#in my defence the first bbs one is one i already had but it has text on it. but i've never posted it. | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

alyss01 · 4 years ago

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hihi! i thought abt this last night, but i fell asleep before typing jt lol-

so, non comfy cartel ask bc i'm dumb no plot

so just regular bb sykunno lol

alright now- reader lives with sykunno, no one knows this. reader says they have a boyfriend, and no one knows who it is. they also have explicitly said that they don't have corpse merch. so they're streaming, wearing sykunno's corpse merch, and sykunno peeks his head in after he did all of his among us tasks after being killed first and goes to hug them and be very clingy bc i feel like clingy-kunno would be so fricken cute, and then since proximity, he says, while chat's freaking out, something along the lines of 'can i have my hoodie back baby?' and everyone in the proximity just goes dead fricken silent and then reader and syk start laughing and explain themselves.

<33 have a good day!!

|[Relationship reveal]|

[Sykkuno x GN! reader]

-------------------------------------

Genre: fluff

Word count: 1.3K

Requested: yes

Synopsis: When you’re streaming among us, Sykkuno comes in to see you in his Corpse hoodie. Your relationship with him gets revealed and he stayes with you through the rest of the stream.

Warnings: 1 curse word, other than that just fluff

A/n: so guess who accidentally deleted the written one shot when it was nearly done? ..... I tried to write it again as accurately as the first time but I’m sorry for the hold up. I’m always down for some Sykkuno fluff though. Why do I feel like i only just figured out that's it's spelled Sykkuno instead of Sykunno??

Masterlist

-------------------------------------------

You started up stream, greeting the people that streamed into the chat as you explained that you would stream among us for a bit with Toast's lobby.

It was hard to keep up with the chat as it raced past, your eyes scanning the messages as they raced by.

Multiple people noted on the black hoodie you wore. The black fabric with the red print was easily recognisable as they asked if your corpse hoodie had finally come in.

It had become somewhat of an inside joke within your community, you often complained that the post office was screwing you over on purpose because your hoodie was the last to come in out of all your friend group.

"Yea, I guess you could say that" you addressed it with a small smile on our face, entirely forgetting to change out of Sykkuno's hoodie you had pulled on that morning.

Leaving the topic what it was, you joined the among us lobby and discord call.

You could see that Sykkuno had also already arrived in the little space ship, a Corpse mask on his little avatar as he stood beside him.

A small grin formed on your face as you selected the green striped scarf for your little avatar to wear.

In the meantime you watched chat with a side eye before you'd have to stop reading as the round begun. You muted yourself in the discord call as you thanked some new subs and donators.

The chat flashed with questions about your boyfriend, you had announced your relationship only recently but left the identity of him in the dark.

Your fans didn't know it was Sykkuno yet, but the two of you had decided it would be alright to reveal your relationship relatively soon, the fans were bound to find out one way or another and both of you preferred it being on your own terms.

The game started as you wished the others luck, clicking away the chat as you focussed on your tasks around the spaceship.

Sykkuno's little avatar walked away with Corpse to another part of the spaceship as you joined Rae with her tasks.

It was quite a peaceful round in your opinion, you ended up sharing a lot of tasks with Rae so you walked almost the entire time with each other.

The two of you talked about the food you'd be ordering after the game, discussing different cuisines and deciding on your favourites and comparing them with one another.

That peace however was disturbed as a meeting was called, teleporting you to the meeting room. You looked to see who had died, only to see the small avatar of Sykkuno crossed out at the bottom of the screen.

"Who could do such a thing!" You gasped loudly as your group started discussing.

You accused Corpse since you had seen them leave dropship together, "We split up at medbay, it could've literally been anyone."

"His body was in specimen." Toast pointed out.

"Could've been a self-report." Rae continued as the two of you vouched for one another.

“If its in specimen and Corpse left Sykkuno in medbay, then it has to be an older kill right?” Lily asked as the rest of you hummed in response.

Sykkuno could hear your bickering as he approached your streaming room. He had died relatively early in the round and had enough time as a ghost to finish his tasks.

He knocked softly on your door, in response to Rae's newest argument you hummed in agreement.

Sykkuno opened the door in response, you couldn't see him approach but as he wrapped his arms around your shoulders from behind you couldn't help but lean back into his touch.

"So there my hoodie went, I was looking for it." You pecked his cheek from the side as he rested his head on your shoulder.

Neither of you had expected the mic to pick up his words, but the way the among us lobby silenced immediately had said enough.

"Wait what the fuck? Is Sykkuno unmuted?" Lily was the first to break the silence.

Chuckles escaped your mouth as you started laughing, leaning back into your chair and into Sykkuno's hold as you laughed louder.

Beside you Sykkuno grew red as he realized what had happened, awkward chuckles joining yours as you explained to the group what was going on.

By then the meeting had ended, teleporting you back to the meeting room where you could hear your friends loudly talk over one another.

A smile was plastered on your face as you quickly turned around, pulling up a chair beside you for Sykkuno so he could stay in your room for at least the current game.

You couldn't see chat because of among us, but you knew they were most likely going insane at the news.

Sykkuno sat down beside you, his arm snaking around your waist as he pecked your cheek. As you handed him a secondary set of earphones that laid on your desk and connected them to your desktop, you repositioned your microphone to hang in between the two of you.

When your friends had congratulated you and calmed down you went on with the game, staying by Corpse's side this time as he spoke up, "So that hoodie was Sykkuno's all along"

"In my defence, it was cold and the sweater was warm. Simple math." He chuckled as Sykkuno laid his head on your shoulder, watching your monitor with a small smile on his face.

"I could've kept your hoodie behind as well and delivered it with Sykkuno's," he stopped mid-sentence as his avatar stopped moving as well, "wait but how come I didn’t see you when I brought Sykkuno's merch over?"

Sykkuno was faster to answer him as he spoke up from beside you, softly pulling you tighter against him, "Y/n went out with friends that day, didn't want to make you uncomfortable or overwhelmed or anything."

Corpse laughed softly, making a smile form both your and Sykkuno's face as you continued your tasks, "It would've been fine, but thank you for being so considerate."

You pulled Sykkuno's hand on the mouse on your desk so he could control the character on the screen partially so you could wrap your arm over his shoulder as your hand found his hair.

Your fingers tangled between the locks on the back of his head, gently messaging his scalp as a small satisfied smile formed on his face at the gesture.

"Don’t mention it, if anything you'll now have an excuse to come over again." Corpse chuckled at your joke as Sykkuno finished your tasks while you walked the character around.

It took you a few hours to finish your stream, Sykkuno by your side the entire time as he hadn't been streaming anyway, only leaving briefly to leave the lobby on his own computer.

Your hand was clasped in his as you finished the stream, saying goodbye to your chat before going offline. Leaning back in your chair, Sykkuno brushed some hair out of your face with his free hand.

"How much do you want to bet that Twitter is blowing up right now?" you warily eyed your phone which laid screen down on the side of your desk.

A small laugh escaped his lips as he hand left yours, instead cupping your cheek and gently positioning your head to face him, "No matter what Twitter says, we'll be fine."

You gave him a small smile, "I know, I know," streams were exhausting and you couldn’t wait to just be able to hang on the couch with your boyfriend, "I'm glad it's out there. Now we won't have to be so secretive about everything anymore."

Sykkuno stood up, pulling you along with him and guiding you to your living room, "we can just order take out and chill today?"

You nodded your head, smiling at how well Sykkuno knew you by now, "I love you" you muttered as he pulled you onto the couch, other hand grabbing the remote to turn your tv on.

"I love you too."

#one shot #fluff #romance #x gn reader #x reader #sykkuno #sykkuwu #sykkuno fluff #sykunno #sykkuno x reader #sykkuno imagine #gender neutral mc #gender neutral reader #gender neutral character #fanfic #sykkuno fanfic

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silverbastardgoldenfool · 4 years ago

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Realm of the Quarantine Reread End-of-Book Questionnaire: Royal Assassin

Any differences between your first/previous reading experience and this one?

Not as stark a difference as with Assassin’s Apprentice, but definitely still there. Apart from all the obvious stuff, like feeling much more attached to the characters already and picking up more details, I think the biggest change was a complete lack of patience for the teen romance drama lol. There was a decent period where I was feeling quite frustrated with it. Not that I loved it the first time round, but back then I had a very different view of how it fit into the story. I saw it as teaching Fitz a depressing lesson of what it really means to be a royal bastard and a king’s man. Fitz’s literal need (for all he knows he would have been killed if not for his deal with Shrewd) and sense of duty to put his loyalty to his king and country first creates a relationship that is toxic, turbulent and built on lies. And teenage horniness masquerading as love. I saw all that the first time and thought it was just something he had to go through. Now I know it’s something he never really goes through but rather grips onto, romanticises and ultimately goes back to. I know the point of that is meant to be that he finally gets to have something for himself, but why it had to be Molly specifically??? I have very few qualms with Robin’s writing choices overall, but why she chose to write their relationship this way if they really are meant to be is beyond me, especially when so many of her other romances are written so well - it feels like it can’t possibly be unintentional. For most of this book they’re either fighting or fucking and honey! That ain’t love! Hell, Fitz all but sees her as just another demand on his time as the book goes on. But he can’t let her go because she’s the one thing he can point to that makes him feel normal. Not happy, not cherished, not safe. Normal. She’s simply a refuge from his real life. He literally says to Chade “I need her.” I find that so telling, man. It’s not really about her, which is a shame because Molly is great. They’re just really not good for each other.

So yeah. It’s just kind of trying to read all the Fitz/Molly stuff when you know and don’t like what it ultimately culminates in. At the same time… Bee… So I will always be conflicted lol. I just can’t separate the events of Royal Assassin from the furious disappointment I felt when I finished Fool’s Fate. Perhaps I’ll have a new Fool’s Fate experience this time that will make the next re-read a bit easier in regards to Fitz and Molly? But I won’t bet on it lol.

Anyway. It’s not as if I haven’t already said just about everything there possibly is to say about Fitz and Molly yet I also feel like I could go on about it forever. Luckily this is kind of as bad as it gets in terms of how much “screen time” they actually get (apart from Fool’s Assassin maybe? But they don’t bother me too much in that) so yay! I made it! And hopefully it’ll be a good few books before y’all have to endure my ranting about it again :)) Also hopefully this doesn’t give the impression that this read was more bad than good? It was mostly just a particular angsty chunk before they properly get together that was a bit of a slog to get through, but overall I really loved reading this book again and got a lot out of it.

Something you can’t believe you forgot

That Molly punches Fitz in the face hard enough that he bleeds and that Fitz fully intended to punch the Fool for asking if Molly was preggo before seeing he had already been beaten. I pretend I do not see it.

Favourite character introduction moments/scenes

Omfg I was just about to say “huh we didn’t really get any major character intros in this book” bitch Nighteyes???? But in my defence I just. Cannot process the fact that Nighteyes is only really in 3 of 16 books he just feels omnipresent to me BUT his introduction is most definitely iconique and god I love him and he made me cry eight thousand times!

Favourite character arcs

Speaking of Nighteyes: what a glow up. He goes from angry, scared, untrusting little bb to……. Nighteyes. Like. How does one even describe the kind of person Nighteyes becomes. He’s just Nighteyes and I love him with all my fuckin heart!! He is Fitz’s constant… He is wise… He is silly… a comedic genius…… a big, open, unconditional heart. Incomparable. I can’t believe I’ve seen ppl saying they dislike/d Nighteyes……. Honey…… it’s called taste xx

Favourite quote/s

Again no tabs so it’s a bit harder to keep track but there were a few that stuck out enough to copy down. There are a lot of iconic quotes in this book that get shared a lot so I only bothered with ones I didn’t remember.

- “I wince to think of the price willingly paid for loving me.”

- “My soft, clean bed beckoned, like a soft, clean tomorrow.” (mood)

- “I looked and saw they were both made of hungers, like containers made of emptiness.”

Favourite relationships

Kettricken/Verity obviously. I was shocked by how little time they actually have together being in love before Verity leaves??? Because all I remembered was how strong their love is. But the whole journey towards that love is what makes it stand out as an actual compelling story in its own right. This is definitely one of Robin’s greatest skills as a writer; giving the minor characters depth by giving them their own relationships that grow and change and have a life of their own outside of Fitz. It makes the world feel so much more alive.

