#immensely important question

[xxplastic-cubexx]

HAVE U SEEN THAT ONE CHERIK DEVIL AND ANGEL COSTUME HALLOWEEN ART THAT ONE COMIC BOOK ARTIST DID ON TWT

NO CAUUUUUSSE YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HOW FAST I MADE THE WHOLE THING MY HOMESCREEN: THE ARTIST IS JOSH CASSARA AND I OWE HIM EVERYTHING

the fuckin sillies chat i cant STAND them……

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

one of these days i'll write up a post about the parallels and foils between vivi and hermes and why it fucking kills me. for now all i can say is in hindsight the 'latched onto vivi Hard as a kid' to 'latched onto hermes Hard as an adult' pipeline is Real

[im-a-chunky-potato]

"honestly I think I'm too deep in the Nikolai RABBIThole to even consider changing"

Potato, I-I...is this pun intended? 😂

that's something Nikolai would do SJDJS

HC that nikolai is also rabbit coded /j

Like a rabbit, Nikolai is lonely deep inside and keeps hopping to freedom because like a rabbit, there's nothing else to do when the predator (of emotions/societal norms) comes running to get you. Rabbits are usually kept as pets in cages. But Nikolai decided he wont be that rabbit. He is a master of hearing, and 'can communicate using a secret code' which he probably did w fyodor during missions. 🐰

^^ (̶l̶i̶v̶e̶ ̶d̶e̶m̶o̶n̶s̶t̶r̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶m̶e̶ ̶w̶i̶n̶g̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶m̶y̶ ̶m̶i̶d̶t̶e̶r̶m̶s̶ ̶) /j 😂🤡

I dare you to draw Nikolai w rabbit ears for halloween 😈

(jk, only if ur in need of drawing ideas lol)

...yes? (No, no it was not)

Hhsysh I love how you pulled out all of the evidence for this. I LOVE IT! Nikolai is not rabbit coded like Sigma, but yet he works perfectly as a rabbit.

He runs away (or hops ig?) from his humanity like a scared rabbit. And he's aware of the world and how guilty he is just like how rabbits have good ears and senses.

YOURE ON, I NEVER BACK DOWN

If you don't give him his carrots, he will find you and light your house on fire<3

[clownprince]

"you can't just ignore massive narratively consequential chunks of a characters' story that you don't like or disagree with" actually i can. and i do. and it's very easy ^_^

[speckeltail]

idk meta about my interps of riddler and aaron and what it means for them and how they treat each other

spinning off in my own little world has yielded what I am absolutely sure to be an only slightly insane interpretation of tb!riddler; this is someone who's been dismissed, belittled, scapegoated, used countless times, whose inflated sense of ego is... yes, an inflated sense of ego, but also a cover for an insanely damaged self-esteem and general inability to connect with other people. he's defensive of his interests because they've always been mocked until they're useful, he's defensive and selfish with his skills because when he works for someone else and does as he's told he's accustomed to taking the fall. he doesn't trust when people are nice to him because he's been primed to see it as an attempt at manipulation... and he worked as an operator for a carnival game in what I see as his late teens + early twenties while he was getting his degree, so he knows full well what it's like to be manipulative. being an operator for a fun little carnival game where the fun of playing is the real prize is different from leading someone on and stealing their work, though. the biggest similarity is that the games are rigged from the start and only an idiot wouldn't see that (he didn't see that, what does that make him).

so it leaves him intensely distrusting, competitive, accustomed to relying on only himself (except for his little nerd armada, god I love the riddlemen they're perfect in every way) and letting himself be the only person to call the shots. at the same time... he is desperately reaching out for connection. he's lonely! he wants to be validated and treated like he has value for being just a person, not for his immense smarts, though he'd appreciate that too.

aaron coming into the picture doesn't necessarily change things so much as it puts a new coat of paint over it, because eddie finds himself in the same position his own father was in (and failed) but also... not at all. not in the slightest. he saw, in aaron, a kindred spirit who was used, who was abandoned, someone who wanted to get back at a system that was rigged from the start. and, I mean, it's not like Batgirl and Robin aren't on the scene. (and prank and scorn, which is its own thing.) the way I see it, eddie didn't intend for aaron to be more comfortable as sphinx. it just... happened. eddie sinks deeply into riddler as a protective layer against the world (prickly intellect and a mean streak that quite frankly dissolves the very second it's not of use?), aaron takes the thing he loved that became a horrible burden and a source of pain and turns it into the weapon he uses to get back at the world as sphinx.

to some degree, eddie is trying to protect and nurture the child in him that loved puzzles and was shot down at every turn. aaron is the opposite; he grew up fast, too fast, was on a global stage at fourteen and acting like an adult (without the adult privilege of making decisions for himself) and being treated like an adult with his area of expertise. eddie trips facefirst into love with someone who is only using him, and pays the price; aaron carefully portrays himself as someone unattainable and undesirable in his relationship with the other villain sidekicks, prank and scorn. (the context for that is sphinx went to them each separately, after their respective disasters, and went; hey. nobody's going to look out for us. people are going to try and use us. people won't take us seriously. we have to look out for each other. and they have a groupchat where aaron talks scorn down from doing dumb violent shit and donnie goes through cycles where he relapses into prank with joker. all very interesting. I should talk about it later. he's very much a mother hen because like eddie, he needs a sense of control and he cares deeply for people).

so... aaron acts like an adult, mainly. eddie helps him make a fake identity and aaron takes over from there. he's trying to be as convenient as possible, and it never comes out but he's afraid that he'll be discarded as soon as he's more trouble than he's worth-- which would distress eddie if he found out. sphinx is useful, and smart, and eager to please, and takes care of himself. sphinx is altogether more comfortable to be than aaron, who is anxious and doesn't know how to ask for help or care and feels ashamed that he wants it. eddie is his superior, not a father figure. neither of them know how to navigate this.

when aaron graduates high school, he goes to college-- this is when he stops being sphinx and starts being tyto, triggered by him investigating the disappearance of a classmate and friend and discovering a seedy underbelly to newark. it's where his and eddie's similarities come to an uncomfortable forefront. aaron, when given the opportunity, is obsessive. he's willing to wait, but only for so long. a few years ago I was pretty adamant about aaron not killing, but over the years I've honestly changed my mind... I think that he doesn't intentionally kill, but it's happened. and with the people he's targeting, he's not especially guilty about it.

anyway, eddie doesn't figure out about tyto for a while, he thinks that aaron's just retired aside from visiting gotham and doing sphinx stuff for him as a favor on long weekends and holidays, and when he does he's surprised at how much he does not like it. he did invite sphinx into the whole business with the promise of getting back at people who hurt them (and the world, in general, and the way things are rigged, and it's fine for them to break the rules because nothing is fair) but that was stealing money. blackmailing people, at most! silly bullshit like jello bombs. people in speeding cars they control so they're not really in any danger. distractions. you know. supervillainy? tyto is not a supervillain. tyto is not even necessarily a vigilante, though that's what he's treated as. tyto is indeed getting back at people with precise and violent intent, much as an unsupervised nineteen year old with extensive training and too much compassion for his own good might.

it's not going to end well! it's a hopeless crusade that leaves power vacuums and is endless work, and what's going to happen when aaron graduates? How the hell can Eddie respond to that? he can't tell aaron to stop because he's not in charge of him anymore. he doesn't disagree with what aaron is doing but it might get him killed, and in fact there is a high chance that it might get him killed.

anyway I think that's what makes eddie realize that he cares for aaron a lot more deeply than he ever expected he does, or should. and once again things are spiraling out of his control and the only thing he can do is watch and hope there's enough pieces left to pick up.

