#im sorry if my point got lost!! i get a little emotional at times
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natsmagi Ā· 2 months ago
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i know i draw naru with differing hair lengths and in skirts/dresses, but it's simply because i like it and think it's cute; i still draw her in pants but sometimes skirts and with short hair and long hair. i think she would experiment with styles for the fun of it. i don't read many of the stories so i might be misinformed, but i genuinely love naru and find comfort in her character and how she expresses herself. i don't see her just as a trans girl, as a trans person i know what it's like to be reduced to my gender identity/assigned gender. she's just a character i love to draw and dress up. sorry i might just be trying to justify myself as i have drawn her in pink, long hair, and dresses before qq
AWHH NO THATS TOTALLY FINE!! we were kind of speaking on the subject using blanket terms, but there are exceptions to everything. if you wish to explore your own femininity through arashi you are more than welcome to do so! please do not feel dismayed!
my main gripe was when people start acting like happyele is ignoring arashi and her gender identity because shes not portrayed super stereotypically feminine. what i love about enstars is the nuance that comes with every character and their relationship with gender. its fine to project and indulge, it just makes me upset as a nonbinary person when trans people and characters are constantly forced into boxes. i think it would be LOVELY for arashi to experiment more with her wardrobe, especially as she enjoys both masculine and feminine clothing. so its not like her wearing girly stuff would inherently be OOC or anything like that. its all about the context surrounding it! so please, make all the little outfits your heart desires!
please do not take my little ranting as me saying youre not allowed to draw arashi in skirts or dresses or with her hair grown out, you are more than welcome to explore all of these aspects! especially if you yourself are trans and it makes you euphoric! again, my issue lies not with people drawing her in cute clothes or with longer hair, but with people feeling like thats what she Needs to look like if that makes sense? and i get upset when other androgynous characters get to have their fun little feminine outfit only for people to complain that it shouldve been arashi wearing it instead, ignoring the significance of that outfit to the character wearing it.
either way, my post was made in a heat of the moment, and we have been discussing it in a rather generalized tone, but i hope this clears it up a little bit. if youre doing something for yourself there is nothing wrong with being as indulgent as you want! i literally draw femstars after all, so know it was never my intention to come across that way. i love using these characters as my little dress up dolls too! and know theres no need to apologize for having fun ā¤ especially as my complaints were not directed at u.... and i again apologize if it came across that way. i never want to demotivate anyone from drawing what they love, so please do not stop just because i got a little mad over takes i saw....... sending u all the love šŸ’•šŸ’•
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sleepy-stitches Ā· 6 months ago
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cleaning my room is so much effort but oh well its not like anything could have been done to reduce that <- FOOL WHO HASNT CLEANED IN OVER A YEAR
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sereniv Ā· 5 months ago
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apologies are hard and can be embarassing
but life is too short to let your grandma go to bed sad
#it wasnt a big bad deal#but i didnt listen and projected my guilt#i wanted to be angry and annoyed#but whats the point#is it really that important to feel right when youre actually wrong#to feel mighty bc youre less emotional than another person#its hard to swallow that pride and to admit you were wrong#but you never know if this moment is the last with that person#and putting in that perspective it makes it easy to say youre sorry#i sometimes forget this#something i learned very young after fighting with my mom and upon reflection realized i was wrong the whole time#ive always had this ability since then to swallow my pride almost immediately and jump straight to fixing what i did wrong#but then long story short i lost that ability when i learned the word 'no' for myself#i stopped paying attention and focused on only me#and sometimes i forget that this is not who i want to be. i forget to work on myself#im glad that i made myself apologize and im glad that i made sure i didnt apologize weakly#none of that 'im sorry you feel that way'#but id like to work on avoiding this all together. and thats hard for me. because it requires me to be aware like i used to#which for me is PTSD related. but i dont want to be on my deathbed recalling all the pointless times i doubled down#taking up time that could have been happy#people say its easy to be kind and it is but sometimes when youre guilty it feels good to give into your frustrations and get defensive#again nothing bad happened. i just told her i wanted to do the dishes. she was currently washing some and because of guilt#of my perception of what shes able to do i doubled down on me doing them instead of her even though she assured me she was able#i thought she was lying to me and she got upset. no yelling just not allowing her to do what little shes able#and not trusting her at her word. to be fair she does lie and will admit that she has- when doing things when i feel sick#even when i tell her that id rather choose what im able to do instead of her assuming. which is exactly what i did#me being a hypocrit. so yeah. not a great feeling on multiple levels of this scenario#but truly i need to remember to focus on what matters and that is just taking someones word for it while making sure they know they can#freely tell their feelings. meaning if shes doing the dishes and she says shes fine. let it be. and make sure she absolutely knows that when#i say im fine that i too am telling the truth
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mbbmz Ā· 18 days ago
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HEY IM BACKKšŸ¤­ Wakasa has been on my mind the past days (he deadass appeared in my dreamšŸ’€) So I got a request where Wakasa is friends with reader and secretly likes her but hides it really well. So when the 1st gen bd drink together and Waka gets drunk he won't get off her, hugging her n stuff and it eventually leads to a sleepy confession from him ykkšŸ¤­ The others all tease him the next day for itšŸ˜­ (sry if this is kinda long)
Omgg hi again! Iā€™m so glad you decided to request again (I love Wakasa)
Your requests are always interesting ml heheheheh, even though Iā€™m not really proud of this one, I still hope youā€™ll enjoy it (and sorry for the wait)
No warnings, alcohol consumption (a bit too much in this instance) fluff and crack
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Every time you changed something about your appearance, no matter how small it was, no matter how many of your friends didnā€™t notice, Wakasa always did. Might be the slightest change in your hair or makeup, youā€™d always receive a "It suits you well" or "Thatā€™s a nice change". He would always carry that bored expression as he says it, as if he didnā€™t really care. But how would he notice such small details if he didnā€™t?
Of course he cared. He was your best friend after all. You called him that, others called you that, he called himself that. Even if those words left a bitter taste in his mouth. Yet heā€™d never act on it. He was content with what he had, content with the proximity you two shared. Even though he wanted more, he swallowed back all his feelings. Because Wakasa, as much as he didnā€™t like to admit it, was scared to lose you. So he swallowed back the lingering touches he wanted to give you, any comments that could appear as "too much", for the sake of your friendship. One he would continue to cherish, even if that meant settling for less than he wanted.
- "Come on, just one drink!"
You rolled your eyes. Currently, you were downplaying the invitation of your friend, really insistent to get you to drink with the small group tonight.
- "Dont insist, Omiā€¦ I have work tomorrowā€¦"
It was Takeomiā€™s turn to roll his eyes.
- "Just live a littleā€¦ besideā€¦"
A small smirk appeared on his face. You were almost, almost curious as to what he was about to say.
- "I donā€™t believe youā€™ve ever seen Waka getting drunkā€¦"
Your annoyed rambling about work stopped for a second. He was right, your best friend, the one youā€™ve known since so longā€¦ Have never been drunk in front of you. And you couldnā€™t deny that the thought made you curious. What kind of drunk was he? Emotional drunk? Tired drunk?.. Yeah, definitely thatā€¦
After a few seconds of thinking, you sighed, you couldnā€™t deny one drink sounded nice.
- "One drinkā€¦" You finally indulged, watching his smirk widen
- "You wonā€™t regret itā€¦ itā€™s actually pretty fun to watchā€¦"
On those words, you started walking toward the bar you often went at, where the others were probably already waiting.
And when Takeomi told you it would be fun to watch, you didnā€™t expect that. And based on his expression, he didnā€™t either.
You were trying to drink in your now half empty glass, but you found it difficult to do so, as a pair of strong arms were wrapped around your figure.
- "Iā€™veā€¦ never seen him like this beforeā€¦" Stated Shinichiro, sitting across of you. In his eyes was a mixture of confusion and curiosity.
At this point, all the eyes around the table were on you, more precisely on the man clutching at your side. Wakasa Imaushi, the White Leopard, Black dragons founding member and first generation Special attack Unit captain, THE living legendā€¦ Clinging to you like a lost child.
- "N-No one- hic -can touch herā€¦ ā€˜xcept meā€¦" He mumbled, eyes closed and face red from all the shots he had.
You were torn. Youā€™ve never seen him like that, with you or with anyone. And your best friend being so clingy, soā€¦ touchyā€¦ felt weird. But at the same timeā€¦ it wasnā€™t a bad kind of weird.
- Wakaā€¦ I think Iā€™ll drive you homeā€¦
As you muttered those words, you felt his grip tightening. Goddamnit was he strong. You winced slightly, trying to get him off, to no avail.
- "Can someoneā€¦ Help me out here?.." you asked, a bit annoyed at the lack of reaction from your friends
The three guys exchanged looks, before looking back at you.
- "I meanā€¦ you heard him." Started Takeomi, a sly grin on his face
- "No one can touch you except him!" Finished Keizo, raising his hands to support his words
You rolled your eyes, hearing the three of them laughing like degenerates. Unbelievable.
You had to find something though. You wanted to go home, too. Yet it was proven difficult with the bag of muscles holding you tightly.
You sighed, looking at his slumped form, trying to find something to get him off.
- "ā€¦ Hey Wakaā€¦ Letā€™s go home, mhm?.." You tried to bargain, with seemingly no success.
- "N-Nahā€¦ Mā€™stayingā€¦ with youā€¦" He mumbled, his speech almost incomprehensible.
You sighed sighed again. You definitely wanted to go home, getting a bit tired yourself.
- "ā€¦ Wanna sleep at my place?.." You asked, as all eyes on the table landed on you, even his. You felt a need to denfend yourself to your peers.
- "N-Not like that! Iā€™m not that kind of person!" You tried to defend yourself
- "Thatā€™s really inappropriate. I wouldnā€™t have taken you for the typeā€¦" Teased the black haired mechanic, a cigarette dangling from his lips.
