#im really worried. everything is bad right now
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Hi! I'm a big fan of your blog! I just this past week got into the gallaghers after stumbling across them on ao3. Every time I think i've found everything, a new surprising factoid comes out of the woodwork. They are so in love its inane and frankly quite worrying. I cannot believe more people dont see it with how obvious they're being.
That being said, I've noticed a thing about one of Liam's tweets and a song lyric he wrote. I cant find the tweet at the moment, but it's the one where someone asks if he loves Noel and Liam responds "yes I love him is that such a crime". I was listening to GGTIA and realized the lyrics "I'd get round to loving you, is that such a crime?" sounded awful familiar...He must have taken that response right from the song lol. Which makes me feel some sort of way. Especially with how awful (glorious) GGTIA is. The whole song is clearly a love song and yet Liam wrote it for Noel. And now Liam references his own song to say yes, he does love Noel.
God, I love them.
omg ahhhh congrats, welcome!! the first "wait.. hold on. wait wtf?? this can't be true.. oh jesus it's getting worse🤯" stage of getting into Them is a powerful powerful drug and tbh it never loses strength. we've been on this grind full-time for a year now (really no time at all in the grand scheme) and every day we're still going "holy shit WAIT WHAT??" about some new insane thing. (also how did you inadvertently stumble upon them on ao3?? what a trip.)
re liam's uhhh Everything. i regret(?) to inform you that ggtia is barely scratching the surface lol. the "crime" stuff in particular goes way deeper than that, ggtia is just one of many references back to a central core of sus shit. noel is a much worse offender in this arena actually. beyond his multiple ""jokes"" in the press about being attracted to/having sex with liam and the legality thereof, his most egregious act was writing this song, a demo nominally called "it's a crime" by fans bc he never actually released or named it, someone just leaked it in 2000. he later rewrote it and it became "let there be love," a trajectory we can all speculate on till the cows come home. he has since denied remembering this song even exists. (if you haven't clocked this yet, he's a pathological recreational liar and also has crazy bad memory issues, so even odds on whether this is true or not.)
also idk if you've dipped into any of liam's solo music or not, but ggtia was Baby's First Steps in terms of writing lovesick songs about one's brother. i can't necessarily recommend liam's music on any basis other than it being kinda catchy and p much all of it being incest anthems, so ymmv on enjoyment factor, but here's a brief playlist of SOME OF his more astonishing entries in the "im madly in love with my brother who hates me" oeuvre. (and then go watch the music video for "one of us," which might be the most excruciatingly raw thing anyone's ever done for an audience of millions, and is crammed beyond capacity with References.) there are a few of noel's songs on this playlist too, the ones i personally think are about liam, but diagnosing noel's music is a completely different exercise than diagnosing liam's. noel's very circumspect and art-first about his music, whereas it's pretty safe to assume most of liam's songs are explicitly about noel. the only one on this playlist with some potential wiggle room is "for what it's worth," which liam once claimed wasn't about noel, however his alternative very vague explanation was that it was possibly about his ex wife. which under the circumstances didn't really make sense. imo he just got a little embarrassed and backpedalled under scrutiny. here is noel acknowledging his awareness that all liam's songs are about him lol.
anyway! liam's a magical boy who believed in himself and never gave up and relentlessly wooed his big brother with mid music for years until that shit finally worked, so let this be a lesson to us all. NEVER have dignity, NEVER say die, ALWAYS kiss your brother on the mouth in public. the universe loves you 💖💖💖
#communiques#blogger two editing the tags to just add a disclaimer that she actually likes liam's music and that blogger one's opinions are her own lol
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aurgh
#my dads in the hospital.#im really worried. everything is bad right now#my moms like $200 in the hole#and hes about to be homeless#and i feel so helpless. i did so much today and yet i feel useless#i feel so trapped#every time things start to feel ok and i get into a rhythm something goes wrong again#im so sick of this
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the bittersweet but absolute flood of relief that comes from admitting defeat at living independently, to have to move back in with parents. we tried! we gave it our best shot for almost 3 years! but living like this (being on our own) is just not possible for us at this time of our lives. we've finally proved it to ourselves that we can't do it. it'll be okay to let ourselves rest now
#latimers parents not mine!!!! i am NOT moving back to florida LOL#really hope that the changes will be good for my mental health. this apartment is toxic to us#ive been on the verge of meltdowns Kind Of A Lot lately. imnot doing great#extremely dependent on substances. just to reach a baseline level of functioning. but even that isnt working as much anymore#the only things i do on my phone or tablet these days is like. 2 mobile games. and skirting past my dms to check latimers blog#its too overwhelming to even open discord these days yknow. everything on earth is too much for me right meow#i havent been drawing i havent been social online OR irl i havent been cooking or creating#i havent been keeping up with personal hygiene like at all im particularly ashamed about that one#i've been really bad about doing my T the past few months which is a HUGE shame because im SO fucking hyped to be on it#theres just. too many obstacles in getting it done half the time. and the other half of the time i just forget#anyway. anyway.