#in an arc where we got 'stay in the 17th with me' what i took away from it was 'see you later ailette rodeline :))'

[microwaving-tesilid-argente]

me rereading the magic republic dungeon burst fight

[monako-jinn-stories]

Howzer X Fem!Reader FanFic

Rebels on the Run

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Multi-part Stories Master List

Chapter Three

Chapter Five

Chapter Four

The sun burns against your back as you squint to block out the sand blowing in your direction. A lot has been happening at the Imperial base today, and although it’s time to start heading back, you can’t manage to get yourself to budge. Something important could be happening, and you need to make sure you find out everything that you can. The only issue with staying is Howzer.

You have no way to contact him and ensure that you are alright. All that you can do is hope that he doesn’t get the urge to set out and start looking for you himself. You’re always back on time, you make sure of it, so only the Maker knows what he’s going to be thinking when you’re late.

“Shit,” you mutter to yourself as you watch a patrol group head out. If they spot you, it’s all over. Your hiding and surviving will have been for nothing, and you can’t let that happen. “I really am going to regret this,” you sigh quietly before holding your arm out. The sand under your speeder begins to shake, and you watch as it disappears below the sediment. Before you make your next move, you scan the area to see where the troops have gone. “Just like I thought,” you mumble, noticing them beginning to sweep a wide arc in your direction. You quickly place your palms on the ground, focusing on burying yourself in the gritty sand, leaving only a small pocket for you to breathe in.

Silently, you wait to hear the sounds of their speeders go by, but as soon as they get close, they start to slow down. Panic sets in as you fear that a gust of wind might have uncovered your own speeder, but it isn’t possible with how far you’d buried it. Maybe they had seen you, and were about to uncover you-

“Just hurry up, Derrik. I don’t want to be reprimanded for being slower than those clones.”

“Oh relax, Scill. There’s no way we could be slower than those tube worms.”

“Yeah, but still. We’re already doing this because we got in trouble, and I don’t want to get in any more.”

“Alright, alright, I’m done anyway. Just let me zip up my pants and we can be off again.”

It takes a lot of self control not to reveal yourself and attack those troopers. You know the Empire is switching to nat-born soldiers, but to hear them talking so horribly about the clones makes your blood boil. But your safety is also a concern, and if you harm them, that could be all that’s needed to hunt you down. 

“I wonder if we could get them to send us out to hunt for that Jedi and clone Captain.”

“What? Who are you talking about?”

“That one Jedi, it was a woman. General of the 17th battalion, I think. They found her wreck site but there was no body. She’s gotta have escaped.”

“There’s no way she survived, I was there in the crew who found the ship. Some scavenger probably took her body.”

“But none of the ship’s parts?”

“Look, Derrik, I don’t know. All I know is that we need to get going.”

“The clone captain was Captain Howzer. He was a close friend of General Syndulla’s. I wonder if some of the Twi’leks helped him. Or if he’s with the Jedi.”

“It doesn’t matter, it’s not our paygrade, anyway. Now let’s go before we get in more trouble.”