- "Mhmmā€¦ Take me home, loveā€¦"
Your eyes widened, as everyone elseā€™s. You looked down at your lap, eyes landing on a very sleepy Waka, nuzzling your thigh.
- "ā€¦ Yeah, Iā€™ll take him homeā€¦ Heā€™sā€¦ not in his right mindā€¦" You muttered, trying to calm the emotions he provoked by calling you that.
- "Heh, you know what they sayā€¦ A drunk manā€™s words is a sober manā€™s thoughts!"
You glared at Takeomi, who was laughing his ass off with your other friends. They wouldnā€™t let that die down easilyā€¦
You called a cab, trying to walk with a grown ass man clutched at your hip. Quite a humorous sight, really.
The drive wasnā€™t long thankfully, and you managed to drag the drunk man in your bed. You were too tired to do anything else, crashing on the mattress next to his unconscious form. You were about to fall asleep, when his voice caught your attention.
-" ā€˜Meant it, yā€™knowā€¦ I donā€™tā€¦ wanna be your friendā€¦ wanna be moreā€¦"
You listened to his drunken confession, your own eyes fighting to stay open and focused on his relaxed face.
- "Wannaā€¦ hold you andā€¦ do shit couples do, I dunnoā€¦"
A small silence followed his words, lingering in the air. You looked at him one last time, before your eyes closed on their own.
- "Gā€™night, Wakaā€¦"
The only answer you received was the sound of his slow breathing and light snores. You would deal with that tomorrowā€¦
- "Hey, "love"! Mind grabbing me a beer?" Teased a certain black haired man, as your now boyfriend was glaring at him, fighting the urge to smash his head on the coffee table.
- "Takeomi I swear to godā€¦" He warned, pinching the bridge of his nose as you let out a small chuckle.
He could now hold you, kiss you, and do plenty of other shit couples do.
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cloudyskydreams Ā· 21 days ago
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Hello, could you do a one shot of Sans looking Reader's photo album when she was little?
This is so cute šŸ„ŗ you absolutely can, Thanks so much for requesting sorry it took me a bit to get to it! I had a lot of fun with this one even though it was a struggle to find motivation! I hope you guys enjoy it as much as I did!
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You had convinced Sans to do a bit of spring cleaning, it was mostly you doing a majority of the work and him being your emotional support but he did help a a little bit.
While cleaning out your closet you had come upon a box of your old things and of course got distracted going through it. You were having a good time going through all of your little keepsakes from over the years and the stories that went along with them until you struck gold at the very bottom of the box. An old photo album you had been gifted a few years ago filled to the brim with photos of you as a tiny tot and a camera full of home videos. You squeal in excitement as you head over to the bed.
"Sans, look at this!" He looks at what you have in your hands and his grin grows.
"im booking babe, what is it?"
You throw open the cover and the first page is filled with baby photos, there's one of you in a cute little inside and one with you and your favorite stuffed animal. "A photo album!" You cheer and sit next to him setting the book in between you.
Sans looks down intrigued by the photos in front of him and his eyelights expand slightly upon taking on the sight of baby you.
"so small..." He says softly as he looks over the photos. You flip the page and there's a few of you as a baby dressed up in different outfits and mostly with family.
The first photo in the page is of you still in the hospital "This is right after I was born!" You say happily showing him and his eyelights almost fill his sockets as he stares at the photo.
"are all human children that small when first born?" he asks and you're surprised he didn't pun then again he sounds genuinely curious.
"Yup we're all pretty small, and weak too can't even lift our heads up at first gotta be gentle with babies." You giggle.
"makes sense thanks for the heads up babe." His grin widens and you groan playfully before returning your attention to the photo album in front of you.
"Oh! This one's from when I lost my first tooth!" You point to the photo and then launch into an explanation over how you had lost said tooth. Sans listens with rapt attention a gentle smile on his face as he takes in your story while watching your expressions.
He looks back to the photo album when you're done "tooth be told you were a cute kid, what's this one from?" He points to a photo of your child self with a few other kids dressed up in costumes.
"Halloween! My mom made that costume herself she was really proud of it." You smile down at the photo before flipping the page again.
The next photo you point out is of you standing next to a woman with flour coating your hair and hands. There's a small splotch of it on your cheek as well as you give a toothy smile to the camera.
"Heh this one was a night me and mom decided to bake some cookies, I made such a mess. Those are still my favorite cookie to this day too." You giggle thinking about the memory.
"heh thought you had that flour power huh?" You giggle and nudge his arm gently.
"That one was pretty bad babe."
"awh dishes br-egging my heart."
You roll your eyes and turn your attention back to the book as your bonefriend chuckles next to you.
There's a few more photos on this page some with family and some with just you. There's one of you with your childhood pet. You excitedly tell Sans about said pet and how much you had loved that sweet baby.
The two of you look through your photos for awhile. Sans seems happy to be able to see you as a kid and his eyelights remain dilated the entire time he's looking at the photos. You laugh over a few stories and cry over others but it's a good time.
After the photo album is done you grab the camera and turn it on. "Ohh Sans look these are my first steps." You turn the camera to Sans and he watches as a baby you hesitantly stands up and takes a few shaky steps before falling down.
Sans gently takes the camera from you and you rest your head on his shoulderbone as he starts to flip through the videos and photos.
He laughs over a video of you completely covered in baby powder at the age of 3 looking like a walking powdered doughnut.
The next video is of you dancing to a populat pop song at the time singing your heart out as your parents cheer you on. Sans chuckles as he watches your little body dance around the small screen dramatically.
There's even a few videos and selfies that you took yourself when you were old enough to work the camera and Sans seemed to really love watching little you playing with their toys like it's a reality TV show.
"you were such a cute kiddo babe, I'll have to whip out mine and Paps old albums sometime." He says softly as he hands the camera back to you.
"Eee I'd love to see some cute little babybones!" You squeal and pack up the box again being extra gentle with the pieces of your childhood.
After that the cleanings pretty much done for as you had lost motivation after going through the box and you flopped onto the bed to cuddle with Sans as you watched a movie. While watching the movie though you're distracted by a thought the entire time.
"Hey Sans... What do you think our baby would look like?" Sans makes a choked sound. His face holds a shocked expression and there's a slight blush to his face as he looks at you.
"...wanna find out?"
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little-miss-dilf-lover Ā· 1 year ago
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Hiii, this is my first time requesting a Miguel ficšŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­ nervous
so like hurt/comfort where spider-woman reader was a mother and losing her child (preferably a daughter) was one of her cannon events.
Shes watching old videos on her phone/laptop where her kids kind of like, standing on her feet and they're dancing together to my love mine all mine by mistki (her new album destroyed me) and Miguel walks in and just watches.
Miguel gets caught staring at the videos but instead of telling him to leave she asks him to stay because she knows hes been through something similar. They're just watching old videos of her kid and then they eventually move onto talking about Gabi too.
im a sucker for friends/coworkers to lovers so maybe add a little lovey dovey smut at the end if you want <333
rlly sorry if this is a bit much i just had to get this out of my smooth little brainšŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­
hii!! AAA I love it!! but really sorry, no smut in this one :(( I had too many ideas but I had a total brain fart writing this. thank you for requesting, hope you like itšŸ’Œ
ā€”
OF THE PAST
miguel oā€™hara x spider-woman!reader
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word count: 550
warnings: mentions of death, grief etc
āœ§.ā”Š MASTERLIST
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Grief and loss aren't uncommon emotions for a Spider-Person. They were feelings all Spiders experienced at one point- all of you connected by a singular canonical death.Ā 
For many others, their event was the death of Uncle Ben, but not you. Yours was your daughter- your little love who 'mistakenly' got caught in the crossfire.
Not many Spiders could resonate with the grief of losing a child, nor could one imagine the weight of it. It's a feeling that can truly be understood by those who have experienced the same thing, by someone who had also lost a child.Ā 
There was only one who could comprehend your grief, Miguel.
You'd often find yourself rewatching old family tapes of you and your daughter, replaying the clips over and over as if the memories weren't painful enough.Ā 
You'd essentially watch your life back, looking over videos and pictures of you and your little girl- times when you baked cupcakes, or had secret picnics in the backyard. Beautiful moments where you danced in the living room, her tiny feet balanced on yours as you held her hands, spinning her around to the music.Ā 
When you watched it back, you couldn't recognise yourself. The woman in the videos isn't here anymore. She was long gone, and you missed her.Ā 
-
You were still at HQ, not wanting to return to an empty home, so you stayed, sitting in the vacant cafeteria as you stared aimlessly at your phone, honing in on the tiny writing at the top of the screen, '1 year ago today.'
"You can sit down," you whisper to the presence behind -Miguel- who has been lurking for the past few minutes.
"What gave it away?" he quietly asks, pulling out a chair next to you.
"Your heart," you sadly smile at him and turn your focus back to your phone.Ā 
The subject of child loss is always incredibly tricky, never knowing what to say or constantly worrying if you said the wrong thing. It's hard to gauge what does more harm to the parent, and though Miguel is dealing with a similar situation, he still found himself at a loss.Ā 
"I do that too," he finally speaks, nodding to your hand. "It feels good for a bit, then it just..."Ā 
"Hurts some more," you finish his sentence, weakly chuckling.
"Yeah," he nods, twisting around in his chair to face you. "Can I see?"
You hum, lightly nodding as you pressĀ herĀ photo album, turning it so Miguel could see.Ā 
You swipe through with tears prickled in your eyes, looming in the water line as you smile at the screen.Ā 
"This one," you speak up, clearing your throat. "Sheā€” uh, she got into my makeup bag," you laugh, recalling the memory. "And sheā€” erm, she stained her face for a few days. Looked like a panda for a while."
