#in bed going to sleep but my brain was like gotta let the besties know we just hung out for a bit

[im-still-watching-anime]

binging anime kinda slaps even more since i started this blog because it feels like im hanging out with you guys

[honoviadakai]

Rating the Hazbin crew based on how well they’ll take care of you when you’re sick 🤒

Charlie🎶🏨:

8/10

So letting Charlie know you’re sick might actually be a bigger health concern for her than it is for you

She’s gonna act like you’re dying

She legitimately might make Razzle and Dazzle plan for a funeral

You are now gonna be on house arrest

No

Scratch that

You’re on bed arrest!

No getting up under any circumstances! 😤

She’s wait on you hand and foot till you’re 1000% better

She’s gonna be overbearing but in her defense, she REALLY doesn’t want you to suffer/die so please just bare with her

She just wants you to recover asap ;3;

Vaggie🗡️🦋:

7/10

Ok so on one hand…her chicken soup is pretty good

On the other hand…she’s a very “tough love” kinda gal to anyone who isn’t named Charlie Morningstar

It dose not help that she’s canonically Latina…

All my fellow Latinos know, if you get sick…you get the vaporub

And that is probably something Vaggie still firmly believes in

“Just rub some raporub on your chest and nose and walk it off, you’ll be good in no time!”

Said every Latino parent in history….

She’s probably never had to take care of many sick people in her human life, let alone her afterlife in hell

Cut her a bit of slack and just use the vaporub, she’s trying damn it!

Alastor🦌📻:

-12/10

N O

WHY WOULD YOU EVER COME TO THIS MAN FOR MEDICAL HELP!?!

Do you have a death wish or something!?

Best case scenario, he’ll help you but your soul is gonna be on the line for a while!

Worst case scenario, he’s just gonna let you suffer

And I don’t mean that he’s just gonna leave you to sleep in your room

No no no, that too boring

He’s gonna make sure no one else in the hotel knows of your predicament and he’s gonna watch you struggle and laugh at your misery…

For the love of all that is good in the universe…don’t let him know you’re sick…ever.

Angel Dust🕷️💕:

6/10

Ok

Listen…he’s not the worst option….but you do have better options

The problem asking Angel to help you when you’re sick is that you’re sick…

You’re gross…he doesn’t want not on his fluff

But if y’all are very close…

Like besties or lovers? That changes the game

He’ll cuddle you, no questions asked

So it really depends on who you are to him how much effort he’s gonna put in

He’s also kinda forgetful

For example, if you ask him for a cup of tea, he’ll absolutely go brew a cup for you

But you better pray that nothing and no one distracts him!

Cuz otherwise just forget about having hot tea or tea in general…

He’s pretty shit at remembering to take medication at certain times too so I’d set multiple reminders

Even then…might not help much…

He is a pretty good cook though so rest assured, you will be very well fed during your recovery period

Husk🐈‍⬛🥃:

10/10

Will this crusty old man complain about having to help you? Yes.

Will he bitch and moan every time you ask him for another cup of tea? Absolutely.

Will he curse under his breath while holding your hair back as you puke your brains out for the 10th time in the past 24 hours? Without question.

But he’s still fucking helping you

He can say whatever the hell he wants, he’s waiting on you hand and foot till you’re better of his own volition

He’s out here making some of the best damn soup you’ve ever had he’s gonna make sure you finish every last spoonful god damn it!

If you gotta take medication on a schedule, best believe he’s setting multiple timers

You’re also taking all the naps you need, no arguments! 😤

If you ask, he will cuddle you, but he will make you swear on your mother’s grave that you won’t tell a soul he did that for you

He’d rather chop his arms off than admit this, but he is genuinely worried for you and just wants you to recover

You did not hear that from me though 🤐

Niffty🪡🐞:

5/10

Oh she makes some of the best soup! 🥣

Her home cooked meals are delicious

Honestly the best part of having Niffty taking care of you is just how well fed you’re gonna be 🥰

But this is Nifty we’re talking about…

So she’s gonna be….Nifty….

She’s gonna hover uncomfortably close to the bed while you rest…

Just…watching you…

She’s not even trying to be creepy or anything

She’s just making sure you’re ok

But like…she’s starting a little too intensely at you…not blinking even once…

She’s just waiting to see if you want tea or something tbh

She just forgot you’re supposed to blink

She’ll also just watch you sleep

Not sure why…she just does

If she’s feeling ✨spicy✨…she miiight give you some questionable medicine…

Like, medicine she found in Alastor’s room….

Please get an actual doctor 🙏

Sir Pentious🐍🥚:

2/10

No

Just…no

Get an actual doctor

Please!

He means well

He really does!

But this man died in the Victorian era!

Don’t let a man with medical knowledge form the Victorian era help you!

He will use leeches on you!

And that’s the best case scenario for you!

And for the love of all that is good in the world, do NOT let the egg boys help!

They all share a brain cell between them and I don’t think any of them is ever fully away of where it is at any given moment

They’re likely to take one look at you and think the best way to reduce your fever is to stick you in an ice bath…for hours….

Go to an actual doctor if you wanna keep your ability to breathe. Please.🙏

[fire-but-ashes-too]

SOOOOOO

i was tagged by @rickie-the-storyteller over heeeereeee and it didnt let me reblog so new post!

LAFGSLKRGHLSKGH THIS IS SO FUN HELP WHY DIDNT I KNWO THIS EXISTED-

ANYWAYSSSSS

i gto very little ships (sadly) so im gonna go with both platonic and romantic ehehehe

Annexander (is it how were calling it?? idk) (@holdmyteaplease ur the expert on this give me a feedback)

Alexander: Think you can answer some questions without the usual level of sarcasm? Anne: If you can ask the questions without the usual level of stupid.

Alexander: *shatters a window and climbs through it* Alexander: *turns around and helps Anne through it* Breaking and entering is wrong Anne. Anne: Okay. Anne: Shut it Alexander, I only shook your hand because I had to. We will NEVER be friends. Alexander: Lets survive this together! Anne: I HOPE YOU DIE. Anne: Fellas, I gotta know for science. Is the opposite of red green or blue? Alexander: Technically a mix of green and blue? Anne: So blurple. Alexander: That's implying you're mixing blue and purple. Anne: Would you rather have fucking bleen? MOTHERFUCKING GRUE? Alexander: You were confusing before but now I'm scared Anne, holding a scooter: Alexander! Can I go outside and play with this? Alexander: Sure, whatever. I'm not your parent, okay? Anne, running outside: Thanks Alexander! Alexander, running out after them and screaming: NOT ON THE STREET! STAY AWAY! Alexander: It’s quick, it’s easy, and it’s free: pouring river water in your socks! Anne: Why would I do that? Alexander: It’s quick, it’s easy, and it’s free!

HELP CAUSE WHY IS THIS SO THEMMMM AKFGASKJGF

Anne and Indigo (the absolute besties)

Anne: So... what would you do if you were in bed with me? Indigo: Depends. Is your bed comfortable? Anne: Yes. Indigo: I'd sleep.

*Anne sends more than 5 messages in a row* Indigo: I ain’t reading all that. Indigo: I’m happy for you tho. Indigo: Or sorry that happened. Anne: I have a plan. Indigo: Good! As long as we aren’t breaking the law again, I’m open to hearing it. Anne: … Indigo: … Anne: I no longer have a plan.

Anne: Oh, so when crows remember people who wronged them and hold grudges, its “intelligent” and “really cool”. Anne: But when I do it, I’m “petty” and “need to let it go”.

ok... this is scarily accurate...

Alexis and Claire (friends to lovers complete dumbasses edition)(they have exactly 1 brain cell and they take turns being the responsible one. most times i gets forgotten at home)

Alexis: My hands are cold. Claire: Here, let me hold them. Alexis: My lips are cold too. Claire: *covers Alexis's mouth with their hand* Alexis: You’d be stupid to lay a hand on me. Claire: Oh, you’d be surprised how much stupid shit I do. Claire: You either buckle down and do your work or you’ll end up at McDonalds. Alexis: We're going to McDonalds if I don't do my work? Claire: NO- Alexis: What do you do for a living? Claire: I exist against my will. Alexis: Claire, I have a question. Claire: What is it, Alexis? Alexis: What color is an orange? Claire: Alexis, you bonehead! Its color is the same as its name. Just like a lemon. Alexis: I hope no one lowkey hates me. Alexis: Highkey hate me. Hate me with every fiber of your being. Alexis: Go big or go home.

THIS IS FUN. VERY FUN.

HOW TO CREATE CHARACTERS 101: NAME, BASIC VIBES AND THROW THEM AROUND IN THE INCORRECT QUOTES GENERATOR✨

tagging literally everyone i know on this one cause the world deserves to do this

@olivescales3 @albatris @bloody-neon @bassguitarinablackt-shirt @briannaswords @cabbojage @daisywords @desastreus @did-i-do-this-write @deanwax @digital-chance @enchanted-lightning-aes @ember-writer @eli-is-an-idiot @firesmokeandashes @fioreshere @guessillcallitart @gwenthekween @harleyacoincidence @holdmyteaplease @iannicellis @jaxypaxyhaxy @j3st3rfun3r4l @kooperation1101 @koala2all @lycaens @liv-is @lyonette-does-things @mayakern @nocturnalmohawk @quinnharperwrites @roisinivy @raspberrykraken @spicymochi @scifimagpie @the-mindless @unmellowyellowfellow @whynotcherries @writingmargo @writing-with-sophia @writeblr-of-my-own @wrenofthewords @yeahthatswhatimtolkienabout @yesireadbooks @your-absent-father @zihus @zillanovikov sorry if i tagged any

[chiliiscereal]

Okay, apparently my brain has nothing better to do, so I got a SINGLE prompt for ya. U ready?

...✨Living with the turtles✨

Rottmnt headcanon: living with the turtles

———

-living with the turtles is both fun and... not XD

-lets be really, Mikeys an early bird!

-you simply can’t sleep in past 8 there’s just no way

-Mikey wakes up every morning like it’s Christmas

-“there’s stuff to do today! You can’t be a slug and stay in bed! Move move move!”

-lots of jumping on your bed until you wake up

-usually everyone eating breakfast together is not a thing, as everyone is usually doing their own thing

-but if you cook anything you better be ready for all the turtles to ask for some

-you’re also now the honorary judge for literally every single competition

-need someone to judge who can do the best kick flip?

-you’re their human

-need someone to see who can balance more fridge items on your chin?

-there you are

-lots of working with splinter in that field

-you’re also the one who anyone else goes to for validation

-for some reason you can’t understand, they can never compliment each other’s work

-“hey I need you to look this over, tell me if there’s anything wrong with it, possibly-.”

-“compliment you about your work?”

-“well, if you insist.”

-will drag you to his lab or drag his lab work to you so you can admire it

-doesn’t matter if you’re reading or sleeping

-when he’s ready for you to see it then you’re ready to see it

-“it’s literally 1 am.”

-“come on get up I need you to compliment my work!”

-“alright just stop pulling on me!”

-as for GIVING attention he’s not very good at it

-he’ll try, that’s for sure

-but heaven knows he won’t compliment you to your face

-the only physical affection you receive is if he goes to you first for help

-“I only need you because I need you to hold these wires and you have more fingers than you know what to do with.”

-it’s not just Donnie though.

-it’s Mikey as well

-“look at what I drew!”

-“wow this is awesome! How long did it take?”

-“oh... about an hour?”

-“that’s really good!”

-“really?”

-will even ask you to put it on the fridge

-you give in and get a bulletin board in your room for him to pin all his work

-it’s covered with his drawings by the end of the week

-needs lots and lots of hugs

-randomly jumps on your back for a piggy back ride

-you gotta be ready for him at any given moment or else you’re both gonna end up on the floor

-and who could forget Leo

-not you that’s for sure

-he’s make sure you’d never forget he needed attention

-Leo’s definetely the type of guy to get ready to pull a stunt and dedicate it to you before doing it

-“for Y/n’s honor!”

-“Leo you’re gonna break you’re neck if you do that!”

-“it’s for your honor so it’s okay!”

-jumps out from every corner to scare you

-can never seem to get you to flinch

-this boy’s gonna get you to jump one day though

-don’t be surprised if he walks up next to you and just casually rests his elbow on your head or drapes an arm over your shoulder

-will randomly poke your side just to see you jump

-Raphs no better than his brothers in the attention department

-especially with weight lifting

-“5...6...7 *notices you walk in* 37...38...39...”

-he doesn’t go around giving affection like Leo and Mikey though

-his love language is helping with anything you need, such as as helping you reach a high shelf

-very comfortable just picking you up and moving you out of the way

-doesn’t matter if it’s to get you out of danger or if you’re blocking his way to the pizza that just arrived

-only responsible roommate out of the four

-only one that washes the dishes

-video games all the time

-you can’t live with the turtles without liking video games

-you and Mikey bake and cook all the snacks for video game night

-of course, Leo also has a rivalry with you

-not one like the old rivalry between Leo and Raph in other versions no no

-it’s the playful “hey wanna take me in hockey? I bet I’ll wiiiiinnnn~” or “I’m gonna best you at this and you’re gonna go crying to splinter!”

-winner gets bragging rights

- you also can’t live in the lair without being besties with April

-come on, she’s cool as hell!

-she’s the one you talk to about human problems or just complaining about the turtles in general

-nosey boys

-very very nosey

-there’s no way to have secrets in this lair

-you have a diary?

-expect Leo to go through it in one night

-you read fanfiction or write fanfiction?

-oh Donnies keeping tabs on each chapter

-he’s updated all your tech, he can definetely see what you look up and access it from his computer

-hey, living with them isn’t always going to be sunshine and rainbows

-you’ll always find Mikey in your room admiring any decorations or books

-he’s constantly borrowing your stuff and not asking

-Raph is probably the only one that understands personal space

-...unless it comes to him worrying about you when you leave the lair

-will text you all the time, asking if you’re okay, even if you’re just hanging with a friend or going to the store

-since they always invade your privacy, they always know if you aren’t feeling okay

-the moment you step foot in the lair they’re asking what happened

-and if you try to say there’s nothing wrong oh ho ho ho you’re in for it

-Donnie is pulling up articles, Mikey is bugging you, Leo is trying to activate his face man powers, and Raph is sitting in front of you and asking what’s up

- the only privacy invading they do that you actually enjoy is when you’re in your room at like, midnight, watching a movie

-you’ll be watching peacefully and then Mikey just appears in the doorway

-he’s got blankets and he’s got snacks

-you just wave him over and let him sit on your bed

-then Leo shows up, no offering other than his presence

-don’t bother trying to push him away he’s gonna watch that movie with you and Mikey even if it kills him

-once you three are settled, Donnie shows up with a movie projector so you don’t have to watch on a tiny phone

-he ends up staying, even though he denied that he would

-Raph shows up with pillows for everyone, the only turtle to actually ASK to join

-you can’t say no to the giant teddy bear

-you may have started off by yourself in your dark room but you ended in a giant cuddle puddle with your roommates

-sometimes though you don’t have time to hang out with them

-school

-school happens

-you have to deny them because of homework

-Mikey will help you with flash cards, decorating them so they’re fun and make learning interesting

-Donnie studies with you and probably knows the material better

-he’ll help you so it’ll be over faster

-Raph is simply your company

-he’ll sit quietly in your room and play relaxing music, offering any advice or comments he had

-Leo just tries to convince you to ignore it

-it’ll still be there tomorrow! As of right now, he needs you to watch the skating tournament with him

-once you’ve got everything done you’re immediately dragged into whatever shenanigans they’ve got going on

-you’re also the self appointed camera man, using your phone to capture every harebrained plan AND failure

-living with them isn’t always sunshine and rainbows, but it sure is never boring

Sorry this is all I got!

