#in tags or pm or whatever is fine!!! NO PRESSURE ALSO | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

gigglylover1 · 1 year ago

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Last update (under the cut): 9/11/2024 7:36 PM

The link to mah DeviantArt account :>

✨ Currently in me inbox: 1️⃣

Requests: 🟨 it is time to go back to school- (⁠╥⁠﹏⁠╥⁠) if there is too much then I will close the ask button

QnA: ✅ you can ask anything (except for anything nsfw-) it's fine (⁠◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍⁠)

Current hyperfixation: multi-fandoming- ;-;

Time zone: GMT +5

Others: analog /

Ok just start with the basics-:

- Name: H (nickname: Starfade)

- Age: this is an ageless minor blog!!

- birthday/birth date: September 30th 20##

- Nationality: Malaysia 🇲🇾<3

- Religion: Islam 🏳️🏴💖

- Sexuality: Straight / Acesexual (I haven't figure out yet but keep it halal)

- ambivert (leaning introvert)

- ABSOLUTELY SHY-

I am a minor here so any no-no things popping up here or anywhere, I get ✨traumatized✨.

Usually all my art is in DeviantArt, crazy but seriously everything in it is sfw.

Also- I am born as a Malaysian but English is my first language- so Malay basically is not even my main language- atleast I barely passed my Malay classes-

Here are the things I luv <3 :

- Tickling (sfw)

- Art

- manga/comics

- Memes

- Islam (Muslim)

- Lore / horror games (I eat lore :>)

- Gacha (all lunime games tbh-)

I really hate >:(

- NSFW

- Islamaphobic

- Racism

- Kink

- transphobic

- Haters

- copyrighters

- Israel supporters

- back biters / gossipers ( especially if it is onto me)

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DNI LIST!!:

(this should be easy to follow, it is not that hard, don't make me add more to the list, I really hate adding many boundaries)

- NSFW blogs (even if there is mostly sfw, it still contains NSFW, that includes people that tag tickles as fetishes or kinks, belly growling, inflammation thingy ig?, vore, etc)

- blogs with DNI ageless blogs (ahem read my age again)

- Islamophobic (do I need to explain?)

Thin Ice:

- 18+ blogs (I have a friend that is now a young adult which makes this an exception. I will allow 18+ to interact or follow me but I do not want y'all to be weird around me. My friends on the other hand can talk about tickles with me as long as it is not over my boundaries)

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ALL the fandoms I am in/have been-:

(the order does not matter- I am too lazy to reorganize every fandom based on when I started to hyperfixate-) (⁠•⁠ ⁠▽⁠ ⁠•⁠;⁠)

(the ones that I crossed out I want to leave or I already left the community)

- solarballs

- mrspherical

- human buddy

- fundamental paper education

- hazbin hotel

- Mr men show/ Mr men and little miss

- The Mandela Catalogue

- baldi's basics

- countryballs/countryhumans

- scp foundation

- man in the suit

- happy child (how do I freaking love it-)

- the BEST mom

- the boiled one phenomenon

- the Oddity Compendium

- doctor nowhere (all of his work impresses me the most-)

- omori

- wonderend

- bad parenting

- backrooms

- inanimate insanity

- battle for dream island / battle for BFDI / BFDIA / TPOT (object show)

- Friday night Funkin

- Vita Carnis

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Things that I am willing to take as a tickle request (SFW ONLY!):

- Your ocs

- fandom personas (prefer the ones I already know)

- fandom tickle [headcannons] (no proshippers or whatever similar)

The scenarios that I will not do:

- tickle torture

- tickling with s3xual intentions in it (that includes adult tickling a minor/child)

- tickle till they faint

- exposed bodies (again with the second point)

Rules when requesting: (there is not that much nor that strict at all)

- make the request now (I sometimes get this and I get really pressured to finish it.)

- drawing too many ocs (maximum 5 characters, but it depends on the details too)

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Tags meanings:

#starfaderambling = me yapping (common)

#starfade's reblogii ★ = reblogs (uncommon)

#starfade poll = my poll (rare)

#starfade's vent??? = might be a vent but also not

#starfade's vent... = ... a vent (when I make a vent post, I am going to let it be there for a few days before deleting it for the sake of making the blog positive)

#starlee?? = might be in a lee mood

#starlee = LEE MOOD BRRRRR-

#starler? = might be in a ler mood

#starler = Ler mood OFC-

#starfade pos vent <3★ = positive vent <3

#st★rlore = in the second syllable (keep in the lookout for this >:])

#stanaloglore★ = not the official name of the lore for my analog horror children- :<

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If you made it this far then you can like the pinned post tysm! ★ :)

#sfw interaction only #safe space #starfaderambling #sfw #sfw tickle blog #sfw tickle community #starfade's reblogii ★#starfade poll #starfade's vent???#starfade's vent...#starler?#starler #starlee??#starlee #st★rlore

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jess-themess05 · 1 year ago

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ooh i love these :D

Name: Jessica or Jess! or basically any version of that works fine

Time: 11:06 pm, should probably be asleep but yk whatever

Zodiac: Scorpio

Favorite Color: Green!!! or basically any forest-y colors, yellow is also very nice :)

Favorite Movie: i’m not really good at remembering favs, but Encanto is on the mind right now 👍

Favorite Series: uhh, Moomin Valley (2019 and also 1990’s) currently!

Favorite Characters:

1. Sun and Moon (FNAF SB)

2. The Narrator (The Stanley Parable)

3. Snufkin (Moomin series)

4. Grian (Hermitcraft/MCYT) (i hope that counts i can’t think of anyone else)

5. The Collector (The Owl House)

6. Kris/Ralsei (Deltarune) i can’t pick i’m sorry

7. Papyrus (Undertale)

8. Leo (Stardew Valley)

9. Peridot (Steven Universe..i promise i’m not trying to copy you cero i swear)

10. Stolas (Helluva Boss)

Last song played: Normal People Things by Lovejoy (new single that just got released yAAAAAA)

URL story: it rhymes and suits me pretty well i’d say

Thank you for the tag cero!!! so sorry it took me a few days to respond but i very much appreciate it :]

here’s some no pressure tags, sorry if you’ve already been tagged though lol @iceblink123 @booogy-man @chaireem and anyone else who wants to! cant recall everyone atm so feel free to say i tagged ya <3

GET TO KNOW ME TAG GAME

Name: Sol or Cero!

Time: 5:40pm

Zodiac: Virgo

Favorite color: Purble

Favorite movie: Wolfwalkers!!!! Love that film fr

Favorite series: The Owl House

Fav characters:

The Collector (TOH)

Harley Quinn (Batman the Animated Series)

Crona (Soul Eater)

Snufkin (Moomin)

Edmundo (Cuentos Espantosos)

Moon (FNAF)

Kenma (Haikyu)

Milo (Devil's Candy)

Flick (Animal Crossing)

Peridot (Steven Universe)

Last song: Brutus (Instrumental) I have it on repeat hsjshsjs

URL story: I used to have a really shitty sleep schedule hsjshssj now I sleep a lot tho lmao

Tagging: @shookethdev @chaoticgouda @little-sw33tie @eyenaku @kazzykatt @kitsvoidcorner @jess-themess05 and anyone who wants to!

#tag game #beloved mutuals #i don’t mean to copy you cero we just seem to have mutual taste #so yippe for that!#thank you for the tag though hehehe #long post #kinda?#maybe

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i-need-entertainment · 4 years ago

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Thank you @citrussweetie for the tag! Their post can be seen here~

Game Rules:

Tell me characters you self ship with...

1. The date you wish they’d take you on

2. The date they’d actually take you on

3. Your usual hangout

4. Their favorite thing about you

Washio Tatsuki:

1. I would like to go to the movies with him. To be honest, I don’t really like the movies cause I have the attention span of a small rabbit, but it just seems like it’d be better with him there. After we’d go out to eat somewhere where we could talk about the movie and him making snarky comments about the bad decisions made.

2. I think he would take me on a classic date. Like a nice dinner, and then a walk on the boardwalk (I live by water, and it has always been a dream of mine for the Haikyuu!! Boys to walk with me on the boardwalk😞) where he holds my hand and gives me his jacket when it gets cold. (lol he’s one of the few characters whose jacket would actually be big on me cause I have *shoulders*)

3. This might be weird but hEaR me OUT. Him driving (definitely not cause I can’t..) while I sit in the passengers seat, us going to get groceries or food or something like that. He would let me play whatever music I wanted (@foodacoochie you already know who we’re listening to~) and smile as I beautifully sang along.

4. The fact that i’m reliable. I’m a responsible person, I do what’s expected of me and I do the best I can! I hate letting people down, and I want to be someone people can rely on. I think he’d like that he wouldn’t have to worry about me as much because I am very independent, I’d also be someone he could go to for his problems because I would listen.

Numai Kazuma:

1. I’d want to go on an amusement park date! For some reason when I imagined going on a date with Numai, amusement park was the first thing I thought of. I just think it’d be so cute!! I’m not a fan of crowds, but I wouldn’t feel uncomfy cause he would be there to ~protect me~😌

2. I honestly think he’d actually take me on the amusement park date! (that or I really just wanna go to six flags right now-) He seems like someone who might be a little clumsy in a relationship at first, and dates is one of those things he just has to get a hang of, so I think an amusement park is a good first/second date cause I think he’d be more comfortable. (Did that make any sense?)

3. Our usual hangout would be at one of our houses just lounging on the couch on our phones with our limbs all tangled together and eating some kind of snack, showing each other funny stuff we find and what not~

4. I think his favorite thing about me would be my character. I’m very morally inclined, and I do what’s right because it’s right, I have a strong moral compass. I think he’d like that because he hates being called a cheater for being on Nohebi, so I think he’d like that, I also can’t stand cheating/lying.

Shirabu Kenjirou:

1. I would like to go to a museum with Shirabu. I love museums, I always have. I don’t even care what it’s about, I love pretty much all subjects, but history museums are my favorite.

2. I think he’d be down for the museum date, but I think he’d choose something like one of those couples paint lessons (?). Like, you go to a one time art lesson where all the couples follow an instructor to paint a picture. idk I just think that sounds like something he’d pick, and it’d be really cute.

3. Probably him making me sit down at my desk and do my homework :p It’s not like I’m bad at school, there’s just so many better things I could be doing. So it would probably be him making me do my homework when it’s assigned, not the night before it’s due😔

4. My bluntness. I am very blunt. I have a filter, and i’m sure it’s in great condition because it’s never been used✌😙. I’m not like Ushijima blunt, I have social skills, but things have slipped before. Nonetheless, I think he’d like that i’m straightforward and to the point.

Iizuna Tsukasa:

1. I would like to go on a beach date with him! For starters, I think he’d look real nice with sunglasses on (don’t judge me, it’s 12:40 am and i’m halfway through an iced coffee, I’m not thinking my thoughts all the way through anymore), and I think it’d be a good relaxation day, to just get away from everything and spend time with each other. I do think he’d splash me, or at the very least try to throw me into the water.

