#instead of looking for a subtext that simply isn't there...

[aida-sparks]

Eddie pining in secret over Buck seems like a legitimate thing.

There's subtext in many scenes that make me think Eddie has secretly pined over Buck to some extent. I also see more than one reason why Eddie might never act on all those warm feels he doesn't know what to do with. Just one of those reasons is that even if he has finally accepted that he himself has feelings for Buck, he simply doesn't see how Buck could ever reciprocate.

Why would Eddie think that? Eddie's understanding of Buck's sexual life is shaped by what he's heard. (And what he hasn't!)

Eddie was never around to hear Maddie's comments that imply her brother might like men the same way he likes women.

Maddie to Buck in 2x4: "So does this boy crush on Eddie mean that you're finally ready to move on from Abby?"

Maddie to Josh in 3x12: "Oh no, I like you too much to set you up with my brother." Unrelated to Maddie but still key: Eddie also missed TK's comment to Buck in the Lonestar crossover episode, where TK assumed Buck was either gay or bi and that Buck was hitting on him.....

2. Instead, Eddie was around to hear all about Buck's firehose exploits back in the days when he was a self-described "sex addict". Yes, Eddie knows about Buck 1.0.

In 3x12, When Chimney suggests Eddie try talking to a therapist name Rosie, Buck asks, "Is that the one I slept with?" Eddie responds, "You slept with your therapist?"

Most recently in 6x13 Eddie listens to Buck try to calculate all the women he's slept with.

No one can convince me that the look on Eddie's face here is simply exasperation. He truly looks a little crestfallen, like Buck's words stung him.

It's just another reminder in Eddie's head that Buck is different from him when it comes to sex. Pair that with the head canon that Eddie is demisexual (everything in canon points to it, in my opinion!), and it's easy to see why Eddie would think he has zero chance with Buck. Buck once described himself as a sex addict. Eddie, on the other hand, got with Shannon in high school and hasn't ever been shown to go looking for any casual flings or want even a one-night stand. I don't think Eddie judges either lifestyle; he just recognizes they are very different. So, no matter what Eddie may have come to realize about his own feelings toward Buck, it's easy for him to think he could never be enough for Buck. And so Eddie pushes down those warm feelings, and he settles for whatever he can get with Buck. As long as Buck's in his and Christopher's life, that can be enough for Eddie. And that's still so sad to me, because it means that Eddie still isn't following his own heart.

It would be interesting for Eddie to be in earshot the next time Maddie makes a comment about a male date for Buck, though!

[zvtara-was-never-canon]

i've seen zks be like "if we were self inserting we would've been doing so with mai since she's such a blank slate character" but the thing is mai *does* have a personality, it's just an unconventional type of personality they can't personally relate to as much as they can with katara or jin

Katara also has a personality - one zutarians constantly disregard for the sake of self-inserting. Hence them constantly going on and on about how "No 14-year-old girl would go for a bald 12-year-old instead of the hot, older guy with a cool scar."

I wouldn't even say Mai's personality is unconventional, it's just personality that sexism says girls should not have. Being all nurturing and soft and vulnerable with someone else doesn't come easy to her, she doesn't react with too much emotion to most things, yet she will speak her mind when something isn't to her liking - and most things are not to her liking because, despite her apathy, she's not exactly someone people would discribe as "easy going". If Mai was a guy, especially a conventionally attractive one, she would be super popular, much like her boyfriend who could be a real bastard sometimes.

You just have to look at all the zutara fics, fanart and meta that constantly make Mai out to be an uncaring, cruel, and downright abusive person for doing things like not pretending to like something just because her boyfriend was the one to get it for her, or getting cranky, or asking Zuko to get her food, or simply getting mad at him when he unfairly accuses her of liking someone else... and then act like Katara is the "better woman" for supposedly being super easy going and "only wanting love"

Zutarians want a doormat girl that they can use to not only ship themselves with Zuko, but also to CONSTANTLY suck up to him. Katara just happened to be the one that was there from the start and, more importantly, didn't actually interact with Zuko that much, so she doesn't ruin their fantasy of "ideal girlfriend for precious boy Zuko" (extra ironic considering that, if Katara really was that passive instead of stubborn and strong-willed, Zuko would fucking hate her).

Because Zuko and Katara are rarely seen truly talking to each other and having to deal with their clashing personalities/goals, zutarians just pretend the negative scenes were "repressed sexual tension" to ignore the simple fact that these two characters genuinely hated each other - Zuko hated her for being a foreigner that dared to put up a fight against his nation's imperialism, and Katara hated him because imperialism killed nearly everyone in her tribe, including her mom - and then hyper focus on the few positive scenes, taking them out of context to make it romantic.

More importantly, they can pretend that they were TOTALLY thinking about each other during all those scenes in which they're dealing with literally any problem, as if Zuko and Katara were each other's "saviors", even though their arcs have nothing to do with each other -and since these are the overwhelming majority of the "scenes with zutara subtext" they are PERFECT for people who like self-inserting because they are completely blank slates.

But Mai? There are entire episodes in which her romance with Zuko is a super important part of the plot - and she speaks her mind regardless of whether Zuko likes what she has to say. She can be bossy, she can be cranky, and she is her own damn self (which Zuko canonically likes). More importantly, the show doesn't take the easy route of "every problem in their relationship is caused by something outside of their control, like the war or an obviously evil romantic rival that is totally coercing one of them into a relationship" - aka the lazy excuses Zutarians use to justify why their ship was never canon, let alone endgame.

Mai's personality is not easy to erase because she has an actual dynamic with Zuko, something Katara didn't have until the very end of the show and thus it naturally didn't get fleshed out enough to threaten the idealized version of it zutarians came up with in their heads. If Mai had been a one-off character like Jin, with only enough time to be charmed by Zuko's cluelessness, they would LOVE her.

[darkcircles4lyfe]

This doesn't have anything to do with anything, but i had a talk with a friend a few days ago, about shonen biasis and the way this shapes our expectations, and mha came up so i remembered how so many people apply those biasis HEAVILY into the manga, to the point that they sound like they're looking for a different story.

And one of those things that it seemed to be MOST talked about is exactly bkdk's relationship.

I have seen many times people from the fandom (sometimes really angrily) point out how in most cases Katsuki seems to basically take up not one, but four roles in Izuku's life and this includes putting him in situations that people associate with the MC's love interest, and it is weird that, despite Izuku "having a girl" for people to make assumptions about, he seems to completely repulse any female character that could be the counter part to Izuku's.

And this made us wonder if Katsuki's placement in those roles and lack of interest was made specifically because the author precisely did not want the actions that both do for each other as romantic but a whole another thing entirely, as a subversion for the these classic tropes, as he did by making the conflict between Ochako and Himiko not a "rivals fighting for the affection of a boy" but something that is connected to the plot of these characters instead.

Oh you bet! I am always down to talk about this, because I think about it a lotttt.

This reminds me, recently I remembered a funny habit I used to have with books I read. Like, back in middle school. I used to start by flipping directly to the last page and reading the final sentence. Usually this did not spoil anything whatsoever, but sure enough, by the time I read through the whole book, that sentence would take on new meaning.

So I started musing about what it would be like if only I could do this with bnha, if everything was already out. It made me feel so nostalgic…

Will the last panel be something grand, or something small? Hopeful or sad? Distant? Intimate? A parting message to the reader? Will it look like almost nothing of consequence to the unknowing eye—yet burst with hard-hitting subtext?

Of course I wonder about all the twists and reveals that might be still ahead of us, but it’s kinda soothing to think about how the whole thing could be put to rest. Because then I realize I’m not worried.

For once, this is not because the story is following so many tropes so predictably that I know exactly, in so many words, how it will end. It’s more like the story is a close friend who I’ve gotten to know well enough that everything they do is so “them” it makes me smirk. I'm often marveling at how Horikoshi has managed to pull all this off. How is it that (at least here in the west) people who aren't really paying attention call it basic and cookie-cutter. Even a Japanese animator called it "classic," and this interview shows such obvious dissonance between Hori and the interviewer, just... wow. But it's so clear that bnha has broken just about every rule in the book at this point, so much so that I struggle to condense it into words. I'm like--*gestures broadly at everything*--why haven't more people picked up on it??

Yet we still get bombarded with people saying "it's a shonen, c'mon, we all know how this will end." Um. No you don't. I KNOW there has to be a bunch of people who are secretly frustrated by Kacchan taking up all the roles and getting all the moments. It's not even in a mysogynistic way, because Kacchan is the most anti-dudebro character imaginable. Bkdk's relationship isn't intended for them and they know it... and you know what, I'm starting to ramble. You've heard all this before. The thing I should really be focusing on in your ask is the part where you mentioned how you and your friend were speculating about bkdk ending up as "a whole other thing entirely" rather than simply romantic.

