#imagine how much more human this film would have felt if it had practical effects and shot on location instead of green screening | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

witcherslittledove · 3 years ago

Text

Home is Where the Heart Is

A Joey/Henry lockdown fic - AO3

Rated: T

Words: 7k ish

CW: RPF, covid, far too much pining?

_______

“I’m sorry, Joey,” Madeleine sighed again, pressing her head into the crook of Joey’s neck, her hair tickling his cheek.

It was pulled back into a messy bun, flyaway strands surrounding her face in a halo, and as the sun shone from behind her, she looked like some kind of angel. Joey wondered, not for the first time, how he’d even been so lucky to have Madeleine as a friend. She truly was a wonder, his favourite person and light of his life. Everyone should have a friend like Madeleine Hyland.

He laughed and pressed a kiss to her temple as he pulled back from her embrace. “Nah, it’s alright, Madeleine. Your parents need you, much more important than little old me.”

“Oh fuck that, you bastard, stop fishing for compliments,” she laughed, swatting him on the arm.

“Aww,” he pouted, “Oi!”

She’d hit his arm again, barely a tap but he pretended it hurt, rubbing his arm and pouting even harder at his friend.

“Come off it, Joey. You’re staying with Henry for the rest of lockdown, that’s hardly a trial,” she teased, poking him in the chest.

Ah yes.

Henry.

The bane of Joey’s existence, mostly because of the fucking ginormous crush he had on his co-star. He hadn’t known Henry had been signed on for Geralt until his audition, really he hadn’t known much at all, just that he’d be auditioning for a bard and that he should probably take his lute to the audition. A spur of the moment decision that had turned his life upside down. He’d gone from a nobody to... well, not exactly famous but people had started to recognise him, much to his despair.

And then there was Henry.

He’d been admiring Henry from a distance for a few years now, watching him in the Tudors had sort of been Joey’s bisexual awakening, and then he’d suddenly been thrust into the most bizarre experience of having to work fairly closely with the man.

Joey would never forget the feeling of Henry throwing him over his shoulder as if he wasn’t almost the same size as Henry.

Fuck, that had been hot.

And now, Joey had to cohabit with said crush for an indeterminate amount of time, preferably without making a fool of himself.

He was doomed.

Of course, he could have said no when Henry had offered his place when Joey was grumbling about being alone during lockdown after Madeleine's parents got sick, but no… Henry had stared at him with such shining hope in his eyes that Joey never stood a chance.

Joey just needed to keep reminding himself that Henry was straight. He was practically the poster boy for heteronormative; classically gorgeous, action star, gymrat, lover of sports and building fucking computers.

Okay, maybe Joey was generalising a tad, but it was a form of self-defence.

Christ, the mere thought that Henry could be interested in men… interested in him.

It was too much.

So here he was, saying goodbye to his best friend whilst waiting for his biggest crush to pick him up. Madeleine bundled into her car with the last of her bags, and Joey was left waiting on the pavement. In all honesty, he would have preferred to drive to Henry’s place himself or at least get the tube, something where he felt like he was actively doing something. The waiting was killing him, making his thoughts run out of control. Maybe he shouldn’t have packed his guitar. He could have at least been tuning it, or plucking out some meaningless melody, anything to keep his hands busy and his mind distracted.

When the black car pulled up, Joey let out a sigh of relief before realising that it was very much frying pan, fire. Luckily, before he could really start to panic, the back door opened and Joey was almost bowled off his feet by a large bundle of fur that Henry claimed was a dog and not, in fact, a bear.

“Kal!” Joey greeted warmly, burying his fingers into Kal’s neverending fur, and letting the dog lick all over his face.

“He’s missed you,” Henry called in lieu of a greeting.

He was wearing a grey henley that looked like it was two sizes too small and his dark blue jeans seemed to strain against his quads. Henry’s arms were crossed in front of his chest and he looked down at Joey with a blinding Hollywood smile that made Joey’s heart flutter. Dark curls seemed to have finally recovered from the weeks stuck under Geralt’s wig and they fell in front of his so very blue eyes.

He was bloody gorgeous, and it wasn’t fucking fair.

So Joey did the only logical thing, and started to coo at Kal instead. “I’ve missed him too,” he trilled happily into the dog’s fur, scratching Kal behind his ears. “Such a good boy! The bestest, cutest doggo.”

“He’s not the only one who’s missed you, you know,” Henry groused, although when Joey looked up, he was still smiling so Joey didn’t feel too bad for paying far more attention to Kal than the gorgeous specimen of a man that is Henry Cavill.

“Aww, you sap,” he chuckled. “Well, I still haven’t forgiven you for those cruel and terrible words you cursed me with the last time we met.”

It wasn’t the last time they’d met. They’d had a few scenes after the argument in episode six. Scheduling had meant that it wasn’t filmed entirely in order, and then there had been reshoots and post-production parties, premieres and the table reads for season two, but it was a sort of in-joke. Joey liked to tease Henry about the argument, they’d both lurked enough online to know that ‘the mountain’ was a big fucking deal to the fans of their characters.

Henry rolled his eyes and opened his arms out for a hug which Joey eagerly returned, inhaling the soft musky cologne that Henry wore and enjoying the strongs arms that wrapped around him. He loved hugs, but most of Joey’s male friends would do that god awful hug and pat thing, then pull away too soon. Henry had never been like that and it was delightful, even if it really didn’t help the not so little crush that Joey had on the man.

It was cliche but it really did feel like coming home.

Fuck.

He was utterly screwed… and not even in the fun way.

The drive to Henry’s place was quiet, Joey spent most of the time watching the streets of London roll past as they weaved through bendy roads that webbed across the city. The traffic was weirdly non-existent, a side effect of a global pandemic, and he couldn’t help but be reminded of the ghost towns from films and books.

It was truly haunting, spooky in just the right way. Horror and the Wild had very much had woodland magic vibes, but driving through the dead streets of London, Joey wondered what happened to the fae when a city sprung up near their home. Did they adapt like the wildlife did? Urban spirits that lurked in the shadows, in the alleys, behind the bins and cobbled streets at the back of theatres.

Most theatres were supposed to be haunted, Joey had always wondered just who the spirits were that glided through the aisles when the shows went dark.

Henry didn’t feel the need to fill the silence which Joey was grateful for. On set, with Jaskier on his fingertips, Joey was happy to joke about and laugh and banter, but he was nervous about the move to Henry’s and the silence gave him time to get lost in his own imagination, a reality that wasn’t quite the one they knew.

He was almost disappointed when the car pulled to a stop in front of a rather grand house. It was part of a terrace but that was unsurprising, most places in London were, but it was much nicer than the shitty little flat that Joey shared with Madeleine.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

They were poles apart. Even being friends was unrealistic. How the hell was Joey supposed to even pretend they were in the same league? It was fine. Everything was going to be fine. Joey just had to be a perfect house guest, no clumsy mistakes, no setting fire to any ovens, and no slipping in the shower and messing up his ankle.

He’d just have to spend all his time with Kal lest Henry find out just how much of a walking disaster he could be.

Henry had only offered because he was a caregiver, selfless and kind in everything he did. He would have done the same to anyone else if they’d mentioned spending lockdown alone. Joey was just the lucky one.

Or unlucky.

He hadn’t quite decided yet.

Yes, he would just have to spend his days with Kal and his guitar, stay out of Henry’s way and then everything would be fine.

Right?

___

Joey’s plan went according to plan for almost an entire week. He mostly kept to his room and occasionally the living room. Henry wanted to show Joey some films he liked and it would have been rude to say no, so Joey curled up with Kal on the floor to keep some space between them. That way he wouldn’t be tempted to snuggle up against Henry’s chest the same way he did with Madeleine, only it wouldn’t be the same because Madeleine was his best friend and Henry was… well… Henry.

It was such a mess.

And he was probably being an arse.

They’d gotten along so well on set in between takes, but now, without Jaskier there as a crutch, Joey’s anxiety was getting the better of him, and all because of a stupid crush. This would all be a lot easier if Joey were straight; no awkward crushes, no pining for a man he couldn’t have, no… whatever this was?

He could flirt and tease and banter just like he would with any of his friends because it was harmless.

If only.

No.

He had to do better. The reason Henry had invited him to stay was so neither of them would be alone, and despite all his cuddles with Kal, Joey was really starting to feel touch starved. He’d never gone so long without human touch.

The problem was that Henry was just so fucking sweet. He was so bloody understanding that it made Joey just yearn even harder. There was never any pressure to hang out, just gentle suggestions, and the most amazing home-cooked meals that Henry said could be heated up another time if Joey wasn’t hungry. The wine Henry picked out to go with the meal was heavenly, and fuck, the man could cook.

He felt like he was being seduced; wooed with the most gorgeous culinary delights that were truly to die for.

What was a poor bisexual to do?

So every evening Joey would sit across from Henry at the table, trying to joke and laugh just as they had before, but even to his own ears it felt flat. Madeleine’s voice in his head reminded him that that was probably his anxiety speaking but, of course, he ignored it. They ate their food and then Joey would either retreat to his room with his beloved guitar or Henry would suggest a film.

Until Henry decided enough was enough.

Joey was lured from his room with the sweet delicious smell of pizza, and when he came down the stairs he found Henry already on the couch, two boxes of pizza and a couple of beers already opened and ready to go.

There was no sitting on the floor, not with pizza and a Kal. Joey wouldn’t get to taste the greasy wonders of his takeaway if he sat on the floor, and the pizza box was already being guarded by Henry on the couch.

He had to break his rule.

Fuck.

“Kitchen table not good enough?” he teased with a quirk of his lips.

Henry scoffed. “Who eats pizza at the table?”

It was a fair point and sighed, resigning himself to an evening pressed up against his friend when his cuddle instincts got too much. Maybe it wouldn’t be a bad thing, maybe it would help get him out of his head and into the moment… maybe he should just let Jaskier out of the box and pretend that all was fine?

No.

He could do this. Just… be himself?

“Before I open this box, there is one very important question I have to ask,” he said far too seriously, barely able to hide a smile as he scooped the pizza box into his lap and sat down next to Henry, keeping a safe distance between them.

“There’s no pineapple.”

“Oh thank fuck for that,” Joey laughed and opened the box. It was a standard pepperoni pizza, not his go to, but it was a safe option and one that was always yummy regardless of the restaurant. “Garlic dip?” he asked with a cock of his head.

“Damn, I hoped you wouldn’t like it,” Henry grumbled and pulled a small green topped tub from inside his own box.

“You!” Joey said in mock outrage, “keeping the beloved dip from me. It’s like the mountain all over again.”

“It’s not like the mountain,” Henry grumbled. “I didn’t make the script, you can’t keep blaming me for that.”

Joey’s heart sank as he wondered if he’d taken the joke too far, but when he met Henry’s gaze he saw the man was smiling despite his grousing. “I can,” he insisted.

“Hmm,” Henry replied in his most Geralt-y voice.

And with an internal sigh of relief, everything seemed to be okay. Yes, Joey was pulling some of his energy from his beloved character, but so was Henry, and it seemed to smooth out the edges of his anxiety. The beer helped and everything seemed a lot more relaxed with the takeaway pizza and the film already starting to play on the TV.

“I’m sorry,” Henry whispered after the pizza was finished and the credits had started to roll.

Joey’s head was resting on his friend’s shoulder but he’d managed to keep himself from koala hugging… so far. The vulnerability caught his attention though, and he sat up wearily to peer at Henry.

“For what?”

“I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable by inviting you here.”

Joey wanted to swear, to stomp around the room and tear the place upside down. He’d fucked up. He knew he’d fucked up, his damn anxiety keeping him from being the person he wanted to be, the person he knew he could be if his head just shut up! He didn’t do any of that though. Instead, he slumped back down to lean against Henry and took a deep breath.

“You didn’t make me uncomfortable.”

“I didn’t?”

“No. I’m just- it’s hard for me, being somewhere new,” not a lie, not entirely the truth, “and I didn’t want to encroach on your space. This is your home, and I- umm- I didn’t want to get in the way.”

Henry laughed, running a hand through his hair, pushing the curls back off his face, and Joey was entranced for a moment, wanting to reach out and feel the soft hair between his fingers for himself. It was a miracle that he managed to keep his hands in his own lap.

“Joey, this is our home, for now at least,” Henry said with such conviction and warmth that Joey made a sort of strangled noise in the back of his throat.

“Our home?”

“We have no idea how long this nightmare is going to last. It could be months, Joey. I want you to feel like you can relax here,” Henry insisted, wrapping his arm around Joey’s shoulder and pulling him into a sideways hug.

“Right- yeah, no, I know,” Joey mumbled, trying and failing not to blush.

Now that Henry wasn’t really having to watch what he ate and stay dehydrated for dear old Geralt, he was big.

And Joey was weak.

It was like all his wet dreams were becoming a reality, one by one.

He was just monkey-braining over the fact that Henry was one big, large, strong man that wanted to take care of him. It was pathetic. Joey wasn’t exactly small himself, and he could, should the role require it, hold up pretty well in a sword fight with Henry and not look entirely ridiculous.

“And I know Kal is very cute,” Henry teased, nodding to the dog who was sprawled on the carpet in front of them, “but if you ever need a hug, he’s not your only option.”

Joey definitely didn’t squeak this time. Instead, he finally let himself snuggle up to Henry the way he’d been wanting to all evening, every evening since he’d arrived. “Like this?” he teased.

Henry chuckled, and just squeezed his arms tighter around Joey, “Exactly.”

“I’m sorry,” Joey mumbled. “I was being an arse.”

“No, it’s not your fault.”

Joey scoffed.

“I should have been clearer on day one,” Henry sighed, “although seeing as you live here now, maybe you should cook?”

Joey laughed nervously, burying his face into Henry’s jumper. “Neither of us want that,” he muttered. “Trust me.”

“I’ll help?” Henry suggested, which of course brought forth a dozen images of cooking together, dancing in the kitchen to whatever songs fell past Joey’s lips, lazy early morning kisses as they waited for the coffee.

He swallowed, blinking away the fantasies. “How about you cook, and I’ll help?”

“Lazy,” Henry said with a chuckle but just pulled Joey closer.

“Only trying to keep you safe, darling.”

Darling.

Fuck.

“I mean, Henry, sorry, slip of the tongue. I mean- fuck. I call Madeleine darling all the time?”

“Joey, it's okay,” Henry reassured him.

“Okay.”

With a sigh, Joey untangled himself from Henry’s arms and gathered up the pizza boxes and empty beer cans. Booping Kal on the nose as he went past, he busied himself with clearing up. It wasn’t much and didn’t take long, so sooner than he would have liked he poked his head back around the door.

Henry was sitting on the floor, rough-housing Kal, chuckling as the dog kept licking at his face. The sight made Joey smile softly, and he almost didn’t want to leave, but he was getting tired and he really didn’t want to slip up again. He couldn’t blame every mistake on Madeleine. It wouldn’t be fair to her.

“I’m going to bed,” he mumbled, scratching the back of his hair. “See you tomorrow, Henry.”

_______

After that, things started to get easier. Joey would flop down onto the sofa next to Henry in the evenings regardless of what they were doing. Sometimes he’d lie with his head in Henry’s lap whilst they both read a book, other times he’d pluck at his guitar and laugh over stupid limericks that he could make up about his co-star. True to his word, Henry made Joey start helping with mealtimes, although he soon regretted that decision but refused to back down. The food still tasted good but the presentation was lacking. They spent an afternoon trying to bake bread together… Joey’s did not turn out so well and Henry’s attempt was thankfully less than perfect but still edible. The little flaws made Joey feel a little less inferior, and made Henry seem all the more human.

Kal still got a lot of Joey’s attention. How could he not? He was just so fluffy and adorable, plus Joey loved the little pout that Henry did whenever Kal got more hugs than he did. Joey could pretend that his friend was jealous, and that just helped him sleep a little easier at night.

Cuddling on the couch had become their usual routine, and it settled something deep inside of Joey that had been becoming restless. Mornings were spent watching Henry workout. Joey joined in occasionally but usually he would just cheer Henry on from the sidelines sipping his cup of tea. It was a sight to behold, and Joey thanked the lord that the gyms were currently closed otherwise he would never have been allowed to enjoy the view.

Henry’s arse was truly spectacular.

Despite his morning workouts, Henry had definitely gained a rather lovely layer of fat over his previously tightly toned muscles. He looked stronger. He looked cuddlier. Joey’s crush was only getting worse by the day, wanting to run his hands over the broad muscles of Henry’s back, thighs, arms… wherever he was allowed, but he just settled for the cuddling each day.

Joey tried not to think about the fat building over his own stomach and filling out his cheeks, barely noticeable unless you’d had a lifetime of his mother breathing down his neck about his weight. He was cuddlier too, that’s what he told himself whenever the familiar buzz of anxiety started to build up.

And anyway, Henry didn’t seem to mind.

Kal certainly didn’t. The beast of a dog had started to share the sofa with them in the evenings, squishing between them for maximum cuddle potential until eventually he got bored and retreated back to the floor.

It was really starting to feel like home. There were signs of Joey around the house, sheet music left on the TV cabinet, a set of spare lute strings in the kitchen, the bastard instrument tucked away in the corner of the living room until Joey could bring himself to pick it up. Two sets of keys now hung up by the front door so they could both take turns walking Kal without having to worry about getting locked out if the other was busy. A fluffy worn blanket was now strewn over the big armchair where Joey liked to sit during the day. Even the fridge now stocked Joey’s favourite rosé wine.

All in all, Joey wasn’t hating lockdown. It was frustrating but he enjoyed being inside anyway, and well, the company was pretty great.

The two of them were curled up on the sofa watching the Great British Bake Off on netflix, gin and tonics flowing a little too freely, and Joey felt like he was on top of the world. He had the best cuddler in all of England, nay, the world, a big fluffy puppy to boot and some bloody brilliant booze in hand.

The best thing was that Henry’s hoody had shifted up at some point during the evening, and Joey couldn’t take his eyes off the soft but defined muscles that were often hidden under Henry’s clothes. The dark hair that dipped beneath the exposed band of Henry’s boxers was tantalizing, and Joey longed to reach out and touch…

Only he was drunk enough that his inside thoughts had his hand moving before he could realise, landing on Henry’s stomach.

He froze and stared up at his friend with wide eyes.

“Oops,” he slurred.

“That’s my stomach,” Henry pointed out.

And still Joey didn’t remove his hand, relishing the bare skin beneath his fingertips, but he knew he needed an excuse, so he did the only logical thing and launched his attack. Henry was stronger than him, but Joey had the element of surprise as he tickled his friend, fingers dancing across the exposed skin as Henry desperately tried to shove Joey away. They were both laughing, too busy pushing and pulling at each other, that neither of them quite registered that at some point in the tussle, Joey had straddled Henry’s waist in an attempt to keep him pinned down.

Until suddenly their lips were barely a breath apart.

Oh.

“Hi,” Joey mumbled, smiling coyly down at Henry, the longer strands of his fringe falling into his eyes.

“Hi.”

It wouldn’t take much to lean down and kiss him, maybe Henry would even reach up first. There was no denying the sudden pull between them, and god, Joey wanted it. He’d wanted it for so long now.

So close.

The warmth of Henry’s breath brushing against his lips.

Eyes closed.

Hearts racing.

A soft whisper of a moan.

And then a bark rang out in the room, startling Joey and shattering the moment. He cursed as he fell to the floor, the world spinning from the gin and giddy burst of adrenaline. Kal jumped up into Henry’s lap, barking and whining excitedly at his owner, checking that he was okay following Joey’s tyrannical tickle attack.

Joey felt like an ice bucket had been dumped over his head, feeling far too sober, far too fast.

He’d almost kissed Henry.

Fuck!

“Right,” he slurred as he pushed his hands back through his hair- too long, needed a haircut. “Bedtime, sleep. Yup.”

“Joey?”

“See you in the morning?” he mumbled, although glancing at the clock, he wondered if that was a little optimistic. “Tomorrow,” he amended.

“Tomorrow,” Henry agreed, looking a little disappointed.

Joey refused to think about it. He wouldn’t start to hope. It would hurt too much if this all went wrong.

______

They didn’t talk about it.

Or rather, Joey, didn’t talk about it.

Henry tried to bring it up the next morning but Joey just laughed it off before his heart could get torn to pieces. He didn’t need confirmation that his crush was a no go. He already knew, but he really didn’t need to hear the words. Not to mention his hangover was an utter bitch and all he wanted to do was crawl back into bed and feel sorry for himself, which is exactly what he did.

After a few days, or was it weeks, months, years? Time seemed to stop existing, all Joey knew was his clothes seemed to be tighter than before and he was in desperate need of a haircut, but after a lockdown-eque period of time, all was forgotten. They fell back into their usual routine, and Joey’s crush continued to simmer just below the surface, unnoticed by Henry.

He’d started to facetime Madeleine most evenings just before bed now that the novelty of living with a bloody filmstar had worn off. He missed her terribly and she seemed to be going crazy at her parent’s house. There was a twinge of guilt stabbing in his chest when he realised he’d all but forgotten about her the first few weeks of lockdown, but it was nice to catch up with her again.

Henry was brilliant, but he was no Madeleine Hyland. He wasn’t Joey’s best friend.

And sometimes Joey just needed to vent about Henry’s stranger habits. Like seriously, why wass there that weird sponsored water just stationed around the house? And what was with the weirdly staged selfies on instagram. It made Joey feel a whole lot better about his own lack of media presence. He’d rather be a mystery online than this boomer energy than Henry had going on.

Venting to Madeleine helped too, he got less frustrated about the shit hole that was life during a pandemic. A little less angry, a little less depressed, and a little less pathetic with his pining over Henry, although Madeleine would probably disagree.

She was probably right.

