#is that sp is a younger version of kdj

[jankillbride]

anyways yeah no scenarios lgy murder au is the main orv au I have cooking rn. depending on how orv turns out I may or may not have another based on my original idea of secretive plotter

[orphiclovers]

You know that part where OD looks at KDJ like he's a monster. And on the flipside, 1863!YJH runs from SP. I honestly don't know whether if this is disjointed and if it's coherent, but...

oh you just made me think of something. if you want a nice contrast how about this one: kdj's vs yjh's approaches to meeting another version of themselves.

Kim Dokja meets the Oldest Dream, himself but younger, who is a weak and pitiful child who begs him not to hurt him. But Kim Dokja is so horrified and full of self-hate that he tries to kill him(self), despite literally everyone else thinking twice about it. because he can't extend even a little sympathy to himself, even an innocent child version (because of who that child grows up to be.)

Vs. Yoo Joonghyuk talking to the Secretive Plotter while he's in The Orb. Himself but older, yet who looks like a little kid currently. who acts the diametrically opposite of OD. The Plotter says 'don't pity me' and tells of a small boy who he saw dying a thousand times in the next train carriage, as an example of someone whose deserving of pity, not him. Then he says that he would accept death by Yoo Joonghyuks hands in that moment.

And instead of accepting that, Yoo Joonghyuk thinks, 'did that boy make the same expression as this man' !!! DIRECTLY CONFLATING the two - innocent boy and adult man. Because there is no difference!!

Kim Dokja's scene says the same, only the fucked up mirror version. Kdj thinks, 'this innocent boy (od) is the same as the adult man (kdj), so therefore he's just as guilty and deserves to die' while Yjh thinks 'that inoccent boy (on the train) is the same as this adult man (sp), so therefore neither deserve to die' In both of these kdj&yjh are confronted with child versions of themselves at the mercy of their sword, and they have to decide whether to kill them or not. It's an internal conflict made very literal.

Both Kim Dokja and Yoo Joonghyuk HAVE to recognize themselves as capable of being undeserving of pain and death, by looking at these pitiful versions of themselves. And well.

Yoo Joonghyuk, at least, does do that, to the shock of SP. And you know what SP responds with? 'You've been greatly influenced by Kim Dokja, it seems.'

...Kim Dokja saved Yoo Joonghyuk but couldn't save himself...

Sidenote: theres more interesting stuff with the deaging mechanic orv employs as an allegory. just look at all 3 all-powerful gods of the universe - sp, tls123, and od. all three of them are powerless in key ways and deliberately are made to look like/are children