#interactive footwear

[kaiserposting]

Michael Kaiser — Stench

PAIRING: Michael Kaiser/Reader WORD COUNT: 9k TYPE: Angst, Childhood friends, Making up, occasionally funny WARNING(S): Poverty, implied/referenced child abuse, house break-in, spoilers for Kaiser's backstory, if I missed something lmk NOTE(S): This is a two shot but I'm posting it here combined for my own convenience. The numerals show how the chapters are separated and indicates a long time skip.

I.

Someone’s coming closer and closer. It’s hard to catch Kaiser off guard — he’s sensitive to the slightest of sounds, so he can hear them approaching from behind without trouble, these sloppy footsteps slapping against the cement as if the owner is wearing really shitty shoes. He freezes with the ball still in his hands, doesn’t dare look back and check who it is, an irrational part of his brain suspecting it to be his father.

It takes a while for whoever it is to cross the distance, and then an unfamiliar voice rings, “Hey.”

Kaiser glances over his shoulder finally. You stand there, peering down at him while he’s sitting, cigarette spreading fumes in the air even though you don’t look any older than him. He doesn’t say anything to acknowledge you, though, just stares, tense and confused about your intentions.

You crouch down so you are at eye level with him. The bad smell follows, wafting by his nose and he holds down a cough on the off chance any noise might set you off and make you violent. You pull it out of your mouth and flick it away from him, apparently possessing enough decorum to stop blowing smoke in his face. “Why are you always doing that?”

“Huh?”

Kaiser knows what you mean, but he can’t help asking. After all he’d noticed you before all those times just like you’d noticed him. Every day you hang around the solitary playground at a distance while he messes around with the ball, though he never expected you’d speak to him. If anything you never pay much mind to each other.

You usually leave like you’re on some kind of schedule, but you’re up close to him now and he can see you’re in a similar condition to him — bruises and dirt littering your skin, tattered and ill-fitting clothes barely hanging onto your frame. The offenders behind your loud entrance he identifies as the torn pink fuzzy slippers he always sees you wearing, smeared with faded mud. Certainly not the most reliable footwear, but you’re in a better boat than he is on that front, what with him not wearing any shoes at all. Not his fault he outgrew his last pair, although naturally his father found a way to blame him. He’s creative like that.

“You’re always kicking the ball and punching the shit outta it.”

Embarrassed by the reasoning behind his behavior maybe, Kaiser averts his eyes. He hopes not responding will dissuade you from interacting with him.

It doesn’t work. “What’s your name?”

“… Michael.”

“So basic, but fine. I’ll call you Micha, ok?”

“You don’t need to call me anything.”

You offer your name in return. After taking another drag, you smile and ask, “How old are you?”

“Thirteen,” he says, figuring this is unimportant enough information that he can offer it without consequences until you grow bored and go away.

You grin at him and squint your eyes. The expression makes you seem smug for no discernible reason. “I’m fourteen, so I’m your senior. You can call me boss if you want. Got it, small fry?”

What an annoying attitude. He places the ball over his stomach and adjusts his position so he’s hugging his knees, this surly expression on his face. “It’s not even that big of a difference…”

“You sound so pensive when you talk. Hey, why do you kick the ball even though you don’t have shoes? Doesn’t it hurt?”

What else is someone supposed to do with a piece of trash except hurt it? Expressing such a sentiment out loud seems shameful, though. “Why are you smoking even when it’s bad for you and stupid and tacky? Why are you asking dumb questions even though you’re not getting anything out of it?”

You burst out laughing. “Woah, relax. Touchy.” When he doesn’t respond and instead continues scrutinizing you with scorn (which at this point you deem undeserved), you say, “I stole ‘em off someone. What’s stopping you from stealing a pair of shoes?”

“They’re too big to steal. It’s impractical.”

“You think small, but fair enough,” you say, before standing up, still grinning. Then you wave. “I’ve gotta go now. I’ll see you tomorrow, Micha.”

“Who said I want to see you?”

You laugh again as if his rejection is funny, but trudge on away from him. “C’mon, lighten up.”

Kaiser scoffs, pressing his cheek against the ball, tightening his hold against it. There is nothing to lighten up about.

___

Kaiser hasn’t taken any particular liking towards you, but you do hang out together every day since you approached him. He’s not sure why he tolerates your presence. Maybe because you’re resourceful — stealing is so much easier when you two coordinate. Or maybe it’s nice to talk to someone who doesn’t seem to want to strike him down and strangle him.

Currently you’re at the playground again. The lighter you use has some ugly, childish print on it. Kaiser is trying to inflate his ball with the air pump you swiped together from a shop in town earlier after you made fun of how ‘sad and flat’ it was and came up with the idea. When he hears the flicker and then registers the smell, Kaiser asks, “How many do you smoke a day?”

“One is to be stylish. Two is if I didn’t appreciate the first one enough. Three is if I still don’t feel like shitting.”

Kaiser frowns in disapproval at the moronic remark. Funny in an ironic sort of way how this lifestyle has you sounding like a ridiculous, fake adult — neither child nor mature, but something else entirely. A different category of human. He wonders if you think the same about him. “You fucking smell. How many are there in a pack?”

“Twenty,” you say after uselessly flipping over the lid, even though for one it’s not full and you already know the answer anyway, so it’s not necessary to check.

“So if you smoke three a day then you have to… steal one every two weeks?”

You scrunch your eyebrows in confusion at this assessment. “No, that’s not right. It’s like once or twice a week depending.” Then you do some weird counting on your fingers for a while. “But even if it was exactly three a week, that’s like six point six or some shit like that. Dummy.”

“Shut up, shithead,” says Kaiser, embarrassed.

“Ok.”

“Leave me alone. I didn’t think about it too much.”

“I’m not even saying anything.” A moment of silence passes until an enlightened remark comes to mind. “Hey, Micha.”

“What?”

You scoot a little closer to him. Kaiser gets nervous at first and freezes, but calms down when it seems you’re not inching your hands towards him. Though the relief is short-lived because then you take an exaggerated sniff of the air and grin. “You stink too.”

He glares at you.

The ball ends up fine. Sure, it’s still beat up and dirty as most things around him, but at least it’s functional enough to kick again, and that’s what’s important.

___

“What now,” says Kaiser with an attitude of being greatly inconvenienced before plopping down next to you on the sidewalk.

You continue counting, trying to keep track of how much money you have on you. A series of gross, dry coughs escapes your mouth. When the fit near passes, you spit on the ground as if to ease your throat, hitting your chest for good measure. Kaiser watches the display with an impassive look on his face. Eventually you turn towards him and ask, “What’s your problem?”

“I don’t have a problem.”

“Ok.”

“You’ve been quiet, not talking to me.”

“I’m gonna go get a haircut so I’m trying to see if I have enough,” you say, figuring he’s wondering about what you’re doing in a roundabout way.

Kaiser rams his head into his knees and makes some kind of noise which you can’t categorize between acknowledgement and disapproval.

You say, “Those children from the schoolyard were telling me having a bad haircut is ‘social suicide.’ Like ‘getting stabbed’ everyday. Apparently it’s the bowlcut that’s really shameful.”

“Other people have such stupid problems,” he says, irked, resentful. “I just cut it with scissors at home.”

“Yeah, man, I can tell. They wash your hair at the hairdresser though, so I wanna go now.”

“You really hang out with them? What do you even talk about?”

You shrug, pulling out a cigarette and then the hideous lighter. The smoke will waft by his nose again and irritate him. It’s unpleasant. The smell he associates with you is unpleasant, but it’s also yours so it’s kind of conflicting. “Recently I’ve been telling them I’m a ghost from the forest.”

Kaiser remains unamused the way you’ve always known him, but after some contemplation graces you with a snort, which makes you smile in return. He asks, “They don’t believe that. Right?”

“Maybe. They’ve got a what-do-you-call-it… You like football, don’t you?”

“A pitch.” He rolls his eyes as if forgetting the word is some kind of crime. Back he goes to frowning.

“Yea, they have that. You should sneak in with me sometime.” You shrug again as if the suggestion isn’t a big deal. “It’s fun.”

His nose scrunches at the thought, forehead wrinkling. It pisses him off just imagining it — truly a sickening concept. Why would you subject yourself to such a thing? Mingling with children who have nice things and an education and clean clothes and probably eat proper meals every night with their families. He doesn’t want to exchange pleasantries with people who can afford to concern themselves with social suicide. Stomach twisted in knots, Kaiser almost hurls, but somehow swallows the bile back down.

“Never,” he denies with finality.

“So dramatic, Micha.”

“Like you’re any better. You don’t care about anything. At all.”

At the sound of his tone getting more sulky than usual, you decide to spare him another glance. “Aww, are you tearing up?”

“No,” Kaiser lies, lips wavering. Unable to hold it in yet desperate to hide, he settles for covering his face with his hands, folding over himself. “I just fucking… hate this place. And I want out so… so bad.” Aside from the muffled sobs, there are also voice cracks littering his admission.

The thing is: you don’t really know what to do to make it all better.

___

Kaiser feels like he’s about to get a cramp from keeping his leg in this position for so long, lifted up and extended. Recently he stole a pair of sneakers from the thrift store, but the soles ended up falling off. Now you’re lathering everything in glue and wrapping it in tape in an attempt to salvage the situation.

“I’m not sure this is how it works,” he says. It’s kind of meek — a pathetic mumble — but you can recognize unwarranted criticism when you hear it.

“Take it or leave it.” You snap off the tape and move onto the next shoe.

When a snarky or otherwise offensive response doesn’t immediately come to mind, Kaiser resigns to silence. He continues observing you while you squeeze out copious amounts of glue. For a moment the only noises between you are those of your sniffles, the obnoxious huffing in of snot.

A few raindrops pour down, pelting your heads at the same time. You hiss when you realize your hard work is about to go to waste while all Kaiser provides in terms of reaction is a blink and a downwards twist of his lips.

“I don’t wanna go home,” you say, sounding distant, which he doesn’t hear from you much — usually there’s a lilt of amusement in your tone, some kind of playfulness lingering in all your words.

“I don’t either. It’s pointless anyway because you’ll get drenched by the time you go home and then there’s nothing to dry yourself with properly and it’s all one huge pain in the ass.”

“Right.” After signaling your agreement with his assessment, you shrug off your hoodie and stretch, trying to drape it enough so that it shields the two of you from the rain. Kaiser accommodates your goodwill by adjusting his position, scooting over next to you and cramming so he’s taking as little space as possible. It’s not an adequate cover by any means and you can tell his shoes will break apart again. But Kaiser is hugging you around the waist, resting his cheek against your neck, and you don’t have to deal with being at your place yet, so it can’t be all that bad.

___

“You look like a pufferfish,” you say unhelpfully.

Kaiser narrows his eyes at you in that way he tends to do which you haven’t seen anyone else replicate exactly. It’s kind of amusing when he does that, especially when one of them is irritated and droopy. “And you look like a spoiled apple.”

“Don’t mind. It’s a lot of bad things happening to me in that house.”

“I know,” says Kaiser.

You rub your cheek and then some more under your eye where the spots are the brightest. It makes him wince because your hands must be dirty, what with everything you two get up to in a day. Since Kaiser’s father strangles him, he’s always swollen and not so much bruised, but he thinks your parents must only leave it at punches while making up for it with enthusiasm. “I kinda like touching them when some time passes.”

“You’re sick.”

“Honestly I was, but it went away. I think I might have an ingrown toenail though.”

“No… I mean in the head.” To emphasize his point, Kaiser reaches out to probe your temple with his index finger. There’s another scratch blooming there, only coming to attention once his focus lands there, but it’s a waste of energy fixating on any of the small ones — he just can’t help but notice sometimes. “By the way, I don’t need to know what kind of toenail you have.”

You laugh, apparently finding his remark funny somehow. Then you reel your hand back before bringing it back down quickly as if you’re about to slap him. Still retaining his common sense, Kaiser flinches and tries to defend himself with his forearm. The reflex is foreign since he usually takes it lying down without moving an inch when it’s his dad.

His reaction makes you laugh harder for some reason, and you don’t smack him at all. Kaiser glares at you for your unfunny prank but you disregard it. Your hands settle around his throat instead, lightly tracing over the purple fingerprints, still fresh from last night. Almost immediately he clenches his teeth, tightlipped, breaking out into a sweat, expecting a harsh squeeze which never comes.

Kaiser wants to scold you for your idiotic behavior, yet he doesn’t. Maybe your hands aren’t for harm, he decides. And then he reaches out too, pressing his knuckle against the darkest contusion on your face. Your eye twitches closed. It turns into a strange fascination then, your skin touching his and his touching yours in places others had hurt. A ritualistic erasement.

___

You’re splitting the money again after selling off another valuable. It was some kind of fancy watch you two stole this time, more ballsy than usual. Once you pocket your share, you ask, “Are you saving up?”

“Yeah.”

“You wanna move? Where?”

Kaiser shrugs. “I don’t care. Anywhere but here.”

You hum and walk ahead of him, probably looking for one of the drinking fountains in the area.

Either compelled by unusual curiosity or bothered by your silence, he says, “You wanna make it the fuck out of here too. Where would you go?”

“To the beach.”

Kaiser rolls his eyes behind your back, finding your answer stupid. Sure, the beach is an exotic idea considering he has never been to one, but all he can imagine is the sand sticking to his skin and the gross seaweed he’s seen in commercials inside stores and such. But on second thought both of these things are probably way less gross than the environment he spends every day in. He lets out a performative huff anyway and says ‘huh’ as if to demand an elaboration.

“I wanna be free like one of those seagulls that fly over the sea. D’you wanna be a seagull with me, Micha?”

“No. That’s dumb,” he says. You ignore him. Kaiser steels his nerves for a second and, after a dry swallow, takes a step so that he’s walking next to you rather than lagging behind. Then he brushes his fingers against yours lightly before making a sweaty, half hearted attempt at holding your hand. His cheeks are warm in a way he hasn’t felt them before. “Take me to your shitty beach someday.”

You make a more competent attempt at hand holding, grasping his fingers in yours until they’re interlacing, and then you swing your arms up and down. Kaiser has enough sense to be embarrassed by this, but doesn’t tell you to stop. He doesn’t know why, but this is the kind of contact he feels the need to savor. “So you do want to be a seagull.”

“Not interested.”

“You’re such a sourpuss, Micha, never playing along with anything.”

“It’s not my fault you make it sound dumb- Well, do you think it’s any use? Hoping for something like that…”

“Don’t tell me you’re giving up.”

“I won’t give up,” he says. “I just don’t know if it’ll work.”

“Come on. We’re gonna get out of here together someday. That’s gotta work.” You lift his arm in the air next and try to make him spin like a dancer. Though Kaiser is used to standing still and limp and letting things happen to him, the attempt doesn’t come out successful. At most he does a slight twist.

“Yeah. Together,” he agrees, like a promise. He imagines messing around with you in the sand with the sun warming his skin in contrast to the perpetual chill he’s become used to. Honestly despite belittling the idea earlier, it doesn’t seem so bad in his mind.

___

Kaiser yawns while sitting next to you on a bench, eating a burger. Since you’re famous for your generosity and kindness and all (not), you decided to ‘splurge out’ by buying food for you both from some shitty hole in the wall. It’s the most filling meal you’ve had in a while. You’re still chewing when you ask, “Are you tired or something?”

He rubs his eyes. “My father was fucking making noises throwing up all night.”

“Ah, your worthless sperm donor.” You nod sagely in acknowledgement.

“Yea, him. It reeked too and when I went to clean it, there were whole chunks in his vomit.”

You scoff. “Don’t clean after him.”

“Not like anyone’s going to clean it if I don’t.” Two more yawns accentuate his sentence. You reach out to throw away the container. For a second you consider keeping the plastic cutlery and maybe washing it at the drinking fountain later, but that seems too desperate even for you. Kaiser says, “I’d take a nap right now if I could, but I don’t want to go back yet.”

“It’s sunny today for the first time in a while. Would be a waste.” You watch Kaiser while he wipes his mouth and his fingers with the napkin. The dark circles around his eyes are worse than usual. “You can lie down on me and sleep if you want.”

“Huh? Really?”

“Yea, it’ll probably be really boring, but I’ll tolerate it,” you allow, ever so charitable.

Kaiser frowns, contemplating. He’s silent for so long, you forget you even suggested anything, but he eventually shifts around and rests his head on your lap, tense. You rake your fingers through his hair. “Don’t smoke,” he warns, but it’s kind of difficult to act butthurt when you’re being so… gentle with him.

“I won’t.”

“Seriously, don’t smoke right now.”

“I said ok already.”

Now that the matter is settled, he decides to trust you and flutters his eyes closed. Though your thighs and the bench aren’t the most comfortable places in the world, to Kaiser who only knows the cold hard floor, such an opportunity is borderline luxurious. The tang of the cigarettes clings even to the fabric of your pants, to your fingers — his favorite smell. You continue stroking his scalp and he dozes off with ease within minutes. Even though he’s snoring already, he moves to wrap his arms around your knee as if he feels a compulsive need to hold onto something in his sleep.

Kaiser looks surprisingly peaceful and precious right now. You hope he’s having a nice dream if any. A long stretch of ennui is ahead of you.

___

The antics have been ramping up as of late. In your defense, you weren’t sure how you were supposed to resist urging Kaiser to break in with you when you noticed the house with the open first floor window, clearly vacant. Though at first he displayed kleptomaniacal tendencies and wanted to rummage through the drawers for anything expensive, you deemed it too risky since you had no idea when the owner would come back. And then you told him you were merely interested in taking a proper shower.

Now you’re almost dry, waiting for Kaiser to finish. You can’t remember the last time you were so free of grime. Wearing the old clothes again almost feels shameful, like a step back. You sniff your armpit like a weirdo and realize your skin smells good .

Kaiser takes a while to come out and emerges looking like he underwent some kind of magical girl transformation. He’s trying to soak up the water from his hair with a towel, sending specks flying everywhere and dripping down his shirt when you blurt out, “You’re handsome.”

In a fashion you’d consider comedic, he stops dead in his tracks to gape at you with flushed cheeks. “What?”

“Your face is pretty.” He blinks. A crease appears on his forehead in apparent disapproval, though you’re not sure what he’s mad about (it’s a compliment!), especially when he’s still blushing. You make a vague hand gesture near your head to clarify your next point, “Try untangling it with your fingers.”

It takes Kaiser a good few seconds to get with the program before he twitches to attempt and follow your advice, but you both freeze when you detect the unmistakable sound of a door closing and locking downstairs. You push him back into the bathroom and close it behind yourself as gently as possible. Then you drag him back to the tub and gesticulate incomprehensibly some more to signal you should both get in and hide before sliding in behind the curtain and reclining on your side. Kaiser follows after you, but you think you might be doomed. It’s still wet, too, which is unpleasant, but not a priority considering the upcoming disaster.

Kaiser opens his mouth to speak, so you clamp it shut with your palm before putting your index finger over your lips. He embraces you, and he’s trembling, and then he hides in your neck as if you’re going to save him from whatever is about to come.

Like you’d assumed, the house owner enters almost immediately. You’re nauseous, stomach clenching. Kaiser is making a stunning impression of a corpse the way he’s not even breathing anymore in his attempt at being quiet. Your muscles are so tense on alert that it hurts and each passing second puts you more on edge.

Thankfully the flush comes and then the running water and then the person leaves with a click. Their footsteps get fainter and fainter until another door opens and closes. You stand and step out, trying not to make a noise still. Before going out into the hallway you throw a glance over your shoulder just to make sure Kaiser is still walking behind you, which he is.

Your movements are slow and light. The escape, especially while making your way down the stairs, is drawn out and excruciating. You hop out through the window you came in from. There you are outside, somehow without incident.

You turn to look at Kaiser again once you hear the rustle of the grass accompanying his jump. With the adrenaline still kicking, you break out into a sprint, eager to get far away. Kaiser catches up to you and you burst out laughing but you’re not even sure why, since you don’t find any of what transpired particularly amusing. A slight smile appears on his face when he recognizes the sound.

___

The next day you notice Kaiser isn’t at the playground, even though he always gets there before you do. No biggie — you can exert some patience.

After a while you start tapping your foot. It’s not like you have a watch to check what the time is or how long it’s been or a phone to ask him where he’s at. So you settle on putting on a show of irritability.

Nothing. Your legs hurt so you go sit down on the swing. You’re getting pretty old for the playground anyway, you think as you pull out a cigarette and light it, eyes darting around. Parents and their children, but no sign of Micha.

You exceed your usual three and end up burning half the pack in your attempt to occupy yourself during your waiting. It relaxes you usually, smoking, when you have a lot of shit juggling around your brain, but it doesn’t work this time.

Did something happen?

… Did his dad finally kill him?

___

Kaiser doesn’t show up at the playground ever again no matter how many times you go.

___

It’s another day where you need to shield your eyes from the sunlight with your hand. You’ve been seeing more of those since you ran away. Must be allegorical or some shit.

From your peripheral vision, while you walk down the street, you pass by a store that has one of those TVs on display, playing a sports game. You spare a moment to look, intrigued, nostalgic in a way — it reminds you of when you were little, when that kind of thing was more common.

They’re playing football, you realize, and you find that evocative too. Some guy scores a goal and they zoom in on him even though he’s not celebrating, instead choosing to stand there like a statue with his arms crossed. Like he’s too cool to get excited, which strikes you as obnoxious.

Then they show his face in full, up front.

You know that face. You’d recognize that face anywhere.

The back of his jersey reads ‘Kaiser’ and yet you never knew him as anything besides his first name.

At first you’re relieved considering you were under the impression catastrophe must’ve befallen him, but the solace doesn’t last long. When the realization hits, your eyes widen and your lips fall into a thin line. It's similar to a punch in the gut how all the air seems to vacate your chest. All this wind around you and you can’t get any.

The only person you ever loved left you behind without a second glance in your direction.

___

II.

Michael Kaiser is mildly inconvenienced. Billions injured on the scene and millions more will die.

So maybe he’s been ranting at someone who he didn’t even glance at, eyes closed, mind way too lost in his reverie. A part of his brain doesn’t even comprehend he’s in fact speaking to a person instead of a cardboard cutout. It’s to his complete shock and bafflement when after so much babbling he receives a reply. “Hey, Mr. Kaiser was it? Shut the fuck up.”

He flutters his eyes open to give the ingrate a glare and speak his mind some more, but he freezes on the spot at the sight in front of him. His blood runs cold, heart stuttering in his chest.

He’d know that face anywhere, even if right now it’s more unamused and neutral — nothing like the expressions in his memories. He’s not sure why his body is reacting like this either, tensing up with a nervous jitter in his system.

Wasn’t he supposed to have left all that stuff in the past? Yet a single look at you is enough to cause this response: this uncertainty, like he’s still a little boy who veers towards hopeless and incompetent, and fuck, why are you giving him such a dead stare?

Do you not recognize him?

Do you not love him anymore?

It’s a rash thing to focus on as his immediate concern especially when he hasn’t been killing himself with worry over you or anything during your years apart, but right now when you’re in front of him it’s all he wants to know. Which is cruel and selfish in a way, in his specific Kaiser-ish way, how he’s first preoccupied with himself before he wonders about your state of mind or living situation. A need to bait for a sign you still care about him torments him even if it might be drastic right off the bat.

When no ingenious idea for such a thing comes to mind and Kaiser realizes he’s been staring at you like a moron, he says, “Don’t call me Mr. Kaiser. It makes me sound old and decrepit.” And that isn’t what you of all people should be referring to him as.

You continue assessing him in a manner which can be described as judgmental at best. “Isn’t that what you said your name is during your little monologue?”

“You already know what my name is.” The awkward silence which follows is almost unbearable. Kaiser scratches himself on the neck even though he’s not itchy just to pass the time. Finally he snaps, “Aren’t you happy to see me?”

“Sorry to break it to you, sir, but most employees anywhere aren’t happy to listen to ten minute long demented tirades about non-problems.”

“Well maybe I overreacted a little,” concedes Kaiser and gives you what he thinks is a suave smile in an attempt at downplaying how uneasy he is. He thinks you can feel it. He thinks you’re doing it on purpose, hurting him with intention. “Are you seriously going to act like you don’t know me?”

Your pitiless gaze sticks to him like glue even when you take out the ice cubes and throw a generous amount into his drink before sticking a paper parasol in it with lots of spite, which is what the big stink he threw a tantrum over was all about. Kaiser wants to tell you that you’re very hot when you’re no longer a starving punching bag, but thinks better of it. Doesn’t seem charming even coming from him. 

“There.” You slide the cup across the counter towards him. “I fixed your shitty smoothie.”

“It’s not a smoothie!”

“A mocktail is basically juice.”

Wrapping his fingers around it, Kaiser doesn’t leave. Instead he chooses to stay and observe you in silence, jaw clenching.

“You can go.”

“I’m not going until you admit you know who I am.”

“What, are you famous or something?” you ask, bemused.

Kaiser is on the cusp of hypertension because you’re doing it on purpose and you’re not even doing it well because you want him perfectly aware of what you’re up to. You’ve never done this — hurt him before, let alone by design — so Kaiser almost assumed you were incapable of it. Though it makes sense that you are. After all, you’re the same type of inhuman he is, and he’s done this if not worse hundreds of times, and even reveled in it. Yet the realization you’re not what he remembers of you stirs disillusionment within him. The nature of it, he doesn’t quite grasp.

Kaiser contemplates causing a scene more than he already has, but he’s not sure how to do so while still getting what he wants. Trying to joke even though above all he wants to throw a tantrum, he whines, “You’re so immature.”

“I’m sorry that my reaction to getting threatened with a lawsuit over ice cubes was immature, Mr. Kaiser.”

“That’s not what I’m talking about!”

Your exterior remains listless and vacant, and Kaiser wants to scream the longer you scrutinize him in this manner. Eventually you spin your finger near your temple as if to call him delusional, then move onto taking the order of someone else.

His eyes narrow until you’re so blurry he can barely see you, perhaps either to censor you from his sight or because a milder expression wouldn’t suffice in communicating his disdain. With a final grit of his teeth and maybe a visible vein on his forehead, Kaiser stands up to leave. Fine. You win this one, but it’s war now.

