#im kidding op i love you

[ray-beck]

Look, normally I'd just comment in the tags like a normal person, but even asking this question is blatant elder abuse. Micolash would demolish this old man so bad, the Moon Presence would have to intervene and retroactively delete Gehrman from the Bloodborne franchise. Gehrman is a doll fucker freak, but he's well-adjusted and sane compared to AWOOOOO GRANT US EYES boy. If twearking was real in Yarnham, you'd know cage man would be cranking it after he runs away from you every time saying the weirdest shit imaginable. What kind of question even is this are you a cop????

[achieve-the-sun]

Bread hater and his Pokémon

[fluffyartbl0g]

I WAS POSSESSED TO DRAW THIS

[lemon-t4rt]

kobylu modern uni au just because i can…

i apologise but i wanna draw them, if nobody else will then i must step up.

[dykealloy]

it's a good episode.

[mintypsii]

watched usopp's little arc with defeating sugar and wow it took A LOT for him to turn back after running away to fight them again. but then later he finds out that she's awake and thinks about how he'll lose his memories of Luffy if he doesn't take care of her again, and IMMEDIATELY makes up his mind to shoot her from SO FAR AWAY?

[kacievvbbbb]

Some Goth Fam Modern AU headcanons I can't stop thinking about and will probably explode if I don't put pen to paper or in this case- Type to screen

Here we go. This is going to be a long one;

-Shanks isnt officially part of the goth family. Even though he's know these kids since mihawk had them, helped raise them is always there in the morning to take them to school and is practically their other father. Perona and Zoro still refer to him as "Mihawk's bum of a boyfriend" (byprodcut of hearing mihawk call shanks a bum one to many times).

-Zoro and Perona relentlessly troll mihawk for having only 2 friends and they are his boyfriend and business partner. even though perona herself only has like 1 friend and a gaggle of minions.

-Perona got a giant bear cut out all the stuffing and used to make a baby zoro wear the carcass of her destuffed bear. baby zoro was very chill about all this.

-People think mihawk is a housewife but he actually has a job with the government that nobody really knows what it is and nobody is really allowed to talk about. he just never goes in except for the once a month meeting where they threaten to fire him.

-They have a groupchat just the three of them called "The Family" and then another one with shanks sinces hes the one that actually drives them places called "the family and shanks"

-Mihawk is the type of person to get a family portrait every time the kids have grown to look significantly different from the last so every couple of years. They are all extremely giant and actually painted. these are the only family picture hanging on the walls. even tho mihawk secretly scrapbooks all the pictures shanks takes.

-Mihawk has had them since they were toddlers they still call him Mihawk tho. excpet zoro hits 13 and starts exclusively referring to him as Hawkeyes or "that guy".

-Mihawk is a crunchy mom tm and they grew up in an ingredient household. But because mihawk is a grazer at heart and zoro needs fuel like a truck and all their little friends all practically live at their house. Theres awlays charcuterie boards on hand. Zoro never had a pop tart until he went to Luffy's house one time. He asked Mihawk what fruit snacks are and he reacted like zoro just summoned the devil into their home. He's very Nara smith I cook all my kids meals from scratch coded. He's definitely running one of those mommy blogs and being really bitchy and personal attacky about the whole thing and hes not even trying to hide it. Literally two steps away from bring a mommy influencer. literally just needs the instagram page (which he has but doesn't know its run by perona).

-Despite this zoro and perona cant cook for shit. That one tiktok video of the woman showing her husband what she used to have for a midnight snake as a kid in an ingredient house and it was just a bowl of mixed vegetables is so them coded. Despite mihawk's nara smith tendencies once thye get to a certain age every meal but dinner is every man for himself. mihawk only cooks once and so raises a family of girl lunch havers and grazers. Zoro thinks a greenshake is a snack. his eating habits are a source of constant stress for sanji.