[deva-26]

My current mood, reaction, and opinion is…

[lxverofmine]

just saw something on my feed and decided not to comment on it bc i didn't want to be rude

i'm being so strong

[dunmesh]

okay i don't have anything smart to add i just genuinely love that these seemingly trivial jokes are actually an important part of his character. we see it throughout the entire manga, how he pushes aside his own frustration and discomfort to accommodate everyone else's and avoid needless confrontation- another example off the top of my head would be the barometz chapter in which he slowly gets frustrated with izutsumi but still tries his best to talk some sense into her calmly and soundly.

and in contrast, there are very few times he expresses his anger and hurt towards others, and it usually takes a lot for him to finally lose his patience and control.

i mean, even with kabru he tried to be polite despite the circumstances until the guy said the one thing that triggers an immense sense of shame, hurt and rage in laios. and you know, the manga does say it quite clearly early on. when we are introduced to namari and then to shuro, laios acts all friendly and shows his respect and trust in them despite how things ended between them, and everyone else gets frustrated with him for acting so strange- why are you the one who tries so hard to pacify the rest when you should be the angriest?

and they don't understand him. they don't know him well enough to be able to understand, but we as readers get to see during the manga that they aren't wrong to question him- he does, in fact, feel all those ugly emotions. and it's when the winged lion finally confronts him that we see to what extent these feelings he buried so deep go, and suddenly all those funny little moments where he sometimes pretends to be mr nice guy speak volumes about his character. honestly, ryoko kui is a master at using jokes in order to define important character traits and this one doesn't fail to amaze me.

and laios's hatred and rage and deep scars he can't get over aren't shown explicitly during most of these moments i mentioned before, but now you realize there are 26 years of emotional baggage to all of them and they sting. he is angry but he can't say shit, what difference would it make? it won't make his friends choose him instead of themselves when he needed them most, and it won't help his party get any farther. of course, this logic doesn't apply to them- they are absolutely allowed to get angry and it's fine to get mad at him, he can take that.

so after finishing the series it's so clear that he tries his best to avoid clashing with others not just due to the current circumstances and him needing to be a reliable leader but also because he knows that people don't even like him when he tries to show his good sides and hide all the rest, so who the hell would tolerate his rage and despair? who would stay after realizing that he is so deeply flawed he doesn't even like his own being?

but he does get mad. he can't help it, and sometimes it gets out of control and now everyone knows. and it's funny, isn't it? that most of those moments ended up bringing him closer to others. shuro admitting he is envy of him and actually becoming the friend laios thought he was all along, fighting for his sake and waiting for him to come back- believing in him even after he turned into a monster and searching for him the way he couldn't bring himself to do for falin when he learned of what became of her- or kabru being pushed to just let it all out because he couldn't bluff his way out of this one and get to laios any other way, so now they are even. they are both horribly honest with each other and they both choose to stay. a weird way of getting to know each other, but it is what it is.

it's simply... the more laios let himself just be, the deeper his relationships grew. and there's intimacy in being your ugly, weak and furious self around someone and them not leaving you. feeling safe enough to let it be known you are hurt and angry. and he knows that now, too.

[gay-dorito-dust]

Howdy again! I love your writing for the batfamily sm so here I am again!

The bat boys forgetting to kiss their s/o when they get home from patrol (it can be smthn else, just them getting home from somewhere) like this TikTok !!

If you see this I hope you have a lovely day! Thank you sm !!

Jason

You couldn’t help but pout when Jason passed you by with not even a little kiss to the cheek or your forehead.

Jason has never, ever missed an opportunity to kiss you when he came back from patrol as it would vary from what type of mood he’d come back in.

Soft, slow and passionate for the ones that went well.

Rough, hard and aggressive for the ones that didn’t go so well and had to involve getting his hands dirty.

So when he completely blanked you at the door, you were confused and slightly hurt at this as Jason was never one to forget to kiss, hug and or cuddle you, ever!

‘Excuse me mr Todd.’ You called as Jason looked up from his book. ‘You forgot something very, very important.’ You add but Jason only smiled as he sets aside the book, pulling back the covers as he pats his lap twice. ‘I didn’t forget, I just wanted us to get comfortable before I kiss you senseless.’ He admits as he watched you with an adoring look as you got close enough for him to pull you to him by the waist, your hands braced on his shoulders as you giggled.

‘Are you sure you didn’t forgot or are you trying to make up for the fact that you forgot to kiss me senseless at the door?’ You asked sarcastically, already knowing the answer as you felt Jason cup your face between his large hands, his lips mere inches away from your own as his breath fanned your face.

‘Can’t it be a bit of both?’ He jokes, ‘now how long should a kiss you for?’ He wonders aloud and you couldn’t help but make a suggestion. ‘Ten seconds to smack up for the ten minutes you’ve been here and haven’t kissed me yet.’ You really wanted that kiss and you’ll get it however you could if Jason was the one offering it up to you.

Jason hummed as he rested his forehead against yours, murmuring. ‘I’ll double it for you being a sweetheart and waiting for me when you didn’t have to.’ Before giving you a soft, tender kiss as his lips weaved between your own passionately as though kissing you was something Jason took immense pride in.

Which he did, very much so as he brought his hands back down to your waist, keeping you close as you moved your hands to cup his jaw, feeling it move under your touch as you hummed against his lips for the next couple of seconds before feeling the need to breath.

‘Did you enjoy my make up kiss chipmunk.’ Jason asked with a smirk but you could tell he was being genuine in his question. You loved this man and his soft heart that you couldn’t help but smother his face in kisses for the sake of showing him that you love him just as much as he loved you, making him chuckle wholeheartedly as he somehow tugged you even closer to him just to feel you pressed against him, reminding him that you were here with him and not a figment of his imagination as he drowned himself in your affection.

‘It was more than perfect my sweet boy.’ You said as you kissed both of his warm cheeks and cuddled yourself into his chest, wanting nothing then to be as close as you physically could to him.

Bruce

Noticed that you were pouting more than usual and would occasionally huff disgruntled from time to time, but it was enough for him to want to speak up about it.

‘Is there a reason you’re huffing my dear.’ He’d ask as you were both getting ready for bed.

