#im just kinda mentally on the floor now

[illuminatedferret]

.

[lilgynt]

my supervisor straight up yelled at my coworker/us by extension that is not how you should reprimand at all 😭😭

[heetos]

𝐣𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐲?

▌│█║▌║▌║▌│█║

pairing - best friend!sunghoon x afab!reader

wc - 1.4k

synopsis - going out to parties with your mate sunghoon meant you're gonna have the time of your life, but you didn't expect him to show up in the shirt you'd bought for him to be enough to flip your switch.

tw - themes of jealousy, making out, oral (m. receiving), curses, nicknames, lmk if i missed something !

a/n - hiiie ! first work im kinda nervous eekkk. i feel like there's a lot more story than smut idk ? it's literally 4 am i haven't proofread cause im getting dizzy lmaoo. but hopefully you guys like it ! do lmk plss <3

𓈒 ﹒ ☆ 𓂂 ˚ ☆ ꙳ * ࣭ ࣭𓈒 ﹒ ☆ 𓂂 ˚ ☆ ꙳ * ࣭ ࣭

denying you're in love with your best friend has almost become habitual to you. you don't want to ruin your friendship with him, really, but you just can't help it when he wears those sleeveless tops with his arms out. his fashion sense always stood out to you, the way every piece of clothing would wrap around his perfect body made your attraction towards him get deeper. he wasn't just a hot piece of ass, he was genuinely the sweetest guy someone could ask for. you thought you could control your obsession, but when those girls would eye your guy, you'd lose it.

going to parties was always fun for you guys, you guys would talk until some girls huddle around him and make you blurred. you'd get wasted out of your mind, and he'd drive you home. that's your idea of fun. what you never noticed was sunghoon always pushing all the girls aside to find you in the crowd.

tonight would be no different, you'd have to mask your flustered face around him once again, or so you thought.

you arrived at the party a few minutes before him. you sat at near the kitchen talking to your other friends when you felt his presence next to you. you turn your head around, only to see him wearing the shirt you had bought for him. your mouth went agape seeing him effortlessly look stunning under the flashing lights.

"something wrong?" he asks, running his hand through his hair.

"no... uh- uhm- nothing's wrong you look nice i guess.." you look away to the side mentally slapping yourself for losing it.

"you guess? i literally wore this shirt for you im gonna kill you" his eyes trail your face as he lightly slaps your shoulder.

"yeah park i get it, i said you look nice, be happy" you barely let out, processing him wearing it for you.

a group of girls walk upto him, as always, you knew the drill, your time with him was over now.

"hey sunghoon! i love your shirt, it's so sexy! where did you get it?" they blush and laugh right in his face.

sunghoon unexpectedly wraps his arm around your waist. "y/n got it for me. it looks so good right?"

the smile on those girls disappear as they compliment him and drift into the crowd.

you on the other hand, prayed to god he couldn't hear your heartbeat. such a sudden action made you lose your mind. you turn towards him staring at him laugh at the crowd. "what was that for?" you poke him slightly.

"ouch man, excuse me for showing me what my girl got me" he smirks as he looks into your lovesick eyes.

"stop that shut up!" you nudge his shoulder getting up to take a drink.

he instantly puts his arm around your wrist, pulling you back down. "no getting drunk tonight, im not carrying your ass to your 3rd floor room again bro"

you tsked and landed on his lap, eyes widening as your dress rides up higher.

you got upto move but his hands secured around your waist. "isn't this fun?" he whispers in your ear, sending goosebumps down your spine.

you slap his hand away and get up, now matter now badly you wanted to grind on his lap.

he watches you get up with a pout on his lips. "damn you kinda made me hard there" he smirks and runs his fingers through his hair.

heat rushes to your face at that, mind processing all this is real. "huh? made you hard?"

"yeah, well, you make me go crazy all the time. remember that the guy who disappeared right after he asked for your number?"

"holy shit no way" you gasp processing he actually did that.

"like you're driving me crazy right now" his hand trails up your thigh, your breath hitching at his delicate hands touching your sensitive thighs.

you look up and stare into his eyes, the most beautiful eyes you've seen. you gulp, cupping his face pressing a deep kiss to his soft lips.

sunghoon's eyes widen in suprise as he feels your lip gloss coating his lips. his heart races as he kisses you back eagerly.

actions speak more than words seems to have come to life as you both pour your feelings into the kiss.

as the kiss heats up, his hand grips your waist while his tongue prods at your lower lip. you quickly open your lips allowing him to suck your tongue.

your cherry lipstick and lipgloss coat his skin as he puts his hand on yours and trails it to his crotch. you gasp into his mouth feeling him grow under your palm.

he smiles into the kiss, feeling you gasp as you make contact with his clothed dick. he groans softly into your mouth as he pulls away watching you fix your lipstick. "you're so fucking beautiful"

you smile at him admiring his face full of smudges and kisses from your lips. you get up as he watches your tiny hand pull him into a room.

as you guys enter the room, sunghoon locks the door as you quickly tip toe and latch your lips onto his, not wanting to break the kiss for a moment. he smiles into the kiss as you both topple onto the bed.

after making out once again, you pull off breathless, as you watch him caresses your thighs.

"can i blow you?" you let out watching him turn into a mess.

sunghoon's breath hitches as he looks into your eyes watching you get onto your knees under him. "fuck yes" groans, his hand finding your hair. gently guiding your head between his legs.

you pull down his pants, teasingly palming him over his boxers. watching his annoyed look, you pull his boxers down and lick a bold stripe on his tip.

"ah..fuck" sunghoon bites his lip, his hips jerking up off the bed feeling your warm mouth come in contact with his dick.

you spit on his cock as precum dribbles out of his silt, you've wanted to do this for so long, and now you know he wanted it too. you take your hands and wrap it around his cock as you spread his precum all over his dick. feeling him shudder, you take his tip inside your mouth as you keep licking his silt. you fully take him in your mouth as you begin to bob your head up and down.

"fuck baby, that feels so good" sunghoon pants, gripping your hair tightly. "keep doing that.. f-fuck you're so good" he gasps as he feels you take him deeper, his hips bucking up against your mouth.

looking at his reactions, you moan around his length sending a deep vibration to his throbbing cock.

"fuck !" sunghoon moans loudly, his hips thrusting forward as he feels you vibrate his dick and take it him in your throat. his heart pounds in his chest as he feels the pleasure build up inside him. 'k-keep.. fucking. doing that.." he moans at you looking up at him with doe eyes.

you hollow your cheeks, bobbing your head faster as you feel his grip on your hair tighten. wanting to see him cum, you trail your hands down to play with his sensitive balls.

"oh fuck fuck fuck fuck !" he groans, his moments becoming jerky as he loses control.

you pull off feeling him become a mess under you and put his balls in your mouth. you begin to suck them as you stroke him faster.

"fuck !" sunghoon cries out, his fingers digging into the sheets. he gasps, his hips jerking forward as he feels you suck on his balls. "ffuck.. 'm so close.." he says as he feels his orgasm building up inside him.

you speed up your actions, sucking him messily, feeling his balls tighten in your mouth, his tip turns deep red aching to climax.

"ah...! oh god ! " he moans feeling his body tense up in the pleasure. 'fuck...just like that... don't stop!. he grips your hair tightly urging you to not stop. " 'm g-gonna cum..fuckkk !"

with a final cry of your name, sunghoon moans loudly as his cock throbs and releases ropes of hot cum on your tits. he groans, body shuddering with the intense pleasure.

"fuck.." he breathes out, "that was amazing..." his chest heaving as he watches you trying to catch your breath. "you okay love?, you're really fucking good at this"

"you're so damn hot like that" you say as you smile at him, happy to have him this way for you. you get up and press a small kiss to his lips.

"so beautiful babe" he admires your chest spoiled with his cum. "thank you for finally breaking your shell"

"hey! shut up or no head now" you pout at him before decorating his face with kisses again.

he smirks at your actions. "you must be soaking rn"

"you think park?"

end.

[narryffdreaming]

lia and harry's story (four - ii)

summary: harry is a bartender and lia lives right across the street. rating: +18 || warnings: mental health (anxiety) and smut word count: 6,3k

(ONE) | (TWO) | (THREE) | (FOUR - I)

Harry replied after sixty-four slow and agonizing minutes. 

(11:02 pm) Harry: hey babe (11:02 pm) Harry: im downstairs 

(11:02 pm) What? (11:03 pm) Right now?

(11:03 pm) Harry: yeah (11:03 pm) Harry: can you open the door for me?  (11:04 pm) Harry: please?

By the time Lia read the last message, she was already buzzing him in. 

She put her phone aside and opened her apartment door, then stepped outside to wait for him in the hallway. 

She wasn’t expecting to have a face-to-face conversation. At least not so soon. Not right then. She figured they’d text a little before seeing each other, or… 

Well, to be completely honest, she wasn’t so sure what she was expecting would happen. But he had called her babe, so that was a good sign… 

Right?

Lia sighed. The palms of her hands were sweating, and she rubbed them on her thighs, then crossed her arms under her chest.

Things were quiet in her building. Silent. So it was easy to hear him as he made it to her floor. 

And then, when she finally saw him, her heart instantly sped up. He was wearing his usual black pants, a black t-shirt, and a cardigan. On the other hand, he looked tired, not carrying his usual cheerfulness and excitement. His hair disheveled, his jaw all tense. And Lia didn’t like that. 

She really didn’t like that. 

She tightened her arms around her and shuffled on her feet, and Harry lifted his gaze from the steps to her face.

As soon as their eyes met, he curled his mouth into the softest smile, then pulled his curls back and away from his forehead. 

“Hi,” he murmured, gradually shortening the distance between them. 

Lia took a step closer, too, and dropped her arms to her sides. 

“Hi…”

Harry frowned.

He stopped in front of her and took his hands to her face, cradling her cheeks. Lia tilted her chin up and wrapped her fingers around his wrists, meeting his stare. 

“Were you crying?” he asked.

She blinked, flickering her eyes between his.

“Maybe? Kinda?”

“Hmm…” He furrowed his brows a little deeper, and rubbed her cheeks with his thumbs. “What’s ‘kinda crying’ supposed to look like?”

“I think… It’s when you were crying… But you don’t want to admit it?” 

His face softened, and he curved his mouth up. Pulling her face closer, he pressed his lips to her forehead and kissed her gently, then pulled away and searched for her eyes again.

“We need to talk,” he said, “and we will. But what was up with your texts? Did you really think there was a chance I wouldn’t want to see you?”

“I—I don’t know? I mean… I didn’t want to just assume…”

“Why wouldn’t I, tho?”

Lia shrugged. 

“You were mad this morning.”

Harry sighed. “I wasn’t mad, Lee, I was upset… It’s different.”

“Oh…” She brushed her thumbs on his wrists, and nodded. “Well, I mean… Still… I’m sorry… Y’know, for upsetting you.”

“I know. It’s okay. I could’ve handled it better, so I’m sorry, too.”

“You handle everything way better than I do, so…”

Harry chuckled. 

“You give me too much credit.” He pulled her closer, embracing her shoulders into a hug. “And yourself too little.”

She circled his waist with both arms and rested her cheek against his chest, aware that she didn’t have an answer for that and trying to find something else she could say.

Harry beat her to it, though.

“Why were you crying?” 

“I just… I didn’t like how we left things this morning.” 

“Yeah… Me neither. Let’s not do that again, yeah?”

Lia smiled. “Okay.”

“And also,” he said, resting his chin on the top of her head, “I might not always handle things very well in the moment, but I don’t want you to feel like we can’t talk about things, ok? I would never just… Disappear. Or anything like that.”

Lia nodded, and sighed. 

“Yeah, I… I know, I know. I freaked out but… Yeah, you’re right. I know you wouldn’t.”

Harry pulled away from their hug with a smile on his face. 

“Good. And please don’t ever be so formal with me again because that freaked the shit out of me.”

“Yeah…” Lia laughed. “It felt weird after I sent them.”

“I’m glad you did, though. I’m glad you reached out.”

“Me too.” 

“Now,” he said, once again cradling her cheeks and taking a step forward, carefully guiding her inside. “I gotta go back to the bar, but can we meet tomorrow to talk?”

Lia nodded, following his movements and walking backwards while still holding onto his waist. “Yeah, of course.”

“Ok. And can I kiss you a little before I go?” he asked, already leaning down and brushing his lips with hers. “Have something to think about while I miss you in the middle of the night?”

Lia nodded again, breathing him in.

“Good.” He stopped walking, and lifted his foot to kick the door closed. “C’mere, then.”

Lia wasn’t the jealous type of girl. 

Insecure? Sure. 

Jealous? No. 

At least she didn’t think she was. During the five years dating Cole, she’d never worried about— 

Okay, maybe her last boyfriend wasn’t the best example. 

And maybe thinking about him wasn’t a smart move. 

She couldn’t help it, though. At the end of the day, Cole wasn’t just her last boyfriend — he was the only boyfriend she’d ever had. And a pretty serious one. 

The only long-term relationship she had experienced, and therefore the only one she could base herself on. 

So, yes, she shouldn’t think about him, but thanks to everything that she had gone through with Cole, Lia knew she wasn’t jealous. 

She was insecure, but not jealous. 

She just wasn’t. 

Not until the next Friday night, at least, when she was walking back home from the grocery store and saw Harry outside the bar talking to someone. 

Talking to a girl. 

And the world around her simply… Stopped. In a different way. In a new way. 

In a worried, scared way.

Mostly because things between her and Harry were still weird after that Tuesday morning. 

They’d talked, yes, and they’d made up, yes, but things were still… Weird. Probably because none of them had mentioned the elephant in the room — which meant they had talked about how Lia hadn’t accepted Harry’s offer to drive her to work and how it’d hurt his feelings, but they hadn’t talked about the fact that Lia hadn’t accepted any offer about anything yet. 

Including going to the bar.

Which she still hadn’t done it.

Lia still hadn’t gone to the bar. 

Even though he’d invited her. 

Multiple times. 

And then it was Friday night and there he was, leaning against the wall of the bar, wearing his usual black pants, black t-shirt, and black cardigan. Arms crossed while looking at his feet.

And next to him, there was a girl. A girl that kept moving her hands while talking excitedly to him. Her clothes reminded Lia of things Jillie would wear back when they were in college — a golden slinky top with a (very) low front cut, paired with a tight leather skirt and black heels. 

Lia couldn’t imagine herself wearing anything even slightly similar to that, and it didn’t seem to match the cold weather at all, but the girl was dressed in what many would consider a perfect outfit for a Friday night out. And, to be honest, she looked pretty. Really pretty.

Prettier than Lia had ever looked. Or felt.

And it occurred to her, right then and there, how she’d never worried about losing Harry to someone he could meet at The Wandering Triplet. She’d been so focused on protecting what they had inside their little and private bubble, that she hadn’t thought about girls he could meet while spending time at work. Girls who could be funnier than her, prettier than her, more confident than her. Girls who would keep him company at the bar, and wouldn’t give a single damn about who would see them together or not. Girls who wouldn’t wait for an invitation to be on their way to see him. To be with him.

Girls like the one across the street, or like the woman she’d seen with him so long ago. 

Girls who were nothing like her.

Why was Harry even wasting his time with her?! 

“Lia, hey!”

Lia jolted, stopping on her track. 

Of course he’d call her name. 

Of course he would make her feel seen, and prove her paranoid thoughts all wrong. 

Again.

Taking a deep breath in, she shook her head briefly, then focused her sight on him. 

Harry watched her with a smile on his face, arms dropped by his side. 

And Lia’s mouth twitched. 

Damn. 

