#im half awake rn guys

[lesbianturrets]

Hi gm I burnt myself trying to nair my armpits it hurts so bad

[dizzybizz]

he's so real for this

[bopero]

contains: lazy days in with bf!hamzah

You awake to an empty bed, Red and Blue occupying the spot that your boyfriend usually takes. They meow as you stretch, good mornings in their own language and comforting you through your lazy awakening. They sweetly chirp at you when you ask where your boyfriend is, as if they’d ever be able to answer.

Rising out of the white sheets, Hamzah’s shirt practically swallows you whole. He’d long since given it to you, insisting that it looked much better on you when you had tried to give it back. Usually you’d hear your other half’s grumbles of disdain and the click-clack of his keyboard as he edits, but today you smell the rousing scent of eggs and toast.

You hear the coffee maker going, which finally brings you out of the sleep-addled stupor you’re in. As your feet pad through the hallway the cats follow you, now wide awake at the smell of food. You hear them reach the kitchen before you as they start meowing, Hamzah’s grumbles of ‘no, fatty’ and ‘get away’ bringing a soft, content smile to your face. You’ll round the corner and see your boys, and there’s nothing more you really need.

You spot his curly head of hair at the stove, swatting away orange paws as he tries to juggle multiple things at once. He’s still in his pajamas, humming songs you don’t know with your Hello Kitty themed spatula in hand (the one he said he’d never use when you’d moved in together.)

Hamzah jumps when he feels your cold hand on his big shoulder, “God! Don’t sneak up on a guy like that, almost knocked you out,”

You hum lazily, entranced by the good-looking food on the pan, “I’d like to see you try,”

He snorts, as if your challenge is nothing to him, “Yeah, yeah, go get some plates. Made you breakfast,”

You move on instinct, already accustomed to the pattern of your shared home. Hamzah makes an exaggerated sound of satisfaction as he licks excess of his finger, teasing the cats that sit meowing on the counter. You shake your head at his ridiculousness, but can’t help but find it adorable.

Hamzah’s biceps flex under the tight shirt he wears as he scoops some food onto your plate, “Why are you up so early today? I thought you were working,”

He puts the pan away, sitting next to you at the dining table (he likes to sit right next to you rather than across. as close as he can be to you.) savoring the food and finding pride in himself as you give him an approving look.

He speaks through bites, “Nah, I finished everything yesterday. Gotta make some free time for my girl,”

You live together, but when he refers to you as his, it sends shivers of exhilaration through you. You still feel like he’s a dream, a floaty feeling enveloping you every time he looks at you. That’s just love, you suppose.

“So you’re all mine today?”

Hamzah sends you a love struck smile. A gentle one matched with the tiniest, cutest red flush on his face, “Yep. All yours.”

note: please send requests!! im so obsessed rn. currently working on a best friends to lovers fic for him :)

[archangeldyke-all]

im dying for a little (Consensual!!) somno with sevika 🙏🙏

honk shoo.... honk shoo... oh i'm sleeping so soundly rn i hope a big sexy lesbian doesn't take advantage of me... honk shoo...

men and minors dni

you guys had fallen asleep spooning while watching cartoons on your laptop.

sevika blinks awake about three hours later. the cartoons are still blasting so she reaches out and slams the laptop shut before wrapping her arm back around your waist.

she nuzzles into your neck. you smell so good-- like soap and sleep and skin. sevika hums against you, closing her eyes to go back to sleep.

you're so warm in her arms, soft little sighs escaping your lips as you snooze beside sevika. she sighs in satisfaction, her breath tickling your neck causing you to grunt and shift in your sleep, your ass pressing against sevika's crotch.

she sucks a breath in between her teeth, her eyes snapping back open. fuck.

fuck.

now she wants you. she was perfectly content going back to sleep two seconds ago, but now with your ass pressing deliciously against her, she's wide awake and raring to go.

she gently rolls you onto your stomach as she rolls her eyes at herself, at how fucking needy she is for you. your body is pliant under her, moving easily as she pushes your shoulder.

she straddles your thighs and shoves your pajama pants down, grinning when your ass is revealed to her. you huff in your sleep, and she freezes-- waiting for two minutes for your soft snores to return before she starts fondling your ass with her hands.

she takes a few minutes to simply admire you. she spreads your ass cheeks, gets a good look at your cunt and hole, then lets go, giggling at the way your ass jiggles. she watches in fascination as your cunt slowly starts glistening-- your body reacting to her touch while your mind is still off in dream land.

fuck, she loves you. she loves you so much. she leans down to press a gentle kiss to your mouth, smiling at the happy little twitch of your lips as your subconscious reacts to the familiar sensation. then, she leans back down your body, spreading your legs and kneeling between them.

she takes a moment to simply admire her view-- your clit poking out between your wet folds, your ass in her hands-- then she leans forward and licks a long stripe up your cunt.

your breath comes out as a shudder, but your body doesn't move. sevika grins, then she dives face first into your cunt and ass, eating you out like a woman starved.

she's not worried about waking you up anymore, her hands clawing into your ass and her tongue slurping at the arousal that leaks from your cunt. all she's worried about is tasting you, and the sweet way your little hole clenches around nothing.

she chuckles against you as you start to twitch, slurping your clit into her mouth when you moan out a half asleep "mmmsev?"

"cum in my mouth." she whispers against you. you don't hear it, you're still dreaming.

sevika nips at your thigh and you snap awake. "sevika!?" you gasp. she chuckles between your legs and continues to lick you up. "fuck!" you exclaim as you cum, shaking against sevika's quick tongue and plush lips. she hums happily against you, licking up your cum as you sleepily grind your hips against her face.

when you stop twitching, she pulls away from your cunt with a gasp, smacking your ass lovingly as she rises to hover over you as you flop onto your back, then pressing her lips against yours.

you hum into her mouth, licking sevika's lips clean of your cum. "g'morning." you say with a sleepy grin. she smiles at you.

"still the middle of the night." you raise an eyebrow at her and she giggles, shrugging.

"i couldn't help it! had to have you." she says sweetly, gently tracing your cheek with her thumb. you lean forward to press a kiss to her lips, your hands coming up to hook over her shoulders, your legs wrapping around her thighs.

"you know... since you woke me up it's your responsibility to put me back to sleep." you say as you bat your eyes up at sevika, slowly pulling her closer and closer to your body. she grins. "got any ideas on how you could wear me out?" you ask.

she answers your question with a kiss as one of her hands rips open the nightstand drawers in search of the lube.

taglist!