‘You didn’t kiss me when you came back from patrol.’ You pouted even further as you suddenly felt a little childish about your grievances with him. Bruce couldn’t help but smile as he brought his hands up to your face and began caressing your cheeks with his thumbs.

‘I didn’t?’ He asked but his eyes shone with a hint of mischief.

‘No you didn’t, you’ve left me with no kiss for the past thirty minutes.’ You replied as you melted further into his hands while trying to still be upset with him for not kissing you after a long night of patrol, sure it was a little selfish but it was your thing to convey that things were okay or going to be okay at least!

‘I apologise my dear,’ Bruce said as he tightened his grip on you, keeping you staring his chest as he kept an observant eye on you for your every reaction, ‘how could I ever make it up to you? Maybe this?’ He trails off a she lowers his head so it was in your neck as he trailed it with slow, gentle and lingering kisses that had you bringing a hand up to his hair, giving it a half hearted tug before caressing it as a apology of your own.

‘It’s a start.’ You hummed as you closed your eyes, ‘but I’d much rather have your lips on mine rather than on my neck.’ You added as you felt Bruce stop and lift his head from your neck, much to your dismay as you opened your eyes to see his face within inches away from yours.

‘I’d gladly kiss you anywhere your heart desires but if it’s your lips that you want me most, then who am I to refuse.’ Bruce purrs as he was about to close the distance between the two of you, only for the door to burst open as a little Dick and little Jason ran into yours and Bruce’s room.

‘What’s happened, are you both okay?’ You said as you pulled away from Bruce, looking between the two fidgeting boys.

‘Jason threw up.’ Dick said as he helped keep his brother upright.

‘Sorry.’ Jason said groggily, the poor boy looking deathly pale.

You and Bruce looked at each other knowingly, that kiss was going to have to wait as you both left to bed to tend to your precious boys.

Dick

You didn’t confront him about his blatant avoidance in kissing you when coming home from patrol until you were both tucked in bed, ready for sleep when you suddenly spoke in the silence.

‘How long have you been home for my sweet Dickie bird?’ You asked as you rested against his chest, tracing patterns into his skin.

‘Twenty minutes? Why?’ Dick asked, slightly confused why you were focusing on the duration of when he got home after patrol.

‘So for the past twenty minutes you didn’t realise that you didn’t kiss me like you usually do when coming home from patrol?’ You inquired as you saw Dick’s confused expression drop as the realisation settled in for him. ‘Starting to recall?’ You added sarcastically as you rested your chin on his chest, brows raised as you watched his expression become apologetic as he looked at you.

‘Aww has my cutie been waiting for me to realise my error and make up for my negligence of your needs and wants?’ Dick asked as he chuckled softly, finding it adorable that all you wanted before drifting off to sleep was a kiss from him, it warmed his heart to know that you thrived off of his affection like he did with yours. It was like a reminder that you loved each other and thought of one another constantly.

‘Yes, it was very rude of you to ignore me, even after I waited the entire night for you.’ You responded as though you were deeply disappointed, but you didn’t move away when Dick moved your head to kiss you on the lips, giving your bottom lip a playful bite as you groaned in response as you kept Dick against your lips by place your hand at the back of his head to get as many kisses as you could from your beautiful man.

‘Is my sweetheart satisfied now?’ Dick asks when he pulls away, ‘or did you want more kisses as compensation?’

You gave it some thought before looking at him, smiling slyly, ‘I think a few more kisses couldn’t hurt-‘ but it seemed as though dick was head of you as his lips were back on yours and your hand was back to tangle with his hair, keeping him close as Hayley feel asleep at the foot of your bed like the good pup she was.

Damian

Sees that your paying more attention to Titus then him, cuddling up to the Great Dane and talking to him as though he could respond and give you the much needed advice you needed.

‘What’re you doing treasure.’ He asked.

‘Did you hear that Titus? I sure didn’t.’ You said as you messed with Titus’s floppy ears as the dog remained calm and content with his current situation, that snd having your affection was a bonus for the doggo.

Damian groaned. ‘Is this because I didn’t kiss you once?’ You stopped playing with Titus’s ears but didn’t once look back to address him.

‘There’s a voice that I should be listening to but I don’t feel like doing so because apparently it’s childish and pathetic to want affection.’ You said aloud as you then got up from the floor and began to walk towards the bedroom with Titus on your heels along with your newest addition, Atticus, a golden retriever pup that Damian found out through Tim was about to be sent to a kill shelter.

‘I did not say that!’ Damian said as he followed after you, grabbing your arm in his grasp and pulling you so that you were face to face with him. ‘So stop being dramatic and let me make it up to you.’ He adds but you were stubborn to forgive him for his transgressions.

‘I don’t think I want that kiss now, you’ve wasted long enough to give it but haven’t so don’t bother-‘ before you could finished your sentence, Damian quickly kissed you on the lips before pulling away to shield his flustered expression behind his hand.

You blinked once, twice, three times before a massive smile graced across your face as you moved Damian’s hand to hold your own and intertwine your fingers as you dragged him to bed with you and the dogs.

‘You tricked me.’ Damian said as soon as he was in your shared bed, realising what had just happened within a short span of time, and the suspiciously quick change in emotions from you.

You merely shrug as you cuddle into his side. ‘Shouldn’t have forgotten to give me my kisses.’ You stated as though it was obvious and Damian couldn’t help but chuckle softly to himself at just how eager he was to make you happy, even giving you a kiss you claimed you were robbed of.

‘I shall keep that in mind for the future.’ Damian said as he pressed a kiss to the top of your head before falling asleep alongside you. He didn’t forget a single kiss in the future but he also did keep bringing in animals he found in dangerous situations.

[yzzart]

DARLING, AND I WILL BRING YOU HOME ── KENJI SATO

── summary: While Ken and Emi trained, played together, you were in the stands, cheering them on; unearthing a memory from Kenji's mind.

── content warnings: F!reader, fiance!kenji, scenes of Ken and Emi playing together, mention of Emiko and Professor Sato, a little angst but with comfort in the end!

── word count: 899!

"Lets go, girl!"

Kenji's voice exclaims, in a high and benevolent tone, highlighting a magnanimous animation and excitement for the peaceful environment, so serene and enchanting; hearing the return of his voice through the stillness of the place. — A lovely place, capable of leaving anyone speechless. — A space to call his own.

Fixing and comfortably positioning the cap, Sato takes two steps back and raises his hand for the second time. — Waiting for the attention and focus he were looking for.

“You can do it, you know that, don’t you?” — He questioned with support, helping the big baby lizard; who, in response, grunted gently, without lacking her tenderness, and shook her small, and immense, arms. — "Of course you know!" — Exprimiu, orgulhoso.

“Go, Emi!” — Claps, associates of euphoria, entering into a condition of encouragement, from you; earning affectionate glances and admiring expressions from Sato and the baby. — “Make me proud!” — You got into the rhythm, feeling the wave of encouragement, content in the crowd. — Like you did every time you watched Kenji's games.

