#is this a ‘my friends dying wish’ or a ‘good for nothing asshole couldn’t finish his job’
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FUCKING YES!!!’
The villain laughs. “The Chosen One cannot spill blood on holy ground. I have won!” You draw your blade. “The Chosen One died the first day of our journey,” you say. “A Valet may spill blood where he pleases.”
#KILL THAT BITCH#now here’s the question#are we happy that the chosen one died#or not#is this a ‘my friends dying wish’ or a ‘good for nothing asshole couldn’t finish his job’#make them gay?#many ideas#much thanks
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So, I have an idea 👁👄👁. Who knows if it’ll be a good one, but I had a dream last night, WHERE I WAS BEING SHARED BY KAGS AND TSUKKI. Let me know if you like this idea <3 Love ur poly headcanons and I think that’s where this dream came from <3333
funny because i think about this all day every day
The Velvet Room <3
Tsukishima Kei x Reader x Kageyama Tobio
Mafia AU
words: 2.1k
Cw: choking, double Penn. In the same hole, it’s tsukishima so degradation
The Velvet Room Nightclub was a place to avoid.
In fact, you avoid even speaking about the place, as do many. Other than it being almost completely unaffordable to the general public, but just mentioning the Karasuno Yakuza was enough to scare the remaining brave souls from the doors.
You didn't really know what made them so bad, no one delves deep into the issues publicly, and apparently privately, of fear they will somehow overhear the contents of the conversation.
Your friends had already beaten into your head to stay away from the luxurious club. And there were enough bars and smaller clubs lining the city; so it wasn’t a problem to the general public.
So how did your friend and you get in the check-in line at the very club you’ve been told to avoid like a plague?
Kiyoko’s bachelorette party. That’s how you landed a stop in the most expensive place in the city. She was one of the people who always played devil’s advocate for the club. (you had your suspicions about the man she’s marrying too, not you get you wrong they are lovely people, just an enigma to the club.)
She was adamant about having her party there, saying she wanted to show you that it wasn't scary, you guys were just falling into the drama.
“You know, it does look really nice in here!” another friend whispered as you walked through the door; the hostess looked up at your group, seemingly recognizing Kiyoko at first glance, as she didn't say a word before leading you through red curtains, past the dance floor and what looked like the main bar, up the stairs to a long hallway.
Walking down the hallway you noticed the individual rooms lining the walls, no doors, the entries were of the same red cloth. You were led to the very end of the hall, pushing the red back, revealing a room with booths along the wall, circling a white table.
To the side of the room, a bar loaded with different bottles and lime slices. You had almost completely eased up on the reputation of the club, the white and LED lights lining the room sent you into a calm, relaxed view of the infamous building.
“Alright let's stop lollygagging! Let’s party!” with that you began to drink and within minutes food had arrived to your room. No worries, there was no poison in either the food or the drinks; so now you had nothing even remotely bad to say about this place, it was great!
Before you knew it, it was almost two in the morning and according to some of the girls who ventured to the outside, the club was packed. Being that you had been there since 8, it was needless to say you were growing tired; your social battery was nothing compared to some of your friends.
“C’mon, Y/n! Let’s go to the dance floor! This room is getting boring!” one of your friends was trying to pull you from where you had nestled into the booth.
“Fine, fine, calm down! I'm coming, I'm coming!” you relented, allowing her to drag you pat the curtains and onto the dance floor where music was blasting from every angle.
As you dance, your eyes move across the bodies on the floor to the people leaning on the walls lining the outskirts of the mass of people. As you drag across the couple clearly getting a bit too heavy in public your eyes meet a sharp cerulean blue.
Expecting him to turn away, you kept your eyes locked with his, disregarding the people surrounding you. Seeing that he wouldn't break our staring contest, your eyes travel from his eyes to his draped hair, down his neck, taking note of his dark three-piece suit hiding his body.
Through your examination you lost your footing, falling back crashing into a hard chest.
For the second time that night, your eyes met gold surrounded by black rims. You watched his lips curl into a scowl as he set you back onto your heels, clearly running his eyes along the curves of your body.
He returned his eyes back on your before flipping his lips into a condescending smirk, raising his chin as if he was leagues above you, “Not very balanced are we, short?” he remarked, shoving his hands into his pant-pockets.
“I was going to say thank you, but you ruined my thanks by opening your mouth.” you retorted, making a move to turn back to where you hoped your friend was still dancing, though before you could, another body was beside you.
“Stop bothering them, Tsukishima.” a deep voice rumbled from next to you, looking at it was the man from across the room; his sharp eyes now cast onto the blond asshole, who was still smirking, bigger now that this other man had stepped in, down at the both of you.
“Or what, King? Are you going to command me around like the commoner I am? Short and I were just talking, so you can butt out your highness.” Tsukishima sneered at, the king? that couldn’t be his name, and from the way he stiffened at the mention of this name, he didn't like it very much.
He was about to respond when two voices called from either side of your newly formed circle.
“Y/n!”
“Kageyama! Tsukishima!”
You knew it was Kiyoko who was calling you back towards the stairs, so you sneak a glance two where the men turned, seeing a smaller man, boy? with bright orange hair waving the two over. Hearing Kiyoko call you again, you tear your sight from the two walking away and make your way back to the room.
The events of that night still play in the back of your mind even a month later as you get ready for another pouting with Kiyoko and the hostess from that night, who’s named you learned to be Yachi, who had quickly became friends with you along with a few of your other friends.
“Won't it be awkward clubbing at the place you work?” you didn't want to force Yachi to go back, she seems to spend enough time there as it is. And if you got her to say no, you wouldn’t have to go either. It wasn't that you didn't want to have a good time, you did. It was that you didn't know if you could handle seeing Tsukishima and Kageyama again. Your body wanted it, it desperately wanted to see at least one of them again, but your mind was against the idea.
Yachi had told you about them, they were clearly part of the high rank of the Karasuno Yakuza. She explained how rude and all-around awful Tsukishima treated people, from remarks to just making fun of them. She told you about Kageyama’s bad attitude and how he was exiled from another Yakuza and was picked up for his skills.
You had to stop yourself from thinking about them for about a week before your memory began to torment you once more. You couldn’t lie; that was hot. Not that they were mafia goonies; but how confident they were walking around their club knowing what they could do at any time.
Now sitting at the main bar while Kiyoko and Yachi dance with each other on some far corner of the dance floor, you wish more people came. You vowed to stay away from the dance floor, in fear of deja vu taking its course and becoming reality.
To consumed in mixing your lime into your margarita, you ignore that body that slides into the stool next you yours.
“I was wondering when you would come back, Shortie, his Majesty interrupted us last time.” warm breath hit the shell of your ear as a too-familiar snarky voice sounded from beside you. Tsukishima pulled back, resting his head on his palm, as the bartender shoots a whiskey in his direction.
“I have nothing to say to you.” you raise your chin, imitating how he had when you first met. From the corner of your eyes, you could see his amusement clear on his face. Trying to ignore him you make a move to leave your seat.
“None of that, I’m just trying to have a conversation!”
You continue your ignorance, scanning the crowd for your friends.
“I’ll buy you food?”
“Only until we finish the food, then you leave me alone.”
Seeming content with your answer, he takes you up the same stairs, to another room on the right of the corridor.
In your former opinion, Tsukishima was actually a very good conversationalist, you hadn’t even realized that the food had been done for an hour and you had gone through more than enough drinks.
“Hinata really jumped into a fruit cart? Like in the movies? How does that even happen?” you laugh, curling yourself against his side as he mocks his friends.
Noticing he wasn’t laughing anymore, you look back up towards his face. Realizing just how close he was to you, eyes fixated on your lips, yours the same before you realize what was happening.
“I’m sorry i-”
Before you could even finish your mumbling you were pulled back into him, lips pressing on yours. Keeping your lips connected he moved you onto his lap, your straddling his waist as his hands moved to rub along your thighs.
Pulling away to breathe, you start to unbutton his white shirt, he, pushing the ends of your dress to rest on your hips, giving him a view of your red lace.
“Tsukishima what the hell-”
Kageyama’s familiar voice called from the entrance of the room, dying down when he registered what he was seeing. Frozen in place, he could see Tsukishima’s hand still making its way to the zipper of your dress. From the crook of your neck, he could see Tsukishima smirk sucking on the skin below your ear.
You tried to push Tsukishima off, not wanting to embarrass yourself further, but he held you in an iron grip acting as if nothing had happened.
“Are you just going to sit there and watch King? If so then you can just leave now.” He mocked, not straying from slipping your dress from your burning body. When you tried to respond, Tsukishima moved his finger to meet with your clothed bud.
Seeming to have made his decision, you feel Kageyama tilt your head to meet your lips. Wrapping his hands around your neck keeps you where he wanted.
“Wow you're more of a whore than I thought, totally ok with being shared by two guys, you’re fucking dripping!”
Tsukishima pulled your underwear to the side, shoving two fingers into your weeping hole, Kageyama moving his mouth to the column of your neck, opposite from where Tsukishima’s was just minutes ago.
“You’re going to take both of us, like a good cum-dump” Tsukishima sneered, pulling his cock out of it's refines, “c’mon tell me how much you love being our cum-dump.”
You couldn’t even mutter a word through Kageyama's fingers in your mouth. Before you could think, he was pushing you down onto his cock. You gave a choked moan as he lifted your hips then dropped them back onto his.
Your monetary focus on Tsukishima left you unaware of Kageyama’s escapades until you felt a hand on your back pressing you to the blond’s chest. You thought he was just going to press into your ass until you felt his tip at your already stuffed entrance.
“Wait, you can’t-”
“Shut up and take it, whore.”
Fitting them both was almost impossible, you felt more stretched than you ever had in your entire life. Tears were flowing down your cheeks, not that either of them seemed to care as they steadied in a pace, moving in sync with the other.
Eventually, you lost yourself on their cocks, you didn't know when but a hand attached itself to your clit. Your orgasm washed over you as your cum sprayed onto your thighs and Tsukishima’s pants.
Neither of them paid you any mind as they continued for another minute before stuffing you with cum.
“You might just have to be our permanent cum-dump, huh Shortie?”
“For once, I think I agree.”
#tsukishima kei#kageyama tobio#tsukishima x reader#kageyama x reader#tsukishima smut#kageyama smut#kageyama x reader smut#tsukishima x reader smut#kageyama tobio x reader#tsukishima kei x reader#kageyama tobio x reader smut#tsukishima kei x reader smut#haikyuu x reader smut#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu smut
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31. Why haven’t you kissed me yet?
college!wonwoo x reader
w.c 1.4k
warnings: angst, mentions of alcohol
note: haha hey I’m laura and I like writing angst. Tbh this took a turn I did not expect, but also this might be part of something bigger that’s coming later on this year. Let me know your thoughts please all kinds of feedback is helpful and I read everything. I hope you like it <3
ps. I edited this in a rush so I’m sorry for any mistakes.xx
masterlist || drabble game
It was stupid.
Joshua’s idea to play truth or dare was stupid. You should’ve pretended to walk away to get another drink in order to avoid the embarrassment you were currently facing, but sadly the odds were never in your favor. And the small room you were currently in with the last person you ever wanted to be stuck in a room with, was becoming stuffy and overwhelming.
It’s not like you hated Wonwoo per se. He was simply someone you didn’t care about, your feelings towards him were indifferent, didn’t matter nor did they exist.
At least that’s what you told yourself.
The unfortunate truth was that he had been someone you were secretly crushing on for all three years that you had known him. And Joshua knew this, which is why he had decided to play matchmaker when Wonwoo had picked dare over truth.
Your heart started pounding when instead of protesting he accepted his faith and extended his hand for you to take. He led you towards the vacant room at the end of the hallway, your friend’s hollering and making all sorts of incredulous comments. When the two of you were finally safe inside the simple tiny room, the only sign of life was the small black duffle bag next to the wooden wardrobe; Wonwoo let go of your hand and sat down on the twin-sized bed. While you stood by the door gripping the sleeves of your tie-dyed long sleeve, a gift from your best friend Vernon, wishing you could leave.
Five minutes had passed and only an awkward thick air of silence filled the room, until Wonwoo decided to break it. “Are you just going to stand there the entire time, you can sit down you know?”
“Oh, right.” You nodded uncrossing your arms from in front of you and sat down on the floor with your back against the door. Wonwoo scoffed and leaned back on his elbows eyeing you through hooded eyes.
“That’s not what I meant but suit yourself.” He said smugly before rolling his eyes and shifting his attention to the wardrobe on the far left off the room.
Fourteen minutes.
All you needed to do was endure fourteen minutes of this torture and you’d be able to go back to ignoring each other and pretending like your feelings for him were nonexistent.
So far only six Mississippi’s had gone by.
“How long do we have to be in here for again?” Wonwoo broke the silence again, the tension was thick and so far it seemed like you were the only suffocating in it.
“Um...only eight more minutes.” You brought your knees up to your chest and hugged them tightly. He was now looking at you and you couldn’t tell if it was indifference or disgust. After three years of knowing him...barely you couldn’t differentiate between the two and it always plagued with you a wave of anxiety. “I mean I’m not counting or anything it’s just...um yeah I think eight more minutes maybe seven now.”
If you could rip your tongue out of your mouth to keep yourself from embarrassing yourself any longer you would.
“Alright.” Wonwoo mumbled and sat up again resting his elbows on his knees in a poor attempt to close the semi large gap between the two of you. “Why have you kissed me yet?” He smirked before placing his chain against his thumb.
Your eyes grew wide and the air your lungs stopped at the base of your throat. He was only playing with you. That was all he was good for, but you couldn’t deny the soft palpitations of your against your rib cage, “I...um I thought that was your dare not mine?” You quirked your head to the side and tightened your arms around your legs. Your fingernails dug in your clothed shin and the panic started rushing through you when you noticed that he was now making his way towards you.
“You’re kind off making it hard for me when you’re all the way over here, so I’m giving you the reigns on this whole stupid game, but time is ticking and I’d rather get this over with sooner rather than later.” He finished and sat down in front of you, copying your position and resting his chin against his knees.
Sometimes you wondered why you harbored such stupid feelings for the boy in front of you, especially when he opened his mouth. Nothing good ever game out of it but then again he never stayed in your presence long enough for you to decide otherwise. He always left as soon as he saw you enter a room or approach the same table your mutual friends were sitting at. The few times he did stay and it was very few, everything he said got under your skin. More so if it was directed towards you.
“It’s a game right?” You questioned resting your back against the door. He was now too close to you and although he looked adorable you wanted to get away from him as soon as possible. Five minutes left. You breathed out, “And no one can see us, so we don’t have to kiss. They’re not going to ask because they’re too drunk and have probably forgotten by now.”
“Ashk, you’re no fun.” He blew out a raspberry, fogging up his round glasses and blowing his bangs away from his forehead briefly. “Just like you said...it is a game but I also don’t want to end my night without kissing someone.” He leaned back on his hands and extended his legs on either side of your body trapping you in. “Isn’t that what’s supposed to happen on parties and friend trips? There has to be at least two people hooking up.” He winked, tapping the toe of his sock covered foot against your side causing you to move away slightly.
“I’m sure you can find someone else to satisfy your needs then.” You shrugged and tore attention away from his soft deceiving brown eyes and focused them on the stupid brown wardrobe. It had become the star of the night.
“I want that person to be you though.” Wonwoo whispered his calloused fingers had found their way to your chin and turned your face carefully to look at him again. Your knuckles had gone white from how hard your grip was on your legs.
“W-Why? You don’t like me, hate me for some unknown reason so why show an interest now that you’re a few to many drinks in?”
Wonwoo laughed lowly, his thumb caressing your cheek and slowly traveling to your parted lips. You weren’t gonna lie if you had had a few more drinks in your system you would’ve given in to his touch and worshipped the ground he walked on. But you knew your limit and had stopped taking bitter tequila shots an hour ago.
“You’re wrong, unfortunately I don’t care enough to hate you. Frankly, I don’t see what my friends see in you but you’re cute...kinda enough to satisfy me for a night, atleast.” He tilted his head to the side and retreated his hand letting drop to his side.
He looked better when he kept his mouth shut, you concluded.
Thankfully you were nearing the one minute mark. Now after his confession and the utter jabs he had made towards your heart made you realize the thing you should’ve realized a long time ago. Jeon Wonwoo was an asshole hiding behind his god given looks and he didn’t deserve your attention or your heart.
“Find someone else then.” You pushed yourself off the floor using your entire strength. You could feel his glowing glare watching your every move as you opened the door to the room, kicking his foot in the process. Forty six minutes were left but you couldn’t stay in his presence any longer.
Six pairs of eyes were on you as soon as you came into view, obviously waiting to see what or hear of what had happened behind the closed door. Thankfully for you and unfortunately for them nothing had had happened and you had never before gotten the urge to kill someone as much as you wanted to murder the one and only Joshua Hong.
“You guys wasted your time.” You said before walking past them and down the hallway listening to their curiosity take over before the questions started up again. You didn’t care the only thing in your hazy state was the burning feeling of tequila as it traveled down your throat. Alcohol wasn’t the best way to deal with a heart break; it only led to a piercing hangover, but it would help in surviving the remainder of the night and keep you from crying. The last thing you wanted and needed was to cry, Wonwoo didn’t deserve your tears so you weren’t going to give him that feeling of instant gratification.
At least not now.
#seventeen fanfiction#seventeen x reader#seventeen imagines#seventeen scenarios#seventeen angst#svt fanfiction#svt x reader#svt imagines#svt scenarios#svt angst#wonwoo x reader#wonwoo imagines#wonwoo angst#wonwoo scenarios#wonwoo fanfic#seventeen wonwoo#svt wonwoo#seventeen drabbles#wonwoo drabbles
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“Gojo has a girlfriend!?” | Gojo x Reader Oneshot (Fluff)
Synopsis: Yuuji has just overheard a phone call with Gojo and this seemingly mysterious woman who's coming to visit. He brings the news to the other students, adamant that their teacher has a girlfriend much to the disbelief of Maki, especially when the possibility of the girlfriend being you arises.
Ao3 Link
WC: 2.6k TW: mentions of death/murder Just send an ask to be added to Gojo the taglist! (specify if you don’t want angst etc)
Jujutsu Kaisen Masterlist | Main Masterlist
“Guys, guys! Gojo has a girlfriend!” Yuuji announced, slamming the door open to the classroom.
“I refuse to believe that,” Nobara said rolling her eyes. “He couldn’t get a girlfriend even if he had the most romantic script in front of him.”
“I second that,” Maki said, not even looking up from her phone.
“Tuna, tuna,” Toge agreed.
“He’s not that bad-” Yuuji started.
“He’s an egotistical, immature man child who thinks dick jokes are the height of humour, what women would be attracted to that?” Maki glared.
“Then explain to me why I heard him call someone babe over the phone just now! And why I heard a girl’s laugh!”
“You say that like he doesn’t do that to everyone,” Nobara sighed.
“He said they were coming today anyway!” Yuuji insisted. “And he said “I love you” before he hung up!”
Now that raised eyebrows in the room.
“He… he really said that?” Maki said slowly for Yuuji just to nod enthusiastically in reply. “Then who the hell did he brainwash to be his girlfriend?!”
The group moved out of the classroom to outside as they argued leaving Megumi alone to slurp his noodles who was happy to be forgotten in the conversation since he already knew the answer. Watching the two adults yearn obviously after each other for years still scarred him, but he was happy you were coming today, even if you had the worst taste in men.
“Seriously who the hell is it!” Nobara yelled. “There’s no way its Utahime right?” The group was stood at the top of the stone stairs that led into the school, waiting for the mysterious visitor.
“She’d rather die,” Maki deadpanned.
“Mei Mei?”
“She’d go for someone richer.”
“Yuki?”
“She’s too busy for relationships, let alone with Gojo.”
“Shoko?”
“We would have noticed that by now.”
“A civilian?” Yuuji suggested.
“Like there’s any way he could explain the jujutsu world to a civilian without making it look like he was insane.”
Panda hummed from behind them. “(y/n)?”
Maki went still. “How dare you taint her name like that.”
Yuuji and Nobara looked to each other. “(y/n)?” they said in sync.
“She’s one of the only other special grade sorcerers,” Panda explained. “She was in Shoko and Gojo’s grade in school. She’s Gojo’s best friend.”
Yuuji and Nobara’s eyes widened.
“He has friends?” Nobara asked with a bit too much genuine shock.
“Somehow,” Maki spoke solemnly, pushing up her glasses. “But (y/n) is too cool to ever do that!” She looked to the sky with her outstretched hand dramatically. “I would never idolise and want to follow in the footsteps of someone if they were that foolish!”
“Bonito flakes!”
Nobara mouthed a ‘woah’ at Maki’s intensity, never seeing her look up to someone with so much passion.
A Megumi scratching his neck joined them from behind, now full enough of food to deal with what would soon happen.
“Who do you think it is?” Yuuji asked him.
Megumi sighed. “It’s-”
Panda whipped his head up, ears twitching, everyone falling silent. They strained their human ears and soon heard footsteps on the gravel coming towards them. Without warning a stick came hurtling at Maki’s head with deadly accuracy who froze before quickly cutting it in half, the pieces gliding past her head before the others could even blink.
“You’ve certainly improved Maki!” A happy voice spoke. Soon they saw a small woman with hands in pockets walking up the stone steps with a grin. “Yo yo yo,” you greeted.
“(y/n)!” Nobara and Yuuji gulped at Maki with, wondering how she would react to the attack. “How was my form? Was it alright?”
“Pretty good, pretty good,” you laughed, “I personally would have just side stepped to dodge it to retain some energy. But if you’re going to counter, I’d suggest putting your front leg a little more forward to help with your balance, but I’m sure you already knew that.” Offering Maki a knowing grin. “You reacted much faster than you did last time though that’s for sure. You’ll definitely have the Zenins kissing your ass in no time.”
Maki nodded sharply with the compliment and Nobara couldn’t help but notice the smile she was trying to keep down to remain in her collected self.
You looked over to Megumi who begrudgingly stepped forward to say hello, but the twitching corners of his mouth said otherwise. You gave him the ritual hair ruffle which he leant down into, knowing you had missed being able to reach down to tiny child Megumi to bother him whenever you wanted, but he still indulged in your methods of affection.
“You keep getting taller what a pain,” you whined.
“It is what happens when children reach puberty,” Megumi deadpanned.
“Beside the point,” you replied with the dismissive wave of a hand. “It’s of personal offense to me.”
You looked over to the other two first years blankly, taking them in, analysing their builds and posture. They gulped nervously under your critical stare. “Ah you two must be nail girl and Sakuna’s vessel, Nobara and Yuuji, right?” You smiled, disarming their defensive walls, nodding. “Nice to meet you! I’ll be coming up here a bit more to help teach now and then so I’ll get to know you two well soon.”
They beamed and you couldn’t help but feel your heart warm at the positivity that still remained in young sorcerers. Too many let their immaturity and childlike wonder, and frankly the happy and fun side of themselves, behind as soon as they realised how the world really was for shamans, you included, but the younger generation always gave you a kick in the gut to force you to remember. An unintended gesture that was greatly appreciated.
“But anyway,” you said, dropping you smile and sighing melodramatically. “Where’s the dipshit?”
“Who-?” Nobara and Yuuji started.
“Over by the track field,” Maki said, the other second years and Megumi pointing with her.
“Coolio,” you acknowledged and stuck your hands back in your pockets and started to walk towards the field before you heard Maki speak.
“Speaking of… Gojo,” she began, “Is it true he has a girlfriend?”
You would have laughed at the question had it not been so shocking to you that the answer wasn’t glaringly obvious. You glanced over to Megumi who had obviously not told them yet, who just looked at you with so much resentment for having indirectly causing what must have been a very long conversation before you arrived.
You looked back to Maki. “He does yeah… why do you ask?”
“Well, we’ve been wondering who it is, is she a sorcerer?”
You nodded.
“Someone we know?”
You nodded again, trying not to let the slowly rising smile read on your face.
“Well…” Maki huffed, “Who is it?”
You raised your fingers to your lips and feigned zipping them closed. “I’ve been sworn to upmost secrecy,” which was just entirely untrue but kept it much more fun.
“But you’re smart I’m sure you can figure it out.”
Maki nodded, absolutely defeated as you waved goodbye and headed to the track.
It didn’t take long to find him, his overwhelming aura hit you before his slender hands covered your eyes from behind. “Guess who!”
“I couldn’t even begin to guess, maybe my ex I still have feelings for, I would probably break up with my boyfriend for him, he’s very annoying.”
“You ass,” he replied taking his hands off which you just laughed at. “Your ex is a fucking asshole.”
“That fact is written across the universe in holy star dust.”
You finally took a good look at him, his stature towering over you as always, but always bringing the feeling of being safe like under a shelter in the rain instead of any kind of looming threat height can give you. You made eye contact through his black blindfold and couldn’t help but wish it was the old days where he wore his glasses so you could see his eyes more clearly, but then again, the old days didn’t only offer happy memories, it was why you were here in the first place.
The gang peered at you two from behind the bushes, watching every excruciating detail they could pick up from the interactions.
“Nothing too out of the normal yet,” Maki breathed, “That’s just ordinary friend things yeah? Yeah?” she questioned Nobara who nodded enthusiastically. Though the younger girl couldn’t help but notice the affection in your look at him, or the way her teacher’s body seemed to soften and let his usually unnoticeable guard down.
You sat down on the large concrete steps together, close enough to feel each other’s warmth. You two looked to the sky and watched as birds passed in a group of four, gliding through the air with no need to need flap their wings.
“How are you?” You asked.
“Straight to the point huh?”
You couldn’t help but smile a little but stayed silent for him to answer.
“I mean, it’s the same as every year isn’t it?”
“We both know that isn’t true.”
The events of last year still haunted you, and Satoru too, even though he was much better at hiding it. The two of you walking up to Suguru’s dying self, his hand clutched on his bleeding stomach as the two of you were just standing in shock, staring at the man that used to be your guys’ best friend. Satoru being the one to do the finishing blow because you were too much of a mess to do it. Gojo Satoru is good at hiding things, but those who knew him well enough knew sometimes the cracks were visible in his perfect façade.
He sighed. “You need to stop being right all the time, it gets frustrating.”
You chuckled and bumped your shoulder into his, internally grinning at his infinity being turned off for you even though it was nothing new. You took the opportunity to rest you head on his shoulder as the two of you looked up into the sky again in silence. Just taking in the slow heartbeat you could hear.
It was a few minutes before it was broken again.
“It feels weird to still feel like celebrating the birthday of a person I don’t know anymore, let alone of a person I killed,” he said honestly. “Like how is the engrained feeling of an arbitrary date that I properly celebrated only three times only mean more to me than it did back then when there’s no way to repeat the happiness of unaware teenagers.”
You hummed quietly, indulging him in his thoughts that you too felt. “I’m sorry I-”
“Don’t.”
“I’m sorry I made you do it,” I said, “He was your best friend.”
“And he was yours too, I wasn’t going to make you put a childhood friend down like a dog.”
You nodded into his shoulder, going quiet. He looked down at you and you couldn’t help yourself but reach up to touch his blindfold. He didn’t resist and sat quietly as you raised it so you could see his eyes. Little, almost microscopic droplets, detailed his under eyelashes. You gave him a small smile which he returned with his own as you brushed his eyes gently. He grabbed your hand delicately and kissed the fingers tips one at a time while you watched with total calm and comfort taking over your body, snuggling closer into the crook of his neck.
The group watched in tight tension as they spied on the scene before them. Maki looked like she was going to rip out the bush, roots and all, with the way she was gripping onto the small branches like a lifeline.
“It was probably just something very personal, and because they are good friends they feel comfortable doing that, yes that’s it. And the “I love you” over the phone must have been a joke or said in a platonic way. Yeah, that’s it.” Maki said, springing off all the close enough to realistic conspiracy theories in her head.
No one had the heart to tell her what was plainly obvious, nor the bones strong enough to deal with her disagreement.
You didn’t need to say it, he already knew, but you said it anyway. “I missed you,” you said quietly, “Going abroad sucks.”
“You really need to look at the sweet shops there and pick up some souvenirs.”
“Sweets don’t numb things for everyone,” you laughed, “Sometimes food can’t replace people.” You grabbed onto his hand and laced it in yours, his huge hand enveloping yours like a little protector.
“Did you get hurt?” he whispered; he knew you were fully capable to come from most missions entirely unscathed, but it didn’t stop the worry. People he cared about going to missions alone had left many scars in varying forms.
“I’m alright, just a few bruises here and there mainly by my own hand, no biggie.”
He nodded, happy with the answer.
He stroked his thumb over the back of your hand, leaning his head onto yours. “I love you,” he whispered, barely loud enough to hear over the subtle wind.
You squeezed his hand. You’d never been good at words, stumbling over what you’re really trying to say without saying it outright, even if you already knew what you were meant to say, especially when it came time for vulnerable things, but Satoru knew that better than anyone. So, you felt his face widen into a smile.
He squeezed your hand back.
He looked down at you again, taking his blindfold off so you could admire the now rarer sight of his eyes. There was no other way to describe his eyes than beautiful. Their blues captivated you like a ship barely staying afloat in a storming ocean, barely surviving, only at the sea’s mercy. Many were terrified of them, they were whispered about among shamans young and old, and to be fair they held power. Power unattainable except for those lucky few that inherited it. But to you it had always felt like it was the eyes that inherited Gojo Satoru. It was Gojo Satoru that really made them powerful along with infinity, no one had ever come close, and it was doubtful anyone ever will, even if he thought he was raising students that he wanted to be better than him. At the very least it was definitely a high bar to beat. But when it was you, and just him, just Satoru, together, it was not the power you yielded to. It was the fact that it was Satoru, the boy and now man you had fallen in love with and who had allowed himself to fall down to fall in love with you. When you looked into the sea of blue that seemed forever changing, the only word you could use to actually describe them was Satoru.
You rose your head to meet with his lips softly, giving him a sweet kiss that made his mouth upturn into a smile. And to be fair half of it was definitely because of the group of students that were losing their minds behind a bush right now, but the other half you happily knew was because of you.
Gojo Satoru may be an egotistical, immature man child who thinks dick jokes are the height of humour sometimes, okay maybe a bit more than sometimes. But he was Gojo Satoru, the most imperfect perfect person you’d ever met, and you would stay by his side until you parted from the world, but you were sure it wouldn’t take long to find him in the next.
.
.
.
Jujutsu Kaisen Masterlist | Main Masterlist
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#gojo x reader#gojo saturo x reader#gojo x you#gojo saturo#jjk#jjk gojo#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen satoru#satoru gojo#satoru gojo x reader#megumi is tired#maki is losing her mind#gojo x female reader#maki#maki zenin#itadori yuuji#megumi#megumi fushiguro#nobara#nobara kugisaki#panda jjk#toge
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One More Chance - Part Three
Clay Spenser x Reader
Part One // Part Two
Join The Group Chat Here - If You Want Tagging Manually Let Me Know 🖤
Clay Spenser Masterlist
This Months Writing
Life had changed over the last year, after six months of debating whether you could be around Clay again you bit the bullet and moved back home, you missed your brother and the rest of your family so you moved in with Jase whilst you found yourself another job and got on your feet.
The night you turned up at the bulkhead with your suitcase in tow you got tackled to the ground when everyone realised you were coming home, and just as expected the night ended up with you finishing a bottle of whiskey on your own, and because you ended up so drunk you may have kissed Clay when you went outside for a smoke. That was the kiss that set things in motion and for the last six months you had been sneaking around, not letting anyone know you were seeing him again.
Laying in bed with your head on Clay’s chest, you ram your fingers down his chest, getting lost in the sound of his heart beat.
“I should really be heading back” you whispered looking up at Clay, “As much as I don’t want to, it’s getting late and I know soon Jase will put a ping out on my phone”
“I just wished we didn’t have to sneak around” he whispered “But I understand why, Jase isn’t going to be happy to know we are back together after last time”
“Hey” you said propping yourself up on your elbow. “That’s in the past now baby, we were both young and maybe a bit stupid, we are completely different people to who we were but we talked things through and we are good now, so no more bringing up the past”
“Jase isn’t going to see it that way though” he said softly.
“You leave Jase to me” you laughed, placing a soft kiss on his shoulder “Now I have ten minutes before I need to leave and I don’t know when I will be able to come over again this week so I need more cuddles”
Nothing could wipe the smile off your face as you closed the door as quietly as you could, the last thing you needed was to disturb your brother. But the moment you locked the door, placing your keys on the side and locked your trainers off the living room light turned on making you jump.
“Fuck you gotta stop doing that” you breathed placing your heart over your chest as you spun around to see Jase sitting on the sofa with his arms folded over his chest.
“Where have you been?” He asked standing up.
“Jheeze you sound like dad” you laughed leaning against the door frame “and just out with a friend”
“That’s the third time this week you have come in late” Jase stated.
“Can’t I have friends now big bro” you smirked.
“There’s a guy, isn't there?”
“Definitely sound like dad now Jase” you laughed “And even if there was I wouldn’t be telling you now would I? Now can I go to bed now or you got some more questions you wanna ask me?”
“Just looking out for you sis” Jason said pulling you into a hug. “That’s all”
“I’m a big girl now Jase” you laughed “I will see you in the morning”
Before he could say anything else you ran up to your room, shit was starting to get harder to hide, you didn’t know how everyone would react to finding out you and Clay got back together, especially Jase and Ray, they knew the heartache you went through but this time was different. You both sat down like adults, talked things through and got everything out in the open.
You couldn’t lie, you were the happiest you had been in years, no matter who you dated after Clay you always found yourself comparing them to him no matter how hard you tried not to. Climbing into bed you left Clay’s hoodie on, thank god Jase didn’t click onto who the hoodie belonged to. Letting the smell of his aftershave be what you needed to fall asleep.
The sound of the guys laughing woke you up, it was too damn early for them to be this loud. Rolling out of bed you quickly pulled the hoodie off getting changed into a long sleeve shirt and a pair of pyjama shorts before you headed downstairs.
“Morning assholes” you grumbled as you headed straight for the coffee machine. “It is far too early for you to be this loud”
“Maybe if you didn’t get back home at god knows what time after sneaking around with this friend then you wouldn’t be so tired” Jase smirked.
“Like I said last night you aren’t my dad” you said pulling your phone out to see a text off Clay making you smile at your phone as you quickly texted back.
“Oh there’s definitely a guy” Jase stated “You never smile at your phone”
“Oh shit” Ray laughed “Come on then Baby Hayes, who is the unlucky lad”
“Can’t a girl have a private life?” You sighed running your hand through your hair.
“Nope” Sonny smirked. “So come on it all makes sense now, you are more smiley recently, always texting and always bailing on us”
“Yeah come on Y/N tell us” Clay smirked, leaning his head on his fists. “We are all dying to know”
“Do you know what I’m going back to bed” you laughed grabbing your coffee, “I don’t need interrogating first thing in the morning”
Once you had left the kitchen Sonny turned to Clay.“Right whilst we are on the subject of people being more smiley, what’s new with you brother” Sonny smirked.