The scorch of the sand under his feet startles him. He kind of forgot how hot it was, what with getting so distracted. Another comeuppance on a list of many. Today is punishment.

Dramatic inner soliloquy aside, Kaiser makes it back to the beach bed quickly, still reeling over that interaction. You’re here? You’re here, in front of him again, and apparently you’re not too happy to see him.

In the most disinterested tone he can muster, Sae asks, “Did they fix your smoothie?”

“It’s not a fucking smoothie!” With the grace of a lobotomized koala, Kaiser drops it over the small table separating them and barely resists the urge to hurl it at Sae. This would do wonders for his mental health short term, but again he’s trying to feign decorum.

With his trademark deadpan, Sae pretends none of that just happened. Kaiser turns around to look back at the hotel bar where you’re gesticulating at your coworker. Both of you seem immensely annoyed, wild and animated while you converse.

“Fuck, they’re totally complaining about me.”

Sae follows the line of direction through which Kaiser is stalking you. After a few seconds of analysis, he says, “Those are definitely the ‘this shit stain just threatened to sue me,’ ‘wow, really, what the hell’ faces.”

Kaiser snaps his head to look at him with genuine surprise. “What- How’d you know?”

“... You’re so embarrassing, it’s predictable.”

“And you’re annoying,” he says. “I’ll tell Coach to get rid of you and airdrop me Ness.”

“It’s cute that you think the coach cares about your opinion on me enough to replace me. The same as thinking the strippers at the club like you, in a way.”

There is a while of silence where Kaiser’s just snarling while Sae seems like he couldn’t give less of a shit. Then he adds his finisher,

“Or I guess in your case it’s like thinking the bartender actually cares about your order.”

Oh, fuck this vacation.

___

The heat is unbearable.

You step out into the sun and saunter up the wooden path to take your break away from the beach. Sweat has been exuding from your skin for the last few hours. Even so when you make it to the sidewalk, you keep your eyes trained on the scenery as you trudge on to your destination. The sand, the sea, the plants — some natural and some artificial.

Before long your legs take you to your usual street vendor, where you’ll order a shitty pancake that won’t do much to nourish you, but it’ll be so sweet that you’ll be too nauseous to get hungry for a while. The queue isn’t unbearable.

Not until you sense someone hovering behind you, followed up by a hand settling on your shoulder. You turn around to grace the offender with a disgusted side glance, but you’re so baffled to see Kaiser there, you just… freeze.

He’s sneering at you. In fact he looks so happy with himself, you want to vomit. Preferably on him.

“What a coincidence,” he says without even a sliver of shame.

You roll your eyes and face front again, deciding it’s in your best interest to feign ignorance to his existence. Taking this as a sign to elevate the antics to a more obnoxious level, Kaiser resigns himself to the role of one of those domesticated leeches, hanging off you now, fully wrapping his arm around your shoulders. His gaze is burning into your side profile to the point it’s unnerving and you can feel the artificial smugness emanating from his form.

“I thought we were done talking yesterday.”

“Really? You did? How naive,” he coos at you mockingly.

It is convenient that during this time of need — when you’re lacking a good comeback — your time to order comes up. You talk to the guy working about your aforementioned shitty pancake. The moment you shut your mouth, however, Kaiser starts listing off things you’re not even keeping track of like you’re hanging out together or something.

With a mild dispute over whether it’s ‘backwards’ that they do not accept payment through a card, which makes you want to die because you’re a regular here and now the employee who knows you by face will associate you with this pest, Kaiser pays for your thing, too. On the one hand you’re prideful, but on the other you’ve lived the life of a bottomfeeder who takes every scrap they’re given without question, and it’s the kind of conditioning you can’t let go of. So you allow it.

He ends up with an inordinate amount of food in his hands, too much for one person to eat. You’re still doing your ignoring shtick even when Kaiser pulls you down to sit next to him on the table. Content with pretending he doesn’t exist as he is dead to you, you bite onto your food in relative peace, mind drifting somewhere else. Until he speaks that is. “This must be our fateful meeting.”

“I don’t see what’s so fateful about it if you followed me?”

Unbeknownst to you, Kaiser too is adept at the ‘hearing only what he wants to hear’ game. So he moves on with the conversation without any indicator of comprehending what you just said. “I think it’s quite ironic, actually.”

“What are you on about now?”

“You told me you want to go to the beach once. And where do I find you? On the beach. It's an astral influence, I’m sure.”

“Ah? I don’t remember telling you that.”

You’re blinking at him in mild confusion. This hurts Kaiser a hundred times more than when you were deliberately going out of your way to act dismissive of him because he can tell you mean it. To think one of the moments he clung onto the most had slipped your mind.

His eyes are wide and his lips stand still in a thin line, so he forces himself to smirk again and glosses over the information which just shattered him. “So you admit you know me then?”

“No, Mr. Kaiser, I have no idea who you are. I’m thinking you should admit yourself to a hospital. They say false memories are an important symptom in psychopathology.”

“Very funny. I prefer Micha or at least Michael, though.”

“Do I give a fuck?”

He scowls at you. “Yes.”

You finish off your pancake and wipe your hands with the napkin in mild disgust. Kaiser laughs at the wrinkle of your face while you do so, and then he scoots an inch closer.

“Help me finish it all off.” He gestures at all the paper plates.

Pinching between your fingers, you tug the first thing that seems appetizing closer to your side of the table. Kaiser scoops up some of the portion for himself and dumps it in another meal. You ask, “Why are you trying to suck up to me?”

“Aw, is it so wrong to want to treat my closest friend?”

You scoff. The movement of your eyelids fascinates Kaiser — you never really showed any annoyance towards him before, so he finds these expressions of distaste fascinating even if they make him sick. “We haven’t seen each other in four years, so if I’m still your closest friend somehow, that’s just sad. Be for real if you’re gonna be anything.”

“You’re being so difficult! What did I even do?!” To be honest, he’s lying and his gaze isn’t even shying away from you while he’s lying, not even a twitch. He knows you, so he knows that you’re mad he couldn’t be assed to tell you where he went even though he obviously could. He thinks playing dumb might be more in his favor here, though, so he’ll do that. “I don’t even like going to the fucking beach. I’ve been going every year to different places searching for you.”

The unbridled perturbation on your face upon hearing this is quite amusing. Priceless even. You were calling him crazy merely for the sake of fucking with him, and perhaps it was your earnest attempt at gaslighting him but you’re not about to admit it. Right now, though, you think he is genuinely insane.

“You’re saying that to appease me,” you accuse, hoping you’re correct, but also not. The idea he might’ve thought about you like you did about him while you were separated enthralls you, though you can’t let him win you over his bullshit.

“Maybe,” says Kaiser, trying to be mysterious.

Since he obviously wants you to ask him for an elaboration, you deny him the satisfaction.

“How much do you make working at that shitty bar?”

“Enough.”

“I should take you back to Spain with me,” Kaiser decides. With too much confidence at that. “You’d have anything you could ever want.”

It is not like it was before. He’s not acting the way he used to. You suppose you aren’t either. But anyway, you thought it inconceivable that he would ever joke — is he joking? — or make the absurd statements he’s been making. It’s natural, in a way, since you’re also not of the same temperament as before.

With a huff, you say, “You’ll never be my sugar daddy, Kaiser.”

“You’re no fun nowadays.” There’s an amused lilt in his tone while he sneers — you think the way he smiles is fake. You recall he was kind of quiet and awkward and stilted, unnatural at first maybe because he was out of practice in communicating with others, but now he speaks with insincere charisma, like a showman. Yet still the things he says so casually are off-kilter, ruining whatever illusion he’s attempting to sell. “And I said to call me Micha.”

“I don’t need to call you anything.”

It’s all about the metamorphosis. It’s about becoming each other so you’re never truly apart.

___

You’re crouching under one of the tropical trees overlooking the road by the wooden path leading down the beach. The shade is insufficient and the heels of your feet are digging into your ass to the point it hurts. Before your break, the thought of smoking a cigarette had entered your brain so you obeyed it as it was too pervasive even though you don’t enjoy lighting up anything during such weather, believe it or not.

Your eyes are glossy since you’re spacing out, taking puffs. When two silhouettes come to a halt right in front you, only then does the absentminded trance end.

Kaiser waves at you with unnecessary enthusiasm which is just for show. They’re late, arriving way past their usual time. Earlier when he and his companion didn’t show when you expected them to, you assumed maybe their vacation ended and they’d headed home.

The other guy is sullen, but at least his eye lashes are long, which must count for something. After sparing you a glance, he turns towards Kaiser and says judgmentally, “You’re still harassing staff.”

“I’m not har-”

Not giving a shit, the other guy straight up leaves, not bothering to participate in the discussion on a topic he brought up. You watch in mild bafflement as he walks off without a care.

“Ignore him,” Kaiser says. A plastic smile overtakes his face before he squats down next to you, butting into your body with his and almost toppling you over. This is probably bad for his knees, and you’re half exposed to the sun now. Somehow he has created several problems where there were none. “You still smoke.”

You don’t reply, but maintain the common decency not to blow any in his face. He should stay away from you. Isn’t he an athlete? Shouldn’t he be cautious about secondhand smoke? You consider putting it out altogether, then, so you stub it in the almost empty can of the fizzy drink you’d been drinking earlier.

“What kind of lighter do you have now? Has your taste gotten any better?”

No response again. He places an arm around your waist. Through touching you so often it’s like he’s trying to hammer it into your head that you were close, and yet intangible things seem to evade Kaiser, so maybe he’s struggling to conceive of any other way to reestablish your connection.

“You still smell the same. Like nicotine.”

“Well, you smell the way you used to, too.”

The space between his brows wrinkles and his nose twitches in irritation at your words. “The fuck do you mean? No, I don’t.”

“Let me spell it out for you in a way we both understand.” For the first time since your strange reunion, you reciprocate the physicality and pull him in by the shoulder till you’re forehead to forehead so you can look him in the eyes while explaining. “When I saw you a few days ago for the first time in so long, it was like you basically still had a sign that says ‘broke ass bum.’”

He gapes at you with incredulity, this offended expression on his face.

“I mean,” you say, snickering in bewilderment at the absurdity of his previous actions, “you were gonna sue me over some ice cubes, really? Acting like a spoiled little prince to disguise where you crawled out from? I think you and I have got the kinda stench not even all the Dior in Avenue Montaigne can wipe off.”

His fingers would’ve dug hard into your flesh if your shirt wasn’t in the way with how his grip tightens in response. The grit of his teeth exposes more of them. Strangely, you think he has nice gums. “Why the fuck are you being like this?”

“‘Cause you were content to forget all about me, but you don’t want me to be angry at you either. You should’ve just been polite and pretended you didn’t recognize me. But no, you want it all. I hate people like you who make no sense.”

“You’re just jealous,” Kaiser accuses, trying the snobby angle. If he’s pretentious then he’s not hurt by you claiming you despise him. At least that’s what he settles on.

“Sure. That could be true as well.” You stand up and take the can with you to throw away.

Kaiser plops down on the sand, tired of squatting, and doesn’t bother watching you plod back to the bar but the sound of your footsteps rings heavy in his ears until it dissipates. He hugs his knees like the wet wipe he is at heart.

The kindest person he’d known was a scammer and a liar and a thief and who knows what else. It hurts like nothing else to bear the weight of your desertion.

This must be cellular rejection. You should’ve been ecstatic to see him on account of your shared inhumanity. Does it not matter to you anymore, the fact that you and Kaiser are the same?

… Right; you’re not the ball. When he hits you, you can hit him back.

___

The beach is desolate and eerie at night. Kaiser came out to brood, which was fine because Sae didn’t care to ask him where he was going when he left the room. Unlike during the day, the sand is cool under his feet now — what an obtuse observation to make, all things considered. He’s annoyed and frustrated at himself as usual when things don’t go his way.

There’s a light illuminating someone’s face where they recline on one of the lounge chairs. It’s blue, meaning the source is a phone. Kaiser startles because he assumed he was alone.

And you startle when you see him staring at you in the dark, but instead of screaming all you do is let out an unconvincing gasp and turn on the backlight to reveal him. Kaiser covers his eyes with his forearms and turns away, letting out some vampiric kind of noise.

Then you frown and go back to tapping away on your shitty mobile game. “You’re such a creep honestly,” you say in distaste.

Once he gets over the assault you just committed on his admittedly sensitive eyes, Kaiser sits down next to you uninvited.

“It’s a coincidence,” he snaps. “I don’t want to be around you either. You’re so fucking exhausting. Can’t talk to you like a normal person at all because of your stupid grudge.”

“Then why are you still trying?”

Of course, there are many answers to that question. Some including but not limited to I think I can still love you like before and I miss you and I regret not sending you that postcard and I hate how you’re mad at me, but I can’t seem to get it right. Though such pathetic things aren’t in Kaiser’s nature to spew, so they never make it past his throat. The words constrict around his neck like a noose.

Instead of answering, he says, “You’ve got a phone now. You should give me your number.”

“No.”

“You’re just trying to make my life difficult for no reason!”

You give him another one of your blank stares. In the dullness of the night, obviously the gesture stays meaningless, though Kaiser can sense the bemusement in your silence at least.

Seeing that ignoring the problem at large isn’t turning out to be the winning move, Kaiser sighs and tries to think of what to say. There’s probably some kind of trick to this, some way he could fool you into overlooking his transgressions. Though when you were friends, he never did that to you, and you never left him then. Maybe it’s not necessary. In this situation, it’s proving to even be detrimental.

Kaiser picks at the skin on his neck. It’s to his benefit you can’t see each other well — he’s not sure he’d be able to spit it out without the detachment of the environment. “Listen, I’m not good at this shit, but… If I have to be honest, I was really paranoid. I didn’t want to think about the past and I didn’t want to get dragged back into it, so I was too scared to even write you a letter to tell you I’m fine. But stumbling on you again, it’s probably fucking stupid but I don’t want to lose track of you anymore. It’s lonely.”

“I wasted a year of my life thinking you were dead,” you say.

“I’m sorry.”

“Tomorrow’s my free day.”

There’s an uncertain excitement in Kaiser now, as if you might be yanking his chain and he doesn’t want to commit to the feeling right away. “Sure, I’m leaving after tomorrow, so that works. Meet me here and we can catch up.”

“I see this shitty beach enough as it is,” you say.

“Yeah, but not the way you’re supposed to.”

You shrug.

Without prompting or any indication that you care, Kaiser says, “I have a horrible sunburn.” He will always find something to bitch about. It’s like he’s never satisfied.

After a few swipes, you unlock your phone and pass it to him so he can add his contact information. “Then use aloe vera or something. What are you, stupid?”

“I don’t have any,” justifies Kaiser, inputting the digits. His tone is defensive because this is the first he’s heard of it, but it’s not like he’ll admit that.

Your forgiveness is fake, in a way. It’d been a grudge you held for a while and a betrayal you wouldn’t tolerate from anyone else. Maybe you’ll hold it over his head if he displeases you. So it’s not real forgiveness, is it, more so a lenience, a testament to your past, that your love for him somehow prevails over your need to enact the lex talionis.

___

The sand sinks under your weight with each step you take, waves lapping over the shoreline, seagulls and children squealing in the background. Sunset makes everything easier on the eyes and the heat is finally settling down since it’s getting late into the afternoon.

You had a nice time catching up with Kaiser in another part of the city, although he displayed a susceptibility to tourist traps. He gloated a lot, and you pretended you didn’t know about half of it from reading his Wikipedia page that one time when you were fostering your hate boner for him. You told him about how you ran away and ended up in another country and about how you’re still on the missing persons site.

Now you’re going back by the seaside instead of through the streets. You walk side by side, your ankles touching the water. Kaiser’s grin is wide, which makes him seem smug, but this time it doesn’t strike you as forced so maybe he is simply carefree. It’s an unusual sight for you — Kaiser, genuinely smiling.

“I think I’ll come see you again when it’s off season. Or maybe we can arrange for you to come visit me instead. I’ve got all sorts of things I want to show you,” he says. He never really had anything to give you before, and now he takes pride in having the means to do so, regardless of whether you’re interested or impressed.

“Whatever, Micha. You’re so full of it. I bet it’ll be lame or you’ll forget you promised.”

He remains pleased despite the teasing, even happier if possible. “It’s fine if you say pointless shit like that, I don’t mind a challenge. All I have to do is prove you wrong.”

___

Lol at the end of finishing this I teared up in Frustration because I couldn't write this the way I envisioned it and then I couldn't save it through editing either (<- guy who's defiinitely normal and casual ) and I kinda just wanted to be done with it so I'm not gonna hold it hostage any longer either. Idk I'm just mad and depressed about it rn i guess. Thank U all for tapping in

[cstads-blog]

10 ᴛʜɪɴɢꜱ ɪ ʜᴀᴛᴇ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ | ʟᴇᴡɪꜱ ʜᴀᴍɪʟᴛᴏɴ 44

masterlist

summary: in which you and lewis broke up, and things that you once loved are now things you hate

a/n: this is my first fic so be nice plz, but leave some thoughts. ummm and i also have rewatched 10 things i hate about you like 285903925 this week so thats where i got this idea from the poem. and i love lewis, but i lowkey felt he was perfect for this sort of thing

————————————

i hate the way you talk to me, and the way you cut your hair

lewis always had a soft voice. he never once yelled at you, always calm and cordial. even when you would fight, he would never raise his voice. it angered you. it was strange. you wanted him to yell at you. just to experience it. no one ever wanted their partner to yell at them, and they were jealous of you and lewis in this aspect of your relationship.

when you asked lewis why he never yelled at you, his answer was simple. he loved you. you don’t yell at people you love he would say. and then he would kiss you. the soft kiss he always placed on your lips when it was just the two of you. it was calming, comforting and it made you forget the battle you were having inside of yourself.

-

lewis had had his fair share of different hairstyles over the time you had known him and been together. some you favored more then others. he’d had a buzz, natural, braids. you loved when he left it natural, playing with the curls in between your fingers. which is why when he came home one day with braids you were a bit upset. its not that you didn’t like the braids, he looked amazing as usual, but you much preferred his natural curls.

as you laid in your bed beside him you started rubbing your hand up and down his neck, feeling the braids hit your hand whenever you moved up his neck. they were soft. you played with the ends of them, twirling them around your finger. lewis loved it. he loved when you touched his hair, it comforted him. he never wanted to lose moments like these.

i hate the way you drive my car, i hate it when you stare

lewis’s job was to drive cars, and to drive them fast. he’d been doing it practically his whole life. so naturally he was a bit reckless driving a normal car, on a normal road, surrounded by normal people. one night when you took your car out to dinner he was pushing the limits. trying to see how far he could go without breaking the law. it scared you. not for your safety or his, but for your car. your car was the first purchase you made of your own, with your own money. it was yours, you rarely let others drive it, but lewis was an exception.

“lewis you’re going to hurt the car” he would often hear you say when he was driving.

“don’t worry darling, its going to be fine. trust me” and you trusted him. you did. you knew he would never hurt your car. or you.

-

lewis had a habit of watching your every move. it wasn’t strange or weird to you, you loved it. lewis had that affect on you. every small action was one that you loved. everyone around always saw it too. when you would come to races and were in the garage talking to friends and family, he would watch you. how you interacted with people you were close with and even those you weren’t. that was another thing he loved about you. how you could get on with anyone. it didn’t matter if you knew them for fifteen years or fifteen minutes.

as he watched you, the smile on his face grew, only snapping out of his daze when someone came up behind him, touching his shoulder and pulling him away for a meeting.

i hate your big dumb combat boots, and the way you read my mind

lewis had impeccable fashion taste. his outfits never failed to impress you and everyone else. except once, when he came out of the closet with a pair of of combat boots. you couldn’t help but laugh at his choice of footwear, expecting him to chose something more expensive and high end. but no, lewis was wearing combat boots.

seeing your reaction to his shoes made him smile as well and even though he was feeling content with his outfit, he went and changed into something different. he never got rid of the combat boots though. they sat in his closet and you never let him forget about it.

-

lewis had an incredible talent of reading your mind. he always knew what you wanted or needed without even having to say it. you often wondered how he did it. it took you at least five tries to even remember what his order was at the restaurant but he knew what you wanted before you did. part of you was angry with his little trick, but the other part loved that he knew so much about you and he could remember even the little things.

i hate you so much it makes me sick, it even makes me rhyme

you didn’t deal with anger or stress well. you often got sick when you were feeling either emotion. while lewis was practically the definition of a perfect boyfriend, he could still bring these two emotions out of you. when you would feel stressed with lewis’ actions he would often forget the petty argument or trivial thing he did and run immediately to you, to help you, to calm you down. it showed you just how willing he was to help you when you needed him the most.

i hate the way you’re always right, i hate it when you lie

lewis was never wrong. ever. no matter how many times you tried to prove him wrong, you couldn’t. he knew so many things about so many people and places, it was often hard to find a topic he wasn’t fluent in. when you would play trivia games out of boredom in your living room he would always get every question right, while you struggled to even come up with an answer.

-

lewis rarely ever lied to you, but when he did you couldn’t stand it. you’d been in unfaithful relationships in the past. lewis knew this, which was why he rarely lied. his only lies ever came after drunken nights out with his friends and he’d forgotten certain details, but small things like that made you nervous, not wanting to escalate to anything else.

i hate it when you make me laugh, even more when you make me cry

lewis was a very funny person. he made you laugh even without trying. that was what initially attracted you to him. he could make you laugh when you were happy, upset, scared, angry. he made you laugh about simple things he did. he often wasn’t trying to make you laugh, but seeing the smile grow on your face was enough to make him keep trying.

all he wanted was time see you smile, to see you happy.

-

you never cried tears of sadness around lewis, only happiness. they usually came when he did something great in racing or when you graduated university. you often cried when you saw lewis up on the podium, seeing the smile on his face, making you think about all of the hard work he had put into getting there. you would always admire him for that. his hard work, his dedication.

i hate it when you’re not around, and the fact you didn’t call

lewis was often away for work so you spent quite a bit of time alone. yes, you had his dog roscoe to keep you company but it wasn’t quite the same. the house was loud with silence, every small action making a seemingly larger noise then usual. it annoyed you. you missed lewis and you just wanted to be in his arms, with him, in whatever country he was in this weekend. but it wasn’t that easy. you had to work as well, you couldn’t just drop everything to go travel the world with him, even if you would like to.

-

lewis couldn’t always call you when he was away. with his busy schedule and a time difference, usually a quick text every few hours would have to suffice. you hated not hearing his voice for days. you just wanted to hear his soft voice, like a melody in your ears. he left you voice mails when he did call, but you couldn’t answer. you listened to them on repeat, trying to soak up his voice, capture it in your head until you could see him again. it would be sweeter to hear in person then over the phone so you had to wait.

and that’s what you kept telling yourself. it would be sweeter in person. thats how you dealt with the distance. you just waited for the time he was back in your arms.

but mostly i hate the way i don’t hate you, not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all

and that is how you end up here. standing in the corner of the crowded party you had gotten invited to by one of the other drivers you still kept in contact with after the split from lewis. you weren’t trying to be a downer, but seeing lewis again after so long had all of the memories flooding back, all of the thoughts and hopes and dreams you had together. he looked so happy. having fun and drinking with his friends. you remembered the times when you were right next to him at an event just like this. wrapped in his arms, the comfort they brought you. but then the bad came back, the end. you hated lewis, at least that’s what you told people. but you knew it wasn’t true. you had known it all along, just in denial you never admitted that fact.

but here, standing in the corner of this crowded room, is when you could finally admit it. you didn’t hate lewis hamilton, not even close. not even a little bit, not even at all.

[thesims4blogger]

The Sims 4: New Game Patch (July 23rd, 2024)

EA has just released a new patch for The Sims 4, updating the game for the upcoming Lovestruck Expansion Pack, as well as bringing new additions and bug fixes for existing problems.

If you have auto updates enabled in Origin’s “Application Settings”, the game will auto-update once you open Origin. If you have auto-updates disabled, you will need to manually update by clicking the game in your library. Advertisement

To ensure your game is up to date, check the game version found in Documents > EA > The Sims 4 > GameVersion.txt. Your game should now read: PC: 1.108.289.1030 / Mac: 1.108.289.1230 / Console: 1.94

Sul Sul, Simmers!  We’re lovestruck to share this abundance of new Base Game features and pack fixes!

What’s New in The Sims 4 ?

All for Love

Romantic Boundaries

Real life relationships are nuanced and complex!  Romantic Boundaries bring some of that into The Sims 4 by enabling you to define the conditions under which your Sims become jealous. These live in Create a Sim alongside the “Gender” and “Sexual Orientation” options in the Identity Panel and you can change them at any point in time.

Does your Sim become Jealous from Non-Physical Romance? Non-Physical Romance consists of social interactions that do not involve physical touch. Examples: flirting and complimenting appearance

Does your Sim become Jealous from Physical Romance? Physical Romance consists of socials that do involve physical touch. Examples: Kissing and holding hands

Does your Sim become Jealous from WooHoo? This applies to WooHoo for Young Adults and older and Mess Around for Teens.

Is your Sim open to changing the factors that cause them to become Jealous? “Yes” means the Sim can be asked in Live Mode to reconsider their feelings surrounding Jealousy for the settings above.

The defaults for all of these will be “Yes” for Sims in your existing games so that you can be the one to decide if you want different behavior.  New Sims that the game makes can run the spectrum!

Hiding Relationships

As your Sims are dating or simply going about their daily lives, their Relationship Panel will accumulate more and more Sims. Tired of it being cluttered with random Sims that you met once and have no desire to meet again?  Or have an ex that you want to scrub from your contacts?  Well, good news! Now you can remove those Sims (who are not members of your household) by selecting them in the Relationship Panel and selecting “Hide Relationship”. Make room for the Sims who really matter!

Neutral Relationship Names

The language for Sims’ relationships now is more neutral to be more inclusive.

“Husband / Wife” → “Spouse”

“Fiancé / Fiancée” → “Engaged”

“Boyfriend/Girlfriend” → “Partner”

One place where you can see this is in Create a Sim.  Select the “Identity” button (it looks like three dots) and go to the Household Relationships Panel.

Partner Status

Previously, the Partners relationship could only be established through gameplay. Now you can set it within Create a Sim between two Sims in your household!