-Perona is definitely an influencer her content ranges from fashion stuff to content about her strange family (she tries to get them to make tiktoks and msot of the videos are just zoro's resignantion and mihawk's funnily shutting that shit down with a swiftness) and just stories of her weird family and her brothers even weirder friends. nobody can figure out what their family dynamics are.

-shanks definelty makes those "dealing my italian husband psychic damage videos" except they are like my Spanish-Romanian husband and mihawk get genuinely upset and every video ends witrh the threat of shanks being murdered.

-Nobody on these channels realizes that this mihawk is the same internationally recognized as the best swordfighter to ever live Dracule Mihawk.

-Zoro goes to the local community college with most of the gang while perona goes to a fashion college as a fashion/fashion history major. she lives on campus but is home every weekend tho so mihawk can do her laundry and restock her fridge.

-Only luffy and nami who are his childhood friends truly know just how fucking rich his family is even tho Zoro and the parent that zoro and luffy both weirdly share, despite not being otherwise related, look and act like bums. They meet the rest of the straw hats in college.

-At no given time do shanks or zoro even have 20 dollars on them something that endlessly frustrates everyone else around them. Usopp has bought one to many meals for zoro to be nothing other than incensed when he is invited to "summer" at their lake house thats more like a resort. Zoro can live in a converted mid century castle but Usopp has seen him pay for a sandwhich with a collection of change.

-people often wonder where exactly perona got her bratty attitude from because zoro and mihawk are pretty chill, composed guys. and then they see how mihawk acts around Shanks and the lenghts of childishness Shanks can push him too and then they

-Zoro and Mihawk are endlessly competing at petty meaningless activities espoecially if they involve cutting things with a blade. they have a running count into the 300s off how much mihawk has won vs zoro and he is endlessly smug about it. Zoro has only just begun to start clawing more victories for himself. He recently won their speed cucumber cutting challenge and mihawk was non to pleased about this.

-Adopted this one from a mutual; but Mihawk used to take Perona to all the twighlight, pop girlie, pastel goth stuff and pretends that its all a hastle even tho he's really into the stuff and has been since perona got into it.

-They are the kind of family that always had dinner together but would have every other meal wherever and whenever but since perona is away at college it became sunday lunch and dinner which just turned into sunday bruch for practically the entire neighborhood because zoro and perona keep inviting their weird friends over. and now its a whole thing and mihawk is none to pleased.

-Mihawk was about to be an empty nester and then s-hawk falls in his lap and heres another kid he has to look after and makes sure survives till adulthood 🙄. S-hawk ironically for all he looks exactly like him is the child that acts the least like him (This is largely zoro's influence) And he's definetly that stereotype of when you parents decide to have a kid in their 40s and they grow up in a completely different household than you did. like who even are these people?? S-hawk actually gets to have fruit snacks and zoro is still super salty about this. Because Mihawk was just off achieving his biggest dream with nothing better to do that to pout all his energy into being a parent to these two monsters. but now he has actually has a job that he actively needs to work at🙄

-Zoro looks baby sits s-hawk the most and like s-hawk is like 5 to zoro's 20 and zoro is definitely one of those people that doesnt "play" with kids instead he just folds s-hawk into whatever routine he has for the day without missing a step. He takes him with him to his classes at the community college. He pulls up a chair for s-hawk he has his own little notebook and everything everytime people try to coo at him Zoro tells them to leave him a lone the little dude's trying to learn here. He takes him to the gym like all those videos with dads and their babies repping sets. He gives s-hawk baby dumbells and teaches him proper form and everything. just goes about his life like there isnt a 5 year old trailing him like a duckling. Zoro puts on act for mihawk but he loves having a little buddy since chopper's kind of outgrown it.