If anyone has any headcanon or oneshot requests send em my way!

[ushiwakaout]

I just read your story about kenma as a husband and im OBSESSED. Can you do the same but with Kuroo please! I love them both and i cant chose so- :)))

I cant choose either don’t worry (i’m a kenma kinny so like... you know)

HUSBAND KUROO IS A BLESSING GOD

let’s just say you’re a highschool teacher

for the sake of the headcannon, you wear glasses to read

very outgoing

very flaunty husband

very flirty, acts as if you guys aren’t married and still trying to reel you into his hook

Wakes up very very early

Maybe like 5 am, works out, rare occasion will wake you up too if he’s feeling like a jerk

if he doesn’t wake you up, he’s back from his run and he’s bought you flowers, will willingly cut his run short so he doesn’t ruin the flowers

KUROO IS AN AMAZING COOK

does not look like it tho, first time he cooked for you- wow, crazy good

breakfast in bed when you have the day of (which are weekends)

Kuroo doesn’t have a day off but his mornings are always free, for you and you only.

He’s the type of husband who you catch making breakfast and he’s dancing, wearing a kiss your sempai apron

“oh no no, you go back to bed, i’m making you breakfast, shoo.”

will tap your ass so you leave the kitchen faster

his brain malfunctions just a lil in the kitchen when realized that you’re only wearing his button up and his button up only

blushing mess while cooking

HE GETS A LITTLE SHY FOR NO REASON WHEN HES BRINGING YOU BREKFAST

You’re fully awake and already looking through homework with you’re cute little glasses that make your eyes look a little bit bigger

he’s so in awe with you, he puts the little breakfast tray over you and kisses your nose

“Goodmorning sweets.”

Doesn’t call you kitten but calls you sweety, sweets, sugar, shortcake. HONEY, SUNSHINE.

He will not bother you if you’re doing paperwork

Believe it or not Kuroo very much likes peace and quiet

because you know, his bed head is bc hed cover his ear w his hair to try and muffle out his parents arguing sorry

Will not argue with you

PHYSICALLY WILL NOT AS MUCH AS HE WANTS TO

you could be yelling at him over something (most likely because kuroo is def burnt out a little and gets no sleep) and you’re just looking up at him and he can’t look away

Will say something like “You look so beautiful.”

My heart just broke a little- Kuroo can’t argue back with you because he knows you’re right most of the time

you’ll find him asleep on his desk at 2am bc you miss cuddling and the mother fucker still wakes up at 5

will show up to your classroom with a bouquet of [favorite flowers] and all the girls in the class start squealing

kisses you behind the flowers

will plant his forehead in yours and whisper “I love you.” before apologizing and dismissing himself

this rich cocky mother fucker will also surprise you on your birthday, which would end up on a weekday.

YOURE CLASSROOM IS FULL OF FLOWERS

EVERY DESK FOR THE BOYS/GIRLS/NONB and they get to keep them

TEACHERS ARE ENVIOUS, especially the women maybe the men are too, ya never know.

he’s a certified sub teacher bc you get sick easily and will cover for you while someone covers for him at work bc he’s like- light years ahead of his work (that’s why he’s so burnt out)

SICK KUROO IS PROBABLY THE SADDEST AND MOST ADORABLE THING

It gets pretty bad when he’s late for work one day and he’s like rushing to get ready and he gets a nose bleed

he’s freaking out and you’re like “baby lay down, you have a fever, please.”

“Fever? What the fuck is a fever, never heard of them, now let me go to work.”

“Honey, don’t make me any soup, your cooking isn’t as good as mine.”

“No get away from me, i don’t want you getting sick.”

“I wanna kiss you so bad right now, give me you’re hand.”

“I love you so much, you know that right?”

Once he’s out of his fever will take you out to dinner as a thank you

Buys you a new outfit for your outing and it’s like “Kuroo come on- i don’t need this.”

“Well i need you to have it, if you complain- then you don’t love me.”

“fine....”

very jealous man, if someone eyes you

very very handsy

hand has to be on your ass, lower back, hip, holding your hand. he gotta be touching you somehow

ESPECIALLY IN WORK OUTINGS

whole new outfit again

would probably fuck you in the venue bathroom but we don’t talk about that

if he gets drunk he’s actually the opposite

he’s not horny or handsy

he gets all cute and shy and a little awkward

Will forget your his spouse and be like “No! You see this ring, that’s right! I’m married and to the most sexiest bitch you know- That’s right i called my spouse a bitch, what about it. She’s a bad bitch.”

this mother fucked have you a ruby ring, you can’t tell me otherwise.

something simple but very pretty

he’d probably think you stole your own ring

“Hey! That’s my spouses give me that”

“Kuroo I. AM. YOUR. SPOUSE. LOOK AT ME!”

squints bc this motherfucker actually needs glasses “BABY!! There was some crazy person, who looked just like you! Same exact ring and everything.”

“Baby that was me, you called me a bad bitch.”

“Yeah? Am i wrong? or?”

Big cuddler

Will kiss you everywhere

“Baby, kenma hasn’t called me today, does he hate me?”

“No kuroo.”

“Are you sure?”

“Baby i’m sure.”

You make kenma come the next day because you know Kuroo needs his bestie

they get drunk

Kenma gets cuddly too

they will sleep on the floor together

You make kuroo cary kenma to bed bc he things it’s you and he sleeps w him

wakes up to yell at you and very hung over

“Sometimes i think you wish i married kenma.”

“You’re not wrong.”

OVERALL kuroo as a husband is... *chef kiss*

[skzfairies]

sooyoung’s relationship with nct dream!

✿ mark

he was actually the first one to introduce himself to her in the dreamies

he was really sweet towards her but wasn’t like, over the top, he was kinda chill yk

and that just made her feel so comfortable because she had so many worries about joining nct dream as a girl, she knew monique would also be there, but they weren’t in the same unit so it was very nerve racking for sooyoung

and this girl was like, 15 and she was being thrown into debut suddenly with a bunch of boys, and it was very overwhelming

but mark assured her that it was all okay, and that everyone wanted her there, and that she deserved to be here

if she was ever having any problems with anything, he would always try his best to help her out, or direct her to someone he knew would help her

and now they are the bestest friends, sooyoung admitted that out of the members he feels like an older brother the most to her :D

their always goofing off or messing around, but not like bouncing off the walls together, they just make jokes to each other and burst out laughing

they have so so many inside jokes omg

and whenever they randomly make eye contact, they would always burst out laughing, they literally can NOT be serious around each other ....

mark is basically the reason she knows so much english 😭 she literally just repeats whatever he says and then studies it later....that’s basically how she learned lmaooooo

✿ renjun

renjun ALWAYS clowns her, like she could just be breathing and he would make fun of her (all jokes ok he loves her)

and she’s just like .... did i ask

but she always gets him back :D

she doesn’t roast him, but rather she EMBARRASSES him

if renjun teased her a lot in a video that was uploaded fhat day, she would go on vlive and tell a VERY embarrassing story of renjun and go in COMPLETE detail and then she’s done she’s like “how are you guyssss?”

once renjun saw that she was doing that and he went to where ever she was and complained about it and she just laughed at him while he was begging her to stop 😭

they love each other i promise

they also play fight a lot, like they could just randomly be hanging out in the living room and they would just randomly start fighting each other until they called a truce

sooyoung always wins ☺️, you gotta learn a few tricks if you spend the majority of your time with seven boys

also, when sooyoung got confindent and comfortable with speaking some mandarin, she randomly started speaking it renjun

and he was SO touched like 🤞 he was in shock he was like “when did you- how- what?” and she was just like “ i wanted to learn some so i can talk to you and chenle, i don’t know much but it’s a start!”

and renjun just hugged her, he didn’t know what to say and he was like I LOVE THIS GIRL SO MUCH

no bcuz sooyoung literally deserves the world okay shes so sweet

and renjun would teach her and help her practice when he saw her studying and they just have little conversations with each other in mandarin, and it’s so cute hehe

oh yeah stargazing is a thing for them heeh, when neither of them can sleep because their stressed or it’s just not happening, they both go outside and attempt to watch the stars, even if you can barely see them since their in the city :/

✿ jeno

GAMING BESTIES

they stay up so late playing games whenever they are off and always regret it in the mornings 😭

when she first started playing games w him she was rlly bad and jeno would always beat her and he was SO SMUG ABOUT IT and he was like “haha loser💪”

and sooyoung being the hard worker she is, she practiced her gaming skills for a few months and watched a ton of vids and jeno would ask her to game and she was like “no, not yet.” “i’m kidding your not a loser!” “i’m not playing w u until i can beat ur ass!”

and then a few months later she finally asked him to play

and jeno was like YAY ☺️☺️

and he kept on hyping himself up,,, and then sooyoung beat him

she ended up beating him 4/6 times they played 🤞

JENO WAS SO SHOCKED

HE WAS SO HEARTBROKEN

and sooyoung was just like :))) it’s okay jeno, maybe next time!” and she skipped out of his room happily while jeno was still like :0

he sat there in shock for awhile...

song writing besties 🤞

he actually helped her a lot when she was first learning, and when she completed her lyrics she had him check them over

same for him, she would always read over his lyrics he written, and sometimes she recorded a guide for him !

they always bounce ideas off of each other whenever their stuck, and then their like “damn we rlly are big brain 🤞”

OHHHH SHE MET HIS CATS ONCE

she fell in love with them, and his cats were instantly drawn to her

jeno has like 100 pictures of her w his cats he’s like :)) my childern

after meeting them sooyoung wont stop asking for asking for pictures of them or asking if their okay 😭

jenos like “do you love my cats more than me?“ and shes like “YUP:D”

✿ haechan

oh my gosh someone seperate them

these two are so chaotic omg

they are always coming at everyone’s throats omg

they roast the shit out of everyone 😭😭

whenever they are together there’s always loud laughing, BECAUSE HAECHAN IS JUST SO FUNNY OK

completly random but they look so cute and pretty sitting next to each other :D

haechan does tease her, but it’s not as much as the other members and she’s like :) “i’m special”

he’s always hugging on her and she either has two reactions:

if she’s sleepy and haechan throws himself on her she’s like ??? who tf is on me ??? and she looks so confused while haechan is moving around on her to get comfy and hes lowkey screaming and shes like 😳 i just woke up, and then she just goes back to sleep

if she’s wide awake she will scream and laugh and jokingly push haechan off of her until she gives up and just hugs back onto him, and she pats his head and goes “haechannie, your so cute :) i love you!“

its kinda a suprise that he’s older than her because he acts SO CUTE AROUND HER

and normally sooyoung would judge tf iut of u if you acted cute around her but wirh haechan she gets SO SOFT

like internally screams with haechan looks at her with a soft expression on his face because HE IS JUST SO CUTE AWH

another gaming duo <3

although it’s harder to beat haechan for her 😭😭

she’s only beat him like 5 times of the 6 years she’s known him 🤞

they also stay up late together, like they’ll be facetiming and they will litwrally just talk about ANYTHING and laugh their asses off

he lets her ramble about the random facts that she knows or the show she has been watching and jes just like :D your so cute, even if she repeated the same thing 2828 times or is not making any sense at all

haechan and sooyoung are so soft for each other 🤞

but they also arent afraid to roast tf out of each other 💪

✿ jaemin

these two are the sweetest omg

like they are SO CLOSE

and they are always together omg

like they always hang out in either one of their rooms and chill, it’s mostly her room tho because she complains about jaemins bed 😳

jisung feels like jaemin is his roomie too because he’s in there so much :0

dw sooyoung and jaemin are considerate 🤞

if jisung is sleeping and they wanna have a deep ass talk then jaemin will drags her to his room, because lets say jeno is a heavy sleeper (idk if he is but lets just say he is ☺️)

they are ALWAYS cuddling, like whenever she walked infront of his and he is sitting down, he’ll pull her to either sit next to him or his lap, it depends if cameras are around 🤞 and then once she’s sitting he’ll wrap his arms around her and just cuddle until they get uncomfortable lmao 😭

sooyoung will not fall asleep on any other member but jaemin, it’s just a thing idk, not that she’s not comfortable with the other members she just prefers to cuddle w jaemin since they cuddle so much hehehehe

whenever they are out walking in the streets and she’s tired she’ll grab onto jaemin’s shirt and he just down at her like :0 oh my god your so cute i just wanna protect ☺️, and he just puts his arm around her shoulder while she holds onto him :( i love them their relationship is so soft

ohhhhh jaemin made her go bike riding w him one day and she felt like she was going to DIE, her legs were so sore afterwards but jaemin was semi fine, and she was just like 😡i hate you.

she always asks jaemin to edit her photos for her, cuz she doesn’t know how hmph, and jaemin offered to teach her so she was like ☺️ okay so she sat in a chair next to him, and she ended up falling asleep.... whoops

jaemin was like “so you just do this to remove any- sooyoung?” and he looked down and sooyoung had her head against her knees, and she was OUT, like jaemin tried everything to wake her, so he ended up having to pick her up and put her on his bed while he finished editing her pictures 🤞

best boy jaemin YUP

i could write for AGES about them because i just love their relationship so so so much but all you guys need to know in summary is that they are such a soft friendship, they can always be seen cuddling together, they talk about almost everything, and their just besties :D

✿ chenle

01 liner babe’s yup !

they were close before debuting because they were close in age, and when they found out they were debuting they were like YESSS I KNOW YOU 😟😟

they call themselves twins hehe, even if they aren’t even born in the same month 😭

if they say they are twins, they are twins.

