#im not actually that pissed or anything tbh im just impatient!!

[exculis]

sigh. ok. lets start on the second side of this cardigan. just fucking did this... but lets do it a second time i guess 🙄

[zarovich]

trying not to have a panic attack lol

[gojology]

Strawberry Flavored Pocky.

pairing : teen! gojo x gender neutral reader warnings : the big three: unedited, most likely badly written, and some cursing. also there’s like.. graphic imagery that gojo and reader exchange to eachother. it’s just banter though! wordcount : 2273 a/n : for that one anon that wanted teen gojo. my stroke of genius always occurs when im eating strawberry flavored pocky i swear.. anyways yeah this is unfiltered writing n it’s probably like not the best tbh and maybe i didn’t nail teen gojo’s personality but u know what this was so fun to write

     The sound of the tear of the wrapper containing the Pocky you had just bought was music to your ears, crinkling with every touch. Your fingers are itching to grab for the deliciously coated sticks, but you’re stopped by someone none other than Gojo Satoru himself.       “What’d you get?” he inquired, seemingly unbothered by the face you were making, he hadn’t even greeted you with a simple, “Hello.” he sat down on the bench seat right next to you, uninvited.       In his hand were many bags of various sweet treats, you could only make out some familiar ones- ramune flavored gummies, a bag of chips, vibrantly colored candy. Your lips quirk downwards, exhaling, turning to face the setting sun.       “Just some Pocky.” you flatly respond, beginning to pick the biscuit up. Contrary to Gojo’s wide choice of snacks, you only really had one favorite- Pocky. Specifically, Strawberry flavored Pocky. The sweet, yet somewhat tart aftertaste treat dominated your mind almost day and night. It wasn’t everyday that Yaga would be lenient enough to take the four of you to the local convenience store. You were waiting for Shoko and Geto to finish shopping to finally head home for a night of yummy snacking.       Gojo sighs, lazily dropping the treats right next to his side, they sat idly, limply resting on his thigh as he crossed his right leg over his left knee. His hands warmly nestled into his snowy white hair, his elbows jutting into your personal bubble.        “Not one to chat, are you? What’s the problem? You scared?” his tone is teasing, and you jerk your head to face his. Your head is tilted, like your confused, but in reality you’re just astounded how obnoxious he was.       “Why in the world would I be scared of you? You wouldn’t lay a finger on me. Yaga-Senpai would rip your limbs off one by one and fling you into the horizon! And he’s not even that far away, I could report you to him if you even get on my nerves in the slightest.” you shot back, huffing and taking your first bite on the biscuit. You instantly melt.       He flashes you a toothy smile, and you stiffen, did he ever take anything seriously? “Oh my, so riled up. Only scaredy-cats would talk about how not scared they were. Look, you’re even shaking-” he gestures to your just slightly shaking, tightened grip on your Pocky. “-I win, Y/N! Boo hoo, case closed, gimme your Pocky~”        “No, fuck you and your fat ass trying to take my Pocky, I’m not shaking from fear anyways.” you sternly retort, warmth rushing to your cheeks for whatever reason. “I’m shaking because I’m resisting the urge to duct tape your mouth shut and gouge your eyeballs out.”       He chuckles warmly as if your gruesome detailing was humorous, he probably didn’t know you meant it. He too, ripped open one of his snacks. “Calm down, Y/N. I was joking, I could buy Pocky’s whole stock and probably also buy my position up as CEO if I wanted to. I wouldn’t leech off of you, sugar.” readjusting his crooked, circular shades, he looked down at your now slack grip on the wrapper.      Unanswering, you’re grumbling instead. Under your breath, you’re curious as to how Gojo hasn’t realized how obnoxious he was, and how much longer could he survive without his head exploding from how big it was from his inflated ego?      Gojo grinned. He was all too aware of those things, but who really cared?      “Not unless you let your guard down!-” unable to finish the rest of his sentence, he yanked up the wrapper from your hands, using the extent of his long arm to dangle it high above your head. Your reflexes are far too slow to react, causing you to glare at him in a mixture of shock, hatred, and disbelief.      “Give-” you jump, arm reaching towards your snack, but he backs off, snickering and still dangling it above your head. “It-” now you’ve leapt up on the bench, grabbing at the wrapper to no avail. “Back!-” whimpering and flailing your arms out, every time you came close to retrieving your rightfully owned pack of Pocky, he’d simply throw it to his other hand so carelessly it pissed you off. All the while giggling, juggling it like a clown.      A breath of laughter escapes his lips as he looks at you, prancing around like a circus act on the bench, yelling curses and many death-wishes to his clan. Your eyebrows are knitted together, and he can’t just help but realize how adorable you were when concentrated in getting something- so stubborn.    “Okay, okay!” and as if Gojo had flipped a switch, you simmer down, looking at him with an impatient side-eye. “You want it, doggie?”     “Refer to me as doggie, and I’ll send a pack of strays to ravage you.”       Gojo exhaled out of his nose. “You’re a funny one, doggie.” did he just dismiss the conversation you two were having literally 2 seconds prior? “I’ll ask this again, do you want to get your treats back?” his eyes are glinting with amusement and child-like glee. You were almost sure that he had started calling your beloved Pocky as treats because of just how well it suited the nickname Doggie. It looked like you would be getting no where unless you paid no mind to him calling you such a.. Derogatory name.       Grumbling and studying the concrete you were currently trampling on, you exasperatedly sigh.       “Yes. I do want my Pocky back.” you grunt, averting your gaze to anywhere but Gojo’s shoes.       He perks up in approval, drawing out a long, “Hmmm?” as if he hadn’t expected you to give up so easily. “What are the magic words, Y/N?”       This was so humiliating.       “Please?” you politely say through gritted teeth. If it weren’t for the general public bustling about, you would’ve lunged for his unruly hair and tear it out of his scalp.       “Hah! You think I’m gonna do that sorta bullshit?” he crosses his arms, Pocky tucked safely under his arm. You wince, thinking about how the biscuits may potentially be snapped in half. Did you really want your snack still? It probably smelled like Gojo’s armpit sweat, death, and all the bad things in the world combined. “You’re gonna have to earn it, Y/N, in a game.”       