#our lease ends in july so between now and then we're just gonna try our best to tolerate our living situation enough to get by#there's a light at the end of the tunnel. and its called 'i only have to be in charge of like 2 rooms at most. and not a household!'#we're gonna try to slowly comb through all our things between now and then so the process of moving wont suck as bad#cuz listen. its pretty fucking bad right now#maybe not for other people. but it is for me. and its okay to let myself come to terms with that#im just. so relieved. still very stressed! but theres at least light at the end of the tunnel and its only like 2 months away#ill be able to draw guilt-free again. ill be able to just EXIST guilt-free#i dont think ive felt guilt-free for just existing the way i do since like. turning 20#i know my mom wouldve loved if i stayed home forever. and im sad i cant be there for her#but ever since i had a fight with my dad at 15 or 16 it just really felt like he didnt want me there more and more#maybe as the youngest he was resenting that i was preventing him from becoming an empty nester or something. i dont know#because all the other kids had been moved out and on their own at least once but i had never left home before#i dont know if he'd be heartbroken or not to hear that i feeling like he was resenting me. but thats the energy i was picking up for years#i dunno. i dont know#anyway. back to housing. for now im going to try to relax and store energy for the moving process#the huge pile of things by the kitchen? i dont have to worry about that becoming permanent because we're leaving in 2 months#the general discord of the state of our possessions? we have to go through everything to pack it all anyway. we can move in RIGHT this time#when we moved in here we didnt have a car or license so we were dependent on latimers 3-hr-drive-away parents to help us move#just /across town/. and we had a whole month between leases! but it still had to be done in a weekend
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Fine, don't text me for over a week, don't return my calls, don't return my emails. Do whatever you want. I don't care.
#he often does this when things are very bad#so i'm worried absolutely sick what's going on#he's never really done this to me though#i know he's alive because his brother's gf sent me a picture of them together. so i can know that at least#but underneath all the worry i am Lonely! so deeply lonely!#i deserve love i deserve at least a good night#he used to give this to me why isn't he now?#and like. we're meant to be arranging trav together and I have No idea what his plans are#so i'll have to dump everything at my parents at the last minute#the situation with his family is fucking awful so i dont feel i have a right to be mad but like. im not happy about this
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re: the situation here, the supreme court is gonna be announcing their decision tomorrow on whether to declare the mining contract illegal/unconstitutional (actually its a bit more complicated bc they'll be repealing a specific law, but to keep it understandable lmao) which would then give justification for it to be voided. first quantum minerals will likely try to sue our government if that happens, but that'll be the next problem to deal with and people would rather know our representatives actually convey the population's will at the very least lmfao. but if the court doesn't give the decision people want to hear then shit will definitely kick off for at least a few days.
also the canadian embassy have refused to get involved at all or even give a statement, and won't respond to anyone, but it doesn't surprise me whose side the canadian government is on 🤡
this was the crowd outside the supreme court this afternoon though
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#🐊#god i really am hoping for the best but the corruption is just so so so bad here#even within the supreme court too#im also a bit worried abt potential riots etc. if it's bad news bc the police will start escalating shit immediately#but im also gonna be so angry its gnna take some willpower not to be outside smashing car windows and shit myself jsdfjgsdgfsdgj#this whole situation has felt so frustrating bc its like the panamanian population right now are the only thing standing in the way of such#mass scale destruction of the rainforest (not to mention the exploitation colonialism and everything else) and so many people have been#trying so hard in struggles against both this company and our government#but we're such a small country and its like nobody cares about us
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River monsters mentioned for the river monsters mutuals
#From a head full of ghosts by paul tremblay#About a quarter of the way in and i like the writing so far and i like seeing a book that is trying to tackle how harmful exorcisms are#Especially when the actual issue is mental health as the narrators sister has schizophrenia and on top of all that theyre being covered by#A reality tv show which is why you keep seeing other shows like that mentioned#The only thing im wrestling with is the portrayal of schizophrenia considering neither i or the author have to deal with it and im not sure#As of right now if its really going to challenge the portrayal of schizophrenia in horror beyond hey its gonna get even more fucked up for#Someone if you bring religion into it#Like again the narrator is this girls sister not the actual person going through everything and of course its really scary for everyone it#Not a bad thing to have a narrator who is a scared child worried about her sister and not really understanding whats going on the problem i#How much of that perspective is used to make the other sister seem like this scary monster in their lives#Like i said im only a quarter of the way in im not sure how i feel now and how ill feel later but i really hope it does end up saying#Something new and interesting about the way we treat mental illness in horror especially because the premise is so SO good for that
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Vent in the tags, just keep scrolling~
