#im starting to feel like i should create a side blog for all this shit LMAO
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alright lads. ik we haven't posted much lately, mostly cus we're all busy, but like someone with a big blog here has to start fucking saying this shit again, not to scold yall like im yer mom but for the love of fuck.
stop with the sending threats n suibait shit, regardless what fucking side you or the other person is on, stop sending vile shit to eachother. theres a huge fucking influx of both anti rq and prats getting shit in their inboxs, who ever the fuck any of you scumbags are ; get off the fucking internet if you cant fucking control yourself under anonymity. youre clearly doing this shit cus you have the ability to be anonymous on the internet and you wanna hurt people with it, even if you have a reason this person should feel bad for something, dont fucking do it through telling them to die or sending them threats, the bar is so low for this kinda shit and youre limboing with the earths core right now.
im aware we are all angry, with all the shit that is happening on both ends at the moment, theres alot of new disgusting shit happening every day i log on here, but for the love of god be civil for a second, theres no point in tearing at the others who are on your side and theres no point in throwing vile, empty threats at people you dont like, it makes us all look fucking bad when one of us, or someone who isnt even one of us, does it.
we all fucking know by now that rqs arnt as "anti harassment" as they like to say n all that shit, thats not a fucking excuse for any of yall to do it.
get a fucking grip, alright. stick to calling out the vile shit, not creating more.
#anti radqueer#anti transid#anti transabled#anti transx#antiradqueer#anti transrace#anti trace#anti transautistic#mod mew
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i used to go here a while back even though i wasnât rlly a proper larrie (complicated lol). at one point i started talking mad shit about them and everyone hated me only for me to come back and see how different people move now. womp womp :/ i genuinely feel like everyone dislikes them a teeny tiny bit, itâs weird to see. back then it was a big deal if you got away with a tad bit of criticism and anyone who was proper bitter was ousted into a small corner of this site where they stayed bitter with their anons. and it was also like 3 people. now im checking random blogs and literally everyone has some shady thing to say. DESERVED tbh. leaving before I say more. sorry if this is annoying or unnecessary. i just wanted to say it đśâđŤď¸đśâđŤď¸đśâđŤď¸
I mean⌠if youâve been following closer, they have been clearly very hard on larries for a while. Take Harry for example. This past summer he made his life purpose to destroy all things larries used as⌠something lol blue bandana? Here, X*nder have it. Sweet creature? Itâs for Gemma and he said it in front of 90K people which was very humiliating imo. Umbro shirt? Listen, heâll have it for a pap walk he will have to promote his brand and yall like bluegreen nail polish. And the last one, the one people willingly ignore, he has O*ivia name tattooed on his INNER THIGH. I dont think it gets worse than this lol do I even have to mention the biking sessions to promote a theatre play orâŚ?
Louis has been a dickhead on twitter since he was in the band. Yesterday he was even more of a dickhead than he used to. If he wants to be the third Gallagher brother he should be asking them first. He was unnecessarily rude with everyone and with the chicken parmesan thing he showed to me he doesnât even read the tweets or whatever issue with reading comprehension he has going on.
The good thing about social media instead of live or interviews is that you can take your time to write down some articulated response and that you happen to choose what you reply to.
He announced he was going to do this thing 24 hours prior, went online and treated everyone with sufficiency. Totally unprovoked. Can you see how prepared this was? That makes it even worse because he is acting like this on purpose and everyone knows it. Like whatâs the point of doing that speech on stage everyone gets so emotional for if you go online and bicker with your fans? Theyâre not taken for granted when they buy your tickets, but when they tweet constantly about you and keep you relevant on social theyâre? This tells a lot to me.
The problem is he wants to deny what he created (he mentioned the recipe even for walls promo) but he puts a target on larriesâ back as always, because his fans can be unreasonably nasty and the pop world hates larries already they donât waste a minute to start alienating them, insult them and bully them out of the safe space they have created for themselves. Itâs the marketing they have chosen, their propaganda.
Itâs weird when accounts with huge following interact with this part of fandom, because they never do it to âprotectâ them. Weâre talking about a loud, mostly queer and young side of his fandom⌠I wonder what would happen if larries finally decided to turn their backs at them (which I encourage to do). Yes, there still might be a target on them but at least it wouldnât be like that. Iâm pretty out of the fandom, barely talk about them but I still follow some blogs so I know a few things. Iâve realised Iâm not comfortable anymore here. I still want to write a few stories because itâs fun and I like the exercise but thatâs going to be it.
#it is very deliberate to not mention Palestine and the genocide#and honestly they can get fucked for that#casella di posta numero 32
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i hope this isn't a strange/intrusive thing to ask, if it is im so sorry.
but i really like doing different pds's or blog resources, but right now being active on my blogs isn't right for me. but i miss making edits and graphics and shit! and i also need a side gig. i'm just wondering in your experience/opinion if/how much it's worth putting in the work to set up paid resources/commissions, or if i should just stick to it for fun and find another side hustle.
tyia, and so sorry if this makes you feel strange.
hi! this isn't intrusive to ask at all, nor does it make me feel strange. i don't have any issues with giving advice out ââ we're all out here to share resources, there's no need to have a competition, you know?
for me, i've personally been making graphics/doing edits/theme makeovers, etc in the rph for years now, probably close to around ten-ish, and a lot of that time was doing them for free. it was completely fine and at that time i wasn't looking to charge for resources, and i once looked down on people for charging for their things. however, i got older and things got more intricate than they used to, and i had people asking for commissions from me. it was weird at first, and then i started to like it. i've been doing it on cerberuscomms now for around four years now and i don't regret it.
i would say that if you're going to get into it for a side gig, know that you're not going to make a ton of money right off the bat, nor may you ever. it might take a bit to get your first commission or sell your first resource. you also have to think of how much money you're going to have to put into it to start out as well. if you want to sell through deviantart (which personally is where i've found success in when it comes to selling my psds), you'll have to pay at least $40.00 for a year subscription to Core Membership, which is the tier that allows you to sell. there's also fees taken out of what you sell as well. you can also sell on plays like ko-fi and payhip, and those don't require any sort of membership. i find that people don't go for them as much though.
i personally think doing commissions are fun because i've learned a lot along the way and i've learned to push myself out of my comfort zone and actually try new things to make my resources better. there is that downside though that sometimes i'm more self conscious, especially seeing what other people create and when the overly opinionated hate anons come in at times. so it's an up and down balance scale, because there are times when i don't want to do it ââ and when it feels like it's taken away the joy i've had with creating.
but it's one of those things that rebound with time. and i think it's a good side gig to actually have. it just matters how much time you have to dedicate to it, because until you're actually established, having the highest activity you possibly can is going to be key to getting followers and more eyes on your blog as well.
i hope this helped!
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(insert non descript simping here because i dont wanna traumatize my friends)
#teresa.txt#dont perceive me#im starting to feel like i should create a side blog for all this shit LMAO#that meme of I will sit here consumed with lust for the rest of the evening#saw a video and the shoulders and back were broad and i am weak#saw a pic and felt like a victorian gentleman respectfully looking away at the highlighted hip#its fine im fine#its monday#i finally slept eight hours and i have no work tasks as of right now so apparently i have the brain power to uhhh make it short circuit#do i tag it. everyones gotta know who this is about anyway#ashton irwin
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Okay you know what, Iâve held this back far enough
Why I hate canon Kailor sm
Tw:// misogyny ment, incest ment
Im not gonna tag Kailor on this for obvious reasons plus this is kinda a long post, I donât mind fanon Kailor mostly because tbh I donât think itâs really a big thing and most I have seen of it is fine. Donât read this if you like Kailor and donât want to hear it bashed
Okay listen, s4 is my favorite season out of all ninjago, but if theres one thing I hate about it the most is Kailor. This ship has always been really annoying to me throughout the show, and Iâve hinted towards that in my blog. But why?
1. Itâs basically jaya redone
Kailor brings nothing new or interesting to the table because honestly? Itâs literally just the same dynamic as jaya. Socially awkward guy simps for usually unimpressed girl until she eventually caves in and they start dating.
Not only has this already been done before with jaya, but is also completely out of character for Kai to do.
While I admit seeing Kai as a flustered dork is kinda funny, once you realize the context of the situation that theyâre in itâs pretty clear that Kai would never actually do this.
Reminder: Kai JUST found out his dead friend is alive and is forced to recognsizle with friends in order to get him back
Usually when Kai is presented in a situation like this, what he normally does is set himself dead first on the task at hand and usually ignores any distractions. Heâs mostly distance and seemingly uncaring
((note this is after Zane died and Kai ran away from the ninja because of cole and jays bickering, knowing him he wouldnât be the most excited to be back. His arc should have revolved around coming to terms with lost friendships due to death or distance but that never happens)).
What Kai DOESNT do is immediately fall head over heels for a girl he JUST meet to the point where even when he sees his DEAD FRIEND ALIVE AND WELL he completely ignores that for a girl he meet less then a week ago
This is something JAY would do, not KAI, Kai is a loyal friend who do anything to save his friends, he cherishes them and would fight god to help them with anything they need, he doesnât forget them for someone new
It also does skylor unjustice as well, but weâll get there when we get there
2. It adds nothing to the characters and is otherwise never mention again
You know how bad you fuck up a relationship if the best aspect of it is how itâs rarely on screen
Even considering the fact Kailor is just jayas dynamic, the connection between skylor and Kai feels completely non existent or one sided
Most of Kailor revolves around Kai simping for skylor
They have no common interests, common goals, they rarely actually talk outside of lloyds plan to overthrow chen
The whole relationship feels forced every time itâs brought up because of how disconnected they both are to eachother, Kai only likes skylor because sheâs hot and thatâs it, nothing else about her is actually interesting to Kai in anyway ((again sort out of character for him in this situation))
Skylor and Kai donât form any genuine bond with eachother, it feels hallow and empty
Letâs compare this to lava, wait no that would be to easy, letâs compare this to pixane
Pixal and Zane both genuinely like and respect eachother, they both share bonds outside of being robots, they both care about eachother enough to know when theyâre uncomfortable or need help
Kailor is barely mentioned past s4 and most of it in s4 is Kai being a creep
Oh yeah letâs get to that
3. Itâs really really creepy
Im sorry I donât find incest jokes funny ninjago, itâs just really uncomfortable and creepy
Hopefully this goes without saying but Kai thinking skylor is hot, figuring out they might be related and no longer finding her hot, and then finding out they arenât and thinking sheâs hot is really weird and creepy
Not to mention scenes like, Kai looking into her room without her knowledge or consent
Or Kai fighting people for her when itâs not necessary
Or him trying to impress her everytime he sees her
This isnât cute or funny, itâs gross, privacy invading, and overall just very creepy and uncomfortable and most definitely not healthy
Again, this is REALLY out of character for Kai, Kai knows when to back off and respect peopleâs privacy
Literally the season before this he didnât get involved in the love triangle probably because he knew that would make Nyaâs situation worse
So for him to suddenly become this privacy evading perv is so grossly out of character for him and makes the whole relationship feel off and unhealthy
And finally
4. The whole thing is misogynistic
During this entire thing skylor doesnât get a choice in the show once, she follows the commands of her dad before Kai tells her not to like her dad and follows his lead.
She doesnât come to disliking her dad by her own thought, she was told to by Kai
She doesnât get to do anything that SHE actually wants to do until LITERALLY the VERY END
Sheâs told by guys around her what she should do constantly, even without her being a love interest thatâs just screams misogynistic to me ((Afab speaking anyways))
Everything about her character, down to the way she talks, who sheâs allied with, and even sometimes how she looks is determined by male characters
Conclusion
If canon ships were shrek movies then kailor is easily shrek the third, a constant tired unfunny mess that caused everyone to think that these ships were shit ((to be fair Jaya is kinda bad to but at least it tired to get better))
Thereâs nothing redeeming about it to me, every time itâs viewed in a romantic setting it makes me groan or upset
Whatâs even more frustrating is how people constantly say lava canât be canon because of it
Im going to go on a side tangent so you can just skip this part as it doesnât add any actual substance to my argument
But itâs so frustrating to see people say that
Cole and Kai have had a much healthier relationship and would be a lot better for there characters
But no, this stupid misogynistic creepy ship where one side isnât even consententing to it half the time is the one that has to stay canon because âitâs what the creators intendedâ
Lava isnât the superior possibly canon relationship because itâs gay, itâs superior because itâs closer to a healthy working relationship in show then kailor has been ((fanon lava and kailor doesnât count here because theyâre isnât any better fanon ship, Im just talking about in show))
But no it canât be canon and itâs unfair for people to want it to be canon because tommy created this rlly shitty straight relationship for Kai instead
TLDR; fuck kailor
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â¨Check-in Tagâ¨
Thank you @happy-lemon for tagging me âĽ
Why did you choose your url? I wanted something that will connect my blog to ts3 gameplay specifically but I was super new to the game so I just went with the world I knew of :)
How long have you been on tumblr? Oh itâs definitely over a year (or two?) now on this blog and literal yearsss on tumblr in general. Previously I was also on ts4 side of the community
Do you have a queue tag? Nope, I donât consider it âusefulâ for the way I post on this blog, otherwise all my posts will have the queue tag and that kind of lose make it lose itâs original purpose right?
