#is this was a parasocial relationship is
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#parasocial relationships#parasocial behavior#capitalism#celebrity culture#celebrity#celebrities#1k#10k
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I’ve been playing BATTD too much, I’m starting to recognize and grow frond of other usernames in the martian games
#once again I’m up against krampus#knarkdight are you out there your handle makes me laugh#jext#battd#Bloons adventure time#is this was a parasocial relationship is
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People need to stop blaming 'parasocial relationships' when it's revealed to the public that a famous person has done something controversial (or even a crime) and the public is upset. 'I can't believe xxx did that!' doesn't always mean that the person who said it has a parasocial relationship with xxx. Usually it's just our faith in humanity, we want to believe that everyone has some basic human decency (especially someone we might admire) and it's only natural to be disappointed when we learn they're a bad person.
#this is about#neil gaiman#neil gaimen allegations#not art#text#I do believe the allegations. no I haven't read the article (if someone has a link that could send me that would be superb)#but uyeah. too many people yell 'stop having parasocial relationships with famous people' when it's just that we like their 'art'#and that we feel disappointed when we learn what they did#also jk Rowling is bad too. not for the same reasons but people trying to defend her using Neil as a counter argument is wrong#civil conversation about this topic is totally ok (and encouraged) but if for some reason I receive any hate asks I don't even know...#like excuse me for assuming people aren't horrible monsters my bad
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people who are complaining about chappell setting boundaries and asking for privacy with "she's not ready to be a pop girlie yet" make me so mad. why does she have to tolerate harrasment and stalking to be a pop girlie? why is your definition for a pop girlie of someone whose private life is all out in open for you to dissect? why should you have access to her family? why should she be someone who has to nod, smile and say yes to whatever you want fuck off maybe
#i've said this before i'll say it again not everyone wants to have parasocial relationship with their fans there's a reason she has a#separate indentity when she makes art just because the bigger artists have been doing it and it's okay with them doesn't mean#every new growing artist or even the established one want it too stay away jfc#shouldn't have opened twitter lol#chappell roan#chappellsource
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you know, you know. no gods, no masters, no kings on pedestals. everyone is fallible. death of the author. you know! you are balanced about your intake of media - you allow the wiggle room, the grace, the gratitude, the skepticism. nobody above criticism.
but still. a weird gut-punch feeling, something akin to betrayal. you read the article. surprise! an author you love is actually: a serial fucking predator.
well, shit. what now. no, you knew he was a person (all people are), but now you're wondering - what have i overlooked by accident? what messages have i internalized that are strange and cruel? and also, like, what the fuck?
his actions lay a thick glaze on top of everything. like each place is now ruined, opaque in a new way. but okay, fine, you've done this before. you knew better, right? you've been betrayed by many a cherished childhood author.
still, this stickiness. fuck. can you pick up that book again. will you read it to your children. you've recommended it to others - will you ever do that again? and of course, of course, no parasocial relationships. you were theoretically above this kind of sentiment. but the artist informs the art, right.
so it's not something as clear-cut as feeling he owed you, specifically (a stranger) better behavior - just that you kind of, in a distant and odd way... sort of trusted him to do better. it's not like a real trust or something speakable, just the faint hope that the product (good books) was a thin representation of the soul. now it feels like the product (good? books?) was a mask. in some small or insignificant way, your previous support of this person lent them power. your money and your time and your laughter.
and the thing is - you have this terrible, echoing sensation. how many times will this happen? over and over. you find out that the singer you love is actually a predator. you learn over drinks that your favorite high school english teacher is in jail for what he did to her. you listen to the news idly and suddenly discover that a woman you used to idolize has been abusing her kids for an actual eon.
what can you touch without the static melting off. you can't even really complain about it too much (you were supposed to know better, and besides, you don't want the same re-split "it's not your fault, love what you love" basic advice), but now it's here. somehow, it feels like - you let him into your life.
it's not that things need to be pure or an artist has to be like, endlessly perfect, mindful. demure. it's more just this terrible truth that has been replayed through your veins so often it feels criminally vain. power corrupts, absolute power corrupts absolutely. did you want any one person to be worth that power?
it's just that he wrote books where he seemed to understand that. he seemed to know about hierarchies and unfair systems and bigotry and privilege. you thought they were books about what it means to struggle. you thought they were about having power and still using it for good rather than for control. he spooned you a narrative of being a good guy, a kind soul. you fucking bought what that fucking monster sold.
maybe that's why they were fantasies, after all.