Now convinced that Gojo was the manifestation of all the bad karma that you had avoided, you stare at him with wide eyes and fear, the irritation long gone. Games, no, scratch that, literally anything with Gojo only resulted in a small, or maybe large piece of your sanity torn away from you, lost to the infinite dark abyss. Maybe that’s why Geto seemed to slowly go insane everyday.       “On second thought, I’ll just go-”      He cuts you off, alarm now displayed on full view, his face contorting back to neutral. “Wait, no! It won’t be hard. Pinkie promise.” extending a pinkie towards you, you gently slap it away. The mood change was so instant, you were still shocked, that, and he was almost a legal adult and still believed in pinkie promises.      Still hesitant, you quirk an eyebrow, crossing your arms over your chest. “I’d rather spend another two dollars than play whatever game your planning, unless you tell me about it.”      “That’s a given, besides, it won’t take too long, Y/N. I think you’ll like it.” he replies cheerfully, leaning and whisper-yelling into your ear, fruitfully jolting you up. Seriously, did he have any idea what personal space was?      After just a few seconds of thinking, you roll your eyes in defeat. “Okay, what’s this game?”      His incredibly long fingers inserted themselves inside the crinkling wrapper, pulling out a slender stick. You’re almost sure your salivating, and subconsciously swallow the lump at the back of your throat. “Okay, rules of this game are... Hm, we both place our mouths at both ends of the stick. You get the pretzel part because that part sucks.” mischief flickers in his eyes briefly. “Whoever can get down the Pocky longest without being afraid of kissing and pulling back, loses and doesn’t get the Pocky. Whoever stays in their place wins. I’ll throw in some money, deal or no deal?”       “This doesn’t sound.. Fun.” you were still skeptical, but curiosity was blossoming rapidly inside of you. Could you really resist such an intriguing request? The guy was rich, and he did say he’d throw in some money. Gojo probably hated the thought of you, too. You could probably get up and close, get him to cower away from the thought of locking lips with you, and you’d be on your merry way.       “Um, actually, never mind. Let’s do this.” you chirp, the weariness had depleted completely. Besides, Gojo would pester you into doing it anyways, this would effectively save time. The expression on his face was indecipherable, silently wishing to yourself to see his eyes. You wonder if they’re wide open, in shock of your acceptance.       He gently placed the biscuit between your lips, his thumb brushing against it. Your breath hitches, now he’s up close. The shades adorning his handsome features, concealing those vivid blue eyes of his made your heart pace quicken in just seconds, maybe it was because he could see you- and you couldn’t. Your gaze shifts to the tufts of white hair hanging above his forehead. His bangs look lusciously soft, so soft you wonder what it’d be like to ruffle his unruly hair, what did it smell like? What conditioner did he use?     Your cheeks darken, but you hope he doesn’t notice it. This was what people thought of when they saw pretty people up close, it wasn’t like you had a thing for him, he was just attractive, that’s all.      “You look real stupid holding that stick between your teeth and looking at me.” he comments, charmingly smirking as you give him another death glare, unable to speak in fear of dropping the Pocky stick. You could count each individual hair strand he had on top of his head with the amount of time he was taking.      Chomp.     You take the first bite, and you can’t help but realize how much your heart is fluttering about in your chest. Eyelashes fluttering, nerves getting jittery, the exchange was strangely intimate. No kidding, of course it was- if the two of you were adamant and continued to chomp on the stick, it would only end in a kiss. There was no way around it.      He takes a bite too, his lips look curved in a dopey smile, but there’s not a single word traded between the two of you, just tiny, slight nibbles. It would be eons until someone finished, and you were growing impatient by the minute. Quicken the pace. Quicken the fucking pace.     So you did the unthinkable, you quickened the pace.     Taking a large bite, he pauses for a minute- as if to think, before taking an even larger bite. Now, 2/3′s of the original stick is gone. One more large bite, and a kiss would follow suit. Now, you’re sweating bullets, eyes bouncing from him, back down to the microscopic sized Pocky. His lips are so, so close. Soft, plush pink, so glossy you’re inclined to ask what brand of lip gloss he uses. You can hear his breathing grow heavier, why wasn’t he giving up?      The two of you don’t take a single bite, plainly avoiding the objective, the world around you had evaporated into thin air. It’s you, and Gojo Satoru.      You nibbled a little bit more, and then you make up your mind. You’re going to kiss-       Growing chatter grew closer to closer, and you realize Shoko’s monotone and Geto’s lively voice, alongside a very disgruntled Yaga.       “Yeah, she’s pretty hot. I actually liked the movie- Uh...?” the steady rhythm stopped against the concrete. Immediately, you straighten and clear your throat, spitting out the Pocky stick into the nearby grass. Gojo follows suit, shoving his hands deep into his pockets and twirling around. “Oh hey, Geto!-”       “Are we interrupting something? Something.. Important?” Shoko quizzes, struggling to stifle her giggling. A sheepish smile was displayed widely on your face for the world to see, hands behind your back like you were hiding something. Gojo, on the other hand, is facing the other direction, whistling and staring at the now setting sky.       You stutter, cheeks growing even darker. Yaga looks as disgruntled as ever, facepalming and murmuring to himself. Geto looks ecstatic.        “MY MAN!” he beams. “WERE YOU GOING TO-”       “SHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!” Shoko shushes him in response, turning her head back to the two of you. You looked like you had just seen a ghost. “We thought you hated Gojo, we’re just...” her head is cocked slightly, an understanding expression on her features. “Just surprised, is all.”       Spluttering, you try to explain yourself- but no sound comes out. Your mouth is opening and closing, struggling to find the words.       “I do hate him... I just... He.. Pocky.. He uh...”       “Sheeeeeeeesh! Poor Y/N over here is going through some shock right now!” Gojo muses aloud, he places an arm around your shoulders, pulling you in under his arm. There’s a small, coy grin on his lips. As if he didn’t try kissing you 1 minute ago. “Just ignore them, anyways, what are we having for dinner tonight? I heard there’s a really good KBBQ place down the street that just opened..”      As much as you hate Gojo, his ability to escape anything did come in handy.    Well, maybe you didn’t hate him as much as you were leading on.     You’d go as far as to say.. Maybe you enjoyed some parts of him.      

