#imagine they go there n theres just 7 other weird old people n all the rehab folks theyve convinced

[toerrishumansodontbeone]

man the visit wouldve been so much more fun if they actually WERE the grandparents and its just that in the 15 years the mom hasnt seen them theyve gotten REALLY into this weird alien cult/created it.

[mysmedrabbles]

RFA Boys with Kids (Elementary School MC Works at Edition)

requested: by anonymous (with special request to make jumins the most prominent its not my fault for once guys!!!)

a/n: i think in 4th grade we had an astrologist come to our class and talk about the moon and stuff and he was terrifying cuz he sat on my desk the whole time but it was super cool and talked about the world imploding!!

if you want to support my fluff writing, buy me a coffee!

warnings: hhhh flüüf

-happy! mod alex

Jumin

-It was your guys’ 3 year anniversary, and Jumin insisted on picking you up directly after work, eager to spend every second of the next 96 hours with you, especially since you Insisted on going to work, unable to leave your precious second graders with a substitute, especially not on the last day before spring break!!!

-he’d always avoided going to your school, not because he hated kids he just... feared them.

-yes, Jumin Han, director of C+R Internationals only fear was jam-handed children. dont get me wrong, it wants a fear as in “run away screaming,” more he was afraid that anyone under the age of 10 would be intimidated and cry when he spoke. the rfa already made enough fun of him, he didn't need more rejection in his life

-sadly (for him, luckily for us), he forgot the time you got out of school, ending upside your classroom about two hours earlier

-he stops dead in his tracks, hand stopped midway to a knock as a bouquet of roses hid behind his back as he looks at the 20 or so 7 year olds staring at him with bright questioning eyes

-he tries to escape and back out of the class before you notice him, but you immediately see him, face lighting up as you bound towards him happily, throwing your arms around him, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek before pulling him into the class, introducing him as your husband 

-a part of him likes that, the idea of not having to be “CEO” or “Mr. Han,” simply your husband

-he’s fairly awkward especially seeing as he’s so tall compare to these little Jam-Handed Monsters?? ... maybe they weren’t monsters... they were kind of cute actually...

-when you take out all the flowers from the bouquet, giving each student a flower instead, he can feel his heart melting, the first smile forming at the corners of his mouth as he sees you so bright and happy, and the way you rect upon seeing the kids own smiles

- “Everyone say Thank You Mr. Han!”     followed by a chorus of “Thank you Mr.Han!!!)

-he wants to protect all these kids from all the bad in the world

-luckily, he came in time for story time, and after you slyly suggest him being the other reader, the expectant and loud children agreeing with you made him do it, doing silly cartoon voices for the characters he portrayed

-Jumin sitting on the Elementary School Rug, the one with the alphabet and boxed colours on it where everyone should sit, his expensive $700 suit wrinkling as he tries his best to kneel down and be to the kids level

-theyre not as scary as he thought! and every time he saw them really... it filled him with a sense of protectiveness he didn’t know he had for anyone outside of his immediate family 

- “MC... lets start a family together” 

Yoosung

-he came over for career day! being a successful vet straight out of college took skills, hence the idea that he come around to the school

-he’s really sweet with the kids, and laughs awkwardly when they ask about his and your relationship, getting flustered and immediately switching the topic to something cute Lisa did

-he can’t spend a lot of time with them because he has to get back to the office, but he also doesn’t spend a lot of time on lecturing them on his job, opting to do some colouring pages with them instead

-shy bean, he’s not necessarily the one to jump into action with them, (lets be honest, second graders are terrifying), but the class likes him, and sometimes he brings Lisa around, which blows their minds

-he’s kind, and being in the presence of Lisa he suddenly becomes so comfortable, smile forming on his face as he teaches a particularly curious girl how to properly respect a cats space, violet eyes brightening up immediately with pure joy

-supportive, and bb kit doesn’t seem to mind, even getting comfortable on some of the kids backpacks

-they all love his white lab coat, and take turns trying it on

-he almost dies of cute overload when on boy holds up his arms proudly, letting the (way too large) sleeves of the coat drop to the floor as he grins widely 

Seven

-volunteers for Everything

-field trip in need of chaperones? special school events need volunteers? kids birthdays? he’s there for all of them no matter what

-he loves being present with them, a part of him feeling healed as he gets to have a glimpse of a childhood he never had, the future he would want his children to have some day

-no matter how silly it may seem, he’s the type to sit with a crying kid until theyre smiling and feeling better, telling the child little jokes and stories until they feel better, making sure to listen to their issue and support them, making sure that they know that their feelings are valid.

-everyone loves Seven in your class! he’s become a cryptid in the school, as the only people that ever actually see him is your class, and no one in the other classes is going to believe the story that theres a red-headed man with funky glasses bringing cupcakes for everyone 

-he tells the most embarrassing stories about you to the kids, reveling in your embarrassment 

-he gets more sad than anyone else when the school year is over, having gotten very attached to your class, where he almost cries as he wishes them a good summer

Zen

-the first time he visited your school was when you’d forgotten your lunch at home, only dropping a sweet hello to the class as he rushes to work

-he doesn’t initially has plans to come back, but a certain few students had become completely enraptured by Zens presence, and wanted to know when the “pretty weird eyed man” would be back

-he loves coming to your school, always conducting fun sing-a-longs as 20 or so 7 year olds gather around him

-having him in the class is more of a disruption, someone who’s fun to hang out with and with him, you know that no one’s going to be doing any work no matter what you say

-more than anything, he loves how the two of you will team up to help a students problem, and sometimes,, if he blocks out the rest of the world... he can imagine that that’s your child

-he’s got insane paternal instincts, and Will Not Stand For anyone getting hurt

-being at the school and seeing you at work and being around children.. really makes him crave that sense of family, building a family with you, the love of his life and being,,, well, happy.

-he lets the children play with and braid his hair, letting them even put flowers in it if they want

-a big ole softie, just wants to know everyone is happy

[whatevenismyaestheticidk]

Things I’ve heard high schoolers say pt 3

Person: it’s to early for me to be alive right now

Teacher: who invented math? Student: Lincoln.

Teacher: You feel as if you get low marks on this 5 paragraph essay you’ll end up poor and homeless and addicted to drugs. Student 1: Yes. Student 2: That’s exactly how it works. Student 3: I mean… you’re not wrong.

Student: It’s called panic and I do it well. I do it very well.

Student 1: I need to get glasses. Student 2: I need to get a will to live.

Student: Physics eats brains for lunch and sucks ass for dinner.

Student: Fuck you Perry the platypus!!

Student: he’s an Asian white supremisist. How does that even happen.

Teacher: After treating him like dirt for 7 years what is he to me? Student 1: Friends? Student 2: Lovers?

Teachers: We can’t have poor people running the place, that’s stupid.

Teachers: It was illegal to be alone because when you are alone you commit a sin.

Student: They play with your intestines? Like jumprope???

Student 1: you make me want to kill myself Student 2: Bitch please! I’ve been making myself want to kill myself for years.

Teacher: If you’re in my class don’t be acting the fool

Student: that’s it! You’ve lost your titty privileges

Student: I have the bladder of an octopus please let me go to the bathroom

Teacher: America broke up with Britain through text and by telling all of their friends but not actually telling Britain.

Student: my peripheral vision up is about as good as a fucking snail’s.

Student: I am allergic to myself.

Student: she brought my coconut juice. I’m going to cry.

Student: my name is Bitch.

Student: my elevator is literally a vsco girl

Student 1: what do you think? Student 2: I think I’m a fucking slut.

Student 1: I look like a lightbulb Student 2: A cute lightbulb. 10/10 would screw you (in)

Teacher: No one likes Axe, but its your friend.

Student: I am a flaming homosexual and that is why I want to dye my hair pink in honor of the women that I love so much

Student: oh my god it’s Michael fucking Jackson! *screams*

Student: Im 16 but not even very much 16.

Teacher: Theres a reason my cousin Neil trades three shifts of paramedic work so he doesn’t have to work on the night of the full moon.

Student: I know it sounds scary running from the police but it’s actually just leisurely walking away from them.

Student: I was washing my hands after lunch and this guy just started bleeding out next to me.

Student: I’m just saying, I would wear a full out prom dress to school and no one could stop me.

Student: I have the strength of a roasted peanut.

Student 1: Avacodo’s are thicc though. If there was a sexiest food event then avocado would win hands down. Student 2: what about peaches Student1: I would 100% fuck an avocado.

Student: chicken nuggets re the dad bod of the food world.

Student: in conclusion: gay.

Student: Hey Mr (Teacher) can you please elaborate on your outfit choice today?

Teacher: Dueling? You know the 10 paces fire? The thing that Hamilton is known for but he was a lot better at?

Teacher: Dreams are kinda wack Student: But this is another level of wack.

Student 1: Im just saying you could totally suck a dick by mistake. Student 2: How? Student 1: Like if you’re watching a movie and he’s holding a soda bottle between his legs and you want a sip but it’s dark you could totally accidentally suck a dick.

Student 1: hurry the fuck up Student 2: that is not how you treat people, you need to have some respect. You say PLEASE hurry the fuck up.

Student: You know, Stockholm syndromes. Like when someone is kidnapped and then catches feelings for their master, daddy kinks, that kinda shit.

Student: IF I were to eat Donalt Trump’s ass it would be so white I’d get retinal cancer just from looking at it.

Student: You were texting her which made us loose the quizlet live game! She is a whore!

Teacher: you’re a dirty old man, you read the script

Student: you’re my hwb. Homies with benefits.

Student 1: I’m a shell 2: I’m a crab. 3: what do crabs do to shells 2: I’m going to go live and eat inside you then eventually leave you for another

Student: Ayyyy!! We’re getting mono!!

Student: Stop catching feelings you dumb emotionally suicidal bitch!!!!

Teacher: *Student’s name* you need to find friends who love you.

Student: Is that a kneecap? *fake cough* Slut. *fake cough*

Teacher: Yah Buccanan was our first gay president. Student: But he was a Democrat! Teacher:… you DO know that people can be gay and a democrat.

Student: This whole book was just a giant KFC commercial.

Student: he other day I tried to zoom in on a book.

Student: every time I head an Indian person talk it’s like they’re raping me but in a good way.

Student: You canned corn of a human.

Student: you look like a broken piano

Student: There’s no room for Jesus! I don’t want to see him!

Student 1: Tiger sharks are the goats of the ocean. Student 2: Wrong. I’m the goat of the ocean.

Student: Florida is the Bermuda Triangle of stupid shit.

Student: Jesus has a plan for me, and I don’t think it’s in his textbook of an agenda.

Student: did you talk to her? Because I’m pretty sure blowing up a school is frowned upon.

Student: and that’s on period no tampon.

