#im writing it anyways just for me but im wondering if it would actually interest anyone else

[anticanonhearts]

hi jearmin nation.

i'm writing a post-finale, modern au fic where aruannie & jeankasa have married, and years down the line, armin decides to seduce jean into an affair.

annie is 1 degree away from going Gone Girl and mikasa is the only one with any sanity.

would any1 read?

thx

[crystalkitty1220]

Might have to scrap a fic idea because I thought the panic that came with time moving too slowly or too quickly was a universal thing, but now I'm realizing I probably have chronophobia and the fic might not feel the same to other people. Don't want it to drag on or feel rushed if readers won't get the same kind of anxiety the character's getting.

[thecoolerliauditore]

on one hand, very glad my suspicions of burnout and gimmicks as a result of fear of losing viewership were wrong at least as far as we know. im glad the CCs are having fun and their enjoyment is being prioritized, even if i am still not entirely convinced everyone's on the same page.

on the other hand, it's melancholic but this is pretty much the nail in the coffin in me having any interest left in future installments of the series. for those of you concerned: I am forever haunted by my brain diseases and will be continuing to post, write and draw 3L - SL for the rest of my forseeable life (plus completely disconnecting from any need I feel to interact with WL and beyond leaves me with more time to work on. certain larger scale projects I have had plans for)

i respect grians decision-making and he would know better than me how to run a youtube series, however I do question how much of an oxymoron it is to not care about viewer feedback for a youtube series run on viewership (and when so many of the recent behind the scenes decisions we've been privy to - such as Scar and Grian's hesitancy to team up based on comments calling them "boring" -- imply the opposite regarding the cast's mindset). it makes me concerned for the longevity of the series going forward, since those not happy with the direction that I've seen have all been very passionate and old fans, but I've also seen an equal if not louder support for this season, so I digress.

Part of me wonders how much of the "we want last life 2" sentiment (<-- something I've previously spoken about how I don't agree with) the cast has been exposed to, since it felt strange to me that it was even bought up. I have had a thought about this and the consequences of "don't maintag your negativity" e.g. the reasonable people know to hide their critical posts, and what that leaves a creator with are the unreasonable people, and if it's only that feedback that gets processed, then inevitably things tend to go in weird directions. Were any of us actually "tired" of Desert Duo interacting? Were any of us mad at Gem for killing Grian in SL?

It's frustrating to see crit posts get flagged down with accusations of disrespecting or attacking the CCs, or "we don't want you here anyway, just leave," when myself and all the people I've spoken to being not avid haters but rabid fans who feel frustrated and actively want to continue liking the series. Not to mention most of the people also being active members of the fandom ontop of that -- we claim that fanart is important and makes the series even more special than it already is, yet people seem more than happy to sacrifice that just for the sake of not seeing critical opinions.

t-shirt that says blah blah blah. but I reserve the right of feeling disappointed.

[the-s1lly-corner]

hello I hope ur request are open! If not be free to ignore this!! Okay so TADC x y/n? (The amazing digital circus also it can be muti characters or one!! The choice is yours!! ^ ^)

OKAY OKAY SO WHAT IF..🥁🥁🥁 y/n was like Jessica rabbit from "who framed roger rabbit" 👀 and was very like motherly to everyone but when she was called doll,/toots,/ect, by jax or anyone SHE WOULD PUNCH THEM HARDDDD (kinda like the lola bunny fanfic??) Also she is like one inch taller then jax (she a tall women👀❤️)

(HAVE FUN WITH THIS IDEA!! DONT RUSH YOURSELF TO DO IT TAKE UR TIME ON IT!! AND DRINKS LOTS OF WATER AND EAT FOOD!! HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY/NIGHT!!🫶🫶)

Digital Circus x a jessica rabbit-type reader!

since im a little melty brain from blasting through a bunch of requests today im going to do part of the cast! mostly characters i think would be interesting with this kind of reader as well as some characters i just wanna write more of (cough cough kinger cough cough)(i was originally going to do gangle as well but uhuh!!) ...this reminds me ive never watched who framed roger rabbit... or rather i have, but its been so long that ive truly forgotten nearly every aspect of the movie relying on the character wiki talking about her personality to guide me through this

CAINE:

caines and jax's parts are both likely going to be on the shorter side thanks to both of their cores holding similar themes in regards to half of the idea

anyways he's going to call you pet names, especially if he's interested in you.. good luck trying to land anything on him, though, he's going to easily zoom through the air

okay nod to the lola bunny request aside, i think caine would be just head (jaw?) over heels for you, i mean, he would be anyways, but something about your caring and quick witted personality

probably makes literal heart eyes at you and audibly goes "awooga"

absolutely loves watching you do your thing during the in house adventures, on the few times he actually spectates them; though you may or may not be the reason he watches

seems like the kind of person to call you "hot stuff" or "babe"

doesn't really care about the height difference since he rarely ever stands on the ground anyways, plus he doesn't care how small he is

JAX:

to get a good idea of how jax would interact with you, i recommend this similar post! hope this links correctly, im still new to linking stuff in my posts!!

a lot of elements from the post above bleed into this, but lets add some more to it to make it a little more unique to the jessica rabbit idea!

takes it upon himself to try to get some sort of reaction out of you, outside of the name stuff... which proves to be a little harder than he thought.. actually, oddly enough, you seem to enjoy his antics?

well thats certainly new to him...

aaaaaand oh! hey would you look at that you've officially caught his attention, congratulations!

does not take too kindly to being the new second tallest, though... sure you're barely taller than him but its the principle! how can he lord his height over everyone else now!

KINGER:

so here's where i may be biased since i love kinger and i wish more people wrote for him, so his part may be a little longer, we'll see! i write these lil notes as i work on the post

right away i dont think he would call you any of the petnames listed above, or anything similar. i think, should you guys get on a nickname basis he would call you sweeter ones, "my love," "my darling", "my sweetheart", and similar stuff!

does not have lightning reflexes like jax and caine but if the names genuinely do bother you he would likely stop, you'll just have to remind him

imma be so real this man needs someone to stand back and just be there for him because he is going through it, so to have someone in his corner who has his best interests at heart will really do a lot for him

no comment on the height difference since kinger is pretty tall himself (and hes taller than jax! the only reason jax isnt upset about that is because kinger is always hunched), but i dont think he gives a darn about height

i am once again thinking about the in house adventure prompt with kinger that i had earlier, where he gets stuck somewhere and you have to go rescue him... this + that prompt, JUMPS UP N DOWN

[hockybish]

hey hope you're doing well

I was wondering if you could write #55 from your prompt list where theirs an age gap where the reader is younger with Joseph Woll

thx love your writing

Hi Sweetie, Im good. I'm so sorry this is so late, I've been working on cross stitching Christmas presents and I've made myself sick from staying up too late.

Anyways. Enjoy! Let me know what you think

Just a Number

l Joseph Woll x Younger!Reader l Masterlist l

You looked pretty good.

Or at least that's what you thought with your makeup and hair done just right. You had your favorite pleather leggings on, and the best part of the whole outfit in your opinion was blue and white jersey with your boyfriend's last name on the nameplate.

You smoothed down the logo of the jersey to get a better look at the whole thing put together. You deemed it perfect and set off for the game.

Due to you busy school schedule and work this was the first Leafs game you were able to attend since the beginning of the season. It also just so happened that Joe was slated to start in goal that game.

It was perfect. Right?

The first time you heard some of the ladies saying things, you were minding your business the family room. You didn't know many people so you mainly kept to yourself.

That was until a couple of the wags found you and decided to introduce themselves.

"Are your here to watch your brother or something?" The one with the blonde hair snickered.

"No. I'm here supporting my boyfriend. He's p-playing tonight. He's the goalie." You smile.

"Joseph Woll is your boyfriend? Ha yeah right, you're a bit young for him don't you think? You're practically a baby." The other lady joined the conversation, continuing on with what felt like insults.

You were taken aback. You had no idea how to respond. Sure Joe was a bit older than you, but you were pretty sure you did the math correctly and it was totally socially acceptable for you to be someone who was six years older than you. Right?

"Also what are you wearing? It's a bit tacky and pick me to be wearing your boyfriend's jersey?" The blonde chimed in again.