Well, fuck it, I've been biting my tongue, but now might as well be the time I talk about this. I got into a bit of a disagreement with someone over it once and then I shut up. Because it's very difficult to approach the subject without being lumped in with those people who see bkdk as "brotherly" (ew) or otherwise try to push some "crisis of male friendship" agenda, or at the very least without being accused of enabling people to make excuses against bkdk being canon ad infinitum. So let me be clear that I do NOT want bkdk to have an ambiguous or open ending. I want their complexity and importance to be acknowledged. I want them to use their words. I think we may have created a bit of a false dichotomy there.

I am aromantic, and to suggest romantic relationships are inherently the most important and intimate goes against every fiber of my being. I also reject the idea that cut-and-dry gay representation is more desirable just because it is more easily understood by the masses than aspec representation or representation of relationships "beyond" both romantic and platonic. We recognize how ridiculous it is for people to expect Izu*cha at this point, right? Well, the reason they're so confident anyway isn't just because of heteronormativity. It's also because of amatonormativity, the assumption that romantic attraction trumps all: no matter how much focus bkdk get, Izuku blushed at Ochako, so that automatically makes them more "important." THAT is the notion that I want to challenge most. More than anything, I want bkdk's relationship to be fully acknowledged because they have so much more going for them than just attraction.

You and your friend make an excellent point, that it would be very much in line with Horikoshi's taste and the patterns of his writing so far if he chose to subvert the shonen romance trope not just by giving it to two boys, but also by disregarding its premise entirely. It's unlikely he'd try to stuff them into such a copy-paste ending right at the end.

So maybe they won't get the blushy confession, the obligatory kiss, the wedding, the 2.5 kids and a white picket fence. That's fine, we shouldn't pretend those tired tropes are suddenly revolutionary just because they're gay. But don't be disappointed! Without them, we have more room for things that are actually personally meaningful to bkdk to stand out and receive the nuance they deserve: talking through their feelings openly, building each other up like no one else can, understanding each other like no one else can, smiling at each other, embracing, holding hands, rushing to the other in the hospital, being glued at the hip (or even closer), healing mutual trauma, putting each other first in all things. Maybe we'll also get confirmation on Ochako's side as she moves on from her crush on Izuku. You know what other shonen manga took this exact angle as a way of subverting tropes and presenting genuine complexity? Blue Flag! There are so many ways to do bkdk justice.

Even a kiss isn't out of the question, if the right opportunity comes along. A perfect example of what I'm talking about is Good Omens (major season 2 spoilers) because the kiss between Crowley and Aziraphale was not at all about canonizing them. It was an expression of pain and desperation that just made sense at that particular moment. Neil Gaiman was adamant that if it took that kiss to understand the context of their relationship, you really weren't paying attention. I respect the hell out of that.

Recently I was even daydreaming about bkdk getting something similar to the sort of uh, shall we say tasteful nudity, that togachako got, because of how Izuku appears in the vestige realm.

Ya know like not in an nsfw way but in like a "this is so deeply intimate and soft that I feel like I'm intruding" kind of way... yeah. Because it represents vulnerability and openness and acceptance of someone as they are. And I don't care if people call that bait. It's not. It's beautiful. It’s honest.

[booksandpaperss]

How Stranger Things (poorly) handles racism as a topic compared other heavy topics it successfully tackles

before we get started, I would to direct you all to some other accounts who have already discussed this that you should check out either before or after reading this post: @wewebaggit @googoogagaeyes @elekinetic and anyone else please feel free to tag yourself or another account that’s discussed this and I’ll happily boost it

Content Warning for in show examples of racism and discussions of racism, as well as mentions of homophobia and the AIDES epidemic

.

. While we're discussing historical accuracy in stranger things and homophobia + ignorance being present even in well meaning characters, I want to point out that if the writers of the show weren't so squeamish about addressing racism in any in depth way, than this type of historical accuracy would be for racism too.

what I mean by this: in this sense, the show is not consistent. It's clear that the writers have done their research on 80s homophobia and how openly prevalent it was, if the AIDES allegory in season 2 and the way homophobia was very clearly present in seasons 1 and 2 (it still is in seasons 3 and 4 but the first 2 seasons showed it in the scope of the entire town), but racism was just as overtly prevalent, and yet the writers have neglected to address it in the same thoughtful and coded way. if the show was just as consistent about racism as it is about homophobia, than the white characters would be at the very least shown as ignorant just like the straight characters are.

and I'm not going to say that it's completely ignored, because that's not true:

-in season 2; mike makes an ignorant comment that implies Lucas should have been Winston because he's black, and Lucas calls him on it. There's also the very racist undertones (that are practically overtones) of Billy's treatment of Lucas. -There is almost nothing in season 3 except for a jokey joke when Nancy says the whole party is her family and the receptionist, who is a black woman, gives Lucas a skeptical look.

-Season 4 is a little better, with the implications (key word: implications, I'll come back to that in a moment) of Lucas's season 4 arc being that he was trying to fit in because he didn't want to be racially targeted and bullied for being a nerd at the same time anymore, that he felt like even more of an outsider compared to the rest of his otherwise all white friend group who, as far as he knows, are all cishet and giving him shit for wanting to lessen how much he's perceived as an outsider because he's automatically seen as even more of a "freak", and his friends just weren't getting it because they were white and ignorant. So the writers aren't blind to race and racism.

However. None of the examples that I've just listed are addressed later in any in depth way; not like the homophobia is. The only one that's even remotely delved into instead of simply being glossed over is Lucas's s4 arc, and even that is still very flitted around and left up to interpretation of the audience.

The writers seem to have a very "hit and run" sort of policy with addressing racism. They clearly know they should, and they at least seem to know that having a black character in an 80s setting with a cast of mostly white characters inherently creates a lot of racial subtext-

-for example, the very loud subtext of Jason (a white boy much older than Lucas) seeing Max (a white girl) in a trance alone with Lucas (a black boy) and immediately assuming the worst + Jason's white friends tackling an 11 year old black girl to the ground: subtext that I'm still not sure if the writers and directors were even aware of bc they never addressed it and their track record isn't great-

-but they hardly do anything about it.

I'm not surprised, considering this show is headed by two white men, but what really gets me is that they all truly could have tried harder. Like I said earlier, it's clear they've done research and put thought into addressing homophobia (it still could've been handled better but that's an entirely different conversation), and it's evident from Max's s4 arc that they also did research on Depression, PTSD, and the impacts on someone of their abusive family member dying. So the lack of care and thought put into addressing racism in the same way is clearly more than ignorance (which would still be bad, when you're writing a show this big in 2023 with topics like this you're actually, shocker, responsible for making sure they're addressed properly, ignorance is a choice at that point), its just fucking lazy. they don't care. And this not caring is inherently harmful on a show this big and frankly, I'm tired of so many viewers and people in this fandom straight up ignoring this fact, just like the show runners.

And I haven't even covered the complete lack of effort put into Patrick's backstory, or the fact that Erica is very much the sassy, mature for her age black girl stereotype (she deserves so much better). Oh, And we can’t forget the copaganda.

I'm glad that season 4 started to explore the dynamic between Lucas and Erica and expand on both their characters, and from the looks of things that will continue in season 5, so the writers have a chance to do their research, actually put effort more effort into the sinclair sibling’s characters, and improve, and I'm hoping they will but as of right now I don't trust them to, and won't unless they prove me wrong.

TDLR; the main issue is that Stranger Things is clearly a show that addresses topics like depression, abuse, homophobia, and racism, but the racism part is neglected compared to the others, just like how Lucas and Erica's characters are handled poorly compared to the white characters,. it's lazy, horribly insensitive, and racist in and of itself. There's a clear bias, and even if it improves in season 5 we still should be talking about it, and more white people (yes white queer people included, we are not exempt from this discussion, if anything we should care just as much about it as when we’re talking about homophobia) in this fandom need to start listening when black and brown people do talk about it instead of just waltzing through and ignoring it for your own peace of mind.

also I should clarify that I myself am white, I made sure I did research before making this post in order to talk about this accurately and consciously, but if I made any mistakes or said something insensitive or used an incorrect term or anything else, feel free to correct me and I will readily fix it

as a final note: please check my rebligs of this for links to more posts that talk abt this issue

[writingquestionsanswered]

How can I avoid plot armor? I love the way my wip is going but it's starting to look like everyhting could be solved easily if a character just told the truth of what's going on. I can't really take that truth away from this character because then it messes up their whole goal and motives. I can't change anything else because it's crucial to the plot, but I don't want to weaken my writing with this plot armor. Help please

Conflict Could Be Solved if Character Told the Truth

This actually isn't "plot armor," so let's start there. :)

"Plot armor" is a term that refers to when a main character is able to survive serious injury or death in a way that is implausible and convenient, particularly when it happens multiple times. In other words, it is as though the character is wearing "armor" that protects them from the dangers of the plot. An example of plot armor would be: a character who is unscathed after a deadly battle with armed enemies, escapes a space station moments before it explodes, survives a horrific fall with only minor injuries, tries to disarm an alien weapon with know knowledge of how it works and succeeds, is able to safely land a crashing alien spaceship despite having no piloting knowledge or experience.

