#im tossing myself into the void

[ruvi-muffin]

I'll be thinking about Essek and Caleb's shared study and shared house and shared clothes for forever actually

[waterfallofspace]

What A Way To Start A Year

T/im learns a little something about karma, friends, and care. Seems even J/on isn't quite as cold as he seems.

A M/agnus A/rchives fic, set somewhere pre-season 1. Shouldn't have any spoilers, but proceed with caution just incase~ (nothing late game, just character dynamic things)

Welcome to "I meant for this to be a little drabble and I wrote 3k words"~ Having a bit of hyperfixation and burn out as I started this new year, soooo I decided to make T/im suffer <3 Not promising quality seeing as I wrote this all in the span of tonight, but consider it a lil 'too long' drabble, and happy new years!

Best way to start off the new year, giving one of your lil guys a lil snz <3

Characters: T/im, M/artin, S/asha, and J/on. Word Count: 3.9k

(CW: There is some swearing, and light descriptions of high fevers)

Christmas had been good this year, maybe the best it had in a long time. Life of the party as always, Tim had enjoyed getting to spend it with his old, and new, colleagues. On top of that, Jon had been laid up with a pretty awful cold for a couple days leading up to it, so he wasn’t around to crush any brilliant ideas Tim came up with. 

This led to the budget receiving a fairly substantial hit, though many researchers donated to the cause when they learned this borrowing wasn’t exactly approved. Hell, even Elias had pitched in, claiming something or other about ‘archivists fit for the job not exactly growing on trees’, and wanting to ‘save some of Jon’s sanity’. 

“Tim? Are you even listening to me?”  

Pulled back to the conversation at hand, Tim lifts his gaze to the taller man fidgeting nervously in front of him. Martin was never one for confrontations, and usually the first ‘no’ would have been more than enough to lead to a string of apologies for even asking. Today however, he seems to have grown a spine. At the worst possible moment. 

“Oh come on,” Martin continues, missing the groan slipping from Tim’s throat. “Even Jon agreed to it!” 

“I’m not really in the party mood,” Tim retorts, leaning back in his chair. “Besides, Jon didn’t agree to celebrate, he agreed not to stop the celebration. Not the same thing.” 

From across her desk, Sasha gives a low chuckle. “He’s got you there, Martin.”

“Can you at least give it a little thought before turning it down?” Martin insists, completely out of character for someone usually so eager to please. 

What the hell has gotten into him today? He didn’t even seem to enjoy himself that much at the Christmas party. Sure, he had a few drinks and mingled with the staff, but he’d left as soon as it was over, not waiting around for chatting like Tim and Sasha.

Clearing his throat with a grimace, Tim casts Sasha a dark look as she chuckles again. Knowing far too much, as usual. Especially when it came to him. If it was anyone else, Tim would hate it with all his being, but given that it’s Sasha… well it’s a welcome invasion. 

Still, it would be nice if she didn’t rat him out. And to Martin of all people, well let’s just say he saw what happened when Jon was sick. Yeah, passing on that one. Attention is great, Tim lives for it, but the coddling? Not really his style. 

“hiEH– guh…”

Damn, that had been a close one. Thankfully Martin seems oblivious, though Sasha sits up in her chair, reaching down into a drawer to fish something out. 

Turning his focus back to Martin, Tim provides an offer, desperate to just have the interaction come to an end. 

“Fine, I’ll show up, but I don’t want any part in planning it.” 

“Oh of course, I’ll handle all the details, I mean it’s just a new years party, how much can there really be to do? I mean food, timing, gotta make sure we have keys to the building– oh but if Jon’s there, that shouldn’t be a problem…” Martin says, rambling beginning to fade into the background as Tim finds himself unable to- 

“hH– ek’CHhiew!” 

“-Oh, bless you!” Martin says, his own thoughts long forgotten. 

Unable to get a word out, Tim merely waves a hand, ducking into his shoulder for another, “eTChhew!” 

“Bles-” 

And another, “iTSChh’ew!” 

“Oh ble-” 

And another, “ehh– kTChh’iew!” 

Silently Sasha stands, handing Tim a pack of tissues. Must have been what she was looking for in the desk. Once again, knowing more than she should, of course she picked up on his patterns. 

Accepting them gratefully, Tim pulls a few out and roughly rubs at his nose, pointedly avoiding Martin’s worried gaze. Gripping his still trembling nose through the tissue, Tim sucks in a tight breath through his teeth, holding for a beat, before finally spinning around in his chair for a final- 

“hH’ETCSHh-ieuw! Whew, bless me.” 

Martin’s hands are fidgeting again, seemingly unsure of what to do with himself as Tim gives his nose a light massage through the tissue. He’s aware enough not to point it out, but is nearly shaking with the effort of suppressing his concerns. 

With a sigh, Tim meets his eyes. “I’m fine, Martin. I always sneeze like that.” He leaves out ‘when I’m sick’. It also happens if he’s suffering allergies, though he doubts that would be a point in his defense given it’s the middle of winter. 

“Yeah he’s not kidding,” Sasha pipes up, throwing Tim a wink as he glares. “You should hear him in spring, once it starts he can be going for hours.” 

“I wouldn’t say hours, Sash-” 

“Remember the cherry blossom incident?” Sasha interrupts, sending a sugary smile over to Martin. “He was wrecked for the rest of the day, I was almost certain he was never gonna stop. Even considered giving a statement here, that reaction was almost supernatural.” 

Tim winces, an audible moan slipping from his lips. “We swore to never speak of it again.” 

Sasha laughs, Tim giving her another playful glare from behind his tissues. “You swore that, I did no such thing.” 

Thankfully Martin doesn’t pry, having enough common sense to offer a polite chuckle, and offer some excuse about ‘planning’. Still, he can’t help himself from shooting a meek “I hope you feel better soon” over his shoulder, Tim giving him finger guns in return. 

“This is karma, you know,” Sasha calls after Martin’s outside earshot. “You took pleasure in Jon’s suffering, so now it’s your turn to suffer the same fate.” 

“No, thi- eTChhew! Scuse me,” Tim says, rubbing his nose with the tissue one last time before depositing it in his nearly overflowing trash can. Another tissue is plucked as his eyes begin to water, nostrils flaring with reckless abandon. Never just one. 

“kTChh’uew! hh’iTChh –uew! Tihhckles… eTCHh! etchh’uh! hiehh–” 

The last one toys with him, tracing the rims of his nostrils, back up his sinuses, a gentle itch that seems to burn against every inch of his nose. Finally, with a desperate gasp, Tim ducks into his wrist for the last, “heh’ATChhh –iew!” 

“Many blessings. Sounds like you need them,” Sasha offers with a wince, tossing another pack of tissues over, which Tim catches with a single hand, the other still gripping his nose. 

After taking a moment to clean himself up, Tim shoots her his signature smile, ignoring the eye roll she shoots back. “Where was I?” 

“Admitting this is karma?” 

“It’s not karma, it’s lack of common sense. Going to a party where a coworker is sick, and still drinking and eating the same meals” Tim says, aiming a rough cough into his sleeve. 

Sasha winces once more at the quality of the cough, hands rummaging through her drawers once more as she tosses a reply back. “And yet you’re the only one who caught it. Seems like karma to me.” 

Closing the distance between them in a single stride, Sasha places a hand on Tim’s shoulder, voice softening. “It’s two days till new years, why don’t you go home and try to get some rest? I doubt Martin will object, and I’ll cover for you with Jon.” 

Before Tim can form his rebuttal, Sasha places a box of paracetamol and a jar of vapor rub in front of him. Nodding his thanks, Tim lets out another harsh cough into his arm, leaning as far away from Sasha as he can manage. 

With a light rub to his shoulder, Sasha walks to the door, holding it open with a pointed look. “Go home, you sound awful.” 

“Alright, alright. I got the message. hH’ETchhiew!” Tim says, gathering his care package and beginning his walk down the hallway. 

“If I hear the rest of that fit happening in this building, I’m telling Martin how ill you really are,” Sasha calls after him, a smile flashing over her face as Tim holds up his hands in mock surrender, before ducking back into his arm with another muffled burst. 