The girl next to him faced Lia as well, but Lia tried not to look at her. She didn’t want to freak out. Feeling nervous because of Harry was already too much, she didn’t need to add any other insecurities on top of it and make herself feel even worse.

“Hii,” Harry said.  

“Hey.” Lia waved — yes, she waved. Because, well, what else was she supposed to do? Was she supposed to walk to him? Cross the street? Keep walking and go home?

Harry opened his arms and wiggled his fingers — giving her the answer she was looking for without even hearing the question.

“Come here!”

She tightened the grip of her fingers around the single grocery bag and nodded, then walked towards them — towards him. Aware that each step she took, each thump of her heart got louder and heavier inside her chest. And that the closer she got, the higher it raised to her throat. 

Things only calmed down when she reached the sidewalk and Harry smiled even wider, then embraced her shoulders in a warm hug. 

“Hiii babe,” he said. 

Lia accepted it with a quiet sigh, timidly circling his waist with her free arm. “Hi…”

Harry pulled away, but kept his arms around her neck and their bodies close together.

“Where were you?” He dipped his chin down and looked inside of her eyes, curling his lips into such an affectionate smile that it caused her belly to flutter. Damn you, Harry. “Went over to yours just minutes ago.”

“Oh.” She smiled, too, not able to hold it back. It was easy to forget the rest of the world when it was only the two of them. “I just went to get some pizzas for later. And ice cream.”

“Hmm.” He leaned his back completely against the wall, pulling her along with him. “What pizza did you get?”

Lia chuckled through her nose. “I got pepperoni for you, don’t worry.”

Harry’s smile grew wider. “Did you, huh?”

Standing between his feet, she tilted her chin up. “Yeah. It’s your favorite, isn’t it?”

“I guess it is.”

He chuckled lightly, and the happiness that radiated off him — through his eyes, through the wrinkles around them, through his grin and his dimples — brought happiness to her own chest. 

He was too good to be true. 

Definitely wayyyy too good to be true.

Next to them, the girl cleared her throat, and the sound brought Lia back to earth. She looked down to Harry’s throat, hoping he didn’t notice how her insides shriveled. 

Or maybe hoping he did. 

Either way, the only one who moved to look at the girl was him. 

“What?” he deadpanned. 

“I’m going back inside,” the girl said. 

“Ok?”

“I just… Thought I’d let you know.”

“Why? I didn’t ask.”

Damn, Harry.

Lia widened her eyes and looked up at him. 

He was frowning at the girl, and his rude attitude took Lia’s mind back in time, not too long ago, when she could only dream about being part of his life. 

The caring and affectionate version of Harry was one she didn’t get to experience until they actually got to know each other, and she had somehow forgotten how he used to close himself and be a completely different person unless he was around people he seemed to want to be around. Or around people he wanted to be nice to. Or something along those lines. 

And although Lia had many times wondered why he’d changed so suddenly with her, the truth is that she hadn’t seen that old version of Harry since the night she’d freaked out on him. And she also had never questioned him too much about it. 

Or maybe at all.

“Jesus Christ,” Harry breathed out, then pressed his forehead against hers. “She just wouldn’t stop talking.”

Lia dropped her shoulders and licked her lips. She hadn’t paid attention to the moment the girl had left, but she definitely wasn’t there anymore.

“Do you know her?”

“Fuck no.” He chuckled, humorlessly. “I don’t know why she decided to stay here.”

Lia snorted. “C’mon. You really don’t know why?”

“I mean… I certainly didn’t give her a reason to. I wasn’t even talking to her.”

“Hmm…” Pulling her head back, she took her free hand to the side of his face, reaching his ear and rearranging a few of his curls. His hair kept getting longer and longer, and she was loving it. “Why didn’t you go inside, then?”

“‘Cause I was waiting for you.”

“Really?”

“Yeah… Why do you sound so surprised?” He chuckled, tightening his arms around her neck and shrugging. “I’m on my break, told ya I went to see you and you weren’t home, so I waited for a bit.”

“That’s… Thank you, Harry.”

“C’mon, don’t thank me for that.” He brushed the tip of his nose with hers, from one side to the other, then up and down. Lia fluttered her eyes shut, and then, lowering his voice to a whisper, Harry asked, “Can I kiss you?”

Lia licked her lips, and nodded. 

He leaned in, then, pressing their mouths together in a short and soft kiss. 

A kiss that tasted like simplicity. Like easiness. Like home. 

A kiss that had her sighing into his mouth, and him squeezing her into his arms.

And a kiss that, when he finally pulled away, had her threading her fingers on the back of his head and smiling at him. 

“You taste salty,” she murmured.

Harry chuckled. “Thank you? Sorry? ‘M not sure what you meant by that.”

“Definitely a thank you.” She smiled. “Can I have another one?”

“As many as you want.”

Their next kiss was longer, but somehow even softer. As if they had all the time in the world, and nowhere else to be. Nowhere else to go.

After a while, though, and after a couple more kisses, Harry pulled away again, pecking her mouth one last time before resting his forehead against hers. 

“I swear I don’t want to go,” he said, then licked his swollen, just kissed and nibbled lips. “But I’m sure my break ended like… Ten minutes ago.”

She chuckled. “That’s—”

“Twenty, actually.” A male’s voice interrupted, startling both of them. 

Lia took a step back and looked to her side, finding the bouncer on his usual spot — sitting on a stool, by the front door of the bar, and scrolling through his phone.

Had he been there the entire time? 

With a chuckle, Harry took a step back from the wall, forcing Lia to take another step back, too.

“I’ll see you in a couple of hours,” Harry said.

“Mhm. Sure.”

That had been their first public interaction, hadn’t it? 

And she hadn’t even realized. Everything had happened so naturally, that she hadn’t even worried about who could be around them. Or who could see them, or who could— 

“Babe.” Harry squeezed her arms. “Look at me.”

“Hm?”

Lia faced him, and Harry furrowed his brows. 

“Don’t worry about him, ok? He won’t say a word about us. He sees me walking over to your place almost everyday now, so it’s not actually news for him, yeah?”

She swallowed, and nodded. 

“Yeah? Alright?”

“Yeah.” She nodded again. “Okay.”

How did he know she was so scared of people saying something? 

Did he know she was terrified of messing it up in front of other people? 

Did he know she was terrified of embarrassing him in front of other people? 

Did he know she was terrified of other people pointing out to him how socially awkward she was? 

Did he know she was painfully convinced people would think he could do better than her? 

Did he know she was painfully convinced people would laugh at him for being with her?

Was Harry actually that good at reading her mind? To the point where she didn’t need to tell him anything, that he would always get her?

Because it surely seemed he was.

It surely felt like he was. 

“Aren’t you going to answer that?” Harry asked.

Sitting on the floor and leaning her back against the couch, Lia shook her head. 

“It’s just Molly. I’ll call her later.”

“It’s the third time she’s calling you,” he said from above her, still braiding her hair — or, well, still trying to braid her hair, because they’d been there for half an hour already, and he had started over at least four times. “What if it’s something important?”

It wasn’t. 

Lia knew it wasn’t. 

“It’s not. Don’t worry about it.”

The phone stopped ringing, but only for a second, and then Molly was calling again. 

“Ok. That’s it. You gotta answer your friend.” He held her hair with one hand, and with the other reached for her phone on the coffee table. “I can go to your room and give you some privacy if you want to, but please just answer.”

With a sigh and a groan, Lia grabbed her phone from his hand. Molly’s name flashed on the screen, and her chest tightened. She really didn’t want to face whatever it was that her best friend had to say — because she knew that no matter what it was, she was for sure about to be lectured. 

“Want me to leave?” Harry asked, just as she was answering the call and taking the phone to her ear. 

She turned her head, and tilted her chin up.

“Hey Mols.”

Stay, she mouthed.

Harry nodded, and Lia faced forward, letting him resume with his task while she handled the consequences of ignoring her best friends for the last three weeks. 

“Oh my God! Fucking finally, Lia Lane!”

Lia chuckled. 

“Hiii, I know, I’m sorry… What’s up? How are you?”

“What do you mean ‘what’s up?’ Are you kidding me? You haven’t been answering our texts, and you didn’t come to Jillie’s the other night… I’m worried, y’know?”

Lia looked down to her lap, finding a loose thread on her shorts to fidget with. 

“I know… I’m sorry. Didn’t mean to ignore you guys.” Actually, she did mean to ignore them, but she couldn’t fully explain herself while sitting in between Harry’s legs, and a half-explanation would only make things worse. Hopefully, at some point she would be able to tell them about what was truly going on.

“Yeah well, I also miss you, okay? It sucks to be ignored by your best friend.”

“Again, I’m sorry. I miss you guys too... How are you?”

“I’m good, yeah. Things are good.”

“Okay… I’m glad to hear that.”

“Yeah.” Molly cleared her throat. “I… Look, I met someone.”

Lia widened her eyes. “Really?”

“Yeah… She’s… She’s great. And I wanted to tell you and Jillie about it, okay? You know you’re like, the only family I can introduce her to, so… I mean, that’s why I wanted us to meet the other night… And it just… It sucks that you didn’t show up.”

Harry’s fingers tickled her skin, and Lia pulled forward. She bit her lip to hold back her laughter, then patted Harry’s shin, ignoring his own chuckle and rolling her eyes at him. He shushed her and took his free hand to push her back against the couch, then went back to braiding her hair. 

“Lia? Are you there?”

“Hi, yeah, sorry! I’m here. Again, I’m sorry I missed dinner at Jillie’s. I shouldn’t have.”

“Yeah, it’s whatever… Are you okay, tho? Is everything okay?”

“Mhm, yeah. I just… I’ve been busy.”

“Busy doing what?”

“Y’know…” Lia shrugged. “Just… Stuff. Nothing important. Can we meet this week?”

“Sure… Are you sure everything’s okay tho?”

“Yes, Molly! I'm fine! Don’t worry… I’ve just been busy with work and you know… Outch!” She winced, Harry’s ring getting caught in her hair. He murmured an apology, and tried to untangle the mess as she kept going. “You know how I get sometimes with my anxiety… So I’ve been taking some time to myself, that’s all. But I’m good, I promise.”

“Mm. So… No news?”

“No Mols, no news,” Lia chuckled. “Everything’s the same here.”

Lifting his leg, Harry moved to get around her, then got up from the couch. 

Lia bit her lip as she watched him walk to the kitchen, then to the fridge, finally disappearing behind the open door.

“Lia?” Molly called. 

She blinked.

“Sorry, what?”

“Nevermind… We can talk another time, I can tell you’re busy.”

“I’m not! I’m just… Shit. Sorry I’m so distracted. I’m watching a movie, that’s all. Let’s meet this week, yeah? Maybe get some coffee, or dinner. We can call Jillie, too.”

“Sure. Let’s do that. But please show up, okay? And answer our calls.” 

“I promise I will.”

“Okay… Bye Lia, love ya.”

“Bye Mols, love—”

“You’ll let me know if you need anything, right?”

Lia sighed. She closed her eyes for a second, then stared down at her stretched her legs. “I’m fine, Molly.”

“I know, I know… It’s just… You’ll let me know if you’re not, right?”

“Of course.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

“Okay then. Love ya.”

“Love you too, Mols.”

When Lia hung up, she took her phone to her lap and stared at it for a moment. Worrying her friends was the last thing she wanted to do, but she had been so busy and distracted with Harry that she hadn’t been able to balance everything at the same time anymore. She didn’t spend as much time alone as she used to, so she had to reorganize her routine. She couldn’t afford not focusing on her job, and she still had an apartment to take care of, and a family to talk to. So, yes, she’d put her friends aside for a while. Not because she didn’t love them, and not forever, of course. It was just a break she needed until she figured a way to keep up with everything in a healthy and not overwhelming way. 

Still, it sucked that she wasn’t there for them. Lia needed, somehow, to find a way to balance things again. To be there for her friends, like they’d been there for her before. So many times. She needed to— 

“Hey,” Harry said, standing next to the couch.

Lia turned her head, and looked up. 

“Heyy… You didn’t finish my braid?”

“Hm, no, sorry.” He cleared his throat. “Was getting my rings caught there and I couldn’t get it right, so I gave up.”

“Oh, okay.” She nodded, smiling at him as she dropped her head back and rested it on the couch. “Do you still wanna watch a movie?”

“Actually, I was thinking I’d go back to mine.”

“What? Why?” She sat upright and turned her body fully to the side, facing him from the floor. “You’re not shaving again, are you?”

Harry chuckled, rubbing his hand on his chin and scratching his jaw.

“No, not yet, don’t worry. I just… Y’know, need to change my clothes, water my plants… That stuff. Haven’t been there since yesterday morning.”

“Oh. Sure, yeah. Of course.”

She didn’t want him to leave — she really didn’t want him to leave. But they had already spent a lot of time together, so she shouldn’t pressure him on staying any longer than he wanted to. Right? 

Besides, she’d just been thinking about how much she needed to balance things out again, so maybe some time by herself would be good for her. For them. And even for her friends. Right?

Maybe it was a step to move things forward. 

Right?

Lia couldn’t remember how long it had been since the last time she’d been at the bar. And, truth be told, she still didn’t feel like going. She really didn’t. 

She still had hundreds of questions and insecurities about it. She was still terrified of entering Harry’s workplace and seeing him surrounded by so many people. By his coworkers. By other girls. What was she supposed to do around him? Was she supposed to talk to him? Was she supposed to hug him? To kiss him? 

Would he act differently with her now?

He would, right?

Of course he would. 

But what if he wouldn’t?

What if he went back to being rude to her?

It got to a point where staying inside and thinking so much about it became unhealthy. Where all the scenarios she created inside her mind were getting in the way of her living her normal life and doing the smallest tasks, like having dinner, or reading a book. And then it got even worse — when she couldn’t even focus on planning her next classes without having an intrusive thought about the whole thing.

Which was why, on that Saturday night, Lia decided to just go. 

Without thinking again, and without wasting any more time. That way she wouldn’t change her mind. She would just go to The Wandering Triplet and say hi. Simple like that.

And that’s what she did. 

When she arrived, the bouncer smiled and greeted her with the same excitement as always — although he also started by asking if she wanted him to get Harry for her. He’ll be happy to see you, he said after she announced she would actually get inside to say hi. And Lia felt the excitement of a teenager, so it wasn’t a surprise when she walked through the door with a glowy smile on her face.

Inside, people were laughing, chatting, and drinking. Filling the entire place. An acoustic guitar played softly in the background, and a gentle male voice sang a popular song. Despite the big crowd, the atmosphere felt cozy, and joyful. Happy. 

Seeing the place so alive and full made her chest tighten, knowing there was a high chance it suddenly wouldn’t exist anymore. 

Distracted with her thoughts for a couple of seconds, Lia had time to take a deep breath before glancing where she actually wanted her focus to be. There were so many people around the bar that she didn’t see anyone behind it until she stood close enough to lean her elbows on top of the wood. And then, she found them. All of them — Sage, Rohan, and, of course, Harry.

She smiled, then bit her lip.

Unfortunately, he stood too far away for her to call his name without getting everyone else’s attention, so she took a moment to watch him quietly. Secretly. His perfectly messy curls, his facial hair. Black pants, black t-shirt. Mixing drinks, focused on doing his job. Casual. Soft. Hot. 

And all ready to spend the night with her. 

Her heart skipped a beat, and she couldn’t help her smile from getting bigger. There was nothing new about watching him behind the counter, and yet everything was suddenly different. They were different. 

Lia didn’t have to wonder about how it would be to kiss him anymore, about how it would feel to be wrapped inside his arms, or how his voice would sound in the mornings. She didn’t have to fantasize about being touched by his incredible hands, or about tracing his many random tattoos, or about his facial hair scratching her skin.

She didn’t have to wonder anymore, because she was living all of it. 