[chaoxfix]

couple of posts have me thinking about characterization details for my usual kiddos.

gonna go ahead and share my grab bag / expectations of characterization / action items / tics that i use for sonic n tails while writing them.

happy

tails: when overjoyed or surprised by something happy, will sometimes start flying without thinking about it. other overjoyed tics: extremely expressive with his hands. fist pumps. a little bit bouncing off the walls. very energetic when happy. when he's less over the top, just content, he might hum or chatter about everything he's working on. and he generally tends to be a pretty happy kid so this is pretty common.

sonic: when overjoyed, shows it with his whole body, and its very over the top. i just keep thinking of that scene in sonic x when he finds the field of flowers he's been looking for -- where he smiles with his whole face, leaps into the air, and then jumps into the void with a whoop. when he's really happy he's simply :D ... when hes mildly content he tends to be less energetic about it. prone to smiling while trying to nap when he's in a good mood. mellow, leans back and relaxes. remember: chronic napper

proud/confident:

tails: when he's extremely proud, he shows it with his whole body. hands on hips, chest puffed out. sassy. when he's only a little proud and still prone to a little insecurity and what-ifs, he tends to start off strong then get more shy about it. very much enjoys hair ruffles during this time. when hes younger hes more prone to insecurity and self doubt and he needs reassured -- sonic & other close friends are usually pretty good about reinforcing his confidence and giving him a boost if he loses confidence. and when he's older -- the nose thumb smirk combo is a tic he picks up. he's gotta figure out how to do it right and uses it much more sparingly than his big brother.

sonic: the nose thumb smirk combo. he feels very cool while doing it. chest puffs out sometimes if he's really bragging. enjoys showing off more than almost anything in the world and will do it at no charge any time he can possibly do it. tends to be very loud while showing off, unapologetically. tends to raise his voice and shout quips; insults enemies, shouts jokes to friends, and gives instructions to teammates when needed. this is his default when he's in a fight. the 15 year old jock really shows when he's excited. but he tends to be less "did you see what i did?? :D" and more so "heh. can't believe you thought you'd beat me" -- frankly just imagine a "heh" + the smirk/nose rub any time he beats something, and youve got him down.

anger

tails: slow burn anger tends to be more common. that one's associated with him clenching his fists, muttering about others' stupid ideas. scheming to get his way. i see him as holding grudges longer than sonic. when hes really mad in the moment and actually loses his temper, he tends to shout and speak his mind with some very cutting remarks. he has 'im always right' syndrome and he can say some very mean things when he doesn't get his way. accidentally (or on purpose if he’s mad enough) shows his very sharp carnivore teeth.

sonic: tenses up ready for a fight, clench fists, puff out his quills if he’s really mad, get close and personal with the object of his anger and really get in their face, bare his teeth. if he’s extremely angry he tends to get quieter and intensely focused, whereas if he’s only very angry he has been known to shout. if he’s just slightly mad he’ll pick a fight and try to solve it physically, and say some passive aggressive but hurtful things. he’s great at figuring out peoples insecurities or giving them new ones if need be. he doesn’t often get extremely angry, usually just annoyed. he’s not hot tempered, just impatient. when hes pissed he looks kind of terrifying; his quills are puffed out, his teeth are bared, and he looks like he's getting ready to claw your face out at high speeds. (and tbh he will)

nervous:

tails: he's got a lot of tics for this. fidgeting with his tails, looking up anxiously for sources of support (usually sonic) to figure out what to do or for comfort -- especially when hes younger. he will tinker a little more obsessively because he needs to be helping (but he gets a bit clumsier the worse his nervousness gets). he denies being nervous though, all big eyes and ‘no no no it’s ok!!! i’m ok! look at what i’m making, it’ll help us!’. when nervousness blooms into full anxiety he wrings his tails and starts borrowing from his scared tics as well. he’d be a nail / claw biter without gloves (and tbh he might remove them if he's anxious enough). he’s not great about talking about his feelings but if some asks just the right questions he’ll hug them and talk just a little, though tends to give nonverbal answers, lots of mmhms and nn-nns or head nodding or shaking when hes anxious enough. he likes to be reassured and told things will be alright even if he’s still scared they won’t be.

sonic: tapping. endless fucking tapping. mainly fingers and feet. when he feels any emotion strongly there’s always an urge to run, but nervousness especially. he’s not kidding about ‘if you have time to worry, then run’ - if he’s nervous, he wants to be running to figure out exactly what he can do to stop worrying about it. so if he’s not running, he wants to be. if he cant run ... well, he still needs to move more than he currently is, and that means tapping. if given something to fidget with he will also use that, such as card shuffling, rubix cubes, etc, or taking things apart and putting them back together. when nervousness turns to full anxiety — he runs regardless of whether hes supposed to or not. he doesn’t want people seeing him legitimately anxious/worried if it’s something within his control (and hed never get anxious about a bot; his instinct there is to fight, even to the death -- he legitimately cant get anxious here, its just not what he would do). but if its something outside his control such as a friend being hurt already, and he can’t run/leave, he paces. he moves, no matter how annoying it’ll be to others. he’s prone to either going totally silent and freezing people out, or going to the other extreme if someone asks what’s wrong — he’ll ramble and give 50 reasons why everything is fine actually or explain why actually hes not worried about the obvious thing and instead worried about [anything else] to deflect. if a friend is hurt and it’s inappropriate to lighten the mood, he tends to shift his anxiety into anger and picks a fight with someone. if he can’t do that... well, he's out of moves. he won't ever cry in front of another person if he can help it. but the anxiety might affect him physically with a stomach ache or lashing out inappropriately.

scared

tails: very jumpy when scared. prone to yelling from fear. seeks comfort wherever he can find it. he will jump into your lap during a thunderstorm and he will not apologize. hes embarrassed but can't overcome instinct, not til he's significantly older. when scared of non-phobia things, it tends to be because he's afraid for his friends. hes pretty good about trusting his friends to get out of bad situations. but sometimes the odds are intense even for them -- tics for this include: wringing his tails, fidgeting, shaking hands, tiny pupils and big eyes (the trauma look, you know the one), etc. when he's scared for himself, his fur sometimes puffs up to make him look bigger/scarier than he is -- has terrible side effect of making him look even cuter when he's under 11. when he grows up it might work though, especially if paired with bared teeth/anger tics in an attempt to defend himself.