When you’re sure that they’ve gone far enough, you bring the sand down around you and unbury yourself, doing the same with your speeder. You grimace as you look at your clothes, feeling the grit in your boots as well. “I don’t like sand,” you mutter, “It’s coarse, and rough, and irritating,” you continue to rant as you climb onto your speeder and start to head home, “and it gets everywhere. Especially here. I can’t imagine living on Tatooine.” When the words fall out, you feel a pang in your chest. You glance to the sky, watching as the stars begin to appear. “I’m sorry we failed you, Anakin,” you mumble to the darkness. “I wish we could have brought you home.”

~~~

When you arrive back at your hideout, you walk straight into the pond and fall forward, letting the water completely engulf your body. Only after you’re fully in do you consider that taking your boots off beforehand would have been a good idea. When you push yourself back up to the surface, you’re met with the concerned and shocked eyes of Howzer.

“Where have you been?” he immediately questions, “and what happened to you? Are you alright?”

“I’m fine,” you reply, crawling from the water and plopping down on a rock, “there was just some interesting and slightly concerning things happening at the base. I wanted to stay for as long as possible, which led to me almost being discovered.”

“Is that why you looked like a sand monster when you came back?”

“Yes, I buried myself and my speeder in the sand to stay hidden. I think next time I’ll just give myself up. There’s sand everywhere, even in places I don’t know how it got to.”

“Well, I’m glad you’re alright,” he says, a small smile coming to his lips. “When you’re done, I have some spare dinner for you. I made it to line up with your return, but seeing as you were late,” he chuckles before shrugging his shoulders and walking away. 

You watch his retreat before pushing yourself up, clothes now clinging to you and giving you a chill. Water and sand pour out of your boots when you remove them, and you sigh as you find sticks to put them on so they can dry out. Afterwards, you grab the dinner Howzer had set aside for you, and make your way to your room.

“Mind if I come sit with you?” Howzer says from your doorway. You look up and smile at him, nodding before making room for him to sit next to you.

“How was your day?” you ask, and he lets out a sigh while stretching his legs out.

“Not the worst, but could have been better. I tried creating a single person game…it didn’t quite work out,” he chuckles. “I also tried planting, so we might have some new food in a couple weeks. Or I might not have done that right and we might just have to keep going to the markets.”

“The markets aren’t so bad,” you reply, “but I guess we don’t have many credits.”

“And no way to earn them,” he adds. You sit quietly for another minute, and you can feel his eyes on you as you eat.

“It’s good,” you say, confirming his silent question. His grin widens and you let out a small laugh of your own. “I’d say you might make an okay chef in a couple months.”

His expression turns to one of fake offense, and he lets out a playful scoff before folding his arms over his chest. “You know, you’re not much better at cooking.”

“But at least all of my meals are edible,” you retort with a snicker. He just sticks his tongue out and rolls his eyes at you before turning away and letting a small smile return to his lips. You finish your meal and set your plate to the side before looking back at Howzer. His eyes hold a distant look, and his normally relaxed features have a new look on them. But you don’t let your mind linger on that for long, as the moonlight seems to be illuminating the scar on his chin. Slowly, you reach out and let your fingers brush over it, the action startling Howzer briefly. “Sorry,” you whisper, pulling your hand back.

He smiles and shakes his head, turning to look outside again. “No, you’re alright. I just wasn’t expecting it.”

“The light makes it seem to glow.”

Howzer remains silent, his eyes trained forward, almost as if he’s focusing on something. You look out as well, curious to see if there is anything out there. Nothing but the walls of your hideout and the stars above them can be seen. “I was very worried earlier,” he starts to say slowly, bringing your attention back to him, “I worried that something had happened, that maybe you’d been caught.”

“Well, I’m safe,” you reply, not knowing what else to say.

He just shakes his head, closing his eyes tightly before opening them again. “They wouldn’t have killed you,” he mutters, “they would have tortured you, pried all the knowledge they could from you, used you as bait for other Jedi. Then they would have experimented on you, and only when you were a lifeless, force drained creature, would they have killed you.”

It’s your turn to be silent now as his words sink in. You’ve always had the suspicion that they might use you for something horrible, but hearing it confirmed gives you a mixed wave of feelings. You wonder if any of your friends have suffered at the hands of the Empire, or if they’ve remained hidden. Or perhaps they were all killed during Order 66. You shake your head briefly to clear those thoughts, not wanting to imagine all of the Jedi Order being slaughtered. “Did you ever see it happen?” you decide to ask, but as it leaves your mouth, you realize you don’t know if you want the answer.

“No,” Howzer responds, “but I heard of it. There was one Jedi, a Mirialan woman. They use a recording of her and manipulated her voice to try and drag the Jedi into a trap.”

“Luminara,” you whisper, fist clenching at the thought of her being used in such a way. “I suppose I would be used in the same way if I were captured.”

“Yes, you probably would,” Howzer agrees, “but I don’t want to test that theory out.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll make sure I keep safe,” you promise him. 

He finally turns to look at you, and there’s a certain sadness in his eyes. It’s as though he wants to believe your words, but he knows he can’t. “You shouldn’t make promises that are out of your control,” he says quietly, “it’ll only make things hurt more in the end.”

“Right,” you reply, looking away, “I’ve already made too many of those anyhow. All of them were broken.” Another quiet minute passes before you speak again, and you still haven’t turned back to Howzer when the words come from you. “It’s getting late, we should get some rest.”

“Right,” he says, hesitating before standing up. “Well, goodnight, then,” he says.

“Goodnight, Howzer,” you reply, finally turning to him, “rest well.”

“Are you sure there’s something up here?” Howzer calls from behind you. You snap your head back and hold your finger to your lips, signaling him to be more quiet. Climbing up the side of a canyon is no place to be yelling, especially when your voice is easily recognizable as a clone trooper’s.

“No, I’m not sure. That’s why we’re climbing up to check it out,” you say after you help him up to your level. “We’re almost there, anyway. No sense in turning back now.” It’s only a day after your Imperial base scare, but you want to explore this place sooner rather than later. And there’s no better time to do it than when you don’t have any specific activities like going to the market or spying planned out.

“I guess you’re right,” he agrees with a sigh. “At least the path is easy from here.” You nod and start heading up a path along the side of the cliff. It’s almost as though this had been a former path taken by people before with how well it’s carved out and flattened down. Of course, it’s been worn away by the weather, but the remnants are still obvious. It’s exactly what you had hoped for. “Well I guess it’s a good thing that neither of us are afraid of heights,” Howzer jokes, which makes you freeze in your movements.

“Yeah, about that,” you reply, swallowing hard. “Let’s just focus on reaching the top, and not falling to the bottom.” A couple minutes later, you finally reach the top, and when you look around, your heart skips a beat. An old village long abandoned stands in a patch of trees, and you can’t help but wonder how long ago the people fled. 

“Looks like you were right,” Howzer chuckles, “this was a village before.”

“I’d read about it in one of the old books at the Temple,” you explain as you walk down the main path, “apparently this is where the most force-sensitive Twi’leks lived, before the time of the Jedi Order.”

“It doesn’t look that old,” he comments, peering inside one of the houses.

“It was still used for a while, mostly as a place for the most traditional of families to inhabit. They also happened to still be the most force-sensi—be careful!”

As soon as the words leave your mouth, a piece of the house that Howzer is currently exploring breaks loose and falls onto his head. You stifle a laugh as he wipes the dirt from his hair, glaring at you playfully in the process. “Could’ve used the force to protect me from that.”

“Watching it was way more entertaining,” you giggle back. “Now, come on. I want to see if the fountain is still here.”

“Fountain?”

“Yes, it’s a mythical fountain, said to be a replica of one on Dohbar. Or, I guess it would be the other way around, that Dohbar’s is a replica of this one.”

“Stolen traditions?”

“No, just inspiration. We incorporated our own traditions into ours. Or, well, I guess the Dohbarians did,” you clarify.

“Are you not Dohbarian?” he asks, his head slightly tilting in question.

“No, not by blood. I was adopted by king and queen Monako. My real father was from Coruscant and my real mother was from Serenno.”

“Ah, I see,” Howzer replies. “All I know about myself is that Jango was from Mandalore, and I was created on Kamino.”

“I’m sorry you had to grow up the way you did. Actually, I’m sorry about all that you’ve lived through. It’s not fair,” you say, “everyone should get to choose their own life.”

“Well, if it weren’t for this war, I wouldn’t have been created,” he shrugs. “Or if I still was, then who knows what I would have been used for.”

“You shouldn’t have to be used at all,” you counter.

“Well, unfortunately, it’s just how things have gone,” he says, “but it’s alright now. I’m free, sort of. As soon as we get off this planet, we’ll be able to do whatever we want.”

You purse your lips and nod, turning away so that he doesn’t see your conflicted expression. It isn’t exactly true that you’ll get to do whatever you want. You’ll both still be wanted by the Empire, and both will still have to keep your identities hidden. There isn’t much that you’ll actually be able to do without fear of being captured and taken to the Imperials. 

“I think I found the fountain,” Howzer calls, pulling you from your thoughts. You hadn’t realized you’d been just standing there, trapped in your endless cycle of thoughts and fears. You turn to see him at the end of the path, and you hurry to catch up. When you do, he directs you to follow as he turns and starts walking out of the trees. As soon as you break out of the cover, Howzer steps to the side to allow you to walk next to him. Your breath catches in your throat as you take in the sight before you.

Crystal blue water flows out of the top of a beautiful fountain, with intricate designs carved all around. As you step closer, you recognize some of the symbols and patterns as relating to the force. Both the light side and the dark side are depicted, and even the unclear line of those in between. 

On another side, Twi’lek traditional art is pictured, and you let your eyes take it in slowly. While you don’t understand what it is, or the message it holds, you can feel a deep appreciation and respect for it. A pang hits your heart as you know Ahnimaka never got to experience her Twi’lek culture, and here you are, seeing one of the most sacred sites.

“This is amazing,” Howzer says, breaking the silence. You nod in agreement, reaching a hand out to touch the water. You shiver at the coldness of it, but feel a jolt of electricity as well.

“It’s almost as though this water has the force flowing through it,” you think aloud, “I wonder…”

You sense it before it happens, and act on instinct when it does. The ground starts to give away, and you jump back when it does. Howzer, however, doesn’t move like you do, and the rocks slipping away under his feet drag him down with them.

“Howzer!” you yell, realizing that he isn’t right next to you. You move to step back, but the ground nearly takes you down as well. “Don’t struggle, you’ll fall faster!” Howzer doesn’t reply, but he does as you say. The fear in his eyes tells you that you need to think fast. His body isn’t keeping still enough for you to grab with the force, and the rocks are also interfering with your ability. Panic begins to set in, and with each second you waste not acting, Howzer slips closer and closer to the edge. 

“I don’t mean to rush you, y/n, but there’s not much time left!”

You freeze then, looking directly at him before speaking. “Do you trust me?”

“Yes, I trust you,” he confirms, meeting your eyes.

“Then I have to let you fall.” Shock and fear fill his expression while yours remains set. You understand how it sounds, but it’s the only thing you can think of. “Do you trust me?”

Howzer waits a moment, trying to grip onto the ground with a hand before the rocks slip away again. “Yes, I trust you,” he repeats. “I trust you, y/n.”

“Okay,” you reply, closing your eyes and taking a solid step forward. When you open them, Howzer is at the very edge, and you can’t ignore the feeling that overwhelms you when you watch his fingers slip away.

But it doesn’t matter, because you’re reaching out as soon as it happens. With your solid balance and his clear fall path, you’re able to grab onto him with the force. Both of your arms are extended as you push yourself to securely hold onto him, lifting him back up slowly before taking a few steps back so he has solid ground to land on. When you open your eyes, his are waiting for you to meet them. The intensity of his gaze shocks you, and you lose focus, practically letting him fall into your arms. 

“S-sorry,” you mumble, scrambling to get back to your senses and step back from him. The feeling of him holding onto your hands suddenly makes itself known, and you both look down before you look away. You gently attempt to tug them from his grip, but his hands and eyes stay locked on yours.

Your breathing seems to hitch when you see him take a few steps closer out of the corner of your eye, and then you feel a hand let go of yours, only to gently cup your cheek. Heat rushes to your face at the feeling, and despite what you had told yourself weeks ago, you can’t ignore this feeling between the two of you.

“Your hands are soft,” Howzer says, still looking at the one he has in his hold. His thumb runs over it, fingers interlaced with yours. His other thumb traces your cheek, causing you to meet his gaze, although, as he speaks, his eyes flicker to briefly look a bit lower. “I wonder how soft your lips are,” he mumbles, and you instinctively dart your tongue out to wet them, the feeling of their dryness suddenly obvious to you. His eyes meet yours again, and you can read the silent question in them. You take a slight step forward, your own hand reaching up to his cheek, before you let your eyes fall shut as you lean forward.

Despite the two of you having been out in the desert for almost a month, if not longer by now, Howzer’s lips are surprisingly soft. Even his hand that holds your cheek doesn’t seem to be affected by the harsh conditions. Perhaps it’s due to the pond and being able to bathe, or maybe it’s something else. But all you know is that the feeling of his lips against yours, his body pressing into you, it feels natural. It feels heavenly. It feels right.

When you break away, your face feels even warmer than before. You can tell the moment had the same effect on Howzer, as he looks away shyly and clears his throat. “I, uh…I’m sorry about-”

“Don’t be,” you cut him off, “it’s okay. I-uh…also wanted…yeah.”

You look down as he scratches the back of his neck with an awkward chuckle. “Sorry about almost dying.”

“It’s okay, it’s not your fault. Sorry for almost letting you fall.”

“It’s okay, the force is weird,” he chuckles. An almost unbearable moment of silence passes between the two of you, and you decide to end it by clearing your throat and stepping towards him again. His eyes widen as his cheeks warm again, and you bite your lip nervously before closing your eyes and leaning in again. His hands find your waist as yours wrap around his neck, and the awkwardness falls away this time. You move in sync with each other, hands gently roaming as you take a step back, and another, until you hit the fountain.

“We should…get going,” you say, catching your breath as you pull apart from him.

“Right, yeah,” he agrees before glancing towards the village. “Or we could stay here overnight.”

“We don’t have any food with us,” you sigh, “otherwise I’d say sure.”

“Do you think there could be some around?”

“Nothing edible unless it’s from plants,” you say. “We can look around, but no guarantees.”

“Alright,” he says cheerfully, leaning in to give you a quick peck before his face erupts in heat again. “S-sorry. I don’t uh…know why I did that…”

“It’s okay,” you reply, giggling slightly, “I didn’t mind.” Howzer just gives you a shy grin before holding out his hand, and you gently place yours in it before the two of you begin to head back to search the village for food.

Maybe you were wrong, maybe there is time for falling in love.

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[the-bejeesus]

Another One Piece Birthday that Somehow Reveals a Lot of Lore

      So about a year ago I discussed how the Vivre Card Databooks use snow men’s birthdays to prove that a pre-timeskip arc occurred specifically at a certain date, allowing us to estimate when every pre-timeskip arc took place. However, because of the margin of error in the estimations, along with the vagueness of a “two year timeskip”, it was too difficult to pinpoint dates on any post-timeskip arcs.

      Well, not anymore. You see, for awhile now we’ve known that the Straw Hat Pirates’ birthday is June 13th, but we had no clue what that meant. Well, somebody translated the page for me, and it represents the day the Straw Hats reunited on Sabaody, making the Return to Sabaody arc take place June 13th, 1524. So now all we have to is take note of the passage of time to further estimate arc dates.

Our first immediate hurdle is the Straw Hats all losing consciousness. However, it can be assumed that they didn’t pass out for an entire day.

Despite Sanji passing out from blood loss, there’s no indication that a day has passed.

Despite Fishman Island having its own underwater light source, it appears that night and day still pass. Perhaps the tree is using light from the sun, so it can’t light up the water unless the sun’s out. Anyways, I’m going to count this as one day.

Arriving on Punk Hazard, there’s a huge storm, so it’s hard to tell if it’s day or night. But I would assume it’s the morning of June 14.

Again, there’s some evil knockout gas trying to get in our way, but because not much time seems to pass in Luffy’s group between Nami’s group passing out and waking up, I wouldn’t assume much time has passed. Probably not even an hour.

But that’s not all, Luffy and co are defeated by Caesar and once again left unconscious. However, Zoro’s team is left in tact, so it’s shown that not much time passes before they wake up.

Now you would think that the aftermath at least was a long time, right? After all, Mocha took some powerful drugs and needed recovery. But actually it would appear Law’s treatment was radically successful. The Straw Hats are having a huge banquet at the beginning of the aftermath, and people are still eating just when they’re about to leave.

When they set out, that’s when they finally go to sleep, making Punk Hazard June 14th and just a little bit of June 15th.