And even more than all of it.

In front of her, someone cleared their throat, and Lia blinked. 

“So…” Sage watched her with a smirk, arms crossed over her chest and a towel on her shoulder. “Should I get your order, or should I call the reason behind that smile to get it for you?”

“W—what?”

“Lia!” Rohan cheered from the opposite side. A loud exclamation of her name that got everyone’s attention. Hers, Sage’s, and, most importantly, Harry’s. “You’re back!”

Rohan opened his arms and grinned, turning towards where she and Sage stood. 

Harry whipped his head to follow Rohan’s line of sight, quickly meeting her stare. He widened his eyes and smiled, glancing briefly at the drinks in front of him before glancing back at her. 

“Oh I know he’s just dying to come over right now.” Sage laughed. “He’s just got this super annoying group of people waiting for drinks tho.”

Lia nodded, unable to look away from Harry. 

Hi babe, he mouthed. 

If possible, her smile got even wider. 

“I’m Sage, by the way. ‘M not sure if we’ve been properly introduced before.”

That got her attention, and Lia finally darted her eyes away from him. 

“Sorry, I don’t think we have, no. I’m Lia.”

“Oh, I know who you—” 

“Look at you!” Stopping next to Sage, Rohan threw one arm around his coworker, but his stare never faltered from Lia’s face. “You’re alive!”

Lia blinked a couple of times, and nodded.

“Um, yeah,” she said, holding the most stupid smile on her face while darting her sight from him to over his shoulder, where she could see Harry staring at her. “I am, yeah… It’s been, um… It’s been a while, huh?”

“A long while, yeah.” Rohan chuckled. “You can’t go missing like that. This place is not the same without my favorite customer around.” 

Sage snorted, pushing his arm away. “Okay, Casanova. First, you’re making me nauseous. Two, you can’t just assume people want you to flirt with them.”

Rohan chuckled and mumbled something Lia couldn’t hear, nor wanted to hear. Behind him, Harry focused back on his drinks, then back on her, then back on his drinks. And Lia tapped her foot on the floor, wanting nothing more than for him to be done and walk up to her. 

In front of her, Sage cackled, and Lia blinked. 

“Whatever,” Sage said, shaking her head and focusing back on Lia. “I’m gonna see if Harry needs any help. Maybe I can speed things up a little.” 

Sage winked, then turned around and walked away. 

Lia glanced back at Harry, holding his stare until Sage said something that got all of his attention. He broke eye-contact, then, but kept smiling, shrugging and going back to the drinks in front of him while Sage involved herself as well.

“He probably does need all the help,” Rohan said with a chuckle. “Girls go crazy with him. He’s always the busiest. Anywho, how are you? Huh? What have you been up to?”

Lia sighed. Of course she understood that Harry couldn’t leave everything just to talk to her. She wasn’t expecting him to do so. After all, it was his job. However, as Rohan waited for answers to questions she couldn’t even pay attention to, she kind of wished he had. 

It was obvious she wasn’t there to talk to Rohan, and that it wasn’t him the one she wanted to be there with. If Sage had noticed already, why couldn’t he notice it, too?

“Lia?”

“What, Rohan? What?!”

Rohan flinched back, and Lia widened her eyes, turning to him so fast her neck snapped. She winced, then pressed her hand on top of her throbbing muscle. 

“Oh my—Oh my God, I’m so sorry! I’m—I didn’t mean to be rude, I was just— I— I had a long day, and... It’s too crowded here and… I’m really sorry!”

Shit. 

She was lying about having a long day, but not about everything else. It was crowded there. And she didn’t mean to be rude. 

In fact, she didn’t even want to be rude. 

She hated being rude.

She’d been just thinking too much, too nervous about everything. Wishing that Rohan would, at least, notice she wasn’t even looking at him, y’know? Wishing he would stop talking for a little bit. That’s all. But she didn’t mean to snap at him. Especially when he had been nothing but welcoming and nice to her.

God. She hated being rude to people.

“It’s fine.” Rohan rested his hand on her arm, squeezing gently as he offered a soft smile. He loosened the grip, and then moved it away. “Don’t worry about it. Are you okay tho? Do you need anything?”

Lia sighed and shook her head. 

See? Rohan wasn’t a bad person. He had been so sweet to her from the beginning. She shouldn’t just snap at him out of nowhere. That wasn’t nice of her. And it wasn’t fair to him. She could be better than that.

She was better than that.

“I am okay, thanks. But I’m really sorry. I really am.”

“Like I said, don’t worry. Just forget about it.” He waved her off, and she smiled. “Let me get you a drink tho, yeah? On the house.”

“Oh, no, please no.” She shook her head, but made sure to chuckle, keeping everything as light as possible. “No need to, really.”

“I insist. C’mon, what do you want? Or… What if I surprise you with something different tonight, huh?”

“Rohan, it’s fine, really.”

“Lia.” He lifted his eyebrows, as if trying to prove a point. “You’re here to drink something, aren’t you? Even if it’s just water. And it’s my job to get your drink. So let me get it for you.”

“Ugh.” She threw her head back and smiled, both in amusement and annoyance. After a second, she looked back at him and sighed, then rested both forearms on the counter and linked her hands together. “A mojito will be fine, then, thanks.”

“Oh c’mon!” Rohan chuckled. “Aren’t you bored of mojitos already?”

Lia was about to laugh and say something when Rohan hunched down and placed his own forearms on the counter. With a smirk, he caged her arms in between his, then got way closer to her face than he needed to be. Or that he had ever been before. 

And then, for the first time since she’d met him, Rohan made Lia uncomfortable. 

Really uncomfortable.

Inside her chest, her heartbeat sped up. 

“Let me get you something else, huh?”

“N—no, it’s just…” She shook her head. “It’s fine… I mean, I— Well, it’s my… My favorite drink, actually, so…”

He chuckled, placing his fingers around her wrist and squeezing before straightening his back up again. “You’re cute.”

She closed her eyes for just a second, letting the air she was holding out through her nose and dropping her shoulders. 

Oblivious to her reactions, Rohan took a step back, smiling and pointing his index finger at her. “One mojito for my favorite customer, then!”

“I got it,” Harry said, placing a hand on Rohan’s shoulder whilst looking at her.

Lia stood up again, her jaw clenching as she swallowed. 

Harry didn’t look happy. 

Harry also didn’t sound happy. 

At all.

“You?” Rohan turned around, laughing. “Why?” 

“Because.”

“Oh c’mon. It’s Lia, man. I’ll make it.”

“Exactly.” Harry crossed his arms on his chest and tilted his chin up. “Lia prefers my mojitos, so I got it. You can go now.”

Rohan said something, and Harry looked back at him, then back at her. With pulled eyebrows, set jaw, and pursed lips. That angry, bitter expression she had put behind and forgotten about.

As they talked, Lia closed her hands into fists, then swallowed. 

The thud of her heart echoed heavily in her chest, and her lungs suddenly couldn’t hold any oxygen inside them. 

And then, Harry tilted her chin towards her. 

“Why don’t we ask her, then?”

Lia widened her eyes.

What…

What was he doing?

“Hey Lia, don’t you think my mojitos are better than Rohan’s?”

.

.

.

“Aren’t they your favorites?”

She opened her mouth, and closed it again.

Blank. 

Her mind went blank.

“Oh c’mon, weren’t you just chatting with him till now? Laughing with him? What’s gotten to you now? Huh? Cat got your tongue?”

“Dude, what the hell?” Rohan placed a hand on his chest, taking a step to the side and standing in front of him. 

Lia looked down at the counter, then took a step back.

“What’s gotten into you? You’re taking it too far.”

“I just asked her a question. She can answer, can’t she?”

“You’re making her uncomfortable, man.”

“Oh.” Harry scoffed. “So I’m the one making her uncomfortable now?”

“Look at her. Of course she’s uncomfortable. Back off, ok?”

There was a pause as Lia blew out multiple short breaths to pull herself together. Music was still playing, people were still chatting, but everything went silent for her. 

Her chest was too tight. She still couldn’t think. 

She wanted Harry to make her feel better, but Harry had just made her feel worse.

Harry.

Fuck.

She took one hand up to her cheek, wiping the tears she hadn’t even noticed before.

“Lia…” 

Shit. 

His voice… 

He was just… 

“Just leave her alone, man. I got her. Why don’t you…”

A buzz rang inside her ears as their voices faded away. 

She couldn’t breathe. 

She needed to get out of there. 

Lia turned around, grasping her bag tightly between her fingers and squeezing her way into the crowd. 

She needed to get out of there. 

She needed to get out of there. 

She needed to get out of there. 

Voices were muffled as they reached her ears. She couldn’t see, nor hear anyone. 

All she could do was move forward. 

Move her legs. Cross the street. 

And go back to her place.

Get away from everything.

Get away from everyone.

Get away from him.

[scorpioracha]

Dating Yoongi

We've finally got the dating Yoongi headcanons!! I'm sorry it took so long but boy is it lengthy so strap in. this is not proofread and im fucking exhausted so edits to be done eventually. if you enjoy reblog, like and leave a comment. cw: does contain smut and one kys moment

Your meet cute with Yoongi ended up being more of a meet awkward than anything. It was 3am at one of the many random convenience stores in Gangnam and you were exhausted, exhausted and hungry. You were doing a year in Seoul for your major and the timezones were really fucking you up. Puffy sleepy eyes,glasses on and a sleep mask resting on your forehead made quite the picture.

It was also quite the picture when you ran into a rack of honey butter chips and wiped out on the floor.

Full wipeout.

Legs up,gravity turned on its head wiped out.

Thankfully the only thing wounded was your pride, but you kinda wished you knocked yourself out so you couldn’t see the handsome man towering over laughing so hard his eyes practically disappeared and a gummy smile on his face. He had a cup of ice and one of those americano packets balanced in one hand and a helmet dangling in his other.

“...chana?”

“Huh?”you said in a daze. 

“Gwaenchana?”he purred in a low rumble. He looked at your lost expression and sucked in a breath.

“Are you okay?”It was a little clunky and half mumbled but you didn’t want to put this man through any more mental torment so you nodded quickly.

“Ne, na gwaenchana!”you replied and quickly scrambled to your feet, almost falling once again because your ankle decided now was the time to roll. He quickly reached out and steadied you, looking at you with so much bewilderment the whole situation felt comical. He looked at the hand that still rested on your arm and quickly pulled it away, you swear you saw his pale cheeks turn pink.

“Um…”he rumbled, looking at you with weary eyes. “stay”

You nodded with wide eyes as you watched this random man run around the convenience store and come back with a juice box and a random red pouch. He looked at you and held up each one.

“Bae juice”

He held up the red pouch. “Hong sam jelly for sukchwi…one moment”

He pulled out his phone and typed quickly. He held the phone to his ear and hummed.

“For hangover”he said, pointing to the two items again. Your eyes widened and you shook your head rapidly. You weren’t drunk. He definitely misinterpreted the situation and just smiled, giving you a smile and waving goodbye before disappearing into the night.

And what do you do when a pretty man buys you pear juice and ginseng jelly in a foreign country?

You fucking c o n s u m e it.

And the next morning when you woke up late to your 8:00am lecture, you just blamed the crazy night because wow what the fuck happened.

You spent the rest of your classes thinking about that handsome stranger. Maybe you did hit your head because WHY didn’t you ask for his name or his katalk? You could have done the whole ‘oh handsome young man, I need to pay you back’ kinda schtick but your brain decided to cosplay the very first windows computer and blue screen the minute you looked at him. stupid.

“Stupid” you groaned, trudging back to your dorm. You had been blessed—got accommodations—for a single room so it was just you and your twin sized 

Oh yeah, and your pining. 

Couldn’t forget about your pining.

You needed a drink. A good drink,some good food and some cartoons to get your mind off this random man. Within minutes you had a bottle of soju and a hefty platter of tteokbokki on the way. Maybe you’d go out for bingsu sometime this week with the girls from your lecture. They were sweet and treated you just like anyone else despite the racial and cultural differences, doting on you as their new maknae and always making sure you ate between classes. It was nice to be looked out for so thoroughly, especially when you were so far away from home. You pulled your phone out to text them when you got a notification that your delivery driver was already on the way.

Huh. they were already earning themself a tip. You stood eagerly by the door waiting and even though you were watching the app like a hawk, you jumped when the doorbell rang and scrambled to open it.

“Gamsahab-”you looked up and saw a familiar set of eyes. “...-nida”

“Soju?”he raises his brow in a way that says ‘again?’. You felt your face grow hot and shook your head rapidly. He just smirked and handed over your takeout bags.

Once again you fucked up,blanked and forgot to ask for his name.

 Damn pretty boy with his pretty eyes and his stupid smile.

It was months before you had seen him again. 

Time heals all wounds and you began to move on. You hung out more with your friends, went to karaoke,saw the sights of Seoul and slowly but surely felt yourself moving on.

It was on a rainy day in May where you found yourself at your usual convenience store. The weather went from sunny skies to torrential downpour within minutes and you had just gotten your hair done. You were looking for an umbrella but found yourself in the snack aisle. 

Blame it on the wind.

What you didn’t expect to find in the snack aisle were seven men bickering. 

You kinda just stood like 🧍🏾‍♀️ until one of them finally turned and god he was stunning 

“Yah, Yoongi-yah!! Move and let this lady through!”

The ‘Yoongi’ in question quickly scooted out of the way, mumbling about how they were all in the way. 

That mumble…

“Yoongi..”you whispered before you could even stop yourself. His gaze snapped up and for once you caught him off guard. His eyes flitted over you rapidly and his mouth opened and shut like a nutcracker.

“Soju girl,”he whispered. Then the moment was lost.

"na iroumi aniya(that’s not my name)” you huffed in annoyance. You know there was an honorific you were supposed to use somewhere in that sentence but your point still stood.

“You speak Korean”another boy said and god he was tall.

“Yes I speak Korean”you said, tilting your head up at him.

“Hyung, you said soju girl couldn’t speak Korean!”a voice laughs. You squint your eyes at this Yoongi who seemingly wanted the floor to swallow him whole. He stared at you like he had seen a ghost actually which wasn’t making things much better. The tall boy sighed and took a step forward, bowing even. 

“I apologize for my hyung,”he said solemnly. “He’s usually not this dumb. I’m Kim Namjoon and these are my bandmates. What’s your name?”

You smiled and returned the bow, happy to finally have some familiarity, both language and warmth.

“I’m y/n”you said. “I think me and your hyung have some catching up to do”

Yes, to say it was a meet awkward was the nicest way to put it.

It was a fucking train wreck of events if you were being completely honest.

You had exchanged info with Namjoon seeing as he spoke the most English and was the only one who didn’t 👁️👄👁️ at you which was nice and had quickly become good friends with one another.

Seeing that their leader liked you, the rest of the boys quickly followed suit and you suddenly had a much bigger friend group than you could even imagine.

Yoongi had become a lot more reserved in a way that was off putting to say the least. You’d only ever spoken to him twice before but there was something off.

you’d asked Namjoon about it during one of your study/music/kill each other from frustration sections and he just shrugged mumbling something about ‘hyung being busy’ 

you rolled your eyes and grabbed your stuff to find out yourself. That’s what you get for asking a dumbass.

Yoongi had been exactly where you’d expect him to be, crammed into one of the practice rooms with his headphones and laptop.

“Yoongi,” you said, tapping on his shoulder. He spun around in a startle and looked at you with a relieved sigh.

“Oh god”he breathed out, “I thought you were one of the maknae begging for food”

You couldn’t help but to smile, all the prior annoyance melting out of your pores and back to the depths of hell where they belonged. Talking to Yoongi was easy, that is when he was still talking to you.

