#is he sy's big bro? is he sy's dad? yes <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[lbhslefttiddie]

I just came here to say your mott au (it was #mottau so I just guessed the au went with a space in between ಥ⁠‿⁠ಥ) has been living in my brain rent free this past week and I love so so much both the art and the fic, they're delicious and wholesome and amazing and I love the found family and the angst. I just want to express my love for all your works, they're simply masterpieces! Thank you for your hard work ❤️

hhshfdhfhgjgfasds yeah when making tags for my shit i prioritize it being unlikely to end up in an unrelated search and easy (for me) to type when tagging, thus most of my au tags are just the initials of the fic title+au (mottau, itwaau), or the initials of the barebones concept+au (svshau, literally "scum villain shadows house au"). they make sense to ME (brain twisted and awry) but i wonder if i should like. make a legend for my tags

that aside, thank you so much!!!!! hurt/comfort, or rather, the fallout of life-rending trauma, is one of my favourite things to write........ i have actually been rotating this idea in my brain for quite a while. its really heartening to know people like my weird ideas, and i hope you will enjoy what is to come!!!

[twistedcollective]

autism rambles

headcanons i yapped to a friend (@herconfuse im so sorry buddy)

theres a shit ton, some tdas but most are metal family. also these are copy pasted from spacehey, in parts cause i hit the character limit. four times. if some make more sense reading them as a dm, thats why. im so autistic about this show bro.

tw for various types of abuse when talking about glam and his backstory and family, also superrr limited mention of sh there too

theres probably gonna be another part to this at some point

tdas: - mal acted like a villain for the show bc fans enjoy drama and on my LIFE chris is rigging votes based on fan popularity and who he personally likes. so mal was just being overdramatic so he could stay on longer. two steps ahead frfr (ok nikocado pack it up /silly) - vito x anne maria. idc that the show tries to make her look bad, those two are so cute and systems can date different people bro - mike x zoey, obv, but also svetlana x zoey. shes poly for her partner sys ur honor. also, bi zoey. and super supportive singlet zoey. idk i love zoey sm shes so sweet - dawn is pagan, probably works with gaia or some other version of mother earth - cameron is autistic as hell bro thats not even a headcanon thats basically canon atp. that boy has so much tism in him - B is transmasc (yes this is tdroti not tdas. shush.)

metal family: - i think dee listens to white girl music sometimes - he picked it up from ches, who would blare 2000s white girl bangers to annoy his mom during fights - gustav has been to prison and had his record cleared via shady payoff to the govt - mary was married to gustav via some sort of arranged marraige (possibly a forced taxes and traditional conservative values thing cause he absolutely would [i hate gustave with a passion]) - gustav died believing that glam got fully possessed by the devil during that one scene - glam gets nightmares about his dad and/or about becoming like his dad and hurting his wife and kids. his sleep schedule is still ass to this day - nobody knows the full extent of glam's childhood, not even ches - ches probably assumed glam's scars were self inflicted due to location, and he hasnt asked to clarify bc he doesnt really know how - hes absolutely noticed tho - lif and dee consider the rat their adopted son and his theme song is rats by ghost since they both canonically like that band - heavy prefers the metallica version of enter sandman, dee likes the ghost cover better - vicky listens to viking metal and aggressive sea shanties - glam would love chappel roan - ches would love sabrina carpenter - dee would unironically like taylor swift and would tell NOBODY - dee is not only a brony (canon), but also a furry. he has a fursona and a ponysona - dee would be a reality shifter but he doesnt believe it exists - dee does NOT like cats. heavy absolutely loves them. lif likes them, but also draws gore of them (not in an edgy way but she thinks the biology is neat and has an art style where it works) - lif sits in graveyards in her spare time

metal family part 2: - heavy is a theistic satanist, dee is an atheist (canon), lif is an atheistic satanist but likes theistic satanism quite a bit, glam is an atheist, vicky is a norse pagan, ches is in tune with the universe and just calls himself "spiritual, not religious" - dee writes fanfic - i love headcanons where dee is just an absolute fucking nerd cause its SO ACCURATE bro that boy is a GEEK - dee knows the basics of chemical warfare from his chemistry phase - he could and absolutely would nuke someone if he had good reason

