#im going to miss it so bad... i need to have smth to dress up for next time though for sure for sure !!

[seithr]

I GOT A ROSE FROM A KNIGHT AT THE REN FAIREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

[crushedsweets]

in a far away universe where ninakate is canon in creeped verse how do u think their future together would be like? Like moving in with each other...getting married...adopting pets etc etc

AAGGGGHHH OK OK this is SUPER fantasy-type for me, not really realistic for the lore itself... but au where ninakate is canon is fantasty anyway so i do as i please. this is so fanficy and cheesy and stupid and goofy but i dont even caaareee they make me really happy I MISS MY GF(i saw her today. mb)

so this would happen LONG after kate finally heals from O/S syndrome. she is no longer a proxy, no longer has 'the chaser', has spent years working with toby, nat, jack, and nina to get better. get her GED, heal her overworked body, etc. i think kate would have to get a new identity/SSN from BEN so she can work. . . OR she'd wipe all of her missing person files and he'd get her a copy of her SSN, so everything can still be under her name?! i dunno, something super over-powered LMFAO

they'd move close to the coast. a quiet beach city filled mostly with old retired couples and young families. they rent out a small, quaint little house from an older butch/femme lesbian couple. its a short 30 minute walk from the beach (nothing for kate, good for nina). nina works as a nail tech, kate works at a morgue. lots of night shifts for kate, but nina has a disorganized sleep schedule, so she'll be awake when kate leaves and comes home. . .

nina would want marriage sometime into their 30s. without a doubt. and i dont think kate would mind. 'its a piece of paper' (its a legally binding life long commitment but she dgaf) .... nina would get so emotional talking about it, kate is like 'ok well why wouldnt i do it. make her happy.' nina wants a huge, dramatic, extravagant wedding... but i think they'd have a small, private wedding on the beach with very few people. nina wears a mermaid style dress with a dramatically long veil thats dragging all in the sand and was an obecjtively bad decision but kate said it was pretty so nina HAAAD to wear it. kates in a suit. with a pink little pocket square. cuz nina wanted to have pink in the wedding. they probably organized it all themselves, having them + toby and clocky thrift a ton of rando wooden chairs and toby/kate hand made the arch while clocky/nina put flowers all over it. AUGH. come on.

nina wants a chihuahua sooo badly sooo bad so bad. or a pommie. just some cutesy small dog. kate wants like a huge guard dog. smth smth 'for when im not around' and ninas always like oooooooo u care about meeee . LMFAOOOO. so maybe a pommie and a rottweiler .... crazy cute combo, of course .. .

they'd still have issues to get over. neither of them are very healthy partners for a long time, with nina being so horribly anxiously attached and kate being so distant and avoidant. kate being so bad at communicating would trigger the fuck out of nina. and nina is quick to raise her voice, and kate is selectively mute, so nina would trigger that as well. which frustrates nina, then upsets kate, which is a shitty cycle. nina has horrible self image and self esteem, and kate is NOT equipped to handle that - her appearance has never mattered to her, and nina being so worked up over superficial stuff is bothersome. they have a LOT going on that they NEED to work through. and since this is a fictional fantasy ship, THEY WILL LOL they will. because i want them to. and i think they deserve it.

auuughh i just. . . i like them :(

[possibilistfanfiction]

hey can I get some advice, if you have any? my friend is getting married and im invited, but I have no ideia what to wear. I'm afab, non binary, and pretty much closeted in all the ways that matter; I've been wearing men's clothes exclusively for a few years, but I only ever get read as female. I'm 26 and have avoided all family weddings so far in huge part because of formal wear, bc I would die if I had to wear a dress but I (so far) have not been brave enough to try wearing a suit, but this friend is the first of the friend group to get married and she actually wants me there (as opposed to getting invited by cousins and such just bc we're related) and I want to be there to support her. do you have any experience in choosing formal wear? in my place, what would you wear? is it better to go to a shop and risk them refusing to give me a mens suit or try to get something online and risk a bad fit? help!

there’s great suiting for dfab people that u can get either online or in store, depending on where u live. i don’t think you’ll get smth that fits horribly as long as you take ur measurements beforehand, plus most places have size consultants. wildfang has cool suits, they’re a little less formal (which can be great!) but easy to dress up/down & in the future wear as separates. kirrin finch is a little pricier but they make beautiful clothes for masc dfab ppl. both have a p decent size range. sharpe suiting & bindle and keep both do like GORGEOUS custom suits, but they’re expensive & u have to book in advance, so that might not be the vibe for this outing.

in store stuff, i actually rly like theory & all saints; theory is expensive but they have all kinds of different womens cuts, so u don’t actually need a mens suit, although like… no one will rly care if u go try one on? for me, either dfab specific menswear or just andro womenswear fits better, so i’ve stopped worrying abt that & just gone for fit. for less formal, cos & oak+fort have some cool co-ord options that could be fun, esp for a summer wedding. bigger department stores like nordstrom will also have a ton of options across price points

i also think an amazing option is to go to a thrift store, especially if you have a queer one in ur area (out of the closet!). they’ll have lots of options that aren’t too expensive, & will be able to help you find stuff.

& then finally, tailor it! tailoring isn’t that expensive at all (tailoring a suit will probably be under $50) & it’s so easy to make ur clothes fit the way u want them to!

also i will say — i actually hate full suits for myself, they’re way too masc for me & i just. never in my life do i rly wanna wear one lol. i like a good tuxedo pant & an expensive tee & a cashmere cardigan or smth, & i also have a few semiformal & formal kurtas to wear to stuff bc my wife is desi, so sometimes those make more sense & are fun n cute. if a full suit feels like too much, u can wear rly nice stuff that isn’t quite as masc or quite as formal, & it’s (arguably) even more in fashion rn

so just yknow whatever ur vibes are, there rly are so many options. have fun w it! clothes are supposed to be fun! definitely don’t let being scared of formalwear have u miss a wedding u wanna go to, i swear literally nothing is that deep lol

[hongjoongland]

~ 🏵️ COMFORT. PLACE~ |K. HJ. FLUFF|¬

~

~

~

genre:fluff&cinginess

pairing: kim×hongjoong&fem.reader××

warnings: none...just a lot fluff that'll melt ur heart<3

A/n: This is my first fiction. Hope you'll like that. This one is for those days when you dont feel most confident and happy... Love y'all<3*

A song:

I don't know what happened to me... just a few hours ago i was so happy and was dancing around the house but after seeing on tiktok those girl that look so beautiful it made me feel so sad...

I tought about it that much that my anxiety kicked in and the only thing that i needed to do was to cry. I cried my eyes out. I felt so... Empty so worthless i just felt like nothing. So i stoop up from the sofa and went to our room. And by our room i meant I have a fiancé. And he proposed to me like 2 months ago but thats another story. He is a producer and a songwriter. He also has a group that he produces and makes song with. He usually comes home latelly. Really overworked and sleepy. But altrough he is tired he always gives me attention. Always stays up with me to watch film together or smth. He never misses our anniversary NEVER. Hes the most caring boyfriend i've ever had. Im so thankful for him. He always made me feel so safe a d comfortable. Hes my comfort place.

Time passed by and i was showering because i felt like shit and i felt the need to wash my self up but uselessly i kept feeling the same way. I started to cry while i was showering. I stepped out of shower and dried myself up. I stood infront of a big mirror that we have in bathroom (dont ask me why is there a big ass mirror in a bathroom thx<3) and look in it. i was looking at all my inperfecions and those bad spots on my body. I was fat, have alot of strech mark all over my tights and on my belly, arms. Plus there is a lot of hair everywhere...

"I hate myself" as i started tearing up again. I started to dress up and then I went downstairs to find some kind of food that I'll be eating to cushion the pain.

It was really late and I was just watching some shows on Netflix when I heard someone opening the front door and it was my fiancé. He came in all sleepy with no signs of life. I guess it was a hard day for him too. But he immadientally changed his mood when he saw you laying on the couch. He was all happy and he just went straight into ur arms.

"Hi baby, how was ur day?" I asked him . He was laying now comfortably in ur arms breathing ur scent " hmmm could be better. It was hard day but now I'm happy that I see you and that I'm with you." he said calmly. "what about you hun?" " Well..." you said as you breathed out heavily. "Something didn't went right. Right?" He looked in ur eyes like he already knew the truth. He knows you very well. "Well... hongjoong you know me very well..and I gotta ask you one thing. Do you really think I'm pretty ?" You said unsurelly cause you knew that he will get mad, and thats not good thing. " Babe how many times do I have to tell you this? If ur not gonna get it then I'm gonna repeat myself on and on again. YOU.ARE.SO.DAMN.BEAUTIFUL.! No one is more beautiful like you no one. If I got a challenge where they ask me to choose between you or other women I would always choose YOU ! BECAUSE I LOVE ONLY YOU . babe don't go on any diet or anything because I can't imagine a kilogram of you body going away. I love your body I love your stretch marks I love all your perfect imperfections. You're my aphrodite. You're just as goddess as her. that's the only woman I can compare you to. Don't ever think about your body in this way, because people don't actually understand how much beautiful are you. Okay? And if it's not gonna work on you either...then imma have to punish you.This is your last warning "

"okay captain. Thank you for being here with me. What did I do in my past life to deserve you. I think I was Jesus " at this statement both of you were laughing. " Now my beautiful Rose, I think we should go to sleep it's very late" He said as he kissed your head and then your nose and as he slowly got up he kissed your hand and lift you up in bridal style to carries you to yall shared bed to sleep.

The rest of the night he was making sure he held you really close to him. He is really your ❤️comfort place💞

A/N: thank you for reading I Hope you enjoyed. And don't forget to love yourself❤️ Also Im taking any recommendations. So if you got something help me out please. 🙏 XOXO❤️

[squid-ink-symphony]

im really liking story mode and splatoon 2 in general so far, and i just got to the 4th area, so here are some random thoughts i have on it in no particular order.

I rlly like that Marie is basically the only other character here. I may be biased cuz she's my second fav character (shiver is number one ofc) but i just rlly like her commentary. But not have Callie here to also say random stuff is kinda sad..... Like at first i was like yessss lets go only Marie(no offense, i love callie). But i miss her :(

I may be one of the few sheldon enjoyers as someone who actually likes reading all his dialogue, so i appreciate him also being here.

THIS IS HARD. I know i suck at video games... but some of these levels just feel so LONG. And making me fight enemy octolings with a charger is evil. Anyway yeah i need some easier levels spread out between these like splat 3 had. Cuz this is..... not good. I have to keep taking breaks cuz the long levels do be mentally taxing. Like hello this is funny squid game i cant be bad at smth intended for kids. I havent straight up failed a level yet but ive come close.

Hello?????? The ruins of ark whatever its called salmon run map is so cool????? Why dont we have this in splat 3 yet. Its so fun.

speaking of salmon run, not being able to throw eggs or have the movement of splat 3 is so cursed. like, what do u mean thats not a thing????

Yeah the not being able to do the lil charge thing up wallls is so unsatistfying.....

I had to play as a guy cuz i wanted my splat 3 hair. (the ponytail) which i dont usually care about in games, but the girl inklings have cuter voices.... Oh well i am a dude now lol. Luckily gender is a game to me so i dont actually care other than the voice difference

Pearl and Marina my beloveds.... HOW COME WE DONT DONT GET STAGE SPECIFIC DIALOUGE IN SPLAT 3????? not only do deep cut not get many chances to speak in story mode they also have repetitive news segments...... so sad.. its ok i still love them. But yeah i love these funny creechurs. why are they like that. they say so many insane things. pearl and marina are so funky :D

Forcing me to use the hero charger for certain levels is so evil and messed up. I only like dualies, rollers, and sometimes brella. They cant do this to me.. I cannot aim....

As with splat 3 i am enamored with the backgrounds in the story mode levels themselves. i love just wasting like 5 mins just staring at them. I want to make literally any of them my desktop background but idk how to get a good pic of them.... man especially the upside down city looking one in 3. its so pretty and just UGH ITS SO GOOOD/

I am so poor..... what do u mean clothes cost money/?? i have to play the game??? all i want is to dress up my funny lil squid... i need a splatoon spinoff that is just a casual game thats like a dress up/room decoration game. maybe w like a cooking minigame too. thats ideal. like animal crossing or smth but squids. Shooting ppl is stressful.... (dont ask me why i play splatoon if i dont like combat cuz its scary. i couldnt tell u)

WHY ARE ALL THE INK COLORS IN THIS GAME SO MUCH PRETTIER THAN THE SPLAT 3 ONES???? ITS NOT FAIR. Some of these blue's are so pretty... i want...

none of the multiplayer maps have rlly stuck out to me in any way. Like they all just kinda feel the same lol. I think like maybe one or two i thought were cool? but idk the names. i def like the aesthetic of a lot of them.

I wanna just try all the weapons and specials but noooooo i gotta level up. just gimme everything ok

i also wanna explore the stages but as far as i know there isnt recon. I was just gonna do a private battle but turns out u cant do those w one person. And i was so excited cuz there were splatfest stages availbe too...... so sad i just wanna check out the maps but idk how to/if i can do that.....

the amount of times ive fallen off the map in the main level select area of story mode is more than i can count. its not even funny at this point

I also just cannot find some of the scrolls/sardines in some levels despite playing them mulitiple times. Not to just expose myself as incompetent over and over today, but i am 100% gonna need to look up a guide cuz i do not have the patience for this.

Also the rhythm game is surprisingly one of my fav things so far??? Like i am having the most fun ever with this thing. I want it in splat 3 so bad w all the new songs. Its actually just so fun. Like idk maybe better than story mode somehow. Maybe i just have my priorities wrong tho lol

Anyway yeah tats all i have 2 say for now... I think. idk im having fun w the game so yeah

[starglow-xx]

(About the brother!atsushi) aRE YOU READING MY MIND MISS?! Because that has been on my mind for MONTHS. TYSM For writing it was amazing!! If you don't mind, may I request (if requests are open) atsushi, still an older brother, but with a sister that's 10-13 yrs old? It's totally fine if you don't wanna do it. Keep up the good stories, ily mwuah!

