pulling at its rope, but as soon as she puts a hand on its side, it calms down.

"Thank you. For your help", she says.

"You`re welcome. Although I do wonder what you are doing here. This isn't the safest region." He is younger than Miryam thought at first, five years older than her at most

"I survived worse”, she says.

The man glances at the brand on her arm again. "I can imagine."

But Miryam's attention goes to the injured man, who is now groaning in pain. "Someone needs to take care of that wound or he won't live another hour”, she says and starts searching her saddle back for her supplies

"You know anything of it?", Tia asks, but her eyes are full of hope

Miryam nods and kneels next to the injured, inspecting the wound. "I need some water", she says and Tia goes running

"I was looking for the rebellion", Miryam adds, in answer to the man's earlier question, "You wouldn't know anything about it, would you?"

He laughs softly. "Oh, I most certainly do. I just happen to be the leader of this particular group." He sketches a mocking bow. "Jurian, at your service."

----

Note: Like I said, more action this time. Miryam being a witch (or having any power at all) is not canon, but this headcanon is a particular favourite of mine and it doesn't contradict any of the information we have on her. Actually, there are some hints about her having certain abilities that I might just do a post on later

The next part will be about the beginnings of the War in other places: In the Night Court, Rhysand's father visits his son in the Illyrian camps for the first time in centuries and on the Continent, tensins are running high while Prince Drakon tries to deal with the fallout of his broken engagement

Edit: It just occurred to me that I don't think I ever specify Jurian's age later on (kind of forgot, oops), so I just wanted to make it clear here that he is NOT actually five years older than Miryam. I thought they'd have an age gap of 1.5-2 years, no more.

[kenzieam]

Not Happening, Doll - Chapter One (Bucky X Levi)

Rating: M (language, violence, eventual smut, angst)

Genre: Drama/Angst

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I KNOW, I KNOW!!! I HAVEN’T FINISHED ALL MY PENDING STORIES AND HERE I AM STARTING A NEW ONE… I CAN’T HELP IT, LOL. COME ALONG FOR THE RIDE.

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Levi and Bucky cannot stand each other (or rather, the former Winter Soldier cannot stand to be around the Avenger’s newest member and, like the ass he is, he won’t divulge why) and of course, they get teamed up for a new mission. It’s deep cover this time and not only do they have to work together, they have to pretend they’re MARRIED.

Heaven help them….

****************************************************************************

“No.” The declaration was so abrupt that even Tony was stunned silent. Finally, he managed a disbelieving, “No?“

Bucky nodded once; eyes stubbornly fixed to a corner of the room that nobody currently was occupying, arms crossed firmly across his massive chest.  

“What-the-fuck-why?” Tony asked, voice hardening.

Bucky shrugged, glancing up once to briefly meet the glare of the woman he was referring to. “She’s too new, too green.”

Levi snorted derisively, rolling her eyes so hard Steve worried she’d just seen her brain and he was plagued with a similar impulse.  

“She’s new to us, not this line of work.” Tony’s voice was sharp now, warning the former assassin who only shrugged again, drawing a low snarl of anger from Levi.

“What the hell is this bullshit, Barnes? I gotta bleed for you first? Gotta pass initiation?” Levi’s violet eyes were incandescent, blazing with fury and indignation and Steve wondered idly if she would simply launch herself over the table at Bucky. This wasn’t the first time Bucky had questioned Levi’s abilities in front of the team, but it was the boldest.

“I’m not babysitting-”

“Oh, fuck you Barnes! Who the fuck kicked your amnesiac ass just yesterday in training, huh? Me!” Levi slammed her fist down on the table for emphasis then abruptly turned her attention back to Tony. “I’m not going to work with someone who doesn’t trust me.”

Tony sighed. “I need you to. Nat’s cover might be compromised and I can’t pull Wanda; unless Frosty and Steve are willing to play a gay couple, it’s on you.”  

Levi’s full lip curled and she fixed her blazing glare back on Bucky. “I’ll go, but send me with someone else who’s not a peckerhead.”

Steve had to disguise his sudden snort of laughter with a cough, rolling his chair away to face Clint and Nat. Nat was still disgusted at being grounded, her arms crossed over her chest, while Clint snort fresh coffee out his nose and proceeded to howl like he’d just been hit with an electric cattle prod, prompting Sam to laugh so hard he started choking and needed Steve to whack him on the back. Bucky just glowered; his expression a mix of begrudging amusement and boredom.

Tony shook his head faintly, glancing upwards to implore for strength. “It has to be him; he’s got the most experience with this type of infiltration work. We need absolute secrecy and camouflage to be successful.”

“And we have to pose as a married couple?” Levi clarified. At Tony’s nod, she rolled her eyes again and shot finger guns at Bucky. “There’s no way Captain Siberia can pull that off, affection? Shit, we’ll be blown inside a day.”