Miguel chuckles, fully immersed in your story. "Gabi did that, too. But she," his smile widens, shaking his head. "Found high heels and dresses."Ā 
"Mine too," you snicker, showing him the picture of your daughter playing adult dress up.Ā 
You both stay like that for a while, sharing stories and memories of your daughters, recalling comical events to lighten the atmosphere. The pair of you telling tales in a way that connects you.
ā€” ā€” ā€” ā€” ā€” ā€” ā€” ā€” ā€” ā€” ā˜† ā€” ā€” ā€” ā€” ā€” ā€” ā€” ā€” ā€” ā€”
artwork by shuploc
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auspicious-manner Ā· 1 year ago
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welcome back! just some simple domestic fluff with mike faist and famous reader! get to this whenever you feel like it! lots of love<3
thank you for the kindness! <3
iā€™ve missed writing for mike! also have you guys seen the new challengers trailer AHHHHH IM SO EXCITED IT LOOKS SO GOOD!!! i have a few challengers themed mike stories in my inbox/drafts, so expect those somewhat soon ;)
also itā€™s been a long time since iā€™ve written a fluff fic, so sorry if this sucks lol
fem reader x mike faist
warnings: anxiety and mentions of depression
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Worthy
ā€¢
you loved nearly everything about your life. being an actress, singer, and now a writer has given you more confidence than anything else.
you started as an actress. ever since you were little, you would put on shows for your entire family with costumes and scripts. they werenā€™t simple either; you would perform full dramatic monologues, emotional scenes, and romantic moments with your stuffed animals. your mom didnā€™t have to hesitate putting you into acting classes.
into your teen years, you booked commercials and small roles in childrenā€™s shows. then, right when you turned eighteen, you got your big break when you gained a major role in a movie alongside some of hollywoodā€™s biggest stars, directed by none other than steven spielberg.
from there, business offers and acting gigs flew in. everything seemed to be happening all at once. it was all so overwhelming. but fame is what you wanted, right?
thatā€™s what you thought, at least. as a child, you glamorized the picturesque hollywood starlight life. you wanted everything from the glitz to the glam. you didnā€™t realize that being famous came with this sense of dread that one wrong move could end your entire career. you felt unworthy of being in the spotlight all the time. so, in order to keep those intrusive thoughts from rearing their ugly heads, you kept so busy that not even a single thought could even cross your mind.
you knew you could sing, and you began writing songs and releasing music. you even went on a north american tour. then, when the tour slowed down, you wrote a novel. you kept so busy that you lost track of who you really were. what you felt you were meant to do.
sure, you had success and had more connections and fans than anyone could dream of. but what did it matter when you felt so alone?
you began closing yourself off. the limelight was making you anxious, and you couldnā€™t bring yourself to be seen in public in the state you were in. it all felt so hopeless. you considered living of the grid and going incognito in order to escape the expectations placed on you. for months, you stayed as hidden as possible, and it only made things worse.
being a long time friend of steven spielberg at this point, he sent you a personal invite to the premiere his new film west side story. you almost threw the invite in the trash. the thought of going out on a red carpet again and seeing all of these faces with bright, flashing cameras was out of the equation for you. yet, you missed the feeling of being dolled up. you missed feeling pretty.
when the big night came, seeing yourself in the dress that you had picked out didnā€™t feel real. you felt like you and not you all at the same time. your mind was conflicted; you knew the glam of hollywood was what made you happy, but since it had been so long since you have felt that way, you felt oddly out of body.
it was a long, off white dress with a leg slit and a completely open back. the dress had sleeves that stopped just below your shoulders, and it hugged your body tightly but not uncomfortably. your wavy hair fell onto your shoulders neatly in a half up half down, your curtain bangs framing your face. for the makeup, you tried to keep it relatively natural, and you didnā€™t want to draw too many eyes. you paired the look with some heels and a purse.
looking in the mirror, you tried your hardest to feel positive. you looked beautiful, you felt beautiful, yet something still felt wrong. maybe it was because you had no one by your side if you got anxious. as far as you knew, you would know one person there.
the car sent to pick you up took you on a ride through new york as your heart rate quickened. when you arrived at the scene, the bright lights and red carpet gave you chills.
after walking into the crowd, it didnā€™t take long to find steven. he pulled you aside into a fatherly hug. it felt good to be near someone as familiar as him.
ā€œY/N, long time no see!ā€ he said excitedly as you hugged him.
ā€œitā€™s been a while, hasnā€™t it?ā€ you replied, pulling away.
ā€œwhat have you been up to? knowing you, iā€™m sure itā€™s something great!ā€
you smiled, trying to create a facade. ā€œoh, you know, a little bit of this and a little bit of that,ā€ you said while nervously laughing. you couldnā€™t tell steven spielberg that youā€™ve been in a slump and that the most productive part of your day is waking up and making something to eat.
ā€œiā€™m excited to see whatever you have up your sleeve,ā€ he said, going to your side and taking your arm. ā€œnow, thereā€™s someone iā€™d like you to meet.ā€
he guided you through the crowds, and you kept close to him. everything was becoming overwhelming.
you approached a man with his back turned to you. ā€œY/N, meet mike faist. you two could have a lot to talk about.ā€
the man turned around, and the first thing you noticed about him was that his eyes seemed to be glowing. they were brighter and bluer than anything youā€™d ever seen. they were absolutely stunning. upon further inspection, you realized that you recognized him from the posters for the movie, and knew he was playing riff.
he smiled at you, almost as enthralled with you as you were with him. he held out a hand, and you took it gently to shake it. you hoped he didnā€™t feel the sweat building on your palms. ā€œY/N L/N, itā€™s lovely to meet you.ā€
you grew flustered. ā€œhowā€™d you know my last name?ā€
mike looked taken aback. ā€œdoesnā€™t everyone?ā€ your smile fell slightly, and mike noticed. ā€œiā€™m a big fan of your work. your songs, your movies, and i recently started reading your book too. youā€™re amazing at everything you do.ā€
steven patted your shoulder before walking away, leaving you with mike. mike had a presence about him that made you feel welcomed and seen. itā€™s been a while since you felt that way.
ā€œso, mike, what else have you been in?ā€ you asked, wanting to know more about his work. he knew so much about yours, and you felt a little embarrassed that you didnā€™t know more about him.
he smiled and looked down. ā€œi was a newsie in newsies on broadway, and i covered jack kelly. i played connor murphy in dear evan hansen on broadway, i was in a tv show called panic, and a lot of other stage and film work.ā€
you nodded, squinting your eyes slightly. ā€œyou know, iā€™ve seen both of those shows on broadway, and i didnā€™t realize until just now that that was you.ā€
he laughed. ā€œam i not memorable?ā€
you giggled in return. ā€œi donā€™t think itā€™s that. i just think iā€™m missing a little part of my brain.ā€
you and mike continued to talk about your respective careers. you noticed that he was so easy to talk to, and that he listened to and hung onto every word that you would say. it gave you butterflies, and you wondered what was wrong with you.
sadly, you remembered youā€™re at mikeā€™s movie premiere and he had to do interviews and talk to other people besides you. you could tell he wanted to stay with you, but knew he had other obligations. before he left, he said, ā€œweā€™ll see each other again before the night is through.ā€
youā€™ve had plenty of men try and charm you, with the efforts always falling flat. youā€™re no stranger to keeping your feelings under control and learning to not date in hollywood. it was too easy to be played by the wrong guys. but, your heart was telling you something different about mike. he made you more nervous and giddy than anyone else ever had and you barely knew him. you started to forget about the fact that youā€™ve been a hermit battling with your mental health for the last few months.
you caught up with a few old friends from the industry that you had recognized in the crows before it was time to go to a private screening of the film.
you watched as everyone funneled into seats in the theater next to their plus ones and friends. you stood back, scoping the area for empty seats. you felt frozen as all the seats seemed to fill.
ā€œfollow me,ā€ a voice said close to your ear before taking your hand and walking with you down the rows of seats. you noticed it was mike and you smiled to yourself.
he took you close to the screen, but not too close, and sat down with you. you sighed. ā€œthanks for saving me back there, i was getting stressed.ā€
mike tilted his head. ā€œyouā€™re from around here. youā€™re used to red carpets and screenings, arenā€™t you? i didnā€™t think this would stress out someone as experienced as you.ā€
he was right, it shouldnā€™t have stressed you out. you were so used to hiding away for so long that this all felt new to you again like it did when you were eighteen.
mike noticed your expression change, and he turned to you. ā€œiā€™m sorry, i shouldnā€™t have said anything. but youā€™re worrying me a bit, is everything okay?ā€
you tried to brush it off. ā€œiā€™m fine now, really. crowds just get me anxious-ā€
ā€œiā€™m not just talking about tonight,ā€ mike said, leaning in towards you. ā€œthe world has caught onto your unprecedented disappearance from the public eye. that can never mean anything good. are you sure youā€™re okay?ā€
you bit your lip, holding back tears. it was one thing to keep everything to yourself and pack it away and never confront what youā€™re actually going through, but to hear someone else say it put it into perspective for you. you had completely lost track of your vision and goal in life. you had lost track of you.
mike put his hand on your leg comfortingly, taking the silence and the glossy tears hidden in your eyes as a sign that you werenā€™t okay. the silent support he sent was exactly what you needed in that moment. a stranger was the person you least expected to comfort you.
before you could both think to say anything else, steven appeared at the front of the crowd and gave a speech, followed by the showing of the movie. every time mike appeared on the screen, you got chills. he was amazing. his performance made you hate riff yet feel some kind of empathy for him. that was due to mikeā€™s spellbinding performance.
occasionally, you would feel mikeā€™s eyes glance at you when important scenes came up. itā€™s almost as if he wanted to see your reaction. he wanted your approval.
then, after two and a half short hours, the movie ended, and the theater erupted in applause. everyone stood on their feet and you did the same, small tears running down your cheeks. you looked at mike, and his smile dropped when he saw you.