*sobs* you’re so kind thank youu 🤧🤧

i wrote this a bit differently i hope that’s okay anon! at first i planned for this to be mainly abt atsushi and the reader, but i decided to add in relationship hcs with the agency bc i ran out of ideas

if you guys liked this don’t worry! im planning a special part two for this one so be the look out for it hehe

atsushi with a tween! sister

ft. the armed detective agency

like in my baby sister hcs, you’re still the most important thing to him period

the two of you got picked up by dazai and kunikida when he was 18 (obviously) and when you were 12

for a 12 year old, you were a bit small bc of malnourishment (which makes atsushi feel so bad) so both dazai and kunikida thought you were a bit younger than you actually were

they assumed you were about 9-10ish

you and atsushi both share a favorite food !! chazuke :)

so when kunikida treated the two of you, he made sure you got more bowls bc like i mentioned above, he feels really bad that you were malnourished and under weight

(don’t bring this up but kunikida felt bad too hehe)

when dazai went with your brother to the warehouse, you were with kunikida

imagine the surprise of the other ada members when kunikida came in with a little girl dressed in rags that popped out from behind him

kenji was the one who vocalized his thoughts 

“kunikida-san you have a daughter?! wow! i didn’t know that! :D”

when you found out your brother was a tiger, you were a bit concerned but you were actually kind of excited

you were even more excited when you found out the two of you were going to be taken in by the agency

anything was better than the stupid orphanage

and besides!

you got a tiger for an older brother and a bunch of other super powered agents to take care of you! who could want anything else?

at your age, you’re very impressionable and can be influenced easily so atsushi makes sure to teach you more in depth of good morals and the importance of kindness

his heart swells with pride and relief when he catches you being kind to others

pride bc he’s proud that even after all the two of you have gone through, you still ended up being a good kid and having a bright view of the world

and relief bc he hasn’t failed as a big brother

pfftt like he could ever fail

but please, from time to time reassure him that he’s perfect and the only big brother that you’d ever want bc he rlly needs that kind of validation

with his salary and savings, he tries to buy nice things for you

what a sweetheart 🥺

he saw you eyeing that one dress at a store window? fast forward abt a week and half and it’s inside a pretty gift bag for you

you wanted to try that dessert from the nice bakery? that’s dessert after dinner at one point

but other than buying you things, he sets money aside for you

like all the time

(y/n), here have this, you might need it”

“but nii-san you just gave me—”

“take it”

#1 spoiler

also your #1 confidant and source of physical affection

you tell him anything and everything (except crushies and those kinds of things)

atsushi loves it when you talk abt your day and he can see the big smile on your face and the sparkle in your eyes

it gives him the strength to keep going 😖😖

the two of you aren’t as touch starved as you’d probably think, but that’s only bc the two of you had each other

in your opinion, no one can match the hugs of your big brother

and it got even better bc YAYY he has tiger arms now ٩(◕‿◕)۶

if you ask, he’d carry you around too hehe

you also get nightmares quite often so he’ll always be there ready to calm you down, talk if you need to, and rock you back to sleep

god i love him 🤧🤧

atsushi will do everything in his power to protect you and make sure you get to grow up happy, supported, and loved

port mafia attack? oop he’s already taking you to the nearest escape route

someone is starting to harass you? they just got suckered punched into the next week

you want to go out to have some fun? he’ll go ask the president for a day off

you’re not feeling well? he’ll take another day off and take care of you

whatever you want to do, he’ll do it with you! (as long as it’s within reason)

will always be your #1 supporter! and he’s the president of your fan club hehe

he loves you so so much and will do anything for you; your life and happiness will always be more important to him

you are his reason to keep going

agency head canons !!

atsushi is your big brother, but kunikida is most definitely some sort of father figure

everyone can see it

except kunikida of course

kunikida scolds you lightly if he thinks your manners need work or if you make a mess in the agency

you listen to him of course and in turn as some sort of a reward, he’ll give you pieces of stationary

he always gives you the nice, good quality kind and you’re over the moon

atsushi adores it when you come running to him showing your new notebook or fountain pen and blabbering what you’re going to do with it

sometimes it isn’t even as a reward for being a good child; he’ll just give it to you and he’ll say smth like “i noticed you’ve used up your last notebook quite quickly, so here’s another one” or “did you run out of ink? here have this then”

he usually has a soft spot for children in general, but he most definitely has a soft spot (or a thousand) for you

yosano is kind of like a motherly figure to you

she gives you the guidance a mother should and goes on shopping trips with you!

atsushi always gets dragged along by you, but he thinks it’s worth it seeing you look so happy

yosano being a doctor also tries to teach the things you should know, or things that would be helpful to you

she’ll teach you the basics of cooking, sewing, how to treat a cold/fever, etc

also gives you excellent advice 1000% of the time

“remember (y/n)-chan if someone hurts you come tell me and then i’ll chop them into—”

“yOSANO-SENSEI DONT TELL HER THAT—”

fukuzawa is like a father to most in the agency but you see him more as a grandfather figure

bi weekly tea and gossip sessions hehe

along with cat talk!

most of the time though, it’s just you talking and him listening to you, but the two of you enjoy it nonetheless

“and then kunikida-san ended up crashing into a pole and dazai-san started to laugh at him and i did too because it was really funny but we ended up getting scolded—”

“hmm i see...”

he’ll let you stay in his office as he fills out paperwork; you’re usually doodling or drawing in your notebooks

sometimes he’ll meditate and you’ll join him, but 4/7 times you’d fall asleep

you always wake up with a blanket over you

dazai is like a cool but a highly concerning and kind of high maintenance uncle

frequently takes you out with him when he ditches work

walks in the park, eating at uzumaki so he has the excuse of treating you so he doesn’t have to pay his tab avoiding kunikida and sometimes chuuya and akutagawa, all that fun stuff

also tries to not talk abt suicide in front of you especially if it’s just the two of you alone

he knows that you mean the world to his pupil and that said pupil would probably hate him for putting suicide inside your brain

he teaches you random but useful things like how to pick a lock, how to steal kunikida’s notebook if you’re looking for some information, how to sweet talk your way out of things, etc.

is also the one to tell you that if you ever get a significant other to introduce them to the agency first

he always wants all of your gossip; some of them work pretty well for blackmail

“dazai-san! dazai-san! did you know that kunikida-san lost his glasses and he was looking for them for nearly an hour when he was just holding them the entire time??”

“woah really (y/n)-chan?! hey hey can you say it again into this recording device so kunikida-kun would believe me when i tell him—”

always ends up giving kunikida a heart attack when he says that you’ve been with him all day

ranpo is also like a cool but a highly concerning and kind of high maintenance uncle

will share some of his snacks, but don’t push it or you might not get anything at all

loves it when you compliment him

if you tagged along with him and your brother on a case, he will show off to impress you

“...and that’s how the crime happened”

“UWAHH RANPO-SAN YOU’RE SO COOL”

atsushi is lowkey and kunikida is highkey stressed that ranpo’s eating habits will rub off on you

“ne (y/n)-chan do you wanna try this highly caffeinated drink and this concerning amount of sugar filled snack?”

“can i really?!”

“rANPO-SAN NO—”

ranpo definitely does stuff like that on purpose 

the tanizakis are like siblings to you!

a weird set of siblings but siblings nonetheless

the two of them adore you and think you’re precious

atsushi definitely knows how to do your hair whether it’s long or short but he got even better at it when he asked the two

hehe braid trains are definitely a thing + kyouka and kenji (and maybe even dazai)

sometimes you have sibling swap days

you’re with junichiro for most of the day and atsushi is with naomi

strange i know

each of the tanizaki siblings try to make it fun bc they know that the two of you did not at all have a happy upbringing

junichiro likes spending time with you by taking you out to different places that naomi likes to frequent

like the mall, different stores and restaurants, the park, places like those

naomi does the same thing with atsushi so if you ever bump into them, you go out and eat together :)

besides atsushi, the next one in line who spoils you the most would be junichiro (and yosano & kunikida both coming in at a close third)

he honestly can’t help it; you remind him of how naomi was when she was younger

and besides

he’s always been a sucker when it came to the happiness of a little sister

“would you really buy this for me junichiro-san?!”

“of course! don’t worry about it” :)

wanna talk abt boys/girls/celebrity crushes things like that? naomi is your girl

you feel a bit embarrassed to go talking to yosano or your brother abt that and kyouka does not know a thing abt them either

“uwahh naomi-san look at all these people in this magazine! they look so good!”

“right?! but of course onii-sama is still the best—”

you get along with kenji and kyouka quite nicely being roughly the same age as them; they’re also like siblings!

just pure, wholesome vibes from the three of you

you’re over the moon when she finds out that kyouka is staying with you and your brother

atsushi is twice as happy seeing you talk your mouth off and finally having a girl around your age to talk to

“do you think demon snow can change how she looks?”

“hmm... im not sure...”

you and kenji talk abt anything and everything

he even teaches you how to take care of plants!

sometimes the two of you are kind of in the same boat bc you don’t know much abt yokohoma being stuck in the orphanage and kenji doesn’t know much abt cities in general

“wait where are we again kenji-san?”

“ah we’re close to the ports! but im not really sure how close because i don’t know what the symbols on this sign mean”

“don’t worry! neither do i!”

bonus things!

yosano was kind of too late teaching you abt you know what

“NII-SAN IM BLEEDING IN BETWEEN MY LEGS”

you’re sobbing in the agency’s bathroom and atsushi is panicking trying to get you to open the door

“Y/N?! H-HOLD ON LET ME GET YOSANO SENSEI”

ranpo overhears and cackles making everyone around him confused

suddenly atsushi bursts in the agency basically on the verge of tears rambling incoherent sentences abt the bathroom, you, and blood

it just clicked for everybody in the room

(im going to pretend that kenji has sisters back home so that atsushi is the only one who remain oblivious here hehe)

atsushi is genuinely confused and sort of concerned that no one is freaking out with him

yosano waves her hand saying smth like that she’d take care of it and junichiro pulls atsushi to the side to talk to him

fast forward like half and hour and dazai and ranpo are cackling on the looks of both of your faces

honestly not sure who’s more traumatized, you or your brother

“why does this have to happen” :(

“ne ne (y/n)-chan!~ you’re too young but at some point you’re not going to have it!”

“uwahh really dazai-san?” :D

“yeah! but first you have to have ANFK—”

next thing you know your ears are being covered by your brother and dazai is thrown across the room by kunikida

you know

the normal

you’re twelve and have never gone to school, but the agency takes care of that

it’s too dangerous to go to school so they teach you what’s necessary and whatever else they can

kunikida takes care of math (obviously)

yosano takes care of science/biology/anatomy/health (whatever you wanna call it)

ranpo even dragged poe to help you with english

atsushi even got lucy to help you out with english too!

as tanizaki and naomi used to be students, they give you their old work books and they try to teach you all the other subjects

sometimes kyouka and kenji are there learing with you too!

sorry if there’s some errors! i’ll read through it again later :)

and as always, reblogs and shares are appreciated! i hope you all stay safe! and just in case nobody told you they loved you today, i love you! you are enough! <3

writing belongs to me! please do not plagiarize! the reblog button is there for a reason

[hxneekyuu]

first date || kozume kenma, iwaizumi hajime (f!reader)

request : hi! ☺️ can i request first date headcanons (or a blurb, whichever one!!) with kenma and/or iwa ?? reader can be fem or gn! thank you sm 🥰🥰🥰

warnings : kenma is a big dummy

a/n : yall know i had to throw the seijoh four in there they thrive on chaos

kozume kenma

mans probably doesnt even know its a date im so sorry

when you ask him to get lunch with you, hes just like

yeah sure

but he notices that youve dressed up a little bit and that you seem really nervous when he finally shows up

and suddenly hes like

should i have dressed better?? is this okay?? why is she nervous whats happening im getting nervous now

you guys are friends, what is making you so nervous ?? you eat lunch tg all the time and yet hes never seen that lipstick before,,, or the way you keep pushing your food around but not really eating it 

“why arent you eating?” his voice is soft and vaguely disinterested as always, but hes watching you really closely, waiting for you to tell him whats wrong

when you tell him its nothing, he feels like hes definitely missing something, but when the waitress comes by and mentions how cute you look together hes like 

“oh--”

he puts it tg pretty easily after that 

and now his hands are getting kinda cold which only really happens when hes nervous 

he doesnt know if he wants to ask just to clarify or if he feels really embarrassed about having to ask because he doesnt want you to find out that he had no idea this was a date

and now hes really worried about how he looks like wtf who shows up to a date in slippers why didnt he put rEAL SHOES ON

when you guys are outside he offers to take you to get coffee or ice cream or smth and you give him a look bc he literally never wants to do anything except be at home 

aaaand now hes wondering if he misread it again and that its actually not a date

hes having a Bad Time 

finally hes like fuck this and just kinda ,, slaps his hand into yours

its not subtle or cute or soft hes like WHAM and just grabs your hand and keeps walking 

but when you dont do anything except yelp a little from the impact like wtf bro calm down no need for the aggressive hand holding , hes like

,,,,, okay so this is definitely a date right

hes really bad at this give him a break 

you guys are probably going to need to talk after he walks you home bc hes going to be thinking about it all day and not doing much of anything else until he finally calls you bc hes so confused 

overall a complete disaster but he really is trying his best 

iwaizumi hajime

he’s never going to admit this to anyone ever but he asked oikawa about his date idea and also for help picking an outfit 

the second part he didnt actually ask for, tooru is just Completely Committed to the plan 

at first hes like what about dinner and a movie ??? 

and oikawas like

this is why you cant be trusted 

so instead of taking you out for dinner at some stuffy restaurant and then to a movie theater where you cant talk 

oikawas like what if you just invite her over and make dinner and then just make the movie background noise so you guys can actually ,,, you know,,, talk 

and iwa’s like NO THATS SCUMMY SHES GONNA THINK IM BEING SCUMMY

and oikawas like THEN DONT BE SCUMMY ABOUT IT YOU HEINOUS BITCH

they almost threw hands over this conversation but thats for another day

so iwa invites you over and hes so nervous that he almost chops his damn finger off making you dinner 

but somehow he doesnt come off as nervous bc hes iwaizumi hajime 

he looks so calm and collected and charming and sweet

hes making so much conversation and asking you about your day and your life and everything he can think of

and its so damn smooth but really hes trying to distract you from how his hands are shaking bc hes actually just a big nervous dork

and to top it all off hes a great cook hes literally perfect that man 

he asks what movie you want to watch and actually really is begging you silently to pick something you really want to watch so that it doesnt seem like hes just trying to put smth random on before he seDUCES YOU

and right when you guys are sitting down to watch the movie, he looks out his apartment window and boom--

matsuhanakawa 

hes on the third floor how the fuck are they outside his window 

where did they get that ladder

how do they all fit on it at once 

the world may never know

and then his entire cool composure comes crashing down and hes like 

OI FUCK YOU GUYS 

angry iwa-chan stomping over to the window

he really could have done that better he totally could have ignored them

nope hes seeing red and chewing them out at the window 

but youre laughing your ass off bc there goes your date, once charming and calm, off to whoop some ass 

honestly he thinks hes not getting a second date, but how could you not want a second date? hes iwaizumi hajime

[incorrect-ikevamp-quotes]

Hello yes, could you elaborate on the Comte wedding event pleease. Crying and fangirling and dying are all acceptable. I missed it and I adore your rambles about Comte? Thank you either way.