The sudden cold turn in the weather hadn’t helped. It wasn’t too bad but Joey had mostly brought summer clothes with him because he honestly hadn’t thought he’d be staying more than a couple of weeks. Thankfully he’d thrown in a couple of onesies for comfort reasons so he spent most his days dressed like a tiger and hoping that Henry would find it endearing. The best part was his onesies were a bit looser and fit him more comfortably than his normal clothes. A lockdown diet was brilliant, but not exactly what he’d had in mind when he’d gone shopping all those years ago.

What he hadn’t expected, was for Henry to rock up to dinner wearing the stupid bunny onesie that Joey had left in his room.

“There,” Henry greeted him with a broad smile, “Now we match.”

It wasn’t fair. Joey wanted to kiss him so badly. The white onesie was a little short on Henry, pulling up just above his ankles, and it still managed to stretch at his shoulders, but it was so fucking adorable and Joey could pin point the exact moment his crush tumbled over the edge into love.

It was the crinkles at the corner of Henry’s eyes as he smiled, the slight tilt of his head, the sparkle in his ocean blue eyes.

Except they weren’t just blue. No, there were specks of golden brown in one eye, that were just captivating. Joey felt like he could so easily get lost in Henry. Every time he looked at the man he found something new and exciting.

“Darling, you look adorable!” he cooed, before he could get too distracted by the fluttering of his own heart. “Very cuddly.”

Henry chuckled and opened his arms wide, allowing Joey to barrel into them. “That was the idea.”

“So, what’s for dinner?” he asked, hoping that Henry would have forgotten that-

“It’s your turn to cook.”

“Bugger,” Joey whined. “Cheesy pasta?”

“You made that last time,” Henry teased.

“I’m very good at carbonara!” Joey countered.

“Melted cheese on pasta isn’t carbonara.”

Joey scoffed. “Eh, close enough.”

“Fine, make your cheesy pasta.”

“Carbonara,” Joey said with a wink. “I’ll add bacon this time.”

The pasta was overcooked and the bacon was a little chewy, but it was dinner, and afterwards Henry made them both extravagant hot chocolates made from actual chocolate rather than powder shit that Joey used. It was covered in whipped cream and marshmallows and had a healthy amount of Baileys to top it off. They curled up on their usual spot on the sofa, buried under blankets and held the warm mugs close to their chests.

If it had been snowing, then Joey would have thought he’d walked into a Christmas film, all it needed was a fireplace and some fairy lights. It was cosy and warm, and a little bit romantic, or it would be if Henry was interested in men and Joey was his type.

No, he couldn’t think like that.

They were friends, good friends, good friends that liked to cuddle and almost kiss if the dog hadn’t interrupted.

It was fine.

Everything was fine.

He took a long gulp of his hot chocolate to stave off his anxiety, not noticing when his nose dived straight into the whipped cream until he looked up to find Henry staring at him with a fond expression. Warmth flooded through Joey’s chest as he returned the smile, feeling high on love and sugar.

“Hi,” he breathed, sounding as love sick as he felt.

Henry’s smile brightened, filling the whole room with light and Joey could have sworn he could hear the swell of violins in the soundtrack of his life.

“Hi,” Henry replied easily as if he hadn’t stolen Joey’s breath, heart and soul. “You- umm, cream, here!”

Henry tapped his own nose.

“Oh cock!” Joey hurried to wipe his nose, almost spilling his hot chocolate in the process, “Fuck! Bugger, shit balls!”

Henry, the bastard, just laughed, his arms reaching out to steady the mug and stop Joey from falling to the ground. “I think you made it worse.”

Joey snorted “I got that, yup, thanks.”

This time he could feel the sticky sweet cream clinging to his cheek, the subtle taste of vanilla on his lips. He pouted up at Henry, gazing through his eyelashes in a way that he hoped could be played off as friendly, but also maybe a little bit seductive. His tongue flicked out to lick his lips and he barely resisted the urge to wink.

Maybe there had been more Bailey’s in his drink than he realised.

Instead, he just wiped his face and snuggled back up to Henry, pulling the blanket up to his chin. They settled on watching Always Sunny, so Joey didn’t really have to concentrate. He let the tension drain from his body as he listened to the familiar TV show and then closed his eyes. Warm, happy and wrapped up in the arms of the man he loved-

Joey fell asleep.

He didn’t notice the way Henry was staring down at him as if he hung the fucking moon and stars, or the inner turmoil his friend was plague with as Henry resisted leaning down to kiss Joey in his sleep.

No, Joey was blissfully ignorant, sleeping better than he had in weeks.

________

The rest of lockdown went by in a blur. Their routine started to seem normal and any doubts Joey had about spending so much time with Henry faded away. They bantered easily like they had on set, laughing and giggling over whatever stupid thing one of them had said. Henry would spend hours playing his video games whilst Joey zoomed Madeleine to work on their new album together. When the regulations relaxed they started to walk Kal together, enjoying the quiet summer days and fresh air. The cuddling never really stopped, and some mornings Joey would wake up still curled up against Henry’s chest, their limbs tangled from the night before.

Those were Joey’s favourite mornings. He’d be stiff all day from sleeping on the couch but he could pretend, for just a few moments, that things were more than they were.

The pining never went away but it was truly the sweetest torture that he’d ever had to endure. The domestic bliss being barely a step away from everything he craved.

And when the time came for Joey to return to his flat with Madeleine, he felt like shit. He didn’t want to go. He wanted to stay in the strange fantasy world he had with Henry, eating too much food and drinking too much wine, cuddling and watching crappy Netflix shows.

Which was why he was sat, staring at a messy pile of clothes on his bed, clothes he’d not worn in weeks. Over the chair were his onesies and a collection of jumpers and hoodies that he’d stolen from Henry over the last few months and weeks. Kal stared up at him from the floor, tail thumping against the carpet.

Joey sighed and ran his hand through his hair, trying desperately to ignore the ache in his chest that was growing more painful with everything second that passed. “I don’t know, Kal. I should be happy about going home.”

Kal didn’t respond, his tail still wagging away just like it always did whenever Joey paid attention to him.

“I miss Madeleine, of course I do, but living with Henry has been great. And you, I love you, big fluffy puppy!” He cooed with a big smile as Kal barked happily and jumped up onto the bed. Joey laughed as he tried to keep his face away from the attack, wrapping his arms around Kal’s neck and pressing his nose into the fur.

“If I tell him how I feel that’s just going to make season two really really awkward, but I just feel like I’m missing a chance, you know?”

If Kal knew, he either didn’t care or just enjoyed watching Joey suffer. There was no reply and Kal just rested his head in Joey’s lap.

“Yeah, right,” he muttered, still running his fingers through Kal’s fur. “You’re no use.”

Kal snorted at that and Joey rolled his eyes.

“But I love you anyway, yes I do!”

“Ready to go?” Henry asked from the door.

“Shit!” Joey yelped. “How long have you been standing there?!”

Henry chuckled, striding into the room and perching on the bed opposite Joey. He reached out to scratch Kal on the head with a dazzling smile. Joey felt his cheeks warm up and he buried his face in Kal’s fur to hide the blush. So many months and he still couldn’t stop his heart from racing whenever Henry smiled. He was pathetic.

And he was running out of time.

He knew it was a bad idea, even entertaining the thought of dating a co-star, but he’d regret it if he didn’t give it a shot. I mean he could always blame the mixed signals if it went wrong. They’d nearly kissed twice and Joey didn’t even cuddle Madeleine as much as he’d cuddled Henry. They were probably the only people that were less touch-starved during the lockdown than before.

So Joey was going to tell him.

Just three words.

He could do that.

Fuck!

He couldn’t do that.

“Joey?” Henry said, reaching out to squeeze Joey’s shoulder.

Joey blinked. Had Henry been talking to him? He’d asked a question so that would make sense. God, his anxiety had gone through the roof, it was like that first day all over again.

“Need to pack,” he mumbled, gesturing at his clothes.

Henry let out a long and heavy sigh, sounding just as thrilled about the idea as Joey did. “I suppose you do, yeah. When is Madeleine due over?”

Joey hummed, glancing at his watch. “Ten minutes ago. Lockdown traffic must be a thing of the past.”

“Pity.”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah,” Henry sighed.

Neither of them moved, both staring glumly at Kal who was happily nestled between them. It was strange but Joey had almost begun to think of Kal as his, theirs. Their home, their life, their dog. He would miss Kal very much.

He would miss Henry even more.

“Do you have a start date yet?” Joey asked, the restrictions were lifting and there were talks about getting back to work again, but it was all up in the air.

Henry shook his head. “Should be getting a call from my agent some time this week. I need to make sure my other projects can work around the schedule.”

Joey smirked, “Or my dear witcher will have a new face next time we meet,” he teased.

Henry scoffed. “Not a chance, you’re stuck with me, bard.”

“You still owe me an apology,” Joey shot back, not quite realising how close they’d gotten during their mock argument.

He swallowed and licked his lips, one hand reaching up to scratch the stubble on his cheek. His face was burning right up to the tips of his ears, his heart thumping in his chest. There was a spark of electricity crackling between them, the scent of coffee lingering on Henry’s breath.

“I’ll make it up to you,” Henry promised, voice hoarse and low, making heat spread through Joey’s body and the world around them seemed to disappear.

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah,” Henry breathed, the words shaky.

Joey longed to reach out and brush his fingertips along the strong line of Henry’s jaw, to feel the scratch of stubble beneath his skin. He longed to tangle his hands in the dark mess of curls, to see if they were really as soft as they looked. It felt as if there was a magnetic force pulling them closer, a string tying their souls together, binding them as one. Joey couldn’t ignore even if he wanted to, and he was over that. He couldn’t live inside his head any longer, not when there was a chance.

Hope.

Deadly, poisoning his very soul, until he could think of nothing except Henry’s lips on his, hands roaming bodies, pulling at hair, unable to resist the promised pleasures of sin. Tongues tangling. Hearts singing. One breath shared between two. Heat. Lust. Love.

Just Henry.

His love.

Joey closed his eyes and pressed his forehead against Henry’s, their lips barely ghosting over each other, you really couldn’t call it a kiss; not yet. One more breath, a millimetre to close the gap.

A horn honked from outside and they pulled apart before they could cross the bridge, past the point of no return.

Joey let out a slightly manic laugh and ran his hands through his hair, whilst Henry went back to stroking Kal as he cleared his throat.

“Bollocks, I still haven’t packed.”

“I’ll invite Madeleine in for some tea,” Henry chuckled, stretching as he stood up.

Kal barked happily and jumped down, wagging his tail as he sniffed at Henry’s socks.

And Joey was left alone once more.

“Fuck!” he groaned, covering his face as he flopped back onto his pillows.

By the time he finished packing, Madeleine and Henry were laughing away in the kitchen like old friends.

Like Joey and Henry had so many times.

He wasn’t special. Henry was just that guy.

Hope.

Dangerous and lethal, stabbing into the heart and tearing the soul apart.

“Ready,” Joey mumbled, holding up his suitcase and guitar. “Might take a couple of trips, I have another bag upstairs and the damn lute.”

“Not sure I ever heard you play the lute?” Henry teased.

“Yeah well,” Joey grumbled and turned away from the kitchen before he could start crying.

He really really didn’t want to cry in front of Henry. What was a little heartbreak between friends? At least he could channel that into Jaskier whenever they finally got back onto set. God, he was a fucking mess.

“I’ll help you,” Henry volunteered because of course he would. He probably just wanted Joey gone sooner.

The poor bloke probably couldn’t wait to have his own space back without Joey’s inedible attempts at cooking, non-stop music and chatter, lazy slobbish evenings in front of the TV.

He wasn’t going to cry.

He wasn’t.

Fuck!

Joey sniffed and stumbled out the door, his hands gripping his suitcase so tight he thought he might break the handle. Back home with Madeleine, to his life, and his bed, and nights spent drinking too much wine and lurking on social media.

He’d just about managed to throw his suitcase into the boot when he heard a loud bark behind him, followed by Henry grunting. Joey was almost knocked off his feet as Kal bundled into him, circling around as he jumped up, winding the lead around Joey’s body and pulling a poor Henry with him.

Not that Joey was particularly complaining about having Henry pressed up against him, but did it have to be when he was crying?

Henry cursed, struggling to keep hold of the lead. Their faces were close and they had to wrap their arms around each other to keep steady. Joey laughed through his tears, reminded of a similar moment from one of his favourite Disney films.

Only Kal was a lot bigger than a Dalmatian.

“I don’t think he wants you to leave?” Henry said, smiling sheepishly.

Joey smiled back despite his broken heart. “Doesn’t look like it.”

“I- I don’t want you to leave either,” Henry whispered so quietly that Joey wasn’t sure whether he’d heard it at all. “I- umm, I like having you here… with me.”

“Oh,” Joey replied stupidly.

“Fuck, I- Joey… Can- can I kiss you?”

The world turned upside down. Joey's heart stopped and everything started to spin. He tried to process the words but nothing seemed to make sense. There was no fucking way that Henry had said that, that he wanted to- wanted to…

Fuck!

“Oh,” he repeated, blinking at Henry as he licked his lips. “I mean. Fuck. No, I mean… Christ. Yes. Please. Yes.”

Henry chuckled and cupped his cheek, pressing their lips together in the most tender of kisses, taking Joey’s breath away right there on the pavement. Joey just giggled when they parted and then swooped back in for another kiss, and another-

And he never wanted to stop.

He didn’t need to breathe, he just needed this; Henry’s lips on his.

Henry had other ideas though, pulling away with a blinding smile.

“Stay with me?”

Joey nodded and threw his arms around Henry’s neck. “God, yes.”

And then they kissed some more. They had months of lockdown to catch up on, after all.

#the witcher rpf #henry cavill rpf #Joey batey rpf #Joey batey/henry cavill #Joey/henry

17 notes · View notes

astringofmadhousefloozies · 3 years ago

Text

Dorm Party

Yuu rescues Idia at a party, or Me throwing several jokes I wanted to make into a single fic.

Content warnings for coarse language. Find more in my Twisted Wonderland Fanfiction tag! And sent me an ask if you liked anything, I’m much like any other motherfucker on this website and thrive on positive feedback.

~*~*~*~

TXT: yuu help me i got waylaid by extroverts

You roll your eyes and reply back.

Y: aight who is it

I: music club

I: help me

Y: remember, they try and include you because they genuinely like you

Y: what are you guys doing

I: i was getting food and they took me to scarabia to eat with them

I: get me out get me out get me out they keep asking me questions

Y: okay

Y: but why didn't you say you were busy

Y: or were going somewhere

I: you ever see kalims face when you tell him no

You had. He covered it up really quick, but that half-second of kicked puppy was heartbreaking.

Y: can you eat just enough to be polite and then bug out

Y: they know it's a lot for you

I: how much is that

Y: like, a small plate or something?

I: if i eat a plate i can go to the infirmary and leave got it

Y: NO

~*~*~*~

At least the spread wasn't all Jamil's cooking. He might cook like a god, but he needed a break sometimes, and takeout can be fun.

"Alright, so when he pumped the blood through the tube, it was supposed to come through in like, a steady stream, but he'd fucked up. So there were bubbles in the tube, but when you filmed it? it came out realistic-"

"I can confirm that."

"Lil, no."

"Lil yes." He sipped at his drink. "We should probably stop this conversation before they lose their lunch."

"Aww, why." The sarcasm was barely audible, but you couldn't help but smile at Cater and Kalim. Cater was the better of the two; Kalim had gone downright ashy from shock. You shuffled through the cans by the table before sliding him a ginger ale. "For your tummy, baby."

"Thank you." His colour had bounced back well before he took a sip. "You sure like telling stories about blood."

"No, that was about practical effects. I can start talking about blood if you want." You leaned your head back. "What do you think? Should I?"

Idia, who had been using you as a human shield ever since you showed up, shook his head and went back to ripping bread into increasingly smaller pieces before eating them.

"Yuu, look at this." Cater passed you his phone. The carefully staged, enstickered selfie of a Magicam influencer, with bouncy curls and double-peace signs.

"Oh, she's cute. I love her earrings." You held the phone up long enough for Idia to nod at with a small smile, before it got passed around for everyone to coo over. "You interested in her, Cater?"

"Ah, some. We've been chatting." He looked a bit dreamy, thinking on it. "We're going to try and meet up next break and see how we like each other in person."

You smiled. "Good luck, dude. She's definitely your type."

He laughed. "I do like them very cute, don't I?"

"You do, yeah." You turned to Kalim. "What do you like in someone? You probably have a type."

Kalim leaned back and thought on it. "I really like... Shining dark eyes and silky flowing hair."

You managed to disguise a snicker as a cough. "Tall and elegant, too? Always looking out for you?"

He looked up in wonder. "How'd you know?"

"Just a guess."

Lilia chimed in, full of mischief. "What about you, Idia?" You felt him stiffen in surprise against your back. "What do you like?"

"He likes 2D girls." He immediately swatted you.

"You're not 2D. And we know your type." Lilia narrowed his eyes at you. "Tall and pale and interesting looking."

"One of many." You leaned back, and Idia immediately wrapped his arms around your waist, audience be damned. "And who could blame me? Look at him."

"Please don't." He tried to scrunch behind you, but even if you were wider, he was much taller and couldn't fit.

"Aww." Cater had such a warm smile on his face. "Love at first sight?"

You shook your head. "You have to work for love. But," You looked back at your pretty blue boy, holding you tight even as he looked away in embarrassment. "The first time I saw you, it was like you snatched the breath from my throat. I'd never seen anything so beautiful in my life. I never even imagined anyone could be so beautiful." You leaned to nuzzle the spot where his jaw met his neck, and he swallowed. "And lucky me, it's the same every time I see you. You're a blessing on my life, and every day you look at me and smile makes everything worth it."

The silence was broken by Kalim giving a light sniffle. "That's beautiful, wow."

"Way to set the bar, Yuu." Lilia had his head propped in his hands. "So, was it mutual?"

You laughed. "I don't think so." You settled back into Idia, bright burning pink. "What did you think of me when you first met me?"

"..."

"Idia."

~*~*~*~

Your name is IDIA SHROUD. You're a THIRD YEAR STUDENT at NIGHT'S RAVEN COLLEGE, and everything is TERRIFYING BEYOND MORTAL KEN. You suffer from the effects of a TERRIBLE ANCESTRAL CURSE, which makes the already fraught experience of high school JUST, SO MUCH WORSE. The only things you truly enjoy are MEDIA OF A GEEKY NATURE and your MAGITEK LITTLE BROTHER. If it were up to you, you would BRICK YOUR DOOR SHUT AND NEVER LEAVE.

But, tragically, you sometimes must leave and face the mobs outside. At any moment, you could aggro them all with the sheer sin of your terrible presence, and the teachers had no sympathy for your low-tier, introverted self, and insisted that you had to show up to some classes in person. Even though telecom had come so far! You'd think you'd have pull, with your grades, but it was not the case.

Anyway, some first years had crashed a chandelier within days of being here, and you'd only found two to tell to leave you alone forever. When you found the two boys standing with a third, holding perhaps the most wonderful creature you'd ever seen in your life, you went over to explain how it was going to go. Only it didn't turn out like that.

She - what a cliche, the new student at a one-gender school being the opposite - turned to look at you. Enormous puffy eye circles that rivaled your own, close-cropped dark hair, eyes of no particular colour, all in a soft, pimply face with a double chin. This was the one that caused all the trouble?

Her smile dropped away immediately, replaced by wide eyes and slack jaw. She didn't blink, only stared directly at you, though you, muttering an endless stream of something you could not hear as she refused to stop looking or even blink. You knew a bad time when you saw it, and fled the battle before it could begin. You only just heard a voice go "Who WAS that?" before you were out of earshot, running back to your room as fast as possible.

~*~*~*~ "A curse?" You couldn't stop laughing, and that managed to set everyone else off. "You thought I was putting a curse on you?"

"Well!" He threw his hands up. "What was I supposed to think? I didn't know what that face meant and that made the most sense!"

"You do have a... intense look when you see something you like." Lilia laughed. "It reminds me a bit of Howl sometimes."

Kalim added, "No, it's more like she wants to eat whatever she's staring at."

Idia inclined his head in agreement, and Cater made a similar guesture to you. "You're all terrible," you said, but smiled as you did.

"Lilia, you never told us what type you had."

"Oh, Kalim," he said with eyes wide, "I'm much too young to be thinking about romance."

"I have forty-five minutes of footage that says otherwise," Cater said, waving his phone.

"Alright, alright." He rolled his eyes. "I like a lot of types of people."

"You've never flirted with anyone here at school." You thought for a moment. "Well, seriously, anyways. You're real friendly and that can be kinda flirty in itself."

"That's not true," he corrected. "You just don't know who it is. But," he added, "it's not a student. You're all too young for me."

Everyone stopped to consider this, before Idia spoke up. "It's Trein. I remember when I came in with you sitting on his desk."

Lilia pouted. "He still hasn’t bit. And he knows."

You covered your mouth. "I should have known you're a geezerfucker."

"I don't think it counts if you're older than said geezer."

Lilia leaned over to Idia. "I'll tell him you said that and then no one in this room will ever get a passing grade or a playdate with Lucius again."

Everyone changed the subject, and the evening continued with success.

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland fanfiction #idia shroud #lilia vanrouge #kalim al asim

20 notes · View notes

tricewithaz · 4 years ago

Text

THOTS ON SHADOW AND BONE

Hello everyone! it is I, Trice, and i come with my thoughts on the Shadow and Bone show cause ive got many

I'm gonna divide this in what i liked, what i disliked, and what i think could have been better but didn't really bother me. Feel free to send your opinions too!

As a whole, I really liked the show and I think it's a great adaptation that both fans and newcomers will enjoy. It's super well done! and every episode had me glued to the tv even though I knew what was going to happen.