ā€œwhy are you crying?ā€ he asked.
you sniffled. ā€œit was so amazing. you were so amazing.ā€
mike turned red, and he reached down to envelope you in probably the best hug youā€™ve ever had. he had the widest grin, and it wasnā€™t just from the movie.
you and mike traded numbers, and from that night on, you became inseparable.
*
mike awoke something in you that hadnā€™t been seen in a long time. he made you feel inspired at motivated and comfortable. you hid yourself away from the world in fear that the public would turn on you, twist your words into something far from the truth. mike dispelled those feelings for you; you felt like yourself again around him.
after the night at the premiere, mike made the first move in wanting to talk to you. you face timed each other for hours each night, staying awake into the early hours of the morning just talking about anything and everything.
you went out for a coffee date a week after the premiere, and it seemed clear to both of you that there was more to be discovered than just a friendship.
as you were walking through central park with mike, keeping your head slightly down as to not attract any unwanted eyes, you boldly brushed your hand against his, letting it linger for a moment. his hand moved away, but creeped back into place when he realized what you were doing. he slowly grazed his finger tips against yours as he walked, and he reached his fingers out and your hand fit neatly into his. you continued to hold hands for the rest of your walk.
when you arrived back at your apartment, you both sat down on the couch, your bodies turned inwards to face each other.
ā€œi feel like iā€™ve know you my whole life, but its only been a week,ā€ you said quietly, looking into his eyes.
mike smiled lightly. ā€œiā€™ve never clicked this fast with anyone.ā€
you both paused, and mike hesitated before he spoke again. ā€œcan i ask you a question?ā€
you nodded, and he went on.
ā€œthereā€™s always been so much speculation about your love life in the media, and dating rumors and whatnot. i donā€™t like believing anything the media says, but i want to hear it straight from you.ā€
you smiled to yourself. the media liked to pull things that werenā€™t actually there and make up stories for fun. youā€™ve never actually had a real date since youā€™ve been in the business, let alone a relationship.
ā€œi havenā€™t found anyone worthy yet.ā€
mike nodded, scooting closer to you. you could tell he was aiming to put his arm around you, but hesitated to see your reaction. you leaned in, telling him without words that it was okay, and he rested his arm around your shoulder as you laid close to each other. you immediately felt comfortable under his arm.
ā€œi admire you, Y/N. i always have. i like that you know what you want, and that you know yourself. thatā€™s a really great quality to have.ā€
you blushed, but your happiness faltered. you leaned your head back on his arm. ā€œyeah, i guess. too bad i havenā€™t felt that way recently.ā€
mike looked at you, frowning. ā€œwhy? if you donā€™t mind me asking.ā€
you werenā€™t typically the one to open up quickly to strangers. but mike felt different. he wasnā€™t going to judge, or make you feel bad about yourself. he was comforting.
ā€œiā€™ve hid myself away from the world because iā€™m scared. iā€™m so insanely scared of messing up and having the whole world turn on me. so, i did the only thing i could think to do. i locked myself away in hopes that it would help,ā€ you giggled nervously. ā€œit didnā€™t do shit.ā€
you were smiling at your own misfortune, but mike stayed somber. ā€œiā€™m sorry, Y/N, thatā€™s awful.ā€
you shrugged. ā€œyeah, but i did it to myself.ā€
mike sat up, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear. you froze under his touch. ā€œthe world needs your brilliance. donā€™t be afraid, thereā€™s so many people ready to guide you and protect you from anyone trying to take you down. iā€™m here for you, i promise.ā€
you bit your lip, unable to say words. mike was so incredibly kind. all you could do was whisper a thank you.
mike put his arm back around you, and you leaned into the couch together. ā€œif thereā€™s anything i can do to help, let me know,ā€ he said quietly.
you leaned your head on his shoulder, looking up at him. ā€œyou already have.ā€
mike smiled, turning red. ā€œyouā€™re cute.ā€
you felt complete. you hadnā€™t known mike for that long, but he filled a part of your soul that had been gone for a while. he made you feel liked again when you couldnā€™t like yourself.
you sat up and looked at him. your faces were only a few inches apart. at the same time, you leaned in, and your lips grazed each other before interlocking. it felt euphoric.
you pulled away, remaining close, and you smiled at each other. ā€œyouā€™re the most talented person iā€™ve ever met,ā€ you whispered to him.
mike lightly placed his hand under your chin. ā€œthat means a lot coming from you. i love everything you do.ā€
you leaned in again, feeling your old self coming back again. you felt renewed. mike made you feel like the star you are again.
you rested your forehead on his. ā€œthank you.ā€
mike tilted his head slightly. ā€œfor what?ā€
ā€œfor making me feel worthy again.ā€
mike smiled lightly, then gave you a short but sweet kiss. ā€œnever forget that youā€™re beautiful and wanted.ā€
a small tear escaped your eye. mike was everything you needed. you almost felt in denial that someone like him could be making you feel this way because you were so used to men not valuing you. you were moving fast with mike, but it felt right. you were never one to believe in love at first sight, but this was pretty damn close.
you leaned into his side again, and his hand rested on the back of your head. you could get used to this.
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youaintnothinbuta Ā· 1 year ago
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hello i am back ! thank you sm for your last post, i really enjoyed it!! anyways i have fallen down the jd rabbit hole. could i request a jd x reader where reader is very affectionate but jd is hesitant bc of veronica (he saw her suicide but moved before he knew it was fake and feels super guilty) then reader starts to get a little more distant because of the lack of reciprocation on jd's end. anyways this is gonna go on for too long, could u make it end with reader finding out what happened and reader comforts jd, and he just suddenly melts from the affection. (IM CRYING THIS DOES NOT MAKE SENSE I'M SORRY )
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Summary: ^^
Pairing: Jd x reader
Warnings: mention of suicide, pretty much all warnings that come with anything heathers related. also probably typos and grammatical errors cos Iā€™m tired
Word count: 774
Request something here !
ā”ā”ā”ā”ā”ā”ā”ā”ā”ā”ā”ā”ā”ā”ā”ā”ā”ā”ā”ā”ā”
Relief washed over you when you heard the familiar creak of your window opening. Looking up, you found your boyfriend, Jd, gracefully climbing into your room, a mischievous glint in his eyes as always. He got comfy beside you in your bed, snuggling up as he pulled your diary towards him, trying to peek.
ā€œNo.ā€ You snapped it closed and popped it on your bedside table, telling him off.
ā€œYouā€™re really never gonna let me read that thing?ā€
ā€œMaybe one day, when weā€™re 40 and I randomly find it after having forgotten about it for years.ā€ You replied.
Jd laughed with a little shake of his head.
The evening went by much per normal, him climbing back out your window to head back to his own home, ā€œIā€™ll see you at school,ā€ he says as you shut your window behind him.
You let your body sit heavily on your bed, sighing. He had never been the most affectionate, you figured that was just the way he was. But lately heā€™s been even less affectionate. Heā€™ll still let you be touchy with him, cuddling him and kissing on him but everything on his end has pretty much dissipated. Not even an arm around you as you walk together anymore. It felt like this big wedge was being driven through the middle of your relationship, and he -for some reason- wasnā€™t noticing it.
Another week or so passed, and the distance between you two had grew exponentially. You couldnā€™t entirely blame him, for you somewhat adopted this mindset of ā€˜if he wants to be distant, fine, I can be distant too.ā€™
But it had gone on for too long now, and had gotten worse than you ever thought it could. You barely even talked at school, you just sort of sat together in this weird unresolved silence.
You had had enough. One evening you got yourself out of bed and marched yourself over to Jdā€™s house, not planning on leaving until you figured out what his deal was.
ā€œJd, I canā€™t do this anymore.ā€ You wasted no time, immediately speaking as you crawled though his window, startling him.
ā€œY/Nā€”ā€
ā€œWhat are we doing?ā€ You stood in front of him, arms crossed.
ā€œWhat?ā€
ā€œWhat are we doing? You and I. What is happening?ā€
His confusion was evident, his voice a mix of curiosity and bewilderment, ā€œWhat are you talking about?ā€
ā€œJd, donā€™t be a dick. You're distant. We barely talk. You havenā€™t even held my hand in a month. I feel like I've lost you. Have I done something wrong?ā€
Jd's sigh carried a weight, his figure rising from the bed. ā€œY/N, Iā€¦ā€ he hesitated, the words escaping him reluctantly, ā€œMy exā€” she hung her herself in front of me. It haunts me. I just feel guilty and I'm terrified that I might drive you to the same point.ā€
The room fell into a stunned silence, your mind grappling with the enormity of his confession. Your mouth opened to speak, only managing to stutter incoherently. Before he could continue, you closed the gap between you, enfolding him in a heartfelt embrace. Silence enveloped the room, broken only by the sound of your steady breaths. ā€œI had no idea,ā€ you whispered softly, your voice carrying a mixture of sympathy and understanding ā€œIā€™m sorry.ā€
ā€œItā€™s fine.ā€ Jd choked out, unsure exactly of what the emotions his brain was trying to process were. You shook your head against him slightly, still holding him in a hug, ā€œI canā€™t imagine how heavy that must feel.ā€
Jd winced, beginning to cry into your shoulder, tears starting to flow without reservation. That was the first time anyone has ever acknowledged how much pain he has experienced, ever. Your touch was a silent reassurance to him that he could let his guard down.
Amidst his quiet sobs, you murmured calmingly to him, ā€œShh, it's alright, Jd. You're not alone anymore. I'm here for you.ā€ Your voice was a steady presence, comfort in a way heā€™d received from no one except his mom when he was a kid.