You were always confident in your looks but them judging and making comments you made you question yourself and why Joe was even with you.

You were so out of it during the game, you hadn't noticed the Leafs won. That Joseph gave an amazing performace, even earning himself a shutout.

But you hadn't noticed any of that. Sure you had been going through the motions, cheering when the team scored or the goalie had made a big save. You were too consumed with other thoughts to comprehend what was actually going on around you.

"Hey Babe" Joe found after the game standing on to the side, you were looking at something interesting on the ground while hugging yourself.

When there wasn't an answer from you, Joe hooked his finger under your chin to lift it so you would face him. He leaned in to kiss you only to have you turn your head and his lips land on your cheek instead of your lips.

"Y/N, what's up?" He frowned sensing you weren't all there.

"Nothing. Can we just go home? Please?" You couldn't look at him but you couldn't hear the ladies from before laughing at you again.

He nodded. Joseph managed to pry a hand free so he could lead you to the car. A little ways into the drive he started in with the questions again. He was determined to get out of you what was up.

You were tight lipped, but somehow he was able to put a crack in your defense.

"Are you going to tell me what's wrong?"

"Do you ever think maybe I'm too young for you? It's a pretty big gap between twenty and twenty six. And maybe it's too big of an age gap. I'm just a baby after all. An inexperienced baby."

"Where is this coming from?" Joseph

"I- I don't know. I was just thinking."

"Well I don't care about age, it's just a number. I think you're perfect just the way you are. We're learning together." He tried his best reassuring you, by saying all the typical things people say when posed with the big age question. It wasn't makig you feel better.

"Plus if your really worried about it. Do the age equation. You know take your age divide by two add seven or your age minus seven times two." He urged you to find the range.

"20 and 26"

"Exactly! We're just the right age for each other." He reached over to take your hand.

"You mean we're skirting on the edge. If you were born one year earlier and I one year later, it wouldn't big of a gap."

Joe sighed heavily. There was no winning with you. "But we weren't. We're just right. I promise. Please" He could feel he was losing you. He didn't want that at all. He loved you.

"Can you just take me home?"

"That's a perfect idea, we can -"

"No Joe. I want to be myself right now" You turned away from the man you loved, letting go of his hand in the process.

--

A couple of weeks had passed since you had asked Joseph to drop you off at your apartment and then proceeded to ghost him. In that time you had gotten a couple dozen phone call, voicemails, and text messages from the overly concerned man.

In that time Joe had gotten the message that the two of you were over. He didn't understand why. He wanted a chance to talk to you and would do anything to get that chance. Even asking for the things that he left at your place that he really didn't care about.

Joe was the only one to speak when you handed over the Maple Leafs hoodie that he absolutely needed back. "Can I ask what happened?"

"Joe" You pleaded.

"Y/N, please, I think you owe me that much. Because everything had been going great and then something happened that night of that game. Was it me? Did I do something?"

"No. You could never do anything wrong. It wasn't you, it is me" You sigh quickly deciding to tell him everything that had happened that night. Everything that had been said to you and everything you had overheard.

"None of that is true. I don't think you're too young, or a baby. You, Y/N Y/L/N are perfect. I don't care what you wear to games, dress up, jersey, I don't care."

If he remembered correctly that night he thought you looked hot as hell wearing his jersey, and he was kinda hoping to fuck you while you were wearing it.

"I would like another chance. Please let me show you are perfect the way you are. That age is just a number." Joe let you know.

"I know this is a bad idea, but I want it so much" You bite your lip. Joe was here and looking rather scrumptious as always. This was bad.

"Do whatever you want, Y/N, the ball is in your court."

You take a quick look on either side of the to make sure none of your nosey neighbors happen to be in the hallway. They didn't need to see what you were about do. Thank god the coast was clear.

What happened next was a bit of a blur. You don't really think. You grab onto Joe's shirt, pulling him into your apartment. Once he clears the door, you crash your lips against his.

Joe fumbles with the hem of your shirt waiting for your word to go any further, the Lego roses he had made for you now decorated the floor in pieces.

Maybe this was a bad idea. Sure Joseph was a bit older than you, but age is really just a silly number. You're both adults and you really did love him.

[vanitaslvr]

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─── ⁞ I already knew ❤︎

Kenma x gn! Reader

↳ ꒰ content ꒱ fluff, jealousy, friends to lovers, reader is Nekoma’s manager, jealous kenma

꒰ note ꒱ i sadly cant find the anon who requested it anymore BUT i had much fun writing it! I really hope this goes after what you expected ^^

꒰ tw ꒱ english isn’t my first language!, Bad grammar!

─── ─── ─── ───

Kenma was nervous .. right now he was standing in front of your shoe locker with an envelope in his hands

“Yo kenma come on just do it, the worst they can do is say no” Kuroo says after taking the letter and putting it into your locker and then dragging kenma to class not giving him any time to take it out again.

flashback to last year when kenma was a first year, after you joined the volleyball club as a manager (you were also a first year), kenma catched on quickly on some of your hobbies. after he found out you also liked playing video games like him he became very Interested in you and after a few months he finally realized he had feelings for you he of course told kuroo first. kuroo obviously told him to confess... which he did second year.

Anyways a little later after class kenma, kuroo, yaku and lev leave for the cafeteria, little did kenma know… he would meet you while walking and he indeed did He sees you talking with a boy, kenma knows him! He was the captain of the basketball club. Kenma felt his jealousy build up so he quickly walked away “whats up with him?” Yaku asks, kuroo looks around and quickly catches on what was happening “well his crush is talking to the basketball club captai-“ he stops talking after hearing the words that came out of the basketball captains mouth “so you wanna go out with me?” “Haha no im sorry im already interested in someone” you say “ oh come on y/n don’t be like that i know you want me” he said flexing with his arm muscles. You look at him with bored eyes as you walk past him. “Well i really hope y/n is interested in kenma or else were gonna have a problem” yaku says “why? Is it bad that y/n likes someone else?” After hearing these words from lev yaku kicked him yelling “obviously its bad because then kenma would be sad! We can’t have our poor kenma sad!” “Well for now that doesnt matter im hungry lets go ready” kuroo says making his way up to the cafeteria

After school you arrive at the gym seeing the boys already fully concentrated on their training As you went inside you can already hear Yamamoto yell “ Y/N OUR BELOVED MANAGER I MISSED YOU SO MUCH” as he starts sprinting at you but quickly gets snatched on his shirt by kuroo “well well yamamoto don’t scare our y/n like that” You feel eyes staring at you and you know exactly who they blong to

A few seconds after coach Nekomata came in and the training officially starts. as training went on you quickly came to realize that kenma was avoiding you, you knew exactly why and yet you were to shy to go up to him and ask him why he was avoiding you .

After the training it was already dark outside “yo y/n walk with us” kuroo yells “YEAH COME ON WE CAN’T HAVE YOU WALK ALONE AT NIGHT” yamamoto yells. 10 minutes after walking with the small group kuroo decides to poke into kenmas side then pointing right to you, kenma just shakes his head but kuroo had other plans

“Yo y/n kenma wants to talk to you he has something important to say” he said before walking away with yaku dragging yamamoto with them. you turn to look at kenma who was looking very nervous “y/n i-“ “you like me, i know.. i already knew you liked me for a bit now i always felt someone staring at me and i knew it was you” you smile at him “i never knew you’d catch on that quickly to be honest” “well kenma now that you kind of confessed may i confess something too?” You ask, he looked at you nodding his head “i like you too.. i actually have been for a very long time” you stated. Kenma looked at you in shock poor boy doesn’t know how to react to that well yeah he is happy that you like him back but he wouldn’t know what to do next..that is until you kiss him. As you pulled away you both were a blushing mess.. ''sooo.. you wanna play some overwatch at my place?'' you just nod as you both walk to the bus stop hand in hand

''THEY GROW UP SO FAST'' yamamoto cries yaku just looks at yamamoto with a small smile agreeing before looking over to kuroo just just stares at you and kenma ''im really happy kenma finally found another person he can spend some equally time with'' he said while yaku nodding in agreement -------------------------------- authors note : FINALLY DONE.... SO i never actually wrote for a jealous! person before so it was kind hard for me to do and took me some time -i know this is definetly not the best and i would really appreciate some tipps and advice for writing (especially since this is my FIRST fanfic i actually publish)

anyways stay healthy yall! drink and eat enough!