— 

“You look horrible.” 

Tim manages a weary smile from behind the tightly wound scarf. “Thagk you.” 

Martin winces, standing in the doorframe, seemingly oblivious to the winter chill soaking into Tim’s bones. Even just the walk from the train station was hell on earth, standing out here is doing him no favours. 

Turning away with a throat scraping cough, Tim manages to clear the congestion enough to finish the sentence somewhat understandably. A great feat, given how fast his voice is retreating. “May I remind you that I’m only here because you insisted.” 

“Right, well I… I didn’t know how bad-” Martin begins, realizing spreading across his face like a wildfire as a chill leaves Tim breathless. “Oh god, I’m making you freeze to death while you’re already this sick, I’m so sorry, come in, I’ll go make you a tea.” 

Tim nods his thanks as he piles inside the warm institute, cursing his aching lungs as each breath of warm air seems to burn them from the inside out. Martin rushes away, nearly crashing into a few researchers as he makes his frantic dash for the kitchen. 

The scarf is reluctantly removed, a shudder running through Tim’s back as the warm air does nothing to soothe what he’s now certain is a growing fever. A few researchers wave to him, offering some idle chit-chat as he makes his way inside.

For the most part, people give him a wide berth, apparently he looks as bad as he feels. Tissues in hand, gripping them like a lifeline, Tim finds his way to a couch and lets himself sink into it. The party buzzes around him, fading into background noise. 

Martin returns soon after, the mug vibrating slightly as he attempts to steady his hand. “I wasn’t sure what kind you’d want, we have a pretty limited amount, but I have a few extras in my desk– oh I could have probably found one for colds and flus, I’m not sure which this is, I thought cold before but you look-” 

“Martin,” Tim interrupts, voice cutting uncomfortably through his raw throat. “Can I have the cup?” 

“Oh, right, sorry!” Martin says, a sheepish grin crossing his face, nerves more than anything else, as he hands Tim the mug. Tim gives another appreciative nod, taking a cautious sip. 

The warm liquid feels like heaven against his throat, and he barely manages to choke back a whimper. The flavour is still a mystery, Martin never actually got to that part. Given how little he can taste at the moment, seems it’s gonna remain that way. Still, the heat beginning to warm his chest is a welcome relief, and Tim has to fight to keep his eyes from drifting shut…

“Watch out!” 

The voice rouses him, his eyes snapping open just in time to witness Jon dropping to his knees in front of the couch. The realization doesn’t sink in for another minute, Tim blinking the tired from his eyes and trying to figure out why people are staring… and why there’s a hand on his finge– 

Oh, the tea. Thankfully Jon’s reflexes seemed to kick in just in time, his hands guiding Tim’s cup to the table next to him. Judgement clouds the boss's eyes as he turns back, fully ready to chastise Tim, no doubt. Jon opens his mouth, one hand beginning to point, but as his eyes scan Tim’s form, his demeanor changes instantly. 

“You don’t seem well.” Jon’s voice is still firm, but with a hint of something Tim can’t quite place. On anyone else, he’d call it concern. On Jon… perhaps concern isn’t far off, though the underlying criticism of the statement irritates him. 

“I wonder why that could be? It’s almost as if someone came to the Christmas party sick enough to fall asleep standing. Twice.” Tim says, sarcasm lining his words, alongside the congestion he can’t seem to fully shake. 

“Well in that case,” Sasha chimes in, cheerful voice a natural antithesis to the misery coursing through Tim’s system. “Seems you’re halfway there!” 

“Hey, I was lying down, that’s hardly the sahh… same thing– hH’ETchh!” 

“Here we go,” Sasha says, already turning on her heel to find a tissue box as Tim’s hitches increase in desperation. 

“aHTChh’ew! gn’tchhew!” 

“Bless,” Jon offers, a brief confusion crossing his face as Sasha laughs, shaking her head. 

“He’s not done,” She says, handing over the tissue box. 

Tim grabs for it blindly, too caught up in the fit to even attempt dignity. Still, the eyes on him do leave him with a hint of embarrassment, and the onslaught is muffled as best he can manage. “hH’MMpshhew! eMPFShh’ieh! hh’MFSHhueh!” 

Blessings sound out from the room, Tim managing to wave a hand towards the ones offering them, eyes still watering. As the fit seems to stall, he lowers his tissues, red nose now visibly twitching. 

“Are you alright?” Jon asks, the hint of concern from before now plainly evident. That’s frankly more alarming than it should be, and Tim finds himself wanting to… reassure the boss. 

“I’m okay, it’s juhh… j-just… huhh–” But it seems his nose has other plans, a tissue being raised once more as Tim paws at the appendage. “‘Scuhhse me, I still have… hahhve to… to… hiHh– eTCHh’ew! hk’ASCHh–oo!” 

This time the tickle fades with the final pitchy sneeze, Tim letting out a low groan as he mashes his nose into the ever growing collection of tissues he’s clutching. A few people call out final blessings, Sasha laughing out hers as Tim’s face goes red once more. 

Martin picks this time to enter the room with drinks, Tim letting his eyes flutter shut as the focus shifts off his misery. A gentle touch keeps him from drifting off to sleep, prying open an eye to find Sasha settling onto his left. 

“Careful, don’t want to catch this,” Tim manages, leaning against his right shoulder to muffle another stream of chesty coughs. Sasha winces as it goes on past the realm of comfort, her hand finding his back. 

“Don’t worry about me, I haven’t earned this cold, I didn’t make use of Jon’s or your suffering,” She says, the playful tone not masking the growing worry in her posture. 

While she can read him like a book, she’s no mystery to him either. The tension in her fingers, absentmindedly stroking patterns on his back. The way she subconsciously tries to support his body weight, despite them both sitting. The look in her eyes when he manages to stall the coughing long enough to meet them. 

With this brief respite from the attack, Sasha takes the chance to bring Tim’s tea back, his fingers wrapping around the warm mug. The first few sips burn, his lungs protesting, begging to return to their efforts to expel all the irritation. By the third, however, the warmth is spreading once more, easing the spasms. 

“Alright?” Sasha asks, beginning to stand from the couch. Tim nods his reply, taking another slow sip. “Think you’ll make it till midnight? We’ve still got a few hours to go.” 

He nods his approval again, not yet trusting his voice enough to make an attempt. Sasha simply smiles, easing back into the party that– Tim had almost forgotten existed. That fever must be worse than he thought, given how loud it is. A fact that’s now pounding against his head in harmony with his heartbeat. 

The party continues on, Sasha and Martin taking turns checking in on Tim as he slips rapidly in and out of consciousness. Seconds turn to hours, and before he knows it, it’s two minutes to midnight. 

As Tim blinks against the harsh fluorescent lighting, it’s Jon that stands before him, hand hovering near his side. Tim begins to speak, breaking off into a cough as his voice comes out rough with sleep and congestion. 

“What’s up boss?” He manages with the second attempt, not missing Jon’s wince at the nasal quality. 

“You simply look… well, the festivities are nearly over, I was just inquiring as to…” Jon seems to get stuck, eyes wandering down to the couch as he finishes. “I know you took the train here, I was seeing if you needed an escort home.” 

“How kind, I’d be delighted to have your accompaniment,” Tim responds, the wit clouding the fact he… hadn’t actually considered needing to go home. Jon seems to take this answer as satisfactory, ignoring all the sarcasm as he gives a tight nod and an out of practice smile. 

From across the room Martin calls out, something about a countdown. Tim attempts to pull himself to a stand, finding Sasha’s arm around his waist, guiding him to the wall. Leaning against it, he lets his rough voice join the chorus as they count into the new year. 

Despite how the lights and noise had pounded into his skull, everyone chanting in unison helps Tim realize that… there actually aren’t that many people here. Aside from his coworkers, there’s only a few researchers, and Elias is not in attendance.