Beware this is long

To start,

What i liked

Mal and Alina

I never really liked Mal in the books, mainly cause he had like, nothing going on for him, and not having his pov made him no favors whatsoever. Alina's perception of him was everychanging, two factors that didn't make him unlikeable necessarily, but that made me not want to read about him. In the show he's way more likeable and even though he still doesn't have a lot going on for him, you can see that he's always trying to protect alina, and you also see a bit of his demeanor through Archie's acting. I think he made a great job at portraying him. And Alina! Alina who in the books was essentially a y/n sort of character (although she did get better over time), her character, likes, dislikes, her DRIVE was incredibly portrayed in the show. Also Jessie (loml, marry me) and Archie have incredible chemistry together and they sold their yearning SO WELL (and so did the kid actors portraying them as children oh my GOD)...yall...i cried when they held hands. My favourite scene was definitely when Alina took care of Mal's wounds (a favorite trope of mine). And the HURT in their eyes whenever they thought the other was in danger....i saw the show dubbed but I'm sure their voices made it beyond incredible as well, their face acting was just on. point. Overall the show rEALLY makes me root for them both individually and together which is something the books didn't manage to do.

The Darkling

AAAAA i really enjoyed the Darkling omg, incredible charisma, Ben does such a great job (and so did his voice actor in Spanish oh my GOD). His acting was just as I imagined it in the books and i loved how he could be as sweet and mysterious as he could be menacing. In fact! i liked him more than i did in the book, and i think it was a great choice to make him more human. I'm not sure if this was Ben or the writing, but i could really see his yearning for an equal, for Alina, his loneliness and his thirst for power and control too. Great love interest, even greater villain. And his wardrobe was phenomenal. I also really liked how they implied that The Darkling was a name given by other people, it was very believable that people would call someone who literally controls shade something akin to "son of the dark" or something of the sort, instead of it being a name he gives himself or his job title (both if which are incredibly pathetic and cringy to think about).

Jesper

No comments. He was just great. I love Kit.

Nina

Omg Danielle did SUCH a great job at portraying Nina, it's exactly how i imagined her in Six of Crows.

Helnik

THE. YEARNING. THE. CHEMISTRY. I didn't love their scenes at the boat but once that was over I was practically screaming at the screen to jUST KISS ALREADY. Calahan and Daniell have such good chemistry together and the few changes they made only served the story better. I did wish they had development over more time cause Matthias' change of mind felt too quick, but i get why they had to rush. Because of how good their chemistry was, their fallout also was incredibly painful.

Inej's fear of the Menagerie and her morals

Amita's portrayal of Inej's hurt, devotion and her refusal to kill (and later hurt cause she has killed) is incredibly subtle but so SO effective. She's so talented really and truly sold Inej's feelings throughout the show.

VFX

Man.....the fold, the volcra, the grisha powers.....kudos to the animators and overall artistic team cause they were incredible. Also seeing the different title animations in each episode was such a tiny detail that made me so excited and they all looked so good.

Ketterdam

Again, kudos to the artistic team, everything about Ketterdam felt so alive (and weirdly moist), truly sold a kind of aesthetic and life that is so characteristic if the Barrel, even when i didn't imagine it that way in the books.

David

He appeared like, twice, and both times were so cute and charming I can't wait to see more of him both on his own and with Genya.

The Wardrobe

So, at first i hated the keftas. I thought the looked tacky and costume, but when you see them on screen they're just perfect (although i have to say the patterns on some of the keftas were kind of...cheap looking? and the training keftas were just kinda boring. My favourite was the Darkling's. Aside from that, i really liked Kaz's and inej's clothes too. Very distinctive and recognizable (although it was kind of weird seeing Inej in teal instead of purple lmao).

And the queen's dresses. Chefs kiss.

It's...so cheesy (affectionate)

The whole show felt like the kind of movies I would watch as a kid like Harry Potter and Pirates of the Caribbean. The writing was stylized enough to make it incredibly dramatic and overall there was just so much heart behind all of it. Definetely a show to watch again and again and feel all of it, cause that's what it being so cheesy managed, to make me actually feel for it. It feels like something to watch on a rainy afternoon after a bad day....it's great okay i really enjoyed it, even (specially) the most unbelievable parts of it. And here's the thing, it's something that i think a lot of newer tv and film have lost, so this is good.

What i didn't like

Zoya

Mostly cause of the writing. Originally, in the first book, i didn't like her, neither as a character (stereotypical mean girl with no other motivation than to bang the love interests....all three of them....what's new i still think it's an incredibly sexist trope) or a person (hey at least this was intentional), but over time i grew to LOVE her (mean girl turns out to have a good heart and actually respects the mc and decides to fight alongside her cause it's what's right, without necessarily liking her or giving up her character??? AND she has strong motivations??? now THAT'S new). In the show, i hoped they would keep her mean girl nature while foreshadowing her depth, but all they did was turn her into a petty seductress with barely any screentime, and that only makes her not even a bad antagonist but just a boring character to watch. Not only that but they took away a big part of her character that needed to be developed in the next books. I wanted to watch her rivalry with Alina, her unjustified venomous tongue too, I wanted to be entertained by her and I wasn't. This was also a problem cause when she finally changed teams, and when she hugged Alina, it was incredibly unsatisfying, it would have had a way stronger effect if we had seen her being Ruthless Zoya with a big ambition. I also didn't like how we were told that she didn't like alina, or that she had a family, instead of it being shown on screen. Just from the show, all i can tell you about her is that she likes to bang people and she has a good moral code i guess. Yall, I'm so petty about this.

Kaz

So, I didn't hate him, in fact i think I would have enjoyed him if I hadn't read the books first, cause the two things that bother me about him were two essential characteristics of him in the books. FIrstly, he seems so strained, instead of the seemingly laid back, almost chill looking (even though we know he's not chill at all) Kaz we see in the books, the Kaz that always knows something that you don't. Show Kaz doesn't seem to always be in control, to always have the last word, the last laugh. Instead he seems strained, all the damn time. And I think this is mainly a writing and directing issue. And he also seems weak, something Book Kaz would never do. This is also an issue cause because he doesn't have the same presence he has in the books, the times where he is weak, don't seem as effective. Sure, Pekka Rollins has essentially reduced him and humiliated him, but I haven't seen enough of Kaz being actually dangerous for this to be shocking and for Pekka to seem even more hateable (and, i really liked Pekka, loved him as an antagonist more than i did in the books). Idk, Kaz was so charismatic and just fun and engaging to read in the books that his portrayal in the show felt lacking.

Alina's power's VFX

The little suns were cute and all but the light coming from within her was just ugly I'm sorry.

SFX

A lot of the sound design was just too stylized for the tone of the show i think. I particularly remember the sound of Mal's punches....what's that about.

What i think could have been better, but didn't particularly dislike

The Crows' storyline

And i think part of this is a consequence of Kaz not being as witty as he was in the books. Where's the incredibly complicated heist moves? the even more unbelievable C and D plans when something goes wrong? I didn't like that them getting Alina was essentially just luck, cause i didn't see enough of them being smart and quick on their feet. I also think it was unnecessary to have their storyline mixed with Alina's, i would have enjoyed watching a different heist, maybe in Ravka as well, and them incidentally crossing paths with Alina, more than i liked this storyline. ironically enough, the heist was the part i was least interested in

Genya and Alina

I just feel like her relationship with Alina wasn't strong enough, and i think it's because the show tried to make us believe they were much closer than they were without spending the necessary time in them.

Overall, I really really enjoyed the show, i will be watching it again (particularly cause i want to watch it in English) and i cannot wait for the second season omg (although i have to say, I'm scared for Nikolai)

I think that's all! I would also love to read yall's opinions and have a conversation.

#Shadow and Bone #Shadow and Bone spoilers #sab #sab spoilers #grishaverse #the grisha trilogy #six of crows #malina #helnik #shadow and bone series #sab review

18 notes · View notes

onlydylanobrien · 4 years ago

Link

In an exclusive interview with CBR, O'Brien talked about why he wanted to be a part of Love and Monsters, the fun of imagining the film's gigantic creatures and what it was like to act opposite a dog, the co-star he spent the most time with in the movie.

CBR: What appealed to you about Love and Monsters?

Dylan O’Brien: It's such a long answer, because everything, really everything, in it appealed to me. First of all, when I first read the script, I loved the world and I loved just how good-natured the film was. I loved how original it was, but also kind of like a throwback to a kind of movie that we don't really see today a lot of anymore. I loved this singular coming-of-age narrative amidst this really unique world with this really unique tone, I think too, that was balancing a lot of things. I loved how lighthearted it was, I loved how good-natured it was, but at the same time, I loved the elements of the monsters. And I loved how creative that idea was too, that this version of the apocalypse -- that to me always was sort of satirical, but at the same time, really grounded -- where monsters are what forced humanity underground and essentially ended the world. And I loved how they all stem from real-life mutations of these [animals].

Another thing I keep talking about a lot, because I do love this so much too, is you read a script about a boy and a dog trekking through a monster apocalypse for love and you go, "How are you going to pull that off live action? This is 100 percent an animation." And so I loved that idea too. And I loved the character so much too. I loved all the characters and all the chapters of the script. You see it's such a rambling answer, but I can never hone it. [Laughs] I have to write something really brief down, and sorry that you were the brunt of me not having that down yet.

That’s okay! You really do carry the movie, you're in pretty much every scene. Was that a challenge for you?

Dylan O’Brien: It's not as much of a challenge when you, to be honest, have a great team around you. And I really adored our cast and crew on this. It genuinely was like such a family down there, and I loved Michael [Matthews], our director, and it was just such a great experience. And so I think that obviously that's night and day, a difference. And honestly too, with how strong the script was from the start and how much I genuinely loved the character and just loved being him every day, I think that goes a long way too, you know.

There wasn't a ton of dire figuring things out each day, like, "How are we going to make this work? What does he say here though? There's something missing from the scene." When it's all there for you, and then it's just up to you to play with and try things, I think it's a lot easier than scrambling for something. So, it probably felt like a lot less work than it looks like just because of all the support I had.

You act opposite a lot of the monsters, and it seems like you are having very realistic interactions with them. Were they primarily computer-generated or was there some aspect that was practical?

Dylan O’Brien: Very rarely practical. I think maybe there's a couple things, smaller things, throughout that we had practical. [The] special effects department [made] the slugs on my arms, and I think the biggest one we had was the big claw that comes through the curtain in the beginning, the first one we see, I believe. But other than that, obviously the really big ones, which is most of it, it's always a tennis ball attached to a blue pole. Which is funny, and to be honest, that's just how it is, so you are just kind of used to it. The environment I think is the most important thing for me.

I think if anything too, look, if you're ever in a world where you're staring at a -- on set, I mean -- if they have a gigantic practical bullfrog [Laughs], I think if anything, that it would kind of crack me up. It's nice to use your imagination. That's part of what makes it fun, and if anything, I think that's more helpful. So it's always just an eyeline that you're having to follow and a height that you're having to keep track of to achieve the size of the monster, but everything else is then just you having fun in your own head, which is what makes acting fun.

Of everyone in the cast, the co-star you spend the most time with is a dog. How was he to work with?

Dylan O’Brien: Honestly, that was just like one of the greatest parts of the whole thing. And again, just like you said too earlier when you asked the question about working every day and what was that like, did you ever get a break, and the answer was no. But to be honest, from the get-go, the fact that I had this companion who genuinely means so much to me, that dog -- and his double too, Dodge, they were a pair because obviously they have to relieve each other every now and then -- and that little family to me with their trainer and owner as well, Zelie [Bullen], who's one of the greatest, warmest humans I've ever been around in my life. My whole first experience getting out there to Australia to shoot was dog training and going out to Zelie’s. She lives on this beautiful ranch out in Australia and has all these amazing animals, and Hero and Dodge are like the best dogs ever, and I'm just basically getting acquainted with them so they're comfortable with me. It was just like the greatest thing that I could ask for.

Some of my favorite pictures that I kept from set are when the still photographer got either me and Zelie just sitting in the grass, having a conversation, petting the dogs, or me just going over on the beach and lying with Hero and him just licking my face. Honestly, those moments, what else can you ask for? Literally, they reset me. And that family just genuinely means so much to me. I couldn't mean that more genuinely. I still miss and talk to Zelie often. She just texted me the other day saying like, "Oh, Hero just came and gave me good morning kisses." It was a big lovefest. So, the greatest screen partner you could ever have. [Laughs]

#dylan o'brien #love and monsters #love and monsters press

49 notes · View notes

melissart · 4 years ago

Text

Say One Thing, Mean Another (Kaidou Shun/Saiki Kusuo)

Summary:

Reading thoughts and reading feelings were two completely different abilities. Most people had a monologue always running in their heads, conveniently narrating their every experience. Call it spotlight effect, call it middle school syndrome, call it romanticization—whatever you called it, Saiki would know, because he could simply read your mind. But some desires were so unconscious that even Saiki couldn’t read them.

No one was more repressed than the self-deluded cram school mama’s boy: Kaidou Shun.

AO3 link:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/28999770

Read below

No one was more repressed than the self-deluded cram school mama’s boy: Kaidou Shun. Kaidou thought “first base” was holding hands, and even that thought reduced him into a blushing, stuttering, face-hiding mess. He couldn’t even access objective reality half the time, much less access his deepest feelings. Saiki couldn’t even imagine how Kaidou might handle such overwhelming emotions, given how easily at the slightest of confrontations. He once saw Kaidou cry at a convenience store because he couldn’t decide between two compelling brands of instant noodles (Best around or best in town? Around? In town? Around? In town? Aroundintownaroundintownaroundintown...) Needless to say, Kaidou was the most likely candidate to be hiding a dark secret.

None of that Dark Reunion fantasy bullshit. Saiki meant a real dark secret, the kind of revelation that could make a mute man gasp. Just because Kaidou cried when someone tried to tell him a “yo mama” joke doesn’t mean he can’t hide his feelings when it mattered the most. Growing up with a strict mother ruined his values for honesty. Kaidou’s lying was almost on a pathological level, with boundless creativity that showed in the character sheet journals hidden under his bed. He was sometimes so good he fooled himself, but glimmers of the truth shone through in unexpected moments.

It started with a fit of laughter in their lunchtime group. Nendou swore he could handle chopsticks up his nose with enough dexterity to pick up a cherry tomato. Admittedly, he almost succeeded, but Aren flinched away in disgust because he didn’t want to have his lunch contaminated by Nendou’s nose-chopsticks, and the sudden movement accidentally led to Aren’s elbow shoving one of Nendou’s nose-chopsticks too far up, which then caused a ridiculous-looking nosebleed down the chopsticks and into Nendou’s rice.

Saiki’s first thought was ew, but then he caught a quick glance from Kaidou while he was bursting into tears laughing, and suddenly, he couldn’t stop himself from exercising the stiff muscles around his lips into a smile. Kaidou was checking if Saiki thought it was funny, too, as if he needed permission to continue laughing. Saiki didn’t care about pride and certainly didn’t prescribe to any notions of toxic masculinity, but the thought of being the alpha male with Kaidou gave him a good feeling. A feeling that just felt… good.

Saiki still couldn’t read feelings well, not even his own, but he had a strong sense for logic. Kaidou was smaller, weaker, with a kind of reckless yet innocent boyish charm that made him hard to look away from at times. Anyone’s instincts would tell them that Kaidou must be protected at all costs and Saiki, with all of his godlike abilities, was obviously the most qualified person to protect him.

Again, Saiki was bad with unconscious desires. He found himself following that instinct to protect Kaidou in the smallest of moments. Although Saiki protected all of his friends (and humanity) from danger, even Nendou started noticing Saiki’s special treatment of Kaidou.

“Th-Th-The hellfire th-that the Dark Reunion has c-c-cursed me with a-a-always keeps me w-warm,” Kaidou bluffed, on an especially frigid winter day.

What he meant was that the puffy pink jacket his mom tried to send him to school with was too embarrassing, so he lied and told her the weather was supposed to be warmer later. Honestly, Saiki didn’t even need his clairvoyance to predict that. He immediately shoved the extra coat he brought to school at Kaidou. Kaidou got sick too easily, especially with the long nights he spent studying and the longer nights he spent writing fanfictions. Saiki even pre-heated the coat with his pyrokinesis.

“E-Eh? That’s for me, Saiki?” In hindsight, Kaidou was a little too eager to accept Saiki’s coat and he must have definitely sniffed it to see if Saiki’s scent was on it while he thought nobody was looking. “Ah, it’s so warm!” All talk of the Dark Reunion was dropped. Kaidou beamed at Saiki brightly. “Thank you, Saiki!”

The pure look of elation in Kaidou’s crimson eyes as he smiled at Saiki, just Saiki, specifically Saiki, gave him that good feeling again.

Nendou glanced between the two. “You brought that extra coat just for him?”

“That’s just because—” Aren started, but then stopped. “Huh. Nendou’s right. That is very considerate of you, Saiki.”

Saiki didn’t usually slip up and cause himself unnecessary attention, but he brushed it off and convinced himself he was only acting in self-interest. Seriously, it would be a pain if he had to put up with Kaidou calling him in the middle of the night to complain about his symptoms. Kaidou always called him at odd hours of the night, usually to spew some cryptic warnings about lurking enemies, and every time, Saiki delayed his sweet REM cycle just to placate him. It made no sense to call a mute man. (But it made even less sense that Saiki always picked up.)

“Saiki is always reliable,” Kaidou argued. “That’s why, when the Dark Reunion strikes back—”

Then, Kaidou proceeded to plagiarize the plot of the Star Wars episode “The Empire Strikes Back”. Saiki was too busy watching the self-insert adventure inside Kaidou’s mind to question the extent of his admiration of Saiki. Out of everyone, Kaidou’s thoughts were the most interesting to read. Kaidou’s imagination came in full technicolor, with exciting camera angles and cinematography professional enough to be entered in film festivals. When there was nothing good on TV, Saiki sometimes tuned into Kaidou’s thoughts for entertainment. Kaidou managed to distract everyone else from Saiki’s strange favor, too.

Saiki should have realized earlier how powerful Kaidou’s redirection was, effective enough to rival Chouno’s magic tricks. Kaidou was easy to underestimate, but the sheer amount of lies he told on a daily basis was proof of his true manipulative nature.

No, “manipulative” was overshooting it. Kaidou was just conditioned by his social anxiety to lie in everyday situations to preserve his self-image. Saiki knew that struggle better than anyone else, just in the opposite direction: dedicating his life to feigning normalcy. Yet, even though Saiki was the one who regularly erased memories, time traveled, and rewrote reality to maintain the status quo, Kaidou was still the one who went overboard in comparison.

Saiki and Kaidou were walking home together one day, just the two of them, because Aren usually took another way home and Nendou had baseball practice. Kaidou was filling Saiki in about the latest addition to the Dark Reunion saga, complete with a mini movie in his mind to accompany his narration: Kaidou had tamed a wild beast that was terrorizing a small village, which later warmed up enough to become his consort, but the beast had been mind-controlled by the Dark Reunion the entire time as a spy to figure out Kaidou’s whereabouts, which then led to Kaidou breaking the beast free from its mind control using his own forbidden knowledge of the dark arts and returning the beast into the wild.

In reality, the “beast” was a chihuahua that was bothering a kid, but then started following Kaidou home. Kaidou wanted to keep the chihuahua, but his mother said no, because the chihuahua probably belonged to someone else, even though it had no collar. He had to kick the chihuahua out of his house in hopes that the small dog would eventually find its way home. Saiki was sure the entire mind control fabrication was some type of coping mechanism to help Kaidou feel less guilty about kicking the dog out onto the cold streets.

Then, Kaidou’s knuckles accidentally brushed against Saiki’s and Kaidou’s internal alarm rang loudly in both of their minds:

Wrong! Bad! Stupid! Just ignore it, just ignore it, just ignore it!

Kaidou was screaming so loudly in his mind that Saiki instinctively covered his ears, even though there was no external sound to cover his ears from. All of Kaidou’s thoughts had instantaneously spiralled into a frenzy of self-loathing, overwhelming to the point that Saiki couldn’t even decipher what exactly Kaidou was ashamed of. The situation caught him so off-guard that he ended up doing what any normal non-psychic person would do—he asked Kaidou what was wrong. With telepathy, of course. It was easy to get away with using telepathy for conversation since Kaidou was too ashamed to look at Saiki at that moment.

“N-Nothing’s wrong!” Kaidou’s blushing face said otherwise and he knew it. He suddenly stopped in his tracks. “No… I can’t lie to you any longer, Saiki. You deserve better than that. The truth is—”

And then Kaidou told another lie, this time centering around a growing imbalance between light and dark forces of the universe that, according to an ancient prophecy, only Kaidou could heal with the great power sealed away in his right hand that he still had yet to fully control. He went into full detail about the brutal training he endured, the battles of wit against his enemies, the secrets he had to keep from his loved ones to protect them from evil—all of which ironically described Saiki’s life more than Kaidou’s—and how lonely it was carrying such burdens, as heavy as the world on Atlas’ shoulders. The vivid montage played in Kaidou’s mind, returning his mental space to its usual deluded state. As usual, Kaidou went overboard with preserving his self-image.

Good grief…

Saiki kept walking and Kaidou had to run to catch up and everything was back to its usual rhythm, with Kaidou’s behavior matching his thoughts again. That was another weakness of Saiki’s. He was so insistent on keeping his boring life boring that he overlooked something important.

Kaidou never actually admitted what was bothering him.

Daniel Kahneman said, “When faced with a difficult question, we often answer an easier one instead, usually without noticing the substitution.” Saiki asked Kaidou, “What’s wrong?” but accepted the answer to “What’s your made-up hero’s burden?” without noticing the substitution. Saiki wanted to protect Kaidou, but he couldn’t cross any boundaries. What if Kaidou was put off by Saiki’s insistence and gossiped about how pushy Saiki was? What if Kaidou took it the wrong way and it caused a falling out between them? What if Kaidou just started crying and all the passersby assumed Saiki had just said something awful to his own friend? There were too many risks. If Kaidou refused to think about what was bothering him, then Saiki just wouldn’t know.

