#insecure immature child who could never accept a dollop of blame and could never have a confrontation face to face | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

sakebytheriver · 1 year ago

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When someone ends a friendship with you and they clearly think you're the toxic one and they were the innocent that never did anything wrong, while you were the bitch that had to constantly over apologize for the smallest thing or else they'd end the friendship and the way they end it is through one text message where they hit you with a 'im done with second chances' whereas you ate so much shit with a grin on your face and the concept of 'chances' in friendships in general never occurred to you and now as you go back over the friendship you realize how onesided everything was and how much work you put in to receive absolutely nothing back and how you got so lost in the toxicity of it all and just how bad a friend they actually were and now you regret saying you'd 'fight for this friendship' because ultimately they were not your friend the same way you were theirs 🙃

#ignore me #personal #five years of friendship ended in one text message #and now as i go over everything #im like wow #what a bad friend #insecure immature child who could never accept a dollop of blame and could never have a confrontation face to face #like the longer i look at it the more exhausted i feel #ive felt for months like i was waiting for this moment #like she was just waiting for me to screw up so she could hit me with that fucking 'im done with second chances'#like fuck you bro #do you know how 'second chances' i had to give you without ever once brining it up to you #chronic insecurity mixed with her inability to handle confrontation and any kind of negative emotion #meant i had to be perfect or else i would get cut off #the way i told my therapist about it and she was like friendship shouldnt feel like youre on probation #and i was like omg thats exactly what it was #i was on probation for fucking months and i couldnt be a human being and mess up or else shed be ready to end everything #like i really did feel so on edge and like i had to walk on eggshells with her #and its like weve known each other for 5 years #it shouldnt feel like this #and shes going to go through her life thinking that i was the problem and that it was me who was the toxic one who couldnt change enough to #be her firend which is just the most frustrating part of it all #like im not a petty enough person to go and text her all of my grievances and make her feel like shit for how she did me dirty #but if i could go back in time i wouldnt say i wish i could change her mind #id tell her that i worked so hard to be perfect for her and she never once put in the same effort for me and that im sorry i wasted so much #of my life on trying to be her friend when it was obvious she didnt want to try and be mine

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