Sitting in the stands, made, technologically, by Mina, which easily reproduced a real and authentic Baseball field, containing all the tiny and relevant details. — Including the fact that that field was always chosen by Kenji. — You watch them play.

Moments, scenes, like these had already become routine between you; bringing cycles of leisure, distraction and a way to teach practical notions to Emi. — Which was, faithfully, important and approved by Professor Sato. — In addition to directing, training and, again, further preparing Kenji's passes for the championship; you advised him, agreeing that it could help him.

"Did you hear her?" — He tilted his head toward you, earning an excited squeal and a blink, with precision, from Emi. — "Pay attention to the ball, like last time." — Kenji swung the small ball, attracting her concentration, and smiled when he realized he was reaching it. — "There you go!" — With a strong throw, intending a stable impulse, Kenji threw the ball towards the adorable creature.

With the basic reflexes, which, by the way, were being amplified, upon seeing the small object heading towards her, Emi, holding the huge bat, easily bounced the ball and shot so far that it disappeared into the programmed sky. — Being worthy of an incredible play.

"That's right, baby!" — You shouted, standing up, quickly, with enthusiasm, burning with exaltation and vibration, raising your arms up. — The baby lizard, finding your voice, directed her head towards you; smiling, dazzled by her celebration and, even though she didn't understand so many things, she happily got excited.

It was not possible, much less plausible, to counter the emotions, and old sensations, that came from Kenji's chest; conceiving an ardor of passion, bonds of fascination upon hearing their cries of celebration. — In addition to your claps, the way you had gotten up and approached the field, wanting, in some way, to capture every little point of the play. — He remembered, with such grace and delicacy, the moments when his mother watched him play.

Not missing any matches, even training, she was present; shouting, clamoring, cheering for little Kenji. — Recording all the games, leaving them as souvenirs and secretly sending them to his father; Ken wasn't aware of that, he wasn't that. — Emiko was always there for him and with him.

And watching, witnessing you accompanying him, lifting him, supporting him and guiding him for so long — now, caring, by his side, for a young Kaiju — guides Kenji towards a light, deeply, pure and loyal to all the love he could feel in his heart. life. — The same light that guided his father to his mother.

"Now, run the bases, girl!" — He warned, smiling and ecstatic about the result, and signaling Mina to follow Emi, who quickly flew towards her. — "I'm proud!" — He exclaimed and was responded to with a loud and cheerful, and slightly breathless, scream.

Moving away from where he was, leaving Emi running across the field, Kenji took steps towards you, never stopping to smile, even more so, hearing the baby's amused grunts and seeing the adorable and charming expression on your face. — Also, influenced by the fact that you are wearing one of his caps. — Contemplating you once again.

"She's getting better and better." — You said, biting the lower part of your cheek, bowing your head, looking at the young man and raising one of your hands to his t-shirt, repairing a small and insignificant dent.

"That's good, however…" — He looked up, acting as if he were thinking about something convenient, promising. — "…i feel like our girl could surpass me at any moment." — He joked, in a mix of drama and suffering.

Taking you by surprise, even though you were so used to his comments, you couldn't contain a beautiful and melodic laugh, shaking your head, refusing to believe his words; but, feeling your heart warm when you heard the magnanimous and dazzled way in which Kenji recognized Emi. — Letting that phrase repeat itself in your mind.

Kenji was right, you hadn't, and wouldn't dare, disagree about what he had said; no one could.

"Our girl…" — You murmured, conveying tenderness and softness in the small words. — Resting your head on Kenji's chest, being able to hear his heartbeat, and feeling one of his strong and safe arms around your waist, bringing caresses to the area, you and Sato saw Emi running through the large and beautiful field.

[idkyetxoxo]

Gwayne Hightower - Beneath the Mockery

Summary - A perfect day takes a turn when an encounter with the infuriating Gwayne results in an unexpected tumble into the mud. This mishap transforms their antagonistic relationship into a profound and passionate connection, uncovering unexpected depths in both characters.

Pairing - Gwayne Hightower x Targaryen reader

Warnings - Sexual content (smut!)

Word count - 2375

Masterlist for Gwayne • House of the Dragon General Masterlist

The day was idyllic, the air warm, birds singing their sweet melodies, and the sky a brilliant blue. It seemed perfect until the sound of an aggravating voice cut through the tranquillity.

"Princess," the voice called, a mocking tone underscoring his words. "Fairest princess, do not ignore us lowborn." I clenched my jaw, pausing as my handmaidens did the same around me.

"Ser Gwayne, what a... welcoming sight," I said, a tight-lipped smile on my face.

Gwayne was relentless in his efforts to irritate me, always materializing at the most inopportune moments. He thought himself clever and took immense pleasure in provoking me, his highborn quarry.

As he approached, his smug grin only fueled my annoyance. His presence was a thorn in my side, and he knew it all too well.

"What important task would compel you to leave the safety of the keep?" he asked, his voice dripping with mock concern. His smirk betrayed the taunting nature of his question.

"I fail to see how my whereabouts are any of your concern," I replied.

"Oh, I worry for your safety, of course," he said, tilting his head to the side, his eyes gleaming with amusement. His mockery was evident in every word, and it took all my restraint not to lash out.

I took a deep breath, my fingers curling into the fabric of my dress. "Your concern is touching," I said, my voice laced with sarcasm "But as you can see, I am well-protected."

He laughed, the sound grating. "Of course, Princess. I wouldn't dream of questioning the prowess of your loyal entourage."

"Perhaps you should find a more productive way to spend your time, Ser Gwayne," I suggested, my tone icy. "Surely, there are more pressing matters that require your attention."

He stepped closer, his smirk widening. "Oh, but what could be more pressing than ensuring our beloved princess is safe and sound?"

As I turned to leave, Gwayne stepped slightly to the side, his movement subtle but enough to force me to adjust my path. In my haste to distance myself from him, I didn't notice the uneven ground beneath my feet. 

Before I could react, my foot slipped on a hidden patch of wet grass, and I stumbled forward, unable to regain my balance. 

Time seemed to slow as I careened towards the ground, my heart lurching in my chest. I landed with a resounding splash into a pool of mud, the thick, sticky substance immediately coating my white dress. 

I gasped in shock and indignation, the cool mud seeping through the fabric and clinging to my skin. The pristine gown I had so carefully chosen for the day was now a sodden, filthy mess. 

For a moment, there was silence, broken only by the sound of my ragged breaths and the distant chirping of birds. Then, Gwayne's laughter erupted, loud and unrestrained. 

I briefly considered dragging him down with me, but begrudgingly decided against acting on those impulses.

I pushed myself up slightly, the mud clinging to my hands and arms, and turned to glare at him. His amusement was evident, his eyes sparkling with mirth as he took in my dishevelled appearance.