Also Burrich/Fitz in this book continues to be bittersweet, but with a lot more sweet in there than usual! They fully start out this book as a team. Burrich calling Fitz “FitzChivalry” makes me fuckin emo and idk why even. Burrich does seem to start seeing Fitz a lot more as his own person in this book which changes their dynamic in some rly nice ways. The fact that towards the end of the book Burrich even uses the wit to help Fitz is enough to make me cry tbh - and writing this has made me realise that I’m officially past any uncomplicated good times between Burrich and Fitz y’all mind if I fuckin die real quick!!

Fitz/Verity is soy pure and beautiful. Fitz and the Fool is always, always compelling and complex and tender and perfectly mysterious. But overall you’d have to say Fitz/Nighteyes, hey? They are literally meant to be, in a way so straightforward and undeniable and beautifully simple that I never really know what to say about it. Little brother!!! :’) They literally make me cry all the frickin time lol rip!

Favourite setting

There aren’t that many to choose from in this book! Ima go with the skill river bc hey, Robin’s magic systems are so unique and beautiful and the fact that the skill is written as a kind of a place is really frickin cool and deserves a shoutout.

Favourite chapter

The final chapter (not the epilogue) ummm broke my heart but it is written so beautifully, oh my god, it’s like an out of body experience. I feel like this is kind of when RotE becomes RotE - the first time it really goes to that place that is so fitting yet so unexpected, so beautiful, so tragic, so awful, so visceral. Making use of the genre to really test the limits of humanity; to see how far you can bend a person without breaking them and then refusing to turn away from the consequences. Idk man!! I don’t know how to describe it without sounding like a pretentious dick but it really is that intense and strange and overwhelming for me. There is something in that moment, when Burrich pulls Fitz’s body out of the earth and Fitz/Nighteyes is recoiling from it and deeply terrified… Something about the enormity of the existential questions raised converging with the pinpoint specificity of it all being wrapped up in the story of a character that feels so real and who you care about so deeply… It’s almost written like a horror scene, but that’s not quite the feeling. It’s just the RotE feeling; there are multiple throughout all five series, and it’s what makes these books unlike any other.

Most loved character

Fitz, Nighteyes, the Fool all had my entire heart this book. The Fool is just so sad and pathetic and literally must be protected!! I think I’m kind of obsessed with Burrich? Also I think I almost forgot how much I love Kettricken? She’s a complete badass of course but she’s also got the biggest goddamn heart like…. Who said she was allowed to be such a beautiful person???

But god, everyone. I love them all.

Most hated character

What can I say? Regal is disgostang. Wall Ass a close second.

Raise your hand if you’ve been personally victimised by Robin Hobb (most heartbreaking and/or visceral moments)

Shall I list just a few? :)

- Burrich screaming at Fitz through the bars of his jail cell, horrible things you can’t help but feel are at least a little bit true

- Burrich sobbing over Fitz’s dead body repeating, “You aren’t dead, you aren’t dead.”

- Fitz going to Nighteyes before everything went down on the night of the coronation and just fuckin hugging him really tight

- Fitz trying desperately to leave his broken vessel behind but not quite being able to disown his body

- The Fool being beaten

- The Fool being beaten again

- The Fool sprawled and weeping across Shrewd’s dead body

- The Fool really believing for a moment that Fitz had betrayed him and killed Shrewd

- Fitz tending the Fool’s wounds………. bitch….

- Chade giving Fitz a chance to escape with them and Fitz going to kill Serene and Justin instead

- Idk why this is even that sad but Nighteyes saying the only person he loves is Fitz!

- The entire incident with the forged ones literally tearing apart a three year old girl, which I had completely blocked out until now :)

- The fact that Fitz continues to be reminded and traumatised by this incident for the remainder of the book beCAUSE HE IS A GOOD BOY. A VERY GOOD BOY WITH A VERY GOOD HEART.

- Fitz repelling at Nighteyes to try and force their bond broken

- LITTLE BROTHER

- WOLVES HAVE NO KINGS

- High off his face Fitz calling Patience “mother” no shut the fuck up!!!!

Details, observations, spoilery notes made with the benefit of the full picture

- I’ve been trying for ages to decipher when the Fool started falling for Fitz, and I think I’m officially putting my money on their last interaction in AA. “I wish I had a place that was as much me as that place is you.” I mean. If someone said that to me… I’m not a slut but who knows, ya know? (I know this is more a note for the last book but I thought of it while reading this book. So shh.)

- It’s so clear to see this time how much Fitz’s sense of self and politics are affected by his time in the Mountains. He obviously feels much more inclined to their way of thinking about royalty and sacrifice and equality and returns to Buckkeep with a self-respect he’s never really had before. Weird how being among people who don’t just think of you as The Bastard will do that.

- It’s no wonder Fitz becomes so fixated on Molly; he literally has almost nothing else to occupy him and no companionship when she suddenly shows up

- It’s gross that he spies on her, obviously, but you can’t not take into account the fact that Chade has been teaching him since he was ten that this is justifiable behaviour; a reasonable way to gather information and get what you want. Fitz’s lack of social awareness goes further than him just being a little awkward; he has literally been trained to believe the only thing wrong with stalking would be getting caught.

- I’ve seen a few people talk about the fact that Regal isn’t appropriately punished as if it’s bad writing and like, while it is frustrating, it is supposed to be frustrating - it is not a plot hole. It made sense to me the first time I read it and it was even more obvious this time; Regal has the loyalty of the inland duchies. If he were to be publicly punished those dukes would rally behind him and raise hell, and Regal would no longer need to play the part of the dutiful prince. Even if Regal died a “natural” death - something I can’t see Shrewd or Verity orchestrating anyway - the inland dukes would feel that they no longer have a Farseer on their side and may, again, raise hell. It’s a delicate balance that would be outrageously difficult not to topple if you removed Regal from the equation. There is a lot more to it than I’ll bother writing here but yeah. I don’t really know how people can read this book and think that Regal retaining his life and position is some sort of lazy plot contrivance. It was all set up in the first book dude.

- Fitz and Nighteyes meeting in this book is the perfect metaphor for our need for connection versus the fear of inevitable loss. Fitz’s experience tells him that entering into a bond with an animal can only end in pain, yet he can’t resist it. In real life this is especially true with humans and our animal companions, since they almost always have a shorter lifespan than us; signing up to love them is signing up to lose them. But the same is also true of our relationships with other humans. And like Fitz, we have all had our fair share of loss and pain. We all have our reasons to be afraid of the connection we naturally crave. Sometimes we give in to the fear to the point of holding ourselves back from it entirely. That’s where Fitz is at when he meets Nighteyes. But what’s so beautiful about their arc as a metaphor is that it suggests that these connections, if we submit to them, are what keep our vital spark alive. Even when Nighteyes dies later in the series, the sentiment always remains, essentially, “It’s better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all.” Ya boi is projecting bc it’s hard to be vulnerable and make friends as an adult, but I think the observation stands. Love and connection and vulnerability are key threads that run throughout all of Fitz’s story, but in this book it is best represented through him and Nighteyes.

- “I hoped I would not become too adept at lying to myself.” Honey, you got a big storm comin.

- Very inch resting (gay) that Fitz finds it hard to meet the Fool’s eyes. I know almost everyone does bc his eyes are weird, but I reserve the right to reach and I will absolutely NOT be accepting criticism.

- I find it interesting that Fitz says Kettricken’s wit is not strong just because she doesn’t use it exactly the way he does

- I know it’s not meant to be funny but……. The way Fitz described losing his virginity had me literally laughing out loud

- Fitz was really like “okay i better go break my bond with Nighteyes” just cos he and Molly fucked. Teenagers don’t deserve rights.

- You know what? I really, really appreciate how fucking weird these books are lol. What other author would use their magic system to have their characters accidentally intruding on each other’s awkward sex stuff? Okay, maybe a few, but they would do it to be like, edgy and sexy. Robin Hobb just does it to make you cringe so hard you lose several years off of your life.

- But seriously, even apart from the cringe stuff, these books get so strange and out there and like! That’s what magic is for!

- Bruh. When Fitz is like “omg poor Verity…. He’ll never have what i have with Molly” I don’t think I’ve ever heard someone encapsulate the self-important delusion of teen romance so perfectly lol. Wow.

- Okay some Fitz/Fool stuff that made me lose my tiny mind. Sorry.

- Fitz literally said about the Fool “he burned too brightly” I WILL DIE.

- Fitz is always like, irritated by the Fool… yet positively delighted by his presence at the same time…… okay bitch

- Inch resting how Fitz has always been uncomfortable with the Fool getting serious. I don’t quite know how to put my thoughts on this into words so like. I’ll just put it there. Make of it what you will.

- “Sit on my clothes chest and take your shirt off…” i stopped fucking breathing noah fence

- “I ran my fingers lightly down the line of his jaw, and around his eye socket. At least no bone seemed damaged. ‘Who did this to you?’ I asked him.” my GOD this is literally textbook gay/romance. It hurts me. It physically hurts me.

- Straight from my notes: “I can’t even focus on reading this bc it’s the first time they are tending each other’s wounds and I am a homosexual!” and “the gays are quaking!! (it’s me I’m the gays)

- Okay wow! I think that’s it! Hello if you made it this far! Hope this was remotely coherent and I’m always keen to hear your thoughts on my thoughts :)

Anyone doing a reread feel free to fill this out! You don’t have to use the tag :)

#rote #realm of the elderlings #royal assassin #royal assassin spoilers #fitzchivalry farseer #realm of the quarantine

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fvlminare · 4 years ago

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✗✗✗ you see [ camille rivas ] around lately? yeah i heard that the [ cis female ] is up to no good. [ she / her ] has been here for [ three years ] now but they’re still pretty [ calculating ] which is fine because they’re also [ ardent ] so it balances out. the [ twenty-six ] year old [ dancer at mayhem ] actually looks like a lot like [ sofia carson ], don’t you think? it’s best to watch out, though, because it’s been said that they’re really into [ the rush of cocaine in her veins & a vice grip on her throat ].

henlo it me again! i hope u guys aren’t sick of me yet bc here’s my other bb! say hello to my boss-ass bish gal camile! she’s sassy, classy and a lil badassy. she’s a rather feisty, fiery, ball of rage and anger who cba with ur bullshit tbh n she’ll tell u this too if u piss her off enough! she’s lowkey cutthroat and always out for number one, aka: herself. but, i mean, she does have some redeeming qualities and her hair is bomb af so that makes up for it all really, doesn’t it? basically that meme: ‘ she’s beauty, she’s grace, she’ll punch you in the face. ’ anywho, you know the drill, slap a lil luv on this n i’ll come pester u for all the good stuff : - )

fundamentals.