Why did you start your blog in the first place? Iâm all about online communities and sharing og content with others, I think it gives me satisfaction and a sense of fulfillment in my hobbies plus I really just like watching other peopleâs content. I have a bad experience with ts4 side of tumblr but ts3 side seemed much smaller and chill. Like you can see thereâs nothing about popularity and growing big blogs here, maybe because the community grew over years and who wanted to stay and share a content stayed and who cared about network moved on? I might be very wrong but thatâs how I felt when I decided to join. I do really enjoy it here
Why did you choose your icon/pfp? I tend to change my pfp a lot but itâs always the sim I created and play with :) I love their cute faces (and also it shows Iâm a sims blog after all right?)
Why did you choose your header? I donât have a header atm
Whatâs your post with the most notes? Currently itâs my âfirstâ post with Cassie, right when I came back with new posts after I deleted everything
How many mutuals do you have? I honestly have no idea XD but the community is so close here I think most of us are mutuals
How many followers do you have? 1489 as we speak, and Iâm grateful for each one of you!
How many people do you follow? 258 (that is actually so little, Im sorry)
Have you ever made a shit post? I feel Iâm too old to understand the idea of a shitposting XD but maybe when I was younger and on another blog?
Did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? Who won? I donât think so, I try to avoid dramas as much as I can. Iâm mostly a ts3 content creator so Iâm here to share my content, not to create beef with people I donât agree with and be an attention seeker
How do you feel about âyou need to reblog thisâ posts? I donât think anyone should feel obligated to reblog something they donât want to. Yeah, there are important issues within the community and this world but I believe we all come here to enjoy the game and sometimes we just want to have a moment to not care about any current issues
Do you like tag games? I love them!
Do you like ask games? Well, same thing as stated above
Which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous? I mean... all of them? We are close knitted small community, itâs like everyone knows everyone XD
Do you have a crush on a mutual? Crush as a traditional meaning of that word or crush as âI adore your contentâ? If so I have a âsimblr crushâ on many people tbh. For example I love @pixelbots (bc for real, who doesnât?), @tragicpixel and @teekapoa because of how they can make such unique sims with huge personalities, @walkofpixels I am jealous of her slow paced gameplay! ughhhh all my mutuals are fantastic!
I donât feel like tagging anyone specific bc for real I donât keep track of what tags ppl did in the past anymore, so I tag you reading this!!! hehe
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Hello Tumblr people. Iâm 31 years old and Iâve been on Tumblr since 2014. Thatâs not really old, and thatâs not really a long time, but I know itâs older and longer than a lot of other folks. Tumblr is a space mainly populated by teens and twenties, and I know when I was in that age group, I thought 31 was a Real Adult (TM) Which, shit, itâs not, itâs really not, especially not for me, but nonetheless, I have learned some things in my time that I wish I could impart to my younger self, and instead will impart to yâall. Take what you like and what works for you and leave the rest, Iâm no expert or guru or authority on anything, Iâm just trying to be helpful. Being nice costs nothing. I once was standoffish to someone who came and chatted to me in IMs. That guy later died. True story. I feel terrible about it to this day. I was wary and kind of snotty in those days and I regret that. Itâs one thing to be careful about strangers approaching but that wasnât what I did here. It costs nothing to be nice. It costs nothing to be friendly. To do stuff like show interest in others, care about what they have to say, comment when they share things about their day. These are tiny things that cost nothing but give so much. Donât pass the opportunity by. And definitely donât snub someone for no reason. If you donât want to interact, you donât have to, but donât be cold about it unless itâs legitimately because youâre uncomfy with this person and want them to go away. Your safety and comfort do come before any obligation to be nice, but I hope itâs clear thatâs not what Iâm talking about here. Be a candle that lights other candles. You know what else costs nothing? Encouragement. Thereâs nothing stopping you from telling others what you like about their content, what they post, what they create, what thoughts they have, the things they say, or just how passionate they are about something. Thereâs nothing stopping you from saying you hope the best for someone going through a rough time, or how cute their pets are, or how youâre glad they got themselves a treat today. You donât need to be someoneâs therapist ---I know I sure donât have the emotional energy for that--or have solutions for them, you donât need to force yourself to say anything insincere or that you donât have the spoons for, but when you can, say something positive to others. First impressions can be wrong but gut feelings are often right. Like I said, being nice should NEVER trump your own comfort or safety. If you get weird vibes from someone, book it. Sure, you could be wrong. Iâve been wrong about a lot of people. Iâve also been right about others, and should have left when I had the chance before they could prove to me how right I was. Technically, there was nothing stopping me. It was online, after all. I could have just vanished and theyâd probably never have tracked me down or made contact again. But I was lonely, and socially awkward, and like many people, most of my human contact was online, and I thought that this was worth it. Itâs not. Whatever kind of friendship or therapeutic RP or free art or support or compliments or advice youâre getting from someone online. . . itâs not worth it if theyâre mean or creepy too. Whatever you are getting, you can find it somewhere else, in someone else, who wonât make you have to put up with that kind of crap for it. If something feels wrong, donât wait around for it to get worse. Yes, you may be incorrectly judging a situation and running from nothing, but itâs better you run from nothing than NOT run from SOMETHING. And I know that things like anxiety disorders, trauma, and just different communication styles can make it hard to judge these things (Iâve thought people didnât like me before just because they were far less effusive in their typing style than I am, and I was wrong) but if you really feel uncomfortable, like this person has said mean or sexual things to you, itâs not just the brain weasels telling you lies. If youâre truly in doubt, get another personâs opinion, but also donât let them convince you âitâs nothingâ if it feels like something. Trust yourself. Creeps, like children, will test your boundaries. Kids will do shit just to see what they can get away and how far they can push you before you put your foot down. Creeps are the same. Theyâll start with stuff that you can easily ignore, brush off, and put up with without feeling itâs worth ditching the whole friendship over. But theyâll rarely let it stay there. Theyâll typically escalate it if theyâre not rebuked. Rebuke them. It can be scary. It can be hard. I know this. I know it firsthand. But feel no sympathy. Feel no fear. Tell them off and pack your bags. They want to know how much youâll put up with? Show them----nothing at all, thatâs what. Donât be afraid to change your views but donât feel the need to broadcast it. Iâm never getting a personal Tumblr. Because Iâm glad they werenât around when I was a teen. I would have posted things I donât believe now. Same for when Iâm in my 20s. And I bet that will the be the case in my 40s, 50s, and 60s too. Our lives are journeys of changing, learning, and unlearning. And thatâs great. But if you post every step of your journey for the world to see, there are those who will use it against you, even if it was stuff from years ago that you should be applauded for growing from, not derided for having ever believed in. Not to mention that whatâs the most up-to-date woke terminology and politics changes very rapidly, and what was acceptable when I was a teen is not the preferred lingo now, and itâs likely going to keep changing, and there will be people who find your posts and donât care about that either. I realize Tumblr gives us a format to metaphorically scream our present beliefs and show how right what you believe is, and the urge to reblog when you see something you agree with wholeheartedly is strong. And if youâve got a blog that doesnât easily connect back with you, or you donât plan to have for the next five years, or whatever, go ahead. But if your blog can be easily connected to you, and therefore could be connected to you again in the future, it wouldnât hurt to be a bit judicious. Iâm not saying âdonât take a stand on anything ever because you might change your mind and/or someone might drag youâ, I am saying that in the age of cancel culture and people deep digging for ancient receipts, young people are no longer getting to have their journeys, with all their rooms for fuckups and re-thinkings, that I and those before me got to have, and I think that sucks. By all means, take a stand on what you believe in now, fight for it with all your heart, just also donât make it too easy for other people to use it against you should you ever change your mind---and donât be afraid to change your mind either, even when itâs against the grain of whatâs presently popular opinion. Find things out for yourself when possible You know how when they taught you things in school about history and America and whatnot and now youâve found out that thereâs so much they DIDNâT tell you, and at least half of what they did is a very edited sack of hooey? Well, the same is true of Tumblr, Facebook, and other online spaces as well as real life. We all laugh at our Boomer parents and grandparents who share clearly false stories on Facebook because they canât tell that it was clearly crafted to incite their anger or endorsement based on how itâs tailored to validate their beliefs, but I see the same thing happen here. Loads of tale gets touted as âtrueâ on Tumblr because they have been made to appeal to us emotionally by validating our beliefs. But just because our beliefs may be good or progressive or what have you, does not mean that everything that appeals to them is going to be true. When you see a post circulating that claims something really cool about history or such is true, I suggest fact-checking it. This will help halt the spread of misinformation---even if itâs harmless---and help you build your critical thinking and research skills. This does not mean âyou must change your viewsâ it means âbe skeptical even when something validates your viewsâ People on our own side can lie, and thatâs not harmless even if it seems so---contributing to a culture of misinformation is NOT harmless, and weâre less likely to be skeptical of claims that validate what we already believe. Donât fall for this. Thatâs all. I hope something in here was valuable to you. If not, thank you for reading and I hope you have a great day!
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Toko! I was thinking of creating an ask the character blog for IDV or Genshin Impact and wanted a few tips on how to start off. Anything you can share?
ey yo my dude!! thank you so much for this question, now im lowkey tempted (again) to make a genshin ask blog sjadhlkshgkahshglsaj anyway my 1.5 cents is under the cut, yall know how much i talk here HAHAHAHAH
uhhhhhh so i guess we start with picking a character u really Vibe with tm? I KNOW THIS SOUNDS LIKE COMMON SENSE BUT LIKE ive been considering making a genshin ask blog for a while now but i never really got to it cos i couldnt really decide on a character (plus the fact that their outfits are. so intricate. is also a hmm since i try to follow details to a t) (at first i wanted to do zhongli, but i feel like to be able to muse him well u need to know the lore super super well, which i dont n im too lazy to research on that aha. n u know how much i respect characterizations, especially for such a complex character like him. i also considered xiangling for a period of time mostly for guoba but also like i have 2+1 blogs here n having one more might not be a very good idea aha) (as for aesop he was my Hyperfixation Character tm also cos i looked at his kit n went Yep i could work with this. probably)
so assuming ur not a dumbass like me n u kinda know who u wanna pick, id actually say to snoop around here for other ask blogs n kinda get a feel of the... scene? is that the word? or like u know, other blogs that u can potentially vibe with. ive run a couple of ask blogs before this current one (both that have died for different reasons) n from my experience interacting with other blogs (if theyre okay with it, i think most should be) is pretty fun. it also kinda helps get ur blog around to other ppl on other blogs so they can go Oh whats this cool shit n check u out, n its also a reason why we kinda reblog promo posts for other blogs (also cos weâre always excited when someone new comes on, its really the more the merrier. we see all :eyes:). interacting with other blogs is also an option when ur inbox is looking real roomy too
another reason why i havent exactly done a genshin blog is that idk i cant actually seem to find genshin ask blogs around (i have seen rp blogs, or those that answer asks with mostly text instead of art, but thats. not my thing since i hate my own writing aha) (i did find one aether blog some time ago, but for some reason i hardly see them around anymore??? idk man i might be wrong). its not like im trying super hard to find them ask blogs, so im sure they exist out there (hopefully?? im not sure but im being optimistic). i mean theres nothing wrong with just starting an ask blog without others around, but for me i do find a difference when i interact with other ask blogs n when i dont, n i prefer when theres others to have fun with (unfortunately i couldnt find any ask blogs to interact with in my previous fandom. i tried, but the blogs i approached seemed to go inactive shortly afterwards...) plus u get to meet friends that way too :D (i made a lot of friends via idv askblogs n its really been a joy vibing with others)
as for the idv scene. gestures around me. unfortunately there are a lot of ask blogs that arent that active anymore, but theres still some of us who are alive n kicking empty inboxes, n im sure everyone would love to see a new face around. winks at u. also there seems to be a lot more blogs popping up lately, which is really heartening to see.
then u kinda just. make ur blog? n a starting introduction post so ppl can reblog it n spread the word XD n yay u have a blog i guess??? XD
i gotta say tho. dont expect ur blog to take off immediately (especially for smaller fandoms like idv, tvbh i didnt think my blog would even get half this far when i started cos of how non existent idv tumblr seemed to be) n ur inbox will probably be looking pretty empty a lot of the time (or at least filled with some that u havent quite thought of how to reply to yet aha) (but also like empty inboxes happen pretty often, im sure most of us here have experienced this problem)
in the case of the first ask blog i ever started, it never really took off at all. ngl it was kind of demoralizing n depressing but to be fair i had picked one of the more obscure characters in the series, so obscure that many ppl in the fandom would have never heard of this character before. if u wanted to know, i took a character that only appeared in the 2nd musical of the series, who also made a very brief cameo in the manga to acknowledge his existence within that universe. thats how obscure my character was, but i went with him purely because he was my favourite character. i will say though i did enjoy it while it lasted n i learnt a lot from the experience, n i think thats whats important really.