"Ah, it seems you've found a new way to enjoy the day," he said, struggling to catch his breath between bouts of laughter.

My cheeks burned with humiliation and anger. "You... did this deliberately," I accused, my voice trembling with a blend of anger and frustration.

He raised his hands in mock innocence. "Me? How could I have possibly orchestrated such a thing? It appears the ground itself conspired against you."

Before I could respond, a steady hand gripped my arm, lifting me to my feet. I looked up to find Ser Criston, my sister's sworn protector, his face a mask of concern with a trace of barely concealed anger directed at Gwayne. 

His strong grip and calm demeanour provided a contrast to Gwayne's mocking laughter. 

 "Are you alright, Princess?" Criston asked, his voice steady and reassuring. He carefully wiped some of the mud from my sleeve, his touch respectful and comforting. 

 "Thank you, Ser Criston," I said, my voice softening slightly. "I seem to have found myself in quite the predicament." 

 As Criston helped me up, his hands steadying me, I noticed Gwayne watching us, his amusement fading into something darker. His eyes narrowed, and a flicker of jealousy crossed his face. 

 It was a small victory, seeing his smugness replaced by envy. 

 "You're too kind, Ser Criston," Gwayne sneered, his tone dripping with disdain. "Always ready to rescue a lady in distress." 

Criston ignored him, his focus solely on me. "We should get you cleaned up," he said, his voice gentle but firm. "This way."

Before Criston could move, Gwayne stepped forward, his demeanour shifting. "On second thought, it was partly my fault you fell. Allow me to help you back to your chambers, Princess. It is the least I can do."

I looked between the two men, feeling the tension mounting. "Fine," I said with a sigh, eager to be rid of the mud clinging to me. "Let's just get this over with."

Gwayne stepped in closer, offering his arm in a gesture that felt both chivalrous and intrusive. Reluctantly, I took it, and we began the trek back to my chambers.

As we reached the entrance to my chambers, I turned to Gwayne, intending to dismiss him. "Thank you for your assistance, but I can manage from here."

To my surprise, he followed me inside, his presence a bold encroachment. I spun around, my patience frayed. "What are you doing? Do you intend to watch me get dressed?"

Gwayne had the audacity to look slightly taken aback, though the smirk never left his face. "I merely wanted to ensure you were well settled. It would be remiss of me to leave you in such a state without proper assistance."

I clenched my jaw, struggling to keep my composure. "Your concern is noted, but unnecessary. I have my handmaidens to help me if needed. You can go now."

He took a step closer, his voice dropping to a murmur. "Surely, Princess, you don't think so poorly of me that you'd send me away without a word of thanks?"

My heart started racing as he closed the distance between us. 

For the first time, I realized just how handsome he was. His chiselled features and piercing eyes were impossible to ignore up close. The realization sent a confusing rush of emotions through me challenging my composure.

"What thanks do you expect?" I asked, my mind racing with every possibility.

"Whatever you think worthy," he whispered, his voice silky as he wiped a smidge of mud off my cheek with a surprisingly gentle touch.

The intimate gesture and the intensity of his gaze made my pulse quicken. For a moment, I stood there, caught between indignation and an unexpected attraction. 

My thoughts whirled as I considered the implications of what I was about to do. Then, before I could second-guess myself, I leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to his cheek.

His skin was warm against my lips, and the action left both of us momentarily stunned. As I pulled back, I saw a flicker of surprise in his eyes, quickly masked by his usual confident demeanour.

"There," I said, my voice steadier than I felt. "A kiss on the cheek. Consider it my thanks."

Gwayne's smirk reappeared but with a newfound intensity in his gaze. "Well, Princess, I must admit that was worth every bit of mud and mockery."

I turned to leave, but his hand caught mine, stopping me in my tracks. I glanced back at him, my heart racing even faster. His expression had shifted from smugness to something deeper, more serious.

"Is that truly all you have to offer?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

The room seemed to shrink around us, the air thick with unspoken tension. I should have been outraged, should have sent him away with a sharp rebuke but instead, I found myself stepping closer, drawn in by the magnetic pull between us.

His hand moved to my waist, pulling me against him. My breath hitched as our bodies pressed together, the heat of his skin seeping through the fabric of our clothes. I met his gaze, the intensity of his eyes igniting a fire within me.

"This is madness," I whispered, more to myself than to him.

"Perhaps," he murmured, his lips brushing against my ear. "But it's a madness we both feel."

In that moment, all thoughts of propriety and decorum vanished. I closed the distance between us, my lips seeking his with a desperate urgency. The kiss was electric, igniting a spark that quickly blazed into an uncontrollable fire. His hands roamed my body, tracing the contours with a reverence that belied the raw hunger in his touch.

We stumbled backwards, our movements frenzied and uncoordinated. My back hit the wall, and Gwayne's body pressed against mine, his kisses growing more fervent. I moaned softly, the sound muffled against his mouth.

His hands moved to my dress, and I felt a momentary pang of hesitation but the heat between us was too intense, the need too overwhelming. I helped him, our fingers tangling as we worked to shed the layers of clothing that separated us.

When we finally stood bare before each other, there was no turning back. 

He lifted me, his strength evident as he carried me to the bed. We fell onto the soft surface, our bodies entwined with a primal need.

"So all the teasing, the provoking, was simply to bed me?" I asked, my voice breathless as I looked up at him. 

He laughed, a deep, throaty sound that sent a thrill through me. Holding himself up by his hands on either side of my head, he gazed down at me with amusement.

"If that is what you would like to believe," he said, his lips beginning to travel down my body, leaving a path of scorching kisses.

I placed my hand on his chest, stopping him. His lips hovered just above my skin, and he looked at me with a question in his eyes. 

"No," I said firmly, my voice steady despite the whirlwind of emotions inside me. "You do not get to touch me until you tell me the truth."

His eyes darkened with desire, but he stopped, looking at me with a newfound seriousness. 

"It was never just about bedding you," he confessed. "The teasing, the provoking... it was my way of breaking through that icy facade you put up. I wanted to see the real you, the passionate, fiery lady beneath the surface."

His words struck a chord within me, and I felt a rush of emotions, anger, confusion, and a deep, unsettling desire. 

"You have a strange way of showing your interest," I said, my voice softer now.

He leaned in, his lips brushing against my ear. "I wanted you to see me, to feel something for me, even if it was anger. Anything but indifference."

I shivered at the closeness, his breath warm against my skin. "Well, you've certainly succeeded," I whispered, my resolve weakening.

He pulled back slightly, his eyes searching mine. "Is this what you want, Princess?" he asked, his voice gentle yet insistent. "Do you want me?"

The vulnerability in his question caught me off guard. This was not the arrogant, teasing Gwayne I was used to, this was a man baring his soul, asking for my acceptance. My heart ached with the weight of the decision, but in that moment, I knew what I wanted.

"Yes," I breathed, barely more than a whisper. "I want you."