CAMILLE ALARA RIVAS — twenty-six, dancer at mayhem, + an honest-to-god vixen / hellcat / lil demoness !

aesthetics ➤ dresses of black lace and red velvet, the scent of chanel perfume lingering in the air as she floats past, blood-red fingertips coiled around the pistol grip of a gun, red-bottomed heels clicking against marble floors, rose gold highlighter shimmering along the height of prominent cheekbones, satin dresses draped over a svelte frame that is shrouded in an air of mystery and intrigue, baby pink roses in a vase on the window sill, deft fingers stained with charcoal and oil paint, the melodic chime of piano keys, delicate digits adorned with moonstone gem rings, a coy smile spread across full crimson lips, long raven locks blowing in the cool breeze of a summer’s evening, battered books with dog-eared pages, a sense of freedom and carelessness when dancing for fun, & a sense of allurement and captivation when dancing for work.

nicknames. cam, cami, mil, millie, spawn of satan >:~)

date of birth. april tenth.

gender. cis female.

pronouns. she + her.

birthplace. manhattan, new york.

orientation. pansexual + demiromantic.

education. bachelor of dance degree obtained from nyu tisch school of the arts.

spoken languages. can speak fluent english, spanish, & latin.

negative traits. capricious, ornery, impulsive, guileful, caustic, brusque, obstinate, destructive, deceptive, & promiscuous.

positive traits. ardent, whimsical, intrepid, graceful, poised, elegant, headstrong, observant, independent, & confident.

strengths. optimistic, energetic, creative, practical, spontaneous, rational, knows how to prioritise, great in a crisis, & relaxed.

weaknesses. stubborn, insensitive, private, reserved, easily bored, dislikes commitment, & has a rather risky behaviour.

talents. ballet, knife throwing, hand-to-hand combat, horse riding, figure skating, piano, violin, painting, singing, & dancing.

physiology. hazel eyes. dark brown hair. five feet, four inches tall. of a petite, slender stature with subtle curves and long hair. has a long silvery scar on her back. her skin is clean of any tattoos. has both earlobes pierced. requires glasses but wears contacts most days. is right-handed.

psychology. aries zodiac. fire element. ravenclaw house. istp-a. true neutral. type seven enneagram. choleric temperament. intra-personal intelligence type. addicted to alcohol, tobacco, and cannabis. suffers from addiction and abandonment issues. her vices are lust, greed and wrath. her virtues are ... ( again ) honestly, probably just diligence tbh.

background.

possible triggers : child abandonment, abandonment issues, foster homes, alcohol, drugs, violence, gore, blood, murder, & death.

a synopsis. ok so for this gal, let’s all give a big, warm welcome to sadness ( no, i was in no way at all inspired by salem from sabrina for that line ) bc boy oh boy, her life has been constant grief and pain, tbh. strap in for the bumpy ride, i’ll give u cookies for compensation. OK SO, camille was abandoned as a baby, never did—and still doesn't—know her biological parents and she doesn’t want to either, tbh. she bounced around from foster home to foster home, never sticking in one place for too long. given her turbulent upbringing, she was somewhat of a difficult child. too boisterous, too unruly, too stubborn, too inquisitive. too much of everything but never enough of anything. never enough for anybody to want her. it didn’t take the girl too long to figure out that it was just her alone, against the big bad world. from the age that she was old enough to realise it, camille knew that she had to fend for herself—that she could never truly rely on a single soul but herself. the hollowness inside her chest never quite satiated, leaving her empty and only too well aware of the lack of her real parental figures. as a young adolescent, this started to crawl under her skin and mess with her mind. it rendered her void of affection and unable to form genuine bonds with others—filling her with deep-rooted resentment that festered beneath the surface of the indifferent demeanour she plastered over herself every day. she always felt starved of love: as if some integral part of her heart was missing, leaving a gaping void that nobody could ever fill. anywho, she fell in with the wrong crowd which did little to aid her foster families hostility toward her. truthfully, most of her experiences in various homes were ... not pleasant. she’d encountered abusive ‘parents,’ horrible ‘siblings,’ and even worse schooling days. pressing the self-destruct button is this gal’s speciality thus she found herself gravitating towards her vices: things and people she knew were no good for her. drink, drugs, people, you name it. quickly, she realised that these things were no longer any good at keeping her dark side at bay: she needed something more, something deeper. thus, she began going down the road of petty crimes—stealing cars, smashing windows, theft, setting fires both metaphorically and literally. due to this lifestyle, she wound up entangled with some real shady folk who did … even shadier things. most specifically, she started dating a real jackass who was violent and truthfully, a horrible person, really. stupidly, she decided to run off into the metaphorical sunset with him * insert eye roll emoji here. * so, fast forward a year or so and things took a swift nosedive when her lowlife boyfriend’s hands were round her throat and not in the kinky way. while she’d clawed at him and tried to fight him off, she struggled against his weight and strength until, eventually, she lifted the first makeshift weapon she felt: a rusted pair of scissors. [ TRIGGER FOR VIOLENCE, GORE, BLOOD, MURDER, DEATH ] and, in a blind state of panic, she jammed them right into his jugular vein, his blood squirting out and decorating her face in crimson splatters. he’d stumbled backwards, clutched onto his neck, blood spurting from the webs between his fingers. naturally, camille was shook about this but somehow managed to flee the scene with less guilt rattling her soul than she’d imagined. [ TRIGGER OVER ] in her mind, it was an act of self defence. it wasn’t too long after the incident that she found herself in a rather perilous situation that resulted in her sudden realisation that she needed to get her damn life on track. therefore, she done the responsible adult thing and got herself a decent education. somehow, she managed to get into university where her life started to shape into a positive one—the kind she’d always dreamed of. once she graduated, camille decided that she wanted to see the world. following a couple of years travelling, she wound up in santa ysabel where she quickly fell into the employment of mayhem. admittedly, this was a far cry from the future she’d envisioned when she was just a sweet, innocent lil child. still, all in all, she kind of digs who she is and what she is: after everything she’s been through, she loves herself. it’s been a long and winding road but camille finally believes that she’s settled in her life now. tho she still refuses to let people in, her abandonment issues terrifying her to the degree that she feels that anybody she’d ever let into her life would eventually leave her in the end. * insert sad face emoji here. *

random extras.

her tell? playing with her hair: when she’s lying, nervous, flirting—you name it!

can drink any man under the table.

she loves art in every form: paintings, sculptures, music, dance, people, etc. she loves the freedom that expressing herself through these mediums gives her.

she’s ... experimental. she’s experimented with just about everything: hairstyles, clothing, drink, drugs, people ...

can be hella calculating and vindictive so do not cross her.

quite power-hungry tbh.

she does have a shot at redemption but she doesn’t want it lmao. she’s already been to hell so why bother trying to right her wrongs?

and boy, are her wrongs a century-long list shkjsh.

high key is not above killing people who don’t do things her way.

doesn’t believe she’s capable of loving anyone.

she’s lowkey a perfectionist to the point of being ruthless, also cutthroat and egotistical.

if ya ain’t of use to her, then what the heck is ur purpose???

she’s v ambitious, v morally ambiguous, v self-serving and v self-involved.

she can be ... aggressive sometimes and most definitely has anger issues.

dry sense of humour one million per cent.

her signature look is her blood-red lips.

extremely skilled with knives and blades. and always carries one on her person at all times.

her most prized possession is her brushed chrome zippo lighter. it has her initials engraved into it and where she got it from, or who is something she’ll never tell.

always says she needs to quit smoking but never does and probably never will either.

did someone say ... resting bitch face???

tho when she smiles it’s like sunshine uwu

high key will sleep with anyone.

first place is the ONLY acceptable place, ok???

one of those people who just excels at everything she tries her hand at.

absolutely adores animals. much prefers them to humans.

she’s quite adventurous and loves to feel the adrenaline in her blood.

doesn’t take herself or her life too seriously.

always up for a good time and is usually the life of the party.

outspoken and quick-witted with a sharp tongue.

much too sassy and sarcastic for her own good.

really, she does what she wants to, when she wants to, without seeking the approval of others.

truthfully? she’s a bit of a spitfire if you really irk her. so, watch out.

you can find a pinterest board for her by clicking anywhere here.

#* dj khaled vc * anotha one !!!#slap a lil heart on this n i'll hit ya up for le plots !!!#indulgence.intro

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kiruuuuu · 5 years ago

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More BB/Goyo in which Goyo is slowly going mad. On several accounts. (Rating E, fluff/humour/resolved sexual tension + smut, ~5.2k words) - written for @kiruuuuu seeing as she continued obsessing about these two after this piece.

Blackbeard is slowly but surely driving him insane.

One big part is the physical aspect, Goyo isn’t denying it – and if it were only that, he’d be as far from complaining as he could be. If his biggest problem was Blackbeard's attractiveness, he’d live in an almost ideal world with most of his dreams coming true, but as it is, the deep-seated desire burning low and slow in his groin merely ensures Goyo doesn’t forcibly eject Blackbeard from his life again due to all the other reasons the American is personally raising Goyo’s blood pressure. He should’ve expected this outcome and largely did, yet imagining having to combat vague incompatibilities while cruising high on happiness hormones which are released in laughable quantities every time he receives a friendly text over the holidays was somehow decidedly easier to stomach than dealing with actual issues face-to-face.

Goyo knows himself, as does Amaru, which is why he doesn’t disagree with her suggestion of meeting in public the first few times. He’s always been weakest right at the beginning of a fancy, daydreaming of scenarios that leave him short of breath and having to adjust his trousers, hoping they don’t betray him if he happens to be in a public space. Despite knowing better, he’s dived head first into physical relationships and paid the price for it, and after having slept with a married man once (without his knowledge, though the blame of hastiness lay upon him regardless), he vowed to improve. Besides, he suspects Blackbeard hasn’t dated a lot of men, so he should take it slow anyway.

Unfortunately, he wasn’t prepared for the change in wardrobe following a throwaway comment about camouflage patterns because not only did Blackbeard take him seriously and dressed differently for their dates from then on (which is a turn on already), his shirts are also very tight. Not unacceptably so, but entirely too tight for someone with pecs this pronounced. In moments when it was hard to deal with Blackbeard's personality, Goyo reminded himself as to why he was still around by eyeing up Blackbeard's chest and Christ. He would love to grope him for hours. Maybe suckle on those puppies. God.

It doesn’t help that he’s changed his aftershave as well. Goyo felt genuinely bad complaining about so much right away, even if it was done through careful euphemisms and half-jokes he practised beforehand, and promised himself to compliment Blackbeard elaborately should he act on it – but never did he expect for Blackbeard to dip into the nearest shop with him to try and find a fragrance Goyo liked. He claimed he was tired of his old one but hadn’t found an excuse to switch so far, and offered his own opinions additionally to Goyo’s, meaning the entire thing felt organic and constructive instead of passive-aggressive or, worse, blindly compliant. As a result, Goyo stands that tiny bit closer whenever he can. Prolongs their hugs. Inhales consciously whenever they kiss. He loves a good-smelling man, and Blackbeard has turned from handsome to painfully sexy.

He makes sure Blackbeard knows, too. He might be picky and demanding, but he would like to think of himself as appreciative, so whenever he notices the American looking or smelling exceptionally good, he remarks on it. And the delighted expressions he reaps are worth feeding this inflated ego. He doesn’t think the other man has been complimented on his appearance much, certainly not by fellow guys.

The very first thing they fight about is punctuality. As inevitable as death. It turns into a recurring theme as they simply can’t agree on anything and Goyo’s laid-back attitude towards time sparks nothing but disbelief in Blackbeard – he does learn by setting their meeting half an hour before he actually arrives, but whenever he’s meant to pick Goyo up by car, he shows up on the dot and paces impatiently around the flat without taking his shoes off while Goyo finishes whichever task held him up. Blackbeard calls him rude, Goyo waves him off, and the whole drama repeats the next time. They even have a long talk about it, with Goyo stressing the importance of enjoying life at one’s own personal pace, and Blackbeard calling on politeness and prioritising others over tasks such as washing the dishes.

Related to this, Blackbeard always requires an exact plan while Goyo prefers adapting vague ideas to actual circumstances. There’s no spontaneity in most of Blackbeard's actions, he’s rigid and inflexible and it drives Goyo absolutely nuts. After having agreed on watching a film that night, they walk past a fantastic-looking restaurant Goyo instantly wants to try out, and Blackbeard flat out refuses. Just says no. Claims their original plan was superior simply because it was made earlier, and when Goyo points out that literally nothing is stopping them from having dinner together instead of sitting at the cinema for a few hours, Blackbeard is having none of it. He’s hungry, he agrees with Goyo’s assessment that the place looks inviting, and yet he won’t budge. How did he get to where he is now with this attitude?

Also, Blackbeard is loud. And by this, he’s not even referring to his deafening voice – he’s a pitchman manqué – but rather his behaviour as a whole. Nigh everyone can tell his country of origin due to him constantly approaching perfect strangers, which Goyo finds exceedingly rude. People just want to mind their own business, as does he, and he wouldn’t appreciate being accosted by some random dude on the street. Blackbeard has the gall to call him rude as a result and defends himself by pointing out he leaves the grumpy ones alone and has a lovely chat with the rest who seems to enjoy their talk. Blackbeard has no qualms cursing in public and calling out unacceptable behaviour, and Goyo preferred the ground to swallow him whenever his companion starts an argument with a line skipper or someone parking like an idiot.

What, am I supposed to just tut and walk away?, Blackbeard scoffs, his tone making clear what he thinks of the British nation as a whole.