[pressplay-if]

I was wondering if more things would be customizable in the future, for example body type. Btw I love your game. I rarely like every character, but in Press Play everyone captured my interest. Especially Angel, im a sucker for that type of characters haha ❤️

<<<3

Thank you so much nonnie! I love to see an Angel fan. Lots of stuff about body things in answer to your ask below this cut:

As for your question, this is sth I've been putting off. In the beginning, I didn't add it bc I figured "oh, it won't come up anyways" but now that I'm realizing that perception body types and especially disordered eating is a big theme in Zima's storyline, I fear that it actually would... in a negative way.

Like, I'm thinking of the toxicity an MC with a bigger body type would be on the receiving end of. I don't know if I'm in the right mind to write that, BUT at the same time, I don't want to ignore that it's a real life issue?? Thinking of Adele and how a lot of the time, hateful audiences made it about her weight and not her music. Think she even said sth about that in an interview herself a couple times.

Now, of course there's people who'll give artists hate for anything, thin folks aren't exempt from that either, so don't think I forgot about that! Like how people will bash really skinny folks for promoting unhealthy images when they can't really help how they look and don't intend to set an example for anyone. So that could happen to MC too. (It already will happen to Stevie at some point, and I think I'm just more okay with writing it being targeted at an NPC than first person.)

Both ends are just really really sad to me, and I realize MC getting harassed by haters will happen either way in the story, I'm just still figuring out to which extent I'm ok with that. Leaving body types for the MC ambiguous is a big cop-out, I know, but I just haven't decided how to ultimately deal with that yet.

So to summarize this rambling stream of consciousness; I'm really indecisive.

[lowkeyren]

hello !! i really love your aventurine fics <3 i was wondering how you go about characterising him?

ahh thank you!! (,,>﹏<,,) i'll js use this chance to give a brief overview of my understanding of aventurine!! so feel free to scroll below for my take on aven characterization on my fics. for now, tw: yapping (lol)

at face value, aventurine is js a cocky bastard (/aff) with a rlly fucked up backstory; in which i believe that he fakes his confidence to mask his insecurities + his inability to let go of his past (evident from quest desc, reddit user compiled it here). 

his self loathing words are also kind of an inferiority complex (??) though he hides it really well. plus he often puts himself down because he genuinely doesn't believe that he's worthy (was literally sold for 60 tanbas, definitely fucked with his mental, thinking his life is only worth that much) + his tendency to overcompensate in money cus he isn't able to believe that people would genuinely want his company if not for his fortune or riches.

CN: 

没了那块「砂金石」，你就只是个被公司判了死刑的茨冈尼亚奴隶——还是说，你脖子上那行「商品编码」也是琥珀王的恩赐？

translation: without that piece of "aventurine", you're nothing more than a sigonian slave sentenced to die by the IPC —or is the line of "commodity code" on your neck also a gift from the amber lord?

he was favoured by gaiathra, but does he really see his luck as a blessing, or a curse? i’m sure we’re aware of his tendency to hide his hand behind his back because he’s terrified of losing despite being known to “have nothing to lose” when gambling; well his mantra on "all or nothing" also breaks me deeply cus it’s the same thing the man who bought him said (fits his character too i guess). 

i genuinely started tweaking when he (indirectly) said he attempted on his own life 3 times in penacony + when we had to take a photo of kakavasha, and there were 3 other empty spots for his parents and sister. 

tldr: aventurine fans are allergic to happiness because aventurine himself is allergic to happiness.

OKAY IM (not) DONE, SORRY LET ME ACTUALLY ANSWER THE QUESTION LMAOO

for my aventurine fics, i have yet to write one that actually deep-dives into his character, not one that mainly focuses on his character at least!! 

but i digress, dwst was written with “aventurine often wears a smile that masks his true motives, but when he's drunk that facade crumbles.” in mind. (though it didn’t come out exactly that way? up to your interpretation honestly!) 

from heartfelt embrace: “but nonetheless, maybe one day aventurine will open his heart to you, and you’ll find the courage to speak your truth. until then, you’ll find comfort in the warmth of his embrace.”

^ aventurine's guarded nature is evident in his emotional reticence. as he’s not ready to reveal his vulnerable side just yet, he yearns to provide warmth and security to you even if he struggles to express his feelings verbally.

incandescent feelings overflow was also kinda like “haha he has a nonchalant facade, but in reality he does have smt to hide” (can be interpreted as his romantic interest in you or he simply finds teasing you amusing) 

anyway live laugh love aventurine!!!!

good question google

[eddiegettingshot]

Tbh I was radicalized this summer when you said we have progressed past the need for eddie therapy spec and fics. i havent read a single one since and probably wont again and my life has been so peaceful since… he literally does not need that. He just needs to feel secure and open with his feelings, needs to let people love him fully, and maybe some grief counselling/a support group to go to occasionally. If frank was going to help with that he would have in s3. (no offence to people who write/read therapy fics Im sure they are wonderful and profound and frank is actually good at his job in them)

helpppp good. thank you for giving me an excuse to talk about my beloathed therapy eddie because i think it’s so so so funny that after 8x06 the predictable response was that eddie needs to go to therapy. which i feel like there are soooo many things happening on both the character and the story level. like what’s funny is that frank really could not be a good therapist on screen because that’s not interesting tv. i’m not a therapist but i imagine that in fear-o-phobia he should have probably like. worked with eddie to decide on who he’d try to contact, figure out how the conversation might go, work on coping strategies, etc. but obviously eddie had to blow up. it’s funny because all of the other presumably “good” work frank does is completely off screen. because it’s uninteresting. so eddie wouldn’t have the kind of therapy arc people think he should have anyway, it’s quite literally just something people demand because they need a virtue signal that eddie is “trying” (and of course therapy is the only picture of “trying to heal”). the fact that he’s growing and dealing with stuff outside of therapy is like, not acceptable i guess? i think it’s also funny that as far as fic goes eddie is pretty much always in therapy but it is truly once in a blue moon that we see buck or really any other character talk about therapy.

anyway on the character level. obviously people who relate to eddie’s experience might find therapy really useful but i am not talking about real people i’m talking about a character who is fake. something that is very funny and interesting to me is that in the fear-o-phobia scene eddie is pretty much being resistant and mean and a bitch the whole time but when frank says “you can’t put all your feelings in a box eddie because someday it’ll blow up” and eddie literally already knows what’s going on (“…and take me with it”). actually eddie pretty much always knows what’s going on when he’s having issues it’s just he packs it all down. so seeing a character like this do the internal pathologized work of therapy with just. A Therapist. is… soooo boring to me. it’s funny because i do think frank was right. like in the end i think it’s sort of indicated that eddie is not only feeling this survivor’s guilt/pointlessness but that he also fears he’s going to end up like all the other people who share his pain. so he does need that sort of external pathway to dealing with his issues, like… exactly what you said… leaning on the people in his life… loving them and letting them love him… perhaps a support group or volunteering or whatever… in terms of an actual story these things are soooo much cooler and more fun than what therapy stuff can offer eddie specifically (like… strategies? identifying various cognitive distortions? idk). because he’s already a character who’s always in his head… it’s so much better. To Me. to see him work through things in other ways. such as by talking to a gay priest.

[mrsshabana]

honestly i need a story time about the cult? also the link to that podcast, im intrigued now lol

𝐌𝐲 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐜𝐮𝐥𝐭

Ok children gather around. It's story time 🤓

Note: Now I won't provide a link because I talk about a lot of personal stuff including my name and location, and I don't want so many people having access to that. But I don't mind telling my story here.

Content warning: Mentions of religious trauma and eating disorders

Ok, so let me set the scene. I was 18 and moved out of my parents' house. I lived in a ghetto apartment near my university where I was studying art.

Now when I moved out my parents stopped talking to me. So I really felt alone, I had no family, no friends, and I was in a new place so I was very desperate to have a connection with someone. So really I was the perfect victim for a cult because I was vulnerable.

One day I was walking out of the mathematics building when a student stopped me and asked me if I would like to read the bible with her. She was a Korean international student and she was really nice so I was like sure why not. Now at this point, I wasn't super religious but I did consider myself a Christian. But I never knew the bible very well and my family was the kind of family that only went to church on easter and Christmas.