Student 1: what would your stripper name be? Student 2: Ruby. Teacher who over heard: Excuse me. Teacher here, stripper conversation over there. Please move the inappropriate conversation somewhere where I can’t hear it. Vanilla Pudding. (the thing about this one, was she was telling us that in the past, her stripper name was Vanilla Pudding)

Student: (Different student’s name), if I told you that I was possessed last night would you believe me?

Student: (Teacher) I was possessed last night, is there, like, biology to support that?

Student: Could I theoretically live forever if I drank infinite 5 hour energies.

Teacher: I have more glue sticks I just don’t put them out because the freshman eat them.

Student: drinking chocolate milk isn’t good for you it just like tragic.

Student: who do people even get stds, I can’t even get dms

Student: Tell me you’re kidding. Tell me you did not find my house by looking at snap maps. YOU HAVE MY ADDRESS!!!

Student: Hey you lived in Africa right? Does that mean you can say the n word?

Student: Someone threatened to open up my chest, piss in it, and close it back up.

Student: For how good I am at catching feelings, you’d think I’d be better at sports.

Student 1: I’m a Taurus. Student 2: I thought you were gay.

Student: So if I ate a tide pod then ate a t-shirt what would happen?

Student: Buddhism is just a series of vibe checks until eventually one works.

Student: why does bugs bunny have so much cleavage??

Student: Don’t underestimate snoopy you fucking heathen.

Teacher: So what you’re saying is when the okay boomer generation dies we won’t be racist anymore?

Student: Venus is in retrograde and that’s why Im not dealing with your bullshit.

Student: What is wrong with you. No sincerely. What made you think that eating a green banana is okay.

Teacher: You know Up? In the movie there’s this dog and when he’s talking then he’ll turn and say squirrel. That’s like me. I think I have adhd.

Student: you absolute tea drinking taxes liberal.

Student 1: if you see my cat run. She’s psycho. Student 2: Can I run her over with my tires?

Student 1: I will drive us through the gates of Shaw and into the water. Student 2: I hope we blow up underwater.

Student 1: Juxpositioning my rain boots with my lingerie. Student 2: those rhyme. Wait no they don’t!

Student: when he says he has a tenor recorder, but really we all know he only has a soprano recorder.

Student 1: you’re shoelaces are untied Student 2: I know. I hope I trip on it and die. Student 3:I felt that

Student: Every time I see a 9/11 ad I always pretend to have a panic attack.

Students chanting: Eat the rich. Eat the rich. Student 2: Rich, more like Bitch.

Student 1: UWU I’m going to lock you in my gas chamber Student 2: Primes flame thrower UWU

Student: I’m not Like other girls. I die on command

Studrnt1: Turkey bitch Student 2: she just called you a turkey bitch Student 1: yes you specifically are a Turkey bitch

Student: I will eat a bitches dick. Gobble gobble motherfucker.

Student 1: he opens my snaps in 10 seconds Student 2: that’s love

Student 1: My for you page is almost exclusively gays, theatre, and Percy Jackson at this point. Student 2: Those are all the same thing basically.

Student: I would have kicked so much ass freshman year if I wasn’t depressed.

Student: Navy blue is the white kid who thinks he can say the n word of the color world. He thinks that he’s black.

Student: Your nose hairs look fragrant. Would you mind if I took a taste?

Student: Boxed water tastes like what I imagine trader joes to taste like as a water.

Student: The water from Moana would be a gentle lover.

Student: we feast tonight brother. I found this in the trash can.

Student: Okay, but I cry myself to sleep BETTER than you.

Student: Can you Venmo me some titties please?

Girl holding hands with another girl: It’s a good thing we’re dating otherwise this’d be pretty gay.

Student 1: I just wanted to know if you knew Lincoln personally. Teacher: What? Student 2: We think you’re a time traveler.

Student 1: Sweetie, you’re having a breakdown over rocks. Student 2: I really hate that class!!!

Student: I love being the joker when we play chess

Student: are you saying that you finger fuck your eurethra?

Student 1: Honestly sometimes I just go onto that lofi hip hop radio, beats to relax/study to thing and just get into a fight with someone in the comment section. It’s fantastic. Student 2: Sometimes they do give good advice though, once I asked if I should ask out this guy and they responded with “No, guys ain’t shit” and I was like “aight you right, you right” Student 3: Sometimes it gets weird though, like once I went on and everyone was talking about how sex and money have become the new gods of our time, and how someday a future generation will die without ever seeing the light of the sun. Student 1: Okay but are they wrong though?

Student: It doesn’t matter if you’re a boy or a girl or something in between or something else entirely. A bitch is a bitch, and you sir, are a bitch.

Student 1: so last night I killed and area few of your kids, I hope you don’t mind. Student 2: nah I don’t really care.

Student: what size pussy your phone got?

Student 1: I listen to songs about Greek gods and being polyamorous Student 2: I listen to songs about... smashing.

Student: Motzarella cheese is the pastel pink of the cheese world.

Student: Someone who can bench press 200 has nothing on someone that can just double fist eat Costco sized pound blocks of cheddar cheese.

Student: I will drag you down to hell and make the devil give you therapy so help me. Student: You see, we don’t conjugate words in English, much less math.

Students: well the thing about gamers is, you know they’re good with their hands.

Student: Oka first of all, we’re all on the same planet, so that’s already real small. Then, what are the chances that we were born the same species, like I could have been born a platypus. I could have been a mealworm. Then the chances that we’re in the same country then the same state then the same school like damn. Imma just vibe now.

Student 1: You’re built like a baked bean Student 2: IDK why that hurt me so much but it did.

Student: If I don’t get a hug in the next 10 minus, I’m going directly to the pentagon to tell Trump to suck my dick.

[superchartisland]

Trivial Pursuit (Domark, Spectrum, 1986)

Gallup all formats chart, Your Computer Vol. 7 No. 1, January 1987

Trivial Pursuit the board game divides the world of knowledge into six categories; six wedges of cheese for six spaces in a wheel with six spokes. In pursuit of rounded knowledge from Trivial Pursuit the computer game of the board game, there seems no better framework to adopt than its own.

By the time 1986 turned into 1987, electronic games had become well established as a leisure pursuit in their own right. For the teenagers of the time, they had been popular in some form for their entire lives. The ZX Spectrum and Commodore 64 had been out for five years, and increasing numbers of parents were being persuaded of their educational and fun value. That would carry on -- I got my own Commodore 64 several Christmases later. As discussed a few entries back, computer games were sold in the biggest high street shops. Meanwhile, sports are a familiar subject for AAA. Making games about subjects people already know well is an easy route in for an audience. Taking an already popular activity like football with its own set of defined rules and turning it into computerised form is an even more obvious thing to go for, on both the developers’ side and the players’. With that background, it is no surprise at all to find other existing leisure activities being successfully translated into computer games. The board game Trivial Pursuit was of a similar age to the Spectrum and C64, still in an initial swing of popularity which meant that an electronic version of it wasn’t trying to replace a well-established favourite like Monopoly, but offering an alternative or addition to the fun thing you’d recently come across. The computer game’s manual explicitly calls it a game that “the whole family (Mum and Dad included!) enjoy enormously.” On Christmas Day 1986, many British families must have gathered round the Spectrum after dinner for a game of Trivial Pursuit.

Computer science, particularly at the kind of price that was able to reach large numbers of game-playing households, had only advanced so far. This presented some technological barriers to recreating the Trivial Pursuit experience. Representing the colour brown, for instance, was apparently an unachievable task, and so the art & literature wedge becomes black. Still, Trivial Pursuit is a very viable candidate for transfer to computer form, comprising as it does of a series of trivia questions with a limited appendage of choosing movement and collecting tokens. So the dice also go, replaced by a random dart-throwing animation which captures a miniscule fraction of the tactile sense of ceremony, but mostly the game is intact. Expanded on, even, since the board game couldn’t offer musical rounds where listening to “She’ll Be Coming Round the Mountain” is an essential part of the experience, or easily offer picture rounds. The one remaining issue is that of the mechanics of answering questions. I assumed going in that there would be some kind of multiple choice arrangement, but the actual solution is much more simple and elegant. The game just poses each question and then asks whether you got it right, Y/N? Players of the board game similarly get an answer written down and have to determine among themselves whether the player asked it answered satisfactorily, so why should a computer recreation of the experience be any different? The psychology of presenting an irreversible button-press and relying on players’ honesty in this way is nonetheless a fascinating sideshow all of its own.

I’ve talked previously about the strength of games as ways of presenting spaces. Trivial Pursuit has several spaces to present. One is the board, a recreation of a physical object with functionality retained and resemblance to the original object at the forefront. Another of its spaces is the more completely imagined room in which the question master paces backwards and forwards, surrounded by items to represent the different question categories. Sometimes it goes dark, giving the idea of an image being cast by a projector, the game turning into both test and lecture at the same time. Among the items in the room is a world map up on the wall. And what is a chart but a map of territory, of tangible or intangible space? The Gallup charts by which we are finding our way through the AAA journey are maps of their own territory, suspended between imaginary and real. SalesSpace, we could call it. In SalesSpace, the things that count are time and format and sales, and that’s what’s reflected in the picture of relationships between games that charts of SalesSpace show. In SalesSpace, board game recreation Trivial Pursuit and World War II shoot-em-up 1942 sit together in the same top ten. In SalesSpace, Trivial Pursuit goes between well-remembered arcade games Paperboy and Gauntlet along the route through the UK’s #1 games. Look along the right axes and what you might have thought of as very separate places turn out to be right next to each other.

One of the first things that’s obvious on playing Trivial Pursuit the computer game is its commitment to being as accessible as it can. It’s notable that it uses the keyboard’s arrow keys for directional controls, rather than QAOP or one of the other arcane combinations other Spectrum games tended to go for. Anyone was clearly meant to be able to turn up and figure out what was happening as quickly as possible, and that holds up. Admittedly if I didn’t already know the rules of Trivial Pursuit I would need the manual at hand, but that goes for the board game too. Past that, the basic action of answering trivia questions is fun, its questions are pretty well-pitched as easy but not too much so, and the attention to detail seems reasonable (I haven’t encountered any Hugh Jackilometresans so far). The choice of questions goes for timelessness, even more than the board version since the music question choices are backwards looking, presumably to keep the sound samples copyright-free. Where it doesn’t achieve that timelessness, the perspective on what has changed in three decades makes for intriguing wrinkles -- you could probably still ask “What was Mrs. Fawlty’s Christian name?” but not in those words. Trivial Pursuit is one of the most straightforwardly entertaining games I’ve played for AAA so far.

