#incredible synapses firing this morning

[grichel]

called baby2 “my liege” instinctively just now.

[dreamingofmilk]

Home Cooking Part 1

Synopsis: You’re a great cook, so you want to cook for Bucky. You never knew what good food would do for him.

Honey lemon pepper fried chicken, mac and cheese, collard greens with turkey neck and ham hock, garlic and cheese mashed potatoes, and fresh banana pudding. That's everything you've been cooking since early this morning to celebrate Bucky coming back from his mission. You woke up at 5am and made everything from scratch, just the way your mom taught you. Bucky was always really hungry when he came over, and you've cooked for him plenty of times before, but nothing like this.

You got the idea a few weeks ago right before Bucky left for the mission. He was over your house again, he practically lived there, and you both were cuddled up on the couch watching Project Runway. You'd gotten him addicted and it was your go to show to watch together. You both found the pettiness of the contestants hysterical.

Three Weeks Ago

As you both laid there you heard Bucky's stomach growl. It was so strong you felt the vibration on your back. You laughed, "Damn Buck!" You didn't have to turn around to know he was blushing.

He huffed, "Sorry doll. Do you have any snacks?"

He had already eaten most of your snacks. The man was like a bottomless pit. You shook your head. "Nope, you ate them all last time remember?" He pouted, "Babe! Please I'm starving!" You held your hands up, "Alright alright! I can make you something."

Bucky's smile was blinding. "Thank you babe!" He grabbed you and gave you a few quick pecks, speaking in between kisses. "Thank you, thank you, thank you."

You rolled your eyes, "Yeah yeah, let me up." Once you got to your fridge you found the ingredients to make your favorite cream cheese dip, a recipe your dad threw together one day that became a huge hit. You quickly assembled everything, making sure to put extra jalapenos, and put it in the oven to cook.

Once it was done you grabbed a bag of chips and made your way back to the couch. Bucky was practically salivating by the time you sat the bowl down.

“This smells amazing!” Bucky wasted no time opening the chips and scooping a generous portion of the dip. As he did, it created a perfect cheese pull and the steam wafted off. He was unconcerned, he popped the whole chip in his mouth. It’s a wonder the man has any taste buds left.

He chewed a few times then moaned. It was the sexiest thing you’d ever heard, it honestly sounded pornographic. You clenched your thighs together to try to relieve the tension you felt between your legs. Before you could react, he was grabbing another chip and popping it in his mouth. This time his eyes rolled back and he whimpered. “Fuck, baby this is so good!” You were still reeling from the noises he made. You have never seen someone react to good food that way. You felt like your food was turning him on.

After finishing your movie snack, you both laid back down, bellies full of the hot dip. You had to find out why Bucky reacted the way he did. You just found the whole thing interesting. A few minutes after the final credits started to roll, you turned around and looked at Bucky. “So, do you have a food fetish or something?” You didn”t sound accusational or anything, just curious.

Bucky broke the eye contact and you could see his face flush red. “Yeah, sorry about that. I tend to overreact to good food. I’ll calm down with it.”

You were shaking your head before he finished. “No! You shouldn’t be embarrassed about it! I just thought it was sexy as hell! I”ve just never seen anyone react like that before. It was like the food was literally turning you on.”

His face just got redder, “That’s exactly what happens. It’s a side effect of the serum. I was always a very sensual person. Food especially always excited me and I loved to eat before the serum, but now that my senses are heightened I can taste even more now and it’s all so much stronger, so it affects my body way more than it used to.”

You took all of this in and stored it in the back of your mind for later. So your boyfriend had a food kink. If he got this excited about some cream cheese dip, he’d lose his mind over a full soul food meal. You grinned to yourself at the thought. You’d definitely have to try that sometime.

Present Day

You couldn’t keep the smile off your face as you did your magic in the kitchen. You were already excited to see Bucky after being apart for two weeks, but you also couldn’t wait to see his reaction to all this food. You were so happy that you could do something like this for him. Something that he’d no doubt enjoy immensely. This was a whole lot of work, but Bucky was always so good to you. You wanted to return the favor somehow.

You were pulled out of your thoughts when Bucky unlocked the door. You could hear his boots thumping against the floor as he put his coat and keys away. “Y/N?” You didn’t realize how much you’d missed his voice until now.

You smiled to yourself, “I’m in the kitchen Buck.” You felt a surge of nervousness as his footsteps grew closer, his bare feet padding across the wood floors. When he came into view, your instinct kicked in and you immediately ran to him and jumped in his arms, your legs wrapping around his waist. He was surprised, but he caught you with ease, his strong arms wrapping around you. “I missed you, baby. It’s been a long two weeks.”

You pressed your nose into his neck, breathing deeply. “I missed you too, Bucky. So fucking much.” You both stayed there for a while, familiarizing yourselves with each other’s bodies and scents like you’d been apart for a year instead of just two weeks.

Bucky suddenly perked up, and started walking further into the kitchen, with you still attached to him. “Something smells amazing. What are you cooking?”

You pulled back to look into his eyes, closely monitoring his expression. “I know you are always starving when you get back from missions, and that you appreciate a good meal, so I made you some soul food. The kind of food I grew up eating.”

You hopped down from him and started dishing everything up. “There’s fried chicken, mac and cheese, collard greens, and mashed potatoes. And later we can have banana pudding for dessert.” You made Bucky a plate, piling it high with everything.

Next to you, Bucky didn’t know what to feel. Part of him was so happy, so overjoyed that you took time out of your weekend to make him food. And so much of it! This had to have taken you hours, and you did it just for him. His heart swelled with love at the thought of you working so hard just to make him food. He really had the best girlfriend in the whole world. But, there was another part of him that was horny as fuck. There was something undeniably sexy about his woman spending all day in the kitchen so he’d have a nice meal when he came home. Bucky wasn’t a chauvinist, but the barbaric part of him could appreciate the domesticity of this entire situation.

You handed him the plate with a smile, the sweetest smile. It honestly just made Bucky want to fuck you on the kitchen counter, meal be damned. But his stomach won out. He was starving and all of the good smells from his plate were making him salivate. He’d satiate this hunger so he can take care of the other one after. To show his appreciation, he sat the plate down, grabbed you, and gave you the filthiest, panty-dropping kiss you’d ever experienced. A few minutes of that, and you’d cum on the spot. When he pulled away, he smirked, “Thank you baby. This looks amazing. It makes me hungry for something else too though. I’ll take care of that later.”

Whew! That man was fucking dangerous. You couldn’t even move. Niagara Falls had taken residence between your legs, and you weren’t sure if you could even walk. Tonight was going to be a good night that’s for sure. After Bucky walked into the dining room you made yourself a plate, grabbed 2 beers and made your way to the table as well.

You sat down across from Bucky, and you both said your prayers before digging in. You were just about to take your first bite when all you heard was the dirtiest, filthiest moan you’ve ever heard right across from you. Your head whips up and all you see is Bucky’s eyes, pupils blown wide. He had taken a huge bite out of a chicken breast. His face was flushed, and he was rolling his eyes as he chewed, barely swallowing before he shoveled the next bite in. As if he could feel you staring at him, he took a quick pause and looked over at you. “Baby, this is the best food I’ve ever had in my life. Honestly, thank you so much for doing all of this. I love you so much.”

You beamed, so pleased that he liked your food. “You’re welcome babe, you deserve it. You’re always so good to me.”

He reached across the table and grabbed your hand, “I’m gonna be really good to you later.” He winked and started cleaning the chicken bone. You never would have thought that you’d find watching someone eat sexy, but Bucky proved you wrong. There was something so manly about the way he tore into his food, especially when he really liked it. Every few bites, he’d suck on his fingers, or lick his lips and it was honestly driving you crazy. You could barely focus on your own plate, your hunger for him starting to overpower your empty stomach.

Finally finished with his chicken, he moved on to the mac and cheese. He shoveled a huge portion in his mouth and groaned, “Fuck, this is so good.” By the time he got to the collard greens, he was actively moaning, and you were about to lose your shit. He sounded like he was going to cum just from eating. It was incredibly fascinating, but it was making you horny as hell.

While you were having your inner monologue, Bucky was living his best life. He knew the food was going to be good. You've never made anything he didn’t love, but this was a different level altogether. He had never had food this good in his entire life. Every bite fired off every synapse in his brain, the rush of endorphins enough to make the average man pass out. All it did for Bucky was make him hard as a rock. He'd have to have Y/N cook for him more often.

He polished off the rest of his plate, scraping everything he could into his mouth. The satisfaction was overwhelming, or at least it was until his dick twitched and reminded him of the other hunger he was supposed to be satiating.

He looked over at Y/N. "Come here, baby." His voice was soft, but it was very clear that he wasn't asking. You make your way over to him, your legs weakening more and more by the second. Bucky patted his lap, "Sit right here." You sat down and leaned into his chest as he rubbed your thighs. "Thank you again for that amazing meal baby. It was the best I've ever had."

Your sweet smile just made him harder, and he made sure to push his bulge into your ass. Bucky grabbed your ass and started grinding you on his dick. "But now I'm hard as fuck Y/N. You shouldn't have fed me such good food, baby."

