#im gonna get you out of there Opal I JUST WANT HER TO BE HAPPY 😭😭😭😭😭😭

[superbellsubways]

i still think about OPAL so much... oneof my favorite animations ever i think. everything about it makes me AAAAGH

[sxyphen]

soooo I made some morphology's and outfits for td charcters, here’s what I have so far (warning, this is gonna be long)

Gwen: outfit (Female Pearlcatcher; teal Jupiter, obsidian Basic, and emerald Basic) This is one of my personal favorites, it's simple but it works really well, but you'll see the morphologies and outfits get more complicated soooo

Courtney: outfit (Female Coatl; sand Cherub, camo Constellation, and wisteria Basic) Another favorite, she just looks pretty :3

Duncan: outfit (Male Bogsneak, eldritch Cinder, fern Blaze, and flaxen Basic) Silly little eepy guy, I feel like this is probably the most accurate dragon of any td character i've made. not much to say about him tho

Alejandro: outfit (Male Imperial; coral Python, maroon Shimmer, and blood Smoke) This is actually a dragon that I have, you can check him out here, but it actually took a couple tries to get an outfit that I think works with him lol

Bridgette: outfit (Female Skydancer; caribbean Lionfish, sanddollar Shimmer, and cobalt Okapi) nothing much to say other than, pretty :3

Geoff: outfit (Male Pearlcatcher; magenta Clown, ivory Butterfly, and strawberry Spines) same with Bridgette, I wanted them to be matching, cause, y'know. they kiss :<, but I honestly prefer this one over Bridgette (the outfit, not the morphology)

Harold: outfit (Male Ridgeback; periwinkle Skink, orange Hex, and fern Stained) I'm really happy with how this came out, even if it took a couple redos lol, and the steampunk apparel works with Harold's, vibe

ok for some stupid reason I can't put the pictures of Beth, Justin, Katie and Sadie [im on pc], so I'm just going to link the morphologies here: Beth (Female Aether; ivory Candy, magenta Butterfly, and shamrock Wish), Justin (Male Aether; bronze Boa, hunter Daub, and overcast Flutter), Katie and Sadie (Female Aberration; brown Pinstripe, ivory Flair, and cottoncandy Koi)

Ezekiel: outfit (Male Wildclaw; algae Pinstripe, soil Patchwork, and stonewash Veined) My favorite tbh, can't really explain why it just, ✨does✨

Feral Ezekiel: outfit (Male Mirror; fern Stiched, camo Patchwork, and cobalt Ghost) yeah, i made the eepy. i changed the breed cause 1) it reflects how ezekiel changed after his mutation, and 2) Male Wildclaw's position(?) isn't creaturey enough

Leshawna: outfit (Female Obelisk; ginger Falcon, obsidian Rosette, and cerise Contour) Nothing much to say about this one tbh, she looks real pretty tho :D

Owen: outfit (Male Snapper; metals Ground, marigold Safari, and teal Koi) I like this one, it's simple but unfortunately i couldn't find anything to represent his maple leaf :(

Cody: outfit (Male Coatl; gold Swirl, twilight Fissure, and copper Contour) i'm honestly not happy with this one, specifically the outfit. might redo this one later, and remove all the autumn stuff

DJ: outfit (Male Tundra; camo Python, brown Constellation, and dust Runes) lookie, is my boy :3333333333

Izzy: outfit (Female Mirror; sunshine Clown, pear Eye Spots, and avocado Gembond) really happy with this one, it fits her well and gives off her craziness :>

Sierra: outfit (Female Spiral; jade Clown, mulberry Hypnotic, and blackberry Opal) i'm very lucky to have found the apparel that i did for her, cause if i didn't, i have no idea what outfit to have given her ;-; but yeah she pretty

Eva: outfit (Female Snapper; cobalt Falcon, sapphire Peregrine, and obsidian Spines) big buff lady :D

Tyler: outfit (Male Ridgeback; cherry Jupiter, sable Eel, and white Basic) A fan of this one, and the Love's Herald was a gift from Lindsay. and now thinking about it, i might wanna make some lore for this. it's a big maybe though

Lindsay: outfit (Female Fae; garnet Flaunt, honey Jester, and cornflower Scales) i don't know how to feel abt this one, not a fan of it. and also will probably redo the outfit. the morphology i can live with.

Noah: outfit (Male Nocturne; brown Jupiter, pthalo Safari, and crimson Underbelly) another favorite, it gives off very Noah vibes lol (and i just realized that he shares a gene with Owen. so do with that information as you will)

Trent: outfit (Male Skydancer; algae Viperia, forest Eel, and obsidian Koi) I love this one, gives off very bard/guitarist kinda vibes. and if there was lore, i imagine trent would be a nomad entertainer, playing in small towns and cities, and maybe at a bar or two

Chris: outfit (Male Fae; forest Falcon, teal Myrid, and obsidian Smoke) look, it's him, the guy!!!!/j but in all seriousness, this is literally just him. entitled little short king who slays (i also have one for Chef, but it's yucky :,<)

i had one for Heather, but I deleted the outfit for her, which was of a dragon that i already sold, soooooooo i'm just gonna make a new one for her :3 also thank you for reading this long ass post (if you actually did), it means a lot to me :3

[grimgrinninggrimoreghosts]

Honestly i don’t have followers so im just going to awnser

Rose Quarts: Honestly this question kind of pisses me off because i really like and want all of the options and i try to give others all of the options. Maybe it comes from not feeling loved and craving it but give me EVERYTHING

Onyx: The gods i worship, My boyfriend

Diamond: @soggy-beast , Buzzy and Wyv

Smokey Quarts: Vampire Probably🤷‍♂️

Malachite: My hair has legit been almost every color natural and not. Right now I’m digging my natural hair (red brown, i like to dye it redder) but it was blue for a looooong time

Tigers Eye: Instant Gratification, Hubris, Constant Stimulation and Addiction

Moonstone: I’m a hellenistic pagan, a witch and a psychopomp. I work heavily with the dead, im a safe place and home for alot of ghosts! I give them refuge, help get messages across, help them pass and take care of them.

Opal: honestly it sounds like religious psychosis to me; its important to be able to tell whats real and whats not✨

Selenite: idk smash mouth? Music kind of sucked in the 90s in my opinion. I was a small child so i mostly listened to my parents/older brothers stuff and when i did get to pick i mostly wanted disney or cartoon music and didn’t really have a good taste in music. I prefer music now honestly

Clear Quarts: Why not both?✨🤙 in all seriousness though growing up i thought i was a cat person; had nothing against dogs i just had never really formed a strong connection with one. And then my puppy Crowley came and i honestly fell in love with dogs✨💕 Dream pet would probably be an octopus. It would never happen. I don’t think it would lead a happy fulfilling life in a cage being such an intelligent animal. Don’t even know if it’s legal. Would probably cost A lot. Tons of reasons its a bad idea BUT IT WOULD BE SO COOL

Amethyst: So in high school i found out the man who i grew up thinking was my father legit wasn’t and went off looking for bio dad. He is super cool! I love him and his wife/my stepmom ( i call her mama) and their dog!✨ but i bring this up because i found out i am greek! So I’ve been trying to connect with my heritage!✨🏛️ i have been trying to learn greek; I’ve been learning about the mythology and history and culture! And honestly being a Hellenistic Pagan is a way for me to further connect with that side of me! I love it! Its super cool having already had a interest in all of that and then realizing half of you is a part of that. He is the best dad i could have ever hoped for as well

Citrine: i don’t always come off the best, i struggle to interact and bond with others. But to the friends that stick around; your amazing and your stuck with me lmao. I always mean well and give things my all!✨💀

Obsidian depends on my mood/state of mind, if im manic EVERYTHINGS AMAZING THE WORLD IS BEAUTIFUL EVERYTHINGS THE BESSST!!!!✨✨✨✨ when my depression/anxiety/panic or anger disorders kick in its like OH GOD I AM A TERRIBLE PERSON EVERYTHING IS AWFUL IM GONNA FAIL IM GONNA DIE BLAHBLAHBLAH

So yeah! Both honestly.

Cherry Jasper: honestly passionate people? Like tell me what your passionate about!✨ hyperfixate! Gush! Spill your guts!✨✨ even if i have no interest in the thing, dont understand anything about it i love that energy and gusto.

Agate: blueberry cheesecake? And slushy!✨✨✨✨

⋆｡ﾟcrystal ask game ﾟ｡⋆

⋆☁︎  get your followers to send a crystal name to ask a question  ☾ ﾟ⋆

Rose quartz- What’s your love language?

Onyx- What makes you feel safe and protected?

Diamond- Name three mutuals/friends who you appreciate. 

Smokey quartz- If you were a mythical creature, what would you be?

Malachite- If you could have any colour hair, what would you pick?

Tiger’s eye- Why do you think people like social media so much?

Moonstone- Would you describe yourself as a spiritual person? Do you follow any religions or particular practices?

Opal- Do you believe in reality shifting? If so, have you tried it?

Selenite- Share a music artist that you love from the 90s. 

Clear quartz- Are you a cat or a dog person? Dream pets?

Amethyst- Ramble about something that you’re passionate about. Tell us why you love it, and what it means to you.

Citrine- What do you wish more people knew about you?

Obsidian- Are you an optimist or a pessimist? 

Cherry jasper- What’s a topic that you find interesting yet know nothing about?

Agate- If you could order any food to your home right now, free of charge, what would you pick out?

Turquoise- Free space! Ask me whatever you like.

⋆☁︎  my DMs are open for custom ask game requests- just pick a theme e.g. astrology or flowers, and I’ll make one for you ☾ ﾟ⋆

[calpops]

family | c.h.

A plan for dinner in which your parents are to meet Calum for the first time doesn’t go as expected but it shows you who your true family is. 

1.3k words

dates with cal masterlist

Copyright © 2020 calpops. All rights reserved. This original work is not allowed to be reposted on any platform in any format (translations included).

<< >>

You stand with a heavy heart, patience running thin and hope shattering on the kitchen floor where you had prepared a dinner you hoped to share with Calum and your parents. Calum is beside you, his arm around your waist and understanding in his eyes. He knew of your rocky relationship with your parents and the troubles it could arise but he had yet to meet them. Tonight is supposed to be that night. You shift, head shaking and eyes burning.

“Are you sure you told them the right time?” Calum asks, trying to stay optimistic so you don’t crumble any further. His hand squeezes your waist to remind you he’s there even if they aren’t.

“I think so,” you say around a tight sigh and fish into your pocket for your phone. “I called them last night. They sounded like they wanted to come. They promised.”

Your parents aren’t prone to making promises and just the word was enough to elicit false hope into you. No messages light up your screen as you glance down at your phone.

“Maybe... your parents don’t like me?” Calum questions and tries to make it a joke, tries to make his tone light and take the burden off your shoulders.

“They don’t even know you,” you reply, suddenly resigned and defeated. You know waiting for them will be excruciating. Standing around in the kitchen with the cooling food as a reminder of their tardiness isn’t going to help. You busy yourself with wrapping the dishes to put in the fridge.

“What are you doing?” Calum’s voice comes from behind you as you slide a salad in.

“It’s gonna get gross if it stays out much longer. I’ll just put it away while we wait.”

Your tone verges on desperation and Calum senses it immediately. He sees the shine of your eyes and the way your hands clench around the handle of the fridge.

“We can wait,” Calum reassures, lightly rubs the small of your back to calm you down and helps put away the rest with you before heading to the living room couch.

Duke joins you, curls up on your lap as a comfort mechanism—able to sense your distress and sadness without even understanding why—Calum sits beside you, tries at small talk while time ticks by. It’s an hour past the time they said they’d be here. Your hope is all but decimated when you check your phone one last time and come up empty. You feel as if you shouldn’t be surprised. This is nothing new; they missed birthdays and graduations and everything in between, but for some reason—perhaps a reason that shines with diamonds, an opal and your entire future—you thought it might be different this time.

“They’re not coming,” you realize just seconds before a call lights up your phone and hope comes back to taunt you. You answer with a timid greeting. Crack out an ‘okay’ when the hope goes back to shards and hang up the phone with tears on your cheeks. “They’re not. They said they have some stuff at home. Some-something about a…”

You can’t even finish their lame excuse before a sob slips through and you hide your face in your hands. Calum’s arms wind around you without hesitation, he pulls you into his chest, hands falling from your face in favor of hiding against him. His hands stroke through your hair, down your back, up and down again and again until another sob breaks and you start to shake.

“Sweetheart,” he says and it’s more than you could have thought to say if the roles were reversed. His voice is soft and sincere when he continues. “I’ve got you.”

You know what he means when he says that. Your parents aren’t here for you, they never really have been, but he is and the ring on your finger is a promise that he always will be. You try to collect yourself and stop a sob in its attempt to escape you. Instead a hiccup comes out and you hear Calum’s little huff of a giggle; he’s always said your hiccups are adorable.

“I feel stupid,” you admit and wonder if Calum can even understand you through the muffle and shake of your voice. He does. He always does.

“It’s not your fault,” he reminds but you shake your head.

“I should know better by now. They do this all the time,” you begin, finally finding some voice for the aching thoughts plaguing you. You still won’t pull away from him, too content to bask in his comfort, unsure you can look him in the eye when tears still slide from yours. “They don’t even want to meet the man I’m going to marry before I marry him. They probably won’t come to the engagement party. It’d be a miracle if they show up to the wedding. They just don’t care. Family isn’t supposed to be like this.”

“Family is complicated,” Calum says but you don’t want any attempts at justifications, whether either of you believe them or not. You just want a family that cares.

“I should be used to it by now—I just don’t have a family, not really.”

“You do,”‘ Calum insists and doesn’t let you hide anymore, his hands cup your jaw and gently coax you to look at him. “You have me and my parents and Mali and the guys and all of our friends. We are here for you. We love you.”

You nod, unable to find words to express the thoughts now finding you. He’s right. He has been there for you since the day you met. His parents took to you the moment you were introduced to them and Mali even before that, she texted you and called you well before an in person meeting. The guys welcomed you with open arms and thanked you for making Calum happy. They are his family and made you a part of it. The friends you made in adulthood had become like siblings. You might be missing some pieces but there are other people to fill in the gaps and make you feel whole.

“I love you,” you finally manage to get out, wipe your eyes and sniffle.

“And someday”—Calum says, thumb brushing away tears you missed—“we’ll have a family of our own.”

You let out a breath, a smile trudging through the sadness at his words that kick up ripples of warmth from the inside out. You nod, this time with happiness and a yearning for that future. For that family.

“We will,” you say, sure about that. “I’ll never be like my parents.”

“I know,” Calum responds with just as much certainty and a smirk growing on his face. “How many kids do you want?”

You tilt your head to the side. “At least two. So they can always have a friend.”

Calum laughs and nods in agreement. “Two is good. D’you have any names picked out yet?”

You bite your lip and dart your eyes up to the ceiling. The way he knows that you do and is waiting to hear them makes you know the ring on your finger and all of the promises it comes with are meant to be. Your lip springs free and you grin.

“I have some thoughts,” you admit but want to keep them secret until the time is right.

Calum talks to you about the future. You both get lost in a world yet to come. Make plans that won’t happen for years to come but you would bet with your whole heart and soul will happen eventually. Calum wouldn’t lie to you. Calum wouldn’t string you along and break your heart. He’s your family now.

<< >>

If you’d like to be added to my tag list just let me know!

Based on the dates with cal engagement prompt: your family doesn’t like me? And @outerspaceisbetterthannothing message of: They plan on finally meeting her parents. She’s very nervous and the very last moment her parents ditch them, saying they won’t be able to come because of some shit and that it’s not so important anyway, they’re sure Cal is a nice guy and they’ll meet him at the wedding. And she’s really upset and Cal tries to reassure her when he sees her tears, saying he is her family now and she has his parents and his sister and all of the boys. That’s her family, she’s not alone.

Tagged: @rosecolouredash​ @irwinkitten​ @golden-hood @who-do-you-love-5sos​ @caswinchester2000​ @wildflowergrae​ @empathycth​ @cuddlemecalx @malumsmermaid​ @babylon-corgis​ @outerspaceisbetterthannothing​ @mariellelovescupcakes​ @xhaileyreneex​ @goth5sos​ @gosh-im-short​ @feliznavidaddycal​ @loveroflrh​ @findingliam-o​ @flowerthug​ @g-l-pierce​ @talkfastromance4​ @superbloomirwin​ @wastedheartcth​ @calumscalm​ @notinthesameguey​ @lukesfuckingbeard​ @myloverboyash​ @treatallwithkindness​ @haikucal​ @wiildflower-xxx​ @calum-uncrowned @egyptiangoldhood​ @drarryetcetera​ @another-lonely-heart​ @megz1985​ @idk-harry​ @dinosaursandsocks​ @wildflower-cth​ @idontneedanyone​ @everyscarisahealingplace​ @myfavfanficsever​ @stormrider505​ @karajaynetoday​ @333-xx​ @calumshpod​ @calumsphile​ @calumrose​ @justhereforcalum​ @grreatgooglymoogly​ @calumance​ @mantlereid @hemmingslftv​ 

[daydream-believin]

The Never-Ending Roadtrip (waffles)

summary: (part 1) or (part 5) <- reader joins douxie on his quest to protect nari. he’ll need company wont he. (part 6) do you like waffles? also appalachia and nj trollmarket fun. next-> (part 7)

warnings: swearing, fem! reader, maybe an alcohol mention, proof reading is for squares yo

word count: 3875

a/n: i’m sorry to anyone from PA but wtf. i also have no idea why this turned out the way it did. bon apetit.

no gif im trying to test something

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Y/n looked over at Douxie. The blue of his hair was starting to fade into a duller hue. While not as bright and bold as his personality, it was still very nice to look at. This muted blue was softer, almost comforting in a way. Y/n found herself running her fingers through it. It wasn’t just the color that was soft. Like feathers in her hand, she gently caressed the strands. The duller color made him look tired, older, and the permanent bags under his eyes didn’t help. She placed her hand on his face and ran her thumb over a said eye bag. He gave her a very subdued smile in return. His sunken eyes were so beautiful. Her favorite color. Or colors, one should say. They were like an earth toned opal. Y/n’s hand drifted down his face. She used her thumb to explore his cheekbones, tracing constellations in his freckles, and finally settled on his mouth, tracing his cupid’s bow. Douxie couldn’t help but break the stoic face he was trying to hold.

“As much as I hate to ask this, and I really do, but will you please cease what you’re doing, My Love. I’m trying to drive here.”

“Yes, I would also like to ask you to stop, miss L/n. Not wrecking the ship is worth you canning your pda for a while.” Archie added.

Y/n pulled her hand back and exaggeratedly pouted. She teasingly stuck her tongue out at Archie for good measure, but couldn’t help but dissolve into a snicker right after so it wasn’t very effective. But really, it wasn’t her fault that Douxie’s beautifully sculpted face was right there and demanding to be touched. She tried to distract herself by focusing on the scenery around them. North Pennsylvania was delightful, so it’d be a shame if she spent the whole time that they flew through it looking at nothing but Douxie. There was plenty of time for her to do that the rest of her life. It’s not like she didn’t have every freckle memorized already. Every single adorable little dot. Right, Pennsylvania. Appalachia. Y/n was a little disappointed they didn’t manage to go through West Virginia, being as north as they were. She really wanted to know what all the fuss was about. Country roads.

The mountains were hard to transverse through, so Douxie took the boat up high in the clouds. A little too high. The oxygen was thin. While this didn’t affect Archie the dragon or Nari the plant goddess, Douxie and Y/n were getting a bit woozy. Neither would get altitude sickness to the point of dying, thanks to that good ol’ curse of immortality, but their minds weren’t exactly operating at high speeds here. They passed through a low hanging cloud in a puff of fog.

Though they were over it, just being in the range of Appalachia felt odd. There was a presence that clung to the mountains. Even flying high up in the air, one felt as though they were being watched. Like the thousand eyes of the forest were upon them. Looking down below, hanging over the edge like Douxie hated her to do, Y/n saw a herd of deer that might as well be ants. Watching over the herd was a bigger, or maybe closer, stag on a peak of some sort. His antlers were covered in crimson. Y/n hoped he was just shedding.

There were pathways cutting through the trees below, some roads, some manmade trails, some rivers, some troll trails, and some deer trails. Some that wound around in endless curves, some that seemed to start from nowhere and stop at nothing, some that went round and round in a circle, and some that crossed over each other, effectively creating a maze of sorts. Y/n didn’t know why, but she was glad she was above the trees and not in them. Something within her gut told her that as beautiful as the scenery was, she did not wish to experience it first-hand. The deer below were beautiful, but there was something not quite right about them. She couldn’t quite put her finger on it. She wasn’t sure if she’d be able to turn down a game of ninepins either, and she could really go for a drink.

Douxie’s brain may have been foggy, but he could certainly see Y/n hanging over the edge again, tantalizing him. He couldn’t help but imagine 174 ways for it to end badly. He’d been pretty passive about this before but now that they were so high up, he had no choice but to be up front now.

“Y/n, My Love,” Y/n turned her attention to him, which also pulled her weight more towards the boat than the sky. Good. “do you mind being back near the center of the ship? I really don’t like you draping yourself over the railing like that.”