!!! I’d be delighted to!! And awww, I’m so glad :D I love to write about him in any capacity, it makes me so happy to know people enjoy it when I do! Tysm for the full license to cry/fangirl/die because lbr it ain’t a Comte event if all three of those things don’t happen .Please don’t worry, I don’t mind talking abt it anyway! 💕💕💕

Okay my fellow Comte stans, you know the drill! I’ll be placing the details of the Wedding Story Event (jpn version) below the cut! Please don’t read if you want to wait for the official translation, and I hope you enjoy if you do take a peak! c:

AIGHT Y’ALL in fair Verona where we lay our scene-- This event begins on a lovely summer day with Comte and MC at a boutique picking out a wedding dress for their upcoming ceremony. As usual, she provides a bit of background as to how we got here. Comte doesn’t have a proposal event (as far as I know) like the other suitors because he actually proposes marriage in his MS. I won’t go too far into details just in case, but they essentially swear their love to each other in a church at night--just the two of them. (I’m not 100% sure, but I think this event takes place on the anniversary of the vow that they shared, what Comte called becoming “a vampire’s bride.” Yes it’s as hot as it sounds AND I LOVED IT). Now, despite their private promise to each other, Comte does specify that he fully intends to have a public wedding whenever she feels comfortable doing that. As such, this event is picking up from there.

With all the nitty gritty settled, it’s time to get to the fun bits. So Comte is weaving in and out of the dresses, trying to find the perfect one for his beloved. MC is equal parts exasperated but amused, and she notes that it reminds her so much of when she first debuted in high society (reference to the beginning of Comte’s MS). Back then, when she agreed to debut, he told her that he would immediately send word to his tailor to make the necessary preparations. It’s a kind of nostalgic moment; she remembers how thorough and excited he was (”I’ll be sure to show off your every charm”), and he’s effusing that energy in the boutique too. Eventually he settles on two of them and requests that they both be prepared, and MC sputters. She’s like Comte???? W H Y we only need one dress???? And he insists that, since it’s a special occasion, there’s no harm in it is there? He also goes on to say that it is in line with her culture’s tradition of “dyeing the bride in the husband’s colors.” MC shoots back that the tradition doesn’t entail several wedding dresses for the bride, but he pays the correction no mind. Y’all. I loved this part because it just emphasizes how much of a LIL SHIT he can be. Like he’s 100% harmless but I was like BOI IF U DON’T--I WILL KISS UR CUTE FACE. YOU STOP THAT.

I find it interesting especially because it remains in line with a trend about Comte that is so arresting for me, something that I find so endearing about him. I’ll note other places in the event I find it, but in this moment he is revealing something critical: for all of his capacity to play with the language and expectations that other people have/use, he only ever uses it for good. Here he’s purely being playful (with a stark note of respect and awareness); he has no intention of overwhelming her or undermining her cultural expectations of what a wedding means. Especially because MC, even in her monologue, isn’t truly upset--she honestly seems to find it adorable and funny more than anything. It’s also clear that Comte is working within her comfort zones. While he would buy the entire damn boutique if she let him, he settles on two because he knows it would stress her out otherwise (MC tends to be p pragmatic, not really about extravagance she is a mood).

And so they make their selection and exit the boutique, and they’re walking arm in arm back to the carriage. Comte laments narrowing it down to only two, but he’s happy they found something nice. MC thanks him for bringing her along, but he says it’s only natural--he wanted to pick out the dress the world would see together, he would never be happy with it otherwise. MC melts (WHO WOULDN’T) and says she’s really looking forward to wearing them, and he’s shook AF. 

(OKAY BUT I NEED TO SCREAM ABOUT THIS. DOES HE UNDERSTAND HOW TOUCHED I AM. DOES HE KNOW. His route hammers home this idea that for Comte, being with someone absolutely means being on the same page. It means being there for each other yes--but it also means making sure the other person feels wanted and included. He could have so easily just picked his favorite and been like “yeah this is what we’re going with.” But not only does he not do that, he refuses the very idea of a ceremony without it. He wants this to mean something for both of them, and he’s more than willing to put in the time and effort to ascertain that. I’M FUCKING TENDER OKAY. HE CARES SO MUCH AND I SOB)

He asks her if there’s anything else that she really, really wants for their wedding, and she thinks it through. It’ll be a reasonably sized wedding, with the men of the mansion in attendance and most of their closer high society friends. They’ve picked out a dress, the venue is set, the people closest to her will be there...she really can’t think of anything else? So she asks him if he has anything he really wants to do for the wedding, and he replies in the negative too, saying that “My only ideal wedding can be one in which I can see you at your most happy." ARE YOU KIDDING ME--Before MC can recover from that, he goes on: "Even now, I'm enjoying the preparations, and I want to do whatever I can for you." MC feels like she can never win against his sweet affection, so she nearly kills him with her answering line: "It’s more than enough. More than anything, being able to swear our love together again--to renew our vow--is the best part of it all." Comte is visibly shocked and is quiet for moment (MAN DOWN!!!!!!!!! VAMPIRE DOWN GET THE DEFIBRILATORS!!!!! LEONARDO PUT THAT LIGHTNING ROD AWAY I SWEAR TO GOD--) before he just replies with a “Is that so :>>>” And translating this nearly killed me [At the sight of his gentle smile, I smile back.] IM GOING TO SCREAM THEY ARE JUST SO TENDER IM SOFTE????????????

As they’re walking, Comte asks MC to tell him about weddings in her time. What were they like? He wants a reference point. She goes on to describe how ceremonies really range from formal to more informal affairs, and gets to a little custom that’s apparently held in Japan. When a groom intends to marry a bride, he will go to the bride’s family to ask for their approval. Comte visibly seems concerned about it, and I’m pretty sure he feels bad denying her that experience; not only did he propose to her without knowing any of that, her family isn’t within range to be able to honor it properly now. Even so, he keeps listening and comments now and again with a great deal of interest, paying close attention. He asks, what happens if the groom is rejected by the family? MC goes on to say that it’s a kind of test of perseverance: the groom is expected to ask/prove himself until he gets an answer in the affirmative. Internally, she notes that such a thing rarely ever happens irl--it’s mostly dramatized in movies and TV shows. She used to dream of how thrilling it might be to have someone do that for her, but it was mostly just a silly little fancy, nothing she was obsessed over. Comte, being a literal fucking legend, senses this emotional shift in milliseconds, and starts musing about something. When she tries to ask what’s up, he’s like not to worry leave everything to me.

PLEASE CUE THE CIRCUS MUSIC. BECAUSE THIS IS ABSOLUTELY GOING TO TURN INTO A CLOWN FEST.

So it cuts to them back home and Comte is asking Sebastian to give MC’s hand in marriage. Sebastian is utterly bEWILDERED and is like “I mean I understand I’m probably the closest relative she has right now but also WHAT!? YOU’RE MY BOSS/LORD I’M YOUR BUTLER FOR CRYING OUT LOUD”. Comte 100% is undaunted by this very normal reaction and insists that class/status has no place in matters like this, and Sebastian and MC are desperately trying to stop him from bowing his head/kneeling. MC notes she never expected him to take it to heart, tells him "Comte, you really don't have to go that far, it's a custom not a duty--" (IT’S SO FUCKING FUNNY????? YOU CAN FEEL THEIR MOUNTING CONCERN AND I CAN’T BELIEVE COMTE WAS STRAIGHT UP JUST “i am not above begging” AND THEY’RE LIKE YOU SHOULD BE YOU SHOULD BE ABOVE BEGGING)

The circus only escalates when Leo comes in LAUGHING HIS ASS OFF "damn...bahahahhahahaaaaa now THIS oughtta be good/interesting." MC (and I simultaneously) start yelling at him and he replies "What? Comte's already ready and willing, why stop him?" For whatever reason, this gives Comte an idea (NEVER A GOOD SIGN) and he’s like you know what? That’s actually perfect, get everybody in here I’m gonna ask them for permission too :D

Several things I want to say about this. 1. COMTE LITERALLY DOES NOT EVEN REACT TO LEO’S MOCKING HE JUST “omg ur face was useful for smth for once this gives me an idea” 2. META TIME. First and foremost, I seriously can’t deal. This man knows MC has nothing because of her traveling through time, no friends or family--he’s always so, so aware of what she’s sacrificing to be with him. It is never outside of his thinking. Not only does this decision solidify her presence as a member of their family (I’m just so UGLY SOBBING about the fact that he does not consider them all ANYTHING LESS--THEY ARE HIS CHIRREN AND HE LOVES THEM AND I’M SOFT) this is also such a brilliant, strategic move on his part. Not only is he doing this to fulfill her younger wishes of having someone be so confident in their love for her that they would insist on it in front of her family/loved ones--his doing this also solidifies her presence as his wife within the mansion from here on. There can be no mistake; this is an unquestionable statement as to how her identity has shifted in meaning, a powerful allusion to his possessive streak. (and WE LOVE THAT FOR US HELL YEAH) 

Furthermore, I continue to be fascinated by the way he keeps subverting traditional or expected forms of supplication. While many could see this as a yielding of his pride (and in some ways he undeniably is) this choice to acknowledge her culture’s customs yields much more valuable dividends for him. 1. MC--notorious for never betraying the things she wants, having trouble asking for anything--is have her dreams fulfilled even if they were just silly little fantasies from when she was young. He’s actively making her happy, and he gets to openly gush about how much he loves her (FOR HIM THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF A WIN-WIN YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND--) 2. This is a way for him to make amends and do proper respect to the marriage customs of her place/time, and that’s infinitely important to him. He’s trying to set a precedent; that even if he ever does make a mistake or neglect something (even if accidental) he will do his utmost to make it right, pride and money be DAMNED. 

While it can be argued that he’s just being silly and over-the-top, when you look closely this is 100% a clever, very mindful approach to their future. While it may partially have been executed on an emotional/excited whim, he is also claiming MC as his own in the most clear and respectful way possible. And tbh that’s the hottest thing I’ve ever seen 

So, after Leo walks in on them everyone else starts filing in one at a time (OKAY YOU CAN’T CONVINCE ME THAT THEY WEREN’T ALL HUDDLED UP TO THE DOOR SQUIRMING TO HEAR WHAT WAS GOING ON AND AT SOME POINT LEO SAID “omfg i gotta see this dumbass bitch on his knees” AND BLEW THEIR COVER/MADE THEM EVEN MORE CURIOUS):

Jeanne: "It's so noisy in here." 

Mozart: "What's going on?"

Comte: "Ah, excellent timing. I want to get permission from everyone."

Vincent: "?????? Did you do something wrong Comte?? What could you possibly need forgiveness for?"

Isaac: "A mistake made/wrongdoing by Comte?...Why am I dreading what it could be..."

Dazai: “Ah yes, yes I see, you are asking for a young lady's hand in marriage” (IM WHEEZING BC EVERYONE ELSE IS SO LOST AND HE'S JUST 100% ON THE BALL KNOWS EXACTLY WHAT'S GOING ON THE NARRATIVE DISSONANCE IM CRYING)

Theo: Young lady??? The hell are you going on about

So things are getting increasingly chaotic and MC is just [jfc this is getting out of hand, Comte they don’t even know what you’re asking them to do]. She tries to explain but falters, and Comte puts an arm around her--signals that he’ll give  them the context. So he tells them "You all know that our wedding day is approaching. As such, I'm asking you all for your approval in taking MC as my bride. No matter what happens, I promise to make her happy forever--for every moment, every second of our time together. Please, forgive my taking her" (WHEN I TELL YOU MY HEAD WAS IN MY HANDS IDK HOW MC DIDN’T DIE ON THE SPOT S I R. SIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) MC: [...Comte...My heart melts at his confession, at his earnest plea. It feels like every single iota of our feelings are infused in every word he speaks, teeming with the love shared between us in overwhelming measure.]