“Can’t I just be happy?” Clay asked, feeling all eyes on him. Feeling his phone buzz in his pocket, pulling his phone out he saw a text from you making him automatically smile.
“See there it is again, that smile” Sonny said slamming his hand on the counter.
“And with that I’m out” Clay laughed slipping his phone in his pocket to head out to meet you at the small little coffee shop you had found.
After about 15 minutes you came running down the stairs, running into the kitchen grabbing your car keys off the counter.
“Thought you were going back to bed?” Jase asked, raising his brow with you being fully dressed.
“Change of plans” you laughed “I’m going out and no I don’t know when I will be back” Making your way around the guys giving them a hug “Where did Clay go?” You asked, keeping up appearances.
“Dunno, he got a text and then dipped” Jase shrugged.
“His loss he missed out on my awesome hugs” you laughed “Right losers I will catch you later.”
The moment the door slammed close, Jase ran his hand over his face. Things just completely clicked into place, and everything made sense.
“Wait you don’t think?” Ray asked.
“That they are back together?” Jase sighed “Everything makes sense now, the nights that Y/N gets home late are the same nights Clay bails on us, and even when they are in the same room they are both always on their phones texting”
“Did anyone notice that she was wearing Clay’s hoodie?” Sonny asked.
“I’m going to fucking kill her and him” Jase snapped. “Didn’t she learn from the heartache?”
“What’s the plan?” Ray asked.
“I’m going to get the truth out of her” Jase nodded “And it’s happening tomorrow, I want to make sure that I’m not putting two and two together and getting five, then I am going to have a little talk with Clay”
@chibsytelford @mrsmarvelous1995 @supervalcsi @talicat713 @disasterfandoms @bravo-four-seal-team @jasonbabymama @jayhalsteadfan-2417 @lotsoflovefromlea @seik-o @ohitsnicolexo @velvetcardiganbucky @phoenixhalliwell @pancakeisreading @itsonautopilot @pinkrockstar19
#Clay Spenser#clay spenser x reader#clay spenser imagine#clay spenser oneshot#seal team#seal team x reader#seal team imagine#seal team oneshot
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Healing Hands: Chapter 3
Happy finals week, ugh. As always, reblogs are appreciated!!
Jasonette Sword Art Online AU
Read here on AO3
Tag list: @iloontjeboontje
First | Previous | Next
Chapter 3: Well shit Babs, maybe I like ponies
Marinette sat on a rock and paddled her bare feet in the water. It was a beautiful day, the sun was warming the top of her loose, dark hair and the ocean in front of her stretched for miles and miles.
A noise disturbed her peaceful moment. A distant cry, probably a seagull.
She sighed and leaned back on her hands to breathe in the smell of--
Marinette choked. Why was there smoke in the air?
The cries grew louder as she looked back at the water before her. She started when she saw that they came from her friends, who were in the now-tumultuous water, trying to keep themselves afloat. They were only a few yards away, she could make it if she just--
A force around her waist tugged her hard as she leapt to her feet. Her face collided with the concrete beneath her-- the top of a building, she realized. If the water level was up this high, then....
From where she lay, she could see directly down into the water. It was no longer clear, but a deep crimson. There were dozens of figures scattered about, some still struggling and some motionless. She scrambled to get up as her eyes snapped to Alya’s hand disappearing below the waves.
That damn force jerked her to the other side of the building, farther from her friends.
“No!” Marinette cried out desperately. The force released her and she whirled to find her attacker.
A flash of red caught her eye, and--
Oh.
It was Ladybug.
Marinette shook her head, not understanding. If that was Ladybug, then.... No, it couldn’t be Ladybug, because she was Ladybug. She fumbled for her earrings, but felt nothing.
Ladybug stalked deliberately up to Marinette and pushed her to the ground. Marinette landed on her hands and knees, both of which were now shaking.
“Look at them,” it was her own voice that spat so harshly from Ladybug’s lips. “Look at them.” She grabbed Marinette’s hair from behind and forced her head up.
Marinette could now see Adrien, Kagami, Luka, and Chloe in the ocean in front of her. Their lifeless faces floated just below the surface, the bloodied water doing nothing to conceal their frozen expressions of terror.
Marinette sobbed and closed her eyes. Ladybug pulled sharply on her hair again, and looked into Marinette’s eyes.
“Look at them. Don’t you dare take your eyes off the mess you’ve made. You will never be able to save them all,” Ladybug’s eyes, her eyes, blazed with the vehemence of her words. She opened her mouth to speak again, but a loud beeping sound was all that came out.
Marinette gasped and sat up in her bed, the alarm sending her heartbeat into a frenzy. Tikki flew up next to her as she slumped over with a hand over her eyes.
It was just a dream.
Another Kwami must have turned off her alarm because the beeping had stopped, but Marinette could still hear the echoes of her friends’ dying breaths ringing in her ears.
“Marinette... are you okay?” Tikki placed a delicate paw on her chosen’s arm. “We heard you cry out while you were sleeping.”
The girl lifted her head and gave the little god a shaky smile. “It was just a dream.”
“Do you want to talk about it?” Tikki floated back down to where the other Kwami were piled on the side of the bed with similarly worried expressions on their faces.
Marinette exhaled a bracing sigh. “Okay.... It was Syren. Or-or Chat Blanc, I’m not really sure.” The Kwami exchanged a look at that. This was not the first time she’d had a nightmare about water. “But Ladybug was there, and she was attacking me.”
Tikki looked especially concerned about that new piece of information. She opened her mouth to say something when Marinette’s phone lit up with a call. The ringtone was Alya’s.
Marinette picked up, trying to control the shaking of her hands. “H-hey girl, what’s up?” Her tone was deceptively cheerful.
“Hey Mari! Just checking to see if you’re awake. Nino and I are ready, he even put on the goggles already!” Marinette instantly relaxed as she heard Alya’s excited voice bubbling out.
“Yeah dudette, they feel really weird. But comfy!” Nino must have leaned over to pitch in.
Marinette shook off the last vestiges of the nightmare with a giggle. “Yeah, it’s kind of tricky to get the headset to fit over your glasses, but you’ll get used to it!”
“Well if you’re not ready yet then you’d better hurry up, girl! The game launches in five minutes.”
Marinette scrambled to check the time. “Oh crap! I gotta go, see you guys soon!” She hung up and rushed to untangle herself from her blankets.
“Good thing you set three alarms, huh?” Tikki followed her down from the loft and watched her brush out her hair.
Marinette stuck her tongue out at the god of creation.
* * *
Red Hood stalked into the Batcave, nearly running Oracle over as she wheeled herself up to her station at the Batcomputer.
“Woah Jaybird, don’t let me get in your way there,” Babs glared at his retreating back. “Asshole,” she muttered to herself.
Jason hurled his helmet onto the floor of the bathroom and began shucking off his suit with far more force than necessary. He started a shower and looked over his new wounds in the mirror. He’d been stupid, so damn stupid, on patrol.
“Red Hood, report in,” Batman’s gravelly voice cut through on his comms. “Hood, you are not to engage alone. What is your location?”
But Jason couldn’t hear him. The only thing he could hear was blood rushing in his ears, but it wasn’t his blood. No, it was the blood of every monstrous, corrupt asshole in this city. And he wanted it to run on the streets.
The Joker had sent thugs out to a meet-up. Well, Red Hood could send them back in a casket. He crouched beside a gargoyle and watched for the arrival of the van he’d tailed. There were only two men. They left the vehicle and waited outside, lighting cigarettes. Too easy.
Red Hood swept down the building, guns never leaving their holsters. He wanted this to hurt. Them or him, he wasn’t sure. But he got his wish as he beat the two men to a pulp. He wasn’t sure how far he’d have gone if not for the arrival of the gang the Joker’s men were supposed to meet with.
They slashed his back with knives. Shallow wounds, easy to manage. By the time Red Hood turned to face them, the others had arrived-- Batman, Nightwing, Robin. And boy were they pissed.
Jason winced as the hot water hit the cuts on his back. He rolled his shoulders and just let the steam ground him. He didn’t kill again, even if every time that green-haired bastard got involved, he went off the rails.
He would get to choose his own path, not the one Bruce wanted for him, but damn well not the one Thalia wanted for him either. This story was his, he reminded himself while gingerly toweling off. Even if he couldn’t look his own reflection in the eye.
He gripped the countertop, staring down as he let his hair drip into the sink. No, he wasn’t feeling desperate enough to see if his eyes were green again.
Damnit, he had to apologize to Babs. He felt calmer now, but he’d been a real dick when he came in. Jason dressed quickly in sweatpants and an old shirt, then padded quietly back to where he knew his sister would be at the computers.
“Hey,” he said, knocking softly when he entered to announce his presence. Barbara didn’t respond for a moment. She was leaning forward in her chair, typing something into one monitor while listening to police chatter, then nodded to herself and sat back.
“Hey.” She raised an eyebrow at him. “Robin told me what happened on patrol.”
Jason scowled. “That little tattletale.”
Barbara offered him a reassuring smile. “That little tattletale is the only reason I didn’t hack into your bank account and order a damn pony.”
“Well shit Babs, maybe I like ponies,” Jason snarked back, but his heart wasn’t into it. “Listen... I’m sorry about earlier. If replacement talked to you already, you know what kind of mood I was in, but that’s no excuse.”
Babs turned her chair to face him and held out her hand. He stepped forward and took it, and she said, “We know you’re trying, Jay. Stuff like this? This is who you are. A year ago, you wouldn’t have been caught dead apologizing to me!” She cringed. “Ah, no offense.”
He chuckled. “None taken, it’s about time you started getting in on the undead jokes.” He patted her hand before walking away back to the main space of the cave. “But thank you, it means a lot.”
“Took the words right out of my mouth!” She raised her voice and turned back to face the computer.
Dick and Tim were already waiting in the cave. Tim was fiddling with some beds and what looked like opaque ski goggles. He always fidgeted when he was nervous.
“Hey replacement,” Jason shouted across the room. He noticed Dick bristle, but cut him off before he could get the patented older brother speech. “How much time ‘til the launch?”
Tim’s eyes lit up, and damn him for caring, but Jason just didn’t want them to be afraid of him.
* * *
Connor and Zatanna were washing dishes in the Cave’s kitchen after dinner. Connor heard the distant sound of someone arriving via zeta tube. He let Zatanna know as they finished drying their plates, then followed her to go greet their visitors.
Wally and Artemis staggered into the room, both weighed down by overflowing boxes of equipment.
“Oh thank god, please help me!” Artemis said, spotting Connor. He obliged and easily took the heavy box from her. She rubbed her arms and smiled gratefully as he held it aloft in one hand.
“It must be so handy having him around,” she sighed to Zatanna.
The magician giggled. “It certainly has its perks, but....” She lifted her hands and said clearly, “Flesruoy egnarra.” The contents of the boxes, some assorted cots, VR headsets, and computers, floated up and placed themselves into a neat formation. “A girl can get by by herself.” She gave Artemis a fistbump.
The zeta tube activated and they all looked up to watch it. The AI announced Wondergirl, and Cassie Sandsmark walked out. She looked up from her phone and waved. “Oh hey guys, whatcha doing?”
Wally zoomed around the set-up Zatanna had created. “We’re just setting up to play this new virtual reality game that’s coming out at midnight! What about you?”
“Oh, what a coincidence, I was just--”
Cassie was cut off by the zeta tube activating again. This time it was Bart, carrying Jaime bridal style, and running at full speed. He skidded to a halt, put a very ill-looking Jaime down, and ran a hand through his windswept hair.
“So totally crash! What’s poppin’?” He made finger guns at Connor, Zatanna, and Artemis.
Zatanna started explaining, “Well, like were just telling Cassie, there’s this new video game coming out at midnight and we--”
She was interrupted by the screech of a green pterodactyl swooping in from the zeta tube. It circled once around the high ceilings of the hollowed-out mountain, then landed and shrank into Beast Boy.
“Just a heads up, Arsenal’s right behind me and he’s a little angry-- oh what are you guys doing?”
Connor was getting frustrated now. “We’re trying to get set up for this new video game that’s launching in five minutes, so if you guys wouldn’t mind--”
A small explosion sounded from the door to the exterior of the island. Roy burst in amidst a cloud of dust.
“Hope I’m not late, I lost my phone.” He sounded like he was in a bad mood.
Bart whispered to Connor, “He means he destroyed his phone.”
Roy dusted off his pants, then looked to Wally and Artemis and asked, “The hell are you doing here?”
“AUGH,” Artemis had had enough. “We’re here to play the video game coming out at midnight! If you want to join us, fine, but if you don’t then get out.” She pointed to the zeta tubes.
Garfield tried to placate her. “Sheesh, it’s just a game! No need to get so worked up.”
Jaime gave him an incredulous look. “Weren’t you just throwing a tantrum yesterday about Bart kicking your ass halfway to Bialya in Smash?”
“...Noted.” Garfield answered.
“Well, looks like we’ve got plenty of hands to help get everyone set up. Let’s get to it!” Cassie expertly maneuvered the two teams away from setting off their more explosive members. They distributed headsets and assigned reclining positions without further delay.
* * *
Marinette put the headset on and laid down on her bed.
“Ready to go back?” Tikki asked her.
She gave the little god a grin. “Definitely.”
In the distance, the bells in Notre Dame chimed six times, but Marinette couldn’t hear them. Her mind had gone somewhere far, far away. Somewhere new.
#healing hands#jasonette#sword art online au#virtual reality#maribat#maribat fic#batfam#batfam fic#yj#yj fic#young justice#young justice fic
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Live for me (Spencer Reid x Reader) 💔
Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader
Summary: While working on a case, Spencer and y/n get kidnapped by the unsub. For everything to end: one has to die.
Warnings: ⚠️ THIS STORY DOES NOT HAVE A GOOD ENDING AT ALL, DON'T READ IF YOU CAN'T HANDLE THIS KIND OF TOPIC; DON'T FORGET TO GET SUPPORT AFTER READING ⚠️; death of major characters, loss of a person, grief, medication use, overdose, suicide, cursing, angst, depression, sad stuff……...
A/N: I cried as much as you are right now. I wrote a bit of it around 1am. Had to watch the unauthorized documentary of Matthew to cheer me up, and you should totally do it. Either that, or criminal minds bloopers, fun cm videos like "bau being kids", etc
Word count: 2.1k
"Hey. You're finally awake."
As you woke up, you only felt cold. You could tell by the ambiance that you weren't inside a room, but outside.
You could hear the faint sounds of cars, guessing that you could be at a high level.
"Come on, we have a game to start. You don't want to make us wait, do you?"
Us?
You looked around, realizing what he meant by 'us'.
It was him...and Spencer.
His eyes were wide open, locked in yours.
"Why are you doing that?"
"Because it's fun. Don't you like to have fun? Everyone does! That's why I gathered two lovebirds here. It'll double the fun! I'm smart, I know."
"You're nothing but an asshole. You're stupid as hell!" You yelled.
"No. I'm not."
"Your face tells me the fucking contrary!"
"Shut up. SHUT UP. YOU'RE MAKING ME WASTE TIME."
"I DON'T FUCKING CARE." You barely had time to place another word that he had punched you in the face, blood dripping out of your nose.
"Stop! Don't touch her!" Spencer yelled.
"She deserved it. She was being an annoying bitch. And I hate people like her."
"I...I'm not done." You muttered.
"Huh? What did you say?"
"I said I'm not done!"
"Done with what ? Me? Oh yeah, you're not. But soon, you'll be."
"Not until you're dead." You said.
"Unfortunately, I won't be the one who will die tonight. It'll be...one of you. One will live, one will die. Only one winner will come out of here alive, not two."
"We'll see that."
"No we won't. Not if you're dead."
"Dare touching her." Spencer said.
"Aw, your husband is so loyal. I'm gonna cry."
"You're gonna cry even more when you'll get to spend the rest of your life in prison; if someone doesn't kill you before."
"I am unstoppable honey. I'm as fast as the speed of the light. Here's the proof, I have been killing for ten years, no one found me. The only thing police had done was to send people that knew of the murders, had witnessed them, but didn't commit it. They all were sort of proud, not knowing that the real killer was still on the loose."
"The team will come. You're trapped. This is where everything ends for you."
"Nuh-uh. For you, not for me. I'm a free man, you're a soon to be dead girl, and you, a soon to be dead man."
"What a fool you're making out of yourself. You're a fucking coward, you're stupid as hell, worthless, you're so full of shit! Just shut the hell—" You spat out, as he raised his gun to your head.
"Now what, huh?"
"Now what? You want me to repeat myself?"
"Dare to do it."
"You're weak."
"Don't get me started."
"Just fucking surrender at this point, your pathetic life is ruined, you have nothing—" You couldn't even finish your sentence. You never got to.
He had shot you in front of the terrified eyes of Spencer.
You were now laying on the floor, a pool of blood growing bigger next to your head. A stray tear had fallen from your eye, the last tear you had shed.
Spencer's screams echoed, as a loud sound came from the door that had soon been opened.
The whole team was shocked at the sight of the scene. You, on the floor, possibly dead, and Spencer's eyes on you.
The guy had attempted to point his gun at Spencer to kill him as well, but then three shots were heard. Next thing everyone saw, he fell on the floor.
The last memories were a blur. Spencer only remembered the sobs of the team, arms wrapping around him, nothingness, he suddenly felt empty.
You were gone.
No.
That wasn't real.
It couldn't.
You couldn't be dead.
It wasn't possible.
It…wasn't.
--------
A week has passed since your death. He had stayed in his apartment, wrapped in a blanket. Only breathing. He wasn't doing anything and hasn't been going out since your funeral.
Part of him didn't want to come. He didn't want that to happen. But at the same time, he would have regretted it forever if he hadn't come.
He had found himself in your room, at 7AM, looking at the stuff in the drawers, until a pack of envelopes caught his attention.
He took it in his hands, before a sob escaped his lips. He had immediately recognised your handwriting.
The first letter was addressed to him.
'Spence' was written on the back.
He opened it with shaky hands, reading the two first words.
Dear Spencer,
I know it's morbid to write this kind of letter, because I'm not dying soon, or dead; but, I wanted to write this for you and the other members, in case something happens to me.
I wouldn't want to leave everyone behind without them knowing how much I loved them, you would have the right to know.
The letter for the other members of the team are also in the drawer you found yours, so please don't forget to give the letter.
If you are reading this, something happened, it means that I'm not alive anymore.
This letter is for you, the love of my life, my best friend, my colleague, my husband, first of all, I love you, I always have, and will always love you.
I want to thank you for being part of my life.
You saved my life.
A week before I met you, I planned to commit suicide. I had no family, no friends, no one to count on anymore.
Everyone had left me behind.
I don't have an eidetic memory, so I don't remember the exact hour, only the day, but I'm sure you do remember.
It was on a Sunday, 14….or 15th of June. The day I met you, was the day I planned to die. I was at the coffee shop, probably drinking the last coffee of my life.
I wasn't dressed at all in a pretty way. I think I had a hoodie and old jeans. I had picked up my order and decided to sit at a table to try to enjoy the view as I wouldn't see it anymore.
I didn't put sugar at all in my coffee. I hated black coffee, but I didn't care anymore. Even if the coffee would spill on my clothes, I wouldn't care.
Nothing mattered anymore.
And, that's when you saved my life.
The fact that the sugar was still next to the cup, unopened, apparently caught your attention.
I wish I was dressed better. I looked pathetic and horrible.
But you only saw what I didn't see anymore in me. You thought I was pretty, amazing.
I don't know how and why, we began talking, which ended with me, writing my number on your arm before leaving the shop.
That's when I decided I didn't want to die anymore, I wanted to live for you. Only you.
I can't thank you enough. You saved me. I could have died that day, and we would have never met. I would have never dated you, married you, and lived happily with you.
You made all of this possible.
Spencer, don't change. Stay the person you are. Not only you are the sun of my life, but you're the sun of everyone in the team.
Thank you for being with me.
And please, if anything happens, if I'm gone; live for me.
I love you.
Your wife, y/n.
He couldn't see you anymore.
By the time Spencer had finished reading your letter, tears were falling down his cheeks; he still couldn't believe the fact that you were gone.
He couldn't kiss you anymore.
He couldn't touch you anymore.
What would he wake up to each day? Only to an empty bed.
The only memory of you he'll have will be the pictures and the smell on your clothes. But eventually, the smell would go away, and the pictures would only remain frozen memories forever.
He would have to live without you, breathe without you, only prepare one cup of coffee instead of two, cook for only one person, leave the house without having someone to say goodbye to, come back without having someone to say hello to; his entire life was ruined.
You were his entire life, the reason he was living, breathing.
And now that you weren't here anymore, what was he supposed to do?
His life was senseless, useless without you. He couldn't live, enjoy life, while you were six feet under ground,
Dead.
It wasn't fair.
None of it was fair.
He should have died that night.
It shouldn't have been you.
He collapsed into the bed, laying down on your pillow. It still smelled like you, he had desperately tried to pretend like you were still here, but you weren't, he couldn't hear your soft breathing, feel the air on his skin, your skin in contact with his, you weren't here, you wouldn't come back.
He had wished for it to be a bad dream, he had wished for it to only be a dream, and that you would be by his side again.
But it never happened.
He had to face the reality.
You were gone forever.
He had cried himself to sleep, holding your letter and one of your coats in his hands.
Tomorrow, he'd wake up to an empty bed.
Alone.
You would not be in the bed.
He would only wake up to the sound of the stupid alarm, not your voice.
He wouldn't feel your hands on his face, in his hair, on his body.
*
He hadn't slept at all.
He couldn't.
You were the only solution for him to sleep. No matter what was on his mind, no matter how stressed he was, when he'd feel you by his side, he would immediately calm down.
But now, he had nothing.
The apartment was empty.
Calm.
Soundless.
Lifeless.
For him, it wasn't his home anymore, only walls and flooring.
He'd have to live there, every single item in the house reminding him of you. Every moment, every look, every breath, would remind him of you.
Everyone had tried to talk to him, and sat with him for hours. But he had only stared at the wall, with an empty look.
Technically, he was still alive, still breathing, but he was dead inside. No one recognized him anymore.
It had been a month since your death, it felt like five to him.
Every single second, minute, hour, day without you was unbearable.
If he had to live it was with you, and only you.
If you weren't there, he couldn't live.
He had no reason to.
The cold floor he was laying on had just reminded him that he was still alive.
He felt so tired.
He didn't have the strength anymore.
He didn't want to fight anymore.
Not in a world where you didn't exist.
Not without you by his side.
Life had no meaning anymore.
The colors had been drained from the world from the moment life had left your body.
He hadn't felt this kind of peace for months.
He closed his eyes, and a few minutes later,
He saw you.
You had a yellow dress on, his favorite. He called your name, and saw your beautiful eyes once again.
A sad smile was on your face, as he saw you walking towards him.
"Spencer, why are you doing here?"
"I'm sorry y/n. I'm so sorry. I tried. I couldn't live without you, it was impossible."
"Shh, shh...it's okay. You tried babe, you tried. Now you're here. That's all that matters."
"But y/n, I broke the promise. I couldn't live for you, I didn't do it."
"Spencer, it's okay. Everything will go away, everything; because I'm here now, we're together. We're not away from each other anymore. I promise everything is going to be okay."
"...promise?"
"Promise." You took his hand, smiling at him.
You turned out to be right, everything went away.
He could finally allow himself to be relieved.
Now, he could be by your side forever.
--
Dear y/n,
So sorry.
I wrote this letter after you died. I had to tell you everything.
I'm sorry.
I can't do it anymore, I love you too much to the point I can't live without you anymore.
I want you to know that I'm grateful for all of the moments we've spent together.
Thank you for being my girlfriend.
Thank you for marrying me.
I'm sorry we didn't live long enough to have children. I wish we could have.
I know we would have named them after the team. Garcia would have been their godmother.
You wanted to have two, I wanted three, or five, like Matt.
I wanted to have mini versions of us running in the house. But it never happened, I'm sorry.
Thank you for all of these years you've spent with me.
I have never hated to be with you one single day. I always appreciated every day by your side.
You are so beautiful, don't forget that.
I could never thank you enough.
Spence.
I love you y/n.
--------
Left letters;
To the BAU, my family;
When I wrote this, I was still alive; but if you're reading it now, I'm not alive anymore. Something might have happened.
I want everyone to know what was on my mind.
Thank you for being an amazing team.
Derek, you were the brother I never had. You always stood by my side, and you can't imagine how grateful I am. I wish you the best, Savannah and Hank are lucky to have you by their side.
Hotch, you were like 'a step father', you protected me, listened to me, I could talk freely with you. Jack is an awesome little guy, I liked babysitting him.
Rossi, you also were like a father to me. You taught me how to cook, how to be better person, I owe you everything. I also want to thank you for marrying us at our wedding.
Emily, you are everything; a mother, sister, friend, I still remember all of the nights we've spent at the bar, on the couch eating ice cream, exchanging secrets, like little girls. I always had admired you.
Matthew, Luke, you guys have also the same role to me, you were the brothers I wished for, teasing me, pulling pranks on me, cheering me up, taking care of me, worrying just when I fell off my chair or when I had a paper cut.
JJ, you are amazing. You have made two wonderful children I loved to be around, they look exactly like you (No offense Will). You also were like Emily, my whole family.
It's the same for Tara, you had always listened to me. You are a strong and amazing woman.
I'm sorry if I repeated myself, but that is mostly because you guys are all my family, I feel the exact same way about everyone.
I am sorry for everything.
Garcia;
I'm sorry I couldn't live long enough to have children. You would have been their godmother, all of them.
You would have babysat them, even when I would have been free, you would have loved them so much.
You truly are the sun.
Thank you, everyone, for being yourself. You have brought me so much joy.
Whatever happens, don't change guys. Keep enlightening other people's lives like you always did.
I love you guys.
To the team;
y/n.
--
I'm sorry. Every time you guys were there, you had tried your best to cheer me up; and you did, but the pain had covered everything. The pain was stronger.
The pain won over everything.
I fought.
I tried.
But y/n was my whole life, and without her, I was nothing.
I missed her, so much. So much.
I'm so sorry.
Thank you for being a wonderful team.
Spencer.
#criminal minds#aaron hotchner#cm#criminal minds fic#derek morgan#spencer reid#spencer reid fic#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x y/n#matthew gray gubler fic#matthew gray gubler
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give us a random headcanon go 👀
UHM OK
So
This got long and kind of angsty I’m SORRY-
Axel and Mark are brothers. Axel’s older than mark by a fairly big margin so he offers that good ol’ elder brother wisdom™️ and Mark isn’t always here for it.
Axel’s had to drag mark out of parties more times than he can count, some because he was worried about his lil bro, some because he wasn’t answering moms texts and axel wasn’t about to let him make their momma feel bad.
Like this one time, their mom was punishing Mark for being completely shitfaced and missing something for their grampa, and Mark straight up snuck out of his room, no note, no regards, nothing, and with his mom fearing the absolute worst, that she’d lost her son, her baby, Axel quickly tracked down his brother and hauled his drunk ass right back home, speeding so fast mark was puking in the truck, yelling at him so bad mark pouted, and by the time they got home his brother was just a needy, scolded mess, and their mom was all over him, taking care of him and letting him puke and whine about his tummyache, and if she needed Axel to get anything, he did, not questions asked.
When mark was going through his first serious breakup, Axel really stepped forwards to work him back to normal, doing things with him other than just drinking the problems away like his friends wanted to. They went to cheap bowling alleys and drank cheap beer, they would drive around at 2 am, blasting music as they passed a joint, and it was probably the first real time- like honest, true, raw- that Mark learned it was okay to be a man and cry. He was hitting Axel, screaming and telling him she was every terrible name under the sun and that Axel had no idea what the fuck Mark went through to try to keep her happy.
When Axel pulled over, he shoved Mark back a little, just enough to straighten him back, telling him to stop being a pussy and just embrace it. She was gone. She was no good for him, and she was gone. She broke his heart, it was okay to be sad, and Mark wore his vocal chords raw with his sobs and shrieks of despair. “Why doesn’t she fucking want me, Axe? What’s wrong with me?”
“Nothing, dude,” he promises over his brothers tears. “You’re at a stupid age where love doesnt mean shit to nobody. Fuck, I am too. But right now, you’re sad because you’re alone, and one day you’re going to find someone, and they’re going to make you fear a lot of things more important than just ‘being alone.’ Trust me dude. You’re too fucking young to get that.”
They don’t talk about that night often. Axel’s jacket collar had been permanently ruined from Mark’s tears and hot breath against the leather, but from then on, instead of just getting drunk off his rocker when he was sad, he’d just find Axel and cry it out.
Their dad passed away when Mark was young, and their mom never really recovered from it. Because of this, Axel really took the role of being momma’s fix-it man, getting an under-the-table job when he was young and making sure Mark had snacks and lunches while their mom took care of the house. When momma Cluney eventually remarried, she never ceased to thank Axel for all he did, and it always put Mark in a weird feeling. Not that he wasn’t grateful beyond words, he just always felt bad that Axel had to go through that at such a young age.
“You were in Kindergarten,” Axel says cooly, passing his brother a beer. “What were you going to do, sell dunk-a-roos for cold, hard cash?”
“I could’ve done more,” he mumbles, taking a long sip of his drink. “Like... I could’ve been more grateful for the toys and the lunch money.”
Axel chuckles and reaches over to ruffle Mark’s hair, “hey; you were fed. You didn’t give mom too much shit. And on your birthday, you got the Power-Ranger toys you wanted. You were grateful. You just didn’t get why you had to wait until your birthday.”
Mark snorts and shoves Axel’s hand away, sighing softly, “I wish I knew him, dude..”
“You look just like him.”
“What was he like?”
Axel hums and leans back in his seat, fingers swirling the lip of his beer bottle, “I remember when I was nine, I told him I was going to run away. Go live in the treehouse of our old house.” He paused to smirk, “bastard made me a lunch box with two peanut butter sandwiches, a bag of barbecue chips and a juice box and said ‘good for you! You’re a man now, do what you gotta do!’ I never made it off of the porch.”
Mark snickers and they get real quiet. “I miss him,” he admits. “I don’t remember him... but I miss him.”
Axel hums again, “he was moms great love. Never laid a hand on us, nor her. He was a good man.”
Mark raises his bottle to his brother, “you’re a good man too, dude.”
“Believe me, mark,” Axel chuckles sadly. “I’m only a quarter of the man he was.”
On a lighter note, Axel taught Mark to drive. He filled his truck with gas, drove them both out to the city limits, butt-fuck no where, with a bag of fast food and his gps.
“Okay,” Axel hums. “Get out.”
“Excuse me?”
Axel pulled the keys out of the ignition and tossed them to his brother, “you’re driving us back home. Oh, and to CVS, mom needs sugar and milk.”
And with those buggy green eyes, Mark just completely stares at Axel, freaked out and worried (mostly because Axel’s truck is his baby, and Axel was levelheaded enough at all times to hide a body if need be), so with a reassuring smile, axel slips out of the driver side, gesturing mark to slide over the bench-seat, and he slowly walked Mark through the process of starting the car and driving back home.
He hit a curb. And ran a stop-light. Nearly hit a squirrel, but never once did axel raise his voice to him. He would simply tell him it was alright and that “it doesn’t have to be perfect; I just want you to get us home.”
When they finally pull in a few hours later, Mark was so terrified Axel would tell their mom everything, but axel just shook his head. “If I wanted you to be perfect, I wouldn’t have just thrown you into traffic; I wanted to make sure you could drive if I wasn’t around and mom needed you. You got home. We’re alive. Tomorrow, if you’re feeling easy, we’ll go to a parking lot or something. But you did fine.” He smiles and leaves the truck, “but don’t puke in the truck; do it in the front yard, please.”
Which. Mark obeys.
Whenever Mark’s birthday rolls around, Axel drives them up to an old lake house their great-grandparents built, only bringing some clothes, booze and a gas can to get in and out of town, and they fish, make s’mores, and just be kids again. Again, Mark is much younger than Axel, so all the memories Axel has here, Mark doesn’t, so he wants him to enjoy the young years of his life that Axel really couldn’t.
Sometimes, if they’re bold, they’ll bring whoever they’re dating or smashing, but they’ve found it’s better to just have a guys weekend away, only them two in the middle of the woods, with only the fish in the lake to keep them company.
“So you had a treehouse and a fuckin’ cabin before I came along?” Mark asks by the fire, marshmallow clinging to his face childishly. Axel snorts, “dude I haven’t had a birthday party since I was seven, then you showed up.”
“Oh I’m sooo sorry,” Mark sings, rolling his eyes and plopping the last of his s’more in his mouth. Axel sighs dramatically, “don’t be. You made mom happy,” he pats his brother on the shoulder. “And she said I wasn’t allowed to try and return you anymore, so.”
Mark laughs before his brows furrowed, “anymore?”
Axel smirks. “Why do you think you’re so claustrophobic now, Markie?”
“The fuck did you do to me?”
“Shoved you in a box and left you outside.”
“You WHAT.”
“Three times.”
They bicker. They fight. But they’d fucking die for each other. As they got older, they really became best friends and Mark is open to that fact.
In fact, for Axel’s birthday, Mark got his hands on a pikachu doll from the 90’s that Axel was dying to have a kid but couldn’t get because he had to help his mom take care of mark, but every now and again he brought it up to joke.
Mark could tell that, even as an adult, he still wanted that pikachu toy because he wouldn’t shut up about it, so he finally saved up and got it ($150 mint-condition his asshole), and when Axel opened it on his birthday, there was not a dry eye from anyone except Mark.
Big, green eyes flip from the toy to Mark, jaw dropped in surprise and just completely at a loss for words. Mark grins, “now you can shut up about it; you own it. Live your Ash Katchum dreams, freak.”
Axel laughs around his cries, a tattooed hand coming up to stop himself. He wastes no time in stalking his way over to his brother, pulling him in for a tight hug while the younger just hugs him back, still smiling before shoving him off when people tried to get pictures.
“Cant have people who get our Christmas card think I like you or anything,” he snorts, making Axel laugh again before going back to his seat to finish his gifts, but everyone (including himself) knew that Mark won that year.
The first time Axel brings someone home, they’re a guy. Their mom was chillin, she had no problems with it (though she didn’t really expect Morgan to necessarily be a man), Mark was pretty confused. Like, sure Axel always had friends over, but they were never cuddly and touchy before, and it made Mark really curious.
He probably brings it up on one of their fishing trips years later, and axel barely has any clue what he’s talking about at first.
“You seriously don’t remember Morgan?” Mark asks in disbelief. “Like, how do I, but you don’t?”
“I’ve been with a lot of people,” Axel shrugs. Then, he tenses up and a slow grin spreads across his face, “oh. Morgan.”
“Yes! Morgan, the first person you ever brought home!”
“They’re not Morgan anymore,” Axel recalls. “Well, to me anyways. After we broke up, they became she, and her name is Bella. We’re still close, she’s just not Morgan anymore.”
“So... are you... like...?”