Honestly, thank whatever cosmic being may exist for that one, he had been none too fond of Jon’s arriving sick. Tim shudders to think what he would have said about this state. He shouldn’t have come, but… something about how insistent Martin was… well he just couldn’t disappoint that loveable idiot. 

Somehow Tim finds he’s managed to keep up with the counting, despite being worlds away in his thoughts. As they approach the final numbers, a feathery sensation begins to spread through his nostrils- no. 

Absolutely not, this is not the time. It’s never just one, there’s not enough people here, someone’s gonna notice. And I mean, it’s not like he’s hiding the fact he feels like death, but… drawing that much attention is also not the goal. 

“Five! Four!”

“hiehh- h’ngTchh!” He manages to stifle the first, the congestion pounding in his head as the tickle seems to only get worse. 

“Three! Two!” 

“I cad’t– nNDtch! nGTCh’uh!” 

“One–” 

As the cheers begin to erupt, Tim ducks into the tissues with a scraping, “ehg’TCHhiew!” 

“Happy new years!” 

“yiEShh’iew! etchh’uh! hH’AESHH –oo!” Tim dips into his hands again, managing to sink down against the wall as he lets out a congested blow, ending the fit.

“What a way to ring in the new year,” Comes Sasha’s voice, her form blocking the light from Tim’s eyes as he looks up, fever blurring his vision.

“Shud ub.” 

“Christ Tim, you sound awful,” Jon adds, his form appearing behind Sasha’s. 

“Thagks boss,” Tim retorts, groaning as he notices a third form, Martin’s nervous fidgeting easy to spot even from this angle. Martin remains silent, though his eyes seem to hold more concern than any of them, and… guilt? Or maybe that’s just the delirium. 

Glancing up to meet Sasha’s gaze, Tim offers a weary, “Tibe to go hobe?” 

She nods softly, kneeling to help him to his feet, Martin wordlessly taking his other arm. Jon stands off to the side, hesitating. What for, who knows. All Tim can focus on is one step after the other, just gotta make it home, then he can sleep. For the rest of forever, at this rate. 

As they get to the door, Martin helps wrap the scarf around Tim’s neck, forcing him to lift it from its perch against Sasha’s shoulder. Sasha, for her part, supports his weight with ease, she was always stronger than she looked. 

Martin keeps casting glances towards Tim, obviously fretting over something. Too tired to manage his usual charm, Tim gives Martin the softest look he can manage. “Jusd say id, please. You’re makigg me nervous.”

“I’m so sorry I asked you to come, you’re obviously so unwell, and I know I didn’t really know that at the time, but I should have, or at least texted and checked in, I just… I wanted us all to get along so bad and I thought if you came it would mean more fun because you’re always so lively and good at talking to people and-” 

Tim holds up a hand, eyes glazing over as Martin stops short, breath coming almost as rapidly as Tim’s. After a minute goes by, Martin starts to open his mouth, seeming confused by the interruption, before nearly jumping out of his skin as Tim ducks into his fist. 

“eTCHh’ew! hH’YEAShh –iew! Sorry, I feld those cobigg… waid– hih’ETCHhew! heAYSHh’oo!” Tim ducks down again, Sasha grabbing him tighter to support the harsh shudders as he attempts to keep his balance. 

“Oh bless you,” Martin offers, voice coming out timid. Tim gives him, what he hopes is, a warm smile despite the fever taking hold of the last corners of his mind.

“If I didn’t wanna cobe, I would have stayed hobe. I dod’t blame you.” 

Martin nods silently, a relief seeming to flood his face. Taking his place once more supporting Tim, they move towards the exit. Opening the door, the first wave of cold floods the entryway, and a chill so violent runs through Tim that both Martin and Sasha take a step back to brace him. 

It’s now that Jon speaks up, voice strained with a type of worry Tim hadn’t heard before. “No, we’re absolutely not doing this, I refuse.” 

The trio turn towards him. Though perhaps a more accurate description is that Martin and Sasha turn, Tim simply goes along for the ride. Martin mumbles something about ‘no other choice’, but Sasha asks what Jon’s on about. 

“It’s too cold out there, it’s the middle of the damn night, there’s no way I’m letting him go home like this.” 

“And what do you suggest we do as an alternative? He can’t stay here-” Sasha begins, pausing as Jon turns towards her. 

“Why not? I’m the archivist, this is my archive,” Jon begins, pausing for a moment, before adding, “Well, Elias’s, but I hardly think he’d suggest we send an employee home in this weather while they’re this sick. That’s just bad management, he’ll freeze to death before even reaching the train.” 

As if to confirm this assumption, Tim shudders violently, ducking into his chest with a tired, “hh’eshhew! eTCHh’iew!” followed by a heavy sigh. Martin mumbles something about covering, but quickly silences himself as Tim begins to tremble again. 

Sasha gives Jon a look, seeming to read him for any hints of doubt, perhaps searching for an ulterior motive. After a brief pause, their eyes meeting, she gives a tight nod, approval of some kind. 

“Come on Martin, let’s get him back to that couch, he can sleep there for the night,” Sasha directs, Martin nodding his acceptance. 

Tim manages to catch snippets of the conversation as they get him settled. Jon fetching him a blanket he keeps in his office. Martin providing some more tea. Sasha grabbing tissues and medication for when he wakes up. Something about Jon sleeping in his office so he’s not alone, and Sasha coming in early to help him home. 

With his final bout of consciousness, Tim holds up a hand, the conversation immediately pausing. “Thagk you guys. And… esSHhh’ew! And, I’b sorry.” 

All three stare at him for a minute, before Sasha breaks first. Her laughter fills the silence, Martin joining in soon after, and even Jon letting a few chuckles slip out. When they’ve finally collected themselves, Sasha gives Tim a warm smile. 

“Sleep well, Tim. I’ll come fetch you in the morning.” 

With a content sigh, Tim lets his eyes drift shut again, his consciousness fading to the soft hum of his friends in the background. 

Alright, so maybe coddling isn’t quite so bad after all.

[lilac-vode]

hey! this is a long shot but seeing as i have some ppl following here, i wanted to ask if anyone at all has links to mental health resources that could be helpful for repulsed aroace ppl constantly struggling with feelings of alienation. or like, any mental health resources at all geared toward aroace ppl!! there is just. not that much out there for us and i don't have a place to start trying to make my brain less miserable. i would appreciate so much if anyone is familiar with stuff like this that they could share

[dozzlegramcracker]

WHY ARE GOOD GAMES MADE BY BAD PEOPLE

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

*starts getting violent*

[snekdood]

ig my biggest issue with fandoms is the almost... false closeness thats there in them? ig since i was a kid and wasnt good at enforcing boundaries and was just excited to find ppl with the same interest I didn't really think about it but be real like, there was a vibe that it was "okay" and "fine" to expose a lot about ourselves to eachother that... i think if we knew eachother irl... we'd hafta be a lot closer than that to see or hear about that stuff...

[confusedsiewmai]

I think.

It's a bit telling if I get furry porn on my twt timeline...

[k0yaz]

(I don't do requests often, so I read your rules like three times out of nervousness 😭)

Could you write an Il Capitano x fem!reader where the reader is forced to walk home by her family after a ball. While walking back, Capitano picks her up and offers to take the reader to where she lives. Maybe toss in some soft/kind Capitano?

Thank you so much, I hope this is an ok request!

pitch black.

Pairings: capitano x fem!reader

CW: sfw, female reader, assy family members, written before natlan, so capitano might be slightly ooc, can be read as platonic or romantic, yum frostbite yay, ngl id cry myself to sleep if I was in snezhnaya bc I can’t handle cold weather, probably an iron deficiency, lazy writing at the end again AUUUUGHHHH, freakytano my glorious king, not proofread.

A/N: HIHIHIHI ALSO IM SORRY IF I MISREAD THE FAMILY THING BUTTTT I ACTUALLY WROTE ON A WEEKDAY YAY also guys should I do like a special for 1k cause my followers are eating rn ok but seriously thank u so much for all the support love yall!! 🕯️

Cold swishes of air circled the pitch black sky faintly illuminated by a star or two, ruffling the silky fluff of a heavy coat adorning your figure. You firmly tightened your grasp around the lapels of the large coat, fabric wrinkling and dragged between the clutches of your paling knuckles tinted a soft pink from Snezhnaya’s biting cold.