You moaned, the pleasure starting to overwhelm you already. "I just wanted to make you as happy as you make me Buck."

He laughed, "Oh you succeeded babe. Now I'm gonna make you happy." And with that he stood up, holding your ass as you wrapped your arms and legs around him to keep from falling.

"Bucky! Warn a girl next time!"

His laughter carried through the whole house. "Where's the fun in that?"

"You could have dropped me!"

Bucky scoffed, "Please, you know damn well I can carry you with one arm. Don't play that shit with me." He took a short pause before a devious smile appeared on his face. "Matter fact, I'll show you just how strong I am. Especially since you fueled me with all this good food."

Taglist: @aislinnsilver @wawakanda-btch @chaneajoyyy

[emoselenas]

woodland creatures - day 3 (orlando)

the first thing i woke up to on my birthday, monday, september 23rd on an air mattress was my google assistant singing happy birthday to me. which is unfortunately not like rolling over to the sight of my hot boyfriend, but i was on tour with my closest friends, so i was perfectly content. 

right as tour started i was still getting over the roughest cold i’ve had in years, and up until this particular morning i was still feeling super shitty on and off. we had a long drive ahead of us to orlando, but i needed meds so badly just in case. i felt fine thanks to the nyquil i took last night and the dayquil i then took (thanks matt), but i barely made it through the gig the night before. like BARELY. i was holding up and then the tickle in my throat returned in the middle of synapse fires, our last song in the set. we made a target run and then hit up a bagel shop. navigating target stores away from home is so difficult, i wish it was easier to get in and out. but target runs are always fun with these guys.

i was behind the wheel for the orlando drive, so i got to play whatever i wanted. we listened to some music and then an episode of my brother, my brother and me, my favorite podcast. the new episode wasn’t up yet so we just listened to the most recent one, crash bandicoot’s wallet chain (lol). i feel bad that podcasts are mostly what i listen to but everyone seemed to enjoy it, we were making dry aged food jokes for a couple days after. driving on tour is so zen, i can go for hours without stopping. i just hate pumping my own gas. 

drivers in florida are still as crazy as drivers in new jersey though. it’s tough to go fast in a huge van so people can be insensitive on the road. and sometimes turning is scary because you can feel the weight of the van shift. but otherwise it’s crazy easy. 

miraculously we made it early despite the long drive, and went to go get food after we parked in the venue lot. joe, kris and i went to hawker’s right across the street. it’s an asian street food restaurant, seemingly a lil upscale, but still on budget. the food was amazing. they showed us the size of the plates they were going to serve the food on which was SMOL, so i ordered 4 things. but it turned out to be too much food. i got a tiger salad which was grilled octopus and veggies in rice wine vinegar, steamed chicken dumplings, edamame, and one other thing i’m forgetting haha. it sucks, i have to be hyper conscious of what i eat before i sing because of acid reflux and just general discomfort so i couldn’t get anything crazy. but despite my dietary restrictions i still had an amazing meal.

load-in was super easy and chill. we set our merch up early and just hungout. i thought it was super suspicious that literally EVERYONE seemed to disappear after we did, but i just figured everyone was getting food or something. at this show we gigged with charlene joan who is a singer-songwriter that i met in diy tour postings and all gone grey, who is my friend daisy’s band. i connected with daisy when i originally reached out to her other band i met a yeti to book them. they weren’t available but her other band was, so i was like NOPe yup this is also good. just wanted to gig with her!! loved having ladies on this show. and being friends with daisy is so cool because we have no girls in prog post-hardcore. i think like maybe native world, lucrecia (more prog metal but i think they still overlap) and that’s all i can think of. even though charlene wasn’t the same genre as us i literally did not give a fuck. she’s an incredible singer. and i love mixed genre shows. she was super amped about opening for the tour from the JUMP, promoted the gig, and she was an absolute sweetheart. i can’t sing enough praises about both these ladies and their bands, so lucky to know them. all awesome musicians. and charlene gave me a PLANT for my birthday!!!

so i consider orlando as the worst set i played. here’s why. and this is going to suck because it’s also the BIGGEST positive of the whole gig, but so, soooo many of my friends that live in orlando came out. so many!! holy shit. people i had not seen in almost a year or a whole year. i was seriously overwhelmed by the support. and a lot of these people were people who had never, ever seen me perform in any capacity. so i got in my head and got even more nervous about performing. i fucked up and cracked soooo much. and i couldn’t read the crowd as well as i could the night before, i couldn’t tell if anyone was into it at all. so that sucked, i felt like i could have done way better. it was still fun but i was still just so stressed. 

on our past tours i used to sulk around after a bad set but it was my birthday and i knew i was going to experience a horrible depressive episode if i didn’t try to combat it. i remembered what my therapist said about trying to accept compliments even if i disagree, and that there’s no use trying to read into anything or discern whether or not someone is lying to me about how well i performed to be fake (literally have seen people do this to others!!!) so i decided to just shake it off. i was all the more better for it. 

on this tour i’ve been doing taylor’s skit in i drink juice during pulses.’ set (an honor!!!). so, i go up to do my part for i drink juice, and i grab the mic. and the guys just, stop playing. and matt turns to me and he’s like “it’s sIERRA’S BIRTHDAAAY” and i was like “i just wanted to do the skit” lmfao

um literally the cutest moment though, they planned it literally like that day in a separate nd secret group chat with my bandmates :’))) and everyone disappeared earlier because they were trying to find me cupcakes for after the show hahaha. it was weird to not have a typical birthday this year but not complaining whatsoever. my friends made me very happy.

i got way too carried away with drinking, after being treated to some shots and seltzers i was too trashed to pack up merch myself hahaha. i literally kept apologizing to everyone for how useless i was and those poor people had to do everything for me. i’m not super fond of white claw (more of a truly/bon & viv guy), but they had mango and it was the one flavor i STILL hadn’t tried. it’s easily the best one. i was only pregaming for the party back at the airbnb in kissimmee. which... was one of the best ideas we had for this tour. holy shit. what a move. it was so sick having a whole house to ourselves. we arrive and it’s in a little suburban neighborhood with terra cotta houses. first thing we did was settle down with our taco bell feasts and then get in our bathing suits to go swimming in the pool. 

after swimming we played quiplash for a really long while. after a few games i looked at the clock and it’s like 3:30 am, holy shit we didn’t go to bed until 4. but i was having so, so much fun that i lost track of time. we all did. i was laughing until it hurt and just basking in the bliss that i felt.

[yespoetry]

Alex Z. Salinas: The Savage Screwball

The Savage Screwball

I was at Starbucks sipping coffee, reading Roberto Bolaño’s The Savage Detectives, when a feeling hit me: Everything was perfect.

The sensation was so striking I put the book down.

I looked outside: the sun was smiling, birds chirped, traffic advanced smoothly. The world was a mid-century postcard.

Emboldened, feeling especially good after my morning workout, I texted Vanessa if she could come over tomorrow night. I said I could cook lasagna and buy a bottle of red wine, her favorite.

“Here ya go,” said Madeline, the tall, beautiful barista with bright tattoo sleeves, placing a fresh-out-of-the-oven chocolate chip muffin in front of me. The waft of baked dough was delectable.

“Thank you. They don’t pay you enough,” I flirted.

“But I get to see that smile of yours,” she flirted back.

Oh Madeline. I imagined us spending a day at the beach, me admiring her resplendent body art when I heard a bang. A man had pushed open the door into Starbucks. He had dark skin, army fatigue pants, crazed homeless eyes. He stunk. He looked to be my dad’s age. He peered left, right, straight ahead, then spotted me. He marched right up to me.

“Hey, let me bum a few bucks, dude,” he said. He smelled like a dead animal. His face was like expired beef jerky.

I patted my pocketless basketball shorts—my wallet was on the table—and said:

“Sorry, sir. Don’t carry cash.”

The man’s face twisted in ugly directions—was plain ugly.

“Little prick,” he mumbled, then marched right out of Starbucks.

Despite the insult, what struck me most was that he was clean-shaven. Some things don’t add up only after you think about them.

I felt someone’s eyes pierce the back of my head, so I turned around and caught an old black woman shaking her permed head at me.

“Yes?” I said.

She swiftly lifted up her Vanity Fair magazine to cover her face, effectively blocking me out.

I see how it is, I thought. Then my phone buzzed. Mom.

“Hey, Mom, what’s going on?”

“Hi mijo, I hope you’re having a great weekend. Real quick, I’m calling to update you on the house situation. I’ve thought a lot about it and…we’ve decided to sell it. I know, I know, that’s not what you wanted, but I think selling’s the right move right now. Lance agreed. He said the market is—”

“I don’t care what Lance thinks,” I interrupted.

“Mijo.”

“No, I’ve already told you I’m willing—more than willing to take it over. The house is all I have left…all we have left of Dad.”

Mom stayed quiet for a few seconds.

“I know, mijo,” she said softly. “I know. But me and Lance—”

I hung up on her. It wasn’t that Lance was white—he was—or that he’d become Mom’s boyfriend six months after Dad’s heart attack. It was his predilection to butt into our family affairs, give his two-and-a-half cents when we were good on the money. Lance wasn’t a bad guy, I don’t think, but that didn’t mean I didn’t think him a snake slithering on my property. White people, like snakes, have no propriety when it comes to death and property.