Axel smirks, “I’m nothing, dude. No skin off my ass for labels. If you learn anything from me, Markie boy,” he turns to his brother, “do what makes you happy. Love who the hell you want. Mom’s going to love you. I’m gonna love you. And fuck anyone who tells you you can’t.”
“I think I’m straight.”
Axel chuckles. “You’ve just never pursued anyone who hasn’t gone after you; just so happens only women have gone after you.”
Mark frowns and sinks lower in his seat, “do you think... not-straight-guys are afraid of me?”
“I think they’re afraid of your frat-boy-fuck-buddies who tease someone for having any sort of human emotions,” Axel says nonchalantly. “I’ve taught you enough about treating people with respect, your friends don’t have the same drive you do.”
Which brings me to my next point
Axel ABSOLUTELY taught Mark about the birds and the bees.
He drove them both around town not long after Mark turned 14, and he parked at their town’s high school and just... talked about sex. What happens, how does it feel, etc..
“You need to listen to her, Mark,” he says sternly. “The minute you hear a “no,” you fucking stop. The minute you hear a ‘I don’t want to,’ you stop. I don’t care if you’re balls deep inside of her, you slip out, tuck yourself away and apologize for making her uncomfortable.”
“But what if-“
“No.”
That’s the basics; like what happens when you have sex, what how to use protection, and the importance of consent. A while later, once Mark starts going to parties, he drives them out again, only this time to talk about when she says “yes.”
“You gotta work her up,” Axel hums, cigarette low on his lips. “Her body will let you know when she’s ready. If you go in dry, you’re going to hurt her.”
“How do I like... do that?”
Axel smirks, “play with her a little. Kiss her nice and slow... let your hands paw and squeeze, let her moan a little, let her purr... I’ve been with a few girls who like being tickled and picked up, some girls like it more rough and playful too, a smack on the ass, a few bites on their neck-“
“How will I know?” Mark squeaks. “If she like... likes what I’m doing.”
Once again, Axel grins, “believe me, Markie boy- you’ll know.”
Sjfhvdgbgh I WANT MORE, MY BOYS🥺🥺
#yes I own that pikachu doll shut up#and yes it was worth every penny#axel cluney#axel cluney angst#axel cluney fluff#axel cluney imagine#axel cluney deadpool two#axel cluney deadpool 2#deadpool two#deadpool two angst#deadpool two fluff#deadpool two imagine#deadpool 2#deadpool 2 fluff#deadpool 2 angst#deadpool 2 imagine#mark#mark assassination nation#mark fluff#mark angst#mark imagine#assassination nation fluff#assassination nation angst#assassination nation imagine#axel cluney x mark#bill skarsgard#bill skarsgard angst#bill skarsgard imagine#bill skarsgard fluff#bill skarsgård
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Meeting JJ at the midsummer party and slipping and falling into his arms?
You lived on the Figure Eight, much to your dismay. It wasn’t as luxurious as literally anyone made it out to be. You hated it here, every part of it.
You hated the yachting, you hated spending all day on a boat sitting around or playing cards. You hated golfing, you once even hit your own foot as hard as you could manage with a club just to get out of it. but most of all, you hated your poser of a family, and their poser friends.
Everything was always about appearances. Appearing wealthy. Appearing happy. Appearing well mannered. It was all bullshit.
And right now, you hated the Midsummer Party.
You hated it every year it came around. Nothing made you more uncomfortable than this stupid fucking party.
You’d spend all day getting ready, prettying yourself up to your parents standards. Caked on makeup, hours of perfecting the braided crown around your head, and even making sure every loose curl that fell around your face was perfectly bouncy.
You’d wear a dress that wasn’t your style, even if it did kinda accentuate your curves...
And then you’d sit around all night, dying of boredom.
Your parents would mingle with their fake friends, brag about you where they could, and you’d wish that you could drink yourself to death.
This year however, you had the privilege of watching a certain blonde waiter make his rounds with drinks and hors d’oeuvres. You didn’t know he was a server, usually you knew all the servers because you’d spend more time talking to them than any of the Kooks.
But it was a pleasant surprise.
You'd maybe had a crush on JJ Maybank since grade school. Even though he was a Pogue and pretty well known for hating Kooks. You couldn’t help it.
He was so cute. And he was funny. And you’ve had this dumb crush on him for the longest time.
You spent most of the night just watching him with heart eyes. He looked good in a vest and slacks. Real good. It made the night a little easier.
However your legs were stating to fall asleep from sitting around all night, and it wouldn’t kill you to do a lap around the party.
Of course as soon as you caught the attention of Rafe Cameron, your mindset changed.
He let out a low whistle, his hand grabbing onto your wrist before you could keep walking.
“(y/n) (y/l/n),” He greeted, eyes raking over your body.
You couldn’t help the scoff that escaped your throat.
“You look good. Have you been here the whole night? I haven’t seen you around”
“Yeah, that’s cause I don’t like you” You reminded him, and snatched your hand out of his hold.
You often had to remind Rafe of that fact, but it never seemed to do the trick.
“You want a drink?” He asked, already taking a glass off of a passing server’s tray, handing it out to her.
“No, thanks” You shook your head, and turned to head off in any other direction.
He stopped you again, this time his grip on your wrist tighter than before.
“Rafe cut it out-”
“You know, I don’t get why you don’t just chill out and give me a chance” He said, like it annoyed him. Your brows furrowed, and you rugged on your hand again.
“Rafe, listen to me when I say this, never in a million years” You said as seriously as you could.
“Jesus Christ! Why do you have to be such a bitch all the time!” He yelled loud enough that he was gaining the attention of Kooks around them.
However, instead of realizing something shady was going on, they all juts walked away in embarrassment.
“Rafe, let me go,” You told him, trying to pull out of his grip again. “You’re acting like a crazy person” You hissed.
“And you’re acting like a stuck up bitch! Can’t you see that I just like you?”
Yeah right! You thought, and kicked him in the shin so you could finally yank your arm out out of his slightly threatening grip.
You were successful, for about two seconds.
Because you put too much force into shoving him away from him, you tripped over your heels, and next thing you know you were being sent full force into a server behind you.
Lucky enough for you, that server was quick to react, and suddenly you’re not crashing onto the floor, but you’re being held in the arms of- of course- JJ Maybank himself.
You think this might be more embarrassing than falling on your ass.
“That did not just happen” You mumbled, in shock that you even fell, but that your crush of six years is literally holding you in his very strong arms.
He chuckled, mistaking your comment as a compliment of his grace and swiftness.
“Charmed?” He asked teasingly, and then helped you back to your feet.
You were speechless as you adjusted your dress, and still a bit embarrassed by the whole thing. JJ didn't seem to mind though.
“Are you alright, though?” He asked, now glancing over to Rafe, who had stupidly stuck around, probably to bother you some more.
“She’s fine, she just tripped” Rafe answered for her, again, stupidly.
JJ already had a bone to pick with Rafe Cameron, but to see him hassling some poor girl who clearly had no interest in him would have been icing on the fucking cake. So he glared at the Kook before looking back at you.
“Are you alright?” He asked you again, his hand resting on the small of your back.
You could only manage a small nod, because he had very beautiful and very distracting blue eyes.
But when you turned back to Race, you swore you could have swung at him right then and there.
“You son of a bitch-!” You shot forward, about to slap him, or maybe grab him by the neck, you weren’t sure. But before you could decide, two hands wrapped around your hips and pulled you away.
“Woah there firecracker,” JJ laughed at your outburst, then a bit by surprise. “Let’s not make a scene”
You ignored him, for once, trying again to lunge at Rafe, but two arms wrapped around your middle, pretty much trapping you in place.
And then you were being dragged away completely, because JJ was starting to get the feeling that you were more of a fighter than you seemed
“I swear to god Rafe, if you ever touch me again I will hit you with my car!” You screamed after him, despite JJ dragging your ass away from him. “If you even look at me again I’ll do it! I will!”
“Okay, calm down princess,” JJ hushed once he got you around a corner, away from the prying eyes of the Kooks.
He finally released his hold on you, and despite really wanting to, you didn’t make a break to finish what Race started. You stayed put in front of him.
“The hell was that about? He bother you often?” He asked, his hands on his hips like he was scolding you.
Well, he was scolding you.
“Often? Try every day. It’s Rafe. You know Rafe, right?” You scoffed.
It dawned on JJ that he didn’t know you all that well, which was odd, because your personality was bursting at the seams, and so far you seemed pretty cool. For a Kook.
“Right,” He chuckled. “Something tells me though that you’ve never tried to kill him before”
He was still laughing, and your brows furrowed, before you crossed your arms.
“Are you making fun of me?” You asked, making him laugh more.
“I mean, you’re kinda hilarious”
“Hilarious? You think I wouldn’t hit that asshole with my car? Because I will- I’ll run him down-”
“I believe you, I believe you,” JJ cut you off before you could say anything too incriminating. “You’re just, a Kook, is all”
That didn’t seem to help, as now you were leaning back against the wall you were standing at, and your brow raised.
“And what makes you think that makes me any less murderous, hm?”
He laughed, and was about to say something stupid, probably. Some off handed flirty remark that usually worked on the girls around The Cut, but before he could pick one of the lines, a security guard was grabbing him by the back of his vest.
“You’re not a server here, are you?” The large man asked.
“Ooh, tough question. Am I serving the people? Yes. Am I being paid? Unfortunately not. I’d like to have a discussion about a raise though!”
“Alright, can it Maybank” The guard muttered, not amused one bit by JJ’s clever banter.
You watched with great amusement as JJ was dragged away, similar to the way he’d just dragged you away from Rafe.
“Doesn’t feel too good, does it?” You called with a shit eating grin, following next to the guard.
Darryl was his name, he always worked the Midsummer Party.
“I like you. We should hang out” JJ replied smoothly.
You giggled, and tapped Darryl on the shoulder.
“You can let him go, he’s with me” You said in your sweet Kook voice.
“This guy?” Darryl asked, looking down at JJ unsurely. “Thornton and Cameron just told me he was causing some trouble-”
“Don’t pay them any mind Darryl, they’re just jealous,” You replied, and wrapped your arm through JJ’s as casually as you could manage. “You know they’re always up to no good” You added for good measure.
The guard still seemed unsure, eyes sliding between you and JJ. Something didn’t add up.
But he wasn’t paid enough for this.
“He’s your date now?” He asked, mostly because that’s what he would say when inevitably some high ranking Kook got upset at the presence of a Pogue at their party.
“Sure is” You replied confidently.
And just like that, he was heading off, not bothering to ask any other questions.
You grinned, and pulled your arm out of JJ’s.
“So, you want to hang out now?”
___
a/n this was longer than I planned but I like it :3
#outer banks#outer banks fanfiction#jj maybank#jj maybank x reader#jj maybank scenario#jj maybank imagine
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Bad - Rex x Reader x Wolffe
Warnings: Smut, dirty Talk, phone sex, double penetration, unprotected sex.
Tags: @littlevodika @hxldmxdxwn @maulieber i promised, babies.
Words: 4680 (BROO)
Requests are open
Please, reblog c:
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It was late. An insane hour for you to be awake and thinking the thoughts that were wedged into your brain. But there you were, laying in bed, willing away the scandalous thoughts of the things you would do to your boyfriend if he were home with you. As luck would have it, he was away on a mission, lone wolfing it and leaving Rex and Wolffe to look after you while the others were working on their own separate jobs. You assured him that you'd be fine and didn't need 'looking after'.
"You never know when you might need something, Y/N." He warned you. So instead of dragging it out and making a big deal out of nothing, you let it roll off of your back.
You hated when Fives made you stay home instead of assisting him on cases. He undermined your abilities and babied you. Even though you knew his intentions were good, it still irked you. But above all, what you hated most was the agreement that he constructed.
"Tell it to me one more time, baby doll." He requested. You rolled your eyes and sighed before reciting the one rule you couldn't bend or break.
"No touching myself while you're gone." Fives smiled, clearly satisfied with your reply. He bent down to kiss you on the forehead and stroke your hair.
"These two weeks will be over before you know it. Be good."
The sound of your holocommunicator buzzing on your nightstand shook you from the memory.
Speak of the Devil.
"Hey there, stranger."
You heard him chuckle softly on the other end of the call. "Hey, sweetheart. How's my girl holding up?"
You played with hem of your t-shirt and sighed. "Bored. Horny. Missing my boyfriend. All in all, I could be better."
The smile Fives wore was heard though the words that he spoke, "That's a dangerous combo you got going there. Have you been good, Y/N?"
His presumptuous tone made you roll your eyes. "Yes, Fiv. I'm fighting with every bone in my body, but I've been a good girl."
"I know it's hard, doll. But I promise, you'll get a reward for following the rules so well." You could hear the shuffling on the other end and you knew Fives was back in his quarters and undressing for the night. You pictured him loosening his belt and unbuttoning his pants before removing his shirt. The image of your half naked boyfriend made you ache.
"Fives, baby, please tell me you're coming home soon. I'm dying over here." You didn't care how desperate and pathetic you sounded.
The bed creaked under Fives weight and you knew he was laying down now. "Mmm, my girl just wants to cum so bad, doesn't she?" Good god, he was just toying with you now. You groaned and closed your eyes, replaying the last time you and Fives had sex - just before he left. You could still hear the slapping of his skin against yours echoing through your ears. "You want my cock buried so deep inside of your tight little pussy, don't you, Y/N? Want me hitting that sweet spot so hard and fast, huh?"
You gripped the sheets in your hands and twisted your legs to alleviate some of the pressure between them. "Fives," You warned.
"Or do you want me in your mouth? You know how I love looking into those gorgeous eyes while I have my hand caught in your hair and watching my dick disappear past those pretty lips." His breath was becoming ragged and you could hear the faint lather from the lotion he squeezed into his hand. Fuck.
"Goddammit, Fives, you're killing me," You whined into the receiver. It would be so easy to just snake your hand between your thighs. He wouldn't even know-
"Don't even think about it, Y/N. You won't get your reward if you do that." What, did he have surveillance set up in your room or something? "Come on, be a good girl and help me out..."
He was torturing you already, and now he wanted assistance while jacking himself off. Phone sex isn't the most fun when only one person is able to please themselves, but you knew better than to go against his wishes. If he wants a cock tease, then you were gonna give him hell. He deserved it.
"Mmm, yes, daddy. I want you in my mouth so bad. It's so warm and wet and ready for you." You rolled your tongue around in your mouth and licked your lips. You were only teasing yourself more.
"That's more like it. Tell me more, Y/N." He urged you on in a gruff voice.
"I wanna feel your cum fill my mouth and slide down my throat. Wanna suck you off until you're all nice and clean again." Using your finger, you made a popping sound with your mouth for emphasis. "Then I wanna kiss back up your body, graze my teeth against your nipples just the way you like, making my way to that spot just below your ear, you know, the one that makes you go crazy."
Grunts and groans were your only replies besides whispered curses under Fives's breath. You could picture him perfectly. Naked. Skin glistening with sweat, glowing under the dim lighting. Muscles tense as he pumped himself into his slick hand. But still, you continued with your torment. "Then I wanna feel your hands all over me. Pulling my hair and gripping my skin. Mmm, I want you to slowly reach down between my thighs and play with my clit." You smiled upon hearing Fives whimper at the thought.
"Y/N, I'm close baby, just a little—ah—more," He could barely speak above a whisper at the pace he was going.
"I wanna throw you on the bed and have my way with you. Wanna ride you for everything you're worth. Feel that big cock stretching me. Grind against you while you rub my tits. Come on baby, cum for me." You moaned, begging for his release so you could end your own torture. A strangled groan and shortened breaths signaled that his orgasm struck. Your mouth watered at the thought of his chest and stomach painted with the white stickiness.
Fives took a minute to compose himself and slow his heart rate, clearing his throat before speaking again. "Fuck, darlin'. I love it when you talk dirty like that." He was smirking. You could tell.
"I'm glad you enjoyed it." Whining usually wasn't your thing, but you craved the relief you had just granted for him.
"Don't worry. I promise, I'll make it up to you. Get some rest, I'll call in again tomorrow. Sweet dreams, Y/N." And with that, he hung up.
Tossing your phone aside, you slid down the headboard and laid on your back with an unfulfilled groan. But you did as told, letting sleep take over your deprived body until morning came.
You had slept in a little later than usual due to your late night antics. The smell of coffee had awakened your senses and it called out to you. Stretching your limbs as you walked down the halls and into the kitchen, you offered Rex a sleepy smile when he handed you a steaming mug.
He laughed softly and matted your hair down a bit. "Looks like you had a rough night, huh kid?"
You rolled your eyes at the memory and sipped your drink. "Your best friend is an asshole." You spoke from behind the cup.
Rex wore a smirk that you couldn't quite read. The look in his eyes made a chill run down your spine and his stare was lasting longer than usual. "Come on, Y/N, he's not all that bad. In fact, sometimes he can be pretty damn great."
Okay, now that was weird. Rex rarely ever shows appreciation towards Fives like this. You didn't get to think too hard on his strange behavior before he spoke again. "Just let me know if you need anything. Anything at all, okay, Y/N?" He walked behind you to exit the room. What surprised you was that he spanked your ass softly before leaving.
What the hell?
"What the hell do you mean you're not leaving until tomorrow, Fives?" There you go whining again. He was supposed to have been almost home by now.
"Turns out I didn't finish the job as well as I thought. I'm pretty sure I just made this thing angrier than before." The speeder's engine shut off and you heard the footprints on the ground.
"I told you to let one of us go with you, but God forbid you listen to me." The irritation in your voice was evident.
"Doll, I'll be fine. I'm actually meeting up with Echo for reinforcement. We'll kill this son of a bitch and I'll race my ass back home to you, okay?"
Sighing, you ran your hand through your hair and shrugged. "Okay, Fives. Be careful. I love you."
"I love you, too, Y/N. I'll call after the job is done. Be good." He gave his usual warning before ending the call.
Tossing your phone on the bed, you left your room in search of a distraction.
Great. Now I'm boyfriendless and horny beyond belief. Stupid fucking rule. Hey, maybe if I sit on the washing machine naked, it won't count against me because I'm not technically touching myself...
Your thoughts were interrupted by hushed voices talking in the living room. The only ones here besides you were Rex and Wolffe. They were obviously talking about something serious, and you didn't want to disturb their conversation, so you did the only thing you could do. Hide behind the wall and eavesdrop.
"Yeah, he called me last night and told me the same thing." You heard Rex say.
"Do you think we should take him up on his offer?" Wolffe asked.
Rex chuckled. "I mean, have you looked at Y/N? We'd be crazy not to at least ask her."
Your brows furrowed at the sound of your name. What the hell were they talking about?
"And we have his consent..." Wolffe lingered on that statement. "You're right, this is too good of a proposal to let go to waste. Let's go talk to Lady Y/N."
Rounding the corner as if you hadn't been standing there for the entire conversation, you walked down the steps and repeated Wolffe. "Talk to Lady Y/N about what?"
When their eyes met yours, it sent a chill down your spine. They shared a look of curiosity trying to disguise itself as something else. Lust. You'd know the look of lust anywhere. But why it was directed at you from someone other than Fives, you didn't have a clue. Wolffe licked his lips and stepped closer to you, extending his hand for you take and follow him over to where Rex was leaning casually against the back of the couch.
"You seem so tense, Y/N." Rex spoke softly from behind you as his hands started to rub the knots out of your neck. Instantly, you relaxed into his touch. You didn't know if it was his warmth, or that you were craving contact, but you let your eyes fall shut as he continued his decent to your shoulders.
Without having to open your eyes, you felt Wolffe's presence close the space between your bodies. His breath fanned over your face as he pushed your hair behind your ear and out of your face. "Why are you so tense, Y/N?" His voice was no higher than a gruff whisper.
"Tell us, littlu'n." Rex urged from behind you, his fingers now sliding down your arms.
"I haven't had sex in over two weeks. Fives doesn't let me touch myself when he's away." You don't know why you confessed as easily as you did. Rex and Wolffe were some of your best friends, and you talked about everything under the sun. But you all usually kept your sex lives under wraps. "All I want is to be touched. I want release so bad and I can't have it."
Rex's warm breath hitting the back of your neck made you shiver as Wolffe glided his fingers across the hem of your shirt. "You know, we would be more than happy to help you, Y/N. Give you what you crave most." Wolffe said as his knuckles lightly brushed against your hipbones.
"Honored." Rex corrected him.
At this admittance, your eyes shot open. You didn't know who too look at. Both Wolffe and Rex shared the same calm look that didn't show any sign of joking. Before you could start bombarding them with questions and accusations, you were silenced.
"Fives told us to assist you while he's on his mission. He said to do whatever you asked of us." Wolffe informed you.
"Said it was your reward for being such a good little girl." Rex continued.
That's when you knew it had to be true. Only Fives would say something like that to you. Although, it sounded wonderful coming from his best friend's mouth. You were already getting off on how close they were to you. Like they said, you'd be crazy not to take him up on his offer. So you let yourself relax back into Rex's chest, bringing one of your arms up to rest on Wolffe's shoulder while the other snaked around the back of Rex's neck.
"So, how is this gonna work boys?" You asked, looking from one man to the other.
Wolffe and Rex looked up at each other, silently asking each other if you had really just agreed to this. After letting the realization set in, they couldn't help the grin that played on their lips. "How ever you want it to work, Y/N. You call the shots." Wolffe slowly dragged his lips up your arm, grazing his teeth along your shoulder. "We've been instructed to do whatever you like, my lady. Your wish, is our command."
Both of them coaxing you from each end was stimulating your senses. Your body was already on fire and they had hardly even done anything yet. And it dawned on you that you didn't have to be Fives's good little girl for the night. Being good all of the time was exhausting. You wanted to rebel. You wanted to be bad. The beast inside of you was awakening at the thought of all the possibilities.
You reached for both of their hands and smirked at them, leading them to your bedroom. Once inside, you closed the door and rested your back against it. Your tongue darted out to lick your lips slowly, drawing their attention to your mouth. They closed the space between your bodies when you beckoned them over. One of your hands slid up and down Wolffe's chest, while the other mimicked the same action to Rex. "Did Fives give you any rules that you have to abide by?"
They both shook their heads no. "He said anything you want, goes." Rex breathed out.
You smiled and pulled him closer by his collar, bringing his mouth to yours. Your lips ghosted over his gently. "Good." Pulling Wolffe closer as well, you tugged on his bottom lip with your teeth. "Because I wanna feel, taste, every inch of the two of you." Your words earned a moan from both men. "So get comfortable boys," You squeezed past them, peeling your shirt off as you sauntered over to your bed. "It's gonna be a long night."
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Kneeling on your mattress, you silently used your finger to beckon them over to you. They sat at each side, Rex to your right and Wolffe to your left, eagerly awaiting your next move. You crawled behind Wolffe and slid your hands down his chest, latching your mouth to the back of his ear and sucking a soft bruise there while you gathered the hem of his shirt and pulled it off of his frame. He tilted his head to the side and exhaled slowly, shuddering when your fingers trailed over his pectorals and left goosebumps in their wake. Then, you moved over to Rex, pulling his t-shirt over his head and discarding it with the rest of the clothes.
"Kneel." You motioned for Rex to mirror your stance on the bed. He did as told, kneeling behind you. Wolffe watched and waited for you to give him an order.
"Come here, Wolffe." Relishing in the way you said his name, he shivered, his eyes slowly hazing over as he too came to a kneeling position in front of you.
The two men sandwiched you between them, giving you little to no space to move. You backed your ass into Rex's crotch, grinding slowly. His jeans grew tighter as he grunted and rested his hands on your hips. Your hands slid up and down Wolffe's toned chest, enjoying the feeling of his abs underneath your fingertips. When your eyes met, you smirked and leaned into him, crashing your lips against his. Wolffe cupped your face in his hands, deepening the kiss. His lips parted just enough for you to slip your tongue past them, making him groan at the feeling of your tongue massaging his. Your hips never stopped moving against Rex's as you occupied Wolffe with your mouth. When you pulled away from Wolffe, one of your arms slipped around the back of Rex's neck, tugging on the ends of his hair until his head was forced back to give you access to his neck. You sucked on his pulse point until your name fell from his lips.
Wolffe watched in amazement for a moment until he noticed your half bare chest being unattended to. He palmed your breasts through your bra roughly, to which your responded with a moan against Rex's skin. Rex's hands gripped you tighter as the vibrations from your mouth beat against his throat..
"You know, Fives always handles me like I'm made of glass. Always so gentle with me. Calls me his good little girl," You tilted your head up so that your mouth brushed against Rex's fervently as you arched into Wolffe's touch. Wolffe leaned down to your chest and nipped at your skin, sucking over the marks he made with his teeth. One of Rex's hands pushed into the back of your shorts, squeezing your ass harshly. "But not you." You breathed out, leaning your head on Rex's chest. "You take me for what I really am."
Wolffe glided his hands up your sides and looked up at you from where his face was buried between your breasts. "And what are you really, Y/N?"
A slap to the back of your thigh stopped you from answering. Instead, you moaned through a bitten lip. "A bad girl." Rex replied for you. You could hear the grin on his lips without having to look at him. "Mmm, I bet you're a naughty little thing in bed, aren't you, littlu'n?" His voice was beautifully gruff. All you could do was nod.
"I bet you like it nice and rough, don't you, Y/N?" Wolffe mumbled into the crook of your neck as he kissed his way upward. Again, you nodded. "Tell us. Let us know what you like. We want to pleasure you to the fullest of our abilities, my lady."
Just thinking of all the possibilities that the two of them could do to your body was enough to surrender you useless. But you weren't about to roll over and play the good little girl role again. They were going to do what you wanted, alright.
Taking the wrist of each man, you led their hands to each side of your ass. "I like to be spanked."
Rex and Wolffe shared a look and smiled before drawing back and slapping your skin. You knew your ass was blushed from the sting without having to look back at it. The men kneaded your flesh in the palms of their hands to soothe the sweet ache.
"Go on, cyare." Rex nuzzled his nose against the shell of your ear as he pushed your shorts down your legs. Wolffe held you while Rex pulled them the rest of the way off.
Your breath was shaky as you sighed. "Bitten. I like to be bitten. Clawed at. I want bruises in the form of your fingertips scattered all over my body." Your chest was heaving and you had to choke down a moan at the thought of it all.
The smirk that was plastered on Wolffe's lips sent a shiver down your spine. He trailed his fingers down your sides, his nails digging into your skin and leaving marks that led to your panties. You sighed contently, resting your head on Rex's shoulder as he unhooked your bra and discarded it. Wolffe hunched over on his knees, propping himself up on his elbows as his fingers massaged your thighs harshly. His thumb slowly brushed against your clothed clit, making you whimper.
Rex wrapped your hair around his hand and tugged your head back to look at him. Your bottom lip was held captive by your teeth as another moan escaped the back of your throat from his aggressiveness. His free hand traveled down your neck, to your chest, and finally to your ample breast. He took your nipple between his thumb and forefinger, twisting and teasing the bud.
"Look at me." Rex's demand was met. Your mouth was gaped and your eyes clouded with lust. Rex's tongue traced your bottom lip as Wolffe peppered kisses along your inner thigh.
Although you loved the attention being paid to you, you felt as if you were losing control. You carded your fingers though Wolffe's hair and pulled until he was at eye level with you. "Lay. Now." He obliged, laying back on the pillows and watching for your next order. You peeled off your panties, tossing them away carelessly. "Bare down, fellas. We've got work to do."
They did as instructed, stripping down and waiting for your next command. After telling Rex to wait at the foot of the bed, you crawled over to Wolffe, leaving open mouthed kisses up the path of his body until you reached his lips. His throbbing hard on brushed against your leg, emitting a hiss from the Maker beneath you. "You know, I'd be more than happy to help you out with that," You whispered softly into his ear. He groaned in response. "But only if you return the favor."
Before he could speak, you pecked his lips and moved up to straddle his face. You faced Rex, grinning at the sight of his slack jaw as he watched Wolffe tease your already soaked folds. You never took your eyes off of him as you leaned down and took Wolffe's cock into your hand. When your grip tightened around Wolffe's tip, he licked a long, hard strip along your cunt. A strangled groan sounded from deep inside of your throat and you licked your lips, looking back and forth between Rex's eyes and his unattended to length. He got the hint and made his way over to you.
Rex pumped himself in his hand a few times while you retrieved the lube from your bedside table and squirted some into your palm, slicking Wolffe's dick with it. You smiled at Rex and crashed your lips to his passionately before showering his skin with kisses, trailing down his stomach. Your tongue licked along his shaft before you sucked him into your mouth. His hand tangled into your hair, guiding your head back and forth on him.
"Harder." Your command was muffled due to your full mouth, but obliged. Rex tightened his grasp and pulled your head back, thrusting his hips in sync with you.
Your motions never let up on Wolffe. You continued to pump him tight in your clutch, twisting your wrist and rubbing your thumb along the vein under his tip. When he began to suck on your clit, it was the beginning of your downfall. He snaked his arms around your thighs as you rode his mouth for all it was worth until you came. Moans and straggled breaths were the only sounds echoing around the room as he helped you ride it out.
You knew it was only a matter of time before they followed suit. With a flick of the wrist and hollowed cheeks, you got what you wanted. Rex's load filled your mouth as Wolffe's spewed over your chest and stomach.
After swallowing Rex's cum, you licked up Wolffe's until he was clean of the sticky substance. You fell to your back and smiled to yourself, still in bliss from what had just happened. Rex kissed your temple and Wolffe moved the hair away from your face. You let your eyes fall shut and hummed softly.
"Anything else we can do for you, cyary'ika?" Wolffe asked.
"Anything at all?" Rex pressed.
You could lie, you were already warn out. A certain amount of time without sexual exertion can feel like running a marathon once you finally get back in the game. But it had been too long, and the craving for it only grew stronger. There was no chance in hell that this opportunity was going to happen again, so why not take full advantage of it?
Rex and Wolffe were laying on their sides, waiting for your answer. They knew from your grin that you weren't finished with them. Their calm gentleness was replaced with dominate roughness as they each took a leg and spread you open. Rex's teeth nipped at your throat while Wolffe clawed his way up your thigh. They each took a nipple into their mouths, taunting and teasing in such a delicious fashion that you felt the room spin.
You ran your hands through their hair and pulled them up to look at you. "Enough teasing. Fuck me already." You half pleaded, half commanded.
Both men helped you up and positioned you between them, Rex in front of you and Wolffe behind. You ground your hips into Rex's and pulled Wolffe in for a bruising kiss. Both of them were hesitant, not wanting to hurt you in any way, but you quickly assured them.
"I'm fine, I can take it. Just please, I can't wait any more. I need you, please, I need both of you." You didn't care how pathetic you sounded. All the teasing had you more turned on than ever and you longed to be filled to the highest extent.
Wolffe slowly eased himself into you after coating himself with the lubricant. You sighed and rested your head in the crook of his neck as he rubbed circles into your hips to soothe you.
"Come on, Cap. Can't get this party started without you." Despite your approval, Rex was still timid. You stroked his cheek and pulled him close until your lips brushed against his. "Please, Rex. You don't know how bad I need this. How bad I need you. " You whispered against his mouth.
He whimpered, nodding and readying himself before sliding into you with ease. Groans and sighs emitted from each of you as they allowed you time to adjust to their lengths. After signaling that it was okay to move, they rocked their hips back and forth, switching speeds and going in and out of sync with each other.
There wasn't much you could do besides help spring them on. Your hands caressed every inch of Rex while your mouth took care of Wolffe. You felt Wolffe twitch inside of you, which in turn made your walls tense around him and Rex. They were trying their damnedest to hold back until you came first. Sloppy thrusts and hot mouths all deemed you to your end.
You came hard, feeling your slickness slide down your thighs as Rex and Wolffe continued until their orgasms hit. You were filled to the hilt. Their actions slowed to a complete stop and they slowly pulled out of you, laying you down gently.
You all were still fighting to regulate your breathing as you lay tangled up in one another. Rex rolled over to his side and nuzzled his face into your neck. "Fives is one lucky motherfucker."
You laughed softly and pushed his hair out of his face. Rex's communicator rang from the back of his jean pocket. As he got up to answer it, Wolffe pulled you closer and kissed your lips sweetly. Rex's voice was muffled for the most part, but he turned around to look at you and Wolffe as he spoke.
"Yeah, Fives. She was a very good girl."
(masterlist)
#clone troopers#clone trooper rex#clone trooper fives#clone trooper smut#captain rex smut#captain rex#commander wolffe smut#commander wolffe#arc trooper fives#arc trooper echo
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Midnight Romeo Ch. 1
Series: The Owl House Pairing: Beta!Luz/Beta!Amity
Luz Noceda finds herself frequenting night clubs to cope with her loneliness. She never expects to find anyone, really, until she’s forced to save a pretty girl from a nasty creep harassing her. Please support the original on Ao3! (trigger warnings for alcohol consumption and minor sexual harassment)
12:35am. The flashing lights and blaring dubstep over massive stereo systems was enough to overwhelm anyone, especially Luz Noceda. She wasn’t really even sure why she kept coming here. For drinks? People-watching? Moping, hoping for a stranger to reach out a hand to her and make a connection? Probably all of the above. Yet, despite how agonizingly crowded the place was and how much it reeked of Mary Jane and sweat, she sat alone at the bar, sipping on her second glass of whiskey and watching wasted hornballs grind on each other. Luz was a pretty lonely person. She didn’t really have friends to spend time with, her mom worked hectic nights at the hospital to the point where they barely saw each other, and she had nothing but shitty breakups with shitty partners who left her feeling more and more closed up. Nobody could envy her right now. Any last shreds of hope that some gorgeous, charming person would approach her and suavely sweep her off her feet, were stomped on by her own cynicism. After all, who would want her ? Slumped over the bar in an unwashed army jacket, uncombed hair and beanie, probably reeking of booze. Hah, yeah. A real catch, huh. Her self-deprecating thoughts were interrupted, however, when a shorter, punky looking girl ran up to her and wrapped arms around her. “Oh my god, hiii! I haven’t seen you in so long , babe!” came a peppy, raspy voice from the girl. Luz froze, completely shocked and incredibly confused at just what was happening right now. As well as a little bit flustered, because this girl was very pretty. Before she had a chance to speak, however, the mysterious girl whispered in her ear “ Just go with it, creepy guy behind me ”. Ah. Luz’s demeanor changed in a heartbeat, cracking a smile and hugging the girl back. “Hey! What are you doing here? It’s been ages!” Pulling away from the hug, she looked passed the girl’s green-dyed hair to see a seething man walking directly towards them. “Hey Amity, who’s this girl? Some friend of yours?” He asked through a fake, gritted smile. Oh, Luz could feel the rotten vibes emanating from him. “Yeah, the name’s Luz. Amity here is one of my friends from college. May I ask who you are?”