For a little while silence falls until Napoleon speaks up, and honestly? It was so sweet ;-; I tear up every single time: “Forgiven. You know how much I dislike formalities anyway. And besides, who could say no to le Comte?” MC notes that everyone murmurs in agreement and a kind of warmth settles in the room. Arthur notes that MC will be a Comtesse very soon and MC just. I’m going to be a WHAT now (”C-c-comtesse??”). And it’s so FUCKING FUNNY YOU CAN FEEL THE RED EYE EDIT MEME ON COMTE WHEN HE GOES “Oh? Is there anything wrong with that? Everybody said yes, after all :>” MC internally accuses them of ganging up on her, but reveals that more than anything she’s a little overwhelmed by the outpouring of love in the best way:

MC: [Overwhelmed with feeling; touched, a little shy, embarrassed, but also full of joy--my eyes burn at the edges with tears] “I'm glad everyone approves c:”

Comte: Agreed :> your country/homeland has a nice custom. A v important step to inviting my loved one into my life as my wife :>>>>

So it then cuts to them in Comte’s room after the circus and MC thanks him for the sweet confession in front of everyone, tells him how happy it made her. He insists that it was only natural he would, and that it isn’t even enough.

Comte: “I am the one...your life, your time as a human being; I'll be taking all of it from you.”

MC: [...Comte? He took my hand with a very serious expression]

Comte: "As I said before, I will make you a vampire someday."

MC: “Don't call it that--a price. I want to live with you too!”

MC notes that while she hasn’t made the leap yet, she knows she’ll be ready for it soon enough. 

Comte: “Thank you. But the last thing I want is to take things from you, I want to do everything I can to make you happy, to make you smile. Whether that means weddings, requests--anything in my power.”

COMTE REALLY SAID "she is entrusting me with her future and that means I have the responsibility of not only ascertaining her happiness, but proving my unwavering devotion to it" AND IM HOLLERING????? LADIES GET YOU A FUCKING MANS. MC finally begins to understand this, and she’s like OMFG is that why you went off so hard this afternoon???? And Comte’s like :>>>> guilty as charged, though I think I'm also just still excited about the wedding too, haha! They hug it out (YESSSSSSS LET ME H O L D) and MC asks him again if there’s anything he wants for the wedding too. Aight y’all I would be irresponsible if I didn’t warn you beforehand, get fucking tissues. I’m still upset abt his answer and I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL. He thinks about it for a bit, before kissing her forehead and saying “I suppose, can you pray for my happiness too? That's enough."

AIGHT IMMA GO BACK TO THE EVENT IN A SECOND BUT I GOTTA SAY. BITCH. BITCH ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME????? COMTE THAT ISN’T OPTIONAL THAT’S A GOD DAMN PREREQUISITE?????????????????? OFC WE WISH FOR YOUR HAPPINESS WHAT THE FUCK??????????????? THE A U D A C I T Y. I’VE NEVER BEEN MORE INSULTED IN ALL MY LIFE. OKAY RANT OVER.

MC is surprised but naturally agrees to it, having wanted that for him even without prompting. She continues to think on it, insisting that she wants to do something for him too. An idea sparks but it only says that she made preparations without telling him anything for now, preparing a tangible sign of her love for the wedding.

The premium end begin here. She’s getting dressed for the wedding, and she’s--as usual--in awe of his perfect selection of accessories/jewelry to go with the gown. She’s about to put on her shoes when she notices something odd, and there’s a knock at the door. Comte enters to ask if she’s ready, and they both freeze and stare at each other. They both sheepishly admit to being completely taken with the sight of the other, and they laugh about it together. Comte tries to ask if she’s ready again, and she assures him that she is--just that she found something unexpected in her shoes.

He explains that the coin is an English six pence. Sebastian told him that they are no longer made in her time, and Comte explains he acquired it about three hundred years ago in England when he was living there (he says that he kept it back then because he liked the design on it). He explains that there is a tradition, that the English would put a six pence in a bride’s left shoe in the hopes of wishing her good fortune and prosperity in her oncoming union. MC has her understandable and customary (JESUS I FORGET HOW OLD THIS MAN IS SOMETIMES) and he places a hand over hers that’s holding the coin when she starts staring at it. 

Comte: "Hey, MC....Time goes by, and various things will continue to change. Among them, it is only vampires who survive without dying or changing."

MC: "Comte..."

Comte: "I used to think that made it--made us--empty. But...I don't think that's the case anymore. I'm proud of being able to keep this undying, unchanging love for you."

[He put the coin back in my left shoe, and offered them to me--gentle as though they were made of glass(Cinderella's)]

MC spends this exchange on the verge of tears, but keeps it together for the wedding. It depicts their loved ones all around them as they walk down the aisle, and skips to the end of the ceremony. The priest tells Comte he may now kiss the bride (WHEN I WAS TRANSLATING IT SAID “KISS YOUR BUSINESS” AND WHEN I TELL YOU I WHEEZED), but just as he’s about to lift her veil--she stops him in his tracks. He’s confused, and says her name, but she reassures him that she just wants to offer him a wedding gift before he lifts it. Hidden in her bouquet are two pins that she had made, and she pins them to his jacket. They were made from preserved flowers, encased in metal to render them undying/everlasting. 

MC: [Me too...I want to wish for your happiness...]

MC: “For you, things might feel fleeting--like they just pass you by, are lost before you can grasp them. But even so, my feelings won't change; just like this preserved/undying flower and the life of a vampire--dedicated to [Comte's real name] in everlasting love."

COMTE.EXE HAS CURRENTLY SHUTDOWN. REBOOTING.

MC notes that his eyes get misty and he leans his forehead against hers.

MC: [Comte's real name]? 

Comte: .................I want to hug you as tight as I possibly can, but I'd hate to ruin the flowers/your gift to me

BITCH WHEN I TELL YOU I SOBBED. WHEN I TELL YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 1. I CANT GET OVER THE FACT THAT HER GIFT IS NOT ONLY CANON BUT ITS LITERALLY ON HIS WEDDING SPRITE, HER LOVE IS A VISIBLE MANIFESTATION ON HIS PERSON ALWAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 2. THE FACT THAT SHE ONLY ADMITS TO BEING THE HAPPIEST SHE CAN BE WHEN SHE SEES HIM SO HAPPY TOO. THIS IS SO MUCH. SO M U C H

And so Comte lifts her veil and kisses her gently uwu cover ur eyes chirren, the hall erupts in raucous applause and the crowd starts congratulating them!! Comte then encourages everyone to have fun, and the reception takes on the vibe of a kind of social gathering. MC notes that he seems to prefer this level of interaction, just relaxed and everyone chill, and she turns to tell him that it seems like it’ll be fun! Before she can finish her sentence, he kisses her fiercely before leaning back with a sigh, "It's still not enough, but I'll save the rest for later tonight." BITCH!!?!?!??!??!? HOW THE FUCK CAN ANYONE FOCUS ON A STUPID PARTY WHEN YOU SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT, HELLO???????MC notes: [Everyone from the mansion that saw the kiss made fun of me endlessly, and I hid my face in my bouquet] SAVE HER. Once again, it skips to the end of the reception and they’re now in Comte’s room. (I will blink twice if I think you need tissues BLINKS TWICE) 

Comte: "Yup, perfect." [He places the flower pins I gave him next to THE hourglass in the room, looking pleased HNGNNGNGNNGGNGN MY EYE HOLES ARE SUFFERING

MC: "I'm glad you liked the gift c:" 

Comte: "It is proof of your unchanging love, of course I cherish it :>"

She’s just so happy to see him so delighted with it. He asks how she liked the ceremony, and she gushes about how much she loved it. He hugs her (AWWWWWWWWWWWW) and then he notes that while it was fun to celebrate, all he wants now is time with his wife (AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA). He starts kissing her like the world is ending, and she says she needs to get changed--but he doesn’t care, says she’s fine as she is and that he wants her right now.

Aight usually I don’t get into epilogue territory, but honestly, this shit was JUST too good. Now this man made of magic asks MC if she’s wearing her bridal garter (you know, the one that usually comes with the whole bride ensemble in Western tradition). And she’s like ???? Uh, yeah, of course? Why... He says that he saw something interesting at a friend’s wedding reception once upon a time, and explains that the garter is usually removed and thrown to the bachelors (analogous to the bride’s throwing her bouquet, and whoever catches it will be the next to get married). PLEASE NOTE HE IS KISSING HER FOR LIKE 90% OF THIS IT’S AMAZING

MC: "So it's like the bouquet toss?" 

Comte: "Yes. Now then, how did he remove the garter...?”

HE DUCKS DOWN AND SHE’S LIKE COMTE!?!?

Comte: “...Ah yes, the groom removes it with his teeth >:D”

And so this man HAS THE TIME OF HIS LIFE tugging it down slowly under her dress, caressing her legs and loving every part of her. MC’s face is on fire, and she’s torn between being turned on and embarrassed. Eventually he reappears after teasing her MERCILESSLY and admits that he didn’t do it at the reception because he didn’t want anyone else to see her reaction. Blushing, shy, desirous--all of these feelings are his to keep and enjoy. (I!!!!! LOVE!!!!!!!!!! HOW SUBTLY POSSESSIVE HE IS AAAAAAAAAA) MC notes internally that she feels the same way about him, how he only shows this intensely passionate side to her. Comte is uncharacteristically impatient and frenzied that night, and they both go at it.

It skips to midnight where the two are cuddling in the aftermath, just being cute and happy. Comte, the absolute MADLAD is already thinking about how to celebrate next year--and she just giggles at him (he’s a wackadoo but he’s her wackadoo LMFAO MOOD) and he laughs with her. They essentially swear to promise their love over and over in the future, and it just ends on that wholesome note :>>>

Also can I just. The fact that he lived for so long alone, but was always, always paying attention to all of these little things that are done with a person’s loved one ;-; that he would remember his friend doing that at his wedding and be like BROOOOO I WANNA DO THAT IF I EVER GET MARRIED!!!!!!!!!!! I just. It’s so heartbreaking and touching at the same time, I just want to hold him forever ;-; the fact that he doesn’t seem to worry as much about his own happiness, seems absolutely floored that MC would do anything in return. I JUST LOVE HIM WITH EVERYTHING INSIDE OF ME 

THIS IS WHAT PEAK PERFORMANCE LOOKS LIKE

[anxiousfanchild]

Since people liked my Teruteru posts, I’m going to be listing every character in V1 and V2 and saying if they are overrated or underrated and why. WILL CONTAIN SPOILERS FOR BOTH GAMES/ANIME

V1:

Junko: overrated, obviously. She’s very pretty but other then that? Not the best lmao?? Abused and manipulated Mikan and Mukuro

Makoto: Boring, was carried through the whole game by kirigiri. Not even all that funny in the anime, he’s just a boring kid.

Togami: A spoiled rich boy that messed with poor Chihiro’s body. He’s cute but a total asshole and a twink (derogatory). He should have been a victim.

Toko: I love her personality and her design is very pretty, but the way they are further demonizing DID with her character is horrible and I do not stan. 

Leon: Underrated boy, everyone gives him a lot of shit for being the first murderer. He’s cute, he’s got a funky lil shirt (that he shares with nagito?) and hes got some scottish roots like me. A good boi (minus the fact he killed someone.) 

Maizono: Overrated, shes not even all that pretty. The REAL musical ultimate was Ibuki and you can’t convince me otherwise. 

Hifumi: He never did anything *wrong* in v1, but he gives off this horrible vibe. Probably has a body pillow of Kisa from Fruits Basket or smth gross like that. 

Kiyotaka: In the fandom, his personality has been muddled down to “old gay man” but lets be real, if this dude wasnt in a killing game, he’d be a c*p (o)

Aoi: Her personality is literally eating and big boobs and closed lesbian. Not a fleshed out character and honestly, Sakura should have survived, not her. 

Mondo: You’ve heard of mommy and daddy issues, now get ready for “I accidently killed my big brother when he gave me his biker gang when I was literally 15 years old and now I lay awake for nights thinking about and on top of that I might be gay and oh my god I just got turned into butter.” issues

Yasuhiro: 100% underrated. Is there colorism in the fact he’s one of the only dark skinned characters in this series and his personality is literally “spout off random bullshit and have the whole fandom think i’m a druggie?” yeah, but if i remember correctly, in the anime, he’s actually really smart or something? (in the second anime, not the first.) And he was really kind when he was taking care of Kiyotaka when Mondo died. He’s a good character, minus the obvious racial stereotypes

Sakura: Deserved to live. She was a great friend to Aoi and sacrificed herself so her friend could keep going. She’s a good gorl. 

Chihiro: Prefacing this with I’m a Chihiro Kinnie: overrated and everyone in the fandom sexualizes him. Or headcanons him as mtf or nonbinary. It literally explains why he dresses as a girl (he was v v weak and sickly so if he convinced everyone he was a girl, they wouldnt pick on him for being a weak boy). Headcanon what you want, but dont come at me with the “hE wAnTs To Be A GiRl” cause youre literally erasing his entired character and the REASON mondo was able to kill him. 

Celestia: She’s so creepy and mean? and not even in a cool way I just don’t like her. If Junko wasnt the mastermind behind this game, it totally would have been celestia. Manipulated Hifumi, framed Yasuhiro, and killed Hifumi and Kiyotaka. Not a fan with the double kill tbh

Kirigiri: I personally don’t like her cause she has no personality beyond “gotta solve this mystery like im fuckin scooby doo” and “I can’t believe its daddy issues!”

Mukuro: literally wants to fuck her sister. No. 

V2: (I’m not finished with it yet, just finished the Mikan trial) 

Teruteru: underrated and over villainized. he’s literally a horny teenager and was just trying to a) protect everyone from nagito cause he thought twogami was nagito and b) just wanted his mom. 

Nagito: literally insane lol. If I hear him say anything else about hope, I’m going to scream. 