2. I think he’d take me to the mall, where we’d just walk around and look at the shops. I do think he’d be one of the best Haikyuu!! Boys to take to the mall especially if you’re shopping for clothes. He’s stuck between 2 sisters, he knows how to give solid advice without falling into the ‘does this make me look fat’ trap that most boys do. He’d also carry the bags🥰 (whether he does it by will, or by force is irrelevant)

3. Us cooking together! Whether it was baking a cake at 10 pm or making dinner together, I think it’d be fun to cook with Iizuna, and a regular thing that we just did together.

4. My sense of humor. I have a very sharp wit, and that paired with my bluntness has ngl lead to some funny conversations. I think he’d appreciate it because it would let him wind down from being captain of a powerhouse school. Cause with me he gets to be himself, with no pressure to be perfect.

Kunimi Akira:

1. I’d like him to take me to a baseball game. Now, I don’t actually like sports, but for some reason I like baseball. More like I like going to baseball games, cause it’s its own experience, but he would ‘watch’ them with me and eat a bunch of the good stadium food.

2. He’d take me to a concert. I think he would do this for my birthday, cause I love music. Even if he didn’t like the singer/band, he would go just to make me happy. AND, concerts are pretty fun even if you don’t know the artist, so I think he’d enjoy it too!

3. Him laying his head on my lap as he took a nap while I wrote my stories. I think he’d be pretty chill with me simping for fictional men, cause he’s my boyfriend, and it makes me happy so he’s fine with it~ The typing would just lull him to sleep faster so he’d really be fine with it.

4. My laugh. I can’t really explain this one, I was thinking one day and I just thought he would like it. idk man, this one just made sense to me~

Tagging: I highly recommend doing this!! It was so much fun🥺 Also, you don’t have to do as many as I did, I just got carried away! (and sorry for spamming you guys with tags you don’t have to participate!! I just appreciate you guys💗 Feel free to tell me if you no longer want to be tagged I will stop)

@foodacoochie @cowninja1@fushiguroll @motoyafightclub @keijicyl @theuntamedmulti @owlnymph @aquariarose + Anyone who wants to cause it really was fun<3 **also, make a separate post cause this’ll get real long, real quick**

#zap-reblogs

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diedahxro · 3 years ago

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Rules -- for mobile

Don’t be afraid to reach out, I don’t bite! You can always just hop into my inbox and hit me up.

Be nice, don’t pressure me into rping or replying. I’m semi-selective and I will make sure I’m comfortable.

Please don't godmod. It just immediately takes my enjoyment out of a thread. If you're unsure if something is considered godmodding just hit me up via pm I never mind chatting about our threads.

I am crossover, multiship and multiverse friendly. I love shipping and am more than willing to explore various relationships. | please do respect that I write my Jason as gay and a power/disaster bottom - that's just how I like him ♡

(that being said, please don’t try to push me into shipping our muses if I don’t feel it)

I have a busy life outside of rping and sometimes I will take some time to reply. I also might reply to some threads quicker, if the inspiration hits me, this doesn’t mean i’m ignoring you or hate your muse!

I’m 21+ myself, so I’m comfortable with NSFW themes, however I don’t rp NSFW with anyone under 18. Please respect this.

I’m fine with NSFW, sexual themes, violence, blood and dark themes but I will not write anything involving, zoophilia, necrophilia, pedophilia etc.

I'm cool with batships (and personally do ship Jason with Bruce and Dick) as long as it's not creepy/grooming/underage

I am NOT my muse. Even if my muse engages in sexual acts with yours, please don’t assume that I’m interested in you in that way. Sexual dms regarding the mun lead to instant blocking.

Please be aware that I write my Jason with serious issues. His messed up past left him with PTSD, abandonment issues and he's generally messed up.

I will tag but topics of child prostitution, abuse, abandonment and death/murder might be present.

I'm also not 100% up to date on DC lore so my Jason is set sometime past Under the Red Hood. Might include Outlaws and other tidbits but I might not know everything that's going on lmao.

If you read my rules feel free to pop into my asks and send me “Fuck Batman” or whatever else you feel like!

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surviiived · 4 years ago

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Guidelines

If you don’t agree to these rules and don’t want to follow me back—and if I have already followed you—please just HARD block me. It’ll help keep my dash cleaner, as well as make sure in my forgetfulness I won’t follow you again. Don’t worry, I won’t be upset lol. Thank you so much for looking at my rules!! 🖤🖤

Basic Rules:

-SEMI SELECTIVE AND MUTUALS ONLY. This is for my own safety and feeling of security. If you want to roleplay with me, follow me. I will do the same for you if I’m willing to interact.

-OCS, AUS, AND ALL OTHER CHARACTERS WELCOME. I don’t care who your muse is. I’m all for OCs, crossovers, AUs, anything!! Just know I’m a bit more selective towards fandoms I don’t know about lol

-NO ONE-LINERS. I need some more interest in our thread from your end so I don’t lose muse as well. One-liners are fine for crack threads, but nowhere else. I’m fine with single to multiparagraph, and that’s how I will be writing.

-NO GODMODDING. I cannot express this enough. It’s my biggest pet peeve. Just don’t, or I’ll end the rp immediately.

-PLEASE USE CORRECT GRAMMAR. I’m a bit of a grammar freak, so seriously. At least try. However, If English isn’t your first language, I COMPLETELY understand.

-MULTIVERSE, MULTISHIP. Every thread is a different verse, every ship a different verse. Simple.

-DONT REBLOG THINGS FROM ME. Honestly, guys this just gets on my nerves. It’s a bit irrational...but also irritating because when I check my phone and see a notification from a mutual, I get excited because I think it’s a reply! But then I realize you just reblogged that meme/musing/whatever. Please, only reblog threads from me and everything else from the source. This includes memes, musings, pictures, and promos. Also, pls don’t reblog my PSAs, if you agree with them let me know so I can post it to my rp memes blog, which I would LOVE for you to reblog it from!!

-REBLOGGING ASKS AND TRIMMING THREADS. I’m not as strict as a lot of people over this, but some mutuals of mine are so please trim your threads when you reply to me. If you are in a situation where you can’t, that’s perfectly fine. However, thanks to this new Tumblr update I cannot trim asks because I don’t have xKit. So I ask for you to trim them for me, and if you can’t either then I’ll figure something out. Also with asks, I’m fine with you reblogging an ask to continue it. I will turn it into a separate thread for my friends’ sake.

-UNFOLLOWS. There’s a low chance I will unfollow someone, and the only reasons I can think of are spreading drama, being inactive for over a month without a hiatus, something else that annoys me, or too many OOC posts. The latter is why I am hesitant to follow back personal blogs who roleplay on said blog, but it’s not impossible. I won’t follow personal blogs from side blogs, but if you let me know you are a side blog I will gladly follow where you roleplay.

-DONT INVOLVE ME IN DRAMA. I hate drama. I’m the type of person who wants absolutely nothing to do with it. If I ask about what’s going on, then you’re welcome to tell me, but other than that, don’t talk to me about it. I won’t take sides. I won’t tell other people what’s going on. I’ll only act like nothing’s happening.

-SPOILERS. This is kinda hard with an Identity V blog... I don’t really anticipate there being any spoilers on this blog?? But if a new diary entry comes out or a deduction for a new character, sure, I’ll tag it for a couple of weeks.

-REQUESTING MUSES. If you don’t request a specific character in an ask or a starter call, I won’t write it. I just don’t have the time to go to you and ask which character you want, nor try to guess what you were thinking when you sent something in or liked a starter call. So I just won’t respond to whatever it is. This is the case when requesting one of my muses or picking one of your muses, if you’re a multi like me. Sorry..!!

Romance Rules:

-NO SMUT. I can’t stress this enough. It’s not that I’m a minor (which I’m not), it’s that it makes me uncomfortable. You will never see smut on this blog. I’m fine with heavy make out scenes, but when the clothes start to come off is where I request a fade to black.

-I LOVE TO WRITE ROMANCE THREADS. I’m a pretty big hopeless romantic, as that’s where most of my muse is generated from. I may want to add a ship to our thread at some point, but will never force it.

-REFUSALS. NO pedofilia, NO incest, NO rape, or ANYTHING nasty like that. I understand that sometimes in writing dark situations occur, as some of these things are in my muses’ backstory. So, if you write any of those things, I’m not going to block you. However, if you request to do any of that stuff with me, I’ll say no. Press the issue, I’ll hard block you. I shouldn’t have to hear you request it the first time, as it’s right here in my rules and that means you didn’t read them. But I’ll go easy until you cross a line.

-THERE MUST BE CHEMISTRY. Don’t bother trying to make a ship work that just won’t click, it’s a waste of time. But I’m more than willing to try things and see how they work..!!

-PLEASE RESPECT MY MUSES’ SEXUALITIES. You can tell a muse’s sexuality by what it says on their about. Most are bi/pan, but a few may be different.

Rules and things about me:

-I HAVE LOTS OF WRITING EXPERIENCE. I’ve been writing since I was maybe even seven years old, played games where I pretended to be a character irl since I was five, and have been actually roleplaying for approximately 7 years now. I’ve been roleplaying on Tumblr for three years. I really love writing, you know?

-WARNING, I WRITE GORE. I tend to go into detail about pain, suffering, death, and just very demented topics. That’s just a warning. If you have a problem with that, you may not want to follow me…

-TAGGING. Gore, murder, suicide, and other dark and triggering things will be tagged, but swearing will not. I swear far too much for me to remember to tag it. Also, I don’t post NSFW images or threads on this blog, so don’t worry about that, but I will tag asks and memes that can be perceived as nsfw. I tag things like this (using death as an example): “tw: death”. If you have any triggers, PLEASE let me know so I can tag them. There’s always a chance I might forget about something, and if I do please tell me. I’ll make sure not to forget a second time. Also, I ask you all tag vomit mentions, even if it’s just written, and ESPECIALLY TAG VISUALS OF THROW UP!!!! That is my ONLY trigger. Thank you.

-RESPONDING TIME. I’m a college student, high school student, and I work, so my responding time isn’t what it used to be lol. Please don’t pressure me over that..!! I also post most threads via queue unless I just need to send it out ASAP. I won’t bother you if it takes a little while to reply. We all have lives outside of Tumblr!!

-I’M NOT GOING TO SEND IN PASSWORDS. It just adds to my anxiety, and I don’t like that. That’s why I don’t ever ask someone to send a password in and just ask that they like my rules post! Just know I will always read someone’s rules before interacting.

-I’M ALWAYS HERE IF YOU NEED SOMEONE TO TALK TO. Honestly, I want to help! If something’s wrong and you want to tell me about it, I’m all ears. I hate being upset or depressed myself, so I like to try to make others feel better. It helps with my own sadness.

That’s all for right now..! Happy roleplaying~!!

like this post if you have read it and agree to it, please.

