#im that autistic-like sure fine
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I don't know How To People. Please someone tell me How To People
#BOTH IN PERSON AND ONLINE#I NEED A MAP#I NEED DATA#AND NOTES#I HAVE! NOTES#I USED TO WRITE NOTEBOOKS ABOUT EVERYONE AND THEIR CHARACTER TRAITS TO UNDERSTAND PEOPLE BETTER BECAUSE THEYRE CONFUSING#IM NOT JOKING#I HAD TO READ MY TEACHER'S PAGE DURING HER CLASS PERIOD ONCE#SHE WAS LIKE 'eh#'wasnt spot on but good try'#once i went to the toilets and when I came back my notebook was GONE#Turned out my class was just. passing it through class#I didnt mind#im that autistic-like sure fine#I dont think my ntebooks are weird even if they probably are to everyone else go ahead#someone left me a sticker#what was the point of this#PEOPLE#SOMEONE HELP#Note says things#not an art post
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Gold and Silver are good kids and Gold likes to show up unannounced to Lance's house post-game to bother Silver and Silver is like 'ugh great just what I need a loud annoying weirdo' but they are neither loud nor annoying while they hang out they just quietly sit on the floor reading magazines abt pokemon or playing video games and sometimes Gold will shove something in Silver's face like 'WHOA CHECK THIS OUT' and Silver will be like 'can you quiet down. What stupid thing could possibly get you that excited' as if he wouldn't also be equally excited about the very cool article about Sharpedo Gold just found
#spitblaze says things#i just thing gold and silver are two different flavors of neurodivergent#gold has the overactive adhd kind and had issues w volume and impulse control#silver has the quiet (traumatized) autistic kind where he basically makes his way thru life by playing 4d Social Expectation chess#v good at masking. unfortunately his mask is aggression#gold doesnt care hes hot garbage with social cues too but makes zero effort to mask or compensate#its fine tho they both have the same special interest. Pokemon#(also gold makes a very good compression stim. silver will just be like 'will you lay on me please' and gold is like 'sure thing buddy :)'#and theyre just like that. on the floor. like cats. clair doesnt really know what to make of it but silver doesnt seem bothered#so its probably fine)#pokemon#preciousmetalshipping#(i mean i guess lol. either way they are Best Fwiends)#trainer gold#rival silver#idk why im so invested in these two. johto isnt even in my top 5#pokemon gsc
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mannn being hyper fixated on dndads means that I haven't had a little high int low wis autistic nerd to project on for like . two years . that's so fucked man . you're gonna look me in my eyes and tell me you have three seasons and not one single weird little brainiac who is the biggest dumbass you've ever seen . the closest I've got here is nicholas . and I love him *so* much but he exists for like 4 episodes . maybe Terry but like . that's *all* fanon Terry . he isn't like that in canon . I've been starving out here you guys .
#just blahs#if anyone comes on here and says anything about not liking nicholas im killing you btw#anyways#methinks that's why im latching onto campaign one of rwd so hard now#bcs theyve got TWO of those fuckers in there#god those kinds of characters are fucking drugs to me#and brother im about to relapse after two years of being clean#vr la rwd save me#save me dani rwd#listen as a weird little smartass autistic who is a fucking dumbass when it comes to anything else#it is vital to my survival to have a guy I can think about when im dying out here ok#blaming the dndads hyperfixation for me struggling so bad this last year#surely if idve had a Guy to think about going through this exact thing i would've been fine#i wouldntve#but i mightve written more fanfic
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my mom: ur not autistic, stop
also her: describes aspects of my childhood that r v obvious signs of autism
#autism#im 99.99999% sure im autistic#asd#autism spectrum disorder#actually autistic#autistic things#autistic adult#like srsly shed be like#“oh yea when u were a toddler u used to spin alot and even when u fell u got back up to spin again”#or#“whenever u fell u used to cry alot even tho u were physically fine”#“ur a v picky eater”#botch those r autistjc traits???#jus bc i didnt have obvious “meltdowns” dont mean shit#also i hate callin them “meltdowns” bc its literally jus a fuckin breakdown due to sensory overloads like 99% of the time#also i was apparently diagnosed w “pure laziness” as a kid despite the fact that i did a majority of wut i was told#im sorry that child me couldnt help but piss the bed bc of anxiety??? like that loterally a sign of childhood anxiety but nope#i was “too smart” 🙄#“you cant be autistic ur in the gifted program”#bjtch stfu all gifted kids r neurodivergent
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okay i know i said yeseo is dense but manages to make it endearing. but over 130 chapters in with him still being this like...not even dense really its more like he's refusing to learn or change his biased preconceptions about cedric, now im starting to wanna strangle him a bit.