#spilled ink#warm up#oh im .... sick to my stomach.#i talked to him. like ....... we talked. that man interacted with my poetry and writing.#that article.... gutwrenching. i am so sorry to everyone he's ever even been in the room with.#i feel.... like... unbearably. sick.#he acted like he was cool and friends with me!! we were cool internet writers together!!!!!#i feel sick for even having been polite to him.#i ...... am experiencing something so fucking complicated.#i wonder how many of u are feeling that too. like ''oh i sent him an ask and he was funny and sweet''#THATS HOW THEY GET U. ..... and YES I KNOW!!!#i am so fucking well-read about parasocial relationships. it would just be nice to like. trust that someone ISNT#hiding a huge fucking background of BEING A COMPLETE MONSTER. LIKE WHAT THE FUCK.#by the way i am not part of a fandom. this is “what the fuck i accidentally supported a rapist” not#“but my showww”. like i care far more about like. the human cost.#but also like... people are people. idk i saw a take on here about how nobody should mourn the books#and idk. people almost always reply to any scenario with their personal experience first -#''i knew him'' or ''wow i was just at that store'' or ''i grew up there'' or whatever. because that is how we establish connection &#emotional weight. that's just... a person thing. and there is a difference between 'oh this guy is a monster'' & the feeling of:#he's been a monster and i SUPPORTED THAT. i CELEBRATED him. i !!! a fucking victim myself!!!!!!!!! SUPPORTED . HIM.#i am sick. i feel so much pain for her and everyone he's ever hurt. saying ''the books are ruined'' is i think ... like how people say#they're shocked and disgusted by him. (obviously there's nuance here. im sure there's some creep doin it wrong. but u know. in general)#idk..... im an author. i understand my work is in your life in whatever small way. i understand that connection. it's real.
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We ask your questions so you don’t have to! Submit your questions to have them posted anonymously as polls.
#polls#incognito polls#anonymous#tumblr polls#tumblr users#questions#polls about sex#submitted dec 10#polls about relationships#polls about the internet#This one feels... concerning to me the blog runner lol#tumblr culture#parasocial relationships
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Hate (affectionate) how it's made so clear from the very beginning of part 1 just how loved Paul is by his family and household. Both his parents, Duncan, Gurney, Thufir, even Dr Yueh all clearly care so deeply for this kid, and we're shown that time and time again.
Cut to the end of part two, and almost every one of those people is gone. The only ones who remain are a weird, came-back-wrong version of Jessica, and Gurney who has gone from mentor to worshipper. Paul goes from someone deeply loved and valued for who he is by a small but caring group of people - to someone followed and worshipped and feared by thousands. They're obsessed with him in a way, as a leader and "messiah", but nobody loves him.
The only one remaining who loves him for who he is is Chani, who leaves him because in the end that love isn't enough to bring who he is back.
#dune#dune part 2#paul atreides#i am losing my MIND#upon rewatching part 1 it struck me just HOW loved paul is. and then you contrast that with his horde of followers in part 2#none of whom will so much as touch him when he's injured badly enough that he can barely walk#he's not human anymore. he's just an idea.#i am in physical pain#something something it's about parasocial relationships & celebrity culture#like idk if that was frank or denis' intention but. i see a bit of That.
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save me professor dekarios... save me...
#im in such a deeply parasocial relationship w him its not even a joke#gale dekarios#bg3#baldur’s gate 3#gale of waterdeep#my art#bg3 spoilers
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One thing for those who have watched The Boy and The Heron or will watch it. The Japanese title for it is How Do You Live? And Miyazaki stated he was leaving it for his grandson, saying, "Grandpa is moving onto the next world soon but he is leaving behind this film".
The deaths of contemporaries and friends such as Satoshi Kon and Isao Takahata and also the expected successor of Yoshifumi Kondo were things that have always weighed heavily on the back of Miyazaki's mind.
He recognizes the industry and the occupation for how soul crushing it was, grinding up either the spirit or the physical body of those who work in it. He loves and hates the industry he stands on the peak of and fully recognizes how it will probably be the death of him. And he knows it'll leave him unable to say a lot of things to his Grandson.
So How Do You Live? is a lesson. For his grandson. For himself. For his two sons. And probably for anyone else willing to pay attention.
Hayao Miyazaki is a flawed man that makes things so important to so many people. And I think more than any other film of his, in this you get to pull back the curtain a bit and see him at work. And what should be this giant unblemished titan can be seen for what he is, a sad old man who had higher hopes for himself and has even higher hopes for the people he makes his work for.