As his tears subsided, you held him a little tighter, your fingers tracing soothing circles on his back. ā€œYou don't have to be afraid with me,ā€ you whispered, your words carrying the weight of your sincerity. ā€œI'm not your ex, Jd. I just want to see you happy.ā€
His grip on you tightened, his vulnerability a testament to the trust he was beginning to place in you. He gave you a watery smile. ā€œThank you,ā€ he managed to whisper, his voice raw, ā€œyou wanna just stay here tonight?ā€ He asked. You nodded, getting comfortable in his bed.
A/N: LMFAO Iā€™m so sorry this is SHIT but I had already left it sitting in my inbox so long and I didnā€™t wanna keep u waiting any longer. I kinda gave up with the end so sorry I hope itā€™s okay I tried to stick as closely as I could to the request šŸ˜­šŸ«¶šŸ¼
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ashironie Ā· 7 months ago
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spoilers for tmagp ep 12. im making this on tuesday then relistening and adding more thursday.
iā€™ll be doing 2 in front of every thought i had on my second listen
Alex doing the title card? maybe a norris case? mayhaps?
2 Is getting of in relation to the bonzo lap dance turned dismemberment?
oh god.. first ep without a transcriptā€¦ what the actual fuck are they saying
2 Oh thank god i have the transcriptā€¦ sam actually got some rizz
celia and sam in the off room? i assume thatā€™s why itā€™s so FUCKING ECHOY
2 Panting? man this guy is out of shape
2 awwww i kinda heard this part my first listen through </3. Alice unrequitedly loves Sam and Sam unrequitedly love Celia who unrequitedly loves Lena who unrequitedly loves Gwen who unrequitedly loves Alice (i donā€™t ship half these but it is funny to joke about imo)
2 SAM IS SUCH A CHARMER I NO LONGER WANT HIM TO DIE FIRST (sorry colin, looks like your up, and so is your time)
awwww, celam fans are gonna eat good with this one
my headphones are also broke so i canā€™t hear jack
ALICE YAY!!!!
2 something about alice makes tmagp 10x more understandable
aw but you love him for it :7
SHE IS JEALOUS!!!
he is so not over the institute, sam and alice are alike like that, heā€™s not over tmi sheā€™s not over him
awwww alice stop being such a pessimist! like please do say it, i want sam to get out of this bullshit alive as much as you but likeā€¦ yk
2 OH MY GOD ā€œim sure celia would just love thatā€ SALT IN THE WOUND SAM SALT IN THE WOUND!!! SHES IN LOVE WITH YOU YOU IDIOT DONT TALK ABOUT YOUR CRUSH IN FRONT OF HER!!!!
NORRIS!!! I WAS RIGHT!
norris sounds so robotic, i think i even heard him skip a bit. itā€™s either jonny is too much of a theater kid, or this is actually important to the lore. norris being less human, sounding less emotive, maybe a bit sad? hm? maybe a bit lonely?
2 the skip is on the words ā€œPolicy Number: 548651-656ā€ and on ā€œ2024ā€ or more specifically the numbers, which isnā€™t important in donā€™t think, but really does remind me of tts
fraud?? ooooooOooooOOOOooooo
ha ā€œacting in good faithā€
2 love the way Alex says dickheads, itā€™s so specific and so pointed
hey i know what a stag is!! i watch a british bitch give one to a 70yo! (its a bachelor(ette) party, im pretty sure)
a lunch box? OH MY GOD BONZO! IS IT BONZO OH MY GOD BONZO?
2 donā€™t you DARE insult my dear dear comic sans
YES BONZO!!! MR BONZOS ON HIS WAY HE WANTS TO STAY HE WANT TO PLAY!!!
wait why does lena want him murdered?
YES IT WONT TURN OFF!!!
wait cheer?
ew, i hate bonzo
ewā€¦
HUG IT WHY ARE YOU HUGGING IT?
ohhhhh it looks not bad
JOEYS BOOTS????
OH MY GOD IS THAT WHO LENA WANTS DEAD?
OR THAT GUY WHOS STAG IT IS
2 ā€œJust then the googly eyes turned to me,ā€ im sorry but that will never not be funny. i am both disgusted by bonzo and think everything he does is hilarious.ļæ¼
oh god
ewwwwww
WHY ARE THEY LAUGHING? oh they didnā€™t know
wow dude i feel like thatā€™s overkill bonbon
dut do
why is this SO visiral?
2 ugghhh i love the voice acting
His teeth are not soft
alex saying ā€œbonzoā€¦? bonzo bonzo?ā€ is absolutely hilarious (although i donā€™t think it can top jonnyā€™s ā€œbaaaaaā€)
ā€œnone of us were left wholeā€ WOW DUDE YOU LOST YOUR FUCKIN HAND?
AW SHIT
YEAH SUE EM! SUE EM TO HELL!
GWEN!
HAHA ALICE YES
AHHHH DYHARD MOMENT DYHARD MOMENT!!!
ALICE WAS SERIOUS!!!!
ALICE IS TRYING TO COMFORT GWEN AWWWWWWWW!!!
SERIOUS TALK!
THAT LITTLE GWEN LAUGH!!!!!
I WAS SO SCARED WE WOULDNT SEE GWEN
awww gwen getting her hopes up that alice isnā€™t fucking with her, so cute
YES!
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so2uv Ā· 11 months ago
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@ so2uv's sappy time.
end of the year. ive survived and that's scary but you know what? it'll be fine. we'll all be fine and im promising that; whether it be this year, the next, or far in the future, we'll be ok :)) it's stupid how this platform, one that my friends teased me for using, left such an impact on me as a person.
AKA. MY END OF YEAR MUTUAL APPRECIATION POST. (warning: these got long and sort emotional for me to write. well, as emotional as i can get fjkdhgkjfd. sorry if my coherence gets lost later on. forgive me if you weren't mentioned specifically for something; i have more mutuals that expected. it's genuinely surprising.)
if you weren't mentioned specifically, there's still a note for you at the bottom. sorry for making you scroll for long to find it :'DD
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š–£‚ ā”ˆ āŸ” Ė’ @tiredsleep . . . the mutual who has stuck through it all. oh tired. tired, tired, tired. i think im a little stupid for how happy i get when you like a post or send an ask or keyboard smash in my reblogs. a lot of what i said in my long ask to you a while back is what im trying to convey now. the way we met wasn't through much special; i followed you and eventually you followed back. it was slow going in the ways we interacted but the nicest things take time and im so glad we're the way we are now. we're strangers, two little guys on the internet, and i think it's beautiful how we have this. you're an amazing writer, an all around amazing creator of the worlds you build and the characters you create. i don't think you realized how envious i used to be of you; you made it seem like it was easy enough for you to connect with others, your writing was something id never achieve with mine, it was flat out jealousy. it was my fault we were distant to begin with. i soon figured out that praise was correct: you are among the most wonderful people ive had the pleasure of knowing and talking to you, even if it's just through a screen. there's so much more for me to say that i constantly struggle to put into the correct words to get the point across. just know that you have great things out there for you. have a great new year, tired. we'll make it. im so proud of you.
š–£‚ ā”ˆ āŸ” Ė’ @aelatus . . . the last standing mutual of all my og (close) mutuals. hello atlas! im not sure if you'll ever see this on tumblr since i know you don't log on much but you've been my mutual through three blog changes now; was there for my xstar-kidx era and kozmiixs stage. we've been through shit together, had banter about grammarly together, lost certain mutuals together, have changed blogs, changed themes, switched fandoms, fell out of love with fandoms. it's been a wild couple of years, huh? im so thankful we've met and got close in the ways that we did and that we're able to call each others close. your birthday is soon so in the case that i forget to say this on discord: happy birthday, the xiao to my albedo. live a life of freedom and joy, my love /p.
š–£‚ ā”ˆ āŸ” Ė’ @izukxnnie . . . hara :((( i don't think you'll ever come to read this message but that's alright; maybe it's for the better kdfgh. i know i sent you that long winded ask on your blog already but i miss talking and interacting with you, even with all my awkwardness. im still so regretful of that one time i sent a request to join your world but then you were busy and i didn't read your messages until later that day as in hours later bc i was at school and idk if i ever responded to them in the end. maybe i'll send you a message on discord later. maybe i won't bc i'll be too sentimental. i really hope you're doing more than well, that you're happy doing what you do.
š–£‚ ā”ˆ āŸ” Ė’ @ay-asterisms . . . the mutual who introduced me to so many others. i really have you to thank for what i have now, ay. truly. you brought me deeper into the hq fandom and introduced me to jennie, atlas, and others. we don't talk much but i'll say what ive mentioned before, you remind me so much of the sun. but not as the bringer of life and the ball we see every morning; a sun in the sense that you're a star closer to earth but still a star, still out there where there are multiple. the difference is that you just happen to bring a warmth that others can't provide for ones nearby.
š–£‚ ā”ˆ āŸ” Ė’ @cryo-locket / @lo-cinno . . . you. im not even sure how we became mutuals, and my memory is pretty good. we just spawned in each other's zones one day and went yeah, alright. honestly, ive never said this to anyone, but you were one of the reasons i decided to focus more heavily on chinese. our interactions reminded me of why i wanted to relearn the language for myself: for the social connections. i genuinely love talking to you and always find myself laughing at our conversations. mainly because our timezone dif is so odd so it's always late in the evening when im on. your ebg was so fun and with all the pain it brought / hj, im so happy to have been part of it. thank you for putting up with my 2 am rambles and crack, hope you found laugh or two with them.