#like. dude. how much linger are you gonna refuse to examine everything he's doing for you ans how he cares for you#sure you're friends now but this is like. insane how much you just assume mean intent from him#AND LIKE. YOU CAN ASSUME GOOD INTENT FROM HIS MOTHER JUST FINE??? AND THEYRE SUPER SIMILAR#hes just super autistic can you please be a bit more receptive towards his emotionsss#and like. its not that yeseo is Unkind to cedric but he does not at ALL realize just how unfavorably biased he is towards him#and it sucks sooooo bad#not that cedric is entirely blameless he needs to control his temper and do away w at least a bit of his pride#(cough stubbornness)#but like. come ON yeseo#i know you have a mental divide between you and these people bc youre like 'im in a book and they actuallynlive in this world'#but it is so extremely pronounced with cedric#he can treat everyone else as a person instead of a character EXCEPT cedric#even worse is that he doesnt even treat him as a Character bc good characters are non-static. they grow and change#he treats cedric like he is completely static and will always be exactly the way he is in the book and it drives me fucking insaneee#it huuurts like. its not even funny to me at this point. yeseo can you please view him as his own person for 2 secondsss#EDIT: IM STILL UPSET LIKE. YESEO. HOW DO YOU HEAR CEDRIC LEGIT GO 'as you wish' AND NOT GET IT#YOU RECOGNIZE EVERY REFERENCE THE AUTHOR MADE SO FAR BUT NOT THAT ONE??? BE SERIOUS
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omg the cute autistic/mutual friend at the party I was talking ab way back just moved into our building!!! I legit ran into him omw in and exchanged instas he is SO adorable and cute and I love him like I just wanna be around him so like tf I am SO HAPPY
#im not sure the post is even still up but me n my friends were just having a casual gettogether and i met him n my post was talking ab how#im glad no annoying autsitics have been introduced to me yet bc ive already met like 3 and theyre all either like#smart autistics or adorable autistics or interesting autistics and i have a crush on two of them including the cute autistic this post is ab#like im so HAPPY omg im gonna bug him so much its weird bc idk what u call the type of crush where its like im not searching for romance#but i will do anything to be in ur prescense bc i know id enjoy being friends or partners or whatever the fuck involves KNOWING YOU#idk lol#yutamayo is starting the day off right (#(its 3:47pm)#at the party we were playing Detroit Become Human anf he seems to also be a hyperfixation/skilled autistic bc he SLAYED at the game i just#enjoyed watching him speedplay at that point#and everyone was ig close enough with him to call him by a semiracist nickname bc hes indigenous n his last name wad apparently too long#so i was like NOPE and made sure to spell it out and resay it so i could say his last name properly instead of his nickname#im noy shading them bc its fine to have a close friend thing where ur able to have a joking nickname ab a characteristic like my bestie#calls me “it” sometimes and thats not something i dislike bc we KNOW each other and its the opposite of malicious intent#but yeah i wad likr nah id prefer to know how to say it#then it was like 3am anf there was only like 4ppl left n he was like yeah i gotta go bavk home to whitby apparently he was just gonna#use the electric scooters they have around town but thats like 30min away in the mf a.m#n he didnt wanna crash on our couch which isfine n everyone else was like mkay bye bc yhey wanted to sleep#n i was like NOPE and hunted down bus fare n waited with him at the bus stop for the night bus n made sure he got on it then never saw him#again#until#today#god fucking bless#*introduced to 3 autistics not 3 annoying autistics the post was ab how im gkad i havent met an annoying autistic in my buikding yet*
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Ok I actually love hazel she’s great she’s like blunt I love her hope she shows up more
#this is genuine btw I’m happy for them ((:#they’re like different types of autistic im sorry for saying it I make everything into autism related#I need more autism please#the suckening#the Suckening spoilers#hope I don’t need to put the jrwi in it I’m sure it’s fine tho
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its 4 am and well, im not doomscrolling but i have thoughts lol... i should turn them off and go back to sleep