It was better that way. Kaidou had a right to his privacy, which was limited enough by Saiki’s mind reading. Saiki didn’t have a right to any of it—Kaido’s thoughts, Kaido’s secrets, and especially Kaido’s friendship. He was sure Kaido would’ve been better off without a killjoy mute friend that constantly invaded the personal thoughts of everyone around him. The less they knew about each other’s lives, the easier life would be. It was a simple formula that guaranteed success.

If only life were actually that simple. The only law Saiki’s universe followed was Murphy’s Law.

Kaidou’s screaming thoughts started coming more frequently and it was always Saiki that set it off. When their eyes met from across the cafeteria, when they were the last ones awake during a late night group study session, when they reached for the same cafeteria item at the same time—screaming. Kaidou was getting better at not letting it show on the outside, but that only made the self-loathing episodes louder and longer. And still, even with psychic powers, Saiki had no idea why exactly Kaidou was in so much anguish when he was near. All he knew was that it was getting worse.

Saiki was a psychic, not a psychologist. He had to use his logic for situations like this. Kaidou felt awful around him and Saiki didn’t want Kaidou to feel awful, so obviously Saiki just had to avoid Kaidou to resolve the issue.

So, he did. He didn’t want to. He wanted to share an umbrella with Kaidou when he left his at home on purpose to avoid being made fun of for using his mom’s frilly, pinky parasol with roses, he wanted to answer Kaidou’s phone calls at 2 AM to comfort him after his recurring nightmare of drowning in the ocean, he wanted to proofread Kaidou’s fanfiction for any grammar or plot holes, he wanted to part the clouds and let the golden sunshine follow Kaidou’s every step so he never had to complain about gloomy days, he wanted to be there for Kaidou—of course he did! He didn’t know why, and he didn’t care to know why, because he just did and couldn’t because the most important thing he had to do was to protect Kaidou. He would gladly transfer schools to Siberia if it meant Kaidou could be happy and that’s all that mattered.

Of course, things never went Saiki’s way for too long. Kaidou came ringing at his front gate not too long after Saiki started avoiding him. Mikoto would say it’s all a balancing act, making up for Saiki’s intervention by having it all come back to bite him in the butt—strangely reminiscent of what Kaidou previously mentioned about the imbalance of light and dark. It made Saiki wonder if there had always been grains of truth in the lies.

He let Kaidou in and led him to his room. Even now, he could hear the tumultuous chaos in Kaidou’s mind.

I shouldn’t be here! This is stupid! I’m so awful!

Saiki internally sighed. Why are you here, then? Good grief.

Saiki sat on his bed and waited for Kaidou to conjure up whatever nonsense he thought could justify his visit. He was already used to people’s actions not aligning with their thoughts. This was no different.

I should tell him, already.

Instead, Kaidou became fixated on the first distraction that caught his eyes. “Geez! It’s so dark in here, Saiki! You’ll get vitamin D deficiency if you just spend all day in the dark, you know.” He opened the blinds.

I need to stop stalling and tell him, already.

Opening the blinds ended up spreading dust everywhere. Kaidou sneezed. “When was the last time you cleaned, Saiki? It’s so dusty!”

Why am I stalling even more! I really need to get it over with and tell him that… Or maybe it’s better not to tell him?

The suspense was killing Saiki. He knew he wasn’t entitled to Kaidou’s thoughts, but he was so used to knowing everything about everyone that he couldn’t handle the suspense anymore. Why couldn’t Kaidou trust the safety of his own mind to directly think about what he wanted to say? It made no sense! Nothing made sense, anymore! Good grief, tell me WHAT?

“What?”

Oops. Saiki accidentally sent that thought telepathically in frustration.

Tell me what your day was like, I mean.

“Oh. Um…” Kaidou sat down next to Saiki. But not too close. “Nothing really happened, actually.”

That’s a first.

“Can I tell you a story, though?”

Saiki hoped it wasn’t another plagiarized episode of Star Wars. Go ahead.

“So, I have this friend, with a problem…”

Saiki wondered why Kaidou wouldn’t refer to the friend by name, given they had the exact same circle of friends, but Kaidou was too busy admiring the particles of dust glimmering in the rectangles of sunlight filtering through the blinds. He compared the dust particles to the yellow glow of fireflies dancing in a forest, then to the twinkling stars against violet-blue cosmos, then to the grains of sand slipping through an hourglass. He thought of the various colored pieces that made up the image in stained glass windows and the tiny paint dots in Impressionist paintings and the fact that everything was just a collection of the same subatomic particles under a powerful enough microscope. He felt small. Too small to say what he means.

“... This friend is scared all the time. Maybe he’s just used to being scared because his mom always yells at him for the slightest of mistakes and has high expectations he can never reach. He doesn’t know, and neither do I, but that fear keeps leaking into everything he does. Like an inky black stain, blotting out everything until there’s nothing left. There’s just—so much ink.”

Kaidou’s fists are clenched at his sides. Saiki knew this story about Kaidou’s friend must pain him to tell, but still, Kaidou’s thoughts betrayed nothing. Kaidou was thinking of how much warmer the room was with the sunlight pouring in. He thought of temperature like mercury, pouring into the room through a crack in the window, silvery-white liquid with shiny ripples that poisoned everything in contact, suffocating them in metallic vapors.

“But, when this friend is around a certain friend, he feels like everything is bright again. It’s such a precarious feeling though, because getting closer to that brightness also puts the ink closer. It makes him think that him and the ink are the same and that anything good he touches will only get stained.”

Kaidou blinked away wetness on his lashes. He briefly acknowledged the dull ache of his heart wrenching, but only as a passing thought as he reminisced at the last time he was alone with Saiki in his room, which was after a festival, then went on to recall the fireworks. Crimson bursts of chrysanthemums popped into the night sky, golden sparkles crackling below, then streams of white and orange whistled. The smell of gunpowder and sulfur mixed in with the aroma of fried food from the concessions.

He remembered how loud the fireworks were, deep booms that resonated into his chest, louder than the pounding of his heart as he stole a glance at Saiki. He loved watching the different colors of light flash onto Saiki’s expression, a rare look of serenity, but the moment was too brief. Saiki could always tell when he was being looked at, even from far away, almost as if he were actually psychic, and every time, Saiki would look him right in the eyes and smile like he knew exactly what Kaidou was thinking, then purposefully look away again so Kaidou could resume staring in peace. That was the beautiful brightness Kaidou was enchanted by.

Saiki was used to seeing a glamorized distortion of himself in the mind’s eye of people who had a crush on him, complete with shoujo sparkles and iridescent bubbles and blooming roses in the background, but Kaidou’s perspective was unfiltered. Kaidou saw Saiki exactly the way he existed in his life and that was already enough to make his heart skip a beat, no romanticized fantasies needed.

“My friend’s problem is that he’s selfish. He wants to be with that precious friend, who makes everything fade to white. He wants to ruin everything, just for those few milliseconds of happiness. I guess, what I want to say is…”

Kaidou’s thoughts suddenly went silent. Saiki wondered if he had lost his powers, somehow. The usual background noise of every thought within a 200 meter radius was hushed, as if he had just slipped on his geranium ring. All he could hear was the rustle of fabric bunching up in Kaidou’s fists and his own pounding heart.

“What I mean is—do you think it’s worth it? Should he ruin that friendship?”

Saiki understood everything, now.

Is he scared?

“Always.”

Then, I don’t think he should.

“You’re right...”

Saiki’s hand brushed against Kaidou’s, except this time, it was on purpose. He clasped his hand over Kaidou’s.

I’ll ruin it for him.

Saiki brushed a tear away from Kaidou’s cheek. He couldn’t stop himself from smiling fondly. He usually avoided prolonged eye contact at all times so he could get away with telepathic conversation, but Kaidou had always been hard to look away from. That was a cute expression he had on his face, right now—warmed by a blush, with those shining red eyes peering up at Saiki under his long lashes.

Saiki met his lips with Kaidou’s, fingers interlaced. It was just a gentle first kiss—sweeter than coffee jelly, warmer than pyrokinesis, softer than Saiki’s bed. Kaidou melted into the kiss and could only think of how the milliseconds passed like centuries, like he was an immortal witnessing several lifetimes of glory. Their friendship was ruined, but their romance had only started.

They eventually had to part, for air. Saiki looked straight into Kaidou’s gaze. He couldn’t get out of using his real voice, but he didn’t mind.

“What I mean is... I like you.”

Of course, Kaidou broke into a sobbing mess right then and there. It didn’t take a psychic to predict that.

“I like you too, Saiki!”

#saiki no psi nan #kaidou shun #saiki kusuo #kaidou x saiki #saiki x kaidouu #wtf is their ship name #kaidou shun/saiki kusuo #fanfiction #cross-posted on ao3

25 notes · View notes

you-did-well-moon · 5 years ago

Text

Seventeen reaction to idol! s/o crying during an emotional performance

Type: Fluff/Angst

A/n: I don't know if you guys know just how much I love writing idol au’s. They’re always fun for me to create and imagine. I promise the next reactions will be much fluffier, I really did try to make this reaction as happy as I could. Some songs are in English while others are in Korean, but they all mean a lot to me. I asked people for songs, researched, got some from my own playlist. I totally didn’t cry looking at songs for this reaction. Thanks anon for requesting. Please don’t be afraid to talk to me or to request!!~Moon

TW : mental illness, curse words, insecurities, self-depreciating, mentions of suicide

in this reaction it is assumed the public knows about your relationship

S.Coups

Song: Breathe - Lee Hi

“It’s alright if you run out of breath No one will blame you It’s okay to make mistakes sometimes Because anyone can do so Although comforting by saying it’s alright Are just words”

The song you were singing was made to comfort someone going through a hard time. To tell them it's okay to slow down a bit and be human. You had repeatedly told yourself you wouldn't cry during the performance, but in the end, emotion overwhelmed you. Singing the lyrics of the songs you had always wished there was someone to say those words to you. Now, you were singing them to thousands of people who had stories and scars of hurt and pain that would always follow them no much how fast they ran away.

You were proud to be able to give them comfort, and you embraced the tears with open arms knowing you were just as human as the crowd in front of you crying the same tears alongside you. With the live orchestra behind you, the back round of a star dotted sky, and your mic clutched in your hand, you raised your chin high as you felt the tears traveling down the slope of your nose.

Seungcheol wouldn't even notice he was crying, and he would not notice the cameras filming him. He wouldn't notice the crowd’s “aaw” when his distraught face showed up on the screen. He could only focus on you. Seungcheol’s heart would sink deeper at each tear that dripped off your chin. His knee bounced with the anticipation of running to you and comforting you. When he did get to you, he took one look at your shaky hands paired with shiny eyes, and he rested his forehead against yours kissing your eyelids staying in that position until he was sure you weren't in such a sensitive state as you were on stage.

“You shouldn't cry when i’m so far away. How will I wipe your tears away then?”

Jeonghan

Song: Little Me - Little Mix

“I'd tell her to speak up, tell her to shout out Talk a bit louder, be a bit prouder Tell her she's beautiful, wonderful Everything she doesn't see You gotta speak up, you got to shout out And know that right here, right now You can be beautiful, wonderful Anything you want to be Little me”

This stage was a bit different than what your group was used to. You had partners in the form of 14-15 year old girls supposed to represent the younger selves of your group. All the time you had spent with your partner practicing led to the growth of a bond. Rayul had come to open up to you with some of her insecurities, and you had never failed to comfort her. You had grown fond of her. You saw yourself in her too much for you not to grow close to her. Now as you and Rayul moved as one on the stage, and you looked into her trusting eyes, you couldn't help but get emotional.

As you cried, you hoped that no harm would come to your younger friend, but in the world you lived in, that wouldn't happen. It was the same world you grew up in, and you knew the world would to everything it could to break that little girl down. Rayul had a worried look in her eyes, but she kept dancing. At the end of the performance, you made sure to hug her tight apologizing in your head for all the hurt she would have to go through.

As Jeoghan watched you power through the performance with tears tracing lines down the contours of your face, he teared up. He was able to blink them back, but the camera caught his furrowed eyebrows and glinting eyes. Jeonghan was so used to you always being mature and competent that seeing your tears always managed to take him by surprise. Even then, Jeonghan couldn't stop the wobbly smile from slipping out at the fact that you still looked as fierce as ever on stage while crying. After the performance, he found you looking sadly at the mirror, and he back hugged you placing his chin on your shoulder. He would whisper words of praise and soft teasing into the crook of your neck

“You did as amazing as always love. Even crying through half the performance can’t stop your talent.”

Joshua

Song: I - Taeyeon

“But strong girl, you know you were born to fly Tears you’ve cried, all of the pain you’ve felt for the day you’ll fly even higher, It’s to prepare you. Butterfly, Everybody’s gonna see it soon”

You were fully prepared to cry, and you embraced the tears with open arms using them to make the performance more effective and sincere. The story of the song was one of losing and gaining. A story of a butterfly gaining enough courage and breaking free from the cocoon of pain trapping it to finally fly along the liberating expanse of the horizon. Throughout most of the performance you were dressed in oversized dark clothing until the last chorus came, and your backup dancers ripped away the somber clothing to reveal a more colorful outfit.

As the song came to an ending, you reached your hands up to the sky when the backup dancers lifted you up, and you cried tears of happiness. Smiling brightly at the sky, you didn't mind the tears. You felt peaceful. After everything, you were still here. Still alive. Still smiling and laughing, and you weren't alone anymore. All the days on an empty stomach and all the late night dance practices weren't enough to rob you of your dreams. In the end, you were stronger and better. You were gently put down, and you smiled softly at the camera before disappearing backstage.

Joshua would have the fondest look in his eyes. Many fans would be making GIFs of the expression on his face because the moment was too sweet not to share and remember. Josh couldn't stop himself. He was just so proud. When he first met you, you were always cautious and scared of taking risks. As time progressed, trust in both yourself and what you do increased. You had come a long way, and he had been there for it all. He tried not to bring attention to himself, but he thought you deserved the standing ovation. Meeting you backstage he would smile at you as he walked towards you calling your name softly. He shrugged off his jacket wrapping it around your shoulders before tugging at the ends of it to bring you closer to him so he could place a kiss on your forehead. He would probably crack a lame joke. Or two...

“You really should be an actress babe, because you made half the stadium cry. The Oscars don't know what they're missing out on.”

Jun

Song: Home - Machine Gun Kelly X Ambassadors X Bebe Rexha

“Now tell me: how did all my dreams turn to nightmares? How did I lose it when I was right there? Now I'm so far that it feels like it's all gone to pieces Tell me why the world never fights fair I'm trying to find Home A place where I can go To take this off my shoulders Someone take me home Someone take me”

This song was the result of a collaboration with Mark lee and Jackson Wang. You had all been sitting at the studio awkwardly with no ideas for songs until you bought up a common factor between the three of you. All of you were not from Korea with Jackson being from China, Mark being from Canada, and you coming from (country). Your nervous habit of spewing random facts in awkward situations ended up in your little group talking about all the homesickness and nights crying yourselves to sleep after having to say goodbye to your families. Which ultimately ended up in a song. All the memories of missing your families had to be dug up, but you were able to comfort each other through the song. The song ended up being such a hit that you guys were asked to perform it at an awards ceremony.

You were a bit hesitant as first. Even releasing such a personal song was unnerving to you. Now you had to perform it? You had to sit yourself down and think about all the people in that audience who would find comfort in the song missing their homes or maybe still searching for one. You were able to pull through, but you hadn't been told they collected childhood pictures from all of you and were to display them on the back round set up. The song was already an emotional one, so when you turned around to a picture of yourself in your parent’s arms, you chocked up. At the end of the song the three of you met at the center of the stage, and Mark awkwardly pat your shoulder while Jackson put his arm around your shoulder tears also streaming down his face. You held the mic up to your mouth telling your parents you loved them before walking backstage with your arms on the boy’s shoulders and a peaceful smile on your face.

Jun would try hard to keep his tears at bay, but seeing his girlfriend cry while singing a song about trying to find home really did a number on him. Seeing the childhood pictures of you and the guys would make him remember his own infancy, and how much he missed his family and home some days. He tried to hide his tears from the camera by bowing his head, but he wanted to keep watching your performance. Jun never liked seeing you cry, but in that moment he understood just how much he really cared for you and how serious your relationship was. This was no normal “fling”. Seeing you backstage he would chuckle awkwardly wiping your tears away and trying to lighten up your mood.

“You send me a meme of myself crying to your song, and I won’t talk to you for three weeks. You just had to go and make an emotional song didn't you?”

Hoshi

Song: Black - Lee Hyori

“I dyed my hair to deny myself The red lipstick hid my pursed lips The thing that shook behind The colored lens It was me who didn’t want to be me”

Of course you knew what you were signing up when you decided to be an idol, but even all the years of training weren't enough to prepare you for the emotional toll it would have on you. Having to constantly put up a façade and be someone you’re not had led you astray and wandering down a path of identity confusion. You had come to rely too heavily on the dye, the contacts, the makeup, and the stage outfits. Sitting down to write this song, you were horrified at how you had been so eager to throw yourself away to appease someone who you had never met. How heavily you denied yourself in favor of “earning” the love of the industry. Someone can only take seeing a stranger in the mirror so many times.

You had sat down with your company talking about the idea for the song, and surprisingly, they agreed. Now standing on stage with millions of eyes on you, you felt free. You felt confident, like a weight had been taken off your shoulders. Your natural hair color flew along with you as you danced. Your eyes were your normal color, and the makeup on your face was natural. The stylists had even let you choose your own stage outfit. You knew the fans accepted you for the your idol self, but would they accept you for who the real you? For the first time in years, you didn't feel like a stranger to your own body and mind. That thought was what bought you over the edge, and soon, there were tears streaking down your face.

Soonyoung would try being funny at first. When the camera came near him, he would solemnly shake his head pretending to wipe a tear away. But as your performance progressed and you started crying, his previous actions would come back to slap him in the face. Not only did he feel bad for joking around at your emotional stage, but he was now sobbing into Dokyeom’s shoulder. He was proud. You were finally putting your foot down after years of ignoring who you were under all the makeup and hair dye. After all the times he had told you the real you was just as important as who people want you to be, he was glad you had finally come to see the truth in his words. He saw you backstage looking into a mirror with worry etched all over your face. Wrapping his arms around your waist he would rest his forehead in the space between your shoulder blades trying to comfort you.

“You were absolutely perfect love. There’s no way they won’t accept you, and even if they don't what matters more is that you accept yourself”

Wonwoo

Song: Disappear - Eli

“I've been feeling low, so low now Tryna do my best, don't know how Holding on to hope for life now But I become consumed with doubt, yeah Carrying the burdens of the world up on my shoulders Looking for the answers Maybe I'll know once I'm older”

You didn't make it to the first chorus before you broke down. You could hear you voice wavering from the mic, and you had to spend energy in stabilizing it as you danced the choreography. Tired was not enough to explain the overwhelming need to lie down and cry it out. Instead of waiting until you were backstage, you decided to let it all out as you performed. You were proud of being able to make music and make others happy, but you had forgotten how to make yourself happy. It seemed easier to disappear. If you disappeared there would be no expectations. No vile comments. No labels. No deadlines. You could be free of the burden of having to constantly seek out other’s validation. You remembered once being a hopeful girl with dreams bigger than people’s expectations.

Now you were always shackled by doubts, and you felt weak for giving in to them. You tried your best to stand up against the voices of doubt and insecurity plaguing your mind, but instead you ended up feeding into them. You had sat yourself down multiple times asking yourself just when you held yourself to a lower standard than the voices in your head, but each time it ended in you hating yourself just a bit more. You were in a constant war with the negative thoughts circling around in your head, and you were tired of the never ending battle. As the song came to an end you let your knees give out falling to the floor as you backup dancers hid you from view of the camera, and you let out a sob that rang around the stadium.

The whole time as you performed, Wonwoo remained stone-faced. He was leaning forward elbows on his knees, and his hands grasped tightly together in front of his mouth. Although his hands did a good job of hiding his trembling lips, the camera still caught his clasped hands shaking and the turmoil swirling around in his dark eyes. Wonwoo was there with you through your good days and your bad days. He had seen you hit rock bottom, but even with his heart shattering at each crack of your voice, he believed you were making progress. He believed you would be able to stand back up again, and he would be there for that too. When he heard your sob, he closed his eyes and winced as if it physically hurt him. Seeing you after the performance, he wouldn't say anything. He would tuck your face into his neck stroking your hair with sweet words whispered into the crown of your head.

“Just let it all out love, its alright. Don't worry about my shirt. You matter more than a piece of fabric, just let it all out. You were so brave”

Woozi

Song: Home Is Far Away - Epik High ft. Oh Hyuck

“I get more and more scared I'm running but my feet and heart forget why Dreams just become baggage now My only hope is to just leave it behind and run Rushing myself to take just one more step But when I looked up, I’m right in front of a cliff I look back and all these expectations are lined up behind me It pretends to support me but it’s pushing my back I wanted to place a comma in my heart some time”

You weren't used to doing this kind of performance. Especially at an award show. It was one of the simplest stages you've ever done. It was just you with a mic on a stage. No choreography, no props, and not even a mic stand. You supposed it made sense. You were not here to entertain. You were here to tell a story. It was not a story of finding home. It was the story of getting lost and straying away to wander a vile and cruel word. A story of not being able to find a way back and instead having to grow in a monstrous society. As you walked towards the center of the stage you straightened you gray bomber jacket paired with a white turtle neck, and you tugged at your black beanie touching the hollow of your neck to gain reassurance from your mother’s necklace.

You made sure your clothes were as simple as possible. You wanted to appear as normal as possible. As human as possible. Staring out into the crowd, you cleared your throat and bought the mic up to your lips starting the song. You started strong, and you remained strong. Until you started one of the final verses. You were still lost. It felt like it had been so long since you left the safety of your comfort zone. You missed the person you used to be. You missed knowing who you were. You missed many things you would not know the comfort of for a long time. It started with you getting choked up. Then your vision blurred, tears hugging the corner of your eyes, and they slid down your cheek past your trembling lips to your jaw.