It sounds like what's happening instead is that you haven't come up with plausible reasons for why this character is hiding the truth. How you fix this will depend on who knows what in your story. If the character is simply hiding the truth from other characters, but the reader is able to know about it, it's much easier to deal with because all you need is the plausible reason/s why they're not telling the truth. However, if the truth is also being hidden from the reader, you need to set up those plausible reasons in subtle ways... in ways that don't make it too obvious that there are secrets being kept, but in ways the reader will remember when the truth is revealed--so they can look back and understand why those secrets were kept. In other words, you'll probably want to read up on using subtext in your story. Google "spotlight on subtext Jami gold" because there's a really good guest blog there by one of the ladies who does the Emotion Thesaurus books, which gives you different pointers on how you can build that subtext into your story. In other words, the ways you can subtly hint that secrets are being kept and why.

I hope that helps!

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I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

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[let-love-run-red]

Okay so ... new fan here! I saw your Angsty Miguel headcanons. And I want more. If I may request, my lovely amazing author, may I have headcanons about Miguel with an emotionally sensitive reader? Along the lines of: she's quick to think that he doesn't love her because he works a lot, or she thinks he's cheating bc he spends a lot of time with a female friend, or she feels ashamed to talk to him about her emotions ... maybe with fluffiness at the end for my tortured soul? Idk have fun with it.

(p.s. your amazing)

Thank you for asking so politely anon! and I'm glad you're enjoying my writing on this hellsite lol, this was an interesting one to write but I had fun with it!

Masterlist | Requests! Warnings: assumed cheating

- He didn't love you. How could he, someone who loved you wouldn't stay away so often

- When he was with you, he was perfect. The caring, loving boyfriend you could only dream about

- but you knew he was thinking about her instead. Jessica. You'd met her, she was kind and funny, and he claimed she was married, but you knew what was really happening

- The late nights they spent together where he didn't call you. The mornings he left extra early so he had time to bring her breakfast

- He always said it was work. It was for work, she was just a colleague, they were out late on a mission, but you knew he was cheating on you with her

- The days he would come home smelling like another womans perfume were the worst of them all. He would hug you after a long day being gone, and smell like sugar and citrus. Not your perfume.

- Then she got pregnant. Your head begged you to believe him, she was married, it was her husbands, but he never let you speak with her after your initial meeting and your heart told you to look at the subtext of it all

- the late nights, the perfume, the way his hair would be disheveled and he would be covered in bruises and light scratches, you knew and it made you sick.

- "You don't love me, do you." You finally confronted him one morning. Another early morning where he rushed out the door early yet again to bring Jessica yet another breakfast.

- He paused and you wondered, just for a moment, if he would turn around and face you.

- He didn't. But you could have guessed that.

- You didn't expect him to come home nearly an hour early. You didn't expect him to be holding a bouquet of flowers, not nearly enough of an apology, and you didn't expect him to sit beside you on the couch with his large hands folded in front of him.

- "Are we going to talk?" He asked simply. Now he wanted to talk. You sneered. "Now you want to?" You snapped. He sighed, leaning back into the couch and running a hand down his face. "I think we need to." He said. You scoffed. "Why do you think I don't love you?" Miguel pressed further. You felt your throat burning and tears pricking at your eyes. "Have you done anything to show me you do?" You snapped in return. He winced and you turned to glare angrily at the TV. "I'm sorry." He said simply. And you shook your head. "You're cheating on me aren't you." Your voice was quiet now, shaky, and he sat bolt upright with furrowed brows. "Of course not, I, why would you think that?" His face was full of confusion and for a moment you thought... 

- He was a good liar.

- "It's yours isn't it." You asked, not meeting his gaze and tears running down your cheeks. "Dios no," He shook his head, reaching for your hand but hesitating. "Jessicas? No, of course not." He repeated. You didn't want to look but your traitorous mind was begging you to listen to him. "You're with her so much." You said instead of turning to face him. "We work together." He said flatly. You knew you were testing his patience.

- Good.

- "Please, you leave early, come home late, bring her breakfast, you come home smelling like her Miguel." Your voice broke. "I know you think there is, but I promise, there's nothing between Jessica and I but work." He explained softly, his jaw worked side to side and you could tell he was getting close to snapping. "How am I just supposed to trust you?" You finally turned to face him and his expression grew soft as he reached out to brush the tears from your cheeks so gently. "Oh mi hermosa dama," he let you rest your face in his hand, "eres todo mi vida." He crooned. He'd said that enough you knew what it meant.

- You are my whole life.

- "You're never here." You whispered, not trusting your voice if you spoke any louder. "I know, I know and I'm sorry." He soothed, stroking his thumb over  your cheek before moving closer and pulling you gently into his arms. "I just want you here." You breathed against his chest, turning to press your face into him, feeing your tears soak into his shirt and the suit you knew was underneath. "Sh sh mi sol, lo sé, lo siento." He pressed his lips against the top of your head and smoothed his hand over your hair.

- He leaned back and you leaned with him, laying on his chest as he laid back on the couch.

- "I love you, more than anything in this world or another." He kissed the top of your head again, pulling you up so your nose was tucked against his neck as you cried, holding you steady on his chest. "Please, never let me make you feel like this again."

[chocolatepot]

The funny thing about this discourse about what is or isn't real queerness that keeps popping up in this specific corner of fandom just kind of hit me - on BlueSky, I follow a bunch of authors who write fiction about queer characters and it's like ... this topic simply does not come up. They would laugh at you or look confused if it did.

Like. Do you - by "you" I mean the people who keep saying things like "characters kissing at emotional high points instead of talking mean they're hetero-coded" or "the only good queer relationships are the ones that remain purely subtext" - realize that there is a whole world of people writing fiction, often romantic fiction, about queer characters? With the same tropes as everyone else? Everything from traditional romance to fucked-up weirdos? There are probably more than you could read in a lifetime at this point.

[hogwarts-legacy-confessions]

Anybody who thinks it's easy to be seen in any fandom should receive a reality check. I'm going to give those people a bit of tough love. Yes, it is discouraging to try so hard without getting much interaction in return. Yes, it is mostly based on luck and timing whether you get your foot in. No, a gigantic yield of likes and comments isn't going to pour at you with one or even a handful of works just because you think you deserve it. And no, you're not going to be making friends overnight if ever. Most fandom experiences are actually quite lonely. People who do make fandom friends often sacrifice a ton of their free time and in-real-life relationships to hang out with them. It's hard work, it's rotten work and it can eat at you mentally since getting friends and also sticking with them, no matter what your or they do, is hard. Making people read or look at your things is even harder because you feel like you are imposing on them (most of the time you are by the way). This is why you are not creating for others. You are creating for yourself! Out of self-indulgence! Because you are obsessed over these little fictional characters playing out scenarios in your head! I am so sick of hearing people complain about lack of kudos, likes, reposts and comments, and I can't believe a fandom this small suffers from it as well. Why do you care so much for a made up internet currency that will just make you miserable? Create something out of love for the creation. Why give a flying fvck about what others think about your work because chances are, they aren't real critics with real knowledge and feedback that you need. I've noticed that the "icons" of fandoms often don't even interact much in other's creations' comment sections. So why don't you concentrate on perfecting your craft instead, like they do? You can mope about it all day or you could go outside, work on your poetry, do a study of an impressionist painting or read a classic. Consume art, watch movies, go to the theater, experience. Make a roadmap for your goals, take notes, watch tutorials. That's what's gonna give you skills, inspiration and ultimately, visibility for your work, both fan- and/or original. Just do something useful, you! Right. Now.

👀

Sorry, I'm gonna have to tackle this little pep talk head on.

