#is making my brain go nutsy koo koo | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

woneuntonzz · 9 months ago

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what's it like to love ? 𓇢𓆸

anton lee x afab!reader (part 3/5)

• part 1

• part 2

• part 4

• part 5

warnings: cussing!

genre: fluff -`♡´- highschool love

word count: 3k words!!

౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ description: student athlete!anton x studious class officer!reader | you swore to yourself, to you friends and even to your parents “I'm not one to easily fall.” and you thought you were that tough, not until him of course. [note!!: hiii i'd just like to quickly say that this is my first ever post ever and i'm still a bit insecure with my writing, and english is not my first language so bare with me now 🙏 open for any forms of feedback please do take note that i will take longer to update/respond to anything because of school, thank you!!! ]

[Days 2 - 4]

Friday and Saturday flew over you like a breeze. You've convinced yourself time and time again during those two lengthy days of him not being around was not gonna be a problem for you at all. You were definitely happy to see him, you wanted to see him, but you didn't need to.

Though you yourself thought you were doing a great job of making it seem like his absence didn't bother you at all, Xen, Sohee, and your other friends could see right through your thin, glass barriers.

“You're gonna see him again by the end of the week anyways, so what's the big deal?” it was lunch time, you sat with your girlfriends —including Xen— and it was Minjeong who had spewed an attempt to lighten up your mood.

“Yeah I guess so. I feel so crazy right now, you have no clue.” your voice was low, almost like a mimicry of his voice.

“Uh, yeah, we see and hear crazy very clearly.” your friends laughed at Xen's banter whilst you remained seated there with a downturned smile being slightly pushed around by your guffawing friends.

You couldn't help but just laugh at the other-worldly noises coming from your friends. Yeah, it's not a big deal. I'm fine, I'm happy with my friends beside me. —you thought to yourself as you looked at your friends with so much warmth in your heart.

“But in all seriousness, I kinda get you too, you know. When my crush is not around I go nutsy-koo-koo all of a sudden, but then I see you guys and I'm like, I don't need him.” Liz had her arms crossed, a cheeky expression melding onto her face towards the end of her sentence.

“Wait, you basically just said that Y/n has a crush on Anton now too.” Everyone gasped at Danielle's words.

They playfully touched you around, one of them twirling your hair in her fingers and the other wrapping an arm around your shoulder and lightly squeezing you

“Do I?” Is all you could reply as you stared into the left-over food on your tray.

“Girl, just eat, we'll finish discussing this later —you need your nutrients!”

Anton did stay true to his words. He messaged you that Friday night, and by Saturday, he was messaging you during his breaks too.

If your past self from two days ago saw these messages now, she would've put herself into rehab. The thought that you seemed to be falling more and more each day too quickly crossed your mind, but it was merely a fly buzzing around in your brain. Needless to say, you were truly just going with the flow.

————— ୨୧ —————

You would soon find yourself in a group vc with Xen and Sohee who were both in their own homes, waiting for Anton to message you again. All three of you had workloads to finish, your school was quite the fiesty one making sure to leave their students with a week's worth of schoolwork and studies before going on to say “enjoy your weekends.” and watching as the students dragged their tired and anxious asses out of that school.

“Anton has had a crush on you for a long time now. Are you even still just a crush to him?” Sohee was in the process of writing a hand-written essay when he spoke, still concentrating on making his handwriting comprehensible at the very least.

“Well, he did say he likes me. Isn't that an entirely different thing?” you reply, also busy paraphrasing and typing down information for an infographics project.

“You said he mentioned that you're his 'long-time crush', right?” Xen was just smiling at the two of you once she lifted her head up from what she was doing.

“Well it's all just words. The word 'crush' is used for everything nowadays, right?” Sohee was quick to turn his attention to his girlfriend, interested in what she has to say. “Some guys would say, 'Oh, I have a crush on this girl.' but could barely care about the girl —but what I'm trying to say is, the word crush doesn't really lay flat at a certain degree, whether it be just infatuation or true love.”

You found yourself nodding hearing the reassurance from your friend.

“Mhmm~ that's true. I have a crush on Xen and I am madly in love with her.” Xen laughed at Sohee's remark, making you smile at the sight of the two, just being in love.

Xen has always been a sort of anti-male, with the exception of her boyfriend and other men she trusts within her circle of friends and family. You ended up developing the same feelings after a lot of boy troubles throughout middle school to your freshman year. One of your most cherished memories was when you got played by a boy who swore to you that you were his everything, saying "I love you." from the very first day and continuing to talk to other girls throughout the entire time he was trying to get under your pants. Of course he was unsuccessful, and so he broke up with you, called you useless even. Xen comforted you and begged the classmate who sat next to you to switch seats with her for a while so she could be right next to you the entire time.