I pictured myself stomping on a snake’s head then sipped my black coffee. It was now lukewarm. It had lost its desired effect—to burn my tongue.

I went back to my book. I read a sentence six times over. I couldn’t comprehend it for the life of me. Bolaño wasn’t Balzac, but I might as well have been blind.

I put the book down again and closed my eyes. I focused in on the song playing in the back. “Maria Maria” by Carlos Santana. I started bobbing my head and was immediately brought back to middle school football, being on bus rides with the boys. Falling asleep, drooling.

As Santana made his guitar sing, I placed myself in Spanish Harlem, like in the song. Maria Maria—living the life like a movie star. She was getting ready for our hot date, putting on her makeup. It was always me waiting for her, Maria. She took forever, always. “Beauty takes time,” she’d always tell me.

How amazing would it be if even just for ten seconds, I wondered, if I was Santana’s guitar—no, his fingers, his magical fingers with so much talent they could make guitars sing and moan, just like women? What would it be like, I wondered, to have millions of fans across the world chant my name, beg encores every single night like I was the god of music? Like I was…Santana?

The song finished and I found myself tapping my left foot like mad. I was anxious. I needed fresh air. It was my day off, after all, so I needed to enjoy it.

The rude homeless man was sitting on the sidewalk by the Starbucks entrance. He looked up at me, studied me for two seconds, and seemed not to remember me one bit. He was whacked out.

Finally, he asked, “Got a cigarette I can bum?”

I was taken aback by the politeness in his voice. I patted the sides of my shorts where there were no pockets.

“Sorry, sir. Don’t smoke.”

“Geez, who you gotta blow around here to get a smoke? The Muffin Man?”

My muffin! I’d left it uneaten on the plate. Like my coffee, it was getting colder—was probably already cold. But then, the homeless guy. My sympathy synapses had already started firing. If I couldn’t help the man get a smoke, the least I could do was feed him. Right?

“Hold on a sec,” I said.

A few seconds later, I was back outside, objects in hand.

“Take this,” I said, handing the muffin to the man, “and eat it.”

“And take this,” I said, handing him the coffee cup, “and drink it. This is my blood.”

He accepted the muffin and coffee hesitantly. He sniffed the muffin, as if trying to detect poison. Then he threw it hard into the street. I didn’t even blink. I watched the muffin get pulverized by oncoming traffic.

The man polished off the coffee in one swig, burped loud, then set the empty cup on the ground. He reached inside his camo pants and pulled out a crumpled cigarette and a lighter.

“You had one this whole time?” I said.

“Last one. I get ‘em where I can.”

My phone buzzed. A text from Vanessa.

I can’t come over. Ted is in town the next couple weeks.

“Doomed!” the homeless man shouted. “We’re all doomed!”

He tapped cigarette ashes into the cup. The Starbucks woman imprinted on it still smiled her green smile. I’d never smoked a day in my life, but in that moment, a cigarette sounded so good. Anything did. Anything but standing there with the crazy homeless man, thinking the thoughts I was thinking.

“Hey, do me a favor and toss this into the street, willya,” I said, handing the man my iPhone.

He accepted it hesitantly then said:

“And what do I get out of it?”

I paused.

“Cigarettes and a cheeseburger,” I answered finally.

He scratched his expired beef jerky chin.

“It’s gotta be from Whataburger, though. I don’t want no McDonald’s.”

I smiled.

“Deal,” I said.  

Without wasting any time he launched my iPhone hard into the street. It flew upward as though toward heaven then took a sudden cruel dive toward traffic. I saw it get obliterated. Smashed into a hundred little pieces. Nobody stopped. Nothing changed.

“Incredible,” I said.

“That’s my screwball. Pretty good, huh?”

“Fucking amazing,” I agreed, holding back tears.

Alex Z. Salinas lives in San Antonio, Texas. His short fiction has appeared in publications such as Every Day Fiction, Mystery Tribune, Nanoism, escarp, Pecan Grove Review, 101 Words, 101 Fiction, 365tomorrows, 121 Words, Friday Flash Fiction, and ZeroFlash. He serves as poetry editor of the San Antonio Review.

[frangipanidownunder]

Mulder and Scully are accidentally set up on a blind date by mutual acquaintances who don't know that they are partners.

Tingle: fic

She grabs her briefcaseand heads to the door, bidding him goodnight in as normal a voice as she canmuster. He’s suddenly beside her, hand on the small of her back, escorting herinto the dark basement floor maze. It’s late. Later than she intended to leaveand she strides out.

           “In a hurry, Scully?”

           She opens her mouth to respond buthe’s wearing that grin again, the one that makes her tingle. She’s never beensure if the firing in her synapses is because he exasperates her or because heexcites her. Maybe it’s a combination of the two. She’s never met a man whodisplays so many childlike tendencies and yet manages to be empathetic, intellectuallydemanding and incredibly charming.

           “Got a date?” She ignores him but hepresses on. “Someone going to bust down those walls and find out who the realDana Scully is?” He’s seriously grating on her now. That tone, bordering onintrusive but with a touch of amusement. He’s digging for gossip. She finds hercar keys.

           “Cos I have,” he says, smiling asher car bleeps open. “Got a date. A blind date,” he says, drawing out the wordslike gum. “Wish me luck. I hear she’s a firecracker so I might have thirddegree burns by the morning.”

           In her mind, she’s thinking, if thatfirecracker finds out who the real Fox Mulder is, she better run a mile. Insteadshe says, “I’m sure you can handle her.”

She doesn’t know whatto wear. She bought new jeans on the weekend and a body, high necked crimsonvelvet. But it feels all wrong when she tries the outfit on, like there’s toomuch of her, it adds a layer, something tactile, like she’s more than she is. Sheremoves it and it lays on her bed, still in the shape of her. She buttons up thedusky pink silk blouse and tucks it into her jeans, threading her black patentleather belt through the holds. She slips on black heeled pumps, smoothes herhands over her ass as she looks over her shoulder into the mirror. Her hair isup, but tendrils fall around her face. She dabs perfume at her pulse points andsighs.

How did she get herself into this mess? A new job was one thing, but anew boyfriend too? Tash at Bean, the corner coffee shop, was hardly a friend,so what had possessed her to agree to this date? Her stomach sinks. She untucksthe blouse. Is loose better? Or does that say something else? She’s not sureshe’s ready to make a statement about anything, let alone who Dana Scully is.

She wonders how Mulder’s feeling. Or perhaps she should be moreconcerned about how Mulder’s date is feeling. Firecracker. What sort ofpejorative, sexist insult is that? As she hails a cab she hopes MissFirecracker blows a rocket up his arrogant ass.

Her date is late andshe’s squirming in her seat, nursing a nerve-emboldening gin and tonic andwishing she led a life that leant itself to small talk. What was your week like, Dana? Oh, I got run off the road by men inblack and rescued my dumbass partner from a secret military base where he gothis memories sucked out of his nose. How about you? She laughs to herselfand shakes her head. She’s going to lay into Tash tomorrow. Seriously, this isa disaster. If Mulder ever finds out about this, he’ll laugh at her until nextyear.

           There’s a familiar smell undernostrils before she can register what’s happening. “Isn’t it nice to besuddenly so highly regarded? Who did you tick off to get this blind date,Scully?” He kisses her cheek and it burns under his lips. He sits opposite herand grins. It makes her tingle. “How was your week?”

[boneswriteswords]

The angsty idea about the reader over hearing how their turtle is attaracted to April is soooo sooo sooo good! If you take requests and it wouldn't be too much of a burden, could I request that for Mikey?!??

A/N: I finally got around to doing this. I’m not 100% happy with it but I’m never 100% happy with anything I write so whatever. Lol

Its also unbeta’d like all my other stuff. 

Enjoy.

Its almost 2500 words of angst tho so you might not.

You felt like you couldn’t breathe, the unexpected rush ofpain tasted like tinfoil, razorblade sharp on your tongue.

It had been a good day, the world bathed in shades of paleyellow. You were working at a job that you loved and that paid well. You had paidoff one of your student loans in full, dramatically decreasing your debt. Yoursupervisor had surprised you with donuts and an extra week of paid vacation as a thank-you for all the extra hours you put in tohelp her finish a major product. You got to pet three dogs. You were even ableto make progress in your language lesson.

It had been a good day.

‘And it’s about to get better,’ you had thought as you madeyour way down one of the tunnels the turtles used when they were going topside.You had been so excited to see your boyfriend.

Mikey is everything you could ever want. He brought youbalance, helped you find and maintain a peace in yourself that you hadn’trealized was missing until he came along. He was adventure where you werecaution. He was vibrant where you were subtle. He was affectionate where youwere reserved. He kept you secure, in yourself and in your life and never madefun of you for the way you experienced the world.

He is the golden glow that scatters over the city as the sunsets, bouncing off the high windows and reflecting off the glass. You had neverthought you’d be loved so intensely by another person before him.

At least, you had thought he loved you.

Now, you weren’t so sure.

Not after this.