#since becoming homeless (again...)a little over 3 months ago#my husband and i along with my four dogs (3 wolfdog/husky mixes and a AmStaff mutt) AND our 3 cats#have been living on the floor of an amazing friends garage since February#waiting for my husbands inheritance to be processed by the bank so we can actually go back to a normal human existence#but until then everything is a major fucking struggle to even eat every day :^)#and ive been in a bad spot mentally for a while now#the bestie is going through some MAJOR life stuff right now and has a lot more to worry about than our dumb ocs and snzblr#i just wish i had some actual friends in the community instead of the half of snzblr that has me blocked lol#its really dumb and desperate for me to want people to be nice to me and maybe even form some kind of friendship when im clearly shown that#my presence in one of the only places i used to feel scene is honestly unwanted#i wish i didnt care so much but damn man im tired of always being alone and having conversations with myself#but oh well i guess this is what i get#geezievent#well this is embarrassing lmao
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finally playing the sword & shield dlc (yes i’m a little late to the party lmao) and woooow crown tundra is so much more enjoyable than isle of armour
#maybe it’s just because i’m stuck in the stage of leveling kubfoo and the only other thing to do in the meantime is the diglett quest#hey you know what would be fun for the players? spotting a dozen sight variations on the ground in a sandstorm!!!#also the dynamax lair thing in crown tundra?????? VERY FUN and basically just free legendaries#they just tell you where to find giratina and you do 4 fights and don’t have to worry about catch rates??#tbf i did lose again kyurem but then you can just retry at any time and it doesn’t cost you ANYTHING#i also really like the fact that they give you pokemon to choose. takes a lot of the stress out of it for me#ANYWAY so it’s rough having to choose legendary forms#i wanna go with the darker type for everything all the time lmao#like i’m gonna get the ghost horsie. but i’m still trying to decide for urshifu#i think i might actually go with water. but dark is cool 😭😭😭#tbf i can just use a different switch profile to get the other one and then transfer it but it’s not the same yknow. only one is my choice#anyway idk. i’m having fun. i played for like 8 hrs straight yesterday OOPS#trying to work out the regi puzzles tho….regirock was very obviously an everstone but i’ll have to think abt the others#(NO SPOILERS IM DOING IT MYSELF)#and then i have to choose electric vs dragon right? fml#i’ll probably go electric because my strongest pokemon are more dragons#but i know regieleki is the competitive choice and more ppl take it so i feel bad for regidrago lmaooooo#whatever that’s a choice for later. the only choice i have to make right now is where to plant my carrots and im going with ghost for that#IM GOING GHOST GUYS#personal
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Flying to San Francisco today!
#wanted to say a few things that I’ve been thinking since this morning#the first one is silly and it’s that bad bunny story with kendal and gucci is hilarious really#especially since everyone was wishing gucci to die amd im like wait til Sabato gets on track again#so they took the most streammed and probably famous artist right now lol#and one of the kardashians 💀💀💀💀💀 marketing is so fucking nuts at times#secondly… im so worried about shawn#things haven’t been quite right since that fucking rainbow flag on his ig story#the tour cancelled no music the mental health stuff everyone shitting on him… idk i want to protect him#but im so proud of him for taking the courage it takes to make such risky decisions everytime#not everyone is open to accept everything and be the yes man#it depends what values you believe in i guess
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Simon gets a message from reader while he’s on base. It’s a video. The thumbnail looks like a blurred image of a store isle
Once he has a moment to himself, he’s able to sit back and finally check out what you had sent.
The camera pans down to show yours and simon’s two year old daughter. She has half a mini chocolate muffin clutched in her little baby fist and chocolate smudges on her nose and bright pink cheeks. She’s standing, staring at something out of frame.
The camera is a bit shaky and Simon can hear you trying desperately to hide your laughter.
“Baby,” you say, “baby, look at me.” You bend down to bring the camera closer to your daughter, who only turns to look at you for a second before going back to staring at the same spot out of frame.
“Who is that?”
Your daughter raised one of her chocolate covered hands to point towards whatever it was that had been captivating her the entire video. “Daddy.”
Simon here’s more of your pained stifled laughter and the camera follows your daughter’s gaze, revealing a cheaply made Halloween grim reaper statue, with dusty purple robes, a plastic scythe, and a hilariously misshapen skull face.
He reads the accompanying texts that had followed the video.
[She just started saying “daddy daddy” over and over and it took me forever to figure out what she was talking about]
[for a second I thought, “oh is he here?”]
[Im so dense lol]
[she really misses you ]
[I miss you too]
The next text was a picture of your daughter fast asleep in her car seat. Now cleaned of chocolate, she had replaced her muffin with a giant plastic rat that she hugged to her chest like a teddy bear.
[she refused to leave without it]
Simon smiles. It had been a long time since he had a family. People who loved waiting for him to come home.
Your texts had been sent hours ago, and he felt bad about not responding all day.
[that’s unfair. My mask is made of much better materials]
[I miss you both too. If everything goes right I should be home by Monday]
[and don’t call yourself dense]
Simon thinks for a moment, something eating at him about that video
[I wish she didn’t know about the mask. I don’t want her to see me that way]
You respond quickly, making Simon feel worse about his delayed reply
[Dont worry about that honey. She’s only two, and I think she only saw you wear in mask once once or twice. She’ll forget in a month.]