There are countless other details: Blackbeard's apartment is messy. He can’t cook for the life of him, yet is an utter baking snob. He leaves the toilet seat up. He loves the worst kind of cheesy patriotic action films and accepts no criticism on this. The music in his car leaves Goyo’s ears ringing for the rest of the evening. He seems to think kissing is the only worthwhile public display of affection. He’s ignorant about most other cultures yet fancies himself open-minded because his best friend is Korean – this only means he compares anything and everything either to the States or Korea. Getting him to eat anything he hasn’t tried before is an uphill struggle. Except if it’s Korean.

Vigil seems to get a pass on nearly everything, and Goyo is beginning to think Blackbeard either had or still has a crush on the man. He’s empathetic and understanding as can be with Vigil, and almost seems to enjoy arguing with Goyo. It’s getting old fast.

And then there are those other moments. The ones so sharp and vivid they linger in Goyo’s mind long after the fact, bright and warm like a sip of good alcohol, and almost as intoxicating too. They end up eating in the restaurant after all, and Goyo is mentally preparing for the backlash if it turns out to be rubbish – not that he thinks it will be, but he’d rather outline his defence already. In the back of his mind, he’s wondering whether he’s the stubborn one in this case, with his insistence to get his way showcasing his own inflexibility. His mother taught him to be kind whenever he can afford it, yet past experiences and an underlying pessimism usually convince him he can’t. He knows she’d be disappointed with how often he chooses the less compassionate path.

“I’m not good at this”, Blackbeard announces out of the blue, throwing Goyo off once more. This happens regularly, him spiralling and conducting a whole other conversation in his mind, and Blackbeard interrupting his thoughts with something outlandish. Most of the time, Goyo is relieved about it. He tends to get lost and is glad whenever he’s brought back to the present.

Since there’s no indication as to what he means, Goyo needs him to clarify. “At what?”

“Just… this.” And Blackbeard gestures somewhere between them. “Compromising. Letting someone else into my life. Listening.”

I know someone else who’s terrible at all three of those, Goyo thinks and doesn’t say.

“But I like you. And I want to get better. So please be patient with me and talk to me. Okay?”

Blackbeard likes him.

Idiotically, hearing it out loud makes him giddy as if this was a new revelation, but then his brain latches on to the much more important implication of Blackbeard wanting to communicate, being willing to work on himself and on the both of them, admitting faults. It’s a beacon of hope and one he didn’t expect – Blackbeard has never struck him as particularly introspective, not with how he values arbitrary rules above creative thinking, yet it seems he underestimated him. He’ll have to correct his mental image and allow Blackbeard to improve.

“Yes. That sounds good”, he replies after mulling over Blackbeard's words for a bit, prompting a sigh of relief. And, to throw him a bone: “You’re doing good.”

A scoff. “Am I though?”

“You are. Why else would I say it?”

“I don’t know. You just…” Blackbeard lowers his gaze, searching for the right thing to say. “I’m nervous around you.”

Goyo laughs. Can’t help it, he bursts out with a brief laugh turning into a hearty chuckle because – Blackbeard gets nervous? He dreaded being in the same room as the American early on and never managed to settle down in his presence, and now he’s learning it was reciprocal? Had he known he could’ve scared him away, he might’ve confronted Blackbeard earlier, returned the sass, threw his weight around a little. Instead, they were watching each other like hawks for ultimately only marginally different reasons. Nothing about Blackbeard is adorable, but this is the closest thing to it: him being bashful, admitting his crush, relinquishing power and inviting himself to be mocked. Goyo is delighted.

“You don’t need to be”, he reassures and runs his fingertips over the back of Blackbeard's hand, a gentle gesture he seems to appreciate.

There are these moments which remind Goyo why he gave Blackbeard a chance in the first place, and they are what keep him going whenever Blackbeard starts arguing in favour of one of his ‘life principles’.

“I made a mistake”, Goyo states, not bothering to hide his fatalistic tone of voice.

Amaru is instantly entertained. Her optimistic and easygoing attitude is part of the reason why she got along so swimmingly with Goyo’s mother, and also why he’s endlessly grateful for her presence in his life: she helped him get past failures whenever his mum wasn’t available, and provided encouragement and support whenever he needed it. It’s also why he keeps bothering her with his problems. “Does it have anything to do with your new relationship?”

She watched from a distance as he made his first few questionable choices in his dating career, ready to pick him up and dust him off whenever he’d fallen down. He learned to accept and value her advice once he realised she was never wrong, so he’s hoping she can assist him with his current predicament. “How did you guess?”, he sighs, not requiring an answer. “They’re showing a documentary I’m interested in on TV this evening, and I mentioned it to Craig.”

“So now he wants to watch it with you?”, his aunt surmises, making him nod. “Which means you’d have to spend the evening with him without falling victim to his manly wiles.” He nods again, looking pained. “And you want me to give you the go-ahead for making up an excuse so you don’t have a bad conscience when you cancel on him.”

Well. Maybe she was the wrong person to approach about this. “When you put it like that, it sounds… bad.”

She raises an unimpressed eyebrow. “Don Goyo, you’re old enough to not need my approval. Which you’re not going to get anyway, before you ask.”

“I have a feeling I know what you’re about to say to me.”

“Just tell him. If you’re not ready, he needs to know. He deserves to know, César.”

It’s not that he isn’t ready. If it was for him, they’d have fucked in the nearest public stall on their second date, he’s been dreaming about strong arms and an insistent tongue for almost the entire month that they’ve been dating. He’s overripe, and still – it doesn’t feel right somehow. Like he should wait a little longer. They’ve gotten to know each other much better, anticipating each other’s moods, making small gifts here and there and texting daily. Even so, there’s just something.

“Don’t brood. Go and talk to him. Either he respects your boundaries and everything’s good, or he refuses and you can launch him into outer space. No matter the outcome, you’ll be off better than before.”

She must sense his hesitation as she tries to instil her wisdom a few more times before giving up and wishing him a pleasant night. He leaves, conflicted – he doesn’t want to hurt Blackbeard's feelings by rejecting him before even anything happens, and at the same time he’s not comfortable actually reaching below the belt yet.

He’s hoping Blackbeard simply doesn’t try anything. It’s the best case scenario.

About eight hours later, all Goyo can think between different versions of God this feels so fucking good is: this didn’t go to plan at all. Blackbeard is buried up to the hilt and Goyo is grateful for being momentarily distracted so he has an excuse not to think critically about what’s happening right then.

And it started out so well.

Goyo arrives only fifteen minutes late, which he thinks is more than reasonable even if Blackbeard doesn’t comment on it, and takes note of the slightly less messy flat – it’s not even that bad normally, some dirty dishes scattered around and pieces of clothing, but at least they give the otherwise relatively barren apartment some character. They kiss as a greeting, briefly, as Blackbeard is busy heating up something to eat, and then sit on the couch with plates on their laps, chatting about their day while waiting for the program to start.

It’s domestic. It should be relaxing and pleasant, not nerve-wracking, but after sitting next to Blackbeard for ten minutes of serious introduction and noticing how his sweatpants don’t really do a good job at hiding anything, Goyo knows he won’t do anything to stop him should he make a move. In a way, it’d be a relief: get it over and done with, don’t dwell on it, move on. The anticipation is putting him on edge, keeps his hairs standing up and his breaths measured. He’s hyper-aware of his knee brushing against Blackbeard's, the broad chest next to him rising and falling, the thumping of his own heart.

He can’t concentrate. Images flash on the screen, a soothing narrator recounts past horrors in a deep voice and historical photographs take turns. He’d actually been looking forward to watching this programme, and should’ve known doing it together with Blackbeard would end in disaster, yet wasn’t prepared for himself being the culprit. Blackbeard has beautiful arms, oozing latent strength and tanned nicely, the dark hairs making them even more appealing. Maybe he doesn’t shave his chest. He probably doesn’t, would consider it unmanly, and with how lush and full his beard is -

“Can I get you a beer?”

Goyo blinks. It’s a commercial break, he hadn’t even noticed. “No”, he says, and thinks: and I’d rather you didn’t have one either. The taste of it is revolting to him.

“I’ll just get one for myself then”, Blackbeard replies, already risen from the sofa, and makes the mistake of leaning down for a quick, once again domestic kiss. It’s reciprocated just a tad too enthusiastically, so Blackbeard pushes back and after a few more seconds they’re tongue wrestling with an uncomfortable height difference between them. The angle is awkward but the feel of it amazing – and this is something Goyo has openly admitted numerous times: he loves the way Blackbeard kisses. Adores it. Can’t get enough of it. It’s intense and deep and wet and leaves him panting every time, with this being no exception.

He drags the other man in, forcing him to steady himself with one knee on the couch, one knee right between Goyo’s legs and both hands cupping his face. This, too, is shockingly sexy, the way Blackbeard keeps him in place to take him apart. Goyo reaches out and runs his fingers over Blackbeard's body and dear God his thighs are like stone, and his back muscles pronounced, and his abs too. He’s tilted far back now, the bear hovering over him, solid and threatening and like a rock set in motion. Soul-crushing. Inevitable.

They kiss until the break is over, until at least one of them is making these embarrassing little noises, until Goyo’s lips feel swollen and his cock is harder than it’s ever been in his life, until Blackbeard breaks off, flushed, sweating and dishevelled, and Goyo wants to suck his dick or he’ll die. Making out has always been Goyo’s weakspot, and making out like this is guaranteed to leave him weeping and ruining his underwear, and he knew Blackbeard was gonna try something. He just knew. They wouldn’t have snogged like this without purpose, without an ulterior motive, without the intention of moving on to more sinful things now.

“We should”, Blackbeard starts and has trouble focusing his gaze, “let’s – I mean -” His sweatpants really don’t let him get away with anything. Unbelievably, he disengages and plops down next to Goyo. Apparently he wants to keep watching, which is the sensible thing to do.

Yes. A good idea. Getting caught up in the moment isn’t what Goyo wants anyway.

Blackbeard is radiating heat. His confident persona has crumbled, revealing a passionate yet considerate lover, a man torn between doing the right thing and doing what feels right. Right now, his upper brain seems to be winning, or maybe he figures if he behaves, Goyo will reward him regardless, or he’s hoping Goyo will stay the night and they can fuck later, or he’s playing hard-to-get. The last option would be hilarious, since Goyo isn’t interested in buying what Blackbeard is selling for now. They should really go back to watching TV, and when it’s over, they can talk a little, and then Goyo’s going home.

Two minutes later, he’s straddling Blackbeard's lap while shoving his tongue so far down the other man’s throat it’s a miracle he’s not choking, and nearly coming in his own pants from the bit of friction he manages to get between his dick and Blackbeard's taut stomach. He’s a fucking magnet and an oven with how hot he is, mewling into the kiss like someone who’s desperate for any kind of attention, like a starving or drowning or poisoned man, like – like Goyo. His beard is soft and smells good, and when Goyo’s hands stray below fabric, he finds more hair on a broad chest and buries his fingers in it. The rugged edge Blackbeard visibly sports continues where the normal gaze doesn’t penetrate, Goyo is relieved to discover, and he can finally feel up these gorgeous tits. Get his hands on them and massage them however he likes.

His nipples are delightfully sensitive and Goyo spends too much time teasing them while sucking deep purple bruises just below Blackbeard's collar until he’s worried about Blackbeard exploding under his merciless ministrations. Frotting has been knocked down in priority now that he can twist strangled moans out of the hard body beneath him, but when his cock throbs almost painfully at a gasp, he knows they can’t go on like this.

“Please give me a moment”, Blackbeard gasps out, cheeks rosy and eyes unfocused.

Again, a reasonable request. He should listen.

“Bedroom”, he snaps and it’s not even a suggestion. He can feel his hole pulsing with the irresistible desire of getting plowed and when Blackbeard, after a second of disbelief, picks him up to carry him through the flat, Goyo is thankful for his foresight to bring condoms and lube regardless of his intentions. He had a hunch Blackbeard would try something.

They only shed what’s necessary (and the shapely legs are somehow only improved with socks on, but Goyo has been told before that it’s a sock fetish at this point) and preparation is an unceremonious affair except for the fact that Goyo sucks on Blackbeard's nipples until they’re raw and too sensitive while fingering himself open. The American has a great body, he has to admit, well-developed muscles, some scars here and there, coarse black hair adorning tanned skin and an upward curved cock beautiful enough to have Goyo’s mouth water, so sitting down on it feels predictably mind-blowing.