Hollow crunches of your footsteps simply rang aloud in your years as your father’s words piled up in your mind. They were merely harmless, yet the intent behind your family’s dismissal stung like a sharpened blade spearing into your chest. But of course, it wasn’t anything new. A gust of wind howled into the canal of your ear sharply, ringing the ill memory of your family spitting the venom laced words of ordering you to trudge home in the nation’s burrowing winter. They didn’t even bother to provide a coat or furnish your body in any way, simply shooing you off as if they were desperate to make you keep your distance from them.

You had been awkwardly situated next to them, the chatter making you shift uncomfortably in an off putting stance, similar to that of an upright statue. Their exasperating laughs bellowed throughout the ballroom obnoxiously, catching an occasional glance of a person or two eyeing them. If hunching your shoulders in embarrassment wasn’t enough, their attitude was more than enough for you to have a strong urge to pray for the Tsaritsa’s wrath to be bestowed upon them.

People had noticed your huddled stance, tracing the rim of your glass in circular motions in hopes to distract yourself from the growing oddity of your placement in the ball. And without hesitation, they would of course begin to approach you. Possibly out of pity? Perhaps even the goodness of their heart wanting to accompany the girl who wasn’t very engaged in the celebration. Each person would approach you, friendly smiles stretching their face as they’d attempt to greet you—only for it to be cut short by your parents’ attention snapping to the guest stood before you, slicing the conversation short as they’d beckon the person to come speak with them instead.

Tremors of disdain pooled inside of you upon seeing your family members so obviously attempt to shove out any possible chance of a trail of hopeful socialization paved on your direction. Your isolation only grew more and more frustrating as indistinct chatter bounced off the walls of the ball, your eyes following the sound of the echo trailing from the marble structure to the intricate chandelier and candles flickering. At this moment, you purely felt alone. Isolated from everything as you mentally stood still in a pitch black void, with drowned out voices clouding the lonesome darkness.

“(Name). I think it’s about time you headed home.” Your father rasped out, not even making eye contact with you as his gaze was locked onto the champagne bottle and glass snug between his hands. “The ball is over anyway. We’re only staying for extra drinks. Your mother and I will be out meeting some other relatives at the nearby restaurant.”

“Father, it’s too cold for me to walk back home. You know how-“

“Oh, (Name). You’ll be fine. I raised you to be an independent woman. You’ll find the way home just fine.”

Pushing past your father, your mother pokes her shoulder out as well, casting you a glance as she chimes in to the conversation.

“He’s right, dear. Go ahead and head home for the night. I trust you’ll fare just fine without us accompanying you home.”

“Mother, that’s not what I-“

“(Name). That’s enough. You should head home. End of discussion.”

You knew you couldn’t properly explain to them. They’d always toss you aside and swat off your remarks as such. You bit back your protest, swallowing as you scanned the ballroom for a spare coat anywhere. There were a few harbingers around, so a raggedy stray coat shouldn’t be too uncommon.

“Sorry. I’ll be heading home now.” You submitted under your breath, masking your mixed irritation dissolved into your tone. You only further grimaced slightly as your mother smiled and leaned over to place a faux affectionate kiss to your forehead. With one dismissive wave once more, her and your father turned their back to you to exit the ball, shouldering through the heavy spruce doors packed with people crowding them.

You blinked, fervent shivers making you tremble against each flake of snow that brushed along the exposed parts of your skin as you realized you had just stepped midway through. The searing cold made your head spin as you began to lose yourself, frostbite clouding your senses and enveloping the tips of your fingers slowly. No matter. You could make it home if you simply stopped spacing out and thinking about your shitty parents. Just then, a loud crunch resounded with the howling wind, heavy clanks of metal being heard in addition to the crunches.

The heavy thuds only seemed to become clearer as they grew closer and closer, a light drag of chains shuffling behind you as well. Your heart nearly pounded out of your chest in anticipation, a sense of apprehension overtaking you as you clutched the coat draped over you tighter in a pathetic attempt to shield yourself using the thick fabrics. The thuds came to a halt as your eyes slowly roamed over the man who halted before you. His figure loomed over you, as his towering frame was quite intimidating to the least.

The metal lining of his mask enshrouded his face in a sightless black, cloaking his face completely as it seemed like an empty void bore into the gap of his helmet. Streams of jet black hair along with that adorned along the cheekbone of his mask and down his shoulders, a few stray strands of his long hair edged along the sharp steel edges of his mask. On top of that. A thick white coat with black fluff was draped along his shoulders, the small fabric emblem in the corner pertaining to that of the Fatui. If he was wearing this coat, your best bet was he was definitely a Fatui harbinger. Likely a strong one at that.

Backing up slightly, your eyes wandered over the man’s figure as you stood neatly frozen in place, the wind swaying his streaming hair while the harbinger looked down upon you.

“Is something the matter, ma’am?”

His low voice cast the illusion of protruding through the thickened frozen air, a faint muffle present in his speech considering he had spoken through the hollow opening of his seemingly endless mask.

“I was just walking home..”

“You seemed to be troubled, though.”

You simply wanted to scoff, yet you only tilted your head away from the harbinger in shame. Had your family humiliated you this much to the point where a figure of such high status took pity on you?

Sucking in a breath, you slowly turned your head back towards him, his body frozen in place, and looking down at you like a great statue. His gaze remained locked on you—yet you couldn’t tell due to the hollow blackness pitched into the carving of his mask. “Your name?” He hummed lowly, his body still enveloped by his large coat, and arms hidden under the sides of the thick pale silk.

“(Name).” You replied bluntly, clearing your throat and lowering your voice almost immediately after as to not give a rude impression. “Yours?”

“Il Capitano.”

Capitano seemed to follow your lingering gaze as he spoke, tracing each spot your eyes transfixed on periodically. However, there was one particular spot you couldn’t take your eyes off, and he didn’t take long to notice you focused on the Fatui emblem at the corner of his harbinger coat. “First of the Fatui harbingers.” He added, sensing that you had been wondering his relation to the infamous organization serving under the Cryo Archon dispersed across Teyvat.

Sensing your evident shifts and subtle kicks of your feet, he didn’t take long to pick up on your troubled state fidgeting before him, as if you were afraid of a train of emotional danger clouding your judgement to even think properly—much less walk in such bitter conditions.

“Where are you off to so late, miss (Name)?”

“I’m just walking home…it’s important family business.”

You immediately added that last part as an audible afterthought, not wanting to involve a harbinger in your personal affairs. Capitano wasn’t stupid, however. The clouds of tension and fear were palpable amidst the indifferent expression of yours, flaked white from the occasional crystals of snow fluttering onto your face. Heavy clanks followed your words as he stepped forward carefully, not wanting to startle you as he made his way directly beside you.

The black fur lining the neckline of his coat brushed against your collarbone as he stood closely shoulder to shoulder with you, head kept high. He continued to stare off into the distance ahead of him, as if the burrowing fog wasn’t enshrouding the entire vicinity before the two of you and dimming your line of sight.

“Do you mind if I accompany you home?”

You blinked out of pure surprise. A harbinger? Walking you home? At first it was too much, you couldn’t possibly accept this, much less waste his time like this! However the chilling thought of walking alone at night so late sent a shiver down your spine, and it was definitely not just from the cold.

“Not at all, Sir Capitano.”

He shook his head, stepping forward as he beckoned you to catch up to him.

“No need for formalities. Just Capitano is fine.”

Nodding, you briskly walked beside him to match his pace. The two of you were purely silent as he walked into the swirls of fog patterned along the vicinity clouding the array of homes lined up on either side of the street. Shuffles of chains and howls of wind were the only noticeable sound echoing along the empty night roads, inducing a rush of calmness that replaced your previous anxious state. Halfway through, you proceeded to extend your arm out, pointer finger fixing ahead of you at a slight angle.

“My home should be around there.”