Y/n was getting sick and tired of people always trying to keep her away from edges, advising her not to climb the mountain, telling her to stay inside when there was only a light rainstorm. She could handle it. She wasn’t a fucking porcelain doll. She was not wearing a fancy gown that suffocated her, she could speak, her lips were not perfectly painted on. And she wouldn’t shatter. “Relax, Dewdrop. I’m fine. I’m not just gonna go skydiving for kicks. If anyone has had a penchant for falling through the sky recently, it’s been you, Hisirdoux. I can catch myself with anti-gravity spells, like you taught me. Besides, we walk across tall, crumbly, ancient non-osha compliant walkways all the time. You never had a problem then.”

“Well,” He huffed, “it would be one thing if I was there next to you, but I’m not, so could you please just try to stay safe when I can’t reach you?” Y/n was taken about at how quick his tone went from annoyed to desperate. She furrowed her brows. Doux sighed, “Look, it frightens me, okay. I know that nothing will happen, but what if it does? I can’t- I can’t lose you.” His tone got even feebler in his pleading. “And there’s so many ways to lose you. Especially with the Order on our tails. Please, just give me this peace of mind for at least one thing.”

Y/n stepped away from the railing, crossing over to Douxie. He opened his arm and she nestled into his side. Pressing her head against his chest, she mumbled, “Absolutely. I’ll just—I’ll just stay here then. Next to you. I’m sorry I worried you. That was the last thing I wanted to do.”

He leaned down to press a kiss to the top of her head. “Thank you, My Darling.”

~ ~ ~

The dipped down south to go through the top of Maryland and completely through Delaware to get to the south of New Jersey, in place of just going through Philadelphia. The city of brotherly love was not on the itinerary.  Philly, and the top of New Jersey, were just too densely populated to take a magic boat through. The airspace was filled with airplanes and skyscrapers. It was easier to go the roundabout way.

As they passed between Philly and Lancaster, they went by fantastically named towns such as Paradise the city, where the girls are pretty, Bird In Hand, Blue Ball, and Intercourse. Stellar. Y/n was starting to really like Pennsylvania. It was cursed ground. She made sure to get photographic evidence of every road sign. Douxie was happy to pose with them.

They took a pit stop in a town called Peach Bottom before leaving Pennsylvania. Y/n wanted to go through New Texas, since she was curious how somewhere in the original colonies could be a new Texas, but Nari could sense a river nearby, and wanted to seek it out. Peach Bottom. It was a cozy little town with a power plant that was dumping it’s waste into the riverside it was built on. Toxic river. Fun. Y/n made Douxie explain to Nari why she couldn’t get near the river or touch any of the water. Y/n wouldn’t have been able to stay as calm as Douxie could. There was nothing happening in the rural Pennsylvanian town. Nothing special about it unless you counted their countless nuclear admissions. The locals didn’t care for strangers, and that was alright with them cause they didn’t want to be here for any more than necessary for a restroom break. Dinner could wait.

The top of Maryland was great. Lots of rivers to make it up to Nari. There was just, an incredibly large walmart near the line. Just absolutely humongous whopper walmart. A leach whose name doesn’t even deserve to be capitalized, thank you very much autocorrect.

It took less than half an hour to fly right through the top of Delaware. Hi Delaware, bye Delaware.

Soon they were on the coast of south New Jersey, headed for a sleepy town called Monty. Monty was a town along the Cohansey, split across it with quite an impressive bridge between the two sides. As soon as the bridge became visible on the skyline, Y/n grabbed Douxie’s sleeve and tugged excitedly. She looked up at him with a big smile. Rest. At last, they were going to get to rest. Y/n made herself busy calling Jim to let him know that they were there so he could call someone else to let them know that they were there and to wait by the entrance for them. Neither Douxie nor Y/n had a horngazzle on them at the moment. Y/n had had one in her possession back in Arcadia, being book club buddies with Blinky, but alas that was destroyed along with their bookstore.

They hid that damn magic boat in the forest. While they did plan on staying with the trolls for a few weeks, Douxie didn’t put it back in its glass bottle quite yet, cause they were in fact taking it into New York not tomorrow but the next day. He covered the ground around it with a few more wards than necessary. Y/n threw up an illusion spell around it, as she had been all the other times they’d just left it in the woods, and thought the wards were overkill but didn’t say anything. They started on the trek to the base of the bridge.

The troll at the entrance greeted them cordially. He was a dark green color, with two massive horns resembling those of a longhorn cow, chiseled stone tattoos, and no clothes other than a tiny loincloth which made everyone but Nari uncomfortable. He let them in with flourish, as if he’d always wanted to do this and practiced it.

“Welcome to NEW JERSEY TROLLMARKET.”

Y/n was surprised at how well the town had come along within the two months the trolls had occupied the cavern. It wasn’t the Trollmarket she had known, there was no Blinky and no library, but still marvelous. The new hearthstone glowed warmly, very much alive and not making zombies. While looking pretty similar to the old Trollmarket, with a multitude of shops and homes carved into the mineral covered walls and formations, there was a sort of human touch to it now. Claire definitely had a hand in the planning and maybe the decorative features too. Or perhaps Jim. Y/n wouldn’t put it past the boy to be the one who designed the very elaborate crystal art flower bed she was looking at. Or that weirdly steampunk bridge. Funny thing, a bridge under a bridge.

Dictatious met them soon after they came in to show them around and to where they would be staying. The tour he gave them basically just included him walking them through the main street, waving his arms to various places and vaguely saying that they were shops but not what they sold, pointing out the pub, and then took them straight to their accommodations. Since the home that had been occupied by Blinky, Jim, and Claire was now empty, they’d be staying there, with the place practically to themselves. Dictatious also lived in said home, but rarely stuck around it for long now that his brother was gone.

“Alright, here’s your nest.”

Since Dictatious still slept in the nest that he shared with Blinky, he had given them Jim and Claire’s. The nests were just rocky bowls carved into the floor of the room, with a few comfort items. Thankfully, Jim and Claire had left theirs full of pillows and a couple thick cushions they must have taken from a couch. Unconventional, but better than sleeping on literal solid rock. Speaking of couches, there were way too many couches spread across the apartment. This entire place only had two rooms, a large living area and a nestroom, and yet there were five couches. Not to mention the extra-large easy chair Dic was currently lounging in. Okay, so one of said couches was technically a love seat, but still. There was no kitchen, which was surprising due to this being Jim Lake Jr’s home, and no table besides the one that three of the sofas were gathered around and a paper-covered work desk against a corner. There were glowing crystal lamps all throughout, lighting the house. All in all, interesting interior design decisions. The kids had definitely been trying to make it a more homey human dwelling but had limited options.

Nari nestled into the nest, happy that there were no blankets to smother her. Not even a minute passed and she was out like a light. Douxie and Y/n sat on one of the couches in the nestroom, watching the veggie lady snooze. Archie made himself comfy in Douxie’s lap, who absent mindedly stroked his familiar’s fur. They were underground now. Surrounded by inorganic matter. Some of that inorganic matter could fight, would be willing to fight, would probably be disappointed if there wasn’t a fight. The little devil on Douxie’s shoulder wasn’t really having to work hard. His stomach growled. They had opted to just not stop for dinner in favor of plowing right through their trip route. It was late, and dark, and Douxie really just wanted them to have a roof over their head before midnight. And now they did.

He looked over at Y/n. They had been a couple for an entire day now and he had yet to take her on a proper date. What a bad boyfriend he was. It’s not like Archie would want to come with them or anything either, since he filled himself with birds that didn’t know what hit them while they traveled. The dragon had even caught a hawk at one point, which wasn’t as impressive as it sounds, since Archie was a much faster flyer. He would be happy to watch Nari for them, surely. And Dic had given them a horngazzle so they could come and go as they pleased. It was settled then.

“Arch, watch Nari for us, please, we’ll be back in a pinch,” He grabbed Y/n’s hand to pull her off the couch, “C’mon, My Love, we’re going on a date.”

~ ~ ~

Turns out the only thing open past midnight in small town New Jersey was a waffle house. The perfect date. Y/n had thought it funny to watch Douxie try and deactivate all the fresh wards he had put around the boat. He had to be careful where he put his feet, and it was like he was doing a silly little dance. Ward trap ballet of his own barely thought-out design. At one point he stepped backwards to admire his work, triggering the ward behind him, and Y/n had to free him from the net. Lucky it was just a net one.

Entering the waffle house, they slid into the nearest booth, the one near the jukebox. They ordered what else but waffles. The food of kings and hungover college kids. Not just plain waffles, though. Douxie got chocolate chip and Y/ got strawberry, and they were going to combine them to make chocolate covered strawberry waffles. Everyone knows chocolate covered strawberries were the most romantic food, why else would they push them so hard around Valentine’s.

Douxie leaned in with his head in his hand. “So, tell me about yourself.”

Y/n laughed, decided to play into this bit. “Oh, I’m just a California lass, on her way to New York. Things have been crazy lately. Went to a very convincing renaissance faire, I’m harboring a fugitive, my roommate keeps hitting on me. Very stressful.  Sure am lucky I came across you, Mr. Handsome.”

“Lucky indeed.” Doux snickered.

Y/n pointed to the jukebox behind Doux, which he twisted around to see. “Have you ever heard ‘Last Night I Saw Elvis At Waffle House’?”

“No?”

“Oh, it’s a banger.” She got out of the booth and put a coin in the juke, making her selection. She slid back in with a Cheshire cat grin and Doux was kind of scared now, actually. As the current song ended and the song that they were waiting for began. Well, it was a song. About seeing Elvis in a waffle house. With a country tune he supposed someone thought was catchy in order for them to have recorded this. Douxie didn’t know what he had expected.

“Uh, wow.”

“Yeah, Ain’t it something. I loved this song when I was knee high to a grasshopper. All the waffle house jams really.”

“Your aunt let someone bring you to a waffle house? That’s not very proper.” Douxie chuckled.

“Oh, no, actually. Um, this was before my dad passed and my mother, ah, slipped.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

Douxie rubbed the back of his neck. “I’m sorry I mentioned it.”

“No, no. I’m fine Dewdrop. I can talk about it, really. And, like you said the other day, I’ve been focusing on the Now Love.” The silly waffle house themed song was still playing despite the air of seriousness that had fallen over the duo. It helped keep Y/n from getting too sad and dwelling on the memories she had just brought up. It was comical, really. A waffle house song keeping her grounded. She rubbed the palm of Douxie’s hand. “I still mourn my family, but it’s been so long that the pain’s but a dull ache now. As long as I don’t think too hard about it. If anyone knows about mourning it’d be you, Doux. I can’t imagine meeting hundreds of friends over my lifetime just to watch them all grow old and die while you just have to go on living.” She paused, eyes drifting downwards, “But I suppose that’ll be my fate anyways.”

Douxie reached over and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “It’s actually not that bad, once you get used to it. You just have to enjoy every bit of time you get. That’s what makes other magic friends so valuable, there are some permanent players on your team.” He let his hand linger under her jaw, pulling her face closer to his, “You have me. We have each other. We’re family. We always have been.”

“So I hate to interrupt, but, waffles.” The server put the plates she had been holding down onto the table. Douxie and Y/n pulled away from each other quick as lightning, sitting up straight in their seats. “Again, sorry guys.”

“Thank you.” The two chorused to their fleeting form in embarrassment. Their faces were fire engine red. Archie was right, they did get a little carried away with the pda. It may have been 12:28am in a waffle house but they were still in public. Grabby hands needed to be kept to themselves.

After dinner, neither Doux nor Y/n could bring themselves to go home quite yet, despite the nagging feeling to return to Nari. They loitered around woods, unsure of what to do. Leaning against the parked boat, Douxie got an idea. He put on the music on his phone, turning the volume all the way up and positioning it so it’d put out a better sound the best he could. The playlist he selected was actually the one he had of songs that reminded him of his beloved. Copying what Y/n had done last night, he held out his hand.

“Come on, dance with me, My Darling.”

Douxie twirled Y/n around in the night breeze that blew through the trees. This song was much faster than the one they danced to last time, and there was more energy between them. Y/n’s laugh echoed through the forest. This was a lot of fun, she could do it all night. Honestly, she could do anything all night if it was with Douxie. He lifted her up, like she weighed nothing. Seriously, how strong was this noodle armed wizard. She threw her arms around his neck, looking down to meet his eyes, a rare thing. Y/n kissed his nose, eliciting a happy giggle from his mouth.

He should have put her back down by now. Instead, he still held her up, transfixed by her face ringed in moonlight, like a halo. She noticed the awestruck look on his face, kissing him properly, yet it did nothing to pull him out of his stupor. He had one thought running over and over in his mind. Marry me. But, he couldn’t say that. A proposal had to be special, not after a waffle house date. Their first date, mind you. He couldn’t possibly jus-

“Marry me, Dewdrop?”

Well apparently he couldn’t but she absolutely could.

It took him a moment to take in her words, shocked out of his overthinking. The biggest grin spread across his face as he giddily spun her around in his arms. He finally put her feet back on the ground, crashing his lips into hers. Y/n brought a hand up to drag through his hair and left the other to slide down his back. No battle for dominance, Douxie’s tongue was definitely the one leading here. He just couldn’t believe it. It was if she had read his mind. It was still hard for him to believe she wanted him in the first place, but this much? If this was the afterlife he must surely be in heaven. One makeout session later, Y/n rasped “So I’m guessing that’s a yes?”

“Let’s sign the papers tomorrow.”

~ ~ ~

Despite the uneasy feeling they had both had about leaving Nari alone for so long, she was perfectly fine. In fact she hadn’t even moved an inch form the spot they left her in. Like they never left at all. Archie was asleep on that couch, as peaceful as ever. They’d tell him the news in the morning.

Y/n climbed into the nest and dragged Douxie down with her. After getting comfy on the array of cushions, he opened his arms and she nestled into his chest. She could feel his hands rest on her back. Perfect. It was calming, listening to his heartbeat, being lulled to sleep with the rhythm that gave proof that her beloved was alive. A steady beat that reassured her he was there, he was there. He wouldn’t leave her again.

*** check notes for chapter illustrations lmao

[itstittycitybaby]

Flirty (Lin Beifong x Reader) Part 2

 a/n: had to start typing this as soon as I finished episode 5. holy fuck. im. im just not okay. as im putting the tags to post this i just wanna say. i cannot keep waiting. im gonna fucking explode.

Lin’s fist clenched tightly around the fork she was holding. Her lips were pulled into a frown and her green eyes narrowed dangerously. No one at the table paid her any mind as they chatted amongst themselves. Better than having the avatar throwing more questions at her.

Lin glared into the food in front of her. Suyin’s chef might be a good one, but that didn’t stop Lin from being spiteful. She’d rather starve than eat her sister’s food. “Lin,” her sister started, a frown over her face. “If you keep staring daggers into your plate you’ll burn it.” 

She scoffed, “Just like how you burned our family to the ground.” “Not this again,” Suyin murmured, closing her eyes and rubbed her temples with her fingers. Lin felt Korra’s gaze. She could tell the avatar wanted to say something, but thought better of it. Korra was never the one to mind her damn business. None of the imbeciles were.

Everyone fell silent as they heard the door open. They all went slack jawed at the man in front of them. Lin needed a drink. “Varrick?” Asami looked at the man quizzingly. “Hey everyone,” he answered cheerfully. Everyone besides Lin stared at the man dumbfounded. She stabbed her fork into her food with force but no one seemed to notice.

Zarrick informed everyone as they ate about Suyin’s oh so great hospitality and the second chance she had given him. It made Lin want to laugh but she chose to stare a hole into his head.

“Alright enough,” Lin yelled, slamming her fists down onto the table. “I’m trying to keep the avatar safe and you’re harboring a criminal?!” Lin couldn’t believe it. The nerve of her sister to bring them here and force her to eat dinner. Suyin knew what she had done. And Lin hadn’t even been given a damn apology.

“Ease up Lin,” Suyin said softly. “Varrick’s made a few mistakes in his past. It doesn’t mean he should pay for it for the rest of his life. People change.”

“You haven’t,” Lin spat out. The room fell silent. They all watched her nervously, anticipating her next move. Suyin looked unfazed by Lin’s outburst. She hated the eyes staring at her, picking her apart. She felt like a damn kid again. “What are you looking at,” Lin barked, leaving her seat. She flung the chair with her hands, pushing it onto the ground. It clattered onto the floor. Out of the corner of Lin’s eye Asami flinched. Shaking her head she dashed towards the door.

“Sorry I’m late guys, I was busy-” Lin snapped her head up. You. Your voice. You were here. The door shut with a muffled sound behind you. Your eyes widened and there were two birds on your shoulders. They squwaked amongst themselves and fluttered about. The birds were distressed. A travel bag hung on your back and there were scrolls of paper sticking out at the top. 

“So glad you could join us,” Suyin said cheerfully. “Lin,” you whispered. A smile stretched your face and your eyes were shushed with tears. Lin’s eyes were wide with surprise. Her throat started to choke up and close. Your smile dropped and your brows furrowed in concern at the tears in her eyes.  Lin swept past you and a metal cable wrapped around the door, slamming it behind her.

*****

The food was delicious. “This is so good,” you said, mouthfuls between food. Suyin chuckled, “Good. Was getting here easy?” You shrugged, as you devoured a roll. The buttery taste and the fluffy texture made you moan. “It was okay I guess. Paragliding was half the journey.” Suyin’s brows furrowed and she rested her hand on your shoulder. “If I had known you were paragliding I would’ve come for you myself.” “It’s fine,” you reassured her, taking a gulp of your water. “I was out in the middle of nowhere anyway.”

“You were always one to isolate yourself. (Y/N), meet avatar Korra.” You peeked around Suyin. There, a fit younger girl sat beside Suyin. She waved at you, “Hi! It’s nice to meet you.” You grinned, sending her a wink. Her cheeks turned slightly pink, causing you to chuckle. “I’m (Y/). Inventor, architect, and old friend of the Beifongs.” 

“The (Y/N)?” You turned to the excited voice. A slightly chubbier man looked at you with his green eyes, twinkling with excitement. “Yup. The very same.” “You’re the one who made the probending arena!” You smiled, “You’re right! Not one of my proudest creations.” “Nonsense, “ Suyin tutted. “Without you there wouldn’t be a probending arena. Give yourself some credit.” You smirked, “Always the flatterer Suyin. There’s a couple things I would like to make enhancements on. Though, I won’t have the chance.”

The younger man sighed sadly. “I wish we could still do it?” “We?” “Uh yea! Me and my brother were pro bending for a while. Won the tournaments thanks to Korra!” You flickered between Korra and him. “I bet you three were amazing!” He nodded enthusiastically, “The very best!” “I don’t know about that Bolin,” a man with dark hair and soft brown eyes interjected.

“You must be the brother,” you mused, eyes glittering with amusement. “Yea. I’m Mako. He’s Bolin,” he confirmed, jutting his thumb and gesturing between the two of them. “Mako and Bolin,” you murmured. “Great to meet you!” 

*****

After dinner you went to find Lin. Suyin offered for you to tag along with her and Korra to her study to chat. You declined politely, but promised the two of you would catch up soon. You shivered as the cool air hit your face. The cold had never been one of your strong suits. It was something Lin used to tease you about. Lin. You hoped she was okay. Seeing her again made your heart ache. It was a slap in the face of what could’ve been. If you hadn’t been so selfish, it could’ve gone differently. Now she was tougher than you’d ever seen her. What had happened while you were gone? Azure and Ruby were already sleeping in your room for the night. You promised Opal that you’d introduce the two of them to her tomorrow. She seemed so excited and happy to hold them. It made your aching heart feel a bit better to know that someone appreciated them. Bo and Bao would’ve loved this place.

“Is that a blue parakeet?” Your eyes snapped to a younger girl sitting by Bolin. She too had green eyes and black hair that framed her face. Her feautures resembled Suyin’s. “Mhm,” you confirmed, digging into the desert with your spoon. “This is Azure. He’s very...demanding,” you grumbled. Azure hopped on your shoulder and sunk his talons in. You hissed, sending him a glare. The girl giggled, awing Ruby as she stayed put on the table. “I’ve alway liked parakeets,” she said softly. “I’ve never seen one in person.” “Well, would you like to hold him?” “Really?!” Her green eyes lit up and an excited smile streched her face. “Totally!” “Now now Opal,” Suyin chided, “You’ll have time for that later. We still have some things to discuss.”

*****

Lin couldn’t believe it. You were here. It had been so long and you just...showed up....out of the blue. She choked on her tears as the memories came rushing back. You had left her. You wanted to go travel and learn more knowledge about the world. After all this time, after all these years, Lin still loved you. That’s what scared her the most. She loved you. Even when she had dated Tenzin Lin still wanted you. The feelings never went away, no matter how hard she tried to suppress it. All these emotions were bubbling up and she couldn’t bring herself to stop it. Lin felt sick and tired. Confronting her emotions and facing the past was like shoving her hand down her throat and pulling out her entrails.

Seeing Suyin again and being forced to remember the scar that haunted her  was difficult enough. Then, the spirits had to add bringing her ex lover into her life. The one that got away. Her fingers clenched the newspaper tightly. It crinkled among the edges from the tight grip Lin held. Her vision blurred from the tears that threatened to fall. Not now, we aren’t going to cry about this anymore.