metal family part 3: - dee is a controlled pyromaniac - dee steals from big businesses and never from small/independent ones, he taught heavy who only steals food (candy, drinks, etc) bc anything else makes him feel guilty - dee has a spacehey account - hes also very active on the dark web, and holds a paywall on hacker services for people - he has sent things to people who wanted him to hack for shitty reasons. by things, i mean animals. not alive ones. also, small pipe bombs that arent quite deadly but will still hurt pretty damn badly - dee will jailbreak people's school devices, for a fee - hes such a con artist except hes not cause he actually pulls through - his stalker thing with lif was purely genetic, idk how but it was (see: glam stalked vicky too) - both relationships are super healthy tho dwdw - heavy cant work the internet without dees help, but is very active online where hes allowed to be - dee is a dipper personality type, heavy is a mabel personality type, and lif channels bill cipher without the,, yknow,, pure insanity - that one pink haired girl whos name i cant remember is super nice but super sheltered from alt subcultures and queer people, think caitlyn from my creative writing class (ik you dont know her)

metal family part 4: - lif had a dsmp phase and was an e girl in 2020 - she also has a scene phase shortly after - goth isnt her only style but its def her main and shes super good at the makeup and also the dancing - heavy would pierce someone for enough money - dee would give people tattoos at school for money, but he refuses to do stick and poke so he cant (doesnt have a machine) - lif draws art commissions online - dee and lif are both huge creepypasta enjoyers and have loads of ocs - heavy knows the basic ones (jeff the killer, toby, ben drowned, etc) - heavy and dee would write and produce films with shitty production quality thatre somehow really good and post them on youtube - dee takes college level classes and is aiming for his two-year by graduation (omg look its ollie projecting onto his fav characters again) - glam is pan, dee is demiromantic ace, heavy is straight as a fucking board, vicky is straight but was bicurious at one point cause lesbians absolutely love her (anna has a one sided crush one her rip), ches is gay but doesnt date much anyways, lif is bi with a preference for girls (although technically she has a preference for dee) - lif had a pink and girl phase in elementary, complete with the justice and claires stuff - lif is a demigirl (our lif is transfem i think iirc)

[istherewifiinhell]

reading process: chapter 177 (I have been putting off this post cause i can tell im in the good shit and its all so thematic and delightful but if i dont make it now i never will and it will be a super segment next time)

Reading highlights (i cant read my own writing edition!)

157 now in a dad spotting mood. kdj encouraging sys about her grades

yoo mia(!!!) teasing yjh about kdj. yjh facial expression truther (looking happy when speaking about kdj)

the 3 fates use big data?

kdj WILL be killed by the person he loves most!!! (mostly wrote that down to indicate my gleeful cackling)

158 LGY baby boy baby. kids and breaks!

Kdj and Jhw are such bitches to each other i love them

reinheit.... von lohengramm yeah okay got it buddy

oh ur 800 years old it would be some bullshit like that

rvd is sooo handsome. at least 2 yjh

a permanent institution cannot exist. yes kdj i love u kdj

161 kdj doesnt date. fateful meetings ONLY. okayyyyy

jhw emotional sword moments. kdj famed peptalks

LGY: dad ABANDONED US LJH: uh. okay -> sibling mischief ensues

162 ACAB

Hankim girls trip weekend

(this note is atemporally placed) KIM DOKJA LOVE

164 the absolute good constellations are cowards

kdj peptalks Always come in clutch

165 oh to be carried by ysh as she descends like a beautiful woman

167 The kids!!! stay strong!

breaking the sky sword this was the road of the sword that broke the sky -> kuzcos poison

168 crying at this wounded monster and also themes and metaphors

yjh and kdj are the same with there cryptic plans (this was nearly illegible)

168 kdj moral rethinking disease (yjh has it)

AH! AH! Double identity stuff. name sharing. doing something nice for the guy that has scrambled your brains.

169 jhw describing ysh beauty -> smth you would like to share ma'am?

lgy the good child he is being like. hey. non het romance love exists. hell yeah little dude. poggers as they say

-> (crying because he cant think of a reason kdj should love him) NOOO his emotions are too big for his little body

yjh: i do not want to find out the answer to this question GOODBYE

ah. the speed run dress. i see

170 if you read it again. it will definitely be a different story. god. okay. okay. jesus. okay

hsy power: you cannot create the semblance of a human without it in some way. being human

ah. his mom again. it just could be that way

"its the most complicated relationship in the world" cheers bitch

172 just rolling in kdj and his mom fight

i could have sworn you used up that sky disk 100 chs ago but whatever

173 Gasp. garlic eating

"i let u die to save ur dick bro!!!"