Not after you had heard him say that he desired April. Thathe’d drop to her feet and serenade her on her obvious beauty, her wit, herlaugh and her smile. That his dramatic declarations of affection extended toher in a room you had thought was only for you and him.

But he wouldn’t.

Because he had you.

And he wouldn’t do that to you.

Lurking just behind the entry way, you felt your body breakdown and put itself together again. Cells combusted and reformed. Synapsesfired in all different directions, unsure of what to process and where to sendwhat. Pink turned to purple turned to grey. Shaky legs managed to keep youupright but only just.

Fuck.

It had been too good to be true.

Tears slipped out without meaning to. You quickly wiped themaway and breathed, contemplating turning around and walking away beforediscarding that idea. They were expecting you. They would come looking for youif you didn’t show up, expecting the worst.

You’d have to tell him what you heard. You’d have to hear itagain but this time, it would be to your face.

A coldness blanketed you like anill-fitting suit. A new skin molded from copper and stitched with the smell ofsulfur. A safety net to catch all the little broken pieces of yourself as youchip and crack under the pressure.  

You took another deep breath and walked into the lair,greeting everyone with a big smile stretched painfully across your cheeks. Yourstomach lurched. It felt wrong.

“Baby! You’re here!” Mikey exclaimed, leaping over furniturewith his usual brand of puppy-like excitement. Normally, you’d be flattered athis attentions, the way that he disregards obstacles in his path to get to you.No one had ever been that excited to see you before.

But you weren’t this time. It felt like an exaggeration, anovercompensation. It smelt like sickness.

When he reached you, you let him pull you close and kissyou.

It tasted like a lie, black and gritty. Bile gathered in theback of your throat and you swallowed to keep it down as he pulled away,concern written in the furrow of his brow.

“You okay angel? Something the matter?” he asked softly,stepping away to rub his hands down your arms before pulling you close again.He pressed his beak to the side of your face, leaving little pecking kisses ashe did. Despite the close proximity, his warmth felt distant, a ghost of atouch on your skin.

“I just had a rough day Mikey,” you muttered back, givinghim a small smile. You pulled his face away from yours, reaching a hand tostroke the scaled skin of his cheek, lips quirking as he nuzzled into yourtouch. He still smelt like summer and electricity and you were relieved thatsomething remained the same. “I’ll be okay.”

He never pushed when you didn’t want to talk and you weregrateful for it. He knew that you needed to process things bit by bit beforeyou could talk about them, especially if they were stressful oroverwhelming.  

“Anything we can do to help?” Leo asked, his voice silver,like moonlight that bounces off water in the dark.

You shook your head no, “It was just a bad day. Happens tous all. I’ll be fine. It wasn’t all bad. I met someone with beautiful colorstoday.”

“Is that so Angelcakes?” Mikey asked, a playful grin on hisface as he picked you up, “Were the colors prettier than mine?” He nuzzled hisface into your neck, a big smile on his face as you looped your legs around himas much as you could.

“Um…”

Raph snorted from his perch on the couch, “Don’t ask herthat. She doesn’t have the heart to tell you your colors are ugly as shit.”

Mikey gasped dramatically, clutching you further to hischest, “You take that back! My colors are beautiful. You’re just mad cuz yourtexture is puke! Isn’t that right baby? Raph is the texture of puke and smellof crusty unwashed ball sacs.”

An argument about colors and numbers and textures ensuedbetween the brothers, Leo and Donnie joining in when attempts to stop it wheremet with mean comments about their own visual representations, giving you areprieve from their concerned stares. You climbed off Mikey while he wasotherwise distracted and sat next to Splinter on his meditation mat, foldingyour legs under you.

“Are you alright my dear?” Splinter whispered, eyes focusedon his sons. His hand grasped one of yours, giving it a little squeeze and yourealized two things. Splinter had been paying attention to his sons’conversation and he knew your ‘bad day’ had everything to do with it.

“Not really Master Splinter.” Lips twitched into a sadlittle grin as you squeezed his hand back. “Not right now.”

Before he could say anything else, you were ripped off themat and back into strong green arms, pressed flat against a wide, muscledplastron. Mikey’s face beamed down at you, the tang on your tongue gettingstronger the longer you looked at him.

“Tell them angel. Tell them my colors are beautiful,” he breathed,all golden light and reflective shimmer and the breaths right before you blowon a dandelion.

You swallowed thickly, voice dropping to a whisper “Yeah.I’ve never seen anything more beautiful.”

If circumstances were different, you would have believedthat he had actually swooned, knees locking to keep you both upright. Youwould have believed the sheer force of emotion that appeared on his face wasreal and that he loved you the way you loved him. You would have believed thatnothing could ever be wrong between you and him, that you had found the love ofyour life.  

But you didn’t.

“Oh come on! Of course she’s gonna say that. She loves ya!”Raph argued, hands thrown up in your direction, “I want a new judge!”

Another argument broke out but instead of letting you go,Mikey kept you close so you laid your head on his shoulder, closedyour eyes, and counted down the minutes until you could go home.

—–

You didn’t know what to do so you stayed late at your office everynight under the guise of being overloaded at work to figure it out.  You knew you were feeling insecure, lumpy andchunky and off-white, and you knew you could bring it up and actually talk toMikey about it and he would understand.

But you also couldn’t. You didn’t want to break up with him.He was the only one who didn’t think you were weird when you said musicsometimes felt like there were guitars strings tied on your spine and someone’splaying them, the melodies vibrating through every bone in your body. Or whenyou said Raph’s laughter smelt like cinnamon. Or when you baked lemon squaresbecause Donnie asked you to describe his voice.

You didn’t want to break up but you couldn’t visualize aconversation that didn’t end up in a break-up.

You didn’t want to lose him but you had to considerthat….maybe it was inevitable.

Maybe he wasn’t yours anymore.

Maybe, the deep dark purple part of you whispered, he wasn’teven yours to begin with. Who’s to say that you were the one he picked insteadof just being the one who said yes.

The razor sharp tang was heavy on your tongue.

———–

April took you out for coffee the Saturday morning afteryour week long escape. Despite the circumstances, she was one of your favoritepeople, all vanilla scented lipgloss and pink silk with flashes of lighteningbugs behind it. Incredibly beautiful to look at and be around.

You couldn’t hate her.

“So, how are things? I haven’t seen you in a week,” shesaid, smile sweet as she poked her straw through her latte. She was dressed inher signature yellow jacket and a basic tank top with her hair up in a messybun but still somehow looked put together. She was always put together.

You recalled wearing a similar outfit a few days ago.Shopping was something you and April liked to do together because your styleswere similar. You liked a lot of the same things, especially when it came tofabric textures, so the two of you often went perusing in the other’s closetwhen looking to put a new look together.

The dark purple part of you reminded you that she was theone Mikey really loved, that he asked you out because you dressed similar,walked similar, had similar interests, did similar things in your free time.Always similar. Not quite but good enough.

“Pretty good,” you responded, only a partial lie, “I love my job. The people are great. The clients are great. I’m never bored. It’sfantastic.”

“Good. I’m glad. You deserve to have a good workplace,” shetook a sip of her latte, “Mikey mentioned that you had a bad day last week butyou didn’t say what it was about. Are you ok?”

You took a sip of your own drink, a new holiday drink thecoffee shop was promoting and immediately decided it tasted too puce for yourliking.

“Yeah. I was just overwhelmed. I had met a lot of new peopleand it was bit overwhelming,” you shrugged, hoping that your lie wasbelievable. You gestured to your outfit, an old sweatpants and hoodie, “I may notlook it but I feel better.”

She nodded sympathetically, smile widening, and you couldsee how Mikey fell in love with her, “Well, I’m glad you feel better. Does thatmean you’re coming to movie night tonight?”

Fuck.

You forgot about movie night.

“Of course I am.”

Double fuck.

“Great! Mikey will be so excited. He misses you so much.”

“I miss him too.”

——-

April was already at the lair when you dropped in, some oddnumber of hours later, arriving a tad too late for it to be normal. April hadwalked you back to your apartment before heading to work after coffee, ramblingabout what had happened that week as far as Foot activity and crimes thathappened in the area while you thought about what to do about this entiresituation.

You had changed quickly into an over-sized shirt and adifferent pair of sweatpants, not really bothering to put an outfit together.There was no reason for you to put an effort into looking nice. You didn’t wantto look like April.

Distance. You needed to put a tangible, aesthetic distancebetween you and April. No wearing the same clothes. No styling the same way. Nodoing makeup like she does. No connection between you and her.

You weren’t surprised to see Mikey wrapped up inconversation with her, sitting as close as he does when he sits with you,breathing her air the same way he breathes yours but it still fucking hurt.

He looked so happy to be in her space, loud and boisterousand excited.

You knew what you had to do.

“Hey Mikey,” you whispered, trying to catch his attentionwithout seeming too rude for interrupting, “Can I talk to you for a sec?”  

“Baby! When did youget here? You’re late! Why are you late? You’re never late! Are you ok? Did youget hurt on the way here? Was it Foot ninja? Cuz I thought we cleared them outof the area but if not and they hurt you, they’re gonna pay. I swear angelcakes–“ you cut him off, the influx of questions causing your chest to tighten.