He does most of the work, which is fortunate as he can experiment with angles until he’s found one that actually makes him go cross-eyed, and once Blackbeard draws the connection between his blissful groans and whatever’s happening between their legs, he starts thrusting up and dear Lord.

This isn’t what Goyo had in mind when coming over, and yet he can’t find the brain capacity to regret or even care right now, not with how urgent his lust is tugging on his nerve endings, forcing him to ride towards exhaustion and cramps and an impressive muscle hangover the next day. Being able to steady himself on Blackbeard's torso is surprisingly sexy and the sheer barrage of pleasure bursting through him every time he slams down his hips keeps him from touching himself, effectively prolonging his sweet suffering.

Moving in unison has never felt this good and for once, they’re on the same wavelength, exchanging devoted gazes and trading the odd kiss. It’s akin to a reunion instead of a first time, like they’ve rehearsed this song and dance to perfection in the past and, despite a certain rustiness, are quickly finding back into their old routine.

When Goyo comes, his vision goes colourful with how tight he’s squeezing his eyelids shut. He shakes violently while balanced on Blackbeard's hips and gasps for air, overwhelmed by the elation accompanying his release and shooting his sperm all over Blackbeard's mangled chest, over the lovebites and the red marks his hands left behind from carrying his weight. His relief is crushing, and so he slumps down bonelessly, allowing the other man to pump into him a few more times before announcing his own climax with a low moan. Instinctively, it seems, Blackbeard’s palms travel over the back of his sweaty t-shirt, petting him reassuringly.

Goyo doesn’t like it. It feels like too much, like overstimulation after a long, satisfying session even though his was hardly long but certainly satisfying. He shakes the hands off and climbs down, trying to catch his breath. Next to him, blue eyes snap to his face, too attentive. Blackbeard looks like he’s not sure what to say. Goyo could lighten the situation, compliment him, make a joke, or be sincere about how much he enjoyed himself. Because he did.

Even with the afterglow fading fast.

“I’ll go shower first”, he announces and leaves with a quick kiss that seems unsubstantial. He’s gone before Blackbeard has even taken the condom off, and the sensation of dirtiness clinging to his skin seems to go beyond bodily fluids. Scrubbing himself with the only loofah (and isn’t that a surprise) wouldn’t be right, so he uses his own fingers to wipe off the odd feeling.

Blackbeard is sitting on the edge of the bed when he returns, and now he can finally place the source of the awkwardness between them: he’s not babbling. Normally, he’d have commented on Goyo’s stamina, maybe how great his arse looked, recounted an anecdote of some sorts, or even attempted a lame joke, yet all he’s doing is watching. He looks a little lost. Silvery droplets are caught in his chest hair and when they kiss again, Goyo deflects a hug with the excuse of wanting to remain clean, demands that Blackbeard go shower as well.

The bed is large and tidier than the rest of the room, as if Blackbeard had anticipated them ending up here. Despite the general lack of colour in the apartment, the duvet is beautiful with a dark turquoise pattern. The cushions look fluffy, but not too soft. It looks inviting. Goyo did bring a spare pair of underwear, knowing their shoe and therefore sock size is the same, and he briefly pictures waking Blackbeard up by sucking him off. It’s unlikely to happen, with how different their morning routines are – what little he knows anyway – and still, the image is most tempting.

He gets caught in the hallway with one shoe on his foot already, the other in his hands.

His stomach drops and speech evades him out of shame as Blackbeard leans against the door frame, tight briefs highlighting all his best assets. Oddly enough, he doesn’t seem disappointed or hurt, which does nothing to quell the burning feeling of being a disgrace eating away at Goyo’s insides.

“What are you doing?”, he asks, no reproach in his voice. Patience is one of his virtues and one he displays right now – if there was ever a moment when Goyo expected an outburst, an indignant rant, it’d be now. Instead, he picks up on a hesitant disquiet, an uneasy curiosity. Blackbeard doesn’t know what’s going on, but he knows it’s important, therefore he treats it with the same mindfulness he does any serious issue.

Goyo owes him this. If there’s anything he owes this man, it’s an attempt at an explanation. Since he’s formulated it before, talked it through with past partners, he’s not unprepared yet dreads bringing it up nonetheless. “I have… commitment issues”, he replies softly.

The answering silence is one of racing thoughts, he can read it on Blackbeard's open expression. “Do you want to talk about it?”, he eventually wants to know. For a guy with no idea of how to deal with this, he’s faring remarkably well.

“I am talking about it.” Defensive. He inhales deeply before continuing. “I have trouble opening up to others. I prefer keeping most of me to myself. I can’t trust easily.”

A nod. It hurts; it means Blackbeard has noticed but didn’t dare bring it up. Always the same thing. Goyo fights down a pang of annoyance – part of his mind tries to convince him they don’t deserve him: either they mention it, which makes them whiny complainers not ready to give him time, or they don’t, which means they don’t care enough. It’s bullshit and pops up in the back of his head every time. “Am I suffocating you?”

He almost laughs at the ridiculousness of the notion. Blackbeard, who maybe suggests a quarter of their dates, who never complains about Goyo taking some time to reply to messages, who always accepts when Goyo wants to go home, seriously thinks he’s clingy. If anything, Goyo would like for him to be more overbearing, insert himself into Goyo’s life more aggressively. “No. You’re giving me all the space I need.” Too much, at times.

“Am I doing anything wrong?”

Well. What isn’t he doing wrong. Goyo’s heart melts a little over this brute trying to figure out why his lover is sneaking out on him, when it’s nothing but Goyo’s ugly side finally showing. He’s being unfair. “I didn’t want to sleep with you”, he says and knows instantly it was the worst possible thing he could’ve said, with how Blackbeard gains a look of horror, paling immediately, arms dropping by his side, slack, mouth working out an apology before the meaning has even reached his brain. Bad with words. This one he can’t really chalk up to bad timing. “No, that’s not what I meant. I wanted it and I liked it. I really did.” He’s flustered, flailing now, in unfamiliar territory, allowing the first thought to drop out of his mouth without scrutinising it first, and feels like it only gets worse. “But I – I had myself convinced I didn’t want it. Because, I don’t know. I’m -” Scared, he can’t bring himself to say. He knows it’d tear a wound which might not heal so easily. “Look. I’ll go. You don’t have to deal with this.”

No one should have to deal with him like this, sputtering and ashamed to the core, cheeks hot and composure non-existent. He wants to go home and hide for the next century and if Blackbeard told him now he’s not worth the trouble he’s causing, he wouldn’t even object.

“Don’t.” A plea. Heartfelt, for what it’s worth, but any other way and Goyo would already be putting on his second shoe. “I don’t know what to do, or what to say. I don’t know what you’d like me to do or say.”

Neither does Goyo. That’s the whole problem.

Blackbeard must be cold, nearly naked and standing in the faint draft coming in from under the door. He shifts his weight uncomfortably as they stare at each other. Please, Goyo thinks, unsure of what he even means by that. But when the next words hit his ears, he knows it’s what he’s been hoping for: “Just… come back to bed. Okay?”

The shoe hits the ground with a sharp sound cutting through the tense atmosphere between them.

Unsurprisingly, Blackbeard prefers being the big spoon. They fight over the blanket since Goyo needs it to sleep whereas Blackbeard insists it’s entirely too warm, and the familiar back-and-forth calms his racing heart. As does the gentle hand rubbing vague circles into his chest while they cuddle. After a few soothing moments, he asks the dreaded question of when Blackbeard's first alarm will go off, resulting in even more bickering.

“I really wanted to watch that documentary”, Goyo mumbles regretfully against the arm he’s cradling like a stuffed toy, partly because it’s wonderfully warm and partly because the skin-on-skin contact does funny things to his stomach. Being pressed against the length of Blackbeard's body is magical. He hasn’t felt this safe in a long while.

“Don’t worry, I recorded it.”

The reply, half lost in his hair, gives Goyo pause. If they could actually see anything in the impenetrable darkness Blackbeard requires to sleep peacefully, he’d turn around in indignation. “So you expected something like this to happen?”

He can feel the smile against his scalp. “Call it wishful thinking. Doing nothing but kissing did take its toll.”

Huh. Seems like he was right.

Blackbeard really did plan on trying something.

#rainbow six siege #blackbeard #goyo #blackbeard/goyo #thiod #fanfic #this is far from the last time you'll hear from these two #bb is trying so hard #good thing goyo threw him a bone iykwim #this is a hole I didn't expect to fall into

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katewestin · 5 years ago

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Have you seen (KATHERINE ‘KATE’ WESTIN) around New York? They look a lot like (ROSAMUND PIKE) but i don’t think they’ve even realized it! Some people say they are (WELL-READ AND DRIVEN) and (ALOOF AND JEALOUS) but all we know for sure is they are (40), (CIS FEMALE, BISEXUAL) and work as an (LAWYER). I guess only time will tell but for now we’ll just call them the (SPITFIRE). They were born on (4/18/1979) and they think that the quote that most describes them is (“Love is a fire, but whether it is going to warm your heart or burn down your house. You can never tell.”)

hey !! neely here. i’m back with my new bb, kate. she’s kind of awful but i love her anyway.

full name: katherine ‘kate’ westin, nee; trémaux

nickname(s): kate, katie

age: forty

date of birth: april 18th

hometown: manhattan, nyc

current location: manhattan, nyc

ethnicity: caucasian

nationality: french-american

gender: cis female

pronouns: she/her

marital status: married

orientation: bisexual

religion: raised catholic, but personally agnostic

occupation: lawyer

language(s) spoken: french, english

accent: american, with hints of french

born katherine trémaux in new york city, kate is the daughter of french parents who picked up their life in paris to move to the united states to raise a family. she’s the eldest of three children, she has a younger sister and brother, and is incredibly close with them, as well as her parents. her family has always been an important part of her life, they mean everything to her and would do anything for them.

her father was a stock broker and her mother, a socialite, which meant the family always had enough money, and that got them and their children to higher places in life, though, kate didn’t always need the help due to her intelligence that got her to harvard to study law. she graduated at the top of her class with donors, and the school was where she met the man who would eventually be her first husband. they fell in love quickly and got married after 4 years of dating. they had no children, and had no plans for any, as they were both far too focused on their careers to start a family.

it was later in their marriage when she began an affair with a friend of theirs, erik westin, who was married at the time too. they were involved for over a year before they left their spouses from each other upon finding out kate was pregnant with their first child.

she and erik are now married, and have two young daughters, annaliese, who is four, and lily who is one year old. she is in love with erik, but knows he still has a wandering eye, which makes her feel insecure and incredibly jealous. she has a very jealous nature, which she can’t really control, though, she would probably sleep with someone else if she found out her husband did the same, just to spite him. their relationship isn’t traditional by any means, and some would even call it toxic, in a way.

kate works at an elite law firm in manhattan as a criminal defence lawyer. she’s been the attorney for some of the worst criminals you can think of and she’s really good at her job. she’s in the slow process of starting her own firm and already has some big names backing her and joining the team, so it will definitely go smoothly.

kate’s personality is very aloof. she isn’t the friendliest person you’ll ever meet, but she can be very charming when she needs to be. if she thinks you’re worthy of it, she will be as sweet as can be, but she really is, for lack of better words, a bitch.

possible connections !

best friend

fellow lawyers from the same firm

neighbors

someone who nannies her daughters

a flirtationship ( i’d die for this )

anything !!

#lydintro

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reylothiccficcs-blog · 6 years ago

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Reylo Hogwarts AUs

Sixth year by Ever9437 (M)

Completed? Yes.

Word Count? 107,070

This was supposed to be Rey Kenobi’s perfect year at Hogwarts: Ravenclaw prefect, seeker, all N.E.W.T classes, and lots of spare time to hang out with her friends Finn and Poe. That is, until she’s paired up in Potions class with arrogant Slytherin Ben Solo, nephew of the school’s headmaster Luke Skywalker and best-friend to her mortal enemy. With an overload of homework, strained friendships, and a new dark-haired distraction, Rey is in for a stressful school-year like no other.

Nocturnal Studies And Other Peculiar Magic by WaterlilyRose (E)

Completed? Yes.