It's a beautiful thing to see another's humanity in their work. To look past the artifice and glam of commercialized art and find humans behind it. And humans willing to show their humanity and mortality is even rarer. And something to be celebrated. So when you watch it. Or if you've watched it already. Understand that this film is Miyazaki kneeling down, weary after years of weaving dreams and making mistakes, reaching out and saying to you that he hopes you can do better. It's an old man who's made all the mistakes of the world passing it on to you, hoping you do better, and making sure you know it's okay if you don't.
How do you Live? By making mistakes. By messing up. But still moving forward. And still reaching out.
#the boy and the heron#how do you live#hayao miyazaki#i love you old man#i know you'll be back but if we're talking to each other through screens then thanks#if the wind rises was him exposing his mistakes then this is his apology#i really dislike the popularization of ideas like “parasocial relationships” and “seperate the art from the artist” and how it seeps into#the discussion of art. While people should be maintaining a detachment from people they don't know I think blunting arts impact by not#acknowledging the human behind it is a disservice to art. And you lose the beauty behind someone as flawed as you making something beautiful
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"If you're hurt by finding out that a person you admired did something bad or are worried about the idea they might, it shows you need to not form attachments to people you don't personally know."
I have bad news for you about how literally the entirety of human socialization and the human mind work. You can say "here's a stick from off the ground. his name is Stanley and he has a loving family" and then break the stick and people will feel hurt because they formed a positive connection to Stanley. Humans project attachment onto everything. Asking people not to feel connections to other humans is not feasible. It's not possible and, if it were, it sure as hell wouldn't be healthy.
You didn't do anything wrong if you feel hurt that someone you didn't personally know did something wrong. You're not parasitic or obsessive for wanting people you don't personally know to be good people. Being devastated that someone you liked did something horrible isn't a sign you liked them too much, it's a sign you have the basic human ability to form emotional and social connections. Your responsibility is being aware of those connections and behaving in ways that are healthy, respectful, and keep you and others safe.
Trying to just not admire people or not feel a connection to other humans won't work. Focus instead on being aware of what your relationships to other people are, what actions on your part are acceptable given that level of relationship, what actions are acceptable on their part, and what level of relationship it's realistic or healthy to project. And be ready, as with all things in life, to change your views on something or someone when presented with new information, even if you have very strong emotional connections to the subject. For example: "I'd love to get a cup of coffee with the celebrity I don't know and talk with them about a film they're in. I imagine that would be nice." <- normal human emotion "I will go to this celebrity I don't know and ask them, apropos of nothing, to get a coffee with me/I expect this celebrity I've never met WILL go to coffee with me" <- Unrealistic level of projected relationship. Crosses boundaries of normal human interactions between strangers.
"I'm devastated this actor I liked was an abuser" <- normal human emotion
"I won't believe that this actor was an abuser because I like him and therefore can tell he wouldn't do that" <- Unrealistic and unhealthy level of projected relationship. Unsafe for you and others.
You can't just "not admire" people, yes, even people you don't know personally. Instead, be careful to make sure your admiration of someone doesn't affect your ability to make judgements about them.
#i don't know#I see a lot of posts that are clearly well meaning and the idea of maintaining a realistic view of your connections to strangers is solid#but they always seem to rely on this underlying shame#and this idea that it's on you to never form positive feelings because what if they're wrong#it's not sustainable and frankly it's very easy to exploit#because if your philosophy boils down to 'don't ever have parasocial relationships'#(which is impossible to begin with#since humans feel connections with everyone all the time#and any "many-to-one' relationship of performer to audience is technically 'parasocial')#it means all someone has to do to circumvent it is convince you you're more than a fan and have a closer relationship than that#which is already where the danger is#be aware of the behaviors of everyone you interact with#and ready to adjust your behavior and your views on people when you need to especially when you don't know them well#you're just going to be fighting a losing battle trying to just not care about celebrities#it's on them for doing something horrible not on you for daring to form connections with other people
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Tim has found his soulmate (not a soulmate AU, just in the like “i think we’re totally meant to be together” way). Well, okay, it’s entirely one-sided so far, but he’s sure SpecterNova will reciprocate once they’re in proper contact.
He’s already found everything he publicly can on the youtuber, but he’s still digging deeper. It’s weirdly difficult—his love must like his privacy!—but he’s making headway.