š–£‚ ā”ˆ āŸ” Ė’ @pr3tty-jennie . . . you intimidated me when we first met. i still remember it actually: you had that kamninari theme and the most recent post on your blog was about how you couldn't remember the word for chandelier in english but knew it in french. you've been through so much, endured so much, and i respect you so much. always have, always will. your life story and the past don't define who you show as a person and im so amazed by that part of you. have a good day, good week, good rest of your life pretty girl :DD
š–£‚ ā”ˆ āŸ” Ė’ @june-again . . . it's crazy, you know? crazy how far we've both drifted off from the original fandom that brought us together? but that's character development. speaking of that, ive gotten the absolute pleasure of seeing you grow as a person and go through the motions of life. it's always chill talking to you, jokes come easy hah! you're an amazing musician, june. amazing person, amazing at writing, amazing at music; you're outstanding so in the words of Freddy fazbear from security break, way to go superstar! i knew you could do it and i know you still can.
š–£‚ ā”ˆ āŸ” Ė’ @junjiie . . . the seungmin to my minho, the other half of 2min, the self proclaimed jeno to my renjun (have yet to be a dreamzen my b :(() and the no. 1 solieber. i was serious when i said you're the reason my other blog exists; you've been the biggest hype person when it came down to me going out of my comfort zone and writing. i was so nervous going up to talk to you at first kjfdhgkj but now, you're just another silly guy in my phone screen :DD thank you for sending all your updates about life and putting up with mine even though they never get answered- seungmin to not only my minho, but hyunjin too, let's keep being #Silly, yeah?? it's already the actual new years day when you're receiving this so i hope the year is off to a good start.
š–£‚ ā”ˆ āŸ” Ė’ @sohyuki . . . MINT im hoarding the ask that you sent me on christmas day. im always so happy when you've shown up on dash and while im sad about how you've let tumblr mainly behind, i know it's for the better since well, interactions have been shit and probably will never get back up to the standard we held them to, even with all the effort put in. you are such an amazing all around person and like i said in my christmas note to you, keep writing. hoard it, feed into it, you have something wonderful going on with it.
š–£‚ ā”ˆ āŸ” Ė’ @kamiyatos . . . user kamiyatos!!! lee!!! HELLO!!! it's always such a pleasure to talk to you and i hope you know that i keep your ramble about malleus' character and your plot idea for him in the back of my mind constantly, even though that ask has been lost to my actions of deactivation on my old blog. you're the biggest ayato fan i know who supports my works about him vocally AND you understand my vision on his personality... it's truly touching, y'know? thank you for being there, even when we don't talk as much as we should. i hope this year has been kind on you and the next one is even kinder.
š–£‚ ā”ˆ āŸ” Ė’ @yinyinggie . . . yingyingyingyingerkjshkjfdg ok this may come as a shock, or maybe you already knew and were just playing along, but we used to be mutuals before the summer of last year. secret identity revealed ig?? eh im sure if you dig far enough into my dark pastā„¢ļø you'll find smth about it so im not going to say anything about it :P but! one thing has stayed the same for sure: you are so easy and so fun to talk to and make conversation with. you know that ramble i left on the astro twerk form about feedback for the server? yeah. im 100% truthful. you've made something so inclusive and positive, have done to much to get tumblr active, please know that your efforts aren't wasted. im sure they feel like it at times but i appreciate it so much. and im sure others have the same sentiment.
š–£‚ ā”ˆ āŸ” Ė’ @mhiieee . . . MHIEEEEEEEE MY SCARA FAN !!!! i love and adore your works so much and not to mention your characterization of scaramouche is top tier. ive got a lot to learn from you, mhie; i don't think you realize how much there is to admire when it comes to you as a person. you find such meaning and connection in the words and the world, the sincerity that comes with it,,,,, it makes me want to sob and roll around while also simultaneously wanting to take your brain apart neuron by neuron and psychoanalyze you. not in the freudian way though. ive had the greatest honor of being able to interact with you on not just one, but two!!! servers!!! i think it's a little silly how much i smile when you reply to smth dumb ive said on disc. have a great new year :))
š–£‚ ā”ˆ āŸ” Ė’ @ryuryuryuyurboat . . . RYUUUUUU literally the most stunning person to walk the planet ever like. hello??? our first interactions came from that ebg funny enough. does a little ā˜…šŸŖ½ anon ring a bell? i only ever got around to sending you one sabo during that time but i hope you did enjoy what i came up with on the spot, i never was very good when it came down to kaeya's character. you are so intelligent and such an amazing individual, please always remember that.
š–£‚ ā”ˆ āŸ” Ė’ @snobwaffles / @2nobwaffles . . . SNOB SNOB SNOB i always think of the pokemon when your name comes up. in my head, you will always be snom, the bug-ice type pokemon <33 IT'S SO FUN TALKING TO YOU and we haven't been mutuals for long either. im always thinking of the advice you left me when it came down to my rant about an irls party and there's something about the way you're able to appreciate and take note and find beauty int he smallest of things that get brought up. i wish you the complete best that 2024 has to off you. keep calm and snob on :DD
š–£‚ ā”ˆ āŸ” Ė’ @itaerae & @mins-fins . . . im putting the two of you together because well, i met you both at the same time through the server. while i can't consider it and, ive never really had such an inviting time in a server, much less a network, as ive had in zumblr. really, it's you two that i owe thanks to. our silly little convos are so fun and im forever thankful that ive found people to talk to on a server for once.
š–£‚ ā”ˆ āŸ” Ė’ @https-furina . . . the best server mother fr!!! omg it's so nice talking to you :((( i love the warmth of your words and how your emotions shine through text. it feels like i can practically envision the fond eyeball or the warm smile that you may or may not have on your face when messaging. iā€™ve had such a great time in the network and your pet names fjfbdjdbjdb have a great 2024 heh :DD
š–£‚ ā”ˆ āŸ” Ė’ @lethwal & @astrinityy . . . i don't think you guys realize how fun it was when we were all "debating" and accusing me of being a furry. honestly, i haven't had to stifle laughter like that in the middle of the night as hard as i did for a small while. not too long but long enough. it was a breath of fresh air and it was genuinely amazing to just be able to put the present on the back burner and play around like that. even though it was kind of late for me when that was happening- ignore that. it's always late for me when im online atp. i hope we can get past those baseless accusations you have both placed on me tehe. have a happy new years, you two. ALSO YIXIN!! GA-MING PROTECTION SQUAD RISEEEEE
š–£‚ ā”ˆ āŸ” Ė’ @/zumblr . . . there's so many of you and i can't find the proper words to express the welcome i felt when added to the server. it was nerve wracking, ive never really gotten around to talking to that many people or being that open on the internet before. it's funny how one summer can bring you out of your shell a little, eh? and all bc of some guys on screen lmao. thank you for the support and im happy to have met such wonderful people. thank you, again. @urielphix I AM. DETERMINED TO READ ADAD JUST YOU WAIT
š–£‚ ā”ˆ āŸ” Ė’ @ everyone else, all my mutuals as of now and past, who weren't mentioned or mutuals who want to read something again . . . hello!! im sorry to disappoint by not adding you properly and for not giving a personalized thanks; it wasn't anything against it you at all. reason 1) i probably forgot as um. goldfish brain or 2) we just became mutuals pretty recently and haven't had the chance to really talk much / have been sort of long term but haven't talked much.
either way though, thanks for sticking around! im not the most. literate person. sometimes LMAO and im far from being a proud person of skill when it comes to the right words to say to people but im always happy when people find something worth it in my silly words. i hope we get to interact more in the future, as long as you can put up with my inconsistent (to say the least) replies and brain boggling posts that come from the depths of the midnight zone, that is. get ready for the ride that is this. clusterfuck of a blog place. LMAO,,,, if you haven't already scrolled through my stuff. if you have then um ready for more??? fkdjhgkjlghf
if you've made it to the end, thank you. and why?? im not that interesting or cool as everyone makes me out to be. if you had told 2019 me on tumblr that 4 years later, id be posting my works for everyone to see and also be proud of my own poetry, i would have laughed and called you absolutely insane. some of you have sat through me going through different gender and pronoun crises on dash back in 2020, and some of you ive only met this month.