@lesbeaniegreenie @fyeahnix @sapphicsgirl @half-of-a-gay @ellabslut @thesevi0lentdelights @sexysapphicshopowner @shimtarofstupidity

[oceanwithouthermoon]

OKAY im posting this crappy wip kubosai one-shot because ive been lagging severely on writing... sorry if its cringe, its completely unedited rn</3

this is roughly 1800 words.. the actual wip is about 4000 LOL but i skipped a couple parts so this is about half the wip i guess..

Kusuo was sitting at his desk with his legs curled to his chest, glaring at nothing, when his phone dinged next to him. Already not in the best mood, he sneered as his eyes snapped over to the device. The noise had disturbed one of his favorite pastimes; being moody for no reason and doing nothing, and the bright light was equally disturbing. When he looked over, it also shone the time as "1:36am" which ruined his blissful unawareness of how long he'd been brooding. His unusually accurate internal clock could have told him that, really, but Kusuo would never pass up an opportunity to be mad about something stupid.

His eyes softened significantly when he caught sight of what the notification actually was. A text from contact name "Kuboyasu Aren" with no contact picture. Yeah, that was how Kusuo kept all his contacts. Super boring and super normal.

He clenched his teeth, trying to bring his anger from before back after realizing how much and how easily his mood lifted just reading his classmate's name.

His phone had gone back to a black screen before Kusuo could read the actual contents of the message, so he begrudgingly unfurled himself from his position with a heavy sigh. He planted his feet back on the floor just a bit too aggressively and swiped up his phone as he stomped over to his bed to flop himself down on it.

When he finally turned his phone back on, the notification read “3m ago” and he clicked on it.

The message read, “hey princess when u wake up do u wanna hangout ??!? could i come overrr tomorrow please”

Annoying lack and misuse of punctuation, but Kusuo has learned that this tends to be the norm in texting, especially with other teenagers. In all fairness, the way Kusuo texts isn't very conventional either. He made fun of Toritsuka’s severe overuse of emojis once, and then immediately got ganged up on by all of the self proclaimed ‘PK psychickers’ because he tends to overuse emoticons in the same way. He doesn't know how else to express himself over text, alright? He learned to text only from his mom, Akechi, and Aiura and this is just how it turned out.

And for your information, the stupid princess pet name was just some silly thing Kuboyasu had gotten in the habit of doing lately. Trust Kusuo when he says it's much more embarrassing when he says it out loud, especially at school, than when he texts it, though knowing that his name in Kuboyasu’s contacts was “My Princess :)” was probably even worse.

Anyway, Kuboyasu had clearly made the assumption that Kusuo would be sleeping at this hour. Well, usually he would be. Kusuo LOVES getting his sleep in, but he just so happened to have taken a very long nap earlier that day, so he had a late dinner, and subsequently a late dessert. So, his usually abnormally fast metabolism hadn't quite been rid of all the sugar and caffeine he'd consumed not long ago. A series of unfortunate events, really, which culminated in him not being tired enough to sleep yet. At least he got to get in his usual ‘angrily staring at nothing for no reason’ time that he accidentally skipped because of his nap, although that did just get interrupted too.

So finally, he responded to Kuboyasu with, “I'm awake. (-.-;) Sure, I guess.”

Kuboyasu read the message and began typing unnervingly quickly after it was sent. “really ?!?!? also y r u awake lol i thought u would be asleep hours ago”

The poor guy probably wasn't expecting him to say yes immediately. Kusuo usually would argue about it for a bit before giving in to the teasing and pleading of his self proclaimed friends. It was way too late (/early) to play that game right now though, he knew he would just say yes in the end anyway. It had nothing to do with him actually wanting to see the dumb former punk who he had been unusually close with lately.

The taller boy just GOT him in a way other people never did. His undying loyalty and honesty was a refreshing contrast from many of the other people the psychic was often forced to be around. Loyal, honest, strong, romantic, protective. Not that those last few things affected the way he interacted with Kusuo or anything…

Kusuo replied again, “Yes. And I usually would be, but… too much caffeine. (￣^￣)”

Another quick response, “lol thats totally something u would do.. since ur up, r u down to call right now ?”

“To call? It's almost 2am. ಠ_ಠ Why are YOU awake anyway?”

“lol i know i know but im so bored… i just cant sleep.. we can be quiet on the call, but id like to hear ur voice right now :)”

Good grief, ew. How disgusting. “Hm… okay. ∩(｡-_-｡)∩”

(Don't you dare ask Kusuo why his internal monologue is so different from what he actually replies with. It's definitely not because he's an unreliable narrator who doesn't want to admit to himself or anyone that he actually wants to talk to a boy. Why would that be the case? Don't be dumb.)

Kusuo forgot to turn his ringer off before Kuboyasu could call him, so despite entirely expecting the phone call, the loud ringing startled him into dropping his phone on his face. How embarrassing, all-powerful psychic drops his phone on his face at almost 2am.

He scrambled to pick it back up and answer it so that the noise wouldn't wake up his parents. It would be really easy for him to just lull them back to sleep with his telepathy the second they wake up, but it would be inconvenient and his dad might complain in the morning. About either remembering waking up or just about not getting a good night’s sleep.

He finally clicked the answer button, luckily before his parents could wake up, and held back a sigh as he held the phone up to his ear.

“Hey, princess!” Kuboyasu was speaking in a whisper yell, probably also a room away from his sleeping parents.

“Hello.” He tried to speak in a way that wouldn't give away the fact that he was recovering from a smack to the face. Phone calls were a bit awkward for Kusuo, since microphones didn't pick up on his telepathy so he had to use his actual voice to speak over the phone. He always just hoped people wouldn't notice the extra rasp to his voice, but the late hour might work in his favor in this situation.

“So what have you been up to?”

“Nothing.”

“Nothing? Up at 2 am and you're just sitting there, doing nothing?”

“Yes, that's exactly what I've been doing. What else is there to do at 2am?”

“Well, I've been making the most of MY time, personally.”

“And how have you been doing that, exactly?”

“Thinkin’ about you.”

“...”

“...”

“... *snort*” Okay, how could that NOT make him laugh? He took the phone slightly away from his face and laughed into his hand.

“What?? It's true!” The idiot couldn't hold back his laughter either.

“Yeah, yeah, okay… whatever, you're such a pain…”

“Yeah? Am I?”

“Yes.”

“And yet, you're here talking to me at 2 am just because I asked you to? Admit it, you love it.”

“Tch. You really need to get over yourself, you know that?”

“Well. Humor me for a bit longer, will you?”

“You're desperate.”

“For you.”

Kusuo muttered into his hand, “Oh my god.”