#minhmy rambles#for the record right now im completely fine like. im not gonna let this stupid orange stop me#thankfully im relatively safe in my state and im so so glad for it but y'know. you never know#but yesterday i was busy w work and also loads of other things like Being Sick so didn't have the mental fortitude to keep up w everything#and i think its helped me like. im not gonna dwell on it. i shouldn't. yeah things Suck but id rather live my life day by day and Not/#self-destruct over it. and this is just me as well. ik everyone else is freaking out and you all have a right to. i just have to keep going#like its not me trying to be callous or y'know high and mighty for feeling better over it than others i don't wanna come off like that but.#i just feel safe here in hawaii things obvs still suck like i said and things can get worse esp for us but i feel safe here ill be ok#and i worry for my friends and everyone whose lives are impacted way more strongly than me and have a lot to worry about#like it could just be me being ignorant. or whatever. but i know everything is bad i just can't let it affect me rn#me rambling as if someones gonna read this and judge me so harshly...!!!#but its just the truth. im sad for everyone but i can keep going and so should you. i have so much to live for and if the only reason you/#have now is spite then you should do it. hey maybe someone will successfully kill the guy. instead of missing. but once these 4 years/#of hell are over we won't have him again. it might be even worse then#like in terms of presidential canididates. i know this. but its okay itll be okay#and i cant ask that ppl will adopt the same attitude as me lol i know im an outlier for sure but. its gonna be okay regardless#ill be okay despite being afab poc and Also autistic (ig i shouldn't look to getting a diagnosis yet which sucks..) but i'll Be Okay#and i hope everyone else will be too; in time.
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diversity loss! local autistic forced to deal with plans being suddenly changed
#I am going. to kill someone#like I get the cause of this was something out of anyone’s hands. it’s not my sisters fault things changed.#but we went from ‘I’ll come down Monday + Tuesday to help you move then drive to the lake for the rest of the week’#to ‘actually we’re moving tomorrow can you make it a day trip and then leave Saturday for the lake w everyone else’#and like. sure. arguably this is a ‘better’ set up but. I fucking HATE change like this#especially bc it’s so late like. okay then guess I’ll fuck myself.#I need to go unpack all my shit (bc I was being GOOD and doing shit EARLY for once!) and repack for the new plans#and like. fucking emotionally prepare for this new change bc I wasn’t THINKING this was gonna happen. im not READY yknow?#idk. fucking. slams autistic diagnostic ‘inflexible adherence to routines’#my ROUTINE has been CHANGED (on top of ALREADY being disturbed by this whole trip) and it’s causing DISTRESS#< like. dw I’m fine i just need to be a bitch about it for a bit
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i did a silly thing
@mommyclan and @fen-the-space-dragon (owner of middlepaw)
#im not sure if this would be in character for middlepaw#im not the best at making comics can you tell :P#but i in general dont like making or reading comics#anyways middlepaw is so JDHSKHSKSHSLSJ 💖#OH MY FUCKING GOD I MESSED UP LITTLEPAWS TOE COLORS#thats okay this is just for sillies and fun 👍👍#littlepaw#middlepaw#mommyclan#wc oc#explanation:#littlepaw is following a bug on the ground and when she accidentally bumps into middlepaw. she sits up and 👀s away from eye contact.#middlepaw gives littlepaw the bug because she is just🧍🏼♂️ing there and#it’s like OH yeah! and she viciously SNATCHES it and runs away from the social interaction#then— like every autistic(joke)— it thinks about how much she failed at socializing (she was literally fine) while staring at the bug#middlepaw is hard to draw bc it is not my style….#still love them tho
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currently one week into a two-week stay with a terrible relative who needed help recovering from an operation and because i'm the only competent adult who was willing to do it (my dad literally lives with her but is both incompetent and unwilling) and i just. do not know how much more of this i can tolerate
she has the most TERRIBLE opinions and every morning when i sit down she'll just say something AWFUL and i have no choice but to respond because how on earth can you sit and listen to someone say something so repugnant and NOT say something. the one good thing i can say about her is that she isn't a tory but every other terrible evil little box you could tick, she probably fits it
i'm sure you're wondering, quite fairly, why i have even come here knowing this is the case. just to clarify, she has NEVER been this overtly awful before. like don't get me wrong, i knew she had some questionable opinions and i've butted heads with her about her views before but it's never been on this level. i think that now i'm an adult she feels free to go full mask off with everything and i'm like listen i'm usually in favour of unmasking but in this case can you put that shit back on, right the fuck now, preferably with superglue. and then apply said superglue to your mouth
