#im sorry if i reblogged anything weird i genuinely dont have the brain power to read rn but i still wanted to get some tumblr in b4 sleepin
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It's 3am
I come to tumblr
I reblog almost every post i see for 5 min
I leave
#im sorry if i reblogged anything weird i genuinely dont have the brain power to read rn but i still wanted to get some tumblr in b4 sleepin#so if i enjoyed like the first 5 words of a post i reblogged it and i genuinepy dont know how they end#also im in the mood to write an extremely long rant in the comments about how im doing mentally and physically#which is#not great#but it changed bc i think it used to be that i felt mentally like shit and the body followed#now its physical chronic fatigue which makes me feel like shit mentally cause i cant do the stuff i want to#and i have to cancel meeting my friends#and take a one hour downhill walk with loads of breaks and need to lay down for 3 hours immediately after wards#i feel like everyone gets like 80 - 90 percent of life#and i get like 5#i get to be alive for so little#i do small things and im so so exhausted#i get to be alive for like#3-4 hours a day cumulative on a GOOD day#and then i just have to rest#i hate this shit#but also ill be fine#anyways#good night#time to sleep for 10 hours and hope to have a bit more energy tmrw
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graphic design is my passion actually the last time i made a graphic of any kind was when i was like 10 and i have sadly Not magically improved since then rip;; also dont worry the comic sans is ironic im not that awful......or am i
hey there angels (instead of demons bc ur not demons ur all angels get it haha), it’s me, ya maknae! this is a very looooooong post so buckle in, my pals
AHEM
exactly this time last year, i was probably laughing and/or crying at the thought of ever having mutuals here, much less having too many to do a proper follow forever in a rush the day before i post it (rip) so becAUSE i ran out of time and would probably give up in the middle, i decided to just talk abt how much i love everyone in the Stream Team gc and also make a shitty graphic so i could bless ur guys’ new years with ot13 and make it seem like i know what i’m doing :)
ok im gonna get sappy for a sec and then u can all get to the part u actually care about (the part that’s also sappy but directed at specific people)
my friends!! my loves!!! the bestest people on the planet!!!!! i love you <3<3 you guys are the sweetest, kindest, most understanding, most hilarious group of friends in the world and i’m so fucking lucky to know all of you. you make me laugh,,you make me cry (in a good way),,,,,you make me like myself when i dont feel like it,,,,im so?? blessed??? to have people to talk to and scream abt kpop with and be myself around. i’m more comfortable with u guys than probably anyone else?? like. even irl because 1) i’ll probably never come out, 2) none of my friends know anything abt kpop, and 3) none of my friends are rlly.....aware of the things my brain tells me about myself sometimes. which brings me to the last thing before i start yelling abt u all in alphabetical order:
thank you guys for being the Good Brains to help out when my Mean Brain gets too mean.
💙
@byungjoo
laura!! idk if u think abt this as often as i do (probably not) but like,, remember before we were friends and we had that ““discussion”” for abt .2 seconds regarding toppdogg going on the unit and then i thought u hated me for a couple weeks and then we became like the most amazing friends?? well reminding you of that is basically my long roundabout way of saying that our friendship is kind of a miracle to me, and i’m so so thankful that you’ve become someone i can trust with anything and not be judged for it :’) you always know what to say and you always make me feel special when we talk and just?? wow...don’t forget me when you become the biggest bts blog in the world......i saw one of your gifsets that had like 5k+ notes and almost shed a tear i was so proud of u.. i love you and thank u for being amazing all the time!! and for introducing me to twice and gfriend aka the most amazing girls!!! and of course....#laurjoo5ever <3
@gipsydangger
yo jo (that was lame im sry you deserve better) you havent been in the chat for super long but you’re One Of Us and also 1/2 of the Official Ruby-Got-Me-Into-IZ Squad so lots of love for you!! thank you for singing all star with me in an attempt to cleanse our chat of ******** (im just (all)starring out his name so he doesnt find this post and try to eat my heart again), thank you for being so nice and thoughtful and sweet and all the other amazing things youve been already, thank you for giving iz a shot and somehow becoming a fan in like 5 minutes (???amazing) you!! are a rock star!!! wow!!!!!!