i guess this kinda leads on (not really but let me digress) to the whole uhhhh thing where if u choose a more popular character, u get more attention. which is fine i guess? if u really vibe with the character, i mean theyre popular for a reason. n choosing a more popular fandom (like genshin) would objectively also get u more viewers n numbers. but like honestly i believe that ask blogs are meant for u to have fun with, n like trying to get popular gets tiring pretty fast (this shouldnt be like a main goal, but u know sometimes u subconsciously also want that gucci follower count n bomb ass notes or something. i used to be guilty of this until i realized it isnt worth it) especially if ur not enjoying yourself in the process. (case in point: my previous fandom was considerably larger n my blog got about 700 followers within a year or so, but it got very tiring n stressful to maintain after my interest in it died, n no one was really interacting with the blog even though i tried which kinda made it even more depressing despite the so called success n popularity of the blog)
anyway on a less serious note, theres a lot of fun stuff u can do with the ask blog, like some ask blogs have really fancy tags that i really like n try to do but also like not really HAHAHAHA. i kinda just channel what i want to see in an ask blog into my own ask blogs (good art is one, i try very hard for it to be good :,DD another is characterization, n others is just extra miscellaneous arts n stuffs like au ideas or memes. these are also somethings u could work on during ask box downtimes perhaps)
uhhh another side thing is like a posting schedule i guess? like ppl would be more likely to interact (i think) if ur blog is relatively active, n this is usually determined by the last post u made (i think XD). but like generally for blog maintenence id say try to kinda find a frequency that ur comfortable with?? cos i know my once a day posting is kinda insane if i wasnt so hyperfixated on all of this n fight the urge to dump all ur replies when u finish them XD (though ive seen some blogs do that n they do it pretty frequently so its pretty nice to know once u see their post u can spend some time going through the latest batch of posts XD) the queue function is pretty useful here even though i truthfully have never really used it, i kinda just post from my drafts really but it also helps to space out ur content to seem somewhat active especially when u dont have the time to be working on replies sometimes. i hope u know what im trying to say here aha
ANYWAY that was like my 1.5 cents cos i dont even think its worth 2 cents HAHAHAHAH these are just my thoughts from running all my blogs up till now, some that are still running n the others that have just died a natural death. i wouldnt actually delete them (theyre still around actually XD) cos theyre kinda like archives n i can look back at what i did last time. cos ngl i made some high quality stuff back then, n i dont even know how i managed to do that aldhflhdsgk. also ppl do look at archive blogs every now n then for the content thats there yknow
BUT YES anyway if u do decide to join the idv ask blogs hmu, ill be sure to give u a lil shoutout here. winks
#its me the mun#unconcerned ramblings#i know ive said that there are a lot of new blogs popping up#but uhhh i dont really dare to interact with them#considering they kinda did come in just when shit had hit the fan n idk i might have been known as The Problematic Blog tm#so i understand if ppl dont want to interact with me n im fine with it. so for now i wont be initiating anything#like dropping asks into inboxes unless i know the mun n theyre comfortable with me doing this#i will interact with everyone who drops by my inbox tho!!#i also tend to get to replies for other blogs faster than general replies cos i feel bad if i kept the other person waiting for too long#I DO forget about rp replies sometimes tho. sometimes#i try my best to get to every one of them tho. even when im kinda busy this period aha#also starting off is actually easy. its about maintaining thats difficult i feel#which is also why i havent done up a genshin ask blog yet HAHAHAHAHA#i really hate to give up on something ive already started when it comes to art projects so
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im definitely not ripping off my friend by making a list of au ideas i have no siree //gonna slap this under a readmore cause i. well i say a lot. all of the time. i tried so hard to format this Good but tumblr fucked me up i am so sorry
so first-off i know i already have one WIP AU (Auckland) on ao3 so i wont talk about That one cause like. spoilers. i actualyl have it like 80% created so its likely gonna truly get finished for once and i dont wanna ruin shit
the other one ive posted about is something me and ben (catgirlrepublic) have worked on together its not at all close to done or anything but it's. a fun little crossover. Between jdate and my fuckinuhm. Original characters story âUntitled Villains Projectâ. the sketches of the comic version ive started is actually my pinned post đđ its like the first chunk of the story, i think half of part 1? yea.
Tldr john fucking Somehow is able t oget into contact with a certain curious scientist from another reality whoâd just love to study the Soy Sauce, most certainly not for her own nefarious purposes
John and Dave meet up with the scientist, her name is Boss, and her lab assistant, Toxic, and after a bit of a preliminary Vibe Check where john determines her trustworthy (which Dave doesnt agree with,) the two agree to be taken to the world UVP is set in. from there they stay in Bossâs lab (big old fucking abandoned military lab). John and Toxic are fast friends due to mutual love-of-chaos. John n Dave get to fuckin, camp out on an air mattress.
The day after they arrive, the two get split up, not exactly intentionally; big plot points of UVP are liek. Fueled by Boss sending Toxic to go fetch her âresearch materials,â which are usually important artifacts
Fuckin side note i guess i have to explain my dumb bullshit: Bossâs, uh, field of expertise so to speak is actually fckin, basically the scientific study of magic and superpowers n shit like that. This shitâs all real in that world. Toxicâs got fuckin superpowers, so do 4 other main characters, whatever. Itâs got a bit to do with spirituality, iss Bossâs hypothesis. So she has Toxic fetch important artifacts that might have âenergiesâ to them. The thing is actually way more fuckin complictated than that, this is just Bossâs initial hypothesis.
Motherfucking anyways. So Boss gives Toxic a job to do, and John get excited about how Cool that sounds, and ends up going with Toxic, leaving Boss and Dave alone. Neither is thrilled about this. But Dave and Boss get to have a bit of conversation (while Toxic and John are off bonding and having a good time) and come to a⌠mutual grudging understanding of some kind. They still dont like each other though lmao
Theres gonna be deeper shit going on but we havent sorted it out yet/tbh havent like Written For It in a while but i still like thinking about it a lot lol
Also pretty sure our endgame is john and dave steal toxic and bring them back with em lmao boss is kind of not nice and toxic would most certainly be better off in Undisclosed. Actually theyd fucking love it. Theyd become a local cryptid im sure. Undisclosedâs mothman is a teleporting spike baby.
I have. Another crossover AU that i might. Post something about for halloween? Maybe? If i have it finished?
Crosses over into, you guessed it, another one of my original-character projects. God, am i vain or something?
I promise this is just because i think blue and dave should get to team up to beat up some monsters
Quick briefing on my fuckinuh. Original character story, this one doesnt have a name (yet? Idk lol my work never actually goes anywhere sso who gives a shit). It centers around two grim reapers, Red (26, bi woman) and Blue (22, aroace agender asshole). In this reality or whatever, grim reapers function kind of like low-level office workers. They get told whoâs going to die + when by some middle-management types, and upper management only involve themselves when punishment needs to be doled out. These Higher-Ups can be seen as analogous to Korrok; theyâre decidedly not human, never were, and fucking terrifyingly powerful. Additionally, grim reapers are sort of .. designed to be âbackground noiseâ people. In reality theyre supernatural beings and, uh, look Real Fuckin Weird (the whole deal has a neon aesthetic im terrible at drawing uwu) but most humans just perceive them like extras in a movie. A bodyâs there but the cameraâs not focused on it.
To the narrative: the shit starts when Red n Blue get relocated to Undisclosed. Relocation is something that just happens every now and then to reapers; they usually work in teams, but they get split up into different cities to avoid any strong bonds forming (a counter-union strategy from the Higher-Ups).
Red, Blue, John and Dave end up running into each other for the first time in a McDonalds where John n Dave are getting some 4am âhey, we just survived another horrific monster fightâ celebration burgers. John and Dave are the only two people who can see how⌠strange Red and Blue are. Nobody else notices.
John unintentionally pisses Blue off, leading to Blue whacking him upside the head with a dildo bat. They all four get kicked out of McDonaldâs. Dave and Red both are less than thrilled
Blue and John end up resolving their differences, somehow. Red and Dave briefly bond over their dumbass best friends being, well, dumbasses. They all part ways amicably.
somehow-or-other (idk yet) they end up running into each other a few more times, and eventually john invites them over to his place, and the four (plus Amy now!) get to know each other a little better
while there, Blue gets a text about some guy who's gonna die and John offers to drive them to where that's gonna go down. they take him up on the offer and get to have a bit of one-on-one conversation
after that ordeal though Blue has had Enough of people and bails, leaving John to head home alone
theres a sort of mirror-development going on with the five of em. Red, John, and Amy would all like everyone to get along, though theyre a bit tentative about it (John moreso than the other two, actually, jsut cause. well Red n Blue could still be Sauce Monsters). Dave and Blue on the other hand do Not like people enough for this shit, and Dave's not unconvinced theyre Sauce Monsters. he will not trust them until proven he should
the story's kinda nebulous but i got an idea for some Shit going down that involves both Sauce Monsters and also the Higher-Ups to have some fuckin absolute chaos go down.
Oops! All Trans
Everybody is transgender. Everyone
Ive actually workshopped this one both with ben (catgirlrepublic) and ghost (ghost-wannabe) lmao its a fun lil concept ive had from the get-go cause i mean. Whatâs an internet tran gonna do other than hit all their favourite media with the Everyoneâs Trans beam
Dave transitioned post-high school and faked his death for it. People go missing in Undisclosed all the damned time, after all. He moved to the next city over, transitioned fully, then came back as a completely new man. Yes i know this doesnt exactly fit with the âeveryone knows David from high schoolâ thing alright, hush.
Anytime anyone brings up Johnâs old best friend (pre-transition Dave) John throws an entire fit like an overdramatic grieving widow. Full-on sobbing âwhy would you bring her up?! I miss her so muchââ to the point that people just stop bringing up because Jesus Christ That Sure Is Uncomfortable KJHGFDS.
This is a scheme he and Dave came up with prior to Dave leaving, though Dave hadnt exactly anticipated John putting on this much of a performance about itâ but itâs stopped Dave from ever having tto hear his deadname again, so hey.
Amy transitioned sometime in middle school/early high school. Her family was super supportive and loved her a ton and most people just know her as Amy. she was super shy her whole life really so. Yeah. people just dont think to bring it up lmao also i Feel Like big jim would absolutely wallop anyone who gave her trouble of any kind
Johnâs nonbinary (genderfluid specifically) and not exactly Interested in transitioning ? like hes fine with how he is. mostly.
he came out to Dave in high school but hes not out to anyone else exactly. Maybe his bandmates. Probably any other trans person in Undisclosed knows, too, cause theyre safe to tell lmao. Johns mostly a âhe/him out of convenienceâ kinda nb whoâs cool with any pronouns but does prefer they/them most. Dave and Amy use they/them when the trio are alone
Also this is a totally self-indulgent caveat that i think would be great, Daveâs actually agender but because he's transmasc and transitioned when he thought there were really only two options, and being Boy at least felt less weird than being Girl, he just kind of assumed he was a dude. Itâs only through a lot of (like fucking years and years hes probably in his 30s/40s when he puts 2 and 2 together on this one) talks about gender with John that he realizes he actually feels like No Gender. Masc aesthetic with none gender.
I Just Think Itâd Be Neat Is All Okay
Also Amy came out to Dave about being trans early on in them seeing each other and his response was to get very nervous before blurting out âme tooâ and then just being too embarrassed to talk about it for the rest of the day. Hes got a lot of hangups on talking about it actually it takes years for him to get comfortable in that
by contrast when Amy comes out to John about it his response is to yell âEYYY ME TOOâ and give her a big ol hug lmao
I think itd be neatt if Amy ran a like. Transfem help/advice blog on tumblr. Kind of helped-with by John who can give her transfem nb insight for certain asks. I also just think that would be neat.
Cowboy AU - i put this one last cause its got drawings to it actually. Theyll be at the bottom
Basically just. Hey you ever watched a western. I think they look neat
This is another one me n ben have come up with lol
The soy sauce and all that shit still exist, im not sure where korrok fits in yet but ill figure it out
Theres no real like solid narrative yet ? but heres the barebones of everybodyâs arcs.
John
Johns an absolute troublemaker, Of Course. Hes wanted in several towns for absolutely stupid shit. Hes a loner who shows up, causes chaos, gets drunk, does some drugs, runs away if people get too mad at him
He definitely had the same kind of deal with the soy sauce as in canonâ he was at some kind of party, somebody offered it, he took it cause why the fuck wouldnt he, now he can see monsters and shit
Hes kind of a mooch also. Like. dont let him stay in your barn man heâll never fucking leave and drink all your booze.
He runs into Dave when they happen to just, cross paths in the same town. the bullshit John stirs up ends up involving Dave in a way that makes it seem like it's his fault too, and they both get run out of town
after that he just tags along after Dave. hes decided this guy's Cool he wants to stick around. Dave is pissed at first, but not enough to shoot him or anything, and eventually, John grows on him
Dave
Dave also is a loner but unlike John hes simply so fucking awkward and bad with people. He doesnt feel like he belongs anywhere so he just travels
Heâs the stereotypical Lone Ranger tbh. He wanders from town to town, solving their problems, though hed deny its out of any moral obligation (it kinda is, a little bit, tbh. He does like feeling useful). He shows up, fixes things, leaves. He's kind of a legend but most people think he's hiding something dark. other people jsut know him as that guy who farted real loud in the middle of the saloon and promptly skipped town out of sheer embarrassment. you know how it goes with Dave
He ends up involved with the Soy Sauce when a snake (not Actually a snake,) bites him. The snakeâs more like the wig-monsters, really. Anyway, it injects him with the soy sauce, he fucking trips balls in the middle of the desert, he can see monsters now
He runs into John and shit goes tits-up, as said, but they become traveling buddies after that. he'd never say so, but he's glad for the company, actually. it's nice. hes not used to companionship but he feels a strange kind of easiness hanging out with John....
not sure how the Monster Dave concept will like fit in to this reality but like. trust me i want it in here. I'll Figure It Out.