the only reason i haven't just fucking walked out already is because my brother is coming down here on wednesday to see her for the first time since he started on testosterone, and i am genuinely concerned about how this woman will react because like. i'm sure saying she's also a transphobe will come as a shock to no one and for obvious reasons no one has told her... but when she actually sees him and hears him speak in person i feel like she's going to you know. catch on. fairly quickly. and i need to be here so i can back him up against the potential fallout and so i can get him out if things turn nasty. like it's not that i think she'd be able to DO anything, she's an old woman and she's just had surgery, but like. i'm obviously not gonna leave my brother to deal with that shit by himself
but yeah every minute i spend here is slowly crushing my soul to powder and making me feel unwell at the idea that there are real people who fucking think like this. and not only do they think it but they're willing to SAY IT and think it's a normal fucking thing to believe!!! and then when i go "what the fuck is wrong with you" and argue back she acts like there's something wrong with ME!!!! LIKE I'M THE BAD PERSON??? HUHHHHHHH???
#and this isn't even touching upon the hundreds of insane little rules she has for EVERYTHING. E V E R Y T H I N G#look im autistic. i'm cool with rules. but the sheer NUMBER OF RULES THIS WOMAN HAS ABOUT EVERY FACET OF EXISTENCE#ONE CANNOT POSSIBLY REMEMBER THEM ALL#the dishwasher has to be loaded in a certain way. if i put a single plate in the wrong place she freaks out and makes me move it#she has a fork preference which is fine and normal except that she INSISTS THAT OTHER PEOPLE ALSO ADHERE TO *HER* PREFERRED UTENSILS#like one type of fork is for dessert and one type of fork is for normal food. she didn't like the knives i picked because they're “too big”#(babe they're YOUR KNIVES) but then when i set the table she told me off because i should have used the big knife for my dad#because it's a “man's knife” SHUT UP. GENUINELY SHUT UP.#she told me to hang the clothes on the line straight so they don't get creased. okay makes sense#NO THAT'S TOO STRAIGHT. YOU'LL STRETCH THEM HANGING THEM LIKE THAT.#i even have to put the FUCKING WASHING UP BOWL IN THE SINK IN A CERTAIN DIRECTION. YOU COULD NOT MAKE THIS UP#im constantly on edge because everything i do is wrong in some way and there's just so many pointless rules to remember#like idk about you guys but if it were me. if someone had come to stay with me to help me after a surgery#and was cooking and doing the washing up and doing my errands for me. i would simply fucking say thank you?#i wouldn't be standing over them to make sure i didn't fold a fucking sock the wrong way
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my grandma just fell and hit her head on some bricks and we’re probably gonna have to go to the hospital but my Empathy ™ hasn’t kicked in so i’m just brushing my teeth and scrolling through instagram reels
#moments like these i question many thing#i think she’s fine#i’m not sure#it happened outside so im like listening in cause im inside#but idk#we’re def going to the hospital thi#okay#im gonna wash my face#autism#autistic#actually autistic#asd#autism spectrum disorder#autistic things#on the spectrum#autistic problems#autism problems
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working w autism deserves some kind of award bc the amount of times managers will say "do (vague thing)" with absolutely 0 clarification and so much room for interpretation and then get mad when u interpret it wrong but actually they should have added some details...... insane
#'make sure your area is mopped' okay I thought I was#and so then I extended where I mopped bc im like I guess this other area is my area#AND HE'S STILL LIKE. NO YOU NEED TO MOP OVER HERE TOO#an entirely different area that's nowhere near where I work#and like if I'm responsible for that area getting mopped that's so fine but TELL ME WHAT MY AREA IS THEN????#like if it's not where I'm working TELL ME WHAT MY AREA TO MOP IS..... God#and that's just today's example I have endless bc I've been working while autistic for 6 years kms
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What if I gave Zane's robot appearance a screen instead of a human-like face? His default face is still o_o but let him emote through symbols and emoticons like ? !! UwU >:O ;-; <3 and >///<. He and Jay could add more and even add kaomojis over time to give him more expressions.