Jihoon had to bow his head every now and then to stop himself from getting too emotional. He would unconsciously nod his head at your lyrics relating to them. He teared up, but he wouldn't cry. His eyes would have a noticeable somber shine. He had actually been there when you were first producing the song, and he was also there when you were adding the final touches to it. He remembers with a heavy heart having to calm you down when you started worrying about whether the song was too personal and real or not. You worried you would get backlash for trying to be too personal with your fans, and he told you to stop thinking that way even helping you improve the song. Seeing you backstage, he wouldn't say much. He would stay by your side with your hand in his, and you leaning into him.

“It’s okay to cry y/n. You worked hard, and you did amazingly well”

Song: Scars To Your Beautiful - Alessia Cara

“She has dreams to be an envy, so she's starving You know, covergirls eat nothing She says "beauty is pain and there's beauty in everything" "What's a little bit of hunger?" "I can go a little while longer," she fades away She don't see her perfect, she don't understand she's worth it Or that beauty goes deeper than the surface, oh, oh So to all the girls that's hurting, let me be your mirror Help you see a little bit clearer the light that shines within“

Although this performance was riddled with a deeper meaning, your outfit was still fun and colorful. With a white crop top, some ripped shorts, and some boots that went up to your knees. The most important, and difficult, part of your outfit was the pink blindfold that covered your eyes. You had to practice for weeks, and even then, some of the younger girls that would be dancing with you would help guide you across the stage when they needed to. Everything had been going fine and smoothly until the bridge of the song came on and a choir of young boys and girls sang along with you. You started tearing up, but no one could see it because of the blindfold. The song started to come to an end, and the girls led you to the center of the stage where they had set up a mirror.

You took away the blindfold smiling brightly at yourself in the mirror. That's when the tears started slipping out no matter how much you blinked to hold them back because for once in your life, you didn't feel any repulsion at yourself looking at your reflection. You had dealt with the insecurities of almost every young girl your whole life. As if the numbers on the scale defined you, you came to starve yourself and pinch at the fat that seemingly clung to your body. It wasn't until you were an adult that you really started to come to terms with your body liking it just how it was. Smiling fondly at your reflection you bowed to the audience before walking off the stage.

Seokmin couldn't help the small smile that tugged at his lips at the sight of your performing. He would have a tender look etched on his face. Seokmin couldn't help but get a bit worried at you not being able to see as you danced, but a small part of him would feel prideful. Seeing your tears at the end of your performance even if you were smiling would be enough for a tear or two to slip out, but much like you, he was still smiling brightly. Being someone who was also riddled with insecurities his smile would falter a bit, but he also felt a sense of appreciation for you for having spoken about an issue many people struggled with. Seeing you after your performance, he would immediately take you into his arms joking around and laughing when you accidentally tripped on his foot almost sending both of you crashing to your ground.

“I can't believe- how did you trip with clear vision, but you didn't trip on stage with that blindfold on huh?? Are you living in some kind up reverse world- Yah!! Don't walk away from me young lady”

Mingyu

Song: Human - Zico

“I keep lowering my head these days When did I last look up to the sky? The blurred world is filled with dust Because people like me struggled, yeah We always say, later, for the later Without my skipped birthdays I’m still in my teens As I grow old, I'm afraid of imagination A slide starts to look like a hill”

It was safe to say you were mad. Fuming. Enraged. Or as other people would call it, “acting problematic”. You were angry and tired of people constantly thinking they could define you, or that they had any say on how you should live your life. There was always something wrong with you, and you were exhausted of always having to change yourself for other’s standards on what they thought was best for you. You found yourself living a life you came to hate because other people were always telling you who should be. You came to forget the person you wanted to be. You always kept your mouth shut and your head lowered staying quiet when people tried defining who you were, but you had enough of it.

You firmly told yourself things would get better if you just put up with it, but they never did. You put your foot down. You just wanted your life back. Now you had been invited to perform the song at an award show, and although the song was set in a melancholy song, you found yourself feeling absolutely livid. Your hands were trapped in shackles and throughout the whole performance your eyebrows were furrowed, and your face held a bitter expression. When you cried, they weren't tears of sadness. They were tears of frustration. At the end of the song you shook your shackled wrists and broke the shackles glaring at the camera before walking off the stage.

Mingyu’s lips would tug upwards when he first saw you on stage, but he would immediately purse his lips when he realized what song you were performing. He knew how much the song meant to you, especially when he had seen how much you had lost yourself in the battle between who others wanted you to be and who you wanted to be. He knew how much you had doubted yourself, and he had always tried to cheer you up, but he knew you could never be happy until you started focusing on what you wanted for yourself. Ever since you had written the song, confidence in yourself had surged and the foundation of faith in yourself and what you could do was stronger than ever. Mingyu had even given you the nickname “firecracker”. Seeing your tears and your cold eyes he would feel like his air supply was cut off because you were upset, and he wasn't there to help you. Seeing you backstage and would grasp both your hands in his and sincerely look into your eyes trying to comfort you.

“You’re free now firecracker, they can't control you anymore because you won’t let them. You've come so far, and I couldn't be prouder angel.

The8

Song: Broken - Anson Seabra

“Am I broken? Am I flawed? Do I deserve a shred of worth or am I just another fake, fucked up lost cause? And am I human? Or am I something else? 'Cause I'm so scared and there's no one there To save me from the nightmare that I call myself”

You were horrified. Your fans and Minghao knew you would be releasing a new song. They just thought it would be one of your usual songs. A happy and bubbly song with an energetic choreo. This song was far from happy, and it would be released at the same time you were performing it, so people could be surprised instead of already knowing what to expect. This would be a water performance too, and the choreography was the first contemporary dance you would do for one of your title tracks. The dance was more anguished and solemn than any of your other choreographies. The whole reason you were turning a new leaf was because you hadn't been feeling like yourself lately. When you were once so sure of yourself, you had begun questioning yourself.

You felt numb. Some days you couldn't feel anything. Not the warmth of happiness in your chest. No sadness to burden your heart. No anger to cloud your mind. It was always just empty. You began to feel like someone less than human because with an empty heart and soul, what were you? You were also nervous because with how hectic your schedules had been, you didn't have a chance to tell Minghao you weren't feeling mentally well, and you knew he wouldn't be too happy finding out like this. As the performance ended, you fell to your knees grasping at your neck and breathing raggedly. You couldn't help but cry feeling helpless and acting like you were drowning before letting your body fall into the water. The stadium went dark giving you a chance to run backstage.

Minghao would shift in his seat slightly leaning forward when he noticed you were performing. His features softened slightly at first glance, but his eyebrows would furrow and his eyes would narrow when he noticed this song was vastly different than any of your previous works. He would realize the sad situation you were in that he was seemingly was too busy to take notice of. The cameras would catch the corners of his lips curled down and the shaking of his head. Although he looked pissed off on the outside, he was panicking on the inside. When he saw the tears making their way down your face and your body fall, the only thing he could think of was being there to catch you. He wouldn't hesitate to make his way backstage immediately after the lights he went out. Upon seeing you he could bring your face into the crook of his neck lowly murmuring comforting words into your ear.

“No matter how many times you fall, I'll catch you. No matter how many times you cry, I'll cry with you. No matter how many times you laugh, I'll laugh with you. I will always have your back, just let me in.”

Seungkwan

Song: She’s In The Rain - The Rose

“She’s in the rain You wanna hurt yourself I’ll stay with you You wanna make yourself go through the pain It’s better to be held than holding on No whoa“

The stage was a bit uncomfortable, but you were willing to sacrifice a bit of your comfort if it meant performing a song many needed to hear. Before going on stage, the stylists had soaked your stage outfit in water to make it look like you had been the victim of a harsh downpour making the clothes stick to your skin. They has also made your hair look like it was wet, and your makeup was a bit smudged around the edges of your eyes. You had fun with the choreography since it included an umbrella, but you were more focused on singing the song hoping you could deliver the message of the song clearly and efficiently. The making of the song was centered around making people understand it was okay to rely and confide on others. You knew how tiring it was to go through bad days without anyone to hold your hand through it.

You believed you would come out of it stronger if you handled your demons alone, but at the end of the day it left you exhausted. You had been one of those people once. Then you met Seungkwan, and he managed to worm his loud jokester self into your heart. When he witnessed you having a break down, you fought him when he tried hugging you, but you eventually let yourself get comforted by him. It started with Seungkwan, and eventually you were letting yourself lean on people when it got particularly hard. As the song came to an end, you clutched your umbrella knowing people in that crowd were struggling. You cried unapologetically hoping they would find someone reliable to fall back on, before you covered your face with the umbrella and walking off the stage sniffling and trying to control your tears.

Seungkwan already knew what song you would be performing, and while getting his hair done, he had repeatedly told himself he wouldn't cry. All the members had rolled their eyes because everyone knew he would be bawling by the end of the night. Indeed, the minute he saw any form of sadness on your face, he himself burst into tears. He was quick to wipe them, but more always replaced them. Seungkwan really did try controlling himself, but as he thought of how much you had grown and how you were encouraging people to do the same, he couldn't handle the emotions now crashing over him like a tidal wave. Seeing you after the performance, he would whine and playfully fight with you while cradling your face.

“You know my ugly crying isn't something anyone should see. Why would you make me that emotional. I can't believe I just cried in front of thousands of people- are you laughing at me right now?!”

Vernon

Song: You Don't Know What It’s like - Katelyn Tarver

“Let me just stop trying Let me just stop fighting I don't want your good advice Or reasons why I'm alright You don't know what it's like You don't know what it's like Don't look at me like that Just like you understand Don't try to pull me back”

At first you had strongly opposed the stylists wanting you to go on stage practically bare faced. If you went on that stage with little to no makeup, people would be able to see how much color your face had lost and the dark bags currently residing under your eyes. Sitting in front of the mirror, you jokingly thought you looked like a zombie. Thinking about it more seriously, you realized just how miserable you looked. You eventually ended up agreeing with the stylists, because you had a message to give. You were so tired of people telling you it was just a phase whenever you were upset. Sometimes you wanted to be not okay, and you wanted to let it all out so could return to your usual self eventually.

People always seemed to catch you at your worst moments, and they always wanted to sit you down and force you out of your upset stage. Telling you all the reasons you had to smile while the reasons you had to cry chaotically bumped around in your head. Why couldn't they just be there for you as you calmed yourself down? Why were they so hell bent on giving you advice that flew in one ear and out the other? Those questions rang around your head making tears spring out of your eyes. You walked off the stage with your head bent, and your hand grasped to your mouth as if trying to control the sobs echoing around in your chest.

Hansol already knew what song you were performing, but he couldn't have known how exactly you were going to execute the stage. When he saw you appear with no makeup, his eyes would widen a bit. The glumness on your face would be clearly visible. The cameras caught him visibly deflate as he took in your solemn and exhausted appearance. When he caught sight of your tears his lips would part a bit, and he looked shock because “oh my god, my s/o is crying, and I can't do anything about it right now”. Then his eyebrows furrowed and his expression would change from shocked to melancholy. He would walk briskly backstage to your waiting room seeing you sitting in a cough with your head in your hands. Sitting beside you silently, he would rest a hand on your knee and lean his head on your shoulder trying to comfort you as much as he could.

“I’m here love, no matter what, I’m here. Just hold my hand for now, tomorrow will be a better and brighter day. I’ll make sure of it.”

Dino

Song: The Day Before - Nell

“At first, I hated you a lot. I cried a lot too But after being like that for a while I wondered what in the world I was doing

Actually, it’s like this. What use is it to hold onto something that is scattering? Only the heart will hurt more But again I wonder, what is The purpose of living like this?”

You wanted to hate them so badly. When you first heard of the news, it was anger that came before sadness and grief. Anger because after all the promises and late nights talking, they left you. They left this life and with that they left you. You didn't think it was fair. You got to live and wake up every day, and they didn't. No one had ever known you had a brother, and they probably never will. After spending all your days crying and lamenting what could have been, you had to step back and take a good look at yourself because you knew no matter how many times you cried or screamed angry words at his picture, it wouldn't bring him back.

You realized the more you tried to hold on to someone that wasn't here anymore, the more pain you put yourself though. You had to accept his departure, and you just had to hope he was happy wherever he was. You didn't want to live a life where you spent all your time wasting time and energy in something that would only tear you down in the long run. Standing on stage you let slip a small smile as you saw a sea of many light sticks waving to the melody of your song. With the song coming to an end, you imagined his smiling face deciding it would be the last time you cried for him. When you did cry, it felt like a weight had been taken from your shoulders.

Chan would hear what song you were performing, and his heart would claw up to his throat. He was sitting right next to you while you were writing the song with angry tears as you stared ruefully at the computer screen. Watching you cry almost every day, he knew you would eventually get better, but back then, watching you struggle to keep your tears at bay on a daily basis was one of the hardest things he’s ever had to do. He was tense the whole performance worried you wouldn't be able to handle singing the song. Then he saw you let out a little smile as the song ended. You had never once smiled while crying for him. He knew, that you had let him go. Now that you were at peace, so was Chan. Meeting you backstage, he was a bit hesitant, but seeing you smile brightly at him, and he would smile right back hugging you tightly.

“You've cried enough the last few days for a lifetime don't you think so babe? Let’s go eat, food cheers everyone up”

330 notes · View notes

seokjinsdisciple · 5 years ago

Text

Mine

vampire!jinyoung x reader

jinyoung enlists your help to get free blood, but he never thought things would turn out like this.

requested, unedited

warnings: a lot of blood licking/drinking, unprotected sex, non-consensual biting, one of the vampire characters wants to die, doll, pussy eating, drinking, swearing, i think thats it?

word count: 3.7k

It wasn’t unusual for there to be an unwanted visitor in your hospital. In fact, more often than not there was an addict trying to get into the drug supplies, but an intruder in the Blood Bank was new. You worked the night shift, and you often found yourself in situations that, frankly, the day shift nurses would never have to deal with. Most nights, you were unbothered, but there was something about tonight that had been...weird.

You made your way further into the dark room, your eyes slowly adjust to the lack of light that was completely opposite to the stark white light in the hall. At first, you didn’t see him. His dark clothing helping him to blend in, but as you approached his figure became more clear. As if he could hear you, even from this distance, he froze. Head turning slowly to face you.

If you had been a day nurse, you would’ve screamed, maybe even ran away, but you didn’t. Maybe you were curious, maybe you were just plain stupid, all you knew was that man had glowing red eyes. Try as you might to attribute what you saw to exhaustion and lack of sleep, you knew you’d be lying to yourself. So here you were, standing in front of a man with glowing red eyes, and the both of you were frozen.

With a shaky cough and your confidence built, “Sir, you can’t be in here,” came out of your mouth before you could stop yourself. You could see the man shove something into his pocket, and before you could protest any further, he tried pushing around you to the door, but stopped when he noticed the bright lights in the hall.

Your brows scrunched in confusion, if he hadn’t come in that door, how did he get in here?

You tried to stop him as he turned to come back towards you, but he was too strong. He scrambled past you with ease, and when you tried to follow, your arm scraped across the broken glass of the cabinet he had been searching through. While it hurt, you didn’t think much of it, at least, not until your eyes flew back to the escaping stranger. He stood, still, the only movement coming from his heaving chest. You had been freaked out before, but now, as absolute silence filled the room, you were scared. He still didn’t face you, it was as if he was frozen. In an instant, the atmosphere changed, his hands recklessly tearing at his pockets to get whatever it was that he had stolen out. You were left stunned as you realized what he was now ravenously drinking from, a blood bag.

“What are you doing?” you shrieked, hurrying over to the stranger, and pulling at his arm. In an instant, his hand was wrapped around your wrist, blood dripping from his mouth and his eyes burning into where blood was dripping from your fresh cut.

“You stupid little girl,” he hissed, bringing your arm up to his mouth and smirking, “your blood smells so...delicious,” he growled, tongue running across your wound. You were frozen, you had no clue what to do, especially as his teeth were getting so close to biting into your arm. With his teeth just centimeters away from sinking into your flesh, the light flickered on. One of your shocked coworkers stood at the door, her eyes widening as the man who had been about to attack you hurried to the window and jumped out.

You stood there in shock as she rushed to you, her questions mixing with your own in your head. Thoughts swirled in your brain as you mindlessly followed her. Why the hell was he drinking blood? Who was he? Why were his eyes red? Why were you about to let him… do whatever it was he was about to do to you?

You winced as she cleaned your wound, trying to imagine how the rest of your shift would go. You only had a few hours left, and although you were shaken up, your curiosity was overpowering any fears that you had.

The rest of your shift flew by, your work keeping you busy, but not busy enough to occupy your mind. As you glanced down at your blood-soaked shoes, courteous of the visitor who had been in your mind all night, you huffed out a curse. You didn’t want to have to clean your shoes, but there was no way you would be walking around your next shift looking like you just came from a horror film.

You pulled your coat closer to your body as you walked out of the hospital. You were used to walking home, you had been doing it for a while, but you never got used to the bone-chilling wind that happens at 3AM. As you walked, you felt eyes watching you, your apartment wasn’t far now, and although you felt a little creeped out, you were sure it would pass. Your heart started beating faster as you heard footsteps fall in time with your own. You glanced into the window of a shop as you passed, but there was no one behind you. You tried to shake the eerie feeling that you were being followed, but your fears just rose.

It wasn’t until you passed an alleyway that your worst fears were imagined. A hand pulled you hard, as another covered your mouth, effectively muffling your scream. You tried to fight as the man pushed you against the wall, but his strength was far greater than anything you had ever encountered.

You watched helplessly as he ripped your coat and bandage off, “You don’t realize how dangerous it is to be walking around with blood that smells that good.”

At this point, you were just baffled, what were the odds of getting attacked twice in one night by two different people who were both obsessed with blood. You saw his eyes go red, and when he saw your unfazed reaction, you resisted rolling your eyes. He was confused you weren’t shocked to see his eye change, but he didn’t know you had been through this already. You had escaped one stranger tonight, you could escape another.

As he tried to steady you enough to bite you, you wriggled. You were going to get free, you were determined. Neither of you noticed the man coming until he was already knocking down your attacker. You did a double-take at your savior, recognizing his face as the stranger from earlier. As if this night couldn’t get any worse.

“Bang Chan, I told you to stay away from her,” the man from before said as he wrestled with who you now knew to be Bang Chan.

“How was I supposed to know she was the one you were talking about?” He hisses back, rolling on top of the man and throwing a punch before quickly being flipped over again, “I’m hungry, boss. And she was walking down the street smelling soo delicious.”

You watched as the two continued to fight, backing away slowly to not draw any attention to yourself. When you were far enough away, you ran, their angry voices fading away as your feet carried you through streets and into a pub.

After all that had happened to you tonight, you deserve a drink. You sidled up to the bar, sitting in the seat farthest away from the rest of the patrons. You needed a moment to think and relax and have a drink. So that’s what you did. You had one drink, and then another, and then one more. You weren’t drinking quickly, burning some time before heading home.

As you motioned to the bartender to close your tab, a voice rang out.

“I’ll cover her drinks, and can I have a shot of gin, please,” the voice from earlier rang out from behind you. You sighed as the man sat next to you, “You really are a difficult human to find.”

You just glanced at him, his skin perfect, and face obnoxiously handsome. “And you are sure hard to get rid of,” you quipped back, annoyed to find yourself in his presence again.

He chuckled, his teeth normal when you checked. This made him smile again, “I’m a little less starving now, so I look a little nicer.”

You just nodded, trying to ignore the multitude of questions from swirling in your brain and effectively ignore him.

“You can’t be thinking about ignoring me now, can you doll?” His eyebrow quirked, a knowing smile gracing his lips as your eyes widened.

“What can’t you do?” You practically groaned, tired of every new… ability he seemingly developed.

“I’m not invisible,” He laughed, “Well, unless you include my reflection.”

His cocky attitude was starting to wear down your will to ignore him. As much as you hated to admit it, he was funny.

“What do you want from me? Besides my blood, anyway?” You asked.

He glanced down as he let out another chuckle, “You can offer me something special, something that would help me and my friends.”

You nodded at this, you figured he was talking about the blood bank attached to your hospital. What you didn’t understand was why you? There were several other local hospitals, all with blood banks.

“But you’re pretty, doll. And smart too,” He spoke, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear.

“Mm-” You hummed, curiosity still filling your head with questions, “and what exactly do I gain by helping you?”

“My protection, and the fact that I won’t kill you for refusing me,” his eyes flashed red, as if warning you to press your luck. When he put it that way, you didn’t have much of a choice, more concerned for your own safety.

“I’m Jinyoung,” he introduced himself as the bartender collected his money, “Let’s get you home, Y/N.”

He was true to his word, walking you home from the bar, and promising to walk you home from work whenever you had a shift. He left you his number and a promise that one of the members of his coven would be in touch about the details.

Days turned into weeks, weeks into months. Jinyoung walked you home after every shift, and you gave the coven as much blood as you can without drawing suspicion. Now, your system was a well-oiled one. Not as clumsy as you had been in the beginning, you were getting away with taking more and more. Jinyoung was often texting you, and in normal situations, you would have considered him a good friend. He was always touchy with you, but he never crossed any boundaries. You weren’t sure how it worked with vampire boys, but you were pretty sure he liked you.

The first time you had ever gone to the JYP coven’s base, whispers filled the halls. Things like “oh, so that’s boss’s girl” and “she’s pretty”. These weren’t the first suspicions you had, but they proved to be the most convincing. Especially because of the way Jinyoung reacted to the new fledgling calling you pretty. Safe to say, you and Jinyoung were close. So naturally, you were a little concerned when he texted you that he was unable to walk you home tonight because there was a big meeting with another coven.