“How do you know I'm not begging for food?”you smirked, taking a seat on the lumpy couch.

“Well, are you?”he asked, raising a brow. You shook your head and leaned back into the couch.

“You’re off the hook”you said, “but I do have a question” “Which is?” “Why have you been avoiding me lately?”

The room grew silent enough you could hear a pin drop. Cornered was the only way you could describe Yoongi. His shoulders scrunched up and he seemed to fold in on himself.

“No reason,”he said plainly.

Your eyes narrowed.

“So you have been avoiding me?”

His eyes widened.

“That’s not what I meant-”

“Then what did you mean?”you asked. Your patience was wearing thin and your heart was racing something ugly.

“I was trying to give you space”

“Space for what? I didn’t ask for space!”you snapped.

“Space for you and Namjoon!”he snapped back, folding his arms over his chest.

“Me and Namjoon?”you gagged. “The last thing me and Namjoon need is space, please collect your dongsaeng cause he won’t leave me alone!”

“Well he’s your boyfriend!”Yoongi threw back.

Huh.

“Huh?!”You shrieked. 

“It doesn’t take a genius to find out,”Yoongi continued, rolling his eyes. “So you can drop the naive act”

“Naive act—Yoongi, you think I'm dating Namjoon?”you asked. You felt like you were going to be sick. Namjoon wasn’t bad by any means, he was just so older brother coded it was disgusting.

“I don't think, I know,”he said. “You guys spend all your time together,you go on dates,you take naps together; it’s obvious”

“Well since you’re such a genius”You said, “How come you couldn’t tell that i’m in love with you?”

Huh.

“Huh?”he said, spinning around in his chair to fully face you. You ran a hand over your face and honest to god laughed.

“Idiots”you said in disbelief. “You’re all idiots”

“Hey-”

“I've been pining over you for months and this whole time you think i’ve been dating Namjoon”you said, shaking your head.

“You’ve been what?”Yoongi said. 

“Crushing on you”you emphasized, “You idiot”

“i..I don’t know what to say,”he said. You sighed and fully leaned back against the chair, feeling all the blood rush to your head from your bold confession. This isn’t how this was supposed to go.

“You can let me down gently for starters”you chuckled humorlessly.

“Let you down—what are you talking about?”he asked.

“Just reject me already!”You exclaimed, waving your hands frantically. You felt like a madwoman.

“Why would I reject you?”his eyebrows furrowed.

You were going to be sick.

“I’m going to be sick”you laughed, running your hands over your face and god were you crying?

“Why are you crying?”he rumbled softly, leaning in and wiping the tears off your cheeks. You just laughed harder, but that ended up turning into a sob because you were so tired. You weren’t expecting a fairytale but this wasn’t the turn you thought today would take. You felt yourself being pulled closer and you knew you should pull away, you knew better. It was all too much and he would just hurt you, but his hoodie smelled like coffee. His hoodie smelled like coffee and his hands were warm as they wrapped around you. You always wondered if he ran hot or cold, but he was neither; Yoongi was pleasantly warm. His hand had somehow wriggled between the two of you and rested on your cheek, rubbing the streaks where your tears trailed. His breath rose and fell in a steady rhythm and for a moment you felt weighless.

“What a mess, huh?”he mumbled, tracing his thumb over your temple. “I went and made all these assumptions…because I was afraid to say I love you”

“You love me?”you whispered. 

“Mm”he rumbled in affirmation. “You didn’t know?”

“No”you said, keeping your voice low, scared if you spoke too loud, the moment would disappear.

“I thought I was being obvious,”he said.

“I thought I was being obvious,”you said. You pulled your head back to look at Yoongi and that gummy smile was on full display.

“We’re both idiots”

Actually dating Yoongi went much smoother than the confession process.

In the early days, the two of you spent a lot of time in the genius studio doing parallel play, you’d work on your assignments and he would work on music. 

Obviously with many interruptions from the maknae line + hoseok, occasionally being prodded by Seokjin and Namjoon to eat,drink and get fresh air

Y’all needed to touch grass and they were sick of it

Being so close to the band in their early days formed an immeasurable bond between you all

But it also lead to a lot of sacrifices on your part that you weren’t prepared to make. 

There was the obvious like no posting about the boys on social media,nda’s up the wazoo,etc. This was all expected and you were willing to do so.

What you weren’t prepared for was how cruel the kmedia could truly be. You weren’t from here, you were a foreigner and that already put a target on your back. The fact that you weren’t thin or pale didn’t help one bit either. 

Thankfully, the boys and Yoongi reassured you in private. Namjoon did damage control and argued with the company to do more on your behalf, while Jimin and the maknae stood by your side like bodyguards wherever you went in silent solidarity. You were never alone. Jin dropped you off at university in the morning, along with Jungkook. Scolding the two of you to have a good day and to eat something that wasn’t chips. Naturally, Jungkook would bring you back once your classes were done and continued to gripe that even though he was older than you, he was still stuck in highschool.

You still hold this over his head to this date.

So thankfully, you had support. Support that if you didn’t have you weren’t sure where you would be honestly. It really felt like you all had become a little family, and being so far from home that was something you desperately needed.

Once the group got larger and was in a more stable position you better believe they all stopped holding their tongues, especially Yoongi. He could be a little hard to read at times but you were not expecting him to be getting himself into full on twitter wars on a burner account over you 💀

“Yoongi stop telling people to kill themselves”

“No”

Being in love with Yoongi felt easy, it was natural. He continued to take care of you in little ways whether it was packing your lunch,giving you transit fare or rubbing your temples when you were tired and falling asleep on him.

Our mans is definitely about that acts of service life. He loves quietly.

Pda made him want to die just a little inside but he wasn’t opposed to holding your hand. It wasn’t like he had anything to hide anyways, you guys were already public. 

He wasn’t the jealous type and although he’d never admit it, he loved how much you and the boys love each other. He’s got a bunch of pictures on his phone of you just in the dorms being domestic. You spent more time there than you did in your own dorm room.

 So although he doesn’t say it often, he shows it with every part of his being. The way his eyes sparkle when he sees you in the morning, his proud smile in your graduation photos. It also made his heart flutter that you got his dry humor and you dished it right back to him, smack in the middle of the maknae line teasing him and Jin about being old.

And when you learned Daegu Satoori from Taehyung to surprise him? Namjoon had to hold him back from proposing on the spot. And to think he ever thought you and Namjoon were dating.

Yoongi bits ✨tid bits about you and yoongi ✨

Yes Yoongi genuinely thought you were drunk and he wasn’t flirting(he got that nuerodivergent rizz)

When Yoongi told you the mint hair wasn’t real and washed it out you cried 🧍🏾‍♀️

You guys have two apartments together, one near Hybe and one in Daegu. You both prefer the apartment in Daegu because that means Holly gets to stay with you guys.

Everytime a new design for shooky it mysteriously appears in the apartment.

You guys have two cats per your request(a white one named sugar and a black one named gloss) the things Yoongi does for love

You guys have been happily engaged for the past year and he proposed in the most unromantic way possible 

NSFW

Baby, Yoongi is a switch with a capital S

Now I have never met a non kinky neurodivergent person and Yoongi is no exception. He enjoys a good power dynamic and has definitely explored kink in the past with previous partners so he’s experienced.

 But Yoongi does occasionally just like to fuck, no rules no dynamics. Just vanilla sex

He’s a lot softer than his image and he honestly likes the separation between the two for his own sanity. The fans think he’s this no nonsense hardass, but he’d much rather praise and reward you than dole out punishments.

He’s a softie at heart and finds a bit of bratty behavior to be cute so you can definitely get away with a lot. Not to say he’s a complete pushover but he definitely will let a good amount of back talk slide before he puts you in your place. It's almost infuriating how calm he is if you’re the type that brats in hopes of a punishment. He’ll just look at you and laugh about how cute you’re being before returning back to whatever he was doing.

It’s pretty hard to tick him off but also not impossible, the easiest way to get him to snap is to mess with him in the studio; especially if he has a deadline coming up. That's how you end up on your knees crammed under his desk not even allowed to suck his dick but just sit there and keep it warm while he works. The condescending mumbles and coos he lets out while stroking your head is enough to send you careening straight into subspace. “Just needed something in your mouth, huh?”he’d purr and gently drag his nails across your scalp

Tongue technology. We all know about it, but you get to experience this first hand at your beck and call. Yoongi is the first one to admit you’re spoiled and when you’re not being a brat, all you have to do is ask and he’ll be in between your legs. He could and has spent hours down there teasing your folds and giving you orgasm after orgasm until you can’t take it anymore.

Somnophilia. This is a kink that goes both ways for you guys but honestly he finds it really hot when you take what you need from him. Waking up groggy in the middle of the night to you fucking yourself on his cock is one of the quickest ways to get Yoongi whining and gripping the sheets. Bonus points if you tie his hands up or cuff them to the bed posts.

He’s not really a fan of quickies and prefers to take his time, but he’s not opposed to shoving you into a closet and getting you off on his fingers if you’re getting needy. He just wants to take care of his girl.

Speaking of his hands, they end up around your throat and in your mouth quite often. Whether you’re sucking or gagging on them, Yoongi makes good on this little fixation and makes sure you get your fill.

He’s down to being pegged. Somebody had to say it guys,🗣️ Yoongi wants something up his ass ‼️

Whether you have him bent over a table or you’re tied up and he’s riding you, Yoongi does enjoy penetration and he’s not ashamed of it. He likes how dazed and pliant you get when he’s bouncing on your strap all flushed and pink and whining. it’s a rush to his head and sends him over the edge faster than he can get a hand on himself.

He’s a fan of cozy aftercare and pillow talk. After you’ve both cleaned up and the bed is moderately clean, he’s off in the kitchen getting snacks and water so you two can cuddle and recap what you liked and disliked. He gets really affectionate after he cums so it usually dissolves into him mumbling praises and kissing all over your face before falling asleep.

All in all Yoongi is the best boy.

[cottoncandyswisherz]

anonymous

bsf!triplets x depressed!reader

warnings: describes imposter syndrome, and poor mental health. this is so sad and i'm sorry. if you are not comfortable or stable enough to read this, then please dont because it might make it worse.

-

im laying in my bed when i hear the knock on my front door. i don't wanna get up. i just wanna lay here until my skin has fused with the mattress, so i ignore the knocking until it turns to pounding and makes the ache in my head even worse. 

i try to get up but i get dizzy so i plant my feet on the cold tile and sit at the edge of my bed for a moment. when i think i'm good i trudge to the door, and when i open it i see nick, matt and chris on my doorstop. chris has his phone to his ear but his arm falls when he see's me. 

chris's pov

holy shit. 

"i was just calling you to let you know that it was us at the door. " i told her. she only nods he head and walks back into her house, leaving the door open to let us know we can come in. 

my brothers and i all look at each other before we step inside. we know what each other are thinking.

she's not okay.

usually when we come back to boston, she's at our house when we get there. but we've been here three days and we hadn't seen her. when we called her, her phone goes straight to voicemail, our texts don't deliver and when we came yesterday she didn't answer the door. 

she's all of our friend but she's always been closer to me than matt or nick. she says because it's because i reciprocate her chaotic energy.

when we enter the living room, everything is in order. her kitchen is clean, and her bedroom door is closed. 

she still hasn't said anything. she won't even look at us. she just sits on the couch and picks at her nails. 

i look at nick in a way that says, what the fuck do we do? his look back says i have no fucking clue and we both nudge matt, who's eyes haven't left her since she opened the door. he looks at us and i can't tell what he's thinking. 

"we've been calling you since we got home." he says, walking over to the couch and sitting on the side opposite to her. "no answer. our messages didn't go through either."

she just blinks and says "my phone must be dead." he voice is scratchy and it sounds so weak that i just wanna hug her. 

"for three days?" nick asks, sitting on the floor in front of her in the living room. she just nodded. 

i make my way to her other couch and sit down. "and we came yesterday, but you didn't answer the door."

reader's pov

three days? 

the thing about depression is, it kinda collapses time. i don't even know what day it is right now. i feel like shit knowing they've been trying to reach me, but i can't find the energy to speak long enough to apologize.

"sorry." is what i come with. 

matts pov

chris, being the person he is states the obvious. "you don't look so good right now... like i don't recognize you right now."

my heart breaks when i see her head fall and a tear fall into her lap. "i don't recognize myself either, chris." when she speaks its a whisper. but the silence is so loud that we all hear it. 

then she wipes her face and lifts her head only to look at her reflection in the flatscreen that's powered off. 

"what's going on?" nick asks. 

she chuckles at that, but her eyes never leave her reflection. "i wish i could explain it. "

i decide that maybe i should say something, instead of just staring at her. "try."

she's silent for a moment. "you know how sometimes-" she swallows. "you know how sometimes you just look in the mirror and you don't know who you are anymore?" more tears slide down her face. "and you don't know how you got to the point you're at. and then that reality sets in that you've felt so.... so empty and anonymous for a while." her eyebrows furrow as she keep staring at herself. "but you didn't realize you were feeling it because you were so caught up in making sure everyone else was good because they have it worse than you and you really have no reason to feel that way. they became the priority." she sucks in a breath and wipes her face, even though new tear replace the old ones instantly. "but then you're looking in this mirror. and you see yourself. but it's not you. that it looks like you, but it's not you. it cant be. because this person in the mirror looks like everything is okay, but it's not okay. and so you try to make it okay... but you don't think it can ever really be okay anymore because you don't remember what okay feels like." 

and now she's silent. her face is blank and she won't stop looking at the tv. 

chris and nick keep looking at me like i know what to do right now. 

i don't.

but i do what i want someone to do if it was me in this situation. i get up and walk to her side of the couch and wrap my arms around her and that's when she breaks. 

her sobs vibrate through my chest and i hold her tighter. "i don't know who i am anymore, matt."

nicks pov

what. the. fuck. is going on?

i'm sitting here looking at my friend, who's face was stuck in a permanent smile yet i don't even remember what her smile looks like. 

i can't even begin to think about her smiling because her face is contorted in a way that shows how much pain she's in.

i can see how tired she is, because her dark circles are almost black. i can tell she hasn't showered because her hair is matted and i can see that she hasn't been eating because her face is so pale. 

she's been withering away in this house, while i've been making jokes for a camera. 

all i can do to show how sorry i feel is crawl from my spot on the floor and lay my head in her lap. "i wish it was different, babe." 