“Too much Mikey.”

His mouth snapped shut and he pulled you out of the room asyou ran through one of your breathing exercises, muttering the colors in theFibonacci sequence. He was watching you closely, his stupidly blue eyes floodedwith regret and locked on your face as you made your way through the firstfifteen numbers.

“I’m sorry honey,” he mouthed as you slowed in yourcounting, breathing a bit easier and steady.

Calmer, you met his gaze and for a moment, you thought aboutthe world you experienced with him. All the new colors and sensations andtextures. The things you had never felt before and how they explodedbeautifully inside you. You had never known that love tasted like coconut orthe sensation of looking forward to seeing someone was a splattering of rainbowcolors across a white background.

“What’s up baby? What’s wrong?”

You wondered if you’d ever experience those things again.

“Its over Mikey.”

The words tasted grey, shadows over paper.

——

There you have it. Angst. Poorly written angst. I’m sorry. 

Also let me know what you thought of the reader I used. 

[psychicnightparadise]

Shankhapushpi

Shankhpushpi, clad by the vernacular names Shankhini, Kambumalini, Samkhapushpi, Sadaphuli, and Sankhaphuli is an intense memory sponsor and mind tonic that effectively attempts to further develop knowledge and working of the cerebrum. The name shankhpushpi was given to the plant attributable to its shankh or conch formed blossoms. It likewise helps in upgrading fixation, learning capacities, mental exhaustion, sleep deprivation, stress, tension, gloom, and so on Additionally Read: Sage: 5 Stunning Health Benefits Of The Memory Boosting Herb

shankhpushpi blossom

What is Shankhpushpi?

Shankhpushpi, which passes by the herbal name Convolvulus pluricaulis is a lasting plant local to India. Notable as morning-wonder, speed wheel or Aloe weed in English, this restorative spice has explicit pointed stone molded leaves and bulb-formed blue or white blossoms. The spice is very helpful and is utilized from root to tips for its wide scope of restorative advantages.

The comprehensive study of ayurveda advocates shankhpushpi in different rasayanas or details and sacred texts by the Sanskrit names Shyamakranta, Visnukranta, Vaishnava, Sankhaholi, Vishnugandhi, Vishnukranti, Shankavall, Vishnukrantha, Krishnaenkranti, Nilashankhapushpi, Ksheerpushpi, Laghuvishnukranta, Erravishnukaraantha.

The host of properties including Medhya (memory sponsor), Vamana (Vomiting), Deepana (upgrades stomach discharge), Pachana (helps in absorption), Rochana (animates hunger), Kusthahara (treats skin illness), Shothahara (lessens aggravation), Hridaya (treats heart issues), Jantujit (alleviates from worm pervasion) makes this otherworldly spice a strong arrangement of umpteen medical issues.

Impact On Doshas

Shankhpushpi portrays Tikta Rasa (unpleasant taste). It shows Snigdha (slick, tacky) and Pichhil (vile) gunas, Sheeto Virya (cold intensity) and Madhura Vipaka (sharp metabolic property). It appeases Tridoshas, for example the Pitta (fire and air), Vata (air) and Kapha (earth and water) doshas and works more on Vata and Pitta doshas. Additionally Read: Introduction To Ayurveda: Learn About Vata, Pitta And Kapha Doshas

Known as Mangalyakushuma in Sanskrit which implies carrier of favorable luck and wellbeing, every single piece of this smooth white bloomed plant is incredibly advantageous for treating a large group of sicknesses and working on the life span of life.

Phytochemical Constituents

The mysterious natural cure overall contains a bunch of dynamic constituents including alkaloids like shankhapushpine, convolvuline, convolidine, convolvine, convolamine, convoline, confoline, convozine. Other than these, it additionally contains unstable oils, unsaturated fats, greasy alcohols, hydrocarbons, palmitic acids, linoleic acids, myristic acids, flavonoids, steroids-phytosterols, D-glucose, maltose, sucrose, starch, rhamnose, and different sugars, proteins, and amino acids.

shankhpushpi medical advantages

Medical advantages Of Shankhapushpi

Works on Cognitive Functioning:

Shankhpushpi is a customary solution for expanding the working of the cerebrum. The incredible cell reinforcements and flavonoids present in it further develop the memory limit, center, fixation, serenity, readiness of a person. Being a mind tonic and trigger, individuals taking shankhpushpi have further developed memory, thinking, critical thinking, and other psychological capacities. The neuroprotective components in the plant forestall loss of memory and diminish pressure from the mind.

Diminishes Mental Fatigue:

Mental exhaustion is a state of inordinate and delayed psychological action. It generally happens because of inordinate work utilizing a PC, sitting in front of the TV for quite a long time, learning or remembering exercises, and so on and makes an individual lose focus and feel torpid. Shankhpushpi is an amazing memory promoter that aides in upgrading the cerebrum's functioning limit and decrease the deficiency of fixation.

Admission of a decoction of a spoonful of shankhpushpi powder with a glass of water consistently can do ponders in boosting your memory.

Shankhpushpi for Depression

Shankhapushpi holds high importance because of its intense enemy of stress, hostile to burdensome and against nervousness properties are amazingly valuable for treating various kinds of insane issues like despondency, dementia, fretfulness, and so forth It adjusts the cerebrum synthetics for example synapses and ups the discharge of dopamine which thus monitors the serotonin level and assists with diminishing different indications of tension which incorporates anxiety, disquiet, cold hands, and feet, and helps in loosening up the psyche and body.

Upgrades Cardiac Functioning:

Shankhpushpi is incredibly compelling in treating different heart sicknesses because of its solid antioxidative nature. It reinforces the heart muscles and forestalls lipid develop in the veins. The bioactive constituents like the ethanolic extricate lessen the degrees of non-esterified unsaturated fats for example NEFA, and henceforth lessens the danger of respiratory failures, heart blocks, blood clumps, and so on It additionally assumes a vital part in bringing down the degrees of cholesterol in the blood.

Invigorates Digestion:

The stomach related properties found in this conventional spice is observed to be very helpful in further developing assimilation. It invigorates the emission of stomach related squeezes consequently expanding the ingestion of fundamental supplements and improving assimilation. It likewise forestalls liquid maintenance and treats manifestations of stomach torment, stomach distension, ulcerative colitis, and peevish gut condition.

shankhpushpi for skin

Expands Skin Health:

Shankhpushpi assumes a critical part in treating different skin diseases. The plenitude of cancer prevention agents in the powerful spice is extremely successful in eliminating unsafe free revolutionaries from the body and its antipruritic nature reduces tingling sensation caused because of hypersensitive conditions like psoriasis, skin inflammation, skin inflammation, burn from the sun and so on It additionally goes about as a skin tonic, infiltrates profound into the skin, sustains it from the inside and bestows a brilliant and solid sparkle. Aside from this, antioxidative nature additionally treats the different indications of maturing like wrinkles, scarce differences, dull spots, and so on

Apply a combination of a tablespoon of shankhpushpi powder with nectar and rose water all over consistently, to decrease spots and scarcely discernible differences and accomplish a more youthful restored brilliant skin.

Forestalls Headache:

Shankhpushpi holds high importance in giving help from persistent migraines, strain, and so forth Regularly, migraine happens because of unreasonable responsibility, stress, tension, and so forth It has an alleviates disturbed nerves, quiets the mind and further develops nerve work. Additionally Read: Five Common Types Of Headaches: Causes, Symptoms And Treatment

Kneading the temple with shankhpushpi oil assists with diminishing migraines and give a mitigating and cooling impact.

What Is Shankhpushpi Good For?

Shankhpushpi for Insomnia

Shankhpushpi decreases the degrees of cortisol which is a pressure chemical and accordingly constricts pressure and works on the quality, length and gives a serene rest.

Drinking a spoonful of shankhpushpi powder blended in a glass of milk and Jeera, prior to resting is profoundly compelling in managing body digestion, prompting rest and treating rest problems like sleep deprivation. Likewise Read: Types of Insomnia: Here's What You Should Do To Sleep

Shankhpushpi for Anorexia Nervosa

Anorexia nervosa is a dietary problem wherein an individual experiences self-starvation. It is likewise appended to psychological well-being as the individual experiences low weight issues, dread of putting on weight, lower confidence and an extreme longing to lessen weight. The individual additionally has a deficiency of craving or want to eat any food. Shankhpushpi is a characteristic starter and helps in the processing of food, further develops craving and assists the individual with eating.

Shankhpushpi for Infections

A few investigations show that Shankhpushpi has strong enemy of bacterial properties that are broadly utilized for eliminating microbes from the body. The bioactive mixtures present in this conventional spice forestalls worm invasion as well as treats wounds and works on mending.

Shankhpushpi for Hypertension

The dynamic parts in shankhpushpi make it a proper solution for individuals experiencing hypertension or hypertension. It forestalls the corridors from solidifying for example atherosclerosis, in this manner diminishing strokes and forestalling heart illnesses. Shankhpushpi functions as an astounding normal solution for hypertension treatment.

Shankhpushpi for Ulcers

The glycoprotein emissions of the spice have been discovered in different examinations to be amazingly powerful in treating various kinds of stomach ulcer including peptic and ulcerative colitis.