While you may have heard the phrase “Dressrosa is 100 chapters but somehow it all covers the course of one day”, and while that’s partially true, it’s ignoring the aftermath of the Dressrosa arc.

For one, night is shown to pass, but on top of that, it’s noted that the Straw Hats have stayed for 3 days since Doffy’s defeat, making it June 18th.

Zou begins on the same day,

Only for a week’s worth of sailing to pass later, making it June 25th.

“Now hold on, a week is vague. It could be exactly 7 days, or it could be 10, or 5!” True, but the dates add up when Robin says “can you tell us everything about the last 11 days from the start?” If it’s June 25th, the last 11 days have been June 15th through June 25th.

As Nami and co go on describing what’s been happening, night passes. This is the only time they can meet Master Cat Viper, as he and Duke Dogstorm have alternating shifts, making it June 26th.

Despite treating Zunesha’s injuries, no passage of time is really indicated, so when Luffy’s group leaves, it can be assumed to still be June 26th.

Now this is where it gets confusing. The Straw Hats note it’ll take multiple days to get to Whole Cake Island.

Then we’re told that it’s still just the first day since they’ve set off, though.

Then it cuts to Sanji and it’s several days later. What do you mean several?

Then when it comes back to the Straw Hats, it’s a few days later. A few??? Is that compounded by Sanji’s “several days later” or seperate?

So now we’re in Totto Land. I would assume it’s once again a week later, making it July 3rd.

Pudding sets up a reindez-vous for tomorrow, on July 4.

We do indeed end up seeing it takes a whole day to actually get to Whole Cake Island.

After the battle with Sanji, night falls. If you’re thinking “hey it’s just a storm” this is proven wrong by Big Mom going to sleep with Brook. The next day is July 5th.

After the wedding, the pursuit of the Straw Hats is shown to go all night long. making it July 6th.

It’s extremely hard to pinpoint when the Reverie happened because the Straw Hats are barely in it, so I’m just gonna say it’s July 6th.

Going into Wano there’s already some problems. For one, there’s no mention of how long it took to get there. And on top of that, they get shipwrecked and pass out. I think it’s safe to assume that it at least took a day to get there, considering how far behind their trail Big Mom ends up being. So it’d be July 7.

Then Kin’emon goes on to say that the Night of the Fire Festival, when they will raid Onigashima, is in exactly two weeks. So the Night of the Fire Festival would be July 21.

And sure enough those two weeks pass exactly as planned.

That is essentially the most info I could find. It’s rather unfortunate that guesswork had to be laid out once we got into Whole Cake Island, but I feel like it’s still pretty accurate.

So, combining what we’ve just estimated with the list of pre-timeskip dates I determined in a previous post, here’s the unofficial complete One Piece story arc timeline:

Pre-timeskip:

East Blue Saga -January 25th, 1522 — February 17th, 1522-

Romance Dawn -January 25th, 1522 — January 26th, 1522-

Orange Town -January 29th, 1522-

Syrup Village -January 30th, 1522 — February 2nd, 1522-

Baratie -February 5th, 1522 — February 10th, 1522-

Arlong Park -February 12th, 1522 — February 15th, 1522-

Loguetown -February 17th, 1522-

Alabasta Saga -February 18th, 1522 — March 8th, 1522-

Reverse Mountain -February 18th, 1522-

Whiskey Peak -February 18th, 1522-

Little Garden -February 21st, 1522-

Drum Island -February 24th, 1522-

Alabasta -March 1st, 1522 — March 8th, 1522-

Sky Island Saga -March 11th, 1522 — March 14th, 1522-

Jaya -March 11th, 1522-

Skypiea -March 12th, 1522 — March 14th, 1522-

Water 7 Saga -March 15th, 1522 — March 30th, 1522-

Long Ring Long Land -March 15th, 1522-

Water 7 -March 22nd, 1522 — March 23rd, 1522-

Enies Lobby -March 24th, 1522-

Post-Enies Lobby -March 27th, 1522 — March 30th, 1522-

Thriller Bark Saga -April 2nd, 1522 — April 5th, 1522-

Thriller Bark -April 2nd, 1522 — April 5th, 1522-

Summit War Saga -April 9th, 1522 — May 5th, 1522-

Sabaody Archipelago -April 9th, 1522-

Amazon Lily -April 11th, 1522-

Impel Down -April 15th, 1522 — April 16th, 1522-

Marineford -April 17th, 1522-

Post-War -May 1st, 1522 — May 5th, 1522-

Post-timeskip:

Fishman Island Saga -June 13th, 1524 — June 14th, 1524-

Return to Sabaody -June 13th, 1524-

Fishman Island -June 13th, 1524 — June 14th, 1524-

Dressrosa Saga -June 14th, 1524 — June 18th, 1524-

Punk Hazard -June 14th, 1524 — June 15th, 1524-

Dressrosa -June 15th, 1524 — June 18th, 1524-

Yonko Saga -June 18th, 1524 — July 21st, 1524 (continuing)-

Zou -June 18th, 1524 — June 26th, 1524-

Whole Cake Island -June 26th, 1524 — July 6th, 1524-

Reverie -July 6th, 1524-

Wano-kuni -July 6th, 1524 — July 21st, 1524 (continuing)-

What I find most interesting about these dates is that, a year ago I concluded that the pre-timeskip ended on May 5th, so if the Straw Hats were to wait exactly two years to get back together, June 13th, is not actually that far off. If it was like April or September that Return to Sabaody was supposed to happen, I’d be in a bit of trouble. I also find it interesting that everything from Return to Sabaody to most of Dressrosa was three days, and then over a month has gone by since then, almost entirely from traveling, sleeping, and waiting for the Fire Festival to come around.

[michelles-garden-of-evil]

Episode 25 Review: The No-No Generation

{ YouTube: 1 | 2 }

{ Full Synopses/Recaps: Debby Graham | Bryan Gruszka }

{ Screencaps }

Welcome back to my Garden of Evil, where I analyze and snark on Strange Paradise for fun and...well, just fun, really. This week, we will conclude our deep dive into Week 5 with a review of Friday’s episode, in which THE DEVIL JACQUES ELOI DES MONDES continues his seduction of Elizabeth Marshall while inside the body of Jean Paul Desmond.

Night on Maljardin. As Jean Paul drinks in the Great Hall and lightning flashes outside, Raxl draws tarot cards in the Not-So-Hidden Temple of the Serpent.

Here are the cards that she pulls, flipped upside-down to show them from her perspective:

We know from previous episodes that the Knight of Coins/Pentacles is Dan and the Queen of Cups represents one of the women on Maljardin (Matt believes it to be Holly, but he could be wrong). We have also seen the King of Wands used to represent Jean Paul before, but King of Cups arguably fits him better because his constant wallowing in self-pity is a negative water/cups trait. The Queen of Wands represents a woman who plays a supporting, managerial role (sounds like Alison). The Page of Coins is a young person who is observing and learning how to make it in the world (could be Tim or Holly).

The rest probably don't represent specific characters, but instead relate to the situation. The Justice card means exactly what its name implies. Ten of Wands "represents an all-out effort, an obsessive commitment to a task which demands everything you've got.” The Seven of Wands normally refers to a situation where confrontation and daring are necessary, but it is reversed here, suggesting failure, defeat, and even scandal; this seems to imply that Jean Paul will be defeated and/or that his activities on Maljardin will cause the scandal that he fears. The Eight of Coins is about workaholism and may have to do with anyone currently working on Maljardin (Raxl, Quito, Alison, Tim, or Matt).

The Five of Cups is an interesting card: it might refer to the impending losses on Maljardin or to any variety of negative emotions, but it is also associated with "Inheritance, suggesting the cross-generational legacy of such tragedies." This reminds me of the parallels between the events so far and what we know of the Maljardin of the 17th century: the deaths of Jean Paul's and Jacques' wives, the seduction of their wives' sisters, the priestess resembling Elizabeth who sacrifices Holly in her dream. In early Maljardin and in the Lost Episodes, Ian Martin consistently drew parallels between the events of 1689 and 1969, so the intended meaning of "cross-generational legacy" seems highly likely.

Also, for those of you wondering, Vangie’s tarot cards in the next scene appear to be the same, just arranged in a different spread. I say “appear” because it’s hard to tell with the lighting and video quality if they are the same cards, although logically they should be.

"If my father's gift is strong in me and if the Great Serpent so wills it," she prays, "may I be lifted to the ancient temple to help in the fight against evil." She lies down in her bed to attempt to teleport herself there and we cut back to the Great Hall.

In the Great Hall, Jean Paul argues with Jacques. Their dialogue somehow sounds even more forced than Jacques’ line about the time clock two episodes ago:

Jacques: "You're very quiet tonight, but not Mother Nature. I wonder what's disturbing her so?" Jean Paul: "Maybe you are. Maybe she's declaring war on all demons." Jacques: "Wooing and warring, a family heritage." [An odd thing to say in this context.] Jean Paul: "I could do without the family heritages and ancestors like you!" [And an equally odd response.] Jacques: "Do without me and you may be doing without yourself. Who knows? You and I could well be one and the same." Jean Paul: "I am NOT a devil!"

Jacques: "Self-declaration, self-incrimination--and don't drink so much. It dulls the senses."

Backacting with the portrait again, I see.

So we get another hint that Jean Paul and Jacques may be the same man, with a very forced-sounding exchange leading up to it that Martin definitely could have written better. Jean Paul gets ready to throw his glass at the portrait (as one does), but can’t because Quito enters with some ice for the next six gin and tonics that he probably originally planned on downing that night.

*Jacques voice* Jean Paul Desmond, has no one ever taught you that people in stone houses shouldn't throw glass? Tsk, tsk…

And now that plan is ruined, too, because Holly comes down the steps and complains to him that she can’t sleep because she keeps having nightmares. (She doesn’t say what about, so I’m going to assume they have to do with either her father or Tarasca again.) Jean Paul offers her some sherry “to sleep and not to dream,” and she responds that the line was one of her father’s favorites from Shakespeare. No, Holly. It’s “to sleep, perchance to dream” not “to sleep and not to dream,” but you were close.

Jean Paul reveals that he, too, couldn’t sleep because of nightmares. “I guess even possessions don’t make a man sleep easy,” Holly replies and, without warning, the portrait disappears and Jacques enters the chat:

Look! The crew actually remembered to remove the portrait this time!

He’s giving her the poison Jean Paul took from the lab!

Holly tells him about how her mother wants to steal her inheritance, and how she intends on taking as much as she can from her in return. (Does that mean you want Jean Paul, too, Holly? Never mind, of course you do.)

Would that be with a W or with a B?

I suspect that Holly wouldn’t know any different.

Meanwhile, on the stairs above, Elizabeth silently observes. But she doesn’t just observe. She observes while wearing a fur-trimmed velvet nightgown and striking a dramatic evil diva pose. As one does.

Wah-wah-WAH-wah-wah...*fade to black*

After the commercial break, Elizabeth overhears Jacques telling Holly that she may learn to love her, because “one who hates can also love.” (Take it from Jacques Eloi des Mondes, murderer and lover extraordinaire.)

“I'm sure my daughter will make an army of fortune-hunters very happy when she does learn,” she, a fortune-hunter herself, interjects. Looking thrilled to see the lovely Tarasca, Jacques welcomes her and offers her a drink:

Jacques: “Some cyanide, perhaps, fresh from the lab?”

Just kidding. It isn’t cyanide; Mrs. Marshall is too much fun for Jacques to kill off, especially this early on. Holly leaves to drink alone in her room and Jacques and Elizabeth get ready to drink to the fact that they’re no longer children, when Holly freaks out over Quito. It turns out he was trying to guard her from the Devil, which amuses dear Jacquet immensely.

You’re so vain, you probably make toasts about you.

After Holly returns to her room, Elizabeth laments the woman “child” Holly become after the death of her father. “Ever since her father died, virtually overnight, she changed from a sweet, shy child into an impossible shrew,” she sneers. “We were really a very happy family before.”

“Holly told me that you did lots of things together, that you traveled a great deal,” says Jacques.

“Yes, of course.” she responds, “Even then, there were signs. The winter before last, she refused to go on vacation with us, wanted to spend Christmas in the cold snow instead of the warm sand. So we went on without her, but, of course, she ruined the trip for us.”

Holly must have had a good reason to stay home in the dreary winter weather rather than go on vacation with her parents; I say that because I, too, am from the north and I, personally, would kill to spend Christmas somewhere warm or at least not snowy. Either that, or Holly is a romantic, holding a sentimentalized view of white Christmases with treetops glistening and children listening to hear sleigh bells in the snow. If that is the case, then...well...I guess it’s nice that she likes snow, because I sure as hell don’t. But really, I’m sure Holly had a damn good reason to avoid Elizabeth.

This is the perfect time to post some photos of Elizabeth’s incredible nightgown. It’s so luxurious, so decadent, so...her.

“How unfortunate,” Jacques responds insincerely.

“Couldn’t we change the topic of conversation from the No-No Generation? I’m very bored with their beads and bells and songs of love.”

The No-No Generation? Now, there’s a name for the Baby Boomers that I’ve never heard elsewhere. Google, too, seems unfamiliar with it: a search for “no-no generation” (with quotes) mostly turns up chemistry papers about nitric oxide. Subtract these and you get only a few more relevant results, one of which is this meme from June 30 of this year. A search for “‘no-no generation’ boomers” yields this cached page mentioning “a vibrant No-No generation in the wake of the 1968 Paris uprising” but that term appears to mostly refer to French rock musicians of the 1960s and 1970s, judging by this other use of the term on the site and this CD listing on another.[1] Considering the dearth of relevant English-language sources using the phrase and considering that Holly isn’t a musician as far as we know, Martin may have come up with the term on his own.

There’s the question of why Elizabeth calls Holly’s generation the “the No-No Generation.” No rules (which, arguably, better describes Generation X)? No interest in the traditions and codes that her and Jean Paul’s generation follow? (Laslo and Irene in the second Desmond Hall arc criticize the Baby Boomers, especially Susan, for that.) No work and no higher education, like the current use of the term in Spain and Brazil? The fact that Holly just didn’t want to go on vacation with her two years earlier? Or, perhaps, all of the above? I’m going to guess all of the above. All the options fit Holly.

So we have learned that Elizabeth disdains Holly’s generation because of their love songs. Even Jacques is taken aback by this, because it implies that she doesn’t believe in love, but she assures him that it’s different because “you and I are old enough to make our own rules.” He gives her a knowing look--as though he knows exactly how old she really is--and places his beringed hand on her shoulder.

That nightgown looks so soft.

Down in the Not-So-Hidden Temple, we pick up right where we left off with Raxl praying to the Serpent for Vangie’s arrival. Before her eyes, the Conjure Woman Chromakeys into the chamber right on top of the Tarot cards, her arms stretching upward:

Weird.

By some miracle, Vangie climbs off the altar without screwing up Raxl’s Tarot spread. But she’s not pleased about arriving on Maljardin where she predicts that she will die, and so she demands to know why Raxl summoned her there. Um, Vangie, don’t you remember earlier in the episode--perhaps minutes before in show time--when you prayed to the Serpent to transport you there? You’re like someone who passes through the turnstile at a metro station, then changes their mind a second later.

While all this is going on, Jacques gleefully drops hint after hint of his true identity:

I’m not sure how much of this is for the audience’s benefit and how much of it is because Jacques thinks everyone else is dumb.

Tarasca: (thinking) “And my name isn’t Elizabeth Marshall.”

We also get this possible shout-out to Dark Shadows:

Back down in the Not-So-Hidden Temple, Vangie helps Raxl interpret the Tarot cards. “Our spirits will be fused through the Tarot cards and the pentagram,” Vangie says. (What was in that tea/potion that Raxl gave her?) Their spirits fused, they try to make sense of the cards’ message:

Raxl: "Do you see what the cards say?" Vangie: "I see two protectors, Matthew Dawson and Dan Forrest."

I assume that the cards she's referencing are the Fool and the Knight of Pentacles, as in previous episodes.

Raxl: *points to Queen of Cups* "But they are not as strong as this one." Vangie: "Who is she?" Raxl: "I cannot tell. Your powers of the cards are much stronger than mine."

They join hands and concentrate on a flame to determine the identity of the Queen of Cups. And then her image appears:

Raxl: "The witch is not..." Vangie: "Yes! The mother of the blonde child, Elizabeth Marshall! Watch her carefully, Raxl. She’s dangerous."

It's odd that Elizabeth of all people should be represented by the upright Queen of Cups, as the descriptions that I’ve read for the card tell of someone with almost the exact opposite personality. According to Tarot.com, this Queen is "a sensitive, vulnerable, omniscient woman who offers unconditional love. She is supremely empathic -- sometimes to a fault. Her caring nature exposes her to everybody else's emotions and needs." Sounds more like Jean Paul’s and Alison’s descriptions of Erica to me, save for the “omniscient” part (which I don’t think is meant to be taken literally).

What’s ironic is that, if the Queen of Cups were reversed, the card would fit Elizabeth well. This page on The Tarot Guide mentions "insecurity, lack of trust…self-centred…smothering, bitter, vengeful, manipulative, spiteful, [and] disloyal” as the reversed Queen’s characteristics. Now that sounds more like the Elizabeth Marshall I know. I suspect that the Queen of Cups was intended to be reversed and its upright position is a blooper.

In the Great Hall, Elizabeth goes to bed and, after some surprisingly not-silly headache faces, Jacques de-possesses Jean Paul. In truth, I’m a little disappointed that he doesn’t clench his teeth or look like he’s about to vomit this time, because I find Colin Fox’s over-the-top headache faces funny. This time, Jean Paul apparently forced him out of his body himself, although how he accomplished this is not explained.

And what exactly did you do, Jean Paul, to force him back into the frame?

Although I know all episodes of this show were rushed to some extent, this one with its abundance of script continuity errors shows more signs of hasty writing than the others. Ironically, they actually remembered to remove Jacques’ portrait from the frame this time when he possesses Jean Paul, which is shocking. Still, despite the rushed-ness of this one, it has provided me with a lot of interesting material to dissect in my deep dive into the bizarre world of Strange Paradise.

Coming up next: Dan and Alison continue their investigation of Erica’s death and Jacques obsesses over a possibly symbolic fish. Also stay tuned for the Bad Subtitle Special for Week 5 next week.

{ <- Previous: Episode 24   ||   Next: Episode 26 -> }