Create a Sim

Eyelashes

Eyelashes now have their own category! As you all know, some eye shapes have eyelashes as part of them. Now, Sims can have separate eyelashes applied independently from the shape of the eye! And since they are in their own category, they also are compatible with other accessories such as glasses and piercings. The base game includes two styles of lashes for a more dramatic look for your Sims! Seriously! It’s for everyone. For free. Today. Right now!

“Apply to All Outfits” Button

The days of manually finding and selecting the same accessory, makeup, hat, hair, top, bottom, full-body outfit, or footwear for each outfit are gone!  Now you can hit this single button to apply the item to every outfit at once! Love that makeup look you just perfected in your Sim’s Everyday style? Now you can apply it to multiple categories! Found the perfect pair of pants for your party outfit, but applied it to Everyday by accident? You can also select specific categories to copy to, as well! This works on all ages and with all types of Occult Sims. We can’t believe it either. Is today the best day ever?!

Note: Currently, the Apply All Button adds the selected item to your Sim’s outfits. It does not remove outfit pieces - only adds or replaces.

We look forward to any feedback you might have on this new feature, so we can continue to improve it to meet your CAS needs in future releases!

Updated Hairstyles

Is that a new hairstyle or are you just happy to see me? Yes, we are happy to see you and, yes, it is new hair!

Dark and Lovely Hairstyle Partnership

And there’s even more hair! Part two of The Sims 4 collaboration with Dark and Lovely arrives in this update with two color variants of the new loc braids. Check out Dark & Lovely’s - Play In Color, a campaign that champions diversity and inclusion and spotlights the game changers who are redefining the rules in the games industry.

French Tips, Coffin Nails, and Neutral Palettes

We’re excited to bring more nail styles and color palettes! There are new designs for French Tips and Coffin Nails to add flair to your fingertips. We’ve also added more color palettes for everyone to express themselves more freely! A whole new series of nude nails is also available to provide an extensive selection to match natural nail beds.

Build Mode: Curved Pools

Now your pools can have rounded corners! Curved Pools work like Curved Walls—place a corner piece and adjust the sides. Mix and match with regular corners—let your imagination run wild! There also is a new pool light, Oblong Wall Light, that works perfectly on curved pool walls!

Live Mode

Relationship Interactions

A new “Relationship…” category in the Interaction menu now contains actions across the Base Game and a number of packs that directly relate to relationship status such as “Ask to Join Household” or “Become Best Friends”.

Safe Music Streaming

The Music section of Game Options now has a “Safe for Steaming” toggle to play only the music that is safe for streaming The Sims 4! When this is checked, you don’t have to worry about your stream or video running into music copyright issues. We’ll be adding more music with streaming-friendly licensing as time goes on.

Neighborhood Stories

Neighborhood Stories now has two new options within Manage Households: Friendship Changes and Romance Changes. This enables Sims in other households to start and end those types of relationships on their own. You can use the mailbox each day to “Check Recent Neighborhood Stories” for news such as Sims your household knows becoming best friends, breaking up, or getting back together.

Conversation Panel

We gave a new coat of paint to improve the usability of that panel that appears at the top of the screen when your active Sim is in a conversation! Did you know you can do all these things with it?

Select the Sims’ portraits to see…

their mood

their relationship levels (regular and romantic) with your Sim

Select the book icon to see that Sim’s Sentiment with your Sim

Bug Fixes

Base Game / Multipack

Top Fixes

Toddlers now receive Top Notch and Happy Reward Traits after reaching the required Skill levels. Leave no Toddler behind!

Stair Railings no longer disappear when one tile is placed next to a one tile room.

When Sims change their mind about how they are walking to somewhere, they no longer teleport to their final destination.

Sims who are not part of the Date interrupt conversations less often. Buzz off, bub!

Sims no longer receive a “Break-Up“ Want when they have a High Romantic Relationship with that Sim.

When leaving Create a Sim, the makeup sliders now maintain their settings.

Fingernails no longer are warped for male Sims with a female frame and vice versa. The same goes for nails with various outfits.

Several nose rings now fit properly (yfAfrican09_Nose, yuAcc_NoseLeftGP12RingDouble_Black, yuAcc_NoseLeftEP09Ring_Silver, yuAcc_NoseRightGP12RingDouble_Black, andyuAcc_NoseRightEP09Ring_Silver). Pierce to your heart's content.

We smoothed out the frame rate stuttering that sometimes occurred  a few minutes after launching the game.

Live Mode

Sims in a relationship will no longer receive unsolicited autonomous flirtations from other Sims, unless they have the Noncommittal Trait, of course.

Sims will Dance if the radio is turned on and playing music, but they'll save their dance moves if the radio is turned off.

Enchanting and Flirty interactions are now only available for Sims who are compatible with the active Sim's orientation.

Married Sims no longer receive a Want to flirt with Sims who are not their spouse.

Teen Sims will no longer feel jealous around a previous Teen romantic partner who has become a Young Adult.

Jealousy was getting ahead of itself! Those jealousy buffs were wrongly calling an engaged Sim a spouse. We've calmed things down and fixed the mix-up!

Upon learning a Sim's WooHoo interest and opening their Sim Profile, the Sim Profile will no longer say “No One“ even when the sim has a WooHoo interest in Men/Women.

The Knowledge of a Sim's Sexual Orientation and their Sim Profile will now remove outdated information when that Sim changes their Sexual Orientation in Create a Sim.

The need for fun won't stop a Sim from enjoying their meal—they'll finish eating before fulfilling their fun needs.

When multitasking two books being read, the Sim will no longer skip the first book. Now they will read it, put it away, and then go for the second book.

“Make a Move“ now is available between Sims whose marriage was established in Create a Sim.

If a Sim is rejected after asking another Sim on a date, a notification will be given on why they were turned down.

Ghost Sims are now available for “Ask on Date...“ from the Relationship Panel.

Both the Host Sim and the Sim's date can contribute to the main date goal with one another. Before, only the Host Sim could accomplish the goal.

If a Sim heads off to work or school during an Event, the Event will come to an end. Duty calls!

Planning a Stay Over during an Event at the Sim’s home will bring the Event to a successful close. Time to kick back and relax!

If a Discovery Quest appears during an Event, the Event progress bar will not reset if the Discovery Quest is canceled.

If a Discovery Quest appears during an Event that has Goals and Rewards, your Sims now keep their Event titles and the progress remains visible.

Sims will be able to “Ask on Date...“ without the need for Romantic Relationship. That won't stop Sims from rejecting the date proposal if things are off though.

When planning an Event, the Plumbob will appear next to the venue choices when scrolling through the available locations.

When planning an Event, the selected venue will appear at the top of the selection list if you navigate away and then back to the venue selection.

When planning an Event, Sims that are preselected will now count as a single entry rather than not being counted.

When planning an Event on console, the tooltip will now inform that a Sim is being changed from a Guest to a Hired Role. Additionally, a tooltip will appear if the Sim being hired for a Role has work scheduled during the Event.

When planning an Event on console, the location image will not appear in the description section of the planning page. Just the description text will appear.

When setting up an Event, the checkmark for each phase such as “Invite Sims” now is on the right side of the button for easier reading.

A Sim now can learn about another Sim's financial status when they “Get to Know“ that Sim.

Lips are synced so that Sims making out keep their lips on their kissing partner. No more awkwardly talking mid-kiss!

When Sims get steamy in the shower from WooHoo, music now jazzes up the moment.

Sims in more restrictive costumes now kneel instead of sitting cross-legged.

Sims wearing the Hotdog costume will not intersect with their knees while kneeling on the ground.

“Skinny Dip with...“ no longer is available on pools when no other Sims are nearby.

The complete text for a joke falling flat now appears on failed comedy and funny socials, rather than getting cut off in the pop-up.

Mugs and tumblers fit better in Sims' hands now.

Music will continue to play in Live Mode even if “Next Song“ is selected while the game is paused.

The highlight for newly acquired Sentiments that appears around a Sim's portrait in the Relationship Panel is removed once the Sim profile is opened.

Unavailable actions in the Interaction menu are easier to read now.

Icons appearing with the music note have been fixed and are now playing in the right direction.

The text of phone call pop-ups now fills the space better.

Shadows no longer are checkered for some platforms.

Placing a lot from the Gallery no longer changes the color of the world on some platforms while the lot is building.

Pressing Alt + Tab in Fullscreen Mode on Windows now opens the Task Switcher for computers with DirectX 11.

Some interactions related to Sims being affectionate, sleeping in bed, reading books, going to other locations, and asking Sims on dates are more performant.

Answering incoming text messages works with both control method types on console (hovering or snapping the cursor).

The correct venue is highlighted in the venue selection when planning an Event from a Sim's home lot on console.

Build Mode

Cellar stair trim no longer extrudes down to the basement floor when the basement floor is removed.

Walls directly under stairs now properly cut away in ''Walls Cutaway View.' 

All “Mega Double Doors“ swatches now include transparent glass.

Bar Backs are included in the “Bars & Bar Backs“ category. Cheers!

When building Pools, Rotate and Copy no longer increase the cost of the Pool.

Large Curved Walls now can be placed on Large Curved Platforms.

Create a Sim

The ability to customize Toddler Toenails has returned. Look at those cute, colorful toesies!

Fingernails no longer clip through the gloves of full-body outfits.

French tip nails (ymAcc_ManiFrenchTip_Beige) have been manicured to no longer intersect with fingers.

Hair texture no longer changes when the Tank Top (yfTop_SDX021BinderRacerback) is applied to a female Sim.

The Simoleons thrown by Sims with the Materialistic Trait in Create a Sim now catch a little more air. Gotta show off the bucks with a bang.

The contrast and font color have been improved for better readability in the Styled Looks section of Create a Sim.

Gallery Server

Viewing creations from Followers should return results more quickly (internet speeds allowing) so you can get straight into browsing all of their shared creations.

Blocked players no longer show up in the Gallery searches.

Simmers on PlayStation and Xbox can see their Profile Showcase uploads in the Gallery again.

Get to Work

Scheduling Events from the Calendar while in Sixam no longer is available—seems like there's no signal here!

Posing for a picture will look fabulous without creepy zombie teeth cutting into your face.

Get Together

Closets built into walls once again allow your Sims to “WooHoo“ and “Try For Baby.“ Get Together indeed!

Sims will no longer ignore your desire to “Make Out with...“ when using the Get Together closets: Perfect Size Closet, Squaring it Square, and Fashionista’s Closet.

Pronouns on the notification for acquiring the Dance Skill and asking about another Sim are now correct.

City Living

Rounded decks, walls, platforms, pools, and fountains can now be placed in Apartments in San Myshuno.

Cats & Dogs

A Sim without the Cat Lover Trait who is watching the sky from the picnic table with another Sim who has that Trait will not spontaneously stare elsewhere besides their partner and the sky.

A Sim with the Cat Lover Trait will no longer slide in animations when sitting close with another Sim.

Interactions for collecting Cat and Dog hair piles are more performant. Every follicle counts!

Sim clothes will no longer remain on when entering Sim tattoo mode in Create a Sim after using Paint Mode or selecting Coat Colors & Patterns on Pets.

Seasons

Sims now can use indoor Pools even when the weather is freezing.. They can be directed to use outdoor Pools, but won’t do so on their own.

Flower Bunny and Patchy the Scarecrow now are off the market for Dates.

Ain't That A Slate Toilet now has the appropriate two-tone swatch color.

When planning a Holiday, all Traditions will correctly appear as selected when multiple are selected quickly.

Get Famous

The colors of the male full-body Trench Coat (ymBody_EP06CoatLong) no longer automatically change when paired with tall boots.

Discover University

Professors no longer run away when attempting to take them on a date.

Cottage Living

Foxes will no longer appear in Manage Households. Those foxes were sneaking in somewhere they didn't belong.

Finchwick Fair submissions now properly return to Sim's inventory or to their Household Inventory after the Fair is over. Stealing is bad, Finchwick!

High School Years

Teen Sims can now complete their Aspiration goal by using the “Ask about College Parties“ phone interaction with other Teens and then “Sneak Out“ through an openable window.

If acne is disabled in the Game Options, it will not appear on Sims in Live Mode.

The correct icons now appear in the Action Queue for “Admire Courage“, “Moving Too Fast“, and “Talk about Marriage“ rather than just showing the Sims face.

The Social Bunny icon now looks more social instead of romantic.

Once a Teen Sim becomes a Young Adult, the “Ask a Crush Out“ and “Chat with a Crush“ Wants are no longer available.

The light is back in Sims’ eyes with certain hairstyles (yfHair_EP12WavyFadeOmbre, ymHair_EP12WavyFadeOmbre, and ymHair_EP12WavyFade).

“Talk about Marriage“ now appears in the “Small Talk“ section of the Interaction Pie Menu and won't always surface to the main Pie Menu interactions.

Benchmark Seating’s preview image now is pink when viewing the pink swatch. I can't blame it, blue's a great color.

Growing Together

Even if two Sims have amazing compatibility, romantic interactions won't always be successful.

Haughty Herringbone Wall and Floor Tile’s color swatch for the gray version now matches instead of being black. Don't mind it, it was just going through an emo phase…

Teen Sims will only have memories of “First Mess Around“ and will not confuse this with “First Woohoo.“ Teens will have to wait for adulthood for that.

Photobooth pictures will now fit nice and snug inside the Hodgepodge Photo Collage Frames.

The social compatibility icon has been improved in the Relationship Panel to better represent compatibility.

Horse Ranch

If a Sim leaves a conversation while mounted, they no longer blather on indefinitely.

Chestnut Ridge now shows its attractions when considering it for a Vacation. The tourism board wants you to visit for Dreadhorse Caverns, its rare fishing spots, and, of course, the horseback riding!

“Ask about Getting a Horse“ now shows the Friendly interaction icon in the Action Queue rather than showing the Horse Trainer's face.

Up to eight Sims can enter the Equestrian Center instead of just one to spectate competitions—yeehaw!

If the computer is broken, Sims now have to repair it before they can purchase or rescue a Horse with it.

Horses move more smoothly and navigate more directly at Fast Speed and Ultra Speed.

Horses no longer teleport to their destination when trying to walk backwards in Fast Speed or Ultra Speed.

Foals turn around instead of sometimes going backwards to use objects.

Horses have lots of “locomotion” improvements!  They travel more directly to their destination, slow down when going through gates, and stop more smoothly.  They walk in and out of narrow spaces and gates (forwards and backwards!) more deftly.

Moreover, autonomous Horse movement is more performant.

Sims on Horses no longer socialize with Sims through walls.

For Rent

Residential Rentals are now available for Penthouse Lots! We were waiting for Residential Rentals to high-rise to the occasion and now they're ready to be built to your specifications.

The name of the Residential Rental lot will stop reverting back to its default name.

The amount of Rent per Day now can be set with a controller on console.

Households that do not use utilities such as power and water and owe zero Simoleons will not receive messages that threaten utility shutoff.

When the Property Owner is visiting a Tenant unit on the same residential property, the Sim Picker specifies “Visit Unit...“ rather than displaying “Go Home...“

Deleting and then undoing the deletion of a shared unit wall in a Residential Rental lot that has reached its maximum unit capacity will no longer cause issues with the “Create Unit“ functionality.

Visiting the Property Owner on the same residential property will no longer state that the Property Owner is not home—they can't escape meeting you now!

Changing the name of the Penthouse Residential Rental will also be reflected in the Property Management Interface and the Lot Name headers.

“Sell Residential Rental“ is specifically used to avoid confusion with commercial businesses when selling residential property.

All versions of Oh So Floral, Oh So Fancy Tile now are shiny.

The Rent shown now is correct based on the unit size and amenities.

When renting a residential unit, a tooltip now specifies “Rent Unit“ before confirming the rental, similar to renting an apartment.

Tenants and Property Owners can now find each other in the Business filter of the Relationships Panel.

The ability to increase and decrease the panel height on console is now available for the Owned Business Panel.

The Unit Selection display for Residential Rentals in Manage Worlds now uses the D-Pad instead of L1/R1 (PlayStation) or LB/RB (Xbox) when changing floor level.

Spa Day

Short Round Nails look more natural and match the preview image.

Dine Out

Sims will drink and eat autonomously when they order both food and drinks at a restaurant. Previously, they would only drink.

Sims no longer get stuck when replacing a restaurant they are running with another from the Gallery.

Special non-playable Sims (like Michael Bell) are no longer available to be hired for restaurants.

Neighborhood Sims now leave the restaurant after completing the eating of a grand meal and will no longer wait until the restaurant is closed.

Wearing the respectable shirt and vest combo (ymTop_GP03Vest) was cutting off circulation, causing a groove to appear around the Sim's fingers. The cuffs have since been loosened and the Sim’s fingers are back to normal.

Vampires

Occult rank status for non-household occult Sims can now be seen in the Sim Profile.

Star Wars™: Journey to Batuu

For galactic safety, scheduling Events from the Calendar while in Batuu no longer is available.

My Wedding Stories

Wedding Cakes now note that only the Sim who plans the event can select the Cake.

“Call off the Wedding“ is available on both the Sim and the wedding arch while performing the vows. Never too late to call it off…until it is.

Sims who are hungry will not eat the Wedding Cake until instructed. Go eat something else!

Sims who travel to Tartosa can now successfully “Get Married to…” their partner at Town Hall.

We heard that you wanted the option to plan a wedding with the Base Game Wedding Event even when you have My Wedding Stories, so Sims now can choose between “Plan Wedding Event“ from Base Game or “Plan Customized Wedding Event“ from My Wedding Stories when they're ready to get married.

Sims now stand instead of sitting on the floor from “Please Take Your Seats“ if there aren't enough chairs.

Werewolves

The Sweater (ymTop_GP12SweaterDecal) no longer distorts at the arm for male Sims when viewing from a distance. 

Crystal Creations

When a Sim wears jewelry crafted and charged with the Fire Opal crystal on a Date, completing date goals will count 50% more towards the Date's score.

Bust the Dust

The “Filth Kills the Fun“ Moodlet now has a unique icon all its own, awww.

Sims no longer get multiple negative Dust Moodlets at the same time.

Industrial Loft

The preview image of the Johnny Zest's Sweet Revenge Sofa faces the same direction as the other couches in Build Mode.

Urban Homage

The Track Pants (ymBottom_SP50Track and ymBottom_SP50Denim) are now correctly tagged as masculine.

Riviera Retreat

All Riviera Retreat rocks are included in the Rock category in Build Mode.

Essence of Bergamot Planter now exists fully in this realm (it was semi-transparent before).

[kingofbodyrolls]

My Heart's Home (m) | pjm | two

🐴Chapter summary: Life on the ranch is hard and you keep fucking everything up with stupid mistakes.  🐴Chapter title: It's a Long Road 🐴Pairings: jimin x reader (main), jungkook x reader (only happens once in the first chapter), jungkook x OC (jessi), namjoon x OC (jessi), yoongi x hoseok, namjoon x oc, seokjin x oc, taehyung x oc 🐴Characters: female reader (isn’t mentioned by name and no “y/n”), Jimin, Jungkook, Namjoon, Yoongi, Hoseok, Seokjin, Taehyung and four female original characters. 🐴Genre/AU: ranch!au, slice of life!au, soulmate!au, cowboy!au + smut, humor, fluff, romance, slow burn and angst 🐴Rating: mature/explicit/R18 – this is mature/explicit content, so minors, please do not interact!

🐴Disclaimer: I do not own BTS or know them personally and this work of fiction is purely fictional and for entertainment purposes only. The actions and personalities described in the story do not reflect those of BTS— it’s just fiction. Also, if you would kindly read the tags/warnings before reading, that would be lovely: and if you don’t like whatever is described in the tags, just hit return and find something else to read. Thank you 🌸 🐴Chapter warnings: mention of past character death (parents) 🐴Status: completed 🥳 🐴Word count: 9.1k 🐴Taglist: @kookswifesblog @kiki-zb @babejinnie @ownthesunshine @allie-is-a-panda @glllhjh @bergandysam @13-manggaetteok

*tumblr isn’t letting me tag you! There could be a lot of reasons for that, check out this lovely post about it.

🐴Now playing 💿 “Common Ground” by Rebecca Lavelle. [Wanna listen to the serie’s playlist?] 🐴Author’s note (1): I really enjoy writing this so far. But this idea has been stuck in my head for months, so it feels wonderful to finally get it out! I’m still not sure if anyone would read this– but it’s already a gem to me. Thank you for reading!

There’s a scene in here that my lovely and wonderful friend @letjungcoook7 give me the idea to (it has something to do with clothes 🤭). Thank you so much for that Lua, I think it added some more fun to it ✨

It’s been cross posted to AO3 if you prefer to read there. Wanna see the book cover?

← previous | s.masterlist | m.masterlist |  next →

“Common ground, find common ground It is out there, it can be found Many chances, many ways Common ground, the road is laid”  - Common Ground by Rebecca Lavelle

Your original plan was to leave… But reality has a way of unraveling even the best-laid plans. Now, here you are, a week after that steamy romp with Jungkook, still in need of Jessi's elusive signature.

Surviving on the ranch proves challenging, and while your farming skills leave much to be desired, strangely, they seem to bring a spark to Jessi's mood. Amidst the hardships, you're learning to cut yourself some slack.

Calling in a favor from a city friend, a bundle of your wardrobe arrives at the ranch, despite the fact that most of your outfits are far from farm-friendly. However, you find solace in the timeless pairing of jeans and shirts—pieces that work in any setting.

However, when it comes to footwear, you find yourself lacking the rugged, durable boots that the others sport. Your feet continue to be clad in sneakers, a clear misfit in this sea of robust workwear. Despite the glaring contrast, the idea of venturing to a store to purchase a pair is pushed aside; after all, you'll be returning home soon, won't you?

As you strive to lend a hand around the ranch, the sense of being more of a hindrance than assistance creeps in, casting a shadow on your enthusiasm. It's disheartening, but you persevere, masking your frustration with a determined smile. 

The blueprint to win Jessi's favor unfolds gradually. Tempted by the notion of pestering her into signing the paper, a more rebellious approach, you ponder the likely outcome – perhaps just another swift dismissal. 

Thus, opting for a strategic route, you resolve to stay, contribute, and gradually earn your place in her good graces.

Yet, reality proves to be more intricate than anticipated. Earning Jessi's trust unfolds as a formidable challenge. Fortunately, the camaraderie with the girls injects a daily dose of humor, infusing a much-needed levity into the demanding rigors of ranch life. Their presence becomes a driving force, propelling you through the grueling tasks with shared laughter and a sense of solidarity.

But that thing with Jungkook and Jimin? 

It’s a perplexing puzzle that haunts your thoughts. Grateful for the absence of both men since that eventful barn party, you find yourself at a loss. Jimin's wounded expression lingers in your mind; his unexpected hurt leaves you questioning the depth of his emotions. 

Why does it matter to him so much, and what, if anything, should you do about it?

Jungkook's reputation as a flirtatious charmer precedes him—undeniably a heartbreaker and a fuckboy. The logical part of you suggests steering clear of him altogether, yet you can't deny the undeniable truth—he delivered an unforgettable night that still lingers in your memory.

Jimin's piercing gaze remains etched in the recesses of your thoughts, tempting you to unravel the mystery behind his somber expression. A nagging curiosity creeps in—was it solely witnessing you with his brother, or does it delve into uncharted territories? 

Frustration mounts as you find yourself pondering over these unresolved questions, all while diligently shoveling manure in the dim-lit barn.

The relentless echo of Jimin's haunting gaze has dominated your thoughts throughout the week, a relentless presence that might easily dissipate with a simple conversation. Yet, the prospect of confronting those melancholic, deep brown eyes sends shivers down your spine, and your stomach churns with trepidation each time the memory of his gaze resurfaces.

You know you shouldn't dwell on thoughts of the Park brothers, especially after learning the intricacies of their familial ties. The revelation that they are half-brothers, sharing the same father, doesn't diminish the complexity of their relationship. They are still bound by blood, and the complications of their connection linger in your mind, tempting you into a web of contemplation you desperately try to escape.

You're drawn from your thoughts by the gentle whinny of a horse, and as you glance up, you're captivated by the majestic creature in its stall. 

While your knowledge of horses is limited, the rugged breed before you exudes a unique beauty, its pristine white coat and matching mane captivates you.

Memories of your childhood flood back when you used to ride horses on this very ranch. The nostalgic recollections evoke a sense of longing. However, the prospect of mounting a horse now appears somewhat daunting; these majestic creatures seem even more substantial and imposing as an adult.

Soo-ah's words echo in your mind, urging you to reclaim the reins and saddle up if you truly wish to contribute on the ranch. 

Contemplating the idea, you sense a growing determination within, a readiness to embrace the challenge and reconnect with the equestrian world you left behind.

Jessi's voice cuts through the rhythmic clatter of your stall-cleaning routine, a sudden burst of urgency that startles you. She barrels into the barn with a sense of urgency, proclaiming, “Hey! We've got to head to Park's ranch!” 

The abrupt interruption leaves you momentarily shaken from your chores.

Your shoulders slump as you mope and question, “Now?” 

The unfinished tasks nag at you, a testament to the never-ending workload on the ranch. The sense of wanting to complete your current chore before diving into the next one hangs heavy in your voice, and the realization dawns on you that the work on a ranch is an ever-flowing river, each completed task replaced by another in an endless stream.

“Yes, come on!” Her enthusiastic insistence echoes through the barn, and with a determined grunt, she secures a saddle and snatches up a bridle, cradling them with purpose under her arm. 

As you set the shovel aside, your eyes widen in disbelief. “Aren't we taking the car?” you inquire, puzzled by the sudden need for saddles and bridles, questioning the unconventional choice of transportation for this mysterious journey to Park's ranch.

Her response is resolute, accompanied by a hint of laughter underlying her words. “No. The horses are just as fast,” she asserts, the firmness in her voice accompanied by a playful chuckle, revealing her persistent agenda to get you back in the saddle since the day you committed to assisting on the ranch. You can almost visualize the sly curve of her smile.

Shivers of both excitement and nervousness run down your spine. It's happening – you're about to mount a horse for the first time since childhood. You take a deep breath, steadying yourself. Yes, you're ready. Absolutely ready!

