#irl and online

[minttangerines]

Your first point about being annoyed when degraded. As this is a kink, mutual consent is needed. In real life, the conversations happen but not all the time in FF. There is only a tag for the warning and thats it. That is the heads up to the audience. Some writers even go as far to say what words will be used. You are warned before reading.

Your second point of it being done "right" is again based on what each party has decided on. With FF, you don't get to decide or have that conversation before reading. You don't get a say over what verbiage is used and that is okay. It is at the writer's discretion.

It sounds like what you prefer is more details in the warnings about how the degradation will take place and unfortunately, that is not how things are done typically. You'll get an overall idea of what is going to take place and that is it.

I don't think it's fair to villainize writers for not being more explicit in their warnings. They do still want an element of surprise and laying out an outline with details of all the kinks that will take place takes the fun out for the audience. If you come across a fic where it does mention degradation in the warnings, it might be best to do a word search of the fic before reading then deciding if you want to proceed. But you can't fault a writer for having a different point of view than you especially over a creative piece.

And your point about hate speech. Hate speech is directed at someone about their religion, race, sex, or sexual orientation. Calling someone stupid or a slut does not count. You can get sued (in my country) for hate speech. You can't get sued for just being mean.

But again, all of this comes down to consent between parties that we do not get to see in FF.

personally, I get annoyed when I read a fic with degradation kink bc if some man starts talking to me about being a slut (I haTE this one) or a whore or being fucking stupid imma have to start talking about his mama too like,,,

bc one thing is degrading dirty talk (when it’s done rIGHT) and another thing it’s sneering words that could be considered hate speech

what do y’all think?

[i-didnt-do-1t]

Be kind, please

[gojoest]

i always know when someone doesn’t like me even if they’re being nice to me out of courtesy

[starkidsimping]

i feel out of place irl cuz of a constant disconnect from people and i feel out of place online even with people who are supposed to be "like me" because even online i dont understand social cues 😭

its a stupid stupid game >:( it does not work :(

[scrambleseggy]

I think there’s something also sadly ironic about the fact people say trans men hold up the patriarchy or are often toxic when very often those behaviors are literally encouraged as “checklists to be considered a man” —

People target young trans men often in their binder stages as “transtrenders” and mock them relentlessly on the internet for being “too soft” … So which is it? Do you want trans men to be toxic manly men or do you want them to simply just be trans men? Because it seems to me even the LGBTQ+ community encourages toxic masculinity to be considered a “real man” and not an “attack helicopter.”

I just want people to digest this.

Because you can make fun of “you’re valid 🩷🩵🤍” all you want, but this is often the only place someone young could identify as trans without having to be bullied for their love of those around them who may not fit in. Some of ya’ll wanna say trans men are toxic but don’t even realize that’s exactly what you expect them to be, because otherwise, they’re “fakers” right? They’re trying to “ruin the community” right? Literally using the same tactics our parents did on us and those we even know and date through our lives…

Like c’mon ya’ll. Give me a break. You cannot tell me that the mean-spirited nature of the internet has not perpetuated these harmful stereotypes against a very specific group of young trans people for often very obvious reasons no ones willing to admit.

If you want trans men to have healthier relationships with themselves and others, maybe start breaking down why all your expectations of them fall under the very things you use to act like they don’t belong in the community.

[lostfur]

Bonjour!

Sorry if I’m popping in unannounced, but it’s just a BLU spy comin to say hello !

Hallo!! :D!!! I remember a blu spy instead of a red one in my memories- though he was British- he just had a French accent (I think).

honestly any team is welcome because I have a weird feeling we teamed up??? It’s really hard to tell.

[cxrsed-angel]

love having no friends and coming on here and seeing everyone have friends such a fun experience

[trobedistic]

made a friend on trobed tiktok recently and we've been dming each other and psychoanalyzing trobed and sending each other sneak pics of our trobed fics. life is good

[x7mafiadetective7x]

u guys have no idea how pathetic i am oh my god

[kafka-ohdear]

a shame tumblr blogs couldn't be proactively deactivated for a certain length of time

[bitchyblkqueer]

working in media is crazy because i’ll casually meet someone that i or my mutuals or friends have (deservedly) roasted within an inch of their life…..

[lewmagoo]

one thing about me is, i will call everyone babe or baby

[cupoficewater]

when someone had conservative parents and only diverged from them because they thought they were uncool but maintained all of their stupid right wing beliefs....hate 2 see it

[somewhat-very-insane]

i'm literally so good at Friendship woah

[lillyspam]

I keep ruining everything-

[lovestarr5]

i haven’t used desktop tumblr in eons and just found out that i had asks open i sincerely apologize to the people who tried to communicate with me and i just didn’t respond XD