Amy
Amyâs been living in a town John and Dave end up passing through and she is very curious about these two new Handsome Strangers who claim to fight monsters and just kinda. Persistently tags along til they let her join for real
Her familyâs all dead, unfortunately, just like in canon, and sheâs been living alone for a few years before meeting John n Dave. she had nothing left in that town to stay for, she'd been fantasizing about escaping on wild adventures for a long time and this felt a little like a dream come true. (Dave still gives her a spiel about how Difficult it is, but really, her fantasies were pretty grounded-in-reality already. i jsut think thats how she is, yknow?)
Shes the first person to react to the whole âwe see monstersâ shit with a kind of âoh, okay. neatâ kind of response lmao
John and Dave fix whatever the fuck is up with her town (maybe thatâs where the Korrok shit can fit, who knows) and Amy ends up being integral to that. After, she insists they take her with them because âthey need her nowâ and Dave just cant really say no. John too is very much "the more the merrier!" and hes actually glad to have another person along he loves people lmao
At the start she has long hair but after she joins them she chops it short with a knife for convenience
also she still is an amputee. justt. idk. it was a wagon/stagecoach accident rather than a car accident lmao. just to clarify since i hadnt mentioned it, i wouldnt rob her of her ghost hand or yknow. all of the significance to her character that Missing A Hand has. although also now im going to have to research what was used as painkillers way-back-when, but im betting shes still got, like, her pain pills, they probably had those, maybe i wouldnt have to try too hard there. old timey medicine could be WACK though,
Shitload
Yeah hes in tthis shit mostly cause i liked designing his cowboy self lmao
Hes a kid (like 16, 17, technically i think in those days that was more Young Man than Kid but whatever. Hes Young i mean.) who got possessed by the Worms out in the desert and, by his familyâs perception, just went missing!
Hes also a wanderer, but he ended up at the same town john and dave met in, at that same time, and starts following them after, already aware of who/what they are.
He keeps his face covered 24/7. actually he covers a Majority of his self for reasons. kinda want him to be a slightly more horrifying Worm Entity rather than human idk,
I kinda dont have much for this boy yet sorry Shitload
images !
with some editing notes for me cause im doing a very specific aesthetic with this lmao. i might change some lil details/colours though ...... idk

im also kinda đ¤ about shitload's colour palette. i want things assoicated w the sauce to be black'n'red predominantly but i think his palette might mirror dave's too closely. also im working on a korrok design i jsut am too busy to draw it now
#jdate#john dies at the end#aus#erh. tthe hell do i tag this as#rambles.txt#long post#well let me know if youd wanna hear more or. or something#send an ask. or whatever#yaknow#:jazz hands:
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tumblr tag game
thank you so much for tagging me @fredy-carter â¤ď¸
1. Why did you choose your url?
after reading six of crows last year i absolutely fell in love with miss Nina Zenik so I had to have her as my url and we havenât parted ways since <3 (and this spelling was the closest canon i could get, whoever has nina-zenik saved i would love you forever if youâd grace me with it)Â
2. Any side blogs?
iâm a member at @dailybridgerton and besides that I have another main blog that i havenât updated in forever but itâs always funny to go back and see what i reblogged and posted as an edgy teen haha
3. How long have you been on tumblr?
i think i made my personal blog in 2011 and i created this one in 2013 but i wasnât always active on it
4. Do you have a queue tag?
only a âqâ because i canât be bothered typing out anything longerÂ
5. Why did you start your blog in the first place?
i dont even remember exactly to be honest but i think i just wanted to keep up with the fandoms i was in at the time and participateÂ
6. Why did you choose your icon/pfp?
sour has been playing 24/7 since it came out so it only made sense to have miss Olivia as my icon
7. Why did you choose your header?
i wanted something very simple with a quote that i love and this one resonated with me so much when i read crescent city
8. Whatâs your post with the most notes?
this text post which somehow reached 200k people despite only having bellarke as a hashtag lmaoÂ
9. How many mutuals do you have?
i have no idea to be honest since iâve been here so long, there are a lot of people that we donât even share fandoms with anymore but we still follow each other <3Â
10. How many followers do you have?
iâm almost at 2,9k which iâm incredibly grateful for <3Â
11. How many people do you follow?
372
12. Have you ever made a shit post?
i think half of my original posts here are shit posts lmao
13. How often do you use tumblr a day?
i basically open it anytime im bored and browse it like its the morning newspaper
14. Did you ever have a fight/argument with another blog?
yes lmao. but lately iâve been just blocking people instead of trying to argue, they arenât worth the energy
15. How do you feel about the âyou need to reblogâ posts?
as a gifmaker i completely agree that if you like something you should reblog it. none of us get paid to be here and create content, spend hours from our free time creating things, be it gifs, fanfics, fanart, playlists, icons, headers or anything else. and seeing 80%-20% like/reblog ratio can be really disheartening, so i understand why so many creators just gave up on it or lost motivation. for me the biggest motivator is seeing people reblog my creations because that means they liked it and while i dont make then for validation it still feels great to know that someone likes what you do so much that they want to show it to others as well. but of course no one has to reblog anything, and iâll never block anyone just for only liking something (which iâve seen some people do but i think its rather extreme)Â also if you really want to make someoneâs day just leave any personal message in the tags, i know i always check them and its an instant serotonin boost when someone say they really love a set
16. Do you like tag games?
yes, even if i forget to do them sometimes, but just know that if you tagged me at anything iâll love you forever
17. Do you like ask games?
i love them, itâs always great to talk to all of you who follow me <3
18. Which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?
all of you that get random anon messages, asking about your opinions, you are all celebrities in my eyes
19. Do you have a crush on a mutual?
crush? im in love with all of you jk
20. Tags!
@vanserrasvalkyrie @starbornvalkyrie @ladyvanserra @yazthebookish @teamnick @hopemikaelsson @tylorswft @starkkov @helion-ism @arielle-reads @catalinabaylors @oversizedbats @patel-dev and anyone who wants to do it <3Â
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Hi, my name is Brina... and Iâm a workaholic
As the above title states, my name is Brina and yes, I am a workaholic. I don't think of that as a bad thing since I enjoy the self-motivation and the feeling of accomplishment when I get tasks done. However, my boyfriend thinks that I should focus some of that time getting more hours of sleep, haha.Â
I attended Valley Central High school and graduated in 2017. High school was an okay experience, if I wasnât apart of the band program I feel that I would have disliked it more and would not have an interest in the things I do now. Iâm not trying to shit on the school, but I feel that it needed a deep cleanse on administration staffing and just an overall re-look on how to spend the funding. Just saying, I think the asbestos issue should have been handled before the  bleachers and locker rooms. But, not my problem anymore, Thank God.Â
When it came to deciding colleges and all that jazz, my high school was zero help in the whole process. Yes, they talked about it but at that age things should be more simplified to understand what needs to be done. Iâm 22 and I just finally figured out how to build up my credit score? Like, HELLO, start teaching kids about loans and all the other financial shit that goes into college. Not to mention the absolute lack of help I got when picking my major. I knew I wanted to go into the music or media industry and of course, none of my advisors had a clue what I was talking about. I decided on OCCC for the pricing and that cushion of still figuring out what I wanted to do. I attended SUNY Orange Fall of 2017 as a liberal arts: music emphasis major. Fast forward a year later to find out that they actually have a music program! Got to love the help advisors give you right? More so, the help wrong advisors give you. That following fall I was a full Music: Performing Arts major and loved every second of it. I met amazing, talented people that I am very glad to still be in touch with. When I was on my last semester and was on the edge of graduating I had the moment of âOh, God.. What the hell am I going to do after thisâ. I decided I wasn't ready to move on from SUNY Orange, since I had no idea what direction to go. I started looking into another major and that's when I found New Media! I was always interested on how content was made and what went into making a film. I remember my cousin and I used to make these little movie clips with the windows movie maker. We thought we were going to be these big movie-making hot shots at 8/9 years old haha.Â
I am grateful that I took my time with school and by the end of this OCCC journey I will be graduating next Fall with two A.A.S degrees and a clear idea of where I want to go.
Aside from anything media related Iâve been on this reading kick. Genres from fantasy, horror and some history. This summer my boyfriend and I got really into reading/collecting comic books! He has way more comics than I do but at least once a week weâre at Middletown Comics seeing what new issues came out! Now with the fall/Halloween season fast approaching I have been planning some great ideas for this year! I know I may catch a lot of eye-rolls/ mini-hate from those not wishing summer to be over but I canât wait for fall. Besides, halloween is everyday haha. Iâve been looking at Pinterest ideas on how to DIY some awesome decorations. I guess Pinterest is somewhat media related though? Ah well, since I'm back talking about it, I might as well talk about the last movie and TV show I watched. The last movie I watched was actually what had to be watched for COM 105. It was the 1995 movie Kids and uh.. it was definitely something haha. I understood the point of how it related to youth culture but I would not want to watch that movie again. As for the last TV show I watched, was again what I had to be watched for COM 105. It was Euphoria season 1 and that was a really good show. I know I only had to watch the first four episodes but I binged the whole season. The way the story was told was creative, I enjoyed the narrative back a forth style and how each character had their own stories. It made it worth getting a month of HBO Max. Â
Being on the topic of last things done, I suppose the next order is the last book/video game played or finished. The last book I finished was A Map of the Dark by Karen Ellis. I got that book from Thrill Club. Itâs basically a horror/thriller/anything dark and creepy book subscription. I canceled thrill club awhile ago and just now getting into the books I was sent. Anyway back to this book that I read. I found it a little empty. I just wanted more from it, it was very predictable and dry. I wanted more character depth, more suspense and just more of everything. The book is in the corner of my room at this moment because Iâm going to donate it, that's how unsatisfying it was to me. But HEY if anyone is interested in a dry thriller let me know! Haha. As for the last video game played it would have to be Assassins Creed Valhalla and that was a few weeks ago. I do love to game but when Iâm getting into a project or assignment, more of my focus goes into that rather than a video game. But my goal this semster is to take more time to myself and have self-care days, so Valhalla here I come!Â
Going down the âLastsâ list I have to my right here is, the last thing I created. Um, I guess the last thing I created was a make up look, that I will post a pic of at the bottom!  I do have ideas I wish to create such as uploading my podcast and YouTube videos! Im a really big planner so when it comes to things like that I want to have clear, organized agenda. I do have a date that I want things done and released so thereâs that! I will probably mention more of my podcast in future posts but for now things are in the works.Â
Which now brings us to the last thing of the âLastsâ list. Im sure there is a tongue twister in there somewhere but I donât have the brain capacity to think of one. My last meal on earth would have to be what I had for dinner last night. I ate cheese ravioli with a side of mozzarella sticks.Â
I know this assignment was supposed to be a minimum of 500 words and I believe I exceeded that. I look forward to these blog assignments since I can let my mind go and word things as if I was actually speaking. Well with a post this long I guess itâs safe to say I was ranting.Â
To future rants and of course the required MLA formatted references!Â

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astra, i feel like we donât know you at all!! say, can you tell us who is your most favorite character in obey me, and who is the least? love you â¤ď¸â¤ď¸â¤ď¸â¤ď¸
ok so THIS was difficult snxjms and as you asked afterwards, i also added why i feel this way way about them! love u đ sorry this turned out long tho
my list:
BELPHEGOR â i mean, itâs kinda obvious, right? (cough bbelphie is the name of the blog) ever since the start of the game, i wandered about who the fuck that resting bitch face boy was. like, honestly curious. when we met him at the attic, the first thing i thought about belphie was how manipulative he was, and although iâd have hated him, his situation and the gameâs universe in general made me reconsider my choice. i found out that he was so much more complex than what i first thought of him. and i LOVE characters like that. belphegor had his reasons, his own past and way of seeing things and i just wanted to know him better, not just because i was curious, but because iâve grown to like him, in a way. it wasnât instantaneous, but i kinda saw that coming, you know? iâm not sure if i can explain well how i feel about him (i canât express my feelings well in any way cof) but belphegor was the character that i was most eager to know about. (ouch i have so many other things to say about him) also heâs a sassy little shit and i love him for that.
MAMMON â the fact mammon was with us since the beginning is a big part of this place (but not the only one). and yeaaah, i know he was a little bitch about looking after mc and i was also blinded by my prejudice against personality based characters like him (narcissist, arrogant, show off) but then we get to know him better. mammon has so much more sides of his personality than that. (besides being a tsun tsun) so by that scene when we were competing against levi and lucifer saved us because mammon couldnât make it in time, mammon was like ânext time I will be the one saving you!!â i was already âYES YOU IDIOT I LOVE YOU TOOâ and it was just downhill from there.
SATAN â honestly? heâs my type. the intellectual one, cat lover, fan of mystery and detective books and all that shit made me fall for him, hard. and then i saw his backstory and i fell for him EVEN HARDER. he has sooo much i want to know about! behind the facade he wears constantly in front of everyone there was so much more than the sin heâs avatar of. his arc was one of the lessons i loved the most, without doubt. though i wished the devs had gone deeper into his character, like uhhh i donât know how to elaborate on this, but i feel we scratched only the surface of who satan really is. (besides that, satan def would be a beast in bed and my hcs about that doesât end)
LEVIATHAN â ahh it was too difficult to choose between him and beel. but i relate to levi quite a lot â animes, self depreciation, manga and all that stuff. he striked me as someone i wouldnât like so much at the beginning but iâve grown to love him. that was because of... well, i know envy is the deadly sin heâs avatar of, but man itâs annoying sometimes dnbfxk however! i love him either way. i just think that he should appreciate more things in life instead instead of putting himself down but who i am to talk? i used to be like that and i still am, just not as much. that must be most of the reasons of why i want to be by his side and reassure him that not everything in life is unfair, but can also be a way to make ourselves stronger. taking that emotional shit aside, i love his fanboy side!! i rant a lot about the things i like, especially animes and mangas, and seeing him so enthusiastic about things like that makes me feel like with him, i would act like myself the most.