sonic: on low levels, he can occasionally be startled but usually tries to be too cool to shout. something's got to really freak him out for him to react to being snuck up on. his fight/flight/freeze response is almost always fight though. in higher levels though, fear isn't really a common emotion for him; nervousness, or anxiety sometimes, but outright fear lasting longer than a second or two, no. when he feels it, it's almost exclusively on behalf of his friends -- and only if there is genuinely nothing he can do for them. and even then, it overlaps with anger. tends to puff out his quills to look more intimidating. regarding his waterphobia ... it's something he tends to manipulate his way out of before he can actually face it -- by any means possible. he'll lie cheat steal end friendships etc if it means not having to face it which i think says something about his ability to relate to strong, uncomfortable emotions. he's got an extreme aversion to it, and will do his best to find any way out when forced in. i imagine any time he actually has to be underwater he's got a hard time rationalizing being afraid. racing heart and shaking hands and helplessness be damned, he's not 'afraid'. he convinces himself he's annoyed with it and anyone who had anything to do with it.

bored/calm

tails: calmest when he's gotten into the groove of making/fixing something. he can go for hours and get into such a groove that he doesn't notice anything around him. his longest stretch was 20 hours in a row -- and tbh he only stopped because sonic got back from a few days' trip and realized tails was still up at 5am. when he's bored, he gets a little pouty. he likes helping and doing things. it's not torture to be bored the way it is for sonic, but he does itch for something to do. if he has paper in front of him he'll doodle designs for future projects, but would much prefer to have gear to actually do something with.

sonic: napping. he's got 2 speeds: stop and go. /jk (but not really). when he's calm, he's lounging, w/e. he's storing up his energy for nefarious purposes and planning new property damage as he naps. but if he's bored, he wants something to do -- starts tapping hands/feet, pacing, looking around the room he's in for something to do, or just goes for a run. true boredom is torture for him but he's pretty good at entertaining himself as long as he's not like, trapped somewhere. then it really is torture.

affectionate:

tails: still pretty young so tends to want to receive affection more than give it (and his guardian doesnt really want physical affection, so if he did just want to give it to show affection, it wouldnt be all that wanted, and he picks up on that). when he gets older, he'll be a bit more affectionate to others on occasion though (amy and cream have been his friends for long enough that he learns to do more than just fist-bump to show affection). sometimes will hair-ruffle other kids when he gets older. but as a kid, he likes to be hugged, picked up, hair-ruffled, fist-bumped, etc. has to be in the mood for it though, or seeking comfort in some way. not a big fan of being grabbed/hugged/touched etc if he's not in the mood, as it makes him feel like a kid. (7/8 is the age he starts getting annoyed being treated like a kid, while also still wanting all the benefits of being a kid such as hiding in his big brother's chest/lap/under his bed when hes scared) expresses a lot of love thru imitation when he's really little. biggest way to show love though, is gift-giving -- much more than words or physical affection. if he really loves someone he'll build them something they can use.

sonic: shows love thru action first and foremost. if he cares about someone he'll show them by showing up/finding things they like/saving them from killer robots etc. only occasionally physically affectionate, and only on the giving end of affection. simply does not know what to do with affection when on the receiving end (except when others are being affectionate to him in an attempt to seek comfort, then hes fine with it - to an extent. even he has his limits/boundaries). when he's feeling affectionate to others though, he tends to show it more so verbally. with actions to show he cares, or in small gestures like fist-bumps etc. small note: he doesn't see carrying people as affection, just as a way to take people from one place to another -- if someone gets too cuddly while he's carrying them he gets very :/ about it (with one obvious exception bc thats his kid brother and tails only cuddles when he needs to). in sleep, sometimes will wake up hugging someone. tends to hug pillows when solo sleeping. very well-adjusted to the idea that he'll never be the little spoon (quills). ...for him, the solution to being touch starved is to pick a fight with someone who can physically throw him. (this is why so many of his rivalries seem like being more-than-friends imo, this is the most touch he ever receives willingly lol and they still have to work for it to land a hit)

[miracvlovs]

✗✗✗   you see [ kaleb yıldırım ] around lately? yeah i heard that the [ cis male ] is up to no good. [ he / him ] has been here for [ five years ] now but they’re still pretty [ abrasive ] which is fine because they’re also [ debonair ] so it balances out. the [ twenty-eight ] year old [ hitman for hire ] actually looks like a lot like [ alperen duymaz ], don’t you think? it’s best to watch out, though, because it’s been said that they’re really into [ strong cigarettes & even stronger whiskey ].

hey, hello, hi, bonjour! s’up buttercups? ‘tis i, your friendly neighbourhood loser chrissie ( a.k.a an irish doofus who is utter plot trash and the actual WORST at keeping track with discord messages, oops ) and i’m super duper excited to be here among you fab human beings! anywho, this is my first kiddo kaleb and he is … how do you say … morally grey. basically his morals are very questionable in every aspect. but! on the plus side, he’s very talented and good at his job even if he is ruthless and callous, oop. he is … the worst and also lowkey messed up inside tbh so pls excuse his blunt and sarcastic nature. plot-wise i’m open to literally anything and everything so come at me with any ideas ya got! i’m always diggity down to spit ball ideas and form some dope connections so pls feel free to invade my ims or hmu on le cord ( chrissie.#9606 ) and we can brainstorm until our heart’s content! if ya wanna, go ahead and light that lil grey heart up red and i’ll shimmy my butt your way for all of the good stuff. anywho, let’s get down to the nitty-gritty, shall we?

fundamentals.