Notes

[1] In France, the term “Génération non non” more often refers to French Millennials of Middle Eastern and African descent who live in the impoverished suburbs or banlieue of French cities. It was popularized in the 2006 song “La Boulette (Génération nan nan)” by French rapper Diam’s.

[frederator-studios]

Bryan Caselli: The Frederator Interview

Bryan Caselli is a Storyboard Artist, Writer and Renaissance Faire enthusiast. Following tenure on top-notch cartoons including Star vs. the Forces of Evil and Sanjay and Craig, ‘twas our good fortune when he set sail to Costume Quest as co-Executive Producer, with a treasure trove of story skillz in tow. Here, Bryan provides his advice to young artists, fav things about Costume Quest, and remarkably realistic take on a 17th century Swashbuckler and his Mer-Lassy.

When did you know that you wanted a career in animation?

My friends and family were alway super supportive of my drawing when I was little, but I got really focused on art in high school. I had an amazing teacher named Kevin McGovern who encouraged me to apply to the California State Summer School for the Arts. CSSSA was a four week residency arts summer program on CalArts’ campus featuring many different disciplines. I studied in the animation department, and it was like I finally found my people. After those four weeks, I knew I wanted to work in animation, and I wanted to go to school at CalArts. There was no turning back.

(Every day is Halloween for the CQ crew! But this day was actually Halloween.)

Where are you from, and how did you chart your path to CalArts?

I'm originally from Sacramento, California. It's a legitimately sized city, but it still has a small town vibe that's warm and welcoming. I applied to CalArts straight out of high school, but didn't get in on my first try. I actually didn't apply to any other schools. My plan was to just apply again the next year, but my mom secretly applied for me to CSU Sacramento as a somewhat, "What if he doesn't get into CalArts for ten years?" worst case scenario backup plan. After swallowing the tough pill of not getting into my dream school, I took a collection of figure drawing, portrait drawing, painting, and art history classes at both Sac State and Sac City college. I didn't stay long enough to earn a degree. Luckily, I was accepted into CalArts the following year.

How did you decide you wanted to storyboard and write?

I got into animation thinking I wanted to be a character designer. It seemed to be the most glamorous position at the time, but I found out quickly that you have to be an exceptional draftsman to do that job, which I'm not. I fell in love with the story department in my 3rd and 4th years at CalArts. I had some awesome teachers who really set me on the path that I'm on now.

What do you love most about the job?

I can't get enough of stuff like mythic structure, archetypal symbolism, and fable storytelling. I really get excited by just how universal storytelling is. It can connect you with anyone. That's easily my favorite part of my work.

What was your first job in animation or art, and how’d you land it?

I interned on Regular Show. I actually went in to interview for a different show, but on my way out, I ran into Ben Adams, the Regular Show character designer and my former classmate. He told me to blow those other guys off and come work with him. He introduced me to Regular Show's Producer, Janet Dimon, and we really hit it off. She offered me the position soon after that. At the end of my internship, I pitched the storyboards for my student film, Scout Wars. After the pitch, someone from development came up to me and said, "You need to pitch this upstairs." That's how I got my second gig.

The show was never produced, but getting paid to develop my original concept that early in my career really set in stone my desire to run a show of my own some day. I even got to work with our future Costume Quest Art Director, Ricky Cometa, on the development poster.  After that, I did about a year and a half of full-time freelance, which eventually lead me to work with the creators of Sanjay and Craig on some of their punk side projects. I really liked working with those guys, so when they asked me to come on Sanjay, it was an easy choice.

That’s awesome. Was Sanjay the first show you wrote and boarded for? How is it to work on a board driven show?

Yep, Sanjay was the first TV show that I got to write and storyboard on. Both writing and storyboarding is really demanding, but it's also really rewarding. Nick Bachman (Costume Quest's previously interviewed Supervising Producer) was my Storyboard Director on Sanjay, and we really clicked as a team. Sanjay and Craig was a perfect show to be board driven because it was super cartoony and there were very few rules. It was a great opportunity for board teams to have their specific voices heard. When you watch an episode of Sanjay and Craig you can pretty much spot which teams did which episodes from a mile away.

How was writing on Star vs the Forces of Evil - is it board driven too?

Writing on Star was an awesome change of pace coming off of Sanjay. Daron Nefcy was a great leader to work for, and I became really close with my fellow writers. It was board driven, which made the transition from storyboarding to outline writing a lot more of a doable task for me. I was comfortable in that kind of production pipeline and pretty much knew what would be expected of me as a writer. The coolest part about working on Star was that it was a seasonally arcing, somewhat mythic story. It was so cool to get to craft a large story over multiple episodes. I took a lot of lessons learned writing on Star and brought them with me to the writers' room on Costume Quest.

Is it odd being a bit of a ~star~ yourself, considering you have a whole fan page and everything?!

Oh boy, having a fan wiki page is a strange feeling. It's really cool to be apart of a show that has such a passionate fanbase, but honestly I don't want to be a star. Star Butterfly is the star of Star.  

You’re Costume Quest’s co-Executive Producer. What does the job entail? 

Being the co-EP on Costume Quest means I, along with the rest of our leadership team, am responsible to supervise just about every stage of production. From writing to storyboarding, animatics to art, voice acting and voice casting, logo design, score, sound effects, the list goes on and on. I got to script a handful of episodes. Nick and I storyboarded the first episode. Occasionally I do some (very rough) first pass character designs. I also draw story board punch-ups and animation redline revisions on the episodes I direct. I direct the first story of each of Costume Quest's two part episodes, and Nick directs the second story. Beyond that I mainly keep my eye on the larger narrative of the show, making sure everything is tonally consistent and the story threads line up. If every person that works on this show is making one tree, I try to make sure the forest is working as a whole. I do my best not to force any artist to execute their assignments exactly as I would have, but instead, encourage them to showcase their personal artistic voices.

How have you enjoyed working on Costume Quest, and what do you like most about the show?

Working on Costume Quest has been my favorite gig yet. I am really grateful to Will (McRobb), Kevin (Kolde), and Eric (Homan) for bringing me onboard. I'm super proud of how much the show grows across the first season. The scale, the emotional stakes, and the world building just get bigger and bigger with every episode. Beyond that, having the chance to lead a team has been incredibly rewarding. Our whole crew is so talented, and they are all so supportive of the show. It has really meant a lot to me to learn that these people, who I respect tremendously, are happy to come in to work every day and are proud to help tell this story. I can't overstate how good it feels to know I have a creatively and professionally satisfied crew.

Do you have a favorite character on CQ?

I love all four of the main kids, but my favorite character really is Norm. I always say that he's a cross between Fred Flintstone and Santa Clause. He's such an emotionally vulnerable character, and he's got some great reveals attached to his backstory. Fred Tatasciore also does some incredible voice acting as Norm, so if this show only gets one award ever, it should go to Fred's performance.

Since developing Scout Wars, have you gone out pitching other original ideas?

I’ve pitched Scout Wars and a handful of other show ideas around to the big studios, but when Costume Quest came about, I knew it was the perfect opportunity to learn everything I needed to about the responsibilities of a show runner—without the added emotional pressure of having the show be about my childhood, or my relationship with my father, or whatever. I have a handful of ideas in my back pocket that I'm eager to start pitching again whenever Costume Quest comes to a close.

What are your favorite cartoons?

Not including the shows I've worked on: original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Batman the Animated Series, Justice League/Justice League Unlimited, Doug, Hey Arnold!, SpongeBob, Simpsons, Bob's Burgers, Archer, Flintstones, the Peanuts specials, and the original Power Rangers gets a non-cartoon honorable mention because the the influence that show had on me and Costume Quest is pretty undeniable.

What is your advice to people who want to write and/or storyboard for animation? 

Study the craft as hard as you can. It's not about networking, or Internet likes, or whatever. If you get as good as you possibly can at the craft, you'll be golden. Take any job that will hire you. Once you get any position anywhere, if you show everyone you work with just how dedicated you are, people will take notice, and they'll want to help you.

What do you enjoy doing outside of work?

I really love hosting backyard BBQ's and parties at my place. My friends tease me that I'd rather they come to me than I go anywhere else pretty much 100% of the time. You can find me most Sunday mornings at any of the LA flea markets with my girlfriend, Madison, looking for more knick knacks to put up in our place. Also, I take my Renaissance Faire costuming pretty seriously. Yearly upgrades are planned months in advance. My mom always sewed my Halloween costumes growing up, so costumes somehow became a thing I really like to do. I guess it's fitting that Costume Quest came my way.

Have anything to say to future fans of Costume Quest?

Watch it again! We did our best to set up, pay off, and foreshadow as much as possible in the season so it would be fun to rewatch. There are a lot of little easter eggs in there. I hope fans enjoy it. ☆

No doubt, they will. Thank you for the interview Bryan, and for your fantastic work on Costume Quest!  Follow Bryan on Instagram.

- Cooper ☆

[clegacylabs]

A Friendship isn’t So Petty

(Post X3 (Longish Drabble))

It was late into the night as two women walked on the paths next to the busy roads of the inner city. The world was high off the success of repelling once more a major Maverick threat. The months of fighting were long, multiple engagements were made globally, but in the end, the Hunters prevailed. Because of that, tonight was a night for celebration, even if an official end just meant more work of a different kind. It was only at the badgering of her best friend and X’s, her commander, insistence, that Inessa pried herself away from the things still left to do.

Hours of bar hopping later thanks to a human with an iron liver, there the pair were. Erika could barely walk straight anymore, so the reploid woman ended up having to carry the blitzed human on her back. The life of the city thrummed around them with speeding cars, flashing signs, and the occasional obnoxious holo-ad.

“Wooo yeah!! Hahaha! Urp!! Fffffff-” The red-head swayed on her friend’s back as she tried to cheer with both her arms. Erika immediately regretted that. Her stomach was poised to exit her mouth and the world spun dangerously behind her eyes. She fell forward, letting her chin rest on Inessa’s shoulder, arms coming wrap themselves around the reploid. Her friend’s low laugh rumbled through her.

“You’re lucky I don’t like to drink nearly as much as you do,” said Inessa. Erika barked a laugh.

“Man, that’d be a helluva sight. Pfftt. Human scientist and 17th’s second-in-command just stummblin’ around drunk. Can’t even make it home!” she exclaimed, words slurring some on her tongue.

“Mortifying.”

“Hilarious!” the human insisted. They lapsed into a companionable silence. In the quiet between them, the human Russian turned pensive. The glow of celebration lagged behind them as they got closer to the HQ, still undergoing repairs from this past war’s opening act.

“Ya know,” she started. Inessa’s head inclined slightly towards her. “I honestly thought I was gonna die a couple months ago.” Erika felt her friend’s body stiffen slightly, though she walked as if unaffected. “I’m sorry. I wish I could have found you sooner that day.” Ugh, regret, that won’t do. Not where she was trying to take this conversation anyway.

“It’s fine. Ya kinda had your hands full with half the unit turning... Again. Well, last time was more than that, but still. Then the rest of base was another story. Mavericks took advantage of the fact the most of HQ’s best were out on a big campaign, leavin’ secondaries ta hold down the fort ‘fore the cavalry showed up.”

“Where are you going with this, Erika?” Ah, of course. Always wanting to get to the heart of the matter. No point in beating around the bush now. Better to say, before she figures it out instead. Harder to steer the conversation that way. Plus, she’s got liquid courage in her, too, to keep her from chickening out again.

“Need ta ‘pologize to ya.” Erika was met with silence. She took that as her cue to continue. “Startin’ to think I’m just bad luck.” The human laughed, low, mirthless, hollow. Her words were considerably more sober when she stopped.

"When my husband died, we hadn’t been married long, but we’d known each other for so much time. I was already pregnant with Andrei when we filed the papers. Two short years, then a fire took him. It hurt, but I still had my boy. It was alright. I met you, worked in your lab, became friends with you and the others but...” The implication hung between them. The day of the attack and attempted kidnapping. Neither of them had seen a corpse in person before, much less the number and having known each personally...

Another bitter laugh. “And then he was gone.”

“Erika-” Inessa started, understanding her friend was heading in a dark direction.

“And then, because you’re you, and your stupid sense of duty, you follow me on my damn vendetta fueled trip. And what happens? We get split up. And you’re out there killing yourself fighting the monsters. The friends we made up until the first war die, turned traitor and die, or just fucking run off like the self-hating cowards they are!” Her voice cracks and she’s feeling heat in her face and ears.

“Eri-” The voice came at a higher pitch than her usual, sounding more like Dimitra.

“No.” She hisses, cutting the reploid off again. Erika’s hands clenched together in a white knuckled grip. “No, I watch us change into people so different from who we were and I can’t believe it took until watching Doppler’s sleeper agents getting literally frozen to the floor of R&D and cut down by you, in my face no less, to realize that. To realize I let my best friend chase after me while I turn into Captain Ahab, letting every Maverick be my Moby Dick.” The woman could barely catch her breath, vision swimming from her physically and emotionally compromised state. Inessa halts and Erika realizes distantly that they were on a park trail.

More silence. Erika wished that her friend would just put her down or something, because it’d be nice to read her face... As readable as it can be these days. An aggrieved sigh broke the quiet.

“Erika... Vengeance or not, I would have had to fight. I chose what would have made me happier.”

“... What?” Another sigh. Careful not disorient the human, Inessa walked towards a bench and set her down. The reploid slumped onto the wood next to her. Her face was angled low, bangs brushing past her eyelashes, sight, distant.

“I’m a first-gen Reploid, Erika. Everything about me was experimental. Including the lab. From the recovered footage of us fending for ourselves until the Hunters came, the Russian government would have obligated me to be drafted, or else. We were a brand new race plopped onto the world literally overnight.” Inessa turned to meet Erika’s eyes. “The science world would prefer breakthroughs in aquatic science and pollution control, but the powers that be want anything to stay as the powers that be.” She closed her eyes, shoulders drooping slightly.

“The Mavericks, especially ideological ones, weren’t completely wrong... but the ends don’t justify the means.” Erika feel could her mouth dangling open as Inessa turned to her again. “Following you gave me a choice I didn’t realize I could make. Don’t apologize, not when I feel grateful to you.” She sat up to her full height, meeting Erika eyes with a warm intensity. They stayed like that in the stillness of the park.

... ... ... ... ...

The human felt something bubble in her chest. Her shoulders shook and she started to wheeze. Before she knew it, Erika was cackling. The feeling one part hysteria, one part disbelief, one part relief.

“What the hell, all that and you go and say that of all things?” Wetness beaded at the corner of her eyes. Inessa shrugged, the lines of her face relaxing as the tension subtly left her.

“I’m not accepting an apology that’s pointless. There’s nothing to forgive. You and I’s perceptions are out of sync.” Erika scowled at her.

“Well then, I’m not accepting your gratitude then!” The human’s middle name was spite, in her mind at least.

“Okay”

“’Okay’?!”

“Yes.”

“That’s all you have to say?!”

“Yes.”

“Oh come on!” She threw her hands up. Inessa arced an eyebrow. “Is there a problem?” Erika glared before she cooled slightly. “No, I guess not, I just don’t like how you’re taking this so easily.” she grumbled. A small smile inched onto Inessa’s face.

“I’m rejecting your apology because I see it as pointless. You may have had influence, but you don’t control my actions. Even if you don’t accept my gratitude, that’s fine. I... just wanted you to know how I felt. Nothing more.” Finally, Erika slumped in her seat. “Are you even real?”

“Isn’t it too late to be discussing Plato’s “Cave” Allegory?”

“Ugh! Take us home! I’m so done with you!” The cat-like smile on the reploid’s face was all there was to say about that exchange. With that, they were back in the same position they started after they left the last bar. Calmer now, the sounds of running water from the creek and the rhythmic footsteps of her friend started to lull Erika to sleep. She let the world pass them by as her eye-lids grew heavy.

“Neshka?”

“Mnn?”

“Thanks for everything.”

“Hmn.” Erika felt the smile in the hum of acknowledgement. Her eyes closed and she knew no more.

[plumedesimili]

Shall we dance?

“So, how do I look?”

If anything, the look on Terra’s face should have been enough of an answer. The young man completely froze, agape, staring at her with big round eyes, his cheeks slowly turning a nice shade of pink. But Aqua was so worried that she didn’t read the signs well, and took that silence for something different.

“I knew it. That’s too much, isn’t it?”

“N-No, it’s just… You are… You look…” Terra was stuttering. And he never stuttered. He cleared his throat, trying to regain some of his dignity. “You look okay. No worries.”