BEELZEBUB â i love himbo!!! the giant, strong one that looks like he could kill you but is actually a cinnamon roll? yes, sign me the fuck in. heâs the sOFTEST i swear to god almost all the scenes that made my heart explode with love was with him. when he asked to hold your hand while sleeping because heâs afraid of having any more nightmares about lilith and belphie and their fall from the celestial realm made my heart go BOOM. i would do ANYTHING for this boy đđ beel was first i warmed up to in the game! i was gonna put him in the fourth place with levi but it would be too long.
LUCIFER â hhh this guys right here. ngl i was intimidated as fuck at first. but then i saw how he was family driven, always putting their safety and well being first and overall just being a loving brother, tho very discretely. and bruh characters like that are my DEATH??? he is so soft for the ones he loves and would do anything in his power to make them be safe and sound, even if it takes some sacrifices. i was touched by his past, how he had to hide so much from his brothers because he felt he should carry his burden alone. i especially love when lucifer tears off that prideful and powerful facade and shows that heâs capable of loving and being vulnerable and just idk man it just hits home im gonna cry
ASMODEUS â baby boy. lusty boy. ntt solmare did him dirty. he deserves SO MUCH MORE!! asmo has so much potential to be a favorite if only they had developed him better. that arc of his when we make a pact with him was lacking, in my opinion. the devs could have gone deeper into his character, showing that his not just a personification of lust, only its avatar. iâm sure there are different sides to his personality, you know? weâve been seeing hints throughout the story and devilgrams (most of the time theyâre very subtle!!) that asmo needs or/and constantly wants to feel loved, wanted, desired and/or admired. that could be a trauma or something of the sort that was created after his fall from the celestial realm. however this theory of mine is not full developed yet so i canât really tell you guys about it in more detail. i still love him nevertheless!!
others characters:
SOLOMON â he is shady. and powerful. i love that. besides that, i think i may have a thing for white haired characters. but really, i love this guy, donât know how but i do. thereâs a lot i wanna know about him, and i feel heâs hiding or planning something big. and maybe evil. but ngl his interactions with asmo are the best!!
SIMEON â ara ara baby. iâm 100% in love with him. simeon is someone really good to have as a favorite honestly. even if he doesnât get much screentime, anyone would realize that ever since the beginning heâs a very truthful person, with calming and chill vibes. i donât know how to explain it well but with all the shit the brothers make mc go through, it wouldnât be a surprise if you find yourself overwhelmed, and simeon is exactly the kind of person that makes you feel heard and seen; his atmosphere has this effect of making people feel at ease.... cough cough anyways a little bit nsfw but to me heâs either really kinky (without noticing or even knowing anything about kinks) or super innocent. thatâs pretty much why iâve seen this 50/50 aspect appearing constantly with his stans. p.s: not to be lewd but i wanna hold his hand đł
LUKE â heâs my baby brother. i adopted him.
DIAVOLO â thereâs so much of this guy we havenât seen yet!! i know heâs like a cool dad and all but bruh, heâs the next demon king!! he must be a excelent strategist and is more powerful and intelligent than he lets on. i saw so many theories about diavolo, but my favorite so far is the one where diavolo kinda caused the celestial war indirectly. heâs another character that i feel weâve only scratched the surface.
BARBATOS â everything about him screams âSUSPICIOUSâ, he just hides it better than solomon. ngl i was rly curious about him and his powers and then i discovered he has control over TIME?? thatâs too overpower!! but damn, i do love characters with time control powers...(victor from mlqc im looking at you) sometimes he looks like a dead fish. sometimes he looks hot. i donât know bruh iâm half scared and half aroused by this guy.
thatâs pretty much it i think? lmao thereâs so much more i wanna say about them but this is all that comes to my mind right now!
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Bad Influence - Chapter 11
Word Count - 5.4K
Authors Note - It's been a while! đđť About 4 months I think đŹ If there are any Bad Influence fans actually left out there, I'm so sorry & I love you. I had a really fuckin shitty last few months of 2019 & because of that, I kinda stopped doing the stuff I enjoy, writing this fanfic & using this blog being one of them.
Then I tried to come back before I was ready đ I wrote this chapter out about 2 months ago, but never bothered to post it bcos I didn't care enough about it. But I've recently returned to it, rewrote it & remembered why I fuckin love writing this fanfic. So I'm super excited to post this chapter & I hope you don't all hate it after how long it's been đ It's a bit rough bcos I'm getting back into it & I'm kinda rusty!
I love you guys for baring with me, I can't wait to get back into writing this fic for you đ¤
Warnings - Um, the f word is used in like every sentence oops, some implied smut when Nikki is remembering (choking trigger warning), I guess 'violence' but not really violence???, a whole lot of angst & a teeny bit of fluff at the end
Tags - @cruecifymesixx @freddiessmallnipples @queen-crue @scarecrowmax @lovesick-heart0 @littlesunnymoon @80sheart-strings @cranberrirolls @inthebackofmycarlaytheirbodies @versnatasha @zoenicolesetser @crazysaladchopshop @ggorehorror @lunamadhatter99 @justtryingtoovercome @chaoticvybe @you-know-im-a-dreamer @eightiesrockbaby @valentines-in-london @xrosegoldwolfx @fupatroopaa @lilypetite88 @this-blog-must-be-the-place @ashleecrue @lauravic @dark-princess99 @unknownoblivion @mgkobsessed @antheasnow @rockaholi @nassauartist @sparxx27
(there's one bit where Nikki is glaring across the bar at a character & this gif is spot on)
*Nikkis POV*
I drummed my fingers to the sound of a guitar as I watched Mick do his thing through the glass of the recording booth, his fingers working magic as he played the riff to Looks That Kill.
Fuck, that weird little guy could play.
âNikki, this song is gonna fucking kill!â Tommy yelled enthusiastically, beating his drumsticks on the arm of the battered couch his was lounging on.
I smiled weakly back at him, my nerves keeping me from matching his excitement. âI hope so,â I mumbled. I look around the studio, basking in the enormity of where we were right now. MĂśtley was recording their second album & my nerves were shot. It had to be perfect. It had to do well.
âStop stressing man, everyoneâs gonna fucking freak over this album, I just know it!â He replied, smiling encouragingly, his usual Tommy level of positivity feeling sickeningly sweet, but still, I nodded at him gratefully. âSo we hitting up The Whisky or what tonight boys?â He continued, addressing Vince as well as me, who was pouting on the couch next to him.
I chuckled without amusement, shaking my head. âFuck no, not a chance Iâm going in there yet.â
Tommy scowled at me. âSixx, come on dude, you cant avoid the place forever. Plus, she might not even be working tonight!â
âIâm not risking it! Iâm not gonna be able to enjoy the night if sheâs there, judging my every fucking move, you know how she is.â I replied, rolling my eyes.
âSo youâve still not talked to her since..â Tommy trailed off, awkwardly. But Vince happily picked up from where heâd left off.
âSince you lead her on, fucked her & then blew her off?â He snapped arrogantly, instantly causing my jaw to tense.
âDonât fucking start with me, Vinny. Iâm not in the mood.â
âOh, you mean you don't wanna hear about what a dick you were? What a surprise.â The sarcasm thick in his voice.
I slammed my hand down on the recording table & stood up sharply. âThe fuck is your problem, man?â I snarled, his attitude & the mounting stress from the album mixing together to create a dangerous cocktail of anger & belligerence.
âMy problem?â He questioned, standing up to meet my stare. âMy problem is you Sixx. Beths a good fucking girl, what you did was real messed up, I should fucking floor you again for how you treated her. You owe the chick an apology at the goddamn least.â He spat, his anger in Beths defence honourable, but fucking irritating.
I chuckled arrogantly at his misplaced valiance. âGive it up the knight in shining armour act Vinny, I didnât see you rushing to commit to her when she was getting your dick wet.â
I saw the danger flash in his eyes as he took a warning step towards me. âI didnât fuck her & leave either.â He hissed, the venom in his voice palpable.
âAw, did I upset your girlfriend?â I joked patronisingly, very aware that I was pushing it too far, but yet I couldnât help myself, Vince acting all high & mighty was really starting to piss me off.
Vinces eyes narrowed sharply & I saw his hands ball into fists at his side. âLike I said, sheâs a good girl. She didnât deserve that.â He said through his teeth, the strain to keep calm evident in his voice.
I smirked at him amused, looking him up & down. âWhatcha gonna do Vince? Hit me again? Defend her honour? Sheâs a chick dude & a stuck up one at that. And she ditched your ass if you remember, you should be thanking me.â I laughed, shrugging.
âYou know what Sixx, youâre an asshole. You know as well as I do that Beth isnât another fucking groupie to this band. Nah, I didnât wanna date her, but I like her- We all like her.â He corrected himself quickly.
âVinnyâs right man, Iâm not taking sides, but Beths cool & I kinda do like having her around!â Tommy piped up, nodding.
âFuck off T-Bone, you only want her around because you know as soon as she goes, so does your uptight piece of ass.â I shot at him, my frustration with the pair of them growing at a dangerous rate.
âDude câmon, thereâs no need..â
I cut Tommy off viciously. âWhat the fuck has happened to this band?!â I shouted, shoving Vince out of my face. âSince when do we give this much of a fuck about chicks?! Look at where we are?!â I gestured around the recording studio. Mick had stopped playing & had casually lit a cigarette as he watched us bickering through the sound-proof glass. âThis is whatâs important. Now Iâm going for a fucking smoke, this conversation is done & when I come back in weâre gonna record a fucking album, got it?!â
I barged out of the studio, flicked open my lighter & sparked up my cigarette, leaning back against the wall as I took in a shaky drag, my anger still surface level. I exhaled & closed my eyes, feeling the May sun warm my face & start to melt my mood away.
What was everyoneâs fuckinâ obsession with this girl?!
Yeah she was cool, but sheâs still a chick. And chicks = trouble.
I let my mind wander back to the look she gave me as she lay beneath me, my hand around her throat as she came undone & smirked to myself as I lifted the cigarette back to my smug lips. She was so worth the chase.
But Christ, Iâm supposed to feel bad because I donât want all that cutesy shit afterwards? No. Beth knew me, weâd had enough arguments about the kinda guy I am, she did this to herself. Not my fault that she thought she meant anything more to me than any one of those other girls. She was a fuck. A good fuck. But a fuck nonetheless.
I took another drag as the image of Beth sat in her bed with that stung look on her face snuck its way involuntarily into my mind. I could see those hurt tears & hear her bitter words ordering me to leave. I couldnât help the pang of guilt in my stomach that accompanied the image.
Sheâs a fuckinâ chick, Nikki. Chicks = trouble, I recited to myself, rubbing my face roughly with my hands, almost in hope that I could scrub away the memory of her pained face. Get over it man, itâs done.
I sharply exhaled the last of my smoke before throwing it aggressively to the floor, somehow more frustrated than I was before.
Time to go record a fuckinâ album.
*Later*
*Beths POV*
I smoothed out the material of the tiny black dress I was wearing as I pouted my lips at my reflection in the mirror, appreciating the sight of myself all dolled up & ready to forget all about Nikki fucking Sixx.
I flashed an all too familiar looking smirk at myself before I spun around of my sky high heels & strutted out of the ladies bathroom & back over to Sophia who was waiting at the bar, two drinks in hand. She winked at me as I got closer, holding out one of the glasses for me to take.
âGirl, you look unreal! If we werenât here trying to pull for you, Iâd take you home right now,â she laughed, nudging me & winking again.
I let out a laugh as I took a swipe at her arm, âI am not here trying to pull!â I insisted, not even managing to fool myself. Itâd been a little over a week since I went from the all time high of fucking Nikki to the crashing low of realising I meant nothing to him in a matter of minutes & Iâd laid around feeling sorry for myself ever since. Well, not tonight. I was gonna find a guy & I was gonna remind myself what a goddamn catch I am.
âOh Beth, thereâs a reason youâre wearing that dress tonight & girl, it ainât for the coverage,â she giggled as I took another playful swipe. âHey, thereâs no judgements here! Iâd want a good lay after the emotional rollercoaster that has been Nikki Sixx!â
I raised my eyebrows at her as she quickly mimed locking her lips. âSorry, sorry, we donât mention that name, my bad.â
I shook my head. âItâs fine, Iâm over it,â I lied. âBut, if a cute guy wants to buy me a drink & maybe show me a good time, Iâm not gonna say no.â I shrugged as we both burst into a fit of giggles, before I took a long sip of the very strong cocktail.
âWell that sounds like my queue.â Came a smooth voice from behind me. I turned to face the handsome stranger who was stood leaning casually against the bar, eyebrow cocked as his eyes scanned up & down my body, drinking in the sight of me. âYou have excellent timing.â I blushed, appreciating his good looks right back. He was classically good looking, with blonde hair & a chiselled jaw, dressed smart in a shirt that hugged his toned physique & muscular arms just enough to spark a little intrigue as to what lay underneath. He was the exact opposite to Nikki in every physical way. Where Nikki was unruly & unkept, this guy was clean shaven & well groomed. He wore no leather or studs & his smile was friendly & genuine, not smug & he wasnât dripping in arrogance.