But is it art? It’s not a question that I’ve engaged with on this blog elsewhere, because it’s not very interesting, but it’s one that somehow doesn’t go away. An inferiority-complex-driven need to justify video games to outsiders as being art seems to have infinite lives. Worse, within some very loud pockets of game culture, that need sits alongside a vicious refusal to tolerate the kind of cultural criticism that art tends to get. Sometimes the same people are the ones saying both, and more. There’s no place for politics in games, apparently. Narrative events only ever happen inside the context of the narrative and not a wider context of authorial choice. Games should just be fun, OK? But, of course, the right kind of fun. The wrong kind of fun means a non-game, a phrase I became familiar with as I re-engaged with video games in the Wii and DS era and read NeoGAF, a gaming forum which was relatively open and welcoming (i.e. it was merely toxic rather than a seething hellscape). Wii Sports was a non-game. Non-games are successful games which are too popular and do too many things which games don’t do to count as games. In a weird inversion of the ‘how is this art?’ Turner Prize winner phenomenon, the mainstream audience sees non-games as a perfectly fine type of game and the enthusiasts proclaiming themselves at the centre of the culture completely deny non-games a place in the category. Not in the sense of them being too lowbrow, but of trying to define them out completely. Trivial Pursuit would surely have counted as a non-game. Which is nonsense, obviously. It provides an experience of a virtual space that’s dependent on the player’s actions, producing an emerging narrative within its bounds. I can’t work out a plausible game definition which wouldn’t include it without going absurdly narrow. Its selection of questions is a meaningful creative decision, illustrating and reinforcing what knowledge is seen as worth knowing. As for the wider art question, let’s just say that I have an equally tough time with any argument that identifies Frank Bruno’s Boxing as art and doesn’t do the same for Trivial Pursuit.

One of the more successful tactics of the kind of gatekeepers who talk about non-games is an appeal to history. They were here first. People who want something different than monolithic hardcore games are trying to change the rightful way of things proven by time. The whole idea of non-games has that idea of definition-by-precedent built in. Yet find the right maps and this appeal to history is revealed as not only bogus, but bogus even within the boundaries of its own arguments. Casual games and casual players have been here thriving all along. As 1986 turned in 1987, more people were going to their local high street WHSmith and buying Trivial Pursuit the computer game than were buying anything that has outlasted it as an emblem of retro gaming. The world mapped out by the games charts has always been a big one with room for many perspectives and interests. It’s not surprising, because it’s the same story for other media. And yes, other media have their own purer-in-the-old-days crews, too. Music discussions are crowded with talk of how things were better in the past when real music ruled. But significantly, it’s almost as common to see the response that there has always been music of different types in every era, even if it’s likely to be phrased as ‘there has always been disposable pop’ or something more derogatory. The narrative of aberration can’t stand when enthusiasts are engaged with the reality that refutes it. It’s much tougher for ahistorical nonsense to gain any credence when reality is a matter of public record, the charts that map history still accessible. But what if your medium has failed to keep its history up so well? What if the only history most get to see is filtered through the nostalgia and commercial goals of a specific set of winning viewpoints? What if Gauntlet is commemorated but Trivial Pursuit isn’t? Then the gatekeepers can just keep on pretending that the current version of what they don’t approve of is a new aberration, restarting their game to fight the same fights over and over again from a position of illusory strength. The selective retention of knowledge is anything but trivial.

Q: What was the UK’s best-selling computer game at the turn of 1987?

A: Trivial Pursuit.

[pjoplusmore]

Child of Hera

Pairing: None

Warnings: None, to my knowledge

A/N: First chapter of my little fic idea here. May continue to post here based on response.

A special thank-you goes out to @perseusjackson-sonoftheseagod for reading through the first few rough drafts.

Disclaimer: I own none of the content in this fic minus a few OC’s. Everything else belongs to its own respective culture, and Rick Riordan

My name is Scarlet Corvus, and welcome to Camp Half-Blood! Yay! Note the sarcasm. Though, that might just be my bitterness shining through. I’ve got good reasons for it too. Been in the foster care system since I could remember. Been in Camp Half-Blood a little longer than that. That makes for 18 years of missing parents. Most everyone here, including the ‘batch’ I came with is missing at least one parent. You’ve got my two friends Aron, living alone with his dad, son of Aphrodite, and Eliza, living with her two moms, daughter of Ares. How did Ares knock up a couple of lesbians? Not something I actually wanna know. Bi? Probably. Anyways, I found them when a Satyr dragged me out of bed at 2 in the freaking morning to run for my life as some weird dogs wrecked everything they could. We ran and ran, stole a car, and drove, slept, ate, and drove some more, until we got here. And I haven’t left since.

“Scarlet!” Eliza tends to get into more trouble than most.

“What’s up?” She’s running up the hill to me, panting, and out of breath. I brace myself for the less than stellar idea.

“Let’s break into the Big House.” Whoop. There it is.

“Are you insane? Chiron will have your head!” I’m just about to drive my book through her skull when Aron runs up behind her.

“We’re doing it whether you come with us or not. The Oracle is here, talking to the 7, and we wanna go see if we get some kind of prophecy!” His grin is almost irresistible. Almost.

“Why do you want a quest? You leave for home every summer. You spend time outside, why risk your lives?” I can see the wheels turning. My friends aren’t dumb, not by a long shot, but they’re not the brightest kids on the block either.

“Fame.”

“Fortune.”

Their responses are simultaneous. It’s all I can do not to groan in pain.

“Fine. I’ll come along. Just to make sure the two of you don’t get hurt.” They both jump up and down. I swear, it’s like looking after 6-year-olds. Aren’t they 17 now? “But first…” I let them register it, and they suddenly freeze. “I’m gonna go talk to Percy.” They look a little scared. Fine by me. Maybe they’ll listen to me next time. And anyways, I am more than a little curious about why Rachel, of all people would visit camp. It's moments like this that I’m really glad I did my best to help Percy and Annabeth when they needed it. The 7 formed a very exclusive club after the war against Gaea. They interact with other campers, from both camps, but their best kept secrets don’t leave their cabins. I’ve managed to get both Percy and Annabeth to talk to me, even if it's not quite to the same extent. Still, it’s not a long walk before I’m at cabin 3’s door. I knock gently.

“Percy?” There’s a small groan, some shuffling, a thud, and the door creaks open. Of course he’s not wearing a damn shirt. I’m not trying to peek in, but… was that my little Annie?

“Scarlet? What’s up?” It seems almost like… if he’s in nothing but the sheets, and that was Annabeth… Okay. I’m not judging. Apparently, though, I am one to space out as Percy snaps his fingers in my face. “Helloooo? Earth to Scarlet? Scarlet, come in Scarlet?” I jerk back up to face him.

“What?”

“There you are.” He chuckles, and the one grey streak of hair falls over one of his eyes. “What’s up?”

“Oh! Oh! Well, I’ve heard that Rachel is in town… and here to talk to you.” His eyes turn hard for a second.

“If she is, and it's from Olympus…” There’s a hard edge to his voice. Sometimes, I wonder why he hasn’t overthrown them at this point. I know I would. Been here eleven years, and I still can’t be claimed? I can’t even guess at which parent is mine!

“So she hasn’t talked to you?” I ask.

“No, she hasn’t. Is she here?” This time, I gulp.

“Yeah. Grapevines move fast. There’s already three plots to find where she is, two to break in, and one that has a remote chance of succeeding.” I laugh, hopefully not nervously. Even if I’m on good terms, breaking into the Big House is kinda taboo, and even with Percy’s tendency to break the rules more than enforce them, if Annabeth is in the room behind him…. Well… best not get caught. His laughter breaks the tension I hadn’t realised that I’d been holding in.

“Right. I’ll let Wise Girl know. Maybe she’ll do something, maybe she won’t. See ya.” I don’t even have time to say goodbye as the door slams in my face. I wait a bit in shock, but vacate the premises, as groans and moans begin to sound from the other side of the door. Perfect. Now I get to dodge both Annabeth and Chiron, keep two children safe and out of trouble, speak with the Oracle, and be in bed before morning cabin checks. Easy. I hope. Finding my way back to the kids was easy. They hadn’t moved an inch.

“Percy didn’t know she was here. Beware Annabeth and Chiron tonight.” Aron looks slightly deterred, but Eliza just looks ready for a fight.

“Fine. Just a bit more planning! Come on Aron!” Before asking for any second opinion, she dashes off.

“Wait! Eliza! This doesn’t sound good! Slow down!” Eliza, of course, is long gone when Aron takes off after her. All I can do is sigh. Prep time. They’ve pulled stunts like this before. Too often. I have a patented kit, they do it so much.

“Scarlet!” I turn at my name. Nobody talks much to the nobody from cabin 11. Yet, Jason, child of Zeus, comes running. Friends in high places, I suppose.

“Jason! You okay?” Few people worry me as much as he does. Well, him and Percy. Chaos incarnate the two of them.

“Me? Yeah, I’m fine. But I need your help anyways.” Now he’s got my attention.

“What’s up?”

“How do I ask Piper out?” It takes me a moment to process.

“What?”

He sighs and grabs me by the shoulder, pulling me behind the nearest tree. “I need to ask her out soon. She’s a daughter of Aphrodite, and half the camp falls in love whenever she walks by, so I need to make a move now. But I don’t know how.”

“Okay. Give me about a day to process, and I’ll have a solution for you, okay?” I feel bad for brushing him off, but I’ve got to prep for tonight. He nods solemnly, and almost trudges off like a hurt puppy. It’s almost impossible to walk away. Almost. The walk back to the cabin is quiet and unsettling. Tension courses through me, as I do my usual and run through all the ways tonights little expedition can go wrong. Before I get through the 25th scenarion, pretty early in the process, I’m at the cabin, opening the door. It’s a large cabin, with sleeping bags and air mattresses everywhere. I shuffle over to my little corner that I’ve cleared of other campers.I sift through the bagts piled under my cot. Theres duffle bags of writing, drawings, poetry and all my other attempts to figure out who my godly parent is. I dive through the plethora of baghs until I reach what I’m looking for. Its a small black backpack, with the zippers locked shut. Slinging the damn thing on my shoulders, I slip out of the cabin. I scramble around, looking for my favourite cliff in the woods. As usual, it’s empty, the one tree overlooking the rest of camp. Nobody but me knows about this place. Well, maybe the 7. Nobody know where they go most of the time.

“Scarlet.” I jump out of my shoes and almost off the cliff. I whip around, dagger in my hand before I register it.

“Jesus Piper, you scared me!” I put the dagger away, and sit on the edge, letting my legs hand. I take the bag and open it up.

“Whatcha got there?”

“Emergency maternity kit.” I answer. It seems to intruigue her, so she sits next to me. I search through the bag. Bandages, salve, ambrosia, nectar, spare weapons, flares, flashlight, flask of liquor, rope, grappling hook, it’s got everything.

“What kind of kids are you herding?” I almost laugh as piper asks.

“The demigod kind.” I can hear her sigh, and turn to her. “What’s up?” It’s as though I threw a switch in her mind. Suddenly she’s a blushing mess, uttering nothing but a mixture of ums, and uhs, and any other space-filling words word you can imagine.

“Well, you see, uh, it’s uh, you know, um, maybe this can wait.” She stands up, and I grab her wrist.