Capitano simply nodded, shifting his path in the direction of your finger’s aim as he slowly headed toward the squeezed space of homes cluttered along the sides. Once reaching your doorstep, he halted at the hardened spruce topped with a silver knocker situated above the center, as if he was awaiting your next words. You delivered him a sincere and thoughtful smile, folding your arms as you didn’t know what exactly to do with them. The freezing steel of the knocker uncomfortably brushed along the exposed skin of your shoulder, which was not effectively covered by the ragged coat, making you hunch over upon contact embarrassingly.

“Thank you, Capitano. I don’t think I could have reached home quick enough before passing out on the streets..”

He let out an affirmative hum once more, looking down at you through his helmet framed by his long hair which was now a bit unkempt from the winds mixed with the fog. But it was only a strand or two off anyway.

“The pleasure is all mine, Miss (Name).” He paused briefly, before adding once more. “If you’re in any trouble that requires my assistance, don’t feel afraid to call me.” His words were sweet, yet they made you laugh faintly, making you biting your tongue at his low tone questioning what was so humorous about his statement.

“Ah. It’s nothing, Capitano. It’s just…we met under a few hours ago..”

“It’s not the time we knew each other that’s the matter. Rather, it’s the fact that it’s obvious you’re clearly going through something, (Name). I don’t mean to pry, I just want to do what is just for you. And I can tell you’re a good person.”

His words only brought that faint elated smile back onto your face, an unexplainable disappointment drooping within you when he steps away from the door to head back. You wave to him, and he gives a quick nod, turning his back to you and heading back to god knows where. That smile remained on your lips for quite a bit, even when you rocked open the door slowly into the comfort and warmth of your home.

What a respectable and kind man.

A/N: it’s 1 am and I have a quiz tomorrow morning LOLLL

Anyway I’m so happy I got this done yay

[kosmicdream]

oh now i want to know why you hate one piece (just so you know where im coming from, i used to hate the series and thought was the stupidest thing ever and there was no way it was good, and then i read it and it was amazing and i loved it and it moved me in profound ways, and yet i did not forget why i thought it was stupid and indeed i can still fully see why someone would think it is stupid because, lets be honest, it is kind of really stupid so) yeah, im curious

i once loved it as a late teen, i even had one piece ocs LOL. One Piece is not bad because its stupid, or has toony art style or w/e .. but it is bad because its betrayed all the characters and core principles of the story that it pretended to be so invested in. in so many ways its honestly impressive. While i don't agree w/ everything said - youtuber Drizzt has made a very long mutli-series video essays about the various issues and i have enjoyed watching them as it covers arcs that i could not force myself to read. I personally kept reading to the mermaid island arc, but emotionally i dont think it was good when they reached the grand line. (laboon stuff was cute, but after that.. trouble) i dont really like alabasta arc and i feel like every arc after that, is just trying to do that arc again but worse every time. (all complete w/ a new princess character to be tossed aside for the next round..) i hated robins backstory and her part in water 7 (she was my fav female character in the series & i loved her powers.) i wanted usopp to leave the crew or have some real consequences w/ him and the ship. i hate luffy being like such a chosen one in so many ways he has 0 agency in the story, there's some to be expected but now its like at the point where i dont even know what else you could add. he really is the nepo baby of the one piece world. no one dies EVER and i dont even count ace dying bc who gives a fuck abt ace, luffy sure doesnt cuz he got over it in like 1 chapter after he died w and now he has a new retcon brother (who also was dead at least once i think and had amnesia) to fill in the void. franky is ugly as shit now. i could go ON.

[cuttlefishen]

I don't post much on tumblr anymore but it's 2am and I'm finally in a safe space with power and water and internet and I feel fucking AWFUL about it. So I'm gonna yell into this void.

I don't quite understand why I feel like such a fucker. It's a little bit of guilt and a little bit of nothing feeling real. Probably a bit of hopelessness and fear too even if I'm out. My home wasn't even hit bad. My stuff is safe (besides the fridge full of food I had to toss). My friends are alive (if fucked out of water for potentially weeks and power for at least days). But the other side of town is fucked. The surrounding communities are fucked. And who knows how desperately long it's going to take to rebuild or even clear out the damage.

I just feel bad. Like I should be in there suffering still too because I abandoned my neighbors and friends and that's stupid. That's a stupid thought. If I can get out and not burden the system more? That's good. My neighborhood is rallying to help the people who can't even get across town. I gave away the water i stood in line 4 hours for. I gave away almost all of my dry goods. I gave my friends money for whenever they can get out too.

But here i am feeling guilty about being able to play fucking fallout finally. Feeling guilty about how one of my bigger concerns right now is how im going to finish my student teaching licensure because i didnt get to record myself yet. Im stressing about not being able to register to vote before the deadlines because buncombe county sure as fuck aint gonna be processing that shit anytime soon. Im stressing about the packages i was supposed to have delivered and where they might be and if fucking hot topic is going to take back my order because i cant get to the closed mall to pick it up. Its stupid. Its all so stupid and selfish and i feel like such fucking garbage to be stressed about these things when people have lost everything. Lost family.

I don't know. I'm just trying to process trauma and not doing it well i guess. I've felt weirdly compelled to record all of my experience over the last 5 days, so I have a few hours worth of video and audio recordings. A lot of it was of the radio broadcasts which were our only way to get literally any information. Anyway have some photos.

[kairoseas]

I post a lot of headcanons and aus stuff but truth is, I'm a roleplayer at heart. Written via Skype, MSN, even had this weird set-up where someone doodled out their reply in art and I chose to type mine out in word format. Since I have a wealth of free time, I was gonna put forth this offer to start roleplaying in private servers on Discord! Firm on fiction =/= reality . Can write anything from short paragraphs to multi-paragraph responses as I'm often on my laptop. 21+ preferable since I'm 21+ myself; I do tend to delve into heavy topics because I find horror enjoyable. CNC, NSFW, all fine! I don't mind! I tend to toss an idea out to my writing partner when I get it and see where it leads, generally. Blood, gore, SH, sexual content, all perfectly fine since I have no triggers myself, and I have a rather versatile roster of characters! I've written: (JJK, up to date) Ryomen Sukuna, Yuuji Itadori, Megumi Fushiguro, Satoru Gojo, Suguru Geto, Yuta Okkotsu... (the list continues!) I also like to become friends outside of the roleplay, so my interests are gaming, manga, writing, and learning/studying. I tend to lean heavily into tropes and plots inspired by content like Silent Hill, Resident Evil, Higurashi, Death Note, Fatal Frame, Elfen Lied, Persona, and more. I like getting into themes and the psychological aspect as well as the general aspects. I'm a nerd at heart, what can I say? I also like creating little channels in discord where we can share fanarts and other things with each other! Mutishipper to the core! ( Tend to lean more into: itafushi/fushiita, sugusato/satosugu, sukufushi/fushisuku, gosuku/sukugo, always open to trying something new though! ) And I also dabble in aus, of course: like Reincarnation plots, ABO, Yandere content... but tend to shy away from OCs. Though, In NSFW regard, I lean into writing bottoms bc I'm not confident in writing tops quite yet... And I'm up at all hours, almost. Typically a bad sleep schedule so timezones aren't an issue, especially if we really click! I'm also completely caught up with the anime & the manga together so no need to worry about spoilers. You can even look around on this blog and see if you like my stuff and think our characters will get along! Just throwing this out there into the void to see if anyone's interested in starting something with me! Let's build a world! Contact via the Tumblr IMs for my Discord name or by liking!