âIâm Daniel.â He introduced himself, holding out a hand for me to shake. I looked into his electric blue eyes & blushed once again.
âBeth, itâs nice to meet you.â I replied as smoothly as I could.
â& Iâm Sophia, but I guess no-one asked,â she piped up mockingly, winking at me. âNow Dan, unless youâve got a cute, single friend for me, Iâm gonna get outta your way & go for a dance.â Soph smirked, grabbing her drinking & flouncing off towards the dance floor, blowing us a kiss as she did.
We both let out a laugh. âShe seems great,â Daniel said as I nodded, taking a sip of my drink. âShe mentioned something about an emotion rollercoaster though? I hope Iâm not stepping on anyoneâs toes?â He queried.
I swallowed my drink before letting out a little laugh. âNot at all, there are no toes to be stepping on, donât worry.â
âWell good, Iâm glad. Iâm surprised though, a gorgeous girl like you doesnât have a man. Youâre sure thereâs no-one, because you seem way too good to be true!â He flirted, as I laughed
âOh youâre smooth.â I teased, âbut no, thereâs absolutely no-one.â I answered, pushing any & all thoughts & feelings I might have towards Nikki Sixx out of my mind.
*Little later*
âWow, so youâre a doctor?â I asked, impressed.
Daniel laughed, shaking his head. âI wish! Iâm a med student currently, but thatâs the hope one day.â
âWhat made you wanna get into medicine then?â
He paused for a second, his warm smile faltering for a brief moment & I sensed his hesitation to answer. âI, um, lost my dad when I was younger. Spent a lot of time in hospitals with him when he got sick. I remember watching all these doctors around me taking care of people, helping, curing.. They seemed like superheroes to me back then. After we lost my dad, I knew I wanted to help people, be one of those people that kids could look up to in the same way I did, yanno?â
I nodded, smiling at his compassion & genuineness.
âSorry, bit heavy for a first meet, I know.â He laughed awkwardly.
âNot at all!â I replied, âI asked the question, you just answered it honestly, I appreciate that.â
As Daniel carried on talking about his studies, I couldnât help but admire him. THIS was the kinda guy I was supposed to end up with. Smart, hot as hell, a brilliant career ahead of him, goals, aspirations.. He was exactly the kinda man I could take home to my father. Daniel was everything I should want & he was actually interested in me.
And yet, I still felt that unwanted & yet infuriatingly all-to-familiar flame ignite the second I heard his voice drift over from the bar.
âJack & coke please darlinâ.â
Nikkis voice hit me like a slap in the face & rush desire all at once & I immediately froze, my body unsure how to react to my contrasting emotions.
âAre you ok?â Daniel asked, reaching out & touching my arm, concern written across his face. I flinched as his touch, still lost somewhere in Nikkis voice, & snatched my arm away instinctively.
âIâm sorry, I didnât mean to-â Started Daniel, his concern look now laced with panic.
âN-no, its fine honestly, its not you, its just..â I drifted off, briefly glancing behind me, trying to pin a location on the voice. My eyes caught sight of the four of them standing at the bar, waiting on their drinks. Nikki was dressed in his usual leather trousers, torn at the knees, & combat boots & a torn up shirt. His hair almost appeared messier than usual & he had a cigarette hanging from his lips. He couldnât have been more different from the sharp, handsome man sat opposite me.
Daniel followed my line of sight & spotted the literal motley crew. Nikki was already hitting on the bar maid, distracting her whilst Tommy & Vince reached over & stole a bottle from behind the bar; all whilst Mick stood by, watching disapprovingly & swigging from his trademark flask.
âYou know them?â Daniel asked hesitantly.
âNope.â I replied bluntly, snapping back to reality & turning back to him. âI fancy getting out of here though, you wanna head back to mine, continue the drinking there?â
Daniel looked a little taken a back at the upfront offer as I stood up & downed the last of my drink, but I was fairly certain he wouldnât refuse. I didnât care either way at this point, I just needed out of here.
âUm sure-â
âGreat, Iâll go find Sophia..â
âSheâs over there, talking to those guys you apparently donât know.â Dan stated, his tone now flat & a little judgemental as he raised an eyebrow at me.
âLook, Daniel, I donât wanna get into it, but its better we just leave.â I said, hoping to avoid any questions, but his face was growing more unimpressed by the second. âIâve really enjoyed getting to know you Dan, ok? But I canât be here right now, so I gotta go. Iâd, um, Iâd like you to join me.. If you want to, of course. I mean, you donât have to..â I mumbled, suddenly very aware & embarrassed by how he must be viewing me in that moment.
I saw his eyes narrow at my discomfort &, Iâm assuming against his better judgement, he nodded & stood up to join me. âIâm not sure whatâs happening here, but Iâve enjoyed getting to know you too & maybe you could fill me in on why youâre running away over that drink at yours?â He asked, a little suspicious but friendly. I nodded, giving him a small smile.
We started towards the exit when I felt a pair of hands snake around my waist & lift me excitedly into the air. I squealed in shock & suprise as Tommy span me around before placing me back on my feet.
âBeth! I cant believe you guys are here, whatâre the chances? Soph said you came here to avoid us & we came here because Sixx wanted to avoid you! How fuckinâ funny is that?â He said, roaring with laughter, his hand resting on his stomach as he struggled to regain control on his amusement.
âTommy.â I said sternly, shooting him a look that told him to shut the hell up. He quickly stood up straight, coughing a little to hide his laughter, before glancing over towards Daniel.
âHey, whoâs this? Iâm Tommy dude, how ya doing?â He said, offering out his hand enthusiastically.
âDaniel, Iâm good man, howâre you?â He answered, accepting the handshake hesitantly.
âIâm good? Hey, you wanna come meet the rest of the guys?â Tommy offered enthusiastically, without a second thought as to why that might not be such a good idea.
âActually T-Bone, weâre just heading out.â I replied sharply, giving him another warning look.
âOk, ok,â he laughed, holding his hands up in defeat as he got the hint. âIt was nice to meet you man!â Tommy smiled at Dan, who nodded awkwardly back to him before T-Bone practically bounced back over to the bar.
âDonât know them huh?â Daniel asked, his voice oozing with sarcasm suddenly, making me cringe.
âIâm sorry, theyâre just.. A lot, ok?â I tried to explain, frustrated, mainly with myself.
âWhatâs the deal with this one?â Asked Dan, gesturing towards Nikki, who was leaning against the bar, sipping on his Jack & coke, his eyes fixed coldly on he two of us.
âThatâs the, um.. Emotional rollercoaster.â I answered sheepishly, coughing to distract from my amounting discomfort, whilst simultaneously avoiding the eyes of both Nikki & Dan.
âRight.. Well, your rollercoaster is on his way over here.â
Fuck.
I glanced up to see Nikki, in all his arrogance, strolling towards us, his usual smirk fixed in place.
âIâm so sorry for whatever he says.â I quickly whispered to Dan, before Nikki came to a stop in front of us. I watched his eyes scan up & down Daniel, obvious sizing him up without an ounce of subtlety, before he turned his attention to me.
âLeaving without introducing us, Lizzy?â He drawled, the pretension thick in his voice.
âYes Nikki, I am. So if youâd like to move-â
He cut me off, his focus back on Daniel. âIâm Nikki Sixx,â he stated, without the courtesy of a handshake.
âDaniel,â Dan replied, flatly, seemingly glad there was no extended hand to shake.
âAnd how do you know the lovely Lizzy here, Dan?â Nikki asked, his smirk never once faltering.
âWe just met tonight, but weâre justing heading back to hers, if you donât mind.â Dan replied simply, taking my hand.
âOh but you see, I do mind.â Nikki stated bluntly, his smile as wide as it was dark as he side stepped back in front of Dan who had tried to manoeuvre round him. âLizzy here is what we like to call a groupie & we,â he gestured towards the rest of the band behind him, âdonât particularly like sharing.â
âOh fuck you, Sixx.â I scoffed, my face growing hot with a mix of anger & embarrassment. I turned to look at Dan, cringing at his raised eyebrow & gave him an apologetic look. âDonât listen to him, heâs just being an asshole, Iâm not a groupie.â
âReally?!â Nikki replied, dragging out the word dramatically as his shit eating grin somehow managed to grow wider. âBecause I remember fucking you about a week ago & my boy Vince over there,â he pointed to at the very pissed off looking lead singer, âswears he remembers fucking you not long before that? Or are with both mistaken? I mean, there are a lot of you girls, you do all kinda look the same.. Feel the same too.â He chuckled darkly, shooting me a sly look. I glared at him with an expression so deadly that dared him to carry on. He rose to the challenge. âI tell you what though buddy,â Nikki continued, leaning into Dan so he was speaking into his ear, but just loud enough for me to catch what he was saying, âif youâre heading back to hers youâre in for a treat. Sheâs got the mouth of a motherfuckinâ Angel.â He finished, glancing over at me & winking. I was prepared to fly at him in a blind rage, fists balled, ready to wipe that smug smile off of his face permanently, when Dan spoke up, in a voice so peaceful & gentle, that it made his words seem somehow harsher.
âYou are an arrogant piece of shit. Iâve been sat with this girl for the last hour & I spend a minute in your presence & itâs immediately clear to me that sheâs way too good for you. But Iâm sure sheâll realise that in her own time.â Daniel turned back to me, his expression stoney & irritated, but I could swear there was a hint of sympathy in his eyes. âIf you ever get off of this rollercoaster doll, you know where you can find me.â He said, letting go of my hand as he stepped around the unmoving Nikki.
âDaniel, wait..â I caught him by the arm & quickly stepped in his path, stopping him.
âBeth, you seem like a great girl & I donât think Iâve ever hit it off so quickly with someone like I have with you. But itâs obvious you have something with that guy & Iâm not really interested in competing with him for your attention.â
I nodded slowly, knowing his words were fair. âIâm sorry.â
âItâs ok. And I mean it, if you decide to get off the rollercoaster.. I can probably offer you a slightly calmer ride. A carousel maybe?â Dan winked, laughing as I let out a light giggle. His blue eyes focused on mine, sending a surge of electricity through my body that momentarily extinguished the flame that Nikki somehow always managed to light. I lifted my lips & placed them softly on Daniels for the briefest second, before pulling away.
âThank you.â I whispered.
His eyes lingered on my lips for a second, silently asking for more, before he came back to reality & gave me a genuine smile. âIt was nice to meet you Beth. I do hope I get to see you againâ, he nodded, before kissing my cheek & heading for the door.
I stood still for a second, gathering my thoughts & regaining my composure, before walking towards the bar where the CrĂźe & Sophia were stood, trying to act as if they hadnât been watching.
I had barely made it over to them before Nikki was straight in there with his sly comments, immediately trying to get under my skin.
âAw was Prince Charming not happy to hear the Princess was actually a band slu-â
Nikki didnât get the chance to finish his insult. He was silenced by the remainder of my drink soaking him as I threw it at him furiously, dousing his arrogance with my cocktail.
âThat is for thinking you have any right to chase away a good guy just because your petty, selfish ass is jealous.â I spat. âAnd this..â
The loud crack of my hand slapping him sharply across the face echoed around the bar, followed by the whooping of Vince & Tommy. I even caught a glimpse of Mick smirking.
Nikki recoiled, his hand flying to his crimson cheek, shock & fury on his face. But his rage couldnât match mine. I grabbed his face roughly, my hand cupping his chin & cheeks, forcing him to meet my wrathful glare.
âThat is for fucking me & leaving me like I was one of your whores.â I seethed, my voice quiet & dangerous.
Nikkis face went from white hot anger to an ice cold stare in an instant as he straightened up, pushing me off of him as he did. He took a step towards me, but I didnât move an inch. I was way too fucking angry to back down.
âListen Princess, youâre fucking lucky Iâm not a bad guy-â he began, but my sharp laugh rang loud, cutting him off.
âNot a bad guy?! Nikki, are you really that delusional?! Youâve done nothing but purposely fuck with my head from the day I met you. Youâve insulted me, dragged me down to your level, used me, screwed my chances with two different guys & for what?!â I screamed, tears threatening to form. âNo, you know what?! You're fucking lucky Sixx, Iâm not gonna do this here. Iâm done. I donât want anything to do with you.â
I span around, ready to make my dramatic exit, when I came face to face with a very happy looking band manager, Doc. He clearly couldnât care less about our drama as he marched over to us like nothing was happening.
âBartender, a round of shots for these boys & their girlfriends. We need to celebrate;â
âThe fuck are you talking about Doc?â Snapped Nikki, his eyes still fixed on me.
âBoys, youâre in!" He announced, unable to hide his obvious pleased-with-himself smirk "I've just been told that MĂśtley CrĂźe have been offered a last minute slot to play alongside the likes of Judas Priest, Scorpions, Van Halen & The Prince of fucking Darkness, Ozzy fucking Osbourne at the US Festival on Memorial Day weekend!â Doc exclaimed, laughing as the band began shouting & whooping, looking disbelieved & excited as hell. Choruses of âare you serious?!â & âyouâre fucking kidding!â weâre passed between them as Doc reassured them that they were on their way up.
In that moment, watching these guys Iâd grown to love over the last couple of years get the break they worked so hard for, I couldnât be mad. I watched as Tommy jumped on Nikkis back, Vince hugged Doc & Mick silently smirked to himself. They deserved this.
Doc handed me & Sophia a shot as we congratulated them all, although I couldnât quite bring myself to share my enthusiasm with Nikki. But he was too busy to notice as he held up his shot glass in a toast.