HIGH PITCHED LAUGH DUO YUP

sooyoung also has a higher pitched laughed, so whenever they laugh, it’s VERY high pitched

also they love to randomly harmonize?

like they could just be sitting in the waiting room and then they would just sing in harmony and then go back to whatever they were doing :0

ohhhh and they LOVE doing tik toks together

they will do covers of dances together or those silly duo ones and it’s so FUNNY because they are both so chaotic and it’s so cute

they really killing everyone w their cuteness 😭😭😭

he was also so shocked when she spoke mandarin to him, even if it was just a little bit and kinda awkward because she had just been studying to for a few months (she started studying it in january 2021!) and he was like 😟😄😄

he also gave her a big hug but he was way more entergetic than renjun, he shook her back and forth and yelled in her ear, NOT ON OURPOSE

he was just excited 🤞🤞

ohhhh they also post lil duets together :D and it’s so CUTE

like their both bare faced in a dim lit vocal room and one of them is playing the piano, and they just sing, and it’s so raw and beautiful, OH MY GOD I LOVE THEM

vocal icons

✿ jisung

at first he was kinda shy around her, since hes normally shy around new people

and sooyoung was like, i understand, but shes an extrovert so she tried her hardest to be friends with everyone and talk to everyone, and jisung was like ???? how are you so talkative ???

the first thing he ever said to her was “your shirt’s cool, i like shinee subaenim too!” and it was really quiet and sooyoung was like “thanks ☺️”.

she was wearing a shinee tshirt btw, she’s a big shawol 🤭

they eventually got close though, i mean your bound to be when your with them all day yk

but sooyoung was so soft and gentle w him and reassuring him that it’s okay that hes a lil shy and he just felt comfortable around her, even if it was kinda hard to have conversations

now their inseparable!

she always laughs whenever he breaks something, but she always grabs it and sees if she can fix it for him, while laughing

for the first few years of their debut jisung was like her lil bro, she would always tease him or fool around him

and now its the reverse 😭

jisung always roast her or teases her, and it’s so subtle she would just laugh whenever he said something and then after awhile she realizes what he just said so she’s like ... ☺️😟😳😕

shes like wHAT HAPPENED TO MY LIL BRO

jisung always pats her head when she has her mouth open after he teases her, and is like “hehe, love u”

“sure you do jisung, sure you do.”

she gets him back by blasting twice or shinee and dancing on her bed until jisung gets out of bed and turns it off 😭

she never does that when he’s sleeping because she doesn’t actually wanna make him mad 😭

they have never fought and she’s not willing to loose that streak

jisung compared their hand size once and it litteraly made sooyoungs hands look like a baby hand and she was like ... i hate it here

now he always asks for a high five and then he laughs because of the size difference

and she gets SO MAD

“STOP DOING THATTTTT, ITS NOT FUNNY”

“stop falling for it 🤷‍♂️”

“hOLD ME BACK.”

jaemin actually had to hold her back from running after him after he teased her

not that she would hurt jisung....she would just hit him a few times

jaemin scolds her for fighting the members he’s like “we do not condone violence in this household!”

then she goes “condone violence my ass! just let me flick him.”

jaemin doesn’t let her flick him 😭😭

she does it before jisung goes to sleep tho 💪

[rosenallies]

Pssst

Maybe sleepy Nali not wanting to go to work tomorrow and being a baby about it and mommy Rosé trying to „motivate“ her gently? I just got signed into an early shift at the diner I work at and I REALLY don’t wanna 😩 this is very self indulgent haha

This is so cute ty bestie ! And ty for being patient, I know you sent this like hours and hours ago, I was just struggling inside my brain on how to start this shsbsb

—

“Nali, sweetheart, wake up,” Rosé cooed gently, swirling patterns on Denali’s shoulder to wake her up softly after she’d slept through two alarms.

She groaned and swatted Rosé’s hand away, her nose crinking grumpily. “Go away, ‘m sleeping.”

Rosé rolled her eyes lightheartedly, Denali’s sleeping patterns nothing but a mystery to her. There were days where Denali was up hours before her and sat in bed beside Rosé until she woke, and there were days like today where Denali acted like a cantankerous teenager and refused to be pulled from her slumber, even if she would be late for something.

“Baby, you’ve gotta get up, you have to be at work in an hour, don’t you?”

“Don’t care, I’m tired,” Denali grumbled, squirming away from Rosé.

“Angelface, don’t some of your students have competitions coming up? They need their coach, and you just got new skates. Don’t you wanna try them out?”

Denali groaned like she knew Rosé was right, but she still didn’t budge, making Rosé have to pull out a trick she always had up her sleeve.

Sliding one of her legs in between Denali’s, Rosé leaned over her, pressing kisses up the length of her neck.

“Come on, sweetheart, get up and mommy will make it so worth it if you get in the shower.”

Her breath hitched in her throat, fingers grappling at the duvet underneath her. “Mommy, I’m so sleepy,” she complained, a sweet pout on her pretty face.

Rosé stroked her cheek gently. “I know, honey, let me help you wake up in the shower, come on.”

Denali still only squirmed a bit, but made no effort to get up.

“Okay, fine,” Rosé said, retracting her touch and getting up from the bed, taking off her pajama top and tossing it toward Denali so she knew what was waiting for her, “suit yourself, but mommy’s gonna take a shower, it’s up to you if you’d like to join me.”

Begrudgingly, Denali got out of bed, the idea of Rosé pressing her full chest against Denali’s and waking her up underneath the warm shower spray pulling her from sleep all the way.

[taliaquinn]

Why Me!? Chapter 19

Authors Note:                                                                                            Hiya peeps and geeks, I finally published chapter 19. I hope you Peeps like it. Dont forget to reblog, comment and like!! (They make me happy)

“Think about it, why would she want to talk to you,” Chloe mumbled struggling to shake off the sleepiness “Right now she only sees you as the boy who refused to stand up for her, Against the girl that threatened her in the bathroom”. 

Adrien was silent at the other end of the phone. “She told you about Lila threatening her in the bathroom?” Nonono. That was the worst thing that could happen. Now rumors are going to spread.

Chloe could only scoff in response. She knew exactly what Adrien was worrying about.

“Pfft uh yeah, Mari told us everything, gotta say Adrien I wasn't that surprised when she told us, Kagami on the other hand….”

“SHE TOLD KAGAMI!?!?!?” Adrien shouted upset. Upset at Marinette for telling everyone, even Kagami. He’s noticed that Kagamis been blowing him off and sometimes even downright refusing to talk to him at social events they both attend. 

Marinette told Kagami and Chloe everything about Lila, Adrien, and Alya when she called them a week ago. Chloe's heart broke at hearing the girl sob. Kagami was enraged, in fact, that was what spurred her into starting to plot revenge. Karma would wreak havoc on everyone who dared hurt the bluenette

“Yes Adrien Kagami Knows and before you go off and get all flustered, No we haven't spread rumors or told anyone. At Marinette's insistence." She spat. Adrien didn't deserve to be protected. But poor Marinette still refused to take any drastic actions.

“Thank you, Chloe” The Model still had the nerve to thank her and ignore Marinette's kind act. She's had enough. Sitting up straighter in bed Chloe opened her laptop and started typing an email to Marinette.

“You know who else she’s been helping Adrikins?” she said in a honey-laced voice, sickeningly sweet. 

This familiar voice caused a sense of growing dread in Adrien's stomach. He wasn't talking to P. M Chloe aka “Post Marinette” Chloe anymore, he was talking to the old Chloe Bourgeois, and Plagg help him if he somehow pissed her off. Swallowing down the sense of dread he asked.

“Who?”

“Nino, you remember him right? The guy you claimed was your best friend? But then again you turned your back on him, that seems to be a trend with you these days”

Nino. Of course, he remembered about Nino. Nino called him tearfully seeking comfort from his best friend after his breakup with Alya. Adrien could only weakly offer some comfort. HEY! He was dealing with his own stuff. Ladybug stole Plagg from him. He wasn’t Chat Noir anymore. Also, he didn't want to get dragged into the conflict. Plus he thought that Nino was overreacting. Alya deserved a second chance. Right?

“W-we’re still best friends” he stuttered out. Nino has Marinette's number!? That's great he can get her number from him!!!!

“Hmmph yeah sure whatever helps you sleep at night.” Chloe had the right to speak her mind. She was tired and grumpy. A deadly combination. If she had eye bags in the morning because of him she was going to block the boy,

 “I'm beginning to think that you’re new bestie is Lila” she mentioned

“That's ridiculous, we're just friends”

Chloe scoffed. “Your standards for friends are ridiculously low. But whatever apparently sleazy Liars are your type”

Adrien was starting to get upset at all these sly remarks he was getting from Chloe. He called her for comfort. Who did she think she was? If he wanted sly comments he would have called Marinette, but he still didn't have her number. Wait a minute. She's been talking to Nino!!! He could just call Nino and get her Number from him!!! He didn't need Chloe! 

“Fine Chloe, you know what? turns out I don’t even need your help anymore,” He said smug, happy to have the upper hand. To be honest he half expected Chloe to beg him to not hang up on her.

“Why even bother calling me then?” that....was not the response he was expecting. Fine, it was probably all an act.

“I needed Marinette's number but then I realized that my bro Nino probably has it, so yeah I don’t need your help”

“But he b-” Ha now she was going to beg him not to hang upon him. Well, he wasn't going to give her the chance. 

“Goodbye Chloe” 

Hanging up he quickly tried to call Nino. After only receiving a dial tone, he shot him a few texts, expecting Nino to respond quickly. He always has.

After receiving none Adrien couldn’t help but be slightly annoyed. Nino probably forgot to charge his phone due to him still being sad over the breakup. This is why Adrien needs to convince Nino to get back together with Alya. He was a mess without her! His phone suddenly binged. Quickly checking, he was disappointed to see it was Chloe. Probably to try and get back on his good side. Ha.

Queen Bee: Nino told me to tell you that he is uh not in “The mood to deal with you and your b.s” tonight.

What!? No Chloe was obviously lying in some weird attempt at getting Payback. Adrien NEEDED to talk to Nino right now because Adrien was going to the states for some gala for the weekend! 

Adrikins: Chloe stop fooling around

Queen Bee: Trust me I'm not kidding around, I'm here trying to get some sleep and instead I'm serving as Nino's secretary apparently

Queen Bee: Leave him alone, if you had listened to me earlier you would have realized that Nino added your number to a nice Lil ol place known as the ~block list~

Adrikins: CHLOE YOU HAVE TO TALK TO HIM PLEASE DON'T LET HIM DO IT.

Queen Bee: hmmm let me think about it

At that Adrien let out a sigh of Relief, Chloe will talk some sense into Nino and everything will be back to normal between him and Nino. Even Marinette once he got her number from Nino!!

Queen Bee: I thought about it

Hope bloomed in Adrien's Chest, everything is finally going to be back to normal again!!

Queen Bee: N o

Queen Bee: You’re getting muted for the rest of the night, consider that payback for waking me up so early, I have a trip this weekend. I need all my beauty sleep, you should consider learning about it

Wait a minute if she is going where Adrien thinks she is then there's hope for him after all!!!

Queen Bee: Toodles~

Adrikins: Wait a minute where are you going this weekend

Queen Bee: None of your business

Wayne Manor                                                                                        Gotham, USA                                                                                                8:00 a.m

“Marinette, I’m just happy you managed to leave that toxic situation before it got worse,” Dick said as he engulfed Marinette in a hug, although not as strong since his ribs were still in pain. Dick slightly grimaced in anticipation of the humongous lecture he was going to get from Bruce later.

“Trust him, Mari, here in Gotham I always see..” Jason trailed off at Dicks pointed look “I mean WE always see....uh in the news how those situations escalate quickly," Yowch talk about a blunder. He still needed to get used to having a sibling who wasnt involved in the nightly adventures. "only not everyone is lucky enough to have Batman swoop in and save the day” Jason quickly added. He threw a prayer of thanks that his adorable baby sister was now safe in Gotham, well as safe as Gotham gets anyways.

Dick racked his brain looking for something to cheer up his little sister in his arms. For once his big brother instincts were being slightly overwhelmed. All of his siblings have gone through awful stuff. This isn't the first, and he doubts it's going to be the last time that he's been there to comfort one of his siblings, or friends for god's sake.  

“Wait!!! Dick, doesn't Bruce have that trip in a few days?” Jason piped up.

Oh, Crap. Dick almost forgot about that. Oh god, he couldn’t possibly subject Mari to that disaster….on the other hand it WOULD be a good distraction for her. Hmmm. 

“Fine, Mari, pack your bags, You’re not even going to school yet so you won't miss anything,” Dick announced.

“Pack my bags?” Marinette couldn't help but get a bad feeling at the sight of Dicks smirk.

“Yeah no, you’re right. Don't pack your bags make your dad pay for new clothes.” Jason teased. It's what he always did. Billionaire Brucie wouldn't even gawk at the price of a new pair of jeans. Heck, He was paying for his New Truck!!! 

“Wait where are we even going?” She asked slightly disturbed at the sight of Dicks growing grin.

“New York City”

Authors Message:                                                                                        I hope you guys enjoyed todays chaoter. Next chapter some new characters are going to enter the fray. Can you take a guess as to who they may be ;)                                                                                           Also Happy Belated Birthday to Our Beloved Timothy Jackson Drake  Fun fact I was listening to Hamilton was writing this chapter and its given me the idea to possibly create a Hamilton AU involving the Batfam and slight Adrinette, What do you guys think?

Taglist:

@purplesundaze @silvergold-swirl @k-poplunardreams @pepelachanel @laurcad123 @maribat-is-lifeblood @kass-is-weird @another-fan-of-anotherplan @damianette-is-life @amayakans @parallelparabox @miukiiu @valeks-princess @toodaloo-kangaroo @vixen-uchiha @thezestywalru @dreamykitty25 @pirats-pizzacanninibles @mochinek0 @shamefullove @mochegato @souleateralicestein @thestressmademedoit @throneoffirebreathingbitchqueen @aestheticnpoetic @mysupporthyperfixations @itsmeevie01

[deniigi]

MORE POLYCULE SHIT

here this is mostly Sam/Ned from Matt’s POV. (this piece assumes Matt didn’t know about the negotiations until later)

Title: soda bottles

Summary: Matt finds out about Sam’s involvement with Ned and then with Peter’s polycule. He tries to talk to Sam about it, but fails. On like, every front.

---------------

The apprentice told him to stay out of his room and his life and his business and he should have known better by now, truly.

Matt knew that voice. And he also knew that what Sam, Samuel, Sammy-my-darling was doing right now at this present moment was giggling.

Unacceptable. There would be no joy in this house.

Matt removed himself from the door and declared war in silence.

 ---

 The dogs were instrumental in luring Samuel out to open space. And by luring, Matt meant knocking on his bedroom door with leashes in hand and asking Sam if he wanted a walk.

In no time Matt had zero leashes and zero dogs and, while he was at it, zero apprentices.

In fact, he had been abandoned.

In his own house.

Again.

How did this keep happening?

 ---

 Foggy told Matt to let Sam have his little crush on Ned. Ned was a good boy. Foggy had maintained this for years. He skirted around the fact that he’d grabbed Ned’s shoulders when he was 17 and had told him to stare him in the eyes and to never fall in love with his best friend.

Matt pointed this out to him and got a pillow to the face, then a huff and an uncalled-for reminder that he was a fucking idiot and no one loved him.

This was Foggy’s love language though, so Matt didn’t take it to heart. Instead, he abandoned him for the only person in the world who truly understood him.

Jenn.

 ---

  Jenn had to spend fifteen minutes cooing over the fact that Matt had acquired an apprentice and then she had to spend another ten being an asshole about it and then she spent a solid 5 making dad jokes at him when he tried to talk and so he waited until she was done with her cackling and personal jabs.

She told him that it was cute that Peter’s bestie was gushing over Matt’s apprentice.

She told him that he should be happy for them.

And Matt was. Happy for them, that is.

He was thrilled.

Sam’s track record with long-term partners, as far as Matt could tell, was a solid nil for nil. The boy refused to be attached to anyone, which Matt totally got.

But it was like standing by, watching your own young moronic self making a series of unfortunate decisions that were not only whole unnecessary, but also had solutions within easy reach, like headstones in a damn cemetery.

Sam had a string of guys and girls that he’d picked up at clubs and bars and fuckin’ hipster literature readings downtown who were literally, actually falling over themselves to be with him. And he texted them and laughed about them and joked with Leilani and Achara about them, and then never spoke of them ever again.

Matt got it, okay?

He’d been that guy.

Maybe a little more on the jock side of things and maybe a little less, say, refined than Sammy—but he still got it. A slightly longer relationship was good for Sam. And Ned was a good egg—no, a great egg.

But he just couldn’t shake this feeling, Jenn.

He didn’t even know what it was, but it made him paranoid and want Sam to go back to the self-destructive nonsense, because at least Matt knew what that felt like. He could push back against that after dumping the kid out of the ring in training.