"so do i." she mutters.

readers pov

they must think i'm crazy. because matt never hugs people that aren't his brothers or parents, and nick has never called me babe. and i know chris thinks i'm fucked because he's just sitting on my couch staring at the floor while i'm drowning in both his brothers arms. 

we all stay like this for a while. nick and matt holding me while i just pathetically weep and chris in utter silence. 

until he's not silent. "why didn't you call me?" he almost sounds hurt. 

i know what i want to say.that i didn't call anyone. that i'm embarrassed. that i'm the person everyone goes to with their problems so how can i can go to them that i feel hollow when nothing is happening in my life for me to feel that way. 

but again, i don't have it in me to talk. so i just shrug. 

and he get's up from and walks over to me, pulling me away from nick and matt and making me stand up. 

his grip on my biceps is tight as he speaks. "you should have called me..." and he hugs me so tight that the little air i have left in my lungs is knocked out of me. 

and now we're just crying. me into his chest, him into my shoulder. at some point, nick and matt get up and join us and we all just hold each other until we've telepathically said everything that needs to be said. 

niyah speaks🤍 last sad one for now lollll

taglist: @mattslolita @muwapsturniolo @jnkvivi @sturnsslut @koilaniazul @thisisntmattsturniolo @nyktoxs-lover @l0akkzz @zainabthescientist @chaossturns

[urlovebot]

so 🧍I had a sudden thought abt experient bada n innocent reader where bada start trying out what kind of kinks turn on reader, but like, she does it cautiously, pet names here and there, trying out biting, risking some degradion maybe? hehe and she observe every reaction waiting for the time she can start abusing them until reader gives in🤭

this got me giggling and kicking my feet LETS GOOOOO

it really would start so cautious like she usually calls you "baby" "sweetheart"... throw a "honey" in every once in a while.

but then she starts calling you "princess" and like... its not necessarily out of character but you're like 😳 okay

your eyes dart up to hers the first time she says it and you get a little flushed so shes like! great!

now yall know i believe in corruption kink bada lee supremacy so

she thinks its so cute when she bites at your lip while you kiss

the first time she does it, its out of instinct- immediately she's like "baby- i'm so sorry. did it hurt?"

but then you were avoiding her eyes! so she grabbed your jaw a pressed a light kiss against your lips,

"did it hurt, princess?"

you look up at her, pupils dilated. you hesitantly nod but

she leans down and kisses you again, biting your lip once more.

this time you let out a small moan.

and bada just grins against your lips,

check!

she kisses down your neck, nibbling just below your ear

you grab at her hair and squeeze,

check!

now you're in the practice room.

she's just finished her joint class for "on my mama"

and you just kept staring at her through the entirety of her teaching, she was so focused.

you kinda got a little sad that she wasnt paying attention to you as much.

so when she's finishing up her choreo, she points at you and runs her hand down her hat (yall know wtf im talking about)

everyone is filing out and you're stood by the back mirror waving as people leave

finally the last student exits and bada closes the door behind them,

"how'd you like it?"

and you give her a passive "it was good."

she strides over to you, standing so close you were forced to lean your back against the mirror.

"just good?"

"it was great. i dont know what you want me to say."

bada mentally looks through her own personal kinks and- she found one!

she slots her leg between yours, grabbing your hips and pulling them towards her, effectively making you grind against her thigh.

your cheeks flush and she can see you gulp,

she leans down real close,

"my pretty girl wanted some attention, didn't she."

and you shyly nod- bada thinks youre so fucking cute like this.

she keeps her hands on your hips, moving you up and down her thigh.

"i'm so sorry baby, you want me to give you some now?"

you whimper and nod.

and thats how she eats you out on the floor of the dance studio!

check!

and her favorite one of all-

you've gotten so comfortable with her that you can ask her to have sex with you, but its still very hard.

she's got her headphones on, bobbing her head as she maps out her choreo.

her tongue pokes out every once in a while to wet her lips- she knows you're staring at her.

she specifically twirls her pencil through her fingers because she knows how much you like her hands.

so imagine her surprise when you insert yourself on her lap!

now shes the one blushing lmfao but she gathers herself!

she shifts her headphones so that one ear is uncovered-

"...yes?"

you are silent but your eyes are asking for something.

"think you can give me a couple more minutes?"

and this time you have the nerve to sigh and roll your eyes and oh-

lets test out another one!

"you're acting like a fucking brat."

bada scans your eyes for anything other than lust, but she doesn't find anything.

she continues,

"ready to slut yourself out whenever you want- you dont take into consideration anyone but yourself."

bada brings a hand to your jaw and pulls your face close to hers,

"i'm gonna teach you patience today. that okay with you, princess?"

and thats how you ended up getting edged for half an hour while bada fingered you in front of the mirror in your bedroom.

degradation... check!

edging... check!

this last one happened on accident.

you and bada finally went to a shop together and bought a strap- bada already had one but she wanted you to pick something for yourself.

she's taking you from behind, hands gripping your hips as she's rolling her own into you.

you're gripping the sheets under you, crying out so fucking loud that bada needs you to be quiet.

so she does what any sane person would do and she grabs you from the scuff of your neck, yanks you back towards her, curls her hand from the back of your neck to cover your throat and squeezes

"shut up and take it baby, take it like a good whore would."

and she didnt even mean for those words and actions to slip out

but when she sees your eyes roll to the back of your head, mouth drop open in a silent moan, drool ready to spill from the corner of your mouth-

she knows you were made for her.

anddddd scene!

[gummydummy19]

Hi Gummy👀❤️

um, because of the post you said about just now......

Thinking about Prof!Sherlock Holmes celebrate with you that your exams are over.

Correction: you sneak in his office with a bottle of champagne and wearing the lingerie he gifted to you a few weeks ago... He was very confused at the beginning(

Well, you did celebrate TOGETHER after all.👀😋

Gaahh I would love to celebrate with him! 🥳🫠 Thank you for the ask, jammie! Im very sorry this took so incredibly long and that its a bit shit maybe lol, I hope you still kinda like it :)

His best student

Content Warnings: smut, age gap (not specifically mentioned), college student/college professor relationships (abuse of power, just to be sure), pet names (little one, Sir, baby), smidge of angst for some reason

A/N: This story is a fantasy and purely fictional. I do not condone student/teacher relationships or abuse of power in real life. Since this is pure fiction, everything is consensual. (because it's my fantasy and I fucking wrote it that way)

Word Count: 1.9k +

He was busy grading papers, the usual frown on his face, not even looking up at you as you entered his office...

You eyed him hungrily as you locked the door behind you. "Do you know what day it is today?" you asked in a sultry voice, hoping to get his attention.

You'd been waiting for this moment for weeks, ever since he gifted you that black, lacy lingerie set a few days before your first exam. He'd had it delivered, knowing if he'd handed it to you himself neither of you would be able to wait. The box contained a note, written in Sherlock's beautiful handwriting, as per usual.

"A little gift to get you in the mood. I hope it motivates you, my dear. I expect straight A's from my best student x"

You had never been so excited to study. With your new-found motivation, you propped yourself at your desk, which is where you stayed for weeks. Focused and dedicated.

You hadn't touched yourself once in the past few weeks. Partly because you wanted to stay focussed, but also because you simply didn't have the time. You were so exhausted and mentally drained from studying all day, your back and shoulders were sore from sitting hunched over your desk for hours. When you finally got to bed at night you were so tired you almost immediately fell asleep.

And now the wait was finally over. All your hard work had paid off, straight A's across the board. You were proud of yourself, proud and incredibly horny, ready to collect your reward.

"Uhh...Friday?" Sherlock answered mindlessly, his eyes still glued to the red ink he scribbled across the paper.

You rolled your eyes before clearing your throat, hoping to finally get him to look up at you.

His eyes found yours, they were filled with confusion and a tiny bit of aggravation...until you let your coat fall open. The beautiful black set was revealed and you could almost hear the wheels turning in his head.

"Yeah," you spoke, "it's Friday"

A smirk tugged at his plushy lips, 'it's Friday", he repeated as the realization dawned on him.

"Hmm." you nodded, dropping your coat on the floor with a smile.

You took a few slow steps towards him, never once breaking eye contact.

"Passed all my exams, straight A's just like you wanted Mr. Holmes", you spoke innocently.

"Is that so?" he smirked, leaning back in his chair, his knees falling wider open.

"Uh uh", you nodded coyly, chewing your finger.

You took a few steps closer to him, keeping your eyes glued to his. You debated crawling into his lap and kissing him silly, but took a seat on his desk instead. "So I think I deserve my reward now, don't you?"

He was trying to contain himself a little longer, trying not to show how much of an effect you had on him. But the glimmer in his eyes told you enough. You couldn't help but smile at him. A warm genuine smile that told him how much you adored him and how badly you'd missed him.

He couldn't hold back the grin that broke free on his face and he stood up. Wasting no time before grabbing your face and crashing his lips to yours. The kiss was full of heat and passion. Your hands tangled in his beautiful brown curls before trailing down his neck and fiddling with the buttons on his shirt. It took every fiber in your being not to rip the fabric off him, but you decided to behave. You the last thing you needed was a punishment when you came here for a reward.

Luckily he noticed what you were doing quite quickly, and since there was not much left for you to take off, he decided to help you.

"Fuck...I missed you, little one", he mumbled against your mouth as he undid the final button on his shirt.

"Hmm...missed you too, Sir...so much", you sighed back, your hands sliding over his shoulders, under the fabric of his shirt, making it drop on the floor while your fingers tangled in his hair again pulling him in for another kiss.

The kiss became more heated, more impatient, and you felt yourself starting to buck against the front of his trousers. The growing bulge pressed perfectly against the thin fabric of your panties. The panties that were slowly but surely starting to get very sticky and damp...

He pulled his lips away from yours, only to trail kissed from your jaw to your neck, groaning into your nape once he got there. His large hands trailed up and down your waist, squeezing at your flesh wherever he could.

You wriggled your hands between your bodies, your fingers eagerly searching for the buckle of his belt.

“Need you now…right now…”, you whined as you pulled his belt from his pants, your desperation made him chuckle.

“Hmmm…my perfect pretty princess…”, his voice was low has his fingers trailed down your jaw. Your breath hitched when his hand made its way down your throat, you expected him to stop there, to squeeze it as punishment for being so impatient…but he didn’t.

His hand moved down a little bit further until he pressed his palm flat, right in the middle of your chest. You were sure he felt your heartbeat thumping.

“Lay back for me”, he commanded. His tone combined with the slight press of his hand left little room for arguing, so you did what he asked.

Your back his the cold wood of his desk and you stared up at him. He held your gaze while his hands moved to caress your legs, starting at your knees, up to your thighs and back to your knees, where he held a firm grip to keep your legs spread (as if you needed any help with that?)

You enjoyed every second of it, every single touch, every look…but you needed more.

“Please Sir…”, you whined, “haven’t I been a good girl?”

He once again chuckled at your shameless display of pure desperation. “Don’t frown like that little one, you’ll get wrinkles”

“Then don’t give me a reason to frown.”

Your inner brat was starting to show and you hated it. Not that you didn’t love your bratty side, because you absolutely did, but today it meant that he was winning and you had worked too hard to let that happen.

He was staring down at you with his usual raised eyebrow. “Come on, Mr. Holmes..please?", you tried, your foot inching up his waist until your toes touched the now massive bulge in his trousers. You moved methodically, creating a friction you knew he craved.

"Behave", his voice was stern, no doubt a cover-up for his neediness, but stern nonetheless. You ignored it, continuing your movements shamelessly until he growled. "Enough!"

In a matter of seconds had pushed your legs open again and he was on you. Your wrists pinned to the oak desk just like the rest of you. "I told you to behave, little one."

"Why? When I do you give me nothing", you argued, staring him dead in the eye. "I came here for a reward, but if you insist on punishing me go ahead. Either way, I refuse to leave here empty-handed. I worked my ass off for the past few weeks, haven't even touched myself once. I kept my focus, I got perfect grades, and now I wanna cum. I deserve to cum."

You had never spoken to him that way. Ever.

The two of you looked at each other in silence. His hands still had a firm grip on your wrists and the look in his eyes gave little away. For a split second, you worried you had gone too far. He was still your professor after all, and by far the most intelligent and respected man you'd ever met.

You were simply a young girl who happened to be in his class and sucked his cock the way he liked it. You were nobody. And yet here you were, sprawled on his desk demanding orgasms.

"I'm proud of you, you know that?"

His deep voice broke through the silence and with that also through your thoughts. "Huh?" you managed to get out.

He grinned down at you, but different than before. Less devilish, more pure. "You're right, you worked incredibly hard...and you deserve a reward..."

He dipped his head down, his curls brushing your face as he pressed kisses against your neck and shoulder.

The second you felt his warm lips press loving kisses on your skin your eyes fluttered shut. A relaxed sigh left your lips as you basked in his touch.

“Such a good girl…such a…an amazing woman you…”, he panted out his praises while kissing his way down your body.

You moaned when you felt his warm lips press against your core through your panties, he kissed and licked until he could taste you through the fabric, leaving it even more soaked than it already was.

“Fuck sir…” your fingers tangled in his curls again when he pulled your panties to the side and finally ran his tongue through your sopping wet folds.

He ate you out with vigour, humming and groaning into your pussy like a man possessed.

It wasn’t long before your thighs squeezed around his head and you shook with pleasure, letting out one final loud moan as your orgasm rushed through you.

“Fuck…” you giggled while staring at the ceiling, you swore you saw a couple stars fly around.

You could feel him grinning against your skin as he pressed a few more kisses on your inner thighs.

“C’mere…” your hands grabbed at him again, this time he didn’t even try to refuse. His large body stretched over you and his hands found the sides of your face.

You both smiled into the kiss, tasting yourself on his tongue was always such a turn on. You tasted great together, every time.

It wasn’t long before hunger consumed you again, and you could tell even though he just ate…he was still starving.

Your legs locked around his waist and you bucked your hips up into his bulge, whimpering a little from the overstimulation.

He didn’t need to be told what to do. He grinned as he leaned up. Never breaking eye contact with you while he lowered his pants and boxers, allowing his thick cock to spring free.

“My sweet girl….”, was all he said before slowly…ever so slowly…pushing inside of you.

He dropped down close to you, one hand on your hip, using it as leverage while he pumped in and out of you.

The other one right next to your face, keeping him from leaning his full body weight on you…not that you would complain…

“Fuck…s-sir…” your voice was barely above a whisper given that his nose was practically touching yours.

He pressed a gentle kiss against your lips, “call me by my name…please”.

You moaned and he slowly picked up the pace, “S-sherlock…Sherlock! Oh god, Sherlock”, you pulled at his hair as he fucked you passionately on his desk, fucking you deeper and harder each time you screamed his name.

“Yeah fuck…that’s it princess…shit”, he angled his hips while his hand slid down between your bodies, “cum for me baby…cum on my cock while I pump you full…can’t hold it much longer sweetheart, you feel so fucking good, fuck” his almost whiny tone and desperate look melted you to your core, and so you did what he asked, you came on his cock, hard.

“SHERLOCK! please please please….”, your walls squeezed him tightly and with one final thrust and a guttural groan he came inside you.

Sweaty foreheads and plump lips bumped against each other as you rode out the highs of your orgasms together.

“I love you…I love you”, he spoke quietly after a few beats of silence.

Once to himself, and once to you.

Taglist:

@metalbuckaroo

@princessayveke

@montsepliego

@scxrletrecsmarvel

@hopelesslyrogers

@eclecticpatrolroadlawyer

@tfandtws

@vicmc624

@ahahafudge

@enchantedbarnes

@wickedravyn

@pono-pura-vida

@amayaraestyles

@matchat3a

@fictional-hooman

@sebastianexplicit

@peaches1958

@avengersfan25

@jamneuromain

@tryingtoliveonmywishes

@mrsevans90

@daybreak96

@tiredqueen73

@fallingforunrealisticromance

@identity2212

@randomweirdoss

@ragamuffin285

@juliaorpll78

@geralts-yenn

@imjusthereforliam

@bangtanstoeart

@squeezyvalkyrie

@enchantedbytomandhenry.