The sound of her door opening made her snap up. Korra and Suyin’s daughter, Opal, stood at the door. Lin sighed, setting the newspaper down onto the coffee table. Hopefully, they weren’t able to see the tears in her eyes. Rising up from her chair, Lin turned to look at them. “What is it now,” Lin huffed, crossing her arms. Opal’s gaze shifted nervously to Korra and then to Lin. “Out with it.” 

“I’m...sorry being here is very hard for you...but I appreciate it,” the girl started, sending a nervous smile towards Lin. “When I had heard you were here I was excited. I’ve heard so much about you and I would like to get to know you more.” She came closer to Lin and fidgeted with her hands. She bit her lip nervously and carefully chose her words. “I know my family can be...crazy and ..overwhelming sometimes. But I would like for you to be a part of it.”

Silence. Opal shifted nervously and swallowed, waiting for Lin’s answer. “Get out.” She snapped up, facing Lin. “What?” “Get. Out.” Her eyes filled with tears and Opal’s lip quivered. She swept past Korra and left.

“What the hell is your problem,” Korra snapped, hands waving around for emphasis. The anger in Lin’s veins threatened to snap. Her chest felt hot and there was a prickling sensation inside of her. Lin tittered over the edge of the cliff. She was already angry and hurt. She didn’t want to accidentally hurt Korra. “Why don’t you focus on fixing the world instead of my family’s problems,” Lin seethed, eyes narrowing into a dangerous glare. The air sunk thickly between the avatar and Lin. 

“Su was right,” Korra said softly. Her fists clenched as she looked to the ground. “You’re never gonna change.” Korra settled her blue eyes on Lin and glared. “You’re always going to be a bitter old, lonely woman.” She turned and left quietly. Lin faced the wall, turning her back to the door. The tears she tried so hard to fight were flowing freely down her cheeks. Lin choked on a whimper and brought her hands to her face. Once again, she weeped over her family. The loss of the love and warmth she once had. Once again, she cried over you.

****

Opal ran past you crying. You fought the urge to go after her. She was a bright girl who was very sweet. But right now you had to find Lin. You could comfort Opal tomorrow. Pace set into a jog, you got closer to what you assumed was your destination. There was a door open and light poured out onto the pavement. Your instincts screamed at you to hide or run. Instead, you crouched and crept your way towards the mysterious door. You furrowed your brows and pulled out one of the daggers strapped to your thigh. The combat boots you had on were silent against the pavement and you hid in the shadows. Still got it, you couldn’t help but think smugly.

“You’re always going to be a bitter old, lonely woman.” Your breath hitched. Korra. Rage. The rage blinded you from the colour of red. It slammed into your vision and the silence rang in your ears. The sound of footsteps shook you out of it. Jumping out into the open, you put away your dagger. “Y/N?” You curled your lips at the avatar’s voice. Punching her into the ground wouldn’t do you any good. It didn’t stop you from imagining it. “Avatar,” you responded, curtly, pushing past her. Your teeth were gritted and your fists were clenched. How dare she talk to Lin like that? Korra sighed, having enough bullshit today and shook it off.

If you thought seeing Lin hurt, the sight in front of you crumbled your heart into pieces. The door closed softly behind you, not making a sound. Your boots were soundless as you made your away to her trembling form. Lin’s posture tensed at the feeling of another presence there with her. She snapped her head to you. Her eyes were red and there were tears falling on her cheeks.The redness and the tears made her beautiful green eyes shine more. “What,” Lin snapped, “Come here to mock me? Tell me I should forgive Suyin and make friends with her? That I’m weak and insufferable?”

“Oh Lin,” you sighed, voice slightly breaking. Her eyes bulged. There were tears in your eyes as you sank down with her. “What happened to you?” Lin didn’t say anything as she studied your face. There was warmth and concern simmering in your eyes. You were still as beautiful as the day you left. “I’m so sorry Lin. You deserved better.”

The fresh tears fell. I’m sorry. Lin choked a sob. Spreading your arms wide, you pulled her into a tight embrace. The black crop top you wore was soft against Lin’s cheek. She laid against your red trousers and cried. “I’m here Lin, I’m here,” you whispered into her hair while rocking her back and forth.

Lin sniffled, “You left me. You left me.” You bit your trembling lip and swallowed the lump in your throat. “I know. And I’m so sorry Lin. But I’m here. I’m here to stay.” A sob clawed its way out of Lin’s throat. You smelt just the same as you always had. “Why are you here,” she croaked, shifting to look into your eyes. That’s when Lin noticed the scars on your face. A nasty one that cut through you lip and another one through your brow. Your eyes drifted to the scar on her cheek. Cupping her face gently you ghosted your fingers across it. Your soft touches made Lin’s eyes water even more. “I wanted to talk to you. But now’s not a good time huh?” Lin chuckled, despite the tears. “Always one for bad timings Flirty.” A huff of laughter left your lips. “I guess some things never change.”

Lin didn’t say anything. The two of you stared into each other. Your heart pounded and your hands started to feel a little clammy. Maybe the two of you had a chance? “What is it you want to talk about?” Lin’s body was awkward against your smaller frame. Your legs were folded under her and Lin’s body was turned at a weird angle. It was a bit uncomfortable, but you wouldn’t have it any other way.

“Another time,” you murmured softly. “Right now you should get some sleep.” Lin nodded and you let her go so she could get up. Taking this as your cue to leave, you slowly got up. Your joints ached and your ass throbbed from the sitting on the floor An “oof” left your lips. Lin laughed softly, “Not as young as you used to be.” You smiled, “But still damn sexy.”

Lin snorted and rolled her eyes. She headed to where you assumed was her bedroom. You shifted awkwardly before deciding to leave. It was your cue right? Besides, it was a weird situation to be in. Yet, it still felt so normal.

“Stay. Please.” You turned around, hand hovering over the door handle. “You want me to stay.” Lin sighed, “Just..forget it.” “No!” She turned to you waiting expectantly. “I was just...surprised is all,” you mumbled. “I-I didn’t think you’d want me to stay.” Lin’s brows furrowed, “Of course I want you to stay. Why wouldn’t I?” Because I still love you. And I’m pretty sure you don’t love me too. “Dunno,” you said. A grin stretched across your face. A perfect time to change the subject. “Beifong, if you wanted me to sleep over you could’ve just asked.” 

Lin sighed, rolling her eyes. You could see the slight pinkish colour that bloomed on her cheeks. Crossing her arms she gruffed out, “You’re sleeping on the couch.” “Got it Chief,” you replied, saluting. “Don’t make me regret it.” You smiled at her and nodded. The corner of Lin’s lips twitched up but she kept her face neutral. “Night Lin,” you said softly, settling down onto the couch. 

“Goodnight.”

[vanchlo]

The Assistant / Chapter Forty-Three, “The One Where It Happens”

*Gifs not mine*

Clickable Links:

- *NEW* Becky Magazine Cover from an O.C. Tag Challenge

- Masterlist feat. all chapters and Character Surveys

- Inspo tag

- Hecky Playlist

- Read on Wattpad

Word Count: 12.3k words

Warnings: Sensitive topics

Music Inspo: Lay Down Beside You by Carl Storm (click to listen, this song is too perfect for this chapter)

                                         SNEAKYYYYY PEEK

I worry. I fear. I cry. I doubt. I struggle for breath. I grieve. I sob. I ache. Because I love. No, not loved. I love.

Love is what makes me want to go back to her, and cover her broken body with kisses. Love is what scares the living shit out of me, preventing me from doing that in this very second, because I’m afraid that I’ll break her all the more. Love is what sends the words tumbling off of my aching lips.

“‘m alright if yer alright, Becks . . . B-But ‘m not alright.”

Life has many ways of testing a person’s will - either by having nothing happen at all, or by having everything happen at once.

- Paulo Coelho 

+

Today had seemed like a dream, and I was unsure of when I’d get used to that, or when I’d get used to all of this. If I never did, I’d be okay with that, because she just keeps amazing me with every step I take. I never want this dream to end, if it is one after all.  

Speak of an angel, and there she is, I think. The thought races to the front of my mind, pushing all of the others aside. She’s always managed to be very good at doing that, I recall. 

“I’m gonna get going then,” she announces, clasping her milky 

white hands together in front of her after walking back into my office. 

A sad smile finds its way to my lips as I admire her, wishing I could spend the rest of my days memorizing every detail of her. The little tan birthmark beneath her eye that she doesn’t cover up anymore, much to my happy findings. The sparkle in her eyes, the left one scattered with more indigo flecks. The always waves in her dark chocolate hair. Her braided silver ring that I’ve never seen her without, always playing with it mindlessly. 

“Harry?” she hums. I blink, focusing my eyes back on her. 

Becks. My lovely Becks. Maybe even . . my girlfriend? Impossible although it had seemed, my lips reach higher elevations on my cheeks at the thought. I don’t let it run away from me, although I’m itching to let the question leave my lips. 

There’s always tomorrow for that, I decide silently as I adore the invisible inquisition toying with her eyebrows. 

“Alright?” Becks asks, taking another step forward until she arrives at my desk. 

“Ya, ‘m great,” I confess softly, pushing at the lip of my desk to get to my feet. 

“Why are you looking at me like that?” she ponders nervously, a fire sparking in her cheeks as I near her figure dressed in a sleek black pantsuit. A cream chiffon blouse falls under the hollow of her neck modestly, adorned by the opal necklace I haven’t seen her take off since our first date. Yet another confirmation that that night was real, and so is all of this. My bloody God, I wonder when I’ll ever be able to believe it. 

“I dunno,” I giggle, my hands finding their way into the conversation with a shrug of their own. “Jus’ so happy lookin’ at you . . You make me happy, Becks . . Very.”

The dimple finds its place in her left cheek again, and I know then that I’m fucked all the more. A similar sound flows from her lips, and I wish it didn’t have to come to an end as my palm slips into hers. 

“You make me happy too, Harry, so happy,” she titters, peeking up at me with those goddamn blue eyes. The very blues that could send me whizzing off into another oblivion, and I’d feel honored for it. I’m given just enough time to catch the glint in her eye, wetness sitting there in the corner before she looks away again. “Today made me so happy.”

“Me too, bug. I can hardly believe I get t’ do this e’ry day . . with you,” I snicker happily, tugging on her hand until my arms are surrounding her shoulders. 

“Neither can I,” she concurs, the words tickling the skin peeking out from my hardly buttoned shirt. A second of wetness tickles the skin there when my hand comes to cup the back of her head, pressing a kiss below my thumb a moment later. 

“Call me when ya get home, will you? We should FaceTime and watch anotha episode, if yer not gettin’ too sick o’ me yet.”

“Never,” she sighs, nudging my chin towards the sky when she lifts her head. It falls now, to find her moist blue eyes searching for me. It plummets further until my lips catch the hint of a tear at the corner of her eye, kissing it away. “I could never get sick of you.”

“‘s gonna be quite a long time befo’ I get sick o’ you, bug,” I murmur against her cheek, the traces of orange blossoms marking her skin. I can almost taste it on my lips when I leave a kiss there. 

“I’m not going anywhere,” she says, yanking my eyes to her grinning lips that I envelop with my own. A ‘good’ brushes against her pair between moments of adoring her top lip between mine. The tip of her nose leaves lazy circles drawn on my skin while I sketch my own onto her creamy skin. The moment couldn’t last long enough. I wish I could freeze it in time and enjoy it for longer before my lungs begin to burn for air. 

“Drive safe,” I whisper against her mouth, saying goodbyes into her hair with the motions of my thumb. 

“I will, don’t worry. I’ll call you when I get home, it shouldn’t take me even fifteen minutes to get there.”

“‘Kay, ‘ll talk t’ you soon then,” I smile, touching my lips to her button nose. “Boops.” 

“Now, don’t stay here too long, boss. You’re going to turn into a workaholic or something, Harry,” Becks taunts with her flushed lips drawing me in. 

“‘ll try not t’, that’s all I can promise.”

A laugh joins her answering nod before she surprises me with one last kiss, making me want to take back all of the words I just said, and spend a few more moments kissing her. Minutes, maybe. 

“Night, Harry.”

“G’night, Becks. ‘ll talk t’ ya later . . my love,” I divulge, enjoying the pink that rises in her cheeks at the mention of the simple words. Simple, yet oh so true. 

“Bye, my Harry,” she echoes, squeezing my hand one last time on her way out the door. Her azul blue eyes meet mine over her shoulder when she pulls my door closed, decadent lips curled into a smile just for me. Lips that I already want to have touching my own again, dark chocolate waves I want to be losing my hands in, and that laugh I want to be pulling from her lips. 

It’s never long enough with her, but I get to do today all over again with her tomorrow. The day after that, and after that. Stolen kisses in the copier room, her head on my shoulder while watching FRIENDS at my desk, those pretty fingers dancing along my tense shoulders, and a closeness between us that I’ve longed to have for so long. Too long. 

A closeness with her that I never want to lose.

+

The very last unanswered email is whisked away with a whoosh. Finally, I have that done. With it, it drags my eyes to my wrist that vibrates with an alert. A premature smile graces my lips until it falls at the sight of a different name, not the one I was expecting. 

“What’s takin’ her so long?” I mutter as my eyes flit over Myles’ text, some joke about firing me if I keep staying past five o’clock. 

“Bastard,” I sigh with a shake of my head, pressing my palm to the screen as the time repeats in my head. 

5:26 passes. 

Then, 5:36 passes too as I wait for her to reply to my texts, or to call.

Reckon she should’ve been home by now, having left at 5, I wonder silently, aware of the thrumming of my heart. I’m sure she’s just making something to eat. 

Yeah, Harry, that’s it. 

Why am I worrying so much? 5 o’clock traffic is a bitch, anyways. It’s what made me late to our date the other night, so I should know. 

“She’ll call soon,” I mumble aloud, crafting a quick text to her, adding to the others I’ve already sent her tonight.

i think today may have been my favourite w/ u so far ;) xo

hurry up slowpoke

rebecca ann ur slow. im kiddin. drive safe bug xo

Sighing, I turn back to my iMac where I already have the next episode of FRIENDS queued up, waiting for her. 

A new bloop! sounds when an email arrives in my inbox. Clicking on it, I begin to absorb the words until my office phone interrupts with a loud bringggggg! 

“This ‘s Harry,” I say automatically, and am answered with an eerie silence. A darkness trickles into my chest at the little sounds accompanying it. The pangs of worry return, demanding to be felt amongst the mix of it all. “Hullo?” 

“H-Harry, this is Skye,” a shaky voice replies at last. 

“Hi, what’re you doin’ callin’ me main line?” I joke, hoping to add a lightness to the atmosphere that so direly requires one. The fear threatening at my edges gains strength when I make out the likeness of it in her voice. “If yer lookin’ fer Becks she left half an hour ago, reckon she’s home by now.”

“No, s-she’s not,” she says. I hear it, and I immediately wish that I hadn’t. Denying it with a shake of my head, it doesn’t disappear that easily, the crack in her voice. “She . . d-didn’t make it home, Harry.”

“What’re ya talkin’ ‘bout, Skye? I jus’ saw her half an hour ago,” I contend, rushing through my words as my back straightens to full attention. 

“I know . . I just talked to her on the phone f-fifteen minutes ago, but Harry . . ,” Skye continues, words wandering away from her. They’re kidnapped by the tears that I finally acknowledge in her voice, and now echoing on the line. “S-She was in . . an accident.”

“What . . What kinda accident? ‘s she alright? W-Who told you this? That can’t be right, I jus’ saw her,” I argue, losing my footing quite immediately. 

Rising to my feet, the words are too close for comfort and my knees threaten to give out on me. A hand races to my hair, carding heavy strokes through it that tug hairs loose, but I disregard the pain. Another form of it demands to be felt inside of me, next to my heart that climbs in speed with every moment absent of words. An absence of Becks being okay. 

“I don’t want it to be real either, Harry, b-but an officer just rang me. H-He said a car ran a light and h-hit her . . not long after I got off the phone with her. It was right behind the driver’s side and . . it doesn’t look very good,” she reveals, sobs growing thicker in her voice. My feet run rampant circles around my office as my fingers tug violently at my hair. 

“This ‘sn’t funny, Skye, if yer pullin’ me leg,” I begin with a forced amusement, but it doesn’t make it very far. I don’t make it that far until I fall onto the sofa, my words crashing into loud sobs that steal my breath away. “I jus’ got her back . . I can’t lose her ‘gain,” the confession comes, drenched in tears that shake my body. 

“I know,” she agrees with echoing devastation as tears paint the inside of my palm clung to my face. “She’s been my best friend for t-twenty-one years, Harry. I-I can’t imagine my life without her, and I know she’d never want to imagine a life without you.”

My head shakes rapidly from side to side as the tepid wetness paints stripes down my cheeks, escaping from my eyes that I press shut painfully. Whimpers flee from my lips, the very ones that were just kissing hers thirty minutes prior. 

This can’t be happening. No, I can’t lose my Becks when she just found her way back to me. 

“No, no . . no, no,” I sob, each utterance becoming more indiscernible with the emotions consuming them. “Not my Becks,” I mutter, air escaping my lungs with such force that leaves me dizzy in the head. 

“She’ll be okay, she’s strong, Harry. She’s made it through so much other shit. N-Not this sort, but . . . she broke her leg riding bike one time when we were eight, and she was fine. S-She cut her finger cooking once and drove herself to hospital all herself,” Skye reveals, the trembling words doing nothing to calm my heart that I’m afraid may bound from my chest at a moment’s notice. 

“Strongest person I know,” I concur, a hiccup rattling my voice that fights for composure. “W-What’d they tell you . . ‘bout Becks?”

“They’re taking her to uh, King’s Cross hospital. Reckon there’ll be a waiting room I can meet you at while s-she’s in . . surgery,” Skye explains, and my head rushes up and down with nods now. I shakily get to my feet and take a step towards my door, but once again, I don’t make it far. A wooziness falls over me, and I grab the arm of the sofa just in time to recover. “They said they stabilized her and she was breathing and everything, b-but surgery was in order. Car was totaled, though. That’s not good . . No, that’s not good,” she cries, words falling harder and harder the more she goes on. With every one that she speaks, my sobs thicken and louden against the confines of my palm. 

“Don’t say that . . D-Don’t, she’s gonna be okay. She has t’ be,” I defend, wishing more with every second that I believed my own words. If the words themselves could wish it into existence, I’d speak them over and over until it came true. 

“I’m sorry,” she confesses breathlessly. “I’ll uh, meet you there. C-Call me when you get there. It’s the . . hospital on the west side of town, not too far from you, I reckon. She’s probably . . already there,” Skye finishes before the dial tone drills into my ears, and I’m left listening to my unsteady breaths. 

The phone plummets from my hand to meet the floor with a crrrrrunching sound, but I don’t even care. There’s so little I care about in this moment, because my thoughts are consumed by her. They’re racing, demanding, and making me sick. My chest trembles with another intense sob as my palms press against my eyes. Strands of my hair are taut around my fingertips, my scalp searing with pain. 

She’s become all I’ve cared about in these last few weeks, and it’s been magnified within moments now.

“No,” I cry, salt water dripping over my lips and plummeting from my chin. “Becks, no.”

Sniffling, it’s suddenly impossible to ignore the rock sitting in my gut. Jumping to my feet, my hands fall as I cross the room and fall to my knees harshly. The cold, granite tiles dig into my boney limbs as I retch into the bin. Grouting in the tiles leaves marks on my skin when I wipe the back of my hand across my mouth moments later. 

Sweat beads on my forehead as the room spins around me. Tears press harshly at the back of my eyes when I envision her standing in front of me, kissing me goodbye just moments ago, it seemed. Shakes overwhelm my body within seconds, and my knees kiss the tiles once more. The coolness is welcomed by my flushed forehead as I curl into myself, her smiling face captivating every thought I have while my body convulses with a new sob. It takes the last ounces of strength I can find to pull myself up to a kneeling position, then to plant one foot against the floor, and another until I’m standing. 

“‘m comin’, Becks,” I mumble, voice breaking from the first word. Wiping under my eyes, I rip open the door. Feet pounding down the hallway, I sniffle as another warm stripe cascades down my cheeks. A second and third accompany it when I pass her office, and I yank my eyes away, knowing that I can’t look. I’ll collapse to the floor again if I see her name sitting there on the door, waiting for her to return tomorrow morning. 

Patting my pockets hastily, I yank my ring of keys from the fabric only to drop them. Cursing, I bend down to pick them up before rounding the corner. I’m almost knocked off my feet by Myles who skids to a halt. Unbeknownst to me, I didn’t think I could be hurting more until I found the look that dawns on his face. 

“Hare, what’s wrong?” he demands, grabbing my bicep. 

A sob revokes my words and a hand flies to my mouth. Eyebrows falling, tears interrupt my voice as the explanation plays on a loop between my ears. 

“Becks, s-she . . ,” I try to say, but a shake of my head places a gap in between my words. “Was inn’a accident. I have t’ go t’ her . . tha hospital. I wanna be there when she wakes up, and-,” now, I cut myself off abruptly. Tears blur my vision, and soon I’m seeing stripes. A feeling surrounds me, and I find that it’s his arms crushing me in a hug. His name drops from my lips in a choked sob. 

“You’re not driving anywhere like this. I’ll take ya, Hare,” he murmurs into my ear, out of place back rubbing following his words. “I’m so bloody sorry, mate. Fuck, I just saw her when she left.”