“Matty,” Jenn said affectionately, “You’re trying to protect Sam, Ned, and Peter. But you don’t have to do that. They’re all grown. Let them make their decisions.”

Ooooohohoho

How dare she.

Matt knew they were grown. Sam was nearly 25. Peter was almost 27—oh god, Peter was almost 27. FUCK. Jesus. Lord. Someone—Christ.

Sammy was a baby.

He couldn’t be playing with these big kids, he’d have his heart broken.

What if Ned got bored of him, Jenn??

Matt couldn’t beat the shit out of Ned. Ned was a good boy. And Peter would lose his damn gourd and that was how Matt would end up under two tons of concrete and rebar with an angry spider perched on top, stomping and spitting.

“Matt,” Jenn said soothingly. “Peter learned how to be polyamorous from you, dear heart.”

Oh shit.

Oh right.

Oh no.

“I’ve gotta go,” Matt said. “Lovely talking to you, next time you’re in town, come around for a foursome or a twosome or a three if Kirsten’s down—okay BYE.”

Jenn laughed at him when he hung up.

Matt clutched at his chest.

 ---

 He’d inadvertently taught Peter what polyamory looked like by flinging himself down on many disgusting surfaces and moaning and writhing in agony and despair about Foggy being monogamous and everyone in the world being unspeakably brilliant and strong and no-doubt gorgeous.

Fuckin’ Kirsten.

Fuckin’ Wade.

Fuckin’ Karen.

And Heather and Marci and ONE TIME ONLY Frank.

UGH.

Disgusting. Matt needed Lysol to scrub that moment of weakness from his brain.

The point was that he’d been a chump, and baby Peter had observed these various moaning sessions and had apparently, at some point, started taking notes.

Gah.

Peter. Why?

Stop loving your friends. Stop copying me. Get your own breakdown material.

Uuuuuuugh.

Okay, okay. Rally, Murdock. It’s fine.

This is simply a conversation to have with Sammy about how to negotiate such--hng. Actually maybe this was a Kirsten conversation.

 ---

 He went to visit Kirsten.

He got a little distracted because Kirsten was Kirsten and she required thorough smelling and like, minimum two kisses and she deserved to have at his bare chest if she wanted it—who was he to deny her—THE POINT.

The point. Was.

That he told Kirsten about things and she told him not to talk about work when she was taking her shirt off, and he told her to leave it on for just like, five minutes longer and that came out wrong and she was insulted and Matt had to backtrack for half an hour.

But he got there in the end, alright?

Kirsten said she didn’t know that Sam was polyamorous.

Matt said that he didn’t know if he was, but he sure as shit was flirting with Ned like, constantly.

Kirsten said that that explained why Sam kept telling her that he couldn’t come to dinner with them because he already had a date. Kirsten then went rigid and said, “Wait, you mean Ned-Ned?”

Yes.

Yes, Matt did.

“Oh.”

Correct reaction.

“Is that—do you think that’s –hm.”

Correct reaction maintained and appreciated. Matt no longer felt like a monumental ass.

“That might be a little, uh, cuttin’ it close there,” Kirsten said. “Does Peter know?”

Presumably. Ned couldn’t lie for shit.

“Maybe we should ask Peter what the negotiations there are. He’s pretty on top of that stuff.”

Shockingly, that was true.

Good plan.

“If Sammy’s gonna get involved with them, then he should at least know what he’s getting into,” Kirsten said.

Yes, but also—why is this feeling happening, Kirsten, beloved life partner number 2?

“Oh, that? That’s called ‘you’re a territorial dick,’” Kirsten said. “Get over yourself.”

“But he’s 24,” Matt said. “A child.”

“He’ll be twenty-five in a few months, Matthew,” Kirsten said. “That’s bad-decision-making prime-time. This is inevitable. My concern is that he’s not going into a relationship with Ned, thinking that he’s the primary partner there.”

Okay, fair.

“Are we done with this conversation now?”

Yes.

“Thank god. I hate your dad impulses. Cleanse yourself of them and get on the bed.”

Would do.

 ---

 Kirsten made Matt call Peter and be awkward for the both of them which, Matt would like it stated for the record, was extremely unfair and manipulative of her.

Peter told him that Sam was fine.

Peter told him that he and Sam had maybe fooled around a little bit without Matt and Foggy and Kirsten’s knowledge which was. Hm.

Troublemakers. Stop laughing, Franklin. This is nothing like the time we inducted Kirsten into our life and lied about it to everyone we knew for 3 years.

Nothing.

Peter thought not. Peter thought that Sam had told Matt about this whole thing. He then got a little huffy and said that Ned was the one who had swept Sam off his feet while Peter had been standing right there, man. As Spiderman. Primed for feet-sweeping.

That was satisfying.

Peter took the next ten minutes to complain about how Sam didn’t want to talk to him as much as he wanted to talk to Ned and how Ned was always begging off dinners with Peter and MJ to go have dinner with Sam and how Peter and MJ had to make do with Johnny in his absence.

Matt would never understand why Peter pretended that he and Johnny Storm were nothing more than fuck buddies, but okay, sure. If that’s what helps you sleep at night, little lion man.

Peter went on to say that the worst part of Sam and Ned’s mutual obsession was how fucking cute it was.

Disgusting, Peter maintained.

There were matching bracelets and drawn out decisions about matching sneakers. And there was nattering on until past midnight about Transformers lore and there was non-stop texting and complaints about various tools and coding languages and all this shit that Peter’s own flavor of nerd had diverged from about six years ago.

Kirsten made a little squeak that told Matt that she was highly entertained by Peter’s ‘complaints.’

It sounded more to Matt like Peter and MJ were hunkered down behind the couch, narrating all Ned’s behavior to Johnny (the totally uninvolved fuckbuddy) in whispers.  

Foggy curled up on the edge of their own couch to muffle his wheezy giggles.

Exhausting.

The youth were exhausting. How had no one just shot Matt straight through the heart at 27?

“I will speak to Sam about emotional repression,” he promised Peter only to receive a “NO WAIT” from both him and, from the sound of it, MJ and (only fuckbuddy) Johnny a little ways away.

Peter hurriedly explained that Sammy was really shy and skittish about being around their polycule and had just connected with Ned as the least threatening member and it had taken ages, so please don’t say anything and destroy all of the rest of their hard work.

This hit a strange note.

Foggy and Kirsten weren’t snickering anymore either.

Sam?

Wasn’t?

Shy?

Like, if anything, Sammy was shameless. Always lying in people’s laps and snatching their open hands to swing back and forth.

Sure, he was teasing. But shy? Shy?

Sam was sick.

“No,” Peter said. “Double D, he’s not sick.”

Very sick. Terminally ill.

“DD. He’s not sick.”

Bullshit. Matt was taking him to the doctor. Too bad, Sam. You couldn’t avoid it forever.

“Matt. He’s just. Emotionally. Repressed. You should recognize it because its your whole way of being.”

Wow, hadn’t this conversation been going on for a while now? Time to go.

“MATT. Leave him alone,” Peter said. “I’m looking after him, okay? Chill.”

Chill. Yes. Okay, fine. Matt would chill.

For now. Goodbye, Peter.

 ---

 Matt hadn’t chilled about anything in his life and he didn’t intend to start now. So instead he confronted the apprentice.

The apprentice leaned very hard against his door and told Matt that he would rather die than speak of such things, so Matt told him to bare his neck.

Sammy was convinced. But only just.

He made himself frighteningly small and grumpy on his bed and allowed Matt to sit only on the last four inches of it. Matt kind of wanted to take the opportunity to teach him how to hiss.

But alas. That was a skill for another time.

“I talked to Peter,” he said.

Sam mumbled.

“He says you’re shy. Are you feeling okay?”

Sam mumbled in a more prolonged, growly kind of way. He was muffled by something. Probably jeans. Or sweats. Hard to tell.

“Why are you being shy? We both know you’re not shy. Ned’s a nice boy,” Matt told him. “You can trust him.”

Sam jerked his body in some way strongly enough to make the bed shake.

Matt sighed.

“Sam,” he said.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Sam said.

“Listen, kid,” Matt said. “You’re gonna do what you want. You’re grown, those are your decisions to make. But if you’re ever uncomfortable or you want to spend time with one person in particular, you’ve gotta communicate that to the others. I know that’s not like, smoothly done or whatever. But it’s what you’ve gotta do in these kinds of relationships.”

Sam made an unhappy sound.

“I don’t want a relationship,” he said quietly.

Ehn.

Same, pal.

They’re a lot of work.

“They’re worth it,” Matt promised him. “And it’s okay to be a little in love, you know. I’m in love every day. It’s not shameful. You don’t have to hide it.”

Sam huffed.

“People’ll stare,” he finally said. “If we ever went out. People would stare.”

Ahhh.

“That’s what you think,” Matt said. “But then you go and do it and it turns out that no one actually cares. People are very self-centered, Sam. You spend all this time worrying about how others perceive you and, at the end of the day, 90% of people literally don’t care. You don’t have to talk to Ned in your room all the time.”

Sam did something with his body that concentrated it even further into a dense mass.

“I like him,” he admitted. “He’s nice.”

Matt hummed.

“He’s a peaceful person,” he said.

“He talks so I don’t have to,” Sam said.

Aw.

Matt felt across the bed and eventually found Sam’s cheek to pinch.

“So shy for such a loudmouth,” he teased.

Sam bit his hand. Matt snickered.

“It’s okay, when I met Fogs I was shy, too,” he said.

Sam grumbled.

“It’s true,” Matt said. “Could not fathom having another human around who I didn’t have to put on an act for.”

He waited.

Sam didn’t even seem to realize that his heart was slowing down.

“I don’t like talking all the time,” he said after a long few beats.

Matt ruffled his hair.

“Ned knows a lot about Star Wars,” he said.

“And computers,” Sam added.

“And code,” Matt said.

Sam’s foot shook a little. Matt schooled his face. Sam crunched into a tighter ball.

Adorable.

Matt got up.

“Long distance is rough,” he said. “Maybe you guys can watch a movie together.”

Sam made a disgruntled sound. Matt left him to be miserable.

 ---

 “You’ve sure turned your opinion around.”

Yes, Husband. Matt had indeed. But that was because Sam was clearly and obviously suffering as a result of this crush, which was precisely where Matt needed him to be.

Misery was familiar. Resentment was nearly as good as spite in terms of skill development.

Dopey-ness was asking for trouble.

“Matt, you cannot be serious.”

Oh, but he could.

“Matthew, what did you tell that boy?”

Nothing he didn’t need to know.

Foggy abandoned him at the table. Matt sipped his coffee. It tasted oh-so-sweet.

 ---

 Things did not change until Matt got a text from Peter that said simply ‘when the fuck is Sam’s birthday?’

In February. Why was he asking?

Peter said ‘damn. Okay, thanks.’

Peter then said that he’d seemed a little sad lately and Ned was freaking out about it and fixating, so they were collectively looking for an excuse to cheer Sam up a little.

Oh, Matt realized. No, that wasn’t sad.

The night nurse had given Sammy the good drugs after last week. He was high as a kite, bless him. Kept running into walls and shit. Matt had dragged him up out of the dog beds twice now.

He informed Peter of the damaged elbow and got nothing but keyboard smashes in return.

This was followed by Sam stumbling out of his room and half up the stairs to make pitiful sounds when he couldn’t make them stay still long enough to climb the rest of them. Foggy shook his head and told Matt to go “strap that kid to the bed, for god’s sake. He’s gonna tear more stitches. And go text for him before he drops his phone again.”

Sammy was coming along great.

He held his phone out to Matt when Matt came down to stand over him on the stairs.

“They’re yellin’,” he slurred.

Yeah, Matt figured.

“Bed,” he said.

“It’s too hot,” Sam said.

No, pathetic ball of humanity. That was the fever, bud.

“Open the window,” Matt said.

“I have a window?”

Bless.

“Up you go,” Matt said.

“DON’T TOUCH ME. Nooooo. Teach, noooooo.”

 ---

 MM: Peter stop texting him. he can’t read his texts rn. Zero tolerance for opioids.

PP: for WHAT

MM: he’s fine. lightly stabbed. Fractured elbow.

MJ: MATT

MM: yes?

MJ: tell him to get better for us

NL: ;__; please?

MM: he will be fine. He’s supposed to be sleeping this off.  

MJ: can you keep us updated?

MM: why

PP: he’s our partner?

MM: ?

MM: I thought he was Ned’s main

NL: AJDF:AKSDFJASDFa

NL: DOES HE TALK ABOUT ME??

MJ: dude

NL: my b my b sry sry

NL: does he talk about me DD?

MM: no

NL: cool cool cool that’s fine

PP: ned

NL: it’s casual that’s cool

MJ: oh my god

NL: it doesn’t mean anything. That makes sense.

MM: peter what is happening?

PP: ned has decided that no texting means that sam hates him and no longer wants to be part of our relationship

NL: TELL HIM IM SORRY

PP: remember how you told me I have rejection issues?

MM: Ned he’s fine. He’s not mad. He’s high.

NL: [pikawat.png]

MJ: *coughs*

NL: oh shit my bad. I mean.

NL: what do you mean?

MM: I mean he likes you. He just hates talking about weaknesses. Ergo he hates talking about you.

MJ: ah, yes. I see now. The superhero logic. The forest has reappeared before me.

NL: OWO

MM: what does this mean?

PP: it’s a face. Like a super interested cat

NL: shut up

NL: so he likes me back?

MJ: no

PP: no

MM: I presume so? I don’t know kid. I just said he doesn’t talk about it.

NL: DD I will pay you in computer repairs to find out for me

MM: to find out if Sam likes you??

NL: yes

MM: what part of his obsession is confusing you

MJ: ASHDAF:SDF

PP: harsh

NL: all of it.

NL: okay so here’s the thing. We got like, matchy matchy stuff, right? Cause that’s what couples do. But he never wears his?? And like, we’ve been playing these games online, like, trying to beat each other, but he just stops playing halfway through? And if we’re watching a movie, it’s fine for the first half, but then he gets quiet and I just end up nattering away about nothing for like an hour and I can’t read the silence DD. I can’t read it. And Peter’s a liar

PP: okay no it is WELL established that I can’t lie what are you even talking about

NL: and he keeps going on about how sam’s shy, but he’s NOT shy. And we were fine until this week, but like, obviously, he’s high and not reading his messages and stuff, but idk am I making this into a big deal? From your end?

MM: What was that face, Peter?

PP: OwO

MM: OwO

MJ: ASDFAeirwieawewdflajwe

MJ: NED LOOK WHAT YOU’VE DONE TO THE OLD MAN

NL: SHUT UP. DD, please. Help me. Should I apologize? Is he bored of me? Does he want more time with Peter?

PP: what

PP: no pal I’m just a piece of ass in this situ

MJ: as you should be

PP: awwww

MM: ned Sammy’s fine?

NL:  omg ‘sammy’ that’s really cute do you think he’d mind if I called him that? You know. If he ever speaks to me again?

PP: DD just tell him everything is fine so we can all go to sleep without being woken up every 20 min for a crisis.

MM: I literally don’t know. He doesn’t talk about any of you.

NL: can you sneaky-ninja ask him?

  Matt could not with these children. Sam’s heartbeat was evening out. He was nearly back to sleep. Matt’s back couldn’t take hauling him up off the stairs in another half an hour, so he was going to stay right where he was, that was for damn sure.

“Samuel, you are dating three different flavors of spazz,” he told him.