20 years. jesus

OH FUCK MEET THE PARENT TIME. oh my god

yjh: kdj will be my compainion mom: arent you like a horrible person? Yjh: why is your family like this

double whose gonna kill our guy twist

175 yjh: i guess you mother doesnt like me. -> is that a JOKE. are you cracking a (gay tinged) joke to cope buddy?

176 "It was a distance that could be crossed, but I could never reach her. It was the same in prison and even now. this had become our distance"

guh. hes gonna listen. even if it hurts. even if it changes him

IM GOING TO ATTACK AND DETHRONE GOD

dohyuk moments against a backdrop of cthulu ass boss fight

kdj can look cool as hell when he wants to i guess damn

Cheok Jungyeong: Solidarity Forever 🎶

"i wont let you die" AHHHHHHHHH

rotating: oh god i specifically was trying to group this segment for parental vibes and themes and now my brain is mush. i need a second notebook maybe... (rereading a bit) okay something like. obviously. goes without saying. kdj is the most unreliable narrator in the world. and clearly there is more to the story, she was literally about to say it before... god stuff. but ill just note out the things i was grabbing so far. the question of how to raise a child in the apocalypse. clear with lgy and sys (like extra extremely so). and lesser with ljh. often kinda. throwing them into the fire. (or a hole. with no explanation. thanks yjh). but also supporting them (literally the incarnation stuff. cant remember where line about 'one persons gaze can mean live or death' but yes. yeah). contrast. kdj mom with the childhood environment and the tone. i think its like. kdj is almost mad about the wrong thing. but its the hurt he has. not the one he may about to have. even if hes wrong about what his mother did (i literally dont know!!) well. it has to be said.

oh also the mother constellation! theres a fun parallel there. i mean. this is of course the novel of fun parallels but still. its um. weird ctuhul twitch stream version of making a deal with the devil (in the pale moonlight -> star trek ep that also has a guy get a guy to kill someone for the good of a state. huh)

also there was dokkaebi preschool. that just seems worth mentioning. and even dokkaebi egg sys

[ogeeitsme]

What's your experience with dormancy?

TW: Sui// mentions / comparisons / death comprsns- this is both positive n negtve b aaa

This is a long post so I’m srry <:^/

Theres 2 ways 2 answr this: how we second hand experience it, n then how we experience it in our systm:

How we secondhand experience it

Turns out, more than once, apprntly, drmncy has actlly been used as a, threat?? DKDJDKN we got som rlly old memories abt Jamie meeting a “System” (idk if they’re a sys, it’s such a long story) n He used drmncy 2 guilt trip her (n she ddnt even kno what systm was @ the time dkhdbddb)

Anywy besides that HUGE outlier, it’s kinda,, rough, bc ur askin 4 our experiences, not our views, so when it comes 2 secondhand drmncy, as in like other systms not us- it’s alwys hard

N it’s RLLY funny ur askin this rn anon bc coincidntlly we just came out of a WHOLE frickin sitch that involved secndhnd drmncy experiencs (again, I mean watching ppl in other systms go dormant)

Like, Jamie’s prev ex had, ppl go dormant, like a lot of em, bc they broke up, n 2 of their mmbrs bsclly sent me wht can be equivlnt 2 a sui note- n I got that note frm bsclly som1 equivlnt 2 my brthr, @ the time, n Sal’s brthr [@ the time] bc they shared the blog

We r rlly close 2 anthr sys whose host wnt drmnt 4 som big rsns (they also have trauma abt ppl using drmncy as an escape route frm their actions, man life b wild huh?) n jst came back so that was rlly wild n hard bc she was (n is) like a mom figure 4 us, esp 2 Peter, n their whole sys, bc they’re median, kinda crashed in on itself tmprrly n it was rlly hard 2 watch KDH it makes u kind of mad @ those ppl who cause othr ppl 2 go thru sm pain thta they jst go drmnt u kno?

But rounding back 2 Jamie’s ex (n I g the 1st exmple 2 b vaguely), that was rlly hard, n bc of that, drmncy is smth we can’t unsee as death anymr

Hey so disclaimer that won’t b in the tags (Bc som ppl dnt read them) n I will pit here just in case: yes we kno dormancy is NOT equal 2 death, dormancy always has the chance of them coming back, b w how we spcfclly exprncd these, it felt that way, esp w the goodbyes, n the crying, n how they litrlly treated it as sui//. Not 2 mention the Older trauma Jamie had/has where His “systm” litrlly said “do u miss him? Well he’s dead now”

It’s hard 2 uncorrel8 them- bc it dpnds on how u go thru it- and anthr disclaimer is that if it’s a drmncy in ur own systm, the brain may b able 2 visualize it as a death, heck som systms we kno have a “graveyard” where all the drmnt systm mmbrs end up in; and of som jst “disappear” n I heard anthr sys in their headspace it’s seen as like pods? Where u can c them sleepin?