@superduckmilkshake

@kingliam2019

@bascmve01

@missgaygurl

@foxyjwls007

@mollymal

@urmomsgirlfriend1

@luxeydior

@beck07990

@liecastillo

@warriormirkwood

@vintage-is-my-middle-name

@lucinapomona

@madebylilly

@nothingbettertosay81

@est1887

[winewinebloodwine]

[Chuuya scoffs, but doesnt dispute it]

Yeah well I wouldn't fuckin doubt it. My- my dazai used to be the fuckin one to deal with the at home security bullshit. I haven't updated it in a fuckin while, and I'm pretty much never fuckin here unless it's to duckin crash or cuz I got sent home.

and don't even think about it [Chuuya warns, clicking the top button that says <Reserved Top Floor [Penthouse]>]

If someone tries to take another one of my knifes today I'm committing fUCKING WAR CRIMES AGAIN SO FUCK OFF

[c1oud999]

hi

i just wanted to come on here and talk about my experience with spirituality. warning: longggg post ahead.

basically ive been in the spiritual community for YEARS now. ive had existential crisis since the age of 11 and ive gone through many phases of many different spiritual trends. from law of attraction, to witchcraft, to religious devotion, to law of assumption and now finally non dualism. i read books, meditated for hours and hours, talked to spiritual ppl from all walks of life and watched all the episodes of ganga upanishad (a show i still highly recommend, you can watch on youtube). all this childhood trauma and mental illness made me crave for sweet relief. but nothing really made sense until law of assumption. i thought that that would be it yk. i thought i was done searching but i think that was when i was searching for things the most. i do know i have it in my 4d, when will i see it? i thought i would get all my desires but did not meet success. and then the non dualism trend began and i hopped onto it like pretty much everyone else. i was bewildered at the stuff teachers kept saying. what do you mean everything's an illusion? there's no way that's true. my very real surroundings are causing me VERY real pain and suffering. oh no no there must be a deeper meaning behind all this. and so i read all the books in 4dbarbies drive, but nothing clicked. yes it made sense intellectually, but i didnt want to believe it bc where is the materialisation satisfaction here? also i felt none of the euphoria that was supposed to come with self realisation. which means i must not be a realised being. and then i cried and cried and cried, isolated myself, literally stopped going to school and just lay in bed all day. but ofc, i continued to read the tumblr posts like i had been doing for the past several years. and yesterday i read 4dkelly's post about giving up. it made sense. by the time i had finished reading the post i had truly given up on everything. on wanting, hoping, fearing, striving etc etc. i was SO tired. so i gave up. fell asleep. i woke up really late as usual and missed the school bus. i ate breakfast in silence, switched the tv on and lied down on the couch like always. and like always out of compulsion and force of habit i reached for my phone and looked up non dualism on twitter. and then i came across a tweet that said a simple sentence only- "nothing is ever actually happening." woah. that kinda drove me to the edge of the cliff i desperately wanted to jump off. i turned on some dnb background music and turned the shower on. i stood under the boiling hot water like some dramatic bitch and started piecing together the "puzzle". it all made so much sense now. i got out of the shower and left the house for the first time in months with a cute outfit and makeup on and everything. i went to the mall, bought candles, stickers, eye masks, coffee, and a doughnut with absolutely no social anxiety at all. i sat by window, read some poetry on my e-reader, cried, peered down at the floor below me and cried some more at the sight of little kids sitting on santa's lap and taking pictures and marveled at all the christmas decorations around me. it was insane. i decided i was going to be neutral towards everything but im in love. maddeningly so. in love with this dream that i thought did not love me back. but love is all there is. I AM ALL THERE IS. and i need you to take this literally. there is nothing happening. there is nothing here except you. nothing to fear, nothing to desire. ik a lot of people are going to dismiss this post because it's not a "materialisation success story" but i honestly dont think i can ever want anything physically bc in all its true essence, what is there to materialise? i am already whole and complete. i am lying on this cold hard floor, but i have never felt warmer. also ik there may be a lot of things ive written you might not agree with but again, this is NOT REAL. I AM. i hope this post helps you.

thank you to all the blogs ive come across and all the pointers they have shared: @se1f @realisophie @itgomyway @4dkellysworld @4dbarbie-backup @infiniteko @iamthat-iam and many more i cannot thank enough.

lots and lots of love (more than you can ever imagine), and good luck.

[heartfeltcherie]

hiya! I wanted to know if you could either do

A) An Alastor x G/N Reader angst thing where he’s having a 🤩mental💕breakdown🤞 and just…sobs to them while hugging them kinda? Idk I’m just feeling like a comfort/angst mood rn

OR

B) Platonic headcanons of Lucifer x Teen!Reader where he basically adopted them.

IF YOU CANNOT THAT IS AOK, IM JUST BEGGING YOU PLEEEAAASSSEEE

— i kinda went a different route but i hope u enjoy nonetheless!

☾. °.   ࿐  ` , •

the battle wasn’t supposed to end like this.

alastor was the one who should’ve killed adam. alastor was the one who was supposed to to leave a mark on that disgusting angel.

but here he was, sat on the floor in his beaten up radio tower, his wound open and leaving itty bitty cirlces of blood where he previously walked. he was rethinking his steps; how could i have possibly lost that?

he was distracted.

not only when his precious staff broke, but the entire time he was going back and forth with adam… he was thinking about you.

where were you during the fight? were you okay? were you hurt? you were still alive right?

you’re his darling doe, of course you’d still be alive.

because if you got hurt, or somehow ended up dead, he’d be ready to hunt down those idiotic extermination angels and use their screams in his next broadcast for everyone to know that-

“alastor?”

his eyes are wide and he didn’t even realize he was tugging on his hair, his face damp from… tears? what is this? he doesn’t shed tears, only his selected victims do. he stiffens up, takes his fingers out of his hair and stands up.

it hurts. the gash hurts. but he won’t let his face show it.

but you already know.

“mon cher… you’re alive. i knew my little doe would make it through” that’s a lie, he didn’t. he just hoped you would- is that a bruise around your eye? and a scar on your cheek? those bastards.

“i needed to. i had to get back to you, somehow”

oh, how his heart flutters at your little statement.

“oh, my dear…” alastor puts a gentle hand on your face, examining the bruise and scar at a closer angle. “they hurt you. i’m terribly sorry i wasn’t there in your defence” you put your hand around alastor’s wrist. “you don’t need to be sorry, al. you were busy with more important things” he hums. “to me, nothing is more important than you, doe”

you smile softly up at him. then your eyes trail down his body and the smile is quickly replaced with a frown.

“alastor, you’re bleeding! oh my god!” a surge of panic goes through you, acting as if your beloved deer demon might pass away in your arms if you didn’t act quickly. alastor chuckles, trying not to wince as he does so. “my dear, no need for all the dramatics. i’m perfectly fine! hardly a scratch!” you squint your eyes at him — now was not the time for his antics.

“if you don’t make bandages appear right now, i’m not gonna have tea with you in the morning for the rest of the week”

alastor rolls his eyes but complies nonetheless, snapping his fingers as some bandage rolls appear out of thin air. he hands you them; he’ll be even more damned if he doesn’t get to spend his morning quality time with you.

“sit” you notion to the chair he usually sits in. he follows your instructions as you kneel in front of him to get at a better angle.

you begin to put the roll of cloth material around your beloved deer demon’s wound, making sure it’s not too tight but also not too loose. you look up every once in a while to see his beautiful irises already looking at you and suddenly your fingers become clumsy and your a blushing and shy mess.

“nifty killed adam, by the way” you pipe up. “ahh, the little one finally got to stab something other than bugs” you finish wrapping the bandage around him, securing it with the clip it came with.

“it’s a good thing she did, otherwise i would have. when your shield broke, everyone… i thought… you were”

“dead?”

you don’t say anything, continuing to look at a nice piece of floor board that you suddenly thought was interesting while you were still kneeling on the floor in front of alastor. he uses his pointer finger to tilt your chin up.

“my dear. my darling doe,” all those pet names made your face feel like molten lava — and you’re sure you looked the part, too. “you should know that, of all beings, adam wouldn’t have been able to kill me. he’s far too messy and lacks control”

“but your wound? he got to you”

alastor stands up from his chair, putting his hand out for you to take. of course you do, and his hand is nice and warm compared to yours as he guides you up off the floor. he’s still holding your hand as his thumb glides over your knuckles in a soothing manner.

everyone would call you crazy if you said the feared radio demon was gentle with you; so soft and careful. but the butterflies in your tummy and the flutter of your heart says that it was all meant to be… for you.

“that’s hardly a topic of conversation, mon chérie. a worthy discussion, if i may,” he puts his empty hand, that isn’t holding yours, up against your cheek, cupping it. he uses his thumb on that hand to gently caress your skin. “is how… ravishing… you still look. even after the tell tale signs of a battle” you can’t help but to lean into his touch.

“and there you go, changing the topic of conversation, again” you sigh, eyes half lidded. “i don’t hear any complaints from your end” you shake your head because no… there wasn’t anything to complain about.

“not one bit, al. not one bit”

comments/reblogs are appreciated! ♡ let me know if you’d like to be added to the taglist!

also, check out our discord server :) click right here

tags; @crystalrayn @drxgonspine @alastorthirsty @speedycoffeedelight

[stqrgir1e]

warnings: afab!reader, p in v sex obvi, implied age gap perhaps 🤭, word cunt used, lowkey bad writing im kind of a newbie

authors note: first drabble- i think it’s ok. just kinda getting into the groove of writing again.

graves was quite the man to behold, every time you would have sex you had to take in every part of him- mentally and physically. sinking down slowly on his cock while making a mental note on how amazing he feels, so when he’s gone in a few days you’ll be fucking yourself to the memory- but can’t quite recreate the feeling.

you were rested in graves lap, legs spread in such a way where you were straddling him, cock buried deep in your cunt. his movements were slow and taunting, having all the time in the word it seemed. despite you being in his lap his broad arms were doing most of the work for you. the lewd image of his biceps straining as he used you, hands gripping your hips hard enough to leave small bruises was driving you near insane. your hips weakly attempt to meet his movements only to be stopped by the grip on your hips tightening.

“so impatient t’night doll…”

his voice was low- a mere whisper. you let out a quiet whine in return, resting your forehead against his broad shoulder. you put most of your energy into the moment, letting your mind fog and the worries from earlier seemingly disappear. you whined and moaned as if phils duffel bags weren't on your kitchen floor right now. the words spewing past your lips did not match your feelings of anxeity from an hour earlier.

lewd and vile sounds filled your shared bedroom, the sound of skin slapping and squelching from your sopping cunt surrounding the dark space. you wanted to snap back with some sort of bratty remark, but instead your mouth leaked breathy pants of desperation. your mind was covered in a lust fueled haze and it seemed as if the words spilling past your lips didn’t even match your thoughts anymore.

“mmm gonna miss you s’much phil…”

the words were muffled against his shoulder but still clear enough to make out. you regretted them as soon as they fell past your stupid lips. tonight was supposed to create a feeling of normalcy, normal sex. because if you had normal sex maybe tomorrow would be a normal day- and you bringing up the fact phil wouldn’t be there tomorrow obviously wasn’t keeping the comfort of normalcy you wished to keep.

you knew what you were getting into when starting a relationship with phil- knew your differences in age and career- but never did you think the goodbye-sex would be the hardest part. momentarily there was silence, only the sound of repulsive squelching and heavy pants filling the space. the silence spoke many words as you gripped tightly onto the muscly flesh of graves bicep. your skin tacky with sex and love marks dancing across your neck and chest.

a heavy half sigh half groan fell past graves lips, head falling back with a loud groan, “fuck gonna miss y’too sweetheart. takin me so well doll, so so fuckin pretty.”

[bgomtori]

☆ consume - c.bg

synopsis - you have a major exam coming up, after realising that you've been neglecting your health, beomgyu decides to step in.

-> beomgyu x reader

-> established relationship, high school au!

-> warnings! yn kinda starves herself and beats herself up for not remembering anything :( , pressure from studies, mental breakdowns and burnouts. yn is kind off a studies>you typa girl.

-> note! im having a big exam coming up soon, 'm extremely anxious.. so i kinda wanna write this to relieve somw stress :)

pressure, high standards, academic validation, from your parents, teachers and even yourself were taking a toll on you. staying coped up in your room for weeks, drowning yourself in revision notes, study guides, and past year papers. one may think that you were insane for being able to sit by your desk for such long hours, you thought the same too, but anything for your parents to tell you that they were proud of your achievements, anything to make yourself satisfied with yourself.

hours of cramming notes, and self study was definitely not easy. you'd often find yourself placing your phone under your pillow, preventing yourself from getting distracted by any notification from your friends or boyfriend. it wasn't any better, you'd often skip meals, your parents were usually out till late into the night, making it easier for you since no one forced you out of the room to eat. of course you'd take showers, make yourself refreshed before continuing your long study sessions, snacking on a few energy bars and drinks to pull all nighters to finish a chapter or subject. it was definitely not healthy, but this was like a routine for you when the year end exams were nearing.

you wouldn't be surprised if you arrived at school to see a panicked beomgyu standing by your lockers, glancing at his phone every now and then, wondering why you haven't replied to his calls or texts, he had a brief idea why, but he needed confirmation. you greeted him as per usual, your signature bright smile appearing on your lips, yet why does your eyes still look so tired? beomgyu's face was perplexed, were you staying up again.

"why haven't you replied my messages or calls yn?" beomgyu raised his eyebrows, you looked at him in confusion, switching on your phone to see 38 messages and 7 missed calls from beomgyu. you chuckled, wiping your sweaty palms against your shirt.

"i kinda turned off my phone, and placed it under my pillow so i wouldn't get distracted.. sorry." you apologised, feeling guilty, all beomgyu did was want to care for you, yet you're placing your studies over him. beomgyu sighed, combing his hair through his slender fingers, "i'm just worried for you yn.." his pout made you giggle, your hand patting beomgyu's squishy cheeks in reassurance, "i'll be alright."

"oh right, i'm staying back after school, one on one session with my teacher so you don't need to wait for me 'kay?" you informed, interlocking your arm to beomgyu's as you walked down the crowded hallway. beomgyu hummed in response to you, giving you a chaste kiss on your lips. "i'll see you in your classroom later." beomgyu bidded you goodbye, leaving you to make your way to your seat. scrolling on your phone, you read the messages your friends sent you, replying to all of them, apologising for worrying them so much.

"yn!" hanni called out, dragging a seat towards your desk, the scratchy sound against the floor tiles made you flinch in disgust. "what is it hanni." you replied, freezing at the sudden physical contact of her hugging you like a koala.

"you're not burning the midnight oil again right." hanni grumbled, removing herself from your shoulders. you shook your head, in hopes that she'd believe you. "lies! i know you all too well yn, this month is where you constantly shove your face in textbooks and study guides!" hanni basically shouted for the whole class to hear. you had to quickly shut her up by cupping your hand around her mouth.

"fine, you got me, but it's not like i'll die.." you whispered out the last part, making her gasp dramatically. you shushed her again, placing your index finger on your lips. "you need to take care of yourself yn, i don't want to see a repeat of last year ever again!" hanni nagged, similar to your mother, folding her arms as well. you felt yourself laugh nervously, you knew that you were slowly crawling back into the dark hole that you always find yourself in whenever the final exam season was soon.

classes went by slowly, you found yourself zoning out, bopping your head due to fatigue, you should have bought an energy drink during lunch earlier. after what seemed like hours, you last class was over, students from your class immediately left once the teacher dismissed them, you stayed put, waiting for everyone to leave while you slowly walked towards your teacher.

"sorry for troubling you ms lee.. but i really want to do well this year." you bowed, taking a seat infront of her. she shook her head, "you're fine yn, i can see that you're putting in the effort, that's what i'm proud of." you felt yourself grow speechless, the few words that you've been wanting to hear from your parents came out of your teacher's mouth instead. you didn't know what to do or say, you gave her a quick smile before you two started your little tutoring session.