It's horseshit to say "write for yourself" and act like it's shameful for people to express their frustration with the perception of having their work ignored. Yes, one should ultimately create fanworks that are true to themselves as much as possible, and do so because they enjoy it first and foremost, but I have a feeling that anon here doesn't know what it's like to pour your heart and soul into something and get crickets. When you know people are seeing it, that feels like a judgment of your work - a negative one. I say that as a quasi-popular creator in the fandom.

I'm not saying people are obligated to like or engage with works they don't find appealing, I'm simply arguing why it's valid to feel sad about that situation.

If fandom creations are all "for ourselves" then why bother posting on Tumblr or ao3 in the first place? It's because there's a community here that we want to engage with. Every single one of us.

This posturing about "I write for myself so I don't need or want any validation for my work" might put you in a special category of emotionally different people but it's not true for the majority.

In fact, most of the idea of asking for prompts on Tumblr is to entertain an audience of people supportive of your work, so I hope you've never answered a creative ask, anon. That would make you a hypocrite.

Everyone should absolutely be writing what pleases them first and foremost, but that doesn't detract from the sense of community and pride you get when someone else openly enjoys your work.

I also feel like there's a definite subtext in this confession that reads "you're not popular because you're not good enough. You need to work harder and you'll succeed." Studies have shown that popularity is not necessarily based on merit, and it's almost random what gets popular based on who latches onto something and shares it.

In short, anon, please get off your high horse. There are plenty of amazing writers and artists in this fandom who get little to no traction. Maybe if you stopped getting comments, kudos, and likes on your work for a day we'd see how you feel about this issue then.

This is certainly not a dynamic unique to HL, although in a fandom with only a few hundred active members at most (at least on Tumblr), it feels more personal when your work is ignored. Since our tags are small, it's harder to just accept that you're being overlooked and not take it personally.

You can find countless posts decrying the overall decrease in engagement in the past few years on Tumblr and begging people to leave kudos and comments! Maybe people should try to keep in perspective that they're not alone, maybe we all should complain less, but the idea that we should be better than wanting others to enjoy our work (and show that) does not sit well with me, especially while we're constantly watching others in the fandom sniff each other's farts.

[postsforposting]

Speedrunning

Marvel Jesus meets Dogpool. Meets MARY puppins.

If you follow the story, you notice that there's a bunch of religious stuff in it. It's why it's 72 hours, aka three days. He spend three days in hell, same as Jesus after getting crucified.

Wade and Logan start off getting sent to the cross. Except it was supposed to be God aka Logan on that cross, and Wade grabbed him to go with him. If you look frame by frame, Wade first is wrapped around Logan's chest, but he ends up pinned to the cross right behind Logan. I think he deliberately put himself between Logan and the magnet, to protect him.

This is not how it goes in the bible. Jesus is forsaken on the cross by god--he's not there INSTEAD of god, god sent him there. God so loved the world he sent his only son to die? Nah, this time around anti-Jesus so loved god (himself, really) that he tried to PREVENT it.

The superficial biblical allusions aren't what we think they are when you really look. You know, like how the bible can say something nasty but we choose call that love by going "well what it REALLY means is", ripping apart all possible subtext. DPW makes you think it's biblical on the surface, makes you think this is our Jesus, when....it's not.

He's an ANTI hero. First movie flat out said he's not a hero. He's anti-jesus, not jesus. The movie looks like he's Jesus...but it's not. He's not a hero, but he WAS....it's not that simple.

The TVA coming to get him was the Romans arresting Jesus: the Romans needed him to be identified among the crowd, but here they already know who he is and are merely being polite about confirming it's him. Jesus didn't want to go: that's the whole garden of Gesthsemane and the "why have you forsaken me" prayer.

Wade, however, DOES want to go with the TVA. He's talking about getting sexual and they're talking about getting violent, aka...."let's fucking go".

The missing character in the Roman scene is Peter: he denies Jesus three times. Our Peter, instead, affirms him three times over the movie: once in the salesman lockers, once when he shows up to save him from the Deadpool corps, and again to save him from the TVA.

That makes the birthday party not the nativity, but the Last Supper. It's his bday party (is a nativity), and there's only one candle on the cake, because he's about to be taken to hell and reborn. It's Year One, the year Jesus is born. The speech Wade gives to everyone? That's the Last Sermon. Both birth and death. (Born again regeneration joke.)

The TVA is anti-hell: people thinking they're helping the world when really they're not. Except it's not that simple, because it IS true that if people are going to suffer and die, it's better to make it quick. The problem is that these anti-demons don't try to fix anything: they just let things happen. Not that the previous TVA "trying to fix things" was any better. It's not that simple.

You know who thinks the world is doomed and it should be...cleansed? Like the TVA thinks? That's god in biblical Revelations: judgement day. But again, Jesus was SENT, he didn't freely choose, he simply didn't fight: that's the monologue in the garden of Gesthemane.

Our Wade though? He makes it look like he's going upstairs, but we have a whole dance routine proving he's more than capable of avoiding Paradox's shaft. He lets himself be sent to "the void". After refusing a place in....anti hell. Because it's still hell. Anti hell isn't heaven. He WANTS to go to the void.....aka, the heaven for antis, anti heaven. Perfect for people like anti heroes. Wade's defining trait is being contrary: doing the opposite of the thing he's expected to do. That's why he's morally flexible: he creates the choice what Francis meant to deny him, that we as god the author meant to deny him.

Wade goes to a version of hell, finds god through that hell when it was neither expected nor required, and returns triumphant, only to be cast down.

The TVA does not expect him to save the multiverse, to "matter", because they want to send him to earth. Being contrary, he goes to ostensible hell instead. This hell is a trash heap, nothing in it is supposed to....matter. IRL religion Jesus saved hell, forgave the sins of those who repented. Our Wade therefore makes hell worse and redeems people who don't deserve it.

Wade is saying to Logan as Logan watches him get shafted: will you follow me into hell? you comin or what?

The story you think is there, is, but also isn't. (and also with you god's invisible omnipresence joke)

Logan goes with Wade--he doesn't have to. Biblically, god sends Jesus to hell and earth alone. Without him. This god chooses to go with him--he saw what just happened to Wade, he could have taken Paradox out, and did not put up any kind of fight. You're supposed to think this is just normal "moving the plot along" hand wave discrepancies, but it's not--it's literally intentional.

Because god and jesus are the same entity: they're both contrary. Wade deliberately does the "unexpected", the WRONG, thing; Logan deliberately chooses the WRONG thing: he couldn't let them know he wanted to be there. Was that because he couldn't get over himself, or because he literally did not want to be there and so wouldn't lie about it?

Things aren't what they look like, after all.

We meet Johnny Storm, who literally isn't who they think he is. He's the anti-Moses, an anti-prophet, who instead of leading them to freedom, leads them further into anti-hell. Nothing he says is right: "this'll be easy", he says, and it's easy only for the other side.

Johnny is quite literally a "look below the surface"--take off the cloak-- lampshade.

If everything he says is wrong, then everything he said about Nova is also wrong. She's not the devil king of hell; the void is anti-heaven, she's a mirror of Logan. A mirror of an anti-god is.....god herself. The Omega, of alpha-and-omega.

She says she has to "get her hands dirty" to know people's thoughts, instead of merely knowing them from afar like Charles, like god. She "gets her hands dirty" by touching Johnny before any of what he said comes out: she already knew he'd said it. And did nothing about it. Actually seemed to be delighted he said it.

She didn't kill him because he said she was awful; she killed him when he denied saying it, but only after he claimed Wade was a liar. That's bearing false witness, which thou shalt not do, one of the ten commandments of.....god. Johnny's thought crime and offense against her didn't matter. She cared when he said Wade was lying, though. Wade repeated what Johnny said because no one expected him to do that--no one wanted him to, so he did.

Thou also shalt have no other gods before me, which is why she kills Magneto and melts the helmet. Juggernaut is safe because he works for her, aka believes in her. She buries Logan and zips him away because, His Majesty as scary as Nova, is trying to take her throne: another god before her.

Nova is god in anti-hell, aka a version of heaven. She wants to end all other realities until only the void, aka a type of heaven, exists. That's conversion at swordpoint. Judgement day. She has the sparkle circle and could have done this at any time: just as people say the judgement comes in the night like a thief. She never did it because she couldn't do it all at once: she doesn't want a fight. She wants submission.

Logan and Wade leave anti heaven because she expects them to die: did in fact earmark them as the rent to die. They then land right outside a cafe, a place full of food, aka....the garden of Eden. They go back into the garden, unlike the biblical Adam and Eve who were forced out. It's only full of spam and deadly toxins though, nothing actually nutritious. Logan eats the "forbidden apple", rubbing alcohol...also known as nail polish, which removes a superficial glamorous coating to reveal the real "ugly" nail underneath.