So anyway, I read the bible with her and she explained it to me. The way she explained the passage was insinuating that there was a female version of god. That was something I had never heard of before but it was interesting to me so I decided to come with her to her bible study.

Long story short it ended up being this organization called "The World Mission Society Church of God." I went to their church and spent hours with them every Wednesday and Saturday because they made me feel accepted. They welcomed me and became like my family which I didn't have at the time.

Something I really loved about them was that their church was so diverse. There were so many different kinds of people there, I really felt welcome. Because growing up churches seemed so segregated. I'm biracial, my mom is white and my dad is black so growing up we either went to the white church or the black church. And at both I felt like people would stare at me and my family and that I wasn't welcome there.

So it felt really nice to have such a diverse church where I felt truly welcomed. Anyway, I ended up making a lot of friends there and I stayed with them for about 6 months. Then I figured out they were actually a cult. It's a long story but I won't go into it because this isn't even the main part yet.

After leaving the World Mission Society I felt really lonely again because I lost the only friends and sense of belonging I had. But I had to just keep going.

Maybe about 3 months later this random Korean guy approached me on campus and he asked me if I'd like to participate in a survey thing about the bible. I was skeptical at first because my previous church had told me that every Korean person was a part of their church. (Which obviously is NOT true). But my mind was thinking, "Oh no, what if they are trying to get back to me."

But I decided that it's not right to assume that this man is a part of that cult just because he's Korean. So I agreed to participate in this survey and I gave him my phone number.

Basically, a professor was writing a book where she'd answer people's most common questions about the bible. And she was surveying students to collect questions for the book. It sounded pretty cool to me so I was very interested.

I met up with the professor at a Starbucks on campus and I answered her questions about things I've always wondered about the bible. We'll call this lady Anya.

During our meeting, I expressed to Anya how I felt discarded by god because of my previous cult experience. I felt like I wasn't worthy of his love and I was very ashamed of what I did. Because we would literally pray to a human man who claimed to be god. After leaving I knew that wasn't true, and I figured god no longer loved me for what I did.

Anya was so encouraging and kind. She told me that is it 100% untrue, and that god does love me. That he put me through that experience for a reason and it only made me stronger.

Then she offered to do some bible study lessons with me so I could learn things the right way and start to feel a little bit better about my situation. And of course, I agreed. I was desperate to redeem myself and make friends again.

So I started going to this bible study once a week. Which turned to twice a week. Which turned into me going to some woman's house to have lessons. We'll call this woman Cara.

Cara was from Korea and so was her husband, they were extremely nice and welcomed me into their home. They would feed me ramen and cool snacks, and I honestly felt like a part of their family. There were lots of people in this bible study too and I made a ton of friends.

So fast forward, I had been studying the bible with them for about a year now. And nothing crazy, I was learning about the parables of the bible and the meanings of all those things in the bible that make no sense. It was very informative and interesting but nothing outlandish.

They sit us down for this big "reveal" about who the 2nd coming of Jesus is. Now they hyped it up so much and they told us that we can't judge this person no matter what. This whole time I thought it was going to be someone crazy like Kanye West or something. But no, it was an old Korean man.

He seemed unassuming enough? I had never heard of him so I didn't know why they made such a big deal out of it.

Now at this point, you are probably thinking, "Why the hell would you fall for this again?" Listen, trust me I was frustrated with myself when I left but you have to understand these people love-bombed me when I had no one. They became my family when I had none. They lied to me for an entire year so I'd trust them and get close to them before they revealed who they really were.

And they were a church called Shincheonji.

And I had no problem accepting this because these people had been my family and my best friends for an entire year. They'd feed me, watch movies with me, do anything to help me out. So I trusted them wholeheartedly. But really I was just being brainwashed.

So after I found out that they were Shincheonji they put me in their group for advanced students. And I'd begin studying multiple times a week at Cara's house and Anya was always there too. I would join the twice-weekly sermons via zoom as well. Where one of the Korean tribe leaders would give a sermon about something. I was in the Mathias tribe by the way, though that doesn't really matter.

I would do so so much with them, we even all went on a road trip to Houston where the other branch was. They even got me a birthday cake and surprised me for my birthday too. It was honestly great, and I loved them a lot.

We were basically encouraged to recruit as many people as we can because if we don't they will go to hell. They put so much pressure on us for this. They'd say things like, "Don't you want to save them?" And I am a very empathetic person so I felt like omg I want to save everyone! But on the other hand, ever since I joined Shincheonji my anxiety and depression went through the roof. The pressure to save the entire world is a lot for a 21-year-old girl. So I never recruited anyone myself because I didn't want them to have to struggle with the same mental health issues I did when I joined.

I also had some physical health issues arise as well. Their teachings would always preach how "The word of god is all the food we need." How spiritual food was more important than physical food. And that really stuck with me, especially when I got food poisoning and I couldn't eat solid food for two weeks. Something about not eating made me feel good. Like I didn't even need food because the word of god was enough, so why not just not eat at all? Not eating felt like the only thing I could control, so I clung to it. And I became anorexic. Being with Shinchenji was the only time I was ever considered underweight.

Anyway, I have so many crazy stories to tell about my time with them but I'll save those for another day.

I had been with them for about two and a half years before I started to question things.

We got a new teacher from Korea to replace Cara because she was going to have a baby. And this new teacher was a lot different and a lot less loving and nurturing than Cara had been.

She had said some things that I didn't agree with, and it started putting some doubt in my mind.

Ok so, on a side note I used to work at the library at my school doing data entry in the basement. And I would listen to podcasts a lot throughout the day as I did my work.

One day I found an interesting podcast about cults, where the host would bring cult victims onto the show and they'd tell their story. Well I was listening to an episode about the Moonies and I thought to myself, "Huh, they sound very similar to Shincheonji in some ways..."

But I knew I could not think such thoughts and that if I did any research then the devil would poison me through the internet. And I needed to strengthen my spirit for even thinking of such a thing.

So I went to reddit, and I found a subreddit called r/Shincheonji. I was like, "Oh yes! Now I can talk to other Shincheonji members and we can strengthen each other's faith!"

But it wasn't a subreddit for believers. It was a subreddit for ex-members and people who were against Shincheonji.

And at this point, I had already seen enough to plant that seed of doubt in me. I read more and more even though Shincheonji warned me I'd be poisoned if I ever researched them. But I couldn't stop myself.

I went through so much inner turmoil, you guys have no idea. My reality was crumbling so hard and I felt like my world was ending. It's hard to explain, but I was so indoctrinated and brainwashed by this point. This really ruined me.

I had to mourn the loss of all of the family and friends I gained these past years. I would cry almost every night because I missed them, and it was so hard to accept that they never truly loved me at all. To be honest, I still think about some of them to this day and I hope they got out and found peace in their lives.

No one in my life had known I was a part of Shincheonji. My closest friends nor my family, who had slowly started talking to me again. But I had to tell someone so I told my childhood best friend, we'll call him Blaine.

I got in a Playstation party with Blaine and I just cried. I cried so so much, and he was so confused. But eventually, I told him everything. And he was really supportive and gave me no judgment at all.

My main issue was, how could I leave? I have quite literally been living a double life this entire time and not having that scared the shit out of me. But Blaine advised me to cut them off completely and just leave without saying anything. Because his concern was that if they got the chance to talk to me, they would most certainly be able to pull me back in. And I know them well enough to know this is true. So that's exactly what I did, I left and went cold turkey. I even went as far as changing my work schedule too.

And here's where things get creepy.

I hadn't spoken to them for about a week now, and I'm at work. I'm working as usual in the basement on the computers and low and behold, three girls walk in. Girls from my cult, girls that I was close to.

Now students aren't allowed to just waltz into this room so they had some big balls to do that. But the weird thing was, I had completely changed my schedule and I was working on a day I normally had off. They should have had no idea I was there.

But here they were, holding a large cup of boba from my favorite place. And in my favorite flavor too, winter milk cap with mango popping bubbles.

They came up to me and said, "Hey girl, we noticed you haven't been coming to worship lately. Is everything alright?"

I said, "Oh uh yeah everything's fine! I've just been super busy with work and a ton of projects for class..."