This was clearly not the correct answer, he understood as she frowned. But what word could he use? She was wearing a blue dress that complemented her shapes, and her delicate makeup somehow made her face shine brighter. What word could he use? He no longer feared to lose her in a crowd, because no matter how much people there would be, she would still stand out, a light on her own, and his eyes would find her right away.

“Okay? Thank you Terra. It took me quite a while to achieve this result, so I’m glad I look okay. Coming from you, I’m going to assume it is a compliment.” The tone of her voice made it clear that she really wasn’t taking this as a compliment at all. But he had no way to express how he felt right now.

“Wow, Aqua, you are beautiful!” Oh, right, he could have used these words, he supposed. It was too late now that Ven said them, though. The boy whistled and stared at Aqua with an appreciative smile. “You’re going to steal the show, you know! All men will want a dance with you!”

Terra clenched his fists. He’d like to see that happening. Ven slid a nasty look at him and grinned. “Don’t worry, Terra, you look okay, I’m sure that some old lady will take pity of you and ask for a dance.” He then started pouting. “But why can’t I come with you guys? It’s so unfair, I wanna come and have fun too!”

Aqua giggled and ruffled his hair. “I’m sorry, Ven, but you can’t come just yet. We are not going to that ball to have fun, you know. The Three Good Fairies have asked us to protect Aurora if Maleficent or any other danger showed up. Our outfits are only so we can blend in.” She put a kiss on his cheek. “I promise I’ll save you the last dance. Deal?”

Ven being Ven, he couldn’t pout more than thirty seconds anyway and grinned at them instead. “Deal! Enjoy your evening, then! Aurora will be safe with the two of you, I know it!”

“The Lanes Between have been opened.” Master Eraqus said from the door. “It’s time to go.” He looked at them with pride. “You both look beautiful. This is your first official job, but I do not worry. Have a good time.”

As they both summoned their armours (who, for magical reason, wouldn’t damage their clothes or anything), Terra heard Ventus snicker. “He said she looked okay, I can’t even believe that…”

“Oh, shut up, Ven.” Terra answered before waving at his Master and his friend, finally taking off with Aqua.

“Here you are!” The Good Fairies welcomed them with a bright smile. “We have already set up a magical barrier around the Castle, and we are pretty sure everything will be alright, but your presence is a relief. This is Aurora’s 17th birthday, we can’t let anything happen!”

“Sorry we’re a little late”, Terra apologized, “it took us a bit longer than expected to travel.”

“Terra got lost.” Giggled Aqua.

“I did not! I was just… disorientated for a minute.”

“Don’t you worry, Terra, we both know your sense of orientation is okay anyway.” She repressed a smile but her eyes betrayed her hilarity. The young man sighed.

“So what would you like us to do? Patrol around the castle? Guard the door?”

“Oh, none of that, dear!” Fauna covered her mouth with her hand, as if shocked by his words. “Please just enjoy the party as any guest would. If anything comes up, we know you will react quickly anyway.”

“Fauna is right. Enjoy the music and the buffet, and hope nothing happens!” Nodded Merryweather.

“And you both look so pretty in these clothes, it would be a shame if you didn’t dance. Come on, hop hop, go to the ballroom and enjoy your time!”

The two apprentices looked at each other and laughed. That evening would be enjoyable. Terra offered his arm to Aqua, who took it with a bright smile, and they entered the castle.

There were many people in there already. It was easy to spot the Princess, already dancing with her Prince in the middle of the room. Aqua smiled. Aurora was a very nice person, and Philip was made for her. They both looked so happy together.

“No Maleficent in sight.”, said Terra, scanning the room for a scary lady with horns or a devilish raven. “Look at that buffet, though. Ven would be crazy.”

Aqua giggled. “He really would. We could try to bring him some cake back, what do you think?”

“I think you are trying to steal a Princess, and that’s really bad, Aqua. But that’s also for Ventus’s happiness so I could hardly say no.” They laughed again, thinking of how Ven would react at so much food.

“Hey, Aqua?”

“What is it?”

“Would you like to dance? With me, I mean.”

Aqua smiled, her cheeks slightly blushing. “Thanks for the precision, or I would have run to dance with the first stranger I’d meet.”

“That’s not what I…”

“I’d love to.” He smiled back at her, taking her hand and leading her to the center of the room, joining the other dancers.

Finally, these months of learning waltz paid off, as he didn’t step on her feet once, and neither did she (his left foot still remembered the pain of her heel crushing his toes). After a moment of focusing to find their marks, they had found their pace.

“Aqua, by the way, I’m sorry if I hurt you earlier… I didn’t mean to… You know.”

Aqua chuckled. “It’s okay. Sorry I teased you about that. I know you were trying to be nice.”

Terra sighed, squeezing her hand. “It’s not just that… I wasn’t trying to be nice. You just looked so pretty, I couldn’t find the right words, and I feared that if I stayed silent any longer you would think I really didn’t like it… I do. I really do. You look amazing.”

While her cheeks took a bright shade of pink, her blue eyes started sparkling, another blow to his heart. She really was the prettiest woman he’d ever meet. Then, suddenly, something else appeared into her eyes. Was it… Worry? Sadness? She escaped his gaze, but he had seen it already.

“Hey, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing. Nothing, it’s stupid.”

“Just tell me. I will listen.”

She took a deep breathe in, her hand slightly shaking in his.

“I’ve just realised that once we both are Masters, we eventually will have to find apprentices. We won’t both stay in the Land of Departure. We will live apart. Worlds apart. I can’t imagine a life without you by my side. This would be… So lonely.”

He squeezed her hand, pulling her closer with the hand on her hip.

“Then don’t imagine it. You keep saying it yourself. There is always a way. And there is a way for us not to live apart.”

She looked at him, her eyebrows slightly furrowed as she was processing his words. He smiled softly, gently tucking a wild lock of hair behind her ear.

“I’m asking you to be mine, Aqua. Be mine, and nothing should pull us apart.”

She laughed, putting her forehead against his chest. “You’re stupid.” If his heart started racing at her sudden proximity, he frowned at her words, until she looked at him again with very soft eyes.

“Be yours? I can’t think of a single day of my life when I wasn’t yours, Terra. I’ve always been yours.”

They stopped dancing, and he let go of her hip to place his hand on her cheek, slowly leaning closer until their lips met. He felt her warm fingers on the back of his neck, and when she smiled at him, the whole world seemed to disappear, and it was only the two of them, dancing till the end of the night.

There was no Maleficent to ruin their evening, and when the ball finally ended, it was incredibly late.

“We would like to give you a present before you go.” The Good Fairies caught them just as they were about to summon their armours. “As a thank you gift for your presence.”

“Oh, but we didn’t do anything, really!” Aqua answered, embarrassed, but Flora clicked her tongue.

“You can’t refuse a present, now, can you? We are really grateful that you came all the way to protect Aurora, and you deserve a retribution. No arguing. Ready, ladies?”

The tree of them wiggled their wands for a few seconds, and a flow of light arced from them to the two apprentices.

“It fits perfectly!” cheered Merryweather. “It really does!” agreed Fauna.

Terra and Aqua looked at each other, looking for what could have changed. Until they looked at their hands.

The fairies had given them matching rings. Terra’s was a simple one, with three jewels, a blue one, a red one and a green one embedded in it ; Aqua’s was a little bit more sophisticated, with the same three stones.

“Thank you. Thank you so much. They look beautiful.” And Aqua meant every word of it.

“Oh, don’t mention it. Be careful on your way back!” The three fairies left, and the two young adults exchanged a cheerful look.

“I guess we should go home now.”

“Yeah. You promised Ven a dance. He’ll be crossed if he doesn’t have it.”

They chuckled. “I guess you’re right. I had a wonderful evening, Terra. Thank you.”

He kissed her on the cheek. “Thank you. I love you, Aqua.”

“I love you too.”

They summoned their armours and flew back home. They held each other’s hand the whole flight.

[END]

First post to start the blog \o/ This is Simili-Anonyme’s side blog where some fics will be posted from time to time. I might add some other fics that are already on FFNet or AO3 as well as some new stuff from time to time. Yes I like to say time to time. Since my posting schedule is pretty full on AO3/FFNet I might post some stuff here as well!

Anyway, this fic was inspired by one of @chachacharlieco ‘s streams where she drew Terra and Aqua with royal outfits, aaand suddenly I felt like writing something about these two at a ball. This fic up there is set up in an AU where Xehanort never stepped in, I guess? None of them are Masters yet either.

Man, I’m more nervous than I should be to post it here, why do I feel so vulnerable and embarassed? hides under her blanket 

[mihrunnisasultans]

i know you're not a fan of MC Hurrem but whats your opinion of historical hurrem? i felt season 1, 2 and part of 3 really didn't do her justice

Hello Anon!

Sorry that you waited so long for my response, but I wanted to give you a comprehensive answer and thus it got really long, so most of it is under Read more. And thank you for an interesting question :)

I do prefer historical Hürrem to the MC one, but she’s still not my fave. TBH I don’t have that strong emotions towards historical figures as opposed to fictional characters because we really don’t have any real insight into their everyday life, and historical accounts are always more or less subjective. Hating someone about whom I really don’t have much 100% confirmed information? Unfair and pointless. To quote Galina Yermolenko from the introduction to Roxolana in European Literature, History and Culture:

Although Western historians have been struggling to define Roxolana’s legacy for over four centuries, it is often overlooked that she was largely a creation of the European imagination. Due to the lack of historical records and hard evidence, most of what is known about this woman rests on a handful of secondhand contemporaneous accounts and subsequent reinterpretations and speculations by numerous historians, quasi historians, dramatists, and other men of letters who have shaped the Western discourse on Roxolana.

Thus said, I do understand your reservations about MC early portrayal of her. Portrayal of Hürrem as a ruthless schemer and manipulator is certainly nothing new; MC’s depiction thankfully does not make her some evil walking caricature like the earliest Western works on her (from 16th or 17th century), but she’s a complex character that has her sympathetic moments even in the view of those who generally dislike her, in accordance with later tradition. But since you have no problem with S4 Hürrem, who is even more ruthless than the earlier one, I guess your problem is of a different nature.

Again, the portrayal of Hürrem as a wild, unruly spirit is nothing new in works devoted to her, and while I totally get the problem with “undignified” Hürrem, I kind of appreciate it now? Pretty much all of “big five″ women of Sultanate of Women in MY/K are portayed based on the “slay queen” trope, but I feel that aside from Turhan, they all have their own distinctive features, other than the generic woman who slays them all and loves power? Hürrem‘s character actually develops and she becomes the true majestic sultana later on; it’s again kind of realistic that she’s not one from the start? Her wild and flamboyant image actually serves to show how much she’s of an outsider and differs from other women. Again, she becomes more dignified and majestic as she integrates herself into the world to which she was forcefully introduced. (NGL Turhan made me appreciate earlier character creations more because she’s basically a generic slay kween with little of other characteristics…) MC Hürrem is definitely a good character creation that elicits strong emotional response from the audience, whether positive or negative. I e.g. love to hate her and enjoy rooting against her, others do the opposite, but it’s hard to stay indifferent about her. And as as I sad, she actually develops in the span of 4 seasons.

But then again, I agree it’s sometimes overdone on the show. The earlier seasons do have their tongue-in-cheek moments, and Hürrem‘s sometimes excessive flamboyance is also part of that.

I have more issues with what was not shown about her character in addition to being a ruthless schemer and clever manipulator, as well as her relationship with Süleyman.

From what we know, historical Hürrem took an active interest in state matters that sometimes also wasn’t connected with her intrigues. In the show, even in S4, her occupation with state matters does not go further than what she needs because of self-interest. Most of her non-mercenary actvities are indeed shown in S4 when her participation in foreign relations and diplomatic correspondence are mentioned, but they seem a bit shoerhorned at this point and especially the mention of her diplomatic correspondence just shortly before her death seems more “tell-not-show”?

As for historical Hürrem’s relationship with Süleyman, it is often stressed by historians how he viewed her as his partner and advisor. I understand that they didn’t want to make Hürrem as such from the start because she needed to also learn about her surroundings (and her position and influence on Süleyman did rise after Hafsa’s demise and marriage), but even later in the show we mainly see Süleyman telling her that “it’s not your matter and go to your room” or “do not bother your pretty head with it”. He definitely treats her more as a partner in S4. Same about the constant (and tiring) repeated introductions of new “other women” for Süleyman and then making us watch unnecessarily long arcs of Hürrem hunting down such women. Judging by historical accounts, Süleyman stayed faithful to her, and in the show it seems that early!Hürrem spent her days mainly plotting other women’s demises. I understand giving us an insight into harem struggles when Hürrem did have to fight for her position in Süleyman’s  heart at first, but later? Why, TIMS?

Historical Hürrem is definitely a controversial figure that sparks a lot of different approaches and opinions. Not long ago, I was reading two books with two totally different approaches towards her at the same time, one was André Clot’s biography of Süleyman (Suleiman the Magnificent: The Man, His Life, His Epoch), the other Empress of the East by Leslie Peirce. Clot is highly critical of her and shows signs of the older approaches in historiography concerning Hürrem (Sultanate of Women = ruin of empire), but at the same time sees her side of the argument and is of the opinion that it is Süleyman who is truly to blame for most things (so he breaks here with the presentation of Süleyman as an innocent puppet). [And frankly, Clot is salty about everyone except for Mustafa]. On the other hand, Peirce, in an attempt to debuke the “seductress who brought ruin on the Empire”image, goes from one extreme into another. Example:

A more peaceable system of identifying the next sultan began to emerge from transformations in the practice of succession-by-combat that began with her. Roxelana helped to move the Ottoman empire into modern times, where treaty negotiations became as challenging and significant as victory in battle and domestic well-being occupied as much of the government’s attention as conquest. Bolstered by the reforms she introduced, the Ottoman sultanate would sustain itself for another three and a half centuries

Even ignoring the VERY questionable first statement (struggles to determine Süleyman’s successor that Hurrem did influence were terribly bloody), there were many factors at play that affected Ottoman Empire’s transformation and to reduce the whole complex process to one historical figure’s influence is absurd  and gross oversimplification, just as blaming solely one historical figure for deterioration of the Empire is. BTW, I recommend Günhan Börekçi’s thesis Factions and Favourites at the Court of Sultan Ahmed and his Immediate Predecessors and Baki Tezcan’s Searching for Osman: A Reassessment of the Deposition of the Ottoman Sultan Osman II if you want to read a comprehensive discussion on the whole complex process of Ottoman Empire’s political system becoming more sedentary ;) A bit of digression -  I’m sad to be so critical of Peirce here because I do enjoy and appreciate The Imperial Harem and she is far more objective and balanced in that book. Also, I’m disappointed that such a large portion of Empress is based on imagination rather than a thorough historical analysis of sources.

Another criticisim of Empress of the East that I have was well put into words in the NYT review of the book:

Less convincing are her strained exculpations for Roxelana, insisting that she was not behind various unsavory murders that benefited her. One is left with the impression that Roxelana consistently wielded impressive power, except when things went badly.

Again, in trying to fight with demonisation of someone, do not make that person an angel either. We may not have concrete evidence of Hürrem being involved in e.g. Ibrahim’s or Mustafa’s deaths, but in my opinion “there’s no smoke without fire”. Peirce does mention in The Imperial Harem that Hürrem and Safiye were two sultanas least liked by people and I don’t think the assumption that “people hated women in power” explains it all, since sultanas with even more power, like Turhan or Kösem, were much liked.

Hürrem Sultan was a controversial figure that deserves a nuanced, complex portrayal. While MC portrayal has its flaws with respect to the depicton of a historical figure, at least it does show her as a complex person, with both good and bad traits. And as importantly, it does work within the established narrative. Could it have been done better though? Yes.

On a side note,I’m  actually more salty about how Turhan was portrayed in comparison to her historical persona :/, but that’s a topic for a different discussion.

[confringo-]

2019 Goals Update

Check it out. I’m procrastinating again with another blog. I’m supposed to be editing my novel right now but I’m not because I like to self-sabotage myself by avoiding the work I need to do to avoid feeling the deep sting of failure at my poor writing choices. 

Here we go! 

Health Goals

1. Lose 10 inches from my waistline by the end of the year.

5 inches by June

5 inches by December

I’m not doing too well with this. I’ll tell you more about why that is in a later section, if you get that far. The short of it all is that there were days that were Too Much for me and I just shut down. A suicide prevention workshop that took more out of me than I expected. My sister’s birthday that my mom tried to ruin with her “Family First” bullshit. I lost a little bit off the waistline, true, but I haven’t been consistent. Hopefully, being unemployed for a little while will help me get into the habit of exercise. 

2. Learn to cook 6 vegan meals (not snacks)

One meal every two months, I said. And here I am. Still no progress. I mean, I’ll have all the time in the world for a couple of months so we’ll see what will happen. Mom wants me to go do driving lessons (Hey whaddup I’m Joey I’m 25 and I never learned how to drive) so I’ll be out and about. That’s my one big problem with cooking/baking these days. Going out is such a chore. I don’t want to look at people after dealing with People for a whole work week. 