[narwhalandchill]

(soo ignition teaser thoughts ig)

hmmmm im ngl the trailer itself as a like prelude to what is coming in 5.0 intrigue and plot wise is like. compared to the region teasers that came before w lazzo and overture. its just. its kinda bad im sorry KWKJKWDJKWDJK like okay cool seeing the new cast and production value is high as always (+ music) but its such a middling teaser for the story itself?? it feels like a powerpoint presentation of the cast more than anything narratively coherent with an inherent draw and mystery

like theres mavuika speaking to the flame thingy (xbalanque that u? "one entombed in the primal fire" perhaps????) with some intrigue i suppose as well as her brief thing w capitano. ororon also appearing to be working together or aligned with capitano given theyre standing together there which could make for an interesting plot thread but beyond that its very.... eh. its not giving us a lot to grip onto ya know???? and thats rly a shame especially since i also felt that way abt the teaser in the 4.8 livestream. i wish we got more

and sure theres a tournament wahoo but like. its really Not helping to hype up that thing when half the introduced cast isnt being like "OMG the tournament!!!!1!1 this is HUGE!!!1" (or even. "oh no this is BAD!!!1" to set up basic conflict. like why would they dread it?) but instead just. "oh right... the tournament 🙄🙄" like who thought that was a good idea 😭😭 if the PEOPLE of natlan dgaf abt the big plot event happening then how am i as the viewer supposed to feel majorly invested in it . wow theyre tossing a ball around . wow nobody wants it guess ur tournament is having a bit of a PR issue in the making mavuika lmao

anyway i wouldnt even call myself a true capitano glazer despite being a fatuiHQ enjoyer on the side but like. that hmph still carried welcome capHIMpeaktano truly o7 JWDJWDJKDWJK also did yall see the. anemo-ish turquoise flare when mavuika is confronting (?) him? wonder if thats a thing with her flames or is it implying cap as anemo or sth.... i think itd fit him decent enough but ya. looking forward to HIM for sure

(+ congrats to him for losing the goofy timbs from arles animated short lmao like his design looks so fucking sick now)

character design wise uhhhh. well theres the obvious huge fucking issue here and while id say that hoyo p much already showed their true colors on the matter with sumeru that doesnt rly. make it any less disappointing and egregious wrt all the cultures and peoples theyre So willing to gather inspiration from in all possible aspects Other than the diversity of the people themselves. like its just... bad and such a shame but also not very surprising unfortunately.

(and really it just. looks especially bad given they clearly Can put melanin on people its just... enemy mobs only.)

beyond that i kind of dont have anyone that super catches my eye rn??? mainly because . well leaks moment eek but its basically official info now so basically. xilonens existence as a geo and a 5* (which like . u dont need leaks to guess she will be im sorry jdwjdw) was leaked a bit ago as well as the patch she should appear meaning. im actually in chiori rerun savings mode since its very high chance that she will be back w xilonen if anyone. so thats my plan for now kjdwjkdwjkdwjk

in terms of the actual cast i do like kinich and ororons designs v much, the design motifs of the latter especially are interesting bc those eye-like patterns are almost giving quantum symbol (= black hole imagery) to me???? and thats V interesting especially if hes actually working w capitano and the fatui. now him being a cat boy or whatever animals ears those turn out to be isnt like sth thats huge for Me personally but i do think hes valid and also W for anyone whos into that, congrats guys im happy for u ! but like fr itd be such an insane twist if hoyos Finally introducing the void quantum abyss whatever element w him (and maybe cap too.) bc that symbol Rly is looking Curious. or then hes just electro lol. for kinich its like. yeah fair he might be xiao-tighnari-gaming from minecraft ill admit that but. i do like the color scheme and his outfit a lot JKWJKDJKDWJKD so like i forgive it

w the girlies i overall find them all like. quite nice but so far without any personality + lore known its hard to settle my complete thoughts on them just yet. tho citlali being pink is super refreshing for genshin since we do have a shocking absence of it so like shes definitely one im drawn to, chasca looks interesting and like she could play a bigger part plot wise (maybe?) so that might be neat. both her and citlali being cryo is kinda surprising?? but cool. maybe ill get to unbench my shenhe and play some cryo teams again lmao freeze has been dead in abyss for so long now....

xilonen again w the kemomimi isnt sth im particularly into or not into but she looks cool, depending on personality and how her kit synergies turn out (+ assuming the chiori rerun, the fate of those pulls too), i might try for her as well? theres an Energy to her i like it. if she has proper Attitude and flair thats gonna be a massive bonus for me

mualani i think is rather bland to me, sth about her outfit and design just doesnt click for me even if the shark thing from the teaser before is neat and everything. the chibis are never sth im actively drawn to but like both do look okay, im kinda hoping kachina could be a lynette moment for 5.x and end up a free 4* since her exploration roomba looks p fun

anyway then theres. mavuika and i. well at least the design wasnt. That concept art one (ThoseWhoKnow...) . so instant massive W improvement solely on that basis holy fucking shit but ehhhhh im sorry i still dont know how to feel abt the very modern like. biker bodysuit thingy. im not a huge fan of the bodysuit type designs anyway so its not that surprising but still. her eyes + hair is absolutely stunning tho like not a question at all.

tbh in a way i kinda feel like having too many Thoughts on her design is kinda just unnecessary bc like. shes the archon. of Course the kit is going to be insane so i will get her anyway (UNLESS a pyro onfielder JKWJKJKWJKWJKWFKJ like god please no). and in terms of like is her design and energy from what this vid is giving us good enough that i wont like. Actively resent having to get her for meta and strong teams??? Absolutely. so in that sense ig its all cool lmao

but yeah. idk i just think as a teaser for the upcoming story its rly a shame how weak this felt for me???? like sure overture ended up being a bit of a misleading teaser since it gave the impression of arle as this mastermind of the fontaine AQ which didnt rly happen but it still served as a source of hype and intrigue. and yes lazzo is sth that can Never rly be beat in terms of how out of nowhere it was and how fucking insane the whole harbinger reveal went (+ elogia cinerosa existing) for lore and long term hype but its just. unfortunately those 2 are the regional teasers this natlan one is supposedly meant to parallel and it just didnt deliver anything comparable to those for me

like still looking forward to natlan and seeing the rest of its cast (like im fairly convinced the flame thingy might be xbalanque and hes gonna be a big deal ultimately or sth) and where it goes and all its environments but this trailer didnt rly. grip me the way i wouldve expected it to. which is unfortunate kdjkdwjkwjkdwj but yea thats all

[bluegekk0]

i think you're so awesome because you made pk so cute and skrunkly and hes awesome... but canon pk made a bunch of children and dumped them into the literal abyss

aw, thank you! im happy to hear that you think so

and, well. that whole thing is still part of fpk's story, i didn't just forget about it (and neither did he). it's just a bit more nuanced than how the general fanon portrays it as. the vessels hatched from within the abyss and climbed out, he didn't toss them back in if they were impure like a lot of the memes and fandom jokes would make you think. having to see them hatch, which many of them did not survive in the first place, and then watching so many of them slipp during their climb and fall to their deaths, it permanently broke something in him, even if at that point he kept telling himself that they were simply void beings, and that void did not feel pain. not that it excuses what he did, but if he had a choice, or was aware of their true nature, he would've never put them through it. he thinks of himself as a monster for what he's done, and some would agree, but to me he was a broken man, desperate to save the kingdom he's sworn to protect, left with no other option but the one he, at the time, thought wasn't as cruel as it ultimately ended up being

as a side ramble, i find it quite annoying how much people simplify what happened and even spread straight up misinformation. there's nothing in the game that suggests he himself threw the impure vessels back into the abyss, all we know is that he was standing at the top and waiting for the first one to make the climb, and yet people take that as fact and make memes and jokes about it, spreading it even further. i'm not saying he did nothing wrong, of course what he did was cruel, but whenever people say "he tossed his kids into the abyss", they always skip the part that explains what actually drove him to it. he didn't do it for fun, he was desperate and was left with no other choice. you may still hate him for it, that's subjective, but leaving that part out fundamentally simplifies what's a really interesting moral dilemma that makes his character so engaging. all for the sake of "haha fork man murders kids" jokes. it's really frustrating and makes me avoid talking about pk outside of the fpk au context. and every time people make those jokes about fpk i get more upset than i'd like (which, as a heads up, doesn't apply to you, since you did make a distinction between him and canon pk, so don't worry about that)

sorry about the rant, i just had to get it out of my system cause it always frustrates me. it's one of those things that makes me want to distance myself from the rest of the fandom, on top of already feeling a little alienated with some of my headcanons about the characters. the jokes were a bit funny at first, but it sucks to see such an interesting character dumbed down to a william afton-esque caricature