It must’ve been serious for Jinyoung to abandon you, something he had never once done. You knew you’d be fine, the only trouble you had ever had walking home being the trouble that Jinyoung himself had caused. Really, you should’ve put it together earlier. You knew about the meeting, and you knew the only other coven in town were JYP’s rivals. You realized it too late, something you figured out as you were being dragged off of the streets and into a van.

Your captors weren’t cruel, but you knew it was because you were being used as a bargaining chip. You felt especially bad after skipping the last month of self-defense classes (as Jinyoung insisted). Maybe you would have some idea of what to do to be less helpless. To be less human. But you didn’t, and now you were tied to this very uncomfortable chair while you waited.

You had no concept of how long you had been in the room, it had felt like hours, days even. You wondered if the hospital would report you missing, or if they would just end up firing you for missing so many shifts.

You jumped as the door opened, a man appearing before you with your phone in his hand.

“Answer and tell him you’re ok,” The man commanded, giving you no sympathy as he held the phone up to your ear.

“Y/N?” Jinyoung's voice rang out of the receiver, “Are you hurt, what are they doing to you, where are you?”

“I’m ok Jinyoung,” You started, “They haven’t don- hey!”

The man taking the receiver and pressing the end call. “Sorry, doll, but he wouldn’t stop calling.”

The man dragged his finger across your jawline and down your neck, tapping lightly on the space between your shoulder and neck. Bile rose in your throat at him calling you doll and the way his hands lingered on you. You turned your head to avoid his touch, the nickname doll ringing through your ears. Jinyoung’s nickname for you, and no one else's.

“Ah ah,” the man tsked your wriggling, eyes briefly going red as he pressed harshly on your shoulder, “I’m in charge here.”

“What do you want from me?” You questioned your resolve to get out of this mess building within you.

The man just laughed, “You humans, always thinking the world revolves around you. I was surprised when Jinyoung brought you into his operation, though it was a little stupid, honestly. Why steal blood when there are billions of walking blood banks walking around the world? What’s really interesting though, Y/N, are his feelings for you.”

“Jinyoung and I are just friends,” you tried, to which the man just laughed. You felt the lump in your throat grow, you had a feeling you weren’t gonna make this out alive that easily.

“Oh, darling. Jinyoung loves you, in fact,” he started, smiling as his phone buzzed,” he just killed twelve of my men to come and find you. I didn’t get it at first, you are just an average human, not even that cute. But now that I have you here,” he paused, sliding a knife (that you had no idea when he grabbed) through your palm, “now that I can smell your blood, I know why.”

You tried to shimmy away from him, but there was nothing you could do as he licked the blood from your new cut.

“Why are you doing this?” You asked, tears starting to fall as his fangs started to dig into your wrist. “He’s gonna kill you!”

“Doll,” he smiled a sickeningly sweet smile, “When you’ve been alive for thousands of years, death is the best present you can get.”

Your fear increased with his words. If his goal was to be killed, he would have no care if you lived or died. In fact, you wouldn’t be shocked if he would kill you, just to piss Jinyoung off. You winced as his teeth dug deeper into your arm, his bloodthirsty moans filling the otherwise quiet room. He dropped your arm, blood running down his chin as he moved towards your neck.

“It’s time now doll,” he whispered, fangs touching your skin gently.

“Get the fuck away from her, Jimin.”

You breathed a sigh of relief, Jinyoung was here, Jinyoung was going to save you. You shuddered as you felt Jimin smile against the crux of your neck.

“It took you long enough, Jinyoung,” he whispered, grunting in pain as Jinyoung drove a stake through his heart.

You were pretty sure that the blood dripping from Jimin’s mouth was no longer yours, and instead his own. It was darker, almost black. It covered his chin and his neck. He winked at you, before closing his eyes, his breathing slowing. Jinyoung was quick to push him off of you, his body quickly going limp. You hadn’t realized how much blood you had lost until you noticed your vision fading. You knew Jinyoung was saying something to you, you could see his mouth moving, but your ears were ringing as he got you free and picked you up.

The next time you opened your eyes, you were in a strange bedroom. If the man sitting in the chair next to you was any indication of whose room you were in, then you knew you were ok. Jinyoung jumped up when he noticed your eyes had opened.

“Are you ok?” He hurried over, large hand caressing your face, “Can I get you anything?”

You looked away, tears filling your eyes, “Jinyoung…”

“Doll, why are you crying? What’s happening?”

You felt his other hand gently force your head back so that he could look into your eyes. ‘

“Jimin-” you started, Jinyoung immediately tensing at the mere mention of his name, “Why did he take me?”

Jinyoung looked away, and you were positive that had he been human, he would be blushing.

“You mean a lot to me, Y/N. More than you will ever know,” he smiled sadly.

“Will you please just tell me that you’re in love with me so that I can kiss your stupid face?” you groaned, a stray tear falling down your face. Jinyoung paused at your words, searching your face for any sign of joke. When he didn’t see one, he grinned, pressing his lips against your own.

He was the first to break away, a whine erupting from your throat at the lack of contact. This alone was enough for him to kiss you again. Deeper, and passionately. You felt his love, radiating from his cold body, your heart rate increasing as he ran his hands over your chest and down your sides.

“Someone’s excited,” he groaned, pressing a gentle kiss to your collarbone and resting his ear against the spot on your chest where your heart lay. “You have no idea how happy I am that I can hear this again. You’re ok.”

“I’m ok,” you whispered, breath hitching as he squeezed your chest. He helped you shimmy the white shirt that clad your body off and immediately dove into your breasts. He rolled one of your nipples between his finger, a moan escaping your mouth as he took the other into his mouth. You hadn’t seen Jinyoung this emotional, he was littering kisses on every part of your skin, placing more in the areas where Jimin’s bites lingered.

From your experience in the coven, you knew vampires didn’t like it when others bite what they think to be theirs. One of the reasons Bang Chan had been heavily reprimanded for attacking you was because Jinyoung had claimed you. You were his.

Your heart soared at the thought, and Jinyoung smirked against your chest, clearly reading your thoughts.

“Say it,” he growled, pressing a wet kiss against your abdomen and moving to your core.

“I’m yours, Jinyoung.”

He lost his composure then, eating your core like he was starved. Not that you were complaining. You couldn’t stay still, the pleasure multiplying from your core and warming your whole body.

Moan after moan spilled from your lips as Jinyoung brought you closer to the edge. You were begging him now, desperate to get your release. He ignored your pleas, pressing a final kiss on your clit before tearing his clothes off. He pumped his member a few times before pushing himself into your tight heat. You both groaned, Jinyoung sinking all the way into you. He let out a curse before he started moving, giving you only a second to adjust to him. The burn felt good and tickled at the knot that had been building before.

His pace was sloppy, probably due to the fact he hadn’t had sex in hundreds of years. However, he knew how to use his length. Maneuvering your legs to hit all of the spots that had you breathless. You were getting close again, but you couldn’t take your eyes off of the bite Jimin had left on your wrist.

“Jinyoung, bite me.”

Jinyoung’s eyes snapped open, his pace slowing as he looked at you incredulously, “There’s no way, you’ve lost so much blood.”

“Jinyoung, please,” you begged, your core tightening around his cock and causing him to groan, “I don’t want his marks to be the only thing on me.”

Jinyoung just pressed a kiss to your forehead, starting up his pace again. “No, doll. I promise I won’t be able to control myself when I know you are stronger.”

You just whined, but he pressed a warning kiss to your lips. You were both moaning into the kiss, and you weren’t sure how it happened, but you found yourself with a split lip. All of Jinyoung’s control was out of the window at the sight of your blood. His pace quickening as he licked your cut and into your mouth. At the taste of your blood, his eyes shifted into the red you had seen months ago in the hospital.

He hovered in the crook of your neck, whispering, “Are you sure you are ok with this?”

“God, please, Jinyoung.”

You came as his fangs punctured your sin. Jinyoung quickly licking up your spilling blood. You felt his cock twitch within you, but he was still desperately biting your chest and tasting your blood.

You knew he hadn’t bit very deep, because you were barely spilling any blood, but Jinyoung didn’t seem to care. He pressed soothing kisses everywhere he could reach. Whispering one word over and over.

“Mine.”

#jinyoung x reader #jinyoung smut #jinyoung angst #jinyoung fluff #vampire!jinyoung #jinyoung scenarios #jinyoung #got7 smut #got7 fluff #got7 angst #got7 scenarios #got7 #vampire got7 #got7 fanfic #jinyoung fanfic

202 notes · View notes

insanityclause · 4 years ago

Link

Coriolanus is a play that’s more respected than revered. Why does it have a rather difficult reputation? Coriolanus is relentless, brutal, savage and serious, but that’s why I find it interesting. Shakespeare sets the play in ancient Rome: a far older place than the Rome more familiar to us – of Julius Caesar or Antony and Cleopatra or the later Empire. This Rome is wild. A city-state wrestling with its identity. An early Rome of famine, war and tyranny.

In the central character, Caius Martius Coriolanus, Shakespeare shows how the power of unchecked rage corrodes, dehumanises and ultimately destroys its subject. I’ve read that some find Martius a hard character to like, or to relate to – less effective at evoking an audience’s sympathy than Hamlet, Romeo, Juliet, Rosalind, Othello or Lear. Yet there is a perverse integrity and purity to be found in his obstinacy and honour, which sits alongside his arrogance and contempt.

The play’s poetry is raw and visceral, quite different from the elegance, beauty, clarity and charm found elsewhere in Shakespeare’s work. The warmth and delight to be found in his comedies are absent here. But the unstinting seriousness and intensity of the play is what makes it fascinating.

youtube

How well did you know the play? I didn’t know it well. I had seen an early screening of Ralph Fiennes’s terrific film adaptation at the Toronto film festival in September of 2011. I was fascinated by the visceral intensity of the play: the power, hubris, and force of the title character; its lasting political resonance; and the immediacy and profundity of the familial relationships, particularly between mother and son – Volumnia and Martius – which struck me as perhaps the most intense and psychologically complex presentation of that bond I had come across in Shakespeare.

What drew you to Coriolanus as a character? I was fascinated by the evolution of Martius/Coriolanus as a character through the play. His arc is purely tragic. He begins the play as Rome’s most courageous warrior, is quickly celebrated as its most fearsome defender, then garlanded by the Senate and selected for the highest political office.

His clarity of focus, fearlessness and ferocity of spirit, all qualities that make him a great soldier, undo him as a politician. His honesty and pride forbid him from disguising his contempt for the people of Rome, whom he deems weak, cowardly and fickle in their loyalties and affections. He cannot lie. “His heart’s his mouth / What his breast forges that his tongue must vent.” He becomes a tyrant, branded a traitor, an enemy of the people: an uncontained vessel of blistering rage. He is banished, changed “from man to dragon”. Joining forces with his sworn enemy, Aufidius, he plots revenge against Rome: “There is no more mercy in him than there is milk in a male tiger.” And then finally, at the very end, as he watches his own mother, wife and son kneel at his feet and beg for his mercy, he reveals – beneath the hardened exterior of contempt – a tenderness and vulnerability not seen before.

That shift, from splenetic warrior to merciless “dragon” to “boy of tears”, fascinated me – and the fact that his intransigence, valour and vulnerability all seem to be located in, and released by, his complex attachment to his mother.

How does this play about politics and people resonate in today’s society? The play raises the question as to how much power should reside in the hands of any individual: a question that will never go out of date. “What is the city but the people?” cries the people’s tribune, Sicinius (in our production, brilliantly played by Helen Schlesinger). The people must have their voices. And, beneath that, I think the play also raises another complex question as to what degree any individual can withstand the intensity of idealisation and demonisation that comes with the mantle of unmoderated leadership or extraordinary responsibility.

It’s a physical role – how did you prepare for it with fight director Richard Ryan? Josie Rourke and I knew it was important to the clarity of the play that Martius be credibly presented as a physical presence. As a warrior, we are told, he “struck Corioles like a planet”. Big boots to fill. Hadley Fraser, who plays Aufidius, and I began working with Richard Ryan three months before we started full rehearsals on the text of the play. The fight between Martius and Aufidius is a huge opportunity to explore their mutual obsession (“He is a lion that I am proud to hunt”).

We also hoped there would be something thrilling about presenting it at such close quarters in the confined space of the Donmar. We wanted to create a moment of combat that was visceral, brutal and relentless. We knew it would require skill, safety and endless practice. The fight choreography became something we drilled, every day. Hadley was amazing. So committed, so disciplined. It created a real bond of trust between us.

You previously starred in Othello at the Donmar. What’s special about that space? The Donmar is one of the most intimate spaces in London. I must have seen at least a hundred productions there over the last 20 years, and as an audience member it always feels like a thrill and a privilege to feel so close to the action. There’s a forensic clarity to the space: the audience are so close that they see every movement, every look. For actors, there’s nowhere to hide. That’s exciting.

It’s what makes the Donmar special: the closeness, the proximity. Hard to imagine in the wake of Covid-19. Theatres everywhere need all the support they can get. But that’s what’s encouraging about National Theatre at Home. It’s keeping theatre going, but it’s also a reminder that the sector will need real support to stay alive: from the government and from us, the people who love and cherish it.

There is a rather bloody shower scene – what are your memories of that moment? I remember that the water was extremely cold. But I was always grateful, because the preceding 20 minutes – scurrying up ladders, down fire escapes, into quick changes and sword fights – had been so physically intense that the cold water felt like a great relief. Martius says to Cominius just moments beforehand: “I will go wash / And when my face is fair you shall perceive / Whether I blush or no.” So I washed.

The scene did have a thematic significance. So much of the play, and the poetry of the play, is loaded with references and characters who are obsessed by the body of Martius as an object: how much blood he has shed for his city; how many scars he bears as emblems of his service. His mother, Volumnia (in our production played with such power and clarity by Deborah Findlay), says in a preceding scene that blood “more becomes a man than gilt his trophy”. Later, during the process of his election to the consulship, to the highest office, Martius is obliged by tradition to go out into the marketplace and display his wounds, in a bid to court public approval; to win the people’s voices. Martius refuses, in contempt for both practice and people.

In the shower scene, Josie wanted the audience to be able to see the wounds that he refuses to show the people later on, but we also wanted to suggest the reality of what those scars have cost him privately. We wanted to show him wincing, in deep pain: that these wounds and scars are not some highly prized commodity, but that beneath the exterior of the warrior-machine, idealised far beyond his sense of his own worth, is a human being who bleeds.

It’s an intense performance, in a three-hour play. How did you unwind after the show? My first thought is that I was always unbelievably hungry. Thankfully, Covent Garden is not short of places to buy a hamburger. I will always be grateful to all of them.

How did you modify your performance for the NT Live filming? The whole production for NT Live was very much the same as it was every night during our 12-week run. Naturally, as a company, we couldn’t help but be aware of cameras on all sides, especially in a space like the Donmar. We were all so grateful that the National Theatre Live team had come over the river to the Donmar. I always hoped the broadcast would capture the headlong intensity of the whole thing. The play opens with a riot, and does not stop.

What have you been watching during lockdown? I was gripped, moved and inspired by The Last Dance, the documentary series about Michael Jordan and the Chicago Bulls in the mid-90s (Steve Kerr!). Normal People for its two extraordinary central performances from Paul Mescal and Daisy Edgar-Jones. I’ve rewatched old tennis matches, which somehow I have found very comforting: in particular, the 2014 Djokovic/Federer Wimbledon final. And – because we all need cheering up – Dirty Dancing.

#Tom Hiddleston #Coriolanus #interview #National Theatre at Home

61 notes · View notes

connorspiracy · 4 years ago

Text

Amulet You Finish || Connor, Ariana & Agatha

TIMING: Current PARTIES: @connorspiracy @detective-keen @letsbenditlikebennett CONTENT: Death SUMMARY: Ariana and Connor are out for a walk in the woods looking for something to film when they stumble upon a crime scene.

Despite Connor’s affinity toward the supernatural and loving catching it on film, Ariana found she was able to just be a young adult around him. Like she didn’t have to think of the worries and planning that had been plaguing her for too long now. That would all come to an end soon enough, but for this afternoon, they were just a pair of friends enjoying walking through one of White Crest’s many trails in hopes of finding something cool for Connor to film. While it wasn’t necessarily the safest of hangouts, Ariana knew the woods well enough to be confident against anything they may come across. The path they walked today wasn’t one that could be found on the internet. She discovered it almost entirely by chance on a run one day and it had quickly become her favorite. There was a certain serenity that came with the less traveled trails. It allowed her to relax a bit more when her senses weren’t firing off at some new sound or smell quite so frequently. It was nice to be able to share it with Connor. “I’m sure there’s bound to be something out here. Since the full moon just passed, I think I can rely on brute strength alone without becoming furry if it comes to it. I’d rather not be werewolf public enemy number one on the internet and all.”

Connor had come to White Crest just looking for content. He'd expected to find it everywhere, and he hadn't been disappointed. There was always something happening, and his main problem seemed to be that most of it was too outlandish for anyone to believe could be anything but special effects. He hadn't expected to actually find friends. At least not like this. It was kind of strange having people he liked hanging out with, filming or not, but he was even luckier they didn't have objections to his video-camera shenanigans.

He had a chest mount with one of his lighter cameras attached so he'd be able to leave his hands free for balance, but even still, it was clear Ari was much more comfortable on the trails than he was. "You're like a proper woodsie person, right? I can tell. I suppose it comes with the wolf territory." Made sense to be familiar with the woods around here so you had a good place to transform away from everyone else. "What do you usually do on the full moon?" he asked, curious.

To say she was a woodsy person was a bit of an understatement. In more ways than not, Ariana was a wolf and the woods were where she felt most at ease though her own home was starting to rival that feeling. She laughed a bit as she leaped off one of the steeper parts of the trail with ease. “You could say that. I actually lived in a tent for a while. Wolf things don’t hurt with that either. I spend a lot of time here whether it’s the full moon or not. It just feels right.” She shrugged a bit. She supposed it would be hard for a human to totally understand, but it seemed like Connor wanted to understand which was nice. It didn’t seem like he had a judgmental bone in his body which was always refreshing. “Oh, I usually go very deep out into the forest where there aren’t trails or anything. No chance of anyone showing up. Just me and the forest animals… which are admittedly delicious.” She laughed a bit and hoped her answer sufficed. This full moon had been different, but that was not of her own design. “I wouldn’t recommend going into any part of the woods on a full moon though. There’s not much in the way of control to be found for myself and other wolves.” She scaled another dip in the trail and kept a close ear out for their surroundings. Nothing smelled off either. “Filmed anything good recently?”

The woods felt as if they were becoming darker, perhaps the canopy of leaves growing thicker as they made their way deeper into the forest. It was obvious just how at home Ari seemed. Sometimes it struck Connor just how different their worlds were. There were things about Ariana he'd probably never quite understand, but that just made her interesting company. "I've done plenty of filming campouts, but I can't imagine living in a tent," Connor murmured, shaking his head in disbelief with a good-natured little laugh. "The posh London boy in me is mortified at the idea."

He nodded with interest as she spoke about her full moon habits. The camera wasn't turned on yet, so nothing was being picked up, no risk of her being outed to the world. Connor wasn't opposed to taking advantage of a situation to get the shot, but there were some things that were off-limits, even to him. He shuddered slightly and laughed at the mention of the animals. "Rabbit and venison are great, but raw? You must have a fucking strong stomach." The conversation turned back to him, and he gave a noncommittal shrug. "Rio and I did a haunted cabin. We should be editing it soon. I kinda didn't film too much during the whole Bloody Mary shit." He ducked under a branch, using the trunk of the tree as leverage to help him balance as he made his way around a particularly nasty root, knotted like ropes. "Was there something in particular you were hoping to show me out here, or are you just looking to make a wilderness boy outta me?"

While Ariana did love the coziness of her warm bed, especially considering it had been warmer as of late, the comforts most considered necessities had never been so much so for her. She shrugged and said, “It was a bit out of necessity. We were on the run most of my life, but I never really minded. Out here feels like home in its own way.” She laughed a bit at the mention of being posh. “So you’re more of a glamping kind of guy?” If she hadn’t been leading the way and sniffing out what was ahead, she would have given him a playful nudge.

It was evident to her that Connor was curious about werewolf life. To her, it had never been that fascinating. It was just who she was. Ingrained in every cell of her body. “I wouldn’t recommend it for you. I mean, even when I look like this I cook them. When I look more like a wolf, well-- Wolves are kind of meant to hunt and eat fresh. Needless to say, all around I have a strong stomach.” She perked up at the mention of a haunted cabin. While she dreamed of a cabin, she could live without the haunted part, but she assumed it was no more. “That’s pretty dope. I can’t wait to see it. Probably a good idea though. Bloody Mary was kind of a nightmare and dangerous.” As soon as he asked the question, she raised a hand to quiet him. Something off in the distance caught her ear. While she didn’t smell anything that seemed like a beast, it sounded like there was some sort of struggle. She whispered, “I hear something. Didn’t have anything planned, but figured I’d sniff something out for you to film.” She motioned for him to stick close. “Move quietly and stay behind me.” She looped through the trees, following the sound of a fight ahead. They were still too far away to tell whether it was more of the supernatural or human variety.

“Give me a fancy RV any day of the week mate,” Connor said, pulling his vape out of his pocket as they walked because he had a feeling Ariana wouldn’t exactly be keen on him dumping cigarette butts in the woods. “At least have it parked nearby so I can get in there if I need to take a shower or something.” Something about washing his balls in a cold creek just didn’t really appeal to him. “It’s cool that it’s like a home to you, though. It is pretty nice out here. I just like my creature comforts too much,” he snickered. Slightly lower chance of being eaten by some kind of monster back at home, too. But only slightly.

He would have happily kept chatting away about the woods and hunting game all afternoon if not for the sudden change in Ariana’s entire body. Connor didn’t hear anything, but he practically felt the hairs on the back of her arms standing on end. He nodded, saying nothing as he made himself smaller, crouching and trying not to break an excessively loud twig under the weight of his boots as he moved through the golden and red carpet of autumn leaves on the forest floor. “What is it?” he finally whispered, quiet as he could muster. Everything seemed completely normal to him, but he supposed those were the perks of having a werewolf friend.