Now, the excuses will be off the table. Shit. 

3. Clean room while listening to a  new Night Vale episode podcast.

I’ve actually been doing this! It’s not the best system but I have been keeping the clutter from getting too much. I’ve been listening to Hannahlyze This and they’re doing this whole arc of episodes surrounding perfectionism and it’s been very helpful. Anyway, I marie kondo-ed the fuck out of my closet (for the most part) and it’s a lot less crazy in my room. This month has been difficult but I still have a couple of days to do my second round of cleaning. 

Writing Goals

1. Finish HSHL (His Smile, His Laugh) by June 30th, 11:59PM

Listen, I’m more behind than I care to admit but I’m also going at this faster than I expected. It’s weird. Part of me thinks I should’ve been done by this month, another part of me realizes that, all things considered, I’m doing well. I hate to admit that I’ll only be able to finish this novel because I won’t have a job in May or in June. It’s like I can never fully admit to being a Big Boi Writer because I haven’t done what most writers have done: Write a Book While Holding Down a Regular Nine-to-Five. 

But I think I blogged before about using what advantages I have. Right now, it’s Mommy’s Money. No matter what, I’ll be a writer. I write stories, I let people read them. I’m a writer. I have to tell my pride to ease off because my confidence can’t breathe in this kind of environment. 

I’m taking this very seriously. If I don’t have a finished product by June after a literal month of unemployment, I’m going to be disappointed.

2. Submit draft to AT LEAST 25 agents starting July 15th.

3. Submit 3 stories to 10 journals/magazines

Okay for these two, I can’t say much of it because I still have to do the first one, but soon! 

4. Finish “Julian’s Body” by February 28, 11:59PM

5. Finish “Forgive My Weakness” by January 31, 11:59PM

The first goals I did this year. I want to brush them off as easy and I don’t want to talk about how difficult it was to finish them both before my deadlines. But we’re not doing that. I’m going to allow myself to be proud of what I accomplished with those fics. I wrote them, I started my novel, I went to work. I did that. I’m capable and I shouldn’t take that away from myself. 

6. Read at least one book/full lit mag/journal per month.

I almost jerked it this month because I thought I could read the Dungeon Master’s Guide from cover to cover. I realized quite early that it read like a textbook. I hate textbooks. Still, I powered through and took what I could get. I read most of it. I set up a decent campaign for a couple of friends. Hopefully they’ll enjoy it. That shit ain’t easy. I will cry if they end up getting bored. 

This month I’m also reading Alice Isn’t Dead by Joseph Fink. I started reading it yesterday and I’m more than halfway through. See the difference between a textbook about creating a fictional world, and actual fictional world. 

Actual Fictional World. Huh.

Work Goals

As of writing this, I’m resigning in one day. It’s a bittersweet feeling since it’s been such a huge part of my life and the people I met along the way have been amazing and I’ll miss them. At the same time, I’m so tired of dealing with everyone’s bullshit. I learned that I’m not someone for a managerial position. 

Although, I’ve got something down the line (it’s dark and murky and I have no idea if it’s actually there) that might mean another job like that but I hope that it doesn’t deal with the same issues. 

1. Set up QA team by April 1st, 12:00PM

Got that off its feet and it’s doing fine. Right now it’s still in the infancy stage and things still need to change but I’ve gotten the ball to roll. The people handling this situation are far better suited to make this baby fly. 

2. Set up monthly incentive program by April 1st, 12:00PM

3. Set up phone rep incentive by April 1st, 12:00PM

Do you know how hard it is to start an incentive program? Pretty fuckin hard, m8. Alas, I failed these two. Or rather, I didn’t have time to get them started. I was tired of work. I was unable to ignite the tiniest bit of motivation to even work up the brainpower it requires to persuade the higher ups to see what the account needs. Besides, the QA program is still figuring itself out. That needs to become solid before we can do anything else. I could’ve stayed a couple months longer but I just couldn’t stomach it any longer than May. 

4. Do minimum 4 writing workshops at Spark

Okay, I’ve got an idea of a lesson plan ready. I’ve got Real Life Reference Material. And I have unemployment waiting for me. All I have to do now is set it up and make it a real thing. 

Money Goals

1. Get new debit card from BPI by April 17th, 12:00PM

I had to change it to April 17th because of...me not wanting to leave the house and actually do this. Goals can change. As far as my other goals, this is bottom priority. Still, I had to do it. My new card doesn’t arrive until the 8th so I won’t be able to make any changes to my patreon, spotify, and amazon. 

That means I can’t finish my clearance at my soon-to-be ex-company and that may delay my final pay. Regardless, it’s the set cards I chose to be dealt with. I wouldn’t have had to wait so long if I’d done this in March but here we are. No use crying about that now. At least it’s done. 

2. Pay mom back for treadmill by end of year.

I’m mad at my mom for personal reasons. Still, I’ll look into paying her shortly. It depends on the money situation the next few months. Again, bottom priority. And, as of this moment, I can’t be arsed to feel any sense of urgency around this. 

Five months in and the year is shaping up at little bit. I’m not where I want to be or where I imagined myself to be but I’m getting there. And I’m gonna be unemployed so honestly I can’t escape any farther. 

[animesavior]

“Even an adventurous crew like this one deserves a calm and relaxing day now and then. How many years…no, how many decades has it been since I could just sit around and take an afternoon nap in the sun without a care in the world? While I wondered the seas alone, I would lay my head down, not knowing if it was day or night, and dream of my long lost comrades…and Laboon. However it was precious little solice for when I awoke the fleeting joy became a press of loneliness. Yet, what could I do but repeat the cycle again. In those days I could find peace neither in slumber, nor in my waking hours. But now, if I listened carefully…I can hear my new friends all around me. I know I died and I am now nothing but bones but…I’m so very happy to still be alive. […] I’ve no doubt that this time of quiet will soon be replaced by the roaring sounds of adventure, a prospect I welcome wholeheartedly. But now, it’s a moment to rest one’s bones. Laboon, it seems that the next time we meet, I’ll have quite a few stories to share, old friend. Until then, I’ll keep dreaming of you, and I hope you’ll keep waiting on me.”

-          Brook, One Piece (Ep. 384)

The Toonami Trending Rundown for March 18-19, 2017. A big milestone for the better cartoon show this week as Toonami celebrates its 20th anniversary. And it would be a night to remember with some great moments including Jack getting chased down by the Daughters of Aku, and while trying to excape he kills one of them, learning that Aku’s loyalists aren’t all just “nuts and bolts”. Meanwhile, Beerus ramps up his power, hoping to see the full potential of Goku’s SSJ God abilities, and we end off Toonami’s current run of One Piece as Brook settles down and attempts to fit in as the newest member of the Strawhats.

On Twitter, Toonami and every show would successfully trend in the US and Worldwide during their respective East Coast airings, in addition to both #Toonami20, which was a hashtag used to commemorate the 20th anniversary, as well as #SandWhaleAndMe, as Toonami showcased the first part of the 5 part miniseries by Production IG. In addition, being One Piece’s final night, fans would make sure that show would go out with a bang, as #OnePiece would trend from the duration of its East Coast airing to its West Coast airing. Samurai Jack would also produce a character trend for the very first time with Aku, as 50 years on and after destroying all the known portals back to the past and hoping he would eventually die of old age to no avail, Aku has pretty much lost all motivation to try and kill Jack.

On Tumblr, both Samurai Jack and Dragon Ball Super would reach its trending list in addition to Tokyo Ghoul, as Toonami showcased a promo for its upcoming debut next week.

Finally, in a first for Toonami programming in the social media scene, both Samurai Jack and Dragon Ball Super would make the top two positions on Nielsen Social’s top 5 most talked about shows on Twitter and Facebook, the 16th and 17th time a Toonami show has made it onto the list since we started recording this feat. This would also be the second week in a row for Samurai Jack to reach the list in addition to becoming the 2nd time a show has reached the #1 spot, meanwhile this would be the 9th time in the 11 weeks it has aired so far that Super has made it onto the list.

Among some of the other features to commemorate the 20th anniversary, Adult Swim along with Titmouse created this short film titled "Exquisite Corpse". You can check it out below.

As the Spa Island mini-arc comes to a close, it pains for me to say that unfortunately due to flagging ratings, high costs in airing the show further, and perhaps a need to shake things up programming wise, among other things, Toonami has pulled the plug on One Piece’s run on the better cartoon show.

Initially as One Piece made its grand return to the block in 2013, things were great as Toonami enjoyed great ratings and social media buzz for the show alongside its Big 3 Shonen Jump counterparts in Bleach and Naruto. But as time marched on, ratings began to lag for multiple reasons, and by 2015 One Piece fell all the way down the schedule from 1am all the way to 2:30am and eventually being the lowest rated show on the block besides the rerun (and sometimes even being out-beaten by the rerun). At that point, the signs were probably there that the show’s days as a Toonami show were numbered. Granted, despite its shortcomings ratings wise, we all thought it was at least doing well enough to stay, and it did for a while, though we know now that it was no longer the case.

Quite a few factors likely played a role in One Piece’s demise. Some blame One Piece starting on episode 207 instead of episode 1, as newer viewers didn’t get to experience the events in those earlier episodes. To use a recently aired example, when Brook recalled his days with Laboon, Toonami never got to showcase the Strawhats encounter with Laboon, so the emotional aspects could’ve been lost with some people. Meanwhile, some blame the show not being able to catch up with the pace of the most recent dub episodes, being aired once a week. And although this is subjective, others have also commented that the show’s “goofy” feel and artstyle, for lack of a better term, could make it hard for some to take the show seriously, especially in regards to the show’s emotional moments.

Of course, One Piece’s sheer length may have played a part in its eventual demise. The show is presently up to 782 episodes and counting, which is getting right up there among the lengths of soap operas, and combined with the franchise having some heavy continuity, no doubt that some have been turned away because of the commitment. I myself was even turned away initially into One Piece because of this until Toonami’s airing got me interested. And even for those that are committed, with Toonami so far behind from where Funimation is at with the dub, much less where Japan is at (we ended at 384), along with the show only airing once a week and the show itself having no end in sight, it would have been near-impossible to catch up. Hence, this is why many decided to binge watch the series at their own pace instead, and this would show in the ratings.

And on that same note, there has been a bit of a backlash lately in regards to the amount of long runners on Toonami. When JoJo came on late last year, every single show on at the time save for Gundam and the 3am rerun would last on Toonami for at least two years. That doesn’t really give much room for a turnaround to get newer shows unless an expansion is in the cards, which we are seeing with the 11pm timeslot. While long runners do help with consistency to the block’s ratings, and no doubt the reason these shows are long is because of their immense popularity and demand for more, it doesn’t help if the popularity and overall buzz of said shows wear down. Both One Piece and Naruto have had some ratings fatigue as of late for various reasons, which is partly why they ended up at the back end of the block for the last few years. Meanwhile Hunter x Hunter fans have pleaded to Jason and the crew to keep that show at least at 1:30am for fear that it could suffer the same fate. And while JoJo’s and Gundam are doing fine for now, we feel that they could be doing much better. If you want Stardust Crusaders and IBO Season 2 to come to town, giving those shows the ratings support will help.

While Jason has promised more shows are still to come, possibly with expansion, but in regards to One Piece, it might have opened the can of worms in regards to cost considerations. With the direction things were going, One Piece would likely have been pushed to 3am or later to make way for those new shows. With most fans too tired to watch past 3am unless they used a DVR, the programming department at Toonami likely unable to pay high costs for a show so late, and Funimation and Toei likely unable to lower the renewal costs, Toonami decided it just wasn’t worth it anymore.

The problem could also go all the way back to the show’s days when 4Kids was the distributor. First impressions can often play a big role if a show becomes a smash hit or not, and with 4Kids poor handling of the show, fans were understandably turned off, and those first impressions among newer viewers were squandered. When Funimation took control, it would be too little, too late, as Toonami cancellation and the days of CN Real was upon the channel, and One Piece had to go elsewhere to gain its fanbase. One Piece would eventually rebound and gain immense popularity through other means and eventually another Toonami airing, but in comparison, the likes of DBZ and Naruto each received much better first impressions from both the Toonami and general audiences and both franchises currently benefit from massive nostalgic fanbases to this day in the US, something which we are seeing with the continued success of Dragon Ball Super and the hype for the upcoming Boruto series respectively.

In the end, for one reason or another, One Piece just never caught on among the Toonami and general American audiences as much as we hoped and various factors each played a role in One Piece’s hopes of staying on Toonami unsustainable. Combined with the demand for more variety from viewers and the need to keep Toonami growing overall, it was no surprise that changes had to be made. While I’m sure One Piece’s Toonami viewers and even the Toonami crew themselves did everything they could to make the show work, there just wasn’t enough support to realistically keep the ship going without Toonami running into significant problems both financing and timeslot wise at some point. And as we all know, the growth and health of Toonami as a whole is much more important than one single show.

While One Piece is a beloved show to many of us, and will likely continue to be for years to come, the reality is that Toonami just can’t continue airing a show if millions of people don’t agree and watch it week after week on the better cartoon show. While the One Piece fandom is anything but a vocal minority, with millions continuing to enjoy the manga and the show on streaming sites and disc sales around the world, in regards to Toonami viewership, even Jason DeMarco himself has mentioned that “One Piece fans have been far more vocal about the show on the internet than they are focused on watching the show on TV”.

And as Jason himself has regularly said, television is a democracy and people vote with their eyeballs. It’s the reason why Naruto Shippuden, despite having the same issues with not being able to catch up with the dub and constant complaints about filler, wasn’t put on the chopping block as well, for now at least. It’s the reason why the likes of Attack on Titan and Sword Art Online have been big hits both inside and outside Toonami’s reach despite discontent from the vocal minority of detractors (as we have seen with the success of Ordinal Scale in theaters for instance), and will both likely be back at some point to air their respective sequels. And it’s a big reason Toonami mainly focuses on action oriented anime and cartoons, as the likes of slice of life, sports anime, and live action, while big on other outlets, were pretty much flops when Toonami experimented with such shows. In this case, while there were plenty of eyeballs watching, there just weren’t enough watching per week to keep One Piece running much longer.

Consider this to be a big wakeup call to fans of every current and prospective show on the block, that if a show makes it on Toonami, it has to pull through when it comes to both Nielsen ratings and overall buzz. If the show does well, all will be good as we’ll get to enjoy the show in its entirety, and if a sequel were to come, the odds will be good if not all but assured that the show will return. If not, changes will be made and another show will get its chance instead, as we saw with One Piece leaving and Tokyo Ghoul on its way. It doesn’t matter what the critics think of a show, or what your opinion might be. The moral of this story is that if you truly want a show to stay, continue to watch and enjoy, but don’t be complacent and not watch thinking it will be there forever. As the old saying goes, you don’t know what you got until it is gone.

Personally as a fan who got into One Piece via Toonami, it is pretty disappointing to ponder what could have been for this franchise, but what it did do for Toonami social media wise is one worth celebrating. During its nearly 4 year presence, One Piece would use its opportunity the best it could and no doubt fans made sure their voices were heard. The hashtag #OnePiece would trend in some capacity a grand total of 137 weeks including 19 times during the Long Ring Long arc, 29 times during the Water 7 arc, 39 times during Enies Lobby (including a marathon during Christmas 2015 showcasing the finale of that arc), 11 times during the Lovely Land arc, 35 weeks during Thriller Bark, and was a perfect 3 for 3 during the Spa Island Arc.

The show also produced 26 different character/in-show content trends, some of which occurred multiple times, including 19 characters (Arlong, Brook, Chopper (including Chopper Man), Franky, Foxy, Kuma, Laboon, Luffy (Including Afro Luffy), Nami, Robin, Olvia, Sanji, Saul, Shanks, Sniper King, Spandam, Usopp, and Zoro), 2 attacks, (Buster Call and Third Gear), 1 response to an event (RIP Merry), and 3 story arc names (Enies Lobby, Impel Down (Which we never got to), and Water 7).

No doubt One Piece is a part of that great legacy Toonami has made that made millions of people into anime fans and for their respective success, Toonami owes a lot for One Piece, and One Piece owes a lot to Toonami. Unfortunately, things weren’t going as well as we all hoped and Toonami decided it was best to part ways. While no show can be able to fully replace One Piece, we do hope you continue to support the block going forward or at least the shows you enjoy as it continues to showcase great anime to American audiences. Sometimes change can be good and if Toonami can use this opportunity to keep bringing in new shows, the loss of this show will at least sting less. And who knows, we could be seeing the next generation of top tier anime air here soon enough that could inspire fans both new and old like One Piece did for us.