whatever our situation is, i wish all the best for everyone . iā€™ll support you guys until the end of the earth and then some. have the happiest of happy new years, may your futures always be brighter than you say they are, and iā€™ll see you later šŸ’›
sincerely ā€” sol / jun
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maukiki1-but-cringefail Ā· 7 months ago
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Rating Aguma screenshots from my gallery (because theres no other fury character that was drawn more inconsistently than him and also im bored out of my mind)
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Vicious. Ominous. Bro is about to actually fucking kill someone. I mean he always looks like hes about to kill someone but this is something else. Whyd bro switch so quick. You know Id make the ā€œyou aint got one battle where you needa be this seriousā€ joke but since hes a legendary blader he does but not this one bro. Its just ginga and yuki calm your ass. Id count the amount of wrinkles on your forehead but i dont have enough fingers for that. Plus points for the face scrunch. Minus points for not having the majoras mask clocktower bell noise when this exact frame shows up. 9/10
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What is this. Atrocious. UNACCEPTABLE. What the fuck happened to his face. You look like a rabid dog. He always does but like here? God damn now i get why my friend calls you mulch. You look like a bear who just woke up from hibernation. Can you like, be dumbfounded and baffled normally. God damn. Are you not like a grown ass man. Dumbass. Be normal 2/10
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My goodness gracious. Absolutely mischievous. Plotting. Looks like hes about to kill someone again. Please back off a little bit. Fw energy tho bro is enjoying the fight for sure 9/10
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Im filing a restraining order get him away from me 0/10
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What is this. Explain yourself. Im sorry is this like, a cycnus impression. Cauze you look like a fucking bug rn. Like straight up. Your pupils are not supposed to be that big and your eyes are not supposed to be that sparkly. You are not the tbh creature. Stop this madness 5/10
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Okay when i first saw this while watching the scene i laughed for a solid ten minutes because he wasnt even the focus at the moment (bao was talking) and my eye slipped and saw this and oh god. He looks like a cardboard cutoutšŸ˜­he looks like hed stiffly fall over and shatter to a billion pieces if you poked himšŸ˜­šŸ˜­he looks like hed disintegrate into dust if someone touched himšŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­bro is COOKED if i flip the canvas.šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­this is horrendous i know hes ugly but this isnt my aguma bring the real one back . Hes so uneven. One point for absolute horrendous image resolution 1/10
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EHUM. EUGH. EUGHEGHEHEUEGAGSHDGSVGWUWYWHSK. The fuckinšŸ˜­šŸ˜­thešŸ˜­šŸ˜­the. ThešŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­thehis eyes are about to pop out of their sockets someone help this manAND HELP ME TOO WHILE YOURE AT ITšŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­ohmygdodudgshsjsgaha. Context is even funnier this is when he loses to tithi and hes on the ground defeated tweaking the fuck out LMFAOOOšŸ˜­šŸ˜­bro is fuming with rage bcs he lost to a kid i hate him i hope he dies a billion times and then he dies again. Thank god dynamis was there or he mightā€™ve actually killed someone 10/10
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Unbothered. Moisturized. Happy. In My Lane. Focused. Flourishing. Actually i take it back this dude is never unbothered . The hair šŸ˜­šŸ˜­ wet fucking dog go to hell 8/10
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Amazing. life changing. phenomenal. incredible. awesome. wonderful. marvelous. Outstanding. THE screenshot. The first and only screenshot ever taken. THE one. I filled my gallery up with this exact image by duplicating it (there was about a thousand of the same image) (my friends called it ā€œdog blockadeā€) and also set it as my wallpaper as a joke and its still the same because i forgot to change it. At first i was scared of it because he was so close to the screen and i was met with this fucking picture everytime i exited out of an app. But now i have become emotionally attached to it like hes just saying hi to me everytime i quit an app. The emotional support screenshot. I take what i said about the tbh creature back. Why cant he look like this all the timešŸ˜”the eyes the :3 mouth. Scene context is also so funny ā€œaguma. are you coming:)ā€ ā€œmmhmm :3ā€ ?????182^2^72[Ā£^Ā£]2]ā‚¬ Everything is perfect no complaints. 10000000000000000000/10
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This image will be the cauze of my untimely death. No comment. -āˆš7ā“/10
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theerurishipper Ā· 1 year ago
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Marinette a cruel person tbh. Even a psychopath or hell maybe im raising the bar a little too high but a stranger would be able comfort ChatNoir seeing his situation. The New York special and him spiraling made me despise her because someone fucking died to make this partnership work.... this isn't even inconsistent characterization from past seasons this is very consistent she's always been like this. Girl ain't willing to even see what underneath the mask eh? or believe he has other things to do besides fucking risking his life as a teenager im surprised their dynamic lasted as long as they did because she comes off very cold when it comes to her partner compared to Alya. Why she like that hell if I know had it been me i'd cuss her out or at least tell her off. How the hell you don't comfort a human being when they show their insecurities I don't know especially someone you've worked along with that saves paris numerous times.
I gotta ask if Chat Noir was more vocal and angry and actually lost it on her would it finally stick it in her damn head that he isn't someone who pops into existence defeating akumas but a very real boy underneath? You know I have know fucking clue personally what is so hard for her about that being a respectful partner and understanding that Chat is human. I remembered in origins he took more of a leading approach I think sorry my memory is dogcrap these days and yet he encouraged her and gave her confidence what so hard returning the favor back?
I mean, comparing her to Chloe? That's like choosing between a rock and a hard place. Chloe's got that villainess aura, sure, but at least she's upfront about it what expectation is there to be had for a cannon fodder villain like Chloe with a creator who hater her to the point even in-universe she still the story punching bag . Now Marinette, oh please, she's got this pristine "heroine white lotus" thing going on. It's like she can do no wrong, and the world just eats it up.
And don't get me started on Ephemeral. Talk about a masterclass in betrayal! She pulls a stunt that would make Judas proud, corrupts herself with power, and what? No consequences, no rules, just a free pass to wreak havoc. Must be nice living in Marinette's world where the rules only apply to us mere mortals.
And let's not forget her emotional boy toys, Luka and Adrien, just waiting there like loyal lapdogs, ready to clean up the mess she leaves behind. It's the Marinette show, and everyone else is just playing supporting roles in her drama.
But hey, who needs nuance when you've got that heroine Marinette halo shining so bright? It's the perfect excuse for her to mess up royally, and everyone will still be there, cheering her on with no accountability taken . The world's her playground, and we're just living in it.
I'm sorry for ranting it's just im done with her sorry if I made it negative for you.
Calling her a psychopath is too harsh ngl. I disagree with you on that. I don't think we should be throwing around words like that lightly.
But I do agree with your overall point. Very harsh, but pretty close to the mark. I also personally wouldn't compare her to Chloe, but then again, that all went out of the window after the Season 5 finale. I wouldn't call her cruel or evil, but she does benefit from the protagonist centered morality the show adopted in Season 4. Chat Noir shouldn't expect anything from her, and he should apologize for her mistakes because she can do no wrong. It sucks.
Thank you for your ask!
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yongislong Ā· 2 years ago
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remind me.
genre: non!idol kun x reader established relationship tings, mostly fluff but kinda angsty, comfort
cw/note: insecurities about looks and abilities, mentions of working out, bad eating habits, anxiety a bit, light descriptions of a depressive episode, reader is mentioned wearing makeup, tysm anon! i hope you're doing okay and this could bring you a little bit of comfort wherever you are. im sorry for not being as active recently, im going thru it lol. love doesn't fix everything ofc but i hope this makes someone feel better
he'd caught you finally sleeping peacefully.
kun had noticed you waking up extra early to go on runs. he's seen you replace meals with protein bars and shakes. he'd also seen you withdraw from yourself. spending extra care avoiding your reflection in the mirror when you stepped out of the shower with him.
this is the first time in a long time, that kun has seen you take steady breaths and not worry about what you look like.
your eyelashes hit the apple of your cheek that's squished against his bicep you landed on during the night. he kept his right hand rested on your hipbone, running his thumb in circles along your warm skin. his left hand, free from the weight of your head, is busy twirling the ends of your hair into ringlets.
he wanted you to sleep for as long as you wanted, but he couldn't help but press the softest and lightest kiss to your puffed out pout. seeing you take in a sharp breath, stirring in your sleep he coos lightly and squeezes the side of your hip he was holding.
you rub your cheek on his bicep and he chuckles, a smile makes it way on your lips at the sound, you flutter your eyes open, looking up at kun through your lashes. he looks down at you with such adoration it kind of makes you want to hide and apologize.
he could see how far away you were beginning to get, how lost in your thoughts you go again. how hazy and glossy your eyes got and how quickly you snapped back into that mindset again. he wished you could hold on to the innocence and unknowing when you first wake up. he found that this was maybe the best time to ask.
"what's going on in that pretty little head of yours, hm?" he rasps, as he traces your hairline with his pointer finger.
"hmhph... nothing?"
"you're a really bad liar y/n" he bares a sad smile, you downcast your gaze and he follows his head down to catch your eyes back, capturing your chin with right hand that rested on your lower waist, pointer finger and thumb pulling you up to his brown eyes.
"i know..." he could feel you physically crumbling.
you hid your face in his chest once you saw how his gaze carried a sea of worry he squeezes you as a sense of reassurance, allowing you to finally let him know what was going on with you.
kun always had a way of making you confess what was wrong. you always felt so guilty for wanting to hide your emotions and troubles from him because he's always been so mature about stuff like that. so patient and willing to wait. never pressing you for answers. just leaving slight hints that he knows more than what he leads on, and that he's gonna be here to solve the problem.
this cycle has repeated a few times before as your relationship progressed. you both got into the swing of gauging what to do once you, or him, got into moods like this where you felt like the way you looked and behaved was nothing to be loved or proud of.
still hiding your face from him, you start, "i feel like im lying to everyone kun. even you. i do my makeup to look better, i stay awake longer to study and cramp knowing there's no point because i'm just bad at math anyway, no clothes look okay on me and i feel like the way i'm handling things is constantly making everything everyone else's problem. im too loud, i can't stand eating anymore and i don't feel like doing anything anymore."
you chocked back a sob and continued with the support of kun's hand tracing up and down your spine, "-and i don't know what to do because you've never made me feel like i should view myself negatively or- or dwell on things i can't change, but i just, wan't control back... i hate feeling like you are forced to deal with me because you're scared of how i'll react or what i'll do. i get so in my head and i can't ever seem to slow the gears from turning..."
he could tell there was more you wanted to say. but it seems as though you couldn't put into words all that your body and mind felt, feelings too big to put into human language.
"im sorry, i just" you huff, "i- i don't know... what to do anymore kun, im sorry i keep neglecting myself, i, ugh, i hate making you worry! im sorry, i really really am," your voice was so small.
his shirt was soaked at this point. his own tears falling down his chin and landing on the back of your neck he'd dug his head into while you ranted.
his soft voice broke through your whimpers, "i know love, i know, its not your fault. it's okay to feel like this sometimes. i'm not going to sit here and tell you that i don't lie awake at night wondering if you've eaten or if work is going okay for you. there were times where i wanted nothing but to sit with you and make all your meals for you, making sure you ate, and even waking up before you to interrogate you about your running habits. there were so many scenarios and ideas running through my head about how i wanted to comfort you but i never wanted you to feel smothered. i really do hope you know that i've noticed, and i really and truly believe that you're the most beautiful person i've gotten the privilege of making coffee for, showering with, laughing with, knowing, everything. i love it when you sit in bed barefaced, i love it when you wear the color red, i love it when you come to me for help, i love bragging about how cool and pretty you are to people, i love bragging about how my partner could become a model if they really wanted to because they're-" peck "just" peck "that" peck "gorgeous, inside and out, as corny as that is."
he ends his sentiment with a large smile, knocking both of your noses together as you both giggle.
you cover your face with both palms.
circling his hands over your wrist, he slowly pulls them away.