Ariana enjoyed the comforts her home offered her as much as the next person, but she found humans needed it far more than she did. She saw little issue with hopping into the creek the way she did the morning after the full moon to clean off. A patch of grass was just as much home as her bed was... Though maybe as of late that wasn’t entirely true. Her ideal would be a nice little secluded cabin in the woods. Those little daydreams quickly faded as she followed where her nose and ears led her. She was light on her feet and conscious of their surroundings. She paused briefly, picking the way to go and answering Connor’s question. “It sounds like there’s some sort of fight breaking out. You may want to stay a good deal back. You can still film. I’ll try not to get all ‘grr’,” she said with a little claw like hand motion.

“This way,” Ariana directed as they made their way to a small clearing. There were two men in ski masks beating up on an elderly man. The coppery smell of blood coated the air as she got close and her eyes settled on the knife. Shit. By the smell of it, it seemed everyone was human. Not that she could really discern other non-shifting species from humans all that easily. She quietly snuck through the brush and let out a low growl to distract the men. It was purposefully intimidating and she stayed out of their line of sight. One of the men’s heads shot up and looked terrified. “What the shit was that?” The other man scanned the area and responded, “I don’t know, but we’ll leave him to whatever it is. He’s bleeding out anyway.”

Another snarl resonated through the cleared area and the two men went running, not keen on seeing where the sound came from. Once Ariana could tell they were far enough away, she emerged from the brush, pulling her first aid kit out of her bag as she moved. “Where are you hurt? Who were those men?” She questioned the older man, who could only point to the stab wound on his torso.

Connor’s eyes widened at the mention of a fight. Keen as he might be to get some good footage, getting in the middle of a physical altercation was rarely his idea of a good time. “Wait, okay--I’m turning the camera on.” He didn’t want her to accidentally wolf out mid-frame, but he knew how important it might be to have the incident on film if something happened. The sounds of a scuffle were growing clearer as they grew closer, and Connor called to Ari in an urgent whisper. “Shit. Maybe you shouldn’t--just be careful.” Most of Connor’s confidence and charm went right out the window as soon as a fight became part of the equation, but he edged closer to the sounds, keeping his body low to the ground. He could see a gathering of what looked to be men, surrounding someone who was clearly in pain. The words ‘bleeding out’ stuck out like a sore thumb.

He ducked behind a bush, heart beating so loudly he was sure the camera would pick it up. He was certain they were going to come find them, to kill them just like they had killed the poor man who was lying prone on the ground, apparently, bleeding out. Once they were gone, he finally breathed again, following Ari out of the bush, the camera falling on the ground as he rushed to the man’s side. “Shit, there’s blood everywhere. Bloody hell--we’ve gotta call an ambulance.” But how the hell was an ambulance supposed to find them out here? It was no use. He’d be dead by the time anyone made it through the woods. Connor was holding his phone, hands trembling as he dialled anyway, but a pair of white hands, quickly growing colder, gripped his. “Keep it safe,” the man whispered, pushing an amulet that seemed to appear from nothingness into Connor’s sweaty palm, and then his eyes fell shut. “Ari-- Ari, I think he’s dead…” Without thinking he stuffed the amulet into his pocket, calling 911.

There was a certain panic that rose in Ariana when she saw just how bad his injuries were. Her hands gravitated toward the stab wound on his stomach and she grabbed a wad of gauze and pressed down on it to slow the bleeding. She could attempt to stitch it up here, but she had no concept of whether any of his internal organs were damaged. Would she just be doing more harm than good. There was no time for doubt, she applied pressure to the wound to help it clot, but her hands just ended up covered in more and more blood. “Focus on me,” she told the man, “We’re going to get you out of here, okay?” The more blood that soaked through the gauze as Connor spoke of calling 911, the less hope she had. This man was older and this was a lot of trauma for his body to go through. “I’m Ariana, and that’s Connor. We’re going to get you help, okay?” Her voice managed to sound much calmer than she felt and for a brief moment, she felt as if maybe she embraced some of Celeste’s essence. An alarmed look crossed her face when an amulet appeared out of seemingly nowhere and was placed in Connor’s hands. “Keep it safe? What is it?” Before she could get answers to her questions, she felt him sputter underneath her hands. “Wait, no!” She raised a hand up to quiet Connor for a moment as she tried to hear the elderly man’s heartbeat. Nothing. “He is- He’s dead. There’s no heartbeat. We need the police, not an ambulance.” At least Regan couldn’t give her shit for not reporting this one right away.

“I know, I know--” It was tough to say what was trembling more; Connor’s hands, or his voice. He squeezed his eyes shut to stop himself from crying. Jesus, was he in shock? He didn’t know what this was supposed to feel like, but it hadn’t been what he had in mind when Ari told him they could go look for something to film in the woods. When dispatch answered, he struggled to get the words out. “H-hello? I need-- police. They stabbed him. He’s dead. I--it’s in the woods, I don’t even know where we are…” After some back and forth questions, Connor struggling to explain what trails they’d been on and Ariana needing to stop in to help him, they finally hung up and told the two of them to wait right there and not to touch anything. Connor stepped back, hands and clothes covered in blood. “What… what do we do?”

Ariana stood there silently looking at the body with a look of horror on her face. Why had this happened and why was it that she always seemed to be too late when it came to saving others? The tremble in Connor’s voice as he spoke to law enforcement on the phone didn’t go unnoticed, so she stood a little taller and put on her brave face. She could do this though she needed to keep reminding herself of it. “We have to wait until they get here. Other things out here might smell the blood. I’ll be on lookout duty.” With the anxiety that was coursing through her, every sound picked up in a near grating way. As she remembered he handed Connor something, she turned to him and asked, “What was it that he wanted you to keep safe?”

Connor reached in his pocket, feeling for the amulet. He didn’t really want to touch it, and yet in the same vein, he never wanted to let it go. Something about it activated a sixth sense in him. It felt normal. It looked normal. But it wasn’t normal. He held it up for Ariana to see, almost reluctantly, but then his eyes caught sight of the black and silver object on the ground. “Fuck, my camera--” He tried to remember if they’d said anything incriminating, about Ari being a wolf. They hadn’t, right? They hadn’t talked about it on camera because he knew he wouldn’t be able to use any of that footage. “I don’t think I’m supposed to touch it.” He was normally all too happy to break the law, but trespassing and interfering in a murder investigation were on completely different levels. “How long do you think it’ll take them to get here?”

Agatha, along with two police officers strode through the woods. It had been 10 minutes already since she responded to the call on her radio. With only a rough idea of where to find these people, they moved carefully. Here was their dilemma. Whoever had done this was still around, and if they were noisy, they would miss them, but if they did not hurry, they would miss them too. On top of that, they had to take into account this very simple fact: the woods were a dangerous place. Agatha, of all people knew this much, having lost her father to the woods. Looking at the two other police officers, she wondered if they felt anguish, being stuck with a Keen in the woods. The detective took a deep breath, stopping to gain her composure and calm back. She did not need those insecurities now, or ever, and yet, after all these years, all the good work she had done, she still asked herself if she was doing enough, good enough. Minutes passed, silent, lonely. No wind, no deer, nothing. “Well, I hope that kid didn’t get his trails wrong,” she checked her map and took out her compass, sighing. “What would you say? We must be around here?” She pointed to a spot on the map and scratched at her ear. “We have to split to find them,” she didn’t like that idea, but what choice did they have? They nodded in agreement, and each one went their separate way, circling around the same spot.

Each minute felt entirely too long as the pair sat in silence waiting for the police to arrive. Ariana couldn’t stop staring at her blood covered hands that had tried so hard to stop the man’s bleeding. Just like Sammy, she couldn’t save him despite her efforts. It left her limbs feeling numb as she slumped against a tree. Moments ago, she’d wanted to be brave for Connor and the old man, but she found it was quickly fading now that there was no longer an action for her to take. There had to be something to do here, but they weren’t supposed to touch anything. Even if she started pacing, she’d risk covering the track the murderers left behind. She heard the police approaching and trying to find their spot. For a moment, she stayed quiet knowing they were too far away to hear her even if she were to call out. Once the light patter of footsteps was closer, she called out, “We’re over here.” She stood up and started to wave them over.

It was rarely a good thing when Connor was exposed to the police. He’d been lucky most of the time, not getting in too much trouble over his trespassing and filming, his white privilege and family money certainly not hurting the situation. This was different though. He’d witnessed a fucking murder, and though they had the murder on film, no reason for either himself or Ariana to be suspected, he couldn’t help but be afraid. “Hey,” he called, joining in with Ariana. “This way! The body’s over here.”

“The body’s over here,” Agatha muttered to herself, blinking and shaking her head in surprise. If only it were usually so easy. Approaching the voices, she kept her weapon in her hand, wondering who she might land on. The sight of those two college kids did seem to ease her tension, and she approached the pair, and the deceased man with caution. “Did you see what happened?” She squatted down. Her hand went to the man’s wrist, trying and failing to catch a pulse. By the state of the wounds, there was not much she could have done to help him anyway. Looking up at the pair, she frowned, and her expression did not soften as she caught sight of the camera, “you wouldn’t have happened to film this, would you?” If they did, then this might have been her easiest case for this whole year.

A detective she didn’t recognize approached them, but this was a seemingly normal crime. Minus the weird amulet at least. There was nothing to hide here. By all indication, everything was incredibly human. Ariana finally took her eyes off the body and looked at the cop that was speaking to them. “There were two men in masks, I don’t know why they--” she couldn’t think of what could possibly drive this. She looked down at her own bloody hands and mumbled, “I tried to help-- I know a decent amount of first aid and how to do-- He was dead before I could do anything.” Now that she didn’t have to be the one on guard, she felt her composure slipping. She wanted to go home and pretend like none of this had ever happened. Her eyes glazed over as she found herself staring at the body, Agatha’s next question not quite registering.

Connor tried to keep his cool, reminding himself that he hadn’t actually done anything wrong. Ari was covered in blood. So was he, but less so. His eyes fell on the camera that had caught the entire thing, pointing to it, his hand trembling ever so slightly. “We were just filming the woods, and each other, making a video for YouTube. I dropped the camera when we saw them. I don’t know how much it caught.” But given the position compared to the body, he figured it had caught a fair amount. Too much to risk lying. “He gave me this,” Connor said, holding out the amulet. “I don’t know why. I don’t think he wanted whoever killed him to take it.”

“That’s alright, you did the best you could. You could have never saved him,” Agatha assured the young woman, wiping her hands clean. With a pen, she pushed open the dead man’s jacket, to check for a wallet, a phone, anything that might help identifying him, and reaching his relatives. “You did your best,” she repeated, her expression softer. The boy started speaking, and she gave him a look. He did not seem too comfortable, and while she couldn’t help but wonder if there was something else behind it, witnessing a murder did tend to do this to people, and she decided to drop that thought for now. “I’ll need to take your camera. We’ll give it back to you, don’t worry,” she added before he could try protesting. “He wanted you to take it, then? Did he say something?” She reached out to Connor with a plastic pouch. “Drop it in there, please,” whatever this thing was, it had to be the key.

Ariana had heard the sentiment too many times to really let it resonate. Sure, it wasn’t her fault. She didn’t kill the man. There wasn’t much she could have done to save him either, but the fact didn’t change that she and death were becoming far too closely acquainted. She nodded her head and mumbled, “I know, I just… I don’t know.” There was a spaced out look on her face as Agatha continued to speak and ask questions. She remembered the man dropping the amulet into Connor’s hand and wanting them to keep it safe. But why? What was so important about a necklace that it needed to be kept safe. It’d be safe with the police at least. The idea of helping guard some amulet on top of everything else made her head spin. It was good the cops would have it. At least she hoped. She could ask Jane to make sure it didn’t do anything sketchy to the other cops. “He said to keep it safe, I think. Right, Connor?” She rubbed her hands on her arms to warm herself and became acutely aware of just how much blood was on her. Her hands dropped back to her side and she asked, “Do we need to come with you?” Everything in her hoped it was a no. She wanted to jump in the creek and rid herself of the old man’s blood that was now fogging up her senses.

Connor really didn't want to hand over either his camera or the amulet, but this bloody mess (literally and figuratively) of a situation hadn't left him with much of a choice. He swallowed, nodding. "I know. Just be careful with it, yeah? It's an expensive model." He didn't want it to go missing in police custody. "He just said to keep it safe? I think whoever killed him was looking for it, but they didn't find it on him. I..." It had been hidden in some way, by supernatural means, but he couldn't exactly say that. "I don't know why he gave it to us. I suppose because we tried to help him. He trusted us." And the question he doubted the police could ever answer was what was it, and what did those people want with it? Connor reluctantly handed everything over. They headed to the station to have his clothes taken for evidence and give a statement, and on the car ride, he looked at Ariana, silently communicating. We need to get that thing back.

#paras #with: ari #with: agatha

10 notes · View notes

pinkmoonmp3 · 3 years ago

Text

captain america: civil war + f a c e l e s s

26 notes · View notes

nightashes · 5 years ago

Text

We’re Monsters. Isn’t it Fun? - Chapter 3

Previous - Masterlist - Next

Summary: The light sides are now able to speak directly to Thomas. What does this mean for the dark sides?

Warnings: Spiders, Slight blood mentions

Ao3 version

***

The brush moves across his skin. Along his arms, past his shoulders and across his chest. Remus leans over him his tongue sticking out as he works on painting his masterpiece. Virgil lays there on the ground of their living room. A tarp beneath him, he had insisted on it, his chest barely moving. His breaths coming light and slow as he struggles not to move an inch.

“Does it tickle?”

“Nope.” Virgil answers shortly.

“Because I feel like it would tickle. You know, a paintbrush moving lightly across your skin. “

“Shut. Up. Remus.”

Remus smirks down at his brother. Bopping Virgil’s nose with his paintbrush. Virgil wiggles his nose at the bristles.

“Remus.” He warns. “You’re a jerk.”

“Oh, I know. Thanks again for helping me, bro. This is going to be awful!“

“Whatever. Just hurry up.”

Virgil can hear the back door opening, he hears what must be Deceit’s footsteps entering in on the strange scene that Virgil just so happens to find himself a major player in. Virgil knows Deceit wouldn’t object to their little project. But he can’t help but internally cringe at the idea of what he must look like. Remus won’t even let him move his head to see his work. He has no idea what state the painting is currently in or if Remus is truly painting what he said he would.

The footsteps are confirmed to be Deceit’s when he hears that familiar drawl of a tired snake parent. “Do I even want to know what you two are doing?”

“I’m painting my masterpiece! A visual display of the inner blood and guts of a human on a living subject.”

“I was bored and Remus wouldn’t stop asking.”

“Yes, well, it doesn’t look disgusting at all.” Virgil swears he can hear a smile in Deceit’s words. And he can feel one grow on his own face. At least, Remus had been honest about his project. Virgil doesn’t know what he would have done if it had been a ploy to paint something ridiculous or embarrassing like rainbows and hearts on his body. And he wasn’t going to lie, if Deceit’s comment was anything to go by this was going to be pretty cool.

“Thanks, Dad.” Remus grins.

“Oh, this is going to look sick.” Virgil interjects. And from his position he can see Remus beam down at him. Perhaps he had needed more than just their father’s reassurance that his project was indeed 'creative.'

“Right, well you two bet-“

Bbbbbbrrrrrrrrrrrrkkkkkkkkkkktttschhkkkkkkkkk

A sound ripples through them. Virgil lying on the floor can feel it vibrate through his body. His bones rattling at this deep guttural wave of sound that was somehow felt more than heard passes through. The sound petering off, leaving the dark sides staring in silence.

Virgil jolts up, staring at his family. Remus’s paintbrush lies forgotten on the floor.

“What was that?”

“The mindscape. It appears to have shifted.”

“Maybe this is Thomas finally getting rid of us. He’s gonna push our entire side off a cliff and we’ll all fall and die. “ Remus declares maniacally.

“No. This isn’t about us. It’s the light sides.” Deceit stands there. His hat pushed off-center as he cocks his head to listen to the mindscape.

“What do you mean?” Virgil questions.

“Haven’t I taught you boys anything? Listen to Thomas.”

“He’s scared.” Virgil can feel it. His norepinephrine levels are rising and his heart rate is increasing

“He’s talking?” Remus speaks. His eyes closed in concentration.

“To the light sides.” Deceit nods. His voice holding a sense of finality.

“How is this possible? What’s going on?” Virgil can feel his own panic rise in response to Thomas’s.

“It appears the lights sides are now a part of Thomas’s conscious mind. While we have remained in the subconscious. “

“Ooooo. This sounds fun. I feel like we can cause chaos with this. Can we cause chaos with this?” Remus chatters excitedly while Virgil simultaneously struggles to comprehend exactly how bad this is.

“This feels bad. Is this bad? What does this mean? Oh god, what does this mean?”

“It’s fine. We’ll be fine.” Deceit speaks through gritted teeth. “It does present a problem though. We’ll have to increase our efforts to sway Thomas.”

“What. Why?” “Ooh. Why?” The brothers speak simultaneously.

“It’s quite simple. The light sides are now able to speak directly to Thomas. They will have a much stronger pull over him. If we want to be relevant we must fight to remain so.”

“Are we going to become conscious? Oh, I have so many ideas!” Remus practically wiggles in excitement.

“No!” Deceit’s voice is hard and cold.

“Well, why not? The light sides get to do it.” The putrid side whines.

“We will not because Thomas sees us as bad.” Deceit holds a hand to silence any protests. “I know we are not bad. But he won’t see it that way. If he is aware of us he will try to get rid of us. He will try to repress us. If we wish to stay relevant and present we must work from the shadows. We must allow Thomas to believe we do not exist. For him to deny that we exist.”

“How are we gonna do that?” Remus raises his hand as if he were in class.

“What if they tell Thomas about us?”

“They won’t. I won’t let them. We will continue to whisper in Thomas’s ears as we have always done. We will increase the effects of our influence. Increase the amount of whispers. We will demand to be heard. And I will disguise the source of these whispers. I will keep us hidden. That is how we will fight back.”

“That’ll work?”

“It will have to. Our job is to keep Thomas safe. Whether he wants our help or not. And Remus you allow him to express all parts of himself. Even the parts he would rather repress. Our job may not be sunshine and rainbows.” ‘thank goodness’ Remus whispers. “But it doesn’t matter. Thomas needs us.”

Virgil looks down at the painting on his torso and arms. He could tell that it had been great. But it was now ruined. Smeared in several places from his frantic and worried movements.

“I’m sorry, Remus.”

“It’s okay. We’ll fix it.” Remus smiles. Perhaps, they could fix it.

***

Virgil has to admit, Deceit was right. Trying to persuade Thomas to do as they thought was becoming harder and harder each and every day. The light sides would sweep in at the last second and convince him to ignore them. Convince him those thoughts of his, the thoughts they provided, were wrong and bad. Deceit kept insisting that they just had to step up their efforts. They just had to keep pushing. Thomas seemed to be growing more and more exhausted. Virgil was becoming scared. It felt like it wasn’t working. Everything just kept getting worse. He often found Remus throwing all his creations at the wall, screaming in frustration. Deceit spent his days hidden away in his room, fighting desperately to keep their actions hidden. Virgil knew that if they were to increase their whispers anymore they would run Deceit ragged. He could feel his and Thomas’s anxiety increasing. There was just no outlet. Doing the “right” thing constantly was getting exhausting. But no one would listen. Virgil just couldn’t take it anymore. He felt like he was going to go insane. Like he was screaming at a brick wall to move and the wall just sat there completely unaware at the panic and frustration that racked his body. Virgil just needed to get out for a second. He needed a break. Thomas needed a break.

Virgil finds himself standing outside of Remus’s room. The door is open and the interior is a wreck. Everything inside is just rubble. All of it has been torn to shreds and scattered across the floor. Remus’s bed has been reduced to a mattress tossed aside in the corner, his “artwork” is torn down from the walls, his clothes ripped and stained are tossed dejectedly across the floor, and his dresser had been smashed to pieces. Remus himself is nowhere to be found. Not that the anxious side had come there for his brother. They rarely talked these days. Everyone was just too busy. No, he wasn’t there for Remus. It was the door, the entrance to the imagination that called to him. He wishes to find himself there. In their dark forest, among his spidey brethren. He just wants a moment to himself.

Stepping through the door, he can feel it immediately. The imagination has changed. It feels smaller. The shift has changed even this. Was nothing sacred? Virgil grinds his teeth as he walks through the woods. Mentally checking on all their favorite haunts, looking for the source of this feeling. Despite his apprehension, everything seemed relatively normal, if not slightly abandoned. The lake was still murky, the cave still gave off menacing echoes, and the creek still ran red. Virgil finds himself reaching the end of their territory. The memory of their last meeting with the light sides fighting to the forefront of his mind. Did the light sides know what they were doing to them? Did they know how hard Virgil and his family were fighting? Did they know the pain they were causing? Virgil was itching to take a peek at the meadow. He knew that the light sides were unlikely to be there. But he had to check. Just to see if they were even marginally impacted by the war the dark sides were uselessly waging.

Approaching the last of the trees, he could feel a resistance building up, warning him to not come closer. There was something here. A fuzzy wall, a barrier, separating the forest from the meadow. The dark side from the light side. The subconscious from the conscious. Virgil raises his hand, pressing his palm against the barrier. Pushing his hand through the invisible film that is there. It wraps around his arm as he reaches further forward. The resistance is light. He takes a step and another. Feeling the film pass across his body as he finds himself on the other side.