Hello! My name’s Kiki. There isn’t really much to say about me, except that I love to roleplay!! That and write, of course. And draw. And sing. So I guess I love a lot of stuff lol. Also, I am diagnosed with ADD (attention-deficit disorder), so please bear with me..!! One last thing, I’m 18 as of November 2020.

If you ever need someone to talk to, I’m right here and always accepting PMs!!

My main account is twx-sid3d, but I’m rarely ever on there so here is the best place to contact me. I also have a multiverse oc sideblog @hxlf-bred that’s connected to my multi, @nycttophilic.

Thanks for reading! Have a nice day~!

#{ Rules }#{ Mun Things }#~ʷᶦᵗʰ ᵉᵛᵉʳʸᵒⁿᵉ ᵃʳᵒᵘⁿᵈ ʰᵉʳ ᵗᵉˡˡᶦⁿᵍ ʰᵉʳ ᵗʰᵉ ʷᵃʸ ᵗᵒ ᵍᵒ; ˢᵒ ˢʰᵉ ʷᵃˡᵏˢ ᵗʰʳᵒᵘᵍʰ ʷᵒʳˡᵈˢ ᵃˡᵒⁿᵉ~ [OOC]

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hxlf-bred · 4 years ago

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Guidelines

Basic Rules:

-SEMI SELECTIVE AND MUTUALS ONLY. This is for my own safety and feeling of security. If you want to roleplay with me, follow me. I will do the same for you if I’m willing to interact.

-NO GODMODDING. I cannot express this enough. It’s my biggest pet peeve. Just don’t, or I’ll end the Rp immediately.

-PLEASE USE CORRECT GRAMMAR. I’m a bit of a grammar freak, so seriously. At least try. However, if English isn’t your first language, I COMPLETELY understand.

-MULTIVERSE, MULTISHIP. Every thread is a different verse, every ship a different verse. Simple.

-REBLOGGING ASKS AND TRIMMING THREADS. I’m not as strict as a lot of people over this, but some mutuals of mine are so please trim your threads when you reply to me. If you are in a situation where you can’t, that’s perfectly fine and I’ll do it for you. Same with asks, I’m fine with you reblogging an ask to continue it. I will turn it into a separate thread for my friends’ sake.

-SPOILERS. I will tag spoilers for everything that’s not in the anime. For example, if a post contains something in the BSD fandom that’s not in the anime, I will tag it. I doubt I will tag threads for spoilers, and if there’s a character that’s manga only I won’t tag it (ESPECIALLY if I write that character, like Daki.)

Romance Rules:

-REFUSALS. NO pedofilia, NO incest, NO rape, or ANYTHING nasty like that. I understand that sometimes in writing dark situations occur, as some of these things are in my muses’ backstory. So, if you condom any of those things, I’m not going to block you. However, if you request to do any of that stuff with me, I’ll say no. Press the issue, I’ll hard block you. I shouldn’t have to hear you request it the first time, as it’s right here in my rules and that means you didn’t read them. But I’ll go easy until you cross a line.

-THERE MUST BE CHEMISTRY. Don’t bother trying to make a ship work that just won’t click, it’s a waste of time. But I’m more than willing to try things and see how they work..!!

Rules and things about me:

That’s all for right now..! Happy roleplaying~!!

like this post if you have read it and agree to it, please.

Hello! My name’s Kiki. There isn’t really much to say about me, except that I love to Roleplay!! That and write, of course. And draw. And sing. So I guess I love a lot of stuff lol. Also, I am diagnosed with ADD (attention-deficit disorder), so please bear with me..!! One last thing, I’m 18 as of 2020.

If you ever need someone to talk to, I’m right here and always accepting PMs!!

My main account is twx-sid3d, but I’m rarely ever on there so here is the best place to contact me. I also have a main multimuse blog over at @nycttophilic and an Identity V multimuse at @surviiived!!

Thanks for reading! Have a nice day~!

#{ Rules }#~wíth єvєrчσnє αrσund hєr tєllíng hєr thє wαч tσ gσ; ѕσ ѕhє wαlkѕ thrσugh wσrldѕ αlσnє~ [ooc]#{ Mun Things }

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nycttophilic · 5 years ago

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Guidelines

Basic Rules:

-SEMI SELECTIVE AND MUTUALS ONLY. This is for my own safety and feeling of security. If you want to roleplay with me, follow me. I will do the same for you if I’m willing to interact.

-NO GODMODDING. I cannot express this enough. It’s my biggest pet peeve. Just don’t, or I’ll end the Rp immediately.

-PLEASE USE CORRECT GRAMMAR. I’m a bit of a grammar freak, so seriously. At least try. However, If English isn’t your first language, I COMPLETELY understand.

-MULTIVERSE, MULTISHIP. Every thread is a different verse, every ship a different verse. Simple.

Romance Rules:

-THERE MUST BE CHEMISTRY. Don’t bother trying to make a ship work that just won’t click, it’s a waste of time. But I’m more than willing to try things and see how they work..!!

-PLEASE RESPECT MY MUSES’ SEXUALITIES. You can tell a muse’s sexuality by what it says on their about. Most are bi/pan, but a few may be different.

Rules and things about me:

That’s all for right now..! Happy roleplaying~!!

like this post if you have read it and agree to it, please.

If you ever need someone to talk to, I’m right here and always accepting PMs!!

My main account is twx-sid3d, but I’m rarely ever on there so here is the best place to contact me. I also have a multiverse oc sideblog @hxlf-bred and an Identity V multimuse at @surviiived.

Thanks for reading! Have a nice day~!

#{ Rules }

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soulfood-fics · 5 years ago

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Oreo - Chapter 3

Here is Chapter 3, I hope you enjoy it!

Hopefully, I added everyone from chapter 2 in the tags.

Just in case you missed it, here are chapters: 1, 2

mood boards: John Boyega

Pairing: John Boyega x Black!OC

Inspiration: John did an interview where he said a girl broke up with him after seeing him on a Star Wars billboard, this story is a variation of that but with my own little twist.

“Are you going to sit or do I need to bring the table to you?”

She didn't hear John come in nor did she realize how close he was standing. Akida could feel his chest pressing against her shoulder and when she turned her head to look at him, their lips were so close she could feel his breath.

“Hi, Kiddie.”

“Hi, John.” Just to be safe, Akida took a step back to put some distance between them.

No romance. She was on a mission to get some truth out of him.

“Before we sit, I have a few questions.”

Her assertiveness caught John off guard, the first time they met and last time they spoke she was timider. He wondered what had changed between that morning and now.

“Alright, but I have one request.” looking Akida in the eyes he says, “I want you to eat.”

“What?”

“I want you to eat. Get whatever you want, this is my treat. If I wanted to eat with a stick, I would've ordered Chinese food.”

Before she could respond, Akida’s stomach growled reminding her that she’d worked through lunch. Her hopes of getting by on a salad and a few breadsticks were gone.

“Fine.” Resisting the urge to cross her arms, she walked to the table.

John got to the table first to pull out her chair, then sat across from her.

“First question?”

“Why did you reserve the restaurant for a private dinner?” This time she didn't stop her arms from folding in front of her. The interrogation had begun.

“Well…” John paused, He could lie and say he just wanted some alone time with her, or tell the truth, he was afraid the date would go bad and paparazzi would see. “I’m a messy eater. It’s really embarrassing.”

Good job, not a lie but not the truth either, He told himself. He laughed and Akida laughed along with him. He thought he was safe.

“So we're lying?” uh oh, John wasn't as convincing as he’d thought and Akida could see right through him.

There was no way out of this situation for him. Either way, he’d end up ruining their evening and messing up any chance he had with Akida. She was staring him down, waiting for an answer for what felt like a lifetime. He went into a panic and said the first thing that came to mind.

“What made you change your mind?”

Akida already had her purse in her hand and was mentally halfway out the door. “Why does it matter? I'm here arent I?”

“You seemed pretty set on not seeing me again. Something must’ve changed.”

He had his doubts that Akida only changed her mind because she found out who he was. Now she was the one being interrogated, and John knew he must’ve upset her when her hand tightened into a fist.

“Maybe I should leave then.”

As she got up from the table, a woman came out of what must’ve been the kitchen.

“Akida this is Chef Faith Adeyemi. She -”

“She won the Jollof festival in July.” Akida was there when she’d won but Elijah had insisted they leave. Since she wasn't Ghanian, he felt she must've cheated.

“It’s very nice to meet you,” Faith brought Akida into a hug, putting pressure on her shoulders to force her to sit back down. “I’ve prepared something very special for the two of you this evening.”

Several waiters approached the table carrying plates and placed them in front of Akida and John. The chef explained each dish in detail, but Akida only had her eye on the Jollof, happy that he’d kept his promise.

John knew Akida was already on edge and could tell he’d made things worse. Once he knew they were alone, he tried to redeem himself.

“Just to clarify, it wasn't a lie. Honestly, I eat like a horse.”

“I know.” Akida smiled up at him. “You had sesame seeds on your cheek when we met.”

“Why didn't you say something?”

Akida shrugged in response. She thought it was cute that he didn't care how he looked and was actually enjoying his food. She thought he was cute in general.

“So you just let me walk around with food on my face?” John laughed as he spoke.

She really liked the way he laughed with his whole face, eyes shut tight and mouth wide open. But she couldn't let him know, so she just shrugged again and focused on her food

“Oh, what is it now?” John asked using a thick Nigerian accent. “ Why are you so quiet?”

“Nothing. Just thinking.” She didn't look up from her food

“What are you thinking about?”

“Are lightsabers heavy?” Akida’s question made John choke on his food.

He didn't realize she’d already found out about him and wasn't sure how much she knew. Fame changed the people around him and once he got some clout from Star Wars, John lost a lot of close friends and family.

“They're actually pretty light. Hence the name.”

“Also, who is Luke and why doesn't he know who his father is?”

“What?”

“You know ‘Luke I am your father.’”

“Have you ever seen Star Wars?” She clearly didn't know much about the franchise.

Akida shook her head no and continued to eat.

“... Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia are brother and sister.” John spent the rest of the evening trying to explain the films to Akida. “And Darth Vadar, who is Anakin Skywalker, was their dad.” Most of the information went over her head. “His name means dark father…” He could tell she was trying to keep up but got lost when he started talking about galaxies.

“And where do you come in?”

“My character comes in a little later.”

In his attempt to explain the battles between the resistance and the first order John accidentally knocks his empty plate onto the floor.

“Sorry, I guess I got a little carried away.” They both bent down and start picking up the pieces of the plate.

“No you're good, I enjoyed listening to you talk. You’re very passionate about what you do.”

“Acting has always been my dream and now I get paid for it.” As John stood he let out a deep laugh and helped Akida up. She placed the broken pieces on the table.

“We probably should've left that for the staff.”

“It’s getting pretty late, one less thing for them clean.” He played with the broken pieces and tried to put them back together.

Akida hadn't checked the time since she had gotten there, so when she looked she was a little shocked to see that it was 10:30 pm.