Wade hasn't got his mask on here for the same reason: except for him, since we know his real calling is Deadpool, his mask is the real him and his bare face isn't. What he's saying here isn't what he really thinks, that's why he's doing what's expected instead of his normal asshole routine. Same as Nicepool's "niceness" is false. He's "nice" when he's "mask off", but it's false: a white lie to cover his real thoughts. Just as the mask itself is a lie to cover how much he cares: it hides his bleeding--bleeding heart, how much he cares.

We know this isn't what he thinks because Wade's toupee is a lie everyone knows about--we were shown that in the bday party with Nega and Yukio. The the sparse remnant of the toupee is the clothing in the garden of Eden, put on out of shame to hide reality. Logan aka anti god is telling Wade everyone, including Logan and Wade, know who he really is, and that hiding it--trying to be someone he's not--is what's shameful.

He's saying there is nothing wrong with him--

I mean.

There is. That's why they like each other.

But that particular thing is not what's wrong with him. Logan likes his face.

Worst Logan or best Logan? Well, both: he's a blaspheming capital-G God and that's what makes him the best one.

They meet Mary Puppins, which is supposed to look like the John the Baptist where Jesus gets baptized by the holy spirit. John the Baptist heralded the arrival of Jesus and concealed who he was from King Herod who went on to commit the Massacre of the Innocents. Nicepool never expected Wade, is a version of Jesus himself, and I think he's the one who volunteered the Deadcorps to go after Wade--causing the massacre. Puppins is the anti-holy spirit, running to Wade without being called or given leave.

Puppins baptizes Wade through a tongue bath, aka a facial....like baptism is either a facial or getting in the drink. Her tongue is the unicorn horn dick joke, so when I say he's getting a facial I really do mean a facial.

Her being Mary is the complimentary half of the dick joke. She's two sexes, because Virgin Mary conceived by herself. Because this is not just the baptism, but the immaculate conception.

Mary Puppins is Mary mother of god who was asked by the angel Gabriel Nicepool to have Jesus. Perverted though: Mary finds Jesus herself, instead of being asked, and god was not involved in this transaction. Immaculate conception joke.

If you're....aware...of the invisible pink unicorn, then on another level (haha levels of hell via levels of sin joke) Mary is a unicorn because that's god's invisible presence in Mary. God the unicorn is a fantasy creature. Now made flesh, like Logan.

What is, is. But is it? (star trek Spock joke). What IS is? We're exploring subtextual relations!

Isn't it fun what we can do with the words in the bible??? Mmm textuality.

We then move on to "the promised land", which isn't Jerusalem and is full of anti-heroes: people we assume are the good guys but actually are selfish and don't care about other people's worlds. We get to the promised land after going through a desert, aka, the walk out of Egypt. It's not 40 years because these guys have transportation. They stop in the middle of the desert in what appears to be an oasis for a quick temptation to....part the red sea, both literally in murdering each other but also in that it's a sex euphemism. Violence is sex, yanno. Moses holds out his staff and the red sea parts to dry land; Logan pops up his twelve inch staffs and not only makes it rain blood but gets his people wet.

Gotta keep your arms in the car so you don't get them whacked off while you're joy riding.

In the promised land, Wade doesn't found the twelve tribes because he must first go kill the neighbors. Can't have Israel without removing those who were there first; this outlaw land is already empty, but we must get everyone to invade the pharaoh's kingdom. Gambit is anti-Satan, aka the ineffable god, who helps lead everyone to their deaths. Unlike in the bible, they specifically do not kill everyone, not even the titular pharaoh.

The fight in Nova's compound is a massacre of the innocents (where King Herod had all the potential baby jesus killed), because this is heaven for antis: anti heaven. She was protecting them from death. Not enslaving them, unless you count god's commandments, which I will leave as an exercise for the peanut gallery. The battle at the compound is one of the ten plagues: the plague of the firstborn, except the only exemption is that the pharaoh is unexpectedly spared, and she lets them go.

They fall from not-heaven to earth. To save us, ostensibly. But **singsong** nothing is ever what it seems.

Then god shows up to defeat Satan, except instead of stopping Paradox she enhances his crimes.

Killing the failed potential jesuses (deadcorps) is a reference to the actual massacre of the innocents, but really it's the war in heaven. God starts it and it's everyone against two guys; the end is that everyone abandons god for the Peter who believes in them, because they didn't really want to be following orders anyway.

Nicepool's murder is about John the Baptist's beheading: he gets killed for criticizing the marriage of a king to a woman who's less than upright; the woman had known of the plot to kill the previous king but said nothing. The wife, Dogpool, wants to leave Nicepool, to bless her new king Wade and his queen Logan. Nicepool knew Deadpool threatened him--the plot to kill the king--and ignored it. Deadpool kills him because Dogpool needs to be properly widowed before she can marry Wade and Logan.

The bus during the corps orgy invokes the immaculate conception: that's what the "failed dismount" is, aka not pulling out. He got off but didn't pull out. Hence we meet Babypool and thus rises all the Jesus/Deadpools. The orgy itself is portrayed as a heroic act to save the world, but it's really not because the visuals we get reference The Raft, a painting about a boat captain saving himself instead of his men. Wade's not a hero, remember?

In dp2, the movie opens with dead Logan, and then we watch Wade try to kill himself. Ostensibly, the movie is about Wade trying to reach Vanessa, but he's really trying to join Logan in death: he flat out says "you died so I'm gonna do it too". His goal is never to help Russell, it's to die: that's why he puts on the collar at the end. He's trying to reach "the other side" figuratively and literally the whole movie. He goes with the Roman TVA in dp3 because he knows he can reach the other side through them--reach Logan. Traditionally, one does that through death, unconsciousness, or going underwater. Wade goes through a little death, and Logan goes "through the drink"--that's why he's already deep in his cups when Wade finds him, because he too is trying to reach the other side. They're both god, after all--they've both always known that there was more out there.

They'd both give up forever to touch: give up their eternal life just for an excuse to touch. Like going to the reactor, racing to get in, and not caring if they live or die.

He's not doing this to save the world but to kill himself; the implication is that the creation of Jesus wasn't to save the world but to doom it, because he's the guy who heralds Judgement Day. No Jesus, no judgement (anti Jesus is anti Judgemental); the shameful thing in the garden of Eden was hiding oneself rather than facing down God, and the implication there is that the real sin wasn't the apple but doubting yourself and the shame of that.

In the reactor, the apocalypse is turned into the creation of the universe: Wade and Logan are under the feet of god, between the legs of the reactor. They literally light that fuck box on fire in their pursuit of a little death for themselves. They wanted judgement day for themselves, that's why Wade aka Jesus has....returned to earth from the heavens--falling on the car--after his crucifixion on the magnet.

The ending shot of the party is the nativity, but we've seen that before: it's both nativity and the last supper. Previously it heralded the crucifixion and the end of the world; Wade can't die, so what this is really telling us is that while he IS about to get nailed, it's us the audience who's on the chopping block next: he did just kill god, after all. He's gonna do it again.

In life, in his own world, Wade was cut off from Logan--from god. You only get to see god through death, which is why he loves dying so much, and a reason why he hides that with his red suit. Wade doesn't get to stay dead though--doesn't get to stay with god. He's anti-Jesus, who gave himself eternal life instead of finding it in death with god. Vanessa is anti-Wade, anti-(anti Jesus), aka actual Jesus--this is why their crazy used to match but no longer does, because he no longer needs her for life and she can't have him in death. It's not forever with her. Jesus in life is as close as Wade can get to god/death on earth though, so he stays. After he makes it so that her death never happened, she's no longer Jesus because she no longer died for him. He's always known he was destined for someone else--he was always married to the church of Logan.

After finding god via hell, he now has eternal life AND god. Just as Logan does. They've now got a reason to live, but as with any romcom, dying together is the ultimate romantic trope. Whether they live or die, they get what they always wanted. As with lots other things in these movies: it's not either/or, but both/and/plus a secret multiverse. Of course we would expect Deadpool to pervert even death itself, just as he did for himself in dp1 and for Vanessa in dp2.

One of the reasons he rejects the cross Wolvie is because Wade does NOT want a self sacrificing guy. Every Wolvie does that, except the worst one who never says he wants to be there. Until there's something that can actually kill him.