"Ok, well we got this for you," they handed me the boba, "We were hoping to talk to you. We can wait for you outside and talk to you when you get off."

I started panicking so I said, "My mom is actually picking me up as soon as I get off so I won't be able to, I'm sorry! Maybe another time though, I'll text you."

They were convinced by my response so they left. And boy did I RUN so fucking fast after I got off work. I even called Blaine so he could talk to me in case they came after me, but luckily they didn't and I got home ok.

He started yelling at me for drinking the boba saying, "YOU IDIOT! THEY PROBABLY POISONED IT!"

But hey, free boba is free boba.

Anyway, after that event I knew I had to text that girl and tell her I was deciding to leave Shinchenji because I didn't want them to show up at my job again or follow me around.

So I texted her, trying to be as nice as possible and explain to her that I just couldn't do it anymore. I told her how this affected my mental health and my physical health. How I developed an eating disorder from being in Shincheonji too.

Her response was really rude and condescending. She said my mental health issues and my eating disorder were my fault and the work of satan trying to blame them. She told me that once I leave I can never be accepted into heaven, that I'm damning myself to hell as well as all of my family members. I'll be honest, she made me feel incredibly guilty and selfish for leaving. Their teachings were still ingrained in me. But I knew that I could never return after everything, so I blocked her and never spoke to her again.

Oh yeah and that book the professor was writing in the beginning, that wasn't real and she wasn't a professor. It was just a ruse to lure students in.

I will admit I could never get their teachings out of my head. And to this day, even though I know they were wrong, a part of me believes I am going to hell for what I did and all of my family will suffer because of me. So now I can't even look at a bible, and I no longer consider myself religious.

And after this experience, I reached out to that cult podcast that helped me realize I was also in a cult, and I got an episode of my own where I got to tell my story.

So yeah haha that's my story!

Today only my close friends know, and I never told my parents. They still have no idea and honestly, I don't know if I will ever tell them.

I'm still really plagued by a lot of things they did, and my worldview has never been the same. My life has never been the same. But I've been cult free for about 2 years now so I'm just taking it one day at a time.

I'm sorry this was so long. But if you read the whole thing I want to say thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for reading my story. And if you are a college student, please be careful because cults like this are rampant on college campuses, especially in the U.S.

After leaving the cult, I needed something to obsess over, something to make me feel normal. And that was Gyutaro! And I gotta say, obsessing over him is much healthier than obsessing over the teachings of a cult.

Anyway, I want you all to know that this blog has been an escape for me and helped me to feel normal again after this experience. And I don't need a cult to make me feel loved anymore. Because I have all of you :)

[deeplyobsessed]

ok so i’m gonna ramble in sections

section 1: cgi moustache

FUCKING HILARIOUS like it was so bad it was funny HELP also buck’s hair was season 8 hair too it’s so funny like WHY did they reuse this HAHA

section 2: confession part 1

as short of a scene as it was, this was really nicely shot imo. and the tears in eddie’s eyes when he spoke like RYAN GUZMAN UR SO GOOD. but also how does buck (best friend) rank about girlfriend like hmmmmmmm

section 3: FUCKING ABBY

I CLOCKED IT I KNEW IT i know we always joke about 911 having continuity issues but THIS was such a good way to call back season 1 like insane writing tim minear and i love u for it

section 4: the divorce call

i wish they did more with this call like there was potential to call back to eddie/shannon but they didn’t. other than that i think honestly this is one of the grossest calls they’ve ever been on like genuinely icked the hell out of me with the guts like ugh gross

section 5: josh’s speech

as much as people hate on tommy, i do think josh’s explanation of things does give some sort of context to the way tommy acted in the past. like yeah racism and sexism is bad don’t get me wrong, but tommy did make an effort to change. it’s just that with society and his own work place back then, tommy prob had a lot of internalised homophobia that he expressed negatively outward to others (chim and hen in particular). but josh made a very good point with his speech about pre glee and post glee world (great reference, 10/10) and i think this was one of my favourite parts of this episode

section 6: confession part 2

ok first of all there was literally NO NEED to add that “im straight” “im celibate” part. like that was intentionally written into the script for something bcos that entire section could have been done without the sexuality mention. tim minear i see you. other than that FATHER BRIAN YOU ARE SPEAKING FACTS. my fav line he said was “but we can’t take care of others if we don’t first take care of ourselves”. bcos this is true!! and also a line used in therapy a lot cough. anyway i think the conversation eddie had with the priest was like a wake up call to eddie to start getting his head out of his ass and start working towards something. love this scene 10/10

section 7: brothers and pipes

most of this call was focused on the brothers part more than the well scene call back, tho there was a throw away line from bobby to eddie about how (eddie) wouldn’t fit this time. i do wonder if this happened irl would fire departments legally be authorised to allow children to help with rescues tho. otherwise honestly this was a very cute scene that helped chim get some introspection. i do wish there was more of a well scene call back tho :(

section 8: buck tommy breakup

as a buddie fan, i am overjoyed. but as a buck fan, i am devastated. tommy is actually one of my favourite love interests for buck, and its not just because he’s a dude and sexual awakening all that. i genuinely do think buck and tommy could have had a lot of potential if the show had decided to go through with it, but at the same time ending it here was also a relatively good note. i think in this relationship it wasn’t actually buck who wasn’t ready, it was tommy. tommy is afraid of things not working out in the long run bcos he doesn’t believe in buck’s affection for him being long term. this whole breakup was bcos tommy wasn’t ready imo. i do see the point tommy was trying to make but i also think it was a bit of a dick move to do the whole breakup immediately after buck asked tommy to move in with him. like the timing could have been better tommy. tommy being the one who decided to end things did surprise me tho. but now i feel really sad for buck bcos buck did like tommy a lot, and also as a queer person your first queer relationship is always going to mean a lot to you

section 9: MADNEY MADNEY MADNEY

HOLY MOTHER OF- i didn’t see this coming i didn’t but i am so here for it. the amount of trust and communication between chim and maddie is literal relationship GOALS like they lay out the boundaries and have healthy discussions about having another kid and it’s just so UGHHHH I LOVE YOU also maddie already being pregnant FJSJCKSK MORE BABIES

section 10: eddie, the moustache, and the dance

this. was. everything. the significance of shaving off the moustache. the dancing at the end?? no pants too was a choice. like when eddie flops back onto the couch and you see his smile, it’s like you truly see him deciding to finally forgive himself. maybe not completely, because there’s always going to be some guilt he carries around, but he’s moving forward and i’m so, so happy for him. it’s just a fun goofy feel good scene and i love love love this.

special mention: buddie and the couch

i actually think this is the first time both of them are on the couch together. like sitting next to each other with no one else. RETURN OF THE COUCH THEORY WELCOME BACK. ok but the ending scene?? the way they don’t even need words to communicate like- buck not even bothering to question why eddie doesn’t have pants, and eddie not even questioning why buck is here with beer in the first place. the level of mutual understanding has my HEART IN PIECES

overall this is honestly my fav ep this season and one of my fav eps of all time. i can’t wait to see how the story moves on from here ahhhhhhh

[uplatterme]

a/n: im putting the warnings first this time because the writing style is a bit different. also, it really isn’t clear what actually happened to sohreh so this whole thing is just a fun interpretation is all.

cw: violence, murder, dark content (this is insane, like actually. please read with caution) | sub!zandik, zandik!dottore, gender-neutral terms and pronouns but reader has a cock, exhibitionism, semi-public sex

———

Journal Entry No. XX (Recorded on: ??-??-??)

—Written By: (Dastur Sohreh)

These reports seemed to have been stained heavily with bodily fluids. Certain words are unreadable.

—The team consisted of renowned students of the Akademiya, including; Sohreh, Zandik, XXXX, and XXXX. This team was led by Sage Shanarma and Senior ▇▇.

Each one had brought something new to the plate, despite not getting along at first due to different views on the decisions that the team followed. Notably, from Zandik, whose suggestions seemed to be far too dangerous to even try, that was immediately shut down without even a second thought.

However, Senior ▇▇ always heard him out and always stood by his side whenever there were arguments. Rumors spread throughout the team about their supposed relationship.