“I still have some time before I should head back home, do you want to get out of here?”

“Oh, sure! I’ll be quiet so you can tell me about you this time.” John put on his coat and reached for Akida's hand.

“Don't we have to pay?” Private dinners were very new to Akida and she wasn't sure how they worked.

“I already paid for the night, love.”

Oh, he got money. Akida still wasn't comfortable just leaving so she left a tip on the table.

While Akida had her back turned Johns phone rang.

“I've got to take this. Give me a second.” John held up a finger and stepped into the lobby.

Akida didn't want to eavesdrop but couldn't help herself so she took a few steps closer to the lobby. She couldn't hear the full conversation but was able to make out some of what John was saying.

“I know, I know. Daddy will be home soon. Be good for me, Okay?.... I Love you too.”

Then the conversation was over and Akida wanted the night to be over also. There was no way for her to process what she’d just heard.

“I gotta go.” She pushed past John and ran through the lobby. A lump had formed in her throat and she was afraid of what else would come out.

“Where are you going?” He asked. Akida didn't answer so he ran after her. “What's going on?”

She didn't stop running until she was outside. The cold night air hit the wet lines on her cheeks. Before she turned around, Akida wiped her tears. Then she looked at John and put her hands up in surrender.

“I don't know what type of game this is but I don't want to play. You and whoever that girl is can find someone else to mess with.” She left John at the restaurant and walked to her car.

Once she was inside with the doors locked, Akida let all the tears fall.

“I knew this was a mistake. ”She whispered repeatedly banging her head on the steering wheel.

Regret and betrayal stung her heart and she was mad at no one but herself.

That's All Folks! Thanks to the BWWG for their help

@ghostfacekill-monger @l-auteuse @twistedcharismaaa

@honeychicana @chaneajoyyy @chasingsunlight @raysunshine78 @notsomellowmushroom

#the OREO series #john boyega #john boyega x black oc #fan fiction

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s3tracha · 5 years ago

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Paranormal... activities ?

Am I capable of naming my stories ? Probably, if I tried. Do I try ? Absolutely not.

Hewwo evewyone, I usually never post my writing on sideblogs and such but look, this sideblog is for the boys, there’s a challenge specifically for the boys, I’m not about to post it on my writing sideblog. Nobody follows it anyway and I’m not a fool

I know I’m not posting this in time. :3c

Summary: in short, the adventures of Minho and Jisung in the abandoned house.

Content warning: I don’t think there’s any warning to be given ? It’s supposed to be spooky month but it’s more humourous than anything ! I guess there’s some cussing though. And maybe bad English, redundant phrasing, #notanativespeakergang.

Reblogs are very much appreciated - and if you wanna add commentary in the tags or replies you’re more than welcome to do so !

[4:12 pm]

“ You know what ? This is going to be so much fun. No, really, we’re about to have a great time - why would we not enjoy it ? We’re paranormal investigators ! Surely, it can’t go wrong. “

[11:43 pm]

“ This is the worst thing we’ve ever done. “

“ Mh. “

“ This is so, so not fun at all. “

“ Mh. “

“ I hate everything about this. I wanna go home. Can we go home ? “

“ Mh. “

“ … Are you listening to me ? “

“ Mh. “

With that last response, Jisung frowned and looked back at his friend. … Silence. Minho was completely silent. Mouth agape, eyes kind of glaring at everything and nothing at the same time, his hand holding onto Jisung’s arm pretty tightly now that he was paying attention to it… What, really ? He was going to have to be the driving force here ? Not that he wasn’t already aware of that, but… ah, geez. The younger teen took a few seconds before exhaling a soft sigh and looking around them again.

Minho’s reaction was understandable. The house wasn’t only abandoned, it looked awful ! Like the walls were rotting ( and he was pretty sure that wasn’t something walls usually did but he couldn’t attest to this if questioned about it ), the floor was much dirtier than any damn house floor should be… Weird, unsettling paintings everywhere, clothes here and there, so many broken glass bottles he couldn’t count them - some of them hadn’t been finished and the liquid which he could only assume to be alcohol had given the place quiet a stench. Terror was a pretty appropriate reaction to a place like this. He’d seen places that were less scary to sleep at.

Maybe sending them both together hadn’t been the greatest idea but he hadn’t considered the cons hard enough before agreeing. And even if he hadn’t agreed, he couldn’t have changed it.

As a full team, they were nine, rotating in two pairs each time and trying to not send the same two people all the time. The two who’d investigate were chosen randomly and, sometimes the same person could go twice in a row… As a result, this was Minho’s third time this month. Needless to say, going with Chan and then Hyunjin hadn’t been very beneficial to his already very pronounced fear of… pretty much everything. When it wasn’t the ghosts and demons and whatnot scaring him, it was the other boy present with him. With Hyunjin it wasn’t necessarily intentional, Hyunjin was just… loud at the wrong time.

Maybe agreeing to being paranormal investigators along with their entire friend group had been a mistake in itself… Couldn’t really back out anymore.

Now Jisung wasn’t exactly the most reassuring presence either but for an entirely different reason: though not as scared as himself, he was just… more pressure. He wasn’t scared as much as he was stressed and tried to play it off like he wasn’t, obviously and maybe that made it worse. Either way, Minho was both terrified and spacing out.

Great. Truly, the most fun they’d have in their entire life.

“ Uh, so, about the occurrences… Seungmin said we should be able to hear footsteps and some whispers here, the whispers would come from a crying man, and maybe he can move stuff too so… “ Jisung spoke again, his voice shaking slightly as he tried to bring himself back on the right track. The track of not being scared for the sake of his poor friend who clearly still wasn’t listening to him.

“ Poor guy passed of heartbreak after his wife took the kids and left… Maybe he’s not that mean. Maybe– maybe he won’t try to scare us, y’know… “

He trailed off, eventually just keeping to himself. Kind of forgot where he was going with this anyway. He was more focused on observing their surroundings while Minho was seemingly finally coming back to his senses - and with a small gasp and his other hand now holding Jisung’s arm as well, he shook his head to make sure he was, at last, processing things right.

“ Great, so, what’s up with the footsteps then ? “ He immediately asked, trying to take a look around as well. The least he could do.

“ Oh, dude had a pet dog that let itself die after his owner passed… “

“ A dog ? “

“ And a cat. But dog footsteps are louder than cat footsteps. “

“ Of course they are. “

Minho rolled his eyes, shaking his head again with a sigh. That earned Jisung another frown. “ What ? It’s true ! “

“ Mh. “

Ugh, great. The boy stared for a few seconds before sighing in his turn. Was there really no way to put the other in a good mood ? Well, the setting probably didn’t help either, but now that was just getting upset over a problem that didn’t even exist. So he was afraid of ghosts but cat ghosts are fine ? Ridiculous ! For one, he was scared of both equally.

Still, as much as he hated doing this - and especially doing this with Minho -, he at least wanted the atmosphere to not be tense for no reason at all. He had to fix it. He had to make something up on the spot and then the others would make fun of him for it when they’d hear about it. Yup.

“ W- well, I’d forgotten about that but… Um, Seungmin also said that… that you can– I mean, sometimes, rarely, you can hear… uh… the cat ! You can hear it ! “

An admirable attempt. Maybe the other’s face lit up a little at the words, too.

“ He said that ? “

“ Yeah ! If we’re lucky… I mean, maybe lucky isn’t the right word but we can hear it meow ! And… purr… and scratch the walls…? “

“ You’re kidding, of course lucky’s the right word ! Okay, where do we start ? “

The sudden enthusiasm from his previously mortified friend sure managed to throw Jisung off. Once again staring for a few seconds, time for him to think of something to answer with and to deal with how easily his lies had been eaten up, god he’d hate himself if Minho found out he lied, he eventually seemed to gain all of his confidence back and flashed a bright smile. One of those smiles that make it seem like he’s not only confident, but cocky about it as well.

“ I suggest we… go separate ways to visit ! So we can get it all done fa– “

“ Pass, next. “

“ Wha– Why ? I thought we were good ! “ Jisung exclaimed, visibly taken aback once again. Was this ever going to make any sense ?

“ So long as I haven’t heard the cat I’m not gonna be any good and I certainly don’t wanna be left alone here,” Minho retorted, his grip on Jisung’s arm not loosening. “ Chan tried. I left the building. “

“ But Chan’s an ass when we’re investigating, and I’m not ! “ He knew he wasn’t changing anybody’s mind. “ Ah, fine. But we’re gonna have to stay awake muuuch longer. “

Minho shrugged. “ Fine. I got snacks in my bag. “

“ Well, cool. “

“ Yeah. “

Silence. Jisung was pulling a face. Minho was looking around, though this time probably more avoiding Jisung’s face than actually looking around. Jisung considered the possibility of them doing standup comedy rather than paranormal investigation in the future, with how comical every situation they got into ended up being, but that probably wouldn’t really pay bills… not that paranormal investigation did though. Oh, and they had all of this on tape, right. He’d kind of forgotten they had cameras.

The silence kept on going before Jisung of course it’d be him gave in and gestured vaguely. “ I guess we’re gonna start with… downstairs. That’s not where the guy died apparently so we shouldn’t see anything but we can still hear the footsteps, and the sobs. But we’d hear them better upstairs so for now– “

Cut off by a door slamming, followed by the both of them screaming and Jisung almost dropping the camera he was holding. And silence again. Two weak hearts needed some time to calm down and assess the new state of things, which was different in one way: a door, they did not know which nor where it was, was now closed.

This time, rather than talk, Jisung went and started walking again, Minho being forcibly dragged along despite how reluctant he might’ve been had he been able to be a little more responsive. The lights strapped to his and the other boy’s foreheads were probably the things he was most grateful for at the moment…

Their quiet investigation kept on going until after they’d gone around the kitchen. It had been quick, given the putrid smell they really wanted to get away from as quickly as possible.

Then Jisung laughed.

“ That sure was something, huh ? “ Not an ounce of confidence in his voice. Definitely faking it still though.

“ Sure was, “ Minho muttered, nose slightly scrunched up from the smell still, “ and also I don’t think I wanna see what the restroom’s like so let’s skip it. “

“ Yeah, okay. “

He’d already avoided some rooms with Jeongin once. They just pretended they lost the footage when asked about it. Surely that didn’t only happen when he was part of the investigation, right ? Eh, whatever. He’d just cut off the footage they already had so it’d seem like they opened the door.

“ Okay, anyway… Hello, ghosts ! I am incredibly NOT scared of you, and you can’t do anything to me ! “ Oh, here’s the bravado. “ Let’s just talk and have some tea, and maybe some snacks and– “

“ No, wait. Shh. “

He raised an eyebrow but complied. Something he had feared was Minho being the one to notice something, because who knew how Minho would react to anything ? If he noticed something first he could at least anticipate his reaction. Not his own, but… that was less of a problem, as surprising as it might’ve been given he wasn’t too relaxed either.

And then it came… the footsteps. Jisung felt not only himself going stiff, but Minho as well - his grip tightening on the poor boy’s arm who ended up wincing in pain instead of focusing on the noise.