Jessi swings open the stall door, revealing the majestic white horse inside. 

She affectionately pats its head, and it responds with a gentle whinny, as if appreciating the attention. With practiced ease, she adorns the horse with a saddle and bridle. 

Stepping out with the horse in tow, she introduces, “Meet Marshmallow. Not only is he a serene and calm companion, but he's also perfect for beginners like you – friendly and patient.”

She hands you the bridle, a tangible connection to the upcoming adventure. As you cradle it in your hands, your gaze fixes on the magnificent white horse before you. A closer look reveals delicate gray spots adorning its coat, like nature's artistic brushstrokes enhancing its beauty.

Jessi tends to another horse, a rich brown beauty, securing a saddle and bridle. With graceful strides, she leads the horse towards you, introducing him with pride, “This is my horse, goes by the name Cinnamon.”

“I’ll help you up on your horse if you need that?” She chuckles, a teasing glint in her eyes, as if you've never mounted a horse before. 

“No, I'm perfectly capable. Thanks.” You retort, a tinge of frustration in your voice. You take a moment to gather the reins and locate the stirrup. The choice of a western saddle suddenly becomes a blessing, its size and comfort bringing a sense of familiarity and reassurance.

You stretch your left leg up, slotting your foot into the stirrup, and then firmly grasp the horn atop the saddle. Marshmallow remains remarkably still, a paragon of patience as you haul yourself up, swinging your right leg over his substantial white frame. A surge of triumph floods through you as you mount successfully, a proud smile illuminating your face as you glance over at your sister.

Her laughter rings out in congratulation as she mirrors your movements, executing them with a finesse that far surpasses your own. With a gentle push of her legs and the subtle click of her tongue, she effortlessly guides Cinnamon forward, setting a fluid and harmonious rhythm into motion.

Emulating your sister's skilled maneuver, you replicate the actions with Marshmallow, coaxing him to step leisurely out of the expansive brown barn.

Eyeing Jessi's brown hat, you playfully remark, “Hey, I need a hat like yours.” Her laughter rings out, and she quips, “I don't think it will suit you.”

Pouting slightly, you reluctantly admit she might be right. Hats have never been your forte. Meanwhile, Jessi rocks the rancher's look effortlessly with her boots, jeans, shirt, and the hat, completing the ensemble perfectly.

Her laughter echoes through the air as she nudges Cinnamon into a trot. Catching her infectious joy, you mimic the motion, urging Marshmallow to pick up the pace. The rhythmic sound of hooves on the ground makes your heart flutter.

As you navigate the trot, the uncertainty of your riding technique leaves you in an amusing predicament. Unsure whether to sit or stand in the saddle, you find a comical middle ground, hoping Marshmallow isn't too bothered. 

Jessi, catching sight of your improvised riding style, bursts into laughter.

“Are you sure this is as fast as the car?” Expressing your skepticism, you grumble while attempting to sync with Marshmallow's trot. The rhythmic clip-clop of hooves echoes around you, and you can't help but question if this equine journey rivals the speed of a car. Jessi glances at you with a mischievous grin, clearly enjoying your equine adventure.

In the midst of Marshmallow's trot, Jessi reassures you, “In trot, it's not. But if we gallop, it's just as fast.” 

As you ponder her words, it occurs to you that despite her initial urgency to reach the Park's farm, she's taking a leisurely pace, perhaps out of consideration for your riding abilities. Despite the dread of facing the Park brothers, a part of you yearns to arrive sooner, to get this over with as soon as possible.

“Let’s gallop then,” you declare, urging Marshmallow to quicken the pace by pressing your legs against his sides. However, to your surprise, nothing happens, leaving you in a momentary standstill of awkward anticipation.

“You have to sit down in the saddle, all your weight in your ass, and then press a little more with your legs,” Jessi advises, demonstrating the technique on Cinnamon. She adds a few clicking sounds with her tongue, coaxing him into a slow gallop that brings a newfound sense of excitement to the ride.

Following your sister's instructions, you concentrate your weight in your seat, anchored firmly in the saddle. As you press your legs gently, finally, Marshmallow responds, bursting into a slow gallop. The increased speed causes your hair to whip around your face, prompting you to make a mental note to braid it next time for a more practical riding experience.

Together, you and Jessi gallop through the paddocks, surrounded by the mesmerizing landscape of trees and bushes. The natural beauty here is breathtaking, a stark contrast to the towering buildings of the city. Vast open spaces stretch for miles, inviting you to lose yourself in the expansive, untamed wilderness.

As you ride, the motions become second nature, and memories flood back as if the years haven't passed. In just ten minutes, you reconnect with the familiarity of being in the saddle, as though the skill never left you.

Choosing to unleash a faster gallop, you and your sister give your horses the freedom to surge ahead across the lush green expanse. 

The wind caresses your face, setting your hair adrift like a carefree banner. In that exhilarating moment, a surge of childlike joy courses through you, reminiscent of carefree days filled with love. Memories of running in fields, playing hide and seek, and riding ponies with your sister flood your mind. The sheer nostalgia brings tears to your eyes, but you're grateful for the wind whisking them away before your sister can catch a glimpse.

As you approach what initially seemed like a quaint ranch in the distance, the truth unfolds—a vast expanse unfolds before you. The grandeur of the estate becomes apparent, with a towering two-story main house, a dedicated stable for horses, a barn housing machinery, and a sprawling structure that you suspect might be living quarters for the stable hands. The scale of the property dwarfs your own, leaving you in awe of its sheer size and splendor.

As you approach the ranch, an undeniable sense of dread takes residence in your body. 

The looming encounter with Jungkook and Jimin fills you with apprehension. Questions swirl in your mind, pondering how they perceive you – perhaps as the ‘once and done’ kind of girl. It's a misconception, not reflective of who you truly are, yet the complexities of forming a connection with someone like Jungkook, an apparent playboy living miles away, make you hesitant to dive into a relationship.

As you reach the fence, Jessi graciously swings open the gate, and you guide your horse, trotting the final stretch towards the big main house.

Dismounting gracefully, you secure the reins to a sturdy tree post, glancing at the trio of Ford Rangers nearby – a vivid blue one, a sleek black model, and a pristine white vehicle adorned with the distinctive ‘Bell Ranch’ logo. What a weird ranch name.

You stride towards the main house, ready to knock on the front door in a show of politeness. However, Jessi displays the familiarity of a long-time resident, confidently navigating the premises as if it were her own. Faced with an unanswered door, Jessi takes matters into her own hands, her voice echoing through the surroundings, “Kook! Where are you at?”

You roll your eyes, your tolerance for waiting a few moments longer evident, but you surmise this is the country way—or maybe your sister is just exceptionally impatient. Either way, you decide to go along with the local rhythm.

Your gaze locks onto a mop of blonde hair, and an instant wave of regret and uneasiness sweeps through your stomach. A dry lump forms in your throat as your eyes meet Jimin's. His smile, initially bright for your sister, fades into a closed-off expression the moment his gaze lands on you.

Impatience radiates from your sister as she taps her feet against the dirt, demanding answers. “Where's Kook?” she questions Jimin once more, her tone laced with urgency.

“In the barn fixing his bike, I’ll get him.” Jimin responds with a smile, swiftly moving past both of you. As he walks away, you can't help but admire the dirt clinging to him—oddly, he looks enticing covered in the grime. Despite his disheveled appearance, with every speck of dirt, there's an inexplicable allure. You ponder on his hands, dirty and rough, a stark contrast to how you saw him last at the party. He limps as he walks away, and you turn to ask your sister about it, but before you haven’t even spoken the words before, Jimin emerges from the barn with Jungkook at his side.

Jungkook strides purposefully, a confident spring in his step. “Back for round two?”

Your eyes widen, feeling like they might bulge out of their sockets, and a dry lump forms in your throat, making it hard to breathe. Desperately gasping for air, you fumble for words, all while witnessing Jessi and Jimin exchanging eye rolls, and Jungkook indulging in a hearty laugh that echoes from the depths of his chest.

“No, thank you,” you sputter, attempting to regain composure while a storm of emotions swirls within.

“You're welcome anytime, babe,” he teases, winking playfully. Jessi swiftly cuts in with a dismissive wave, “Enough of that,” she declares, clearly accustomed to Jungkook's flirtatious antics.

“We're here to discuss the cattle grazing in the north-east paddock. With the grass running thin, it's time to consider relocating them. How about we join forces and move them to one of your paddocks?” She crosses her arms, her business demeanor impressing you; there's an air of determination that makes you wonder if you could learn a thing or two from her.

“Oh, already? They must be hungry,” Jungkook chuckles, his hands smeared with grease and oil as he absentmindedly wipes them on his jeans.

“We're ready to lend a hand whenever you say the word,” Jimin interjects, his straightforward demeanor becoming more apparent with each word.

“I'm aiming for next Friday, sounds good to you?” She directs her question with a warm smile at Jimin, playfully scolding Jungkook with a friendly slap on the shoulder for his playful banter as he keeps making eyes at you.

“Yes, that works for us.” Jimin responds with a smile, though it isn't directed at you, and a sense of unease settles in. Is it regret, perhaps? You entertain the idea of saying something, but the setting doesn't feel right, so you choose to stay silent.

As the true purpose of this trip dawns on you, you can't help but question Jessi's impatience, especially when she's making plans for something scheduled next week. You initially thought it was an urgent matter, leaving you wondering if impatience is a constant trait in her character.

Jessi claps her hands with genuine excitement. “Great, thank you!” With goodbyes exchanged, you both stride back to your horses, mounting up and steering them towards home.

Ara sighs in exasperation, pointing at the feed packages. “You used the wrong one again!” 

One is adorned in green with crisp white text, while the other flaunts a snowy white exterior with vibrant green letters. It shouldn't be this hard, but somehow, it manages to confuse you every time. It’s a white bag with green text! Why do you keep mixing them up?

“I’m so sorry!” Apologies spill from your lips in frustration. This marks the second time, and you scold yourself silently. How could you make the same mistake again? The weight of responsibility hangs heavy; after all, it's not just about feed but the well-being of the cattle. Grateful relief washes over you, realizing that, so far, your blunders haven't harmed the animals.

As she gathers her brown hair into a playful ponytail, she throws a suggestion your way, “How about a trip into town? We're running low on feed, and I could do with some company.”

“Sure!” Your response carries a cheerful tone as you eagerly agree, taking charge of the kitchen cleanup after Ha-rin has whipped up breakfast for the whole crew.

“Perfect, we'll head out once you’re done here.” Her words float in the air as she exits the kitchen, leaving you with the remnants of breakfast to tidy up.

As you complete the cleanup, you step into the crisp outdoors to join Ara. Soo-ah has also gathered with her, forming a trio headed towards the ranch's pick-up truck—a simple white vehicle adorned with the ranch logo. “Bora Ranch?” you muse aloud, the words escaping your lips and drawing the curious gazes of the two girls.

“Yeah, you didn’t know the name of the ranch?” Ara asks you curious.

“Honestly, I've been so immersed in learning the ropes and surviving the ranch life that I overlooked the name. But hey, now I do!” With a decisive shake of your head, you grasp the door handle, swiftly pulling it open to slide into the car. 

“Wasn’t the ranch called Bora when you were a kid?” Soo-ah inquires, turning around in the front seat to catch your response.

“Nope, can't recall what it was called back then, if anything at all,” you chuckle, settling into the car seat.

The engine purrs to life under Soo-ah's control as she expertly maneuvers the car, guiding it through the ranch's vast expanse along the winding dirt road.

The two-hour drive into town becomes a delightful journey of shared stories and laughter, weaving a stronger bond between you, Soo-ah, and Ara. In those moments, you discover the genuine sweetness that resides within both of these girls, making the passage of time feel like a fleeting friendship blossoming on the open road.

As you pull into town, the anticipation builds, and the car finds its spot next to the feedstore. Ara eagerly guides you through the intricacies of the new feed brand, making a vivid presentation to ensure there's no room for confusion between it and the previous one.

As you load the pick-up truck with feed, your gaze wanders across the quaint town. It's remarkably small, dominated by a main road adorned with a handful of establishments — the feedstore, a chic salon, a boutique showcasing fashionable attire, and a charming corner cafe. Amidst these, the bar captures your attention. Its size is impressive, boasting a spacious parking lot, and despite the midday hour, a growing lineup of cars hints at its popularity. However, what truly stands out is a black Ford Ranger, its exterior, though smeared with mud, commanding attention amidst the other vehicles.

Soo-ah and Ara catch your gaze and follow your line of sight, their eyes locking onto his car. A shared look of sympathy reflects in their eyes as they turn to you. Confusion reigns for a brief moment until your eyes lock onto Jungkook, seated outside the bar, his lips murmuring something into the ear of an eager woman. In that instant, reality crashes down on you like a ton of bricks. Their pitiful expressions make sense now—he is, without a doubt, a notorious fuckboy.

A furrow forms on your brow, a moment of fleeting confusion, but then the realization hits—you and Jungkook aren't a thing. A single night together doesn't forge a relationship. You're not staking any claim, nor do you desire to. Yet, buried in the depths, a twinge of discomfort surfaces as you witness him flirt so effortlessly.

Soo-ah's comforting words echo in your ears as her gentle pat on your back serves as a reassurance. 

“Just forget him,” she advises, and you try to let those words act as a soothing balm for the unexpected sting in your chest.

A chuckle escapes your lips, a spontaneous reaction to the absurdity of the situation. The notion of dating him had never crossed your mind, making the surge of unexpected emotions puzzling. “I will,” you affirm, determined to sweep away any lingering thoughts of Jungkook with the winds of laughter.

Ara's voice carries a weight of revelation as she completes her circle around the car, dropping a bombshell about Jungkook's romantic history. “He's never been in a relationship. It's always a quick pickup, a couple of encounters, and that's the end of it,” she discloses, leaving you to digest the surprising insight into Jungkook's love life.

Her revelation lingers in your thoughts, and as you mull it over, a resolution forms in your mind: Jungkook, with his transient affairs, aligns with the rumors. You decide to tread cautiously, steering clear of any emotional entanglements that might lead to a broken heart once more.

“Let's get out of here.” Soo-ah's words cut through the tension, and she pounds on the car to redirect your attention away from the spectacle of Jungkook's seduction. You avert your gaze, feeling a mix of relief and discomfort, and climb back into the car. 

As Soo-ah drives you away from the scene, your mind races at a million miles per hour.

You draw in a deep breath, steeling yourself for the impending conversation. The rhythmic thud of your heart echoes in your ears, and your fingers tremble with nervous anticipation as you traverse the hallway towards Jessi's office. The closed door looms ahead, and you muster the courage to knock, the sound echoing your internal turmoil as you await her response.

“Yes?” 

Her voice resonates with stern irritation, and the meager courage you had gathered begins to wane. Nevertheless, you persist, pushing the door open and stepping into her office. The room is dimly lit, the yellow light flickering ominously. A sense of impending darkness hovers, and you suspect the light bulb may surrender to its fate soon. Papers and clutter cover the desk and floor, creating a chaotic tapestry. Amidst the disorder, a few paintings of landscapes with gazing horses hang on the walls—childlike in their execution. 

You can't help but wonder if Jessi crafted these artistic expressions all those years ago and if, deep down, she still finds solace in the strokes of a paintbrush, much like you do.

Jessi is laser-focused on her laptop, her gaze oscillating between the glowing screen and a stack of papers nearby. It occurs to you that she might be immersed in the daunting task of managing bills, and it strikes you that this might not be the ideal moment to disturb her. Despite this realization, you've already crossed the threshold, determined to make another attempt at securing her signature.

“I was wondering if I could get your signature…” Your sentence hangs in the air, unfinished, as she abruptly turns her head to gaze at you. The movement is so swift, you half expect her to suffer whiplash. An air of anger envelops her expression, and though you can practically predict her response, you stand there, waiting for her to articulate the inevitable refusal.

“No.” The word is a sharp, decisive blade cutting through the air. She meets your gaze with a frustrated expression, sighing as if weary from the mere thought. “Look, I know you want to sell your share. But that’s just not gonna work for me.”

You exhale a frustrated breath, irritation evident in your voice. “Can't we find some middle ground or work out a solution?”

You attempt to plead your case, but she remains steadfast, refusing to entertain your appeals. It doesn't catch you off guard, but the refusal still grates on your nerves. Why can't she just sign the damn paper?

“I've already made it clear. I don't want strangers to buy my ranch,” she declares bluntly, her voice laced with venom. Your anger intensifies as you sense the injustice of the situation. You're not interested in a share of the ranch; you just want the damn money and to move on. Why can't she simply grant you that?

“Can't Soo-ah, Ha-rin, Ara, or you just buy me out?” you vent in frustration, the anger escalating within you. This isn't unfolding as you planned—yet again.

Jessi's laughter cuts through the air, a menacing tone clinging to it. “They don't have the money. And I don't have the money for that either. Don't you think I thought of that already?” she retorts, words spat out like venom, her breath quickening from the tension in the room.

“Can’t you just loan some money from the bank and buy me out?” you plead with her in frustration. She rolls her eyes at your seemingly childish behavior, “This is a ranch. The bank is not going to loan me more money. I'm already in debt there,” she retorts, a hint of exhaustion in her voice.

Your mouth falls open in shock. The intricacies of running a ranch, especially the financial aspects, had never crossed your mind before, but now it hits you that it isn't a cheap endeavor. Exhaling in frustration, you start pacing around in front of her imposing wooden desk.

“It's clear we've reached an impasse,” she declares with venom in her voice, slamming the laptop shut. As she rises from her chair, the veins in her arms become visible, pulsating with the tension in the room.

“You might as well go, because I'm not changing my mind.” She points sternly at the door, and you can feel the anger bubbling inside you, your blood reaching a boiling point.

“Why can’t you be a good sister and let me have this?”” you ask, your anger surfacing as you clench your hands at your sides, teeth biting into your lips, desperately trying to contain words that might lead to regret.

“A good sister?” She spits back in your face, her voice dripping with venom, eyes as cold as ice. “Who the fuck are you to speak about being a good sister!” Her volume rises, accusing finger pointing at you. “I haven’t heard from you in twenty fucking years! And when I invited you to mom’s funeral, you didn’t even reply or get back to me! Some ‘good sister’ you are.” She’s almost panting as she spits rapid fire from her mouth.

You feel the urge to lash out, anger filling you to the brim, but with nowhere for it to go, it erupts as tears streaming down your face. Control slips away the longer you stand here. “I know I didn’t call you or anything. And I’m really sorry about that.” Clenching your hands, you let the tears fall freely.

It doesn’t seem to faze Jessi; she just huffs in annoyance, as if your apology holds no significance for her.

“I had my own stuff to focus on…” You begin to sniffle as you reflect on the events of just a few months ago. The pain still lingers within you, causing a visible tremor to shake through your frame.

“What could be more important than the death of your mother?” She spits back at you, her eyes piercing into the depths of your soul.

“My dad died of cancer!” You yell in her face, tears streaming down, heartbeat thumping with anger. Despite your efforts to dry your tears, it's futile. You retreat from the desk, overwhelmed by memories of your ailing father—frail, immobilized, his eyes devoid of life. It's too much, and you storm out, oblivious to the sadness etched on Jessi's face as you leave.

You dash out of the house, ending up in front of a gate leading to one of the paddocks. The need to clear your head drives you to open the gate, and you start walking, still overcome with sobs. Climbing over the hill, you notice a cluster of trees in the distance. Despite the darkness enveloping the surroundings, their presence is unmistakable.

As you tread the path, the weight of your father's recent death and the distant memories of your mother resurface. The choice between their funerals wasn't made lightly. Yet, in the end, it was clear – your dad, a constant presence throughout the years, deserved your presence more than the woman who had been a stranger for two decades.

Your tears persist, an endless stream down your face. The length of your walk is uncertain, but when you glance back, the ranch appears as a mere speck on the vast horizon, a distant point in a landscape now overshadowed by the weight of your emotions.

You discover a substantial tree log and settle down, planting yourself on it. Alone amidst the expansive embrace of nature, you surrender to the waves of sorrow, allowing the vastness around you to become a silent witness to your emotional unraveling.

For what felt like an eternity, it was only you and your father. The day he took you away from the ranch, from your sister's embrace, it left your heart in shards. Despite numerous inquiries, he kept the reason veiled until the very day he drew his last breath. With a fragile whisper, he beckoned you closer, he shared in hushed tones the painful revelation behind your abrupt departure years ago. He had unearthed the heartbreaking truth that your mother had been unfaithful, a betrayal repeated countless times despite his pleas for fidelity. It was the final, unbearable straw that fractured the fragile bonds holding your family together.

Lost in the vast expanse of time, you eventually lift your gaze, captivated by the celestial display overhead. The stars twinkle in a cosmic dance, their brilliance far removed from the city's suffocating glow. The beauty of the night sky resonates with you, prompting a twinge of sorrow. This rural haven has grown on you, its tranquility a stark departure from the chaos of the city. A sense of foreboding creeps in as the prospect of returning to the city looms, leaving you conflicted and uneasy.

Torn between the serene allure of the countryside and the harsh reality of unresolved issues, you grapple with conflicting emotions. The idyllic surroundings clash with the palpable tension between you and Jessi. Her apparent disdain and refusal to facilitate the sale of your share leave you caught in a tumultuous predicament, akin to being trapped between a rock and a hard place.

The symphony of crickets reverberates in the bushes, and as the chilly air seeps into your bones, a decision crystallizes within you – it's time to reluctantly return to the ranch.

“Get up you fool!” Jessi's voice pierces through your dreams as she yanks the covers off your still-drowsy form. Startled, you jolt upright, rubbing the remnants of sleep from your eyes.

“What’s wrong?” You mumble through a yawn, not quite fully awakened to handle your sister's early morning energy. Your eyes, still puffy from the tears shed yesterday, bear witness to the emotional turmoil that led you to cry yourself to sleep. You had purposely avoided any conversation with Jessi upon your return, convinced that the words exchanged would only add more weight to the heavy air lingering between you two.

“The cattle are loose!” 

Her urgent cry jolts you awake, prompting a hasty scramble to throw clothes over your drowsy form. “Get up and help!” The command echoes through the house, accompanied by the chaotic symphony of hurried footsteps. The urgency compels you to leap out of bed, hastily pulling on the jeans Jessi tossed your way, followed by a shirt and your sneakers in rapid succession. The echo of multiple footsteps thundering through the house only intensifies the sense of impending chaos.

You dash outside to find a bustling scene in the yard—cattle meandering at a leisurely pace, a few grazing on the lawn, and mischief-makers having ventured into the vegetable garden, creating a lively and chaotic spectacle.

Under Jessi's brisk command, you, along with Soo-ah, Ha-rin, and Ara, embark on the mission to corral the wayward cows and guide them back to the paddock. The endeavor unfolds as a symphony of teamwork, with shouts and laughter echoing through the air. It's an hour of spirited effort before the last stray bovine is safely enclosed within the fence, the collective achievement ringing with a sense of accomplishment.

Jessi forcefully shuts the gate, her exasperated exhale slicing through the tension in the air. “Who left the damn gate open?” 

Her gaze sweeps across the group, sharp and accusatory. The realization hits you like a bolt – yesterday's walk. Anxiety gnaws at you as her eyes narrow, pinpointing your guilt. 

“Fucking useless,” she mutters, striding away with an air of frustration, leaving a lingering sense of failure in her wake.

Ara, Soo-ah, and Ha-rin surround you, their words a comforting chorus dispelling the air of failure. 

“Anyone could have slipped up; it was just a simple mistake,” they assure you, attempting to soothe the lingering tension. With their encouragement, the weight of the mishap eases, replaced by a collective understanding that, in the end, all the cattle were safely corralled back in.

A gnawing sense of inadequacy settles in your chest, a relentless reminder of perceived shortcomings. It's not just about the occasional missteps—whether in riding, feed, or even a simple tire change. Or the way you seem to get on your sister’s nerves everyday. Each incident, a haunting echo of ineptitude, leaves you questioning your worth in this environment. perhaps you're the one who's out of place here, incapable of getting anything right. The thought of returning home starts to linger, a tempting escape from a seemingly never-ending string of blunders.

Despite pouring your feelings of inadequacy to the girls, their reassurances haven't managed to erase the heavy weight on your shoulders. The elusive signature from Jessi seems like a distant dream, and the strained relationship with her intensifies your desire to leave. 

Yet, when the girls invited you to the local town bar before your departure, you agreed. It's a farewell tinged with uncertainty, a bittersweet blend of camaraderie and the looming decision to walk away from the ranch.

As you rummage through the clothes in the guest room, seeking the perfect outfit for the evening, Ha-rin's advice echoes in your mind – nothing too fancy, just a simple shirt and jeans. 

Yet, your hands, tangled in the fabric of uncertainty, grapple with the realization that the perfect shirt is elusive. Did you run out, or is it merely camouflaged within the folds of your wardrobe, playing a coy game of hide-and-seek?

As the realization dawns that your entire collection of shirts is held hostage in the laundry's cleansing embrace, a dilemma unfolds before you. 

The prospect of trudging to the distant cottages to borrow a shirt from the girls seems an arduous task. Instead, a mischievous thought tiptoes into your mind – borrowing a shirt from Jessi. It's just a shirt, a fleeting thought whispers, and she probably wouldn't even notice, right?

Stepping away from the chaos of your disheveled room, you ascend the staircase, guided by the thought of borrowing a shirt from Jessi. With the certainty of her absence, you boldly push open the door to her room, revealing a sanctuary of simplicity. The regal expanse of the king-sized bed commands attention, accompanied by sparse embellishments – a poignant photograph capturing Jessi with your mom and her loyal companion, Cinnamon. A modest dresser stands sentinel next to the door, holding its silent vigil over the room.

With a hesitant curiosity, you breach the privacy of Jessi's dresser, a repository of her sartorial choices. 

Rows of jeans, shirts, and blouses reveal a spectrum dominated by natural and earthy hues – an insight into her affinity for the subtle tones of nature. A twinge of guilt flickers within you, acknowledging the intimacy and impropriety of this clandestine exploration. Despite the internal conflict, your quest for the perfect t-shirt propels you deeper into the folds of her wardrobe.