KALEB EMER YILDIRIM     —     twenty-eight, hitman for hire,   +   one snarky son of a gun   /   troubled dude with daddy issues   /   all issues tbh ! 

aesthetics   ➤   dried blood caked into the grooves of cut knuckles, the lingering scent of smoke and gasoline, silver slivers of past scarring, five o’clock shadow peppering a blunt jawline, discolourations of blue and purple decorating battered hands, a subtle smirk etched upon a devious countenance, calloused fingertips riddled with small paper cuts, dark circles under almost-black eyes, the noise of screeching tires in the middle of the night, a tall stature adorned in all-black attire, ghosts of bruises staining calloused skin green, a scuffed zippo lighter in a pack of marlboros containing only one cigarette, white shirts with the sleeves rolled up to the elbows, a sly grin under stormy dark eyes, a sniper on the roof of a deserted building, the roar of a car engine, & clenched, white-knuckled fists.

nicknames. kal.

date of birth. november third.

gender. cis male.

pronouns. he + him.

birthplace. manhattan, nyc.

orientation. bisexual + aromantic.

education. bachelor of music degree obtained from manhattan school of music.

spoken languages. can speak fluent english, turkish, spanish, & french.

negative traits. haughty, abrasive, enigmatic, cynical, temperamental, calculating, hedonistic, distant, sarcastic, & volatile.

positive traits. adept, diligent, charming, resilient, candid, adept, charming, audacious, determined, & resourceful.

strengths. efficient, energetic, self-confident, strong-willed, strategic thinker, charismatic, & inspiring.

weaknesses. stubborn, dominant, intolerant, impatient, arrogant, poor handling of emotions, cold, & ruthless.

talents. piano, retaining information, memory recall, lock-picking, carjacking, hand-to-hand combat, automobile knowledge, tracking people down, & excellent problem-solving abilities. 

physiology. dark brown eyes. dark brown hair. six feet, one inch tall. of a lean, broad stature with a straight posture and evident height. has a few silvery scars littered across his skin. has a few tattoos in a few less visible places. is ambidextrous.

psychology. scorpio zodiac. water element. slytherin house. entj-a. chaotic neutral. type eight enneagram. choleric temperament. interpersonal intelligence type. addicted to alcohol, tobacco, prescription drugs, cocaine, and cannabis. suffers from addiction and insomnia. his vices are lust, wrath and pride. his virtues are ... honestly, probably just diligence tbh.

background.

possible triggers   :   infidelity, divorce, alcoholism, drug abuse, cancer, death, car crash, funeral, blood, murder, suicide mention, gun mention, & various references to death and murder. 

a synopsis.   ah, here he is—my tol, troubled, grouchy son : ' ) don't u just adore ur resident trashy, snarky, but precious and sad fuckboi muse? bc i know I DO! anyways, before i digress, i'll cut to the chase. so, waaay before he blessed the universe with his presence, his mother ( who was originally from turkey ) moved to the states where she met one alexander hale. you can probably guess the rest: the pair married, they had children, everything seemed to be going swimmingly, yada yada. here’s a lil background: the hale family—a line of manhattan-born businessmen / lawyers / diplomats etc. they're dripping in wealth, not always as squeaky clean as they portray themselves as to be. kaleb’s dad was a douche, expected both of his sons to follow in his shadow and become lawyers, ran around behind his wife's back: the whole shoot and shebang of a classic a-hole. he always kind of ignored kaleb in favour of his eldest son joshua so kaleb kinda became hard-hearted and resentful due to the lack of his father's attention. skip a few years and he spied his dad cheating on his mother with his secretary though he refused to tell another soul for fear of any potential backlash. soon enough, his mother found this out for herself, their argument ruined his thirteenth birthday party then they divorced soon after. his mother fell off the wagon, became terminally ill—all while his father was remarrying and expecting a daughter with his secretary. it was a hella rough two years for kaleb. it got even worse. eventually, his mother passed away and his step-mother divorced his father to breeze off into the sunset with her new lover; leaving her daughter with her piss-poor excuse of a dad. at this point, kaleb was lonely and angry but adopted the role of his step-sister's protector, shielding her from their father's increasing substance abuse induced violence. just before his seventeenth birthday, his father died in a car crash. of course, he didn't entirely mourn the loss. almost immediately, he and his younger sister moved in with their elder brother who helped kaleb get into university. with dear ole dad out of the picture, he could finally pursue his interest and flair for music. after he graduated, he moved to santa ysabel with his brother and brother's family. in the beginning, things were going fine. yeah, sure, he was struggling for work and felt bad that his brother had to keep him afloat. normal stuff. then, one day, things quickly turned sour in his world. [ TRIGGER FOR GORE, BLOOD, SUICIDE MENTION, GUN MENTION, MURDER, DEATH ] he’d came home to find the locks on the doors busted, advancing into the house carefully only to find his brother’s lifeless corpse crumbled on the kitchen tiles: his throat and wrists slashed, posed as a suicide. of course, kaleb knew better. he knew his brother; knew he would never leave him or his family. upon further inspection of the house, he’d discovered the body of his wife upstairs: a bullet hole between her eyes. [ TRIGGER OVER ] the whole ordeal was enough to turn his stomach but once the sickness had subsided, all kaleb felt was a strong thirst for blood. sure, it was pretty damn stupid to try and seek revenge or whatnot ... but kaleb had always been one to let his heart guide his brain. anyways, time skip now to the moment he’d uncovered his brother’s entanglement with some dodgy loan shark, drug dealing criminals who were responsible for his murder. in the end, he’d hunted them down and eradicated them one by one, over a span of weeks. at first, he hated himself and what his desire for vengeance had turned him into but he kept going until he’d got them all: until he’d grown numb. truthfully, how he wound up taking lives for a living is beyond him. he woke up one day, found himself hired by some big-wig businessman who wanted rid of his business partner and et voilà, he was tangled up in the dark side of existence. i mean, was he blackmailed into doing his first paid hit? yes. but who can blame him? especially when they claimed to have intel regarding the sudden demise of a prominent figure in the criminal underbelly of the city, a.k.a his brother’s killer. it was a risk kaleb simply couldn’t take. he prefers to keep himself anonymous, hidden behind shadows, unsuspecting. death has become a job. nothing more. nothing less. it’s simply the algorithm of his existence: receive a dossier, take care of the target, get paid a hefty lump sum. and all just for enacting a stranger’s revenge in the blood of another. he moves like a deadly phantom, his footsteps light as a feather, whipping through the night like a bullet through a target’s skull. sartre claims that hell is other people. and if you were to stare into kaleb’s eyes—eyes eerily similar to having been cut from coal—you might just see hell and everyone in it staring right back at you. as nietzsche wrote: “ he who fights with monsters should be careful lest he thereby become a monster. and if thou gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will also gaze into thee. ”

random extras.