“You know, men can be very disgusting. Never think about that fucking asshole again, okay? He's not worth even a second of your thoughts. There are a lot of good people in this world, and they will always find their way to each other, like perfectly fitting puzzle pieces. You're a wonderful person Y/n, and someone just as kind and truthful as you will come finding their way to you.”

These were Xen's words that stuck to you like a virtue. You learned to be patient and to just enjoy life as it is, trying to improve yourself day by day. You were young after all, so if Anton turned out to be insincere, it's not the end of the world.

“Oh wait, Anton just messaged me.” Xen and Sohee snapped their heads at you.

“Oh, so should we invite him in or—”

“No, no, just keep doing what you're doing. I'll go now, thanks for everything guys, I love you both so much!” you were quick to interrupt Sohee, but the tempo of your speaking was a lot quicker, enough for the couple to pick up on what was going on.

“Yeah, okay, enjoy your talk with Ant!” you heard Xen coo at you before you left the call.

You fixed your stuff, putting it all away neatly and tidying up your study table before jumping onto your bed and resting your back on your bed's headboard with your legs stretched out.

You had a weak smile on. Anton had long days of training, while still having to catch up with the school workload for the sake of maintaining decent grades. He was definitely more tired than you were, and you felt like it should be the other way around, that you should be the one to soothe him.

Well of course you were completely unaware of it, but being able to talk to you was enough to bring his mind to peace. He needed nothing more but to be able to converse with you about anything and everything.

Your laughter turned into you biting onto your bottom lip, your cheekbones flying up as you suppress a squeal. You gave yourself a mental slap in the face and figured you're getting way too ahead of yourself. You listen to Arctic Monkeys quite often, so you figured you could use them as an excuse to hide your agitated state.

You gulped, lips pursed as you waited for his response. You anxiously watched the typing status, waiting for it to disappear and for Anton's message to pop up.

Your smile dropped a bit, but you understood. You've established respect for each other's boundaries, and you didn't want to break something so precious like that.

The conversation went on for quite a while, and once it ended, the two of you went on to stare at your ceilings, glee and excitement rushing over your bodies —glee from the the things you two talked about and the inside jokes made along the way, and excitement knowing that you'll both be seeing each other the next day again, finally.

————— ୨୧ —————

You were in the car with Xen, Sohee, and Xen's mom; Mrs. Park. Your eyes wandered everywhere on the streets as the car moved.

“Did Xen tell you that she and Anton were in the same orchestra in middle school?” your eyelids moved further apart when you heard what Mrs. Park just said.

“Orchestra? Anton was in an orchestra?” Mrs. Park giggled at your confusion.

“Yes, he's quite the cellist.” Mrs. Park held a grin, eyeing you from the rear-view mirror.

“Wow. I didn't know that. I never would've guessed. I thought he's just always been a swimmer.” you uttered in awe, gradually becoming quieter as you progressed with your words.

“Well I wouldn't be surprised. Anton isn't very out-going. He doesn't approach people much, but people approach him.” The endearing tone in Mrs. Park's voice was enough to indicate that she's quite fond of Anton. “Do you like him?”

Your posture stiffened from hearing Xen's mom ask you the very question you've been asking yourself for the past few days.

You spent months trying to build even the slightest bit of connection with this boy, and within those months you yearned for a reason as to why he avoided you like you were the biggest threat to his life. At some point, you started wondering, were you yearning for the truth or were you yearning for him? The answer was vague for you at that time, but now, you are so close to coming to terms with what you truly feel.

“I —well, I don't really know yet.” you released an unusual amount of breath as you spoke and you saw Mrs. Park reading through it like a book.

“Anton confessed to her, mom, and I'd say they're doing pretty great.” Xen excitedly clapped like a seal turning to her left to face her mom.

“Oh, is that so?” you nodded your head slowly, feeling a bit shy. “Are you two talking now?”

Your conversations for the past few days started to fill your mind. You felt the blood rising up to your cheeks as you went over every emotion you felt while talking to Anton. You told Xen's mom every detail about how much bolder Anton got when messaging you contrary to him struggling to hold eye contact with you without blushing.

“I believe I know both of you well enough to assess this situation.” followed by a long and soft hum, Mrs. Park searched for the words to express her thoughts about your situation. “You two are gonna be very happy. Of course, life has its ups and downs, I know both of you know that very well already, I just wish for the two of you to never forget that the downs are temporary, and it's where we grow stronger, where we learn.”

You adored the way Xen and her mom conveyed their feelings, how even if you've heard the same words, the same advice over and over again, they never failed to console you.

————— ୨୧ —————

With your arms linked with Xen's, you started walking to the main entrance of the stadium, Mrs. Park and Sohee followed closely behind. Your eyes followed the people going in and out of the stadium, and as promised, you messaged Anton when you got to your seats.