@hjjxxn
ok alex i know you’re not tec h ni c a l ly in the chat but lets be real;;you’re still my Toppklass Queen ;; ur adorable! ur so kind! u work so hard! ur such a sweetheart! forget toppklass queen, u r the queen of my heart 💖 i cant believe we’re both hojoon stans AND yoongi stans it’s like we were meant to be friends or smth idk?? and you got me into winner and sent me the bEST videos of them holy shit im still laughing abt the one where theyre dancing to ‘hello bitches’ jshdkahds and mino’s duck song,,i cri :’( you have the best taste so i’m vv grateful to know you in the first place and! talking to you is super fun even tho we dont do it often <3<3 ilu <3
@itsachocolatecake
jess <3 our leader,,mother,,,resident Cutie Pie <3<3 i am so fond of you?? you’re loads and loads of fun to talk with and the chat would be so different without u, i’m not even gonna imagine it!! instead im gonna remember how you always cheer me up right away and help me remember whats good about myself and tell me that i’m not alone and give me great ideas for metaphors involving brains (like mental brains not physical brains)!!! our mutualness (mutualism? mutuality?? idk) goes waaay back, like, relatively, so thank you for following me in the first place bc it means we’re friends now !! love you <3
@kimsanggyum
kaliiiiiii!! my wonderful fellow scorpio (AHEM i mean what im not a scorpio who said that i’ll fight them) ur super fun and cute and as soon as you joined u fit right in even tho we’re all kind of weird and now you are One Of Us and it’s kind of hard to believe that you havent been since the beginning?? you’re such a cutie and i love love love talking to you and stuff <3 jdkjsldf dog pics are one of the many ways to my heart and your dog is amazing!!! thank you for sharing!!! you are amazing!!! tell canyon monroe i love him (again) and tell him from me to be nice to laura too,,anyway!! love u lots <3
@lapillity
melia. you. are. the. best. my text posts never go noteless bc of you :’) you’re honestly truly just the greatest?? not just bc you like my text posts tho, youre genuinely sweet and suuuuper nice like,,i cant say anything bad about any of the Stream Team tbh but MELIA!!1! you would have to murder a man for a not-justifiable reason for me to say anything bad about you :/ i think you are an Angel and you’re so cute??how are u so cute i dont get it :(( thanks for being my friend and also helping me reject that guy that one time,,without you i definitely would’ve screwed things up tbh so seriously!! thank you and i love you <3<3
@minty-sugar-kpop
minty i think i should tell u now that whenever i type “rip” on my phone the next suggested word is always “minty” :’) we’re always screaming abt kpop groups together like!! when clap was released u screamed about seventeen with me!!! when i told u i was getting into twice u screamed about twice with me!! when nothing else is happening u scream about toppdogg with me (and the rest of us)!!!! i love that youre as excited about your fave groups as i am about my fave groups because it helps remind me that it’s NOT weird to be really super extremely dedicated to things that make u happy and i still struggle with that sometimes so.... thanks for being you i guess?? also for getting rid of ******** from our chat with the power of ot13 :’)) love you <3<3<3
@reallyabananya
kat!! my Superhero!!! the lifegiver for minsung stans everywhere;; i am so grateful for literally everything you’ve ever done in your life but specifically 1) translating every. single. one. of minsung’s often long and very complex posts, 2) being my role model for running an update-esque blog! like!! if kat can do everything she does for her blogs and translate stuff and be so efficient at everything, i can do it for my one tiny little blog!!, 3) working so hard but always being so so sweet to everyone and being so amazingly humble all the time and being somebody i admire not only as a blogger but as a person too <3 (wow that was che e s y lol) im love you!! <3
@saltygot7
hi kendall! another scorpio wowie!!! of course i say “another” bc i already mentioned how kali is a scorpio,,it’s not because i’m a scorpio. because i’m not haha. anyway. im sorry i let ******** come between us, i know you didn’t mean to create a demon that would eventually possess both you and your phone and try to eat all of our hearts. i know and i’m sorry and i love you!!! i also know that you still think those asks u sent were hilarious but i forgive you bc i know you love me too <3<3 i can’t believe my Ultimate Bias and the true visual of our group loves me!! wow!!! thanks for all your amazing selfies, they always make me smile :’) you rlly know how to cheer everyone up and get us in a happy mood and just,,,thanks for always being your lovely self! love u lots <3
@sunshinesanggyun
bella 💕 i love you, i love you, i love you 💕 idk if you know this or not, but you were actually my first tk mutual <3 i remember when i got the notif that you followed me back and i was so excited because this person!! this person with an amazing blog and who i already thought was super cool!! wanted to follow me!!! i still think it’s amazing that you wanted to be my friend but i can’t really say that i “can’t believe it” anymore because i can;;; you’re my friend and i’m your friend and i love you!! i’ll remind you of that every day if i have to. you’re the other 1/2 of the Official Ruby-Got-Me-Into-IZ Squad (along with jovano) and it makes me so happy that you’re a fan now too!!!! you’re just awesone tbh?? you help me with my shitty stuff and i try my best to help you with your shitty stuff and!! you’re one of my best friends!! i’m so so happy and lucky and blessed and thankful to know you! never forget how much i love you forever 💕💕💕
@toppdoggzz
jacqueline;; the awesome aunt that’s super nice and who helps people when they’re sad;;(i can’t remember jess’s exact wording but it was True);;;; you’re so cool and amazing and honestly i find it incredible how you’ve been with bts from the beginning!! is that a weird thing to say as a compliment?? shdfsdhkd sorry but sticking with a group from debut is really admirable, especially because bts didnt start out super big but you stayed with em anyway :’) you’re such a star and you reblog my selfies when i ask you to (btw ur tags on my latest selfies had me cryin;;find someone who will compliment you every day like jacqueline complimented my decent-ish selfies;;) and you’re so great to talk with and yeah!! i love u!!!!