“I wish I could see your face right now, I know you're blushing.”

“Yeah, right. Not like you can prove that.”

“You want me to?”

“What do you mean?”

“You want me to come over there and check?”

Kusuo could hear the smirk in Kuboyasu’s voice. The jerk knew Kusuo couldn't say no to him. They both knew this game. Kusuo would deny him just for show, even though they both know he wants to say yes, and Kuboyasu would tease the truth out of him. Well, fine. Kusuo could play this game.

“You want to sneak out of your house and into mine at 2am just so you can check how successful your teasing is?”

“Mhm. Not just that, I would do anything to see my pretty princess’ face right now. I'm bored, you're bored, the only solution is for the knight to rescue the princess from this ailment, obviously.”

“You're an idiot.”

“You want to see me, I know it.” And he did. Kusuo could hear shuffling over the phone. That asshole was probably already putting his shoes on, knowing Kusuo would say yes. “What, you scared to prove me right? You don't want me to see your pretty pink face right now?”

… Kuboyasu was good at this game. He knows that husky voice is fucking irresistible. To Kusuo, at least. “... Okay, okay. Only so I can prove you WRONG.”

He knew Kuboyasu was smiling, but then the mood settled a bit. “You serious, Saiki? I know I'm messing with you, but I won't pressure you if you don't wanna sneak me in. I mean, that's kinda a lot to ask now that I'm thinkin’ about it. I really wanna see you, but I wouldn't make you do that.”

“Yeah, yeah, shut up, I've already made up my mind. Are YOU sure? You realize how late and dark it is, yeah? You can't just stroll the streets at 2 am, you're gonna get hurt.”

“Awee, you worried about me, princess? No need, your knight in shining armor can protect himself just fine.”

"... Fine. Just stay on the phone with me."

"Hm? While I walk?"

He figured Kuboyasu wouldn't want to have a conversation over the phone in favor of paying attention to his surroundings, but... Kusuo couldn't help but be nervous about his friend's safety at this hour. He just wanted to make sure he was fine the whole walk.

"We don't have to talk, just... stay on the phone with me..."

Kuboyasu snorted. "What, you gonna miss me in those, what, ten whole minutes?"

Kusuo scoffed quietly. "Don't be so full of yourself. I'm just making sure you don't trip and fall or something at 2am on the way to my house. Wouldn't want the blame to fall back on me." He somehow still managed to convey snark in his almost monotone voice despite his whisper.

Kuboyasu chuckled softly, as he snarked back teasingly, "You know I can take care of myself. Can't believe you're still worried about me~."

Kusuo did know that. It didn't change anything. And he WASN'T worried, he just knew that his various nuisances tended to get into trouble when he wasn't there to monitor them. He was always getting them out of trouble even in broad daylight, so there was absolutely no reason to think that walking alone in the middle of the night would prove to be an exception.

"Just shut up and don't hang up, alright?"

He heard the quiet creak of a door closing and shutting, barely drowning out Kuboyasu’s attempt at muffling his laughter. "Alright, sweet boy. I'm right here."

-

EWWWW CRINGEE EW THEY HAVE COOTIES

[beautifulmindset111]

Heyyy guys this is my first post today im going to try to enter the void state with the lullaby method! I’ve been procrastinating for way too long and me,sister and my nephew are about get kicked out our home in 9 days !!! So I will be updating u guys on my progress !!! Please comment any tips for focusing!!!!!!!

Day 1- I listened to some brown noise for 13 mins and laid down in a my regular position (on my side) started affirming not for the void state but that my sister had 10k dollars to pay for the late rent bcuz I felt like I needed to that so we can have stable housing then the void state comes along. i turned the brown noise off and tried to just fall asleep naturally and affirm I feel asleep and I affirmed but not I fall asleep anyways , I kept waking up and I just affirmed and affirmed then at 4 something am I got into sats I think and I said I am in the void state and I am I started feeling symptoms like tingling I can’t really explain it but instead I should’ve kept affirming the thing I was affirming before ( aka my sister has 10k dollars) but thats basically it I’ll keep update of any other resultss ❤️! one more thing I think I’m gonna stay awake until I get very drowsy like half asleep half awake or sats something like that .

Final update: I didn’t get into the void state butttt WE ARE NOTT GETTING EVICTED!!!

Btw I will trying a new method to get into the void state! Im using yoga Nidra! And since I don’t know how to link the posts involved with it. you can look in my liking section it will be there!! I tried the meditation rn and it worked like a charm but I opened my eyes bcuz I forgot I had to affirm so I will be making a journey/progress post rn !!! I have so much faith in this method I know this method is going to work for me like NOTHING I MEAN NOTHING NO ONE CAN TELL ME THIS WONT WORK FOR ME LITERALLY THATS HOW I FEEL STRONGLY AND FIRMLY I AM GOING TO GAVE THAT DREAM LIFE NOBODY CAN TELL ME NOTHINGHGG. 😭a lil moment but yea this works so fast so im def going into the void with method and u can too it’s fast and it’s easy I wasted soo much freaking time on doing nothing and now im fed tf uppp so my plan is to try at 5:00 am before school I get to go to school at 10:00 so I have ALOT of time!!! I been seeing 444 1111 and numbers like that for so long and this is my final push. This is my moment to SHINE BRIGHT LIKE A DIAMOND ( in rihannas angelic voice😌💅🏾) I AMM SOOO FREAKING READYYY FOR THIS IM READY FOR A CHANGE NOW I GAVE BEEN SETTLING FOR LESS FOR TOO DAMN LONG I NEEEDDDDD TO ACHIEVE BAD BTCH NOT TAKING SHII FROM ANYONE TYPE GIRL TO COMR OUT OF MEEE! I NEED TO SHIFTT TO MY WR AND MY FAME DR TO GO TO POUNDTOWN WUTH MY VERY WEALTHY SWEET CARING HUSBAND AND I WANT TO SEE MY BABIEESSS IM GOING TO SMUGGLE THEM WHEN I SEE THEM FRFR IM SHIFTING TO THE TIME I WAS 5 MONTHS WITH MYLO (my son the youngest 🥺💙) BROOO IM SOO FLIPPING HAPPY RN ALL HIGH VIBRATIONS ❤️❤️❤️I CAN WAIT TIL I GO INTO THE VOID IM GOING TO TELL U GUYS EVERYTHING RIGHT I SAY WHAT I WANNA MANIFEST IM STRAIGHT SHIFTING TO MY WR INTO FAME DR I HAVE TWO MY MESSY FDR AND MY NORMAL FDR IM GOING THE NORM ONE FIRST. I HAVE SO MANY DRS IM JUST GONNA GO TO MY FDR AND TELL U GUYS SO MANY STORIES BRO IM GOING TO HAVE A FCKING BLAST. LIKE I RLLY NEED THIS BREAK RN (srry for the captions 😭) bcuz i js rlly need to yk get from all the bs happening with my family in general I feel so unappreciated I try my best but it never seems good enough for them. My sister makes me feels like im a burden to her so im js gonna manifest me a dad and leave I’ll still communicate with her I js don’t feel like i want to LIVE with her yk she got my nephew and that’s all she could handle our mother rlly js messed us up. Im js tremendously grateful i stumbled upon manifesting & shifting now i can change my life for the better i can heal finally and truly be myself i can literally travel to any reality to ANYWHERE AND BE ANYTHING I want to. I CAN DO ANYTHING I know I have the power to do it ik it’s within me im going to shoot for freaking stars now.