[She doesn’t see you as anything other than her daddy]
[her daddy and her jungle gym]
[lol yes that too]
[Im sorry I don’t have a lot of time. I’ll try and call you tomorrow]
[ok Im heading to bed now anyway]
[goodnight I love you ❤️]
[goodnight I love you too ❤️]
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SUDDENLY STARTED RAINING SO HARD WE ARE SO FUCKING BACK
#i was like huh whats that noise. bc i can normally NEVER hear anything over my headphones but it was the rain fucking shattering it down#my bed is WET the window was only open a few inches 😭#anyway had no signal at work again today smfh. but at least they let me on the bus free on the way there this morning#still a bit wobbly im in the baby deer phase of post major depressive episode#roommate asked how i was doing when she got home and i very very nearly started crying but i didnt i was so brave#my insane insecurity and anger swings post rsd episode have mostly faded too thank fuck. only took 4 days which is pretty good for me#but im still so so tired it takes everything out of me...#when im recovered + can talk abt it without making myself upset again im promising myself i will talk to her abt the rsd if nothing else#but i really really dont want to make her feel bad abt it at all its genuinely not anyones fault. but its important to me that i say smth#just so we can avoid it happening again where possible bc it does really suck so bad. for everyone im sure but mostly me here#and i would like to be able to care abt ppl and have close friends without risking my entire mental (+ physical..) wellbeing 😭#i think if im still struggling w mood once my meds stabilise i might ask if there are options to help w that too#like i think ive gone as far as i can w therapeutic techniques rn. its just too overwhelmingly intense and reflexive for me to apply that#and i dont feel like i live my life around it or in fear of it anymore like generally i have been a lot better#but when im vulnerable and it DOES strike i have no defense against it whatsoever and it can tank everything for weeks#its just high stakes. and it'll help to make sure ppl know abt it and might be able to support etc but it would be nice to never worry abt#so worth trying meds for it maybe. i just dont rly wanna have the conversations w medical ppl in order to get it in the first place#like i wouldnt feel safe telling a doctor abt it bc the idea of someone with that authority having power over me is terrifying#ah well this isnt a problem for right now. plus stimulants might help me w it anyway once im finished titrating so we'll see#got so distracted typing this i forgot what i was gonna do.... i need to check my planner#and then ill probably read and go to sleep early i think zzzzz#ahhh.. and the birds are singing outside now the rain has stopped :-)#.diaries
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Anyways im just very peeved that my problems with honor mode so far haven't been the fights because I'm very good with cheesing them. It's been with the consequences of failing certain story events.
Like I haven't touched my game with Poetry, my adorable little pink tiefling bardlock, because despite almost being done with act 2, I foolishly decided to talk to Isobel because I thought I could handle the fight. I didn't need to talk to her! I didn't need Selune's blessing! I had the pixie's bell! Yet, for some reason, I decided to tempt fate anyway with an encounter that took me at least 8 tries to get right on my first playthrough. Now I'm too bummed to play the world's cutest bard because I ended up condemning tons of wonderful characters to their death with my hubris. It doesn't matter that I was technically already continuing the run with dishonor (the phase spider matriarch), no reloading allowed ever I suppose.
So I'm gonna probably make an even more wholesome run with a halfling, and I will simply not take any risks that happen to take out an entire village if you fail.
#simon says#I do need to figure out the act 2 final fight as well as act 3#the first Kethrick fight shouldn't be too bad with Aylin on my side and no drider#but the second fight? im a little worried#i did find out that darkness works REALLY well on the giant skeleton bit though#helps with the accuracy if he's blinded and you're not#and if you have summons in the darkness that dont rely on sight#but act 3 is gonna be a pickle because i have yet to beat the game ever#like I cannot properly think about or plan battles because I simply do not know#like I found ways around a lot of difficult fights#but in act 3 I've basically only did everything outside the lower city#and only Lorroakan's fight (which was tough)#I have technically made it to Cazador's fight but every time I fight him I get beat so I would just reload and put that off for later#i really do want to do a monk playthrough though since the cursed amulet might have fun monk stuff#i might consider a halfling monk tbh but im always unsure when it comes to class#i hate the monk clothes on the body type though so i might just make it look like camp clothes#anyways yall probably dont care about this but I wanna talk about it#it's the only thing i got going on right now besides stress and depression damnit
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Just Once - Say Yes
werewolf!Chan x fem!reader
warnings! MDNI 18+, biting, very slight blood mentions, PIV, no protection, rut, knotting, fingering, nipple play, reader says it hurts once, breeding mentions, monsterfucking? (I could have done more)
notes! you know im down bad when I get wet from just seeing images of chan like what the fuck?
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Chan knows he’s not supposed to be here, yet, that’s exactly where he is. It’s almost as if he’s not in control of his body and in a way he’s not. Your scent fills his nose even through the shut door of your bedroom. You’re sleeping, he figures. He can hear your steady, slow breaths and the gentle snores.
His feet are planted, head resting on the wooden door as he groans. Chan wants so desperately to wake you up. To softly knock on your door until you answer in the dead of the night. Maybe seeing you will satiate his thirst. Just a glance at your figure can help him - it will be enough, but he’s not thinking rationally right now. He can’t. Not when his rut is at an all-time high. Chan is on top of his suppressors, but his breeding period and the full moon makes for an unbearable combo.