The strange man crossed his arms, a smug grin crossing his face. “Yeah, I’m her man of the night. And we’ll be going now, actually.” Venom dripped from each of his words as he tried to grab at Amity’s wrist. The shorter girl struggled and mumbled “Let go” as she tried to pull away, and a new flame entered Luz’s gaze. She stood up and towered half a head over the man, staring at him with an intense anger, reaching into her jacket pocket for her switchblade. “I don’t think she wants to go with you. Now let her go, or I’ll slice that hand clean off your wrist.” Luz scowled, flipping the blade open. The man visibly flinched, but stood his ground for a few moments more before finally letting go. “Whatever, fucking cunt. She’s an ugly bitch anyway.” He mumbled as he walked back into the crowd. Luz closed her switchblade and looked back down at the green haired girl, who was now rubbing the spot where her wrist had been so roughly grabbed. Amity looked up at the taller girl in appreciation. “Thanks, uh.. You said your name was Luz? Thank you. I swear to god, men don’t know how to take fucking ‘no’ for an answer.” Luz sighed, and patted her shoulder. “Yeah, guys can be real creeps sometimes, especially at places like this. I’m just glad he didn’t do worse to you. Are you okay?” Amity grumbled, and hopped up on a bar chair next to the taller girl. “Well, not really. My friends bailed on me and I’ve been trying to ward off these dipshit guys all night. I don’t see how anyone enjoys these places.” Luz stifled a chuckle. “Yeah, I hear ya. But if you hate it so much, why are you here?” Amity let out a heavy sigh. “I came because my friends asked me to. This isn’t usually my deal, but they were insistent. Then they had the gall to fucking leave me here alone. Assholes.” She mumbled, laying her head on the counter. “They don’t really sound like friends if they’re just gonna leave you here.” Luz offered. Amity noticeably shrank when she said that. “Yeah, well, they’re kinda my only option as far as friends go… And they were my ride here too, hah .” She laughed bitterly. The two of them were silent for a few moments, only being enveloped in the sound of the music over loudspeakers. At one point, the bartender asked if Amity wanted a drink. She lifted her head and ordered a long island iced tea, much to Luz’s surprise. When asked if she wanted a refill on her whiskey, Luz declined, and turned back to Amity. “So, you don’t have a ride home then?” Amity shook her head. “It’s probably fine. I’ll just grab an Uber, or beg one of my siblings to pick me up, haha.” Her laugh was tired, and her eyes looked tired as well.
While Amity silently drank, Luz watched her - taking in her appearance. Her eyes were sharp and golden, with thick, black, winged eyeliner and smokey eyeshadow. Her nose was long and pierced through the septum. Her lips were thin, covered in black lipstick and adorned with black metal snake bites. Her hair was messy, tousled and long, reaching halfway down her back. Her ears were covered in black piercings, and she wore a fitted band tee and a pink plaid miniskirt. Truly, this girl was stunning. Luz couldn’t help but wonder if this was the princess charming she had so long been wishing for- ‘Ugh, don’t be stupid’ She thought to herself, and quickly stamped out the idea. Her main concern should be how to get this girl home, anyways. Her friends left her, she’s apparently been dealing with sexual harassment all night, and she’s probably going to be wasted on long island teas before she leaves. “So… Are you gonna text your sibs for a ride?” Amity finished the remains of her glass before slamming it back down on the table. “Yeah I guess I should, probably. They’ll probably make fun of me for getting so wasted, but it’s fine, whatever.” She took out her phone and started quickly typing a message with her thumbs, before setting it down on the bar. She called the bartender back over to order another tea, then slumped back on the counter. “Uh, you sure another one is a good idea chica ? Especially after the night you’ve had?” The green-haired girl rolled her head to look at Luz, with a dead stare. “While I appreciate your concern, I kinda don’t care right now.” Her phone buzzed and she picked it up to look at the new text, before slapping it back down with a loud groan. “UGH, of COURSE they’re too busy to pick me up. Fuckin great.” Luz bit her lip, wondering what the next step should be. I mean, she barely met this girl, But after the night she’d had, she didn’t want to risk this Amity girl having another run off with a creepy guy. And she knew from experience that Ubers and Lyfts weren’t always the safest to ride in as a drunk girl. “Hey… Uh, do you need me to give you a ride home then? I really don’t mind.” She waited in silence for a moment, while Amity turned to look at her. “I’m fine, I’ll be fine. Just need to order an Uber, it’s fine..” She trailed off, pulling up the app on her phone. “Listen, I really don’t mind driving you. I’ve had some… not so fun experiences riding drunk in an Uber. They don’t do background checks on those guys, and especially since you’ve been through so much from creeps tonight...” Luz trailed off. Amity let out a huge sigh. “...Okay, fine. But you better not try anything weird either. I can and will fuck you up, or break your car window open.” Luz internally breathed a sigh of relief. She definitely understood not trusting a stranger to drive her home, but she didn’t want this girl to go through worse than she had already experienced tonight.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1:21am. They walked out of the bar, Luz had mostly sobered up, and supported the shorter girl so she didn’t stumble or trip on the way to her car. Luz’s car wasn’t anything special - it was an old 2002 Honda Accord, silver and a little beat up, but she was sure to keep it clean and in functioning shape. She opened the passenger door for amity with a polite gesture, and made sure she was all the way in before shutting the door and returning to the driver’s side.
“Wow, your car is old.” Amity said bluntly. Luz laughed. “Yeah? Your point? I still keep her running like a dream. Why? Are you not used to old bangups?” Amity crossed her arms, embarrassed. “Well, my parents are all about having the newest thing. They all got brand new shit at home, fancy imported cars and that shit. They got me a brand new Maserati for my birthday this year. So yeah, I’m not used to ‘old bangups’ I guess.” She looked out the window while Luz started up the engine, and popped in a CD. The music started playing on low, Amity tuning in to the song that was playing.
‘You’re the beach on Christmas Eve,’
‘Wrong place, good time, consistently’
‘I feel like a walking love song’
‘When you do me like that, can you tell my brain turns off’ It seemed to fit the atmosphere pretty well, actually. Luz rolled down the window and let her arm hang out, bringing a much-needed cool breeze into the car. Amity could feel herself nodding off, despite trying to fight it. ‘This girl, Luz… can I really trust her? I mean, she seems really cool, and it’s nice of her to drive me home, but… ‘ Amity’s thoughts ran slowly through her head. She raised her head to look over at the girl in the driver’s seat. She really did have a cool aura about her. The army jacket and baggy cargo pants, while normally not Amity’s style, seemed to fit the girl. Her messy hair, red beanie, adorned with a pin Amity couldn’t see in the dark. She noticed Luz was singing along to the song under her breath. It was kind of cute, actually. ‘From 7-11s to California Heavens’
‘I try to hide with my words, but you just find me clever’
‘I found a million places, you’d be worth the chases’
‘To go-oh-oh’
Finally, they pull into a long driveway, protected by overbearing steel gates. Luz stopped the car, and looked up at the massive home behind them. “You live here , Amity? Damn, are you just rich as shit or something?” Amity sighed, clicked off her seatbelt and opened the door. “My family is rich as shit, yes. I try not to think about it.” Luz unblocked her seatbelt and rose to get out of the car, making sure Amity could get in alright. “Oh, wait! Here, hang on a second.” She said, running back to her car to grab something.
Amity stood before the gates for only a few seconds, before Luz came back with a scrap of paper. “Listen, not that you’ll need it, but…” She looked embarrassed, rubbing the nape of her neck anxiously. “If your friends ever bail on you again or you need to get rid of any more creeps, here’s my number.” Luz handed the scrap to Amity, before shoving both hands in her jacket pockets. Amity looked down at the paper, then back up to Luz, with a smile. “Heh, thanks Luz… Maybe I’ll take you up on that. Amity brushed a piece of hair behind her ear, and turned toward the gates to her house. “Oh, and… Thank you for all your help tonight. Usually people aren’t so kind.” Those words were her last before opening the gates and walking inside.
Luz slumped back into her car, waiting until the girl was fully inside her house before buckling up and starting up the engine. ‘Well, that’s certainly not how I thought my night would go.’ She felt a buzz in her pocket, and pulled out her phone to find a new message from an unknown number. xxx-xxx-xxxx: Hey, this is Amity. Thanks again for tonight. Luz smiled, and quickly registered the girl in her contacts. As she backed out of the manor driveway, she felt a lightness in her chest that she hadn’t felt in a long time. Maybe going out to clubs wasn't all that bad.
#toh#lumity#beta lumity#they're 21-22 in this btw#figure since its my first fic i'd crosspost it here ahaha
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Okey, how about something actual. How would RFA + Minor Trio react if they and MC were separated, like had quarantine in different cities. How would they behave alone? How often would they call her? Would they be worried about her health? I love your writing. Stay awsome and healthy!
RFA + Minor Trio being in quarantine in different cities
Tbh I was just about to delete your requests, lolol I HAD THE SAME IDEA AND HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH WE ARE SOULMATES! Enjoy and stay healthy you all! To be honest I am enjoying my Quarantine time ( my co worker has Corona and I worked with her so she may has infected me) but it’s serious, we need to stay healthy, take a lot of vitamins and stay at home! If you don’t want to stay at home do it for the elderly! STAY AT HOME!
PS.: My test was negative
Jumin
You sobbed into the camera as you saw Jumin smiling sadly at you.
,,Can’t come back?’’ you asked him.
He shook his head.
If he had known this, he would have never gone to Italy for the business trip.
Jumin Han was just glad that he didn’t take you along.
,,Stay at home, Mc. I will try my best to come to you soon,’’ he promised and then cut the call since it was pretty late for you.
Days went by and Jumin noticed that he was a big man with a lot of influence, but outside of Korea he was no one.
And so, Jumin had to stay in Italy for the next time.
He chatted with you daily, tried to see your face as often as possible, and made sure that you would stay healthy.
But then he noticed how bad the situation was in Italy.
,,Jumin, since you’re there, maybe you could support them, without going out please!’’ you begged him.
And indeed, Jumin tried to change something in Italy; supporting them with masks and hygienical products.
Jumin Han also gave people in need a lot of money, gained their trust and helped them to go on with the situation.
A new project began and ended successfully.
,,Don’t tell my wife that I’m back,’’ he then said after he finally returned.
He couldn’t wait to hug you and see you again. However, he first wanted to stay in quarantine on his own, getting tested and staying away from you to make sure that you wouldn’t be at risk because of him.
And the happiness of seeing you was much bigger afterwards.
Zen
,,I can’t come back, Zen,’’ you sighed into the phone as Korea announced that no one was allowed to go out.
Just a week before this all began you went to visit your parents to make sure that they had enough water and food so that they wouldn’t need to step out.
Now neither them or you were allowed to step out and you couldn’t stay with Zen.
,,Stay healthy, wash your hands and don’t go out,’’ you told him and brushed your hair.
,,Princess, I would have loved to do Netflix and chill with you every evening,’’ he whispered into the phone, making you blush in a dark red.
,,Oh Zenny, stop!’’ you giggled and sat back, imagining what you guys could have done.
You knew that the time without Zen would be hard, especially because he needed you.
Not just to have a balanced lifestyle and meals, but also because you were his better half and his manager.
You tried to help him to work as best you could from afar.
,,Thank you, Jagiya,’’ Zen whispered before he imitated a kiss and fell asleep, your call still ongoing as both of you soundly breathed next to each other.
Yoosung
,,I love you, I miss you… don’t worry,“ Yoosung tried to calm you down as you kept sobbing into the phone.
You were alone at home. You were unsure because of the virus and scared that Yoosung could get sick.
The timing was simply bad and now he was in quarantine with his parents and you were on your own.
,,I read that a cat died too!“ you told him, hugging Lisa tighter as you told him your fear.
What if the cat died on you?
What if he was feeling unwell at his parents home?
,,It’s okay, Mc,“ he repeated and finally managed to calm you down.
The both of you kept chatting over the phone until, one day, it was his turn to panic.
,,Why are you coughing? Mc, did you already call the doctor? Are you okay? Did you leave?“ Yoosung whined.
,,I‘m okay, I don’t know why I got sick. Jumin made sure to help us all out,“ you whispered into the phone.
Yoosung felt guilty that he couldn’t stay at your side, but he also knew that you were strong and he promised himself to hug you tightly as soon as he could come back.
Jaehee
,,I want to come home, Jaehee…!“ you cried into the phone.
Jaehee was crying too from the other end of the line.
Tears fell on the table as she looked at her and your empty coffee shop.
The measures they had to do were hard.
For the whole world.
And you, you were in italy and her, Jaehee could do nothing to help you.
,,Children are dying here. Even teenagers who have their whole life in front of them.
Hospitals are full with deceased, mothers, fathers, oh my God…“ you told her.
Coughing harder as you kept sobbing.
Jaehee knew you.
She was married to you.
Every single habit was a sign for you.
You weren’t just scared, you were also sick.
That’s why you were actually nervous.
,,Please stay calm. I will find a way to take you back, Mc,“ your wife promised you and a few days later she really managed to make the nation bring you home.
Luckily, you just had a cold and not the coronavirus.
Saeyoung
,,Mc, you have been sick for almost three weeks,“ Saeyoung sighed as he was with you over the phone.
You heavily breathed as you listened to him.
He was worried about you.
He thought that his heart was about to burst as he thought about you.
You were at your parents house and now you were unable to leave.
You couldn’t go out.
Policemen were walking up and down the street.
You couldn’t leave with the car either.
Every single street was being looked through too.
You could neither leave or get looked at.
,,I don’t get it. I DON‘T GET IT!“ he yelled as you kept coughing.
,,I was neither with a person who had the virus or at a place where the virus was. That’s why,“ you tiredly told him.
,,I can’t anymore. I’ll go to sleep, okay Saeyoung?“ you asked him and then cut the call, not even giving him the chance to tell you good night.
It didn’t take Saeyoung long until he hacked into the government‘s system and submitted you for a test.
Indeed, you were called days afterwards and luckily tested negative for COVID-19.
Saeran
,,Don’t leave the house, yeah? I will pay a service to bring you the groceries at home,“ you told him.
You were biting your nails as you thought about your white haired boyfriend.
With his beautiful eyes, soft hands, and the voice you missed so much.
,,I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have gone with my friends to Swiss,“ you mumbled as you shook your head.
You just wanted to ski once.
And once you could realize your dream, a world wide disaster happened.
,,Just two weeks, Mc,“ Saeran chuckled.
But he was worried.
But not because of himself, but because you could have fallen sick.
,,Yeah, and then I need to get tested to make sure that I‘m not sick. I‘m scared that I could have it and give it to you,“ you confessed, playing with your nails.
,,Don’t worry,“ he said.
,,I‘m immune against you,“ he teased you, making you less nervous.
Jihyun
,,Hello, Daddy!“ Lucy happily waved into the camera as you were FaceTiming with Jihyun.
,,Hello, Lucy! Did you already finish your homework?“ Jihyun asked her, knowing that she didn’t do her homework.
,,I will finish it now and then come back, Daddy! I miss you!“ Lucy happily giggled as she sent him a kiss and disappeared into her room.
,,She still didn’t get it, did she?“ he asked you and saw you shaking your head.
,,Thank god she understands it when I say no.
But she still wants to go out with friends or play outside.
Schools are closed and they think that they have corona vacation,“ you told him.
,,Are you okay?“ you asked him.
He sadly smiled at you.
,,I am, but the people here in China aren’t.
The exhibition was called off and now we’re trapped here.
But I heard people saying that the government will pick us up….“ he told you.
You nodded and observed him.
,,Did you take the masks with you?“ you asked him.
Jihyun smiled.
,,Of course. You put them next to the table last week,“ he smiled and looked at you.
He wished he could be there with you, but for now the only possibility to see you was like that.
But it was okay as long as you guys stayed healthy.
Vanderwood
,,Don’t be scared,“ he told you.
However, these words were more to make him feel better instead of you.
,,Without you, robbers have the chance to break in,“ you mumbled sadly over the phone.
,,Oh, I hate it. Without you, I hear all possible noises,“ you told him.
He was so nervous.
,,No one will come in. Everyone is staying inside. The police are controlling the streets,“ he once again said.
His heart was beating so strongly.
At least you weren’t in danger because of the coronavirus.
,,Do you have your spray?“ he suddenly asked you.
You looked at him.
You had asthma. It was just natural that Vanderwood was worried for you.
You nodded, but quickly tried to change the topic and asked him about his mission.
A fatal mistake.
,,These assholes. The mission failed and now I‘m trapped in the middle of nowhere because the police may find me,“ Vanderwood hissed.
You smiled. You missed your boyfriend so much.
Both of you talked for the next hour until you both fell asleep and woke up together.
MASTERLIST 1
MASTERLIST 2
MASTERLIST 3
04.04.2020// 00:35 MEST
#jumin han#jumin x reader#jumin x mc#zen hyun ryu#hyun ryu#zen x reader#zen x mc#yoosung kim#yoosung x reader#yoosung x mc#jaehee kang#jaehee x mc#jaehee x reader#luciel choi#luciel x reader#luciel x mc#seven x mc#seven x reader#707 x reader#707 x mc#saeyoung choi#saeyoung x reader#saeyoung x mc#saeran choi#saeran x mc#saeran x reader#jihy#jihyun x mc#jihyun x reader#vanderwood x mc
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Title: Find You
Genre: Angst, Fluff, a ‘lil Smut
Pairing: Jinyoung x Jaebeom, minor Jinyoung x Youngjae, for 5 seconds a side of Ten x Yugyeom
Summary: Jinyoung’s kinda a dumbass. Jaebeom’s even more of a dumbass, but he’s also kind of an asshole (in the best way possible.)
Warnings: Jinyoung suxxs a dick; the smut scene is just under 600 words out of 13k
Word count: 13482
CRIS CRIS CRIS @limjaeseven I LOVE YOU!! thanks for all the stuff you do for me; i hope this can somehow repay it!! :)))))) love you broskiiiiiii lets hope for many great times~! also heres ur dumb gays :)))) <3333
I struggled with this A L O T so i hope you guys like it owo~
When Jinyoung walked out of his room and saw Jaebeom in the kitchen, that wasn’t unusual. The older one did tend to use the spare key whenever he didn’t want to cook. What was unusual, however, was the fact that Jaebeom had no shirt on.
As much as Jinyoung would like to ogle Jaebeom’s fine ass, he had more questions than wishes. “Hyung? What are you doing?” Jaebeom spun around, a sheepish smile on his face, and Jinyoung repeated the mantra, don’t look at tiddies, don’t look at tiddies over and over to himself. It’s a hard battle, and Jinyoung lost it almost immediately. Jaebeom was amused.
“My eyes are up here, Nyoungie. Not on my nipples.” Jinyoung would like the floor to swallow him up, please. “Anyways; I left my keys at home when I went to work, but I found your keys in my car. I left them in there by accident,” Jaebeom explained, laughing. “I borrowed your couch if that’s fine.”
Yes, that’s so fine. Always fine. You could even use my bed. With me still in it, of course. “Yeah, go ahead. Next time, just text me. I have your spare set of keys, remember?” Jaebeom’s mouth opened, and Jinyoung could tell he forgot.
“Yeah.” Jaebeom drew out the diphthong and smiled. “Do you want breakfast?”
“God, yes please,” Jinyoung groans. “Thanks, man. You’re a lifesaver. God, you’re literally the perfect boyfriend.”
Jaebeom offers a sheepish smile, leaning across the counter and poking Jinyoung in the cheek affectionately. “Not perfect, but I made rice pudding and toast.” He slid a plate across to Jinyoung, who thanked him gratefully. “I’ll be out of your hair then.” He started to leave when Jinyoung frowned.
“Where’s your shirt?”
Jaebeom shrugged.
“I don’t know; I think some girl at the club stole it when I spilt a drink on myself and went to wipe it off.” The older left without another word, and Jinyoung could feel his heart hurt. He forgot Jaebeom was painfully straight, and that he was painfully gay. He was once again reminded that his crush was indeed one-sided. And yes, his crush did just walk out of his door with no shirt on.
When Jinyoung used to think he was straight, he remembered feeling romantic feelings towards Jaebeom and passing it off as wanting to be best friends forever. And now that he knew for sure he’s into boys, he found out the hard way that best friends just wasn’t what he wanted to be. But that couldn’t be helped. Jaebeom would never want to be with him, and Jinyoung would just have to suffer.
Alas, he couldn’t wallow in self-pity today. His brother, Yugyeom, was flying in with his best friend BamBam, and Jinyoung had to go pick them up. He pulled on some clothes he knew would only just barely match, grabbed his keys, and headed out the door. He’s going to be early, so he would stop in a coffee shop near the airport and pick up some drinks.
The coffee shop, Ars Coffee, was busy, but not too busy that Jinyoung would be late, so he stepped in and waited in line. As he looked around the cute shop decorated in pictures of puppies and kittens, he noticed a corner of the shop that reminded him of the first time he had met Jaebeom. The older had been frantically studying and Jinyoung was hustling to find an open seat, tripping over Jaebeom’s backpack and landing in the older’s lap. The older had delivered the line, “you’re not my type, but nice ass,” and the two ended up talking until the shop closed. They exchanged numbers, and the rest was history.
However, Jinyoung was brought back to the present with an ‘ahem’ coming from behind the counter. It’s his turn to order. “Ah- yes, sorry. I’ll take a vanilla latte, an iced choco, and an iced Americano.” The barista laughed, his smile too wide for his face, and marked down the order.
“I hope all that isn’t for you. That’s a lot of sugar, not to mention caffeine.”
Jinyoung smiled back. “Who knows? I could be a college student frantically studying for last-minute exams.”
The barista, Youngjae judging by the nametag, laughed again. “The second semester just ended; you’d be on break. So I’ll just assume you’re apologising to your three girlfriends since they just found out you’ve been double- no, triple-timing them.”
“Boyfriends,” Jinyoung corrects without thinking, and then his head snapped up, eyes wide. “What I mean is- I don’t- I-”
Youngjae offered a sympathetic smile. “It’s all right. I am too,” he reassured, adding that last bit in a lowered voice. “That will be 9,321 won. Which drink is yours?”
Jinyoung fished the bills out of his back pocket, offering it to Youngjae who returned the change.
“Mine is the vanilla latte,” Jinyoung answered, stepping to the side to let the next person come forward to order, and waited patiently. After a few people from ahead of him received their drinks, he saw Youngjae prepare his three drinks, and he felt a twinge of guilt when he realised Youngjae was the only employee at the store.
When he moved to pick up the drinks, he opened his mouth to offer apologies for ordering such a long list of drinks. However, Youngjae rushed off before he even could, just to tend to another customer. Jinyoung left, and when pulling out his drink, noticed a “call me, 2-747-5143 - Choi Youngjae” messily scrawled right under the drink’s label. Cute. He input the number into his phone and took off for the airport.
He’s running late; the coffee shop took longer than he thought, and Jinyoung rushed into the terminal Yugyeom had texted him. He saw his brother, slouching as always, with BamBam, just as skinny, standing up straight next to him. At least his friend had good posture; Jinyoung had been trying to fix his brother’s bad habit for years. “Yah, Kim Yugyeom, straighten up!”
Yugyeom’s head jerked up, and a smile spread across his face. “Hyung!” The tallest bounded over, BamBam following, and enveloped Jinyoung in a tight hug. “How are you?”
Jinyoung laughed. “You act like you haven’t lived with me for twenty-four years. I’m doing well. How are you, Yugyeom, BamBam?” Yugyeom, as expected, immediately launched into a monologue about how his time in Thailand with BamBam’s family was. The fact that he didn’t really like durian was the only bit that stuck in Jinyoung’s head. But he didn’t mind; as much as he would never admit it to anyone’s face, he did miss his younger sibling. Jaebeom just didn’t fill in the gaps Yugyeom had left.
“Hyung, hyung, hyung, did you hear?” Jinyoung snapped his head toward the younger. The younger was telling him something but as mentioned, Jinyoung wasn’t really listening.
“Sorry, Gyeom, what is it?”
“Jaebeom hyung’s roommate is coming as well, you know? Jackson Wang? From when Jaebeom hyung studied in Hong Kong.” Ah. Jinyoung remembered the loud kid he met when he visited Jaebeom during their summer break three years ago. The memory that stood out the most was Jackson immediately declared himself Jinyoung’s best friend. It would be nice to see him again, Jinyoung guessed, but it’s sad Jaebeom would be spending more time with Jackson and Jinyoung instead of just Jinyoung.
Wait, what the hell was he doing?
Has he really gotten so deep into his crush that he’s trying to break off Jaebeom’s friendships? Jinyoung tonks his head on the steering wheel.
“Hyung?”
“Nothing’s wrong, I just…forgot how to drive.” Jinyoung came up with the lamest excuse, and Yugyeom stared at him for a second.
“Are you drunk?”
Instead of gracing him with an answer, Jinyoung started the car and stepped on it (as much was deemed safe).
Yugyeom cackled in his ear, and the oldest of the three aimed a slap on Yugyeom’s chest.
“There are drinks in the back for you,” Jinyoung said, and Yugyeom went for the latte. Before Jinyoung could stop him, Yugyeom noticed the message. To Jinyoung’s relief, however, the younger didn’t mention it, only raising an eyebrow and glancing at Jinyoung’s side profile.
“Hyung, how’s Jaebeom hyung doing?” BamBam broke the silence.
“Jaebeom hyung? He’s doing fine. Same old same old. Doing whatever he pleases. He went to a club yesterday and ended up half-naked on my couch and left to go who knows where and I’m definitely not suffering from an unrequited crush on him. Can’t he just not be so blatantly straight? I’m literally dying because he can’t handle not being hot every second of the day.” With each word that came out of Jinyoung’s mouth, his pitch rose.
BamBam and Yugyeom were quiet for the rest of the ride, and Jinyoung refrained from jumping out of the car lest they would crash. They finally pulled up to the building, and BamBam left the tense atmosphere as quickly as he could. Yugyeom ready to leave, turned to Jinyoung, opened and closed his mouth as if deciding on what to say. “Hyung…maybe you should go on that date.” With that final sentence, Yugyeom exits as well, leaving Jinyoung in the car to ponder over when his life suddenly turned into such a mess.
After concluding his life became a mess once he was born, Jinyoung headed inside to find Yugyeom and BamBam had already made themselves at home and were currently trying to set up the ancient Wii.
“Have you two unpacked already? That was fast.” Jinyoung commented, unimpressed, and Yugyeom looked up at him.
“Yeah, we unpacked…”
“…the Wii.” BamBam finished Yugyeom’s answer and Jinyoung raised an eyebrow, unimpressed.
“Go unpack and then play Wii. I don’t want to trip over any of your bags.” Yugyeom groaned but got up obediently and BamBam followed like a good friend. Once they disappeared from sight, Jinyoung headed into his own room, with the coffee cup from Ars.
Jinyoung plopped down on his bed and opened the contacts on his phone. He stares at the number on the cup. After a moment of deliberation, he inputs it into his phone, saving the contact as ‘Ars - Choi Youngjae” and stares at the empty profile before finally tapping on “message.” He waited again, then sighed, throwing his phone onto the bed and leaving to get something to eat. Youngjae was still probably working and Jinyoung didn’t want to bother him.
Once Yugyeom and BamBam finished unpacking, they, predictably, connected the Wii and coerced (read: threatened) Jinyoung to join them in a Mario Kart championship.
In the middle of Rainbow Road, the door unlocked, and Jinyoung forfeited Yoshi to answer the door. Jaebeom and Jackson stood behind the door, and Jinyoung paused for a minute before letting them in. “Jackson! It’s good to see you again. How have you been?”
Jackson grinned, slapping Jinyoung on the back.
“Hey, Park Gae!” God, Jinyoung forgot about the cute nickname Jackson gave him back in Hong Kong. Jackson waited expectantly, and Jinyoung sighed.
“Sorry. Wang Gae, it’s good to see you again. How have you been?” Jinyoung complied.
“I’m doing well; I’ve actually recently gotten a job here teaching fencing, so I’ll be seeing you guys more often!” Oh. Jinyoung didn’t think Jackson would be staying for that long.
“Hyungs!” Yugyeom finally got up from the couch, having beaten BamBam by a hair and Jinyoung by a mile. Jaebeom grinned endearingly as always, hooking an arm around Yugyeom’s neck and ruffling his hair. “Jaebeom hyung, don’t mess up my hair!”
“What, are you trying to impress the ladies?” Jaebeom teased, and Jinyoung stiffened slightly.
“Yugyeom, have you been trying to impress any ladies-“
Jinyoung started to narrow his eyes, and Yugyeom squawked, pulling himself out of Jaebeom’s grip.
“What- No!” Glancing at Jinyoung’s unwavering glare, Yugyeom immediately looked away and up.
“Kim Yugyeom.”
“Really! Seriously, hyung, no way! No girls.” Yugyeom whined. “I haven’t!” He emphasized the last word.
“No girls?” Jaebeom took this opportunity to tease him further. “What about guys? Any hot men in Thailand who caught your interest?”
Yugyeom glanced back at BamBam, and Jinyoung caught the sly movement.
“There are?” Jinyoung almost screamed, feeling like he might die. His baby brother? Having a crush? Unheard of. Yugyeom had always put dancing first, rejecting everyone. “Who? I must protect my baby brother from them!”
Jackson laughed. “Protect him from them? More like the other way around-“ Yugyeom smacked Jackson on the back.
“Hyung!” The fake tension was eased, and Jinyoung grinned at his brother, ready as always to tease.
“So? Who is it? Do I know him?”
“Well-“ Yugyeom started, and Jinyoung’s jaw dropped. “Not yet.”
“What do you mean not yet?” Jinyoung frowns.
“He’s coming to Korea next week to study dance like I am. You’ll meet him then! Ten hyung is a year older, and BamBam knows him.” The Thai friend nodded.
“He’s a year older? Yugyeom, you’re into older men?” Jaebeom gasped in mock shock, and Yugyeom cackled, shoving the older lightly.
“Hyung, what the hell? He’s only a year older, not like Jinyoung and his young barista love.” Eyes turned to Jinyoung, who immediately began to smack Yugyeom.
“Kim Yugyeom-“
“What’s this about your young barista love?” Jackson was immediately interested.
“He’s not- I’m- How do you know he’s young?” Jinyoung stammered out.
Yugyeom cackled. “Choi Youngjae from Ars Coffee Shop? He tutors me in piano. He’s two years younger than you.” Jinyoung’s mouth dropped open.
God, this was mortifying. Jaebeom’s laughter brought him out of his funk, however. The older man (only by six months, Jackson liked to stress) slapped Jinyoung on the back. “Good for you, Nyoung! You’re finally going for your mans!”
Jinyoung choked something akin to ‘God, I hate you all’ and Yugyeom cackled at his older brother’s misery. However, he noticed Jinyoung’s pained look, and Jaebeom’s hand on his brother’s back, and quieted. “Jaebeom hyung,” the youngest called, “can you play Mario Kart with me? Jinyoung hyung sucks, and I beat BamBam. I wanna play you since you’re basically a grandpa.”
Jaebeom fell for the bait, hook line and sinker, glowering and grabbing the remote BamBam handed him. “All right, brat. Let’s go.”
Jinyoung almost heaved a breath of release and moved to the kitchen to get some water. BamBam followed him, and Jackson sat to watch Yugyeom and Jaebeom compete.
“Hyung-“ BamBam hissed, and Jinyoung tried to ignore him. But BamBam was nothing but persistent. “Hyung, why do you do this to yourself? It’s only hurting you, and in the long run, hurting Jaebeom hyung. This can only end up in two ways. Either you draw away from hyung when it gets too much, and both you and Jaebeom hyung get hurt; you both lose a good friend. Or you don’t and Jaebeom hyung finds out on his own. He’s going to feel bad, Jinyoung hyung. Guilty; he’s going to hate himself. You need to stop this.”
“You think I don’t know?” Jinyoung almost yelled but restrained himself. “God, BamBam, I love him, yes, but he’s also my best friend. I don’t want to just tell him, ‘Hey, I have a crush on you, I need you to never talk to me’, that will just make him sad as well. My best bet is to go out with Youngjae and try to forget.”
BamBam frowned. “Hyung, if you don’t then Youngjae-ssi will get hurt too.” Jinyoung sighed, dropping his head onto the counter. “You don’t have to leave him forever.”
“I know. But it’s not something I want to do. Call me jealous-”
“Am I interrupting something?” Jinyoung turned his head to face Jackson, standing in the kitchen doorway awkwardly. BamBam looked at Jinyoung, who shrugged.
“Might as well tell him, Bam,” Jinyoung sighed. “It’s pointless to hide it.”
Jackson was still confused and Jinyoung was still moping, so BamBam took it upon himself to save them from their misery. Or at least, just explain. After doing so, Jackson’s mouth is agape. “Damn, are you living in a k-drama or something? That’s insane, man.”
Jinyoung almost rolled his eyes, but he’s too tired to do so. Instead, he just got up, drank a glass of water, and smiled tightly at Jackson. “Yeah. I think I’ll go to bed early. Eat whatever, or order something. Don’t let Yugyeom cook.”
As he trudged back into his room, Jaebeom, having just been defeated by Yugyeom, glanced up and saw his best friend leave. “Yugyeom, play against Jackson, okay? I need to ask Jinyoung something. Sounds good?” Yugyeom nodded, engrossed in the game, and Jackson came to play for Jaebeom.
“Jinyoungie, I’m coming in, all right?” Jaebeom knocked gently on his best friend’s door, and he can hear a muffled groan. Jaebeom opened the door and saw Jinyoung lying face down in the bed. “Jinyoungie, what’s wrong?”
“Nuthin’,” Jinyoung mumbled, turning his head off the pillow and away from the door.
“That doesn’t look like nothing, Jinyoung.” The older sighed, stepping forward and sitting in Jinyoung’s desk chair. “Is something the matter?”
Jinyoung didn’t respond, and just pulled a blanket over his head and rolled over some more, enough to wrap himself up like a mummy. Jaebeom sighed again, shifting the chair closer until he’s almost right next to the bed. Jinyoung didn’t move, so Jaebeom reached out and smoothed Jinyoung’s hair. “Hyung-”
Jaebeom’s heart leaps into his chest. He had never heard Jinyoung sound so pitiful ever since the younger had broken his knee cap in middle school. “Jinyoung? What’s wrong?”
“Hyung, I think maybe you should leave me alone.”
With those words, Jaebeom’s heart dropped. Never had he thought he would ever hear Jinyoung say that. Through thick and thin, the two had always stuck together. It was just two years ago Jaebeom found Jinyoung crying alone in his closet and seeing Jinyoung like this again made Jaebeom hurt. He ignores Jinyoung, moving to sit on the bed instead, and wraps an arm around Jinyoung. “Nyoung, I won’t make you talk to me, all right? But I don’t want to leave you alone, and I’ll sit and stay in here. I don’t want you to hurt alone.”
He lay beside Jinyoung, enveloping the younger in his arms, blanket burrito and all, and listened to Jinyoung’s breathing heightened…and then fell as the younger fell asleep.
As much as it hurt Jaebeom to see his best friend like this, he didn’t know what he did hurt Jinyoung more.
When Jinyoung woke, he knew Jaebeom was still there, feeling the older’s arms caressing his arms subconsciously. God, why is Jaebeom like this? Nice one minute and then the next running out the door to meet some girls.
