#instead of that asshole poser she gets involved with

[devilsskettle]

dinner in america is such a “take what you want from it and leave the rest” movie for me because i do think it’s very cute and i can buy into some of the wish fulfillment nature of the story but admittedly there are some parts that really don’t work for me, there are some parts that fall a little flat either in terms of the characters or humor, and the pacing is a bit of a challenge tbh. but it’s unbelievable what the human brain can overcome by virtue of simply Just Liking That Guy

[queenisobelle]

48-Hour Tinder Journey

Modern dating is a very complicated thing as an in denial adult these days. If you are one of those singles among their group of happily married, engaged, or officially/unofficially committed group of friends, maybe you will wonder where you shall be seeing yourself years from now when you have set upon yourself the time or age of which you want to get married, have kids and start a messy but happy family. Pressures come everywhere ranging from social media memes to that aunt who keeps asking you about your plan on getting married. Why do they even do that? Will they pay for the wedding? Will they change those dirty diapers of your future little humans? The point is that those unnecessary single-shaming and social pressures come from everywhere and for someone who’s happy with his life, those things shouldn’t have mattered. Or if indeed they mattered, it wouldn’t have been such a big deal to stay as a lone wolf among the pack of hyenas which are high on endorphins.

Meeting in person comfortably is not for everyone so most people opt to use online dating. On a normal way of starting a face-to-face conversation with a complete stranger, it would’ve been awkward. I mean, how do you start a conversation from scratches? How do you approach a person without looking like a disoriented potato who forgot how to talk to humans? May it be on dating sites or social networks, the most common is through dating apps. One of the most popular apps is Tinder. Such app had existed for quite a while now that I even heard about it since I was in my junior years in college. Back then, I thought it was just a puzzle game app so I had to uninstall it out of disappointment when I found out that it was a dating app.

Fast forward. It’s 2020 and my bisexual male friend told me about how he met a decent guy from the app and how their first date went absolutely well so they eventually enjoyed the night that he ended up ditching our plans to catch up over a bottle of my favorite Mojitos tequila. He told me to try using the app coz you bet my magnetic bookmarks from Big Bad Wolf that I’m single AF. So I gave the app a chance and installed it and set a 48-hour countdown timer because the least thing that I want over my uncommitted hypothalamus is to be dependent on the app for social encounters. I’m an introvert and it could be a wicked thing to be stuck in a virtual dating app.

*I got mistaken as a trans quite a few times. LOL. Not offended, though.

Over the course of 48 hours, after countless “swipe lefts” and “swipe rights”, my profile had a few matches which means you both swiped right on each other’s profile signifying a mutual interest based on the displayed pictures and other details such as but not limited to age, sexual orientation and preference, hobbies, anthem, and a short bio of what you want the other person to notice about your profile. Out of those matches, not everyone is going to chat first so I did the first chat on some guys that I matched with. Out of those few chats, I have categorized the different types of guys that you can meet in Tinder into three categories: friendly, naughty, and boring. I can’t speak for the other guys that I didn’t match with or those guys that I matched with but didn’t chat either. The three classifications of the guys I chatted in Tinder are merely based on how they responded to my decent and friendly chats.

I figured out that most guys in that platform are not so bad at all. Most of whom I had encountered were friendly guys who share at least one same interest with me – books, TV series, travels, etc., etc. Some of them ended up being my friends or on mutual following in the other social media platforms. Those types of guys are usually easy going in chats and they actually keep the conversation alive and flowing. If given the chance to meet one of them in the future, I’m totally up for it and I'm sure it’s going to expand my friendship circle.

*I unmatched already so I cannot retrieve the convo from Tinder. We followed each other in Instagram so I had it, instead.