Being scholars of the Akademiya meant that we should always rely on facts rather than meaningless accusations. Once I told them of this, the gossip was never brought up.

▇▇ was kind to everyone, even to me. They would always assist me whenever I had trouble walking because of the heat.

I had an ominous feeling that someone was glaring at me from behind whenever I was helped, but when I turned around, there was no one but the forest itself.

Perhaps, it was just my anxiety acting up from feeling as if I wasn’t contributing much to the group. ▇▇ reassured me I was doing just fine.

—I trusted ▇▇’s words about Zandik. I once found myself exploring the jungle with him and even though the start of our expedition proved that we had nothing in common, he opened up interesting topics to discuss, ranging from plants and animals to the current evolution models.

I found myself being taken aback by him, the way he spoke showed off his clearly high intellect. His appearance is also quite attractive. I sometimes matched my gaze with him intentionally and he would return it with a smile that made my heart flutter.

Unfortunately, I grew distant from Senior as I relied on this information to them. They said encouraging words about Zandik and I’s relationship but their eyes looked saddened, almost empty the longer I observed them.

They never approached me after that and the only time they would talk to me is if I approached them first.

Maybe it was true that there was a past relationship between Zandik and Senior ▇▇? If there was, it didn’t seem to matter to Zandik anymore as he agreed when I suggested that we should go on a picnic tonight.

The picnic was lovely but I couldn’t get the feeling off my back that someone was watching us together.

———

The next writings are written with blood, the writing is shaky and incomprehensible as if it was written with pure desperation.

You let out an amused sigh, taking your pen out from the drawer under your stable.

“Such a shame, Sohreh. You didn’t even get to finish this note. Should I help you out?”

You tapped the pen on the table, wondering where to start.

———

You commended your patience at the time. Seeing Zandik with someone else and not doing anything about it? You honestly couldn’t believe it.

It was obvious that he didn’t like the attention he was receiving. That’s what you told yourself, at least. You couldn’t figure out what it was that he was using Sohreh for.

Then again, he was never the one to just simply spit out answers without a price.

There wasn’t exactly a label between you two. So perhaps you shouldn’t even be jealous to begin with. 

Oh, please.

The expedition was going far too smooth for your liking anyways.

The violent and loud mechanic noises rang in your ears. There were screams all coming from the team, wondering what it is that they should do.

Yet, out of all the horrified faces on each of them, one stood out.

A face of shock that soon turned into a gleeful one, excited for something new. Knowledge, that would soon quench his thirst at the moment.

He was truly an eccentric one. 

You smiled as he took a step forward, and eventually, those slow steps hastened, running to the ruin guard instead of backing away.

The scholar beside you, however, still hadn’t reacted. Sohreh’s shaking. The poor thing was terrified, legs giving up and failing to notice the ruin guard eyeing her way.

You could pull her away in time if you wanted to. There was enough time to keep her out of harm’s way.

If only she listened to those rumors.

The ruin guard had attacked Sohreh, her body flopping to the floor. The sound of bones breaking stood out from the screaming and metallic noises.

You clap your hands together, gaining the attention of everyone.

“Zandik’s trying to fix the problem right now. Everyone, focus on your surroundings, don’t make unnecessary movements that’ll trigger more reactions.” You directed, ignoring the groaning of the woman below your knees.

Suffice to say, each one was horrified. There were minor injuries that the others had gotten but nothing severe. You could see how grateful they were that they didn’t end up like Sohreh, who was now laying on the ground, in dire need of medical treatment.

In the end, these scholars only valued themselves.

“Senior? What should we do?” One of them had asked, bearing a pathetic look on their face, avoiding the gruesome state of the body placed on a picnic blanket that somebody had found.

“We will return at once.”

Zandik stepped in front of you, not agreeing with that choice.

“Should we not bring this machine back to the Akademiya? I can guarantee that this can prove to be useful in different ways! It’s the first we’ve seen of this kind.” He enthusiastically said.

The others did not appeal to that thought.

It seemed that these scholars did not value the life that was slowly withering away next to them, choosing to argue instead of seeking the medical attention that Sohreh clearly needed.

“Are you insane? That thing cannot be brought back to the Akademiya! It will spur chaos with the sages!”

“And you have seen my prowess, have you not? I was the only one with the slightest clue on how to keep it dormant while you stood there like cowards!” Zandik angrily shouted back, biting his teeth together.

This silenced the arguing. He was right and everyone knew that. Without his help, who knew what else could have happened instead?

You sighed at the useless bickering. The priorities of these people were laughable.

“We’ll have to hear from the Sages, Zandik,” You reassured.

“Meanwhile, as Sohreh cannot travel. I’m requesting everyone to seek help from the Akademiya, a healer preferably, or anyone that you could reach out to as quickly as you can.”

“Well, aren’t you just as mischievous as before?” Zandik stated, no longer keeping his thoughts as everyone besides you two had left to get assistance.

“I’m not sure what you’re talking about.”

“Is that how you want to take this conversation?” He huffed, walking towards you—no, walking towards Sohreh.

He examined her body, guts almost slipping out of her torso, her right leg dislocated. Her blood seeped to the picinic blanket that they had used during their date.

It was honestly a miracle that she was still breathing at this point.

And almost as if she could hear your thoughts. Sohreh’s eyes opened, directly facing Zandik.

“Z-Zandik?” She mustered out, coughing and spitting out blood from her throat.

“It’s alright, I’ve taken care of the ruin guard.”

“Of course, you would have… You’re the only capable one here.” She joked.

You stayed quiet, listening in on the conversation. You doubted she even knew that you were here.

“Are you…going to help me out?” She asked and Zandik only answered with that picture-perfect smile that he always wore when he wanted something.

The man fixed her hair, moving them away from her eyes.

“Show me.” He said.

“Wha—?!”

Zandik’s right hand went for her throat, pressing deep. Her vocal cords getting too damaged for her to even scream.

She flailed her arms around, trying to escape the scholar’s grip. Sohreh was confused by the man’s new behavior. She was mouthing out several words that fell silent.

Her reactions were quite beautiful. Sohreh had always been expressive, putting everything on her sleeve. It would make sense that he wanted a better view when he finally ended this whole thing.

It was then that she decided that she couldn’t escape from this man alone. She needed someone, anyone to help her. Her eyes scouted the empty forest when she saw a familiar hair color.

“S-Senior!” She choked out, her voice hoarse and ruined.

“Zandik.” Once he heard his name being called out, he stopped.

He stared at you, those eyes that only focused on him. Oh, how grateful he was that you two were the only ones here.

Zandik dropped the woman without a care, her whole body trembling from barely escaping death. She was glad that you had intervened before it was too late.

“You shouldn’t use your dainty hands for something like this, Zandik.” You cooed and got up from your seat, approaching him.

You took his hands, bringing them to your lips, kissing them softly.

Sohreh couldn’t believe what was happening right in front of her eyes. Dainty? He had almost killed her and yet you were treating him as if he was porcelain?

“I missed this. Don’t you also?” You tilted your head as you asked him, Zandik blushing deep from your affection.

“Of course.”

“Why don’t you prove it?”

Sohreh watched in pure agony, she could barely move and even if she did, she wouldn’t get far. The pain was too much to bear to even try. Her wounds grinded against the rocky and dirty ground whenever she breathed too hard.

She could hear her organs slushing as if they were jelly. She didn’t know if it was because the whole thing made her senses more aware or if it was like that in reality.

The worse part was that you and Zandik didn’t pay any attention to her. As if you two were already set that she would die in her state, as if she was a dying cockroach that lay beneath your feet.

“You don’t know how insufferable it was holding myself back, Zandik.” You said, trailing kisses on his chest.

“To think you’d be so touchy with someone else. You really are a slut, aren’t you?” You spat out before biting his skin, your teeth going so deep that blood dripped down to his stomach.

God, Zandik could have finished right then and there.

“I’m sorry…I didn’t mean to.” He apologized, face pouting as he said.

You chuckled at his expression. “You liar, I know you liked the attention.”

“I only like attention when it’s coming from you.” He refuted, snugging his head to your chest.

“Yeah? How could I be sure about that?”

He unbuttoned his pants, showing off everything to you. “Look at what you’ve done. Already so wet for you. I’m your slut, not anybody else’s.”