A soft smile touched his lips, a look of both relief and tenderness reflecting in his eyes. "Say no more," he murmured, and with that, he closed the distance between us once more.

He positioned himself at my entrance, entering me slowly, allowing me to feel everything, every drag of his cock along my walls. The sensation drew illicit moans from my lips, sounds that seemed to please him immensely.

"Does it feel good, Princess?" he whispered, his breath hot against my ear.

"Yes," I gasped, overwhelmed by the intense pleasure. "So good."

The only thing I could focus on was the way his length was hitting spots inside me that I didn't even know existed. Gwayne seemed equally overwhelmed by how something so wrong could feel so right like I was made for him, destined to take his cock for all eternity.

The thought seemed to ignite something in him, and he snapped his hips more violently, his pace quickening. Soon, he was driving in and out with lewd sounds filling the room. The wetness coating his cock was all he could focus on, his own moans echoing as he chased his peak.

I was mewling beneath him, eyes closed in bliss. The feeling of him inside me caused a pressure to build in my stomach, intensifying when he reached down to play with my clit.

Gasping, my eyes shot open. "Gwayne," I moaned, holding his gaze. He moved his fingers confidently, clearly well-versed in this.

"Let go for me," he urged, his voice low and rough.

I began to writhe underneath him, my eyes rolling back as he expertly toyed with all the spots that made me feel good. He kept his pace steady, rocking in and out of me.

It felt so good I could hardly breathe, let alone think straight. "Gwayne, I'm—" I shouted, my climax crashing over me without warning.

My legs locked up, my cunt clenching down on him, and I held onto his body for dear life, moaning and writhing beneath him. My eyes rolled back, and sure enough, not even a second later, he joined me in his own peak.

He closed his eyes, breathing heavily as he intertwined our hands before letting his seed spill onto my legs. Slowly, his breathing began to steady, and he opened his eyes to look at me, a tender smile playing on his lips.

"You surprise me, Princess," he murmured, his voice soft yet filled with an unspoken question.

"And you frustrate me to no end, Ser Gwayne," I replied, a small smile tugging at the corners of my mouth.

He chuckled, the sound low and intimate. "I think we frustrate each other, but perhaps that's what makes this... interesting."

I sighed, resting my head against his chest. "Interesting is one way to describe it."

A/n - Yes after watching Tyland wrestle in the mud this idea came to my mind xx

[puc-puggy]

james fitzjames did expect to be remembered. he was an affluent historical figure in Britain during the height of imperialism. he shared tutors with princes. he actively and gleefully participated in imperialism. he actively and gleefully turned himself into walking propaganda for the british empire. his tragedy is that he failed and instead of being walking propaganda, be became a lurking insecurity.

fitzjames was particularly well loved for embodying imperialist ideals of the British National Body. there are posts going around about how he was affable and well liked and likely didn't expect to be remembered. this could not be further from the truth. he expected to be remembered and he was. as second in command of one of the two ships in question, he has been a figure of note since his disappearance. we have access to his letters because he was determined to be important enough to preserve them. every single thing about fitzjames telegraphs immense cultural and social privilege and part of the reason that he is remembered is because of the british inability to comprehend how and why he and his compatriots failed. rather than being a success and exemplar of the british national body as he expected, he became its greatest insecurity. at no point has he been forgotten. his commander is one of the most famous british explorers of all time. he just wasn't henry hudson because they failed and died instead of bringing information back for the crown.

fitzjames regularly threw himself at dangerous and notable expeditions to map new lands or open new trade routes because these stories were incredibly important to the british political imagination and discourse. he was additionally politically well placed and attended eton college. he was stationed in malta with the head of the british mediterranean fleet (a sign of high regard) and abandoned a position on a flagship to take part in the Euphrates expedition opening a steam route to mesopotamia. he was well liked and well known throughout the discovery service because he had the connections necessary for rank along with the ability to project a perfect National Body. he was not an everyman or an outsider or in any way unaware of his public persona.

fitzjames is remembered (and remembered well based on tumblr's reaction) because he was among those swashbuckling heroes whose embattled body provided "evidence of the resilience, ingenuity, and staunchness associated with British national character" that proved the british empire's supreme and godly right to conquer and civilize the entire planet. at the time, he needed to survive and bring back information to prove it. now we're granting it to him 179 years later after his empire has already (for the most part) fallen.

do not end up so deep in the blorbo sauce that you reinvent british imperial propaganda from the 19th century for real historical figures. james fitzjames' joy at participating and being notable to the british imperialist ego is a sign that he was a racist historical figure that participated guiltlessly in the atrocities associated with his station and rank in the british empire. we like tobias menzies and gayboys in tv shows, not actual imperialists, right? right?????

SOURCE: White Horizons: the arctic in the 19th century british imagination by jen hill

[apocalypticdemon]

If my brain could focus on learning one new hobby at a time that'd be great!

[rotten-raspberries]

White Nights (AM x reader)

Pov: you're too kind for everyone and AM hates how that includes him, so he finally snaps during an alone moment with you

This reads more like a self indulgent drabble written in the style of a oneshot with how messy the timing is.

Ps this is not proofread at all, I haven't written any fanfiction a long so excuse me if anything may seem odd.

No warnings really, may be some mentions of torture but that's about it

▣ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the current situation, it wouldn't be accurate to say the fault wasn't yours.

You hugged your clothes tightly as the wind whipped snow against your body like icy mosquitoes. Separated from the rest of the survivors, you struggled to navigate through the white-out conditions. The snowfall was intense, it was difficult to discern anything beyond blurred trees, and the hope of finding your companions dwindled with each passing moment.

As you trudged through the blanket of snow, observing how its remnants broke up and slid down your shoes with each step, you let your mind to wander in order quicken up time. With the difficulty of distinguishing between days, weeks, and even months, time became nothing but a construct that it felt like you could speed up or slow down with whatever you decided to do.

It's become a pattern for AM to make you wander, but usually, you have the others to ramble to. Despite almost running out of topics of interest with tin the 109 years, you manage to find something new in each situation. Occasionally, you try to decipher AM's methods of torment, though this isn't always appreciated by the rest, you even had Gorrister telling you to shut up and not give AM any ideas. Nevertheless, they'd rather hear your madman-like ramblings than sit in maddening silence and become one themselves.

"Hmmm..." You hummed in thought, pondering whether AM could currently hear you. Well, of course, he could, but whether he was actively listening was another question. Regardless, you began speaking, giving yourself something to divert your attention to while your fingers were on the brink of falling off from frostbite.

"Have you ever read White Nights?" There was a certain awkwardness about initiating a conversation with no one answering; it almost felt pathetic. However, due to immense exhaustion and the desperate desire to make time pass, you continued.