he has a lot of small scars over his body, most of which he can’t account for or has forgotten about.

owns and drives a black 1969 boss 429 mustang which he loves arguably more than he loves himself.

speaking of, he actually is full of self-hatred so don’t let the haughtiness fool you.

trusts nobody but himself and is loyal to nobody but himself.

has a lot of anger issues so often ends up taking part in underground fights.

he rates around a solid three on the kinsey scale.

is a distant person; closed-off emotionally and prefers to keep himself to himself.

when it comes to whether or not he is morally decent or an extremely bad person, he is somewhere in the middle of that spectrum.

he isn’t heartless but he isn’t exactly compassionate either.

kind of shady but knows how to pass himself as charming. 

has been thru sum shit n seen sum shit so he’s v messed up inside.

though he does have a soft spot for animals and children.

his marksmanship is impeccable.

he’s naturally gifted with firearms and his shot is always on point.

dark eyes and bruised knuckles are his ultimate aesthetic tbh.

actually really appreciates classical music, though he’ll never tell. blame it on his piano lessons from childhood.

speaking of piano, he’s low key gifted at playing although he rarely does these days.

has a very short fuse and can lose his temper quite easily.

he has a good heart and good intentions when it comes to those he actually cares about although he’ll never let this show.

favourite coping mechanism? isolation.

a bit of a lone wolf. he keeps people at arm’s length but acts in a way where people are under the illusion he’s their friend.

basically the tall, dark and handsome trope: ( most of the tall, dark and handsome men display aloof, cold and distant personality but they do have a gentle and caring side. )

is a little snarky and grumpy but if you manage to break this exterior, you’ll find he’s quite witty and easy going.

he got into fighting at a young age. it was the only way to try and learn how to defend himself against his father.

sleep?? he doesn’t know her.

tends to repress his emotions until he explodes.

healthy coping mechanisms?? he doesn’t know them either.

is prone to pushing the self destruct button.

you can find a pinterest board for him by clicking anywhere here.

[gatinthehat]

me: NO MORE SPENDING i Have to save my money for the end of this month

me: *spots a saints row 360 faceplate on ebay*

me:

me:

me: hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

me: *buys it* fucks sake

[eldritchsurveys]

o69.

Whose place did you last chill at and with who? >> I guess that would be the Wayland house, with Sparrow and the kids and eventually her parents. I wasn’t actively chilling with anyone, though, because I was largely preoccupied with my IMs.

What woke you up this morning? >> I think just routine, or maybe I heard a noise from Sparrow getting ready for work and I was in the light-sleep zone already so it woke me the rest of the way up. Who knows, either way, it was a good time to get up.

How many hours of sleep did you get last night? >> About seven.

Has your heart ever truly ached for somebody? >> I guess that’s something I’ve experienced at some point.

Last time you wore the opposite sex’s clothing? >> When I put clothing on my body, it stops being anything but MY clothing, so. ~

Are you going to get hurt anytime soon? >> I mean, I can’t predict the future.

Anybody tell you they miss you lately? >> No.

Are you a good babysitter? >> I probably could be, but I don’t actually know because I haven’t had the opportunity to find out.

Have you ever kissed someone who was high? >> Yeah.

Are you an alcoholic? >> Nope.

What were you doing at 4am this morning? >> Sleeping.

Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? >> There’s nothing difficult at all about kissing Can Calah.

You’re trapped in a room for three days with the last person you hooked up with, what do you do? >> Whomst?

When is the last time you were in a photo booth taking pictures, with who? >> I’m not sure I’ve ever done it at all, unless I’ve just forgotten.

Explain the last time you threw up: >> For some reason, I totally forgot to order food at J Gardella’s and just ordered drinks, and a variety of drinks at that... what’s funny is, I haven’t been back there since, not really for any reason except that I kind of forgot it existed.

Have you ever made up/sang a song for someone you cared about? >> I’ve sang for people I cared about, but not songs I wrote. Once I sang Since I’ve Been Loving You by Led Zeppelin at live-band karaoke for Raven.

Ever had a song sang about/for you? >> I don’t think so.

Kissed someone older than you? >> Yeah.

Are you in a good mood? >> Sure, I’m mostly just impatiently waiting for Journey to download so I can play it, haha. Figured if anything would burn through 20 minutes, it’d be a survey.

Are all of your friends in relationships? >> Probably.

When was the last time you had a real smile on your face? >> When I realised that Journey is incidentally on sale on the same day I finally decided to take the plunge and buy it. Nice synchronicity there.

When you’re cranky, do you take it out on others? >> Sometimes. Mostly I try to keep to myself so there’s less temptation.

Do you ever suddenly jolt awake when you’re almost asleep? >> Yeah, and I also hate it when I get sleep-paralysed (which was a thing that usually happened to me when waking up, but recently I realised it was starting to happen when going to sleep, too).

Has a bookshelf or desk, etc, of yours ever randomly collapsed? >> No.

What’s the longest you ever stayed at someone else’s house? >> Without living there, about a week.

What time is it right now? >> 3.31p EST.

Have you ever been lead on? >> I don’t know.

Do you know a secret about your ex and if he/she pisses you off, will you tell? >> I may be a bastard, but no; that’s not the kind of bastard I am.

Is there anybody you wish you could be spending time with right now? >> I’m all right the way I am.

Are you excited about anything today? >> I’m pretty interested in finally seeing this highly-acclaimed game for myself. And also excited about going back to the Farmers’ Market tomorrow.

Do you think the last person you kissed is nice? >> That’s not the word I’d use for him, because it doesn’t mean enough to me. It’s a blanket adjective for more astute ones.

Tattoos are hot, right? >> Sometimes, sure.

Do you have a good relationship with your mother? >> I don’t have a relationship with my mother at all.

Next time you will kiss someone on the lips?                                         >> IDK, whenever.

What are you doing tomorrow? >> Going to the Farmers’ Market and then going to the Wayland house, I assume (unless something’s changed that I haven’t been made aware of).

Do people ever call you by your last name? >> Nah. They’re welcome to, though.