âTo us! Weâve got an old man, a kid drummer, a cover band singer & a fucking run away. Win it all or loose it all, weâre MĂśtley fucking Crue!â He yelled, his excitement & energy almost infectious, as much as I wanted to hate him.
âTo you guys!â Sophia cheered, laughing as we all downed our shots.
âLetâs get another round in, weâre celebrating! And pour one for yourself gorgeous.â Vince called to the barmaid who was more than happy to oblige, blushing as he winked at her, turning on the Vince Neil charm that would assure sheâd be going home with him at the end of the night. I remember that well, I chuckled to myself.
The atmosphere of the night had changed so dramatically from what it was 10 minutes previously, everyoneâs anger & awkwardness forgotten in the wake of such elating news. I looked around all the happy faces; Vince flirting with the bar maid, Tommy all over a giggling Sophia, Mick & Doc eagerly discussing set lists & felt an overwhelming sense of misplacement. After all that had happened, I just couldnât bring myself to match their enthusiasm, not tonight.
I noticed Nikki's gaze focused on me, his face betraying his now obvious guilt as he watched me stand alone, uncomfortable & upset. His sudden success had clearly snapped him out of his petty, jealous mood.
Uninterested in an apology from him, I let my eyes continue to scan the room, looking anywhere but at him, when Sophia glanced over, catching my eye & gestured for me to join in. I forced my best smile as I walked over to her & Tommy.
âTake another shot Reynolds!â Tommy shouted, pushing a shot glass of mysterious liquid at me. I laughed politely as I shook my head.
âThanks, but no thanks T-Bone. I think Iâm actually gonna shoot yanno, Iâm getting pretty tired.â I lied.
âBeth, donât leave, please?â Tommy pleaded, his face suddenly serious, moving away from Soph & towards me.
âT-Bone, itâs not a big deal honestly, you guys enjoy your celebrations!â
âJust talk to him. I know the fucker doesnât deserve it, Beth, I know. But he cares for you more than you think, I promise. We all do.â He added, placing his hand in mine & giving it a squeeze as he flashed me a goofy half smile.
I gave him a half smile & squeezed his hand back. âI know Tommy & I love you guys, I really do. But I canât be around him, its.. itâs too hard.â I muttered back, so quietly it was almost inaudible above the music playing in the bar. But Tommy caught it.
âYou care for him too, donât you?â He asked, just as quietly.
I nodded, my eyes filling with tears. âGod knows why T-Bone, heâs made it clear he doesnât care about me. Iâm just another girl he fucked.â I sniffed, furiously wiping away my tears before anyone noticed.
âBeth, Sixx is a dick. Iâve watched him fuck over chick after chick who was convinced theyâd tame him & he tosses them without a second thought. But not you. I donât know what the fuck goes on in Nikkis head, but that fucker cares about you. So please, donât ditch us all just because you think he doesnât.â
âIâm sorry Tom, I know heâs your friend & you wanna see the best in him, but youâre wrong. Nikki Sixx only cares about himself.â I replied, straightening my posture & regaining my composure. I pulled Tommy into a tight hug & congratulated him again. âIâll see ya around T-Bone, Iâm sure.â I winked, gesturing towards Sophia.
He laughed, âIâll look after her.â
I blew him a kiss before heading towards the door, not wanting to disturb anyone elseâs night with my drama.
âLizzy, wait up.â I heard Nikkis voice call. I closed my eyes briefly, choosing whether to stop or keep going. I chose the latter & walked swiftly out of the door, pretending I hadnât heard.
But my ignorance was in vain & he was right behind me, following suit out of the bar.
âNikki please, just go back-â
My sentence was cut short by his lips crashing onto mine. I froze, feeling anger, lust & passion sweep through my body as my brain tried to compute the correct emotional response. I pushed him away sharply, deciding anger overwhelmed any feelings I had towards him.
âWhat the fuck do you think youâre doing?! Are you asking for another slap?!â
âLizzy, Iâm sorry ok?â He blurted out, clearly uncomfortable with apologies.
âYouâre sorry?! Oh, well that makes everything ok then.â I said sarcastically, rolling my eyes at him.
âI know ok, I fucked up. Iâve been a dick to you & Iâm sorry. I just, I donât know how to do this shit.â He mumbled, running his hands through his tangled hair.
âDo what, Sixx?â My frustration mounting with his half-assed apology.
âI donât fucking do.. This.â He gestured between the two of us, struggling to find his words.
I sighed with exasperation. âWhat is this Nikki? Is this an apology or what, because honestly there isnât much you can say right now, just let me go home.â I finished, turning to leave, but he caught hold of my hand, pulling me into him. He placed his hand gently under my chin, bringing my face up to his.
âI donât do this, ok? I donât do feelings or relationships, fuck, I wonât even sleep with a girl twice.â He laughed, before clearing his throat when he saw my unamused expression. âLizzy, I am sorry, I didnât mean to hurt you. I got pissed as hell when I saw you with that fucking pretty boy, I snapped.. I don't know, I guess I was kinda jealous.. I do care about you.â
I scoffed. âYouâve got a funny way of showing it.â
âI do, Lizzy. But listening to you telling me why Iâm a bad guy, all the shit Iâve done to you, youâre right. And Iâm sorry. Just, please donât leave. Come celebrate with us, we all want you here. I want you here.. Youâve been with us from the start, it wouldnât feel the same without you. You mean a lot to me... Um, to us. You mean a lot to us.â He corrected.
I looked into his green eyes & saw the sincerity, noted the lack of arrogance in his voice & the absence of his usual smug smile. I so badly wanted to give into him. I wanted to taste his kiss again, melt against him like I always do. I wanted to take his hand & go back inside, enjoy the night with the band, drink, have fun & fall into bed with him when the night was over.
But Iâd fell for Nikkis sweeter side before, I knew how the night would end. Heâd leave afterwards & Iâd be hurt all over again. And I wasnât gonna let that happen.
âNo Nikki, Iâm sorry.â
#motley crue#motley crue fanfic#motley crue fanfiction#motley crue fandom#motley crue imagine#the dirt fanfic#the dirt fanfiction#the dirt fandom#the dirt imagine#nikki sixx#nikki sixx fanfic#nikki sixx fanfiction#nikki sixx fandom#nikki sixx imagine#vince neil fanfic#vince neil fanfiction#vince neil fandom#vince neil imagine#tommy lee fanfic#tommy lee fanfiction#tommy lee fandom#tommy lee imagine#mick mars fanfic#mick mars fanfiction#mick mars fandom#mick mars imagine#vince neil#tommy lee#mick mars
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tw: depressive/anxiety talk, suicidal thoughts
its 2:42 am while im writing this, because i cant sleep.
i thought distracting myself enough during the day through working on cosplays and watching youtube videos would help, but after a while it starts to become repetitive enough for my mind to start wandering. specifically to what led me to try and force myself to fixate on it as a distraction in the first place.
a lot of the babbling is going to be weird nonsense that only close friends of mine will get, or people who have no business being on my blog. you know who you are.
the last week has been me dealing with feelings of abandonment, anxiety, and depression. all drifting into an overall feeling of helplessness. not as bad, but feeling just as bad as when a very close friend had ghosted me in late 2018. not as intimidate either, woof, but still bad.Â
i spoke up about one of my many feelings about a particular fandom issue in a way that got me into completely avoidable controversy by those who wanted to think ill of me. i was then baited into a spotlight of purposeful humiliation in front of people i either respected, tolerated, or have had the willingness to support thru my own wallet.Â
i left the space due to not wanting to be further witch trialed, after already previously put in a panic due to things being dealt with in a less than mature light. my heart was racing, i had to go to work, and i kept trying to keep from tearing up at the wheel.
the conflict was stuff destined to build up. stuff unspoken about due to the unwillingness to solve issues early on and to make things easy on everyone involve. and in return, ive found a similar pattern that i have with many online situations; tolerant relationships to unspoken beefs, an eventual boiling point, and separation.
i think the thing that stings the most is that if anyone of witness to said spotlight thought of it to be too far, that im certainly not being assured that my relationships arenât forever poisoned. that anyone is at my side or willing to speak up about how bad things are versus sweeping it under the rug like it never happened. i havent really had anyone directly a witness to it talk to me since. not that they have to, but it makes a situation feel less ignored, or eerily erased. less salt to a wound of previously short responses and ignored conversation from those (some) who enabled abuses of power.
good ol homestuck drama.
(i also keep getting accused of chasing for clout due to not being drastically defensive about sharing a space with others, but thatâs its own thing.)
the night after, fitting enough, i got into a fight with my mom over something that didnât call for dramatics. a very similar theme: she spoke over me, blamed me for things in a blatant form of manipulative psyche play, and threatened to kick me out of the space. after, i left the house during the warning of tornadoes to be by myself, and eventually stayed at a kind friendâs place. i cried and drove with a dead phone battery hoping to run into something by freak accident for the sake of not having to deal with the now. i dont think it was a panic attack? i wouldnât know.Â
a few days after, she asked me to help with groceries.
like nothing happened.
i asked my dad about it, and he was very centrist in his ideals and talked about what i should do better versus at all acknowledging the wrongs of my mom.
this is a theme that keeps happening.
i feel like this is always going to keep happening, bc these issues arenât the firsts. i feel that if i keep attempting to go about my business in a space that somethingâs always going to come up regardless of how serious the situation actually is. and that someone is going to be out there waiting for me to slight them in some minimalist way to call fault while others know and do nothing.
the home life makes me feel like im no where close to leaving the situation easily, especially with little open help within proximity. i want to move, but it doesnât seem likely for a good bit.
the fandom life makes me feel like my ability to create things for a series i care about is dampened due to direct behavior from those most relevant to it, and further more makes me unsure who i can casually converse with who hasnât been told something. who pretends to be tolerable. most of the issues stemming from me venting in private spaces about callous situations (as if iâm the only one to have done this ever) , or from issues that never happened.
itâll probably happen again for the hintings in this very vent: being put on a spotlight in front of multiple witnesses and contacts over a situation misconstruing my morality. fuck off if i dont have my own space to vent about being put in a vulnerable situation and my boundaries ignored.
i dont think im completely free of judged behavior. i just think others (guess whichever one at your leisure) are not exempt from their own, what it causes as a reactive antagonizing, and neither the people whoâve enabled continuation or dismissed the boiling points.Â
i dunno. i felt like typing something out. the last week ive mostly felt glued to the couch.
i dont have a solution but if anything i just want to sleep so this isnât on my mind.
ive been having very drastic thoughts recently since i feel backed into some kind of corner with the options my luck gives me, but i guess im lucky im too cowardly to do shit.
again, i was distracting myself with cosplay stuff earlier. ill probably distract myself with drawing on a later date. but i cant help but feel like things will either get worse or iâll have to endure acting like things are fine. again.
i suppose the best thing is sticking to my own and continuing to do my own thing even if things dont look up. even tho ive been doing that.
thatâs all.
night.
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itâs fizz, with another fic, another au. idea lowkey stolen from the lovely @vioislit, but she has input donât worry :)
anyhow
âââââââ
âsuperâ broke
words: 1.2k
warnings: cursing, pain description, passing out...yes thatâs all
âââââ
Jack
Jack didnât actually like being late.
Crew was supposed to be at tech way before the actors, and yet here Jack was, earning a disappointed glare from his stage manager. Especially as her ASM, assistant stage manager, he should be ten minutes earlier.
Another thing Jack didnât like- or understand, really: why was he, a design major, assigned to assistant manage again? He couldâve helped design this whole set instead of attending rehearsals and taking notes and all the damn reading he had to do and the organizing and piles of paperwork⌠Well. Maybe he was assigned this to reorganize himself, actually. God knew heâd been wildly caught up in...himself.
Jack had reason, of course. It wasnât some self-absorbed thing (for once, Spot would say). He was genuinely busy outside of Shakespeare In Loveâhe had semester courses that were finishing up and finals were damn near literally creeping up his asshole, he swore. He had an entire art project to do that in actuality would have taken him two months...if he didnât have only two weeks to do it.
Jack groaned inwardly as he set up his laptop backstage, nabbing his printed pre-show list to start checking things off around the area. He was used to burying himself, but lately the soil felt suffocating. The showâwhich had turned out to be much bigger than anticipatedâhis classes, upcoming finals, and...yâknow.
The whole superpower thing.
Back in September, when Jack was working a play and running the lighting board, heâd been alone on headset and bored. He hadnât learned much about sound design yet, so of course he was messing around. The spotlights werenât up on the catwalk yet, their PSM wasnât anywhere to be seen, and no oneâs voice was crackling over the headset. Jack was idly turning dials on the soundboard as a result. Because Jackâand he knew thisâwas an idiot, he turned one of the many colored dials way up to one side. Heâd done it before to a few different dials and nothing had happened, so he figured ...Wrong. He figured really fucking wrong.
A piercing sound struck horizontally in his skull, like it's lightning-bolt points were stabbing through his brain and out of his ears. His hands lost feeling and he tried to cry out, eyes squeezed shut, though he could only emit a small gasp of agony. Honestly, Jack couldnât feel much of anything with the blinding pain at the forefront of his nerve endings. He knew his knees were to the ground now, he sure as hell wasnât standing with his legs heavy as lead. It wouldnât end, it seemed, the pain still as powerful as it was initially. If his hands decided to be useful, they could switch off the dial, or take off his headset, but for now, they were set on feebly attempting to protect himself. For some reason, heâd stuck his hands out and away, like the pain source was right in front of him.