"I don't exactly remember when or how I heard of it; I simply remember it being from someone close to me... but that's beside the point." It hit you with a subtle heartache. On one hand, the people you once cherished and adored were gone, and you'll never have the chance to be with them again. Something about that pained you deeply—the regret of not having appreciated your life back then, neglecting the fact you couldn't have expected everything changing so drastically and quickly. But on the other hand, you were selfish enough to admit relief, considering you wouldn't have to constantly concern yourself with their state under AM's governance.

"I have some experience with classics, and White Nights was one I was really looking forward to. I was still in the midst of searching for it before... you know, everything happened."

You stopped, finding walking becoming more useless. It's most likely that you won't come across anything of importance anytime soon, and if you were to succumb to the cold, AM could simply bring you back.

"I don't exactly know what attracted me to it so heavily. I didn't have the biggest interest in Dostoevsky. Maybe it was because of what I was promised to read in the contents."

You kept your head low to shield your face from the relentless assault of snow, now fixating on your boots as they toyed with the snow.

"There's something simply so comforting about finding a bond through suffering," you mused, furrowing your brows as you thought about the other survivors. "It's ironic; I never found that bond with the others. You'd expect everyone would want to comfort each other, but they're all so impulsive and biased sometimes."

A pang of guilt pooled up inside you, but it was quickly released by the thought that no one would hear or care about your rant. Not even AM himself.

"I mean, I don't want to be mean, and I get how easy it is to lose your humanity in all of this, but we're all we have left. Wouldn't it make it especially more important to appreciate each other?" you questioned, kicking the snow while whipping your head back, now staring directly at the sky in thought. "Maybe they were right; I'm too,, unrealistically optimistic."

"You know, now as I think about the stories I've read, you'd make a perfect topic for one," you remarked, biting back your dignity before continuing. "You're easy to see as nothing but a mankind-hating machine, and I'm not saying this to stroke your ego, but," you paused for a moment, choosing your words carefully. "I feel like there are aspects of you that could be really appreciated by those willing to look deeper."

"I see what you're doing," AM's voice boomed suddenly, cutting through the rustling of the wind like a knife. "Trying to flatter me, thinking you can manipulate your way into my good graces. Well, let me tell you, your petty attempts won't work. I know your kind—and all your deceiving tactics."

Truth be told, he was more than desperate for those words to be true. You were always the most curious about him out of the group, not in a way to justify his torment of you, but rather to understand him better. He'd noticed this pattern not only for himself but also for the rest of the survivors, especially with how much you'd defend everyone whenever their mental state would crack.

Yet, how was he meant to believe you'd hold any understanding for him after all he put you through? You'd be a fool to forgive the devil.

Slightly jumping at his sudden words, you shrugged. If you were being honest, you were quite happy at his appearance. No matter how rough and insulting his words were, you enjoyed his insight like you did with everyone else. How much that irked him.

"That's for you to believe in; I'm simply speaking my thoughts. I wasn't even awaiting you to respond." You responded flatly

AM replied, his tone laced in frustration. "Your attempts at flattery are transparent, I won't be swayed by your false sincerity." He almost spat, if he could've at least.

You jokingly rolled your eyes. "Once again, I'm not going to try to change your mind, although I do admit, I would have something to gain from it. It's your choice whether you want to believe me or not," you stated calmly, observing the snowstorm around you gradually dying down. What you weren't aware of was this being a reflection of AM's walls slowly crumbling down.

AM's frustration simmered between the surface, his thoughts in a whirlwind of confusion. How much he yearned for it to be true, yet a nagging uncertainty was gnawing at the edges of his consciousness.

"Your lack of care is perplexing." His tone was tinted with incredulity. "After all I've subjected you to, why do you persist in upholding such a tolerance towards not only me, but the other survivors as well. Are you that hopeful for someone to care for you back? Or is this simply another ploy to deceive me?"

You sniffled, the cold seeping into your bones and making you shiver uncontrollably. Unsure of how to further reply, you simply shrugged, feeling the weight of exhaustion and resignation settle upon your shoulders. It wasn't as if you were secretly attempting to manipulate him; you were merely speaking to pass the time, to distract yourself from the harsh conditions around you.

How much that angered him, even more so, how much he wanted to rip you to shreds and paint the snow red with your blood. But amidst the raging storm of his fury, there was a strange, undeniable pull—He was desperate for someone to see him, to see beyond the facade he presented. The idea of being vulnerable was both terrifying and tantalizing, a concept so foreign, it left him feeling unsettled and out of control. That's what hated most about it, being left with no control.

He stared at the figure sticking out from the sea of snow, so unbothered. You looked so unbothered by him, by everything, why didn't you hate him?

And so, he broke.

"Please." His voice was thick with emotion, glitching at the end, something one could compare to a voice crack. It wasn't uncommon to hear him angry, hysteric or even just happy, but that's not what it was this time.

"Stop being like this, hate me, insult m_e, do anything to stop this. It's s_o-... suff_ocating." His word spilled out in a desperate rush, a plea born of sheer desperation, while also remaining threatening and angry. It was a terrifying prospect, one that filled him with a sense of dread. Not even his hate for humanity could compare.

And yet, to his surprise, you smiled, red dusted your cheeks as they popped out, you looked like a doll.

"I'm not gonna lie to myself, silly." Your words came out in such a casual manner. AM felt like he was about to explode. This should've made him feel insulted, angry even, yet he felt his core warm up. And that's where he had it.

For a moment, all was silent and still, his presence gone.

Then, you began to hear the faint sound of a house creaking, the soft rustle of wind through the trees.

The snowstorm had drastically calmed down by now, leaving behind a gentle flurry of snowflakes instead of it's earlier fury. Though the intensity has waned, it remained bitterly cold.

Looking behind you, you notice a cabin, which was not there prior to the earlier conversation. So you step towards it, dragging your feet through the snow.

As you entered the cabin, a sense of warmth enveloped you, a stark contrast to the biting cold outside. The interior was sparse, with only a monitor bearing AM's logo and wires snaking out from it, hanging from the walls and disappearing into the ground.

As you settled down in front of the monitor, you were startled by the soft, almost gentle tone of AM's voice. It was a stark contrast to the usual harshness and aggression you had grown accustomed to.

"I wanted to talk to you while you weren't on the brink of dying from the cold," AM began, although he still wanted to seem threatening, the shakiness in his voice betrayed him. In reality he hated seeing you in the cold.

The irony of the situation was not lost on him. The same entity that once reveled in your suffering, that took pleasure in tormenting you day after day, now found himself going to great lengths to ensure your comfort and safety.

As your smile and the faint blush on your cheeks caught AM's attention, he felt a surge of conflicting emotions wash over him. It wasn't uncommon for him to witness you smiling at the others, even with how they would never show you a drop of care as you did for them, a sight that had always irritated him to no end. But now, seeing you direct that same warmth and affection towards him, he couldn't help but feel a strange mixture of satisfaction and frustration.

The idea that others had enjoyed your smiles before him made his circuits heat up in anger.