Nekomaru: No personality minus “I need to take a shit”

Akane: (see Aoi) they are literally the same character

Ibuki: overrated, but I can see why. She was really nice and cool. (I also have an Ibuki interject in my system so I can’t really bad mouth her.)

Mikan: Annoying at most. If Junko didnt hurt her, she probably wouldnt have killed anyone. 

Chiaki: I get.... v bad vibes from her, but I also kin her so its an odd toss up

Hajime: Whole personality is “fuck off nagito” and “orange juice in a wine glass” 

Mahiru: No my favorite, I didnt really like her, but she was really nice to Hiyoko so she’s okay in my book. 

Hiyoko: Underrated because no one takes into consideration: she is litearlly like 16 or 17, shes under 5 feet tall, she’s never gone through a killing game before, shes probably terrified. Thats why she’s mean. And she’s not even mean to everyone, just to Mikan really (who didnt deserve if but she was a really easy target)

Fuyuhiko: boss baby, tiny boy, underrated. He lost his sister and his best friend, let him be. 

Peko: Eh?? if she didnt have a literal slave mentality she’d be cool (and i dont think it was hiko’s fault, cause there are many times where he was just trying to treat peko like a friend and she was in full human shield mode.) 

Gundham: nice design, but the theatrics are getting on my nerves. Whats with the hamsters? I like his scarf though

Kazuichi: literally a giant perv, but i like his design and I have a small soft spot for pervy characters. If he would have left Sonia alone, he would have been an okay character. 

Sonia: overrated, annoying, would fuck ted bundy and run a true crime blog on this gods damn website. Not a good girl and I’m surprised she hasnt killed kazuichi yet. 

I dont think I missed anyone so here you go. Read it and weep /j 

[janexeu]

     though the mist might prevent some from seeing it, JANE MÁRQUEZ is actually a descendent of HYPNOS. it’s still a question of whether or not the TWENTY-SIX year old DEMIGOD ELEMENTARY EDUCATION MAJOR from NEW ORLEANS, USA has taken after HER godly parent completely, but the demigod is still known to be quite SACRIFICIAL & STUBBORN.

( she’s b-b-b-back on her bs : katya ! tis uhm ,,,, a lil bit of a chonk of an intro but ill try 2 b cute w it. any time u wanna yeet jus peep the gif again & forgive me bc Look At Her ! )

POWERS ( more info here )

hypnokinesis  — p much made her a glorified babysitter w lynch-esque wacko dreams. it got stronger naturally as she got older, but jus w herself n eventually the ppl shes real close w. its also gotten a lot better since comin to eonia 

seeing gods in dreams  — she doesnt hang out w em every fridays at tgifs but like ,,, if she had Pertinent Questions she cud smhw make it happen. found out abt her being a demigod at age 10 when she met hypnos

memory retrieval — shes got great memry of her own but bc she knows it can help w grief n all that, shes been learnin in eonia how to do it 4 others if they mayb wanted it

BIO POINTS 

her single ma died during childbirth so jane's been in the foster care system since 5ever. attempts at reunification nvr worked out but thankfully she got real lucky w her group home and foster families. twas stable enough to not emotionally scar her even further but the instability of it all was fosho a big ol’ lot and has influenced her rigidness in sum aspects of her life

she lived p much as a mortal even tho her powers r a lil freaky. never went to camp but it worked out bc all her abilities r internal and cannot be Perceived by others. she had a talk w hypnos abt what 2 do n he mentioned camps but also gave sum monster avoidance tips ( like rarely use ur powers, maybe learn self defense, yada yada ) n she jus ,,, did that so she cud continue livin real normal w the mortals. logistics of camp stressed her out esp bc shes livin w non-family n stuff yk it was All Too Much, miss her w the added demigod stress tyvm

got married at 23 to her childhood sweetums luis, but he ,,, died abt a yr later fr a car accident. coma for 2 weeks n jane p much slept the entire time in his hospital room, visitin his dreams n talkin to him. twas a life support sitch so they eventually decided to pull da plug whch was real sad but like she's processed it 2 da best of her abilities. her powers helped a lot in the coping too n she visits memories of him in her dreams smtms when it gets real sad then shes ok again bc life goes on n life is pretty uwu

bc of her bg round kids of all kinds, shes always been passionate abt em. always takin babysittin/tutor gigs and went to community college so she cud teach n then worked as an elem teacher. only started considerin goin 2 eonia 4 postgrad when she had a student who showed signs n strugglez of bein a demigod. she eventually got to talk to their godly parent 2 confirm n she was shocked pikachu meme, real concerned for all those youngins who hav no clue what to do ! or how to cope ! bc they cant facetime w the olympians lyk she can ! so cue her discussin eonia w luis a lot then a year after the accident, broke out the pro-con list again. took abt *checks watch* another yr til she finally decided to zoom 2 athens but then whoosh she did !

PERSONALITY

yearning ? idk her — shes can be a bit of a take it as is typa chick. can be a lil literal jsksj not dumb but like ,,, def doesnt read into things enuff to pine n long n year yk. some things might def fly over her head. she says Yes To Serotonin in this house. she dk the the mitskis n the sikens n the carsons ; its all mary oliver up in this joint. we just tryna luv life n be grateful folkz

le freak, say chic ! — control freak, that is. growin up in an unstable envi meant shed cling 2 stability n independence, wrvr she cud get it. so when it comes 2 the way she does things, she can be real a heel digger. also bc she has 2 deal w kids yk so it can b A Lot n shes v stern lyk dat. ofc she wont infantilize the eonians .,,,. or will she ? big sis vibes outta control. she means well tho always always means well. itll also b v hard to get her 2 giv up on sum1 bc life ? she luvs it n knows u can too

changes by david bowie — is decidedly skipped on the playlist. she doesnt like change !!! i mean she knows its inevitable but still not entire unavoidable. ever since she got out of the system, shes had a partner n her own way of doing things n its been workin out so why change it yk ? she says time may change me but jokes on u i can sorta trace time 

rip but im different — this goes out to all em whores in this house. she respectz ur hustle but like ,,,, not her thang. girl doesnt even get drunk when she drinks bc she doesnt rlly drink sksjsk doesnt like the taste of it, big baby ! but like she's Lived, its more like. ok tried it, not for me. thanks tho. also for all the meanies in the house, y’all perplex her. shes empathetic n wont show the judgement but smtms shes lowkey lyk .,., ur how old n u had all this goin 4 u n ur still so rotten ? how u actin like a 7yo w a trantrum ? scratch head, make it make sense

at least u tried — dad jokes, bad puns, tries to be big jokester but isn't funny. she's pretty tho so she gets away with it. idk wht else 2 say ur honor. shes the type thatll embarrass u w affection

well that was Awkward — probably sum1 abt her if  they see her actin a Fool bc shes in a foreign sitch or topic. when shes a fish outta water then she can be so ! easily ! flustered ! which is p much her in eonia. shes not new new but theres way 2 much godly shennanigans for her to wrap her head ‘round n sis has never gone to camp so its ice bucket challenge level shock from time to time still w da magics n lore

til death do us part — yknow when death cab for cutie said i knew that u wer a truth i wud rather lose than 2 hav nvr lain beside at all ? how abt when they wrecked me by rudely sayin love is watching sum1 die ? yes ? no ? nywy thats jane 4 ya. if she loves then shes in and if shes in then she is all in, luke danes stylez

was that a vivid enough picture or did i just word vom the same things agen n agen sjksjs jus know shes cute n sweet if a lil frustrating n annoying bc shes stubbornpants mcgee. may or may not have a slight compulsion to help fix other ppl ..,,.. someone set her str8 n tell her fix u by coldplay isnt it !!!  

OTHER INFO 

5′9″ born 4 october 1994, virgo sun n moon

not a freshie ! idk how long her program is but like ,,, lets ignore that 4 now ok jus kno that she been here a while

yogi & boxing enthusiast back at home. hc her mans got real into the martial arts w her when hypnos told her she gotta learn how 2 defend so that was one of their things : bonding by workouts so jane cud protecc herself if need be

her maiden name’s jane fulton. got her mommas surname but the name jane ? thats some jane doe bs some rando picked out for her which she hated at first but then seeing tarzan made her go hmmm, ok bet !

lgbtq+ alliance president ! identifies as pan

she met her late hubbie when they were abt 7ish, real friends 2 lovers cuteness. jane was there for him throughout his entire coming out & transition ergo her passion for the community esp queer kids bc she was That Cis Ally for her mans. wears her ring as a real lowkey necklace now

shes also real passionate abt sleep. will ask u how did u sleep last night p much every day u see her bc ppl spend like half their lives asleep catherine ofc shes gonna ask

her fave thing abt eonia ?  the whole siblings bit. shes had 2 make do w what she got n build a family from scratch so this ? she luvs it a lot let her give u kithes hypnos babies

shes p well versed in the greek thingies but only thru the knowledge mortals gets + dream info. after her realizin who she is, all things ancient greek jus sorta became her niche interest ykwim ? shes not like Super Learned abt it more like ,,, ok i gotta at least make Sum sense outta all this, gotta learn what i can. imagin how embarrassin it wud b 2 see a god in ur dream n then go : sorry to this man. nope. not jane, not her, nuh-uh 

luv languages : words, acts of service, physical touch !

useless hcs but she loves disney sfm ok. smtms dresses up as princess tiana for bday parties n shit bc shell do nythin 2 put a smile on the kids n babs faces

ya like jazz ? bc jane surely does ! adores motown & 60s music. nina simone owns her. no one drag peggy lee from 101 dalmatians ! not an important hc but i jus wanted to quote my bubble butt winged bee lover barry

POSSIBLE CONNECTIONS

children ! infants ! babies !

demigods that make her scratch head damn u live like this ? but also wud knife emoji to protect n care for. shes not the oldest on campus but shes been livin independently p much her entire life so she finks shes got a tight grasp on the myth that is Adulting  

srsly tho the Big Sis vibes is off the charts w this one. shell perserve u dumdums

baddie influencies !

convince her 2 get drunk at a party ! bc she never does. convince her to maybe try drugs ! or go hook up ! do smths impulsive idk jus smth new !

gl tho bc shes not rlly ,,, easily influenced But she can b reasoned w ! in general i fink its just gonna be a fun dynamic if y/m knows how to coax sum wildness outta her or w/e bc thotty yummy theyre hotty yolo rzning jus wont do w this gal. will most likely get argumentative like a big ol momma hen but if u win then ur winning big

Sleep Now or forever hold ur peace !

idk sum1 she helps w their messy sleep ? shes def not super public w it, surely knows her other siblings r Better at it but if  y’all are close, she probs enjoys doin it 4 ya. she runs her hair thru fingers a lot when she does it. like a lot a lot unless u tell her to get lost

lover boi, lover gorl, lover enby !

she can be a lil traditional when it comes to how she views rels. she wants all that meetcute courting bs ! no gender roles tho n u best be sure shes not constantly comparin w her late hubbie ,,, but she jus wants smth magical n 2 be wooed again yk ?

so yea ,,, crushers mayhaps ? sum1 who is tryin 2 woo her ? sum1 she had a meetcute w and now janes got lowkey heart eyes for em ? idk lotsa possiblities but pls keep in mind she is not good at the flirtings so hav mercy on her 

eonia tour guide !

or jus friends who like ,,, constnatly fill her in w all the godly stuff n whatnot. years of not goin 2 camps mean u miss out on a lot ! explore ruins w her n get her info her mortal educ didnt make her privy 2 yk 

head real empty atm i will think of sum n let y’all know when i do, but give us all the conekshunz. friends, enemies, the usual bit, lgbtq alliance peeps, lmk whats up whats done whats cookin we want it all

( shes p much a new muse n da result of me tryna bring in an emotionally healthy kid to this sad sad university. janes in a v good well-adjusted place rn n is my therapy muse bc that other bitch m** is a messy handful. but wbk life aint linear so mayhaps shit’ll hit da fan or one of y/m will ruin her lmfao press f pls ! but also color me eyes emoji bc we love to see it )

[dk-s]

hello ! don't worry about taking time to reply :) i take a long time too & i understand that you have life stuff goin on!! & yeah!! i love looking forward to your letters 🥰🥰🥰

kajsksjs thank u 🥺 i hope so too!! i really miss track 😔 we had cross country in the fall but it's not as fun sigh.. and yeah :(( our winter breaks are so short right when i get used to it, we have to go back to school :( even last weekend, we had a long weekend and it was great but now we have another full week and i'm not feeling it.. it might also be senioritis oops

and yes exactly!! i feel like in school all we ever learn is like .. the "americanized" version of history which always leaves out other perspectives, so it's fun to see all of the stuff that we miss out on learning in school .. and yeah!! i'm really into politics lsjdks maybe it's bc of the lack of representation or bc of the fact that our govt is Not It but!!

ahh yeah!! there's a lot of different fields that are super interesting & fun w loads of stuff u can do w it so!! i'm sure u'll find something that fits you!

LEFT AND RIGHT!!! what a bop svt has: no bad songs!!