[churomo]

YEAH yeah definitely (chiscara anon again. i KNOW!) i agree with u in that sense, i dont really hc them buddybuddy, but its an occasional thought i enjoy entertaining u know.. if they Were to get into any form of close relation (romantically) while in the fatui I think it would be kinda like that….? private, very private and covered up. because no matter how I look at fatui chscr i just think yeah they fight. but i think they are kinda drawn to each other even if the romantic feelings arent like acknowledged or THERE, there's somethn they feel is magnetic about the other I guess ttttt IDK HOW TO EXPLAIN THIS. I feel like in scaras case with that he doesnt know why he's drawn to React to childe but he does and wells it up to him being super fucking annoying a nuisance ett, while childe's like, idk. interested…? in him??? confused? enraptured??mr. "this guy's gonna give me the fight of a lifetime!" i dont like the overly fight-obsessed childe content to the point where that's all he's watered down to, but it's obvious he is looking for a Challenge. and "wow, look, a mysterious more-powerful-than-he-seems and higher ranked man is soooo perfectly (I forgot the word i was gonna use my bad) in my line of work". a lot of my actual thoughts on chscr come from the individual characters' Personality or like Story NOT backgrounds, just how they are. voicelines???? Anything about them sorry im like half awake rn. for fatui-era chscr i just dont really imagine them intrrested in each other like that, but they are like enamored maybe. idk if that's the right word HELP. fatuimouche seems very out of touch and hardly informed on the reality of humanity and childe is There n so very human and Alive. familyman. Personality-filled. animated. idk. to me it feels like an "i whatever you" SORRY THIS WAS A SENSELESS RANT BUT I HOPE U CAN LIKE PICK UP WHAT IM PUTTING DOWN

tried to answer this on cell data a few days ago and it didn’t save my reply aaa

but i am infact picking up what ur putting down chscr anon!!! fatui scara is so messy and his general… everything really just rolls off of him in waves esp when it comes to his relationships

looking at it objectively their personalities r… very different. which makes it fun! i get what youre saying wwww and weve seen how childe behaves around his coworkers (liyue arc, lazzo trailer) and i think that makes it even more fascinating. they just clash objectively, and yet i think theres a sorta mutual something that prevents them from killing e/o. what is it? they dont know but theyre also too stubborn to put a name to it. tho i think scara wld think back to it once hes wanderer and go “oh… oh fuck”

[cainightfics]

can we get an update? are u doing ok? u had such crazy output last year and now u so suddenly stopped

hey! ya sorry i went so mia its been a busy year. im still working on fic but its slow. from when i last updated trotw to april i was working 3 jobs, taking a full uni courseload, and writing my thesis. the thesis in particular honestly burned me out on writing really badly but i did manage to write that one oneshot

then summer was just shit honestly lol. i spent the entire summer working at a restaurant to save up money bc i had to move away in september, and the shift i had started at 6am, so i was almost never awake during my peak writing hours (11pm to 3am). i lost 30lbs in 2 months partially because i was broke and partially because my eating disorder relapsed (probably from stress lol). during that time i was only eating one meal a day in the form of my free staff lunch at work, but the restaurant where i worked was INFESTED WITH MICE :))))) so half the time i was too disgusted to eat thinking there might be rodent shit mixed into my food lol. and then on my days off i just ate like eggs and rice and zucchini bc thats what i got from the food bank. in august i started really genuinely and consciously restricting my calories down to like 500-800 cals per day, plus working on my feet as a waitress doing like 20k steps a day as a result of the malnutrition and rapid weight loss my hair started falling out in massive clumps :))) and i started sleeping for like 12 hrs a day. im eating properly now ofc tho

i moved in september for grad school and am now living in one of the most expensive cities in the world lol so i spend a lot of time just financially struggling. i have a job that will last until the end of december but its under contract so i only make like $600 a month and have to rely on my $14k school stipend and meagre savings for the rest. ive been looking for another job but i either get no interview, have the interviewer ghost me, or most recently, get told i have the job and then just never get scheduled. i have 7 cents in my checking account rn lol. my rent is paid until next month and then after that who knows whats gonna happen to me

last years output was definitely a fluke and only happened bc i was VERYYYY financially stable and could fuck around a lot at my part time job, where i wrote most of trotw. those sunny days are gone 🚬🚬 lol but i dont intend to abandon my works and i promise they will come someday. if anyone here feels like paying my rent itll come EVEN faster!!!

thx for checking up tho, its nice to know i havent been totally forgotten by u guys <3

[night-shadowblood-writes2]

Greatest Treasure

Chapter 1

The first 3 to 4 chapters are taking place before the first episode of dungeon meshi. This is a chilchuck x oc story he's a little nicer rn because this was when they were younger.

I don't remember much really. All my life my family has lived the nomadic life. Never staying in one place long I seen and met all types of people and heard all types of wild claims.

But I'm now 10 I was able to set off from my family a young half foot like myself was ready to make my way out into the world. And so far it's been good. A bit rough some people have their opinions of my kind but I've also heard opinion of their kind.

I'm currently in Kahka Brud I was picked up by an awfully nice old man he let me ride in the back of his cart until the we reached the next village.

"We are here miss!" He says looking back at me. I smiled and hopped off the cart, "thank you so much for the ride mister!" I called back happily going to the front of the cart and pulling out my cash bag but he waved me off. "No need for that I was already passing by keep it you might need it for something else." He smiled. I couldn't help but grin back and ask, "Are you sure?"

"Yes yes off you go get now" he swatted the air playfully before moving along. "Bye bye!" I waved before heading into the village. It looked really cute a little small but cute.