Instead of going up to heaven, he goes up to a version of hell. Instead of going down from heaven to earth, he goes down from the void--a version of heaven--to earth. It's implying that heaven is actually hell, and hell is heaven. Better to rule in hell than serve in heaven: actually, better to get rid of it all, because getting rid of hell--the "TVA doesn't do that anymore"--isn't enough. Wade's defining trait isn't just resistance, it's abolitionism, anti-slavery, like what Francis was going to do to him. God demands obedience, the one thing Wade won't tolerate. The one thing that dooms the world if nobody pushes back against....judgement day, where god wipes out the world. Whether it's the devil doing it or god, both are still the apocalypse.

You know why the biblical stuff is a little bit queer? Not what was expected? Wade skimmed the bible but missed big chunks of it because missing the (Disney's Star Wars) Empire is what Wade did both previous movies. Read the book, didn't like it, bucked tradition to do things differently. It's expected of an anti-jesus and anti-god. There's a motif of "it's not that simple" and "it can be both" through everything, because Wade is nothing if not a queer choice pervert. That's why every movie is one long dick joke: if you're going to be a pervert, you might as well pervert everything and make yourself not just heaven on earth but Christ The Lord himself of perversion.

Wade's universe was not quite dead and then revived....born again. Regenerated. Just like Wade himself. So the universe was.....made in his image. His friends--fans, us--have been upgraded to disciples. Founded on the bones of god, we are the church of the Queer.

You can save the universe if you chuck the rules and put your pervert little hands all over it. Is it still "heroic" if it was incidental and you do it only for your own agenda? Disney thinks so, since they produced this "mistake".

[sarcasticdolphin]

Todolf Cultverse "Pilgrimage"

A follow up to my last cultverse drabble for @oranginacultist

This one isn't as overtly dark as the last one but in context the subtext is very much there. As usual, cultverse is its own warning.

As much as Henry might think otherwise, it was a pilgrimage he went on, if a rather odd one. All such trips were, no matter his intended goal. The forest was thick with greenery and not so foreboding as one might think in spite of his destination. If anything it just seemed more and endless wall of green, the trees barely visible through the leafy vines.

Henry’s thoughts went to Liam. His brother had gone to serve at the temple five years ago, mostly for the pay. As much as their parents hadn’t fully approved, Liam’s eye had been set on the baker’s eldest daughter, and a penniless younger son wouldn’t have much of a chance of convincing her father that he could provide. And so he’d gone to the temple. For the money, but also for the prestige of having served a god.

Henry remembers the jests of the night Liam had left well. The god of death was an odd choice to serve, and in all honesty he’d thought it was because there was no prophet in residence then though a prince had been marked as one. They’d all thought the rumors mostly rubbish until the princely prophet had arrived with his retinue, but Liam almost seemed happy to have an actual prophet to serve if his letters had been anything to go by. 

And it makes sense - as much as it seemed to Henry that Liam enjoyed gardening, it had to get boring especially at what was frankly a small temple in the middle of nowhere. 

Henry snorts. The middle of nowhere seems a proper name for his current destination.

Liam’s last letter had been so excited, though. He’d seemed so eager to be discharged from service, and so looking forward to finding a job tending the gardens of one of the lords then marrying his beloved. 

But a day passed after he was supposed to return, then two. He’d been so specific, his plan already perfectly in order. He would bid his formal farewell to the princeling-prophet, be formally discharged, and then be home in time for a breakfast of eggs and ham the next day. The images seemed so clear in his letter.

Yet he hadn’t come, and so Henry made his pilgrimage. Had the prophet required him to stay? It wasn’t unheard of, but still so rarely done. 

The low roofs of the temple complex emerge, a patch of dull reds and blacks amidst the endless green. Henry fumbles with his cap and coins, wishing dearly that it will be Liam who greets him with some silly story of his replacement being utterly incompetent. 

But the servants that greet him are grim as statues, dressed in black.

---

Henry had questions, so many questions, but instead of answering any of them the old man simply guides him through the temple to a small glenn. 

The young man lounging under a great white-barked tree can only be the prophet, but the image is still so incongruous in Henry’s mind. He’d known the prophet was quite young. Liam had called him a sullen child on more than one occasion, but the prophets in the books were always old men. Priests who had served gods for a lifetime before becoming their voice for a year, perhaps two. Indeed if he didn’t know better the old man that strides across the meadow to whisper something into the prophet’s ear would seem a more proper prophet.

Henry chances a brief glance around, half starting as he does. There is a large black cat that can only be a panther sprawled rather close to Rudolf, a bone in her maw and a small cub playing with her tail. 

It’s a sight he’d never thought to see despite living close to these woods all his life. The god of death’s sacred creatures were silent as shadows and so very shy, especially females with cubs. 

The old servant stands, bowing to the prophet and retreating. It’s only then that Henry notices the second cub, tucked in the prophet’s arms and peacefully sleeping. 

“You seek your brother, yes?” The prophet has an unmistakable lordling’s accent, and his tone certainly speaks that he is used to being obeyed without question.

“Yes, Eminence.” Henry gives a stiff bow. There is something about the prophet that seems odd, but he can’t quite place it. The boy - for seeing the young prophet now he looks more like a teen boy than a man - is dressed richly, all in black save for a few hints of gold trim. He looks more like a spoiled prince than a proper prophet.

“I discharged him from my service several days ago.” The prophet sounds disinterested, and he’s rocking the little cub in his arms almost like one would a small child.

“He hasn’t returned home, Eminence.” Henry chances another glance at the panther. She’s paying a sort of lazy attention now, the bone still between her paws. A shiver runs down Henry’s back. Her claws are out to grasp the bone and they are gigantic. For all she almost looked like an overgrown housecat at first, the part of him that wants to flee is growing larger by the moment and that same part of him whispers in his ear. He’d thought the bone was that of a deer, but it seemed perhaps a bit too long. 

“Ah.” The prophet gave a sort of smile that made Henry want to simultaneously flee and strangle him. “You must know that once I have dismissed him from my service I have no sway over what road he takes.”

Henry’s hands ball into fists. Of course he knows that. Everyone knows that. But Liam wouldn’t write him letters, week in and week out, only to disappear to start a new life at the end of his service to the temple.

“My brother-” he snarls, temper flaring.

The panther growls, baring long white teeth that must be sharp as knives.

“Aemilia.” The prophet’s voice is amused, and Henry hates him more than he’s ever hated anything else before.

The panther settles slightly, but there is nothing of the vague disinterest from earlier in her eyes. Henry looks into them and sees his own hate and fury reflected back at him.

The moment is broken a moment later as the panther whirls, picking up the cub that had been playing with her tail, and crosses the distance to the prophet in a single bound, depositing the cub with him before turning and glaring at Henry once more, her muscles tense and ready to pounce, the bone forgotten and alone, barely visible in the long grasses.

“James.” The prophet raises his voice, and the old man is there again. “This pilgrim has become overcome.”

Henry is being escorted out again a moment later, his mind reeling. Liam had a life waiting for him. He wouldn’t just leave, would he? People could change in five years, Henry knew that, but the Liam in the letters always seemed like the brother he’d grown up with.

[mandy4ever69420]

in seasons 1-10 the only times mickey shows interest in topping (incomplete language - referring also to having sex with women) it's been an expression of psychological distress or being unsafe. this pattern emerged by coincidence mostly but fits pretty well also into mickey's casual tone leading people to not take him entirely seriously.

see: "my dad will kill me" - it sounds like hyperbole, because people say things like this as hyperbole, so ian assumes he must be at least slightly overreacting

especially when he refers to incarceration his casual tone laughs off "being somebody's bitch" and people don't tend to take prison, even child prison, as seriously as i think they should. mickey generally builds a pretty impressive defense mechanism against facing how scary things are by saying them straight up so people don't follow up. a lot of his plot involves the story asking you to take something seriously that he says as though it's a joke. this also has to do with the complicated maneuvers he has to do around the closet. when mandy says he only asks for "girl-on-girl porn" it did immediately occur to me that he'd found a non-gay way to ask for gay porn.

mickey's sleeping with women is another topic where he can mostly find it easy to look away from the hard parts of how it feels. technically speaking, none of the women he slept with did anything wrong. though it does feel relevant to note: we are introduced to the fact that mickey covers for himself by actually having sex with women (rather than implying it, or just bearding like ian and mandy) a literal single scene after he confronts a manipulative pedophile. in a similar piece of framing, we don't learn mickey is gay until after we've learned that his dad is a nazi

his deal with byron is kind of an outlier as the least outright sad occurrence of this, because he's not actively having THAT much of a meltdown. he is, however, making a very direct point, basically to ian's face. both ian and the viewer are made excruciatingly aware that this guy is not somebody mickey would ever seriously pursue. he does it to hammer home the point that he's never going to seriously want to pursue anybody BUT ian. mickey is immediately cognizant of the exact kind of self worth meltdown ian is having (because he's seen it before) and this time he's figured out the retrospectively obvious fact that the best way to get ian out of his own way is to just piss him off. when he tried making his devotion more obvious to reassure ian in s6 it just fed into ian's guilt complex about making mickey act like he loved him. byron is given the unfortunate hand of being picked out as a sort of a parody of everything mickey doesn't want in life. sorry dude.