As your fingers graze the various textures, you're captivated by the softness that beckons your touch. A distinctive fabric captures your attention, and you pull out a grunge-inspired t-shirt—its black canvas adorned with shades of gray, embellished by the iconic AC/DC logo. A chuckle escapes you, a silent agreement with your choice. 

Closing the dresser door behind you, you return to your room, adorned in the rebellious elegance of your discovery, finalizing your look with a touch of light makeup.

You slide into a zip hoodie, a borrowed shield from Jessi's collection, the fabric embracing you in warmth against the crisp night air. Stepping out to the pickup, you find the girls patiently waiting, and even Jessi stands there but she doesn’t spare you a look.

You settle into the car, the engine's hum creating a rhythmic melody as Ha-rin skillfully navigates the night roads. The world outside blurs in shades of darkness, dirt dancing against the windows like fleeting shadows. Ha-rin has cranked up the heat, prompting you to unzip your hoodie.

As the car inches closer to town in the dimness, you feel the proximity of civilization, and just then, Soo-ah interjects, snapping you out of your contemplation, “Who's taking the wheel on our way back?”

A collective gaze circulates among you, and you break the silence, declaring, “I'll take the wheel. I don't plan on indulging much tonight, anyway.” 

As Jessi turns her gaze toward you from the passenger's seat, her eyes lock onto the fabric hugging your frame – a subtle frown etching across her features. “Is that my shirt?” she questions, the tone a blend of curiosity and a hint of something else.

“Yeah, is it okay—,” you begin, but she cuts you off with a scoff. “Take it off,” she demands, leaving you staring at her in disbelief. Surely, she can't be serious!

“All my shirts are in the laundry. I hoped it was okay…” you mope, a pout forming on your face as you cross your arms. The prospect of having to take it off leaves you in a momentary dilemma.

“Well, you didn't ask if you could wear it. So, take. It. Off. Now,” she punctuates sternly, leaving you gaping in disbelief.

“What am I going to wear at the bar then?” you question her with genuine worry. “I can't walk in there without anything on, for heaven's sake!”

“You're wearing a bra, right?” She asks, matter-of-factly, and you nod in confirmation.

“Then you're fine. You won't be the first to walk around in a bra in that place.” Your mouth falls open. You can't believe what you're hearing, and the realization that you're about to walk around there half-naked sinks in.

“I won't take it off,” you huff, crossing your arms tighter around your body, defiance etched across your face.

“If you don't take it off yourself, I'll pull it off you when we arrive,” she threatens, her tone stern and ominous. A nervous trickle of sweat trails down your back; you know your sister well enough now to recognize the determination in her voice. If you don't shed the garment now, she'll simply rip it off you, and with a bigger audience, no less.

“No thank you.” With a sigh, you peel the hoodie off, followed by the t-shirt, leaving you momentarily exposed. Just as you're about to tug the hoodie back over your torso, relishing the thought of having at least that to cover yourself, Jessi interrupts with a deadpan stare.

“That’s my hoodie too, isn’t it?” Her voice, stern and eyes shooting daggers at your skin, catches you off guard. Damn, she noticed that too. It seems you can’t get anything past her watchful gaze.

Reluctantly, you surrender both the t-shirt and the hoodie. A frown etches itself across your face. Here you are, left with nothing on your upper body except for a simple blue bra.

Gratitude tinges her voice as she accepts the returned clothing with a simple, “Thank you.”

You wear a pouty expression, sulking in silence, as the rest of the car bursts into laughter at the spectacle of your misfortune.

As Ha-rin effortlessly maneuvers the car into the bar's parking lot, you all disembark, greeted by a chilly breeze that sends shivers down your spine. Eagerly, you rush toward the entrance, craving the warmth that lies within.

Soo-ah swings open the door, ushering everyone into the bar, and immediately, the inviting warmth envelops your skin. The crowded room turns heads, eyes fixating on your unconventional attire. Whistles from a few men pierce the air, including Jungkook, causing a tinge of discomfort, but with determination, you forge ahead, blending into the lively atmosphere with your group.

Jessi guides you to a table occupied by the Park brothers and two other captivating men. The allure emanating from the group leaves you wondering – why does everyone here seem irresistibly attractive?

Jungkook whistles once more, his laughter echoing through the bar. “Did you lose a bet or something?” he teases, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

You roll your eyes, unfazed by Jungkook's comment, though you catch Jimin stealing a glance at your breasts. The attention makes you feel exposed, but with a hiss, you stride forward, the amused chuckles from the other girls trailing behind you. Soo-ah takes charge, heading to the bar to order drinks and offering a brief respite from the sea of eyes fixated on you.

“Well. Someone doesn’t share clothes. Apparently.” You remark with a hint of spite, directing your gaze at Jessi. She remains unfazed, nonchalantly pulling out a chair beside one of the unfamiliar men. The air thickens with tension, your words hanging in the atmosphere like a challenge.

You settle into the chair, and Soo-ah returns with a round of beers for everyone. Then, a realization dawns on her. “You haven't met Hoseok and Yoongi, have you?” she says, a spark of excitement in her eyes as she introduces you to the two unfamiliar faces at the table.

As you shake your head, laughter escaping your lips, Yoongi and Hoseok extend their hands in a friendly greeting. Introducing themselves as the reliable stable hands for Jungkook and Jimin, their warm smiles put you at ease in the lively atmosphere of the bar.

Yoongi, with his silver hair, wears an expression that hints at a perpetual lack of sleep, his tired eyes meeting yours. Clad in a simple black shirt, he offers a gentle smile while nursing his beer. On the other hand, Hoseok radiates energy, his bright smile beaming at you. His soft brown hair frames his face, falling effortlessly as he strategically averts his gaze from your bra.

You seize the beer Soo-ah passes you, savoring the first sip as the effervescent bubbles dance on your tongue. It's your one indulgence, a calculated choice, knowing you'll be the designated driver on the way back.

Hoseok's infectious chuckle accompanies his question, “How do you find ranch life?” You hesitate, torn between the weight of your struggles and the desire to keep the atmosphere light.

Opting for the lighter choice, you respond with a smile, “It’s exciting.”

But even as the words leave your lips, you recognize the mask in your tone. Hoseok, however, doesn't press for more information; he simply smiles back at you, leaving the unspoken conversation hanging in the air.

You catch Jimin staring at you again, and a subtle shiver of uneasiness trails down your spine. The intensity in his gaze leaves you questioning: Why does he keep fixating on you like that?

“Aren’t you cold?” A sudden chill envelops the air as Jimin turns his attention to you, his question hanging in the quiet intensity of the moment. Uncertain why, a shiver dances down your spine as his eyes lock onto yours. You bite your lip, offering a nonchalant shrug in response.

With a confident grin, Jungkook peels his shirt off, instantly attracting glances from a few ladies at a nearby table. “Here. You can have my shirt,” he declares, flexing his muscles proudly. Eye rolls ensue, both from Jimin and the rest of the table. Nevertheless, you accept the offered shirt with gratitude, navigating the amusing spectacle with a polite thank you.

You slip into Jungkook's shirt, instantly feeling a wave of comfort and security wash over you. It smells musky, like him.

Grinning, Yoongi playfully smacks Jungkook's chiseled chest, remarking, “Well, look who's playing the gentleman.” 

Nonchalantly, Jungkook quips, “Easier to pick up the ladies like this, anyway,” as his laughter echoes through the bar. While he scans the crowd for his next conquest, you remain indifferent, content just to have a shirt on.

Jungkook's attention quickly shifts as he spots an intriguing woman across the bar, prompting him to rise from the table and saunter over to her, leaving your group behind.

While Yoongi and Hoseok engage in conversation with Soo-ah and Ha-rin about a plan to play pool, they eventually depart, leaving you, Ara, Jimin, and Jessi to hold down the fort at the table.

Her eyes plead with you as she asks, “Is it okay if I head up to the bar? I spotted some of my friends there. I know we were supposed to have fun together, but…” The appeal is directed more towards you than Jessi, and you nod in understanding. The rest of your group has already scattered, so you don't mind her branching out.

Jessi takes a deliberate sip of her beer, her eyes scanning the crowded bar. “Actually, I see someone I need to talk to too.” With a firm grip on her beer, she strides away, leaving you alone with Jimin amidst the lively atmosphere of the bar.

You offer him a tentative smile, uncertainty flickering in your eyes. In response, he mirrors the gesture, raising his beer to his lips with a hint of intrigue.

The atmosphere feels tense, and it hits you that you haven't had a proper conversation with him since the incident at the barn party. Unsettled by the lingering tension, you take the initiative to break the ice. Nervously turning the beer between your fingers, you offer, “I'm sorry if I did something wrong.”

Jimin's eyes meet yours, a gentle intensity in his gaze, and he nods, encouraging you to continue.

In a hushed tone, you admit, “I'm sorry I slept with you brother…” His reaction is immediate, a visible flinch, and suddenly the pieces of the tension between you fall into place.

“Why apologize for that?” he questions, sipping his beer with a curious glint in his eyes.

“It just seems like you're angry with me... or something,” 

He observes, his eyes penetrating yours. You look away, unable to meet the intensity in those brown orbs that seem to be searching for something, and you're not sure if you're ready to confront whatever it is.

“Look,” he starts, leaning over the table, “I'm not really angry. Maybe I'm disappointed?” It's unclear if it's a question or a statement, but you choose to lean in, meeting his bold gaze head-on.

“You are, of course, allowed to sleep with whoever you want to. It's just... it's always him.” The words sound gritty, leaving his mouth with a hint of anger. Not directed at you, though. There's a sibling rivalry in his voice, a trace of jealousy that you can't ignore.

A realization hits you like a lightning bolt – is he jealous? Jealous of his own brother?

“All women are drawn to him. He's always fucking around. Not that I'm saying I want to be like that, but sometimes, it would be nice to feel noticed, you know?” His eyes carry a touch of sadness, and you offer him a sympathetic smile. It's evident this bothers him, and you're at a loss for words to comfort him.

As you wonder why he doesn't feel noticed—after all, the man is undeniably attractive—your comforting words hover on the tip of your tongue. Just as you're about to speak, he lets out a deep exhale, as if releasing pent-up emotions.

“You know… When I saw you that day in the kitchen after all those years,” He begins to say as he leans back into the chair, absently scratches his head, a gesture that hints at a blend of frustration and contemplation.

An awkward chuckle escapes him, his upper body swaying with a mix of nerves and genuine amusement. “I never thought I would see you again when you and your father left,” he admits, his laughter carrying the weight of unexpected reunions.

He fidgets with his beer, a bashful admission lingering in the air. “Did you know,” he confesses, “I had a crush on you when we were kids?” A nervous gulp follows, as if drowning the remnants of an old, unspoken secret.

The revelation hits you like a sudden storm. You had no idea. Is this the underlying reason for his jealousy?

You gaze at him with a soft intensity, a hint of nervousness in your own eyes. “I had no idea,” you confess, unraveling another layer of the complex emotions between you.

“I'm truly sorry,” you utter once more, the sincerity echoing in your voice. The unexpected entanglement with his brother wasn't part of any plan, and you hadn't anticipated him witnessing the intimate moment.

“It's fine,” he chuckles, though the sincerity in his tone remains uncertain. The curiosity nags at you, urging you to delve deeper into the past: Does he still harbor that childhood crush?

“Do you want another beer?” he queries, noting the emptiness of his bottle. You decline with a shake of your head, stating, “No, thank you. I'm the designated driver.” He comprehends, lifting himself from the chair to make his way to the bar. Returning with a fresh beer, he resettles in front of you.

“So, what's your honest take on this place?” he inquires with a chuckle, clearly aware that your response to Hoseok's previous question may not have been entirely truthful.

You release a sigh of frustration, sinking back into the chair. “It's tough. I seem to get on Jessi's nerves constantly, and I manage to mess up everything,” you admit, earning a chuckle from him at your candidness.

“Years have passed since you were last here. Getting back into the groove will take time, and she should understand that,” he remarks, sipping his beer. His gaze softens, and you find reassurance in his words. Talking to him feels comforting, and the strange tension that lingered before has dissipated.

Inhaling deeply, you confess, “I've been considering heading back home. It just feels like I mess everything up…”

Jimin dismisses your thoughts with a fervent shake of his head, “No, no, you shouldn't give up. Please, give it some more time.”

A contemplative smile tugs at your lips as you ponder Jimin's words, uncertain whether to heed his advice and give it more time. You're caught in the crossroads of uncertainty, lacking a solid reason to stay, yet finding a growing appreciation for the vast open spaces and the embrace of nature that surrounds you on the ranch.

A nostalgic warmth envelops the conversation as Jimin recalls a shared childhood memory. “Do you remember when we were kids and Jessi took your favorite bunny and hid it?” His laughter echoes through the reminiscence, and a vivid image of the past floods back to you. 

“Yeah! You helped me find it,” you respond, a genuine smile playing on your lips. The memory resurfaces, the two of you embarking on a bunny-rescue mission for hours, Jessi withholding the secret of its hiding place. A chuckle escapes you as the camaraderie of that moment echoes in the present.

“Jessi was so mean,” you chuckle, a playful glint in your eyes, “still is,” you add, the laughter intensifying as the enduring nature of her mischief becomes a source of amusement.

Engaging in conversation with Jimin feels remarkably effortless. The dialogue unfolds organically, and you find yourself wondering why you hesitated to talk to him sooner. It seems foolish now, realizing there was no need to be afraid of facing him.

“That she is.” He joins in the laughter, and you catch a glimpse of his slightly crooked teeth. 

As you take a moment to study him again, really taking him in this time, you notice the fullness of his lips, the endearing crinkle of his eyes when he laughs, and the way he uses his hands to cover his laughter. He looks good—no, more than that, he's attractive. His sweetness, reminiscent of the kid you remember from years ago, now magnified in the man before you. Doubt creeps in, and you begin to wonder if sleeping with Jungkook was a colossal mistake.

Author’s note(2): Thank you so much for reading! 🌸 I would very much appreciate it if you reblogged the chapter, if you liked it ✨ A small review or a comment would also mean a lot to me, and even a like. But please, don’t be afraid to let me know what you think; your kind words makes me extremely happy 💜

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[davnittbraes]

Teleportation and Blue Whiskey

Pairing: Dieter Bravo x F!Reader

Rating: Explicit (eventually)

Word Count: 1500

Warnings, etc.: descriptions of a panic attack, claustrophobia, annoying coworkers, brief description of desire for self-amputation due to shitty footwear, mention of cotton-poly blend clothing

Reader-insert physical descriptors: nothing in this chapter but hair long enough to tangle fingers in/comb fingers through in future chapters, just in case that’s not your jam

Notes: this is for @burntheedges Roll-A-Trope Challenge, I got Stuck in an Elevator with Dieter Bravo (something I wish I could actually say happened to me irl 😅) It was only supposed to be a couple thousand words for a fun writing challenge but here I am, splitting it into multiple parts, because as with everything I write it’s taken on a life of its own and has become impossible to control. Everyone hang on, I have no idea where this ride will end. Let’s go 💃🥳

There’s a headache forming at the back of your head - no, right between your eyes - nope, it’s both.

A band of pain slowly throbbing to life, wrapping your skull in the weight of ten consecutive hours of socializing with people you’d just met two days ago.

Fucking. Perfect.

This conference is going to kill you.

It’s the first time you’ve attended, and you’re definitely not coming back next year. Despite what looked like a robust presentation itinerary, the whole vibe seems to be less of an educational event and more of an excuse to spread gossip, get intoxicated to the point of obliteration, and rack up charges on company credit cards.

Who knew clinical pharmacists were such party animals.

It’s just not your scene. You’d rather be back in the hospital, consulting with other medical practitioners, patients, generally helping people, instead of shooting tequila at 3am in the VIP section of some poorly lit club you’ve never heard of.

Sighing, you shift your feet as you wait for the elevator. This pant suit feels stuffy, the cotton-poly blend scratching your skin. The shoes that look so good with your outfit are pinching your pinky toes in a way that makes you want to cut them off and be done with it. If it wasn’t for those damn pinky toes, you’d be taking the stairs - much more preferable anyway, elevators made you uncomfortable.

You’ve never liked them, always hated the inability to just get out whenever you wanted to, the need to rely on something out of your control to give you a chance to escape. And there was always the threat, the possibility that everything would fail, that the elevator would fall, plummet down and you’d be shattered into a dozen pieces.

But your feet might just rebel and call a mutiny if you try to force them up five stories.

So, elevator death-trap it is.

The hotel lobby is starting to fill up with people heading out for a night on the town, including some of your colleagues. They haven’t looked your way yet, but if they see you, they’ll definitely try to rope you into whatever shenanigans they’ve got planned for tonight.

Shit.

You push the elevator call button again, and once more for good measure.

Come on, come on, please -

The ding of the elevator pulls your attention, your aching feet moving even before the doors start sliding open, and you duck inside and out of view of the lobby.

Muzak and a soft golden light fills the small space. It’s welcome, quiet and soothing.

Leaning against the wall, you take a deep breath and let it out, eyes half closing with weariness as the doors start to slide shut. Almost there, a few floors and a dozen steps and then you can flop face forward on the double mattress your company had paid for.

The elevator stutters to a halt, doors sliding open again.

A groan almost slips out and you have to bite it back.

Fucking. Perfect.

The last thing you want right now is social interaction.

A man shuffles onto the elevator.

Your exhausted mind notes tiny details about him - the way his dark green crocs catch on the elevator door track, the frayed hem of his navy and red checked pajama pants, the bulky dark grey hoodie with the hood pulled low over his eyes so all you catch is a glimpse of plush lips twisted into a downturn. He’s carrying a couple reusable bags, well-used and wrinkled, whatever is in them clinking softly together.

He moves to the far corner and slumps against the wall, keeping his head down so you can’t even see his face anymore.

A curl of apprehension mingles with relief in the pit of your stomach.

Okay, well, you didn’t want someone who would talk your ear off on your way to your floor but you’re also not particular on sharing an elevator ride with someone obviously attempting to hide their features.

Whatever. It’s less than a minute to the floor.

The elevator doors slide shut. And nothing happens.

What -

Shit.

The elevator’s broken, you’re stuck in here -

No no no -

Your chest tightens instantly, every muscle in your body drawing up in panic.

This is it, exactly what you’ve been dreading, this elevator has stopped, and there is no escape, and -

Oh.

You didn’t push the button for your floor.

Embarrassment prickles along your skin and you lean forward, punch the number six with your thumb, probably a little too forcefully.

The man in the corner doesn’t move, but social convention prompts you to ask anyway. “What floor?”

“Hmm?” His voice is low, smooth, slightly detached as if he’s lost in his own thoughts. “Oh, yeah. I -“

He shifts the bags in his hands, digs into the pocket of his hoodie and pulls out a hotel room key card. Fingers fumbling, he steps toward the elevator buttons, hesitating just a moment before he holds the card up to the reader at the top of the keypad while pressing the button for the penthouse. The button illuminates and he quickly steps back into the corner, shoving the card back in his pocket.

His free hand tugs his hood lower over his face. “Hate those things, radio frequency waves or whatever. What’s wrong with old-fashioned keys?”

The last word clips off hard, as if he just realized he was speaking and regretted it.

Confusion blooms, and you keep your gaze forward, your expression blank.

Who is this man?

Dressed like he had just rolled out of bed, huddling in the corner of the elevator, trying not to be seen while rambling about radio frequency waves on his way to the penthouse suite?

Mentally shaking yourself, you focus on watching the numbers flash on the floor indicator above the elevator door.

Doesn’t matter who this weirdo is. Just get back to your room and try to forget about this entire day.

The steady, rhythmic white glow of the numbers is comforting, in some way. A reliable beat, marking the path to the solitude you’ve been craving all day.

2.

3.

4.

The elevator shudders to a stop.

Silence.

You wait.

The door doesn’t budge. Nothing moves.

Above your head, the lights flicker, then steady. Still.

The silence is too heavy, too much, it’s not right.

It’s actually happened, now.

The elevator has stalled, and you’re stuck in it.

Panic, hot and sharp, wells up in the back of your throat, and it takes effort to swallow it down.

Breathe. Deep breaths.

It’s okay, it’s going to be okay.

These things happen all the time.

Think it through. Use that technique from therapy - work through the next steps instead of focusing on the panic threatening to overwhelm you.

The hotel will have someone on staff to fix it - they must, a five star hotel this size? For sure they do. They have to.

They have to.

It won’t be long, maybe a bit longer if the - what are they called? - elevator maintenance person, whatever, is on a break.

But it’s nowhere near a meal time, the Whatever Person is probably not on a full break, maybe just a fifteen or something.

Yeah, okay. So once they get done their break they’ll -

“Are you freaking out? Because you look like you’re freaking out.”

The question whips through your anxiety, yanks you out of your thoughts and you sway a little, dizziness making the elevator tip as it comes back into view.

Trapped trapped you’re never getting out

“Whoa hey you - hold on -“

A hand grasps your shoulder, presses your back against the wall of the elevator.

The air is thin, it’s hard to fill your lungs and you can’t -

breathe -

“Breathe -“

Muffled voice, deep, speaking quickly, syllables skimming the surface swells of panic, pulsing in your mind with the same rhythm as your heartbeat.

It’s too fast, too loud, can’t breathe -

The world slants suddenly, your feet stumble to adjust. Heart pounding, hard, it hurts -

It’s happening, the elevator is dropping -

Too fast too loud -

It’s falling -

No you’re falling -

Crashing -

Landing on something solid but yielding -

Warm -

Your fingers grip, squeeze, hold tight. Time blinks, once, twice.

Panic freezes.

Hands. You feel hands on your body.

Large hands, soothing, gentle.

One on your back, resting between your shoulderblades, warmth seeping through your clothing and into constricted lungs, loosening tension. The ache there lessens, lungs filling.

The other hand cups the back of your head, thumb stroking small circles over your scalp. A tiny, almost insignificant motion, and it pulls your focus immediately.

Again and again, soft and soothing circles.

Breathe. In. Out. In. Out.

The white-heat of panic subsides, slowly pulling off of your senses and your thoughts run an inner monologue, a mantra, grounding you back into your own body.

In. Out. Good, just like that. How are your elbows so sharp? Ow.

Wait. It’s not an inner monologue, it’s -

The man. In the elevator with you.

It’s his words drawing you out of your panic, his hands on your body.

Fresh panic washes over you, your eyes flying open to see -

The stranger’s gaze, watching you closely, a rich, deep brown that makes your pulse skip.

Tousled brown curls falling over a brow creased with concern.

Full lips, drawn down at the corners, soft and plush and only inches from yours, parting slightly, and that voice, so beautifully comforting -

“Oh thank fuck you’re not dead.”

[the-chosen-fanfiction]

Big James | To Die Is Gain | Romantic

Dialogue prompt: “I’ll see you in heaven.”

The cost of following Jesus Christ is high, but it is worth everything, including losing your love.

Requested by J Bart

With a heavy huff, you lift the loaf out of the oven and place it onto the countertop, setting it there to cool. Behind you, five-year-old Rebecca chases her older sister Naomi around the already cramped kitchen, causing you to quickly intervene. “Ah-ah-ah, girls, if you want to play, go play in the living room or in the yard.” They heed your warning as you gesture at the freshly baked loaf. Rebecca hugs your leg as she looks up at you.

“Eema, can I have bread?” 

You put a hand on her sleek, dark hair. “Not yet, sweetheart. It has to be a bit colder first so that you don’t burn your mouth and tongue.” 

She hums and gives a little disappointed nod before turning to follow Naomi to the living room, where most of their toys are located. 

As you turn to wipe down the counters, however, you hear a shrill shriek from the hallway that is hard to identify. When it’s followed with the joyous exclamation of ‘abba’ in a way that can be heard on the other side of the street, you are instantly relieved. Drying your hands on your apron, you head out of the kitchen to greet your husband. 

“Shalom, darling.” James greets you, leaning down to kiss your forehead as his daughters cling to his sides. The older son of Zebedee smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. 

“Shalom,” you reply with worry in your voice, wondering what is going on. The tension in his shoulders tells you that his meeting with Matthew and Nathanael had been about more than simply catching up. 

You move to take his bag from him, but James quickly grabs it before you can slide it off his shoulder. He looks down at you, giving you an apologetic look. “I’m still going to need it.” 

Tilting your head in slight puzzlement, you watch how he scoops up his girls and heads to the living room, blowing a raspberry against Naomi’s cheek, causing both of them to giggle with joy. You stand in the hallway for a bit, pondering the interaction before heading after them.

James is just undoing his sandals while your daughters busy themselves with their handcrafted peg-dolls. He looks up and meets your gaze, his form slumping a bit. With a sigh, you walk over to him, crouching down in front of him in order to remove the laces from his footwear. He gives an appreciative hum as you gently squeeze his calves, sensing the tension in his muscles.

“You need to rest.” 

“I can’t. I…” 

“…Another ministry trip.” you finish it for him as his voice trails off. James nods, his gaze momentarily going to Rebecca and Naomi, who are oblivious to their father having to leave for an extended period of time again.

As his eyes meet yours, something stirs within you. A deeply unsettling feeling blooms deep inside your stomach, a wave of sudden nausea tightening your throat. You swallow away the lump that forms. 

Being married to one of Jesus’ Disciples is a blessing in and of itself, that He had called your husband personally as His student to spread the news about the Kingdom of God around the world. The fact that said called pupil had decided to marry you of all women was still sometimes a little bit of a mystery to you. Still, it didn’t make it easy. James was often gone from home. No matter the incredible reason behind it and no matter how proud of him you were, you still missed him greatly. 

It wasn’t uncommon for James to leave on a whim, with him throwing a few items in a bag and hitting the road whenever the Spirit compelled him to go somewhere. But now… This time, it was different. Everything in your entire being is on edge, your instincts heralding something… Heart-wrenching. You can’t quite put a finger on it. 

Your husband seems to sense something, too. He reaches his hand out for you to take, his fingers lacing with yours. 

“Love, I’ll be alright.” he reassures you. “Don’t you worry about me. Just take care of your girls while I’m gone. I just— I need to go to Judea. I— I am aware that my presence isn’t really wanted there, but you knew how Jesus went about these places. We shouldn’t be scared. You shouldn’t be scared.” 