"you're doing just fine my dear, you'll do just as well for the upcoming end-of-years." ms lee patted your shoulder, ushering you towards the classroom door. you bowed, bidding her goodbye. a sudden wave of negative thoughts started crashing over you, why? you didn't want to grow attached to a teacher that gave you the care and concern your parents should have given, along with the thoughts of you wanting to do extremely well for ms lee, for yourself, and even your parents even if it did nothing. you just didn't want anyone to be disappointed in you. you plugged in your earphones to cancel out your overpowering thoughts, blasting your shared playlist with beomgyu.

ynn ★: i just ended, going home rn..

ynn ★: wyd?

gyu :> : taking a break from revision, kinda lazy today

gyu :> : it's getting late, go home safely mkay? i love you

ynn ★: i love you too gyu :)

he was so sweet to you, you didn't deserve this especially how you were treating him. you prioritised your studies over him, hence not giving him the same amount of attention. you unlocked your front door, immediately heading into your room to start work. you showered, did your facial routine, and turned on your nightlamp. your table was messy, filled with all, notebooks, textbooks, loose practice papers, and stationary. you groaned, you weren't feeling like it, but you couldn't stop. you knew that you'd regret it.

each word you wrote looked like scribbles, you spelt things wrong. why wasn't anything going your way right now? why is your mind going haywire, was it because of earlier? tears pricked your eyes, you couldn't do this anymore, you felt overwhelmed from everything, mentally exhausted in general. you slapped your face, in hopes that you'd stop crying but it continued, you were breaking down, losing complete control of your feelings. first time after a year, sure you've cried many times this year, and past years, however, this felt like your worst one yet.

you quickly picked up your phone, you wanted beomgyu, you needed him to console you. hitting the call button, your fingers were trembling, soft pleas coming out of your mouth for him to hurry up.

"yn?" his voice called out, it was rare for you to call him so suddenly. you sniffled, bringing your phone's mic towards your lips, "please, come over.. you have my keys, just come please gyu." you stuttered, unable to speak properly due to how dry your throat was. you could hear from beomgyu's end how frantic he was, him grabbing his keys to dashing out of his house. "i'll be there in 3, please wait yn." you hummed, ending the call. you replied beomgyu's messages, his attempt to keep you distracted, but your thoughts were too overpowering, you continued sobbing, your fingers digging into your thighs, scratching them from time to time.

"yn." beomgyu whispered, closing your bedroom door, locking it just in case your parents suddenly came home, and saw you in this state. you hiccuped, turning towards him, beomgyu looked at you with concern, this was the first time he has seen you like this after a long time. he gave you his hoodie that he knew gave you comfort, before pulling you into a tight embrace. you continued crying on his shoulder, probably making a wet mess on his shirt right now, but beomgyu didn't care. beomgyu's fingers rubbed the back of your head, whispering sweet nothings in your ear.

"you're okay now yn, it's alright. let it all out." beomgyu mumbled, his soothing, calming voice, making you feel less like shit. you felt yourself slowly easing up, pulling away from beomgyu's comfortable shoulder. beomgyu took a piece of tissue from the box at the corner of your desk, blowing your nose for you, his thumb wiping away the single tear falling from your face.

"let's lay in bed, i'll make you some instant ramen alright?" beomgyu rubbed your cheek, before aidding you towards your bed, he made sure that you were comfortable before he went to your kitchen to prepare some samyang, your favourite. you laid there on your bed, scrolling on your phone, still suffering with a stuffed nose, but you could smell beomgyu's scent on the hoodie he gave you, consoling your thoughts.

the aroma of the spicy carbonara samyang filled your nostrils, making you sit up. you grabbed the bowl beomgyu passed to you, slurping it up to your heart's content. "nice?" beomgyu asked, sitting on the edge of your bed, his head propped his head onto the palm of his hand, watching you with gentle eyes. you nodded your head, chewing on the cheesy noodles. you twirled the noodles around the chopsticks, tilting them towards beomgyu, wanting him to eat them. beomgyu took a big bite, savouring the creamy, spicy sensation of the noodles.

"i think i should be a chef." beomgyu joked, trying to make you feel better. you giggled, placing the empty bowl on the nightstand next to your bed. you signalled beomgyu to lay next to you, wanting to cuddle with him in bed. beomgyu obliged, allowing you to nuzzle into the crook of his neck, the vibration of his humming, made you feel relaxed. your body was practically on top of beomgyu, while you cling onto him like your life depended on it. you looked up to stare at beomgyu, through your fluttering eyelashes, giving his jaw a chaste kiss.

"hm?" beomgyu hummed, using his free hand to stroke your soft hair, you pouted slightly, still snifflinf a little from your breakdown. your fingers laced around his as he used his thumb to rub your knuckles gently, assuring your that everything is in control now.

"i love you beom." you muttered, loud enough for him to hear, "i'm sorry for suddenly worrying you, i don't know, my first instinct was to call you." you rambled, apologising for being such a burden to him, you felt tears slowly welling up in your eyes again. you said whatever concerned was distracting you, letting out a few tears.

"it's just so tiring to try to make everyone around me proud of me when no one even cares, not even my parents. at this point i'm doing it for myself, for my own validation, but i can't see any improvement, or just something that i can take pride in." you choked out, full on ranting to beomgyu while he stayed quiet, rubbing your hand in small circular motions. his eyes stayed on your figure, making sure that you know he's listening to you with all ears.

"i'm sorry if i'm ever a bad girlfriend to you, you give me so much attention, love, and care, but i can't seem to reciprocrate it, i love you so much, but i don't know how to prove that to you.. i'm afraid that'll you'll leave me for someone better, someone that'll shower you with affection." you apologised, reasoning yourself. beomgyu's eyebrows were knitted together, how could you say that? you were the best thing that happened in his life.

"yn, you know i don't care if you don't provide me the same amount of adoration or anything, as long as i know that you're okay, and that you're still here to stay by my side. then that's all i ask for. i'm honest." beomgyu carressed your cheek, while your lips trembled, your eyes glossy, blinking back the tears threathening to fall out. beomgyu's plump lips curled up, pecking your lips.

"just don't overwork yourself, i hate seeing you like this, you make me worried." beomgyu warned, you slightly chuckled, "i'll try to improve myself for you gyu." reassuring him.

[gomzdrawfr]

want to join the fandom cause it seems fun seeing fanarts and you and others interacting but I don't know how...and with the whole ai thing im scared...

my advice: just do it

really! sometimes all you really need is a leap of faith, and that was exactly how I dropped into the cod fandom. When I joined the ghoap discord server I talked to one of the artist I really like and respected from my lurking time (hi @bressynonym) aaaand the rest is history

I didnt know how to draw properly, nor digitally, all I did was scribbling on OneNote (yeah!) and rambled about cod characters, it is daunting and it is scary to interact but after a while? you may just be able to find someone to brainrot together with

start small, like commenting, reblogging, talking, chatting- doesn't have to be towards artist/writers, it could be the art/fic enjoyers!

you need to put yourself out there if you want something

as to if you want to start in the fandom as a creator, here's some more tips (which are all based on my experience, I am no pro at doing this, hell Im still learning myself, and I am by no means speaking these on behalf on others!)

establish a goal: what are you making? fandom based? original creations?

as with starting new, everything may take a while for stuff to happen, you'll feel like you're speaking to the void at times (esp with original arts, but do know that your stuff do get perceive by others as time goes, I would advise to draw fandom stuff as a beginning to get that boost going if you want! or else it's going to be quite hard to get things rolling)

imo this is hardest part of any new creator, you'll have to bear with it and try not to give up (but I understand how incredibly demotivating it could get, there were times when I stopped posting about Raven entirely, but eventually I post it anyway cuz surely someone out there will like them, it just takes a lot of patiences and perseverance)

btw, engagement can also vary from time to time, you may be booming for a bit, then suddenly you dont, it is a cycle that will bound to happen

take rest regularly, and I mean a break from social media because numbers, discourse and everything can get to you, very quickly (I cannot emphasise this enough)

the numbers are not worth it over your mental health (comes with practice to really solidify this thought)

study the algorithm (pain): see what other creators are doing to get where they are, what tags are they using in their post? what features/niche do people like?(this is, if you really want to grab some form of engagement, bcuz reminder in the end you are creating art for yourself first!)

example: I think posts would get more reach if you tag it with the ship name first, followed by the characters' name (doesn't work all the time tho)

that's the thing about algorithm, it is ever-changing, and you'll have to learn to adapt with it when it does!

expanding on that, studying algorithm could be about ships (for example, ghostsoap is most popular in the fandom), or really good rendered art/flashed out fic that leaves your jaw on the floor, or ships that gets lesser attention in general which puts you, who make content about them, easier to be brought into the light (like Faralex)

bUT, it can also be personality!

(again, not saying this is meant for everyone and strictly from my own experience + what I observe) for me, I made up the lack of my art by establishing a personality: a wild panda who yaps about price and their oc and also kinda everywhere in the place (just like this post LOL), OR you're the person who named themselves after Soap's ash particle number OR you're the one who likes bottom Ghost- literally anything goes, you want to make an impression in different ways, some more funny/goofier than others but it works (be mindful and stay respectful tho, dont wanna be the asshole in the fandom now do ya?)

efforts ≠ engagement (not all the time, but most time) and this is a fact. Sometimes, you can't expect a piece you did for 10+ hours to get thousands views and likes, especially in a fandom space. You need to understand algorithm is that wonky. (very disheartening, but again, you make the art for you and the few others who genuinely likes them, and those people can go a long way) be mentally prepared for such events, and try not to beat yourself up too much for it

ultimately tho, do it, do it scared but do it anyways and again, draw the things that bring you joy, I hope these could be helpful in some ways!

[unknownteapot]

In light of Courtney mentioning they would possibly want to direct a movie some day during the Q+A, what do you think a Smosh movie would look like with this current cast? Would it be similar to the original Smosh Movie? I'm imagining something similar to Smost the Sitcom Live, like a sitcom comedy maybe? Anyway you don’t have to answer, I’m just curious 🤗

anon, you are NOT ready i was BORN for this question and i'm about to type up a storm so strap in!! thank you for sending it in!!! me being a yapper + film student is not boding well for me rn...

i completely see what you mean about a sitcom/comedy type thing, their vibes during ssl were immaculate, but i also think if they *were* ever going to make a movie it'd be something vastly different from what they've done before just to keep it fresh and give people something never seen before. which is why..

i propose to you: a horror comedy about the cast getting stuck at the smosh office overnight (more below the cut)

hear me out HEAR ME OUT god im so passionate about this. this type of premise would avoid the cast having to play characters per se, they'd kind of just play 'themselves' so it's easier for the existing smosh fanbase to transition to this new movie format without it feeling gimicky/overproduced- the movie begins with just a typical end-of-video outro into the camera for smosh games (maybe only main cast and not freelance? bc full cast might be too many people for a movie idk) and then cuts out to the cast getting off the soundstage like hehe good shoot whatever whatever. but. wait a second. why is it past midnight?? quickly they're realising everyone's gone and its WAY late and they're locked in. all the clocks have stopped around the office. phones are all out of service (but show a weird little digital snake symbol as foreshadowing to something ;)

so now they're like uh-oh. what the fuck do we do. and promptly the cast splits into groups/pairs that all deal with this in their own way the movie would cut back and forth between. maybe amanda and angela deciding to steal alcohol from the kitchen and then snoop on people's desks?? finding out ian has a love locket of anthony in his drawer?? damien grows mushrooms under his desk??? olivia collect's people's candy wrappers?????? idk it could be ANYTHING which makes thsi SO FUNNY to me

BUT this is where the horror comes in, because suddenly people start going missing. and its not fun and games at all. the air feels weird, its like 3 am, everyone's losing their shit a little bit. they start regrouping to see who they can find "hey have you guys seen Angela?" "No, but Courtney just went missing too." "Guys I don't feel well.." AND LITTLE BY LITTLE. THEY START SEEING APPARITIONS. SMOSH CHARACTERS. WHO HAUNT THEM.

like i'm sorry. tell me it would NOT be hilarious for Mental Illness to come haunt the cast in an eerie ghost form??? Augustus??? insulting the cast (but hitting truths about them) making them think about their life decisions??? COURTNEY FREAKING MILLER???? JUST YELLING???? TELEPORTING AROUND THEM AND SCARING THE SHIT OUT OF THEM>?>>>>??? god the jumpscares they could do with this insane INSANE. BIZANKA???????????????? im

BUT NOT JUST SMOSH CHARACTERS- fnaf characters in their eerie ass suits, chica demanding Amanda why she held the door so hard that one time and didn't let her in meanwhile everyone is terrified and somewhat sobbing

so now its CHAOS, they're trying to stick together to avoid getting haunted, they're trying to find their missing friends, they're running around to the footsteps of animatronics, when suddenly they find a door to some storage closet open. they walk in.

there they are!!!! all their missing friends lying passed out on the floor and.. what's this strange hissing noise and why is it kinda foggy in there.. "Oh my god!" Amanda yells out in relief that none of this was real (or was it), "There's a gas leak at the smosh office!" And then promptly passes out. So do they all. THE END.

maybe a post-credits scene of ian and anthony coming into the office in the morning and finding a MESS and them all passed out like god. we gotta put baby gates in here or some shit. they keep messing stuff up!! OR BETTER. they dont know about the cast at first and look at each other with knowing smirks like "wanna go get high :)" and then they head towards where all their friends are passed out and we find out it was actually their secret 'gas leak' spot where they get high on the regular from the gas. ian pouting like "damnit. they found our secret spot :(" anthony shruggs like "oh well" and then they prance around the room trying to huff the gas like idiots and also pass out.

more insane ideas idk how to incorporate yet:

a comedic bit where Amanda bonds with Chica from fnaf and reads her tarot cards (amanda would SO be the person to chat her up after getting over her initial fear and be like 'hey, you just need love, honey. i get it, we've all been there') and its this insane horror yet adorable moment where these two world collide?? BONUS: if the rest of the cast hide in a corner and look at her like "how is she doing this???"

Tim the IT guy actually turning out to be a hologram that haunts all the computers with snake graphics (from that one smoffice sketch 'it could happen to any one of us!') and actually gets his energy from sucking out ram from people's devices

Props and shit moving!!! just so much potential

INNOVATIVE FORMAT:

AND a great way to introduce horror elements could be through this whole 'found footage' thing- you know how in some movies you find like someone's security cam recording etc etc. they could SO integrate elements of that because the smoffice is primarily for content creation so there's LOTS of cameras everywhere

"Hey uh.. guys I think this camera's still rolling." And its us watching footage of that room through it MASTERFUL. or people recording tiktoks and we watch through their screen recording but we see stuff in the background moving before they do YEAH. the HORROR OF IT. god i love movies

okay for everyone's sanity i will now stop i was actually not expecting to type this much- anon who sent this ask, i owe you everything!! im now obsessed with this idea i wish this was real w o w

[anxious-witch]

So a continuation of this soulmate poly! JO au

So! Again, this is not my usual high quality stuff, isn't beta read or edited and I have been feeling kinda eh about writing lately so...yeah. Be warned before going into it. But so many of your wanted some sort of conclusion so I had to give you one. I hope it's at least somewhat satisfying.

This needed a warning for vomitting not the last one my bad, also TW for Bojan's general low self esteem

Bojan wasn't feeling well. And it wasn't only because he was hungover from the whole spiked drink yesterday. No. It was also due to the fact that now they all knew that he was their fifth soulmate.

He woke up surrounded by three of them. Jure was curled around his right side, with Kris' arm thrown over both him and Bojan. Bojan was snuggled in Jan's chest and Jan's hand protectively hovered over his head.

Nace was probably already up. Bojan laid there fir a moment. Soaking in the warmth. For once, his soulmark didn't ache but instead hummed pleasantly. 

It felt so natural, it was hard to remember why he was so scared of it. 

Then a sudden nausea hit him and he had to practically launch himself from the bed. Jan stirred and sleepily called out to him, but Bojan didn't turn. He ran to the bathroom, just in time to throw up in the toilet.

He wasn't sure how he ended up on his knees and gripping the toilet. He also wasn't sure when Jan joined him by sitting on the floor and rubbing his back. 