@zombietwink
isaiah. i hope u believe me when i say, from the very bottom of my heart: you are the Meme to my Internet Connection, the Cherry to my Bomb, the Chanyeol to my.....You. idk. you take my worst text posts that i make at like 3am and add the best things to them and make them Good and i love our convos in the replies of my posts alsjdsfjjs also can i just say?? i’m still not 100% sure what the whole thing is with like the “kin” meme (i get what it is but i dont rlly Get It u know) but literally any mention of it ever reminds me of you :’) it’s actually astounding how many memes make me think of you tbh..anyway, ur very very cute and soft and nice and youve been mutuals with me for a Long Time so thanks for thinking im cool enough to follow!!! and for still following me!!! love you <3
wow that took a long time but it was worth it!! tho i honestly wouldn’t blame you if you just skipped everything and only read the little section abt you lmao
well, happy new year! i hope lots of really good, and happy, and lovely, and wonderful things are waiting for you in 2018 ✨✨✨
#it took me abt 4 hours to make this post#thats how much i love all of you <3#also i typed out a million little ''<3''s sldjflkdfsd#i never want to type one again except i do because they sometimes help me say i love you so it's all worth it!#u guys are worth everything!!!#✨💖💞✨💛💓✨❤️💗✨💓✨❣️💓✨💕💗💛✨❤️💖✨✨#ruby says things#mutuals <3#<3#DISCLAIMER: there were abt 2 people i didnt include bc i dont know their urls and we're not mutuals and we never talk so..........
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here u go
1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you?
uh i tend to either doubt the existence of everyone including myself, or doubt my own existence but not everyone else’s
2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you?
like 1 or 2 i live for the night bicth
3. The person you would never want to meet?
this is hard because even people i truly hate i would want to meet so i can fight them. so maybe jrr tolkien bc my expectations are probably too high and meeting him would be like “oh right ur a just a real and regular person that existed righto”
4. What is your favorite word?
probably “fuck” lets be real it’s just so flexible
5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be?
i have been asking myself this question my entire life and i cannot yet answer with certainty but i rlly relate to swamp maples
6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought?
“damn im good at cutting my hair” (i chopped my bangs last night)
7. What shirt are you wearing?
a feminist tee shirt my cousin’s girlfriend made
8. What do you label yourself as?
a goth bitch. a gay motherfucker. a sleepy boi.
9. Bright room or dark room?
uhh i like a lot of natural light, i don’t have blinds on my windows so it can get bright but the best is early morning or evening when its pretty dark out and i have my string lights turned on. so i guess low-to-neutral lighting.
10. What were you doing at midnight last night?
sleeping lol.
11. Favorite age you’ve been so far?
18 was reeeaal good but i’m gonna be 21 next and i am looking forward to that i think it will be a fun time
12. Who told you they loved you last?
my dad or my stepmom like yesterday probably
13. Your worst enemy?
not to be an edgelord but. my own brain probably.
14. What is your current desktop picture?
usually a pretty nature picture bc im a basic bitch, rn its this
15. Do you like someone?
um i like taylor swift
16. The last song you listened to?
the 10 hour version of “weightless” by marconi union (its my background music for nanowrimo)
17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?
hahah um idk if i can say this without the fbi showing up
18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?
no one in particular in this exact moment but. if a nazi shows up.
19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do?
im uh not comfortable with this concept
20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional)
idk maybe my eyes i like my face a lot but i also like my arms a lot but also my hairy legs? beautiful.
21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do?
first of all it would be pretty lit bc i’m genderfluid and i’d have a great time looking physically masc. so ideally i’d have long hair and a beard and i would just go for a hike and write and be beautiful.
22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it?
i dont have anything thats a secret to everyone but like most people dont know that i used to snowboard all the time and was real fuckin good at it
23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of?
that theres a monster in the toilet thats going to reach up and grab me while im peeing
24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal.
alfalfa sprouts, sharp cheddar cheese, hummus, cucumbers, spicy mustard, turkey, and figs on rye bread
25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it?
tattoo definitely
26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go?