I PICKED IT UP YESTERDAY!! i haven't gotten to read it yet bc i've had work :( but i think i'll be able to start by the end of this week and i'm so excited !!

tbh idk what rotational kinematics either . i thought i was gonna be good at it bc i was good at regular kinematics but i was proven to be completely wrong . i would offer to help you but i'm honestly useless once u get past regular kinematics and forces and energy 😔 but good luck!! physics isn't too too bad as long as you understand the concepts bc the math parts end up being fairly easy :)

I KNOW 🥺🥺 i love feeling like a princess that spends my days reading books in a cozy lil cabin, baking bread & braiding my hair & flowy, long dresses give me that vibe for some reason. very sad how it's all cold here now so now i can't wear them :(

ah yes!! shua, chan, joon the holy trinity of govt officials. have a wonderful day/evening!! and you too!! stay hydrated and eat all of the yummy foods!! sleep well & stay well rested! <33 (and enjoy your last few days of school / first few days of summer!) ~age twin anon

hoping your surgery goes well & that you feel well soon!!! sending you all of the love & hugs sunshine!! 💖 ~age twin anon

bro!!! thank u!!! thats so kind n im sending hugs and sunshine back!!!! i love u and ur letters sm!!!

cross country sounds so painful to me because like hello?! this is not lord of the rings we are not being chased why would u make me run that far for so long? but some ppl are genuinely so good at it n have a lot of endurance so i really admire that!!! and like ugh i feel u bro going back to school is hard esp when u relax so much!!

i got like eight weeks of holidays now n i know its gonna kill my routine so i got to stay focused so i can go into y12 ready ahaha!!! and yea! the western version of history is often so biased and ofc w the white saviour complex its really easy to lose ur own culture n history :(

wbk tho seventeen has zero bad songs in their discography they are kings!!! and yes!! tell me what u think bout the silm <3 if u got any book recs for me lmk 🥺

and yea! thats smth i noticed w physics!! with some sciences such as human biology u need to memorise the topics entirely but w physics i think it is more of the understanding of the concept and how it can be applies to variety of things in our world!!! so i really wanna improve in it!!!

and oh to be a lady living in soft silken dresses n tying my hair with a ribbon while hiking my skirt up as i place a plate of freshly baked bread on the table in the spring with a pot of fresh jam made from strawberries i picked from my small garden that u can see from the kitchen window!!!

i would honestly vote namjoon to be president of the entire world because his brain is very galaxy sized and the joonman is a king!! him or seungcheol <3

anyway i hope u have an amazing day!!! ily!!!! 💓

[syncogon]

sad only 480p version this time, and delayed. oh well, temptation too strong, and clips on the weibo looked promising, so let’s go

mjy sighhh i guess he’s just dumb not malicious but man

“the truth isn’t important” glasses shing. oh wow that hair swish tho that was like unnecessarily well animated hahaha

iiiii just want jhx to tell off yy!! i think that’d be great, what a faceslap! also wtf is this thing? iron supplements?? a spray? icy-hot? 铁打损伤喷雾?? god i spent like five minutes trying to mouse-trace those characters and i still don’t know if this is supposed to be significant or if it’s just significant that jhx caught yy doing shady shit 

anyway given music / context it seems jhx is annoyed at what yy is doing? so yay friggin finally. “our classes aren’t at nanhua” nice 

“xu-da” vs “xu-ge” hmm. anyway jhx don’t fall for the lies. jhx is like sx, annoying and chuuni but probably isn’t as obnoxiously awful as he first appears... probably.... maybe. 

goddd sucks that the full version of this op is kinda weird, because i LOVE this op so much like holy crap. jiyi bei yingfu huanxing.... 

man now im like stressed about the yf at the airport scene. trailer showed an airport. what’s gonna happennn

this exchange about dd feels so weird like it sounds like ctg is trying to explain they’re not in any pre-relationship or smth but maggie is like “i don’t mind” in a way that makes it sound like she wouldn’t mind if they’re together? what??? but whatever

ok i really enjoy this cr/yf dynamic. like i feel like it’s a bit ooc and yf as portrayed here is maybe too far on the acquiescence but also it’s really funny and sparks joy for me so i’ll buy it. i’m happy to see like established relationship stuff i think bc i generally don’t in the stuff i watch. speaking of which i’m super glad that they didn’t make the awful dumb move of trying to insert like Another wack love triangle drama dynamic thing in this like the fans want yecong and tianmai!!

wowwww it’s so nice how supportive cr is being tho like i love to see it!

handholding!! soft!! nice inversion of the earlier part where cr is bandaging his fingers. but like -

WHY DOES SHE HAVE MARKS/CALLUSES ON HER THUMB AND NOT HER PINKY??? like ok i have not played ukelele but i sure have my own share of stringed instrument finger calluses and you don’t?? press on the string with your thumb???

still, they’re trying, it’s a cute detail, i appreciate it. i liked that one wwgk review i watched yesterday that pointed out s1 was like a coming of age story disguised as a music story, whereas s2 is like a real music story.... 

wait this is incredibly cute wtf. oh my god. 

YF SIGHED/FACEPALMED AT THAT? COME ON!! WTF THAT’S SO RUDE? THAT WAS ACTUALLY LIKE PRETTY GOOD?? AND SHE DID THIS JUST FOR YOU? like maybe not performance ready but bro she’s learned for two days!! also holy shit the strumming animation is really good for smth like this im impressed! that reminds me of the like actually legit violin animation they showed in the trailer yo im so ready 

like i totally understand the frustration (damn, maggie’s face... 3 free performances? really?) but also i feel SO BAD FOR CR HERE this is so awkward oh my godddd at least ctg like tries to apologize to her (and cr’s reaction to this whole thing is also v solid, good for her) but still like damn 

aww ahh man im glad maggie still like! supports encourages cr here! that’s also char dev being able to like get past her own complicated emotions at least for this sort of gesture 

awwww i also like seeing maggie’s coping, the happiness philosophy i always thought that was super interesting. she’s a great char! and i think running is good

animators animate a girl running normally challenge

oh nice you have to walk a bit after sprinting, good

the train track scenes are so pretty wahhh 

does... does the track just end there? what

the ~significance~ of maggie now sharing this piece of her that used to be a yf thing, with ctg 

also excellent bgm - oh omg it’s og soul link remix!!! 

“i don’t want you to go” 

MY GOD HE’S FINALLY MAKING A REAL MOVE. and one based in real friendship. GOD FUCKING FINALLY CTG AAAAAA she’s cryyying man this exchange is also pretty cute ngl 

i can’t believe they figured this out a full 4 episodes before the finale 

this is so pretty here wahhhhhh i wanna ss the whole thing in 1080p 

awhhhhhh

they never released pink twilight shanghai!! i want this ver!!! 

aww yayyy open still cheering her on - YF BE NICE TO YOUR GF COME ON

haha this is like reverse of cr tutoring him - WAIT YEAH YF YOU WERE A SHITTY ASS STUDENT COMPARED TO HER BE EXTRA NICE 

also remixed dream i dig it! sounds like new lyrics? 

julliard hahahaha

dong dong goddess

HAHAHA did dd just steal ctg’s fries

ctg: expressing some deep thoughts

me: just watching dd

“forever confident, forever happy” 

wait sooooooo are they a thing now or what did that count as a confession

“and qing’er is finally here” WHAT’S THE TEAAAAA WE STILL DON’T REALLY KNOW

“im a guitarist this is fine” YOU GO DD I LOVE YOU 

BEACH EPISODE BEACH EPISODE BEACH EPISODE 

omg oyzq. you’d think they were trying to extort a confession from him. what the hell is this instrument he said what is a xiao 箫. A WOODEN FLUTE? YOOO THAT’S COOL my god PLEASE let us get some kickass trad/modern fusion music im so ready 

“i trust ouyang” ahhh double char surnames are cool

HAHAHAHAHHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA WHAT THE FUCK

“because i’m about to have surgery on my knee” REALLY? REALLY? IS THIS REALLY HOW YOU’RE GOING TO JUSTIFY ALL THIS? FOLKS I AM LOSING MY SHIT I HAVEN’T LAUGHED OUT LOUD LIKE THIS IN SO LONG

ok this is interesting tho he’s not a dick for the hell of it it’s out of desperation or smth. but like half a year, oh no, what a horror. (i’m fresh out of hb feels ok you shaddap // tho i can also imagine the knife, like in lotus bloom, where they didn’t think szp’s injury was permanent). tho i do also like the “then we’ll be seniors we won’t have time to perform” but also that’s just a reminder that all of these ppl are like frigging 16 year olds and i still cannot take this seriously

i like “i didn’t expect, that i couldn’t give you the confidence to win”. god im so glad this confrontation is happening. man this feels like a wrap up already are they really spending all 3 last episodes on the competition? what’s the story gonna be? 

feel like he’d be less ugly with hairstyle that looked more consistently like this. anyway sucks that both of them are so ugly otherwise there’s some nice sun/moon (+stars?) imagery you can get going here

GROUP CHAT GROUP CHAT GROUP CHAT 

pretty! i wanna save this hq

it’s this bgm!!! godd i just want this track so bad

an empty beach?? in china near shanghai??? 

anyway ahhh it’s the iconic beach shot! i like how the promo ver cuts out dd lmfao

wow nine episodes in and cookie finally gets a character moment??? cookieeeeeeee i missed you

ok i can’t ship them he calls her shifu but also THIS IS SUCH A CUTE FRIENDSHIP calling every day 10 minutes?? wow!! i love dongdong and i love cookie. also this hits different in covid times “no one says that we can’t be friends because of distance” 

oh i guess they are pushing this as a ship. meh.

wahhhhh. need this hq then i have more propic material. 

HE HAS COVID 

ah lang is VIBING oh to be the ah lang of my own life. parasurfing. walking into poles. 

wow this is so modern! the red bag thing! wow i do love this show flexing the modern-ness 

this is the mercedes benz arena im SURE of it ahhhh holy crap this crowd. oh to be in a crowd without mask

IT’S THIS DUDE AGAIN like the trailer spoiled this but if i found out this right here right now i would’ve lost my shit my god hahhaah

im like torn about how i feel about cr’s dress like idk if it fits her well even if it’s pretty

:<

oh im scared i hope this doesn’t become embarrassing 

:0

OMG THEY INCLUDED PENCIL SKETCH OF THAT S1 SCENE. HAHAHA. char growth yayyyyy

ok anyway im happy!! spent like an hour watching this or something lmao but good times!! much better than last ep HAHA yayyy im so glad we’re finally at the comp and lots of these little things have been tied up now im ready for new song drops!!!

[fmdjaewonarchive]

ayo waddup, it’s ur local inactive bitch jamie, while technically still on hiatus and i probably won’t get any actual writing done till i get off that (on tuesday, not that long anyway) i would love to get some plots in already cuz i’m v excited!!! imma leave some plot ideas under the cut but tbh im basically down for anything, if u wanna plot just like this post, slide into my ims or hmu on d*s*c*rd: spare serotonin pls🖤#5703 .

jaewon: 

alcohol tw// listen, this is a one time only thing but basically, i lowkey want jaewon to get pretty drunk for once??? for anyone that doesn’t know, jaewon hardly ever drinks at industry events, gotta be the composed leader and all of that but between champion, filming a new drama, two unity albums, and our songs, he’s super stressed out and he’s like fuck it for once and ends up drinking more than anticipated. tbh this isn’t even rlly one plot either, i’d love all types of drunk jaewon interactions, someone enable him, someone be worried about him cuz this is unlike him, someone have a drunk heart-to-heart with him (jaewon can only talk ab his feelings when he’s drunk cuz he’s sexy like that), someone drag him into their stupid antics, someone get into an argument with him, the possibilities are endless.

also i haven’t settled on what any of my muses will be wearing but jaewon isn’t a dress up kinda guy so it will be super bare minimum, just a suit with the vaguest hint of smth fairytale/halloween related, someone call him out for being no fun or comment on it or something yeah.

jaewon isn’t a social settings kinda guy, and esp w the heavy drinking he’ll b doing througout the night, he’ll probably need a break from the crowdedness of the ballroom a few times, ur likely to find jaewon outside for a breather so any threads taking place like that are most definitely valid too.

yuanjun:

god yuanjun loves costume parties so much, i’m not 100% sure what im aiming for here but expect something peter pan/tinkerbell inspired. whatever it will be he’s definitely aiming to be one of the best dressed at the party. pls let him interact w people who are just as extra ab the whole dress up thing as he is, he just wants to marvel over pretty suits and dresses.

yuanjun is a Presence by himself you know, i’d love to have someone trying to look after him cuz they assume he’s drunk or smth but in reality he has had like, two glasses of champagne and his personality is just like this 

also a v random silly thing but id love love love loveeeee if there was like a muse touching up their make-up and yuanjun came across them and he offered to help them with it and they’re surprised to see how good he’s at it? pls i just need smth like this so bad it’d be so cute

also you BET yuanjun is gonna watch scary movies when given the chance so uh, either a fellow scary movie buff or just a poor victim he drags along (bonus points if they’re afraid of horror and now they’re stuck w yuanjun who keeps trying to scare them during the movie

yena: 

alcohol tw // you just know yena is gonna show up already some degree of drunk from the moment she arrives and honestly she’s only gonna get progressively worse through the night.

she’s also aiming to be the hottest bitch at the party. im kidding. kinda. but she’s either gonna be a hot cruella de vil or a hot ursula cuz yena is mean and sexy and that’s kinda iconic of her, love that about her. this is hardly a plot idea but it just had to be said tbh.

my point being yena is gonna be sexy and drunk (a normal saturday evening for her) and it’d be a shame if someone didn’t make out with her somewhere in secret, it’s what she deserves truly.

smoking tw // also yena is a notorious party smoker i’m just saying, secret smokers party in the hedge maze.

generally i’m down for any messy plots people might have, yena bumping into someone, spilling a drink over them, accidentally stepping on someone’s costume and tearing it, literally ANYTHING yena is here to cause problems and cause problems only.

but also you KNOW she will be throwing it back on the dance floor, also photo booth queen, what’s the point of the party if she doesn’t have pictures of how fine she looked.

minah:

again, idk where im gonna go w her dress but it will probs be smth pretty princess inspired or smth. idk man. again, not a plot point, just wanted to have said it

minah is ur local mom friends here for all ur needs. need someone to hold your hair? help you fix your costume? tell you to drink water? miss minah is HERE and she will mom everyone whether they asked for it or not.