-Zoro and Mihawk both talk to baby s-hawk like a regular person. Mihawk talks to him likes he's a distinguished gentleman with thoughts and opinions and who should know better than to fling food and toys and he often reads him the news. Zoro talks to him like he's just a dude definetly the type to have a beer with the baby while they sit on the couch watching sports. Perona and Shanks are the ones that actually treat him like a baby and baby talk him and shanks is definietly one of those parents that's always doing extreme sports stuff with a baby while Perona essentially treats him like a teddy bear / dress up doll. she and mihawk are the only ones allowed to make clothing decisons for him after the time he came home from a shopping trip with zoro and shanks looking like both a bum and a middle aged dad on vacation. Shanks was allowed to keep one tiny s-hawk sized haiwain shirt.

-Zoro essentially raises s-hawk like he's his child 😭. Like Junior and devante from Black-ish but he's less upront about this. He keeps adding things to the kid's schedule without telling Mihawk and essentially treats mihawk like the unwanted third in their relationship. He takes him everywhere with him. People would think that was his kid if he didn't look so intensely like mihawk. He signs baby hawk up for kendo classes from the age like 3 cause he'll be damned if he takes after mihawk's swordsmanship. He attends every practice he gets very intense during matches. its a whole thing. He also keeps signing baby hawk up for random extracurriclars that Mihawk can't keep up with and change depending on season. Baby hawk is in baby gymnastics with all the other seraphim. Zoro is very invested in this. Zoro the type to pull up to a heist with a baby.

[my-thoughts-and-junk]

hate when i see a youtube video that's like 'analyzing why [thing] is bad!' and you watch the video and they just say nothing for twenty minutes

[rahonn]

Im gonna get Kidd Pirates Jolly Roger as a tramp stamp. Will post when it happens

[sheikahwarriork]

Got a prompt for you

Dimileth Post-Timeskip pre-Gronder unplanned pregnancy

(thank you so much anon, i had so much fun writing this!! hope you enjoy it too :3 <3)

wordcount: 1.2k

“Fuck!”

“… Fuck indeed”.

Byleth looked up at Mercedes, biting her lips. “What the fuck am I supposed to do now?!”

Mercedes sighed, visibly worried for her professor. “I think… you should at least tell him, professor. The final choice is entirely yours, of course, but he has to know”. She hesitated. “He needs to know”.

Byleth lowered her gaze. “Sadly, I think you’re right”.

The former mercenary was standing in front of the Cathedral, unable to step inside. She caressed her belly almost unconsciously. ‘You’re not a mistake. I just… I'd rather prefer you not to meet your father when he’s… like that’.

The belly didn’t respond.

Byleth was angry. Furious. She had never felt such rage, not even to Kronya the day Jeralt died. And the worst part? She didn’t even know who exactly this rage was for. Herself? Maybe. Destiny? Not exactly; destiny was Sothis, and Sothis was long gone. Him? Well, yes, of course; but not only. Biology? That one, too. Maybe especially it.

Byleth’s gaze wandered inside the Cathedral, immediately recognizing his figure, standing in front of the old Goddess statue, as he did every single fucking day since they reunited.

Okay, maybe that anger was totally for Dimitri. What did he do, since she woke up, since she found him? Kill, talk to the dead; kill, argue with Byleth; kill; and kiss her. He kissed her. He fucking kissed her. That damn bastard, who once was so afraid of his feelings he even took back his love confession, had the gall to grab her and kiss her like she was water and he was lost in a desert. He kissed her at the worst time possible because she had waited for it for so long, and that wasn’t the right time. She had kissed him back. Byleth missed her Dimitri; missed the sweet prince, missed the caring student, missed her kind friend. She shouldn’t have kissed him back. She should have scolded him, have stepped back. That… that wasn’t her Dimitri. Her lips weren’t for that… not-Dimitri. She should have gone away. She hadn’t, of course, because when Dimitri’s hungry lips captured hers, she felt… desire. Longing. Fire; a burning sensation she thought would kill her instantly. It hadn’t. She indulged in the fire, she lost herself in that fire. She was fire; she had been since the beginning.