Anywy back 2 us- KDNDKNDKN yea, our experiences w it so far has been rel8d 2,,, sui or death :^( not counting the ppl we pass by in random srvrs who talk abt it, this is jst our prsnl ones esp tied 2 systms we were (or r) RLLY close 2

IDK we’re still grieving over Larry n Asriel frm Her systm. Pls don’t send asks saying “they mite come back” btw KJSKHS they mite b even if they do we can’t Talk, their sys is an ex 4 a rsn

Inner-system exprnces

HM so there’s a lot 2 write here b we dnt- uslly have ppl who r nice, go drmnt

It used 2 b only all the very bad persecutors who wld rlly harm every1 who wld go drmnt, our psychiatrist even said, 2 calm Jamie dwn a long time ago when she was given anti psychotics, that the “good ppl wnt go away, only the bad ppl”

b they (those old persecuted) all went drmnt thru,,,,, d//ath, n I dnt wnna talk abt that or how, this is not how we wrk anymr

Then we have Deanne, she was a persecutor who was chngng 4 the bttr, b it’s like,,,, when she realized she didn’t have 2 b bad anymr? She went drmnt?? Like I rmmbr (I wsnt there but u kno shared memory) every1 feeling she slowly faded away until we realized she wsnt arnd

Aftr that, we stoppd having drmncies, b we do label ppl who mite b close 2 drmncy msbmdb (edit: nvm, I rmmbrd Alven n Peyton who went drmnt :^( we miss them, Alven was Matt’s dad n Oeyton was a rlly good ISH )

Bc they’re “not needed” N LISTN anthr disclaimer, by THAT I mean natural dormancies? Not 2 say u go drmnt randomly, I mean that sometimes som1 isn’t active enough or their role isn’t needed as mch,, it’s scary I kno, b it can hppn n it’s no1’s fault, it’s not even their fault,i t jst happns, n that my good anon is a bite sized expln8ion on y u mite have ppl come out of drmncy mhsbkdbdkb

Uhh, we have som ppl who r afraid of going drmnt tho ofc,, n they r trying 2 b as active as they can in sys inspace so they dnt fade

Bc if u dnt wnna b dormnt, trying 2 b more active can hlp!

So,,, we a,so have ppl who came frm drmncy,,,

N that’s Jade, Beia, n Chompy

Apprntly Jade n Beia were frm arnd the same time? Actlly it’s fnny bc we thought Jade was a split of Noelle b we were bamboozled bc it wasnt the case

N then u have chompy,,, which is rlly sad,, bc she cnt rmmbr the year b we found out it was frm arnd 3 yrs old,,, that rlly sucks- she’s a fictive of Chain Chomp n came out of drmncy in a new form (Chompette) smdbndb according 2 Jade n Beia they dnt rmmbr wht hppnd, b it’s like they fell asleep n woke up again

N w Chompy, she explains it as like, , she was a chain chomp, n was chained 2 the back of the headspace, n bc she accepted she cldnt do anyth, faded in2 drmncy bc she gave up? B now she’s back n wants 2 fite,dkbdmdb until, stuff I wnt get in2

I’m not done KDH

Lastly I wanna talk abt,,,, how we feel abt it

I dnt think drmncy shld b smth 2 b afraid of— BUT @ the same time it’s OK 2 b afraid of it, or 2 h8 it, or 2 feel ANYTH abt it bc, almost all the time it’s not ur own choice 2 do so (half the time, based on what we’ve seen, etc)

Sometimes, ppl will c it as a mmbr fnlly resting, sometimes it’s sudden n @ least in the mmnt (or mayb ull never kno), ther dsnt seem 2 b a strong rsn on y it hopnd

Som will c it as death, som will say it’s scary, n som accept it’s a part of being a sys,,, that this happens, n that it will b ok

Bc,,, they can come back, mayb, n that’s sys life

4 us we feel ALL of those @ once

I wnt lie <:^) 4 som oldr mmbrs, we hope they dnt come back, b then 4 som we hope they do com back, n it’s this balance of trying not 2 b toxic-positive n trying not 2 erase the hope if we do wnt them 2 com back