i think minah is the most likely of my idiots to partake in the scavenger hunt so like if anyone wanted to do some threads around that, that’d b pretty cute

alcohol tw // minah doesn’t really care for drinking at events like this, anyone who can be bothered is free to try to convince her to loosen up

out of all my muses, minah is probably the only one to do normal people things, you know, that don’t involve being fuck drunk (jaewon nd yena) or being annoying as shit (yuanjun) so all kinds of shit like going on a walk in the flower garden/maze, enjoy a movie like normal people, talk ab people’s outfits etc. etc. 

minah is the boring one okay

[transrightsjimin]

man, watching / listening to videos in which lolitas talk about how great the community is and whenever they say smth like ‘there will always be assholes‘ they refer to ppl outside the community nd claim that bad ppl will be corrected anyway and im just. lmao, no i dont think so bc we’ve had a bunch of openly fascist members for years now and shit like ppl bullying a trans girl (who is now still on the list of banned people) and a disabled girl out of the community so no i dont think this can be repaired. i also just struggle in general w this supposed sense to ‘belonging’ to a community or feeling at home in it, like, with other lgbt and leftist army i do feel a lot more comfortable and ‘at home’ if you will, but the lolita community and other communities that are just based on 1 interest of mine are not a guarantee at all to having similar personalities, politics, feeling safe or being able to make friendships. ive been wearing lolita since 2013 and some years i went to more meetups / events than in other years, nd while they could be fun, ive never truly been able to build up a friendship within it. i did meet up w another army in the comm to go see a bts documentary in cinemas once, which was fun, but she was also kind of mean to others on purpose nd it was a bit uncomfortable. i did tell a few people in the lolita community that im nonbinary but most of the ones i told kept forgetting abt it (just like my parents i guess) and calling me a girl nd one person studied psychology and somehow thought that was a good reason to keep telling me transphobic things she’d learned in uni (such as that many people change their mind and detransition) nd then was all ‘sorry did i say smth wrong?‘ when i was visibly uncomfortable.

but just in general i dont feel comfortable w the community and it sucks that theres only one of it bc the netherlands is small. the pandemic nd thus the lack of IRL egl events has made me realize more and more that there’s like. truly very few reasons for me to seek out this shitfest of a community bc i don’t feel comfortable when i dont have friends in it, i truly have nothing in common with the rest aside from liking frilly clothing, and there’s neo-nazis in it that are just allowed to do whatever (and one even dressed in the infamous nazi-inspired set by Metamorphose, which even the brand itself apologized for). the only reason i feel like i need to do something with lolitas from my country is bc ppl say it’s supposedly super fun and all but idk. i think i did have a lot of fun once at a halloween-themed lolita event like, 7 years ago, and at under the sea, this j-fashion event from 4 years ago. it might also be bc i mainly remember bad stuff due to depression but i rly just... i dont feel comfortable, ive already blocked those 3 fascists plus another person in the comm who loves the dutch military, a lot of ppl in the comm unfollowed me once i started to share more leftist stuff on facebook, and one of them who at once was sort of a friend now has me blocked in sta and idek why bc we never had an argument or anything. i might miss the bigger events but honestly, the ones i attended in the past 3,5 years have been shit so im not really missing much anyway.

[jsteneil]

Neil Josten’s Birthday Bash

in which the foxes don’t get anything done, ever

 *

Nicky added Dan, Kevin, Aaron and three others to “Neil Josten's Birthday Bash Organization Committee”.

Nicky: can't add Andrew because he still owns a FLIP PHONE but here we go

Dan: hell yeah B-)

Nicky: kevin can fill him in with the details anyway

Kevin: why me?

Allison: because you live with him?

Matt: you're practically attached at the hip

Dan: omg ur roomm8s

Matt: ^^^ what allison said

Dan: yeah

Nicky: OR aaron can do it on wednesdays so that there's no chance of neil finding out :D

Aaron: no.

Aaron left the chat.

Nicky: what

Nicky: the

Kevin: just add him back

Nicky: fuck

Kevin: ffs

Kevin: some ppl are in class

Nicky added Aaron to the chat.

Aaron: im muting you all

Allison: just embrace the fact that you've lived in SC for years and say y'all

Nicky: y'all!!!

Nicky: yeah

Matt: dude don't how are u gonna know when to buy your coordinated outfit and rehearse the choreography if you mute us

Dan: Aaron?

Renee: I do think he muted us

Allison: fuck a crybaby

Nicky: hey

Allison: what's he gonna do? Unmute us?

Dan: asdhskfjdl ALLI

Matt: lmfao

Nicky: moving ON

Nicky: the important thing here is my boy neil's birthday

Kevin: and you wonder why Aaron left

Nicky: what?

Kevin: maybe Neil doesn't want to celebrate his bday

Nicky: no that's too sad

Nicky: next person?

Allison: not to be that bitch

Matt: oh?

Allison: but do we even know when his birthday is?

Allison: fuck you matthew donovan boyd

Matt: sorry i love you

Dan: it was easy

Dan: matt ur easy

Matt: ily babe

Dan: <3

Kevin: jan 19th

Renee: March 31st?

Allison: wait

Dan: uhhhh

Matt: Neil Josten deserves 2 bdayz

Kevin: no jan 19th

Renee: oh i thought we were using the one he chose for himself

Matt: Renee add a smiley face

Renee: :)

Renee: ?

Dan: babe ur mind,,,, im crying

Matt: ikr

Allison: stop using mygf so

Kevin: is it me or does it sound really passive aggressive bitchy with a smiley face

Dan: ye that's the point

Renee: I really wasn't trying to be

Matt: oh no we know, sorry

Matt: i feel bad now

Matt: it was just funny

Matt: sorry

Dan: :(

Renee: It's okay, don’t worry

Renee: :)

Dan: renee STOP i feel like ur going 2 murder me in my sleep

Renee: I could, but I won't

Nicky: im shaking and im not even in your dorm

Allison: and we daily thank god for that

Nicky: hey im an excellent roommate

Nicky: i always leave so cap and matt can have sexy times

Dan: yeah but then u call it sexy time

Allison: ive seen the bathroom nicky

Nicky: that's aaron

Matt: l o l

Kevin: aaron's a neat freak

Allison: exposed

Nicky: erik come get me the people here are mean

Renee: So when's Neil's actual birthday?

Kevin: jan 19th

Nicky: who's gonna ask andrew?

Kevin: HE HAS REAL PAPERS NOW

Kevin: JUST GO CHECK AND LET ME BE IN CLASS IN PEACE

Allison: well okay drama queen

Dan: kevin: *is on the chat as much as us*

Dan: also kevin: guys why r u dragging me here

Matt: it's okay kevin we can talk about it during practice

Renee: Don't goad him, Matt

Dan: lmfao babe u thought

Matt: uh oh

Allison: lol

Dan: we need 2 trounce the ravens nxt wk

Nicky: do we have to

Dan: y'all r hauling ass @ practice or god help me

Nicky: id settle for a close victory

Matt: nicky if you don't help us close the goal next friday im telling neil about his surprise

Nicky: noooooo :'(

Allison: ye renee has enough to do without having to face stuff y'all should have blocked

Renee: Andrew is also a goalkeeper

Allison: yeah but he doesn't give a fuck

Renee: That's neither true nor fair

Dan: i want bragging rights over this vctry, end of the question

Matt: are we just gonna ignore the fact that the fbi chose neil's old bday

Matt: even tho they made him a new identity

Allison: wonder how this conversation went

Nicky: are we ignoring the fact that neil is a goddamn CAPRICORN

Allison: "in my left hand is your birthday date. In my right hand is your other birthday" *shuffles behind his back*

Matt: idk about astrology but I checked and he tried to pass for an aries so what does that tell us?

Dan: shut up adfhskdjs

Nicky: im dying

Kevin: [attached picture]

Matt: did u steal neil's ID

Allison: i thought you were in class

Kevin: he sent it to me

Nicky: his phone can take pics??

Dan: RLY crappy 1s but yeah

Nicky: so all those times andrew refused to send me pics of his Eden’s Twilight's outfits so i could coordinate neil's…

Matt: :/

Kevin: he just doesn't like you

Allison: i would have laughed but you two have been fighting the good fight since last year, dressing neil up

Nicky: hey

Renee: Kevin, that was mean

Nicky: but thanx allison, I think so too

Kevin: sorry

Kevin: he's just difficult?

Nicky: yeah :(

Dan: omg u guys rmr when neil was on k ferdinand's show n he looked like a bite-sized snack in that shirt

Kevin: not exactly what I remember from this interview

Dan: u were pretty 2 <3

Kevin: oh my god

Renee: Didn't Neil keep the clothes?

Nicky: i've never seen him wear them again

Nicky: maybe he STUFFED THEM DOWN THE TOILET

Matt: uh okay

Allison: weird emphasis

Kevin: are you still stuck on that

Dan: what

Kevin: it's what happened with the clothes he wore the first time we went to columbia

Nicky: do you know how expensive that plumber was?

Matt: just a thought but maybe that wouldn't have happened if you didn't force him to come with you and drugged him against his will

Allison: don't tell me someone actually peed on them and tried to flush

Nicky: take it up with andrew

Matt: you literally drove the car

Kevin: what happened in columbia stays in columbia

Allison: omg oh my god

Dan: IM SCREAMING

Nicky: what was i supposed to do, get knifed?

Nicky: also ^^^^ yeah.

Nicky: ANYWAY

Nicky: now that Kevin got us proof that the FBI officially made neil a capricorn again,,

Dan: the fbi be like "oh u thought u could escape ur traumatic past? That's nice buddy

Matt: yeah I don't think beating last year's party is gonna be hard

Dan: here's ur bday n trauma back"

Nicky: HAPPY THOUGHTS

Nicky: :(

Nicky: anyway it's the big 21st, so the first thing in order is BOOZE

Kevin: uh nicky

Renee: He's turning 20?

Matt: what???

Kevin: yeah he aged himself up on his fake papers

Matt: oh my god

Dan: lmfao only neil

Nicky: he is baby

Matt: does. Does he know though. Like did he check when they made him the papers.

Kevin: I'm guessing so

Matt: imagine filling a form or smth and you get the day right but not the year

Renee: Wait Kevin, how did you get neil to send you the pic without telling him about the surprise party?

Nicky: DON'T YOU DARE HAVE TOLD HIM ABOUT THE NJBB

Allison: njbb?

Dan: neil josten's bday bash, im guessing

Nicky: Neil Josten's

Nicky: BIRTHDAY BASH

Nicky: yes

Allison: it doesn’t sound right

Allison: like, something’s missing in the name

Matt: alli we play a sport named after what you get when you take the s from sexy

Dan: 10 bux kevin wishes he didn't have such a stick up his butt so he could reply with exy is sexy

Allison: im not taking that

Kevin: i actually don't know why she named it that

Kevin: she never told the press and she didn't write it anywhere so

Nicky: :(

Allison: oh

Dan: sorry :(

Renee: Maybe coach knows?

Matt: maybe each letter has a meaning

Kevin: how?

Allison: endangering xylophones yearly?

Matt: EXceptional daY

Matt: and then, boom, it's about your name

Renee: Matt, I like that idea!

Dan: allison, no

Kevin: I'll have to ask coach, renee

Kevin: anyway it was always going to be her name, she invented it

Nicky: someone bring neil in so he can say something super serious about how kevin is a legendary striker whose name is already associated with exy and make us choke with emotion

Kevin: nicky….

Nicky: look it's working and he's not even there

Allison: it's the josten effect

Dan: changing your entire life's beliefs one extremely tragic remark at a time

Matt:...

Matt: someone change the subject im sad

Nicky: BIRTHDAY BASH

Kevin: oh yeah nicky asked me how i got neil's ID

Allison: and?

Kevin: i told him i signed him up for his own exynews account so he could stop hogging mine for streaming

Kevin: so i needed his name and birthday

Kevin: and then we got into an argument about date formats

Nicky: dd/mm/yy 4ever

Allison: eww

Kevin: so he sent me a pic instead of writing the date

Dan: it's the european propaganda getting to him

Kevin: i guess i really have to get him an account now

Dan: kevin i know you're entirely serious but that's so funny

Nicky: THE REST OF THE WORLD USES IT

Matt: admit it, you can't wait to go back to Germany because you secretly like the metric system

Nicky: yeah dicks sound bigger if you use centimeters

Dan: didn't need 2 know that

Nicky: not that erik needs that :)

Dan: I DON'T WANNA KNOW

Renee: ….

Matt: honestly im glad i don't understand german or i would never live down all the skyping

Dan: renee's like "can't relate" lmfao

Renee: No indeed

Allison: hell yeah that's my girlfriend

Renee: <3

Allison: hey minyard if you're secretly lurking now is the time to leave

Allison: …

Renee: No, he truly muted us earlier

Dan: are we surprised?

Renee: we'll catch him up on what we decide to do later

Renee: Nicky?

Nicky: oh, yeah!!!

Nicky: BIRTHDAY BASH

Matt: here we go again

Dan: mamma mia

[disloopy]

remedy for a broken heart pt.2

nafla

genre: angst

word count: 3k

a/n. i’m sorry this look on nafla is superior don’t try to convince me otherwise. this part is soooo long im sorry but i hope its a good finish since you guys have been waiting forever for it.

                                 with a little bit of this, with a little bit of that we gon be alright

Nicholas sighed in exhaustion, plopping down on the couch next to you. The current state of the small studio he shared with the rest of the boys reflected upon the amount of time he spent there, working on songs but never finding one that seemed to qualify his ideals.

“What are the stakes?”

“Hm?”

“I mean if I quite music... can I live?”

You turned to him, setting your phone aside. “Ask yourself... you’re the one who said music is your life.”

“I know... but I’m afraid people here won’t accept me cause I’m not one of their own.”

You laughed. “Babe, it’s always hard at first, I’m sure they’ll eventually learn how amazing you are and will look past the differences.”