Byleth shook her head; it was pointless to think about… that. What is done is done.

She stepped inside the Cathedral; he didn’t turn to her, his shoulders startled slightly, the only sign he noticed her presence.

Oh, the anger was back. Like a tsunami. “Oi, asshole!” Byleth shouted, unable to stop herself. “I have something important to tell you, so at least, look at me”.

Dimitri hesitated for a moment, but apparently something in Byleth’s tone caught his curiosity, since he did turn to her. He just shot her a vague questioning glare.

Byleth sighed. She thought about the advice Mercedes gave her, about what to tell him, how to tell him—

“I’m pregnant”.

It didn’t go exactly as planned.

Dimitri’s eyes widened, the hand holding Areadbhar twitched. He didn’t say anything, just looked at her for forty seconds straight.

“… Who”, he eventually said.

Byleth furrowed. “What?!”

“Who dared touch you”, Dimitri growled, his voice raising in tone.

Byleth blinked a few times. “What the hell do you mean”.

Dimitri was getting closer; he stopped a few inches from Byleth’s face.

“I’ll kill them. I’ll kill whoever dared to touch you, no, whoever dares to even look at you—”

‘Oh… oh heavens, no. He can’t be that dumb, can he?’

“What are you talking about?”

“… The baby’s father, of course”, he hissed, visibly annoyed. “Who is he”. Dimitri looked away, almost as if he was unable to hold her gaze. Almost as if he feared the answer.

‘Oh. He is that dumb’.

“Who do you think he is?” Byleth asked, almost casually. He was going to pay for his dumbness, and she deserved some fun.

Dimitri turned to her, anger in his eyes. “Don’t tease me, you! Tell me who dared touch my—”

“‘Your’ what? Am I yours now?” Byleth interrupted him, folding her arms, holding his gaze.

Dimitri gasped and fell silent. Byleth, still looking him in the eye, grabbed his hand and placed it on her belly.

“This is yours. This— is ours”. ‘You dumbass’, she also thought, but decided to keep it to herself.

Dimitri’s eyes went from their joined hands to her face, looking at her in disbelief.

“Keep in mind—I’m not asking you for help or… or opinions. I don’t need them and don’t care about them. I’m just telling you because you have the right to know—”

Byleth stopped talking when Dimitri suddenly dropped to his knees, their joined hands still placed on Byleth’s belly. It took her a few seconds to notice he was sobbing. Desperately sobbing.

“I’m sorry”, Dimitri was mumbling. “I’m so sorry”.

Yes, Byleth was generally angry with him, but she didn’t hate him. Quite the opposite, in fact. That’s why she yielded and took his face in her hands, looking at him. “Why are you apologizing, Dimitri?” she asked softly.

Dimitri startled, as he did every time Byleth called him by his name. He tried to turn away, but Byleth kept holding him, looking him in the eye. “Answer me”, she demanded.

“I…” Dimitri gasped, searching for words. “Your… child… deserves a better father. A better person. All I know how to do is kill… I have to… They… are telling me this is wrong; I do not have the right—”

“Dimitri”, Byleth interrupted firmly. “A soon-to-be-human is growing inside me. A child will be born. I will be their mother, you will be their father. Now, tell me. Who is more important? The long-gone ones, or the coming ones? Who do you want to dedicate your life to? What, who does your life belong to?”

Dimitri’s eyes were shut, tears along his cheeks. “I… want… it to be yours. Both of you”. His eyes opened. “But, tell me, professor... Please, Byleth, tell me... How do I silence their desperate pleas? How do I... How do I save them? Ever since that day nine years ago... I have lived only to avenge the fallen… How could I be a fitting father for a small creature if I can’t even please those that are already here…”

“Those are not here, Dimitri”, Byleth whispered, her forehead touching his. “But I’m here, and they… they will be soon”, she added, bringing his hand back to her belly. “You just need to choose. Not necessarily now. I’ll… wait for you; I’ll always wait for you.” Her vision was blurred. Was she crying too? ‘I miss you, Dimitri. I miss you so much. Please, don’t leave me alone anymore…’

She would wait until the end of time, if needed, to have a glimpse of her Dimitri back. She knew it, and it hurt. Because she was aware she’d never stop loving him. And, sometimes, to love means to wait. And, often, waiting is painful.