“So did I. H-How can it be real? I just . . . I jus’ got her back, My’. She jus’ came back t’ me and we jus’ started datin’ finally . . I can’t fookin’ lose her all over ‘gain, not fer real this time . . I don’t think I could live inn’a world that she’s not in, Myles,” I confess into his shoulder, clutching onto him. My chest expands and falls against his, convulsing with every worst case scenario that sends tears flying from my eyes. 

“It’ll be okay.”

“Don’t fookin’ say that, ‘coz what if it ‘s not? What if she’s not okay? What if she . . d-dies, My’? I can’t-,” the words run away from me, and for once, I’m thankful for it. They’re drenched by too much reality, more than I can stomach.

I don’t remember following him down to the parking garage, or getting into the car. The next thing I know, my head is tipped against the frosty glass window in his BMW, the lights of London cloudy from behind my eyes. 

“I jus’ bloody saw her, and I kissed her and hugged her,” I whisper, watching the words fog up the glass, if only for mere seconds. A warm tear dives from my chin, crashing onto the v of my chest. 

‘I knows’ answer me back, as well as squeezes to my arms when I least expect them. It all runs into a blur - the traffic, snow fluttering against the windows, and the pounds of tears I shed into the air. Most of all, the thoughts running rampant within me hardly make much sense by the time we’ve parked. The one thing that’s clear as day is how my heart swells with bittersweetness when her face swims inside of my skull, and the love that pours out from it for her. 

I already know that I love her, and it only makes me hurt a million times worse. 

“She’ll likely be in surgery for a good while, it’s a rather long affair, Hare,” Myles announces as the automatic sliding doors open for us, greeting us with a burst of hot air. 

“I know . . Skye said she’s in tha waitin’ room erm, on tha second floor,” I respond, reading from my phone. My eyes fill with more tears as I swipe a finger under the both of them, sniffling. 

“Here, I see a lift.”

Relief ironically escapes me when we finally find Skye bouncing her legs up and down in a chair, arms wrapped around herself as she stares at the floor. It takes her a moment to look up after saying her name, but with her disarray of colorful hair, I reckon she’s the best person I can relate to on this entire floor. 

“Hey,” I whisper when I embrace her, surprising myself at the same time. A shy ‘hi’ fills my ears as her thin frame greets mine. Her shaking arms squeeze me around the middle, and I linger there for a few seconds than necessary before pulling away. “Has anybody came t’ talk t’ you?”

“No, not yet. I just checked in with somebody when I came in, and they said to come up here. S-So, I did, and the nurse’s desk told me somebody would come when they have news. Whenever that is,” she sighs, flicking a thumb below her eye to catch a tear that strays from her waterline. 

“D-Did ya call Robbie and her dad?” 

“Yeah, just now. Robbie should be here soon, and Chuck was just about to leave . . I figure he won’t get here until she’s out of surgery, even though we don’t know how bloody long that’ll take. But, he’ll be here i-in a few hours,” she answers, her voice catching on the last of her words. 

“I’m gonna go and find us something to drink,” Myles interrupts, nodding his head down the hallway. I mirror his actions, grateful for the offer as I clear my scratchy throat. It dried up the second those very words rocked me to the core. 

Silence ensues as I fall onto the lumpy sofa beside her, a telly across the room murmuring softly in the background. Magazines lie open in front of us on the wooden table, chairs and more chairs surrounding us. 

“I wish somebody would just tell us something,” she groans beside me, wringing her hands in her lap. A sob stills in her throat and I watch her face collapse along with it. 

“I can go and ask, ‘m antsy too. Only been here a minute and already I am,” I suggest with a tough swallow. The lump in my throat greets me again as she shakes her head ‘no.’ 

Folding my hands together, they come to sit against my mouth as I now bounce my knee. Eyes flitting in every direction, I will a nurse or doctor littering the halls to wander over to us with their bloody clipboard and lab coat. 

“Find anythin’ else out tho’?” I pipe up, dropping a hand and letting it squeeze hers. I’ve only met this woman a handful of times, and yet, I know that she’s the closest thing I’ve got to a friend here. She’s the only other person who could understand how I’m feeling right now, because she’s the only other person in this damn hospital who loves Becky too. At the same time, my actions are unprecedented and alien to me, this entire situation is. 

Tears arrive in my eyes as I wait for her voice to make a choppy return, “Just when I got here and checked in, s-so to speak, that she was in surgery. They didn’t say what for really, I suppose only the team working on- with her knows,” she explains, and now, I’m the one nodding. A long breath spills from my lips, and it does next to nothing to calm the thrashing of my heart, and the onslaught of my mind. 

The reality of the situation brings my head into my palms again where I spill silent tears, accentuated by the whimpers of my lips. My entire body shakes with every sob, every sob that yearns for my arms to return to her. My eyes to see hers again, those baby blues that now, I can’t stop imagining my babies having one day. That painful thought makes them come harder now while I struggle for air, lungs burning for other reasons now, like nonexistent children that I very well may never have with her now.

Fuck. 

I wish more than anything that I could be back in my office an hour ago, annoying her with kisses as she finished up an email. What I’d do to have my lungs burning in need of the air filling hers, and not for the air around me that may not even hold her life anymore. 

No, I can’t think like that. If I entertain that thought for a millisecond, there’s no going back. 

“You know, you’re her whole world and always have been. She couldn’t shut up about you lately, a-and all of your dates. When I spoke to her on the phone r-right before . . . she was saying how amazing of a day she had had . . with you. She couldn’t wait to do it all over again, she’s so mad about you, Harry. S-She even wrote you this letter once saying how she-,” Skye divulges, the words filling my ears. Instantaneously, they want nothing more than to spit them back out. 

“Don’t! Don’t say all o’ that. D-Don’t say it in past tense, or like she’s not . . g-gonna be able t’ tell me all ‘bout it. We can’t act that way . . She’s gonna be okay, she’s gotta be okay,” I insist into my hands, struggling for breaths. Lifting my head, I turn it away from her and towards the window, my lips squashed into a line. Briny tears drip over them as I squeeze my eyes shut tightly, hiccups finding their way into the air. 

“I’m sorry, I-.”

“I c-can’t talk ‘bout her like she’s- like that. I can’t t-think ‘bout her like that . . her not bein’ here anymo’,” I exclaim, shooting to my feet in order to change directions. 

I thought I couldn’t believe my life earlier today and the direction it’d taken, and now, I can’t believe it one bit. I don’t want to, and I wish I didn’t have to. I thought that I was living a dream today, and now, I know that I’m living a nightmare. I didn’t want to wake up earlier, but I need to now, more than anything. 

I want to open my eyes and find her curled against my chest, snoring peacefully with her body warming mine. Like last night, a moment I could live in for forever. 

A vibrating in my pocket barges into my thoughts, and I’m unsure whether to welcome it as I reach for it. The same ringtone by The Cure sings from around my wrist, and my heart only falls deeper when I see the name claiming it. It sends a wave of relief throughout my body, but it only lasts a few seconds. The only name that could make it permanent is far from an option, and here I am, still wishing for it with my own two eyes. I wish that she wasn’t in an operating room somewhere in this same building, and instead her voice was singing from my phone. That’s how it was supposed to be, anyways. 

“Mum,” I answer softly, steps halting in the hallway. A sob freezes in my chest at the thought of having to speak truth into the nightmare I’m living. 

“Harry honey, what’s tha matta?” my mum responds, worry rocking her voice. 

“‘s Becks. She-,” I confess, but I can’t say it. I want nothing more than to say something else. When she asks if she’s alright, I want to say yes, and it sends wobbles down my legs knowing that I can’t say that. I can’t say it, because I don’t know it. 

“It’s okay, love, take a deep breath.”

“I can’t,” I weep, a wail escaping my lips, muffled by my palm. The tear stained skin flies to my hair that I tug at, ignoring the throb of my head hitting the wall of the hallway. “I can’t breathe, mum . . I can’t not knowin’ if she ‘s okay.”

“Oh, darlin’. What happened to her?”

“She w-was . . . inn’a car accident,” I admit breathlessly, sucking in lungfuls of air that don’t do a thing. A fire still lives deep down inside of my chest, and it was born the moment I heard Skye speak those words. “‘m at tha hospital now waitin’ t’ hear sumthin.’ Her best friend’s here with me, but, mum. ‘m so scared . . that ‘m gonna lose her fer real,” I whimper, swiping my tongue across my trembling lips wet with tears. 

“Oh, Harry,” she sighs, my sadness mirrored in her voice. “I’m so sorry, love. Do they know the extent of her injuries?” 

“I dunno, all they told her friend ‘s that she’s in surgery. We’re waitin’ fer sumbody t’ tell us mo’,” I answer, hiccups stealing my words away from me. “I hate sittin’ here not knowin’, I should go and ask . . but ‘m afraid t’. Mum . . ,” I trail off, weakness overwhelming my body that sags against the wall. I’m not even aware of the people walking past me and the hush of voices, but I couldn’t care less. 

“Breathe, honey, please. Everythin’ will be okay. I know it doesn’t seem that way right now, but it will.”

“Ya can’t say that! Ya dunno if ‘s true,” I exclaim, anger seeping through in my voice, but it’s misdirected. “I jus’ want this all t’ be a dream, I don’t want it t’ be real. I can’t think ‘bout it . . ‘bout her . . dyin’.”

“Shhhh, love. I’m sorry.”

“No, I am. But, God, mum . . I love her. I already know I do. I know it sounds bloody mad seein’ we’ve only been on two dates, but-,” I begin, but she interrupts me, reminding me of where I get my love of it from. 

“No, it doesn’t sound like that, honey. I know how you’ve felt ‘bout her these last few years, she’s been all you could talk ‘bout,” my mother says, and the only relief that I’ve seen is offered in her voice. 

“I love her, mum, and she m-might-,” I try to say, but I can’t spit those words out. I don’t think I ever could, and my desire to avoid them for the rest of eternity trumps all else. 

“Do you think she feels tha same way ‘bout you?” she asks calmly. A huff passes my lips, and I breathe in through my nose slowly. It doesn’t make a difference when a melancholy wave knocks me over. 

“Y-Ya . . I think I know she does now,” I whimper, my voice drowning in the tears. 

“And does she know how you feel ‘bout her, Harry?”

“Ya, reckon she does. I haven’t been able t’ stop lovin’ on her since our first date. And n-now . . I may neva get t’ kiss her ‘gain or hug her or . . ,” the sob leaves more trails of tepid tears on my cheeks. My thumbs press against my eyes, willing the tears to abate, but they don’t obey. Not one part of my body has obeyed my commands since I heard those nightmarish words. 

“Then it sounds like she has somethin’ to fight fer, love. It’s not tha ‘end all be all,’ but tha will to live is a powerful thing, son,” she tells me, the first licks of ice calming my feverish heart. 

“I hope yer right.”

“I’m your mum, I’m always right,” she quips, and the first hint of a laugh graces my lips. It’s gone as fast as it came, stolen away by another round of whimpers shaking from my lips. 

“Everythin’ will be okay, son.”

“And if they aren’t, and . . . she d-doesn’t make it, mum?” I sob, the words finding their exit between sobs that rip from my chest. Pain soars through the tear at the uttering of the words that I have to acknowledge, and wish that I never had to think. 

“Then mumma will be there att’a moment’s notice fer ya,” she replies, and I wish I didn’t hear the crack in her voice. It’s the very one that tore open the slit that the tears poured out through. This all started with the crack of a voice. “Lemme know if you want me to come, Harry.”

“B-But I jus’ got her back, mum. I can’t . . She can’t . . ,” I fail once again, and this time, I’m okay with it. I don’t want to ever have to say that word again, I’ve already uttered them one too many times. 

“You’ll never lose that love ya had, Harry. Trust me, I know ya can’t. I miss Robin every bloody day, but his passin’ didn’t take away our love or tha memories we made . . I know that your love with her only jus’ started, but ya had somethin’ special. I can already see that, darlin’, and you’ll never lose tha memories you made with her, and tha love that ya made together . . Think of those happy times ya had with her while you’re waitin’ for her to be outta surgery. After that, ya should get some rest, love. Sometimes surgeries can take long, and that’s okay, ‘cause you want tha doctors to be thorough and to do all that they can fer her. And they will do all that they can to save her, Harry . . It’s almost six o’clock, love, and even after her surgery is done, it takes a while to come outta anesthesia. It’ll be a long night. Try to get some rest, son, I’m sure she’d want you to,” she explains to me, and suddenly, I wish I could get a hug from my mum. 

The thought propels me into others, wishing I could hide in the arms of another. She’s always been my very favorite hiding place, and another wave rocks through me at the thought of never getting to escape to her arms again. Her smell sends my heart spinning as I drop my phone back into my pocket, aching to have her hair tickle my nose with the scent. Placing my palms against my eyes slick from crying, I hiccup in between tears. Uneven breaths pour in and out of me, and for a second, I can remember the traces of her weight in my arms. The smell of her orange blossom shampoo, the taste of her cherry carmex chapstick, and the strokes of black and gray ink along her wrist. 

“Becks, please be okay,” I mutter underneath my breath. My scalp sings with pain when my fingernails dig into the skin, making me realize this is all real. It’s not a dream that I can wake myself up from, because my life became a dream and then fell away into a nightmare. 

“Harry!” somebody calls my name. I don’t know how much time has passed, standing there in the corner of the hallway pouring my eyes out into my hands. 

It takes a few moments for my eyes to focus ahead of me, and for a fleeting second, her face appears in front of them. Blinking hard, I rub a knuckle against my eye, and she’s gone in a flash. Instead, I find Skye waving me back over to the chairs where a tall man in navy blue scrubs stands in front of her. 

“Coming,” I answer, clearing my throat as my feet remember how to work. The tingles that had settled into my sleeping limbs disperse as I take long, hurried steps until I’m at her side again, trying to forget the words she had said earlier. 

“Is this everybody?” the man says, tanned arms crossed over his chest. 

“No, wait!” another voice pipes up, and I spin around to find Robbie rushing towards us. “I-I’m her brother,” he continues, voice shaky with emotions. His eyes briefly meet mine before he stops at my side, engulfed by a hug of Skye’s. 

“Hey,” I mumble when he pulls away with a nod, his fist brushing along one of his cheeks. The greeting is difficult as my eyes are met with pain and striking similarity. Her very same baby blue eyes sit before me, as well as the wavy dark hair, and a distorted version of her lovely facial features. 

“Hey, Harry,” he returns, his adam’s apple bobbing in his throat after his words. 

When his wet eyes meet mine, more unspoken words pass between us including ‘thank you’s and silent understandings. My squeezing grip is met by his taut arm when I watch the shiny tears fill his eyes. He nods back at me, quivering lips absent of words while another tear breaks free from his Holte Blue Eyes. Those goddamned eyes tear another rip into my heart at the mere sight, drudging up the wishes they conjured within my mind just last night. 

Styles babies with Holte Blue eyes. 

Please, God. Please let that still be a truth. 

“Now that we’re all here, I’m Jack. I’m sorry for the circumstances we’re meeting on, but I’m a nurse on your uh, family member’s team. Rebecca was in a serious accident, and we’re doing all that we can. She went into surgery around ten minutes ago, as soon as she got here,” the towering man explains, achieving the closest thing to quieting my mind. I’m just afraid that when he stops talking, my skull will be vibrating with more thoughts, and far worse ones. “She suffered some fractured ribs that unfortunately pierced her spleen, causing internal bleeding. That is the most urgent of her injuries, but rib fractures are incredibly painful. They can make it hard to breathe deeply or to cough properly, sometimes leading to chest infections. In the accident, she also fractured her ankle, but we’re not entirely sure of the extent of it. Due to the impact of the other car hitting her and the location of it, her right arm was broken and . . Grade 2 concussion . . amnesia,” a cloud passes over my ears then, and I turn away, soon falling into a nearby chair. 

Worst case scenarios bloom within the attic of my body, spewing tears onto my cheeks. Waterfalls cascade down them, fueled by the replaying of the man’s words between my ears. Fractured ribs. Internal bleeding. Chest infections. Amnesia. Broken ankle. Concussion. Broken arm. The tears come harder at the realization of every word, and how they laden my heart with further darkness. It falls into the recesses of my chest with each passing moment, the obscenities that left his mouth acting as the anchor that yank it down, further and further. 

I don’t hear my name the first few times, or register the hand on my shoulder. Swarms of possibilities that I can’t welcome lift me from my seat and down the hall once again until I repeat the past, and ram shoulders with Myles. My eyes fly to his surprised face, but it’s ephemeral before he’s pulling me against his front, and his hand is pressed against the back of my head. 

“She’s gotta be okay,” I plead into his shoulder, finding fistfuls of his blazer in my hands. “B-But internal bleedin’ . . amnesia . . broken bones . . a concussion . . infections. My’, I can’t do this,” the revelation feels prickly on my tongue as I fight to flight. 

“You can do this, Hare. You have to. Becky, she- she needs you to, mate,” he insists, hands waving stripes against my back. I shake my head back and forth into him, refusing to believe any of this. 

“No, this can’t be real. It can’t. I jus’ saw her, I jus’ kissed her and hugged her,” I weep, repetitive begging pouring from my tongue. My hands let go and I push at his chest for escape. He only holds me tighter within his steely arms, and I make out the first of his tears. “I shoulda told her that I loved her, I dunno if she knew. I shoulda told her,” I relent, my body becoming pliant against his. 

“She knew, Harry. I think she knew, mate . . You showed it to her in so many bloody ways, you didn’t have to say it. She knew it, she saw it. You’ll get to tell her, and hear her say it back,” he tells me, but my head hasn’t stopped shaking in denial. “Her friend over there is almost smiling, I think. The nurse is too, it looks like maybe it’s not so meek after all, Hare. It looks like she might be okay.” 

“This ‘sn’t funny, Myles, I swear t’-,” I wail, breaths filling my lungs and refusing to remain. A ‘no’ fills my ears, and I’m forced to turn around when he pulls away at the sound of my name. Yet, he’s not the one saying it. 

“Harry!” Skye calls, and her hurried steps follow her voice. Smearing the tears from my eyes, I gulp and find the bravery to look up. Becky’s best friend in the whole entire world stops in front of me, eyes rimmed with red. “They sound hopeful,” she reveals, the smallest spark of a smile sitting at the edge of her lips. Robbie stops a step behind her, shoving hands into his pockets while a tear falls from the slope of his chin. 

“Really?” I croak, stepping away from Myles until his arms fall from me. She answers with a nod and a rosy smile blooms on her lips before my eyes. 

“Yeah, they said her vitals are becoming more stable which is good. They’re amazed that her injuries weren’t worse, they said that she got lucky,” she explains, and it sounds like music to my ears. The first good thing I’ve heard tonight, albeit this whole affair only taking up the last hour of my life. It’s felt like days on end, not mere minutes. “I’m gonna go and call Chuck to tell him.”

My nod answers her words and Myles leaves with a pat to my back, “I’m gonna go and check on coffees again, maybe food later when you’re feeling like eating,” he announces. My hand finds its way to my curls once again, surely free of snarls now after the number I did on them. 

“It’s good to see you here. Well, not good given the reason why, but you know what I mean.”

Looking up, I find Robbie’s bleary blues pointed at me. I do all that I can, and that’s a nod. 

“You too,” I manage at the last moment, patting his arm awkwardly. His feet wander back over to a line of chairs, and I follow him. Falling into the one left of him, a hushed silence surrounds us. 

“Did she ever tell you that she has ‘feelings’ about things?” Robbie mutters, a sniffle interrupting his question at times. 

“Ya,” I sigh, my bottom lip numb from my teeth pressing into it from all directions. “Good and bad feelings.”

“Yeah . . I got one that I couldn’t shake tonight,” he reveals. His eyes flooded with glassy tears surprise me again, and I almost see her sitting in front of me. A memory from one of our times at the hospital threatens to break loose from the confines of my mind, but I hold it back. “So I rang her, she was just leaving work . . with you. She sounded so happy, and I couldn’t figure out why I’d gotten it. Now, I know . . ,” he finishes, an ironically melancholy laugh bringing his revelation to an end. “Twin intuition, I guess.”

“Ya,” I mutter again, unsure of what else to say. I can’t figure out what to think sitting here in my puddle of tears, let alone something something to fucking say. 

“I hated hearing that bloke say those things, detailing all of the shit that happened to her,” Robbie notes aloud, and I find that I can’t tear my eyes away from my hands when I hear the unmistakable sound of tears letting loose. “But I mean . . it helped, and I think I have a feeling she’ll be alright.”

Conflicting tears run races down the slopes of my cheeks, drenching my eyelashes with liquid sadness. It does little to calm the hammering inside of my chest, but the mannerisms of hers I hear in his voice magnify it just slightly. The brash taste of iron spills across my tongue, and I release my bottom lip from its grasp, but it’s too late because the blood is flowing. My hands blur beneath my eyes, the shocks of baby pink and pastel purple burning in my eyes. The very fingers that she held between her own so delicately just last night, swiping the nail polish brush over their naked canvases. Every other is a different pastel wash of color, and I can still picture the bright yellow and teal that I had painted on hers. 

The warm metallic taste concentrates on my taste buds when my lips press together harshly, few salty tears finding their way into my mouth with my new sob. 

“Yer sista, she- I-,” I stop quickly, not even sure of what I’m saying. I could tell a thousand stories, but I can’t decide which one is right. 