That all being said, we have seen time and again that nothing is impossible for the better cartoon show and perhaps one day One Piece could return to Toonami stronger than ever. We saw it when Toonami first brought back One Piece back in 2013, and who’s to say it can’t happen again when conditions improve? For now, if you want to continue watching One Piece, check out the DVDs/BluRays and Manga as well as checking out new episodes on FunimationNow and Crunchyroll. Funimation is presently hard at work with dubbing season 9, and while Toonami won’t be there to commemorate One Piece’s future milestones at least for now, the franchise’s popularity looks a lot stronger than before Toonami joined the fray. It will be interesting to see where the One Piece franchise goes in the years ahead as the quest to find One Piece continues.

So on behalf of the Toonami Faithful, bon voyage, Strawhats and thanks for the memories. We’ll miss you.

Starting out as a mere idea by Mike Lazzo, Sean Atkins, and Jason DeMarco, Toonami has grown over the past 20 years to be a major phenomenon and has played a major role for why Anime is as popular as it is today. I personally started watching Toonami when I was a young kid around 1998-ish when I stumbled into Cartoon Network one afternoon as Toonami was airing Sailor Moon. While back then, it was strange to be enjoying a “girl show”, I was instantly hooked, and along with DBZ, the ThunderCats, and later Gundam Wing, I became intrigued and later became a fan with what would we all know today as anime.

We may or may not have realized it at the time, but Toonami turned out to be something special as it helped jumpstart a golden age for the anime industry as many shows were created and/or brought over to American shores partly in response to Toonami’s success. Of course, we reaped the benefits of this golden age, as we were introduced to a plethora of both anime and action cartoons, many of which we have grown to love, and some we still enjoy today. The four dark years when Toonami was off the air aside, the block was, is, and likely will continue to be a “gateway drug” for millions of anime fans, and perhaps more to come.

What makes Toonami successful, at least to me, is that it is not necessarily one show. What makes up Toonami is the 9 great action anime/cartoons that it presently airs now, plus the hundreds of shows that it aired in the past, as well as the many shows that will make its way to the block in the future (whether there are new franchises or sequels to popular Toonami shows), not to mention the packaging and adventures of TOM and SARA. From its smash hits to its underrated gems, Toonami has always had something for everyone. Add in the occasional music video, movie or animated short, game review, or other special feature Toonami has every week, and you got something millions tune in or DVR weekly every Saturday.

If Toonami taught us anything these past few years, it’s that nothing really is impossible. A few years ago, it was thought to be impossible that Samurai Jack would get a 5th season. Fast-forward to today, and here we are, talking about what’s next. Hell, Toonami returning was a miracle in itself. While many have sought a return during its hiatus, the dream never became realistic until Mike Lazzo and the Adult Swim crew decided to run Toonami and some of its past shows during April Fool’s Day 2012 and possibly see if there was interest. The response was a clear yes, and so here we are today seeing Toonami continuing to do as they do best.

And of course, the future looks bright for the better cartoon show in the months and years ahead. With Samurai Jack’s return continuing to impress and FLCL’s return also on the horizon, more original productions might be on the pipelines ahead. New acquisitions will also await, whether they are smash hits or underrated gems, each hoping to see their full potential in the west, including Tokyo Ghoul which begins next week. Previously successful Toonami shows including Attack on Titan, Blue Exorcist, One Punch Man and Sword Art Online among others will be among those to watch for in regards to Toonami potentially airing their respective sequels at some point ahead. And of course, barring any other dips in popularity and cancellations, the likes of Dragon Ball, Gundam, Hunter x Hunter, JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure, and Naruto each looks to continue to impress Toonami audiences for months if not years to come. Of course, if you have anything in mind for Toonami to show, we always recommend you sending your show requests on appropriate outlets (ex. their Facebook and tumblr message boxes). You may never know if millions of other folks, the distributors, and the Toonami crew will agree and try to make it happen.

The next 20 years or so will be one to look forward to and we could see a lot more to come ahead. And if you ask me, the success of Toonami, its partners, and even its competitors will all play a key role for the future prospects of anime and action cartoons in the west in the years ahead. Could we see a second season of another beloved Toonami show? Further expansion? A comeback for movies? The next anime boom if it’s not happening already? Or could it all just come crashing down in the end? Nothing is certain, but nothing is impossible, and we could be seeing some great things ahead. Of course, it takes two to tango, and if you do wish to keep Toonami going for another 20 years, keep supporting Toonami and the anime industry overall as always.

We continue on creating that legacy this Saturday, as Tokyo Ghoul will make its long awaited debut on the better cartoon show at 1am, while Gundam Unicorn will showcase its second half at its new time at 2am, and Naruto Shippuden will continue on at 2:30am. On behalf of the Toonami Faithful, thanks for all the memories, and here’s to many more.

Legend: The shows listed are ordered based on their appearance on the schedule. Show trends are listed in bold. The number next to the listed trend represents the highest it trended on the list (not counting the promoted trend), judging only by the images placed in the rundown. For the Twitter tweet counts, the listed number of tweets are also sorely based on the highest number shown based on the images on the rundown.

United States Trends:

Toonami/#Toonami [#4]

#Toonami20 [#1]

#SamuraiJack [#1]

Aku (From Samurai Jack) [#2]

#DragonBallSuper (Also during the primetime presentation) [#1]

#SandWhaleAndMe [#1]

#DBZKai [#1]

#JoJosBizarreAdventure [#2]

#GundamUnicorn [#1]

#HunterXHunter [#1]

#Shippuden [#2]

#OnePiece (Also during the West Coast airing) [#1]

#GhostInTheSHell [#1]

Worldwide Trends:

#Toonami20 [#2]

#SamuraiJack [#3]

Aku (From Samurai Jack) [#4]

#DragonBallSuper [#7]

#SandWhaleAndMe [#8]

#DBZKai [#8]

#JoJosBizarreAdventure [#8]

#GundamUnicorn [#7]

#HunterXHunter [#8]

#Shippuden [#8]

#OnePiece [#1]

#GhostInTheSHell [#7]

Tweet Counts:

Toonami [13.9k tweets]

#Toonami [7,729 tweets]

#SamuraiJack [10.2k tweets]

#DragonBallSuper [4,800 tweets]

#DBZKai [1,767 tweets]

#JoJosBizarreAdventure [2,027 tweets]

#HunterXHunter [2,259 tweets]

#OnePiece [6,100 tweets]

Tumblr Trends:

#tokyo ghoul

#samurai jack

#dragon ball super

Notes and Other Statistics:

#Toonami: @WhoTrendedIT reported that @blumspew and @adultswim started the trend in the US.

#DBZKai: @WhoTrendedIT reported that @FUNimation started the trend in the US.

#HunterXHunter: @WhoTrendedIT reported that @VIZMedia started the trend in the US.

Special thanks to @coreymbarnes​, @jmb70056​, @TheNextHokage and others I forgot to mention for spotting some of the trends on this list.

Eat Up. Only Toonami on [adult swim] on Cartoon Network.

[ecotone99]

Six Under [RF]

(LINE SPACING IS WEIRD IN PLACES BECAUSE I COPIED IT FROM MS WORD)

There was a sharp clank and the man muttered something immediately. He looked down and reached for his pocket as soon as he could. The man standing beside him was still tracking the ball over the tall beige grass and up as it bounced off the concrete path and into a patch of shrubs as the first man was already leaning over toward the ground. The ball wobbled around and rolled off the tee as soon as he spiked it into the ground.

“Relax.”

The first man kept his eyes fixed on the ball and adjusted his feet. He swung again.

“Better.” He turned around as soon as the ball made contact with the grass directly ahead.

“See, you have to relax.”

The second man stepped into the box and set up his ball. The first man pulled out his phone, tapped the screen, and looked at it some before looking up when he heard the swing had made contact.

“There it is,” the second man said to himself.

“Nice.”

“You don’t need to keep checking it like that. They only update it a couple times a day.”

He slid the phone into his pocket.

“I bet on Saturdays they only do it once toward the end of the work day. You don’t need to keep checking it.” “You shouldn’t have told me about it if you didn’t want me checking it.”

The cart path arced away from the fairway, around a solitary boulder and then back toward the mowed grass, descending at a steep grade. They’d both hit it well over the three hundred yard mark so the cart ride down the hill wasn’t a short one.

“You went to school in St. Louis, no?” The second man asked as they wound around the rock.

“Mhm,” the first man nodded. The turn was sharp and he had to lean back into the seat in order to straighten his arm out enough to spin the wheel almost twice around without using the other hand.

“You ever drive out there?”

“From Dallas, I did.”

“That’s right. Well, I get to drive out to Champaign next weekend.”

“And that’s your oldest that’s going there, right?” “Emma, yes.”

“First year?”

“Third. She’s taking the Mazda out there. She didn’t have a car the first two years. I’m flying back through Chicago.” The first man pulled off the concrete path and parked the cart. “When do you get to do all that fun stuff?”

“Next fall.” “And that’s Trevor, right?”

“Right.” He pulled out a club from the bag at the back of the cart and began scanning the ground to locate his ball, which he had just seen somewhere. “Any idea where?” “He’s still set on playing baseball, so right now it’s not up to him.”

“Does he have anything at all in mind yet?” the second man asked, finally deciding on a club.

“No, not really.”

They made quick work of these shots and then of the next and the second man missed a short putt while the first man ended up with his second birdie in a row.

“What position does Trevor play?”

“First base and he pitches; some outfield, too.”

“He’s a lefty, too, then?”

The first man nodded. They drove along a row of houses that stood tall on the other side of a ribbon of dry grass and yuccas with white and yellow hairs hanging off their stiff leaves. On the opposite side of the fairway was another line of houses. The clear sun was behind the buildings and the tall walls paneled with siding all looked a uniform light gray. Both rows ended along the green and there was a wide and empty neighborhood street lined with young trees that cut across the course in an arc bending toward the green and then climbing up through bare ground on the right and on the left.

This time the first man badly missed a putt while the second knocked one in from twenty-five feet.

“Very nice, very nice,” he nodded as he estimated the distance in his head.

They loaded the clubs in their bags.

“We got a really good day for this. I thought it’d be hotter already.”

“It would have been nicer yesterday morning.”

“Definitely, yesterday was perfect.”

“Sure, yesterday was perfect.

The first man slowly pressed down the brake and stopped at crosswalk where the cart path intersected the street. The second man looked over at him and saw him turn to check the road both ways. There were no cars and none had come by when they putted. The path dipped deeper down on the other side of the street and led toward a canopy tent set up near the middle tee box. There were two women in the tent, one older and one younger, they stood up from their chairs as soon as they saw the cart approaching.

“Just the two of you?” the older woman asked after greeting the men.

“We’re not in the tournament. There were some no-shows and we managed to squeeze in before the first public tee-time they had. We’re with the group but not actually in the tournament. Ed, you know, the organizer, and his wife might be doing the same thing we’re doing right behind us.”

“So the tournament is over?”

“The four in front of us were the last ones.”

The man looked over at the table that had served as a bar.

“It’s just beer. And it’s almost out anyway. You guys want some?”

“Is that a question?”

The first man was standing closer to the kegs, so he turned toward the younger woman as she grabbed two plastic cups and began filling them.

“You’re with the company, too?” the older woman asked.

“Pete Dyer and that’s Ron McCall.”

“Oh my God, I almost didn’t recognize you!” she clapped her hands, “Dyer! Emma Dyer was friends with Kate,” she turned to the younger woman.

“Oh my God, how is Emma?” the young woman squealed.

“She’s great. She’s here now for the end of the summer and we’re driving out next weekend.”

“Indiana, right?” the older woman interjected.

“Illinois.”

“But she did get into Indiana, didn’t she? She was looking at it?”

“She might have. That sounds right.”

The spout was starting to sputter as the younger woman poured the second cup.

“Pour it in here. It’ll stay cold longer.”

The woman handed him one cup, poured the other over into the steel mug he’d grabbed from the cart and then turned back toward the keg and topped off the thermos. The man grabbed both and tipped her a five-dollar bill. He sat back down in the cart. Once again, he pulled out his phone, tapped the screen, then tapped it again and looked straight at it, scrolled, and turned it off and put it back in his pocket. Seeing this, the other man slowly ended his conversation with the older woman. He looked at the beer in the cup holder. “Just one?”

“I’ve got mine here,” he held up the mug.

They quickly hit their drives. It was a long par five that bent gently toward the right. The first man’s ball landed near a long bunker along the left edge of the fairway as he had aimed. The second man, however, pushed his some and landed on the right side, from where the ball rolled further down toward the rough and on his next shot he would have to hit around a patch of trees.

As they walked back to the cart, the young woman held up a full cup and handed it to the first man and asked the second if he wanted the cup he’d carried to the tee topped off. There was no point in taking back a cup and a half of beer in a keg, she said. Most of what came out was foam but there was some beer too.

“It’s not a bad beer.”

“Good. I’ve got a lot in this, take the second one if you want it.”

“You sure?”

He nodded. They followed the path down two thirds up the fairway and parked near the cottonwoods.

“Pull up to the trashcan,” the second man said, holding up his empty cup, and the first obliged.

The second man hit first and did so as well as he could, going around the trees and still landing on the fairway. The first man had walked with him to the ball, but then walked back to the cart to grab a club.

From the cart, he could see his the other man through the cottonwoods, waiting for him by the ball. He took a few steps on a footpath that cut through the obstruction. The grass between the trees wasn’t mowed but it was ankle-high at its tallest. He looked at it and at the reddish rocks and small shrubs and yellow flowers that grew from the grass made it look natural and good. Under the tall trees there was enough shade to cover all the ground but the shade wasn’t cool.

The man looked up and saw to the his right that the trees hung low to the ground and he couldn’t see the three round bunkers or the green through their yellow-tinted leaves. The tranquil air in the shade grew warmer; he stepped back and circled round the patch of trees toward the second man waiting for him near the middle of the open fairway.

He stood over the ball, positioned his feet, reared back and swung. The ball sliced hard, over most of the rough and toward the concrete path. He cussed and took a few deep breaths to compose himself.

“You’re gonna be fine,” the second man said as they got in the cart. “For what it’s worth, from what you said it doesn’t sound like it could have been that bad,” he added after they’d started moving.

“Where was it again?” he asked as they approached the area where the errant ball must have landed. He looked over at him and asked again. The first man sighed.

“17th near where Kellerman used to have his office.” He looked straight ahead.

“Do you know if the cart girls are coming by or do they not have them because of the tournament?” the second man asked as they were finally getting off the green.

“I wouldn’t know.”

The cart came by as they were wrapping up the tenth hole. The second man bought two cans of beer, something heavier and stronger than the two and a half beers he’d received for free and the first man bought one. The former made quick work of most of his first can and held it in his hand while the latter set his in the cup holder.

The day didn’t warm much around them but as they passed the street that ran just beyond the green on the eleventh they could smell the asphalt.

The twelfth was a sharp but short dogleg and the two matched each other in hitting near-perfect drives to cut overtop of the trees.

Near the next tee they stopped just under the fences running behind a row of tall houses that looked down on them and on the previous green. The houses had no yards and stood close enough to the path that even with the sky high up in the sky they still cast down a cold shadow across the concrete.

“The Morgans just moved to one of these houses or one of the ones on fifteen that are like this.”

The first man looked up to see the buildings, all white with dark gray roofs and black railings around their balconies and rear stairs. The cart stood in the cold shade for a moment and reached back toward his bag for some water.

“It must be seven hundred K,” added the second man, “at the very least.”

“Aren’t they divorced?”

“I don’t think it ever actually happened.”

“Meg might have mentioned something, now that I think of it, something to do with their daughter. What was the deal there, anyway? Wasn’t there some woman?” He took a drink from his water bottle but the water had gotten hot enough to almost burn.

“No, that was a rumor.” The second man downed the last half of his first can of beer. “Usually when you hear that it’s just rumors. And in that case I know it wasn’t true.”

“Well, I’m glad they worked it out.” As he poured the water out onto the concrete he looked at his phone again and they continued on.

“Do you want to get lunch here or should we go somewhere else?”

“I’m not very hungry. I’ll probably go home.” “We didn’t stop for breakfast.”

“I’m just not hungry.” “Then let’s just go in for a beer. And I’m sure you’ll get lunch.” “Fine, but I have to be back early. I have to drive out to the airport. Meg’s parents are flying in.” “You’re taking Meg’s car?”

The first man nodded.

“How long are they staying for?” “I don’t remember exactly.”

On the next hole, the green was on an island of sorts, but instead of water what ringed it was a band of large rocks. The first man’s ball landed right at the near edge of the fairway above the gray moat. The rocks lined the deep bed of a dry drainage ditch where water never flowed.

His next shot cleared the rocks but didn’t quite land on the green and the ball rolled back down, stopping just above the gray broken granite. He didn’t walk back to the cart or toward the bridge over the jagged spillway.