While most guys are friendly and decent, there are those assholes who want nothing but to hook up with girls. I know it’s the modern world where love is scarce and lust is rampant so having awesome sex is like the driving force for some people to date even without the mental and emotional connection to someone. Yes, this generation has gone so low to that level. So yeah, there are those who chat and specifically ask if I’m into hook ups or casual sex or FUBU but the thing is I am not. I know it would make me sound like a boring conservative but I still believe in love and the pure intentions of the soul. I dearly hope that those type of guys will realize that, too instead of just having the cliché mindset that “Boys will be boys.” The thing I hate about these fuckboys is that their hobbies of just fucking anyone available has been becoming a social disease which affects every life that they recklessly touch. I call it the “fuckboy chain reaction theory” which as I see is like a domino effect from engaging in casual sexual exploits. See for example, a fuckboy fucks a random girl and leaves her since it’s rare for that type of social engagement to be emotionally mutual. Then, the girl feels abandoned and desperately starts looking for something that she thinks is lacking in her life just because a random asshole made her feel that way. Next is that she eventually finds a guy that will satisfy what she thinks is lacking in her. Again, it’s rare for that type of social engagement to be mutual so either of them will feel abandoned and start looking again and so on. It becomes a recurring cycle of wrecking different lives in search for that emotional fulfillment from sexual feats. I do hope they find the one already so that the chain link will break. It’s not that I am against premarital sex. Just do it as long as you feel connected – not just physically. Again, some of these horny predators are in Tinder. Swiper, beware.

Most guys in Tinder are friendly and some are just horny assholes. Unfortunately, a few of them are just plainly boring. Late and thoughtless replies. Lame topics. Complete utter nonsense. I know, it’s completely normal to not know what to chat about but isn’t it just about the art of asking questions? Then again, we can’t force them to be someone that they are not so we are just going to leave them as they are. At least they are not those sexual predators, right?

I deleted my account as well as the app at the end of the 48-hour involvement, and left a message to all of those whom I chatted with because I wanted to be courteous and polite and also because I wanted to let them know. The message went like this:

“Hello! I’m uninstalling the app because my 48-hour personal trial is gonna end. Thank you for the time here. I’m gonna write a Tumblr post about 48-hour Tinder journey. Good luck!”

Tinder is not a bad place to be when you want to virtually meet people nearby. You just have to have the ability to discern people in swiping without initially meeting them. Also, be careful of catfishers and posers. If you get lucky, maybe you’ll find your one true match in this app. Some people actually got married after finding someone in Tinder. How cool is that? I’d rate the app 3 out of 5 stars since it has its pros and cons in terms of connecting with people. I wouldn’t recommend it as the main tool that you have to use for meeting people but it will certainly help you feel less lonely on your days of solitude. Happy swiping!

[tialovestelevision]