Anger joined the boredom in Bucky’s eyes, and something else Steve couldn’t immediately identify. His mouth opened in rebuttal but Steve didn’t wait to hear what came out.

“Stop it.” He commanded. He glared for emphasize at both Bucky and Levi, but let his gaze soften with her. It was no secret that Bucky had made Levi’s transition into this team as rocky as possible and this was finally going too far, even for the benefit of the doubt Steve often seemed to extend his oldest friend’s way. “This is the way it has to be. Bucky, you’re the most experienced in this; Levi, you are more than capable. I know you haven’t had too many opportunities to prove yourself with us yet, but I’ve read your jacket, you can handle this assignment all day.”

Bucky’s face went hard, his eyes darkening. Abruptly he stood and stormed from the room.

“Briefing in an hour! Wheel’s up in three!” Tony bellowed at his retreating back. The slamming door was his only answer.

Steve exhaled and forced a smile as Levi turned to look at him. She raised a brow.

“He’ll come around.” Steve offered weakly and Levi snorted, pushing sharply at the table to spin her chair away.

******************************************************************************************

“You proud of yourself?” Steve demanded, poking his head into Bucky’s room. He only grunted in answer, shoving supplies into a tactical duffel.  

“What is your problem with her, Buck? Levi’s got this-”

“Just drop it; punk.”

“No, I’m curious.” Steve strode past Bucky and flopped down onto his bed, resting his folded arms behind his head; crossing his feet at his ankles he fixed his oldest friend with a baleful eye. “Enlighten me. What is it about Levi that rubs you the wrong way?”

Bucky only sneered, disappearing into his bathroom.  

“She’s enhanced too.” Steve began. “Is that the problem? She’s the last experiment tied to Howard Stark, is that it? She’s new to us but not to this line of work. Fury trusts her; hell, we all do, why don’t you?”

“Why do you?” Bucky shot back; reappearing from the bathroom. “Who knows what SHIELD had her do, all her files were destroyed, why?”

“What about you?!” Steve demanded and was immediately ashamed when Bucky flinched at his words. “We going to start judging people based on their past now? Where does that leave you?” He snapped his mouth shut, already hating himself for going there. “All I mean is, you’re better than your past, and nobody holds it against you; why can’t you give her the same courtesy?”

Bucky fixed Steve with a dark, heavy, hateful glare. “Glass houses, right?” He spat, his voice dripping venom and pain.

“Buck, c’mon-”

“Whatever.” The former assassin stormed out; jaw clenched.  

The briefing was tense. Bucky glowered at nobody and nothing while Levi listened with a grave intensity, flicking occasional glances at Bucky before returning her attention to the information. The mission, while simple, was delicate. Bucky and Levi were going deep undercover, posing as a married couple, to infiltrate and observe a curious abnormality in a small industrial community. It was the type of place where a large corporation had moved in and all but bought the town; most of the residents were employed in the corporation itself, while the rest depended on the worker’s business to survive. The company had been going on a hiring spree in recent months, enlarging its work base to almost double and deep digging had discovered suspicious ties to murky industries overseas, blank parent companies with flowery bullshit names that, if you dug even further, stunk of HYDRA.  

Bucky, to his flat curiosity, was to play a stay-at-home husband, a man who worked from home on computers (children’s book illustration, to Sam’s intense amusement) and rarely left the house while Levi would be the one to actually begin working at the company. While Levi worked to burrow her way into the dealings at the corporation, Bucky would spend his days sneaking around like a thief, planting bugs and wire-taps in the neighborhood that he would then be able to monitor in real time from almost directly on top of.  

The corporation was too legally backed and too savvy to be taken down by anything resembling a government or law enforcement tied investigation and so the here they were, ready to dive in, the old-school way.

“Your backgrounds have been sent to your tablets, memorize them; we’ve got everything up to and including how much the tooth fairy gave you as a kid. Your entire life is there if someone gets suspicious and starts digging.” Tony explained, rubbing his forehead wearily.  

“Did I miss something? Why is nobody asking why we’re sending a former HYDRA agent directly into a suspected snake pit?” Levi broke in suddenly, her voice hard. “I mean, the guy’s a cyborg, it kinda makes you stand out in a crowd.”

Ashamed anger flared in Bucky’s eyes and his lip curled involuntarily. Tony shifted uneasily in his chair, clearly wishing that Levi hadn’t brought up such a sticky point. Steve tensed, ready to intercept if things suddenly turned violent, dimly noting that the rest of the team was doing the same around him. Levi continued to stare levelly at Bucky, one brow raised and Steve admired her balls, they definitely clanged.  