ICELAND
27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be?
i literally have no idea what i like so. i would pass the offer on to my dad he is much wiser in the lore of alcoholic beverages than i am.
28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?
no TERFs.
29. What is your favorite expletive?
mother of fuck.
30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno?
uh my journals
31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?
jesus christ. um. no im not getting into this shit here tbh i didnt read all these questions before reblogging this thing sorry.
32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world!
iceland here i come.
33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?
of course Death is a cool entity you dont have to tell me that. anyway i have not yet lost someone in my family to death that i was super close to so. i’d bring back carrie fisher.
34. What was your last dream about?
i was in a deep crater trying to climb out to look beyond the rocks... i knew the ocean was supposed to be there and i was supposed to be able to see japan from there if i could climb up?? but when i got to the top and looked out, the ocean was gone and a barren landscape lay before me, images sliding into place like a powerpoint presentation superimposed on the sky of the apocalypse that had struck during my exile, the art and culture that was lost, the demise of the world. i climbed back down to chill in the bottom of my crater.
35. Are you a good….[insert anything you’d like here]?
yes i am a good.
36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital?
yeah only three times i think but all within the same year.
37. Have you ever built a snowman?
hell yeah
38. What is the color of your socks?
not wearing any right now but the last pair i was wearing are orange, brown, and tan
39. What type of music do you like?
uhh lots of kinds but my top 3 are taylor swift, my chemical romance, and hayley kiyoko
40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets?
sunrises but if i lived on the west coast and could watch the sunset on the water i might prefer that
41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor?
chocolate
42. What football team do you support? (I will answer in terms of American football as well as soccer)
i dont care about sports teams buddy
43. Do you have any scars?
yeah i have a bunch from just playing and doing weird shit in the woods and a lot from picking at bug bites for too long, but i also have a couple self-harm scars from a while back
44. What do you want to be when you graduate?
idk exactly but im going back to school soon for environmental science and i’d love to do anything that lets me be outside and work with plants or animals
45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
i’d either be born DMAB or have a brain that isn’t so goddamn forgetful
46. Are you reliable?
u mm idk i try to be but i am not for everyone
47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be?
what do u regret not doing
48. Do you hold grudges?
i do but very selectively, only for like one or two people
49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create?
um idk maybe i could combine goats and turkey vultures into some kind of goat/dragon/bird of prey. think of the mayhem.
50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had?
i genuinely cannot remember sorry. but it was probably in an online forum in 2007 during the height of random humor.
51. Are you a good liar?
uhhh doubtful but i used to think i was good lol
52. How long could you go without talking?
i’ve gone a couple days without talking before and im sure i could go much longer, maybe months or years even altho it would not be healthy for me.
53. What has been you worst haircut/style?
junior year when i thought i knew how to cut my own hair (but i really didn’t) and i wanted to look like a knockoff brand Skins character (and i really did). that wasn’t rlly good but it was fun and i dont regret it.
54. Have you ever baked your own cake?
nah im not really a cake person
55. Can you do any accents other than your own?
i can sometimes do a british accent which i’ve been told is convincing to american ears but is probably very overdone. i can’t speak other accents but my brain gets stuck thinking in scottish or like a cowboy accent from old westerns a lot of the time.
56. What do you like on your toast?
lots of stuff depending on my mood but my fav is a runny egg where the bread can soak up all the yolk.
57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of?
eleven from stranger things
58. What would be you dream car?
i rlly rlly miss my old car that had to be junked almost a year ago. i don’t remember what kind it actually was but it was from the 80s and was a faded baby blue and small and boxy and the seats still smelled like cigars. any car from that time period but with a modern stereo + aux cord is the dream. or a big lesbian pickup truck like what bella has in twilight but with decent gas mileage. the dream.
59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain.
yes but only if im home alone. what i do most in the shower is have imaginary conversations or pretend that i’ve been trekking through middle earth for four months without bathing and this is the first opportunity i’ve had to clean myself and i enjoy the shit out of it. or i pretend i’m a dragon.
60. Do you believe in aliens?
yeah dude definitely
61. Do you often read your horoscope?
no ive done that like maybe twice ever
62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet?
R its just so good
63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons?
dragons but i fuckgin love dinosaurs dude
64. What do you think about babies?
i’m a little awkward/insecure around them but i feel deeply protective when i hold one and in general i think theyre pretty awesome
65. Freebie! Ask anything interesting you can think of.
hah motherfucker u forgot to ask me one
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