Averting your gaze, you try your hardest to not cry. Judea. Herod Agrippa won’t have mercy on him.

You know you can’t talk him out of it, and you know you shouldn’t even want it. Still, you can’t help but want to at least address your sudden concern, share the looming dread starting to take root.

“James,” you whisper, your eyes brimming with tears. “I don’t know about your trip… It is this… This gut feeling that something is going to happen to you.” 

James’ face falls into solemnity as he stands from the chair. Suddenly, he looks years older than he is; he has started to look more like Zebedee over time, but now it’s more clear than ever. 

“I was hoping that you wouldn’t feel that, too.” You’re not the only one anxious for a tragic outcome of his mission trip, “If only for the reason that you’d remain hopeful for my return and use that energy for the glory of God.” 

There is something definite behind his words that makes your throat screw shut. You inhale through your nose and attempt to sound strong. “Ah, Naomi.” The eight-year-old looks up from her playing session. “Go play outside with your sister.” 

“Yes, eema.” 

The girl fetches her sibling to bring her to the other room of the house, leaving you and James alone. 

“You aren’t coming back, are you?” 

Your voice cracks. James is on the verge of breaking, gazing down at you with tearful eyes. “This is your final ministry trip.” 

“I— I might just get imprisoned, you know? I’ll just be out there, which means that I can still return—” 

“I think you and I both know that Herod Agrippa won’t be so kind to you.” you whisper.

Certainty shines through in your words, as if you are absolutely sure of what you’re saying. Your husband gazes at you, drinking in every detail of your face. There is fear under the surface, strangely coupled with a sense of peace, albeit barely present. He gulps, trying to not cry as he steps closer to you. 

“My love...” he croaks, “I don’t know what to say. If you do not want me to go on this mission trip, I will see what I can do to reschedule, or—or perhaps cancel it altogether—”

“—No.” Your voice is stern and determined, “No. I will not let my own fears and selfish desires to keep you all to myself prevent the Good News to reach them, too.” 

James’ heart clenches inside his chest. He cradles your face, a few tears rolling down his cheeks as he holds you. “You have been the biggest blessing that has ever been bestowed upon me, my sweet, faithful wife. Every day, I am so grateful to have a woman like you by my side. I thank Adonai for you every single time I look upon you.” His voice cracks as he lets out a sob. Emotion gets the better of you, too. You sniffle and muffle a strained wail as you bury your head into his chest, enveloped by his strong arms.

“(Y/n), do not be afraid.” 

“You know I will be terrified regardless of what you say, right?” 

“Do not weep for me. I will either return to you, or I will see Jesus again.” 

The sudden image of James coming face to face with Jesus in the afterlife thrusts grief through every fibre of your being for the briefest of seconds, before it makes place for solace. Even if the unthinkable happens, your husband will be right where he needs to be. 

“This won’t be farewell,” he reassures you, “It will instead be a ‘see you soon’, hm?” 

You smile through your tears. “How soon?” 

James can’t help but mirror it, chuckling lightly as he shakes his head. “Oh, here we go again, with ‘soon’.” It never gets old, even after more than a decade.

The two of you meaningfully look at one another in a silence that is only broken by the sound of your daughters playing in the other room. The eye-contact holds an entire legacy. Nearly ten years of marriage, two beautiful girls, a calling to preach the Gospel, the Name of Jesus over these lands, no matter how hostile their rulers. 

Your soft smile falls a little as you realise what it will mean for the next few years, at least for you. You try and shake the thought — the feeling it evokes — you don’t want to be egotistical in wanting to keep James close by, fathering your children, being the husband you need to support you. But it’s only human nature to feel the horrific arms of loneliness loom over you like a dark storm cloud. 

Something hits you hard inside your chest all of a sudden, knocking all air from your lungs. A simple realisation that hadn’t even crossed your mind before. 

“You won’t see them grow up.” 

Your legs nearly give way underneath you. You won’t be growing old with him. You will not see the greys in his beard and his hair. His hands come to rest on your elbows as James senses your premature grief.  He squeezes, conveying another message by just gazing down at you, eyes filled with love.

That is not all there is to it.

It is not the end of the story.

There will be comfort in little moments reminding you of him. Sunset at the docks. The scent of a fresh catch creeping through your window as the fishermen of the village haul their wares to the market. There will be the roll of mighty thunder in a warm summer storm. There will be cinnamon cakes. His eyes in Naomi’s features and his nose in Rebecca’s.

“You don’t know that yet, (Y/n).” James steps closer, cradling your face between his hands. You relish in the sensation, melting into the familiar warmth, closing your eyes to keep your emotions from taking the better of you. You commit it to memory — as if you hadn’t done so already. “I need you to remain hopeful. Can you promise me? That you will keep praising Him, no matter how tough life gets?” 

“I will.” you breathe as your eyes snap back open again, looking up at him. He smiles and nods, bringing his forehead to yours. 

“Good.” You slide your arms around his waist and embrace him. You stand like that for a while.

“When are you leaving?” 

“Tonight.” he tells you with a wavering voice. 

“So soon?” 

He gives you a wry smile, swallowing hard as he nods. “I can still have dinner with you and the girls.” he says. “I saw you baked quite the loaf.” 

You let out a shaky breath. “Yeah, I… You better bring a big piece with you on your way to Judea. We can’t finish all of that in time with just the three of us before it gets stale.” 

James exhales deeply. “I… I wish we had more time together before I had to leave again.” 

“It’s alright.” you murmur, turning to the kitchen. Your husband follows right away to assist you in laying the table. “I knew what I was getting myself into when I married you.” 

In silence, James prepares the table whilst you get the food out, reheating a previously cooked stew to go with the bread. He comes to stand behind you, placing a hand on your waist before his lips find your cheek, then the side of your neck. You can feel his smile against your skin when you squirm a little under his rough beard. “Your stews are the best.” your husband confesses, squeezing your hip affectionately. “Especially when you let the herbs marinate into it overnight.” 

Without asking, you grab a small container from one of the shelves and scoop some of the food into it. “For on the road.” you tell him. He gives you a gentle smile and tucks some hair behind your ear.

“You make me the happiest man alive, you know that?” 

The girls are pulled back inside by the scent of your famous stew and soon cling to your waist on either side of you, their little faces mushed against your torso and bosom as they watch you cook. James watches the scene with a bittersweet heaviness in his heart, observing the way you explain your process to Naomi and Rebecca who are one day to learn your recipe by heart. The lump that forms in his throat is hard to swallow away. 

Following Jesus is not easy, especially not in times like these, when his daughters are growing up and his wife needs him so. But James knows that it is nothing compared to the price Jesus Himself had to pay, that the price of sin was infinitely heavier than any other hardship taken on in favour of submitting to Him. The Son of God has proven so Himself by giving the ultimate sacrifice. James and you would gladly give your lives for Him. Even here, even now, when the two of you had everything you ever wanted and everything to lose. 

Naomi and Rebecca sit down in their chairs the moment you tell them to, each of them on their usual spot. Diagonally across from you sits James, already slicing up the bread into equal pieces lest your daughters get fussy over it, as if the loaf isn’t large enough to feed all of you for several days. You place the warm pan onto the table and scoop portions into the plates. 

Four of them. Your heart clenches inside your chest at the notion that it might just be the final time that you’re doing this for your full, complete family. You blink away your tears, not wanting to cry in front of your daughters at this very moment. There will be time for tears later. 

Dinner goes by way too quickly, but you notice James relishing in the taste of the home-cooked meal. Five, nearly six full years of having dinner with the four of you. Granted, there had been occasional gaps in between whenever James went on mission trips, but still. You had been blessed in and of itself regardless of how much time it covered. 

After your meal, it’s time to clean for a bit whilst the girls play in the next room. Your husband insists on helping you out in lieu of packing his bags. The silence between your is pregnant with looming tension. The Spirit tells you that this is no ordinary trip, but at the same time, He brings solace in the moment. 

You help James pack a few belongings, a fresh tunic, the food you had prepared for him. Once done, you sit in the living room together, watching your children play, your head nuzzled into the crook of his neck as he holds you near. You relish in James’ familiar scent, locking it into your memory, praying it won’t fade from his tunics and from your home, praying he’ll come back to you to fill your home with love and laughter.

The sun lowers and every passing minute brings you closer to your dreaded goodbye. 

Both of you feel it. Rebecca comes over to cuddle her father, as if she senses something lingering, too.

“I need to go.” James heavily breathes against your ear, the emotion tangible in his voice. You swallow hard as you hear the words you hoped he would forget to say. 

“Okay.” you respond with equal earnesty, locking away the feeling of being in his arms deep inside your mind out of fear that you’d forget. 

“Come here, my darlings.” James beckons your daughters over to his side as he stands, crouching down to their level to face them properly. “Abba has to go on another trip.” 

“Nah, really?” Naomi pouts, wrapping her arms around his neck as she sits on his knee. James nods gently and sighs.

“Really. But don’t you worry, I will be thinking of you constantly. Now you two need to promise me something, okay?” 

The two girls nod at their father. 

“Be good girls for eema and listen to what she tells you. She will teach you everything she knows about life and you better learn from her, because she is the smartest woman I’ve ever met. And whenever eema is sad and needs a hug, you give it to her, okay?” 

“Yes, abba.” They both reply in near-unison.

Your vision blurs with tears at his words.

“Now I’m going to say goodbye to eema in the hallway. She will come get you when it’s time to wave at me.” 

The two children nod as they go back to their playing, not truly understanding the gravity of the situation. They expect their father to come back home, and you wouldn’t have it any other way. 

The moment you and James step into the hallway, you fall into his arms, sobbing against his chest as the tension suddenly breaks. His lips are on your forehead as he shushes you, rocking you through your premature grief about him as tears roll down his face. “My love.” he breathes, “My love, do not remain in your mourning about me. I am not yet gone. And it isn’t said that I will be.” 

“We are both feeling it, James, I—” 

“—I know. I know.” 

He holds you as you cry. You don’t know for how long you two stand there, but your cheeks are red and raw when you’ve got no tears left to spill. You wipe your face on your sleeve and sniffle before inhaling James’ scent deeply. One last time. 

“I will wait for you.” you promise.

“And if it is what the Lord wants, I will come back to you. If it is not what the Lord wants… I’ll see you in heaven, alright?” He thumbs away your tears and looks down at you with affection and devotion. “This life is just a speck compared to what we will receive when we are back with Him. This will pass, too.” 

You try to hold onto that knowledge, tuck it away inside your heart and mind. You nod and sniffle, then hug him again.

“We will meet again,” you whisper more to yourself than to James, “No matter the circumstances, no matter the location, but this is not farewell.” 

“That’s right.” James hums, “And until then, I’ll think of you and our beautiful daughters. I’m so proud of you. Now… I really need to go.” 

You hum and step away, watching how he puts his bag over his shoulder. “Do you have everything you need?” 

He nods, cupping your cheek. “I think you triple-checked.” James knows you too well. You smile and sigh. 

“Girls? Come wave at abba with me.” 

James opens the heavy door. The stars have already come out and litter the sky. Naomi and Rebecca exit the living room and instantly rush over to their father, who hides his tears from them. “I am going to miss you so much.” he whispers with a wavering voice. “Be good, okay? Keep trusting in the Lord.” 

The two girls nod before their father kisses each of their foreheads. He then stands again, reaching for the door knob. Rebecca reaches her arms up for you to pick her up, and you hoist her onto your hip. Your other hand comes to rest on Naomi’s head as she hugs your side. 

“I’ll see you soon, my love.” James says. You smile softly at him as he crosses the threshold. Plausibly — most likely the final time he ever will. 

“Soon,” you emphasise, the two of you holding a moment of meaningful eye-contact. 

He gives you a soft look, then looks down at the girls, back up at you, before starting to walk away. The three of you watch him grow smaller in the distance. “Soon.” You murmur to yourself, your heart clenching inside your chest as you feel it start to break with every step he takes away from you. 

You hug your daughters a little closer. The price of following the Lord is a heavy one to pay. But Jesus is worth everything. In the end, it will all click into place, just like the way God had intended it to. And all you can do is trust Him in that, unconditionally, without fear.

[lovableapocalypse]

part of the band | bassist!remus x fem!reader

marauders band!au

word count- 2.2k

warnings- swearing, fluff, probably some bad grammar and spelling i just churned this out after class

a/n- i had this idea in my head so i feel like this is no plot head empty vibes but its cute and i love bassist remus & will def write more of this universe

i do not give anyone permission to copy my work.

Watching them from the side stage will never get old, but there’s something about being in the actual crowd that you enjoy so much more. None of the boys have spotted you yet and understandably so. The crowd was thick but you’d still managed to get up pretty close to Remus’ side of the stage. 

You’d told him you were going to be late to the show mostly because you wanted to stay in the crowd tonight and not hear any of the guys’ bitching. They liked having you on the side stage so no crazy fans would bombard you and because they could easily see you. While you understood their testament, you also understood being a fan first. 

You showed up when the doors opened, grabbed your vip pass from the box office and headed to the crowd. Sadly for you the boy’s head security, Moody, spotted you and nearly dragged you backstage. You begged him to let you stay and he easily gave in to your puppy eyes and pouty lips. He led you closer to the barricade before heading back to his spot in front of the stage.

You pulled your phone out and skimmed your messages when you heard the girls beside you whispering quite loudly. You heard your name mentioned and glanced beside you. They shifted their eyes away and tried to play it off which made you laugh. You and Remus were pretty popular in the band's fanbase. You’d known the boys for ages and had even helped produce certain tracks with them. Their fans had coined you as the “it couple” of the band- Lily and James coming in a close second if not for their on again off again habit.

The said drummer and his girlfriend were enamored with each other and it seemed to bite them in the ass sometimes. You’re sure they would be the fans #1 otherwise. You weren’t sure why they loved you and Remus together so much. Part of you thought it’s because Remus is the supposed mysterious quiet one and you provide more content of him that they want to see. 

The girls were laughing nervously and you politely say hello and strike up conversation with them. You figure you’re going to be here all night and if you were them you’d want a nice interaction too. 

As the crowd files in and the room gets louder you completely befriend the girls. As you’re chatting about comfortable footwear for concerts you feel your phone buzz again. 

Remmy: Txt me when youre otw x 

You feel guilty for lying but you really did just want to watch the show from the crowd with no objections. You hear the crowd’s volume rise and realize the opener is heading on. You shoot back a quick ‘Ofc xx’ and shut off your phone. 

The girls you’ve attached yourself to smile and shout for the opener, and you can’t help but grin. Luckily not many other people have recognized you in the crowd and you feel a bit annoyed at the boys for thinking fans would ‘bombard’ you and not let you enjoy this.  

The opener is great and you all sing and dance along. They head off and you feel the crowd grow more intense awaiting the boys to come on. 

Sirius, the band’s frontman and lead vocals has been really entertaining the crowds this tour and you’re honestly proud of how well he’s been performing (and behaving). The boy’s have really grown into their roles and it’s amazing to see them all come together on stage. 

You’ve watched them go from recording in their dorm room all the way to renting studio time for weeks on end, and it’s bittersweet to see all these people here to support them. Your phone buzzes a few times and you wince as you read the messages. 

Remmy: Openers just finished

Remmy: Gotta turn my phone off soon, see you after?

Remmy: Be safe x 

As you read these another shoots through that doesn’t make you feel any better. 

Siri: quit making moony nervous

Siri: get here soon yeah

You sigh and tell yourself you’ll just stay in the crowd till the encore so you can see him before  they go back on. You shove your phone into your back pocket and glance around at the crowd again. 

The crowd cheers as the lights dim and you scream along. It feels so amazing to be a part of the crowd again and experience things as one. You can see their silhouettes moving across the stage and you grab the girl’s hand next to you and cheer along. 

When the lights fully illuminate on the stage the crowd erupts. You included. As you’re cheering you can’t help but laugh at Sirius’ smile. You see James wave as he moves to the drum set and Peter quietly moves to the guitar at the other end of the stage. Peter was always more quiet and just did what was suggested to him. It annoyed Sirius endlessly at times, but Peter seemed content staying out of the spotlight. 

Your face splits into a true grin when you see Remus adjust his bass and put his in-ears on. He’s laughing at something James said into the mic and Sirius rolls his eyes dramatically. James plays the opening sequence and the band plays one of their hits right off the bat. 

You’re shouting the lyrics along and feel fucking amazing being in the crowd again. The song comes to an end and the fans cheer enormously. Sirius laughs and addresses everyone, “What a good looking crowd here tonight, huh.” You laugh at his flirtatious self. Sirius makes conversation about the city and such but you're not paying much attention. Remus is messing with his tuning and chords and you can’t keep your eyes off him. He looks so fucking fit. His hair is messy and he’s flushed from the stage lights and you feel yourself falling in love with him all over again. 

The second girl you befriended shouts over to you, “Remus looks so cute!” You laugh and shoot back, “I know right!” 

The band starts the next song on the set list, a list you know all too well seeing as you helped create them for the shows. You dance along and lift your hands as you sing the words. The song comes to an end and the smile on your face hasn’t faltered once. As you glance at the boys again you feel eyes burning into you. When your vision passes over the middle of the stage James is sending you a shit eating grin. Fuck. He raises his brows at you and you shake your head back. You have no idea how he spotted you from his seat and you mentally curse him and his big ass glasses. 

He laughs but the next song starts and his attention is taken. You try and enjoy the song but you keep glancing at Remus to make sure James hasn’t said anything. As soon as the song ends you see James lean into the mic by his shoulder. You mouth ‘don’t’ at him but even if he saw it he doesn’t acknowledge it. You watch him speak into the mic and thankfully he’s spoken to the boys through the stage mic so the crowd hears nothing. You see Remus quickly glance to the side stage so you assume James mentioned your attendance, but not whereabouts. Then James opens his big mouth again and you see all four pairs of eyes move to you. 

Peter laughs lightly and Sirius huffs a laugh as he shakes his head. You finally glance to your boyfriend and send him a weak smile. You can’t read his expression but then Sirius occupies your attention, “Hope the crowd enjoys this next one.” He smirks at you as he also speaks into the stage mic and the opening chords to your personal favorite song of the band’s play. Of course. This song is rarely on the set list and now you understand what Sirius said into the mic. 

You try your hardest to just enjoy the song but Remus’ eyes haven’t left yours. You finally decide to not let them dampen your mood or your favorite song, so you scream the lyrics louder and hold your boyfriend’s eyes as you dance more sensually. He looks away clenching his jaw and you see James laugh at him from his drum set. Remus rolls his eyes at his best mate and finally cracks a small smile as he looks back at you. 

You smile back and the song ends. As he plays the closing chords he mouths ‘hello’ at you from the stage. You mouth it back and blush. 

The show goes on and thankfully the boys don’t bug you too much throughout. They keep sending you smirks and playful looks, but selfishly you think it’s more cool to experience it from the crowd. 

When you realize the next song is the last before the encore you turn to the girls beside you and say goodbye. You take a few pictures with them as the song starts and wave goodbye as you walk away. 

You maneuver your way through the crowd towards the security lined up by the backstage. You show them your pass and id and head to your normal side stage view. The song comes to an end and Sirius thanks the crowd for a wonderful show and the boys take their instruments off. 

They wait for each other and head over your way. You can’t help but bite your lip as Remus approaches you and takes out his in-ears. He’s more disheveled and sweaty from being on stage and he looks amazing. He smiles as he reaches you and tosses his head back lightly. You laugh and reach your arms out for him. 

He wraps you in a sweaty hug, but you don’t mind seeing as you got sweaty yourself in the crowd. 

“Pit monster herself,” Sirius laughs. 

“Piss off” you reply and roll your eyes. 

Remus hugs you closer and whispers into your ear, “Surprised me when I saw you down there.”

You sigh and respond, “I know, I’m sorry I didn’t say anything I kinda just wanted to be in the crowd for once again.”

He nods his head and presses his lips against your neck. “I’m just glad you’re here.” You blush at his words and he pulls out of the embrace. He keeps his arm around your shoulders as you address the rest of the guys. 

“Probably could’ve stayed there the whole time if James didn’t have such a big mouth.”

Said boy laughs and gives you a look of false confusion, “Oh, you saw that?” 

Sirius and Peter laugh and you feel Remus chuckle against you. “You’re such an idiot” you say to James. 

A techie comes around and announces a 2 minute warning for the boys. They all grab some water and head back to the stage. Remus leans down to kiss your lips when Sirius grabs his shirt collar, “No kisses for her.” You scoff and flip him off as he pushes Remus in front of him. Remus laughs and sends you a look of sympathy. 

The boys jog back onto stage and the crowd screams. Now you wish you’d have just stayed down there. As if he can read your thoughts Remus catches your eyes and you share a knowing look. 

The boys end the show with their most popular songs and it really is amazing. You dance and sing by yourself and watch the boys finish strong. They wave to the crowd and thank them and Remus is the first to head back to you. 

He loosely grabs your chin and lifts your face as he catches your lips. He kisses you sweetly and smiles against you. He lifts his head and looks down at you. “You did look hot in the crowd though.” You smile but it’s rudely interrupted when James says “Don’t give her ideas Moony.”

You shoot him a playful glare and the boys laugh at your expense.

Later that night at the afterparty you were checking your socials when you see the two girls you met in the pit post the pictures of you all. They were honestly so cute, so you like and repost them. You’d had a bit to drink and were feeling ballsy so you figured might as well follow them and commnet. You left a sweet ‘these are so cute dm me them!!’ on one and ‘thanks for making me feel normal and not like a loner in the pit tn’ on the other. You laugh as people start to respond to the comments and fans realize you were in the crowd tonight. 

“Maybe you should stay in the crowd more often.” Remus muses from over your shoulder reading the comments as well. “Hmm. I feel like I’ve been saying that for awhile” you tease. He smiles at you and catches you in another kiss. “Just don’t tell Sirius” he laughs. “God, never” you respond. 

He grabs your hand and you dance, together, Remus pressing kisses into you wherever he can.   

[justaghostingon]

The Cult of the Fox

A Genshin Au based off a dream i had

In an alternate reality where the forest rangers don’t exist - they did once but the acdemia shut them down for one reason or another

Tighnari is being primed to be the next grand sage after his master Nephis can finally retire

Unfortunately for him, Tighnari suffers an excistencial crisis when he realizes this isn’t what he wants to do with his life, and decides to ditch the academia and run off into the forest to live as a hermit

Life as a hermit is pretty good, Tighnari finally gets to interact with the ecosystem he’s been studying, taking notes of how it all works and how the withering has been affecting it

But the problem is this: the people traveling theough it are all idiots who are disrupting everything!

Tighnari keeps having to rescue them, then lecture them on proper forest safety. It should not be this hard to tell mushrooms apart!

What’s worse is that Tighnari’s charisma and common sense leaves such a deep impression that people start seeking him out, getting into more danger just so he can rescue them and give them advice

It seems even in the forest, Tighnari cannot escape his popularity

Naturally this concerns Cyno, whose experience with people living off the grid is almost exclusively the criminals trying to hide from him

So he too seeks tighnari out, only to spend the entire time getting lectured about proper footwear in the rainforest as tighnari makes him makeshift shoes

Cyno leaves, very confused with a new pair of boots

Clearly this man is a master at misdirection. He needs to be better prepared

So he researches Tighnari again, and once again notes that no, he didn’t break a rule, and no, he nephis doesn’t know what happened, no, tighnari didn’t have any kind of concening medical record to explain why when he suddenly up and left.

All in all, he’s back to square one.

Meanwhile, Tighnari has discovered he has neighbors. Now he can’t see these neighbors, but he can see proof that they were there. It appears aranara are real after all

He mentions this to one of his most common rescuees, (a man whose returned to thr jungle no less than 25 times, and always makes the stupidest mistakes, tighnari didn’t even know there were 25 crocodile pits a man could step in) who instantly takes it as truth

Thus this rescuee, and head of the hermit tighnari fanclub, takes this news to the other fans, and they all start spreading it around as gospel

People start leaving things for aranara like they used to whne they were kids, it becomes a whole spiritual movement, focusing on faith, nature conservation, and crutially, a rejection of the acdemia’s rigid way of thinking

The academia does not like this, and so punt Cyno at the problem again like he’s a pokie ball.

Cyno is conciderably alarmed by the “cult” but he still can’t find anything damning on tighnari. If anything he seems more like an oblivious figurehead. A very handsome, and charming figurhead.

A charming figurehead thst happily goes on and on about his discoveries about thr withering and aranara…and oh no. He’s falling for the trap isn’t he?

Regaining his senses, Cyno confronts tighnari, and upon his confusion, deems him completely innocent, and warns him about people using him

He also leaves promising to come visit and play TCG, cause Tighnari’s had no one to play with and that is a crime

Concerned about what his so called fan club have been doing, Tighnari leaves his forest to head to their headquarters in the nearest village hoping to smooth things over and put a stop to all this nonsence

A huge crowd comes to hear him speak

Tighnari gives them all a lecture about following others blindly, deliberately walking into dangerous areas without protection, and…did they ever think about bow their actions were affecting the environment?

He leaves the meeting thinking he’s solved the whole thing, but in reality he’s just made it worse.

Because now the fan club has a goal: a goal to preserve their beloved hermit’s forest at all costs

Tighnari wakes up from his hut to find s whole crowd of eager people begging him to teach them how to properly takr care of the forest

And its not like tighnari can refuse that right? Teaching is one of the few things he misses from the academia.

Thus does Tighnari’s cult become the next generation of forest rangers, to the great confusion of the academia and sumeru as a whole

Tighnari doesn’t mind. He likes this way better than being a sage

The end

[sneaker-hotwife]

As I watched you slip your feet into those stunning brown pumps, I was captivated by the way the nylon of your pantyhose interacted with the smooth leather, creating a delicate and alluring swooshing sound.

Witnessing your heel finding its place within the shoe brought forth a mix of emotions within me. While I felt a sense of protection and elegance in seeing your feet adorned in such beautiful footwear, a part of me longed to witness the entirety of your graceful feet.