“We don’t really have a choice. We can’t risk an in and out type surveillance, that’s why we gotta go old school. We need someone with the most experience at deep cover and Barnes here has made a living, involuntary as it may have been, at being invisible. He’s also got the real-time experience to evaluate and make determinations on what he picks up, without having to send out communications that might get detected or intercepted. And you’re new enough to the team that no one tied to HYDRA should recognize you. It’s a definite risk but one we need to take.” He paused then and winced as he continued. “Which is also why you have to cut your hair and dye it before you go, Barnes.”

“WHAT?!” Bucky exploded, leaping to his feet.

“Well, Lev’s got a point. Your arm you can hide, that shaggy, greasy mess you call hair, right out there to see.”

“When were you going to tell me this?!”

“You would have known this if you’d read the jacket earlier but you chose to storm out like a toddler.” Tony snapped and Steve groaned quietly. This was falling to shit awfully fast. Bucky was already chafing on a number of points, chiefly being working with Levi, followed closely with being stuck as the mole, burrowing around in the background like vermin and demanding he cut his hair was probably going to be the proverbial straw.

“Your wardrobes are being sent ahead with the ‘moving company’ to the house, you need to fit the preppy style chosen for you.”

“Preppy?!” He thundered, nearly apoplectic now. “I gotta be-” he paused, then spat the word. “A millennial?”

At this, Tony finally had the grace to look temporarily sheepish. “Starbucks chic.” He shrugged, cockiness returning.  

Tony had a death wish, that was the only explanation. Salvation, however, came from an unlikely source.

“Save your energy, Barnes. We gotta get going.” Levi cut in; her voice surprisingly soft. She ran a hand regretfully through her own auburn mane, and looked over at where Bucky stood, chest heaving, fists on hips. “I have to dye my hair too, and wear ‘vegan leather’ or some shit.” She stood then with a heavy sigh, gathering the tablet and folder of information in front of her, holding them to her chest. She met Bucky’s glare again, but surprise had drifted into his eyes now, his lips slightly parted. “C’mon, husband. Escort your wife to the beauty salon.” She turned to address Steve. “Meet us in the hanger in an hour?”

Steve nodded, surprise making him dizzy as Bucky seemed to cave, heaving an almighty sigh before gathering his own materials and storming after Levi, pausing only long enough at the door to whirl and give Tony the bird.  

*******************************************************************************************

An hour later, a Seattle metrosexual and his vegan-leather clad wife marched into the hanger, walking close enough to fool a layman into thinking they were friendly with each other, as long as you ignored the sparks of banked anger and resentment flashing in their eyes every time they happened to meet.  

Bucky was now blond, sporting the uber trendy slicked-back undercut and clearly uncomfortable in fitted khakis and a body-hugging long-sleeved, navy blue sweater. Levi was only slightly less uncomfortable with a harsh geometric bob in unrelieved black, skin-tight jeans and white, deep-v necked, button-down men’s shirt, the sleeves rolled up and left unbuttoned half-way down to her navel.  

Steve bit his lip to keep from laughing. They had an hour and a half quinjet flight, followed by a two-hour drive with Steve to a safe house, then another hour and a half drive without him further to their new ‘neighborhood’ to get comfortable and learn all the shit on their tablets. And to eighty-six this distance between them, not even trendy hipster couples practiced this level of ‘anti-love’.

Bucky glared daggers at Steve, correctly reading his amusement and stormed up the ramp. Without a word he threw himself into the rear-row seat; Levi watched him mildly before looking at Steve and offering a faint smile.  

“Think we have a chance?” She asked.

Steve fought a grimace. “I’m not worried about you, I mean, I am… but you can take care of yourself…. I’ve never seen Buck this wound up though.”

“He really doesn’t like me, does he?” There was a definite edge of sadness in her voice and Steve reached over, slinging an arm over her shoulders and pulling her close, pressing a quick kiss to her forehead.  

“I don’t know what his problem is. He won’t tell me, and I’m worried what I said to him made it worse.”

“I doubt that, he respects you too much.” She paused, a little uncomfortably, then added. “We should get going.”

Steve nodded and turned, pulling Levi with him up the ramp and depositing her gently in a seat across from Bucky, to her faint amusement. Her smile however, faded when she slipped into the seat and remembered her ‘husband’ glowering at them both. Pulling out her tablet from a trendy over-sized tote, she smiled gamely at Steve while he strode further to the cockpit then turned her attention to reading her fictional past.  

With an aggravated sigh, Bucky yanked his out and began to do the same, glaring smoking holes into the screen.  

Steve barely held himself back from an only semi-ironic Hail Mary before beginning throwing the magic switch.

*******************************************************************************************

Levi stayed valiantly in her seat, despite the storm cloud next to her, and continued to memorize her story during the remainder of the flight. At times she’d feel Steve’s eyes on her and would glance up, grinning when they made eye contact, usually looking away in chagrin when a low growl from beside her would remind her that she wasn’t alone with the blond man.  

“Should be on this mission with him.” Bucky grumbled irritably. “Punk already looks metro.”