“I know, believe me,” Robbie insists, and at last, I glance over to him. Her dark chocolate locks fall over his forehead, longer than from the first and only time I met him at my firm years ago. The fringe tickles at his eyes, and he pushes it out of his face. “You have something else, you two. I’ve only been telling her to jump your bones for the last two or so years,” he divulges, and a laugh so out of the ordinary adorns my lips. It sputters to a stop, feeling wildly inappropriate, but it comes back to life when a similar one echos from beside me. 

His eyes meet mine briefly, and hold me there looking into her blue eyes as we chuckle together. It doesn’t necessarily feel right, because it feels oh so very wrong. When that thought worms its way into my attic, the sound floats away from the both of us quickly. 

“I heard it all, you know. Your story’s out,” he tells me matter of factly, but the sarcasm can’t find a place in his voice. It falls away, forgotten. “I told her it was about goddamn time you two started dating. She should’ve listened to me sooner, but no, she’s too fucking stubborn.”

“Yer tellin’ me,” I hum, running the pad of my thumb over the glossy nail polish. If I focus hard enough, blocking out the ringing of the phones and Skye’s hushed voice, I can hear her laugh in the recesses of my mind. Laughing about messing up my pink thumb last night, alarm raised in her honey-like voice. “‘m not much betta, ‘m afraid. I didn’t even get t’ ask her on tha first date, she beat me t’ it.”

“I heard . . That sounds like her, always gotta be in control. She had to do everything first when we were little. Talk first, walk first, ride a bike without stabilisers, or graduate bloody uni first,” Robbie remarks, dragging the sole of his Old Skool mustard Vans along the edge of his leftie. “I dunno how she’s gonna fair having her dominant arm in a cast, she’ll throw a fit.” 

“Oh, I know. They betta make it purple,” I comment, and he snickers beside me, the tears still falling although silently. 

“She’ll make them do it all over again if they didn’t do it right the first time. It better look all perfect for Ree.”

His tears drill into my ears, yanking at my heart, but a small relief accompanies them. He’s not using past tense, and although hardly noticeable, it makes this bearable. I’ve spoken to the bloke only once in my life, and she was there beside me then, but I find it easier with every second. Save for the moments I peek at him and see traces of her painted all over him. They aren’t bleeding twins for nothing, I admit quietly, even noticing them wearing the same brand of shoes. A pang attacks my heart when I see him spinning the braided silver ring around his middle finger, and too quickly, I could picture it being hers. 

“D’ya think she’ll . . ,” I begin, but it feels wrong from the start, and I wish it’d never begun. With a shake of my head, I pick off a piece of purple nail polish from my pinkie. The action ricochets around in my chest, and I blink hard at the searing action. No, I can’t, because there’s a chance that she won’t be there to fix it. 

“It sounds rubbish, but our feelings are always right, Ree and I. With our dad, her with you, and me knowing something was going to happen tonight. Now, I think it’ll be okay. Stupid, I know, but I just do. I-I can’t . . . can’t think about her not being okay, she’s my . . . twin sister. I don’t want to think about it,” he confesses in between scattered tears, words growing thick and indistinct. 

“Neitha can I,” I admit, my chest falling at the end when more tears break loose from their gates. “She can’t leave, n-not this early. There’s so much I want with her still. She’s made a damn good lawyer already, and I know she’d make a betta mum and-.”

“She will, there’s nothing she’s not good at,” Robbie concurs with a sad smile adorning his face. I blink, and it’s gone as soon as it had come. “She always got back up after she fell too, on our bikes, ice skating, or even with leaving uni and then going back. Working at your firm too, you could even say. I just- I really want to believe that she’ll get back up from this too.”

“Me too . . mo’ than anythin’,” I agree aloud, shuffling my gray rose ring up and down the length of my finger as I picture the flower that adorns her wrist. “I need Becks t’ be okay.”

+

Phoebe and Joey flit across the screen in front of me, laughs and smiles shared on their faces. My head falls at the realization that those are the furthest things I could feel right now, or do. Licking my chapped lips, another tear graces my tongue. They’re fewer now, however long it’s been that I’ve been sitting in this chair. Asher waits with wandering eyes a few seats over now, and somehow, I’ve only said two words to him. It sends crashing pain through my insides to look at Robbie, her literal twin, but when I look at Asher, avalanches of grief fall inside of me. 

The images in front of me spark memory after bittersweet memory, and they try to whisk me away to a time where I was sitting in a chair like this and she was at my side laughing. Shaking my head, I find it in my hands once again, their three voices murmuring off to the side while devouring subs with Myles. 

Somehow, it’s already late. The sky is pitch black outside, and the stars twinkling somewhere that I can’t find. My eyes droop and yawns leave me occasionally, but sleep couldn’t be further away. If it was knocking at my door, I’d ignore it then too. There were few updates, and each one sounded more hopeful, but I’m afraid to get my hopes up. I’ve done that far too many times concerning her, and nine times out of ten, it left me broken. I hope that I can curb that if maybe I don’t get excited, and yet, saying goodbye to the hope fuels the fire killing me off on the inside. 

I want to turn it off, but I can’t find the remote. I wish I could turn all of this off, but I don’t know how. I can’t let myself fall asleep. No, not until she wakes up, and they just left minutes ago saying she was done in the OR after a successful surgery. I was surprised by how little it had phased me, seeing how Skye jumped to her feet and Robbie was all smiles. Myself though, I couldn’t seem to find one anywhere. I can’t find him. Me. I felt Myles watching me, and worrying. I knew she would be doing the same thing if this was all different, and I couldn’t count how many times I had wished for that truth by now. 

I wished that this could all be different, and alas, here I am too scared to believe it could be. The fear debilitates me with every waking second to believe that things could be okay. I’m so afraid to believe that she’ll be alright, because this all seems so sick and that it changes with every corner I turn. 

The rest of the episode passed before my absent eyes, and then Skye was coming back from seeing her in Recovery. Tears plastered her cheeks now, more than before, and they didn’t shy away from mine either. 

“You should go and see her,” she said, placing a hand on my shoulder. “I’ll be honest, i-it’s awful seeing her like that, b-but . . . it’s her. She’s okay.”

Words flee from my lips, replaced with an adamant shake of my head. I can’t even meet her eyes, because the only ones I can see are Becky’s. Now, I try to push them out of my head as I stare at my feet, the splashes of pink and purple begging for my attention. The color I so deeply crave is only within her eyes, and with a whimper, I try to will the image back to me. I fail, and the tears fall harder down my cheeks, making me wish I could be peppering kisses along hers. 

I’m on my feet before I know what I’m doing, or where I’m going. The instructing words from before repeat between my ears, pulling my feet around a corner and then another. They take me left, and then right. A long hall appears in front of me, and then I’m searching the walls. Numbers climb and climb until I find the very ones I’m looking for. A sob splashes against my palm when it comes to my lips, pressing hard against my mouth. 

208, it reads but that’s not what I see. 

February 8th is what I see staring back at me. The day of our first date, only three days ago. How in the hell has it only been three days since? How in the living fuck has it only been three hours since all of this has happened? 

My feet freeze in their path, and I ignore the nurses and doctors passing me, zig zagging from room to bloody room. Beeping wanders into my ears, and I painfully wonder which one is hers. Which one of those beeps is from her heart? Will it come to an abrupt stop and bring people rushing to her? Can she even hear it? No, she probably can’t, she’s still ‘asleep,’ or so they said. 

I don’t think I’m ready. No, I can’t be. How in the bleeding world could I be ready to see what I’m about to witness? I couldn’t ever be ready for this, and I never wanted to be. I never wanted to be having these thoughts living in my head, more than mere doubts and nightmares planted there randomly. Alas, I know why they’re there, and not for the reason I think first. No. 

I worry.

I fear.

I cry.

I doubt.

I struggle for breath.

I grieve.

I sob.

I ache. 

Because I love. 

No, not loved.

I love. 

All of these emotions and signs of pain course through me, one after the other, because I love that girl lying in that bed just behind those curtains. I love her, and I’ve known it all along. It’s what brought me here, in every way possible. It’s what propels me forward when the nurse at the computer nods, sliding open the gray curtain. It’s what pulls my eyes to the bed, and to the false sounds of breathing. Love is what wrenches the sobs from my chest at the appearance of wires, tubes, and machines hooked up to her. Love is the force that spins me around and makes me shoot down the hall, crumpling to the floor once I reach the corner by the vending machine. Love is what fills my tears that carry images of her lying in that bed fighting for her life. Love fights within myself as my entire body is racked with sobs while I curl into a ball, wishing that seeing wasn’t believing. 

Love is what makes me want to go back to her, and cover her broken body with kisses. Love is what scares the living shit out of me, preventing me from doing that in this very second, because I’m afraid that I’ll break her all the more. Love is what sends the words tumbling off of my aching lips. 

“‘m alright if yer alright, Becks . . . B-But ‘m not alright.”

+

My eyes continue to play tricks on me, but once I blink back the swarm of tears drowning in them, I find that this actually can get worse. Far worse. Their familiar glances shoot over to me and I don’t return them, ignoring the tears staining my skin. They disperse, but he remains there in the center of the waiting room, eyes on me. When I meet those sad blues at last, the newest sob is welcomed by my lips. In a blur, his arms welcome me and I let them. 

“It’s okay,” he croons against my ear, but my head shakes ‘no’s’ again and again into his unfamiliar shoulder. 

“But ‘s not. She’s not okay . . doesn’t even look like her in there. There’s so many wires and tubes and-,” my ragged breaths cut me off in time as his large hands clap against my back. 

“She’ll be okay. She’s a fighter, Harry, always has been. She’s already fighting hard, I see.”

“I wanted so fookin’ badly t’ think that this was all a dream, b-but then I saw her and . . . ‘s not,” I whimper, a new smell surrounding me as I clutch onto the back of his cold windbreaker. 

“Boops has been a fighter ever since she was born, Harry. Did she ever tell you that?” 

“No . . tell me what?” I return, my heart crashing around wildly inside my ribs, about to break free at a moment’s notice. 

“Her and Robbie had to stay in the hospital for a week after they were born,” Chuck narrates, his large palms pressed to my trembling back. “Not Ree, though, she was in and out. It only took her four days to figure everything out - how to breathe properly, eat, and even shit. But Robbie, he took a week. She was smaller too, but somehow she beat all the odds. They say that there’s typically a smaller twin who doesn’t get as much nutrition and the like while in the womb. They don’t have as good of chances thriving outside of the womb, but lookie there. Ree amazed us all, and she’s continued to do so ever since, Harry. I don’t think she’ll disappoint us today either, son,” he finishes, pulling away to cup my face with his palm. The Holte Blues stare back at me, and I catch her features mirrored in his. He nods at me with lips pressed into a flat line, and I see the tears welling in front of the blue as he pats my cheek. 

“Yer daughter, Chuck, I-.”

“I know you do, that’s why you’re here . .That’s why you’re so scared, and I’m rather damn positive she does too,” he returns, ending his words with a wink. 

I love her . . more than there are stars in the sky, and more than there are beats of my heart.

+

I had lost track of how many episodes I had watched of The Office on the telly, but it was wasted, because the images cut in and out in front of my absent eyes. The voices of those around me trickled through when I wasn’t battling with myself. I had long since ignored the gurgling of my stomach, and the buzzing of my phone. The only thing that finally woke me from my drowning senses was when Skye rushed into the room, jittery from the four coffees she'd downed. 

“She passed her vent test to come off it and is breathing on her own!” she exclaims, rather close to jumping for joy. Robbie soon finds himself caught in her embrace, and during my escape, I whiz past them and down the hall. 

“Becks,” I mumble under my breath, scratching at my cheek as the first new tears in the last half hour arrive in my tired eyes. I ignore their trailing voices, and the new sounds I’ve been drowning out. 

I rush past people and their stares, prying and not. Their eyes question me, and I don’t stop, craving the eyes that I’ve been without for far too long. Her blues. But I don’t find them when I delve into that room for the second time in three hours. Yet, I’m met with something miraculous all of the same. 

Most of the wires have disappeared from her body, and the tubes previously hidden in her throat are as well. The first hints of relief wash over me when I take another step, and then another until she’s within reach. It’s not the same and not how I pictured it, but there she is, just a step away. I’m so fucking glad it’s not like one of the ways I had thought of. Her skin is warm underneath my lips, singing praises behind my eyes. The splashes of blues and reds painting her face pull thick streams of tears onto my cheeks as I press kisses to hers. Steady breaths of hers tickle my skin, sprouting the first smile in hours on my lips. 

It’s my Becks. 

It’s her, my girl. 

Prickly stitches smatter her skin in places, but I avoid them as I run my fingers through her hair, brushing it off of her angelic face. A whimper escapes from my lips for a second, silenced by my hand as her face grows hazy from interrupting tears. My tears fall onto her ghost like skin, the remnants of orange blossoms speckled here and there. 

“‘m here, and yer alright. Everythin’s gonna be alright, my Becks,” I murmur against her forehead, peppering kisses to the freckles hidden amongst her skin. “‘m not goin’ anywhere, bug,” I finish, voice catching on the last word when I’m reminded of her saying the very same thing to me earlier today. “And neitha are you. Y-Ya keep yer promises too . . dontcha, Rebecca Ann? . .  An episode o’ FRIENDS came on earlier in tha waitin’ room . . it was our favourite one, ‘Tha One at tha Beach.’ I didn’t wanna watch it without you . . it hurt too much t’, b-but I shoulda known it was a sign that you’d be okay. And now, here ya are, me li’l fighta.” 

“I think . . I think I love you, Becks . . I dunno when I even decided that, seems ‘s been that way fer a while,” I confess into her hair, finalizing my words with another peck to her dark chocolate waves. “Please wake up so I can tell you, li’l one . . ‘ll be waitin’ here ‘til ya do.”

The only response I receive is the steady beating of the monitors sitting at her side. I watch them, sniffling, entranced by the numbers that vary only a few. A calmness washes over me as I lace my fingers with those of her left hand, careful of the wires, while watching the steady numbers. My eyes flit back to her, hidden underneath plain white blankets, and the pain makes a return to me once again. I know it’s all masked under there, the multitudes of stitches, casts, gauze, and brokenness. Injuries that I can’t fathom, no more than when that nurse breathed life into them in the waiting room.

“Ya said yest’day at me house that it was scary t’ admit how ya felt ‘bout me, and bloody hell, ‘s this scary t’ admit t’ you . . Last night I was thinkin’ ‘bout what our kids would look like. ‘m gettin’ ahead o’ meself, I know, only been on two dates so far,” I laugh ever so softly, thumbing at my ticklish nose while the whispers drop from my lips. Circles and curly mazes are left on her hand where my thumb draws them gently, even her name left there in invisible ink. “I hope mo’ than anythin’ they’d have yer gorgeous blue eyes, and prolly some perfect combo o’ our brown hair . . I hope they’d have yer cute li’l dimple, and yer beautiful laugh. Bet they’d be smart like you too, bug, and have yer drive t’ neva give up on sumthin’ . . I dunno if we’d be here if ya hadn’t given up on me . . and I promise you ‘m not ever gonna give up on you, Becks. Never . . ‘ll tell ya ‘bout all tha rest when ya wake up in tha mornin’. Sweet dreams, sleepyhead,” I announce, swallowing against my throat akin to a dessert.

Antiseptic and unfamiliarity greets my nose when I lay one last kiss on her forehead, careful of the nasal cannula across her cheeks. The feet of the metal chair squeal when I pull the chair closer to the bed, her hand limp in mine. Shocks of teal and yellow prick at my eyes, bringing the smallest of smiles to my face with a harsh gulp.

Wiping my nose with the back of my hand, my eyes scan over her obsessively, and lovingly. Underneath the strange blue gown, her chest rises and falls while her fingers remain warm in mine. I settle into the chair, adjusting it until I can lay my arm on the empty patch of bed at her side like a ninety degree angle. There, I lay my head, lulled into a quick sleep by her slow breathing, finally assured that she’s alright.

Only because of that, am I alright too.

+

My dreams had whisked me away, but it wasn’t for nearly long enough. I couldn’t know how long it had been. At the same time, it was too long and yet, not long enough. I didn’t know that I’d be grateful for waking up, and yet at the same time, the bittersweetness would make me yearn for my ignorant dream world once again. 

I’m woken by the feeling of something touching me, and as I slowly come to, I find it’s somebody playing with my hair. As sleep begins to drip off the edges of my subconscious, I can only wonder who that could be, until I suddenly know. My eyes fly open and flit to the face peering down at me. Her’s, and yet, it’s not. 

“Hey, sleepyhead,” she murmurs in a scratchy voice, propelling my body upwards within a second. 

“B-Becks!” I stammer, blinking hard in between rubbing at my eyes quickly, trying to decide if what I’m seeing is real. I find it hard to figure out what I want to be real, glimpsing again the bruises and cuts brandishing her face. 

“Hi,” she whispers, trying to smile, but I see that she doesn’t have it in her. 

“Becks,” I croak, tears tugging at every breath of the word as my arms go around her, and my face dives into her hair. 

“Ouch, careful,” she protests, and profuse apologies fill the air around us. “It’s okay,” she insists, the wires getting caught between us and my body surrounding hers. 

I back up instantly at the sound of her painful words, but it’s the very last thing I want to do. Touching her and wrapping her up in my arms has been the only thing I’ve wanted to do this entire time, ever since I got the call. Reality blanketing me sends thick sobs from me, and into her hair that doesn’t even smell like her anymore. The smell of orange blossom and vanilla is absent, and it continues to make this entire thing worse. It makes it too surreal, more real than I can handle. 

“Shhh, it’s okay,” she hums gently, a crackly sound to her labored voice. Her hands although dainty before, leave ghostlike trails on my back, adding another tally to the surrealness board. 

“D’ya rememba w-who I am?” I ask hurriedly, pulling away to find her exhausted eyes searching for mine. A corner of her chapped lips just barely curls into her cheek, the always present pink color fleeting in the moment. 

“Of course, you’re . . my Harry,” she mumbles with a long, tired blink. The mere five words pull thicker sobs from my lips. I just glimpse the beginnings of tears in her eyes when I return to her arms that beckon for me. 

“‘m so glad yer okay, Becks, so glad. I was bloody terrified ya wouldn’t be,” I confess into the warm crook of her neck, finding a trace of her fruity-vanilla scent tucked away there. 

“Me too, Harry,” she comments a few seconds too late, marked by a clearing of her throat. Although I’m not much better, I hear the evident struggle in her voice like she’s woken up after sleeping, but I know that the raspiness clouding her voice isn’t from that. It’s from the tube that was shoved down her throat to breathe for her, and probably caused the worst sore throat in existence. 

She hardly feels the same, body marked by wires and tubes, a scratchy gown, and an abrasive cast all along her right arm. Prickly threads dot her body in places where the glass left cuts too deep to leave, and the antiseptic smell of a hospital sticks to her all over. I want to hold her against me, to squeeze her all over until I know that she’s real and that this isn’t just a dream. The kiss I press to the top of her head is marred by the smell of iron, and the crusty feeling of blood hidden among her hair. The next one I leave on her forehead is better, and the warmth of her skin under my touch scores a point for reality, although a harsh one. 

“D’ya rememba . . what happened?” I wonder aloud, painfully. My heart, too shocked from the last several hours, doesn’t even budge when the sight of her again astonishes me. Her swollen left eye is surrounded by blue and purple bruises that paint her face in places. 

She nods her head up and down, until her face creases with presumed pain and she stops. My hand covers her entire cheek that I rub with the pad of my thumb, back and forth, back and forth. 

“I don’t know. . I only remember saying goodbye to you, and then . .  talking to the nurse now. I’m glad that’s the last thing . . I remember,” she replies slowly, the words fleeing her lips at times. 

“Y-yer amazin’, y’know that?” I sigh, the tears ever so present, and I’m unsure of when they’ll ever make their departure. A laugh tries to sound from her lips, but not even within a few seconds, her face is overcome with anguish. “Hey, are ya okay?”

“It hurts, but she gave me something.”

“Where’s it hurt, bug?” I question, eyes dancing across her body mostly covered by the thick hospital blankets. 

“Everywhere,” she exhales, sounding short of breath. My lips stray to her forehead once more to leave a peck there, unsure of what more I could do. “Mostly my head . . arm, and tummy.”

“Ya, that’s . . . where they cut ya open t’ fix ya up. And . . ya got a pretty nasty concussion, and a broken arm. It was a good thing ya were wearin’ yer seatbelt, love,” I tell her, struggling to resist covering her in kisses. If only that were the antidote for fixing all of this, for fixing her. I would do it in a heartbeat if it made all of this go away, as if it never happened. 

“Always,” she almost smiles, making my heart flutter. A smile tugs at my lips as I admire her, sure I’ve never seen anything more beautiful in my life, or bittersweet. She adjusts the nasal cannula feeding her additional oxygen, and I just hope it’s enough. I hope that this is all enough, and that so am I. 

Her heavy eyes drift closed, but the second they do, they flutter open again. They wander back to me and a stronger smile pulls at her lips, mimicking the same motion on the strings of my heart. 

“Don’t fight it, baby, get some rest,” I coo, stroking my fingers through her hair to move it away from her face, careful in doing so. 

“I’m okay . . I want to stay with you, Harry,” Becks admits gently, licking her dry lips. A sound of disbelief leaves mine. 

“Always so selfless, you are.”