Lonely Hearts

Back over to Angel, which has had a much stronger season so far than Buffy has, to see the show continue to try to establish itself. 1. It’s an angel, Angel. But the joke’s funny. 2. Vision time for Doyle Wow, that looks painful. 3. And now Angel,Cordy, and Doyle are going to an 80s bar. Where we see a lonely blonde who is about to get hit on. 4. The blonde’s name is Sharon. The guy hitting on her is Kevin. 5. Sharon and Kevin are still flirting as Angel, Cordy, and Doyle arrive. They’re going to pass out business cards. 6. Sharon and Kevin just left together while Cordy was teaching Doyle about people. 7. Angel is doing badly. 8. Angel just met someone too. She’s stumbling over words but concerned about him. Her name is Kate. 9. “I prefer those cool bars that are hard to get into, but I can’t get into them.” 10. “I’m not very good at this… talking.” 11. “International House of Posers.” I love Kate. 12. “It’s either this or sit at home alone in the dark.” You and Angel could brood together. 13. Angel is a vet, he says. He’s a bad liar, when he’s not a great liar. 14. “If that was my gift, I’d return it.” 15. And Doyle and Cordy are about to get in a fight with an asshole. 16. “Place like this, nobody’s going to come up and show you who they really are.” Cordy and Doyle beg to differ; there’s an asshole talking to them showing exactly who he is. 17. “I’m a self-flagellating hypocrite slut.” That’s… kind of a fascinating line. Kate beats herself up a lot, but does so in a way that shows that she’s someone who’s immensely aware of her own vices and less so of her virtues. I’ve seen that in people. People who that’s true of tend to be decent people, but frustrating to be close to. 18. Kate is hitting on Angel. Angel took a while to notice it, then turned her down because he’s trying to save people. 19. And now they’re in a fight. 20. The bartender knows the guys who started the fight started the fight. 21. Kate thinks Angel is hitting on someone else. Angel is trying to find out what evil is going on. 22. Here’s Sharon and Kevin again, post-sex. 23. “I was young once. Used to go to bars.” “You used to go to taverns.” 24. So Cordy just basically said that “moment of true happiness” means orgasm. I’d love that meme to die. 25. Wow, Kevin is very, very dead, and Sharon is leaving his house with all kinds of calm. 26. “I’m in the news group search engine.” Has anyone who writes television ever SEEN a computer by 2000? 27. Now they know a demon is eviscerating people. Angel is going back to the bar. He meets Kate and is trying to keep her out of the bar. 28. He did a bad job at that. 29. “I can go wherever I want, and you can go to Hell.” “Been there. Done that.” 30. Kate meets Sharon. Sharon is hitting on a guy. Sharon is also very different from the night before. 31. Angel is pretty sure Kevin is dead. He wants to know who Kevin left with last night. 32. “Demons! Is there anything more disgusting?” Poor Doyle. 33. Now Angel has Sharon’s last name. Sharon left with an early 90s TV reference. 34. Saved by the Bell was an NBC show. Angel was a WB show. 35. And a demon just ate its way from Sharon’s body into the Screech’s. Ewww. 36. Angel entered Sharon’s house without invitation. So Sharon is dead, and he knew that. 37. Angel saw the demon finish inhabiting the Screech. The demon is looking for “the right one.” A body it can keep. 38. Looks like they may have already reverted to the vampire makeup from Buffy. Good move. 39. Wow, the demon makes its vessels strong. 40. And Angel is under arrest. Kate is a cop. 41. Angel doesn’t have a private investigator license. They’re not hard to get - a few hours’ training. 42. Angel is very under arrest. Except he just escaped. The demon has also escaped, though. 43. Now Doyle sees Cordy’s bad apartment. 44. Angel needs an invitation to Cordy’s apartment. Now he has one. 45. “‘Cause that’s what lonely people do.” There’s the whole show in a nutshell. 46. Kate is at Angel’s house now. She found his blood. He’s at bars looking for the demon. The demon has jumped to a new host. 47. She thinks he’s a serial killer, and he asks her to trust him. 48. And the bartender kocks Kate out. The demon’s possessing him and wants to jump to Kate. But Angel knocked him out instead. It didn’t last long; now he’s fighting the bartender. 49. Now the bartender has thrown Kate at Angel. Kate knows Angel isn’t the killer now, but the bartender’s forehead is broken and he has to seduce someone. 50. Angel is basically Batman, except in a world where material strength matters. 51. Bartender’s whole face is failing structural integrity. So he’s resorting to attempted kidnapping. 52. And getting tossed around by Angel. 53. And now he’s on fire. And getting shot by Kate. A lot. 54. Well, that’s one less immortal eviscerating burrowing demon in the world. 55. “I think you should know I searched your place. Illegally. No warrant.” “Why are you telling me?” “I don’t know. So we could start fresh.” He’s an unlicensed private investigator and you yourself saw him at a murder scene. A search warrant would not have been hard. 56. “What is this, a lobster?” Then Angel Batmans out of there. 57. Everyone wants to brood! Overall: That was much better than its companion Buffy episode. Like, a lot. It does continue the franchise’s overall sex negativity (seriously, the only liason we’ve known about that hasn’t been punished by the story or marked as evil by the people involved so far in either TV show is Willow sleeping with Oz in Graduation Day), but apart from that, and sex negativity is pretty much a given in 90s TV, this was really great. Kate is a wonderful character and a good local voice to ground the show in Los Angeles, and Doyle and Cordy got some good development. The mystery was interesting and the demon truly horrifying. Most of all, though, it established what Angel is about. The big city, where you can be surrounded by people and completely alone. Adulthood, when you’re suddenly in a space where your most natural social situations are explicitly designed to prevent deep, lasting connections and opportunities for sex with equal vigor. Los Angeles, a sea of people and buildings and ideas so vast you can live there your whole life and not see even a fraction of it. I really enjoyed this.