Levi rolled her eyes, taking a deep breath and praying to the fates for strength. Jesus Christ. “You are far from my dream partner too, Barnes. You think I want to spend the next how many months stuck with you? Pretending to…” she swallowed and while she didn’t really mean it this way, it looked like in revulsion, “love you? Dream on. The biggest asshole in the Compound and he’s all for me? How did I get so lucky?” Without waiting for a snarled reply, Levi deliberately pulled her knees up to her chest and turned her body away from Bucky, pointedly looking away and concentrating solely on her tablet.

Ears burning, Bucky chanced a glance up at the cockpit, fought a kneejerk sneer when he saw Steve’s disapproving frown. With his enhanced ears, Steve had just heard every word and Bucky was suddenly ashamed at the disappointment in his friend’s gaze. Gritting his teeth, he returned to his reading.  

Although he would have liked the company, Steve was proud that Levi stuck it out and stayed near Bucky, seeming to have completely erased him from her radar after her last burn. She hadn’t said anything that wasn’t true, unfortunately; since the Accords and Wakanda, Bucky had been struggling. He was the black sheep of the team, rejecting most social contact and glowering from the sidelines petulantly when forced to interact. The movie nights that Steve admittedly loved with the team were always made slightly tense when the Winter Soldier was made to attend. Nat was braver than most, dragging the man out of his self-imposed cave and demanding he stay and watch with them, but Bucky rarely relaxed enough to make it worth the trouble. Most of the team just gave him a wide berth now, a courteous acknowledgement when they passed in the hallways and little else.

He was a valued member of the team, no doubt; strong and capable on missions, but he just couldn’t seem to relax and the charming, charismatic man Steve had known before the war rarely volunteered conversation anymore, or even a smile. It hurt Steve’s heart, to see him struggle like this, but he was running out of ideas on how to help. Time didn’t seem to be doing anything but make Bucky more entrenched in his self-imposed isolation and, if he was being completely honest, Steve would have preferred to sit Buck out of this mission entirely. Maybe he needed to go back to Wakanda, maybe they shouldn’t have asked for him to return to the team after Thano’s defeat.

But he was the only man on the team fluent in enough languages, and familiar with HYDRA activities; he was the only one who could watch and evaluate what he was seeing and draw on his seventy-plus years of bitter experience to act accordingly. It sucked, frankly and Steve was infinitely sorry that Levi was going to have to suffer too. The woman was smart and capable and Steve’s mind and body hadn’t decided yet if the emotions and impulses he felt near her were brotherly or something far more intimate.

A small ping from the control panel reminded him that they were close to their destination and he yelled back to his flight mates about it, smiling in delighted surprise when Levi appeared and sat in the copilot’s chair, strapping herself in.  

Bucky watched her leave, watched her give Steve the smile she never gave him, feeling an unfamiliar pang deep in his chest.

*******************************************************************************************

“Okay, what high school did I graduate from?” Levi asked, glancing over her shoulder, quizzing her fictional husband.

“Thomas Jefferson High, Denver Colorado, home of the Spartans.” Bucky intoned, bored from the back seat.  

“My first dog?”  

“Mutt named Harvey, ran over when you were seven.” Bucky sighed dramatically.

“My apologies, your Highness.” Levi snarked. “Just making sure you read your homework.”

Bucky leaned forwards suddenly, poking his head between Levi and Steve’s shoulders. They’d been driving for less than an hour, but it seemed like forever. “Your full name is Madison Elise Jaeger-Harper, born June 2, 1994. Your mother was a whore who left the family when you were seven. Your step-monster was okay but definitely favored her own kids over the steps. You worked your sweet little ass off and graduated high-school early, which is the reason you’re so young and packing two majors-”

“And then I married a pompous, grouchy asshat and that’s how we ended up here!” Levi snapped, then whirled suddenly and grabbed at Bucky’s collar. Steve wasn’t sure if she was just that fast, to catch the Winter Soldier unaware, or if the man had let her, but it hardly mattered at this point. Levi yanked Bucky closer, their foreheads nearly touching and hissed, her voice so low and venomous that even Steve felt a cold finger trail down his spine.

“Listen here, Barnes.” Levi spat, nearly vibrating in fury. “This is not my dream assignment either, but if it somehow keeps HYDRA from infiltrating our world further, then I’ll do pretty much anything, even work in close proximity with you. But this is it, this is where this stops. Spit out whatever it that you hate so much about me and then get THE FUCK OVER IT. So help me, we are not going to blow this assignment because we can’t be professional!” Her eyes bored into his, her breathing heavy. “Well? Say it?!” Bucky only glared in return, fists clenched, his breathing just as labored. For the briefest moment, his eyes flicked down to Levi’s lips then back to meet hers, narrowing with anger.