Name something you dislike about the day you’re having? >> I can’t think of anything.

What are you sitting on right now? >> The loveseat.

Have you ever been with someone while they were throwing up? >> Yeah.

Did you speak to your father today? >> Nope.

Meet anybody new this week? >> Nope.

Any upcoming events you’re excited about? >> Eh, not really.

What movie do you wanna see? >> I mean, a bunch...

Do you wear shorts a lot? >> Not a lot. It’s hard for me to find pairs I actually like. I support the right for everyone to walk around with really short shorts on, but can we diversify the styles a bit? I’d like to keep my ass covered, thanks.

What’s something you really want right now, be honest? >> TBH, I’m good right now.

How do you feel about your hair right now? >> It’s just hair.

Are you going through any type of pain at this exact moment? >> Not really.

What is the heaviest thing you carried today? >> The box from Chewy.com that got delivered earlier.

How do you feel about the weather today? >> It’s all right, but I wouldn’t want to be out in the sunlight.

Are you friends with all of your exes? >> Not all of them, no. One’s even dead, so, you know.

You’re locked in a room with your most recent ex. Any problems? >> Yeah, the fact that I’m locked in a room at all. Doesn’t matter who I’m with, being locked in a room is not my idea of a good time. When was the last time you received a compliment? >> I don’t remember.

Is it more common for your phone’s ringer to be on or for it to be on vibrate? >> Vibrate.

What did your last text message say? >> Something about Sparrow being really happy that Gus likes his new cat toy.

What’s the closest thing to you that’s purple? >> Part of a plushie’s outfit.

How many people have texted you today? Did you reply to all of them? >> Just Sparrow, and yeah.

Have you ever gone camping? >> Yes. 

When was the last time you drank something with alcohol? >> I had a bottle and a half of Backwoods Bastard on Wednesday.

What is/was your school uniform like? Did you like it? >> ---

Was the last person you held hands with a boy or girl? >> A female.

Do you miss the way things used to be? >> What things?

Have you ever slept with a member of the opposite sex without having sex? >> Yes.

Miss anyone you shouldn’t? >> No.

Would you like to put last night on repeat, and live it forever? >> No.

What would you say if someone asked you to get high right now? >> That depends on who the someone is, what exactly they wanted to get high on, and what I’d have to do for it.

When’s the next time you will consume alcohol? >> Tomorrow, maybe. If not then, who knows.

Do you believe that everything happens for a reason? >> I believe in cause and effect, which is essentially that, yeah.

When’s the next time you will go shopping? >> Tomorrow morning.

Did you wake up in the middle of the night last night? >> Nope! Finally.

How do you feel right now? >> Pretty good. And Journey just finished!

Describe what you are wearing in detail? >> Iron Man PJ pants and an a-frame shirt.

Where were you at 7pm? >> Last night? In basically the same spot, but I was watching Property Brothers with Sparrow.

Could you do a long distance relationship? >> Yeah.

Have you spent money this week? If so, on what? >> Well, I bought this video game. 

Would you rather have love or trust? >> Yawn.

Do you pour the cereal before the milk or vice versa? >> Cereal before milk.

[crying-saeyoung]

Hey, could you do what you think the RFA+V+Saeran's reaction would be to finding out that MC is actually, like, 12. No romance, of course. Just SFW stuff :)

I really like platonic asks and they’re a lot easier to write so this was a good kick start to doing headcanons for the night! Thank you for the cute request     -Green💚

Yoosung:

-he is kinda excited tbh 

-yoosung finds himself getting along with people your age more easily because he’s kinda young himself 

-and you don’t tease him like everyone else does!!! fuckin SCORE!!

-he will show you all of his games!! you play games all night

-yoosung you are ruining this child stop 

-he’s the really cool and friendly older friend that you brag to everyone about 

-Yoosung finally feels cool for once oh my god he luvs u 

Saeyoung:

-ok so Saeyoung is basically a really cool but HORRIBLE DAD 

-he literally went up to you when he came in the apartment to protect you and just went “I’m your dad now go tf to bed” 

-UNCOOL 

-no but he fucking makes dad jokes ALL DAY and it’s so horrible when he’s IGNORING YOU 

- “Saeyoung what are you doing? I’m bored!!”

- “Hey “I’m bored”, I’m fuckin BUSY” 

-he’s so sassy to you oh my god tone it down they are literally 12 

-Saeyoung can’t help but feel responsible for you though. He cooks for you even if he’s trying to get you to not like him (WHEN HE’S CALLING HIMSELF YOUR DAD. YOU CANT IGNORE SOMEONE AND BE LIKE ‘BUT IM UR DAD THO’), and he’ll make you cool new toys 

-by toys I mean WEAPONS because you need to protect yourself you are a child 

-once everything is in the clear tho and you, a 12 year old literally go through the religious cult shit and help him save his brother, you really are like his kid. If you don’t have parents to return to, he will gladly take you in and raise you in a quirky Saeyoung way. rewards for learning is chips like omg

-you are tempted to say you have no parents 

Jumin:

-you thought saeyoung was bad? HAH 

-the worst father 

-HE IS SO STRICT WHEN YOU COME TO HIS HOUSE (house????) 

-i don’t know why he doesn’t just send you home, but he makes you stay and schedules tutors to come so you don’t get to skip school now its just 1000x harder 

-THANKS JUMIN

-no but he is so worried about you. and very nervous like he’s sweating because he doesn’t want to fuck this up and have you hate him 

-cause this guy is a sucker for kids guys. so while he’s basically putting you in your own god damn private school he’s spoiling you like crazy 

-you have this billionaire wrapped around your finger and he doesn’t even deny it 

Jaehee:

-… c h i l d…. 

-is very very tempted to speed to the apartment and send you home right away when she learns your age 

-but saeyoung is like “it’s chill” but it is NOT C H I L L SAEYOUNG

-the whole time Jaehee kinda just is salty towards saeyoung because WHY WOULD YOU KEEP A CHILD ALL ALONE IN AN APARTMENT…

-what about s ch oool

-so she offers to tutor you through the messenger while you miss fucking 2 weeks of school 

-she is now your mother. did you not understand how something worked?? boom now you know it all and the history of it 

-the two of you get along really well tho. she’s always inviting you to her coffee shop for private tutoring lessons and just hang out sessions

-your official babysitter if your parents are out of town 

Zen:

-slams himself into a wall when he hears you are 12 year old because he was hitting on you so hard 

-takes this as a learning experience and now when people come up to him he makes a habit of asking for age (why didn’t you have the habit before-hand??)