He carefully slid out from between Jaebeom’s arms and adjusted the sheets to cover Jaebeom. As he tiptoed out of his room, he came face to face with Yugyeom, wringing his hands. “Gyeom?” he whispered, “What is it?”
“Hyung-“ Yugyeom was obviously distressed. Jinyoung reached up to brush his bangs out of hair. “ hyung, are you mad at me?”
“Mad? Why would I be mad, baby?”
“I’m gay.“ Jinyoung almost laughed, if not for the look on Yugyeom’s face.
“Baby, I’d never be mad. Look at me and my gayness. Why on Earth would I be mad?” Yugyeom shrugged, still obviously worried. “The only thing I’m unhappy about is the fact you didn’t tell me. But not at you, Gyeom-ah. I’m just worried I failed something as your brother.”
Yugyeom shook his head. “No, hyung. Of course not. You’re the best big brother I could wish for.”
Jinyoung laughed. “Maybe you should get upset more often. I could get used to hearing that.” Yugyeom finally smiled, shoving his brother lightly.
“Hyung, don’t be a dumbass. Come on, let’s eat.” Jinyoung’s mouth dropped open in fake annoyance.
“Yah, respect your elders. Brat.” Jinyoung patted his pockets, before realizing he accidentally left his phone inside the room. He almost groaned audibly, before turning around and opening the door as quietly as he could.
However, that was unnecessary as Jaebeom had already woken, and was seated on the bed and rubbing his eyes. “Hey, hyung,” Jinyoung greeted him almost casually but got the words out slightly too fast.
“Jinyoung, you know you can always talk to me, right?” God, Jinyoung did not want to get into this talk.
“Hyung, I know. I just don’t want to talk about it right now,” Jinyoung sighed. “Maybe one of these days I will, but not right now. Have you seen my phone?”
Jaebeom, knowing that the conversation was over, nodded. “Yeah, it’s on the bed. You were sleeping on top of it.” Jaebeom grabbed it, but before handing it to Jinyoung, smirked. “I texted Youngjae for you.”
“You what?” Jinyoung narrowed his eyes. “Hyung, come on. I was going to get to it.” Jaebeom frowned.
“Really? I distinctly remember multiple times you almost failed a class because you “going to get back to your superiors,” Jinyoung.”
“Hyung, seriously. Maybe school was something, but this is my own business. Stop poking your nose into it. I’ll text Youngjae if I want to, and if I forget, I forget.” Jinyoung rolled his eyes, and Jaebeom’s temper flared.
“Yah, respect your elders, Park Jinyoung. I just wanted you to get out and talk to people. All you do is stay in here all day or work.”
“I’ll respect you once you respect my personal affairs, Jaebeom. And are you saying I’m not exciting because I like to stay inside? Jaebeom, come on. Don’t be daft.”
“I’m just saying-” Jaebeom raised his hands in mock surrender “-going out is fun. It’s an experience.”
“Im Jaebeom, just because you sleep around like a whore-“ Jinyoung slapped his mouth closed, eyes widening, and Jaebeom got up. He was mad. “Hyung, I didn’t mean it.” Jaebeom ignored him, brushing past Jinyoung’s shoulder and leaving the room immediately. Jinyoung sank down onto the floor and almost curses.
He lay there for who knows how long, or at least until his stomach growled, and BamBam pokes his head in. “Jinyoung hyung, are you all right? Jaebeom left in a huff thirty minutes ago and Jackson followed him. What happened?”
“I called him a whore, BamBam. I’m so stupid.” Jinyoung whined, slapping himself. “God, I’m such a dumbass.”
BamBam sighed. “Hyung, what did Jaebeom do? You don’t usually get this angry.”
“It wasn’t his fault-“ Jinyoung tried to defend, but BamBam shook his head.
“It was your own fault you said that, but he must have provoked you.” Jinyoung just groaned, patting the space next to him and BamBam joined him as the older man explained.
Sometime in the middle, Yugyeom joined in and Jinyoung had to explain all over again, getting almost choked up. “Hyung, I think you both were in the wrong. Jaebeom should have let you do your own thing. He’s not that much older than you, and even if he was, you’re an adult,” Yugyeom said.
“When did you two get so wise?” Jinyoung laughed wetly.
BamBam cackled, loud and clear as day. “We’re only wise when it comes to someone else’s affairs. Ours? Not so much. You should’ve seen Yugyeom flail in front of Ten hyung.”
Jinyoung’s eyebrow rose sky-high. “That’s right. Yugyeom, what is this…Ten like?”
The tips of Yugyeom’s ears turned red. “Ten hyung? He’s great. He’s loud and friendly. He likes cats, and he doesn’t like fruit.”
“He doesn’t like what now?”
“Fruit. I don’t know why, but it’s cute,” Yugyeom grinned to himself and BamBam gagged, causing the youngest to reach across Jinyoung and smack his best friend. “But enough about Ten hyung, what did Jaebeom hyung say to Youngjae hyung?”
Jinyoung shrugged. “I don’t know. I didn’t really look.” Yugyeom leaned over and grabbed the phone.
“Well, let’s check.”
Jinyoung grabbed the phone after a moment of hesitation and unlocked it. (The password was Jaebeom’s birthday but no one needs to know that.) The text, glaringly bright, just said a simple ‘Hey, how r u’ and there’s a moment of silence before Yugyeom burst out laughing.
“Jaebeom hyung thinks he’s slick but he’s just as bad at texting as you,” Yugyeom teases.
“Nah, at least Jaebeom hyung uses slang. Jinyoung hyung sounds like he’s texting a business partner.” Jinyoung smacked both of them, eliciting a few more laughs when Yugyeom gasped.
“Hyung, he’s texting you back-” Jinyoung’s head snaps to the phone where lo, and behold, Youngjae had just responded with a ‘hey, im good, how r u?’
At the prodding of the two youngest, Jinyoung replied, and he and Youngjae ended up starting a conversation. Yugyeom and BamBam exchanged looks before quietly leaving Jinyoung with his new beau.
‘What are u up to?’
‘Not much, I’m just lying down. How about you?’
‘LOL ur so formal. And you asked that already. But Im doing the same haha’
‘Sounds fun. I’m sure we are very exciting.’
‘How’s life?’
‘Boring. How’s yours?’
God, Jinyonug could feel the awkwardness oozing from his texts, and he resisted the urge to smack himself. Before he could, his phone rang, Youngjae was calling him. Jinyoung almost dropped the phone, but answered it quickly, pressing the phone to his ear.
“I think it’d be less awkward if we talked on the phone, yeah?” Youngjae’s bright voice sounded, not dulling even through the phone.
“Yeah, that might be best,” Jinyoung laughed. “How was work? It wasn’t too busy, I hope.”
“No, not at all.” A moment of silence when- “Hey, are you busy today?”
Jinyoung’s heart picked up. “No, not at all. Are you?’
“No.”
More silence, when Youngjae burst out laughing, and by default, so did Jinyoung. Who could resist laughing after Youngjae does, after all? “God, we’re embarrassing,” Jinyoung choked out through giggles.
“No, I think it’s all you. You just enable my awkward ability,” Youngjae teased. “But seriously, do you want to hang out today? I’m done tutoring.”
Tutoring reminded Jinyoung. “Yeah, that sounds good! Speaking of tutoring, I’ve heard you tutor my younger brother, Kim Yugyeom?”
“Wait, seriously? Kim Yugyeom is your brother?” Youngjae sounded flabbergasted and Jinyoung laughed once more.
“Yeah. I took our father’s last name and Yugyeom took our mother’s.”
“That’s neat. Yugyeom is such a cute kid, and he learns well.”
“Yeah, but he’s a brat.” The two of them snicker, and Jinyoung can hear Yugyeom sneeze twice.
“But seriously, do you want to meet up?” Jinyoung nodded, but then realised he’s stupid.
“Ah, yeah. Sure! When and where?”
“Does lunch at Ars Coffee work? I have a worker’s discount...and I own the place so the discount is not needed.” Jinyoung snorted.
“Wow, successful and handsome. I sure hit the jackpot. That sounds good.”
“Oh, haha, very funny. I’ll see you at noon.” Youngjae hung up, and Jinyoung stared at his phone for a few minutes, a stupid grin on his face.
God, he’s excited. He’s probably a little too excited. God, he can’t wait to tell Jaebeom. Jinyoung is brought back down from his emotional high as fast as Yugyeom buying an ice choco. Should he text Jaebeom or let the older cool down? Why did he have to run his mouth? Jaebeom was just trying to help and Jinyoung ruined it.
Unfortunately, today is still not a good day to wallow, Jinyoung has to get ready for his date. Date? Is it a date? Dear LORD Jinyoung’s going on a date. Jaebeom be damned (and thanked), he was a bit overeager and ran straight into the doorframe. “Hyung?” Yugyeom poked his head around the hallway corner. “Everything all right?”
Jinyoung beams. “I have a date.” Yugyeom snickers at Jinyoung’s face.
“God, hyung, you look stupid. But congratulations.” Jinyoung suddenly wiped the smile off his face, straightening up and sending the fear of God into Yugyeom’s heart.
“Kim Yugyeom, I may be going on a date with undeniably the cutest man to exist. But I am still your older brother and will not hesitate to kill you.”
Yugyeom cackled and ran into his room with BamBam, locking the door, and Jinyoung rolled his eyes. When his beloved “Ten hyung” comes around, he’ll have to answer to Jinyoung if he ever hurts Yugyeom.
But look at the time; Jinyoung needed to eat and change if he wanted to be at Ars Coffee at noon. Cereal is the fastest option, but BamBam finished the last of that (damn his sweet tooth), so Jinyoung just got a piece of bread and toasted it. He’s excited about his first date, he’s allowed to rush. By the time he had to leave, he had already tried on five different outfits, deciding on a simple black turtleneck and jeans. “I’m heading out, you two. Don’t cause trouble.”
“Get that dick, hyung!” Jinyoung heard Yugyeom and BamBam chorus from in their room, making a mental note to kill them later. But for now, he had a date he needed to go on.
Due to his excitement, he ended up arriving thirty minutes early, and Jinyoung just ordered and waited. Youngjae came barrelling in twenty minutes later, all smiley and Jinyoung could feel his heart melt. “Jinyoung! Hi!” Youngjae slid in across from him. “I heard you arrived really early; the co-owner and my friend told me.”
Jinyoung laughed, trying to cover up his embarrassment. “Damn, if I ever need to commit some shady business, remind me not to do it here. Your co-workers will just snitch on me.” Youngjae guffawed, the sound echoing in the shop.
“Don’t worry, I’ll vouch for you.” Jinyoung laughs as well.
“Thanks, I’m glad I now have a confidant for all my misadventures,” Jinyoung says, poking Youngjae’s arm.
“How many misadventures have you been getting into?” Youngjae raises a brow. “Last time we met, you were three-timing your boyfriends.” Jinyoung snorts.
“Oh, you have no idea. I rob banks and kill my best friends all the time.” Youngjae laughs once more, and Jinyoung could hear it all day, every day.
"You sound like someone my mother would warn me against," Youngjae teases. "I should stay away from you if I want to keep my reputation up."
Jinyoung chuckles. "Well, what's the fun in that?" He leans across the table slightly. "I say damn your reputation, let's go murder someone."
"I don't think that would fly over very well with my friend Mark, but alright. Tomorrow at seven? Who should we start with?"
Jinyoung snorts, all the possibilities going through his head. "Jaebeom," he says without thinking, and almost takes it back. But Youngjae doesn't know the argument; so he'll live with it.
"Who's that?" Youngjae cocks his head and Jinyoung resists the urge to coo.
“He’s my best friend.” Thankfully Jinyoung’s voice didn’t waver. “Everyone has the moment where you want to kill your best friend, surely.”
“No, I am an angel, couldn’t you tell?” Youngjae teased, and Jinyoung refrained from saying ‘yes.’ He liked Youngjae already; they have a lot in common and Jinyoung forgot all about the ordeal with Jaebeom as he spends time with the younger.
However, his glee was soon cut short when he arrived home and he saw Jaebeom’s shoes kicked off to the side. “Yugyeom-ah, is Jaebeom hyung here?” he asked the younger on the couch. Yugyeom looked up, shock registered on his face.
“Hyung, you weren’t supposed to be home ’til later,” Yugyeom stammered, and Jinyoung furrowed his eyebrows, a frown tugging at the corner of his lips.
“Kim Yugyeom, what is going on?” Jinyoung dropped his book bag onto the floor. “I don’t like it when you lie to me, you know this-“
“Jinyoung, it’s not Yugyeom’s fault.” Jinyoung’s head whipped around, Jaebeom having spoken from around the corner of the kitchen.
“Hyung, what are you doing here?” Jinyoung left Yugyeom on the couch and entered the kitchen, seeing Jaebeom cooking…something. “Well, never mind that, hyung. I guess since you’re here, I should apologise for earlier this morning. What I said was out of line and-“
Jaebeom waved him off. “No, just forget it, Jinyoung. We were both at fault. Let’s just put it behind us, hm? We can’t not be best friends over such a petty fight, right?”
“Yeah, best friends,” Jinyoung chuckled almost lifelessly. Time to shove yet another problem under the carpet. “What are you doing here anyway?”
“What, can’t I visit my best friend?” After a moment of silence, Jaebeom sighed, giving in. “I need to learn how to cook Italian dishes. I invited this girl over for dinner next week, and I want to impress her.”
“Can’t you order Italian takeout?” Jaebeom snorted.
“Takeout can’t cut it.”
“Have you forgotten the Great Noodle Incident, hyung? I don’t think I want you cooking weird recipes in my kitchen.” Jaebeom looked up from the pot to glare at Jinyoung.
“Wasn’t that your idea, Nyoung?”
“Well, I think it’s time for me to go. I’m a little tired, you know?” Jinyoung tried to make his escape, but Jaebeom is nothing if not petty.
“No, no, Jinyoung, please refresh my memory. How did the Great Noodle Incident start?” Jinyoung opened his mouth, closed it, and opened it again, before he was saved by the doorbell.
When he enters the living room to answer it, it appears Yugyeom had already opened the door to whoever it is standing outside. “Youngjae ah? What are you doing here?” Jinyoung blinked once, twice, thrice.
“Ah, you just forgot your phone at Ars.” Youngjae held up the device. “I texted Yugyeom for your address; I didn’t know he lives here too.”
“Oh, thanks.” Jinyoung smiled, walking over and taking his phone. “I appreciate it, Youngjae. Would you like to come in for a little? Jaebeom is here and you could meet him.”
Youngjae steps forward a bit. “I mean, I don’t want to intrude, but I would love to meet our murder victim once.” Jinyougn laughed out loud, covering his mouth again.
“That’s right. He’s in the kitchen, cooking who knows what. Maybe you could help him out; you work in the coffee shop so you’re bound to be a better cook.” Youngjae laughed.
“I only know how to make pastries, really, but I could try. What is he attempting?” Jinyoung shrugged.
“Some weird Italian recipe, and I don’t want the apartment burnt down.” Jinyoung led Youngjae to the kitchen, gesturing towards Jaebeom. “Youngjae, Jaebeom. Jaebeom, Youngjae.”
Jaebeom turned around, beaming and bowing. “It’s nice to meet you, Youngjae. I’m glad Jinyoung finally got out of his shell and met someone. Lord knows how long I’ve been trying to get him to go on a date.”
Yeah, cus I want to date you. “Well, how does it feel to have Jinyoung ssi finally go on a date then?” Youngjae saved Jinyoung from his thoughts, and Jinyoung poked Youngjae in the side for the comment.
Jaebeom snorted, slapping Jinyoung on the back. “God, I’m so relieved. I definitely would have thought this kid would become an old miserly man who yells at kids.”
“You are only seven months older than me, hyung. Don’t call me kid,” Jinyoung snapped playfully.
Jaebeom gasped. “Now, where has this attitude come from? Don’t talk back to your elders…kid.” It’s Jinyoung’s turn to chuckle.
“God, you’re so annoying.” Jinyoung turned to Youngjae. “See why I chose him as my first murder victim?”
“I don’t know…I think I like him,” Youngjae teased, and Jinyoung pouted.
“I’m so hurt. I’ve been betrayed,” he cried out, “Yugyeom, you’re the only one I love.”
“Ew, hyung, go away,” called Yugyeom from the other room, and the apartment was filled with laughter. God, Jinyoung was beyond happy Youngjae and Jaebeom are getting along. The two seemed to enjoy each other’s company, Youngjae coming around the counter to read the recipe Jaebeom had left out.
Jinyoung left the kitchen for a little, coming to sit by Yugyeom, who was watching a drama on his phone. “Yugyeom, why weren’t you going to tell me Jaebeom was here?”
Yugyeom didn’t look up from his drama, answering with a, “I thought he would be gone by the time you came back. I didn’t want you two to argue again. You know, hyung is my friend too, but I don’t want to see you hurt.”
Jinyoung sighs. “I know. I’ll try not to argue with him too much.”
“I’m not talking about that, hyung,” Yugyeom said, finally pausing his drama to look at his older brother, only this time Jinyoung avoided Yugyeom’s eyes. “Hyung, come on.”
“Yugyeom, where’s BamBam?” Jinyoung tried to change the subject, but Yugyeom was having none of that.
“He’s getting picked up from work by Jackson. Don’t dodge the situation.” Jinyoung still avoided Yugyeom’s eyes.
“I know. But we have guests, and I don’t want to deal with this just yet.”
“Deal with what?” Youngjae had just come around the corner, having finished with Jaebeom.
“My friend is coming over next week, and Jinyoung hyung doesn’t want to meet him since he thinks I’m going to elope or something,” Yugyeom lied smoothly. Jinyoung resisted the urge to kick him for that comment in thankfulness.
“Ooh, your boyfriend?” Yugyeom choked at Youngjae’s comment.
“No! Ten hyung is just a friend.”
“For now-” Jinyougn snorted, and Yugyeom whined.
“Hyung, seriously. You’re so annoying.” Jinyoung laughed at that, ruffling the younger’s hair.
“I’m just kidding, Yugyeom,” he laughed, and turned to Youngjae. “Are you leaving already?” Youngjae nodded sheepishly.
“Yeah, I have to get back to Ars; Mark co-owns the place with me and his shift is almost over.” Youngjae paused briefly, eyes flicking down to Jinyoung’s lips. Jinyoung catches the sly movement and smiles.
“Here, I’ll walk you down to your car.” Youngjae agreed readily, and the two exited the apartment to the sound of Yugyeom gagging really loudly. Jinyoung swore he’s going to kill Yugyeom one of these days. But not right now.
Right now, Jinyoung was focusing on how he and Youngjae are alone in the elevator, and how the younger keeps glancing at his lips. “Hyung-” Youngjae started to speak, and Jinyoung snapped his head to look at him. “Er- I like Jaebeom and Yugyeom. They’re very nice.”
Jinyoung beamed. “I’m glad I know them. As much as they annoy me, they are good friends.”
The silence became deafening again, and lasted until Youngjae and Jinyoung were standing in front of the younger’s car. “Hyung, thanks for letting me hang out for a little,” Youngjae said, and before Jinyoung could react, leant forward and pressed a kiss to the older’s lips before getting in his car and waving.
Jinyoung barely had the mind to wave back before Youngjae started the car and left. He remained in his daze all the way back up to his apartment, where Yugyeom finally had the sense to leave Jinyoung alone and let his brother go into his room without a hitch. Jaebeom, however, isn’t as kind, leaving Yugyeom with instructions on when to take whatever food he’s made out of the oven.
“So, Jinyoungie-ya! How did your date go?” Jaebeom rested against the bedroom door frame, grinning wide like the Cheshire Cat. God, Jinyoung would kiss the smirk off Jaebeom’s face if he could. Unfortunately, for one, he’s on his bed and wrapped up in blankets. And second, Jaebeom might punch him.
Jinyoung frowned with no spite. “It was good, hyung. I really like Youngjae. I’m glad I met him.” Jaebeom nodded once, twice.
“That’s…good. I’m glad, Jinyoungie. You deserve someone in your life.” Jaebeom smiled, but Jinyoung can feel something off about it. He pushes the feeling to the side; Jaebeom was probably still a little upset about the argument earlier.
“Hyung, come here,” Jinyougn smiled lightly, lifting up the blankets, and Jaebeom laughed, walking forward and cuddling up with Jinyoung.
“I forgot you’re so clingy sometimes,” Jaebeom teased, and Jinyoung snoted, kicking Jaebeom lightly in the shin.
“Don’t be mean, hyung,” Jinyonug whined and Jaebeom laughed again, wrapping his arm around Jinyoung’s waist. The younger could feel his heartstrings tugging, but he ignored the feeling, as he’s done all those years. “Hyung?”
“Yes, Nyongie?” Jaebeom was sleepy, and Jinyonug couldn’t blame him. He spent all this time cooking, and paired with the argument this morning, Jinyoung could understand why he’s tired.
“I love you,” Jinyoung whispered, and Jaebeom just groaned, pressing his cheek into Jinyoung.
“Love you too, Nyoung,” he mumbled out a reply before cuddling even closer, and Jinyoung almost cried. Thankfully, he didn’t (how embarrassing would that be) and instead fell asleep against his friend for the second time that day.
They’re woken up an hour later by Jackson, who had returned with BamBam and three cartons of ice-cream and the promise of a movie night. Well, Jinyoung wasn’t going to protest, especially since he didn’t have to pay for either dinner or the ice-cream.
Unfortunately, Jackson chose the movie, and as expected, it was an Iron Man movie. Jinyoung doesn’t know which one; he’s given up on paying attention. Instead, he’s crowded in between Jackson and Jaebeom, the former’s hand slightly uncomfortably high up on Jinyoung’s thigh. Jaebeom looked at the hand on Jinyoung’s thigh unhappily, wrapping his arm around Jinyoung again.
God, it was almost domestic, and Jinyoung could feel the warmth of his crush rise again. Why did he do this? He liked Youngjae; why did Jaebeom have to do this to him?
Jinyoung was suffocating, he couldn't handle this contact. He stood up abruptly, Jaebeom looking up with his eyebrows furrowed and Jackson frowning slightly. Yugyeom stayed silent, as did BamBam.
“Jinyoung-ah, are you all right?” Jackson speaks first. Jinyoung looked at him, eyes wide like a deer caught in the headlights.
“I don’t know,” he answered honestly. “I don’t know.”
At that, Yugyeom stood up, guiding him away from the group. “Hyung, go get a glass of water and go lie down in your room, all right?” Jinyoung nodded blankly, leaving, and as Jaebeom made to stand up, Yugyeom stopped him. “Jaebeom hyung, I don’t think you should go with him. Just enjoy the movie with Jackson hyung, all right?”
Jaebeom glared, but Yugyeom stood firm, and Jaebeom didn’t want to go against the wishes of Jinyoung’s younger brother and so he relented.
Yugyeom found Jinyoung in his room, as he was told, sitting against the bed on the floor and clutching the water in both hands. Yugyeom sighed at his brother’s obviously distressed state. “Hyung, drink the water. Holding it isn’t going to help,” he tried to joke, but it fell flat.
Jinyoung lifted the cup to his lips, taking small sips and Yugyeom sat next to him. “Yugyeom, why did this have to happen to me?” Jinyoung asked solemnly, and the brothers sighed in unison.
“Hyung, I think maybe you should take time off from seeing Jaebeom hyung. It’s doing nothing but hurting you.” Jinyoung finished his cup of water, and Yugyeom took it, putting it on the desk.
“Yugyeomie, I can’t.” Jinyoung’s plea almost broke Yugyeom’s heart. “He’s first and foremost my best friend.” Yugyeom tentatively wrapped his arms around Jinyoung, pulling his older brother into a tight hug, and Jinyoung choked out a sob.
“Hyung, I’ll handle it with Jaebeom, all right? I’m sure he just wants you to be happy.” Jinyoung didn’t respond, crying silently into Yugyeom’s chest.
Sooner or later, Jinyougn was too exhausted, and fell asleep in Yugyeom’s arms, the third time today. Yugyeom didn’t move, too worried to wake up the older, and Jaebeom quietly opened the door and poked his head in.
“Is he doing all right?” Jaebeom walked in further, leaning down and brushing a piece of hair out of Jinyoung’s mouth.
Yugyeom sighed, looking up at Jaebeom. “Hyung, I don’t think he can see you and Jackson any more.” Jaebeom’s eyes widened.
“What do you mean?”
“Hyung, it’s not like that,” Yugyeom added hastily. “I just think that he’s been overstressed with work and making sure you and Jackson don’t notice. I’m forcing him to take a few days off. BamBam has to stay since he doesn’t have a place to stay, but I want Jinyoung to indulge in what he wants. Haven’t you noticed he started rejecting you subconsciously?”
Jaebeom’s frown deepened, but he made no comment. Of course he’s noticed the way Jinyoung flinches when Jaebeom initiates physical contact, the way he avoids Jaebeom’s eyes. “I just don’t want Jinyoung by himself.”
“He won’t be alone, hyung. I promise. I’ll keep an eye on him, and so will BamBam.” Yugyeom reassured, and Jaebeom backed off. Yugyeom knows what he’s doing, Jaebeom reminds himself.
“All right. Jackson and I will be going then. Make sure Jinyoung feels better soon, all right? Can’t have my best friend die on me.” Yugyeom nodded and Jaebeom finally left.
Yugyeom stayed in Jinyoung’s room for the rest of the night, lifting Jinyoung into his bed and curling up next to him. At some point, BamBam had joined the cuddle party, and when Jinyoung awakened, he didn’t want to leave. He didn’t for a long while, but the cuddle party overheated him, so he wriggled his way out of Yugyeom’s arms carefully.
As he made his way into the kitchen, his phone buzzed, and looking at it, Jinyoung noticed Youngjae had texted him, asking him if he wanted to come over today. ‘Mark is at a friend’s for the whole day so we could hang out and watch movies or something’ the text read, and Jinyoung’s heart leapt into his throat.
He responded quickly, agreeing readily, and asked for a time. Youngjae responded just as fast, offering five in the evening, and Jinyoung accepted. He poked his head into his room to see Yugyeom and BamBam still asleep, curled around each other.
He didn’t want to wake them up; it must have been the jet lag getting to them, so Jinyoung let them sleep in. They looked so peaceful anyway; Jinyoung would’ve felt bad if he woke them. But when he tried to exit the room, the buzz of his phone alerting him to a new text alerted BamBam as well. “Hyung?” the Thai man groggily opened his eyes. “Good morning.”
Jinyoung threw him a smile. “Morning, Bam,” he responded, keeping his voice low. “Did you have a good night?”
BamBam sat up, Yugyeom’s head on his chest falling to his lap. “Yeah. Hyung, are you doing all right?” Jinyoung shrugged.
“As good as I can do now. Don’t wake up Yugyeom, all right?” BamBam nodded, looking down at the youngest in his lap. “I’ll be going out later on this evening to see Youngjae.”
BamBam wriggled his eyebrows, and Jinyoung restrained himself from hitting his brother’s friend. “Get that ass, Jinyoung.”
“If anything, Youngjae will get this ass,” Jinyoung stated smoothly, and before BamBam could recover from his shock, exited the room smoothly.
As he glanced down at his phone, three missed calls from an unknown number were there, and Jinyougn frowned, swiping the notifications away. It was probably a telemarketer; Jinyoung had been getting a lot of those calls recently. No big deal, Jinyoung just blocked the number without a hitch.
Breakfast is more important than weird phone calls, anyway. He can’t cook to save his life, but Jinyoung does know Jaebeom kept leftovers from yesterday in the fridge. He’s still unsure whether he likes the ziti, or whatever Jaebeom made, but it’s food.
He popped a plate of ziti into the microwave, keeping an eye on the timer to stop it before it beeped and woke up Yugyeom. But he didn’t need to; Yugyeom had awoken and was coming around the corner. “Hyung, why didn’t you wake me up?”
Jinyoung shrugged. “You looked so peaceful. I didn’t want to wake you up.” This was apparently the wrong thing to say, Yugyeom smirked.
“Aw, is my big bro being soft for his favorite brother?” Jinyoung swiped at Yugyeom, who dodged easily.
“Brat.”
Yugyeom cackled at his older brother’s misery, a regular occurence in this household. Jinyoung did his best to ignore him, instead sending a few cat pictures to Jaebeom. Surprisingly, the older didn’t respond right away, but Jinyoung shrugged it off, pinning it down to Jaebeom probably forgetting to charge his phone again.
BamBam needed yet another ride to work, so Jinyoung offered to take him to get his mind off the upcoming date. Yugyeom wanted to tag along, and Jinyoung knew if that happened, they’d be making two different stops to get food. But Yugyeom shot him with the puppy eyes, and Jinyoung could feel himself give in. Damn him and his soft heart. Thank god Jackson would pick them up instead of him.
And, as expected, Jinyoung waited outside a convenience store as Yugyeom and BamBam bought ramen. As he waited, someone came up to him. The man looked vaguely attractive; his features fit each other perfectly and gave him a gorgeous aura. “Excuse me?” Jinyoung pinched himself discreetly to get him out of his funk.
“How may I help you?” The stranger offered a slight smile, and Jinyoung had to focus really hard on his eyes instead of his lips.
“I’m a little lost; I just arrived and I was wondering if you knew where Seoul National University is.” Jinyoung ‘ah’ed in understanding.
“Yeah, it’s a little far from here. Which airport did you come from?” The person ran a hand through his hair sheepishly.
“Gimpo Airport.”
Jinyoung snorted. “Apologies,” he said quickly, covering his mouth with his hand, “you went in the opposite direction.”
The stranger’s mouth opened, but he had nothing to say except a crass phrase, and Jinyoung snorted again. “Sorry- God, I’m an idiot.”
“No, it’s not a big deal. You can take the bus to University; there’s a bus that stops a few miles away. Or, you could take a taxi.” Jinyoung offered, and the man nodded.
“Yeah, thank you. Where’s the bus stop?” Jinyoung pointed out the way and the bus he had to take. “Thank you again, I appreciate it.” The man flashed a smile and Jinyoung could feel his knees shaking, but stood firm.
“No problem. Good luck.” As soon as the man turned the corner, Yugyeom ran up with the instant noodles in his hands.
“Hyung! We got the noodles.”
“Yah, what took you so long, brat?” Jinyoung pinched Yugyeom’s ear. “It’s cold.”
Yugyeom whined, and BamBam laughed at his friend’s misfortune before Jinyoung grabbed his ear too. “Hyung-“ the two youngest groaned, and Jinyoung huffed.
“Eat your noodles, or else you’ll be late, BamBam.” Jinyoung rolled his eyes, and BamBam cackled.
Yugyeom had kindly gotten him a packet of juice from the store, and as BamBam and Yugyeom made fun of each other, Jinyoung sipped on the juice like a mom watching their kids play in the pool. They arrived at BamBam’s work, a dance studio, and as BamBam stepped out, so did Yugyeom. Jinyoung threw him a questioning look, and Yugyeom smiled.
“I’m going to apply to work here,” Yugyeom explained, and Jinyoung nodded in understanding. “Don’t be too loud, Hyung. Youngjae’s neighbors might call the police.”
Jinyoung’s face hardened, and Yugyeom and BamBam ran into the building cackling like the little devils they are. “Yah, Kim Yugyeom,” he muttered under his breath, well aware the taller man couldn't hear him.
But now was not the time to sulk around at his younger brother’s (loving) disrespect, he needed to get home and change for his date. On the way home, he passed by the bus stop he directed the stranger from earlier to, and saw the man sitting on the bench. Jinyoung laughed quietly, the situation was kind of funny once you thought about it.
Jinyoung remembered when he and Yugyeom had first moved to Seoul from Jinhae-gu. The younger had gotten lost so many times, and Jinyoung had gotten lost even more times trying to find Yugyeom. He hoped the stranger would be able to find his way around. Though, with that pretty face, Jinyoung didn’t think he would have any trouble getting help.
The stranger reminded Jinyoung a little of Jaebeom. When the older had first gone to Jinhae-gu to meet Jinyoung’s family, Jaebeom was lost at almost all times of the day. It was adorable, and honestly, Jinyonug felt a sense of satisfaction from feeling helpful to Jaebeom. Hopefully, I can be the same for Youngjae, Jinyoung thought as he pulled into the parking area of his apartment building.
He had about ten minutes to change before he had to leave again, and Jinyoung was too lazy to dress a little nicer, so he just threw on some jeans and an orange sweater that BamBam had tried (keyword: tried) to convince Jinyoug to get rid of. It was a comfy sweater, though, and Jinyoung liked it. Fuck BamBam.
Jinyoung remained proud of his sweater all the way up to when he texted Youngjae, letting him know he’s there. But as soon as Youngjae opened the door and looked at his shirt, Jinyoung could feel his ears turn red. “Hey,” Youngjae laughed. “I like your sweater.”
Jinyoung scrunched his nose, ears turning slightly red. “Thanks. I like it too.”
“No, seriously,” Youngjae patted Jinyoung on the back. “It’s not something that would look good on anyone, but you pull it off.”
“The more you talk about it the more self-conscious I get, you know?” Youngjae didn't respond, just laughed, and led Jinyoung up three flights of stairs. Youngjae’s apartment was comfortable, small enough for two people, with a lot of plants everywhere. The couch was a beige, matching the white rug, which Jinyoung wondered how it was so clean.
If he had a rug like that, Yugyeom would have spilt chocolate on it six times, BamBam would have dropped lipstick just as much, and Jaebeom’s cats would have ripped it to shreds whenever the older brought them over. “Do you like it?” Jinyoung looked up at Youngjae, and nodded.
“It’s very neat. Where did you get your barstools?” Youngjae snorted.
“Yardsale. Mark just repainted them.” Jinyoung chuckled, but Youngjae motioned him toward the couch and made him sit down. “Let me get some water and then we can look for something to watch, sound good?”
Jinyoung nodded again, it seemed like the only thing he could do right now. Youngjae walked behind the counter, and Jinyoung dug his feet into the rug, appreciating the softness of it. “How is this rug so clean?” he wondered aloud, and Youngjae sighed.
“It wasn’t. But I banned Mark from being on the rug with snacks after I got it professionally cleaned.” Jinyoung laughed.
“Is he that messy?”
“Not on purpose, no, but he likes to eat chips a lot, and the crumbs get all over the rug. I wouldn’t have minded if he ate gummies,” Youngjae gripes, returning with two glasses of water. “I brought you a glass too just in case.”
Jinyoung thanked Youngjae, bringing the glass to his lips and taking a sip, not noticing how Youngjae’s eyes moved to his eyes. “What movie do you want to watch?” Jinyoung asked, and Youngjae smirked, eyes moving back up to Jinyoung’s eyes.
“Aren’t I supposed to ask that?” Jinyoung hummed.
“Well, I like most movies. Romance, comedy, and horror are some of my favorite genres. Do with that as you will.” Jinyoung winked at Youngjae, and Youngjae laughed breathily.