He knows you will answer no matter how late it is. Chan can easily imagine you opening the door, dazed and confused. He would tell you he’s having a hard time by himself, tell you that he desperately needs your help.
Or maybe he wouldn’t say anything at all. He could just grab your plush hips and pull you into a kiss. Maybe you’d mumble sleepy questions, squeak when his hands find the fat of your ass, but you’d let him. He knows you would.
That’s why he has to leave. Now. His cock throbs just thinking about how pliant you are for him. He tells himself that he’ll be satisfied with his hand or his fleshight which makes a shitty substitute. Chan knows breeding a human during such an intense time would be too much, too rough for them. As much as his body and wolf beg for you, that sliver of humanity is intact.
So he whines, quiet and high. Chan wills his legs to move, stepping back until he’s no longer pressed against your door. The floorboards creak under his feet with every step. He swears they’re telling him to go back, to bang on your door and pump you until he’s sure you’re knocked up. He really has lost it, convinced that the wood beneath is telling him to screw you.
Unbelievable.
He’s too busy laughing and fighting with himself to hear you slip out of bed. Chan misses your quiet feet treading to your bedroom door, slowly opening it as you adjust your eyes in the dark.
“Channie?”
The floorboards must be cursed to sound like you or maybe his rut is just that bad. He tried to brush off your call as him going insane, but the hair on his neck stands and the smell of you is so much stronger. Chan doesn’t want to turn around for your sake. His composure will break and he doesn’t want to imagine what you look like right now.
“What are you doing out here?” You sound so tired barely coming out of your slumber. Chan doesn’t sense any fear from you, not even worry. You’re far too sleepy to feel anything beyond confusion. The trust you have for your lover, even if he is half beast, is endearing. It makes his heart swell and his stomach turn. He can’t tell if your love for him is naive or pure. Perhaps both.
He’s going to tell you that he’s okay. He just had a bad dream and needed to walk around the house for a bit. It’s not uncommon to see your boyfriend wandering the house late at night; you know how difficult it is for him to sleep. Chan was going to tell you, but he felt your hand wrap around his bicep. You gently tug him until he faces you and what a mistake that is. You’re dressed in a shirt much too big for you, his shirt. It barely goes past your ass and your pebbled nipples poke through the fabric. Your eyes are squinted, lips swollen from sleep. Chan’s eyes are captivated by your human beauty when you say, “Channie, is everything okay?”
No, everything is not okay. Chan’s been fucking into his hand for hours pretending it’s you - he’s knotted into his toy countless times. When he did get the stupid courage to go to your door, he backed away. It’s even worse now his cock is leaking being so close to you.
You should have stayed sleeping.
His strong arms wrap around your torso, pulling you in. There’s no time to question him when Chan presses his lips against yours. Your lover is usually gentle during kisses. He takes time to cup your cheek, to tilt his head so your mouths can better align. If he was really into it, he would suck on your bottom lip only to bite it until you gasped.
He doesn’t kiss you like that now, not even in the slightest. His hands cup your ass just as he imagined. They knead and dig into your flesh, pressing you flush against his crotch. His lips are rough and messy. Your teeth clash almost animalistically and he hears you whine into the kiss. Chan can’t tell if you're whining due to the neediness from his mouth or cock. He knows you can feel his stiffness against your leg.
Your dainty hands find his chest to gently push at it. Chan’s usually good at reading the room, knowing what to do and when to do it. But this isn’t your Channie. He can’t even feel your fists when he keeps shoving his tongue down your throat. The taste of you is addicting. All he wants to do is feel you from the inside out. To have every part of him connected with you in the most primal way.
It’s not until you whimper again that he notices. Chan sucks harshly on your tongue before he pulls away with a string of saliva connecting your mouths. His eyes are dazed when he looks at your features. Your face is flushed and your eyes are wide. If you were still asleep before, you’re wide awake now. Chan can tell you’re trying to come up with what to say, but you already know. You can feel his boner on your thigh, you can see the glow in his eyes, and the fact that his body seems thicker, denser. Chan has only let you see him during the end of his rut. He’ll lock himself in his room for days until he’s ready to socialize. You could always hear him on the other side though. How the slick sounds of whatever he’s using are surely filled with cum. If you pressed your ear against the frame, you could hear him softly calling out your name. You wanted to see him so bad. No matter how many times you asked, Chan would turn you down. It’s too dangerous, he’d said. I don't want to hurt you.
But that Chan is nowhere to be found. Instead, you’re faced with the very wolf he’s tried so desperately to keep you from.
“Sorry,” he already knows what trouble you’ll be in tonight. “Hurts so bad. I can’t take it.” Chan grinds his cock to show you. “Just one knot. Just one I promise.” Ah, a promise. You both know how much Chan loves keeping his promises, but this is one he doesn’t know you’re hoping he’ll break.
He doesn’t even know why he’s asking. He doesn’t think stopping is possible at this point, but he’d try. Chan is already trying to ignore how his lips ache for yours and stop thinking about how perfectly your body molds into his, but you hold on to him tighter.