Sam wriggled over and snuffled into his duvet.

Matt decided that that was an affirmative.

  MM: he says you’re all dramatic and to leave him alone to sleep.

NL: ;__;

PP: ned that is not rejection

NL: ok

MJ: this is embarrassing

NL: I’m just gonna crawl under the floorboards and waste away👍

PP: for fuck’s sake this is me-levels of drama

NL: DD can you tell him that if he’s ever down to just watch shit as friends that’s okay too?

MJ: NED. Matt’s literally out of this loop. And Sam’s probably unconscious.

MM: can confirm is now unconscious. I am exiting your drama.

PP: Dude remember when I said I was gonna drown myself in the sea? You are reaching those levels

NL: I JUST LOVE HIM

  Oh, aw.

  NL: And it’s okay if he doesn’t feel the same way, that’s okay, I just wanted to make sure he wasn’t like uncomfortable. I can text him less and let him do his work things and we don’t have to organize shit on the weekends. It’s totally fine

  These fuckin’ kids.

Matt grabbed Sam before he cracked his head against the wall and felt around for something to put between his forehead and it.

He fumbled out his phone in the meantime.

“Samuel,” he said into it, “When you wake up, come upstairs before taking the next pill.”

 ---

 Sam was in pain and grumpy as shit and his mood did not improve as he read through Matt’s messages.

“Two days and everyone loses their goddamn minds,” he said.

Pretty much.

“Ned loves you,” Matt teased.

“Ned needs one of those happy pills,” Sam deadpanned.

Hm. How about no?

Sam groaned and carefully melded himself to the table.

“Why don’t you wear the matchy-matchy stuff?” Matt asked, setting a bag of icy water on Sam’s shoulders. He made a soft sound of relief.

“I don’t want to get ‘em dirty,” Sam hummed.

Hm.

“Maybe if you wore them out a little bit, Ned would like that,” Matt offered.

Sam mulled this over.

“Nah,” he said. “I’ll just tell him I wear it to sleep.”

Matt was so proud.

He missed Foggy coming in halfway through that discussion.

He did not miss the lecture Foggy laid on both of them about lying to loved ones.

 ---

 Matt decided that Sam was far, far more emotionally repressed than he’d given the kid credit for. He was tickled pink.

Kirsten and Foggy were not. They called this ‘concerning behavior’ that needed ‘to be monitored in case of hidden injuries and self-harm.’

And like, man, it was as if they’d hard experience with this shit or something.

Matt decided to bypass their waffling and cornered Sam by trapping him in his duvet and demanding to know if he was hiding any injuries or self-harm.

Sam told him to get out of his room. His heartbeat did not react to the accusations, but rather to Matt’s ‘giant, heavy, albatross body’ assaulting him in his safe place.

Matt decided that this was proof that the emotional repression was, as he had always argued, doing exactly what it needed to: making Sam three times more functional as a human being.

Foggy took from that explanation that Matt was lying to him again.

Which, like, obviously.

But did Foggy need to know any of that?

Fuck no.

Only happy times with Matt Murdock here.

Smiling was somehow the wrong answer.

Smiling resulted in yelling. And then lots of loud heartbeats. And then something that looked a little like a fight, probably, to people with working eyes. But Matt knew that it wasn’t that.

It was just Foggy being hurt that Matt couldn’t tell him that Foggy’s homesickness was digging holes in his own resolve and mental wellbeing.

Sam popped up when Foggy went to go lay down to calm down and asked if everything was okay.

Matt told him it was.

Sam’s heart was not convinced. It started beating faster somehow.

Matt fully anticipated the texts that arrived later that night.

 ---

 PP: yo DD, you guys okay?

MM: why

PP: ‘cause Sam’s freaking out saying that you and Foggy were shouting again?

MM: ah

MM: no we’re okay. No biggie

PP: I smell bullshit

MM: carry on smelling then

PP: Matt do you ever think about how you’re like, an example to us all of how not to live?

MM: beg your pardon?

PP: I just mean like, you do shit and we all learn from your shit. Like, every day.

MM: ?

PP: Sam like dumped a pile of lies he’d been telling Ned in his lap and started crying for like half an hour and apologized for another 40 minutes and then hung up and won’t answer his phone.

MM: what was that face again? The cat one?

PP: OwO

MM: OwO

PP: lol

 ---

 The apprentice was perhaps absorbing too much too fast. He flat out denied having had any emotional crisis.

His heart was dead even when he said it. He was getting too good at out-maneuvering that trick.

“Peter seems to think that you had one the other night,” Matt mused.

“Peter needs to mind his own business,” Sam sniffed.

Aha.

“You like Peter,” Matt pointed out.

“He’s fine,” Sam said.

“Fine or fine?”

“That’s nasty, Teach. Don’t be gross. That’s like your little brother.”

Oh, sure it was.

“If Peter is sussing out your lies, you’re not doing a good enough job,” Matt said. “What you need, kiddo, is an aura and a starting point.”

Sam paused in making a horrible grating noise with some tool in his hand.

“A starting point?” he asked.

Why yes, apprentice.

As in, if you start off with your walls up and don’t let them buckle so easily, so many of these problems can be avoided.

“Isn’t that, like, the opposite of what Foggy said to do?” Sam asked suspiciously.

Well, technically. The husband might be correct for normal humans, but they weren’t normal humans. And as much as Matt loved him and thought he was brilliant, Foggy would never truly grasp that Matt needed those lies.

He needed the repression. The bottling. The anger.

He needed all that shit to be shaken up in him and then capped by the helmet every night.

Doing that kept Matt safe. It kept others safe.

It wasn’t fun and it wasn’t pretty and yeah, Matt was pretty fucked up because of it.

But Stick hadn’t been wrong about everything.

Not even he could be wrong about everything.

“It’s called balance,” Matt said. “Think about it like this. You’re a teacher. You’re about to walk into a new class. You need to establish a respectful relationship between yourself and these kids. How do you do it? Do you start off nice? Or do you start off strict?”

Sam said nothing.

“I start off strict,” Matt said. “Because it’s infinitely easier to become nicer and to keep respect than it is to start off nice and get meaner.”  

Sam processed this.

“This sounds like an anti-Foggy sentiment,” he said.

No. It wasn’t anti-Foggy. Nothing was anti-Foggy.

“It’s nuance,” Matt said. “Intrapersonal relationships? Minimal repression. Interpersonal relationships, maximum repression. Don’t give them something to use against you”

Sam’s teeth clicked together as he worked his jaw.

“Talk to Ned and Peter,” he said. “Walls up to everyone else.”

Everyone else. Yes.

“I can do that.”

Yeah, Matt knew. Sam did it to pretty much anyone he didn’t immediately take a liking to at the firm.

“I can do that,” Sam repeated.

Woah. Wait. Hold on there, slugger. Nuance, remember?

“I’m just gonna hate the entire world,” Sam said. “Thanks, Teach. That’s a big help.”

 ---

 PP: Matt

MM: Peter

PP: you know that Sam fucks with you daily right?

MM: …I forget sometimes

PP: lol you guys are funny

  That little shit. Fine.

Do whatever. See if Matt cared.

Goddamn kids and their goddamn love affairs.

Whatever. Fuck ‘em.

Let them learn the bullshit on their own time. Matt had better things to do.

 ---------------

Matt and Foggy and Kirsten have their own polycule goin on with folks entering and leaving it as need be. And sometimes you just have to make Sam/Ned content because it is unerringly adorable.

[puckngrind]

What’s In a Name: 5 - J. Toews

Chapter 5

Where we left off: Jon and the Blackhawks won the 2015 Stanley Cup and he elects to celebrate with Bekah at home vs. going out on the town.

Warnings: smut, language

Word Count: 3,405  (felt way longer when I wrote it)

Series Masterlist ) Puck ‘n Grind’s masterlist

Titles.

It’s hard to title something when you just don’t know what to call it or admit to it honestly. Bekah loved watching Jon and his team regain the title of champions. It gave him this energy as they enjoyed the time they spent together. Bekah was nervous when Jon told her his family was going to come over. They decided having dinner in was better than out since the entire city was electrified after the win. With that his family came over for dinner the night after the win but everyone kept the conversation more to the week’s plans of celebrating and not Jon and Bekah’s connection. Bekah wondered if Jon asked them not to discuss it or was it just not an issue for them? She observed the Toews family more than anything.

A phone call changed all that was planned when Bekah had to leave before the city celebrations for the cup. Jon knew he couldn’t beg her to stay when her boss called needing her back early and gave her the vacation days back times two. Bekah promised to use them all on him as she kissed him hard before heading into Midway and back to Ohio. Her presence was missed as he hoisted the cup for the thousands of fans who lined the streets and packed into Soldier Field. With so many eyes on him he really only wanted hers right there next to him. Then just like that he was back home in Winnipeg and their text and phone conversations continued like normal.

By the end of the summer, Jon and Bekah were laying in bed in his Chicago home when they decided just not to label it. The months between her leaving after the cup and his training camp starting they found a few times to see each other. He made a couple trips to Columbus on the way to or from vacations and work requirements. Bekah found herself on a plane a few times for a weekend in Chicago when he was there. He mentioned his days with the cup but then dropped it after she started talking about a major project. He also wondered if the spotlight of his career was part of it. He never spoke the words to her but it was almost constantly in the back of his mind. They enjoyed the time together but their lives didn’t quite mesh once the season started and they both knew it.

What the two couldn’t deny was that the sex was amazing and the friendship they built was different than any relationship they had with anyone else. Bekah was a complete open book with Jon. He knew the completely unfiltered Bekah even more than her own family or even Brynn. Jon confided in her in ways even he was shocked by sometimes. She wasn’t caught up in the fame of his world and venting about all of it seemed easier with her. Yet, at the end of the day, being in a defined relationship just wasn’t realistic so they decided friendship was perfectly fine.

Finding time throughout the season was rough. It added to the fact that a friendship would be the only thing that would work. Bekah had a big project for Christmas and Jon had the flu during All-star break. The timing just didn’t work and the tension was felt by both once the end of the season rolled in.

Jon: are you coming to the game tonight?

The Blue Jackets were playing the Blackhawks and Bekah was already at Brynn’s waiting for her to go.

Bekah: Maybe...

Jon: are you wearing your CBJ sweater or mine?

Bekah: I said maybe, Tae.

Jon: I know you are coming. I just need to know if I need to look for that stupid thirds sweater or the far superior one you own.

Bekah pulls her lip into her teeth to contain the smile.

Jon: that’s mine. I think you know what I’m hoping to see 😉

“That’s Jon isn’t it?” Brynn emerged from her bedroom with her self-deemed lucky Blue Jackets sweatshirt on. “Are you telling him you are betraying our friendship and wearing that?” Brynn’s face contorts looking at her best friend in a Blackhawks jersey curled up on her couch.

“Rin!” Bekah huffs out.

“What? Our team....excuse me, my team needs as much cheering as possible. It’s been a rough season and today is our last game and Chicago already made the playoffs,” she gives her bestie a sly smile, “but I get it.” Brynn flutters around her home before finally getting in Bekah’s car.

Bekah’s phone buzzes as her and Brynn enter Nationwide Arena.

Jon: I’m skating during warmups but I’m a healthy scratch. Just don’t want you to worry.

Bekah cusses and Brynn looks over and mouths what?

“Well, maybe I should have worn something else?” Bekah flashes the text to Brynn as they walk.

“Greeeeaaattt. They are resting him because this game doesn’t matter. He will be in the press box then.” Brynn points up as they stand at the top of their section.

Warmups start and Bekah crosses her legs tight when Jon’s eyes meet hers. It had been months since the two saw each other in person and while she thought the desire to be under him was gone, by the look on both of their faces you could tell that just wasn’t true.

“You two are eye fucking each other with an audience.” Brynn whispers into Bekah’s ear.

“What? No. Rin. We are friends.” Bekah feels the flush coming to her cheeks.

“Friendship my ass...” Brynn says under her breath as the teams skate off.

Jon: I can see you, Beks

Bekah: what? When you were on the ice?

Jon: Now. I might be in the rafters but you are in a sea of blue with my jersey on. Still looks smokin’ hot on you.

Jon: from every angle 😉

Jon sends a picture of Bekah and Brynn from his seat. Bekah turns around and looks up. She can see the top of his head leaning out the box.

Bekah: I see you too.

Jon: Can I see you tonight please?

Bekah: I guess.

Jon: I’ll meet you in the lobby after the game.

“I’m guessing I’m riding home with Derek?” Brynn leans into Bekah at the end of the game.

“Yeah.” Bekah feels the warmth return to her cheeks.

The game ended and Bekah found herself standing in the Blackhawks team hotel’s lobby waiting for Jon. Pacing and attempting to take in the surroundings. She was glad she had a decent t-shirt on under her jersey because looking like a fan girl waiting for the team was not a look she was going for. Especially after how long it had been since she was face to face with Jon without plexiglass between them.

“Hey Beks.” Jon’s voice whispers from behind her. She jumps and turns.

“Tae! Long time, no see.” She goes to hug him and he catches her lips in his with his hands on her face. Releasing her face he slides one of his hands into hers and leads Bekah up to his room.

Jon pinned her to the door as he locked it in place. “Sorry I didn’t play tonight.” Jon sucks on the spot behind Bekah’s ear.

“Sorry your team didn’t win.” Bekah laughs as she runs her hands up the inside of his suit coat. Pulling at his shirt.

“Well it looked like your team lost from your outfit choice. Speaking of, where is it?” Jon pulls his finger along the collar of Bekah’s shirt.

“In my car. Didn’t want to seem like a fan girl waiting for you in the lobby or...what do they call the girls who just want to sleep with the players?”

“Bunnies. And damnit Beks, you are not any of those things that’s for sure.” Jon lifts Bekah up by her thighs and she whimpers.

“It’s been awhile Jon...” Bekah whispers in his ear her voice unsteady.

“I know. I’ve missed you and this.” He doesn’t let up pressing her against the door.

“I mean you are the last man I’ve slept with.” Bekah admits biting at her lip. Jon leans back to look her in the eyes. Her hazel green eyes looking for something.

“You think you aren’t the last woman I’ve been with?” Jon kisses her lips then pulls back making sure she’s hearing the words he’s saying. “Beks. I’ve only slept with you since the All-Star game in 15.”

“Seriously? But we aren’t...” Jon kisses her lips in desperation.

“Beks. Yes.” He kisses her again and she moans in his mouth. “Can we please get undressed? I’ve been fantasizing about this moment for way too long.” Jon carries Bekah to the bed and undresses her slowly. Taking time to praise her body and kiss every inch of exposed skin. Bekah does the same as he hovers above her. Loving the way that Jon’s muscles tighten under her touch. The connection between them is undeniable. Words no longer needed to find the perfect spot. The night is long and slow taking their time and enjoying each climax together.

“When does your playoff games start?” Bekah whispered as Jon spooned her.

“Uh...in a few days.” Jon kisses the shell of her ear. “Can we talk about this?” Jon’s fingers graze the left side of Bekah’s rib cage where the words Always yours were tattooed in a half cursive half print text. “This is definitely new.”

“Oh, um....yeah. I got a tattoo. Do you hate it?” Bekah’s fingers find Jon’s and interlaces hers with his as he continues to rub over the words.

“I like it. What’s it mean? If you want to share.” Jon pulls Bekah’s body further into his.

“I found an old birthday card from my grandpa around Christmas. He use to always sign my cards always yours, Gramps. That’s his handwriting.” Bekah spoke softly.