With surprising strength, but not really surprising, Steve reminded himself, Levi was enhanced with almost the same serum as he was, Levi pushed Bucky away from her, the sound his back made when it hit the seat a loud crack. Both parties continued to glare at each other before Levi growled and broke the staring contest, turning around to glower out the windshield.

“Okay, that’s it.” Steve declared. He pulled the vehicle sharply over to the side of the road and threw it into park, whirling in his seat to face sideways. He leveled a stare at both teammates, until they looked away, cheeks reddening.  

“We need this to work.” He snapped. “We need to find out just how deep HYDRA goes in this town. I fought Tony on this to send someone, anyone else but you two, but I lost. So you both need to get this out and dealt with-”

Suddenly, Levi threw open her door and stormed out, marching angrily away. The whole car vibrated with the slam. They’d managed to pull over near some type of rest stop and Levi climbed onto a weathered picnic table a couple dozen feet away, in profile to the two men. Drawing her knees up to her chest, she rested her chin on top and stared forwards into the trees beyond the rest area, chest still heaving. Tears poured freely from her eyes now, even as fury continued to blaze from them.

Steve stared at her for a long moment, then flicked his eyes up to the rearview mirror. There were too many emotions on Bucky’s face right now to name all of them, but predominant in his eyes was discomfort and shame. Finally, when Levi had finally broke and cried, it had finally reached him.  

“Fix this.” Steve snapped.  

His oldest friend’s eyes flicked to his in the mirror for the briefest instant, then down and away. Bucky heaved a deep sigh, not in irritation, but seemingly to get up his courage. He nodded once, silently, then exited the vehicle, walking slowly towards Levi, his hands jammed into his pockets.  

Steve watched silently as Bucky approached, saw Levi remain silent and unmoving as Bucky paused and called her name quietly. After a pause, he stepped closer and leaned against the picnic table, a safe distance from Levi, and crossed his arms over his chest, staring out at the trees with her.

*******************************************************************************************

“Levi… I’m sorry.” Bucky murmured, when a few minutes had passed and she still hadn’t acknowledged his presence.  

She remained silent and Bucky continued, shame making it hard for him to breathe. He hated to see someone else cry, to know he was the cause.  

“I… I can’t tell you right now what bothers me so much, I’m not even sure myself but… you’re right, Steve’s right. We need to do this; we need to be professional.” He exhaled and uncrossed his arms, grimacing as he rubbed the back of his head and felt freshly-shaved hair.  

Levi stared forwards for so long that Bucky was tempted to move his hand in front of her eyes, to see if she hadn’t fallen into some kind of catatonic state but he held back, biting his bottom lip, his arms crossed again, not it anger, but in defense, to ward off the chill that Levi’s emotions seemed to super-charge the air around them with. His shoulders hunched and he began to worry that he truly had broken something in her this time, that she would never willingly communicate with him again-

Levi turned her head soundlessly and fixed him with her amethyst gaze. “I’m doing this for the team, not for you.” Her voice was flat. “I’ve done deep cover before too, with SHIELD. I can play the part, can you?” There was a chilling lack of emotion in her voice that struck somewhere deep in Bucky, in a way he didn’t understand fully. She waited until he swallowed and nodded in return before pushing off the table and standing in front of him.  

She held out her hand to him, but the smile on her lips didn’t reach her eyes. “Hold my hand, husband?” There was an edge and a challenge in her tone and whereas before Bucky might have felt a need to bite back, the genuine sorrow she’d let him glimpse softened his reaction. He took her outstretched hand, gave it an experimental squeeze. Levi tensed only briefly before returning the action and Bucky laced his fingers with hers, an involuntary move that made him hesitate a beat, as he waited for Levi to reject it.

Her smile softened a bit, but still didn’t reach her eyes. She moved soundlessly beside Bucky as he guided her back to the vehicle and opened the door for her. Steve waited, reaching over to rest his hand on Levi’s shoulder, searching her eyes when she looked at him. His eyes tracked Bucky as he slid into the back seat, then moved back to Levi’s, asking a silent question of her with a raised brow.

Levi nodded in return and the smile she gave Steve did reach her eyes. “Let’s go.” She murmured, then reached for her tablet. “Okay Barnes,” she called back as Steve shifted into drive. “Test me now.”

[jamkookies]

Jealous, much?

Description :  A trip to Malta for the shooting of Bon Voyage seems peaceful enough until the moment things take an unexpected turn...

Word count : 3k

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You just wanted to wake up in peace for once.Was that too much to ask? For the second time in a row, the booming knocks on the door wipe off any remaining traces of sleep from your eyes. But still, you can't help but smile when you see who's laying beside you. Jungkook's chin rests on the top of your head and your arms are linked behind his back like he was your own personal pillow.

Being a heavy sleeper, he doesn't even  stir from the loud noise making the door almost come off its hinges. However, it only takes a slight move from you for him to wake up.