Chan doesn’t hear you say yes with how loud his blood drums in his ears, but he does see you nod. The sultry look in your eyes will do you more harm than good. He doesn't ask twice, doesn’t think twice. He smashes his lips against yours again, walking you back to your room without caring how you trip over your own feet.
You feel the bed on the back of your knees and Chan rips himself from the kiss. He pushes you on the mattress, quickly crawling over you as one of his hands lifts the shirt to your shoulder. You gasp at how quickly he’s moving. His hot mouth is already latched onto your nipple while his hand dips past your underwear.
By some magic, you’re already wet. Chan only plays with your clit for seconds before dripping his thick fingers into your heat. Squeals and wet pumps fill the room. Your back arches when he bites on your nipple, tugging the bud and letting go before doing it all over again. Bruises are already forming on your breast and Chan is eager to make your other match. His slick fingers pull from your pussy to tug your underwear down instead.
Your panties hang from one ankle, legs wide as Chan settles between them. The entrance of your cunt slightly gapes from his fingers. No time is wasted as he shrugs his boxers off, eyes never leaving your core. You almost want to close your legs from his staring, but you would miss the view of his cock springing free.
“Oh shit,” you gawk at his size. Chan’s always been thick, a fat head that always stretches you out just right. But this - this is massive. His rut must make everything bigger. Even the knot that sits at the base of his cock seems triple in size. “Channie, I don’t think- there’s no way in hell you can fit.”
But he’s already stroking himself. Your worries fall on deaf ears when his fat tip touches your clit. He moans at the feeling of your lips around him. He presses his cock so that it grinds against your flesh hard. Your mouth falls open, gaze dropping so you can see him rock against your pussy.
You think you could cum just like this. His engorged cock provides the perfect veins and ridges for stimulation. Still, your cunt clenches pathetically around nothing. Curiosity is a dangerous thing. It makes you think about what it would feel like to have his raw cock in you. Chan can tell you’re ready for it when you start grinding back, tilting your hips so his tip catches your entrance.
It’s going to fit - he’ll make sure. Even if you cry and beg for him to slow down, he knows your body will break for him.
And it does just that with the first intrusion. The swell of his cock easily slides into you with a few inches following before he meets the inevitable resistance of your tight cunt. You whine, hands finding purchase on the pillow beneath you. It doesn't hurt, not in the slightest, but you can feel the pressure. Your walls clench and squeeze his girth until he forces himself to pull an inch out.
“Baby, shit,” he breathes. Chan attempts to gain composure through controlled inhales and exhales. “Why are you always so tight?”
Before you can even think about answering his rhetorical question, he thrusts himself deeper. Chan follows his breath, using his airflow as a metronome. In, out, in, out. Deeper, inch by inch, before he sees his knot come to contact with your cunt.
He’s trying, really trying not to just pin your hands down by your sides and fuck his hips into you. Instead, he keeps his hands at your thighs, but he’s not sure if that’s any better. Chan’s claws dig into your tender flesh leaving marks that nearly split your skin. It must hurt with how hard he’s gripping you but your eyes roll to the back of your head with every thrust.
Just like he thought, you’re so good to him. Even with your pretty whines and whimpers, you’re still such a good girl for your Channie.
Such a good girl.
It gets to him: your flushed cheeks, your bouncing tits, the moans that tumble from your swollen lips, and how your hands have moved from the pillow to try and grasp onto him instead. You must want more, he reasons. You must with the cream he sees coating his length every time he pulls out. You must with how you’re chanting his name, nearly sobbing it.
You must with how you make his knot ache, begging to already shove its way inside you and spill.
Chan can imagine it, he can taste it. It’s such a strong need that he growls, his sharp canines showing from his lips pulled back into an animalistic snarl. Saliva drips down his teeth when he thinks about biting you. Leaving marks on your neck that will only help hold you down while his knot finds its place in your womb. You hardly notice the droll seeping your tummy, too caught up with how harshly Chan is fucking into you.
You do, however, feel how his hips change pace. They get harder, sloppier as if he’s trying to shove that god-forsaken knot into you.
“Channie!” It’s half-panicked and half-breathless. “Wait! That’s not - hng! I can’t-”
“You can,” he snarls. “And I will.”
Now you can see his teeth that clamp down so hard that his drool is tinted with pink. This is the first time you’ve seen him for what he truly is - a beast. A monster in its purest form with eyes that seem to glow, pitch-black nails that will surely leave marks for weeks, and canines you know can shred you in a second.
Even with all of that, you know that this man - this wolf - is Channie. Your Channie.
So you don’t whine against him anymore. You don’t try to escape him when he lays his head in between your shoulder and neck to sink his teeth into. You embrace the bite, fully expecting unbearable pain, but instead, it’s blinded by the stretch of his knot in you.
Pleasure and pain intertwine, unable to separate from each other when Chan completely surrounds you. But your body reacts before your brain can. You let out a yelp and scratch your dull nails down his sculpted back. Chan moans into your neck at the feeling, shoving his hips impossibly deeper just to feel you do it again.
“Sh-shit! Channie! Hurts…” but he doesn’t see your eyes roll to the back of your head at the feeling of his seed pumping into you.