The subtle exposure of the top of your feet when you wear pumps and pantyhose is an indescribably alluring sight, one that stirs within me an intense and overwhelming longing. Your choice of footwear and the way it adorns your feet never fails to evoke a deep sense of desire and admiration within me. Your every step is a graceful dance, and every glimpse of your feet in those pumps becomes an unforgettable, breathtaking moment.

With all my love and adoration!

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

@potatoshoe related to tags on the following reblog

I really resonate with this, honestly

I've been gradually recovering from major health issues for several years now. I actually just had a first session with a new physio this morning for the first time since relearning how to walk. It was really good. It hurt like a sonofabitch and my body has been moving so much better ever since. But it's hard. I leave my house a few times a month, and in my personal life I have very little regular interaction.

The thing about restriction is that if it's imposed long enough, it becomes self-perpetuating. The longer we've been cut off from having our needs reliably met, the less we are able/willing to reliably meet our needs. And so many of us have learned to feel personally ashamed of that spiral for one reason or another.

I grieve a lot about how many of us experience the world through that restriction.

[happinessismusic]

This compilation in Tiktok gives a good glimpse of the awesome performance of No Doubt in week 2 at Coachella from the perspective of someone in the crowd and not through the livestream. It also shows how Gwen interacted with the other band members. To me, there was no difference from how she interacted with them in week 1. Her voice was much stronger though in week 2 and she showed her professionalism through a wardrobe malfunction, issues with her in-ears and footwear. She is truly an icon. Unique and incomparable. 🙌🏼

[clownin-all-around]

Hello Clownblur!!!

I'm an employee at an animal shelter and we've recently run into a problem. The shelter I work at, which does not house or keep clowns (we don't have the space, money, or resources), was recently "given" a handful of young clowns, i.e. someone brought them all into our building on leashes and dropped them and ran before we could object. Stupidly, my co-workers and I decided to keep them, despite knowing next to nothing. So, I need you guys' help. I don't know anything about caring for clowns.

This is one of the girls that was brought in. She didn't have a name on her collar, but someone decided to call her Oliver, and she seems to like it. What breed is she? She likes striking poses like in the picture above, but she isn't very vocal. More pictures and info below the cut.

She doesn't mind the camera at all, and she isn't shy. She also very friendly and enjoys following us around. She's very forgiving as well; one of the bosses accidentally stepped on her boot (I do know clowns hate it when their footwear is scuffed or damaged), but she didn't get upset in the slightest. She follows instructions well enough, but gets bored pretty easily. She interacts well with the other clowns as well as the animals we keep. Her favorite food is sour gummy worms.

Does anyone know what kind of clown she is? We're doing our best to get her and the rest proper housing. We've ordered a few standard large bouncy houses to put out back, but we want to make sure that we're doing things right so that these guys are happy and healthy. Any info helps!

[cosmiclion]

Hi, fren! Since O!Ciel is still old enough to remember his human parents in your Kuro familiar AU, this might be a silly question…but (due to the way child logic sometimes works) does he ever assume that he’ll develop demonic traits since Seb is his guardian now (i.e. asking his parent when his own fangs/claws/red glowy eyes will come in)? Or try to paint his nails black so that he’s matching with his dad/mum?

Hello fren! You know, I had never considered this, but your question actually made me think about it 🤔 While I'm no expert on how children's minds works, I've had my fair share of interactions with small kids, plus I was a small kid myself once and I remember what it was like, and BOY did I have a wild imagination. Like, to give just one example, when I was that age I used to think a "life insurance" was some kind of magic spell which prevented you from dying 😂 If our Phantomhive babey isn't much different from other average kids his age, then I don't think it's much of a stretch to assume his young mind would come to a "Sebastian is my parent now, therefore I'm their child, they're a demon, therefore I'm probably gonna turn into a demon myself" conclusion, especially if we keep in mind the influence of factors like living in a world where magic is very real, Sebas looking like Vincent and thus looking very familiar to him, etc. He probably even heard some people at some point comment that often adopted kids end up taking after their guardians in a lot of ways even if they aren't related by blood and he took it literally, bless his heart 😭 (I know I would've come to a similar conclusion at that age so again, not very unrealistic lmao). Sebas then has to sit down and patiently explain to him that no, he won't develop cool demon powers, and assure him that he's still special in his own way 🥺

About the nails, oh yeah he definitely does that 🤭 I already headcanon him as pretty gnc and kind of a fashionist (I mean, that's also not much of a stretch considering how he dresses in canon, like even if it wasn't intentional... Yana your character looks gnc as fuck) and in this AU I love the idea of him having a fascination with Sebas's genderfuckery and wanting to match them. It all starts with him shily asking his demon to paint his nails so that he can at least pretend to be a cool pretty demon, then as he gets older he develops a liking to high heeled footwear and starts wearing more elaborate outfits (Nina Hopkins couldn't be happier, finally a male client who isn't awfully boring!).

Bonus a sketch because you inspired me 🙈

[verefex]

Skylark

Short story (17 pages) of Lark meeting Sky, the titan. Featuring the most clever ship name ever

SFW, giant/tiny interactions. Read under the cut!

An electrifying, booze-filled night full of loud music and stumbling drunks is how a true rooftop party goes. Nearly every Friday night, you can hear the hum of cheers combined with the boom of the bass at the top of the cityscape. Strobe lights dance on the neighboring windows, reflecting a kaleidoscope of glimmering colors. These parties are all the rage, not just because the liquor is so abundant it flows like water, but patrons are often dancing in close quarters to none other than a colossus of a person; a titan.

Why else would these festivities be held on the summit of a tower? Standing at over 100 feet tall, with footwear larger than a bus, being at ground-level while a massive man steps to and fro with no notice of other party-goers is just asking for someone to be flattened.

Fortunately, titans are more than just giant humans; their origins date back for centuries where humanity revered them as powerful gods. Nowadays, their presence is more casual, mingling and merry-making with their tiny human friends. Supposing a human did get in the way of a titan’s foot, they will live to tell about it so long as the giant wills it. How great their size, strength, and mystic talents are.

No one is really sure just where the giants get their divinity from, and collectedly their origins are mysterious. Even the titans themselves are incognizant of their genesis, which has prompted earnest research on the subject.

One such titan enthusiast, a vivacious scientist by the name of Jung, often attends events with various titans to become more acquainted with them and the humans they associate with. While it may seem flippant to relate research to drinking and dancing on a giant man’s hand, Jung has no doubts that his methods of obtaining research material are impeccable.

On one such occasion, in the city of Horizon, Jung was going about his usual business. Drinking, dancing, flirting, the tall dark-haired man was having a great time. He had brought along a friend as well, an old classmate of his by the name of Lark. While Jung was off socializing, Lark stood in the corner of the boisterous rooftop, sipping a cocktail while she faced the opposite direction of the majority of the patrons. This was not only her first time going to such a party, but also her first time being in the city of a titan. Indeed, she knew about their existence and had caught glimpses of the giants in the distance as they traverse the landscape with lengthy strides, but never in very close proximity.

The titan that inhabited Horizon city, and who was also present at the party, was named Sky. Standing at 130 feet tall, this friendly colossus of a man was often eager to interact with humans. His fair skin with barely a blemish contrasted handsomely with his black hair, and dark sideburns lined his jaws. The color of his eyes matched the inside of his mouth, as blue as his namesake. He was quite a spectacle, towering over the boisterous rooftop of dancing, singing humans no bigger than his finger.

Not one of the humans batted an eye when Sky’s enormous hand hovered over them, gentle fingers spreading as he picked up an unconscious drunk and set them on a comfortable couch. The presence of a giant was so commonplace in Horizon that this was no extraordinary feat, and the other party-goers paid no heed. Except for Lark, who couldn’t even muster the courage to move closer to the railings lining the roof.

Jung, in the thick of his merry-making, eventually noticed his wallflower friend and sauntered his way over to her. He sat himself on the couch beside Lark and threw his arm around her shoulders, pulling her into him as he held a drink in the other hand.

“Hey girl, you not having fun? What’s wrong?” He blurted as he gave his timid friend a firm squeeze with his forearm.

“I’m having a lot of fun.” Lark lied, wincing at her tactile friend’s embrace.

“C’mon. Didn’t you want to finally meet a real live titan? He’s literally standing over everyone.” Jung said as he craned his head back and pointed at the looming head of Sky.

Lark did not follow his gaze. Her cheeks became pink as she clutched her drink in both of her hands, which was mostly just ice by now.

“I know…” Lark murmured as she fiddled with her straw. “He’s hard to miss.”

“Yeah, especially if you don’t even take a shot! C’mon girl, I’ll introduce you to him.” Jung gave her shoulders a squeeze as he stood up a little too quickly.

“N-no, that’s okay… I’m sure he’s busy with everyone else.” Lark whined as Jung beckoned her off the couch.

“Naw, naw, he’s just chilling with us, he’s cool. C’mon.” Jung snapped his fingers at the fair-haired woman as she reluctantly followed him.

“I-I’m not even dressed up for this place…” Lark peeped as she was led through the crowd by her gregarious friend. She looked down at her red zip-up hoodie, khaki shorts, and black high top sneakers; more street wear than anything to her. She would have dressed up, but her visit to Horizon was rather spur of the moment, and the party even more so.

As she looked up, through the booms and cheers of the crowd dancing in the middle of the rooftop, her eyes widened at the sight of the giant. His head was tilted back, a perfect side profile before her as he took a couple swigs from a can larger than a phone booth. Lark felt her heart drop as she took in the size of him; the mere height of him from the shoulders on up was dizzying already. She couldn’t even think about looking up at him from ground-level, over 100 feet of mountainous man towering over her.

Lark’s blue eyes couldn’t get much wider. She found herself transfixed on the giant as he downed several sips of his drink before leveling his head and slowly turning his attention towards her and Jung.

It was then that Lark realized she was afraid; very, very afraid, of giants. Seeing them from a distance was nothing compared to the terrifying reality of being so much smaller than this colossus of a being. Glowing, blue eyes fixated on the pair as Sky studied Jung, leaning in just a little closer to see him, before softening his expression and smiling.

“Hey, Jung. How’s the party?” Sky said, though his voice boomed nearly as loud as the music blaring over the speakers.

“Oh it’s bumpin’. I got a plus-one this time, me and her studied together back in undergrad.” Jung stood underneath the giant’s gaze as he gestured to Lark, who lagged behind him as if using her friend as a place to hide behind.

Lark jolted as Jung turned the giant’s attention towards her. His gaze stupefied her, and she stood motionless as Jung stepped to the side and introduced her.

“Lark, this is Sky. Sky, Lark.” Jung beamed as he gestured from enormous face to quivering body. “Hey, Sky, Lark! Skylark! How cool is that?” The man laughed out loud as he stepped behind Lark and squeezed her shoulders affirmingly.

Lark’s head started to spin the more this interaction went on. Just looking up at Sky’s expansive face was making her dizzy. And then he looked right at her, and raised his enormous hand over the railing. Long, log-like fingers stretched towards her as Sky turned his fingertips upwards.

“Nice to meet you.” He boomed.

This was nothing more than a friendly gesture, a handshake on a colossal scale. Ordinarily, a human would place their hand on the titan’s fingertip and the two would briefly shake, one with just the finger and the other with their whole arm. However, to Lark, who was not aware of this gesture, vastly misinterpreted it as a motion to snatch her entire being off of the ground.

“N-no!” Lark shrieked as she backed away quickly, bumping into Jung as she tumbled backwards in recoil. Jung and Sky both stared at her in shock as she tripped backwards, regained her footing, and ran hurriedly back inside.

Sky brought his hand back to his face, watching the scared woman run from him. He examined his hand, brows furrowing quizzically.

“Oh… goodness.” Jung sighed as he nervously ran his fingers through his hair. “That didn’t go as planned.” he uttered as he glanced up at Sky, who was still looking at his hand.

“Sorry, Sky. She’s new here…” Jung said as he leaned on the railing in front of Sky. The titan put his hands in the pockets of his jeans and gave his small friend a smile.

“It’s fine… I didn’t mean to scare her...” Sky rumbled as he carefully glanced in Lark’s direction, catching no sight of her.

Lark, meanwhile, was huddled in the bathroom. Sweat and tears moistened her pink cheeks as she ran her fingers through her short, blonde hair. She shuddered as she recalled the looming, giant hand of the giant. Though it was terrifying for her, she caught a glimpse of his confused face before running away in abject terror.

“Oh no…” She whimpered, balling her hands into fists as she rocked back and forth in the bathroom. As frightened as she was, the titan’s feelings were also hurt. How could she possibly go back out there and face him, now?

Later that evening, the party was starting to wind down. Several daredevils jumped into Sky’s glass from the balcony, which was more of a common occurrence than one might think. Putting their full trust into the towering titan that oversaw the party often led to trouble when it came to mind-numbing drinks. Luckily, Sky fully expects these things to happen, and is quite relieved at the end of the night when everyone is too tired to jump off the roof into his not-quite-ready hands.

The dark-haired giant waved goodbye to the last of the patrons as he headed home, treading carefully through the dimly-lit streets. He walked cautiously, stepping one foot in front of the other in the empty roads, the width of his sneaker nearly the same as the asphalt strip.

Despite his careful way of moving through the city, his immense footsteps still rumbled nearby windows and quaked scattered debris into storm drains. If it weren’t for the residents of Horizon city being quite accustomed to having a titan around, there would undoubtedly be screams coming from the lofty apartments.

The night was still, the city slept, and the giant yawned. His home was not far off, especially for his long stride. Sky’s residence was an enormous concrete bunker, nestled in the hillside covered with leafy trees. Building a living space for a giant was no easy feat, especially one that was above-ground. Many years ago, humans built these bunkers for the titans to shelter and live in if they so chose.

Sky walked up to the door of the bunker and punched a few numbers on a keypad. Heavy metal pins within the frame released, and the door swung inwards, revealing a dark, cave-like interior. The giant man entered his home and shut the door, taking care to watch the floor as the gargantuan door swung shut. While he enjoyed the company of humans, he has had too many close calls with little enthusiastic fans trying to sneak through the closing door.

The titanic titan was beat. He winced as he sat down on the ground and started to untie his shoes. “Ugh… I have got to start sitting down more at these things.” Sky muttered as he took off one of his shoes, sighing when he realized he had been on his feet for hours, standing next to the rooftop to be with the partying humans. Ordinarily standing for long periods of time would be less of an ordeal if you’re not like Sky, who happened to weigh over 2 million pounds.

Sky started to take off his other shoe, but not before noticing something moving in his pant leg. He gripped the end of his pants at his ankle and tugged on it. A small object brushed the back of his bare leg, which prompted the giant to shake it out.

None other than Lark fell out of his pant leg. Astonished, Sky froze as he watched the little human tumble down the back of his shoe and onto the ground. Lark floundered on her back before scrambling up onto her hands and knees, eyes wide as she trailed her gaze up the giant’s body before meeting his. The two locked eyes for a moment, and the room was silent.

Sky did not speak. He felt shocked, annoyed, and the lingering buzz of alcohol swirling in his head. The giant merely narrowed his gaze and waited for the trespasser to say something.

Lark couldn’t believe it. She did not intend to be seen or caught by the titan, at least not until morning. She had such a brilliant plan earlier, in her drunken stupor, to hitch a ride on the man’s massive shoe until he reached his home. Well, in actuality, it was Jung’s idea. He claimed to “ride” the titans in this way often as a means of quick travel, and he was more than happy to urge Lark to do the same.

As it turned out, it was more of a bumpy ride than she anticipated, with thousands of pounds of mass quaking every footstep. She had no choice but to climb into his pant leg, which was slightly less tremulous than his shoe, but did not give her the visibility to keep an eye out for her stop.

Now she was sobered up and faced with the terror of staring up at the monolith of a man, who sat on the floor with one shoe on and one shoe off. Her limbs shook under his gaze, and she had half a mind to prostrate herself and beg for forgiveness.

“I-I… I…” She stammered through chattering teeth. None of the words she formed in her head were coming out of her lips. Her voice came out like a little squeak, further emphasizing her mouse-like nature and size in comparison to the giant, shuddering in his shadow.

Sky took notice of her trembling, and his gaze softened. From the look of her clothing, she seemed to be Jung’s friend that he met at the party. Well, ‘met’ was an overstatement. His reaching hand sent her running before they could exchange words.

“...Hi there.” The titan uttered as he placed his palms on his thighs. He leaned over her just slightly, mindful of his movements, keeping them slow.

Lark watched his movements from her vulnerable position at the base of his foot. The giant’s loud, yet gentle voice filled her ears and caused her to sit up, rocking onto her heels in a low kneel. There was no hint of anger in his voice, yet she dreaded what might come next.

“...Hello… um…” She breathed, chest heaving as if his looming body above her was suffocating her. Her words became lost and she just stared up at the mighty man.

Sky tilted his head slightly at her. He had never quite seen a human so deeply affected by him in this way. Perhaps this was how all humans were when they first met the titans, he thought. He breathed in deep and exhaled before speaking again.

“Did you mean to hide in my clothing like that?” Sky spoke lowly, gently. “You could have gotten really hurt.”

Lark glanced around her. Sky’s leg arched over her, the crook of his knee almost directly above her head. A dizzying sight that made her want to turn heel and run, but the giant’s polite manner of speech kept her somewhat calm.

“I just… wanted to apologize to you personally.” Lark gasped, forcing herself to cease her trembling. “But I didn’t know where you lived… so I just climbed on… I didn’t think you’d notice.” She half-laughed, realizing how foolish she sounded.

Sky looked at her with an amused grin. “Apologize? For what?”

“Oh… well, for getting scared, I guess…” Lark peeped, feeling even more foolish. “I shouldn’t have ran from you. You’re Jung’s friend, after all… I…” She stammered as she lowered her gaze, then fumbled in her pocket for her phone. “I should call him, h-hang on…” The nervous woman said as she patted her pants and jacket pockets.

“Shoot, my phone!” She blurted as she looked along the ground for her cell phone. Crawling on her hands and knees in the dimly-lit bunker, Lark searched with no luck.

Sky leaned down and scanned the floor for a sign of a tiny phone. He let out a puff of breath as he realized before she did that her phone probably fell out before he entered his home. He reached into his back pocket and pulled out his own phone, a rather dated design with modular buttons and a small screen, a billboard-sized device.

“It’s fine. I’ll text him.” The giant said calmly as he flipped open the keyboard and typed on it. Lark stopped her searching and looked up at him, even more astonished at seeing the enormous gadget.

“...I, oh… you don’t have to, I’m sure mine’s around here somewhere…” Lark said as she watched him tap the buttons.

“I got it. He’s probably worried about you.” Sky said as he glanced down at the curious little woman at his foot. “You look exhausted. You can stay here for the night, if you’d like.”

Lark’s eyes were wide. “Stay… here?” She said rather quietly, looking around the enormous bunker. It was very dark, except for two rod light fixtures on either side of the room. She could barely make out a row of cabinets, a sink, and a table with two chairs from her position on the floor of a giant kitchenette. The rest of the interior went on further, but the lights didn’t illuminate that far.

“Yeah. I can’t really bring you anywhere right now, not at this time of night. And roads don’t come up to my place, so if you have a ride… they’d have to walk quite a ways.” Sky said as he slowly swung his leg away from Lark and took off his remaining shoe. He stayed seated on the floor as he looked down at the confused little human on the concrete.

“I… well, that’s… very kind of you.” Lark said, still in shock. Admittedly, she didn’t quite plan for what she would do after apologizing to the giant. Especially not at 1 AM.

Sky nodded at the polite little woman. “Yeah, it’s no worry. Sorry for scaring you earlier, by the way. If I had known that you never met a titan before, I wouldn’t have gone for a handshake.” The giant chuckled, flexing his feet in his socks.

Lark realized she was still sitting on the cold floor as Sky apologized to her. She stood up suddenly, shaking her head with an embarrassed blush. “N-no, it’s fine! It’s uh, it’s more of a me thing. I’m not sure what came over me… I just thought for sure you were going to… grab me.” She bit her lip.

Sky raised an eyebrow at her. “Oh?” He mused as he leaned closer to the shy woman. “Don’t like the thought of being in my hand?”

“Ah… t-the thought didn’t even occur to me. I just saw something big coming towards me…” Lark gasped as she again stared up at the looming giant. She could tell that he was amused by the situation, and she did her best to hide her fears. The sheer height of him just sitting down was dizzying to her.

“Hmm. You know, I’m so used to humans being… used to me.” Sky rumbled as he tilted his head at the tiny woman standing on his floor. “So I don’t want to traumatize you, Lark. Are you going to be okay if I stand up?” The giant said as he nodded towards the wall behind him. “I need to turn on the lights.”

Lark was quite thankful that Sky was so accommodating. She almost forgot what she was even scared of, until he mentioned standing up. She looked down at her own feet, then up at him, realizing that she would be at ground level, looking up at a towering titan over 100 feet tall when standing.

She started to feel dizzy at the thought of it, but it’s not like she could tell him what to do in his own house. Lark nodded and brought her hands up to her chest nervously.

“O-of course. I’ll be okay.” She lied, thoughts racing as she scrambled to mentally prepare herself for what was coming.

Sky took her words at face value and slowly stood up, drawing his towering legs towards him as he rocked forward and planted his heels on the ground under him. His titanic form was now hunched over Lark, who didn’t dare move from her place on the vast concrete floor.

Sky couldn’t help but smile to himself as he looked down at Lark, who couldn’t peel her eyes off of him. Even from his lofty position he could tell that her eyes were as blue as his, wide and wavering in his shadow.

The world shrank as Sky slowly rose up on his legs, standing at his full 130 foot height, nearly reaching the ceiling of the enormous interior of the bunker. Though he stood still, Lark could feel the weight of him through the ground. Micro-tremors pulsed underneath her as the giant’s mass settled onto his heels, and she felt her head spinning, spinning, until everything was black.

When she awoke, she was no longer on a hard, concrete surface. Lark groggily lifted her head, feeling her body sink into something soft.

She had been laying on Sky’s bed, tucked neatly under a blanket. More specifically, she was on one of his pillows, and beside her rested the giant himself on the other side of the massive bed.

“...Sky?” Lark said as she sat up, cheeks reddening as she looked at the massive, sleeping face of the titan. He was resting with his head on his forearms, still dressed in his jeans and hoodie as he laid on his stomach, facing the pillow that Lark was placed onto.

Lark leaned forward, studying his sleeping face. He looked as if he had just nodded off, though she had no idea how long she was out for. She stiffened up as she realized that he must have picked her up and carried her here after she fell unconscious. Her heart fluttered as she imagined how that might have gone, him bending down and plucking her off the floor with those massive fingers.

The woman bit her lip as she glanced around her, utterly dwarfed by the giant’s pillow. Much like a wedding ring in the middle of a silken cushion, her entire being was encompassed by soft, white fabric. She couldn’t imagine a bigger bed, save for the actual mattress Sky himself was laying on adjacent to her.

Suddenly, the giant’s eyes blinked open, and an immediate look of relief came upon him when he saw Lark sitting up, awake.

“Oh, thank god.” He said as he raised his head up to look at her. “I wasn’t sure how long you were gonna be out for.”

Lark’s breath caught in her throat as she stared at the no-longer slumbering giant beside her. His face was close, very close. She could almost feel the warmth of his body emanating off of him.

“I… did I pass out?” Lark asked.

“Yeah. About oh… 20 minutes ago.” Sky said as he glanced at the clock. “I’m sorry, I had to pick you up to bring you here. I couldn’t just leave you on the floor.”

Lark bit her lip and looked to the side. With the main light on inside the bunker, she could see more of Sky’s place. The inside looked like a large-scale studio apartment, built with industrial-grade concrete and rebar. Not exactly homey, but at least the bed was comfortable.

“It’s okay… thank you, Sky...” Lark said as she turned back to face him. As she looked up at his hulking face, she remembered why she blacked out in the first place. “Ugh…” Lark groaned as she pinched the bridge of her nose. This giant must really think she is hopeless.

Sky let out a short laugh. “Do you have vertigo?” He asked as he tilted his head at her. “You looked up at me and just… kept going. Fell flat on your back. Would have had a nasty bump if I didn’t fix it.”

“I might have vertigo.. that would explain a lot.” Lark replied. “Wait, what do you mean ‘fix it’?”

“When I picked you up, I healed your head.” Sky said matter-of-factually. “Yeah, I don’t know how it works, either. I can heal humans by my touch.” The giant shrugged, then covered his mouth as he yawned.

“Huh…” Lark mumbled as she watched him yawn. She felt herself tire as well, and couldn’t help but yawn in succession.

“I think it’s time for bed. Is this comfortable enough for you?” Sky smiled as he nodded to the pillow that surrounded her little body.

Lark blinked and looked around. She certainly was comfortable, but this meant that she’d be sharing a bed with a titan. “I… yeah… is this okay?” She blurted. “S-sharing a bed?” Her face blushed.

“It’s hardly sharing a bed. You’re on my pillow.” Sky rumbled as he leaned to the side, pulled the blanket out from under him and shimmied underneath it. “Not like you take up space, you know. Don’t worry… I won’t bother you. I’ll stay on my side.” The giant grunted as he rolled over to the other end of the bed and settled under the covers.

Lark was too tired to argue. She was quite comfortable on the giant’s pillow, covered by the thick edge of a huge blanket. It had been such a long night of travel, partying, and riding in a giant’s shoe. Sky’s gentle yet assertive way of speaking gave Lark no reason to complain; she was just happy to have a safe place to rest after a night of drinking.

“O-okay!” Lark peeped as Sky reached over to the bedside lamp and switched it off. Suddenly the room was almost completely dark, and only the sound of Sky’s breathing reminded her that she wasn’t alone.

“Goodnight.” The giant rumbled, and Lark replied back with a hasty “Night!” before settling down under the covers. Sky rolled onto his side, his enormous back facing Lark. He had shared his bed with humans before, so the situation didn’t bother him. In his mind, as long as he stayed still while laying on the bed, she would be safe from getting crushed.

Lark, on the other hand, found it difficult to sleep. As comfortable as the gigantic pillow was for her, she couldn’t get over the fact that she was in bed with a giant man. She glanced over at his hulking, sleeping form, and sighed wistfully. She laid her head back and looked at the far away ceiling, longing for her own room that wasn’t so vastly oversized. The huge underground room was cold, even with the blanket covering her.