"don't," he whispers, holding eye contact.
"you don't need to change anything about your appearance to keep me entertained?? okay? your body is the least important thing about you... it does help how hot it is but..."
smack!
"ow!! its true!! ugh okay okay," his smile widens as he sees how free you look for the first time in a while. head thrown back as far as the position allows, eyes crinkled as he feels the spot where his hand rested on your waist scrunch and twist with every way you giggled. he poked and prodded and the skin, making a blush dust over the apples of your cheeks.
"i hope i can be that for you too, qian kuunnn" you drag his name out, so prettily, he feels like he's gonna melt right into the bed onto the floor.
"oh trust me, you do more for me than i've ever done for you, you have no idea, really," he says, more seriously than you had seen him since yangyang spilled coffee all over is electric keyboard months back.
"you know i'd literally buy the moon for you, right. like walk over hot coals, help hide a body for you type shit," he admits through giggles and red cheeks.
"im always going to be here to remind though, incase you forget."
hitting his chest playfully, you mumble a sentence joking about how instead, he should reward you with more cuddles since he made you cry so early on a thursday morning.
he obliges happily, grabbing your thigh and slinging you leg over his waist. making it easier to tuck you into him fully. he smells like pistachios and carmel. his hands are so soft against the back of your head. he lulls you to sleep by whispering cheesy lines about how perfect you are and how nothing you could do or the way you look could ever change his perception of you that he's crafted. he runs kisses along the under side of your jaw, all the way to the end of your shoulder just before you fully knock out.
yeah, your boyfriend is kinda a romantic.
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stormyoceans Ā· 10 months ago
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vv brainrot continuation:
dad, I missed you (mom, I missed you)
that cute "feels so good" sound (pink drink, I really want to try it)
hugs in bed are the same as after joobā€™s funeral
part 3/4 damn music from vice versa! aof, fuck, just admit everything already!
we got lost (and found our local glasshouse)
bonfires and songs with guitar
return of shirts (and they smell like each other. what could be more erotic)
interrupted kiss (okay, not because of bad breath)
the description of the sky is worthy of rawiā€™s palette the guys were right, this damn miss universe appeared before our eyes. lord, I'm not completely alive, monica. what about you? you know, maybe sea didnā€™t lie, and the remaining episodes wonā€™t be sad even despite the breakup, bc the worst and most expected has already happened, and then everything will go easier. william's song brought me to tears, it's beautiful! and I liked day's version. its so romantic. but, forgive me, the bed scene could have been much better, the angles and amount of blur didnā€™t turn out very well, and, tbh, I expected more tactility from day, so that he could study morkā€™s body with his hands. it was so important to him, but they showed it to us very quickly and didnā€™t spend enough time on it. but I really liked that they were presented as switch, moving away from the nightmare clichĆ©s, it's great. the scene on the mountain is the pinnacle of it all, and lord knows the boys pulled it off superbly. it was so emotional. I crumbled like sand and donā€™t know how Iā€™ll recover by next week. monica, share your brainrot, Iā€™m sure I missed everything possible bc I was so busy in the bed scene.
SORRY PINKYBRAIN IM AFRAID IM GONNA BE COMPLETELY USELESS THIS TIME AROUND I SWEAR I EVEN TRIED TO REWATCH THE EPISODE TO PICK UP MORE PARALLELS BUT I ONLY ENDED UP SOBBING ON THE FLOOR WHILE CLUTCHING A BUNCH OF SCREENSHOTS TO MY CHEST
and you've already pointed out all of these moments but allow me to put them side by side anyway because!!!!!!!
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[CHANTS] COMFORT SHIPS COMFORT SHIPS COMFORT SHIPS PORTRAYED BY THE MOST COMFORT BOYS JUST SO COMFORT SHAPED COMFORT SHIPS!!!!!!!!!
and even if these two moments canā€™t really be compared THEY INVENTED EMOTIONAL FOREHEAD TOUCHES TOO!!!!!!!!
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my personal emotional devastation aside, tho, i do think there are some parallels to be drawn between episode 9 of vice versa and episode 9 of last twilight, between puen on an island finally accepting his life in the original universe and by the end "gaining sight" on who talay really is, and day on a mountain finally accepting going blind and having his last sight being mork. i also think it's interesting that in last twilight (the ost) at one point there's the line "my heart cherishes the memory of us" while in vice versa the very last line of friend credits' second movie is "though we aren't together tomorrow, you're always here in my memories". like idk if it's a reach but both shows are about seeing when you can't really see (not just in the literal physical sense) and acceptance and carrying this love that helped you through it all with you and i just think someone with a brain activity currently higher than my own could make some connections!!!!!!!!
i personally did like the sex scene (i've talked about it here a little if you're interested), but i think i also get what you mean. if it were for me we would definitely have gotten a 17 minutes long one take focused on day's hands as he traced every part of mork's body starting from his face and slowly making his way down to his feet. but at the same time i wonder if it would have made sense for their first time. i feel like day was already so preoccupied with his sight being almost gone that what he needed in that moment was to get lost in the feelings rather than commit mork's body to memory. and who knows, last twilight has already broken pā€™aofā€™s habit of having only a couple of kisses in his shows, maybe it will make him give us another intimate scene too!!!
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clippy Ā· 6 months ago
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i hope this isnt rude or insensitive to ask, but is the car you just lost the one you had feelings for, or was that a previous car? sorry for your loss either way :(
oh no it's fine to ask lol... but that was my previous car (Miles, who was a 2005 Honda Civic)
the car im in the process of losing (Lawrence, the 2019 Honda Civic) well... i viewed us as being ambivalent toward one another, but no strong feelings in any direction, unlike my relationship with Miles where i do genuinely feel like there was some form of connection there... also i think my feelings toward Clockboy absolutely complicated things w Lawrence but blah blah blah
i was very torn up when losing Miles and kinda just feel... eh about losing Lawrence, where most of the negative emotions are related to financial worry rather than the equivalent to losing a loved one
it does suck though because Lawrence was still so new. we just hit 50,000 miles about a month ago. he got good gas mileage, handled well on the highway, all that jazz... also like, i picked him out because 10th gen civics are sexy, and since 10th gen civics are the 2016-2020 models, it'll probably be a long time before i can own another one which does bum me out a little bit
but yeah im kinda tempering my expectations on what car #3 will be. i want something reliable, but dunno what i want yet. definitely know i wont be buying a New vehicle again right away (financially cannot do that right now) and i want a significantly lower car payment. like it'll be bonus points if the car i end up getting is one i find appealing, but then again, i admittedly did not find Miles attractive at first lmfao.
so we shall see what ends up happening! i am trying my best to remain optimistic and will just be so relieved once i have the keys to a car under my name again
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strwberri-milk Ā· 2 years ago
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Could you do headcanons about kaeya meeting a female reader from another (fantasy) world that makes him believe in the concept of "soulmates"
How would she be like? And what powers does she have?
Hello!! This is a little shorter since I wanted to keep it pretty general BUT the way that this is basically how I came up with the premise of Sinner(')s Desire so Im :DD but yea - i didnt wanna give too many details as it is a reader insert i didnt wanna!! make it too specific but i hope you like it nonethelss!!
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I think Kaeya approaches everything with a healthy dose of skepticism. He's sure you're right and you're at least not from Mondstat but that doesn't automatically point towards you being from another world entirely!
You always behave a little differently towards him than the others, your hesitance to get close to people seeming not as severe when you see Kaeya. He can see how you relax a little, delve a little more into your life, and even though he doesn't quite believe you right now, that doesn't mean he's completely writing you off.
At first, he thinks he needs to keep an eye out for safety. You're clearly at least a security threat, or could be if you are from another world. But, you're always trying not to be. He finds the way you do your best not to be intrusive and dance around anything that could possibly incriminate you both suspicious and endearing. You're trying not to set off his concern, but inadvertently doing so by being too cautious.
It's not until you shyly invite him out on a date. Just over to Windrise. He guesses it's not the worst place he could go - after all, Knights patrol the area regularly and it's close enough to the main city that were anything to happen he should hopefully not be put out. He's ignoring the fact that you asking him out makes his heart flutter, getting dressed for the occasion with a bit of a shake in his hands.
"Thanks for meeting me here," you say shyly, already having set out a blanket with food for a picnic.
"Of course but I wonder why you didn't just come with me? I'd be more than happy to escort you."
He sits down next to you, noticing that you've done your best to pick foods he might like. You nervously begin unwrapping something from the basket and take a bite, laughing a little.
"Well, I know you don't quite believe me and I didn't want to scare you off or make you think I would hurt you. I really like you after all."
Kaeya chuckles lightly, shaking his head just a bit.
"And why is that? We barely know each other and..."
He stops, noticing the grass around you begin to glow with small lights. He doesn't think lamp grass should be out here, not in this volume and when he looks back to your face the lights go out immediately. You turn away, trying to avert his gaze.
"Sorry! My magic has been acting strangely since I got here. I'm not sure how to get it under control but since it's linked to my emotions I think I just need to try and calm down."
You fiddle with your fingers, the lights returning but this time dimmer. Now, it washes over the blanket gently, reminding him more of fireflies floating around.
"Do you miss home?" he asks after a while, not expecting you to shake your head.
"At times, but I know I was brought here for a reason."
He's not sure what you're trying to imply, wanting to interrogate you further before pausing. He takes in the scenery around him, how at peace he feels in your presence and the cute look on your face as you try to cut some fruit neatly for him to eat. It makes something in him want to get to know you better, in a more genuine way, so lost in his thoughts he almost misses the faint string of light connecting your wrists.
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