Chan doesn’t reply, can’t reply with how he’s pulled his teeth from you and begun licking your wounds. But he knows. His balls tense and release with every spurt of cum he gives you and you whimper with every pump.
He’ll apologize in the morning; pamper you and make sure that you’re well rested. He’ll make sure to take care of you real good, especially with the chance of you giving him pups.
Fuck. He can’t think like that. His cock jumps at the thought and he swears his knot swells all over again. Chan inhales your human scent, reminding him that you’re his priority no matter how much his rut makes him needy to breed. But even in his frenzy state, he doesn’t dare to tell you knotting can last up to 30 minutes.
#smut#skz smut#stray kids smut#stray kids#skz#skz hard hours#skz hard thoughts#skz bangchan#skz bang chan#christopher bang#bangchan fic#chris skz#bangchan smut#bang chan smut#bangchan#bangchan fanfic#skz chris#skz chris smut
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#so ive spent the past several days moving from my apartment to a new townhouse and tbh literally everything is as bad as i was worried about#like first of all its kind of in the middle of nowhere#like the neighborhood is in the middle of an industrial park with nothing around but offices#which is great for my roommate who now has a 5 minute commute. but not great for me who has to commute 30 minutes on the highway#its also a lot smaller#like the house itself is bigger and all of the spaces that are my roommates are bigger#but my bedroom and bathroom are a lot smaller and theres no storage#so ive had to go through everything i moved here just to see how much i can get rid of just so i can have space to live#like i asked my roommate if i could store some of my yarn and fabric stash in the office#and she technically said yes but i know she really meant shed rather i not#so ive spent the past several days panicking because i dont know what to do about any of it#the worst part is that the day we move out i leave for a cruise which should be fun but instead its just another thing to be stressed about#i hate this place already and i wish i had a choice to go somewhere else#i wish id at least been able to see it before coming in to get the keys#cause the pics online were really shitty and i had to dig to even find a shitty walkthrough video#it doesnt help that theres been a bunch of drama with my guild that might mean i end up leaving and quitting the game#im just so tired of it all and i just wish that i had *anything* to look forward to right now
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𝙷𝚘𝚕𝚒𝚍𝚊𝚢𝚜 𝚠/ 𝙷𝚒𝚖
Your first year living with your favorite lads man and you get to spend the holidays together. How I imagine they act during this holiday season. [Requested by: 🌻 Anon]
𝚉𝚊𝚢𝚗𝚎
𝕋𝕙𝕒𝕟𝕜𝕤𝕘𝕚𝕧𝕚𝕟𝕘
He’s the boyfriend who stands behind you and guides your hands in whatever food you’re prepping
Still a workaholic up until Thanksgiving day, but will find time to help you cook
Suggests to make more desserts because he can’t control his sweet tooth
makes your plate for you “Eat well my love”
tries to start his meal with a slice of pie ; you have to take it and make him eat some actual food first “Desserts are for after the meal” “Desserts can be a meal” “No”
tidying up behind you so much that you don’t even get the chance to help clean up
would definitely do a video call with you to his parents to wish them happy holidays
if you take him home to your family your parents would fall in love with him immediately
ℂ𝕙𝕣𝕚𝕤𝕥𝕞𝕒𝕤
wants all the holiday sweets and treats
the type of boyfriend who wants to take you to every bakery so you can eat their limited time only holiday sweets
he brings you hot chocolate with marshmallows and a splash of peppermint while you decorate the house
stands by holding the decorations for you
he would definitely still be working during this time but, he would spend every moment he could with you when he’s home
watches Christmas movies with you until you fall asleep and he carries you to bed
hides your gifts in his office at the hospital if you start getting nosy
all over you when you’re baking Christmas cookies, showering you in kisses, arms constantly wrapped around you and sneaking a cookie here and there when you’re not looking
Cozy morning w/ Christmas breakfast before you exchange gifts
ℕ𝕖𝕨 𝕐𝕖𝕒𝕣𝕤 𝕂𝕚𝕤𝕤
Wants to give you that New Years kiss you’ve been talking about
takes you to a secluded rooftop patio where you can see the fireworks and share a kiss “Now we’ll last forever” “There was never a doubt in my mind”
if he’s working he rushes home just to give you that kiss at midnight
𝚁𝚊𝚏𝚊𝚢𝚎𝚕
𝕋𝕙𝕒𝕟𝕜𝕤𝕘𝕚𝕧𝕚𝕟𝕘
100% a backseat chef while you’re cooking “You should probably turn the heat down” “Can you go paint or something?”