“ Does… Does the dog attack ? “ Minho whispered, voice shaking slightly.

“ I… No, “ Jisung answered just as quietly, “ please don’t cut off my blood circulation. “

“ Does the dog go upstairs ? “

“ I don’t… think s– Hey, stop ! “

Here they were, rushing to the staircase, and it was Jisung’s turn to be forcefully dragged there since Minho wouldn’t release his arm.

“ Come on, that’s crazy ! There’s a dead man’s ghost on this floor, it isn’t any better ! “ Jisung tried to argue, mentally attempting to rationalise anything they would do in the next eight hours aside from sleeping very uncomfortably and complaining about it.

“ I don’t care, if you don’t know a dog you never know how it can react, everybody knows that ! “

Jisung groaned. Why did things have to be this way ? He’d almost dropped the camera again, if this kept on going like this he’d definitely lose it.

“ … Besides, I sure hope you can’t find any… alive people’s ghosts, “ Minho continued. “ What’s a “dead man’s ghost” ? Redundant. That’s what it is. “

“ Oh, whatever - you got what I meant ! “

Silence should be the third main character given how often it appears but here it is, the silence. More looking around, and kind of… trying to walk around as well, though Jisung wasn’t very into it despite the brave act he’d put on just a few minutes ago.

“ So now that we’re here… Um, we’re supposed to sleep in the kids’ room, “ he explained, trying to figure out which one of these equally dull doors led to the room in question. “ The guy’s ghost never leaves his room but he makes stuff move, so… if you hear chairs moving in the middle of the night… “

“ Yeah, I get the gist of it. “ Pause. “ And I don’t like it one bit. “

“ Guess it’s good you’re with me then, “ a response which prompted a nervous snort. “ Hey, what does that mean ? “

“ Nothing. Let’s get going. “

The next minutes were spent visiting the rooms, trying not to touch things and remaining careful of any noises they might hear. Nothing just yet, aside from the footsteps from before, and even the man’s bedroom seemed pretty okay ! Well, aside from the smell, once again. The kids’ bedroom didn’t smell as bad from what Jisung could remember of the maybe two minutes they’d spent ‘visiting’ it.

“ Hey, look at this, “ Minho called out from the end of Jisung’s arm. “ There’s a journal on the desk. It was left open. “

“ Oh, sick, let’s read it. “

And with this, the two boys jumped onto the journal. Perhaps that wasn’t the best call though ; a few seconds into it and the chair was suddenly thrown into them, reminding them they were kind of invading the privacy of an actual ghost… and yes, they ran out of the room.

Next step was locking themselves up in the kids’ room, quickly setting up their sleeping bags all while remaining glued to each other, each whispering a different list of swears and prayers before Minho spoke up with a desperate “ Man, what the hell ! “, and Jisung responding as desperately with “ I don’t know, dude ! “.

They let themselves plop down on Minho’s sleeping bag. Panting, Jisung dropping the hand-held camera to hold the other just as tight as he was being held, overall looking very comfortable with the situation they were in.

“ It moved. Right. “ Minho asked, though it was more of a statement.

“ Rammed into my legs, yes. “

“ I should’ve been the one to take it, I pointed to the journal... Sorry about that. “

“ Nah... It’s good. I shouldn’t have tried to read it. I could’ve left it alone or something... Not your fault we’re both kinda stupid. “

Jisung trailed off again, slowly resting his head on the older boy’s shoulder and giving up. That was what it was, giving up that act he was putting on so Minho would relax more, now he just wanted to…

“ Didn’t you say something about going home ? “

“ I did… I mean it more now though. “

“ Thought so... Me too. “

[2:37 am]

“ Okay, so… the cameras are set up, with the audio recording. “

“ Correct. “

“ The door and window are closed even though there’s this uh, kind of inconvenient hole in the wall here. “

“ Uhuh. “

“ And you got snacks. “

“ I do. “

“ Then does that mean we get to sleep now ? Shouldn’t get much worse than that… “ Jisung’s sentenced ended with a yawn.

“ Guess you’re right. “ Minho’s voice was as disheartened as it could possibly get. It hadn’t been much but the both of them were drained.

Jisung sighed and took the frontal camera off along with the light, setting it next to the sleeping bag then looking back at his friend, waiting for him to do the same. And he didn’t.

“ … You won’t take it off ? “

“ You never know what can happen - and in case something does happen I need to be prepared. “ Minho turned the frontal light back on as to prove his point, blinding Jisung in the process. “ Dude, you didn’t have to. “

“ Did too ! I let you get hurt once, what am I gonna look like if you get hurt a second time and I do nothing about it ? I’d rather die. “

“ No, I meant... You didn’t have to flash it in my eyes like that. “

“ Oh. “

Silence is back.

“ Sorry. “

“ I’m not mad, don’t worry. “

Minho hummed softly, turning the light back off before slipping into his bag, and all Jisung could do was… watch.

“ Thanks for what you said though. I’d rather you don’t die if possible, three ghosts is enough for one house... “

That earned Minho a small chuckle as he looked back at his friend. He had that sleepy smile on his face but, as comforting as that smile was, he didn’t find it in himself to smile back truthfully. Something about this place just made him sad, he didn’t really like it and the prospect of sleeping in a bag by himself wasn’t really something he fancied either.

The other boy just waited. They were staring at each other for a few minutes with very different thoughts crossing their minds. For Jisung, it was a weird form of separation anxiety despite them sleeping in the same room ; for Minho it was a 13 minute long cat compilation. No thoughts, head empty… only cat. Jisung didn’t move, neither did Minho, but Jisung seemed much more inconvenienced sitting next to the other boy who was arguably comfortably lying down ready to sleep.

More silence. Then Jisung slipping into Minho's sleeping bag as well, snuggling up to his friend - warmth was truly the best way to feel safer. Minho said nothing. Instead of words, he responded with an embrace. A lazy one. He wasn't holding tightly onto Jisung anymore, it was rather relaxed... For the first time of the evening, Minho had relaxed, which only comforted his friend more.

" Night. "

[3:54 am]

... " Minho. Minho ? Hey, dude-- please wake up. "

" Mh... What ? It's late, why won't you let me... "

" I'm feeling something on me. Something that I don't think is your leg. It... it vibrates a little. Oh god. It’s a demon. There’s my sleep paralysis demon sleeping on me. I’m going to die. I’m sorry, Minho, I’m gonna have to leave you- "

Flash. A small noise came from the... mass that was lying on Jisung, then two tiny ears perked up, followed by a meow. Quite the terrifying demon.

“ ... It’s a cat, “ Jisung observed, slowly coming down from his panicked state, while Minho had already sat up to pet the small animal.

“ If your sleep paralysis demon’s a cat, I’m willing to get sleep paralysis. “

“ No, no ! It’s... fine. I had no idea it was a cat... “

Great way to make a fool of himself but it wasn’t like it was the first time, nor did Minho really seem to mind now that he had something to hold onto to keep calm.

“ I wonder how it got in, we kept the door and window closed... “

" Ah, uh. Maybe the small hole. "

" I guess that’d make sense. Well, now that’s settled... We should just go back to sleep, yeah ? “

" Yeah... " Jisung muttered.

That wasn’t something he’d expected. A cat... Maybe that was just how Minho was ? Capable of attracting nearby cats ? He’d never thought that’d be something he’d one day be grateful for, and yet here they were. This cat would be the key to a good night’s sleep, guaranteed, with the purring soothing him and the warmth... Again, warmth helping him feel safe. Maybe it wasn’t so bad.

[5:26 pm]

“ You lost all the footage ? All of it ? “

The seven boys were glaring. Ouch, that kind of hurt, didn’t it ? While not all of them were as serious as Chan, it was kind of hard on Jisung... Lying to everyone like that, could they do it ?

“ Oh, we sure did, “ he responded with that good ol’ fake confident smile, maintaining eye contact to the extreme, “ we’re all out of footage for the day ! “

“ Yeah, cameras said there was no space left before we were done filming and deleted everything stored in it. Sorry. “

Apparently, Minho could do it better than him without much trouble.

“ But instead, I’ve got something even better !”

Lo and behold, there’s a fucking cat in his coat ! Gasps coming from the younger boys and Changbin, Woojin aww-ing and Chan having to give it to him, getting a cat out of an investigation was pretty cool, the proud look on Minho’s face could not be more relieving to his more anxious friend.

“ I’m taking her home by the way, but I’ll let Jisung pick the name with me - don’t be too jealous, I’ll send you videos of her. “

They’d gotten one good thing out of this night. Jisung had gotten way with lying about the ghost of that cat. And... well, they’d gotten away with deleting the footage themselves, though they didn’t review it before doing so. How unfortunate that they didn’t see the man’s ghost petting the cat while they slept - that would’ve made their day !

#stayshub #han jisung #lee minho #lee know #stray kids #stray kids drabbles #tho idk if 3k+ words really count as a drabble...#minsung #fuck if i know how to tag fics i don't !! i do not !!!#it's my first time writing as them so i'm sorry about... everything T_T

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stormyblue90 · 5 years ago

Text

rules: answer the questions in a new post and tag 10 blogs!

tagged by @avantegarda

a-age: 29....I don’t feel like it, I feel like I should be much younger.

b-birthplace: Texas

c-current time: 10:30 pm

d-drink you last had: Coke

e-easiest person to talk to: My bestie and roommate @predatorydeception

f-favorite song: Shit, I have a few. Uhhh.... Defeated by Breaking Benjamin, The Light by Disturbed, Rainbow in the Dark by Dio and uh Iron by Within Temptation.

g-grossest memory: Probably the time I was in like...5th or 6th grade, got picked up from school, came home, and our huge ass dog at the time had a bout of mild diarrhea and left a GIANT mass of steaming shit in the living room. You could smell it from nearly anywhere in the house. I’m just thankful I wasn’t the one to clean it!

h-horror yes or horror no: Nah, horror movies aren’t my thing. At least not the kind that are popular, like slasher films, or anything that’s just a pointless gore-fest/torture porno. Ugh. Give me something more along the lines of Crimson Peak. I prefer old school gothic horror.

i-in love: Pffft no. I’m aromantic! No romo!

j-jealous of people: Yeeeeeah.... I get jealous/envious of people with either better skills than mine, or skills I wish I had. But I try not to dwell on it.

l-love at the first sight or should i walk by again: Fuck no. 1. I’m aro as hell. 2. There’s no such thing as “love at first sight”. It’s just bullshit. Love, REAL selfless love, takes A LOT of time, patience, understanding, communication, growth, maturity, etc. It’s not easy, it’s work. Now you MIGHT find someone you SEEM to instantly click with, but that DOES NOT mean it’s gonna last or that it’s love.

m-middle name: Elaine.

n-number of siblings: Younger sister (half, we share the same mom), and since last March I now have two younger step-siblings. (Step-sister who hilariously has the same first name as me. Our parents have to refer to us by middle names. And a step-brother.)