“Piper McLean. You’d think you’d be a better actor knowing who your father is. What is it you need advice with?” She takes a deep breath.

“WellyouseetheproblemisthatIlikeJasonandIalsolikePercyandnicoiscutetooandhowdoyoudistinguishlovefromfriendship?” It takes me the span of about a minute to understand what it took her 3 seconds to say.

“Well…” I think for another minute, trying to come up with a solution. “Let’s see, if your feelings for the three of them are the same, talk to them individually. Start with Nico, end with Jason. You’ll find things will work out well.” Am I going to tell her that, aside from the obvious Percy and Annabeth dating, that Nico is gay, and that I’m purposefully stacking the odds in Jason’s favour? No. Am I doing just that? Hell yes. All the same, she seems grateful.

“Thanks Scar. I’ll see you soon.” This time as she left, I let her go. No sense in letting her see the rest of my equipment check. I rummage through the bag again. Lock picks, check, crowbar, check, ski masks, check. It’s not the first time they’ve broken in somewhere, and it won’t be the last. Seems like I’ve got everything. I head back down to the cabin to get some rest. It’s going to be a very, very long night.

By the time I wake up, I’ve gone and missed dinner. And the campfire song. I’m slipping out of my little cot and out the door. Most people are at the campfire. If we’re gonna break in, its now. The dark night sky makes it difficult, but not impossible to find my way to our little rendezvous spot. The little tree behind the Big House is a risky place to meet considering our upcoming adventure.

“You two ready?” Of course they beat me here. They’re usually more excited for our outings than I am. Aron nods his head shakily, and Eliza looks ready to jump the gun.

“You bet.” She whipers. I slip my bag from my shoulders, and pull out the rope and the hook. I toss them at Eliza.

“Get knotting.” A snort escapes her before I galre her into silence. I pull out a flashlight and toss it to Aron. “Lookout.” He nods and marches off. I pull out a flashlight for myself, and start searching for some indication of the right room. A though occurs to me. “She’ll probably know we’re coming.”

“Let her know. We’ll get in all the same.” Eliza’s cocky as ever. I grunt, and keep looking. There’s movement in a window, and I shut off my flashlight. This time, it’s Eliza who tosses me something. “Night vision. Less likely to see you.” I don’t even want to know where she got them

“Thanks.” I slip them over my eyes and go back to searching. I guess whoever was in the window didn’t see the beam from my flashlight. Either way, there’s an open window. Easy way in, and then we search. Plan: Formulated. I nudge Eliza. “Open window, left corner.” She nods, and I hand her the goggles. I run off searching for the beam of light that tells me where Aron is. I nearly die of a subsequent heart attack as he appears out of thin air. “I swear your ability to change your appearance is more freaky every day. Come on, we’ve found a way in. I’m off running back to Eliza. She’s just winding up with the hook.

“You two ready?” She hisses. I shake my head.

“Let’s do it.” Aron answers. I don’t even need to be told to know that I’m going up the rope first. Without further ado, she trowsh the hook. It clanks loudly and harmlessly against the side of the Big House. We all flinch and dive to the floor. We wait for a minute. Two. Three. This is the longest Eliza has held still in a long time. Eventually, we all stand up.

“Get it in the window this time.” I grit out between my teeth. I almost lose a hand in reply. Never forget that Eliza is a daughter of the god of war. Mental note made. She goes for the same window, eyes invisible behind the night vision goggles. This time, she throws and it goes in. Now its a race against time. Eliza pulls the rope taut, and then lets it drop to the side of the big house. I run up it, hand over hand, I’m at the second story window in seconds. I take a glance around, nobody seems to be coming. I motion with my hand through the window, and both Aron and Eliza scramble up the rope after me. I pull the rope into my bag as they keep watch. Once we’re all set, we move on, gently opening doors where we can, and picking locks where we can’t. Room by room, we search, until we find the room we want. If she knew we were coming, she didn’t care. The door is unlocked as we all slip in, silently trailing one after the other. She’s sleeping silently in her bed as the three of us huddle under the window. We exchange a few glances.

“Who goes?” Aron seems to say.

“Take a guess.” Eliza seems to answer.

“Me.” I say. There’s no surprise at this point. I never set the plans in motion, but I’m the firs one into the fray, and the last one to request treatment. It’s who I am. I tiptoe silently to the side of Rachel’s bed. I reach out a hand, and shake her shoulder. She seems to sit up, but its the spirit of the Oracle that controls her.

The power of Gods once Returned

To command the Youth who once yearned

Forbidden daughter to choose

To the old or new, the Gods must Lose

The oracle slowly seems to vacate the body of Rachel, and three things happen simultaneously. Rachel wakes up and almost screams. But whatever noise she makes is drowned out by the Camp alarm going off, deafening everybody in the Big House, and waking everybody not here. And the third thing to happen is Aron’s sneeze.

I have seconds at best to get us out of here. The window. I toss Eliza the crowbar. “Window!” She seems to understand, and smashes the glass. “Jump!” I dont have time to see if she follows me out of the window, as the door to Rachel’s room slams open, and Annabeth stands there, dagger at the ready. I fall for less than a second, before slamming into the ground. Two accompanying thuds tell me that both Aron and Eliza made it out alive. The three of us take off running into the nearest forest available. Well, at least Eliza and me. Aron has done his thing and rendered himself invisible. I toss a bottle of water to Eliza, and we pour them out on the ground behind us, as a sort of bribe for the nymphs. We both run for as long as we can. The alarms are distant at this point, and we both lean against the nearest tree.

“Step 2.” Eliza stands back up, and begins to strip. I reach into the bag, and toss her a change of clothes. I change as well, and draw out the spare weapons. I pick the telescopic trident, and Eliza, as usual uses a spear. We both face off, and begin to spar. Its about this time that I hear Annabeth running up the hill.

“Scarlet!” She sounds angrier than I expected her to be.

“Halt!” I call out to Eliza, and she stands relaxed, spear as a crutch. “Annie. What’s up?” Seeing her grimmace at the nickname is worth the rant I’m about to weather.

“You know damn well what’s up!” She tries to make the last two words sound menacing. But honestly? Annabeth is much more terrifying if she’s not visibly shaking with rage.

“I have no idea. I mean, I’m not exactly sprinting towards the sirens, but… you know, not exactly anxious to die.” Annabeth looks as red as a tomato.

“If I find out you had something to do with this…” She leaves the threat hanging in the air as she charges off further into the forest. I turn back to Eliza.

“I’m done for the night. I’m exhausted.” I pack everything back up, and Eliza gives me a wink as we both begin to walk back to the cabins. Whatever set off the alarm, if it was us, they wont find a trace. If it was something else, they’ve caught it already. I get back to cabin 11, and almost slam into my cot. It’s been a really long night. I close my eyes and wait for sleep to take me into its welcoming arms.

Masterlist

Tags: @thehalfdoctor @mrs-jjamespotter @hik5 @perseusjackson-sonoftheseagod @wearepjocrazy

[constelacionde-orion]

Every you Every me (9/?)

Pairing : Tony!Father x Reader!Daughter x Steve x Avengers

Warnings: idk(? Summary: You are Tony’s daughter, everything was normal until you recall your past in your nightmares.

A/N : Steve’s point of view… okay I may not told this before… this story takes place in 2020 (well this chapter is now in July 2021) :v

Word Count: 3969

Chapter 1   Chapter 2.1  Chapter 2   Chapter 3  Chapter 4  Chapter 5 Chapter 6   Chapter 7     Chapter 8  Chapter 10  Chapter 11 Chapter 12  Chapter 13  Chapter 14

It's early morning, maybe 10 a.m. The soft wind enter through the kitchen accompanied by faint rays of sun that let the dust see as small glows. The music gives life to everything on the flat, soft jazz it's playing through speakers, still you can hear birds chirping outside, it's a normal morning for Christopher Pace or actually me, Steve Rogers.

I was writing on the notebook, blue ink and a lot of messy doodles everywhere, my hand moved from left to right leaving keywords or full sentences behind. The music in the warm flat made me relax a lot more, but there was something I was still craving. My hand leaved the pen while the other one grabbed the phone to call, seconds after I heard that familiar voice in the other side of the line.

"Pal, you can't call us every 10 minutes, you never know if the walls have ears" Bucky said with a chuckle.

"I know, I was just kind of wondering..." I said while my free hand scratch my beard.

"Steve... you know she hasn't wake up. I mean she made progress with moving some fingers but it's just that, don't worry she's gonna be okay" Bucky said with a calm voice.

"Just call me if something change, okay?" I said with a sad sigh.

I ended the call when Bucky said his goodbyes and then, at 10:15 a.m., there was a knock on the door, Alexander Günther it's here. I quickly go to the door, he was waiting and when the door opens, the man with blue eyes and almond hair is indeed behind the door, his posture only reflected how many control and power he still have and it made me feel a little uneasy, his wrinkles only let everyone know how many experience he have, but still there's something behind those blue eyes, his hiding something behind this posture. he just nod his head as a 'hello' and he makes his way inside the flat. I closed the door and then I turned around and he's looking at the notebook on the table.

"Schön, so you draw too, huh?" he said with a smirk when he saw the doodles (I think), the showed me that in fact he meant the doodles.

"Yes, kind of a hobby to kill some time" I tell him, I made my way to stop the music when I heard him again.

"Leave the music" Alexander said after he sits on the couch.

I don't say anything and go the sit in front of him. My eyes are watching and the old man, he maybe was in his mid 40 of maybe he was now 50, I don't know. Everytime I was with him million of questions came to my mind, did he hurt her?, did he remind her at least?. But I know there wasn't any kind of chance of me to make those questions.

"You know, this song brings back forgotten memories to me. I used to know a girl that really like that piece" Alexander said with a sad smile and I only return the gesture.

"So, Pace. Two months talking about the same topic and still not satisfied" Alexander said, his eyes still looking at the notebook.

"For sure it helps, but theres some things I haven't put in place" I tell him and all I want it's to take the notebook away from him when he took it again, this time with the pen.

"Like what exactly? I gave you plenty of information, so much that both of us can be dead in a blink of an eye if Hydra finds out" he said with a stern voice.

"I know, and I really appreciate it, but-" "But you want to know about the kids" he said when his hand stopped writing on the notebook.

I looked at him confused, and yes I wanted to know about the 'Lazarus' project,  he had told me in two months about the serum, how they created and that stuff, but he never talked about that, until now.

"Yes, I mean if you want to talk about it, I have tell you a million times about this kind of protection we can give you, but, really if you don't want to talk about, you know the children, then don't do it" I told him trying to act as if wasn't a really hard subjet, maybe that way he wouldn't notice that I really wanted him to spill everything about it.

"Children" he said with a chuckle when his eyes drifted again to the notebook, his hand started to move once again.