“I’m sorry,” she yawns, wincing again at another wave of pain, making me step forward. If I try to again, there aren’t any more that I can take, regardless of the wishful thought that I have to slip into bed with her. “I can’t imagine how . . upset and scared you’ve been,” she apologizes, reaching a hand out to find mine, and it causes my heart to seize with a dose of happiness. 

“No, don’t you apologize. None o’ this ‘s yer fault, ‘s tha asshole who hit you whose fault it ‘s. Yer doin’ so good, Becks, ‘m . . . so fookin’ happy ya came back t’ me . . so proud. My Becks,” I say, smiling through the tears washing out my words. I see the smallest hint of the dimple in her left cheek when they round out from the tiniest of smiles. 

“I’ll always . . come back to you, Harry,” she smiles, and I give in, dipping to press my lips to hers. She may smell different, feel different, and even taste different, but the kiss makes me sure that this is my same Becks, and that this isn’t all a dream. Regardless of the fact that I wish it all was just a made-up dream that I could wake up from, I’m okay with the fact that it isn’t, as long as my girl is okay. 

Finally, she’s my girl. 

And finally, she’s okay. 

My Becks.

+

A/N: Hello, lovely people! Okay.... I am SO sorry for that, but thanks for sticking through it.. I promise Becks will be okay, I would never break up Hecky like that. I apologize for no real content warnings, I didn’t know how to do that without ruining the chapter... Also, please cut me some slack if I get any medical things wrong or they’re unrealistic, I’m not a doctor and I’m doing my best with what Google can give me and from personal experience in hospitals. Thanks SO much for reading all this way into the story, I mean it when I say I’m excited for you to see what’s going to happen! Feel free to visit my askbox if you want to talk after this rollercoaster of a chapter, I feel you. I’d LOVE to talk to anybody about Hecky anytime, or if you want a sneak peek of next week’s chapter lemme know! Make sure to check out the Hecky playlist - although it’s long, I think it has some great tunes on there that remind me of our fav couple! I admittedly had it playing the whole time I was making pasta the other day :P Have a great day, ily c:

[neonstarz]

uuuuuhhhh ok here we go! These are for Fried Egg, Samuel, and I’m incredibly curious about Opal so this is also for them! Number wise, 6,9,26, 32, and 50!! Totally not asking about their fashion sense because I feel like they all are incredibly stylish and I want to be like some of them what noooo ahahah

LOOOOL 69 <3 also ur incredibly valid in wanting to look like some of them i try and give my ocs as much drip as humanly possible

FRIED EGG:

6. What were they like at school? Did they enjoy it? Did they finish? What level of higher education did they reach? What subjects did they enjoy? Which did they hate?

Fried Egg was kind of .. absolutely incredibly average in school. She kept her head down and tried to get good grades and not cause trouble. She dropped out when she ran away, though. Albert, the guy who owns the diner, is trying to enroll her in school again though. She liked art class and hated math.

9. Do animals like them? Do they get on well with animals? 

animals in general don't really love fried egg but bacon is the exception 

26. How do they act when they’re happy? Do they sing? Dance? Hum? Or do they hide their emotions? 

copy n pasted from another ask: she goes like >:) a lot. she is not a super expressive person tho and like its kind of hard to tell what mood shes in most of the time. she doesn't actively suppress her emotions, when she ran away she promised herself she wouldn't lie about herself and how she felt, but she just naturally isn't very expressive. 

32. What do they dress like? What sorta shops do they buy clothes from? Do they wear the fashion that they like? What do they wear to sleep? Do they wear makeup? What’s their hair like? 

she wears a lot of band t shirts and black jeans. that is pretty much her entire wardrobe. she has a few things that Albert bought when she first started living in the diner that are like.. stereotypical cishet girl clothing and while fried egg would not be caught dead wearing them she refuses to throw them out because they were a gift and it makes her happy thinking about how little hesitation Albert had before he just started taking care of her. When she has extra money she’ll shop at hot topic but for the most part she thrifts her clothes. She didn't bring a whole lot of money with her when she ran away and Albert’s diner does not make an insane amount so she is not really rolling in dough. She wears a tank top and pajama pants to sleep! She doesn’t wear makeup, it irritates her skin. Her hair is about waist length and neon yellow ! She has bangs that she lets grow out so they cover her eyes for the most part.

50. If they could only take one bag of stuff somewhere with them: what would they pack? What do they consider their essentials?

KJASDFKLS she already did that so im just gonna. tell you what she brought with her when she ran away. The only clothing she brought was a flannel and pair of jeans, and her emotional support black hoodie. She brought about $200 with her, enough for 2 weeks of food and a bit of public transportation. She brought some beef jerky and those tuna cans that come with crackers and plastic spoons and an apple with her too, just enough food to keep her going for the first few days before she could stop and go shopping. she brought her phone with, after factory resetting it. Although if she had to leave and take one bag of stuff with her NOW she would also bring Egg, some food for Egg, and some creamer packets from the diner. 

SAMUEL:

6. What were they like at school? Did they enjoy it? Did they finish? What level of higher education did they reach? What subjects did they enjoy? Which did they hate?

when samuel was at the oakley academy of alchemy he was a very different person. he was very withdrawn and focused on being the perfect kid the perfect student. he didn't love the academy, it was a very conservative school full of other stuffy rich kids trying to be the best. a very competitive environment. he didn’t enjoy any of his language arts classes, but he did like basic/intermediate general alchemy, history of fine arts, and resource collection and identification. samuel dropped out of the university in his 2nd year, when he was 16. 

9. Do animals like them? Do they get on well with animals?

samuel’s SO fuckin good with animals. he has a dog!! an Australian shepherd, named Bo!! animals just naturally trust samuel and like to be around him.

26. How do they act when they’re happy? Do they sing? Dance? Hum? Or do they hide their emotions?

samuel likes to hum and sing under his breath when he's happy!!! 

32. What do they dress like? What sorta shops do they buy clothes from? Do they wear the fashion that they like? What do they wear to sleep? Do they wear makeup? What’s their hair like?

he likes to wear knit sweaters and those super fancy extravagant old timey white button ups, with the flared sleeves and ruffles on the collar and everything. except he wears them in a cool and gay way not in a like. im part of high society way. he also likes to wear dresses sometimes especially for parties with dancing. he likes how skirts flare out. big brand clothing stores don't exist, people get their clothes from tailors, so he just gets his clothing from the local tailor. he does knit his own sweaters though!!

50. If they could only take one bag of stuff somewhere with them: what would they pack? What do they consider their essentials?

what is it with me and characters who run away god. anyway when samuel ran away he brought a fuck ton of gold, enough food to last a week, his bow and arrow, a photo of his parents (that he later threw in a river because fuck those bitches), his hunting knife, a journal, and a few pencils. i think if he had to get up and leave now tho, he just... wouldn't. he's built a life in the tiny town in the far lands, he’s healing, he's found a family and he’s in love, i don't think he could bring himself to leave. 

OPAL:

6. What were they like at school? Did they enjoy it? Did they finish? What level of higher education did they reach? What subjects did they enjoy? Which did they hate?

she was kind of shit in school. she managed to get good enough grades to get into medical school, although she dropped out, but she caused a lot of trouble and tended to get in trouble a lot. she was kind of neutral on school. she liked anatomy classes a lot, especially the ones that involved dissecting cadavers. she didn’t like ela though. 

9. Do animals like them? Do they get on well with animals?

animals do NOT trust her. vibes are RANCID

26. How do they act when they’re happy? Do they sing? Dance? Hum? Or do they hide their emotions?

she has this.. little smirk she does. her expression of emotions is always kind of lowkey though she tries to keep this air of like,,,,, neutrality and kind of stay formal and cool 

32. What do they dress like? What sorta shops do they buy clothes from? Do they wear the fashion that they like? What do they wear to sleep? Do they wear makeup? What’s their hair like?

she dresses SO fucking fancy. her clothes are from like. idk where do rich people shop?? im sexy and poor. she likes what she wears!!! she wears those weird old timey pajamas with the fuckin stripes and embroidered intials to sleep. she wears makeup!! she likes black lipstick and red eyeshadow. her hair’s brown and she has a buzzcut 

50. If they could only take one bag of stuff somewhere with them: what would they pack? What do they consider their essentials?

money <3 she has found that like. really all she needs in life to get what she wants is just insane amounts of money so she would just. bring money.

[samsonet]

In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith.

Sonia was somebody, once. Maybe she'll be somebody now, too.

Title from Elizabeth Barrett Browning's Sonnet 43, "How Do I Love Thee?"

~

Galar has one hero. Everyone knows this.

One hero, wielding the legendary sword and shield, saved the region from the Darkest Day.

One hero, rising above all others, gaining glory with every victory.

Everyone knows this.

*

When Sonia was fifteen, she wandered into the Slumbering Weald.

She was lost. She was tired and cold and hungry. Leon was Champion, Nessa and Raihan were training to be gym leaders, and Sonia was —

Sonia was —

nothing and nobody.

She was lost, that’s all.

*

Gloria twirls her hair the same way Sonia does.

She holds herself the way Sonia does, like she’s not sure if she’s really allowed to be here, to be doing this.

She leans on Hop the way Sonia leaned on Leon, always walking two steps behind.

Sonia worries for them.

She watches the kids’ journey, in person when she can and on the league channels when she can’t.

Of course, the media picks up on how Hop and Gloria reflect Leon and his childhood rival — what was her name again? Professor Magnolia’s granddaughter — oh, yeah, Sonia. They broadcast every parallel, from how long it takes them to reach the gyms to which moves they use in different situations.

One cruel Chattr account sets up a poll about how long it will take Gloria to drop out.

Sonia blocks them.

*

She and Leon used to be close.

They pretty much grow up together, sipping hot cocoa in Gran’s lab and talking about their futures. Leon has high hopes — he’s always had high hopes, especially for a nobody from a town the rest of the region forgot.

She calls him Leo because she wants to give him a nickname and Hop’s the only one allowed to call him Lee. Leon calls her Sunny in return.

They’re kids. They’re happy.

Then one day, Chairman Rose arrives.

Who knows what he saw in Leon? The story goes that Leon had something about his eyes, but if he did, wouldn’t Sonia have noticed it first?

Whatever the case, Leon holds onto the sponsorship letter with both hands. He rushes home to say goodbye to his family, and an hour later he’s at the station, leaving her behind.

Gran hands her a letter, too, because apparently the regional professor can do that. “He’s your friend, isn’t he? Then become the best rival you can be, to help him get stronger.”

Sonia runs after her friend.

It’s the first time she has to catch up to him. It won’t be the last.

They grow stronger together, for a while. But every time they fight, Leon wins.

They battle.

He wins.

They battle.

He wins.

They battle.

Sonia loses.

She loses to him.

She loses him.

Leon becomes the Champion. Sonia goes home. Suddenly they never have enough time to just hang out. They try battling for cups and exhibition matches, but the skill difference is so big that it’s no longer fun for either of them.

Leon remains in Wyndon. Sonia goes home.

She leaves voicemail messages, mostly things like how tall Hop has grown or how the weather is. He leaves his own messages in return.

Everything changes, but at the same time, it feels like nothing did.

*

Gran sends her to research the Darkest Day.

It’s an excuse to get her out of the house, probably. Sonia knows she’s been moping. She did the work to get her master’s degree, but even that doesn’t give her a sense of direction. It’s just something she does, because that’s the path her story takes.

Galar has one story. Galar has one hero.

When the people cheer, they’re yelling Leon’s name.

*

Opal says, “You had more correct answers than Leon did.”

It’s the first time since the beginning of the challenge that Sonia has actually done something better than Leon. She looks up at the gym leader, eyes wide.

“You obviously have talent,” Opal observes, “but you give up too easily. I suppose it must be hard being Professor Magnolia’s granddaughter, yes?”

“Haha… I guess…”

Opal laughs. “I wish you luck, child. Though with your skill, you might not need it.”

*

It’s pure luck that she’s there when the mural falls and reveals two statues.

Two statues.

The theory forms in her head like an arrow reaching a target. One hero — two youths — history is written by the survivors — a sword and a shield — one hero — the Darkest Day — history can be covered up — one hero — who knew about this? — who changed it? — why?

Galar has one hero.

Everyone knows this.

Right?

Maybe not.

*

She meets Nessa at the opening ceremony, but it’s at Hulbury when they actually become friends.

“I know water-types like the back of my hand!” she boasts, spreading her arms wide. “This is my city, and I’m gonna shine in the gym battle!”

“Oh yeah? Well, I’m gonna win, too! My team is strong!” From Sonia’s arms, Yamper barks. He knows what he’s here for.

But Nessa laughs, trying to hide it behind her hand.

“What’s so funny?”

“If I can give you a word of advice? The gym leader’s got a Palpitoad. You need to figure out a way to beat ‘im without Yamper.”

Sonia bites her lip, considering.

She spends the rest of the day on the route back to Turffield, catching an Eldegoss.

When Sonia leaves the Stadium victorious, she finds Nessa and thanks her. “It was nice of you to tell me that. You could’ve just let me walk in there and lose.”

“I like you,” Nessa says, sticking out her hand. “If you wanna repay me, think about this: be my rival all the way to Wyndon!”

Leon is already my rival.

But Sonia has two hands.

She reaches out and shakes Nessa’s.

“I accept, rival!”

*

It doesn’t have to be like this, Sonia muses, back at the lab. She pictures the region as the outline of a hand, holding onto its story, holding onto its champion. When it can be like this. Galar has two heroes.

She snorts.

Her grandmother asks, “What’s so funny?”

Sonia finds she doesn’t quite have the words.

*

Sonia writes.

She writes everything. She writes like it’s all she knows how to do. She pours her heart on the page and backs it up with sixty pages of citations.

Her gran’s publisher picks up the book. Part of it is her name, probably, but Gran reminds her that academic presses are strict. If the research wasn’t credible, they wouldn’t have accepted it no matter whose name was on the cover.

Sonia takes some pride in that.

*

When Sonia was fifteen, she wandered into the Slumbering Weald.

She was lost, but somehow she felt called farther up and further in. Farther up and further in. Farther up — and then she finds it.

It’s a crumbling ruin. That in itself isn’t strange; Galar is full of ruins, after all.

But this spot…

There’s power here. She can feel it.

The fog surrounds her.

She reaches out.

The fog whispers, you are not the hero of this story.

*

“Hop and Gloria know what they’re doing with their lives,” Gran says. “You should be more like them.”

Gran, Sonia wants to say, They’re twelve. When I was twelve, I knew what I was doing with my life, too.

What she says is, “I’ve got time, don’t I? I’ll figure something out.”

*

Once, during a very sad off-season, Sonia and Raihan go on a date.

They spend the entire time talking about Leon.

She’s not sure what she expected.

*

When Sonia is seventeen, Nessa visits. She’s come out all the way to Wedgehurst, so it must be big news.

Sure enough, she doesn’t disappoint. Nessa grins, bright and beaming, and says, “It’s official! I’m a gym leader, Sunny!”

Oh. “That’s -- that’s amazing! I’m so happy for you!”

Nessa’s quiet for a moment. Sonia guesses what she’s thinking: You don’t have to pretend to be happy for me. It’s okay if you’re mad or sad or something that I’m moving forward and you aren’t.

But Nessa grins and says, “Why don’t I take you out for dinner? Come on, my treat!”

Maybe Sonia doesn’t know what her friends think, after all.

(They have a good time, regardless.)

*

When Sonia is twenty-one, she wanders into the Slumbering Weald again.

Ah, but she’s not wandering now, is she? She’s guiding a hero.

At the stone monument, Hop is waiting for his rival. One hero of Galar runs to meet the other. He welcomes her with open arms.

They have one final battle, not as gym challengers, not as Sonia and Leon part two. This time, they’re friends and rivals. This time, they’re legends.

Gloria and Zacian strike.

Hop and Zamazenta defend.

And in the end…

“I want to become a Pokémon Professor,” Hop declares. Gloria nods enthusiastically, then hugs him. There’s no gap between them, now; they’re complementing parts, each with their own purpose.

When Leon appears, it’s all Sonia can do to keep from hugging him, too.

*

When Sonia is eleven, she enters Hulbury and is ambushed by a group of reporters.

“Sonia! As Leon’s rival, do you have any tips on how to defeat him?”

“Sonia! Are the rumors true that your grandmother is developing a new form of Dynamaxing?”

“Can you give a comment about why you retired from battling professionally?”

She hates this. She wants to scream.

Then the boy king himself appears. “What’re you all doing?”

Sonia gives him a helpless shrug. Go away, Leo! Let me die of embarrassment in peace!

But Leon doesn’t go away. Instead, he pushes into the crowd and stands between her and the others.

“You wanna bother her? Why don’t you battle me first!”

The reporters pause.

Leon doesn’t show any signs of joking.

The reporters back off.

Later, when they’ve lost the press and hidden on some rocks by the lighthouse, she asks, “Why’d you bother stepping in, Leo?”

Why waste your time with me? Don’t you have a new, stronger rival now?

“I dunno.” He kicks the air. “I guess… Since you don’t battle anymore… I feel like I gotta keep an eye out for you. I wanna help you.”

She gives a smile that she doesn’t feel. “You can’t always help people by winning battles, you know.”

Leon looks away.

*

One day, over a cup of tea, Hop says, “Y’know, I’ve been thinking.”

It’s his serious tone. Sonia sets aside her paperwork and gives him her full attention. “What is it?”

“If I’d been the one to become the champion,” Hop says, “I think I would’ve been miserable.”

“...oh?”

“I know it sounds weird, ‘cause that was my dream and all, but… if I became champion, everyone would still be thinking of me as Leon’s little brother. I’d still be trying to be like him… cool, strong, unbeatable… and I’d never figure out what I wanted for myself.”

That’s true: the media had enough of a field day with Hop as a challenger; as a champion, he would get it worse.

(In contrast, Gloria was cast as everygirl rival and not Leon 2.0. Sonia wonders if that allowed her to keep a clear mind during everything.)

Sonia smiles. “Right. Be careful what you wish for, because you might get it. And the reverse: be thankful that you don’t always get what you want.”

Hop brightens. “Yeah. Now I’m doing what I want to do, and it’s really nice.”

*

When Sonia is fifteen, she wanders into the Slumbering Weald.

She’s lost, but she walks forward by intuition if not sight.

She can feel the power here. This is a place where legends begin. This is a place where heroes are made.

She wants it. She wants, she wants, she wants.

The fog surrounds her.

She stands as tall as she can, the nobody from nowhere, the forgotten rival. Is she worthy?

The fog whispers, You are not the hero of this story.

“I can be! Let me, let me, please —!”

The fog whispers, You are destined to wait here while others pass on before you.

She screams. She cries. She strikes with her bare fists — but of course, whatever she’s aiming for is out of reach.

The fog whispers, Be strong, child. Your time has not yet come.

[stardustwink]

I wanted to talk about swsh bc I’m almost done with post game and I needed to write down my thoughts somewhere so. Here we are. Story spoilers ahead btw. Also a lot of gushing abt the rivals bc they’re my children now

I have. So many feelings about this game. tbh the story could have been so much better (and there was potential for something great. But I think it’s mostly bc I disliked how they built Rose’s character as the main villain, more about that later) but the characters... they’re really good.

First bc they gave us Hop and his insecurities as the rival that always loses even though it’s his dream to be champion too - something I’ve always wanted to see in a rival ever since Blue left me hanging (though I understand, as he was the very first rival and we couldn’t have a full plot heavy pkmn game back then), and that I felt was touched upon in Cheren but not really worked with? Anyway. I’m glad they took the time to add his insecurities and his need to keep up w/ Leon to his character and how he grows past it later, it made me actually feel bad for having to take his dream away from him at the end (though!!!! I’m really glad he’s training to be a professor now, bc it really does fit him better! Making his own path and all that) A very good character imo, definitely going into my fav list. The fact that he takes his Wooloo off the team when he’s conflicted abt his fighting style and puts him back in after making up his mind still makes me a bit emotional if I’m going to be honest :’’)

And then there’s Bede. God he’s!!!!! Such a good character!!!!!! How I missed having a rude rival like that! I loved the way his story was handled (though I did wish he’d appear a bit more...but that’s just bc I like him way too much;;), from starting out as a stuck up jerk to getting tricked and then finding a place to belong after Opal took him in. I have so many thoughts abt him. About how he speaks so politely even though he’s a stuck up brat, about how he wears a watch that is way too big for him bc it was a present from Rose (and how much it fits his character as someone trying desperately to fit into a role he’s been given by a man who didn’t even care to get his wrist size right), how after he turns into the fairy gym leader the watch is nowhere to be seen bc, as Opal says, he doesn’t have to follow anyone’s whims anymore and- at the very end! How he hijacks the competition to battle you bc his disqualification was unfair and he deserved to stand there! The way he looks so much happier and smiles as he accepts defeat! I love this kid so much. also bc his entire color scheme and pkmn choices are my complete aesthetic, the fairy fam is literally A+ (also god will we ever know what happened to his parents??? What’s “ran into some trouble”?? Did they die, or did they abandon him bc of money issues??? @/gamefreak I NEED ANSWERS)

Marnie was adorable too, her slight accent is a very charming addition to her character and the slight foreshadowing of her ties to the last gym were great! Also she’s so cute. I wanna become a team Yell member after seeing her smile. She’s a dark type specialist man!!!!! That’s so cool!!! Why are the rivals so cool!!!! And her relationship with Piers is so cute too, they’re great siblings. I loved that when Piers asked her to become the next gym leader she was like “thanks brother, but I refuse. Im gonna be champion! :)” . Her cheering made the end fights so much better. I just wish we had some more interactions between the three rivals bc hop and bede’s fight was great but I wish marnie interacted more with them ):

Sonia and Leon were also very good. Watching Sonia find herself in her research and become a proper professor during my travels was SO SATISFYING YALL HAVE NO IDEA. Her interactions with Leon were so great too, and I’m very happy that she’s good friends with Nessa! Leon is a dork and I also love him, and I kinda enjoy that they both took the role of investigators and let the kids continue w/ the gym challenge by themselves (finally some responsible adults not leaving all the problems for 10-13 yr olds to solve am I right!). Also, LEON PLEASE TELL YOUR BROTHER YOURE PROUD OF HIM HE REALLY NEEDS TO HEAR IT!!!!

but I’ve praised swsh long enough so let’s talk about Rose. I felt like he was an attempt by nintendo at first to try and portray a corrupt businessman but they ended up not following through w/ it and the end result was....that. Don’t get me wrong; there are some points abt him that I enjoy, like the terrible fact that he basically ‘adopted’ a kid to use for his own benefit and couldn’t even remember his name properly, and that he wears dorky clothes off work. But they tried making his motives sympathetic and they didn’t make any sense??? What’s up with “being worried about the future of Galar” when he LITERALLY ALMOST CAUSED THE APOCALYPSE?? Being worried about not having enough energy for the country to survive after like 10000 years ain’t a good motivation for putting everyone in danger, chief.