“I like romance and comedy as well, but I don't sit well with horror.” Youngjae turned on the TV, scrolling through Netflix’s menus, before the two of them finally settled on some obscure comedy neither had ever heard of.
To be frank, Jinyoung was the only one paying attention to the movie. Youngjae couldn’t keep his eyes off Jinyoung’s profile, especially when the older one laughed loudly. Sooner or later, Youngjae found himself leaning in and Jinyoung turned his head and smiled flusteredly. “Hyung,” Youngjae starts breathily, “may I kiss you?”
Jinyoung whined out a yes, and Youngjae pressed his lips against Jinyoung’s tentatively, both men closing their eyes. Youngjae’s lips were chapped while Jinyoung’s were soft, and the difference was felt almost immediately. Youngjae attempted to lick his lips while still kissing Jinyoung, and as expected, Jinyoung parted his lips slightly. Youngjae jolted slightly, surprised, but got back into the groove of things.
He pressed further, Jinyoung’s back pushed into the arm of the couch. It wasn’t quite that comfortable, but Jinyoung ignored the feeling, instead opening his mouth a little wider. Youngjae took this opportunity and ran his tongue along the seam of Jinyoung’s teeth.
The whimper that came out of Jinyoung’s mouth surprised both of them, and Jinyoung quickly tried to explain himself. He started with a, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to-”, but was quickly cut off by Youngjae leaning forward and kissing him again.
The two kissed for what seemed like hours, but it was only about five minutes before Jinyoung broke away and whined out, “Can I suck you off, please?” The plea goes straight to Youngjae’s dick who nodded quickly and shifted backwards on his butt to let Jinyoung lean forward.
Jinyoung reached for Youngjae’s sweatpants, pulling it down as quickly as he could. However, before he removed Youngjae’s boxers, Jinyoung slid off the couch onto his knees and adjusted Youngjae to sit with his legs on either side of Jinyoung’s body. He then leans in.
“Fuck.” The obscenity spouted out of Youngjae’s mouth as soon as Jinyoung pressed his lips against Youngjae’s covered crotch. “Fuck, hyung.”
Jinyoung laughed breathily, the feeling making Youngjae moan, and Jinyoung pulled down his boxers at last, freeing Youngjae’s cock. “Youngjae-yah,” is all Jinyoung whined before leaning forward and licking a stripe up the younger one’s cock.
Before Youngjae could react, Jinyoung sucked the dick into his mouth and dipped his tongue into the slit. “Hyung-” Jinyoung looked up through his eyelashes at Youngjae and Youngjae almost creamed his pants. “Hyung, if you keep going I might cum right now,” Youngjae breathed.
Jinyoung popped off Youngjae’s cock with an obscene sound, and smirked, his full lips bitten to shame. “Good.” Youngjae swore he saw heaven and hell at the same time when Jinyoung sucks his cock down until his lips wrap around the base.
Youngjae’s hips twitched, and Jinyoung moaned, moaned, and swallowed around Youngjae’s dick. “Fuck, Jae-yah. Fuck my mouth,” Jinyoung rasped, popping off Youngjae’s cock and licking up the beading pre-cum. As soon as Jinyoung slid Youngjae’s cock back into his mouth, Youngjae gave him a questioning look, and Jinyoung nodded to reassure the younger.
Youngjae gave a few testing thrusts, and when all Jinyoung did was relax and open his jaw even wider, his thrusts built up until Jinyoung was drooling all down his chin and crying. It was when Jinyoung brushed his tongue alongside the bottom of Youngjae’s cock when the imaginary band around Youngjae’s cock snapped.
Youngjae cummed. His ears burned; he hadn’t meant to cum like a teenage boy watching porn for the first time, but a man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do.
“God, Jinyoung,” Youngjae wheezed. “How on Earth are you so good at this?” Jinyoung chuckles, the sound throaty and rough.
“Practice from college...and my three girlfriends,” he joked as an afterthought.
“Do you need any help?” Youngjae offered, but Jinyoung glanced at the TV and then the clock. The movie was over, and Jinyoung would have to pick something up for dinner.
“No, maybe next time,” Jinyoug sighed, throwing Youngjae a wink and a smile. “I have to feed the kiddos.”
Youngjae laughed, bright and loud as always. “Can’t let them starve. Drive safe back.” He leaned forward, planting a much more sweet and much less sensual kiss on Jinyoung’s lips. Something that Jaebeom would do. Jinyoung’s ears burned; he just sucked off Youngjae, why is he thinking about Jaebeom. “Jinyoung?”
Youngjae’s voice brought Jinyoung back to his senses, and he smiled.
“Will do.”
On the way home, Jinyoung couldn’t stop thinking about why Jaebeom suddenly popped into his head. Fuck it.
Jinyoung steered to the side of the road, parking in front of a convenience store, and called Youngjae. “Jinyoung?”
“Hey, Youngjae,” Jinyoung said, voice thick. “Um, I don’t think this will work out. I’m really sorry, I did like you in that way. But I also have feelings for someone else and I don’t want to lead you on. It’s nothing against you, I just-”
Youngjae cut him off. “No, it’s okay, Jinyoung. It’s Jaebeom, isn’t it?” Jinyoung paused.
“How’d you know?”
“I saw how you looked at him, and how he looked at you.” Jinyoung snorted.
“Oh, he’s not gay. But I just don’t think I could date you if I had major feelings for him as well,” Jinyoung laughed shortly.
He could hear Youngjae sigh in the background. “Well, whatever you say. But hey, if you ever want to, my door is open. After all, I am a lonely old man,” Youngjae ended with a joke, and Jinyoung scoffed.
“If you’re old, what am I?”
“An ancient and wise sage. Bye, hyung,” Youngjae snarked before hanging up, and Jinyoung stuck his middle finger up at the phone screen even though he knew it would do nothing. Glancing to the side, Jinyoung decided to pop into the store before heading to Jaebeom’s apartment.
He picked up a few bottles of soju and some packets of snacks before paying and leaving. Before he started driving, though, he texted Yugyeom to let him know he would be late in getting home. For some reason, Jinyoung didn’t tell the younger he was going to Jaebeom’s place, chalking it up to the fact Yugyeom would probably berate him.
He arrived at Jaebeom’s floor, letting himself in with the key given to him when the apartment was leased, and saw something he hadn’t meant to.
Jinyoung was going to confess.
Really.
He was.
But Jaebeom was shirtless, and there was a naked man. Yes, man. Standing next to him. And when Jinyoung says naked, he means naked. The man had nothing but a pair of lace underwear on, and one of Jaebeom’s tank tops. Something he did not want to see. And definitely not next to Jaebeom.
Jinyoung dropped the bag of food and just as Jaebeom opened his mouth in disbelief, booked it out of the apartment. Jinyoung forwent the elevator, just thundering down the stairs and into his car before driving just past the speed limit to reach his home.
When he burst into his door, Yugyeom looked up, shocked at his brother’s face. Before Yugyeom could even say anything, Jinyoung choked out a, “Don’t,” before practically running into his room and slamming the door.
A reasonable reaction.
What wasn’t a reasonable reaction, however, was the fact that Jinyoung stayed holed up in his room for a week. Yugyeom tried picking the lock, but Jinyoung had moved his desk in front of the door. He only took the food left in front of the door once it was cold, and answered no calls.
Worried was an understatement when it came to how his friends and family were feeling. His mother called multiple times at the prodding of Yugyeom, and hell, even Youngjae came over to try to coax him out of his room.
Jinyoung wouldn’t budge, however. He refused to even open the door. It just hurt. Jinyoung didn’t know the exact reason.
Was it the fact Jaebeom never told him he was gay? Jinyoung knew it could have been a one time thing or the older had just found out, but it still hurt. Maybe it was because Jinyoung had finally picked up the courage to tell Jaebeom how he felt, but then...that situation happened.
Jinyoung doesn’t even want to think about it, but he couldn’t. He tried opening his laptop to work, but his mind inevitably wandered to Jaebeom and the stranger’s look of surprise. He tried reading his English dictionary, but he saw the notes Jaebeom doodles in them in secondary school, and his heart wrenched.
He knew he was wallowing, he knew it was insanely and exceedingly unhealthy. But staying in his room and crying just seemed so much safer than going out into the world.
But Yugyeom was not having any of that. He was not ready to watch his older brother decay, and so, forced the door open and pushed the desk forward just enough to get through and into Jinyoung’s room, closing and locking the door behind him.
“Hyung, talk to me,” Yugyeom pleaded when he sat on the bed next to Jinyoung’s bundled up body.
Hearing his baby brother on the verge of tears and begging, Jinyoung finally released the dam, head buried in the younger one’s lap. He sobbed for hours, Yugyeom just petting his hair. He didn’t know how long he cried, but he did know at some point, he had fallen back asleep. Crying takes a lot of energy, you know.
When he wakes up, Yugyeom is still there, still holding him. “Hyung, do you want to talk about it,” Yugyeom tried to coax Jinyoung to speak, and Jinyoung sighed. He really couldn’t wallow all week about this; this was just sad.
Jinyoung swallowed once, twice, then started to explain. The entire time, Yugyeom kept a neutral face, but Jinyoung could see the pity in his eyes. “So...in conclusion, I’m an idiot,” Jinyoung laughed, voice rasped and tired.
Yugyeom clucked his tongue, sighing. “No, hyung, you’re not. You were just shocked and hurt. We can’t help how we feel.” Jinyoung shrugged.
“I know, Gyeom-ah. I just don’t want it to hurt that much.” Yugyeom nodded and Jinyoung returned his head to his younger brother’s lap.
“Hyung, I’m going to take you out.” Jinyoung’s eyes snapped to Yugyeom’s face, and Yugyeom blanched. “Not like that, dumbass! I’ll take you around town tomorrow; we’ll just forget the past few days, all right? Ten hyung will be in the dance studio as well, and you can meet him.”
Jinyoung just grunted, worn out, and Yugyeom petted him back to sleep, slipping out of the room and into the kitchen where Jaebeom was waiting worriedly. “Is he doing all right?” was the first question out of Jaebeom’s mouth, and Yugyeom shrugged.
“He’s as good as he’ll be, hyung. He’s unhappy, maybe disappointed, but I don’t know when he will be out of his funk,” Yugyeom explained. “I’m taking him to meet Ten hyung tomorrow, hopefully that can get his mind off the fact you never told him you were bi. He must have felt so hurt seeing you.” Yugyeom wisely left out the part where Jinyoung also had a crush on him.
From the tone of his voice, Jaebeom could tell Yugyeom was mad at him. “Look, I didn’t...I didn’t think it was important.” Jaebeom wrung his hands. “Not that I didn’t want to tell him. I just-”
“Don’t give me excuses,” Yugyeom snapped. ���You hurt my brother. Unintentional, or not, you withheld it for your own personal reasons. I can’t stay angry for long, but I advise you to get out of the apartment for now.” Jaebeom took a step back, pausing, but left soon after.
Yugyeom slumped over the counter, tired out. He hadn’t meant to snap at Jaebeom; who was he to be angry about Jaebeom hiding when he had done the same thing to Jinyoung? Well, the difference was that Jinyoung hyung doesn’t have a crush on me, he thought.
He really hoped meeting Ten hyung would bring Jinyoung out of his slump, but he doubts that it would happen. But maybe, just for a short while, it would distract Jinyoung.
So, when Yugyeom drove Jinyoung to the studio and Ten hyung was waiting outside, he really didn’t expect Jinyoung to laugh and say, “Oh, the lost guy! I didn’t know you were Yugyeomie’s ‘Ten hyung.’”
“Hyung, you know him?” Jinyoung nodded.
“Yeah, when I was driving BamBam to work, he asked me for directions.” Yugyeom’s mouth dropped open.
“No way,” he laughed. “Hyung, you literally know everyone.” Jinyoung snorted, pulling Yugyeom’s ear, and the three of them headed into the dance studio.
“Ten hyung, did you know Jinyoungie used to be a dancer as well?” Yugyeom began to say, and Jinyoung groaned, attempting to swat at Yugyeom.
“Kim Yugyeom, I swear-” Yugyeom dodged him, cackling. Ten watched, amused.
“Well. I’m sure you will be able to keep up with me and Yugyeom, then?” Jinyoung shook his head.
“Oh, no no, I’m not going to dance.” Yugyeom smirked, and Jinyoung rolled his eyes. “Seriously. You can’t make me.”
Jinyoung flopped on the ground, sweaty and tired. “Love you too, hyung,” Yugyeom teased, poking Jinyoung’s sweaty forehead. Jinyoung grabbed the younger’s hand, pulling him down to wrestle, and Ten laughed.
“Okay, you two kids, no more fooling around,” Ten jokingly reprimanded. “Jinyoung-ssi; I didn’t expect you to catch up to me and Yugyeom this easily.”
Jinyoung snorted, flicking his hair out of his face. “I’m not that old, you know. I’m only, what, two years older than you? It’s only been three years since I graduated, too.”
Ten’s head cocked. “Really? I didn’t know that. Somehow I thought you would be older.” His lips pulled into a sweet smile, and Jinyoung could see Yugyeom mirror the smile. He laughed internally at his brother’s obvious crush. It was wholesome, cute, and not like his own trash bin of a love life. He winced at the memory of Jaebeom’s face when he caught him at his apartment yesterday, and the motion didn’t go unnoticed by Yugyeom.
“Hyung, do you wanna get us something to eat? I want to ask Ten hyung something.” Jinyong nodded quickly, eager to get his thoughts out of the dumpster.
“Yeah, I’ll just pop over to the convenience store a block down, do you guys want anything specific?”
After Ten and Yuyeom threw their dozens of orders at him and Jinyoung forced them to write it down, he slipped out the door and studio, walking down the road in the brisk and cool weather. Unfortunately, Jinyoung had forgotten his jacket. The sun was out, though, so Jinyoung wasn’t too unhappy. It was just a quick walk and the store would probably be warmer than outside.
Inside the store, Jinyoung was in the middle of a purchase, when he heard his name being called. “Jinyoung-ssi!” Ten was waving to him from outside the store. Jinyoung finished up his purchase, taking the plastic bag and meeting Ten outside as the two of them began the way back.
“Hey, Ten. What’s up?”
“I wanted to return your jacket; it’s a bit windy.” A pause, and then Ten opened his mouth, “Jinyoung-ssi, does Yugyeom have a crush on me?”
Jinyoung choked on the juice pack he had opened on the walk. “You should ask him that yourself, Ten-ah.”
Ten ignored him, going on with his thoughts. “I like him, but not in that way. And I don’t want to let him down; he’s a good friend.”
Jinyoung sighed. “Ten, seriously. You need to ask Yugyeom yourself, and tell him yourself. He’s a good kid, and sensible. He won’t take it to heart.”
“I suppose so.” They’re quiet until they reach the building, where Yugyeom was waiting in the lobby.
“We’re not supposed to eat in the dance room, so we gotta eat here, hyungs,” Yugyeom said, taking the bag from Jinyoung and rifling through it for his tteokbokki chips. “Ah, hyung, you forgot my sweet potato snacks.”
Jinyoung rolled his eyes. “Yugyeom, you consume an unholy amount of those at the apartment, you can deal with me forgetting them this time.” At Ten’s look, he added, “I’m running to the bathroom. Don’t touch my snacks.”
While in the bathroom, Jinyoung debated listening in the hallway to hear what Ten and Yugyeom had to say, but he decided against it. Yugyeom was old enough to make decisions himself.
As he waited for a reasonable amount of time for Ten and Yugyeom to stop talking, his phone binged with a text from the unknown number from earlier. The text read, ‘This is Mark, Youngjae’s roommate,�� and Jinyoung paused.
He took a screenshot, sending it to Youngjae, but the younger didn’t respond. He’s probably busy at Ars. As he slipped his phone back into his pocket, he stepped into the hallway where Ten was waiting. “Hey, Jinyoung-ssi. So. Would you like good news or bad news first?”
“What do you mean?”
“Well,” Ten smiled awkwardly, “Yugyeom felt like he needed space to get over me, so he went home. The good news is he still wants to be friends as well. The bad news is that I take the bus and can’t give you a ride home.”
Jinyoung sighed, running a hand through his hair. Of course Yugyeom would do that. “It’s fine, I’ll just call a friend to take me home,” he bit out, not quite angry but not exactly happy either.
He called Jackson almost immediately. “Hey, Park Gae, what’s up?”
“Jackson, I need a ride home. Yugyeom left me at the dance studio.” Jinyoung ripped his phone away from his ear. Jackson had yelled into the phone with excitement.
“Dance? I didn’t know you danced, Jinyoungie-ah! I wanna see you sometime!”
“Yeah, no,” Jinyoung said almost immediately, “but I do need a ride home.”
Jackson laughed. “About that...sorry, no can do. I’m out of town for the weekend. I know you’re not on speaking terms with Jaebeom, but you could try to ask him. I don’t know what’s going on with you two. But I’m sure he’ll be fine with driving you.”
“...Yeah.” Jackson hung up, unaware of Jinyoung’s hesitation. Looks like he’s out of the option. Jinyoung rang up Youngjae next, but he didn’t answer again. Looks like Jinyoung needed to take the bus. As he pocketed his phone, that unknown number from earlier claiming they were Mark called, and Jinyoung, at his wit’s end, answered.
“Is this Park Jinyoung?” The voice on the other end was deep, especially through the phone, and Jinyoung felt like if he wasn’t so obsessed with Jaebeom, he might fall in love with this voice as well.
“Yes, why?” The voice laughed.
“I’m Youngjae’s roommate. Youngjae, say hi to your ex.” Jinyoung choked, and he could hear Youngjae in the background.
“Why are you calling Jinyoung? How’d you get his number?” Jinyoung couldn’t not laugh at the confusion laced in Youngjae’s voice.
“Anyways,” Mark, Jinyoung presumed, continued on, “I texted you because I have something I need to clear up with you. Can we meet up?”
Jinyoung frowned. “What do you need to clear up? I’ve never met you in my life.”
“You’ve met me once. At Jaebeom’s apartment.” Jinyoung’s heart raced.
“I’m not sure I would want to meet up with you, then. For one, you slept with my best friend when I didn’t even know my best friend liked men,” Jinyoung took a deep breath. “And for two, I saw your dick hanging out some lacy underwear. I don’t think I could look at you straight in the eye after that.”
Mark laughed loudly, and if he strained his ears, Jinyoung could hear Youngjae in the back laughing just as loudly. “Yeah, I’m really sorry about that. That...was not what was supposed to happen. Look, man, I promise I’m not evil. Ars is closed today; I’ll even bring Youngjae along. Is that fine with you?”
Jinyoung sighed. “Sure. I guess so. You’re going to have to pick me up though, Yugyeom left me at Easy Dance Studio.” Mark snorted.
“Is this your super secret plan to use me as a chauffeur?” Jinyoung finally laughed at that, agreeing between breaths. “I knew it. We’ll be there in ten minutes.”
They were five minutes late, but Jinyoung didn’t think about it. He was too busy trying to avoid Mark’s eyes as he slid into the backseat and fiddled with his fingers. “Hey, Jinyoung,” Youngjae leaned around the passenger seat, offering Jinyoung a soft smile. “How was your week?”
“Shitty-” Jinyoung said without thinking, and both Mark and Youngjae laughed.
“Sounds like it,” Mark said, and paused for a split second before words came tumbling out of his mouth. To be honest, half of it was in English and Jinyonug only understood the words ‘sorry,’ and ‘Jaebeom,’ and ‘never.’
“Hold up, Mark-ssi. Can you speak in Korean?” Jinyoung asked, furrowing his brows, and Mark laughed, albeit a bit more strained.
“Yeah. Sorry. I wasn’t sleeping with Jaebeom. That’s the first thing I should start out with. I had sex with Jackson, and I wasn’t aware Jackson had a roommate. But when I woke up, Jackson had left for out of town, which was kind of dumb. Who leaves a stranger in their apartment?”
Youngjae prodded Mark. “Hyung. Off topic.”
“Sorry, sorry. But Jaebeom was there, and he had lent me a tank top, though none of his pants stayed up. Apparently Jackson had thought Jaebeom would get rid of me if I tried anything. That was when you walked in. And you entered. Though correctly, you had assumed Jaebeom was not straight and hadn’t told you. But we never fucked.”
Jinyoung sat in the backseat in complete silence for the rest of the ride, and both Mark and Youngjae felt they shouldn’t say any more. But when they reached his apartment, before leaving, Jinyoung spoke. “Thank you for telling me, Mark. I’ll have to talk to Jaebeom soon. But I appreciate it, and if I could ever get the image of your penis out of my head, I’d love to be your friend.”
Mark chuckled. “That sounds great. Please do not think about my penis, even if I know it’s great.” Youngjae choked, slapping Mark on the back.
“Hyung! Don’t praise your dick in front of me and Jinyoungie hyung.”
Jinyoung rolled his eyes and smiled, getting out of the car and waving at the two friends as they drove off. Once they were out of sight, he stood in front of his apartment building for a few minutes before heading up.
Yugyeom was out, having left a note dictating he was hanging out with BamBam, so Jinyoung took this opportunity to text Jaebeom and asked him to come over. Jaebeom had replied almost instantaneously with confirmation, and Jinyoung waited in anticipation.
Jaebeom didn’t live too far, so he only had to wait fifteen minutes, though they felt like hours. The sound of the door unlocking caused Jinyoung to whip his head toward the kitchen entrance, locking eyes with Jaebeom as he rounded the corner.
“Hi.” Jinyoung broke the ice first, and Jaebeom immediately added a hyung to the end of that, as per habit, before he started crying. “Oh, hyung.” Jinyoung immediately came around the island, wrapping an arm around Jaebeom.
The two stayed like that in silence save the refrigerator humming. When Jaebeom finally got all his tears out, he whispered out an, “I’m so sorry,” and Jinyoung’s heart broke once again.
“Hyung, don’t be sorry.” Jaebeom shook his head, and Jinyoung quieted.
“No, Nyoungie, let me finish.” Jaebeom took a few deep breaths. “I’m sorry I never told you I was bisexual. It sounds stupid of me, but I was scared how you would react. I know you are for the LGBT+ community, but when I found out I was, I didn’t know. And then I just kept it a secret for so long; I never felt like it would ever be the right time to tell you. I’m sorry I hurt you and lied to you.”
Jinyoung laughed through his own tears. “Hyung, I haven’t been completely honest with you either.” Jaebeom quieted, and Jinyoung took the opportunity. His heart hurt from pounding so hard against his ribcage, but it was now or never. “I’ve been in love with you for years, since before college.”
Jaebeom says nothing for a minute, and Jinyoung can feel his heart drop. When Jaebeom shifted, Jinyoung kept his eyes trained forward until he felt Jaebeom’s breath on his jawline. The younger turned; confused, when Jaebeom leaned forward, pressing his lips against Jinyoung’s.
“Jaebeom hyung?” When their lips part, Jinyoung asks the only question on his mind.
“We’re both idiots, huh?” Jaebeom snorted, and even with the tears running down his face and the wet noise, Jinyoung had never seen someone more beautiful. “I love you too.”
Jinyoung’s mouth dropped open, and Jaebeom laughed again. “Hyung, please don’t joke around like that,” Jinyoung pleaded, but Jaebeom shook his head.
“No, Jinyoungie. I promise. I’m not. I know it may not have seemed that way, but I promise I do. I do. I love you.” Jinyoung cried again.
He’s never cried so much over the span of ten days, much less a year. But somehow, this seemed worth it.
#got7writerscollective#jinyoung#park jinyoung#jinyoung got7#got7#igot7#got7 fanfiction#got7 fanfic#mxm#member x member#jjp#jj project#got7 jjp#jaebum#Im Jaebeom#Im Jaebum#jaebeom#Lim Jaebum#Lim Jaebeom#Jaebeom x Jinyoung#gay#much dumb#very gay#dumb gay#angst#fluff#got7 fluff#got7 angst#jinyoung angst#jinyoung fluff
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He Knew
Pairing: Colt Kaneko x MC (Ellie Whitnall)
Book: Ride or Die (post book 1)
Word Count: ~4600
Rating: R (language, referenced sensual content, referenced violence)
Summary: The five times Ellie came back, and the one time she didn’t
Author’s Note: Written for @rodappreciationweek Day 2 - Colt Kaneko. This is my first time not only writing Colt, but also my first time writing for one of my Choices couples that don’t end up “happily ever after.” I adored the bittersweet endings we got in ROD, and I wanted to keep that vibe here. This is pretty different from my usual writing tone/genre, so be forewarned - this is not a happy tale, but the crumbling apart of a relationship. It think the warnings listed in the rating section cover the content here.
It wasn’t really goodbye. He knew she’d be back. There was no way she would be able to stay away, to just fall back into a world where her only thrills came from acing a test. That was too easy for her. She needed more, the push, the challenge, the adventure. He knew because he was just like her.
He wasn’t sure exactly when she’d be back, though. He was sure she’d be back in LA for Thanksgiving, but he didn’t expect her to come looking for him then. Besides, the shop was still in ruins. He wouldn’t be easy for her to find at this point. He rode past her dad’s place early on Thanksgiving morning and saw her blue Shokai Fourier sitting in the driveway. But he didn’t see her then.
Same thing about a month later, her car parked in the driveway when he drove by a few days before Christmas. But it didn’t surprise him that she wasn’t ready to come back to his world, not just yet. That first semester of college probably had enough novelty to keep her from getting too bored. New friends, new freedoms, new knowledge.
It’s not like he wasn’t busy, too. Hunting down the remnants of the Brotherhood while not attracting any unwanted attention was a new mission, one that required a new sort of careful calculation and anticipation. He wasn’t the type to sit around pining, moping, waiting on some girl, just like he was sure she wasn’t longing for him. They were alike in that way - they didn’t let their emotions define them.
It wasn’t until the anniversary of Pop’s death that he really felt it, deep down, that he… fuck it, that he missed her. Because no one else got him, not the way she did. No one else was quite like her. He was a few drinks in, sulking in the room he was renting from X’s old roommate when he did the thing he swore he would never do - he pulled out his new phone and searched “Ellie Whitnall” on Pictagram.
Her hair was darker, no longer highlighted, but still pulled back in that ponytail. And that damn sweatshirt was nowhere to be seen. Instead it was her in a crop top and a skin-tight pair of jeans in a line with six other girls, a smile on all of their faces as their arms wrapped around each other’s backs. Her lounging on the grass with one of the same girls, textbooks sprawled out around them as they both laughed. Her eating a slice of pizza in some tiny restaurant, a blond dude who looked like a preppy douchebag sitting in the booth next to her.
She looked good, happy enough. It made him proud, but the worst parts of himself wished she was just a little miserable. Not just because he was mourning and miserable himself, and misery did fucking love company, but because she didn’t belong in a world that was bland and ordinary. She burned too bright for such pedestrian experiences. She would see that soon, and she would be back. Until then he just had to keep working on avenging his father’s death, making the Brotherhood pay for all the shit they’d done. And that’s what he did, not noticing as May and June passed by. But then July came.
He was working at the sideshow, trying to find out where Wallace had last been spotted when he saw her on the dance floor. She was wearing a little white tank top and a light blue skirt that was short enough it barely covered anything. It took all his willpower to listen to what the little punk was telling him and not just march over there and kiss her, welcome her back where she belonged. But business had to come first. Besides, she was only dancing with her brunette friend, Riya, and the guy who had worn the orange tux to prom.
“I knew you couldn’t stay away” he murmured into her ear when he finally, finally could join her. She tensed at first, as he came up behind her, snaking his hand around her waist, his fingers tracing along the thin strip of skin between her shirt and skirt, but she relaxed into him when she recognized his voice. She spun to face him, her arms reaching up to rest on his shoulders.
“Who says I’m here for you? Riya and Darius just wanted a taste of what I was up to last spring.”
Colt shook his head. “Nah, you wouldn’t have worn that if you weren’t here for me,” he said as his eyes traced over her gentle curves, settling back on her face, just as beautiful and determined as he’d remembered.
“It’s July in LA. Some of us actually dress for the heat.”
He chuckled lightly, leaned down, and kissed her. She tasted the same, her fingers felt the same as they crawled up his neck and clutched onto his hair. When he tugged her out of there and handed her his spare helmet, her arms felt the same as she wrapped them around his chest. And when they got to his new studio apartment in Broadway-Manchester and stumbled towards his mattress as they stripped as quickly as they could, she felt the same as he sunk into her, both of them moaning in relief.
After, they talked all night, lounging on his mattress, drinking cheap beer and eating the string cheese they found in his pathetically empty fridge. About her classes and seminars, her roommate from some tiny town in Nebraska who had never seen an escalator before coming to Langston, and her upcoming research project. About his plans to reopen the auto body shop next year, now that the heat was finally dying down and he could go back. About how Ximena was still around, ready to help out, but how Toby had made his way north to San Fran, working for some startup that was looking to get into the high-tech auto accessory game. About how Mona would be up for parole in a few months.
“When do you head back?” he finally asked as the sun started to peek through the window, his hand tracing along her spine as she curled up against his side, her head resting on his shoulder.
“Tomorrow,” she said, after a moment, “Dr. Frisch wants me to start on my research next week so that we can get a prototype built before the end of the fall semester.”
Colt swallowed before sliding his fingers under her chin and tilting her head up, looking straight into her brown eyes. “You happy?”
She nodded gently. “For now.”
“Not bored?”
“Not yet.”
“Just want to make sure they aren’t wasting your talents.”
“Colt…”
“Just remember, you shouldn’t settle for bland.”
“I know, Colt. I know.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Even though it had been over a year since he last saw her in person, he knew she would be back someday. She had his new number now, and every so often she would send him a little text or photo. They had no agreement, had made no promises to each other, still her messages were sometimes flirty, sometimes sexy. The blond idiot still hung around her Pictagram, but if she didn’t feel obligated to keep things between them… friendly or some shit, it wasn’t any of his business really.
The summer after her sophomore year at Langston, she stayed out east, hired on for some summer research program. But Colt was busy, too. The shop was open again. It wasn’t officially under Colt’s management, not until the statute of limitations ran out next year, but he had a couple of mechanics he’d hired on, keeping things on the up and up for the moment. Everyone knew Colt was running the show.
One day in October, he was at the shop, on a creeper under some rich asshole’s Porsche Cayman GTS when Ricky, his newest hire, called out for him.
“Hey, Kaneko. Some chick is here and says she needs to talk to you.”
He rolled his eyes as he pushed himself out. Ricky was talented, but he was far too much of a pushover. “I’m in the middle of this, Ricky.”
“I know, boss… but she kinda acted like you guys were… she seemed like she knew you personally.”
Wiping his hands on his pants, he strode over, ready to tell off whatever entitled little girl thought she could demand to see him, but then he caught sight of her. The sweatshirt was back, but her hair was even darker than it had been last summer.
“Ellie? What are you doing here?” He was shocked by her appearance in his shop, in the middle of the semester, and every instinct to tease her about not being able to stay away went out the window when he saw the look on her face, so hollow and lost. He ushered her into his office, closing the door and hearing it all. How her dad was in the ICU at UCLA after he’d suffered a massive heart attack. How she’d had to go on a leave of absence for the rest of the semester.
“The doctors think he’s going to be okay, but I can’t… I can’t go back to the house alone. Not after everything,” she finished, perched on the end of his desk.
“You’re here by yourself?”
“Riya transferred to UC Oakland to be with Darius, so other than you… I don’t really know anyone here anymore.”
So the blond douche didn’t come with her. Either he was even more of a dickwad than Colt pictured, or he wasn’t that important to Ellie. Either way, it was all Colt needed to know. He tugged her onto his lap and wrapped his arms around her. He didn’t tell her things would be alright, because unlike some people, he wasn’t stupid enough to try and lie to her. To make her promises he couldn’t keep.
So he did what he could. He took her back to his apartment, poured her shots of tequila, and fucked her senseless. There was nothing he could do to make things better. But he could make her forget, at least for a little bit. It’s what she would have done for him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Ellie coming tonight?” Ximena asked as Ricky spread out the takeout on the table in the breakroom.
“Haven’t seen her around much lately,” Ricky said, opening the containers of fried chicken.
“She’ll be back,” Colt said with more confidence than he actually felt. It wasn’t that he doubted that she’d be back… eventually. But she was pissed at him. Really pissed. And he wasn’t sure how long it was going to take her to cool off.
It was absurd that she was angry with him when he was the only one who wasn’t handling her with kid gloves, instead treating her like the grown-ass woman she was. Her dad was recovering just fine, but Ellie kept putting off going back to Langstson. When she’d told him she’d pulled out for the spring semester, though, he’d told her exactly what he thought about that. That she was being stupid. That she was only sticking around out of guilt over her last few months of high school. That she was wasting herself.
“What happened to you telling me I would always have a spot on your crew?” she’d yelled at him, tears flowing down her cheeks.
“Not like this, with you just bumming around, aimless. Fucking around, not really doing anything. You’re better than that, Ellie.”
She’d stormed out of his apartment after their fight, and he hadn’t seen her in eight days. He assumed she was with her dad. It wasn’t worth dwelling on. She’d be back once she’d cooled off and realized he was right. But the days continued to tick by, with no sight of her around the apartment or the shop. After three weeks, he rode past her dad’s place, but the Shokai Fourier was still in the driveway, so he knew she was still in LA.
Finally, almost one month later she showed up at the shop, just as they were wrapping things up for the day. She walked straight into his office without so much as saying hello to anyone, so Colt took his time, finishing up with the spark plugs he was replacing before he joined her. She was sitting at his desk, scrolling through his spreadsheets, reviewing the shop’s finances. So damn presumptuous.
“I didn’t realize you were an accountant now,” he said, crossing his arms as he closed the door.
She spun in his chair, glaring at him. “Just seeing if you can afford to hire a mechanical engineer.”
“By my math, you’re only half a mechanical engineer at this point. That has to earn me a bit of discount on your salary.”
“I’m here to negotiate. If I’m going back for two more years at Langston, I need to know it’s going to be worth it. So make me an offer.”
Colt couldn’t fully suppress a smirk as he quirked an eyebrow at her. “What, am I supposed to write a number on a sheet of paper and slide it over to you?”
“I’m being serious, Colt.”
He rolled his eyes. “The offer’s the same as it’s always been - equal partnership, you and me, running this place.”
“And that offer will still be on the table in two years?”
“It hasn’t changed in the past two and a half, has it?”
She stood up with a nod at that, crossing the small office to stand in front of him, staring up at him, somehow looking imposing from five foot two.
“Should we shake on it?” he asked, widening his eyes to tease her, just a bit.
“I think we can do better than that,” she said before she stood up on her tiptoes and kissed him with all she had, shoving him back against the door in the process.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Colt glanced at his phone. 11:45 pm and no new notifications. She was supposed to be back from Riya and Darius’s wedding today, but as the minutes ticked by, he wasn’t sure if she was more upset than he’d anticipated.
Technically, they were both supposed to be back from the wedding today. But he’d gotten word about some… hot merchandise that was too good of a deal to pass up late on Friday, and so he’d shot Ellie a text to send Riya and Darius his congratulations before he turned his phone off. He’d figured she’d understand. She was as ambitious as him, after all.