o-one wish: Uhhhhh.....To have a magic notebook that whatever I write in it becomes reality. The only rules to it are that I can’t kill anyone, resurrect anyone, or make anyone fall in love. I’d use to not only improve my life but the that of others.

p-person you last called: Think it was my roomie to find out where she was.

q-question you are always asked: Uhhhh.....fuck I dunno. Outside of the usual questions at work, but I don’t count that.

r-reading anything right now?: Yep, reading The Silmarillion by J.R.R. Tolkien! The Feanorian family are my favorite hot mess right now!

s-song you last sang: I don’t/can’t sing. I mean I TRIED to see if I could sing Mirror, Mirror and This Life is Mine from the RWBY. (both great songs btw)

t-time you woke up: 7:30 am for work.

u-underwear color: I don’t fucking care. So long as they’re clean and comfy.

v-vacation destination: New Zealand. As well as different natural history museums, especially those with amazing paleontology exhibits.

w-when was the last time you really laughed?: ....Too many times to count.

x-x-rays: A few years ago on my foot. I don’t know what I did to this day to injure it, but I couldn’t put the slightest pressure on it without a surge of pain. The x-ray was to make sure nothing was broken. Thankfully there were no fractures of any kind. It was most likely a stressed/injured/sprain tendon or something. I was out of work for a week, but afterwards I was fine.

y-your favorite food: Burgers and just about anything made from potatoes. Also chocolate.

z-zodiac sign: Aquarius

I tag @predatorydeception @exotic-panda @spartan501st @crowsister @smolsarcasticraspberry @baedhros-russan-doll @eveningalchemist @lovelytimes1 @whatstolkienherepeeps @noldorin-drama

#about me

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callmehopeless · 6 years ago

Text

Merry Hopemas You Crazy Kids

On the first day of Hopemas my fanfic author friend sent to me

An opportunity to write (or draw) like crazy

Welcome, friends and comrades, to the one and only challenge that will clear your pores, bring world peace AND give you an opportunity to use that big old noggin’ of yours. It’s a fic and art challenge! We’re going to write or draw or stuff! Well, you’re going to do that. I’m going to shower you with affection and praise.

Q: But Hope, what does it all mean?

I don’t know. Nobody does. We’re all just drifting through space, searching for meaning-

Q: No, this challenge. What’s this about?

Oh! Basically: I’m going to list off some prompts here, some ideas and stuff. Each of you who want to contribute can pick a prompt, pick a character and write or draw for it! It’s just a dumb fun thing so that I can showcase to the world the beautiful fics my followers write and the art they create, give you guys some opportunity to interact with other content creators, and just celebrate my favourite time of year in style.

If your interest has been piqued (and I daresay it should be): read below the cut to check out the rules, the prompts, the characters AND who’s already writing or drawing what!

Q: Okay, okay. You have piqued my interest. Give me the rules.

THE RULES (AS BARBOSSA SAYS ‘THEY’RE MORE LIKE GUIDELINES’)

How do I enter? Give this post a quick reblog, and if you’re feeling generous, drop me a follow. Then just send me a message (preferably here so I have a copy saved and don’t lose it like an idiot) with the prompt you’d like, whether you’ll be creating art or writing, and the character you’ll be doing! If you’ve got it I’ll confirm it and tag you in this post.

When do I have to have a fic or artwork done by? There’s no due date, so go absolutely nuts. However, the ‘loose’ date is the 31st of December so we can all enjoy a smutty / fluffy / angsty start to 2019

How long should my fic be? I don’t mind whether it’s 50 words or 50,000, you crazy kid. Just make sure if it’s NSFW or longer than a few thousand words that any of the graphic or smutty stuff goes under a cut

If I decide to make fanart, what medium should it be? Bro, whatever the hell you want. Anything and everything. It can be in paint for all I care

What if I start doing it and I give up? HELP! It’s okay! Dude, life is wild. This is NO PRESSURE. If you get to the end of December and haven’t managed to get anything done, it’s fine! Shoot me a message. Life gets in the way

What genres are acceptable? Buddy, there are 0 genres that aren’t acceptable. Create what you want. Just make sure you tag everything appropriately and TW it if you’re undecided. Darkfics or raunchy artworks are welcome so long as they’re signposted

What ships do we do? Preferably reader inserts! Since this is what I write for the most part, I’m sure this community prefers reader inserts. But if you want to do a ship, drop me a message and we’ll work it out. For artists: you can draw your character singularly, or them with someone else!

But I don’t write / draw often! I’m nervous! Friend, it’s no problem at all. Don’t be nervous! Nobody here is going to be a dick to you. I’ll fight them. We are a place of wholesome love and respect

How do I submit my fic or drawing? Just post in on your profile with #MerryHopemas and drop me a tag! I’ll be reblogging everyone’s work; if I forget, harass me via pm

I have a question not listed on this rules sheet!? AAARGH! Shoot me a message and I’ll help you out! It’s okay friend.

THE CHARACTERS

Here are some of the fandoms that you can create for during this festive season:

Star Wars (Any character you like, really!), Marvel Cinematic Universe (Pretty much anyone has a green light here), X-Men (again, anyone, but double points for Peter Maximoff), Any of the characters Adam Driver has played (cause that guy’s a fucking champ), Narnia (anyone...again), Bioware (a running theme but...ANYONE. Also this one I know will require individual, non-reader ships so you’ve got a green light for whatever ships you like), Macgyver, Detroit: Become Human, Lord of the Rings (especially the Hobbit cause Kili has my heart oscillating), Game of Thrones (give me those sweet reader pairings), American Horror Story (Michael Langdon, Tate Langdon), Nines Rodriguez from VTMB (or Prince Lacroix), Harry Potter Characters in General (but double points for Marauders Era), Star Trek (Any AOS character!) and probably a few more, so check in with me if you want to do someone not on the list (har har)

THE MAIN EVENT

Alright, let’s bring home the bacon. Here are the multitude of prompts you can pick from! I’ll cross them out when they’ve been taken and tag the taker so you can shake your fist in jealousy (and check out their exciting work). So without further ado, may I present: the gorgeous options for this fic / art challenge:

1. A kiss under the mistletoe that makes me blush so hard I just have to sweep you off your feet for a second one -

2. Someone spiked the eggnog - (Fili x Reader fic) by @aredlily

3. Sneaking out of the Christmas party for time alone -

4. Cuddling when the heater breaks - (Adam Sackler x Reader fic) by @spinebarrel

5. Pretending to be dating to impress the family - (Adam Sackler x Reader) by @autumnlovesadam

6. Sharing a phone call on Christmas Eve while half the world away -

7. Giving someone an ugly handmade Christmas sweater -

8. Falling off of the ladder and into your arms while you help with the decorating -

9. I’m watching the Christmas lights switch on, but not even caring; I’m too busy looking at the way your eyes light up -

10. Uncoordinated ice skating causing them to fall into you adorably -

11. I’m heading home for Christmas, but I think my home might actually be you -

12. You bought me the most thoughtful gift, but I thought you hated me more than anything -

13. I know you hate Christmas, but trust me: this will be the best one you’ve ever had -

14. Your flight is cancelled due to the snowstorm and I know this is crazy, but stay here with me tonight -

15. You lent me your scarf to keep me warm and I fell asleep with it on because it smells just like you - (Flip Zimmerman x Reader fic) by @toytalababy

16. All of our friends are sitting around the fire with us and even though we’re not together, you keep brushing your cold fingers against mine -

17. We’re covered in icing and this gingerbread house looks like garbage but I’m so, so happy you’re here with me -

18. We’re drunkenly walking home from the pub on Christmas Eve and you throw your arm around me to keep me warm and it’s heaven - (Clyde Logan x Reader fic) by @kylosupremeren

19. You’ve just hit me with a snowball. You’re about to get a serious ass-whooping buddy

20. You still have that crappy ornament I made for you on your tree, even after all these years -

21. We’re friends who have a terrible fight on Christmas Eve and you come and find me sitting on a park bench as the snow falls -

22. You’ve got a cold and look like death but you still showed up to Christmas drinks at my house. God, I think I love you - (Paterson x Reader fic) by @abstractragedy

23. Your voice is so beautiful caroling at my door that I lost all sense of self and opened it in my underwear -

24. We’re making hot chocolate and it’s turned into a whipped cream fight in the kitchen -

25. You come to my coffee shop every day to order a gingerbread latte. I don’t think you even drink coffee? - (Loki x Reader fic) by @tinytravisty

26. We’re watching Christmas movies on your sofa and I’ve never been one for Christmas but this feels so right to me -

27. You’re my ex and we’re both at the same party; why do you keep looking at me like that when people kiss under the mistletoe? - (Adam Sackler x Reader) by @majestic-sith-queen

28. I just watched you kiss someone else under the mistletoe and I’m trying to pretend my heart isn’t breaking -

29. We’re the only single people at this Christmas party and they’re all making eyes at us like they know I’ve been in love with you for years - (Kylo Ren x Reader fic) with @jollyeyedwonder

30. I give you a lift home on Christmas Eve and we’re stuck in traffic as a romantic Christmas song comes on and oh gosh -

31. You’ve got whipped cream on your nose and I kiss it off without thinking -

SO IF YOU’VE CHOSEN A PROMPT

Reblog this post, drop me a message with whether you’d like to draw or write, your character and the prompt you’ve chosen! Hashtag your work with #MerryHopemas and tag me once you’re done. You can upload it anytime between now and December 31st!

If the prompts are filled up before then, don’t worry: I’ll add some more!

I CAN’T WAIT THIS IS GONNA BE RAD!

If you’re keen to discuss your prompt more or hang out with fellow writers: we have a discord here and I’ll pop up a channel for discussing this challenge!

Good luck and Merry Hopemas, friends!

#merryhopemas #update #updates #irl #challenge #christmas #fanfiction

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imaginetonyandbucky · 6 years ago

Note

imagine no powers au where tony is still a rich businessman and meets ptsd vet bucky when fitting his prosthetic. bucky doesnt realise tony is tony stark.

Worst Case

Summary: When Bucky applies for a program for a new type of prosthesis he doesn’t have much hope of getting into it, but then a doctor who only introduced himself as Tony turns up and flips his world upside down. Not only does he end up with a new arm but also a crush that is hard to ignore as time goes on.

Warnings: Panic Attacks

Read it on AO3

Chapter 1 of 7

James (7:32 am)“Today’s the appointment”“couldn’t sleep”

Nat (7:33 am)“Don’t punch them for trying to touch your shoulder, that’s their job.”

James (7:33 am)“That was ONE time.”“And deserved.”

Nat (7:43 am)“Good luck!”“…

James (1:14 pm)“Fuck everything.”

Nat (1:14 pm)“?”

James (1:14 pm)“I’m not eligible for the program.”“Trying hard not to cry, I’m on the bus.”

Nat (1:15 pm)“Прости, дорогая!” (I’m sorry, darling!)“What happened?”