"Where you goin'?" he says in a groggy voice.

"Someone's at the door. Get up." you whisper.

The hand resting on your shoulder now snakes its way around your waist.

"Who cares? Let them knock all they want."

"Come on, Kook. Get up, please. They can't know you're here."

He groans lowly in annoyance but finally obeys and sits down cross-legged behind the door, hiding himself from view. You go to the door and barely open it half-way when a high-pitched voice makes you want to put your hands on your ears.

"Do you know what time it is?!"

"Good morning to you too, Val." you deadpan.

He ignores you.

"You're late. The shift was supposed to begin ten minutes ago."

He squints his eyes suspiciously.

"You're never late."

You avoid his eyes and laugh nervously.

"Oh..umm.. I couldn't sleep last night, that's all."

Jungkook snorts behind the door.

"What was that?" Valentin's ears perk up and he tries to take a look inside your room. You cover the sound with a cough of your own.

"It was me." You cough again. "I think I have a flu."

"Well, be careful, will you? How else do you expect to work?"

Taking advantage of the fact that only half of your body is showing through the door, Jungkook tip-toes his fingers from your ankle up to your knee.

He was in the mood for teasing, you see.

You kick his hand away, earning a choked grunt, inaudible to Valentin's ears. The latter, however, notices your jerk movements.

"Y/N, are you okay? You're acting a little strange."

"These."

Kick.

"Damn."

Kick.

"Mosquitoes."

You pretend to scratch your leg, and pull off a grimaced expression.

"They're all over the place, I know." Valentin says. "Anyway, hurry up and get ready. The manager's gonna be pissed."

"All right. I'll be there in a minute."

Valentin pivots, about to leave, but you stop him.

"Oh and Val? Next time, send someone else to call on me. I don't have to see your ugly face first thing in the morning."

He sticks his tongue at you and proceeds to walk down the hall, unbothered. As soon as he's out of sight, you shut the door  roughly and whirl on Jungkook.

"What was that for?"

His eyebrows scrunch up and his eyes widen innocently.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

You grab a cloth lying on the floor and throw it at his face. When the cloth slides down, you see a devilish smirk on his lips.

"Go to your room now before someone sees you." you warn him. "I have to work."

Your words make him look genuinely sad.

"But I don't wanna leave." he whines.

"I'm already late, Jungkook. Plus, I have to change so if you please.." you gesture to the door.

"Okay then, go ahead and change." he gleefully says and doesn't even move.

You're starting to get impatient.

"Out, Kook."

"Fine, I'll leave," he says and you almost sigh in relief, when suddenly, he continues. "But only if you give me a kiss."

This boy was in for a beating.

"Okay." you simply say.

Apparently, he didn't think you would give in so easily, as his lips shape in a surprised "O".

You close the distance between the two of you and just as he is about to loom over you, you reach on your toes and give him a quick peck on the cheek.

"Wait, that's it?" He stares at you incredulously.

"You never said what kind of kiss." you explain.

"You little-"

"Out."

The boy plants his feet stubbornly on the ground, but you pull his shirt under your fists and drag him to the door.

"Look, Kook-"

"Heh, that rhymed." he giggles.

"Shut up."

You sigh in frustration, feeling suddenly conflicted.

"Look, Jeon. You probably think I push you away on purpose, playing hard to get and all that, but I don't. If it were for me, I would literally lay down here with you all day."

He can't seem to believe his ears.

"That's the boldest statement I've ever heard you make." he breathes.

"Oh, I can be bold. Just not now. If they fire me, we're screwed."

He links his arms behind your back and lifts you up, burying his head on the crook of your neck.

"Sorry. Sometimes, I forget that this is serious business. But I'll behave from now on, I promise."

You caress the material of his shirt on his back, feeling the warmth of the skin underneath it. He lowers you down and there's a soft smile playing about his lips.

"And.... last night was.... nice." he says coyly.

"Nothing really happened, Kook."

"I know but..... it was enough for me."

You feel warm, fuzzy stars shooting from the bottom of your chest, splaying out like gleaming fireworks. Your hands itch to squish his cheeks affectionately, but you keep them where they are, scared you might ruin the mood.

"I can't believe I'm in love with a moron like you." you sigh dreamily.

His face lights up in a whole hearted smile.

"Beats me." He boops your nose and opens the door quietly, scanning the hall for people.

"I'll see you later." he says and blows a kiss in the air towards you.

There is nothing more hilarious than the sight of his bare legs making quick, furtive steps along the hall and when he stumbles, almost losing his balance, you clamp your hand on your mouth to hold the laughter.

What in the world had you gotten yourself into?

* * *

An endless cycle of pain and misery, that's what you had gotten yourself into.