"They didn't call them that way, they saw them like trash" Alexander said, with a sigh he continued and my attention was at top, while I was recording everything with the phone.

"If Hydra it's good at something, it's at disappearing people, in those days they made a huge research about children, specially in the ones that no one would bat an eye for them, so... they brought hundreds under the age of 15, still just 24 made it alive after the serum." he said with a sad smile.

"At first I saw that project as something wonderful, we were bringing Hydra back to surface, but... I saw all this children dying in awful ways during the process of the serum, and it was then when I realized, it wasn't human. Hydra can make horrible things, but what those children endured... no one would like to take their place"

"Anyway. As I was high commander they gave everyone of us a child. Ana, Viktor, Markus, Ásgeir, Jason, Joshep, Karina, Veronica, Adam, Isaac, Agnes, Richard, David, Michael, Emma, Ari, Kalevi, Olivia, Amanda, Annika, Hans, Roy, Damian and Lilian" he said again with a sigh, my jaw clenched when I heard her 'name'.

"I remember they actual names-" he said with a sad chuckle "May some of them rest in peace" he said with a frown and I was confused by that.

"They were special in their own way, some of them were made for sports, other to arts and the others well, they already had the guts to kill someone without hesitation. Mine was Lilian, this pure little girl, she was pretty smart you know?, she could do anything in a blink of an eye, her gift, was a quick learning and she found the way to use that learning to create new things" he said after a long pause and his eyes looked at me, all I could imagine was to notice Tony’s genes in Y/N. 

"But of course you know that" he said and I felt weird, I have a lot of feelings right now and all I can look in his eyes was regret and hope.

"uh? what-excuse me?" I said really confused by the statement, I really have to still acting.

"Lilian Günther" He said with sadness in both, his face and voice. And there I saw, regret, fear, sadness. But why?

Why Alexander Günther was feeling this way about Y/N? and Why does he think I know about all of this?. In that moment for sure I was frozen, waiting for him to keep talking, while my facade was still and scientist willing to give him protection for this kind of information.

"Alexander. If I asked you about this it's because I didn't knew about the subjet" I state clearly, still, my heart was beating fast and I felt the sweat on my forehead.

"Or because you want to know about her" He said, the way he was talking was, so strange, like if he was his father, that was!, he was talking like Tony!, but why?.

"Alexander" I said with a sigh, and 'frustration' "I don't know any Lilian Günther, but for what you have already told me, she isn't your daughter, she was your trainee" I told him once more trying to turn the tables.

"I saw her that way, Steve" He said and I was totally shocked and this time I didn't know what to do.

"Just listen to me" he said when he saw my hands balled in fists, ready to attack, but by some reason i didn't and I relaxed my muscles, still I was alert.

"This, this is Y/N" he said as he gave me the notebook. He took his time to draw her, at least as the last time I thought he saw her, and God, yes it was her in a drawing. I only nodded with my head.

"Look. When Hydra gave her to me I tried to kept her safe, for sure, I had to teached her to fight and other things, but I never let them touched her, and still sometimes I wasn't with her and other Superiors tooked my job and made her do horrible things but when I was back I took care of her, because her mother asked me to."

"I tried so hard to keep her safe, I tried to make her strong enough for her to runaway I even gave her a fucking map with a shelter for her to arrived when she could finally escape" he said with sadness.

"But I never thought Hydra could kill her mother and after that, everything went downhill. Hydra made with her horrible things, she was under the charge of other superior and they made her kill the other ones with the help of Kalevi, they erased her memory over and over again, until she couldn't remember me, but one day she recalled me..." Alexander said and then he looked again a the notebook.  

Alexander POV 

2:50 a.m. and I was finally back from that shitty reunion on America. I was making my way in the facility when I heard screams and man shouting orders in german. I walked closer to the source of those noises and I couldn't believe my eyes. Yelchin was in the room used by the old Black Widows, the forgotten one, but that wasn't the wrong thing here. 

The wrong thing here was that Y/N was with him, and in front of her was Isaac, he was covered in blood and first I didn't understand but then I saw Yelchin screaming again at Y/N, she refused every his command. The poor little girl of seven years refused to kill and old mate, but Yelchin made her do it. I walked there trying to stop her but Yelchin blocked me, only by his look I knew what he was saying 'don't you dare'. It happened in seconds, Isaac was screaming and when I saw him, he was covered in daggers, then she screamed.

I pushed Yelchin away and I took Y/N in my arms, she hide her face on my chest as she cried in pain and horror.  I felt her little body shivering and I held her closer to me 

"She's not your daughter, Alexander! Stop trying to be his father" Yelchin said angry before he leaved the room, he didn't even bothered to take Isaac's body away.

“Schlaf nur selig und süß, schau im Traum's Paradies, schlaf nur selig und süß, schau im Traum's Paradies...” I sang the lullaby over and over again until I felt her muscles relax. 

When she calmed down I carried her in my arms and I took her to the infirmary to heal her wounds.I went to the kitchen and grabbed some food for her. In that time she didn't spoked any word, she felt better and then, when I was ready to leave her dull room I heard her said 'thank you' I turned around, she was smiling, and that broked my heart, this girl was living in hell, she killed her friend, she had wounds everywhere and she was smiling, innocent, small, but she was happy that I was with her, I nodded with my head and I leaved the room. 

And after that everything went even faster and Hell itself drag her down until no one practically knew her anymore, she barely spoke, her mind was in every Hydra order. It aches me every time to saw her killing someone of being reckless around the facility, training mostly all day and going into field missions from months. Someone could easily tell that she wanted to die, one way or another. Hydra made her a perfect assassin, or at least everyone thought so, because they erased her million of times.

Happens that Hydra lost control in the perfect soldiers, they were too dangerous even for HYDRA. So, they grabbed the strongest, Y/N and Kalevi. Magneto's and Phoenix's altered genes, to kill the other ones. Things were going as the plan, until Y/N refused to kill her friends, so Hydra didn't want to kill her, not at all she was powerful, but they didn't want her to think, so they tooked her away from me, they erased her again.

Once more she returned to kill, but one day made the difference, this simple day, when we were on a mission, someone shot her on the left leg and she remembered everything, her mother, her friends, for her luck I was with her, but we forgot the comm's, everyone was listening to her memories. I tried to calm her down, but she was panicked, she was crying, confused, frightened she didn't knew what to do, and as I was going to told her tu runaway, two agents from Hydra took her away violently, she screamed and I saw how the dragged her once again from the field, but this time something made my heart break. 

"Vater! Hilf mir!" she screamed all the way to the jet and her voice echoed in my brain. 

I tried to go after her, I tried to stop them, but other agents stopped me, I fought them to rescue her and then Yelchin came back. He had a damn smile on his face and he knelt to look at me. Blood boiled inside me as I listened to his words full of venom.

"Stop fighting for her, Günther, she's just an experiment," his damn proud tone of voice.

After the mission I arrived to the facility, looking for her, and I saw her, barely alive in a cage, like an animal. She was broken in all the meaning of the word and I knew she couldn't stay here anymore. I went to the main room and upload every single file from her, maybe Tony, will find her that way. It was a matter of weeks when the facility was on alert of incoming objects and Tony tooked her. And then, I escaped too. 

I looked at Alexander, he was so lost on his memories, and I realized he has tears on his eyes, trapped in there but then I knew, he saw her as his daughter.

"She's... She's in coma" I said and when the word left my mouth I felt akward and fearful, maybe that wasn't the thing he wanted to hear.

He looked at me, angry, confused?, and I explained again, this time he was a little angry for sure.

"But, she's making progress, she's fine" I said trying to chill again, the lest I wanted was an ex- Hydra assassin to kill me.

"She's in coma and you think she's fine?" He said with an angry frown.

I thought to myself to not talk about her anymore, at least her health, he was going to get angrier with every word about it.

"She's strong, that's for sure. Do yo, want...to see her?" I asked even more awkwardly, and I didn't knew if I was doing the right thing, but then, those words made him shift his eyes from anger to hope.

He nodded with his head and I grabbed my phone to show him some videos about her, and couldn't help it but smile at her and then I heard him sob. I turn my face to look at him, he was smiling, he couldn't believe his eyes. He looked at every video about her and he was crying of happiness, she really was his daughter, 14 years together, he saw her in the worst era and now, she was alive, in every sense of the word. When there was no other thing about her, he got up.

"You gotta leave, now" Alexander said with a serious voice. 

"What?-why?" I got up too, grabbing the notebook and the pen.

"Hydra. They are coming for you, they saw us in the bar, they'll arrive at 1:00 pm. leave now" He said as a command. 

"What about you?" I asked him, it could be the last time I saw him, so maybe I could do something for him.

"I'll escape again, don't worry about it. Remember, if Hydra it's good at something, it's at disappearing people, even themselves" he said with a sad smirk.

 I nodded with my head but before I went to grab my thing he held my bicep.

"Take care of her, Rogers" he said in a 'dad voice' like Tony's one, if it wasn't a serious time I would've for sure laugh, but I didn't. And then he leaved the flat and I hurried to grab my things. 

"What?, what do you mean you're coming back?!" I heard Bucky in the other side of the line, of course he was worried.

"Well things went a little unexpected, but I have all the information we need" I assured them.

"Steve" Bucky said in a warning voice.

"What? I mean, somehow they knew I was there, I got an anonym call, okay?" I said trying to make Bucky relax a bit.

"Hell. But, you're okay?" Bucky asked with a relief.

"Yeah, I mean I played a scientist, what could've possible went wrong?" I said with a chuckle.

"I'll not fight you right now about that, actually, I have to leave, things went pretty messy around here" Bucky said with another chuckle.

"Fine. See you at evening" I said with a smile and then Bucky said his goodbyes.

I was waiting inside the plane, by luck, I was the only one on the row, so it was more comfortable. I decided it will be better to relax myself a little so I took out the notebook, I was looking for a page in blank when I saw the sheet Alexander used. The way he remembered Y/N was marvelous, her eyes had that spark, her hair, after all this time he still thought about her, down the portrait was written something in german, I didn't bat an eye and I started drawing in other sheet.

8 hours later I found myself in the elevator of the Avengers facility, damn I was so tired, the plane wasn't the most comfortable to sleep and all I wanted was my bed, but then again, I have this urge to see her, so I pressed the button to her now 'bedroom', so of course, I skipped the main room, but I guessed that F.R.I.D.A.Y. announced my arriving anyway.

I grab my baggage and I walk to her room, I stop in the door, I didn't know what I wanted to see. I held a massive breath and I walk in. Of all the things in the world this is the most unexpected things, my eyes are looking at an empty bed, my heart is racing like a stallion, my breath is caught in my throat and for sure my eyes are going to explode.

WHERE IS SHE?!?!?!?!? is the only thought I have in mind. My bags fell to the floor as I ran to the elevator once again.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y.! Where's Tony?!" I asked frightened by the possibles answers.