“That’s really special Beks. I’m just surprised you didn’t tell me.” Jon kisses her temple.

“You were thinking you were dying of the flu then pissed you sat out a game because of said flu. And then I wasn’t sure how to bring it up. Oh hey. If we ever have sex again I have a tat.” Bekah winces bringing back her thoughts that have plagued her brain for most of the beginning of 2016.

“Well I’ve been thinking the same thing about if we’d be here again honestly. Minus the new ink part of course.” Jon admitted.

Their conversation continued until both fell asleep with their bodies intertwined. The next morning Jon was sitting on the bed when Bekah woke up.

“Babe, we gotta get going. I have a bus then plane to catch.” His lips graze hers.

“Sorry. Someone kept me up all night.” She stretches out her arms and wraps them around his neck.

“Yeah, wasn’t as tired just watching the game.” Jon chuckles. “Let’s get ya to your car and I’ll see you in a few weeks?”

The Blackhawks playoff run was short lived. They lost in seven. Bekah picks up her phone at the end of game 7.

Bekah: Text when you want to talk.

A few hours later she got a response.

Jon: Thanks Beks.

She didn’t hear from him all week and she didn’t text him again trying to give him space. Brynn tried to get her to go out for drinks after work but all Bekah wanted to do was curl up and watch mindless television. Pulling into her parking spot she noticed a man in the car next to her. Not really looking she got her bag and headed towards her door.

“Beks?” Jon’s voice echoed off the wall. She slowly turned around to see Jon standing with a bag slung over his shoulder about 10 yards from her.

“Holy shit! What are you doing here?” Bekah clutched her chest realizing how startled he made her.

“Uh...I went to the airport to head home and changed my ticket.” Jon closes the distance.

“And you didn’t think to tell me?” She smacks at his chest and he captures her hand in place. “I haven’t heard from you since Monday.” Her eyes meet his and they were soft but intense.

“Sorry.” Was all he said but his face said there was more.

“Come in. If I knew you were coming I would have stocked my fridge for ya.” Bekah turns the key and they both kick off their shoes. Jon removes his bag and places it on the bench next to the entryway.

“It’s okay. We can order in or go out or whatever.”

“How long are you staying?” Bekah heads back to her room and Jon trails behind her sitting on her bed as she heads to the closet.

“Monday morning flight. I have some things to take care of at home. Plus Mom wants to celebrate my birthday.”

“Oh when is your birthday? I don’t think you’ve ever told me.” Bekah leans out of her closet pulling on one of Jon’s old shirts she kept.

“Um...today.” Jon admits.

“Jonathan Bryan Toews...TODAY is your birthday! Well we are going out for dinner. Hold on.” Bekah returns to her closest and finds a dress that is flirty but not too fancy and re-emerges.

“Damn Beks. I don’t think I’ve seen you in a dress before.” Jon stands and wraps her up in his arms.

“Well, we don’t exactly see each other with clothes on frequently.” Bekah smirks up at him.

“True. So where are you taking me?” Jon kisses her lightly.

“Hmmmm. Oh! The Guild House! It’s newer and I’ve never been. Plus I’m sure your face can get us in if there is a wait.” Bekah rubs Jon’s freshly shaved face and pats. “28 looks good on ya Tae.”

“Thanks Babe, I’m starving. Let’s go.” Jon pulls Bekah under his arm and the two make their way to the Short North.

Dinner was easy and they easily slipped back into their comfortable rhythm. Bekah got annoyed when Jon refused to let her see or pay for the bill. He just laughed it off.

“I know why you love this city.” Jon looks around as the they made their way back to his rental. “It’s a big city but feels very small town too.”

“Best of both worlds really.” Bekah smiles watching Jon explore a part of the city he’s never been. “Chicago is amazing but you know that.”

“Yeah.” Jon breathes out as they reach the car.

By the time they hit Bekah’s door their need for each other was felt. Jon presses his body against Bekah and wraps his arm around her abdomen holding her it him as she struggles to get the key in the door. His breath hot on her neck. “Tae, you are getting birthday sex just let me get the door open please!” She looked up at him as his eyes danced.

“Birthday sex eh?” He let his hand go from her stomach and backs up a little.

“Go ahead and head to my room. I need some water. Need anything?” Bekah kisses him.

“Only you.” Jon smirks and kisses her forehead as he retreats to her room. Bekah felt the blush in her cheeks as she got a glass of ice water and walked into her room. Jon was comfortably laying in his boxer briefs and carefully moved her larger colorful pillows off the bed. “Those are new yes?” He eyes the pile and back to Bekah who was placing the water on her nightstand.

“Yes. They usually take of up that side of the bed.” She points where Jon is laying. And his eyebrow shoots up but he doesn’t say anything as Bekah pulls her dress over her head and climbs in next to Jon. He kisses her with his hand holding her in place. She breaks for air. “Do you trust me?”

“With everything Beks.” He whispers and she wiggles out of his grip, toes over to her dresser and opens her top dresser drawer pulling out one of his ties. “How do you have that?” His eyebrow raises.

“It’s yours. You left it at one point.” She smirks climbing in and straddling Jon. She leans down and kisses him hard. His breath hitches. “Ready birthday boy? No touching.” He nods and she ties the tie around his eyes. Kissing down his chest she eyes her water and reaches for a piece of ice. Lightly touching it to Jon’s chest.

“Woah. Fuck. That’s cold Babe.” He jumps and she laughs.

“My hockey man doesn’t like the cold? Odd...” she moves the ice down the center of his chest and his muscles retract in it’s wake. Jon mumbles something above her head. “You good there Tae?” He nods his head and Bekah takes in his clenched jaw and hands tightly gripped on pillow. Tracing his abs with the ice she licks and kisses the trail. Jon panting and his hips jolt up. Bekah hums as she works her way to his waistband and she slowly pulls down his briefs settles her self between his legs. Placing the remaining ice in her mouth she starts kissing up his thigh then kisses his tip. Jon jolts and swears as she slides her mouth over him.

“Damn that’s so hot but also very fucking cold Beks.” Jon huffs out. “Can I touch you yet?” He’s breathless with his request.

“Is that what the birthday boy wants?” She licks up his length and takes in how unglued he has become under her.

“Yes. Very much so.” She slides up his body and loosens the tie. Jon grabs her hand and removes it while leaning up to kiss her. “My turn!” He grunts and flips Bekah onto the mattress. Removing her bra and panties with ease, Jon eyes Bekah’s glass. He pulls an ice cube from it and places the cube in his mouth. Starting at her nipples, Bekah’s body jolts with the sensation. Jon hums in the satisfying way she moves under him. He drops the ice cube between her breast and follows with his tongue as it slides down her body then keeps going down to her core. Sucking hard eliciting moans with every move he makes. Forgetting the ice on her navel, Jon moves his body back up and kisses Bekah passionately as he slides deep inside her. Finally letting go of their built up highs and praising each other as they come down from the overstimulation.

“Happy birthday Captain.” Bekah breathes out trying to catch her breath.

“Maybe I would call you Captain after that Beks.” Jon laughs as he kisses her temple.

“Funny Tae.” She buries her face in his chest. “I’m gonna need to change the sheet. You melted an ice cube on my stomach.” Bekah giggles as she feels the wet below her hip.

“Or just roll over.” Jon moves her body with ease and kisses the top of her head as she’s on his chest. “Come to Sedona with me this summer.” Jon whispers.

“What?” She says in his chest.

“We’ve both talked about how we love hiking and well...I have a trip planned before Worlds...and you should come with me.”

“Uh...Jon.” Bekah sits up and slides off him.

“Yes Beks.” His voices is soft as he brushes her hair out of her face.

“Jon, what are we?” Bekah leans further away from him to look deep into his brown eyes.

“What kind of question is that?” Jon’s nose scrunches up.

“Well we clearly are friends.” Bekah starts.

“Yes, the best of.” Jon finds her hand and intertwines his fingers wiggling them.

“And the sex is amazing...” Bekah closes her eyes with that unfinished statement.

“I fully concur.” Jon moans to verify his agreement.

“But what do you call this? What’s it’s title?” She motions between them.

“Does it need a name Babe?” Jon kisses her lips.

“I mean...We just...I don’t know Tae. I guess no.” Bekah huffs out.

“So back to my original question. Sedona....end of June? Yes?” Jon nudges her.

“Sounds doable.” Bekah laughs

“Doable huh? You know what’s doable?” Jon moves on top of her with a look that tells her she’s in for it.

“Poor choice of words I guess.” Jon laughs and dips down below the sheets. “Or not.”

[workingchemistry]

Hello my dearest and most beloved friend! How are you doing today? I hope your well. I, on the other hand, am not well. My “you-know-what” is here and it’s not good. Usually it has little to no effect but there’s sometimes where it hurts so much I can’t get out of bed and others where all I want is to be cuddled and sleep for days (which is what’s happening now(also sorry for the tmi lol)) Could I pretty please have just a sweet little something with O!Jay and Dami? Or maybe A!Kara? Thanks love❤

Hello darling! My love and my light. :) I’m doing okay. Trying to hard core focus on self care bc I’m burning out. I’m so sorry to hear. :( I highkey empathize with your experience. Don’t worry about tmi, it’s a natural part of the XX lifecycle. Wish I could give you all the hugs and lazy cuddles, but this’ll have to do instead. :) I was gonna do Kara, but then I was thinking about Dami and this is what I got. Hope you enjoy!

Most days Damian does not mind Todd’s penchant for playing the part of a pack omega. If only to himself, he can admit it’s not as though he is ever truly bothered by Todd’s warm nests and soft hugs. Though the lessons are annoying, he does not hate being taught to nest or cook. Todd has promised them to be useful skills and Richard corroborated the story in an unrelated conversation.

No. What Damian hates is when Todd speaks of Damian inheriting the pack.

He sits in silence, letting his anger ferment as Todd passes him another ball of noodle dough. For an omega with a reputation for withdrawn brutality, Todd certainly enjoys chatter. “Our alphas all have tunnel vision pretty bad, even Alfie. It’s your job as the pack omega to make sure they take care of themselves. Even Timtac. He’s one of the worst actually, even if he does have a schedule for “body maintenance” it’s all—“

It’s too much.

“Cease that at once.” Damian snaps. His rolling pin thuds on the marble counter top beside his down in a cloud of flour. “I’ll hear no more.”

“Dami...” Todd sucks on his teeth. He looks hurt. “I know you’re not besties, but I thought you and Timmy got along now.”

“We— what does Drake have to do with anything?” Damian asks. He has to fight down a growl. There’s nothing wrong with omegas growling, or so Todd says, but sometimes they cheapen your grievances. Everyone loves to blame hormones for an unruly omega.

“He—“ Todd starts, stops to consider Damian, and then sighs. His elbow lands in a pile of flour, narrowly missing rolled dough, when he goes to lean on it. “Okay, kiddo, I’ll bite. But you gotta explain yourself, I don’t know what’s upset you.”

“You—you—“ Damian splutters. Inexplicably his throat hurts. There are no words to explain what he feels when Todd speaks of leaving the pack. It hurts worse than Heretic’s sword. At one point he might have wanted the pack, though certainly he never wanted the position of pack omega, but now he has been rethinking his place in the pack. “You cannot. I refuse to allow it.”

“Can’t what, Dami?” Todd leans forward and nuzzles the top of Damian’s head with a soft croon. “I don’t understand, habibi. Explain.”

“You can’t leave again.” Damian’s hands fist in Todd’s red hoodie, smearing white across his back. Against his will, Damian’s gives a plaintive cry, the call of a pup to his mother. It bubbles out of him, black tar fear that scalds his throat. “You can’t leave me, Rasha.”

Todd’s arms sweep him up to nestle against to softness of his broad chest. The arms that bracket him in are strong and the scent that surrounds him is vanilla sweet. It slides over his skin like warm honey. Todd’s answering rumble vibrates through Damian’s bones, settling them. “I’m not leaving. No one is leaving you, pup. You’re safe.”

“You—“ Damian wants to sound accusatory, but his cursed pup instincts give everything a slight wail. “You’re the pack omega. You can’t leave.”

“Oh.” Todd’s hold shifts so they can sit, Damian draped across his chest. “I’m not leaving, I was.. I was waiting. Once you’ve been presented to society I was going to step down. I know pack omega isn’t pack alpha, but... I like to think it’s a pretty sweet gig.”

“You’re the pack omega.” Damian’s brain feels stuck like a buffering video. “I don’t—I’m not.”

“Okay. Okay.” Todd croons. “It was just an idea. I can keep the position as long as you want me to.”

“Forever.” Later, Damian knows he will deny this moment to the ends of the earth, but he hunches instinctively as small as he is able.

Todd wraps him up tighter, shielding Damian’s weakness from the world. “Okay. Forever then.”

He nuzzles behind Damian’s ear and then stands to head towards the servant’s tunnel. It leads to all of the main bedrooms, built long ago when there were servants to need them. It’s a question with an obvious answer, but he asks it anyway, “Where are we going?”

“Nest.”

Damian nods in response and lets his tired eyes drift shut. He doesn’t need to stand guard for once, Rasha will keep him safe and watch over the nest.

It’s what makes Todd such a good pack omeega.

[ficdirectory]

Disuphere (An AU Fosters family fic) Chapter 35

CHAPTER 35

THEN

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Missing: 4 months and 30 days

Josh was pretty sure he was the only kid in his class who had two first days of fourth grade.  It felt weird starting at a new school at the end of November.  (It felt like he had been Gone for years.)  All the other kids knew each other, and the rules.  Josh knew nobody.  And nobody knew him.

His teacher, Mrs. Lutz, did not like him because Josh had a hard time paying attention.  The first day, it was okay, but after that, she lost her patience and made him stand in the corner.  The boys in the back of the class noticed.  They didn’t like the teacher, either.  Josh made friends.

That winter, Josh got hurt in gym.  Another kid smacked him in the chin with his plastic floor hockey stick.  He kept playing until the girls in class screamed.  Josh froze.  There was blood on the floor.  On his shirt.

At the nurse’s office, she gave him ice and paper towels and she made him change his shirt.  He went into the bathroom for privacy.  Came out in a shirt way too big.  It had short sleeves.  It showed his skinny arms.  The marks on his wrists.

“What happened here?” she asked, concerned.

His heart pounded.

Josh took a deep breath.  He had to make her believe:

“Um...well...I just got adopted, and my family before this...they weren’t very nice to me,” Josh muttered, looking at his hands.

His voice got thick.  His eyes stung.  (Could hear Him in his head: “Tears.  Nice touch.”)  But he was really crying about the Fosters.  Because they were the family that never hurt him, not the one that did.  This was just what he used to say when kids asked why he lived with Stef and Lena.  And where were his real parents.

It was true but it wasn’t true.  And the lie made him feel like a horrible person.

“Oh.  I’m so sorry to hear that.  Nobody’s hurting you now, are they?”

Josh looked around.  Shook his head.  No one was hurting him right now.  He shut his tears off.

“No.”

“Do you need to go home?  I can call your parents.”

(Yes.)

Josh could see it in her eyes.  How bad she felt for him.  How much she wanted to help him feel safe by getting him back to someone who loved him.  Josh wanted that, too, more than anything.  But His words echoed in Josh’s head - the same ones every morning - before he got out of the car:

(“If you say anything, and I get a call about it?  Guaranteed, I’ll talk myself out of it.  Then?  You’re back home with me.  No time flat.  No one will believe you.”)