Shankhpushpi for Neural Diseases

This memory-boosting spice is a mysterious solution for a large group of insane illnesses like epilepsy, dementia, Alzheimer's as it forestalls the obliteration of neurons and works on psychological working. Likewise Read: World Alzheimer's Day: Try These Nutritious Smoothies To Enhance Brain Function

Shankhpushpi For Pregnancy

This spice is viewed as safe for pregnant ladies as it successfully reinforces the uterus and forestalls premature deliveries. Counsel your primary care physician on utilizing a combination of shankhpushpi and ashwagandha churna for a course of 3 to 4 months if there should arise an occurrence of successive unnatural birth cycles.

shankhpushpi tonic

Shankhpushpi Formulations

Shankhapushpi is generally accessible in the market in different structures like tablets or cases known as gutikas, powder or churna, juice or kashayam, syrup or arishtam, oil or tailam. Be that as it may, for the most part it is utilized as syrup.

Shankhpushpi Syrup

Fixings (per 10 ml)

Shankhpushpi (Convolvulus pluricaulis) 200 mg

Brahmi (Bacopa monnieri) 50 mg

Sugar (Sarkara) 8000 mg

Citrus extract (Nimbu swaras) 6 mg

The signs of shankhpushpi syrup are simply equivalent to that of the actual spice.

Measurements Of The Various Shankhpushpi Formulations

[digitalyogesh]

Shankhapushpi

Shankhpushpi, clad by the vernacular names Shankhini, Kambumalini, Samkhapushpi, Sadaphuli, and Sankhaphuli is an intense memory supporter and cerebrum tonic that effectively attempts to further develop knowledge and working of the mind. The name shankhpushpi was given to the plant inferable from its shankh or conch formed blossoms. It additionally helps in improving fixation, learning capacities, mental exhaustion, sleep deprivation, stress, uneasiness, wretchedness, and so forth Additionally Read: Sage: 5 Stunning Health Benefits Of The Memory Boosting Herb

Shankhpushpi bloom

What is Shankhpushpi?

Shankhpushpi , which passes by the plant name Convolvulus pluricaulis is a lasting plant local to India. Notable as morning-brilliance, speed wheel or Aloe weed in English, this therapeutic spice has explicit sharpened stone molded leaves and bulb-formed blue or white blossoms. The spice is incredibly useful and is utilized from root to tips for its wide scope of helpful advantages.

The all encompassing study of ayurveda promotes shankhpushpi in different rasayanas or details and sacred writings by the Sanskrit names Shyamakranta, Visnukranta, Vaishnava, Sankhaholi, Vishnugandhi, Vishnukranti, Shankavall, Vishnukrantha, Krishnaenkranti, Nilashankhapushpi, Ksheerpushpi, Laghuvishnukranta, Erravishnukaraantha.

The host of properties including Medhya (memory promoter), Vamana (Vomiting), Deepana (improves stomach discharge), Pachana (helps in absorption), Rochana (animates hunger), Kusthahara (treats skin sickness), Shothahara (lessens aggravation), Hridaya (treats heart issues), Jantujit (eases from worm invasion) makes this supernatural spice a strong arrangement of umpteen medical conditions.

Impact On Doshas

Shankhpushpi describes Tikta Rasa (unpleasant taste). It shows Snigdha (slick, tacky) and Pichhil (vile) gunas, Sheeto Virya (cold strength) and Madhura Vipaka (impactful metabolic property). It mollifies Tridoshas, for example the Pitta (fire and air), Vata (air) and Kapha (earth and water) doshas and works more on Vata and Pitta doshas. Additionally Read: Introduction To Ayurveda: Learn About Vata, Pitta And Kapha Doshas

Known as Mangalyakushuma in Sanskrit which implies carrier of favorable luck and wellbeing, every single piece of this smooth white blossomed plant is amazingly valuable for treating a large group of illnesses and working on the life span of life.

Phytochemical Constituents

The mysterious natural cure overall contains a horde of dynamic constituents including alkaloids like shankhapushpine, convolvuline, convolidine, convolvine, convolamine, convoline, confoline, convozine. Other than these, it likewise contains unpredictable oils, unsaturated fats, greasy alcohols, hydrocarbons, palmitic acids, linoleic acids, myristic acids, flavonoids, steroids-phytosterols, D-glucose, maltose, sucrose, starch, rhamnose, and different carbs, proteins, and amino acids.

shankhpushpi medical advantages

Medical advantages Of Shankhpushpi

Works on Cognitive Functioning:

Shankhpushpi is a conventional solution for expanding the working of the cerebrum. The incredible cancer prevention agents and flavonoids present in it further develop the memory limit, center, fixation, smoothness, readiness of a person. Being a cerebrum tonic and trigger, individuals taking shankhpushpi have further developed memory, thinking, critical thinking, and other psychological capacities. The neuroprotective components in the plant forestall loss of memory and diminish strain from the mind.

Lessens Mental Fatigue:

Mental weakness is a state of exorbitant and delayed intellectual movement. It generally happens because of exorbitant work utilizing a PC, sitting in front of the TV for quite a long time, learning or remembering exercises, and so on and makes an individual lose focus and feel lazy. Shankhpushpi is an incredible memory supporter that aides in improving the cerebrum’s functioning limit and lessen the deficiency of fixation.

Admission of a decoction of a spoonful of shankhpushpi powder with a glass of water consistently can do ponders in boosting your memory.

Shankhpushpi for Depression

Shankhapushpi holds high importance because of its powerful enemy of stress, against burdensome and hostile to uneasiness properties are incredibly helpful for dealing with various sorts of insane issues like melancholy, dementia, anxiety, and so forth It adjusts the cerebrum synthetic compounds for example synapses and ups the emission of dopamine which thus monitors the serotonin level and assists with decreasing different manifestations of nervousness which incorporates fretfulness, anxiety, cold hands, and feet, and helps in loosening up the brain and body.

Improves Cardiac Functioning:

Shankhpushpi is very compelling in treating different heart illnesses because of its solid antioxidative nature. It fortifies the heart muscles and forestalls lipid develop in the veins. The bioactive constituents like the ethanolic remove diminish the degrees of non-esterified unsaturated fats for example NEFA, and thus decreases the danger of coronary failures, heart blocks, blood clusters, and so forth It’s anything but a vital job in bringing down the degrees of cholesterol in the blood.

Animates Digestion:

The stomach related properties found in this conventional spice is discovered to be amazingly gainful in further developing assimilation. It animates the emission of stomach related squeezes in this way expanding the retention of fundamental supplements and improving assimilation. It likewise forestalls liquid maintenance and treats side effects of stomach torment, stomach distension, ulcerative colitis, and peevish inside disorder.

Shankhpushpi for skin

Increases Skin Health:

Shankhpushpi assumes a critical part in treating different skin diseases. The plenitude of cancer prevention agents in the strong spice is extremely successful in eliminating destructive free revolutionaries from the body and its antipruritic nature lightens tingling sensation caused because of hypersensitive conditions like psoriasis, dermatitis, skin break out, burn from the sun and so forth It likewise goes about as a skin tonic, enters profound into the skin, feeds it from the inside and gives a brilliant and solid shine. Aside from this, antioxidative nature likewise deals with the different indications of maturing like wrinkles, almost negligible differences, dull spots, and so on

Apply a combination of a tablespoon of shankhpushpi powder with nectar and rose water all over consistently, to decrease spots and barely recognizable differences and accomplish a more youthful revived brilliant skin.

Forestalls Headache:

Shankhpushpi holds high importance in giving help from constant cerebral pains, pressure, and so forth Typically, cerebral pain happens because of inordinate responsibility, stress, nervousness, and so forth It has a relieves disturbed nerves, quiets the cerebrum and further develops nerve work. Likewise Read: Five Common Types Of Headaches: Causes, Symptoms And Treatment

Rubbing the brow with shankhpushpi oil assists with calming migraines and give a relieving and cooling impact.

What Is Shankhpushpi Good For?

Shankhpushpi for Insomnia

Shankhpushpi decreases the degrees of cortisol which is a pressure chemical and consequently lessens pressure and works on the quality, span and gives a quiet rest.

Drinking a spoonful of shankhpushpi powder blended in a glass of milk and Jeera, prior to resting is profoundly successful in controlling body digestion, instigating rest and treating rest issues like a sleeping disorder. Additionally Read: Types of Insomnia: Here’s What You Should Do To Sleep

Shankhpushpi for Anorexia Nervosa

Anorexia nervosa is a dietary problem where an individual experiences self-starvation. It is additionally joined to psychological well-being as the individual experiences low weight issues, dread of putting on weight, lower confidence and a serious craving to diminish weight. The individual likewise has a deficiency of yearning or want to eat any food. Shankhpushpi is a characteristic hors d’oeuvre and helps in the absorption of food, further develops hunger and assists the individual with eating.

Shankhpushpi for Infections

A few investigations show that Shankhpushpi has powerful enemy of bacterial properties that are widely utilized for eliminating microorganisms from the body. The bioactive mixtures present in this conventional spice forestalls worm invasion as well as treats wounds and works on recuperating.