 And here’s what they could have done: show just how corrupted by his own mentality and power Rose was; show him charismatic on the outside but completely apathetic to the people and justifying his actions by wanting Eternatus’ energy to keep modernizing Galar at the expense of some casualties bc hey! As long as the country will live on and keep progressing, what’s the problem with some lives being lost along the way if its for the greater good? Show him as the evil rich businessman he was meant to be! One that can’t understand that giving a pokemon and a golden watch to an orphan and “saving” him doesn’t give Rose the right to use him and discard him like a tool, one that tries to manipulate the Champion to do what he wants bc he’s given him the fights he wants and promised his family would be safe; just give me a character I can properly hate without feeling disappointed! You’ve done it with Ghetsis and Lusamine, you can do it with Rose too! Commit to your evil rich apathetic businessman plans, nintendo!

I felt both Oleana and the weird hair twins were better antagonists in this front. I even thought like SHE was the true villain and was using Rose’s apparent naïveté as a well intentioned but stupid rich guy and her position as his secretary to get what she wanted at the beginning; alas, that’s not what happened unfortunately ): but she had a proper motivation and enough foreshadowing for me to suspect her and still think she’s cool (her backstory is great for example. I was so surprised when she used a Garbodoor after all those cool lady pokemon!) the twins are both stupid looking and Swordward and Shieldbert are TERRIBLE names, but I feel like they’d be more iconic as main villains too.

I think that’s all for now, ive written way too much already djdflgjf if anyone managed to read all of this then thanks for reading my rambles 

[bluestarruby77]

Opal and Malachite

Name: Opal Bellmorhe Gender: Female Age: 4 Weight:  Height: Eyes: Opal White Illness: minor Osteogenesis imperfecta (OI) Name: Malachite  Age: 4 Gender: Male Weight:  Height:  Eyes: Malachite Green Name Garnet  Age: 5 Gender: Female Weight: Height: Eyes: Left: Garnet Purple, Right: Sapphire Blue Illness: Defective Right eye so her mother donated hers. 

After years of being pushed around in a wheel chair, drinking a shit ton of Orange juice and milk, eating yogurt, and going through non stop therapy sessions. She begged to be able to go out and play with the other kids that always came to their house. This is the first time Malachite and opal meet.

Opal ,while carrying her favorite toy bow, and Malachite are playing tag together. Opal gets distracted by a butter fly. This pissed off Malachite and he tosses a rock at her. "Hey stupid! You were playing with me! Opal, "ow!" she starts to cry Garnet get out of the swing and starts to walk towards them. "Hay! Play nice!" Malachite "Oh ya?! Make me!" He snarls Opal tightly grips her bow and walks over to Malachite at the same time as garnet but reaches him first. Her face down hidden by a shadow a tear falls. Malachite "what do you wa..." He is quickly cut off as opal pulls back her bow and starts beating Malachite. Then crack! Opals arm breaks. Garnet pauses in shock. That is what starts malachite' and opals relationship. Just the respect he had for her after that fight.. Lapis and pearl see this and rush out into the yard and separate the kids. They both bow to each-other while tightly holding on to their own child "IM SO SORRY!" Garnet goes to her parents "I was gonna stop them but..* Ruby stops her as he pats her head. Jasper and Amethyst are laughing at the stupidity of the situation and how Malachite got his ass beat by a girl much smaller than himself.  The kids are separated. Soon pearl and Amethyst realizes the issue. Amethyst rushes her to the hospital still so happy to see her hold up her own against some kid larger than her. Lapis and pearl set Malachite down and explain to him what has happened and why he needs to be more careful around opal. Lapis takes Malachite home. The next day, it's time for school for both Malachite and Lapis. Malachite asks, "hey mom? Can I stay home today?" Lapis, "what! Why" "Because I wanna see if opal is okay." He replies. Lapis sighs, "we don't have time for this. You can see her when you get home AFTER school." Malachite yell "BUT MOM?!" Lapis snaps back, "I SAID NO! NOW COME ON" Lapis drives Malachite down to the bus stop, "now please be good. And have a good day... I love you." Malachite says as he is leaving the car, "I love you to." Lapis rushes off to try and make it in time for her own classes. As soon as her car is out of sight, Malachite runs back towards home. He runs up to their apartment and tosses his back pack on to the floor. Then goes to his room and smashes open his piggy bank. He scrapes up the money and leaves again. He walks through town to a flower shop, buys a dozen tiger lollies and then heads to pearls house. As soon as he reaches their door he beats it trying to get someone to answer. Amethyst opens the door with a yawn. "Oh hey kid, aren't you suppose to be in school?" "Yes sir" he replies, "but I wanted to bring opal a gift to say I'm sorry for what happened." Showing the flowers. Amethyst takes them and says, "why thank you but she is fine, it's only a broken arm. We were quite lucky this time" he smiles rubbing the back of his head. "But now you should be getting to school. Do you want me to drive you?" Malachite replies, "No, I was hoping to see her as well. SIR!" "Whats with the formality?" Amethyst asks. "My mom said it helps to be nice and use formal words to get the things you want sir." Malachite says nervously. "Is that so," Amethyst ponders, "Well I guess it wouldn't hurt if you stayed. She is up in her room first door to the right." Malachite quickly hugs Amethyst then bows to him. Soon rushing up the stairs into the bedroom. Opal is asleep, so he pulls up a chair next to her. Amethyst later walks in with a vase with the tiger lilies and clear water in it. He sets it by opals window. Then leaves. Time goes by as Malachite awaits for her to wake up contemplating what he will even say to her. Soon its noon, Amethyst walks in with 2 plates of food and sets them next to Malachite on the desk behind him. Malachite, "Is it lunch time already?" Amethyst replies "yep" as he gently nudges opal. "Honey, it's time to wake up." Malachite freaks out and silently yells "NO IM NOT READY, I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT I’M GOING TO SAY TO HER!" Opal sits up and yawns, "good morning papa" she rubs her eyes then looks to Malachite, "Oh?! Hey! You were that boy from yesterday." She smiles Malachite blushes and turns away. "I didn't come here for you, I only came because I felt bad." Amethyst snickers, "Yes, he felt so bad, the poor boy even got you flowers." This makes Malachite blush even more as opals eyes light up. "They are beautiful!" Says Opal. Amethyst: "now eat up you two." Then leaves. Opal: "THANK YOU PAPA! " They grad their respective plates and eat in silence. After Malachite finishes he says, "Well I guess you are okay, I guess I'll head home now." "You don't want to stay?" Opal sadly replies. "You want me to?" He says facing away from her in a snarling tone "Well it dose get really lonely here sitting in my room all the time." Opal pleads. "Just promise you'll come see me again tomorrow okay?" Malachite turns to her face fully flushed "FINE" then storms out. Ever since that day, Malachite went to her house every chance he got.

[spiteweaver]

previous | next

“You’re still too stiff!”

The pale magic at Emir’s fingertips sparked and died, and Seaglass relaxed his stance. Beside him, Light made a quiet sound of frustration on behalf of his young companion, but wisely said nothing. It seemed he was learning when to hold his tongue; it had only taken him a hundred cycles, or so Emir would have teased if he hadn’t currently been kicking a hole in the sand. The inside of his cheek must have been bitten raw. They’d been out since dawn, and the day was creeping toward twilight now. He’d had plenty of time to make a dent.

Not nearly enough time to figure out how to control himself, though, and therein lay the problem. To Emir, there was never enough time, and that was how he’d convinced Seaglass out of bed at six o’clock that morning. His mentor just couldn’t say no to someone with that kind of gumption.

“I’m exhausted, Emir,” Seaglass groaned, and flopped down in the shallows, letting the chilly water soak him right through. “You can’t rush perfection, so let’s call it a night. We can get dinner; me ‘n Atsushi were already gonna go when he got back from Aphaster, and I’m sure he won’t mind you tagging along.”

“I’m quite happy as I am,” Light mused, “but I have always wondered what it’s like to eat.”

“We could mash something between your pages--”

“Absolutely not!”

“I don’t get it.” Emir sat across from Seaglass, a few yards up the shore, and drew his knees to his chest in pensive thought. “I know how to use my magic,” he said. “I used it all the time on the road with Nero. Even after I absorbed Eloi, I--I still knew how to use it, and I only lost control that one time. I just don’t get it.”

“Any idiot can use magic,” Seaglass replied. “Using it’s not the same as mastering it. You’re too focused on the using; you aren’t focused enough on the feeling. When you lost control, it was because you were emotional, right?”

“I was afraid,” Emir admitted sheepishly. “We were up against something terrible. I was--I was angry at it, and scared for the people it had hurt. I wanted to do something, anything to help them, but--” He took in a slow, shuddering breath, muffled by his mask. “I couldn’t, in the end. I only made things worse.”

“...You want to know what helped me?”

“Nearly drowning the village?”

“Er, well, yeah, in a sense.” Seaglass tilted his head back. Stars were beginning to wink into existence as the sky grew darker. On a sentimental whim, his fingers found the jar of ash around his neck. “I remembered the people I loved,” he said, “and it made me realize that no matter how angry, or sad, or scared I am, they’re always going to need me, and I’m always going to love them. I have something worth fighting for, worth becoming better for. You need to find that, and hold tight to it. It’s what’ll ground you.”

Emir dug his toes into the sand. The water was cold, but the sand was still warm from the afternoon sun. He liked that. He liked how the sand trapped the warmth of daylight, even during winter, and how the cool, temperate waters clashed with it against his skin. He liked how the sky changed colors slowly, how many stars he could see against the rich, deep purple of early evening, even from behind his mask. He liked this place. He liked Seaglass. He liked Light, and Kana, and Yuna, and…

...and Nero.

“I think about them all the time,” he said. “I never stop thinking about them.”

“When you feel like the world is falling down on your head,” Seaglass went on, “do that. Think of them, think of everything you love the absolute most about them. I came back because Dreamweaver needed me, because I needed to protect them and this village. You have to have a reason to come back. Once you have that, you’ll be one step closer to mastering yourself. Make them your reason. Temper your emotions for their sakes, not just yours.”

Emir glanced up. Seaglass was smiling at him; he always did when he thought Emir was being too hard on himself. He was a good mentor, and Emir thought…

Emir thought he would have liked Nero, and that Nero would have liked him. Nero--always determined, always driven, never stopping, no matter the odds. He overcame every obstacle, and he did it unflinchingly. It wasn’t just about his daughter. It was about everything and everyone, all of the lives the Shade had ruined, all of the evil it stood for. So he fought, and he fought, and he fought, until the battle was done. He simply refused to give up. So did Seaglass. So had Jìng.

So would he.

“One more,” Emir said, and forced himself onto his feet. “One more time, then we’ll call it a night.”

Seaglass shrugged and stood, taking his stance again. A shield of seawater rose with him, and Emir saw his own mask reflected in it, dancing among shards of moonlight. Eloi had given it to him, when he had gone to her and taken her power; it was the only token he had of her, his dear, cursed sister. He hated it. He loved it. He loved her, even now.

“What are you feeling?” Seaglass asked.

“I miss my sister…”

“Use that.”

He had taken this power from Eloi with the promise that it would be used for good. If he could not master it, he could not keep that promise. He would fail his sister, who had given her life, miserable though it may have been, for the benefit of their world. Her smile, her laughter, her voice; she may have been gone, but if he could only master himself, then maybe she could live on through his good deeds. Maybe her sacrifice would not have been in vain, and maybe he could win this time, and maybe…

Maybe he could see them all again.

He could picture them so clearly, standing there on the shore, their backs to him and their faces turned skyward. It was beautiful here. It was so beautiful that it hurt, to imagine so many beautiful things in one place. When he found them, he would bring them here. He would show them how beautiful it was.

But first he had to become better.

“--op! Stop, Emir, stop!”

The darkness inside his mask came into sharp focus, and everything beyond it blurred like smudged paint. He could feel his breath on his own face; it was hot and labored. There was a rushing in his ears like distant thunder and a taste on his tongue like lightning--no, like salt water. It seemed to be pouring into his mouth, and when he tried to call out, more of it rushed in to silence him. He reached for Seaglass, but his limbs were heavy, and there was something, something glowing…

The bubble of seawater around him burst, and he fell, coughing, to his knees. Seaglass grabbed him and hauled him up. “Wha...what happened…?”

“You did it,” Seaglass said breathlessly, “for a minute anyway.”

“I did it…? I controlled...?”

“Is he well? If you’ve done something to him, sea witch, I’ll--”

“Light,” Emir wheezed, “I did it. I did it.”

“Sorry, Light,” Seaglass said, “but I had to contain him somehow. He was sparking all over the place, you saw ‘im. Cor, you’re a little early for the Valentine’s Day fireworks, Emir.”

“Where are we...going…?”

“Crucis.”

“Why…?”

“You might wanna have a look at your hands.”

Emir’s mind was hazy, his head throbbing, but he did as he was told. There was something there, the same glowing something he had seen in the bubble. When he looked at it, he felt somehow invigorated. All of that light, and the soothing hum of magic--he had never seen anything like it.

No. No, he had.

“Is this…?”

“By the Eleven,” said Light, “it’s Opal!”

[markonasurface]

pynch, continuation of the last prompt with a happy ending, because im suffering. (also adam's roommate and that other guy getting yelled at)

Sorry, there’s no yelling but I think the ending is happy enough:)

Adam spent the rest of the weekend miserable in bed and hating himself. Only one part of it was new to him. He couldn’t shake the feeling that he ought to be working or doing homework.

Or writing a really, really, catastrophically long apology to his boyfriend … if they were still together.

He considered calling or texting but he knew it would just make Ronan angrier. His phone buzzed then and he hurriedly grabbed it off his nightstand and stared at the screen.

Adam’s heart was racing. He didn’t know whether to be excited or terrified.

When he realized it was just Gansey, his heart dropped.

He used the many buttons on the flip phone to scroll through the message.

I don’t know what’s going on but Ronan answered his phone. He sounded miserable. Is he okay?

Adam groaned and was promptly shushed by the girl in his roommate’s bed.

He stared at the message then carefully typed out his reply. He felt ashamed. Davy had stopped by after Ronan left and filled him in on what happened at the club.

Gansey wouldn’t judge him and he gave Adam the best advice so he took a deep breath and pressed send.

His phone started buzzing thirty seconds later and he skimmed through messages from Gansey, Blue, and Henry.

What the hell???!!!

Adam Parrish.

Wtf bro. Not cool.

“Ugh.” Adam threw his phone to the foot of his bed but it tumbled off and clattered against a used glass.

The girl in his roommate’s bed sat up, not bothering to cover her naked torso, and glared. “I’m trying to sleep.”

Adam glared back and got out of bed, his body protesting. He snatched up his phone, fresh clothes, and his wallet and left the room, slamming the door behind him.

He ran into Davy on his way to the shower.

“Adam, hey.” Davy scratched the back of his head. “How’s it going?”

“Just great,” he muttered, walking past him.

“I’m sorry!” he called after him.

Adam kept walking. “Yeah, I know.”

After his shower, he got in his crappy car and started driving, hoping it would make it all the way to Ronan’s place. His phone rang and he looked at the screen.

3 missed calls

He flipped his phone open and said, “Hello?”

“Adam!” Gansey said, sounding a bit relieved.

“I told you so you’d give me advice, not so Blue and Henry would freak out at me,” Adam said, wedging the phone between his ear and shoulder so he could keep one hand on the wheel and wipe his runny nose with the other.

“Blue was holding my phone when you texted,” he explained. “Still want my advice?”

He grunted and waited.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” Gansey commented. “Just apologize.”

“Gee, hadn’t thought of that,” Adam snapped.

Gansey ignored his tone and said, “Ronan loves you. That’s why he’s so upset. You hurt his feelings but nothing’s gonna make him fall out of love with you.”

“We’ll see,” Adam said. “I’m halfway there.”

“Do you want me to stay on the line til you get there?”

“No,” Adam gulped. “Gansey, I really hurt him. I don’t know if it makes it worse that I don’t even remember the night.”

Gansey hmm’d in the very Gansey way he had of contemplating.

“Thanks, Ganse,” Adam said and hung up.

“Adam!”

Ronan visibly flinched and turned to look at him. Adam’s heart was racing. Perhaps it was a good thing Ronan was working his land. It would motivate Adam to make an even better apology.

“Hey, Opal,” Adam said. He accepted her hug and looked up. He felt sick.

Ronan was approaching, slowly, like a predator and the sun shining behind him made him looking seraphic and powerful.

“Oh, yeah?” Adam responded absently to Opal excitedly telling him how “Kerah” planted her some magical plant or other.

“Opal, go inside.” Ronan crossed his arms over his chest.

“But Adam’s here!” She pouted.

“I said go inside, Brat,” Ronan repeated himself but kept his eyes on Adam.

She stomped her hooves every step of the way. They both watched her go inside and slam the door.

Then they looked at each other until finally Adam spoke. “Hey.”

Ronan had kept his features pretty neutral but at Adam’s one word attempt at a conversation, he sneered. “You come by just to say hey?”

Adam squeezed his hands into fists in his pockets. He felt a flare of irritation but reminded himself he was lucky Ronan didn’t immediately send him away.

“No, I came to say I’m sorry.”

“Great.”

“Ronan, come on,” Adam sighed.

“What do you want me to say?” Ronan asked tiredly. “I came up to surprise you and found you with another guy.”

Adam felt himself blush underneath his already flushed cheeks. “It’s not like that.”

“Really? Then what’s it like?”

“I’m not here to make excuses,” Adam said, looking away from Ronan. The sun was too hot on his face and it was hard to form a coherent thought, but he needed to tell Ronan how sorry he was. “I can’t remember anything, okay? I didn’t want to go out in the first place and I’m just sorry. I should’ve refused more and I shouldn’t have drank so much.

“Ronan, please. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me and I wish I hadn’t fucked it up because I don’t know what I’ll do without you,” Adam’s voice cracked and he felt tears in his eyes. “I love you, Ronan. I’ve never loved anyone until you. I didn’t even know what it was and I didn’t know that anyone could ever feel that way about me. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry and I-I-I just - I love you.”

His voice was almost completely gone along with his strength. If Ronan didn’t forgive him, Adam didn’t think he could even make it to his car.

He waited but Ronan’s face was shadowed and he could stare any longer. Then Ronan walked past him and Adam’s heart crumpled. He squeezed his eyes shut at last.

The thing was, he couldn’t blame him.

“You coming or what?”

Adam turned around and Ronan was staring at him. He held out a hand.

“I dreamt you some cold medicine. Come on.”

Not too long later, Ronan sat on the edge of the bed and pushed Adam’s damp hair off his forehead.

“I’m still upset,” he said callously.

Adam tried to nod. “I understand.���

“But Davy called.” Adam was confused but he didn’t have the energy to say anything. Ronan continued, “He said it wasn’t your fault. I know it wasn’t. I could tell that night but it fucking sucked and I was mad.”

“You answered your phone?”

“Keep up, Parrish,” Ronan said.

“What’d you tell him?”

Ronan shrugged. “That if I ever saw him or that douchebag ever again, I’d kick both their asses.”

Adam laughed until it turned into a cough. “That’s the Ronan I know and love.”

[jasminerobotnik]

Fraudulent Gain Chapter 2

                            Chapter 2

Walking deeper into the forest Jasmine began to get suspicious of Eggman’s intentions. Why was he taking her into the woods in the first place? Jasmine knew he wouldn't harm her in any way, she knew she had nothing to worry about.  Jasmine felt she had held her tongue long enough; She had to say something.

“ Ivo, where are you taking us? We have been walking for a while”

Eggman stops and he gazes at Jasmine.

“ I apologize for being so mysterious Jazzy. I guess I just want to save it all for when I show you the this ancient text.”