Anton's face lit up the moment he saw your message on his notifications. He looked over towards a specific row of seats he had told Xen and Sohee to take you to, and so he found you right away.

You tried to look for him around the stadium, head turning from left to right every minute or so, but you just couldn't spot him. There were too many athletes with a similar stature and physique.

The corners of Anton's lips rose to a bashful smile as he watched your head move at an irregular rhythm trying to look for him.

“Who are you smiling at?” One of Anton's teammates nudged at him.

“Oh it's nothing, I just saw my friends.” Thankfully his teammate did not care enough to question him further.

The competition would start soon enough and you would find yourself, mouth hung open watching the swimmers with astonishment. You've watched snippets of the Olympics back then, some you would only stumble upon on Tiktok, it never failed to amaze you with just how fast their pace could go.

Now you are seeing a match in real time, fists balled up from unadulterated joy. You're thankful that Anton wanted you to be here, and you couldn't wait for his turn.

Sohee and Xen bickered, picking out swimmers who they thought would place 1st in each category, their picks always opposing each other. You and Mrs. Park on the other hand, just watched and clapped at every heat.

You were looking around at the stadium taking in the spaciousness and the surrounding lights when Mrs. Park placed a hand on yours. “Anton will be out soon.” she whispers into your ear.

You kept the same smile you've been wearing since the match started, but your spirits were lifted to seemingly dramatic levels. Your eyes focused on each athlete in every heat, and when you finally saw Anton, he looked right at you. It was a bit too far you to see, but he had such an adoring smile on his face as he saw the stadium lights reflected by your eyes giving him a sweet gaze from afar.

It happened twice, thrice, for the fourth time, and for the last time in Anton's last heat. There was no doubt that he did incredible for this particular match, your presence causing his heightened vigor.

The match had ended, the stadium was filled with immense praise for the athletes, awards were granted, and you clapped with so much force and volume every time Anton's name was called.

Anton saw it all. He wasn't aiming for a silver or a gold —which he both got— ,what he truly wanted was for you to see him at his best. You could say he intended to impress you, but this was all really just an excuse to see you again.

You, Xen and Sohee stood near the car, waiting for Xen's mom who had gone to the restroom. When she came back though, Anton followed right behind her, carrying his bag. You welcomed him with a warm smile to which he instantly folded, hanging his head low in order to hide the warmth spreading across his cheeks.

“Anton's joining us for dinner!” Mrs. Park exclaimed, causing you to subconsciously clasp your hands together.

Anton's eyes dilated a bit with how adorable you were, everyone saw it and felt the tension between you two.

Anton sat in between you and Sohee at the back, and conversations just kept going on and on. But at one point during the car ride to dinner, while everyone else laughed and talked about some matter, you and Anton were having your own little talk.

“You're really amazing, you know.” your voice was low, but your tone was very mellow, it nearly melted the guy seated next to you.

He leaned in a bit, this time not minding the flushed state of his composure. “I couldn't have done it without you.” he replied in the same manner.

You turned your head a bit to look at him. You two were a lot closer than what the both of you thought, but not an ounce of care was given. He looked down into your eyes, staring at the shine reflecting on his own eyes.

“That's quite cliché of you.” the two of you shared a soft laugh, eyes still locked on one another.

“I know, but it's true.” his eyes hesitantly traveled down to your lips.

If it weren't for the car stopping, you two wouldn't even realize the closing proximity between you two and would have still been basking in the little space with each other's ambiance.

Dinner was a delight. You were all at Xen's house eating a meal prepared by Xen's aunt. Anton tailed behind you taking the seat next to yours at the dining table. Everyone congratulated Anton with his great success for that day's competition, while under the table, your hands were so close to engulfing in one another.

“How long have you been together?” This being the first time you and Anton met Xen's aunt, she just couldn't hold in her curiosity when the two of you remained notably close to each other from the moment you stepped in their home.

“Oh, we're not together… yet.” you laughed nervously, murmuring the last part.

Considering the intimate distance, Anton was able to catch your last breath. Though he was still conversing with the adults in the room who had endless questions for him, he had his pinky crossed over yours. You kept your eyes on him, feeling the warmth of his hand close to yours. When he finally looked at you, he got lost in the constellations that formed in your eyes, looking right back at him with awe.

Mrs. Park insisted on driving all three of you back to your own homes, Sohee being the first to depart, then you.

Before leaving though, you gently place your hand on top of Anton's, waving goodbye with your other hand with a smile that alters his sensations.

Your hand drifted from his at a painfully slow pace from which he longed for your touch the second he lost it.

It was indeed a good night.

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#riize #riize au #riize fanfic #anton lee #briize #riize anton #riize fluff #riize x reader #Spotify

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