Shankhpushpi for Hypertension

The dynamic segments in shankhpushpi make it a fitting solution for individuals experiencing hypertension or hypertension. It keeps the corridors from solidifying for example atherosclerosis, accordingly decreasing strokes and forestalling heart afflictions. Shankhpushpi functions as a stunning normal solution for hypertension treatment.

Shankhpushpi for Ulcers

The glycoprotein emissions of the spice have been discovered in different examinations to be amazingly viable in treating various kinds of stomach ulcer including peptic and ulcerative colitis.

Shankhpushpi for Neural Diseases

This memory-boosting spice is a supernatural solution for a large group of crazy illnesses like epilepsy, dementia, Alzheimer’s as it forestalls the obliteration of neurons and works on psychological working. Additionally Read: World Alzheimer’s Day: Try These Nutritious Smoothies To Enhance Brain Function

Shankhpushpi is a customary home grown cure favored with umpteen medical advantages. It holds high importance in further developing the memory limit, upgrading fixation, learning abilities, and treating mental weariness, sleep deprivation, tension, gloom, and so forth The broad medical advantages of the different spices utilized in this detailing additionally increment its remedial viability in treating fruitlessness issues. Whenever taken in the legitimate measurement, one can avoid the incidental effects and appreciate the endless medical advantages.

[galacticlee]

The Entertainment Conflicts

 These prompts made me cry they're amazing holy quiznack

For some reason, Tumblr decided to delete this ask, but here are your shidge ficlets, @rebelgirlmatrix1213

1)Soft!Shidge + music = my heart attack waiting to happen

And for 2) I got into Stranger Things only a few weeks ago, and I know for a fact they would love it. Besides, couples fighting over TV shows is the best, so why not.

Prompt from this post (x)

1)

It was all started when Pidge snooped through his playlist one night before dinner.

Music was a welcomed privilege to have, and the Paladins hadn't realized the quietness of the void of space until it had departed them. Thus, once the five returned to their home planet, melodies were blasted through out their cars, homes, and whatever hang-outs they attended, the unmistakable urge to jump up and wildly dance as if no one was watching stronger than ever. Each earthling had their genre of tunes that they preferred; Keith loved old rock music, Hunk a fan of classical, and etcetera. The tunes that would exhale from the local stations were a blend of 'southern' and whatever their parents would listen to, the satellite edition blasting heavy-beated pop that would threaten to break a car's speakers or Broadway show tunes that no one in the universe could ever get quite right. It took him a while, but the Black Paladin finally found his comfort songs.

Shiro rocked out to whatever his tiny girlfriend would, thus the songs that would echo throughout the walls of their home vastly consisted of indie rock and whatever slow, electronic beats she felt fit the pair's collective emotion. The genre grew on him, creating a soft spot in his mind for anything that reminded him of Pidge. His now vast collection of memories with her included the pair with ear buds stretched between them, whether it be in bed, walking across busy city sidewalks, or huddled together on a crowded tram. Dancing together in their kitchen, or bedroom, or shower was a common event, socks or bare feet sliding and squirming across the tile or wood floor with ladles or hairbrushes or hands used as would-be microphones. Music was the warmth of her figure next to him in the early gold morning, the cooling touch of her fingers trailing across the back of his neck amidst steaming water, and the soft melody of her voice dancing from her lab as she worked on some intergalactic project. Anything that reminded him of her, especially a band or artist, helped his day go by.

Thus, as he explored her playlist, he began to grow a love for Lindsey Stirling.

He expected to be made fun of, as was the norm when either of the couple found a new, freaking-out-about thing to get behind. The teasing was always loose, always comfortable, but he couldn't quite put his metallic finger on why he kept the artist tucked in his pocket. Yet, he did, humming the tunes of the songs he could remember and sneaking his favorites into her phone.

But he could never hide anything from the intelligent Holt.

"Soooooo," She started, leaning over the kitchen counter with her feet kicking in the air, thumbs pressing against his phone's screen. Her smile was audible through her words, though he couldn't decipher if it was coy, sympathetic, or incredulous. "I see you have a favorite electric violinist."

He near dropped the spatula he was holding, mouth drawing together into a thin line and hand around a saucepan tightening whilst his face began to sting. Shiro stirred its contents faster, a tad bit nervously. "Hmm, what about it?"

He braced himself for the incoming roll of the honey-shaded eyes, or the awful violin impression, but they never seemed to arrive. Shiro glanced up from the pan, throwing his eyes over his shoulder and toward her. She wiggled in place, smile wide as she swung her legs back and forth against the cabinet and phone pressed in her lap. She fiddled with the sink's taps, choosing her next words with a pursed lip.

"Master of Tides or Crystalize?"

"What?"

"Master of Tides, then."

 He narrowed his eyes, blinking as he ceased the stirring and reprocessed the statement. Pidge's freckled features were glowing, intelligent grin shining at her partner as she squirmed off the marble slab and neared him. Fingers pressed against the screen of his phone, her steps became bouncy, shoulders moving back and forth as a rhythm began to exit its speakers. He instantly recognized the noise, the thump of a beat fading out of the device and into his ears.

"No teasing?" He questioned, dropping the hand from the dish as she snatched onto it and twirled it around her.

Pidge shrugged, stuffing the phone in her pocket after transferring it to the speakers hidden around the home. "I may or may not have an obsession with her as well," She admitted, caramel freckles flushed as Katie unrolled his arm. "And I might know most of them by heart."

"Might?" The food was now forgotten, utensil set on an unoccupied burner as she grabbed his other hand, the melody that bled through the hidden speakers she installed for God knows why picking up its pace. The tune was familiar to him and appeared to be with her as they slinked across the kitchen floor, feet turning and hands clenched around each other's. She rose on her tip-toes, moving an arm to position on his broad shoulders.

"Oh, so we're really dancing now?"

"You call this dancing?"

He grinned as they moved, raising his metallic limb as she twirled underneath it, giving a snort and a roll of her energetic eyes in response. The song was faster, livelier as the pair's pace increased, knee and ankle-high socks sliding across frigid tile and arms dropped when dancing became more of a flail-your-arms-to-the-tune-and-feel-good sort of feat. They spun and waved and tossed and turned, grins breaking into uncontrollable laughter as the pace of the song hurried and slowed, on and on again. By the end of the song, both were wheezing from chuckling, Pidge's hands pressed to Shiro's cheeks and his upon her wrists as the electric instruments washed away, leaving an out-of-breath couple and a steady beat that was soon to past.

He was glad she snooped through his phone.

2)

"Jancy will never top Mileven, Shiro, how dare you!" She shouted, pointing a finger toward him as she stretched away from him, digging her feet into the sofa's cushion. Shiro's face furrowed back at her as he leaned over, near spilling the contents of the bowl that lay in his lap.

"Jonathon and Nancy will always be the best paring in the show, Pidge." Shiro's voice was firm, and his steel grey eyes burned in the back of her head, but she stuck to her argument as she climbed back and thrust her fist into the sweetened kettle corn, stuffing her face full of it and resting her feet on his arm while awaiting him to continue. "Even the insane conspiracy theorist said that they belong together, and even Steve and the jocks though they were dating in Season One. So the Jancy plot is stronger than the Mileven."

She waited until he made a move for the corn to retaliate with her . "Sure, but think about it. Eleven and Mike are part of the main five or six that are the core of the series. Name a more iconic duo than them."

Shiro raised an eyebrow. "Alright. Batman and Robin. Spiderman and Deadpool. Coran and his moustache is also-"

She pursed her lips. "Coran is not an acceptable answer-"

"Should we even get on the Jopper subje-"

The two were interrupted by the screen in front of them thundering aggressively, the pair's heads swiveling to catch a glimpse of their collctive favorite show, Stranger Things. Pidge had come across the hit series while preparing to dive into the depths of Netflix one day, watched the first season, and promptly demanded her partner watch it alongside her. It was an instant hint, and both absorbed the irony of the government-hiding-secrets trope that they knew all too well about. And, as was the trouble of being a fan (or in this case, stan) and having your significant other be the same, it offered either pure happiness when you completely agree, or heated arguments in any other alternative.

For these two, it was indefinitely the latter.

Pidge squirmed closer to Shiro, tucking into his side as his arm fell instinctively over her shoulder. They sat in a few minuets of silence, watching as a group of kids biked down a road, only then speaking after the credits rolled and the 'Play next episode' button appeared. She turned her head to the side, strands of hair that fell out of her incredibly messy bun tickling the back of her neck as she spoke her following words with childish determination.

"We need to give Keith the Steve Harrington hair-cut."

Shiro exhaled a breathy laugh, shaking his head. "Do you think he would really allow us to style his hair, much less give him a style from the 80's?"

The brunette rolled her eyes as she reached for the kettle corn, nudging the collar of her (Shiro's. It was Shiro's, but it as hers) shirt back over her bare, pale shoulder. "He's had a mullet for, like, seven years at least, and a mullet is one of the things that defined the eighties! We might as well have the damn thing piled taller than his Lion," Pidge reasoned, throwing a hand out to emphasize her statement as the other reached for the snack-bowl. Her only response was another shake of the head and a gesture to play the next episode in addition to Shiro's head slowly dipping to the side and resting on her covered shoulder. The opening minuets finished, theme starting up with it's scarlet-outlined letters floating across the screen when Pidge grabbed his flesh hand, turning her head to whisper in his ear.