When all of this happen? Where was she? Why isn't she on the bed? She didn't have any progress? what the fuck was happening?

"Mr. Stark it's waiting for you in the main room, Captain Rogers" The A.I said, and God I was even more confused.

Tony was going to give me the bad news? Why he was waiting for me?

The elevator stopped at the main room and I practically ran screaming for Tony, and then he was there, holding a Bourbon in one hand while the other was inside his pocket.

"What has gotten into you Rogers? you missed me that bad?" he said with his shitty playful smile, but WHY??? why he was acting that way, his daughter wasn't where she was supposed to be.

"Where's Y/N?!" I asked with my eyes wide open.

"Y/N..." Tony said while looking at the glass on his hand and he deny with his head.

"Tony" I warn him, I was trying to believe that this wasn't true, she wasn't dead.

"Y/N was actually making a great progress, you know a month ago..." he said with a sad smile.

"Tony" I warn him again, I was looking at every move he was making, and then I realised he only takes that Bourbon on that expensive glasses when he's really happy, so why he was using them?

"I guess, sometimes you find the answer when you turn around"  Tony said with a smirk before sipping from his glass.

I'm more confused now, but after hearing at Tony I turn around and-

"STEVE!" It's all I heard before I feel a body wrapped around my body, legs on my waist, arms around my neck, head on my chest... I only let someone do that and that someone is

"Oh my god, Y/N?" I say, I have to look down at her face and there she was smiling like a sunshine, alive, awake, cheerful, it was my Y/N.

"Yes you dork, I've missed you so much" she said, but still she doesn't unwrap herself from me. I don't mind at all, I love to feel her chest against mine, her hands tugging at the hair of my neck.

"But, what the-" the said after she noticed something weird about me, she unwrap herself this time and the face she made when she saw mine, was too hilarious to be true.

Her eyes are wide, her mouth it's open, she simply can't believe her eyes, shes scanning me, every inch of myself. I was trying so hard not to laugh, I had a lot of feelings inside me right now, I wanted to kiss her and never let her go, I wanted to cry for excitement, but I was mostly happy to have my Y/N back.

"Jesus mother of god, your hair, oh my god, your beard" she said, her had came to my face, she touched the things she said with tenderness, like I was going to break in any second.

"Your hair is darker, oh my Steve" she said, her eyes still scanning me, searching for other changes on me, her hand rested on my cheek and I lean in her touch, is soft, warm, just how I remembered.

"You don't like it?" I asked her, afraid that she might not like 'Christopher Pace'

"Steve my love, you can be bald and still I'll always love you, but this is too much. This is-" she said with soft in her eyes. "This is something I could totally don't fight to change" she said with a chuckle and it makes my heart go full speed.

"So you like it" I reaffirmed her statement and she answers with a 'I love it'.

"If you're going to act like crazy love birds, please just go away, I don't wanna see this" Tony said with a role of his eyes, and she didn't think twice when she grabbed my hand to go to our room.

In matter of seconds we arrive there, and it was simply to show her how much I missed her, hell of course we weren't going to leave that room in days.

[b00bstone]

"Talk to me" all the odd #'s pls!

are you the same person that asked about the evens on that other ask? this is long so im putting in a read more 

1: Talk about the first time you watched your favorite movie.

i dont have one? 

3: Talk about the person you’ve had the most intense romantic feelings for.

oh. well. um. i still know them. altho those feelings have subsided quite a lot. theyre confusing af… like when my feelings were the worst they kept giving all these mixed signals. and uuuggghhh. but yeah other than being confusing and dumb at times (all people are) theyre nice. and theyve been there for me through a lot of shit. even tho they didnt have to be. theyre taller than me. theyre chill. and a good friend. 

5: Talk about the best birthday you’ve had.

i think it was my 5th birthday. all my other birthdays that i can remember have been a bit dissapointing. my family and my then bestie smelly bellys family went to a park near our houses. and had food. and the thing i remember most was smelly and i were throwing around this weird rubber band thing? and the weather was really great. i mean its california and july… 

7: Talk about your biggest insecurity.

im insecure about my intelligence and worth. like im dumb af. i always have been. and being smart is kinda held in high esteem…. and im also really insecure about the fact ive never kissed anyone. or dated anyone. or ever gotten asked out on a date. 

9: Talk about little things on your body that you like the most.

i like the color my eyes are in the sunlight. sometimes my eyebrows look AMAZING (not today tho :/) and i love it when that happens. my hair sometimes gets a lil curly. i have a nice butt. imo anyway. and i rather like my boobs.

11: Talk about the best dream you’ve ever had.

i dunno? i had a dream once where the person i was crushing on at the time told me they missed me over and over. and that was nice. 

13: Talk about the first time you had sex/how you imagine your first time

i imagine it will be very awkward. but hopefully fun. mostly awkward tho. i hope it feels good. for both of us (whoever the other person is). ive always imagined it would be with someone i really really trust or a one night stand. altho with the way my life is going ill probably never have sex. 

15: Talk about the time you were most content in life.

i dunno. i havent felt content in quite a while so… 

17: Talk about someone you want to be friends with.

i dunno. i dont really know any one irl that i wanna be friends with that im not. i mean i wanna be friends with thomas sanders but i dont know him at all 

19: Talk about something that happened in middle school.

i was an annoying bitch. also me and my friend smelly had a bit of a falling out. that happens in middle school tho lmao. 

21: Talk about a time you had to turn someone down.

for like a date? thats never happened. 

23: Talk about a time someone turned you down.

okay. so i hope they never read this because i hope theyve forgotten about it. but the first time i ever asked someone out was last fall. i know i know im nearly 18 and it wasnt till last year that i asked someone out? so anyway. our mutual friend monkey was like trying to convince me to ask them out for like 6 months before i did. the person in question had gone through a breakup and monkey wanted them to move on already i guess i dunno. and so like i knew they didnt like me. but then there was this thing and so i was like wiat do they? so i asked them about it. and they were like “no i dont like you” and i was like okay then wtf was all that?!?! and they were like well i guess i didnt realize i liked u and i was like okay???? so would u be willing to date and they were like no not really but they seemed really vagu about it so i was like so wait is that a yes willing to date or no???? it was a no. but anyway monkey continued to bug me to ask them out. so i, being the bumbling baffoon that i am asked them hypothetically if they would date me. they said yes. even tho i expected them to say no. then while i was freaking out about that and trying to think of what to do next they said no. which made me a little upset because if ur gonna say no u should just say it in the first place (dont mess with peoples feelings kids its rude). and so then i got upset and said some mean things and yeah. we went back to being friends.and if they do read this. im sorry dude. really really really sorry. 

25: Talk about an ex-best friend.

well smelly is an ex bestie. smelly and i are still friends but not like best friends. shes chill. when we were super close it wasnt exactly a healthy relationship. she was a bit of a bully. i was selfish and went back on my word all the time. but like shes super chill now. she gets in trouble with her mom a lot tho which sucks. 

27: Talk about your favorite part of someone else’s body.

ummmmm im afraid that this is gonna come out sounding like i have a crush on them but i dont. no realy feelings for anyone at the mo. i like pretty all my friends’ hair and eyes. i especially like heathers hair and adis eyes. 

29: Talk about what turns you on.

confidence. like in the new thor movie trailers theres that woman who breaks his hammer like that kinda confidence where u and everyone in the rooom knows ur the biggest baddest thing around like damn son. 

31: Talk about what you think death is like.

it depends on how u die? i mean besides the whole pain thing i think its kinda peaceful. u know u get that feeling of complete and utter contentment and just kinda fade away. i dont know what happens next. but i think thats what the end of dying and beginning of being dead is like. 

33: Talk about what you do when you are sad.

cry. watch funny things. get on tumblr. try and make myself more miserable. and if it gets to a really bad point ill try and talk to someone about stuff. but i mainly just try and cheer myself up or emotionally wound myself. 

35: Talk about things you wish you could stop doing.

i wish i could stop being so afraid if everything. i wish i could stop falling for people that dont and never will fall for me. i wish i could stop being depressed. and easily stressed. 

37: Talk about someone you thought you were in love with.

ive already mentioned them twice. i think thats enough times for one post. but they like superheros. a lot. like the amount of enthusiasm you would expect from a 5 year old. it can be adorable. except when ur tired and just want everyone to leave u alone and never speak to u again.they dont like rhe beach. which is something i just cant understand at all. how do u not like the beach! they have kind eyes. and i honestly have no idea how i had such strong feelings for them. theres nothing wrong with them and theyre a really cool person that almost anyone would be lucky to have but like i just like u look at someone through a different lense and its just different. itd be like me trying to imagine having feelings for adi or heather. its just weird. theyre going away to college next fall. which im kinda bummed about but thats mostly because im not going to college this fall except community college. they wanna do something with art orfilms i think. he pronounces my name wrong. sometimes. but sometimes he prnounces it right. we are friends on fb. it says right there on my proflie how to pronounce it. we have talked and i have told him my name. like its not that hard! its like the thing that pisses me off the second most of things he does/has done. 

39: Talk about things you wish you’d known earlier.

to do well in higher grades u need to understand stuff u learn n elementary and middle school really well. thats all that i can think of thats not really sad and depressing at the mo. 

thanks for asking me all these questions anon! ily  

[skiasurveys]

sex sex sex sex.

1. What’s your favorite position and why? i like doggy style a lot because i dont know it just feels really great and its pretty dominating..but i also like missionary but its boring but i like it when i want to feel “romantic”. lmao.

2. How did you lose your virginity? If you’re still a virgin, is there any specific reason?  I lost my virginity at 19. Basically I was preparing to bang my boyfriend ( my current one!) but I was super nervous ( I already had some trauma from the past). I was scared and stuff and so we tried and I was like Idk man im scared. Then later that night we just started to kiss and make out and he asked if I wanted to try again and I said sure so I got naked blah blah, I was sitting on him kissing hm and then bam he fucked me but it felt really awesome and nice, didn’t hurt because he was slow at it and then he fucked me from behind after i got used to it lol. Great times. That was like a year ago!

3. If you could have sex with any porn star or model, who would it be?  i dont know any porn stars and im not attracted to any models either.

4. What’s one thing in particular that makes you want to tear off your lover’s clothes? Sometimes if he looks at me a certain way or if were doing something . Or if he starts touching my thighs and/or kissing my neck 

5. Five turn ons. 1. Strong looking/masculine 2.Taller than me but no taller than 6′3 3. kissing my neck. 4. man handeling me (without being too aggressive).5. showing me off ( Not like “OH LOOK WHAT I HAVE” but being proud you have me. 6. Five turn offs. 1. Being an asshole. 2.Acting like you don’t care about me when youre around others. 3.Racist/sexist/etc 4.Creepy. 5.Hating my friends

7. Have you had any embarrassing sexual experiences?   its so embarrassing.. so I had just finished my period ( OR so i thought) and we started to fuck and it was going well.. after we finished he was like “Um i think you still have your period.” and Im like “what?” and yeah there was blood on his dick and I legit ran and cried in the bathroom like a little bitch LOL. He came after me and said it was fine and that hes done more awkward shit but DUDE...