By the time that cursed fifteen-minute lunch break came, the exhaustion of having to clean thirteen rooms in the span of just six hours had already weighed you down like a blanket of rocks. Your limbs were sore and aching and you could barely feel them. When you sit down for a minute, it's like the tiredness seeps out of every edge of your body.

It's okay.

I'm doing this for Jungkook.

I'm alright.

That's what you had been repeating in your head all day, like a mantra, desperate to keep yourself going for just  a little longer.

Holding on to the ledge of the stairs for support, you rise to your feet and make your way down.

It was 1 pm.

You had fifteen minutes to get some rest and then you were back to being Cinderella.

Before she met the prince.

"Hey, Y/N."

Liena greets you with a radiant smile when she sees you coming into the kitchen, but it turns into a frown when she notes the way you're dragging your feet.

"Inti għajjien?" she asks.

Tired was an understatement.

You felt like you'd been trampled by a herd of angry bisons.

"No." you answer, too proud to admit it.

Liena doesn't seem to believe you for a second but she nods nonetheless and offers you a bread roll . You gladly take it, munching on the milky, cotton-like texture.

"How long are you going to keep this up?" she asks in her thick accent.

You could understand most words, but she would switch to English to make it easier for you.

"Until I collect enough money." you answer.

"You are over-working yourself."

"I don't have any other choice, do I?"

Her eyes soften in a melancholic way, and you can hear the sympathy in her voice when she says. "Y/N, ħanini, you should tell him."

"He would be furious."

"As he should be. You agreed to work double time and to shorten your breaks just so he could work here."

"The manager wouldn't take him otherwise."

She sighs deeply and shakes her head.

"Inti stupidu."

"No, you're the stupid one." you retort.

Like a five year old.

Suddenly, she straightens up and you feel callused hands on your eyes, your vision momentarily blocked.

"Guess who it is." you hear a voice behind you.

"Hmmmm. Probably someone who is scared of microwaves?"

Jungkook's hands retract and he spins you around.

"Hey! I thought we agreed not to tell anyone about that."

"I also thought we'd agreed for you not to bug me when I'm working, yet here we are."

For a moment you scan his face, wondering if he had heard anything from your conversation with Liena, but he seems clueless. Then, your eyes dip down to his red uniform, fitting his every curve. It was a little bit too tight and you were not so sure if he was comfortable in it.

"Nice shirt." you tease him.

His hands subconsciously make an attempt to cover his front.

"They didn't have other sizes." he admits, embarrassed. "And technically, you're not working. You're on your break."

"Which, by the way ends in ten minutes." you say, looking at the clock on the wall.

"What?! That's so little."

"I've been here for like twenty minutes." you lie. "How is your first day of work going?"

"Pretty good. It's not that hard. I just carry suitcases all day."

He grabs an apple from the counter and munches on it, then offers you a bite.

"Nies diżgustanti." Liena makes a face when she sees you eat from the same apple Jungkook had.

"What? I've been living with him for five years." you cry.

Jungkook laughs.

"I thought you said he wasn't your boyfriend."

You hear the words before Valentin has made his dramatic entrance into the kitchen.

"Well..." you hesitate, but Jungkook shoots daggers from his eyes at you.

"If you're not sure about it, then I'm completely available." Valentin says and winks.

You grip Jungkook by his uniform before he can lunge for the guy. There's pure hatred on his face as he rolls his tongue on the inside of his cheek.

Was he...jealous?

"Hey, hey... relax, big guy. I'm just kidding." Val raises his palms face up in surrender.

"I suggest you leave, Val, before you lose a toe or two." you say quietly, still holding onto Jungkook's shirt.

Valentin's lanky frame would definitely not help him if he got into a fight with Jungkook. He would be crushed in seconds.

"God, what is it with these foreigners?" he huffs and retreats slowly.

Liena watches all of the scene unfold in front of her with fervent eyes. The only thing missing was a bowl of popcorn in her hands.

Jungkook's tenseness had disappeared as soon as Valentin had left but he still scrunches his fists on your shirt and pulls you to him.

"He was just kidding, Kook."

He only takes the unfinished apple and forces it into your mouth.

"Eat it." he says.

The corners of your lips perk up in amusement and you happily comply to his request. Still, deep down, you couldn't deny the guilty pleasure you felt.

So, he was jealous and protective.

Interesting.

"Come with me, I wanna show you something." you say and grab his hand.

"In here? Are you sure?"

"You pervert! I meant the cat."

"Cat? What cat?"

You pick up a slice of bread on the counter and drag him outside of the back door.

"Nochuuu, pstttt. Nochuuuuuu."

The orange-striped fluffball appears out of nowhere, its tiny legs speeding towards you. She nibbles at the food in your hands and meows in satisfaction.

"You named the cat after me?" he asks.

"I like your old nickname."

"I wouldn't mind new ones from you, though." he muses.

"Shut up or I'll tell Nochu to bite your head off."