The air felt heated and still as he descended into the gap. All he could see from the bottom were the rocks all around and the clear sky above and looking to the left he saw the metal supports of the bridge. He turned right, then, and there he saw the ditch rise up, looking like a narrow scree chute. Up through the V-shaped gully he could see far away a hillside covered in tall beige grass swaying under the wind. A gust blew down the ditch and he felt it hot against his cold skin. He scrambled up the rocks and he couldn’t run up fast without using one hand to grab the scalding stones for support.

At the top the second man waited for him and reached out his hand. With the wedge he’d brought along, the first man got the ball to within inches of the hole.

From the next tee they could see down over a swath of dark gray roofs, rising up one behind another up to the crest of a hill. The first man lined up for his drive, reared back and swung. The swing was violent and he lost grip with his top hand on the follow-through. He reached for a second ball and tee.

“Come on now,” the second man laughed. The first said nothing and planted the ball in the ground. Without a practice swing he again reared back and this time hit a low line drive. Again without a word, he reached for another ball. The third try was more to his satisfaction.

“You have to relax,” the second man said.

“Not that easy.”

“You can’t do anything about it now. You’re gonna be fine.”

They got back in the cart.

“You said there was nobody there, right?”

“Right.” “You said you went back and checked if there were cameras, right?”

“Right.” “And there weren’t any.”

“There weren’t.”

“So you’re good.” He patted him on the shoulder. The first man braked to a halt on the grassy shoulder of the path. He reached for his pocket and pulled out his phone. “Hey, what’s up? – Yeah, we only have three holes left. – Yeah, just us two. We’re probably gonna stop for lunch here. – Yes, yes, I remember. It’s just the two of us, I’ll be home before four. – Where are you? – You should come here and get lunch, then. – It’ll make things easier, too. You can just pick me up and Pete will be able to go straight home.” “I can drive you, it’s totally fine, it’s not out of the way at all,” the second man was quick to whisper.

“Meg says she needs to get something from the store so she needs to come this way anyway,” he said and put the phone back to his ear.

“You should come, that makes the most sense. – Yeah, just us two. – I wasn’t planning on staying long anyway. – Come on. – We still have a half hour left, probably. – Okay, should I just get you what you usually get? – So what do you want, then? – Got it. – I know, I don’t want to stay long either. – Alright. – Alright. We’ll see you in a bit.” He ended the call and shut off his screen but promptly opened it again and quickly refreshed a screen that had been open.

“Isn’t Meg friends with the Morgans?” the second man asked as they were driving from their next shot to the green. He looked straight ahead.

“Only with whatever her name is. What’s her name?”

“Kelly, I think. But I’m not sure.”

“Why do you ask?”

“Just curious,” he turned his head toward the first man, “we were talking about them earlier.” “She’s over every once in a while, but I don’t like the guy. I’ll talk to him if I have to, but that’s it.” He looked over at the second man who responded with a nod of agreement.

The eighteenth hole was on small peninsula jutting out into a round pond and they looked at it from the tee high up above. On one side there was a patch of faded reeds, but on the near side and along the green the cut grass came down to almost to the water, from which it was separated by a narrow bed of polished white stones that ringed the pool.

The clubhouse was in view, just to the right of the green and the sky above was still cloudless and the sun shone brilliant and cool. As the first man teed off, the second was silent, glancing again at the scorecard. The quadruple bogey on the twelfth had all but ended things then and there. He needed to birdie the last hole just to go even on the day and he’d still lose by a touchdown.

They walked around the pond and toward the green. The first man walked close to the water and peered down into it. The pond didn’t give off any dampness in the air, it was shallow and didn’t reflect the sky above. He could see the smooth rocks that lined the bottom.

After knocked in the putt for par, he grabbed his clubs off the cart and put the full can of beer in a storage compartment beside the steering wheel. Next, he screwed opened the lid in the silver mug and put it upside down in the grass next to the wheel of the cart. He looked at the scorecard, saw the score, and tossed it onto the seat.

“What will it be?” the waiter asked the first man after he’d sat down at a table just inside a roofed terrace overlooking a tennis court.

“Give us a few minutes. Pete Dyer is here too. He’s putting the cart back and he’ll be right up.”

“Do you need menus?” “I think we’re fine.” “That’s what I was thinking.”

“I’ll move tables. I didn’t realize this one was under a vent.” The long dining room was nearly empty and the windows were all closed.

He pulled his phone out and refreshed the page again but nothing had changed. He set it down on the table and looked up. Past two pruned spruce trees that glistened in a stark bluish and silver hue he could see a long crest topped with large boulders and covered with shrubs. There were houses at its base, but the windows were high enough off the floor that he couldn’t see them while seated.

The waiter came back with three waters.

“Anything to drink while you wait? Jameson-ginger ale?” he grinned.

“I’ll have a martini,” the second man said from behind the waiter, startling him some. “How are you today?” “Alright.” “You do gin, correct?”

“Correct.”

“Tanqueray, right?” “What’s the well again?” “Seagram’s? Gordon’s? I don’t know, to be honest.”

“Check it. If it doesn’t look awful, I’ll do it. Otherwise, I’ll take whatever.” “And for you?”

“I’m fine.”

“Do you need a menu?” “No, I know what I want.”

“Let’s wait for Meg.” The wife arrived before the waiter came back with the martini.

“When was the last time we had one car? When Trevor was born, maybe?”

“Mhm.” “I was just thinking: Didn’t I have the transmission give out in the Nissan?” “That’s right.”

“But we had that for how many years by then? Ten?”

“Something like that.” “And you haven’t had this car for longer than a year and a half. That’s crazy. They just build total crap now.”

The first man looked up and nodded and again glimpsed the brown and golden hillside out the window. “What’s wrong?” she looked at both men but then turned toward her husband.

“Nothing. It was a hot day out there. I just need to cool off.”

She touched his forehead as if to check for a fever.

“You seem fine.” “I am fine. I just need to cool off.”

The waiter came back and set the drink down in front of the second man.

“Are you ready to order?” “I’ll have the salmon and orange salad, probably no goat cheese. Salmon; so maybe a chardonnay with that. Honey?”

“I’ll do the BLT, no sides. Just the sandwich.” “I’m not hungry,” the second man looked up from his drink when the waiter looked toward him. “Actually, I don’t know, let’s do side order of fried,” he said, seeing the other man looking at him from across the table.

“And for you to drink?”

“I’m good with water.”

“What’s wrong?” the wife asked again.

“Nothing. Like I said, nothing. I just didn’t sleep well last night.” The server read back their orders and walked back toward the kitchen.

“If you don’t feel well, we shouldn’t be here.” “I feel fine.” “You don’t look fine.”

“I am fine.” He stood up. “I need to go wash my hands before the food gets here.”

The woman pulled her phone out from her purse and looked at it over the table.

The waiter came with the wine.

“How are you today?” the woman asked.

“I’m great. How are you?”

“I’m okay. I’m okay.”

The waiter nodded and stood in place.

“Did you work last night?”

“I did.” “Were Kelly and Dan here?”

“Dan was here. With that other couple they come with. I can’t remember their names ever. But they come here often with them.” “But Kelly wasn’t here?” “I didn’t see her.” “Okay. Ron will have more water when you get a chance.”

The second man looked up and past the woman and toward the bar, where the bartender was pouring a glass of red wine while facing toward them. Their server stood next to the bartender and faced the opposite way. The bartender then looked up toward the table and he and the second man briefly locked eyes.

The first man came back from the bathroom and sat down.

“My phone is dead. Can I call Trev from yours? I need to tell him to vacuum downstairs.” The man opened his phone. “Just a second.”

The woman didn’t see his eyes open up wider and his forehead stiffen; he began to go pale and the jaw and tongue inside his mouth moved faintly as though he was reading something with his lips sealed almost completely. He blinked his eyes deliberately and in an instant his whole face relaxed from the jaw upward. He swallowed and closed the screen.

“Here you go.”

He exhaled.

“More water for you,” said the waiter holding a glass decanter.

“Let’s do that Jameson-ginger ale.”

“I’ll have it right out.” “And let’s do a martini for him again.” “Did you like that one?”

“Do his regular one.” “I’m gonna guess I know who won today.”

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[hellosaltysaladcollectionstuff]

CARA BLACK IS definitely in a select class of PI writers on the West Coast.

The late Sue Grafton certainly paved the way with her Kinsey Millhone series, also referred to as the Alphabet mysteries, but there are few like Black alive today who has faithfully delivered one book in the same series more or less once a year since 1998. In fact, Black recently celebrated the 20th anniversary of Aimée Leduc’s introduction to readers.

An avowed “pantser,” who prefers to write by the seat of her pants than through outlines, Black is working through 20 arrondissements of Paris by way of the investigations of her private detective, Aimée Leduc. Her 18th, Murder on the Left Bank, has just come out in paperback, and her next mystery, Murder in Bel-Air, which will be out next month, followed by a new standalone set during World War II.

Last year, I attended a workshop on writing villains that she led at the Sisters of Crime Los Angeles meeting, in addition to a reading at Vroman’s Bookstore in Pasadena. We had a wonderful lunch at Fiore Café, and later I posed these questions to her.

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NAOMI HIRAHARA: I was first introduced to you and your work at a regional mystery conference in Pasadena in 2003. You were discussing your third installment in the Aimée Leduc mystery series, and now it’s almost 16 years later and you’ve released your 18th! I know that it may be difficult for you to identify the reasons why you have been able to deliver and publish these installments so regularly, but can you give me one internal motivation and/or discipline and one external one involving the publishing world and readers?

CARA BLACK: That’s a good question. When I began writing Murder in the Marais, my first novel, I had no idea that my character Aimée Leduc would continue and that I would write a series featuring her set in Paris. Encouraged by my editor, I wrote the next story, based where I was staying in Belleville, at my friend’s. I began thinking a lot about what would have happened in the time since her last investigation in her personal and work life with her friends and colleagues. I just progressed her from there. But I still pinch myself that I get to keep doing this — who knew, I didn’t, when I started writing that I’d get intimate with a fictional character and have a long-term relationship?

It’s been that way with each story, and I can feature the social issues in Paris and France at that time as well as her character growth. Writing Aimée became a way to investigate the darker side of the City of Light, explore things my friends talked about, get the police angle, and dovetail history. I guess internally it’s been a vehicle for me to exercise my curiosity about the elusive French I meet.

Externally, I feel lucky to have a publisher who promotes the series and readers who ask for more.

You have only two more arrondissements to write about. How did you go about selecting each arrondissement for each novel? Did you plan way ahead? And what happens after the 20th Aimée mystery?

As I said above, I had no master plan to write a series. I have just written and chosen arrondissements that appeal to me, whether it’s the landscape, its place in history and how Paris grew and became the city we know today, the stories organic to it. The arrondissement, which to me is a character, evokes a place, a time, and a crime that could only happen there. It’s organic. Not that crime can’t happen anywhere, but it’s the why here, why now that imbues vitality. I wish I could plan ahead but I’m not that organized. In Aimée’s character arc, there will be some resolution in the last story, but I’m clueless as to that and what I’ll do. But I visited Marseille recently and loved it and it could be another setting.

There’s been a lot of discussion of you beginning the series in 1993 and just moving the time incrementally (weeks or months) with each installment. What research tricks do you have in staying in the 1990s? With the advancement in digital technology, have you encountered easier ways of accessing the past? If so, please share.

My neighbor is a French programmer who worked in Paris in the ’90s, so he keeps me honest, such as reminding me that characters would use dial-up and other great details. I consult French police who worked in the ’90s; some are retired now, and they recount procedure and cases going on at the time. They even touch upon the rivalry between certain law enforcement branches. I guess we could liken it to the rivalry between the FBI and Special Forces French-style. Back then, only the French military had GPS access. My research is in historical archives, specifically consulting magazines like Paris Match and daily French newspapers on microfiche. This is invaluable. I can read the paper to know what was on sale, what strike was happening in Paris, the weather, the current world events, what movies were out, shows playing, foreign leaders visiting Paris. I also lived on and off in Paris in the ’90s, so I do remember.

Aimée now has a baby, her first as a single mother. What issues have you encountered in writing about a mother of an infant in terms of her crime-fighting investigations? As her daughter continues to develop, how will you balance Aimée’s mothering responsibilities with her work as a private investigator?

My editor encouraged me to shake Aimée’s life up a bit, to challenge myself as a writer. So Aimée’s life as both a mother and a professional investigator leads her into this new role of juggling, as so many parents find themselves doing. Aimée is now a single maman. When the story starts in September 1999, her baby Chloé is 10 months old. Aimée is running her detective agency, which focuses on computer crime, and constantly juggling her life, work, baby, and the man in her life. In other words, trying to do her best to earn the daily baguette and butter it. She’s lucky to have Babette, a nanny whom she shares with a family across the courtyard. Aimée needs to pick up her daughter from bébé swim, and life gets more complicated every minute. Murder in Bel-Air opens with Aimée about to give a PowerPoint presentation on computer security to a select, mostly male group of CEOs, the movers and shakers — when she gets that call all parents dread: her daughter’s been left at the playgroup and no one else is able to pick her up. Not only that, but Aimée’s American mother abandoned her daughter at the playgroup and has disappeared. So Aimée’s got to juggle her business, caring for her daughter and now worrying over her mother and if her mother really did leave the CIA.

Do you have some sort of character bible, timeline, and/or chronology to keep you clear on Aimée’s life moments as well as other central characters? What’s been the biggest continuity mistake you’ve made, and how have you fixed it?

I wish I had a character bible. Even a list of the shoes Aimée has worn. Which is funny because my publisher asked me for one. Stymied, I was on deadline and didn’t have time to go back through my books. So the handy-dandy folks at my publisher came up with one and made a bag and it looked like this.

The biggest continuity issue was that I’d put Aimée’s age in the first book, Murder in the Marais. This presented issues, especially with her biological clock. So on the 10th anniversary special issue my editor said I could change anything in that story. So I took out her age.

I know that you go to Paris frequently, at least once a year. Share three little-known locations that are great for authors, either for writing or observation opportunities. And also three favorite restaurants under the radar (please mention your favorite dishes, too).

Only three? Well, I’ll try.

Definitely start at the Place des Vosges in the Marais, the 17th-century arcaded square for the beauty, and go behind it to the courtyard of Hotel Sully (it’s not a hotel, but a hôtel particulier, which is what they call townhouse mansions). There’s an incredible bookshop nestled inside.

Stroll on the banks of the Seine at twilight opposite Île Saint-Louis.

Drink an apéro outside at Chez Prune, a cool place, on the Canal Saint Martin.

Museum-wise, the Musée de la Chasse, a hunting museum, in an old hôtel particulier in the Marais.

The Balzac museum in the 16th arrondissement, where Balzac wrote hiding from his creditors.

Most of all, be a flâneur, a walker with no particular destination, and see where the streets take you. It’s always a good idea, and you’ll discover Paris.

Foodwise, the jewel-like eclairs from L’éclair de Genie, roasted cauliflower at Miznon in the Marais, and the Lebanese wrap stand on Rue Rambuteau.

You are currently working on a new manuscript, a standalone historical. What can you tell us about it? After being in Aimée’s world, are you exhilarated or terrified to inhabit the minds of totally new characters? How did you make the transition? (Any burning of sage or other rituals?)

Hmm … burning sage is a good idea. I’m excited and a bit terrified. It’s about going back to the past, to another time, and immersing myself. On my wall, I’ve put up a 1940 Paris map — a special one that was issued to the occupying German soldiers with the Kommandantur, locations of the cinemas and canteens for German soldiers, and authorized bordellos. I’ve always collected old black-and-white photos circa the ’30s and ’40s at flea markets and street sales in Paris. Also, I copied files of alleged collaborators in the military archives at Bois de Vincennes. My great friend in Paris is 90 years old and joined the Resistance when he was 14. Whenever we can, we go out to eat and he loves to drive around Paris (yes, he still drives!) and show me spots where he hid, where the ladies of the night would give him bonbons, and where his father was arrested.

That sounds wonderful. I’m a sucker for stories set around World War II, and I can’t wait to see what you do independent of Aimée. I’m sure it will be an adjustment, but one that will not only service your standalone, but also inform your return to your series.

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Naomi Hirahara is the author of several books of fiction and nonfiction, including the Edgar Award–winning Mas Arai series and the forthcoming mystery novel Iced in Paradise.

The post The Darker Side of the City of Light: An Interview with Cara Black appeared first on Los Angeles Review of Books.

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