8. Do you have a fetish? not really. I like calling my boyfriend daddy in the bedroom but i dont like the ddlg fetish at all. 

9. Have you experimented with anyone of the same sex?  no 10. What’s “out of bounds” for you during sex?  Choking, or tying me up, or like bondage stuff. I just have a severe panic attack if that happens and I dont like it and I had trauma so its actually triggering.

11. What’s the best sexual unsolicited advice you can give?  Just dont fuck them if youre not ready. 

12. Hickies - get ‘em or give ‘em? both

13. Do you like giving head? im that weird girl who actually enjoys sucking cock

14. Do you like getting head? yes 

15. What’s one thing you look for in a partner?  loyalty and companionship. 

16. How many partners have you had?  1 and im still with him :)

17. What’s your sexual orientation? Straight

18. If you’re bi/pansexual, what gender do you tend to prefer? n/a

19. Describe the best sex you’ve ever had.  Theres a few. It usually is when he goes hardcore with teasing me and kissing me. One time he was kissing me and teasing me. He ate me out for a bit which was amazing, and the he kissed me from my tummy to my lips, and he fucked me hard but slow and said I love you which was awesome. But i also had one where He was teasing me and doing lots of foreplay and he told me he owned me and that he wanted all of me and then he fucked me so good. especially when he cums inside me. MMMMM.

20. Describe the worst sex you’ve ever had. It wasnt bad but I just have depression and sometimes it hits me when were fucking and  i lost my sex drive and just didnt care and it didnt last that long but i lied i orgasmed so he could finish because i wasnt feeling it lol

21. Have you ever had a funny sexual experience? What was it? i dont know. Im sure. 22. Are you okay with rough sex?  Yess just not too rough ok!

23. How big was the biggest dick you’ve ever seen? Was it in a porn or in real life? well i mean guys in porn always have huge dicks but my boyfriend is the only one Ive had and he is pretty big.

24. Boobs or ass - which is better? ass. 25. Do you prefer sex or masturbation? sex i hate masturbating.

26. Describe how you usually masturbate. ill leave that for your imagination. 

27. Do you like tattoos on a partner or do you like them to have a clean slate, skin wise?  i dont care. either or.

28. How do you feel about daddy dom/little girl roleplaying? some people go a little too far with it. Like for example actually acting like they are 4 years old in public. You can leave it to the bedroom, please.

29. What’s your fantasy?  pay off my student loans.

30. Do you have any sexual regrets? no

31. When did you last have sex? april 1st before Connor moved! He will be back in the end of May or start of June so it will be a while before we have sex again :(

32. When did you last masturbate? last night

33. Have you had anal? yeah. Its ‘ight. 

34. Do you like to spank/be spanked?  i like to be spanked.

35. What do you want done to you right now?  well since  I havent seen my boyfriend in like a month i would love it for him to just push me against a wall. mmm.

36. Are you comfortable with getting tied up? no

37. Did you have sex in high school? nope. No one really liked me back then. I had like 2 boyfriends then and it was shitty then. I met Connor the fall after i graduated. Hilarious.

38. How old were you when you lost your virginity? How long has it been? 19 years old and its been a year now.

39. Do you like teasing or would you rather get straight to the point? teasing.

40. Sexting or phone sex?  ive done both. sexting is fun but phone sex can be pretty hot. I just dont like phone sex..i rather sext tbh

41. Have you had sex in any interesting places? One time we were hanging at our friends place and everyone had gone to bed and Connor was cuddling me on their couch and he said , “ I bet its just bothering you that you cant touch me” and im like whatever idc and then hes like “lets lowkey fuck” so we fucked on their couch while they were sleeping! It was pretty fun but nervous cus if someone walked out. oh god..and then we fucked behind a couch like 3 times while there was a party going on. cool.

42. Are you sexually active?  i guess so. since he moved its hard to say but its only for short time.

43. Have you had car sex? no our car is too small for that. but i want to.

44. Have you ever had sex with anyone else in the location you were at? (i.e., while your sister was in the other room) yes..see above

45. Why aren’t you fucking anyone right now? well the only person i would fuck is in a nother city obvs so thats why.

46. Are you able to have emotionless sex? not rly

47. Does penis size really matter? yes

48. What has been your most memorable experience sexually? theres a lot

49. If male, are you well endowed? n/a

50. If female, what’s your breast size?  34 B cup.

51. Have you ever been the other person? no

52. Have you ever cheated on anyone?  no!

53. Describe an orgasm.  i just felt really weird and shakey but it felt so good.

54. What’s the longest time you’ve had sex for? I dont really keep count.

55. What’s the shortest time you’ve had sex for?  like 5 minutes. -___-

56. If you could change the person you lost your virginity to, would you?  no

57. Have you had any pregnancy scares? Yeah kinda. my one period didnt come once and i was so scared. I bought like 3  sticks.

58. Are you comfortable naked?  kinda. Ive been with Connor for a year now and I still feel awkward naked. lol

59. Are you comfortable sending pictures of yourself to others? depends.

60. What’s your sexual comfort zone like?just dont do rape play.

61. What’s something sexual that you thought you wouldn’t like, but ended up liking?  i cant think of anything

62. Do you have any piercings in fun places? (i.e., clit, nipples, dick) no

63. Would you say you’re good in bed?  i think so.

64. How do you get sex tips? internet or i ask him how he wants me to do something. like i ask him if he likes what im doing and he will tell me how he wants it.

65. Have you ever had sex with anyone while they were on their period? Have you ever had sex while on your period?  no except that one time when i thought i was fkn done but i wasnt. kill myself.

66. If you could be the other sex for a day, would you and what would you do first? idk.

67. What’s your favorite part about being the gender you are? I dont know really. I can buy cute drinks without looking dumb?

68. Slow but passionate, or fast, furious, and kinky? slow but passionate. But also depends on the mood or whatever because sometimes i want rough, sometimes i don’t.

69. Have you ever 69’d? Did you enjoy it?  yes but it feels too good to suck him while hes eating me out.

70. Have you ever done drugs and then had sex?  weed

71. Have you ever had sex with someone you’re in love with? yes

72. How are you with BDSM? Would you ever engage in it?  nope.

73. Do you like gagging on cock/having someone gag on your cock? Why?  i love gagging on his cock.

74. When it comes to oral, are you gentle? Do you use your hands too? gentle. i dont want to hurt him but if i do go hard kinda. and yeah i used my hands.

75. Okay, how do you feel about handjobs?  sometimes i do hand jobs but its only when im making him hard. Lol.

76. Have you had any unwanted pain during sex? yeah.

77. What is something that’s not sexual that can turn you on more than anything sexual?  arms? 78. Can your sexual partners be categorized by their zodiac signs? no

79. Have you had sex to music? What’s your favorite sex song? we fucked to Wish you were here by Pink Floyd.

80. What’s something you want to try in bed?  i dont know.

81. Has anyone drew blood from you during sex, whether it was by cutting, biting, or scratching? How did you feel about that? no. if there was blood from biting/scratching/etc i would feel awful.

82. Have you ever fucked someone who was sad? Did it help them emotionally or make it worse? I have fucked him when he was sad and it helped and same for me sometimes it makes me feel way better.

83. Do you like sexual anons? no

84. What’s your ideal round of sex?  i dont know.

85. Do you like the use of whipped cream, handcuffs, chocolate, and cherries?  nope.

86. Have you ever been walked in on or caught?  almost got caught.

87. Have you ever had sex in public? Would you? yes and i would.

88. What’s a good sex joke?  i dont know. 89. Do you like to be called a dirty slut or would you rather be treated like royalty?  i love it when he calls me a slut but theres a time and place during sex when i want to be slutty and then loved LMAO.

90. Are you more submissive or dominant? sub 91. What’s your naughtiest secret? i almost fucked a 33 year old when i was 18.

92. What’s the weirdest thing you’ve encountered sexually?  i cant think of anyting

93. Have you ever “stuck your dick in crazy”? Was there a lesson learned?

94. Do you like playing with balls/having someone play with yours? i like playing with them because he loves it. 

95. What’s the best nonsexual feeling?  feeling safe and loved by them.

96. Do you like feet? ew 97. Do you look at rule 34/hentai? ew....

98. Pick a random question off this survey for yourself. N/A 99. Who’s your ideal sexual partner? MY BOYFRIEND.

100. Do you have a partner right now? Would you like one? have my boyfriend :) 101. Are you accepting “applications” for a partner?  um no

[sadrien]

wanna chat? pt. 14

on ao3 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14

i got my harry potter nerd on for this chapter, mostly because i wanted to write and didn't know what to write about

also, i'm glad you all liked the previous chapter <3

dipshit = adrien fergie = alya no = nino dancing queen = mari

enjoy~

16:30

fergie: its 2 quiet in here time for the #discourse

no: no

fergie: shit im blanking i need a topiC @the babs: someone pls

no: i refuse to support this

dipshit: Anything?

fergie: yes

dipshit: Ok give me a second

no: fuck dude i just wanted a day of chill

fergie: babe with friends like us thats just not possible

dancing queen: What are we doing??

dipshit: Hogwarts house discourse Go

no: i cant believe i have to break up with you

fergie renamed this conversation to “hogwarts house discourse”.

dancing queen: Oh no

fergie: alright alright alright adrien = puff mari = puff nino = puff

dipshit: How do you figure

no: uhhh

dancing queen: Sorry al that seems wrong

dancing queen: oh it is it definitely is but ur all sweet enough for hufflepuff and loyal and we all eat too much food hmmm realistic one… adrien = puff mari = snake nino = raven mayb

dipshit: Make Mari Gryffindor and I’ll agree with you

fergie: whaaaaaat our girl is ambitious aF theres no way

dipshit: But she’s also a really strong leader and incredibly brave

dancing queen: If were arguing over anyone Id say adrien should be a gryffindor Oh wait maybe ravneclaw???? Hes super smart Shit this is really hard? He could be in three???

no: the fuck i was thinking slytherin actually

fergie: ???

dancing queen: ???????

no: listen my dudes the hat takes what you want into consideration right? it does it for harry anyway

fergie: what does this have to do with marshmallow being a snake which is just not accurate

no: im getting there

dipshit: Are we going by stereotypes or nah

dancing queen: Nah The stereotypes suck

no: im just saying theres no fucking way if we were wizards teh agrestes wouldnt be pure bloods and gabriel would be classic fucking slytherin

dancing queen: Ok Ill agree with that

fergie: mhmmmm

dipshit: I wouldn’t say that

no: bro even if you arent going off stereotypes your old man is probably the mos t ambitious perosn ive ever met like scary mari is almost as scary

dancing queen: Hey!!!!!!