clingy af he would be all in your face while you’re trying to cook “Are you going to help or are you just gonna hang on me like a koala” “I am helping im here for moral support”
gets extremely competitive when your family pulls out any game “Im about to flip the table” “Please don’t”
Eats so elegantly your parents are wondering if you’re dating royalty (which you are)
ℂ𝕙𝕣𝕚𝕤𝕥𝕞𝕒𝕤
Bought the biggest tree he can find “This is going to take weeks to decorate” “You should just stay here for the rest of the month then”
arts and crafts everything for decorations, he’s painting ornaments with you, anything you can find that you want as a decoration believe he will be making it for you/with you
complains about the cold like he hasn't experienced it before as you drag him to go ice skating or sledding “It’s too cold why is the sun out and i'm still freezing” “Maybe because thats how winter works Raf” “I hate it here”
wakes you up early as hell to open gifts, loves literally anything you buy him
Christmas movie nights w/ face masks, popcorn snacks, and matching pajamas
heavy on the matching pajamas, bought 12 pairs for 12 days of Christmas
ℕ𝕖𝕨 𝕐𝕖𝕒𝕣𝕤 𝕂𝕚𝕤𝕤
watches the fireworks with you through the studio floor to ceiling windows wrapped in a blanket
doesn’t understand why you want a new years kiss so bad, but he’ll gladly do it of course
sips his champagne and pushes the cold liquid into your mouth as he kisses you now you shared a kiss and a drink right at midnight "I call that a two for one deal" "Stop talking"
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𝚇𝚊𝚟𝚒𝚎𝚛
𝕋𝕙𝕒𝕟𝕜𝕤𝕘𝕚𝕧𝕚𝕟𝕘
Fighting tooth and nail to keep his ass out the kitchen “Xavier I got it don’t worry” “I can just stir the yams” “No really it’s fine just go relax you had a long day”
You end up letting him slice the turkey and he ends up slicing through the whole damn pan “Why don’t you just set the table….” “Yes ma’am”
not a single leftover because this man ate everything
if you took him home to your family for Thanksgiving your parents are questioning if you starve him “He has a bottomless pit in his stomach” “No I don’t” “Lie again”
ℂ𝕙𝕣𝕚𝕤𝕥𝕞𝕒𝕤
Cold snowy days you two aren’t leaving the bed, he’s curling around you and snoring softly into your boobs
helps you decorate the tree, but asks endless questions “Where do you want this one?” “Just put it anywhere Xav” “Is right here fine?” “Yes right there is fine” “What about this one?” he’s not trying to annoy you he just wants Christmas with you to be perfect
Cookie decorating together, no cooking so it should be safe
late nights ordering in and watching Christmas movies or reading some books that fit the Christmas aesthetic
ℕ𝕖𝕨 𝕐𝕖𝕒𝕣𝕤 𝕂𝕚𝕤𝕤
watches fireworks with you from the balcony with warm eggnog topped with cinnamon
be prepared to stay up late after that midnight kiss because he’s not stopping, both sets of lips will get kissed
𝚂𝚢𝚕𝚞𝚜
𝕋𝕙𝕒𝕟𝕜𝕤𝕘𝕚𝕧𝕚𝕟𝕘
Spending thanksgiving with him and the boy was like a mini family of it’s own
Luke and Kieran helped you prep and you made Sylus help as well “I need to slow cook these greens overnight so start removing the leaf from the stem please” “Are you telling me what to do?” “Yes …. I am …. is there a problem?”
Sylus constantly sends the twins and Mephisto back to the store so he has a reason to be alone with you while you’re cooking
constantly brings up how the chef should be doing this, but you insist that the whole point is to cook together "You know you can just send a menu to the chef" "No it's more home-y this way"
ℂ𝕙𝕣𝕚𝕤𝕥𝕞𝕒𝕤
hands you his black card and takes you store to store telling you to have fun "I can buy anything I want?" "Anything"
takes you to a privately owned resort (He owns it) for a holiday Christmas trip, bringing Luke and Kieran along begrudgingly because you ‘didn’t want to leave your boys behind’
all those pictures and videos you sent him of fun stuff to do around the holidays he makes it happen
you wanna go snowboarding? he’s on it. Skiing? done. glass blowing Christmas ornaments? done.
Watches with the softest smile on his face as you and the twins decorate the big ass tree you picked out “Sylus I need you” “What is it Princess?” “Let me sit on your shoulders so I can get these ornaments on top of the tree” rolls his eyes, but puts you on his shoulders anyway
wraps you up in his arms and a blanket while you four have a Christmas movie night; carries you to bed when you fall asleep
watches Christmas musicals with you as well
living room is overflowing with gifts for you because this man bought you everything you’ve mentioned that you wanted for the past 3 months
his face may look annoyed when you drag him around from store to store and activity to activity, but he’s more than happy to do it as long as he’s with you
ℕ𝕖𝕨 𝕐𝕖𝕒𝕣𝕤 𝕂𝕚𝕤𝕤
Argues with you until 11:59pm just to piss you off “How does good luck factor into this?” “Im not about to argue with you about this” “Too late sweetie you’ve been arguing with me for the last fifteen minutes” “Because you’re being so difficult do you not want-” he’d shut you up with a kiss right at midnight. “I guess this means we’ll last forever now huh?”
#love and deepspace#sylus love and deepspace#sylus#lnds sylus#love and deepspace sylus#lads#lads rafayel#lads xavier#lads zayne#lads sylus#lnds#lnds x you#lnds xavier#lnds rafayel#lnds zayne#rafayel love and deepspace#xavier love and deepspace#zayne love and deepspace#nikaaaaimagine
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