It was then that I saw a beautiful meadow and ran to it, laying on the ground I watched the clouds roll by the breeze was gentle the warm sun not tok bright just enough to feel nice and the sounds were nice too I couldn't help but doze off. How was I supposed to know I'd meet my soulmate the love of my life the boy who would own my heart years later still? How was I to know he'd give me my greatest treasure.

I felt a hand shake me awake it was gentle yet firm. My eyes open to see a boy with redish brown hair and brown eyes looking down at me with a look of worry yet caution.

"Huh didn't know I could dream up such a handsome boy.." I mutter but unfortunately our ears are too good and his face flushed red. "W-what are you talking about? Who are you I haven't see you around before?"

"I'm Izzybel Valz I'm a wanderer.." I say as I sit up. "Who are you?" I mutter sleepily. "I'm Chilchuck Tims nice to meet you. Ive heard anout you guys before! The nomadic kind who travel everywhere and dont stay in one spot right?"

I nod this guy was easy to talk to "nice to meet you Chilchuck Tims. Im not here to cause troublei just wanted to redt a bit."

"Well this is a lousy place to rest we have a inn not too far from here." He says. "Really?! Can you show me were please" I could help but smile at him cute and helpful he keeps getting better and better.

Chilchuck smiles back and nods holding out a hand which I grabbed while he assisted me up. I held his hand as he showed me the way telling me a few thing about this cute village. I had a feeling I was going to love it here.

I didn't know however that this boy was my true love and that in this meadow under a bright blue sky is were everything would turn upside down and all around yet what I also didn't know was that the boy also had a part of me in his heart too. Locked up sealed good and tight, these memories and feelings were locked away to protect his heart which yearned for its other half.

We had locks on our hearts but the keys were in the others hand waiting patiently to be opened again.

[nightguide]

Long time no see, guys♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

HERES YOUR ASTRO WEEKLY, IM LINNA SHAHEEN ALSO KNOWN AS THE LADY BEHIND MY TWITTER ACC @sapphiresend AN IMMA DELIVER U THE TRUTH CUZ Y’ALL BE FCKED WITHOUT ME

ASTROLOGY WEEKLY 3/03/24

🌞 🌜JUPITER

Aries ☀️🌙 Jupiter

Just be okay with being who you are, Jupiter expands on who you are as a person but like the fiery sign that you are, expand your heart, dominant mars sign doesn’t back tf out, you need to be expressed as you dream of being cuz the nasty mf ain’t turning back soon, fight with fury if you have to, Taurean Jupiter says, ‘hey, just know you can always ask for more, you working heart to heart is only taking other people to win for your mercy so practice gratitude cuz a great summer spent with Aphrodite is spent with great heart’, rip em all out for the win Aries😘💋

Taurus ☀️🌙 Jupiter

Give em the glitz, give em the glamour cuz the radiant spotlight breaks the energy created for the world accumulated on your half, cuz what the actual fuck are you going to do with what you have already, spend time contemplating the world guiding to broken eras you changed into cuz the dawn of the earths breast-giver isn’t going to break corners soon enough for coronets to form crowns in your heart (this is pisces mercury for ‘if you lose the world then you have no chance in existing. Broken full stops doesn’t let you talk but broken full stops doesn’t make you lose a full fight cuz nobody talks back the way you do, just act like you know what you’re doing cuz the world ain’t literally ending, stop the Neo bullshit cuz probably the actor irl is facing severe trauma to the world he accidentally manipulated to nothing

Gemini ☀️🌙 Jupiter

Can’t talk to you rn cuz you’re probably the worst of the air signs rn to face the truth but probably you have to talk in broken english to understand a butterfly’s broken wings, you will make your heart cry and the last thing i want you to do is die

Cancer ☀️🌙 Jupiter

You can cry, it’s okay, 🙂 you can make your heart cry, you know you’re okay🥹🥹🥹

Leo ☀️🌙 Jupiter

You can lose in a fight but steam isn’t solid, be careful when you’re thinking too much cuz you’re more caveman than you are cuz a ball of fire is what leads you to getting burned

Virgo ☀️🌙 Jupiter

You have no idea how much you have the time of law of gravity of space time bullshit to understand the gravity of your heart cuz the motherfuckin sign likes to dance with no gun, like imagine a child going through a slow and gory death, yeah, that’s the condition of your heart rn. Think about that

Libra ☀️🌙 Jupiter

You can only be yourself as long as the world will continue to breathe but God fckin damn you if you want to play fight your cousins sixth keg of beer to forget the universe to lie awake in your aunty’s house the second day of your life to think what the hell is spectrum, like it’s a retarded disorder but get this, smoke weed and pretend that everything is okay, either that or hang out specifically with your air sign besties, they will stop your from zoning out into oblivion cuz God fucking damn you and your empty trying times that you forgot a forlorn conspiracy theory best friend who told you the world is going to cook AND YOU BELIEVED THEM??!? WHERE THE FUUCKK IS YOUR COMMON SENSE, LIKE YOUR HOMELY DREAMS ARE COMING UP MAD AND SUDDENLY THE WORLD WILL FRY INTO YOUR ICE CREAM SANDWICH BAKED AND FRIED INTO YESTERDAYS BURGER BASTARD ABOMINATION YOU SANG LAST NIGHT, LITTLE TOO LATE TO WATCH SAUSAGE PARTY WITHOUT GETTING TOLD OFF BY SETH ROGEN THAT YOU’RE THE REASON WHY ITS MADE, LIKE BITCH GET LAID

Scorpio ☀️🌙 Jupiter

‘Tell me what you want, what you like it’s okay, i can keep a secret, can, you’ but pretend you don’t have a partner to crush into, like how fckin amazing is ur life with them in it without them actively being in it, you’re literally crushing on them in real time and they notice you, girlboss, manifest, mansplain, man do, monkey ur shitty arse off if you’re in love and pretty much the vibe of that song here is your energy you would give to that God or Goddess or ‘if’ ‘it’ ze-zir homo ur in love with

Sagittarius ☀️🌙 Jupiter

THOTS, WAKE UR BIGGGGGGGGG TITTIES AN SHIT ON UR HEART U FORGOTTEN ASSLESS GODS

Capricorn ☀️🌙 Jupiter

🪐🪐💖🌼🤩👶🌌♓️💖♓️🌜👶👶🌙😭👶👶🥰👶😆👶😭🥲🥰👶💋👶🥲🌌🥲🥰💋😭👶🥰👶🤩♓️♓️♓️🌞🌺🌺🌌🌹👶😆

ITS A BEAUTIFUL DREAM, HAPPI SATURNIAN U R, YES U R😀😃👶 DONT WOWWY ABOUT TH FUTUR, YES U TOO 😃CUTE😃 TO EXIST, U 2 CUTE TO EXIST👶👶👶👶👶👶👶👶