Jasmine’s mind explodes with ideas of what this ancient text is. Could it be a riddle that opens a door to a powerful relic.maybe a powerful ancient curse. With all of the possibilities Jasmine was getting really excited. Its like she is playing  a Zelda game  in real life

“ What does it say?” Jasmine says in an excited tone with her eyes as big as silver dollars.

Eggman laughs and wraps his arm around her tiny waist.

   “ I guess I will go ahead and tell you. From what I can understand all I need are the seven Chaos emeralds to acquire all the power of creation and destruction!”

Eggman gets all excited about telling Jasmine the news. He hugs her to death while lifting her off the ground. Jasmine is gasping for air as she struggles to speak.

“ Thats wonderful, glad to hear it, please let me breathe.”

Eggman finally lets her down and coughs a bit.

“ Sorry I got to excited” Eggman chuckles

Jasmine was so happy to see him this excited.  Then she wondered

Just the seven Chaos Emeralds to acquire such power? Seems like an easy ticket. he is hiding something else?

Jasmine knew he had to be keeping something from her. What was it though. She kept asking herself whether or not if she should ask him about it, or just leave it alone and believe him. Jasmine was then suddenly startled by Eggman as he spoken when she was lost in thought

“ I mean just the seven emeralds?  It’s just too good to be true!” he shouts with glee

Jasmine chuckles and looks up at the sky. All she saw was green and little sunlight twinkling between each leaf it reminded her of a chandelier.

“ Its has to be. Just the 7 emeralds,are you sure you didn't  miss anything else? “

There was a long pause basically ignoring the question afterwards. They continue their trip for a little while longer. Eggman stops at a edge of a rock wall that was completely covered in moss. Jasmine drags her hand across the moss, it felt very soft at the touch. She notices Eggman move his hand in a circular motion in a certain area of the rock wall. There was a loud thund then the earth rumbles and a secret door opens up exposing a black void. This place was giving Jasmine the chills. Eggman takes a step inside the temple and a green light comes on. Jasmine sees him holding a small lantern and we holds his massive hand to her,

“ Are you coming Jas?” Eggman lets out a smile and lets out a cough.

Jasmine takes his hand and they continue on.

Jasmine takes notice of her surroundings, not only was it green due to the light, but all the moss and overgrown plants. She sees a big spider in a corner of a rock, which made her uncomfortable. Not saying a word to each other the entire way they reach a large room. The room had a large plaque in the center that was written in ancient text. And there was a rock carving of a woman that was wearing a long dress that had a rope tied around her waist, she was shoeless,and had long wavy hair. This woman was also wearing a necklace a real necklace It sat close to her collarbone and there were large brown opals around it. Jasmine looks at Eggman

“ Is that what you are needing?”

Eggman nods in response “ yes, that is the power I need to rule over this world. However I need the 7 emeralds to do it.”

Jasmine looks at him with confusion. “ then why did you bring me here? We only have two left to get.”    

Eggman laughs “ Because I just wanted to show you something cool, I know how much you like seeing new places.” Eggman  lets go of her hand “ Go ahead and have a look”

Jasmine walks towards the statue and wondered who she was and what power does this necklace hold. Climbing  on top of the podium to get a better look at the necklace. She cringes at the site of it

Yuck, this necklace looks ugly. I hate opals.

Jasmine hops down not wanting to look at the necklace anymore than what she had to. She then examines the statue and admires her simple majestic beauty. The statue was pretty tall like a powerful goddess.

I wonder who she was in life. She must've been really important other wise nobody would of made a statue of her

“ We should get going jas, it is getting a bit late”

Jasmine was startled for she was lost in thought of this statue

“ oh uhm yes, yes we should”

Jasmine walks towards Eggman in a hurry and stops really close to him. She looks into his eyes she can't really see them sense they are hidden away from his pez-nez glasses.  Eggman backs off to break the bond and ushers Jasmine out of the room

“ Come on Jas, lets save the gaga eyes for later I know im a rare sight to see”

The walk back to the base was a bit quicker, but it was creepy for Eggman he usually drives his machines to get around he’s not used to walking around in places like this. Jasmine on the other hand enjoys this sort of thing. Jasmine was a nocturnal person she could stay up all night long if she wanted to. Jasmine looked at Eggman who kept looking over his shoulder and was really freaked out. Then there was a

*snap*   near by. Eggman nearly jumped out of his skin

“ WHAT WAS THAT?”  Eggman looks at Jasmine

Jasmine shrugs,

“ I dont know a wolf probably.”

Eggman looks around paniking trying not to lose it

“ a a a a wolf? Are you sure?”

Jasmine walks towards the sound of the snap. Eggman grabs her arm and pulls her to him

“ where are you going? I am not going to allow you go near such beast!”

Jasmine looks at Eggman in disbelief

“ really? I risk my life occasional fighting divine beasts and sometimes demons and you dont bat an eye. Then suddenly your like DON’T TOUCH MY WI-FU when there is a bloody wolf?”

Eggman lets her go in embarrassment scratching the back of his neck

“ um ehhh thats a good point, sorry jazzy.”

Jasmine pats him on the back

“ Its ok, your just scared, now I will go have a look I doubt ill find anything The wolf is more scared of us then we are it”

“ Then there is no point to look now. And im NOT scared” Eggman replied. Jasmine laughs and leans in close to him

“ then why are you so nerves for hu?”

Eggman ignores her remark and he continues to walk back to his base, and Jasmine follows along. It was silent for the remainer of the walk home and Jasmine lets out a huge yell scaring the living hell out of Eggman

“ WHAT THE HELL JASMINE?! YOU SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME!”

Jasmine was rolling on the ground laughing.

“ you should've seen your face. I been waiting to do that for a while”

Eggman picks Jasmine off the ground

“ Now your going to get it… just you wait”

Jasmine places her hand off like a damsel and sighs

“ oh no what's a poor girl gonna do? Somebody save me oh no….”

Eggman laughs at her little acting carrying her the rest of the way home. They finally arrived home the lights were shining very brightly. Eggman lets out of sigh of relief

“ Home sweet home, now to punish you my dear”

Eggman carries Jasmine up to her bedroom, plops her down onto the bed and begins to walk out of the room. Jasmine waits for him to return, An hour goes by Jasmine gets up from her bed to see what's taking him so long, but the door was locked

“ IVO YOU ASS!”

Now realizing that she was locked in her room until dawn she gets into her nightgown and slips back into her bed, curling up with her stuffed bear falling asleep.

Chapter 1: https://jasminerobotnik.tumblr.com/post/164707909083/fraudulent-gain-chapter-1

Chapter 3: coming soon...

[calpops]

together | c.h.

@notinthesameguey said: If you're able to 👉👈What about a lazy dinner and they just talk about the wedding? Maybe they're huddled in the living room eating some pizza and they joke about wanting some pizza at their wedding and yeah

1.3k words

dates with cal masterlist

Copyright © 2020 calpops. All rights reserved. This original work is not allowed to be reposted on any platform in any format (translations included).

<< >>

Calum comes home late but you’re not alone, the ring on your finger keeps you company and reminds you of his promises. You don’t tire of staring at opal and silver inlaid with flecks of diamonds. It’s not just the beauty of the ring that keeps your attention but the feeling that it evokes. When the front door finally opens you turn from your perch on the couch and wave Calum over as he enters with a grin. His first instinct when he reaches you is to hold your hand, let his eyes look upon the ring and then let his lips brush the back of your hand past a smirk. 

“That ring was made for you,” he says in a whisper as you pull him down onto the couch, the reality of being engaged coming down with you.

“Did you eat?” You ask, knowing how Calum’s schedule always becomes skewed when studio and rehearsal hours wear him thin. “We have left overs.”

“I could go for that,” Calum says but makes no move to get to the fridge where day old pizza lingers. Instead, he nuzzles into you and takes a moment to be with you.

Ever since the night of tears and questions of distance you’ve both gotten back on track to spending time together. No more tense moments of silence follow you, no more doubts or fears plague you during lonely nights. Simple things bring you back to normalcy. Taking an extra moment to linger with each other, spending mornings together, getting engrossed in a new book when sleepless nights ensue. Now, it’s all done with a ring on your finger and plans of a wedding in your heads.

“Let’s go together,” you suggest around a laugh when he still makes no move to get food. He whines in a low rumble at the thought of disentangling himself from your side but he complies; leftover pizza in an empty stomach too tempting to give up on completely.

After it’s heated in the oven and put on plates brought over to the couch you settle back into each other’s holds. Your legs are draped across his lap, shoulder under his arm and his free hand occasionally running through your hair. You can tell he’s tired, that a book probably won’t be read tonight, so you enjoy a lazy dinner with him and talk while you can.

“I told my parents today,” Calum says and you know he’s referring to the engagement. You had kept it between yourselves for a week, wanting to spend some alone time as fiancé’s without anyone else in the mix. “My mum squealed. She actually squealed over the phone, I think Duke’s ears hurt after.”

You laugh, head tossed back into the cushions as you imagine his mom animatedly squealing through the phone. Calum’s sister Mali and Ashton already knew, had helped pick out the ring on your finger, helped to plan the day that became a second chance.

“And your dad?”

“He couldn’t believe it at first. Then I think it hit him fully and he realized it’s you and it all made sense after that.”

You go flush at his comment. His family’s love and support means worlds and worlds to you. You remember how nervous you were the first time you met them, but then how easy it was as soon as they were near. Mali had taken to you the moment you met, his mother had hugged you like you were family without question and his father held pride and happiness in his eyes as Calum introduced you as his.

“Do you think Mali would be in the wedding?” You wonder, hoping she might be your maid of honor, knowing you want her with you and that Calum would too.

“I think if she’s not you won’t have a groom to marry because she’ll kill me,” Calum laughed but turned serious around another bite of his slice of pizza.

“A groom,” you repeat in a wondrous sigh. Calum smirks. “I can’t believe you’re gonna be my groom. I don’t think I’ve ever even seen you in a full fledged tux before.”

Calum’s smirk only deepens and his tone goes playful, “should it be blue or orange? How many ruffles?”

Your eyebrows shoot up but you wave him off. “Well that would be stupid. Then we’d be matching.”

He laughs and goes on a tirade asking you if he’d marry you in this or that. You always nod, say yes, and eventually tell him you’d marry him no matter what.

“Do we have anymore?” Calum asks, gesturing to the empty plate. “That pizza is so good, I would marry it,” he exclaims and it’s so easy for both of you to speak of marriage now it feels freeing and light. Before it was a topic to tiptoe around, to mention only late at night when the stars and moon disguised the future.

“Not if you marry me first,” you shoot back and point up at the counter where a few slices remain.

He grins, pats your legs before getting up to grab the last of it and settle back down with you.

“We should have it at the wedding,” he comments before a bite and just the word wedding is enough to excite you. His eagerness to mention it, to plan it even in small jests and jokes makes you realize how much he wants this and how much you want him.

“At the reception,” you say seriously and he turns to give you a curious gaze. “Nothing’s better than a party, some drinks and then pizza.”

“I knew I was marrying you for a reason. We could have it at the engagement party too.”

“Engagement party?” You question, completely unaware and feeling stuck in left field at the mention.

“You really think our friends will let us get engaged and not have some sort of party?” Calum rebuts lightly. “Ashton was planning one before I even picked out the ring.”

Calum finishes his last bite and leans back into the plush cushions of the couch, arms seeking you out to pull you against his chest. “I suppose that would be okay,” you muse, typically not one for making a spectacle. “But nothing too big or fancy, okay?”

Calum’s eyes dart from you to the ceiling and back again. “I’ll talk to him.”

“Just close friends?” You ask and bite your lip. “And family if they can come.”

“Your parents?” Calum questions timidly.

Your parents aren’t a subject you bring up much or much of presence in your life. They’ve never met Calum and to some it might be strange you’re engaged without your parents knowing your fiancé. But they’ve never worked that way. You’ve never been close and sometimes the distance hurts but you’ve had Calum and his family to make it feel better.

“Maybe…” you muse and lose yourself in thought for a moment. “Maybe we should invite them to dinner with just us first? That might be easier.”

“Whatever you want,” Calum replies and you believe his sincerity. “I’ll be right there with you,” he soothes as if he can feel the anxiety beating inside you. “We’ll get through it. Dinner, the party. And then we’ll be married.”

“Oh,” you smile. “It’s that simple? Why don’t we just elope?”

Calum shrugs. “I would if you wanted,” he says and rubs his hand up and down your arm. “Though it’d be a shame if no one else got to see how beautiful you’ll be in white.”

You blush. Still amazed he can elicit such reactions from you. “And you in your bright orange ruffled tux.”

He laughs and so do you. It doesn’t matter if you elope, if a crowd of hundreds gather, if you wear white and he wears orange. All that matters is you’ll be together. 

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[totoroses]

i found this lesbian survey and decided to fill it out!

Femme or butch? is this what do i prefer or which i am? im a femme and i have no preference in dating, i’ve been wildly attracted to both and any in between

Do you have a “type”? If so, describe it. the only nearly completely common denominator though my exes are having brown eyes? i have dated only one person who did not have brown eyes. i always feel safer looking into brown eyes then blue. i woudl say i have often gone after the romantic artsy type with good music taste and some kind of signature style about them, ironically none of which drew me to my current girlfriend who i believe is probably defintiely the love of my life

Plaid button-ups or leather jackets? leather jackets! i will swoon over smartly dressed gals in button downs as well as a chill gal in some plaid unbuttoned flannel but the two together make me think of a lumberjack

Describe your style. i usually go for one of two styles- softly dressed forest wanderer, or slightly sassy soft grunge. both include my doc martens, but one is more natural colours and old fashioned dresses and the other is sassy tshirts and 90sish thrift store finds like denim and dark florals

Describe your aesthetic.pressed flowers between the pages of a book on forest spirits, rose milk tea, silver rainy downpours, curly baby hairs, white peaches, a cat sleeping in a library, custard pastries, a circle of mushrooms in moss, opals and furry moths

Favorite article of clothing? my one forever 21 dress ive had since like junior year that i can wear without a bra and it has like a cool cross back i just looooveee ittt, then also my embroidered minty 1930s style qipao sort of dress

Favorite pair of shoes? my doc martens and green chinese embroidered lace up slippers

Current haircut? currently blonde (ugh) and currently my hair falls just past my breasts, the goal is to grow it to my bellybutton!

Any haircut goals for the future? i really wanna get on the thick fluffy bangs bandwagon but i dont think i have the stamina to put up with growing them out again smh

Describe the best date you’ve been on. there was this one date i went on with one of my high school girlfriends where we went to a bookstore and hung out and then stuck googly eyes all over my city on random monuments and street signs, and we also ate thai food and listened to music and it was still one of the most lovely dates. BUT my girlfriend recently visited me in taiwan and we went in a glass bottom gondola ride up a mountain and drank from coconuts and wandered through old streets and had the most amazing tea food with a spectacular view and it was heaven

Describe the worst date you’ve been on. probably the one where i went on a picnic with my first girlfriend who then broke up with me that same day and even though our entire relationship was so awkward and not what is should have been it still hurt so bad

Single? Taken? taken!

If taken, talk about your girlfriend/wife! where do i begin! my girlfriend is a slightly shorter than me girl named lynn who loved korean variety shows, drinking coca cola, listening to cheesy love songs, and playing tricks on people (especially me). she used to be a major tomboy in middle and high school and date all the girls and get slapped a lot, as well as mess with teachers and play pranks on them and steal things from their lunchboxes. more than half of her birthchart including sun, rising, and venus are scorpio, and she wants to start her own streetstyle online brand but has not yet found a catchy brand name!

If single, what are you looking for in a potential girlfriend/wife? :)

Describe your dream wedding my girlfriend says if we get married we need two, a traditional chinese wedding (she is from china) and a western one with a priest since i am catholic, and i couldnt agree more. my dream wedding includes just very close friends and family, extravagant lights and flowers and a reception party playlist chosen by me, catered by the teahouse we went to in taiwan. i know its so silly and superficial but i want the dreamiest dress that i design, wisteria everywhere, and most of all i just want lynn at the end of the alter looking stunning in whatever it is she decides to wear

Do you want kids? YES me and lynn talk about this a lot because we both love kids and both agree on at least 4, no more than 8. and we will share who carries the kids so not just one of us is having our uteruses worn out

If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live? guilin, china. but its a fantasy. guilin is real and beautiful but chinese laws make it so that even if we settle down there and build a house it cant truly belong to us, and in china you cant have a private business and it jsut sucks because the drema is to live in the quiet countryside with a simple life and beautiful scenery to explore together and with our children

Favorite lesbian movie? i love so many but im gonna go with the handmaiden!

Favorite lesbian novel/story? i havent read nearly enough, but  adore all things by malinda lo and julie anne peters! ash by malinda lo is probably my favourite. i have to still read sarah waters though, i hear she reigns supreme

Favorite lesbian song? don’t pull away by milosh ft jviews (the music video is gay at least, i also love hayley kiyoko)

Favorite lesbian musician? hayley kiyoko probably

What lesbian stereotypes do you fit into, if any? mmmm i dont like softball so that doesnt work...i read a lot of sappho though! and i have short nails? and love buffy? are these stereotypes?

Ever been assumed to be nothing more than a gal pal? ugh yes

If a woman wanted to woo you, what would a surefire way to accomplish that? write me a love letter or make me a mixtape about your feleings something cheesy

Be positive! What do you like most about being a lesbian? girls!!!!

Are you more of a cat person or a dog person? cat but i also love pups!

Turn ons? a musical wonderful voice i could listen to and listen to, easy and stimulating conversations, passion for something that lights up their eyes

Turn offs? rudeness in any shape or form, indecisiveness or feigning indecisiveness because you think i want to make the decisions, despicable movie and music taste, smell

Do you usually ask other women out or do you wait for them to ask you? mmmm in the past it has been pretty even. i have learned though that with women it really is a waiting game more than with guys so with my current girlfriend the tension was killing me so much i had to straight up ask her if something was going on and when she said yes she did like me too i was so relieved because she admitted to having not dated anyone since high school (5 years ago for her) and not asking anyone out while at college so if i had kept waiting for her who knows if we would have gotten together!

What is your dream career? i want to be a stay at home mom and author and perhaps an art teacher or preschool teacher on the side if the books dont pa the bills!

Talk about your interests or hobbies! writing and reading and drawing and singing and hiking and listening to music and watching korean dramas and making lists and studying languages

What is the most attractive quality a woman can have? passion, not necessarily in the sexual wya, but passion for something in general. like if she is an actress you see her on the stage and see how into it she is, and offstage she talks about it in a way that shows she is capable of truly loving something so much and seeing wonder in life. or a girl who seems quiet but then when she starts to show you the music she likes she closes her eyes and knows every lyric and has this expression of true passion and love for the music, i am captivated by women who are captivated by the purest elements of life from music to dance to nature

Do you love easily or does it take time for you to warm up to someone? for women, i fall in infatuation quite easily. i was always more cautious with men of course and now i avoid them altogether. but love is something i’ve been becoming more conservative of somehow. i think because i was so hurt by someone before and gave and gave without receiving and im scared of that happening again. i have to be receiving love to give it, thats something i finally can control my impulses over and protect myself from.

Ever fallen for your best-friend? HA

Ever fallen for a straight girl? HAHA

The L-Word: yes or no? (love it or hate it?) heck to the no i couldnt make it past two episodes 

Favorite comfort food? macaroni and cheese

Coffee or tea? tea

Vegetarian? Vegan? None of the above? none but i have tried vegetarian before

Do you have any pets? a chinchilla and a cat!

Early-riser or night-owl? night owl 

What is your sign? gemini sun, sag moon, sag rising

What is your Myers-Briggs type? INFP

Who was your first lesbian crush? my first serious lesbian crush was on a girl at my middle school who dressed to the nines every day in vintage dresses and sweaters and she flirted with practically everyone just joking around and always had a boyfriend but was just charming in every way. my whoel day would eb ruined if i couldn’t just see her or say hello once, and i thought i was just obsessed until i was like ‘wait what if she kissed me’ and BAM i knew it was a real life crush

At what age did you know you were a lesbian? im not really sure. i identified as bi/pan from freshman year to junior year i think, but then was realizing i definitely had a preference and didn’t want to be with guys in a relationship at all to be honest but even up until last summer i was really questioning if i was asexual, so its been a journey but i think i finally fully realized i am a happy happy lesbian after meeting lynn

At what age did you come out (if you have)? i was 14 when i first told my parents i was bi, 18 when i said im a lesbian 

Are you crushing on anyone at the moment (celebrity or otherwise)? just my girly friend

Talk about how your day went i worked this morning 7-11 after only sleeping 4 hours since i got hooked on ‘tipping the velvet’ the bbc miniseries, said goodbye to a friend, had school and did a presentation on how to make rosemilk bubble tea, i ate at a moomin cafe with my coworker, and now am working on homework and doing this survey and putting off my night cleaning duties eheh

Talk about your dreams/aspirations for the future  i just want to have a family and to have my books published, thats all i really need. a loving wife, my sister still by my side as my partner in crime, so many children, so many stories finally told that people are reading. i really want to build a lovely house for my family like my grandparents did once upon a time, with secret rooms and unique hiding places, a house they can pass down as they grow up and it can have our lineage. i want to live by the mountains and trees and water, i want to be able to speak mandarin, cantonese, korean, japanese, icelandic, italian, arabic, and polish fluently