Word Count? 37,256

Hogwarts was the first home Rey ever had. Now she has a chance to return as a grown woman to be the Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher.

She cannot tolerate the Potions Master and former Death Eater that she duelled and scarred so many years ago. Yet unity must be upheld.

Gryffindor and Slytherin will unite in ways never before.

If You Win This by gr8_rach (T)

Completed? Yes.

Word Count? 2,860

“Let’s play some sodding Quidditch already—I mean, honestly if we sit here waiting for Rey and Ben to f—” BB’s loud gasp covered the terribly obscene word, “—we’ll all die of old age!”

The Last Hog at Hogwarts by mylevelance (G)

Completed? Yes.

Word Count? 14,180

Rey is attacked by death eaters out in the open and Finn (kind of) saves her. Her life changes forever when he brings her to Hogwarts to (kind of) hone her natural skill. Ben Solo (kind of) tries to hate this scrappy girl from a home so different from his own. Finn (kind of) keeps his feelings for Poe quiet. Rose is (kind of) a teenage fairy godmother. When it comes to Ben, Rey needs a little help from her friends. Kind of.

Tell me, Atlas by DeathStarryNight (M)

Completed? No.

Word Count? 16,906

Rey is a Hufflepuff. Ben is a Slytherin. Everyone knows they hate each other. Who could not, when they're always spitting acid in the hallways? But sixth year dawns darker than ever before. With the new threat of Snoke looming in the background, Rey and Ben find themselves paired as unlikely partners and Rey suddenly realizes that there might be more to Ben Solo than she originally thought. As the Death Eaters call, will it be enough to turn him away from the dark side before it's too late?

Tell me, Atlas, what is heavier: the world or its people's hearts?

Nominis by Oh_Snapcrackle (E)

Completed? No.

Word Count? 14,592

He must feel her gaze because it doesn’t take long before one of his eyes slowly cracks open. There is a twinkle to it, a little hint of mischief that makes her stomach somersault.

“Solo, close those eyes. Remember what we discussed about meditation.”

Ben’s smile falters. A flash of anger ignites in his eye, and it’s so different from the warmth she saw a second before. She watches as his hands ball into fists and his jaw clenches.

All of this because his uncle spoke to him?

She shuts her eyes, knowing Skywalker is sure to look at her next.

“And you, too, Miss Niima. Don’t let my nephew derail your practice.”

He has a reputation. It’s not a good one.

When Professor Skywalker partners Rey with the notorious Ben Solo for occulmency lessons, something goes wrong (or very right) and now their minds are bridged. Between sharing thoughts, inconvenient astral projections, and bedsharing Rey starts to learn that while Ben Solo deserves the reputation he has built, he also deserves the opportunity to change.

AKA: The force bond Harry Potter style.

Unwritten Oaths by reylocalligraphy (T)

Completed? No.

Word Count? 35,247

“I'd rather be dead than ever stuck in a room with Ben Solo,” Rey hissed.

Six years later, Head Girl Rey Johnson finds herself stuck sharing dormitories, meetings, a bathroom, and a hell of a lot more with Head Boy Ben Solo, her sworn enemy at Hogwarts. She discovers that her eleven-year-old self was quite wrong - in fact, she’d actually love to be stuck in a room with Ben Solo.

If only Ben wasn’t such a stuck-up, scruffy-looking nerfherder every time he opened his mouth… and that damn school-wide fan club of his would stop following him everywhere…

Floricorpse by nite0wl29 (G)

Completed? Yes.

Word Count? 2,118

Never ask what could go wrong on Halloween in Transfiguration class. Ben and Rey are about to find out first hand.

Rey and Her Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Year by Bakubitch (T)

Completed? Yes.

Word Count? 52,756

Rey is eleven when her dreams come true and the Sorting Hat calls out “Gryffindor!”

Or: The Reylo Hogwarts AU no one asked for.

To: Professor Rey Niima's Husband by kuresoto (T)

Completed? Yes.

Word Count? 1,749

There are a few rumors going around in Hogwarts.

Spiraling Steam and Broomstick Wood by jitterygummy (T)

Completed? Yes.

Word Count? 30,716

Sixth year Hogwarts student Rey is focused on winning the next Quidditch match, but while brewing amortentia, she realizes she has feelings for rival player Ben Solo.

The ORDER of ASTER by violetskies (rainingiris) (M)

Completed? Yes.

Word Count? 4,040

Five years after the Third Great Wizarding War, Rey Niima enters the public spotlight and attends the Memorial Ball. She clings to her best friends as she is forced to hear speeches about the Rogues, Leia, and Han from people who never knew them. She cringes when the reporters harass the guests of honor. Poe is an auror and a brilliant one at that. Finn works in the Ministry to promote Civil Rights. Rose is a leading botanist. Yet no one asks about those things. Let the past die. Poe clenches his fists when they sneer his name. Finn makes a valiant attempt to change the subject. Rose holds Rey’s hand and urges the brunette witch to leave. Rey can’t keep running away. Let the past die. Those words ram into Rey’s mind. She wants to forget about that horrible night. About the stench of death. About the blood on her hands. About the dull brown eyes. Those eyes that haunt her every nightmare. Let the past die. Rey finds that she can’t. And she is not the only one.

Chaos reigned. by Orlaith (M)

Completed? Yes.

Word Count? 13,142

“You leave me no choice but to take points,” Professor Calrissian said. “Fifty points from both Gryffindor and Slytherin,” he stated.

“And a month’s worth of detention.”

Rey’s eyes darted to the end of the corridor. Students parted and the head of Gryffindor, the Transfiguration professor, and Ben Solo’s father now stood in front of the pair. Rey looked at the ground. She had no problem getting in trouble, in fact she frequented it. But disappointing Han was too much for her.

“Ben. Rey.” The man tried to make eye contact, but both avoided his gaze. This is ridiculous.”

The girl stood there with her green hair, and the boy with his Dumbo ears, stewing in their anger.

Rey raised her eyes only to glare at Ben, and she found the same look mirrored in his eyes.

Limerence by Lenti (G)

Completed? Yes.

Word Count? 3,043

The saying “opposites attract" is a popular wisdom in all universes. And, who could be greater polar opposites but a Slytherin and Gryffindor?

#reylo #hogwarts au #harry potter #harry potter au #rey x ben solo #rey x kylo ren #reylo fanfic #hogwarts

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kyluxtrashpit · 6 years ago

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Okay so this started as an addition to @sinningsquire‘s recent post and the subsequent discussion but then it kinda took on a life of its own and then it got REALLY STUPIDLY LONG so I’m going to avoid cluttering the notes and just put my ramble here on my own blog lmao. Anyone is free to disagree, this is just me being inspired by the discussion and adding some thoughts, but this is also how the characters come across to me and I’m unlikely to change my mind at this point. Also I’m putting it behind a cut, but if you’re on mobile, I am so fucking sorry omg. Go filter ‘long post’, refresh, and then you’ll be okay

So the thing about Kylo and Hux that I keep coming back to years into this ship is that they’re complimentary opposites, which I think this is another example of. While I am on team ‘Kylo is going to be bad at Supreme Leadering’, I don’t think that necessarily means he’s bad at all leadership and military-related things ever. Because he’s not, it’s just that what he’s good at vs what Hux is good at are different things and there’s more to Supreme Leadering than a military operation

(Opinions lie beyond here! Read at your own discretion!)

First, I will say I’m basing more of this on TFA’s considerations than TLJ’s because TLJ suffers from Good Guys Need To Win syndrome really badly and that was honestly my biggest complaint about it, even immediately after coming out of the theatre. This is far from a rare occurrence and many sw villains have been essentially neutered by this (e.g. Thrawn in Rebels; one of the greatest Imperial strategists sort of succeeding like once ever and otherwise being repeatedly outsmarted by a child for most of the series). Hux was the most obvious victim of it (tbh I don’t think Kylo was ooc at all in TLJ), but I also think Snoke got hit a little too. Basically RJ painted the Resistance into such a tight corner that the only way he could get them out was to make the FO, which had apparently just recently claimed a big victory, look like complete morons

Personally, I’ve headcanoned Hux being useless in TLJ as a result of his repressed post-Starkiller breakdown. He just lost his life’s work and his boss physically abused him in public over it at least once, so it adds up, for me. Thus most of this comes from TFA and the pre-TLJ novelizations. But anyways. I’ll say now if you’re hard on the useless Hux train, you’ll probably disagree with every point below here lmao

So the thing about Kylo is that he seems good at small-scale operations. Give him a single squadron or a small group (e.g. his Knights) and I think he can get the thing done effectively, provided his emotional state remains stable (which, with him, is a pretty big concern). As some pointed out in the notes on the post that inspired this, he does do alright on Takodana. The mistake he makes is in taking the unknown quantity that is Rey as opposed to the known quantity that is BB-8, though in his defence, there’s no way he could’ve known just how badly that would go. And perhaps he did so partially because the Resistance had arrived and he didn’t have time to find BB-8 before it got messy when she was right there, so I’ll give him that one. He does make some other strategic mistakes, such as in the snow fight when he makes the mistake of underestimating and toying with Finn, but perhaps we can chock that up to his emotional state, him actively bleeding out at the time, and the fact that everyone seems to underestimate Finn. Still, I think he’s largely successful at small-scale stuff, as long as he’s relatively calm (note: he is not calm nor successful for the entirety of TLJ, aside from killing Snoke, which he had help with in the form of a distraction , so I won’t really go into it. It is the most cunning we see from him in any piece of SW media, but it appears to me to be an outlying example. It’s also the only time he’s ever managed to succeed at something he set out to do, aside from killing Han, which was only emotionally difficult, not mechanically so. But anyways)

As an aside, I also don’t think the main argument of Kylo’s family is enough of a claim to show he’s a good leader. Some go so far as to suggest leadership is genetic by discussing Padme, Anakin (who was Not Great, but did succeed sometimes), etc. but that’s not a thing so I’m not going to. He could have studied them, and maybe he did, but it’s not ‘in his blood’. Leia may have exposed him to some politics, but it’s hard to say. Last Shot suggests he spent most of his time with Han when he was little and we don’t know how young he was when he went to Luke, where he would’ve seen nothing. He could’ve been sent away at 5-6 and never even seen the Senate, or Leia could’ve brought him to Senate meetings regularly so he could learn until he was sent away at 15 or something, but as of now, there’s no proof either way. I mention this because of its popularity, but I don’t personally find the argument convincing either way and I don’t believe we know enough to say for sure

Now Hux, Hux is good at large-scale operations. He’s in charge of the Stormtrooper program, which he adapted from previous methods and has had exactly one aberration slip through the cracks ever. He commands the Finalizer and was chosen to work at the same level as Snoke’s personal apprentice, the two of them sharing second-in-command to Snoke (who appears to do fuck all). He’s also in charge of Starkiller and though there is some debate as to how involved he was with it, he certainly oversaw its construction and usage. Lastly, he also oversees the FO’s entire suite of technological advancement projects, according to TLJ. So Hux already has a lot on his plate that he’s managing and appears to be doing at least reasonably well at these things. Hux can command and organize and I don’t think anyone can dispute that

In terms of flaws, he fails to stop Finn and Poe from escaping partially because Poe is That Good and partially because he overcomplicates it, which tends to be the flaw of all big-picture thinkers (also, some luck on their side, considering they both survived the crash. iirc Poe didn’t in the original script, but Oscar asked JJ to please not make him die this time. So perhaps a bit of Good Guys Need To Win too). Small-scale fucks him up because he makes mountains out of molehills and that’s where he’s weakest, as seen also when Poe comes in with a single ship in TLJ, with the chase of the Raddus, etc. He’s capable of running large-scale operations, as I mentioned above, and while there’s debate on whether or not he’s a good strategist, I tend to lean towards ‘a bit above average’ for no other reason than it feels right to me, but there isn’t really any definitive evidence either way. He is also arguably the least responsible for Starkiller’s destruction; yes, there was a weak point, but it was shielded well and unavoidable to have. Phasma lowering the shields and Kylo not finding the explosives due to family problems are both more responsible than he is, imo

(Hux’s other fatal flaw is his underestimation and low opinion of the Force, which will most likely be what kills him regardless of how things play out, but that’s not terribly relevant to this discussion so)

So, with all that in mind: Supreme Leadering. What does that actually entail? Well, it is large-scale, which gives Hux the advantage based on my arguments, and even if we accept he is completely useless at strategy, there’s just so much more to it than that. The Order is now in control of the galaxy at large and needs to manage it, something Snoke most likely would have delegated based on what little we know of him. There’s making and maintaining trade routes, there’s managing supply lines, there’s bureaucracy, there’s the prioritizing of projects, there’s lawmaking, there’s the managing of staff, citizens, etc. This is essentially nation building we’re talking about here, except on a galactic scale. It’s complex, it’s tedious, and it is a massive undertaking, the kind of thing that Hux seems like the type to masturbate thinking about, given how he appears to thrive when taking care of large projects and also his power fantasies

And when it comes to Kylo? The thing is is that even if he could do it well, even if he could look at the big picture and effectively manage people and all of it, I don’t think he cares to

So not only do I think Kylo is ill-suited to something that large, as I originally discussed, I more importantly think he would hate it. Kylo hating paperwork may be fanon, to my knowledge, but it’s one of those things that no one ever really contests because it fits his character. Kylo is not patient. Kylo does not care about the bigger picture. Kylo is self-centered, as in he is focused only on his own interests, not those of anyone around him, even within an organization he claims to support. “Personal interests”, anyone?