Aquarius ☀️🌙 Jupiter

🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻

💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦

🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖😘😘😘😘😘😘😘

🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺

🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌🌌

♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️

👶👶👶👶👶👶👶👶👶👶👶👶👶👶👶👶

🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

Mama is here, don’t worry😃☺️😊

Mama says u too cute, Mama says u r so lovd u r too cute, b urself🌟⭐️💫✨🥹🥰 i love u, byeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Pisces ☀️🌙 Jupiter

HI GUYS U R CUTE AND THE WORLD IS TOO BEAUTIFUL 4 U, HERE HAVE A FLOWER🌺 I LOVE YOU HONEY, SUGAR AN CUTE HEARTS TO HEARTBREAK

[fagcrisis]

im half asleep and i dont know why im sending you this ask specifically i think its bc you were the first person on my dash but anyway once i watched atsv i was to do a drawing thats the spider guys but like a Hieronymus Bosch painting like the graden of earthly delights but its all spider people it would take very long to draw. what do you think of this idea do you love it. im not sure if im awake or not rn

DO IT ITD BE SOOOOO COOL

[dizzybizz]

Hiiii omg this is so silly and I looooove your bd art but my bestie and I are obsessed with your ouppy???? (Congrats on obtaining the ouppy!!!!!)

We gave ouppy a hat and all we did in the past few days was sending this picture back and forth???? Like our chat is literally just ouppy?????

Ouppy is my source of serotonin during dark times like this please

this is everything to me actually omg??

thank you for telling me-

------

ok hold up i am running on barely 5 hours of shitty sleep bc one of our cats just had to run outside for a few minutes at like 3am just to come back with a mouse and run around the house screaming- she was laying in my bed and then ran off, was gone for a little while and then i hear her obnoxious meowing from downstairs and so i called for her- and she runs up and goes straight under my bed and i just go "oh no, what do you have this time-" well a fucking mouse is what-

ok wait- this day has been so fucking disastrous?? do yall mind if i scream about it for a bit???? sorry that im using your ask to rant but omfg, you'll get ouppy content dw

it was a five hour drive at fucking 6:30 and i have been half asleep the entire day

and my dad drove to the wrong address, and then managed to get us stuck in the fucking snow??? so we spent an extra hour freeing the car with the help of the people who lived there, they were really nice but their kids were watching from the window for a while and it was lowkey really unsettling lmao

OK BUT LIKE THE FUCKING STRUGGLE THAT WAS GETTING THE CAGE IN ORDER NOOO IT WAS AWFUL,,,, i dont want to think about it

also on our way home we were on a road with no streetlights for a while except it was really foggy so it just looked surreal- it was basically a gray gradient with no definition and since i was barely awake i thought it was real before realizing "oh wait its just fog,,, im really tired huh"

-----

hi sorry about that i really badly need to sleep rn but i have some ouppy content first

here he is at his og home:

here he is in my dads arms, he looks so eepyyyy:

on the way home:

idonthavemanypicsaight

hes the biggest of his litter and second born

two pups of that litter ended up white despite the parents being black and brown?????

he had been at home for an hour and he managed to shit once and piss twice,, all on different carpets too,,,, i am so eager for when he is potty trained oml

he has met 3/4 of our cats, everyone involved is very hesitant

he has claimed a bed already, and it just so happens to be the fave of 2 of our cats,,,, sorry guys omg

he loses his goddamn mind when you lay down on your back, hes all up in your face immediately... its so adorable 🥺🥺🥺

he.

[nardonotes]

7 nov '24

6:45am

this is basically an entry for the 6th because damn... I CANT EVEN RMBR WHAT I DID!!! but i didn't sleep until 5pm (after class!) cause i was awake the night before like.... my sleep is so fucked (っ- ‸ - ς).. i ended up cancelling on the guy and the photoshoot and rainchecked for friday instead because i was too fucking tired like actually i was so wrecked.. and i just didn't feel like it either. i had too much to worry about and i had a long day of class (WHICH I WENT TO! ALL OF MY CLASSES TOO!!)

anyways,, i woke up at 1am because oomf called me :D and then we called for till now lol, it's actually 8am now,, i wrote the first half before i got distracted lol..

anyways,, i ate after i played APEX WHICH LEMME RANT REAL QUICK ABOUT!!1 ( ｡ •̀ ᴖ •́ ｡) so season 23 of apex rn is literally OG APEX. THEY BROUGHT BACK EVERYTHING FROM LIKE THE BEGINNING OF APEX BC THE GAME IS DYING!!!! and it's fun and forces me to play battle royale bc THERE'S LITERALLY NOTHING ELSE TO PLAY BUT BR OR RANKED. THEY GOT RID OF ALL THE MODES. AND I CAN'T EVEN PLAY FUSE BECAUSE THERE'S ONLY A FEW LEGENDS U CAN PLAY.. sickening.... but anyways. it's still fun i guess... i just hope throughout the season,, they add more things. or im literally gna barely play this season and this will be apex's last chance... (╥‸╥)

i have class at 11am today, im gna go and then imma go to the post office and then HEAD HOME!!!!!!! and sleep. :DD good morning !! type to ya later :33

song of the day: Replay by SHINee (´▽`)

[icefireanimates]

if this comes off rudely im sorry im half awake n u dont have to answer it publicly but like

dude stop fixating on that youtuber, bc thats literally what youre doing rn even if you hate the guy... its like.. mildly unhealthy at this point

ik he sucks but you can block him and move on and never have to think abt him again

but like.. playing a game he played a few times bc you wanted to see how weird he possibly was..? thats fucking weird and you kinda need to quit it

thing is i need something else and i have been desperately searching for something and have not found it. which is annoying me. but now im kinda satisfied because i put everything into words

so it should be fucking over at this point.

i would like you to know that although it seems unhealthy, this is how i get over shit. you just gotta let it happen. if i keep the hate i have inside me THAT’S what’ll be unhealthy for me. i NEED to say something or ill just become bitter.

finding shit out about this guy is helping me in fact, that’s why i joined that game. i wanted one chance to see if he would talk and he didn’t. so its over. that’s all i wanted know, and i got my answer.

[riminiscensce]

FRIENDSHIP BRACELETS

CHARACTERS … akaashi keiji , bokuto kotaro , hoshiumi korai , kozume kenma

SYNOPSIS ... their crush (you) made them friendship bracelets!