On the other end, Danny is getting nervous about the dedication of his new internet stalker. Even with Tucker’s help in setting up his online security and the scrambling effects of ectoplasm, they can tell that the person is still making progress. They don’t seem like they’re a part of the GIW, but that doesn’t mean their search can’t harm him in some other way.
He really hopes he doesn’t have to change identities again. Having to do it the first time to flee the GIW was bad enough, and he’s been liking his current life.
#ONE SIDED dead tired ship#one sided love#tim is suffering from a major parasocial relationship thing#i like tim but he’s getting thrown under the bus here#because i want to see more stories that condemn/portray negatively the stalker-y stuff that appears in a lot of batfam-x-other-person fics#and he seemed like a viable choice for internet obsessiveness#dp x dc#dc x dp#dpxdc#dcxdp#danny phantom x dc#danny phantom x dc crossover#youtuber danny fenton#or could be#streamer danny fenton#but i think the youtuber route makes more sense#because like it’d give him more room for privacy to keep off the GIW’s radar
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People forget that while yes, Hozier is some kind of heartbreakingly poetic ancient God, he is also just some random Irish guy in his 30s named Andrew
#This is NOT Hozier hate#My parasocial relationship is so strong I'd jump off a cliff for that man#hozier#andrew hozier byrne
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I couldn’t be a minecraft creator because if I was doing freaky gay roleplay with my friends and then got called siblings I would just end it all
#anyways mcyt fan culture makes me fucking insane I hate how it’s devolved into this#I bet nobody even cares about cc boundaries it’s just about being cool and parasocial with them#they don’t know you they don’t care. make their Minecraft characters kiss#they’re saying what you want them to say so they’ll stop being bombarded with annoying questions every day#also holy SHIT please stop making every woman have a familial dynamic#it’s ok for women to not always be the mom or the sister or whatever!!! it’s okay!!!!!!!#women can have relationships! why are you ignoring them and making everything about men!!!#I need to stop looking at the lifesteal fandom. I just get frustrated everytime I do
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#free.
#the heart killers#the heart killers series#the heart killers ep8#kantbison#firstkhao#first kanaphan#khaotung thanawat#gmmtv#thai bl#bl drama#yes im still here and no i will never move on#me and who im done waiting#im such a mess#my personal life may suck but at least my parasocial relationship is thriving
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Of course, she was completely missing from the "On Tour" reboot along with Spring Bonnie and Fredbear. Perhaps they considered it poor taste.
(More Info under the cut!)
So here's my final version of Cassidy for my AU! She's completely fictional, only created for the Fredbear & Friends cartoon. Though she began as a simple TV character, due to her popularity with the children of Hurricane, (and by proxy the MCI) Cassidy began to appear in the realm of the digital dead as a genuine living person. She's effectively a personification of the MCI, being a human child in a world of animatronics. She functions as both guidance and as a mouthpiece for their desires, similar to the golden Freddy kid in the movie.
Once the kids move on, Cassidy is the "demon" left haunting the halls of UCN, with the title of "the one you should not have killed" being more of a nod to each child than being about one in particular.
#While Cassidy dreams sweetly Misha has only nightmares#fnaf#art tag#au tag#cassidy fnaf#i know kasya had the craziest parasocial relationship with her#fnaf toysnhk
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ok obviously im not against to blocking celebrities and influencers that are silent about palestine but the issue of centering celebs in the palestinian liberation movement is not just when people get really annoying about proving their fav is good from one retweet.
the little blockout thing wasnt a bad idea at first- it did pressure a lot of people with platforms to speak up and whatever, but its a problem when im seeing FARRRR more posts on instagram and tiktok talking about how important blocking these random celebs is over actual news and actual gofundmes.
like seriously hundreds of thousands of lives are at stake in gaza! sure, ridicule an influencer in the comments, share a post or two encouraging people to unfollow/block, whatever. but when you get so obsessed with tracking celebrities instead of uplifting palestinian voices on the ground, fundraisers, educational content, and info about organizing, you have to ask yourself how is what your doing benefitting the movement? this isnt an opportunity for you to sit here and judge morals from the comfort of your own home just so you can pretend you're an advocate to feel better about yourself.
put your energy into something productive. there's plenty you can do to support palestine with that same effort and time.
#cant believe im making another post about this#ALSO THIS ISNT ABOUT PARASOCIAL RELATIONSHIPS#those suck but its not the point of this post#free palestine#plomegrantalk
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