[catboymoments]

hey this is probably super weird to toss into the void to a stranger but i recently rediscovered you after i like, really admired your art style/og post-canon bnha au…quite a few years ago.

tl;dr i recently got back into the series, reiginiting my curiosity into my own next gen au — and then i remembered you and your au and just…frantically googled to make sure you weren’t a figment of my imagination from middle/high school (and i wasnt on tumblr until years afterwards lmao)

and yk im in ur inbox because you werent 🫣

all that to say, i guess a massive (belated) thank you for creating? thank you for sharing your art and headcanons into the world? bc i found you at a time where i was really doubting my skills as a creator and finding someone around my age who was really confident in their own work was pretty damn cool. i just…really loved the way you handled the universe and the characters. yours remain my favorite interpretation. even if ur not rlly into the fandom today, i still found myself poring over your more recent art, esp for toh. youve improved n changed and thats pretty damn cool of you.

so i guess thanks? and keep on keeping on :)

AUAUAUAUUAUAUUAUA WHAT!! THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! YOURE GONNA MAKE ME CRY DUDE

[droppingartintotheinfinite]

little fic/poem thingy i did about dave and bro

-

TG: i keep thinking about you

TG: its stupid i know

TG: youd call me stupid over it too

TG: sneer or sigh or some shit so id know how goddamn disappointing i am to you your would be knight raised and trained to be a hero given every opportunity to live up to you and endlessly fucking it up failing at it harder than i probably wouldve at school if you let me go to one

TG: but you gave me so much shit its all piled up in my head a big ol mountain of fecal matter flies buzzing around it and that many flies are fucking loud ok i can barely fucking hear myself think in here

TG: and i gotta get it all out somehow and tossing it into the infinite void of your goddamn inbox like yesterdays garbage or me in a spar with you when theres stairs nearby seems about as likely to work as any other thing

TG: so

TG: i think

TG: actually

TG: fuck this is hard

TG: i

TG: i kind of hate you sometimes, bro

TG: and i

TG: god

TG: fuck it you know what

TG: here ill ironically rap it

TG: i coulda been a poet man

TG: i coulda been a star

TG: and instead here we are here i stand the last will and testament of a dead fucked up broken little man

TG: you musta thought you were god cuz you put me up on the cross

TG: every damn day but im not jesus im just bleeding freely from these fucking holes you cut into my palms

TG: or maybe you thought he was god or it was just a semi ironic nod to a mythos you knew was wrong or it was just your note to play in sburbs shit song

TG: damn thing went on and on

TG: the chorus was my death or maybe that was the melody and the chorus was my endless panting breaths a medley of exhaustion left me huffing puffing never able to catch my breath never able to find a fucking end to that heady rush of deadly bloodshed dripping steady

TG: was it your will or his will that led in letting my blood spill bloodletting red spilling all over the floor hands blistered raw desperately gripping onto that fucking sword

TG: holding tight like it was a lifeline like i was ever gonna win a fight against you like if i just tried harder cried harder id somehow come out fine like being a hero of time ever meant anything but a shitty corpseparty conga line

TG: like i didnt wonder some days if youd give a fuck if i fucking died

TG: and god bro i didnt hate you for the crime of making me john technically created me but youre the one who brick by brick laid out the shape of me cut me like a gemstone to get the grade of me

TG: always a failing grade never a pass maybe you always knew id be a failure at this class for all it was supposedly made for me maybe they all knew and i was the last to understand that my dumb ass never woulda had a chance

TG: sorry if im being a little crass but i learned it from you because you taught me everything i knew and everything i know too i know im too much of a screwup failout dropout loser to live up to you

TG: thats the lesson you taught me best the message you drilled again and again into my head and its the one that sticks with me now youre dead and gone all these texts left unread whether theyre sitting in your inbox or bouncing around in my head

TG: youre a hero and im a pawn and maybe im wrong but that seems a little fucked up a little messed up kind of a not great thing to tell your son

TG: and it took me so goddamn long to understand that

TG: for the truth to dawn on me that it wasn’t wrong of me not to wanna play along to the song he wrote for me the one thats broken me the one you sung for him so loyally all along

TG: did you want the best for me when you took a sword to the chest for me or was that just another test for me you faced down death for me and lost and sometimes i wonder if you loved the rest of me or any of me and all this thinkings gonna be the death of me but i cant stop

TG: i feel like im gonna pop all these thoughts bouncing round and round my head like rubber fucking balls and they call me a god but im just a shitty kid in shitty pajamas and what are the odds ive ever earned a nod like that applause like that a cause like that and god, bro

TG: it was fucked up

TG: what you did to me was fucked up

TG: you arent even a real ghost but yours wont fucking leave me alone no matter how many times i tell myself youre gone

[littlekittenfairychubbybunny]

Princess of Hawkins, ST x gyaru!Reader

honestly idek what im doing, its unfinsihed but i spent too much time on it to toss it away, give me compliments or something so i can continue. this is just one FAT big insert like literally this girl is revolving sround me, she’ll go by y/n and will be written with no specific skin color, but she will have blonde hair and will be really short (im sorry my precious tall girls, ilysm but i cant) as well as there will be usage of tagalog (filipino language) but oh well, theres going to be translations at the bottom, im not gonna make this character a mary sue but i will make her a lover girl and most characters if not all will love her platonic and or romantic so it wont be just billy that wants her. some ideas are just random bc i wanna write her to be just like me, i age regress, and stuff so that will be incorporated or wtv

It was 2 am when we got to the new house. My dad unlocked it and me, my step mom and step sister head inside. We looked around a bit and it wasn't the best, but it wasn’t the worst. Although the neighborhood doesn’t seem as homely as my old one, I’ll get used to it at some point. Not like I have a choice anyways. My dad walks into the house and sets down most of our carry-on bags and suitcases. He sighs contently and looks at our house proudly,

“Looks nice! Right Nak?” He says with a proud smile 

I grab my backpack that I brought in, looking for my slippers, I find them and take off my shoes to put on my inside slippers. I get back up and smile. I look around the empty voids of rooms and space “Yeah, It is. So much space too! Definitely an upgrade from our apartment!” I say with a smile, running around what will be our living room. I look around some more, looking at the kitchen and the bathroom. My dad leaves to bring in more of our belongings as I grab my things and head upstairs. Unsure of what room will be mine, I set my things down in the hallway and look around. There were 3 rooms. A master, a normal and, what the previous owner had said, an office. I go back out to the hallway and grab my things, putting them down in the room that was adjacent to the bathroom. I look around the room once more, envisioning where my bed and other furnishings will go. 

I squeal excitedly as I look out the window to the uhaul truck pulling into my street. I hurriedly went downstairs almost tripping and falling but catching myself at the last moment. I kick off my inside slippers and slip back on my outside shoes, bouncing excitedly anticipating the truck, I run around my dad in circles. He tells me to calm down as the truck pulls up and the guy hops out. He waves to me and my dad, as another man comes out, who also waves. My dad greets them and they start talking while they open the truck. I look at the truck with stars in my eyes and squeal as it fully opens. I see the boxes that were labeled with my name and shake my dad to get them for me. He pushes me off and tells me to wait with an eye roll. I pout and wait IMpatiently if I do say so myself, as they bring out boxes one by one or two by two I see that mine are now being brought out. I jump up and grab one that was light enough for me to carry, I bring it upstairs to my now claimed room and set it down in the corner where all my boxes will go for now. 

I go back down to grab the rest but leave the heavier ones for the workers and dad. I wait for them to bring the boxes inside and as they do they start asking where each of them go. My dad tells them where and while this continues I wait upstairs in my room. I lay down on the floor and whip out my phone, opening instagram and posting my new room on my story. 