In the TFA novel, it’s noted that Hux refrains from yelling at his staff even when he wants to because he knows it will only stress them out and make them sloppy. Kylo is known to violently attack those under him when he’s upset. So even if Kylo has the troops’ fear, Hux has their loyalty (the TLJ novel disagrees with some of this, most notably concerning the older Imperials, but tbh I doubt JJ is taking that anywhere so I’m ignoring it for now. They’re relics of a dying age, anyways. If I end up being wrong, though, I will adjust haha). Pablo Hidalgo explained on his now-defunct twitter, when asked why Kylo didn’t just rip the location of the Resistance base from Poe’s mind, that the reasoning is that he only wanted the map; the Resistance was Hux’s problem. This is in spite of the fact that the Resistance is the FO’s problem in general and Kylo is not only part of the FO, but a high-ranking member. There is also the failure on Crait, which was legitimately embarrassing, and while, yes, that was largely due to his emotional state, Kylo is in a state of emotional crisis for most of his screentime. So, not exactly a great defending argument. I also strongly suspect that will be a continuing trend with him until his inevitable death and/or redemption

These are not signs of a good leader. I also can’t see Kylo suddenly being interested in building a government, even if he could do it. Because he’s going to be focused on getting revenge on Rey for rejecting him, eliminating any fledgling Jedi Order she may or may not be attempting to make, and possibly a plot with his mother. Kylo’s motives have not and do not align with building a nation and at no point does he even seem to care about that in any capacity that involves actually doing something about it

So. This got really long but the main points here are that Supreme Leadering and military strategy are different skills, Hux and Kylo are good at different things (large-scale vs small-scale), and that even if Kylo could Supreme Leader effectively, he most likely doesn’t care to meanwhile Hux seems like he’d actually be pretty good at it (and, even if you think he wouldn’t be, at least he gives a fuck). So uh, yeah. There’s my significantly more than 2 cents and if you actually read this whole thing, then applause for you because it’s longer than the last fic I posted XD

#I really hope this doesn't come off as aggressive or anything #I really just had thoughts I thought people might be interested in lmao #but yeah anyways hux and kylo are good and bad at different things and also politics exist that's my thesis haha #kylux #kylo ren #general hux #meta #long post #shut up nerd #text

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tepkunset · 7 years ago

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A list of things I liked and didn’t like about The Last Jedi

I know literally everyone has beaten me to the party by now, but I’m gonna do it anyway, just cause I wanna talk about it.

Things I didn’t like:

Poe Dameron is a completely different character. Like the only thing the same is his charisma, which I'm pretty sure is thanks to the actor. And I'm just gonna say it: It's suspicious that this drastic character change is for the benefit of demonstrating heroism for some rando new white woman who dies anyway.

Also the conflict between him and Holdo was so ridiculously artificially created. What actual reason did she have for not telling people the plan? Besides one-upping Poe? Leia then says Holdo “cared more about being a hero than looking like one” but I would disagree--because the only damn conclusion I can come up with for why she wouldn’t tell people what she was doing is to appear superior.

While there were some fleeting scenes where Luke Skywalker felt right, he mostly just felt so off to me, especially his sudden, vague dislike of the Jedi. And are you seriously telling me Luke motherfucking Skywalker was going to murder his nephew??? Because he sensed the dark side in him? He spent most of the original trilogy convinced that Darth Vader could be saved from the dark side, but not some kid?!?!?

But like that’s just it--So much screentime and character continuity flaws were all for the sake of trying to make us pity Kylo Ren. Only to then end the film with the same message we got loud and clear from the last one: He chose the dark side. We get it. We got it the minute he killed Han Solo. It just makes it all the more frustrating that we had to sit through all that BS without any actual story progression.

Finn was majorly sidelined in comparison to the large role he played in TFA. There were a few good “That’s Finn” moments, though. But Finn also apparently had to learn the lesson “you can’t run away from what’s right” all over again too, despite, you know, that being a major point in his character arc in the first movie as well!

Luke says the Jedi should end, but doesn’t ever really get into it? Besides just saying that Jedi are too prideful? Ignoring that Luke would never give up on the Jedi, Rian my dude there is an actual, legitimate list of things you could pull together to make a real case for why the Jedi Order wasn’t so great. But I guess it was just easier to have him constantly interrupted or act illusive.

I can only assume that it was Snoke’s manipulation that was leading Rey to the dark side all of a sudden, since she was so purely, strongly light in the first movie. Like, that was how she defeated Kylo Ren! She finds her focus in the light, where he was unbalanced!

This is something I’ve seen pointed out a lot already, and I’m sure as hell not gonna avoid it either: It’s really suspicious how poorly the characters of colour are treated in this film, in comparison to the white characters. That comparison is important, because a classic defence I always see in any media where lots of people die and get hurt, is that “well it happens to everyone.” Because somehow some (white) people can’t see the disproportions? Or maybe they just don’t look.

The “humour” about the little creatures on the island constantly having to clean up after Rey’s destruction of ancient structures was really uncomfortable.

I am now 100% sure there are no actual rules about what the Force can and can’t do. (But TBH this one doesn’t really bother me that much; the Force has always had evolving lore.)

The screenshots of Kylo Ren’s shirtless scene cannot do justice to how gratuitous and awfully inserted the actual scene is.

I know a lot of people like the porgs but... TBH I found them annoying.

The scene where Kylo Ren and Rey are both trying to reach for the lightsaber with the force doesn’t add up; in the last movie the same thing happened, and it went to Rey without competition--But now it’s portraying them as equal? Rey was deserving of the lightsaber, Kylo Ren was not.

Despite getting to see Rey kick some major ass... TBH the fact that a lot of her story revolves around male characters’ stories just felt like a downgrade from the last film, where her arc was quite independent. It overlapped with the other characters around her, like any good movie with an ensemble cast does, but it was not driven by them.

Almost the entire film felt like filler. I get that the moral of the story is what Yoda says; failure is an important learning tool. But it would have perhaps hit home better if more failure was even in the characters control? The only sense of growth through failure was with Poe, which was a lesson he didn’t even need to learn in the first place except Rian decided to rewrite him entirely so he did.

Things I did like:

Snoke’s shiny gold bathrobe was hilarious to me. Jeff Goldblum from Thor: Ragnarok wore it better.

I am super fucking relieved that the “romance” between Rey and Kylo Ren was drastically overstated by those who actually somehow ship them together. THANK. FUCK. Rey even symbolically closes the door to the Falcon when he tries to reach out to her. Like I said, it frustrated me how bordering total pointlessness the whole thing was between them, I’d rather it be pointless than take Rey in a total 180 degree direction.

R2-D2 showing Luke the recording of Leia in order to try and convince him to help.

When Luke guides Rey through connecting with the Force around the island, and talking about how the Force doesn’t belong to anyone, but is part of everyone and everything, that was really good.

Pretty much everything about Rose, but especially her passion against the rich and corrupt. I can’t wait for more with her.

When Leia uses the force to guide herself back onto the ship.

BB-8′s imitation of the little mouse droids.

When Kylo Ren ignites the lightsaber through that guy’s eye.

Finn’s face-off with Phasma, and the part where her helmet breaks just showing her eye, and she calls him scum, and he so proudly says “Rebel scum.” Like what a power move OMF. And she falls to a fiery death.

The red under the salt was such an aesthetic for that final battle.

When Luke brushes off his shoulder after his Force projection was hit with a billion lasers LMFAO.

The whole stand-off between Luke and Kylo Ren. It reminded me a lot of Obi-Wan and Vader in A New Hope.

Luke's death was a satisfying one. I definitely figured he'd be dying, so I wasn't surprised when it happened. I was just concerned it wouldn't feel... complete? Like you know that feeling when writers kill off characters just for the sake of getting them out of the way, or for shock value? But this really did feel fitting, and it was a beautiful callback to the famous scene in the first movie, where he looks up at the sunset and the music swells like it does.

Poe’s reunion with BB-8, and rubbing BB-8 like a pet.

Rey’s reunion with Finn and the Resistance, oh my gosh. It just felt all the more powerful after Kylo Ren told her she’s nothing and no one cares about her except him, and like, there’s Finn who literally runs to hug her, and she and Leia exchange a knowing, connected look, and she just fits in so well with the whole crew, like, this is her new family. People do care about her.

Anyway, overall I don't regret watching it at all, and I will with certainty watch it again. I just, very plain and simply, did not enjoy it as much as the last one. And I hope the third one gets more of that spark, if you will, back.

#star wars #the last jedi #tlj #tlj spoilers #movie thoughts #anti reylo #whoops this was drafted and forgotten about #anyway here it is a few months late

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brian-wellson · 7 years ago

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What got you into writing? What's your story?

It would be cliché for me to say that I have been writing all my life… cliché, but also true. In order to understand that statement, you have to understand who I am as a person.

I come from a broken home. An actual broken home — my biological parents divorced when I was two or so; I lived with (and was physically and emotionally abused by) my biodad while my mom was in a psychiatric hospital; my biodad told me I was a mistake; and my mom lived with a prostitute because she needed someone to help her make rent. All of this by age five! Books were, by all rights, my only friends. Books were a marker of stability — they were pretty much all I had.

When I had entered kindergarten, I was already reading at the fifth grade level. By the end of that school year, the seventh grade level. Even as a kindergartener, I think I recognized that literacy was imperative, for it was through reading that I could give myself something I was not getting elsewhere. I could play in a peaceful, sun drenched meadow, I could meet dignitaries and nobles and queens and kings, I could be a biological researcher … If I could imagine it, then it would happen. (Reader’s Digest had some amazing coffee table books back then filled with detailed pictures and graphics and flow charts … but, most of all, clear and concise text.)

Anyhow. Around second grade or so, I immersed myself in the Choose Your Own Adventure series (and its compatriot, the Time Machine series). I thought they were amazing. It was then I realized that there were so many different ways to end a story, so many different ways to your demise. I think I liked them so much because the crux of their concept and execution hinges on personal choice; the books were comprised of short vignettes, and every short vignette was accompanied by a choice at the vignette’s end. That choice would send you to a different part of the book, down a new line of inquiry. Retrospectively, I see my child’s reasoning — if I could not control things at home, then I would seek it out elsewhere. Lo and behold, I was given control in the form of books! The choices I made actually mattered! I was hooked, and read every book many times over. I found myself wanting more of them, but none in that series were to be had; I was reading them too quickly, and my pace overtook new book drops.

Concomitant with reading the aforementioned series, I began to staple little books together. They were made of college-ruled notebook paper. As you can no doubt guess, I modelled my own writing off that in which I had immersed myself. I think the first ‘book’ I ever wrote was entitled “The Lost Gold of the Seneca”. I’m originally from upstate New York, and we are pretty steeped in Iroquois culture; as a child, the Seneca tribe fascinated me. Well, I had my culture… what about the plot? The plot was based off a myth my grandfather had told me about an old, abandoned lead mine in the southwestern Catskills. So I merged the lead mine myth with Seneca culture, and made my own story. Of course there was no gold to be had in real life… but I was only eight. A writer typically writes about the things with which they have familiarity. And, like I said, I was eight. (I wonder if that little book, written on scraps of stapled notebook paper, is laying around anywhere?)