The woman shivered as the night went on. Sky seemed to be in a peaceful sleep, completely unmoving aside from the swelling of his breaths in his enormous lungs. His massive body did not seem bothered by the chill of the air, much unlike the little human on his pillow.

Lark, unable to sleep or to get warm, decided to crawl closer to the giant. She figured it would be warmer, though how close she was daring to get was still to be determined. The shivering little human slid off of one pillow and started climbing onto the next one, upon which rested Sky’s head.

In the darkness, Lark could make out the large, dark form of the back of the giant’s head. His sleek, black hair was hard to make out in the darkness, but it looked soft and warm; perfect for Lark to snuggle into.

The woman hesitated, however. As she scooted closer to Sky’s head, she looked up at the top of his skull, which was easily twice her height. Though he hadn’t moved at all tonight, what would become of her if he rolled onto his back? She’d be completely smothered, flattened against the pillow.

Lark nervously glanced around, scooting backwards to see more of the massive man. Any other part of his body would be just as dangerous to cuddle up against. She tried to imagine the best place to be on the sleeping giant; there had to be a place for her to get warm and also be safe from getting crushed.

As she was brainstorming the next step, she was startled when Sky suddenly spoke.

“Are you cold?” He rumbled without turning his head.

Lark scooted herself backwards. Was he awake this entire time? Or perhaps her small self woke up the giant by pitter-pattering around his head?

Regardless, she replied with a resigned “...yeah.” It was late, she was tired, and frankly had enough of scuttling on the oversized bed.

Sky smiled to himself. He had a hunch that Lark would eventually scoot her way closer to him overnight. As timid as she was around him, at least this meant that she wasn’t as terrified as their initial meeting.

The giant kept still as he reached up to his shoulder, bringing his hand into view of the little human beside his head. He beckoned her with his finger as he spoke. “Come on over here.”

Lark stared at his huge hand, fingers draped across his wide shoulder and steep neck above her head. Did he really intend for her to climb over him? His mountainous frame? The small woman opted to skirt around his huge head instead. Sky waited patiently for his little friend to make her way to his front, wobbling her way along the indents of the pillow. He laid still on his side and soon the blonde woman stepped in front of his vision, pushing her way past the fringe of his hair.

The two made eye contact for a moment, and Lark awkwardly looked away, taking in the length of his body laid out before her. His frame seemed even more vast, covered in an enormous, thick blanket.

“I’m sorry, I guess it is pretty cold in here for a human.” The titan uttered as he lifted his head up, adjusting his view so he could see her more clearly. “I just wasn’t sure how close you’d want to be to me.”

Lark hugged her shoulders as she stood under the giant’s gaze. She looked down at her feet as he spoke to her. “No, I appreciate it. Honestly, you’re… a lot more accommodating than I expected you to be. Like… not only are you huge, but you’re so… popular? It’s like all the people here know you, and here I am… a total stranger in your house.” She said quietly, unable to look the titan in the eye as she spoke.

Sky couldn’t help but chuckle. This was the closest look he had of Lark so far, and to him, she was quite cute. He liked her shy personality, even if it meant going slower with her than the usual humans he interacted with.

“Aww. I’m not really that popular, humans just like to be around titans.” Sky smirked at her. “Well, some do. Are you still scared of me?” His blue eyes were focused on the little human on his pillow.

“I… I don’t think so.” Lark said, still averting her gaze.

“Then…” Sky chuckled. “… feel free to come closer, and get warm.” The giant said softly as he raised his arm and gestured to himself.

Lark finally looked up to see the titan gesturing to his huge body, and her cheeks flushed. It was as if he was offering himself to her as a luxurious, heated bed.

“Um… ah…” She stammered, hesitating at the sight of his vast being. Where to even begin? She felt so vulnerable before him, and yet he was just laying there, presenting his huge and warm body. Her arms gripped her shoulders tighter in hesitancy.

“It’s okay. Just think of me as a big teddy bear.” The giant giggled and lowered his head back down on the pillow, watching her in amusement.

Lark nodded slightly, daring to take a step closer. She eyed his face, his chest, both so broad and imposing. If he truly was a giant stuffed bear, this would be no problem. But the fact that he was indeed a towering titan of a man made it hard for her to picture it.

Sky could see her hesitating, and had to stop himself from reaching out and pulling her close. He could tell that she wanted so badly to huddle up to him and warm her little body up, but having never encountered a titan so close before… perhaps she didn’t even know where to begin.

“Do you want a suggestion?” Sky asked her softly. “Crook of the neck.” The giant smiled as he tilted his chin to reveal his neck to the little human. “You can also just crawl into my shirt collar from there.” He patted the base of his neck invitingly.

Lark’s face got even more red as he did so. Never did she expect herself to be so close to a giant; even though she was really just getting warm, to her it was becoming something more than that.

“O-oh, um… okay.” She peeped and slowly made her way closer to the giant man’s neck. He was wearing a black hooded sweatshirt, with a thick collar that hugged his neck and kept it very warm. Admittedly it all looked so comfortable, and Lark’s exhaustion and lack of warmth made her stumble forward and lean against Sky’s throat.

All was quiet as Sky practically held his breath, keeping himself still as his tiny friend adjusted her position. Lark’s curious little fingers touched his bare neck as she sighed happily, feeling his body heat permeate her senses. A smile crept on the giant’s lips, the fluttering of her bashful self against his sensitive throat made his chest warm.

“You’re so small…” The giant uttered in a breathy tone, mostly to himself. But Lark’s proximity to his larynx made her jolt.

“Excuse me…?” She squeaked, feeling the gentle rush of his breaths through his neck upon which she rested her head.

“I just. I dunno. You’re really small.” Sky uttered, her little body against his neck making him acutely aware of their difference in size.

“Are… are you just now realizing that, Sky?” Lark half-laughed, feeling very sleepy. His gentle breaths were very soothing to her ears.

“Kinda.” Sky said as he smiled and pulled his blanket up closer to his chin. “As much as when I picked you up off the floor earlier when you were an unconscious ragdoll.”

Lark’s eyes widened at his words. She suddenly imagined how she must have looked, limply draped across the giant man’s palm. The fact that she wasn’t even awake for that gave her mixed feelings.

“Ah…” She muttered, feeling her cheeks continue to warm. She was glad at least that he did pick her up, or else she wouldn’t be with him on his bed.

Sky giggled at her shy response. “I hope you can get some sleep at least. It’s really late.”

“I know… I’m really tired, but… I guess cuddling a giant is too interesting for me to fall asleep.” Lark admitted, taking care not to move around too much and tickle him.

“Aww. Well I couldn’t just let you freeze.” The titan chuckled. “I’m glad you snuck your way in here, though. Still not sure it was the best idea but...all things considered, I appreciate that you were so dedicated to setting things right.” Sky said sleepily. “Not that I was upset or anything to begin with, but I was hoping to get to know you after Jung introduced you to me. Especially after he told me that you’re new here.”

Lark listened to him speak, blushing a little when she realized that he was interested in her in some sort of way. She grabbed the collar of his hoodie and pulled it closer to her, pressing her back into his neck for warmth.

“Do you… bring humans into your bed often?” She asked timidly.

“Sometimes.” Sky chuckled, tucking his chin down and touching the top of her head with the bottom of his jaw. “It’s nice to have a little snuggle buddy. I’ve accepted the fact that being a titan means essentially becoming a warm bed for tinies.”

Lark giggled. This giant really was like a big teddy bear. She couldn’t believe she was scared of him before.

“Tinies… is that what you call us?” She asked softly, feeling her fatigue getting to her.

“Mmm, yeah, collectively you’re all just tiny little things. Tinies. It makes sense to me.” The giant yawned. “But tonight, you’re my tiny.” Sky uttered to the shy little woman in his collar.

Lark’s face, previously pink, suddenly turned red. His words of possessiveness caught her off guard.

“I… uh…” She stammered, gripping the edge of his collar tight. Never had she felt so small in her life. Despite being shorter in height than most people, the difference in size was nothing compared to this man’s mountainous form.

“Sorry, I’m mostly kidding.” The giant laughed. “I don’t want you to think that I’m trapping you here. I am enjoying your company, though.” Sky said as he reached up and stroked the edge of his collar beneath Lark.

“I-I am too…” She replied, feeling the rustle of his finger against the fabric. She took note of how careful he was being with her, especially with his hands. “This is all just so new to me… but I’m having a good time.”

“I’m glad… you know, I don’t know if you have any plans after the morning, but you can hang out with me if you want.” The giant uttered to the tiny human snuggled against him. “I got nothing going on. And again… you don’t take up much room in here.”

Lark gripped the end of his collar tightly as he spoke. She was having a hard time believing her luck. After having traveled all day to get to Horizon City per Jung’s request just to meet a titan at the party, only to end up in his massive bed with him at 2 in the morning. And now that he was asking her to stay longer, she had no reason to refuse.

“Wow, uh… that would be… that’s very nice of you, Sky.” She stammered.

“It’s no problem.” The giant rumbled sleepily. “Knowing Jung, I’m sure he’ll be busy anyways.”

“Yeah… admittedly it was his idea to get in your sneaker after the party.” Lark bit her lip, recalling their conversation after her exuberant friend found her in the bathroom.

“Of course. I knew it.” Sky sighed with knowing smile. “He would be the type to convince someone to climb my shoe. He’s done it himself multiple times.”

“Really? Yeah, that seems like him… but I don’t even really know what he does for work...” Lark peeped from the giant’s collar.

“Oh, he just… gets to know titans in ways most people wouldn’t.” The giant rumbled in amusement. Sky was surprised that his little friend hadn’t fallen asleep, yet.

“Wha…” Lark yawned, feeling her eyelids flutter, too tired to comprehend his words. She fought herself to stay awake, but the comforting heat of Sky’s neck coupled with his soft sweatshirt collar and rumbling breaths practically lulled her to sleep.

“I think it’s time for bed.” Sky chuckled as he slowly reached his fingers up towards his collar. “Are you comfortable where you’re at?” He asked the sleepy little person huddled against his neck.

“Mm… I am…” Lark mumbled as she glanced up at the vast expanse of the giant man’s neck. She couldn’t imagine a more pleasing amount of warm body heat around her, coupled with an endless expanse of clothing to snuggle into.

“Well… I’m not. I’m gonna roll onto my back, so just stay put.” The titan said softly as he pushed the tips of his fingers into his shirt collar where Lark was tucked into, gently securing her in place as he carefully angled himself from his position on his side to his back.

Lark blushed as she was gently but firmly held in place against the giant’s neck. Soon she was laying directly on top of him, rather than leaning against that expansive wall of flesh. She laid there, frozen in place, hearing Sky’s breaths rush through his windpipe as he sighed in satisfaction.

“Alright… that’s better. You just get yourself comfortable… I won’t move.” The titan rumbled as he laid his head back on the pillow and draped his arms across his stomach. Ideally he would have laid like this in the first place, after picking up the little human and placing them on his chest. But Lark was different… she seemed to have an aversion to those giant hands of his. Though it was tricky, Sky had no problem changing the way he interacted with Lark. The last thing he wanted to do was scare her, and to him, having her snuggled under his collar without picking her up was a job well done.

Lark’s tired eyes started to close. The giant’s words reassured her that she would be safe, and it had been such a long night. She reached down and grasped Sky’s jacket collar and pulled it up to her chin as she settled down on his neck and drifted to sleep without another word, pacified by the sounds of his low, deep heartbeat.

The two of them slept peacefully. As Sky promised, he slept on his back through the night, and by morning, Lark was still snuggled up where she fell asleep. The titan was the first to awaken, blue eyes flitting awake in the dark bunker.

“Mmm…” he mumbled as he blinked himself awake. He became aware of the tiny, warm body in his jacket collar, and realized that Lark was still sound asleep in the crook of his neck.

Sky smiled warmly and laid his head back gently. His chest rose and fell as he breathed, allowing himself a little more time to wake before turning the light on by his bed. He glanced down, trying to get a look at Lark. He could feel her tucked under his shirt, just above his collarbone, where his throat was softest… not moving, still very much asleep. The titan couldn’t see her from his point of view, as much as he tried.

He was quite pleased that she was still sleeping. The giant reached over slowly and flicked on his light, then decided to get up. Sky reached up to his collar and picked up the edge of it, folding it lightly on top of Lark. He pushed his fingers into her from the outside of the fabric and pinned her in place as he sat up on his bed.

Lark made a soft little noise as he did this, but still did not wake. Her tiny hands balled into fists and she nuzzled her face into Sky’s neck, which made the giant smile. He found her to be quite cute when she was asleep. His fingertips gently pushed against her middle, the two of them nearly half of her size.

The titan swung his legs over and stood up, feeling the need to stretch. However, with one hand keeping Lark in place, he could only alternate between the two arms as he raised one over his head, then replaced his hold on her in his collar before stretching the other one.

Sky then walked over to his countertop, which was quite bare. In fact, the giant did not have for himself food or dishes or silverware of any kind. He did, however, keep an array of human food on hand for his tiny guests.

The massive man kept his hold on Lark in his shirt as he bent down and glanced at what was essentially a miniature kitchen on the expansive countertop; fully functional with a fridge, stove, and cabinets.

“I wonder if I have anything that’s good…” Sky muttered as he peeked into the little fridge, spying some eggs, a carton of milk, and various condiments. He would have loved to cook breakfast for his little human friend before she woke up, but the ingredients were simply too small for him to handle. With eggs the size of pinheads, there would be nothing left of them if he decided to crack them between his fingers.

As he was looking over the miniature space, it was then that Lark finally stirred awake. Completely covered up by the giant’s collar, the little human awoke in darkness. Confused, she pushed out at the cloth surrounding her, feeling Sky’s enormous fingers on the outside securing her in place.

Oh, right. She was in a giant’s shirt. She had nearly forgotten this glaring detail, but just hearing the man’s deep breaths around her brought it to her attention.

“S-Sky?” Lark squeaked, flailing in the darkness of his hoodie. She was completely covered up, unable to see what was going on.

Sky glanced down and instinctively removed his hand from the collar, giving her room to breathe. “Hey, Lark… woop!” The giant exclaimed suddenly as the tiny woman, unaware quite yet that he was standing, started to slip down underneath his hoodie.

Lark let out a yelp of surprise as she slipped down, quite quickly, past the giant’s chest. The light above her disappeared as she was enveloped in layers of clothing, trapped between Sky’s hoodie and t-shirt. She felt like she could fall endlessly along the titan’s expansive body, but eventually a solid object came down upon her and halted her descent.

Sky clapped his hand against his belly, stifling a laugh as Lark nearly managed to tumble halfway down his jacket before he caught her. “Geeze!” He uttered as he cupped his hand around the wiggling little woman under his shirt. “I got you…”

Lark’s eyes were wide. “T-That’s one way to wake up…” She squeaked as she flipped herself upright, steadying herself by bracing against the titan’s stomach. Her heart pounded in her chest.

“You okay?” Sky asked as he held her in place, not daring to move. The last thing he needed was for her to fall further down and come out of the bottom of his shirt.

“Yeah… uh…” Lark uttered as she looked around. “How do I get out of here?” She asked timidly,

mind racing as she realized she was pinned in place.

“That won’t be a problem. As long as you let me hold you…” Sky said as he looked down at his middle. He kept his hand in place, doing his best to keep Lark calm. After all, she was quite literally trapped in his jacket.

“Oh… um, that’s fine.” The tiny woman could feel her heart pounding as she leaned forward against Sky’s stomach and gripped his shirt fabric. She wondered if the titan could feel her own, tiny heart, nearly jumping out of her skin.

He could, and the woman’s nervousness put him on edge. He took a deep breath to steady himself as he carefully reached under his shirt with his other hand, cupping it below Lark. He removed his other hand and let the little human drop down and land in his bare palm.

And just like that, Lark was in the hand of a giant. She tumbled down shortly and landed on her rear in the middle of a man’s hand that was easily twice her size. Her breath caught in her throat as Sky removed his hand from under his jacket and held her out in front of him. The giant looked down at her tentatively, watching her movements closely.

“… there you go.” Sky uttered cautiously, holding her as steady as he could. The little woman in his hand felt so warm, so light. One precious little life.

Lark shuddered, looking up at Sky. His chest filled her vision, a massive wall of a body spanning before her. Yet beneath her, the man’s hand was steady. The woman’s hands gripped Sky’s palm as she glanced around her, with the giant’s fingers at her back and his enormous thumb beside her.

She was utterly speechless. This weightless sensation, her entire being suspended in the air, held aloft effortlessly by this titanic being… it was overwhelming, to put it lightly.

“U-uhhh…” She shuddered, blue eyes as wide as dinner plates as her whole self was laid out before the massive man, who eyed her closely. She had spent the night sleeping on top of him, and yet… in his hand, all she could feel was small.

“It’s alright.” Sky uttered suddenly, making Lark jolt. “I won’t drop you.” His face softened as he brought his other hand up and cupped it underneath, securing his hold even more.

Lark bit her lip as she took in his words. His gentle, reassuring words… though she wasn’t even sure if that was what she was afraid of, or if she was truly afraid at all.

“It’s just… you’re so big…” The woman uttered as she covered her face in her hands. She was starting to feel faint again, just taking in the sight of Sky from his palm.

“I am…” Sky said in agreement, peering at the nervous little lady. “Does it scare you?” He asked, unsure of what kind of response he was expecting. She was clearly apprehensive about the whole situation.

Lark peeked out at him through her fingers. His face, though gigantic, was gentle. He looked as though he enjoyed holding her in his hands, despite her uneasiness.

“Well… no…” She uttered, gazing up at the titan. “I’m not really sure what to think, to be honest… I’m not scared, I’m just… wow.” Lark said with uncertainty. “Like… you’re just holding me... everything I am fits in the palm of your hand.”

Sky tilted his head at her curiously. “Oh? I suppose that’s true…” the titan moved her closer to his face, cupping her in his hands softly. “But that’s just what it is… you’re like a little treasure.” The giant said quietly, unable to stop himself from smiling at his own mushy words.

Lark stared at him as he spoke, feeling rather touched by what he said. “A treasure…?” She uttered softly as she returned his gaze, feeling her chest flutter. She couldn’t quite tell if this was the titan’s way of flirting, or if he meant it more literally. Nevertheless, as he lifted her up closer to his face, Lark couldn’t stop herself from blushing. She just hoped that she was too small for him to notice it on her cheeks.

Sky could feel her tense up in his hand as he said this. He let out an awkward chuckle as he narrowed his gaze. “Y-yeah. Something delicate, yet priceless. You being so small only makes it… makes you more of a precious little thing.” The giant rumbled as he attempted to explain his choice of words.

Lark’s face flushed even more. It was clear that the titan had a fondness for her and her tiny self. She averted her gaze now, looking down at her feet as she fiddled with her fingers in the giant’s palm.

Sky could see how shy she was getting, and he couldn’t help himself from smiling. He brought her even closer to his face, studying her features. Her bright golden hair was cut short, but it came down around her cheeks and framed her face. She was small, with thin arms and legs. She looked to be shorter than a typical adult, as much as Sky could tell. And her shyness made her all the more adorable to behold, the way her blue eyes fluttered as she looked down at her feet and up at his face.

The titan tilted his head at her, his own bright blue eyes seemed to glow on their own. Lark returned his gaze shyly, tensing up as he stared at her.

“You’re cute.” Sky said to her suddenly, and Lark’s fingers immediately gripped into the giant’s palm.

“Wh… huh?” Lark stammered, feeling her face flush even more red. “I am… I mean… you think so?”

Sky nodded, closing his eyes as he did so. He gazed at her fondly, the adorable little woman in his hand. “Yes. You’re adorable.” The giant chuckled.

Lark was speechless. Never in her life did she think she would be in this situation, held so close to a giant man’s face, complimented by him. As she dared to look back at him, she realized Sky was rather cute, too.

She fiddled with her fingers a little longer, speechless. She wasn’t sure if she should accept his compliment as it was, or assume that this was him coming-on to her.

“So…” Sky said as he looked directly at the little woman in his hand. “First off, you should give me your number, so I can call your phone and help you find it again.” The titan quirked his brow at her. “Secondly, you should give me your number anyways. If you want. I’m thinking we go out for lunch later, what do you say?”

Lark bit her lip as she looked up at the giant. She had completely forgotten about her lost phone in the midst of all… this.

“Y-yeah… I would like that, Sky.” She said, blushing, still not quite comprehending all of this completely. Did she really pull a titan by being a ditz who literally fell down his shirt? The giant smiled, blue eyes shining with delight at her response. He then leaned forward and stretched out his cupped hand, showing his little lady friend the human-sized kitchen on his countertop.

“Great! Feel free to make yourself breakfast, though.” Sky said as he tilted his palm so Lark could step off of it. “How are you feeling, by the way? Sleep well?” The giant asked as he peered at her and the tiny kitchen.

Lark stepped off Sky’s hand and looked around the countertop kitchen. She was amazed that he would even think to have such a thing installed in his house.

“I’m good, actually… I thought maybe I’d have a hangover this morning but… maybe sleeping on a titan fixed that.” Lark replied to Sky half-jokingly as she peered into the fridge.

“You’re right about that. I can heal you just by touching you.” Sky beamed as he leaned over and watched Lark look around the kitchen.

Lark looked back at the giant, then touched the back of her head. He was right, she had almost completely forgotten that she had fainted last night and hit her head on the floor. Sky must have taken care of it quick enough for her to even remember getting hurt after passing out.

“That’s really handy, I gotta say… does it work for everything? Like, hereditary diseases?” Lark asked him curiously as she took out a loaf of bread and some butter.

“Um. I’d have to test that. You don’t happen to have any hereditary diseases, do you Lark?” The giant had to stifle a laugh as he asked her.

“No… I don’t think so.” Lark giggled as she made herself a plain piece of bread with butter to munch on. She was too excited to eat much else.

“That’s good… well, once we find your phone, I should get you back to your hotel so you can freshen up, huh?” The giant said as he leaned in close to Lark, a big smile on his face as she stood beside the fridge and clutched her bread with wide eyes. “If you will let me hold you, that is.” He winked at her.

Lark stared up at the giant’s face, feeling the warmth of his breath as he leaned close to her. She nodded at him, taking another bite of her breakfast. “Mmhm! T-that’s no problem.” The little woman said bravely to her 130 foot tall date.

She knew this was going to be the most memorable first date she’ll ever have.

[thiefbird]

WIP Wednesday

I haven't gone to bed yet so to me it's kinda still tuesday, but! I am finally writing again instead of being braindead, so have an excerpt from the next installment of So Long Lives This!

Shaking himself from his thoughts as he knelt to encourage the fire higher - Stephen still got cold all too easily - Jack heard Stephen's distinctive tread on the stairs, the result of the disreputable lead-soled halfboots he insisted on wearing if not bullied into more Christian footwear, and hastily rose, dusting off the knees of his breeches. "Should not have thought it were so- Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!" "There you are, Stephen!" Jack felt his cheeks stretching in a broad smile at the look of shock on Stephen's usually inscrutible face. "Come now, be a good soul; sit by the fire and have some coffee. Mrs Broad will bring us our supper soon, now you are home." "And what, pray, are you doing skulking about my private apartment, Jack Aubrey?" Stephen demanded as Jack took him by the elbow and steered him into a chair. "Have you no respect for the laws of society? Have never you learned to write in advance of a visit? I might have been in Ireland, for all love, or Spain, and then where should you have been?"

and also one from a bit of meta-analysis re: Stephen's queercoding and how I read it as interacting with Diana's insecurities:

We agree that, whether he is actually a queer man, Esteban Maturin y Domanova is canonically giving off The Vibes, even isolated from Jack Aubrey. Next point is... Despite the overwhelming evidence of his adoration and obsession and love for her, Diana constantly doubts that Stephen truly loves her. My theory is that Stephen's perception as a queer man is contributing - she is afraid that the way he comes off is because he is, in fact, attracted to men, and sp

[coconuttz]

10 Fashion Startups

Here are ten fashion startups that have been making waves in the industry, offering innovative solutions and fresh perspectives:

1. Rent the Runway

Rent the Runway revolutionized fashion by offering designer clothing rentals. Customers can rent high-end garments for special occasions or everyday wear, making luxury fashion more accessible and sustainable by reducing the need for single-use purchases.

2. Everlane

Everlane is known for its "radical transparency" in pricing and ethical production practices. The brand focuses on creating high-quality, minimalist wardrobe essentials while ensuring fair wages and environmentally friendly production processes.

3. Stitch Fix

Stitch Fix combines personal styling with data science to deliver personalized clothing recommendations. Customers receive curated boxes of clothing based on their preferences, which they can try on at home before deciding what to keep.

4. The Yes

The Yes is a personalized shopping platform that uses AI to tailor fashion recommendations to individual users' tastes. As users interact with the app, it learns their preferences and curates a personalized shopping experience, making it easier to discover new brands and styles.

5. Pangaia

Pangaia is a materials science company with a focus on sustainable fashion. The brand creates clothing using innovative, eco-friendly materials like seaweed fiber and recycled plastic, combining fashion with environmental responsibility.

6. ThredUp

ThredUp is one of the largest online thrift stores, offering secondhand clothing at affordable prices. The platform encourages sustainable fashion by giving pre-loved items a second life and making it easy for consumers to buy and sell gently used clothing.

7. Depop

Depop is a social shopping app that blends social media with e-commerce. It allows users to buy and sell unique, secondhand, and vintage fashion items. The platform has a strong community focus and is popular among younger, fashion-forward consumers.

8. Allbirds

Allbirds focuses on creating eco-friendly footwear using sustainable materials like merino wool and eucalyptus trees. The brand has gained a reputation for its comfortable and minimalist sneakers, appealing to consumers who value sustainability and style.

9. Farfetch

Farfetch is an online luxury fashion retail platform that connects consumers with a global network of boutiques and brands. It offers a wide range of designer clothing and accessories, making high-end fashion accessible to customers around the world.

10. Cuyana

Cuyana promotes a "fewer, better things" philosophy, encouraging consumers to invest in high-quality, timeless pieces rather than fast fashion. The brand is committed to sustainability, using ethical manufacturing practices and sustainable materials to create its products.