Only when he stopped throwing up for more than a few seconds did he lean more into the comforting touch. 

"Aren't you supposed to be angry at me?" Bojan mumbled tiredly.

"Oh, I am furious," Jan said easily, "I just don't see the point of having this conversation until you feel better."

Bojan made a pityful sound, closing his eyes. His head hurt, his stomach hurt, his soulmark ached. He just wanted to die.

"You might as well. I am feeling miserable anyway. We can go for full physical and emotional destruction."

Jan sighed and gently ran his head through Bojan's hair. 

"Kris went to make you tea and Jure to dig out some painkillers. Nace will probably make something to eat when he comes back from his run, if he hasn't already."

Jan scratched his scalp, like he was a dog. It was pleasant though and Bojan couldn't help but let iut a sigh and lean into it. 

"I don't deserve you guys."

The fingers in his hair froze. You said something stupid again, Bojan's mind hissed.

"We'll talk about that too."

"I'm sorry."

Jan continued stroking his hair, but didn't reply. Bojan's soulmarked burned like a brand. He hates you, he hates you, he will never forgive you-

Kris arrived at that moment, taking in their state. His eyes softened as he watched them.

"How are you feeling?"

"Like shit. I don't know if you are asking physically or mentally, but the answer is the same."

Kris crouched down and gently put his hand on Bojan's forehead. His eyes fluttered shut at the gesture.

"You don't have a temperature," he mused, "which means just a bad hangover. You should come back to bed. I bought a bucket if you are sick again. And there is tea and painkillers. Nace is making pancakes too."

Bojan felt a sudden pressure of tears. Why were they all so nice? So considerate? Shouldn't they be yelling and demanding an explanation? He felt like he'd prefer that. It was what he deserved.

"Bojan, hey, what's wrong? Does something hurt?"

Kris gentle voice snapped him out of his thoughts and he realized he was crying. He shook his head and covered him face. 

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Why wre you all being nice? Why aren't you yelling at me? Why-"

"Shhh." 

Kris hugged him to his chest and Bojan's body shook im his embrace. He kept a litany of apologies through the sobs.

"Jan, go tell Nace to finish pancakes later. I will get Bojan to the bedroom. I think we all need to talk first."

Jan probably nodded, because Bojan heard him get up and step out of the bathroom. Then Kris gently picked him up. Bojan didn't even complain, simply buried his face in Kris' chest. 

He carried him to the bedroom.

"What happened? Is he alright?"

Bojan's heart squeezed at Jure's worried tone, but he didn't feel capable of answering. Which was why he was thankful for Kris.

"I am not sure. He started apologizing and then burst into tears. I think everything is hitting him just now. And you know how the bond can be overwhelming at first."

When he put Bojan on the bed, Jure curled at his back. Bojan reached out with one hand to him. 

And Jure took it, interlacing their fingers. His and Kris' presence calmed him down slightly. Enough for him to stop babbling apologies at least, if not stop crying yet. 

"Oh, Bojan," he heard Nace say from further away. 

Then two more bodies joined the pile. Bojan could recognize each, despite having his face buried in Kris's chest. 

That slowly made him calm down enough to stop the tears and carefully pull back from Kris' chest.

Kris didn't let him go far, gripping his waist when he tried to. Which was ridiculous, because they all surrounded him. He cleared his throat, blood rushing to his cheeks.

“Right. Can we just…get this over with, please?”

“Get it over with?” Jan hissed.

Bojan flinched a bit at his tone, ducking down to hide in Kris’ chest again.

“Jan,” Nace chastised him from somewhere behind his back, “Let's try and do this calmly.”

Jure squeezed his hand and then Jan swore, almost as if someone elbowed him.

“Fine.”

“Bojan, could you sit up, please?” Nace asked.

Did he have much of a choice at this point? Bojan sat up, suddenly much more aware of four pairs of eyes watching him.

He stubbornly stared into his lap.

“Tell us what happened,” Jure urged gently. 

“I was at the bar, I was flirting with a guy. He drugged my drink.”

Jan sighed loudly, but it was Kris who spoke up.

“That's not what we are asking. We want to know why you don't want us.”

That made him snap his head up, staring at Kris in disbelief. Kris, who was biting his lip and looked incredibly close to tears.

“What? I never said that!”

“You made it quite clear.”

Bojan felt as if he'd been slapped. He could take them being angry, or even saying they don't want him anymore, but he couldn't take them thinking he didn't want them.

“That's not true at all! Of course I want you!”

Kris did not look particularly convinced, hunching in on himself. Bojan met Jan's eyes instead.

“Then why didn't you say anything? Jesus, Bojan Kris knows you for a decade.”

“Because by the time I realized, the two of you were already together! And then I couldn't say anything because I thought that if you had each other, why would you want me?”

Jan took in a sharp breath and Kris paled noticeably, but Bojan wasn't done. He turned his eyes to Jure.

“So I kept silent, until Jure came along. And then he fit right in. Not just in the band, but with the two of you. And I thought, fuck, I'm too late. So I didn't say anything again. By the time Nace came into the picture, I-I had no idea what to do. Besides, we all know I would ruin this.”

Jure crossed the distance between them in a second, practically launching himself towards Bojan and pulling him into a hug. 

“Never,” Jure said vehemently.

Bojan felt a sudden wave of love wash over him. It took him a second to realize it wasn't coming from him, but from the Jure's side of the bond.

It was enormous and overwhelming and Bojan was completely unprepared for it. Which made panic seize his chest. 

Then, Nace was there, putting a hand on the back of his neck.

“Breathe. I know it's overwhelming at first, but just breathe through it. Jure, back up a bit he isn't used to the bond yet.”

The sensation eased up a bit, even if Jure didn't let go of him. Bojan took in a shaky breath. 

“Why do you think you'd ruin it?” Kris asked after a moment. 

Feeling their emotions in tandem with their words was new. Even without prying, he could feel hurt and worry from Kris. Bojan realized with a pang that that meant they could feel the turmoil of his emotions, too.

This was exactly what he wanted to spare them from.

“Because of this! I am difficult to deal with. I know all of you know it, because you had to deal with me. But that's different from being in a relationship with me. Kris met like, all of my girlfriends, he can testify.”

Jure's arms tighten against him, paired up with a slight pang of annoyance. Bojan bit his lip to stop himself from apologizing. They should be aware of what they were getting into.

He expected Kris to look angry or maybe defeated, but instead he looked thoughtful. 

“From what I remember of that, the biggest issue was you putting us and the band in general before them. Which wouldn't be a problem here, would it?”

Bojan stared. He never thought of it like that. 

“That's still not a good idea. I am difficult to deal with. You'll get tired of me.”

Jan snorted and Bojan turned to glare. Jan met his gaze calmly.

“Right. Because before this we never took care of you being sick every two to three weeks? Nace didn't calm you when you got panic attacks? Jure and I don't regularly feed you because you are unable to cook more than two meals? Kris doesn't have your schedule memorized and reminds you of what you need to do?”

Bojan felt as if Jan's gaze was burning through him, right into his soul. He ducked his head. Except, Jan reached out and Jure moved, curling at his left so Jan could tilt Bojan's chin up. 

“Look at me.”

So Bojan did, a zing of electricity going down his spine as he did so. Any rational argument he had got thrown outside of the window.

“You borrow our clothes and you cuddle with us and we are all together almost 24/7. Why the fuck would that change if we were in a relationship with you?”

Bojan opened and closed his mouth several times, feeling as if Jan had just knocked out all the cards from his hands. Like all the insecurities that held him back were insignificant in the face of Jan's argument.

His head suddenly started hurting even more and he closed his eyes.

“I don't know.”

“Alright. Postponing the rest of this for later. Bojan, go brush your teeth, we'll bring tea and painkillers in the meantime.”

Leave it to Kris to organize everything in a second. 

“Can't I get a coffee?” Bojan asked, peering at him and pointedly avoiding Jan's gaze.

“After we are sure you won't throw up again. Do you need help getting up?”

Jan finally let go of his chin and Bojan tried not to feel disappointed. He never kissed any of them properly, it was always something for the cameras. 

He wondered what it would be like to kiss them for real. 

That thought scared him enough to jolt him into action and he quickly got up from the bed. Too quickly, since dark spots began to dance in his vision.

Nace swore and reached out to steady him. 

“I'll go with him-”

“No,” Jan interrupted, “you go finish those pancakes. I got him.”

Bojan tensed. It wasn't that he didn't trust Jan, because he did. He trusted all of them with his life. The thing was, Jan seemed the most angry out of all of them and he didn't sugarcoat anything. Bojan wasn't sure how being alone with him would go.

No one protested though, Kris simply exchanged a long look with Jan and then nodded.

Bojan wondered if that simply cane with sharing a bond for so long and then he suddenly felt very, very lonely.

So he didn't protest when Jan took Nace's place and led him to the bathroom. He took his toothbrush and brushed his teeth. Jan walked closer and took his own, so they both brushed their teeth and Bojan tried not to think about how domestic that felt.

That distracted him enough for him not to notice that the toothbrush was the exact same one he had at home until after he finished.

“Since when does Nace have everyone's spare toothbrush?”

“Since we all started dating?”

Bojan started at Jan through the mirror. Jan calmly washed his mouth with water. 

“I haven't been dating you.”

Jan sighed as he stood upright again and put his toothbrush back where it belonged.

“No. But even before the soulmark, you were always considered welcome. I think…on some level we all knew.”

Bojan swallowed against sudden urge to cry again. 

“I should have known. The way you looked when we saw Nace's mark, I-”

“Don't say that. You didn't know because I didn't want you to. It's not your fault.”

Jan gave him a wry smile, shaking his head.

“Isn't it? Maybe if we figured it out sooner, you wouldn't think you were unwanted. For seven years, apparently.”

Jan's emotions were more guarded than Kris’ and yet, Bojan could practically taste the bitterness and hurt pouring from him. 

Bojan couldn't help but reach for him, but as soon as he touched his arm, Jan tensed. 

“I'm sorry. It-it's not your fault, okay? I promise.”

Jan pursed his lips.

“If you say so.”

He stepped closer then closer again, until their chests were almost touching. Jan didn't stop him, but also didn't make any moves towards him, either.

Bojan cupped his face and pressed his lips to his anyway, trying to pour all his mixed feelings into it. Then Jan moved, pinning him back against the sink. Bojan gasped and Jan took that opportunity to deepen the kiss.

There was so much longing in the kiss, Bojan kept trying to pull him closer, making a protesting noise when Jan pulled back.

“This is a bad idea. We need to talk this through first.”

“Oh.”

Jan was probably right. It was not a good idea, especially with the mess of emotions Bojan was feeling. Still, it was difficult not to feel a pang of disappointment. He felt…rejected.

He nodded and hung his head low.

“Fuck. Bojan that isn't-Hey.”

Jan lifted his chin once more and Bojan shivered. Something about the gesture made Bojan feel very small in comparison. 

“I am not rejecting you. This is just because I don't want to take this too far before you feel secure in the bond, okay?”

Bojan swallowed and watched and Jan's eyes traced the movement.

“Okay.”

Jan took in a deep breath and then took a step back. Then he extended his hand out to Bojan.

“Com'on now. The others are waiting.”

Then he was tugged back into the bedroom. Jure and Kris were sitting on the bed and talking quietly, while Nace still didn't return. They went quiet once they entered and Bojan tried not to fidget.

“Don't stop on my account,” he mumbled, trying to get under the covers.

Perhaps he could suffocate himself under the blankets.

“Wait! The painkillers!”

Bojan stopped halfway, and Kris handed his the painkillers and the water. He tried not to make a face at being treated like a child. Firstly Jan with pulling back and now the rest of them eith treating him like he was fragile. They cared and objectively, he was aware he scared them last night.

So he took them and handed the glass back to Kris. Then he got under the covers and buried his face into a pillow.

“Why is he sulking?” Kris asked, directing the question at Jan.

“He kissed me and I said I don't want things to escalate until he feels comfortable with the bond.”

“He wasn't too happy about that, huh?”

Bojan was about to snap at them for talking like he wasn't there, but then another person shuffled under the covers and pulled him closer. Jure.

Jure's emotions were always on the surface and Bojan could feel them much easier than Jan's. There was a sense of deep contentment that he didn't expect.

Jure pressed a kiss into his hair and Bojan felt his annoyance begin to dissipate. Kris shuffled closer and began petting his hair and-yeah, okay, he could get used to that.

He was starting to drift when Nace came back, announcing that the pancakes were done. Bojan groggily got up, rubbing at his eyes.

“You can eat later if you are tired,” Nace said with such a soft look, Bojan felt the need to squirm.

“But I want pancakes,” he protested.

Jan laughed.

“Just let him eat. Maybe that'll wake him up.”

Bojan glared.

“Maybe now I won't go exactly because of that.”

Jan smirked.

“Well good thing we can all carry you then, no?”

“No-”

Nace crossed the room in a few steps and picked him up as if he weighed nothing. Bojan squealed. He knew Nace could pick him up, but actually being picked up was quite different.

He wrapped his arms around Nace's neck, even if he was pretty sure Nace wouldn't drop him.

“Rude,” he mumbled in his neck. 

He was lulled once again into a feeling of contentment that simply radiated from the bond. Was it supposed to feel like that? Did it always feel like that for them? 

Nace gently dropped him in a chair at the dining table. Bojan absent mindedly reached for the pancakes while the others all took their seats.

“Does it always feel like that? The bond, I mean.”

Kris cocked his head.

“How does it feel?”

“Content. Calming. Like…things clicked in place.”

Kris’ gaze softened. 

“Not quite. There was always something missing. Like the connection flowed between the four of us and then it just…hit a wall.”

“Oh.”

Bojan fidgeted with his knife before anxiously taking the jam and smearing it over the pancake. He wasn't sure what to say.

“We have been waiting for you,” Nace added softly.

And this, this was exactly what Bojan wanted to avoid. He covered his face, willing himself not to cry again.

“This is why I didn't say anything. I don't-I can't complete you.”

“You already do.”

He began shaking his head, but then Kris was gently pulling his hands away from his face.

“We already acted like you are a part of this relationship, excluding kissing and sex. You already cuddle and steal all of our clothes. You hate being alone so you are in one of our apartments half the time. You already act like you are our boyfriend, this is just a confirmation you belong with us.”

Bojan felt speechless again. So he did one thing he could think about at that moment. He kissed him.

This kiss was much softer than the one he shared with Jan. Kris kissed almost hesitantly, as if not believing he was real. When Bojan tried to press harder, someone cleared their throat and Kris pulled away.

Of course it was Jan.

“Still not a great idea Bojči,” he reminded him.

Bojan stared at Kris, who was still kneeling by his chair, looking a bit dazed.

“Maybe not such a bad idea, if it'll help convince him,” Nace said, shrugging, “But we should wait until after breakfast.”

Bojan's brain came to a screeching halt.

“C-convince me?”

Jure sighed.

“That we want you. Obviously.”

Bojan swallowed. Don't think about it. But Kris was already kneeling and-

“Kris, go sit in your chair before Bojan has another crisis. And let's just finish eating first, yeah? Then we can discuss other things.”

He felt his cheeks heat at Jan's words and Jure chuckled. Kris simply rolled his eyes and went to take his seat.

They all began to eat and Bojan just tried to take everything in as they fell into easy conversation like nothing had happened.

His world tilted on its axis and…kept spinning, almost exactly the same as it had before. And surely, this would change things. Perhaps even his fears would be confirmed with time.

But for now, Bojan sat with four of his soulmates that he loved more than anyone else and simply let himself breathe.

Bojan was born with four stripes on his stomach. Yellow, red, purple and blue. And for the first time, his pink joined into the rainbow it created.