So, instead, he breathed deep.  “No.  I’m okay.  I don’t want to miss recess.”  His chin had stopped bleeding, so she let him go.  Halfway to the door, he turned to look at her:

“Thank you for helping me,” he said, and closed the door behind himself.

Monday, January 5, 2009

Missing: 1 year, 3 months and 29 days

When Josh came back to school the day after winter break ended in fifth grade, his eyes watered all the time.  It was annoying because everybody thought he was crying.  Really, his eyes had to readjust after another week in the pitch-black basement.  His eyes still were sensitive to light.

There was a word for it.  Photo-something.  (He made Josh practice it a million times, but he still forgot.  It kept getting mixed up with failure to thrive - the excuse He gave for Josh’s puny weight.)

Josh counted down the hours to lunch, resting his head on his desk.  Tiredness could do a lot of stuff, but Josh didn’t know it could make you feel sick, like throwing up, or sick in the head.  He missed having a bedtime.  A room that was just his.  He missed not having to pretend all the damn time.

“Looks like somebody still thinks it’s winter break…” Mrs. Smith said, teasing gently.  She put a hand on Josh’s shoulder and he reluctantly sat up.  Tried to wipe his eyes so he didn’t look like a total baby.  

Mrs. Smith got down next to him, speaking quietly.  “Is something wrong?” she asked.

Josh’s brain stalled.  What wasn’t wrong?  Even though he got to sleep in his own bed every night since Christmas, he still felt tired from the week Down There with no sleep and not enough food and water.  Even though he had food and water now, he was always worried about it.  And that meant he couldn’t focus in school.

“I have Failure.  And Photosynthesis,” Josh said softly, but kids still heard and snickered.

“Hey!  Josh’s a plant!” they cackled.

(“It’s photophobia, dumbass…” His voice said in Josh’s head.)

Mrs. Smith shushed the kids and turned again to Josh.  She was so nice.  She reminded Josh of Mama.  (So did the school nurse and everybody nice that was a teacher.  The cop at their school did not remind him of Mom, though.  He was too mean.)

“The light hurts my eyes,” he said.  “Can I have sunglasses?”

“Nope.  Sorry.  No sunglasses in school.  But we can turn off the lights in a bit when we watch our movie for Social Studies.  Deal?”

“Okay,” he managed.

“You sure you’re okay?  You weren’t hibernating in a cave, over break, were you?”  Her eyes sparkled with the joke, but Josh could also see she cared.

“I actually didn’t get that much sleep…” he admitted.  Being so tired made him dumber.  It made him say more than he was supposed to.  Josh pressed his lips together.

“Too much fun?” she guessed.  She didn’t wait for an answer, just patted his arm and said:  “Get some sleep tonight, okay?”

“Yeah,” Josh nodded.

But he knew sleep was never guaranteed.  If it came, or when it came, that stuff was never up to Josh.  It was up to Him.  Josh’s job was to do whatever He said, whenever He said, otherwise He might not need Josh anymore.

Otherwise, He might get Mariana instead.

Missing: 2 years and 1 day

Journal Entry #2 Tuesday September 8, 2009

My name is Josh Mitchell.  I live with my dad.  I dont have brothers or sisters.  Its just me and him. I am in 6th grade and I can’t belive it.  It is hard in middle school.  There are to many classes and not much time to get to them.  I like jim class, but some times i am soar from growing pains and i have to sit out.  My favorite thing is sports and video games.  

Josh

Missing: 2 years and 5 days

Journal Entry #7 Saturday September 12, 2009 DONT READ

I hate this.  I really really really really really really really hate it.  I wish stuff was so different.  I wish Dad respected me more.  I wish I had a mom some times.  I think it would be nicer to have a mom.  The weekends are the hardest.  Beacuse he is always home and bugging me to do stuff and I dont want to I just want to be alone and watch TV.  He doesnt care about me one bit.  I think if I ever get to grow up and be a dad i will be different.  I will respect my son and not be mean to him.

Josh

Missing: 2 years, 3 months and 16 days

What am I Haiku #4 Wednesday December 23, 2009 DON’T READ

Deep inside the dark

I wait for someone to come

But they can’t save me.

Missing: 2 years, 3 months and 30 days

Journal entry #1 Wednesday January 6, 2010

Dads family came to visit at the break.  It was nice to see everyone.  I got presents like video games and a bike and clothes.  I ate tons of food and got so stuffed I almost got sick.  It was the best.  My cousin is still here.  It’s K.A. to have someone to hang out with other then Dad.  (No offence Dad.)  - Josh

Missing 2 years, 5 months and 26 days

Journal entry #1 Friday March 5, 2010

Today’s my birthday.  I’m 12.  I want to stay home but Dad says we should celebrate.  Said “How about a movie?”  So, we’re going but I feel super bad.  First, the only thing playing is Alice in Wonderland.  Boring.  (And CREEPY, am I right?)  Mostly I feel bad that my cousin can’t come with us.  It is such a bummer going to a movie I don’t want to see, without even my cousin there to mock it.  Oh well.  I’ll have to remember the dumb parts extra so I can tell him later. - Josh

Missing: 2 years, 8 months and 10 days

Journal entry #3 Monday May 17, 2010

Gotta give a happy birthday shoutout to my bestie, as the girls say.  Hope I can see you soon. - Josh

Missing: 2 years and 9 months

Journal entry Monday June 7, 2010

I can’t believe 6th grade is over tommorrow.  I use to think rating in a notebook was dumb but its not that bad to keep a journal.  I mite keep it going this summer to see how long I can make it.  Thanks for the idea Mrs. A.  I won’t miss being a baby 6th grader but I will miss you. Bye.  Josh

[angel-with-a-shotgun99-blog]

Request PJ

This was requested by @mrsdeanwinchester15

It took forever but here it is dude.

Concept: Pj and reader have been friends but not able to meet as he lives in England and her in America. Reader finds out he’s at PAX and surprises him. °°°°°°°°°°°°°° I’ve known Pj for the last year. We met on twitter. I had tweeted a meme of Dan and he favorited it and messaged me. We became really good friends and I’ve started falling for him. I love everything about him. His laugh, the way his eyes crinkle when he smiles, his eyes, they are amazing. I wish I could meet him. Like in person.

My phone buzzes in my pocket. I pull it out and see a text from Pj.

KickTheBestie: hey love!

Y/n: Hey.

KickTheBestie: how are you?

Y/n: I’m good. Why are you alive rn?

KickTheBestie: I have to finish packing for PAX. My flight leaves in like 6 hours.

Y/n: I told you not to procrastinate.

KickTheBestie: i didn’t mean to. But i really need to pack. Love ya.

Y/n: Love you too.

I sit on the couch and continue looking through the movie options on Netflix. In just a few days I get to meet my best friend. I settle on a movie, but I end up drifting off to sleep.

2 days later

I wake up and look at my phone. It’s 5 am. ‘Well going back to sleep isn’t gonna happen,’ I think to myself as I stand up and stretch. What am I supposed to do all day? My brain is running a mile a minute, I get to meet PJ today. The best part is he has no idea. One of my friends is working PAX and is making sure I get mic at his panel so I can ask a question.

My phone starts ringing. I look at it and it’s my friend Amanda. She’s the one helping me out, “Hey dude. What’s up?”

“I just got to the event center. I’m not working the panel, but I have someone who’s gonna make sure you get the mic.” She tells me her plan. A small squeal escapes my lips, I’ve wanted this day to come for a year. God he’s my everything and he doesn’t even know.

PJ’s POV

My alarm goes off, I look at my phone and it says 6 am. I’m freaking nervous for my panel today. I hit the home button and am greeted with the face my best friend sticking her tongue out. I set the photo as my wallpaper awhile ago. God Y/n had the same feelings for me as I do for her. She’s so beautiful. I hate that she’s so close but so far away. She’s 3 hours away from me.

I get out of my scratchy hotel bed and put on some black skinny jeans and my Slurp t-shirt. My phone makes a noise and I look and see a text from her.

Girl of My Dreams: Good luck bestie! Love you.

Me: thanks darlin. I wish you could have come to PAX so I could meet you irl.

Girl of My Dreams: Same, but I have to work.

Me: I know. Love you. I gotta go get food before I go to the event center.

Girl of My Dreams: okay. Talk to you later.

I put my phone in my pocket and grab my stuff. Walking down the hall I run into Sean and Mark.

“Hey PJ!” Sean waves and Mark nods to me.

“Sup guys?” I reply.

“Gettin’ food, wanna join us?” Mark offers.

“Sure sounds like a plan.”

Your POV

The drive to Seattle is boring, but I’m so excited. Panic! At The Disco’s Death of a Bachelor blasts through my car. I look at the clock on the dash; 11:30. I have 2 hours til his panel. I should be there in about an hour.

Traffic is pretty light. My stomach turns. What if he doesn’t like me in person? What if he thinks this creepy? This is such a bad idea. I feel the anxiety starting to bubble inside of me. No, I’m doing this. I have to meet my best friend. This is the only chance I’ll have for awhile.

I find a parking spot and go into the event center. There are ton of people. I make my way to where the panel is and find a spot in the middle.

A guy with a head set and radio walks up to me, “You’re Amanda’s friend, right?”

“Yeah that’s me.” I reply.

“Okay so I’m gonna let a few people get some questions in. You must really care about him huh?”

“Yeah I do. Thank you for doing this for me.” I smile at him.

“Sure thing.” He returns the smile and walks away. I look at my phone and see a twitter mention. PJ tweeted a picture of me. “@y/t/n is my best friend. I couldn’t do any of this without her” I smile at my phone and favorite the tweet.

20 minutes later PJ and the other people on his panel come on stage and start talking and taking questions. After a few minutes the guy hands me the mic. My stomach does flips as I stand up. No going back now. “I have a question for PJ.” I say, my hands shake.

“Go for it.” He says, not recognizing my voice.

I get a sudden bit of confidence, “How does it feel to know your best friend is talking to you in person right now?” A wave of confusion washes over his face, then he starts smiling.

“Oh my god! You’re here!” He yells and hops down from the stage. People get out of his way and he runs up and hugs me. He smells so amazing. His arms wrap tightly around my waist. “I can’t believe you’re here.” He mumbles into my hair.

“Me either.” I say back. There is a ton of awes from the crowd. “I’ve never been so happy.” I say pulling away.

He grazes my cheek with the back of his hand, “I can’t believe you’re really here.”

“You have a panel to do. Go have fun. We can hang out after.” I hug him again, we hold on like this is the last time we will ever see each other.

PJ’s POV

I step on stage and my stomach does flips over and over. People cheer when me and my panel mates get on stage. A few people ask me questions.

A girl stands up and mumbles into the mic, “I have a question for PJ.”

“Go for it.” I say reassuringly.

“How does it feel to be talking to your best friend in real life right now?” I’m confused for a second and then recognition hits me. It’s her. It’s really her.

“Oh my God! You’re here!"A smile spreads across my face. I hop down from the stage and move through the crowd as fast as I can. I instantly pull her into a hug.

I bury my face in her hair, "I can’t believe you’re here.”

“Me either.” She chuckles. People coo at us. “I’ve never been so happy.” She pulls away and smiles at me. God I’ve fallen hard.

I touch her cheek, “I can’t believe you’re really here.”

She smiles at me, God I love that smile, “You have a panel to do. Go have fun. We can hang out after.” She hugs me again. I never want to let go.

[authoramandawilson]

I screwed up.

Severely.

I committed the biggest, most horrendous crime as a writer and mental health advocate.

I forgot to update my blog over the last month.

*Cue Psycho violin screech music*

In my defence, most of September and October have been a whirlwind of non-stop hustling and bustling, and it was only my birthday weekend past that I realized how much I put my blog on the back burner in an attempt to keep up with other writing demands.

And let’s be realistic, being a stay-at-home, freelance writer doesn’t mean I get lots of free time. Most days I’m barred up in my writing den with my cats and dog, smashing my keyboard as I try to get projects done while fuelled by one too many ice caps and chai lattes.

Should I have been paying more attention to my blog? Yes. Am I an idiot for putting off this recent post? Oh, yeah! Could I have been more attentive? Hell yes, but sometimes life has a way of drifting to more pressing matters, and sometimes you gotta sacrifice in one area in exchange for something else.

In lieu of putting Fighting the Good Fight on a brief hiatus, I spent the last six weeks focusing on promoting Lemonade Stand and travelling for my unofficial (and very underpaid) book tour. I spent over two weeks travelling around Newfoundland, personally delivering books to fans, friends, and family. I racked up km’s on my Rav, I spent way too much money at Tim Hortons (on ice caps and blueberry muffins, of course) and took a few days here and there to spend time with long-lost friends and family.

How I kept up with everything over the last six weeks is beyond me, and the thought that after Tuesday we’re heading into the Christmas season, I’ll be lucky if I keep up with all the demands and expectations. (Lets hope I do!)

That’s not to say I didn’t have fun over the last few weeks either. I get to spend every day doing something I love – writing and more writing. I get to lose myself in my manuscripts and recently, I’m really into writing a lot of poetry. (Thanks Rupi Kaur!) At the end of the day, it’s a lot of pain and fun, but I couldn’t be happier.

(Now if only I could stick to a better sleep schedule.)

So in ode to a crazy, fun, busy, and overwhelming six weeks, I decided to compile a list of all the adventures I have been losing myself in. So settle in, grab an ice cap, and enjoy the highlight reel.

Getting to Play Band Groupie to Rough Hands

What’s better than best friends and great local music?

When they’re together of course!

I was lucky enough to have my friends from the band Rough Hands on the west coast, lending them a place to crash and spending time together toward the end of their Eastern Canada tour. It was a very impromptu stay, but we had fun and I was thankful to get to see some faces I haven’t seen in a while. Their show was absolutely fantastic and I was giddy to play band groupie for the weekend.

Seriously, check them out. Luke and this band mates are making some great music. They’re 100% gonna make it to the big leagues – no doubt about it!

(Just remember who offered you a bed and shower when you’re rich and famous some day. 😉 )

Check them out here and here!

*Out of the Dark is available on iTunes!*

Book Launch and Unofficial Province Book Tour

Mid-September, after I spent several days personally signing books and writing messages to all the 110 wonderful people who personally bought Lemonade Stand off of me, I packed up my Rav4 and headed across NL to promote and deliver my book to masses.

Through my book tour, I got to meet a lot of new people, listen to other people’s struggles with mental health issues, and talk book writing. It was a great and exhausting two weeks travelling around (and getting lost a few times!). Don’t worry, I plan to honour this experience in a future blog post. (Coming soon!)

Chris de Burg Concert and St. John’s Adventures

In all fairness, I had other motives besides my book tour to head across the province. I had tickets booked to Chris de Burg’s concert with my mama. Having Mom raise me on the right kind of music, I have only been waiting to see him live since I was thirteen. With the launch of his new cd A Better World, it didn’t take much begging and pleading for Mom to agree to come with me.

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I was excited beyond belief when he walked out on stage. I laughed. I cried. I sang at the top of my lungs. (Sorry Mom.) I danced wildly around in my seat. (Sorry Mom.) I clapped a lot and cheered super loud (Again, sorry Mom.), but I had the time of my life. One of the best concerts I’ve been to at Mile One (and that includes The Backstreet Boys). And lets just say, I wasn’t the only one losing my cool when he ended the show with “Patricia the Stripper”. (Right, Mom? 😉 )

 I also planned things for my wedding and finally got to say Yes to the Dress! It took a few hours, a mild panic attack and a few happy tears later, but I’m glad to finally have another item checked off the Thomas Wedding list.