#ninjago#i want opinions#please also consider: the techoshipping potential#yknow how when static electricity builds up and you touch a computer screen it flickers or glitches for a sec??#that but jay and zane touching foreheads or jay holding zane's face bc something something master of lighting = accidental shocks#it freaks zane out at first bc hes not sure if its safe but after he realizes it actually fine it makes him all giddy every time it happens#his screen goes like \(≧▽≦)/#also happy little beeps and boops bc zane is autistic and theyre his vocal stims#source: me im autistic i know every autistic character in existence /j#i love taking the more robot aspects of zane and turning them human
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Are the neurotypicals in the room with us?
#THIS IS SO DUMB OAWFW0HWAFHOAW]#theres not a single neurotypical person on the lonnt team I'm sorry#Mark and Erin?#autism.#Jamie?#ADHD.#Charlie?#(based on a conversation with my sibling)#Autistic AND has OCD#but like#actual OCD not that white-girl neurotypical-ed “OMG its uneven my OCD😭😭😫😫” version of it.#now obviously some people with actual OCD might have that as a trigger which is completely fine and valid!#but you know exactly what im talking about#idk wtf Kate has but she sure as hell ain't neurotypical#and all of them have anxiety!#and depression proabably#and you wanna know what?#Erins dyslexic now!#sorry not sorry💃#Charlie also has BPD.#you wanna know what?#Kate does too now#you cant stop me#i will neurospicy all my fav characters cuz I'm neurospicy and THERES NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT!!!#anyways~~~~#The Devil in Me#TDiM#The Dark Pictures#The Dark Pictures Anthology#Mark Nestor
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IT HAS TAKEN ME FUCKING YEARS BUT IM FINALLY ABLE TO ACCESS THIS GODAWFUL ACCOUNT. i dont apologize for any inactivity and im surely not making a comeback, personally i’d like to forget this fucking blog ever existed. but im back nonetheless to give a life update or closing statement before i log out and finally live my life peacefully or smthn.
1. im not like this anymore. jesus christ. fortunately i’ve matured as a person now that i’m nearly 18 years old and i actually understand bungo stray dogs now.
2. nothing on here reflects who i am now. i fucking hate soukoku. i hate sskk. i hate bsd ships. i think a lot of the jokes on here were in poor taste and the whole schtick was character inaccurate… it was definitely fun at the time, but, alas, it is not that time anymore.
3. i have a new tumblr tjat u should probably go follow instead of this one if u ever want to see content from me. @nouveauxamoris 👍🏽
4. this has no relevance to anything else im just spreading my propaganda . chuuya nakahara is a trans woman . dazai osamu is a transmasc lesbian. dazai and chuuya have the exact same relationship dynamic as branch and his sleazy older brother from trolls. skk yaoi was never real and i no longer pretend like it was
#Im free from my shackles#no lomger held down by my haunting past that is awkward-dazai on tumblr dot com#nobody should have ever let me have access to tumblr at god knows how old i was when i made this#i promise im normal now#Not really#ive just learned how to be media literate and have gotten progressively more autistic abt bsd#I also realized that bsd ships kinda suck and really i shouldve jsut embraced my true nature instead#selfshipping. I wanted dazai osamu. I want him real bad. And now i self ship.#word of advice from your good old friend amoris awkward dazai#your enjoyment of anything media related will definitely improve once you embrace self shipping#you can do tjat. Its fine. nobody can stop you. be free#awkward-dazai#i hope u guys had fun w this blog im pretty sure i did#i loathe it now but it was 13 year old me’s pride and jou#i want it to become lost media so i can pretend like it never existed but#alls well that ends well or some bullshit like that#happy 2024 guys
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