NOTES ... OHHH WRITING FOR HAIKYUU I MISS IT!!! (srry i'm half asleep relying on a nutella sandwich to keep me awake) sry im a bit chaotic rn

CONTENTS ... fluff , gender neutral reader

AKAASHI KEIJI

he finds it adorable, he isn’t usually surrounded by people who do something so silly and simple such as making beady bracelets for their friends. it’s such a pure thought to him and he finds that it fits you really well.

he wears it, of course. not everywhere and everytime (he’s not that obsessed not yet), but usually he pretends that it’s some sort of lucky charm to get him through the day, especially on tough ones.

occasionally, he wears it during plays. not every time. he’s afraid he might break it, and he doesn’t have the heart to break the news to you and maybe ask you for a new one. but luckily, keiji is the perfect guy for keeping fragile things safe.

but he’s also the type of guy to do something in return for someone who he sees in a far different light. so when he comes face to face with the bracelet corner of an art supply store, he starts remembering what you like.

didn’t you mention you liked this shade of color before? he’s sure you did.

do you prefer see through beads or sturdy ones?

would you get annoyed if there were too much dangling from it?

keiji is the type of guy to only get things that are needed, but that didn’t apply when he found himself buying a bit too much for making a bracelet. for you. but it’s for you so whatever.

the following day was when he planned on giving the bracelets to you. plural because he made one too many. (he wasn’t sure which ones you would like so he researched different types of design patterns so that they all wouldn’t look undistinguishable)

“eh?”

“I wasn’t sure how to properly make one, so I made a couple just in case you wouldn’t like some of it.”

“you kidding?” he mentioned how he wasn’t used to making bracelets, but the patterns and effort put into making these ones were just so advanced.

“I wanted to return the favor.” he flicked his wrist up, showing the friendship bracelet that you had made him a couple days ago, still perfectly intact. “say… making these is relaxing, could you teach me a couple patterns?”

“what?! no— how about you teach me how you did this!”

works for him either way.

BOKUTO KOTARO

he gets excited ofc, but he doesn’t really know what it means. but who cares right? his crush just gave him something, it doesn’t matter what it means! he’s just a simple-minded happy guy who gets happy at simple things!

when kotaro heard that you made the bracelet just for him, he’s over the moon. I mean— who else gets hand-made gifts from their crush? not a lot! he feels like he had just struck a gold pot with such a simple gift.

he wears it everywhere. during a game, practice, sleeping, showering, anything kotaro does on a daily basis—but there are people like akaashi or konoha who warns him that the bracelet is still breakable, especially for someone as chaotic as him, the nylon band wouldn’t hold for long if he kept smacking those volleyballs with such strength.

unsurprisingly, it happens during a match. just when kotaro had just hit a line shot, he feels like he’s on a roll. but when he landed back on the ground, the sound of the volleyball hitting the ground wasn’t the only thing heard, nor were the murmurs of the players on both sides.

tiny resin beads fell onto the wooden floor, then silence and dread soon followed kotaro.

the team had to clean the beads up to avoid injury, despite the ace wanting to pick them up and fix it right that instant— he can’t he has to finish the match

of course, this gets kotaro into a bitter taste, missing all his shots, his spikes were clunky, and his serves were ordinary, sometimes even missing.

they still won in the end, then kotaro could finally express his frustrations, not for his lack of play in the game but for the remaining pieces of the hard work you had put into giving him.

you eventually find out about this (through the immense begging of the team to have you confront a shameful kotaro since he himself feels too bad to actually tell you)

“I-I’m so sorry!” the ace acts in a way that felt like he had just done something to betray you (he didn’t but he feels really ashamed)

“kotaro it’s okay really, it—“

“but you worked so hard to make it! you know? like getting those annoying beads through the string and— and those… I really like the designs you did.” It didn’t take long before he started sobbing like a toddler who just had his favorite toy broken.

“really?” despite his playful sobs, you can’t help but chuckle and feel so warm that kotaro felt this way about something you made for him. “if that’s the case, why don’t we make some together? i’ll be sure to make them extra sturdy so they can withstand your amazing spikes!”

“really?!” he switched up so fast just by the thought of spending time with you.

HOSHIUMI KORAI

this guy… he has a lot of pride and unmeasurable ego. you really think he’d accept some silly little bracelets that someone made him that makes him look even more like a child?! of course not!

though in this case, you aren’t exactly just someone hehe. anyone who tried to put something silly on korai would be met with a pissed off expression and some degrading words— but when you fished him out of practice to show him some bracelets, he was confused.

“what are these?” korai knows what those are, he was more-so asking why are you giving it to him.

“friendship bracelets. I made them, aren’t they cute? I made these two for you, see?” he eyed the dangling set of beads that perfectly matched his colors: white, blue, black— one had his jersey number in the center while the other had his first name ‘korai’.

you made these for him? him specifically?

he loves it. but of course. his way of displaying it is just questionable.

“hah?! you really made these silly things for someone like me?!” (translation: i can’t believe you thought of me to the point of making me hand-made things, you’re so precious I don’t deserve you)

“yeah? don’t you like it?”

“well…” yes he does, it sort of pained him when he heard your question filled with sudden regret. “you know, if I receive, my wrists won’t be a stable surface for the ball if I wear that.” (translation: i love it, i’m scared if I might break it while receiving for spiking though, but I also want to wear it all the time so i’m kind of conflicted)

“oh… okay then.” korai flinched when you started to turn away with the bracelets in hand.

but before you could, his hand grabbed your wrists in a typical shojo manga fashion and dragged you closer to him (sorry I just finished rewatching kimi ni todoke)

“i’ll take both.”

when korai returned to practice, both his wrists were dangled with blue-white bracelets, displaying them as if they were hard-earned trophies (they are to him)

he doesn’t make it obvious but he flexes his new bands, to his teammates, classmates, opponents— even to the reporters and viewers. not you though. that’ll be a different story.

but he slips a bit when a reporter approaches him after a victory in the nationals.

“my receives weren’t even in their perfect shape, I bet other players can’t even pull off what I did with something like bracelets on—hah I bet they can’t even get a hand-made gift from someone special like I did—“

“korai-kun, you do know they could be watching right.” his teammate right then and there waved at the camera and called out your name with a “hi!” through the screen.

“h-hirugami— argh! forget it! i don’t want to continue!”

it wasn’t after that day when he received a message from you. “someone special?”

KOZUME KENMA

he was confused. what was he supposed to do with them?

“you wear them? duh.”