Jungkook smiles and scratches her back affectionately, making her purr.

"Oh sh- Break's over. Gotta go!"

You don't give him time to object as you raise to your feet and hurry towards another session of inhuman torture.

* * *

You concentrate hard on putting one foot after the other.

Slow, heavy steps.

Fifteen hours.

You had been working for fifteen hours.

Goodness, how were your legs even holding you up right now? You had never imagined you'd be able to resist up to this point.

The door creaks when you turn the knob  and you lean on it for a moment before getting in. It's completely dark but you don't even bother switching the light on.

Suddenly, a pair of familiar arms envelop you in their warmth and you feel at home again.

"Are you gonna sneak in here every night?" you whisper.

"Yes."

"I figured this might happen."

"Where were you? I've been waiting for over an hou- Whoa, are you okay?" Jungkook panics when you sag into his arms.

"Yeah, I'm alright." you slur and try to straighten up a little. "Just a little tired."

Without warning, he scoops you into his arms and lowers you onto the mattress.

"You didn't have to carry me. I can walk just fine."

"Yeah, I can definitely see that."

He reaches behind you and pulls out a box filled with heart-shaped chocolate bonbons.

"Here, I got these for you." he says and hands you the box.

"Where did you get these?" you gasp, but you've already shredded the lid off and popped one in your mouth.

" I stole them from the kitchen."

You stop chewing.

"Jungkook."

"What? They were lying around anyway. That woman wouldn't take the box from her boyfriend since they got into a pretty bad fight."

"Thieving is still a sin." you say.

"Adding milk before cereal is also a sin."

"Hey, that way I know how much cereal to put!" you blabber with your mouth full but stop again after noticing how he's not eating anything. You pick up two bonbons and try to shove them into his mouth.

"I'm not hungry." he says.

"You're a living food demolisher. Now open up."

He tips his head back and laugh, cheeks stuffed with the chocolate, but in a matter of seconds his expression turns dead serious.

"Y/N, it's better if you don't talk to that Val guy. I don't like the way he looks at you."

You raise your eyebrows in mockery.

"Jealous, much?"

"Hell yeah, I am. May I remind you that you're my girlfriend?"

"I still haven't agreed on that."

"Deny it all you want. You're mine."

You choke on your bonbons.

"There's no need to be so posessive." you croak, teary eyed from the sting in your throat.

With a devilish smirk, he leans himself forward and rests a hand on your knee but you cry out in pain.

"Wh-what happened?" His playful demeanor turns alarmed, eyes flickering up and down with concern.

"Nothing. It's just my knee. I banged it on the table."

"Does it hurt?"

"A little." you admit.

"Lay down." he orders.

"Hey, now."

"I'm not gonna do anything, you idiot. Just lay down."

He cups your knee and applies pressure on it, testing it. It feels like a pair of pincers are twisting it left and right and the pain is unbearable, but you refuse to make a sound. He lightens his fingertips and starts massaging the area in round motions.

"Our trainer taught me this when I hurt my leg. " he says.

You nod, painfully remembering how miserable he had felt for not being able to dance. His absence had been evident.

"I can't wait to get away from here." he whispers, out of the blue.

"Are you already tired on your first day of work?"

"No. It's you I'm worried about. You get up early and come back in the middle of the night. I don't like it."

Your mouth tastes sour after you roll the lie from your mouth.

"I didn't work all day, Kook. I was just helping with some things."

He seems to consider your words for a moment when his phone buzzes. You'd completely forgotten about it, only now being reminded that he actually had it with him. He checks the notification and then slams it face-down on the mattress angrily.

"Who is it?" you ask.

"Namjoon-hyung. He's been asking me where I am for two days."

"Did you reply?"

"No. I don't want them to panic. It's better if they just keep going on by themselves."

You put your face in your hands and sigh deeply.

"I still can't believe you left the band for me. You're crazy."

"Crazy for you."

"That's so old."

"Old but gold."

You laugh heartily.

He smiles and glances at the phone once again.

"You know, I tried to see if I could transfer money, but it didn't work. I don't know how he did it, but that bastard has blocked every way to connect to someone."

"It's better this way." you try. "I don't know how would we explain to anyone about all we've been through."

"You're right." he says and resumes the massage in your knee.

"Does it feel good?" he asks you.

"That just sounds weird."

"You know, most of the time you take things the bad way yourself."

You scoff in displeasure.

"But it does feel nice, though." you hear yourself mumble.

His lips twitch.

"I'm alright now, thanks." you say and pull your knee back.

"Anytime."

* * *

You had trained your eyes to open up by their own accord, having to get up early but you're surprised to see a wide-eyed Jungkook staring at you intensely while sitting up.

"G'morning, Kook." You yawn and stretch your arms but he stays unmoving, not answering.

"Kook?"

Something was wrong.

"Y/N, did you convince the manager to get me the job?"