But seeing as it had been radio silence all day Saturday and now Sunday, he was wondering what sort of Ellie was going to walk through that door. Either she was pissed, or something had happened to her, but he didn’t think she’d been in any danger in Napa.
His finger hovered over her name in his contact list. She hadn’t answered any of his calls earlier today, so he didn’t have much hope for this one. Just before he pressed down to foolishly call her yet again, headlights flashed through the front window of their apartment’s living room. She was home.
Less than a minute later, the deadbolt turned. There was Ellie, her little duffel bag in one hand, a garment bag in the other. She looked exhausted, and when she glanced up and saw him sitting at their little table, he noticed that her eyes were bloodshot. She didn’t say anything, just shook her head at him as she walked straight into their bedroom.
“Ellie, come on-” he started, chasing after her, but she slammed the door right in his face.
“I don’t even want to look at you right now,” she called through the door.
“It was three million worth of merchandise for only four hundred thousand. I couldn’t pass it up.”
The door flung back open, Ellie practically trembling with anger as she braced herself against the door frame.
“I was the fucking maid of honor, and my plus one didn’t show up!”
“None of them like me anyway.”
“Hmm, I wonder why,” she practically sneered at him as she shoved past him, stomping into the bathroom, slamming that door this time.
“You know we need to move more volume if we want to keep growing the shop. You’re the one who wants us to expand our territory into Vermont Knolls.”
“Fuck you!” echoed through the door.
“What do you want me to say? I made the call that I thought was best for our business.”
“How about ‘Sorry, Ellie. I was a total asshole’ as a starter?”
He winced at that. He probably should have led with an apology. He just didn’t think it would piss her off this much that he’d missed the wedding.
“Ellie, I am sorry. I just thought you would be fine with it since you told me to skip your cousin’s wedding last spring so we could close that deal-”
“-You didn’t even ask me this time.” she called out.
“I didn’t have time. And they are your friends. It’s not like I left you all alone with people you don’t know.”
The bathroom door swung open, but Ellie pivoted on her heel, sitting back down on the toilet seat.
“You say I’m your partner,” she said with a heavy sigh, “but you always make these decisions without me.”
“Oh, for fuck’s sake, this was a no-brainer. The pure profit on-”
“I don’t mean business partners. I mean in our… personal life.”
He frowned at that, crossing his arms, “What the fuck are you talking about? Where is this coming from?”
Ellie just shook her head. “I don’t know. Sometimes it just feels like… like no amount of growth at the shop will ever be good enough for you. Like you are never off the clock.”
“I’m not ever off the clock. That shop is Pop’s legacy, and with you, it’s grown bigger than he could have ever imagined. I don’t know why you’re acting like this was all me. We’ve built everything we have together. You’ve always been hungry to prove yourself in this world.”
“Look who’s talking! Don’t you ever think that maybe your father wouldn’t want you sinking into this world so single-mindedly after he tried to keep you away from it for so long?”
It was an old argument from her, one he hadn’t heard in years. “My pop made a lot of bad decisions. Underestimating what both of us were capable of was just one of them.”
Ellie’s phone chirped, and Colt felt lightheaded as he watched her stand up and pick up a pregnancy test off the counter next to the sink. “Well, I hope you do better than him,” she said, shoving the piece of plastic into his hand. “This decision’s all mine, and I’m keeping it.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It was his own fault she was staying with her father for a few nights. He’d been careless and just a little too reckless. The contact on the new stock of Tesla Model S’s had been a friend of Ricky’s friend. He should have vetted him better. He’d been too blinded by how good of a deal it was. But it was a mess from the start, and now they owed a crew in West Adams seven million in either cash or vehicles. At least he hadn’t gotten arrested. He’s pretty sure Ellie would have murdered him if that had been the case.
But he’d gotten them involved in a bad deal. It was 100% his fault. Not only was Ellie pissed at him for not being appropriately cautious with their business, but pregnancy had reduced her fuse significantly. She’d gone off on him when he’d returned from the drop with the terrible news. He didn’t blame her for wanting to take a few days away from him and the shop. He figured it would go a long way if he’d worked out a safe way to repay their debt by the time she came back, hence staying late in his office, trying to brainstorm the quickest way out of this mess.
At some point he must have nodded off in his chair at his desk, because suddenly he bolted awake, disoriented and panicked, grabbing for the handgun he kept in his top drawer before he recognized Ellie standing in his doorway. He let out a rough breath and moved to offer her his chair, but she just shook her head.
“It won’t be worth the effort it takes to stand up again,” she said, reading his intentions in a second. “I was waiting for you at home, but when it hit midnight and you weren’t back, I thought I might find you here.”
“I thought you were gonna stay with your dad for a few more days.”
“He was asking a lot of questions about us that I didn’t exactly want to answer. Besides, I figured you might need some help coming up with a plan.” Her hands rested on top of her stomach. She still had three weeks until her due date, and Colt had no idea how was going to stand up if she got any bigger. Not that he told her that.
“It's my mess, Ellie. I can take care of cleaning it up.”
She shook her head, rubbing her hands along her bump. “That’s the thing, Colt. Your messes impact all three of us. So even if it’s not my fault we’re seven million in the hole at that moment, I need to help you fix things. And the two of us working together has always gotten us better results than either of us working independently.
“But Colt, I need you to take a step back from this ‘high risk, high reward’ approach. It was one thing when it was just you and me, but we both need to be a bit more careful going forward. Our kid deserves parents that are alive and not incarcerated, alright?”
He sighed but nodded. “I just don’t want us to lose our edge. But I get it, Ellie. I do.”
She sighed as well before she said, “Come on. Pack up your stuff and meet me at home. We can work on solving this from the comfort of our bed, okay?”
“Sure thing. I’ll see you there.”
She gave him a little smile, so forced and empty it nearly shattered him, before turning and walking out the door. He wished he knew how to earn her trust back. But she was like him. She had high standards. Fixing things with her was going to take ages.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Colt ran his hands through his hair, trying to calm his breathing. She had to come back. She had to. She had his daughter.
This fight had been bad, worse than any other than he could remember. When Ellie had seen the news coverage of Shaw’s shanking in prison, she’d turned to him, horror etched across her face. She hadn’t even needed to ask if it was him. She’d just known that he’d ordered it.
He tried to get her to understand, to see that he’d only done what he had to do. Shaw had his initial parole hearing coming up soon. If he so much as breathed a whiff of freedom, not only was their entire shop and crew in danger, but so were their lives and Margot’s. He was just taking a necessary precaution.
But she’d not wanted to hear any of it. She’d marched into Margot’s room, throwing her clothes and toys into a bag before hefting her out of bed and marching her out to her car, strapping her into her booster seat while she was still sound asleep. Ellie hadn’t so much as said a word to him as she drove off. Of course she’d ignored every call and text from him since that time.
He’d taken to riding past her father’s house daily. Her Shokai Fourier was always there, but he was never lucky enough to catch a glimpse of her or Margot in the yard. It had been nine days since he’d seen his kid, and he was getting desperate. He didn’t know what to do.
He sat along the edge of the cliff, watching the waves crash along. It wasn’t calming him tonight. Nothing was going to calm him. He didn't know how long he sat there, but eventually he heard a car engine approaching behind him. He would have known that paint job in his sleep. The engine quieted and he felt Ellie approaching him, sitting down next to him, almost close enough to reach out and touch. Almost.
“This is it, isn’t it?” he asked, staring out over the Pacific, inhaling the salt of the sea air.
“Colt… I can’t raise her in a home where killing someone is an acceptable solution to a problem. You had to know I wouldn’t be able to stand by you when you ordered that hit.”
Her words stung, burned his soul. Of course he’d known that. She’d always had her lines her morals didn’t allow her to cross. But how did she expect him to just sit there and let a threat to the safety of his family potentially walk free?
“Aren’t you going to say anything?” she asked. He could hear the tears in her voice, but he couldn’t bring himself to look at her, to see revulsion and disgust in the place of love and trust.
“What is there to say? Nothing I can do will make you come back.”
He heard her sigh before he felt her fingers, tiny and gentle against the back of his hand. He turned his hand over and threaded their fingers together more out of habit than anything. He knew her well enough to know that this wasn’t a gesture of love or hope.
“Colt, I’ll always love you, but…”
“I know, Ellie.”
“Are you even sorry?”
He paused, thinking over her question. He knew what she wanted to hear, but he’d always respected her too much to attempt to placate her with pretty sounding lies. “I don’t regret it at all,” he finally said, “I did it for both of you.”
She didn’t recoil from him at that. He hadn’t said anything she didn’t already know in her soul anyway. She’d always understood him in ways others just couldn’t. After all she was just like him. Just like him in so many ways.
They were only really different in one key way. She tried to pretend that there was a way to live the life they did and to be “good,” to keep to some sort of moral code. He knew that wasn’t the case. Or maybe she was just a better person than him. It was hard to tell right now, when he felt so hollow and drained.
“We’ll work out times for you to see Margot,” she said after a few minutes of silence. “I think we probably both want to keep lawyers out of this.”
Colt just grunted in acknowledgement. Ellie gave his hand a little squeeze before she tugged her hand free. She pushed herself up off the ground and walked back to her car. He couldn’t bring himself to watch her drive away, so he just stared ahead as he listened to her ignition start.
It was goodbye. He knew she’d never be back.
Permatag: @choicesficwriterscreations @walkerswhiskeygirl @riley--walker @bebepac @ravenpuff02 @oofchoices @octobereighth @drakewalker04 @kimmiedoo5 @mfackenthal @thequeenofcronuts
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Crystal Rose
>>>Read on AO3<<<
The gang celebrates Mikasa's birthday.
What woke Eren up wasn’t any light or bad dreams, it wasn’t any alarm. It was the emptiness of the large bed, the lack of her body against his. Sitting up, he stared at the empty half, wondering what happened. Maybe Mikasa never existed in the first place, his brain reasoned. It would make sense too, as the person he dreamed up was way too perfect to be real, she had to be a figment of his imagination, the way he portrayed the ideal woman. Or maybe she was an angel, as he thought before, and her holy mission called her elsewhere.
Hmm.
Deep in thought, as one can be right after waking up, he ran his hand over the bedding. Warmth, it was warm, indicating that someone slept there after all. Confused now, because the made-up Mikasa theory was so fitting, Eren brought the cover up to press it against his nose. Yep, that was her scent, the one he could never truly identify yet it filled him with thoughts of home and happiness. Finally fully awake, Eren ran a hand through his hair, checking the bedtime clock. It was a bit after 3 AM, so Mikasa not being here meant only one thing. She had another nightmare.
Eren told her to wake him up when that happened, and she did so in the past, so her straight up disappearing was a bit worrying. Fully intent on finding his love and comforting her in those trying times, Eren rolled from the bed and left the bedroom. His search wasn’t very difficult. Mikasa was in the living room, sitting at a window seat and staring into the darkness outside. It didn’t look good, she was curled into a small ball, arms hugging her knees, making herself as tiny as she could. She heard him when Eren got closer, the huntress that she was, turning to face her fiancé. And what he saw immediately made his night miserable. Mikasa’s eyes were puffy and red with tears in them, her face was wet and streaked with her crying. She was sad, and it broke Eren’s heart into thousand pieces, reached so deep down and affected him on some primal level no other event could.
“You are dead.”, she told him in a grave voice, “It’s all over.”
It was obvious that Mikasa was talking about her dreams, as Eren didn’t feel like dying in reality. Coming to sit next to her, he gave her some distance, knowing that Mikasa was vulnerable right now and not sure if she wanted to be touched.
“What happened?”, he asked.
“We were all there, Me, Armin, Jean, Levi, even Annie and Reiner.”
“The big guy?”
She nodded, a few of the tears sliding down over her pale skin and down to the chin.
“Jean hit you first, weakened you somehow, then Reiner kept you from getting back up, but it was Armin who finished you off.”
Teaming up like that, Eren couldn’t help but wonder what he did to force his friends into this. In no way he could see Armin ever wanting to kill him, such a gentle soul as his friend did not like violence.
“I watched it all, from somewhere up high, I watched them do it, and I didn’t do anything to stop them.”, Mikasa continued, voice straining with pain, “And while it was terrible somehow I knew that it was necessary, that it was the only way. I felt peace because we saved the world by killing you.”
She put a hand over her heart, fingers clawing at the fabric frantically as she choked the words out. agony in every single syllable.
“I-I sa-said Goodbye E-Eren, and I… and you… yo-you were gone and…”
Mikasa broke, hiding her face as she sobbed openly.
“It’s…. It’s so cold…”, she pushed out in between the tremors that shook her body.
Gently, Eren reached outwards and touched her back, an offering of his body should she want it. She did, collapsing onto his chest and letting him wrap her in a hug while she cried her eyes out. Mikasa looked so small when she curled into him, so weak, it rubbed Eren the wrong way. He wanted to protect her so much, wanted to help her against these nightmares, but he was feeling useless. He held her tight, warmed her with his body heat, mind racing and trying to figure what he could say to make her feel better.
“I’m so sorry.”, he whispered, not even sure what he was apologizing for but it didn’t matter. It must have been his fault, if all his friends worked together to stop him, he must have done something terrible. Worst of all, he hurt Mikasa, and that was an unforgivable crime. All he wanted was to protect her, her safety and happiness was his highest priority. Yet his other self kept doing this shit, making her cry and he hated that Eren dude with passion. How dare he.
“Why am I and Levi the only one with those dreams?”, she cried, “Everyone I know is in them but no one remembers anything, just me and my brother.”
Levi’s nightmares were not nearly as vivid as Mikasa’s, much more muted and easier to ignore. But the fact that the sibling shared similar dreams was a strange one, Eren had to agree.
“You Ackermans are special, no other way to put it. You and Levi, I’ve never met anyone like you and I don’t think that I ever will.”
“But I don’t want to be special, I don’t want these things, nightmares and random headaches, I don’t…”, more tears spilled from her eyes, drenching Eren’s chest, “Why do they have to be sad? Why do you have to die or be in danger all the time? Why do we have to fight?”
Stroking her hair, he wasn’t sure what to say. Dreams are dreams, hard to influence and understand.
“I don’t know, but look at it this way.”, Eren pulled back, meeting her disturbed eyes, “If Armin, the smartest guy I know, killed me, then there was no other way.”
Her lips trembled again, letting him know that those words were not what Mikasa was looking for. Fuck. She folded into his arms, sobbing, and Eren felt like an asshole. Good going, Yeager. It was such a contrast, seeing her weak but knowing how strong she was. Physically he could feel it, holding her in his arms. The perfectly shaped biceps and firm shoulders, now shaking with her sobs, the weight against him reminding Eren of all the lean muscles her body possessed. She was so incredibly well-built, a warrior, a statue of ancient Greeks shaped into perfection. All for nothing, all useless now, Mikasa couldn’t fight away her fears, and losing her fiancé was very high on the worst nightmare list. She felt incredibly fragile as if she would shatter with the wrong touch, and that was something Eren feared from the bottom of his heart. Mikasa was helpless, paralyzed with sheer terror, and Eren hated seeing her like this, he wanted the strongest person he knew, both physically and mentally, back.
“I know that this sounds stupid, but it’s only dreams Miki.”, he tried a different approach, “You will always wake up from these, and I’ll be right there next to you, ready to hold you and chase those nightmares away. I’ll never leave because I love you more and more every damn day.”
She sniffed against his neck.
“Y-You promise?”
“I swear on my life. Dying would mean not spending more time with you, so I don’t plan on doing it anytime soon.”
Mikasa hiccupped and pushed away from his chest, eyes once again search his face. With the warmest smile Eren could muster, he wiped the tears away from her eyes as gently as he could.
“The way you say it, I am the villain in your dreams no? If all of you banded together to stop me, it must have been an epic adventure. Of course that Armin is the hero of the story, and you could never be on the evil side.”
“Why is that?”
He shrugged.
“You’re too pure, I’m the one corrupting you.”, moving closer, Eren whispered right in her ear, “I’m the bad guy.”
Finishing his sentence with a low growl, Eren could hear her giggle, and it instantly warmed him up. Anything to make her smile, he would go to any length to make her happy again. He kissed her cheek, then the side of her neck before pulling back up, checking if Mikasa is feeling better. She wasn’t crying anymore, and her eyes lost the terrible sadness in them. It was still there, muted, but it didn’t surprise him, Eren couldn’t even imagine how he would feel if he had a dream about Mikasa dying. Just thinking about it made his heart hurt, because how does one cope with losing your other half?
“You want me to cook you something?”, he suggested, knowing that his chocolate chip pancakes could usually cure Mikasa’s sadness.
But she was way too comfy here, sprawled on top of Eren and holding him close, so Mikasa shook her head.
“Let’s stay here for a while.”
“Okay.”
Bowing her head, Mikasa tucked herself into him, even pulling her legs up to get the most of her body touching his. A small part of Eren’s mind did wake, to tease him with the horny because he was still a man and Mikasa was everything one could wish for. Improper now, considering the nightmare and the situation they found themselves in, so Eren held himself back and stroked her back and exposed legs gently, feeling the muscles shift beneath the porcelain. Together, they stared into the darkness outside, not saying a word and simply being there together. Some time later, when she wasn’t falling asleep, Eren asked something that was on the back of his mind.
“Miki? Do you think that your dreams are going to stop now?”
“Why?”
“Well, since you guys killed me, didn’t you defeat the final boss?”
She sighed, shifting on top of him to be more comfortable.
“I feel like there’s still a little bit of the story to tell, but it is very close to being done.”
Bending, Eren kissed her hair.
“Let me know how it ends, I’m on the edge of my seat here.”
She giggled again, heavenly sound of bells.
“Will do, bad guy.”
“For you Miki, I’ll be the villain any day of the week.”
When Mikasa fell under again, she wasn’t bothered by any more dreams, welcomed by the darkness of restful sleep. Her awakening was also much nicer, she didn’t wake with a beating heart and sweaty palms, she slipped out of her sleep roused by an array of delicious scents.
After opening her eyes, it took Mikasa a moment to realize where she was because this was not their bed for sure. When the memories of her night conversation with Eren came back, it was clear that they fell asleep here at the window seat, cuddled together. As her fiancé was gone, her brain quickly connected the scents and his absence to come up with an ingenious statement. Eren was cooking.
Sitting up, Mikasa stretched, feeling the faint pull in her muscles caused by sleeping all curled. But craning her neck to get the kinks out, it did nothing to prevent her from smiling. They fell asleep wrapped in each other on a window seat, like a pair of lovesick teenagers. There is a certain charm to that.
Her hair a complete mess, eyes still with sleep in them, Mikasa padded over to the kitchen, curious to see what Eren was creating. He looked, hearing her enter, his smirk widening when he could feast his eyes on her body clad only in the shirt she stole from him, eyes inappropriately lingering on the way her nipples poked through the fabric. To stop his mind from going south first thing in the morning, Eren lowered his gaze, but that only made it worse since now he was staring at her legs instead. So pretty, so long, so toned, widening into those incredible thighs and the ass that he wanted to bite into. But eating ass for breakfast is not exactly nutritious, and Eren pushed these thoughts back. It was hard, wrestling his primal side into silence, but he did so, moving his gaze back towards the kitchen. He was doing something before Mikasa walked in and began distracting him by existing.
Luckily, she didn’t notice the hungry stare he threw her way, too busy exploring the various food he made. There were eggs, there was bacon, there were pancakes. Eren was cooking everything she liked, moving around in the kitchen smoothly, completely in his element.
“Is someone coming over?”, she asked, making him look up again.
“Nope.”
“Then why are you doing so much?”
“Well, you know why.”
She stared at him. He stared at her.
“Miki? You don’t know?”
It wasn’t their anniversary, that was for sure. It wasn’t the anniversary of the first time they “consummated” their relationship, a strange tradition that Eren kept bringing up, probably to make her flustered. What was she missing?
“Uhm…. Is it important?”
“Depends who you ask I guess, but it’s one of the most important days in the whole year for me.”, walking over, Eren dumped a chocolate chip pancake on the pile before spilling the secret, “It’s your birthday.”
“Oh?”, Mikasa’s eyes widened, “Oh!”
Grinning, Eren walked over to her and bent down, pressing a sweet kiss to her surprised mouth.
“Happy birthday babe, I love you.”, reaching to his back pocket, Eren brought out a small box, handing it over.
Mikasa took it with curious fingers, opening the gift and hoping that it wasn’t another bike. Several times in the past, Eren gave her a bike for her birthday, when a new model came out that was even more modern and faster than the one Mikasa had. Yet she adored the one she had right now and didn’t want to change. Her worry was unnecessary.
It wasn’t bike keys Eren gave her, it was a small collection of various pins and rings that Mikasa quickly identified as piercings. She could put those into her ears, decorating the pierced cartilage in various places. With this, she had a variety to choose from, because Eren picked several pairs for her, from skulls and crosses to straight industrials, complimenting her preferred style of clothing. It was a nice gift, and she thanked with a deep kiss that Eren appreciated.
With the ceremony of gifts concluded, Eren challenged Mikasa to some Tekken bouts, a decision he came to regret when she kept beating him over and over. He did sneak some wins in, but in the grand scheme of things, he was still the loser party. Must have been the long shifts at the hospital, he reasoned with himself, he had next to no time to play lately. Not that Mikasa was slacking, far from it, but she did find some time to train, because she pulled moves that Eren never saw before.
“We going again?”, she asked, all casual, sprawled on the couch in her victorious smugness.
“You’re on, Ackerman.”, he growled, hitting the rematch button.
Maybe it was the distraction of her presence, the way she tucked her legs beneath herself when she sat up. Maybe it was the way she bit her bottom lip when concentrating, or when she pushed the hair out of her face, trying her hardest to make it stay behind her ears. Excuses, Eren knew, but he ignored the voice of reason in his head. After having his ass kicked for about an hour, Eren’s pride couldn’t take it anymore and he dropped the controller to tackle her, tumbling together on the couch.
“Tired of losing?”, she asked, peering down at him while Eren buried his face in her chest.
“Yes.”
“But..”, she reached down, intertwining her fingers with his long hair, “Whatever else will we do?”
Abandoning his nice resting place, Eren pulled himself up to face her, noticing the slight blush rising to her cheeks.
“I have a few ideas.”
And he kissed her, swallowing that surprised gasp from Mikasa’s lips that turned into a giggle instead. She tasted amazing, like joy itself, and Eren took full advantage of being allowed to kiss the angel that she was. Her mouth moved with his, opening with a gentle moan when his tongue probed for access and then it was messy and breathtaking. She needed air, but Eren was relentless, descending to nip at her neck instead. His hands were busy too, one gently massaging her breast through the fabric while the other descended, grabbing a handful of that gorgeous ass of hers. Having such a perfect butt should be a federal crime, because it completely clouded Eren’s senses with desire, his fingers digging into that sinful temptation.
It reminded him of the incident that happened about a week ago when he came back from a long shift at the hospital at about four in the morning. Exhausted, he took a shower before joining Mikasa, who was already fast asleep in the bedroom. He collapsed, not even bothering to check where and rested his head on the first thing that was somewhat soft, his brain reasoning that it’s probably her chest. In the morning, Eren was mightily surprised when he discovered that he spent the night resting his head on Mikasa’s ass because she treacherously decided to sleep on her stomach. To punish her for the deception, he did the first thing that came to his mind, and that in retrospective was both stupid and unreasonable. He sank his teeth into the impromptu pillow, waking her up. He thought that it was going to be sensual, get her into the mood maybe, but he was dead wrong. Understandably, Mikasa didn’t like being awoken by having her butt bitten, and she complained, her “What the fuck, Eren?” echoing through the bedroom.
They made up after, and Eren apologized by giving her lazy morning cunnilingus which she took full advantage of, holding him down with her legs until she was completely satisfied. Then she got up, headed for the bathroom and went on with her day, leaving him with nothing but a raging hard-on. It was a fair punishment, and for once he didn’t complain.
Eren was torn back into reality by a harsh bite Mikasa planted on his neck, obviously noticing his memory trip. Reminded that here and now was way more important, he licked the pout away from her lips before claiming them in another bruising kiss. They didn’t even end up doing anything explicit, only a lot of kissing, some groping, and cuddling on the couch, enjoying each other’s presence. When Mikasa had her fill of new love bites, she decided to get a bit of a workout and turned on the music before walking over to the dance pole. Eren watched her for a time, mesmerized as always, because she once again completely defied the laws of gravity. Holding on the pole with her hands alone, she air walked up until she was upside down, anchoring herself with her legs instead. After that, her hands let go and Mikasa pulled herself up with nothing but her abdominals until she could grab the metal, her head back above her legs. Incredible. But in the end, seeing her being productive made Eren get off the couch as well.
With nothing better to do, he decided to bake a cake for the birthday girl. A small one, the main thing was already ordered and would arrive at the party, but Eren wanted to do it anyway. He was very good with cooking, but not so much with baking, and practice makes perfect. One day, he would manage to create such perfect cookies as his mother can do, present Mikasa with a plate and watch her eyes light up when she takes a bite. One day. So, he baked, Mikasa danced slash worked out at the pole, everything covered by the tune of rhythmic music she put on.
A lot of chocolate, that was important, because Mikasa liked it. Some strawberries too, and Eren was getting lost in the baking, his mind focusing on the task at hand. It wasn’t until she took a break and came close, sweat on her face, that he looked up from his work.
“What are you doing?”
Eren looked over the mess in the kitchen with a smirk.
“Baking.”
“I noticed, but why?”
It was kinda cute how obvious Mikasa could be sometimes, but Eren couldn’t tease her about it. He was the same, maybe even worse.
“Well you see,”, Eren turned back towards his work, heating the chocolate, “Certain someone has a birthday today, so I thought that I might bake her a cake.”
“….Huh.”
“Don’t worry, if you won’t like it I’m sure that Sasha will, she can relieve you of the burden at the party.”
“What party? Wait, there’s a party?”
“Yes ma’am. As it would seem, you have plenty of friends who would like to celebrate your birthday.”
Once the cake was in the fridge to cool down and Mikasa was done with her workout, Eren realized that he’s quite hungry. Not feeling like cooking right after working on the chocolate monstrosity, he decided to abuse the takeout system and order delivery. To get a second opinion on his choice of food, he turned to Mikasa who was scrolling through her phone.
“I could go for some sushi right now, you in?”
Her lips curled, but before Mikasa could say her usual quip, Eren took the wind right out of her sails.
“Yes, I’m suggesting it only because you are part Japanese and I am a huge racist. I’m also only dating you as a joke, because how could I ever love a half-breed. There, did I miss anything?”
Mikasa pouted, all her jokes dismantled before she could say them.
“No…”
“Good.”, he leaned over, pecking her on the lips, ”Now with that out of the way, Sushi?”
“Yes…”
The sushi was good, very good even, as the restaurant Eren chose was rather expensive. When they finished eating, Eren pulled out the cake, watching with bated breath as Mikasa took the first bite.
“So?” he asked, unsure if he didn’t fuck something up.
She chewed, slowly, taking her time. Damn woman, he was on the brink here.
“Its….”, her face lit up a huge grin appearing, “Amazing!”
Leaning over the table, she gave Eren a very proper “Thank you” kiss, so proper that he could taste the chocolate on her lips as well. When she sat down again, digging into the cake, Eren couldn’t help but smile himself. Seeing her happy made him so…. happy.
“I’ll have to bring some to mom then, she likes to make fun of my baking.”
“Carla doesn’t know what a talented son she has.”, Mikasa assured him, taking another bite.
“You are the only one who truly appreciates me, babe.”
She giggled at that, leaning over the table again.
“You want another taste of the cake?”
“I’ll never say no to that.”
He understood the offer, meeting her halfway. Eren wasn’t sure what of the taste was the cake and what Mikasa herself, but her lips were that tad bit sweeter with chocolate in the mix. When she had her fill, it was almost time to get ready for the party, and that threw her into an unsure mood. Even with all the experience she gained at the modeling agency, Mikasa had trouble picking out clothes to wear. She had so many! And it was mostly Eren’s fault, because he often gave her something out of nowhere, saying that this will look great on her. Usually, he was correct, but now Mikasa was left with a pile of clothes to sort through, ruffling her hair in frustration.
“What should I wear? Should I dress up?”
“It’s gonna be people you know, wear what you want.”
“But Eren, I want us to fit! What are you going to have?”
“Uhm… Jeans and T-shirt I guess.”
Mikasa scoffed at his uncreativeness, her eyes rowing through the dresser. She was feeling goth tonight, in part because she knew that it will make Kiyomi roll her eyes and complain about that style, but mostly because it was something she wore often and was very comfortable in. But it was hard to fit with Eren in those clothes since he was
so uninspired when it came to style. Mikasa didn’t think about it that often, but now after spending so much time in the model agency, she knew enough to try and make them match.
Fingers tracing one of the black shirts, she pulled it out, realizing that it was way too big. Eren’s then, one she stole and put into her own dresser for nights when he was working and she was feeling alone. He never did mind that, loving the way his shirts covered her curves and ended in that perfect spot located at halfway of Mikasa’ butt. Watching it, a new idea popped into her mind, one that he was not going to like. At all.
Obvious of his impending fate, Eren staring into his phone, sitting on the bed and not doing the logical thing. Like trying to escape. He ignored Mikasa when she walked to the bathroom to gather her supplies, he ignored her even when she sat down on the mattress next to him. Only once she cleared her throat, he put the device down.
“What’s up?”
“Babe, I have my first birthday wish.”
That was fast.
“Sure,”, he said, “What is it?”
With a sly grin, Mikasa held up the lipstick she brought in the small pile of make-up.
“I want to dress YOU up.”
“The what now?”
“You! I want to pick your clothes and do your make up for the party, so we fit together.”
Eren’s eyes slid over to the lipstick, then to the eyeliner on the bed, and then to Mikasa’s excited face.
“No.”
“But…”
“No, I’m gonna look like a clown.”
She arched an eyebrow.
“Are you saying that I look like a clown?”
“Tsk, of course not, you pull it off flawlessly. But there are certain differences between us two.”
“Such as?”
“Well,”, he reached over to touch her cheek, “Your skin is really pale, so it creates a nice contrast to the black makeup. And your hair is midnight too, making it fit together. I’m tanned and brown-haired, there is no way I can look as good as you do.”
But Mikasa wanted to do this, she really did, so it was time to start playing dirty. In one fell swoop, she was in Eren’s lap, anchoring herself with hands that wrapped around her victim’s neck. He was caught - both physically, because if Mikasa wanted to she could probably keep him in place with her thighs alone considering how strong her legs were, both also mentally, because when you have Mikasa Ackerman in your lap you don’t move and you don’t breathe. The moment is too magical to be true.
“Please Eren,”, she pouted, deploying all of the weapons in her arsenal, “It’s my birthday….”
In a last-ditch effort, Eren opened his mouth to say no to her, only to find himself attacked by her lips. And as Mikasa aggressively kissed him, the “No” inverted into “Yes”, and she had won. So Eren suffered through the eyeliner, he suffered through the lipstick, he suffered through the nail polish. After that, she picked some black shirt and pants for him, completing the image that she often wore. Done with him for now, Mikasa told him to wait so she can get herself ready, giving Eren the time to look in the mirror. Yup, he was right in his assumption, he was looking like a clown. Ymir, Jean and Onya are all going to have so much fun once they see him.
Yet when he saw Mikasa, saw her smile and heard her giggle, when she looked at him with the crinkle in her eye, Eren couldn’t care less. She was happy, she was having fun, and that was the most important thing. After all, it was her birthday.
Maybe to reward him for going along with her plan, Mikasa dressed in a way that made him truly appreciate the beauty that she was. Nothing overly complicated, black top and skirt, and fishnet stockings over her usual combo of thigh highs and combat boots. Maybe to tease him, her outfit had some leather belts here and there, snaking around her body, reminding him of the bondage harness she sometimes wore during their playtimes. Mikasa must have reached deep into her pile, because she even had a netted top on, over the shirt, a thing Eren hasn’t seen on her for some time now. It complimented her usual choker and all the necklaces, as she wanted to evoke her style as much as she could because Kiyomi is probably going to lose her mind over it. The top and skirt left a strip of skin uncovered in the middle, bringing a pair of her toned abs into view, a sight Eren simply loved. Okay, he looked like a clown, that was given, but Mikasa was pulling it off flawlessly as always and she was the main event of the evening. It was her birthday, after all. He can survive the humiliation. Hopefully.
And then they finally made it to the Third Wheel for Mikasa’s birthday party. Everyone was already present, making their arrival fashionably late.
“Do you see what I see?”, Jean gasped, eyes wide.
“I can’t believe it.”, Ymir admitted.
“Somebody pinch me.”, Onya said, “I’m dreaming.”
Ymir did so, pinching him with much more strength than required.
“Ow!”, he complained, rubbing his cheek
Ymir shrugged, giving him a nondescript look.
“What?”
“Shut up, both of you.”, that was Connie speaking, appearing from somewhere inside the bar, “And soak it in.”
And they all did. Because seeing Eren, the arrogant Eren, the always smug Eren, with black eyeshadow and nail polish, dragged behind Mikasa who was having the time of her life, that was an event they were sure to remember.
Kiyomi was the first one that the pair met, once again accompanied by Yelena, her faithful shadow.
“I didn’t know that you will make it!”, Mikasa chirped, holding onto Eren’s arm and more or less forcing him into the spotlight next to her, “But I’m so glad you’re here!”
“Yes, I couldn’t miss it.”, Kiyomi’s eyes roved all over the pair, her mouth forming that thin line that appeared whenever there was something she disliked, “But did you have to do this to me?”
“Oh, but I often dress like this, and so does my boyfriend we love this style,”, Mikasa squeezed Eren’s arm, “Isn’t that right baby?”
He was already feeling the stares on him, on his nails, knowing that all of his friends were having a blast. Probably taking pics too, judging from the commotion. It is Mikasa’s birthday, he reminded himself, this was her wish. She. Is. Happy.
“Yes, totally.”, he lied, putting on an awkward smile for the old lady, “We love dark colors, sadness and all that jazz.”
The disappointed frown didn’t disappear, but the old woman didn’t grill him any further. Kiyomi and Mikasa got into a conversation about topics Eren had no idea about and Dot Pixis also appeared, joining the pair. With his other half currently engaged, Eren’s eyes, hidden in those dark shadows Mikasa painted on them, turned towards the other people present at the birthday party.
Eren silently dreaded this moment, when he will walk up to his friends and try to look cool and unbothered while wearing that makeup. It was going to happen, sooner or later, so gathering his courage, he did just that, approaching the group that noticed him almost immediately. Even his mother was there, chatting with the group, and very badly hiding the laughs that his appearance forced out of her. Sure mom, laugh at your only child. Do it.
Taking a deep breath, Eren spoke up.
“Hey, guys, what’s up?”
And the dam broke.
“Eren, who died?”
“Did they cast you in The Crow remake?”
“Are you cosplaying a failure in life?”
“Evanescence needs a new singer?”