Lost in her tears, she didn’t immediately notice Dimitri’s hands softly caressing her cheeks. When she did, she opened her eyes to meet Dimitri’s resolute gaze. “And I’ll always choose you, my beloved.”

[to-the-all-blue]

Don't mind me I'm just thinking about how - besides with his mom who he barely saw - Sanji was never taught that love is freely given. The people who care for him are people on the other side of a transaction to him; he pays them back in some way. He works on the Orbit, he pays back a debt on the Baratie, he is The Cook on the crew. He gives something so that he can receive care in return. When he wasn't "good enough" as a child he learned that has to be able to provide something to receive the love he always yearned for.

[franeridan]

that one panel when rayleigh meets teach and he's like it might be childish of me but I really hate you so you better run I'm perfectly normal about that panel what are you talking about

[frogbehindthewaterfall]

Let me tell you my problem with the Samadhi Fire.

So we're given a toddler who understandably throws tantrums and is emotional a lot.

Much like any other toddler.

But this really fucking strong fire is thrown into the mix.

Instead of trying to find ways to teach him how to be calm and control his fire better, they try to control him(as said by PIF, even their combined might could not control him) eventually they decide that they should take it away from him

Now remember what Red Son told Mei in the final battle? That she doesn't wield the fire, she IS the fire

Probably talking from experience.

So basically, they locked parts of this kid into rings.

Also the amazing parenting of DBK makes an appearance: he kept one of the rings.

Since he got a mountain on top of him he wasn't around that much, but he didn't know that would happen, so he fully intended to keep a part of his son on his person at all times, as a constant reminder to the kid that yeah that was ripped from him.

And he didn't even get it back???

I love Mei and i fully support her girbossing around, but it would have been such an amazing move towards Red Son's inevitable redemption arc if he was the one to use the Samadhi Fire in the final battle.

(His whole significance in JTTW was because of the Samadhi Fire, so it feels to me like this way of dealing with it was just an excuse to hint toward dragonfruit(which i feel is forced, but i explained that a bit more in another post))

(For some reason, I feel strongly for characters who got things taken from them, or got replaced, or any combination of the two)

(Dunno why)

[wobubling]

men on twitter should stop making theory threads about eustass kid. Not because theres anything wrong with it but they need to stop giving me hope

[urbestestwindgod]

(tw discussion of a myth abt rape n child murder)

the story of tereus, procne, and philomela is a WILD ride bc i was rlly rooting for those ladies like yes! get tereus’ ass!! kill him!! and like woah procne is such a good sister ABD THEN SHE KILLS HER SON ANS FEEDS HIM TO TEREUS AND NEVERMIND I HATE YOU ALL AND ALL THREE OF YOU CAN ROT IN TARTARUS WTF HE WAS LITERALLY JUSTR A LITTLE BOY :( itys GET BEHIND ME. im gonna be honest guys i hate medea for the same reason like yea your myth sucked i feel bad BUT YOU DIDNT HAVE TO KILL YOUR BABIES?? :(

I FELT SO BAD FOR PHILOMELA AND PROCNE…and then she killed her little son…and suddenly…i dont, huh

[llycaons]

this is going to sound so condescending and I don't know if there's a way around it but if you want adult characters you may have to branch out into media that's for adults and I know it can be difficult to get out of your comfort zone and not denying there's still an age bias especially for women but it's really worth it if you're looking for older characters and (presumably) more mature narratives to seek out media that's not designed to be best digested by 13-15 year olds because it's probably going to mostly involve 13-15 yr olds