When I was 12 (1991), my mom had several psychotic breaks. She became violent and delusional. My reading habits had, of course, grown along with me over time. I had just finished Tom Clancy’s Hunt for Red October and Patriot Games. (I was also an avid reader of comic books, though they did not figure into anything. I just liked Spider-Man, The Fantastic Four, and Infinity Gauntlet. They were so fun to read!)

As my mom battled her mental health issues, my stepfather searched frantically for job following his layoff from a defence contractor… all while I had to contend with being — well, bad things would happen to me when I would visit my biodad.

High school was a difficult transition for me. My mom, stepfather, and I moved from our creepy ass apartment in the bad part of town to a complex close to the high school on the hill; our complex was in the nicest part of town. Somehow the rent was cheaper… well, not somehow, it was about two-thirds the size of what we’d had before. I was small and awkward. I read books. I was a musician. Accusations of homo- and bisexuality were levelled at me, and I was bullied relentlessly as a result (high school was much different in the 1990s… ‘boys will be boys’ was still the norm, and bullying was not that big of a deal). You can imagine how that went — a poor, artistic kid who kept to himself, and was socially awkward, and slapped with the label of – as they would say – “being a queer”? During my walks home from school, rocks and bottles would be hurled at me from passing cars along with derogatory taunts about my mom, my stepfather, and me. What friends I had were people of convenience, people in my orbit. One of them even shot me with a BB gun once just because he thought it would be fun. (Hint: it wasn’t.)

So I took control.

The resultant novella I wrote was sprawling, a true epic of ambition. 150 pages. Gunfights, a conflicted sniper, the mafia, international jewel thieves, a corrupt cop, the mass media, a jet ski pursuit down raging rapids, Army Rangers, and international, multicultural government agents. Oh — and a town levelled in the third act by gunfire and bombs and grenades and an exploding helicopter shot down with a Stinger missile. All of the novella’s characters were metonymic for people I knew in real life. This was my attempt to put them into the slots as I saw them: hero, villain, bystander, enabler, or something in between. This was my attempt at control. I left it open for a sequel, but it never materialized. The novella itself took about 1.5 years to crank out (on a word processor; we did not have a computer in our house until I was a senior). Not bad for a 12-year-old. I was proud of that manuscript. I am still proud of it… in fact, it’s one of the few artifacts I have kept from those horrible adolescent years; the sole copy sits with my other archival materials from later in life (like my ballets and my flute concerto/dissertation). Who knows. If I ever write a novel, perhaps I will use that plot.

With college came baggage, and with baggage came a downward spiral of my own mental health. I ended up functionally homeless for a couple of months… I was not allowed to be around the house when my parents were home, but I could clean myself up and catch some sleep during the day. That summer (1999), I started an Angelfire online journal, one that was modelled after my best friend’s. She and I were in a very similar space, and it seemed to help her out, so I decided to try it; to tell you our state of mind, my favourite line I had written from that time: ‘I wish I was a river rat’. My best friend had been thrown out by her dad, so, that summer, we had each other’s backs: sleeping under bridges, dumpster diving for cans and bottles and trinkets, selling trash at yard sales, eating from abandoned room service trays. Things were bad, but we still had our words – I still had my words.

Every day for a year (1999-2000), I updated that online journal. Over that span, I welcomed more and more followers — so many followers that had I to buy my own domain and server space (2000-2004). The domain hosted not only my own online journal, but those of others, as well. That core of people, we became our own community, and exchanged stories with each another across the continent. We organized an epic meet up, and people from up and down the Eastern Seaboard showed up. In fact, I am still in contact with several of the other online journalers. My site won a “Best of the Web” award, an award I had not sought, nor did I necessarily think I deserved, but one which made me happy. The site was a true labour of love: all of the HTML & CSS coding was written by me (in Notepad), all of the photos were digitally rendered by me, and all of the written (and musical) content was written by me. I even had a live streaming cam for the semester when I reënrolled. (And yes, there were watchers.)

I kept that online journal for years; eventually the constant maintenance became too much for me to handle. I needed to bang out my Masters (including thesis!) in a year, and went straight on to my doctoral program (2004). Writing fell by the wayside for many years…

…and then I had an accident which rendered me neurologically and physically compromised (2010). I couldn’t work, and I hated doing nothing, so I went back to school (2012-2016), and started down a path of study which has proven to be generous to me.

If you had told that disabled guy of four years ago that he would be offered an MFA slot at many different & prestigious schools to study Creative Nonfiction, he would have laughed at you.

If you had told the little, socio-economically disadvantaged teenager from a broken home that he would be offered a slot at an ivy for graduate school, he probably would have tried to kick your ass … it had been accepted that those things weren’t meant for people like him — for people like me. We don’t get to do that, we don’t belong there. This is a belief that still haunts today for many different reasons. That said:

I believe education is the great equalizer. Knowledge, wisdom, and literacy are the things that grant equity in our culture. Yes, it is used as a weapon by some; yes, it is also used as a form of control.

But that control was mine to take. I had no other option. So, I seized it.

That just about sums it up. These are the stories and reasons why I write, why I read, and why I care so very much about literacy. These are the reasons why I care about all of the writing I read on this site every single day. Each person has it in their power to craft a good story, and each story has the potential to change the way a person sees themselves and the world around them.

These are things I believe to be true.

Thank you for such a lovely ask.

(( @alastar-wyatt ))

#Alastar Wyatt #OoC #Author

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whittlebaggett8 · 6 years ago

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14 celebrities who are obsessed with ‘Star Wars’, Defence Online

If you love Obi-Wan Kenobi and BB-8, you’re not alone.

From Stephen Colbert to Joseph Gordon-Levitt, INSIDER rounded up stars who love Chewie, R2-D2, and lightsabers just as much as you. Some of them even like to dress up as their favorite characters.

Visit INSIDER’s homepage for more stories.

The “Star Wars” fandom knows no bounds. So, of course, many celebrities are obsessed with a galaxy far, far away.

From Princes William and Harry to cosplaying actors, here are celebrities you didn’t know were obsessed with “Star Wars.”

Madison Malone Kircher contributed to a previous version of this story.

Kevin Smith said visiting the “Star Wars” set made him cry.

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We get it. Any fan would get teary-eyed visiting the set.

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Today/YouTube

When “Star Wars: The Force Awakens” director invited Smith to visit the film’s set in England, Smith took him up on the offer.

Smith posted a teary-eyed Instagram picture and said being on set made him feel young again.

“When I was a kid, I liked ‘Star Wars,’ and now I’m on the ‘Star Wars’ set,” the actor told the LA Times of the experience. “The moment I stepped on the Millennium Falcon 10 years dropped off my life.”

“Harry Potter” star Daniel Radcliffe also visited the set of “The Force Awakens.”

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Radcliffe has dressed up as Boba Fett before.

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Warner Bros. Television

Radcliffe became a “Star Wars” fan late in life, but when he did he fell in love with the movies. He told Conan O’Brien he crashed the set of the “The Force Awakens” because he knew most of the Potter crew was working on the film.

Radcliffe also dressed up as Boba Fett for a Halloween episode of “The Ellen Show.”

Tina Fey has a love for all things Leia.

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Don’t question Fey’s love for “Star Wars.”

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Getty

When Tina Fey walked down the aisle as Liz Lemon in the last season of “30 Rock,” it was dressed in Princess Leia’s classic white robe and twin hair buns.

“It’s the only white dress I own,” Lemon quips.

In real life, Fey was spotted wearing a “Vote Princess Leia” shirt on “Saturday Night Live” in 2008.

Joseph Gordon-Levitt appeared in the latest movie.

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This is how you dress to a premiere.

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Getty

Gordon-Levitt attended “The Force Awakens” premiere dressed in a homemade costume. His Yoda-inspired look included green face-paint and a pair of verdant “How the Grinch Stole Christmas” pajama pants.

Maybe that helped him land a cameo in “The Last Jedi” alongside director Rian Johnson, who he worked with in the past.

Olivia Munn has shown off her love for “Star Wars” movie on social media.

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Olivia Munn’s love for “Star Wars” goes way back.

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Bryan Bedder/ Getty Images

Munn posted an Instagram of her and Green Bay Packers’ quarterback boyfriend Aaron Rodgers in “Star Wars” gear.

“Who’s the bigger #StarWars fan…The one who bought this awesome shirt at @oldnavy or the one who already owned his own Obi-Wan Kenobi robe?”

Munn has previously been spotted dressed as Princess Leia, complete with the infamous “Slave Leia” bikini.

“Star Wars” is a family affair for Rainn Wilson.

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Kevin Winter/Getty Images

Wilson attended the “Star Wars: The Force Awakens” premiere in Hollywood with his son Walter, who dressed as bounty hunter Boba Fett.

Seth Rogen wanted a role in “Star Wars: The Force Awakens.”

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Now, he just needs a cameo.

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Steve Jennings/Getty Images

“The Interview” star told MTV he wanted to play the alien Watto in the new film.

“I’m campaigning to play that Jewish alien who built those robots in the George Lucas [prequels],” Rogen joked to MTV in 2014. “If you’re reprising the anti-Semitic Jewish flying alien creature, please consider me.”

Check out his spot on Watto impression here.

Mindy Kaling is a secret “Star Wars” fan.

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Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images for Disney

Kaling totally trolled “Star Wars” fans on “The Tonight Show” by pretending to know absolutely nothing about the intergalactic franchise.

In reality, “The Mindy Project” star is actually a big fan of the series, and even moderated a panel with the cast of “Star Wars: The Force Awakens” earlier this December.

Stephen Colbert says he’s the original “Star Wars” fan.

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This was very important to him.

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The Colbert Report/Comedy Central

In 1977, a young Colbert won two tickets to see the original “Star Wars” movie two weeks before it opened in theaters.

“I have been a ‘Star Wars’ fan two weeks longer than any of you,” said Colbert in 2014.

He also battled fellow talk show host Jon Stewart for the title of “Biggest Star Wars Fan,” and when the first trailers for “The Force Awakens” came out he explained why the three-pronged lightsaber was the perfect design.

Megan Fox thinks her life size R2-D2 is cool.

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Do you own an R2-D2?

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Frazer Harrison/Getty Images

Megan Fox isn’t a big Twitter user, but back in 2013, the actress used the platform to show her inner “Star Wars” fan.

“Is it cool or embarrassing to own a life size R2-D2? It’s cool right?…Right?!,” Fox tweeted along with this picture of the giant droid.

Anna Kendrick talks “Star Wars” on Twitter.

In 2014, Kendrick tweeted a picture after meeting “the badass” Carrie Fisher. The actress also starred in a commercial for “Star Wars” video game “Battlefield,” yielding a kitchen knife as a faux-lightsaber.

When the “Star Wars: The Force Awakens” trailer dropped, Kendrick took to Twitter to express her excitement.

“‘There’s a new Star Wars trailer! EVERYBODY SHUT UP THERE’S A NEW STAR WARS TRAILER!’ – me being professional on set today,” the actress tweeted.

Simon Pegg had a cameo in “The Force Awakens” after being a lifelong fan.

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Pegg on set of “The Force Awakens.”

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Lucasfilm/Disney

“I can mark out my life . . . in terms of my relationship with that film,” Pegg told the Guardian in 2010 of the first film being released when he was eight.

Pegg finally got the chance to live out his dream of being in a “Star Wars” movie. He played alien Unkar Plutt in “The Force Awakens.”

Princes William and Harry shot scenes to be in “The Last Jedi” and visited the set.

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Of course, they got a photo with everyone on set.

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Adrian Dennis/Getty Images

The brothers didn’t just stop by the set of the movie in 2016. John Boyega confirmed Prince William and Prince Harry filmed cameos as Stormtroopers during an interview with BBC Radio 4.

Unfortunately, the duo didn’t make it into the final film.

The post 14 celebrities who are obsessed with ‘Star Wars’, Defence Online appeared first on Defence Online.

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#Celebrities #Features #Lucasfilm #Movie #News #Star Wars

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