“yeah but…”

it was cute. the bracelet and the gesture. but wouldn’t it be too… attractive? wouldn’t other people question him on why he’s wearing something like that around his wrists?

“it’s okay if you don’t wear it, just keep it somewhere.”

only when you left did kenma slip the beady bracelet around his wrist. he shook his arm, ensuring it wouldn’t fall off easily and that it didn’t make much noise.

it felt normal. it wasn’t annoying nor did it get too suffocating, it was just right. it wouldn’t cause much distraction for him.

oh but it did though. just like how much you had occupied his thoughts, so did this bracelet you made for him. every time he was holding his controller, he would be reminded of you because he saw what was around his wrist, which causes him to lose focus on the game and eventually get defeated.

and when setting the ball, his hands are always in view, meaning he could see some of the see through beads glistening from the ceiling lights when he was about to toss the ball, leading him to be distracted and lose focus, completely missing the ball as it lands on his face and onto the floor.

“what’s up with you?”

“nothing, the lights were blinding.”

“maybe your eyes are damaged after playing those video games at night with max brightness.”

“kuroo i’m fine.”

“really?” the captain then points to his wrist, “that bracelet sure does look fine as well.”

before kuroo could get a hand on the beads, kenma snatched his hand away before heading to the bathroom.

he couldn’t ignore the grinning face of his friend as much as he couldn’t ignore the thought of you for as long as he wore this bracelet.

and so he doesn’t.

when you watch him play against some school for a tournament, expectedly, your hand-made gift wasn’t around his wrist.

you expected it, but somehow it felt a bit disappointing.

“what’s wrong?” it was already class, and as usual kenma noticed something wrong about your sudden gloominess.

“nothing.”

“hm.” was all he said before continuing spamming buttons on his switch, you really wanted to ask him.

did he not like it? maybe it was a bit too silly? too out of character for him? you thought that maybe it would hurt his ego (you’re pretty sure he doesn’t have one but more of “image”)

“hey…“ you stopped when you saw a glimpse— just a glimpse of something dangling around his wrist. it was hidden, really well-hidden through his sleeves.

“yeah?”

“oh, nothing.”

“you’ve been saying that a lot.”

“what? not like you don’t say it a lot too.”

“i don’t.”

“yeah? what’s that thing around your wrist?”

“nothing.”

rimi's notes ...

sorry if it feels ehh yk? haven't wrote for hq in like years (i think) i kinda miss it was also supposed to include noya suna and tsukishima but figured it was getting a bit too long eh next time ig (planned to also do this for other fandoms as well) ALSO IDK HOW TO MAKE A MASTERLIST (sidenote: korai is a cutie patootie he deserves more fics here) hearts / reblogs / follows are very much appreciated ★

[hayleylwong]

reflection 05-23

9:33pm - today i woke up at like 12:30. this was disappointing bc i was supposed to get up earlier to study for my chem midterm tm. instead i didnt study until like 4 bc i had to go sit outside and talk to people and then i went to class for like five minutes but i left to go study for chem bc i thought that was more important. i went to the schoenberg music practice rooms w my friend that can play piano to take a break from studying and omg the practice room hallway looks and sounds like a psychiatric ward like i swear all the instruments blended together and sounded like clown music and the hallway was long and the doors were all like scary w one little window in them. but i liked hearing my friend play piano. then i met my other friend at feast and ate dumplings and we got to talk i wish i could see her more often. then i went to study some more w my friend from before and we had to check like 15 lounges before we found an empty table. tn im gonna do pomodoro method so i am writing this during one of my breaks. i hope i can get through everything rn i feel like it is doable i bought yerba and celsius earlier so i am prepared for my all nighter. we will see how doable it feels as the night progresses. i am looking forward to 4:00pm tm when i can finally sleep after my midterm and hanging out w people for an hour 3 times in a row.

9:44pm - omg i called today the 21st accidentally. i just realized i cannot sleep at 4 bc of club work due at 5. ughhhh it is only the beginning of the night and i already want to sleep. i have overdone my pomodoro break by 11 minutes now. it is not a good sign.

12:10am - it was not a good sign. i have watched one and a half lectures and am two hours and twenty minutes into my current break. i went to the store and got more yerba mate but it is not working. i have seven lectures left and less than ten hours before my midterm. when am i going to shower. i now cannot sleep until 7pm tomorrow. my eczema is making me itch inside my body i am uncomfortable and everything is irritating me i cannot focus but i will. i will do it i have to otherwise idk what to do no i have to i really have to. only 19 more hours of misery.

3:54am - i have watched one hour of lecture in the last six hours. i am scared. there are other peoples review notes on the white board and i do not recognize some of the words. my friend said theyre important. no position is comfortable i am hella fidgety and my skin is freaking out. i want to shower but i do not have time. my friend is abt to go to sleep and leave me. who will keep me awake. i an beginning to do the thing i used to do where i blink weird and tense my head muscles bc i feel off. i am going to hug my boy. except i just saw his explore page and let me tell you i have never seen so many asian bikini thirst traps in my life. and i scrolled through his for you page and the same girl kept coming up. tell me why when i was scrolling through the explore he said ‘ooh a white one’ like three times. like actually wtf. have i told u guys his ex is white. my chem prof is rly grinding my gears rn. i hope i does not ever find my tumblr. i hope i can focus in the next six hours. oh no that is not enough time. no no no no no

5:16 - i actually cannot think. my head is numb. but the caffeine is finally working and i cannot sleep. i am so f ed. my head does not work. maybe i am just irritable rn. i hate everything. wtf is a nucleophile and how do u tell how strong it is. i just learned but i forget. i am going to cry.

5:26 - my friend is going to sleep soon. what am i gonna do. i was supposed to be done w lec by now and i have six left. i have four hours left before the exam. i have never been so disappointed in myself. i am sad. what am i going to do. i cant cry im too dehydrated and i dont have time for that. what is wrong w me

6:26 - how am i still on the same lecture as an hour ago. i am so miserable. was this quarter really worth it if im gonna fail this class? i wasnt even good at this quarter. but it is too late now bc if i dont go through w that i alr failed. i cant even hear anything shes saying anymore but i barely have time to watch even on 2x speed

6:50 - i am struggling. thinking abt doing anything makes me want to sob. i really really hope my club does not make us do stuff for an extra week bc i actually do not think i can. that week will be spent studying for finals. ik what to prioritize now. they should make that more clear. ughhh my brain is being attacked with words. it does not like it. i hate myself rn. i need to scream

jp updates: sam is feeling good today. he is curious whether or not he asks people for contact information weirdly and is working on changing his phrasing.