Overwhelmed, he held up his hands to stop them.
“I get it okay? I look like a clown.”
“I don’t think you do.”, Jean said, snapping another picture, “Clowns are funny, but this… We are never letting you forget this.”
“Fine, I don’t care. Mikasa wanted it, and I’m not going to say no when it’s her birthday.”
“Mikasa wanted it?”, Onya wondered, “Why?”
“Kiyomi despises the style, and Mikasa likes poking fun at her. That’s about it.”
“A prank then.”, Connie nodded, exchanging a look with Sasha, “We can respect that.”
“It’s not really a prank,”, Jean said, “It’s more of a way to get under Kiyomi’s skin.”
“Still, it’s cute that Eren is so willing to make a fool of himself only because Mikasa told him to.”, Carla pointed out, “A nice birthday gift.”
“Thanks, mom.”, Eren deadpanned, “I appreciate it.”
She patted him on the cheek.
“Anything for you, sweetie.”
His ghastly appearance somewhat explained, the group’s focus shifted towards other serious topics. The jokes didn’t stop, but now that he was not the main attraction, Eren could finally relax and engage in the conversation. Which, somehow, took a strange turn as Mikasa rejoined them, pressing a quick peck to Eren’s cheek.
“We should establish like an underground fight ring, right here in the pub.”, Sasha was beaming with energy, “And then have people bet on the fights! Imagine how cool that would be.”
“How would that be fair,”, Jean pointed out, “Mikasa would steamroll everyone.”
There was silence after that nobody spoke into, the eyes of everyone slowly but surely turning towards Levi.
“What do you want me to say?”, he asked, noticing the attention out of nowhere, “I’m old, not delusional, I’d lose to her nine times out of ten if we were both serious.”
There was a collective sigh and a victorious smirk from the birthday girl herself.
“Well, there goes the only one who had a chance.”, Connie said.
“Maybe Mikasa should be disqualified.”, Jean offered, not giving up yet, “Since she’s a pro and all that.”
“That’s not very nice.”, Armin interjected in her defense.
Still, Jean’s comment made her frown.
“Scared, Kirstein?”
“Hell yeah I am, I’ve seen what you did to those guys during preliminaries.”
Mikasa mumbled something, leaning on Eren’s shoulder for mental support against such an accusation while Jean retreated to a safe distance behind Hitch. He still remembered the Thunder Spear. The conversation flowed after and while the idea of a fight ring was exciting, everyone agreed to that, the idea was put on ice for now.
The party continued with the guests once again breaking into smaller groups. Eren got stuck in a conversation with Armin and Hitch, who was trying to unravel the psychological reason for his makeup. Mikasa let him out to dry for once, heading to the bar to get a refill on her drink. Halfway there, she was tackled by a small cannonball, who she only identified because of the blonde hair. Krista was buzzed for sure, her cheeks were ruddy and the eyes that dug into Mikasa were all excited over nothing.
“M-Mikasa! Kasa! Listen.”
“What’s up?”
“I need to ask you something.”
“Shoot.”
“We want to do the… the thing with Ymir.”
“What thing?”
“You know the… the….”, Krista’s flushed cheeks were turning even redder now as she struggled for words, “playtime?”
“Huh..”
Detective Ackerman was on the case. Krista was blushing, she didn’t want to talk about it much yet brought it up. It must be connected to the time when Eren came over and … Oh!
“I get it.”, she said, making Krista beam up now that she won't have to spell it out.
“But what do you want from me? It’s going to be about you and Ymir.”
“Yea but, how do you do it. Do you like point at your feet and say: Kneel, slave! and Eren obeys?”
“Not always, it's much more about the moment. Don’t stress it that much, I’m sure you two can pull it out.”
“Ymir can, but I want to be the one on the top.”
“Oh,” Mikasa blinked a few times, “You?”
“Yes, is that strange?”, Krista looked away, biting her bottom lip, “Maybe I should give that up and let her..”
“No,”, Mikasa interjected, “don’t do that, don’t put yourself into a position you don’t like. “
She took a gentle hold of Krista’s chin, turning her to look back into her eyes.
“There is nothing wrong with that, nothing wrong with you wanting to try something new. You being comfortable is the most important thing. Whatever you want to try, go for it, because even if you fail it will be you and Ymir who knows about it. You’ll laugh and move on, there is literally nothing to lose.”
Krista’s face lit up as Mikasa spoke, and then she was on her, hugging her. She staggered, taken aback by the sudden affection. Even after letting go, Krista still clutched to her arm, smiling up at her.
“You’re like… the coolest person I know.”
“You’re drunk.”
“Maybe, but it's still the truth. We watched your fights, and while Ymir was staring at your ass, not that I blame her, I watched you move and you’re so amazing!”
“Uhm…”, Mikasa wasn’t sure what to do, “Thanks?”
Krista was in on it, her face beaming when she continued.
“You go like boom, kick and pow, punch and…” she imitated the moves, kicking the air, “another, and another and…”
On her third punch, Krista ran out of luck and Levi happened to be passing by - he got hit right in the face. The seasoned veteran that he was, Levi didn’t even flinch, looking over to the pair with a raised eyebrow. Calmly, he asked.
“What. The. Fu…”, Hange told him not to swear so much, “-Hell?”
“Oh my god.”, Krista covered her mouth, eyes widening in alarm, “I’m so sorry!”
Levi exchanged a look with Mikasa, who was barely keeping the laughter in, some of it still simpering through her dark lips. It felt strange, getting punched by Krista, as if it happened already, somewhere in the past.
“Did you ever hit me before?”
“What? No! Of course not, I’d never.”
“Hmm…”
Krista was saved from further questioning by Eren, who picked exactly that moment to bring the cake out. Everyone gathered around while he lit the candles, taking a step back to let the birthday girl take her rightful place.
“You have to wish for something!”, Armin reminded her.
But she had everything. Her friends all around, her fiancé at her side, everyone she cared about was happy and safe and most importantly alive. At that moment, Mikasa felt a surge of happiness alongside a tinge of sadness. Whoever the Mikasa in her dream was, she never got to experience this, and she felt sorry for the poor thing. She had everything, while the other girl had nothing, only because she was born into such an unfair and cruel world.
“I hope that you will find happiness at the end.”, she whispered under her breath, “I wish for that.”
Puckering her lips, Mikasa blew the candles, acing it on her first try.
“Never have I ever… had sex in a public place.”
“What, you didn’t?”
“Some of us have decency, Ymir.”
The freckled girl groaned, downing the shot before nudging Krista. The blonde was blushing like crazy, but followed her girlfriend’s lead, surprising exactly no one. Who else could Ymir be indecent with? Carla passed, but Sasha drank, leaving Mikasa as the only one to react. What a stupid game.
She didn’t even know how she ended up here, sitting at the table with the other girls, while Eren was having some sort of deep discussion with wasted Jean and Onya. The party had already progressed past the healthy hours, meaning that most of the other guests already left. Even Armin called it quits, citing that he had an important call with a publisher tomorrow. It was just them now, playing a drinking game, and Eren with the boys, arguing over something stupid.
“What’s the holdup?”, Ymir barged into her thoughts, “Can’t remember?”
Oh, she could remember, very vividly too. The restaurant bathroom, the public park, the beautiful view where Eren had her spread over the hood of the car…. She drank, making Carla blink a few times as she looked at her, then to her son, then back at Mikasa. Blushing, she refused to meet the older woman’s gaze.
“Okay,”, Ymir saved her, “You’re next Carla.”
Her eyes, so similar to Eren’s, narrowed, as she drilled them into Mikasa.
“Never have I ever,”, she said, “had a piercing.”
The jab so obviously aimed at her made the raven scowl, but she drank. Luckily not alone, as Ymir also took a swig, much to Sasha’s surprise.
“Where?”, she asked, making the tall girl mumble something and look away.
It was Krista who answered the question, tapping the center of her breast and giving Sasha a wink. That was a surprise to Mikasa too.
“You turn Krista.”, Hitch noted.
“Never have I ever… had a tattoo!”
This time, Mikasa also had to drink, much to Carla’s satisfaction. Sasha did too, earning a raised eyebrow from Hitch.
“I have a butterfly on my ankle.”, she explained before turning to Mikasa, “Miks, you’re up!”
Maybe Mikasa could get back to Carla’s good graces if she implied something nice about her son, instead of the fact that he was a bit of a sexual deviant. Not that Carla knew even a fraction of the things he and Mikasa did together. But slightly drunk Ackerman wasn’t the best thinker, so she blurted out the first thing that came through her mind.
“Never have I ever faked an orgasm.”
A wave of groans ran through the seated players. With a sigh, Sasha was the first one to drink, followed by Hitch. Seeing them cave in, Carla also took a sip. That was supposed to be it, but then Krista, totally red in the face at this point, also drank, making Ymir’s eyes widen.
“Babe! What the hell?!”
“I’m sorry, it was only one time!”, the short girl pleaded, fingers grasping on her girlfriend’s shirt, “I was so tired and out of it, but you were trying so hard!”
“A small white lie can be good for your partner's sexuality.”, Hitch chimed in, “If it helps the other party feel better it has a positive effect on their overall psychic state and the level of comfort around you.”
Ymir frowned at her over Krista’s blonde head.
“That’s why you did it?”
Hitch shrugged, having her reasons.
“Male ego is fragile.”
They all drank to that.
A few meters away, the guy group was trying to show the perils of his new gig to Eren, who was playing the perfect boyfriend, irritating Jean to no end.
“It might get hard, all this faithful shit you keep pulling.”, he was saying, making Eren tilt his head in question.
“What do you mean?”
“Well,”, Onya explained, ”since you are going to be a model and all, you are going to have some girls going after you.”
“So?”
“You know….”
“I know what?”
“Side chicks? Fun on the side? Flings? I mean…”
Onya looked to Jean for help, and luckily the taller guy stepped in.
“He’s talking about other women that will probably want to have sex with you. There, you understand that?”
Eren’s eyes lit up.
“Oooh, you mean cheating! Nah man, I’m good.”
“You are saying that now, but you don’t know what kind of hotties you will attract.”, Onya continued, now that Eren finally understood his angle, “Never say never.”
“Yea,”, Jean followed that up, “What if you get bored of her?”
“Bored of Mikasa? How?”
“What if you guys have a big fight?”, Onya continued.
“Then we will talk it out.”
“What if you wake up one day and realize that you don’t love her anymore.”
Eren actually laughed at the absurdity of the question, shaking his head.
“Not happening.”
“Look, she’s hot, we get it, but there is always a possibility.”
“Nope.”
“So what, are you going to sit here and claim that Mikasa is perfect?”
“I don’t know about that, she has plenty of faults. But she is perfect for me, my ideal angel.”
“You’re hopeless.”, Onya surrendered, “I give up.”
Yet Eren was still not done in his rant.
“To be honest, I don’t get cheating in general.”
“Dude,”, Jean groaned, “What the fuck are you talking about?”
But Eren pressed on.
“I mean, you have someone that loves you, and you risk it all for a way to get off? Can’t you rub one out and call it day?”
Jean exchanged a helpless look with Onya, who shrugged. Seeing no support there, he looked back at Eren, who was casually sipping his drink.
“I wondered if Mikasa had you neutered, but this confirms it. You can’t say shit like that and want me to believe that you have any balls left.”
“Are you that interested in my balls?”, Eren’s eyes narrowed, “Maybe you want to take a look down there?”
“Somewhat eager to shove your crotch to my face. See, it’s strange that you were never bothered by how strong Mikasa is, by all the muscles, the short hair too. But I think that I cracked the code.”, Jean pointed at Eren, smirking, “Look at you, with the eye shadows and nail polish. You’re fucking gay in denial, bro.”
Onya snickered, Eren snorted and almost stood up before a familiar hand with black nails appeared, snaking around his waist in a very possessive hold.
“You boys having fun?”, Mikasa asked, her voice in that icy tone that made everyone present shiver.
“Yes ma’am.”
“Great party.”
“Happy birthday. Again.”
Onya and Jean spoke over one another, nervous smiles all around while Eren sat back down, wondering what they were so afraid of. Sure, Mikasa could freeze people with her glares, but they were still acting a bit over the top. What he didn’t know was that Jean told Onya all about the Thunderspear, so now he was nervously checking Mikasa’s legs, all the way from her powerful thighs down to the blackness of her combat boots. Look, it wasn’t that Onya was scared of Mikasa, but hearing that she can kick hard enough to make a man feel like half of his body was blown off, is a cause for concern for anyone valuing their wellbeing. It made even Onya, with his dark skin, look pale in the face.
With nothing else to say and not feeling like repeating the gay joke now that Mikasa was here, Jean and he took their exit, leaving the pair alone. Now with no one to bother them, Eren was free to wrap his hands around Mikasa’s hips and pull her down to his lap, an offering which she took ignoring the empty chairs left behind by his friends.
“So, are you having fun?”, she purred, playing with the ends of his hair.
“Considering that on your last birthday party I was in a chastity cage, I take this as an improvement.”
She sighed at the memory.
“Damn, that was great, especially what followed.”
“I agree, you let yourself go wild back then. And god, it was amazing.”, he squeezed her sides lightly, “You are an amazing dominatrix when you feel like it.”
A tiny smile curled her black lips up.
“Thanks, you are not half bad yourself.”
“I’ll treasure that compliment, mistress Ackerman.
“As you should, master Yeager.”
Both giggling at the completely unnecessary formalities, they kissed, ignoring the party completely in favor of getting lost in each other’s lips. It was a great birthday, but the biggest gift was this. Being here with all her friends, with her fiancé, all of them safe and happy. It warmed her to no end, making her so overjoyed that she didn’t mind when Eren’s hands discreetly descended to her ass in a public place like this. To top it off, Mikasa didn’t even know that Eren had one more surprise up his sleeve.
It didn’t happen until much later, when they left the Third Wheel and took a cab that, Mikasa assumed, was supposed to get them home. She spent most of the ride with her head on Eren’s shoulder, eyes closed. When they got out, she was surprised to realize that this was not their house. Instead, they were standing in front of another establishment, a club if she was to guess.
“Another club? I don’t think I want to drink anymore babe.”
Mikasa didn’t like getting hammered, and she was already tipsy. But Eren was quick to diffuse her worries.
“No, this is not that kind of club. This is… Eh…”
It looked unassuming, just a door with a bouncer in front, the same as any other place in the city. But for some reason, Eren was scratching the back of his neck in an obviously nervous gesture.
“This is a performance club, sort of.”
“Like a theatre?”
“Well..”, he barked out a nervous laugh, “not really.”
She poked him in the shoulder.
“Tell me.”
He took a deep breath, looking her straight in the eye.
“It’s a BDSM club, and there is a performance tonight, so I booked us a booth.”
“You mean like…. Like….”
“Yeah.”
Seeing the pink that dusted her cheeks and the unsure look in Mikasa’s eyes, Eren continued.
“Listen, we don’t have to go if we don’t want to, I just thought that it might be interesting to see a pro at work. I know the guy who’s going to perform tonight.”
“You do?”, now that was something Mikasa didn’t expect, “How?”
“It’s the guy from the store, Darius Zackly, you know him too. When I talked to him a while back he gave me some great tips about rope bondage, helped me figure out a few things. He’s partly the reason why I am so good with it now.”
Mikasa could agree with the good part, Eren always delivered an incredible experience. She looked at the club, then back at Eren’s face, then back at the club. What was there to lose? It’s not like she and Eren were some vanilla couple that would get scared from what they would see in there. And it could be fun seeing other people engage in similar fun that they had.
“All right, let’s go.”, she decided, grabbing Eren’s hand and pulling him, “I don’t mind getting wild on my birthday.”
The bouncer let them in with no big fuzz, and Mikasa pulled Eren through the door and into the strange yet exciting place.
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Disappear Here - 4/4
A/N: Hi friends, I hope you enjoy this little finale. Please don’t kill me - but I hope you enjoy. Again, I recommend the acoustic version of Disappear Here by Bad Suns to set the scene! As always, feedback is welcome! xx
Based on this blurb (because I’ve gotten a few questions and realized I never really explained it - this blurb is in the present and everything else is in the past).
Pairing: Javier Peña x reader
Word Count: 4.3k
Warnings: language
MASTERLIST
PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3
ALTERNATIVE ENDING
SEQUEL
»»————- ♡ ————-««
“You’re telling me, Agent L/N, that you want to withdraw your request for a transfer-”
“Yes, ma’am-”
“The request that has been granted and you’ve accepted-”
“Yes, ma’am-”
“Because you now want to stay in Colombia?” although she kept herself together, mostly anyway, there was nothing but annoyance in her tone and written all over her face. Annoyance and daggers that was. You were sure your face must have been a brilliant crimson as she berated you; all you managed to give her in response was a small nod, “you realize what you’re doing, correct? I sure hope you do.”
“Yes, ma’am,” you stared at your feet for a moment before daring to meet her eyes. Noonan sat back in her chair, arms crossed over her chest as she let out a sharp exhale through her nose, “I-I realize how much of a hassle I’ve created and I do apologize - to everyone.”
“I sincerely hope that you’re not changing your mind all because of one man,” you almost stopped breathing at her words, wishing she wasn’t always so spot on. You did want to stay in Colombia and finish what you started, but there were…other reasons too - you just weren’t about to tell her that. Clearing your throat awkwardly, you shook your head, trying to convince her as much as yourself, “I suppose it’s not my place to wonder or figure out your logic. Whatever is compelling you to stay, I hope it’s worth it.”
“It is,” you told her confidentiality, putting a small smile on your face. It was going to worth, it definitely was. You wouldn’t be doing this, shaking up everyone’s lives yet again, if you weren’t so sure of that.
“Well, I guess I’ll tell Agent Breslin not to expect you,” her voice was cold as ice and sent a chill down your spine, despite the warm Colombian afternoon. You remained rooted in your spot as you tried to figure out something to say; it felt wrong to just silently remain there as she shuffled her papers and appeared to be looking for something. She gave you the up and not after a few moments before snapping, “you’re excused, Agent L/N. You might as well go and do some work since you’re so keen to stay here.”
“Yes ma’am,” you turned on your heel and quickly darted out of her office. The tension broke as soon as you entered the hallway and you finally felt like you could breath easier. You knew, you just knew without her even having to say anything that you would be on her shit from now. Oh well. You’d just keep a low profile and work hard. Try being the operative word.
When you made it back into your shared office, you were almost relieved to find it empty for once. You leaned against your desk and let out a long sigh, closing your eyes and relishing in the silence. But your peace and quiet was quickly ended as a pair of footsteps approached, stopping in front of you. For a moment you thought it was Murphy, he had been suspicious about your sudden change of mind, but hadn’t questioned it too much. He knew, you were sure of it, and if he didn’t know exactly why, he had strong inklings. The little looks he kept giving you and Javi gave him away.
You slowly opened your eyes and found Javi’s honey brown ones staring back at you, a crooked smile on his face. He reached up and put his hand on the side of your face, running a thumb gently over your cheekbone, “hi, sugar.”
“Javi,” you looked around to make sure Steve hadn’t somehow made his way in just yet. When you realized you were alone, you took his hand and placed a gentle kiss to his palm. He grinned at you before capturing your lips in a quick kiss. Your eyes widened at his audacity before the two of you broke into a small fit of giggles, “I told Noonan.”
“I’m sure she took that extremely well,” he cringed slightly at the mental image of that conversation. If he could have avoided her forever, it wouldn’t be long enough. He was by now means her favorite person, and he was well aware of that fact.
“About as well as you think,” you sighed, moving to sit down on your desk as Javi gave you a small smile, “she knows. She totally knows.”
“We’ll just be careful,” he promised and you nodded. If she had so much more than a mere hunch that you two were actually in a relationship, or anything, she’d have you back on the first flight to the states, you knew at that point your career would be all but over, “I promise nothing bad will happen.”
“If she finds out then my whole career will be over before it’s even really started,” you looked at him with raised eyebrows and he nodded. At least if something happened to him, he’d already established himself well enough not to have to worry about anything. You took his hand and playfully pushed him back towards his own desk, “so this - us, means we can’t do this at work, you cheeky bastard. Paws off until later.”
“But honey, you’re killing me-”
“Hey, did you two want to go and get lunch? There’s nothing good anywhere here,” Steve asked as he walked back in, nose buried in some papers. You and Javi quickly tried to play off anything that had been happened, pointedly looking away from each other, “if we leave soon, we can meet Connie. I know she’s dying to see you, Y/N, ever since she found you’re staying.”
“Lunch sounds great,” you both chimed in at the same time, causing Steve to look suspiciously between the two of you. So much for being subtle.
“What’s up with you two?” a small smirk it’s way on his face as your face grew warm and Javi looked anywhere but his face. If he didn’t know before, he knew now, “well come on then, let’s get going.”
He started to head out the door and you and Javi followed close behind. You narrowed your eyes at him, and stuck out your tongue at him, “you’re gonna get us found out, Javi!”
“Don’t worry, I’ll make it up to you later,” he smirked quietly, giving your ass a quick smack causing you to yelp lightly. Steve paused for just a moment but didn’t turn around to face either of you, instead he just kept walking, shaking his head sightly. He fucking knew.
“Javier!”
»»————- ♡ ————-««
Javier grinned at you as he pushed a piece of hair off of your face, letting the tips of fingers trace over all the highs and lows before stopping at the corner of mouth. You gave him a lazy smile before a yawn escaped your lips.
“Tired?” he teased as he draped an arm around your waist and pulled you closer to him.
“Wonder why,” you asked as you rested your head on his chest, listening to the beating of his heart slow back down to a normal rate. It was late, away later than you should have been up considering that you both had to be at work in the morning. But once things had started, they were hard to stop. And it wasn’t like you were particularly eager to stop anything when it came to him, “maybe you shouldn’t be keeping me up so late, Peña.”
“I don’t hear you complaining,” he was proud of himself with that little comment, as you jokingly scoffed at him, “unless oh Javi, Javi please, more, more, harder, is your way of complaining.”
“Shut up asshole,” you groaned as you buried your face into his chest. As soon as he had his way with you, as soon as he had he had his hands on you, you were lost to him and whatever coherent thought you had left was out the window, “you’re the worst!”
“Only kidding,” he promised, putting a finger under chin and lifting your face up to meet his, “I love you, you know.”
“I know,” you bit your lip as you studied him, still somehow managed to feel shy despite how intimately he knew you, or how often he reminded you that he loved you. It was different than what you just experienced before with your past lovers. He a combination of hard and soft, a duality that worked well with your fiery nature. You nuzzled your nose against his and just stayed there like that for a while before whispering gently, “te amo, Javi.”
“Look at that, you’re practically a Spanish aficionado now,” he teased before pulling the blanket over your bodies so you could attempt to get a few hours of sleep before work, “aren’t you glad you gave me a chance? I told you it’d be worth it.”
“Oh yes,” you laid back down and Javi automatically pulled you into his body, “I’m so glad I put everything, my career, my future, on the line for you-”
“Hey now!”
“I’m just kidding, Javi, lighten up,” you traced your fingers his bare chest as your felt your eyes growing heavier and heavier with the call of sleep, “I’m very glad. I’m glad every day. Sometimes I wonder if you’re worse off. You had to change everything, and only have me. Who’s the real winner here?”
“I would choose you and only you every time,” he whispered back, causing a smile to grow on your face as you finally shut your eyes completely, “you were worth it.”
»»————- ♡ ————-««
Present Day
“No,” you shook your head fervently, trying your best to keep your angry tears from spilling down your cheeks as you looked between Steve and Javi, You didn’t want to cry and knew it wouldn’t help your cause, but you couldn’t help it. All you could see was red, “absolutely not. You’re not leaving me behind again.”
“Y/N, please listen to reason. Carrillo said this was dangerous-”
“I don’t give a shit what Carrillo thinks!” you stomped your foot for added emphasis.
“You did before!” he reminded you.
“That was then. This is now and I am ready for this. I’m sick of you leaving me behind,” you crossed your arms over your chest as you glared at Javi. You couldn’t believe his nerve, that he was trying to get you left behind yet again, “this isn’t fucking fair.”
“I don’t care if you don’t find it fair,” Javi raised his voice and Steve looked anxiously between the two of you, “it’s too fucking dangerous.”
“That’s not for you to decide!” you insisted, throwing your hands up in exasperation, “I am a grown woman, I am your partner, and most of all I have proven myself over and over to everyone during the last seven months. You all know that.”
“I said no,” he insisted through gritted through, his nostrils flared with anger. You knew if it had been anyone else asking to go he would have said yes. You knew he was only doing this because you were together, because he valued your safety more than anything else. But it still didn’t make it any easier, or less obvious that you were actually together. If you hadn’t been in this particular situation, you would have taken advantage of the moment - there was something about Javier when he was angry that turned you on. But not today. Not with this.
“It’s not for you to decide,” you insisted, glaring back at him with just as much as annoyance as he was giving you, “this isn’t all about you, it’s not always just Team Javi. It’s the three of us. Right, Steve?”
“I’m staying out of this one,” he said as he raised his hands in defense and took a step back, shaking his head. You rolled your eyes and sighed, “whatever you two have going on, you need to figure it. And fast.”
“Some fucking help you are, Murphy,” you couldn’t believe he was just backing out of this, “I’m going and that is final, Javi. I can take care of myself.”
“No,” he said quietly and shook his head, “you’re not. You’re staying here and that is final. I’ve already told Noonan and Carrillo and anyone else involved that you’re not coming. And if you do come, you’ll just go right back to the States, you’ll be done.”
“Are you fucking kidding me!?” you couldn’t help yourself as you shoved past him, making sure to slam into his shoulder as you did so, “you’ve got some nerve, Javi. How could you do this? I’m ready to come.”
“Honey-”
“Don’t you dare call me that right now,” you sighed as he tried to follow after you, “you can’t just sweet talk your way out of this.”
“I love you,” he tried and you just groaned at him and flipped the bird. You didn’t even bother to respond to him as you stormed out of your office in search of something - anything, else.
“So, that’s a thing, huh?” Steve looked at him with wide eyes as he looked between Javi and the space you had just occupied. Javi let out a long sigh as he nodded, leaning against his desk, rubbing his tired face, “I think you should let her come. In all honesty, I think she’d be fine. She can handle herself.”
“She’s not going, Murphy,” he insisted firmly, “that’s final. I don’t want to hear another word about if. From anyone.”
They had left shortly after, without you having said another word to the two of them. It had caused your stomach to churn because you kept wondering what if. What if something happened to happened to Javi? Or Steve? And the last tie you’d ever said them was basically a fuck you?
»»————- ♡ ————-««
Luckily, nothing of the short had happened. Javi and Steve had come home in one piece. But things were different. Everything felt off - wrong.
Javi had been back for several days after being gone for several even longer weeks. Since he’d been back, he’d been quieter, more stoic than he normally was. So much unlike the man you had grown used too. Even when he held you, kissed you, or did anything with you it felt so odd. Almost like you were with a completely different person.
You hadn’t pushed him to speak, or explain anything; you knew how stressful his job could be: the long days, the sleepless nights, the horrors that meet your eyes on the daily. You, after all, shared the same occupation as him. But unlike him and Steve, you hadn’t been allowed to go on this mission, despite your pleas, so you had no clue exactly what they’d seen.
No, instead, you had been behind and become a glorified pencil pusher once again, working on menial paperwork. And hung around the phone, waiting for any call, no matter brief from Javier. And he called on occasion, filling you in on everything that was happening with him and Steve. If you were lucky, he’d spend more than five minutes with you and remind you, in a hushed tone, that he missed you and loved you. But it was different…less real.
But now he was home, back in your life on the daily, but it seemed like he might as well have been gone still. Your Javier had left you, and a mere shell of his former self had returned, someone you didn’t know anymore.
“Javi?” you asked quietly as you sat down next to him on the couch. He had been nursing a single beer for several hours, staring blankly at the television as he only made a comment here and there in response to your questions.
“Mhmm?” he asked without evening you looking at you. You sighed heavily and turned off the television and he finally looked at you, and unreadable expression in his eyes.
“Where are you, Javi?” you put your hand on his cheek, running a thumb over his soft skin.
“What do you mean?” he asked, his brows knitting together, an unreadable expression n his face, “I’m right here.”
“Your body is,” you agreed, “but your head hasn’t been. You’ve been quiet since you returned. It’s like you get lost in your own mind. Where do you disappear to?”
“Just…tired,” it was a clear lie, and he seemed mildly annoyed. You wondered if you should press the issue and decided you would; you’d been silent long enough. You were done dealing with this empty shell. You wanted your Javier back, the one you had so desperately loved.
“Javier,” you removed your hand from him and crossed your arms over your chest, “don’t lie to me. What’s wrong? What happened while you were gone?”
“Nothing,” it was a firm statement and offered no room for negotiation.
“Javi-”
“I said nothing was wrong.”
“And I want to know why you’re lying,” it was a challenge. He should have known better than to argue with you by now. He stood up and ran his hand through his hair, an exasperated look on his face.
“Y/N, just drop it,” he insisted, but you weren’t about to back down now.
“No, Javier, I won’t,” your tone increased in volume, “because you’ve been back and you’ve been treating me like garbage. If something is wrong, tell me, and we work on it together. We’re supposed to be team!”
“I said drop it!”
“No, I’m not going to. Now tell me what’s been going on!”
“I cheated on you,” it was declared without emotion, and it washed over you like a cold wave, crashing down hard. The air was suddenly so thick and tense that you could have cut it with a knife. The words just kept repeated on loop in your head, “are you fucking happy now?! That’s what’s wrong!”
“Get out,” you couldn’t even bring yourself to look at him. Of all the things in the world you had expected, this wasn’t one of them - he had promised you… He hung his head and sighed, unmoving, “I said get out.”
“Y/N-”
“Get out!” you shouted as you grabbed the vase from the table and threw it at him. He ducked and it shattered into a million tiny pieces, just like your heart, “get out! I never, ever, want to see you again.”
“Y/N,” he tried to reason with you one more time hurt you weren’t having it.
“Walk out that door and never come back,” you pointed sternly before turning around and hiding your face in your hands, tears steadily steaming down your face, “I never want to see your face again, Javier. Fuck you and get out.”
»»————- ♡ ————-««
The next morning you’d somehow managed to drag yourself into work, despite feeling like hell. You had wanted to call in and let them know you were sick or whatever lame excuse you could come up with but you didn’t want to give Javier the satisfaction, or whatever he was after.
Before you knew what you were doing, you had stared gathering your things from your desk and stuff them all into an old banker’s box you had found lying around. You were on autopilot and nothing even mattered.
Not until he walked in.
You didn’t know what you were expecting, when you saw that he looked just as bad as you, it sent a pang of sadness through your heart. You thought you would have been happy with the sight, but you couldn’t muster up the energy to be spiteful or angry. Nothing mattered - he didn’t matter. You weren’t sure if that make things better or worse.
Before you knew what you were doing, you stormed over to his desk, causing him to instantly look up at you. His eyes were puffy - bloodshot.
“Was this the first time?” he remained silent as he avoided looking at your eyes. No. It was enough to bring your whole world crashing down around you.
“How many?” you asked and he instantly knew what you were talking about. Of course he did, “how many fucking others were there?”
“Honey, let me just-”
“No,” you cut him off, feeling the tears already welling up in your eyes as you stepped out of his reach, “you don’t get to call me that. Not anymore, never again. You could at least have the fucking decency to be honest with me. This was going on the whole time? How could you do this?”
He didn’t answer you right away, instead hanging his head as he breathed heavily through his nose. It was at that point that you felt your heart shatter into a thousand little fragments, yet again, as the tears spilled over and down your cheeks.
“I asked you for one thing,” you reminded him as you dabbed your eyes. The little break in your voice was enough to make him want to cry too, “one thing. It shouldn’t have been so hard. I gave up everything for you. A move, a whole new career step, only to stay here and be held back and cheated on this entire time.”
“Y/N-”
“No, I’m done,” you turned on your heel and heard for the door, leaving your box of things. You stopped just before you exited, turning back to give him one last look, “I want to hate you, and a part of me does. But I hope to God you remember this the next time you tell someone you love them. If I ever see you again, it’ll be too soon.”
You didn’t wait for him to say anything else before storming out, almost running into Steve. He looked bewildered as you just shook your head, before wrapping him in a right hug, “goodbye, Steve. I’m going to miss you and Connie most of all.”
“What happened?” he asked as you pulled back and just gave him a teary smile, “Y/N?”
“I hope our paths cross again one day,” your voice was soft as you walked away from, heading down the hall in search of Noonan’s office.
Steve jammed it into the office and found Javi sitting at his desk, head in his hands, “what the fuck happened?!”
“I fucked up.”
“Yeah,” Steve sat down at his desk with a heavy sigh, “you did.”
»»————- ♡ ————-««
“So, you’re telling me, Agent L/N, that you’re once again asking for a transfer to Mexico,” it was hard, so hard, to keep yourself composed and not let the tears steam down your face. You didn’t want to embarrass yourself or give her the satisfaction of seeing you cry.
“Yes ma’am,” your voice was shaky, and it almost cracked. You felt more like a boy going through puberty, rather than a grown woman. Although in the moment you felt more like a silly child than anything. But you could only blame yourself; your biggest weakness became your greatest undoing.
“You realize the strings I had to pull ten months ago to try and you the position over there,” her voice was laced with venom, and in all honesty, you couldn’t even be mad at her. She had a point after all, “and when I had to tell them you had changed your mind.”
“Yes ma’am,” you answered, hanging your head as you stared at your scoffed up sneakers. You weren’t even dressed properly for work, hell you’d barely managed to drag yourself out of bed to make it to work.
“I’ll go and see what I can do. I hope you realize that these types of things aren’t done on one’s whimsy. These things take time and if you’re lucky, they’ll be able to take you.
“Yes ma’am.”
“You’re sure about this?”
“Yes ma’am,” you swallowed the lump in your throat as you nodded at the ground, “and if it’s that much trouble, I…I can go back to the states.”
“Is that what you really want?” she asked and you paused for a moment. Was that what you wanted? To just give up everything you had worked so hard for because of this? She noticed that you were silent you, so she carried on, “you were just starting to make a name for yourself. To give it all up now would be a shame.”
“Yes ma’am.”
“So I’ll see what I can do. I’m sure you’ll be able to do well in Mexico,” she stated and you nodded lightly, “I’ll place a call to Agent Breslin and see what he has.”
“Okay,” you said quietly, dabbing at the back of your eyes with the sleeve of your sweater. You’d tried to prevent the tears from spilling over, but it was getting harder and harder. You figured by her silence that you were allowed to leave so you started walking away, figured you’d just go home. Nothing else really mattered anymore.
“Agent L/N,” you turned around at the sound of your name and waited for her to go on, “I hope it was all worth it.”
You didn’t even bother to respond as the tears flowed down your cheeks. She knew exactly what she was saying, and the words were cold as ice. You said nothing as you slammed the door shut.
You can’t give her the satisfaction knowing that none of it was worth it.
Javier Pena had not been worth it.
»»————- ♡ ————-««
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