“Ah, Zandik. You know just the right words to say.” You laughed.

He grinded himself on your leg, rubbing his groin as he stared into your eyes. Lewd noises slipped out of his throat, missing how you took care of him. You pat his head and immediately, you received a whimper from Zandik.

You enjoyed the noises that Zandik made, huffs and breaths of your name as he pleasured himself with your body, begging for more.

Unfortunately, that was hindered by a scream from Sohreh whose throat you were sure would render her to never speak again. Not that it mattered, since there was no way she would be coming out of this forest alive.

You held onto Zandik’s thigh, stilling him in disappointment. “As much as I do love hearing you scream for mercy, I’m busy right now.”

She glared at you, obviously wanting to curse you out.

“However, you do remember that we’re not the only ones in this forest. I hear tigers have pretty good hearing. Ah, but you probably already knew that, being a student of Amurta and all.”

Once you reminded her, you could see fear strike in her eyes. To think she would be afraid of tigers more than you. How stupid really.

Zandik placed his ass on your lap, wanting your eyes on him.

“Need you.” He said.

“I’m sure you can do it by yourself now, no?” You answered, a flustered Zandik coughed, remembering the last time he tried to ride you.

Carefully and slowly, Zandik placed the tip of your cock near his entrance. He grit his teeth together, already feeling your warmth inside him when you’re still not all the way in.

An idea formed in your head. 

“Love, can you face the other way?” You asked him.

Zandik couldn’t believe that you’d only tell him this right now when he’s almost done taking in your whole length. 

Well, he could, being mean to him was your forte and he enjoyed every part of it.

He rolled his eyes back from taking you out, feeling empty.

Zandik’s back is now faced against you. You could see his hole open up as he inserted your cock inside of him.

“I’m feeling nice, Sohreh. So, I’ll give you a lesson on how to properly use Zandik.”

Zandik bounced against your thighs, moaning each time he slapped skin with you. “Haah~” 

“I’ve rammed into him so many times and he’s still just as sensitive. Isn’t he great?”

Zandik whined in agreement, hearing you praise and show him off to someone else extremely turning him on.

Sohreh could only look in horror, seeing the man he admired of, moving like an animal in heat, desperate for his senior’s cock.

“See here, if you give him a slight spank.” You continued, slapping the side of his ass as gently as you were able to.

Zandik yelped, cum leaking out of his cock.

He faced down lower, gasping for air as he could feel another orgasm coming.

“P-Please–! Let me–ah!”! He pleaded your name asking for permission, which you were proud to give.

His entire body shuddered as he came, cum splattering everywhere, even to the half-dead person on the ground.

“You did so good, Zandik.”

“T-Thank you…!” He squeaked out.

Sohreh wanted to vomit, you two were insane. If the Akademiya had access to this information then—!

Her hands searched for the notepad in her pockets. With no other option, she used the blood leaking out excessively from her body.

“What are you doing?”

Sohreh tried to hide away the evidence but it was stolen quickly. 

“You really are amazing. To think you’re still alive right now, even when I purposely let you get hit by that ruin guard.”

She stared in confusion. This whole thing…was your fault?

“Oh, don’t blame this on me. You were the one who went after Zandik. I’d say this makes us even, doesn’t it?”

Your hand reached for her neck, matching the bruises that Zandik had left earlier.

You squeezed hard, Sohreh losing the strength to even fight back. 

Realizing that you had gone too far, you snapped out of your daze, quickly apologizing to Zandik.

“Sorry! Did you have business with her still?”

Zandik swallowed the lump in his throat, amazed at how your muscles flexed when you strangled the body.

He could feel himself getting hard again, everything you do really, sent a rushing thrill to his spine.

“C-Could you do that to me?”

You slammed yourself into Zandik’s walls, the scholar moaning in pleasure as his back laid down on the corpse which was now used as a cushion as he pleasantly received your thrusts.

The body turned into a mess as you continued pounding in him roughly and as quickly as you can, knowing that you two had only so much time before someone else got here.

“M-More! More!” Zandik begged, his head rolling back from the intense sensations.

“As you wish, love.”

[mayxo-hxh]

Hi, I love your take on Hisoka, it's made me view him in a different light. I was wondering what ur take on illumi is? Do you have any headcanons for him? I saw ur post on Hisoka being shy, do u think Illumi is the same? (If u have any hisoillu headcanons too I'd love to hear them) :D

Hello!! Im really happy to hear that :)

I have LOOOTS of hcs for the both of them!! Ive been fixated on these two for four whole years i genuinely have too much to mention in one post lol so if you have any specific questions about specific hcs, do tell me!! Its a bit difficult to answer very broad questions like this bcs i dont know where to begin haha;;

I can very confidently say though, Illumi is absolutely nowhere near shy. At least-- not by the definition. In my eyes, Illumi is a very blunt and straightforward person with no social filter. I do like to think when it comes to hisoillu in general Illumi gets flustered here and there when dealing with his husband like any normal human in love is to be. But when it comes to being an actual shy introvert like hisoka-- absolutely not. You can tell the difference between how Illumi deals with people vs Hisoka. Hisoka is like the textbook definition of an introvert-- someone who constantly avoids people unless he wants to be the center of attention (mainly negative attention so it keeps people away anyways)

General hisoillu hcs would be... I like to humanize them. I like giving Illumi moles, stretch marks and arthritis from his transformation and eyebags from the amount of times he stays up for his missions. Also scars from his training that are faded. For hobbies I like to think hes extremely interested in learning. Just learning. Whatever hes learning doesnt matter, but knowledge is a very prominent fact about him and the zoldycks in general. So while I hc hes extensively knowledgable about anatomy and the economic and political states of the world (those pretty much canon tho lol) and the world in general, I like to always write him extending his knowledge in fics like learning a new language in his spare time or reading books in general. I could expand much more on hobbies including people watching and hanging out with his siblings but i feel like if there is a tumblr word limit i would 1000% exceed it lol.

I like to give Hisoka freckles on his tan skin (in the manga his skin is quite tan) that he hides and many more scars that are also hidden like he'd hide his arm scars after machi healed them. also the one time togashi drew him with hip dips. I liked that! I like to give him a human backstory like initially having a family that he either abandoned or was abandoned by to go on his own journey (not necessarily tragic, though i do not think tragic backstories take away from a character no matter how evil tbh. If anything, I strongly believe that babies are blank slates when it comes to morals until theyre taught otherwise by their environment.) And positive hobbies like cooking for himself because he only ever relies on himself and doesnt trust anybody else, which also goes with the hc of him not being a fan of taking any medication so hes a "tough it out" girlie. which also consequently affects other hcs like my trans hisoka hc and him not getting top surgery until after he married illumi because he does not trust a mf to put him under during it but he does trust illumi-- ITS A LOOONG STORY

I also like to consider their reoccurring personality traits as symptoms for neurodivergence. Like Illumi's bluntness and overly honest personality being autism and his highly emotional sides to him being BPD (i do have a thread on that!) and for Hisoka his hyperactivity and addiction for stimulating fights as ADHD (the adhd video i made abt him covers some of it lol) and you could argue a personality disorder for him as well to match with his hubby.

Also the queer hcs like i mentioned, transmasc genderfluid hisoka that doesnt mind all pronouns that i also hc as demiaroace and pansexual/bisexual while for Illumi I hc him as gay demiaroace agender, etc. These help a lot in figuring out their identities too.

Stuff like that are just the "layouts" for them in my brain that help me immensely when writing fics for them. You have to know everything extensively for the actions that they make to come naturally so when you throw them in a situation, you immediately know how they'd react (ex: sick hisoka would refuse to take meds, or more specifically like in my fic tolerate me darling hisoka was cramping and refused to take pain meds for it so illumi had to use his pins etc etc)

Those are pretty much the surface hcs i have for them that I always consider when it comes to any scenario or extra hc or fic/art or anything. For anything very specific, you'd have to ask about it for my brain to remember ehehe ^^

[crsssie]

from one admirer to another : fried?

pairing: leon kennedy x reader || masterpost: from one admirer to another

synopsis: from one admirer to another, an online penpal service, allows for two people with common interests to write to each other without ever revealing their actual address! Luckily for both you and Leon, you get matched up! What do eggs and Christmas even have in common anyway? sure hope it's that modeling business and NOT that Ada Wong addiction.

featuring: reader as scrambled eggs // leon as christmas

Dear scrambled eggs,

Happy Paris Fashion Week. I'm walking this year (finally???) but not the same show as Ada. I ended up cast by a different brand than her, which makes sense since we don't exactly share the same genre of face. Also, she's in Paris for shoots while I'm here to walk. Women and men's fashion week aren't even the same week. I found that a little sad. Also, my agent got me on some sort of makeup from my makeup artist and somehow he's made me look 29 like hello?? I am a literal child ?? (I'm not. but im still in my early twenties).