James (1:17 pm)“They pocked and prodded me for two hours then said sorry”“too much nerve damage”“they can’t do anything”“fucking shit”“brb”“having a panic attack”

Nat (1:18 pm)“Breath, James, breath.”

Two days later…

James (9:05 am)“They just called…woke me up the damn bastards”“Want me to come in again”“*eye rolling smiley*”“guess they didn’t fuck with me enough already”(9:06am)“wanna look at the freak with the nerve damage again”“fuck them…”

Nat (9:07 am)“James…”“What did they say?”

James (9:10 am)“They wanna repeat the tests.”

Nat (9:11 am)“Doesn’t sound bad. Maybe they think you’re still eligible for a prosthesis?”

James (9:12 am)“…”“…fine.”“I’ll go.”

Nat (9:12 am)“Good boy.”

(More after the break!)

—-

The guy strode into the room like he owned the entire building.

“I’m personally offended by your nerve damage. Not by you, hot stuff, I could never be offended by someone with your face. Holy crap, do you have a weapon license for that glare, that look could kill someone.”

The man didn’t even bother to say hello. Bucky was immediately put off by his bluntness and flirtyness? and the guy didn’t stop talking. He sat down on one of those stools with wheels and rolled around the room, picking up Bucky’s file from the counter. He flipped through it, pulled a face, then dropped it with a look of disgust that made Bucky want to get up from examination chair and walk out the door. The nerve the man had, he could have just slapped him in the face, would have felt the same.

“You’re the impossible patient, I hear. People’ve been talking about you, saying what a poor guy you are with that level of amputation and nerve damage.” The man rolled up to Bucky’s left side, clasping his hands together and grinning enthusiastically. “I wanted to see that for myself. I’m Tony by the way.”

Bucky was too angry to say anything for a moment and he took a deep breath before trusting himself to speak. He sat up in the chair, ready to get up.

“I would like to go now, Dr. - ” He looked at the guy’s name tag on his lab coat.“ -Banner?”

The man had the audacity to laugh.

“I’m not Dr. Banner, I just took his coat for today, we do that sometimes. Anyway, you’re not allowed to leave until I get some results.”

“Listen, Dr. Whoeveryouare - ”

“Tony.”

“I don’t care.” Bucky pinched the bridge of his nose. “If all you want is to humiliate me further by running more tests with no results then I have no reason to stay, the other doctor made it pretty clear yesterday that I’m a fucked up case and won’t be getting a prosthesis. I can accept that, but I can’t accept that you want to put me through these fucking tests again just for your own amusement. I’m not having another panic attack so you can have a good laugh with your colleagues later. I’m leaving now.”

Bucky got up, he was shaking and unsteady on his feet, but if he could just get out of this room he could hold onto the wall and make it out of the clinic if he recalled correctly there was an alley right next to it -.

He didn’t get very far because Tony rolled in front of him with the stool and very effectively blocked his way.

“Who said anything about having a laugh. When I said results I meant results we can work with. Results that will get you a new arm.” Tony reached out and held onto Bucky’s arm, steadying him. “Sit back down please, you look like you are about to have a breakdown.”

“You’re not wrong,” Bucky mumbled, Tony’s words slowly sank in and he sat back down on the chair. He took a deep breath trying to calm himself with a long exhale. “I don’t understand. The nerve damage-”

“The nerve damage is severe, that’s true, but I’m here for the impossible cases and you fit the definition perfectly. Shoulder disarticulation, burn scars, shattered clavicle and scapula, not to mention the muscle damage and I’m guessing PTSD as well, Afghanistan?”

Bucky leaned back in the chair, closing his eyes. “Iraq.”

“You okay?” Tony’s voice was suddenly quiet, concerned, a stark contrast to his in-your-face tone earlier.

“Okay enough.”

Bucky heard Tony rolling around, pulling something heavier towards them and making some noise, his best guess was that Tony was readying the machine the other doctor had already used to test the nerve reaction in his stump. He didn’t know why Tony thought he was going to get a different result than two days ago, but he also had no idea how this machine worked in the first place.

“Why me?”

“Whaff?” Tony sounded like he had something in his mouth and Bucky cracked open an eye just to confirm that the man had a screwdriver between his teeth, he had both his hands in the wiring of the machine and was doing …something to it.

“What the hell?”

“Just a sec, almost got it. Should be able to get some more sensitivity out of this thing.” Tony dropped the screwdriver from his mouth, caught it and stuck it into the machine in one smooth move. “Don’t worry, I designed this thing. I know what I’m doing.” Something inside the scanner made a whining noise and a mischievous grin spread over Tony’s face. “Done, now strip.”

Tony loosely fitted the covering back onto the machine and turned to Bucky who was still speechless.

“Strip, or do you want me to stick the electrodes on your shirt?”

“Why me?” Bucky repeated again. “Why go through all that effort for me?”

“Because,” Tony sorted through the cables of the electrodes, casually getting everything ready for testing, “when I get this technology to work with you, Mr. Impossible-Nerve-Damage, I can get this to work with everybody.”

“You sound like you invented this thing yourself.”

Tony stalled minutely in his movements but soon continued to untangle the cables. “I was part of the team, it’s an issue of personal pride. Now, do I have to buy you dinner first before you undress?” He flashed a cocky grin at Bucky.

Bucky didn’t know why taking off his shirt was so difficult for him right now, Tony had certainly seen the pictures in his files, and he had done it with the other doctor two days ago, but that one had been cold to him, almost sterile, and with the remnants of an almost break down at the back of his mind Bucky didn’t feel comfortable exposing his scars.

The flirting didn’t help.

While Bucky was still trying to get the courage to pull off his shirt he heard Tony roll around the room again and then he suddenly had a blanket in his lap. One of those white emergency blankets that the clinic kept in the cupboards and nobody had ever touched before.

“You can cover up after I applied the electrodes, no need for you to be uncomfortable. And I’m not judging, I can assure you that.”

Bucky nodded. He swallowed, then shrugged out of the hoodie he was wearing. He needed another second before he pulled off his shirt. The cold air on his shoulder was uncomfortable, the scar tissue was still sensitive there, still red and irritated even after all these months. He knew it would take time till he would be completely healed, his stump at least, not like he was going to grow a new arm.

“Can you lie a bit on your side?” Tony was adjusting the backseat of the chair and put it up a bit. “I need to get to your backside for a moment, then you can lie on your back.”

Bucky did as he was told.

“I guess you know how these work, so just relax.”

“You say it like it’s easy.” Bucky huffed. He involuntarily twitched when Tony touched him. The skin on his fingertips felt rough on Bucky’s sensitive skin, but Tony worked quickly and efficiently, not touching him more than was necessary. Unlike the other doctor who had been fumbling with the electrodes forever before he had glued them to Bucky’s stump. With soft pressure on his shoulder, Tony guided him onto his back and then applied the electrodes to his chest and side.

“Okay, that’s it. You can cover up.” Tony turned back to the machine and started pressing buttons on the screen, Bucky unfolded the blanket and threw it over himself, it made him feel a little better about the situation. Not as exposed as the last time and also not freezing from the AC. Now he just had to wait… and hope, still he was extremely tense.

“Are you okay over there?” Tony suddenly asked and Bucky gave him a questionable look. “I feel like you’re having a moment. You’re breathing pretty hard.”

“I’m fine.” Bucky pressed. “Just…nervous. Already gave up on this whole thing and then you waltz in and turn everything upside down.”

“Yeah, that’s what I do.” He smirked then turned back to the device and fiddled with it, Bucky knew he was running certain programs to measure nerve activity or whatever. Last time most of the appointment had been taken up by the very lengthy explanation of the whole procedure, the measuring itself had only taken a few minutes. When he heard Tony sigh he knew it was already over. He prepared himself for walking out of the door like the other day, feeling utterly broken.

“Initial readings are really crappy, I can see how Dr. Richards thought you couldn’t be worked with,” Tony mumbled.

That was that. Bucky sat up, letting the blanket fall onto his lap. He reached for his shirt and started on untangling it.

“Woah there, what are you doing?”

“Getting dressed again. I’m guessing we’re done here…”

“You’re guessing wrong, hotshot.”

Bucky looked at Tony like he had just grown a second head. “But the results are crap.”

“The initial results are crap, but I’m not done yet. Get comfortable, put on some music, this is going to take a while.” With that, Tony turned back to the device and left Bucky sitting with his mouth hanging open. After Tony didn’t say anything else and just continued with his work Bucky laid back down, eventually, he also pulled out his phone and started to listen to some music.

James (7:48 pm)“That took FOREVER!”“I’m pretty sure Tony is a mad scientist”

Nat (7:49 pm)“What happened? Have you been in the hospital until now?”

James (7:50 pm)“Got out like half an hour ago dude wouldn’t let me go”“There was an actual fire in the device he kept poking around in it”“Thought the guy wanted to electrocute me more than once!”“The noises it made!!!”James (7:51 pm)“He wants me to come back tomorrow”“There were zero results today”“nothing”“my nerves are fucked and still he wants me to come in”“Can’t believe this guy”

Nat (7:53 pm)“He sounds determined…”

James (7:54 pm)“He sounds crazy! Insisted I call him Tony and he kept flirting with me!”“Should tell you how insane he really is”

Nat (7:55 pm)“James, you’re not as bad as you think you are”“A doctor flirting with his patient is a bit …weird though”

James (7:56 pm)“yeah… don’t know what to think about him”“taking a book tomorrow”“and some food”

Nat (7:57 pm)“Good idea”

James (11:43 pm)“He’s cute though *winky smiley*”

Nat (11:44 pm)“ffs! James!”

#winteriron #tony x bucky #tony stark #bucky barnes #no powers au #amputee bucky #natasha romanov #pepper potts #prompts #james prince #Anonymous

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jackjames-exe · 6 years ago

Note

How are you today? 💕

Okay lets do this. Trigger warnings are in the tags.

(I started writing this before the vid came out so I decided to keep the original first part)

Oh my gods today has been so awful and it‘s barely even 4 pm.

My sisters (older one) friend decided to tell my mom things my younger sister and I told her in confidence. For me it was that I’ve thought of suicide and I’ve researched it once or twice on a bad day. Instead of being sad and wanting to talk she decided to get mad and slap me (it didn’t hurt really but still) and she yelled at me about how I have no right to feel suicidal. Her reason was that I have a lot, a computer (and laptop) I payed for with my uni money and my phone I helped pay for. I will say she gives me a lot, she’s paying my phone bill (and my phone in increments) and I (this is where I stopped) feel awful about making her think I’m not grateful for it, I really am. But I’m still depressed.

She decided that the way to prove I’m not actually suicidal or to show me I’m conflicting (I’m not quite sure why or which one) she decided to rush me and grab my throat (not enough to hurt me, just enough to have her hands around my neck and to put pressure on my windpipe, so just enough to scare me) but yea I obviously jumped and got scared because my mother is about to like choke me or some shit. She let go explained that I want to kill myself but I get scared when my throat is grabbed or I’m grabbed in general? Like that means I’m not actually suicidal.