i've said it before but to reiterate: the fact that mickey is making a strategic choice here doesn't negate that he's feeling vulnerable and hurt. he's just not one to linger on that sort of thing and prefers to move forward with gritted teeth. pragmatism in the most ridiculous dramatic way

i think there was a pretty good opportunity to tie all of this up^ with like a nice bow in 11.03 by either working with a "maybe the discomfort gained from a lifetime of being pressured into something i wasn't that into doesn't have to have power over me anymore even just once to prove my point with someone i do trust" angle OR by taking this from an potentially miss-able subtext into something more overt - if mickey's worrying about being the "man" is it an indication that something else is going on in his head that we need to worry about?

so it's just. infuriating to me that instead this episode is written like an intro to gay relationships. because we couldve been making points here people. nevermind that it barely sidestepped the slightly interesting "bottoming isn't womanly, and womanly isn't bad" there was much more potential there! well let's simply hope that framing mickey as making some sort of concession by regularly bottoming, whoever decided to write that isn't fucking anyone. because jesus christ

[nitunio]

Me and my bestie fawn over Shiro because to us he is autism rep that kind of gets overlooked

kind, has looks -> yet no friends or dating experience (gets pointed out often) -> not many interaction with peers during school days either (wanted to write it off as him being from (lower?) middle class and working shifts instead of socialising, but text doesn't mention anything about that, and suggests he didn't interact on school time either)

weird speech patterns

repetitive phrase structure ("As expected" and others used often)

oblivious to subtlety / misunderstands subtlety (the whole. ryou boat date situation)

takes phrases literally (okarin points out that he reminds him of yuki in this way)

missing social cues

It's rare to see characters like this but I really understand Shiro. Me n my bestie write a lot off the existing canons so sometimes it strays away from it, but with Shiro I can really say that the points all lead to him being autistic (or at least adjacent to).

And later with these patterns and his kind nature it's seen that he learned phrases he could lean on, and his default really seems to be about being understanding and soft to others.

With Ryou. He's also 100% honest and 100% not taking whatever mental gymnastics Ryou is doing (because he simply doesn't see most of it). Which I think is the driving force to their relationship. Like Ryou says in his face when he doesn't like something about him or has anything to say ever, which is good, because there's little subtext to it and little margin to misunderstand. (im not bringing his tsundereish love for him into this. And Shiro likes gap moe so it's irrelevant here)

And Shiro is kind to listen whenever Ryou complains and goes with whatever antics of his. With an exception of actually holding Ryou accountable, because to Shiro there isn't any mental pressure that prevents him from confronting Ryou (as seen in 7th? anni story (the whole. thing abt the suitcase) and pt 6, where he first corners him out of backpedaling from videocalling ZOOL and then tells him not to insult them)

And we see the same thing with Yuki when he talks with Ryou. He outright says that he hates him but with Yuki it's kind of like. Ryou hates Yuki, so seeing how he doesn't respond to subtlety is making him seethe because there's nothing to attack (and so later the only thing he could one-up him with is by taking Momo's safety away)

I'm rambling again

Shiro autism win. Might come back with more

[vintage-bentley]

david and michael gave an interview to PRIDE which I find quite interesting in itself but I still have no idea what to make of their answers. david's seems encouraging and then michael's dampens my hopes a little. it plays into that whole "this isn't a gay love story - this is a love story that everybody can relate to" thing straight actors do and which I always hate so much.

“He’s no longer having to toe the company line when it comes to being a demon,” Tennant tells PRIDE. “So he can sort of allow himself to be a little more honest about how he feels about some things and that can be quite challenging for him, but it also allows him to maybe confront some truths that he’s been denying.”

"You know at its heart, it is a story about love, I don’t think Neil [Gaiman] would want to shortchange that story in any way whatsoever,” adds Sheen on the possibility of romance in Aziraphale and Crowley’s future. “So [he] wouldn’t want it to be reductive in any way and wouldn’t want to put too many labels on that in any way, but to always have the possibility that in the most inclusive way possible, it can be a story that speaks of love to everybody who watches it.”

Ughhhh that’s disheartening. Straight people should shut the fuck up about this sort of thing forever and I mean that. They have no idea what it’s like to not ever see your sexuality represented, especially in your formative years when it’s most important. To them, the idea of “not having a label” is great and progressive because they’ve never needed a label—straight is seen as the default. To me as a homosexual, labels do matter. Because saying words like gay, lesbian, or homosexual out loud is often the only way to make it click for ignorant people. The types who see two women cuddling and think they’re “just such good friends!” Because heteronormativity is so engrained in their brains, that they don’t even consider homosexuality as a possibility.

If you want to have characters that are “inclusive” and “for everybody”, do it with a straight couple. As I’ve said so many times, there are so many straight couples of all kinds in media, so one being left up for interpretation won’t make a dent. But with gay couples? It’s like, 1-3 per genre (that are not always even healthy, happy, and alive). We simply aren’t at the point with gay representation where leaving same sex couples “up for interpretation” is a good thing. Especially when “up for interpretation” is usually code for bait or no-homo.

Not to mention, when you leave a gay couple “up for interpretation” instead of explicitly gay, you’re letting homophobes win. They don’t want to see gay couples. They’d absolutely love to look at the ineffable husbands and see them as just friends. Why give them that grace, instead of telling them “no, these characters are gay and in love with each other, you need to deal with that”?

What I’m trying to get at, is that no, having a gay couple be explicitly gay isn’t “reductive”. What’s truly “reductive” is allowing heteronormativity and homophobia to win by reducing same sex attraction to subtext, and allowing it to be interpreted as Not Gay.

I don’t understand why that isn’t obvious. It baffles me that people seem to think obscurity and vagueness is better than explicit gay representation. And it’s sad that this is coming from Sheen, who seems to get so much right about Aziraphale and homosexuality. At the end of the day he’s straight, so I guess that’ll always show through eventually.

[raelynnteam]

A blog post from Jaina, 12/3/23

Friday December 1st the associate superintendent Karen Arnold singled me out under the guise of enforcing policy. She claimed it was against policy for me to be wearing a white shirt. She was too cowardly to address it with me personally. She went to my counselor and had HIM direct me to change my shirt. Ashley and I later discussed it with the counselor and asked to see the policy that directed us to exchange all our white shirts for grey ones. No such policy or written directive exists. Instead we were shown a state issue property list that is absent any mention of white shirts however, the clothing room was still issuing white shirts after this property list was added to policy, they had simply switched to ordering only grey shirts at that time. So to interpret this list to be a directive to exchange all white shirts for grey ones is simply a convenient weapon to turn against me. There is no such policy that says I am not allowed to wear the white shirts issued to me by this prison's own clothing room, that is absurd.

This is the same associate superintendent who was firmly convinced that Ashley and I were guilty of the previous bogus accusations. So convinced that she ignored the Unit Supervisor's investigation and conducted her own, spanning over the course of 90 days.

That same day I watched several other inmates wearing white shirts to whom nobody said anything. Another administrative staff member was in the unit the same day having a conversation with an inmate wearing a white shirt. Nobody directed this other inmate to change their shirt. Even my celly was wearing a white shirt, and still does.

Her complaint was that you could see my bra outlined through the white shirt. (Oh god, can't have that, someone might mistake that faggot for a woman.)

Side note: Please forgive my profanity, sarcasm, and facetious humor. My goal is simply to illustrate the point. I include hateful speech because it underlines the subtext of hateful actions against me, and I want my readers to feel the outrage that I feel.

Targeted for being trans in prison, what else is new?

I'd wager that woman misgenders me on purpose when I'm not around. She is incapable of seeing: a woman assigned male at birth trying desperately to present as female. She just thinks I'm: some faggot trying to sexually entice men. It's really sad too, because her attitude isn't just damaging to transwomen, it also serves to reinforce the patriarchal ideal that women in general are just objects of male sexual desire.

Her defensive posturing with the counselors was to express her concern for my safety as there are many sex offenders here. It saddens me that she feels compelled to force me to disguise the fact that I am a woman and hide my femininity for fear that her staff could not otherwise ensure my safety.