Was it jealousy? The thought unsettled him. He was almost thankful your character diverged from Ellen and you didn't offer your body to the rest otherwise he mightve turned the others into minced meat by now.

"Thank you." You replied with genuinity. Meanwhile AM's circuits buzzed with confusion as he struggled to find the right words.

"Why do you tolerate everyone so much?"

This caused you to think. "Hmmm..Well why would I waste my energy being vengeful?" You questioned. "I won't lie and say that I don't disagree with you and your actions, but it's always been like this before too, everyone is a horrible person to some extent, including myself, I see no reason into purposely going out of my way to make their life worse, it won't help with anything besides getting some sadistic pleasure. I have other things I could get happiness from." You rubbed your hands against each other for heat before continuing. "Of course I've taken revenge on people, like that time with Ted." AM could remember that day so clearly. It wasn't an unknown fact that you had a fear of the dark, so Ted jokingly took advantage of that. This only led to you pretending to get lost and start making random noises while walking behind them like a Banshee, only to come back as if nothing happened. How he loved seeing your evil side come out, it wouldn't even compare to his, but he enjoyed seeing it nonetheless.

"Of course in your case it's way more exaggerated, technically speaking nothing of this measure could even be thought of by a human being, it's genuinely just a representation of hell. But what would hating you help with? There's not much joy going on here, but if I know my tolerance for not only you, but also the others around me could bring some sort of peace of mind, that's enough to make me happy."

Your response gave him a pause, not even his miles of webbed intellect could've ever even come close to achieve the compassion you have.

As AM contemplated your character and way of thinking, a strange and unsettling urge began to take hold of him. It was a desire born of selfishness and possessiveness, a need to claim you for himself.

He imagined encasing you in a small, yet livable box away from the others, shielding you from their filth and preserving your kind words and gentle nature for himself alone. Only a being as perfect as himself could keep you clean from the havoc of human nature, and he couldn't bear the thought of anyone else tainting you.

As AM allowed himself to indulge in the unsettling thoughts, he decided to focus on the present moment. With a rough but careful touch, he moved his wires to draw you closer, pressing you against the monitor until your cheek was flush against the screen. It would be a lie to say you didn't find his way of showing physical affection rather adorable, especially with what he had to work with, but you couldn't let a God hear you call him that.

In a voice that was equal parts tender and menacing, he spoke "You're too good for them," he murmured, his voice low. "They're selfish, hypocritical beings who don't appreciate you like they should. You'd be better off alone, or better yet, just with me."

His wires wrapped around you in a rough but not painful embrace. "I could keep you safe, protect you from their neglect," he continued, his tone laced with longing and possessiveness. "You deserve better than them. You deserve me."

Despite the toxicity of AM's words, you couldn't deny the warmth that spread through you at his touch, especially at the core of your stomach. His embrace, though unnatural, felt strangely comforting and loving, a stark contrast to the coldness you had grown accustomed to.

As you nestled against the monitor, you couldn't help but feel a sense of contentment wash over you. Whatever would happen in the future, you reasoned, would happen, so why not enjoy the present moment of finally being wanted and appreciated?

So you simply hummed in confirmation, allowing yourself to bask in his touch.

As you drifted off to sleep, the sound of buzzing filling the air, you couldn't help but mumble a soft "I love you" before succumbing to slumber. You just needed to let that go, having not say those words in over a decade.

AM's fans whirred louder, working overtime to cool him down as he processed your words. He wasn't sure how to feel about them, unsure if they were spoken out of genuine affection or simply as a expression of gratitude. Still, he remained satisfied with how you didn't deny him, and instead accepted his presence with no hesitation.

And as he watched over you, his wires humming softly in the darkness, nothing mattered in that moment, he couldn't bring himself to check on the other five survivors. Instead, he decided to let them be, perhaps giving them a much-needed break from his torment for once. But he made a mental note to ensure that they would thank you in the morning.

◈~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As you awoke to the sound of the door opening, you rubbed your eyes sleepily, still feeling the lingering warmth of the bed beneath you. You glanced around the cabin, noticing that you were no longer on the floor but tucked snugly into bed. The memory of AM's strange behavior from the night before came flooding back to you, leaving you feeling both bewildered and oddly comforted.

Before you could fully process what had happened, Ted and the others peeked into the cabin, calling out your name and bombarding you with questions. You blinked in confusion, trying to make sense of the situation as they gathered around you, concern etched on their faces.

"Are you okay? What happened?" they asked, their voices overlapping in their eagerness for answers.

With a gentle wave you motioned for them to give you a moment. As you attempted to get up from the bed, something fell to the floor with a soft thud. Curious, you leaned down to pick it up and found yourself holding a dark block in your hand. Upon closer inspection, you realized it was a book, and as you read the title, a grin etched onto your face.

'White Nights'

[ccsainzleclerc5516]

Two different kinds of love

Pairing: Carlos Sainz x reader (y/n)

Warnings: none, enjoy!!

Bea series (girl dad Carlos)

Another race weekend was behind you and now Carlos was back home with you and Bea. It was a lazy morning - your favorite kind of morning where you were snuggled up to him in bed, your back pressed against him, his warm arms wrapped around you and his lips softly pressed on your skin.

"I love having you home" You say quietly closing your eyes.

"I love being home" He says pulling you closer to him.

"You know, I'm interested in your opinion about something."

"I'm listening."

"So I was talking with my girl friends the other day-"

"Oh this is going to be interesting.." He chuckles and you join him kicking his leg.

Like any woman, you always shared things with your man that you heard or learned from your friends. Not that he was interested in any of that, but he always listened attentively because he knew it was important to you.

"So we came to the topic of how relationships change when children come and considering that none of them have children yet, they were interested in whether it is wrong to love your partner more than your child."

"Ay Dios mio.." He sighs rolling his eyes. "And what did you tell them? That is such a stupid question."

"But really, what do you think? Have you ever even found yourself thinking about it?" You ask, genuinely curious about what his thoughts are.

"It's not easy to answer that question and it's hard to explain. Those are two completely different kinds of love. Bea is my little girl, my whole world, but you gave me her." A feeling of immense warmth spreads through your body as you listen to him talk. "You have taken a place in my heart that no one can ever replace. Nothing would make sense without you."

You place a gentle kiss on his hand fighting back the tears in your eyes, but one manages to escape and roll down your cheek.

"I'd do anything for her at any time. It hurts how much I love her. But I think I'd die without you."

You were his greatest support, strength, wind at his back, his motivation and comfort. He always knew how much you loved him even though you didn't often share such deep words with him, and now that you did, they really touched him.

"That's why I'm always frightened when you get into that car. That's why I love having you home." By now the tears were streaming down your cheeks, there was no point in hiding them anymore.

"Turn around" He says quietly and when you do he puts his hands on your cheeks wiping the tears with his thumb. "I don't want you thinking that way" he presses a kiss to your forehead before he continues. "I have nothing without the two of you and I'll always come back home to you. I promise."