“You know,” Nicholas murmured. “Jinyoung hyung suggested we go to Korea for a a while.” He knew he had peaked your interest with those words. “He knows some people there. If we can start a stable career, then it won’t be too hard when we come back here.”

You smiled with a bright “that sounds great!” but there was a hint of worry in your eyes. Nicholas liked that. “Jinyoung is always reliable, isn’t he?” you said, looking away for a second. Nicholas nodded in agreement; trusting Jinyoung would be the only right thing to do in any situation.

“So are you all going?”

“Me and hyung are gonna fly out first, then we’ll get the others to come.” You didn’t say anything for a while so Nicholas reached over to clutch your hand. “When I get back, you’ll be dating a real rapper.” He hoped these words could at least be somewhat comforting to you.

“I already see you as a real artist,” you told him with a smile.

“Dude, what’s the deal?” asked Daniel, walking into Nicholas’s room as he was getting dressed for the day. “Mina just asked me if she can stay in the guest bedroom for the rest of the trip... did y’all fight?”

“We broke up,” Nicholas told him plainly.

“What?” Daniel couldn’t hide his shock. “We literally here to relax and you guys went ahead and made your own drama.”

Nicholas sighed in irritation. “Daniel, I really don’t want to talk about this right now.” The younger boy fell silent, and put his hands in his pockets, staring at the floor. 

“Well damn... so did y’all break up break up or...” Nicholas knew he was referring to the ‘incident’ with you . It wasn’t something he was proud of, the fact that all his friends, who were avid supporters of you, were conscious of the whole thing. 

“Fuck... I don’t know. Girls are so complicated.”

Daniel pressed his lips together. “Really, I think you’re complicated.” The two boys chuckled quietly, unsure of what was funny. “So you still up for tonight?”

“I don’t think it’ll be good if I came.. since Mina...”

“Bro, she’s coming too.”

“Alright, I’ll think about it.”

As Daniel was leaving the room, Nicholas asked him to keep quiet about the whole situation to which he respectfully obliged. Daniel was known to have a big mouth but he was also trustworthy and always had his friends best interests at heart. And with that thought, Nicholas found it might be easier to forget about everything and have a fun night out with the boys instead of moping around like this. His friends would be by his side anyway and maybe that’s what he needed at the moment.

Nicholas left the solace of his bedroom to join the rest outside. “Yo, Mina, I got smth for you,” said Jinyoung, walking over to where she sat next to Daniel. She looked up from her phone, trying to peer around Jinyoung to see what he had hidden behind his back. Nicholas also watched, trying not to look too unhappy.

“You know how you love Post Malone? Well, he’s in the city, performing tonight and we got you tickets.”

Nicholas saw Mina’s expression brighten  as she took the tickets from Jinyoung and jumped up, shaking her hips in delight.

“Oh my gosh, you’re the best!” She threw her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. Daniel pulled her back onto the couch.

“Don’t get too excited, you’re going with Owen.”

Mina’s lips parted and she rolled her eyes. “Ugh, are you serious?”

“I heard that!” Owen called from the kitchen to which Mina gave Daniel a sheepish look and he grinned, ruffling her hair. 

Rather than being envious of the way his friends treated her, Nicholas found himself feeling sympathetic. Mina had a way of hiding her emotions ― much like you ― and she was too obviously pretending she didn’t care about what had happened earlier that morning. Her pretense had worked for her in the past but Nicholas knew her too well. 

That night, Jinyoung and Daniel came into Nicholas’s room, informing him that they were leaving and if he’d like to join. “Can I come a bit later? I’m just not feeling it right now,” Nicholas told them, hiding away under his covers where he had been napping in all afternoon after a tiring shopping session with daniel. 

“Bro, you’ve been sleeping all day, what’s wrong with you,” said Daniel, trying to pull his blankets off but Nicholas held on to them tightly in fear his friends might see his phone open to your instagram page which he had been scrolling through for the past hour.

Jinyoung just sighed. “Daniel, leave it. Don’t force him to come.” Nicholas looked at him with grateful eyes and Jinyoung nodded. “I actually gave Mina those tickets so she’d leave you alone tonight,” he chuckled and Nicholas threw a pillow at him. “But you can join us whenever you’d like.”

“Thank you, hyung.”

When everyone left, the house was quiet and Nicholas hated how lonely he felt right now, but he brought it upon himself . He reached for his phone again, refreshing your instagram page to see that you had updated your story. 

Hesitantly, he brought his thumb on top of your profile picture, swallowing hard as your story opened up to reveal a picture of you with your arm draped around an unfamiliar girl, a bottle in your hand, your trademark million dollar smile plastered across your pretty face. You had tagged “Avalon Club” and Nicholas realized it was the same club his friends were going to. That’s why Daniel wanted me to come so bad.

Nicholas closed the story and went through your instagram posts once again. You had changed a lot and the posts showed it clearly. There was a gap in dates wherein you hadn’t posted at all and the posts from before the gap were of him and you, years of memories locked in a couple photos that had been buried under the more recent ones of you looking happier.

“Call when you land, alright?” you said, pulling away from the hug with Jinyoung. You asked him since you knew Nicholas would pass out and forget by the time they go to Korea.

“Don’t worry, I will,” Jinyoung replied, fixing his beanie that had almost fallen off from the contact. You finally moved to Nicholas who was waiting for you with open arms. He pulled you against him, burying his face in your hair ― little did he know, it would be the last time he’d get to do so.

“I’m gonna miss you so much,” you told him with a little pout. Nicholas saw that you were trying hard to hold in your tears and he pulled you closer again so the others wouldn’t see. “Don’t you forget about me while you’re there, okay?”

He moved back, cupping your cheeks. “How could I ever forget about you?”

But the truth is he could, and he did. After going to Korea, Nicholas found himself busier than he would have expected. He made sure to keep you updated for the first couple weeks but after one or two hectic months, he couldn’t find motivation to pick up his phone and call you. His busy schedule kept him occupied but even when he was free, it seemed there was no time for you.

Besides that, Nicholas’s new life presented him with extravagances he could never have imagined of in a thousand lifetimes, nor could he refuse them. Although he had done a very selfish deed and couldn’t muster up the courage to face you after that. 

But the girls that went back and forth from Nicholas’s room didn’t pass without the knowledge of his friends who thought he was being sus and questioned him about it. “Did you break up with Y/N?” asked Jinyoung.

“Uhhh...”

Jinyoung shook his head. “I did not expect this from you... seeing how attached you were to her, I thought you’d be begging to go back to America everyday.”

“Calm down, she’s prolly in another guy’s pants right now too.”

But both men knew you weren’t like that. Nicholas didn’t bother sending a breakup text because you had probably forgotten about him as well. However, you didn’t feel that way at all.

When the crew returned to America after gaining some popularity, you were still there, hitting nicholas up with instagram messages which he didn’t find it in himself to even open because at this point, ignorance was bliss. 

And it seemed like the eye contact he made with you on his first American stage spoke a thousand words, none that either of you could ever speak to each other. To this day, that look still haunted him. It wasn’t any normal “breakup” if you can even call it that. Because sometimes, he found a part of himself was still with you.

Nicholas must have watched your story about a million times, staring at the picture of you for so long his eyes began to hurt. He couldn’t stay here any more. He was pathetic.

“Look what the cat dragged in,” Daniel smirked when Nicholas finally arrived at the club. He had already drowned his self-pity in a few drinks when Daniel and Jinyoung found him seated at the bar.

“Having fun?”

“We should be asking you that,” said Jinyoung, propping his elbow on top of the counter. “You look down... was it Mina?” At this, Nicholas’s head snapped toward Daniel who shook his head quickly.

“I didn’t say anything, I swear.”

“Mina told us you guys were having a fight in the car while we were dropping her off,” Jinyoung explained. “What’s gotten into you?”

Nicholas sighed. “Yeah... it was my fault not hers. Did she tell you we broke up?” His relationship with her was on a thin line.

“Uh no, she said you guys were ‘on a break’ or sum like that.”

Though slightly disappointed, Nicholas was relieved that she didn’t want to leave him altogether. His heart already felt weak at the thought of losing yet someone important in his life again.

“By the way... Y/N’s here,” Daniel said quietly. “We wanted to tell you so it doesn’t turn out like last time.” Nicholas faked surprise but in reality, he knew all too well your whereabouts. 

“That’s nice... I don’t really feel like talking to her right now, though.”

“I guess you gotta tell her that yourself.”

“What do you mean?”

Jinyoung cleared his throat, getting up from his seat. “Don’t look now but she’s walking right towards us.” Nicholas froze. That means you were probably right behind him. Nicholas and Daniel smiled and waved at you over Nicholas’s head and then gave him a look before walking away.

“Hey stranger.” Your voice was soft, almost like a melodic tune. He hadn’t heard it in what felt like ages.

Nicholas turned around. “Y/N! I haven’t seen you in forever! Wow, I can’t believe you’re here!” Was that too much? Who cared, he’d already messed up whatever image of himself you had in your mind. You hugged him but it felt like the distance between you two increased and it was like he couldn’t even feel you.

“I came to your concert but I guess your friends didn’t tell you I was there,” you said, sitting down in the seat next to him. “I figured if you did see me, you would have talked to me but you didn’t so...” 

Nicholas laughed in embarrassment but inside a piece of him died. It seemed he had been too obvious with his hesitation. Or maybe he was just an asshole. The latter seemed quite accurate. 

“Anyway, you are you?”

A mess, Nicholas could reply. But instead he said, “I’m good... I mean, I’m better than better.” 

“How’s life as a celebrity?” you asked, laughing. Nicholas couldn’t bring himself to look at you but your laugh felt like medicine all it’s own.

“Wellll, I don’t really feel like one.”

“Really? You sure do act like one.” You murmured the last part. Was this your way of saying ‘fuck you’ to Nicholas? Perhaps Nicholas was thinking about it too much. He needed to drink a little more.

“Can I get you a drink?” he asked and you shook your head. 

“Nah, I was leaving with my friends right now actually... then I saw you.” You started to get up, taking your bag with you. “I’ll see you around then.” 

You can’t seriously let her leave like this, Nicholas thought to himself as his chest tightened. This may or may not be the last time he’d get to see you. A part of him wanted to remain that selfish and stupid self and let you go your way, as if just seeing you was closure enough.

But it wasn’t. The conversation was riddled with tension and if he hadn’t known any better, you were surely throwing shade at him for what he had done. If this was the only way to get rid of the guilt, Nicholas had to at least try.

He gulped down whatever was left in his glass and then stopped you. “Wait, Y/N! You got a minute?” You shrugged, sitting back down, clutching your purse tightly. Nicholas took a deep breath. 

“Listen... I don’t want to do this all over again,” he said quietly. “I just want to say I’m so sorry for being the worst boyfriend ever... and for being a dick and-”

“Nick,” you said, cutting him off. “I forgive you.” Nicholas fell silent. Those three words didn’t give him the relief he thought he’d get. A lot of him thought that you’d tell him you missed him and that you waited for him all this time and that you still love him. 

But none of that came. 

“Seriously...? Just... like that?”

You pressed your lips together. “I mean, what do you want me to say? That I still have feelings for you and I want to get back together?”

It sounded weird out loud the more Nicholas thought about it. “I just wanted closure... I mean, I’ve been kinda thinking about it and it was unfair to you.”

“Just forget it, Nicholas. You said you were ‘better than better’, what now?”

“Maybe I was lying,” he murmured and like that the stony expression on your face crumbled, softened to your glowing features as you stared at the glass surface of the counter.

“Maybe I’m lying too,” you said. “I mean, I know I said I forgave you but sometimes, I sit down thinking of you and I hate you.” Nicholas chewed on the bottom of his lip as you spoke. All this time he’d been worrying about his feeling and his guilt that he never thought about you.

“I hate you for not coming back for me when you promised me you would. But you know what, you have new friends, a new girl, a new life... who am I to tell you you can’t enjoy that?” You sat back and then looked at Nicholas and Nicholas looked back at you. It was the first time you two made direct eye contact and it didn’t feel like a knife piercing through him. 

“The last time we were together, I couldn’t help thinking of the future and...” you swallowed hard, taking Nicholas’s hands in yours. Your hands were just as soft as Nicholas remembered. “I knew that this would happen because I know you, Nick. I still let you go and maybe it was stupid but I was right.”

Nicholas held your hands tightly. “I wish that I could go back and change things... I swear I’m not like that any more.”

“Maybe you’re not,” you said, reaching up to touch the side of his face. “I hated you for what you did but I admire you for being able to sit here right now and at least tell me how you feel, even if it’s two years later. You’re not who you used to be, I know that.”

“That’s all I want,” Nicholas whispered. “To know that you don’t hate me.” You smiled and exhaled softly.

“I don’t. And I’m not holding this above you, Nick. We were so good together but we ended and that’s fine too. The best way to move on, though, is to let go of what you can’t control, let go of the past, Nicholas. The universe will align itself.” 

There were some days when Nicholas felt suffocated just thinking about you.You two didn’t end on good terms, if you had ended properly at all. But if this was the last goodbye, then Nicholas felt himself healing a little bit. 

You slid off your seat and kissed Nicholas’s lips. He couldn’t give in and kiss you back, but neither did he have the strength to pull away.

“There. Now we officially broke up,” you giggled, slinging your purse over your shoulder. “Maybe I’ll see you later, or maybe I won’t. Don’t beat yourself up over me.” You began to leave with your friends and turned around one last time to wave goodbye. 

It felt like a certain weight had been lifted off his shoulders. Nicholas didn’t feel guilty anymore, the chains around his ankles were finally free. 

He took out his phone and texted Mina. “I’m sorry for everything.” Nicholas got a reply almost immediately, giving him the impression that Mina might have been thinking of him too.

She texted. “I know, love.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”