(the room size is a bit bigger and the wallpaper is different, floral type) I smile and sigh contently as I hear my dad yell out my name. (ik instagram doesn’t have the black bar thingy for stories but shh I wish it did) 

“Y/N come down and take a picture!” I huff and sit up, feeling a little dizzy afterwards, I get up, now feeling even more dizzy, I stumble out of my room and down the stairs. I see my step mom and step sister huddling in the living room arranging the boxes. My dad calls me over and tells me to take a picture of him and them. I agree and take his camera, they pose and I give him back his camera. After a quick look he puts his camera down and says “I’ll get the guys to bring your furniture up okay?” I nod and go up, I hear my dad and them talk as they start going up the stairs. My dad yells out my name asking me where I was.

“I’m in here!” I yell out. The moving guys come in and bring my bed and I tell them where to set it down, adjacent to the window, so if I wanna get up and look out the window I can. I clap happily and it hits 7 am as dad tells me to get out the house and take my sister over to Hawkins high and middle school. I sigh and agree as I head downstairs to retrieve her, I grab my keys, our documents, my bag and head out. I pull out the map dad handed me and look for Hawkins High and Middle School to find directions and start heading our way there. 

this is what ur wearing btw bc i said so with a backpack that matches the fit

After 20 long minutes me and my sister finally got to the parking lot and we headed inside of the school. I look around the school confused and we start aimlessly walking around. It hits 8 when the students start coming in one by one, and that’s when I panic. First of all I’m not dressed crazy, but I’m dressed not typically normal, but whatevs! In my pink princess dress and crown I rule. I see this guy with the beautiful hair I’ve seen on a man, it was swooped in all the right angles and it was angelic. I wanna walk up to him, maybe talk him up a bit, but looking at the people around him doing that would make me a joke. 

So I keep my distance and as they pass by me they give me a nasty side look, I stare back with a glare and until they pass, I keep staring. I sighed until some other girl walked in. She had brown curly hair and doe eyes that I could get lost in. She looked sweet, like a chocolate milkshake. She stops at her locker and, pushing away my social anxiety, I walk up to her. 

“Excuse me?” I say wearily, tapping on her shoulder, she turns to look at me with a kind smile

“Hi!” She says with a smile, I smile back and reply 

“Hi, sorry, I’m new here and I’m looking to get enrolled. I have no idea where to go.” I say sheepishly

“No worries! I’ll show you to the office!” She says, closes her locker and takes me to the office. I call out to my sister and she trails behind us. We get to the office and I start talking to them, getting enrolled blah blah blah. She leaves because class is starting and as I’m left alone there with my sister I feel a bit awkward. I start pestering her to ease the tension in the office and as she is swatting me away the lady at the desk calls me over. 

“Alright Y/N and Candace, here are your schedules and the middle school is over that way” She says pointing to the right. I nod and thank her, dragging my sister along with me to leave the high school to get to the middle school. I put our documents in my bag, making sure they are safely tucked away in order to not get ruined. Once we get outside I start heading to the middle school and as we reach the front, she stops me. 

“Do NOT go in with me Ate!” She says angrily, I roll my eyes with her and ask her why. She huffs and says that “I’ll embarrass her” So I sigh and pass her her schedule. She takes it and leaves but not without giving me a hug and an

“I love you” I smile and pat her head, I hug her back and say

“I love you too smelly, at the end of the day I’ll wait for you so we can walk back okay?” I look down at her and she nods, she runs inside and waves at me while I wave back. I wonder how she’s gonna fend for herself in there. Just a couple of months ago we were in the same school and I was showing her where to go. I feel bad ripping her from her friend group just because I graduated, but I have a feeling she’ll like it here. 

I make my way back to the high school as I look at my schedule and psigh. I don’t know how I’m gonna survive since my old school was all I knew, but oh well. New beginnings I guess. I head inside and look for first period, math, the subject I was best in. Took me 10 minutes to look for the room and as I walked in, the lesson had already begun. I stood there, sweat dripping down my face as the teacher snapped his neck to look at me. 

“So, you must be the new student, everyone greet Y/N!” He says with a smile, I look to the class and suddenly I regret wearing this outfit. I see some people giggling, whispering to each other, as if I wasn’t there. He tells me to sit in the middle, right next to some guy who I saw that had the perfect hair. I sit down and he eyes me. The lesson resumes and as I’m spacing out, I feel something hit me and I look and see him. His eyes point down and I see a tiny paper ball, I grab it and open it to read. 

“Welcome to Hawkins sweetheart” it read, I looked at him putting on my doe eyes, the name sweetheart makes me swoon, but I know I shouldn’t be so open. I write back “Hi :3” and pass it back to him. The teacher looks at us so we stop passing notes. Class ends and as I get up and grab my things he grabs my arm. I look up at him with a pouty look and he lets go. 

“Sorry Y/N, I just wanted to say that you looked cute” he says with a light blush, I thank him and smile 

“Obviously you know my name, so what’s yours?” I ask

“Steve, Steve Harrington” He says smiling, I look at the clock on the wall and notice that second period is starting

[makostarz]

Snapshot: Chapter 9

(A/N: wow im really pumping these chapters out aren't i)

It was time to get to work.

Polaris jumped out of her ship and immediately called the Pikmin out of the Onion. She had 5 hours to explore the area, and there was no time to waste. She ran in a random direction and looked around. The Pikmin struggled to keep up, their little legs scurrying as fast as they could. Polaris looked behind her, and saw that the Pikmin were being overexerted . “Oh, my bad,” she called out to the Pikmin. “Let me slow down a bit.” She let her pace slow down, but was still running at a medium-fast speed. She was making excellent time, and was feeling confident. “Heh,” she thought, “This will be a breeze.”

Some time later, the group ran into a stream.  It was too wide and deep to cross over without anyone getting injured. “Great,” Polaris muttered, “Dead end. I just can’t cross over it without the Pikmin. What can I do? ”  Maple waddled up to Polaris, and leaned down their head. “Hm? What’s up?”, Polaris asked.  Maple hopped around, trying to tell Polaris something. “What’s wrong? Is everything alright?”, Polaris said, confused as to what Maple was wanting her to do. The group stood in confusion for a brief moment, then the idea came to Polaris. “Oh! You want me to throw you over the river, right?”, Polaris asked Maple. The little creature squeaked and nodded in agreement. “Alright,” Polaris said. “Here goes.” She grabbed Maple by its stem, and threw the little creature as hard as she could. Maple flew above the stream, and landed with a soft thud. The little Pikmin jumped up and down in joy, squeaking in excitement. “Yes!”, Polaris exclaimed, “It worked!” The remaining Pikmin seemed willing to be thrown, and were waiting for Polaris to throw them. “Alright,” Polaris said, stooping down to lock eyes with the Pikmin, “Here’s the plan. I’m gonna throw you all, one at a time, over that stream, and then I’ll cross over by myself. Sounds good?” The Pikmin nodded in agreement. “Alright. Ready when you all are,” Polaris said. One by one, the Pikmin dipped down their heads, ready to be thrown. Polaris hastily grabbed each one and tossed them over the stream, one by one. They all softly landed on the other side of the river, and Polaris exhaled. No one had got hurt, and it was safe for her to cross by herself. She waded through the stream, slipping and stumbling all the way across. Finally, she had made it across the river. “Whew!”, she panted, “That was a workout. Everyone good?” The Pikmin nodded. “Alright. Let's keep up the pace!”, Polaris called out, sprinting off.

It was the middle of the day. Polaris and her tiny squad of Pikmin trekked on, scanning the area for any signs of the castaway.  “Hm,” Polaris thought aloud. “I don’t think the castaway’s over here. Where could they even be? Did I even come to the right place to begin with? Ugh.” She huffed, flopping her arms down. Something came into Polaris’s field of vision. Wait- it could be the castaway! She rushed over to the strange object, her heart racing. It turned out to be a pipe. “Oh,” Polaris sighed, “Just a pipe. Wonder what's inside…” She leaned over, investigating the strange pipe. She saw nothing but the abyss, seeming to have no end. “Hello?”, she called out, her voice echoing into the void. “Anyone in there?” She leaned in even further.

And just like that, she fell right in.