-is now the Cool Older Brother who will kick all of your bullies asses 

-but you can never tell him if you have a boyfriend because he will literally sit him down and give your bf the Talk 

-you would rather tell your god damn dad then tell Zen 

-so he’s pretty protective. but other than protective he’s super chill with you and likes to sass you like there is no tomorrow 

-when he has the dream about Unknown breaking in, Zen doesn’t even hesitate omg. He is so much more impatient and is ready to kick Saeyoung’s ass if he doesn’t give him the address right N O  W

-he will constantly be giving you beauty tips and giving you makeovers while talking about his new shows and how men are wolves so only hang out with chicks okay 

V:

-what is this sassy, lost child doing here 

-he doesn’t want you there at all bc he knows what’s going on and he is so afraid for your safety,, 

-but you’re sassy and persistent on helping out the RFA so instead of you staying at the apartment all alone, he comes and lives with you for the time being 

-he is constantly out of the house bc of his “travels” but it makes him feel much better knowing where you are and staying communicated with you through just texting and not the messenger 

-though he makes his “Travels” a lot shorter so he can come back to the apartment and make sure you’re fed and put in bed. 

-V keeps to himself though and tries not to make anything personal or get too attached to you 

-it doesn’t work where can he sign the adoption forms

Saeran:

-he didn’t?????? know??? that he sent a 12 year old to an apartment?????

-even when he broke in he didn’t fucking know ajdnakjdg

-it wasn’t until you came to infiltrate Mint Eye that he knew and that kind of made him stop for a minute 

-staring at you in the cell, scared and clinging to Saeyoung.. fuck, that pissed him off. 

-he wanted to rip you away from Saeyoung. You weren’t safe with him! He would ruin you… ruin your future… just like he did with him. 

-Saeran basically looks at you and sees himself. 

-so privately he meets with you outside the cell and he offers you to leave Mint Eye and pretend like nothing happened. He doesn���t… want to ruin you. You’re too young. Too pure for paradise. 

-when you refuse, it irks him, but he was expecting it. He almost likes how much fire you have in you even when you’re quivering in your shoes.

-so he lays off of you. pretends to not see you. Saeran really doesn’t want you a part of this, but since you won’t leave… he’ll pretend like you aren’t even there, and it’s just him and Saeyoung. 

-it’s much easier not to feel guilty that way. 

[pchoo]

frick all of them for VOLTRON just bc u need something different than me.

thi S IS GONNA SUCK THERES NOT MUch i dont liKe about voltron..........

1. What OTPs in your fandom(s) do you just not get?*

uUHUH.... i don’t know........ there isn’t a pairing i don’t like. oops

2. Are there any popular fandom OTPs you only BroTP?*

not rl y... though i think i prefer hunk/lance as a BroTP rather than a ship? but both are still pretty good.... god

3. Have you ever unfollowed someone over a fandom opinion?

i think so... yeah. pretty sure i have. but i don’t want to say why otherwise i might get my Ass Kicked

4. Do you have a NoTP in your fandom? Are they a popular OTP?*

NnOoooope

5. Has fandom ever ruined a pairing for you?*

idK why but.... sometimes when i see Sheith stuff i get a little irked? still a gr8 pairing but.. idk why that happens maybe im just too into klance lmao

6. Has fandom ever made you enjoy a pairing you previously hated?*

nah because i was always open to All Pairings

7. Is there anything you used to like but can’t stand now?*

nope

8. Have you received anon hate? What about?*

never ever

9. Most disliked character(s)? Why?

IDK...... fuckin zarkon??? actuall y .. haggar too

10. Most disliked arc? Why?

idk if its really an arc, but in season 2 where lance has a crisis about not having a “thing”?? like... what was the point of that honestly it literally got solved with one shot with his gun and all of a sudden hes a sharp shooter. could’ve done that better imo

11. Is there an unpopular character you like that the fandom doesn’t? Why?

well the fandom doesn’t HATE HIM at all but. MATTHEW HOLT I LOVE U....

12. Is there an unpopular arc that you like that the fandom doesn’t? Why?

man idk..... can i say an arc i hate that the fandom loves?? because galra keith still pisses me off lmao

13. Unpopular opinion about XXX character?

yeah, hunk needs more fuckin love, guys

14. Unpopular opinion about your fandom?

sweats i think everyone is a lil too much of a tightass about ships sometimes for reasons i won’t mention. just. its fuckin fiction okay. chill out

15. Unpopular opinion about the manga/show?

i am disappointed in season 2 and how keith-focused it was lmao sorry i love you keith but come on. i know he didn’t get much in season 1 so maybe they were making up for that?? idk but.... i felt like more characters deserved the spotlight too

16. If you could change anything in the show, what would you change?

i would’ve brought matt back in season 2 because i’m an impatient ass

17. Instead of XYZ happening, I would have made ABC happen…

aside from my prevIOUS answer..... i wouldn’t have had keith be part galran. no.

18. Does not shipping something ‘popular’ mean you’re in denial and/or biased?

no?? what. half of my ships are unpopular as hell... biased toward what even?? how does that make sense omg

19. What is the one thing you hate most about your fandom?

ship wars mostly. people think they can dictate what people can and can’t like

20. What is the purest ship in the fandom?

hunk/lance probably..... anything with hunk is pure as shit tbh

21. What are your thoughts on crack ships?

naah

22. Popular character you hate?

none i love Everyone

23. Unpopular character you love?

MATTHEW HOLT!!!!!!!!

24. Would you recommend XXX to a friend? Why or why not?

yea definitely. i had 0 intent on watching it and im so glad i did lmao

25. How would you end XXX/Would you change the ending of XXX?

nah i think they ended season 2 pretty well. always leavin us on the fuckin edge

26. Most shippable character?

LANCEY LANCE

27. Least shippable character?

uh..... coran. yea