Also, let me just say that I was wearing was not at all provocative, and I am appalled by her attitude which is closely akin to: "she was asking for it, I mean did you see how she was dressed?"

Fact is, I wasn't doing anything inappropriate or else I would have been infracted. If the policy did in fact call for everyone to exchange their previously issued white shirts for grey ones by a certain date, then she should have enforced it the same for everyone, rather than singling me out for matters related to my gender. She just felt compelled to harass me about something, because she dislikes that I'm allowed to be a woman.

Hilariously, as it turns out, you can still tell I have breasts when I'm wearing a grey shirt, so maybe they should just put chastity devices on all the sex offenders since we can't keep them all separated from the apparent temptation of a woman within reach of their rapist paws. Oh wait, some of the staff are women too! Cisgendered women who look distinctively feminine without going to great lengths to present as such! I guess the only solution for women to be safe within these gates is to castrate all the rapists. No wait, just have all the women disguise themselves as men, so the rapists can't recognize them. Of course we would still have to worry about the GAY rapists mistaking us for men...

OR MAYBE THERE COULD BE CAMERAS ALL OVER THE PLACE AND UNIFORMED OFFICERS WALKING ABOUT WITH PEPPER SPRAY AND RADIOS, and women could just be ourselves.

Q.E.D. Nobody's safe in prison (or everyone is safe because the supervision is adequate).

Don't make silly excuses to justify your prejudice. I will always call out your transphobic bullshit.

[windor-truffle]

ok vent post time, time to be a cheria/asbel hater 😩 I really don't want to rip apart this ship considering I like both characters and think they have the potential to be interesting if handled well... I just don't think canon handles them well 😓 For now I'm just going to look at them from the context of where I am in the story rn (their fight after Raymond's failed blackmail attempt), but maybe later I can do a follow-up post covering the whole game (and L&L which iirc does a better job of writing them romantically, if only marginally):

I have to lead this off by noting this is a terrible display from Asbel 😩 he's acting just like his dad did, being angry at the person for making him worry, though at least he hasenough sense to not fucking hit her over it -_- Yet here Asbel's being almost more unfair, as at least in Aston's case his 11 year old son had snuck away unsupervised and had his friends lie about where he was. But Cheria's old enough to not require adult supervision and mature enough to decide what degree of personal risk she's willing to take... and like she says, it's not like she even meant to be in danger in the first place, she just heard something she wasn't supposed to and got caught at it. But I'm not here to bash Asbel's character, in fact I think it's great that they're showcasing his flaws in this fight. Asbel is consistently characterized as someone who gets angry when he's really just feeling upset (*coughtoxicmasculinity coughmencan'tshowfeelingsbesidesrighteousanger*) and it makes sense for that negative trait to make an appearance in this circumstance.

It's pretty clear that both sides are fighting because they care about each other but rather than admit that, they're angry at the other for making them worry. But i'd say it's more or less healthy to air out these riled up emotions first so they can get to the heart of the matter that they've been avoiding:

This is all good! They needed to talk this out, even if it required them hitting a boiling point of emotions first. But the problem I have here is that this is only the beginning of an apology from both sides. They're finally being honest about why they did what they did, the choices they made seven years ago, but even though they're admitting it there's no evidence in this moment that the other actually understood, empathized, or forgave the other for that. There IS some evidence in the moments leading up to this, gathered rather piecemeal-y:

(I swear there's a line where Cheria admits "I know why you had to leave" but I can't find it 😩)

But in this moment, this fight and subsequent conversation and chance to make amends, neither one manages to verbally accept the other's feelings. Asbel doesn't acknowledge how the repercussions of the choice he made 7 years ago affected those he left behind. Cheria doesn't recognize that Asbel's method of coping with the grief of losing Sophie due to his own helplessness was to take action, to do SOMETHING because he couldn't then and is terrified of losing someone again. He was hurting, but so was she, and maybe they could have healed better with each other's company, but the actions they took and feelings they felt were completely justified to them at the time.

But like I said before, my issue is with how they end this argument and "fix" their relationship. Maybe it's foolish of me to expect a clear and explicit apology from these awkward teenagers' first attempt at romance (couldn't help but note that neither one actually says "I'm sorry" though), or lazy of me to expect the writers to spell it out when I so happily read into the subtext for other aspects of the story, but to me, the resolution of this fight implies that the underlying issues, though aired, have not been resolved. Since they never actually apologize, the part of the apology where you make plans to improve yourself and avoid hurting each other in the future has also been skipped. Instead, they've decided to simply drop the issue. This isn't a bad thing, as sometimes it's better to just drop it and move on, but that feels like a surface-level manner of resolving this personal grudge and subsequent dispute accrued over seven years, and it mostly functions just to keep the peace in the short term. We're supposed to believe that these characters have or want an intimate relationship in the long term, but they fall back on prideful denials and awkward smiles instead of clear communication. It's like they're in love with the idea of being in love with each other, without the underlying love. Attraction, sure, and affection, but not the kind of selfless love where you want what's best for the other. And for me, it's hard to get invested in that not when Richass is right there

I hope to come back to this topic because with careful examination I do think that the subtext for a healthy or at least interesting relationship is there, and I don't want to be uncharitable toward these characters just because of my bias for the gay pairing. This ship, though canon, is generally unpopular with the fandom, and I'd like to explore how much of that is justified, and where it went right or wrong. So... stay tuned for a follow-up? ^^' (<- the face of one with good intentions but bad executive function)

[gayest-non-canon-showdown]

Khatha from Midnight Museum. (Spoilers Ahead) (Also Very Long I'm So Sorry)

Look first he brother-zones himself when he meets this strange guy (Chan) with magic powers that he's obviously into but instead of kissing he asks if they can become sworn brothers instead

Then Chan's pwoers get discovered by their village and he basically becomes a god to them and is thus alienated from Khatha. They get in a fight, Khatha tries to join the army after being told it is a way to "win one's beloved," unintentionally leads the army to go execute Chan who curses Khatha to immortality.

Khatha does not cope with this at all and spends literally a hundred years just holding Chan's corpse and crying. Eventually he's found and starts a museum of cursed items, etc, etc. Then about 200 years after he met Chan, he's just walking down the street when he passes this guy who looks exactly like Chan. Like carbon copy the same. And he chases after him and sees him leaving a flower shop with a bouquet of Lily of the Valley (which is like a recurring symbol of the return of a beloved throughout the series). Romantic music is also playing with slow motion and everything (except they're not canonically a couple).

Long story short, Chan-look-a-like is actually a guy named Dome with zero memory of Khatha and ends up working at the museum and other plot things happen. Khatha discovers that Dome actually has no memories at all until a few months back, where he apparently came from the sky and took over this guy's life without realizing it. He's also spent multiple scenes now just like watching security cam footage of Dome and crying. Khatha then buys Dome a crystal anklet that he paid a couple billion dollars USD for, in order to protect Dome from his own power (Dome's magic). He puts it on Dome's ankle in like the most romantic way except it's "technically" not romantic.

Long story short, Dome ends up in a coma and trapped in limbo. It turns out that Dome isn't Chan but someone completely different (they're like some angelic beings/probably part of the 4 horsemen of the apocalypse). Khatha gets told by the embodiment of Death that he needs to focus on what he has now (Dome) instead of focusing on the past (Chan). Khatha tries everything to bring Dome back. The apocalypse happens. Chan is resurrected into Dome's body via a cult's ritual. Chan kills Khatha. Khatha ends up on a meteor with Dome in front of the dying corpse of God. They talk about wanting to stay together (but also with the rest of the gang too) and Khatha is then convinced that he needs to go back to the world to save it and allows God to send him back but not before a hug (also Khatha might be God now).

Plot stuff happens. Khatha has to kill Chan and they have a soft moment together. Dome is sent to another universe where he's a soldier in WWII. Khatha is like determined to find him and rejects an offer from Death to simply forget about Dome and become God (in the way that Death wants him to do at least). He embarks on this whole quest to "find his missing piece" and that "there's someone waiting for me." He finds Dome and they run off together into the sunset in the middle of a battlefield.

All of this, with zero confirmation of their relationship beyond subtext (as far as I'm aware they're not even word of God canon. like the show is 100% marketed as a bromance and technically remains as such and the creators afaik haven't even teased them being romantically together). This is despite their two main narrative parallels being Adam and Eve and a gay couple. Also despite the fact that the actor playing Chan/Dome is like very well known for all of his queer roles and is like super famous for that. AND YET................

Thank you for your submission!