My letter this time is going to be short (again) mainly because I need to mail this internationally and I'd like for you to send me a letter to my airbnb (the host gave me the keys).

I speak Spanish and literally no French, so when a lady in a shop was talking to me I could only shake my head and tell her no in Spanish and I still have no idea what she wanted. I guess we'll never know.

Right. The last walk was alright. I got to walk with the model, but I got a death glare from their friend bc I swear I felt my soul slip out of my body. Like, sorry your friend is hot??? Sorry I'm no better??? :((( What's it take for a guy to score a date these days? I ALSO did not get their number again. Can you believe that? I turned around and they disappeared into thin air! AUGH.

Anyways, I'm sending you one of the luxury-brand paris postcards I received as a small gift. Hope you like it.

What are you up to the month that I'm stuck in Paris? Christmas

Leon finishes walking his show, backstage with a handful of models he's met here and there, mainly sticking with the group of raccoon models. Everyone's sharing the same Airbnb. It should sound like hell, except most people have their own room, and somehow it's the greatest blessing on earth because he knows Ada would ruin his life if he even thought of asking her about you.

His letter is mailed out first thing, shitty translator in hand as he's told Reverso is the better of translators for French, and he gets it mailed out with a quick wink from the old lady at the post office. He's sure she did it because he's on the more attractive side and not the fact that he's sending a letter to his penpal like some middle school boy. He should get over that crush on you too.

He starts his last walk of this fashion week, meeting new people to have a quick talk to, adding private accounts and getting to know a handful of other Ada fans at his last walk. It's the only one where he even gets to see Ada, and her walk is... no joke. Hatred be dammed that woman can strut. He wonders if there's another universe where he didn't accidentally get shot through the heart the first time he met her best friend.

The more Leon paid attention, the more he seemed to understand that one of the main reasons your contract got off so easy was because Ada had requested it. Some people even call you a result of nepotism. Well, not that you seemed to like the job all that much. Dare he say it, to you, modeling was just a side hustle.

How nice it must be to be in a position like that.

When the models finish up at the show, Leon's told he has a shoot the next day, and then a handful of shows scattered nearby. They're making him go to Spain for a handful of days for a photoshoot with Ashley, and then he's practically free for the rest of the time. He's sure it's because his manager's girlfriend wants to hang around the city. Leon's more than fine with staying in the city. It'll be a good break.

Shame though, he misses Sunny.

prev letter : masterlist : next letter

[clowns0up-felix]

Coming back to tell you how much I love that little comic with the Chosen Hero and the Hero of Men. There's no dialogue, but it still has a strong sense of sadness and hope. And the parallels between the two are fantastic, I really wish Nintendo gave us more information about what happened between Skyward Sword and Minish Cap because now I'm really thinking about it and how whatever happened had to be pretty scary if the Hero of Men decided it was in everyone's best interest for him to yoink the Chosen Hero's sacred sword from its temple.

All those words to say your art is wonderful and I'm thinking about it and the piece of LoZ lore it represents. ❤️

Ohhhh my go yesssss I would give my life to know more about the hero of men,,, its literally crazy to me that there’s a link that’s just. There. No game no story no nothing. WHO IS THAT TELL ME?? Thinking about who he could’ve been is one of the joys of life but it tends to feel more like writing an OC than expanding on known lore, bc be barely have any,,,

Actually, Ill use this to ramble about what I do tend to think for him here, hope that’s okay!!

I love love love that u said that what was happening during the hero of men’s time had to be pretty scary, bc YEAH. To pull the sword of the first hero and first king of Hyrule (^.^) who probably would kill to not have fi be woken up is CRAZYYYY,,, either he’s oblivious or in a really bad situation,,, What is known about him leaves to believe that he was a knight tho, and they 100% knew about fis resting ground,, It is said that the world was about to be swallowed by evil, which makes me think Botw final cutscene or sksw final girahim type severity of monster floods. So I think hom (ill refer to the hero of men like this for now) link probably saw getting the sacred, legendary master sword as his only chance at saving hyrule.

Idk if he would’ve know himself to be the legendary hero reborn due to triforce mark, maybe he just stumbled across it in an attempt to hide some injured knights in the temple of hylia,,,, Side note on the temple of hylia, love the abandoned look in the comic but it doesn’t really make sense, does it? Bc why would sksw Link want fis resting place to not be well kept? Would he visit before his passing?

Anyway, he takes the sword defeats the monster hoards and gives hyrule a brief moment of safety. He’s made into a high ranking knight or maybe head of the knights (he’s probably rather young still, as that seems to be a theme for the chosen hero and priestess, so maybe late teens, and before having the master sword he was a knight in training?) and then, when the picori/minish come down to earth (i dunno from where, was that ever said? Just from the skies i thiinkkk,,,) he gets the picori blade and I think the light force from them. It’s similar use does bring up the question why hom link would use the picori blade over the master sword,, maybe because its a gift and the master sword is like this sacred sword meant to rest and that got him feeling bad hahaha,, Hom link trapped the monsters rather than killing them but I can’t remember if the trapped them in the sword or the chest or somewhere else hmm,,, the sword later turns into the four sword right? (I’m so sorry im too lazy rn to do research 😭) I don’t think hom link would’ve been able to use it as this tho, i think he never got it to a point like this, just used it to save the world once and then gave it away for the contest ^^ In one of the stained glass the sword he gets DOES look like the four sword but i am going to ignore that bc I think i can.

Also, for reasons that I can’t (don’t want to) talk about rn I personally would change it being the 50th anniversary of the Picori Festival instead of the 100th ^.^ also I think hom link would stay a close friend to the royal family partially to protect the holder of the light force which was sealed into his Zelda i think and passed down to her children and their children yk,, and don’t tell anyone I said this but he is alive during minish cap and ezlo was one of the minish that gave him the blade during the Force era ;)

I also think the minish weren’t really ever introduced to the public but instead kept in strict contact to the royal family and those they trusted, which is why during mc basically no one knows about them, and those that once did are already fairly old or dead.

I’m not gonna read this over, hope everything makes sense and is coherent

Thanks for the ask !!!!! Drawing the comic was so fun I’m happy u like it :D

[saturnservers]

Since I've started studying film and video editing (technically film radio and video in general buuuut....), can I just say I find everyone in lifesteal, or maybe even just that entire corner of mcyt, editing style fascinating? I especially think PrinceZam is very unique. it's so intimate in a way?

It's the kind of video you'd make for a friend to explain something, of course you wouldn't if you don't have a passion for editing (one could argue Zams love for editing is teetering.... haha! jokes ^_^) Point is, Zams videos are always fun to watch and less intense to digest? Which is wonderful compared to other povs, sometimes I just want to watch an interesting pov, that offers a good story, someone who is constantly active on the server...

-

update: i am writing this at 2am dec 24 2024, i have to power through a 3 hour drive at 7am.. t minus 5 hours.... guys zams editing is peak if u take in the contrast of his streams... (like his editings already good but w the streams?!?!?!?!?!)

like if u watch a zam stream and then u watch his videos you go, "yeah! i would summarize princezams cubito life in a video this way! yes!" but if ur a yt viewer (hi! me! that was me ^_^) and then join his streams.... the contrast is actually so amazing.. his streams are so highstakes... like in his videos i'd go "aww jeez... oh no pz... you're really in the deep end now..." as in... i react emotionally, this is true!! but now i watch his streams and... i have to watch the vods for the videos now... anyways! i love princezam video editing!!! i will make a proper analysis because i personally... enjoy... the tech behind a story..... uhm. video editor / sound engineer here!!! im a nerd for that sort of junk.. but yes! i love! tech!!!!!!!!!!! yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!