IDK it’s so— mssy Bc u shld allow urself 2 grieve- bc dormancy CAN feel like death (frm an obsrvr?), n o man the syscourse that exists @ the mere mention of treating drmncy like death? Scares me, n I jst wnna put it out ther that it involves a lot of grieving somtimes,,,m yes, it can b traumatic depending on how said dormancy was brought 2 ur attention or knwldge

4 us we’e still grieving over that last mssg frm them, we’re angry 4 those who went drmnt n also @ Them who went drmnt? Idk man

TLDR don’t- I repeat- do NOT,,,,, treat drmncy as the answr

If ur in a systm out ther, I kno it hard, n frick, drmncy is such a complic8d topic in systems period, b drmncy is not the answ

Bc yes drmncy is not prmnnt 4 som systms, (n by prmnnt I mean that sys mite jst not have awakenings as common @ all; every sys is diff) b drmncy is,,, most of the time a scary thought 4 systms

It’s- it’s not sui litrlly, b,,, it;s,, is almost similar IF- n I repeat- if it’s used as an escape, esp in a bad way

N like w sui// we wnt entirely blame you if @ all, b it’s sad- n it’s hard

Bc like ”irl” ppl arnd u who care r affctd- n knowing it’s by ur own hand is hard 2 accept

Bro, anon my dude, I’m so srry this is such a messy post KDNKDND our exprnces w it is so recent n it’s SUCH a complic8d topic 2 discuss w/o fear of ppl yelling @ u abt spreading misinfo

We’re a rlly big outlier 2 the usual sys exp w dormancies bc we’ve had SO many exprncs of it being rel8d 2 sui/ of death from othr systms Onesides our own), n it’s not jst random systems, it systems who we were close 2 n we got hurt by

I dnt wnna talk abt whether or not what we experiencs was real b yea thats our experiences n not the resources,, since that’s the question KNS

[setsailroyalpirates]

[Highlights] Club KBS x Dal.Komm - Open Mic 170315

-  JW asked the fans to clap again bc they were too out of it to clap properly after hearing Angel live. lol

-  JW: How do you feel perf Angel live for the 1st time? SY: Excited and nervous; meaningful to sing like this in front of fans

-  JW: Your fans are all so diverse and young, so pretty! M: Yes, our fans tend to be on the pretty side :)

-  It's Moon's first time in Songdo since elementary. Used to get gukbap and go camping w/ his dad but its changed a lot since

-  The "Angel" we know is adapted from a song SY made 7 years ago!

-  JW: 2010 SY vs 2017 SY - Which do you like better? You seem to miss 2010 SY...

- JW: What about Moon? (2010 Moon vs 2017 Moon)

- JW: You released Dark Chocolate on 2/14 right? And you wrote it yourself. | M: Yes, it's a song I wrote abt 4 yrs ago. Listening to (Dark Chocolate) now, it's so sweet it makes me cringe.

-  JW: How is a "regular" chocolate girl different from a "dark" chocolate girl?

-  Around 19:28 she aska them abt their time on Season 3 of a Band Audition pgrm... They crack up. Bc obvs, they have never

-  Switch topics: Why do Moon and Syoon look so similar? Are they bros? (t/n: I'm srry this interview is awks and a lil sad XD)

-  Moon-Syoon #RPfamily

-  Now they're talking 'bout how SY is always the first to LOL whenever Moon makes a stupid dad-jokes.  Apparently Moon and Syoon have a lot of inside-jokes (understandable) and Moon also has jokes not-fit for broadcast haha

- The read-card intro RP as "Visuals, Singing, Dance, Languages, Aegyo, etc. Nothing they can't do" | M: WHO'S YOUR WRITER?!

-  Is there any music you want to do or a big picture you're working towards (as two)?

-  Ah, the age-old question. What does "Royal Pirates" mean?  More root-talk: Each member actually plays many instruments! Moon started off on the drums- how did he transition to guitar? [t/n: Qs we all can answer in our sleep, prob.]

-  Plans for SooChul to release a duet (or prob an album) within the year, at least. But they ain't gonna sing u a preview. >.> [t/n: The host asked them if they could sing a bit, but they said no, obviously. There are a lot more people involved in this process than just Moon and Syoon, how could they be expected to out themselves like this. WHAT. WHO WRITES THIS THING. JFC. ]