Then she started asking me why and I said I feel useless and worthless and she asked if anyone had ever told me that, I said she has (because shes said it when angry) she got pissed. She told me to think about whether she has ever actually told me I’m worthless and left the room, I followed and we continued our argument. (I added this part for context)

She seems to think that just because I don’t talk about my problems that they dont exist. Which is dumb. She started lecturing me about the fact shes done a lot for me and she thought she was doing great before she found out I was depressed and now that she knows I’m suicidal too she feels like a failure and told me that she will book herself into the hospital so yea. I really do love her and appreciate her and she wont let me talk or listen to what I’m saying because she thinks that there’s no way I appreciate her if I dont do anything.

I told her I feel like a waste of space and like I don’t do anything and she said thats cus its true and yea shes right but still. Anyway so yea I told her I have no motivation and she said that I obviously do because I go on my phone and my computer so I just don’t want to do things for her because I don’t appreciate or cherish her, so yea that was fun. It kept going like that, me trying to explain and then her yelling and telling me I’m wrong about my own emotions and that I feel nothing for her.I got mad and asked her in tears to just let me talk

(I was crying the whole time which she got mad about because I wouldn’t explain in detail why, like the conversation and situation wasn’t upsetting and cus she kept getting mad at me I would force myself to stop and then when she insulted or got annoyed angry or whatever at me I’d start crying again)

So anyway I asked her to let me talk and she rushed at me gripped my hair and started getting more pissed saying that me saying sorry doesn’t do or tell her shit. And it kept going like that. She wouldn’t listen. She learned nothing other than the fact that the reason I haven’t ended it all yet was because I believed it would be a burden for someone to find me and have to deal with the consequences of that situation.

She got mad about that and later in the argument told me that I cause a lot of shit already from not doing anything so there was no point in that being a reason.And she also told me that I could go to a friend of mine who has taken psych classes about my issues and if shes really my friend I should feel comfortable with that. That isn’t even how friends work first of all and when I tried to tell her that I didn’t wanna get Becca (the friend) into my life and vent to her, she got angry AGAIN. Like the whole argument was me trying to explain my feelings, her getting mad and telling me I only care about myself so I was wrong and me arguing back and then her getting mad and getting in my face or getting physical or saying she’s a failure and she’s gonna leave us to our own devices while she goes to the hospital. She has pain, a lot of physical pain and she’s depressed too and stuff so she said it’d be easier on her anyway because (and I know this but she wont let us learn, she just gets pissed and yells at us and throws things while explaining how to do it right when we mess things up, which according to her is only because we don’t want to try, we can do it we just choose not to) (fun fact I actually planned on cleaning my room completely but she yelled at me so that got rid of a lot of hours I could have been doing that and made my mood awful. I’m still going to but now I’m just extremely upset)

So yea. She also brought back my past mistakes. When I was a kid I was fucking stupid and I made dumb decisions. One of which was to be upset because some people my sisters and I were hanging with weren’t hanging out with me or letting me play so in a fit of anger and will to be payed attention to I said I’d kill myself. At the time I was actually an okay kid but I got bullied a lot and I had like no friends so I was lonely and I didn’t want the few people who spoke to me to leave and I over reacted obviously not knowing the consequences. She took me to a therapist who asked questions. I said I was fine and since my mom and sister (older) both said I wasn’t fine apparently (i had just been told this today) they had to go to therapy classes to deal with the fact they were wrong. When I tried to tell her that I was just a stupid 11 year old kid she told me I wasn’t because I convinced a doctor I was fine? But I really was fine. I only started not to be because of all the consequences of that decision and growing up with no friends and being yelled at or bullied by my sisters eventually made me believe everything they’d made me feel and I ended up as I have been the past like 6 years. Yep.

But she calmed down and now she’s in a good ish mood I guess so I’m not being yelled at anymore and I got to watch Jack’s video! Now I’m sitting on my couch trying to work through my anxiety to call up my doctor so I can make an appointment to get help of some sort.

The worst thing is she is a great person, she’s really kind and fun to be around. But she’s just so stressed and tired and in pain. We’re really poor so she has difficulty with paying bills and getting food and she’s given up a lot for us and it seems like we just don’t care but I really love her and I listen to her and I wish I didn’t have such bad anxiety and depression, I wish I had the motivation I need to get up and do things around the house like she needs but I just. I can’t. Things are a lot and I can barely get up as it is. I know I need help and I want to get help and stuff. It’s just hard when I think about the fact I need to call and tell a person that I want an appointment and then go to it, possibly alone or with my mom and talk about everything or why I need help. I’m just scared so much. I don’t want to just burst into tears or make things confusing/stressful for the nurse or doctor. My mind is a lot.

So yea that is my day so far. I finished this at 6:35 pm. And yea.

#asks and answers #in asks im always gonna tell the complete truth now #anon asks #my day so far #trugger warning #trigger warnings #tw suicude #tw depression #tw anxeity #tw arguments

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japanandkoreastopgivingmeships · 7 years ago

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Jaesuk/Janiel Fanfic Contest

It’s been awhile, so I decided to make another one. I basically just copied and pasted everything from what I published on Wattpad.

Before I tell you the rules, this contest is for writers who have the main ship as Jaesuk/Janiel. If they aren't the main ship, then this, sadly, isn't for you. I can always make another contest for you if you think this is unfair. If they are at least one of the main ships, then that's okay too—just say so in your description.

If you have any questions after reading the rules, I'll gladly answer them.

Like the previous event, it'd be appreciated if you spread the word! You don't have to, though.

Rules:

For Both Readers and Writers: Please do not diss someone else's fanfiction for whatever reason. If the person is dissing you, please ignore them. Though, don't indulge them either.

If the writer decides to add another ship other than Jaesuk, please don't hate on them. Also, writers, please warn your readers if you're going to have any other ship than Jaesuk. There are only a few exceptions:

1. People are misunderstanding and there really isn't a thing going on between them. This has to be a legit misunderstanding.

2. If the writer unintentionally put in the ship, ask them if they are planning on making it a ship; if not, they don't have to warn readers, though please mention a light ship or something along those lines.

There can be other exceptions, just ask me and I'll give you a yes or a no.

Submissions: You can put as many stories as you want for Lookism. This is to make more fanfictions for the fandom, so feel free to add as many stories as you want. You can add up to 1 to 50 if you wanted (I don't think any of you guys would, though).

Unlike the previous contest, you'll have to submit a fanfic that you haven't published yet.

There are some exceptions:

If your fanfic has less than ten votes, feel free to join.

If your fanfic was posted a week before the contest date (but not more than a week ago), feel free to join (even if you have more than ten votes).

If you wrote a fanfic for the previous fanfic, but you never got the chance to join, I'll be nice and let you join.

If you wrote a fanfic and wanted to join the next contest, but it took too long, then it's only fair if I let you join.

Please don't lie just so you can put a fanfic on here with a lot of votes, making you more likely to win (not saying that any of you guys would, though).

Inspiration: This isn't a rule... If you need help with actually writing the fanfiction and/or need someone to inspire you, feel free to ask for inspiration from me! I'll gladly help make you feel like writing the fanfiction. I'll even gladly help you with ideas! That and I just like sharing ideas. If not, you can completely ignore the inspiration paragraph and pretend it doesn't exist.

Eligibility and Restrictions: This contest is open to all countries. To be a part of this, you must be at least 13 years old. I hope you guys don't mind that I will also be joining this contest as well!

Methods of Entry: You can enter the contest by linking it in the comment section and tagging it as #lookismJanielcontest or #lookismJaesukcontest. Copy and paste your story in the comment section and tag it to make it easier to find your story (our fandom is kind of small, so please do both). Please only do one of the two tags. Depending on if you use English or Korean names, use the one you're planning on using in your fanfic. Please comment on this chapter for your submission. If you forget to do something, I will gladly remind you on your fanfiction or PM you!

I need an opinion on some things:

1. If there are any people who want the English and Korean names to be two separate contests, please tell me.

If you want it to be the same contest, please tell me.

If you don't care, please tell me.

2. Do you want this contest to be available on other fanfiction sites? I've heard some people want it to be available for Ao3 (Archive of Our Own), but I'm not sure how I'll do that exactly.

3. If you want it on Ao3, should we make it a separate contest? Ao3 has a different voting style than Wattpad, so it'll be hard to determine how the writers can win. If there are two contests, should we let them enter both contests? Please give me your opinion.

You'll know if you did it right if I add you to my, "Lookism Candidates: Jaesuk/Janiel 1." From Wattpad.

If you did it right, and I didn't add you, please PM me or comment that I didn't add you!

Content: Since this fandom is small (which is weird since this manhwa is amazing), and this contest was made to make more fanfictions, all categories and ratings are acceptable. The stories can be as long as a one-shot to a long multi-chaptered one (it can be as long as you want). You can make it an AU fanfic or as canon to the manhwa as possible. Honestly, I think the readers will appreciate anything you write for Lookism.

If the fanfic reading language is not in English (it's in Spanish or something), you are still welcome to join (this is to make the fanfictions increase, after all).

If you want to write a ship that isn't Jaesuk, please leave a warning. If you decide to make a fanfic where the main ship isn't Jaesuk, this contest is not for you. If it's among the main ships, it's fine. Again, just warn people.

Also, if you're one of those people who posts pictures instead of writing on Wattpad, feel free to do that instead (if you want)! However, there's only one thing you need to remember and do. You need to state the person who made it, whether you were the one who made it or you found it somewhere online. If you don't this, you won't be included in the contest, sorry!

Before I forget, the fanfiction does NOT have to be completed to join. I repeat, the fanfiction does NOT have to be completed. That way it'll be less pressuring, and you'll be able to continue the fanfiction even if the contest is done.

You can choose any version of Lookism you want, whether that's the Webtoon (English names) or the one with their original names.

You can have OCs in your story too! Please state that you have an OC in your story, though.

Deadline: The contest will start at December 4, 2017, but you can submit your fanfictions in at any time (after this day until the due date).

The contest will end on January 5, 2018 at 6:00 PM (Mountain Daylight Time). If the contest isn't getting at least 10 submissions, the contest will end on a later date. If it seems like a close tie between two fanfictions, both of them will get the prize. This will be the end date unless I happen to change my mind or some of the readers/writers want more time.

If I happen to change the end date or time, I will post another chapter stating the new end date/time. If not, I will post a chapter to state the winner.

Prizes: Since I didn't plan a prize yet, feel free to volunteer as the prize giver!

Judging: The judges will be the readers. Whoever can get the most votes on their fanfiction will win! If you're doing this on Ao3 (if we end up accepting that), we'll have to think of a way to see how the winning process works.

Good luck, and I hope you can make this fandom feel happy with all the fanfictions (for Lookism) you write!!

#lookism needs more fans #lookismJaesukcontest #lookismJanielcontest #janiel #jaesuk #jaeseok #contest

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