#incorrect bungou stary dogs

[sleepinghellokitty]

Ranpo, looking at a huge pile of snacks: Man, Budapest is going to love this! Poe: Budapest? Ranpo: I named my stomach Budapest Ranpo: Because it's the capital of HUNGRY Poe, impressed: ...wow

[misslovasstuff]

Akutagawa: Seven years ago, Dazai-san told me that Santa wasn't real.

Akutagawa: Well jokes on him because I'm at the mall and guess who's fucking here.

[sleepinghellokitty]

Fukuchi: Where is Fyodor? Sigma: In the kitchen Fukuchi: Oh! He's finally eating! I'll leave him be then. *in the kitchen, Fyodor is not eating, but instead, making a lethal coke rocket with Nikolai and Bram* Nikolai: This is gonna be so epic! Fyodor: Please never use that word again Bram: Epic? Fyodor: Stop

[sleepinghellokitty]

Kunikida: WHOEVER TOOK MY NOTEBOOK I WILL GUT U AND USE YOU EYES AS BAIT TO CATCH CANNED SARDIENS- oh here it is Atsushi: Dazai: ...damn- Yosano: *cover dazai's mouth* Ranpo: Fukuzawa: Karl:

[sleepinghellokitty]

Dazai: With all due respect, which is none- Mori: No, no stop there

[sleepinghellokitty]

Ranpo: If it's shiny and fits in my pocket it's mine. I'm not sorry for your loss

[sleepinghellokitty]

Mushitaro: I can't get Ranpo out of his room, what do I do? Poe: Say something Mushitaro: What do you mean by 'something'? Poe: anything factually incorrect *later* Ranpo: YOU THINK NEPTUNE IS A STAR Poe:

[sleepinghellokitty]

Teruko: I have the sharpest memory. Name one time I forgot something! Tachihara: You forgot me, Tetcho, and Jouno in a 7/11 parking lot 2 weeks ago Teruko: I did that on purpose Fukuchi: Why? Teruko: In my defense, Tetcho was drinking a soy sauce, milk, and Nutella smoothie Jouno: I- Tetcho: It was g o o d Tachihara: Justified

[sleepinghellokitty]

Chuuya ADA Au

Kunikida: I hope you two have an explanation for this Chuuya: Actually, we have three Dazai: Pick your favorite

[sleepinghellokitty]

Atsushi: Hey Dazai, can I have some money for coke? I'll pay you back! Dazai: Sure, will ¥27133 work? [around 183 dollars] Atsushi: It's ¥152... [around 1 dollar] Dazai: Really? That's too cheap, who's the dealer? Atsushi: Coca Cola? Dazai: ...OH Atsushi: I'm telling Kunikida about this

[sleepinghellokitty]

Judge: Does the defendant have any requests? Dazai: The death penalty Judge: Sir, this is for a speeding ticket Dazai: Your honor. The. Death. Penalty. Judge: Legally- Fyodor: Just give it to him, damn Chuuya: PLEASE Kunikida, dazai's attorney: Your honor, if those two are begging for it, the law no longer matters

[sleepinghellokitty]

Ranpo, in a moment of weakness: See the thing about me is that even though I force the 'I don't care' mindset, even though I am the most sensitive person and secretly worry about everything Poe: I know. Ranpo: How? I've never opened up to anyone like this before! Poe: The amount of candy you consume is concerning enough to tell me so.

[sleepinghellokitty]

Dazai: Here one piping hot bowl of chazuke! Atsushi: *pushes bowl away* No thanks, I'm not hungry Ranpo: WHAAAAAAAAAAT Dazai: *kitchen utensils crash to the floor* WHAT *ADA rushes in* Junichiro: Did he just say he wasn't hungry?! Fukuzawa: Atsushi are you ok? Yosano, shoves thermometer in his mouth: He's ABVIOUSLY SICK! Kyouka: Have some of my boiled tofu. Kunikida: I'm changing your schedule, your day off is tomorrow. You need to rest more, brat! Kenji and the random cow that spawned in the office: Betty will make you feel better *Door crashes open* Chuuya: What's this about the kid not eating? Jeez, I KNEW YOU WERE WORKING HIM TOO HARD! Gin: *places medicine in front of him* From my brother Dazai, in Dark!Dazai mode: *cracks knuckles* alright atsushi, I need an exact sequence of what happened and when. Chuuya: *slides paper* Names. Now.

[sleepinghellokitty]

Ranpo: Road trips with friends are greater than anything, except food Mushitaro: We're literally on the run from the law Poe: Let him be the light in all darkness

[sleepinghellokitty]

Ranpo, in a high pitch voice: "Poe is a cinnamon roll" "Poe is a babygirl" "Poe is a little silly" Ranpo: POE TRIES TO KILL PEOPLE WITH BOOKS!

[sleepinghellokitty]

Chuuya: Say it. Dazai: Chuu... Chuu.. Chuuya: Go on. Dazai: vertically challenged bitch *smack* Chuuya: Cook him Kouyou: we don't eat people Chuuya: WE DO NOW!