Virgil can hear Thomas. He always could. But now it is so much stronger. Before Thomas was like a whisper in the back of his mind. He could focus on it as he needed. But now it was like Thomas was standing right beside him, speaking directly into his ear. Thomas was talking to him. Maybe he could talk back. Virgil could use the conscious mind to fight back. He could… Deceit wouldn’t like it. Deceit thought that Thomas would destroy them or repress them if they were conscious. But wasn’t he already repressing them? Wasn’t it time to make themselves known? Thomas needed them. And they needed Thomas. Virgil reaches out. This time with his mind. The way Deceit had taught him to influence Thomas. Except this time he pulls. Pulling on their connection he feels himself sink out of the mindscape. And with a snap he appears to Thomas.

***

It had gone horribly. Virgil reappears in the meadow. He begins pacing back and forth, his frustration boiling over as he runs his hands through his hair. He was so close. Thomas was planning to go to a party tonight. Virgil had finally convinced him to stay home and relax. And then Roman, the insufferable Roman had risen up and ruined everything. It just wasn’t fair. Virgil had entered the conscious mind. He had used their own tactics. He was suppose to win. And yet, Thomas still refused to listen to him. Thomas wasn’t ready to go to a party tonight. Why didn’t they get that?

“Aaaaahhhhh!” Virgil screams into the air. He was so sick of this. Stomping towards the woods he ran through possibilities in his mind. He would talk to Deceit and Remus. Together they could come up with a new solution. Enough playing nice. They were going to be heard even if it killed him.

BANG.

Virgil falls to the ground. Clutching his nose as swears pour out of his mouth. What was that? The barrier was the only thing here. But it wasn’t solid. What had happened? Virgil tentatively reaches out, feeling for the barrier. It is still there. Exactly where he thought it would be. But it is solid. Impassable. Virgil tries as hard as he can to push his hand through. He screams and shouts. Banging against the wall. Crying out for Deceit or Remus or Anyone. Slamming his fists against the wall, calling for help. He was stuck. Anxiety was stuck on the light side.

***

Hours later, Virgil sits there, leaning his forehead against the barrier. Watching the forest through the waxy wall. The spiders of the woods were scurrying around on the other side. They appeared to be panicking. Running around the edge, looking for a way to reach him. Virgil wonders what Arabella was doing. Would she be okay without him? Did Deceit and Remus know he was missing? Would they be able to find him? Could Deceit get him out?

The spiders around the barrier turn away, scuttling back into the forest. Virgil follows them with his eyes. Watching his brethren scurrying away into the shadows. He can feel his shoulders sag. It feels hopeless. He sees them acting frantically. They are rushing to meet a new group of spiders. Spiders that are leading two figures through the forest. Deceit and Remus are there. Looking down at the ground, following his spiders. They had led his family to Virgil. He could almost cry. The spiders were trying to save him. He stands up again, banging on the barrier.

“Deceit! Remus! I’m here!”

Remus is the first to look up and spot him. A grin breaks out on his brother’s face. He shouts out. His mouth forming Virgil’s name. But Virgil can not hear it. He doesn’t care. He shouts back.

“Remus! Help me. I’m stuck!”

Deceit sees him next. He does not smile. Instead it is like his face is drained of all warmth. His arm reaching out to hold Remus back. Remus who is trying to run up to his brother, looks at Deceit in confusion. They begin talking. They begin arguing. Virgil can not hear a thing. He only can wave through the barrier.

“Guys, what’s happening? I can’t hear you. Please, I’m stuck.”

Deceit begins pulling Remus back. Leading him away from the barrier and away from Virgil. The spiders are scurrying around their feet frantic. Virgil screams at them.

“Guys, where are you going?”

Bang. bang.

“Dad!”

bang.

“Please, don’t leave me here!”

Bang. bang. bang.

“Remus…”

knock.

“Dad.”

sniff.

They leave him. Virgil finds himself sliding down onto the ground, screaming at no one and crying for his family. The family that saw him. The family that left him. They were right there. And they had left. Virgil cries and he cries. The spiders brush their legs against the barrier, trying to comfort him. But they can not reach him. He is alone. All alone.

***

Virgil awakes that night. He is lying on the grass, his back pressed against the barrier. His throat is raw and he can feel the dried tears on his face. It’s not a comfortable position. Slowly stretching, he stands, looking back at the forest, at his home. And then he looks across the meadow. There should be a door somewhere over there. A door to Roman’s room and to the light sides’ common. Did they know that he was here? Would they let him enter? He doesn't want to stay out here anymore. He wants to go home. But he can't. Could he go to the light sides? Maybe Patton could help him. Maybe.

Roman’s door is white, bright white. It feels so foreign to Virgil. The room beyond is empty and Virgil can’t help but be thankful. He does not want to run into Roman right now. He can see himself in Roman’s full length mirror. His eyeshadow is completely smeared beneath his eyes. He lightly brushes his fingers across the smeared makeup. I guess this is who I am now. He thinks to himself.

Peeking into the hallway, he can hear whispers coming from the living room. The layout appears to be an exact match to his home. Everything is just brighter and cleaner. Creeping closer to the stairwell, he sees Roman ranting to the others. The creative side is speaking about him. Virgil shrinks back. They would hate him. He was in their home. Invading their space. He should just leave. He can go and live in the imagination. At least then he wouldn’t be in their home.

“Anxiety?” Virgil is jolted out of his thoughts to see Logan staring up at him.

“Virgil! What are you doing here?” Patton chirps up.

His hands are shaking. Hastily, he shoves them into his pockets. Rolling his shoulders back and placing on his signature smirk, he looks down at the light sides. He wouldn’t show them any weakness. “Hey, dorks. I’m a part of Thomas’s conscious mind now. Guess that means I live here.”

“You what?!” Roman exclaims.

“I’m your new roomie.” He purrs. “Don’t mind me, keep talking or whatever you nerds are doing. I’m just gonna go and manifest my new room.” He salutes the flabbergasted sides. Ignoring their dropped-jaws, he struts back the way he came. Wishing that he could tell Remus all about the shocked expressions of the light sides. He would have found it hilarious. But Remus had left him. Deceit had left him. Virgil walks down the hallway, mentally lengthening the hall enough to summon a new door, opening to a new room. Empty for now. But soon he would make it his own. If he was stuck here he would make the most of it. Light sides be damned. Dark sides be damned. He was going to make Thomas listen. It was his job after all.

awesome people to tag: @stop-it-anxiety @rainboots-are-for-snobs @hexatrash @ollyollyoxinfree

#spiders tw #blood mention #blood tw #sanders sides #dark sides #janus sanders #virgil sanders #remus sanders #roman sanders #logan sanders #patton sanders #virgil centric #ts fanfic #my writing #ts fanfiction #sanders sides fanfic #sanders sides fanfiction #virgil fanfic

156 notes · View notes

absoluteyoongit · 5 years ago

Text

just dance [2]

⇢ pairing: bestfriend!Hoseok x dancer!Reader, more pairings to come

⇢ genre: fluff, some angst

⇢ word count: 3.3K

⇢ warnings: just some swearing

⇢ series summary: Jung Hoseok, your best friend since childhood, is one of the best parts of your life. You have always supported him with everything, including his band BTS. Hoseok always kept you a secret from the rest of the group, but now he’s ready to introduce you to everyone. Who knew your presence would improve the members lives, one more than others.

⇢ author’s note: sorry for the delay. I am working on a schedule for this so I can post regularly! banner made by the talented @purpleskies1999

_________________________________________________________________

Heavy breathing filled the otherwise silent studio, marking the end of BTS’ dance practice for the day. The boys had spent the past three hours straight working and all of them wanted a break.

Hoseok, regaining composure first, patted all the members on the back. After a ‘good job’ here and ‘better than yesterday’ there from their dance leader, signaled to the members that they could leave.

Yoongi, first to head out feet dragging, grumbled, “I want a nap.”

“I’ll start making some dinner," Jin muttered, following after.

“Dibs on shower!" Jungkook shouted.

“No way! I called dibs before practice started," Taehyung challenged.

“That doesn’t count.”

“Yes, it does!”

The two continued arguing as Hoseok watched the rest of the members file out. Jimin glanced back, “You coming?”

“Naw” Hobi sighed, “I want to try some things out before finishing for the day.”

Jimin nodded, closing the door behind him and the room was quiet once again.

Hoseok’s eyes left the door, moving towards his phone to play the song over again. He was a perfectionist, wanting to show up for the rest of the members and to do that he needed to practice more. He hesitated before pressing play, his mind wandered; the bags under his eyes felt extra heavy right then.

Hoseok couldn't deny it anymore, he was exhausted.

He was tired of the constant busy schedule. He loved his job but sometimes the group became so busy that the nights bled into days without so much of a wink of sleep. This went on for months at a time for them; it was too much.

Hoseok felt like he couldn't slip up once. He was considered the team's constant ray of sunshine by their fans, the media and even most of the members themselves. That was the world’s J-Hope. He was always there for his brothers when they needed a pick-me-up even if they never realized sometimes he needed one too.

The break the company was giving them this upcoming weekend could be hardly called an actual break. They were taking him and the boys to a natural spring for a ‘spa day’, which sounds nice on paper but Hoseok knew it was probably to film another Run episode. While filming those with the boys was usually fun the whole group craved an actual break.

Hoseok gaze dropped back to his phone, resigning to be the dance leader he needed to be for now. Before he could resume the music they needed to hone their routine for his phone rang. Your face popped up on the screen. The photo was blurry because he was in the middle of running away from you as he took it. You had caught him taking photos and flipped him off before chasing him. You always shied away from the camera and while the other pictures from that day were amusing, nothing says y/n more than a blurry image of you giving him the bird.

Hoseok’s eyes brightened at the sight, answering it immediately.

“y/n?! I haven't heard from you in a while. What is up my friend!”

He heard your chuckle from the other end, “Ah– you know the usual, just got done working for the day on a new routine I’m figuring out.”

“I’m doing the exact same thing. We are in sync still after all this time. I am touched,” Hoseok dramatically cried, wiping a fake tear away. Your unamused silence had him jumping back to his excited demeanor, “Anyways, will you tell me what the song is? Or do I have to find out when you finally post it like everyone else?”

“HAH! You’re not special. You’re gonna have to wait with everyone else- especially cause I want this one to be a surprise.”

Hoseok huffed. He knew he would not get anything out of you. Being stubborn was probably one of your biggest character traits but that was okay– he loved riling up your stubborn side as he pestered you. Almost as much as you liked cracking his sunshine nature. That was your dynamic. You two behaved like an old bickering married couple. If anyone observed him act the way he does around you they would have thought he was another person entirely.

Y/n brought out a whole other side to him, one that he thought was more real but the rest of the world didn't want to see. That's why you were so special to him. Besides all the good times the two of you had, you made him feel the most himself.

Your laughter died down, "Anyways I was just calling to check in on you and uh– to say that I missed you– just a little bit."

Hobi's smile turned solemn. He missed his best friend so much. The life he lived gave him few moments of reprieve, so much so he never had the time to hang or even talk with anyone besides the boys and sometimes his family, so he appreciated the little moments like this the most.

"Aish, y/n. Why do you have to turn things sad– you know I miss you so much too. I need more than just these boys hanging around me sometimes."

"I'm sure living with them, working with them and being friends with them leaves you wanting to escape sometimes– even if just a little. I know you love your boys though."

Hobi sighed, you weren't wrong. He loved the boys a lot but he wanted–no needed–some alone time. He couldn't even escape to his room if he desired because he still shared with Jimin.

You were much different than the boys. He missed dancing with you. He missed your loud laughter, he missed your constant teasing, he missed you. Maybe seeing you would shake this exhaustion away.

An idea popped into his head. He and the boys had their “weekend trip” planned but Hoseok was sure he could muster up a convincing excuse to escape it. Pure excitement and hope shot up his veins.

"What are you doing this weekend?" Hobi rushed out, effectively cutting off the rant you started about the crazy coffee lady from earlier that day.

"Oh– umm...let me think."

Hobi bit back a smile. He could imagine your thinking face as clear as day: nose scrunching up and eyes turning into slits as you looked up into the sky.

"I have a shift at work Friday night and then I teach a class at the studio Saturday mornings. I don't care about doing my homework for class, so I am free other than that. Why do you ask?" anticipation clear in your voice.

"Well because I am coming to visit you. I haven't seen you in months. So, I think I deserve some time with my favorite human."

It was your turn to smile, Hoseok hit a soft spot with that comment. You knew your friend had the biggest smirk on his face as he said that, knowing full well your soft but you don't like to show it. Comments like that make your heart constrict.

"You actually have time off? Bighit finally letting you off the leash?"

"Well not exactly. We do have the weekend off but all the boys are supposed to go on a trip together but I am going to weasel my way out for you."

You comically sob, "Oh! You'd do that for me? I can't believe the Jung Hoseok of BTS is going to escape his confinement for me. Get you a real hoe that ditches his bros for you. Hoes before bros this time."

Hoseok barked out a laugh, "Yes, the Jung Hoseok is going to abandon his bros for his favorite hoe."

"Your favorite hoe? I am your only hoe. THEE HOE. Hoseok's hoe," you challenged.

"Shit, okay, you're right you are my one and only hoe. Even though Taehyung likes to think he is sometimes."

Laughter breaks out between the two of you at your combined silliness. It felt really really good to talk to him like this. It was a rarity.

"Anyhow, when are you going to be gracing me with your presence. I know I got a pretty free schedule but I can't just stare at my door all day till you show up," you chuckled.

"When does your dance class end on Saturday? I can swing by after and we could maybe dance a little if you're not tired."

You scoff, holding two fingers up even though he couldn’t see, "There are two things I will never tire from: dancing and amusement parks."

A loud groan resonated from over the phone, "I still cannot believe I'm friends with someone who loves roller coasters. You will be the death of me."

"Hey! I ask for one thing and one thing only for my birthday, and that's for you to ride the biggest coaster at the park with me. That is not too much of an ask."

"Yah! it is for me."

"Whatever scaredy-cat. The point is that I will always have the energy to dance," you pause hearing his hum in agreement, "especially if it's with you," you end with a whisper.

Now Hoseok was even more upset than before. He needed to see you, whatever it took.

"I promise I'll get out of this trip with the boys and we can hang out this whole weekend, just the two of us."

The two of you stood in silence, only the sound of each other's breaths danced across your ears. It was weird. You knew you missed him, a lot, but talking to him now and hearing his voice felt different. There was a stronger ache in your heart, more so than you have ever felt before. You loved your best friend so much and it finally clicked in your head how much your life sucked without him in it daily.

"You better keep that promise, Jung."

"Have I ever broken a promise before?"

–––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––

"Excuse me, miss? Can I order?"

Your eyes that had been staring off into space snapped to the elderly man before you.

"Oh, my apologies sir! What can I get for you?"

You smiled taking his order but as soon as he paid and left your sight the smile faded. Glancing at the watch on your wrist, the slow ticking of the hands mocking you as you stared. You had another two hours of your shift left. You huffed, shifting your legs back and forth as you anxiously waited for another customer to distract you.

You were nervous. Which was totally unlike you but for some reason, you couldn't help it. This was going to be the first time you were seeing Hoseok in months but It felt longer than that. So much longer. At least that's what you tried to convince yourself as the reason why you were nervous to see your childhood best friend.

Maebum, your favorite coworker, could see something was very wrong from just the way you fiddled with your hands. The two hands looked dry and cracked as you continuously rubbed them in front of you.

"Hey sweetie, what's up with you today? I have never seen you this wound up." her gaze on you held so much worry. You try to smile to placate her but it didn't reach your eyes.

"I am fine Mae. I just had a long week." you lie.

She gave you a pointed look that screamed 'I don't believe a word you are saying'.

You sigh in defeat. Mae's superpower was reading people and detecting bullshit, it’s what made her a great manager. That power combined with her extreme compassion meant that she was not going to let this go.

"I just had a talk with my friend that I haven't seen in a while. He told me he was going to visit this weekend and I guess I'm kinda nervous– or something like that. I don't know."

You fiddled with your fingers more, glancing around the cafe in hope a customer would come in and save you from this conversation. You were already a nervous mess, you didn't need Mae trying to pry more information and feelings out of you.

"Are you nervous because you don't think things will be the same? Or is it something else?"

Mae's eyes searched yours looking for an unspoken answer.

"I guess it’s partly that? Maybe? I don't know. I think that's partly why I am anxious because I don't know why I am nervous at all.”

You groan in frustration "I just really miss him and hope things go okay because maybe that will mean I will see him more," you turn back to Mae with a dejected expression, "at least that is the wish anyway."

Mae softly grinned down at you, "I'm sure it'll all go well, sweetheart. If he really was your best friend seeing him will feel like the distance never existed in the first place."

At that assurance, your heart swelled. She was right. This wasn't the first time you saw Hoseok after a long break. Things were never awkward or weird, so why should this be any different.

"You know what, that actually helped a lot. Thank you Mae." a large grin plastered on your face.

She reached up and ruffled your hair, "Anytime sweetie."

Turning back to register you excitedly greet the next customer who walks in, ready to take their order. The rest of your shift passed quick after Mae’s intervention. Her words really did help but a small part of you could not ignore the subtle soreness of your heart. It felt as if careful hands cradled it, applying pressure that made it impossible to take a deep breath. You hoped those hands would not crush it.

–––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––

Hoseok was nervous. That much was certain as his legs bounced from his seat on the shared living room couch.

Yoongi had been silently watching Hoseok from the other side of the room for some time now. It was very strange to see his friend this worked up and it alarmed him a little. Not enough to make a scene but enough to make a mental note to talk to Namjoon about it later.

Taking a sip from his iced coffee, Yoongi wondered what Hoseok could be worried about. Was it the new routine the group was learning? He noticed how the dancer had stayed late at the dance studio after regular practice was over. Yoongi's lip jutted out. No, it couldn't be that. The routine was difficult but nothing the rest of the boys couldn't handle learning on their own. Was it the trip that they were planning to go on tomorrow? Yoongi knew it was still technically work, as much as he hated that, but it was still supposed to be a lowkey weekend. One that all the boys desperately needed.

Yoongi and Hoseok were now both lost in their own thoughts when the two maknaes entered the room.

Jungkook and Taehyung stopped in their tracks as they eyed their two silent hyungs from the doorway. Comically looking back and forth between the two brothers with wide eyes.

"Hey, Tae-hyungie? What do you think they're doing" Jungkook whispered, leaning towards his older brother.

Taehyung continued looking between the hyungs in the living room. One was staring off into space and the other’s whole body was vibrating from how fast his legs were bouncing.

"I have no idea, Kook. We just came for the snacks, remember. Stick to the mission." Taehyung reminded him, patting Jungkook’s chest and starting forward.

Jungkook held him back, "Hyung– look at them. They look like they could use some brotherly love." The maknae gave Tae a pointed look and gestured for him to save Yoongi from whatever spell he seemed to be under.

Tae huffed, upset he wasn't getting his snacks anytime soon, but willingly trudged over to his older friend. Taking another look at him Taehyung noticed Yoongi chewing on the straw in his iced coffee, something he never does, and his eyes scrunched in deep thought.

Pulling the now empty coffee cup out of his hyung's hands he finally got Yoongi's attention.

"Taehyung? When did you get here?" Yoongi blinked in confusion. He definitely did not register the maknaes entering the room. He was still too focused on Hobi and why he could be so stressed out right now.

"Me and Kook wanted some snacks before we watched the next episode of our drama but when we got here both of you looked so out of it. Is everything okay?" Taehyung's eyebrows creased in concern.

Yoongi’s shoulders slumped. He didn't know if everything was okay. All he knew was that Hobi was anxious for some reason and that worried him.

"Hobi has been sitting there for the past hour either looking straight ahead or looking at his phone. I haven't seen him this stressed in a while."

Taehyung scowled, he hated seeing the dancer with a frown on his face, it was unnatural.

Their gazes landed on the backs of the maknae and their distressed dancer across the room. Hopefully, Jungkook could bring out a little spring in Hoseok's step today.

"Are you sure you don't want to talk about it, Hyung? Whatever’s going on seems to be upsetting you."

"Aish Jungkook, you just won't let up will you? If you really want to know, fine. I don't want to go on the trip tomorrow. I really don't want to and I have been sitting here for who knows how long trying to think of an excuse to tell you all and especially the company."

Hoseok dropped his head with a sigh, rubbing his neck, "I didn't want to make you guys upset or anything I just wanted an actual break, ya know. I want to talk to our managers to see what we can do about it. I hope it's not too late because I don't plan on going anywhere tomorrow even if they have to drag me."

One thing that he didn't admit to the boys was the plan to stay with his best friend this weekend instead of them. How was he going to make an excuse to not spend time with them this weekend? Even if he could convince the company to let them have a break. He wanted to keep you a secret. The special way you made him feel was for himself only. He didn't care that he was being selfish. He knew the moment he introduced you to the group it would no longer be just Hoseok and Y/n. He already shared so much with the boys, why couldn't he be selfish just this once?

The room fell back into silence. The rest of the boys were shocked by Hoseok's admission. They knew he was the happy type that always went with the flow. They never thought he never got stressed but they have never seen him this dejected and drained.

"I am sure we can talk to the company about this Hyung."

Hoseok turned and looked over his shoulder at Taehyung, eyes tired. "I don't know. It's really last minute and we are supposed to leave tomorrow. I don't think the company would let us opt out of it. I was planning on pretending I was sick or something."

Yoongi's eyebrows scrunched more. It was that serious that Hoseok was prepared to fake an illness to get out of the trip.

"We can talk to the others. I am sure they would prefer an actual weekend off compared to what our manager is promising."

"Yeah! With all of us protesting we may actually convince them you know."

The tired dancer looked at each of his brothers in the eye and let out a breath. "Alright. Let's go talk with the others."

The other three all stole a glance at each other as Hoseok got up from the couch and strode out of the room to his bedroom. None of them said anything but each knew they had to call off this trip somehow, some way. They needed to give their most hardworking friend the break he deserved.

"Who's going to call our manager?"

"Not me!"

"Aish you two, just get Namjoon to do it."

[previous]~[next]

52 notes · View notes