"Hey, Shiro."

"Hmm?"

"Do you think I could make us have Eleven's powers?" Her golden eyes glittered, mouth forming into a curious smirk as she watched all of the ideas of consequence fire off in Shiro's synapses. The bowl of kettle corn was trashed as both moved quickly, Pidge aiming to leap away but was pinned down to the sofa by her much bigger, much stronger boyfriend. She gave a slight pout, forcing herself to restrain her laughter in her throat. His eyes were narrowed, the white patch of hair falling in between their eyes as he shook his head.

"Bad Idea. Bad, bad idea." He answered, tapping his fingers against her wrists which he held to the sofa's arm rest. Her response was an exaggerated sigh and a roll of her eyes, though her grin broke though her poorly cobbled-together pout while her freckled cheeks folded up.

"We just watched an eleven year-old girl flip a van, though," She reasoned, wrapping her legs around his torso as she flung a hand out to the screen, lips pressed together as she attempted to illustrate the failing point. The episode they had watched seemingly hundreds of times was becoming white noise, conversation no longer about Pidge running off to her lab but about keeping each other's focus. As Shiro listened on, he realized what he would say in the next few seconds could very well get him kissed, or get him killed. "That could help us defend the universe!"

"Only the kind of person who puts Mileven at top priority would say that."

"Don't you start-"

[ouraidengray4]

The Life-Changing Surprises That Come From Not Drinking for a Year

Party girl meets the bright light of day. / Photograph courtesy of Pat Bourque

My name is Rachel, and I am not an alcoholic. (Hi, Rachel.) But I drank too much, so I decided to take a couple of weeks off. A couple of weeks came and went, and as I neared the end of a month, I still didn’t feel ready to jump back in. I was feeling better—my head felt clear, and I felt more in control than I had in a long time. So I decided to make it a full calendar year, just to see what would happen. Right now, I'm nine months in.

Most people go dry for a resolved month in January (kudos!), but the idea struck me, seemingly without warning, in early May of last year. My anxiety had started chewing away at random parts of my life over the last year or two, and everyday activities had started sending me straight into heart-slamming panic. So one afternoon, I was doing nothing more unusual than driving to PetSmart for cat food when I suddenly experienced crashing waves of anxiety, like a spaceship was going to zoom down at any moment and swoop me up. It shouldn’t be this terrifying to drive 20 minutes away from my house, I thought.

So I considered what, in my day-to-day life, I could change. Contributing to my anxiety that day was my hangover. I'd overdone it a little the night before, which had made me uncomfortable and physically ill, but more than that, it was interrupting my brain function. All those neurons and synapses were firing off fight and flight simultaneously, creating a mental cocktail for panic. In that moment, I realized there was no way to combat my anxiety without cutting out the booze in one hard line.

But my lifestyle was so steeped in cheap beer and sparkling gin and tonics that it was practically impossible to imagine fully separating myself from booze. See, my corporate career of nine years was in sales and marketing with one of those big, fat macro-breweries popular with hipsters, millennials, and celebrities who want to be seen drinking low-brow brew for a dose of street cred.

Jell-O shots, a.k.a. the stuff of nightmares.

"We’re all just functioning alcoholics," one red-faced boss said as we walked into a big stadium to negotiate a placement for the season. "Highly functioning alcoholics." His shirt looked like he paid someone to wrinkle it, and he'd wrapped electrical tape around most of his fingertips in a bid to prevent him from biting his cuticles and nails down any more than he already had. He looked puffy and untrustworthy.

When he said those words about us, I felt like I was being force-fed a half-dead rat.

"I’m not like you," I thought. And maybe I wasn’t. But the thought made it hard for me to just blithely go from happy hours to tastings to beer fests. In the beer biz, there was one irrefutable expectation, especially if you're among the rare women: You have to be able to hang.

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One morning, I met with a salesman to ride his route to try to sell his accounts on some new product we were pushing. He said he gets an early start, which I never do, so meeting him at a neighborhood bar in the morning was a stretch in every way. Still, it felt like a kind of adventure. Walking in, I realized that the bar was full from one end to the next—at 7 a.m. When a heavy glass tumbler full of Baltimore’s honey- and cinnamon-laced moonshine, which is called "Evil," came at me first thing with a clink, I thought, "Ugh," but tossed it straight down the hatch. It was just going to be one of those days.

Over the years, these days became less surprising and more and more common. Some salesmen lived this drink-all-day life every day, so it gave me a strange sense of perspective. I could separate my drinking, a whole cut above the rest, and think, "I’m still not like you." Comparatively, my relationship with alcohol was mild.

After I left the industry, I wish I could say I found greener or more holistic pastures, and at times I did, but I still drank. Drinking helps so much with everything from anxiety to stage fright… until it doesn’t. And when it isn’t helping, it’s one hell of a choker. But in the past nine months, I haven't had so much as a sip, drop, shot, or beer since the day I decided to try this on. The closest I’ve come is the odd dream here and there where, for some ungodly reason, I drink a warm, cheap beer out of a plastic cup, or an awful, fruity malt beverage—and immediately regret my actions. I wake up feeling so incredibly relieved that none of it actually happened.

So here are my key takeaways, just in case you’re like one of the many people I encounter whose curiosity about going sober for a time comes from thinking about calling it quits too.

No booze means no hangovers.

I didn’t realize how amazing never, ever getting a hangover would be. Yes, it's even better than the boozed-up confidence that encouraged me to wear that dress and dance at the soul night and talk to a boy. Not being hungover is gorgeous. The utter lack of hangover makes me feel like quitting drinking isn’t actually about cutting something out so much as putting something better in.

People aren’t really that scary.

OK, some people will always be scary, but without the social lube, the scary ones become apparent super quickly, and I can now move away from stranger danger like BAM instead of after half a dozen half-witted hangs in a dark bar, groping at intuition. Otherwise, people in grocery stores and audiences and meetings are just people instead of automatic heart attack prompters.

Sleep is amazing.

I get it now: Sleep is restful. My dreams are cray, but I had missed them so, so much. Pro tip: If I ever want a "sober drunk," I just stay up way past my bedtime and get all the delirious feels that come with a little sleep deprivation. It really works.

Your appreciation for basically everything develops.

I used to get antsy at concerts, and I couldn’t really appreciate a day at the museum, knowing there was a beer to be had at the bar after. "Portrait, portrait, war sucks, portrait, sculpture—got it! Let's go." My attention span for things I cared about was diminished, and so was my capacity to love. Love requires all kinds of stillness, genuine curiosity, and wonder, it turns out.

Your social life will experience ch-ch-ch-changes.

If I kept yammering on about all the amazing benefits of not drinking for a year, you might not believe me, and you’d be right: Some things aren’t easy. A number of my friendships revolved around partying—it’s just what we did and how we spent our time. So some of those connections didn’t hold up without the crutch. Alcohol can really rev up an argument for some people, but it can also cast a spell and make you think a connection is stronger than it is.

Damn, does the mirror become your friend.

In my experience, suddenly ceasing drinking means you’ll lose weight. Your face will look less tired. That stubborn belly fat ceases to be stubborn when you stop feeding it. IMO, you could exercise less and still look better if you quit drinking. But if you’re like me, you’ll end up exercising even more because you feel like it, because it feels good to be physically strong. Before, I often saw exercise as a way to balance alcohol's negative effects. Now it’s a simple matter of power.

My lifestyle was so steeped in cheap beer and sparkling gin and tonics that it was practically impossible to imagine fully separating myself from booze.

My life has been positively affected by quitting drinking in all of these ways and more. Most of all, putting down the bottle has helped me to build confidence, and I believe that a lack of confidence causes all kinds of trouble: It makes Sally anxious, and it makes Jon want to sabotage himself and others around him. It breeds dark, ungainly urges.

When you feel bad about yourself, chances are that negativity and doubt are gonna express themselves one way or another, and whether you throw yourself a pity party or use them to try to make someone else look bad, they’re going through you—making you age prematurely, that surly look on your face stick, your blood spoil. In short, it’s not a good look.

Drinking can ease insecurity and boost a kind of false confidence that starts unnecessary fires and leaves a trail of meanness that burrows a not-so-charming perma-link in your brain. And this kind of damage is not easily undone. If instead, in the clear light of day, you confront whatever monster is living in your head or your heart and telling you, "You aren’t good enough," you’ll be happier and have a more meaningful relationship with yourself and others.

In the end, I honestly can’t think of any good reason to drink anymore. The idea of the year off drinking was to change my behavior around, and relationship with, alcohol. I figured a year would be long enough to hold a variety of experiences—holidays, breakups, hopefully meeting the man of my dreams, rejections, sleepless nights, congratulations, throw-down fights—and that if I could manage all that without the hard stuff, I’d have a pretty good idea of who I really am, what I really want, and how to make it happen. And so far, it's working.

Rachel Anne Warren is a writer and wedding singer based in Baltimore, MD. Her debut memoir is about running away to join a circus when she was 19-years-old. Follow her on Twitter and Instagram.

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