fergie: so sorting hat

no has changed their name to sorting hat.

sorting hat: sup

fergie: are u saying adrien would ASK 2 b slytherin

sorting hat: well yeah yeah i am 

fergie: …………… i did not consider

sorting hat: i know you didnt

dancing queen: First of all since we cant decide and Im getting mixed answers from online quizzes

dancing queen has changed their name to lion snake.

lion snake: Second of all doesnt the hat also base it off of what you value the most??

dipshit: Lion snake? Like a chimera?

fergie: nerd

dipshit: Actually the chimera also has a goat ignore me

sorting hat: what the fuck

dipshit: Greek mythology

fergie: u kno what i dont wanna kno

dipshit: Anyway back to this

sorting hat: oh yeah anywa yeah the hat does but adrien wanting to please his dad might overrule that idk my dude jk didnt exactly lay ou t the rules of this super great

fergie: jk needs to c h i l l and ye each of the golden trio couldve ended up in at least one other house

dipshit: That would’ve been cool Also I don’t think I try to please my dad that much

fergie: oh sweetheart

sorting hat: dude

lion snake: Adrien you really really do

dipshit: Really?

fergie has changed their name to adriens legal guardian.

adriens legal guardian: someone needs to take care of you

dipshit: I promise I’m fine I’ve got Nathalie

sorting hat: does nathalie give you hugs

dipshit: No? Why is that relevant?

adriens legal guardian: SHE DOESNT COUNT THEN #HUGADRIENAGRESTE2K17

adriens legal guardian has changed their name to i love adrien.

i love adrien: turn on ur location agreste

dipshit: Please know that’s actually kind of creepy I’m at home you don’t have to worry about location

i love adrien: hella

sorting hat: alya chill out with the name chagnes also now im gonna be confuse d

i love adrien: i love him too but truuuuu

dipshit: ????

i love adrien: can i change it

sorting hat: last time for today??

i love adrien: ilysm

i love adrien has changed their name to cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub

dipshit: I have a fanclub? Wait that wasn’t the smartest thing to say

lion snake: Its a good thing youre cute

dipshit: I try to ignore them

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: have u ever been on the official insta of the fanclub bc its hilarious and beautiful

dipshit: …. Alya why

sorting hat: oh we totally googled you

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: mhm

lion snake: ^^^^

dipshit: That’s…..nice of you?

lion snake: Sorry if that makes you uncomfortable omg

dipshit: It’s just? Kinda weird?? I don’t mind and I probably should’ve expected it I just forget sometimes that that’s a thing people can/will do

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: adri if it makes u feel any better i google everyone ive googled everyone in this chat in our class their parents ymself random strangers if im able to

sorting hat: that is not surprising at all

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: ur not special i mean u r ur v special to me and ilysm but not here everyone gets googled and twitter stalked also tell whoevers running ur official accounts to be less lame idc about salad u eat

dipshit: What????

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: ur social media is B O R I N G i kno u dont run it but i still expected more memes

dipshit: Honestly I don’t look at it

sorting hat: its like the person we thought you were when we first met you except more boring

lion snake: Ok no thats not true Because I thought he was an asshole

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: oh shit tru

dipshit: Ahhhh yeah sorry about that

lion snake: Its fine I promise!!! Weve talked about this Its like Super perfect adn model-y and professional andnot  at all a teenage loser who stayed up until 2 watching sailor moon and eating doritos

sorting hat: fucking relatable

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: weebs

sorting hat: yo youre the one who decided to date some

lion snake: Hey Ive never asked Adrien do you have unofficial personal social media???

dipshit: ……………………. Shhhhhh

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: WHAAAAAAAT LINKS LINK S LINKS LINSK

dipshit: I have a tumblr but that’s it

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: oh my go d this weekend  we get 2gether adn make adrien all the social media and we revamp his tumblr bc ur theme sucks

dipshit: ???? You’ve never even seen it???

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: i know it does marsh !!!!!!!! can u imagine if lb and cn had social media!!!!! id c r y

PM between dipshit and lion snake

dipshit: P l e a s e

lion snake: Oh my og d

dipshit: Please please please please please please please plEASE

lion snake: HOld on!!! Im discussing with tikki

dipshit: Plagg says he doesn’t care what we do

lion snake: Yeah we arent trusting him

dipshit: Fair enough WHAT IF I CAN GET SNAPCHAT ON MY BATON A LITERAL SNAPCHAT

lion snake: No Just because of that No

dipshit: Pleaaaaaseeeeeeeee My lady it’ll be great I swear

lion snake: U gh Well talk on it on patrol tonight k??

dipshit: YES!!!!

19:05 in hogwarts house discourse

sorting hat: i know weve moved on but man. fuck snape

 20:12

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: do u think if i track down lb and cn and ask them for their hogwarts houses theyll tell me

sorting hat: worth a shot?

 20:42

cochairman of adrien agreste fanclub: update: chat says ladybg is a gryffindor and lb says shes iether that or slytherin so like mari and they cant agree on cn

 22:53

sorting hat: damn you adrien i cant stop thinking about this what is mari?? what is adrien??? what am i?? al youre either gryffindor or ravenclaw ive decided

lion snake: Youre the sorting hat shouldnt you know all???

sorting hat: bruh we need the actual sorting hat for this

lion snake: Fair enough

sorting hat: lets say adrien is a hatstall and move on

3:03

PM between dipshit and lion snake

dipshit: Rise and shine bugaboo Akuma at 3 o’clock Literally 3 o’clock the time not the like If you’re using 12, 3, 6, and 9 as directions It’s not You know what My tracker on my baton is turned on so use that to find me

 3:08

dipshit: Mari Mari Alright plan b I’m gonna call  you and if you don’t pick up I’m going to show up on your balcony Which sounds creepy but also this akuma is now stacking cars and I don’t really know what to do? They aren’t even trying to do anything else right now Am I missing something??? I’m confused

 3:12

lion snake has changed their name to ahHHH

ahHHH: IM SO SORRY Tikki woke me up my phone was muted She says Waitw e dont hav etime for this Ive gotta transform so Ill talk to you when I get there??

dipshit: It’s fine just watching an akuma build a tower out of cars Remind me to show you how to sync Skype up to your yoyo

ahHHH: Youre on skype on your baton??

dipshit: Yeah it makes things easier

ahHHH: Huh Al and nino didnt wake up?

dipshit: I think the akumas too far away for them to hear, but also it’s not exactly being distructive When we actually start fighting people might start waking up but for now it’s being pretty quiet even with the car stacking

ahHHH: Well thats good they need their sleep Wait if the akuma was quiet how did you know??

dipshit: People started posting to the Ladyblog forums and I had that open in another tab

ahHHH: ???/ Why were you up????

dipshit: Bad night I couldn’t sleep so I put on Howl’s Moving Castle

ahHHH: Feeling any better?

dipshit: I’m sure I’ll feel better when I see you :3

ahHHH: Oh myg do Itst oo early for this Ill see you in fa few just stop that cat face

dipshit: ;3

[nyan76]

all of them >:)

1. Do you have a good relationship w/ your parents?I can imagine its a decent relationship

2.Who did u last say “i love you” to?@ifoughtabee and @sylvir-raven during livestream last night

3.Do you regret anything?yes, theres so many things i regret

4. Are you insecure?yes 

5. What is your relationship status?single ;-;

6.How do you want to die?idk tbh, as long as i die happily

7. What did you last eat?bread w/ cheese (is that called a sandwich??)

8.Played any sports?I used to play baseball, i was really good @ it too

9. Do you bite your nails?no

10. When was ur last physical fight?never been in one, im a lover not a fighter

11. Do you like someone?Platonically yes, romantically no

12. Have you ever stayed up 48 hours?no, best is 24

13. Do you hate anyone at the moment?no, its really hard to make me hate someone

14. Do you miss someone?yes, a lot of people.

15. Have any pets?of my own? no, parents own? yes

16. How exactly are you feeling at the moment? sick n happy

17. Ever made out in the bathroom?no, never been in love

18. Are you scared of spiders? yes, but some are adorable

19. Would you go back in time of you were given the chance?tbh no, i dont want to risk changing what i have now

20. Where was the last place you snogged someone???? never happened??

21. What are your plans for this weekend?well, for this upcoming weekend i plan to spend it with @ifoughtabee and @sylvir-raven , especially since its bees bday soon

22. Do you have any kids? How many?lmao no

23 Have any piercings? How many?none

24. What is/are/were your best subject(s)?Math

25. Do you miss anyone from your past?yes

26. What are you craving right now?i would put love and attention but its probably food

27. Have you ever broken someone’s heart?yes, i didn’t share the same feelings they had for me when they confessed

28. Have you ever been cheated on?never been in a relationship lmao

29. Have you ever made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?no

30. Whats irritating you right now?im sick and my voice is all over the place

31. Does somebody love you?i hope so?? i know my friends love me!!

32. Whats your favorite color?purple

33. Do you have trust issues?not really

34. Who/what was your last dream about?okay so like, it involved me, @ifoughtabee , @sylvir-raven , and basically we were helping people like, hook up?? it was weird

35. Who was the last person you cried in front of?my parents

36. Do you give second chances too easily?yes

37. Is it easier to forgive or forget?hmm, forgive probably, but i forget too easily about anything ;-;

38. Is this year the best year in your life?so far yes

39. How old were you when you had your first kiss?whats with all these romantic questions never had one ;-;

40. Have you ever walked outside completely naked?i hope not

?? the ask post skips to 51??

51. Favorite food? i would die for pizza

52. Do you believe everything for a reason? for the most part yes

53. What was the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? talked to my bbffs (best bee friends forever lmao) @ifoughtabee and @sylvir-raven

54. Is cheating ever okay?Hell no

55. Are you mean?i can imagine not?? im a generally nice guy so ive been told

56. How many people have you fist fought?none

57. Do you believe in true love?yes, there is someone for every person who looks for love

58. Favorite weather?i love it when it rains

59. Do you like the snow?never seen snow before ;-;

60. Do you wanna get married?yes

61. Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby?ye its kinda cute

62. What makes you happy?talking to @ifoughtabee and @sylvir-raven . people who like my art

63. Would you change your name?not really, kevin is a decent name for me

64. Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? never kissed a person?? if its on the cheek then not really

65. Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?i uhh i dont know?? i would probably freak out and be constantly blushing that someone likes me??

66. Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around?  i act my complete self to anyone so yes

67. Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to?instead of opposite sex, ill just put my friend, and that would be @sylvir-raven

68. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?  does last night count? cause then it was @sylvir-raven and @ifoughtabee ( i think idk if the stuff i said was deep conversation worthy? )

69. Do you believe in soulmates?probably yea

70. is there anyone you would die for

@ifoughtabee @sylvir-raven and my mutuals, and other friends.holy shit this took too long lmao