Then, the brain-burning feeling dropped away, and Jack carefully opened his eyes to find a slightly opaque blue forcefield surrounding him like a bubble. He shifted to one side, and the blue moved with him. He sat up, and it adjusted. Jack broke out into an astonished grin. How the fuck had he gotten a forcefield from a sound board? Not like he cared how he got themâall that mattered was that he could make a forcefield with his fucking hands and that was the coolest shit heâd ever seen.
So that was the whole âsuperpowers thing.â
Since that day, Jack had been experimenting with himself, hence why everything else was becoming even more heavy on Jackâs back. He couldnât help but dedicate real time to figuring out this random new ability. Homework kind of took a backseat to mysterious abilities.
Jack would find himself a private area in between classesâsecluded enough not to simply be found but reasonable enough to not look sketchyâand just concentrate. Envision the blue around himself as he held up his hands, eyes scrunched closed. Picture its shade, a stark and royal blue, but still able to see right through it.
âJack.â
The pulse of something so close to being emitted from his palms.
âJack.â
Feel the zap of energy between his ears, somewhere deep in his brain-
âJack FUCKING Kelly! You in there?â
His gaze finally focused back in with a gasp. Someone was whapping his cheek.
Oh, god. Right. Shakespeare. Shit. He was still standing backstage, and was apparently staring at nothing.
âHi Sarah, um,â Jack chuckled sheepishly to his stage manager. âI, uh...dissociationâs a bitch, huh?â
Sarah Jacobs frowned. âTechnically true,â she muttered. âJust get back to it. Actors are called in twenty, so make sure your sideâs all set up.â
âThank you, twenty,â Jack sighed with a smile as her boots padded away. Thank God he was on her good side. Sarah was one of the toughest seniors Jack had ever come across. Her glare could probably cut straight through a freshmanâs heart.
Jack had finished setting in only ten minutes, about to decide to help the other ASM when something blinked out above him and a loud âSHIIIIIT, JesusâŚâ called from the back of the house.
âOh God, Spot, what happened?â Jack groaned, glancing up towards the lights as he came center stage. A whole line of them had gone out. Shit. âThe hell did you do, man?â
âWhatever it is, youâre dealinâ with it!â Spot yelled back. âIâm going over cues in three minutes. You figure it out, Kelly.â
He was on Sarahâs good side. Not Spotâs, despite he and Jack being in the same grade and shared many classes together.
âFuckingâŚ.fine.â At least it would give him something to do.
Jackâs investigation led him outside, unfortunately. He shivered against the cold as he checked the power box, only understanding what about half of the switches meant. Conlon never gave him a damn break, did he.
A gust of wind blew through him, making him shake like a damn leaf in addition. Fuck Spot rights, Jack decided spitefully.
âUh, hello- hi?â
Jack paused, turning around to see leaves swirling in the air still as well as a curly-haired kid staring at him with wide eyes. He looked freaked.
Jackâs lips pursed, hand coming up to gesture.
âDid youâŚâ Jack pointed to the kid, then in the direction the leaves were blowing.
âYeah,â the kid nodded hesitantly, âI was running-â
âYou were running?â Jack scoffed, surprised. âAnd it created a damn windstorm?â
âWell, yeah, whatâs it look like?â The kid shrugged, taking a few steps closer to Jack. âMaybe donât...tell anyone, okay?â
He looked rather vulnerable, eyes shifting around their surroundings in search of other possible witnesses. A pang of sympathy struck Jackâs heart, he couldnât help it.
âSure thing, kiddo,â Jack smiled. âIâm Jack. You can trust me, I promise.â
Jack watched the guy breathe out a small sigh. âIâm Anthony,â he smiled slightly, sticking out his hand. âAnd thanks.â
Jackâs smile grew. âNah, nah, I get it. Gotta keep your identity secret, and allâa that.â He shook the kidâs hand as Anthony let out a small laugh.
Something white and hot zig-zagged up Jackâs arm at the contact. He felt his whole body nearly vibrate, and then he blacked out. This really wasnât Jackâs goddamn day. ââââââ
of course the first thing I write is gonna be a series, because I hate making life easy please tell me if you donât wanna be on my tag list anymore! or if you wanna be on it! itâs been a few months heh :) just message me I donât bite
TAG LIST:
@suddenly-im-respecsable @getchapapes @felix-loves-albert-and-ralbert @spot-conlon-king-of-brooklyn @stopthe-presses @technically-whizzy @papesdontsellthemselves @starrysence @seasickdolphin @iamliterallyaghost @beep-beep-byler @the-newsies-justice-for-zas-blog @accidentalnewsiesblog @thebroadwayaesthetic @spot-me50-papes @i-got-no-clue-what-im-doing @kingofsantafe @we-dont-sell-papes @eveningpaper @sure-as-a-star @godhatesjordan @awkwardstranger98 @ireallyloveiainyoungwow @big-potato-asshole @have-we-got-news-for-you @bxnesof92 @backgroundensemble @orollyitsracetrackhiggins @a-most-auspicious-erster @modern-race-owns-airpods @asphodelnerd @albert-eats-cookie-cake @certified-kingofnewyork
#yayeet#ITS HERE! A POST! HOWS EVERYONE DOING TONGIHT YOU FEEL GOOD ?#my writing#jack kelly#racetrack higgins#spot conlon#sarah jacobs#heheh#newsies#newsies au#newsies fics#series#fizz freaks#:â) itâs here
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The dumbest post
I think yâall should be here to witness the dumbest post Iâll ever make, as Iâm not all about getting into discourse and that, and any other self-identifying Vergil lovers please come here:
@creepyscritches, @brasspetalsx, @fandomhell97, @breezeinmonochromenight, @kaldea88, @xalmasyx, @hornyangrybean, @noir-sorrow, @catspook, @xenontrioxide, @zilla-may-cry, @boobble, @vergilshusband, @tifaroni, @littlebluewraith, @im-a-clown, @genovaempera, @neodicronus, @thelessiknowtheworse, @thriilsy, @jestermania, @bunny-girl-sweetseek, @darka3363, @witchkiid, @45, @manadebutt, @magsamaire, @spaghetti-queerghetti, @clairexredfields, @204863-yunglynn, @yuri-subtext, @miss-soso-25, @josuke-kujo, @cameguisada, @trionfi, @glitteryhumanfiretrash, @lewdbunbun, @journalofsparda, @complacentdevil, @infernokid, @emogodmatthew, @brit-o-raptor, @salsa-and-chips, @gemstone-enema
Iâd like yâall to bear witness, as I take down this bitch-ass clown. As Iâve blocked the person in question that I want to call out - please tag them into this post to have at them ;) Also - to the other people that didnât get this, tag your mutuals and get them here.
Iâd also like to announce that @thephantomporg84 is now masquerading as @derelict-stranger, and I got a few messages a few days ago about how she was gonna take down her account, and how she wants me to block all of you, which is ridiculous as you are all blogs that I have known and followed way before her and also I donât know you either. I told her that I didnât want to be involved in her drama, but here I am.Â
Itâs kinda hard for me to make this post, as I genuinely thought that she was cool in the beginning - she helped to give me more DMC asks in my inbox, and she always reblogged my stuff, as Iâve been trying to make it with the big guys - like @myfairmidnightladyspade.
But I saw the stuff that she says online to you all, and I think I got some anon messages from her asking if I was a terf or not... and yeah - my heart broke. I feel like I have been deceived in some way. What I wanted to be there was someone who was cool, and funny to talk to, but turns out that person is petty, heartless, immature and straight up spiteful.
I may have to justify myself in why I got messages from her - I was only trying to console her, but to do it in a neutral way as I wanted no part in her drama.
Also - iâm probably not gonna show any evidence for how much she sucks cause thereâs tags and anon posts dedicated to that sort of thing
I want you on tumblr, and you on Reddit to find her, and in the /v/ section of 4chan to block her and report her for all sheâs done. I want you to wipe her existence from the internet until there is nothing left.
Now - I need to change the flow of the conversation by directing it to you, @derelict-stranger.
Iâd like you to kindly log off, take a breather and think, for a second about the actions that youâve done to the people that Iâve mentioned above.Â
Iâd also like to tell you that your suggestion to block all those people above is complete nonsense. Why would you make me block blogs who have perfectly decent and awesome content, and to those who I have talked to longer than you? why would you make me block blogs who I donât know? Quit trying to get me on your side. I want no part in your drama like I said before, and stop trying to manipulate me into getting me to give a shit about you.
Iâd also like to tell you that your situation is entirely self-inflicted. That you trying to talk to me wonât work, the only reason that people are apparently âattacking youâ - is because you, in fact, are the instigator, are the catalyst of all this hatred.
You - @derelict-stranger, lack any ability whatsoever to disagree well. From where Iâm looking, all of this started because you donât like Vergil from the Devil May Cry games and you donât like the plot of 5, which seems extremely stupid to me, as heâs only a small-ish part of 1, one of the best boss-fights in 3 and just a mere mention in 4. The fact that you need to incessantly attack content creators who merely like him is stupid. Either keep those opinions to yourself, ignore them, or do my favourite -> stick âem up your big stupid ass.
Itâs also stupid that when people merely like him - you have to bring in your own shitty opinions. No one asked you what you thought, and Iâm pretty sure youâre actively seeking out fights with people just to feel good about yourself. Itâs also super hypocritical of you ragging on about how much Vergil sucks, when you go crazy for Kylo Ren, as they share some similarities in terms of their vibes and traits. (Yeah - I see you asking for smutty Kylo Ren x Reader requests online.....) Why do you get pissy when people like villainous fictional characters - do your knickers
What I just want to know is what kind of personal gratification you get when you actively hate on a character, and what kind of gratification you get when just because someone disagrees with you - that you have to result using death threats, rape threats, pedophilia threats, racism, slurs, and ableism, transphobia, alt-right rhetoric, neo-Nazi shit, pro-Trump, and homophobic comments to content creators just doinâ their own thing. Is it just to feel like the bigger man, is it to make yourself sound smarter than the other person (Cause you donât) - like what actually motivates you, what actually makes you want to shit on other peopleâs parades, huh? Sounds to me like you need to get a life.
The fact that you always need to play the victim is sad and pathetic too:
- That youâre on the spectrum: - Okay, there are a lot of people who are on the spectrum here on tumblr. But they donât use it as an excuse to justify shitty behaviour especially if itâs unitentional. as Iâm sure they and the people they know are. Iâm sure they apologise and try to get on with life like how NT people do. As you know - a lot of people of the spectrum feel like theyâre being treated as sub-human being babies that do nothing but screech all the time, and theyâre taking action to change those perceptions. Your behaviours are not helping their cause.
- That you use depression as an excuse - Iâm kinda sympathetic to the whole mental health issues thing. I have them too. In fact, I am a hot mess. But I donât use that to excuse me hurting other people with intention, and Iâm sure many others donât either. At least 1/4 or 1/3 will have some mental health issues in their life, and yeah, it sucks, and itâs common but it doesnât make them exempt from them being called out on their shitty acts. the fact that so many people are and can be mentally ill doesnât make you special, and it doesnât give you a free pass to attack others.
- The fact that you try to bait people into making anti-semitic comments, so you can call them anti-semitic. Dude, thatâs low. Iâm pretty sure thatâs gaslighting and manipulation as well. You donât get the right to use your religion/race in that way as a defence when youâre feeling attacked so that you come off a better person. Iâm friends with many jewish people, and theyâd never have the gall to do that. I know that your peeople have had it rough, but you canât use that in an argument just to prove that the other one is a piece of shit, when it is in fact you. Iâm muslim, a WOC, and ancestrally speaking, from a country that your so-beloved president essentially banned their right to seek a better life in the states. For as long as I can remember - Iâve seen news about my kind being universally hated, Iâve been brought up in a post-9/11 world where for as long as I can remember that me and our kind are the enemy (so I can sympathise) - but you donât see me and other muslims here using those petty tactics that you use, because unlike you, weâre not myopic and we know that wonât get us anywhere.
I mean, this behaviour sounds bratty and childish - so I was thinking, sheâll probably grow out of it. Then I find that youâre in youâre mid-twenties, and I think âyou really havenât grown up at all, have you?â, and honestly it just makes the behaviour worse as you are resulting to middle school/high school tactics -> especially making me block all those people, calling them sociopaths and evil bitches. This ainât high school or Mean Girls, moron, this is a fandom. A place where people can create, share, like and comment on content that makes you happy. I donât think you understand what that means - cause all I see, and everyone sees is you spewing hatred everywhere. Fandoms are supposed to make you feel included, feel happy, feel safe, be a place to make friends. I donât think you know that, and I donât think you are even smart enough to realise that you are the reason why our fandom isnât happy.
And honestly, at this point, the hatred you are getting is well deserved. You deserve to feel like shit if all you are going to do is make others feel like shit.
I donât know what else to say but:
1. Get the hell away from our fandom
2. Get rid of your internet connection.
3. Get a life.
4. We donât want you here.
5. Youâre scum.
6. Go suck a dick, or flick a bean, whatever gets you off you troglodyte.
I liked you man, I really did. Then I saw how you treat others, and now I know I made a dumb life choice in making friends with you. If only you werenât such a piece of shit, we could have been good friends.
I donât want you here on tumblr. They donât want you here. No-one wants or needs a toxic parasite like you on this website.
Yours sincerely,
sui-senka, who just sucked Vergilâs dick yesterday, and liked it.
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