In addition to all the wedding fun, I curbed my adventures back to book research and with the help of my best friend, I spent some time exploring St. John’s, making sure that I was getting details and descriptions right for my upcoming NL novel.

Besides I got to spend a lot of time on Signal Hill, taking in the view (despite the cold) and I finally got to see the Canada 150 sign while getting to pose for some pictures with my bestie at the historic site. I also got to see Quidi Vidi for the first time ever, which was a real treat. (It’s pretty bad I lived here my whole life and I’m only now seeing great land marks. Fail.)

Despite acting like a tourist, I did get a lot of information for my manuscript and I know it will all pay off in the long run when my NL novel is finally complete.

You’re welcome in advance.

    Working on my NL Novel

Once I concluded my book tour, and book research, and my mini vacation home, I finally mucked back to Corner Brook and remained held up in my writing den for weeks on end. While still trying to working on getting We Were Fighters published (and exploring self-publishing options as well), I’ve been spending a lot of time on my new manuscript, a fiction novel based in my home province of Newfoundland.

Knowing that only publishing houses here on The Rock will only take on NL content manuscripts, I’m hoping that this could be my first foot in the door to getting my novels out there. Within three weeks I had banged out over a hundred plus pages, turning my eyes and brain to absolute mush. As I mentioned before, being a writer is lots of pain and fun, and despite being hooked on caffeine and severely sleep deprived, I’m having a lot of fun writing this novel and creating a small taste of NL culture.

But with the goal to have the manuscript finished before Christmas, I still have a long way to go! Writer’s block had me stuck a few times and as a haphazard writer who doesn’t write in linear fashion, I find myself getting caught up in wanting to write the exciting parts vs. “the middle”. A terrible flaw on my behalf.

But don’t worry, I’m a pretty disciplined writer and with less than a hundred pages to go, I’m hoping that by 2018, this could be a potential published work.

Wish me luck.

  Hiking and Halloween Birthday

Of course, October isn’t my favourite month just because CB is absolutely one of the most beautiful places in the world during the fall. I also get to look forward to a string of friends’ birthdays (including my own) and of course, Halloween and lots of horror movies!

While admittedly, October brought about a brief depression episode, I still managed to trudge through most of my writing duties, even if it felt like pulling teeth some days (and bouts of relentless anxiety). A week leading up to my birthday, I could barely pull myself out of bed, and tragically, I lost one of my childhood pets. My dear cat Sam, who was lucky to have eighteen long years of life. He made his journey over the Rainbow Bridge the day before my birthday, so celebrating this year was followed with fleeting moments of sadness and mourning.

Rest peacefully, old man. ❤

But despite losing one of my oldest pals, I did get to spend a wonderful weekend in Gros Morne, hiking with the crowd to celebrate one of my friend’s birthdays. While it was cold, we were severely hungover, and it snowed, we managed to hike Green Gardens without coming across any bears and barely escaping the obvious signs of a huge-ass bull moose. All in all, a successful trip up the Coast.

Thankfully though, I got to end October on a high note. Not only did my birthday fall on a Friday this year, I also got to have a Halloween birthday party with my best friends. Following a week of bad anxiety and fatigue, and the death of my kitty cat, my birthday turned out to be a great night of friends, fun, and laughter – and really how could I ask for more? 

Considering I spent the last two Halloweens either working or stuck on the couch with the stomach flu, I was glad I finally got to put my Phoenix costume to good use. After a few weeks of practicing cosplay makeup and putting finishing touches on my costume, I was able to bring one of my favourite X-Men characters to life. Of course, Zack gave Hugh Jackman a run for his money as a Logan/Wolverine look-a-like.

Besides, we had fun putting off a very funny – and very drunk – photo shoot. We had comic book heroes from all universes, we had some crossover hybrid characters, and witches. But hey, having Lego Batman there was definitely the most fun – especially when trying to watch your bestie struggle to drink through that face mask.

My birthday was a great end to a fast-paced month. Despite all the chaos, and work loads, and the threats of approaching deadlines, it was nice to take a few nights just to enjoy company with those I care about most. Sometimes we get lost in the mundane of every day life, and sometimes we get too caught up in our own lives to remember to spend time with others. So I was grateful for the few moments of peace and hilarity in a busy schedule. ❤

Even though I had lost track of time and let six weeks zip by without realizing how much I had been neglecting my duties to my blog, I am thankful for the chaos and havoc that has been my life for the last several weeks.

Autumn has come and gone before I realized it, and give it a few more day, there will likely be snow on the ground. While I am no where near ready for winter, and even less prepared for the enclosing Christmas season, I’ve been reflecting lately on how lucky I have been this last year – getting to spend my time perusing my writing career. It’s far from perfect, and I’m making nickels compared to the dollars I was making serving tables, but I’m the happiest I’ve been in months, and that’s all that matters. Happiness is all that matters – it’s that hard and that simple.

So what if it means cutting back on ice caps and lattes or spending more nights eating in than out? Being “poor” doesn’t mean being unhappy. I had a great fall and instead of ending this blog post on a big sappy metaphor – how my life is changing like the colour of the leaves (See what I did there?), I’m getting one more season closer to my dreams.

So sometimes life gets hectic and I ignore my duty to my blog.

Sometimes I fall behind on writing duties at the expense of other writing projects, and sometimes I forget to reach out to friends and family more often than not – but that’s life. I’ve been on a wild ride these last two months and I can only wait with anxious breath about the impending winter adventures that I’m sure are in store.

Worst comes to shove, I can always write an apology blog post to make up for it all.

So here’s to next season, and the next blog post. I’ll see you guys soon.

And as always,

Fight the good fight.

-A xo

Adventures, (Unofficial) Book Tour, Endless Ice Caps, Manuscript Writing, and Blog Fails I screwed up. Severely. I committed the biggest, most horrendous crime as a writer and mental health advocate.

[puckngrind]

Skating Lessons part 7

Summary: Reader has a coffee date with Amy Jones and the bestie asks all the Josh questions.  

Warnings: swearing, mentions of sex...

Word Count: 1992

Series Masterlist

“CBJ...CBJ...CBJ...”  Mason is yelling at the tv while in his Anderson jersey and pajama pants.  “Momma, look, Josh just did our special signal!” Mason was bouncing around while the commentators talked over the pre-game video.  Sure enough, Josh was standing there laughing with Seth and hitting pucks.  He then stops, does a spin and touches his head.  You laugh as Mason does the same thing.

“That’s awesome Sweetie!”  You laugh and take a video of Mason doing the move again to send to Josh.

Bethany plops on the couch next to you with coffee in hand and a look on her face.  “When did you and JOSH come up with this move, Maze?”  Your best friend had called Mason this since he was a baby.

Mason jumps on the couch between the two of you and announces that they came up with it a few skates ago.  You had witnessed this move before but didn’t realize your boys would do it every time you were at the ice.  NOW you realized Josh was connecting with Mason even on road trips.  Bethany shot you another look you could read without words.  She was annoyed that you hadn’t told her about any of this Josh stuff.  You bring your legs up causing your shorts to ride up.

“Momma, you are hurt.  What happened?”  Mason stops bouncing and hugs you.

“Uh, I ran into something at work.  I’m fine, Baby.  First score and you are headed to bed okay?  You can watch the game tomorrow.”  

Your face turns bright red as you here Beth say under breathe, “yeah, you fell on Josh’s face, huh?”  

“What Auntie Beth?”  Mason turned his attention to Bethany and you gave her a death look.

“Did you see Josh’s face?”  Beth recovers from her comment and you are sure she can feel your thoughts as she continues.  “I bet he scores first!”  She survived that slip up and Mason’s full attention is on the game.  Sure enough Josh has the puck and sails it to Seth who shoots it into the net.  

“GOOOOAAAALLLL” Mason shouts.  And with that you put Mason to bed and crashed on the couch to hear all the questions Bethany had about your relationship with Josh.  You answered the basics while watching the game.  The main question she asked was why she hadn’t heard about it and you avoided all her questions about how good the sex was.  

“That’s fine.  I can only imagine how mind blowing it is.”  Bethany pats your leg where Josh had marked you up.  You tuck your knees under your Anderson sweatshirt and you sit your coffee cup on your knees.  “So, what’s it like dating a professional athlete?”  Beth continues her questions as you stare at the game.  Thankfully the Blue Jackets were up by 3 and Josh had 2 assists so far.

“Beth, I’m going to be honest.”  You took a deep breath but kept looking at the game.  “When we are together I don’t even think about the fact that he plays hockey for a living.  Like he’s just Josh.  Obviously I KNOW he’s a professional athlete but he’s so much more than that.  And the other guys are so down to earth and they all love Mason so much.  He was star struck for a second but he’s so comfortable with them.  It’s weird and amazing.  YES!  BABY!”  Your confession is stopped by Josh landing one in the back of the net with 5 minutes left of the 3rd. 

Bethany brings you right back to the conversation as she takes in your celebration, “So you are really watching the game huh?”  You just shake your head as the minutes tick down.  “And you’ve hung out with the team?” “Well, we went down to the family room after the game...you know the one that someone took our pictures...” Your words catch in your throat but you continue,  “and a few of the guys came to the zoo with us Sunday.” “Wait, you got his teammates to go to the zoo with you three?”  Beth’s face was squished up trying process all of this.  She was not use to you dating at all and now this.

“Well, Josh invited a few of the boys so it didn’t look like a date after the social media stuff.  I’m meeting Amy Thursday because I have questions and Seth suggested we talk.” “I know I’ll get use to it but the fact that you just talked about the queen of hockey moms and her All-Star son like they are Sally and Jay next door is pretty crazy.”  You laugh because you hadn’t noticed it yourself how you weren’t starstruck by any of them.  Your phone vibrates and you see a text. 

Josh: I’m glad he saw it.  He looks adorable.  Is Bethany still there?  I want to Facetime when I get back to my hotel room. 😉

You: I’m not sure what you are planning but yes, she’s here but leaving.

“Ew, are you two...sexting?”  Bethany laughs but her eyebrows are furrowed.

“Um...no...”  You answer and she’s not convinced.  Beth leaves and you plop on your bed waiting for Josh to facetime you.

“There’s my girl!  Say hi to PL, (y/n).”  Josh gives you the look and pulls his phone back to see PL sitting behind him on the couch.  

“Hey Luc!  Mason asked when you were going to race him on the ice today.  I told him you might lose after all that ice cream.”  You giggle and PL just shakes his head.  

“So...the hotel messed up our block.  We are have roommates regardless...and PL called me.  I think he knew I’d call you.”  You see Josh look over at him and then his eyebrows moved to tell you more.  “Beth okay with everything?” “Yeah, I mean I was questioned the whole game.  I did see your three assists and goal Babe.  Nice job.”  Josh’s face turned red.  While you started watching more hockey on purpose you really never talked hockey with Josh much. He talked to Mason but not you which may be why you never thought about the fact that he was who he was when you were together.

The two of you talked a little more before PL started whining he couldn’t hear the movie he put on so you hung up with Josh.

“You must be (y/n)!” you here from behind you as you sit at a high top table in the corner of the little cafe down the street from the arena.  Amy Jones had her hands up coming in for a hug.  “The boys have told me so much about you already!  I was so excited to meet the girl who has stolen Josh’s heart.  He’s been waiting for you for so long you know.”  Amy was exactly what Bethany described her.  The queen of hockey moms and she was easy to talk to.  You talked all about her boys and how she was thankful social media really wasn’t a thing when they were growing up.  Being in the spotlight with kids and the lifestyle Josh, Seth, and the other boys have.  She was exactly what you needed.  

“Sweetie, I know you are worried but you just have to follow your heart and trust your gut.”  Amy puts you hand on yours as you swirl your spoon around your coffee.  “From everything Seth has told me, you are the most amazing mother and clearly you’ve done an amazing job.  Now am I saying Mason won’t find his way to some craze fans rant?  No.  It may happen but let Josh and his people deal with the crazy people.  Just love both of your boys and constantly make sure you are there for each other.”  Your eyes started to fill with tears at the thought Amy was putting in your brain.  “Plus, I’m always here for you too.  And Shelly will love you too.  She told me she cannot wait to meet you this weekend.”  You gulp at the thought of meeting Josh’s parents and Amy laughs.

“Are you sure?  I haven’t exactly met parents in awhile.”  You look down at your drink then up at Amy.  Her head was tilted to the side and she smiles.  

“Um, duh!  I’m just mad Seth didn’t see you first.”  She laughs and you feel yourself lighten up.  “Do you like pedis?  Maybe we can before I head out next weekend?  I usually drag Seth and Josh but I’d love a girls trip.”   She pops up and hugs you tight before dropping her hands to yours.  “Josh loves you and so will his family and all the other stuff with fall into place.  Just take it all in stride.”  

With that you leave with less questions about being with Josh and more dates with his world.

Josh: How did coffee with Amy go?

You: Amazing.  I cannot wait to see you tonight.

Josh: Tell Mace I added an extra move for you to our secret signal

You: Oh really?!?  Thankful the game starts at 5pm btw.  Mace will be able to catch most of it.

Josh: And I’ll be home sooner.  I gotta go.  ILY.

Just like Tuesday, You and Mason watching the game.  You mentioned to Mason that Josh put a new move on their signal that was meant to you.  Mason was intently watching and then Josh did it.  He spun around put his hand on his head and then drops it down to his heart and pumps it.  You are thankful it’s just Mason watching the game with you because your face immediately flush with Josh’s public declaration and you were turned on because while it was public no one really would knew what he’s doing.  The boys did funny things like sweep or pretend to fish so Josh’s spin move would be seen as nothing more than him being silly.  The signal would be special to just you and Mason.

The game started and it wasn’t going well.  While the boys were playing as hard as they were but calls were missed and shots were just not going in.  You put Mason to bed after the loss and waited for Josh’s text.  He didn’t so before you slid into bed you put a key under the mat and sent him a message about it.

You have no idea what time it is but you the covers move and Josh’s warm body slides in behind you.  He wraps his arm around you and pulls you in.  You moan is groggy as you rub your eyes to wake up.

“Go back to sleep, Babe.”  Josh whispers into your hair followed by kisses along your neck.  “I just want to lay like this with you.”  You turn slightly and reach your hand to his face.  He kisses your lips slightly.

“I’m glad you are back.  I missed you.”  You kiss him again and he groans.

“So my parents want to have dinner tomorrow.  With us and Mason.  I said it was fine but needed to check with you” Josh rubs your arm and goosebumps run right along with his fingers.

“Yeah, I guess.  And you can stay here tomorrow if you want?”  You say with ease.  Josh’s arms flex around you.

“Are you sure (y/n)?  What about...”  You place your lips on his to stop Josh from finishing his sentence.  

“I think I’m okay with it.  I’m pretty sure Mason is.  Plus I want to spend every moment I can with you.”  He kisses you again and you feel his lips curl up into a smile.

“That’s exactly what I was hoping for.”  Josh caresses your face.  “Now let’s get some sleep, okay?”  You nod in agreement and flip your body so your back is pressed against Josh’s naked chest.  “Maybe we can get up early and...”  With that you gave Josh an elbow into his abs and he chuckles.  “That wasn’t a no was it?”

It wasn’t...